#I just think it’s neat that so many cool creative things are spotlighted during this month

[bunibelles]

I can’t believe pride month is almost done :’D

[shellsinadune]

ok so i'm back, i've slept on it, here are some things i loved about the darlinghurst great comet (in no particular order - spoilers if you want to be surprised by the creative decisions):

the drinks were great, i don't drink so i had the war and peach at the intermission and it had glitter in it!! btw just in general love when theatres change the name of a drink for the show ('anatole spritz' (aperol spritz) tickled me)

everyone was so kind, i got complimented on my outfit and the person (usher? idk the word) was really helpful

the building was accessible in a way i wasn't used to. the accessible bathroom had those buttons to open and lock the door, idk whether the changing place was adequate for adults but it was there. there was a lift between the upper and lower ground floor so i could actually go down those half floor stairs that i usually just have to sit at the top of

the use of the (massive) disco ball was beautiful, i started crying during no one else and the little specks of light spinning like snow were a contributing factor in that

the costumes!!!! they definitely did their own thing with them. natasha's opening dress with the sleeves and anatole's crop top were highlights but the whole thing was cool. most of the fem clothes had a sort of babydoll vibe to them?? idk how to describe it.

sonya alone was beautiful, many of the solos (notably also pierre and dust and ashes) were performed as if the character was writing/singing a song rather than the actor performing the characters' thoughts, if that makes sense?? but just the spotlight on her, her playing the piano and singing..... it wasn't what i was expecting, but it allowed a nice little rest between bigger numbers and let me focus on the singing

the whole cast was so talented though, i think every actor played an instrument at some point which is super impressive. some of them had cellos strapped to them half the time and were still dancing.

the theatre was so small that i'm pretty sure the cast could fully see me sobbing in the back row at the end. that is how great comet should be.

the jumping skills were impressive. not just during the abduction but also when people were getting off the stage.

i like how opb's movements were mostly controlled by other actors dragging his clothes around. my dad and i had a conversation about whether it's symbolic of his privilege (having a bunch of yes man servants) or of his declining mental state (being controlled by his dementia (?) instead of what he used to be)

danatole rights in the duel and preparations (they are so dysfunctional <3). anatole grabbing at dolokhov's chest and kissing his neck when 'a fact known only to his intimates' *chefs kiss*

marya's actor wasn't performing and the swing was playing helene so the production manager (?) was playing marya. given that she didn't know the role perfectly (she had the script in hand) she did really well!!!!

the 2 little balconies were great, they added a lot of dimension to the stage. (for those wondering, to my memory the songs performed in the balconies were: pierre, natasha and sonya in the opera, natasha & anatole, dust and ashes, pierre in letters, preparations, anatole in find anatole, and pierre & anatole)

GENDERQUEER ANATOLE!!!!! the way they would switch octaves mid line <3333

actually multiple of these actors are trans/gnc!!!!!!!

there was no/very little ensemble so you could hear every individual voice during the harmonies

the program is gorgeous, there are little glossy constellations all over it which makes a nice texture

the choreography in charming was so neat. love those little shoulder wiggles.

no strobing in the duel (but yes strobing in the opera when anatole comes in)

they did something with the lighting during the ball kiss that sort of made it look like a veil of light and a little strip of darkness spinning around them. if i'm going to analyse it conveys natasha's confusion while giving her privacy. or something i can't figure out the words to explain it.

not really intentional but right before the bit of the opera with the show, they stopped the performance for a bit. idk why. but it was charming and helpful for me because i had to ground a bit.

i cried 7 times. my head hurt by the end of it.

the use of silence was so good. like pauses between songs, in the middle of them, idk just. you know that post about how live theatre conveys loneliness better than anything else? yeah.

i know i already said this but i kept putting these as separate points so i'll just say all the actors' performances are SO GOOD. natasha and sonya were like..... scarily well cast btw

the 'no, i am enjoying myself at home this evening' line was performed so well

i didn't get an on stage seat but they were sitting at a long table type thing that was actually part of the stage and the cast were literally dancing directly in front of them

i like the fact they didn't try to find gender conforming audience members to bring up (in this performance, mary's suitor was fem presenting and opb's 'cheap french thing' was masc presenting). they didn't change pronouns to try and match the gender presentation of whoever they called up. same with the actors during the abduction (matryoshka etc).

finally managed to id the woodwind instrument in the 'he'll come home one day and take me away, i want nothing more' bit ('twas a clarinet). that was bugging me for years.

the comet was depicted by natasha's actor holding a big lit up ball and slowly walking through the mid-audience bit of the stage. when the song ends she gives it to pierre and he holds it until it's the only light in the room. something something hope.

they didn't directly copy the recording, there were variations in the tune that caught me off guard (in a good way) and they pronounced things the way that was most natural for an australian performance instead of trying to americanise.

overall, the only thing i would want for is to have a recording for sale, because my memory is so shit that i remember something that happened yesterday about as well as i can remember being 4 years old (not an exaggeration). i'm sort of sad that i can't see it again and again, which is just part of ~the magic of theatre~ but also a sign that it's really that good.

(anyway i highly recommend it if you're in sydney before the 20th of august)

[gunterfan1992]

Interview with Half Shy (the songwriter of “Monster”)

For the last few months, I’ve been collecting information for a second edition of Exploring the Land of Ooo that will also cover the production of Distant Lands. This means that I’ve started to look into the new songs that we have been graced with this year, and this of course includes “Monster,” the beautiful track from the masterpiece that is “Obsidian”. And so I reached out to the song’s writer, Half Shy, who was kind enough to chat with me via email about the songwriting process!

(Photo courtesy of Half Shy)

In many ways, Half Shy is living the creative Adventure Time fan’s dream: She got asked by Adam Muto himself to write a song for “Obsidian” after he heard her music through Bandcamp! (I’ve dabbled in fan music before, and the fact that someone from the show might listen to it just blows my mind.) What an opportunity; I am so excited for her!

Since a second edition of my book won’t be coming out until after all the Distant Lands episodes air, I thought it would be best to share my Half Shy interview now. Read on for the fascinating behind the scenes story of how Half Shy and “Monster” came to be..

GunterFan: What is your origin story? How did you get involved in music, and how did the Half Shy project come to be?

Half Shy: I’ve been making music pretty quietly since I was in high school with a keyboard and guitar. I played one or two shows a year after college when I could find a friend or my brother to get up on stage with me, but I don’t really have that performer gene in me naturally. I get too much in my head and forget what the lyrics are to the song I wrote, or what the next chord is. Total brain freeze. So that whole experience is a bit of a mental drain. It’s something I think I’d like to dig into and figure out, but right now I’m really enjoying the time writing.

Even playing a song for my friends I still get pretty nervous. That’s where the name Half Shy comes from. I’ve always been interested in making things that by their nature draw a bit of a spotlight, but at the same time, I am just really quite nervous about the attention.

I recorded my first songs under my old name Hey V Kay in my bedroom and started putting them up online one at a time. When I got enough I thought about packaging it up into an album, but then got really distracted by learning how to fix up motorcycles and going to automotive tech school. When I eventually got back around to it I named the album Gut Wrenching.

After a few years I realized that I didn’t want the day-in-day-out life of a mechanic, I just wanted to know how to fix cars for myself and to have that knowledge in my back pocket. I got back into making music but grew frustrated at the process of writing and recording songs. I felt like I wasn’t able to capture the ideas I had in my head. Like trying to draw on your computer with a mouse. Doable, but it’s not going to come out like you’d hoped.

So these last couple of years I’ve focused more on learning the technical aspect of it, from the initial ideas and lyrics, to the recording and mixing. During that process I put out Bedroom Visionaries, and while writing I happened upon the name Half Shy in an old Thesaurus which felt instantly right. Learning all of that has been fun, I even went as far as to create my own book to solidify a daily writing routine (lyricworkbook.com). All that has been a bit of a tangent from actually making much music though. I should be getting my books in December from the press so I’m really looking forward to getting back into making more music instead of dealing with printing presses, setting up websites, and sourcing ribbon suppliers.

GF: What is the story behind "Monster"? How did the show get in contact with you?

HS: I keep a log of “Song Starters” with neat things I’ve heard in the world, and I would look through it every now and then and notice just how many came from Adventure Time. Eventually I thought well, I have to make a song about this show that just keeps breaking my heart. It was around the time I was nearly done with the first [Adventure Time-inspired] song “In My Element” that I got an email from Bandcamp saying “someone bought your album (Bedroom Visionaries).”

I get maybe one or two of these a month at most so I love to go in and say hi to the person and say thanks, be curious about who they are, [and] what they’re all about. Turns out it was Adam Muto, the executive producer of the show. (I asked and he has no idea how he happened upon my stuff. He guessed that I must have tagged something #adventuretime and he just happened to see it.) So I sent him an email saying, “Hey wow thanks for checking out my tunes. Also... holy crap you’ve made the best show I have ever seen in my life.” [I] played it real cool like. After finishing up writing my second [Adventure Time-inspired] song “Betty” I couldn’t help but fangirl real hard [and I sent him another message saying], “I’m sorry this is probably awkward, but I really love your show and I wrote these songs about it.” He was incredibly kind and shared them with his Twitter Universe, and a while after that I got a random email from him saying basically, “Hey, I’m working on this thing I can’t talk about, would you be interested?” I was like… well you know I’m pretty busy working at a sign shop so I’m gonna have to pass on this once in a lifetime opportunity (J/K. Obviously I fan-girl squealed and said yes immediately).

We chatted a bit about what the project was going to be and the direction. He mentioned there [would be] two Marceline songs in the special, [and he asked if I] would I be interested in giving the love song a try? Trying real hard to suppress my instant imposter syndrome I was like, “Yea, totally I’d be into giving that a shot!” So I read through the story and loved the idea of the dragon mirrored in Marceline, thinking through how they’ve both built up a protective shell, how she grew tough for a reason, but now she can open up and be vulnerable with PB.

From there I wrote the initial demo with the first two verses mostly intact and we went back and forth a few times editing it down into the final version. I recorded the final parts for the show in my little home studio in Seattle.

GS: When you were writing the song, what emotions, thoughts, or ideas were you channeling? Was there any sort of memory of event that you were trying to artistically "catch" or "recreate" with the lyrics or music?

HS: As far as channeling an emotion, generally I’d say just the experience of existing as a human. It can be so hard to open up and be vulnerable. I can remember that feeling even as a young kid—getting really excited about something and having someone completely trash it or look at you like, “Why are you so interested in that? It’s dumb.” [It causes us to grow] a little more weary to share ourselves because we know that hurt and embarrassment. The pain of being misunderstood is something I think a lot of us can relate to. Then having to decide whether to keep sharing those vulnerable parts of yourself or think, “They’re just not going to get it, I’m going to get hurt, so why bother?” and then stop putting yourself out there. You lose a lot with that thick armor though. You might feel protected, but you’re not feeling a whole lot of anything else other than the weight and chafing of it (I had a whole lot of armor-related metaphors that I didn't end up using.).

I struggle with this in songwriting too. I’m not the bolt-of-lightning type. There are pages and pages of cliches, total garbage, bad jokes, and cheesy lines that I have to get through in order to get to something that I am excited to put out there into the world: “Here I did this thing, I know it’s a little (this or that), but I made it... What do you think?” It’s hard to open yourself up to hearing the other end of that question.

I filled about 5 little pocket notebooks just thinking through the story, ideas, and trying to get this song right. I wanted it to feel familiar and honor the past songs of the show ([e.g.,] using the ukulele and referencing a few of the familiar chords from “I’m Just Your Problem”) but also be pretty open and vulnerable and different for [Marceline]. [I wanted to] show that she’s going through some tough emotions but also figuring herself out and growing.

GF: I feel like “Monster” is, at its core, an ode to the “Bubbline” ship. How do you feel about your song being intimately connected to one of the most famous LGBTQ+ relationships in animation? Do you have any general thoughts on Marcy and PB, Bubbline, etc.?

HS: Oh, I’m a total fan girl of Bubbline. The whole story of how Rebecca Sugar and Muto slowly morphed it into this deeper relationship is just great. As a part of the LGBTQ community myself it really means so much to see the representation of characters like yourself portrayed in an intelligent way. Growing up I was too young to fully understand what was going on but I saw Ellen getting cancelled, and [I] heard people around me saying they’d never watch her show again after she came out. That stuff sinks in as a kid and so to have these characters who are not only intelligent, but funny, complex, and unapologetically strong who also happen to be queer is really great. I love that the story here isn’t about their orientation, but that they’re people struggling with how to be open and vulnerable in a relationship.

It feels like something sci-fi and animated shows do so well—to show that ridiculousness of limiting who a person should and shouldn’t love. Marceline is a 1000+ year old half-demon/vampire and PB was born from the Mothergum of an apocalyptic radioactive world, but you’re going to get hung up on them loving each other? It sort of brings it into perspective in a really interesting way.

GF: Do you have any other thoughts about the experience that you'd like to share?

HS: Just how lucky, thankful, and honored I feel to be a part of my favorite show, writing a song for one of my favorite characters. It’s also incredibly cool how the people on the show are so willing to connect and collaborate with their fandom. Everyone [on the production crew] was very open and a real joy to work with.

I’d like to give a huge “Thank you!” to Half Shy for agreeing to participate in this interview; she really was quite amiable! If you’d like to hear more of her music, check out her website and her Bandcamp. You can also follow her on Instragram here and on Twitter here. And of course, here is Half Shy’s awesome video of “Monster”.

[kaepopsicle]

nct mbti types redo!

the old one can be found here! but i definitely recommend this one more tehe!

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hi hi! so i know most of you know about mbti or myers briggs personality, if you don’t well. . here’s a little summary! if you already do know go ahead and scroll down past the keep reading to find ncts types! now for those that don’t and want to know it’s basically when you take this quiz and you get four/five letters, each giving you a detailed description of your personality! it helps you find other people with the same personality and people you are compatible or not compatible with! of course it is all just for fun! but i know some people take it seriously! do whatever feels right to you! so moving on to the different letters; there are 4 different letters you can get! which leads to about 16 different outcomes! (there are also 2 extra letters! A & T which are basically the outlook on yourself! but not that many people actually go by those!)

- first there’s E & I (extrovert & introvert) this is basically what your energy level is. E- you get energized by people and are more social. I- you get drained by people and are more homebodies.

- second there’s N & S (intuitive & sensing) this is basically how you understand or learn about other people! N- you base off of your gut feeling or instincts when you first meet someone! more observant! S- you are more logical, analytical, you get to know people a little first before you decide!

- third there’s F & T (feeling & thinking) this is basically what it says! how do you respond to problems! F- you think with your heart! more empathetic and emotional! T- you think with your head! more logical and emotionally intelligent!

- fourth and last one there’s P & J (perceiving & judging) and this is basically on how you prefer to live your everyday life! P- more spontaneous go with the flow! you don’t like schedules very much and tend to go with your gut on things! J- more neat, more punctual! you like routine and for things to go as planned!

also! you can be a mix of these! (for example i am an enfp/infp! so am an mix of extroverted & introverted!) you can pick one that resonates with you most or if they both do go by both!

well that should be all of it! if you want to take the quiz then you can find it right here! now that you know a little bit about what it is! let’s get into what ncts types are! i split them up between the two biggest differences which are introverts vs extroverts! :))

— introverts

confirmed types: infj . isfj . isfp . infp

other introverted types: intj . istj . istp . intp

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- infj

members that are confirmed infjs:

ten . jungwoo . mark . hendery . winwin . half jisung

members i also think are infjs:

no one else

common traits include: creative . empathetic . friendly . intelligent . private . overthinkers . artistic!

most compatible with: enfp!!!! . infp . enfj . other infj

our most popular type! (which is great bc it’s my natural partner ;)) infjs or also know as the advocates are highly artistic and creative people! they appear at first to be very quiet and sensitive! but when actually they’re quite intelligent and are observant, peaceful, friendly people!

“With their strong sense of intuition and emotional understanding, INFJs can be soft-spoken and empathetic. This does not mean that they are push-over's, however. They have deeply held beliefs and an ability to act decisively in order to get what they want. While they are introverted by nature, people with this personality type are able to form strong, meaningful connections with other people. They enjoy helping others, but they also need time and space to recharge. While this personality type may be characterized by idealism, this does not mean that INFJs see the world through rose-colored glasses. They understand the world, both the good and the bad, and hope to be able to make it better.”

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- isfj

members that are confirmed isfjs:

doyoung . jaemin

members i think that are also isfjs:

yuta . half johnny

‎

common traits include: protective . compassionate . sees the good in others . sensitives with others emotions . warm hearted

most compatible with: esfp!!!! . estp . istj . & other isfj

this type is one of my personal favorites! the defenders! they are the type of people who will have you walk on the inner side of the sidewalk! they may seem a little cold at first but once they trust and open up to you they are so warm! and loyal! very puppy like!

“They typically want to work hard, get along with others, and make sure they do what is expected of them. ISFJs value relationships highly and strive to cooperate and maintain harmony with others. They want stability and longevity in their relationships, and tend to maintain a deep devotion to family. They feel most connected with people they know they can rely upon over the long term. ISFJs appreciate tradition and like knowing how things were done in the past. They are loyal to established methods and values, and want to observe the proper, accepted way of doing things. They place great importance on fitting in with established institutions and contributing what they can to maintain strong, stable social structures. In groups, they often take on the role of historian, ensuring that new members respect and value the established customs.”

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- isfp

members that are confirmed isfps:

taeil . jeno

members i think that are also isfps:

shotaro

common traits include: independent . imaginative . creative . passionate

most compatible with: esfj!!!! . esfp . isfj . other isfp

the next type is the adventurers! they are curious and passionate people that are very drawn to the outside world and helping others! they are gentle and sweet :)

“ISFPs are gentle caretakers who live in the present moment and enjoy their surroundings with cheerful, low-key enthusiasm. They are flexible and spontaneous, and like to go with the flow to enjoy what life has to offer. ISFPs are quiet and unassuming, and may be hard to get to know. However, to those who know them well, the ISFP is warm and friendly, eager to share in life's many experiences. ISFPs have a strong aesthetic sense and seek out beauty in their surroundings. They are attuned to sensory experience, and often have a natural talent for the arts. ISFPs especially excel at manipulating objects, and may wield creative tools like paintbrushes and sculptor's knives with great mastery.”

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- infp

members that are confirmed infps:

chenle . half jisung

members i think that are also infps:

taeyong

common traits include: peaceful . idealistic . open minded . seek harmony

most compatible with: enfj!!!! . enfp . infj . other infp

the next type are the mediators! i love this type (not only bc im half this type) but bc this type is really the most pure and deserves the entire world. they are curious and flexible people!

“Mediator personalities are true idealists, always looking for the hint of good in even the worst of people and events, searching for ways to make things better. While they may be perceived as calm, reserved, or even shy, Mediators have an inner flame and passion that can truly shine. Comprising just 4% of the population, the risk of feeling misunderstood is unfortunately high for the Mediator personality type – but when they find like-minded people to spend their time with, the harmony they feel will be a fountain of joy and inspiration.”

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- istp

members who are confirmed istps:

none of them

members who i think are istps:

renjun

common traits include: practical . creative . rational . spontaneous

most compatible with: entp!!!! . estj . intp . other istp

these are the virtuosos! this type are relaxed! very down to the grown, they are the type of people you want to have during an crisis, they are good at calling the shots and keeping everyone calm!

“Virtuosos love to explore with their hands and their eyes, touching and examining the world around them with cool rationalism and spirited curiosity. People with this personality type are natural Makers, moving from project to project, building the useful and the superfluous for the fun of it, and learning from their environment as they go. Often mechanics and engineers, Virtuosos find no greater joy than in getting their hands dirty pulling things apart and putting them back together, just a little bit better than they were before.”

— extroverts

confirmed types: enfp . esfj . esfp . estp

other extroverted types: entp . enfj . estj . entj

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- enfp

members who are confirmed enfps:

xiaojun . haechan

members who i think are also enfps:

no one else

common traits: energetic . fun . kind . very popular & friendly

most compatible with: infj!!!! . infp . enfj . other enfp

these are the campaigners! (my other personality type) these types are the kind of people you want to be friends with, they keep the energy happy and fun, but also know how to listen and relax

“Campaigners will bring an energy that oftentimes thrusts them into the spotlight, held up by their peers as a leader and a guru – but this isn’t always where independence-loving Campaigners want to be. Worse still if they find themselves beset by the administrative tasks and routine maintenance that can accompany a leadership position. Campaigners’ self-esteem is dependent on their ability to come up with original solutions, and they need to know that they have the freedom to be innovative – they can quickly lose patience or become dejected if they get trapped in a boring role.”

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- esfp

members that are confirmed esfp:

half jaehyun

members who i think are also esfp:

lucas

common traits include: bold . aesthetic . confident . inclusive

most compatible with: isfp!!!! . isfj . esfj . other esfp

this type are known as the entertainers! the whole world is their stage! these people are not only eye catching and well entertaining, they are sweet and have good sportsmanship!

“Entertainers love the spotlight, and all the world’s a stage. Many famous people with the Entertainer personality type are indeed actors, but they love putting on a show for their friends too, chatting with a unique and earthy wit, soaking up attention and making every outing feel a bit like a party. Utterly social, Entertainers enjoy the simplest things, and there’s no greater joy for them than just having fun with a good group of friends. Though it may not always seem like it, Entertainers know that it’s not all about them – they are observant, and very sensitive to others’ emotions. People with this personality type are often the first to help someone talk out a challenging problem, happily providing emotional support and practical advice.”

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‎

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- esfj

members that are confirmed esfj:

kun

members who i think are also esfj:

half johnny

common traits include: supportive . encouraging . caring . positive

most compatible with: isfj!!!! . isfp . esfp . other esfj

this next type are called the consuls! known for their very parent like demeanors, these are what you call your “mom/dad friends” the ones that will give you the best advice and always be a shoulder to lay on and always cheer you on at your worst!

“People who share the Consul personality type are, for lack of a better word, popular – which makes sense, given that it is also a very common personality type, making up twelve percent of the population. In high school, Consuls are the cheerleaders and the quarterbacks, setting the tone, taking the spotlight and leading their teams forward to victory and fame. Later in life, Consuls continue to enjoy supporting their friends and loved ones, organizing social gatherings and doing their best to make sure everyone is happy.”

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- estp

members that are confirmed estp:

half jaehyun . sungchan

members who i think are also estp:

no one else

common traits include: social . perceptive . original . direct

most compatible with: intp!!!! . istp . entp . other estp

these are the entrepreneurs! the people that know what they want in life and will and have the stamina to do so, they are natural born leaders and enjoy calling the shots! and expressing their big ideas!

“Entrepreneurs always have an impact on their immediate surroundings – the best way to spot them at a party is to look for the whirling eddy of people flitting about them as they move from group to group. Laughing and entertaining with a blunt and earthy humor, Entrepreneur personalities love to be the center of attention. If an audience member is asked to come on stage, Entrepreneurs volunteer – or volunteer a shy friend.”

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- entp

members that are confirmed entp:

none

members who i think are entp:

yangyang

common traits include: quick thinkers . knowledgeable . charismatic . energetic

most compatible with: isfp!!!! . intp . esfj . other entps

the last type we will be talking about are known as the debaters! this type are the kind that could go for hours discussing important topics to them! they are quick witted, and are good at coming up with things on their feet. intelligent and resourceful, these types make excellent lawyers

“No one loves the process of mental sparring more than the Debater personality type, as it gives them a chance to exercise their effortlessly quick wit, broad accumulated knowledge base, and capacity for connecting disparate ideas to prove their points. Debaters are the ultimate devil’s advocate, thriving on the process of shredding arguments and beliefs and letting the ribbons drift in the wind for all to see. They don’t always do this because they are trying to achieve some deeper purpose or strategic goal, though. Sometimes it’s for the simple reason that it’s fun.”

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- wowowowubsy, this was a really long post! thanks for making it to the end! what do you think about their types and do you have any other ideas what types the remaining mystery members are? thank you so much for reading! :)

- my thoughts are that there is not a single introverted thinker on this whole team! (renjun i have hope in you!)

- and the fact there are only 1.5 confirmed thinkers in an group of 23- how do they manage ???

- sorry sungchan & jae

- they really are a bunch of introverted feelers goodness gracious

- also literally my pictures ran out half way through it and it won’t let me delete them lmao so sorry about that

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[fatedfuturist]

𝑪𝑯𝑨𝑹𝑨𝑪𝑻𝑬𝑹 𝑻𝑹𝑼𝑻𝑯𝑺.

bold –   always  ⁄  often   ( throughout his history ) italic   –   sometimes  ( throughout his history )

001.   smoking:  the  action  or  habit  of  inhaling  &  exhaling  the  smoke  of  tobacco  or  a  drug.

𝐬𝐦𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐧𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐝𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬.  found it as a means of stress relief and to ‘fit in’ and ‘be cool.’  has since stopped, though when under extreme stress, he may be seen resorting to sporting a cigarette ;  the occasion is rare and practically non-existent, though not impossible.

002.   binge drinking:  the  consumption  of  an  excessive  amount  of  alcohol  in  a  short  period  of  time.

𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐬, 𝐚𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐡𝐨𝐥 𝐚𝐛𝐮𝐬𝐞.  had his first drink at five, a child under pressure by his own father.  years later, he would begin to suffer under the grips of alcohol for decades, the addiction debilitating as a means of a crutch.  consumed excessive amounts when stressed, depressed, or for the sake of the party.  has since learned to loosen up and even go sober, though he has relapsed quite a few times in the process.

003.   drug abuse:  the  habitual  taking  of  illegal  drugs.

𝐲𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧, 𝐚 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐧𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐝𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬.  primarily throughout his time during MIT and after the death of his parents.  it was a crutch.  he let go of drugs easier than he did alcohol.

004.   nail-biting:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  anxiety / tension. 005.  lip-biting:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  anxiety / tension. 006.   night owl: a  person  who  is  habitually  active  or  wakeful  at  night.

𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐧𝐢𝐚 𝐢𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝.  he can’t sleep most nights, not unless he’s exhausted himself physically, or is coaxed to head on up to bed by his significant other.

007.   early bird:  a  person  who  rises ,  arrives ,  or  acts  before  the  usual  or  expected  time. 008.   negative attitudes: a  philosophy  of  approaching  life  with  criticism  &  pessimism.

𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐜𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐠𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐟 𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐲.  typically pessimistic in regards to his own life, rather than the general universe or others.  the signs of a man who have been worn down by the world and has been carrying the weight of said world on his shoulders for too long.

009.   positive attitudes:  a  philosophy  of  approaching  life  with  optimism  &  confidence.

𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞.  he is, by every sense of he word, a futurist.  he builds and he looks toward the future as something bigger and better than the current time.  will optimistically look toward saving as many people as possible before feeling the burden of pessimism chime in.

010.  swearing:  the  use  of  offensive  language. 011.   superstitious:  an  irrational  belief  that  an  object ,  action ,  or  circumstance  not  logically  related  to  a  course  of  events  influences  its  outcome. 012.   inspecting fingernails:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  boredom. 013.  scratching your neck:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  uncertainty. 014.   foot  & finger  tapping:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  stress / impatience. 015.   nose touch:  a  subtle  body  language  sign  of  deceit. 016.   flipping  hair:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  craving  attention. 017.   twirling  hair:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  flirtation. 018.   cracking  knuckles:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  readiness. 019.   hands behind back:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  confidence. 020.   finger-pointing:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  authority. 021.   hands on hips:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  readiness. 022.  hands in pockets:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  mistrust  /  reluctance. 023.  frequent touch:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  warmth / familiarity.

𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐩𝐞𝐨��𝐥𝐞 𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭.  those that do not know him or are strangers, however, are less of the receiving end of touch.  touch is a matter of trust for tony, and he doesn’t trust easily.

024.   throat  –  clearing:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  rejection / doubt. 025.   jaw  –  clenching:  a  common  body  language  sign  of  hostility. 026.   eye  –  rolling: a  common  body  language  sign  of  irritation. 027.  head  –  tilt: a  common  body  language  sign  of  interest. 028.   whistling: to  emit  high  –  pitched  sound  by  forcing  breakthrough  a  small  hole  between  one’s  lips  or  teeth;  usually  to  a  tune. 029.   humming:  make  a  low,  steady  continuous  sound  like  that  of  a  bee;  usually  to  a  tune. 030.   perfectionism:  refusal  to  accept  any  standard  short  of  perfection. 031.   photographic memory:  the  ability  to  remember  information  or  visual  images  in  great  detail. 032.   paranoia:  a  mental  condition  characterized  by  delusions  of  persecution,  unwarranted  jealousy,  or  exaggerated  self - importance,  typically  worked  into  an  organized  system.  

𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐮𝐦𝐚.  from the abuse of his father during his childhood and youth to the betrayal of people he believed would never turn their hand on him, and the death and rebirth of the universe at his hands, he has become increasingly paranoid of what comes next.

033.   exaggeration:  a  statement  that  represents  something  as  better  or  worse  than  it  really  is.

𝐡𝐞’𝐬 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐜.  has a tendency to speak loud and with hyperboles when he feels the need to be melodramatic.

034.   intuitive:  using  or  based  on  what  one  feels  to  be  true  even  without  conscious  reasoning;  instinctive. 035.  quick-witted:  showing  or  characterized  by  an  ability  to  think  or  respond  quickly  &  effectively.   036.   interrupting:  breaking  the  continuity  of  a  conversation  with  one’s  own  statements.

𝐮𝐧𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭, 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲.  having shown symptoms of ADHD, his train of thought jumps from one cart to another, connecting thoughts in a disjointed manner, and interrupting his own original train of thought to begin with. 

037.   doodling:  to  scribble  or  make  rough  drawings,  absentmindedly. 038.   irritable:  having  or  showing  a  tendency  to  be  easily  annoyed. 039.   gambling:  to  play  games  of  chance  for  money;  bet.

𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐚 𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐢𝐱𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐤, he enjoyed gambling as it was fun and unpredictable.  he had the money to spend.  he still does, but he finds that gambling is just as bad of an addiction as anything else.  now, he sticks to playful bets and challenges that do not have much danger associated to them.

040.   travel – sick:  suffering  from  nausea  caused  by  the  motion  of  a  moving  vehicle ,  boat ,  or  aircraft. 041.   sensitive:  having  or  displaying  a  quick  &  delicate  appreciation  of  others’  feelings.

𝐞𝐱𝐡𝐢𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐞𝐱𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐦𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐲.  having experienced many painful and traumatic events in his lifetime, he finds it easy to relate and both sympathize and empathize with others’ and their feelings.

042.  melancholy:  a  feeling  of  pensive  sadness,  typically  with  no  obvious  cause.

𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐰𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐮𝐩 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐜 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐠𝐢𝐜.  not for any particular reason.  often has depressive episodes and occasional mood swings that drive him toward this category of feeling sadness and emptiness.

043.   chewing gum:  the  exercise  of  chewing  flavored  gum  which  is  not  intended  for  swallowing. 044.   fidgeting:  to  make  small  movements,  especially  of  the  hands  &  feet,  through  nervousness  or  impatience.

𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐡𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐧; it is not non-existent.  tony has had a lifetime of experience in front of cameras and lights where he finds himself usually as the most uncomfortable.  although he copes and performs well under the spotlight, small nervous ticks such as fidgeting in certain scenarios will still shine through when enough attention is paid on his body language.

045.  skeptical:  not  easily  convinced;  having  doubts  or  reservations. 046.   neat–freak:  compulsively  obsessed  with  cleanliness. 047.   gossiping:  divulging  personal  information  about  others. 048.   prim:  feeling  or  showing  disapproval  of  anything  regarded  as  improper;  stiffly  correct. 049.   abbreviating:  giving  others  nicknames / shortening  names / giving  pet  names.

𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐚𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐲, he finds creative monikers for others’, or shortens peoples’ names where he sees fit.  some are of good taste, some are cheesy.

050.   having a catchphrase: having  a  sentence  or  phrase  typically  associated  with  a  specific  person.

“ 𝐢 𝐚𝐦 𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐧. ”

tagged by :  @fallencomrade​ a while ago bc i lose track as u tag me in so many good things SDHKJFSDJFDJ tagging :   @stormweathered  /  @shlded   @thawedpatriot  @genotypiic  @sensesdialed​

[erraticfairy]

Podcast: The Power of Storytelling – What Is ‘This Is My Brave?’



Jennifer Marshall is a mom, executive director, storyteller, and a woman living with bipolar disorder. In 2011, she started chronicling her challenges of living with mental illness while raising two young children. 

Her story was a powerful one and connected with people all over the country, many of whom wrote to her to say that they had been inspired after reading her blog.  Jennifer knew she was onto something, and that storytelling was a powerful tool for healing. 

This was the beginning of ‘This Is My Brave’ – a nonprofit with the mission of bringing stories of mental illness and addiction out of the shadows and into the spotlight. 

Listen now to learn how this powerful stage show has transformed the lives of people in cities across America.   

SUBSCRIBE & REVIEW

  Guest information for ‘This is My Brave’ Podcast Episode

Jennifer Marshall is the Co-Founder and Executive Director of This Is My Brave, a mental health storytelling nonprofit organization. Since its inception in 2014, This Is My Brave has hosted 59 unique productions featuring more than 750 individuals telling their true stories of overcoming mental illness and addiction through creative expression. Jenn lives with type 1 bipolar disorder and suffered from a postpartum psychosis episode and an antenatal psychosis episode during the years she was having her children, now 8 and 10. Her award-winning blog – BipolarMomLife.com – which she launched in 2011, became an inspiration to many and was the path that led her to create a platform for others to also share their stories. In her spare time, she loves reading, hot yoga, and spending time at the beach.

  Computer Generated Transcript for ‘This is My Brave’ Episode

Editor’s Note: Please be mindful that this transcript has been computer generated and therefore may contain inaccuracies and grammar errors. Thank you.

Announcer: Welcome to the Psych Central Podcast, where each episode features guest experts discussing psychology and mental health in every day plain language. Here’s your host, Gabe Howard.

Gabe Howard: Hello everyone and welcome to this week’s episode of the Psych Central Podcast. Today I will be talking to Jennifer Marshall who is a mom who lives with bipolar disorder and is the co-founder and executive director of a very cool nonprofit called “This Is My Brave.” Jennifer welcome to the show.

Jennifer Marshall: Thanks, Gabe. It’s good to be with you today.

Gabe Howard: Well we are very very very glad that you’re here. The first question that I want to ask you is, you sort of rose to prominence by being kind of a mommy blogger who talked about living with bipolar disorder, is that correct?

Jennifer Marshall: Yeah I started blogging when my kids were about 1 and 3 because I had gone through a struggle of coming to terms with my illness and learning how to manage it and also raise kids. So I had gone through four hospitalizations. By that point when my kids were 1 and 3 and I needed to find stories from other people I was looking for stories online of other people who had gone through similar issues. And when I found them they inspired me to also share my story. So I thought I can help another person by putting my story out there. I wanted to do that.

Gabe Howard: One of the things that I’ve always really respected about you Jennifer is that you do talk about being a mom who lives with bipolar disorder and so often because of the stigma and the discrimination. People who have kids you know they kind of don’t want to put it out there because they’re afraid of what will happen to their children and as you pointed out that means it sort of isolates you. Was that a concern for you when you got started?

Jennifer Marshall: You know, Gabe, when I first started writing I wanted to write openly with my real name. But I talked to my husband and he was supportive. But my mom and dad were just nervous. You know they were worried that I’d be judged and discriminated upon if I ever decided to go back to work. Because at that point in my life I had taken time off from work and I was being a stay at home mom. And so they were thinking about my future and they didn’t know what that would look like if I were to open up. And so when I first started my blog I wrote anonymously and it wasn’t until I made the decision to open up with my real name that I realized what a difference it made not only for me. I finally felt like I could be myself. I finally felt like I could talk about every aspect of my life publicly if I wanted to. Not just the nice things that were happening in my life the good things I could talk about the struggles I’d gone through and when I shared my first blog post with my real name I had parents coming up to me even at my kids preschool saying like oh my gosh. So your story. Thank you for sharing. That’s just so courageous of you and so brave and. But before I did that I mean my mom that was one of her concerns. She said, “Jen, what is this? Parents of the other kids at preschool don’t want their kids to play with your kids because they know you have bipolar disorder.” I mean my whole thing back then was mom I wouldn’t want to associate with them and if they’re that close minded I want to educate them by putting my story out there like people who live with bipolar disorder are just regular people and they can live great lives when they work on their treatment and they do what they need to do to stay healthy. And that was what I saw then, when I when I opened up all these parents were just grateful to talk about it. And you know my kids back then were so little that they didn’t really understand what I was doing. But as they grew and they started to see my work and they would come to our events and we’d talk about it and I tried to talk about it with them at their level so that they’d be able to grasp it as they got older. And now I mean you should hear the way they talk about mental illness and my condition and you know they talk about it just like it’s any physical condition. And that’s what I think needs to happen.

Gabe Howard: I can really relate to that. It’s sort of one of the things that happened in my family you know when I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Nobody in my family knew anything about bipolar disorder. I was diagnosed and then we’re all learning so there really is this like demarcation in our lives you know before Gabe’s bipolar and after Gabe’s bipolar even in the way that we talk about mental health mental illness everything but my nieces and nephews. They came along after you know Uncle Gabe was diagnosed so they just grew up with this. They grew up with learning about it and the way that they handle it and discuss it is so much different. And it gives me so much hope for the future.

Jennifer Marshall: Yeah I think it’s a generational thing too. You know I think we talk about this really often in the mental health circles but like older generations were just they didn’t know a lot about it. And so the more we know I think the more it gets rid of that fear. And we can start to get rid of that discrimination. The more we talk about it.

Gabe Howard: How did you feel about your parents. I don’t want to say raining on your parade but kind of raining on your parade. You know you were excited to advocate and get out there and connect people and they were like Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa slow down. Did that cause any tension.

Jennifer Marshall: So that was in 2011 when I started writing and they encouraged me to stay anonymous. It felt like they were ashamed and I felt shameful about it. Like OK well so I can’t talk about it. And we have to hide this. But yet I was proud of how I was living my life and how I was managing the condition and also juggling two small kids and so that was difficult. It didn’t hurt our relationship. I mean I just tried to get them to understand. And it took time for them. Eventually then when I did open up it was the spring of 2013. So about a year and a half later I knew that they still weren’t at that place. They still weren’t with me on being ready to be open but I just took the jump. Like I got my husband’s blessing and he’s always been so supportive and I was I was asked to write for a major web site. And I said I’m done hiding. I’m proud of my life and I’m going to talk about it. And my parents I know they’re going to come around eventually. A couple weeks after I first opened up there was a lot of tension. But eventually they started to understand. And when I say coming full circle I mean my mom eventually then you know when I launched the nonprofit and then it began to grow and grow. She eventually kind of came on board as a producer. One of our events. So it was neat to see that shift. And I mean they’ve always been supportive of me and my journey but like to see them be so publicly vocal about it now is really inspiring to me.

Announcer: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.com. Secure, convenient, and affordable online counseling. Our counselors are licensed, accredited professionals. Anything you share is confidential. Schedule secure video or phone sessions, plus chat and text with your therapist whenever you feel it’s needed. A month of online therapy often costs less than a single traditional face to face session. Go to BetterHelp.com/PsychCentral and experience seven days of free therapy to see if online counseling is right for you. BetterHelp.com/PsychCentral.

Gabe Howard: It’s an excellent testament to what it means to sort of put yourself out there and get people on board and change minds. I know that we would love to live in a world where this is no big deal where it wasn’t considered brave or it wasn’t considered anything and I know that we’re working on that. But I do love the stories of people who aren’t on board that don’t understand that change their mind because it shows that it’s possible. It really shows that people who are entrenched in this belief that mental illness is shameful or stigmatizing and they don’t even know why but they believe it can see a different path and see a different way and change. Jennifer one of the things that you said is that you love stories that you started a non-profit. Can you tell us about This Is My Brave?

Jennifer Marshall: Yeah I’d love to. So This Is My Brave started after I realized the outpouring of support. When I opened up with my story online all of these people were thanking me and I said you know when they thanked me I noticed the same thing happened every time they would thank me for sharing my story and they would tell me their story about being affected by mental illness whether it was themselves living with a mental illness or someone they loved. And so I thought to myself there’s something to this. Like this the storytelling and it was within a matter of six months I met a woman who became my co-founder and I told her I have this idea but I need help to launch it. And she said her family had been touched significantly by mental illness and she said you know what. You’re right. I want to do something I want to join you and try to change that. Because she’d be in the grocery store and someone would say “How’s your son doing?” Because he had been going through a struggle. And but they said it in whispers and shouldn’t be like you know we should be able to talk about this like any other condition that people go through. And so she joined me and we launched the concept which was the theater show where we could celebrate stories of recovery so people telling their story creatively through poetry and original music and essay and we launched the idea on Kickstarter which is a crowdfunding website. So you put your idea out there and tell people how much money you need to make it happen and they contribute and they get benefits. So they would donate 20 bucks to get a ticket to the show. Six months later when it’s all said and done. So we put the idea out there within 31 days. We had raised over ten thousand dollars to fund the very first show and it was a big success. It was at that point we were with the end of 2013 and then we had six months to put the show together and we put the call out for storytellers and we met 13 people who were so talented and we got everyone together we did a couple rehearsals and then we did the show and we sold out of nearly 400 seat theater got covered in the local news a couple different stations, a magazine and then the end result was more people were saying we want this in our community. So the following year we expanded and went to more cities six cities and then we went to nine cities and then 15 17. I just grew from there. Each year.

Gabe Howard: That’s incredible. And the name. This Is My Brave. Can you tell us where that name came from?

Jennifer Marshall: Yeah so right around the time when I decided to open up publicly with my story it was right around the same time the Sara Bareilles song “Brave” had hit the radio and I just was so in love with the song. The lyrics meant a lot to me. She was saying like why don’t you tell people the truth. You know and being silent is not helping you anymore. You know why don’t you tell people the truth. And so I had tweeted to her and said with the link to my first blog post opening up publicly and I said, “Sara, I’m in love with your new song. This is how big my brave is.” And I have the link and I use whatever hashtag she was using for the new song and she retweeted me. And I just felt validated I felt like someone understood and the lyrics I guess had meant a lot. And the word brave meant a lot because people. That’s what people were saying to me when I opened up. They’re like You’re so brave and so I needed to incorporate, I knew I wanted to incorporate, that in the name of a non-profit I just didn’t know how and I was kind of brainstorming with a friend and she said, “Why don’t you call it ‘This Is My Brave?'” And I said it’s so perfect. And now when we do our shows and people are telling their story at the end a lot of them say you know my name is Jen and this is my brave and it really is powerful.

Gabe Howard: That’s great. And you know we didn’t know each other back in 2013 when that song was out and so many people sent it to me. I’m not a big music fan, ut people were emailing me links on YouTube to that song and just like Gabe somebody wrote a song about you and I’m like Wha? And you’re right. I listened to it and the lyric is I’d imagine if you just let the words out and I was like Well I do let the words out and I was like I know you always say like think of how people would understand mental illness if all of the people who were living well were able to talk about it to sort of balance out those crisis things and. It is a very inspiring song and the fact that you got retweeted is just incredible.

Jennifer Marshall: Yeah she’s an awesome artist and she continues to do amazing things and we’re just grateful we request the license to play the song at every one of our shows to kick it off and it sets the tone for the show. It’s really cool.

Gabe Howard: So every single This Is My Brave across the country plays that song before it gets started?

Jennifer Marshall: Yeah. Yeah.

Gabe Howard: So take us through that. So you sort of give licenses or franchise agreements to it to various people all across the country to put on. This Is My Brave, you know like This Is My Brave Columbus or L.A. or San Francisco. And they sort of follow your model to put it on and kind of take us through what that looks like.

Jennifer Marshall: Yeah well we produce shows two ways either a volunteer comes forward and says I love your show. I want to do it in my community I want to help organize it. And we interview them and if they’re a good fit we set them up to produce a show for us. So they work as like an extension of our staff. They’re volunteer or we work with other non-profits to want to use our show as a fundraising model. And that’s when they would pay a licensing fee to us and they get all of our support. You know the six months it takes to put the show together but then all the money that’s raised at the show most of it goes to them we take a small percentage but so. But each way is the same thing. We start at the beginning and we put a call out for storytellers and we say we’re looking for people who want to tell their story creatively about overcoming mental illness and or addiction as well and we hold a weekend of auditions and we call them auditions because we have to know that someone is invested in the process they have to create a five minute piece that tells their story which it doesn’t tell their whole life story but it tells a slice of what they’ve gone through and it shows us not only the struggle but the recovery and how they’ve been able to get through it.

Jennifer Marshall: So we hold auditions and then then they the producer in that city cast the show with about 12 to 14 people and then those folks are taken through a series of rehearsals where they get together and they bond and they meet each other and share their stories and they really kind of finalize their piece. Sometimes they have little tweaks along the way but by the final rehearsal they’re ready to go. And then we do a dress rehearsal which is usually the day of the show or the night before and our team here at This Is My Brave, we go to every show and we’ll do opening remarks and just kind of give the audience some of the history of the organization and why we do what we do and then we’re there for logistics and we live tweet and we live in the story all the shows and and then all the shows are professionally videotaped and then cataloged on our YouTube channel.

Gabe Howard: Is it. Is it hard to pick 12 to 14 people. I know. On one hand I think wow you know 12 to 14 people all telling their stories is incredible. But then I think Oh my God where am I going to find 12 to 14 people who are willing to tell their story? What have you found across the country?

Jennifer Marshall: Yeah it’s funny you say that because when we did our first show in 2014 my co-founder Anne Marie, she said, “Jenn, do you really think we’re gonna get this many people to come forward?” And I just had faith in the process. And when you put that call out you’re surprised. I mean the people you meet are just so talented and smart and funny and they’re just awesome people. And we usually get more people than we can take. And casting is difficult. You know everybody’s story is important. That’s the hardest part of the whole process. But we cast on different things. I mean we can’t have a show that’s 12 stories about depression. You have to show that the scope of mental illness. That’s the goal of our show is to show lots of different conditions and different people’s backgrounds and different mediums and how they’re presenting their story. So we strive for a mix of music and poetry and an essay. We’ve had a couple of dancers in our shows before and a couple of comedians And also then all different mental health conditions so that people can really come to the show and they get educated. I mean sometimes you’ll be in a show you’ll be in the audience at a show and hear a story that you’ve never heard of that particular condition and you learn a lot.

Gabe Howard: And I imagine that you also strive to make sure that you don’t have 12 women or 12 men or

Jennifer Marshall: Yeah.

Gabe Howard: You know gender race condition age. I mean that way you get like a real broad section of society.

Jennifer Marshall: We do we strive for that. It’s been challenging. I will say we’ve I mean been doing this for five and a half years now and we see many more women coming forward than men and that I think that comes down to the societal stereotype that men can’t be weak or men can’t show their emotions or else they’re weak you know which is not true. Everybody has emotions everybody you know feels things and men should be able to express that the same as women. And so we do we strive for equality in our shows. It’s tricky because we have to go with the people who come forward. And so we’ve had maybe a handful of shows that were all women but men. Men are coming forward more often. It’s just something that I think we still need to work on.

Gabe Howard: I completely agree I am. I’m surprised at the number of times people tell me they’re like Oh you’re so brave and I’m like well I just want to tell my story about living with bipolar disorder and they say no no no I mean because you’re a man and I’m like Whoa wait what? But you are right there. There are a lot more women in this space and it kind of shows me that for as tough as men claim to be we’re kind of scared we’re afraid to do this we’re afraid to step up it and that’s the challenge that I always put out to men. I’m like listen if we’re supposed to be so tough and we’re supposed to be so brave. Why is telling the honest truth about your life. The thing that keeps you on your butt. But yeah men are often not in touch with their emotions and we hide things that we shouldn’t. And I think it’s dangerous not only to young boys who look up to us but you know young girls who are watching how men behave as well. So I really would like to see this change and I do believe that it is because men and women get mental illness. Equally

Jennifer Marshall: Yes.

Gabe Howard: You can ignore it all you want but it’s not ignoring you. Jennifer, it is always awesome to hang out with you. Where can we find just Jennifer Marshall online? Where’s your blog?

Jennifer Marshall: So I wish we had more time to blog these days. But my old content of my blog is a at new site, JenniferMarshall.me.  That’s M E, and my Twitter handle reflects my old blog name. It’s @bipolarmomlife.

Gabe Howard: And where can we find This Is My Brave so that people can find out if it’s coming to a town near them? Learn about the audition process and also the YouTube channel?

Jennifer Marshall: Yes. We’re really easy to find online. The Web site is ThisIsMyBrave.org. And on YouTube we’re just YouTube.com/ThisIsMyBrave.

Gabe Howard: And you said that all of the past shows have been archived. They’re all on there you can watch them and they’ve been professionally videotaped as well. So none of that none of that shakiness and get a headache five minutes in. These are quality videos that people can watch for absolutely free right.

Jennifer Marshall: Exactly. All the full shows are online and we’d love for people to check them out and share them and re tweet and yeah get the word out. If anyone has an interest out there in possibly producing this is my brave show in their community. They can go to our website and scroll all the way down to the bottom and there’s a Contact Us form just fill that out and express your interest and we’ll be in touch to talk with them about what’s involved.

Gabe Howard: Wonderful. Jennifer thank you so much for being here we really really appreciate it. And to our listeners you really need to head over to YouTube.com/ThisIsMyBrave. There’s lots of great stuff to see over there. And I guarantee that you will find it pretty much every mental illness and stories told in the most clever and unique and interesting ways. So thank you. And again, Jennifer, thank you so much.

Jennifer Marshall: Thank you, Gabe.

Gabe Howard: Remember you don’t have to be brave to share the Psych Central Podcast on social media. Give us a five star review. Use your words; make us famous. We should not be the best kept secret in podcasting any longer. And remember you can get one week of free, convenient, affordable, private online counselling anytime anywhere simply by visiting BetterHelp.com/PsychCentral. We will see everybody next week.

Announcer: You’ve been listening to the Psych Central Podcast. Previous episodes can be found at PsychCentral.com/Show or on your favorite podcast player. To learn more about our host, Gabe Howard, please visit his website at GabeHoward.com. PsychCentral.com is the internet’s oldest and largest independent mental health website run by mental health professionals. Overseen by Dr. John Grohol, PsychCentral.com offers trusted resources and quizzes to help answer your questions about mental health, personality, psychotherapy, and more. Please visit us today at PsychCentral.com. If you have feedback about the show, please email show@PsychCentral.com. Thank you for listening and please share widely.

About The Psych Central  Podcast Host

Gabe Howard is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar and anxiety disorders. He is also one of the co-hosts of the popular show, A Bipolar, a Schizophrenic, and a Podcast. As a speaker, he travels nationally and is available to make your event stand out. To work with Gabe, please visit his website, gabehoward.com.

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[fashiontrendin-blog]

Team Man Repeller Recalls Their Most Confusing Fashion Moments

http://fashion-trendin.com/team-man-repeller-recalls-their-most-confusing-fashion-moments/

Team Man Repeller Recalls Their Most Confusing Fashion Moments

A few years ago, I found myself sitting at an airport bar with my team from my old agency job. We were trapped at Newark International after a long meeting day and, after a few glasses of really bad, expensive Malbec paired with really good, expensive nachos, the subject of old hairstyles came up. We swapped tales of adolescent bowl cuts and curls gone wrong, bad teenage dye-jobs and weird center parts that haunt us still. Our creative director piped up to say that he didn’t regret any of his hairstyles or looks in general; instead, he intentionally leaned into whatever the extreme style of the day was so that he could look back in a few years and chuckle at himself. He then proceeded to share a photo of himself in a Color Me Badd-style suit with a knowing grin on his face.

As I get older, that approach makes more sense to me. We use old music to evoke a certain time in our lives, why not clothes? As it gets harder to keep track of where I was in my life when I did that one thing, remembering that I wore too-short bootcut jeans (freshman year of high school) or a spaghetti strap tank top over a regular tank top (freshman year of undergrad) helps me place myself on the timeline of my life.

In the spirit of that perspective, and in honor of Blackout Month, I asked members of the Man Repeller team to share the outfits or looks from their pasts that they’ve intentionally blacked out (get it?) to give them a new chance in the spotlight. What I got was more than just a quick note about fit or colors, but an evocation of a certain time, an outfit that reminded them of how they felt when they wore it. Give it a read and then share your blacked out fashion moment in the comments.

Amelia Diamond, Head of Creative 

I definitely have worse outfit photos from my youth, teens and young adulthood, but I remember them all. Very, very, very low-rise jeans hang in my memory right alongside the arm warmers I wore in my mall-“punk” phase and my “going out” outfits of college. What I always seem to blackout, however, are my fashion choices from around third through fifth grade, when I was somewhere in the middle of WANTING to develop a personal style but still very much needing my mom to supplement the clothes.

I forgot about this outfit in particular until my dad sent it. The photo was taken for school picture day. It makes me cringe because I kind of remember being this age. I think I wanted to be cute but was getting too old to be cute, if that makes sense? I believe the hat was my mom’s influence, and I kind of remember thinking that watch was very, very cool.

Starling Irving, Social Media Associate 

My parents never once told me what I could or couldn’t wear throughout my life, which was both a blessing and a curse. I spent most of my life dressed like the photo you see here.

My favorite brand was Little Miss Matched, which sold sets of three mismatched socks, and my method of dressing was to cram as many colors into one outfit as possible and then add go-go boots, an extravagant hair bow and a retainer. Earlier, I went through a hat phase where I wore argyle fedoras and knitted golf caps every single day. They were accompanied by knee-length sweat pants.

Of all my cringeworthy fashion trends, the worst was my Juicy phase only because it was the only trend I bought into because the popular girls in middle school thought it was cool. I took pride in dressing for myself even when I knew my outfits would be a source of mocking, but my brief stint in the world of pink velour was the one time period where I was dressing for other people. Major mistake.

Haley, Deputy Editor 

This was truly a difficult decision, as almost everything I wore from birth through college could qualify as embarrassing, but this photo of me wearing a fedora and a going-out top sticks out. I may be making a jokey pose — but I think that’s only because I’m wearing sunglasses at night and not because of the fedora, which I have to assume I was wearing in earnest, as there are other photos of me smiling with my roommates while wearing it. I believe this photo was taken in 2008, when I was 18, which is not long enough ago at all. I probably bought all of this at Forever 21 with my computer technician paycheck. I can’t for the life of me remember why I thought the hat was a good idea. I’m choosing to be compassionate to my former self though; my myriad fashion faux pas were never for a lack of trying. I really wanted to be cool and fashionable and special!

Imani, Editorial Assistant

This is my second grade school picture. Whenever I look at it, all I can see is a miniature Whoopi Goldberg. During this period of my life, my style was firmly situated in the business casual zone; I typically wore corduroy blazers adorned with broaches, argyle and striped sweater vests, sensible brown and black loafers. You get the picture. I dressed like a young professional and I don’t remember it being my mother’s doing (she started allowing me to pick out my own clothes when I was five). I can’t say for sure why I was drawn to such sophisticated pieces, but perhaps it was due to my newfound determination to become a fashion designer by adulthood.

Nora (me!), Managing Editor

I spent my freshman year of high school trying on a few “cool” identities. An Abercrombie shirt one day, a Baby Phat one the other. Eventually I landed on what I thought was “thrift store cool.” I knew that shopping at thrift stores was fun and neat and what all the stylish girls in the costume shop did, so I decided it was for me! I somehow missed the memo to look for interesting things or fun dresses and just bought a bunch of old sport t-shirts I thought were ironic because they had names of far off suburbs on them. This Glen Ellyn soccer was one of my favorites, but after a women yelled “I”m from Glen Ellyn too” at me one day, I decided it was time to retire my rec league looks.

Harling Ross, Fashion Editor

This photo was taken with a self-timer in 2013, when I fancied myself a burgeoning fashion blogger. As laughable as I find the outfit now (why the hamburger am I wearing wool evening gloves with low-slung boyfriend jeans?????), I DO feel a fondness for this particular period in my life, when I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with myself after graduating but I knew I loved the act of getting dressed and unpacking the words and feelings that floated into my head every time I did. It’s what lead me to where I am now! But rest assured, that fondness is coupled with a healthy dose of cringe at the strange variety of stylized irony that was so popular at the time in fashion — one I fully bought into, clearly. For a real treat, zoom in on my left hand and bear witness to the fact that yes, I did, in fact, stack gold rings over the aforementioned wool evening gloves, which I remember thinking was extremely clever at the time.

Leandra Medine, Founder

Nora, I agree with your former creative director. I haven’t necessarily blocked out any fashion memories (not even the summer I wore padded bras and ribbed tank tops with low slung Abercrombie skirts and my midriff showing) and still stand by them because I have almost always used clothes to define myself through various stages of my identity evolving. Why would I want to intentionally forget the obscenity of those years, I ask you? I wouldn’t be here without them!

Now, I’d have presented a photo of said ribbed tank top but I don’t have access to albums outside of Facebook, so this picture from 2012 will have to do. I am pretty sure it was taken a couple of weeks before my wedding while walking down Broadway in Soho and mostly I have chosen it because it could have technically been taken like, last week, and no one would have questioned that. This infuriates me because I assure you my relationship with metallic wedged footwear is over (for the moment), and I hate a chiffon panel more than most things (excluding a high low dress, which this is, by the way). For now.

I guess the difference between the style and therefore identity of your early and late twenties is as simple as modifications that the unassuming eye can’t see, but as grand as the implication of a nuance. This outfit, by all accounts, is still on trend, but the neckline, the fabric, the colors, the sunglasses with the shoes…it’s all wrong. I am much more exacting in my selections now. If I’m turning this into a metaphor for my personality, what I’m saying is that in your early twenties, you dance around the person you’re going to become, but don’t quite know who she is yet. In your late twenties, it starts to crystallize, still isn’t exactly clear yet, but feels a hell of a lot more in tune with your truth/integrity.