#I kinda popped off with these character designs from four years ago I just have like. more technical skill now

[emotionally-charged-arson]

Dr. Hans Jürgen Kürsch, former Associate Professor (Celestial Cartography and Interstellar Astrophysics) and Head of the Department of Astronomy at Alphan Central University

6” x 8”, alcohol markers and fineliners. For @ay-miphae ‘s character chain. 💫

[pinencurls]

“I could just hold you and listen to your voice all night long.”

Hiii so this is my entry to @stellarboystyles‘s three year anniversary fic challenge! I’ve been busy with getting ready for classes starting and balancing other stuff so I wrote it on and off for a week and a bit but I hope you all enjoy! Feedback is so so encouraged and appreciated <3 

Here’s my masterlist of some other stuff I’ve written x 

Enemies (more like friends but oops) to lovers, prompt 9 “I could just hold you and listen to your voice all night long.”

14k+ :) Not read through sorry! pls let me know of any mistakes and I’ll correct them <3 (also i k n o w the title's bad but i couldn’t think of anything, pls feel free to leave any recs.)

- - - - 

It isn’t that I hate Harry. He just makes me feel...insecure. He’s never said or done anything directly but it’s hard to feel good about yourself when all your closest confidants seem to compare you to somebody else, somebody they so clearly hold higher above you. There wasn’t a single day I could meet a mutual friend of mine and Harry’s and not have them sing his praises, and apparently everyone was a mutual friend. I’ve known Julia and Theo for years, we all met in uni when they first started going out but it wasn’t until a year ago that I somehow ended up finding myself a regular within the friendship group they’d formed when they both went into the music and fashion industries. They had ties everywhere and after a pure coincidence of running into them and their circle at a pub, almost all my weekends were spent in various art galleries or new restaurants owned by somebody’s cousin or the guy they met last night at a Fleetwood Mac concert. 

I’d met Harry about five months into hanging out with the group. He’d known them a lot longer than I had, weaving his way into the little pockets of interesting people for years since the x factor. I was busy with work the first few times he was in town but after a while, Nick, the persistent party planner of the group who always managed to wrangle us together, insisted that I just had to meet him.                  . . . . . 

Eleanor’s house is huge and buzzing with hundreds of strangers. I cling to Julia and Theo’s side, Nick and Eleanor are nowhere in sight - most likely playing host or drinking too much chardonnay in another corner of the house. These four are the only people I can say I really know here, sure there are a few familiar faces on the dance floor, either from having met them at any of Eleanor's past elaborate parties or just because of they’re not so subtle fame. That’s another thing, all the people sipping wine and dancing around me are fairly...well known. Either just within the industry or to the general public too, they’d all gain fairly high status. It was a fluke really that I got on so well with Julia when we first met on a fashion course in uni. 

Julia had big goals, all of which she was on track to fulfil, that conflicted slightly with mine. Her goals consisted of runway show models clad in designer brands she might one day contribute to whereas mine were more...anti, that whole world. It took a few years to find a steady footing but eventually, I was proud of where I’d ended up: a comfortable little cubby in the fashion and sustainability columns of a handful of independent magazines. After a few nights out with Julia, I was pleasantly surprised to find her shared interests and solidarity in my work and ambitions of her own within the same ideology. But whilst that’s all well and good, I’m still very much the small indie journalist that slips through the cracks when it comes to small talk at these kinds of events. It became apparent pretty quickly that my latest articles on how fast fashion had begun its destruction of a liveable environment in developing countries weren’t as relevant or interesting to the people promoting Prada and Calvin Klein as the next met gala theme. 

“Do you want another drink?” Theo asks from beside me, pulling my focus from my scan of the room. 

“No thanks..I’m good.” I murmur, debating how long I have to stay before I can slip out and feel a little less awkward around all the people I have no clue how to talk to. “Think I’m gonna head off actually..”

“Look I know you hate networking, but this is just a chill get-together yeah?” Theo chuckles, squeezing my shoulder before taking another sip from his gin and tonic. “We’re in the same boat about these snooty things but tonight’s not like that, relax a bit will ya.” 

Theo works mostly with small-time music artists, producing debut albums and such so we share the same deep discomfort for the many events we often find ourselves at. It’s how we got close really, week after week we’d trail behind Julia as she strikes up conversations with Hollywood elite...and he always makes getting piss drunk in someone’s pool house exceptionally fun. 

Before I can further any excuses about getting home to start on the legitimate and ever-growing pile of work deadlines on my desk, a tall man in far too much Gucci to belong anywhere but in a room full of models and artists makes a beeline straight from the bar to our awkward party. 

“Harry!” Theo shouts, embracing the slightly tipsy man in a hug he reciprocates. 

“It’s been too long mate, how ‘ave you been?” Harry cheers, leaning back from the hug and grinning down at his friend. 

“I’ve been good - busy, enjoying the free bar as always.” Theo jokes, motioning between his and my matching G and T’s. Harry’s eyes wander up from the drink, realisation dawning on his face as he smiles again.

“Ah and you must be the famous Olivia,” He reaches his hand out to mine and shakes it lightly. “Sorry I didn’t introduce myself, ‘m Harry, it’s good to finally meet you, love.”  

“Likewise.” I smile, trying to suppress the blush his words of endearment tease. I can’t deny the natural charm and charisma everyone always talks about now that it’s hitting me straight on. There’s something about the way he doesn’t hesitate to hold eye contact just that little bit longer that makes the room go still for just a second. He’d got it down to a T.

“Aww I see you two have finally met!” Nick interrupts. My hand falls from Harry’s grip as he’s welcomed into another hug. “About fucking time as well, been trying get this one to take a night off for weeks!”

“I literally came out with you last Thursday!” I counter, not missing the smirk setting on Harry’s face as he watches Nick and I’s back and forth. “And the Saturday before, come to think of it I’m always out with you Nicky.” 

“Not when Harry’s in town though n’ that’s a different kinda night.” Nick laughs, his beer sloshing slightly in his free hand as his other remains draped over Harry’s shoulders. 

That was maybe the first sign of my slight resentment for Harry. All night I wandered around with Theo hearing little bits of conversations, all surrounding the star of the party. I understood this wasn’t his doing, his humility was clear in every one of his bashful attempts to turn the conversation away from his growing achievements and onto literally anything else. He was, however, a self-proclaimed narcissist. Every time somebody would swoon over him and insist he stay the topic of conversation, a smirk tugged at his lips and stayed there as he consumed the endless and animated praise from almost all the party guests. 

I’d expected some of his qualities to be untrue, learning from the past never to believe blindly of someone’s pure character when you didn’t truly know them. Especially when they frequented the gossip columns. But it wasn’t him so much, he was true to his motto of kindness and courteous even as people fawned over him, it was more the attention that surrounded him. As the night went on it became clear what Nick meant even if he didn’t know it himself. A night out with Harry was different because everyone made sure to capitalize off how different he made them feel.

. . . . .

“Can I get you anything else M’am?” The young waitress asks as she clears up my empty mug and saucer. My eyes falter a little as they adjust from the blue light of my laptop I’ve been staring at for the last twenty minutes. 

“Um- oh please could I just get a refill?” I ask. 

“Sure thing - mint tea right?” She smiles, adjusting the mug in her hands to make a quick note. 

 “Yeah..s’perfect - thank you.” She’s gone before she hears my delayed gratitudes, definitely used to the throngs of bemused writers tapping away at their laptops for hours. 

I turn back to my open google doc. So far it’s written in two parts I have no idea how to connect and my senseless rereading hasn’t resulted in any legitimate progress in almost an hour. I’d accept the rut I’m stuck in and work on something else for the day if I didn’t only have the day. Last night had been filled with plans of settling in early and finishing the last two thousand words on an upcoming sustainable clothing brand. That all went out the window of course as my phone buzzed off the kitchen counter with Nick’s insistence of yet another night out to celebrate ending the work week - his was quite different to mine. It was easy to ignore the persistent beeping of my phone as new texts and call notifications popped up every three minutes, but less so when the rhythmic bursts of noise were replaced by knocks on my front door. 

Within 40 minutes of opening it to Nick in a silk shirt and jeans too skinny for someone pushing thirty, I was two drinks in and dancing to Blue DeTiger with a pair of hands on my waist that I didn’t entirely recognise. It was just the six of us: Me, Nick, Ellie, Theo, Julia and Harry.

He was hard to ignore, not that I was trying particularly hard. On the drive over, the limited backseat space in Nick’s car and close proximity had practically forced me into his lap. Even with thighs pressed tightly against each other, we hardly talked, a few polite hellos here and there and then silence as we listened to Eleanor recall her latest night with whichever blonde bassist was her ‘soulmate’ that week. The whole ride over, Harry kept his hands on the thigh closest to the door and leant his shoulders the same way as to touch me as little as possible - which was still quite a lot considering the packed five seater pushing seven passengers. It was fairly common knowledge we weren’t close and I got the feeling he wasn’t too keen on me, but he could at least not act like touching me would be the worst thing ever. 

As the night went on he clung to Theo, ever the cuddly drunk, and I stayed more to the pleasant stranger I’d found on the dance floor.

No meanest was ever intended between us but I couldn’t help but watch the kindergarten like bitterness grow as everyone just loved him. We couldn’t go anywhere without a crying fan or two approaching the sweet and smiling man who always answered their questions affectionately and hugged them goodbye. The times he was out of town were always filled with comments about his absence, as if none of us were good enough without his added presence. I couldn’t help but wonder why they even bothered to bring me into their little group. The lack of closeness between Harry and I felt almost like a lack of closeness to the group as a whole, despite how much my individual friendships with everyone advanced. 

Just as I thank the waitress - Alice, her name tag read, and take the first sip of my third tea (I had to switch after a particularly strong starter coffee) I notice a familiar man out the corner of my eye looking just as rough as me. Of course he’s wearing it better than I am. 

Harry collects a drink from the counter and bows his head slightly in thanks, turning and catching my eye just as he’s on his way out. He waves with his free hand and shoots me a candid smile before making a quick change in direction towards my small table. 

“Long time no see,” He pulls the chair opposite me out a little as he chuckles at his own joke. He perches lightly, temporarily. “How’ve you been?”

“A little hungover, I won’t lie..” I laugh, surprised by the whole encounter. “You?” 

“Same, I might have had a shot or two too many,” I nod knowingly and shut my laptop softly. He sips what smells like coffee before going on. “Are ya workin? Sorry to interrupt.” 

“Oh no- I mean I am but it doesn’t matter really, ‘ve kinda hit a dead end.” His eyes hover, waiting for me to go on. “I was gonna get it done last night but Nick had other plans..” 

“Yeah Nick’ll do that to you,” He laughs, “What’re you writing ‘bout?” 

He leans slightly forwards, holding eye contact and shuffling comfortably into his chair. 

“Oh just this promotional piece on a new company, they’re hiring young women and training them to make these handmade clothes. They’re paying them above minimum wage and focusing on sustainability so this editor I’ve written for before offered me it.” I’m not really sure how sincere he is in his curiosity, he always seems to have time to listen when Julia has a new design plan or Theo’s found a new artist but that’s different really. I stop before I start to ramble, just in case. 

“That’s so cool, what kinda stuff are they making?” He prompts, resting his chin on his fist, imitating the posture of an eager little kid. 

“They've started stocking stuff by other independent artists but mostly dungarees and these cool cord trousers, they’d suit you actually, even got some 70s style ones.” Now that the two worlds are colliding in my head, I can’t help but imagine Harry in a pair of their forest green cords, the wide legs would almost bury his vans but a part of me is pretty sure he’d love them. 

“Thanks, if they come at your recommendation I might have to get my hands on a pair,” He smiles, his tone’s a lot different to the usual polite cheer, it’s difficult to place where it’s landed before he’s talking again. “Reminds me of that show you took us to with the upcycled clothes, all those dungarees made of old quilts - remember?” 

It’d been a small exhibit just outside of London I’d mentioned offhandedly and somehow ended up showing everyone around. It was nice to have them all in my world for an evening. Marcus, a friend of mine from college, had put it together and created a lot of the pieces. He and the others I’d met through my work were fairly shocked to say the least when Harry Styles came traipsing through the doors behind me. All night he quietly asked Nick questions, to which Nick only responded by motioning towards me and wandering off to the bar. 

“I do - I’m surprised you do to be honest.” It slips before I can decide if it sounds passive aggressive or not. To be fair, it had been a surprise to me, meeting everyone at the train station and watching Harry and Nick scramble out a taxi and run towards us. He’d been dressed in proper gallery attire and seemed genuinely thrilled to be joining in on the rare night I actually played host. 

“Course I do, it was a good night...I’d choose it over Nick’s tequila Tuesdays anyday.” His phone buzzes on the table, a text popping up in green. “Oh I- my manager’s waiting sorry.” 

A sheepish smile is accompanied by a loose arm movement towards the door where, out on the street, I see Jeff. He’s shaking his head and motioning for Harry to hurry up. Had Harry sat down to talk to me whilst his manager had been waiting this whole time? 

“It was good running into you, good luck with it all,” He stands. “See you friday yeah?” 

I’d totally forgotten about his “Whenever I’m in town Friday film night.” until he mentioned it. I’d been twice in the past and stayed quietly to my corner of the sofa, only watching as everyone else laughed at whatever romcom had been chosen that night. 

“I-maybe.” He shakes his head as I smile, not quite ready to commit a whole evening to watching Nick raid Harry’s wine cellar. 

“You better, I’m gonna need to hear more ‘bout those cords.” He points his hand in a kind of joking reprimand/wave before he’s gone back down the aisle of tables to the door where Jeff ruffles a hand through his hair and laughs when his hands fly to fix the now birdnest of brown curls. 

I open my laptop back up, skimming over the last few lines I wrote to get myself back on track. I take a sip and my tea’s gone cold. 

. . . . .

“Are you coming to Harry’s tonight?” Eleanor asks down the phone, her voice chipper as she no doubt raids her closet. 

“Maybe, I don’t know..I’ve got this deadline Monday morning that I’m nowhere near meeting.” 

“Come on Liv, we haven’t seen you all properly together since last month, and last week doesn’t count it was too loud to actually talk!” She chimes in, the sound of clothes being tossed to the floor clear in the distant background. “Have you got a problem with Harry or something?” 

“No Elle, of course I don’t-” 

“Then why do you guys never talk? You hardly come with us when he’s around and when you do you barely even say hello.” Eleanor complains, she’s mentioned it in the past but it’s been easy to blow off with excuses of how busy he usually was making his way around the room to greet everyone or how we just hadn’t known each other that long and weren't particularly close yet. 

“I just...I don’t know, I don’t think he likes me very much.” I pause. I still haven't decided what last Saturday was in the cafe. “We’re not really close and I’d prefer not to spend another night listening to people tell him - and everyone else - how great he is.” 

“You’re saying that like he’s some arrogant twit, if you came out with us more you’d see what he’s really like around his friends. Or you know, you could actually talk to him when we’re together and see that he’s not a dick?” 

It was a fair point. I haven’t made much of an effort over the past year to spend any time with him outside of larger gatherings or to have genuine conversations with him that went past the weather or a new jacket one of us had on. Maybe he really is a good guy away from all the pretentious crowds and watchful eyes he usually called to our group. He’d certainly seemed different in the quiet Saturday surroundings of Blondies Coffee Roasters in between sips of coffee. 

“Okay, okay yeah I’ll see you there.” We hang up a couple of minutes later and I’m left alone in my kitchen again.

. . . . . 

“Hey!” Harry cheers as the door swings open to reveal him in yet another pair of flared pants that hung comfortably around his waist. “Come in, come in.” 

We all pile in through the doorway as he steps aside. Arms weaving through each other as we hang coats and jackets and Julia passes Harry the fruit platter she’d made (and scolded us all for picking at on the drive over.) 

“Oh very appropriate,” Harry laughs as he uncovers the tray to reveal an array of sliced watermelon, strawberries and grapes, He sets the fruit down on the table in the lounge for us all to eat and shakes his head lightly. I look up at Julia for an explanation but she’s too busy claiming the comfiest loveseat for the night. “I’m never telling you anything again, Jules.” 

Julia and Harry tease each other for a moment more until Theo catches my confused stares and laughs to himself. 

“Harry wrote a song ‘bout fruit- another one actually,” Theo starts, tucking himself beside Julia and letting her take over before he can finish. “S’not just about fruit though is it H?” 

Harry blushes slightly and settles his glare on Julia as he carries six wine glasses through to the table. 

“‘S about watermelon, it just has some..” He clears his throat as he fumbles for his next sentence. “Other themes to it too.” 

“As if mate,” Theo’s laughter booms, “ Basically Liv, he wrote this new song the other day all about how much he loves to-” 

“Watermelon!” Harry yells, pointing an accusatory finger at Theo. “S’all about how much I love watermelons...I’m a fruit guy.” 

“Oh are we talking about the pussy song?” 

All heads snap round to see Nick, obviously having let himself in and now chuckling softly to himself as he leans against the archway into the room. 

“Oh sorry H, were you tryna give an interview answer?” 

Harry just slaps his palm over his eyes and lets his shoulders shake for a minute before he bounces back to host mode. 

“Okay!” I can’t help but notice how flushed the tips of his ears are as he claps his hands together, desperately trying to move on from the conversation. “Who wants wine?” 

Fifteen minutes later everyone is settled onto the sofas with an array of throws between us and a layout of fruits, crisps and other mid rom com snacks that make me feel bad I left my flat in too much of a hurry to remember anything but hummus. 

“Okay - Sixteen Candles, When Harry Met Sally or Mamma Mia?” Nick calls out, waving the tv remote above his head to get everyone's attention. An outpour of votes follows - you’d think between only six of us we’d be able to sort out a process by now but still we fall into momentary anarchy as the room divides. 

“Mamma Mia is a classic!” Eleanor protests as Nick’s shaking his head. 

“And Billy Crystal isn’t?” He yells back, eyes wide and genuinely offended. 

“Colin Firth is arguably more iconic, Nick really, come on.” Theo sighs. He accepts the high fives Ellie and I reach out to him and saluts us both. 

“We’ve all seen Mamma Mia before though, we’ve never watched When Harry Met Sally all together,” Julia points out, winning a smirk and nod of approval from Nick. 

There’s a beat of silence while Nick weighs up the votes in his head. He tilts to the side slightly and eyes Harry up, our gazes following. 

“Harry?” 

“Ellie?” 

“Come on, you’ve got the last vote here, and I know how much you like Meryl.” Nick gasps a little, the mention of Meryl Streep as a wager to win Harry over to his opposing team was definitely foul play in his eyes. 

“Yeah but he loves When Harry Met Sally...and he is a narcissist..” Julia offers into the debate, a few snickers follow her comment before we all turn to look at Harry. We’re all already half a glass in but I could swear for just a moment his eyes lingered over me, fluttering down to my smile before turning back to announce his decision to Nick. 

“I’m afraid I am in the mood for a bit of Abba,” Cheers and not so subtle murmurs of frustration fill the lounge as Nick scrolls through the Romance bar on Netflix before clicking on the film of just over half of our choosing. 

Everyone goes quiet as the film starts, breaking out into bursts of song only as the cast does. From the conversation in the car, it’s pretty clear everyone has just been through a pretty tiring week. We all tended to pile our workload a little heavy so it was always nice to escape for a few hours at the weekend and relax together.

Just as Voulez-vous plays through the room, a slightly tipsy Nick leans into Harry to serenade the singer with his own rendition. The duo sway slightly, both narrowly avoiding Nick’s wild limbs before there’s a crash and Harry’s cursing. 

“Oh- H, Sorry!” 

Nick’s wine glass that’d been balanced on the coffee table in front of him moments before now lays on its side. The, luckily white, wine trickles down onto the rug but most noticeably splashes into Harry’s lap. I’m not entirely sure how he managed it, it must have flown forwards when it was knocked but Harry quickly stands to access the damage. 

“I’m so sorry Harry I-” 

“Don’t worry mate, I’m just gonna go change and toss these in the wash..could you wipe that up for me?” Nick nods, looking a little less cheerful and a lot more guilty now as Harry makes it way out the room. He calls behind him: “Keep watching I’ll only be a second!” 

Nick finishes wiping down the table and rug just as Harry jogs back into the room. I don’t mean to and I’m never one to check people out..unless very subtly, but I can’t help but let my eyes linger a little. 

He’s still in his plain tee but instead of his fancy pants he’s found some soft wash denim jeans. The whole look paired with his thick rimmed glasses and how his hair's gotten tousled about by Nick throughout the night just made him look so...ordinary. Not in any bad way, anyone who met Harry knew he could never be ordinary, no matter how casual he dressed, but something about seeing him abandon the more dressed up looks and go for the comfortable option just made him seem different. 

In a second his green eyes are complimenting the look too as he gazes down at me. 

“Hi,” He mouths, nobody’s taken much notice of his return, yet another musical number taking everyone’s attention. It’s my turn to blush a little now. I avert my eyes quickly, anywhere really, before sneaking a quick look up at him to smile back. 

Ellie had helped Nick in the “For fucksake save Harry’s rug it probably costs more than your car” mission and had stolen the seat beside him after they were done. It slipped my mind until Harry set the new bottle of wine on the table and sunk down into the space beside me, He curls one leg underneath him and slips me one more smile before turning back to the screen just as Donna and Sam start singing SOS.

. . . . . 

“Ah shit, I think I left my book!” I curse just as we make it down the road to Julia’s car. Parking was shit so by the time we found a spot we’d ended up a good 15 minutes away from Harry’s house. “You guys go on, I’m only round the corner anyway.” 

Theo and Julia were familiar with my stubbornness so let me go, yelling their goodbyes after a few hugs as they drove away, Ellie and Nick do the same as they clamber into a taxi. I turn quickly in the chilly air and make my way back down the street to Harry’s drive, punching in the familiar code at his gate before running up to the door hastily. 

It was open - as always, so I let myself in. He was probably still cleaning the lounge up after we all got a little too tipsy. 

“Hey it’s me...just left my book sorry!” I call down the hallway. It’s quiet despite the light Paul Simon playing in the distance so I make my way quickly to the sofas I’d spent most of the night on, praying to avoid an awkward run-in with Harry. 

Although we’d actually shared some light conversation throughout the night and a handful of smiles, I’m not sure we’re quite at the stage in our friendship that me more or less breaking into his house wouldn’t be awkward to run into. 

The lounge is empty when I get there. The side tables are still littered with wine glasses and tacky red rings on coasters but no Harry in sight. Or book for that matter. 

I start pulling back the cushions carefully - god knows how much they cost. Despite scouring the one spot I’d pretty much clung to the whole night -  incidentally beside Harry -  I have no luck. Nick tossed the book back to me at some point in the night after reading it by my recommendation but knowing him it could have ended up anyway. I follow the breadcrumbs of our night down another hallway as I vaguely remember Nick talking about a certain plot twist as we searched Harry’s kitchen cupboards for the wine he’d sent us off to restock. 

As I come around the white archway into his kitchen I catch a glimpse of him from around the kitchen island. He has his back turned to me but he’s leant forwards against a counter with ring covered fingers clutching the edge, a glass of amber liquid set slightly away from him. 

“Oh, sorry I was just-” He jumps a little at my voice, turning quickly to face me with his now free hands coming up to hold his chest. When his eyes finally meet mine they’re red and it takes a second for him to register the tears still streaming from them before he replies. 

“Shit, fu- what are you..are you alright?” His hands bat between tangling into his hair and wiping the tears from his cheeks, anything to avoid actually looking up at me again. 

“Yeah, I just..um..left my book,” I mumble, taking a step closer to him when I notice how his hands shake as they move timidly around his face. “Harry, what’s wrong?”

“Uuuh um.” He wanders for a moment before slapping a palm lightly atop the counter and pulling out his infamous grin. “Nothing much, how bout you - find your book?” 

“-Harry..” I take another step close, “I know we’re not, ya know..close. But you can talk to me.” 

There’s a beat of silence when he keeps up the act, I’d almost believe it if it wasn’t for his bloodshot eyes and anxious fingers drumming against the tile. 

“What’s wrong?” 

He pauses for a moment, assessing whether or not to tell me whatever’s weighing so heavy on his shoulders. But the dam bursts. 

“Fuckin’ everything Love” He laughs, rubbing his palms over his face. I try to focus on the matter at hand: Harry weeping in his kitchen. But that name’s only ever left his mouth directed at me a handful of times and it’s never made my stomach flutter quite as it did just now. “Just..Fuck I’m so lonely Olivia.” 

I don’t really know any of the details but between conversation - mostly overheard, and the media frenzy, it was hard not to be aware of Harry’s break up two months ago. I can’t claim we were close enough to discuss it, having hardly ever talked beyond trivial issues, but I knew that despite them only being together two or so months, he’d been incredibly distant for the weeks that followed the break up. 

“I hear about you and Aubre..I’m really sorry it didn’t work out for you guys-” Harry laughs almost, a pained sort of chuckle that told me I was way off with this one. 

“It’s not..that isn’t why I..” He takes a deep breath before lifting his head up slightly to focus on where his fingers still tapped out a nervous beat on the counter. “I was lonely before her...and with her. I just, I can’t seem to get it right ever...feels like nobody wants to be with me for the right reasons.” 

“Hey no..what about tonight? Your house was full of so many people who love you yeah? Maybe your bougie wine collection had something to do with it but still,” He laughs at that, peeking up from behind his fringe for just a moment. “They- we love you ‘k?” 

“I know but, ‘clock hits the am and everyone leaves, it just gets...it gets so fucking lonely to see everyone in perfect pairs ya know?” 

I don’t really know what I’m doing but I’m doing it - my arms wrap over his shoulders and lock with a hand at the nape of his neck. We’ve never hugged before beyond a general greeting but anyone watching wouldn’t know it, his face burrows quickly into my shoulder and his arms cocoon over my waist, holding me tightly and slipping under the thick layers of my jacket. 

“I know exactly what you mean, H.” 

The hug lasts longer than I imagined it might. He smells of vanilla and the coffee he brought back in bulk from Jamaica. He lets out a shaky breath and melts further into me, nuzzling my neck softly with the tip of his nose. His curls are soft between my fingers and I find myself shhing him, lulling us both into a tired kind of calm. 

Another moment passes in the silence of his kitchen before Harry lets out an awkward cough and straightens up, pulling out of our hold and immediately covering his face with his palms again. 

“I..sorry Jules and Theo must be waiting for you..” Harry murmured, wiping the last of his tears away and letting his hands fall and fidget by his sides. 

“Oh no don’t worry they..um they already went I was actually just gonna walk.” I tell him, making his head perk up a bit. 

“Wha-It’s past twelve Liv it’s not safe, how far do you even live?” He clears his throat and his voice is clearer now, it feels like a whole different world to the one we were in just a minute ago. 

“It’s fine honestly, only take like thirty minutes walking - I’ve done it before-” I ramble, eager to put this situation behind me before I embarrass myself anymore. 

“No - let me drive you yeah?” Harry shakes his head, adamant. 

“Harry..we’ve been drinking all night, I think that’s more dangerous than me jus’ walking.” I laugh, holding his gaze for a second longer than I usually would - fuck, how do we usually act around each other?

Before I come to a conclusion, his eyes rest heavy on mine and I can see the cogs turning in his brain as he tries to work his way out of this one. Ever the people pleaser. 

“Then stay.” 

“Harry-”

“You said you know how it feels.” He cuts in, unwavering now as he doesn’t let my eyes fall from his. “So stay …’s safer anyway.” 

. . . . . 

“I can take the sofa, really Harry I don’t mind,” I reassure as he tosses me an old t-shirt and joggers to sleep in. “It’s comfier than my bed anyway. 

His guest bedrooms had just been painted and were still pretty fume filled so the sofa or his bed were the only options. For twenty minutes now he’s tried to convince me to take his bed and leave him on the sofa, despite the fact we both know he’s a little too tall to sleep without his feet hanging off the end. 

“But you’re my guest!” He protests again, coming up from his wardrobe to stand in front of me, hand on hips and an expression of concern on his face. 

“And you’re almost six foot!” 

“Hey, I am six foot.” He takes a deep breathe, exhaling through his nose in defeat before speaking again. “Okay, you can sleep on the sofa but if anyone asks I was the perfect host and you bullied me into this.” 

I laugh softly, this whole new side of Harry had never been directed solely at me before and it was honestly refreshing. Usually Nick or another friend was the target of his jokes and playful demeanor and I only noticed it from afar but now he was right in front of me, hauling pillows off his bed and sticking his tongue out when he caught me staring. 

“Are you sure you’ll be alright?” He asks for the third time since I agreed to stay the night. We’ve just finished setting up the sofa to sleep on and despite the duvet and many quilts far more lush than my own actual bed, he seemed unconvinced it was enough. 

“I’m sure” I sit back into the pile of blankets and pillows, tucking my feet underneath me and looking back up at Harry. “If you’re really not, just come watch a film with me and see how cozy it is.” 

The quick change in dynamic was a lot smoother than I’d imagined. Within an hour of being alone together we’d already talked more than in all our past interactions, not to mention how close we’ve gotten. He only nods his head quickly and he’s settling under a quilt beside me, rummaging around for a controller to pull up netflix again. 

“Mamma Mia two?” He asks. 

I chuckle a bit and nod. At the beginning of the evening I hadn’t quite seen it ending in a Mamma Mia marathon with just me and Harry. 

He presses play and as the opening display begins we both lean back into the sofa and pull the blankets up over us. It’s only in the quiet of the first few scenes that I notice we’re matching. We’re both dressed fully in his clothes, grey joggers and t-shirt - his rolling stones, mine fleetwood mac. And it all smells of him. I pull the blanket a little higher over my chest and the faint, but now familiar, scent of vanilla and coffee fills my lungs and for a second all I can focus on is how desperately I want to be in his arms again. 

. . . . .

“-ow” A groggy voice mumbles from above me and I feel myself being pulled forwards slightly against something hard - and warm. 

I’m a few seconds from falling straight back asleep before I feel the painful ache in the side of my neck. I reach a hand up to gauge my current situation and feel my fingers plunging into soft hair - soft hair that ends too soon to be mine. 

“Hi..” I recoil my hand quickly back to my side and push myself up so I’m sitting slightly. I look down and see Harry, half asleep still and hand still resting on my side. 

“Oh-hey sorry,” What do you say when you wake up beside the guy you barely knew but simultaneously had been incredibly vulnerable with just the night before? 

Harry seems to be waking up now and certainly more aware of our predicament as he pulls his hand away from where it was holding firmly onto the material of my - his - t-shirt and pushes himself up to sit against the arm of the sofa. 

“We must have fallen asleep..sorry I didn’t mean too, ya know…” His eyes flutter between where I sit opposite him and the “Are you still watching?” Netflix screen. 

“It’s fine, accidents happen an’ everything.” I smile, slipping out from the warm cocoon of blankets to stand. “I’m just gonna wash up quickly and I’ll be out of you hair.” 

Before I can rush off to tame my hair and hopefully find some toothpaste to rid me of my morning breath, Harry clasps his hand gently around my wrist and tugs slightly to get my attention. 

“Not in a rush Love, I’ll make us some breakfast.” He says it effortlessly, like it was a regular occurrence for us to fall asleep cuddling on his sofa. He stands, groaning as his knees pop appreciatively and lets my hand go before he’s disappearing into the kitchen.

“Okay…” I murmur to myself. “....okay.” 

. . . . .  

Alice is back at my table with my second refill before 11am. I thank her and take a gulp of the fiery ginger tea before reading over the last three paragraphs I just wrote. The spice licks my tongue as I tip the cup up for a second sip; it’s autumn after all. 

In the last two weeks September had slipped into October and all the trees in London had received the memo. I’d been busy, hoaled up in the quietest corner of Blondies the whole time with coffee filling all my senses. I haven’t seen everyone together since that night at Harry’s. I grabbed lunch with Eleanor the Monday afterwards and told her nothing, preferring to avoid the texts my phone amassed over the fortnight. I've turned down all proposed group activities and focused on work instead. To be fair, I do have a lot to get done. There were always seasonal pieces in my to do list and with the weather getting colder it was time I got to them before it was Christmas already. 

I haven’t talked to Harry either. He made us pancakes with blueberries and maple syrup in the morning and we haven’t even texted since; I’m not sure that we even have a private text between us. Eleanor and Julia have told me how much fun they’ve all had the times I’ve politely but persistently declined, I can only assume Harry’s in the mix with them all. He’s in town for awhile if I’m remembering our breakfast chatter correctly, it makes sense that they’re all hanging out together really when they don’t often get time together. Ellie’s phone calls keep me from sliding into thoughts of how easily I could fall right out of the group and not be missed, at least. I was just taking space for work. The fact that most of my afternoons at the cafe disappeared into me analysing anything I might ever have felt or said to Harry means nothing at all. 

Neither does the heightened pace of my heartbeat when he walks through the stiff wooden  doors of Blondies. 

He orders what I assume is his regular black coffee, scans the room for a second and lands directly on me. He hesitates a little to hold my gaze, turning his head to look outside before looking back at me and smiling. He thanks the server and takes a few quick steps towards me, weaving in between the packed tables to my little spot hidden away in the corner. 

“Hi,” He smiles again, although his toneos overshadowed by a slight anxious hilt. “Can I sit?” 

Nodding, I close my laptop and pull my tea closer to me to make a space for him. 

“Hi.” He repeats, smiling a little sheepishly. 

“Hi,” I wait a second, nervous to start when I’m so unsure of how this conversation has already gone in his head. But he doesn’t say anything so I push through and bite the bullet against my better judgement. “Look, about that Friday I-”

“Can I just-” He cuts me off, leaning forwards and opening his hands out as he mulls over his next few words. “I’m sorry if it was awkward at all, I didn’t mean for anything to happen and I thought we were fine an’ everything but then I haven’t seen you in two weeks and Ellie keeps saying you’re not comin’ out. Did I do something wrong?” 

“Oh god no,” I hurry, “You didn’t do anything it was just - I didn’t expect to wake up..like that...and it was just a really quick change because we’ve never really been close and suddenly it was just, us, like that.” 

He nods, pushing a loose curl back a second later that broke free in the motion. He seems understanding as he looks down before leaning his elbows against the table so only the two of us can hear what he’s about to say. 

“I know, I didn’t expect it either but, can I just tell you I’m glad that it happened?” He leaves a three second pause for me to flounder in confusion before continuing. “What I told you, ‘bout feeling lonely, it messes with my sleep all the time. I just get stuck in my own thoughts but the night you stayed over I slept fine - perfect even.”

Not sure what else to do with this new information, I nod for him to continue.

“I know we’ve never been close, but hanging out with you just really calmed me down.” He smiles, gaining confidence now in his vulnerability tucked away in our little hiding place. “Thank you for staying.” 

“I get what you mean.” I mumble, slightly anxious any of the busy customers with prying eyes could overhear my confession. “I never really know when to stop working and I think I got the best night sleep on your sofa I’ve had in awhile, which really speaks volumes about how crappy my mattress is.”  

He chuckles. Relief seems to settle in as he lets his shoulders relax and face soften. 

“I was thinking - especially now that I know it was good for you as well, maybe it could become more of a regular thing?” He asks, his forefinger and thumb pinch together and twist one of his rings a little - a nervous habit, I’m sure. 

“How do you mean?” 

“Like..when we all go out, maybe we go home together, you know - so we can sleep better.” He moves down to focus on the metal rose he’s still fumbling at. “If..if you don’t want to or you think it’d be weird it’s fi-” 

“I’d like that.” I reach forwards to comfort him, absentmindedly cupping my fingers around his. “I think it’d be nice, to get a good night's sleep I mean.” 

“I’m glad.” He beams.

“..That and you make a mean blueberry pancake.” I tease, earning a light chuckle from Harry. 

Just like our last cafe encounter, the ping of a his phone beats me to my new few words. He checks it quickly, shaking his head and glancing down the large room to the shop front where, once again, Jeff waits. He seems a little more agitated this time, waving vigorously whilst trying not to attract the attention of passersby, all  rather unsuccessfully. 

“Bollocks okay - I’ve gotta go,” Harry swears, collecting his coffee from the table and pushing his chair back quickly. “I’ll just - we can text before we go out next yeah?” 

“Cool, yeah - wait a sec, let me just give you my number.” I reach up for him to hand me his phone but he doesn’t make any effort to move, instead he blushes slightly and stares at the floor. “..What?” 

“I um, I already have it.” He fiddles with the hair at the nape of his neck before talking again. It’s hard not to remember how it felt when it was my fingers carding through his brown curls. “I got it from Theo awhile back when we were going to this thing, felt weird not having it. I hope that..okay and everythin’” 

I nod, smiling up at him. The idea of him having a part of me for this past year without me even knowing is oddly precious. The fact that he felt odd about not having my number and going to the effort of getting it from Theo was unbelievably endearing. 

“That’s fine, helpful actually.” I smile still, “Text me before we meet everyone and we’ll make a plan or somethin’” 

“Okay,” He smirks, his slight cocky nature reemerging. “Will do, Liv. See you soon?” 

“See you soon.” 

Jeff flies a hand up to his hair like before but this time is met with a grinning Harry who doesn’t seem to mind so much. 

. . . . . 

Unknown Number 

‘Hey! Is tonight good? We can slip off after drinks at the gallery. H x’ 

I look down at my phone. Caught off guard by the sudden text, I’d almost forgotten out arrangement. Julia invited us all to a gallery opening of one of her friend's new exhibits. Even as I flicked through my wardrobe for the right jacket, I hadn’t put two and two together and realised I’d be seeing Harry again for the first time since our chat at Blondies four days ago. 

I save his number and I think quickly, not wanting to leave him on read when he knew I’d be leaving to see them all any second and most likely spend the whole tube journey on my phone. 

‘Hi :) That’d work for me yh, just let me know when you want to leave and I’ll make an excuse. Liv x’ 

With another thought rushing through my head, I send a quick follow up. 

Me

‘Can we keep this between us right now? Might be a bit tricky to explain to the others.” 

Harry

‘Read my mind love.’

‘See you in a bit :)’ 

I’m still not the hugest fan of the airy feeling that rushed through my stomach as I read over the pet name. He was just from Manchester, it was normal up there to call everything by casually affectionate little names. It didn’t mean anything at all. 

. . . . . 

“Livia!” Nick calls out when he sees me scanning over the faces at the entrance to the gallery. I smile instantly and make my way over, quickly falling into his arms as he rocks us for a second. “Haven’t seen you in an age!” 

“‘Ve been working, we can’t all piss about Monday to Friday.” I giggle, smiling wide as he murmurs something under his breath and plants a big kiss on my cheek. “Is everyone here?” 

I try not to look suspicious when I peak over around us, trying to pick a certain brunette from the crowd.

“Yeah, they’re just over there with Julia’s friend.” Nick points and I see him immediately. He’s dressed just as I expected - half gucci half grandpa sweaters. “I’m gonna get us drinks, meet you there?” 

“Mhmmm” I hum, breaking out of his hold and slipping through the crowds to our small group of friends. 

“Hi!” Julia smiles brightly. She hugs me quickly before stepping aside to give Eleanor and Theo their turns. They all whisper quiet ‘Missed yous’ in my ear as if I’ve been gone for years. 

“Hey,” Harry appears by my side as everyone else turns their attention to the front of the crowd where it looks like the artist is setting up to introduce the night. “How’ve you been?” 

“In the last four days?” I chuckle, “Good. Not been sleeping great, but I’ve got a lot of work done so that’s been great.” 

He nods approvingly. A smile tugs at his lips at the mention of sleep, almost like some secret inside joke we’ve managed to form between just the two of us. 

“Me neither. Jeff’s been buggin’ me what feels like every hour with deadlines.” I find myself squeezing his hand a little under his long coat sleeves so nobody can see. “Looking forward to just collapsing tonight, if I’m honest.” 

“Me too.” I smile tiredly, tonight had been a big ask come to think of it. I've had work piled up twice my height all week and even having worked day in and day out I’ve still only made a crack in the mountain of final edits and emails to respond to.

Harry squeezes my fingers back and our hands linger in each other's hold until Nick emerges beside us and the artist begins her speech. 

. . . . .

 The comfortable chatter surrounding the booth we’d taken up a few hours ago died down as the clock ticked later and later. We’d left the gallery a while ago now in favour of the after party at a pub down the road but by now the heavy scent of beers and various gin based concoctions were giving us all headaches. 

“I think I’m gonna call it a night guys,” Harry announces, a slew of groans following from the group. “Sorry, sorry! It’s been great but it’s getting late.” 

Julia and Theo move out the way to let him out the booth. He slides across the red cushion to stand, pulling his coat over himself as he sneaks a quick look at me. 

“I think I’m gonna head off too,” I smile, waiting for Eleanour to stand and let me out as another wave of complaints flooded me. “Sorry! I’ve got work and the tube’ll be hell any later.” 

“Well if Harry’s going too couldn’t he take you home?” Julia suggests, looking between the two of us as we now stand slightly away from each other. “You drove right?” 

“Yeah, I did.” Harry turns to smile at me, amused clearly by how our plan was being unknowingly encouraged by our friends. “C’mon, I’ll drive yeh.” 

I nod, biting back a smirk. We say our goodbyes and wave as we slip out the heavy pub doors out onto the road outside. It’s started to drizzle slightly and I resent choosing the jacket without a hood. 

“I’m just over here,” Harry points a little ways off. “Hurry, think it’s about to pour.” 

We walk quickly down the street and through a metal gate into a car park when there’s a loud rumble of thunder and immediately the rain thickens. 

“Fuck!” Harry laughs as he scrambles for his keys, we match each other's paces until we’re practically sprinting to his car in the far corner of the lot. The click of the locks sounds out and his lights flash red a second before we’re both pulling the doors open and throwing ourselves inside onto warm seats. 

We catch our breath, chests rising and falling with uneven pants before our laughter settles and Harry slots the keys into the ignition. 

. . . . . 

“Do you want anything to eat?” Harry asks as he closes his front door behind us and we kick out shoes off in his hall. “I think I have some takeout menus somewhere..” 

“I’m not really hungry, thanks though,” I cut off his search as he walks through to his kitchen and starts opening draws. “Kinda just wanna go to bed now.” 

He nods and rubs a hand under his eye in silent agreement of my exhaustion.

“I’ll make us a tea, meet you up there yeah?” He calls over his shoulder, having turned quickly to retrieve various packets from his cupboards. “Chamomile okay?” 

“Yeah chamomiles good,” I hover for a second in the archway leading into the kitchen, suddenly awkward to be alone in his house again. “Where um..where is it?” 

He looks over his shoulder at me, slightly confused. His eye brows unfurrow when I motion behind me. 

“Oh- just up the stairs and third room down the hall..on the left.” He smiles, turning back to the cupboard to look through his extensive mug collection. 

I nod to myself, spinning on my heel and making my way up his stairs. I’ve never gone beyond the downstairs of his house before and even then I stuck to the kitchen, dining room and lounge. It felt odd to suddenly have access to something as intimate as his bedroom, I try not to overthink things as I push open the third door I see.

The first thing I see is his large bed, there’s probably enough room for three people on it and there’s definitely enough pillows to go around. The room as a whole is tidy, whether it’s always like that or only organised so precisely for my visit, I don’t know, but the thought makes my stomach flutter. 

I walk up to the side of the bed with no charger on it’s table and set my bag down. We hadn’t talked about the logistics of our...arrangement, but I’d brought the basics to last me through the night. I plug my charger into the wall and take out my wash bag and a set of clothes to sleep in before sliding my bag under the table. I look around for a second. Somehow I hadn’t really thought through the fact that by the end of the night, I’d be in Harry’s bed. With Harry. In a completely platonic way with the only function to soothe our mutually crappy sleeping habits. 

I hear Harry walking up the stairs just as I slip into the un suit to wash up and get changed. He’s humming a song under his breath. The clink of mugs being set down is followed by wardrobe doors opening and closing and a light thud of clothes being thrown on the bed. 

I wait a few minutes to make sure I don’t walk in on him changing. Opening the door tentatively, I step out into the room in a large sweater and pajama shorts. Harry turns to look at me, he’s in the same t-shirt he wore last time and a pair of boxer shorts and the whole situation suddenly seems so amusing. After just one night of falling asleep on the sofa together, not having ever talked before, here we are standing at our most vulnerable about to cuddle in his bed together.

“Hi.” 

“Hey,” He nods, looking down at himself. “Hope this is okay...I don’t want to make you uncomfortable or-” 

“It’s fine,” I reassure him, “I didn’t really know what to wear either.” 

His eyes flicker down my body and he smiles back up at me. He motions to the bed and we both nod a little awkwardly before making our way over to our sides. I climb in and instantly let a small groan out as my body sinks into the mattress, the pillows and duvet feel almost like a cloud as I burrow under and pull my tea up to my lips. 

Harry chuckles from beside me, I peak over the mug to seem him grinning down from where he sits slightly taller in the bed.

“Sorry, you look comfy.” He laughs a little, 

“I am, your bed’s insane.” I set my mug down and turn to him, bouncing slightly to emphasise the quality of his mattress that probably cost more than a year of my rent. “I really should start earning millions, feel like it’d suit me.” 

He returns his tea to the bedside table and copies me, turning to face me with his legs crossed. 

“It definitely would.” He smiles, bouncing a little before I let out a yawn. “Tired?” 

“Exhausted.” I mumble, hand still covering half my face. Harry reaches behind him to turn to switch the lights above his headboard off before pulling the duvet back for us to slip under.

“C’mere,” Without hesitating, I shuffle back slightly until I can feel his chest behind me and an arm come up to rest around my hip. “‘This okay?” 

“Mhmmm,” I hum, “What about our teeth?”

“We’ll brush ‘em in the morning,” I nod, groaning again as all the aches in my body subside as I sink into his arms and the foam mattress. “You okay?” 

“Yeah,” I mumble, embarrassed to have let myself go so easily around him. “Your mattress is just unbelievable. Might have to make this a regular thing.” 

I speak before I think, mind clouded with sleep and my eyes already fighting to stay open. 

“That’s the plan, love.” 

. . . . . 

When I wake up, Harry’s arms are tight around my middle and his body’s like a furnace behind me. I vaguely recall pulling my sweater off in the night to cool down as I lay now only in a vest and shorts. I slept better than I have in months though, despite the warm breaths on my neck turning my cheeks flushed. 

The mix of Harry’s company and his safe haven of a mattress made for the perfect night sleep. I push back slightly into his chest and feel his arms tighten around me and a low murmur of his voice in my ear. The clock on my bedside table reads 6:30. It’s a Saturday and I can quite easily imagine spending the rest of my day - weekend even, exactly like this. 

I slip back to sleep for a little awhile before I’m woken up to a low groan behind me. Harry shifts slightly, burying his face in the base of my neck and squeezing around my waist again. He must still be half asleep to be this comfortable with me. 

I’m proven right when it takes another fifteen minutes for him to poke his head up over my shoulder and mumble: 

“Breakfast?” 

. . . . . 

Our routine works smoothly for weeks. After sleeping so well the first few times, it became a given that we’d pile into Harry’s car after every night out with our friends and go back to his. Sometimes we’d get takeout or watch a film, but it wasn’t so rare that we’d just stumble out of his car, or a taxi - depending what the night had entailed, and walk with eyes almost closed straight to bed. 

I stopped bringing things every night about two weeks in when a new toothbrush appeared next to Harrys and an oversized t-shirt of Harrys found its way onto my side of the bed. We also ditched the awkward pleasantries. Spending two or three nights a week in his house, I’d become pretty familiar with it all. I sometimes brought us breakfast if it was a weekend, or left a coffee beside the bed for him if I left for work first, We had very easily slipped into an oddly familiar sense of domesticity. It was strange to never mention any of it to our friends, it made it special though. We helped each other, and it was all just between the two of us. Nobody else knew Harry taught me how to make coffee just the way he likes it, or that we share his lavender shampoo sometimes. 

“Ols?” Harry calls up the stairs to me. We’re running late to Julia and Theos anniversary dinner. 

“Coming!” I yell back, reaching into his wardrobe to snatch a jacket before running down the stares. 

“Oi! Slow down love, you’re gonna fall,” He complains, holding his hands out at the bottom of the stairs to catch me as I skid a little on the wooden floors of his hallway. “Hey! This’s mine!” 

He tugs playfully on the opening of his jacket. I pull the fabric from his grasp and smile up at him. 

“Not anymore…” He scrunches his nose up and pulls me towards him. The sudden movement pushed the air from my lungs suddenly. “-Fine! Just for tonight...nobody’ll notice anyway, you only just got his one.” 

He shakes his head, bringing his fingers up to tickles across my stomach quickly before letting me go and clapping his hands. 

“Shoes now!” He points down at my sock clad feet, “Come on we’re late already.” 

I sling my bag over my shoulder and slip my boots on before trailing after him to the front door. He’s pulled his large green coat off the hangar before he’s looking back down at me, brows pulled together in confusion. 

“What’ve got yeh bag for?” 

“Ah see Harry, I tend not to leave my stuff places I don’t actually live.” I laugh.

“You’re not coming back tonight?” The confusion’s not joined by a hint of sadness as his hands fall from the door knob and he turns to face front on. 

“Oh I..hadn’t thought ‘bout that. I’ve gotta water my plants.” I haven't been home in two days, I spent the whole day at Blondies yesterday then headed to Harry's after a few drinks with him and Nick. We’ve hung out around his house all day, sleeping in and finishing our last few bits of work for the week. “I can let them go a little dry I guess-” 

“Can I come to yours?” Harry cuts me off to ask. “It’s just, I haven’t ever seen it..and that way your plant’ll be fine.” 

I stay quiet for a second. Our world of sleepovers and movie marathons and home made curries for dinner existed within his house. My flat was small in comparisons to the homes of our friends, who were all, delicately put, pretty well off. Not that I wasn’t, I’d just gone into a lower paying area of my industry. I lived alone anyway so there wasn’t much point paying thousands in rent when I didn’t need much space. 

“It’s fine it you want a night to yourself I can just-” 

“It’s not that, H, I just didn't really think about how we only ever come here.” I mumble the last part, “Come back to mine, I don’t feel like going back on my own anyways.” 

I smile a little, unsure of where we stand on the whole admitting we’d grown pretty dependent on each other’s presence, front. He smiles back, twisting the door open and holding it for me as I slip under his arm. 

The car clicks unlocked and I settle into my seat. I reach over to push my seat belt in as Harry pulls his door shut and the car rumbles to a start. 

“Can’t believe Jules and T have been together so long.” He sighs as we pull out onto the main road. 

“Tell me about it,” I gaze out the window as rain dribbles lightly. “Feels like the year just went straight by.”

“They seem so happy still, like they’re still honeymooning,” Harry hums. 

“I remember when they just started going out in Uni, even then it was obvious they’d end up together.” 

“I like those kinds of people. The ones who make each other just completely themselves, ya know?” He glances over at me before turning back to the road. 

“Yeah...they’re proper soulmates aren’t they.” 

. . . . . 

“Okay but seriously, what the fuck is up with you and Harry?” Eleanor bursts out as soon as we reach the bar. We’ve been sent off to get the third round whilst the others stayed at our favourite booth of the pub we frequented. 

“Wait what?” I yell over the loud chatter of the pub, “What do you mean?” 

“You know what I mean!” She’s still waving her hand out for the bartender when she glances down at me again. “You’re tryna say you’re suddenly so close and nothing’s happened between you?” 

“We’re not that close.” I quip, “We’ve just talked a bit more lately, I guess.”

“And nothing’s happened?”  She raised a brow at me suspiciously. “You guys have left together every night for the past few weeks, just admit you have feelings for each other.” 

“No, nothing’s happened.” I sigh, unsure if I sound convincing or not. “We just live close and it’s too cold now to get the tube back so late, he’s just being nice. You know Harry...he’s like that with everyone.” 

Eleanor laughs a little, shaking her head. She places our order with the bartender when he makes his way to our side of the bar before turning back to me with her arms crossed. 

“He’s nice to everyone, but he’s not just being nice to you.” She smirks, “And he usually doesn't give just anybody his clothes.” 

She reaches out and rubs the fabric of my - Harrys - jacket between her thumb and forefinger. She looks up and quirks her brows up a little again. Before I can splutter out an explanation our drinks are being laid out on the counter beside us and Eleanor is pointing to the ones for me to carry and turning back to our booth. 

A surge of anxiety washes over me as I follow Eleanor back to the group. My breaths feel unsteady and I can’t help but dart my eyes to get a quick glance at Harry to see if he’s experiencing the same kind of interrogation. He seems fine though, laughing at something Nicks said. 

Soon we’re at the booth, slipping back into our seats and setting the drinks out in front of everyone. Harry’s eyes hover on me for a few seconds, brows raised a little in question. I smile and shake my head - everything’s fine. 

I don’t miss how Eleanor glances between us throughout the whole night. Especially not when a different two get up for the next round and Harry and I are pushed next to each other when they climb back into the available seats. Harry seems a little suspicious too. He clearly hasn’t noticed Eleanor’s strange behaviour - or doesn’t care - because he’s kept gazing down at me every now and then since we came back with drinks hours ago. When I stop looking up at him, nervous Eleanor might question me about his constant and slightly nervous glances when we’re alone, he reaches his hand under the tables and pulls mine into his lap. He squeezes our hands every now and then. He’s always a touchy, cuddly drunk. Normally it’s a bit more obvious; he’ll wrap his arms around one of us on the dance floor or lap his head on a shoulder, nothing too intimate. Just friendly. But now he’s stroking his thumb over my knuckles and tapping out the beat of the current song playing with his foot, his knee bumping mine. 

Julia and Theo are the first to go. Relief settles in me at the idea of not being the first two to leave for once. There’s no way Eleanor wouldn't’ve have noticed me and Harry sneaking the other a glance like we usually do to signal we’re ready to go, without some kind of distraction. 

“It was so lovely guys, feels like we haven’t just sat down and talked in so long!” Julia smiles, leaning into Theos side tiredly as they say their goodbyes. 

“I think I’m gonna head off too, it’s getting pretty late,” I smile, waiting for Harry to speak when Theo pipes up before him. 

“Livs, you want a lift?” Theo looks down at me. 

“Oh Olivia, that’s a good idea, you were just saying how it’s too cold for the tube.” Eleanor beams, smiling cheekily as she knows I’m the only one who’ll understand her subtle teasing. 

“Oh I-” I stutter before Harry’s squeezing my hand again and looks up at Theo. 

“I was actually gonna take her home, we’re only 10 minutes apart so it’s just easier.” He smiles politely, if I couldn’t feel his foot hooking over mine I’d believe he was just being nice and helping out a friend. 

“Yeah but you’re gonna stay a little while aren’t you?” Julia countered, “We’re pretty close, it’s fine really.” 

I nod, motioning to slide out of the booth. Harry lets me by, dropping my hand before anyone else could see. Julia, Theo and I say goodbye quickly and head out to the car park. As soon as we’re all strapped into their car, I pull out my phone and click Harry’s contact. 

Me 

Meet me at mine x

Harry 

Okay - what was that about? 

Me 

I’ll explain when u get here, just something w Eleanor

U might have been right about the jacket :/ 

Theo pulls up outside my flat and I jump out the car, thanking them quickly and waving them off. I climb the stairs of my building and click the keys in my door, pushing it open and kicking my shoes off the second I get in. After a fifteen minute frantic clean, the place is looking slightly better. There’s no time to perfect it as I hear my phone buzzing on the counter, a dorky photo of Harry in one of his infamous sweaters all sprawled out on the sofa and sticking his tongue out at me flashes the screen. 

“Hello?” 

“Hey, I’m just outside,” He talks softly, “What number are you?” 

“24, wait a sec and I’ll buzz you up.” 

I tread quickly to the button by my front door and let him up, hearing a quiet thanks over the phone and a “See you in a sec”  before the line goes dead. 

A minute later there’s a quiet knock at my door. I open it and see Harry, he looks a little more tired than when I left him forty minutes ago, he rubs his knuckles under his eyes and sighs softly. 

“Hey, come in.” I pull the door a little wider, stepping aside to let him inside. He walks past me, eyes watching the floor whilst I lock the up behind us and turn to face him. There's an awkward tension in the air that I haven’t experienced with Harry before, maybe a little that first night when I walked in on him in his kitchen, but nothing like this since we’ve gotten closer.  

“What happened?” He asks quietly, lifting his head with an uncertain look on his face.”You barely even looked at me. 

“I..” I stumble over what to say, I’ve been thinking I could just explain what Eleanor had said and have it done with but now I know we’re not going to be able to just leave this. If somebody’s going to find out about our arrangement then something would have to change. “Ellie thinks there’s something going on with us and she kept staring all night. I just, I couldn’t give her anything to be suspicious about.” 

“S’that what you mean about the jacket?” I nod, “What did she say?” 

“Just that we seemed closer, talk more I guess.” I sigh, “She didn’t believe anything I said.” 

“What did you say?” He presses. His tone is unclear, he seems less hurt now and more focussed on getting answers from me. 

“I just, I told her nothing’s happened.” I mumble, “She asked about us leaving together and I told her it was just because we lived close and it’s easier than the tube.” 

Harry bobs his head a little, taking in what I’ve just told him before laughing a little. He shakes his head and brings his palms up to his face, cursing under his breath. We stand in the quiet of my hallway before he speaks up again.

“Can we still do this?” That catches me off guard. Of course I knew we’d have to stop sometime when one of us started dating or a friend found out, I just hadn’t thought seriously about it happening anytime soon. “If she does find out, would that be the worst thing in the world?”

I shake my head, taking a step towards him to close the gap between us that’d been building my nerves throughout this whole exchange. 

“I don’t wanna stop hanging out.” I confess. Harry quirks his lips up a little, obviously relieved as he pulls me to his chest. He wraps his arms around my shoulders and rests his chin on my head as we breathe together for a moment. All the while we’ve been spending nights at his, there’s been no serious moments like this. We’ve opened up about vulnerable subjects and confessed more than we probably should have to each other, but never anything like this. There’d never been a  time I thought I could lose him. 

“What if something did happen.” He whispers into my hair. 

“Like what?” I murmur, voice a little muffled by his jacket. 

“Like..” He trails off a little and I’m pretty sure I hear him inhale a little and smell my hair. “Like what if I kissed you..or something.” 

“Or something?” My chest tightens, stomach fluttering suddenly. 

“Mmhhhmm,” He hums, “What would happen then?” 

“Eleanor would have a field day.” 

Harry laughs, shoulders shaking a little as he giggles above me. He loosens his grip on my and pushes away to create a little space to see me again. 

“Oh yeah?” He teases. 

“Uh huh,” I smile, “She’d never let us forget it if she knew she was right.” 

“And what would she be right about?” Harry lifts his hand to cup my face, tilting it slightly to make sure I’m staring right up at him. 

“..Something..happening.” I whisper, “Having feelings for eachother.” 

Harry grins, cheeks a soft rosy between the outside cold and the new blush. He strokes the pad of his thumb against my cheek and beams down at me. 

“Oh yeah?” 

“Uh huh…” 

“Really..she’d be right about that?” 

“I’m pretty sure-” 

Before I can tease anymore, Harry’s leaning down to press his lips against mine. I inhale sharply, closing my eyes and looping my arms around the back of his neck to hold us in place. His hand still holds my face firmly, thumb fluttering over my cheek a couple times before he pulls away and we both breathe in deep. 

“She’s definitely right.” He smiles, tone turning serious for a moment. “I really like you Olivia.” 

Butterflies surge through my stomach for the millionth time since he walked through my door. Blushing and happy, I tighten my arms and push my face back into his shoulder. 

“I like you too H….just a little bit.” 

“We don’t have to tell anyone, just want this to be ours for a little while.” I can hear the smile in his voice as he leans back down to whisper into my ear. 

“I want this to be ours forever.” I hum, words quiet and part of me hoping he doesn't hear my honest confession. 

A comforting quiet settles over us. I remember how tired I really am as I melt further into Harry’s body, breathing in the sweet cinnamon and vanilla scent. His breathing lulls me half to sleep as I let my eyes flutter shut and bury my head further into his neck. I feel him lifting me up as my body relaxes against his and I catch his last few words before I he’s shifting me into his arms and walking us up the stairs. 

“I could hold you ‘n listen to your voice all night long, love.” 

. . . . .    

“Oh my god!” Julia yells out, unravelling a long shawl from pristine white tissue paper. “Okay whoever got me, thank you so much!” 

She continues to squeal a little as he wraps it over her shoulders and presses the end to her nose, inhaling the lavender scent of her favourite designer brand. 

I’d only spent one Christmas with the whole group before but it was clear secret Santa was a bit of a tradition. Between the six of us we all had other friends, family and mostly, relationships. Organising a secret santa within our group just relieved some of the stress of present buying - and it was fun. 

We’re all sitting around Harry’s living room, it felt the homiest  to us after all. The kiddy advent calendar I bought for him hung by the fireplace reading December 21st. We’ve all finished our egg nogs, meaning it was officially present time. Over the next few days we’ll all be driving up and down the country to visit family, meaning today’s the last day most of us will be seeing each other. Harry had whined about me leaving, begging me to stay another day with him or better yet - spend christmas with his family up north. 

It was when I told him my own parents were spending the holidays visiting my sister and her kids in New York that his campaign started. We kissed almost three months ago now and have been on a slew of dates since. Between all the secret dinners out, brunches and farmers market trips, we haven’t found time for the talk. We had no official title. I’ve heard Harry refer to me as “m’girl” a couple times when I’ve wandered into the kitchen and overheard him on the phone to mitch, but nothing he’s told me himself. Despite this, he still insists I have to come and spend christmas with him and his close family. The idea of me hanging out with my young cousins and distant relatives apparently doesn’t satisfy him. 

“Are you serious!” Eleanor gasps as she unwraps her own present. Everyone had picked the perfect gifts for each other this year. In a pure coincidence, I ended up with Harry’s name after Nick made me trade because he’d already bought Julia’s present for her. I’ve been nervous about it all evening, I was sure he’d like it, a little too sure. That was the problem. One night, wrapped up in Harry’s bed, he’d recalled his latest tragedy to me: He’d taken shroom with Mitch on his last trip to LA and subsequently decided to skinny dip in the sea, losing his favourite mustard cords in the process. The only times we’ve seen everyone else has been with the both of us present and , to my knowledge, he hasn’t mentioned this to anyone else. The brown paper package that sat on the coffee table could invite a few more questions that I was prepared to answer. 

“Harry, you’re next!” Ellie grinned, hugging her present to her chest. 

Thanks to our early secrecy, there’s been no opportunity to tell our friends we were dating. Eleanor hasn’t stopped her constant questioning but we’ve kept up a pretty good front of excuses. It was still freezing out so it made sense for us both to climb into his car together at the end of the night. Nobody had to know we would be going home to the same house where we’d climb into the same heavenly bed and scramble eggs together in the morning. 

“I’m going, I’m going!” Harry laughs as Ellie tries to hurry him up, playing perfectly into her role as the youngest in our group. 

He pulls the first fold of paper back with his ringed fingers and immediately looks up at me as the mustard fabric shines up at him. He grins wide, beaming back at me before pulling the rest of the paper back and laying the trousers out in front of him. 

“No babe...where did you find them?” He’s running his fingers down the cord, in awe to have his favorite trousers back - or at least a copy. 

I don’t miss how Eleanor and Nick’s heads turn to share a look of shock as the pet name tumbles out. Before I can put anything together, Harry’s standing and leaning over the coffee table. He wraps his arms around my shoulders, pulling me into a hug and whispering his thanks in my ear. 

“Wait I dont - how did you know it was h-” Julia pipes up, before she can finish she’s cut off by the joint gasps of Nick and Ellie as Harry plants a wet kiss to my cheek - then my lips, and laughs at our friends reaction. 

“I knew it!” Ellie yells, pointing frantically between the two of us, Harry now having stepped over the table and come to sit next to me, pulling me into his side.

“What was-” Julia stammers, “Since when!” 

Harry’s eyes flutter down to my face. He giggles quietly when he catches on to my glare. This wasn’t exactly how I’d imagined the evening going. 

“Have you just been lying to my face for the past three months?” Ellie asks, crossing her arms over her chest and pouting her lips. 

“Five,” Harry mumbles, almost just as an inside joke for the both of us to enjoy. I slap my hand against his shoulder to shut him up but the damage is already done. 

“Five months!” Even Theo’s joining in now. “How didn’t we know?” 

“It didn’t start out like this honestly, we would’ve told you.” I try and explain, eager for this to quiet down so we could get to the roast dinner waiting for us in the oven. 

“How did it start?” Nick pokes, drawing Julia and Ellie’s attention as the same puzzled expressions adorn their faces. 

“Unimportant,” Harry brushes off, standing up to tower over us all and reaching a hand back for my own. “We better get dinner, we wouldn't want burnt potatoes.” 

Harry pulls on my arm gently, leading me out the room before anyone can object. 

In the kitchen, he picks up a tea towel and starts to check on the food, prodding at the parsnips. I roll my eyes as he ties his lavender apron around his waist and tentatively pulls the potato tray from the oven. 

“Harry..” I sigh, trying not to laugh as he turn to face me, spatula in hand. 

“Yes dear?”  

“What was that?” 

“Oh - You’ve gotta shimmy a little spatula under the potatoes or they’ll break apart-” 

“No, obviously not that,” He makes it so hard so stay stern, a giggle leaks out as he lifts a hand to rest on his hip. “Why did you do that?” 

“I want them to know.” drops his utensils, tone sincere as he takes another step towards me. “I want our friends to know how much I love you already, and you remember about my mustard cords so..it felt like the perfect time.” 

“What?” I stutter, looking up at him from where he’s pulled me into his chest. His hands rest on my waist, rings a little hold against my exposed skin. 

“You remembered the trousers I lost last month in LA -”

“You love me?” 

His eyes go a little wide, a smile peaking through as the sides of his mouth quirk upwards. Realising what he just said, he lifts a hand from my waist to rest it against my face and lean down a little. 

“Of course I love you.” He whispers, his voice a little croaky and I can see tiny droplets gathering in his eyes that make my heart flutter. 

“Love you too..” I mumble. I wipe a thumb over his cheek before pulling him down into a kiss. I feel his smile against my own, and everything’s perfect for just a second. 

“So you’ll come to Christmas with me?” 

. . . . .

Hiii I hate the ending :)

Tysm for reading !! pls leave a like or reblog (it rlly helps <3) if you enjoyed it x

[elichorph]

OH SHIT???? did you see avery jeong buying princess bandaids at the local cvs after punching out somebody’s car window??? anyways, he’s a legacy and a member of the yale's elite, they're twenty-three and a 1st year grad student majoring in mechanical engineering. they are as strong willed as they are naive.

hello, i am back with my third character. yes this is my second character that has a 5 letter name that starts with an a. yes this intro is extremely long. if you read it i will send you a gif of your fav celeb to thank you.

stats:

full name: avery tobias jeong nicknames: ave age: twenty three birthday: march 8, 1998 ( yeah he’s technically 22 right now but he’ll be 23 soon enough ) chart: pisces sun, aries moon, cancer rising siblings: one ( lilia, younger sister ) gender: cis male pronouns: he / him sexuality: bisexual & biromantic height: 6′0 hair color: black tattoos: random tattoos on his arms, faded hand tattoos (specifically an angel on his left hand) piercings: right earlobe ring

blackmail:

( violence & drugs tw )

he had an unplanned child at nineteen with his ex-girlfriend who he now has little to no contact with. his ex dug up a public intoxication charge that avery’s family had paid to cover up in order to place a restraining order on him and deny him custody of the child.

he was involved in an underground fighting ring for multiple years as a means to make money after being cut off by his family. however, he always took fights too far and was banned from the ring in new haven after he nearly killed one of his opponents.

family:

if you’ve already read lilia’s intro then you can skip this because it’s the same thing!

ya’ll ever read one of those drug ring ao3 fanfics where y/n is dating the sexy drug cartel leader? well that’s their family!

generational family blood money because that’s how cartels work i think. started running + dealing three generations back with their great-grandparents in order for them to make a living. it wasn’t until the so-called business was handed down to their grandparents that they wanted to expand and generate more money. the big pharma cover was created in order for them to manufacture, distribute, and supply at a larger scale. present day, their family name has notoriety with other cartel and mafia families. 

basically avery was supposed to take over because he was the oldest right, but lilia did not want that at all. their parents started favoring avery and schmoozing up to him a little bit to get him to say yes (even though avery was fully prepared to give lilia the position) and lilia was like! what the fuck! so she told their parents about this one time that avery accidentally blabbed the family secret to a stranger at a party which broke their one rule of keeping it a secret. their parents wanted nothing to do with him anymore and completely cut avery off and kicked him out of the family. 

everyone knows that avery and lilia are siblings, even though they don’t really know the actual details about their past together because avery doesn’t say anything about his family and the cartel is a secret. now that they are both at yale and in the elites together they are just kinda like haha awkward <3 they basically would just tell everyone that they grew apart if other characters tried to pry but also lilia is now telling people that avery fucked up a business decision which is why he left the family and avery is like alright but good luck trying to get other info out of them! xo, the jeongs

present:

after being kicked out of his family, avery booked it to new haven to attend yale. he was able to score a full ride after graduating as the valedictorian of a specialized school for science in nyc and for continuously staying near if not at the top of his class. literally this man is a casual genius. he will get drunk as hell and talk about math for the entire night even if you don’t care. avery joined the elites in his junior year and even though he technically is a legacy from his family, he told them that if he was going to join, he wanted to be recruited for his academics because fuck if he was going to use his family name!

to expand a little more on blackmails, avery was broke as shit after coming to new haven. he still is, but he literally had so little money to his name and eventually found an underground fighting ring and made money by winning matches through that because he is Beefy and a Unit and his anger issues could be released <3 but he would always go a little too hard and would near murk his opponents, especially this one time that caused him to be banned from the ring. now for money he just fixes up people’s air conditioners and fridges and shit and also works maintenance at a hotel chain around connecticut to get money when he really needs it <3 literally if you need something fixed hit him up and he’ll be happy to do it but he would also love if you made him dinner to thank him because he has eaten too much kraft mac n cheese.

when avery was a sophomore, his girlfriend of a few months accidentally got pregnant whoops <3 and he was ready to literally drop everything for his girlfriend and daughter, but his girlfriend didn’t want that because she was lowkey a bitch! she ended up using a secret that avery had told her (that he had a public intoxication charge that his family had covered up) and took him to court and got his custody rights taken away and a restraining order placed on him and then dropped out of yale before anybody could know about the baby and zoomed to another state and now avery is like ok <3 his daughter’s name is skye though and she is four now and sometimes he still gets updates but literally it eats him alive hahaha

personality:

basically paddington going through an emo phase. he has extreme rbf and might be a solid unit who looks intimidating, but he genuinely is so sweet. by his looks you’d expect him to push you down the stairs but in reality he’s the kid who is 20 minutes late to class to hold the door open for people and he’ll feel good about it even if nobody says thank you to him. 

certified sad boy! the extremely nice guy you meet at a house party who remembers what drink you like from some time you apparently met three months ago? avery loves house parties for real and will be the angel who cleans up at 5am even if he’s got an exam at 8. he loves to take care of people to fill his fatherly void even though he’s the one that needs help the most. 

accepts the fact that he’s now #poor now, but he also gets kind of insecure and jealous seeing everybody pop off with a britney work bitch vc bugatti. tries to keep up with people looks wise at least, he has one old balenciaga cross body bag that has holes in it, way too many ripped pairs of designer jeans, and a scratched gucci belt that you will see him sporting often. might want to bash your face in if you flaunt your wealth and gets kind of whiny about it sometimes.

avery is the type of person that loves the outdoors and going on picnics. his romantic dream is to lay under a tree with the soft summer breeze and play some guitar for the love of his life <3 yes he has a guitar and yes he is actually good at singing even though he gets embarrassed about it. he fucking loves music.

still has that aries moon though, is extremely defensive and my one character who will actually fight in the group chat because what the fuck does he have to lose at this point! avery has extreme anger issues that hurt him more than anything. even though he’s banned from the underground fighting ring, he still needs an outlet and will have his hands shoved in his pockets because they’re either bruised to shit or discolored from how many times they have been bruised. can be found walking home after taking the late bus so he could go scream in a field somewhere.

this man? also naive as fuck. has been hurt by too many people and really just sets him up at this point. an open book most of the time, so much that it hurts him. will tell you everything about himself like the way he can’t sleep in silence and has to have ocean noises playing, but he can’t listen to whale noises because sometimes he wakes up in the middle of the night and thinks it’s a ghost. however, his family stuff is off limits and he will spit in your face if you even think about asking him about it. 

won’t hold grudges. the type to see a person for who they are as a whole and if they mess up, he’s just like “you’re better than that /: but it’s fine.” probably why he gets hurt so much

wanted connections

a roommate maybe? i pictured him living in an apartment because he probably wouldn’t be able afford live anywhere else. could be besties, could be someone he barely knows but he just needed someone to move in to split the rent.

the one person who he’ll let take care of him. it probably would take a lot to break through his walls, but this person can calm him down after he gets riled up.

since his ex went to yale, maybe one person who knew her and had somewhat of an idea of what happened. they don’t know everything but maybe from what they heard from his ex, they believe everything was avery’s fault and that he fucked her over entirely.

gut wrenching hate plots of where they really love each other but things just can’t work out for one way or another.

gentle romance <3 slow burn. someone who won’t hurt him PLEASE.

aaaaand someone who takes advantage of how naive he is

and friends. so many friends. he is just so friendly and he isn’t the type to hold shit over people’s heads. 

other links 

pinterest

[ink-beneath-her-fingernails]

BNHA/MHA First Watch-Through Notes

1x01

these are... stupid... and... a mess. bc I am stupid and a mess. you have had your warning. I didn’t even go back and skim through this when I was done I’m just releasing these little bastard thoughts into the void they’re not my problem now

I’m watching dubbed btw

I know, I know... it’s the only one I have access to rn tho

I... do not know how to feel about funimation’s new intro?

well I guess it’s not really new but

listen I haven’t watched anything of funimation’s since the og fruits basket ok I’m used to the DUN-DUN *funimation* ((....you should be watching))

he is. babie. green babie.

but also why do these small children have such wild hair colors

I mean I’m here for it

I just wasn’t expecting it

oH SHIT THEY GOT POWERS POWERS

so this is the famous deku

I’m guessing this is like a flashback or memory or something?

I missed the bully’s name

speaking of the bullies, they changed order? It was wings, fire, stretchy hands, but now it’s fire, stretchy hands, wings. I know that they probably wanted to show the “leader” closest and that’s why but,,

also wtf?? these are kids. like bullies should not be a thing, I think we can all agree on that, but yeah, it’s gonna happen. but these kids are, what? eight? nine? maybe their powers (’quirks,’ whatever) aren’t super powerful yet, but this blonde kid has fire powers. has nobody talked to them about just how dangerous this is? forget roughing the other two up or intimidating them or giving them a hard time, this could genuinely escalate and get way out of hand super fast, and someone could get seriously injured.

oof. boy is dead.

this eight year old (purple hair) sounds like he’s a thirty yo new teacher trying to sound hip and cool but also wise and knowing to his class who Does Not Care

OH

that wasn’t purple kid?? that was current deku???

wack

then this fourteen year old sounds like he’s a thirty yo new teacher trying to sound hip and cool but also wise and knowing to his class who Does Not Care

also they were four?

jeepers heckin criminey who starts beating people up at four years old

have to say though, I loved that sky-to-puddle transition

jiminey fucking crickets I’m not even a minute into the episode these notes are going to be stupidly long I’m sorry

!! I love his little skipping-dance thing when he’s impatient at the crosswalk!

alright... I’ll admit it... his character design is pretty adorable

also tf is that thing

it looks half shark half poorly drawn dog

I mean I get it’s probably a person and that’s their quirk or whatever but

did this kid just run all the way across the city just to watch this guy start shit at the station so he could see the heroes take him down??

I mean respect tbh but also priorities kid

also I really appreciate that the cops are just kind of calmly directing everyone and everyone else is just kind of chillin like “oh. another villain. that’s too bad.” like tbh that’s one of the things that always kind of annoys me about movies and shows like this where there’s like repeatedly villain attacks because yes they are scary, especially when you’re caught up in them, but if you’re just kind of there and not directly in the action or being directly threatened, then why are you freaking out? you’ve lived in this city for how long? there’s an attack every, what, two days? this isn’t routine for you by now?

I started this like 15 min ago and am only like a minute and a half into the ep smh

ngl this intro kinda pops off

that hero guy seemed... kind of evil lookin tho

love the animation oml

also the lyrics to this are great???

OH IS THAT A NARRATIVE FOIL I SEE IMPLIED THERE

I THINK IT IS

“and they were narrative foils” “oh my god they were narrative foils”

k ngl rewinding real quick bc I missed some of the intro and there’s always so much fun stuff to see and unpack in those

also I wanna read all the lyrics

k so I was wondering this before but I’m just gonna say it... why does the hero guy have rabbit ears

alright character designs lookin p fire so far

last guy I keep missing but he kind of looks like steven universe?? idk I still have to watch that show too tbh so,,,

does the big hero guy turn into a giant bird?

oh that intro got me excited for this

these characters look so lit!!

“the first incident?” so this isn’t just like a natural factor of their world? it hasn’t always been going on? there was, like, a definitive start to it all? was that kid really the first incident or the first one they noticed? was that actually the first incident or is it just like the commonly told first incident, like an old myth/legend/folktale/old wive’s tale?

interesting that it started with a baby and then moved to people of all ages?

oh they don’t know the cause of the quirks? interesting

((why do I feel like finding out the answer to that is gonna be like A Big Thing™ at some point in the series))

I really like the visuals they put with this exposition?? idk why it’s just,,, very appealing

also his voice is very nice to listen to tbh, so that’s a definite plus

I hate it when the main character’s voice is super annoying

but like how long ago was it that this started? he just said “before long”

I like that in this universe they actually acknowledge that hey comic books are a thing and this whole superheroes/villains/powers thing is kind of ridiculous bc it’s legit like playing out scenes straight from those comic books but also this is real life and it’s actually happening and really does pose a lot of danger and complications to a lot of people, so we’re going to treat it as something real and serious and affecting us

I might’ve spoken too soon but I really hope they don’t blow that mindset

I feel like too often superhero shows/movies just either completely gloss over the effects this stuff has on society as a whole, or it’s like a completely new thing for them, like there’s never been the concept of a fictional superhero or a comic book there before.

“was an age of heroes”??? oh no what happens

k but why is this guy dressed like the ‘do not cross’ lines

kind of a lame hero costume tbh :/

why. does he have. sleeves. but no shirt.

edna mode would never do you like that honey go see her

“Death Arms”?? what kind of alias is that?? also wouldn’t it make more sense for arms to be uncovered than his chest, then??

“The Punching Hero”

I’m sorry I Cannot take this guy seriously

waterbending??

asdkfdls idk why but this firehose guy really reminds me of that one alchemist from fmab with the top hat and the monocle and the peg leg that spun like a top and Scar murked

“rescue specialist” see?? that makes sense!! it makes me so happy that they’re actually thinking more about the worldbuilding and how dangerous scenarios would work if 80% of the population had powers of different kinds, beyond “big bad guy meet big good guy. punch punch good guy wins”

also dear god thank you for putting someone on crowd control I know I was just saying it was great these people weren’t really treating this like the end of the world and it is good that they were mostly staying back by themselves but. they were still standing very close to an ongoing fight. priorities, people. self preservation. they are things. that I do not believe most people in superhero universes have in the slightest.

aww he’s too short

(but is he shorter than edward elric)

((do we know))

(((somebody please tell me if this information is available)))

alsdfkj l;a that guy calling in late bc the train got held up by the villain... do you think that’s another equivalent of “oh...I’m...sick... yeah, totally, I’m sick” and “my dog ate my homework” to them? “there was a villain attack” or “some idiot on my block decided to show off their quirk and it got out of hand”

ope Big Hero™ is here

...why am I surprised that they have fans?? I mean I guess that makes sense they’re basically celebrities and public figures right?

okay Big Hero™ is Kamui got it

wait no that is not the Big Hero™

but they are another hero and their name is Kamui got it

“Kamui Woods” ok that’s actually helpful I was gonna ask what his skin was supposed to be bc I didn’t think it was scales and it does look kind of like bark... Now going to take that as permission to assume it’s the latter

kamui kind of reminds me of some pokemon but I’m not sure which one?? I’m sorry idk pokemon v well but thy def remind me of one of them

“...a fAnBOY” he looks and sounds like he just tricked someone into confessing to murder why is he so smug about that smh

you know what. speaking of. I don’t get why everyone views being a fan of something/someone as something to be embarrassed or ashamed about?? why do people make fun of other people for it? why do we treat it like some big dark secret we try to hide? when did liking something become a bad thing? like?? sorry I have hobbies and interests and you don’t? sorry I think this person is talented? sorry I thought this book was life-changing? sorry I listen to this album so much because it’s good? sorry this show made me laugh during a really rough time? like goddamn it’s nobody’s business what you like unless you’re trying to force it on you when you’ve asked them to stop or it’s hurting someone? if they’re being safe and respectful about it for everyone involved then there shouldn’t be a problem? stop making people feel like freaks or be scared to enjoy something just a little too much? just let people have good things in life and consume the media that makes them happy? it has little to no effect on you? I don’t get why it’s you’re problem?? sorry to get all soapboxy this is something that’s always really annoyed me

does kamui have flowers on their belt

icon

k but isn’t wood like... really easy to break tho

I mean... comparatively speaking?

“illegal use of powers during rush hour traffic” alsfjsadlkf

wait so he’s listing charges for the guy, does that mean heroes are officially licensed here and can actually arrest people? and... actually work with law enforcement?? gasp no wait but I thought that was impossible except for The One Officer On The Inside That The Hero Has Convinced Of Their Cause™

hold up... “assault, robbery, and illegal use of powers during rush hour traffic... you are the incarnation of evil” ...bro chill lmao

I mean those aren’t good things but,,,, buddy “evil” can get so much worse holy shit sunflower child has no idea what’s in store for them

the show can do a hell of a lot even if they decide not to go that dark

well deku did say he was new

also off topic but I just looked it up and DEKU IS HALF A FOOT TALLER THAN ED

I’M SORRY BUT THAT’S HILARIOUS

CAN YOU IMAGINE THIS EXCITED GREEN CHILD MEETING ED THE GREMLIN ELRIC AND JUST TOWERING OVER HIM

he’d probably get along well w al though so ed would have to like him anyways

ok but back to bnha

ope kamui just got upstaged

but honestly?? he was actin a lil cocky and she seems like a queen so I ain’t mad about it

oh great creeps are everywhere apparently

YES THANK YOU THEY NEED TO INCLUDE SUPERPOWERS IN LEGISLATION SOMEHOW OTHERWISE PEOPLE CAN GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING GEEZ

just. more worldbuilding that I appreciate.

jfc they muzzled him?

ok i wasn’t that mad about kamui being upstaged (idk why I kinda like the guy) but now she’s acting a little too cocky for me and I feel kind of bad for Death Arms and Backdraft (?) because they definitely do deserve at least a little credit

yes. official. overseen by the government. I’m not saying it’s necessarily a good idea bc I’m not getting into the whole mess the MCU basically did regarding that, but it really does add to the worldbuilding and making it seem more realistic/draw you in a little more because you can bet that would be a thing that would actually happen in some capacity if such a large percentage of the population had superpowers, and crime was at an all-time high at the same time, with normal methods without powers likely not doing much to combat that, and it being even harder because everyone’s is different

wow so they really do have roles similar to celebrities huh?

I actually love how he’s analyzing the new hero

that’s!! the good!!! nerdery!!!!

ngl thought that guy was gonna be like “well that’s never gonna happen” lmao glad he didn’t turn out to be an asshole

this guy’s hair and his sweater need an upgrade

I’m sorry honey it’s just not a Look™

I mean ngl I’d probably wear it but also I am the absolute last person to look to for a good idea of fashion so

wow we hate asshole teachers

this kid’s hair grows wtf

they seriously just break out their quirks when they get annoyed?? I mean me too probably but

oh wait he’s not totally an asshole

but that still is kind of a dick move because even if it seems really really likely that most of them do, a lot of them probably feel like that’s just what’s expected of them or that that’s their best bet at an ok life, or they don’t think they’ll actually be able to get a career as a hero, and he has to know that there are kids (or at least one) in his class who don’t have powers and who will probably be shut down at every turn on that career track??

also what is it with the absurd number of people whose hair grows/flys/whatever and whose hands change chape and/or elongate

the girl who just throws up the rock n roll sign is my favorite

also why does this teacher remind me of gilderoy lockhart

I get that his eye thing is part of his quirk... but does he face no consequences health-wise from putting his grubby fingers all over his eyeballs?? you don’t know where your hands have been

ah

the famed bakugo

we finally meet

you seem like a cocky asshole and if I remember correctly you have firepowers

you know who else seemed like cocky assholes and one point or another and had firepowers??

roy mustang and zuko

and one of those guys is an awkward, angry turtleduck, and the other one is a rightly smug bastard who succeeded in pulling a coup on the government who was surveilling him and holding half his team hostage

so yeah I have a feeling I’m gonna like this guy

probably

at some point

eventually

it might take a while

“the only place worthy of me” oh dear

All Might!! Big Hero™ has a name!!

oh being a hero solely bc you want to be rich and popular? lame

aklsdfsjaslkfd teach just callin deku out in front of everyone

r.i.p.

it was nice having you as a main character for eight whole minutes I’m sorry you have to face death-by-embarrassment you deserved better

ope

bakugo doesn’t want anyone stealin his thunder

lemme guess deku is also his Main Rival™ or at least will be

awwwww poor guy

how much you wanna bet he gets the highest scores in all the exams bc he studies the heroes so much and that’s how he gets in

that lady got forcefields for her quirk? damn she lucked out

“this cash is mine” *drops cash*

are all the heroes like fine mt. lady can deal w the guy she keeps stealing all our credit anyway so there’s no point??

....is that all might?

k but... y’all should be taking notes on the heroes too if you want a better chance at that career and better schools for it? I know they’re probably making fun of it bc he doesn’t have a quirk but still

also I find it really interesting that the kids all act like the quirks are absolutely everything but at that scene on the street earlier people were complaining about missing the days they didn’t have to worry about “every rando w a quirk” or something... like maybe it’s because the kids grew up w it? Idk just the difference in mindset between (presumably) generations seems cool to look into

wow we love bullies so much

no we don’t pls stop you’re not as cool as you think you are

DESTROYING SOMEONE’S NOTEBOOK/JOURNAL/SKETCHBOOK IS ONE OF THE MOST DICK MOVES SOMEONE CAN MAKE CHANGE MY MIND

alright bakugo you’ve definitely moved onto my shitlist for the moment

don’t stay there

well you know what they say about greatness... some people are destined for it, yeah, but some become it, and some have it thrust upon them

cliches are there for a reason buddy

and either way... I could be wrong but... there doesn’t seem like anything great or heroic about bullying people... I mean idk that’s just my opinion but

god I hope they eat bakugo alive at ua

deku I know you’re a sunshine child but you have to get in now. you have to. out of pure spite. please.

yeah, friend 1b is right buddy...

destroy him deku

DESTROY THEM DEKU

oh suicide jokes huh

bakugo you’re on thin fucking ice you’ve just moved way up in my shit list

wow I hate him <3

EXACTLY

THANK YOU DEKU

I hate it when shows have someone make a suicide joke like that and just? no one addresses it?? or the characters don’t seem to realize that it needs addressing, at least to themselves??? so this is refreshing

voiced my thoughts exactly

he really is an idiot

NO BUDDY YOUR DREAMS ARE STILL POSSIBLE AND VALID

YOUR NOTES ARE SALVAGEABLE

he really is a jerk deku you’re right

awww little deku is so cute

alright I’m gonna make a prediction

this is his mom right

is this gonna be

another

dead anime mom?

and lemme guess she always told him she was sure he’d be a hero/she knew he’d become one, and then she died, and that’s why he’s so set on it

probably not

but just... placing my bets now

w h a t  is this child doing

he’s a hair’s breadth away from head-desking

are we... just gonna... ignore that robbery that was happening on the street a few minutes ago

OKAY WE GET IT YOU’RE HERE CAN YOU GO BACK TO SAVING PEOPLE THEY’RE STILL IN DANGER

HIS CACKLES I CAN’T

alsdkjf;lsjk I feel bad for him but also,,, that transition was gold

but also the face his mom made before he started laughing... she knew he probably wouldn’t get one didn’t she

but why do they assume it won’t happen if they don’t get it by a certain age? they said after that baby people all around the world were getting powers, and showed people of all different ages when they said so. that implies that they got those powers at those ages, after the baby was born but not when they were children themselves? like yeah there’s probably some point where you’d consider them “aged out” and therefore less likely to get a quirk but... she just said he’s in kindergarten.

fourth generation? so the appearance of quirks isn’t a super recent thing then

they can tell if someone is going to manifest a quirk or is starting to by looking at x-rays?

also I know I’m seriously overusing the word “interesting” but

maybe I’m reading too far into this but it’s also kind of interesting that his father and his (current) main antagonist have such similar powers?

OH!!!! lore drop!! kind of!!! that’s a really interesting (wow there it is again) thing they chose to be an indicator for that kind of thing in this universe

*cue izuku contemplating chopping off his pinky toes*

I feel like... all might’s... not gonna be that great....

DEAR LORD HOW MANY TEARS CAN THIS CHILD HOLD IN HIS EYES

also ngl when little deku’s eyes are wide and he doesn’t move he looks really creepy and kind of like a child-sized doll

like pinocchio

how sure are we that deku isn’t made of wood

hmmmmmmmmm I do love this animation

ah Internal Angst™

the fuck is that laughter??

skin suit? no thanks

but guess we aren’t ignoring that earlier scene

yeah all might’s in the city alright

he’s gonna break this up isn’t he

yepppppp that’s him

idk I think alex louise armstrong did it better sorry bud :/

“texas smash”??

he just... punched liquid apart

this kid’s still gonna go flying and hit the ground hard buddy thanks for your help

oh he stuck around

and he’s not hurt too bad

“justicing”

he’s using the city’s sewer system being difficult to navigate as his excuse for why he wasn’t paying attention to keeping bystanders safe like he “usually” does?

the armstrongs do the sparkle better

a;ldkfsdlfls this is really funny to watch ngl

“that’s... a pretty good point.” yeah no shit lmao

I love how he’s just. awkwardly patting deku.

yeah he’s gonna end up accidentally adopting this kid isn’t he

is he hurt?? or did the other guy actually take him over while deku was unconscious??

nah I think he’s just hurt I’m p sure he really did get the guy

but still

that was... a big boom.... that’s not good

he’s just.... abandoning this kid on the rooftop??

but also he probably really does have to go if blood is coming out of his mouth

do heroes in this universe have secret identities?

I feel like yes but also no??

watch as this guy’s like “I don’t have a quirk either” and he’s just. like. an armstrong or something

that or he’s gonna crush this kid’s dreams and be like “no, it’s not possible” and I will be forced to ensure deku becomes the most successful hero ever out of Even More Pure Spite™ even if he idolizes the guy

oh yeah he’s gonna get his dreams crushed

IS ALL MIGHT GONNA VOUCH FOR HIM AND GET HIM AN OPPORTUNITY AT UA BC HE FEELS BAD FOR HIM

hmm this outro kinda slaps too

overall feelin good, like it so far, definitely think I won’t have trouble continuing watching at least for now

[elvendorkwanwan]

Hit Music 2005

No one expected Gorillaz to be so popular and people probably has forgotten Blur. Damon Albarn doesn’t seem to care though, he puts Blur aside and takes Jamie Hewlett to China for two whole weeks which he calls it “collecting folk songs”. They’ve been to Hunan, Guizhou, and Zhejiang. Not only did they travel Chinese attractions and taste all kinds of local cuisines in every streets and alleys, but they also promoted their new album while they were traveling. What a smart way to kill two birds with one stone.

Damon

Hit: Do you always wear a big sunglasses to look cool? Damon: Oh, no, it’s the light here, my eyes are sensitive to the light.(He said, taking off his glasses. Wow, what a typical handsome European, he has charming blue eyes.) Hit: What is your main purpose in coming to China? Damon: I was invited by a friend, but also was attracted by Chinese culture. I am interested in the culture and lifestyle of Chinese ethnic minorities, and their music in particular. We are so fascinated by it. On the other hand, we are promoting the new album Demon Days in here. In the past two weeks, we’ve been to Guiyang, Phoenix City, Changsha and Yiwu. But we are leaving today. Hit: That’s a shame, four more days and it’s the traditional Chinese autumn festival. You can have some delicious mooncakes on that day.(Damon seems to be interested in food.) Damon: Oh, yes. We have had some amazing food here. I found Chinese food really worthy of its reputation. I also bought a book of how to make dumplings. Hit: What’s the inspiration of making Gorillaz? Do you have any plans on touring? Damon: Each song is a story, and mostly happened on a dark night.It’s similar to the darkness that fell upon people after the 9 / 11 incident. For touring, as I have a very good impression of China, I will talk about it with my friends. We’re planning a world tour. I promise you, there will be a Chinese date. We’ll be back. (How’s the new video going? Damon: We are sampling in Africa right now, we have three videos done, now there’s one left. ) Hit: How did you and Jamie meet? Damon: We have many mutual friends, we’ve been knowing each others for 15 years.(Is it true that you guys live in the same building? Damon: Yeah, but that was a year ago, now we are living across the street.) Hit: What makes you want to form a HIP-HOP virtual band in the first place? Damon: Well, I still want to write pop music, but I don’t want to make ordinary music which is boring. And I’m interested in the idea of replacing actual people with cartoon characters. In fact, we can not be simply defined as hip hop band, because our music is very diverse, we got inspirations from everything. Gorillaz combines elements of Rock, reggae, hip-hop and lo-fi together. Hit: Would you like to talk about Oasis? They released a new album this year and it’s doing well. You guys were fighting a lot back in the old days. Damon: Well the battle between Blur and Oasis was some kinda promotion of the Britpop, isn’t it? As for our music, we better leave it to other people to judge. Hit: I also heard that you slammed the Live 8 concert, why is that? Damon: Because I think the concert lost its purpose. Assisting Africa is a formidable and complicated thing, and there are different ways to approach that. I think the reason to hold Live 8 concert is to help more people to understand Africa’s culture and its current situation. But live 8 failed to do that. For example, I used to think that I know about China, but it wasn’t until I actually came here and really got to know what people’s lives were like in here that I had a deeper feeling for China, a feeling that was different from the past. For the past two weeks, I’ve been fascinated by what’s going on here. I think Live 8 is a failure. It’s like if half the people in China were starving right now, and we organized a concert to help them, but not one Chinese was involved in the whole project, would you call that a success? Hit: Ok, let’s talk about something that’s less heavy. What other hobbies do you have besides music? Damon: Cooking, jogging, and playing with my baby daughter. I really like to cook, especially Chinese food. I had so many delicious food in China! I also bought a bunch of cooking books and I am going to try all of them when I get back. Hit: Can you make dumplings yet? Damon: We’ve got it covered. (Damon laughs, and I remind him that he needs more practice.) Oh, all I have to do is slice up the flour, chop up the vegetables and meat, then put in some mushrooms. And don’t forget about the chilli. (Damon windmills his hands while speaking, as if to prove that he can really cook. “Yeah, he loves chili, ” Jamie adds.) Hit: What’d you like to say to so many Chinese fans? Damon：谢谢(Thank you)！（He says these two words fluently in a strong British accent, somebody’s been practising obviously.）

Jamie

Hit: Can you introduce yourself first? Jamie: Introduce myself? (Jamie looks at me blankly. “Start from ‘I am —’ Ready, go!” Damon quips.) I’m Jamie (He thought for a while before blurting out. “I’m single. I’m looking for a girlfriend. ” — I made fun of him as Damon did.) I’m happy to be in China. I am the artist of the band, so I drew all of these arts. Hit: How did you come up with the idea of using cartoon characters as the band’s public image? Jamie: Because cartoon characters are so common, everyone has seen cartoons, and their characters can be more edgy. They can do a lot of things that actual people can’t in real life, they are the exaggeration of reality. And it’s easier to show artist’s intentions with cartoons. Hit: I noticed that in your paintings, characters’ eyes are specially designed. Why is that? Jamie: Well, because when you talk to someone, you look them in the eye, and through their eyes you can see what they’re thinking. Hit: Who is your favourite Gorillaz member? Jamie: I think it’s Murdoc, who’s formed the band and also is the heart of the band. Hit: When you were creating Gorillaz, did you ever think about making the band members’ appearances match the music? Jamie: Not Exactly. You know, the band members have their own personalities and backgrounds. So it’s more like… making cartoons. (Did you make their personalities more similar to the actual band members?) No, they are nothing like the people behind all this . Hit: Did anything hilarious happen during this trip? Jamie: We have a lot of funny stories, but it’s hard to explain. We spent most of the two weeks bouncing on the bus. Hit: What kind of person Damon is in your eyes? Jamie: He’s a lovely sunny boy.

Bonus

1. After Damon Albarn said his “thank you” to fans, I asked if he knew any other Chinese words, he immediately turned to Jamie, who was standing next to him, and asked, “How to say dumplings? ” And then he smiled and said, “饺子! ” which sounded way more precise than the “thank you”. 2. Damon talked a lot about the places he had visited, and he solemnly pointed to the green military rubber shoes on his feet, “Look! I bought them in PHOENIX CITY! ” Jamie, who was wearing the same shoes as Damon’s, also pointed to his feet and said, “Mine too! ” 3. Damon is apparently good at doodling, so he improvised on the magazine we brought with us… I just felt a little twitch at the corner of my mouth, I don’t know how to appreciate thta! Awkward!

for @damonalbarn​

​

[popculturebuffet]

Close Enough: So Long Boys And Clap Like This

ON this hour’s episodes: Josh decides to have a vasectomy after a pregnancy scare and soons end up dealing with second thoughts and bostonian robots while Alex regrets getting his after meeting what are maybe his children. Then Josh finally sells a game but it falls through and takes up extra jobs to avoid telling his family while Bridgette is forced to get a real job on her birthday and Alex enjoys inudstrial humis. Clap Like This under the cut. 

So Long Boys

Aka the greatest vacesctomy based comedy episode since Brooklyn Nine Nine’s “Choclate Milk”. If you don’t know the show or don’t remember that episode if you are a fellow 99er it’s the one where Jake thinks his superior officer and friend Terry getting a vasectomy means chopping his penis off. I mean it starts off just assuming he’s making a joke but it becomes blurry if he’s just making quips or genuinely thinks that’s how it works. It’s also easy to compare these two because they both, while vastly diffrent and great episodes in their own rights: have a simlilar beat to the plot: a character trying to get a vasectomy for responsible reasons but being unsure they don’t wnat more kids. It’s just Brooklyn Nine Nine is more also about Jake being hurt Terry dosen’t think of him as a friend, a position he reverses while Close Enough has indentured pop and lock teenagers, a dark ride dedicated to scaring people out of kids and bostionan robots that sound like JFK from Clone HIgh. How does any of this fit together, let’s take a look. 

So we open with Josh and Emily having a huge pregnancy scare, which was caused by the birthday sex from the pitch trailer aka Josh trying to pass it off as “we’re just doing our taxes sweetie!”. In other words the main bit I wanted to see transfered to the show proper. And while there’s a few joke this scene is mostly played for drama.. it’s not out of tone with the rest of the show. What really has made this show work for me is it combines regular show antics, but with the added maturity of having an older cast dealing with growing up. A bunch of 30 somethings to start instead of a bunch of 20 somethings so instead of dealing with stuff like video game competitionts, guys nights, and dating woes, it’s more dealing with juggling family and friends, having a job you hate and trying to ballance your career with your passion.  And here is no diffrent: Josh and Emily HAVE no money, live in a cramped apartment with their best friends and a newly divorced couple which as we’ve seen isn’t always easy, and work jobs htey utterly hate and would have to double down on, snuffing out their real dreams, in order to support this kid. Josh outright says he’ll get a second job and give up his video game development which wihle it’d probably be miserable for him would be a sad neciscity. I myself do this blog on the side while trying desperatley to get an actual paying job, it sucks and their situation is compounded by having a kid on top of it who needs their support and attention. It’s stressful enough without adding a second child. Thankfully it’s a false alarm.  However Josh, in a show of responsibility decided to do something about it and get a vasectomy. Still being josh though, his getting one also involves a massive and hilarious vasectomy party, where a bunch of people we never met, and alex and bridgette obviously play party games involving pinning sisssors on testies and theires even a breakdancing sperm. Emily and Pearle’s reactions are gold to this: Emily, before the opening, tells Josh he’s not allowed to plan parties anymore, understandable while Pearle genuinely didn’t belivie they were dumb enough to have a vasectomy party and gives out an understandable “Damn you white people” when she’s proven wrong. Alex also gets set up for his subplot in the episode mentioning he got his a year ago, which given his and Bridgette’s relationship was probably falling apart around then was a good call. I do however like this: Something big happend and Josh is taking responsibility for it, while still being josh about it, but it shows how unlike a lot of idiot heroes in adult cartoons,he’s still a genuinely nice guy who tries to do what’s right, and has more than one brain cell. he has two thank you. So Alex drives josh to get a vasectomy, while Randy presumibly watches Candace as we only see her at the start (Peale was watching her during hte party to help keep her in the dark for now) and finish of the episode. Meanwhile Emily, Bridgette and Pearle have a small B plot having brunch mamosas and boxing up candace’s baby stuff. We also find out for 100% sure our heroines nationatlities: Bridgette is japanese while Emily is Mexican. Mostly because Bridgette always saw Emily with a bigger family and only half for racist reasons that get her handcuffed to a pipe by a drunken Pearle. This show really needs more of Pearle asa every time she shows up she’s a fucking delight and if the show hopefully returns for season 2 I could easily see her getting more screentime. Emily ends up in tears and realizing she may want more kids, which is.. resonable. Their only 32. While it’s resonable to want or have any amount of kids, except like 20 like that one tlc show... I never watched it but when the only two things you hear about a show you don’t watch is the weird, archacic dating setup they have that feels like it produces a good marriage as much as Charlie Sheen did, and that the mother won’t stop having kids despite it nearly killing her  multiple times and having you know 20, you kinda don’t want to watch it.  Anyway it’s resonable to want a family of any size you want, Emily realises she’s not sure she wants to stop at 1 just yet.  Meanwhile in the A-Plot Josh has come to the same conclusion after finding out that not only is this version of a vasectomy he’s getting permentant, mostly due to ball scorching done by robots, but after a hilarious but deeplly insulting carnival ride in the clinic that’s supposed to Scare josh out of having kids and features two teenagers fighting and pop and locking, a goblin and a wall just saying why why why why, impilng kids ruin your sleep, your romantic lives and are terrible. Josh however understandably takes offense to this, and seeing a brother and sister.. only make him not want to deprive candace of possibly having a sister oneday. Again while he and Emily are in no way in position for a second kid now.. they have time and Josh could easily sell a game at some point: he almost does in the next episode. ONe of Emily and Bridgette’s songs could go viral. Or Josh could end up finding a much better day job or Emily could get a promtion at hers. While not wanting to have a second child while they can’t support one is the right move, Josh realizes not wanting ot have one at all, at least in their spectfic case, was an overreaction to a scary situation.  Josh decides to think more, despite the doctor offring up some pubic scaping for extra, and he and Alex end up finding the Teens from the ride.. who are in fact real kids who look an AWFUL lot and act an awfl lot like alex and are basically indentured to the doctor,who treats them like crap and has them undder contract to pop and lock for him and look at his new pubic hair designs (”Those nights are the hardest”). Josh decides not to go through with it but the bostioan robots who do the procedure refuse to let that happen and leave Josh, Alex and the Twins on the run, while Alex himself reconsiders parenthood as he’s now proud of what he thinks are his kids. As the four are cornered it turns out the doctor is also a prisoner.. but an unsympathetic one since he can A) go home and B) is willingly collaberating with obnoxious robots to do a dangerous verison of a serious procedure to save his own ass and is karmically atomized. When Alex brings up his thinking the kids are his, they sadly explain he isn’t: Their dad’s a republican senator (Tot hteir shame the girl, who I almost forgot to mention is voiced by the wonder Kate MIccui, in her second role in a JG Quintel show. HOpefully if there’s a season 2 or the show stars having arcs they can find a full role for her on the show. ) and Alex finds his sperm he donated ended up in a dumpster.. but is determined to protect the kids anyway. Thankfully our heroes are able to escape with Emily, who sneaks ina fter the robots locked down the faicility’s help, with Josh bummed because he was proud for being responsible as the two discuss still wanting to have kids, with Emily pointing out .. this is STILL responsible. Not going through with something you have doubts about and having an honest talk with your partner is the responsbe thing> The five of them escape, and while Alex knows he’s not the teens father, offers to be there for them if they ever need it.  Wrapping things up at a skating rink, The Ramierz’ skate and Josh and Emily plan to do their taxes again later, though likely with a rubber this time, and Alex got his vasectomy reverse and is really weird about it to Bridgette’s annoyance. Also 20,000 years into the future subhuman cavemen versions of hismelf are the dominatne lifeform Neat. Overall this ep was really good, having great character stuff for Josh Emily and Alex, while still having some good bits for the rest of the main cast minus randy who I feel the show honestly forgets exists half the time, with drunk Pearle being a delight. But it’s the emotional core for both sides: Josh and Emily hastily deciding to not have more kids before wondering if they want to keep the option open while Alex realisses he might want to be a dad himself and his bond with waht he thinks are his kids and protectivness of them is really sweet. It’s also not lacking in great jokes; The entire rollercoaster of “DON’T HAVE KIDS” is just black comedy gold from start to finsih including the green goblin for some reaosn, the boston robots and vasectomy doctor are great vilians and overall the episode is just really good and really mature for an episode that also makes plenty of testicle scaping jokes. You can do both. 

Clap Like This

And continuing the trend from the last few episodes, we have the weaker one (though Golden Gamer was still pretty damn good), second this time around, though like Golden Gamer it’s still decent.  The plot is a bit simplier and starts with Josh FINALLY selling a game to two idiot tech billionares, Clap LIke This, a game about clapping along that actually seems really damn fun and I wish were real like Ladder World.  While Emily enjoys being able to spend money and her husband finally living his dream or so she thinks, Bridgette, who we find out has been on an allowance from her parents, is cut off on her birthday and has to get a job at a forever 23, one of the few times this show has used an offbrand and not nearlya s awesome a name as “Plugger Inners” it feels lazier if only because again, Plugger Inners exists. But as was revealed earlier, the two guys who bought it went broke and the deal feell through but josh, feeling terrrible about them not being able to afford the finer things anymore, hides it from his family and takes as many shifts as possible at plugger inners. He also runs into David Hasslehoff doing his best mitch von malibu as he just.. throws more money at josh to do what his son asks. Or nephew or whatever. I went back and redited this after finding out that really was him and supposed to be him. I’m also calling his annoying son Hobie for reasons that will be come clear if you’ve ever watched allison pregler’s baywatching series but it’s always fun to see the hoff in something. Especailly the time he made this really embarassing music video. 

But alass the 200 dollars Hoff made off “jump in my car”  that he gave josh isn’t enough and with him having taken all the insltation jobs josh is forced to turn to black market insltations including one where he installs a tv while jaws eats a guy.. I genuinely wish they’d used this song.

[jowritesthingss]

A (Demi)Boy and His Demon: Prologue

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Pairing(s): LoSleep (Logic | Logan + Sleep | Remy)

Rating: Teen

Content Warning(s): lots of swearing, religion mention, demons mention, injury/blood (Remy gets a papercut)

Length: 1,418 words

Brief Summary: Sleep-deprived writer Remy accidentally summons a serious-and-seriously-fed-up demon named Logan. Prologue. In Which Remy Inadvertently Summons a Demon

Fic Masterlist!

*

In Remy’s defense, he hadn’t exactly meant to summon a demon in the middle of a coffee shop on just another typical Tuesday.

And they most certainly hadn’t meant to bind the poor sap to them for the rest of their (presumably now-shortened and miserable) life.

But there he was.

And that was exactly what he had done.

But—erm, well. We’ll get there.

-

“Remy!” a familiar voice chirped as said enby pushed the door open to his favorite haunt. “Do you how do?”

“Ugh. Like, horrible.” The answer was instinctual at this point. Usually it was just sarcastic, but on a deadline like this? Satan had nothing on the wrath of an editor.

The echo of the bell ringing bright through his ears, Remy walked over to the front counter, where his good friend and caffeine addiction enabler stood. They tried in vain to pretend that they were swaggering and not at all staggering from sleep deprivation and lack of caffeine.

“So it’ll be the usual for you, then, yeah?” Emile smiled, and god, for all the years they’ve spent working as a barista themselves, Remy would never understand how Emile could stay so upbeat while on-shift.

“You know it, gurl,” Remy answered, fishing out his wallet. “Although gimme the largest size this time, hun’.”

Emile clucked sympathetically, already turning and getting started on Remy’s iced coffee. “Deadline coming up?”

“Uh-huh. Tonight.” Remy sighed, slapping a ten dollar bill onto the counter. “I’m due to get the script for chapter sixty-nine to Remus, but like, he’s been too busy giggling over the number of the upcoming chapter to finish the one we’re supposed to publish tomorrow. Virgil’s on the warpath, and I’ve been roped into designing shit to make up for Remus falling behind.” He rolled his eyes.

“Golly, that sure sounds rough.” Emile slid some ice into Remy’s coffee before popping a lid on it, swirling it a couple times, and sliding it across the counter with some verbal sound effects to accompany it. He picked up the tenner and began to punch things into the cash register, counting out change for Remy. “But I believe in you!”

“Gurl, you shouldn’t. I don’t,” Remy snickered. They reached back into their bag, groping around for their reusable straw. Pulling it out, he popped it into his cup. “There’s a reason I’m the brains behind the writing of this operation, not the art. You think I’d be working with those idiots if I had a choice?”

“Yes, I do,” Emile said mildly. He handed over Remy’s change.

“Yeah, yeah. That’s fair.” Shoving his change into the tips jar, Remy rolled his eyes. Again. They did that a lot. Which, how could he not, when he was surrounded by so many dorks?

“Anyways, I’ll be in my usual corner, I guess.” Remy jerked their head towards their usual corner table. “Lemme know if you need any help back there, babe. Or if any tea needs spilling.” They winked at Emile from behind their sunglasses before turning and heading to sit down.

Once seated, Remy pulled out his laptop and the battered spiral notebook that he kept most of his ideas for their comic in. Exchanging their sunglasses somewhat reluctantly for a pair of blue light glasses, he booted up his computer. Then, after setting everything up in its typical position and connecting to the wifi in the coffee shop, Remy allowed themself a moment to sit back and sip at their iced coffee.

The contrasting tastes of sweet white mocha and bitter coffee filled his mouth, and Remy felt his shoulders relax for what had to be the first time in twelve to twenty-four hours.

Classes earlier in the day had been an absolute nightmare of scribbling in margins and surreptitiously typing the script up on his phone when professors weren’t looking. Then the night before had been a horror-filled dream sequence of exhaustion and trying to write actual content down without falling asleep on the keyboard and waking up with the L key imprinted on their nose and sixteen pages of keysmashes.

So suffice to say, Remy was not having a good time. But the iced coffee? It warmed their gay little heart. It made things just a bit more bearable on days like this.

All too soon the buzzing of his phone reminded Remy of their subsequent impending deadline and doom, and he came crashing back down to earth.

Sipping once more at their iced coffee, Remy set it off to the side, slipping in his earbuds and focusing in on the Word document in front of him. They began to type.

-

Three hours and two refills later, Remy had finished chapter sixty-nine, had sent it to Virgil to look over, and had even started on chapter seventy for a good measure.

Until Virgil sent back his edits, Remy’s focus of the moment had shifted to designs for chapter sixty-six, which Remus should’ve started drawing a few days ago, but nooo, the asshat wasn’t even done shading sixty-five, which was supposed to be posted in...Remy consulted their phone...in roughly six hours now. Fuck.

Remy couldn’t draw for shit, but they could research like nobody’s business, and designing and sketching was simple enough, so he wasn’t entirely unused to getting dragged into stuff like physical character designs and the creation of symbols and outfits (Remus was far too oafish and uncoordinated when it came to fashion, anyway).

Shaky as Remy’s art was, Remus certainly knew how to pick out what he liked from Remy’s miserable excuses for sketches, at least, so their partnership worked well enough...even if Remy privately thought his similarly-named partner acted like a dolt and smelled like minute ramen (and not even the good kind! more like the shrimp kind, and what the fuck kind of imbecile eats shrimp-flavored microwave ramen).

Finally satisfied with the roughly-sketched summoning circle that they had copied from the web, Remy exited out of Google Images.

Summoning circles, Remy had to admit, were a new topic of research for him. Their story—a Good Omens-type comic centering around an angel and a demon trapped in the human world—had required plenty of research into religion and religious imagery, of which they had not been a fan, but for some reason summoning circles had never really cropped up on their radar.

Remy may not have been a fan of the concept of angels, but he certainly wasn’t a fan of the concept of demons and the occult, either, so digging through the ominously dark websites had been...interesting. Eventually they had just given up and straight-up copied a summoning circle at random. They could take that and go from there, adding their own flair to it.

Remy looked down at the shaky summoning circle he had sketched out before him. It was kinda lopsided, but it was whatever. It was also much too boring, if you asked him. When they sent Remus their final reference, they’d put a note in the margins telling him to add some of that weird gory imagery stuff he was obsessed with. “Creep would really like that, huh,” Remy muttered aloud to himself.

Scrutinizing the copied circle for a few more moments, Remy mentally listed out some of the changes they wanted to make—an extra line here, a circle there, take out that square—and they reached into their backpack for one of the random looseleaf sheets of paper he always had floating around in there. Only, they grabbed at the wrong corner of the paper.

Feeling the sheet of paper slice into their pointer finger, Remy quietly hissed out a breath. “Fuck.” He drew his finger out of the bag, pulling it up to his face to get a good look at the injury, and shit, the papercut was bad enough that it was actually bleeding.

“Goddammit,” Remy cursed as a few drops of crimson splattered onto the paper in front of them, blurring over the details of the summoning circle he had drawn.

Remy popped his finger into his mouth and sucked at the smidgen of blood leaking out. Deciding to actually look at what they were sticking their hand into this time, they turned to the left, fully intending to practically stick his head into his bag to find a napkin and that pesky sheet of paper both.

This was how they came to be aware of the person who appeared, seemingly out of nowhere, to stand to the side of their table.

.

.

.

Prologue || One || Two || Three || Four || Five || Six

*

This was supposed to be a one-shot, but Remy told Logan to hold their coffee and then bullied me into making it a prologue and six chapters’ worth of useless gays. I accept my defeat with dignity and insist that it was, in fact, actually my decision in order to get used to writing multi-chap things again before I tackle my Big Bad AUs.

Want to be added onto any of my taglists? Shoot me an ask or a message here or via my other social media!

[demi-drawing]

in case you don’t live forever - ni no kuni

word count - 4846

tumblr sucks and won’t let me put a link so if you want to read this fic on ao3 my ni no kuni ao3 acc is @sweetpeasprite!!! it’s on there

so remember that older oliver design i made? haha yeah! so anyways what if that didn’t happen

DEATH WARNING there’s death in this fic. major characters die. it’s nothing gory and they all live long happy lives and die of old age but they still die so Be Warned

Oliver is thirteen.

When he arrives back in Motorville, the first thing he does is take a shower, and then he goes down to Miss Leila’s shop and talks to Myrtle about nothing in particular, until Miss Leila shoos him out not unkindly for “distracting her best employee”. On the way out, she says something odd.

“You seem different to usual, Oliver, dear.”

Oliver blinks. “Different how, Miss Leila?”

She stands in the doorway of the milk bar and shakes her head fondly. “I didn’t mean it in a bad way. More mature, I suppose.”

He laughs it off with a smile and a wave as he goes to see how much progress Phil has made on his car since he last saw him (was it when the Clarion was made? It feels like months ago), but it sticks in his head for the rest of the day.

---

Oliver is fifteen.

He hasn’t grown any taller. Phil and Myrtle were already taller than him to begin with, but now they tower over him; he supposes he must have a growth spurt someday soon. In the back of his mind, he worries over it, mind wandering along to the other world and its magic, but there’s no time for that when Denny’s made it into the track team, and Phil’s made a new car, and Myrtle’s taken up playing the flute (by Oliver’s recommendation).

He doesn’t think about it for a few months until all four of them are over at Phil’s garage, watching him work and chattering amongst themselves, occasionally handing him a tool when he asks for it. Somehow, the conversation takes a turn to two years ago.

“Man, do you remember when I hurt my ankle and just completely stopped running for a while?” Denny asks, leaning against a pile of old tires. Oliver looks up at him, then turns his gaze to the floor to avoid eye contact. Thankfully, he doesn't seem to notice. “That was weird. Honestly, I barely remember what even happened during that.”

“That was a few months before I got weird too, huh?” Phil says, his voice echoing from under the car. “Like, when I stopped working on any of my cars or… anything, really."

Myrtle frowns slightly. “Now that I think about it, Denny’s injury was only a few months after my sickness.” She leans back in the old garden chair Oliver had found buried under a tarp. “It is odd all of that happened in the same year.”

Oliver stays quiet, sitting cross-legged on the floor next to where Phil is halfway under his car, hoping to stay non-suspicious. Unfortunately, that doesn’t happen, as Phil rolls out from the motor and raises an eyebrow at him, streaks of motor oil on his cheeks. “Wasn’t that the year you disappeared for months at a time, Ollie?”

When Oliver doesn’t reply, only glancing away which in retrospect he thinks only makes him look suspicious, Denny hums in thought. “He came back to fix my ankle. And… whatever was stopping me from running, I guess.”

“Same with me,” Phil says, still staring at him, “but with my motivation, or whatever.”

“He cured my illness.” Myrtle pauses, scrunching her eyebrows together. “...And I think my parents’ marriage somehow?”

All three of them stop, glance at each other, and then stare at Oliver. He ducks his head and does a half-hearted shrug. Phil snorts.

“Take it from the guy who’s known him his whole life,” he says, ducking back under his car and making his voice start echoing again. “That’s just how Ollie is. He’s just such a nice person everyone naturally follows in his wake of good-hearted destruction.”

Denny laughs. “I can’t deny that. I swear I’ve seen flowers actually bloom in his presence. He’s, like, magic or something.”

“There’s also the fact he still looks eleven,” Myrtle says. “All us three are teens and Oliver’s still the age I met him.”

“I was thirteen when I met you!” Oliver says indignantly, speaking up for the first time since the conversation began.

“You looked eleven then, and you look eleven now,” Denny teases lightly. “But seriously, are you gonna get any taller or are you gonna be four foot something forever?”

Oliver splutters in offense as the rest of his so-called friends laugh.

---

Oliver is eighteen.

...He thinks. He still looks thirteen. Maybe he’s not been counting right.

Denny has left Motorville to try out for the state championships, and Phil’s now employed at Rusty’s garage; Oliver is proud of both of them. Though, with Myrtle still working for Miss Leila (she's getting paid for it now), Oliver’s the only one without a job. It’s kinda difficult to get one when you look thirteen. And he definitely only looks thirteen - he’s not actually still thirteen. That would be ridiculous, and impossible, and… magical, which is entirely possible. He steers his mind away from the topic whenever it happens to pop up.

With all the time he has now, what with everyone at their jobs, he visits the other world a lot more. Swaine’s co-running Hamelin with Marcassin, and Esther’s continuing to care for familiars. Swaine doesn’t look much different - other than occasionally he shaves now, which is a big shock - but Esther’s growing up at the same pace as Myrtle, which he supposes shouldn’t come as a surprise.

He wakes in a dream one night, and finds his mom standing in a field of flowers for the first time in five years.

“Oliver, sweetie,” she murmurs, and if Oliver is seeing and hearing her right, she seems on the verge of tears. He blinks. That's not right. It's usually the other way around. “I’m so sorry.”

“What…?” he whispers, and for once she comes up to him to sweep him in a hug, kneeling down to match his (unfortunate) height.

“We didn’t know,” she says, and her hug is exactly like how he remembers it. He presses his lips together as she murmurs, “Honey, we didn’t know. We’re both so sorry," into his ear.

Oliver swallows and wraps his arms around her middle. The dream doesn’t end as he remembers the rest of them doing - instead of her drifting away, into white space, his mom simply holds on tight, and the ending is so abrupt he wakes up startled, tears in his eyes.

There was definitely one thing about this dream that was the same as the others.

Great Sages can be so cryptic.

---

Oliver might be nineteen.

That’s what the calendar says. But he gets confused looks from his childhood best friends, and mistaken for another kid by actual thirteen year olds, who give him odd looks when he tells them (and himself) that he's not. At this point, he thinks Myrtle is convinced he’s magical. Which, he doesn’t particularly blame her for - after all, it’s the truth.

He visits Teeheeti one day, on a hunt for a certain lantern-nosed fairy. Of course, he’s so easily recognisable now that when he walks into the Fairyground, all the fairies with nothing better to do start calling for the Lord High Lord of the Fairies.

“Ollie-boy!” Drippy shouts, almost from the other side of the town. Oliver smiles and waves at him, and he comes racing over, lantern jingling furiously. “Haven’t seen you ‘round here in a bit! What’s going on, mun?”

“Not much!” Oliver says, smiling. “Just wanted to visit you, I guess.”

“There’s a change. Haven’t seen you in months, mun!" Drippy rolls his eyes, and Oliver winces apologetically. "Been lonely, I have. There’s been a new restaurant opened up here and everything! Come on, I’ll show you the way.”

Drippy leads him through the town, past the Cat’s Cradle and the giant octopus building that Oliver never really got the chance to learn the name of. As it turns out, the new restaurant is right near the Cavity Club. The seats are, of course, far too tiny for Oliver to sit on, so he just sits on the grass instead. They order and begin to wait.

“So, Ollie-boy,” Drippy starts, sipping a glass of water. “Wanna tell youer old friend what’s really bothering you?”

Oliver starts. “Wh- Mr. Drippy, there’s nothing bothering me! I-”

“Save youer breath, you’re a terrible liar.” Oliver stops talking, taking a drink from his own water quietly. He glances at Drippy, only to jump when he realises he’s leaning into his personal space and squinting at him in an almost threatening manner, if only he wasn’t so small.

“Okay, so maybe there’s something bothering me,” he mutters into his fairy-sized glass, built for fairy-sized hands.

Drippy continues to stare at him for a few moments before he says, “Well? Spit it out, mun, I don’t have all day.”

Oliver takes a deep breath, and lets it out slowly. “Mr. Drippy, can people without soulmates age?” he says heavily, looking down at the water in his glass and swirling it around as he waits for a response.

They’re both silent for a moment. Drippy looks Oliver up and down, and Oliver glances up to find his expression somber. “...At this point, there’s not much hope, is there?” he says softly, as though what he just said didn’t break Oliver’s heart, in the non-magical way.

Oliver blinks back tears, swallowing hard. Drippy pats his arm lightly, and they sit in silence for a minute before their food arrives, and Drippy starts attempting small talk. Oliver does his best to respond, trying to smile, but the mood has been brought down.

Oliver thanks Drippy, though he’s not sure what for, and the fairy watches as he casts Gateway home. There, he lies on his bed and stares at the ceiling for a while. At some point, tears start to fall. At some point, he starts to sob.

Oliver is thirteen.

---

Oliver is thirteen.

He’s accepted it now. It hasn’t sunk in quite yet, but he’s at least accepted it. That doesn’t mean everything else stops growing. At some point, all his friends turn twenty-five. He’s too busy accepting he will genuinely be four foot something for the rest of his life, if his life ever ends, which it doesn’t seem to be doing any time soon.

Marcassin, now in his early thirties, mentions Cassiopeia during one of Oliver’s trips to Hamelin. She’s apparently doing very well - only blowing up a toaster a month. She had made a public apology, back when Oliver was thirteen and meant to be thirteen, and twelve years later, most have forgiven her. Of course, some haven’t, which is reasonable, considering everything she did. Oliver hasn't seen her since before his whole immortality revelation, too busy with, uh… his immortality revelation. Which seems strange, but he already gets enough pitying looks from his friends - he didn't want to get more.

So, he casts Travel in the direction of the Ivory Tower in search of a certain green-haired queen.

As it so happens, he lands right in the main flight bay of the castle, where he first flew Tengri in to fight the White Witch all those years ago. Cassiopeia clearly hadn't been lying when she said her first step would be flowers - there are flowerpots and planters and vases filled with them on every pedestal Oliver remembers being empty before, and all the deactivated robots have their nooks and crannies filled with pastel pink and blue petals. He brushes his hand along a few of the taller plants. They look incredibly healthy, considering how many there are - he wonders if Cassiopeia has enchanted them, or maybe has someone else take care of them. It's most likely the former - he's not sure having this many of them here would be worth it otherwise.

He wanders through the halls, no longer filled with wild beasts, until he hears a familiar tune hummed by a familiar voice. He makes a right and heads straight for it, trying to remember where the path he's walking leads but ultimately failing. As he gets closer to the voice, he recognises the melody. It’s the Clarion’s song, the one Esther played to clear the Miasma Marshes of the cursed fog. Oliver smiles nostalgically. He hasn’t heard it in twelve years, after all.

He manages to find a circular room with a beautiful segmented glass domed roof, letting him see the bright blue sky. The room seems to have either been built specifically to be a garden, or been entirely repurposed to be one. The floor is made of red brick, and there are flower beds blooming with so many plants they overhang heavily onto the small paths leading through the growth. Oliver can only name a few of these flowers - he can see roses, violets, and a few... carnations? - but he’s stunned by their beauty nonetheless.

In the middle of the garden, barely distinguishable through the flowers, stands Queen Cassiopeia, former Nazcaan royalty. Her white headpiece is barely visible over the giant sunflowers she appears to be watering, and she seems to be so caught up in it that she doesn't notice Oliver come in. He winds his way through the path until he's standing near her, coughs quietly, and her head snaps to attention. She stares at him for a few seconds before smiling.

"Oliver!" she exclaims, putting down her watering can. "You haven't visited in a while! Would you care for some tea? I know you prefer coffee, but I believe Marcassin took my coffeemaker away from me after… some incident or another, I'm sure."

Oliver smiles. "I would love some, Queen Cassiopeia."

She exits the garden, gesturing for him to follow. "How many times must I tell you, please just call me Cassiopeia. Or even Pea! It was my name at one point, you know."

Oliver giggles as he's led down marble hallways and past yet more flowers before they arrive in the kitchen. Cassiopeia immediately fills the kettle and puts it on the stove, while Oliver sits at the table in the middle of the room. She makes small talk as the kettle boils, asking Oliver about his day and whether anything interesting has happened recently, to which he answers to the best of his ability. The kettle whistles, and Cassiopeia pours water into two teacups and places teabags in both, setting one down in front of Oliver and sitting across from him with her own.

"Now, as much as I adore your visits," Cassiopeia says, which makes Oliver smile, "is there any reason you've come to me today? And with so little warning, as well."

Oliver swirls his tea around his cup. "Well, Queen Cassiopeia," he winces apologetically as she gives him a dry look when he says her title, "I haven't, uh… haven't been aging these past few years? And I, uh, thought you might… know something about that, in some way."

She stares at him, and he ducks his head to avoid her gaze. "You haven't been aging?" she says, tapping one of her fingers on the table. "How did that come about, I wonder? I, myself, am immortal only due to my use of the forbidden spell…" Her eyebrows scrunch together as she traces the wooden pattern in the table.

Oliver bites his lip, then hums in an attempt to break the quiet. "Has anyone ever told you my soulmate was Shadar?"

Cassiopeia chokes on air, glancing up with wide eyes. "Shadar? The Dark Djinn?"

"That's the one..." Oliver murmurs, looking away. It's not that he's… embarrassed his soulmate was Lucien, just… the reaction.

"But- you-" She struggles to get the words out, making Oliver wince. "You're… you! And Shadar was… so bitter. I don't remember much from my White Witch days, but he was such a big part, I don't know if I could forget…" Cassiopeia taste-tests her tea, wincing as she burns her tongue, before her eyes go wide as she seems to realise something. "Did you not defeat the Dark Djinn? Is he not… dead? I vaguely remember him dying…"

"He is!" Oliver says, quickly. "But he… severed the link between our souls. When he died, I mean. He turned out to be okay! He just, uh... wanted to protect the world. His… his actual name was Lucien." He taps his fingers on the table anxiously. "With the link gone, I haven't… aged at all."

"Wait… yes, you two being soulmates is coming back to me now." She leans back in her chair, putting one hand to her forehead and exhaling. "I apologise. My memories from my time as the White Witch are… faint." She huffs, shaking her head slightly. "So, you think because you don't have a soulmate to age alongside, you can't age at all?"

"That's… pretty much it, yeah." Oliver sighs, trying to take a sip from his teacup and wincing as he burns his tongue, trying to blow the steam out of his teacup.

They sit in an almost, but not quite, awkward silence for a few moments or so, carefully sipping at their drinks, trying not to burn themselves. "So… how old are you?" Cassiopeia pipes up, startling Oliver.

"Physically? Thirteen. But, if I were aging, I'd be… twenty-five or so now?"

She laughs to herself quietly. "I hardly know the difference between those numbers. In my many… many years sitting in this castle, I appear to have forgotten how humans age."

"Oh, well…" Oliver thinks to himself, trying to find a good comparison. "Have you seen Esther recently?"

Cassiopeia nods. "A year or so ago, I believe."

"I'd be the same age as her."

She blinks, shocked, as she presumably thinks back to her last encounter with Esther. “Wow. You really did stop aging." She smiles slightly, a quietly fond look in her eye. "You're awfully young to be immortal, you know."

He hides his nose in his cup. "Don't rub it in," he grumbles, more to himself than to Cassiopeia. She laughs, and he finds himself smiling along with her, until he's giggling into his cup.

Cassiopeia leans forward, resting her forearms on the table, as Oliver takes a sip from his tea to calm his laughter. "What are you going to do now?" she asks, and she seems genuinely curious.

Oliver blinks. "Hm?"

"Well, you just found out you're immortal - or, at least, can't age." She smiles at him, sitting back again. He doesn't tell her he didn't just figure it out, but then again, maybe twelve years isn't all that much to Cassiopeia, considering. "What are you going to do for the rest of your never-ending life?" she asks.

He thinks for a few moments. What is he going to do? He's literally going to be thirteen forever; there's not much he can do about that, and he's already bored of it after twelve years. He supposes he could go back to Motorville, but people are already suspicious there, and for good reason. No one stays the same age, after all - unless you're Oliver, that is. He did enough travelling for a lifetime when he went on his quest to defeat Shadar, and though he didn't know it for the bulk of the time, the White Witch as well.

He hums into his cup. "I don't really know," he admits, biting his lip as the sentence settles in his mind.

Cassiopeia looks uncharacteristically nervous as she stares down her teacup, before she quietly says, "You could… stay with me."

Oliver looks up, blinking a few times, staring at her as he processes her words. “Stay… here? At the Ivory Tower?”

She nods slowly, as though warming up to the idea. “It gets awfully lonely around here, you know. Though, perhaps I should think of a new name…" She stares to her left at nothing in particular, lips pursed in thought. ""Ivory Tower" sounds a bit sinister, don't you think?"

"I think it's fine," Oliver replies, staring down at his now almost empty cup. Ivory Tower sounds okay to him, but they're getting off track. "But, um, back to the, uh, "staying with you", thing…"

"Ah! Yes." Cassiopeia brings her attention back to Oliver, smiling. "Do you think it's a good idea? I have a spare room you could stay in. Many spare rooms, in fact. This palace is enormous."

"Trust me, I figured that out trying to find the throne room the first time," Oliver laughs into his cup, draining it of the last drops of tea. He sets it down with a small clink.

They sit in silence for a bit as Cassiopeia finishes her drink as well. Oliver traces the lines in the wooden table with his finger as he thinks over her proposition. The more he thinks about it, the more he warms up to the idea. After all, he has nowhere else to go. All his friends in Motorville have drifted apart from him; it's kind of hard to stay friends with a forever-thirteen year old when you're in your mid twenties, not to mention he hardly spends time there anymore. 

And all his friends here… and in Motorville, for that matter… he'll outlive all of them. He'll be thirteen when they're old and grey. When they're gone… where will he go, if he doesn't stay here? He'll be wandering alone forever. Like… Cassiopeia was, but less restricted by a kingdom. That… scares him a little. What would happen if he were to be alone? What would happen if he were alone as long as Cassiopeia was? Would he become something like the White Witch? Or maybe... Shadar? His mind whispers that Shadar was his soulmate, and Oliver frantically chases the thought away, refusing to think about it, in the same way he's been refusing to think about it for the past twelve years.

"Oliver?" Cassiopeia murmurs, and he looks up, startled. "Are you okay?"

He presses his lips together, electing to ignore the question in favour of answering hers. "I… guess I could stay here…" Oliver murmurs, and Cassiopeia visibly perks up. "Th- that is, if it's not too much trouble!" he adds on quickly, not particularly wanting to be a burden.

She blinks slowly. "Oliver, child," she starts, and Oliver wrinkles his nose, seeing as he's technically not a child, "I have been alone for so long, just having someone here who isn't that godforsaken Council is a blessing."

Oliver blinks, staring at her for a moment, before lighting up with a smile as he exclaims, "Thank you, Queen Cassiopeia!"

Cassiopeia sighs, though it's through a grin of her own. "What will it take for you to stop calling me that? Perhaps I shall start calling you Saviour Oliver."

"...Please don't."

"Very well, Saviour Oliver."

---

Swaine dies first.

It maybe shouldn't be a shock to Oliver, who's been living with Cassiopeia for the past fifty years and visiting his friends every week, watching their grey hairs slowly grow in as his stays the same red as always. But somehow, it is a shock, and it's another reminder of how he's still thirteen while his friends are literally dying around him. He attends the funerals: the public one and the private one. Both have a traditional Hamelin send off - that is, cremation. The actual body gets set on fire during the private ceremony.

In both ceremonies, Marcassin makes a speech. In both ceremonies, he cries. As does Esther, and Drippy. Oliver attends with Cassiopeia, and quietly sobs into a handkerchief adorned with Nazcaan symbols, as Cassiopeia lets him lean on her shoulder.

Marcassin is next. His son ascends the throne, thankfully much older than his father was when he did the same. He gets a similar set of ceremonies; being the emperor and all, though, they're bigger than Swaine's funerals were (Oliver's not sure Marcassin would have liked that), and the three kingdoms are swung into sadness for a week before things get back on track. Everything goes back to normal so quickly after even the emperor's death, Oliver thinks, watching the main street of Hamelin bustle from a palace balcony as he cries silent tears for his friend.

The next funeral is thankfully a good few years later - Esther's. Gogo dies with her, what with him being born out of Form Familiar. Her ceremony is much quieter, yet Al Mamoon keeps their heads bowed for her, the daughter of a Great Sage and one of the best familiar keepers around. Oliver realises Esther dying means Myrtle must be dead as well, and quietly mourns two friends instead of one. He swallows as he realises it also means his childhood friends from Motorville must either be already dead or close to it. During Esther's ceremony, Drippy clings to Oliver's shoulder as they both realise they're the only two of the original team left.

Drippy lives for much longer, thankfully - he looks the same as he did seventy years ago, bar maybe a few extra wrinkles surrounding his eyes. Oliver asks him about this, and at first he responds with offense, but then explains that fairies have a much longer lifespan than humans do. He lives for another fifty years before finally kicking the bucket. Oliver is the only human allowed at what would otherwise be a fairy-only ceremony. He watches Drippy's body vanish into a puff of golden magic, and tries not to burst out wailing, because he can hear Drippy calling him a Cry-Baby Bunting at even the first sign of tears. Only a few of the other fairies cry. Many of them who weren't alive a hundred and twenty years ago (has it really been that long? Oliver's heart squeezes as he realises it might have been) give Oliver almost offended looks during the ceremony, not knowing who he is, but the fairies that know him tell him to pay them no mind.

When he returns to the Ivory Tower after Drippy's funeral, he sits in the garden for a while, surrounded by plants and flowers, tugging on his black mourning cape (which Oliver wishes he didn't know was a thing) and gazing up at the steadily darkening sky through the glass. For some reason, it didn't hit him til now that everyone he once knew from when he was actually thirteen, on a dumb quest to save the world that really never should have worked but did, is gone. Everyone, from every town. Drippy was the last part of that time he had. The first tear falls, then the next, and he feels himself breaking down as he starts sobbing, sitting on the red brick below him and letting himself cry for a time that's long since passed. Somewhere between tears comes the realisation that he won't be able to see his mom in the afterlife, if there is one (and considering he's died before, he thinks there is) and he thought he was over her death, there are more recent deaths to be sad about, but all his grief hits him at once, and he wails and howls into his hands like the thirteen year old that he isn't.

Cassiopeia finds him curled up in a ball on the floor next to a bench, tear tracks still wet on his cheeks. The first thing she does is question why he's on the floor when there's a perfectly good bench right next to him, which makes him smile, even though it's fake. Then she scoops him up and carries him through to the living room, where he eventually falls asleep on her shoulder as she reads through a peace treaty from ten thousand years ago that she found in the back of the palace library and highlights the spelling mistakes.

The next day, Oliver returns to the garden and, following in Cassiopeia's footsteps, picks five flowers to fill with his memories. It doesn't mean he loses those memories himself, it just means if he ever forgets his adventures, he can always have a little reminder.

One is blue, like Drippy's fairy suit. One is pink, which was Esther's favourite colour. Another green, as Swaine's coat. The fourth purple, like Marcassin's cape. The last flower's petals are pure white, with a black center. Oliver stores in this flower his memories with his mother, and with Lucien, and how he saved Cassiopeia; it's the centrepiece of the bouquet. He keeps the five flowers in a vase in his room, enchanting them to never die.

---

Oliver is thirteen.

Sitting on a kitchen counter and watching-slash-guiding Cassiopeia on how to use an electric kettle (he's not entirely sure, himself - they've only been invented recently), he smiles.

"Why in the world are you smiling?" Cassiopeia says, trying to figure out where the on button is. "This damned machine still won't turn on!"

"I don't think there's any need to cuss out the kettle, Cassiopeia," Oliver says. "We have all the time in the world, after all." She glares at him, and he giggles.

"Read the instructions to me one more time, I think I got it."

It still hasn't quite sunk in that he'll be thirteen forever, but it will eventually.

He does have eternity, after all.

[get-rammed]

Beasttale

I'M TALKING ABOUT THE ORIGINAL BEASTTALE THAT I CREATED A FEW YEARS AGO, AND STOPPED DOING A YEAR AGO. This is aimed at the Beasttale tag, as I know a few have cropped up since I iced mine. So I don't want anyone to think I'm attacking them or the AU they like

A lot of my stuff has been removed from the Beasttale tag making it harder to find me and the things I made. It's annoying. Or been buried. So if this does go into the tag and anyone checking it out sees this, hi. I'm Ram and once upon a time I created a Beasttale and it used to terrorize the tag. It was the most popular version of Beasttale at the time and since has been laid to rest allowing different beasts to grow.

Anyone who grows curious about my AU. It isn't like the current popular one. Mine is unkind and violent. It has its soft moments with my boys. But for the most part it's not for the faint of heart. Don't go in looking for a gentle but scary Sans. You'll come out scarred 😂 Bomber was gentle at times, but he would 100% eat your guts.

I know the 4 of you left from my reign of terror are asking me, "Ram, why the f*ck are you doing this now??" Because I'm bored as f*ck and it's always bothered me that the story I wanted to tell, never came about.

So I'm going to basically explain what the story I had planned was. This will be confusing as I'm going to go over ideas I teased and or introduced, but either didn't explain well enough, or did nothing. Also some ideas I never talked about. I'll do some fun facts at the bottom about Boys that I designed, but never implemented, and some other odd ideas I had.

Tldr; Bomberboy (Sans), was an experiment of Gasters. He had a human soul shard (Perseverance) along with 4 other monsters in his soul and brain, which is why he's a mess. BB shoved Gaster into the CORE, which corrupted the dimension. It made everyone big and a little meaner. But not too far as at the time I was too scared to go too far on anyone but Sans and Alphys. After that it's just basic Undertale plot. I'd do it all differently now. Tone down the violence and edge a bit…but increase the beast design a bit. But not too much. I'll explain later. 

I’m just going to warn everyone now that is about as professional as literally anything else I have ever written. Sorry. It goes from explaining sh*t to like, almost storytelling and whoops. I'm not very good at this. Imagine a lot of hand motions as you read. This is years of story that I've been sitting on. Just. Work with me here. A lot of these ideas are very very old. The original name for Beasttale was Testtale. Name got changed because me and a friend couldn't stop laughing because testicle. We're adults I promise. 

This whole thing takes place over nine years in universe. So I condensed the sh*t out of my ideas and it's all very rushed and bad. Forgive me. This isn't supposed to be written like a story. It's supposed to be written like I'm explaining things at him point 😂

Alright, alright, alright. So to start off. After reading the entries you can find in the hidden lab, and the idea that Gaster wrote them, I came to the conclusion that he was a massive asshole. As you do. Which is why Bomber hates him, and why I personally made him a massive prick. I like the idea of Dadster, but like, I had edgy designs, I had to have a reason for them. I had to have a reason for the scars Bomber had.

After an unknown helicopter pilot crashed ((this character does not exist in the universe of Undertale. She was made for this AU)), and subsequently went into a cave for safety, only to fall into the Underground, she was killed by Asgore. She fought as hard as she could, but she could do nothing against the powerful monster. Her soul was safely harvested and stored.

Asgore made the lie about needing 7 souls, which Gaster said he would corroborate if he was allowed access to one of the souls as they had 6 at the time. ((Another perseverance SOUL bearer falls shortly after. Which is how there are 6 SOULs by the time Frisk rolls around)) Asgore had two choices. He could deny access, in which case, Gaster tells everyone that any boss monster could easily open the way. Or allow him access. Of course Gaster reminded him that if the soul goes missing, then Monsters are trapped longer, which is what Asgore wants. Soul goes “missing”, Asgore claims it’s due to a small leak in the container, Gaster gets his soul and his plan goes into action.

A lot of Monster children just wander freely around the Underground because it’s safe! Monsters wouldn’t hurt other Monsters. Right? Well. Gaster is his own kind of breed. He’s very jaded from the war. Mentally broken. Saw a lot of good Monsters slaughtered. Has no empathy left for anyone. He casually snatches two kids that wander too close to his lab. A little skeleton, Sans, and a small lizard with no arms, Alphys. Something of note. I liked the idea of Alphys being Monster Kids older sister. So she lacks arms for this first bit. This was literally never mentioned at any point and if I do DeltaBeast stuff, Alphys will lack arms. It was a mistake on my part to give them to her in the singular piece of art that exists at this time.

Alphys is locked away as Gaster focuses on the mouthy little skeleton. Experiments on the kid. See how much he can handle before he needs a break. Then push him further the next time. Gaster is trying to make a monster that can break the barrier, and destroy humans. Sans, or J-5, as he was called in those years trapped with gaster, was hopefully going to be that monster.

Basic details for this as the actual details of the experiments were never really thought out. But I guess they could include. Breaking his bones and seeing how long magic took to heal them. Forcing him to fight rabid animals and see what he would do (mind you Sans would have been 10 when Gaster traps him). He fights them to protect himself. Physical attacks hurt. He's got a lot of tiny scars from them. Force him to fight for his life against half melted monsters. These he doesn't fight. Mentally and physically beat it into the kid that he fights or Gaster will hurt Alphys ((Which during this time she was just subject to SOUL testing as Sans always offered himself for the harder stuff)). All to get him to a fallen state so he can alter his SOUL. Things get worse later.

Sans isn't considered a boss monster here, and Gaster knows this. Giving Sans a full human soul would just kill him. Can't have that. Gaster has put too much time and effort into this experiment at this point. It's been a good three year of nonstop tests and beatdowns for Sans. He's ready. Gaster pulls out Sans soul and tears part of it away, slowly, carefully. Then wedges the human soul in its place. The piece doesn't fit right, but Sans also isn't dead yet. But blah blah blah, he's not strong enough to hold it and he starts melting down. Perfect. Time for phase 2.

Experiments J-1-4 were all failures. Note. It varies on AU on how many extra monsters were added to the boys. The monsters inside is what defines their heat form. Anyone remember that post with their forms that had some floating heads around them? Yeah. Extra note. The four monsters in Sans do not have names. They have designs, but any personality or names do not exist. Nor will ever exist. None could hold a shard of the human soul. But. Five monsters together trying to hold a soul? It might just work. Which it does obviously. He's kept all the failures in a state of falling down but not dead. Similar to the abominations in the lab currently. Alphys followed Gaster on accident. Just in a nicer way.

Sans is unconscious the whole time and remains as such for a few days. Gaster now waits as the tiny skeleton is reformed. It's boring. He's going to start up experiments on him when Alphys basically tells him to f*ck off and leave Sans alone. Which is when he turns his attention to her. 

Now he wants a fair fight for Sans when's out and about. Sans needs a watcher or guardian ot some form to regulate his ideas. So now it's Alphys' turn for the f*ckery. Beat the snot out of her. Pitch her against other monsters. See how well she fights. Similar to Sans, she refuses to fight. When she can't take anymore Gaster stops the fight. Casually pops her soul out and just as casually slices it up and wedges the little piece of Sans in. Forcibly bonding the two in a way no one else understands. It's not like a mated bond kinda thing. It's a connection akin to siblings on the same wavelength.

This finally wakes Sans up. The whole time he was stuck in a dream with the new voices in his head. They're all super unhappy and they all want to use Sans to get back at Gaster. The sudden added weight of Alphys' fear and anxiety gets him on his feet. Alphys can feel the terror and confusion from Sans. She can't feel the others, just him. Gaster f*cks about with her soul and essentially her DNA. She's got arms now. They're painful and new. She hates them. Gaster did what he set out to do that day and tosses Alphys back in with Sans. Mostly to see what happens.

Sans is on his feet, but he's lost and with so many trying to fight for control right now, he's basically stuck where he stands. He wants to move to comfort Alphys, his friend is crying and needs comfort. The way she comforted him every day. Every voice in his head is screaming to attack. But he doesn't. He's stronger than them. It's his body dang it. Comfort that crying lizard. It's like a mutual thing. She feels better, so now he does. Gasters happy. Alphys can still be used as a safety shield then. He lets them rest. The coming years have a lot in store.

Honestly he lets them rest for a few days. But when he thinks they've had enough, barges in. At this point Sans is halfway to his Meltdown form. A form that has never been posted or ever mentioned. So don't go looking. I might post art of old concepts if enough people are curious. Teeth growing out of his head, fur and slime showing up all over his body. He's beautiful to Gaster. It worked perfectly. Keep in mind a lot of ideas for SOULs I made on my own. SOULs would kind of be like their whole genetic code, but you can easily alter it if you know how. Which is what he was testing on Alphys for. 

Alphys sprouted feathers where her spikes used to be down the back of her head. Sans is now considered a Boss monster and Alphys a significantly stronger monster.

Sans has the strength to pull out of Gasters grip. Which gets him chained up. Which is how he got the scars on his wrists and ankles. Sans can't really do much besides pull away or mutter. Too much noise in his head. He can barely walk and is basically dragged. Alphys is trying her best to break out of Gasters grip because she has no idea what the plan is. But she knows it's not going to be good. Both her and Sans are different now. She's terrified. Sans just kinda stops and this causes Gaster to basically trip and nearly fall. Loses his grip for less than a second and Alphys tries to take off. Gets her new much longer tall grabbed. Scars from that.

Yay finally testing room. Seat them both in separate halves of the room. They can see one another, but can't hear the other or get to them. Answer some basic questions. How are you feeling and sh*t like that. Alphys is currently mortified and can't speak. Sans just can't speak. He can't even focus on anything. The person asking the questions is told to be ruder, ask more invasive questions. Things to rile up either of them. Nothing. "What would your parents think of you now?" Alphys starts crying. Gaster is testing for something specific right now. 

"Do you think they would recognize you?" Crying harder. "What do you think your little brother would say?" Now she's mad. Looks through the mirrored glass and tells Gaster to leave him out of this. Ranting. Years of pent up anger and frustration. Guards are coming in as she threatens the scientists and guards with her chair. Sans starts purring and chattering on his side. The panic is evident on what remains of his face. Alphys calms down out of her rant as Sans continues to calm himself. Gaster is mentally fist bumping himself. Perfect SOUL bond.

"They're both calm. Go back in and do what you have to, to get number five to break containment." Guards go back in and well. Sorry Alphys. Few more scars and another beat down. 

Sans is pretty quick to get up. Easily nudging his scientist down out of his way. He realizes he can't break the glass or break the wall with physical attacks. But magic. He got that good burn in his gut and zoop. He's got the ability to teleport now. Not what he was aiming for but it works. Gaster is so excited he might just do a little dance.

Easily knock the guards out of the way and hiss at them. Then comfort friend. Gather her into his arms and scooch into a corner where no one can touch her. Gaster is pleased with the results found, but he wants to do some physical testing with J-5. Instead of like, asking him to come along, Gaster goes the harder route. Uses a hook he's used before to move experiments. Hook it on their mouth and  pull them along. Well. J-5 is a little...soft inside right now. The hook slides through the roof of his mouth and just knocks right through his right lateral incisor. Which is how Bomber lost that tooth :) also why he's not keen on it being touched. It still hurts him a lot.

To the absolute horror of everyone in the room, including Gaster. J-5 starts bleeding. Blood just pouring from his mouth. Everyone is a gangster until a magic monster starts bleeding red blood. No one wants to touch him or the blood. Gaster basically grabs the broken tooth and acts like he didn't just internally scream. "Recontain them. Quarantine J-five. Decontaminate J-six and quarantine it as well."

Gaster does some testing and yeah, the blood is human and Sans' bone is partially human. So now he can survive at least some physical attacks from a human. Which funny enough. One just fell the other day. ((This Human has no name, and isn't important outside of the thing coming up))  The Guards are having issues locating the Human as they seemingly "vanished". Gaster literally just stood outside of Toriel's door and waited till it closed to grab them before the guards got there.

Sans is just tied to a bed. Chilling. Left alone with the new guys in his head. They want to dust everyone. They just keep chanting at him to kill. Kid is thirteen. He doesn't know what to do here. Maybe he should do as they're saying. Human in his head is like "dude. f*ck those guys. If you wanted to kill everyone you'd have done it. Just hang tight. We're all in this together now whether we wanted to be or not. We'll get out of this." Thanks dead human lady :D

Others don't listen. They're J-1,2,3,4. They've all lost it. They over power Sans internally and now he enters Meltdown mode. Full Meltdown. So he's an abomination of parts and teeth. He's f*cking strong. I mean, come on. Scientists had him held down with some cheap rope. Should be happy it held him down as long as it did.

Meltdown can't walk to save their lives. So they crawl. Large sticky arms that drag the dead weight of the legs and tail. Someone is trying to figure out how to leg while everyone else focuses on crawling to the door. Legs are moving. They use the door as leverage to help them up to their feet. Wobbly but they can move and attack efficiently.

First scientist spotted is blindsided. Meltdown crashes through them and immediately dusts them upon contact. Some others see this and the laboratory enters shut down. Gaster is alerted. Meltdown has killed a few more and is shambling around trying to find more to kill. There are thick plates going up their back. The ones near the tail are glowing purple. It's slowly traveling up their back through the spikes. I'm sorry but the effect looked really good in the most recent Godzilla movie.

Gaster finds and corners them when the glow is at the base of their neck. He immediately recognizes this is going to be bad and ducks out of the hall. Glow is all the way up and a purple laser beam shoots down the hall where Gaster had been standing. It hits a few people further down the hall and kills them. Melts through the metal at the end of the hall. This attack tires Meltdown out and brings Sans back to pilot his own body.

After that incident Sans is muzzled, chained, and monitored at all times. He's kept sedated until Gaster needs him. Like literally the day after the incident he throws Sans into a cage with the Human they had nabbed. Gaster tells the Human if they want to live, they have to fight the abomination in front of them. Sans tries to convey that he doesn't want to fight, but you know how people can be. Hits Sans pretty good in the head with a metal bar. The attack incites Meltdown. Which leads to a big laser beam, a very dead Human, and very shattered SOUL. 

Three years later, Sans is 16, and is basically stuck in the back seat of his own body. The other four have had the controls basically since the Human test subject. Gaster just wakes Meltdown up to test the laser, and take some notes. Then knocks them out again. Notes have been used to make the Gaster Blasters. They're not ready to be used. Get to that in a minute.

While Meltdown is unconscious, Gaster has been teaching Alphys her duties. She's basically there to make sure Meltdown doesn't have another, well, meltdown. There to offer energy and help if needed. There to keep the beast under control. She can be replaced is what he always told her. Reality is, she couldn't have been, because any more chunks of SOUL taken from Sans would have killed him. 

With Alphys finally brainwashed, she had no moral support the last three years, he moves onto Meltdown. Alphys is the only person Meltdown will listen to and the only one they will not attack on site. She can easily get them in and out of testing chambers. Get them to cooperate and not hurt anyone. To Gaster they're almost ready. He just needs to finish up his weapons. 

Next three years, both are 19, and are a lot calmer. With the both of them listening and cooperating at all times, Gaster is able to focus on his Gaster Blasters. He's got an ego. It took the past three years to build the shells and make sure the laser function worked. Once he was ready he did a test. Added what remained of J-2's SOUL to the machine. It worked, J-2 was within the Balster, and was awaiting commands. Perfect. But they didn't listen to Gaster. Instead stared at him until he gave up. Muzzled the massive skull and went to find Alphys.

The skull acknowledged her, but wouldn't respond to her commands. J-2 doesn't acknowledge or respond to Meltdown. It's highly annoying to Gaster as part of who is controlling Meltdown is literally in the Blaster. J-2 won't acknowledge anyone in the laboratory. Even tried a few civilians under the guise of it being to open the barrier. Nothing. King? Nope. His guards? Nada.  Gives up for now. He has to do something else. These Blasters were supposed to be his weapons of mass destruction, but they listen to no one. 

Except for when one little badger skeleton walks in. He heard about the big skull and he wanted to see what the fuss was about. Says his name is Papyrus, who is 17. J-2 responds to the name and acknowledges Papyrus. Doesn't listen to him, but it's something.

Gaster is very friendly with Papyrus. Trying a different tactic. J-2 follows Papyrus around, sniffing him, but still won't listen to him. Gaster decides to ask around. Having two little animal skeletons can't be just a coincidence. Asks around, and no one knows where they came from, and a lot of people have just been taking care of Papyrus when Sans went missing. Papyrus is treated like a guest not an experiment. Even helps Gaster produce three more Gaster Blasters.

Gaster takes a few more months to figure out that maybe he needs Sans, not Meltdown. Tries a kind tactic to help Sans become himself again. Both physically and mentally. Doesn't work real well. Sans has been just existing for the last 3 years. He's not strong enough to fight the other 4. Gaster figures maybe they want some revenge. Some dust. Gathers up some poor monsters and throws masks on them that match his own. Let's Meltdown loose. *jazz hands* lots of innocent monsters die in a pretty bad way. But Meltdown calms downs a lot after.

A lot of the extra monster bits melt back down and Sans looks like a human skeleton now. He's kept the sharp teeth, little tail and claws. Sans doesn't remember how to walk or talk anymore. It takes a few weeks to get him to walk again, and a lot more to talk normally. Alphys is very happy to see him and helps out where she can. She can feel that Sans is just playing along with what Gaster wants, waiting for his moment. She says nothing to Gaster. 

Sans is very very unhappy when he finds out about Papyrus being there now too. Gaster of course has been very kind to Papyrus. Which helps keep Sans calmer. But now he really wants out. Gaster tries out the Blasters with Sans.

The Blasters listened to him. They did everything he asked. Gaster isn't an idiot, he's in a different part of the lab, and Sans is down in the CORE. It takes a few weeks, but Sans can control the Blasters almost perfectly. Power cuts out because another Human has fallen. Gaster of course books it down into the CORE. Bad move.

Sans is ready for him and ambushes him. Shoves Gaster to the edge of the magma, but he manages to save himself from falling. All the skulls are pointed at Gaster. Gaster taunts Sans and tells him he never had it in him to kill someone. It was never him who hurt anyone. He's too weak to finish this now. Well. Sans has had a lot of time, he has no issue shoving Gaster into the CORE. Gaster's claws just hit Sans' right cheek as he falls. Earning him his other facial scars. Very sensitive ones that hurt on cold days. 

Gaster fell right as the human did. It f*cked with the code of the world. Gaster couldn't actually die. He's stuck in a forever melting loop. His hostility and actual monstrous form infected the code of the world. Everyone gets much bigger, much more edgy, and a whole lot more aggressive. Gaster is forgotten and the history of the world has changed. Since Sans was the one there the whole time, he forgot nothing.

Sans wakes up in Snowdin. Wearing a sweater he's never seen and pants he didn't like. He tries to find Alphys. He's terrified. She can tell and makes her way to Snowdin. He asks what's going on and she's very confused. Walks him back to the lab. It looks nothing like it just did for him. It looked so small from the outside. Inside was so tiny. There was nothing there but some robot parts.

He has a breakdown and Alphys hugs him close. When he's feeling better he explains what's going on. She stares at him for a few minutes just blankly. Her eyes saying she's reliving everything, but eventually she smiles at him and says she doesn't know what he's talking about. She can't explain her scars. What are you talking about, she's always had her arms. She offers for him to stay the night and have dinner with her. To see if he feels better in the morning.

Mettaton comes by. He's a super early model and has a few issues. Mettaton is offended Sans is there, but ignores him to whine to Alphys. Sans mumbles out what Alphys can fix to make the weight lessened. Everyone is surprised. Sans most of all. He's literally never worked in robotics. Mettaton laughs because everyone knows Sans is a lazy f*cker. No way he does robotics. Alphys shoos Mettaton away.

For the first time since he first ended up in the lab. He cried. Cried for all the years he was stuck inside his head as a passenger. Cried for everything that happened. Cried because he doesn't know where he is. Almost doesn't even know who he is. Alphys held him tightly the whole time. She doesn't know what's going on. He's never had a fit like this before. Small ones, but never this bad. 

He ends up crying himself to sleep and Alphys makes him some food for when he wakes up. Checks his numbers while he sleeps. Yeah, what he said could actually lessen the weight a lot. Crazy dude. 

To Alphys this is strange. Sans was his normal hostile and idiot self yesterday. Today he's intelligent and an emotional mess. She can't explain it, and just leaves it how it is. Reality is that Gaster is chilling behind her muttering things she can't hear out loud so she thinks a certain way. 

He stays a few days until Papyrus comes and finds him. Sans doesn't feel much for Papyrus as for Sans, it's been years since he saw Papyrus. It's only been a few days for the tall now human looking skeleton. 

Sans starts to realize over a few weeks that some days and moments seem to repeat. But he's still fine the whole time. Papyrus doing the same exact thing every morning. The people of Snowdin doing the same thing. He doesn't think anything of it until a big f*cking plant attacks Snowdin, killing everyone but him. He manages to keep the roots away with a stick when a little sh*tty flower pops out.

"Who in the sandy f*ck are you?" Flowey isn't super happy because everything is supposed to always be the same. There is no way in heck this guy has ever once been outside of his house during this attack. Flowey knows something is wrong. This guy isn't normal. Even when the world is paused, this skeleton is moving away from him. Time to f*ck with him.

Sans ends up dying a lot to Flowey over the next few months, which is just the same week on loop. Until Sans figures out, well sh*t. This guy has time powers or something. He's also had enough. He can't watch his friends die anymore. He has to teach this little brat that he's not the only one who can do neat tricks. Flowey pops up to greet him only to get laser blasted and the world resets back to the start of the week. Sans starts keeping a journal after that. Things he notices, things that don't change, things that do. Also starts seeing just how powerful he is. He's got plenty of time as Flowey keeps away from him now and is messing about with someone else now. 

Sans figures out he can teleport on accident. He trips and accidentally teleports to the waterfall area. He thinks it's activated by severe panic. Until he starts experimenting a bit and realizes he can activate it whenever. First time was when he encounters the void. The dark space between areas. The stink of wet earth and whatever else I said the void smelled like. That's the first time he sees Gaster again. But the guy is now a pile of goop with a mask melted to it.

Gaster has nothing worry to say. So he just watches. Then in his left eye hole is a bunch of tiny eyes that open to stare. Which scared the ever loving sh*t out of Sans. More Gasters appear in the void over time and he starts seeing different versions of himself. He tried talking to one once, but the Gasters started shrieking. He doesn't stay too long in the void space after that.

Sans finds out about his gravity powers on accident as well. Papyrus falls and Sans tries to catch him, but misses. His power activates obviously. Papyrus is confused but also super excited because yoU CAN DO THAT TOO?! Papyrus teaches Sans how to properly use the ability. Sans finds out through this that Papyrus has anomalous abilities as well. Papyrus is able to defy gravity entirely and walk on air. But the biggest punch to the gut is that Papyrus can summon and use the Gaster Blasters. He doesn't like to because they're so devastating, but he will if he absolutely has to. Papyrus has no soul damage at all, so he just befriended the Blasters so they come to his aide.

Sans is unable to defy gravity as Papyrus does, but he can float just a bit. It tires him out pretty quickly. He finds that a lot of things do. Sleeps a lot of days. Finds out the hard way that he only has 1 HP left after everything that's happened to him.

Sans has been living for five years in this crazy loop thing. But it's only been 2 years in reality. He's 20 now. Going to be 21 soon. But he's tired. Broken down to the skeleton we know. He's got no fight left in him. Flowey is bored of him and bored of everything, so he finally let's time move normally.

It's September 15th and a human has just fallen. Word spreads pretty quickly. Sans is curious. He wants to meet this one. Mostly because he's never seen Flowey panic before. He wants to go inside the old ruins, but he's never met Toriel and from his understanding it's her home. It would be weird.

So he just hangs out in some trees outside the door, waiting. He finds out that his sense of smell is crazy strong pretty early on, but he didn't know he could smell humans so strongly. He recognized another scent on the human before they even made it to the door. Dust. This human had killed monsters on their way here. Now he's worried. 

This human seems off somehow. Like they're not in control of themselves. He accidentally falls out of the tree making a fair bit of noise. Now he feels like he has to introduce himself because they're 100% staring at him rn. 

He's super friendly and tries to be nice. But this kid is weird. Stares through him and doesn't take his offer at a hand shake. He sees them pull out a knife and easily dodges the attack. In a panic he attacks back. Which yeah. That early on a Blaster shot would kill Frisk. 

He's reset to his home. It's the same moment from when the Human fell. Which it doesn't take much for him to figure out the kid has the time powers now. 

And after a few attempted Genocide runs, a few attempted Passive runs, Frisk finally does the good ending correctly. Sans is pretty friendly through the whole thing as he doesn't fully grasp that Frisk can reset to the starting point whenever they want. Flowey only did week or month loops. Frisk does years. He can't remember exact things like he could in Flowey's days. He can only remember ideas and some people. He writes a lot of things down after that. Important information. Dangerous people and things like that. 

He's happy and everything's fine until he wakes up standing on his porch in Snowdin one day. Frisk is doing a Genocide run and that's when Sans learns that there's nothing he can do. So he gets into a routine. Figures out how each possible ending goes. Sticks to a script. Gets a lot more aggressive and starts to lack empathy with each passing run.

Until he meets you on an off chance in a good run. It's random locations. Never the same. But something about you always draws him. Like you're something that can make him happy again. He's not excited about it though. It won't last. Frisk will just take it from him one day. Yet he still runs into you every good run somehow. He does get excited for good runs after a time just because he wants to see you.

And that's essentially the story I wanted to tell. The messy slapped down quick version anyhow. It's confusing sorry, but ahhhhhhhhh. 

FUN FACTS (Aka I ramble about sh*t that is not actually fun)

Unorganized because that's my life.

The monsters that become J-1, J-2, J-3, and J-4 I'm aware I said this up top just hush do not have names or personalities. They have designs made up, but they weren't ever properly introduced literally at any point. GG me. Honestly at this point they're just aggressive blobs anyhow so….

Hi

So all the Beasttale's I saw in the tag have the Gaster Blaster heads. An now I know none of you care, but I'm telling you anyways on why I personally didn't do it. Keep in mind my Beasttale was created a few months after Undertale came out. At the time, there were no Gaster Blaster head AUs or if there were, they weren't popular yet or I didn't know about them. Bomberboy was originally a bara Sans. Which is why he was never beasty looking outside of the claws, teeth, and tail. Plus this bit*h couldn't draw animal heads at the time. For me now it seems like a cop out. Slap an animal head on and bam. It's a beast. That's no fun. For me it seems lazy but I understand why with beast in the name. I personally like the idea of beast being a more metaphorical thing.

Bombers design came about in an art trade. I didn't like the idea of just scaling Sans up to make a bara version, so I made my own. Used the design until I figured out his name and an arbitrary AU name to slap on him. At the time Beasttale was nothing more than a place to stick my own bara Sans. People started asking about him and the others, and so it expanded from there :’)

Bomberboy got his name from an unused AU idea I had about planes. Don't talk about it. He got his name from a bomber jacket...anyways I dropped the AU in favor of drawing large monsters. Bara Sans was popular at the time which is how I started.

I have literally no memory of why he was ever drawn with scars. I think to make him more intense maybe? Idk??? Either way they spawned the story I was aiming for but never got to.

The g*re/hard v*re aspect was never originally intended. I posted art saying something like ‘you have a 50/50 chance of dying when f*cking him’. I honestly don't remember why I added that comment, but either way everyone immediately hit me with that ‘OwO what's this?’ and it went downhill from there. 

I never meant for Bomber to be as violent as he got. Again it kinda went downhill really f*cking fast. It'd be something that if I made him right now, I'd have scaled back on. I just wanted him to be an a*shole and he shot past that marker 😂 I did however make sure he was never r*pey, or physically abusive. He was a horny boy, but never super forceful. He was however mentally manipulative as at the time I had a lot going on. He's gross and he was designed that way.

There was a Glitchboy, who would be a BeastBoy of Error. His design was finished, and I fully intended on introducing him, but by the time I was going to, I found I didn't really care for the original, which made it hard to love my version. I think I was just going to do it to show how the power works in my Beast AUs. Which is why I was never attached. First to last created is how it works. First being strongest, last being weakest. Cherryboy (Beastfell), Bomberboy (Beasttale), Hotboi (Beastlust), Canine (Beastswap) and Loverboy (Horrorbeast) ((Canine and Lover were made too close together for me or Sil to remember who came first, so they are tied for power)), and finally Towelboy (Dancebeast).

I liked Alphys, and the idea of her and Sans being friends. Which is why she is featured heavily in the ideas for the AU, and why I've drawn the two together so often

Bombers distaste for other AUs comes from me. Some AUs I take a liking to, but after seeing some content I don’t really agree with coming out of most AUs, I kinda dipped on them. Which is why he can tolerate Beast versions, but not their normal OG counterparts.

I had started a comic for the origins of Bomber and Alphys, but if you’ve been here a while, you know I’m f*cking lazy when it comes to my art >:'D

At some point there were like, ancient versions of the main crew. They were Gasters friends and upon their death he turned them into Alphys, Sans, Papyrus, and Undyne. The idea was scrapped and the designs were reused for Beastswapfell. 

Speaking of which. Beastswapfell was always intended to be an unstable weird AU. The regular fellswap or swapfell never appealed to me. Plus cross too many AUs and things get unfocused. 

Frisk always in any Beast AU has red eyes and Chara has brown. Why? The one time we see Chara up close, they have brown eyes. When Frisk opens their eyes in the bad version of the good end, they have red eyes. I know it's to show them being evil or whatever. But it's more fun to imagine them always having red eyes

It annoys me to no end that Sans got the cool beast thing going but no one else did. But, no one came to me for a beasty Alphys or Toriel did they. We're all here for the chunky skeleton. It's actually why I had to create a reason for Sans being how he is. He's the only one like himself. Which wasn't the original plan, but by the time the heat form rolled around, I had so many different designs for so many different characters that I wasn't about to do that to myself…

A lot of stuff was created while listening to Lauren Bousfield and Andrew Jackson Jihad (AJJ for the newer fans). So like. Yeah.

Sans and Papyrus would have been animal skeletons as kids. Sans a cat and Papyrus a badger. Magic just kinda, gave some skeletons life. This plotline was scrapped forever ago. I don't remember why. 

Bomber doesn't drink ketchup. He did it to f*ck with Frisk. Across multiple timelines because he's f*cking bored. 

I made it canon at one point that Bomber can snap and will kill everyone before Frisk does if certain requirements are met. His fight is unbeatable then. He's LOVE 20. Frisk is 0. Fight doesn't go well.

The boys heat forms all vary because drawing 6 giant pointy skeletons is f*cking boring. Go big or go home.

Canine when in heat would have sounded like  OG King Ghidorah. Love me some f*cking BIDIDIDIDI

When Sans or Papyrus die, the Gaster Blaster eye that correlates to them, will have an X in it. When looking directly at the Blasters, Gasters eye is in the center, Sans on the left, and Papyrus on the right. Gaster's eye has a pointy oval shape with a dot in the center at all times.

Monsters in this AU are incredibly lightweight. Sans would weigh all of 50 pounds. Monsters are made of magic, which has little weight. They have to eat physical things to gain some mass. Before the underground the monsters ate humans as a retaliation and because humans contained magic nutrition and physical nutrition. Older monsters still have cravings, but almost all current Monsters don't have any interest in humans for food. Sans is just ravenous and always hungry. He won't go out of his way to eat a human, but if the opportunity presents itself well...yeah.

Papyrus can and will use the Gaster Blasters if Frisk does at least three genocide runs in a row. He doesn't know why, but he just knows he has to stop them before they hit him. So he lasers their a*s the second they enter his fight. Beasttale has unfair moves in the fights 😂

The world can glitch and you are able to fall down at the same time as Frisk. Because of plot, you override Frisk and their abilities. Which forces them to tag along you and your choices. Bomber is always hurt seeing you coming out of the ruins with dust on your pants. You don't encounter him until you're at the castle if you hurt Monsters on your way. No dust means he basically glued himself to your side. Partly to keep an eye on you, partly to get close to you.

Bomber and Frisk have a rocky relationship. He knows they've done bad sh*t, but he can never remember what. This distrust can be overridden with a few good runs in a row. He forgets. Or acts like he does. He's got his journal. Says on one page that Frisk aggressively ran in circles until Monsters checked to see if they were okay. Only to be attacked by Frisk.

The picture in that you can find in the game doesn't have whatever the speculation was. I think people thought it was the good end picture that Sans has. For Beasttale it's the four monsters that now reside in Sans, posing with Gaster. They're happy. Don't know what they're about to go through. There's an old picture on my blog somewhere that looks like this, but the picture isn't canon anymore as it has Sans and Papyrus. It follows a different plot point that was scrapped shortly after the art was made.

Less of a fun fact and more of a flex. I never got any hate or flak for my choices with my AUs. Which I mean, is super surprising. Seriously. Not once was I sent a hateful message in my whole time of having this blog. I feel like that says something about my followers then and now. So thank you for suffering through my AU with me 💕 I'm sure after reading this whole thing you'll feel like you wasted your time and you're welcome. I'm glad I can still waste people's time 😂

You know who's cute? The girl I forced to beta read this 👀

[kokichi-and-co-imagine-blog]

*dramatic point* You there! *dramatic pose* Grookey, Sobble or Scorbunny?

Ooh boy…

My friend, you don’t know what you unleashed. 

Before we get started everyone, a quick and obvious Disclaimer: Know that the opinions on the starters are strictly my own and are just that, OPINIONS. They are not fact, they are not the be all and end all. Ultimately, it comes down to taste, and having different tastes is fine. And if your opinions on the starters differ from mine, that’s great. It’s only a game after all and it’s only designs for fictional magical animals. Now, with that out of the way…

Let’s get started.

Scorbunny:

When the starters were first revealed, Scorbunny was the one that jumped out to me first. Might have something to do with me seeming to like fire starters the most in general. The Charmander line (though don’t get me started on how I feel on how much Game Freak seems to pander to this thing. GIVE OTHER POKEMON LOVE GAME FREAK!!!), Cyndiquil line, Chimchar line. That’s three out of seven before gen 8. Admittedly, water types also tie that number (Oshawott line, Froakie line, Popplio line), but in gen 6 I was also a big Fennekin fan and in gen 7 I was all aboard the Litten train till I found out that they had to make my precious kitty stand on two legs. Don’t get me wrong, I like Incineroar, but I was really really hoping for some lean tiger/leopard/cheetah looking pokemon on all fours. Wasn’t a fan of the bipedal choice, but that’s just me. Though I will admit, the Heel idea was a good one.

Anyway, back to Scorbunny. Scorbunny was the first that popped out to me. It looked energetic and sweet. I was slightly worried though with the bandage on its face that this meant we were going back to fire-fighting types but I wasn’t too worried.

After a little while though I ended up changing who I wanted to use as a starter. Blame the fan-artists for that one, the flood of small cute comics for a certain water lizard (we’ll get to Sobble in a moment) kinda shifted the tide. 

By the time the 3D models were leaked, I wasn’t really planning on using Scorbunny anymore, and honestly the models didn’t help. Raboot was okay, perfectly fine design for the awkward middle stage. But Scorbunny… I don’t know, Scorbunny was WAY too human like for me. I’m not even entirely sure HOW to describe it, it just gave off that impression and it didn’t sit well with me.

When the official 2D art came out it helped a bit, but by that time I had already started the game and chosen my starter. And still, the human like feeling is still too present for me to be completely comfortable. I don’t know, it reminds me far too much of human sports anime protagonists. And I get it, that’s kinda the point with it being a soccer player but I can’t really help how I feel. I have warmed up on it though.

Admittedly, the line probably has the best, at least in terms of gameplay, signature move of the starters. And it does look freaking awesome.  

Sobble:

Ooh boy. Ooh boy.

Warning in advance guys, this is going to get kinda ranty. 

As I mentioned above, after a little time sitting with the starter designs, I ended up finding myself liking Sobble more and more. Sobble’s design is adorable, and it helps that I’m also at times feeling tons of anxiety and social intimidation. All the fanart helped too. This little guy stole my heart. I thought it was going to be perfect.

And then the 3D models leaked. 

I was not happy.

Drizzile… once again, a decent awkward middle stage, though those oven mitts for hands I was not fond of.

But Inteleon. INTELEON.

Listen, I get what Game Freak was going for. Spies are a major thing in Britain, from 007/Bond, to MI6 in the Mission Impossible movies. And it makes sense from a story stand point. The shy, easily intimidated Sobble grows up, becoming a super suave and confident spy. It fits. It honestly does.

BUT WHY DOES THAT DESIGN LOOK SO UGLY?!

Now, before we go on, going to rehash the disclaimer above. This is my personal opinion on Inteleon. If you love it, good for you. I am legitimately happy for you. It’s good that you like it, can enjoy it. I wish I could. I do not like it when I dislike a Pokemon, any Pokemon. Especially when the reason I dislike it is simply because I’m not a fan of its design.

But Inteleon. I can’t help it. I just hate it:

Those freakishly long and WAY too human-like hands on a lizard that, while I know were purposely designed, look like gloves. Yes, it goes with the spy motif, but to me it just looks awful.

The stick-thinness of its entire body. Like, its body literally looks like a rail, it’s arms and legs look like a stick-figure’s. It doesn’t even have any real shoulders! (admittedly, part of this may have to do with some… bad memories. My father passed away 4 and a half years ago from colon cancer and during the last few months of his life, he was anorexic. Scarily so. So yeah, might be some repressed stuff going on there. Of course, I could be over-analyzing this and it has nothing to do with it. Who knows?)

That stupid looking cape. Yes, I know it’s a membrane that acts as a glider. Actual lizards have this, and it helps with the spy theme. But to me, all I see is a stupid tiny cape. 

Seeing it in 3D made me just give up on the line. I just couldn’t get myself to like it. Even now, with official 2D art, I can’t get myself to like it.

And of course, that brings us to the final starter. 

Grookey:

There’s a reason I saved Grookey for last. Grookey was the exact opposite of what happened to Sobble for me. 

When I first saw Grookey I was not a fan. Oh sure, it was kinda cute, but something about the design just felt off to me. I think honestly it was the mouth. It just reminded me of a beak for some reason. Still does occasionally, though I’m much more okay with it now. But yeah, it was the least impressive to me of the first stages. I din’t hate it, but it didn’t get a reaction out of me. So I thought I wasn’t going to even consider it.

Then came the 3D leaks.

 And that changed.

Thwackey is my favorite mid stage starter this gen, and definitely ranks high up in mid stage starters over all. It looks really good, like a perfectly natural progression that doesn’t need to rely on teenage awkwardness. Yes, the teenage awkwardness is a perfectly fine design strategy, but I’m so much happier when it isn’t necessary. Thwackey just looks like an older Grookey that is now seriously considering drumming. And I love it.

And then Rillaboom. I will admit, at first sight I wasn’t blown away or head over heels like I am with some final stage starters (Infernape, Primarina, Greninja and Decidueye just to name a few), but I was fine with it. I was okay enough that I felt like going Grookey was an okay final option. Admittedly, I did consider boxing my starter for the first time ever, but after a while things changed. And I genuinely began to like Rillaboom.

The name is fun. Rillaboom is nice, and when you combine it with the usual “Go _!” you of course get Go, Rillaboom! Or, Gorilla-boom. That is a stealth pun I can appreciate.

Rillaboom’s design also grew on me. It’s a drummer and a good one. Usually I’m not a fan of Pokemon carrying around equipment as part of the natural look to them (way too many questions on how that works biologically to me) and at first this kinda turned me off when I saw the drum, but I’ve come to like it. It probably helps that the official 2D art doesn’t have it, which makes me think it isn’t a natural thing it just gets. And those dreads made of shrubs and vines. It’s nice. Plus, a grass gorilla. Thank you for this perfect opportunity to make some Dragon Ball Sayin nicknames. (My current one is named Broly. Rillaboom really reminds me of the new DB Super Broly who I really like, as opposed to the old DBZ one. But that’s a character analysis for another day.)

Ultimately though, it just has the most Pokemon-esque feel to it. I’m not a fan of people in general saying “Oh, that Pokemon is awful because it doesn’t look like a Pokemon!” but sometimes I get it. I understand that urge. And while I never would say a Pokemon is objectively awful for any reason, ESPECIALLY that reason, I can still understand it. And that’s what the other starters felt like to me. Not really like Pokemon. They are decent designs, well thought out ones. But I personally don’t like them, especially on a Pokemon.

So ultimately, TL;DR I’m on Team Grookey.

Closing Statements:

So, I know this has gone on quite a while, but I think it’s really important I end this discussion with a certain message.

It’s okay to like a Pokemon. Any Pokemon. And it’s also okay to dislike a Pokemon. Any Pokemon.

Human beings have tastes, and we all have different ones. I’m going to like certain characters, art, music, etc. that you may or may not like, and vice versa. And this is fine.

Ultimately, be kind and be respectful. 

We’re all still people and fans after all.

[energonalucard]

A FEM Team of my Own Design (RED Edition)

Usually, I don't like doing this kinda stuff. One: I don't usually share my ideas and I am very nervous. Second: FEM characters are one thing, BUT A WHOLE (TWO) TEAM makes me sweat. The good sweat, but also a nervous sweat. Because I am now sharing a personal part of my brain and my love for woman. Beautiful. Lovely. Yes. 

@medics-secret-shipfic-folder, this is one half of those FEM's I talked about! 

Is this more OC team's then canon gender swap? Yeah, and that's because I don't think that's my endgame here, I didn't make these for a gender bend AU, I made them out of love and from a community of great idea makers. I'd rather make OC's then be another generic half-hearted bending AU maker. <3 <3

Also, this really is just a dumb fact thing as I don't want to give away plot stuff. Fun facts and getting to know them a bit. 

(Yes, I said PLOT) 

═══════❖══════════════❖═══════════

-- RED Team: 

𝗦𝗰𝗼𝘂𝘁: The default FEM Scout you see around. Pony-tail, blonde like normal Scout, Bostonian. Has a bit of dimples but I swear, she'll punch you if you call her cute. 

She/Her. Straight, but an Ally. Or so she says. Nobody believes her.

But something you won't know is how many sisters she has! The answer is four. Four sisters and a single dad back in Boston. While lower on the sibling count then most Scout's she is far more likely to NOT talk your ear off in a large group... but will corner you and chat you a blue streak if your like Sniper or Spy and seclude yourself. Since she has less family to push her to run, she's a slower Scout but she can run ALL day pal. Even Medic needs a break but she keeps going, going, going...

Will beat you with heels/pumps (Spy will have loaned them) if you even offer the idea of her wearing them. Sneakers, pal, are Gods gift to feet.

Right handed, and uses left only to throw a ball or clever. Only. ONLY. 

Once drank Mad Milk. No one saw them for three days. Medic had her strapped to a table. She apparently was found in town on a rooftop at 6 AM after vomiting loud enough for neighbors to notice. She got better, but has amnesia from the incident.

Favorite weapon of all time is the Holy Mackerel, because its freaking hilarious and Spy's are disgusted by it. Also reminds her of her dad only being able to cook fish and roast back home in Boston.

𝗦𝗼𝗹𝗱𝗶𝗲𝗿: Looks like the canonical Soldier, but her hair is similar to the Battle Bob (https://wiki.teamfortress.com/wiki/Battle_Bob) but with no bangs and it barely peaking from her helmet. Blonde, American, and named John Doe respectively. 

She/Her. Bi(romantic/sexual). 

Has a thing for tank tops and will wear them around base when not on duty, because she's a very sweaty person and her clothes suffer (and who ever does laundry as well). This was a compromise. Trust the RED Team on that one (Medic approved).

Helmet 100% of the time though.

Bra comes off = be ready for a fight maggot.

Has more lower body strength, absolutely loves the Manntreads. But don't underestimate her running Original. See her on Battalion? She most likely has Rage ready when she pops out of nowhere.

Has no idea why people tell her walking around naked is weird/distracting/rude or whatnot. She's covered up! In jam (Pyro mourns their jam and preservatives cupboard)!

𝗣𝘆𝗿𝗼: Looks... exactly how a Pyro should. Like a balloon bodied Pyro. Yeah, nothing strange here other then their SASS. Dear heavens.

They/Them. Non-binary.

You've only seen these Pyro's around three or four bases in your entire LIFETIME. This walking bag of fire does not have time for ANY bullshit. Loves doing the windup middle finger when someone does something stupid/rude. Isn't really all that serious as they are made out to be but you get it.

Still loves Balloonicorn and cooking even though they act like any other merc. Has a tea set with crudely melted crayons on its outside.

Wanna get BACK here? BACK into THEIR base? Turn around and head BACK son. Backburner and Thruster Pack predator, all day unless the team suffers.

Covers up Soldier in a towel if she's naked. Sows up Demo's pants if she splits them. Engie loves them when they swing by with anything cinnamon realated. Second most likely to do everyone's laundry.

Arsonist Guardian of the Year Award. 

𝗘𝗻𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗿: Just like Scout, the typical Femgineer model but this time, she's more chubby then her skinny model on Gamebanana. Her overalls like default Engineer helps her self esteem though. Brunette, Texan, and still a shortie. 

She/Her. Bi(romantic/sexual), but leans more towards men.

Ever seen a small volcano of 5'4'' and puffy red cheecks? You've met it, you've angered it. But you ain't staying conscious for long. Not with her weilding a Southern Hospitality just for this occasion.

Has made many comments about making traps and watching unfortunate folk "disappear" from her daddy's old farm. Nobody questions why the cameras in the building have tiny barrels attached to them and a laser sight. 

Has mentioned a husband or at least a male partner once to Sniper. Never elaborated. Never showed a ring or even a smile when talking about him.

Cinnamon and jam enthusiast along with Pyro, and the most flustered when Soldier is covered in it. 

Hair bun is a must unless she ties it flat with pins. Short hair because she don't wanna catch fire. Smells like burnt metal and a dulled oil smell nobody can rinse out of her clothes. Her hardhat is permanently on her head, googles are a go too. Welding smock and overalls in and out of battle.

𝗛𝗲𝗮𝘃𝘆: Like before, like Gamebanana FEM Heavy. Brunette (like two of her sisters), Russian, and actually has scars all across her chest if you can see her shirt peak off-hours.

She/Her. Lesbian (romantically involved with RED Medic). 

You probably think Medic is the one most likely to do laundry since I said Pyro was second right? (I'm not that predictable ;>) Nope, its Heavy. Heavy doesn't like machine washers unless she has to deal with jeans or other thicker fabrics she knows won't dry in under 12 hours correctly (because they fight EVERY day). She washed unmentionables too, and does not make it weird. Until Sniper literally has to answer about why all her underwear is stained yellow, Sniper she just wants you to have nice clean clothes--

You ask Pyro for dinner if you miss a meal or have a diet going on. If Heavy catches anyone not eating, they eat double. Diets? Heavy always grew up with the mentality you ate what you could get, but Heavy is not heartless. Since food types are abundant, she is careful about diets. But she'll still make you eat it double. 

Her girlfriend doesn't eat pork products, so she understands. (Slightly)

Natasha may be her right hand gun but her doctor will always have her heart and soul. Still bought a better bed for Natasha though, but don't tell doctor. 

Once beat a male Scout cause he called her ally Engineer a fatty. Has had to fend off two Scout's from her team's Spy ("Heavy, they had information I needed." / "Intelligence? Bah."). Actually stepped on a drunk Demo's crotch on accident, but did apologise. 

Loves her girlfriends muscles way more then her curves, she has no idea why. But she can appreciation a nice bottom when she sees it. 

Two little sisters, an older brother who's tettering around step-brother, and a mother who's nearly paralyzed from the waist down. But that woman was her light, she did things not many woman do anymore and for that wisdom and learning, Heavy is grateful. Mother also instilled a fear of swatters with a shoe tied to it. Creative, but scary.

𝗗𝗲𝗺𝗼𝗺𝗮𝗻: Actually looks like The Demowoman made based on Drew Wolf's own design, but I think a bit more fuller in the cheeks and chin (more square). Scottish, eyes sharp as a sass lass, and a thick as hell skull.

She/Her. Pan(romantic/sexual).

Once cried in a pile of bras while drunk. Not her own. That's how everyone learned about Spy being... more on that later.

Has a father and mother, but both are leaning so far towards insanity she gave up listening a long time ago. Still doesn't back talk them though, she just pacifies them by dividing her money and saying she has many jobs.

Gains weight like crazy, and its not all the alcohols fault. Food is just very heavy in America and since the team is 1/3 American she feels enlarged everytime a meal based around or for the Americans is brought out. And dear god Heavy, bear goes straight to her muffin top. Spy notices her uncomfortable nature when eating and generally tries to swap out their plates (Spy fussing at the chief before dinner saying she needs X on her plate and not Y, just so Demo can keep her ideal self). (Don't tell Demo, she's too drunk to notice it)

Actually will hug Soldier when naked and be like, "Nothing weird about it". Has actually kissed Spy's hand like you'd do royalty as a joke. Has actually spun Medic around in a circle in a bear hug before. 

She's all for makeup, but really, all she can manage normally and steadily is lipstick. At least she can wipe it away if she wants (can't wipe away the pain of stabbing your only good eye with a mascara brush). 

Nobody touches her hair, never. But she likes doing other's hair. She isn't all that good with cutting or styling or maintaining hair, but playing with hair or just running her hands through it is amazing. The body hair on her legs is shaven and so are her underarms, but her arms and "moustache" that Scout notices are well grown out.

Quickiebomb Launcher Quickiebomb Launcher Quickiebomb Launcher Quickiebomb Launcher Quickiebomb Laun--

Hair always under a beany, nobody sees her hair until much later. She had it all in one wide french braid. Wait, doesn't she normally fail at braids? How did she get that? 

𝗠𝗲𝗱𝗶𝗰: (Okay, this is where similarities in the FEM models stops. To me, I don't really like the FEM Medic model as much as I should for OC's so I'll explain Medic as best I can.) Just like any male Medic counterpart and she has a square-ish chin, with curves almost as boxy as some of her cosmetics. But its a good boxy, she's wide with muscle and shoulders to carry injured teammates. Black hair, German, and the creepiest white teeth you've ever seen.

She/Her. Lesbian (romantically involve with the Heavy). Gay Energy™.

Thicc thighs saves lives. Like, no joke. She is mostly muscles in her legs and torso so everyone assumed she was good at running. Even Scout. Once lifted Demo with ease in her arms and gave Pyro a piggyback ride all at once. It did strain her back and she was slower, but she was fine after dropping Demo in a safer spot to sleep.

Her posture is shit, but she does form corrections regularly, and uses a pillow to cheat the system if she's grumpy enough.

Her teeth. God, her teeth anywhere in blue lighting make weaker mercs a bit dizzy. You've never seen teeth have a blue-green tint like hers, it feels like watching a horror movie permanently set in a blue shaded tint.

Does not eat pork products, and won't elaborate. Will eat beef, but not pork. Maybe she just hates it? Maybe. A diet? Even Heavy shrugs it off now when it happens.

Medic gives the thumbs up for Soldier walking around in tanktops. Naked Soldier is also a thumbs up. All those bras Demo collected once had Medic sorting through them happily. Actually figured out Spy's real cup size. 

Medic has banned Sniper's ace bandage bras. Not in this house, not under her roof. She fits Sniper for personally made bras, Spy bought and tailored. 

Loyal girlfriend. But gayer. Heavy is fine with it, and actually partakes in showing everyone love sometimes too. Since Demo is also affectionate, it can't be too bad.

Push-up queen, but will drop in the dirt in exhaustion afterwards. She only beats Soldier by a few points and mostly runs on spite. 

Has actually stollen all her team's uterus'. What?! She gave them all back later! Just... someone else needed them first. And in a Female vs Female war zone her teammates weren't planning on using them. But they are back now! Well... not all.

Has actually tried to make a Spyper out of an old male Spy and Sniper she used to fight. Both just despawned and targeted her the next day. Sadly. 

BLU Demo's line about shagging Medic's husband always makes her go into a laughing fit. 

Has a ring ready for Heavy, because Heavy is best wife material and loves her dearly.

𝗦𝗻𝗶𝗽𝗲𝗿: (Changed a bit too.) Taller then her Gamebanana model, and god is her face longer and more like regular Sniper. You've heard of laugh lines but the Sniper has frown lines, and the dip in her cheeks has wrinkles from the sun. She has a unibrow growing almost as fast as you can wax it, she leaves it be. So much arm hair. Brunette, Australian (New Zealand), and her hands are big for her size.

She/Her. Bi(romantic), Asexual. 

Never shaves. Never.

She has a mom, a dad, and a big brother. Her brother snipe's as well for RED Team and they have secret mail chains going between them (not so secret, Administrator knows). Her parents don't know she's Bi and after what they said to her brother about him being Trans, she never wanted to figure out. 

Her brother is actually fully transitioned with the help of a Medic who seemed pro-Trans. Of course the doctor waved that off but he had been careful about the procedure enough that they could tell he was a good doctor about all this.

Her brother is the reason she wears ace bandages for bras. So he wouldn't feel bad. She just never STOPPED wearing them after that, and she always reasoned it was because of her broken family and wanting to hold on a little longer. A "little longer" was nearly nineteen years of wearing it to help her brother mentally. Until Medic banned it. Then, she had tailored bras that were strapless but wouldn't fall down. Sometimes goes without the bra onto the battlefield and will tie her shirt off as a makeshift support. She doesn't feel she betrayed him, just... cloth is real itchy sometimes.

Jarate. Isn't... entirely enthusiastic about hygiene outside of basic shower stuff, brushing her teeth, and trimming her nails. Her underwear is clean but since jarate is... yeah, it stains her clothes. Jarate is a lot harder for females to make with how pants work.

Yes, has mooned the enemy Spy before. Not on purpose. Many times. Yes, her pride is shattered every time it happens.

Had long hair upon arrival to this war. She refused to cut it even as her team warned her about what long hair can cause. She changed her mind after the male enemy Spy yanked her around by it and smashed her head in a windowsill. She had her ally Spy cut it after she could stomach letting it be tugged, even for a cut. Spy was gentle, and asked her questions on what she prefers: suits or dresses. 

Suits mate.

(And that BLU Spy was never seen again on the battlefield after a week.)

𝗦𝗽𝘆: (Different from the model ENTIRELY, I really do not like the Spy FEM model at all. But I have grown more warm towards it lately, probably from my BLU team ideas *wink* *wink*) Wears a suit like all other Spy's, and a balaclava as well. Her shoes are as Italian as they come and could take out a man's eye they are so sharp. Blue eyes, sharp chin and nose, and she is NOT a mother.

She/Her. Pan(romantic/sexual)/Polygamous.

Is not the mother to any children at all. She does not need nor want any. Still gets all the men thought. And ladies. 

She actually does not have a uterus at all, she caught wind the doctor had taken something out of her (what Medic doesn't) and didn't want it back. Turns out, she really does not care for the missing body part. Oh well, a Spy's lose is a Medic's fortune.

Has her breasts restricted a bit by a special SpyTech bra that distributes muscle instead of pressing it all against her lungs. She looks like a D cup for her bust size. Is a E cup naturally. Medic drools when she sees the tag on the bra for the first time. Sometimes wears buisness casual around base, without her SpyTech bra and using a normal one for comfort. Attracts Demo and Soldier like flies when she does. 

Cuts and manages everyone's hair. Sniper was her first job, and that was easy. Next was Medic coming in it get a half fade. Next was Soldier to keep her hair barely peaking from the helmet. Demoman was the hardest to convince and she can only touch her hair if she "uses those leather fancy gloves" she always wears at all times while braiding Demo's hair.

That BLU Spy from before? Gutted multiple times over the course of games throughout a week. His score suffered and he was moved to a team of lesser skill. A temporary "fix" to the problem. She still wants to gut him but can't do it outside of work hours as he's employeed to BLU (costing her a contract). But did find him in a seedy city with the mother of his child, and casually reminded him of his deeds out of spite while in disguise. He apologized, but she refused to take it. She wasn't the victim. They parted ways after that and promised to never see each other again. 

Will actually hit Scout on the head. Hand open, palm ready. Right in the back of her head. Stupid American loudmouth...

Likes the Dead Ringer with the stock revolver a lot, and likes being active. Really good at acting like Pyro, its kinda scary. It's probably the sassy movements they mastered.

Third least shameful having no top on. Proven.

Has secret meetings with BLU Spy outside both base ranges. For some reason, even though the ritual of enemy teams Spy's meeting and exchanging whatever they have for whatever they need is long over they both still come out here. Probably to get away from the base and at least smoke in peace, or at least she hopes so.

-- BLU Team... (soon)

[vitalpen]

Redesign

(Yo.  Its been almost a year, Chapter 5 came out a couple weeks back, Squiggly was lookin’ for some stuff to read, and I missed this AU.  So have a little thing just talking about how scary change can be, but how necessary it is.  Not specific to Toon Henry, but using it as a setting becuase I’m (ironically) and creature of habit.  Here’s a link to a visual aid

https://squigglydigg.tumblr.com/post/166168062821/so-whatisthisnonsense-and-i-were-talking-a-little)

“Morning,” a tired man groaned his way down the stairs, still in mint green pajamas and rabbit slippers..

“Mornin’”, the cartoon character sitting on his couch, flipping through channels at a comedic speed, groaned in a similar fashion.

Henry Ross stretched a little, working out the kinks in his back and trying to wake himself up a little more.  “Where’s Alice and Boris?”

“Morning walk, the lunatics,” Bendy replied.

“Mmm,” was Henry’s only reply.  He wasn’t surprised.  Those two always did have an easier time getting up in the morning.  He was old and Bendy was… Bendy.  “How’d you sleep?”

“Dang storm kept me up.” The toon jerked a thumb upward, “Must be one heck of a bowling tournament goin’ on up there.”  In his groggy state, it took Henry a moment to realize Bendy was talking about Heaven.

“Yeah, must be,” he walked into the kitchen and looked in the fridge.  After a moment, he called back, “You eat yet?”

“Nope,” came the answer. Another thing that wasn’t surprising.

“I was thinking eggs and toast, sound good?”

“Ooh!  Can I help?”  The reply came from just on the other side of the fridge door.   Henry closed it just a little to find the toon with enormous, glistening eyes, and his hands folded next to his cheek, “Pleeeeease?”

“Sure, you can do the toast,” he replied bluntly.

Immediately the toon deflated… literally.  He just as quickly re-inflated with a nonplussed expression and an indignant puffing of his chest.  “The toast? What kind of amateur errand-boy do you take me for?”

“The kind that might still find a way to set something on fire.”  The toon’s track record in the kitchen was anything but spotless.

“You’ve got insurance,” Bendy verbally handwaved.

“And a fire extinguisher now on standby,” Henry countered.  It hadn’t been there two months ago.

With a final puff and dramatic sigh, the toon relented.  “Fine, I’ll do the stinkin’ toast.”  He grumbled his way past Henry to the breadbox and yanked the bag out.  

With a chuckle, Henry took out the egg carton and looked at the time.  “When did they leave?”

“Around half past 7.” Bendy climbed up onto the counter and sat at the ready next to the toaster.

It was about 7:50 now, which meant they would probably be back soon.  “Did they eat?”  He looked over to Bendy, who shrugged.  Henry pursed his lips for a moment, then decided against making something for them just yet.  The eggs didn’t take long to make.  If they hadn’t, he could just make some when they got home.  With that decided, he put two frying pans on the stove and grabbed a mixing bowl.  A little bit of milk, four eggs, and some mixing later, the scrambled eggs were ready to be cooked.  He melted butter in the bottom of both pans and poured the egg and milk mix into one, then cracked the last two into the other.  “Alright, put the toast in.”

“Oui, mon capitaine,” Bendy saluted and pressed the lever down on the toaster.

Henry pursed his lips again, debating something for a moment, then nodded to himself.  “Hey, can you head to my office?  In the top drawer, there’s a folder with a couple sheets I want you to grab and bring back here.”

“Sure.”  Bendy hopped off and left the room.

“Don’t look at them until you’re back in here, alright?”

“Sure, sure, keepin’ yer secrets, I getcha,” Bendy called back.  In less than two minutes, he was back, carrying a folder full of papers. He set them on the kitchen table and waited patiently.  “Sure you’re not worried about getting’ grease on’em?”

“It’s fine, we’ll be careful.” He flipped his eggs and continued moving around the slowly solidifying batter for Bendy’s.  “Open it and look at the first sheet, tell me what you think.”

With a curious raise of the eyebrow, Bendy did as he was told.  What he saw caught him entirely off guard.  The first sheet was full of sketches, designs, even a fully colored image.  He, Boris, and Alice, all looking a far cry from themselves.  He was probably the most untouched.  His solid black form, head shape, and gloves were all intact, but his limbs were a bit thicker, his proportions a bit less stretchy, face less rounded, and his bowtie was yellow.  Boris and Alice had gotten a much more thorough treatment.  Boris was sporting dark brown fur, blue overalls, and a brand new ascot.  Alice was by far the most striking.  The black had been traded for white on the dress, red on her gloves and boots, and blonde in her hair.  “What’s all this?”  He finally asked.  “You applyin’ to Hanna-Barbera?”

Henry chuckled, flipping his eggs one more time and starting to scoop Bendy’s onto a plate.  “No, just throwing some things at the wall, seeing what sticks.”  The toast popped and Bendy took the opportunity to get a rest from the new designs.

“Why?”  He asked cautiously as he climbed up and plucked the slices from their hot cradles.

Henry handed Bendy the plate of scrambled eggs and started getting his onto a plate.  “Well, the designs for you three have been around for decades.  Black and white, massive pupils, it’s something a lot of other studios have moved away from.”

“You thinkin’ of doin’ that too?”  Bendy set his plate down and held a hand out for Henry’s, still sorting out the feelings as they arose.

“Not yet,” the old man replied, offering the plate for his toast.  “But if we do, I want to make sure I have some idea on where we’d be going with it.”  He sensed the toon’s worry and offered a reassuring smile. “After all, I’ve got three very important opinions to take into account.”  They both took their plates to the table, and Henry retrieved the salt and pepper.  “Now, you’ve clearly got some feedback for me.”

“Is it that obvious?” Bendy grabbed the silverware for them and a carton of orange juice.  Henry just replied with a smirk as he set a couple glasses out.  “Well, if you’re up for a critique.”

“You don’t get by in the industry without it,” Henry replied as he sat down.  Bendy joined him, having grabbed some jam for his toast.

“Well, I don’t hate the splash o’ color, but I’m not sure how I feel about havin’ cheek bones,” the toon took a moment to tear into his eggs.  “However,” he continued with his mouth full, “I think the limbs are what looked the weirdest.  I’m used to these noodles,” he displayed his spaghetti thin arms to demonstrate, “not normal lookin’ arms and legs, you know?”

Henry nodded, the toon had been reflecting a lot of his own thoughts on the designs.  He liked them, and he knew that the three could do with some updating, but drawing them in such a starkly different way than he’d been doing his whole career, it would definitely take getting used to.  “What about Boris and Alice?”

“Well,” Bendy rubbed his chin, giving his thoughts time to form into words.  “Boris is the easier one to swallow.  He still just looks like plain ol’ Boris.  He’d probably like the ascot, when I think about it.”  He cast his eyes to Alice’s new look.  “That one gets me.”

“Thought I’d try something daring,” Henry explained.

“It’s daring, alright. Switching out the black for all this bright n’ vibrant stuff.  She looks a bit more angelic, that’s for sure,” he paused with his eyes squinted.

“But…” Henry urged.

“But it doesn’t look like her,” Bendy blurted out like he’d been holding his breath.  “You know me, I’m a ‘glory days’ kinda guy.  I like how we look, and seein’ that change is kinda hurts, you know?”  He stopped and stood up and started pacing, “But things gotta change, right?  Clinging to the past ain’t healthy,” he looked meaningfully at Henry, “we both know a thing or two about that.”  His circuit back and forth continued.  “And change ain’t always a bad thing, sometimes ya need it.  Most places are doin color shows by now, even the mouse put some red in his shorts years ago.  Most of the cartoons we make these days are in color, we’re the holdouts on that one.”  

Henry waited quietly as the toon debated himself, more than a little amused by how similar the train of thought was to his.

“But does that mean we gotta start lookin’ like the Jetsons?  Do we all gotta start wearing shit collars so talkin’s easier to animate?”  He stopped pacing and started tapping his foot with his arms crossed and his stare boring into the floor, after a moment he looked back at Henry.  “Am I overreacting?  I think I might be overreacting.  Maybe I’m just too much of an old man, scared by these new-fangled cartoons.”  He slowly made his way back to his seat, taking a bite out of his toast.  “But I don’t want us to do it too much, and lose all the great stuff we had in the first place.”  He looked at Henry again, a little lost.  “Am I making sense?”

That was when Henry finally had to laugh.  It was like was hearing his own thoughts acted out in front of him.  “More than you realize.”  He brushed the crumbs off his hands and turned to the next page.  “How about this?”

What was meant to be a glance at the sheet devolved easily into staring.  His eyes were glued to the paper, completely silent as he looked over every line, every detail.  As he looked, the toon’s lost expression changed to intrigue, then to wonder and a wide smile broke out on his face.  “Well, helloooo there, handsome.  Have we met?”  The page was filled with a second set of designs.  The first attempt had been such a tumultuous thought process afterward, he’d decided to try again.  It was always a good idea to have multiple takes on an idea anyway.  

Like before, Bendy was the most unchanged.  Instead of yellow, Henry had gone with red, changing his bowtie and the soles of his shoes. Boris was also mostly the same, with tan overalls colored different from his white face now and there was a bit of blush in the cheeks to accent the black and white.  Alice had the most done to her; like the first attempt, she’d been given a real skin tone, but instead of white and red, he’d kept the black and added some blue.  These designs also kept the more prominent eyes, just giving them whites to frame the pupils.

When he got his fill, Bendy looked up at Henry with a questioning look.  “You had these the entire time?’  With a knowing grin, Henry nodded.  “And you decided to let me have an existential crisis before you broke’em out?”

“I had some doubts and I wanted to make sure it wasn’t just me,” Henry defended.  “I didn’t expect you to get that far into it, though. Besides, I had a feeling you’d like these ones more.”  With that, he stood up and took Bendy’s empty plate, stacking it on his own.  “What do you think?”

“You’re right, I do like’em more,” Bendy grabbed their glasses and followed him, feeling oddly optimistic.  “They feel more like us, you know?  It’s not tryin’ to make us into something we’re not, we still look like we could stretch a little bit, like we belong in a slapstick show, not a cartoon family sitcom.”

Henry laughed; the comparison was fairly apt, he had to admit.  “So is that a green light from you?”

“Bright n’ shiny,” Bendy confirmed with a nod.  Henry took the glasses from him and he went to retrieve their silverware from the table too.  As they cleaned the kitchen up, the toon felt a thought nudge its way into his noggin.  It was only by the time they were done that he’d finally worked it into a question, “Change is a good thing, right?”

Henry smiled down at the toon and nodded. “It’s gonna happen anyway, so it might as well be.”

They walked to the couch Bendy had been occupying before and sat down.  “Then,” Bendy started, but stopped, forming the question a bit more before he tried to ask it.  “Why’s it gotta scare the heck outta everybody everytime it comes ‘round?”

“Because it’s usually not gonna wait for you to be ready,” Henry sat down and Bendy hopped up.  “Sometimes the only thing you can do is roll with it, try to keep up, and,” without warning, an arm hooked around Bendy and pulled him in close to the man, forcing a grunt and a chew toy squeak from the little imp, “make sure you’ve got a pal nearby to keep you going.”

Being allowed room to breathe, the toon cast a pair of annoyed, squinting eyes at the old man, then laughed.  “Yeah, well, lucky for you, I’m here, ya jerk.”

“Yeah,” Henry agreed, probably more sincerely than the imp was prepared for, “lucky me.”

[cosmicmoved]

IT’S TIME FOR MIN’S OFFICIAL INTRO... a mintro, if you will. KIM MINWOO, KNOWN AS MIN; 24 YEAR OLD POPSTAR, MEMBER OF POP DUO SO:DA. this is a muse i made back in march for a closed rpg that didn’t open so i wanted to give him a second chance! (:< i’ll write a proper bio for him soon, one that makes him sound like less of a moron, but this is just a basic rundown of his basic situation & some extra facts about him! sorry if this sucks, i can’t introduce a new muse without getting nervous for the life of me asdfghgfdfg anyway !! this gets pretty lengthy, even though it’s all just bullet points, so i threw it under a cut to save the dash. please click the read more to learn about min! if you have any trouble reading the theme, please refer to the mobile version of this post!

FIRST!! I want to be clear that Min is not a K-Pop idol, he’s a popstar. Technically, he started off in the K-Pop industry, is still ‘owned’ by a Korean company and was trained under that system but to describe him that way is no longer accurate. (i’m also very aware there’s already a k-pop idol called min but as he’s fictional, a man and, again, not a k-pop idol, it doesn’t really matter that much but m!ss a deserved better anyway)

BASICS

min is tomo’s best friend. tomo, having a lifetime of awful hollywood experience on min, was one of the first friends he made after moving to LA and they were both around the same age. they’re a chaotic combo and i love them... (i know the fc choice seems a bit too easy but i actually made both of these characters totally separately & making tomo made me want to give min another shot so i decided to lump them together)

full name is kim minwoo (김민우 / 金玟雨 / kim min-u) but he goes by MIN, both as a stage name and a nickname. call him either min or minwoo, he doesn’t really care either way. (he’s fed up with people pronouncing the W...it’s silent...)

birthday: 12th June 1995. he’s 24 years old.

nobody can tell whether or not he’s a jerk because he’s essentially a nice person. is it false bravado or does he just lack tact? is he just a part-time bastard? like.....he’s not mean, he’s a good person, he cares about other people!! ...but he’s also kind of a brat & he’s VERY stroppy. he gets upset if stuff doesn’t work out the way he wants it to.

he’s a member of the pop duo, SO:DA; an okay singer, more of a rapper, but a solid dancer. also very much known for his look, something about which he’s more bitter than he lets on. (he pretends to eat it up but he actually finds it pretty frustrating, a direct contrast to tomo who loves being the designated Pretty Boy so long as it’s not in clean, shiny way; if ur gonna call min pretty a bunch of times, compliment him somewhere else too at least once if u don’t want to end up on his list of enemies)

SO:DA debuted in south korea back in 2014 but the company made the decision to move it abroad a year later in an attempt to globalise their output. it’s hard to consider them as a k-pop group as they’ve been based in LA for 4 years now and they release music entirely in english. (pls don’t mention super m to me, i made this character in MARCH asdfghgfdfh)

the group’s name was originally short for SOL & DAL, taken from the french word for sun (soleil) and the korean word for moon, but they dropped it after the move abroad. min was the member who represented the moon while his partner in the group was the sun. they’ve sort of kept the concept in terms of visuals and all the rest but they mostly don’t speak about it.

min actually grew up in the UK. born in seoul, moved to a london when he was four and then moved back to seoul when he was thirteen and then to LA when he was eighteen.

EXTRA TRIVIA

min’s not as into partying as tomo so like...he’ll go along with it and go to clubs with tomo but usually doesn’t drink as much & often ends up in charge of dealing with the aftermath of tomo being an idiot. min doesn’t really mind bc he’s used to people trying to chase after him & being treated like an irresponsible child so he likes being the responsible one for once. (actually, he’s just a much tamer character than tomo in general. i think the same heavier topics will come up by virtue of him being a big part of tomo’s plotline but, in isolation, min’s less intense. min doesn’t take any drugs, for one thing; it’s part lack of interest, part he’d never get away with it like tomo does)

min isn’t allowed to do wild shit in public or else his management will come down on him like a tonne of bricks but he likes the idea of the Bad Boy image so he kinda...mooches off of tomo for the street cred. like they’re genuinely best friends and he’s not using tomo or anything shitty like that but i can’t say that min doesn’t enjoy being seen as trouble by proxy.

got banned from club penguin when he was ten for saying fuck. (more than once bc saying it once only gets you banned for 24hrs.) it was his first experience with resenting authority for enforcing their rules on him 😔

he likes to keep this sort of...mysterious, tortured image but his upbringing was actually fairly ordinary. he gets on with his family and loves them a lot. nobody’s dead, there’s no awkward relationships.

he has two siamese cats, both aged about 3 years. they have their own instagram account that’s about 40% run by min and 60% run by his manager when they have nothing better to do (usually after min has spammed them with pictures he’s taken). in conclusion, they are baby.

this has actually resulted in them having to separate their channels of contact by purpose; one messaging service will be used for important stuff, one will be used for casual stuff, one will be used exclusively for social media (cat pics & selfies), so on and so forth.

his management won’t let him get tattoos and he’s mad about it. like to the point that he’s been known to wear fake tattoos occasionally. do NOT clown him for it. he won’t take it.

actually, min’s management is just very controlling and overbearing & he’s totally overworked but hahaha we’re just going to ignore that bc arguing with the people in charge means risking your dream career in music & potentially losing it all, esp bc you skipped out on uni and fucked up a lot of high school just to pursue this job hahaha let’s just internalise that shit and get on with it

owns the cherry coke aesthetic. actually thinks classic coke is better. shhh, don’t tell. his favourite sweet is basset’s cherry drops though hehehe (not that he gets to eat them very often, given i can’t imagine they’re easy to find outside of the uk)

actually drinks too much coca cola. that probably explains the stroppiness, as well as his awful sleeping patterns.

pepsi can get fucked

min claims to be a vegetarian.

min is not a vegetarian.

the backstory there is pretty simple; min’s fussy. he has particular tastes. most kinds of meat, esp red meat, do not fall into his OK Zone. instead of having to suffer through important, fancy meeting dinners with posh steaks and not being allowed to use his fussiness as an excuse, he started claiming he was a vegetarian. people seemed to be more accepting of that. the only trouble is that he’s now widely known as a vegetarian when he doesn’t actually give a shit. the only people who know he’s bullshitting are his friends. he just wants a mcdonald’s double cheeseburger.

min lives on a diet of utter shit. he’s contractually obliged to eat healthily when preparing for promotions so he doesn’t just fuckin collapse on stage from malnutrition. pls eat a vegetable.

o yea he’s petty as fuck. wrong him like...once...and it’s fuck u city.

also he currently has silver hair. he’s icy...u see that he’s icy......i know the graphic is pink hair but i made it as a sidebar for smth like a year ago and i wanted to reuse it (:<

ALSO !! uhhhhhh, if anybody’s interested in rping the other half of SO:DA.........pls let me know asdfgfdf i’d literally LOVE for someone to take that role hehehe! p much everything is up to you besides a few requirements; he has to be close enough in age to min, probs not too different in build (duos always kind of have?? a sorta physical symmetry??) and he's a vocalist. the personality is totally your call but there has to be that sunny image. fc and everything else is your choice too but i’d have to be chill w/it & agree that it works asdfghdd!!

[neverwatchedonepiece]

529-530: "The Fish-Man Island Will Be Annihilated?! Sharley's Prophecy!" and "The King of the Fish-Man Island! Neptune, the God of the Sea!"

A rare image of Hordy Jones stepping on a lego.

Only had time for two episodes tonight. Luckily, there was enough in them to write about: including the reveal of a villain (always exciting!)

His name is Hordy Jones. He is angry, he is a Fishman, he looks oddly like the guy from ACDC and he has... a dog slung round his neck?

Not to mention the prophecies, designer boutiques, royal invitations and awkward questions.

Dreams Do Come True in Fishman Island

The episode opened with Luffy, Usopp and Chopper rushing around the harbour town, looking for a human - any human - who could donate Sanji’s blood type.

Luckily, a pair of nice okama stepped up and saved Sanji’s life. Of course, when Sanji regained consciousness, he freaked out. Usopp and Chopper both had to remind him to thank the okama. Come on, Sanji. Not cool. They saved your life in a place where donating blood is an act of great political significance. Show a little gratitude, eh?

While taking a break from Sanji’s fool antics, Chopper examined a strange mark on Luffy’s arm. Turns out it was poison! Luffy took a hit from Hyouzou (how did I miss that?) Chopper declared it very potent and wondered how the hell Luffy survived it. He asked if Luffy had ever been poisoned before.

Oh boy, Chopper. Does Luffy have a story for you. It can be told in one word: Magellan.

(Seriously, though, did Luffy not tell the Strawhats what happened to him while they were sailing, or was it all so next level that being poisoned to near death was not one of the major highlights?)

Camie, who had come to see how Sanji was doing, took Luffy and Usopp back to the Mermaid Cafe dorms. On the way, they called in to see Madame Sharly: a beautiful shark mermaid with premises at the back of Mermaid Cafe. (I think she might own the cafe because she gave Camie the day off to show the Strawhats round Fishman Island?)

Not Unless You Play the Lottery

Oh, and she is also a dab hand at crystal ball fortune-telling and has been since she was little. She has correctly predicted a few cataclysmic events, including the war in Marineford and Whitebeard’s death. Recently, she’s stopped using the crystal ball because she can’t stand knowing bad things will happen. I suppose Whitebeard is the kind of guy that would go to war no matter what. I can’t see anyone convincing him otherwise, even if it was someone like Sharly, who knew he’d be killed in battle.

I wonder if she’s been burned before by using the crystal ball? She was all dramatic and stared off into the middle distance when she said, “It’s better not to know the future.” Something has clearly gone wrong in her life that she has that attitude to such a strong power.

Luffy, who seems to be living on another planet at the moment, said, “All very well and good but do you know how mermaids poop?”

That’s right, Luffy. Always asking those important questions!

It was round about then that Camie realised she’d forgot to deliver the clams to Pappagu! So they hurried off to find him at another, fancier cafe up in Fishverly Hills (lol), where they found Brook, aka Soul King, living it up with Pappagu and a couple of mermaid fans. (I love how famous Brook is in his own right and not just as a member of the Strawhats.)

There was a lot of good world-building here. Courtesy of Pappagu, who tried so hard to be a Good Exposition Starfish (why won’t anyone listen to him?), I now know that Merpeople don’t eat meat and fish (but Fishmen do). That King Neptune runs the Island. That, if a Merperson and Fishman marry and have kids, any children they have will either be a Merperson or a Fishman, not a harmonious amalgamation of both. 

And the good news is that the Flying Dutchman/Captain Vander Decken stuff was not a random encounter character to be used once and disposed of! Not sure what his role will be yet, but Oda seems to have something planned, as he has been given backstory. Turns out Brook was right about the original Flying Dutchman crew being several hundred years old, but the original Captain Vander Decken reached Fishman Island and died there. The one manning the Flying Dutchman now is Vander Decken IX, his descendant. Apparently, the guy has a bounty and the whole island’s been looking for him for ages because he started sending unwanted love letters, packages and threatening marriage proposals that scared the princess to the point a warrant was issued for his arrest.

Looks like someone can’t take no for an answer, eh?

But the most interesting thing was this.

Big Momma’s House

Luffy noticed the sign on a candy factory. Pappagu explained that when Whitebeard had shuffled off his mortal coil, the role of Fishman Island Protector became vacant.

The position was filled by Charlotte Linlin (or Big Mom, to the rest of us): one of the four (now three) Yonkou. She hasn’t been mentioned since Thriller Bark, so I was excited for that miniscule teaser Oda gave. 

Big Mom demands loads of candies as a fee for her protection. This confused Luffy. “But she’s protecting this land after old man Whitebeard died? Isn’t she a good person?”

Pappagu shrugged, as only starfish can. “Whitebeard didn’t demand anything, but maybe Big Mom sees protection more as a business.”

Interesting... she’s definitely a different kind of Yonkou.

But I didn’t have time to think about it for long because the action switched to Sharley, who had burst out onto the street, freaking out about Luffy, begging everyone she could  grab hold of to “find Strawhat Luffy and throw him out of this country!”

Wait, what...? Wasn’t she happy to see them ten minutes ago? Why? What had caused the change of heart?

Apparently, she saw a vision of Luffy in her crystal ball: an image of him surrounded by fire. “At Strawhat’s hands, Fishman Island will be destroyed!”

Eh? Surely not. There has got to be some mistake here. There is no way Luffy would sink Fishman Island. Or at least not on purpose. That is the only way I could believe Sharley’s vision would ever come true.

Hmm....

This Guy Is So Hard, He Puts Sharks in Sweaters

Cliffhanger over, I steamed straight onto episode 530. After a dark and mysterious opening (more on that later), the action cut back to the Strawhats. Pappagu was explaining his job. Turns out he’s not just an adorable starfish on land: in Fishman Island, he is a Super Influencer: a rich designer and president of the Criminal Brand clothing company - a famous fashion line.

As they approached one of his shops, the Strawhats heard some serious, weapons-grade haggling within. 

Of course it was Nami! 

The harassed shopkeeper was pleased to see Pappagu. This lasted until his boss told the Strawhats they could have as much free clothing as they liked in return for saving his ass at Sabaody.

Pappag, that was a rookie mistake. Never tell pirates they can take as much free stuff as they want. THEY ARE PIRATES! xD

But that was not the only drama going down in Fishverly Hills. Outside, there was a commotion. The Strawhats, Camie and Pappagu went to check why everyone was shrieking.

King Neptune had arrived. The big, bearded, booming-voiced ruler of Ryugu Kingdom and Fishman Island. Golden rays of light bathed the spectators. I wondered why he kept mispronouncing the word “ham” in Spanish.

It was the first time Camie had ever seen him. The King only descended from the Upper World if there was trouble. He hadn’t brought guards. Very strange! Ryugu Palace is a sacred place for Fishmen. A celestial place where ordinary people aren’t allowed to go. Where the princes and princess live.

The King turned and said, “Oi, Megalo. Are you sure these are the guys?” When the cute, sweater-wearing shark popped out of nowhere and confirmed (I love that it has a name), King Neptune invited the Strawhats to Ryugu Palace.

“Is there good food there?” Luffy asked. Priorities, amirite?

“Of course. We’re planning a banquet,” Neptune answered.

Luffy couldn’t have accepted any quicker. He piled onto Neptune’s fishboat with Usopp, Nami and Brook, then looked back. “Aren’t you coming?” Camie and Pappagu were frozen in awe.

“We don’t deserve to go to Ryugu...”

That was the Wrong Answer. Rank and status does not impress or intimidate Luffy (and that’s one of the reasons I like him so much). He told them to stop being dumb and get on. 

It’s funny how the rest of the Fishmen and Merpeople are so awed of Neptune, yet he was completely unbothered when Luffy invited some commoners to his house. Neptune is either more chilled than he seems, or he is up to something.

But not everyone is as enamored with King Neptune...

This Guy Is Not A Fan

This is the Fishman behind the New Fishman Pirates: Hordy Jones. 

Now, I can’t help but compare this guy to Arlong. He’s a shark fishman and he has similar views to Arlong.  

Hell, Arlong was the first real villain I took to in One Piece. The first real threat. He did horrific things. I’ll never forget that black and white scene when he shot Bellemere in the head. When Nami broke down and Luffy laid his straw hat on her head. Then there was the walk to Arlong Park. All those iconic moments.

Hordy Jones has big shoes to fill. It’s early yet, so I’ll wait until I’m further in to make any judgments. When I first watched Thriller Bark, I was kinda bemused by Moria, then he ended up one of my favourites. 

This guy has got a hold of some Fishman Roids and likes necking a ton to gain super strength. Apparently, the Roids shorten lifespan but Hordy does not care. When a bunch of escapee human pirates were reported for desertion (they must have met Hammond and enlisted. Now I think I know why there haven’t been many visitors to Fishman Island lately!) Hordy ate a meaty fistful of those Fish Roids like they were candies someone had packaged up for Big Mom.

Then he swam off and deliberately crushed the deserters while handcuffed to show how strong he was. It was cool the way he punched through the ship like a cannonball. He also let the hapeless crew live because: “Humans killed Fisher Tiger and shattered Arlong’s dreams. The dark and tragic history of Fishmen Island will end with us, the New Fishmen Pirates. You humans, survive with cuts and bruises to show the people on earth what happened to you in the sea, and who you met. Tell them how horrendous it was. We’ll capture the centre of the world, Fishman Island, from the gutless god of the sea, Neptune, and drag you humans down to the dark sea bed. You’ll all learn that the Fishmen are the superior race.”

I can tell he’s ambitious, is this Hordy Jones.

Unfortunately, the very same humans who crushed Arlong’s dreams have just landed on Fishman island. And he knows it. I wonder what he’ll say to Luffy when he meets him. That should be an interesting conversation.

Oh yeah, and Caribou has escaped the barrel because some mermaids opened it. No idea what he’s up to now, but it won’t be anything good.

Say yes to drugs on Fishman Island!

[i-am-the-entertainer]

A Mid-Volume RevieWBY

Let’s be honest. Most of us were holding our breath for the entire hiatus: we’ve been burned before by this show.

RWBY has always been a show with potential, but has been unable to get as big as it wants to be just due to the nature of how it’s made. Rooster Teeth is still an independent production studio, they can only put out so many episodes a year, and for the past two volumes it was just two guys writing basically everything.

It’s also worth pointing out that RWBY wasn’t originally a masterpiece on its own. What made it stand out was a) the fact that the mostly comedy-driven Rooster Teeth was making an original IP and b) the fights. People jumped onto this show because even if the animation quality was subpar, the vocal performances were all over the place, and the writing was slow as hell, there was charm to it, and part of that charm was watching the show gradually improve.

Which is why everything started to feel stagnant when the show stopped improving. Sure, they upgraded to a more professional-looking animation engine, they started hiring more professional voice actors and the original cast’s performances improved with experience, but with the loss of the series’ creator, visionary, and key animator, the ability to have epic fights was lost, as was a major guiding force for where the show could go. Couple that with key missteps in major storytelling in Volume 4 and 5 (including storylines that were just completely dropped or failed to receive any focus) and wildly inconsistent fight quality from chapter to chapter, the show was getting so many things wrong. Yeah, some of the criticism was just unnecessarily toxic, and I recognize the CRWBY’s discomfort at the level of hate they were getting (no one’s forcing you to watch the show, people), but seriously, it got to the point that even some of the show’s more positive fans were calling RWBY out for its problems. These issues were finally acknowledged by the team in a Reddit AMA following the Volume 5 finale, and they promised they would try to fix them. Miles himself posted this:

A couple of us went into this Volume with cautious optimism. While Volume 5 had been a disappointment, some of the new guiding philosophies they were claiming to use to fix RWBY for the next Volume had been used surprisingly successfully for Nomad of Nowhere. Everyone thought that show was going to be another cancelled-after-one-season failure for RT Animations, but surprisingly it turned out to be one of their best shows. If they could create another entirely new world and actually do some really good storytelling, maybe there was hope for RWBY.

If you saw the Volume 6 premiere in theaters like me, you may have watched with baited breath. They felt the need to screen the last hour of Volume 5 first, which just served as a reminder of how disappointing the overall product had been. Then they showed a behind the scenes video where the CRWBY discussed changes to the pipeline: a new co-director for the series, an actual writing team to assist Miles and Kerry, the animators being given more control on certain scenes, etc. etc. Overall, suggesting “We heard you and we’re going to try to improve.”

And then the first episode was shown. And honestly? It was pretty good. Good balance of humor and action while starting up some of the major storylines of the season. The fight scenes were well-choreographed, they’d clearly spent a lot of time working on the episode, they even had time to add little details and quirks to the character. It’s probably one of the best premieres of the entire show: it felt like it was doing a better job of marking a new era for the show than the Volume 4 premiere had been trying to do.

So, let’s assess how things have gone, at least so far.

Focus

This has been the biggest improvement for the show. The big problem in Volume 4 and 5 was having the team split up and attempting to give each their individual focus, while also giving secondary characters basically the same amount of focus, which was waaaay beyond what this kind of show could do. There were simply too many story threads and events going on that made following the show fun to watch––whole storylines would be dropped for several episodes at a time. I mean, the whole reason the Apathy didn’t appear in Volume 4 despite what they’d planned was because there just wasn’t any time to include them. As of now, there are only two major story threads we’ve been concerned with: Team QRWBYOM and Team Melted Ice Cream. A third could be Salem’s faction, but they’ve only had one scene so far: I suspect they’re going to play a more major role in the second half of this volume, though, considering they were waiting for the heroes to reach Argus. A fourth is Adam, but he also has only had one actual scene so far, I wouldn’t be surprised if they pushed him aside for the first half so they could focus on the main characters and he’ll have a bigger role later on.

This renewed focus has allowed us to finally get some proper interaction within the main team, plus actual character development. So, good on that.

Pacing

So much better. Volumes 4 and 5 relied way too much on cliffhangers to get people to come back each episode, instead of relying on a story playing out in single chapters. When I say cliffhangers, I mean cutting off a key story moment in the name of shock or not allowing the episodes to stand on their own. We’ve gotten a lot of episodes with an individual focus where they could potentially stand as an independent episode of the show, even the more arc-like episodes like what happened with Brunswick Farms: "The Coming Storm,” the second episode of that arc, had the Cinder vs. Neo fight that everyone adored and some amazing interactions with Blake and Yang and Weiss and Ruby.

I had a concern that having major revelations/moments in only the first few chapters was going to kill the pacing for the entire volume, and I still kind of have that concern. That said, I am surprised that they’ve kept up the momentum this far into the volume, so I’m cautiously optimistic. With maybe the exception of Chapter 4, each episode had a major story beat that packed a punch the volume needed to keep going.

Tone

This has been another problem for the past two volumes: the show kind of established itself with the anime vibe of visual comedy mixed with legitimate drama, but hasn’t really kept up that momentum volume-to-volume. In the cases of Volumes 4 and 5, they both began with some anime-like humor but failed to use it consistently. These seven chapters, meanwhile, have been pretty consistent in delivering those humorous moments: even Brunswick Farms, the most horror-based arc in the series thus far, has some laugh out loud scenes.

And on that note: the horror elements of the Brunswick Farm arc were really well done. Sure, there was no way anyone was going to die, but that doesn’t really matter (repeat: THAT DOES NOT MATTER, CERTAIN PEOPLE) because a combination of writing, animation, and even sound design made for a couple of episodes that were legitimately terrifying.

Animation

I don’t want to make too many calls on this because I’m not that great at assessing this kind of thing (writing’s more my forte), and @hypeathon writes some really great analyses on the topic, much better than I ever could. But overall I think it’s safe to say the animation quality has really improved. You can really tell with certain episodes that more time was spent to make them look their best, especially Chapter 1, which had these little touches that I wouldn’t have expected at all from the show five years ago. Minus a couple of animation errors here and there, things are looking good. No random teleportation, all the fight scenes we’ve gotten have been sufficiently epic, they’ve been placed at points in the show that satisfy our epic fight cravings, overall, good work. Kind of the payoff to the mention from the premiere documentary that they’re leaving a lot of creative decisions in the hands of the animators, which has overall made a much prettier-looking show.

Character Development

One of the problems of juggling multiple storylines in Volumes 4 and 5 was that we weren’t given a whole lot to work with in terms of character development: a lot of it seemed to just happen offscreen, we weren’t really shown what changed a character from the start of a volume to the end of one. The biggest victims of this problem were the core four, who were often pushed aside in favor of development for side characters. Ruby has been the biggest victim of this problem, with a planned arc about her survivor’s guilt in Volume 4 getting pushed aside to focus on Ren’s story, and only really getting one legit moment of development in Volume 5 in her brief talk with Oscar. Yang’s arc about recovering from the Battle of Beacon was almost non-existent in Volume 4, with only a few drops of it popping up at moments in Volume 5 that didn’t form a cohesive development arc. Blake and Weiss actually had a decent arc, but Weiss wasn’t given a whole lot to do in Volume 5 and then kinda sorta got fridged for an episode or two.

With the characters reunited and a renewed focus on the core team, we’re finally seeing some actual on-screen development. Chapter 5 “The Coming Storm” is the clearest example of that, with the team dealing with the fallout from Jinn’s story in (what appeared to be) a lower-stakes setting. Key moments included Blake and Yang’s interaction, which brought the much-desired angst everyone was waiting for, knowing how betrayed Yang felt when Blake abandoned her at the end of Volume 3. Ruby and Weiss, who were set up from the beginning of the whole show as partners, weren’t really interacting a lot, even when they reunited midway through Volume 5. We get a nice moment of their dynamic while they’re looking for food.

Jaune

Well. That might explain why he’s gone for most of the first half.

(listen rwde, they’re never gonna get rid of him completely. He’s an established character, they can only push him aside for most of the volume, stop chasing your tail and get over it already. If they abruptly killed him I’m sure you’d be celebrating but all of us would be thinking “What...what purpose does that serve to the overall plot?”)

Storytelling

This is probably the best Volume in terms of storytelling. After years of World of Remnants and exposition dumps delivered by characters standing around talking, the philosophy of “Show, don’t tell” finally actually happened on this show. Flashbacks, which didn’t happen much (if at all) before, were finally used, and we ended up with some great material: again, the Grimm Reaper flashback in Chapter 7 continues the volume riding high on good quality fight animation, but also gives us a sense of the world the characters inhabit. More than before, a lot of minor things in this world are implied rather than fed to us, like the danger Silver-Eyed Warriors have to live with, the efforts people will go to to live out normal lives in Grimm-infested territory, etc.

I brought this up earlier, but Chapter 3 “The Lost Fable” was basically to RWBY what “El Rey” was to Nomad of Nowhere: a massive lore-dump that provided some much-needed context to what the heroes were doing, completely changing the stakes of the show up to that point and potentially changing the course of everything for the rest of the season. And we desperately needed that kind of episode, where we were shown instead of told the background of Ozpin and Salem, instead of just blindly thinking “Here’s the good guy and here’s the bad guy.”

And yet if I’m being honest, I can’t say I really liked it. I’m not sure why, maybe I’ve gotten cynical like the rest of the angry commenters on YouTube, it feels a bit like this is happening way too late, like it should not have taken this many years for something like this to be revealed, or there should have been a much better buildup to that reveal. At the same time, I understand that some major events in RWBY’s production (the least of which was the way too large scope of Volume 4 and the biggest of which was the shocking loss of its creator right when the show was about to enter a shift in tone) meant any proper buildup had to be killed in favor of telling cohesive stories volume-to-volume. So yeah, I can’t say I liked that episode individually, but I know the greater purpose it serves to the show so it doesn’t really bother me that much.

Conclusions

I try to be positive with my reviews of RWBY, especially considering how vitriolic reviews of this show can get. That said, this volume’s not perfect. The big criticism I have right now is that this is a show that wants to tell an epic story on a grand scale but can only tell it in fourteen 10-20 minute episodes per season. It doesn’t help that the last two volumes were the attempted execution of that plan, while this one seems to be scaling that back so the show doesn’t lose focus. But that’s just my issue with how the show has tried to established itself in the post-V3 era and how we’re no longer getting that. I think the biggest improvement this show could have would be longer episodes, and I could sacrifice having a volume per year if it meant they could spend more time on the episodes and tell the big story they want to tell. But I know Rooster Teeth can’t function as a production studio while only putting out one volume of RWBY, its flagship show (sorry RvB), every few years. Actually, I suspect that might be the model gen:LOCK is gonna follow, considering the first season alone has taken a year and a half to produce.

At the conclusion of Volume 5 I remarked that even though it was a disappointment, it was an obvious step in the creative direction the show needed to go in. Even if the fight animation was very often subpar and it felt like they were trying to clean things up after Volume 4 got too big to handle, there was a better blend of storytelling and action.

This volume so far has been the payoff. I haven’t felt the urge to seethe through my teeth with disappointment after a single episode this volume: each one was satisfying in its own way, I no longer feel like I have to keep track of 200 different characters and what they’re up to, and I walk away from the fight scenes feeling like something epic actually occurred rather than “Okay, so they punched things defied gravity and that somehow defeated their enemies.”

Yes, there are problems, but the show is showing clear signs of improvement. I think it’s safe to say after seven fairly good episodes that Volume 6 could very well become the best volume of RWBY. Any clear issues with the story and scope for this volume should’ve come up by now, and nothing really comes to mind. As far as I’m concerned, as a serialized TV show RWBY is succeeding. Whether that will all payoff for the final overall volume? Well, we’ll have to wait til the finale airs in February.

[husbaano]

Final Fantasy XV: Pocket Edition HD Review: A Bite-Sized Disappointment

Final Fantasy XV is a staple for modern day Square Enix that has one of the most bizarre development cycles and releases in gaming. When it originally launched for consoles in 2016 it had been 10 years since its conceptual reveal trailer, underwent both a system change as well as a director change, and a 3 month release delay. After such a long developmental cycle the game receive mediocre  reviews including from myself who was extremely confused to how the game was considered “finished” in the first place with laughably unexplained cut scenes, bad animations, a simple combat system with no depth and just overall lack of polish; all of that development time and the game just ended up being bizarre and incomplete. Square Enix even stated that this was intentional in order to promote a “games as a service” model in order to keep providing for the consumers. Final Fantasy XV has continued to grow as its own brand since its release nearly 3 years ago with a full length feature film, an anime series, two mobile games, DLC and free updates to further “polish” the game. Square Enix is continuing to expand the reach of this multimedia powerhouse with the release of Final Fantasy XV: Pocket Edition for the Nintendo Switch, PS4 and Xbox One; an HD port of a “demake” originally made for mobile platforms. This demake somehow manages to capture the spirit of the original while adding some minor adjustments to make the originally once bumpy road trip a little smoother.

Final Fantasy: Pocket Edition HD retains the exact main plot from the original console release, even going as far as using the same audio and cutscenes; just chibi-fied. Set in a fantastical modern land, or a “fantasy based on reality”, Prince Noctis of the kingdom Lucis, must travel with his three companions to be wed to Lady Lunafreya of Tenebrae to complete a peace treaty. Thing don’t go exactly as planned as the peace treaty is very soon breached by the enemy nation, Niflheim, and the four boys must go on a journey to save the people of Lucis. In the original release I was baffled by how little of the story there was in the main game; a good chunk of it was found in supplemental material, specifically the anime series and the movie, like how the four boys became friends and how the peace treaty was breached in the first place; all of which are kind of crucial to the plot. To put it frankly the original story was a mess, important battles and events occur off screen, characters aren’t introduced or have purpose but the player is expected to care about them, time-skips happen often, almost no time is spent on the rival empire Niflheim and a lot of the characters associated with it go nowhere. It's just a weird occurrence when a randomly introduced man named Jared gets three main story quests devoted to him when the main antagonists get no screen time, some characters even only appear for one in the entire game. The main four characters,  Noctis, Ignis, Prompto and Gladio, and their “roadtrip” are meant to be the heart and soul of the adventure; and they really are. Their interactions are charming, amusing and downright funny I love the brotherly bond the four share throughout the journey and during gameplay; its just annoying to realize that there is no in-game explanation as to how the four became friends in the first place! The story was, and is still, definitely a mess but the game developers tried to alleviate some of these issues through updates and DLC; although not perfect, the game is in way better shape than it was when it originally released.

Final Fantasy XV: Pocket Edition HD contains most of the major hiccups of the original release since its story is almost 1:1 with the original just with a new coat of paint, but it still manages to improve in some areas. One thing that stood out to me the moment I started it was the added “context” found before cut scenes; text blurbs occasionally appear to inform new players about the lore and the general story which helps comprehension immensely and is something that should have been in the original release to begin with. Another way Pocket Edition HD improves upon the story is by providing NPC dialogue strictly regarding the plot; this helps with world building and keeps the player invested in the story. One of the most common complaints about the original release was the lack of urgency since the plot seemed very “linear” but the game itself  was open world so a lot of that plot tension was lost. Since Pocket Edition HD is a linear experience, the plot isn’t lost upon the player and is almost always the focus.

The entire game has been compressed into a cute, chibi art style that is very similar to the 2007 FFIV Remake for the Nintendo DS and 2013’s Bravely Default for the Nintendo 3DS. The art-style is distinct and translates the character designs well but the animations leave a lot to be desired. It feels as though they cheapened out on animations during cut scenes rather than it being part of the “demake” experience. The voice clips are all ripped from the console edition so some dramatic scenes come off as goofy rather than emotional. Pop-in is common and the game chugs while in docked-mode; in handheld mode the game runs at a smooth 60 fps most of the time. The menus are nothing special either; they feel pretty empty, boring and bare bones. It's not horrible for a mobile title, but for a $30 Nintendo Switch game this is bit disappointing. 

Pocket Edition HD takes the console version and streamlines it to become a linear adventure rather than an open-world one. The world of Eos in the original release was vast but empty; it was just big for the sake of being big with nothing to do. Pocket Edition’s linearity is actually a benefit since the game seems a lot more focused, the plot is more cohesive and it feels more like a game rather than a walking simulator. The combat system has been overhauled but not for the best. As someone with 90 hours in the original release, I learnt the “depth” of the combat system but it wasn’t entirely enticing; it eventually watered down into mashing warps and holding buttons to block every attack in the game. It wasn’t deep or engaging,it kinda was just there. Now PE: HD takes this already watered down combat and dilutes it down even more. Each party member fights on their own while the player can only control Noctis. A single button is held to automatically attack the enemy you’re targeting, while occasional prompts appear that give you the option to perform a special attack with one of your teammates. Noctis can warp-strike to any enemy on the field at the cost of MP, and occasional QTEs can give you a brief window in which an incoming attack can be dodged or parried. The combat system is very bare-bones and fun at first, but it begins to drag once you realize it doesn’t get any more intricate. It’s stale and just plain easy;  there is almost no challenge whatsoever. You can pause the game at any time to consume many readily available Potions to restore HP and the enemies go down fast. 

In a similar fashion, the progression system is a watered down version of the console version. XP is awarded to party members after each battle and is applied at the end of each story mission. Leveling up party members allows for upgraded stats and AP to be gained. These Ability Points can be used on the bare-bones skill-tree to obtain new skills for the party; the skill-tree is just kinda basic and boring especially taking into consideration that enemies die easily to basic attacks as is.

Final Fantasy XV is Square-Enix’s new cash-cow and as such is being distributed to every platform imaginable. Square’s newest venture with the XV brand, Final Fantasy XV: Pocket Edition HD is a bizarre one and tough sell. This mobile app “demake” up-scaled for HD on the Nintendo Switch is a strange concept that lands in the story department for the most-part but lacks greatly in regards to game-play. It's a very strange release that serves little purpose considering the original release is a bit cheaper than this mobile title ported to the Nintendo Switch. It gets the job done if you want to experience XV without access to any other console but the price-point is just too high to justify the purchase.