#I kept going ‘Mom they cut off his legs 😆😆😆!!!’

[capitalisticveins]

You think Gabe was able to handle 2 years old David at David’s mom funeral? Because that’s literally all I keep thinking about for some reason 🥲

Taking this from experience I feel like he had to worry more abt the other members since David probably didnt even know what was going on, but imagine him raising him after that day alone😭 Gabe’s whole story is so sad to me😖

[blue2black]

COD incorrect quotes, but their from TikToks I saw and are now buried somewhere deep in my likes:

PART 2

—————————

*in an Uber pt 3*

Soap: Is it that big of a deal?

Gaz: YES!

Soap: It’s just two people who love each other.

Soap: “Love Is Love”, that’s what the gay people say.

Gaz: Well, fuck them homosexuals because love and love is not the same thing in this situation.

—————————

Makarov, holding out a gun: Put your hands up!

Price: No.

Makarov: …what?

Price: I said no.

Makarov: Why not?

Price: I don’t want to. 😒

Makarov: But I’ve got a gun.

Price: I don’t care. 🤷🏻‍♂️

Makarov: But…doesn’t make any sense! (Ō👄Ō)

Price: Too bad!

—————————

Ghost, holding in his laughter: Johnny, I have something really important to tell you…

Soap, looking up from his sketch book: What’s up, love?

Ghost, smiling: I wanna get a job cleaning mirrors…

Soap: … *realizes this is a dad joke*

Ghost, still holding a laugh: It’s something I can really-

Soap, getting up and walking away: NO.

Ghost: -can really SEE myself doing… *breaks off into wheezing laughter*

—————————

*Soap as soon as Price takes his eyes off of him*

Soap: Eureka! That’s it! 😃

Soap: I’ll run away! 🏃🏻‍♂️💨

—————————

Gaz: We're an interracial couple; I let him drive just in case we get pulled over.

Alex: We're an interracial couple; everybody thinks his credit score is good 'cause of me.

Gaz: We're an interracial couple; I can wear bonnets and he can't, 'cause he'll get cancelled.

Alex: We're an interracial couple; every time we go out to eat the old people stare at us.

Gaz: We're an interracial couple; every time you see me take a family picture, people scream "get out".

Alex: We're an interracial couple; every night he leaves the stove light on, and I think it's raising our electricity bill.

Gaz: We're an interracial couple; I can say certain words that he can't, like: NI-

—————————

Price: Are you stuck?

Gaz, hanging from a bloody rope once again: ...I AM. 😭

—————————

Ghost: What the hell were you thinking?!

Soap: You told me not to think!

Ghost: … (Ô_Ô)

Soap: … (Û~Û)💅🏻

Ghost: … (Ō_Ō) *this bitch…*

—————————

(Alejandro and Rudy making fun of Graves)

Rudy, laughing: PARECE ZORRILLO— 🤣

*Alejandro and Rudy fall on the ground laughing their asses off*

—————————

Laswell: Wow, a surprisingly peaceful, domestic moment.

Laswell: When will it be ruined?

Soap, Gaz, Price, Ghost: LASWELL!! 😫😫😫😫

Laswell: There it is! -_-💢

—————————

Laswell, who’s been hearing them flirt over coms for 50 minutes: Why don’t you two cut the horse shit, and get to the part where you admit you have sexual feelings for one another.

Ghost and Soap: WOAH-!

—————————

(Laswell asking why they all joined the army)

Ghost: NO- *buries face into a pillow*

Laswell: Ghost, why’d you join the army? 😆

Ghost, whining into the pillow: I don’t know… 😭

—

Laswell: Soap, why’d you join the army?

Soap: So I can fire guns! 😃

—

Laswell: Why’d you join the army?

Gaz: … 😐

Gaz: I’ll answer that question with another question…

Gaz: Why the fuck did think this was a good idea? 🥲

—

Laswell: Why’d you join the army, John?

Price: Because I had nothing better to do.

—

Laswell: Why’d you join the army?

Rudy: …’cause I’m a fucking idiot. 😐 *spanish rage*

—

Laswell: Why’d you join the army?

Alejandro: Why’d I join the army?

Alejandro: For money.

Laswell: What money? 🤨

—

Laswell: Why’d you join the army?

Alex: To find a battle boo. 😂

Laswell: 😂

—

Laswell: Farah, why’d you-

Farah: Wait- *takes off headphones*

Farah: Okay, what?

Laswell, chuckling: Why’d you join the army?

Farah: Shit…

Farah: I don’t know my guy.

Laswell: Cream? 🙂

Farah: Cream. 😌

—————————

Ghost, smiling: Knock knock.

Soap, already so over it: Who’s there? 😒

Ghost: I eat mop.

Soap: I eat mop who?-

Soap: Ugh, Simon! *walking away*

*Ghost wheezes in pure bliss*

—————————

*in an Uber pt 4*

Gaz: I’m not open to this. At all.

Soap: Why you not open—GET open to it.

Gaz: The only thing that was open here was..your mom’s damn legs.

Gaz: And she should’ve kept them closed for her brother.

Soap: 😧

—————————

Shepherd: Here we go…

Shepherd: 15 years and 14 hours later…

Shepherd: Best brisket in Texas.

Graves, who purposely gave Shepherd the wrong recipe: 😏 (GRAVES, YOU EVIL BI-)

—————————

Farah: How did you know that you always wanted to be a professional Drug Cartel Leader?

Valeria: I just wanted to be a star in any way I got it.

Valeria: I said if I didn't become a star by thirty-five I was just gonna become a serial killer.

Farah: ...well, girl, how old are you? I'm getting nervous... 😨

—————————

Gaz: Hi! I'm the witch that won't turn you into a frog because amphibians are people too!

Gaz: Kyle Garrick! *pulls out a frog and lets it hop away*

Ghost: ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ɢᴏɴɴᴀ ᴅɪᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ.

Gaz: ...

Ghost: I'm Simon.