#I hope this isn't too rude
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How monumentally stupid is this? A 4-month-old? How are you not intellectually embarrassed by holding an opinion like this? I mean surely, I'm an atheist by the way, surely what you're doing by having so little respect for God that you would think he was this stupid is worse than being an atheist even in your stupid backward twisted nonsensical morality. This isn't just dumb, it's like a fundamental betrayal of intellect, like you're a traitor to all human sensibility and reason. I mean even to someone who doesn't believe in God I have more respect for him than you do if you honestly think that this somehow makes sense in some obscene, absurd way. Your brain is fundamentally broken if you believe this. You wonder why people are leaving Christianity? It's because you're making it so obvious that it's idiotic. I mean the lies and the nonsenseicality of it all are a good start, but this is like waving a giant red flag that says âthe only people on my side are moronsâ.
I mean honestly this is like a reductio ad absurdum of the idea that all Christian theology is grounded in intellect.
#babies are sinners too#I just can't even#I hope this isn't too rude#I'm just really angry#I promise you my initial reaction was much better worded than this#anyway. I hope I don't get in trouble for posting this
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Part 4 of the Vesperia differences between JP and the dub!
Part 1.
Part 2.
Part 3.
(Other) GTF Favorites.
As a heads up, I had to piece several images here as "one" image to circumvent the image limit because I was not about to make a part five by the time I got toward the end LOL.
For some reason the dub completely removed Alexei jokingly/sarcastically saying it makes his heart hurt (brings him down in this tl) how Estelle will come to her senses and see what she's done to her friends. As usual, the dub has a very weird habit of adding sentences where they never existed and completely removing sentences for no literally no reason.
I feel that "set you free" can also have the implication of saving her alive (which the dub heavily seems to lean toward versus wording that really shows Yuri's resolve here, the latter of which fits right in with Flynn and Ioder's acceptance that he may have to kill her), so I included this one to go with the previous case of Flynn mentioning that Yuri's group was going to "save" Estelle. The original is more ambiguous about her possible survival, but the dub leans more into being ambiguous in a way that doesn't lean toward her dying.
The dub changed this to nothing but literally "aye" so... do with that what you will.
Another case of them randomly wiping out an entire sentence (the last one).
As with other cases, there are some slight changes I don't feel are worth mentioning and often tend to be just slight changes in word choice that ultimately mean close to the same thing. This is generally the case for most of the spirit gathering arc. The overall tl of this arc is pretty much accurate, just with some odd cases like the above.
I really don't wanna say like, it's because Flynn's not around for a chunk of the plot in arc 3, but uh... let's be honest, it's once again as soon as Flynn gets back into the picture that the tl starts to go haywire again - especially where Yuri is concerned. Like. Literally. As usual.
In the dub, this was "but Duke isn't". Just putting this one here because I feel like this gives more of a sense how the characters are feeling about it, more than just him not working out in their favor.
This one was calling Ba'ul "weak" in the dub, but here Yuri is just asking if he's that stubborn about changing his form to a spirit. Putting this here because I feel using "weak" is a lot more harsh and has negative connotations on it compared to a more ignorant "stubborn" before Yuri understands.
Yuri mentions here that Duke seems to have thought a lot about what he's doing. In the dub, this was "he seems totally obsessed". Not sure what the reason for that change was.
Raven makes this more of a question in the dub, but here is more of him realizing it and putting the pieces together, so I figured I'd include this one since it's a slight change in a character's perception of something.
The first line was changed to "could you be any more worthless" (I guess because they thought the "boring" line was weird? idk lol). The second and third line got swapped for some reason, even though it does kind of change the general meaning behind what's being said.
Yuri says first that Sodia gave up, only to tell her she has no right to say it was all for Flynn (thus saying it's because of giving up). At least imo, in the dub it comes across as "you say it's for him but you gave up thus it's an excuse", versus "you have no right to say it's for him".
I'm trying not to say it again, y'all.
Karol says that Yuri going off alone is a bad habit. The dub changed this to "you keep forgetting us", which I'm kind of confused by because he's not forgetting them and literally told them to get ready to go to Tarqaron. Not really sure why they'd change this line since like yeah, it is a bad habit of his lol.
Another translation error in the dub, so this one's here for clarification. The dub says Astal "lost control", but Astal by this point is dead (and he never "lost control"). Judith also says in the dub that it made all the monsters gather here, rather than saying they've gone savage. It seems like they misunderstood something thinking Astal losing control brought all the monsters here, but obviously we know that can't be the case because Astal is dead.
This was changed in the dub to "it's our turn to do Yuri a favor", when he's actually supposed to be teasing him, which Yuri directly replies to.
Still trying not to say it.
Dub Karol sounds more like he's prepared to go in, but in the original audio, Karol sounds nervous about the hoard they're about to have to get involved with. Raven's line was changed to Flynn looking like he needs help and not that so much that he's cornered, and the original audio has him sounding more urgent about it. Minor changes here, but tonally I think they impact the scene differently (and definitely give more of a "this is really fuckin' dangerous" vibe in the original audio).
Another slight change and not an important one, but figured I'd include this since it has a slightly different meaning/vibe to it.
Including this just for Yuri's little laugh when he shows up (I love him! A Yuri Lowell!) and Flynn's shocked response. More tonal in change, but definitely worth a listen and will be linked below with Flynn's laugh!
This can also be translated as "it's simple/it will be simple", because it's "me and you" doing it. Imo this makes it more clear he's referring to just them (i.e. the upcoming fight) and not the entire group, but Yuri also specifically specifies "you and me", so it's much more clear that he's referring only to them (which I think, also given Yuri's levity in this situation despite the danger, shows how much they've completely come back from and recovered from the Nordopolica/Alexei stuff). Shoutout to Yuri deciding this on the spot and totally not even planning it though.
Again, there are some wording choice changes littered around, but nothing really significant (when I say small things, I mean things like Rita saying it's reckless for just the two of them to deal with this, versus the dub using "are you stupid?!". It basically changes nothing even if it is technically a difference, but I usually skip things like that because these posts would be even longer for changes that don't have a large impact).
As for the Yuri-Flynn-Repede battle, there were some... choice dialogue changes here.
Firstly, Yuri actually tells Flynn to be careful (rare carefulness from him, especially in regard to someone he knows can handle fighting).
Second, Flynn telling him not to worry was removed entirely.
Third, (this one is more difficult for me to completely discern because of the lack of text) Flynn mentions (you too, i.e. you be careful too) if Yuri keeps looking over (at him), that he won't be able to run to save Yuri fast enough (i.e. he'll get into trouble if he keeps staring at him).
Fourth, the dub changed Yuri saying he's just captivated by how handsome/good looking Flynn is (and I shit you not if Judith said that to Yuri people would call it flirting so yes, I am going to tell you that the dub censored men flirting here). The original wording used is "ii otoko", i.e. good/nice looking man, which in translation could come across a bit awkwardly and would be more likely to officially be translated to "handsome"... if they weren't so spooked at the idea of it and had to wipe it for "the great Flynn Scifo" which is not actually what was said. Personally I'd say "nice looking man" has a very specific ring to it versus handsome, but again, obviously that might sound a bit odd in translation without really specific wording (as in, it's possible to be used in a way that doesn't sound awkward but the wording leading up to it would probably have to be changed a little, or some words simply added in to make it flow more native-sounding).
Fifth, Flynn said it's not the time to be making jokes (the dub changed this to just "sh-shut up!").
Sixth, the goofy, playful tone Yuri carries when he says "I am being serious" was changed (very typical of the dub at this point though to remove his playfulness and I'm literally saying that objectively). Similarly, his following line's tone was also changed.
Seventh, "so we're kind of stuck". Yuri says he can't concentrate without talking, then ends (the battle conversation) with a following sentence of "it can't be helped!".
This could be translated in a few ways just to make it more clear what he's referring to (because a plain ol' "it can't be helped" is a bit too vague here), but you could translate that to something like "guess we can't help it", yadda yadda. My guess is that's where "we're kind of stuck" came from, but given the blatant trajectory change of the entire conversation, I'm not surprised I'm left feeling like the meaning of that line is just weird (primarily because he says that and the conversation abruptly ends, so they're not very stuck if Flynn won that one!) Something like "guess we can't help it/that's just how we are" etc imo would have done the job for translating that.
Flynn just sounds so, so happy and soft and my heart is full. Same dialogue in the dub, but the original audio was (imo much?) more lighthearted and so sweet and soft.
Made a clip of both their laughs because they're adorable and I love them.
No idea why the dub actually dropped her giving Yuri a whole ass honorific. Yeah, you can't always use JP suffixes in a dubbed game, but you can translate some of them to the closest thing they mean. Sodia here calls him "Yuri-...dono...", so rather than just dropping his last name in her accusatory tone, she calls him by only his first name and attaches a respectful term to his name.
Technically "dono" would mean "lord" or "master" in a non nobility manner, and is more of a formality than if she were to use, say, -san, which would have her referring to him as more of a regular/casual equal (-san is a suffix that often gets lost in translation, whereas dono can actually be roughly translated like it is here from this translator. Someone of her rank would still refer to others even equal to her rank as "sir" in translation, while people who use "dono" may also still use that term for people of their rank. Remember, at this point she's the second in command to the Commandant himself, so that's an awfully high bar for Yuri to have jumped in her eyes). Sodia has realized his actions have been just and honest and that she was very wrong about him, so as an indicator that she's changing her stance on him, she refers to him this way instead.
Basically, coming from someone of her rank, it's a very respectful term and is not used casually/in a casual relationship, much less to someone one dislikes or even hates (which she previously did, so this by itself is a massive step up in her view of him just from her suffix usage alone).
Honestly a huge shame that they didn't even translate this to "sir" in the dub when there was no reason not to. Just using that alone would have indicated a much higher level of respect from her toward him, and unfortunately that open respect is completely lost to dub only players (she only expresses her guilt, whereas in the original, just by using "dono" alone, she's indicated respect and not just guilt. In a way you could even argue that she's approaching him, someone she gives her respect to now, for advice and not just out of guilt alone).
In the dub this is only "it would have been easier if you'd blame me for this..." Here she's admitting she wants some form of punishment by way of saying she didn't receive it (which she could have from Yuri himself if he told Flynn what she did), but if she can't even have that, she at least would rather be hated. Basically, she's saying she wants to be hated if she can't at least be punished for her crime (and I believe you could also translate this to wishing she could be hated if she wasn't blamed for it, so basically they removed half the statement).
Also, in general, Sodia sounds very distraught.
Here Yuri admits he does have a grudge against her (you could translate this to something like "it's not like I don't hold a grudge against you"). The dub changed this to "don't think I'm doing this for your own good". Basically the dub is having him say he's making her live with her regret without mentioning that yes, he does in fact have a grudge against her for what she did.
The translation here is essentially the same (think about it for yourself. The dub just uses "go figure it out yourself").
The important part here comes in the form of how he refers to her. This is something he's done since he survived her stabbing him - not using a neutral form of "you" but instead openly using a rude form (in JP there are several ways of referring to oneself and others, similar to how Flynn alternates between boku and watashi when referring to himself).
In other words, Yuri is openly expressing disdain for her by using "teme". At this point he's been using it for a little while now (he also talks to her this way back in Nor at the inn as well. Worth noting that he starts out by using "omae" (neutral), but as soon as she drops the "I did it for Captain Flynn's sake", he hops to "teme" in a heartbeat, because of saying it was for Flynn but having just given up on him. Yuri continues using "teme" from that point on), but since here it's with very other little dialogue and also because she just recently referred to him as "Yuri-dono", I think it's a perfect time to point it out, as they've openly, verbally switched how they treat each other.
Sodia, wracked with guilt and left unresolved, has a newfound respect for Yuri after their interaction at Nor (and presumably everything he's done for Flynn). Yuri, still angry at her for what she did and holding a grudge (a fact lost in the dub that he mentions in this scene as mentioned above, adding to this role reversal), now openly chastises her and expresses his contempt by changing how he refers to her.
NEXT!
Not gonna put a picture here for it, but when Rita asks Witcher where his notes are, she gets super excited and it's just cute and funny.
Also not putting a picture here for this one, but Flynn sounds extremely relaxed/calm/casual in JP when he asks if Yuri is all set/ready to talk. Something worth noting is that even at this point, the dub keeps Flynn sounding very uptight and serious where he otherwise is relaxed, calm or even emotional. I get the feeling the dub kind of missed the mark with Flynn's soft gentle side. I don't know how or why, but it's more absent in the dub where he's otherwise much more soft.
Similarly, not pictured because this isn't about the translation, Flynn trying to convince Yuri to tell everyone what he's done is given in a more angry-upset tone, versus the original's (super!) soft and sad tone. Again, I think they had a different perception of Flynn in mind when it comes to audio (particularly in arc 3 here because the other arcs are... again, their own whole can of worms), because here he's speaking sadly that Yuri won't take credit, whereas in the dub it's more energy-fueled and comes off much harsher. I have a video clip of that scene here. I felt like mentioning it here because overall Flynn can be extremely soft and gentle in tone and it got lost in the dub for whatever the reason was.
Still on that train of thought, while the translation itself is still pretty accurate, Flynn says "I'll just yell at you again" but in JP says that he'll just say unnecessary words. Earlier, in the dub Yuri asks why he's so serious when he doesn't actually mention that he's being serious in the original (because honestly, he wasn't. He was very calm when they set out). In this case it's not really negative (the way Yuri yelling at people in the dub is portrayed negatively on their end), it's just... a change that I can only guess they had the wrong idea about with him? Previously the changes with Flynn were treating him negatively, but here it's more just... a notable but narratively generally neutral tone difference.
Not making a clip just for this unless it's requested, but when Yuri wins the solo fight against Flynn, in the original, Yuri says it with actual shock but awareness/clarity that it actually happened (with a sort of underlying excited vibe to it). In the dub Yuri says it with more of a laugh and disbelief.
As for this point onward, since the subbed playthrough ended before this point, I'll be using another playthrough for images, though I'll be translating them here instead since they won't be pre-translated.
Sliiightly different vibe here so I figured I'd include it (doesn't really change anything): Here Flynn says "Even with a sword... I lost." The reason I'm including it is because "I can't even win with a sword anymore" makes it sound like Flynn has been losing again and again to Yuri in various ways when it's always been the opposite. Using a sword has always been one of his highest selling points, so to lose in that area comes across more as, even with my best asset I still lost to you.
Yuri's line is more like, "(laughs) Serves you right."
Running out of images I can use for this post here but I really don't want to make another part at this point in the game, but Flynn's following line is more along the lines of "be proud of yourself" (literally "raise your arms (in victory/pride)"), to which Yuri says the same thing in both versions (Flynn's dub line is "you've gotten better"). Including this because "you've gotten better" to me isn't really the same as telling Yuri to be proud of himself for the victory (something he'd never been able to do before). Since the dub came across as much more casual, I figured I'd add this part here too.
During Flynn and Patty's conversation, Flynn says "it's true there is no end to my worries." In the dub this was, "I have no want for trouble". This was probably a mix up of terms/intended meaning honestly, because Patty was basically saying he has a lot of burdens for being so young. It's not about trouble so much as he just has a lot on his mind and a lot to worry about in his current position.
Flynn proceeds to say he's made up his mind, basically saying he's made up his mind to accept those worries. In the dub, he says he's prepared to face it (the troubles), versus that he's made up his mind in accepting these new worries.
Patty's response is "made up your mind?" In the dub it's just "is that right?"
Flynn continues by saying in the end he'll have to worry a lot (more literally with all his might, so basically he'll be experiencing a whole lot of worries in the future) and that it will be a tough road, but he won't run away anymore.
I'm not sure why the dub used "path full of pain" since that sounds a lot more dramatic than "it will be a tough road". I imagine yeah, there will be pain in the future, but full of pain just sounds a bit... much? The dub also removed "anymore" from "won't run away anymore". Not sure what the idea behind that was.
Patty follows up saying it's admirable but that's no good, which the dub changed to a fish pun.
I'd also like to mention at this point, Flynn has completely dropped his use of "watashi" in favor of "boku" (he uses boku normally, but typically switched to watashi for formality/his status as a knight, which indicates he no longer feels the need to do this around Yuri's friends, and possibly does not feel the same level of distance he used to. At the very least it means he's allowing himself to be more of himself/more familiar and not viewing his position as a knight so formally).
Here Flynn says "thinking together, worrying together, and then one day realizing the world we dreamed of". Adding this since Flynn in the dub says "if we all work through our troubles together". It's kind of the same thing and kind of not, since in the original Flynn isn't mentioning "troubles" between anyone - simply the idea of everyone doing this together (the rest is basically the same in the dub).
Another change I'm not sure what it was for, but Ioder never mentions the Entelexeia specifically. He says this (what he's about to say) concerns the empire, guilds and everyone who lives in the world (which would include the Entelexeia by default, but literally everyone else too, which is the point because he's about to tell them about the blastia to start making plans). The dub never mentions about this affecting everyone in the world despite that being the whole reason he wants to talk to everyone about this.
Yuri calls Duke an "ignorant fool" here, rather than a "stubborn bastard", which I'm including because "ignorant" and "stubborn" aren't the same thing. Yes, Duke is stubborn about it, but in Yuri's eyes he's also being very ignorant of everything they're trying to tell him.
Not grabbing an image for this, but at the end of the game when Yuri is talking to Duke right after the battle, he's completely out of breath before and when he starts talking (the first line). Just a very nice touch!
In the dub Duke says Eluficer's wish was simply to protect the world and all living things. Here Duke says his wish is to protect the world and all living things with a good heart.
Also don't want to use an image here because of the image limit per post (especially because it's already tight even with me putting what images I can into "one" image as it is), but Yuri says "yeah, let's do it" (including the others), versus "I'm on it" in the dub at Flynn's prompting. Not a big change, but he does treat it as the whole group doing it together, which I find to be a nice touch for his character development.
Patty actually says "it- it stopped?!" The dub goofed and wrote "it's- it's over?!". The power of the blastia wasn't enough and its power was weakening.
Estelle says "No way, after we've come this far!". The dub changed this for some reason to "but how? There isn't any more!" in response to Rita instead of leaving it as it was.
Judith says "Please!" The dub used "It's gotta work!"
Flynn says "It's not over yet!" For some reason the dub used "This can't be how it ends!", which... idk, I feel like original Flynn has much more faith in it LOL.
Yuri says "Is it no good...?" Dub Yuri says "Dammit... come on!"
For the most part the rest is the same.
Adding this in because the old cutscene in the 360 version had to get changed to accommodate where Flynn was. Somewhat different than what we see with the other characters, you can see the power shoot out and push Flynn back as if it was grabbing the blastia itself, and you can see it pulled away from him (with everyone else we just see the blastia head toward the rest!).
Aside from that, Flynn says "you are my pride, dear friend" (the dub changed this to "I am so proud to call you my friend, Yuri Lowell").
The voice acting took me out with the happiness portrayed in Flynn's voice. (For just the Flynn part of the ending, I have a clip of that too, unsurprisingly.)
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Personal ending notes:
To sum it up briefly: I personally see a strong inserted bias put into the localization instead of just keeping things the way they were (i.e. changing context/character behavior to fit their bias despite that not being what the original context was, and inserting this into an official release). I say this because there are times when the translation is basically perfect, but there are very specific characters and instances where this suddenly changes, and unfortunately, there's a repetitive pattern that to me reads as intentional. Otherwise, I see no need for that to continuously happen only when select characters are involved.
As for the not so short version, y'all might be wondering why I mention things like it seems like they changed Yuri and berated Flynn so much on purpose. This is because the translation of this game sometimes can be astoundingly spot on. Perfect in some cases, even. There are times when the largest difference is just the wording itself and is simply given flavor, or uses a variety of wording so that sentences don't sound repetitive.
Yet when it comes to those two (individually but also between the two of them), the context quickly devolves into being either completely changed, the tones used are completely changed, and/or there's a slight alteration in the text that ends up giving a very particular notion that was not otherwise there (ex. "like a good knight" was added into Flynn's dialogue in a situation where he's being berated and yelled at, and it completely comes across as putting Flynn down the entire way through the conversation, versus him coming around and taking responsibility and that being accepted. In the original he simply mentions following his orders as a knight. There's no attempt to sound like the narrative itself is trying to insult him or bring him down).
I made these posts precisely because a heavy majority of the changed context involved them, and a lot of it either portrays Flynn in a negative light for the vast majority of the game which was not originally present, or it made Yuri come across as a much darker, scarier, "cool" type, which is a pretty stark contrast to his original personality/behavior.
Other things:
Yuri:
A lot of his lines come out neutral/flat, and that got even worse, like a hundred times worse, in his new DE lines. Yuri is pretty peppy in JP, and as a reference I would say his victory quotes are a big indicator of the personality shift ("cool" guy versus "silly" guy would be a big one for me). Other than that, Yuri is more silly and almost childish, sometimes even pretty pouty, and it shows blatantly right in his voice. He's also extremely not threatening to people who are not his enemy (liiike threatening Ioder with a real weapon with a serious voice).
I think the easiest way to explain this from my own perspective is that I adore JP Yuri completely. Dub Yuri I often find myself wanting to punch in the face for how he treats Flynn, Ioder and the one time, Leblanc. He lacks compassion in the dub where he otherwise does have it (even if it's not him being rude vocally/tonally, the dub dropped a load of emotional nuance in his voice). He's not a rough, overly cool edgy man (I hate people saying Yuri is an edgelord because damn if that ain't the farthest thing from the truth in JP, but it also shows how much they really leaned into that trope in the dub if people actually walked out of the game feeling that way about Yuri). He's a silly, goofy, caring man who is very gentle with people when they need a boost. That doesn't mean he doesn't have his "scary" dark moments, but the dub obviously leaned super far into it - enough that they would change Yuri mentioning punching someone to outright threatening to use a weapon against an unarmed man who is actually being quite polite.
Basically, he has a range of emotions and he has a lot of emotional intelligence. As one example, when he sees Karol down and sad when they first meet, he changes his tone to a combination of how you'd talk to a child with that child-y tone (he does this at the base of Halure's tree when he's asking Karol how to heal the tree), but then sometimes he shifts to actual gentle and soft to let Karol know he's there for him (when he's heading out to the woods to find the eggbear).
Ultimately, my point is that they took a perfectly well rounded character and changed him to, what? Fit their own bias/agenda/whatever? Because I can't look at both Yuris and be like "same person". I've never wanted to punch JP Yuri in the face. Only hugs here. What I'm saying is that I came out of both versions with two very different opinions on Yuri.
Next, Flynn (and Ioder and Leblanc).
Starting with Flynn, I get a very strong mindset of anti government shoved into the dub with these characters (i.e. not just the unnamed bad people in the government and the few named bad ones, but also directed toward the good ones, making it a more black and white approach). The dub makes Yuri out to be aggressive toward Flynn on the spot when they see each other again despite that in the original audio, he's not at all actually upset. He understands why Flynn is upset and that he's stressed out with his current mission. And no, the whole "Flynn swung a sword at him!" doesn't work here. Yuri knows Flynn. Very, very well. He reeeeally was not mad about that... especially if, you know, his tone in JP was anything to go by during and after. Flynn was the more upset one between the two, and Yuri remains calm - again, indicating his emotional intelligence and, most likely as it's not directly said, determining that being worked up about it would only cause Flynn more aggravation/stress. Thus, he doesn't press any buttons and remains calm. It makes his smile to Flynn later at Torim make that much more sense.
The thing is, I get the impression the dub wanted us rooting for Yuri and cheering for him digging into Flynn, when that was literally not the point of their interactions. We're not supposed to always blindly follow Yuri. Sometimes he is right, but sometimes Flynn is right. Like. That's it. That's the game. Not everything is simple or black and white. There's nuance.
That and/or like, someone in the loc team really hated Flynn. Based on everything, I'm... not against believing that at this point. Basically, the dub portrays Flynn in a negative light at most (arguably all) possible opportunities around every turn, even though the context/tone for that did not originally exist, until it couldn't anymore (i.e. he was past his character arc).
Ioder and Leblanc.
Ioder never does anything except keep Yuri in the loop, tell him important information and be genuinely happy to see him. There was never any vitriol between them. The way dub Yuri gives him an attitude just comes out of nowhere. Their relationship is pretty casual, which is pretty meaningful given that Ioder is on track to be on the emperor and Yuri is, plain and simple, a commoner. One who rescued Ioder, yes, but if Ioder was a "typical" noble in this game, he might have just brushed that off as "to be expected", even if Yuri didn't know he was saving a noble at first. Point being, Ioder is nothing but pleasant toward Yuri. Yuri has no reason to be rude, much less threaten him.
At Baction, JP Yuri is understanding that Leblanc needs to grieve and is in disbelief. He doesn't know if Leblanc will try to stop them, but he does offer his condolences with the tone of his voice, i.e. again: emotional intelligence. Something they changed in the dub to be nothing but rudeness and anger. Yuri made a statement to him at that moment, i.e. not to get in their way (mind you, again, he's polite about it given the situation), but not without understanding in his tone, which is a very common aspect of Yuri in his entirety. His wording (in general, not strictly with this specific scene) comes out rough and lacks politeness, but that's made up for in how he speaks to people (either relaxed, casual, gentle, etc).
In other words, the dub pretty much always slaps a point of view bias against these characters and uses Yuri as their proxy for it. Yuri, normally, in the original context, just treats them as human beings with ebb and flow in all of their emotions and situations. Things aren't black and white - humans are complex - and that is not the point of view that I feel we're given by way of dub Yuri. We're given a man who is constantly using anger in his voice toward imperial figures even when it's completely unwarranted, and even when he knows the people in question.
Other Stuff:
Assorted things are different mainly because of the acting, but Raven's goofiness got toned way down and Karol screams much... quieter, I guess you could say. They're both more lively in general though than how they were in the dub, so that's a plus from me too.
Rita is significantly softer with Estelle in JP, and she also is much more noticeably devastated about Raven's "death" and more panicked for Karol at Zopheir. I do love Michelle Ruff's portrayal and don't know that I truly have a preference, but I think a lot of Rita's emotional barrier breaking is truly expressed more in JP.
You know I gotta bring it up: Yuri and Flynn's relationship was kind of a mess in the dub. It gives the impression of Yuri being angry a lot more often than he ever actually is, and gives off the impression that we're supposed to dislike Flynn more than we're supposed to like him. Flynn isn't someone we're supposed to actively dislike, but the portrayal of him as expressed through dub Yuri does not come off as "we're supposed to like or root for this guy", when they're much closer than that in JP.
So yeah. The bulk of this is that Yuri is just not the same person to me between versions. Also, Vesperia has way more content in Japan (drama CDs galore frankly, and Yuri is still insanely popular in Japan and is thus a frequent character alt release in the gacha games and so has tons of voice lines and general story content, there's new merch of him every year because they make merch for the characters that have their voice actors showing up to TalesFes, etc).
There's much more ease in seeing JP Yuri's personality through all of it. I think it may be more difficult for people who don't understand Japanese or any Japanese at all, and that's such a shame to me because all those people get otherwise, without anyone posting about JP Yuri, is this... weird shell of Yuri that I sometimes even hesitate to call a shell because he just feels completely different to me.
Anyway uh I love Yuri (and Flynn) and that was the point of all this, but uh... if you made it this far thank you bunches and I hope people who maybe didn't like Yuri and/or Flynn who only knew the dub will change their perspectives. đââď¸
#GTF JP Vesperia Stuff#Yuri Lowell#you know... one of the best ways to express Yuri's differences is that I could never imagine dub Yuri's voice#coming out of Yuri's mouth with all the official artwork he gets in JP LOL#he's like. the most feminine nearly dainty motherfucker out of any of the guys (except like. Jay. who he's on par with LOL)#Japan out here putting bows+ribbons in his hair calling him Yuri hime in an anni skit and putting him in a dress in a drama CD and my god#but yeah regardless in the game the differences are... so much. SO so so so much vocal difference ESPECIALLY#there's just. a lot. and I feel like the dub did a MASSIVE disservice to Yuri as a character/as a person#similarly I'd say the same thing happened to Flynn with them doing a MASSIVE disservice to him in the same way#a LOT of Flynn's softness was flattened imo just... not as badly as everything about Yuri#JP Yuri is SUUUPER expressive in his tone and it's such an immersive experience#but also it like breaks my heart seeing how some ppl portray Yuri in the western fandom#esp with Flynn bc it's so so different from the JP fandom. and like again#it's bc the dub has Yuri being REALLY mean and rude to Flynn SO SO often#and he just sounds so bitchy so often when he's not supposed to at all!#there's so much to love abt JP Yuri and he's just... my silly little guy and I love him sm#and honestly my main problem isn't even with the character they made him out to be in the dub so much as#it's the fact that they changed him at all but also that they changed him and flattened him#like... I don't hate the character himself I hate what they did to create him bc it was at the cost of. well. -gestures-#I just think that JP Yuri is a significantly better character and it's a shame I think that at all bc#they shouldn't feel like two different characters at all but they do#I hope if you read this far that you'll give JP Yuri a chance bc he is SO precious and JP Flynn is ALSO SO precious#I wish I wasn't so upset abt what the dub did bc it'd make my life easier LOL#but I love my boys too much so... here we are I guess lol
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Sorry if this is dumb but where is your dni?
Really just all that's in my pinned post. I feel like it goes without saying that I don't want pedophiles/zoophiles or whatever they're called now (bc there's new names everyday) on my page as well as like. racists and ableist people and queerphobes and shit. So I didn't really feel like I needed to make a big long dni stating the obvious. I haven't really worked on it at all because like. Shit really all I want is for creeps and homphobes/transphobes etc etc to stay off my page.
And I've just got such a stressed and busy brain atm, I just wanted to make the general statements and stuff. Maybe I'll add all that I've mentioned later.
#asks#I hope this didn't sound rude or snippy I feel like it does#but I mean yeah I don't have like. Majorly big things? Atm at least? My brain is too swamped to remember.#I guess I could work up the motivation but from personal experience. putting those things up sometimes doesnt' work#I don't shade the people who have them ofc bc they do work the other times and setting boundaries isn't a bad thing at all#but like man. I just want people to be decent to me. If you're not a kid liker and you're not disrespectful towards me or my existence-#-then really like. its cool ig. I've been a not great person in my past so I don't feel like I have much room to judge#OBVIOUSLY I'm working on myself now though. I'm on a whole self-improvement/self-reflection journey and I'm getting better#but like you get what I mean yeah
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three body problem cosmic horror sci-fi au where geto's brain goes out to space and all gojo has left of him is a star
#how do i erase them from my head#can't even enjoy other things without jjk so rudely barging into the conversation#i hope this isn't too much spoiler for people who want to watch or read the series đ
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"please don't do that" = my inspiration to do that
#late night phonecall with my boy. gotta stop answering bc i say way too much#anyways. decided to tell him about how i would like. not eat on purpose and i was skinny#said that it was several years ago tho and didn't mention anything more recent#tbf it was most serious several years ago and hasn't gotten that bad since then#anyways. during the convo i said something about how i WAS skinny at this time then got fat over this time#bc he was asking for a bit of a timeline#and he was like. i don't think you got fat i think you got healthy#and said i look good and don't need to lose weight etc like awwww đĽ°#anyways. made a joke about looking like [redacted] and he was like no please don't do that#he wants me to be healthy and eat and not lose weight etc#and i was joking at the time but that convo inspired me to grind harder to really lose some weight đŞ#and i feel kinda bad bc i know he doesn't want me to and would be a lil upset if he found out#but it's my life not his#he doesn't have to find out. unless he notices that i look different. i HOPE#btw the [redacted] part isn't a rude joke or me being mean to anyone. it just could be some sort of thinspo/trigger so i don't wanna say it#i feel like it looks like it could have been someone's name. it's not a specific person or anything#ed tw#Sera
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hello everyone! in light of a recent ask i have just recieved i just wanted to make just a few little things clear.
i do not control who wins or loses a poll. that depends entirely on how you vote. you are free to encourage others to vote for your choice through tags, comments, or any sort of propaganda.
on that note, if you create any sort of propaganda in places other than the tags, i will most likely reblog it.
however. this tournament is meant to be silly and light-hearted. please do not be rude to voters who vote differently than you, and know that i will avoid posting anything that bashes any particular character as much as possible.
i do not care if you hate a character with all your heart and soul, but i would prefer to keep it clear from this blog. we're here to do something silly and fun for everyone, regardless of favourite and least favourite members of the cast. this means keeping to solely positive discussions of the characters.
that's all! sorry for any inconvenience.
#mod post!#announcement!#sorryâ i do hope this isn't too harsh or anything#but i would prefer to keep this a more positive space without any kind of insults directed at Any of the characters#which all is to sayâ i don't care what you put in your tags in your own reblogâ on your own blog#but if you send me an ask that could only be interpreted as you being rude to a characterâ it will not be posted no matter what.#once againâ sorryâ hope this is understandable#anyway! back to more fun things!
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~
#first day of work after a month and I wanna cry#waking up at ass o'clock isn't funny when you're not on vacation#I forgot my headphones at home#also I was getting there early but the train is late#people are rude and don't respect personal space#also they talk too loud#I hate it here#unemployment is the best thing that could happen to my mental health right now#I'm not even kidding lol#working for a living is torture#(I'm not even at work yet)#(this is what happens when I'm forced to listen to my thoughts in the morning)#anyway I hope everyone has a great day#I'll just try to survive it đ
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Hey @blues-sues, they consume me enjoy.
In the rain
Hidden under a rough covering of leaves, two Mewtwo sheltered themselves from the rain with the little dip huddling close for warmth as the rain splattered heavily around them. The red hued one kept his arms wrapped around his companion holding them close protectively, eyes constantly scanning his surroundings trying to pinpoint any abnormal movement or sounds from around the rain, his eyes darting to leaves that bounced under fat water droplets or branches that swayed in a gust.
He jolted flinching as a droplet that had rolled across the leaves fell on his back, water still getting them within their makeshift shelter. Feeling her shiver he held her tighter pulling her closer as rain thumped around them. He tilted and moved his head desperate to hear over the rain or anything past the rain as another droplet hit his arm then his tail. He couldn't help the growl that started to grumble and grow within the back of his throat and as it to insult him a drop plonked onto his head causing him to jolt and shift his body weight. His companion made a soft noise as she felt him moving.
He moved into a crouch, his arms still wrapped around his friend, his tail thumping into the sopping wet ground causing mud to fly around, his eyes frantic as the rain continued to pour indiscriminately around them.
He felt his companion lightly jump in his arms as rain hit her on the cheek, despite her quietly giggling at the sensation and surprise he felt aggressive. He shifted on his toes feeling quills starting to form under his body, his body beginning to stretch and morph. He felt his fingers and toes extending elongating outwards, his digits sinking into the dirt as he growled, feeling surrounded by thousands of unseen enemies and untraceable threats. He shoved himself upwards from his crouch standing and storming out into the rain even as his limbs screamed at him to not move. He bellowed snarling furious at the rain turning in circles as he was lashed with water in feral deranged hysteria.
Throwing his thick quills from his wrists, they sank into the mud into tree trunks as he paced in a circle overwhelmed with pain and sounds. The rain was horrid and wet and cold on his body and wracked him full of chill even as his limbs and body burned in searing agony. His wrists and fingers quivered in uncontrollable subtle shaking between freezing anxiety and overwhelming pain, his foot sank into the mud whimpering with the pain shooting up his leg as his tail thrashed. Everything was just too much as he growled over his pain at the sky daring the weather to come and fight him personally, it was an unstoppable entity, an enemy that needed to be subdued even as rain hit his face and into his eyes.
Shivering from the sudden loneliness his companion of pinks moved carefully from where she was huddled making a soft oop as her horns touched the leaves above her head and splattered her head. She moved her hands to feel around to carefully shimmy out from the little shelter. Unable to see anything but the aura of others she managed to step into the open. She had seen other aura traces but right now all she could make out were the waves of bright red energy rolling off of her companion. His aura flared outwards in powerful waves that almost sent her stumbling backwards, but she could read him and she could feel his pain and terror. Even as his aura blinded her vision further with red and the outline of his taller form she approached, with practiced caution.
Her hand reached out and she managed to brush against his tail as it swayed past her hand thankfully going over his quills in a way that flattened them and left her unharmed. She heard his startled breath and the splat of mud as he turned quickly to confront her with a snarl before quietening into a whimper. Despite being blind to turned her head up to meet where his gaze should be and raised her hands upwards towards him. She couldn't actually reach but she didn't need to, she felt his hands quickly cupping the back of hers and his face burying quickly into her palms as he mumbled apologies into her hold. She rubbed her thumbs carefully against his cheeks as he buried into her hands feeling his tail curl around her and pull her closer as he moved into a crouch still using his hands to keep hers on his face. Slowly he moved his hands moving them instead to wrap around her body pulling her in closer to himself as he pressed his face into her neck as her hands moved one holding his face the other gently holding his neck. His aura waves were calming from erratic spikes and waves to small rolls of energy but she could still sense he was in pain even if he didn't express it.
She tilted her head to the side gently bonking against him and lightly rubbing her cheek against the side of his head near his horns offering a soft comforting purr. The rain pattered above them as a psychic barrier was made like an umbrella, she squeezed him just softly closer to her purring a bit deeper, "there you go," she comforted, "that's better yea?" She felt him nod into her neck.
Her hand moved from his neck to rub down his upper back carefully, his quills already flattened, she could feel his body starting to change once more, his aura signature shrinking as his body reduced in stature and size back to his regular form, though he still huddled into her. Even though he was quiet she knew he was still in pain, the mega evolution took a great physical toll on his body it was something he really shouldn't have done but she could understand why. Had he ever really heard or felt the rain before? She'd heard it a few times from her own room but she figured to him this was already so much especially with how anxious and protective he'd become. She gently squeezed him closer to her and he made a soft mrrp.
"Come on, let's head back to the shelter, wait for this rain to stop." He nodded into her neck once more his hold on her tightening as she moved, "Rig, you gotta let go so we can move," she giggled softly as he made a bit of a stubborn grumble moving to pick her up as she squealed and very much told him off and to put her down for his own sake before he hurt himself further.
"I know you're already going to be aching from that evolution. You stop being silly and put me down no lifting anything, oh my Arceus Rigger!!" He ignored her protests carrying her back to the shelter and ducking under inside keeping the protect barrier above them to offer more security and ease his overwhelmed senses. He put her down but didn't release.
"That was very foolish and you know it I can feel the pain in your aura," he buried himself into her neck wrapping his legs and tail around her to hold her close to him as she tutted thumping her tail a little to express her mild frustration at his lack of self care before sighing leaning into his warm hold. "You better take it easy from now on though Rig, you're still recovering if you continue to push yourself too far you could be seriously hurt." Her voice was soft but he could hear the clear worry in her tone as she cuddled herself into him.
"Sorry MelâŚ" His voice a mumble, "I'll, try..promise.." She sighed softly, the sincerity was clear in his aura despite him struggling for words. She leant into him comfortable in his hold and warm as she felt him mutually lean and press into her, closing her eyes she just listened to the rain with him.
#My writing#My oc#Friends oc#Rigger the mewtwo#@Blues-sues oc#@Blues-sues Melaleuca#I love ur girl#She's the only fucker with sense#Me: hasn't even revealed Riggers design. Also me: puts in fic#Hope this isn't rude as she hasn't been revealed yet#Also I'm imaging her aura vision is similar to the aura emotional vision from the Arceus movie where it like woo wibbly wavy energy#So she can see and pick up on his emotions by his aura and too much energy does have the physical affect of nearly making her stumble#Little extra treat for her#Rigger is a massive cuddle bug and an even bigger idiot#Probably not long went through horrid experiments then accidentally triggered his body into the second mega of that day#And then despite the huge body pains hes in from his body being stretched and changed he HAS to pick up his Mel#He's so fucking stupid honestly he shouldn't be lifting anything at all#But no gotta hold his fren#They're cuddly and I love them ur honor
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someone left a rude comment on my fic 10 thousand feelings hurt 100 million tears shed
#talking tag#thanks for reading a 30k fic and leaving a 2 paragraph comment about why you didn't like it#did you know you can just. stop reading?#and it was honestly a little sanist as well ngl#'I hope this isn't autobiographical bc then the author needs help' what a nice and helpful thing to say#UGH I really do hate that I take criticism so badly but I feel justified here bc#the comment was just like. super rude and then said my writing was ooc LOL#imagine taking the time to write 'you're crazy and this fic was bad + your writing is ooc too'#cannot stress enough that it's a 30k one shot. no one was forcing u to read the whole thing if u didn't like it
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every time I see Piepoe, I drop to my knees and start sobbing /positive
#I will not lie - Piepoe intimidated me only because âdifferent badâ#piepoe brought something new to the tag#but swallowed my anxiety and looked through the blog.....#and it's so wholesome and nice in there#I don't know why I felt such a strong fear! it's so sweet!!#I felt the same way about 0scum's artstyle too - intimidated cuz it's 'different'#but I did it!! I overcame anxiety!! and I love them lots /pla#go and be free.........#anyway I hope you don't mind my confessions - I wanted it to be a bit of a lesson to not turn ur nose up at something new all the time#at your own pace of course!#both artists are very good and insp me lots#I hope this doesn't come across as rude - but because they post what they post... it makes me feel less like MY stuff isn't allowed?#like if they're allowed to be so self indulgent#so am I! yknow??#I fear being 'bad' but - it's pizza tower of all heckin things
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Please, please, please watch âHeadless: A Sleepy Hollow Storyâ! It is all this and more!Â
(Itâs free on Youtube and they need your support but most importantly, itâs SO GOOD.)
i love you well crafted narratives i love you clever callbacks i love you seemingly nonsensical plot lines that begin to make perfect sense when they converge i love you sneaky little easter eggs you only notice on your second watch i love you consistent but not overdone motifs i love you deeply satisfying series finales i love you gratifying and tangible character development
#headless: a sleepy hollow story#it's one of the only shows if not the only show that has not disappointed me#and i don't say that lightly!#it just gets better and better#these are a few of my favourite things#tropes#gifs#user fatoujallovv#i hope this isn't too rude adding to this post#but this show is worth it :)#also the cameos are A+++
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as bad of an experience i had interacting with other atinys and arena staff at the Ateez concert i went to, it was so heartening to see how respectful and loving everyone was to Ateez themselves.
i really, really hope that i see carats giving Seventeen the same amount of love and respect on the upcoming tour
#this will be my first time seeing SVT in person (i was 13 when they debuted; this is the first US tour I haven't been in school for)#and im ngl lie.... im a little worried about how the reception is gonna be when they come to New York#im seeing the 2nd show on Sunday so we won't even be the first New York crowd- and the 4th show in the US tour total (plus the Goyang shows#and with some of the absolute vitriol ive seen directed at our boys recently? i really hope that energy doesn't come to the shows#like regardless of your personal opinion on what should be done in light of the cb/tt/spill the feels stuff-#if i hear the arena start booing the men who've been working tirelessly to get this far for over half my (and many other carats) lives?#genuinely? at that point we do not deserve them#idk man. this is probably just paranoia brain because its not a majority that are doing this in the first place#but for a short while it got really rough just seeing it constantly towards some of the members and it makes me nervous#i just want everyone to have a good time. is that too much to hope for?#shut up kugĹ#also this is NOT an invitation to talk to me about the cb/tt btw. i just needed to get this out and none of my irls care about kpop#rlly hope that doesn't come off as rude but i genuinely just don't have the energy to go in circles about it im sorry#also the majority of my concert experience is punk/metal where fans will openly boo and mock the performers if they don't like something-#so maybe this isn't something i need to be scared about at all? maybe kpop concerts just generally have more decorum?
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.
#idk why folks would join a collection that is moderated and unrevealed?#you can't see anything? is the hope that you *are* somehow noticed and approved by an the owner??#the collection says ''i dont want these publicly available anymore'' in the description#i know this is a bit of a fandom faux pas and ppl would prefer a fic be orphaned but that really isn't possible for this fic#too many outlinks and references to my own blog to edit out without deleting literally all author notes#plus so many rude comments that orphaning it felt like kicking this poor little thing out in the rain and shutting the door#i know the handful of folks who joined don't know the anxiety this fic has caused me but it just weirds me out#i was only looking in the collection to check what a setting looked like and then noticed that there were extra 'members'#now i'm feeling all heeb jeebed and anxious. i should not have looked đ
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kitty keychains and pudding paybacks
best friend!minho can't help but recall memories of him and fem!reader in the middle of their grocery trip
this is part 2 of silky shorts and stained shirts
genre: fluff, smut, angst (a little), college au
warnings: MDNI! condescending dom!minho, sub!reader, reader is physically sensitive, reader is inexperienced, minho and reader are not straight, pet names, grinding, nipple play, marking, praise, dirty talk, p in v, minho has a huge dick, a bit of pain from sex (just a little), oral f receiving, fingering, minho is really possessive, minho is an idiot when it comes to feelings
w.c.: 11.9k
a/n: i swore part 2 would be sweet, smutty, and simple but my fingers slipped and now we're at 11.9k words T_T hope it isn't too much! i rlly enjoyed writing this i hope u enjoy reading it as well.
you flinch at the sudden flash of light as you stuff sushi in your mouth.
the perpetrator is across you, smiling stupidly while holding his stupid phone in his stupid hand. you notice the people who were just peacefully eating in the dim restaurant look at you both with a disapproving stare which makes you mumble out a quiet apology.
minho doesnât seem to care, that idiot. you kick him below the table and he just giggles.
âdelete that!â you whisper at him aggressively. you both know itâs useless. his phone is a growing waste of every single embarrassing picture and video clip ever taken of his friends. and as someone whoâs with him like 90% of the time, youâre unfortunately 90% of his pesky camera roll.
âshh, go eat your foodâ, he hums, still grinning.Â
âi was eating until i was so rudely interrupted.â
âin my defense, i didn't know the flash was onâ, he retorts confidently as if that makes it better. âand most importantly, iâm storing memories. be grateful you have such a wonderful friend to do that for you. you suck at taking photosâ, he argues.
heâs right. you donât even have a quarter of the amount of photos he has. you keep reminding yourself to take more pictures for the memories since your memory itself sucks, but you always either forget or youâre too slow to capture the moment. minho says the growing amount of keychains on your phone case were the reason youâre so slow. as if he didnât add onto your collection with a personalized keytag of jureumi.Â
you watch minho watch you thinking about his words. annoying. you just poke your tongue out at him and he shakes his head at the childish display.
after a while, minho finishes his plate and you notice him eyeing yours. you already know whatâs running through that pretty head of his.Â
by your luck or maybe his excitement from planning his attack, he accidentally drops his chopsticks.Â
as heâs reaching out for it under the table with a silent fuck, you insert a pretty good chunk of wasabi into the sushi and flip the piece so he won't notice.Â
you eat the second to the last sushi. you know heâs looking at the very last one on your plate like the greedy man he is. you drink your water to hide your grin.Â
like clockwork, he grabs the last sushi and shoots it in his mouth in record time, a smug look on his face just a split second before realizing his mistake.
gotcha, idiot.Â
you swallow your water so fast so you wonât choke from laughter at seeing how red his neck and ears are getting.
he rushes for the water and starts cursing at you. itâs your turn to take an embarrassing photo of him. youâre quick this time.Â
âyou are evil!â he shouts, eyes a bit teary and lips red.
âif it isnât the consequences of your own actions.â
minho continues downing liquid and you canât help but stare. if it really isnât the consequences of oneâs actions.
his neck is all red and his lips are burning with the perfect shade of red adorning them. heâs swallowing the water and you follow the liquid that disappears past his lips and down his throat. he has such a pretty throat. you donât understand how a person's adamâs apple can look so defined and delicious? you snap out of your staring and tell him you should head out soon for the groceries.
he nods, still glaring at you. you can tell from his faint smile heâs trying to contain that heâs not really mad.
the train to the supermarket is a bit packed. itâs the rush hour so you and minho are sitting together, both your thighs squished next to each other.
you notice minhoâs ears are still red. no way heâs still affected by the wasabi? his eyes are closed and his jaw is clenched. you laugh.
âyour ears are still red? that wasabi really did one on you!âÂ
minho rolls his eyes. itâs not the wasabi. not that you should know when youâre laughing like that anyway.
you sneakily bring out your phone but he hears the little clanging of the metals and he catches you sending the photo of him in the restaurant to han jisung of all people.
he snatches your phone from your hold to try and stop you, but it was already sent so you donât make the extra effort to get it back. you grin in success and close your eyes while waiting for your stop.
you remember the first time you saw him. it was on this train on the way to university. you decided to leave early after having one of those moments of wanting to turn your life around at 3 am.Â
you got aboard the 6 am train and there he was, some cute guy with glasses on and a hoodie. he had earphones on and his eyes were closed as he silently tapped his foot to whatever music he was playing. you couldnât look away. not that you wanted to.
he had an intimidating aura to him which contrasted his cute face. you were a sucker for that so you decided to wake up early the next day too. maybe youâll see him again.
and yet again, there he was.Â
you woke up earlier again the next day. and the next. and then the next, until you formed a new habit of waking up early for the 6 am train even though your classes start at noon.Â
you told yourself it was a good habit to form. you felt gratitude for the pretty boy on the train. you never approached him though. you didn't feel the need to. he never looked your way and you didnât mind. it helped you develop a routine of waking up early and you were glad just for that.Â
the speakers announce your stop and minho taps you gently upon noticing your eyes were closed. both of you got out of the train and walked towards the supermarket.
grocery shopping with you was one of minhoâs favorite occurrences.
he didnât think much of it, he just knew it was so much more fun when heâs with you. he always chalked it up to you simply being fun to hang out with and that youâre always able to match his sillier side. almost a little too well. maybe..
âya! donât buy too much of that!â he notices you stuffing your cart with 5 packages of the carbonara buldak which interrupted his wandering thoughts.
âitâs my money? itâs the perfect meal for exams!â
minho recalls your late night snacking during last termâs finals and he sighs at the memory.Â
you were literally consuming that stuff three times a day. sometimes more. he had to hide the rest of it and force you to let him cook you a proper meal.
of course he almost folded when you looked at him with teary eyes, begging him to free the packs, and that you were tired and stressed and youâre really craving it. you were so tempting begging him like that. nevermind that itâs for some stupid noodles. he eventually made sure you ate his cooking anyway.
he takes 3 of the packages from your cart and puts them back on the shelf. he sighs through his nose while you glare at him.
âweâre supposed to die a natural death, y/n. i donât want you getting a heart disease any time before 90!â he scolds you.
90 is a bit too much, you think. you just poke your tongue out at him again but you move on with only the 2 packs.Â
you are so annoying. he can't help but smile while watching you struggle pushing the cart.Â
you look back at minho from his sudden quietness. minho just nods at you to continue walking. his heart warms. you always glance back to see if heâs still behind you. always. whether youâre on a narrow sidewalk or whether youâre ordering in line in front of him, or when youâre both in bed and you canât sleep due to stress, or that one time you were cheating off of him during an exam. he smiles at the thought. for all kinds of reasons, you always glance back, and for all kinds of reasons he vows to himself to keep being there.Â
both of you walk to the candy section. none of you really like candy that much but hyunjin kept begging minho to get a brand of gummies that can only be found at that supermarket. minho saw you looking at the cherry lollipops. youâve had that before. he knows because itâs what you had in your mouth during a small get-together for his birthday where he introduced you for the first time to his friends.
some of the boys have already met you. you got comfortable real quick with the rest of them and he remembers being so happy that theyâre getting along greatly with you.Â
seungmin teased him about you that night and he just threatened to put him in the oven before muttering something about how she's just a friend. seungmin just leaves him alone with a sarcastic âsureâ.Â
he recalls changbin being late that night because of a project. everyone was already on their 4th or 5th game of the night. hyunjin bought a bunch of candy and the lollipop was one of the prizes. minho remembers scolding him for being so childish but he didnât really stop him since he knows how childish all his friends are anyway.Â
you were definitely childish too with two cherry lollipops poking through each of your cheeks. why the hell do you have two? you donât even like cherries.
apart from definitely childish, you were also definitely drunk from the drinking games you were playing with the rest of the guys. you were getting too close to felix for his own liking and he was unknowingly glaring holes at the younger boyâs freckles, hoping theyâll burst or something.Â
he knows youâre a clingy drunk and he wanted to intervene, but he realized seungmin was looking at him looking at you and heâd rather not ignite whatever dumb things the mutt is thinking. he remembers cursing felix inwardly, repeating get your own friend, get your own friend in his head.
when changbin arrived, he introduced you once more. you sat up immediately to bow at the blonde man politely.
and with you being drunk as hell, you blinked at his friend a few times before your jaw dropped, both the cherry lollipops that were just in your mouth falling on top of minhoâs head. hyunjin doubled back in laughter and jeongin had to hold the back of the hyunjinâs head to keep it from smashing against the furniture. minho picked up the cherry lollipops in disgust and saw you look at changbin all dazed and pathetic with a âyouâre really handsomeâ slipping past your cherry-stained tongue. changbin laughed shyly and the guys just lost their shit even more at the whole thing.
minho knew you were way out of it at that point and decided to get you to bed while the rest of them continued with the night.Â
he dragged you to the bathroom, brushing your teeth for you since you were too drunk to do it yourself.
he got you to his bed, lifting you up and rolling you in his duvet like a cat being put on sock timeout.
âdonât argue. youâre gonna have a terrible headache in the morning. sleep. now.â he said a bit grumpily while making sure youâre still comfortable even after restraining you with his sheets. you whined at him, still not wanting the fun to end.
âbut i was winning! you- ch- chan was about to take another shot!â you were putting up a fight although he could see how weak and tired you already were. minho just clicked his tongue at you.Â
âand youâve had too much. youâre sleeping now. iâm not hearing it.â
minho closed his bedroom door shut after turning the lights out and he was right about putting you to bed since you passed out almost immediately.
after a few hours of messing around, minho got tired and left some of the guys in his living room who still had way too much energy.Â
jeongin was already asleep on the couch, chan was in the bathroom puking his head out on the toilet (the photos haunted him the next day), and the rest of his friends were so loud screaming âdraw 2!â âdraw 4!â âdraw 8!â that he got a complaint the next morning.Â
changbin followed him that night to ask about you.
âso thatâs y/nâ, changbin said in an amused tone while handing the birthday boy his gift.
âmhmâ, minho took the gift and smiled at him. âglad you could come. thanks for this.â
âis⌠she dating anyone?â the younger one asked and minhoâs heart sank so low on his stomach that he thought he was gonna have to pull chan from the toilet so he could have a go next.
changbin looked at him expectantly and minho just blinked before deciding to pull something from his ass.
âsheâs not. but she doesnât really want to date anyone right now. says theyâre a distraction. so you probably shouldnâtâ
he wasnât completely lying. you told him you didnât wanna date around, that you werenât actively seeking for it. but if anyone nice came, preferably someone you can trust and not a total stranger, then why not?Â
minho gulped and changbin looked at him weirdly but ultimately just nodded his head in understanding.
âah⌠i see. itâs too bad. but i respect that. iâm gonna hang with those idiots for a while. you heading to bed now?â minho nodded. he walked to his room with a heavy feeling on his chest that he blamed on the food.
he forgot all about it when he saw you. he chuckled at your position: head falling off the edge of the bed, arms in a marty mcfly sleeping position, legs somehow on top of his headboard? he took his phone out to immortalize the sight. how the hell did you even get out of the roll?
he sighed and gently laid your head back on the bed. he maneuvered your body until he had enough space to sleep next to you. he knew there was a high chance that you would be kicking some part of him later on but he never minded.Â
minho plopped his heavy leg over you and took you in an embrace to keep you still.
he started feeling a bit guilty for making shit up to changbin. but he figured you wonât mind. not that he would ever tell you.Â
he never thought about any of his friends seeing you in a romantic light. nor did he think about it himself. all he knew was heâs really possessive over his friends and that should extend to you.Â
but he also knew changbin was a good guy and youâd definitely click well with him. that didnât mean it would sit right in his stomach if you did click too well.Â
get your own friend, he kept thinking. youâre his friend. he doesnât want you spending less time with him. it would be unfair since he found you first. he should be enough. he huffed one last time before hugging you even tighter that night than he ever had.
âyo! you said youâd buy me two extra cups of pudding. letâs check the aisle.â minho snaps back to reality and follows you.Â
the pudding.
normally, he wouldnât even consider replacing it with one yet he offered you two.
his guilt from⌠earlier events made him think you deserve just as much and then some. he knows you know that it's unlike him to even pay you back for his greedy schemes so you're taking advantage of the newfound generosity that you didn't know was actually guilt.
somehow theyâre all out of the regular pudding. whatâs there is rows and rows of the nasty strawberry pudding both of you tried once. he remembers how your face scrunched from disgust.
the cute little designs on the pudding cup made minho wanna try it with you. you ate at the same time and both of you immediately spat it out.
âthis is absolute shit from a butt! the goddamn devilâs butt, blergh!â you drank minhoâs sparkling water to wash out the definitely-not-strawberry strawberry flavor.Â
âyeah, youâd knowâ he laughs hard and calls you weird.
âitâs an expression, you piece of shit. a piece of shit from the devilâs butt too, mind you. and youâre weirder than me, donât give me that.��
âiâll stuff this pudding in your mouth,â he threatens and you fake gag at him. none of you tried any strawberry-flavored pudding again.
âlooks like you really just donât deserve pudding todayâ he chuckles at the sight in front of him.Â
âmaybe if you left my pudding aloneâ, you mutter and he just basks in successfully annoying you.
you both continue on your separate shopping carts while still walking around together. minho is about to go crazy. why the hell does he keep being reminded of you in this stupid store? for every little thing too. like, seriously?
the meat section reminded him of you absolutely fucking up the steak you tried cooking for him when he won with his team on a dancing competition. you still ate it all, trying your best to chew the overcooked meat, not wanting to waste it.Â
the fruits and vegetables section reminded him of the time both of you were fixated on mango smoothies for months.
the onions reminded him of that one time he taught you how to cook kimchi sundubu-jjigae, and when you offered chopping the onions, you were silently sniffling to hide your crying. he laughed like a madman when he noticed. that picture was marked favorite in his phone.
the damn spring roll wrappers reminded him of your thin shorts just this afternoon. spring roll wrappers, for fuckâs sake.
the frozen foods aisle reminded him of the time he scolded you for not bringing out the tonkatsu he told you to bring out so you both could have dinner. you ended up sleeping all day in his bathtub and they were still frozen by the time he got home. you felt so bad that you paid for both of your food that night, which then made him feel bad so he went with you to the convenience store to try out the interesting strawberry pudding with the cute packaging.Â
the dairy section took him back to that one afternoon where you were both here doing your groceries, and an old couple asked him to reach for the milk brand at the bottom shelf, saying something about bad joints. he remembers the goosebumps that ran through his body when the old lady whispered to him that both of you will have beautiful kids like them someday. she proceeded to show him said kids on her wallet, pictures faded from how long ago those were probably taken. he just smiled politely at her. he was certain if you two had kids, yours would be cuter than theirs. not that he kept thinking about it from time to time afterwards.
he exhales in relief when you two get out of the supermarket, light bags of food in hand. you look at him and he looks at you and thereâs a pause before he starts talking.
âletâs pass by the convenience store. maybe they have your pudding there.âÂ
you know the convenience store is a bit farther from the station since itâs the other way. youâre not even craving pudding anymore.
âletâs goâ, you say as you both walk towards the other direction, groceries in hand.Â
you always linger when youâre with him. a few hours more to see him laugh with and at his friends on his birthday even though you already feel your eyes getting heavy. a few seats more distanced from the train door to see him a bit longer, not wanting to leave before him. a few blocks more in the opposite direction just to be in his presence a little more. the weight of the grocery bags are nothing. not when minhoâs next to you.
once you arrive, both of you plop the bags on the tiny table while he checks on the pudding aisle. you notice how peaceful it is like this with your tiny routines you formed with him over a few years. your heart beats faster, realizing the domesticity of it all.Â
you pinch your thigh to stop daydreaming about your friend. you tell yourself to just pay attention to your surroundings.Â
the cashier is giggling at someone on the phone, thereâs a cat meowing for something outside, the convenience store is rather empty, and you can hear minho clicking his tongue from across the store.
ânothing?â you ask and he nods.
âyou know, there should be compounded interest in these things. i say one more extra pudding with every day that passes where you still haven't paid me backâ, you offer a very bad deal for him. you continue pushing your luck. âbesides, that was the last pudding. i was looking forward to eating it after a hard day at uniâŚâ
minho raises his eyebrow at you.
âyouâre a spoiled brat, you know that?â he chuckles.
âand youâre a thief! iâm just sayingâŚâ you add, still trying to convince him.
minho just shakes his head and gets some sparkling water for himself. you follow him to the counter and the cashier brings his phone down to scan his item.
âis that all?â he chews his gum with a smile while taking minho's money. minho nods.Â
youâre looking at the other products near the counter. you notice the magnetic cat keyrings on the side and eye them closely. itâs a little too expensive. maybe you can convince minho to get this instead of the pudding.
âyou need condoms too?â the cashier blurts out too casually and you can't help but get flustered at the implication.
âw-we donât. weâre not- he-â
âiâll take a pack. thank youâ, minho says also too casually and you avoid looking at him while you head back to the table with both your groceries.Â
itâs none of your business, really. you knew minho liked to fuck. well, most people your age do, itâs no big deal. there are multiple times when you wanna come over to his place but heâll text you a little âbusyâ so you knew not to come.Â
there was actually a time when you just strutted in his place without informing him, much like he is with you. it ended when you realized that of course he had a whole life that didnât include you.
you were in his new apartment, relaxing in his bathroom since he could now afford an apartment with a bathtub. you were taking a warm bath, almost dozing off when you heard the door open and slam shut which was immediately followed by wet kisses and people bumping into furniture.Â
you heard them giggling as they went inside minhoâs room. you swore you felt your heart melting into the warm water and down the drain that you started to open after figuring out what was going on. and yet you can feel the familiar warmth in your belly because of the same, familiar person.
stupid lee minho with his stupidly soft voice.Â
you moved as quietly as possible to get out of the tub but youâre sure they wouldnât hear you anyway from all the moaning thatâs going on. minho sounded a bit mean to the guy but that embarrassingly turned you on too. you felt like a creep squeezing your thighs in his bathroom after a few minutes of minho groaning and telling the stranger how much of a good pet heâs being for him.Â
from then on you always told him every time youâre coming over. he doesnât do the same to you, very much loving going in and out of your place like he pays for it.Â
he knew you never brought anyone over anyway. minho teased you for your lack of love or âlust interestsâ, as he called it. that earned him a flying boba ball hurling from your straw and straight towards his cheek. your âlust lifeâ isnât his concern anyway. and itâs the same with him. minho liked to fuck and itâs not any of your business.
he stuffs the condoms and sparkling water in his bag of groceries.Â
âletâs goâ, he says while blinking at you. you head out and walk back again towards the train station. Â
the wind was cool on his skin. you are right beside him, the air making your hair flutter as you talk about jisung calling you earlier this morning about some prank he pulled on changbin that minho hasnât even heard of yet.Â
you and jisung have already gotten closer since you two met on his birthday. and since then, minho kept appearing in your apartment more often so his title wonât be replaced.
he wanted to listen to your story. he really did. especially when it concerned his friends being absolute idiots. but all he heard was âjisungieâ, âpinkâ, âbuttâ, and âburstâ while the rest of your words were getting carried away by the cool wind.
he nods at every word with a smile, trying to focus as much as he can. but seriously, how can he when the light from the streetlamp is making your features soft and all perfect for him to stare at, and when youâre letting out airy giggles that interrupts the story itself.
he laughs at that. you clutch your stomach, as if his laugh pushed yours to intensify tenfold. you don't have to know heâs laughing at you and not whatever jisung did to make poor changbin suffer.Â
you calm down after a few minutes and sit at a nearby bench with a sigh and a faint smile adorning your face.
âi canât breathe. letâs sit for a whileâ, you say, eyes closed.Â
your eyelashes are kissing your face and he has never wanted to imitate something so bad. at this point he doesnât care where his thoughts wander to. he doesnât think deeply about the implications. not when he can look at you right now.
a few silent seconds and then you jerk your head to the bushes on the right. he looks at you confused. a faint meow can be heard and you all but melt when you see a tiny kitten hiding but seemingly wanting attention.Â
he holds in a deep breath as you call for the cautious little stray in front of you. he gives you a packet of the cat treat he always brings, and you gently coo at it so as to not scare the poor thing away.
âitâs okay, baby. you have to eatâ, you say as you kneel in front of the little guy. he smiles at that.
he told you before that cats would feel less threatened if you make yourself smaller in front of them. you always listen so well. he realizes how both of your little habits, like feeding stray cats or doing groceries, have seemed to intertwine with one another over time.
youâre talking so sweetly to the cat and it overwhelms him. if he exhaled, he thinks he wouldnât be able to stop himself from yelling or something.
the kitten comes closer, suspicious of the stranger offering him the food. he takes a sniff, youâre as still as possible, and it eventually licks the treat. you beam. your eyes turn to crescents and itâs the most overwhelming thing ever that he ends up finally exhaling but not before clenching his jaw so hard so he wonât be able to startle you or the kitten.
you start petting it and the little fellow allows him. he knows itâs the greatest honor in life for you. much like when soonie finally sat on your lap. eventually, he collects himself and the little stray allows him to pet it too.
âwish i could put every stray cat in my bag and take it homeâ, he says as the kitten starts purring like an engine.
âiâll bring my bag too so we have space for more.â
minho smiles at your statement. the little guy keeps purring as minho rubs just under his ear.Â
to his shock, this one suddenly jumps on your shoulders and nestles itself on top of your head. you go completely still, afraid that if you move it will jump back down.Â
minho inhales so deep. he starts thinking youâll make him break breath-holding records someday.Â
he grabs your phone that he still somehow has, trying not to make the array of keychains jangle. you laugh at his attempts to not startle the kitten with your dangling keyrings. he takes hold of your phone and takes the picture.
you look at him, still smiling, and the little guy starts making biscuits on your head. minho keeps holding his breath. you try very hard to stay really still despite feeling the ball of fur tickling your scalp. youâre trying so hard not to laugh and squirm at the kittenâs massages and minho canât help but sigh out all the air heâs been holding.
âmarry me.âÂ
the words are out before he knows it. it takes him a second to realize what it meant. he looks at you and itâs so silent. youâve gotten completely still and youâre no longer smiling as the kitten makes biscuits on your head. he can hear his heart beating too loud. he fucked up.Â
he fucked up. stupid stupid stupid. the kitten jumps from your head and runs to a distant meowing sound, probably its mother, and youâre still completely unmoving. youâre blinking at him, an unreadable expression on your face.
he takes your grocery bags and puts them in your hands.
âi- i gotta go. text me when you get homeâ, he mutters, still not looking at you.
when you move on from the shock, minho was already across the street and heading inside the train station hurriedly.
what the fuck?
you get up, still confused, and you try running to get on the train heâs in. it shuts before you can, and youâre standing there on the platform, confused and worried.
the ride back home is too loud for minho. loud and fucking heavy. minho was never good with confrontations. he was never really good at expressing what he felt either.Â
marry him? what the fuck? he never paused to really think about the possible feelings he might have towards you yet the words slipped out of his mouth anyway. it slipped out faster than he realized that he might actually like you. and when he did realize, it was immediately after saying those stupid words which was why he started panicking instead of the obvious choice of laughing it off.
but he fucked up and fucked up again when he left you there. minho groans, bags heavy in his lap, and the ride home felt longer than usual.
he remembers this is where he met you, right on this train on the way to university. it was a normal day, he was on the 6 am train and you were outside rushing to get on board with a âpleasepleasepleaseâ leaving your mouth.Â
by your luck, or his, you made it inside and sigh in relief.Â
minho noticed your damp hair, baggy hoodie, and ridiculous-looking pants with too many pockets.Â
you were still breathing heavily and you're holding onto one of the poles. when you looked up, your eyes directly met his.Â
he blinked at you before deciding to pat the empty seat next to him. by definitely his luck, you sat there even though there were other free seats.
âthank youâ, you mumbled out shyly, avoiding his gaze. he just hummed. you made no advances to talk to him after that which made him a bit disappointed.
when he noticed you bringing out your phone to check your emails, he inwardly thanked the also ridiculous-looking keychains hanging on your phone case.
âisnât that heavy?â he asked with a teasing tone.
you looked at the voice who just spoke to you and he couldnât help but smile wider at the shudder laced in your words.
âw-what?âÂ
âyour keychains.â
âoh, theseâ, you mumble and he nods. âthey donât feel heavy to me. actually, they feel too light for my liking? i want more. some of them i bought, some are given. itâs like a collecting-thing.â
he softly laughed at your rambling that you didnât seem to notice.
âcan i see?â
you handed him your phone and your hand brushed against his. your soft hands. he inspected the thing and gave you back your phone, making sure to brush his fingers past your hand again.Â
âi have one in my backpack. would you want one?â minho offered.
âr-really?âÂ
minho laughed at your nervous state. why were you so nervous?Â
âyeah. itâs probably buried in here though so iâm not sure if i can get it right now. i can give it to you some other time, maybe?â
âyou donât have to bother, really.â
âno. itâs cute. the keychains. it would be an honor.â minho said.
âi um.. iâm al- a student in the university at the next stop. i-â
âgreat! me too. iâll look for it there.â
when you two got to the university, minho dug through his backpack for one of the keytags in there. he found it under layers of crumpled paper, then noticed his jureumi doodle on it. he handed it to you with a smile and you gladly took it.
âthis is quite⌠interesting. you drew this?â you asked.
âyeah. i- yeah.â
you laughed and immediately stuck it on one of the other keyrings on your phone.
âthere! i will make sure to take care of itâ, you said, bowing at him in gratitude.Â
âwell, i gotta make sure that you make sure to take care of it. what timeâs your break?â
the rest was history. the train beeps and announces his stop so he gets up and leaves.Â
itâs been four days and he hasnât seen you since. you messaged him that night telling him you got home to which he sighed in relief but he didnât reply back, feeling too awkward to do so.Â
he didnât come over to your place either. he canât face you after that.Â
he supposes youâd either a) tease him about it and he can finally say it was a joke but youâll both know about how he feels anyway which will drive you away; or b) act normal and pretend it never happened and he can be relieved but youâll both know about how he feels anyway and he wouldnât be able to stand ignoring it.Â
you actually went with option b, he thinks. he knew you werenât good at confrontation either. you messaged him the next day if you could come over like usual but he replied with âbusyâ so you donât push.Â
you tried again the next day, then the next, but he kept saying the same thing. you still asked earlier this morning, the fourth time now, and he was about to reply the same four letters until his phone came flying across the couch thanks to kim seungmin.
âdo you wanna get sma-â
âi canât stand itâ, the boy interrupts.
minho still looks at him angrily and a bit confused.
âi really canât stand it. you asked to hang out but i can tell youâre angry at something and youâve been passive-aggressive the whole timeâ, seungmin finally breathes out.
âfirst of all, i asked jisung first but he said he was busy-âÂ
âthere you go again. whatâs wrong, minho?â seungmin interrupts again.
minho just sighs. heâs feeling a bit guilty now. seungmin always meant well. maybe thatâs why he called him next. even if he sucked at confrontation, seungmin read people well and maybe he just needed someone to understand without him having to say it out loud. minho didnât realize that and apparently, the younger man was already fed up.
âitâs y/n, isnât it?â seungmin asked. minho closes his eyes. he really is too observant.
âjisung told me that she told him you have been ignoring herâ oh nevermind. so jisung told him. minho sighs, not sure if he should say the words out loud.
âi⌠i think i love her.â
âyou think?âÂ
seungmin is just baffled. he laughs at his friendâs stupidity and lack of awareness of his own emotions.Â
minho groans.
âso why are you ignoring her?â seungmin sat more comfortably, although a bit far from the older boy, just in case he says something that would make minho wanna smack him with a pillow.
âi told her i wanted to marry herâ, minho says quietly and seungmin canât hold himself back from laughing but minho continues. âitâs so fucking stupid. i told her that and then i realized that maybe i liked her. i just stood there like an idiot then i left.â
it felt good to get the words out, he realizes. seungmin is still laughing with a hand clutching his stomach. minho throws a pillow at him and the younger boy calms down.
âyouâre cute, minho. but you still didnât answer my question. why are you ignoring her now?"
âdidnât i just tell you?â
âno?â seungmin interjects. âdid she reject your ridiculous marriage proposal?âÂ
âi just told you i left.â
âand there it is. you had no right to leave! you werenât the one to say yes!â seungmin shakes his head, still smiling.
minho never considered that maybe you liked him back. he just⌠never did.Â
he recalls back to that time he met you on the train. from the first time he laid eyes on you, you piqued his curiosity. from your wet hair to your oversized pants with too much pockets to the keychains on your phone, he really wanted to get to know you better. when you told him you were free until your 12 noon class, that also spiked his interest because why the hell were you rushing to get on the 6 am train when your classes start six hours later?Â
your childlike wonder made him immediately want to be your friend. he didnât question it since his close friends are a bunch of grown men with the interests and loudness of children anyway. not that he's any different.Â
so you two became friends. best friends over the span of two years. he was too afraid that two years is all heâd ever have with you so he didnât consider that maybe, just maybe, that there's a chance kim seungmin is right.
he was about to speak up again before hearing his doorbell ring.Â
âi got itâ, seungmin says.Â
instead of the pizza they were expecting, you were standing there, hair damp, and in pants with too much zippers this time.Â
minhoâs heart skips a beat.Â
you look at seungmin then look at minho then look back at the guy in front of you.Â
âi- iâm sorry-â
âno. itâs alright, y/n. i was just about to leaveâ, seungmin reassures you.Â
seungmin goes back to the living room to gather his things that were scattered like he was definitely not about to leave.Â
minho stays silent, finally picking up his phone from across the couch and he opens it to the unsent message on his screen.
seungmin gives you a goodbye and a quick hug, and minho grimaces at the action. since when did seungmin hug his friends? the door shuts and youâre heading towards him.Â
heâs still. he canât ignore you forever but he thinks he canât face you too soon.
âlook at me. iâm right in front of you and youâre still ignoring me?â you pout and minho finally looks up at you, your damp hair sticking to his shirt that youâre wearing.
youâre wearing his shirt. you really went with option b after all.
âyou suck at proposals, you know?â you throw something on his lap and his eyes go to the familiar cat keychain that he saw you look at in the convenience store. âasking me to marry you and you didnât even get me a ring.. tsk.â
your words barely sink in and his heart is still beating in a speed like never before. he looks up at you again and there you are, smiling down at him like you also feel the same.
âyou-â
âyes, dumbass. i accept your horrible marriage proposal.â youâre grinning from ear to ear as you finally sit down on the couch next to him. you bring out your phone and show him the dangling other half of the magnetic keychain, attached to the jureumi keytag he gave you two years ago.
minho laughs. you accepted. you accepted the proposal that wasnât really a proposal but more like a confession. you accepted it. you accepted him. he smiles wider at the ridiculousness of the moment.
âand i suppose these are the rings?â minho teases.
âmhm! want me to put it on your finger?âÂ
he laughs at that but nods. you insert the wide ring of the keychain on his finger and he giggles at the empty space.
âya, you didnât even get my ring size right!â he teases, eyes sparkling and heart practically bursting. he thinks heâs never been this happy.
âyou really shouldnât complainâ, you retort back with a smile. âi mean, really, you proposed while iâm the one kneeling down, without rings, and then left! youâre hopeless, lee minho. at least i got us somethingâ
minho grins while shaking his head.
âiâm sorry for leaving, y/nâ, he takes your hand and kisses your fingers one by one.Â
goosebumps run all over your body while his soft lips grace your skin. âin my defense, i didnât know iâd be proposing.â
minho stops kissing your hand, taking your ring finger and inserting it into the empty space in the keychain right next to his.
âthere. it fits perfectly.â
he looks at you, almost too fond, and you arenât smiling anymore. youâre looking at him like youâre about to cry.
âyou are so sappy. iâm in love with you, you know?â you whisper like it's a secret you are never meant to tell. minho looks at you and notices how glassy your eyes have become.
âshh. itâs okay.âÂ
he tucks a hair strand behind your ear. âiâm in love with you too. good for us, honestly. wouldnât want us to marry when we donât love each other.â
heâs sure your soft laughter is better than any music ever heard in this world.
âcan i hug you?â you ask him shyly.Â
the butterflies in his stomach are going crazy at that point but he lets out a chuckle at your question. he doesnât quite understand how youâre still able to get so shy with him after all this time.
âyou donât have to ask.â
âi know, but just to be su-â minho interrupts you, removing the keychain from your fingers and quickly maneuvering you on top of his lap. you squeak and he encages you in a tight embrace.
you wrap your arms around his shoulders in return and you just about melt into his hug.
âyou smell so goodâ, minho mutters while burying his nose into your neck.Â
your previously damp hair that is now dry made him aware of your fresh-out-of-the-shower scent, and he inhales you in so deep, wanting to stay there forever. he canât help but press a lingering kiss on your neck.
you whimper at the unexpected kiss. minho smiles at your reaction and peppers a few more kisses. you being so close to him is much better than smelling your scent in your bathroom. his lips continue kissing and he feels you let go of the hug, deciding to grip onto the material of his hoodie instead.
âminhoâ, you sigh, trying to even your breathing.Â
âmm? whatâs the matter?â he gets lost in your scent and decides that him inhaling isnât enough. he licks the skin and groans at the shiver that runs through your whole body. âyouâre so sensitive..â
he can feel you gripping the fabric tighter. he chuckles right next to your ear and that simple thing makes you shiver again which further amuses him.
minho licks another spot and he was about to suck on it, but someone rings the doorbell. he ignores it with a huff and proceeds to suck on the area. you let out a tiny moan and he smiles, sucking on it a bit harder.Â
to both of your dismay, the doorbell rings again and minho gathers all his self-restraint to remove himself from you.Â
he kisses your neck one last time before removing you from his lap. the grumpy look on his face is evident as he gets up to see what was so important that he was interrupted from marking you.
apparently it was the pizza that seungmin ordered. he thanked the delivery guy with a tip, and placed the food on the table.
youâre focused, putting the other half of the magnetic keychain on his phone case. he feels his heart melting.
âseungminnie ordered this with his money. i suppose we can enjoy this.â he grins at the mention of eating seungminâs food and you just nod while blinking at him slowly with a blank expression. âor maybe we can eat this later.â
minho hovers over your figure and encages you on the couch. youâre just looking at him, smiling like a fool with dazed eyes.Â
âyou wanna continue, pretty girl?â minho asks in that sickeningly sweet tone. you couldâve sworn that there was concern laced in his voice if his hand wasnât rubbing your thigh firmly which definitely overwhelmed you some more.
âmin, i..â you start speaking but the rest of your sentence dies in your throat as you look at his hand inching higher.Â
âmm?â he smiles down at you, noticing your hands digging into his couch. âdonât worry, baby. iâll take care of you. will you let me?â
you nod at him. minho smiles.Â
âbut i⌠iâm not sure-â
âif youâre not ready right now, itâs okay. we can just eat-â
âno!â you interrupt him quickly. âitâs okay. i mean, i want it. now. i just- iâm not sure if i can be good? i donât know what to do.â
minhoâs heart skips a beat at your words. youâre just too cute. how can you ever think you wonât be good? youâre already being so good right now.
âshh. itâs okay. youâre already perfect. i said iâll take care of you, yeah?â minho kisses your forehead and you know for sure that everything his lips touch makes you a bit dizzy.
âsorry. iâm acting like i donât know shit. but like, practically, i donât? iâm not a virgin but i- i uh iâve only slept with one person so far.â
he giggles at your nervous rambling. youâre too adorable.
âyeah. you mentioned that before. itâs okay, pretty. donât be nervous. itâs just me.â
âi didnât tell you it was with aâŚÂ woman. the person i lost it to. so i, um, i donât know how to handle stuff with a guy.â you confess.
minhoâs cock twitches at the confession. not a single guy. heâs the first man youâll ever have. you notice his jaw clench and he squeezes your thigh.
âyou still want me?â minho asks, hoping for the obvious answer.
âwant you now.â
minho nods and finally kisses you on the lips.Â
your lips are so soft against his. itâs so soft and perfect and somehow familiar.Â
heâs kissing you like itâs something heâs been practicing for his whole life. he lifts you from the couch, carrying you in his arms. your lips are slotted against each other. he licks over it and you let a moan escape making his tongue slip inside.
your mouth is so fucking perfect. so wet and so warm. his cock envies his tongue at the moment and he hurriedly opens the door to his bedroom.Â
he lays you down on the bed and you let out a little stretch. he laughs at your cuteness.
âtake it off.â you point at his clothes. he has such a smug look on his face. this canât be happening. no, this really is.Â
he removes his shirt and lays on top of you.Â
heâs so beautiful like this. you trace your fingers on his skin, mouth agape at your crazy hot best friend, looking down at you with a smile. you trace the scar on his abdomen that somehow makes him prettier. minho laughs at your actions.
he takes your wandering hands and pins them right beside you. he kisses you again in the same breath, harder, messier, more forceful as if he wants to consume you whole. you whine into the kiss and he all but swallows your noises, licking and biting and sucking all over your mouth.Â
when minhoâs hands let go of your pinned arms, you scramble to hold onto his shoulders. he kisses down your neck, hands touching everywhere and eventually bunching up the fabric of his shirt youâre wearing, up and over your head.Â
âshit.â
his mouth kisses all the way down to your collarbones, then to your shoulders, and he pulls one of the straps down, kissing the spot where the bra strap was.Â
âminho, need you already.â you desperately sigh while tugging at his hair. he kept kissing all over your shoulders and down your chest, before pulling down the cups and letting your breasts spill out. his jaw clenches. even better than he thought.
âi know, baby. but let me take my time, yeah?â he says sweetly with a furrow in his brows before groping one of your tits and licking your nipple. he feels you whine and shudder at the sensation. âfuck.â
he keeps his hands full of them, continuing to lick and suck while humming in content.Â
at that point you can no longer help but squeeze and scratch his shoulders.
minho lets go of your nipple and grins.
âkitty likes to scratch? is this too much?â he says with fake concern in his voice while he pinches the hardened bud. your eyes close, hands gripping him tighter because of how sensitive heâs making you
âi asked you a question, baby. look at me when i ask you a question.â he brings himself back up to look at your cute face all scrunched up, his hand stroking your cheek with his thumb. this is too much. how can he be demanding yet fucking soft about it?
you open your eyes, brows furrowed in frustration.
âthere we go. now answer. is this too much?â he goes back to your chest again, slowly this time, dragging his finger downwards. when he reaches your breast, he encircles your nipple and rubs it lightly, his feather-light touch making you tremble.Â
âyesâ, you whined. âminho-â
he suddenly pinches hard and rolls it in between his fingers. you moan out loud and he chuckles, admiring how much of a mess heâs already made of you.
he unclasps your bra and dives his tongue into your mouth again while his fingers pull down the zipper on your pants. he tugs it off but is met with resistance. confused, he breaks away from the kiss and sees that it was the wrong zipper. you giggle after realizing what happened.
âyou and your weird pants.â he zips down the proper zipper this time, and pulls it down along with your underwear.Â
your jumpy thighs immediately close at the cool air in his room but he spreads them wide for him, negating your attempts.
âshit, youâre made for me.â he runs a finger through your folds, gathering the slick that formed and spreading it all over your cunt. âso wet, baby. knew youâd leak for me just right.â
you bite your lip, muffling your sounds when his fingers come into contact with your pussy. he takes a thumb to your clit and rubs.Â
âmin-â
âi know, baby. itâs been so long, hasnât it?â he coos, applying more pressure. âiâll play with it for a bit. youâll let me, yeah?â
minhoâs position in between your legs kept you from your poor attempts of bringing your thighs together. he pinches your clit softly and your hips jerk even more.
âyou canât keep still, can you?â minho chuckles. âitâs okay, iâll make you.â
minho lays down, eyes right above your cunt. he spreads your pussy with two of his fingers before diving in for a taste. he groans. too fucking good. Â
your thighs enclose his head. he takes both of his arms to hold your hips down while he greedily laps at your cunt.Â
âmmhâ he mumbles onto your wetness, alternating between lingering flicks to your clit, licking down to gather more of your slick, then back above. âhold your legs, baby. be good for me, yeah?â
you listen to him, hooking your hands below your knees. youâre crying out his name and he takes it upon himself to add his fingers to the mix.Â
he slips his middle finger inside, groaning at the resistance. god, yourâe so fucking tight. his tongue starts sucking on your clit and you whine for him so cutely. he buries the whole finger in, making you gasp, and he temporarily releases you from his mouth.
âmm. there we go.â
minho is already drunk on your cunt at this point. he goes back to licking and sucking and thrusting and playing with it like he said he would.Â
he adds another finger afterwards and starts scissoring you open.Â
one specific curl of his fingers gets you moaning his name, more high-pitched than the previous ones. he chuckles directly on your pussy and does it again while simultaneously dragging his teeth across your clit.
you thrash under him, gripping under your legs harder, still following what he told you to do. so obedient.Â
minho is fucking livid. heâs messy with it. you can feel his heavy tongue and plump lips all over you. your moans are getting more frequent, your legs starting to shake.
âyou feel it baby?â minho says in between licks, his fingers continuing to abuse that one spot. you think youâre about to burst.
âmin- please. iâll-â
âcum on my tongue.â he orders and your body follows him. you cum so dizzyingly hard and minho continues dragging his hot tongue on your cunt. you let go of your thighs and push his head crying about it being too much.
he pulls off with a smile, licking his fingers that were just in you. intoxicating.
youâre breathing heavily, eyes closed from the intense orgasm and thighs practically vibrating. your hair is messy on his sheets, parts of your sucked red and purple, your pussy glistening because of him. all of it, because of him. youâre so fucking insatiable.Â
he runs his hand up your shaking thighs and you flinch at his touch. he rubs his hand on your swollen clit and you flinch harder, still sensitive.Â
âpoor baby is twitching. canât wait to be buried right here.â he drags his hand up from your cunt to your lower belly and pushes down. you squirm. after a while, you finally open your eyes and look at him.
heâs smiling wide, mouth a whole mess, even his nose was a bit wet because of you. youâd be embarrassed but heâs so fucking pretty and it turns you on even more.
ân-need a moment, min.â you say in a hushed tone, still trying to even your breathing. minho nods and lies down next to you, tucking your hair behind your ear again. how is he so soft?
âtake your time. youâre so beautiful all spread like this.â his voice is so fond. âcould stare at you all day.â
âyouâre pretty too.â you tell him with a smile, eyes traveling down his form.Â
heâs still wearing his sweatpants and you notice his dick poking through it. your curious hands travel down his stomach to the bulging outline in his pants. minho hisses and grabs your hand.
âyouâre going to drive me insane.â minho is too fucking hard and heâs trying his best to wait since you needed your moment. but the way you look in front of him, fully naked with your innocent eyes and soft hands wanting to grab his dick, he might just lose it.
âwanna see it, min. can i?â you ask.Â
youâre a goddamn angel. youâre asking permission and that somehow makes his cock twitch. he canât really resist you, not when youâre looking at him like that. and not like he wanted to anyway.Â
he sits against his headboard, motioning you to sit on his lap. he rubs your thighs gently. youâre so warm on top of him. so pretty.Â
âpull it out then.âÂ
with shaky hands, you pull down his sweatpants just enough to pull his hard cock out. he bites his lip when your soft fucking hands touch his dick. he can feel his ego inflating when you gasp and look at it with wide eyes.Â
heâs big. you havenât seen a lot of dicks but you know it's big. thicker than what youâve seen in the media, and a bit more than average in length.
âitâs..â
âhm?â
âitâs really pretty like you.âÂ
minho laughs at your statement. you have his hard cock in your soft hands and youâre calling him pretty. youâre too fucking cute.Â
you notice itâs already leaking a considerable amount. you swipe experimentally at the tip and he grips your thighs harder.
âbabyâ, he speaks in warning.
âmm?â you continue caressing his dick, admiring how his thigh muscles clench and his breathing hitches.
âdonât be a brat. you said you needed a moment.â
âbut youâre so sensitive here too?â you return the faux concern to him. you squeeze just below the tip and he moans. âwanna play with it, min. like you did with me.â
oh? youâre getting bold? minho clenches his jaw, glaring at you. he wanted you to stop before he cums too soon, but your soft and warm fucking hands felt too good on his cock. he tries to distract you.
âgrab a condom from my drawer, baby.â thankfully, you obey. you notice itâs the new condoms. who knew he really was gonna use it for you.
you open the foil, and he guides you to slip it down his cock. eventually, you start stroking him again and he whimpers.
âsee? you like it!â you say confidently while minhoâs brain starts glitching. âyouâre gonna lay there for me, wonât you?â
youâre getting cocky. and somehow itâs turning him on more. youâre on top of him acting like a big girl. he likes that. heâll put you back in place eventually.
âyeah? you wanna play?âÂ
you nod with a faint smile, still softly stroking his dick.
âweâll play on my own terms, pretty.â
he grabs your hips with rough palms and sits you right on top of his cock. both of you moan at the wetness. he grips your hips and grinds you down.Â
âminho-â you whine, gripping onto his shoulders.Â
youâre squirming again, trying to get out of his hold on. your clit is still a bit sensitive from earlier yet heâs dragging it on his wet cock like he wants it to overwhelm you. minho grunts.
âsaid you wanted to play with it. you donât like this?â minho says, his voice like honey right next to your ear.Â
heâs fucking pressing you down on it. your thighs are so fidgety but his strong hands are still holding your hips down, making you take it.
you just whimper and he laughs.
âyour moment passed, baby. iâm gonna fuck you now.â
minho swiftly pins you down under him, tapping his cock on your clit.
âshit, min-â
âyou ready, baby?â
âstill sensitive. donât know if iâll lastâ, you answer honestly. minho kisses your forehead.
âitâs alright, y/n. itâs just me.â
you nod at him and he collects your slick on his cock, hissing through his teeth. he pushes one of your legs up, his other hand slowly inching the tip in your entrance.
âfuck.â
youâre clutching the sheets. it fucking hurts. youâre both so wet against each other but his huge fucking cock felt too much.
âhurts, min.â
minho hums, stopping his movements. his tip is already in, and he starts to press soft kisses on your neck again.Â
he rubs on your clit and you twitch under him, inserting his cock in you even more slowly.Â
youâre so fucking tight. tight and wet and fucking perfect. youâre clenching so hard on him, he can barely slip inside without using his hand to guide him in. heâs breathing heavily above you, and he notices you stopped breathing altogether.
âbaby, breathe.â he caresses your thigh softly. âi know it hurts but i promise itâs gonna be good later. breathe for me. try to relax.â
his soft voice is washing over your senses. you nod as you try to follow his words. who knew taking his cock would be so fucking hard?Â
âthere you go. not used to taking big cocks, huh?â minho teases which gets you laughing airily. âi suppose youâre not used to taking cocks at all. so i should really make this good for you.â
you take a moment to try and focus on something else other than that thing penetrating you. you look at minho smiling down at you, eyes fucking sparkling like heâs waited for this his whole life. heâs really so beautiful. if you knew heâd look this pretty for you right from the start, you wouldâve approached him sooner on the train. it doesnât matter though. you have him now.
âyou can try moving again.â you softly mutter.
minho rubs on your clit a bit more firmly, and keeps whispering in your ear while situating himself inside.
âso good, baby. you have no idea.â
âyouâre clenching so much. try to relax. for me? donât wanna cum while iâm not even halfway inside you.â
âshit, feels perfect in here.â
âthere we go. shh sh, itâs alright youâre doing so well.â
âjust a few more. still hurts?â
âfeels full? i know, pretty. but just a bit more.â
he talks you through it and you swear your mind is already fuzzy by the time he bottoms out.
âyou took it all. iâm so proud of you.â he says with a kiss on your cheek. he feels your cunt clench around him at his words and he smiles.
âmin- fuck, itâs so deep.â
âi know. let me know if i can move, yeah?â minho is gripping onto the sheets. youâre so fucking snug and wet around his cock. itâs better than any fucking thing ever. he could stay buried here.Â
after a few soft kisses and involuntary clenches, you decide that youâre ready for him to move. minho pushes your leg higher, dragging himself out and slowly sliding back in with a little force.Â
âshit, minho.â
âyouâre so tight. fucking gripping me.â
minho repeats the motions, slow but hard, and soon enough youâre squeezing his arms and moaning his name. you can feel him rub against a certain spot and youâre sure youâre about to explode.
âp-please go faster.â
âyou sure?â
âyes, min. fuck- just. please.â
minho kneels and presses both of your legs to your chest. he slips his cock inside you hard and gets to a pace quicker than before. he fits so well. you start screaming from him as his dick rubs against your g-spot even better and he starts kissing your mouth again. he licks and sucks on your tongue, and lifts your hips a bit higher and angles his hips a bit differently then rams his cock into you.
âf-fuck, minho. n-not so hard.â you cry out, wincing at the pain of him nudging your cervix. itâs fucking painful. minho apologizes and pulls out, rubbing his head on your clit to get your mind off the pain.
âi wanna try something. wanna take you from behind. you alright with that?â minho says softly.
âo-okay.â you nod, and minho presses a sweet kiss to your lips before flipping you over.
he manhandles you to a position he likes, ass up, face down, spreading your legs a bit wider. youâre a dream. he taps his tip on your pussy, which gets your whining, before slipping inside and continuing his pace.
youâre squirming and moaning much more. somehow, his dick felt even better in this position. minho grabs your ass and thrusts just how he likes. youâre crying out his name.
âmmm. letting me do this to you.. you like taking big cocks, baby?â he says, gripping your bruised hips so tight like itâs his job. youâre nodding, hair messy all over his pillows.
âo-only yours.â you cry out loud. youâre already drooling but he canât see that.
âthatâs right. only mine. iâll train you to please it. train you to crave it. youâll like that, won't you?â
he angles his hips and slams into that fucking spot which gets you twitching under him.
âi asked you a question, baby. what did i tell you to do when i ask you a question?â
he gets one of his hands to pull both your arms together, tugging so your head would be lifted up. minho takes his other hand, holding your jaw firmly. you look behind you, staring at him, and he sees how fucking beautiful you are. your cheeks are stained with tears, your chin wobbling with drool over them, your eyes glassy and dazed from how good heâs fucking you.
âthatâs right. thought you forgot.â he keeps thrusting and youâre moaning so loud as if itâs the only thing youâre good for. âso? would you like that? train you to be mine?â
minho is so fucking mean.Â
you try to answer. you really do. but every time your mouth moves, he just slams into that spot that gets you moaning his name instead.
âcanât even speak?â minho laughs and decides to let go of your face. you fall back into the pillows.Â
âiâll let it slide for now since i have to make sure to fuck you good.â
he carries on with his thrusts. youâre trying so hard to prolong your orgasm, not wanting this to end. he starts groping your tits from behind you, his other hand rubbing your clit in quick motions. fuck.Â
minho is so close. your pussy is so fucking wet and the recoil of your ass from his thrusts is driving him insane. you canât control your moans and he knows youâre close as well.
âyou close, baby?â he huffs.
âyes, min. iâm- s-o close.â
âhold it.âÂ
you fucking groan. minhoâs brows are furrowed, heâs focusing on your wet fucking cunt squelching so loud from his rubbing and thrusting. your legs start to shake violently, minho slaps your ass from how fucking dirty you look and feel around him.
âmin, i canât-â
âyou can.â
âno-â
âjust a little more. youâre cumming with me.â
minho is thrusting like a mad man. his grip on you is so tight, and youâre fucking begging for him to let you cum.
âpleasepleaseplease-â
âcum.â
you jerk violently under him while moaning his name, and heâs cumming. heâs cumming so fucking hard. harder than he ever had in his life. itâs so good. so fucking addicting. heâs moaning in your ear, youâre clenching around him so hard and itâs so wet and overwhelming. he tries to pull out but youâre gripping his cock fucking tightly like youâre made to keep him there. he feels himself weaken and he slumps on top of you.Â
it takes him a few moments to regain himself, and he slowly removes himself from inside you.
you were in a faraway place. your body feels too light, but also so heavy that you canât move. you canât think either. you feel minho flipping you on your back. heâs talking so sweetly but you canât really register his words while he kisses your lips, then your nose, then your forehead, then the top of your head.
he mutters something about cleaning you both and youâre too far away to respond. itâs good. you feel fucking great. after a while, the bed dips and heâs running a warm cloth in between your thighs.Â
youâre so pretty, he thinks. like his personal angel. youâre laying their dazed, and he thinks heâs the luckiest fucking person in the world. he can see your eyes getting droopy, about to pass out from the amazing sex you both had.Â
minho dresses you both, and wraps you in his blanket.
âyouâre too cute. iâll be here when you wake up.âÂ
after a few hours, you wake up with your entire body aching. itâs usual for you since you manage to sleep in odd positions. but this time, it ached in new places. you chuckle at the memory. you sit back up and rub your eyes.
minho enters his room, glad that youâre already awake.Â
âsleep well?â
you nod. you notice heâs carrying a paper bag in his hands. minho drops it on his desk and heads to your soft form on his bed. he kisses you on the mouth and you freeze with a blush.
minho notices and laughs at you.
âi already had my tongue in you and youâre blushing at a little kiss?â he smiles widely. his words make you blush more.
âyou took me by surprise is all...â you try defending yourself. you know you wouldnât get used to your friend being so physically intimate with you any time soon. you canât help but feel all shy.
itâs minho, for fuckâs sake. your asshole friend who keeps stealing your food and taking horrible pictures of you. but thatâs exactly why.Â
itâs minho. your asshole friend whoâs too sweet and pretty and funny for his own good.
âwhatâs going through your pretty head?â minho asks, tracing his fingers on your bare thigh.. your smooth thigh he can now touch like this.
âi canât believe we skipped the marriage and went straight to the honeymoonâ you tease. he laughs with you.
âyeah we kinda suck at this. skipping the boyfriend-girlfriend phase and straight to engagement..â minho mumbles with a smile while kissing your bruised neck. âthen skipping the marriage and straight to consummation.â
you shiver while giggling at his kisses. youâre so sensitive for him. he likes that.
âwouldnât have it any other way.â you say.Â
his hands inch higher and higher on your thighs until he gets interrupted by the grumble of your stomach. both of you laugh.
âwe have all the time in the world to continue later. letâs get you fed.â minho grins, pulling you from the bed.Â
âoh andâ, minho smiles widely, giving you the paper bag. you look at the contents with a grin of success on your face. âthereâs your pudding. compounded.â
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a/n: that was a lot. stretch a bit, drink some water, wash your face. that's what i did after writing lololol. i rlly hope this wasn't too much.. ALSO i tagged ppl who were asking for a part 2. if u want to get removed pls lmk!
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tags: @stayinlimbo @all4minnie @emmaluvsjisung @ddiidi @8bigguys @sunnysidesins
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"Valentines Day is a capitalistic scam made to sell chocolate and flowers!" Eddie Munson bellowed, leaping to the top of a cafeteria table not even ten minutes into lunch.Â
"Do you think he was born like this, or just dropped on his head as a baby?" Heather asked, rolling her eyes as the super senior began waving his arms around, getting way too into his annual âanti-valentines dayâ rant.Â
Steve, who'd tuned out the dramatics in favor of trying to figure out how he could ditch school, only heard her because sheâd begun running her foot up his leg.
Directly in front of Patrick.
As if half the school didnât know he planned on asking her out after school.Â
Long over being a part of these kinds of games, Steve kicked out, forcing Heatherâs leg off his.Â
He did it harder than he intended and immediately winced, as if he hadnât meant to do it at all. Aimed a sad little look at her, softening his eyes in the way he knew ladies loved while murmuring a quiet "sorry.âÂ
A pudding cup was offered as an additional apology--which Heather, thankfully, accepted.Â
Crisis averted, Steve used the movement of handing the cup over to get his legs well out of Heather's range. He had other things to think about today, and getting drawn into whatever drama Heather was trying to brew wasnât on the list.Â
Particularly given the basketball team as a unit had started snubbing him out.Â
"Newsflash ladies! Your man isn't taking you to some shitty restaurant because he loves you, he's doing it because he hopes you'll give it to him in your car!" Munson continued, voice growing impossibly louder.Â
A crude gesture followed, involving hip thrusts and hand jabs.
 Several of the cheerleaders shot him disgusted looks as he did it.Â
"Definitely dropped on his head." Carol said, glaring at Munson as his little group of freaks and geeks cheered him. "More than once."Â
Steve hummed an agreement, more on automatic than from actually listening. He knew how to look like he was paying attention, even if his head was deep in possible escape plans.Â
If he dipped at the last minute to the bathroom on the way to fifth period, Tommy wouldn't have time to stop him and he could make a break for his carâŚ
That just left making up a plausible enough excuse as to why thee Steve Harrington, whose single status was the current hot topic of the school, left school early on Valentines Day.Â
("Candy, sex, the overwhelming affection of all the ladies." Tommy drawled out that morning, practically preening. "Valentine's Day is the best holiday man. Just look at all this!"Â Â
He waved a hand at his locker, which was absolutely covered in paper hearts.Â
"The rally squad put hearts on the lockers of everyone on the basketball team, Tommy." Carol argued, rolling her eyes. "Steveâs is practically buried in them.â
Tommy opened his mouth to respond, no doubt with something else teasing and rude, but Carolâs elbow caught him in the gut first.Â
âIf you keep acting like this you're not getting any sex." She warned.Â
"Aww baby, don't be like that. You know you're the only one for me." Tommy teased, with a wink that prompted Carol to smack him on the shoulder.
Laughing, he added: "Besides we can't fight or we'll miss our favorite game. Which poor gal thinks this year is the year Steve will take her out on a date!"
Carol allowed Tommy to put an arm over her shoulder, the two of them turning knowing grins on their friend as a singular unit.Â
Even if Steve hadnât felt like their friend in a hot minute.Â
Not in the way he used to.Â
"I do love watching them stutter through their little confessions.â Carol admitted, like this wasnât something theyâd loved doing since middle school. âI wonder if anyone will ever top Cindy Komer."Â
Steve almost wasn't fast enough to cover his wince--that particular incident had been painful for him and Cindy.Â
Steve still had no idea what he'd said to make the then-freshman cry.Â
He thought he'd been nice about turning her down, but judging by Carol constantly quoting what he'd said, Steve had a feeling he'd accidentally been an asshole again.
Not that anyone ever thought it was accidental.Â
âSteve? Hel~lo? Are you listening?â Carol said, snapping to get his attention and God did Steve hate that.
Never realized just how much until Nancy but after sheâd pointed out that Carol treated him and Tommy both like her dogs, well.Â
It was hard not to notice--and be a bit resentful.Â
âGod you keep doing this, youâre turning into such a space case.â Carol continued, the edge back in her voice. The same one sheâd been using for a while, like Steve was on her last nerve. âPlease tell me youâre not still mooning over Nancy fucking Wheeler.âÂ
âNo.â He snapped, only to know instantly that was the wrong move, and try to fix it before Carol blew up. âNo--Iâve just already had to fend someone off today. Like first thing--I was barely out of my car.â
There, that should keep Carol and Tommy both off his back for being âangryâ and it wasnât even a lie. He really had been asked out earlier, though the girl had been gracious about his rejection. Â
Of course, this kind of instant redirection came with a price--and in this case, it was being absolutely hounded for more information.Â
âOh shit who!? Was it that Buckley girl?â Carol perked up immediately, like a hunting dog scenting prey. âI swear she stares holes in your head, sheâs so weirdâŚâ ) Â
"This isn't about romance! It's about showing who has the most cash, gets the most sex! It's a pathetic social ritual you're all falling for!â Munson yelled, jolting Steve back into the present. âI bet none of you even enjoy it!âÂ
"Tell that to all the girls Steveâs dated!â One of the younger basketball guys hollered, prompting a wave of laughter from the rest of the cafeteria. âThey seem to enjoy it plenty!â
Steve couldnât see who had said it, and should have felt the normal wave of smug warmth that the team had his back. Â
Except his team had already proven they didnât.Â
Were in fact, siding more and more with Hargrove, just as Tommy was.Â
They were rapidly approaching a watershed moment. Steve could feel it, the same way heâd always been able to tell when a crowd was about to turn.
He was losing, but was still on top of Hawkins social spaces enough, had caught it early enough, that he could turn everyoneâs favor--if he wanted.Â
Emphasis on âif.âÂ
Munson spun to face his table, hair whipping to smack him in the face. The guy had clearly been trying to grow it out, but right now he looked like one of those poodles Carol's mom loved so much.Â
So said Carol, anyway.Â
"You sure about that?" Munson challenged, a crazed grin breaking across his face. "Rumor has it King Steve lost his groove ever since Wheeler dumped him!"Â
Steve grimaced, though he was secretly thankful Munson went with "dumped" instead of "cheated on" (or any of the other vile words Billy had flung around, spreading across the school in the sick, crawling way rumors moved.Â
Hargrove had been positively brutal about the whole Jonathan and Nancy thing, and the only reason he wasn't here now to spin this whole situation against Steve was because the guy always vanished at lunch.)
Tommy's face morphed into an affronted snarl, hands slapping down on the table. He turned expectantly to Steve, waiting for "The King" to get up and "handle" Munson.
Like Steve even cared about this dumb high school shit anymore.Â
It took him a moment to realize Steve wasnât planning on doing anything. Was in fact, going to remain perfectly quiet, other than an eyeroll and half-assed middle finger in Munsonâs direction.Â
Tommy let out a disgusted scoff in his direction and then decided to handle things himself.Â
(Like that had ever been a good idea.)
âShut up, Freak. The only game you have is in the prison showers.â He snapped, half rising from the table. âIsnât that why you keep your hair long? So all the boys will actually fuck you?!âÂ
Whistles and yells lit the air, though Steve didnât miss how the girls at the table looked taken aback at the sheer vitriol in Tommyâs voice.Â
Even Carol looked startled, eyes sliding to meet Steveâs as if to confirm she hadnât just imagined it.Â
The three of them had always been good at this kind of mindless high school banter, but this over the top, crude shit?Â
It wasnât Tommyâs style.
It was Hargroveâs.
(That was its own growing issue.Â
The way Tommy was gravitating towards Billy.Â
How Carol kept expecting Steve to act like he used to.Â
That she blamed his âoutburstsâ on Nancy, snidely mentioning that Steve had better have learned his lesson about âchanging his personality for pussy.âÂ
Even now Steve knew they were only defending him because Munson was the one saying it.)Â
âI didnât realize Harrington still had his attack dog!âÂ
Munson put a hand against his heart as though injured, staggering dramatically backwards.Â
âI thought you were too busy putting your tongue up Hargroveâs ass to bark at people!âÂ
Tommy immediately fired back, letting loose an uninspired string of curse words and something about Eddie being queer again. Steve didnât hear the specifics--didnât care to hear it, even as things started to spiral out of control.Â
All he wanted to do was go home.Â
Ideally before Billy got back from lunch and decided to make a spectacle himself, because Steve could feel that coming just as he could everything else.Â
He was running out of time to come up with an excuse to get out of here without making a production out of it, and Munson wasnât someone he wanted to piss off today, given heâd half hoped to buy weed off the guy before he ditched.
âŚWhich was looking more and more unlikely given Tommy had just screeched some insult that had put Munsonâs sights back on Steve.Â
âYou sure? Cause Harrington looks like heâs just gonna sit there and take it, just like he takes everything Hargrove and Wheeler and anyone else throws at him.â
He leered, leaning forward as if to see into Steveâs very soul.Â
âI donât know if anyone else has noticed, but our beloved King here hasnât exactly been defending his crown. If anything, heâs abandoned it.âÂ
The world stopped.Â
This was the first time someone actually called him out on the fact that he often let whatever crap Billy spewed go. That Nancy and him had a few awkward encounters publicly, with at least one of them starting a rumor that sheâd told Steve to fuck off.Â
(She hadnât of course, but Carol had stopped running damage control, and Steve was feeling the effects of her ire.)Â
Silence echoed, and Steve realized with a dawning sort of horror, that Munson was waiting for a response from him.Â
Just as the entire cafeteria was.Â
The catalyst was here, brought on early by one Edward Munson.Â
With a startling amount of clarity, Steve realized he was done.Â
With his so called friends, with the girls whoâd tried corning him all morning, with Hargrove and just--everything.Â
He was over it.Â
If Billy wanted the crown so bad he could fucking have it.Â
(If Tommy wanted to pretend he was tougher than he was by mimicking the dick, then he could have that too.)Â
âThis is stupid.â Steve announced, dropping the masks he so carefully wore. The ones he kept having to fix, because the Upside Down and its related demons (human and non) kept taking chunks out of it.Â
He stood, feeling the weight of the room press down on him as he faced them all down.Â
âYeah--!â Tommy started to pile on, seeming to think Steve was about to unleash hell, and got the surprise of a lifetime when Steve turned and jammed a finger in his face.
âShut up.â He snapped.Â
Knew instantly he only got away with it by the fact that heâd caught everyone off guard. Â
King Steve did a lot of things, but he rarely blew up.Â
âThis is stupid.â He reiterated, voice booming across the lunch room, â You wanna fight? Fine, but leave me out of it.â Â
âThe King doesnât want to play? Why I never thought weâd see the day!â Munson clucked his tongue, and without missing a beat Steve turned to him.Â
 âFor someone who is always screaming about nonconformity, you sure are happy to attack anyone who doesnât do what you want.â
Steveâs voice was loud, but he wasnât screaming. Wasnât yelling or throwing his arms around.
He didnât need to. Had never needed to.Â
âI heard you going off on that guy whose lunch you're standing on yesterday, because he wanted to watch the Colts play.â Steve continued, voice cold. âHalf of your friends are terrified of you, because youâll scream at them just like you accuse us of doing--and letâs be real here, Munson, you do it more.â
In a dramatic move that absolutely, 100% came from Dustin and his theatrics, Steve shrugged his letterman jacket off and bunched it into a ball.Â
âYou might as well crown yourself King, because youâre the exact same as the rest of us. Here--you can start with this.â Â
Cocking back an arm, Steve let the jacket fly. Watched with everyone else as it landed neatly right at Eddieâs feet.Â
Shell shocked, Munsonâs eyes drifted from Steve down to the letterman jacket and back. They were massive, those stupid eyes of his, but at least it meant Steve could see the realization wash over the guy in real time.Â
Steve should have felt smug about it. His past self would have.
Presently?Â
He just felt tired.Â
âYouâre welcome to jam it up your ass.â He finished, before giving his own sarcastic half bow to the room. Â
The cafeteria was dead silent. Not a fork was scraped, or a loud piece of chip chewed. All eyes were on Steve, some waiting to see if Eddie would let him have the last word, others just shocked to see Steve lose his shit in front of them.Â
Idiot he was, he tried to rally anyway.Â
Even Tommy, whoâd partly stood up, hands pressed against the lunch table looked shocked.
âWhat the fuck Steve!?â He sputtered, and it wasnât long before half the basketball team was muttering similar remarks.Â
They were ignored.Â
Whispers ripped across the room when Steve turned on his heel, striding towards the exit and making it clear things were over, but Tommy didnât give up.Â
âFuck you Harrington!â He hurled at his back, Carol now standing and placing a restraining hand on his arm. âYouâre not fucking better than any of us!âÂ
Steve didnât even look back.Â
"That's my point Tommy." Steve said, loud enough to be heard. "No one is better than anyone else. You lot are all just buying into your own bullshit.âÂ
Then he was slamming through the doors, and out into the sunlight.Â
xXx
He didnât want to go home.
Not anymore, which was ironic in a way that made Steveâs face screw up in a grimace. Â
Here heâd been dying to go to his stupid house all day, and now, after losing his shit and undoubtedly, the last of his social standing, he just didnât feel like being by himself.
All alone, in a house too big for him, full of nothing but dark corners and a phone that never rang.Â
So instead, he wandered, reminiscing on how Valentine's Day used to be his favorite day of the year.Â
Steve loved the gesture of it all--the romance, the wooing. The butterflies floating in one's stomach, mixing with fear of rejection and a burning kind of hope towards starting something new.Â
Of course, Steve also had always had a girl in mind, when he celebrated. Now, after NancyâŚ
He did not.
It felt weird to go to Skull Rock--the place he himself had made into Hawkins hottest makeout spots. Likewise all the local restaurants were off limits--too many adults knew how much he loved the holiday.Â
Steve didnât want to face that. The expectations, the knowing winks that would slide into uncomfortable frowns. Any possible advice given wouldnât be appreciated, and the last thing Steve wanted was to get the âeveryone has an off season, sonâ speech.Â
So heâd stayed away from his usual haunts. Explored some storefronts instead, the Beamer parked in front of Family Video as he wandered.Â
Had an entirely too peaceful two hours, which of course, meant he had to bump into someone.
At least, Steve thought dully, whole body tensing in preparation, it was Munson.Â
Not Hargrove, or Tommy, or hell--the children, demanding he help them fight some other fucked up creature the government had accidentally summoned.Â
âHey Harrington.â Munson said, and it took a moment for Steve to realize the guy was embarrassed. âI uh, I need to talk to you.âÂ
Steve just stared at him.
âIf you couldnât tell from earlier,â He warned, âIâm a little done talking for today.âÂ
Or any day, for the foreseeable future.Â
âYeah no--I, I got that. I--okay.â Eddie stopped rocking on his heels, before giving his entire body a shake, like the guys sometimes did while prepping for a game. âHear me out, and then you can deck me or leave or whatever makes you feel better.âÂ
âIâm not going to deck you.â Steve said, exasperated and frazzled and not wanting to do this whole song and dance a second time.Â
Not that it mattered, because Munson had already launched right into whatever it was he needed to say.Â
âThereâs this book right? My Uncle got it for me. Itâs a fantasy book all about this big battle and thereâs these wizards in it, and--â He stopped himself, shaking out his hands.
Like he realized he was rambling and needed the movement to get himself back on track.Â
âI always--I guess I saw myself as a Gandalf kinda guy? Like I was this shepherd herding these lost sheep. A person who intimately knew all the dark forces of the world and could be a shield for them. Do not pass and all that.âÂ
He chuckled, but it was weak, and he killed it almost immediately.Â
â...Okay?â Steve said, knowing he was supposed to say something here, even if he had no idea what.Â
Maybe something about how Gandalf the Grey wasnât exactly a shepard given heâd led the hobbits straight into Mordor, but saying that meant admitting Steve knew what Lord of the Rings was, which wasnât a conversation he felt like getting into.Â
Particularly not because heâd only read the damn things after losing a bet to Dustin and Mike both.Â
Munson nodded, as if acknowledgement was all he needed.Â
 âI thought thatâs what I was doing. I wasnât and I didnât realize I wasnât until you pointed it out. You shouldnât have had to point it out. You shouldnât have had to say any of what you did.â He rushed to add, oddly sincere.Â
"Is thisâŚ" Steve might be confused but catching on, an uptick at the corners of his mouth as the tiniest spark of amusement leaked through. "an apology? Are you trying to apologize right now?"
Eddie groaned, flinging his head back. "No!âÂ
Then immediately;Â
âActually yes, but--â Â
Which caught Steve off guard enough that he laughed, and had to hide it with a cough.Â
âI am sorry, man. I shouldnât have said that shit about you, especially not about you and Wheeler. It's more than that though.â Munson swallowed, before squaring his shoulders. âItâs that you were right."Â
âI was right?â Steve repeated dumbly, because fuck, he couldnât believe it either.Â
Not that Munson heard him. Eddie always had been hard to stop once he started, and Steve had been in enough classes with the guy to know the train had left the station.Â
"I did yell at Jeff because he wanted to watch that stupid football game.â He began, and Steve got a front row seat to watch as one Eddie Munson word vomited his way through a myriad of emotions.Â
âI fuckinâ lost it on Grant because he missed band practice to drive his sister to some thing. Gareth looked like I was going to hit him when I asked if I had really been that bad--same exact look he gave Hagan and those other assholes that cornered him in the bathroom two weeks ago!âÂ
âTommy did what?âÂ
Steve was promptly ignored.Â
(Or more likely, Eddie simply didnât hear him, too lost in his own voice to realize Steve had said something.)Â
There were a lot of mentions of the Gandalf guy. Where Eddie thought heâd gone wrong, and even something about a glowing eye thing that had Steve a little concerned until he realized Munson was talking about Sauron (and also made Steve realize that heâd been pronouncing Sauron in his head wrong, oops.)Â
âI called up this friend of mine who graduated. Sheâs always been no nonsense, so I asked her for her advice.â Munson said, finally seeming to slow down a little. âShe told me I might as well eat my own doctrine because I sure wasnât living by it, and that if I wanted to fix it then I should start by apologizing. To everyone but--to you, first.âÂ
Eddie took a step back, winging out his hands as if to present himself.Â
âSo here I am. Apologizing.âÂ
A pause wherein neither of them did a thing, which caused him to awkwardly add; âTo uh, you. Harrington.âÂ
âYeah I got that.â Steve said, because what else was he supposed to do here? âGood for you? I guess?â
âMost people either forgive a guy or tell him to fuck off.â Munson pouted, and mimicked like he was kicking at a rock.Â
It made Steve want to laugh again, though he shoved the urge down.Â
âSomeone once told me,â He said instead, speaking slowly to make damn sure he didnât let slip this piece of advice came from a middle schooler. âthat apologies without actions donât really mean anything. Theyâre a start--they let people know youâre aware you screwed up, but no oneâs going to trust you if you donât follow through. So I can forgive you, but I think youâre better off doing this with one of your friends.âÂ
Someone who would hug it out, or at least tell Eddie how he could be better, at least.Â
Rather than argue, Munson just titled his head back, eyes to the sky. Like he was really thinking on the words, before giving a sort of accepting sounding noise. Â
âTrying too.â Steve admitted with a sigh.Â
âThatâs what youâve been doing, isnât it?â He asked, head coming back down so he could stare at Steve.
âThe thing in the cafeteria was a good start.âÂ
âYeah?âÂ
Eddie grinned.Â
âYeah. Donât think Haganâs gonna see it the same way though.âÂ
âWe were falling out anyway.â Steve admitted, and hated how easy it was to say.
That they really were just going through the motions of friendship. Had been, ever since Jonathan had punched Steve in the face.Â
âThink you lost more than just him as a friend, to be honest.â Â
âPro tip about the actions thing, Munson?â Steve said with a snort, once again unsure of where this conversation was going, âNice people donât typically point out when someoneâs turned into a social pariah.âÂ
âNo, I get that. Say,â Eddieâs grin had grown, which Steve would have taken poorly except he invaded Steveâs space with a goofy little hop. âI think you might be in need of some new ones!âÂ
âNewâŚfriends?â Steve hesitated, very unsure of what was happening.Â
Munson promptly stuck his hand out. âYup! So--hello, my name is Eddie Munson, and I am here to apply for the position as your friend!âÂ
Steve snorted, but the harshness of it was taken away by the grin on his face.Â
He took Eddieâs hand, noting how doing so made the older teenâs smile widen.Â
âNice to meet you Eddie, Iâm Steve.âÂ
Excited, Eddie waived their arms up and down, with far more enthusiasm than the gesture required.Â
âHow about we cement our new friendship by renting a truly terrible horror movie and drowning our woes with my other good friend, Mary Jane?âÂ
Then he waggled his eyebrows, like that was something scandalous.Â
âTempting me along with weed, huh?â Steve mused back, sticking his hands in his pockets once Eddie let him go. âGuess youâre a little like Gandalf the Gray after all. Just donât send me on any missions.âÂ
âSteve Harrington.â Eddie gaped, pure delight spreading across his face. âHave you read Lord of the Rings!?âÂ
He got a shrug and a sly; âMaybe.â in response.Â
It was worth the barrage of questions, even if the rapid fire pace of them nearly gave Steve a headache.
(Just as it was worth it several months later, when Steve was comfortable enough to instigate wrestling matches with Eddie over the dumbest of things.Â
One particularly semi-drunk tussle over the remote led to an interesting discovery when Eddie popped a boner, and then frantically tried to escape when it brushed against Steveâs leg.Â
 Instead of panicking--or letting Eddie bolt in his panic, Steve just dropped his whole weight down, effectively pinning the slimmer man to the floor.Â
âSteve.â
Eddie said it so quietly he almost didnât hear it, the word filled with desperation.
The kind of tone someone whispered a prayer in, a sort of pleading that Eddie did better with his eyes than his voice. Or would have, given his own were firmly scrunched closed the second he realized heâd been caught out.Â
Except--
âNot right now Iâm thinking.â Steve told him absently.Â
Which he was. Speed thinking even, if that was a thing.Â
Because if two plus two equaled four (which it did) then feeling the exact same, fluttering excitement about Eddieâs boner as Steve had Nancyâs breasts, equaledâŚ
âThe fuck? Steve--â
Steve shushed him.Â
That pulled a frustrated, embarrassed groan from Eddie that went directly to Steveâs own dick, not that it needed much help waking up.Â
âI think Iâm having one of those crisisâs Robin is always accusing the basketball team of having.â Steve informed Eddie dutifully, the dots done connecting.
Eddie, still refusing to open his eyes, snorted.Â
âWhatever man. Can you at least be decent and hurry up with the beating? This is embarrassing enough.âÂ
âIâm not going to beat you up.â Steve said, thankful that his brain managed not to add some shitty comment about the entire town being awash in rumors of Eddieâs sexuality. That heâd confirmed it here wasnât exactly a surprise.Â
âIâm going to try something. If you donât like it, let me know.â Streve added, before screwing up his courage and leaning down.
That of course, got Eddie to open his eyes.
âWha--â He managed, before Steveâs lips were on his.Â
For one single, blissful moment, Eddie Munsonâs mouth was too busy to talk.Â
âYeah?â Eddie said, voice wrecked, and oh, Steve liked that.Â
âHuh.â Steve muttered, when they broke for air. âWell thatâs new.â
Liked the way Eddie looked at him more, hesitant, but with heat in his gaze.Â
Steve had always been good about knowing what to do with heat.Â
He leaned back down, pecking lightly at Eddieâs lips, and was delighted to find Eddie not only let him, but kissed back.Â
âNot bad, Munson, but I think I could give you a few pointers.â Steve muttered, nose ghosting alongside Eddieâs. âLet me show youâŚâÂ
One boyfriend, several weeks, and another interdimensional monster later, Steve found himself socked in the arm by none other than his coworker, Robin Buckley.Â
In her defense, sheâd confessed her love for Tammy Thompson, still somewhat drugged on the Starcourt bathroom floor, only for Steve to tease her that at least his boyfriend could actually sing.Â
âGod you and Eddie Munson.â She muttered after, smile on her face. âHow did that happen?âÂ
Steve knocked his shoe into hers, returning the grin unabashedly.Â
âSo remember last Valentines Day?â Steve started, all too eager to finally tell someone who understood about the best thing to ever happen to him.Â
Robin of course, would soon also be ranked in that same chart, but Eddie didnât need to know that. )Â
#DADDYS BACK#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#stranger things#pre steddie to steddie#0o0 fanfics#be gentle with me I JUST got my computer back lmao#this was a warmup I finished out#Ive been writing at work on my lunches#yes I have been working on adopt a jock#and the third part of the holiday hellfire fic#I think I stared at that steddisy one once#maybe#IDK this whole ass month has been a blurr
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#that's so interesting. i really like amelia for her difficult woman swag and i do see the chemistry personally.#she's not in the emotional position to be nice to him or be sweet or lively. maybe I read more into her than what is there but#we certainly get more of Who She Is than we do for Jess#and what their relationship looks like#Sam is her manic pixie dream girl who brings her further from her depression#she makes unreasonable demands of sam because she's too exhausted by depression to care how she comes off#what I'm saying is. i could fix her. sjghsjfn#I'm not trying to argue I'm just chatting#i do agree that most of their scenes are cringy actually haha. which would have been retroactively GOOD if they'd dropped the dreamy filte#*filter#as soon as her husband returned from being MIA (LOL)#the cringe would be part of the storytelling. it was cringe because they were both pretending to be fulfilled and okay and they're not. via @kerryweaverlesbian
Wait actually this might be it!! Because I think when it's phrased like this, Amelia IS very interesting, and I think it really was the dreamy filter of their relationship that makes it so unbearable to watch
I'm struggling to articulate my thoughts here but going back and reading the transcripts it's like, they initially did just use each other to hide but then it developed into Something Real but I just don't buy it lmao. I think there's also the Lisa/Amelia parallel of the brothers leaving the life and having a sense of domesticity, but after Dean and Lisa break up, she still shows up throughout the season + plays a huge part at the end, but after 8.10 when Sam doesn't show up at the hotel, she's not brought up at all for the rest of the season
The scene when Amelia is willing to leave Don (Dan? something i can't remember lol) and goes back to the hotel room while Sam decides not to and rejects both her + the domestic life, is framed as a tragic moment but idk it's just weird to me!! She says right before that Don doesn't stay much because he's at work and all I can think about now is that she's lonely kjdfhgksfjhk which to me makes her more interesting to me but i doubt that's how it was meant to be read lmao
Anyways this is all to say I wish they fully committed to Amelia continuing to try to Fix Sam when they reunited or alternatively had Sam be the one to go back instead of Amelia, just to lean into her using him to to run away
I feel like I could take Sam's s8 domestic life more seriously if Sam and Amelia had any sort of chemistry together but instead every scene with them is so cringey and hard to watch. Which is weird!!! Considering how well Sam's dynamic with all his other love interests have been (Jess, Sarah, Madison, Ruby, Eileen, and Rowena). They're all incredibly different and interesting people and Amelia was like wet cardboard in comparison
#i would absolutely love to hear more of your thoughts on how you'd fix her and feel free to add to this post#or make your own and send it / msg me if this post is getting too long lmao#hoping this isn't going to reach the Intense Sam stans who never fail to be suuuuuuper rude in the tags / my inbox#so as a lil greeting; hi hello don't take this post personally#i like to put dean and cas in Situations too and make their lives harder this isn't me trying to hate crime sam#if you leave a hate ask i will ignore it unless it's really funny so like. be creative or get out etcetc
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