#I keep following ppl I don’t even like btw I don’t understand why me remaining to follow her is such a note for concern ? like

[bunveh]

“Atp I feel like you’re just keeping tabs on me here lmao” ummm . . . What an incredibly self centred, egotistical thing to say . . .

[hematomes]

I saw your post about ppl losing their shiz about Kaeya fanart being “whitewashed” when it’s literally darker than he is in canon. I agree btw I love like basically all Kaeya art out there I love one eyepatch man.

anyhoo, I have a story. I once saw a tiktok about a kaeya art. it was specifically labeled “IN PROGRESS” or whatever so you knew the artist wasn’t done. it was a gorgeous piece of art btw. So far, the only thing that had been colored was his hair and some of his clothes.

pretty much everyone in the comments started harrasing her about how he was whitewashed and the artist had to be a white supremacist and i think someone said “see I knew everyone who played genshin was racist just delete the game at this point.”

i was just like 😳 wow jeez it’s literally IN PROGRESS the artist legit said so.

the artist eventually posted the final version (after having to delete the first video and deal with several threats) it did turn out beautiful, but on the comments there and on every post of theirs after people are lurkign in the comments bad-mouthing them.

as much as I definitely am for characters not being whitewashed (especially Kaeya bc I love him your honor) I think some people take it way too far when the person they’re yelling at literally just wanted to get people excited about their WIP.

hi! sorry im so late this issue became quite sensitive lol i had to work up the courage to come back to it. it's gonna be a bit long, but i really need to say all this

if there's one thing i noticed about the genshin community on tiktok and twitter, it's that there is a whole, whole lot of social justice warriors and overall it's extremely toxic. it's something that surprised me because the people i interact with on tumblr are all super sweet and not one bit toxic so? idk, tumblr is just a different breed i guess

your story is extremely saddening. everytime there's a kaeya fanart, people forget about the color theory and the artists' style and claim it's whitewashed and i genuinely don't understand why. if someone could explain it to me, am i missing something? im not an artist so perhaps im mistaken, idk, but i've never seen a fanart where kaeya was whitewashed.

the thing that pisses me off the most is that most of the time it's white ppl calling something whitewashed. i'm not saying you shouldn't call out racism if you see it just bc you're white, just that these people aren't even right - and often you see poc coming into the debate and explaining it's not whitewashed/saying it doesn't bother them. moreover, i've literally seen fanart of beidou as a black girl, which isn't representation in my opinion - beidou is already a poc, and asian people need at least as much representation as black people, so it's plain racism. same thing with kaeya, i've seen edits of him with stereotypical african features, and it's really sad that no one is calling this out but yelling about whitewashing as soon as he isn't the exact same color as the official arts. hell, someone even said "so what if it's darker? it's still whitewashing" and i??? am flabbergasted. whitewashing is absolutely disgusting, but ppl keep misunderstanding what it means and just using it to gratuitously harass artists.

now, don't get me wrong. i believe that you can draw whatever you want. but the thing is - if you get mad when someone draws kaeya white (if they really do, i mean), you can't just applaud someone else's that draws another character black. racism goes both ways, and it's bordering on fetishism. i, as a poc (mixed-race, caucasian + african), am extremely uncomfortable everytime i see this double-standard.

but anyway, the fact remains that sjw have plagued the genshin fandom. and it's not just about kaeya's skin color (we don't even know if he's really a poc - we know he's tan according to paimon, and i believe she called him "exotic"? so idk) but also about the ships. everytime i see a shippy tiktok, there's plenty of ppl out here saying it's wrong, claiming their own ship is the most canon. if i'm not mistaken, kaeluc is the one that gets the most hate, and i genuinely, once again, don't understand why.

i talked about them before and explained how it's not incest bc they really aren't brothers, but i swear every now and then i see people throwing death threats and slurs anytime someone hints at them. idk if you are familiar with the eng va's fandom, but sometimes they play among us together, aether's va does some livestreams where he invites different voice actors. but diluc's va is never there, and i was wondering why - recently i learned that it's because he retweet a fanart of kaeya and diluc fighting alongside each other (not even a shippy fanart, apparently) and people harassed him and excluded him from the fandom. and now the same thing is happening to griffin burns, childe's va, bc he retweeted (or liked, idk) a fanart of lumine and childe fighting or something and people called it pedophilia bc lumine would be a minor. i'm not even gonna dive into this bc the travelers are canonically like 30 times childe's age, but what i mean is - people are so full of hate and i can't fathom living like this?

the point is, i totally respect anyone who doesn't ship something i ship. i myself don't like certain ships - like zhongli/xiao, jean/diluc - but im not gonna harass ppl who do just because i can? that's messed up, i just don't get it. i wish the fandom wasn't that bad bc i really enjoy this game

anyway, im really disappointed but still grateful, bc my followers & people i've interacted with here have been nothing but sweet and respectful. i hope none of y'all come across the toxic side of the genshin fandom. stay safe y'all!

[amwritingmeta]

15x19: A First Ending

This was a good episode! Oh, I know, I know - we didn’t get Cas back. But oh, boy, that should mean that Misha shot for five of eight days for 15x20 and that makes me want to rub my hands together with the hope of what that might mean. All the good things!

Oh, don’t hang your hopes on mine btw. I had very high hopes that we’d get Cas back, or very strongly established as coming back (as per 13x04) with a final scene of him waking up in the Empty or something like it, and that didn’t happen, but omg I’m so glad they didn’t.

When Jack started praying and reaching out to Cas my heart almost stopped. 

If Dean doesn’t instigate Cas’ return, then oh it would take away too much!

But then Jack’s moment didn’t lead to anything, and now, the more I think about it, there more it feels like a plant. A reminder of how he prayed to Cas the last time, and woke him. We shall see, eh?

And then we got Dean telling Chuck to bring Cas back, which was a pivotal plant as well. I’d been worried if they hadn’t mentioned Cas more than once, with Dean telling Jack and Sam that Cas sacrificed himself to save him, yeah? 

If there had been no more Cas for the entire episode then, narratively speaking, I would have started wondering what role Cas might actually play in 15x20.

But Cas was mentioned more than once. We even got to hear his voice and have that fake return to stir our... I almost wrote loins, but that’s not appropriate so let’s change it to stir our... martinis. 

Ah yes. We could all use a drink, I’m sure.

The dog as well! Dean was so happy and he carried the dog and petted the dog and put it in Cas’ spot in the backseat and was all, yes, emotional substitute! And then... poof. Because it’s not going to be that easy to replace Cas. *fingers crossed*

Here’s mostly why I’m hopeful for something quite different as the actual finale of the show, the proper wrapping up of these character journeys:

This first ending is for those who have followed the show explicitly to watch these two brothers. (yes there’s a word for them but let’s not)

It ends exactly how these viewers -- and quite possibly the writers who wrote it -- always saw the show ending. It gives an emotionally satisfying wrapping up of all the thematic threads of the show and gives the brothers their hard-won freedom, and keeps the brothers riding in Baby, together, indefinitely. 

And these viewers and fans will always be able to stop watching the show there and keep that as their perfect ending.

Except it’s not the ending-ending. Is it?

This episode neatly and gorgeously wrapped up the Michael/Lucifer/Chuck storyline. It wiped the slate completely clean. Especially with Michael killing Lucifer and Chuck killing Michael. These characters just completely annihilating  each other because they’ve all served their purpose.

And Chuck being drained of his powers and ending up ignored, never to be worshipped again, or even remembered, is such a fitting ending for him! And with Dean refusing to kill him, leaving him to his fate, I’d call that Dean integrating his Shadow.

No more fearing it. It’s powerless. Thanks to Jack (Dean’s inner child) who now holds all the power in the universe.

I’d say Dean Winchester has reached a point of internal balance.

And for all of these good things: Chuck powerless, Jack the New God, surely helping to fix what Cas broke by restoring Heaven (I’m assuming Heaven will be repopulated or that God’s grace will level it out) and Jack stepping into shoes that Cas once tried to fill and failed to, to the detriment to so many of his kin, is simply stunning.

I cried, properly, at Jack’s speech. It was beautiful.

But for all these good things and wrappings up of stuff, didn’t the ending feel kind of superficial? Like stuff was missing in those final five minutes or so? Like... I don’t know... Sam mentioning Eileen maybe? Because surely she was brought back along with everyone else, and one episode ago he was losing his mind over the loss of her.

And they didn’t even mention Cas. Jack mentioned Castiel as a good influence, but Cas was just bunched in with “everyone we’ve lost along the way”.

Meh.

Hey, it’s fine if all you care about is Dean and Sam and you think that they’re at their happiest when they get to drive along a road in Baby, listening to tunes and play-fighting and reminiscing about all those people that have come and gone, while they know they’ll always remain the same.

I mean, if we hadn’t gotten that montage at the end of this episode (a fucking MONTAGE ppl) I would’ve started thinking that maybe Misha was coming back to shoot flashbacks for 15x20, as we got to see the brothers remembering Cas (like with Mary), taking a walk down memory lane and driving around to well-known locales for a final hurrah.

But we got that fucking montage, ppl.

Leaving me to feel that they probably won’t also spend forty minutes rememberembering those same people. You know?

Also, dull. And Dabb is anything but dull. And Dabb loves pulling on stuff he’s hinted at in the first ep of the season. 

And I remember reacting to Sam being the one to escort the kid and her mother into the, what was it? The high school, right? For safety.

While Dean and Cas had that tense exchange by Baby, where Dean couldn’t not ask if Cas was okay and Cas saying, hopefully, that he was, but Dean remaining stone faced and distant. “Awkward” is what Belphegor called it.

Oh. Please let there be awkwardness in 15x20. I beg on bent knees. Beg, I say!

Anyway.

What is 15x20 going to be about if it isn’t about finally answering the question of what will make the brothers happy?

A balanced universe, of course! But freedom without love... sounds kind of lonely to me. 

So, have they answered the question of What do I want? yet? Is this what they want for themselves? More of the same? This season has hinted that it isn’t. It’s hinted very strongly that it isn’t.

So, I’m holding my breath that Dean’s final confrontation is to do with happiness and daring to want it for himself. Daring to admit to wanting it for himself. Daring to go after it... 

Cas does not belong in the Empty.

And hope that it’s telling how Jack didn’t even think to get Cas out of there and bring him home. God got Lucifer out of the Empty so Jack definitely has the power. 

And Dean didn’t ask him to get Cas out of there, not because he doesn’t still want Cas out, but because it would ruin the first ending for the people who want Cas to stay dead. Yeah? 

It’s kind of beautifully done, to my mind, as a nod and a thank you to the people who have supported one reading of the show. It’ll be difficult for them to go apeshit when Dabb and the writers can simply tell them they don’t have to watch further than 15x19 and be content that they’ve got an ending that lets them cling to the brothers as the begin all, end all.

And yes, I remain believing we will get Dean and Cas together-together before the end of the show. I have no clue how much of a together-together we’ll get, but for the show not to give us a clear understanding of how Dean loves Cas back is unthinkable at this point, and will stay unthinkable until the show tells me otherwise, because nothing but those two together makes even a lick of sense to me.

Dean’s feelings were in the subtext this episode because that’s where they always have been and hopefully fingers crossed because this ending wasn’t for us, it was for other sides of fandom, giving them room for denial, if they simply don’t want to see that what Dean wants is Cas back.

Our ending isn’t happening until next week.

Dean: It’s a helluva time to bail. There’s a lot of people counting on you. People with questions—they’re gonna need answers. Jack: The answers will be in each of them. Maybe not today, but someday.

For me this may be setting up for 15x20.

Dean could be said to be accepting the reality of Cas being gone this episode. He starts off not telling the whole truth about what happened with Cas (of course), he’s drinking himself stupid, he tries to demand of Chuck to bring Cas back, he finds that emotional crutch in the doggo and he moves into acceptance because what else can he do?

Especially if he’s still reeling and is struggling with his fear of happiness, with not feeling deserving, with it being easier to simply let it all go.

But.

Letting go of the need is healthy, allowing it to make way for the real want that is about choosing Cas, not because he feels lost without him, but because Cas completes him...

That would be something. 

(oh shush let’s get with the romance) (Jerry always brings it)

The brothers love each other, but throughout this narrative there’s been hints that they both long for more. So much more. It would be so weird if it didn’t all wrap up with more being wanted and chosen and offered and had.

So if the answers are to be “in each of them -- someday”, then maybe Dean just needs to reach a moment where he’s ready to admit to himself that he can’t stand the fact that Cas died not knowing that Dean loves him back.

I wonder if Sam will push for this admittance... I’d like to witness that conversation, that’s for sure.

And Eileen. I hope she’s back sooner rather than later next episode!!

What’s next episode going to be about if it’s not about the breaking of old patterns to make way for new ones...? Are we going to follow the boys around as they do laundry and cook and make a few tentative plans for their unknown future? They won’t be hunting much in 15x20, at least if Dabb is anything to go by. I guess there might be something brief as a final The Boys With Their Weapons Doing Their Thing, but... it won’t be a case episode. And it would’ve been strange if it was, you know?

So then. Hope. One more week breathing eating sleeping on hopes and wishes and we shall simply have to wait and see what we get.

I have every faith it will blow us away, but I’m also sitting pretty. Reining in those horses lest they run away with me. And whatever comes our way, I’m so grateful for this show!

[gem-quest]

[QUEST o2. - E N T H R O N E D]

(written by @bebemoon)

mentions: @ayzrules @elissastillstands & @armadasneon​

. . . Quest 2 .

A few days passed without word from Inferna, and Neddy was beginning to think she'd been forgotten.

A pair of players were marrying in the gardens the week following the meadow fair. And Neddy made an appearance out of sheer curiosity-

The ceremony was within a tumble of pale pink blossoms beneath a flowering tree, and the fae—and even all who were stuck on the level—were in attendance, surrounding the couple of Moonstone players. Neddy recognised the groom as the gleaming Moonstone jouster from the fair. The bride was a tiny Healer with hair matching the blossoms overhead and a veil of glimmering chain mail set with white crystals. They seemed blissful- so much so that Neddy wondered about them.    

Besides, was this a binding union in the real world? Probably not since Finvarra was the one to marry them, and Neddy rather doubted the Prince was ordained for such an affair. He wasn't even real.

Maybe it didn't matter to them- at any moment, any of them could be skewered with a sword and die at once in two worlds. Might as well live happily and love when possible.  

Neddy shook her head. What an outlandish situation they all found themselves in . . .

-

There was a celebration afterwards, but in Yue City. Understandably, the happy couple wanted to be able to eat together as well as remain free of the fae.

Neddy stayed behind to put her feet up on the feast table alongside some of Finvarra's tittering wives to watch the dancing for a while. The feeling of isolation began to creep up on her once again.

Suddenly, there was a familiar trilling from her rucksack at her feet, barely audible over the fairy music. It was the sound the Plexus' messaging function made when a new message was received.

Excitedly, Neddy dug into the rucksack and drew the Plexus out. She swiped the screen, and the new message appeared. It was from Inferna- "Jack's Girlfriend" [fire emoji] in the Plexus.

The message read: WYD ???

Neddy replied with a long message detailing the wedding she'd just witnessed, overseen by the Prince himself.

To which the redhead pithily replied, "Bruh xD".

Neddy grinned at her screen.

Inferna went on to ask Neddy if she was ready to take on Aydina, and when Neddy indicated that she was "ready as she would ever be", the other girl sent back:

“Btw I invited 2 other ppl to join us for dodgeball- Morningstar and Balestra if u wanted to look them up! Hope that’s okay 💖💖💖 say hi to jack 4 me!!!!”

Attached to this was a selfie of the candy-redhead eating the apricot tartlets Neddy had paid her with.

Morningstar wasn't a name that Neddy recognised- but Balestra, she knew immediately. She was another Moonstone player- a celestial knight- with a griffin mount. If Neddy wasn't very much mistaken, the griffin ate some of the garden's fae NPCs. And Finvarra still recounted the incident like some sort of disastrous Biblical tale.

Maybe it would be good to have someone like that on her side? If Balestra's griffin ate Aydina, would that be an automatic win?

Neddy replied simply to Inferna with a thumbs-up emoji, but she couldn't help feeling a twinge of doubt.

-

I C T U I U M . to . M E R M A I D . C O V E .

Inferna and her two companions were already waiting in the level 30 foyer—a wide glass room looking into the beachy landscape beyond with huge, flat screens showing players already in action on the level—when Neddy blinked in.

Seeing the sparkling sea spread out to her left, Neddy's first inclination was to start singing “La mer”.

Inferna's disappointment that Neddy had shown up sans Jack was instantly perceptible. The redhead pushed her lip out and raised one hand to her hip.

“Where’s Jack?” she said, pouting dramatically. “I even brought him a huge thing of sugar cubes! And a fresh batch of sauce.”

Neddy pulled an apologetic face. "Sorry, he's been M.I.A. for a couple of days," she told her. "He does that, I'm finding."

A slip of a girl with a crown of curls and a longsword on her hip was leaned up against one of the glass walls. She nodded at Neddy by way of a greeting.

Inferna jerked her chin at her. "That's Balestra," she said, grinning. "Moonstone rider like yourself. Maybe you know her?"

Neddy didn't want to bring up the gardens fiasco in case it was a sore spot with Balestra, and so she lied. "Oh, er, no- I-I don't believe we've met, actually," she stammered. "I'm Neddy. I swear I'm a real rider- my mount is just . . . I don't think he'd be much good at dodgeball anyway."

Three pairs of eyes regarded Neddy. She didn't know why she was so nervous, but she knew everyone could tell that she was.

At least Inferna seemed to be enjoying herself, as usual. She snorted in the silence. "And that's Morningstar over there," she said, thumbing the other player in the foyer.  

The third pair of eyes were almost too haunting to properly look into. They belonged to a ribbon of white slashed with violent red- a crown of berries, Neddy realised. Intimidatingly, a crystal scythe lay across her shoulders and her arms were draped over either side of the polearm. She looked a bit crucified.

The phantom made no move to acknowledge Neddy. However, her strange golden eyes stayed pinned to her.

Neddy merely raised her hand in a meek wave. "Hello."

Morningstar said nothing.

Inferna clapped her hands to break the bizarre tension between the four of them. "Well, let's go kick some ass!" she declared and punched the air. “I just confirmed with the other seven people who agreed to join our party. Three Ammolite, two Obsidian, two Moonstone.”

Neddy was impressed. Inferna was certainly on top of things. Perhaps more apricot tartlets were in order.

Inferna flashed them a cheeky grin. “Let’s go down to the beach?”

-

Neddy considered herself fortunate to have gotten some intimidating figures on her side for this dodgeball match- especially considering the others Inferna had rounded up. Not an inspiring bunch. But Inferna had only been looking to fill out the team.

Mermaid Cove was beautiful. The beach was blush and the sky was bright. The harbour was bustling at one end of the shore and magnificent pirate ships bobbed in the offing. Up the beach, giant pink conch shells were set upright in the sand and hollowed out into stalls that sold necessities like medi-elixirs, pep potions, and replacement gear. An old one-eyed woman with a blue parrot on her shoulder was selling fried octopus tentacles in shell-shaped baskets. A length of fishing net was draped over the market area and all manner of scavenged sea treasures and seashells were strung up, dangling over the customers as they browsed.

Neddy wanted to roam the market area for a while, but Inferna was all business. 

Inferna led them through the intro ordeal, having one of the other players activate the in-game event with the NPC shopkeeper, since Inferna herself had already completed the level and therefore could not activate it again. 

Inferna tapped her foot impatiently as the NPC ran through her whole sob story about how the mermaids had created Angel’s Breath to revive drowned humans, how the pirate queen Aydina and her eleven crew members had killed off all the mermaids to keep Angel’s Breath for herself-

Finally, the NPC said, “If you get the pirates to leave the town, I’ll show you where the last Angel’s Breath is hidden.”

“Great, let’s go,” said Inferna, then she directed the rest of the group to the shoreline.

As they stood on the beach, she threw her finger in the direction of the sea where a massive dome was rising slowly out of the water.

"Look, look!" Inferna shouted. "There it is!"

The others crowded around to watch in awe as the dome continued to surface, throwing off water and a terrible mechanical noise that scraped the ears.

"We're going into that thing?" Neddy asked, her stomach flipping.

Meanwhile, a pirate ship-complete with a skull and crossbone flag-sailed into view. Inferna rolled her eyes. “Yeah, in a sec,” she replied. “Aydina has some dialogue that we have to sit through. God fucking damn, but the NPC shit in this game gets so tedious.”

It wasn’t much longer before Aydina, the pirate queen, sauntered up over to them, her crew right behind her. With an unruly mane of fiery red curls, fierce eyes, and dressed in sheer black chiffon that billowed dramatically in the breeze, with lacy black gloves that went up to her elbows and a pair of badass black boots to match. 

Inferna cut to the chase. Apparently, sometimes you could skip the intro dialogue if you talked faster than the NPCs. “Yo, Aydina! Get the fuck out of here.”

The NPC gave Inferna a disparaging look. “How are you going to make me?”

“I challenge you to a dodgeball game,” she replied tightly, and Aydina nodded her agreement.

“Time to go!” Inferna crowed, evidently pleased that she’d successfully gotten Aydina to skip through most of the annoying dialogue. 

A narrow walkway of roped-together driftwood began to rise out of the sea. It did not look the least bit steady, and Neddy was ready to forego the whole thing just at the sight of it.

The sea is beautiful, yes. But it is also crushing and fathomless. And Neddy had always had a fear of it. The prospect of going beneath the ocean's surface was almost debilitatingly frightening. 

She hated herself for wishing Callum was there to hold her hand.

But no sooner had the thought of him crossed her mind that Inferna was taking her hand and pulling her towards the rickety walkway. 

“Come on, move your ass,” Inferna said, shooting her a playful look as she tugged her along. “Be careful during the actual game, though. Aydina can randomly let water into the court and drain it out whenever she wants. It’s the biggest pain ever.”

Neddy wanted to sink inside herself at that, but- it felt almost as if Inferna was passing some of her chaotic strength through her fingers into Neddy’s. And her feet moved to follow after the redhead. 

-

They marched into the dome, and the door sealed off behind them, metal clanging as the dome sank back under the sea to rest on the sea floor. The dome itself was made out of some kind of transparent material, allowing them to see the various sea creatures and coral formations surrounding the place. 

Inferna paused, causing Neddy to pause too. The redhead seemed to have noticed a throng of excited players making their way back to the foyer, where they’d be able to watch the game on the screens. 

“What?” Neddy wondered, dividing a look between the Inferna’s face and the other players. 

“If we win-” Inferna cut herself off and then winked at Neddy. “When we win, those players will be swarming all over us the second we get back to land- for the Angel’s Breath. Best to have a few ictuium potions on hand.” 

Inferna said as much to Balestra and Morningstar as well. Then, Aydina was explaining the rules of the game to them.

“If the ball-” and here she summoned the “dodgeball” out of thin air, which was an enchanted turtle shell- “hits you, and then hits the ground, you’re out. If you catch the ball, you’re safe. If the ball bounces off of you and one of your teammates catches it, you’re both safe. But, if the ball bounces off of you and someone on the other team catches it, you’re out.”

Inferna cast Neddy a sideways glance. “Don’t get hit,” she advised. “That thing packs a punch on its own, but depending on her mood, Aydina can make it stab you with barnacles, shock you, or spray disgusting gross poisonous stuff that’ll kill you before the time is up.”

Aydina rolled the ball over to where Inferna was standing. “I’ll let you guys have the first go,” she said, smirking confidently at them, looking directly at Inferna. “Since I feel sorry for you. How many brain cells do you have, to be wearing such an atrocious hat?”

“Fuck you!” Inferna shot back as she picked up the ball. “You’re such a fucking cunt.”

The pissed-off redhead gave the other eleven people a questioning look. “Well, should I go for it? Or do one of you guys want to do the honors?”

-

[ You can pick up here or back up a bit or do as you like if you end up taking this quest up ! No instructions for Neddy (but keep in mind she’s not a strong player), just do as you like and make sure they win ! ^^ And, if you need any help at all, just ask either Ayz or me~ ] 

[tellywoodtrash]

ebss 02.07.19 lb

lmao oh NOW commissioner gets here.

“unhe bacha lijiye”??????????? he fell from a cliffside practically the height of the burj khalifa, into a raging river. how the hell could he possibly survive??????

kabir and raghav the only ones who seem to understand science here.

#teamPooja

the backstory about her dad is sooooooooo...... like they totally fucked it up. they're showing him being beaten by multiple sets of mobs and actually getting the girls out of the house, when earlier they showed him bleeding out and telling the girls to run... what is the truth???? not that we care anymore, but for consistency’s sake.

whatever, i'm just here to appreciate this lewk. my favt of the show so far!

hein? what is this line of questioning towards kabir????? YOU explain why and how the fuck did YOU PPL all get here?

..... so y'all are just gonna keep hanging out here on this cliff top huh?

this is so fucking random, pooja. like truly. i get you have some confusing emotions to process rn, but this is just... veryyyyyy random.

didn't even do the whole (or most of the) song. it was literally just 2 stanzas. plus i don't think classical dance is shrenu's forte. i'm not saying this was as painful as alia in GMP, but... it wasn't great enough to make it the showcase of an episode. neither execution wise, nor expression of her rage wise.

overall effect:

these two are taking it so much harder than i'd expected? like i didn't think they were attached to pk beyond guardian/financial provider?

mummy toh alag hi trip pe. ok.

lol chachi being a realist and like “maine suna hai is nadi mein magarmach hain....” 

nope. some other poor rando who also fell in. at the exact same time. wearing the exact same clothes. sounds legit.

ouff ab iska rona dhona dekhna padega episode bhar.

mummy ka delusion still kaafi strong.

“papa jaa chuke hain. ab woh kabhi laut kar nahi aayenge.” haaye bechaara, he knows not the truth of the wonderous universe he exists in. give it 40 - 50 episodes more, son. (if the show lasts that long.........)

COULD KABIR'S PARENTS STOP SHOVING HIM AROUND TODAY???? WE’RE IN THIS WHOLE MESS EXPLICITLY BECAUSE OF IT.

god i feel so bad for this poor schmuck; he's having literally the worst 48 - 72 hours a person could possibly have.

media in tellywood remains as fucking nonsensical as ever.

lmao queeeeeeeeeeeeeen. god i love her. so muchhhhhhh.

amma is concerned at pooja's handle on things now.

shrenu face appreciation break!

oh thank god, rani does live with amma now. i thought she just got out and wandered off, like a lost kitten.

lol this poor akela naukar in the house. the abrupt management change has him all kindsa rattled.

honestly woman, can you let me live??????? what the fuck even is your flawless face!!!!!!!!!!!

kabir having very noble and magnanimous thoughts of ending this whole phadda. let's see how long that lasts. (hint: till the mithai ka dabba gets here.)

lmao raghav, when you planning to tell these ppl that you've been transferred to gwalior and need to gtfoh asap?

oh now, i guess. now's a good time to kick kabir in the nuts, while he’s already down!

wooooooop, mithai dabba is here. shit is about to hit the fan.

this boringass dormant volcano is about to phatofy, i guess.

loving the jaunty glitter glue border!!!!! she's a crafter!!!!!

found the beta that inherited pk's haraami murder genes.

chachi helpfully reminding dhruv that pooja's not really his wife and that she threw the mangalsutra in his face. thanks chachi! his wound was rather lacking in seasoning!

oh ho comment on pooja’s "fitrat" and all. you fucking mittals of all ppl shouldn't claim moral superiority over anyone else. fucking goblins, the lot of you.

^^^^^ this whole conversation in short is as follows -

kabir:

dhruv: 

HEIN?????? TU ISPE KYUN CHADH RAHA HAI???????????? AJEEB CHUTIYA HAI??????? GOD I LITERALLY HATE THIS MILQUETOAST LOSER SO MUCH.

time for kabir to put his hand on his head again. coz life is getting to be a little Too Much.

noble kabir still appealing for peace. it's gonna be so amazingly hypocritical when you break your own peace accord in the next ~24 hours.

pooJanhvi still playing the part well. (btw, why is media not asking how literally no one from the family is here???)

ohhhhhhhhh boy she's going to kholofy the kachcha chitta.

oooooooh apni identity toh bata hi di, but also spun pk's death into a suicide!

lol ok????? she spun this whole shok sabha thing into being about her real identity. it was absolutely unnecessary (wouldn’t she benefit more from still being known as janhvi mittal?????) but...... whatever. i’m just so ready to move on.

———————————————————————

kalllllllllllllllll hoga yudh aarambh! *tashan theme music starts playing*

[roominthecastle]

I’m in this fb tgp group and there was this post abt how they said satan was her type and if they would end up together and all the antis were giving the usual “no they have a father daughter relationship” and like not a single one of them gave a logical reason other than Ted being nearly twice Kristen’s age like god these antis really embarrass me. (sorry if u get a lot of msgs abt this)

Yeah, sadly this is a thing you can never avoid w/ age gap ‘ships, anon, it will always be there. I personally have no problem w/ fans who are like “I prefer to interpret it this way regardless of what canon says or doesn’t say”. I don’t really understand the appeal but I don’t have to understand and I can certainly respect it; no explanation is required since we are all here to have fun. But I have a problem w/ those who act like this claim is canon-to-be-accepted-fandomwide and try to silence/shame/police/harass everyone who disagrees (which still keeps happening in this fandom in rather manipulative and sometimes straight up offensive, disgusting ways).

Claiming they have a f/d relationship in canon and not tolerating/shaming those who see something else there stems from a common thing among antis:

And they never offer a rundown of their thought process bc there isn’t one involved, really. They look at him and reflexively shove him into a stereotypical, one-note role and ignore actual characterization that clashes w/ it – this in the same fandom that keeps echoing “not a girl” 24/7, so we def don’t suffer from irony deficiency. Janet is not reduced to/defined by her looks (which is a good thing ofc), so why is Michael reduced to/defined by a human skin suit he did not even choose in the first place?

Ted “acts against” his appearance as Michael (if you wanna see him in paternal mode, watch him as D.B. on CSI, the difference is palpable). There is always a clash btw what you expect someone looking like him to be like and what he is truly like in this role, which is one major source of fun (the big S1 twist itself is built on fully subverting this expectation) and contributes to the peculiar complexity of the character. You wipe that away when you try to parent zone him.

Chidi and Janet (even Eleanor) have done more ~~parenting~~ on this show than Michael, and he was often the recipient of it, yet I have yet to see either Chidi or Janet (or Eleanor) being referred to as a “parent figure” w/ the pointed expectation that all “decent fans” should agree. Michael isn’t a centered and sage afterlife elder who guides humans. Not at all. He runs around w/o a clear direction, improvising and often ending up in a bigger mess than he started with. He remains inexperienced, lurches from one puzzling problem to the next, and always needs input/guidance from the others. Even in the latest episode we can see him needing/getting a time-out as an “assistant” & Eleanor using her breakup w/ Chidi as a teachable moment to further educate him in human affairs, then it’s Janet she turns to for answers/advice/consolation. I mean, how much clearer do they have to make this? (But I love how that “Satan is my type” comment riled some antis. Satan shape-shifts throughout the story, so - to me - the only plausible explanation for Eleanor reading Paradise Lost is that Milton’s Satan is also a messy bench who loves drama. He even ends up w/ a lil’ crush on Eve when he marches into Eden to mess w/ her, IIRC, but I digress…)

The S3 finale also highlights Michael’s borderline visceral need for occasional ego strokes bc outside his v limited comfort zone (=chained to a desk, following orders and meticulous, ready-made plans) he is still insecure and panics easily (he was already at a disadvantage and anxious when Gen cut his prep time short). The scene where Eleanor is trying to talk him up by calling him a great leader is a good example: it’s a lie, a quick ego stroke, and it doesn’t hold. Him randomly trying to play parent w/ her (= trying to exert control he never had over her and never will) in an earlier episode is a spin on this song, too. The word “self-appointed” is key there bc it literally means “behaving as if you had a quality/position without actually having it”. Both attempts are about his ego, both fail, both get shut down bc there is nothing to sustain them. A f/d dynamic would mean Michael is above Eleanor but that’s simply not true. But Ted summed this up much better here.

None of the core 6 characters has received positive parental guidance (maybe Chidi is an exception but we have yet to learn more about his backstory), so it’s only natural that now they take turns holding each other up to the best of their respective abilities. They all do it. Chidi teaches and guides. Janet protects and gives answers/stuff they need. Tahani organizes. Jason channels the team spirit. Eleanor thinks on her feet, leads, and lies for them. Michael tries and fails and tries again but he remains the most confused bc while he can read the entirety of the world’s literature in an hour, there are no “superior being shortcuts” to gain the experience and wisdom he clearly lacks. Gathering that takes time and quality interaction w/ the humans. It takes opportunities to fail and learn and experiment within meaningful relationships. These are the exact things he is deprived of in S3, so he is not wiser than he was at the end of S2 and he was no parent figure there either.

Locking him into the parent role (esp opposite Eleanor) bc “he looks old” and acting like that’s the be-all-end-all of canon is willful ignorance at best. I bet these are the same type of ppl who, after watching S2, claimed that he was a mentor when back then he was literally Chidi’s student.I don’t think M/E will be canon but they def do not have a f/d dynamic. They are friends and that’s all the labeling we need canon-wise, imo.

[roominthecastle]

Everyone is making a house call to Grissom, where we're y'all when Sara was here lol? And now noone is there to make him soup or shave him apparently :(( *no but srsly, why is everyone sick this episode? Was there some kind of an epidemy on set or sth? *It's Sara calling right? His face just light up)) I'm glad they stay in touch *wait, are those Mythbusters?? Too many nights those crazy dudes kept me company. Fun times... *Where's Sophia? I feel like I haven't seen her in a while... *Warrick 😿

This ep is a goldmine for domestic!Grissom!! cooking, wandering around in pjs and robe, taking care of his dog, and desperately trying but failing to escape visitors & adventures like some reincarnation of Bilbo Baggins.

I guess if a show is on air long enough, it’s almost inevitable to have an episode where the flu or a cold - or a musical event - strikes our faves. I tend to enjoy those eps and this one is no exception. Yes, your eyes weren’t deceiving you, those guest nerds in the lab were Adam and Jamie (CSI has on- and off-screen ties to the Discovery Channel), and oh YES that’s def Sara calling at the end. It’s enough to look at Griss stretch out on the couch after he answers the phone. I think if you lean close, you can hear him purring ;)))) And I kept thinking about it, but rn I honestly cannot recall what happens to Sofia. I think she just… idk… drops out of the story at some point?? and Warrick, yeah… now his departure is something else, like

9x01. How can I even… I AM NOT OKAY!!! Jesus I can’t even formulate anything… They’re all so close… Family… How can I ever be fine after seeing Grissom’s face?? When he just crumbled… Losing someone after allowing them to become that close, I don’t know how to… I’m not ok, with any of this… Glad Sara is there (even more beautiful than before, that’s just not fair) God I’m such a mess. I didn’t even like him all that much but Nicky loved him, and I can’t see him cry! And Gris… JC

What you said, anon. I’m not familiar w/ the specifics of the off-screen events that forced the writers to come up w/ an exit for Warrick/GD, but boy did they manage to make it CRUEL and PAINFUL. but also meaningful, imo. Warrick once called Grissom a robot for never emoting like a “normal” human being, and here we have this “robot” saying the L word out loud and openly breaking down and literally clinging to him in an entirely irrational and desperately emotional, futile human act to keep him alive… yeah, I’m w/ you 1000%: I AM NOT OKAY!!!

9x02. “who are we talking about right now?” A-a-and there is my Sara from first few seasons! God I love that woman. So brave, and strong, standing up for what she believes in, unwilling to talk riddles and play mind games. Just say it straight to her. Kind of understand Grissom too though… This whole thing is so damn sad… Oh and that pillow talk was so tender and quiet, so them…

They’ve been doing this thing ever since they started dating - whenever one makes an observation or drops a remark about a victim or a scene they happen to process, the other is like “okay, is that supposed to be about us?” and it’s never 100% clear. Work and private stuff has been bleeding together w/ them for a while and it is finally starting to make waves in a way that not even Grissom can remain immune to it.

9x05. Why does this show insists on fucking me up this season??! I can’t see them suffer anymore! He’s like a fish out of the water the whole episode… I’m a bit conflicted though. Sara left because she couldn’t take that job anymore and I totally get it, but did she expect him to just follow her? I mean it just doesn’t seem like him at all. Yes he belongs by her side but she moves around, he should have just upended his whole life, without any kind of plan? Perhaps I need to sleep on it tho…

905 is like exhibit A of why I love Lady Heather episodes - she cuts through Griss like no other, and this time there’s a clear overlap btw case and private life. LH’s sugarcoat-free remarks are relevant to both, helping Grissom unpack (or more like rip open) some of his own private mess and climb off the fence he’s been sitting on. I do understand your conflict, I was the same way at first, but then I came to the same conclusion you did below:

9x08. You damn right it’s time to up the ante! This girl is the right girl!! Ugh… 9x09. If Sara was here, she’d help you with that last word… Just saying… *omg is he for real? (I know he is, I’m just really emotional omg) *fly-fishing) his mind is already off of work)) he has been quite distracted lately though. This whole thing is a long time coming. Perhaps all he needed was that push from Sara… *man I love Bill Irwin! Which reminds me, have you watched Legion this year?

(After reading the summary, Legion instantly went on my watchlist, anon, but I haven’t seen it yet.)

Exactly, it’s been a long time coming and that’s why I think Sara was not out of line with her hope - or maybe even reasonable expectation? - that he’d start a brand new chapter with her away from the lab. Most of this relationship happens off-screen, so I can only offer guesswork, but we can find some telltale breadcrumbs leading up to these final episodes.

Grissom already starts displaying burnout signs in S7 + he starts dropping comments about how ppl no longer really need him in the lab anymore. He is not bitter, mind you, he is genuinely proud of the team he’s trained/mentored, but this also means that he becomes - as he tells Warrick - a teacher w/o students who feels increasingly aimless, unfulfilled and even drained after having spent 25+ years wading through the (literal and figurative) cesspools of humanity. I think the combination of developing burnout and unfulfillment is why he grabs at the opportunity to leave for a month and teach a seminar as far away from Vegas as possible, and I don’t think it goes unnoticed by Sara. It is never said out loud (naturally), but she seemed to understand why he just up and left the same way Griss understood why she needed to leave in S8 despite each feeling miserable w/o the other. It’s a constant back-and-forth btw them, a drifting away then back again then away again, as they work through their individual baggage, and this “double pendulum” doesn’t stop until the very last episode of the show.

Uprooting one’s life is a huge ask, esp for someone like Grissom, but in this specific case I think it was a natural progression and would have happened anyway. Sara did not force him out of a pleasant, fulfilling life. He needed - wanted - to move on, he knew it was time, he just needed one more little push, like you said. Then he jumped in w/ both feet

and:

9x10. Oh Lord omfg this is… I… This is like a cinematic experience or something… Oh God his face the very moment he first saw her! Oh my sweet awkward nerdy boy, his eyes!! And that sigh! The smile! And those needy arms!! And Sara omg I just can’t… Yes that’s right just grab her and kiss her, talking’s overrated anyway!! OMG I saw the gifs but I didn’t realize how this scene will be… will make me feel… It’s just so… I’ll get back to you when I’m a bit more coherent, please stand by