#I just said ‘yep!’ and moved on 😂
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a-concert-just-for-me · 3 months ago
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Y’all I cannot make this up. The two therapists I was with today ignored me ALL DAY…Except for when one of them joked in front of two other people that I must have been “so hungry” because I ate my grilled chicken leg “down to the bone.”
Huh??? That’s how you eat it??? If you’re gonna tease a fat girl, at least make it make sense??? That was so weak 😭
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the-offside-rule · 5 months ago
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Patricio O'Ward (Arrow McLaren) - Taste Of Home
Requested: yes
Prompt: Y/n is the youngest Leclerc and is missing home so Pato brings home to her
Warnings: tooth rotting fluff
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Y/n sighed as she leaned back on the couch in the house she now shared with her boyfriend, Pato. It had been an exciting move, leaving behind her life in Monaco to support Pato in his IndyCar career, but tonight, the homesickness gnawed at her more than usual. The city was bustling, yet felt so different from the cozy streets of Monte Carlo, and she missed the warmth of home, the chatter of her brothers, and the comfort of her mother’s cooking. Pato turned his attention away from the TV as he heard his girlfriend moving beside him, noticing the way she was staring blankly at her laptop, her mind far away.
“You okay, mi amor?” Pato asked, his hand strokingher knee. His dark eyes were full of concern. “Yeah, I’m fine." Y/n smiled softly, though her tone betrayed her. "Just missing home tonight, I guess." Pato shifted, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her close. "What do you miss most? Besides Charles making fun of you?" Y/n chuckled at that, leaning her head on Pato's shoulder. “Everything, really. Charles, Lorenzo, Arthur. My mom's carbonara, and just being surrounded by family. It was weird being the youngest sometimes, but they always made me feel you know, like I belonged.” Pato's soft smile turned to a flat line, thinking of what he could do.
“Tell me a story,” Pato suggested, wanting to cheer her up. “About you and your brothers.” She thought for a moment, her face softening as memories surfaced. “Okay, I’ve got one. So, when I was about seven, Charles and Arthur thought it’d be funny to teach me how to ride a bike. But they didn’t tell me how to brake properly." Pato laughed. "That sounds like a disaster waiting to happen."
“Oh, it was." Y/n nodded with a smile. "I rode straight into our neighbor’s garden and crashed into her rose bushes. I was crying, covered in thorns, and instead of comforting me, Charles was laughing so hard he was practically rolling on the floor. Arthur was trying to hide so he wouldn’t get in trouble. But Lorenzo, being the responsible big brother, came and pulled me out of the bushes, all while giving Charles and Arthur a lecture.” Pato shook his head with a grin. “So Charles was always a troublemaker?”
“Always.” Y/n confirmed with a fond laugh. “But he had his moments where he was sweet too. He’s protective, you know? When I went to my first school dance, he grilled the poor boy who asked me to be his date. Charles practically had the poor guy sweating.” Pato laughed louder this time. "Yeah, that sounds like him. Protective older brother mode.” Y/n had loosened up a bit, reminiscing on the past she had in Monaco. “Yep. And Arthur’s no better. Honestly, they all think I need constant watching.” Y/n yawned softly, her tiredness creeping in after a long day at university. “I miss them, though.”
“I know you do.” Pato said, kissing her temple softly. "You should get some rest. It's been a long day, amor." Y/n looked at the time on her laptop. "Yeah, I think I will.” Y/n stood up, stretching. “I’ll head to bed. I’ve got an early class tomorrow.” Pato smiled as she leaned down and placed a delicate kiss onto his lips. “Goodnight, mi amor. I love you.”
“Love you too, Pato.” Y/n smiled before turning and heading for the stairs. As soon as the door closed, Pato pulled out his phone, an idea sparking in his mind. He scrolled through his contacts until he found Charles’ number and sent a message.
Pato Hey man, quick question. Y/n’s feeling really homesick tonight and I was thinking… can you send me your family’s carbonara recipe? I want to surprise her tomorrow.
Pato stared at his phone, unsure if Charles would respond quickly. But within moments, his screen lit up with a reply.
Charles Hey, mate. Of course, I’ll send it over. You trying to impress my sister with your cooking? 😂
Pato Haha, yeah, something like that. She told me she misses your mom’s carbonara, so I thought it might help.
Charles Give me a second, I’ll write it down for you.
A minute later, Charles sent over a series of detailed instructions, with a few extra tips for making sure the dish turned out just right. Pato read through the messages carefully, determined to get it perfect.
Charles And don’t overcook the pasta! I swear, if you serve it mushy, Y/n will never let you live it down.
Pato Haha, I’ll do my best. Thanks, man.
With the recipe in hand, Pato felt a surge of excitement. He could picture Y/n’s face lighting up when she came home to find a taste of Monaco waiting for her.
The next day, after Y/n left for her morning classes, Pato got to work. He drove to the store, carefully selecting only the best ingredients for the pasta dish. He came home, cleaned up a bit and set to work cooking. No one said it would be easy and it certainly wasn't for such a simple dish. He followed Charles’ recipe to the letter, carefully whisking the eggs and cheese together, cooking the pancetta until it was crisp, and boiling the pasta to al dente perfection. His kitchen was soon filled with the comforting smell of home-cooked food, and he couldn’t help but feel proud of himself for pulling it off. Pato had managed to spill sowm egg here and there, a bit of sliced guanciale on the floor (nothing Norbi couldn't help with), but he got there. He had done it. He had to admit, he ate a bowl or two whilst waiting for Y/n to get back.
Just as he was plating the carbonara, he heard the front door open. Y/n walked in, looking exhausted but surprised when she caught the scent wafting through the apartment. “Oh that smells delicious! Pato, what are you cooking?” She asked, setting her bag down. Pato turned to her with a grin, holding up two plates of the golden, creamy pasta. “Surprise! I made your family’s carbonara.” Her eyes widened, and her heart melted instantly. “You what?”
“I called Charles and got the recipe,” Pato explained, walking over to hand her a plate. “I know you’ve been homesick, and I wanted to bring a little bit of home here for you.” Y/n stared at him, her eyes soft with emotion. “Pato this is amazing. You didn’t have to do all this.” She smiled, her hand caressing his cheek. “I wanted to,” Pato said, his voice gentle. “You mean the world to me, Y/n. I want you to feel at home, even here.” She smiled, her eyes glistening with unshed tears, and took a bite. “This is perfect,” she said, her voice thick with emotion. “It tastes just like home.” Pato sat down beside her, watching as she ate with a soft smile. “I’m glad you like it.” Y/n leaned over and kissed his cheek. “I love it. And I love you.”
“I love you too,” Pato whispered, feeling a wave of warmth and contentment wash over him. He’d brought a piece of Monaco to Miami, and in that moment, it felt like home; because Y/n was with him.
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sturniluvr · 8 months ago
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Under the sea
Matt Sturniolo x fem!reader
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word count: 3k
warnings: little swearing, possible spelling mistakes nothing other than that. LMK if I missed anything
summary: Matt Y/N Nick and Chris go on a beach trip together and Matt and Y/N go in the water together, which leads to a long awaited love confession.
requested?: yes/no
A/N: I know nothing about breathing underwater so don’t quote me on the whole ‘Matt breathing through his nose’ I have no clue okay😭😂lemme know if any of you wanna be added to my Sturniolo triplets taglist or general taglist 🫶🏻enjoy!🤍
❗️semi proof read❗️
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Y/N woke up to her phone ringing, she looked at the caller ID ‘Nick🍯’ she quickly picked it up and she saw her best friend’s face illuminated her phone 
“Hey babes, fancy a beach trip today?” Nick spoke as he moved around the house grabbing miscellaneous items seemingly packing a bag. She nodded immediately, never turning a trip to the beach. 
“Sure, what time? Who’s going?” The Y/H/C girl asked, Nick finished packing the bag before responding. 
“We’re leaving around 10, and we’re gonna grab some food from a cafe near the beach, it’s just me you Matt and Chris” she nods and gets out of her bed, opening her blinds and dropping her phone on the bed as she packed a bag, Nick still on FaceTime, all of a sudden, she heard Chris’ loud voice yelling down the phone to her.  
“HI Y/N! GOOD MORNING” she chuckled at her other best friend. 
“Hi Chris, how’d you sleep kid?” She asked as Chris stole nick’s phone to speak to the younger girl. 
“I slept well, what about you?” He panned the camera to Matt who was just coming out of his room completely forgetting about the question he had just asked her. 
“Aww look it’s your boyfriend Y/N/N” Chris smirks jokingly, knowing about her crush on his triplet and Matt’s reciprocated crush on her. 
Matt blushes at what Chris said and sends Y/N a wave and a smile. 
“Shut up Chris! Hi Y/N how are you?” He asked smiling, making his way into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water and Chris following him with the phone. She nods before responding. 
“I’m good thanks Matt, how are you? Ooo! Can one of you make a coffee and bring it when you come to pick me up? You know you guys love me” She asks grinning knowing she wouldn’t have time to make a coffee herself. Matt chuckles grabbing out her travel cup she leaves at their house, immediately making a coffee for her after grabbing some water out the fridge for himself. 
“Of course, sweetheart. Milk and 2 sugars?” Matt asks, causing Y/N to blush slightly at the use of the nickname that rolls off his tongue with ease after calling her it so often as if it was her second name to him. 
“Yep! Thank you, Matthew” Chris suddenly runs away with a grin on his face as Nick chases him for his phone back. 
“Chris! Give me my phone” Chris eventually gives in, passing Nick’s phone back to him. 
“Sooo, what bikini are you planning to dazzle Matt in today you gorgeous woman?” Nick chuckles as he flops on his bed, waiting for the younger triplets to finish getting ready, also knowing of Matt’s crush on his best friend and her crush on Matt. She chuckles before replying. 
“It’s between these two. 1 or 2 which one do you think he’d like?” She asks the first one being a white floral bikini and the second being a pale blue bikini with some little bows on.  
“The second one DEFINITELY it’ll bring out your eyes really well, you’ll look stunning!” Nick grins, knowing it’s secretly Matt’s favourite bikini of hers having seen her in it before and Matt had a little problem in his swim shorts after seeing her in it for the first time. Nick chuckles to himself remembering having to help Matt somehow cover the tent in his shorts. 
She nods and turns her camera off to quickly put the bikini on. After putting it on, she threw a floral sundress over the top just until they got to the beach. As soon as she turned her phone camera back on, she immediately heard Nick shout.  
“Fit check girl! Show meeeee” she chuckles at him before propping her phone up and giving him a 360 of her outfit. Nick whistles hyping her up. 
“You look amazing Y/N/N!” he yells. 
He walks out of his bedroom and heads downstairs to where Matt and Chris are, Matt in his bathroom and Chris lounging on the couch on his phone. 
“We’ll be leaving soon by the looks of it, Matt’s just brushing his teeth, he’s made your coffee for you” he holds her coffee mug up to the phone, she smiles and shouts a quick thanks down the phone hoping Matt would hear. 
After Matt’s brushed his teeth and got shoes on, the triplets make their downstairs to the garage and pile into the car, Chris and Nick in the back knowing Y/N will want to sit in the front when they pick her up and Matt in the driver's seat. He starts the engine and they get on their way to pick the younger girl up 
“Right, we’ve just left, we’ll see you soon” Nick says, the boys collectively saying a goodbye to her, she smiles and says bye to her boys before ending the call and doing last minute checks around her apartment like closing windows etc and grabbing her watermelon space camp lip balm off her bedside table and applied the lip balm to her lips before putting it in her bag along with everything else she needs for the beach. 
——————————
She hears a honk outside her apartment complex and on cue she gets a message from Matt.
Matt🐻: hey we’re outside kid x 
Y/N🤍: Okie, on my way down now x 
She makes her way down the stairs and out the doors of her apartment complex lobby, immediately spotting Matt’s black Kia parked outside and the boys inside waiting for her. She notices Nick is in his own world so she sneaks up to his window and bangs on it, scaring the shit out of him making the boys laugh. 
“You bitch I just shit myself” nick laughs as she gets in the passenger seat of the car, buckling her belt up. She looks behind and gives him a sweet grin. 
“Hi to you too Nicolas, hey Chris” she said giving the youngest triplet a quick fist bump. 
“Hello Matthew” she smiles at the driver, he smiles back at her chucking at the use of his full name. She takes her coffee from the cup holder and takes a sip. 
“Hello Y/N” he replies as he drives away from the apartment complex and towards the cafe they planned to go to before the beach. 
Y/N put her phone on the aux cord and played their joint playlist that they all had a few songs each, and they all started singing along to the songs the car full of laughs as they drove. 
The drive flies by and before they know it, they arrive at the cafe, Matt quickly pulls into a parking spot and they get out of the car and head inside and find an empty table in the corner to sit at and they all sit down, Y/N and Matt on one side of the table and Chris and Nick on the other side. 
They each grab a menu from the little stand on the table and look through to see what to eat and drink. Matt looks at Y/N smiling at her concentration face, thinking it was the cutest thing ever. 
“What you gonna order?” He asks the younger girl. 
“I’m thinking of getting just a bacon baguette and maybe a peach ice tea. What about you?” She replies with a small smile on her face which the blue eyed boy quickly returns before answering her question. 
“Probably just an omelette or something and some water or something” he chuckles. 
The waiter comes over and asks for their orders. Once they’ve ordered the waiter heads off into the kitchen and the triplets engage in a conversation about an upcoming YouTube video idea and Y/N scrolls aimlessly through her TikTok for you page. She suddenly hears Chris call her name, she looks up acknowledging her best friends since 4th grade. 
“Hmm? What’s up?” She asks as the boy's chuckle, realising she hadn’t heard them. 
“We were just wondering if you wanted to be in our next video, we’re planning to do a period simulator and we need someone, preferably a woman whose experienced periods, to tell us how accurate it is. Would you be up for it?” Nick asks, looking across from him at the Y/E/C girl, she nods at him. 
“Yeah, when do you plan on filming it?” Y/N asks looking between the 20 year olds. 
“Preferably in the next few days, just let us know when your able to help us.” Chris speaks up, she nods at him. 
“Okay, cool, just let me know when you’re filming it and I can come round and film with you” she agrees with a smile on her face, secretly excited to see Matt Nick and Chris do a period simulator and experience what she goes through monthly. The waiter brings over their drinks, peach ice teas for Y/N and Chris, a glass of water for Matt and a soda for Nick. 
“I’ll be right back with your food guys” the waiter smiles and they all thank him as he walks away to grab their food from the kitchen. 
Not too long after the waiter comes back with the food, laying the plates of food out on the table in front of who ordered what. The group thanked him and dug into their food. 
“Everything good?” Y/N asked the older boys and they all collectively nod as the four continue to eat their food. 
——————————
After finishing their food and paying the bill, the group piled back into Matt’s car and continued the journey to the beach. 
Once they arrived at the beach, Y/N and Nick grab their tote bags and put everything in them that they’ll need throughout the day. Matt looks around for a parking meter. 
“Do you know how much it is?” Y/N asks him, pulling out her purse to get some change out to pay some money towards the parking, Matt gently swatted her hand. 
“No need for that, put your purse away woman. It’s like $5.50 for 3 hours, I got it don’t worry.” He smiles appreciatively at her as he grabs some change and gets out the car heading towards the parking meter. 
“Y/N, turn around” she heard Chris say and she turned around and immediately saw the camera pointing towards her, she lets out a chuckle and a wave. 
“There’s your favourite person everyone” nick chuckles and I smile. 
“Hi everyone, we’re having a nice little beach trip today” I explain to the vlog and Nick and Chris nod in confirmation as Matt comes back to the car and places the parking ticket on the dashboard so it’s visible from the windshield. 
They all get out the car and Matt passes the car keys to Y/N to keep in her bag since he hasn't got a belt loop to hook them onto since he’s wearing swim shorts. 
Once the group get down to the sand and find a spot to set up in, Nick lays the towels out for everyone and Y/N strips of her sundress, revealing her bikini, immediately catching Matt’s attention. 
“Cute bikini Y/N/N!” Nick smirks knowing damn well the reason she had picked out that specific bikini, she smiles at him and thanks him. 
Y/N pulls out her book from her bag and laid down on her towel that was laid out next to Matt’s. While she was focused on her reading, she didn’t notice Matt’s lingering gaze on her, admiring her body in the blue bikini that accentuated her curves perfectly and brought out the colour in her eyes. 
On the other side of Matt, Chris and Nick were building a sandcastle, Nick collecting the sand and Chris was digging a moat to go around he castle. 
Y/N chuckled as she noticed the youngest and oldest triplet playing in the sand and decided to record them for vlog content, Matt smiled and chuckled as he realised what she was doing. 
“Nick and Chris are being children in the sand” Y/N laughs as she filmed them building and digging, she then went back to reading her book. 
——————————
A little while later, she feels a tap on her shoulder, she looks and sees Matt looking at her. 
“Fancy a swim?” He asks with a small smile on his face which she immediately returned with a nod and a smile of her own. Y/N put her book down and placed it back in her bag so it was safe, she put her bag next to Nick’s so he could keep an eye on it for her while she was in the sea with Matt.  
“Last one there’s a rotten egg!” Y/N yells with a big grin on her face, Matt laughs.  
“Oh, you’re on!” The blue eyed boy replied as he and Y/N started racing down to the sea, he had just beat Y/N to it and fist pumps the air in victory, letting out a laugh. 
“Yeah yeah, you won” Y/N chuckles and rolls her eyes playfully as she walks into the water. She takes a moment to admire the clear blue water shining as the sun hit it perfectly. 
“It’s so pretty, isn’t it?” She says looking out at the water. Matt hums in agreement. 
“Yeah, it’s beautiful.” He was looking at her and not the water with a soft smile on his face, loving how care free and happy she looked. 
Y/N starts to walk in further, causing Matt to follow behind her as a natural protective instinct even though she can swim perfectly fine, he wanted to always make sure she was safe. Once the duo was deep enough in the water, Y/N grabs Matt’s hand and pulls him under.  
She chuckles as she waves at him from under the water, he chuckles back and waves back at her. 
An idea then comes to Matt’s mind, he thinks this would be a perfect way of confessing his feelings to her. He grabs her hand and pulls her closer to him. He takes a breath through his nose. He starts mouthing to her, knowing she’s pretty good at lip reading. 
“Y/N there’s something I need to tell you” Matt mouths and waits for a moment for her to respond which she does with a nod, he continues to tell her. 
“I love you” he mouths looking into her Y/E/C orbs. She freezes for a moment before swimming back to the surface, Matt following her. 
“You love me?” She asked a smiling starting to grow on her face. He smiles shyly and nods. 
“I love you too Matt, I have since high school.” Y/N chuckles, he lets out a sigh of relief and smiles widely at her before pulling her into his arms and cups her cheeks and Y/N wraps her arms around his neck. 
“Can I kiss you?” He asks softly and she quickly nodded. He smiled as he leaned in and pressed his lips to hers, she immediately reciprocated the kiss and they both start smiling into the kiss. They pull apart with wide smiles on both of their faces. 
“I can finally tell you how good you look in that bikini, god damn sweetheart, you look amazing!” Matt worships her, his hands moving to grip her hips as he plants another chaste kiss to her lips, she blushed and smiled into the kiss. 
“And I’ll never get tired of that now” Matt grinned as they pulled out of the kiss, causing Y/N to chuckle and nod in agreement. Matt suddenly heads back under water, and softly tugs Y/N’s arm as a signal to follow him which she does. Once they’re both underwater, he looks at her with a smile before mouthing, his arms wrapped back around her waist. 
“Y/N L/N, will you be my girlfriend?” 
She grins at the question and immediately nods her head, Y/N leans in and kisses Matt. After pulling out of the kiss they both head up to the surface. 
Matt wipes the water out of his eyes before opening them. He looks at her and smiles. 
“We should probably head back up to the two children god knows what they’re doing” Matt let’s put a laugh as she intertwines their fingers and leads her to the shore and she leads the way back to where their towels and belongings are, Matt shamelessly staring at her ass with a small smirk as she walks ahead of him. 
when the couple get to where Nick and Chris are, Nick is now half asleep on his towel and Chris is still digging, she smiles at Matt and intertwines their fingers, immediately catching the gaze of Chris and his lips curve into a smile almost immediately.  
“Nick! Nick! Look!” Chris yells shaking Nick awake and points to Y/N and Matt’s intertwined fingers. Nick immediately grins and shoots up to hug his brother and best friend. 
“Ugh finally you guys!” He jokes and Y/N playfully slaps his arm and chuckles. 
“Yeah yeah, how long do we have left on the ticket?” She asks out loud to any of the boys. 
“I think about an hour darling” Matt replies, the pet name rolling easily off his tongue, she smiles and nods and she lays back down on her towel and pulls her book back out, the triplets chuckling at her and Matt lays on his towel next to her, pulling his towel a little closer to hers and she softly rests her head on his shoulder as she reads her book quietly to him. Matt doesn’t think he’s ever felt so content in his life, he’s now dating the love of his life, he’s surrounded by three of his favourite people and Y/N is laying in his arms reading softly to him. 
——————————
An hour later Y/N sits up to get ready to leave and she noticed Nick and Chris had buried themselves in the sand, Matt and Y/N let out a laugh and she takes a picture of the two. After they got out of the sand, they all start packing up their stuff and head back to the car and head home and they get showered and then settle down on the couch to watch a movie, they all ended up falling asleep on the couch. 
Insta post
y/user
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Liked by: matthew.sturniolo, nicolassturniolo, christophersturniolo and others
y/user: beach day with my boys🤍☀️ (Sturniolo triplets vlog coming soon :) )
tagged: matthew.sturniolo, nicolassturniolo, christophersturniolo
comments:
nicolassturniolo: had a great day with all of you🫶🏻
liked by creator❤️
y/user: thanks for the invite bae😘
liked by: nicolassturniolo
nicolassturniolo: damn we all look good❗️
liked by creator❤️
matthew.sturniolo: the best day with the best people❤️
liked by: y/user, nicolassturniolo, christophersturniolo
y/user: my favourite company❤️
liked by: matthew.sturniolo
user: they’re all so fineeee😩🫠
christophersturniolo: best day, now take care of that sun burn you lobster😭😭
liked by: y/user, matthew.sturniolo, nicolassturniolo
y/user: yes father🙄😘
madisonbeer: need to plan a girls day when I’m in LA
Liked by creator❤️
y/user: absolutely babes🤍
user: Matt and Y/N in the towel together🥹🥹they better get together soon
liked by: y/user, matthew.sturniolo
user: THEY LIKED????
user: you two tryna tell us something👀
user: my otp fr
matthew.sturniolo: 👀👀
user: Nick and Chris buried in the sand😭😭
nathandoe8: who knew my boys could play soccer👀
Liked by creator❤️
y/user: *our boys* Nathan, not yours mister😂😭
user: Y/N taking pics of the sunset is so real😌
user: the way I know who’s who in the photo by the sand faces😭
madifilipowicz: prettiest girl🤍(suppose the boys are alright too🙄👀)
Liked by creator❤️
y/user: wish you could’ve joined us babe, had to parent them all on my own today😭😂
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🏷️: @imwetforyourmom @mattscoquette
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nopointic · 26 days ago
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my adventures with being asexual and getting my tubes removed as a 33 year old virgin in a red state in 2025
my gynecologist is so funny and sweet because i'm asexual and he remembers that, but he always brings up birth control and safe sex by habit and i dutifully nod along. and he's like awww yeah you're ASEXUAL now but in the future???? you might wanna??? and i'm like hmmmm maybe???? but better safe than sorry!!! and we smile and laugh but there is an understanding of something bigger. we're not naive. we live in a red state. women's rights and health care are being stripped every fucking day. i am young. i am not married. i am asking for something that doctors usually just turn down immediately.
and then we go on to continue to plan for my surgery for getting my tubes removed and it's so fucking funny to me.
he's like, ok so no babies. no babies!!!!! but maybe one day you might want sex! i dunno. but no babies for sure! and i'm like yep!!!!! he gets me! this was easier coming out the closet to him than my parents. my parents still do not comprehend that i am asexual. to them it's me saying odd phrases and a just a phase. i am 33 and have never dated or even kissed someone. i openly gag dramatically when someone brings up sex on a tv show. i'm like YUCK 🤢. could NOT be me. we all laugh but they still think it's me bullshitting i guess. asexual? what does that even MEAN? they just say ok and move along.
meanwhile the nurses and medical assistants are SO confused on me not being on ANY birth control. because they always ask and i say, nah, i'm not taking any. AND THEY LOOK AT ME IN HORROR. and then i say, i'm ABSTINENT. and one lady was like?????? i said I DO NOT HAVE SEX MA'AM. and she was honest to god still confused????
but my gyno is like, yes, she is ASEXUAL duh, she doesn't have sex. and he smiles and moves along.
the funniest shit!!!!!
but i am forever grateful he's so normal about me being asexual. because even my therapist was like, um it's because of your parents bad marriage and you were abused and you don't know for sure it could be a hormonal problem blah blah blah and i told my gyno and he bless his heart went, ok. that's what YOU choose right? you're FINE with that? and i said yeah. and he said cool. that's YOUR decision and you don't have to do anything you don't want. and we then went on to discuss my medical problems. (i have a shit ton)
but yeah. some people think being asexual is something that needs to be fixed immediately and i'm glad my gyno, this one in a million white guy who reminds me of steve rogers aka captain america, just went ok, cool.
sexuality is fluid. he never says oh you'll change your mind in a condescending way. he doesn't ask me why i don't want sex. he just wants me to be ok with my choices and make sure i don't have a baby if i do not want a baby. because shit happens. sadly that is the plain truth. bad things happen like rape and he's like, you don't want kids ever? i'm gonna make sure that stays true. he is so real for that.
even though i am asexual and i don't have sex.
i lucked up in finding a gyno in a red state that cares so deeply about my body and my decisions. i wish everyone had that.
anyways shout out to my gyno going you're asexual?! and then always smiling and saying, yes, you're asexual but NO KIDS RIGHT! 😂😂😂😂😂😂 nah, no kids. team no kids for life. thank you!
oh and virginity is a social construct ya know.
not wanting sex is not the end of the world.
and i can only imagine what my fellow lesbians go through at the gyno. like. the nurse nearly had a fit when i said i don't use any contraceptives. she really hit me with the SO HOW ARE YOU NOT GETTING PREGNANT HUH?
i don't have sex babes.
oh and yes i've gotten the "but you're pretty" lines too. not sure what the fuck being pretty and rocking cute clothes got to do with me being asexual but go off!
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escha-ashengrotto · 8 months ago
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My Name
Azul Ashengrotto x GN!Reader
Summary: Someone covers your eyes and makes you guess who he is. Of course, you already knew the answer but you still played along, deciding to tease him.
Notes: Suggestive themes in the end. Established relationship. Azul calls you sweetheart.
A/N: Some sprinkles of spice here 😳 Also, Azul is described to be great at cooking for this fic. I made this before his Master Chef event came out but even now, I'm still confused if he is good or bad or simply okay at cooking 😭 Let's just think he's good, okay? ☺️ For the sake of the plot 😂
A repost from my old blog @escha-evenstar. Edited.
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"Ah!" You exclaimed in shock at having your eyes suddenly covered by someone's gloved hands.
"Guess who I am correctly and I shall reward you," he said. "If you guess wrongly," he continued as he moved his head closer to your ear, his voice becoming low as he whispered. "...I'll have to punish you."
You couldn't help but giggle at his actions. You already knew who he was the moment he made contact with you but decided to play along.
"Mmmm.. can I at least ask questions about my mysterious captor? I wouldn't want to be punished for guessing wrongly."
"Three questions. I'll let you ask three. Afterwards, you are to guess my name."
"Only three? That's kind of hard," you said while pouting.
"Then you better ask the right questions, sweetheart." He said huskily, putting emphasis on his endearment for you.
Oh my.
The way it rolled off his tongue made you feel a bit weak on the knees.
"Hmmm. Alright. For my first question, is my captor.. great at cooking?"
Azul smiled. "Yes."
"Hehe. That's interesting," you said amused. "For my second question, is my captor.. someone with a high position in his dorm?"
Of course. I am Housewarden of Octavinelle, after all.
"Yes, I am. Proud to say, in fact."
"Wow! That's really nice. I'm sure you must be an amazing person," you said, still feigning innocence.
For the third question, you decided to tease him a bit. "Last question. Is my captor.. extremely smart and attractive?"
That made Azul pause. Good thing he still has your eyes covered because otherwise you'd have seen the pinkish blush on his face.
Your words kept running in Azul's thoughts.
Smart? Definitely. But attractive? Well..
His past has made him feel insecure about his appearance. Hence, he continuously worked hard to maintain his current figure. You did say you find him to be very attractive, both in human form and in merform. He knows you're genuine with your compliments too. Still, Azul felt shy from hearing such words from you.
Does I say yes? Or maybe I should just invalidate the question?
From the silence you received, it was safe to assume you had Azul flustered. You tried to stifle your laughter. "Hehe. I'll take that as a yes. I mean, even your voice sounds attractive," you said, making him a blush some more. "I think I know who you are now, mysterious captor."
Azul tried to compose himself from your teasing, putting on a confident front once more. "Is that so? Remember, if you guess incorrectly, I'm going to have to punish you."
"Yep. I'm sure!"
"Then what's my name?"
"Someone who's really good at cooking. Someone who's great at school with an important status in his dorm. Someone who's intelligent and very much attractive. You are—"
Azul waited for your response with bated breath.
"Jamil?" You said teasingly, even though you knew he was Azul.
You were expecting a playful reaction from him. Maybe he would pinch your cheeks and pout or maybe he would tickle you at your sides. But there was none. He wasn't moving and something in the air felt different. You then realized you were in trouble. Big trouble.
"No, wait! I'm sorry. I was only kidding. I know it's you Azul!" You pleaded.
No response.
"...Azul?" You called out to him nervously.
A few seconds passed by before you heard a heavy sigh from behind.
"Such a shame. I thought you would have gotten the right answer but it seems my hope was misplaced. You poor and unfortunate soul."
He moved to cover both of your eyes with a single hand instead as the other traveled down to wrap tightly around your waist before he pulled you closer. Your back in direct contact with his chest.
"You're just asking for punishment, aren't you?" He said right next to your ear, his voice dangerously low.
"No! I was just- Aah!" You were cutoff as you felt him plant kisses from your ear down to your exposed neck, making you blush. "Azuuul~" You moaned softly.
"That's my name, sweetheart. If only you said my name."
He started to bite down and suck on your skin, leaving a dark red mark. "I could have given you a nice reward but you just had to give a wrong answer."
He continued his onslaught on your neck, leaving a trail of kisses and love bites. "But don't worry, sweetheart. You won't make that same mistake."
Azul whispered in your ear once more. You could imagine that handsome smirk as you hear the deviousness in his voice.
"I'll make sure the only word you'll be saying afterwards is my name."
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Masterlist here!
If you enjoyed this: likes, comments, and reblogs are much appreciated. Thank you for reading!
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winchesterwild78 · 6 months ago
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A New Sheriff in Town pt 2
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Master List
Characters: Beau Arlen x Reader, Reader’s daughter Lily, other Big Sky characters
Warnings: More fluff, because Beau. 😀
A/N: This was an idea given to me by @cheekygirl2309. Just a short series featuring our favorite green eyes Sheriff. Reader is a single mom and Beau moves into town. Things start to develop and the reader's daughter finds it hard to pull herself away from Beau. 
This does not follow the Big Sky timeline and is not in any way associated with the show. All work is my own, please don’t take it. 
Minors DNI 18+
The next morning you were awake before your alarm, and by alarm you mean Lily. She was an early riser and was usually up by 6am. This morning however, she was sound asleep. You stretched and reached for your phone, surprised to see a text from Beau.
Beau: Good morning. I hope you slept well. If you need any help with Lily today, let me know.
You: Good morning, Sheriff. Yes, I slept well, thank you. Lily is still sleeping, so I have a few minutes of peace. Might be able to drink my coffee hot this morning. 😀
Beau: Ha! I remember those times. Em would wake up right about the time I’d pour myself a cup and it would be ice cold before I could get back to it. Do you work today?
You: Yes, later this morning. I have to enroll Lily in preschool this morning. I can’t believe she’s starting in September.
Beau: Would you like some company? Filling out paperwork is always easier when someone is distracting the little one. 
You bit your lip at the thought of seeing Beau again. Should you take him up on his offer or just have Sarah come help? You sent Sarah a text asking her advice.
You: Hey, so Beau offered to go with me to keep Lily company while I enroll her in school. What should I do?
Sarah: Girl, say yes! That man is a god on two bowed legs. Lily already likes him, you better snag him before someone else does. 😉 😗
You: Girl, stop! He’s just being friendly. 
Sarah: Okay. Whatever you say. Have fun with him and Lily today. If you kiss him let me know how it was. I bet he’s a great kisser with those soft lips. 😂
You: Sarah! Stop it. I’m not kissing anyone. You know what, you’re terrible.
Sarah: But you love me.
You: Yes I do. Talk to you later.
You (to Beau): Hey, yeah some company would be great. Can you come by the house in about an hour?
Beau: Yep, I’ll be there darlin’.
Your heart fluttered and you smiled. You grabbed your change of clothes and jumped in the shower. When you got out you checked on Lily who was still sound asleep. 
You watched your baby girl sleeping for a little bit before going into the kitchen to make a coffee and start cooking breakfast. 
About 45 minutes later there was a knock at your door. You looked through the window and saw Beau standing there. He was in his blue jeans, button down shirt and jean jacket, of course he was wearing his cowboy hat. You bit your lip before you opened the door. 
Opening the door your eyes locked in on the most beautiful green eyes you’d ever seen. Your breath hitched, “Good morning, Beau.” “Good morning, Y/N. You look beautiful today.” A blush filled your cheeks, “Thank you. Please come in. Lily is still sleeping, but I made breakfast. I hope you’re hungry.” 
You showed Beau to the kitchen. “I have coffee, bacon, eggs, home fries, biscuits, and orange juice. Help yourself while I go wake the beast.” You laughed. “Wow, this is incredible, I hope you didn’t go to all this trouble for me.” Beau said as he grabbed a plate. “Oh no, I love cooking and I always make sure I cook Lily’s favorite breakfast when I’m home.” 
Beau smirked, “Lily has good taste.” You laughed, “Yeah, my girl can eat. I’ll be back.” 
You walked out of the kitchen towards Lily’s room. Beau sat at the counter and watched you walk away. He bit his lip and smiled.
Walking into Lily’s room, you sat softly on her bed. “Good morning baby girl. It’s time to get up.” She grumbled, “No. I sleep.” You chuckled, “No, you need to get up. Mommy made you breakfast so we can go see your new school today.” “No, I sleep Mommy.” You laughed, “Okay, well I guess Sheriff Beau and I will eat all the breakfast.” 
Lily’s eyes opened quickly and she sat up, “Daddy!!” She squealed. “No, Lily, we talked about that. He’s not daddy. He’s Beau.” She crossed her arms as she stood up, stomping her little foot, “Daddy!” You sighed as she ran out of the room.
You quickly followed her. When she saw Beau she leaped in his lap and threw her arms around his neck, “Daddy!” You looked at Beau, “I’m so sorry. I keep telling her you’re not her daddy.” He smiled softly, “It’s okay, really.” “Okay Lily, you can sit beside me if you promise to eat all your breakfast and get dressed for your mommy.” Lily’s bright blue eyes sparkled as she nodded enthusiastically at Beau. 
Beau put her in her booster seat and slid her up to the table beside him. You gave her the plate you fixed for her and she happily ate, swinging her legs and giggling. “Daddy go to school with me?” Every time she called Beau ‘daddy’ your heart ached. 
“Lily honey, he’s Beau, not daddy, but yes, he’s going to go with us to your school.” “Yay!” The toddler squealed with excitement. As the three of you were eating your phone rang and you saw it was April. “Hey, April. What’s up?” “Hey, Y/N, we have to keep the diner closed today unexpectedly. The stove went out and we can’t get a replacement until at least tomorrow.” “Oh dang, okay. Thanks for letting me know.” 
When you hung up you looked at Beau, “Looks like the diner is closed today due to an issue with the stove. Lily, mommy gets to spend the day with you. What do you say we go to the park after we go to school?” 
Lily clapped and squealed. “Guess she’s excited,” you laughed. Once she was done you got her down, cleaned her up and took her to get her dressed. The two of you were singing while you got her dressed and talking about going to play at the park. 
Beau was in the kitchen and his heart swelled hearing her and you talking and singing together. He cleaned up the kitchen for you and loaded the dishwasher. By the time the two of you came back, the kitchen was clean. 
“Beau, you didn’t have to do that. You’re my guest, but thank you. It was very sweet of you.” “Yes ma’am I did, my mama taught me to help clean up.” You smiled and gave him a hug. You pulled away quickly, “I’m sorry I don’t know what came over me.” Beau smiled, “It’s fine. I liked it.” 
Lily giggled, “Daddy, up please.” She put her arms up asking Beau to pick her up. “Lily, honey, he’s Beau. Can you say Beau?” “Daddy Beau.” You looked at Beau with an apologetic look, and he chuckled. “Close enough.” 
You grabbed your bag and Lily’s paperwork and the three of you walked to your car. Beau put Lily in her carseat and you climbed in the driver’s seat. When Beau climbed in you looked over at him, “I really do appreciate you going with me. I know Sarah would have gone if I asked her to.” “Yeah, but then I wouldn’t have gotten that amazing breakfast or get to spend more time with Lily. I mean she is quite smitten with me.” He smiled at you. “Yeah, I guess she is.” 
About 15 minutes later you were pulling up at the school. Beau jumped out and helped Lily out of her carseat. He picked her up and carried her. The three of you walked into the school and were greeted by the secretary, Carla. “Well hey there, Y/N and Lily. Oh, who’s this?” She looked at Beau. Before either of you could say anything Lily said, “Daddy Beau.” You and Beau laughed. Carla looked at you confused. You looked at Carla and said, “This is Sheriff Beau Arlen, he’s the new Sheriff. Lily is a little confused, and she’s calling him Daddy Beau.” Carla smiled and nodded understanding. 
“I have all her paperwork filled out. I only have one emergency contact for her, is that okay?” Carla looked at you, “Well, we like to have at least two besides the parents, but we can make do.” Your heart panged when she said ‘parents’. Beau walked up to the counter, “Can I be added as an emergency contact, well if that’s okay with you that is.” You blinked trying to process what he was asking. “Oh, um, are you sure?” “Yes, I’m sure. If there is an emergency I can be here fast. I am the Sheriff afterall, I can speed.” He winked at you.
“Well, yeah, that’s fine. We can add him as another contact.” Carla smiled and took Beau’s information down. You looked over at him and smiled, “Thank you, Beau.” You touched his arm and he placed his hand on yours. “You’re welcome, Y/N. Anything for Lily.”
Beau kept Lily occupied while you finished enrolling her. He played peek-a-boo with her, read her stories, and just had her giggling the whole time. You would occasionally look over and you saw a light in your daughter’s eyes you hadn’t seen in a very long time. 
Beau’s smile lit up his whole face too. His eyes sparkled a beautiful green as he and your daughter played and laughed. Carla was watching and saw you looking at Beau and smiled, “Y/N, honey.” “Oh, yeah, sorry.” You offered her an apologetic smile. “He’s good with her. It’s good to see her laugh.” “Yeah it is, and he is.” 
You finished the paperwork and it was time to go. “Okay Lily, time to go. Tell Ms Carla, bye.” Beau picked Lily up so she could see Carla, “Bye Ms Carwa.” She waved her little hand while the other clung to Beau’s neck. 
Once back in the car you told Beau thank you again. “I’ll take you back to my house so you can get your truck and head to work.” Lily did not like that, “No! Daddy, go to the park.” “No, honey, Beau has to go to work. He can’t go to the park today.” She started to cry and your heart broke. Beau took your hand in his, “Let’s take her to the park, together.” You looked over at him, “What? What about work?” “I’ll call Hoyt and tell her I have to go to the park.” He chuckled. “Is that okay with you, Lily, if I go to the park with you and mommy?” “Yes! Daddy go.” 
You shook your head and Beau chuckled. “I can’t win with either of you, can I?” He looked at you and laughed, “Nope, sorry. Two against one.” Pulling up to the park, you noticed it was pretty empty. You grabbed your bag and Beau grabbed Lily and put her down to walk. She grabbed his hand and the two of them walked to the park hand in hand. 
You settled on a bench near the little kids area of the park and watched Lily and Beau play. Your heart swelled with love and a little sadness too. You were missing Aaron and you felt like Lily was cheated out of the amazing father he was. A few minutes of watching you decide to get up and join them. 
Lily was running around and giggling, hiding and jumping around. You and Beau were laughing watching her. As you took a step down off of the equipment, your foot slipped and you almost fell. Beau caught you. Your breath hitched as his strong arms wrapped around you and you looked in his eyes. He held you for what felt like forever. He leaned in and you leaned forward. Your lips mere inches from each other, your breath mingling with his. “Mommy! I'm hungry.” The sound of your toddler pulling you back to reality. 
Beau helped you up and you cleared your throat. “Okay baby, let’s get you a snack. Mommy brought your snack and water.” 
The three of you sat at the picnic table as you pulled out the sliced apples, and grapes, and the waters you packed. Lily sat on the table eating her snack. You and Beau kept stealing looks at each other. You reached for an apple slice as Beau did and your hands touched. You both pulled away. “I think we should talk, Beau.” “Yeah, I think so too.” “I haven’t dated anyone since I dated Aaron, and I don’t know if I’m ready yet. I love how you are with Lily. I don’t want to rush into anything that could possibly hurt her if it didn’t work out. She’s my priority in everything I do. I think we should take whatever this is between us slowly.”
Beau nodded and took your hand, “I agree. I adore Lily and don’t want to hurt her or you. I will go as slow or as fast as you want.” “Thank you, Beau.” You leaned forward and kissed his cheek. 
*Time Jump 3 Months*
“Lily Ann Y/L/N, get in here and get these shoes on. Beau and Emily will be here any minute.” She stomped her foot and crossed her arms, “No!” You took a deep breath. She’d been extra cranky today. “Lily, honey, please. Beau and Emily are coming to go shopping with us.” Lily stood her ground, you took a deep breath. “Okay, you don’t have to go shopping with Emily, Beau and I. I’ll call Sarah and see if she can watch you. I know Emily was really looking forward to going to the ice cream shop with you after dinner.” 
Lily’s eyes got wide, but she still wouldn’t move. You put your shoes on and heard Beau’s truck. Beau and Emily walked in and saw Lily. You looked at Beau and he chuckled, “Need some help?” “Yes, please.” You gently touched his arm. 
“Hey, Lily bug, are you going to get your shoes on so we can leave?” She kept her arms crossed and wouldn’t budge. She’d gotten like this before, but never with Beau. “Lily, what’s wrong? Why don’t you want to go with us today?” Beau asked in a sweet, gentle voice. Lily looked at Beau and hung her head, “I’m sad, Daddy Beau.” “Why are you sad sweetheart?” “I want you to stay, and Emily.” Beau wrapped her in a hug. Your heart panged with love and sadness. She’d gotten so attached to Beau and Emily. “Well, maybe I can ask mommy if Emily and I can have a sleepover tonight.” Her eyes lit up.
She ran to you, “Mommy, can Daddy Beau and Emily have a sleepover?” “Well, if you get your shoes on, we will talk about it.” She grabbed her shoes and Emily helped her put them on. Beau walked over to you and hugged you. “So, Sheriff, you want to have a sleepover?” “Well, yes ma’am. Of course, for Lily.” “Oh of course.” You smiled. 
Emily took Lily outside and before you and Beau walked outside, you grabbed your stuff and he pulled you into a passionate kiss. The two of you had started dating, but kept it from Lily. You didn’t want to confuse her, so you would steal a kiss when she wasn’t around. Emily knew, but she kept it to herself.
Later that night, you and Beau sat on the porch swing as Emily and Lily played in the yard. He took your hand in his and rubbed circles on the top. “You know, darlin’ I could get used to this. Spending all day with my girls, and then swinging on the porch swing with you while the kids ran around.” You looked at him and smiled, “Me too, Beau.” 
Without thinking, you leaned over and placed a soft kiss on his lips. Lily saw you and came running up. “Mommy kissed Daddy Beau.” Her eyes wide. You bit your lip, “Yes, baby girl I did. When you like someone like I like Beau, you give them a kiss.” She wiggled between you two and climbed on Beau’s lap, “You and mommy get married.” You and Beau looked at each other and chuckled, because she wasn’t asking, she stated it. 
You stood up, “Okay, I think it’s movie time, come on everyone.” Beau carried Lily inside and you and Emily started to put pillows and blankets on the floor. Lily and Emily picked a movie, while you and Beau walked in the kitchen to make the popcorn and grab drinks. “I think she’s okay with us kissing, what do you think, sweetheart?” Beau asked as he wrapped his arms around you. You smiled, “Yeah, I think so too. Sorry she mentioned us getting married. I have no idea where that came from.” Beau turned you around to face him, “Hey, I didn’t mind it. I wouldn’t mind it either. This is easy, we’re easy.” You smiled and your breath hitched.
The two of you kissed and the sound of the microwave beeping pulled you two back to reality. You were falling in love with Beau, but were still scared to say it. The last man you loved, died and left you heartbroken. 
“Mama, Emily and I picked a movie.” Lily came running into the kitchen yelling. “Okay, sweet girl, let’s go watch it.” Beau grabbed the drinks, and you grabbed the popcorn. 
As you started the movie, Lily climbed into Beau’s lap and snuggled. You looked over and smiled. Lily was in his lap and Emily was leaning against his other side. He definitely made an amazing girl dad. 
About an hour into the movie, Lily had fallen asleep in Beau’s lap. You smiled at him as he looked down at the sleeping little girl. You stood up to carry her to bed. Beau helped you. Before you left her room, you stopped at the door and watched her sleep for a few minutes. Beau wrapped his arms around you and kissed your head, “She’s absolutely perfect, like you mother.” “She’s growing too fast. I can’t believe she’s in preschool already. Thank you for being so good with her.” “Of course, I love the little firecracker, and her mama too.” Your head spun towards him, “What?” 
Beau pulled you into the hallway, “I love you, Y/N. I know it’s fast, but I’ve fallen in love with you and that little girl in there.” You threw your arms around him, “Oh, Beau. I love you too.” Tears streamed down your face as you finally revealed your feelings for him. He wiped your tears away and placed a searing kiss on your lips. 
A few hours later, Emily was in bed in the guestroom, and you and Beau were sitting on the couch making out like a couple of teenagers. You were trying to stifle your giggles, because you didn’t want to wake up the girls. Beau loved hearing your laugh and you loved him making you laugh. 
As things started to heat up between you and Beau, you heard Lily cry. You went to her room, she had a nightmare. “No mama, I want daddy Beau. Not you.” You looked at Beau and he chuckled. Beau walked over to her bed and gave her a big hug. He calmed her down, and rubbed her back, singing to her until she fell back to sleep. You stood leaning against the doorframe, watching him as he sang to her and calmed her fears. Your heart swelled. 
As he left her room and the two of you returned to the living room, you pulled him into a deep kiss. “I love you so much, Beau Arlen. You’re so incredible with her.” “I love you too, Y/N Y/L/N.” “Beau, are you ready?” You looked at him with love and lust in your eyes. “I’m ready if you’re ready. I’m not trying to rush you or make you feel like we have to do anything.” You smiled, turned off the tv and straddled his lap. Leaning close to his ear, “I’m ready, Beau.” Beau smirked and lifted you up, carrying you to your bedroom. You giggling the whole way there. 
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navybrat817 · 2 years ago
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What would Stud!Bucky do if Smartie playfully smacked his ass when he was doing the dishes?
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Bahaha. 😂
SMACK
Bucky stood up straight, the dish in his hand forgotten when he heard you giggle. "Did you just smack my ass?"
"Yep!" you declared, playfully hitting the other side. "Gonna play your cheeks like bongos."
He looked over his shoulder to give you a stern stare, but couldn't keep a straight face. "My ass is not an instrument."
"You're right," you said, repeatedly smacking it as if it was. "Doesn't mean I can't play with it."
This is my future wife.
"This is harassment," he joked, making no move to stop you. He liked having your hands on him.
"You hit my ass when I did the dishes yesterday! So what was that?"
"It was encouragement," he smiled. "Like 'good game'."
"...Good game?"
"What? You compared mine to bongos," he argued, turning to smile at you. "But I'll be happy to play your pussy like a guitar."
"Bucky!"
*****
Love and thanks! ❤️
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timebom · 3 months ago
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thoughts while watching episode 2! ☆
summary: necessary amount of love for jinx, unnecessary amount of child hate lmao
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oh my baby girl i love u it's ok don't be sad please
jinx focused episode let's gooo
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me: omg was that a flash of powder?!
*rewinds*
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me: ...who the fuck is that.
me: oh no. oh no. this kid is important enough to make it to the intro, jinx is going to take care of this child isn't she. that sure is... a choice
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oh no the kid is here
ugh for me personally the only thing worse they could have done is make her pregnant or have a baby. i hate storylines like this im so sorry. it's different when the parent-child relationship is like the main focus or the premise of the show/movie (the mandalorian, the last of us, the walking dead game, silco taking care of powder who's the main character), but when a random ass child shows up years late to the party and needs someone to take care of them and the child character has no previous connection to the audience... i really dislike that in stories im so sorry. leave jinx alone
also, in what world is jinx ready to be a mother figure to anyone lmao she's very much stuck in a child-like state herself half the time. this is not what she needs, we both deserve better
i like the child's design though
honestly, i hope arcane makes me take all that i just said back, but we'll see
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jinx i love you
her voice is so good, the voice acting is sooo good oh my god
does she kinda have a different vibe or is it just me?
honestly thought she would be doing a lot worse than she is. good for her!
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don't get me wrong, i get that from the orphan's point of view jinx just saved her life and she's clearly super strong, what else is she supposed to do than follow
what i'm saying is that i personally do not want jinx to take care of a child right now. i want this to be about the sisters. the fact that i don't like this is on me, the writers can obviously do whatever they want with their story buuut.....
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sevika<3
can't wait for her and jinx to team up
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wait does sevika even know that jinx was the one who killed silco?
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i don't know what's going on with viktor and whatever he's saying here is not helping
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did she though?
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everything viktor does now is so slow. the way he speaks, the way he moves...
im not a jayvik girlie but i imagine that those who are felt rly sad after this scene
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ekko my boy! the biker mouse from mars can speak?
my brother: he really does look like one
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i literally facepalmed and my brother groaned
ekko please ditch this creature you're better on your own
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shut up. you're not cute, you're not funny.
i should probably clarify that heimer is my least favourite character in the show, i kinda have no patience for anything he does 😂
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i literally said DO IT JAYCE out loud
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this made me laugh
same, ekko, same.
can we talk about the way he's holding the cup lol
it's also kinda funny and kinda sad at the same time that this is probably his first time tasting tea
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SHUT UUUUPPPP
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i screamed
vi? nooo, what the hell 😫 i thought it was the bad guys after her but no it's VI? don't hurt jinx like this, don't hurt me like this
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the animation is making me feel like i'm the one who can't breathe damn
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hasn't my girl been through enough?? stooooppp
this looked really cool though
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there's no way those were the only two times he saw her cry
also, she's insane, blinking and getting even closer. i am obsessed with her
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YESSSHHHH
after getting her ass kicked by vi and jinx repeatedly in season 1, i have a feeling this is a battle she's finally going to win 😆
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the whole-body movement she did here, so cute, i love her so much 😭
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GET JINXED OMG!!!!!!!! 💙💙💙💙💙
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holy shit you can always trust arcane with fight scenes
my brother: no one does fight scenes better than arcane.
me: i know right?! that was so good! best scene in season 2 so far!
brother: yep.
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oh wow ok. girl, 1st of all, ew. 2nd of all, that thing was like 80% machine what was there left for you to eat? 3rd of all... this begs the question, what do these people eat, exactly? do they draw the line at cannibalism but everyone else is fair game? huh.
i doubt the people in piltover eat like this
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no, let's not do that<3
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what is he, jesus? this is a bit too much.
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its-time-to-write · 1 year ago
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this is 100% self indulgent. no one asked for this except me and I have zero excuse for how it turned out. i have no defense, no witty rebuttal, no nothing. i wrote this because i wanted to, and at the very least i hope this inspires someone to write their borderline-self-insert fic and post it publicly.
this fic is set after season 3. enjoy😂
(oh now might also be a good time to mention how much I love Man City. bc it’s a lot.)
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can’t hear my thoughts (i cannot hear my thoughts)
Calling Lake Como beautiful is like saying space is big. It’s true for sure, but it feels like an understatement. It’s June and the weather is absolutely gorgeous, perfect for the wedding you’re attending. It’s for two good friends of yours, and it’s going to be a party full of football royalty. You’re mostly excited to see friends who are WAGs from other teams who you’ve connected with over the past year and a half.
Oh, and you suppose it will be a nice vacation with Jamie, too.
You’re staying at a beautiful hotel that’s been open since 1910, and you swear you’ll never stay somewhere as beautiful again.
“Getting ideas for the house?” Jamie teases, and it sends a thrill down your spine with the way he refers to his house as your collective home. 
You grin as he spins you around the Suite Greta. Everything is golden, from the drapes to the pillows to the sun catching on his face.
“No,” you reply, “but maybe for a vacation home?”
Jamie laughs as he catches you up in his arms. “I could see us here in the next off-season. Not sure we’d get out much,” he muses and you wrap your arms around him as tight as they can go.
You’re here for a full week but Isaac’s wedding is only one day. You and Jamie have plans to see everyone who’s in town, as well as have some time to yourself.
“Sasha wants to go out for dinner tonight,” you tell Jamie as he unpacks his suitcase.
“Girls only, or will Jack be there?”
“Let’s see,” you hum as you scan the group chat. “Isabel said she and Erling will be there, so looks like it’s a couple’s thing. That’ll be fun, right?” you ask with just a hint of anxiety. Jamie and Jack are friends, they’ve run in the same circles for years, but you’re not sure how he’s going to feel about being outnumbered two to one, City to Richmond, at dinner.
“As long as Rodri ain’t there, I’m fucking chuffed,” he says as he lays out his suit on the bed.
“Chuffed? Is that a thing you say now?” you ask, flat on your back on the bed.
“Yep,” he replies. “I’m posh now, babe. Sorry you Americans can’t do it as well as we Brits.”
“I have it on good authority that we do it very well,” you smirk. “But I don’t think that’s something you’ll get to experience tonight. I haven’t seen Sash or Isa in ages, so we’ll probably talk for a long time and then I’ll be tired when we get back to the room.”
Jamie groans. “You’re sadistic, woman. The shit you put me through.”
You smile and remind him, “You’re the one who picked me, remember?”
Jamie is technically the one who picked you. You had just moved from America to London, got a temp job at a Richmond FC, and the rest is history. You don’t work at Richmond anymore, haven’t for a while, as you’ve been able to start your own thing in between attending matches and events and whatever else Jamie’s invited to. Being Jamie’s girlfriend is a full-time job on its own, and he definitely spoils you beyond what you’re used to. He’s the one who bought your dress for the wedding and it freaked you out just a little bit until you called Sasha (an angel, by the way) who laughed and talked you off the ledge. 
“Comes with the territory, babe. They’re just boys with more money than they know what to do with. Jack’d buy me the moon if he could figure out how. Enjoy it. It’s been a while since anyone’s seen Tartt this happy.”
So you do. You had been living together for almost a year now so you’d think that a dress wouldn’t push you over the edge, but there you go. You’re trying to be calmer about it. It’s better ever since you met Sasha and Isabel. 
You had been stuck in a room while Jamie talked to his old manager, and they had noticed your deer-in-the-headlights expression. You’re right in the middle of the two, age-wise, and from similar enough backgrounds.
“Here’s my number. Come over to my flat tomorrow for brunch. We’ll get you settled, babes,” Sasha had said. You went and it had been amazing to finally make real friends, even if they were technically on the opposing team. 
You’re excited to see them, excited for Isaac to finally get married, and excited to spend a full seven days with Jamie by your side. It’s going to be the best.
You enter the venue arm-in-arm with Jamie, practically dancing across the grass. The sun’s shining and there are all sorts of people you know and love. It feels a little surreal to be here. 
Earlier, back in the room, you had slipped into your dress carefully to avoid getting makeup stains on the front. The skirt fell just at your knees and puffed out ever so slightly, with thick straps instead of regular sleeves so you could fully enjoy the warm weather. 
“Do a spin,” he had said, voice full of glee. You’d acquiesced, twirling around to let the blue tile print billow out before he caught you, kissing your shoulder so as not to ruin your makeup. 
Now, you’re holding onto him and trying not to wrinkle his linen suit when you hear someone shout your name. 
“Sasha!” you screech, running toward her as best you can with your shoes on the grass. You squeeze each other into a tight hug, uncaring about about the state of her hot pink dress. 
“Hey man,” Jack says to Jamie, who grins and shakes his hand. “You’d think they haven’t seen each other in fucking ages.”
“It’s been twelve hours,” you say. “And before that it’s been like two months. Anyway, don’t you two have some football to discuss or something? Or headbands? Or-”
“Really short socks,” Sasha helpfully supplies. 
Jamie shakes his head. “Fuck off, Attwood.”
“Fuck you, Tartt,” she replies. 
“Oi, you two wouldn’t even be friends if it weren’t for me. You could be a little nicer,” Jamie says. 
“Oh is that Hughes?” Jack asks before either Sasha or Jamie can escalate. Their entire friendship is based off sniping one another and neither you nor Jack are particularly in the mood for it today. 
Jamie turns to look. “Oh mint, looks like things are starting. You saved us seats?”
“Yeah, with Haaland and Isabel,” Sasha returns, linking her arm through yours. “C’mon, did you get yourself a parasol?”
It’s the most beautiful wedding you’ve ever been to. Stella looks stunning in her gown, Isaac stoically sobs his eyes out while Colin surreptitiously hands him a tissue. Even Roy seems to be having a good time, but then again Keeley once told you that he “really fucking loves weddings.” You hadn’t believed her, but his lips are in a straight line instead of a frown so maybe she was right. 
There’s a group of City and Richmond players together, and it’s a little strange to see how friendly they are off the pitch. Dani is explaining something with lots of hand gestures to Phil while the rest of the group jokes around. 
Sasha sneaked you and Isabel away to get drinks for yourselves and you were about to get away unnoticed when Erling caught Isabel’s arm and asked for a drink too, so now you’re ordering for your boyfriends as well as yourselves. 
You don’t really care, there’s a part of you that’s reveling in the sheer joy of being young and hot. Sue you. 
“Cosmo, please,” you say while the girls order drinks of their own. Sasha raises an eyebrow so you shrug and say, “Jamie likes what he likes.”
She rolls her eyes and scoffs “Tartt,” but it’s with the affection of an older sister so you elbow her and ask, “What did Jack want?”
She makes a face. “Heineken. He also likes what he fuckin’ likes.” 
You wheeze out a laugh as Isabel comes to join you. She smiles as she sips from something lavender colored in a martini glass. She cuts an elegant figure in her yellow, billowy dress. You smooth your dress and open your mouth to say something when a voice calls your name. You look to see your ex walking up, hand-in-hand with his wife. You know, the one he left you for. 
“Jake,” you say in surprise. God, you need your brain to form coherent thoughts right now. “What are you doing here?”
He grins, far too wide and goofy to be real. Not like Jamie, you think. 
“Oh, you know, Emma’s loosely related to the bride on her dad’s side. She asked for an invite, so here we are. Who are you here for? Bride or groom?”
“Both, actually,” you reply automatically. Jake’s words are grating, not so much in content as they are in tone. He always had a way of saying things condescendingly, like everyone else was a stupid little kid. 
“Oh,” he says in what you think is supposed to be surprise, “that’s funny. I didn’t know you knew anyone out here. You’ve been living in England all alone, right?”
Emma just hovers by Jake’s shoulder. She’s not contributing anything to this conversation except a snooty little smirk. 
“No,” you say. “I’m not alone. This is Isabel, by the way.” You look around for Sasha, but she’s disappeared. Smart girl. 
Isa doesn’t extend her hand. “Nice to meet you,” she says and Jake takes her at her word. He puffs up his chest a little bit as he asks, “Where are you from? You don’t sound British.”
“We’re from Norway,” a voice behind her says. “I’m Erling.”
Sasha has reappeared with Jack, Erling, and Jamie in tow. You mentally congratulate her with a well done, Sash as you feel Jamie’s arm loop around your waist. 
He feels like a solid wall against your back, a glimmer in an otherwise garbage moment. 
Jake takes stock of the three men who are looking at him with less-than friendly stares. You’re not sure what Sasha told them, but you’re absolutely positive Jamie recognizes Jake. You can practically feel the hairs on his arm bristling. 
Jake finishes his assessment and deems it appropriate to talk. “So, how do you all know each other?”
Jamie scoffs and looks away, while Jack stares at Jake like he can’t believe what he’s hearing. 
You wonder what it is with your affinity for J-names. 
“We’re footballers,” Erling says before anyone can take more offense. 
“Premier League footballers,” Jamie adds, as if it means anything to Jake. 
Jake’s American, like you, and he’s never been much for sports anyway. He wouldn’t even recognize David Beckham if the man were standing under a poster of himself. 
Jake says, “Right. Hey, weren’t you on one of those trashy dating shows?” and Jamie stiffens. 
Sasha mutters, “Fuck’s sake,” under her breath as Erling and Isabel take pointed interest in something in the distance.  
“No,” Jamie replies shortly. “The fuck were you talking to my girl?”
Jake looks to you in surprise. “Oh! You two are together? That’s… well, that’s… I guess I just didn’t expect her to be whoring around like that. But hey, move to another country and all morals go out the window, right?”
That’s the thing about Jake. He never speaks as if he’s actually trying to be offensive. He just says what’s on his mind. And you’re a little concerned that what’s on his mind is going to land Jamie (and quite possible Jack) in jail. Neither of them are especially known for backing down from a squabble. “Cut from the same cloth,” Pep was rumored to say. 
“Fuck off, mate,” Jack interjects. “Just fuck off. Everyone here loves her, and you can’t talk about her like that.”
Your ex reevaluates the situation at hand and decides the best thing to do would be to take Emma’s hand and walk away. 
“Strange that his wife does not speak,” Erling remarks. 
You grimace. “You could’ve stopped at ‘strange.’ No idea what I ever saw in him.”
Jamie has a crushing grip on your waist so you wiggle a bit to get him to loosen up. 
“Prick,” he mutters. “How the fuck did he even get here, anyway? He’s in fucking America.”
“His wife’s loosely related to Stella. They asked for an invite,” Isabel volunteers. 
Jamie rolls his eyes. “Oi, if he tries to talk to you again, I’ll grab Roy and we’ll fucking kill him.”
“Yeah, ‘cause McAdoo’s never been above a little violence at a party,” Jack grins. 
You return his smile and say, “Thanks, but I’m pretty sure his mother-in-law would kill you.”
Erling huffs out a laugh. “Never a dull moment in the Premier League, is there?”
Isabel grins and loops her arm through his. “I’m tired of all this,” she says.  “Let’s go dancing. There’s a band and we don’t have to think about anything other than celebrating, yes?”
“God yes,” says Sasha.
Jamie still looks murderous, but you squeeze his hand once and whisper, “I’m fine, babe. It’s fine.”
He looks like he wants to argue, but he lets you pull him along to the dance floor with the group.
— 
There are so many people that you don’t even catch a glimpse of Jake and Emma. You’re not sure what they’re up to, and fairly certain they don’t know anyone else here. You on the other hand, are living your best life as Jamie sings along to “Ain’t No Mountain.” He’s swinging your arms around as he sways in time to the music. You just let him lead you however he wants. The song ends and he presses his lips to your ear so you can hear him over the sheer volume of everyone talking. “D’you want a drink? I can go get you something.”
You nod and mouth my usual, please, so he salutes and begins weaving his way through the crowd. You watch him as long as you can before spinning back around with a smile.
A smile that quickly fades when you realize Emma is right in front of you.
She says, “Cute dress,” and for a moment, you believe she’s being sincere but then she follows it up with, “Did you borrow it from your grandma’s closet? I’ve seen people do that.” 
Right, because grandmas are known for wearing dresses like this. 
“What? No, Jamie got it for me,” you say. 
“Oh cute, is it from Walmart? I think I saw something like it there last week.”
Emma is trying to draw blood. You suppose she’s taking her shot now as opposed to back then because she thinks there’s no one around to call her out. No one who knows her. 
You say, “They don’t have Walmart here,” instead of “It’s Dolce & Gabbana,” because the second phrase would make you sound like a prick. There’s a part of you that wants to be a prick, though, wants to channel that part of Jamie that’s ruthless, vicious and cruel, messing with the opposition before he cuts them down. 
The first time you saw it, it was hard to believe the Jamie on the pitch was the same Jamie who played with your hair while you cooked, or put a sticky note on his fridge titled “Babe,” detailing everything you’d ever said you liked. 
Emma sees she’s not getting to you, so she changes tactics. “Must be hard being here without any friends,” she remarks. “All alone. And you’ve never been especially extraverted. Are those people the only ones here you know?”
God, Jamie, where are you?
You open your mouth to respond but are cut off by someone with a distinctly midwestern twang say, “I heard one of my favorite countrywomen was here.”
You turn to see Ted Lasso grinning at you in a black suit. It’s the same smile you remember, albeit his eyes are a little sharp. You’d bet anything he knows exactly what’s going on between you and Emma. 
“Ted!” you smile as a rush of relief floods your system. You step into his arms for a hug as he says, “Hey, sweetheart. How’ve you been?”
“Oh, you know,” you say. “Kind of great, actually. I wondered if you were going to be here! Have you seen Jamie yet?”
Ted shakes his head. “Y’know, I haven’t. Why don’t we find him together?” He offers you an arm and you take it gratefully, choosing not to spare Emma a glance.
“She seems like a real bucket of laughs,” Ted remarks.
“You have no idea. That’s my ex’s wife.”
Whatever Ted thought you were going to say, he certainly wasn’t prepared for that. He opens and closes his mouth a few times before settling on a short, “Well I’ll be danged.”
You laugh and stand on tiptoes to try to see Jamie. You don’t see him, but you catch a glimpse of an especially tall, blond head.
“This way,” you tell Ted. You brush past Phil who smiles at you, past Colin and Michael, and past someone you’re pretty sure is a Beckham.
You make your way to Erling and Isabel as they dance to the music in their own corner.
You frown. “Have you seen Jamie?” you shout. 
Isabel shakes her head. “He was looking for you,” she calls back.
“Oh,” you say, “Ted, this is Isabel and-”
“Erling Haaland,” Ted says, hand outstretched. “Pleasure to meet you, son. Big fan of the way you play the game.”
You miss Erling’s response, startled by a hand on your shoulder. You turn to see Sam standing behind you.
“Sam!” you exclaim with a grin, “You look so handsome!”
Sam returns your grin and strikes a pose. “I’ve been sent on a very important mission. I am to retrieve you and bring you to Jamie and I am under no circumstances allowed to let a small rat man named Jake speak to you.”
You raise an eyebrow. 
“Jamie’s words, not mine,” Sam clarifies. “Although I must admit, I have seen this rat man. I do not like him very much.”
“You and me both,” you agree. You wave to Isabel and pat Ted on the arm before following Sam.
He leads you away from the crowd of people to a stone path illuminated by small lights. This can’t be right, you think but Sam points down the path and says, “This is where I leave you.”
He turns to leave then changes his mind and spins back around. “It was lovely seeing you today, albeit for a short amount of time. I hope I will be seeing more of you while we are here. It is not often I meet someone who makes Jamie more tolerable.”
He speaks with a touch of humor and it’s just enough to dispel any apprehensions about what’s waiting for you in the dark. 
You say, “Thanks Sam. Love ya,” which he returns before he disappears back to the main party.
You take a breath and head down the steps.
It’s dark, the light barely shining enough for each step, but as you get farther you see a shadowy figure sitting on a bench under a tree. You smile. You can tell exactly who it is by his silhouette.
Jamie stands as you get closer and pulls you into his arms.
“Thought we’d sneak away to make out a bit,” he says. “And maybe to you wouldn’t yell at me in front of all our friends.”
You groan. “What did you do? Please tell me it has nothing to do with Roy. Or Jack. Oh my god, did you two start convincing people you were separated at birth again? Because it’s really only funny one time.”
“Well…” Jamie hedges.
You pinch his back. It’s the only part of him you can reach at the moment. “Jamie Tartt, you’d better tell me what you did right now or so help me you are going to be sleeping on the couch for the rest of our lives.”
“Oi, don’t fucking do that!”
He reaches back to grab your hands and holds them flat on his chest. “We- Roy, Grealish, and me, might have gotten your prick ex kicked out.”
“You what?” you gasp.
Jamie starts speaking in a rush before you can say anything else. “Look, y’know how protective Grealish gets, especially because Sasha fucking loves you, and then Roy heard that your prick ex was here (not the twat ex) and he said it’s easier for him to get in and out of fights on account of him being a fucking manager but then Grealish said that it’s pretty much expected that fights happen so might as well and anyway, no one’s gonna fuckin’ snitch on any of us because (hate to break it to you babe), but you’re, like, everyone’s kid sister. They’d fucking kill for you so it’s possible that we channeled that into threatening to break all of his bones if he ever ended up in the same country as you again.”
You’re processing all of the things Jamie said plus the incredible speed at which he said them, so all you can manage is a single “Okay,” before he’s talking again.
“Ehm, it’s also slightly-fucking-possible that someone did break his foot.”
“What?” you all but shout.
“Coordinated effort between Isa and Haaland,” Jamie says. “Lad’s a fucking wall, don’t know if you’ve noticed.”
“Jesus, Jamie,” you groan. “I don’t know if I should kiss you or pinch you again.”
“You can do both,” he suggests.
You sigh. “I’m going to kiss you. Like, a lot. And I’m not going to worry about getting caught and after we’ve snogged like a pair of kids in high school- sorry, secondary school, then we’re going to eat a bunch more food and dance with our friends. And if you want to get sloshed, I promise I will only take funny videos for myself, and I will not send them to your mum this time.”
Jamie says, “Liar,” as he kisses the tip of your nose.
“Fine,” you concede, “I will most definitely send them to your mum. And Simon. We’re on a group chat.”
“Not even gonna fucking ask,” Jamie says as he threads a hand through your hair so he can get at a better angle to kiss you.
You wake up the next morning (ahem, afternoon) to Jamie’s foot in your face.
“Excuse me, sir,” you say.
He hiccups himself awake. “Yeah?” he rumbles. “What fucking time..?”
“Late, I assume,” you say.
He groans and flips himself around so your heads are on the same side of the bed. He wastes no time in tangling your limbs together.
“Oi, koala boy. Some of us have morning breath.”
“No y’don’t babe,” he mumbles.
You scratch his head and a shudder runs through his body. “I know,” you say, “my breath is perfect. I meant you. I just didn’t want to hurt your feelings.”
“Cruel woman,” he returns before lapsing into silence. The sun slips through the curtains, and you’re sure it’s going to be another gorgeous day
“Jamie,” you begin then stop.
He says, “Yeah, love?” while looking up at you with his gorgeous blue eyes and you take a moment to freeze this image in your head. 
Jamie Tartt, in bed, hair tousled from sleep. Pillowy white duvet, golden freckled skin, warm body pressed to yours.
He kisses your shoulder, rousing you from your thoughts. 
“Jamie,” you say again, “I wanted to say-”
“Don’t,” he interjects. “You’re not fucking allowed to say thank you for the bare fucking minimum.”
“But it’s not,” you reply, opting to skate over the fact that he apparently can read your mind. “Bare minimum is like, making sure I’m not alone with him, not getting your friends together to scare him off and break his foot.”
Jamie’s been kissing your skin wherever he can reach as you speak, so his words are interspersed with pecks. “Technically, the foot was an accident. Ask any one of our witnesses. And besides, they’re your friends too. You’re the one who got ‘em all to like ya despite the fact we’re mortal enemies on the pitch.”
“You’re the one who goes tanning with Jack,” you remind him.
“Lies told by the press,” Jamie grumbles. “This is my natural sexy glow.”
You say, “Okay little British boy,” as Jamie decides that his current position is not enough and he wants to lay on top of you.
He says something but his face is buried in the crook of your neck, so all you can feel is vibrations.
You ask, “Hm?” so he lifts his head.
“What if it were us next year?”
“Tanning or breaking feet?”
“Getting married.”
Jamie goes back to having his mouth on your neck as if the air weren’t just punched from your lungs.
You’re quiet long enough that he lifts his head again to ask, “Is that good quiet or bad quiet?”
“Good!” you hastily confirm. “Good, but, babe- you haven’t even asked me yet.”
He says, “I’m going to,” as if you should have known already. 
“Okay,” you breathe, “can you give me like a little heads up or something so my nails are done?”
“Uh-huh,” he says, “At the end of the week. Been planning it. Ring’s in my bag, even asked Stella if she’d be pissed that it’s the same week she took on the most un-sexy last name in history. She said she don’t give a shit as long as it’s not at her actual wedding. So.”
“I love you,” you tell him. “Not just because of yesterday or right now. I just think you’re great.”
“I am great, babe,” he says like it’s obvious. “Picked you, didn’t I?”
You crack a smile. “Alright, that’s enough out of you. Do you want to get out of bed or go back to sleep?”
“Sleep,” he replies immediately. 
“Thank God,” you groan, “I didn’t want to move. You’re like a weighted blanket.”
“It’s me sexy muscles,” Jamie says. You wiggle under him to get more comfortable.
“Uh huh,” you agree, but the words are hardly out of your mouth before you’re both back to sleep.
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accio-victuuri · 10 months ago
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time to make lemonades again 🍋🍋
inspired by a previous post i made because something similar happened and here we are. i think that the negative take on these similarities is that the other person/brand is “copying” the other. or one is trying to rub off the popularity of xx. which is a common source of conflict between fans, not just xz’s or wyb’s. and since the topic is trending we have more information of these alleged brand traitors who feed the cpf machine. lol.
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this post made by jeanswest with the kadian 10:05 for xz even if their endorser is wyb. tho i went to their weibo and didn’t see this post all when i was trying to confirm. so maybe it was deleted? the next one is hilarious cause they are implying that JW is taking inspiration from xz for their designs like the little prince and tennis. even if the whole line yibo is endorsing have nothing to do with these styles. AHHHH! they are so much better in connecting things that have no relation at all. 😂
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and it’s so embarrassing how confident they are that this is copying. xz does not own TLP or the sport of Tennis. no matter how much they associate those things with him. atleast with cpfs, we can give disclaimers but solos being so sure that there is just no other way that an international brand can come up with these designs — other than them wanting to leech from xz is next level unhinged.
but still thanks for the candy i guess?
next up is, p1 a li-ning cap that has 85 on it. but it’s actually a back to the future themed drop. a film that was released in 1985. tho maybe they are angry cause li-ning is a repeat offender. p2 is opening of li-ning’s store and the lottery includes a chance to win a casio watch which wyb was endorsing at the time.
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for xz’s zwiling endorsement before, one of the things highlighted by the brand is this machine. idk what. but it said something about brewing coffee at 97 and tea at 85. lol and who are associated with those numbers? wyb!!!! hahahahahahaha!!!!
sometimes i wonder who is the real candy lovin cpf.
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moving on….
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p1 is by kaixiaozao brand, they posted about a product that has dandan noodles that will make you think of the ancient times. dandan being something that is nicknamed for wyb, and ancient times pertaining to lwj and wyb. p2 is absurd, they are so angry at mengniu cause they replied to a cpf. yes it was xposted on the supertopic, but the account was asking a genuine question of how to purchase. so they answered. as much as so/os want the loyalty of these brands, their main goal is money. they will follow the money. that means more people buying their products. they didn’t choose xx or xxx out of the goodness of their hearts, their teams do research on who to hire and who can bring in more 💰.
another problematic thing done by mengniu before ⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️
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#strawberrymilkbobocup# I know this question! Strawberry and milk go together. It’s the most amazing combination. Let me tell you secretly, add some oats and the taste will be amazing. Someone: I want a strawberry custard cup, but not strawberry. No custard, just...
bobo cup 👀
and what that someone said. they don’t want the strawberry nor the custard/milk. so what does that leave us? Bobo 🤯🤯🤯
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this post by i don’t know who that said for roborock, there are a lot of consumers, both peter pan and passion fruit. no lies tho. we do contribute to their sales. it has been that way for a very long time. all these talk of cpfs only love xx or xxx is brainless so/o agenda. they just don’t understand the fact that we can support both and we’ve been doing so for years now. they cannot comprehend it, so they twist it into a narrative that fits them.
lastly, p1 is by bubly and on the can has 85. p2 is zhenguoli and on the poster, they used lwj’s famous tagline ( i wanna take someone back… yep, the same one he said in ttxs )
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i’m even seeing one shared the fact that xz allegedly rented a car that has 805 on the license plate. so he must be promoting cp right? 😂😂😂 idk.. maybe it caught his eye because of his boyfriend and didn’t think people will take photos of his car and license plate to speculate on. and their hateful interpretation of what we would say is CPN:
1. The license plate number chosen when renting a car is Wang Yibo’s birthday “805”
2. The name of the shoes worn has Wang Yibo’s abbreviation “Web” ( this refers to gucci re-web )
3. The photo XZ posted on that day ( when he was in Milan and only took photos of his shoes ) imitated Wang Yibo’s photo from last year’s GQ Gala.
Summary: If there is only a single factor, it can be explained as coincidence together, but so many "coincidences" gathered on the same day, it must be "intentional"! XZ has been using this method for the past 5 years … Hype male-male CP in a “both subtle and obvious” way!
I don’t usually post anti or solo rhetoric here unless it’s amusing and this is an example of that. lol. so they do believe those things are connected? that it’s too much of a coincidence???? it’s just that their conclusion is way off compared to a cpf’s. 🤣🤣🤣
that’s all i have for now. i skipped the others, and surprisingly a good number is how angry they are at li ning’s skateboard series. lol.
-END.
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unholydeukae · 7 months ago
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Sooo... any omegaverse Alpha dreamcatcher members in rut ideas?👀
I may have gone a little bit crazy on this one, especially with Gahyun, 😂, and ☀️ approved of Dami's moment, but without further ado, here are my ideas:
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Jiu is possessive and territorial much, when it gets bad she kicks Siyeon out of the room before she has her way with you and no one can get close to you or she will growl and drag you to her side while glaring at the “competition”;
She likes to leave hickeys, licking and nipping at them while they are still fresh;
She always checks on you, even while in rut she can control herself (when it's not that bad and you are tired she employs Siyeon or Yoohyeon's help to give you a break);
Her knot is the biggest of the group (Siyeon's a close second), so she's careful with that and moves you both to a comfortable position before she knots you, so you can cuddle while it takes its sweet time to deflate;
Her post-knot cuddles are the eighth wonder of the world.
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Sua gets clingier/more affectionate on the early stages of her rut, otherwise her behaviour doesn't change too much;
She often pulls you on her lap so you sit snugly on her growing hard on, turning you both on (her hands wander too on your thigh and she doesn't care if the other members see);
Loves to start things with a nice 69, both her hands and mouth need to do something until she's ready;
During sex though she's very into scratching your back or hips, depending if you are on your hands and knees or not;
Enjoys getting creative with positions, but eventually reverts to the classics before she knots so you can cuddle;
(After all is said and done, when she thinks you aren’t seeing, she pulls out a notebook and either crosses the new position out or adds it to the list of fun ones to use again in the future);
Her knot is the smallest of the group but still sizeable and takes a while to deflate, so while you wait she will caress you, kiss you, or simply talk about some new projects or date ideas for when you are both free. (Yep, her quietest is during the post orgasm haze, lol, but you love her for being herself no matter what).
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Siyeon: if Jiu can control herself, Siyeon runs on pure instinct, which got her in very awkward positions in the past since her hormone addled brain wouldn't discriminate any holes (even if it's just done with your hand or a hole in a wall);
Though she has learnt which are the ones she can knot and what aren't supposed to be;
She doesn't speak much, too focused into getting in your pants;
Loves to bite, especially your shoulders;
All her energy is spent fucking you into the mattress (or couch, or floor- sometimes she's too impatient for her own good) and you don't mind it in the least. You love her when she normally makes love to you and you still love her when she uses you as a set of holes to breed;
(Once or twice you might have fantasised about getting pregnant with her baby- that made you cum so hard you swear you saw Jesus);
(You probably just saw Yoohyeon’s photo)
Knotting you once isn't enough, she needs to do so at least twice -her record is four and you passed out after that- then she will finally speak once again and her raw voice turns you on enough to ride her for one last round just to hear more of it, then you cuddle before either showering or falling asleep.
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Handong: sometimes it pisses you off when her rut comes because you can never tell until it’s too late. And it starts with a bang;
You could be watching a movie with the others, cuddled up to her with no cares in the world, her hand caressing your arm and back, then she either gropes your tit or your backside and you gasp so loud everyone notices. Tonight, she decides that you two will be a better form of entertainment;
In fact, compared to the others, Handong in rut likes to have an audience and often lets them join, but your pussy is hers and no one else's.
She will start sweetly enough, dragging you to her lap to make out until she’s the only thing occupying your thoughts (it takes an embarrassingly short time, she’s that good)
Then she will make you grind on her lap, getting her nice and hard while she massages your ass and once she deems you ready enough she will ask you in her mother tongue to undress yourself, smirking when you flush and stand on trembling legs to fulfil her request. You are so weak when she speaks in Chinese.
Meanwhile she simply lowers her pants and pulls her leaking cock out of her boxers, she loves it when you make a mess on her cock that it can’t help but stain her clothes;
(While this is going on the others are getting ready themselves, probably jerking or sucking each other off in various states of undress);
Then you are back on her lap, sat on her cock and feeling all kind of good- you would prefer she took her clothes off, but soon enough she and everyone else will get naked too.
The first to join while you are riding her is -as always- Gahyun, the members must have some kind of agreement because it’s always her, but you don’t mind, you never do. And with that Handong doesn’t mind slowing to a stop because Gahyun’s strength is nothing to joke about, just her thrusts are enough to make you move on Handong’s cock and leave you breathless.
It goes on until she slips out and jerks off to cum on your back, she watches it slide down for a moment before she’s pushed to the side by Yoohyeon, while Sua sits on the back rest and drags your head to suck her off;
You can feel her eyes burning holes in your head as you sloppily take Sua’s cock, then moan loud when Handong starts again fucking you while Yoohyeon jackhammers into you;
She never cums/try to knot you while the others fuck you, when she feels close she slows down, maybe she starts taking off the pieces of clothing she can. Meanwhile you are losing your mind by everything you are feeling at once.
After the last one has came on you (usually Jiu, and she only asks you to suck her off so she can paint your face), Handong picks you up and makes you lay down on the couch, where Dami has spread a towel after she was done fucking your ass, and your senses are all occupied by Handong.
She’s bracing herself with her elbows beside your head, so you just see her, her hair obscuring your vision of the others, whatever cum was on your face is gathered by a long dainty finger which is then pushed into your mouth before Handong kisses you deeply until you can taste only her, her perfume filling your lungs, the craved skin on skin contact... the straw that breaks the camel’s back is when she leans into your ear and, right before she knots you, she tells you to cum. So you do.
Her knot is perfect for you, big enough to give you a delicious stretch without an ounce of pain, and lasts not too long like Jiu nor too short like Gahyun’s, so she rolls you both over and you use her as a human sized pillow while the others go clean up.
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Yoohyeon; You notice because she starts biting you more often. She nips at your neck, your shoulder or, when you are busy talking with a member or are over the phone you give her a finger and she starts nibbling at it while looking at you in search of more attention;
When she gets you alone, be it in her room or even in a semi public space like the company’s bathroom (sometimes you both forget to check when her rut is supposed to arrive, so you have to improvise), she will beg you to let her fuck you;
And who are you to refuse her, when she looks too much like a hopeful puppy? You hate disappointing Pie when you show her you don’t have treats, and you equally hate to let her owner down when you have what she needs/wants.
If you are home, you take your time, sucking her off and getting her ready for you -which doesn’t take long- (if you are in the company you skip to the main event, you love bending over and letting her fuck you from behind in front of the bathroom mirror), then you let her guide you to the position she wants, usually doggy style, and then she sets off;
She’s never been a patient one during her rut, and pairing it with how vocal she gets -even more than usual, that is-, you can’t help but find it adorable. Not during the act, though, you are busy thinking how glad you are she’s also a dancer, with how good she can hit all the right places in your pussy- But later, when you are both sated you’ll think back on these moments and would tease her, if she wasn’t already snoring;
In fact, while her knot is average in both size and lasting time, she is so tired she will fall asleep as soon as she lays beside you;
She’s lucky she’s cute, even when drooling;
(Who are we kidding, you love her no matter what, drool and snoring in your ear included).
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Dami is controlled like Jiu, but gets progressively more flushed the longer she ignores her rut, and begins squirming, for as long as you aren’t around her cock, any position -seated or standing- is uncomfortable;
So you have to take the first step and make her find you naked on her bed;
Then all premises are off and she’s quick to lock the door and undress before joining you;
She enjoys working you both up, even if her cock is begging to be inside you. She likes kissing you all over, leaving hickeys here and there and a little bite mark on your shoulder where you both know Siyeon will be able to see it, then once she’s done worshipping you she manhandles you on your knees, pulling your hips up and starts fucking you like a whore.
There’s name calling, some hair pulling, sometimes she spanks you, but more often than not she loves pushing her fingers in your mouth and have you suck on them as if it were her dick, sometimes sliding them deeper until you gag on them, especially when you are on your back, even better when you are in a mating press so you can’t do anything but simply take it- take her however she wants and you can only look at her with tears in your eyes, only spurring her on;
She makes you cum at least twice before she knots you, and even then she will still try to coax more out of you, rubbing your clit and moving her hips as much as she can until you are an overstimulated mess.
After all is said and done she will pamper you; she will clean you both up, helping you into a clean set of her underwear, then you cuddle, enjoying the skin on skin contact until you eventually fall asleep.
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Gahyun is whiny at the beginning, more needy to feel your touch in any capability, then when it hits her fully she will lock the door of your room and neither of you will come out until she's satisfied (she will give you breaks, dw, she has learnt to not break her toys) or one or both need food/water;
Likes to hold your chest or butt: in public her hands will often gravitate towards your ass, but in private she likes pawing at your chest;
Very rough in bed, to start things off she likes to riles herself up by making you choke on her cock, towering over you while you're kneeling or laying on your back with your head over the edge, listening to you gag and watching you drooling over yourself works wonders on her;
She likes to pull your hair while in doggy, or slapping your ass, or she grabs your tits to twist your nipples.
Her knot is sizeable, not as much as Jiu, and deflates shortly after she has finished filling you up, so to “thank you” for your service she either lovingly cleans you up herself or -if she feels like going for more- calls Siyeon or Sua unnie and watches as on of them makes you come with their tongue (when that happened you are never able to walk the next day and she takes advantage of that by spoiling you rotten and taking care of any need of yours).
Bonus scene:
You are lucky they haven't gotten their rut all together yet, because then you are sure you are bound to get pregnant or meet the creator because while they can't get enough of you, you can't get enough of them, anything else is secondary, especially when you are in heat :)
(Jiu and Dami would never let you see the wrong kind of light, don't worry, you just need to listen to your alphas like the good omega you are)
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imaginespazzi · 2 months ago
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Yeah honestly, i'm just grateful she kept shooting cause we all know the old Azzi would have stopped shooting and passed everything up after the 3rd missed shot so I am happy about that. Same, I would have liked her to have gone to her midrange game a little more but pretty much all the threes she took were good, open looks and the rim was just a little too unkind to her unfortunately. Hopefully they finally go down next game, also just so that it boosts her confidence even further. But yeah otherwise, her defense and playmaking were outstanding!
And at the end of the day, just seeing Azzi out on that court, moving well, is always gonna put a smile on my face - whether she's bricking or not 😂🥹
YES!! I think it shows a lot about the work she don't on a mental and emotional level that she didn't take those misses to heart and start overthinking (which we all know she's been prone to do in the past) and I just think it's a matter of seeing two or three down consecutively and she'll be right back where she was.
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And yep, like I said I'd love to see her go that midrange like she did against Ole Miss (or my personal favorite against Iowa) and see if she can maybe work inside out but it would be wrong to say she wasn't taking good shots/threes today.
Honestly, it's been such a journey to get to her 50th game (!!) that it truly is just wonderful to see her out there, smile on her face, playing the game she loves.
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nanamatox3 · 1 year ago
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a new blog! Can i ask for headcanons for the jjk men saying "i love you" but you not saying it back? Thank you!
Of course! And welcome~ 🤗
Yuji itadori
He is just about to leave when he tells you "love you babe! I'm going now!"
And you just answer with a "mhmm, bye "
He pauses
"Babe."
"Yes? What's wrong"
He walks back to you and takes your face in his hands "i love you!"
You really have to try not to laugh, hes like a lil puppy waiting for praise
"Uh-huh, you're going to be late yuji"
Hes annoyed now "well, im not leaving until you say it back! So say it back pleaseee!"
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Megumi Fushiguro:
Please dont do this to poor Megumi, hes gonna overthink this so bad
Did he do or say something for you not wanting to say it back? Didnt you hear him?
Snaps out of it when you say his name
Poor Megumi TELL HIM NOTHING IS WRONG AND THAT IT WAS A JOKE 😭
Will hug you and be like "ok, now say it back.............................please"
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Yuta Okkotsu:
I think he wouldn't notice right away
He happily opens the door about to leave when he gets this feeling like 'wait a minute' (everytime i read, hear or say it i think about the kazoo kid, am i the only one? 😂😂 ok ,ok sorry BACK TO YUTA)
He'll also think he did something
"Love?" "yes?" "did i do something?"
Poor boys hands are so clammy
You just cant take it because hes too cute so you tell him it was a joke
Hes so relieved!!
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Gojo satoru:
Now we all know how dramatic he can be
"I love you~" "mhm" .....blink
How.....HOW DARE YOU NOT SAY IT BACK!!!!
shocked pikachu face
Hes going to move closer to you "i love you." blink, blink "i know, babe"......oh okay so you're playing games...
This means he will become even more obnoxious about it "iloveyouiloveyouiloveyouiloveyouiloveyouiloveyou......" "OKAY I KNOW, YOURE GOING TO BE LATE IDIOT!"
Gasp did you also on top of not saying 'i love you' back, say that he was an idiot?!
"Okay. ...I'm leaving.....no sexy time for you later hmpf"
Wait...
"Noooo i was joking!! Satoru wait! I said it was a..........aw man :("
Yep no sexy time....better think of a good way to apologize.... (Wink winkkkk ;) you know wink~ he said no but can he really say no? )
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Geto Suguru:
He notices right away
But still wears his smile " darling? Did i do something to upset you? "
You look at him acting confused "mh? No nothing is wrong but if you dont hurry you're going to be late sugu"
"Okay then...i love you" "see you later sugu"
Turns around because that are not the words he wants to hear
"Darling~"
Its sounds so sweet but you know better than to keep teasing "say it back."
"I love you"
"Good girl :)"
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Nanami Kento:
Now he will be a bit confused but hes an adult so hell just go to work
But on his way home he is thinking about where he fucked up
But he can think of anything....
Frustrated he'll ask you "what is it?"
"I dont know what you mean?"
"Y/N....."
You place your hand on his cheek and smile at him " i love you kento"
Ok now hes blushing what a sweetie
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Hope you'll like Them if you want a part 2 lemme know babes~💓
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hockeyandhrsepwr · 2 years ago
Text
Birthday boy
*little Trevor Zegras x best friend (👀) reader insta edit for his birthday**
yourusername
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liked by jamie.drysdale, _quinnhughes & others
Yourusername happy birthday Fucker  
view all comments
📌 Yourusername I’m just joking, happy birthday to the best friend a girl could ask for!! 🫶
TrevorZegras wow, really feeling the love
jamie.drysdale you know what you did 
TrevorZegras no I dont?! 
jamie.drysdale right, it’s what you didn’t do
Yourusername ☝️
Jackhughes happy birthday Z
TrevorZegras at least someone appreciates me
Yourusername did he feed post for you?
TrevorZegras now that you say that…..
Yourusername Doesn't even use your full name
Youusername not even a story post either smh 
JackHughes I’m busy!!
Yourusername this is why I’m the supreme best friend not you
JackHughes Trevor!! Tell her she’s wrong
TrevorZegras I can’t
Jackhughes what does she have over you?
Jamie.drysdale too much lol
Anaheimducks our favourite swiftie finally hit his TS birthday 
Yourusername that he did
ColeCaufield Feeling 22
Yourusername wow Cole, so original
ColeCaufield we were all thinking it!!!
Yourusername but only you said it
TaylorSwift happy birthday Trevor!!
Jamie.drysdale what the hell?
TrevorZegras………
Yourusername did I not tell you we’re friends
TTerry19 He’s sat in his stall gaping like a fish. You’ve shut him up for once
Yourusername Thanks for the update Troy
_alexturcotte That won’t last long
TrevorZegras 5 years we’ve been friends 
MasonMctavish23 oh Jesus, here we go
jackHughes The betrayal speech?
Masonmctavish23 yes sir
Yourusername is he monologuing yet?
Masonmctavish23 unfortunately 
Shattdeuces hes recording it because he's too worked up to type it for you rn
yourusername 😂 I've heard it before
_quinnhughes Happy birthday annoying brother #6
Yourusername Quinn I love you for that
lhughes_06 Happy birthday Zeegs, can we circle back to this? Who the hell are #3-5
Yourusername I’m assume Turcs is in there somewhere 
_quinnhughes yep, Alex & Cole & Dylan
lhughes_06 what?
Dylanduke.25 I’m honoured 
User16 Trevors in best friend jail 🤣
User72 wonder what he did
User12 the comment section correction
User22 no one seems to have noticed it😂
Yourusername They saw it, they’re just choosing not to acknowledge it
TrevorZegras
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liked by JackHughes, anaheimducks & others
TrevorZegras best birthday present I could’ve asked for #upgrades #shesmygfnow 
view all comments
Yoruusername that has to be the lamest hashtag ever. Are you 12?
Masonmctavish23 mentally yes
Yourusername true
Jamie.drysdale can’t believe it
_alexturcotte FINALLY!!
Jackhughes the gc is going wild rn
Jamie.drysdale so ours!!
Colecaufield he actually did it?
jamie.drysdale 30 minutes ago, I’ll send you the video
Jackhughes me too!
_quinnhughes just add him to the GC 
Yourusername that’s why youre the smart one Quinn
_quinnhughes thanks. Good luck with him 
Yoruusername oh hes a handful 😏
Jamie.drysdale yuck
mattboldy couldn’t have waited 2 fucking weeks Trev?
_alexturcotte oh shit, I won!!
Cam.York damnit!
ColeCaufield I was off by two days😭
TrevorZegras You were betting on us? 😦
Jackhughes duh
Anaheimducks obviously 
Colecaufield dude you’ve been in love with her since high school
Yourusername it gets reevaluated every 4 months for new dates
_johnbeecher we're on the 10th round I think
TrevorZegras yourusername YOURE IN ON IT?
Yourusername to quote one Jack Hughes “duh”
TrevorZegras dont bring him into this!! 
Yourusername You wouldn’t get your head out of your ass! I could’ve at least made some money from it
TrevorZegras you could’ve made a move!!
Yourusername nah why would I do that
jamie.drysdale you could just have this conversation. You’re sitting across from each other
Yourusername shut it Jim
TrevorZegras yeah, zip it
User24 the Ducks admin betting on Trevors love life wasn’t on my bingo card 
Anaheimducks Its the whole team!! 
TrevorZegras Jesus how many people are actually involved?
Yourusername Secretary Alex?
_alexturcotte at this date, 65
TrevorZegras WHAT!!
Yoruusername yep, you’ve just made Lex a very rich man
Tterry19 atta boy!!
Masonmctavish23 be honest, its just so you can meet TSwizzle
TrevorZegras shhhh 
Yourusername 🤨
TrevorZegras I’m joking, I love you very much 
Yourusername 😌
User727 always thought they’d be a good couple
User71 best friends to lovers? Elite trope
User02 FINALLY!!! I’ve been waiting for this!
User542 Bestie we all have!!
User98 65 people betting 😮
User62 I’m just wondering how much Turcotte will actually make
Yourusername it’s at least 4 figures! Everyone had different amounts
Xxx
600 notes · View notes
oensible · 2 months ago
Text
"Nothing to see here, just Hannan and @/jasondemers5 using @/BrodieNBCS as a crash dummy 😂" —Sharks on NBCS/X (2024 Mar 19)
[Video description: Brodie Brazil hosting a Sharks game intermission segment in which retired NHL players and former Sharks Jason Demers and Scott Hannan demonstrate how to win hockey board battles. The clip opens with them introducing the segment while standing on the ice in front of a net. They are in skates and are holding sticks, but the only visible protective hockey equipment is their gloves and Brodie's helmet. For completeness, transcript below the cut will include the opening and closing segments that are not included in the video but were in the original broadcast cut. There will be notes on where the clip above actually starts/ends in the transcript.
BB: We're here to talk about how to win a board battle.
JD: Scotty's favorite. (Hannan laughs)
BB: Who wants to go first? Hanner?
SH: Well, definitely when me and JD played together, (Demers and Brodie laugh) SH: I was the guy who went into the boards and, and—
BB: He's the support guy.
JD: I'm—yeah.
SH: —one battle, we let JD break the puck out—
JD: Yeah.
SH: —so it was a lot of controlling the guys, trying to have closure, and then allowing the puck to get to JD's stick for the breakout.
JD: I just say, "Hey kid, just give me the puck and I'll do the rest." (Hannan laughs) JD: I used to say—no, I always…
BB: Are there really tricks when the puck goes to the wall, and your opponent's there, and you both arrive at the same time? Like, what are we trying to gain out this? It seems simple, but there's a lot of technique to it.
SH: No, there's a lot, there's a lotta technique, you gotta control—sometimes, you're facing guys that are really quick, and they can really move, then other times you're facing really big, strong guys. You look at, like, guys like Kopitar, they're big bodies, they can muscle ya—Joe was a big guy like that. Whereas there's quickness, too. You look at Sidney Crosby and MacKinnon. You gotta contain them in a different way, but once you got contact—
BB: Yep.
SH: —it's how you close and control their bodies.
BB: You know, like JD I'm there for support, but I'm out at the red line for support. Just find me, find me with the puck. Yep. I'll be going there right away.
JD: But if you ever do get in a battle, especially for kids, it's to never go in with your stick up in the air, you always wanna get stick on puck first, close the distance, and then you get to the—we used to call it the "Scotty Hannan two-hand"—and then you get in tight.
(Demers demonstrates by holding his stick in both hands across his body with his arms flat to his sides, then skates forward, gently driving the shaft of the stick into Brodie's hip to shove him.)
BB: Scotty two-hand!
JD: Scotty two-hand! And then you get in on the hips, and like [NOTE: The clip above begins here.] you said you… but you also—there's so many nuances because in a split second you gotta recognize if you got a quick guy or a strong guy, someone who's faster than you and then you gotta kind of adjust. But the one thing you can always control is containing them with your stick on the ice.
(Cut to Brodie standing at the boards and Hannan a few feet out from him, getting ready to demonstrate their board battle advice.)
SH: So, you heard JD say, most important part is the puck. (he gestures to the puck a few feet in front of Brodie) SH: That's something I'm trying to get, I wanna take the body, I wanna come through the hands with stick on puck. So we'll go through it slow, so I come in here. Here! Press! (Brodie skates slowly along the boards with the puck. Hannan skates in alongside him, sliding his stick under his and preventing it from moving so that he loses control of the puck. He proceeds to pin Brodie to the boards with his body weight, kicking the puck out with his skate for Demers to retrieve it. Brodie, smiling, proceeds to make a continuous strangled sound and wiggle helplessly with his tongue sticking out.) SH: I just connect and I can kick it out with my feet. (Hannan glances over at Brodie, then squishes into him a few more times for emphasis.) SH: You see how I come through the body here like this, I control, here.
(Hannan laughs as he finally releases Brodie. Brodie slides to the ice dramatically, then Demers comes over to gently smack him in the helmet a few more times for good measure. As the camera cuts back to focus on Hannan, Brodie gets back up on his feet.)
SH: And usually, the guys are a little stronger on the puck than what Brodie showed there, but—
BB: (interjecting) I feel like Scott Nichol right now!
(Both of them start giggling. CONTEXT: Nichol is a retired NHL center who played with the Sharks from 2009 to 2011. When he was with the Sharks, he was known for being reliable on faceoffs and making lots of hits. He is also 5'8, relatively short for an NHL player.)
(Cut to them back in position for another demonstration.)
SH: Again, I wanna come stick on puck, and I wanna come through the hands and play the body on Brodie. 'Kay?
(Brodie starts to skate, but Hannan skates into him, pressing him into the boards with the front of his body and pinning his stick to the boards with his own. Demers skates past, plucking the puck out from between them. Brodie struggles in vain to get free.)
BB: Oagh! Oohuhguhghh-Tied up! I'm tied up! Ourghh
(Cut to them back in position for another demonstration, but it's Demers about to show what to do instead of Hannan this time.)
JD: Sometimes, you need a little bit o' finesse and not so much brawn, so when you got a quick guy like Brodie, who—we'll see how quick his tight turns are—
(Brodie is nodding in the background with a huge grin on his face.)
JD: —that can spin off checks, you have to be able to readjust, keep your stick with the puck, contain, until you can get into position to close on 'em. So let Brodie show up.
(Brodie starts to skate with the puck.)
JD: So Brodie's comin' up! Turn—
(Brodie attempts to pivot back to evade Demers, but Demers pivots back with him, uses his stick to lifts Brodie's stick off the puck, then presses his front into Brodie's stick and his leg into Brodie's leg to pin him to the boards as the puck glides ahead for Hannan to pick up.)
BB: Huaugh!
(Cut to closeup of Brodie talking to the camera.)
BB: I'm the crash test dummy here, I can see.
(Brodie skates at the boards with the puck and attempts to turn back to shake off Demers who is a few feet out to his side.)
[NOTE: The clip above ends here.]
(Demers proceeds to get him in the lower back with the Scotty two-hand and Brodie immediately crumples to the ice, resuming his tortured vocalizations as Demers keeps him pinned down with his stick and lightly punches him in the helmet a few times. Hannan picks up the puck and skates away with it.)
(Cut to a shot of the three standing on the ice, similar to how the video started.)
BB: Alright guys, I think we might be done with this one, yeah.
(Hannan taps Brodie on the shins with his stick as he attempts to flee the scene.)
SH: You gotta get the shin pads on there, hey Brodie?
BB: Yea—ohh I forgot 'em! I forgot 'em, augh…
(Demers joins in by giving him a poke to the shins, too, and Hannan gives him another stick tap, this time to the butt.)
SH: What's goin' on there? You put gear on there, bud!
(Brodie skates back to stand between them.)
BB: Uhh, it's intimidating, it's intimidating to see somebody approaching you, so—no, but like that's, that's important stuff, how to win that battle and how to, how to move that puck.
JD: I think Scotty said it perfectly, it's once you close the distance, it's going through the hands. You wanna eliminate the hands, because the hands are what, for an offensive guy, that's what makes the play. So it's always important; a lot of people get into the stick, they'll get into the body, but they won't get through the hands, which kinda locks up the kid—or the guy, or the kid, whoever it is.
SH: And as the better players get, I talk to my kids all the time, when they're up here, here, (he mimes cross-checking Brodie in the shoulders/chest area) SH: the good players will make plays here, here, here, (he puts this stick back down close to the ice and mimes stickhandling a puck) SH: with the stick. You don't control the stick and the puck, guys'll still gonna be able to make plays.
BB: Alright boys, I'm out four to six weeks. See ya later. (Brodie skates away as the other two laugh.)
End of video description.]
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sihtricfedaraaahvicius · 2 years ago
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Hi. I was wondering if you'd be willing to write an kind of AU where Sihtric can actually hear people's thoughts. Something like telepathy. And he meets Reader and he can hear all her thoughts also about himself. That would be kind of scary 😂 but also I'm sure you'd make it super fun. I don't care if you make it medieval or modern,anything you'd like.
Note: giving u all a break from my Halloween fic as I edit the next chapters. And oh my god, this idea was so cute! I could've made this SUCH a long fic, but I got too much going on already, so I kept it simple. hope you like it!
Warnings: suggestive, lots of curse words...
pairing: Modern!Sihtric x you (f)
Summary: Sihtric noticed a new library employee, and you certainly had loud thoughts about him.
Word count: 1,8k 
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'I just can't focus on the words anymore.'
Sihtric worked from home, as it was the only way he could keep a job. And to prevent himself from isolating, he goes to the library every day, when his work was done. He had been going to the library ever since he recently moved, and by now he already knew all the employees by face, and thoughts. But today, as he had to return a book he had borrowed, he saw someone new behind the service desk. Someone seemingly innocent who took his breath away at first glance.
*******************
Sihtric was blessed with a curse. He was one of the very few who was able to hear other people's thoughts. It had driven him insane when he grew up. But as he got older, he learned how to deal with it. He could almost tune it out, so to speak, but it was still always there. He was sick and tired of the people in his hometown, so he had recently moved. He found the library in his new city a lovely place, as it was quiet and with little people around, and those who were around usually had no thoughts going on, because they were reading or writing in peace.
'Hi,' you looked up from your computer, 'how can I help you?' Holy shit, you thought, which Sihtric heard.
'Hey,' Sihtric smiled, 'eh, I'd like to return this book.'
'Sure thing, you got your library card?' what the fuck…
'Of course, hold on, it's somewhere in my backpack,' Sihtric said and started rummaging around in the bag.
Where did this guy come from? Oh my god… what a babe. That jawline, that accent, those arms- wait, are those scars on his face? Oh my… I sure like a bad boy. And that hair! Oh, sweet Jesus, the wild hair. Wait, what book is he returning… you glanced at the book on your desk, damn, A Brief History of Time? Okay… pretty boy got the brains too...
Sihtric smirked as he looked for his library card. He usually didn't enjoy hearing what people thought of him, but you had to be the prettiest lady he had ever seen. And he was happy to hear you thought he wasn't bad himself.
'Here,' he handed you the card and looked into your eyes.
What the fuck, he has two different coloured eyes? IS THAT EYELINER? Oh my fucking god, I am very unwell right now…
'Thanks,' you smiled as you took his card. 
Are those lines tattooed on his fingers? Jesus fucking christ, I'd let this guy rail me in the backroom right now…
Sihtric suddenly coughed and tried to compose himself as you scanned his card and the book he's returning.
'There you go. Anything else?' you pushed his library card back over your desk and smiled. If you need any help… anything… ANYTHING
'It's taken care of?' he asked while putting the card back in his backpack, trying not to smile.
'Yep, you can borrow another book again if you wish.' do you want me to read you anything? At night? In bed perhaps?
'Thanks,' he smiled, 'not to be nosy, but… are you new here? I've been here daily for a few weeks now, ever since I moved, and I haven't seen you before.'
Aha, new guy in town I see… well, hello...
'Oh, no, I've been working here for years,' you said, 'but I was on holiday, only returning last weekend. So back to work it is.' you are hotter than the temperature on that island I was at…
'I see,' Sihtric chuckled, 'a damn shame time flies when you're on holiday, right?'
'A damn shame,' you smiled. A damn shame you're probably not single…
'I am,' Sihtric blurted out.
'W-what?' you froze. What the fuck?! 
'I mean,' Sihtric cleared his throat, 'I… I am Sihtric,' he saved himself, holding his hand out to you.
'S-Sihtric,' you smiled, 'I'm (y/n),' you said and shook his hand. Fuck, I love a guy with a firm handshake. I wonder what else is firm about him…
'Nice to meet you,' Sihtric tried to suppress a grin, 'I'll be seeing you around.' He winked before he turned his back to you, on his way to pick another book to read.
He did not just wink. Did he wink? Oh my god. OH. MY. GOD. I have to text the girls…
Sihtric chuckled to himself as he heard your thoughts. He scanned his eyes over numerous titles until he found something that seemed interesting, before he purposely went to sit close to the service desk. Close to you. 
You looked up as you saw movements in the corner of your eye, and you found Sihtric smiling at you as he sat down. Sir, the whole library is free… why… why must you sit there. A torture.
'Found a new one to read,' Sihtric said, holding up a book.
'Enjoy,' you chuckled. My god, he is cute. He is ridiculously cute. And hot. That's it, I'm calling the cops. This is a whole crime… I better call the fire brigade too. AND the medics, because someone needs to check my pulse…
Sihtric hid his face behind his book and couldn't stop smiling. He thought you were cute, yet not that innocent though. But Sihtric didn't mind that, because if he was honest; he would totally rail you in the backroom too right now. But he was a gentleman, for now, and you were at work. 
******************
Do your job, girl, come on. Stop letting your eyes wander to the insanely hot guy with the strange name- oh, fuck no!
Sihtric looked up from his book.
'Hello, beautiful!' a man said as he walked up to you.
'Shhh! This is a library!' you hissed quietly, 'how many times do I have to tell you?'
'I know, I know,' the man said more quietly now, 'just came here to see you again.'
I know, you fucking creep. You smiled.
'So, you never answered my question the other day… when I was here?' the man said and leaned over the counter, peeking at your legs under your work skirt. I'd make good work of those legs, mhm.
Sihtric grimaced at the unheard interaction. You were clearly creeped out by the guy, and rightfully so, he was old enough to be your grandfather, but he clearly had other ideas than slipping you some money to go and buy an ice cream, you know, the thing grandfathers are supposed to do.
'I'm sorry, but it's a work policy that I cannot go out with customers,' you said politely. This lie better fucking work…
'Oh, come on,' the man said. One night, he thought, that's all I need to ravag-
'Lady?' Sihtric called out to you, 'do you have a moment?'
'Yes!' you rushed away from the old creep. Oh thank god, praise the lord. Wait, better grab that clipboard and hold it behind my back so the creep can't check out my ass…
'Do you need something?' you asked Sihtric.
'Not really,' he whispered, 'but, I couldn't help noticing…' Sihtric cocked his head slightly towards the old man.
Fucking hell, that's how obvious it is? This is so embarrassing…
'Yeah,' you said softly, 'he's been hitting on me for months,' you made a grossed out face, 'I keep telling him no but he keeps coming back.'
'Won't your boss do anything about that?'
'My boss?' you scoffed, 'he doesn't give a shit about the employees.' He only cares about money. He doesn't even care that the creep waits outside until closing time, following me home…
'Can I help you somehow?' Sihtric asked, concerned about the behaviour of the man and the way no one seemed to care.
Oh my god, he's so fucking cute… why can't this guy wait outside for me until closing time...
'No,' you smiled weakly, 'that's…that's really sweet, but there's nothing you can do, I'm afraid.' But you could hold me in those muscular arms…
'Okay,' Sihtric said, 'does he… does he stick around?' he carefully asked.
'Yeah, the creep figured out my shifts… his name is Aethelhelm, by the way, I guess calling "the creep" is a bit rude.'
'No worries,' Sihtric smiled, 'he looks like a creep.'
'He is,' you laughed softly and looked into Sihtric's eyes. Fuck… this guy is so beautiful. Wait, did his eyes just light up?
Sihtric quickly looked away and bit down on his lip.
'Anyway,' you cleared your throat, 'I… I should get back to work. Back to the creep,' you made a face, to which Sihtric smiled. 'But thanks for the distraction.'
'Anytime, lady,' Sihtric said and gave you a small nod. And he couldn't help checking out your ass when you walked back to your desk, and he bit down a smile when he heard your thoughts.
Yeah... I'd totally let him do me in the backroom…
**********************
'You finished that book already?' you asked about an hour later, when you saw Sihtric got up and was on his way to head out of the library. What kind of question is that, you dumbass. Well done being smooth…
'I guess,' you smiled. I hope so…
'No,' Sihtric smiled and shrugged. He had been glancing at you the whole time when you managed to focus on your work again, and his eyes kept trailing back to you. 
'I just can't focus on the words anymore,' Sihtric continued, 'so that's my signal to go home. I'll see you around.'
*******************
'No, no, no,' you sighed when you saw Aethelhelm was waiting for you again as you closed the library. Maybe if I'm really fast he won't be able to catch up with me...
You quickly locked the door and almost sprinted around the corner, where you bumped into someone.
'I'm sorry!' you blurted out. Oh my god… oh no…oh no, I'm feeling myself blush!
'Oh, hey,' Sihtric smiled, 'are you okay? You look a little spooked.'
'Yeah, fine,' you lied and glanced back over your shoulder, 'just eager to get home.' 
And get away from that fucking creep! Oh, no. No he's coming over. Oh for fuck sakes.
You looked back at Sihtric. I hope you will forgive me…
You grabbed Sihtric by his shirt and pulled him in for a kiss. It took him a few seconds to adapt to the situation. He already knew you were hiding from Aethelhelm, but didn't quite expect this. Yet he wasn't complaining, and he kissed you back without hesitation.
Fuck he's a good kisser, you thought, and Sihtric smiled against your lips as he pulled you closer. 
Oh my god, you moaned softly against his lips, oh my god, fuck, he's so hot. Wait, what is he doing, you felt Sihtric's hands slide down your lower back, onto your ass. Sihtric knew "the creep" would see it, and he also knew what you had been thinking about earlier that day, so he amusingly squeezed your ass, firmly.
Oh, fuck, those hands… oh dear lord, I will be thinking about him tonight…  
You raked your fingers through his loose hair, kissing him as Sihtric pushed you back towards the library entrance while "the creep" had already turned and left, looking upset. 
Wait… you thought as you were pushed up against the library door, his lips still pressed onto yours, what… what is he doing… the library is closed…
'You wish to be railed in the backroom, lady?' Sihtric grinned
Oh, sweet Jesus, it's like he can read my thoughts, yes, please...
******************
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