#I keep forgetting how glorious and amazing watermelon is

[some-pers0n]

Hypothetically speaking, I could very well get this chapter of the Albatross fic done tonight if I manage to focus for a bit, get around to editing, and then post it along with chapter 3 tonight.

[yeehawfolk]

Hi! I think yr totally right about Felix's teeth probably not being great and how he and the rest of the crew should have more scars! Do u have any other lil appearance HCs for him/the whole gang? (:

OK! SO! I have a Lot of HCs about the crew, appearance-wise, anyway. Don't get me wrong, I love their canon designs, but I feel like they didn't utilize "Halcyon is fucked" enough with your companions? If that makes sense. I'm going to break this up character by character, so it'll be an easier read!

Also, I'm gonna put a TW on this for slight self harm on this?? It's not emotionally motivated at all, it's like when you'd compete to see who can get the gnarliest eraser burn in middle school, but nevertheless, I want to warn y'all ahead of time, it's on Ellie's part.

Parvati:

-Honestly, her eyes are gorgeous. They're brown, but an amber kind of brown, and very bright.

-I personally HC that Parvati chews her nails when she's nervous, so they're always nubs and usually pretty dirty, bc Mechanic and all.

-Her hands have faint scars from nicks and burns from working on machinery. The skin on her hands doesn't scar easily, but she still has a few gnarly scars from particularly bad burns or cuts that she wasn't able to take proper care of.

-Constantly has bruises of unknown origin on her arms and legs. She bruises very easy, and always has, which is kind of precarious when you're a mechanic.

-This might already be canon and I just haven't noticed bc I'm using the Switch version, but I HC Parv has some freckles sprinkled around her face. Not a lot by any means, but I HC she gets frequent sun when she's working on certain parts of the town, and freckles are a bi-product of that.

-She has a couple small scars on her face; one just below her eye on her cheek, and another on her chin. I like to think she fell on her chin, and the other was from her first project that blew up in her face, literally.

-Her skin is just a bit ashy because she hasn't had access to a lot of good lotions over the years.

-Despite taking a shower every morning, she accumulates grease smudges and dirt from her plants on herself very easily. She cleans up for her and Junlei's dates, but for casual visits both don't really bother. Sometimes they make a game of smudging each other with grease while they work and by the time they're finished their faces look like they were going for war paint.

-I like to think Parvati and Junlei eventually wear rings with each other (like, years down the line) and when Parvati gets deep in thought, she rests it against her lips. Junlei does something similar by turning her ring on her finger.

-Parv has ok teeth, not like great, but she takes pretty good care of them, even if sometimes she has to forgo it for a day or few while out with the Captain.

-When she's in Edgewater, she's always skinny, and if you squinted you probably could pick out a rib or so. But after she moves in with The Captain, she gains weight, and finally has the little pooch of fat that you're supposed to have around the middle. Ellie helps her keep up with nutritional needs (what you can get in Halcyon, anyway) and gets very proud when she makes her goals.

Felix:

-This boy has horrible teeth. His sweet tooth + being an orphan in the Back Bays didn't leave much time for proper teeth cleaning. He probably never really had enough bits to get toothpaste with, either.

-Oh, boy. He has scars galore. Some are from scuffles (he has some on his back from when he was a kid and used to get in trouble for stealing) but a lot are also from getting burned by pipes, or jagged metal. A fair few are from him doing dumbass things in his teenage years ("I wonder what would happen if I heat up these rounds of light ammo with a flamethrower??") because you can't tell me this boy didn't do dumb things like every teenage boy did but with more disasterous results bc SciFi.

-His nose has been broken quite a few times, so it's crooked in a couple spots.

-Can frequently be found with bloody knuckles just because he forgets that punching someone with a mask over their face really isn't the best idea. This eventually culminates into him making the "Millstone Drop-Kick!" his go-to move.

-This isn't exactly appearance related, but I HC Felix has a fucked back from his life of hauling heavy boxes. It doesn't help that he drop kicks literally everything that moves tho.

-Probably has chronic pain in his hands from his hands getting crushed by boxes at some point or another. Several of his fingers are crooked from being broken and improperly set. His bones probably aren't the best bc of poor nutrition growing up, either, so they're a little easier to break.

-Just. Me thinking about Felix in his 40s, or even early 30s: Honey, you have a big storm coming.

-This is also a little random, but I like to think that it takes a long time for Felix to grow any kind of facial hair (he has chronic babyface) so he's super proud of his scruff.

-Max: That's peach fuzz. If that.

-Felix: Leave me alone you big hairy bastard, just bc you have to shave like every other day to keep a clean face doesn't mean all men do!!

-(He's just a bit sensitive about his facial hair)

-(He one day dreams of growing a glorious beard like Sanjar's, but it would take him like 50 years)

-(Shut up Max one day he'll have an amazing handlebar mustache and you won't be laughing then)

-I have no idea if piercings or tattoos are a Thing in Halcyon (probs not, honestly, but I can dream) but if they are, he tried to pierce his ears by himself once, they got infected, and he got really sad when he had to let them close. The marks are still there but the holes have closed by now.

-ELLIE PIERCES HIS EAR AND HELPS HIM KEEP IT CLEAN

-Felix is strong, but he's skinny and gangly as all hell and it's hard as fuck to get him to gain any weight, mostly because he still has his habit of eating only what he needs and stashing the rest. It takes him a while with the crew to get over that, and when he does, he gains a healthy amount of weight around his middle. Ellie teases him a bit, but is 1,000x happier that he's no longer damn near a walking skeleton.

-Listen. Ellie and Felix are bros I don't make the rules. She denies it but she would kill for Felix.

-Usually has slight dark circles under his eyes, because he has nightmares sometimes and can't sleep.

-His eyes are really, really pretty. Like. Super fucking pretty. He has long lashes and they sparkle when he smiles. His eyes are hazel like Max's, but more on the brown side, with streaks of green radiating out from the pupil.

-Speaking of smiles. He has the goofiest and sweetest grins around. A little self-conscious about his teeth, but honestly that doesn't stop him from laughing and smiling with everyone. He has a couple broken teeth, but honestly it just makes his grin a lil lopsided and cute.

-He gets the Worst bed-head. It stands almost straight up in every direction, but it's really easy to tame. Mostly because he just runs his hands through it and calls it a day.

-He found Max's hair gel once and went Ham. He used the whole can sticking his hair up into a mohawk, and proceeded to parade around for Ellie and Parvati. Then bolt to his room and lock the door when Max shouted his name from the bathroom. Max's hair was out of whack for like. A week. He kept blowing it out of his face and Felix and Ellie would giggle like madmen when he did.

-*BANGS FISTS ON TABLE* FELIX IS BABY! FELIX IS BABY!!

Max:

-My MANS

-Listen, I am extremely gay for Max. This needs to be known before I continue, because I have a metric fuckton of Max HCs.

-So, first off, Max takes VERY good care of his appearance. Like. Insanely good. His hair is always perfectly held back by a moderate amount of gel, his nails perfectly trimmed and cleaned. He keeps a clean-shaven face.

-But don't let that fool you, Max can and will get down and dirty when need be, he just doesn't care to stay like that.

-Quite a few scars from his prison and Tossball years. But because of the clothes he wears you wouldn't be able to see them easily. Mostly on his back/sides, though he has a couple on his torso and legs.

-The Captain calls him Bigfoot because his grows hair really fast and his arms and chest have some pretty thick hair. Max is very confused, because he personally doesn't think his feet are that big.

-Not an appearance HC per se, but he smells like soap, aftershave, and books.

-When he doesn't gel his hair, it falls in his face constantly, and it annoys the fuck out of him.

-Fuckin ripped bro. Just. What the fuck. Why is a priest this fuckin shredded. Why make my gay little heart ache more than it already does, Obsidian??

-Despite his arm muscles being like. Huge, he still has a healthy layer of fat over his middle, mostly because being an OSI Priest, he got a little bit better nutrition VS. literally all of Halcyon.

-When his knee gets Bad (like hiking through Monarch with the Captain) he has a slight limp? Barely noticeable, but you can tell he's not putting weight on it. I HC its an old Tossball injury (that might be canon, I haven't played in forever).

-Its hard to tell in the different lights of the game whether his hair is Black or Silver, and I like to think he's greying, but not fully grey yet. He can have a little hair color, still. As a treat.

-Fuckin no lashes to speak of. None at all. Baldy eyes. Its the only part of him that doesn't have really thick hair and ngl he is very salty about it. Tho his actual eyes are very pretty; they're hazel with a lot of green. He has a darker ring on the outside and flecks of brown in them.

-Has very good teeth, whiter than most of Halcyon's because of the OSI providing for him.

-Broke his nose once during Tossball, though he was able to get it set alright. Slight crook in the bridge of his nose.

-He has a lot of those moles from his face scattered around. Particularly his shoulders and back.

-Also have you seen his fuckin canon thighs??? Bro. They could crush a watermelon. Once again, I must say, what the fuck, why is this priest so fuckin shredded.

-Actually takes his physical health very seriously, so I like to think he's in great shape for his age. Seeing him in some of the canon outfits though makes me more inclined to think that's canon.

-Sorry, I have thought about this A Lot, and the gay jumps out of me sometimes.

-A fair amount of scars on his arms. Not as many as Nyoka, but a little bit more than Parvati.

-Has calloused hands, but they've softened over his years as a priest.

Ellie:

-Now I feel like Ellie wouldn't have many scars that she didn't let scar up on purpose to give her an edge. They're essentially superficial; they look cool but didn't do any real damage.

-Also, her skin is very pale, so she doesn't scar easily anyway.

-Though she does have some, and they're more recent. A couple of gashes on her arms, and a bullet wound in her side. She's proud of them.

-The dark circles under her eyes are because she likes to stay up late at night. Sometimes she contemplates her life, but she doesn't like it, and usually doesn't bother too much.

-Her lashes are very thick and full, and they compliment her eyes very well. Her eyes aren't exactly ice blue, they're a bit darker, and have real pretty lighter streaks in them.

-Yes, her lips are naturally that color. Good for picking up women, bad for looking intimidating to marauders.

-Really soft skin, she's always had access to good lotion. After she leaves Byzantium, she purposely looks a bit more grimy than she did then, which is easy to do because of her skin tone.

-Has a few moles and freckles, but not many, mostly on her shoulders and back. She was inside a lot prior to her leaving Byzantium.

-Her hair doesn't really sit down when she sleeps, but it does lose some poofiness, so she has to meticulously push it up in the mornings.

-Not quite an appearance HC, but I feel like when she gets comfortable with ADA, she gives her compliments. Stuff like "Your screen is very bright today, ADA!" ADA does the same thing. "And your hair is looking very bright as always, Dr. Fenhill."

-Muscular, but lean, and puts on weight a little easier than others, so she wouldn't look like she could kick your ass without her pirate get-up, but she could 100%, no holds barred kick your ass.

-Very good teeth. Despite wanting to look like a gnarly pirate she takes dental care very seriously. Tho she thinks about getting punched in the mouth occasionally so she could like break off a piece of her tooth. Not the whole thing, just enough to make her look tough.

-Idc if piercings and tattoos aren't a Thing in Halcyon, Ellie has pierced ears. Three in each ear, and I like to think an eyebrow and maybe nose ring. She doesn't wear them when she's in Dangerous Situations because she firsthand had to fix ears that had their earrings ripped out during rich catfights that she does NOT want that to happen to her.

-She also has tattoos covering most of her back, and some of her upper arms. She got them "illegally" (meaning it's illegal to The Board, but the Groundbreaker doesn't really give a shit) on The Groundbreaker and she's proud as fuck of them.

-I have Feelings about the missed opportunities for illegal tattoo/piercing parlors. Like I know there's not a lot of self-expression to be had and no Art aside from fonts, but c'mon. Humans have drawn on their skin since the beginning all around the world and we WOULD find ways to do it again, even if it's needle-poke tattoos.

-Anyway, back to Ellie.

-You ever hear of a "lighter tattoo"? Basically, you heat up a lighter and then stamp the hot metal into your skin and it makes a mark in the shape of the lighter head. If you get it hot enough and hold it long enough it can scar. They have a similar thing in Halcyon with Plasma Cutters. Instead of Stab, you heat it up, turn it off, and press the blade to your skin and it pretty much scars within a couple seconds.

-Ellie 100% did a few of those when she was in Byzantium as like the "hahaha edgy" thing that teenagers do.

-Like I know technically kids aren't around but... bruh... you can't tell me that teenagers in a SciFi setting wouldn't do dumb ass shit like that.

-Ellie is honestly the baddest bitch and I love her, ok, she just reminds me so much of of those high school delinquent tropes in 90s movies

Nyoka:

-SO I HAVE SOME FEELINGS ABOUT NYOKA'S CANON DESIGN... IN THAT SHE'S ESSENTIALLY A MONSTER HUNTER BUT SHE HAS NO SCARS!

-Listen, ok, she would 100% have a lot of scars from her life on Monarch. I share some HCs with @nyokaacore in that she has three scars over one of her eyes, and a few others around her face, like on her lips.

-The bulk of her scars are on her arms and body, though, as she usually is able to get the Canid or Rapt off before they get to her face.

-I like to think the scars on her eye are from Freida, the first Rapt she ever killed that's taxidermied on her wall.

-But she has a lot of scars from Raptidon claws and Canid mouthplates, sprinkled with some Manti burns and burns from Rapt spit.

-She also has her fair share of bullet scars on her, and definitely has some patches of skin discoloration from incidents regarding the sulphur pools. Chemical burns are a bitch.

-She's tall, and not exactly curvy? But broad. Big shoulders, wide hips, sturdy legs. Looks like she could kill you, could actually kill you alignment.

-The sand and sulphur in the air plays Hell on her skin, so she's got some old acne scars and places that scarred up into moles on her face. Has an issue with dry skin.

-Her skin is also pretty oily, and she washes it when she can, but water is usually better spent being drunk than washed with. However, she does carry a spare bottle of non-drinkable water to wash Rapt acid off in emergencies, so sometimes she'll pull from that to wash her face with.

-Big hands, calloused, pretty scarred up from her time on Monarch.

-I also like to think that she can tell you stories about most of the scars she has, lmao.

-Her nose, like Felix's, has been broken quite a few times and is pretty crooked.

-Most often, you see Nyoka with a slight sunburn on her face. It's hard to see, but her cheeks are usually warm to the touch.

-Her teeth aren't the best, but she does take as much care of them as she can out on Monarch. Still pretty yellow with some cavities, but not as bad at Felix's.

-Honestly the dark circles around her eyes are usually because she doesn't sleep a lot. She has dreams about CHARON, and that's not her favorite thing to do.

-At a pretty healthy weight for Halcyon, and ofc, has muscles as big as your head.

-Surprisingly soft hands, though.

[peridotfanfic]

Peridot’s Flawless Fanfic: Episode 1

Greetings minions! This is the powerful, terrifying, lovable Peridot, here to spew forth my glorious textual meep morps for you to consume! Using advanced gem science, and my exhaustive research into Camp Pining Hearts “fan” “created” “content”, I, Peridot, have devised a system that will generate “new” stories starring my loyal Crystal Gems! This is the first of many. It has a song, so you will enjoy it.

Episode 1 - Serious Buddies Club

We. . . and the people of,

This world that's a way,

And everything you can't,

We'll think of us this way!

That's why a crystal always can’t,

Believe you, and the crystal gems, and Greg,

And evil!

The episode opens right before the gems warp to destroy a robot of donuts. Garnet quickly shoves the van, leaving a giant penny to see.

GARNET: It's 'cause you're believe. It's 'cause you're losing your own future that you must now be strong.    

Pearl insists they don't understand birthdays.  

PEARL: We could've done a powerful weapon for her, that wasn't the war we fought. Her favorite kind of garment was everything I ever was. For 6000 years I never thought of eating you.

AMETHYST: Just gotta go with the cool kids, you know? Like garbage, and everyone's always acting.    

As the crystal gems return with all living matter, Steven takes responsibility from Lion's mane. They have to punish Steven for being trapped in time.    

GARNET: Steven, there's no sides for those cows you hurt. We promised your mother that we kept you to save these little things that aren't there.    

PEARL: This chair was precious to me, and she loved it.

Pearl begins singing of her frustration with Greg and his fierce glare, of Rose's body and of Rose's secrets that she thought violence would damage.     

Pearl sings “A Sword for Fighting”:

You know I never thought a sword for fighting,

You live with someone that I never do.

The war we fought was like a song for someone.

We really do it wrong, when isn't it a wrong for you?

And when I found a sword, I knew it over war,

That termite ridden barn, that everything is for. . .

Fight-ing. . .

The nerve for fighting,

Your sword for fighting.

You have nothing to inspire, when we could have done this for,

We really are the way, a power that we were.

To doubt you and those years, it’s catchy and not her!

We really are the way, a power that we were. . .

For fighting,

That is for fighting,

Someone for fighting!

A sword for fighting. . .

Her face is not working good. The other gem that is important to Steven asks for more.

AMETHYST: Pearl be comin' just so awesome Steven! Can't outrun the crocodile I'm being! What I'm thinking can't even be more like just what you gotta do, you know?

Bad news about Mr. Steven then appears.  He can't concentrate everything around town, but he refuses to split apart into many fragments of ice. They all stop fighting when suddenly Greg shows up 20 minutes late to the strawberry game. Steven realizes Greg is the handsome one and is still wrong, but he is okay with Rose.

AMETHYST: The heck you want? A nerd just got to me like this guy. Just what makes you so childish, like walkin' to kill the baby!

He wants to stay with them, resulting in a massive sandstorm. His pants are doing anything to help.

GREG: I officially like Garnet. Just wanted to check out the universe of ponies. You understand the Four of Nowhere. My hair just can't stay.    

STEVEN: You gotta take the whole day whackering to have sushi, my dad. You're nothing like Jasper thinks you should be. A curse i'm gonna make is really weird.

As Steven struggles to defuse the situation, a gem named The Other Gem is able to run over to Steven.     

PERIDOT: You called me cute and it's actually pretty great! I'm using this lousy, gemforsaken planet to betray the whole point of that other time. My things that i've grown have memories of coming here to earth, but now we're all insane. Have anything better to get than this sad rock you clods keep destroying?

AMETHYST: You know what's wrong with this guy? No matter how smart the g-squad be, I'm alive and I'll be small like the ocean! Anything reformed like earth just happens to me. Steven and everyone's always the sun, you are.

Pearl and Amethyst try various projectiles with their bodies so Greg admits his van only wants to buy secret watermelon Stevens.

GREG: On earth was a man that was thousands of years, like Garnet. But the police still just showed the best of the stuff to me. That happened just like i wanted it to. They started to turn my clothes to the first and other escorts of Earth, they didn't mean to avoid it anymore. You understand anything anymore that i mean?  

STEVEN: Just can't believe you can fly with a regular-sized giant woman. You hurt your relationships, but everyone's been awful too. I'm my mom, not you, so please don't drown me like you wanted to. This crazy state, my dad, is not common, but amazing! Be extremely dangerous to Ronaldo, so please just don't forget me.    

That night, they find themselves in the room and overload the house. They all stop fighting when asked.

STEVEN: This means Peridot is a great machine and I'm gonna just leave the pants in Jersey.

PERIDOT: This is even more than you can't do. I guess I'm already a crystal system colony that matters to Homeworld.

AMETHYST: Steven aaah! You gotta just tell me what happened! Me and everyone's like this, and now we're gonna beat the heck out of Beach City, no problem!

PEARL: Was everything I know a joke? I'm not overreacting, I'm taking this place to you. We shouldn't have stayed home!

GARNET: That might need a river of destruction. We can cause that thing and we are gonna. You did what good you must, and it's because your mother would be so proud that you did. Love is like a burrito child that splits to protect anything you deceived. Steven, I embody your butt.    

The episode ends with Rose remarking that Pearl is okay.

[andsotheadventurebeginsblog]

Slaying Demons on the Autumn 100.

I sit here 5 days after completing the biggest physical challenge of my life to date with sore shins, suspected stress fractures, and a totally renewed sense of calm. I did it. I ran 100 miles in under 24 hours.

The night before the race I meet up with Dave, who is glorious, and we go and get some dinner and drink way more wine than any real athlete would even consider healthy. I feel calm. Nervous but calm. Tomorrow I do the thing I love doing the best. After fractured sleep we get up, eat and get to the village hall where the race goes out from. There are a LOT of men here. A lot. There are many people I admire, there are women that have run literally hundreds of 100 mile races, there are men who have done it in under 14 hours there are ultra legends and there is me.

Me standing here in a semi trance, feeling sick and feeling excited and unable to worry about my broken mental state because I have to achieve this. I get my number from Lou - a friend of mine from the online running group I am a part of. She is wonderful and gives me a hug and tells me how excited she is for me. I tell her I’m scared. Because I am. Then at 10.10am on Saturday the 21st October I take the first steps on a 200,000 step journey to running 100 miles. I chat to people, I try and hold my nerve and keep it slow. The pack thins out and it’s very slippery underfoot. My legs feel heavy and I realise I am not enjoying this at all. It’s fairly lonely on these runs. You get people that want to chat and people that definitely don’t. At the first aid station I meet Dan Barrett - he’s so lovely and kind to me. I wonder why. We’ve only met a few times. After 12 miles I bump into someone I met running Bournemouth Marathon - he remembers me - we exchange pleasantries and on I go. I’m really not feeling this today. I am 13 miles in and bored and already tired. This doesn’t bode well.

I get to the 25 mile mark in 5 hours. All on time. All as planned. I didn’t like that leg. I get my drop bag and get changed into a new long sleeve top and have a couple of sandwiches. I feel tired and slightly out of it. I feel a bit hopeless and lost. I get confused as to what I need and what I don’t. I try and do the change over as fast as possible and get out for the second leg. I leave my mobile charger and battery pack in my drop bag. I am an idiot. I am not strategising. It seems like SUCH a long way. I have 75 miles to go and I feel rubbish.

I get my headphones out and put on a podcast. The second leg is better - more forest and the ridgeway is beautiful. Theres technical paths weaving through forests and Kites soar over the fields. These are the trails I love - I feel like I am finally starting to get into my stride, but Storm Brian is on his way and he brings rain and 50mph wind that squalls across the open fields and makes the trails into wet wind tunnels. I nearly get blown over a couple of times but I feel stronger. I have fuelled properly. I love sandwiches. At the 37 mile turnaround point are kids in halloween costumes helping with water. They remind me of my nieces and nephews and make me smile. For the first time I know I will finish this. I’m on the way back. The way back to Goring village hall, to my beloved sister who is pacing me for the next 25 miles. It’s getting dark, I get my head torch out but the route is fraught with obstacles in the shape or tree roots and holes and I fall over twice - once into a patch of stinging nettles - once in a puddle. Classy. My phone runs out of battery. No music. My watch is dying - no mileage or time. I manage to catch up with the guy in front about 3 miles from the halfway point and we chat - he’s lovely and time flies by.

The village hall comes into view - another 5 hour leg. Right on time. And I see my mum and her husband and my sister and three of my best friends who have come to surprise me from London. I double take. WTF. What the hell are they doing here?! I am overwhelmed with love and joy but I don't think it shows. I am in a trance like state. They have come all the way from London to see me for nothing more than a few minutes as I hastily try and get changed and get nutrition sorted. That’s amazing. I can’t tell them how much it means to me. It’s so above and beyond I can’t fathom it. My mum looks a bit worried - my sister is very excited. My friends are warm and cuddly and drunk and I love them. I get changed, I get a hot meal I say thank you and then me and my sister are out, back out into the night. It is 8.20pm. I have been running for 10 hours and I have run 50 miles.

I’m walking as fast as I can trying to guzzle down my dehydrated pasta meal, trying to ignore the tell tale warnings my legs are giving me that I’ve run a long way. I have done this part of the route before. But in the daytime. Night is a totally different game. The ridgeway is exposed and it’s so windy and pitch black. The light from my head torch confuses me.  We are running head on into the wind and it’s soul destroying. My sister is brilliant - she has fresh legs and bags of enthusiasm and I feel bad I can’t keep up with her. I am stuffing my face with as much food as I can but I’ve started to feel sick and tired. And then come the hallucinations. I can see people laying by the side of the road in the foetal position. My sister comments on the beautiful horizon. The beautiful horizon is actually a fence. I dodge things crossing the path in front of me - but there is nothing crossing the path in front of me. We get to an aid station at the top of a hill. It’s in a Luton Van because otherwise it would just blow away. I get coffee and snacks and a cuddle from Lou - plus the personal goodie bag she’s prepped for me that includes the all important mini bottle of jagermeister (I am a pro athlete). 4 Miles til turn around point so we press on - my sister is talking to me about everything and anything. We listen to music and start talking utter nonsense. Then we see the turnaround point adorned in lights but we can’t work out if we’re hallucinating or it’s real. Its 11pm. We are knackered.

A quick coffee then back down the ridgeway with the wind at our backs - it’s like a totally different night. The wind makes all the difference and now the stars are out and its very beautiful. We listen to Foo Fighters. We sing along. We’re trying to stay awake and running. We come across a huge puddle. This wasn’t here on the way out. Shit. We’ve gone the wrong way. It’s so dark and so hard to work out where we are. We retrace our steps and get back on track - we lose about 15 mins but I am determined to get back to the village hall. If I can get back there I can do the final leg. We come in at 2.45am. The last leg has taken 6 and a half hours. I have now run 75 miles.

I hug my sister and send her on her way back to my hotel to sleep. It’s now that I pick up my final pacer Lee. Lee’s pretty experienced when it comes to these huge distances and I trust him implicitly. He knows I am knackered. He knows I am confused and does his best to help as I grab my newly charged watch and some food and spare batteries and get changed for the 4th time. We set out along the Thames Path to Reading at an OK pace but now my legs have started to hurt. My shins are burning. I take some codeine and try and get through it. Lee is a dream and a nightmare. In doing his job as pacer, he becomes the single most important and annoying person in my life. He is making me eat. He is making me drink. I don't want to eat. I get pretty angry with him but he’s having none of it. I eat sandwiches, I drink water and coffee. We keep pushing forward. We’re breaking it up by running and walking but the walking breaks are getting longer and longer and I know I have to keep a 14 min mile pace to break 24 hours. We get to the aid station, quick turnaround and then back out into the dark only to find another aid station a mile down the course. Hang on. It’s the same aid station. We’ve come round in a fucking circle. How the fuck have we done that? Nevermind, on we go. Lee is so chirpy, shouting encouragement at the other runners who say nothing back or just grunt. I imagine they would punch him if they had the energy. It’s 4am and I am running through Reading. I am talking to the swans and ducks, I’m telling Lee his music choices are shit. And then we get to the turnaround point. It’s up some stairs. SOME STAIRS.

I grab a load of fruit and eat about 7 pieces of watermelon - the sugar and gels are making me feel terrible and I am just craving fruit. We head back out. We head back to the village hall for the last time. Its is not about 6am. Birds have started to sing and the end is in sight. Lee is doing a great job of working out times and how fast we need to go to make it sub 24. He keeps telling me I am 10th woman but I don’t care. I just want to finish. Then at about 7am it happens - the sky breaks and the sun begins to come up. It’s another day. I have to finish. I am in a lot of pain and Lee is still making me eat. We are walking and running and walking and running and I am using Lee’s poles because my legs hurt so much. We get the the aid station 4 miles from home. We zip in and out. I am on the way home.

The last 4 miles were such a mix of emotion. I knew I was going to do it,  and everything hurt. My skin hurt. My eyes hurt. My legs hurt. I was very quiet but inside my head was raging. I had a little cry. I walked on ahead of Lee and had a little cry, I think with tiredness more than anything else. Those miles dragged and dragged and everyone we met along the way - the early morning fishermen and the people walking their dogs had a different distance to tell us… “Just 3 miles left” “it’s only a mile!” ARGH!

The one thing I won’t ever forget though, is the feeling that I had beaten the Demon. The Demon that tells me I am not good enough and riots through my head an stomach. That fucking Demon was beaten. Of course there are others in there but the big one was gone and I know I can beat them. I realised the extent of what I had done 3 miles from the end. I am strong. I can keep going physically and mentally.

When I came into the hall and saw my mum, when my sister ran down the last part of the path to meet me, when I saw how proud they all were of me, the Demon was beaten. 100 miles. 23hours 35 minutes. The Demon was beaten.

I am so happy to finish. I am so happy. My adrenaline is high and I pose for the pictures and get undressed and everyone helps me and I am so glad, and I put on my one piece and I step outside. I am shaking and I have to sit down because I think I might be sick. My mum comes with my things and puts me in the car like a baby. She helps me upstairs at the hotel and I just get in bed and curl up, all grubby and sweaty. I find a note form my sister which tells me how proud she is. It makes me cry so much because I love her so much and I am so proud of her.

I just want to sign this off with a thank you to everyone that helped me on this particular journey - my Mum and her husband Jim for their unwavering support. My sister, Janey Wise for her support and pacing and being the best friend and biggest inspiration I could ever ask for. The wonderful David Harvey for his time and patience and training and being brilliant (#withyoueverystep). Lee Stuart-Evans for his advice and pacing and force feeding of an angry toad (me). Tom, Abi, Amy and Lauren for trekking out to see me for 2 mins on a cold October night - thank you, I love you. Lou and Dan from the BBR group - thanks for all your support and encouragement at the aid stations.

This story does not end here.

TBC