#I just went through some incorrect quotes that I have piled up last night

[wordy-little-witch]

So I watched Oppenheimer ((mostly)) for the first time last night and decided some of the lines were. Really good. By golly they were GREAT.

But the movie itself kinda pissed me off, so I stopped about halfway through. Anyway, have some weird incorrect quote meets snippet looking shit bc I love competent Buggy and he deserves to be a lil mad genius

Crocodile had low expectations went he stepped out of the meeting room. Now largely, this would not come as a surprise. He always lowered expectations when Buggy was involved - it was the best he could do for his nerves. The clown was several ounces of unhinged, in both ways expected and entirely, indubitably, vivaciously NOT.

As it was, the logia user believed he avoided aneurysms by sheer luck in the beginning.

Nowadays things had settled more or less. The Guild was running very well, all things considered, their profit was steadily increasing, and every soul on the island had a job or niche they filled happily. He'd even found a few places where Buggy flourished.

This meeting was regarding one of those niches. Aside from being the front man and face of the operation, the clown was also their most skilled chemist, chief explosives expert, and general all-arounder. While he may not go toe to toe with another Emperor in a 1v1 fight, the clown made his uses elsewhere. He was not the blade, the smoking barrel, the weapon - he was the oil in the mechanics of the crew, the fuel to the fires and the one who, more often than not, made the weapons in their hands.

The most recent weapon was the topic for today.

And Buggy was missing.

Annoyed as he was, the logia user remained outwardly calm as he skirted around town in search of the wayward clown. At first, they thought the other may be helping with the legwork of the lower ranks - wouldn't be the first time, certainly would nit be the last - but none of them had seen hide nor hair of the Chairman in days. Unperturbed, Crocodile sent them back to work and continued the search.

Docks were a bust.

The gardens had no hint of blue beyond the specially bred flowers in the back.

The announcement tent was void of bright hair and red noses.

The circus tent had few humans, none of which had seen their captain.

Luckily, Mohji was quick to recommend the kitchens. It was not nearly yet time for a meal, he admitted, but when Buggy fixates on something interesting, he sometimes seems to forget he had a body, let alone one with needs.

That, too, of course, wound up being a failure.

He'd plowed through three cigars already in the impromptu adventures around the isle, and so he was quite close to losing his temper with the apparent and damning lack of clown. Pinching the bridge of his nose, he tried breathing deeply, carefully, working to dampen the embers of rage and fury from a blaze to something smoldering.

It was, ironically, Alvida and Cabaji, who deigned to metaphorically poke the bear otherwise known as their superior, Galdino bustling about back in the kitchens beyond the counter tops.

"What are you looking for?"

"Fucking Hell," he managed to grit out, shooting a look to the duo before him. Cabaji seemed to cringe back minutely, but Alvida just barely winced. "Don't suppose you've seen the damned clown today?"

"Not yet," Al shrugged with a frown, "but once Gal finishes up his... thing over there-" she gestured over to the candle man still aggressively piling snacks and drinks into a bag, "- we're going to find him."

"Well," the older man barked a mirthless laugh, "I can definitely tell you where he's not. Been looking for his ass since seven."

Alvida grimaced, nodding while her fingers toyed with the end of her mace. "Yikes. Meeting?"

"Obviously."

"Captain had a tendency," Cabaji cut in with a rueful expression, "to fixate far too long on something interesting - usually to... rather unpleasant results."

The logia user gave a low growl of a hum, flicking ash from his cigar. "I'll be sure to show him unpleasant once I find him. Bastard missed our meeting and still has yet to show."

The dark haired woman pursed her lips, eyes narrowing. One could nearly see the gears turning in her head. "For the weapons?"

"Somethijg like that," he nodded, "it was initially the firearms he was designing and testing, but it's since expanded to the bombs and other explosives he's been blabbering on about." Glancing down, he paused at the wide eyed look on the other two, shooting a glance over to see Galdino now quietly screaming to himself as he grabbed several first aid kits to throw into the bag. Arching a brow, he turned back. "... am I missing something here?"

"When was the last time you saw him??"

He paused, averted his gaze in consideration. Last glimpse of the clown had been.... what, when they'd gotten the shipment in for Mihawk's eyeliner? Buggy had been picking up something at the docks and had been practically vibrating, in casual clothes as opposed to his onesie suit as he jabbered some poor girl's ear off over a strangely colored box. The emblem had been for a chemical company, he believed, one of the few that Buggy actually trusted to order ores and such from. That had been back on the 23rd. He relayed this to the others.

Alvids winced. Cabaji sighed. Galdino went into the walk in freezer, sealed the door, and muffled screams were heard before he came back out with a tub of ice cream.

"He's probably at his workshop," the wax man stated plainly. "Mohji said he was there on his last shift."

"Shift?"

"Buggy wrangling," the woman answered simply. "When that idiot gets too invested, everything else falls away. Short of a crew emergency, he's essentially a hermit. We take shifts to check on him, make sure he eats or hasn't died somehow."

Crocodile vaguely wanted for a different plant in his smoke source if only to mitigate the pounding in his temples, but he simply nodded, gesturing for them to lead the way.

As it turned out, Buggy's general workshop was near his tent.

His experimental workshop was much, much further out.

And there was cackling coming from inside.

When Galdino took point, the other two fell into place at his back. Believing it to be far from necessary for such formations, Crocodile considered barging past them all.

Then the door swung open and a blue blur damn near slammed into the wax user.

Buggy was a veritable mess, smudges on his cheeks, a line pressed across his cheek bones and bridge of his nose, mildly irritated from the red-pink lines. The shadows around his eyes made the blue of his irises seem lighter than usual, especially with the glassy, manic spark to them. His hair was in a bun, mostly, loose strands bouncing with the many pencils, pens and.... beaker(???) tucked in there.

He was sans makeup, only the barest red stain to hip lips, Crocodile noticed, as the giggly man almost squealed.

"Guys! Oh em gee, hiiii~" His arms clung to the taller man, almost clambering up as her shimmied and bounced. "I did a thing," he blabbered excitedly, "and it's SO COOL and I wanna tell Croco-chan and Hawky and everyone and it's gonna be so cool, I promise, so super duper mega ultra cool and- OH HI CROCCY COME SEE!!!!"

As if the natural whirlwind of a clown was not bad enough, it seemed Buggy was running on pure liquid energy. Hands coveted in gloves clenched hard on his hook and bodily dragged him into the workshop as their owner seemed to word vomit in a language all too unknown for the businessman to follow. He caught a few bits and pieces of things here and there, trying to follow the other and rebalance himself - the blue haired man had nearly yanked him straight off his feet - when he caught sight of some chalk boards, cork boards and entirely too many letters, numbers, symbols and a graph, of all things, emblazoned nearly across the entire far wall.

Alvida sighed softly, earning a glance. She gestured back to Buggy.

When he turned, it was to be met with the clown bouncing on his toes, clapping as he looked between the larger man and a decently sized ball on the table.

Uncertain as to what exactly he was looking at and unsure of how exactly to handle this manic man, Crocodile simply blinked. "What... is this, again?"

"It's my prototype," the other squeaked, moving to rub his cheeks roughly with a grin, hands falling to shake roughly at shoulder height as he beamed. "See, I was working on those guns ya know. And so as I was doing the papers, I was thinking to myself, 'ya know buggy ol boy, you haven't checked the Idea Book in a while' and so I was like 'yeah, brain I haven't!!' So I DID and when I did, I saw some old theories on explosives and how Buster Calls work because the Navy is fucking batshit and decided anyone not good enough for them deserves to blow up so then I thought 'oh I wanna make my own buster call but BUGGY STYLE', so I went to my theory section and theory can take you only so far, so THEN I reached out to Emie-chan!!! And she had some AWESOME scientific journals because she works for Sky-Lines, that big big big lab, and I was reading them and it HIT ME, HYDROGEN!!!!" Small but calloused gloved hands caught Croc's hoop again as Buggy turns back to rambling, the former catching a few words here and there between the waterfall of words. Something about neutrons, chain reactions, and heavy hydrogen? He blanked.

"Buggy," a softer voice cut in. The two highest ranking men in the room turned, catching sight of Alvida and Cabaji both frowning, the former leaning into the latter while Galdino tried to hand her an apple. The wax man had spoken, looking to the captain. "I'm sorry to interrupt but 'Vida's been feeling unwell for a while-"

Immediately, the unstoppable hurricane of a clown seemed to practically teleport with the speed he got over there with. "What happened, what's wrong?"

"Cramps," she grimaced, hand moving to her abdomen. "No big deal, Bugs-"

"You haven't eaten," Cabaji cut in with a definite attempt at a worried scowl.

"I don't want to," she grumbled, taking hidden glances at Buggy.

The jester for his part took her hands gently. "You gotta eat, Vida, it should help your body settle."

She put on a show of deliberating, then, in a voice Crocodile had never heard from her before, she struck. "Will you eat with me?"

"Of course," Buggy assured, reaching out to take the apple in hand. A green one was handed to Alvida and they playfully bonked the two fruits together before biting into them.

Buggy hummed. "These are pretty good! Ya know, I don't think I've had this kind of apple before what kind is it?"

"Night night apples."

"What."

And then suddenly there was a thump, the other three quickly separating while Galdino pulled out the first aid kit, Alvida grabbing a cloth, and Cabaji checking other over for injuries.

Crocodile stared.

"What the fuck just happened?"

"Sometimes you gotta manipulate a clown into eating a drugged apple," Vida said without hesitation. "Any concussion?"

"Seems fine," Cabaji nodded, glancing to Galdino who quickly confirmed.

Once certain there were no wouldst, Alvida passed over the cloth and went to a filing cabinet, humming softly as she flicked through the folders before pulling out one covered in cutesy duck stickers, labeled 'for croco-baby' on the tab. She handed it over with a smile.

Now possibly far more confused than before, he took the folder and watched as the unicyclist picked up the clown easily and all three trotted out casually. He watched them head back to the tents, carefully avoiding prying eyes, and dip into Buggy's personal tent with no ounce of hesitation.

Fucking hell.

He needed a stiff drink. Or several.

He looked at the folder. A little duck sticker was winking at him, holding a heart.

Make that damned case.

[creamecream]

Wicker: *notices Blance watching Satan and Asmodeus argue, lovestruck expression on his face.*

Wicker: *snickers.* “yup! it’s clear as day! you are definitely in love with him!”

Blance: “don’t be silly! what would a demon like Satan be appealing to a homely, uninteresting boy like me?”

Wicker: “I never said who you fell for, Blance.”

Blance: *freezes!*

Blance: “damnit!”

@abyssnighthawk

[notesfromthebench]

Letter 1

Dear Friend,

I felt unintelligent for the majority of my school life. Specifically though, from the age of 12, I felt hugely inferior to everyone else in my class and my year group. Looking back now, I can see that I wasn’t given the tools to truly understand how being dyslexic, and dealing with (as of that time undiagnosed) severe mental health problems, would affect my ability to learn. What appeared easy to grasp and do for my friends would seem impossible to me. I would come home from school and not do my homework, as I felt that there was no point working on something which I didn’t understand and would be incorrect. I knew I would fail, so I did nothing; I didn’t want to really set my mind to working independently at home, away from the help of may peers and my teachers, to ultimately have my worst fears confirmed: that I wasn’t good enough, and never would be.

The feeling of being less than, and never enough, would live inside me, corrupting my every thought, until I turned 18 or 19. To my younger self, there was just one way to release this, and that was to physically give it room to escape my body. I had been self-harming on and off from the age of 11, but it grew to a near nightly ritual when I was 14. I would come home from school, head upstairs to my room, shut the door, put my schoolbag down on the floor, head over to the back corner and begin. In the span of five or ten minutes, I could work out my frustrations about my day into my skin. I would attend school with arms and thighs covered in cuts, scars, burns and bruises. I was cautious, and to my knowledge, no teacher ever found out – or if they did, they never said anything. Looking back, it’s laughable that to me that, at the time, I thought I wasn’t unwell- I knew that hurting yourself wasn’t normal, but I also was aware that there were hundreds of people online with far more dramatic injuries than myself, or friends who were also struggling: I wasn’t that bad. Nevertheless, I knew that what I was doing to myself was abnormal, and should be kept secret. I would wear my PE skort under my uniform to hide my thighs, and I would play sports in my school jumper- changing quickly, in order to expose my arms for the shortest possible period of time.

Throughout the school day, I would go to a bathroom stall and just stare at what I had done to myself, proud of the fact that I was finally taking control and punishing myself for not being good enough. I would skip lunch, saying that I had homework to complete, and I would just stay on the floor of my form room, listening to music, and running through every reason as to why I was an awful human being. And this created a cycle. I would head to class, where I would be reprimanded for not completing my homework, and have my flaws pointed out to me in red pen, and to me, I would take this as confirmation that every time I hurt myself, that I deserved it, and that it would ultimately help me. I had literally fallen into a routine of self destruction; I had fallen into having a fully fledged addiction without really realising it. I was convinced that I was in control- hell, the element of control was the appeal. However, I would then notice scars fading under new ones, and I would feel a huge sense of dread and loss, and rush to replace them. My greatest fear was that someone would notice and make me stop – I needed this to function. Once, when sat in my safe space, against the radiator in my form room, a group of people were sat around me talking about self harm. I remember being petrified when one girl, sat in front of me, grabbed my right hand and rolled up my sleeve. I still can vividly feel the relief I felt that she had selected the wrong arm. However, that event made me more manipulative, and far better at hiding it. I would lie about injuries, claiming sprains in order to wear a bandage over my arms, I would permanently hold my jumper sleeve down by my fingers, I would cover my wrist in plasters, under my watch and wristbands.

I’m so lucky that my scars have faded the way that they have, and although the ones on my thighs are noticeable, I am able to conceal the ones of my arms with make-up easily enough. However, all these memories have been dredged up in the past few days. Lately, the weather has been getting colder and we’re heading towards fall. But with colder weather, comes the fact that older faded scars become more prevalent on the skin, especially being as fair as I am. Brushing my teeth, and groggily leaning against the sink for support, I glanced down and noticed that there were patches of my arm looking darker than usual. After heading to collect my glasses, I saw the remnants of a scar I had all but forgotten about (unless dredging through old journals, or in a particularly difficult spiral of shame and depression). Anyone could see it, and not notice the significance, but memories came flooding back.

When I was 16, after getting a mock GCSE paper back and gaining a mark considerably lower than my friends, I went home in shame, and carved the word stupid into my forearm. I remember it vividly, how calm I was, despite falling apart and screaming on the inside. I was methodical. I remember thinking I wanted it to be ‘unintelligent’ but I was scared that it wouldn’t fit, or that I would spell it wrong, and that I would be saddled with a spelling mistake blazoned on my arm for the rest of my life, validating my lack of intelligence to all who saw. I settled with stupid- this thought process was further confirmation to me that this brand was exactly what I needed. I remember finishing and being very proud of myself. I cleaned myself up, and settled in for a night of sitting on the internet, and neglecting the mounting pile of homework I was studiously ignoring. It wasn’t until I lay in bed that night that I realised that the very next day. I had another HPV jab due at school. Panic filled me. I grabbed my journal, and came up with plans of action of how to hide my forearm when being injected by a nurse in my upper bicep. Bullet points to detail how I was planning on lying about my dominant hand, wearing an arm brace and saying that I had slammed it into the car door, or faking illness and saying that I couldn’t have the vaccine that day. It was as though I were writing a shopping list. Seeing that now, it hurts to know that i was so isolated, and yet so convinced that this behaviour was rational. I was so proud of myself for coming up with my backup plan of wearing the brace, as the nurse who administered my vaccine that day said that it did not matter that I was supposedly left-handed, and proceeded to roll up my left sleeve. Still, after having the vaccine, I went to the little seating area, and, whilst the other people there were helping a classmate who was so terrified she had brought her stuffed toy frog to accompany her that day, I quickly rolled down my sleeve and felt safe in the knowledge that I had gotten away with it. I had outsmarted everyone, and continued to hide my destructive routine.

I’m 23. I left my home city and had the greatest time at University, and whilst relapse is an inevitable part of recovery, I can look back and see how far I’ve come, and realise all the hard work I had to put in, in order to claw my way out of that mental space which would worsen dramatically before it would get better. And, I’m not stupid. I categorically am not. Yes, I need extra time, and I need to put in more work than someone who doesn’t have dyslexia or any other learning disability, but that doesn’t make me stupid. It means that I’m willing to work my butt off in order to get where I want to go. It functions as a daily reminder that, regardless of the fact that there are days when it’s harder to locate than others, I’m determined to get to a place where I’m happy, both career wise, and mentally.

I am also old enough, and have enough hindsight and reassurance, that just because someone else is a lot smarter than you, it doesn’t make you any less intelligent. I would never dream of conflating a grade on a paper or test now with my personal worth. It wouldn’t even cross my mind. Around this time, I read Harvey and found this quotation, which in a way only a 16 year old could, displayed it across my social media platforms: “Years ago my mother used to say to me, she’d say, […] ‘In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.’ Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant.” Look at me, I’m philosophical and I read. Maybe I was hugely missing the point of what Elwood was attempting to convey here, or I was setting a goal for myself, either way, it’s laughable to look back at 16 year old me, obsessed with this quote, and thinking that I had also chosen being oh so pleasant. I was cruel to myself, and was permanently grumpy due to lack of sleep and exhaustion. I was not a nice teenager. Nonetheless, at some point over the last 4 years, I chose to be oh so pleasant, and my intelligence didn’t falter, but grew, when in an environment in which I was wholly supported. I leaned that, although I was so unbelievably privileged and lucky to have been given the education I had, an environment which strives for academic excellence, and prides itself on league table positioning was not one in which I could thrive. Whilst this is obviously beneficial to lots of students, it’s taken a long time to not feel guilty in saying that the system that prioritises those things was not one which was helpful to me, especially when I consider the handful of teachers who really did positively impact my life. And that’s ok. People learn in different ways. It just took me a little bit longer, and a little bit more work, than everyone else.

From,

Your Friend on the Bench

[sapphoesie]

10 Questions Tag - idek what part this is

Thanks to the lovely people who tagged me: @highladyofnorta @dr-woodsprite @lovelylittlebookwyrm @reading-through-the-night @acourtoftears @arya-drottning @wingsofanillyrian

1. Favourite book of all time ugh it’s too hard to choose only one! 2. What are you reading now I’m re-reading/listening to Rebel of The Sands by Alwyn Hamilton 3. Have you ever considered writing a book Yep. I want to do it at one point. Not necessarily fiction though 4. Favourite series Of all time? Probably Harry Potter 5. Book you’d like to read You mean choose just one out of my 370 books on my TBR? 😂 Ughhh... a random one is Anna Karenina. I really want to get into Russian literature but obviously the size of the book has kinda put me off so far 6. What’s in your TBR pile? EVERYTHING! But I’ll mention the books I already own and have with me in Australia: The Raven Boys, Traitor to the Throne, The Wrath and the Dawn and The Rose and the Dagger 7. Favourite fictional characters too many to list! 8. Favourite ship of all time oh man! Maybe Gatsby and Daisy cause it was so dysfunctional but so interesting 9. Pick up the book closest to you, open it to page 1 and write the first paragraph: “It would not be a welcome dawn.” the first para is actually just one sentence so that’s all you get  10. What’s the first book fandom you were in? Harry Potter

1. what type of a phone do you use. I have an iPhone 2. if you could kill someone this instant would you do it? No even though  I have a person who popped into mind instantly lol 3. ends justify the means. do you agree? This is literally the biggest question in journalism so I’ve debated this a lot in the past years with different hypothetical scenarios. I would say no but it’s an extremely tricky question 4. favorite holiday place/city/country. Cote D’Azur on the southern French coast is one of my favourite places ever 5. if your choices were to sing or dance your way out of a bind what would you choose ? why ? I think I’d choose singing cause I’d become self conscious about my dancing if I was put on the spot like that but I’m always good to sing 😂 6. favorite author! Edgar Allan Poe. I read his complete works, I read about the stories and inspirations behind his writing and I read about his life. I’m just so fascinated by him. 7. best tv shows that you think everyone should watch. Friends. 8. the most underrated book in your opinion. All the light we cannot see! Gorgeous prose, beautiful story. Still one of my favourite books 9. the most overrated book in your opinion. Eleanor & Park. 10. have you ever been to the opera ? if yes , describe your experience. if no, do you plan to, are you interested ? Omg yes! My mum and I used to go all the time to operas and ballet shows and classical music concerts and it was always so beautiful and such a magical experience. The opera house in Bucharest is really beautiful (here’s a picture) and I loved the atmosphere in there.

1 - Do you like cold weather or hot weather? I prefer moderate temperatures 2 - Do you actually like studying? I love it! 3 - Dream vacation? New Zealand or Japan atm 4 - Say one thing you like about your home country The scenery in Romania is breathtaking 5 - What’s your favorite book atm? Lord of Shadows probably 6 - What do you like about your best friend? Really easy to talk to 7 - When was the last time you did something nice to someone? I held the door for someone this morning 8 - Do you like shopping? Depends what I shop for and what mood I’m in 9 - Most embarrassing memory of your childhood? I fell off a bike and onto my face once 10 - How would you react if a flirty anon showed up in your ask box? I’d say “ Damn, nonnie, that was smooth af! You’re making me blush but, you know, a dinner or something would be nice first” (I looked back for my actual respons to flirty anon’s first message)

1. Bookmarks or random objects? Bookmarks. 2. Do you prefer harcover or softcover or E-book? Paperbacks all the way 3. What is your favourite book or series that you own? Harry Potter probably 4. Do you have a character that’s your absolute favourite? I have too many! 5. Do you have a character that you completely hate? I can’t think of any off the top of my head... 6. If you could change one thing about a book you like/dislike, what would it be? Why? More diverse characters. Because there aren’t nearly enough. 7. As a child, was there a picture book that you liked? It isn’t really a picture book but it does have pictures so The Little Prince. I was (and still am) in love with that book! 8. Have you come across a fantasy creature that you wanted as a pet? A wyvern from TOG or a Hippogriff from Harry Potter  9. Do you bring a book everywhere with you or not? Not always but technically I always have books on my phone so if in need, I have what to read. 10. If you could pick a book made into a film and turn it into a well-done television series, what would you choose? Percy Jackson and the Olympians

1. What fandom(s) are you apart of? mostly Sarah J Maas stuff,Leigh Bardugo, Cassandra Clare, Harry Potter 2. Top 3 TV shows of all time Friends. Parks and Recreation. The Office. 3. Favorite form to consume books? (audiobooks, e-books, physical books) Physical copies. 4. Must have pizza toppings. Tomato sauce, mozarella, pepperoni. I’m not hard to please. 5. What did you want to do when you were a kid? I wanted to be a teacher for a long time. I would definitely go into teaching if the wages weren’t a joke. 6. What is your favorite “internet inside joke”? The incorrect [insert fandom here] quotes  7. What is your taste in music? Eclectic. 8. What are you most proud of? Getting into a top/Russel Group university as an international student 9. Last thing you ate? a salad 10. Favorite gif to use?

1. If you could bring any fictional character to life, who would it be? Cassian 2. Favourite time period? the 70s 3. If you could swap lives with one character for the day, who would you pick? Hermione Granger 4. Top three authors you want to meet? Cassie Clare, Sarah J Maas, Leigh Bardugo 5. Favourite place to read? anywhere comfy by a window 6. Which book quote can you always remember off the top of your head?  “If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors not his equals.” from Harry Potter 7. Are you a one book or multiple at a time kind of person? One at a time 8. Are there any books you regret reading? No. 9. Pick one book you want to be adapted into a film/show and one you dont. Yes: All the Light We Cannot See. No: ACOTAR  10. Dogs or cats? Both.

1. Black or white? Black. 2. Pineapples on pizza? No. 3. Chocolate or caramel? Chocolate. 4. Role model fictional character? Hermione Granger. 5. Favorite villain? Amy Dunne 6. Least favorite main character? I’m not a big fan of Alina Starkov 7. Fictional world/country you want to live in? Idris maybe 8. Favorite indie author? What qualifies as an indie author? 9. A book/series/tv show that everyone loves but you hate? I don’t know off the top of my head 10. Classic or modern? Why not both? 11. What’s your favorite question to be asked and how would you answer it? How’s life?

1.  What countries have you visited? Well this is relative cause for some of them I’ve seen loads and for others I’ve only seen a couple of cities: Romania, Bulgaria, Greece, Hungary, Italy, France, The UK, Ireland, Spain, Belgium, Egypt, Australia, Germany, Austria, Switzerland, Serbia, Slovenia and I think that’s it. 2. What’s your favorite word at the moment? Stupendous. 3. What is your preferred writing utensil? fountain pens 4. What’s one book that everyone else loved but you didn’t enjoy? Eleanor and Park. 5. Who’s your ultimate BROtp? Harry, Ron and Hermione. Brot3 forever. 6. Dream job? Investigative journalist or news producer for TV or Radio news. 7. Best advice you have ever received? Think if what you’re worrying about will matter in 10 years’ time. 8. What fictional character would you love to meet? Liesel Meminger  9. If you could time travel, where would you go? tell young me that life is all ups and downs but it’s going to be okay 10. Favorite thing to do on a rainy day? get a cup of tea and read in front of the fireplace 11. What was the last concert you went to? Twin Atlantic.

[getseriouser]

20 THOUGHTS: Les Bleus triumph despite Bolton as coach

THANK you Croatia.

Whilst this column had no vested interest in the result of Monday morning’s final, and whilst sad for Croatian fans we aren’t devastated personally.

But for preventing the utter implosion of society as we know it if the English got to the final obstacle, had made the final with a chance to win it all, we can’t be more appreciative.

Avoiding that though has given no solace to those heavies at Princes Park, that pain and suffering doesn’t look like remedying itself anytime soon..

1.       The Pies have done well this year to have the record they do with the injuries they’ve endured, particularly as mentioned last week being number one in the league for games lost. Last Sunday, when it really mattered, fielding a few players that probably didn’t deserve or warrant a game but were out there because so many others were unavailable through injury might have cost them in the end.

2.       As a result we see Jeremy McGovern getting all the plaudits for a great game. He played on Brody Mihocek in a forwardline that was basically centered around a first-year player who isn’t a tall forward but through makeshift design being asked to play like one. If McGovern didn’t take a tonne of marks last Sunday you’d drop him to the WAFL, let’s be steady on the enormous praise.

3.       The real key for the Eagles on the day though was the return of half of their forward line at once. West Coast’s record in 2018 when all of Kennedy, Darling and LeCras play is nine wins from nine games. When one or more of the three miss is three wins from seven. Percentage-wise, with all three 143.79%, 99.14% otherwise.

4.       Sling tackle on Robbie Gray, can't do much differently, pin arms crucial to not allowing the tackled player to get a disposal, was he too firm, perhaps, was it holding the ball, absolutely. Do we get to a stage where duty of care means you must allow the player you're tackling a free arm? We don't want players knocked out, but from a technique perspective, I'm not sure what the perfect alternative would be? Yes, there was a sense of sling about it, but it wasn’t the old fashioned rugby league pick up and turn, it was all in essence, especially in real time against the harshness of slow mo, one motion. Hate the injury, but if it was Sam Gray, and not Robbie, and he got up instead of being concussed, its not even a fine.

5.       Speaking of which, how many fines?! We like less suspensions, sure, but if you just measure on reports that result in sanctions, given the amount of fines being handed out each and every week the sport’s never been dirtier? Or are we just going too silly with $1000 here and $2000 there? The latter for mine.

6.       "Geelong champion Jimmy Bartel says the AFL should consider having an "independent list analyser" in a bid to fast track rebuilds."

"I think there should be someone in the AFL football department, they got teams of thousands down there at HQ, that should be almost an independent list analyser of clubs because that's where clubs get themselves in biggest trouble".

Jim. No.

7.       James Sicily injury, who is an AA lock to this point, will really hurt the Hawks. Yes, their run home is soft, but still, he has a massive influence with or without the ball. Top five on their list for influence on their results.

8.       Port are cosy with the two extra wins on those outside the eight, but Paddy Ryder out for a little while is going to hurt. They aren't scoring enough, and none of their final seven games are gimmies. A ripe chance to fall out, danger games are the Doggies down in Ballarat followed by the Showdown in Rounds 19 and 20 respectively.

9.       "Advanced negotiations have brought 100m and 200m world record holder Usain Bolt to the brink of a shock trial with the Central Coast Mariners, with the promise of a season-long contract on offer if he proves himself in a six-week audition".

What? Oh gosh.

10.   "It would be easy to sneer, and to suggest that marketing expediency has apparently superseded football decision making. Yet the fundamental problem that the A-League has is its abandonment by great swathes of Australian general sports fans."

Incorrect. It’s the abandonment by the pure football fan, who supports Barcelona, who switched to Optus just to get the EPL, who has already bought a Juventus Ronaldo jersey. And this does nothing but widen that divide.

11.   Saints Blues got almost 34k to Friday night, not bad really after all. Dees Bulldogs the next day, at the MCG, decent afternoon weather-wise, not on free-to-air, just over 30k. Sure, some cheaper tickets helped Friday, but with Melbourne 10-6 they would be most disappointed.

12.   Stephen Silvagni took the points on Footy Classified. Caro went down a route of relying on the phrase " it’s my understanding" which she can’t or does not need to prove, put her on a hiding to nothing and SOS was more than happy to make sure for of that. And Lloyd was more than competent asking the question, but was found out when the interviewee, who had clearly prepared better than the panel, answered said questions with a question back. Whether you blame the Silvagni list management regime or not, he had an answer for everything and absconded any heat the media would like to pile on his role in the club’s situation.

13.   Mind you, Carlton are a live chance to finish the year with one win, and other than the expansion teams in their embryonic years, that’s just unheard of, so something has to give, or some internally have to royally cop it.

14.   Whack Tom Mitchell time of the week, 43 touches in the loss to Brisbane on Saturday. Seven tackles, five inside 50s, two clearances. Influence? Bout the same as someone with half the disposals? Meanwhile Dayne Beams, 33 touches, eight inside 50s, seven clearances, four rebound 50s. Interesting, the coaches votes. Beams and Hugh McCluaggae (29 touches) got seven votes each, Stefan Martin (17 touches, 33 hitouts), Josh Walker (20 touches, kept Roughead goalless) and Jaeger O'Meara (27 touches) got five each. Not a single vote for Mitchell.

15.   That award's becoming a race in three, Max Gawn with a perfect 10 from the coaches against the Bullies (17 touches, 41 hitouts, seven marks) is leading by three from Patrick Cripps, Shaun Higgins in third a further six votes behind.

16.   Rising Star, probably a race in two, Jaidyn Stephenson and Ben Ronke. The Pie has 25 goals from 16 games, the Swan is arguably bettering though with 21 from 11. Alex Witherden is coming home with a wet sail however, 31 and 27 touches the last two weeks, he keeps up the leather poisoning he could pinch it.

17.   Nic Naitanui is influential in the same way Cyril Rioli was (how strange to use past tense for him already?) in that he mightn't record the numbers of his peers but what he does with it is so much better it compensates. However, where the Eagles can probably survive is that Scott Lycett is a bonafide no.1 ruck in his own right. Nathan Vardy and Fraser McInnes are reasonable enough no.2 guys if they chose to play the same system. They'll be just fine, he is nowhere near as important to their chances as good a player he is in isolation; the 'net loss' is minimal. The loss of Naitanui to say a Vardy is somewhat offset by the better utilisation of Lycett.

18.   Buddy 900 goals, only happened eight other times. Last time was Matty Lloyd in 2009, who he is only 24 goals away from and could within reason catch before the year's out. He catches Leigh Matthews in 13 goals time.

19.   Steve Hocking is going hell for leather with starting positions, it being that there are three pairs in each fifty for every stoppage. I implore you all, next time you attend the footy, when there's a stoppage, if the ball is somewhere in neutral territory, look to see how many are inside 50, its almost six at each end as is. So that will do nothing. The key one though is if the ball is inside 50, you are sending six players who might be on centre wing or even closer all the way back to the other 50.

And when it comes to that, I've said it before, but let me quote ripper footballer Dayne Zorko, part of a recent trial of said rule, on why that's crap: "waiting for the forwards and defenders to head back to the box, that was eight or nine seconds that the game probably could’ve played for." Nathan Buckley this morning too said the constant waiting for pairs to get back into position at every stoppage would be a “blight on the game”. So you'll free up the wing from congestion, but we'll extend quarters by a minute or two as a result. Yeah, real winner Steve!

20.   Such a shame. We really live in a multicultural society full of new generations and diaspora from all corners of the globe so who cares if Allir Allir was born in Kenya and not Keilor and Majak Daw was born in Sudan and not Sandringham. But yes, cool, there are positives in terms of glass ceilings, I get that and don't refute them, yet why make the fuss? Chose to not take the lens of seeing the ethnicity over the skillset and just celebrate or critique them regardless. But even then, to cop yesterday that "there is real concern about Sudanese gangs … you’d have to be walking around with your hands over your ears in Melbourne not to hear it." Not from Shannon Noll, this is from the top office, esteemed Prime Minster Malcolm Turnbull. You overlay that with the wonderfully consistent work of social progressionist and friend to all Home Minister Peter Dutton who tells us that Melburnians are "are scared to go out to restaurants of a night time because they are followed home by these gangs…. we just need to call it for what it is, of course it’s African gang violence."

Peter Dutton needs to spend less time looking like the product of a peeled King Edward potato that had awful yet successful sex with Voldemort's racist, inbred cousin and worrying about whether I'm concerned Allir Allir is going to follow me home. Why? Firstly, he lives in Sydney, and I don't. Secondly I'm not that sure it would be in that young man's interest, we've never met, I didn't invite him, I'm confused. Or that Majak Daw might rob me this weekend in some back alley of the city.  He won't, I don't think he is that way dispositioned, no more so than anyone else from any background for that matter. He is more interested with getting a kick, so is Allir Allir, and Bachar Houli and Clayton Oliver and Chloe Molloy and whoever else you want, Peter.

Now Peter, Mr Potato, moron, mistake, whatever your real name is, I went to a restaurant last night and I was totally fine. Statistically my de facto partner was in far more danger when I headed home than I was of anyone with ancestral African links following me or causing me serious harm. Peter. Stop it. You're an embarrassment and quite frankly putting me off baked potatoes, which are delicious..

  (originally published 18 July)