#I hope you don't mind a bit of diversity here

[fastbrain]

I couldn't resist creating some dad content for Fathers' Day here in Aus yesterday.

(The Reddit post with more Palia-related puns)

[lostcherise]

Know Your Place

pairing: ben/soldier boy x f!reader

summary: Ben isn't quite happy you get to boss him around, so he takes it upon himself to truly show you who's in charge.

tags/warnings: set in the 80s, just pure smut zero plot, soldier boy being a prick (a hot prick tho), dub con at first, dom!ben, rough sex, hair pulling, gagging, face fucking, choking, sir kink, creampie

word count: 3,741

a/n: you know the drill, not proofread yet but i'll get to it eventually. any feedback is welcome, i hope you enjoy reading as much as i did writing this.

The rhythmic clacking of your heels echoed throught the empty hallways of Vought Tower. Not a soul was around at that time of night, it was very well past 10P.M, the only remaining employees in the building being the night shift security guards and you.

Young and ambitious, you strived to fight your way to the top in the harsh cruel world of a male dominated corporation, and well, field in general. To say you hadn't been over the moon the moment you had gotten promoted to being Stan Edgar's right hand, his replacement when needed in supervising Payback, would have been an understatement.

However, the excitement soon fizzled out once you got an insight of how things truly operated within the corporation and the Payback team. Especially Soldier Boy. That man although downright handsome, he was just as much of a prick. It was fine being a simple assistant, your interactions were kept minimal, but along with the promotion came more time spent with the members of Payback.

With a deep sigh, you braced yourself before your fist made contact with the wooden door in a firm knock. You rolled your shoulders back, as if to seem more confident, when in reality anxiety was eating you up from the inside. The door forcefully swung open, causing a startled gasp to slip out of you.

"Well, sweetheart, I knew you'd come around eventually." Soldier Boy drawled. He stood tall and confident, his large frame towering over you, scandalously dressed in just a deep green silk robe - same shade as his suit.

You bit the inside of your cheek, fighting the urge to quip back, but that was not the reason you were there. "I'm here to talk business." you gave him a pointed look.

To your surprise, he silently stepped to the side motioning for you to come in and you did not miss the way his eyes traveled up and down as he took you in. As much as your mind fought to maintain control, your heart betrayed you and took over, heartbeat increasing. Heat rushed to your cheeks because you just knew he had heard that.

"I'm all ears, doll." you could hear the smug smirk on his voice.

"Listen, Soldier Boy-"

"Ben."

Your body whipped back to look at him. "What?"

"Call me Ben when we're alone." he commanded.

"Soldier- Ben." you corrected yourself immediately. "It's about your upcoming movie."

Immediately you were met with a groan, and Ben scowled at you as he made his way to his mini bar. "I've told that fucker Edgar millions of times, and I'm telling you this too." he pointed at your direction, a crystal tumbler in hand. "I'm not sharing the spotlight with that cum guzzler, Noir."

"It will improve your ratings, it's good for diversity."

Instead you were met with a condescending scoff. "Sweetheart, I don't need any of that," he inched closer to you, the ice clinking against the crystal walls of his glass with each step closer to you. "I'm fuckin' Soldier Boy."

"Why don't you get off your high horse and just do the fucking movie?" you snapped, shocking both him and you. Usually, you remained poised and collected, but the increasing stresses of the job were catching up to you.

"Excuse me?" he asked, looking up at you with a raised brow from the rim of his glass.

"As your boss-"

"No woman is the boss of me." he cut you off, before gulping down the rest of his drink.

That comment should have angered you more than it truly had, but over the years your skin had thickened this much you were practically immune to such words. Instead, it just riled you on even more. Call it stubborness, pride; you didn't care it just drove you to show that whatever men could do, you did it better.

"And yet, here I am." this time it was your turn to smirk smugly.

Ben inched closer to you, so close his spicy ambery scent engulfed you entirely. Once again, your heart betrayed you beating so hard as if it was fighting to burst out of your chest.

"And yet, too powerless to make me change my mind." Ben spoke in a low rumbling hum.

His body heat was pulling you in, itching to be engulfed by him. And although you knew better than to get linked with him in such way, your body ached to feel him; lust and curiosity were killing you.

Ben inched closer, an action that had you leaning in closer to him involuntarily, he was pulling you in like a magnet. "The answer's no sweetheart, give it up." he pulled back abruptly, his tone turning clipped in just a matter of seconds. With a pivot, he made his way over to the mini bar once more for a refill.

Frozen, you stood there for a few seconds before you snapped back to reality and marched off to where he stood.

"I've risked a lot to be in this position and I'm not going to allow a manchild like you jeopardize my job. So, accept the offer." your chest was heaving. Frankly, you didn't know where that sudden burst of bravery came from, but one thing you were sure of was that it was reckless; given the fact that Soldier Boy was a literal walking ticking time bomb.

The bottom of his glass clanked loudly against the marble counter top and it was only a matter of seconds before you found yourself pinned between him and the counter. While one hand gripped the edge of the counter, the other had your jaw in a tight hold.

His mossy green eyes were ablaze, glaring down on you. "Go on and act boss on those sack jugglers, but that attitude won't work on me."

The way his body was pressed against you, your thigh somewhat between his - as much as your pencil skirt could allow you - his rough hands on you, should have ignited a sense of fear in you. Oddly, it had the opposite effect and your skin sizzled beneath his calloused fingers, your imagination jumping wildly at pictures you were painting in your head of what those very same fingers were capable of doing to you.

Involutarily, your legs spread just a little wider, which of course did not go unnoticed by Ben. Cocky and full of himself, he chuckled at your state, it was so easy to get you were he wanted and he hadn't even tried.

"What is it sweetheart? You want a taste, hm?" his hand traveled further down, enclosing around your throat, constricting your airway ever so slightly.

Forming a coherent answer seemed like a foreign concept, your mind screaming at you to say that this was wrong on so many levels, yet all you could muster to let out were weak whimpers.

Of course, to Ben that seemed enough of an affirmative answer and wasted no time in jumping into action. If it was even possible, he harshly pulled you closer, and you could feel all of him against you, hard all over.

"The things I keep thinking of doing to you every time I see the way you sway that sweet piece of ass in that tight skirt of yours," he grumbled in your ear and grabbed a handful of your left ass cheek in a tight squeeze. "Drives me mad, doll." he finished his sentence with an echoing slap on your ass that had you jumping with a yelp.

The same hand then moved up to grab a fistful of your hair, his fingers curling at the roots. "On your knees." he commanded, ushering you down by giving your hair a firm tug.

Right there and then was a perfect opportunity to get up and leave, yet your knees made contact with the cold marble floor beneath you, all the while your gaze never left his. You were pretty sure you looked like a deer caught in headlights, eyes wide and somewhat scared; scared of what was to come next, and yet that also riled you on even more.

Yes, you were aware of the hushed whispers shared amongst your female coworkers about him; of his skills in pleasuring women. Now it was your turn to see for yourself. Either you were going to hate this, or love this too much that no other man after him could compare.

"Be a good girl and use that mouth of yours for something good this time, hm?" Ben curled his top lip, pulling at your hair and forcing your head backwards to look at him.

Unable to speak, you simply nodded to which you earned a cocky smirk in response. Not bothering to strip completely, Ben simply pushed his robe aside, revealing his hardened length.

Of course that slut was naked under his robe, you thought to yourself, but your train of thought was cut short when you felt your head being pushed towards his cock. As if with a mind on its own, your mouth enclosed around his shaft, already halfway in, his angry tip hitting the back of your throat.

A guttural sound slipped past parted lips and Ben thrusted himself further down your throat, causing you to gag around him. He pulled you back by your hair and you coughed out and gasped for air. A few seconds passed before you found yourself in the same position, this time slackening your jaw to take in his girth better, his firm hold on the back of your head steadily keeping you in place.

His hips snapped in short, rhythmic thrusts as he fucked himself down your throat. "You take me so well, better than any other broad." Although the compliment was backhanded, it still managed to light up a fire within you, making your chest swell with a newfound wave of confidence.

You tried matching his frantic rhythim, bobbing your head along his length, pulling your head back whenever he pulled back his hips, meeting him again when he pushed deep in you, your nose burying in the short tuft of hair around the base of his cock.

A few more seconds passed and your eyes started brimming with tears as you struggled for breath, while also fighting back the feeling of the dull throbbing in your throat. You were definitely going to wake up with a sore throat in the morning.

Ben, seemingly lost in the throes of his pleasure, kept fucking into you, unaware of your struggle. Your hand found purchase on his strong thigh, giving it a series of firm squeezes to get his attention back to you.

He took one good look at you, at the state he had you in, all disheveled and teary eyed before he pulled out. He smiled pridefully and the sight of you like that made his cock twitch for more. "Up." he commanded, to which you immediately jumped up on your feet. A little dizzy, you braced yourself with your hands on his chest.

Ben's strong forearm wrapped beneath your bottom, lifting you up as if you were light as a feather. You held his gaze, all the while he carried you to his room.

In a swift motion, he threw you on the large Alaskan king bed adorning his large bedroom, and you fell lying on your side. You lifted yourself up on your knees, shaky fingers fumbling with the tie of his robe. "How do you want me?" you asked quietly, looking at him through your lashes.

"Oh, sweetheart," Ben cooed, bending down to grab your chin, the pad of his thumb toying with your bottom lip, then pushing inside your mouth to press against your tongue. "I'll have you any way I want."

At his words, your lips wrapped around his digit the same way they had wrapped around his cock. You pulled back, "Please." you let out a wanton whimper.

"Aren't you an eager one?" he chuckled, his hand moving down to grip around your throat, and pushing you down on the mattress in one swift motion. He followed suit, hovering over you and sizing you up as if he was a predator and you were his prey; he had you cornered right where he wanted you to be.

Immediately, your face flushed red, because yes you were being incredibly eager for him. You clearly weren't thinking straight, but that would be an issue to deal with for when you were no longer so horny.

"I need you inside me. Please, sir."

"Say that again." Ben's voice was so low it almost came out as a growl, his tone also full of lust.

"Please, sir, fuck me." you begged once more, your hands coming up to hold on to his strong forearm.

"Only because you asked so nicely."

He quickly removed his hand from your throat and forcefully ripping your shirt open, sending the buttons flying everywhere. His eyes were transfixed on the frantic up and down of your chest, watching the swells of your breasts moving with each sharp intake.

He mouthed at each one through the thin satin fabric of your bralette, feeling your nipples harden against his mouth. Albeit disappointed he didn't pay enough attention to your breasts, it was all lost on you the moment his hand slid up your skirt, between your thighs. His fingers wrapped around the fabric of your panties, bunching them at the center of your core, pulling them against you and causing much needed friction against your clit.

"Shit." you gasped out at the foreign sensation. No one had played with your clit like that. With each passing second, the fabric glided in between your folds with much ease as it was getting soaked with your slick.

"Gonna fucking wreck you." he groaned against your stomach, his teeth grazing your bare skin. "Think you can take it?"

"Yes. Yes, sir!" At this point you were panting like a bitch in heat. Your hands found their way in his sandy brown locks, tugging softly.

Ben remained silent, but his actions spoke louder than any words that could've been said. With one flick of his wrist, your panties were torn, leaving you in just your bra and skirt. His hand moved to do the same to your skirt, but in a tiny moment of clarity, your hand came over his. "Please don't rip this one, too."

Ben chuckled breathlessly, "You're no fun sweetheart." he chided, but complied nonetheless. In no mood for teasing, he quickly pulled the zipper down and slid your skirt down your thighs and past your ankles. His fingers then found their way on your cunt, sliding two fingers across your folds to gather up your slick, before plunging them deep inside you with no warning.

"Oh, shit." you moaned breathlessly; the pace of his fingers quickening inside you with every pulse of your muscles around them. Your whines raised in volume as he curled his fingertips, hitting the back of your pelvic bone.

His assault on your pussy went on for a few more seconds, until your slick was dripping down his knuckles, your pussy all prepped and ready to take him. With a lewd sound, he removed his fingers and moved them towards you, toying with your lips. Eagerly, you lapped up at his long digits, tasting yourself on him.

"Gonna fuckin' wreck you." Ben grunted heavily above you, lifting your left leg up and positioned your ankle on his strong shoulder, while you wrapped your right one around his waist.

With a shy smile, your hands reached to toy with the tie of his robe again, only this time your forefinger looped around the knot, undoing it in one swift motion. A shaky breath was caught in your throat the moment you finally took him in, in all his glory. He was so big and strong all over, it made your core ache for him in a way that had you questioning your sanity.

"I can take it, please."

You held your gaze with his, noticing the change in his eyes; how they darkened with desire. His plump lips curled into a smirk, he remained silent all the while he grabbed himself by the base, moving the tip of his length to align with your slit.

Your jaw slacked the moment his head pushed in. Ben moved deliberately slow, sheathing himself inside you inch by inch, until he bottomed out. You both groaned at the feeling, of how he was stretching you so perfectly, of how your pussy clamped up around him, engulfing and sucking him in.

His hand gripped around your thigh tight enough to bruise, bracing himself as he pulled out almost entirely, and pushing back in in one hard thrust. His movements repeated, growing more frequent with each thrust, yet the force remained the same.

After about five or six thrusts, Ben had set a steady pace that had you moaning beneath him; although at first the stretch of his cock hurt you a bit, it all melted down to pure pleasure.

Ben's free hand moved to pull your bra cups down, just enough so he could admire the way your breasts spilled out and bounced rhythmically with his every thrust. He delivered a couple of firm slaps on each one, your nipples tingled in pained bliss upon contact.

"Do it again."

"Ask nicely." Ben's hand gripped your jaw and keeping your head in place, forcing you to focus on him. Despite that, your eyes still rolled in the back of your head as Ben kept on fucking into you relentlessly, his pace never once faltering.

"Please, sir."

As much as Ben would love to keep you on the edge and beg for it more, he loved hearing the way you moaned and clenched around his cock more, so he gave in. He only stopped his assault on your breasts until they were red and sore to the touch and you kept begging for him to stop.

He grabbed your ankle off his shoulder, throwing it to the side so you were now flipped on your stomach and face first with the mattress. "Ass up, doll." he commanded, landing a firm slap to your ass. Silently, you obeyed, shimmying your hips further up, and arched your back in a perfect angle.

Ben's hands toyed with the fatness of your cheeks, massaging them and digging his fingers into the supple skin, and he spread them apart exposing yourself to him. He admired the way your pussy glistened in the dimly lit room and he pulled your cheeks just a bit further, transfixed by the way your walls clenched around nothing.

The tip of his cock rubbed against your folds, teasing your entrance before moving a bit further down to play with your hardened clit. He guided his cock back up to align with your entrance, plunging himself deep with ease. He was on one knee - the only time Ben ever saw himself on that position - having better leverage that way, being able to fuck into you much deeper.

He grunted behind you, loving the way you so eagerly bounced back on his cock, your hips meeting him halfway. You were a whining mess beneath him and he loved every second of it. Feeling very gracious, he moved one hand down between your legs, his middle finger finding its way to your clit expertly. His pace on your nub matched that of his hips and it was what drove you over the edge.

Your hands gripped the bed covers, and you buried your head deeper into the mattress to muffle the screams of pleasure that ripped through you. Tingles coursed through your body, all the way to your toes as that hot familiar feeling built up inside you. It was only seconds after when your back arched even deeper, and your pussy clamped up around Ben's thickness as your orgasm hit you in waves. His finger never once halted, only prolonging that warm blissful feeling that had your toes curling and your entire body shivering.

"Such a good girl, doin' so good f'me. Taking my cock so well." Ben praised you, only now he sounded the tiniest out of breath, indicating that he must be close to his own climax as well.

A few seconds later, your body began to relax as the aftershocks of your orgasm began to die down. His hand moved up to press your head roughly into the mattress, his hips snapping frantically into your needy cunt as he chased his own orgasm. The bed creaked beneath as Ben was fucking into you with such force, you were surprised you were able to take it, given his superhuman strength.

"Gonna fill you up so good." he moaned above you.

"God, yes. Yes!" you screamed, his balls were slapping against your overstimulated clit, driving you into your second orgasm. It came over you like the first one times 10, your entire body quaking as it pusled through you.

Ben's fingers curled around the roots of your hair, his grip on your head tightening and pushed you even deeper into the mattress. His hips slapped sloppily against yours for a few more thrusts, until they halted. His cock twitched and spilled his hot seed inside you, coating your walls white. He came hard and loud, his chest rumbling whilst he let out a deep guttural moan.

He pulled out with a groan, and admired the way his cum dripped out of your swollen pussy and onto the covers; truly a sight he'd never get tired of. He slumped back on he bed, resting against the headboard, only after grabbing a much needed blunt from his nightstand.

You hadn't moved much, only now you were sat up on your knees and eyed him, the way his hair fell over his eyes, the way his pecs shone with a light sheen of sweat. Ben caught your gaze, smirking at you as he blew a thin cloud of smoke, he studied how there was a sense of reluctancy written in your eyes.

With an outstretched hand, he offered you the blunt with a doubtful look in his eyes. Silently, you accepted without any second thoughts which only surprised Ben even more. Your eyes held a silent conversation with his, a new kind of tension loomed above the two of you.

Work was going to be interesting the next morning.

[rainbowbeanstyles]

I'm gonna share here these tips this psychologist shared with us fans grieving over Liam💔(the call was for spanish speaking fans, so I'm gonna try my best to translate it). A bit long.

Validate your own grief Many people won't understand, but your grief is completely natural and you should not be ashamed of it. Grief is when you experience the loss of something or someone significant/important in your life, doesn't always have to be a family member or friend. Don't reduce the artist to an everything or your childhood They are your memories, they happened and it was great when they did. Remember them in their true nature. Try to find where to place the artist. Do not lose sight of everything else around you because of this loss. Identify your role as a fan Try not to reach a limit where you find yourself in a parasocial relationship with the artist. Express and communicate your emotions You don't need to do it with someone else, you can also express and communicate your emotions by yourself. Don't bottle them up. You can talk alone, you can write on a journal, you can scream. As long as you let it all out. Find a group of supportive people People that you know will help you during these difficult moments. They don't have to be family or friends. Between fans, you are not alone🫂 Have a healthy and centered routine If you isolate yourself constantly, your mind will get used to thinking of grief only. Have a mixed/diverse rutine. It will feel really bad at first, but eventually your mind will assimilate it and start to clear up. Identify your reach as a fan Do not overwork yourself, try not to control everything. If a decision happened without your control, it's not your fault. Attend to your own needs and reactions Grief is personal. Think about the way your hurt feels and the way it's affecting you. Try to find the best way to handle this. Expose yourself to the artist gradually As the days pass, it's good to expose yourself to the artist so you don't develop a permanent fear. Gradually expose yourself to his content. You can start by pictures, listening to little bits of songs and his voice. One second, five seconds, litte by little. Remember his music as something nice, beautiful, something happy and it will help a lot. Don't let your emotions affect your future Our emotions distort our thoughts. "I'm never going to get over this / I will never be the same", those are emotional thoughts, you have them because of fear and/or sadness. Do not let them lead you. Ask yourself "Why am I struggling to accept this? Why am I scared?". Don't condemn yourself. Confront your problems, don't run away from them Try not to depend on artists or different content and having them as a complete safe space (HARD I KNOW). Think about what's making you want to run to this content for safety. Find solutions or ways to manage situations that make you want to "hide" or "run away".

That's it! I hope me sharing this helps at least a little, I know it helped me so I thought it'd be nice to share. I tried my best, if a tip confused you, you can ask me and I'll try to explain it better💌

Also the call had a lot of views! It was very sweet that all these fans got to find a space where their feelings were validated and understood:'( Take care everybody and I'm sending you a million more hugs.

[raekensluver]

Can you write anything where Spencer has a daughter and she tells him she has a girlfriend?

You can choose whether he will be a single parent or not.

And i need her to be bisexual plssss

don't fact check this !!

spencer reid x daughter!reader, no mention of what r looks like-only that she and spencer are father and daughter, 750+

the scent of curry wafted through the air as the door to the small, family-run indian restaurant creaked open. you stepped inside, the warm light spilling onto the sidewalk, and the sound of sizzling spices and laughter grew stronger. you took a deep breath, feeling the tension of the day melt away. the familiar smells and sounds were comforting, a stark contrast to the heavy secret you had been carrying around for weeks.

you had picked this place because it was a favorite of yours and your dad's, spencer reid. you had hoped that the nostalgia would help ease the conversation you were about to have. the walls were adorned with vibrant bollywood posters, and the low hum of music played in the background. the atmosphere was cozy, a contradiction to the turbulent thoughts in your head.

as you both slid into a booth, you fidgeted with the edge of the napkin, your heart pounding in your chest. you had rehearsed this moment a hundred times in your mind, but now that it was here, the words felt sticky on your tongue. your father looked up from the menu, his eyes meeting yours, and you knew it was now or never.

spencer sensed your anxiety and set down the laminated card. "what's on your mind, kiddo?" he asked gently, his brow furrowed in concern. you took a deep breath and looked into his eyes, searching for a hint of what his reaction might be.

"dad," you began, your voice wavering slightly, "i need to tell you something important." his gaze softened, his whole body leaning in slightly as he placed a hand on yours. "i'm bisexual," you said in a rush, as if the words had been trapped and could no longer be contained. the silence that followed was like a vacuum, pulling every sound from the room until all that remained was the steady tick of the wall clock.

spencer blinked, his hand squeezing yours reassuringly. "that's…that's wonderful, honey," he finally said, his voice a little shaky, but the smile on his face was genuine. "i'm proud of you, thank you for sharing this with me." relief flooded your system, your shoulders dropping as you realized he was okay with it. you took a deep breath, feeling the weight lift from your chest.

with a nervous laugh, you took a moment to compose yourself before continuing. "there's more, dad," you said, your eyes darting to the side to gauge his reaction. "i… i have a girlfriend." the words hung in the air, heavy with significance.

spencer's smile grew, a hint of surprise flickering in his eyes. "a girlfriend?" he repeated, his voice warm and curious. "that's great, i'm happy for you. what's her name?" he asked, his curiosity piqued.

you couldn't help but chuckle, feeling a bit of mischief bubbling up. "well, i don't know if i should tell you," you teased, playing coy. "i don't want you doing a background search on her or anything." you joked, trying to lighten the mood.

spencer's eyes twinkled with amusement as he leaned back into the booth, his laughter filling the space. "i promise, no fbi databases involved," he assured you, raising his other hand as if to take an oath. "but i do have a statistic for you, if you're interested."

his voice took on that familiar tone, the one you had heard countless times during family dinners, explaining a random fact he had just read in a book or article. "did you know," he began, "that bisexual people make up about fifty percent of the lgbtq+ community?" he paused for a moment, watching as you processed this information. "it's fascinating, really, how diverse human relationships can be."

you couldn't help but laugh, the tension in the air dissipating like mist in the sun. "only you, dad," you said, shaking your head in a mix of amusement and affection. "always with the 'did you know's." his cheeks flushed a little, a rare sight, and he chuckled, his hand still gently holding yours.

as the waiter approached to take your orders, you felt a warmth spread through your chest. you were so glad that spencer was your father, that you had someone so open-minded and supportive in your corner. you knew not everyone was so lucky. the conversation flowed easily as you both ordered your favorite dishes, and he talked about his latest case at work, but you could feel his eyes on you, a soft smile never leaving his lips.

kintober taglist: @multi-fandom-imagine, @imamexican, @majaduzejaja, @moony-artemis, @emma-e-a, @agoodgirlsguidetomakingmencry @indigoangel77, @froyofreya, @weirdothatwritess

[crowleysgirl56]

The vast majority of people who work on a show are paid upfront for their labour

They don't get paid dependent on how successful a show is

They also don't do work that doesn't get paid- if they are working on a show that gets cancelled, they get paid for the work they did

All this 'stream GO for the hard workers behind the scenes' is bullshit

They work for companies are will be put on different projects

Just be honest that you want more GO (despite the message that it sends to studios- that audiences are ok with abusers! Just turn a blind eye to them! Yes that gives them more power but who cares because people will watch and make them money!)

Don't pretend your doing this for moral reasons

(And acting like you're doing this for Terry- for all we know he might want his work with an abuser completely destroyed- it's stupid to assume he'd want the series to be continued)

Like say this shit with your chest, you know?

Oh boy, ok. Gonna take a minute to answer this.

Firstly, I and a lot of the fandom, are heartbroken over what NG has done. Because we were duped into thinking he was a decent person. From the things that he wrote to the things that he said we thought that he was good person. And it is horrible that there are people out there suffering because yet another rich powerful white man decided he had the right to take advantage of them.

You seem rather angry and if that anger stems because you have experienced something similar yourself then I hope you have love and support around you so that you can heel.

If you want to talk about money, let me remind you that NG has already been paid for season 3. He will continue to get royalties, and thanks to the writers strike last year, he will now get more money for those royalties than before. If S3 doesn’t go ahead then hundreds of people will lose their jobs. Will they get other jobs? Sure, maybe. But any loss of job in this current economic climate is terrible and stressful (and I’m not talking about DT or MS here. They’ll get more work).

I don’t know if you understand how hyper fixation in neurodiversity works, but this is extremely painful for some people and takes a lot of time and energy and therapy to get over when a hyper fixation is threatened or taken away. Some people, like myself, need closure for things otherwise we can find it extremely difficult to move on emotionally. This obviously does not compare to someone trying to survive after SA, but emotional diversity can be extremely debilitating as well. They are apples and oranges to compare, but you can’t invalidate one person’s pain because you think another person’s pain is worth more.

As for the show itself, there is so little queer representation in media. There is a lot more nowadays compared to a decade ago, or even 5 years ago, but the little representation we have is so extremely important. Do you know how many people have found a truth to themselves thanks to GO? How many people discovered something about themselves that finally gives them answer to how they feel? How at the age of 40 I finally realised that I’m asexual and NOT BROKEN. That’s fucking important.

And this. ALL of this is why everyone, including me, are so fucking angry with NG. Because he has left us emotionally devastated. He has not just physically hurt these women. He has emotionally hurt hundreds of thousands of people. He is a stain.

I have spoken before when this all first happened about how I was angry that my one teeny tiny corner of the internet that made me happy was on fire. I left for a bit. I came back. I want to continue to interact with like minded people who love this fandom. I won’t stop that.

And frankly, and here’s the last I’ll say on this, the world is on fire. It is filled with a lot of fucking awful shit right now. I have suffered a very deep depression of late where some nights after I put the kids to bed I just stare and cry. You don’t know that about me because I don’t say those kinds of things on the internet, because our internet personas are facades. They’re not real. They’re not true life. I’m a real person and I’m aching inside about so many things. And these kinds of messages are just breaking me further. Seriously, when you send stuff like this do you even consider that?! So when I decide to hold onto one of the last bastions of entertainment that brings me joy, I’m not going to be guilted into dropping it because someone involved happens to be a monster. Because let me tell you if we did that every time someone turned out to be horrible, then we would never watch or enjoy anything ever again. EVERYTHING you watch or listen to or enjoy or like or cared about is connected to someone who is horrible or produced by a gigantic evil corporation (Nestle, Disney, Microsoft, Facebook, Google just to name a few). Every. Single. Thing. It’s the clothing you wear, the electronics you buy, the food you eat, the furniture in your house, and ALL the entertainment you consume. So if you gave up everything for some moral stance, then you would literally have nothing left.

Dropping Good Omens does nothing. It sends no message to anyone because the next really fucking awful person is about to produce the next big thing you might happen to love and care about. So what’s the point?

Let me have Good Omens. You don’t like that, then you can block me. That’s what the button is there for. You don’t need to send anonymous hateful messages. And if you want me to “say this shit with my chest” maybe you can send me an ask with the Anonymous off. So I can see your chest too.

I’m turning off anonymous asks now. Considering the only asks I’ve ever received is abusive shit telling me to kill myself or saying David Tennant is a paedophile or just telling me I’m a horrible person for supporting NG (when I’ve already stated before that I don’t anymore).

Sorry for those who’ve managed to get to the end here. Thanks for reading if you have, sorry it was so long. I hope you aren’t receiving the same type of messages. If Anonymous has read this far, I don’t know, maybe think twice before being horrible to random people on the internet?

[cabi-leodrann]

Cabi! Big fan Joffrey here!

I wanted to ask, every time I see your art not only am I stunned by the quality, but also by the sheer uniqueness in style and character design. I've never seen a lamb designed quite like yours, it's so perfectly yours. What went into the inspiration behind the characters design, especially facially? Did you try and mimick a real lamb, or was there a more fantasy-element that you veered toward?

I can't specifically put my finger on it, but it gives me vague Warframe vibes. It's such a beautifully odd design and I can't get enough.

Love your work, love everything you do, can't wait to see what's next!

Hope you're well, stay safe, take care!

First of all, your ask is one of the biggest compliments I ever had in my life, I will keep it forever. You're an absolute chad! Second of all, those are very interesting questions, and I will be very happy to answer to them!

It started more or less with this drawing I made *look at the date* 2 years ago apparently. Way before I even thought of an AU- I didn't had much in mind, beside doing something that looked cool tbh.

I was very happy with the flow of it, and how it came out. And when I drew the Lamb again, I would try to nail THIS design.

The thing is, with time, I had a really big problem: Lamb looked way too young when I thought of them more as an adult. I had too much of the original game design guiding me, making a Lamb that was too cute and childlike for what I wanted. (And also, the head did not go well with the rest of the body holy shi-)

Came those drawings! I was happier with the look, Lamb was older! And I found the colored design quit nice! (I used a sheep picture as reference, but I don't think I used it well, compared to now. I used the reference for details, when I should have gone for overall shape first.) I still wanted something simpler to draw tho. The colored design was nice for an illustration, a one time gig, but I got pretty annoyed pretty fast at trying to nail the face every time. And from those attempt, you get the sketches on the right. (I also wanted to get away from other artiste's interpretation of Lamb, and at the time of those drawing, I didn't felt like I was away enough)

From those previous sketches, the idea for THaB started to emerge. I also still had problem with Lamb's design. Especially the hair. I was inspired by black hair, which is usually not a problem, but I was never happy with how it looked on Lamb specifically. I can draw black hair, I can draw black characters, but this mother-fucker would never feel satisfying to draw or finish 👀

And one day, as THaB was solidifying in my mind, I made a series of sketches that I posted! And one of them was the most important in Lamb's final design. This lil guy! (this design didn't came out of nowhere tho, Lamb was evolving into this as I kept trying. But I wont show those sketches, because those are spoilers =3)

And soon after, I made a comic that was supposed to only be a one shot, just a POV of Lamb and there reaction to Nari' telling them to die for him. But you know, things got out of hand lol

As I continued the comic and doodles on the side, I finally made myself a reference board, with real life images that were close to the vibe of this head drawing. (And I cannot stress enough how those references solidified Lamb's design as a whole. Draw with references, it is life changing. The more reference you get, the more your visual library will get diverse, and the more interesting detail and shape you will add to your art in general.) (I'd also add this: understand what you are drawing, make research and stay curious for every bit of info on everything. You never know when these nuggets of knowledge will help you as you create)

As I kept drawing the Lamb, they evolved! Things changed, slowly, like the shape of the nose, the shape of the eyes, how the hair flowed. You see those change at the face, but also on the body! As the idea of THaB's Lamb got clearer, the design got more specific. (I also got better at drawing! This comic make me draw way more often then before, and it shows)

Something before I finish: the other Cult of the Lamb character's design are way more inspired by their animals, when Lamb is more in the human spectrum. I thought of changing Lamb at some point, to make it fair/coherent, but I loved the design too much to change it again. This AU is something I do for fun, and even if it would have been more logical to change them... I don't want to-

As for the vague Warframe vibes: I play the game! And I found the character design absolutely stunning. So I am definitely influenced by the game without knowing it lol

Thank you very much, again, for your kind words! I also wish you the best, and see you next post =D

TL;DR: Lamb design, at first, wasn't inspired by much, beside the game and my style at the time. But as I retried to make them, added more intent, they got more refined. What really nailed the idea was to have real life references on the side.

[cripplecharacters]

how do you avoid tokenism if your cast is already really small? (ex. 5-10 characters). it’s a short comic/story/thing i’m working on and i want representation but i’m a bit worried about it coming off as tokenism

Hello,

Tokenism is about only making the bare minimum to appear interested in diversity or inclusion, but not actually delving any deeper.

This does often happen in a way where, for example, there is only 1 person with a certain marginalized characteristic in the cast. Like one black person amongst white people, or one woman in a cast of all men, or one disabled person among nondisabled people. But it's a little bit more than that. That one 'token' person is generally portrayed in a very stereotypical and superficial way.

When it comes to disabled characters that are tokenized in this way, often it's something like... the blind character is totally blind plays the piano and relies entirely on their hearing and requires everyone to describe colors to them and is the only person who befriends an 'ugly' creature because They Don't See The Difference, and no one shares basically any of their traits, and they never mention knowing anyone else who is blind. Basically, a list of tropes rather than a character with their own personality that meshes with the personality of the rest of the cast.

You can avoid tokenism by creating the character and actually keeping in mind how their disability (or any other marginalized characteristic, but we are a disability writing advice blog after all!) affects them and their life, and also giving them a life aside from that. You can make sure that they have relationships with the rest of the cast (good or bad!), that they have things in common with some of them, and that they have a fully formed personality that isn't just [insert disability here].

Something that can also help is the character mentioning someone else they've met that has a disability similar to them – like mentioning their cousin is also deaf, or that they met someone their age in physical therapy, or that they inherited their condition from their parent, and if you can mention a way that they are also different from your character too. Like, "Yeah, my best friend from elementary school had cerebral palsy too. She didn't need to use a wheelchair like me, but I did help her out whenever we had to use scissors."

Basically: Your character should be more than just a collection of Disability Tropes. They should be a person that fits within the cast, and as developed as anyone else.

Hope this helps,

– mod sparrow

[nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos]

Your Mihawk has me weak on my knees so I wanted to request something for him.

S/O has scars on her body, mainly on arms. She does fight but some of them look… too precise. One time after she loses a fight she is really pissed and nervous, she goes to a place alone. There he sees her just giving herself a scar with a knife on her arm. Turns out she was taught scars are signs of losses and if she doesn't get one in battle then afterwards she needs to do it herself. That's why she's so determined to always win. She hates scars.

@patisilence tagging since I'm not sure if you'll get this since I had to save it as a draft to format everything right.

Anyway.

I DID IT I ACTUALLY FINISHED IT

I'M SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG 😭😭

And I honestly really really want to thank you. This is my first ever fic-request, for one.

And also, writing this has been an absolute emotional rollercoaster. I have kind of a personal history with self-harm and I wanted to depict it as realistically as possible. Which resulted in heavy focus on character development, which resulted in this practically turning into a novella. I'm going to split it up into a few chapters to streamline things and link them all in this post.

If I do it right, then the entire thing should already be posted when I post this, but I'm still pretty new to Tumblr so bear with me. Each chapter should be between 3k-4k words.

And ALSO ALSO I've been planning a longer Mihawk X OC fic, and I really hope you don't mind me using this concept for it? Because it honestly ties a lot of things together for me

Soooooo without further ado, here's the whole author note thing.

Your Scars Are Mine

Ch. 1

LA! Mihawk X AFAB!Reader

Tags: Fluff, Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Graphic Mentions of Violence, I guess that's it, I'm bad at this

⚠️ MASSIVE ASS TRIGGER WARNINGS⚠️ : Self-harm, Blood, Implied PTSD

Summary: In the few months that he has known you, Mihawk has noticed the scars on your arm. You've refused to talk about them and skirted around the subject successfully, but a trip to Shells Town throws everything out into the open in a way that neither of you were prepared for.

Ch. 2

Ch.3

You were hiding something.

In the few months that Mihawk had known you, he had come to learn a fair bit about you. He knew, for instance, that you had over the past few years made something of a name for yourself as a sword for hire, typically among pirate crews who required a more discreet touch.

That this reputation of yours had led the Buggy Pirates to hire you to assist in stealing a map of the Grand Line from a Marine base in Shells Town. You had failed to procure the map before it was stolen by other hands, leaving you in their debt. Buggy had sunk your sloop to prevent your escape, and you had gotten stuck working for the ridiculous crew for a brief time, remained stuck with them until the Strawhat upstarts offered you passage with them.

Mihawk knew you had traveled with them as far as Baratie, where you had crossed his own path for the first time at the bar on the ship's deck. Where you had approached him with a bargain—if he left Roronoa Zoro alive after their duel the following morning, you would serve him for a year, an errand girl to send off on whatever menial tasks the World Government assigned him.

"And why would I want a little bird flitting around after me around for an entire year?" Mihawk had asked coolly.

And yet you had made a fair point—acting as a government lapdog was growing old. He had been sent after the vice admiral's grandson, for heavens' sake, as if he had nothing better to do with his time than to handle the old fool's family disputes.

Though the surly pirate warlord wouldn't have dared to dream of admitting it at the time, you had his attention. Your offer of unquestioned devotion, your confident demeanor as you sipped a glass of whiskey and kept your eyes on his without showing an ounce of fear or intimidation. You were certainly an interesting diversion from the otherwise dull task that had been laid before him, and your certainty that he would accept your offer had irritated and intrigued him in near equal measure.

It was intrigue that won out in the end. He had left his challenger clinging to the edge of life and taken you with him on his departure. You stayed toe to toe with him in wit and banter, and that alone would have been more than enough to draw him closer to your charm. He had wanted you before two weeks were out, wanted to claim you as far more than his "errand girl," and it was easy to see from the way you effortlessly returned his subtle flirtations that you wanted the same.

And now you were lying back across his broad chest in the hammock aboard your new sloop, a book open over your chest and his hand resting over your stomach, his other tucked under his neck as he frowned thoughtfully up at the roof of the small ship's cabin, pondering over the whirlwind of events that had led up to this moment.

It had been just over two months since the pirate lord had taken you as his lover, and you had been an open book about most things. Your training under your grandmother. Your setting out on your own from a small island village to find your parents, or some clue of their disappearance. The many and varied pirate crews you had served as a hired hand.

Yet you refused to discuss your scars.

Any seafarer with a history as sordid as your own had their share of battle scars. Mihawk had a fair few of his own; one didn't become the most renowned swordsman in the world without a few losses, after all. Yet your voice turned to clear contempt when yours were mentioned, even in passing, and you tensed like a statue when his hands brushed over them. You were confident to the point of near arrogance, yet you clearly held nothing but shame and contempt for the many marks that marred your delicate skin.

Some of which appeared oddly...uniform, for having been gained in battle.

It was in part—in great measure, honestly—the mystery of you that had drawn him in to begin with, and this was just another mystery that Mihawk intended to unravel.

You closed your book abruptly, stirring him from his thoughts as he glanced down at you. He watched you gaze thoughtfully toward the ceiling for a long moment, your hand resting over his at your stomach, before you finally spoke up.

"Reading a book is just staring at a dead tree and vividly hallucinating."

You tilted your head back, grinning as his mouth turned down in a frown and his brow furrowed at your ridiculous statement. Mihawk sighed wearily, plucking the book from your hands and lightly rapping you over the forehead with it.

"No," he scolded, as you giggled softly. He sighed heavily again, dropping the book over the back of the hammock before pinching at the bridge of his nose. "Are you trying to give me a stroke?"

"No," you said, imitating his scolding tone. You stretched your arms out over your head, arching your back for a moment, before rolling over to lay across his chest and brush your lips to his. "But it's fun seeing the look on your face."

"You irritate my very soul, little one," he said, shaking his head as he wrapped his arms around your waist.

"And I enjoy every second of it," you countered, grinning as you laid your forehead against his.

"I can tell."

Your grin managed to draw a small smile from him, before he lifted a hand into your hair and pulled you down into a slow, deep kiss. Your fingertips came to rest at his broad shoulders, the hammock swaying slowly in the steady ocean waves carrying the ship along. He knew as well as you did that he wasn't honestly irritated—your strange sense of humor had grown on him, as starkly as it contrasted to his dry sarcasm, and he rarely had the pleasure of meeting anyone as adept at keeping up with his own banter.

You lay your cheek at his shoulder when your lips parted, your eyes slipping shut and your contented sigh tickling against his neck.

"If the wind holds steady it will be a few hours before we make port," you said, your voice low and soft. "I suggest we don't move from here in the meantime."

"I'm not sure I've ever heard a finer suggestion."

Mihawk pulled one of your hands to his lips, brushing a kiss across your knuckles. He pulled his hat down over his eyes to block out the sun pouring through the windows of the small cabin, tucked his hand back behind his neck again, and shifted beneath you to get comfortable as he closed his eyes. His arm remained curled around your waist, his hand slipping just beneath the hem of your shirt so his thumb could rub slow circles over your soft skin as you both drifted off toward the peaceful recess of sleep.

The first thing that struck Mihawk when he woke was that you weren't in his arms.

Every day and night for nearly two months, he had fallen asleep and woken with you against him, and the absence of your warmth jarred him instantly awake and aware. His eyes scanned around his surroundings as he sat up, taking in where he was—the small cabin of the sloop he had recently bought you as a replacement for the one Buggy's crew had sunk.

His sharp yellow eyes darted toward the door, taking in the sound of unfamiliar, muffled voices outside the cabin.

He was standing in an instant, straightening his hat and pulling Yoru onto his back as he slipped silently through the door and onto the small deck of the sloop.

There was another sloop tethered to yours.

A pair of no-name pirates holding you against the bow ny your arms, their captain pressing the barrel of his pistol to your forehead as they bickered.

"There has to be something on board."

"We could just take her. Looks like she's probably a feisty little thing."

"Still have to check the cabins. Could be—"

Mihawk cleared his throat.

The trio turned their heads in almost comedic synchrony, their jaws dropping at the mere sight of him leaning against the door of the cabin. Mihawk's eyes flickered from them to you, and you averted your eyes, clearly ashamed to be seen in such a compromising situation.

So he shifted his gaze back to the opposing pirates, his eyes flickering between each of them.

"You will remove your hands from the girl or I will gladly remove them for you," he said levelly, lifting his eyebrows.

They quickly let go of your arms, and stepped away when he moved forward to wrap a hand around your wrist and pull you to him. He curled his arm around your waist, lowering his head over yours for a moment and murmuring quietly, "Are you hurt?"

You shook your head no quickly, your jaw set at a rigid angle as you turned your gaze down to your feet, your shoulders tense. He pressed a light kiss to your temple for a long moment before lifting his gaze back to the trio that had dared board your ship, his eyes narrowing in an unspoken threat.

"Go." They remained frozen, glancing between each other. "Now."

They scrambled back over to their ship immediately, severing the ropes that were tethering it to yours. Mihawk kept his arm around you, but his eyes remained trained onto the opposing sloop as it drifted away on the wind, debating on just drawing his sword and splitting it in half on the spot.

He turned his attention back down to you when you began to pull away from him. He pulled you in close again, frowning. It wasn't at all like you to be bested by a few no-names, and it was clear that you weren't taking it very well.

"Tell me what happened," he said finally.

"I woke up," you said curtly. "Thought I'd check the charts and see how far we were from Shells Town. They were already on the deck. Seemed to think this was a small merchant vessel since there's no flag. I'd left my knives in the cabin and I was still half asleep when I came out here. By the time I registered what was going on, one of them had a pistol to my head."

You really weren't making a very good case for him to not sink their boat. He cut his eyes briefly toward the sloop before looking back down at you, your face shadowed by your hair as you stared down at the deck floor.

"Their captain started questioning me about cargo," you continued. "Told them there wasn't anything valuable on board. They were discussing taking me as compensation." You sighed heavily. "And that's when you chose to enter stage left and take approximately twenty years off the end of their lives."

He rolled his eyes the slightest bit at your quip. "I would have taken a great deal more than that had they hurt you."

"Well, they didn't," you replied, your voice still curt. Mihawk lifted an eyebrow. "And it's perhaps best not to go splitting any boats in half a stone's throw away from a naval base," you added, nodding back toward the bow of the vessel.

Mihawk gave a quick glance as well. He had been too focused on the fiasco he had just awoken to to notice that Shells Town was visible on the horizon now. It wasn't as if the Marines could do much about it if he did sink the sloop, but you were right—it would still be more of a hassle than it was worth. He sighed, shaking his head a little, and curled a hand under your chin to lift your gaze to his. You still kept your eyes averted, your jaw set. He hadn't seen you lose a fight before—apart from sparring with him while training, but that hardly counted.

You had proven to be quite the fighter when he had decided to test you. You were nowhere near his equal, but you knew precisely how to play to your strengths with your pair of daggers and your throwing knives. Your stature made you difficult to target even in single combat, your movements a graceful dance that toed the line between evasion and power.

Yet one loss—and a rather inconsequential loss, at that—and you were beating yourself up over it quite a great deal more than what constituted normalcy. Mihawk wasn't sure whether to scold you for being dramatic or attempt to comfort you.

"You were caught off guard, little one," he said after a long moment, brushing a thumb across your cheek. "There's no need to be so upset over that."

"I'm not upset, I'm annoyed," you retorted, pursing your lips a little. "Blades or no, I should have been able to take care of those idiots."

"Annoyed, then," he allowed with a small sigh. "And I've no doubt you would have had I not woke. I was simply able to handle it a bit more...subtly."

"Oh, yes, because sauntering out onto the deck with a giant sword and threatening to cut off their hands was so subtle," you said, your voice dripping with sarcasm as you finally rolled your eyes over to his, lifting your eyebrows.

"Don't be a brat," he chided lightly. "We still have at least half an hour before we make port." Mihawk abruptly wrapped his hand around your chin and pressed his lips to yours in a brief, deep kiss that made you draw in a sharp breath. He parted just as you started to lean into it, resting his forehead against yours. He lowered his voice to an intimate murmur. "I would truly hate to have to spend it punishing you, my little bird."

You quirked an eyebrow, your lips curving in a small, coy smirk. "No you wouldn't."

He gave you a thoughtful frown and a small shrug of his shoulder. "Perhaps not." You let out a small cry of alarm when he stooped down and quickly scooped you up from the deck floor, one arm beneath your knees and his other curled around your back. "I suppose we'll just have to find out."

You chuckled lightly as he carried you to the door of the main cabin, plucking his hat off of his head and placing it on your own as you brushed your lips to his in a soft, teasing manner. Mihawk lifted his eyebrows when you nipped lightly at his bottom lip.

"You're really pushing your luck, my dear," he cautioned.

He lowered you down to the double bed in the cabin, his thumb rubbing small circles at the back of your neck. You lifted yourself onto your elbows, your lips nearly brushing his before he pulled back just far enough to stop you, lightly gripping your hair at the nape of your neck to keep you from sitting up any higher. You gave a small whine of protest, but didn't try to struggle against his grip—you and he both knew there was no point.

"Lie down." His voice remained low and intimate, but there was a subtle command in his tone, in the way his gaze burned into your own. You bit your bottom lip lightly, lowering yourself back down onto the bed fully. A soft, quivering sigh left your lips as he slowly began slipping the buttons down the front of your shirt loose. "Hands over your head. And you don't move them an inch until I tell you you can."

"Mmm..." You hummed thoughtfully, and Mihawk paused in unbuttoning your shirt as you lifted your arms from the bed, holding your hands high above you, straight up in the air. "I think my arms might end up getting tired."

Your lips pursed a little, clearly struggling to keep a straight face, and he lifted an eyebrow at you. "You're certainly in rare form today."

Mihawk wrapped his hand around both of your wrists, shoving your hands down into the plush white comforter over your head, and a couple giggles escaped you before you bit your lip again. It was honestly a bit endearing, how cheeky you were being—and all the moreso, as it appeared you were being so brazen just so he could have his fun with your punishment.

You were enticing him more and more every passing day, beyond the physical desire that had led him to claim you as his a couple months ago. It wasn't a feeling he was particularly accustomed to, nor was he quite sure what to make of it yet. He knew only that when he had seen you held captive against the bow of the boat, an emotion had flashed through him for a moment that he hadn't experienced in years.

For the briefest moment, Dracule Mihawk had felt fear.

He was not ready to contend with the connotations of that.

And he was a bit too busy at the moment, anyway. He let his forehead touch yours, his lips hovering a breath away from your own.

"You don't move your hands," he repeated, tilting his head to just barely graze his lips against your neck, drawing a small moan from your lips, "until I give you permission. Understood?"

"Yes, sir..." you sighed softly, your eyes slipping shut as he kissed down your collarbone, pushing your shirt open. His hand released your wrists and trailed down your arms, down to knead at the soft tissue of your breast through the sheer lace of your bra, feeling your nipple harden against his palm. He tugged the cups down, just a bit too hard given he felt one of them tear in his grasp, but that was a problem for later, not now.

You gasped out when he briefly pulled one of your stiff nipples into his mouth, his grip tightening slightly around your ribcage as you arched your chest toward his swirling tongue. His gaze flicked up to watch you writhe and shudder under his touch, your fingers digging into the bedsheets behind you, your hands searching for anything to keep occupied with.

"Very good," he praised, lifting a hand to brush a few strands of hair out of your eyes and brushing his lips to your jaw. "You see?" He wrapped his hand around your jaw and lightly pressed his lips to yours. "It's much better when you're a good little bird, isn't it?"

"This—doesn't feel much like a punishment," you commented, gasping softly as he circled the pad of his thumb around your nipple, lightly skimming across it once or twice.

"Yet," he corrected.

And gave you a small, devilish smirk, before lowering his head and biting down on the tender skin at the crook of your neck. Just hard enough to leave behind a small bruise, to draw a sharp cry from your lips and send a shiver through your body.

He straightened out as you heaved a sigh, standing over you. Your eyes remained glued to him while he shrugged away his long coat and tossed it back into a chair behind him, noting how your hands tightened down on the bedsheets again.

"Remember we still have a half an hour before we reach Shells Town." His fingertips curled around the waist of your shorts, the lace of your panties beneath them, and slowly inched them down your hips. "I could spend the entirety of it teasing you." Mihawk noted the movement in your throat as you swallowed in nervous anticipation, your eyes glued to his as he pulled them up the length of your legs and off, flinging them aside. "Making you beg for release but never allowing you the satisfaction."

How beautiful it was that it only took a few words to pull a blush to your cheeks and make your breath hitch. He brushed a light kiss to your calf and pushed your legs apart, rubbing his palms up your inner thighs.

"You're going to have to be on your best behavior if you want more, my sweet little bird." Trailing a single finger up your soft folds, dragging through your slick arousal and across your clit, pulling a small whimper from your lips. "Or would you rather I just torment you?"

You bit your lip, shaking your head quickly, your eyes flickering between his eyes and his fingertips trailing up. It was a struggle for him not to chuckle at you—always just cheeky enough to be amusing, but you knew the pleasure he could give you, were so desperate for it that you folded like a cheap deck of cards under his slightest touch.

Absolutely perfect.

Mihawk moved his hands up from your thighs, curling an arm under your back to lift you up and shift you further back on the bed. Your breathing was ragged with anticipation as he brushed his lips to your stomach, trailing his hands back down to your hips, his lips lower and lower, grazing slowly across the soft skin between your hip bones.

Shifting lower and dragging his tongue slowly up your slit, circling the sensitive bud at the apex, giving a quiet growl of approval as your breathy, shuddering moans filled the small cabin and your hips arched in his hands.

His gaze turned up toward your face, watching you draw closer to falling apart with every passing moment. This was only the beginning, and he still hadn't decided if he was going to give you what you wanted...but the sight of your divine, nearly naked and writhing under his touch with his hat still resting on your head made him just a little weak.

He moved from between your legs before he could get lost in the sight of you and the sweet sounds of your moans, reveling in the agonized whimper that left you as he trailed his mouth back up your stomach.

Across to your ribs, pausing at your breasts to brush his lips and his skilled tongue across your sensitive nipples.

Dragging his tongue up the column of your throat, seizing a fistful of your hair and crushing his lips to yours in a deep, possessive kiss, shoving your hip down onto the mattress to keep you from grinding against him, shifting his hand between your thighs to circle a finger around your tight entrance without pushing in. Your low moans and whines of protest were like music to his ears, your knuckles gone white from the force with which you gripped at the sheets over your head to keep your hands from wandering.

Every slow pass up and down your body brought you closer to the peak of pleasure but never quite there—and brought him closer and closer to caving in and giving it to you. He had to wonder whether you had any idea just how much of a temptation you were to him. It had been years since the pirate lord had allowed any woman to affect him quite as strongly as you had.

How much time had passed couldn't be ascertained for sure when he reached his breaking point—his mouth pressed into the crook of your neck while you moaned and begged desperately in his ear, one of his hands squeezing your breast hard enough to bruise the soft flesh while his other worked his belt buckle open and shoved his pants down his hips in a desperation that rivaled yours.

He shoved your open shirt up your shoulders and arms and flung it away; gripped one of your thighs, pushing your leg up as high as it would go, and the low growl that left his throat as he thrust into you was drowned out by your own cries of abandon. Your hips arched up from the bed to meet his, one of your arms flinging around his neck and your hooking beneath his arm to grip hard at his shoulder.

"I don't recall giving you permission to move," he breathed into your neck. He gritted his teeth as he pushed his hips forward hard, shoving yours back down into the bed as you cried out again, your slick walls tightening around his cock.

"I—I'm sorry, I can't—I can't—please—" You gasped, your head falling back as he moved in you in deep, hard thrusts, your fingernails dragging down his back. "Oh God, please—"

He lifted a hand to grasp at your hair as he crushed his lips to yours, delving his tongue into your mouth and drawing in a deep breath as you moaned desperately into the fierce kiss. The prospect of punishing you, of what the hell he had even been punishing you for was forgotten in this rush of unquenchable lust and desire, of pure carnal need for your body.

He normally hated losing control, but this was on another level entirely. There was no room to hate this, no room for anything but pure pleasure, for getting lost inside you as your walls tightened around his cock, as every muscle in his groin tensed and tightened in anticipation of impending release—

Your lips breaking away from his, your cry of abandon as your climax swept over you pulled him right over the edge with you. He pulled your hip up from the bed to slam into you as he came, gritting his teeth against a low groan, the rhythmic contractions of your tight channel milking him dry. His hips jerked toward yours with each intense wave of pleasure, fingers tangling in your hair as he pressed his lips to your neck, the two of you shuddering and tangled together over the bedsheets.

Mihawk heaved a shuddering sigh into the crook of your neck, his fingers tangled in your hair as he brushed his thumb across your temple. Maybe it was the lingering euphoria, but he didn't even think about the next words that left his mouth before he heard them himself.

"God dammit, (Y/N), I love you."

But it was impossible to deny any longer. You really were everything he had never realized he craved. No, it wasn't just the euphoria in the moment—it was that brief flash of fear earlier at the thought of you being hurt, at the thought of losing you. The utter fury at the morons who had briefly held you captive. How perfectly you balanced and complemented his desires.

He felt as much as heard you draw in a small gasp beneath him. "Y—you—wh—?"

"You heard me," Mihawk interrupted your quiet, almost cautious stammering, murmuring against your neck. He brushed his lips against one of the small, round bruises he had left on the soft skin, and said it again, quietly, "I love you."

You were quiet for a long moment, but he wasn't concerned, still trailing kisses up the side of your neck. He had seen it in your eyes before now, heard it in the softness of your voice when you lay against him, your fingers in his hair and your lips brushing his.

Several seconds passed, before you turned your head slowly and pressed your lips to his, tentatively at first, and then deepening the slow kiss with a soft sigh. He shifted onto his side, tugging you to him by your hip. Your forehead came to rest against his as your lips drifted apart, still barely a breath away, your eyes closed, your voice a quiet whisper.

"I...love you."

(Ch. 2)

[fourswordsannotated]

akira himekawa are unbelievably cool.

soooo here's the thing. i was looking at akira himekawa's website on a whim and found a public blog, with posts that go all the way back to 2009. many hours of google translating later, and i've developed an even stronger admiration of these two women and their exceptional career as manga artists. they share so much in these posts about the creative process, their thoughts on social justice, their connections with nature, and their most major original story, gliding reki, which seems to have always been a passion project in the midst of commercial work.

from what i could gather, reki is unique in that they were determined to do it in full color. and they did it, because after reading about their career, it's clear to me that when these women set their mind to an idea, they make it happen. see also: they just recently produced and distributed their own art book, because no publishers were offering to do it in a way that pleased them.

their stated goals for reki were to make something more adult than their previous children's manga, taking place in a city, involving a lot of mechanical art, and featuring stronger romantic and self-described erotic subtext. good for them. before i get into the four swords-related stuff, i'm sharing what i could find on the internet about reki.

more under the cut, because there's quite a bit to discuss :)

not much that i could find on the blog specifically references four swords, but they have many fascinating insights about nintendo, the zelda fandom, and the franchise as a whole. i can't know for certain because this information was surmised from translated text, but it seems as if their manga with chibi link made them feel a little stifled, which is why they took a long break before returning to do twilight princess. it's not lost on me that even a work like four swords, which they may regard as not their favorite or best, still has inspired and brought together so many passionate, creative, and diverse people. this is especially sweet because it seems as if they met each other, and formed their creative partnership, because of a shared fandom interest of their own.

honda and nagano have shared their thoughts and feelings on this blog for more than a decade, and they have a lot of thoughts and feelings. throughout their entire career they've made commentary on work-life balance, their experiences as women in a male-dominated field, and their desire to create original art while simultaneously enjoying some commercial work as well. they are passionate about social justice, particularly re: women and indigenous people, and offer insights on aspects of culture and history and the state of the world that really could resonate with anyone. and they really seem to appreciate fans of their work, and emphasize repeatedly the care and thought they put into their manga in the hopes it will inspire and bring catharsis to readers. they love animals (especially wolves), being outside in nature, being nerds about art they enjoy, a certain subgenre of romantic manga that appealed to and empowered female readers in the 90's and 2000's, and traveling around the world to partake in activities like horse riding and falconry.

the coolest part is, they're still updating the blog to this day :) in fact they seem to have recently returned to it, reflecting that twitter is not their preferred manner of sharing things online. they seem very familiar with and fond of older-school blogging culture.

there's a lot more i could say here about my findings, some of which do pertain to... certain ships 💜🖤 . but i don't want my genuine appreciation for these authors to be overshadowed by that kind of conversation. in addition to a link to the blog itself, i'm including a few translated posts of interests, which you can interpret and incorporate into your perception of the media however you please. at the end of the day, it's a really cool gift that these artists have chosen to share so much over such a long period of time. by making their personalities, beliefs, and insights more visible to fans of their work, i hope it brings new context to the stories we already love.

a modern-day insight:

re: the zelda mangas. these are from several points throughout their career. please note that they have so many fond things to say about zelda as a franchise and their work on the mangas, especially regarding the way they've affected fans. i encourage you to look for yourself, on their blog and their other socials!

re: gliding reki

re: the creative process (and in the latter two, the fandom that seems to have inspired them!)

re: their two goofyass adorable tiny dogs that they dress up in outfits while also loving wolves like a lot, they love wolves (both domesticated and wild), they really love wolves

re: wolf day (every day is wolf day,)

re: indigenous rights

re: painting serious works on commission vs their manga. i can't know for sure exactly what it means, but it really does kinda hit

re: a fan and manga artist in training bringing them art and a note

and a moment from a twilight princess manga interview i found very sweet :)

okay. you've made it to the end. i know you're wondering. here you go. please remember that this is and always has been a public blog, and these posts are actually from 2009 and 2010. also please remember that the point of this post is not to cause or fuel fandom discourse, but to appreciate these authors and the things that they choose to express.

(also, this is the column they were referring to in image 1. it's FASCINATING. give it a read if you'd like!)

the dots are there. you're welcome to connect them.

thank you for your beautiful work and insights, honda and nagano. please never change.

[thebottomfromhell]

I was doing the role reversal request and this popped into my head...how about some sex with the human Higher Moons being dominated by their demonic partners? Brutal and rough sex to the point where they pass out because their s/o just don't seem to understand that humans have a limit to endurance, multiple orgasms in a row and being treated like sex dolls that leave them drooling and crying while being fucked in the most diverse positions.

I know I delayed this one on purpose, I try to not send too many things requested, that's on me. I try to get the mosts requests I can the fastest as possible, and I write more than one at the same time most of the time, so I find it the most productive, even if that doesn't make sense since I will be getting everything out anyway but still.

I liked this promt, to see the Uppermoons as a broken mess while the demon partner is fucking still going on and on and on with unlimited endurance and stamina 😳😩😫. Overstimulating is a chef kiss kink, change my mind (you can't).

The other post should give a bit more of context of how I view the characters in Role Reversal AU. Here is the link, it's also on the masterlist. I hope you like this.

Role Reversal Uppermoons being railed to Oblivión by Male Demon Reader

Warnings: Sexual content, Dub-con/non-con (starts always as consented, but reader genuinely doesn't know when to stop), Implied past rape (nothing to do with reader), Implied prostutution, Implied underage sex, Marathon sex, Praise kink, Blood kink, Body worship, Overstimulation, Somnophilia (in some reader continues even after character passed out), Rough sex, S&M, Oral sex, Mentioned switching, Belly inflation and Pecattiphilia.

Gyutaro:

You are not his first. He comes from a prostitution district, how would you be his first? It's his first time with someone who actually cares, though. It was... not ideal, to say at least, so he never had no expectations in what you wanted. He figured it would be for the best to just let you take whatever you want. Specially since... he did want it, you... but all his previous experiences did not help to what he wanted to have with you. You, who cares about him and his sister and would not want to hurt him, so besides trusting himself to you, he didn't know what to do. Viewing it back, maybe he should have settled some boundaries first instead of waiting to the last minutes to stop something he was no longer able to.

"Neah-ne-NEH S-s- URGH!" He can barely speak anymore, the idea of saying something you could understand is definetely out of the window. Completely out of the window. Gyutaro can't breath, feeling every thrust into his gueverytime yo slide in, making it hard to properly inhale without choking in his own saliva, as he can't swallow. At first he could handle it, you were not worse to him than other... "lovers", you made sure he was feeling good from the start. He is still lost on the initial kises as you exposed his skin, skin that smelled deadly, toxic, like wysteria, to the point you didn't dare to bite, but it didn't stop you from carresing and kissing the black marks. "Shhh~ I'll take care of you." you said with yout hot breath against his pulse.

You made sure to lube him, to jerk him off as you prepared his hole for the bigger intrusion with your finger, slowly and gently, only to loose control the secon the tight heat clenched around you hard and pulsatin cock. You couldn't help yourself, you started slaming into him, having to constantly remind you that being too violent could break him... also forgetting that too much sex could too. Your mind is also in a frenzy, the salpping wet sounds at first were joined with groans and moans, each time sounding more like whines in your ear, uneven and deliciously broken with the contact of the hot, blushed and sweaty skin. And so you kept going again, and again, and again- "Y-URGH~! Y/~! PLE~ARGHSH! NE-NEAHH! CA-CN'T UGHN!" his face is red, just like his eye that, having one close and the other as open that it bulges, pupils dilatated lost on the upper eyelid, mouth open with trails of saliva falling off with tears.

You have him under you, bend over almost in half as you have one of his knees over your shoulder and the other besides your waist, spreading him in a way that lets you see the base of your erection appear and disappear in every thrust, and after several time cumming, both inside and outside him, there are stains of both of yours and his seed in your torsos, with Gyutaro's belly bulging slightly as you thrust. "So- urgh~ fucking cute..." He can't hear you, he can't see you, there is only an interrupted beeting, unclear colors, a stincky smell of male sex, dizzying bounces in a constant static of pleasure and soreness. He can't move besides spasming everytime his nerves regain sensibility. How long have you been like this? He already lost count of how many times he came, but now balls empty, cumming dry, it's even harder to tell. Hours? Days? Weeks? It feels like years, like if his body grew into an overheated, overfilled figure of heavy and strectched limbs. "Nn-hah-hahACK!... NN~AHHH~ MMNRGH!"

"That's it... ohhh, keep making those cute sounds." Part of him becomes scared that you will never stop, you could never stop, you have the endourance and stamina for that. You could just keep cumming inside him, part of him is already settling to the idea as he begins to sob. It's too much and you can barely notice him when his insides are sloppy and pulsating hard, heart beats fast and he can't return a last kiss that allows you to explore his flooded mouth, tonge avoiding yours, giving you the oportunity lo lick the flesh inside to the throat. Thankfully, you stopped. "Are you ok?" ... Gyutaro would not have answereded that even if he could, and he can't. Only managing to whine as you take you cock out.

He whimpers for almost an hour after and the first thing he says when he can speak again "I-I-I-Iahh.... fuckiiing hate-hate yahh, ne...." You got carried away, and Gyutaro is holding you accountable for it. You better prey Daki doesn't find out about any of this.

Gyokko:

Gyokko? A virgin? HAH! As if! Have you seen him? Of course he is not a virgin, he had sex with plenty of people, both men and women lined up for his attention... before getting to know him, but one night stands would never be missed. Even at those times he was not into... safety. He never cared for safewords or any boundary, he could stablish them for himself on the run and didn't need to depend on other's will for him to make sure things are how he likes them. Maybe he should have understood that, with uou being a demon, he would need to stablish some more safety measures. It was exciting for both, the fact that both of hou thought you could get away with anything, even if it meant hurting the other side. You are ok with the needles in your body, even if the wysteria hurts, it doesn't stop you. And it doesn't stop him. "Mnngh~ it's that all you got?" Gyokko asks cocky at first as you lick his body, tasting the salty taste with every little bite, marks annoying Gyokko but nothing enought to make you stop (he will need to find the way to hide them later). You only smirk back to him, taking it as a challenge, so you move to bite his leg, the iiner thigh, so hard that he bleeds, you take a bit of the liquid in your mouth only to drop it into his hole as you spread his ass, using it to lube the rim as you also use your tongue. "Ahh! Why, you want to top? I guess I can let you this time." You both take it fast as you finger him just enough to avoid pain as he grabs the back of your head, pulling and moving it to the point your neck is uncomfortable, laughing at any groan that shows it. Once you had enough you pull away and grab his wrists on his back to take him from behind.

You line your cock into his hole, groaning at the sensation, feeling the thrill as he fights your grip, moaning loud when he feels the tip pushing inside, and once that little, curved part is fully in after gentle and soft push, you suddenly slam the rest of it to the base. Gyokko screams while you growl into his nape, letting his hands hos as he uses them to get himself stable. "Fuck, you're so tight." Is the only thing you can say, the only thing in your mind as you start moving your hips back and forward as you inhale the Hashira's scent. It smells like sea, coins and blood, besides the ingredients he uses for his pots. "Urgh~ shit!shit!shit! Aren't- oooohh~ you a demon? Argh~ do it better..." But you can, andproves later as you keep thrusting into him. Gyokko enjoyed his first orgasm, even as you kept going through it, the seconds one left him having spasming and a bit sensitive, but nothing he couldn't like. It was after the third orgasm, efter you already came, when he realized the danger he was in.

"He-he-hey-urgn! Wa-wai-wait!" He turned part of his body around to push your face away from the back of your shoulder, basically stabbing one of your eyes with his thumb. You back off a bit, but don't pull out, giving Gyokko some seconds to take a breath as your eye heals. "What? You can't take it anymore? "Aren'r you a Hashira"?" You mock him. in the last part, making a pain pop out in the human's face as he turns around as he sits on your lap, gravity and position letting the tip of your cock find an untouched group of nerves that make the trembles and clenching react in the human's body. "Who do you think you are talking to?" He starts thrusting himself into you, bouncing up and down, letting you see the tired eyes fighting to stay open and every tremble in the sweaty and brusied (because of the bites and some hard grips) body. You grab his hips and move him yourself, slapping sounds coming out as Gyokko whimpers.

None of you have any idea how much time it passed as you started cumming again as you get fucking him, erection still feeling the tight and hot clench around it's lenght no matter how much you fuck the rim open. Gyokko doesn't even speak or scream anymore, barely bieng able to make a sound as he feels like your dick reaches too far into his body, it didn't feel like this before. He swears he feels as if your seed arrived to his nose, as the knots with the smell of sex don't let him breath properly, and the saliva in his mouth make the tongue feel heavy and restricted, making his breathing very aggresive as tears ruin his usual make up. "Fuck, argh~ you look so cute." Gyokko feels as if he is going to die, his body fully leaning into yours as he can't support his own weight. You can feel the cum slide through his the hole everytime you pull out, going down to your own ass, wetness making a messy sensation. It's somehow comfortable, having all that makes sex on top of you and being able to handdle it to your liking.

You feel satiated after a few hours, having loosing count of how many times you came, also the amount of times Gyokko came is not minor, you can feel the sticky white liquied in between both of your torsos as his head lies in your shoulder, where you can feel the hot drool and tears. "Was that good enough for you?" You tease, not recieving a response at all. "Gyokko?" Nothing, you move a little bit to see him with blank eyes, tears not even forming anymore but his face still ruined with black, purple and green stains.... This is your fault. The second he gets better he goes to the clean himself, trippling to the grown every few steps but threatening you every few steps away. Once he came back, hair and make-up done, he basically spits to you "You are NOT topping again!"

Hantengu:

Sometimes he wants to forget everything, to forget about his problems, his past, his job, or whatever else. He doesn't trust anyone to that, you are his best bet. Until now he has only had small relationships with women, some courting and some one night stands, but nothing with a man, even if he had some attention once or twice from his same gender. He didn't know what to expect when you started to strip him while kissing and nibbling, leaving marks in a tense and trembling body, already starting to sweat and react to the touch. He is simply too cute, you rub yourself into Hantengu, making him squeak a little. He is letting you take control, he doesn't know how to do it with a man, so he would rather just... lie back. "Eeck! Wha-wait! It's dirty there!" He says as you beging to smell under his balls into his crack, making you laugh a bit over his red face, shoulders and ears.

You don't seem to care about that as you keep using your tongue on that place, tasting the skin and teasing the rim before using the wet organ to stre the hole. You are slow with Hantengu, understanding that he is sensitive, a bit fragile, even, so he nees a bit of stability to be provided. "Y-Y-Y/N... please..." You make sure to finger him properly, to kiss and suck his skin, leaving small purple marks on it. You make sure to also carress his body, for him to be able to feel you near and feel safe. As you do that he already begins to form tears in his eyes with red cheeks and ears, you wonder how someone like this managed to become a Hashira, but he did manage. "Shhh, it's ok. I will take care of you, I'll make you cum so hard you will only be able feel your orgasms. Mnn? Would you like that?" He sobs a littles as he feels the words against his body as you keep his lips less than a breath away from him.

He covers his face with his wrists, not daring to see you as you keep touching his body, you can his heartbeat speed up as you keep adding fingers until e can take the third one. By that moment your erection is already stiff and gaining color, becoming uncomfortable because of the lack of attention. "I want to fuck you already, fuck... can I?" You basically growl into his ear, making Hantengu whince and tremble as he looks away before nodding slightly. You position him facing the side, one leg under you and the other over your knee as you spread the buttcheeks to see the twitching hole before pushing in slowly, feeling soften up and wet inner walls tight up around your lenght. Hantengu starts to whimper the second he feels the intrusion against his rim. "Ahh... mangh... ! Y-Y/N!" And once you put it in... there is no turning back.

You see Hantengu's face from this angle, already crying while he holds one of arms, you can feel the heat of the blushed skin, the scent of his flesh. You start as slow as you can, feeling the need to dig in, to take, to consume against a prey. You can control most of it, but still, a part of you feels numb, or at least overpowered by the sensations. "Y-Y-ARGH! PLE-PLEASHE! URGH! CAN-CAN'T!" He was already messy by the first time he came, the second was a nightmare, it left him oversensitive and you just didn't stop. Every thrust he could feel too hot, having to pant and whine, slowly the heat and the movement making him tired, unable to do more. Also, the sweat adds a sense of coldness that makes it's body try to get smaller in itself, contrasted to the heat, it's overwhealming. The tears make his vision blur and the environment makes it hard to breath, he swears he is going to faint. Don'tfaintdon'tfaintdon'-

There is still movement, it's the fisrt thing he identifies after a while, back and forward. It's still hot and cold at the same time, wetness being uncomfortable but the stimulation being addicting, unable for him to stop, and not like he could do anything about it. There is a feeling of fullness and by the time he slowly remembers what was going on he them just assumes you changed the position so you got deeper. He can feel his hole being a bit more loose, barely feeling your cock as he sobs and whimpers. He just woke up but he is still tired, his throat hurts and he doesn't have any tears left to shed, e definetely needs to drink some water but you won't stop. "....y-y-y/...." he can't, he cant speak, even as you speed up the thrust. You think this one is the real one, this one will satiate you.

Hantengu was so sensitive he came a little after you last orgasm, arching his whole back and neck as his tongue scapes his mouth, drooling over his jaw and neck. After that you lie besides him and start kissing him, cock still inside, warmed up by the filled with seed insides, sloppy ass letting most of it slip out even with your dick plugging it. You kiss Hantengu's ear, did you even notice he passed out? "Do you want to stay like this?" The human can only star falling asleep again after nodding slightly, he also doesn't want you to pull apart now that his body is finally relaxing. He will be fine, just... five more minutes... (after he sends you for some water, then he goes to sleep again)

Sekido:

Sekido doesn't like your hunger, your craving, it gets him anxious, and that irritates him. But there is also the feact that you really can't control it, as a part of him reasons that is better having you lusting over him than preying on others with gluttony. Specially if he feels those others could be one of his brothers. "Would you hurry up?!" Also, with his life style? He is afraid to die without having this with anyone, to die without having experienced the pleasure of having someone needing him, wanting him, and taking him. He trusts you enough for it to be you, you are the one he trusts the most besides his brothers and the Urami guy, but still. "I don't want to stay fooling around all night. If you are not going to fuck me then fuck off." He has never being patient.

He doesn't give two shits if it's dry or not, you offer to use your own blood as lube, but Sekido fears that if his inner flesh tears then your blood would transform him. Because you insisted in using something, you are using his blood, biting his shoulder and taking the red liquid mixed with your saliva. You insert your first finger with a bit of resistance, making Sekido growl, your ear in his nape when you do. You keep fingering him, inserting digits with one hand while spreading the cheeks with the other, being able to thee the rim twitch when you touch a sensitive part. He also smells delicious, his blood making you drool with appetite you try to satiate by liking his skin, making Sekido tense. "You taste so nice." You can see the blussh in his shoulder, ears and nape, being a good company to the trembles. "Just put it in."

You obey him, opening the passage with your fingers digging into his flesh, you procede to line your tipe into the hole, preassure making Sekido growl instinctly, sound turning into a groan for every inch you pushed inside slowly. There are bit of grunts in protests but he doesn't dare to tell you to go faster, as he is giving you the back, more comfotable in this position, he doesn't know if he can trust your stenght or that you won't snap and try to hurt him. He still has his staff at reach, thunder breathing, even without a weapon, should be enough to scape your grasp and take it into his hands. "Relax a little." He trembles as he feels you licking his spina before you star moving in and out, spreading his buttlocks again to be able to see your erection appear and disappear for every thrust you make inside the tight cavity, slap sounds for every move. "Urg- can't you go any faster?!" You can, and you do.

Sekido wants to forget everything for a while, he gets to do so, losing himself in your thrusts as you hit his inner walls, only focusing on the pulse both have and the movement the impact causes, he can only hear that sound as he bites his lips, besides sometimes paying attention to the groans and growls you release as you lick, bite and suck his back, probably leaving marks but not feeling any killing intent. It was good, it was a break, until he came. Then he became a bit more sensitive, trembles getting more violent and needing more effort to breath, but you didn't stop, and he would not have let you either. "Argh! Ahhgh! Shi-" He would not have let you take care of him that way, to just stay together while he calms down, he has no idea if you knew but didn't care, he has more stressed over the fact that he couldn't shut down groans and moans with his mouth fully open for him to be able to breath.

With the time the fast movements started to make him feel a little dizzy as the effort and heat blurred his vision with tears, he could feel knots forming in his nose and it was becoming hard to swallow the saliva accumulating in his mouth. "Fu- ARGH! SHI-SHI-SHT!" How much time have you been like this, he can feel his limbs becoming sore and the wetness being cold against his flesh and skin, you have already arogasmed. Why are you not satiated? It only takes some time for his arms to give in, making his face flat against the surface. Seeing this, you turn him around without pulling out, Sekido can tell that he is handdled, but can only stare and frown as to the colors of your figures while you keep moving in and out. You kiss his lips, he doesn't reciprocate the gesture, to tire as he just lets you fuck him. "Let me take care of you."

(He stabs you with the staff the second he gets better after it and leaves without saying a word, using the wapon to not fall.)

Karaku:

Karaku didn't know what to expect from having sex with a flesh eating demon, you are his first in that sense. Sex with men, already did, sex with older people too, both people more and less experienced, he had a bit of everything, at least he will with you on the list. Part of him is afraid he read wrong the signals, that you don't want to fuck him but to eat him, so he unconciously trembles against your soft touch. "Shhhh~ relax. Let me take care of you." You whisper against his nakes chest, licking one nipple and squeezing the other. "I will relax once it feels good, but I really need the info, so..." he says before kneeling and sucking your half hard cock into his throat, making you groan of pleasure as you start thrusting in and out of his mouth, no gag reflex stopping you from slam into the wet and soft cavity.

It's Karaku the one that decides the has enought of taking it up on his throat, taking your now salivated fully erected dick out of his mouth, sticking his tongue out while he does before smiling at you. "Let me take care of you first~." He knew what he was coming for, so he prepared himself already, just in case. Still, he needs to ask, but keeping s mall smirk he rubs your erection with one hand and positons it against his cheek. "So... you top or bottom?" He is ok with whate justs nevereds to make sure to leave the inn room before sunrise and satisfy you to the point of talking. He starts sucking the tip of your cock against his lips, using his tongue to tease. "Top." You answer as he starts pull off the pants of the uniform, keeping the jacked and shirt but opening all the buttons. Once he finishes he grabs your waits to force you to sit in the edge of the bed, climbing up your lap as he lines up with your sex. "So... we already know the location and number of victims. What can you add?"

He rubs teasingly his crotch and ass with your erectiong, smiling as he doesn't let you grab him, using his own pace to pent you up to the point of talking. "Names, ranks, abilities, preferences. I'm good with anything, handsome~. But I won't let you get this hard and tasty cock inside any other of my holes if you don't tell me something useful." And yo do tell him, everything there is to know, not caring if it could count as some sort of treason. The slayer smiles before suddenly grabbing your dick to line it up with his entrance. "Good boy~. I'll let you stablish the pace-ARGH!" He screams, mostly out of surprise as you move your scrotch up, making you both groan. Karaku grabs tightly your sholuders as the feels the intrusion hit his insides, face blushing and panting as the soften up, still lubed and clenching hole embraces you in, you keep moving, liking the sensation of flesh hitting each other with the wait noises. "Fu-fuck! You feel so good..."

He is not against rough treatment, he actually enjoys it quite a lot, so Karaku doesn't think much of it. He has good stamina, so he keeps up with it for a while, even when the tiredness and soreness of his legs as he also buences up and down make it noticeable that you last more than most humans, and the second he came... It's been years since he was the first one to have an orgams against his partner, when he was younger and didn't have a much experience. He arches his back as you keep thrusting in and our, moving his body, he guesses you should cum soon so he didn't say anything, just kept going with his limbs trembling, blusing hard and panting. He closes his eyes and decide to stop trying, just wrap his arms around your neck, he can't keep up with the intensity. Then you actually cum but... you are not stopping at all. It's still the same movements and same intensity but... hotter and wet, Karaku can feel his nerves reacting to different stimulations. "NGHAH!" His voice is higher than susual, he tries to cover it, only to feel a bit dizzy when he moves to do so. "AHH! MNGH!" he suddenly starts crying as he tries to stay stll, every thrust making it harder to breath.

His insides clench and pulsate against your cock, balancing itself between sloppy when you bounce in and tight when you bounce out, hot also affecting you, making you pant, letting you inhale the scent of his neck, feeling the pulse in it and the short breaths, you take a bite that makes Karaku whine in your ear. His body is hot against yours, you start to grope the muscles and flesh as some spasms appear. The curtains are close, but you can still feel that the sun is about to rise after several loads of cum filles both of your torsos and the slayer's insides. He can only shed tears from his eyes, sticking his tongue out as his mouth flooded with saliva, falling from the organ to your shoulders. You can basically feel that karaku is starting to have his orgasms dry as he arches his back violently, almost falling to the floor if you were not the one holding him, but nothing came out his dick. "ST-STA-ARGH! Y-Y/N!" You also cum one last time.

After that it takes some moments to Karaku to calm down, still sentistive and looking tired he stands up, his legs still trembling as he uses some priece of cloth to wipe your seed out of his ass, not red and spasmong, making Karaku tremble everytime he touches it. He sobs a little before talking with a dry throat. "I think I need you to remind me the intel before I go home...." Just. The. Intel.

Urogi:

Urogi never smells fresh, he always of like earth, plants and sweat, at least he always smells like that by the time you find each other. It's ok for you, you like that scent, it remids you to the wildness. Sometimes you think Urogi's smell should let you confuse him for a demon, the adrenaline and lack of human products should have that effect, if it was not because his own smell screams "tasty". It's a human scent, the one of prey, except this one is more powerful. "Such a good boy~ you are being so good right now. Let me reward you." He giggles under the positive attention as he feels your teeth in your neck, he really just needs to feel cherished. To do something that will bring him joy, a sense of freedom. "Please..." He asks softly, nicely, and you give in.

You make sure to carress his back softly, since it seems to be a sensitive spot for him, liking the touch, the sentation ofbeing hold, leaning towards your hands. You make sure that he is ready, but you will have to be gentle, considering you only used your salive as you fingered him, but it seemed Urogi prefered it this way. He also started to lick and nibble you as he wrapped his arms, cratching your back. He seems to be enjoying it, as animalistic as it turns. The same way you have to hold yourself back in order to not hurt him, he also seems to be constantly reminding himself of how dangerous can be that he takes a bite of your flesh and blood, what he will become. "I'll put it in now." You say as you hold each other, whispering against his skin. As you rub yourself into him before you line up, Urogi scratching your back the second he feels the tip of your cock intruding his hole. "Yes... ohh fuck yeah!"

"ARGH!" You find yourself surpirsed when he actually manages to tear some of your back with his nails, making the other giggle. You can't tell what of all of it was, but you both just kept feeling this should be more wild, more fierce. You start biting his shoulder as you stop concentrating, trusting your instincts, feeling a bit more free you get to enjoy the tight heat around your cock as you move in and out, stimulating the inner walls and your own erection in search for release. As Urogi starts being louder, you can only keep bouncing your hips in order to keep pleasuring yourself, serching an orgasm.

"AHHGH! FU-FU-URGH! AY! Y-Y-Y-AH!" Urogi can't speak at this point, just react at the stimulation his body is suffering, who knoes how long you both have been like this? He can feel your erection hitting sensitive spots, he can't help but arch his back while he cums. Saliva acumulates in his mouth, he feels that if he closes it he will bite his own tongue, tongue that somehow feels axphyxiated inside the cavity. He doesn't know when it started, but on onw point, after you also started cumming, it felt as if your seed did all the journey up to his throat an nose, adding to a sensation of having a hard time breathing. This might be also be because of his body temperature rising, making his skin red and his pulse sppeding up with your thrusts. He starts to become tired as his sight gets blurry, shapes turning into colors, and colors turning into black.

You are still fucking him when he wakes up, being the first noise he barely recognizes a whine from his drooling mouthm he feels his eyes sore and his cheeks wet, and he can feel knots in his nose. He can't grab into you anymore, his limbs are yet to react, he feels full. He swears that is he gets to look at his belly he will find a bulge, it feels as if you came at least 100 times (he can't even know if that is an exageration or not, but let him express himself as he wants to). You cum one more time and he swears he will start throwing up your seed, thankfully the pucking part doesn't happen as you finish to savour that sloppy wet hole, rocking your hips to make sure your escencd gets as deep as it can as some slips through the thrusts, making Urogi scream again and arch his back as he also gets a last orgasm from a sensitive and sore cock. (Oddly enough, Urogi only wants to cuddle and sleep again after that, but you don't question him.)

Aizetsu:

Aizetsu has always been lazy when it comes to relationships, even when relating to his own brothers. He likes to put the least effort possible, he is not energetic or extroverted enough to do it any other way. You seem to understand it, as you never seem disappointed with the fact that you are the one that has to reach out all the time. Right now you are fingering as he trembles, ears and shoulders blushing more than his face, as two lubes digits push agaibst his inner walls, streatching and spreading Aizetsu out. He whimpers and moans slightly, sometimes he even whibes a littles, voice already sounding broken. "Can.... mngh... you ad ano-no-nother finge-eergh.... plea-pleashe...." He looks at you with teary eyes and you swear he is perfect as you get hard.

But you've got to admit, it's hard keeping check of your strenght. You can tell the way Aizetsu wants to be treated is gentle and tender, some words tha hardly relate to demons, you are capable of it, but not used to. You use four fingers to stimulate and strectch his insides, but you can feel your own cock growing harder to the point it's painful, or at least uncomfortable, but Aizetsu takes his time enjoying your fingers press against his walls, not feeling preassured to speed or rough things up. You focus on his reactions, in his eyes tearing up with him wiping them off his face, making a sad expression at the same time he moves his hips against your hand everytime you push your finger a bit deeper, arching his back a littles everytime you brush a puddle of nerves. "Y/N! Ahhh! Y/N!" You didn't know what to expect when he ends cumming on your face, as you were closer to his entrance to see the hole clench around you.

You start wiping the cum and licking it from your hand, the salty and a bit acid taste is exciting, amking your red and hard cock twitch as you see Aizetsu holding his legs open while he looks at you, blushing. "Ple-pleashe more...." And you give him more, you take your fingers off, basically in a hurry and turn Aizetsu around to get a better view of his ass clenching on nothing as you spread his cheeks, the pink rim twinking at you. At this point you can't wait as you push your erection inside, feeling wet and hot walls of soft flesh let your cock in smoothly, without any effort, until you balls hit Aizetsu's, making him whimper. You start kissing his shoulder as he keeps whining and whimpering, then to start bouncing in and out. The walls tight up everytime you hit a sensitive part, making it feel as if the hole was sucking you in with how easy it was to slide in but how odd it felt to pull back.

Aizetsu's cries didn't make themselves wait, him trembling with hot blushed ears, face and upper back made it hard to hold back to bite the visible parts as they became sweaty. He is fine when he has alrady had three orgasms and you are in your second, but the second you turn him around again to get your dick back inside as seed is slipping out, he realizes you are not going to stop any time soon. Instead of fighting it, he decides to just let you, feeling the sorenes in his limbs, he just keep making sounds as tears stop falling from his eyes with a thirsty throat, only being able to whimper everytime you hit specific sensitive spots. "ARGH!.... ahh-AH! mmmmMNGH!" It takes a while, heat making it hard to breath and sweat making him tremble more violently, besides arching his back and spasming every orgasm, he only takes a breath the second you stop.

"That.... was good.... Can you.... get me water?" Is all he says once he can speak again, seems he liked it.

Akaza:

You are his first, no matter in what sense you explain it, you are the first person, if he wants to count you that way, that Akaza has slept with. Hakuji used to have a fiance, but he would never have dishonored her by touching her before their wedding, they both have wanted their first time to be special, but none of them got to the altar. He doesn't want to think about the past right now, about all of those "if only", but... Akaza also wants his first to be special, to be right. He himself doesn't know if he trusts you to make it happen that way or if he simply doesn't care anymore, but here you are. "Don't be scared. I'll be gently at first." You told him as Akaza trembles and shys away under your touch, under you.

It's nice, the sensation of being loved, cherished... wanted. It doesn't feel him completely, Akaza has always needed to be... needed, but you craving for him does a lot. "Mngh~" He moans when you bite, liking the sting as you suck his blood, you raise his knee to the side of you face and start kissing the inner thigh. You make sure to softly prepare him, salivating as you can smell him, the masculine flesh and juicy blood, young and strong. It wakes up every instict, making you tremble for anticipation. You use your tongue, tasting the salty liquids the heat produces in his legs and scrotch. "Y/N..." He basically sighs your name as you carefully "oil him up" using the natural fluids of both of your bodies. It will make it hurt a bit, but Akaza is all for it.

"Argh!" When you first slide in, it irritates a little, when you start moving, it sores, then in pleasures. Meanwhile, you can only feel the clenching hot inner walls tight up around your lenght. When you look back to him in detail you can see that Akaza looks up, mouth in a O shape with his pupils dilatated with red all over the face and neck, he trembles a little every time you brush besides his sweet spot, moaning softly and shyly as he calls your name. You speed up until he cums, you take a taste as he takes a breath. The taste is addicting, just as his blood, you can feel your cock twitch inside him as you move him. You take it put for a second, hole twinking and you erection pulsing as it rises up with a red tip, almost painful. There is a whine when you turn Akaza for his spotless back (in terms of bites, it's has tattoos like the front) as you grab him be the back of his knees, raising them over his shoulders. "I can't hold back anymore...."

He is basically bent in half as you lower hin for you to thrust back home, Akaza whimpers at the act and arches his neck back, curling the fingers in his feet. You wait a while as you start going again, biting the back of his neck and shoulders, sucking and inhaling everything of him you can. The scent, the heat, the taste, everything just makes you need him more, and more and more. You cum once... but you are not satisfied at all, you are still painfully hard, the now soft and wet flesh being a relief as Akaza drools with his head looking uo, leaning in you. There are sobs and moans mixed up when you start bouncing him up and down again. "Y-Y-Argh~ URGH~ OoOHH!" It feels good... too much. His body is trembling and he feels his limbs becoming sore. The nerves hit just right, and then thw tip od you cock starts to repeatively hit his prostrate. "AH! UHH~ ARGHAH~MNAGH!" He cums again, and again, and again... you also keep cuming, it gets to the point Akaza is so full he can't tell when you are cumming or not. He starts panting loud, very loud as he tries to breath, overwhealmed by the temperature and preassure in his guts, it's too much.

Tears falls from his eyes as he can't cobtrol the sounds of his mouth anymore, being louder than the wet slap of your crotch with his ass, and the drips of trails of cum falling down as you rise his body up, sliding through the base of your erection and balls until they hit the floor or continue the jojrney theough your leg. "You are so pretty, I still can't believe I'm the first. Many would envy me." You growl, but Akaza can only hear his own heartbeat and breathing, everything else is unclear, so no matter how many praises you whisper into his marked ear, he can't answer. And you just keep going, he is so tired while you just need more, you are almost there, almost satisfied, just once more, you tell yourrself everytime. You just need hin to keep taking another load and you will let him go, just another one. The bounces already felt par of Akaza, to the point he geta dizzy and disoriented when they stop as you came one last time, he is barely in his senses, unable to move besides the trembles and spasms in his nerves. Once your cock is out, your seed starts to make a trail conecting your bodies as Akaza clenches hard, unused to the emptiness, not letting it all fall from once. "Darling?"

Akaza growls and groans weakly, suddenly feeling cold, too cold, and tense. He trembles as his body is sore and can't find himself moving, even when you lie him over you. He can't even close his eyes. "Hey! What's wrong?" You ask as he passes out... you definetely did something, because the moment he wakes up he can't even sit. "Fuck you, don't touch me!" He says when you try to help. Maybe you should bave controled yourself a little more.

Douma:

Douma is sure he never loved anyone the same way he loved her, the only one which he could count for attention that didn't hurt or feel off, as if there was a sense of danger to everyone he was supposed to meet. Douma was raised to serve and being observed, her eyes were the brightest, pure, completely opposite to yours. "You are so pretty, almost like a doll." What a fitting description, with only a small blush in the cheeks and ears, mostly due to the cold of outside mixed with the faster circulation, his pale skin, and empty bur colorful eyes, he could easily pretend to be a doll if he doesn't move, talk and uses a Total Concentration technique to atoo his heart and lungs from working. This is so familiar he can't help but lean into you. "Do you like it?" He does, his heart is beating so fast it's impossible to not like it.

It's the same way he love killing demons, but letting into your hands (the oneas of a demon for an irony), it's a lot more simple, he can give himself a moment to be lazy but at the same time feeling something. "I do, so I want more. You will be giving it to me, won't you?" You are nothing but something familiar, you are the eyes from his childhood, the simplicity of her and the doom of his life. He would let you do almost anything to his body, including killing him if it were not for the fact he simple doesn't want to die. He can't tell if he is supposed to, his instinct are the ones that force his body into making the effort of surviving, so he just goes along with it. But he likes risky things, harmful things, new things. He likes whatever can make his body react, this included. Because of that he makes sure you ruse preparing him.

"Darling, I'm waiting~. I want to feel you inside, I'm watching you down there, I am sure you want to feel me too." He can tell from your clear erection, while Douma has little experience with nudity besides his own, it would not have been appropriate, he knows male anatomy and biology, at least the basic. Come to think about it, as you slide in a bit roughly, a bit uncormfortable because of the rushed prepararion, when Douma has to wince because of those sensations, he realizes nothing of this is appropriate. He should not be offering himself to a demon, he should be all up and mighty, like a deity, killing you and answering his followers' pleads. What would they, his followers, masters and parents think if they could see him? What horrors would they experiment upon watching their only link to god bieng dominated by a demon?Corrupted and turned into a sin... the thought makes his pulse speed up and his dick twitch.

This is why he doesn't ask or tell you to stop, even when he recognizes he logically should, since you will not be stopping yourself. He has to wonder what are you feeling with those lost eyes, focused in specific things, too specific, like his face or other parts of his body to the point you don't seem able to read anything else. Then the overstimulation, after more than hours of cumming and recieving your cock and seed make him wonder. Does your vision also blurs from the sensatiosn? Do you also have a hard time swallow and breathing? Do the constant bouncing make you feel tipsy? Do the heat of the contact and cold from the sweat make you tremble and feel heavier? Are your limbs also becoming sore? It gets to the point he can't move anymore withput having to gasp for air and arch his back with everything going on at the same time. And you are not stopping. "HAH! AHH-hah! MNGH!" And he doesn't want you to stop until you are satiated, because someone stopping for his sake is unfamiliar, and he doesn't want to deal with whatever that means to him right now.

He is tight, clenching hard against your cock. You can only focus on how pretty the blushed skin looks against the silver hair and rainbow eyes. Also, you can't begin to describe that smell of power, of coldness, that runs into Douma's blood. You can't stop, you are addicted to it, and you are not satiated yet, even as you have to move him as if Douma was actually a doll, you don't stop stimulating your dick with the inner walls. Until you can't give nor take more, only then you stop, the moment you take your cock out having your seed slide out. "Did you like it?" You ask, in which, after a pause, without even thinking about it, just wanting to catch some breath, Douma nods. "Le-let's.. do it.... again some time~." Nobody is taking this from him, not again.

Kokushibou:

While Kokushibou does have some... memories... but in this life he has never... he is not... he never thought.... he is still a virgin, ok? You know that, it was as clear as the full moon, and so you promised to be careful, and to lead because he didn't want to do it. He is somehow weird, too prideful and yet scared of his own pride, fearing someone might get hurt because of his actions but also not knowing how else to behave without exposing vulnerability. Right now he considers he is being vulnerable with you, somehow trusting that it won't hurt him. Kokushibou lies on his back, not making eye contact, only grabbing your arms for a sense of stability. "Can... can we take it slower?" He trembles, somehow looking a bit intimidated, so you suck hear earlobe gently as you carress his face.

You take it as gently and slowly as you can, keeping the instict to take a bite, to sratch, to savour that flesh in a sense of... victory? You don't completely understand from where that sensation could come from. From the chase to get him to open up? From the power that would mean to hold over the strongest Hashira? You have no idea, and honestly, maybe it's better that way, to just focus in what you have in front. You think Kokushibou is adorable, lovely and beautiful, but you know he has a hard time seeing even those terms related to himself. Also, reading him is not as easy as you think it should be, you most of the time can get what he needs, but there are parts that are confusing. Right now you don't even know if he actually wants intimidacy or just to forget about something, if he wants the experience or the pleasure.

He enjoys the silence as you keep kissing his body, making sure he can relax, enjoy himself, even if he look nervious or scared (again, the sense of victory), you make sure to suck him up a little and use proper lube to stretch him up, use your fingers inside the cavity, feeling the body going from tensing to relaxing and backforward. "Don't think it too much." You whisper in his ear as you make your final movements with your digits against the now wet walls, making sure they will not tear. Still, you lube your cock a bit after taking the three digits out softly, now hard, the cold of the wetness making you almost spasm a little before you line up the tip to the entrance.

"Fuck! You are so tight!" You exclaim as Kokushibou blushes harder and covers his face with one one over his mouth and noise, eyes open big as he refuses to make any embarrasing noise at all. At that you took it as a challenge to make him moan, groan, growl, or whatever, but for him to make a sound. He didn't make anything until he came, it was a small grunt, but you were not satisfied with that, and also you didn't reach your own orgasm, so you kept going. "C'mon love urgh~, beauty, make some noise for me." You are both stubborn, even after you came once he didn't make any noise, with tears forming in his eyes and knots in his nose, he even bit back the sobs. It was becoming too much. It was not until his fourth orgasm, in which was uncomfortable and painful because of hoe sensitive his dick was, that Kokushibou whimpered.

"MAGH! mnngh...." That sound was addictive, you needed to hear more as your cock twitched inside Kokushibou, making you speed up the thrusts. Some minutes later, he could only whimper more as his limbs felt heavy and his back and ass felt sore, wet sounds and movements making him feel dizzy, and the saliva that accumulated in his mouth started drooling. Kokushibous could not feel more embarrased by this outcome, but he had to recognize he was to stubborn to stop it in time. his vision becomes blurred over time and he feels tired, he arches his back in spasms every once in a while but besides that he only has blank eyes as his body, too overwhealmed, tries to ignore the constant stimulation. By the time you finish with him, he is as good as unconcious. "mngh....."

(Are you really surprised he started to evade you again? He spent 2 months after this running away from you, not even looking at your way, only blushing inmediately at your sight. What sense of victory, this is now a feeling of loss.)

[ottiliere]

i have to say, it has been a really long time since i have gotten as excited about a story as i have about the grief complex. seeing more of lynn and cam and the dynamic between the two of them made it impossible for me to read the new chapter at work without grinning like an idiot the whole time. ever since i first read part one, they have lived in my brain-- a testament to how well they're both portrayed, so much meaning in each drawing and sentence-- so much economy of characterization!!!! i'm in love with the way you draw facial expressions. so much emotion and subtlety..! i really liked cam's little conversation with the gas station attendant and seeing his more playful, childish side. i'm very interested to see what else will be revealed regarding the cause of the slow deterioration of the people around our two Noble Heroes. i also think the weird gross little animals are very cute and i hope to see more of them. also, while i don't want to be crass, especially about a story that's so-- i guess, delicately written, with such a light and skillful hand in regards to character dynamics, so please forgive me if this is over the line, but i really think that if cam kicked lynn in the stomach and put cigarettes out on him, ect. until he started age regressing or crying or something like that it would be a net positive for their relationship and would lead to healthier communication between the two of them; this is the only reason i want this to happen, of course. i'm already looking forward to the next chapter! thank you both for making beautiful art.

i'm glad people are enjoying the story, hearing this is always especially pleasant. i do not consider myself a "hater" in any capacity but i am chronically dissatisfied with a lot of the contemporary work i run into in my personal circles...my interests are a bit narrow to begin with, too, so it's kind of an issue. we want to make something good.

i think dane has done a reasonably okay job with the story so far and given the amount of compliments we have received on characterization/dialogue/etc., i'm considering reducing his beatings. he'd thank you for that, i'm sure.

cam's behavior in that scene was maybe meant to be a little meaner than playful, though. how often do you talk to people who act like the attendant was acting? there's something sad about it to me, i can never bring myself to make fun of someone to their face the way cam does.

i don't see anything weird or gross about my cute little animals, but thanks! you can expect to see a lot more of them in later chapters. the ones on display in this chapter were sculpted by dane, herbert, and baja, and painted by dane. we have a growing and very diverse catalogue of their little bodies.

while i respect the desire to remain uncrass, bear in mind that sometimes it's best not to tip your hand. i'm not even sure what crassness you're referring to here - plenty of people seem to want to see lynn hurt, for some reason. violence is rarely the answer...i don't think beating or getting beat on would inspire much desire for healthy communication between these two at all! but I'm sure cam would like it, for a little while. glad you're having fun, thanks for letting me know. we plan to keep at it.

[imagionationstation]

Hi IS!! I seriously hope you're actually taking a break from Tumblr and social media instead of reading this haha, but I've been a follower for a few months now and couldn't help but send in a little post after seeing your rant. As someone who grew up with 2012 and adores it, and also as someone who respects Rise for what it is, I understand. 2012 is a huge comfort show to me and I've definitely gotten upset when all people do is go out of their way to tell you how horrible the show is without reason. 2012 is by no means perfect!! I am extremely aware of its flaws, but I don't believe that gives anyone permission to go out of their way just to ruin it for you. To target the one criticism that drives me a bit nuts, the "real brothers" thing. Rise has a very valid interpretation of brothers! But as someone with 3 other siblings, it is not sunshine and rainbows all the time. My older siblings would make me cry, we would fight and get hurt and hurt each other all of the time, my younger sibling would tattle on me, etc etc. But we also look out for each other, and have grown out of many of those things since then. I see a lot of my own sibling situations in 2012. Sure, it doesn't get everything right (and can be purposefully exaggerated because it is a cartoon!!), but it isn't wrong either. Everyone has different family experiences, and believing that Rise is the only correct interpretation of siblings would just be a bit narrow minded. I have many, many more points I could make in regards to the sibling ordeal (and other criticisms you mentioned!) but I'll leave it here for now. Overall, just enjoy what you want to enjoy! This goes for everyone. Someone is always going to want to rain on your parade, don't give them the power to do it. It's so much easier and less tiring to spend your time enjoying something you love over dunking on something you hate. :)

Thank you <3

As I mention over here, not really in a place to drop it yet, but I may sometime in the future. Your support is greatly appreciated!

As someone who grew up with 2012 and adores it, and also as someone who respects Rise for what it is, I understand. 2012 is a huge comfort show to me and I've definitely gotten upset when all people do is go out of their way to tell you how horrible the show is without reason.

Exactly! I have nothing against rottmnt. RISE is a great addition to the TMNT fandom. It has its highs and lows like anything else. It didn't deserve the dislike that many fans gave it in the beginning.

So why does 2012 deserve the exact same treatment after its time is over? Why doesn't it deserve the same respect for its diversity?

They experimented with some awesome and iffy things.

Some things worked and others didn't. Why can't we leave it at that?

I try and read the opinions that say "I like this, this, and this, but-" and ignore anything that is pure hate or comes from an account that has never said a single nice thing about the show.

But even then, it's often always the same old list of complaints.

And, like, Donnie is downright awful with his comebacks but sometimes I find myself doing the daily quote thing to the screen when I come across someone who is being supremely unreasonable.

(Not that I'd ever actually say that to anyone. It's my stress vice.

But. I definitely think it. Very hard.)

To target the one criticism that drives me a bit nuts, the "real brothers" thing.

EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS FOLLOWING PARAGRAPH BRINGS ME AN UNNAMABLE JOY.

You hit the nail right on the head!!

My family dynamic is so similar to these boys. One of my siblings very seriously told me a few days ago that I am not at all attractive, but a few weeks ago, the same sibling also reassured me that I deserved a love interest so much better than any person the world has handed me. Freakin' Raph impersonator over here.

Literally, I have siblings who interact like Leo and Raph. Constantly trying to be the superior in the relationship and hating when the other bosses them around. But you'd almost never find them apart because they are the other's shoulder to lean on.

I'm not anyone innocent either. I've said lots of things that I didn't mean in the past and I still slip up from time to time. I'm the type of person to be annoyed with a sibling and smack/shove them. My siblings do the exact same! Teasing and mocking and crude words aren't anything crazy. It's just how our fam do family.

I have a sibling who is just as insane and annoying as Mikey, but it's so frustrating because he's either purposefully stirring chaos and then laughing when we get upset, or so innocent and confused when I'm getting mad at him for doing something similar a while later.

We get so tired of it. But it's not his fault. He's untreated ADHD and lives his life to the fullest. What you gonna do? Stifle that? Please.

We get so tired of each other.

But we're always the first to have each others' backs.

Overall, just enjoy what you want to enjoy! This goes for everyone. Someone is always going to want to rain on your parade, don't give them the power to do it. It's so much easier and less tiring to spend your time enjoying something you love over dunking on something you hate. :)

Thank you so much. I always try to remind myself of that, but some days it can be hard. I really appreciate your kind words! I hope anyone reading this is also making note of them.

I don't ever want to be a hater.

Going giddly over the boys being themselves is so much more fun.

[alatismeni-theitsa]

I have some questions abt hellenic polytheism and how its practiced. I myself have been practicing it for a while, but something I noticed while researching about it is a distinct lack of actual greek people in online social media spaces. It was first brought to my attention after seeing a reddit post and youtube video explaining how using “hellenismos” is considered cultural appropriation. After that, Ive noticed how the main sources Ive used about hellenic polytheism isnt really from the people whos culture were trying to practice. AKA non greeks.

I would like to know your explanations on the basics of hellenic polytheism like altars/shrines, khernips, prayers, devotees, tarot/oracle cards, pendulums, kharis, and offerings. There might be some knowledge that I got wrong and need to change, like maybe the way I give offerings needs fixing and I need to give more perishable offerings like food than handmade crafts like art for apollo. And maybe theres a spicic way to do it and not just place it on the altar. Other than websites like hellenicfaith.com, r/hellenism is usually my main source with a grain of salt because of the strange lack of greeks in discussions, and although my friend who is also practicing hellenic polytheism gives me a lot of advice, their main sources are tiktok and. Well, I dont think I need to explain why thats a bad source. (Their main justification is “of course tiktok isnt that serious” and “it comes from the pagans themselves”)

Also, Im also curious on your thoughts about people who practice in secret.

I hope this isnt too long, I just wanna make sure Im using a better source than reddit because, well, its reddit. Not the most reliable source.

Hello! If you don't mind I will also address two more questions I got on the matter, since I feel they are related to yours. They are the following:

Hello all! You did very well to seek Greek sources because you are essentially dealing with a foreign culture and it's not right to assume it looks just like your local one. I will guide you as much as I can but I am very open to being corrected by knowledgeable Greeks and xenoi alike because I am not an infallible scholar. As always, my posts are open to additions in case I missed something.

Let me start by saying I believe it's important to focus on the living Greeks as well, in parallel to your studies of ancient religious texts. Not only were our ancient people diverse with various opinions but... they are also dead and cannot speak anymore. So, it's the alive Greeks who now handle and pass down the culture. If something gives the ick to modern Greeks, it probably goes against what the culture considers appropriate or strange.

Greeks will get "the ick" even if they are not well-read on ancient Greek customs, because the Greek culture largely holds its philosophy when it comes to worship. Disclaimer: This is not an unbroken rule, as some of our cultural elements have shifted or changed, as it happens to all cultures around the globe, and also because a Greek does not know everything. But it's good to keep that general statement in mind.

An example of a practice not seen favorably by Greeks nowadays is some Western women practitioners covering their heads because of Hellenic Polytheism. The ancient faith may demand it but the veil was forced a lot on Greek women and collectively we believe it doesn't make any sense to wear it, even in scenarios of faith tied to our culture. Now, that doesn't mean that it's any of our business if a Hellenic Polytheist wants to veil but it'd be good for this person to have knowledge of the history and rights of Greek women, and really evaluate why they want to veil beyond "the ancients did it", since Greek culture is largely disagreeable to that practice now. Find a larger discussion on veiling here.

Also please capitalize the first letter of Apollo's name because this shows proper respect ;)

Let's dive into specifics a little bit. Our culture was and is practical and anthropocentric. It takes into account reality and environment, as well as human nature.

For the anthropocentric aspect: Yes, there are general guidelines because we are talking about a tradition here but no one will take your head if you do it a bit differently. As for the practical aspect: if you give non-perishable items to the gods by putting them on their altar, in 10 years you won't have a space in your house to stand. If they are non-perishable you have no reason to remove them. Because if you remove them is like taking back offerings that were meant for the deity.

The offerings of Greeks in Polytheism and Christianity included perishable items such as food, candles/oil lamps, flowers, incense, libations, etc. And since they go bad you have a reason to remove them. But you also don't want any waste on the streets or in your house. Even the sacrificed animals were meant to be eaten, and the Greek communities believed that the smell of roasted meat made the gods rejoice. In some cases, offerings that were left outside were meant to be consumed by the homeless and travelers. Everything has a purpose and a reason within that specific community. (Flowers not so much, they are just ornamental)

It's not that you cannot or should not offer non-perishable items to the gods. I'm sure a few don't hurt anyone. Just keep in mind that if the offering is a non-perishable item it is/was usually offered to the temple, so the priests can sustain themselves and continue doing their religious service on behalf of the community. We are talking about coins, clothing, jugs, animals, or whatever else.

Continuing on the matter of offerings. A small rant on how clueless some people seem to be about offerings. It would be weird to knit a winter scarf for a god and then wear it yourself because that's not how dedication/devotion works in the Greek context. Also, leaving that winter scarf on the altar doesn't make sense either because it's just… impractical in the Greek sense. You are wasting a scarf, to put it plainly. But if you make something for one deity then give it to the deity, don't wear it yourself.

I'll tackle a few more specifics now. I think you already know what they mean so I will give my opinion on them rather than explaining them. I think my opinion is shared by many Greeks.

hellenismos -> I am not sure if it's appropriation but it's surely inaccurate. Here is why, for those who wonder, with some suggestions on how to call yourself. (hint: Hellenic Polytheist is fine)

on how to be respectful and accurate: I always recommend reading as many ancient Greek texts as possible the view of the gods directly from the ancient worshipers themselves. You can read whatever texts interest you, including plays. Plays are my favourite source, to be honest. Understand on your own what the text says. The Hymn to Demeter is focused on the pain of a mother, which is pretty obvious, you are under no obligation to hear Kate the TikToker who insists on something different. You don't have to hear YouTubers who tell you Zeus is an asshole when ancient texts show us the opposite, and give a good context on why he does what he does.

altars/shrines -> The altars I've seen are usually fine, so I think western polytheists have this down. The ancient ones would be more homogenous but in our era the religion is unorganized so it's up to the individual to create an altar. Greeks still have altars in their homes as a continuation of our polytheist practices and they also have some variation. Generally, all good here.

khernips -> χέρνιψ literally translates to "washer of hands". It's a Greek practice to have clean hands before touching any sacred objects, either in Dodekatheism or in Christianity. We do not always follow it but it's important. Our old custom is also to wash hands, face, and feet before entering our Christian temples (that's why there are κρήνες outside many of them) but that's not practiced anymore because our hygiene is overall better and we already visit the temple while clean.

The cleansing part will feel natural for most Greeks and not unfit for the whole procedure. You can also cleanse items with water if the purification ritual says so. Don't lose sleep over it. Remember practicality. Khernips is just water with which you wash your hands and you can do it before a meal, like we do today. It is meant to keep you clean but doesn't bear any spiritual force - it's not like the holy water of Christians which is imbued with divine power. It's just water included in a practice that helps the religious person get ready for spiritual time.

Also! Khernips doesn't mean that you wash the whole body! It's second part, νήβω / nivo = rub is connected to cleaning body parts. For the cleanliness of the whole body we used/use "λούω / λούζω". Fun fact, on of the greatest christian temples Hagia Sofia, had a reminder outside the gate with the same verb, and it was an anagram. "ΝΙΨΟΝ ΑΝΟΜΗΜΑΤΑ ΜΗ ΜΟΝΑΝ ΟΨΙΝ", meaning "wash your sins, too, not just your face". This anagram is found in other Christian sites, as well.

prayers -> Any prayer is good. There are only a few ways a prayer can go "wrong", since there's not a subscription for that. For example a prayer has to usually praise the magnanimity of the deity, even if you are just doing it to ask something, but words from the heart are also fine. Zeus won't smite you if you include him in a phrase without praising him first.

devotees -> Afaik this was a rare phenomenon in antiquity and it's only nowadays that Westerners decided that everyone is a devotee, which looks weird to Greeks because being a devotee doesn't work exactly like Westerners do it. You don't get to pick one god, talk 99% of the time about that god, or worship just them and not recognize the whole pantheon, or just give little attention to them.

Ancient Greek towns and people had gods they were closer to, for sure, but from what I know they didn't have the same concept as modern foreign worshipers today. They were not "αφιερωμένοι"/devoted, unless they devoted their life to a deity by serving in their temple. The devoted/devotees were not everyday people.

The everyday people felt closer to some gods in the way someone can have a saint or a prophet that they align themselves with, that they feel like they can see themselves on them, or that these gods see them, or that they are related to their struggles, or have given them some sort of protection. A cultivator of vineyards will probably feel closer to Dionysus, while a fisherman to Poseidon, and a warrior to Ares. It's the same for Christian Greeks, since each of the saints has one domain and we call on them depending on our needs.

I mean, it's okay if modern people want to make new things, but we should also be clear on the nature of the ancient practice.

tarot/oracle cards, pendulums -> They are unrelated to the practice. They are just recent elements of western spiritual fascination, and the ancient Greek religion is already complete without them. If Apollo chooses to reveal himself through tarot he may as well reveal himself on a toaster xD A toaster is as related to the ancient Greek religion as much as tarot cards.

kharis -> Some Westerners overhype foreign words that are, in reality, very simple terms. Kharis is just "the grace of god" and the concept is similar to the grace spoken in Christianity, Islam and Hinduism. Kharis is not lost if you forget to wash your hands once, or if you are afraid that the item you placed on the altar is not good enough. You don't have to tiptoe around it, it's not something incomprehensible and mystical.

miasma -> Nobody asked for it but I am delivering it anyways because I see many new people to the religion treat miasma like they are 5th-century Greeks who will be punished by the plague if they menstruate too close to the altar. I've seen endless discussions online about what miasma is and all the detailed ways that you can avoid it, and how to cleanse everything and... as a 21st-century practitioner you are not supposed to be that fearful. In the Πλυντήρια festival, the statue of Athena goddess was washed clean but also cleansed metaphorically by people's sins. And you can cleanse your statues as well of course but not with the mindset of considering yourself unclean. Do not follow every advice from ancient people who thought women unclean when menstruating. Ironically, this post and this post from r/hellenism have a good approach to this. As one user says:

people who practice in secret -> I don't have particular thoughts for them. If they must hide their spirituality for reasons beyond their control, it's natural for them to do so. I wish them the best in their spiritual journey.

Take a look at my F.A.Q. page, and more specifically on these questions:

Can I worship the Greek gods as a xenos (non-Greek)?

What do Greeks think of people outside of Greece worshiping the Greek gods?

Reading List / Book recommendations on Greek Mythology

Are the Greek gods assholes? // What’s up with gods coupling with mortal women?

Also, when it comes to the practices of the ancient Greek religion, Google Scholar is your friend. Read a variety of scholars and please include Greek ones on your reading list. Western academia focuses a lot on what the myth means to The West today, while Greek academia focuses on what the myths meant in their time. Some classical students report that studying classics in Greece VS in the US can be night and day, and they got a more authentic feeling from the knowledge they gained from the Greek classes.

For gods, festivals, and rituals in Greece, I have some recommendations below, if you’d like to take a look! (The links open directly to them so you can read them for free)

Let it rain’, or ‘rain, conceive’: Rituals of magical rain-making in Ancient Greece, a comparative approach. In Roca, Z. et al. (eds.): European Landscapes and Lifestyles: The Mediterranean and Beyond. Lisboa: Edições Universitárias Lusófonas 2007: 285-304.

Cosmos 17 (2001), 197-251 Rituals of Magical Rain-Making in Modern and Ancient Greece: A Comparative Approach by Evy Johanne Håland

http://en.arch.uoa.gr/fileadmin/arch.uoa.gr/uploads/images/evy_johanne_haland/cosmos_17-2_haland.pdf

p.s., I call Christian temples "temples" because that's how we call them. We use ναός very frequently for our religious buildings.

I hope I covered your questions so far 💙😊 See you around, and have a great day!

✨🌺✨🌺✨🌺✨🌺✨🌺✨🌺✨🌺✨🌺✨🌺✨🌺✨🌺

If my posts have helped you in any way, consider buying me a coffee or giving a Paypal donation. I spend many hours per day on questions and posts, so that would support me a little.

[falena-kingscholar]

Welcome to Sunset Savanna!

The king is a very busy man with lots to attend to, so I'll be taking care of all the administrative stuff so you all can have your fun!

My name is V, you can call me the royal advisor if you really wanted, and I'm here to keep everything running smoothly, keep this blog a safe place, and make sure everyone is having fun. In order to do that, of course, there have to be rules, so let me make this short and sweet as I can for you!

Bigots, terfs, racists, p*dos, you're all on the DNI list. I will block you if you come on my blog with the intention to harm someone else, or openly admit these values.

Being an advisor means I've got plenty on my plate beyond this blog. There is a real person running all this, with my own life to live. Please be patient and understanding.

Have fun!! If I or someone else is making you uncomfortable, feel free to let me know so I can set things right.

Limit your NSFW. I don't mind if you're thirsty to a certain extent, and I'm fine with cursing. Keep in mind that the RP community on Tumblr is diverse both in gender + sexuality, but also in age and I would like to keep this page friendly to everyone.

OCs, MCs and other Canon characters are welcome to interact. Just as a bit of a heads up, I'm not super comfortable shipping Falena with anyone besides his wife - but if you read below you'll see why that's a little rocky too.

This is a HEADCANON version of Falena. Below is a short description of how I interpret him and a few of his relationships. This is to ensure I enjoy the character I'm playing. This does not mean I'm not open to feedback or constructive criticism, just be respectful please.

Get To Know The King

He's fairly jovial and upbeat most of the time

He's really bad about just listening to problems - he likes to solve them

He and his wife are in a bit of weird spot - it's because he's still a closeted gay and it's impacted their marriage. He loves her still, just more platonically than romantically. They agreed to have a kid in hopes of repairing the rift they were both feeling, and it kind of worked, but he still really needs to be honest about his feelings Soon

Cheka is the one person he loves more than ANYONE and often comes across as a bit of an overbearing dad he's totally not just adding on to loving Cheka with all the love he wishes his brother would accept

The age gap between him and Leona? GUESS WHAT, I, THE PERSON BEHIND THE SCREEN HAVE THAT SAME AGE GAP WITH MY SISTERS (twins) (however we are still close and besties so I know. the Opposite of what I did is what I need to do for Falena sldkjfhlskdjf /hj)

That being said, Falena has a strained relationship with Leona that he has only recently come to notice now that Leona isn't around as often. He really wants to make amends, but feels like a complete stranger to his own brother and it shows in his interactions - he still kind of treats Leona like he's 6-13 because that's the Leona he remembers - the one who was still excited to see him when he came home from RSA. It wasn't until Falena was 19 that he noticed a bit of a rift. They started getting closer, then when Falena was 21 he was coronated and got married to his betrothed as his father fell ill.

Thank you for reading all of that! All that's left is to give credit where it's due.

The beautiful portrait done of his Royal Highness used as the face of this page, (with permission), was done by none other than @/lemonwerewolf here.

Dividers were made by @/saradika-graphics, here.

If the way I write seems familiar to you, you might recognize me from @twistedwonderlandshenanigans , my HC's and general writing blog for twst. (I follow from @/symphonicmetal101 though)

Thank you again, the King and I hope you enjoy your stay here,

In Sunset Savanna

[yjhariani]

I just want to share a little bit of my thought and I hope that my wording is not harming anyone in any way because that is not my intention. I am speaking as a Muslim-Indonesian, but that doesn't mean I represent all Muslim-Indonesian. I am speaking about what I am seeing and experiencing in Indonesia. I am one person amongst millions.

Someone asked me if I speak up for Palestine simply because I was an Arabic major and it pissed me off a little because what happens in Palestine right now should have been public knowledge by now and if you're not caught up, I'm just going to assume you live under a rock or you don't have Muslim friends (which is impossible if you're living in Indonesia).

Indonesians always have a very special bond with Palestinians. Even on a national level, Indonesia as a country always have a very special bond with Palestine.

Every time we learn about our declaration of independence in 1945, the first thing taught about the follow-up of it is that Palestine is the first country to acknowledge and admit Indonesian independence. Not only that, Indonesian citizen being majority Muslim is also another factor why we have that bond.

Our government is always supporting Palestine and Palestinians. Even they go as far as sacrificing our country not being the home of a very big international football event because we don't want Israelis who participate in that event stepping into our land. Mind you, that is a very big sacrifice seeing that a lot of Indonesians are football fans and the football scene in Indonesia has been rough the last few years, even a lot of people showed their disappointment of that decision.

Indonesia is probably one of the countries where it's safe to support Palestine and not safe for you to do otherwise. We don't ever do protest regarding anything that happens in Palestine. We do marches and call it Aksi Bela Palestina (Support Rally for Palestine). We don't call it a protest because the government has been and always be supporting Palestine, which is exactly what we want.

The only time I have to worry when I speak up about Palestine is when I go to social media for example here because I know that most of the people reading this post (if any) probably won't be Muslims, Indonesians, or Muslim-Indonesians.

However, despite all that, we still have a lot of things we should do better at as mentioned in this post (I added a little bit of what I had in mind regarding this issue). A lot of Indonesians still could not differentiate between Jews and Zionist government. A lot of Indonesians still generalised Israel as a whole as Jewish and that led to antisemitism discussed in said post.

Just recently, I saw videos of Indonesian promoting the boycott of "Jewish products" which is very, very wrong because they're not Jewish products, they're products whose developers support the Israeli government. A lot of Indonesian see the support towards Jewish people as supporting the Israeli government.

A lot of Indonesians, despite all of our identities are around unity in diversity, still aren't as united in diversity as it seems. There is a lack of Non-Muslim Indonesian support regarding Palestine because in the past, we always say that this is a religious war. That's why usually only Muslim Indonesians are showing their support for Palestine. Even then, some don't speak up because they thought it was too political.

As a Muslim Indonesian who grew up with an extended family of Non-Muslim Chinese-Indonesian, I witness not only the hesitation from one end to support Palestine or Middle Eastern in general and the hesitation from the other end to support Non-Muslim Indonesian, especially Chinese-Indonesian for very different reasons. It always breaks my heart to witness both and being in the middle of it.

I sense that Non-Muslim Indonesians hardly ever speak up about Palestine because they thought they aren't allowed to or can't say anything about it because it's a Muslim thing. Which is bullshit, by the way, because it's a humanitarian crisis and they shouldn't hesitate to speak up about it or even feel worried that someone is going to call them out if they speak up.

It's gonna sound silly, but Muslim supremacy is a thing here. At least I call it that because that's what it feels like to me.

However, lately I started seeing little by little the support of Non-Muslim Indonesians on Palestine. Even though they mostly only post watermelon emojis on Instagram, but at least that means they start learning about Palestine and started asking question. We recently finally use the name Jesus Christ in our national calendar instead of the Islamic equivalence that is Isa Al Masih and I don't see the harsh resistance from Muslim Indonesians that usually happened if the government is supporting other religions that are not Islam.

I hope these changes don't stop there.

Today, Indonesians are marching in support of Palestine. If you're around and are able to, come. If you still see it as a radical, extremist movement, ask questions or read some books. This rally is not the same as 212.

This is not for any religion. This is for Palestine. This is for humanity.

Free Palestine 🇵🇸🇵🇸🇵🇸

[actuallyevilgay]

The Apathy (Part 7)

Ascended Astarion x Male Tav

DNI if you are a minor. Dead dove don’t eat. Please read my about before replying. Content: Ascended Astarion x Male tav, this is post epilogue.

Summary: Astarion continues to carefully observe Tav while being a little jealous of Morlock.. Amongst others. Content Warnings: I don't think this one has any notable TWs? If I need to add new tags by the way, please let me know! A/N: heiii it's been a bit. I was GOING AND GOING with this one. Hope you enjoy the banter.

Read on ao3

Nauseous. Ever since the Dharma incident, you can’t help but feel incredibly nauseous. Something’s been nagging at the edge of your skull, as if there’s a physically missing piece. No, really, like there was a hole in your skull itself, rather than a lack of memory.

Perhaps you had a traumatic brain injury before you got yourself to Neverwinter, still not sure why you were here, or why there was this driving desire to hide away.

Jilvy’s tavern definitely fulfilled a portion of that desire, tucked away in a neat corner across a rather busy street, it garnered only a niche attention for most of the time. Jilvy’s efforts weren’t wasted though, and it showed in the diversity of new clientele popping up over time. The busy hours meant Jilvy would spend more time helping in the kitchen and less chatting up the customers. Not that she was complaining about it, she had you walk around as her personal handyman.. With the height difference and all.

Your work routine was so in sync that Jilvy no longer had to ask for things out of reach, you’d just hand them over without much thought.

To your own surprise, it was starting to get easier to just exist among people and be seen by them or looked at. Still, the nervous mannerisms remained. To the common folk, they found it endearing. You slowly came to realise Jilvy may have hired you because people were naturally drawn to you. Interested in mystery perhaps, or.. Your stuttering and overall attitude was entertaining in some way. The charisma was there, even when you’re not trying.

‘’He’s a real looker, isn’t he?’’ The average tavern gossip kept you on your toes, but as time went on it bothered you less.

The presence of the Tiefling adventurer had eased some of the stress, still the colour orange itself would put you on high alert.

Gale hadn’t shown up in a while. You figured he was too busy investigating the mage’s whereabouts. Perhaps he got into trouble, or maybe he had gone back to Waterdeep to handle business. He promised he’d come back after.

On Jilvy’s request, you started to write notes for yourself in a journal to share with Gale later, for your questions.. Ones he surely had answers to. There was a particular memory that would pop up over time, a city on fire.. A flying ship. Some aberrant creature speaking to you as if you were familiar. He was upset, insulted. Someone you had betrayed. Then there was a vision of corpses of creatures similar to him.. 

‘’You look beautiful when you’re lost in that pretty head of yours, boy.’’ The voice of a stoic man interrupted your trail of thoughts. ‘’That, or a mindflayer gobbled on your head-’’

‘’Mind flayer..? Sorry?’’ You blinked, the words pierced your skull. Examining the man before you, you assume he’s an adventurer, a barbarian type. Intimidating, and.. Really bad at flirting.

‘’Ha! Bad joke. I just arrived back home after touring Baldur’s gate, there was a whole thing over there. The Absolute Crisis. But you Neverwinter city folks don’t know anything about that, do you?’’

He cocks his head to the side, winking. You still can’t tell if he’s trying to flirt or insult you.

‘’But I like the dolly-looking guys. They let me talk.’’ No.. Now he’s talking to himself, about you.

Behind him, Morlock stands on his feet, withdrawing from a book he was reading, making eye contact with you.

You think back to the Barbarian’s mumbling for a bit and decide to write down some of the keywords he was talking about before turning your attention to him.

‘’Sir, this is a tavern- Well.. More of a teahouse. People always come here to chat, its an average day.’’ You blow him off, but he doesn’t take the hint.

‘’I was hoping to do more than chat.’’

‘’Okay, I think you’ve misread the sign that says no drunks.’’ Morlock taps the Barbarian’s shoulder. ‘’Leave the bartender be, For someone all talk, you seem to struggle with language a lot.’’ You’d hoped he’d do the mature thing and walk off, but he stands up tall to try and intimidate Morlock, who barely reacts to the attempt.

‘’Hmm. Almost adorable, you do look like a squealer.’’ Morlock mutters to himself.

The man then proceeds to reach forward and try to Grab Morlock’s horn, but he either slips or misses his aim, as Morlock steps sideways and grabs his arm, pulling him forward. He quickly loses balance and falls on a knee, trying to pull himself free. Morlock just squeezes him, digging his nails into the barbarian’s arm, who starts whining. ‘’Bastard!’’

‘’Last warning. Get. Out. If you get violent, I will not hold back.’’ He eyes the clientele. ‘’And I don’t think the good folk here appreciate violence.’’ 

The barbarian eyes you for a moment, almost to see if the conflict interests you. He’s likely looking for an excuse to try and impress you, only to stop at the lack of care in your expression.. You already went back to drying off glasses, listening in on the conversation.

As you turn your head back,There’s a faint glimmer in Morlock’s eyes. The barbarian walks out without another word, and the Tiefling drops a pouch of coins on the counter. 

‘’Did you pickpocket him?’’ You gasp, quietly hiding your admiration for the deed.

‘’A tip for the damages, it’s only fair.’’ Morlock shrugs. He retains eye contact while licking the barbarian’s blood off of his fingertips, noticing you’re starting to drown in his gaze. You shake your head, dizzy. Unsure.

Morlock puts a finger to his lips, grins, and shoves the pouch further in your direction.

‘’If you catch my meaning, darling.’’ He then walks back to his table and continues reading without a care in the world.

You blink, grabbing the pouch and pocketting it. A feeling of playful mischief makes you quietly smirk.. All too familiar. You maybe were a big game thief of sorts before coming here.. It was what you did to keep yourself fed before you started working for Jilvy..  If the weather allowed it, you could go back to the docks and find your hidden stash of stolen goods..

Even if you weren’t exactly aiming to be a criminal, some gut feeling told you it was necessary to have a plan B in case things went awry and living here wasn’t suitable anymore.

Another scribble for the journal.. A question to Gale. Why do you feel drawn to stealing? Would the wizard even have an answer to that? An instinctive need to take things you could take? A kleptomaniac? No.. Nothing in Jilvy’s tavern and living space had called upon that desire to put things in your pocket. So you assume it wasn’t an impulse.

You hadn’t called upon the telekinetic powers you used to grab things for a while, hoping it would lessen the headaches. Out of mild curiosity or just to make sure you still had them, you briefly make the cup you were working on float while no one is looking. ‘’Hmm..’’ Yep. Still got them.

And then it shatters on the ground before you realise you dropped it..

‘’Fuck.’’ Another thing to clean up.. Time to find the broom.

Morlock continues to watch from the corner of your eyes, subtly. You’ve noticed him stare, but figured he was just worried about you. He had been here daily since Jilvy reopened after the Dharma accident. A new book club member nonetheless. One stranger you felt you could trust.

There’s just.. Something about him that puts your guard down.

—

It’s not been too long, just a few days since Astarion started being a subtle bouncer pretending to be a customer, pretending to be a Tiefling called Morlock just so he could be near Tav without upsetting him.

He’d thought about it for quite some time, but simply couldn’t picture Tav wanting to look at the real him, let alone speak to him. Their last real conversation haunts him. Figures.. After his lashing out they sparingly spoke, only focussing on dealing with the netherbrain. Tav was quieter than he had been throughout the entire journey. That quietness remains even now. He only speaks when spoken to, avoiding conflict.

Tav couldn’t even retain eye contact during that last week of prepping for the netherbrain, Astarion recalls the taste of the lingering saltiness that coated his tongue back then. 

At the time, Astarion convinced himself he deserved better; His enlarged ego made him forget the world around him. The struggles of mortals. And Tav, was very much mortal. Warm, but distant. Emotionally he closed himself off entirely, focussing on getting the job done.

Offering the eternal gift would’ve sweetened the deal, right? He had cattle knocking on his doors begging for it when he got busy spreading his influence.

But it’s never been that simple with Tav.. Tav wasn’t as outspoken as he was, just blunt. He never demanded anything outside of the battlefield. He didn’t bark orders without reason, he wouldn’t force anyone to do something they didn’t like unless they were his enemy. Then.. You’d see a different side of him entirely.

Astarion’s glamored eyes linger on the page of his book, but the words escape from his mind’s eye. He visualised the memories he repressed, searching for answers on where things went awry, and why Tav pushed him away. All he could think of was the tadpoles, starting with Nere’s, and then.. In the shadowlands, he only regressed more after Moonrise..

Even now, the scent of illithid and netherese influence lingers on Tav. Astarion can smell it from here.

  There was a pause in that inner conflict back then when Astarion confessed. Tav defended him from this… Vile drow. Someone he’d rather forget about. The blood merchant.

Astarion’s confession led to their relationship evolving into something more, but before it could develop further, Astarion snapped the bridge they were building in half.

Or, he let it wither when it hadn’t sprouted fully. A waste.

No.. There’s one simple answer. Astarion had made everything about him. The confession, then his scars.. Killing the orthorn, Raphael, the ascension.. That night. Everything was about what he wanted and what he needed. Tav went along with it throughout most of the journey, but did he ever stop to ask what Tav wanted?

He just assumed. He plotted and planned.. Even now, he schemes.

But still, stubbornly so, he feels that he needs to plot and plan ahead. He cannot fail. He cannot let him slip from his grasp again, he just needs to.. Create the right opportunity to apologise. A scheme where he can get the two of them alone. To open his heart to him.

Otherwise.. He just pictures his dearest Tav staring at him blankly and walking off into smoke and dust again. Hiding from him.

Was he truly here to hide from him? Like Jaheira so confidently claimed? Out of all places, Astarion would have never put Neverwinter atop the list.. But, maybe he didn’t know Tav as well as he’d thought.

He mourns the time lost, as Morlock he could make up for it.. Learn a little. Tav deserved better from him.

Was he going about this the wrong way..? Certainly. But he wouldn’t willingly admit that.

As smoothly as this was going.. Astarion did notice the occasional glances from Tav, if he wasn’t glamoured, this would excite him. All he could really think of was that Morlock had game while he didn’t. If Morlock and he were separate people, and not an Elf wearing a disguise to spy on his ex.. He would strangle Morlock then and there for getting this much attention.

The fantasy itself was starting to become a habit. Every Time they exchanged brief eye contact, Tav looked so trusting at the tiefling.

When was the last time Tav looked at Astarion this way..? He can’t recall.

As much as he’d love to ponder more, time was passing and during the later hours of such a cold weekday, one customer is eager to get a warm drink in their body.

A beautiful human man, dark hair and bright blue eyes, walks in. Astarion notices Tav perk up immediately, recognising this person.. What’s this? Familiarity? Is he.. Seeing someone?

To not arouse suspicion, Astarion pulls the book closer to his face and pretends to be bewildered by the writing in utter suspense. What a performance..

He was youthful looking, but physically older than Tav. As for his manners.. There was a brief awkward staredown between the two as he sat down in a seat in front of the counter. ‘’Remember me?’’

‘’Oh- Mint guy.’’ Tav stutters.

‘’..Mint guy? Shit- I didn’t tell you my name.’’ He awkwardly scratches the back of his neck.

Good. Tav wasn’t seeing anyone..

‘’..I’m Tav.’’ Tav initiates small talk now? ‘’Just Tav.’’ A forced smile grows on his lips. He twitches nervously.

Fuck. The human is indeed very attractive..

‘’Well, ‘’Just’’ Tav. I’m Bouke. But you can call me Bo, if that’s easier.’’ He winks at him..

Tav lets out a soft chuckle. ‘’I like your name, it’s.. Unusual.’’

‘’Is it? You think I’m the rare sort? Well.. I’d love to try the rare chrysanthemum tea, with extra sugar please.’’ He points at a named menu item with his finger, then plants the same finger on his chin. He got the body language and lines for basic flirting down unlike the barbarian from earlier.. And Tav isn’t telling him no. 

Tav! Have some standards!

‘’Of course, it’ll take only a moment.’’ A bit of pink coats his cheeks.

Why isn’t he telling him no?! Gods.

He’d rather ‘’Morlock’’ get action than this… ‘’Average’’ good-looking person.

There’s a shift in the atmosphere of the teahouse tavern as Tav serves the man his drink and continues cleaning off dishes, checking on baked goods.. The other patrons have started to huddle together, whispering. The gossip was obviously about the cute bartender and the very good-looking patron getting actual attention from him.

‘’Calm down Astarion.. If you tense up more, it’ll be obvious you want to kill this guy on the spot..’’ He thinks to himself, untensing and turning a page of his book.

As he’s about to eye Tav and Bouke again, another patron approaches his table and points at the book. ‘’Oh, you’re reading this week’s book too?’’ Small talk.. Great. Now he has to multitask chatter too.

‘’Hmm? Yes. I’ve joined a bit late, I’m trying to catch up before the club meeting, if you don’t mind...’’ He replies, hoping that was enough of a sign that he wasn’t up for chatter. Instead.. The patron sits down at the other seat of his table and begins to talk about how happy he is to see a new face.. Something about wanting tieflings to feel more included in public spaces. But Astarion struggled to listen to their blabbering.

Bouke appears to be making conversation with Tav, as uninterested as he is in what the human has to say, Tav seems engaged, nodding and asking more.

He’s jotting down something in a notebook.. Is that an agenda? What is happening??

‘’And that’s why- If you’ve got any tiefling friends or family, don’t be afraid to invite them, this is a welcoming space.’’ The patron continues.

‘’Sorry- What?’’ By this point he can’t focus on holding the book in front of his face anymore.

‘’Oh- I spoke too fast, let me rephrase that..’’

 ‘’I appreciate the gesture, but as I said I was trying to read-’’

‘’..And there’s also this.. Y’know, it’s just not fair? Do tell me if anyone insults you for-’’

‘’Gods. Genuinely, Thank you for your concern, but I am trying to read.’’ 

‘’-My bad, So what do you like about the book? I think the plot takes a while to catch on..’’

He gives up.. At this point it's not his responsibility for this peasant to take a hint, they continue talking not even waiting for an answer.. Enough, back to whatever Bouke is doing-

‘’Hey uhm, Tav. I was wondering- I’ve been thinking about you since I first visited. Have- Uh.. Do you..? Are you.. Interested in me? I mean, to go on a date with me?’’ Bouke DARES. Oh, he is going to die for that if he-

‘’Oh. I-’’ Tav’s little smile starts turning into a frown, he clutches the notebook to his chest as he looks aside. ‘’I don’t know if I should.’’ Good boy. Tell him to fuck off already!

‘’..Why? ..Got your heart broken? You’re so sweet! I promise I won’t push you.’’ Bouke, Bouke, Bouke, Bo? Little Bo. You are digging yourself a grave right now. Don’t.

There’s not a brief silence, it's longer than some, Tav stops responding entirely, thinking.. Processing an answer. He seemed eager earlier, so this rejection has a reason. Astarion swallows, he hears a pin drop somewhere. The entire tavern is in suspense.

‘’I.. Am broken in places, where I shouldn’t be. I can’t. I’m sorry.’’ Throb. Damn, that stung Astarion more than he’d like it to. Deserved. He drops his book, reaching over to pick it up.

Even the annoying patron in front of him has stopped talking.

The entire tavern is quiet. There’s some coughs and awkward huffs. Bouke finishes his drink, not having a comeback to answer with. He seemed confident enough to try another pick-up line at first, but even he knows he can’t fill whatever void Tav appears to be dealing with. He pays and leaves with a simple gesture and a nod.

Tav is extremely dreary, Jilvy hadn’t interfered at first, keeping a watchful eye while she focussed on other chores. ‘’Tav, dear. If you need a break-’’

He withholds a sob. ‘’I’m fine. I want to finish this batch.’’ Then interrupts her, standing his ground. Jilvy sighs. She can boss him around, but it probably won’t help him much here. Then, Jilvy notices Astarion’s staring and just shrugs. He just shrugs back.

The tavern’s energy shifts again as some new folks drop inside for a late evening drink, and everyone forgets about the unfortunate rejection from earlier. Even Astarion’s undead, yet living lungs, release a sigh of relief that the tension has faded. It was so uncomfortable.

Slowly, the numbers of present patrons decrease. Once more, it’s quiet.

Tav walks away from his usual spot to clean up some of the tavern floor, as he paces near Astarion, he finally speaks up. ‘’Darling, I would love for a refill of this one.’’ He points to his cup with an extended finger, tapping it with his nail. A gentle cling sound echoes.

While he refills the cup, his hands tremble, so he stops before he can spill. ‘’..Sorry, I’m a little tired.’’ He managed to get the last bit of boiled water in the cup after taking a breath.

‘’It’s alright.’’

‘’You probably want to ask what that was all about.. There’s this, uh.. Gut feeling.’’

‘’Well, I certainly love prying and sharing gossip, but I don’t think you want me to ask.. Unless?’’ 

‘’Hmmh.’’

‘’Really, dear. You don’t have to share. I am curious to know what's on your mind, though.’’ Astarion, as Morlock, speaks in a gentle tone, his eyes softened.

Tav looks back at the active workload, determining if now is a good time to take a break.. Jilvy looks up and gives him a reassuring smile. Tav sighs with some relief and sits down in the chair in front of ‘’Morlock.’’

‘’I’ve been hurt really badly.’’ Tav opens up. ‘’I can’t say how, where, or why.’’ Vague wording, certainly secretive. Perhaps he’s hiding from everyone after all. Or is he simply wording it that way to keep it private?

‘’..And.. I’m empty.’’ He raises a hand, before clutching it towards his chest, atop his heart. ‘’I don’t know why I’m still here sometimes.. I’m sorry if that’s- Dark, I.. Sorry. You’re just so easy to talk to. I feel like I know you.. But I don’t, right?’’

‘’Don’t apologise. It’s alright.’’ Astarion hesitates, not sure if he should interrupt his venting. What’s there to say? To ask? Think.. You’re better at conversation than this.

‘’It sounds like Bouke did hit a nail on the head, heartbreak, I take it? Don’t hold back, Complain, insult, or vent as much as you’d like.’’

‘’Insult..?’’ Tav stammers. ‘’I’ve nothing bad to say about anyone.’’ He pauses. ‘’Well, perhaps that stoic guy from earlier today.. He.. Yeah.’’ He grins for a bit, lightening up. ‘’You’re really light fingered. I would love to see you do that again without Jilvy noticing.’’ He whispers. 

Astarion smirks, showing some teeth in his wicked smile. ‘’Maybe I just might, if another bad-tempered fool comes along.’’ He winks. ‘’But, then I won’t have enough time for this.. Novel.’’ He eyes the book again. It did have some interesting premise, but the plot.. Dragged on. There was too much thinking and too little happening in the start of it. How frustrating.

‘’Bit of a headache, to be honest.’’

‘’Ah.. I’ve been having nothing but headache since I’ve come to Neverwinter.’’ Oh, Tav is dropping details now? ..No, calm down. Don’t push. Be casual.

‘’I’ve come here mostly looking for work, and ways to pass time. The book club isn’t really my thing, I admit. But you ought to try new things sometimes.. I have too much time on my hands, and yet so little fits in a single day.’’ Astarion pauses, ‘’I’m running from one thing to the next. It’s.. Eh, chaotic. But necessary. What’s life without chaos? Plain. Tasteless.’’

‘’Tasteless..’’ Tav whispers, repeating him. ‘’In my.. Experience, chaos makes it hard to focus on taste. There’s too much of it, and you lose track of the little things.’’ He fidgets with his hands. ‘’..Do you ever stop running?’’

Astarion thinks, realising Tav is being indirect with his phrasing. They’re not talking about particulars. They’re expressing feelings. Tav is seeking words for whatever he’s feeling. Relating, but not saying how or why.

‘’I’m not sure if I’ve ever stopped running. There’s always someplace to run to, or from.’’ He responds. Truthfully, that’s how he felt himself.. Vampire ascendant, vampire lord. No longer a slave, but he’s running away from his ongoing plans and running to Tav, scheming.

Tav looks lost in thought, his eyes on the ceiling. He’s distracted by a spider weaving a web somewhere.. Then..

‘’It’s.. So much, and so little at once.’’ He whispers. ‘’But this tavern.. It brings me some peace.’’ He closes his eyes and releases a sigh. ‘’Don’t let me keep you.’’ Stands, and goes back to finishing up his cleaning work. He looks relieved and peaceful, which sets Astarion at ease. Too much stimulation for one day..

The queue for closing hour is there.. Astarion wraps up drinking his tea and leaves for the night, heading back to the building he was renting.

He may have gentle caress for Tav, patience, and obsessive love.. But anyone else is in the way. He is but a man of desire, but he was also a vampire.

And vampires are all about fulfilling desires.

At the first sight of his spawn, who eagerly await an update on the romance drama.. He stands firm while Morlock’s visage disappears and his white curls shine in the fresh moonlight. Next, he grins.

‘’Tyselius, Vandelion. There’s someone I need you to get rid off. Just a little side-character, nothing big. Make him disappear, an accident. Snack on the cattle too, if you wish. Just don’t leave a stain to be found.’’

Precious and annoying little pretty Bouke was never seen again.

—

Tara never took a liking to inns before, but she is relishing in this one.. It seems someone was suddenly opposed to going back home to Waterdeep. The tressym loved the idea of vacation, but travel..? Sometimes, yes. Now.. There’s Neverwinter.. And snow everywhere-

Tara would’ve preferred it warm. Yet, these silks and the fireplace.. It's enough. She can sleep, read, eat, and sleep.. And read.. And nap, and get all the scritches she wants. And not think about anything else now that Gale doesn’t have a bomb in his chest.

‘’Gale, dear.. Stop shifting around.’’

‘’I’m trying to go through my notes, Tara. It’s important.’’ Gale replies with an awkward smile.

‘’Okay.. You’ve been in a mood after your last search. No sign of Dharma, I take it?’’

‘’Concerningly little, which I would’ve preferred.. If she wasn’t a problem.’’ Gale sighs, putting his notes away. ‘’Putting the pieces together, and the people I’ve interviewed.. I think someone may have kidnapped her. But the question… Is who?’’

‘’There’s always something they leave behind. You’ll figure it out. You’re a smart boy.’’ Tara purrs, then her eyes shift. ‘’If only you’d shave-’’

‘’AHA-’’ Gale interrupts Tara’s complaint about his beard and pulls up a drawing from his pile. 

‘’Eureka! It’s.. A doodle. Drawn by a child.’’ Tara rolls her eyes. ‘’Care to explain what I’m missing?’’

‘’It’s not a doodle, it’s a symbol, one left behind by psionic magic. Just poorly transcribed and scribbled by the witness.’’

‘’Psionic..? Doesn’t your friend Tav have psionic abilities?’’ 

‘’Yes, but the source.. Is Illithid. We might be dealing with mind flayers.’’

‘’Why would mind flayers kidnap your deranged student..?’’ Tara licks her paw.

Gale thinks for a moment, biting on the metallic part of his quill. ‘’Hmm, I’ve theorised for a while, but I think Tav might have been leaving some sort of trace, like.. An unconscious signal. One that attracts Illithids and blocks out others. He might be mistaken for a rogue or a lost hivemind member.’’

‘’And why would they grab Dharma if they want Tav?’’

‘’To question her maybe..? Huh.. I think it’s time I ask a professional on the matter.’’ Gale rises from his comfortable sitting position, forcing Tara to jump off with an annoyed huff.

‘’Now where did I leave my sending scrolls..? By Mystra’s watchful eye, This place is starting to look like my tower..’’ 

‘’Careful, don’t put Mystra’s name in your mouth, Gale. She might bat an eye.’’

‘’Oh trust me, I made sure she’d leave me be, I am a thriving single man!’’ Gale puts his hands to his hips while he leans over a crowded desk.

‘’So you say..’’ Tara mumbles, ‘’I still would love some grand-kittens.’’

‘’Oof, and here I was thinking you were proud of me choosing myself. That hurt, Tara.. Ah, there it is!’’ Gale rolls open a scroll, before he puts the quill to the paper itself, he thinks of direct words without wasting the spell..

Hopefully his dear friend, foe of Vlaakith and great warrior, Lae’zel herself, was eager for a little trip to Neverwinter.