#I just have Disliked The Way I Have Been Treated Recently
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1. Anti-civ does not mean being against medicine. Every culture on the planet practices medicine, and this has been the case for as long as culture has existed. It's true that something like cancer is hard to treat without recent technology, but it's also true that we get a lot more cancer, autoimmune disorders, metabolic issues, etc now. The system that is capable of treating these problems is the same system that causes most of them in the first place.
2. The science thing is more complicated but let's get into what science even is. You can talk about science in the epistemological sense or in the institutional sense. This is definitely something a lot of anti-civ folks would not agree with me on, I'm not going to defend anyone else's opinion here. Speaking personally, my feelings on the scientific method of learning and knowing are messy but I'm not going to toss out empiricism completely. It's good to question beliefs.
Scientific institutions.... are primarily tools of the state. Certainly not all scientists or even the majority spend their time on the kinds of projects I'm talking about. But the reason science as a whole is valued is because it is used to make effective weapons and tools of control. Zooming out a little bit, I don't dislike empiricism itself, but I'm skeptical of the goal of amassing knowledge. This knowledge is part of the wealth of corporate and governmental powers and is far less useful to us than it is to them. Knowledge should be embedded within a living culture, not hoarded to be available as a means.
3. Curious to hear about the good way of making computers? My position is that even if human laborers were happy to work in mines for some reason, the mines would still be doing violence to the land. But for the sake of argument let's say there's a way to do the mining that causes minimal harm to the land. How much work do you think it would take to make one computer ethically? Do you think it would be realistic for very many people to have access to these fantastically complex tools, built in a cleanroom with machines built by machines built by machines built by machines? And again, how much space on our shared earth does this whole apparatus take up?
To be fair, I'd love to not have a phone, so in a better world where I can have a good life without one, that's at least one less that you'd need to make!
4. Which leads me to the basic hypocrisy that anti-civ folks are continually accused of. I actually don't have much of a defense to this one other than that it's difficult to live the life I want to live. I would really really really love to spend most of my time outside or in simply built shelters, never looking at a screen again. I have tried actually and I think the first issue is that it's a goal for a community, not for an individual. The community is by far the most important part and they've been systematically broken. Living alone on foraged food is still just barely possible, but it doesn't resemble the life I dream of. It's only superficially similar. The other point I want to make is that even for a community, it's damn hard to make this work in the world we live in. People are sincerely trying, and often failing, not because it's a bad way to live but because capital and civ culture will not let us. There's also some successes but the success tends to come with a lot of compromise. Still, we gotta keep trying, cause what else can we do?
5. Finally, we get to questions that I think need to be asked and don't have answers I like. How do we get there from here? Billions of people are dependent upon the system we live in functioning well. In short, you are right, there is no way for everyone to transition to non-civilized ways of living. A lot of anti-civ folks don't like to admit that. Some just live in denial and then there's the ones who actually advocate for mass death. Thankfully not that many in my experience but it's still an issue.
I certainly can't speak for anyone else and my views may not be representative of the anti-civ crowd as a whole, it's been so many years since I talked to many other anarchists so I don't know where people are at anymore and I no longer remember a lot from when I was in the scene. But let me try to elaborate a little on where I'm at personally.
I don't see a way for everyone alive now to get out of the machine and not die horribly. But as the godspeed track goes, it's also pretty clear to me that the machine is bleeding to death. It's almost certainly not going stop functioning all at once, but as the decline continues, things are going to get much worse for all of us trapped inside. Meanwhile the land and the waters have been degraded to the point where anyone who tries to escape by "living off the land" is in for a rude awakening. (This completely aside from the basic calculation that not every human would have enough space to feed themselves on our shared earth, even if our ecology was in a better condition.) Not incidentally, colonization of indigenous peoples is ongoing and anyone who remains on their ancestral land is still having to fight back attempts to force them off.
In short, we're pretty fucked. I genuinely do not understand how pro-industrial anarchists or communists think we're going to get out of this one (without mass death). In my opinion it's just as delusional as that section of anti-civ anarchists who are in denial. You can even make similar arguments that if they somehow manage to pull off a revolution, the transition is going to kill a whole lot of people because it's all quite fragile and keeping the machine running smoothly is necessary to forestall immediate catastrophe.
However, I'm actually not that bothered about a hypothetical situation where either pro-industrial ancoms or anti-civ anarchists are in that position. It just doesn't strike me as realistic enough to worry about. I cannot imagine myself ever having to make those sorts of decisions. I'm also not delusional enough to imagine that I could somehow strike at the global industrial system in a way which might bring the whole thing down and thereby cause mass death. Even if I wanted to do that, it's just larping, and I think taking that kind of thing seriously encourages people to develop unhealthy fantasies about something that will never happen. I won't theorize about how anarchists could solve these kinds of issues because it puts us in this mindset that we have to wield absolute power correctly to fix things. That's not how any of this works. The death machine has got us in this horrible position that can not possibly end well, and I can't do anything about that. Obviously don't trust anyone who has ideas about how to design the perfect world for us all to decivilize or whatever, that's completely missing the point and it's depressing how many people do think that way.
So, after all that pessimism, what do I stand for? I just want to live my life. I'd like to say that what I do doesn't have to have a purpose but that's actually not true either. I do feel like I have work to do. I think helping the people in front of me in little ways in really important, but that's not an anti-civ specific thing obviously. Maybe a more relevant thing to add is that we need to put time into the groundwork of living culture. Find ways to relate to other humans and the more than human world, because without that, there's not even a possibility of things being better. A long time ago I used to be all for "tear it down first" but I've more or less done a 180 on that. I live in the USA and right now, if the government and capitalism collapsed instantly for some unforseen reason, almost nobody would be ready to start building a better life. I'm not going to make predictions about the time scale here but I absolutely do believe that global collapse of civilization is happening, and I'm going to live with that in mind. No, it's not possible for everyone to go forage, but there are little things we can do to help heal the places we live. Maybe on the day I'm in need, there will be a fruit on the tree for me in return. The suffering of the world is truly monumental and the good I can do is so small but that makes it feel really important to start working on these things.
Hope you enjoyed the glimpse into some sort of anti-civ perspective, however different it may be from others! There are a lot more people involved in this sort of culture building work than you might think, but you won't hear from most of them since they're out doing the thing. I'm a rare case in that I know some of those people but I'm also online, at least for the moment. Might as well evangelize while I'm here.
Funny thing about that anti civ person is that like. They could just do what folks that live off the grid do, but more extreme. If you hate civilization youâreâŚallowed to live somewhere else. Hell since theyâre so convinced in their own definition of civilization they have even more options! (Though theyâll probably be disappointed to find out first hand their definition was wrong)
I mean in a way I understand. If you truly believe that civilization is the worst thing to happen to humanity and you want the best for humanity, you will even use the tools of civilization to persuade other people to your ideas.
The thing of course is that I don't believe on that and it's so incredibly easy to point out that computers are made by, well, civilization.
I also think that to say "well go live in the woods then" is a bit rude but... honestly, if the anti-civ way of life is more rewarding, we would see more people trying to do it right? We would see people in third-world countries protesting against schools, hospitals, universities, transportation, etc. instead of wanting those, right? But instead you will find, surprisingly, that people want a better life for themselves and those who they love. And this isn't opposed to enviromental stewardship and protection, as it's often the same people who live in those places who also want enviromental protection.
It's often through organized systems, civilization, that people achieve human rights, a good life, and indeed, are able to organize how to protect nature.
It's just completely disconnected from the aspirations of most people.
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ooc rambling in the tags about my personal life that I will delete in a little bit I just need to yell into the void
#â
* OOC / brainrot for a sushi restaurant. )#a large amount of my friends are going to Kill Me#but I just had a very long and emotionally taxing conversation with my girlfriend#which felt great! it was very needed! but ahhgg#I did .... admittedly go into that conversation with the intention to breakup#and like#you know when you see a relationship from the outside and you think you would never stick around in a situation like that#and you don't understand why they would stick around and the person says its because they're in love#its me I'm the insane person#I'm giving things ... one more month to get better#and if they don't I'm done. I swear to god.#its not abusive there's no cheating I need to clarify like. I am safe#I just have Disliked The Way I Have Been Treated Recently
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Donât you love it when petty bitches make complaints to your supervisor
#a chick I used to work with at a previous place complained today to my supervisor about me#apparently I didn't acknowledge her#and I was rude#my supervisor was just like ???#and literally told her 'I've never had any problems with Julisa's customer service'#but obviously given that it was a customer complaint she had to follow it up#which is understandable#it just shits me off cause this chick came through my register one other day recently-ish#and she made no indication of recognising me#so I treated her as I would treat any other customer#I have no idea what I ever did to her to warrant the grudge she seems to hold against me#I've always thought she disliked me cause when she and I worked at the same place I never let her tell me what to do#cause I had been there much longer than she had#so I think that rubbed her the wrong way#especially since I am much younger than her#it just sucks man#I just wonder what her aim was?#like is she that petty that she wants me to lose my job?#I don't understand#on the plus side she apparently told my supervisor that my mum is lovely lmao#which is true#real life shenanigans#julisa.txt
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My father chases ghosts.
In a moment of uncharacteristic boldness, I once questioned my father on why he treated me with such cold detachment. Why his advice only ever seemed to come in the form of lecturing, and why he never hugged me, or even said he was proud of me. His words in that moment caused the small amount of respect I had for him to shake. He told me that he saw it as the mother's role to love a child, and that it was the father's role to keep the child on the straight and narrow. After some contemplation, I decided in that moment that I disliked him, not just as a parent, but as a person.
My father doesn't have a father. He was the product of an out-of-wedlock pregnancy between an interracial couple in the 60s... My grandmother was never willing to speak about what happened to my grandfather. I can only imagine he didn't stick around long, since my father never knew him, and grew up with only his mother. And it's always been clear to me that this bothered him. The man idolizes masculinity. Maybe desperate for a father figure, he found role models in his grandfather, whose portrait still hangs in his house and which he treats with great care, and his stepfather, whose surname he took (discarding his mother's last name) and passed on to me. Supposedly, his stepfather left his mother in a matter of years, so why my father idolizes him so, I don't understand. I've never met the man.
Perhaps similarly, my father left his mother's care the second he turned 18. Having lived with my grandmother for some years when I was in college, I can honestly understand why. She is prone to smothering the people she loves. In light of that experience, it maybe becomes easier to understand why my father would prefer a more distant form of parenting. Still, I don't agree with his philosophy on gender roles.
Some years after I transitioned, I had a conversation with my father that stuck with me. He said that he actually saw himself as rather unmasculine, a possibility that had never once occurred to me. With that in mind, I suppose he is somewhat short, and not especially muscular. He told me he had always felt insecure about it. But, unlike me, he had never once considered abandoning the pursuit of masculinity entirely. Rather, in his own words, he felt he needed to chase it even harder. To live up to the image he'd set for himself. The ghost of masculinity.
A lot became clear to me in that moment. My father is obsessed with chasing ghosts of how he thinks things Should Be. My mother once told me how he had this "plan" for where he wanted to be in life at each age. He wanted to live on his own by 20. He wanted to be married by 30. He wanted children by 40. When he found out my mother was pregnant, he married her as fast as he could. My mother didn't really care, but he said they HAD to be married before the baby was born. Things had to go in the right order. According to him, that was just how things Should Be.
He was chasing the ghost of the perfect nuclear family that was denied him.
They divorced when I was eight.
In light of all this, it becomes very clear why he acted the way he did when I was younger. I wasn't how his child Should Be. No matter how many things I was diagnosed with, he never bothered looking into what neurodivergency was, or how to deal with it, and simply held me to the standards of a neurotypical child. My mother tells me that when I was six, he yelled at me in a store for wanting to try on a dress. His child being autistic was something to be ignored until it went away. His child being transgender? Forget it.
In recent years, I think my father has started giving up on me. In a good way. Seeing me become happier as my transition progresses seems to have finally convinced him that he doesn't understand what's best for me, at least somewhat. I speak to him maybe once a month. But I often mourn the idea of a father I could've been closer to. A father with whom I could have had a relationship of love, and support. A father I never had.
Maybe I'm chasing a ghost too.
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Since you take requests, would I be able to ask for something with Mithrun and Kabru with like a reader that's kind of dense with social cues/hints (especially if they're romantic)?
(I had people confess their love to me, and I still didn't get it till they put it in very clear terms)
(it's probably the 'tism, but I digress. )
I think it's potentially an absolutely hellerious dynamic since Kabru always plays 5D chess with every social interaction. As for Mithrun, I think it's funny to think how the other canaries would just be repeatedly hitting their head on the wall because their captain won't say it straight and they just don't g e t i t.
Ps: I absolutely love how in-depth all of your understanding of characters and their personalities are, and I just hxfhxdvgudts.
This blog just brings me so much joy
Yaaa!!
âIá´âs á´ Dá´á´á´â Ká´ĘĘá´ x Rá´á´á´
á´Ę, MÉŞá´ĘĘá´É´ x Rá´á´á´
á´Ę
gn reader
5000 words ;P
Warning: reader is very oblivious. Like incomprehensibly oblivious (for the lolz)
.ăťă.ăťăâăť.ăťâŤăťăăťă.
⥠Kabru âĄ
- Kabru has had little flings here and there throughout his life. He treated every partner with respect, of course, but Kabru wasnât particularly looking for love. He doesnât dislike the idea of love, it just hasnât happened yet.
- So, when Kabru starts to genuinely fall in love with someone, itâs a new feeling. Heâs observant enough to recognize what it is.
- Unfortunately, the person heâs falling in love with is you.
âHeâs been unusually quiet lately,â Holm remarked. Who he was remarking that to remained to be seen. Mickbell didnât care much. Kuro had other things to worry about. And Rin had already made the same observation three times earlier that day.
The first floor of the dungeon was always crowded, and Kabruâs ears were usually open for anything that could be of use. The leather armor merchant to his left had recently raised his prices. The cobbler to the right was in an argument with an older lady over the shape of a patch heâd made on her favorite boots. And Holm was concerned about Kabruâs recent lack of observations; as concerned as Holm could be.
âIs that really such a shock?â Kabru sent Holm a smile over his shoulder. âIâm not exactly a chatterbox.â
But he was aware of himself enough to know that his behavior lately had been odd. He was usually so good at hiding it, too, but the comfort of his friends seemed to lower his walls. Without realizing it, Kabru had spent their latest dungeon expedition sighing to himself, staring at walls, and missing the details of important things. On the third floor, theyâd encountered thieves. His party always relied on him to clock the intentions of approaching adventurersâ thieves tended to be overly familiar, friendly, and a bit too eagerâ but Kabruâs mind was elsewhere. The thieves attacked, and it had genuinely taken him by surprise. The fight wasnât hard, but Kabruâs lack of preparation set off alarms in Rin and Holmâs heads.
âYouâre not,â Rin agreed. Her brow furrowed and she got that cute little line on her forehead again. âHowever, youâve really been out of it.â
âHave you been thinking about that person again?â Holm asked.
That person. That person? Kabru knew a lot of persons. The whole first level was filled to the brim with persons, half of them being his acquaintances. Kabru had zero desire to admit that he knew precisely who Holm was referring to, though, and decided to keep his gaze straight ahead as he weaved through the crowd.
When he didnât respond, Mickbell laughed, âYeah, heâs thinking of them alright.â
âHeat?â Kuro asked.
Mickbell scoffed from his place on Kuroâs shoulders, âTall-men donât go into heat! At least I donât think so. But they catch feelings, like a cold. Kabruâs caught a cold.â
âNot sneezing,â Kuro mumbled.
âA feelings cold, I mean! The worst kind.â
That was one way to put it. Kabru couldnât help but sigh as he led the party towards a quieter spot in the corner. Once they were out of the sea of people, he leaned against the stone wall and ran his fingers through his hair. âI donât have feelings, Iâm simply curious,â he said.
Curious. Right. Mickbell sent him a scrunched up, narrow-eyed look that was reminiscent of constipation. Yet, Rin interjected before the half-foot could say something heinous. âWhatâre you curious about, particularly?â She asked.
âGood question,â Kabru folded his arms over his chest and tilted his head in thought.
What was he curious about? You held so many secrets. You had this look in your eyes that drew him, a look that reminded him of a room in his motherâs house. She always told him to not go inside. Her rules only made him want to turn the knob even more. And when he finally did disobey her and go inside, all he saw were boxes full of ceramic unicorn miniatures. Still, the rush of satisfaction heâd felt at finally knowing what was in there couldnât be matched. Thatâs what he wanted to do to you, open your door and take a peek.
Or, perhaps a âpeekâ was an understatement. He wanted to meticulously inspect every inch of your mind with a microscope, to know the atoms unseen by the human eye, to be intimately acquainted with every molecule you possessed.
âHeâs zoned out again,â Holm muttered, ripping Kabru out of his thoughts.
He looked up, eyes widening at the observation. Holm was right, he was zoned out again, staring at the dirt on the floor and contemplating you.
He forced a smile, âDonât worry about me, really. Iâm just preoccupied. Itâs that person, I simply want to know their intentions.â
âIntentions for what?â Rin asked.
For everything. There was no simple answer.
âOh hey,â Mickbell glanced over his shoulder. His voice was flat as he scanned the room, âThere they are.â
Kabru followed Mickbellâs gaze, a straight line that led directly to youâ all lines seemed to lead directly to you lately. His heart clenched in a way that was both unpleasant and addictive. Without realizing it, he pushed away from the wall and began striding toward where you stood.
âWait,â Rin grabbed his arm as he passed. Kabru blinked, looking down at her and waiting for her to speak. She met his eyes and frowned, âI think youâre going to be disappointed. Theyâre not as mysterious as you think they are.â
Nonsense. You were incredibly mysterious. Kabru could tell you had secrets, layers. He dreamed of pulling them back one by one.
âThey couldnât disappoint me,â he sent Rin a smile that he hoped was reassuringâ he knew it was, heâd practiced it in the mirror and on other people all the time.
âI think they will,â she argued.
âThey wonât,â his smile faltered just the slightest. Rin didnât usually get involved in Kabruâs⌠hobby. Did she know something he didnât? He decided to not ask outright, accepting the challenge of figuring out the meaning behind her concern on his own.
Rin let go of his arm and Kabru was free to go. His mind switched elsewhere, onto you, and before he knew it he was already slipping through the crowd of bodies to reach you.
You were in front of the vegetable sellerâs stand, inspecting a lumpy potato. Kabru knew the vegetable seller was cheating on his wife. Usually, heâd try to get more out of the man, digging deeper simply for the sake of knowing. Yet, you stood there, beautiful and mind-consuming. What did Rin mean by âI think youâre going to be disappointedâ? Kabru was rarely disappointed with secrets.
âHey,â he raised a hand as he neared. You looked up from the potato and returned his smile. There was that look in your eyes again, that closed door he desperately needed the key to.
He loved crowds. He loved the hundreds of voices. He loved listening to each one and assigning them meaning, picking apart their words, filing them away into neat little categories. Yet, the crowd might as well have disappeared. All he saw was you. All he wanted was you and your words and your thoughts and your fears and your goals and your likes and your dislikes and your intentions and yourâ
âOh hey,â your voice cut through the wants like the slash of a sword, âKapru.â
Kapru.
His brows furrowed and he plastered on a polite smileâ also practiced in the mirror. âItâs Kabru.â
âRight, sorry,â you shrugged.
Were you playing with him? Were you sending your pawn out, a piece that you expected him to take for the sake of a larger, more powerful move? Was it bait?
âHow are you?â He forced himself to ask, though he could hear the weakness in his voice. He desperately hoped you wouldnât notice.
You only tilted your head in thought, âIâm fine. Just buying potatoes.â
âItâs been so long since weâve seen each other,â Kabru said. It was a lie, you saw him last week. âMy party and I are about to go back to the surface to restock. We could grab a drink if you wanted.â
âWhy?â You asked.
Why? Why? Kabru couldnât say why. He wouldnât say why. âI want to take detailed notes on every word you say, every gesture, every breathâ wouldnât be helpful to his cause in the least.
âBecause weâre friends,â he slowly explained. Again, there was that hint of weakness lacing every syllable. He wanted to tear his voice box apart and reconstruct it in a way that wouldnât falter every time he saw you.
But you didnât seem to notice. âAlright,â you sent him a smile that made his heart clench.
Alright. Kabruâs smile relaxed, âAlright,â he echoed. âItâs a date.â
âItâs a dateâ was a common saying, of course. But it still held implications, it still held desires, it still signified something moreâ At least to him it did.
You remained unphased by it, though. Usually, when Kabru said that, there would be a laugh or blush or the widening of eyes. You gave him nothing of the sort. No flirtatious looks, no intention-laced smile, no flicker of recognition.
âSee you then,â was all you said.
Rin was wrong. You couldnât disappoint him. Opening your doors and peeking inside your mind would be so satisfying.
- You go on several dates with Kabru without realizing theyâre dates.
- After one date when you make friends with the next table over and invite them to join your meal, introducing Kabru as âmy friendâ and not âthe man who is courting meâ or âmy boyfriendâ, he begins to wonderâŚ
- Do you not realize that these are dates?
Kabru knew he had the tendency to stare, but he usually kept that urge locked away for the sake of masking. Always masking. Always aware of his surroundings and the people and the words and the looks.
He kept his staring urge hidden at first. Yet as time passed, as you went on more dates, he couldnât help himself. He had to stare. He had to drink in every detail of your face, coveting it all as a desert wanderer would covet water.
And you didnât seem to mind. You would give him this look sometimes, a look he couldnât quite decipher. It was a mixture between affection and confusion and bashfulness. It was his favorite expression of yours and never failed to put butterflies in his stomach.
Kabru knew he was falling in love. He wasnât opposed to the idea, but heâd never been truly in love before. At night when he forced himself into bed, he stared at the ceiling and mused on the future you had together. Neither of you had said anything to make the relationship official, but was that even needed? It was obvious that you were togetherâ to him, at least.
Kabru held your hand as he led you through the crowded streets. Once you caught up to his side, he placed his palm on the small of your back. He wasnât much for PDA, but it was a necessity when traversing the island together. He didnât want to lose you in the crowd.
Once you were in a more quiet spot, he sent you a smile, âI have to ask, Iâm too curious; Whatâs your favorite date that weâve had together?â
You thought for a moment, âHm⌠I would have to say last week. It was a Thursday. I like Thursdays anyway. I think it was the 7th? Yeah. June 7th, Thursday. Thatâs a good date, itâs a bit cool outside and all the flowers are blooming. But if I had to say which one was my favorite, I think it would be April 18th. Iâm not sure that we spent that date together, though.â
âŚOkay.
Like the sunset rising over the mountains, it began to dawn on him.
Were you stupid?
No, you werenât stupid. He had seen you in the dungeon before, how you fought and strategized and reacted. You couldnât be stupid.
Then what? Were you playing hard to get? Were you teasing him? Was this a move on the board, your Knight piece pressing forward to continue the assault? Kabru needed to know.
He kept his hand on your back but his gaze straight ahead. âThatâs nice,â he said. It wasnât nice, actually. âWhat about when we hold hands? Do you enjoy that?â
You shrugged, âIt helps us keep track of each other as we go through a crowd.â
âBut I hold your hand even when weâre not around other people.â
The face you made betrayed your true thoughts. âYeah, it seems like your hands are cold a lot. You really should start keeping gloves with you.â
â...Do you think Iâm holding your hand because my fingers are cold?â
Another flash of confusion, another furrow of your brows. âWhy else would you hold my hand?â
The sun rose completely over the mountains and the daytime, clear and bright, engulfed his world.
You had no clue.
- This stresses Kabru out immensely.
- He starts taking notes. He has a special little book just for you. A lot of the pages are filled with scribbles and question marks.
- He makes a plan on what to do. Heâs going to up the ante, heâs going to make his feelings so clear that you canât ignore them or be oblivious even if you tried.
- He starts getting more touchy. He kisses your forehead often. He kisses your knuckles. Heâs around you all the time, every chance he gets. He tells you youâre beautiful. He says that he wants you to meet his mother. He talks about your future together.
- You say, âOh, your mom? Cool. You think weâll get along? Iâm always up for making new friends.â
- âYou want a future with me? Well, Iâm free next Wednesday.â
âI like you,â Kabru was breathless and wide-eyed. His hair was a mess from how often heâd run his fingers through it. He was disheveled and hadnât slept the entire night.
You glanced up from the book you were reading, âOh? Cool, thanks.â
He sent you a look. âNo, I mean I love you.â
âYeah,â you flipped a page in the book, âlove you too.â
âYou do?â Hope bloomed and unfurled like a spring flower. Kabru felt his cheeks grow warm, a fire igniting within him.
âYeah,â you said lightly, âI love all my friends, of course.â
That spring flower suddenly wilted. The fire was doused by a cold bucket of water in the form of your words. Kabru wanted to scream and bang his head against the wall.
âYou donât get it,â he hissed through clenched teeth, fingers tensing as he leaned forward, desperate. âIâm in love with you. This is really hard for me to say, but I think you need to hear it like this. I love you. I love you. I love youâŚâ Somehow, his cheeks went even hotter. His adams apple bobbed as he swallowed his embarrassment, âI-I⌠Sorry. I just need you like I need oxygen. IâŚâ
You snorted, âYou donât need me to breathe, Iâm a person not an organ. Youâre breathing right now just fine.â
He was not breathing just fine, but that was beside the point.
âExcuse me for a moment,â Kabru said. He could hear how strained his voice sounded.
You watched as he walked away, rounding a corner and disappearing from sight. Then he screamed. It sounded like he also kicked something, a crate or box maybe.
How odd.
- When it finally gets through your head, heâs actually a bit satisfied by your embarrassment at it all. Yes, please do acknowledge your obliviousness. Please do apologize for treating his love confession so casually. When you do so, he feels as if he could melt from the relief.
- He still wants to bang his head on the wall, though.
- And heâs spent a lot of nights screaming into his pillow.
- Kabru continues to play 5d chess with you, just simply out of habit, but youâre playing Hungry Hungry Hippos the entire time. He still finds himself trying to pick apart your actions and responses, but heâs learned how to take things at face value when it comes to you. Itâs a difficult adjustment, but one heâs willing to make.
- He starts to learn, take more notes, observe your behavior. For dates, he lays it out carefully. You two are going to do this specific thing. Why? Because he would like to see you happy, and hold your hand, and kiss you. Why? Because he loves you. Now you get it.
- Youâre fascinating actually. Genuinely, he starts to adore how your brain works. He wants to pick it apart and hold the pieces up to a magnifying glass.
⥠Mithrun âĄ
- He does not care.
- Be as oblivious as you want, thatâs not going to stop Mithrun.
- The Canaries, however, are going insane.
âHowâs it going with them?â Pattadol asked. Her hands were folded in front of her in that polite way, the way that told Mithrun that his second in command had something on her mind. Pattadol thought she was subtle. She was not.
And he knew precisely who she was referring to. Might as well give her an answer thatâll satisfy her curiosity, lest she keep asking questions.
âFine,â he answered, âjust fine.â
Yet, Pattadolâs brow furrowed. Not a good sign.
âJust fine?â She asked. Her voice went up a pitch. âItâs just fine? Really?â
âReally.â
She unlaced her fingers and spread out her hands as if gesturing to something, but all that surrounded them was Mithrunâs under-decorated living quarters. There was really nothing to gesture at besides the wooden cabinets and the bed. Mithrun waited, aware that she was picking through her piles of thoughtsâ probably thoughts mixed with screams of frustrationâ to find the right words.
Finally, Pattadol forced a shaken smile, âItâs clear to anyone that knows you that youâre in love with them, Captain.â
That was what she decided to say? It was a bit blunt for Pattadolâs usual style. Mithrun only shrugged, âYeah, youâre right. Itâs pretty obvious.â
âSo why havenât they noticed yet?â
âWhy do you care?â
âBecause I want you to be happy for once!â Pattadol snapped, but she then took a deep breath, âSorry, Captain, I didnât mean to sound that way. This is hard for me, talking so openly about these things⌠But itâs so frustrating to watch.â
Mithrun could understand that. While he personally wasnât frustrated by the circumstances, he knew that the Canaries couldnât stand watching his interactions with you. It wasnât a big deal in the long run, in his opinion. Theyâd get over it.
âThank you,â he answered.
âDo you have any ideas on how we can do that?â
âDo what?â
Pattadolâs eye twitched ever so slightly. Her fingers tensed like claws, and Mithrun felt the corner of his lips turn up in a barely-there smirk. But genuinely, he wasnât sure what she referred to. Did she mean the part about him being happy, or the part about you being oblivious? She shouldâve been more clear.
âAboutâŚâ she hesitated. Obviously she wasnât sure what she meant either. She then nodded as if deciding, âAbout everything. About the obliviousness, your happiness, etcetera.â
He didnât know what the etcetera referred to, but didnât care to ask. âYou donât have to do anything,â Mithrun assured her as he leaned back in the chair and folded his arms. The wood creaked slightly from the movement. Everything on this boat creaked, as was the nature of boats, he guessed.
âI would like to do something,â Pattadol nodded, determined. âWe all would.â
A shrug, âAlright. Then do something.â
- Pattadol, over-achiever and top student and certified Girl Who Cares Too Much, takes that as a challenge.
- Cithis only joins because she thinks itâll be funny.
- Fleki also only joins because she thinks itâll be funny.
- And Lycion also also joins because he thinks itâll be funny (though he does care on some level. Not really about you, but about Mithrun. And itâs painful to watch.)
- Otta is forced to join.
- The attempts are weak at first, like dipping a toe into the water to see how cold it is. Mithrun only has so much patience for interference with his life, so they have to be smart and tread carefully.
- Pattadol gives Mithrun a hint. âThereâs some pretty flowers growing beside the road over there. You should give one to them!â
- âWhat would they need a flower for?â
- Mithrun asks that on purpose. He knows precisely what heâs doing. Yes, people generally like receiving flowers, he knows that. But he also believes that flowers are useless gifts.
- âThen what present do you suggest?â Pattadol asks.
- Mithrun has an idea. He gets you soap. Everybody uses soap (hopefully) Itâs a useful gift, and if he gives you the same kind he uses then heâll get some weird sick flicker of pleasure from having his scent on you. (He wisely chooses to not say that part aloud.)
You held the little bar of soap in your hands as if it were an injured baby bird you found on the ground. Yet your feelings towards it were far from protective or empathetic. This soap said something. It had a mouth and it used it to scream.
You met Mithrunâs flat gaze, âSoapâŚâ
He nodded, âYeah. Soap. Itâs a gift for you.â
For you?
Mithrun continued, âItâs the same kind I use. Smells the same.â
It felt as if youâd swallowed a handful of pebbles and they all had gotten stuck in your throat. âDo you⌠think Iâm stinky?â
You cursed yourself for even asking that. What a useless question. Obviously, he thought you stank! He gave you soap! He was trying to tell you something, being subtle and polite for once! Usually Mithrun would just say it bluntly, but heâd been working on his desires lately. Perhaps heâd also decided to embrace societal expectations? You werenât sure. But soap. Soap!
You didnât notice how Mithrun tensed. You didnât see him quickly blink several times and tilt his head. You didnât see the slight widening of his good eye. âNo, Iââ
âIâll go use this right now,â you interrupted, âIâll go wash away my stench so you can finally stand to be near me.â
Despite the horror, you were a bit proud of yourself. Youâd taken a hint, maybe you were getting less oblivious.
- In your defense, a bar of soap is a weird gift.
- Alright. Mithrun admits it, he needs help. Heâs not so prideful anymore that he wonât admit that he doesnât know what to do.
- Pattadol is really triumphant about that but does her best not to show it.
- Plan B: make it so obvious that you have no choice but to realize his feelings.
âThis has to be the most physically uncomfortable Iâve felt in a very long time,â Mithrun said as he tugged at the ends of the fancy, over-decorated blouse the Canaries had put him in. âI honestly prefer Cithisâs frilly dresses.â
Which was saying something. Mithrun had a preference? That was a good sign.
âIt makes you look handsome,â Pattadol said.
âThe only thing it makes me is itchy,â he corrected.
The Canaries had somehow found a blouseâ not a shirt or tunic, a blouseâ that made Mithrun feel something other than indifference. He usually didnât care about what he wore, as long as it was comfortable, but the clothes theyâd stuffed him into were offensive to human-kind, like vegan bacon.
It had a big frill on the front and puffy sleeves. It was somehow both too flowy and too tight at the same time. The trousers werenât much better, digging into his legs. And the shoesâŚ
Mithrun didnât want to talk about the shoes.
It was clear to him that Fleki and Cithis had only contributed to the outfit because they thought it would be amusing. Good for them, he supposed. Pattadol seemed to genuinely like it, Otta looked horrified, and Lycion was in some in between state where he wanted to show pity but couldnât quite stifle his giggles.
âRemind me again what the point of this is?â Mithrun asked with a sigh.
âWe got them to agree to a date!â Pattadol said, grinning, âI said outright âitâs a dateâ so there would be no confusion. I made it clear that the date was with you. Now, if you show up looking like a million gold with a bouquet of flowers, theyâll get the hint.â
Mithrun did not want to do that.
Mithrun rarely wanted to do anything, but this just felt wrong. In his opinion, the relationship between you and him would develop naturally in a way that fit both of your personalities. He didnât mind waiting for you to realize his intentions, he had time. As long as you didnât fall in love with someone else, and didnât stop him from staring at you or touching you, then he wasnât in a rush.
But since the Canaries insisted, seeming to think that this was the right course of action, he would go along with it. Maybe it would be an utter disaster and Pattadol would realize that she knew very little about relationshipsâ especially a relationship involving Mithrun. He was aware enough of himself to know that it wouldnât be conventional.
With his hair pulled back into a tight ponytail and the ridiculous outfit on, Mithrun entered the restaurant Pattadol had chosen. He found you immediately. You sat in a chair with your elbow on the table and your ankles crossed, waiting.
Mithrun held a bouquet of pink roses as he approached. You lit up when you saw him, but your brows then furrowed.
âWhereâs Pattadol?â You asked.
His stride faltered, âShe isnât coming.â
âOh,â you shrugged, âwell since she set this up I assumed sheâd be here.â
Why would she be here? It was a date Pattadol had set up for you and Mithrun specifically.
You probably didnât know it was a date, he realized. Pattadol thought sheâd been clear by saying âitâs a dateâ but failed to realize that that was just a common phrase among people and meant nothing to no one.
Calm, he slid into the seat across from you and watched as you raised a brow, âWhatâre you wearing?â You asked.
âMy team picked it out for me.â
âYou look like youâre part of an opera or a ballet, like youâre about to stand beneath a balcony and start spouting poetry to your lover.â
That was a good description, actually. Those were the words Mithrun had been looking for earlier when he saw himself in the mirror.
He nodded, âYep.â Then, wordlessly, he held out the bouquet to you.
Your eyes widened, âFor me?â
âIâm handing them to you, arenât I?â
Gingerly, you took the flowers and held the stem of the wrapped bouquet with both hands as you inspected each petal.
A flicker of surprising satisfaction ran through his chest. You liked the flowers. It made sense, most people liked flowers, even if he didnât see why.
You dipped your head down toward them presumably to smell them, but your lips then parted and you dug your teeth into the nearest rose.
Mithrun froze.
You chewed on the rose, your nose wrinkling in disgust. You gave the flower a good shot, a proper taste, but it didnât take long until you grabbed a napkin and spit up the pink slobbery mess into it.
âSorry,â you sent him an apologetic smile and tried to hand the bouquet back to him, âthey donât taste that good, and I donât think I could season or cook them in a way that would help.â
Mithrun knew he was staring. He knew he was making a face, slightly tilting his head down, intensity in his eye. The kind of face someone made when they were internally screaming.
He was not internally screaming, but he was thinkingâ about you, how your brain worked. And how it was so damn charming for some reason and all he wanted to do was kiss you until he was all you could think about.
He wanted something. The feeling was sweet, a shot of adrenaline, one of Flekiâs drugs. Addictive. Like the slow drip of honey. He could survive off that want for ages.
Wordlessly, Mithrun threw the bouquet over his shoulder to get rid of it. Judging by the gasp that followed, it probably hit someone in the head.
Loving you was as natural to him as breathing.
- Mithrun decides to not let the Canaries interfere any longer. He was wrong earlier in thinking he needed their help. He doesnât.
- Also, watching them go insane over your obliviousness and his lack of communication provides a good bit of entertainment.
- When he finally decides to give into that all-consuming, new, exciting desire and kiss you, your response is, âBut I wasnât casting a spell, no reason to try and stop me.â
- God, he adores you.
- He takes kisses whenever he wants them, with no care about what you think his intention is.
- After a certain kiss that involves tongue and teeth and fingers digging into your waist, you start to openly wonder⌠Are you in a relationship with Mithrun?
âYes,â Mithrun didnât even glance up at you, remaining unphased by your rather serious question, âWeâre in a relationship.â
He continued to jot down notes about a monster he saw, as if heâd just casually answered a question about the weather. âIs it going to rain today?â âYeah looks like it.â
You gulped, âHow long?â
âA year now,â he kept writing. Truthfully, heâd been expecting this. A flash of disappointment crossed his mind; there goes one of his hobbies, watching the Canaries have a crisis over his love life.
You buried your face in your hands. Mithrun stopped writing and patted your head as if comforting a dog.
- The Canaries are pleased that this is over. But actually, theyâre going to have to watch you not realize it when youâre engaged to the Captain.
- At your wedding youâre in regular clothes. Someone asks why and you say âMithrun told me weâre going to a wedding. He didnât say it was ours.â
・シ:*:シďžâ
,・シ:*:シďžâ
#dungeon meshi#asks#mithrun#delicious in dungeon#mithrun of the house of kerensil#mithrun x reader#dunmeshi#dungeon meshi x reader#kabru x reader#kabru#kabru of utaya#x reader#reader insert#my writing#gn reader#oblivious reader
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Extra Step.
RQ: 'So my mind has been absolutely overrun by the bamfs recently and I was wondering if I could request headcanons or a oneshot (or anything you're comfortable with making it really) with a reader that absolutely adores and coddles the bamfs and maybe even Kurt realizing he wants a kid with them because of it (but only if you feel like adding that). I just wanna cuddle a bamf honestly :') I feel like it would heal my soul.' - @shadykazama
Warnings: GN!reader, mentions of pregnancy/wanting pregnancy
A/N: Went with headcannons, a little shorter because I have another similar request I am writing out for this topic lol.
Kurt knows how much you love the bamfs, the bamfs adore you right back. You treat them as your own, you love on them like they are the most precious things in the world.
They follow you around like little ducklings, piling behind you and making soft noises at you for attention.
Kurt notices how gentle and sweet you are with them, how you cuddle and soothe them, giving them lots of gentle kisses and snuggles. Sometimes he feels jealous, but he can't take care of them like you can.
You feed them all good food, you know their likes and dislikes, and you make sure they get lots of sleep. Honestly, you treat them like your own babies.
Kurt secretly watches as you hum to the bamfs as they are all tucked into bed, your hand gently stroking their heads as you give them their very last kiss of the night. Each bamf snuggles closer and makes gentle cooing, their little yawns show off their teeth and they snore lightly.
He just loves seeing you care for them like this, never did he think his partner would ever want to care for his bamfs in such a dedicated way. They were a handful, the rascals were wild and crazy, they made messes and were somewhat destructive. You always shrugged it off, they needed to let off energy.
Plus you were pretty sure that before, Kurt wasn't giving them enough ways to let out their energy.
It was only when he watched you holding one bamf like a baby in your arms did he realize he wanted more. He felt himself swallow as he realized that he wanted a baby with you. Not a bamf, a baby. He wanted to be a dad.
He watched you holding the bamf in a blanket, snuggling it like an infant. The urge grew stronger and stronger in him, he imagined it being your baby, his baby, cuddling it and gently humming down to the little one.
You hadn't noticed Kurt's obvious stares, or how he rubbed against you in a much more affectionate way. He had no idea how to bring it up or ask, he just knew it was something he wanted.
"Liebe...I have been thinking...." he grabs your wrists and looks you in the eye, "Let's have a baby." He blurted the words to you suddenly, and you were caught off guard by his confession.
"I see how you care for the bamfs, it makes me feel that I want a little one with you. I want to see you with a baby...our baby." He confessed further to you, telling you all his desires to make you a parent.
Initially you were a little unsure, since a baby is more serious than a bamf. But...you loved Kurt and couldn't say no. You felt just as excited about it.
Whether you can conceive naturally or adopt, Kurt feels so much pride and joy when he sees you holding your baby. He couldn't ask for anything else.
Thanks for reading.
*BAMF*
Dividers by @/adornedwithlight
Cover image from Nightcrawler (2014) #6
#kurt wagner#nightcrawler#kurt wagner x reader#nightcrawler x reader#xmen#x men 97#x men#đ my works
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them as your older brother, finding out you have a crush on one of their members
â nct dream ᥣđŠ
cw : some of them question ur taste in men but thats overall it, just some playful banter :D
a/n : really nervous for my exam tmr so i wrote this to calm me down ^^ gender neutral as always but it's a little shorter than my other one, hope you guys enjoyyyt <3
mark:
your crush on renjun wasn't that obvious at first
well that was until your youtube search history betrayed you
mark was borrowing your laptop one day and was so confused when the most recent searches was just renjun
"renjun fancam" "renjun cute moments" "renjun being mad at dreamies"
didn't put two and two together just yet but it was at the back of his mind for sure
would call you to visit the dreamies more often to see if his assumption was right okay scooby doo
you'd bring snacks and drinks most of the time, somehow always getting renjun's favourite stuff
texted you the moment he was sure that you do have a crush on his bandmate
you admitted it and since then he's been the #1 y/njun shipper
gives you updates about renjun
if it isn't obvious enough, he does approve of junnie (maybe a little too much)
renjun:
came to him one day for help since you were thinking of confessing to haechan
looked directly into your eyes and tells you you can do better than haechan
"haechan? of all people??"
proceeded to tell you that he already knows about your little crush
would tell you things that haechan likes or dislikes, even though he looks like he disapproves
secretly happy that its someone he knows really well and not some random douche
you'd notice jun's little ways of helping you get with your crush
you give him a small smile and he'd mouth to thank him later
would still nag to you because he really can't see what you see in his bandmate
"whatever makes you happy"
don't worry, he approved of haechan after seeing the way he treats you
jeno:
tried to act surprise when you said you found mark interesting
you hit him jokingly because of how bad his acting was
teases you about your crush
when you visit the dreamies he does that thing with his eyebrows and makes it really obvious that you like his bandmate
but for real though, he'd be really supportive and actually try to help you out
would still give you the 'don't get your hopes up' talk since he doesn't want you to be heartbroken
happy that you came to him for help with your little crush (you? not so happy because he's so obvious)
"mark did you see y/n's new hair?" "mark doesn't y/n smell good today?" "mark you're not gonna give y/n a hug too?"
you want to smack jeno every time he does it thank god mark lee is oblivious as hell
haechan:
thought that you were joking when you said like jaemin
realised that you were serious and suddenly theres plan a all the way till z to get you and jaemin together
one of then was to lock you both in a closet (in hopes that it ends with you guys kissing ONLY)
like jeno, tells you to not get your hopes up too high since the last thing he wants is to see his sibling cry over a MAN.
still questions why you like jaemin though, he thinks that that guy is weird
tried to tell you things to give you the ick about jaemin but it doesn't work
at one point he got too tired waiting for you to confess so he told jaemin himself
don't worry, he told you when he was going to spill the beans (yeah like 5 seconds before he said it)
jaemin:
jisung?? of all people??? that boy can't even take care of himself, how would he take care of you?
gives you a whole ted talk on why you should go for a real man like mark or jeno instead
ends up seeing what you see in jisung though
tall? deep voice? big hands? can dance? that ticks off everything in your list!
the talk ends with him being supportive and brainstorming ideas on how to make you guys a real couple
would straight up tell jisung that you like him
probably gave jisung a whole protective brother talk that scared the poor guy
tells you that it's the only way because things need to be clearly said to jisung or else he'd be too shy to initiate anything
asks for cat food in return if everything works out because he has children to feed!
chenle:
be fr, zhong chenle knows everything
so when you told him that you like jeno he did not bat an eye
tbh he was just waiting for you to admit it before going through with his plan
the plan? you accidentally tripping in front of jeno, landing on top of him, and kissing him
you just stand there thinking if your brother was actually stupid enough to think that it'll work
doesn't play when it comes to y/nno
but if jeno does end up liking you back suddenly chenle's favourite place is the gym
also doesn't play when it comes to protecting his sibling
warns jeno that if he breaks your heart then he will break other things!
jisung:
was appalled when he found out that you like chenle
chenle? zhong chenle?? his best friend of 8 years zhong chenle ???
give him a second to take it all in
finally connected the dots on why you keep asking for updates about chenle
would help you out in a subtle way
ways like making chenle sit beside you or asking chenle to call you instead of doing it himself
backfires soon after since he told chenle that you watch basketball
forgot to add in wives, you watch basketball wives not basketball itself
can't keep a secret for too long, especially one about chenle so give it 2 weeks tops before your crush finds out
fair to say it ended with both of them spamming you (one to apologise and the other? other reasons)
#nct#nct dream#park jisung x reader#jisung x reader#chenle x reader#jaemin x reader#haechan x reader#jeno x reader#renjun x reader#mark x reader#mark lee x reader#nct x reader#nct dream x reader#nct x you#nct dream x you#nct dream reactions#nct reactions#nct dream fluff#nct fluff#nct headcanons#nct dream headcanons#nct imagines#nct dream imagines#nct dream scenarios#nct scenarios
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Next to You
spencer reid x fem!reader
summary: sharing a room with the person in the bau that hates you the most makes you go through more emotions than you thought possible
warnings: kind of enemies to lovers, arguing, crying, no use of y/n, smut, nsfw - 18+ only, apology sex, soft sex, fem oral, protected p in v, praise, typical criminal minds death and unsub mentions
word count: 2.7k
Last minute cases in desolate towns in the midwest often meant that there was nowhere for the team to stay. It wasn't uncommon for you to have to pair or group up with other team members in dodgy motel rooms.
The most recent investigation had brought you all to the middle of nowhere in Nebraska, a long day ending with a drive to an motel that housed 7 rooms in total.
You, Reid and Rossi were the last to arrive so when Prentiss handed you a room key and told you that you would be sharing with Reid, it was already too late to complain.
"It's for your own good" she she grinned, picking her go-bag off the floor beside her.
"I hate you" you sighed.
"Sure you do" she was already walking off. You've been face to face with serial killers regularly, and this was just surviving a few nights in the same room as Spencer Reid, you could do this.
You walked back outside to find Reid standing in the dark by the car, right hand in this pocket and his left leaning against the black SUV.
"Looks like you're with me, Reid" you announced and the way that his face instantly dropped almost knocked you over. It was almost like you'd told him you were about to kill him.
"Come on" you began walking down to room 4, Spencer following shortly behind as you unlocked the door.
Being met with just one double bed though was enough to bring tears to your eyes. The couch looked like it had been through the war and there was no way on earth you were even touching it. And the sigh that Spencer let out made you want to rip your own hair out.
"I'm gonna sleep in the car" you quickly turned around to walk out of the door.
"You're not sleeping outside with a killer targeting women the exact same age as you on the loose" he stopped you in your tracks. He was right. "I can take the couch".
You were a little surprised at the chivalry but thankful none the less. "Are you sure?"
He didn't answer, instead dropping himself onto the couch.
Feeling content with his actions, you dropped your own bag on the floor beside the bed and told him you were going to use the bathroom before cleaning yourself up and changing into the oversized t-shirt you were using as pyjamas.
Coming out of the bathroom again, you were going to tell Reid that he was free to use the bathroom now but he simply glared at you.
It was as if he wanted to make your life hell. He always scowled at you, made snarky comments on little details about you, gloated whenever you got anything wrong. He always drove you up the walls, since you first started at the BAU, and you never knew why.
It's not like you had done anything to him, from what you knew at least. You smiled and shook his hand when you met him and even thought he was cute, you treated him just like you did with everyone else on the team, but you quickly noticed how differently he treated you.
You gave him plenty of time to warm up to you before you let yourself develop any solid opinions on him. You were warned about how he took to knew people, and you were understanding at first. But after you were several months in, and now years, and he still treated you like an outsider, you were no longer shy to expressing your dislike for him.
Other people on the team noticed it too, you, JJ, Garcia and Emily often discussing it with each other, but if one of them ever mentioned Spencer's attitude to himself, he'd deny everything and brush it off.
You really tried to not let it get to you, especially with the support from others, But man, did it upset you.
Spencer eventually got himself ready in the bathroom and came back out, silently setting himself up on the couch as you sat in the bed and did some research. There was a nice silence for a while, and then:
"Could you stop turning the pages so loud" he sounded irritated already and you hadn't even spoken to each other in the past 30 minutes.
"What?" you matched his tone, was he really trying to start a fight with you right now?
"I can't even think with how much noise you're making"
"I'm not making any noise, Reid, what's wrong with you?"
"You're flicking the pages, I can't pay attention to anything else"
"Oh so the sound of paper is able to stop boy genius in his tracks?" you mocked, pissed off at what he was choosing to do do.
He glared at you in response, he looked like he was about to blow a fuse.
"I don't know how to help you here, Reid, I'm trying to work on the case"
"Yeah, trying, it's not like you've ever actually done anything important for one" his voice had raised slightly.
"What?"
"You're practically incompetent, how you got recruited to the bureau, I'll never know" you hadn't even noticed him standing up, but it suddenly made you feel uncomfortable so you got out of the bed too, standing on the opposite side of the room.
"Excuse me?" you were completely shocked now, how had he gotten so far.
"You heard me. You have no place on this team. All you do is mess things up, you can't figure anything out and then you go and let our unsubs go"
Oh
You knew exactly what he was talking about. During one of your first cases, you had unintentionally informed an unsub that the FBI were searching for him during an interview with his wife and he got away. He was dangerous and you had never forgiven yourself for the people who had died before he was finally caught.
You just broke down in tears after that. It felt like he'd re-opened the wound right there and then.
"Fuck you" you spat through tears. You couldn't even look at him now, turning your back to him to sit on the bed.
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry" it was like he had suddenly snapped out of the unexplained rage he was just experiencing.
You felt the bed dip as he sat down behind you, and then a hand rest on your shoulder.
You were edging on losing the ability to breathe. It wasn't even just remembering the worst experience you had on the job, it was the fact that Spencer had used it against you just to get a reaction out of you. You wouldn't have even expected that from him.
He just sat behind you as you attempted to regain some sense of composure, not saying anything else. Was he finally feeling some sense of remorse for how horribly he had been treating you?
Once he noticed that your breathing had slowed, he called out your last name, your work name. It felt so impersonal in that moment. Not that you'd ever been on a first name basis with him, but you gave no reaction to him.
He tried again, squeezing your shoulder this time. You gave him nothing.
But then he whispered your name. Your first name. It was quiet, apologetic.. desperate.
You sniffled, wiping the tears from under your eyes before you turned around to look at him. He was sitting right behind you in the bed now, his big brown eyes practically burning a hole in your head. You knew you probably looked like a mess now, face red and wet, eyes puffy, and hair mangled.
"God, I'm sorry" his hand reached up to wipe a stray tear from your cheek "I'm such an idiot, I can't believe I said that".
You flinched at his touch, not saying anything back to him.
"If I could take that back I would, I did not mean it. It was just in the moment" he tried to hold your face in his hand but you avoided his touch.
"In the moment?" you repeated "What even was that moment. It's like you wanted to have an argument with me for fun".
"I don't want to argue with you, I just.."
"You just hate me" you finished.
"No! I don't hate you, I'm just stupid and don't know how to deal with how I feel about you"
You looked directly into his eyes, eyebrows furrowed. "How you feel about me?"
You managed to catch his gaze as it briefly flicked down to your lips. It felt like something was drawing you closer as you moved towards him.
"Please, let me make it up to you".
"No. Are you saying you've treated me like this because you can't figure out what to do about your feelings for me? What are you? Twelve? You've made my life miserable."
The tears spilled out again, what was he even saying?
"Please, just let me show you how sorry I am"
His voice was laced in what could only be described as desperation, it was making you want to hear him out, forgive him, and you didn't quite know why.
"Please" his voice was on the verge of breaking.
Your walls were crumbling down, it was like he'd cast a spell on you
"please"
You only nodded, allowing him to to lean in closer to you, finally cupping your head in his hands and softly pressing his lips against yours.
It was like he was purposefully avoiding any roughness as he gently kissed, from your lips down your jaw and then down your neck. He looked at you then, his eyes meeting yours in a silent question. And you nodded.
He loosely grabbed the hem of your shirt, and you let him lift it up over your head.
He didn't touch you yet, kissing your lips again as he began to slide your underwear down. You manoeuvred enough for him to take them off you completely. He was so gentle that you didn't even think of feeling self-conscious being completely undressed in front of him.
He urged you to spread your legs and quickly laid down on his stomach in between them.
You barely had time to blink before his lips were on you, kissing up the inside of your thigh. as his hands wrapped around you, holding you down.
Then, he was softly licking up your cunt, softly moaning to himself as he tasted you. He avoided your clit, dragging his tongue everywhere except where you needed him most.
"Spence" the nickname drove him crazy, he finally felt like maybe you could be his.
He finally flicked his tongue over your clit and you couldn't help but push your hips against his face, a whine slipping from your lips.
He only egged you on, using your legs to pull closer to his mouth. He kept circling your clit, increasing the amount of pressure he used as your squirmed under him.
Every few moments, he'd bring his tongue down again, dipping into your hole gently, gathering your slick, before suckling at your clit again.
Slurs of his name, swears and a few 'oh my gods' were the only coherent sounds that could leave your mouth. He had gotten you incredibly sensitive and you felt like you could tip over the edge at any moment.
Spencer himself couldn't stop himself from moaning at your taste, your sounds, how your skin felt under his hands. The vibrations pushing you further.
He suddenly sucked a bit harsher, almost nipping your clit before going back to his previously gentle movements.
The contrast between the rare harsher movements and his gentle attention had you bucking into his face, only to be stopped by his hands pushing you down.
All of a sudden, you felt your release. You moaned much to loud as you writhed under Spencer's mouth, him carrying you through your orgasm.
Just as you felt yourself come down, you went to pull yourself away from Spencer, but he refused to let you, keeping you pinned down to the bed as he let himself taste your release.
"Spencer, please" you were so incredibly sensitive at this point, your body jolting at every small movement. You had to bite the side of your hand to stop yourself from yelling out from the pleasure.
He suddenly pulled off of you with a soft *pop* ad sat up, quickly kicking his trousers and boxers off as you reached forward and loosened his tie and unbuttoned his shirt.
Now that he too was undressed, you felt more equal, it was almost metaphorical as if he was agreeing to end the weird tension between the both of you.
He sat between your legs again, lifting your legs around his hips. You hadn't noticed the condom he had taken out from his pocket until you heard the crinkle of the foil as he opened it.
He quickly rolled it down his shaft as you finally got the chance to look at him. You felt yourself clench in anticipation.
He finally lined himself up and you were subconsciously pushing your hips down towards him.
"Please, Reid" you practically begged as he leaned forward but he stopped at your words.
You looked into his eyes, pleading for him to fill you up, but he didn't.
"Spencer" you whined, and he quickly rutted his hips into you.
"Thats it, good girl" he praised as the air was knocked from your lungs.
He started slow, using one hand to prop himself up and the other to finally caress your skin. It was like he was trying to memorise the curves of your body with one hand. He grabbed at your hips, held your waist, squeezed your breasts, as he slowly picked up his pace.
He couldn't get enough of feeling your body as he pinched your nipple, marvelling at the way it hardened further.
"God, you're so beautiful" his hand finally fell down to your clit, rubbing small circles in time with his thrusts.
You couldn't even get a single word out at this point, too tired and desperate to say anything.
"I'm so sorry baby" if he didn't have your attention before, the name had definitely gotten it now. "I'll be so good for you from now on" you could tell he was close from the waver in his voice, but you too felt your 2nd release approaching.
"You're so perfect" his rambling was interrupted by groans, "never want to leave your side ever again" his thrusts had last there rhythm as he circled your clit quicker, desperate to get you to cum before him.
It didn't take long for the coil in your stomach to snap, vision blurring as he continued his thrusts. Not much after, he plunged into you one last time. You could feel him coming inside as he filled up the condom, his chest now flush against yours.
You both laid there for a few moments, enjoying the hot, sticky embrace as you caught your breathe.
Silently, Spencer pulled out, taking off the condom and throwing it in the trash before pulling his boxers on. He then got you cleaned up, helping you put on your own underwear afterwards, before you got into the bed.
He tried to walk over to the couch but you were not letting that happen. âGet in here Reid" you muttered, laughing quietly as he practically jumped in beside you.
As he faced you in the bed, he brushed a stray hair behind your ear. "I'll make it up to you, I'm sorry, about everything" he kissed you once more, it would take more time for you to forgive him, but for now you let yourself fall asleep in his arms.
#spencer reid#spencer reid smut#dr spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x reader smut#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x you smut#criminal minds#criminal minds smut#spencer reid x fem reader#spencer reid x female reader#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x y/n smut#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencerreid#spencer reid x fem!reader smut#spencer reid fluff
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Okay, I actually really like this. And I can say why.
"But Dana isn't it hypocritical to Like Lunar's 'villain arc' while disliking Nexus's?"
Not really. Because what Lunar is doing is consistent with his character. Which is, entirely selfish motivations as he has always had before, and I'll explain Lunar's motivations and why he makes a better compelling villain arc. And who knows, maybe Lunar will rush back and say he's sorry after one or two episodes when Nexus didn't.
But Nexus/N!Moon grieving over someone he loved, everyone assuming he's evil and them making a heel turn into 'irredeemable evil' I didn't like because it was contradictory to the past year we spent with N!Moon and unintentionally felt like it villainized grieving in an ugly way. And I've expressed the dislike of All of Nexus's worst fears coming true. He believes his family doesn't understand, they treat him like villain immediately. He thinks he's easily replaceable and not as talented as the Old Moon. Old Moon comes back, replaces him, is accepted immediately and was proven to be intellectually superior to N!Moon. He thinks he's broken that he's beyond repair and can't be fixed. Earth gave up on him really quickly despite being aware of his coping mechanisms (lashing out) (even before the "collateral damage" thing) Ruin lied and manipulated him and killed Solar. Nexus never wanted to be manipulated again.... D!Sun put the plans in place that he was the perfect pawn in an interdimensional sacrifice to get the outcome he wanted. Nexus wanted his family to join him and understand him. No one understood him and he died at the hands of his own brother.
Nexus died with all his worst fears and nightmares confirmed true. It's honestly tragic and horrible.
NOw.... Lunar. Getting into this little bean. Has a far more compelling reason to be corrupted by Negative star power. That is consistent with his character and just doesn't replace Lunar with... Lexus or something.
So Lunar was just told recently by Taurus and Gemini, that he has reached the precipice of his training and neither will train him anymore. With his mental block on his trauma and Eclipse and just apathetic to everything, he can't tap into his emotions or power. Understandably, Lunar is frustrated by this and feels no one is listening to him and feels his partner is being demeaning (they're not. And it's not about him. But Lunar is to selfish to get that.)
People often don't understand that Gemini does not try to be intentionally demeaning to Lunar. They do not have human emotions like we do, or even the animatronics do. They operate at a different level beyond our human comprehension, So I don't place Astrals into mortality boxes. And Lunar, is still a very childish and selfish character, and seems to not understand their partner. Even if they do like them a whole lot. They just don't understand them at a fundamental level. It's hard to have an emotional connection to someone who doesn't have human emotions, (or who is just starting to feel emotions in small doses but that's just a theory) and Lunar does not have the patience or emotional maturity to deal with someone who operates like that.
So Rez puts it out there for Lunar to get stronger then they are willing to train him and SO OF COURSE Lunar would jump at that because he feels infantilized and has felt that way by his partner for a long time. Keep it in mind, Gemini does not do this intentionally, and makes this clear to Lunar MANY TIMES over the entire course of the year they have been interacting.
Not to mention, Sun killing Nexus disturbed something across dimensions. It's as I said when Nexus first turned to the dark side. It's like all Moon's destiny is to inherently be doomed by ambition. Lunar included in that. Lunar following in Nexus's footsteps. Because those who don't know their history are doomed to repeat it. And Lunar is the prime example. And this is horrible. Maybe it's hypocritical of me to like Lunar's heel turn into a Sasuke arc. But this is on a path of destiny that needs to break. And that's why I think I find it a bit more compelling from a character motivation and writing stand point. So. Yes. Lunar abandoning his family when they need him. Horray!!!
I think I just like it because it is consistent with all of Lunar's characterization up to this point. And because he did not care or know what was going on with Nexus, he will get corrupted by the NSP too. Who knows, maybe Lunar will gain a new found sympathy for Nexus knowing how Dark Star Power fucks with your head and insecurities.
#tsams#laes#full disclosure i was drinking when I typed this so the second half might sound less coherent then the first half#danachan's rants#Sun and Moon show#Lunar and Earth show
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Gojo x reader who's a student and she's 18y/o and he likes yn but yn doesn't or she doesn't wanna admit
SENSEI â F. READER x GOJO SATORU
Gojo Satoru is your sensei and everyone seem to notice that he likes you more than anyone else. Everyone but you.
cw: student x teacher, age gap (reader is 18, Satoru is 28), very brief description of fighting, public kissing â 1,4k words
a/n: thank you for the suggestion! I made if sfw but I made the ending open for part two maybe? I hope you enjoy it đŠś
Âť PART TWO [nsfw]
"Idiot," you grunted, your cheek was pressed against the grass as Gojo forced his knee into your back, holding both your hands in one of his own, the other keeping your head down. Another day, another training session with your teacher â you couldn't count how many of these you've already been through, but you can easily count how many sparring matches you've won. None.
"That's a strange way to ask for mercy, sweetheart, but okay," he hummed. You can tell he was grinning just by the sound of his melodic tone and you snapped at him, "I'm not asking for mercy, sensei."
"Ay, ay, so stubborn," Satoru chuckled and lifted up so you could do the same and as you stood on your feet, facing him, his hand caressed your cheekbone, successfully freezing you on the spot. The touch was so gentle that if you didn't know better, your knees would probably buckle from the sensation. But this was Gojo. The flirtiest of flirts, and the man you deeply disliked. It's not that you despised him, no, it's just the way he carries himself, the way he treated everyone around him, and most importantly, the way he treated you.
When you moved to Tokyo, joining Jujutsu High, you were barely fifteen, a first-year student that Satoru recruited himself by finding you on the streets of your small town and saving you from the mental facility that you already had one foot in, voluntarily. Before that, you tried to live your life as normally as one could, ignoring everything you saw around you because no one else seemed to see it. The curses, which you did not know were curses at the time, made you doubt your sanity for the longest time.
After moving, everything became easier â you met people who were just like you, you learned how to fight and mastered the cursed techniques in no time. Now, you just recently turned eighteen, you were pushing your last year of education, though there wasn't much more to learn, so you focused on helping younger students and if you were to be honest, this practice had taught you more than any theory could. You had the luck, or misfortune, to be Gojo's first official student â he took care of you himself, helping you to refine your control over the cursed energy and thanks to his guidance, you quickly discovered and mastered your own cursed technique, and since there wasn't much anyone could teach you at this point, you trained hand-to-hand with Satoru.
"Think you have more in you?", he asked, his thumb still brushing across your cheekbone and you took a step back. "I'm always ready to kick your ass," you bit, your eyes narrowing as you clenched your fists.
"That's my girl," Gojo grinned and you snorted at the sight. He's always so careless, never taking any of your attacks seriously, bragging about how untouchable he is, turning your wildest dreams into fantasies about erasing that infuriating smile from his face. And he was taking your fists like they're nothing, blocking and pushing them away like he's chasing a fly away when you tried to land a punch, with no luck at all. "Come on, I'm sure you can hit me at least once," he mocked, moving effortlessly, as if he could see what action your body will take before you even think about it.
"Shut up," you groaned, trying and trying, before he kicked you in the stomach, pushing you against the tree and you had no time to react before he was pressing you back with his own body. The sudden closeness made you gasp and act impulsively, but Gojo blocked the knee that buckled up, aiming for his crotch. "Nuh-uh, that's against the rules," he chuckled and you felt his breath against your lips.
"And you being on me is not?" you argued, but he was unfazed. "Who made these rules?"
"I did," of course he did. "It's only fair that the strongest make the rules."
"You and your damn bragging-"
"I'm stating facts," he cut in, and you rolled your eyes, "and you can't seem to be able to prove me wrong. Not even one of your eager punches lands."
That was the last straw â you inhaled to calm your anger, and you could physically feel your composure snapping as you looked at his smiling face. You were desperate to prove him wrong, not to defeat him, no, you're not that insane, but to just prove him that he's not as untouchable as he says. And then you recalled every teasing joke you heard from your younger colleagues â all of them seemed to come to the collective conclusion that the 'special treatment' you got from your sensei was surely an effect of his feelings towards you, and you brushed off the idea every single time. Gojo Satoru is handsome, annoyingly so, and his eyes are an absolute blessing to gaze into (when you're not his opponent in a deadly encounter, that is), and he's a kind, friendly man, very caring and protective of his students. His strengths make him invincible; he can win any fight with no effort, and everything he does, he does perfectly. He often brings you sweets, remembering your favorite flavors, and he always addresses you with a slightly warmer tone than when he speaks to any other student. He's also ten years your senior, your teacher, and he's way out of your league, so you simply chose to dislike him because allowing yourself to believe in such an absurd theory that he could fall for you would only bring disappointment.
But now, you were desperate to slam your fist into his face, to draw blood from his nose, to make him lose his balance, to get somethingâ anything more than a swift, effortless dodge from him. Without thinking, you moved your head forward, reaching up, and he hummed in surprise when your lips landed on his. You could feel he smiled while taking control over the kiss, and you fought for dominance just a little before grabbing a handful of his snow-white, messy hair. You felt his well-built body pressing harder against yours, much smaller; the wall of muscle flush to your chest, and his large hand landed on the side of your neck, fingers curling around the back, pulling you more into the kiss. For a moment you were lost in the sensation â it felt so wrong and yet so right, and your mind became cloudy; his lips were soft and plush and perfect against yours, as if they'd been carved precisely to match yours, and it made your temperature rise to feverish levels at how skillfully he guided the sensitivity. Nothing you've ever felt compared to the feeling of Gojo's lips slowly dancing on yours, as if he's starving and now, he was allowed to devour the long-awaited meal â but he devoured it slowly, savoring the taste to remember every second of it. You whimpered as you felt his hand sliding down the length of your spine, sending shivers along it as your back arched beneath the touch.
You tugged at his hair, causing a contented purr to rumble within his toned chest, and you moved against your body's desires. You'd like to stay like this forever, careless about how everyone can see you publicly making out with your sensei; you'd like to kiss him longer, deeper, to take more of him, to make him yours, even if only for a moment, but instead you moved your hand. Curling it into a fist, you bit onto his lower lip following it up with a harsh, heavy punch to the side of his face and it landed perfectly, the contact between your knuckles and his cheek undeniable as he touched the bone. Despite the force you put into it, the blow wasn't strong enough to make him fall or even step back, but it was satisfactory for you. His face was colored with surprise as he looked down at you, and you couldn't help but grin broadly.
"New rule," he said, grabbing your hand and planting a kiss on the reddened knuckles that just made contact with his face. "No kissing your teacher during spar sessions."
"Too bad I wasn't familiarized with the rules before the fight, sensei," you shrugged, pleased with your accomplishment, and he couldn't get over the way you made the word 'sensei' sound. Suddenly he wished to hear it somewhere else, somewhere other than the school's training grounds or classrooms.
"Now I declare the end of the training."
And Satoru's lips were once again pressed to yours, taking your breath away.
Âť PART TWO
#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jjk imagines#jujutsu kaisen imagines#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen x you#gojo satoru fluff#gojo satoru x reader#gojo fluff#gojo x reader#gojo satoru imagines#gojo imagines#gojo satoru#jjk fanfiction#jujutsu kaisen fanfiction#jujutsu kaisen#gojo!teacher#gojo teacher#gojo satoru!teacher#jjk teacher#jujutsu kaisen teacher#jjk sfw#gojo sensei#gojo#gojo x you#gojo thirst#jjk gojo#gojo fanfic
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pairing(s): prince! Arthur Leclerc x male! knight! reader
warning(s): mentions of injury, mentions of death, royal au! forbidden romance(?), angst
(a/n): a lot of backstory and angst. also this was inspired the moodboard i made. and inspired by the songâ sign of the times by harry styles. also the dynamic was kind of inspired by patrochilles from tsoa.
wc: 1.6k
!not proofread!
"Y/n! Uncle!"
You hear the high-pitched voice of a young boy. On turning around, you see him running towards you. But he never reaches you.
You let out a sigh. Seeing Arthur trip on his own feet was not an uncommon sight for you. You could never understand how a prince could be so clumsy. You walk over towards him, helping the poor boy up.
"Prince Arthur," your father greets him with a small smile.
"Uncle!" the younger beams.
"What brings you here, your Highness?" your father asks him, curious about why the youngest prince was near the soldier's quarters, which happened to be on the opposite side of the Prince's room.
Arthur stills for a second, gathering his thoughts. "My father has requested your presence. He said something about- about-" He trails off, not remembering the rest of what his father had said.
Your father smiles down at him. You didn't know what he found amusing about him. Your father turns to you, giving you a small smile, "I have to go. Please take care of Prince Arthur and escort him back to his room."
"Yes, father."
---
You look around the hallways as you walk behind the youngest prince. The royal quarters were completely different from what you were used to.
Arthur's room soon comes into your field of vision. It was only a few paces down Prince Charles'. "Do you want to come in?" he asks excitedly, eager to show you the new toys his father had brought from his recent travels.
You accept his request. It's not like you could say no to a Prince; you were a nobody compared to him.
---
You had been practicing your sword skills near the river bank before you were disturbed by the presence of another person. It took you a second to recognize him. After all, you didn't expect him to be here.Â
"Hello!" he said after spotting you, his eyes full of innocence and with the biggest smile on his face.Â
"Your Highness," you bow, just like you were taught to. He frowned, he never liked how you treated him like a prince. He wanted to be your friend, and friends don't bow to each other. Or act like one was superior.
He quickly changed the topic, asking you to teach him some of your sword moves.
"You have a trainer already," you pointed out, "appointed by the king."
"But I don't like him," he replied, pouting like a child. You sometimes forget that he's a prince. From what you were told, a prince shouldn't act this way. Maybe he got away with it because he was the youngest, you wondered.
"I'm not a teacher," you replied, hoping the annoying boy would go away already. "But you could teach a friend!" Arthur replied happily. You take a moment to answer. "You're a prince. We can not be friends." You walk away from the river, going back to the soldier's quarters.
Arthur watched you walk away from him. He didn't understand why you disliked him so much. All he wanted was a friend.
---
You were appointed to accompany the youngest prince while he went to the local bazaar. He wouldn't let anyone else accompany him and of course, the king couldn't let him go alone.
Arthur had made it known that you would be the only one he would allow to be near him. So upon receiving direct orders from the King, you couldn't exactly say no.
---
His eyes beg you. Trying to covey the words his mouth couldn't. Was it selfish of him? To want you to stay when the kingdom was under attack? He searches your eyes. What was he trying to find?
You step closer to him. Your hand gently cups his face, bringing him closer, till your foreheads touch.
"I have to go," you whisper, your breath tickling his face. A lump forms in his throat. He doesn't want you to leave.
His stomach churns at the thoughts that cross his mind. The 'what if' scenarios running through his mind. He can't shake off this feeling he has.
"Don't." It's so quiet you barely hear it. "Please."
"My Prince." You pull him into your embrace, gently tucking his face in the curve of your neck. One of your hands around his back, the other supporting his head.
"My love," you try to console him. It hurt you to see him like that. It hurt you the most to know you were the reason for his current state.Â
"At least..." he tries to say before his own sobs cut him off. "At least stay the night."Â
You look at Arthur. He was clutching your vest, scared that if he let go, you would leave. He reminded you of the young boy you had met all those years ago.Â
The clumsy little boy, who used to run around the palace barefoot, tripping so often that his arms and legs were scattered in scars.Â
The determined little boy, who used to beg you to teach him how to fight because he didn't think he was strong enough to deserve the title of prince. The smart little boy, who taught you how to read and write, something you had never learned because a soldier had no use for such things.
The caring little boy, who stayed up all night once to look after you after you had caught a severe cold.
The sensitive little boy, who cried when he found a dead butterfly in the garden. You didn't have the heart to tell him that those things barely lived for a few weeks. The brave little boy, who fought his father, the king, because the king forbade him from spending time together with lowlifes.
You smile at the memory. Arthur had fought his own father all because he called you a lowlife. You knew your place in the system. It wasn't the first time you had heard such a thing. It's what you were so you didn't ever consider it an insult.Â
But seeing Arthur defend you like that, against the king of all people, had really made you see him in a new life.
You tighten your arms around him. You didn't want to leave him here. But this was a war the kingdom couldn't afford to lose. Things had been especially tough on the frontlines.Â
"Of course, my love," you reply softly, pressing a lingering kiss to the top of his head.Â
---
Arthur woke up the next day to an empty bed. You were nowhere to be seen. Deep inside, he knew you had already left. You were probably about to reach the battlegrounds.
He rolled over to your side of the bed. At least that's what he had been calling it ever since you had started spending the nights in his room. It was already cold.
He tried to sleep again, to get away from the thoughts clouding his mind but to no avail.
Something caught his eye. It was sitting on top of the nightstand. He reached out grabbing the small piece of jewelry.
He recognized it. It was a simple silver chain with your birthstone hanging from it. It was the most precious thing you had. You had told him once. A gift from your late mother.
He carefully wrapped his fingers around it. He knew how much it meant to you. It was your treasure and you had left it in his care. He brought the necklace closer to him. Like he was holding a piece of you.Â
He curled up in a ball, weeping quietly. The reality of the situation hit him. There was only one instance he could think of where you would leave behind your most treasured necklace.
---
The Sun had already settled for the day. The stars, shining like little gems in the blanket of darkness. It had been a long day for the two young boys. Sweaty and tired, they laid in the freshly trimmed grass.Â
"You did good today." the shorter of the two turned his head to look at his companion. You had never been the first to start a conversation with him, much less compliment him. Arthur felt himself turning red as you laid there oblivious.Â
"Thanks," he meeked out. He turned to look at you once again. Your had laid comfortably on the ground, your eyes closed, the moon that had previously been hiding behind the clouds was now shining its luminance onto you.Â
Heavenly. You looked heavenly. It was the only way he could describe you. He closed his eyes, taking in the smell of the grass surrounding him, and of the blooming flowers through the wind. the sound of the leaves rattling, and you.
"I want to learn life with you."
You opened your eyes slowly. It had been so quiet that you barely heard it. You turned to the boy next to you. Or rather the man next to you. He was fifteen, turning sixteen in a few weeks.Â
He was no longer the clumsy little boy you had met. He fitted into his role as the prince perfectly. He knew how to fight now. He was attending meetings when his brothers couldn't. His opinions were heard in the council. Everyone had acknowledged him as a man, as a dutiful prince.Â
He had even changed physically. He was taller than you remembered. Stronger, even. His muscles were starting to show. His voice was slightly deeper. His hair was longer. He had grown. Before you knew it, a smile had appeared on your face.Â
---
He holds the letter close to him, the edges of the paper crumbling under his fingers. The tears staining the paper. It was written in a hurry, he could tell. Addressed to him, sitting neatly on the nightstand next to your necklace.
He wailed.
Please forgive me, my prince. I would not be there to accompany you till the end. I wish it didn't had to end like this. I wish I got learn more of life with you.
I hope we can meet again somewhere. Somewhere far away from here. Maybe in the after life. Until then, take care of yourself, my love.
Love,
Your Knight
(a/n): i've written after soooo many months so its kinda weird and all over the place. and a little rushed. I'll get better when i start writing more eventually i promiseđ¤đźi still hope you guys enjoyed it
#formula 1 x reader#f1 x reader#f1 x male reader#formula 1 x male reader#arthur leclerc x reader#arthur leclerc x male reader#leoâs works#leosxrealm#formula 2 x reader#f2 x reader#f2 x male reader#formula 2 x male reader#x male reader#angst#male reader
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Too sweet
Alastor x gn reader,
Warnings!!
Mild ooc, reader is dessert themed also kinda imagining they have eyes that resemble 1930's animation but that's just me, casual backstory drop in the middle that's just never brought up again, death, pacing is a little off, Alastor is prepared with angelic steel this time! It does not help whatsoever!
Song: Too sweet
It wasn't a secret that Alastor strongly disliked sweet things, it wasn't a complete hatred but he wouldn't willingly eat any, he preferred bitter things.
It can't be said I'm an early bird
You were as sweet as pure sugar, with that oh so charming smile of yours, your big ol' cartoony eyes, eccentric and positive attitude, not to mention you were quite literally dessert themed, Cake themed outfits, frosted purses, phone case adorned with spackled frosting, sprinkles and charms.
It's ten o'clock before I say a word
You were the most recent addition to the hotel, a few of the hotel's residents didn't quite understand how someone as sweet as you could've ended up in hell, it was theorized that maybe it was an act, a honey coated trap that would lead to the hotel demise or something.
Baby, I can never tell
That was thrown out rather quickly when you kept the same sweetheart persona even when alone, it was just how you were.
How do you sleep so well?
It was concerning to a certain few hotel residents when it was discovered that you had a thing for the Radio demon,
The way your eyes would linger on him for a moment too long, the way you would gaze at him love evident in your eyes.
You keep telling me to live right
Husk gave you a warning one night at the bar, you were sipping on a drink that had more sugar then any drink should, he was cleaning up the bar.
"Look kid, Alastor is a bad decision, this won't end well for you."
"I know." You had responded, twirling around that sickly sweet drink of yours
You weren't naive like your personality seemed to make people think, you knew Alastor was a bad idea, bad news, he was a cannibalistic murderer for heaven's sake!
To go to bed before the daylight
But it was alright to have a small crush that you wouldn't act on, it'd pass eventually but for now it wasn't bad to fantasize about dancing with him, cooking together or about doing something unholy like handholding! Nothing would become of it, you didn't have a good history with relationships anyways.
But then you wake up for the sunrise
Charlie was supportive of your little crush, she had found out about it after accidentally overhearing you drunkenly tell Angel Dust about it, that sugary little drink really did a number on you.
She decided she would try to push you and Alastor together, gently, She was such a great wingman!
After all Alastor tolerated you more than anyone else in the hotel so that's a indication that you might have a chance right? A truly slim one but a chance nonetheless!
You know you don't gotta pretend, baby, now and then
When Alastor began enjoying your company a little too much for his liking it was like he, from his prospective had been thrown into a horror movie and trapped with little to no way out.
He enjoyed some of your antics and reactions.
Don't you just wanna wake up, dark as a lake?
You were helpful around the hotel, helping out with advertising, you'd proofread scripts he had written for his radio broadcast, every time you went out for a treat you brought back some type of pastry or snack for the hotel residents, in particular you'd travel all the way to cannibal town to pick up something for Alastor, you didn't have too, but you did.
Smelling like a bonfire, lost in a haze?
As time went on the feelings didn't fade, especially since Charlie heavily suggested that the two of you should work together on hotel related things, and that pinwheeled into the two of you spending more time together, getting closer, and eventually you began to avoid Alastor, you had a tendency to ditch the people you were fond of in a way usually in a cruel fashion, you didn't mean too, truly! But you did and you didn't want to risk it with Alastor for his sake and yours.
If you're drunk on life, babe, I think it's great
You were a known partier back in your day, you died back in the heights of the roaring twenties where you had the money and privileges to go to lavish parties where anyone who was anyone could attend much like the parties Gatsby held in the great Gatsby, you lived what some folks thought the roaring twenties were all about, Flappers, speakeasies, parties and short-lived prosperity.
You were in your twenties, rebellious and reckless, drinking any drink given to you, playing around with people's emotions with those sickly sweet words of yours, taking whatever substance you were given, and a year before the stock market crash, you were found dead on the dancefloor poisoned by a former darling of yours who didn't like that you had left them because things were getting 'too serious' for you.
You didn't handle death well, and in order to keep at least some of your sanity you went to hurling yourself onto the hellish party scene, frequenting speakeasies, trying to keep some sense of what you knew, repeating harmful cycles, but you couldn't do it forever.
And so you gave up the party scene around the mid 40's, burning bridges and leaving behind many scorned people behind.
You were more unstable back then, but you had improved, at least you thought you did taking up the sweet attitude by a couple notches, switching from drinking alcohol each day to drinking sweet smoothies or milkshakes.
You cleaned up your act and you were continuing to keep it clean especially as you checked into the hotel.
No one there knew about your track record and you would like to keep it that way.
But while in this world
The avoidance didn't last long since Alastor cornered you asking why and you blabbered out your feelings in one big ramble.
And that was that.
I think I'll take my whiskey neat
Charlie was ecstatic to learn that you and Alastor had gotten together, Others were concerned particularly Husk, his bets were that either Alastor would end up owning your soul, you'd become just as twisted as Al or you'd end up dead.
None of them would end well for you.
My coffee black and my bed at three
The two of you were opposites, while he took his coffee black and bitter you loaded yours up with milk, sugar and whatever other toppings you wished, when he stayed awake for multiple days in end you snoozed away at night, when he was threatening someone who was messing with the hotel you were trying to defuse the situation with sweet words.
You're too sweet for me
Alastor didn't like sweet things, but he didn't mind you and your sugary sweetness, infact you could say he was growing a little bit of a sweet tooth.
Just the sight of your sweet little smile was enough to cause a slight ache in his heart and that fact that you could be called his now was just wonderful!
You're too sweet for me
He could see himself getting used to all this sweetness, he just needed to make sure no one knew that.
I take my whiskey neat
You smiled, listening intently and sipping on your sweet alcoholic drink while Alastor recounted an encounter he had, a glass of whiskey in his hand whooshing around as he spoke.
My coffee black and my bed at three
It was after a hotel game night mixed with alcohol, the two of you were tired and intoxicated, you were a giggly drunk, laughing at the most mundane things, Alastor was escorting you to your room and much to his surprise it was a challenge as you would stop every few steps to laugh at how the crack in the wall looked like a giraffe or how that stain on the carpet looked like a birthday cake!
You're too sweet for me
By the time he had finally gotten you to your room he was exhausted, you kicked off your shoes leaving them on your floor as you dived into your bed, reveling in the comfortable blankets.
Alastor rolled his eyes as he entered your room leaning down to pick up your discarded shoes to properly put them away in your woredrob, he intended to leave to his own room but you reached out your arms to him making grabby hands, he walked over and leaned in to see what you wanted only for you to suddenly grab him, pulling him down and covering him in the blankets before promptly passing out with your arm wrapped around one of his.
You're too sweet for me
He was going to get up, he truly was but he hadn't slept in hell knows how many days now, and the bed was warm, before he knew it his eyelids were drooped. His shadow thankfully decided to close the door to your room.
I aim low, I aim true and the ground's where I go
The next morning he was greeted by you humming while gently petting his fluffy ears, he wasn't sure you knew he was awake at that point, but he rather liked having his ears petted, at least by you and it wouldn't hurt to savor this moment for just a few more minutes before the two of you would have to deal with the duties that the day held for you.
I work late where I'm free from the phone, and the job gets done
Alastor preferred to have his radio broadcast aired in the morning but sometimes he wouldn't get the chance too, [Maybe he indulged a little too much in his morning time with you]
He would air around eight pm and sometimes you would hang around his tower, doing whatever activity you had brought along until he was done and the two of you would walk back to the hotel, maybe grabbing a bite to eat.
But you worry some, I know
Other nights you would turn on the radio in his room and curl up in a blanket on the leather chair he had, closing your eyes and listening to his oddly soothing voice.
But who wants to live forever, babe?
Alastor didn't particularly believe that heavens gates would accept sinners even if they were redeemed, but nothing is impossible and he, although he doubted it, could be wrong and the Hazbin hotel could be a success in redeeming sinners left and right and you were one of the residents checked in for redemption.
You treat your mouth as if it's Heaven's gate
Alastor moved a piece of your hair away from your face, careful not to disturb your sleeping position on his chair, he could admit to himself that he had gotten attached to you, and he couldn't just have his darling little partner leave him behind to fraternize with the winners above now could he?
The rest of you like you're the TSA
He picked you up from the chair and moved you over to his bed, tucking you in.
If anyone in this damned place could get redeemed it was you.
I wish that I could go along, babe, don't get me wrong
And Alastor, well he wasn't the type to be looking for redemption or redeemed, he was even less of the type to blindly follow someone somewhere even if it was you.
He did wish he could see his mother who obviously was in heaven but that simply just wasn't in the cards for him, it was tragic but he did murder people, he died while burying a body after all!
You know, you're bright as the morning, as soft as the rain
Alastor cut into the dead deer he had just sat on his table, he was about to take a bite when he caught a glimpse of you shooting up from his bed looking around in hasty panic before you visibly calmed at the sight of him, with one of your signature surgery sweet smiles that caused swirls in his heart you bid him a good morning.
Pretty as a vine, as sweet as a grape
Alastor strolled into the hotel after a day of errands, only to see everyone cluttered together looking at something you were holding that he couldn't see, you noticed him and waved him over, grinning as you held the red creature in your arms that looked strikingly like Alastor, you went on a small tangent about how you had found the little guy while taking a stroll around the hotel.
If you can sit in a barrel, maybe I'll wait
In all honesty he wanted to hurl the creature out the window but you were stubborn in saying that the two of you should keep the catlike creature immediately dubbing it as your son much to Alastor's displeasure.
Until that day
He and the little creature begun a little rivalry, whenever he had his arm around you that thing would try and headbutt it off.
On the plus side you had taken to dressing the little one up in ridiculous little outfits, usually to match you or Alastor, from dessert themed outfits to Alastor's signature suit.
The creature did not like being dressed the majority of the time as the little thing felt it was taken less seriously thanks to the outfits.
It was right, when the little one would strut around the hotel he was usually awe'd over by Charlie and Sir Pentious.
I'd rather take my whiskey neat
Time flew by as extermination day drew closer, preparing became the focus in the hotel, coating weapons in angelic steel, in particular you had a axe that you covered with dessert themed charms finding it funny, because imagine getting taken out with a dessert themed axe of all things!
My coffee black and my bed at three
You had just barely convinced Alastor to prepare to use an angelic weapon, borderline begging him to do so, you didn't know what you'd do if he got taken out or injured because he was too prideful and foolish to use angelic steel in some way.
You're too sweet for me
He just couldn't say no to you when you looked at him with those cartoonish eyes that reminded him of 1930's animation and surgery sweet smile!
You're too sweet for me
It was the night before extermination, everyone was ready, living this night as if they were going to die tomorrow, which they probably will but they had something to fight for! You indulged on the classic surgery sweet drink that you always got, sipping on it as Niffty declared Alastor king roach leading to you chuckling.
I take my whiskey neat
It was the time where everyone retired, laying in bed you gently brushed a hand through his awful haircut, the two of you chatted about what could happen tomorrow and what the two of you would do afterwards because obviously the two of you didn't intend on dying.
You let out a yawn, deciding to call it a night you gave Alastor a light peck before laying your head on your pillow.
My coffee black and my bed at three
Alastor channeled his inner Edward Cullen and watched you sleep, blanket curled around you, that little creature was snoozing by you, dressed in a onesie that you had obviously put on him.
He didn't say it often, or at all honesty but he adored you, the only sweet thing he would willingly indulge in.
He would do anything to protect you, you would survive the extermination, he would make sure of it.
You're too sweet for me
He, infact did not make sure of it.
It was during his little encounter with Adam, the first man had gone to attack him but you had ran in, taking the hit for Alastor.
Resulting in a large gash in your stomach, blood pooled around you as Alastor got a few hits on Adam before turning to you, clutching your body as shadows overtook the two of you, taking you to his radio tower.
You're too sweet for me
Alastor scrambled, his usual composed self gone as you were actively bleeding out, he tried to stop the bleeding but you had already lost too much.
I take my whiskey neat
He held you as he demanded to know why the hell you would jump Infront of him.
You simply smiled, lifting your hand to touch his face, you said three simple words that would be your last, the last thing you saw was Alastor's strained smile.
My coffee black and my bed at three
Husk was right, it would end one of three ways, either Alastor ended up with your soul, you became just as twisted or you died.
And many died that day, the hazbin hotel lost two of its residents, Sir Pentious and you.
Sir Pentious had died for his friends and you had died for the person you loved, sacrifices that landed the two of you into heaven.
You're too sweet for me
Alastor sat in his newly built radio tower, that damned creature that you had brought by his side.
He had managed to survive the hotel collapsing, good for him, unfortunately the person that brought him there didn't survive, and now he was stuck with Alastor, but maybe that wasn't such a bad thing anymore.
You're too sweet for me
Alastor despised sweet things, they were filled with sickly sweet sugar that would leave cavities behind in it's wake, even after being brushed away it would still leave some damage like you did, you left him like you had left others before only this time it was unwillingly, you were the sweetest thing he'd ever known, he made a unfortunately decision to get attached to you and now he paid the consequences, he would be unintentionally haunted by you, reminded of you every time he saw the portrait they hung of you in the hotel along with Sir Pentious or even with the cat that looked like him.
He wouldn't be making the mistake of falling for someone again that was for sure.
It's not like he could if he wanted to anyways.
Good evening folks! I hope you enjoyed this! I wrote it all in one day, I didn't write it because I got tired but the reader is totally fighting people to go back to Alastor, just "I JUST DIED AFTER TELLING HIM I LOVED HIM, THAT IS TRAUMATIZING"
#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel x you#alastor x reader#alastor x you#hazbin alastor x you#hazbin alastor x reader
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Hello! Itâs me! And Iâm back on my crossover bs again
A few years ago I had an idea for a Kirby demon slayer crossover but at the time my ideas for Meta Knight werenât fully fleshed out. You can read some more of my ideas in the read more!
So originally my idea was that Kirby was an extremely talented young urchin that Meta Knight picked up in a town or a forest somewhere. Meta is the last remaining member of the Star Estate, a group of talents swordsman in the Corps that was nearly completely wiped out within the last century. Meta Knight, finding Kirby, saw not only extreme power and raw potential, but also a way to revive the Star Estate through a young talent that may grow up to be even stronger than him.
This inevitably happens, but happens much sooner than Meta expects, when Kirby is only 10 years old. Kirby learns the Breathing Style of the stars that Meta teaches him, but also has a terrifying talent for mimicry, and is able to temporarily copy any Breathing Style that he witnesses. Having surpassed Meta Knight in power and rank, Kirby takes Meta Knightâs official seat among the Hashira. That said, Kirby doesnât have much of a mind for the more tactical and official side of the Corpsâs duties, so Meta tends to take over for him during meetings.
Reactions to Kirbyâs presence are mixed. Many of the Hashira bear some amount ill will against Meta, believing that Meta took in a child and trained him just to revive the seat of the Stars. They dislike that a child is fighting their battles for them, but have to begrudgingly acknowledge Kirbyâs sheer strength. This results in a lot of people being rather surprised at just how tenderly Meta Knight treats his little ward, buying him little gifts and souvenirs wherever they go and making sure that he is healthy and safe.
Similarly to Urokodaki, Meta wears a mask to conceal his face, since he has been told that his face is too kind or too soft for his profession. He has offered to make Kirby one as well, but a mask would not do much to hide Kirbyâs height and age anyways. Meta also carries two swords but only uses oneâ the second one is one of Kirbyâs spares, just in case Kirby accidentally forgets or loses his own. (This happened about three times before Meta Knight started carrying the spare around.)
In this au, Dedede is a prefectural governor who continued ruling over his land after the daimyo-ruled han were abolished for prefectures. He comes from a long line of aristocracy, and is aware of demons wandering around at night but doesnât get involved much with the demon slaying side of things. Meta is an old friend of his, and keeps him updated on recent local happenings with the demons.
Here are the two of them separately!
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â Chubby!reader x Sevika
CW : nsfw , prositiution , sub!reader , revealing clothes , bdsm , humiliation, some dub con elements
A/N : ive been having some weird dreams recently and i wanted to write them out, reader is chubby in the fic curvy hourglass with rolls specifly also im giving reader waist length hair
you were new to the brothel and had caught the eye of an older women. You eventually found out she was asking questions about you. you were diffent from the other workers, instead of being butt ass naked you wore a double slit dress that ran up your hip made out of silk, though it was a hard cloth to find but with enough connections to topside you can pretty much find anything you want. your stop being made with the same fabric. you didnt wear undergarments according to the uniform rules, you could techincly see everything leaving nothing to the imagination
you had scene sevika out of the corner of your eye several times when flirting with clients, even seen her walk by your room when in the middle of a session, she stared for aslong as she could before it was considered weird. finally the lady had requested you for her session. you wanted to impress her since, well she was hot and you have seen her around zaun, the way she fought and laughed when she won in gambling
so you had to give her the best time of her life. fourtunently with enough puppy eyes and asking, you discovered everything she liked and disliked from past workers who had her as a client.
you walked down the hallway and into your room, a small space yet still had charater, a couch in the middle pressed agianst the wall with overgrown plants. not expecting anyone yet you were suprised to see sevika sitting and smoking on your couch. "i think your my first client who doesnt smoke shimmer" you walked over to her
"theres a first for everything, baby" she put the ciggerette out on the couch sevika smirked as you sat next to her resting your elbow on the head of the couch. "ive seen you around the brothel" the scary lady looked over at you, bringing her mech hand to caress your thigh, "ive noticed" you say looking up from her hand. sevikas face quickly turned red
you raised your eyebrow as you grabbed her shoulders and hauled yourself on her lap, straddling her thighs. "ive also noticed your a tense person, has anyone helped you with that here?" you tilt you head "no. nobody. do you want to try your luck anyway , bunny?" she couldnt stare at anything but your clevage. "what do you do for work?" you asked, lifting her head up.
"is that a joke?"
sevikas voice is annoyed, you giggled "no," you looked off to the side "i know you work for silco but, what specificly do you do?" you leaned down both of your noses touching. "i wish i could tell you baby" sevika ran her hands further and further down you back eventually squeezing your ass
you were caught off gaurd, not paying attention to what her hands were doing "i-" you stutter "ive barely touched you and yet your speechless." sevika moved her hands to your chest as you slid your fingers down to her neck. her hands begining to squeeze your tits
"these are beautiful" she looked you in the eyes, dissapointed you leant back a little to slide your top off. she smirked, picking you up from her lap and onto your back, she moved her knee between your thighs. you hitched your breath "such a dirty slut" sevika cooed
your eyes widened looking up at her. no client has ever degraded you just alot of praise, sevika could tell it excited you, chuckling "so quiet," she teased, pressing her knee further agianst your warmth, every movement sevika made, you felt intoxicated and light headed
sevika rutted her thigh agianst your clit, "oh god" you move your hand to your mouth, sevika quickly pinned your hands above your head "i want everyone to hear you. that im treating you better then any asshole who walks in here"
sevika was able to pin you down with such ease. as she looked around the room, finding a pair of hand cuffs, she looked at you with that snarky grin, cuffing you quickly so she could get back to worshiping your body, she kissed your neck but the kisses turned into biting roughly, making you cry out in pain
she moved down to your chest, twisting and pinching your nipples. looking back up at you just to see your reactions, the way you whimpered and drooled made her go crazy. "so sensitive" she purred moving down to your hips, caressing them and running her finger over your strech marks
"everytime i see you, i want these to be shown." she rested her hand on your belly, "okay" you giggled, she grabbed your ankles and rested them on her shoulders, she grabbed your face roughly leaning in
your lips were almost touching, breathing eachothers air. you felt dizzy, looking up at the celing as she shoved her tounge in your mouth. she squeezed your cheeks, pulling away with a strig of saliva connecting your lips
she lifted your hips a little, moving your skirt out of the way "oh my god." she felt your sensitive clit "you really are nothing but a dirty slut" sevika pressed her mouth agianst your cunt, licking between your folds, you moan loudly in response as you pulled on the hand cuffs
you cried out closing your eyes, sevika flicked her tounge against your clit. you whimpered and squirmed, bucking your hips into her. "stay still, or are you to much of a pathetic slut to even comprahend such a simple task"
sevika put your hips and ankles down. giving you a breather before she pressed her fingers agianst your entrance. she started off on a quick pace, watching you struggle to hold back "dont cum" she growled stopping right when you felt the orgasm creep up. you cried out as she smirked.
"sevika" you looked at her face "please" you plead. "are you begging baby?" she chuckled starting a slow pace "let me cum please" you buck your hips "yeah?" she teased picking up the pace. you went still as the wave of pleasure drowned you. twitching slighty
sevika let you sit for a second before she moving her fingers your clit, rubbing in circular motions slowly you choked on tears. "are you crying?" she teased "what a cry baby, lets see how much you can handle"
you sob as she spead up. it was so overwhelming, as everthing slowed down after you hit your second orgasam. "oh god" you huff out as she moved her hand "you cant handle anything can you? you cum so fast" she licked her fingers before holding your face
"ill make sure to handle that next time"
sevika stood up covering your bare chest with her coat but leaving the handcuffs "wh- wait" you yell out for her as she walked away, she was about to leave the room before looking over at you with a grin on her face
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Hi! I recently discovered your blog, and Iâm loving it!
I wanted to share that one of my friends went to the Netflix party with Luke and Nicola in Brazil. Sheâs still over the moon about the experience, and it was definitely one of the best moments of her life. She told me she noticed how they take care of each other and constantly touched while talking, almost like a couple. We spent weeks discussing every little detail. My friend believes they either have something romantic going on or have had something in the past because the way they touch and look at each other isnât how friends typically interact. We all know this by now, of course.
Anyway, I also wanted to share that during my friendâs stay in Rio, one of the other girls invited by Netflix (whom we unfortunately know) was a nightmare throughout the trip. At the party, she claimed she was feeling unwell, was treated by the medical team, but we strongly suspect she pretended to be sick, thinking Luke or Nic would hold her hand. She also complained there was nothing to eat at the party, despite plenty of options, and got upset because she thought sheâd get a one-on-one moment with Luke and Nic.
A key detail: she hates the character Penelope. She had even made some posts on Twitter explaining why she didnât like Penelope (though she deleted them when Netflix invited her). She also used to post saying Nic was trying to steal the spotlight in Bridgerton and that the show gave her too much attention, neglecting the main family.
The day after the party, all the girls had to catch their flights home, but she didnât. She stayed longer in Rio to stalk Luke and Nic and even went to the restaurant where they were dining on their last night in the city. She tried to photograph them, but their security team didnât allow it and asked her to respect their privacy. In the end, this girl ended up asking for money online to get home.
I find it so disturbing how someone can dislike a person yet be so obsessed with them to the point of stalking.
Ew.
So psychotic fans are just rampant in Bridgerton?
I mean, I guess I knew this. If none of you have been on Twitter to see the tweets from people who legit believe Bridgerton is a real world with real people living in society today, it's eye opening how fucking wrapped up in a fictional world people can truly get.
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I just found your account, and I love your writing especially the ones with Geto!! (I love that man!!)I do apologize for asking but do think you would ever write more of chubby reader Geto? Especially the one where chubby darling is trying to make herself useful in his temple? I love that one especially!
I actually wanted to write a fic for that prompt for a LONG time but i never found the strength to finish it, so allow me to expand upon chubby reader who works in Geto's temple đ
CW: chubby fem reader, non-sorcerer reader, Geto refers to reader as a "monkey" once, allusion to suicide, bullying, the twins are around 10-12 yrs old, smut (mostly implied)
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Let's start by saying that you're nothing special. You are not the type of girl that Geto would see himself with. It would take a miracle for him to fall for someone like you.
And yet, miracles happen every day, don't they?
Your family has acquired some debt. They have been paying Geto to exorcise curses for them, and he has always delivered, but they have run low on funds and there's still a nasty curse to take care of. They beg and plead with him to remove it, but he refuses to lift a finger until they bring him a hefty donation again.
That's where you come in.
You can't see or sense curses, but you've felt their effects, dealing with the repurcussions of your family's awful attitude. This latest curse is the worst of them all, feeding off of every negative thing your family spews, weighing you down with their toxic energy. You'd do anything to get rid of it, to finally know peace again.
So you offer a trade. You promise to provide your services to the sorceror if he exorcises this curse for you and your family.
Geto ponders this deal for a while. He believes that monkeys are only good for providing curses or money, so he doesn't see the appeal of you at first. But then he remembers that he recently disposed of his maid because the twins disliked her, so he decides to make the deal. He will dispose of the curse if you act as his maid, cooking, cleaning, the works.
You have no other choice, so you accept.
The work itself isn't hard. Dusting, sweeping, mopping, polishing. You cook breakfast and dinner, lunch if requested. You're starting to get callouses from the work, but that's the least of your worries.
The twins hate you. You don't expect them to like a non-sorcerer like you, but they're cruel without reason. They tip over your mop bucket and run off laughing, they leave worms in your bed, they once took scissors to your hair and cut a piece off. They are awful, but you know you can't fight back. You have to take the high road, be the bigger person, endure their hatred so you can get by. If you step out of line, Geto will kill you without hesitation, you know this for a fact. So, you don't fight back. You show no reaction. You pray they get bored of you before you jump off the roof of the temple. At least then you would find peace.
The girls get into a fight one day. Nanako ripped Mimiko's doll as payback and now the both of them are sobbing and yelling at each other. You think it's karma for how they've treated you.
And yet, you take the high road once more.
You separate the girls first, sending Mimi to the kitchen and Nana to the living room. You quietly sew and mend Mimiko's doll, eyes watching you as you did so. Once the doll was fixed, you coaxed Nanako to take the doll to her sister and apologize. Surprisingly, she did so, and the girls hugged. They went on their merry way, not hurling insults at you for once. You go back to your chores.
The girls ask, no, demand lunch a few days later. You comply, making onigiri and cutting fruit into fun shapes, adding a cookie for dessert. The girls coo about the hearts and stars on their plates before digging in. They take their plates to the sink when they're finished and linger for a moment, staring at you. You ask what's wrong, but they scamper off before you can get an answer. You wash the dishes in silence.
Nanako falls and scrapes her knee on a rock. The other workers are shocked still, terrified of what Geto will do now that one of his precious girls has been injured, but you don't fret. You take action, bringing the young girl inside, grabbing a first aid kit, tending to her small wound. You clean it, apply a bandage. She requests a kiss to make it better, so you comply, pressing your lips gently against the bandage. She seems satisfied, getting up and running off with her sister again, throwing back a "thank you" as she does. You're surprised at her gratitude, but you think little of it.
You become a beacon of sorts. The other workers saw how well you handled Nanako's wound, and now they come to you whenever they don't know how to handle the twins. The girls are fighting? You are retrieved to break it up. They want lunch? You're always the one who makes it. They're getting ready for bed? You are now the one who ensures they brush their teeth, tucking them into bed before Geto bids them goodnight. You don't think much of your new role, chalking it up to just being a new part of your job that you have to take care of.
It's not until they call you "Mom" that you look at your role differently.
Mimiko calls you "Mom" first, after she finishes her lunch and puts her plate in the sink.
"Mom, I want a cookie."
You pause, frozen, processing what she said.
"Um... what do you say when you want something?" The young girl rolls her eyes.
"May I please have a cookie?" You smile softly at her compliance.
"Yes, you may." You take down the cookie jar, pulling out two and handing them to Mimiko. "Take one to your sister."
"Okay!" And she's off, leaving you to think about your new label.
Later that night, when you're tucking the girls into bed...
"Goodnight, Mom," Mimiko mumbles from below her sheets. You pause at the door, hand on the handle.
"Night, Mom," Nanako speaks up, hiding her face with her comforter. You swallow, inhaling deep.
"Goodnight, girls. Sleep tight."
You hesitantly close the door, hearing it click softly. You sigh, turning around, running into someone.
It was Geto. He stared down at you silently, eyes boring into you. You quickly bowed, moving out of his way, gaze glued to the floor. He watches you for a moment before grabbing the door handle, pushing the door open. You hear the girls chirp with delight as the door closes. Once it clicks shut, you bolt out of there, not looking back.
You become a maternal figure for the girls, someone they look up to, someone they rely on. You take care of them daily, tending to their every whim, scolding them gently when needed. The girls begin to follow you, insisting that you play with them, that you give them time and attention. Other people start taking on your chores so that you can entertain the twins and keep the peace.
At the same time, Geto starts to notice you more.
He notices how the girls light up when they talk about you, how they ask for you at night to read another chapter in their book, how they cling to you whenever they have a free moment. He thinks it's silly for them to enjoy the presence of a non-sorcerer such as yourself. Of all the people to become attached to, why you? There were plenty of socerer women that wandered these halls, so why did they choose you? What was so special about you?
It bothers him for a bit, but ultimately he's just happy that his girls are happy. He even began to appreciate your presence, your maternal instincts allowing you to care for the twins better than anyone else could. He came to value having you around to give his girls the love and attention they lacked when they were so young.
But there were other perks to having you around. Geto found himself delighted whenever you smiled, silently hoping you could direct that smile towards him. He began speaking with you casually, enjoying the sound of your voice more and more with each conversation. And you were attractive, to say the least, bright and lovely. He savoured being able to see a pretty thing like you so often, your round cheeks, your glittering eyes, your delicate hands, your bountiful hips. His mind began to wander to your body during his little meetings, wondering how soft you were under that cheap, coarse uniform. He imagined how your thighs would squish as you sat or kneeled before him, gazing up at him, willing to take whatever he would give you.
That's when he started fantasizing about you in earnest. He started thinking about you late at night, about your plump frame and how it would feel under his fingers. He thought about your thighs warming the sides of his face, your ass bouncing as he thrust into your, your mouth forming a perfect 'O' as you came over and over again. He thought of all of this as his hand trailed down his body, wrapping around his cock and tugging it, groaning at the sensation. You'd be so much better than his hand, soft and warm and wet. He wanted to feel you, to brace you against him, make you all his. God, what he'd give for just a taste of you.
He does this for a while. He doesn't know how much longer he can go. Maybe he'll make you his personal maid, have you draw him a bath, make you massage his scalp as he soaks. Maybe he'll be forward and tell you exactly what he wants. Maybe he'll force you into his bed; people will do anything if they're threatened properly. Maybe he'll woo you with gifts, perhaps a few dresses, maybe even a kimono, something traditional to match him. He's not sure, there's so many options, he can't decide.
The girls want to go to an aquarium. They want you to come along.
Maybe he could court you properly.
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