#I just have the Hairless the Musical songs stuck in my head

[kakusu-shipping]

Back at it, struggling with Selfship moodboards yet again.

Instead of doing one ship board I just did three general boards, sense these three are in their baby crush will they won't they phase and not actually a couple yet.

[mirkwoodshewolf]

Always family; John Deacon x teen reader

*Author’s note*

Hello all, I just wanted to share with you all ANOTHER Queen fic. Now this one here is pretty long so I’m sorry not sorry for the longness of this fic but it had to be done. Thought I’d dip my toe into the platonic Queen fics (besides my Rock Angel series) since requests will open up soon. I just want to catch up on all the requests that came to me over Winter break that the anons have been waiting so patiently on before I accept any new ones. So in this fic you the lovely reader are the cousin to this Disco man, but you both act more like brother-sister as you will soon see. Hope you all enjoy this little fic :)

Warnings: Family abandonment (IF THIS TRIGGERS ANYONE PLEASE DON’T STRAIN YOURSELF TO READ IT), angst, swearing, fluff, Paul prenter (Ugh) and the loveable and NASTY QUEENIES :) Enjoy my lovely darlings ;)

Taglist

@geek-and-proud

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*Nov. 1974, Live at the Rainbow*

It was another successful concert at the Rainbow theater.  Queen had once again performed a killer performance, and Brian now finally feeling better after his hepatitis scare knew he was ready to get back on stage and he performed his heart out to make up for what he had to miss while in the hospital.

The three main lead vocalists Freddie, Brian and Roger were heading towards their dressing room when they noticed someone sitting outside the door of their dressing room. She appeared to be about 15 possibly 16, had long (h/c) with platinum blonde highlights.  She wore a white crop top shirt, black leather jacket, denim blue jeans and high-heeled boots similar to what their bass player always wore.

They also took notice around her neck was a camera and she was also fiddling around with it, instantly knowing exactly how to operate it.  Freddie turned to Roger and teased out.

“Look Roger darling, the girl you ordered finally came.” Roger hit Freddie’s shoulder and told him to fuck off while Brian walked up to the girl and asked.

“Excuse me?” She looked up from her camera and they also saw that she was blowing up a bubble from the gum that she had been chewing.  She deflated the bubble as Brian said, “Can we help you?”

“Oh sorry I was just waiting for Deacy.” She responded before going back to her camera.

“You know John?” asked Roger.

“Do I know him? Of course I know him he—oh I get it. Typical Deacy, never likes to talk about me to his friends, thinks I’ll embarrass him or something.” She started off before trailing off into a teasing tone.  The three Queen members were still confused to just who exactly this young girl was.  She then gestured to herself as she continued, “I’m (Y/n) Deacon, Deacy’s cousin.” She then dug into her jean pocket and innocently held out a packet of gum as she said, “Gum?”

*My POV*

Hello people and beyond! The name’s (y/n) Deacon. I was born March 7th, 1959.  And before you ask, yes I am related to John Richard Deacon bass player of Queen.  He’s my older cousin but if you ask me he’s been more like a brother to me than my cousin.

In fact it was Deacy who got me interested in electrics, so much so that I’ve taken photography classes in school and then once I get into University I hope to major in photography.  In fact the camera I always carry with me around my neck, Deacy actually got it for me three years ago on my 13th birthday.

I had heard about his little band from aunt Lillian and of course from my friends.  Now that Queen is starting to gain that spotlight of fame, I took the first bus I could in order to check and see if my dear Deacy hadn’t forgotten about me.

I was now sitting on the couch in the guys’ dressing room, Freddie was sitting close to me and I spoke up.

“Okay see that’s where I draw the line with cats, I mean c’mon who would want a hairless cat? It’s like you just turned a cat inside out and said, ‘here’s your new baby’. Plus if you leave it in the winter it’ll turn into a cat-cicle. But if you leave it out in the summer heat then it’ll be a sunburnt naked mole rat.”

“Brian, Roger make note of this that we are keeping this girl because she gets cat logic.” Freddie claimed as he wrapped an arm around me bringing me close in a one armed hug. I smiled and blushed slightly hiding my head bashfully.  We soon heard the door open and finally entering inside the dressing room was the Disco man himself.

“Deacy darling you’ve got some serious explaining to do.” Freddie proclaimed as if he were giving a proclamation.  Wide-eyed and startled like a deer in headlights he looked between his bandmates and that’s when Brian spoke up.

“Like why you didn’t tell us about your cousin?” I then made myself known by waving to John and telling him hi.  Finally taking notice of me, Deacy smiled and came over to me while I met him half way and the two of us hugged each other after not seeing him for a good couple of years now.

“What are you doing here?”

“What you didn’t think I’d miss the opportunity to miss my cousin performing on stage and finally get to see what all the fuss was about, now did yah?” I teased as I playfully shoved him.

“Did my mum drop you off?”

“Well actually I sorta begged her to get me a bus pass here to London.”

“You mean to tell me you came here all by yourself?” he demanded.

“Deaks I’m not a little girl anymore, I can take care of myself.” He sighed and said as he stroked my cheek with his thumb.

“I know you can, you know I just worry about you. Old habits die hard you know?”

“Gosh Deacy, who would’ve thought you were so overprotective? And here I thought you were the docile one.” teased Roger.

“Piss off Roger.” Defended Deacy.

“So (y/n), I’m just looking at these photographs of the concert and they are really good. Did you always want to be a photographer?” Brian said trying to change the conversation.

“Thanks Brian. And to answer your question not always. But I got interested in it at around 10 maybe 11 years old. It just started off taking pictures of the family dog Buddy and some birds, a few family outings but then when I turned 13 that’s when my interest in photography began to rise. In fact Deacy gave me this exact camera and showed me how to work out all the technical stuff with it for my 13th birthday.”

“I must say these are impressive. I would’ve thought a professional would’ve taken these.” Stated Roger as he picked up a photo.

“Aww come on you guys…..”

“No we’re serious (y/n) dear, you’ve got a gift.” Freddie said.

“That’s what I’ve always been telling her.” Said Deacy with a warm smile as he playfully ruffled my hair.  I smiled at them and thanked them.

For the rest of the night I got to know the rest of the members of Queen, not just as rock stars, but as my cousin’s best friends.  Most people know them as these four handsome young men trying to become famous rockstars, but I got to know their true selves.  Brian the smart astrophysicist interested in all things regarding the universe who made his dissertation about stardust.  

Roger who is known to most as the ‘heartthrob, womanizing, air-headed and stubborn drummer’ when actually he’s an intelligent person who first started off with dentistry (to which both Deacy and Brian teased him about) but then changed his profession to biology.  The first drummer to ever truly tune his drums before playing them.

And of course the front man Freddie Mercury.  Most people think he’s always the extravagant person both on and off stage, when in reality he’s just a humble, loving human being who studied design, loves cats and has his insecurities just like everyone else.

I knew from that night that I was going to see these boys not just as my cousin’s friends, but also an extended family.

3 years passed and any chance I got I would visit the boys during holiday breaks or stay with Deacy during the summers.  I even got the chance to go with them to Rockfield farm when they recorded “A Night at the Opera” because I was assigned a summer project for my photography class.  And when EMI saw my pictures, they actually hired me an internship with them to be the band’s official photographer.

Now that I am done with high school, I’m just waiting for the autumn to start so that I can officially start my University career in photography. The boys have definitely given me good practice for my camera work, doing pictures both on stage and for behind the scenes whether through the tours or them in the studio recording.  

They’re rowdy and silly but it’s awesome to see them work and I actually get to see the genius machine that is Queen on how they create their music.

We were currently in the studio and the boys were recording their newest song “We are the Champions”.  I was getting the best pictures that I could that the record company was asking for me. Some of the pictures included them in the booth rehearsing, or Freddie along with the sound technician at the sound table messing with the buttons and track, getting it to fit his vision.

Since they were on a strict deadline to get the song recorded, it meant more hours in the studio, hours that not even I could last very long with.  I yawned softly when I felt a tap at my shoulder.  I looked up to see Deacy standing beside me.

“You ready to head home?” I yawned again and nodded tiredly. “Alright missy, let’s get you home and into bed.” I moaned tiredly and raised my arms out and said.

“Carry me.”

“Are both your legs broken?” he teased.  I let out a tired whine.

“You’re mean Deacy.”

“C’mon you get up. I know you can do it.”

“Too tired to get up.” I groaned.

“Then allow me your royal majesty.” I heard Freddie say as I was then picked up princess style and I wrapped my arms around Freddie’s neck. “That better darling?”

“I love you Fred.” I stated bluntly.

“You’re going to spoil her too much Fred.” Deacy said.

“Oh come off it Deacy, she’s a darling and she’s been working so hard she deserves this.”

“Yeah Deacy, I deserve this. Why can’t you be more like Freddie?”

“Because I know when to set limits for you.” I stuck my tongue out at him and then I was carried out of the studio and placed into Deacy’s Volvo.  Deacy followed suit and we all bid each other a goodnight and soon Deacy pulled out of the parking lot and drove us back home.

We both entered quietly so that we didn’t wake up either Veronica or baby Bobby.  Deacy and I kissed each other goodnight and I went to my guest room and got out of my jeans, didn’t even bother to get out of my shirt and just plopped on my bed and went to sleep.

The next day was like any other day, the guys had just gotten done finishing the final touches to “We are the Champions” and we were all celebrating.  Roger uncorked the bottle of wine and poured the guys a drink while I got some non-alcoholic cider, but I knew that Roger would let me sneak in a sip of wine when Deacy wasn’t looking.  As we were all gathered around just sharing stories and what not, it was then Paul came in and said.

“Freddie, boys there’s someone here to see you.” Roger and I looked at each other and he muttered.

“Hopefully the police to take him away for being an utter annoyance.” I snickered softly which made Paul glare at me and that’s when he said.

“Come on in Mrs.” And soon walking into the studio was someone I thought I’d never see again.  My body tensed up and my heart sunk, it felt like I had gotten punched in the gut and had all the air knocked out of me as a blast from the past came back and stood before this very room.

Her familiar (h/c) now shorter than I remembered but she still kept it the same style, her (e/c) looking right at me.  She looked a bit more run down than from what I remembered, probably got involved in drugs since that’s the big thing nowadays.

“Hello (y/n).” She started off.  I stood up and just glared at her.  “God you’ve—you’ve grown up so fast.” She tried to lighten up the mood.  Really? How dare she come back after all these years. In fact how did she find out where I was?  I walked out of the room avoiding another glance at her and slammed the door loud behind me.

*John’s POV*

“So…..where are the groceries?” I demanded.

“John please—”

“No, no I really want to know. Because you’re finally here, but I see no groceries.” I stood up and continued as I walked up towards her, “I mean that’s what you said when you dropped her off with mum, your sister. But news flash Katherine. You’re 15 years too late!” I now stood face to face with her, hell I almost lost my composure and wanted to hit her so hard.

“Whoa, whoa Deacy take it easy! Take it easy!” Brian said pulling me away from her.

“Deacy darling you’ve never acted this way before, just who is this woman?”

“Unfortunately she’s my mum’s younger sister. My aunt……”

“(Y/n)’s mother.” She finished.

“No, no, no! You lost that right when you abandoned her that day!” I snapped.

“Deacy calm down, calm down.” Brian said as he placed his hand to my chest trying to get me to calm down, but at this point I knew nothing would.

“Why are you here? How did you even know she’d be here?” I demanded.

“I’ve known how close you both were when you were kids, so I figured that she’d be with you. And when I heard about where Queen does their rehearsals I thought I’d get clearance, thanks to Mr. Prenter, he allowed me to come and see her.”

Bloody hell of course Paul would play a part in this. He’s always hated (y/n) hanging around, talking about her like she was a distraction from the band.  Of course (y/n) never took anything lying down.

Much like Roger, hell in fact all her life when she needed and wanted to, she could be a right up trickster.  Her pranks were always over the top but brilliantly planned and well executed.  

I would know because I was unfortunately a victim to some of those pranks, but then again I also helped form some of those pranks on say like heart-breaking, back-stabbing boyfriends, stab in the back best friends, you know those types of people.

I then left the booth and tried to find (y/n).  I searched and searched but I couldn’t find her anywhere, that was until I heard sniffling from the janitor’s closet.

I pressed my ear against the door and I knew without a doubt that (y/n) was behind the door.  I lightly knocked on it and she stopped crying and choked out.

“Please go away.” I knew words wouldn’t convince her to come out, so I did the next best thing that always seemed to at least put a smile on her face, even when I couldn’t see it.

I went into the next room and managed to find some paper and a pen and I raced back towards the janitor’s closet and wrote something down on the paper before sliding it under the door.

*My POV*

How could she? How could she suddenly decide to show up after all these years? How the hell did she even find me?  I kept crying all alone in the janitor’s closet, having the broom against the handle so that no one could come in.  I heard a knock so I just told whoever it was to go away.

I heard footsteps walking away so I figured they got the message, but then I heard footsteps again and then something was tossed underneath the crack of the door.  It was a piece of paper.  I slowly crawled up halfway out of my spot to grab the sheet of paper and unfolded it to see a very familiar little rhyme.

Oh won’t you come out little Dale.

Don’t you weep and tell me your tale.

Deacy.  Whenever I was so upset that I would hide away in either a closet or under the sink, he’d always write me a silly but comforting note that always first opened with those two lines.

Sometimes that was all it took for me to open the door and talk to him, other times we’d just pass notes back and forth between the door until I was ready to come out. Since there wasn’t a writing utensil at all in here, I was forced to remove the broom and slowly open the door.

The first thing I saw his hand being held out for me to take. I slowly reached my hand out from the door and took his hand.  He always knew that whenever I got this upset to never push me.  I felt his thumb rub and stroke over the top of my hand, his other fingers gently intertwining with my own in various different ways trying to give me the best comfort he could till I finally had the courage to come out.

Finally I opened up the closet.

I immediately hugged Deacy and he hugged me back and I whimpered out.

“I’m sorry I pulled a Roger move.”

“Shhhh. It’s alright my little nightingale. Unlike Roger’s temper tantrum over a strange car song, you have a better excuse. I’m so sorry love I had no idea it would be her.”

“I know you didn’t have anything to do with this. It’s just—”

“No I know. I know. Believe me love, I gave her a piece of my mind after all these years. All for you.”

“Why couldn’t you have been my real brother Deacy?” he softly laughed and said as he stroked through my hair.

“I may be your cousin by blood (n/n). But to me you’ve always been the sister I’ve always wanted. And that’ll never change, you hear me?” he cupped my face into his hands. He wiped my tears as I nodded and hugged him, burying my face into his shoulder.  “We’ll get through this together dove, just like we’ve always done.”

Days passed and Deacy made sure that if my mum came anywhere near me trying to start a conversation, either he or the lads would come in and save me with a ‘task’ to do, just to spare me more agony and pain, especially since she kept coming over to the studio every day and was always in the same room as I was in.

However one day when guys all had to record their parts for a new song, I was looking at all my photos when I heard her voice say.

“(Y/n)?” I froze and turned around to see my mum standing there, blocking my only exit.  I stood up and said.

“Stay away from me!”

“Please just hear me out, please! Give me 2 minutes.” I looked down at my watch and said.

“1.58” telling her that her time was ticking.

“I know that—I haven’t been the best mother. After your father left us I thought I could do well by you but I guess I was wrong. I never left you because I didn’t love you, I left you because I loved you too much to put you in what I was living under. I could barely keep the mortgage on the house, we would’ve been homeless. I couldn’t do that to you. I thought that by leaving you with my sister, you’d get a better chance. Much more than you could have with me.”

“Then why didn’t you visit me? Why didn’t you call?” I asked as tears filled my eyes.

“I was a mess I—I got into some serious trouble and had to try and work them out. If they found out I had a child, then they’d use you against me. I couldn’t let them do that. But I do have something to show you,” she dug into her purse and pulled out a photograph.  She walked up to me and held it out for me. “Look at this picture, just look at it.”

I looked between her and the picture until I finally took it and turned it over and was shocked to see what the picture was.

It was a picture of me at my secondary school decathlon.  It was the championship competition and I had gotten the last question correct which made our school the first time in decades win a decathlon.

“You—you were there?”

“Yes, you were always such a clever girl, I knew if anyone could get your school the win it’d be you.”  I just stared at her in shock, even though I hadn’t seen her since I was a child, she still was there watching over me. “I—I got more pictures like that in the apartment that I’m stay at, if you’d like you could come over and see them.”

“Really?” she nodded with a soft smile.  “And I was also wondering that after you’re done with work, do you—wanna get a drink or something? Coffee? Do you like coffee?”

“I love coffee.” I said.

“Great, I know this one coffee shop in downtown.”

And for the first time, I was starting to slowly reforge a bond with my mother.

As the weeks passed and the two of us got to know each other a little more, hanging out after work, going to the clubs, and going to the mall shopping for clothes.  Of course I had to buy them but hell we were using Deacy’s card and he didn’t seem to mind at all.  So long as we didn’t go crazy and spend all his hard-earned money at once.

And true to her word, my mum did in fact have pictures of almost all my main important events that have happened in my life. My first swim team competition, my school play freshman year, even my high school graduation.

Every important even, she was there.

One day she had came over to Deacy and Veronica’s place and we were both sitting on the couch. The two of us laughing and looking at all of the photos I’ve taken since I’ve been with the guys, explaining each and every picture.

“There us at Rockfield farm studios, Roger was messing around with the chickens, which I told him not to, then next thing he knew the rooster was chasing after him for over 15 minutes.”

“Wow, I must say these are probably the best taken pictures I’ve seen, you’ve really got a gift.”

“Yeah, Deacy says that all the time.” She sat there silent and she said.

“Hey how do you feel about road trips?” I looked at her and said.

“You’re looking at someone whose toured with the biggest band all over the world. A simple road trip wouldn’t hurt me. You—really mean it? You and me?”

“If you’re interested. Just you and me poppet.”

“I am…..mum.” She smiled and for the first time in a very long time, my mum embraced me.  I smiled and wrapped my arms around her and hugged her back.

“We’ll go first thing in the morning.” She told me and I nodded.

*John’s POV*

Seeing (y/n) hugging Kathrine like that made me feel so on edge.  In fact this entire time she’s been here I’ve felt this sickening feeling that history was going to repeat itself.

“Deacy?” I turned to see Brian standing behind me.  I had invited the lads over for supper and just so that way Katherine would be outnumbered should she try anything.

“If you’re going to tell me to stop spying on them, you might as well leave now.”

“You know—maybe she’s really trying to change. Maybe she did try to come back and patch things up with (y/n).” I turned to him and snarled out.

“She had 15 years to do that, don’t you think if she really cared about her own daughter she’d have come sooner?”

“I know Deacy and I’m not jumping to any conclusions yet but, from what I’ve seen so far. (Y/n) seems to really want to be with her mother. Maybe you could try to let go of the past and see that Katherine is seemingly wanting to change. At least do it for (y/n).”

“Everything I do is for her. I just—I just don’t want to see her get hurt again. For three years when she was first dropped off at my home, she always asked me ‘when’s mummy coming back?’ At the end of the three years by the time I was a teenager I just snapped and told her that she abandoned her. I felt awful in the way I had to explain it, took me over a week to finally get her to talk back to me. And I don’t know what’ll happen if she tries to leave her again.”

“I know mate, I know.” Brian wrapped an arm around me trying to get me to cheer up as I watched with a heavy heart as Katherine and (y/n) were planning out their summer road trip.

It was early the next morning, I woke up to the sounds of Robert getting fussy and felt Veronica stir beside me.

“I’ve got him love.”

“But you took care of him last time.”

“For you my darling, I would always take care of our children if it meant you could still sleep.” I kissed her temple down to her neck before getting up and heading over to Robert’s room.  “Alright my boy, what’s going on with you hmm?” I picked him up and he babbled.

“Hungwy dada.” Since Robert couldn’t quite get his R’s right they always sounded like w’s.  I smiled and said as I picked him up and held him in my arms.

“Okay buddy, what shall it be today hmm? Cheese on toast?”

“No yucky dada.”

“How dare you! Cheese on toast is a wonderful dish, you take that back mister man.” I teased as I began to tickle his sides making him laugh.  He squirmed in my hold and that’s when I saw the silhouette of aunt Katherine walking down the stairs.

I narrowed my eyes and peeked out of Robert’s bedroom door and swore I saw a suitcase in her hand. I told Robert to go over to our room and stay with his mum while I went down to see just exactly she thought she was doing.  

I silently walked down the stairs and saw her with the suitcase and she was about to grab her purse when I stopped her and said.

“Going out shopping again, Katherine?” she froze in her spot and turned around towards me and said.

“John I—I didn’t expect to see you up so early; I would’ve thought the tour exhausted you out.”

“Oh it did, but then again when my child needs me I’m always there for them. So where is it to this time?”

“Actually it’s not what you think. Work called in and I’ve got to check in on some things.”

“And what about the big road trip you and (y/n) had planned? Hmm? Were you going to let her in on your business?” I snapped.

“I was actually going to have you tell her for me.” She said.  I rolled my eyes and turned away from her shaking my head.

“I knew it.” I muttered.

“Excuse me?”

“You almost had me convinced. Almost I mean you finally convinced (y/n) but not anymore! I knew you could never change. You abandoned her once before and I knew that if you ever came back into her life again, you’d do it all over again!” My voice raising up louder and angrier than I ever thought I could go.

“John?” Veronica soon came down with Robert in her arms and the lads were right behind her as well, probably hearing my yelling.

“Jeez Deaks its barely 7 o’clock, what the hell is with all the yelling?” Questioned Roger.

“Katherine’s leaving (y/n) again.” I stated.  They all turned to her and Veronica said.

“Is this true Katherine?”

“And it gets better, she’s wanting me to tell (y/n) the road trip they both planned out together is cancelled instead of telling her herself.” I made sure to point out.

“It’s just business Veronica dear, if you were in my shoes you’d do the same. I promise I’ll keep better in touch this time.”

“Took you 15 years just to get back in touch.” I said. Seeing the look on my wife’s and my friends’ faces they finally got to see what I had seen all those years ago. From what I had told them, now they finally got to see it.  Veronica holding our son walked up to her and said.

“Katherine, if you walk out of (y/n)’s life now…..don’t you ever come back.” With that she walked back up the stairs passing the guys.  All was silent before I spoke up.

“May I have a moment alone with her?” I could already feel the tension from them.  I knew the guys were just as angry as I was because they cared for (y/n) as much as I did, even after knowing her after just 3 years. I heard them walk away until finally it was just Katherine and I in my front hallway. “Sit down.”

“I don’t have time for this John—”

“I said sit down Katherine!” I snapped as I finally turned back towards her and just saw her back as her hand was on the doorknob ready to walk out.  She sighed heavily and walked right past me and sat down on the living room couch.

I walked over toward her and sighed heavily and finally spoke my mind.

“You know; (y/n) was doing just fine until you showed up. But now that you’re back, you have responsibility for her.”

“Look I came back for her—”

“Oh bull. BULLSHIT!!” I yelled at her. “(Y/n) is not some purse that you hang up on a rack and then pick her up whenever you’re ready to use it. Her life goes on! She’s not supposed to be there for you, you’re supposed to be there for her!”

“You get off my back! YOU THINK I WANTED THIS?! IT JUST HAPPENED!!!” She yelled at me as she stood up.  Her breathing was sharp and heavy as she tried to explain her reasoning, “After Derek left, I tried my best but it was just too much and I—”

“CUT THE RUBBISH! ALRIGHT! CUT IT!! Cause I’ve been there! But I didn’t run out on Veronica. I was there for her every day because that’s what a real parent does.”

“A real parent!? Fine. Then you’re a better father than my good-for-nothing man was. Hell John you must be better than any man in the world must be! The one in a million golden boy!” She cheered sarcastically. I shook my head at her and turned away from her. “Now are you going to tell (y/n) or not?”

“I’m not gonna do your dirty work for you.”

“Fine. I’ll—I’ll call her from the road then.”

“Yeah you do that.”

“I will.” She then walked out and that’s when we both heard (y/n)’s voice call out.

“Mummsy.” Katherine stopped in her tracks as (y/n) stood in front of me setting her bags down as she said, “You ready to head out?” Katherine turned towards (y/n) and put on that fake persona act and said as she walked up towards her.

“(Y/n) love glad I caught you. Umm…..some business came up that I gotta handle, so we’re gonna have to put our—trip on hold. You understand right?” (Y/n) was silent for a moment before she finally said.

“Yeah, yeah I understand.”

“Oh that’s great, I promise you I had no intention of having this come up.”

“No yeah I understand.”

“And it’ll only just be for a couple of weeks….well maybe even longer.”

“I get it, it’s fine. It’s fine.”

“Look I’ll call you next week and we’ll iron out the details then, okay?” (Y/n) nodded.

I could tell from the second she got the news that (y/n) was heartbroken and I feared that she knew Katherine’s real reason for leaving.  She tried to pull off an understanding smile and voice but I could hear the cracks in her voice.

“It was great seeing you again poppet.” Katherine said as she reached out to her but (y/n) shrugged her off as she said.

“You too—Katherine.” She spat out her own mother’s name icily as she stared right at her.  Katherine knowing that she had lost her only child once more, sighed solemnly and left without another word, turning her back on (y/n) once more.

“I’m sorry love.” I heard a choked out laugh and that’s when (y/n) said.

“No this actually works out perfectly I mean with the tour about to resume I can get back to practicing before University starts and—”

“(N/n), you don’t have to pretend around me. It’s okay to be angry.” I assured her.

“Mad? Why should I be mad Deacy? I mean at least she said goodbye this time, right? Hell at least this time you won’t have to hear me complain ‘when’s mummy coming home?’ I’m not 4 years old anymore, I can handle it. I—just wish I didn’t waste my damn time building this fucking scrapbook!” She then pulled out from her bag a photo album and glued onto the cover was a recent picture of her and Katherine together.

With all the pictures she’s taken over the years, (y/n)’s other hobby included scrapbooking.  I saw that it had been completed decorated and detailed, almost like a professional had made it.  She set it down on the table and just glared down at it.

I slowly walked up to her but kept to her space because I knew it was only a matter of time before she would break down and I didn’t want to overwhelm her.

“Darling, you know that if there was anything I could do to make this better—”

“No, no, no, no this works out for the best,” she said as she came up to me looking me right in the eye. “I mean it’s her loss anyway I mean I learned how to ride a bike by myself. Yeah sure the boys laughed at me but I got back up and showed them a thing or two about riding didn’t I?”

“Yes you did love bug.” I said with a fond smile remembering that day.

“And there was a hell of a lot of stuff I did without her. I learned how to shave, how to drive, I got over my first crush and date without her, I did prom without her, I had fifteen great birthdays without her! That bitch never even sent me a damn card. TO HELL WITH HER!!!” She turned and screamed at the door.

God she’s always tried to remain so optimistic about life and everything around her. Always tried to remain strong after being abandoned by both parents, she always tried to go on every day with a smile and a laugh but now she was finally letting all that pain out like a dam bursting.

Hearing her sharp breaths and the tremble in her voice just broke my heart.

“I never needed her then, and I’ll never need her now.” She snapped as she walked away.  I softly spoke her name as I reached out and touched her arm.  That’s when she turned around and said.

“Nah you know what Deacy? I’m gonna get through college without her. I’ll get my dream job without her. I’ll find me a good guy to be with, and then I’m going to have a whole bunch of kids. I’m gonna be a better mother than she ever was because there’s not a fucking thing she can teach me ABOUT HOW TO LOVE A CHILD!!!”

Her eyes were red from the tears pooling in her eyes and her face morphed from pure rage to brokenhearted with a snap of a finger.  It was almost like she had de-aged right before my eyes and was back to being that three year old girl that I once held in my arms whenever she cried about her parents.

“Why didn’t they want me?” At this point I couldn’t hold back anymore.

I immediately wrapped my arms around her and held her as close and as tightly as I could as I felt her wet my shoulder with her tears.  Her sobs pierced the room as I felt her go limp against me.  The two of us slowly collapsed to our knees but not once did I let my grip on her go loose.  I kept hold of her as I rubbed her back and whispered words of love and comfort in her ear.

*3rd Person POV*

Unaware that in behind the door that led to the dining room, Freddie, Roger and Brian stayed and overheard the entire conversation.  And overhearing their favorite girl break down like this, broke all their hearts.  Freddie wiped away his tears that were flooding down his face, almost ready to break down the door and just hug his little camera girl.

Brian who standing behind Freddie had a hand on his shoulder but he too had tears streaming down his face.  While Roger who was had pulled up one of the dining room chairs just a couple inches away from Fred, his back turned towards the door.

He was a mix between pure anger and heartbreak.  He wa tempted to knock over the china cabinet but also just break down into tears at hearing his partner in crime cry this much.  Never had he heard her make those sounds before and it just hurt him to the core.

Back with John and (y/n), she had finally managed to cry herself to sleep.  Deacy slowly picked her up bridal style when the guys decided to come into the living room and the second John saw their red, teary eyes, he knew that they had stayed and overheard everything.

“You heard it all I assume?” John asked more as a statement than a question.

“We didn’t mean to impose John.” Said Brian.

“It’s fine, beats having to tell you guys and having her relive that pain and exhausting myself to repeat the same story.” He said as he looked down at his little cousin. Roger came up towards Deacy and stroked (y/n)’s head.

“The poor dear” Freddie said solemnly.

“Guess you were right about her Deacy.” Brian said.

“There will be plenty of time for ‘I told you so’s’ later, right now I should get (y/n) back into her room so she can get the proper rest she needs.” Deacy then took his cousin upstairs and placed her back in her bed.

He tucked her in and brushed away the hair from her face and lightly kissed her forehead before leaving her room to head back downstairs.

As time went on and it was around late afternoon the guys were still hanging around John’s place, agreeing to stay until (y/n) woke up so that the five of them could have a talk. Veronica who was currently walking up the stairs to check up (y/n) muttered to herself.

“Oh I hope she’s okay.” She got to the door and lightly knocked on it and said, “(Y/n), (y/n) love it’s Veronica, may I come in?” She heard nothing.  She knocked again and said, “(Y/n)?” when she didn’t get a response, she opened the door to see a shocking sight.

The bedsheets had been turned over and the bedroom window was open, the curtains blowing with the wind.

“Oh no, John!” she cried out as she raced back down the stairs.  The boys heard footsteps running down the stairs and when they saw Veronica, the first thing they saw was her frantic state.  John immediately went up to his wife holding her arms and said.

“Love calm down, what’s going on?”

“(Y/n)’s is missing.”

“What? What do you mean missing?!” demanded Roger.

“I went to check on her but when I opened the door she wasn’t in her room. The window was open and—” without getting another word, the four bandmates raced up the stairs to see that Veronica was telling the truth.  She came up behind them as Deacy and Brian raced towards the window and looked down.

“She must’ve scaled down using the pipes along the house.” Suggested Brian.

“My darlings, her bag is gone.” Freddie stated as he stood by the closet and sure enough the bags that she had used for the upcoming road trip were gone.

“She could be anywhere by now.” Brian said but then I snapped.

“She could be out of the country for all we know because we don’t know how long she’s been gone for!”

“Deacy calm down.” Roger said.

“I swear if anything happens to that girl, I’ll never forgive myself.”

“Don’t worry darling we’ll find her.” Fred assured me as he placed a hand on my shoulder.  “We’ll turn London upside down if we have too to find her.”

We then split up into teams.  I called my mum first to take care of Robert and watch over him then once she took care of him Veronica and I checked in the square, Fred took the studio, and Brian and Roger took the park.

It was an endless search trying to find her, and I pray to God we find her alive.  It would be dark soon and all the freaks and psychopaths love to come out at night.

*3rd Person POV*

It was hours into the search and sunset would soon be near and still no one had found any signs of (y/n).  After search the studio, Fred decided to help Brian and Roger in the park while Deacy and Veronica tried the mall, hoping that maybe (y/n) had gone inside since it was getting dark soon.

Fred and Brian teamed up together to search one side of the park while Roger was near by the lake searching on his own.  It was then he took notice of something underneath the bridge nearby.  He quickly ran towards the bridge and low and behold he had found (y/n).

She was huddled under the bridge, her knees tucked in close to her body sniffling softly. Roger took notice of the tearstains on her face and he felt his heart break once more.  He cautiously approached her and knelt down beside her and softly said her name.

*My POV*

I sniffled and felt more tears run down my face.  I thought that I had finally found a place to cry in peace without risking anyone coming near me and asking questions when I heard the familiar soft, spoken voice of Roger Taylor say my name.  I jumped up but then groaned and turned my back on him.

“Oh god…..”

“You know you really gotta pick your hiding spots. I mean seriously you have no idea how many people could see you—”

“Why are you here Roger?!” I snapped.

“We’ve been scouring the entire town looking for you (n/n). You gave us all quite a scare.” He said. I didn’t respond to him, just scooted as far away from him as I could and put my bag between us giving me that extra space I needed. “You wanna talk?”

“There’s nothing to talk about. My dad never wanted me, my mum never wanted me, nobody ever wants me.”

“That’s not true—”

“Open your eyes Roger!” I snapped at him as I felt a new wave of tears hit me.  “All my life I’ve had to hear all my friends telling me what great parents they have. You know my dad fought in Vietnam, my mom’s a real estate’s agent. My parents help support me. Well—both my parents never wanted me! Yeah I had Deacy and aunt Lillian but they are just my cousin and aunt. It’s not the same! My whole life I had to be loved by someone whose not my parent and I hate it! I hate it soo much!” I lowered my head choking on my sobs.

It was then I felt Roger’s arms wrap around me and I felt him place my head over his heart, each beat of his heart trying to soothe my tormented mind.  He stroked down my hair and he said.

“Do you remember back on Ridge farm when Brian took us all out to that one area of woods to see the stars? Paul forced himself into the getaway, so to mess with him you filled his bag with rocks and used that lizard you came across to put on his bottle as well as on his head.”

“And then it crawled into his mouth.” I finished.

“Yeah pure stroke of genius.” He chuckled. “(N/n), you may think you’re unloved, but that is absolute bollocks. You are loved. By Deacy, Brian, Fred, me, Veronica, hell even Miami. We all love you, and if anything had happened to you, we wouldn’t know what to do.” He wiped the tearstains away from my cheek with his thumb before lifting my chin up to face him, forcing me to stare into his baby blue eyes.  “The only one who doesn’t deserve to be loved and wanted is your mother. Anyone who could play you like that, has no right to be called a parent. You are way out of her league.”

“Then why would she come back pretending to care?” Roger just looked at me sadly and he said.

“I wish I had the right answer. But I can tell you this; you’re sweet, you’re kind, smart, beautiful. You’ve got more sass in one finger than Deacy will ever have in his entire body. And it’s like you said one day in the way off deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep.” I laughed softly as he kept repeating the word deep at least four more times before continuing, “distant future, you’ll become a mother yourself and I know that you’ll be twice the mother than your own was.” He tucked some of my hair behind my ears, revealing them before gently cupping my chin between his thumb and index fingers.

“How is it that a dentist ends up being wiser than both the astrophysicist and electrical engineer?”

“I was never a dentist and you know it.” He said as he playfully squeezed the tip of my nose shaking my head which made me laugh again as I pushed his hand away making him laugh softly.  He then leaned forward and placed his forehead against mine.

This was a special little thing that Roger loved to do with me. It was our own secret little comforting mechanism.  I was actually the first one to do it to him when he once had a breakdown after a show. He just seemed so peeved about something that the lads almost feared that he’d throw out another telly set. So I took the risk and took his hands in mine and just placed my forehead against his and just held that position till he calmed down.

From then on, whenever one of us was mad or upset, the forehead touch helped bring the other back to Earth.  He then wrapped his arms around me giving me his famous bear hugs.  His hand stroked down my hair as his head now moved next to mine while my head rested against his shoulder and the two of us sat there for a while in silence.

“C’mon kid, let’s get you home.”

“I don’t think I can.” I muttered sadly.

“Why’s that?”

“Deacy.” I simply answered.  Roger separated from me and he said.

“He’s not mad (y/n)…..”

“You don’t get it, you may have seen John Deacon the man who can crumble you down with just two sentences, but you’ve yet to see what happens when he redirects that anger and mixes it with overprotective behavior.”

“Love, he’s been worried sick about you. He needs to know that his little sis is safe. I know I would.” I sighed heavily and said.

“But what if he does get mad?”

“I’ll talk to him. If anyone knows a thing about overreacting it’s me.” I smiled softly and that’s when Rog stood up and held his hand out for me to take.

“You promise to have my back?”

“Partners in crime till the very end. Just like those two cats in that poem you like so much.” I smiled up at him and took his hand and he helped me up as he took my bag over his shoulder and had his free arm wrapped around my shoulder as he guided me back to his car and he drove me back to Deacy and Veronica’s.

*3rd Person POV*

The sun had set about 5 minutes ago and with almost everyone back at John’s place, no one had found her.  John who was running his hands through his hair frantic with worry as his wife tried to calm him down.

“Maybe we should call the police.” Suggested Brian.

“No need Brian.” Roger’s voice soon spoke up as he opened the door.  Everyone turned to see that the drummer had finally came back.

“And just where were you all this time Roger dear?”

“Bringing back a lost lamb.” He then gestured with his arm and soon walking in cautiously was (y/n). Immediately everyone began crowding around her asking her questions about where she was and why she ran away like that.

Sensing his partner in crime’s nervousness and anxiety he told everyone.

“Guys, guys back it up. Don’t crowd her all at once.” John who merely stood there by the couch in shock to see his cousin alive and well.  Roger looked to Deacy and pressed his hand to (y/n)’s back. She looked up at him and he nodded to her and she cautiously walked towards her cousin, like a dog with its tail tucked between its legs.

“Where did you find her?” asked Freddie.

“At the park underneath the Churchill bridge. Poor girl was crying her eyes out.” Roger whispered.  Veronica ten decided to allow her husband and (y/n) to have some alone time so she guided the boys into the kitchen for a proper meal after their long search while she called Lilian to tell her that they found (y/n) and that she would pick Robert up in the morning.

(Y/n) stood in front of her cousin.  John looked down at her before finally raising his hands to cup both sides of her face to lift her face up so that he could get a good look at her.

“You’re not hurt are you?” he asked.  With a shake of her head, Deacy sighed with relief and immediately embraced her before openly weeping into her shoulder.  She hugged her cousin back whimpering.

“I’m sorry I ran away. I’m sorry Deacy, I’m sorry.”

“Shhhh, you’re home now. Safe and unharmed and that’s all I care about now. It’ll be okay. We’ll be okay dove.” The two cousins kept hold of each other trying to draw strength from each other knowing that they were going to get by and be okay.

[sphynxe]

thanks so much thy and lau for tagging me @chaoticvamp and @moondrunkdevil you are both way too cool to be friends with me but i love hearing from you and i was so happy to read yours!!!

rules: answer 17 questions and tag 21 blogs

nickname: m

starsign: pisces sun & leo moon

height: 5′8?

last film i watched: stranger than fiction

favourite musician: so hard!! everyone knows i love mx and jooheon lol. talking musicianship and not just all around fave musical artist i rly love gabrielle aplin & nina nesbitt rn

song stuck in my head: x-phenomenon (u already know)

other blogs: none. lately i’ve been thinking about making another personal blog that’s less memey and more arty or w/e but idk how it would pan out bc frankly i’m meme trash! and have never once tried to compartmentalize any of my evolving interests on this site! you’re all welcome!!!! (where’s that text post that’s like “behold, the collage of me”)

do I get asks: occasionally and i appreciate it

blogs following: 266 atm

what am I wearing: grey sweatpants and pink t-shirt (we goin ✈️ comfy town)

dream job: ben & jerry’s test-taster

dream trip: would love to go to kyoto. would love to road trip the u.s. east coast in fall and see the leaves

play any instruments: just what little i remember from piano as a kid (so no! lol)

languages: english and mandarin

favourite food: soup dumplings?? fried rice?? spaghetti?? fries & shake?? would probs have to be some kind of comfort food like that

favorite song: ??!?!?!! maybe keane - somewhere only we know or athlete - black swan song.... or might have to be an old poppy fave from like leona or sth.... or i have a lot of sentimental faves of mx like need u and by your side.... (you thought i wouldn’t try to cop out on ALL these questions???)

random fact: hairless sphynx cats have to be bathed at least once a week (oh you meant a fact about me?)

tagging: the rules said to tag 21 blogs and i was like dang do i even know that many people and the answer is no but what’s up @korimi4 @wonbebegom @showbebe @wonsheon @schocolateymenta @lamptastical @w0ndi @gustingirl @lovwonho @hyungwonjenner @23rosee 

[empresstress13]

10 Questions

Tagged by the amazing @bearly-tolerable to answer her ten questions and to make up ten separate questions to ask others. Thank you!

1. Do you have a favorite song? Why?

... Probably not, because in general I’m bad at answering “favorite” questions, and in specific THERE IS TOO MUCH AMAZING MUSIC. YOU CANNOT EXPECT ME TO PICK JUST ONE. I CAN’T EVEN PICK A FAVORITE ARTIST.

Off the top of my head some favorite musical artist include: Amano Tsukiko, Acid Black Cherry, Myrkur, Loreena McKennitt, Florence + the Machine, Vienna Teng, Kagrra, Shakira, Theatre of Tragedy, Rihanna, Of Monsters And Men . . . . various Musical soundtracks. . .   

2. Who is your favorite fictional character?

See above: I’m not good at choosing favorites. XD ummm. . . .Ok. I will say that my first truly beloved fictional character was Princess Leia Organa hands down! I saw Star Wars when I was five, and was Leia the next Halloween and watched the movie at least once a week for several years.Recently I was able to cosplay Leia Organa and I had SO much fun! 

3. Spring, Summer, Fall or Winter?

Fall!

4. What is your hidden talent?

um. I don’t know. XD 

I sing a bit? I can play the harp? I use to bellydance? I have hyper-extendable joints in my fingers? Wait,I don’t think the last one is a talent .. . 

5. If you had to choose 1 material possession to save forever, what would it be?

eeeeeh. . . . I don’t know. Maybe a book? But even then. . . I just don’t know. Like. . .. I own stuff. I like my stuff. I probably own too much stuff, but in the end. . . it’s just stuff? 

6. What are you most proud of?

hmmm. . .I don’t know. I don’t often feel very proud of myself. Or sometimes I do, but it kind of comes and goes and isn’t very consistent. . . 

7. Do you like animals? If so, what’s your fave?

Yes! um. . . .I like lots of different animals, but probably magpies, wolves, or deer? Unless you meant something that is a normal pet? Then probably dogs! 

8. Do you like rain?

Yes! Generally speaking, unless I’m already cold or stuck outside in the rain when I don’t want to be. 

9. What do you do to cheer up when you’re sad?

I listen to music I like. Sing or dance along. I call my mom or a friend. I eat something yummy. Sometimes I play video games. Sometimes I just sit down a take a moment to breath.

10. Who is your fave Dragon Age character and why?

I. . . I . . . please don’t . I can’t. XD Ppppppprobably Merrill. . . . but it’s soooo close. 

New Questions (I’m re-using questions from other tag games but tagging new people?):

1. Going on a trip to 3 locations! ANY 3 locations! Choose your locations!

2. On said trip you are choosing 3 people to travel with! ANY 3 people! Choose your companions! 

3. What music do you listen to when you are in a good mood? Is it different than the music you listen to when you are sad?   

4. What do you think the “perfect” weather is?

5. In adventure/ fantasy RPG type games, what class of character do you normally play? (Or what would you play? fighter? mage?)

6. What is your favorite beverage? 

7. Would you rather fight 1 dragon-sized nug or 100 nug-sized dragons? (if anyone I tagged is unsure of what a nug is: it’s like a hairless guinea pig? from Dragon Age?)

8. What is your preferred sleep schedule? Do you manage to get that?

9. What is your favorite sweet?

10. Give me an interesting fact! Can be about you or about something you find interesting! Please and thank you! :) 

tagging: @buttsonthebeach , @katalyna-rose , @fadedforyou , @shift-shaping , @smuttine, @deleriumofyou, @roguelioness, @lycheejellytea, @solverne, @dragynfox

Feel free to ignore! Only do this if you have the time and/or inclination. :) Love y’all! 

[hale-of-stiles-heart]

College!AU 7 minutes of heaven ?

Here we have some self-indulgent nerdy!Cas and jock!Dean who’s actually a huge sweetheart! (also on ao3)

Castiel was going to kill his brothers. He was going to slit their throats, eviscerate them, and burn their bodies just for fun. Right after he got out of the closet they had locked him.

He banged his fist against the door again. As expected, there was no response from either Gabriel or Balthazar, the fucking bastards. Trying again, he growled, "Gabriel! Let me out of here!"

"No can do, baby bro," Gabriel's sing-song voice sounded through the door, slightly muffled yet full of glee. "It hasn't even been a minute yet!"

"Let me out!" Castiel hissed, desperation bleeding into his voice. Smacking his palm against the door hard enough to make it tremble on its hinges, he snarled, "I'm gonna kick both of your asses!"

"Oh, please, Cassie. You couldn't kick your own ass," Balthazar scoffed from the other side of the door. Castiel could perfectly envision his brother's eye roll as he reported, in his smarmy accent, "Now, just enjoy your time with the hairless ape and send me a fruit basket later for my efforts."

"Give it up, dude," another voice instructed, this one much closer than Gabriel and Balthazar's. "They're not letting us out till our seven minutes are up."

Castiel let out a huff, pushing his glasses further up his nose, a habit of his exacerbated by stress and anxiety both of which he had in spades thanks to his siblings. Crossing his arms over his chest, Castiel narrowed his eyes at his closet cell mate.

In the low light of the closet, he could just barely make out Dean's defined features. He could see the firm, sharp line of Dean's jaw, the disheveled mess of his not quite light brown not quite dirty blonde hair, the soft plush pink of his bottom lip.

His shoulders were so wide he almost had to hunch them just to fit into the closet they had been unceremoniously shoved into. His gray Guns N' Roses t-shirt was stretched tight across his chest and biceps, half of the latter on full, unabashed display.

Cas shifted awkwardly, dipping his chin and staring down at his hands as he fiddled with the hem of his own t-shirt. He raised his head, snapping his eyes up to Dean's, when Dean grunted, "What's your problem, dude?"

Castiel's problem was that twenty eight years ago his father had decided to have another child, a son named Gabriel who made it his mission in life to torment his younger siblings. Well, that wasn't entirely true. There was only one younger sibling Gabriel tormented. Castiel.

Why, Castiel didn't know, especially since Gabriel had an unusually large pool of younger siblings to pick from. But ever since he could remember, Gabriel had been a thorn in his side, a thorn he loved dearly but a thorn nonetheless.

Balthazar, who was two years younger than Gabriel and six years older than Castiel, had followed in his brother's footsteps and devoted his life to ruining Castiel's. It was a family business, apparently.

When Castiel was in junior high school, his older brothers had wrapped every single thing in his room in sparkly gold wrapping paper. And he meant everything. Every last pen, book, and article of clothing he had opened had to be unwrapped.

In high school, they had broken into the school in the middle of the night and filled his locker with glitter. For the next two years of high school, he had still been finding glitter in his textbooks and spiral notebooks.

Now, in his junior year of college, his older brothers had locked him in a closet with the guy he'd had a crush on for months. Because, as he'd said, his brothers were assholes and took advantage of his weakness for vodka to question him about the identity of his mysterious, pathetic crush.

When Gabriel and Balthazar had learned it was none other than Dean Winchester, resident overconfident, overcompensating butch jock, they'd had a field day. The teasing had seemed endless, full of jokes about Cas falling for a textbook example of a closet case and actual ballads written about the dorky English Literature major falling for the cocky football player.

Castiel had met Dean in his music class, an elective that would count as an art class. Balthazar had suggested that he take a music class rather than a visual art class since he was already a rather good painter, encouraging Castiel to learn a new skill.

Dean had caught his attention the second he walked into the room, sauntering in with half-lidded eyes and a lazy smirk. Castiel had been so captivated by Dean's good looks that he hadn't even noticed the green eyed man had taken a seat beside him and introduced himself.

Castiel had belatedly snapped to attention and shaken Dean's hand, introducing himself and trying not to drool at the adorably confused look Dean had given him. Then, he'd had to refrain from sighing dreamily when Dean gave him a nickname, the name Cas sounding so sweet on his lips.

The only thing sweeter was the melody Dean strummed on an acoustic guitar for the class after admitting to their professor that he already knew how to play a few instruments.

Over the rest of the semester, he had gotten to know Dean much better whenever their professor paired them up, Dean more than happy to help Castiel with remembering chords on the guitar. Three months after first meeting the model gorgeous football player, Castiel knew all sorts of things about him: he had a younger brother named Sam; drove a 1967 Chevy Impala; was majoring in automotive technologies so he could work at his family friend Bobby's garage; loved pie more than life itself; and was a proud bisexual despite all of his machismo that screamed 'white straight dude'.

But even knowing that Dean was in fact attracted to men, Castiel had no delusions about Dean having any interest in him. Dean was extremely out of his league, in a whole other world, with his rugged handsomeness and brilliant mind.

He had told his brothers as much since they were complete assholes, they had taken it upon themselves to drag Castiel to each and every one of Dean's football games. Castiel had never been one to enjoy sports but he had certainly taken guilty pleasure in watching Dean on the field as his brothers shouted all sorts of obscenities at the opposing team.

They had outright told him that they would never let him live his crush down. Which is why he should have been more suspicious when they both stopped mentioning Dean altogether.

He should have been more suspicious when they announced they were throwing a party at their house. When they invited a bunch of college kids despite the fact that they were both nearing their thirties.

But he hadn't been. Mostly because he had plans to barricade himself in his bedroom with some snacks so he could catch up on Game of Thrones.

Yet, an hour into the party, Gabriel practically carried him out of his bedroom and downstairs to where a crowd of people were drinking from red solo cups and dancing horribly to songs that barely had any lyrics. His grumbling had only been stopped by Balthazar thrusting a cup of vodka into his hand, the liquor mellowing him out a bit.

Enough that he didn't put up any fight when his brothers guided him over to the back room where a group of people were sitting in a circle on the floor, an empty beer bottle in the center of the circle. He was too focused on the fact that Dean was sitting in the circle, wearing a faded GNR shirt and dark jeans, his hair messy and the stubble on his jaw longer than usual.

Castiel had been just buzzed enough to not be suspicious of his brothers, just buzzed enough to completely tune Gabriel out as he explained the rules of the game. He had been too busy gazing at Dean with a dreamy smile on his face, riveted to the way Dean stuck the tip of his tongue out as he spun the empty Heineken bottle.

The next thing he knew, he was being led into the hallway closet with Dean as the others in the circle tittered like a bunch of old biddies. Among the cacophony of sounds from the party, Castiel managed to hear someone mumble a phrase he recognized, "Seven minutes in heaven."

Of course, the words only registered once his brothers locked the closet door, trapping him and Dean inside. Running a hand through his hair, he huffed and answered Dean's question, "My problem is that my brothers are assholes and locked me in a closet."

"Kinda the whole point of seven minutes in heaven, Cas," Dean pointed out, the use of the nickname making a swarm of butterflies take flight in Castiel's stomach. Scratching his jaw, Dean wondered aloud, "Were you even listening?"

Castiel felt himself blush. Rubbing his arm, he stared down at his shoes and reluctantly admitted, "Not really, no. I was a somewhat distracted."

"Oh, really?" Dean hummed, as though Castiel's confession was extremely fascinating. Castiel glanced up out of curiosity, finding Dean taking a few small steps closer, tipping his head to the side to meet Castiel's gaze. "Any reason you were so distracted?"

Castiel froze, his eyes widening as he blinked up at Dean. There was no way Dean could know, right? Castiel was always very careful about not being too obvious with his pathetic pining.

Then again, he'd had enough vodka to make him forget about his inhibitions for just a little while. And he had been doing some intense staring while sitting in that stupid circle.

His worst fears were confirmed when Dean spoke again. A smirk curling his lips, he shifted closer and casually inquired, "Maybe you were staring at someone?"

There was a cocky, teasing note in his voice that made Castiel's blood boil. Yes, he had been gawking at Dean and yes, he had a ridiculous crush on him but Dean didn't have to be such an asshole about it.

He said as much as he glared at Dean, folding his arms over his chest. "Okay, I like you. You happy now?"

"Wasn't expecting you to admit it that easily," Dean commented, raising his brows. He continued inching closer, drifting into Castiel's personal space. Setting his hands on Castiel's hips, he tacked on, "But since you asked... I'm very happy."

With that, he bent his head and kissed Castiel.

Having never been kissed before, much to his brothers' amusement, Castiel had no idea what he was supposed to do. He flailed a little as Dean pressed their lips together in a surprisingly chaste kiss before laying a hand on Dean's upper arm to steady himself.

Dean pulled back a moment later, reopening his eyes with a smile that could only be described as dopey. His brows drew together and he huffed out a laugh, his breath warm against Castiel's lips as he teased, "Never woulda thought you'd be the type to kiss with your eyes open."

Castiel flushed, wishing the floor would open up and swallow him whole so he could escape his embarrassment. Of course, he was supposed to close his eyes while kissing. God, he was such an idiot.

"I'm not the type to kiss. Period," Castiel admitted, lowering his eyes again. When he chanced a look upward, he was greeted by Dean's incredulous expression.

"You've never been kissed before?" Dean asked softly, inexplicable disbelief hushing his voice. When Castiel nodded, Dean blurted, "Really? But you're so cute!"

Castiel was immensely flattered by that, ducking his chin as he bit his bottom lip. He could feel his face flush with heat, thankful for the darkness in the room.

"Oh, shit," he heard Dean curse, the football player taking a step back. Castiel's eyes shot up when Dean apologetically rambled, "Are you ace? Or aro? Are you not into kissing? Shit, I'm sorry, I thought—"

"Dean," Castiel said simply, cutting Dean off before he could apologize for anything else. He tightened his grip on Dean's arm, reeling him in again as he explained, "I've just never had occasion to kiss anyone. I'm not asexual or aromantic."

"Oh," Dean murmured, nodding thoughtfully. It took another second for the apologetic look on his face to melt away into a charming grin as Dean announced, "Well, that's a relief. Because I'd really like to kiss you again."

"What are you waiting for?" Castiel asked, Dean's confession sparking his own boldness. He curled his fingers into the fabric of Dean's sleeve as he whispered, "We have a few more minutes left in heaven."

With that said, he leaned up to kiss Dean, remembering to close his eyes this time. Heaven is right, Castiel thought as Dean eagerly returned the kiss.

Maybe his brothers weren't such assholes after all. He was still going to kick their asses, though.

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