#I hope this isn’t too long I had a lot of thoughts happy Friday everyone
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hiiiiiii <3 i saw you dont mind talking about your past spinal fusion surgery and i LICHERALLY dont know anyone else to ask about it lol i guess my question is like. do you i guess RECOMMEND it? its something im considering cos im like almost in too much pain to function but im scared of being MORE fucked up afterwards :( any insight would be immensely appreciated tysm <3
it’s been about 10 years since my fusion with Harrington rods, I had mine done at 10 levels (from T2-T12 I think) when I was 14 at the University of New Mexico children’s hospital (I’m fine sharing this because I live across the country now)
the first image was my deformity about a year before the fusion, it was pretty significant as you can tell. the fusion itself was honestly one of the most invasive/rough surgeries I’ve had. It was 10 years ago so my memory is a bit blurry but it took around a full year to get back to a semblance of normalcy again
think: relearning to walk, clothe myself, put shoes & socks on, how to bathe, even now to wash my hands in the sink without bonking my head on the mirror in front of me :’) I’ve kneed myself in the chin before too lmao
reflecting on it, the surgery itself was pretty hard on my body and I needed blood transfusions and had to stay hospitalized for about a week afterwards. If you’re properly medicated you won’t remember half of it, but its not the easiest psychologically either. It’s a “routine” surgery as in it’s done often and rarely has complication, but it’s still an invasive surgery and you won’t be doing jumping jacks or sneezing too hard for a year.
it’s true that many people do regret getting fusions because of just how extensive and permanent this type of hardware is. it is also true that lots of people still suffer chronic back pain & back problems afterwards. I have flatback syndrome which contributed to my cervical spine and lumbar spine herniating all over:
In that first image, you can see there’s a vertebrae right in the middle of the fusion that’s not fully incorporated, only half-fused. The surgeon said he left it because it was not deformed enough like the other vertebrae. Some time last year (around the same time I herniated my c-spine) I threw this ONE specific disc out. My chest for months constantly felt like it was being sandblasted or burning or numb. It hurt like hell. I would have to lay on the ground for hours immobilized by the pain and sometimes could hardly breathe
Luckily unlike my cspine, this disc damage healed over a few months and didn’t require another invasive surgery. It was problematic for my surgeons to treat and diagnose though, because you cannot image the spine in an MRI with that big metal artifact that ends up in the picture.
I don’t regret my fusion, I definitely did the right thing at the time when I got it. Recovery was difficult the first few years but now, I barely ever consciously think of my implants. The fact they are so permanent and can never be removed without replacement sometimes feels scary and daunting, but, the alternative is being a vegetable so I’m ok with them for now :)
#I hope this isn’t too long I had a lot of thoughts happy Friday everyone#spinal fusion#flatback syndrome#disc herniation#disc replacement#scoliosis
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⋆✧˚ ༘ prove it (part 2)
pair: paige bueckers x reader
warnings: cussing
summary: notorious player paige wants to take the star volleyball player out on a date
authors note: hi babies !!! sorry this one is so long i was just having so much fun w it! hope you enjoy <3
‧₊˚ ☁️⋅♡𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.
a week after your run in with paige, there’s radio silence. you hadn’t heard anything from the blonde basketball player. you couldn’t help but be a bit disappointed, no matter how many times you told yourself that she wasn’t going to prove anything. you knew paige… not well, but well enough. it had only been your first semester at uconn, but you knew paige’s reputation just like everyone else. she enjoyed sleeping around, but the last you’d heard of her sleeping around was 3 months ago with your teammate. as much as you were disappointed that you hadn’t heard from her though, you were at least happy you hadn’t heard that she was sleeping around. maybe she had changed.
shaking your head, you hear a knock at your door as you rolled out of bed. who could possible be here at 7am? you swung the door open, standing face to face with a girl you’d recognized as kk arnold. she was holding a boutique of daisies. kk was paige’s teammate, what was she doing here so early? and with flowers too?
“i think you have the wrong apartment,” you say, a confused look on her face at your words.
“oh no, i’m at the right place. you’re y/n, and oh yeah i’m kk!” she beamed, trying to shake your hand but not being able to set down the giant bouquet, “ah forget it, but my girl paige wanted me to drop these off since she has basketball workouts every morning this week so… i hope this isn’t weird, but she’s been on me about making this perfect so if you could just take them..” she trailed off, obviously nervous. you took the bouquet from her and set it down behind you.
“thank you kk. do you know how she found my apartment? also, why couldn’t she have dropped them off after her workout?” you ask. kk throws her hands up in a shrug and sighs.
“girl boo, i don’t know! paige is weird. she’s all shy and nervous and shit, ive never seen her act so weird,” she shrugs again, a sudden ‘oh shit’ look on her face. she starts digging around in her pockets, “shit i almost forgot this! paige would’ve killed me for real. here!” she hands a small folded note. “well, gotta go ball! see you y/n!”
you take the note, frozen in place. she sent kk to bring flowers and a note? so maybe she was trying to prove you wrong. “uh thanks kk! bye?” you shout at her as she hurries down the hall. after grabbing the bouquet of flowers, you head back inside your apartment and put them in a vase with water. you couldn’t wait any longer as you unfold the note from paige.
y/n, i hope you like the flowers! i didn’t know what your favorite flowers were so stay tuned… sorry i couldn’t deliver them to you myself. i have workouts every morning and im really busy this week. i got big things planned though for us. imma prove it to you, ma.
p.s. i hope you don’t think im a stalker… i asked your teammates for your address and your schedule. see you soon. <3
- paige
you smile and shake your head, giggling. you couldn’t believe paige was actually doing this for you. paige was notorious though so as much as your heart pounded at the thought of her trying so hard for just one date with you, you had to protect your heart until you fully trusted her. it was going to take a lot more than a bouquet of daisies delivered by her teammate.
up until friday, kk showed up at your door at 7am every day with a bouquet of flowers and a note from paige. monday was daisies, tuesday was peonies, wednesday was tulips, and thursday was lilies. friday morning rolled around though and kk didn’t show up that morning. disappointment rolled through you, but you couldn’t be too upset due to the fact that you knew paige was making an effort. she took the time to send flowers and a note every morning for the past week. you shouldn’t expect anything more.
friday was particularly busy for you as you had errands to run, workouts, class, then practice. the national college volleyball tournament was in just a few weeks and coach was running you guys ragged wanting to perfect every rotation. you played in every rotation so you were especially exhausted and sore after every practice this week. your day went by and still nothing from paige. no kk, no flowers, no notes. you shrugged it off, she was probably just busy today. she had already done so much this past week.
in the locker room before practice, you were telling your teammates about paige and what had been going on. allison, your teammate she had slept with, listened with wide eyes. you expressed that you hoped allison wouldn’t be upset with you or make it weird or anything for the sake of your friendship and team dynamic.
“girl we hooked up one time months ago, this is not weird or anything! i think it’s sweet and i think you should go for it! be careful though okay? we fucked and then she completely ghosted me so just be careful. make her work for it, you’re a special girl y/n. now come on before coach kills us for being late!” allison smiles, patting your back. you sighed, feeling relieved but taking her words very seriously. you would not let paige play you.
after practice, you stayed for a while just to get some reps by yourself. as you were shagging the balls, you heard someone enter the gym. it’s probably just a janitor. you continue with what you’re doing until you turn around and there’s paige at the other side of the gym, volleyballs in hand. you both walk toward the cart to place them in. you suddenly felt very nervous and flustered. it was late and she was here, helping you.
“uh thanks for the help. what are you doing here?” you muster out, feeling a blush creep onto your cheeks. stay calm, stay cool, don’t let her play her. those thoughts echoing in your head.
“i wanted to see you, ma. you weren’t at your apartment so i figured you were here. did you like the flowers?” she asks, smiling. her blonde hair was wet down her shoulders, she wore a white uconn basketball shirt, grey sweats, and a gold chain around her damn neck. oh you were fucked.
“i did, thank you. you didn’t have to do that though. the deal was that you keep your hands and mouth to yourself, not showering me with gifts.” you say, trying not to give in so easily to her charm.
“can’t i do both?” she asks, cocking her head with a smirk on her face.
“i guess…” you shrug. “im surprised though. i haven’t heard anything yet about your typical shenanigans. girls not finding you so irresistible lately?”
she laughs, throwing her head back. “i told you i was going to prove to you that i want to take you out. i am a woman of my word. now come on! i have one last surprise.” she quickly grabs your hand, pulling you towards a table in the corner of the gym. as you approach you see a bouquet of red and white roses and a basket full of goodies. you see snacks, gatorades, face masks, bath salts, fuzzy socks, and a coupon for a free massage. you turn to look at her, a smile bright on your face. she was making it so difficult to resist. she chewed on her lip watching you, she looked… nervous.
“our coach likes to work us really hard before big games so i figured yours probably does too… i’ve never made anyone anything like this before so i hope you like it. kk and aubrey helped me with it so…” she trails off, scratching the back of her neck. all you could do is gape at her. this was the sweetest thing anyone had ever done for you. fuck it. you threw your arms around her, a silent thank you. she left out a deep breath, relaxing into the hug.
pulling away, you verbally thank her and insist that she doesn’t have to do all of this. she just shakes her head, asking if you need a ride home. you close up the gym and paige drives you and you basket of goodies back to your apartment. you begin to learn more about paige and realize that you had already begun to fall for her charm. as you pull up to your apartment building, you reach over and give her a hug, thanking her again for everything.
you pull away and slip out of the car. you begin to walk away as you hear her shout, “see you next week, ma!”
“what’s next week?” you shout back.
“your next surprise!” she smiles and drives off. you stand there stunned, you were falling for paige bueckers and you could only hope it doesn’t come back to bite you.
#uconn wbb#paige bueckers#paige bueckers fic#paige bueckers x reader#wbb fic#uconn women’s basketball#uconn x reader
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Fuck-it Friday
Tagged by: @ebdaydreamer
So this is not a new fic to me because I've been working on it for a bit, but its new to you all. Its the first fic where I've ventured into the A/B/O universe. It is also a season 2 AU after Doug comes back and attacks Chim and tries to take Maddie, but doesn't succeed. Instead Doug gets away, and Maddie and Buck run from L.A. Shannon lives bitches! But the biggest part of this story is Buck finding out he's pregnant while on the run. Surprise! We can all guess who the father is. Anyway, below is the letter that Buck sends to Eddie. But does he receive it???????
Eddie,
I am so sorry that you have to find out this way, but Maddie and I have had to toss our phones twice because of Doug. But I had to tell you. Let me start by saying, we are safe. I wish I could say where but you of all people know I can’t. I really thought we would be home by now, so I could tell you this in person. But Doug is relentless and apparently has higher connections than we originally thought. So again, I’m sorry and I never intended for any of this to happen.
I’m pregnant Eddie and its yours. Maybe it’s hard to believe. I’m still having trouble believing it. But those days we spent together in November…well life came to be.
It took some thinking and a very long, eye-opening lecture from Maddie, but I know how it all happened. I wasn’t lying back then when I told you I was on birth control. What I didn’t mention was the fact that I had started it just a few days prior to my heat. Maddie believes it may have triggered it. We’re not entirely sure. What I did learn is that the birth control I was on is adequate at best for male omegas and the only time we can get pregnant is during a heat. My previous doctor is getting an earful when I get back. That isn’t me saying I don’t want our baby, I do.
This probably the worst time to even be pregnant, but I am so happy and excited. I’m also so so scared. I wish I was with you and the rest of the 118. I wish Maddie and I could come home. I really wish that dog had ripped Doug’s throat out instead of a chunk of his leg. I wish for a lot of things. But my biggest wish, is that you could be here for everything involving the pregnancy. Check-ups, ultrasounds, the little flutters of movement, hell even the vomiting (why is it called morning sickness when it happens ALL DAY). I know how much you regret missing everything with Shannon and Christopher, and I feel awful that I’m putting you through that all over again. But until Doug is no longer a threat, I must stay away to keep our baby safe. Until then Maddie and I are recording everything. I’ll try to send more later, but its risky. I’m sure you’ve already heard; Athena believes Doug’s joined up with an Alpha group that believes in harsh traditionalism and are helping him track us down. Which includes watching our friends and family for any clue of where we are. Hide or burn this letter. Hide the ultra-sound and don’t say a word to anyone until we return. I’ll try to write more and send what I can.
Eddie, I am so sorry. I really am. And I’m not expecting anything from you, but I know you want to be a part of this baby’s life. You are the most amazing father. Christopher is going to be the best big brother. Maybe you wish that this child was between you and Shannon again. I kind of wish that too…
Our baby is completely healthy, and I’ll keep doing my very best to insure they stay that way. It’s the least I can do considering the situation. I hope everyone is doing good. Maddie and I miss you all every day. We really hope Doug is caught soon and we can come home. And we will come back, I really believe that. I hope you and everyone else does too.
Stay safe, give Christopher a hug for me, and again I’m so sorry.
Buck
What do you think? I'm actually kind of excited for this because have I got some twists and turns and angst and big man little baby!
Tagging (not to be pushy!): @911onabc @alyxmastershipper@elvensorceress@bekkachaos
#fuck it friday#911 fox#911 fic#buddie#buddie fics#my wips#a/b/o verse#season 2 au#evan 'buck' buckley#maddie buckley#eddie díaz
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Hello! I've been wanting to write to you for a long time, since I read your story "last (friday) night" and then I realized that you had also written "horrible" I love both! <3 But I must say that I belong to the group that would like a second part of "last (friday) night", because I like happy endings, even if there is anguish in the middle. But I also want to give my reasons why I want a second part! I know Rocket has serious unresolved emotional issues, but I still wish he could finally face them, It would be interesting to see how he fights with himself and his demons.
I am also writing a fic right now (it will be long and I still don't know if it will be x reader or OC), I have some parts written and what you have written has helped me a lot as inspiration. Even so, if you finally decide not to do a second part, I'll accept it, sometimes not everything goes as expected. But if with my comment I can get you to reconsider or think about it then it's worth a try!
PD: My English isn't very good, so if there's something you don't understand, I'm sorry! I'm also saying this because I just sent you a request on ao3 :)
(if you’d like to read last (friday) night.)
First and foremost, your english is good, especially since it probably isn’t your first language, keep it up!!
Thank you so much for reading my fic and your kind words on them, I know it’s probably getting repetitive at this point but I really am glad to know you liked it! I’ve never had this many comments on a fic before so this is really new for me!
Also, woah, I didn’t think this whole ‘ending or sequel’ thing would become a real topic for my asks! It’s pretty cool how you guys are telling me what you think because honestly after the first bit, you guys play a huge part on what happens next, so thank you guys for being really open!
I’ve decided to make a tag for anything on my blog (especially asks) regarding this fic so I can keep track of everyone’s thoughts on it.
Onto your fic, you have no idea how stoked I am to know you were inspired by my fic! LFN was actually inspired by other authors I’ve found on ao3 who’ve written Rocket smut (here’s the ao3 collection I’ve made just for it SKSJSD you can take inspo from them too!!)
Goodluck with your x reader/oc fic!! I really hope the best for you because as someone who used to write oc fics like a LONGGG time ago I understand how hard it can be to get an audience for oc fics and even for x reader fics there’s still a lot of skeptics out there who still criticize it even now. It’s really nice to know that you were inspired by my fic though, thank you for telling me this, it really made my day!
I’ll see what I can do about LFN because the thing is I’ve gotten quite a number of requests since publishing LFN and I’d like to fulfill some of those to give back to you guys for reading my fic <33
Just know that I have taken everyone’s thoughts into consideration regarding LFN and I’ll see if writing up a part 2 will be better for it.
#last (friday) night.#guardians of the galaxy#rocket raccoon#gotg#gotg fanfiction#gotg fic#gotg vol 3#rocket raccoon x you#rocket raccoon x reader#gotg vol 1#gotg vol 2#ask reply#ask response
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it's rare for two people to fall in love at the same time
Best friends to lovers! Jeno x fem!reader ft. the dreamies
Word count: 5.6k
Warnings: mentions of alcohol, some cursing, slightly suggestive
Note: happy birthday Jeno Lee !! <3 jk. I know it’s been more than a month since his birthday but I was too busy with my finals to finish this au in time for his birthday :( Anyways, here’s a best friends to lovers!jeno au for everyone! I hope all of you have been doing well! I have also recently set up my kofi and will be opening commissions soon, so stay tuned for that! For now, enjoy some fluffy Jeno content <3
You’ve been best friends with Jeno since freshman year in highschool, the two of you lived in the same neighbourhood and would hang out together all the time. Now, you’re both in the same college, in courses you’re passionate about. He frequents your apartment when your roommate isn’t around and you go over to his place just as often, even if just to hang out with him and the rest of the boys.
It’s a Friday night and you have your small apartment to yourself, since your roommate is crashing at her boyfriend’s. And you thought, why not invite Jeno over since you haven’t really hung out together because of how busy school has been. It was just another night over at your place, another heart to heart talk, another sleepover.
Except, tonight wasn’t just another night.
You two had some to drink, Jeno was on his second bottle of soju but his tolerance is pretty high so you assumed that he was still pretty sober. Maybe it still helped that he had a little liquor to pump up his courage.
“Have I ever told you that I think you’re really pretty?” he asked, as he leaned closer to look at your face. Although his neck was slightly red, his eyes were clear and genuine.
You, on the other hand, just downed your first bottle when he said that. You were not a bad drinker, but you’re not the best drinker either. You were tipsy to say the least, so you laughed and pushed his face away, telling him to shut up while doing so.
“No, like, seriously.”
“No… Actually, yes, once. At our highschool prom, but I hated my dress that night.”
“Ah, right. I always thought you were really pretty though, like all the time.” He took a swing of soju after he completed his sentence.
You frown, genuinely confused even in your tipsy state. You could feel your heart thumping steadily in your chest. The thumping rang loudly in your ears, you can’t tell if it was because of the alcohol in your system or the words that Jeno just said. You wondered if he could hear how obnoxiously loud your heart was beating.
He looked at you and chuckled at your expression, shaking his head before mumbling a soft, “nevermind”.
“You’re drunk,” you said, taking a sip from your newly opened bottle, all the while trying to excuse what he said as drunken words. Then you remembered that people were a lot more honest when they’re drunk and you want to slap yourself in the face.
“Maybe, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make things weird.”
You shook your head, meaning to tell him that it was fine.
Your conversation drifted into other things. About how finals sucked ass, how you don’t know how you’re going to pass your data analytics class. He talked about training, about how he can’t feel his legs sometimes after skating in the rink for so long. Then, you two talked about the future.
“I hope we could still be this close after we graduate,” you tell him, pulling his hand towards you and holding it. You two held hands often, not outside when you’re walking in the streets like a couple. But in special, heartfelt times like this.
Jeno first held your hand during your highschool prom, when your parents insisted on taking multiple photos of you two together, even though both of you had your own dates. You two still danced together that night, just for sentimental purposes.
You held his hand when he lost his first ice hockey match in college. He really didn’t play well that day, you held his hand to lift him off the ground where he sat to sulk after the game. And held his hand a while more after that, just to provide some solace.
“We will be, you have nothing to worry about.” Jeno assured you without hesitation.
The night continued on and you were dozing off on the sofa, so Jeno started cleaning up a bit. He started by disposing of the empty pizza boxes that were lying on the coffee table. He cleared the soju bottles too and by then, he was sure you were knocked out on the sofa. And needless to say, he was right.
He tried to nudge you softly awake to bring you to your bed, but you only whined in protest. So his last resort was to carry you, which he was used to doing on nights like this. You were awoken by suddenly being lifted off the sofa but kept your eyes closed because your mind was too tired to fight the drowsiness that the soju brought.
Jeno placed you gently down on your bed and got dragged down along with your arms that circled around his neck. You knew damn well how bad you look drunk and maybe it was liquor courage helping you this time, because you spoke before you could think of stopping yourself.
“Even now, you think I’m pretty?”
Jeno’s face was mere inches away from yours, you could feel his breath on your cheeks and smell the alcohol that stuck to your bodies. And if Jeno was anyone else, he might just kiss you right now. But he was not going to do that to you, especially not when you’re drunk. He convinced himself that he would save this for another time, if fate allowed it.
But you are not Jeno and you lack the self-control that he possessed. You stared at his lips, his pink and pretty lips. And since your arms were still wrapped securely around his neck, you began to pull him in.
However, he tugs at your arms lightly, freeing himself from your hold and continues to tuck you in.
In that moment, the slight embarrassment began to set in and you let him go.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean t-” you started but was cut off by Jeno.
“y/n, it’s fine. Trust me, I want it too. But not like that, you’re tipsy and I don’t want us to do something you might regret tomorrow.”
You only nodded as a reply, not really knowing what to think. Because yet again, your heart was thumping so loudly, you couldn’t comprehend what he just said or what he meant.
“But to answer your question, yes. Even now I think you’re pretty, I always think you’re pretty,” he replied with the smile that reached his eyes.
He pats your head, like he does every time he puts you to bed when you’re drunk. Except that this time, you’re not asleep yet. And you stare at him, smiling endearingly down at you. With the soothing way Jeno is patting you, you gradually fall into a sleepy state.
With the amount of soju in your system, it was no wonder that you eventually fell asleep despite all the emotions that sent your thoughts spiralling. The last thing you remembered was Jeno continuously patting your head as you drifted off to sleep. When Jeno was sure you fell asleep – signalled by your slowed and deep breaths – he gave in a little and pecked you lightly on the forehead. This would be his little secret that he would bring to his grave.
And that was how the night ended. Jeno went to wash up and came back to sleep on the foldable mattress you always had in your room for when he sleeps over. Tonight however, the thought of the girl sleeping on the bed beside him was busy keeping him up all night.
You woke up feeling a little groggy but nothing yet close to a hangover. Still, Jeno left hangover tablets on your bedside table like he always does, along with a cup of water. And as you take the tablets, you realise that Jeno wasn’t in the room.
You went to wash up and still, no Jeno in sight. Your roommate was also not home yet.
You went back to your room to make your bed and paused when you remembered what happened yesterday. There’s no way Jeno just left like that, right?
Just then, you hear the opening and closing of your apartment door and you walk out to see Jeno. He had his glasses on and was wearing a baseball cap, along with his hoodie and sweatpants that he left in your apartment from his previous visit.
He looked at you as he held up the all too familiar Starbucks bag and gently shook it, chuckling at how relieved you looked. You really needed some coffee, after a night of drinks and also to prepare yourself for the conversation you were going to have with Jeno.
You know how there’s this belief that girls and guys can’t be ‘just friends’, let alone best friends? You always thought this didn’t apply to you and Jeno. He was your best friend and that was it. That was until he got his first girlfriend. It was then that you realised that maybe he wasn’t just a best friend to you.
You wouldn’t say that you got jealous. But you got pretty close to it, you never mentioned it to Jeno though. But you were sure that it showed somehow.
On Jeno’s end, the relationship wasn’t what he imagined it to be. His girlfriend was great and she really liked him and he would say that he really liked her too. Then, how come he keeps thinking about you even when he’s with her? They broke up eventually because Jeno was training too often to spend enough time with her.
When you started dating someone too, Jeno didn’t look like he was jealous. And to be completely honest, he wasn’t. He was more angry than jealous. Because your boyfriend was so insecure about your friendship with Jeno that he was manipulating you to try and mess with your friendship. However, your friendship with Jeno was stronger than these tactics. Thankfully, you were smart enough to break things off before it got out of hand. You were still heartbroken though, and you wouldn’t stop crying for days.
All Jeno could do back then was bring you the food you liked and stayed with you till you felt better.
Both of you knew that your friendship wasn’t as simple as you two hoped for it to be.
And now, the two of you were seated at your dining table, facing each other. You took a sip of your warm coffee, feeling much better than when you just woke up. Coffee works like magic for keeping you awake and energised for most days, but you believe there’s no cup of coffee strong enough to prepare you for the conversation you’re about to have with Jeno.
He was tapping his coffee cup, staring at every little thing in your tiny apartment except you.
You took in a deep breath and gave yourself a quick mental pep talk and finally spoke.
“Don’t you have something you want to tell me?”
His eyes averted from the window behind you as he looked you in the eyes and pressed his lips tightly together. He held his coffee cup with both hands as he straightened his back, as if preparing to speak.
“Ah… that, last night was just…I was… I didn’t really know what I was doing.”
You looked at him with your eyebrows raised, obviously taken aback. Was he about to pretend like nothing happened last night? Who does he think you are? You two have been best friends for years and he thinks you wouldn’t pick up when he’s lying?
The way he’s rubbing his thumbs together anxiously and the way he can’t even look you in the eye after saying what he said.
“You’re lying!” you accused him loudly.
His eyes widened, like how they always do when he starts to get defensive.
“What? I’m not!” He quickly refutes before his lips fall into a pout. He has a tendency to pout unknowingly when he bickers with you. And it triggers something in you, you let the words slip out before you even thought to stop yourself.
“Then how did we end up almost kissing last night?”
After you realised what you said, your face fell and you instantly felt your fight, flight, freeze response kick in and since you couldn’t hide anywhere in this tiny apartment, you froze.
Jeno opened his mouth as if to say something only to close it. His eyes averted briefly down to your lips before catching himself and looking you in the eye again. A light hue of pink spreaded across his cheeks and you were sure your expression mirrored his too.
After a few seconds of neither of you speaking, Jeno sighed.
“I’m not lying though, I really didn’t know what came over me. I’m just… I’m really conflicted y/n. I don’t know what to do.” He said as he leaned back against the chair, putting both his hands in the pockets of his hoodie.
You felt yourself frown slightly, “Why? Are we not on the same page? You like me too…right?”
Jeno pushed his glasses up in an attempt to hide his smile behind his hand, then his expression turned serious again. His worries threaten to overwhelm him again.
“I-i do.”
He finally admitted it. He finally lets you know and he felt like he was going to explode. So he does the only thing he knows to do and let his body take control. He pushed the chair back and stood up abruptly. You look up at him, confused as to what he is about to do.
Jeno took five quick steps to your sofa and plopped himself onto it, face first (with his glasses still on his face, man is fearless). You can’t help but let out a laugh, standing up from the dining table to walk over to him.
You pulled a cushion out from under him and whacked him gently with it multiple times, “What the fuck is wrong with you? Get up and talk to me properly like a man!” You playfully mocked him.
He lifted himself up from his lying position to grab another cushion to shield himself. “Okay, okay, stop it,” he protested in between your attacks.
He swiftly pulls the cushion out of your hands and drags you down to sit beside him. You were now face to face again, but closer now, without the dining table separating you two.
“I just don’t want things to change. I love how things are but I also want more. But I’m afraid of wanting more. What if things don’t go well? What if I end up losing my best friend?” He tells you while looking into your eyes. The air in the room stills as he waits for your reply.
You could tell by the look in his eyes that he probably thought of the worst case scenario over and over again already. You have similar concerns too.
Movies and books always make falling in love with your best friend look so magical. And in your case, it kind of is magical. It’s a good thing that both you and Jeno have fallen for each other. But he’s right, who knows if things will go well? At the same time, how could you rule out the chance that this could be the best thing to happen with the two of you?
It is completely normal that Jeno was conflicted. But you didn’t want to miss out on this opportunity in the name of ���not ruining the friendship’. So you did the only thing you knew could put his mind at ease and assure him.
You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him into a hug. You felt his shoulders relax as his arms circled your waist, bringing you closer to him. “We’ll just have to make it work then. We’ll be fine… great even. We’ll be the best couple ever, I promise.” You assured him best you could, even though you shared the same concerns. But they didn’t matter right now.
You felt him chuckle against you as you pulled away to look at him, arms still around his shoulders. “Then, I promise I’ll take care of your heart from now on if you let me,” he whispers loud enough for you to hear as he leans his forehead against yours. It was both the cheesiest and the sweetest thing you have heard coming from Jeno.
You can’t help but scrunch your nose – something you did often when you get flustered. “Don’t get shy with me now, you wanted me to talk to you about it like a man.”
“Are you always going to be this cheesy? Because I can’t promise I won’t just laugh in your face when you say things like this.” You tell him as you push him away lightly to hide your flustered face.
“Hey, I’m trying my best to be a good boyfriend here, plus I’m actually being serious too,” the both of you couldn’t help but laugh at the absurdity of the past ten minutes. Less than half a day ago you two were seated on this same sofa hanging out as best friends. And now, you’re two blushing adults, revealing your ‘long-hidden secret’.
“So, you’re my boyfriend now, huh? Since when? You didn’t even ask.” You teased, realising how he very smoothly self-proclaimed the title.
He rolled his eyes as he pushed his glasses up again and cleared his throat.
“Will you be my girlfriend?” He mumbled while looking away.
“What was that?” You frowned exaggeratedly while cupping your right ear, pretending you didn’t hear him.
“My dear y/n, will you be my girlfriend? Before I consider retracting the offer,” he said with gritted teeth. You gasped at the audacity of this man and he laughed at your reaction.
“Fine, fine. I’ll be your girlfriend, don’t retract the offer,” you replied in fake reluctance.
The two of you hugged again, and you felt yourself melting into his arms, the cups of coffee left forgotten on the dining table. The hug fell into a half an hour long cuddle that consisted of the first few awkward minutes of trying to get into a comfortable cuddling position. With the rest of the time you two fell into comfortable conversation, it’s like nothing really changed. And yet, everything has.
You two talked about how things will be like from now on and realised that it’ll pretty much be the same, just better. Because you two don’t have to resist your feelings anymore. The secret is out and you can both relish in the fact that you can openly express your love for the other now.
The next few weeks went by and the two of you were inseparable, just like in highschool. When both your schedule permits, you would have meals together in school. He crashes at your apartment more often than you did at his place since your roommate walked in on the two of you cuddling in your room once. No doubt, you were teased to death everyday for at least a week after she found out.
If that sounds bad, you can’t even begin to imagine how the boys would react if they found out. Which is why you and Jeno rarely slept over at his place anymore, because to his friends, you two were very much still merely best friends.
However, you were over at his place one day after your classes because you missed his stupid face after not seeing him for two days straight. Jeno said he would drop by your place once he was done playing his video games. But you knew that meant that he might turn up at midnight and for the sake of your sanity (being a college student is not easy, sigh pie) , you could not afford to have another late night this week.
He also informed you that most of the boys had club activities or were out today. So here you were, sitting on his bed, reading one of your course texts while he played his ‘last round’ of this video game on his computer. He has been on the said last round for the past hour and you were sure you saw him die and respawn more than once already.
“Lee Jeno…” you called out through gritted teeth, burning holes on the back of his head with your glare.
“Yes baby?” He replied while his fingers moved frantically across his keyboard.
“Can’t you spend some time with me while I’m here?” You said as you got up to stand beside him, gently running your hand through his dark hair, while watching his progress in the game.
You always had a habit of ruffling his hair even from back in highschool. In the past, it was an act of simple teasing. You used to do it especially when he was sulking over something, like when you pretended to forget his birthday. When really, you were planning to surprise him with some of his friends. Or when he got upset over you not wanting to go to get ice cream with him at three in the morning because you wanted to sleep.
Recently however, it has turned into something more natural and affectionate. Like the effortless expression of longing and love for this man, who was both your best friend and your lover.
“Alright, this will be the last one. Promise.” He said as he tried to move out of the enemy's line of vision. Only to get shot when he turned the corner. He sighed and slumped onto his chair from his previously upright position.
“See, told you it would be the last round,” he looked up at you from the position on his chair and smiled, the kind that turned his eyes into crescents. The realisation that he had you waiting for an hour finally hits him and he was trying to be all cute and clingy now that you’re visibly on the brink of being annoyed.
You rolled your eyes at him and complained about how he has been saying that since an hour ago and he only laughs and pulls you onto his lap. He has a habit of doing this now that you two are together. He would ease your annoyance about his gaming by having you close to him. Sometimes he would have you on his lap and you two would snuggle close like this for a while before he went back to gaming while you got comfortable on his lap, with a book in hand.
The two of you naturally fell into conversation about your respective days up once you stopped nagging at him about his gaming ‘addiction’, to which he would whine about how you sound like his mum. You like to respond to that by ensuring him that you would definitely tell on him when the two of you went home to visit your parents over the semester break.
As your conversation flowed, Jeno filled you in on his ice hockey training schedule, while drawing circles on your thigh as you continued stroking the back of his hair.
“Season begins next month, so trainings are going to pick up. But my weekends are free, so we can hang out on those days,” he said with a hint of worry in his voice.
Jeno started playing ice hockey in highschool, since he had always loved to ice skate. In your junior year, Jeno was appointed as vice-captain of the team, alongside Mark, who was the senior captain. When Mark graduated, Jeno stepped up as captain in his senior year and led the team to victory in the championships for the third year in a row.
To say Jeno was passionate about the sport was an understatement. Jeno loves ice hockey more than anything and always tried his best to improve even though he was already a phenomenal player. And you loved watching him play, you wouldn’t miss a game ever since you first watched him during your sophomore year. As his best friend, you would cheer the loudest when he played well and was there to support him after his lower moments in the rink.
But you could tell from the tone of his voice that he was worried that training would take away too much of his time with you. Even though you didn’t want him to worry about something so minor, it made your heart flutter quite a bit.
“Jen, don’t even worry about it. We’ll work around it, besides, I’ll be at every game so you better train well to win!” You told him as you reached to hold his face in your hands, emphasising your point.
“Oh, bet.” He retorted confidently, following up with a question you knew was coming.
“And what would I get if I do win? Hm?” he asked cheekily pulling you closer to him.
“We’ll see about that when you do win,” you responded, refusing to give in to his antics just yet.
“Well, I’ll suggest that a kiss like this will suffice as a good example of a celebratory gift,” Jeno said as he pulled you in gently by the neck and kissed you. You could feel him smile against your lips as you kissed him back.
In the weeks since you became a couple, kissing quickly became something that happened naturally. Having Jeno’s soft lips against yours was not a foreign occurrence by now, and yet every time your lips met his, you could not stop your heart from beating faster and faster with the passing of each second.
He kisses you gently, carefully, like he was savouring every second of the kiss. Jeno’s lips felt ever so soft as they moved against yours, and you felt your heart swell as if it could explode any minute. He pulled away briefly, his eyes never leaving yours. He pushed your thighs away ever so slightly to give you enough space to reposition yourself so that you were now straddling him.
Then he began as quickly as he stopped, pulling you close by your waist to claim your lips again. This kiss, more intense than the last. Little shivers of pleasure shot through you as Jeno deepened the kiss, parting your lips. You had one hand on his shoulder to steady yourself on his lap as the other hand dug into his locks.
Jeno’s warm hands slid under your shirt, caressing your smooth skin and his touch sent tingles down your spine. Giddiness took over the two of you as you parted again, as Jeno stared at you with a dumbstruck smile on his face. You began to catch your breath, and just when you thought he was done, his hands claimed a firm grip on your bare hips and he lifted you off his lap like you weighed nothing.
Your legs wrapped around his waist as you let out a yelp, shocked from the sudden movement. He began making his way to the foot of his bed and you prepared for the impact of landing on it. With his face so close to yours, he tenderly pecked your nose before leaning in to kiss you once again.
His fingers skimmed over the soft skin of your back as your arms tightened around his neck. Jeno always kissed you like his life depended on it and you returned his kisses with the same longing and intimacy. With Jeno, you finally understood why people always described kissing as melting. You felt like every part of your being was dissolving into him, becoming one.
You feel Jeno’s body leaning forward, and you instinctively hold him closer, ready to crash onto the soft duvet. Instead, you hear the slight creaking of the door and a sharp gasp. Jeno pushed your body away and onto his bed. You landed on the very edge of it, almost toppling over when you catch a glimpse of Jaemin standing by the door with his mouth agape.
“I’m so sorry,” he managed to mutter out. But Jaemin's shock visibly turned into amusement as he chuckled under his breath. He let a few more snickers out as he began to excuse himself from the room, closing the door on his way out.
Before he closes the door fully, he pops his head back in, “I won’t tell the rest, but you have to tell me everything later,” he gleefully tells Jeno, with the biggest smile on his face.
“Okay, fine. Please leave. Now.” Jeno says through gritted teeth as he walks towards the door to try and shove Jaemin out. You watch as the two boys struggle at the door before Jaemin gives up and leaves, Jeno locking the door behind him.
“I can’t believe what just happened,” Jeno uttered as he ran his hand through his hair.
“I can’t believe you just dropped me like that,” you said while laughing as Jeno chuckled with you, apologising as he walked towards you to pull you up to your feet.
“I thought you said none of them were home,” you asked when you two calmed from being caught. To which Jeno could only shrug, “I thought so too.”
“Well whatever, I’ll bear the teasing if it means I can hug you around the house now.”
Jeno gave you a quick peck and engulfed you in a hug. You melted into his hold and hugged him back, swaying slowly as you two stayed like this until Jeno’s phone vibrated on his nightstand.
He let you go to check the notification and you leaned in to look at the screen, only to turn red from the message.
- 5:25pm -
NANA🐰: “don’t forget to use protection ;)”
“This little fucker… WE’RE NOT DOING ANYTHING!” Jeno shouted loud enough for Jaemin to hear it from outside and the two of you could hear Jaemin’s cackling laughter as a response.
Jeno continued cursing under his breath before he plopped himself onto his bed. You laughed at his reaction and joined him. The evening ended with cuddling and the occasional exchange of kisses, but every cuddling session had to come to an end somehow. You had an early lecture tomorrow morning and you had to go back to have an early night.
Jeno tried to convince you to stay the night, even offering to drive you to class if you do. As tempting as it was, you rejected his offer. You knew he had a long day tomorrow, with training after his classes. You weren’t going to have him get up early to drive you to class when he could be sleeping in. So you told him he could sleepover at your place soon and he was satisfied with that for tonight.
He walked you to the door, since you also rejected his offer to drive you to your apartment. It wouldn’t take long and you were going to meet your roommate at the bus stop to walk home together anyways.
When you two left the room, all the boys were already back home. And Jaemin was trying to hide his smile while he was sitting beside Jisung on the sofa. You bid all the boys goodbye after some small talk and went to put your shoes on.
“Have a good rest tonight, I’ll see you soon,” Jeno said as he opened the front door. You hummed in agreement as you gave him a brief hug which you two always did.
“Alright, I’ll see you Jen,” you said as you tip-toed to give him a quick peck on the cheek, before walking out the front door.
“See you baby,” Jeno called out one last time as he waved you goodbye. He couldn’t help but smile as he watched and waved until you entered the lift. He finally locks the front door and turns to walk back to his room. However, he can’t help but feel the stare from six pairs of curious eyes behind him as he walks past them.
He turns to look at his friends staring at him, frowning before muttering out a confused “what”.
“Did you just call y/n…baby?” Renjun asked with wide eyes, to which Jeno froze, realising that the boys saw the whole interaction and the two of you were too infatuated to even remember to keep up the “we’re-just-best-friends” act in front of them.
“And did y/n kiss you on the cheek before she left?” Mark questioned when Jeno failed to answer the first question.
“Trust me, they’ve done more than that-” Jaemin began to say as Jeno’s fight or flight kicked in and he tackled Jaemin on the sofa to cover his mouth before he splurts out anything else. But Jaemin has exposed enough to send Chenle cooing and Haechan frantically asking when this even fucking happened.
Jeno spent the next two hours sitting on his living room floor, getting interrogated by his friends. Half of him wants to punch himself for letting the act collapse in front of his friends like this. But the other half of him was glad it was finally out. With how he couldn’t stop himself from smiling when he told the boys about you to how happy the boys were to see the two of you finally get together despite all the teasing, Jeno was the happiest he has ever been in a while.
Who would have guessed that Jeno would be lucky enough to be in love with his best friend? And how extremely lucky it was that the stars aligned for him, that you too loved him back. Many would see this as the happy ending to a beautiful fairytale. But for you and Jeno, this was just the beginning of an incredible love story.
#nct dream#nct dream au#nct jeno#jeno au#jeno scenarios#nct#nctu#nct au#nct dream scenarios#nct dream fluff#lee jeno#nct dream jeno#jeno fluff#jeno is so cute#j0hnj4ej3n
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the keys
Happy Sinday! 🥳 I’ve been teasing y’all about this one long enough, so here it is!!
summary: You’ve had a bad day, so you go to the one place on Crockett Island that feels like home...
word count: 3,5 k-ish ooof
WARNINGS: A LOT of emotions and some confessions, slightly philosophical and existential themes, mentions of death, grief and nightmares, but most of all, it’s NSFW (18+ only pls) and poetic filth (also remember to wrap it before you tap it my darlings!)
p.s: Hassan is a switch and I take no criticism 🤭
~~~~~
The day started off beautifully.
You keep reminiscing that goodbye kiss. His fingers were keen but reserved, as if he was stopping himself, or the both of you for that matter, because it was already 9am on Friday. There were things for you to get done before the weekend, meetings to attend, people to talk with… the regular.
“I- have- to- go-“ he purred into your lips with each intake of breath between rushed kisses.
“Me-too- sheriff-“ you responded back emphasizing the last word with a smirk.
You’re just as breathless as he is. Cause he makes you feel so many things, makes you smile even now when you think about that morning.
When he’s pulled back, a tired sigh escaped his lips.
“Wade is going to give me a lecture about being late again. And it’s all because of you, you know?”
And though he was making a tough guy face again, all serious and frowned, you couldn’t help but get lost in the softness of his warm, smooth gaze. So full of devotion that you wish you could shrink yourself sometimes.
But the day went on. And pretty quickly it isn’t just memories of him that cloud your mind...
Maybe it’s just one of these days, you think. Sometimes everything is too much, even the normal, repetitive tasks seem too hard to bear.
And so you end up walking yourself to the El Shabbaz home instead of your own earlier than usually, not really hoping that he’ll be there.
Well, you know for a fact that he’s at the school meeting, he’s been stressed about it all week, partially because he’s been having some problems with Ali lately. The boy is clearly going through some sort of a phase, normal at his age but still. It’s something new. For both of them. Especially after the loss of Ali’s beloved mother and Hassan’s soulmate…
The key feels even heavier your hand now than it did when he first gave it to you.
You didn’t get the whole idea at first, laughed it off, called him a party-killer to which he responded with a sincere „just in case”.
But underneath it all, you felt grateful. For the trust he’s given you, for the fact that he’s opened up to you enough to actually let you in. For the fact that he literally gave you a key to his life on the island forgotten by everyone.
Especially grateful, because today you feel like you have nowhere to go, despite having a house of your own nearby. And you crave the safety he provides you with.
The house is empty upon your arrival. Looking around you notice Ali’s backpack tossed in the corner, so you assume he must be busy catching the last breaths of freedom somewhere, before his dad comes home and grounds his ass for good after today’s parent-teacher meeting.
It feels natural to be surrounded by these walls by now. Wrapped in their familiar warmth, identical to the one Hassan carries with himself everyewhere he goes. In the firm but gentle way he walks, speaks, touches. With the attention and empathy he emanates.
But you aren’t a visitor here anymore, no, you know which way to go, and almost instantly, you head towards Hassan’s bedroom. It’s only fair since you’re seeking a temporary shelter of his presence. Even if he’s not physically there.
Once inside, you smile softly. There are some clothes scattered here and there, some already folded. At his nightstand, some trinkets, memories locked inside objects. You note that he borrowed that book you were talking so much about from the local library. Even started reading it. The thought itself makes your heart grow a little fonder.
Now, you don’t remember falling asleep but here you are, fully awake, fully clothed under a thick blanket that smells exactly like him. Α significant contrast to the feeling of cold sweat running down your back.
It was a nightmare, still alive in your head and heart. An irrational one really, a mess of horror, gore and running. The details already become a blur as you blink away the darkness that surrounds you. But maybe sometimes it’s better like this, to not remember.
When you pick up your phone it’s past 11pm already.
And at an instant, you hear him. Hear his footsteps on the squeaking wooden floors, his exhausted groans.
Then you hear him in the kitchen. The dishes as they’re being carefully put in the sink, most likely after he and Ali have had a late dinner.
You wonder if they prayed together before Ali went to sleep. There’s been some tension between them around this topic in the past few weeks, and you know just how much it affects Hassan as a father. It saddens him but he doesn’t want to fight his son, he wants to lift him up above everything else.
And then you hear something you haven’t heard before, a melody. It’s a quiet, hushed one, but nevertheless it’s sweet to your ears.
It never crossed your mind how his voice would sound if he sang, but hearing it makes him seem like a different person. The lyrics are foreign to you, maybe it’s not even English, you cannot tell from afar. But it’s so mellow, so smooth. Like you’re in a dream again, but this time it’s a good dream.
You close your eyes, wrapped in his smell, tone, his warmth.
His touch.
„Hey… oh love, you should’ve texted me, I wouldn’t make so much noise, wouldn’t wake you up.”
The man sat on the edge of his own bed is wrapping the covers slightly tighter around you, eyes wide and attentive, rough hands somehow even more careful. And he’s worried, you see it in the wrinkles around his eyes and on his forehead when the nightstand lamp finally illuminates his face.
„Hassan.” You sit up suddenly, arms hardly enveloping his broad frame. He smells like cigarette smoke and something peppery, like herbs he brews for a better sleep. The hairs from his beard scratch the top of your head briefly before he plants a prolonged kiss there. His embrace calms you down, it always does. And still, your voice trembles ever so slightly as you speak again, this time into his chest. „I just had a terrible day and thought I’d stop by. Wanted to wait for you but I think I fell asleep, and now you’re here.”
„Shhh, it’s alright, I know… I know how it feels…” He whispers with a pained sigh. Both of you inhale deeply in an almost meditative manner, and exhale nearly simultaneously. You chuckle at that and he smiles to himself.
„You used the key.”
He’s smiling even wider now, proud like a lion. You can’t see it, still glued to his chest, but you feel it in the way it puffs out with pride underneaths your fingertips, in the way his voice rings over your head.
Slowly, you crane your neck to look him in the eyes.
He’s so smug about it, with that damn smirk on his face.
„Yeah I did. And what about it?”
A dry chuckle.
„What about it? Well, a ‘thank you’ would be nice for starters?”
But your lips are at his first and he doesn’t mind, instead he plays along your little game. His hands are slowly becoming greedy as they glide over your sides, groping with each confirmatory moan that leaves your mouth.
Your fingers desperately try to reach his skin but it’s like his clothes purposefully stand in your way, effectively shielding him from you.
You want him out of that damn shirt, you want to rip it off and feel him instead.
Suddenly Hassan pulls away. Both of you pant as he warily turns around to peek at the door. Always a father. And it looks so hot on him, it makes you want him inside you even more.
„You drive me fucking insane.” He breathes out.
„I know.” Of course you’re teasing him, provoking the reaction you desire the most.
He knows, he’s smart and you’re more than aware of this. He could leave you right now and save his pride, but that same pride won’t let it slide just like that, not when he has you at his grasp. So close he can feel your heart beating nearly in the same rhytm as his.
Beautiful like a dream, with disheveled hair and heated skin.
And when he looks as you like this, you just know.
It takes you forever, even longer than that evening, hell, longer than that whole damned day. Cause it took hours on hours on hours of building each others’ trust. But it’s out at the speed of light and yet it seems like eternity almost.
„I think I love you.” You whisper.
Hassan stops breathing for a second or two, or so it appears. His mouth agape but you catch a glipse of sparkle in his eyes.
„You- think?!”
No, he doesn’t even give you a chance to add anything and instead knocks the air out of your lungs as he launches forward, locking lips with yours again. And this time it’s more fervent, moving down to your neck, teeth worshiping your skin with slow but violent markings.
And then, lower, but only when you nod at him in consent as you lay down. Right now you’d do anything just to make him go faster, just to cut your bated breath short.
Desperately, you grip the longer strands of hair atop his head and he hums into your freshly uncovered hip.
He keeps dreaming of your skin, have been ever since he’s touched you for the first time. And every time he gets a chance, like a starved man, he feasts. Feeds of the feel of your skin, off your touch. Mouth latches onto the flesh of your thighs, and he nips and sucks, leaves a trail of kisses down your legs while removing the oh-so irritating pieces of clothing along the way. When he sits up again it’s only so he can quickly get out of his own clothes completely.
And to admire you. Your perfectly carved form reflecting in his eyes.
And you too cannot help but just stare, in complete awe of him, of the things he does to your head.
Brows furrowed in an alluring way. Mouth curling into a smirk when your eyes descend over his heaving abdomen. Eyes so dark you could swim in their night abyss.
“Stop staring, or I won’t be able to stop myself any longer.”
His voice is almost authoritative now and you straighten your leg in an attempt to reach him somehow.
“Then don’t.” You tease. And it’s already too late to turn back.
Hassan shoots you a scolding look and you groan, helpless as ever. He’s about to ravish you whole, even if he keeps acting that he’s taking his sweet time with you.
In no time he crawls in between your parted legs.
“Hassan! Oh-”
You’re trapped, a moaning mess trying to shimmy away and out of the reach of his puffed lips and thick tongue, the sharp scratches of his soft beard on your delicate skin. It’s like his face was sculpted to please. To please you. Now he just wants to hear a whine, a cry. A plea.
Hassan wants you on the edge, begging, praising him.
He needs to see you break right in front of him for mere moments that feel like a whole eternity. An eternity within and with you.
„Please…”
It’s an unspoken confirmation. He earned it.
He’s doing a fucking good job.
And you just look so spent and ethereal when he looks up at you from beneath a thick line of his eyelashes…
Yet again, he climbs up, stopping at your sternum to place another loving kiss there before he glances at your elated face. When he raises on his stretched arms, you don’t even have to beg again.
Your whole body tenses for a second or two, eyes wide open as he enters you steadily.
He’s thick and veiny. Fucking delightful to say the least. You’ve been with Hassan plenty of times, on numerous occassions, but each time it’s bliss. And each time it makes the air stop in your lungs.
Your brain is filled to the brim with chants of his name, clouded with pleasure, till it leaves your body with tears gathering in the corners of your eyes.
“Oh God- Hassan-“
He, on the other hand, is feeling ecstatic, as he pants like an ancient idol in raging fury. Skin glowing with sweat and whole body rhythmically shaking and tensing at the same time, with each calculated thrust.
“Come on sugar.”
Yet again he finds himself lost in you. The entirely of you. Surrounded by your tightening walls and soft pieces of sentences, moaned repeatedly into the air. They’re being pulled out of you with the sheet force of his hips snapping into yours, and his chest grows with pride.
„Baby- oh Hassan, p-please”
The sheer thought of filling you makes him feral. Gripping your hips the man speeds up, following your moans and gasps, screams silenced with the force of your teeth biting into your lips.
He wants to worship you, please you forever, he thinks then. Had been thinking about it even before he’s given you the key.
It was so easy to fall for you and it still blows his mind.
Suddenly you gasp and he catches it last minute. Cause every time he can, he does everything in his power to watch you at the gates of your bliss. He drinks it with his dark, hungry eyes. The way you squirm, how you pant and moan, how your body shakes involuntarily. He sees that light in your eyes and comes too, with a shudder and a line of deep, throaty moans that make your walls twitch again.
“Oh fuck.”
You feel everything and nothing all the same. You’re not even sure who said it first, maybe you just repeated it in your head, or maybe you both did between the rapidly taken breaths.
When he pulls out you miss his closeness already. The pleasure is just one part of it all really, cause you miss that intimacy, that weave you create together. As if words, languages can’t bind you two enough, as if there is more.
Sometimes in your conversations Hassan mentions fate, how it affects our lives whether we believe in some sort of god or not. He says that some things are inevitable, like change or loss. Like grief.
Same goes with people. They come into our lives for different reasons. Some of them are destined to change our lives, some are destined to teach us. About loss, forgiveness, patience, joy. And all of them, all of these relationships will be interwoven into the fabric of our being. Deep down you wonder if he tells you that on purpose, because he believes that something just like that led you to each other.
That afterthought keeps coming back to you whenever you’re together. Even now, as the mattress dips under his weight by your side, and you feel like maybe all of it, the lows and the ups, were meant to led you both here.
And maybe you do want him to remember what you impulsively uttered, right before your bodies became one yet again…
“I’m glad I gave you that key.”
He exclaims out of blue, pulling you out of your thoughts. And smiles right in your face, all smug like the sun itself, like he was right all along. And most likely, he was. He always fucking is.
You snort half-slyly.
“Of course you’re glad. I warmed your sheets for free. You’re welcome.”
“Free? Come on, I paid you back with all the interest.” He frowns first, but sighs right after when he notices that you’re trying to stifle a laugh at his genuine offence.
He cups your jaw in his rough hands then, and you inch closer instantly taking the opportunity to climb on top of him.
You’re always so damn difficult, but that’s fine. Nothing he cannot handle.
Though it doesn’t help that you look so beautiful in the soft light cast by his nightstand lamp... Maybe they still have them at that one store from the mainland. He should probably buy another one now, for symmetry’s sake. And for you too.
Cause he could watch you all day in this damn light. Your illuminated skin feels soft underneath his fingertips, curves defined by time and the way you’re positioned. Sat on top of him, like a sculpture just for him to admire. Like he got the best seat at a venue.
He never admitted it out loud but when you’re above him... it actually might be his favourite place to be. It makes him hard all over again, but there’s still time for that.
In moments like these he wishes he could grasp you whole, make himself bigger just so he could embrace you completely, hide your sensibility from the cruel world you were both born into. He’s been through a lot in his life, and he knows you can handle just as much, but still he’d do anything and more to protect both Ali and you.
Your more delicate fingers are a big contrast to his rather sturdy facial features when your hands reach to caress his face.
In your eyes, he looks regal, skin and hair are like peppered with threads of time and experience. He laughs when you tell him that he’s like „fine wine”. Mainly cause it’s cheesy, and he doesn’t really believe it most of the time. But you know the smile that comes after you say it.
He’s… happy with you. You make him feel better about life and himself, even if he didn’t admit it to you yet.
Feeling goosebumps on your skin when he draws mindless shapes on your back he decides to try his luck.
“Did you really mean it?”
Like a thunder, it rips through your spine. He heard your hushed confession. He remembered it.
“What do you mean?”
Play dumb, your mind prompts you. But really you just want him to say it back. So you know everything he’s done for you, everything he’s ever whispered into your hair, into your brain, was real. That you didn’t dream it.
With a long inhale beforehand, he speaks in a low tone.
„That you love me.”
The reality is simple as it is. Both of you crave confirmation, an assurance. That none of this is going away, that the other is just as much in love.
For Hassan it’s harder to admit out loud. His thoughts are often dark, he’s already experienced love and loss, he feels grief everyday. And he didn’t expect happiness again. In reality, he’s been mentally preparing himself for a lonesome and grim aging full of regret.
And yet, life slowly becomes brighter with you. It gets easier each day and there’s no denying of that. He wants you in his life.
You whisper back shakily.
„Yeah. I do.”
His lips curl into a small smile. A smirk almost.
„You just want a gratuitous fuck every once in a while, that’s what it is.”
This old fucking bastard. You’re ready to stand up but he sits up and locks you in place, with his arms intertwined behind your back.
„Hey, hey! Look at me! I was- well... trying to be funny like you. And besides, you know I would never mind even if you did. Especially since you always come for me so beautifully.”
You groan looking away, only it’s very difficult when he starts assaulting your chest with those plump lips of his. Kicking yourself mentally for the moan that just left your throat on its own (to his clear satisfaction), you give in and lock your gaze with his once more.
And it’s like seeing affection personified. Even his brows, with that bloody hot cut going through one of them, look apologetic and soft. Only for you.
“I know I’m no fun most of the time, but that’s why I’ve got you.” He speaks slightly louder now, in his signature honey dipped tone that makes your thighs tremble. In fact he has a firm grip on them right now, relishing every little reaction of your body to his words. Feeling what’s invisible to the naked eye.
“And I want you to know, that I think…” A deep breath and he looks into your eyes again. “I love you too.”
You eyes well up, but so do his. Fingers tearing through the dense forest of his beard, you cup his jaw and lean forward slowly. The kiss itself is like a stamp now, like your signatures combined. An oath signed by your pledges.
Suddenly he pulls away and both of you groan in dismay.
„Okay no crying on my watch.” His fingers swiftly gather the tears that alredy started reaching your cheeks.
Next, you feel him shift underneath you, like he’s getting impatient.
Truthfully speaking he is, and so are you. He’s been on your mind almost all day, and now you know that the feelings have been mutual all along.
As you shift over his lap, Hassan growls.
„You want me again?”
You decide that you love it when he speaks to you in this tone. Authority dripping like lliquor. Savory and sweet. Sharpened by cigarette smoke and peppermint. And yet, rich as milk.
„I always do.” His cock twitches between your legs at your response. When you move over him, positioning yourself on your knees, spreading yourself open, right above the already swollen head, he swallows with a clear bob of his Adam’s apple. „But this time - it’s my treat.”
~~~~~
#hassan el shabbaz#sheriff hassan#sheriff hassan x reader#hassan el shabbaz x reader#midnight mass imagine#midnight mass fic#midnight mass fanfiction#midnight mass smut#im honestly in shambles so please bear with me here 🤧#FEEDBACK IS ALWAYS WELCOME IN THIS HOUSEHOLD!!#full fic#my fics
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Hi💖Can u pls write like steve rogera x reader, where steve got badly hurt in a mission and end up lossing his memory and forget about his wife(reader) and his marriage reader tries to help him remind.. lot of angst with a happy ending please..💗
Reminisce
Steve Rogers x Reader
Warnings: language, mistakes, shitty plot, kinda idiot Steve (not really) a Lil bit of angst...
A/N: thank you nonnie for the ask and I'm sorry it took me so long :') and still, it's shitty...
Word Count: 2.8k
master-list.
~
You ran towards the infirmary with tears running down your face. It might be an overreaction to someone else considering how he would be just fine but you knew he was hurt. You had a weird feeling before he even went on that mission, a restlessness inside you that you couldn’t express.
The sight made you stop breathing for a moment. “Oh Steve” you whispered seeing your husband laying on the bed embraced by the wires. The right side of his face was swollen, bruised, and a nasty cut on the left side towards his lips.
He was still unconscious. Doctor Cho came out of the room. You rushed towards her.
“How’s he?” your voice, hoarse because of crying.
She sighed and looked at you with sympathy. “Can’t say anything till he becomes conscious. But you can meet him now” she said with a smile before walking off.
You entered his room with shaky legs and sat near him. He looked tired, a frown covering his face that you wanted to smooth out with your fingers. But you were too afraid to touch his injured face, your heart cleaned seeing him like that.
putting your hand on his while resting your head on the space on the bed, a fresh tear escaped your eye.
--------
You woke up feeling a hand jerking away from yours. You sat up and looked at a confused Steve.
“Hey, it’s okay,” you said trying to comfort him but he looked panicked. You went outside to call the doctor.
Steve was trying to free himself from the wires when you got back. You ran towards him to stop him.
“Hey, relax babe” you put your hands on him, causing him to stop. But before he could utter a word the doctor came in.
“Good morning captain rogers.” she greeted cheerfully coming towards him to check him up.
“What happened to me” was what he said.
The doctor kept checking his injuries. “You got severely injured on the mission. Kept everyone worried especially this lady here” she smiled, pointing towards you.
Steve frowned, his hurt hurting like hell. “What mission?” he didn’t remember going on any mission and why would you be worried about him.
“You shouldn’t be worried about me agent y/l/n”
Both you and doctor Cho exchanged looks at his words. This was getting serious.
Doctor Cho sighed and signaled you to follow her. You left a confused Steve behind and followed her.
A frown covering her face, “I think you have an idea what is happening to him.” she said, sympathy in her eyes for you.
Yes, you knew but didn’t want to accept it. When you didn’t reply she sighed explaining it to you. “He is having amnesia, most probably retrograde amnesia where he can’t remember things before the injury. We can’t say what he remembers what he doesn't but by the looks of it I think he doesn’t remember you are his wife”
“Yeah I know, he called me agent” it came out ruder than you anticipated but she understood your anger even though it wasn’t her fault.
“We will have to do CT scans to know how severe the damage is. And maybe he is going to heal soon because of the serum” she placed her hand on your shoulder. Her words soothe your worry a little bit.
“And you could help him heal too, it wouldn’t be easy though. You have to be careful not to overwhelm him with too much information” saying this she left, probably preparing for the CT scans.
With a sigh, you returned to the room. Steve was still sitting on the bed with his head in his hand. You sat down beside him, patting his shoulder gently so he wouldn’t get scared.
The soft eyes he gave you, reminded you of the time he came out of the ice. When you were assigned to guide him to cope with his new life. He had the same look when he was trying to understand how to use a smartphone and then looked at you with confusion, silently pleading for help.
He was asking for help again but this time you weren’t enjoying this, you were scared. What if he never…
“What’s the last thing you remember?” you asked softly.
“The last mission I remember is with you Nat and Rumlow, to free the hostages. But we came back, reported to fury, and then went home. That’s it” that was two years ago, a month before you two started dating.
So he doesn’t even remember us dating. You thought.
“Steve, I know it would be difficult to understand, to accept but what you remember happened two years ago.” you didn't know how much to tell him before he started to panic but for now he looked okay. Trying to take in the information.
You took the ring beside the table, they took it off his finger and showed him. “Um.. this is” you were hesitant to tell him but it was important. You showed him your hand with the wedding ring.
“We got married,” you whispered looking at him, trying to read his expressions.
You knew how emotional he was about his relationships, and suddenly knowing he was married would be a shock.
Steve took your hand in his and caressed the finger as if trying to remember but there was nothing.
Nothing, he could think off and smile. It was a bit painful to know you are married and not know anything about it. That day, your life with that person.
“Hey, it’s okay. You are going to be fine. We are going to retrieve everything back” you said his face in your hands.
You didn't know how you were going to do that or how much time would it take but right now it was important to give him hope.
He nodded and got out of your grip. Suddenly the doctor came in to take Steve for CT scans.
His ring was still in your hands, you didn’t give him, nor did he ask for it…
~
You brought Steve to your floor after the CT scans. You cleaned the bedroom especially for him considering how difficult you find cleaning your room.
There was an awkward silence between you two. You never felt this way with him even when you two didn’t start dating.
“You should change and take a rest, I’ll bring you dinner” you smiled to which he just nodded and watched you go.
It wasn’t that he didn’t like you anymore. He did like you, and with what he remembers he was thinking of asking you out but suddenly you are his wife and…
His head hurts thinking about that, so he laid on the bed thinking this all to be a dream.
~
You went to the kitchen where everyone was eating and talking. When they saw you coming they stopped and stared at you.
“I’m just here to make dinner for him. His head hurts constantly, I think he is thinking too much” you sighed. The team gave you sad smiles.
“It’s gonna be alright y/n,” nat said, coming towards you. She hugged you before you started making something for your husband.
You came back with a bowl of soup and saw him lying in bed with closed eyes but you knew he wasn’t sleeping. You sat near him and ran your fingers through his hair causing him to open his eyes. You smiled at him.
“I brought you soup, you have to take your medicines after that.” again just a nod and he took the bowl from you.
You got up and continued watching him, no glance at you, no smile, nothing. You knew you had to be patient but it still hurts seeing him behaving like a stranger.
With a sigh, you went to the bathroom to change for bed…
~
It’s been 3 weeks since lost his memories and you were trying very patiently to help. You were always there for him, wake him up with a smile, usually, you would kiss him but now everything stopped as he was distant from you. But now things were a little bit better as he would often give you a little smile. You made him his favorite food. You took him for walks and to dinner, where you two had memories.
Yesterday you took him to the restaurant where you went on your first date. You were noticing his expressions the whole time if he would get a spark of his past but there was nothing. And even if he felt something he didn’t show it. He barely showed any expressions now.
Today you were going to take him to the central park, that was where you took him first when he came out of the ice.
You personally had a lot of memories there with your family.
Maybe if you talked about the same things you did that day, that could cause an effect on him.
You sighed happily and went down the floor, to find him. He was on desk duty these days, which was funny. Considering the captain who always gave everyone else that pathetic job as a punishment, was doing it himself. And that everyone was mostly you, the favorite target of Steve Roger’s wrath.
You went towards his desk but didn’t find him there. So after asking FRIDAY you were heading towards the laboratory.
You were about to enter but stopped hearing their voices.
“I don’t know tony. It’s not like I don’t like her but…. She is being too much for me. She is always there, when I wake up I see her face, on breakfast lunch dinner. Then going to bed. And now she is taking me outside. It’s… so overwhelming.” Steve sighed.
Normally Steve Rogers didn’t babble his tensions out when anyone asked him what happened. But now when tony asked this question he couldn’t help but let out everything he was thinking for the past three weeks.
Tony gave him a sympathetic smile, “maybe you should talk to her then. Tell her she needs to give you space. She isn’t like that, Steve, she is worried too and maybe that’s why she didn’t even realize that.”
Steve considered his words and indeed before going out of the laboratory. You on the other hand left before he could.
Here you were trying so hard to help him get back to normal and he was taking you, as too much.
You marched towards your room and packed your stuff. Maybe you should shift back to your floor giving him his space back.
Well, you were being too much y/n. You thought. But for him, and if he had any problem he should have talked directly to you.
You sighed. He was normal with everyone but you, or maybe everyone was normal with him but you.
You took your bag and went back to the other floor. Now you also would try to be normal, acting as if nothing happened and wait for some miracle to heal him.
After making your old bedroom look presentable you decide to head towards the gym to let out your frustrations. But on the way you found Steve, who had the audacity to smile at you.
“Umm… I was looking for you,” he said softly. This made you even more annoyed. He was acting as if he didn’t bitched you to your friend just half an hour ago.
“Why?” he flinched at your tone which wasn’t meant to be that harsh.
“We were supposed to go for a walk” you sighed and gave him a forced smile.
“Not today Steve. I am a bit tired.” you were about to walk away but stopped.
“And Steve, I think we should stop this for some time. It must be overwhelming, huh, you know I can be too much sometimes,” you whispered the last part. He barely caught it but he heard. And watched you walk away.
~
One week passed and he was restless. You weren’t there, he barely saw you the whole day. He couldn’t even sleep at night. It wasn’t just because of the guilt of his words, it was your presence that soothes him, your warmth. Even though his mind didn’t remember his body was used to being around you.
He was in the kitchen making coffee for everyone when you walked in. and it hurt him when you didn’t even look at him and started preparing your breakfast.
“Hey, your coffee,” Steve said, passing a cup towards you.
“Steve she doesn’t drink black coffee-like, everyone” nat said looking at him.
Steve shocked his head, “no I didn’t make her—” he stopped in the middle of his sentence.
You looked towards your cup and it was filled with cream and an outrageous amount of sweetness, just like you loved your coffee.
You looked towards Steve who was giving you a nervous smile, while everyone remained silent. “Thank you” you muttered and walked out with your cup.
With a smile and happy tears in your eyes, he subconsciously made you a coffee. He remembered.
Still, that didn’t mean you are going to be on friendly terms with him.
~
The mission was successful but tiring, you were returning in the jet with Tony nat and clint. Sitting in a corner you smiled lightly thinking about the moments before going to the missions.
Steve came to you, “be safe” that’s what he whispered before giving you a peck on the cheek, hesitantly. As if you would slap his face hard for kissing you.
You chuckled before closing your eyes to take a nap…
~
He was sitting at the desk doing his work when Sherline? What was her name? Came to him with a more than a friendly smile. She was a new receptionist always needing help with stuff especially when Steve is around. She bent down when you walked in with a file on the mission.
Not again… that was what you thought. You knew what he must be on his display by the flustered face and the way he was averting his eyes.
He smiled hesitantly before trying to explain whatever that recipient girl was asking him.
“Captain Rogers” you called, with authority causing both of them to look at you. The girl instantly straightened and walked away before greeting you. Your eyes followed her as she went away before coming back to him.
The look of disappointment you gave him, reminded Steve of a memory, somewhere deep inside his head.
“Captain Rogers” your voice was stern as you looked at Sharon and then Steve. She was there for some work Fury asked her to do, and also got a chance to see Steve as well. You were annoyed from a hectic mission after a week to submit your report and seeing them together annoyed you even more.
“Hey y/n” Sharon greeted with a smile which you returned with your forced one. You marched towards steve and threw your file on the desk.
“Report,” you said before walking away.
With the same look of disappointment, you came near him and threw your file. Steve looked like a kicked puppy when he looked up.
“Report” the voice seemed like it was coming from a distance. He was watching you go away and involuntarily called your name.
“y/n” he kept calling but you didn’t stop. He left Sharon there and ran towards you. He grabbed your arm, causing you to turn. “What?” you spat…
He remembered, he remembered what he said after that, your wrist in his hand and you, still thinking what the fuck he wants?
“Will… will you go out with me” the words left his mouth. He suddenly smiled looking at your expressions. Your eyes got wet, while you chuckled.
“You..”
“Just a little bit” he whispered.
He took your hands in his, “look y/n I’m sorry about those words. I was just” but you stopped him. “I understand,” you smiled sadly. “Doctor Cho warned me not to be overwhelmed. I just got too much, I know”
“Will you give me another chance, will you help me with this?” he asked.
“Of course babe,” you said before giving him a long-overdue hug. It felt so good to feel him against you after so long, his arms wrapped around you. Now he felt like your husband.
“Now can you give me my ring back?” he said, showing you his empty hand.
“Hmm, lemme think about it. Think if you even deserve it or not” you said squinting your eyes at him.
He pretended to be wounded at your words only to receive a scoff from you. You turned and walked away leaving him there alone.
“Buy me dinner first, then I’ll decide” you shouted behind you, causing the captain to smile shyly.
#chris evans x reader#steve rogers x reader#chris evans#captain america#steve rogers#marvel#captain america x reader
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American Pie
Lee Bodecker x Reader
Word Count: 4.8k
Summary: The Summer heat gets to everyone, including Sheriff Lee Bodecker who is looking to stir up with his favorite girl.
Warnings: 18+ only!!! DubCon (!!!), Dark themes, age gap (reader is early 20s), infidelity, alcohol abuse, exhibitionism, unprotected sex, spanking.
A/N: I didn’t expect to finish this in one night, but I did! I may have missed a few things to include in the warnings but I believe I got all the major ones. Enjoy!
Hot weather makes people feel more rowdy, like they can do anything just because the temperature is rising and the sun is out for longer. When the number of troublemakers at the bar goes up, so does the number of visits from the police.
Someone was always anonymously calling the police because someone at Tecumseh Lounge was stirring up some shit. They rarely came and when they did they did nothing. The deputy they dispatched would just write down a few things in a notepad and leave. No one ever truly got in trouble and that's because the Sheriff is rumored to be "in'' with the owner.
The rumors are true but the nice ladies and gentlemen from the nicer parts of the county will never see it for themselves. Tecumseh is rough, and nasty. There were more vices here than just alcohol, and most of it was done under the table.
Y/n was crazy to take this job as a bartender at Tecumseh. She didn't know that a hidden prospective for the job was fucking the patrons. One of the other girls working here did it, and so did Sandy despite her brother being the sheriff. Y/n was not interested in the advances pressed on her by the men. They were either married or been fucking "ladies of the night" for years and probably have something. No one who frequented a place like Tecumseh wasn't someone Y/n wanted to go home with. Yet she let Sandy's brother talk to her in any kind of way.
For someone who was the sheriff, Lee Bodecker was here a lot and it wasn't because the drinks were good. Sometimes his sister served him while he interrogated her about her husband Carl. Y/n had seen Carl a few times and she found him to be sleazy. Poor Sandy was stuck working behind the bar while Carl flirted with a younger girl just a few feet away from her. But Sandy would also take some patrons out to the back and get fucked when her shift ended. It seems like an even deal, but the difference is Carl looks happy doing it and Sandy always comes back looking a mess, and not in a good way.
Y/n has been applying for a waitressing job closer to her house. She wants out of this place yet whenever she says Tecumseh is her current place of work, her application gets thrown out. Her aunt got her the job and she wished to god that woman never did. She should've gone and worked at someone's farm doing hard labor instead of accepting the offer to work. She was talked to like she was a whore and there was nothing to do about it because her boss did the same thing.
Friday night shifts are the hardest for her. The men drink harder because they don't work weekends. The influence of alcohol made them relentless when talking to Y/n. They made what they believed were compliments about her body and proclaimed how they wanted to fuck her. She just had to press a smile because the more they found her fuckable the more they tipped her. The low-cut top she wore was not coincidental. While she didn't fuck patrons for 20 dollars, she did put out for their attention.
Not even 30 minutes before her shift and a fight breaks out. She has to call the police because the fight between two men turned into a fight of three, four, and then five. No one looked interested in breaking up the fight, just watching with glib smiles and jovial laughs. This was the kind of entertainment they came for, but it was a pain to deal with as a barmaid.
Police sirens and the lights made some patrons, including two of the people involved in the fight, went running out through another exit. Their fears were pointless since it was rare for anyone to get arrested here.
"Alright break it up," Deputy Brooks' voice boomed.
Whenever an officer was called to come down to Tecumseh Lounge, it was only three policemen who showed up: Deputy Brooks, Deputy McConnell, and the sheriff. They must've worked out some kind of deal with her boss because they come in, don't do shit about the reason they were called for, and they never failed to ask for a drink before leaving. Tonight is no different; they just break up the fight and tell the men to leave but they never force perpetrators to leave.
The fight dissipated a few minutes after the deputies showed up and the patrons grumbled because the fun was over. The two deputies looked around the place to give off the appearance of holding authority then they made their way over to the bar.
"One of your coldest beers," Deputy Brooks didn't greet Y/n nor was he polite. He just demanded what he wanted.
"No free drinks." She tries to keep her tone of voice strong. She is not afraid of these two men who only feel powerful because they have a badge on them. Deputy McConnell was only a few years older than her and she remembers when he was a scrawny kid who got picked on even as a senior in high school.
"We just broke up a fight at your fine establishment. The least you can do is give us a beer," Brooks rebuttal.
There was no arguing so Y/n sighed and went to grab two beers for the men so they could just get out of her sight.
"I need two beers. Not just one," McConnell interjected. Y/n didn't like how they drank on the job, especially since they were going to be driving so late at night.
But Y/n obliges just to get them out of her face. She hates the smug look on Deputy Brooks face as he grabs his beer and walks out with the other deputy behind him.
The rest of the night is Jenny's problem because Y/n was clocking out immediately. She smelled like cigarettes and just wanted to wash the layer of sweat off of her body. All the money her boss accrues from shady dealings, he was too cheap to install an air conditioner. People get angry and agitated when it's so hot out. Even at night the air feels sticky and falls just to the low 80s.
She headed out the back to avoid the incoming patrons. She is fair game to some people now that she is single.
Out back she can hear three unmistakable voices. Deputy Brooks and McConnell were standing by their car that was parked right next to the nice, clean sheriff's car. Y/n is not in the mood to deal with the two dickheads and their boss sheriff dickhead, but she knows they are going to say something to her as she walks back.
"Well if it isn't my pretty, pretty Cherry."
Lee Bodecker's voice punctuated the night air, making even the humid atmosphere feel cold.
Y/n stops in her tracks, knowing that she cannot avoid this without causing trouble for herself.
"Don't call me that."
"You sure like the name last week when I had my head between those thighs. 'Lee...oh Lee!" He imitated her voice which made his deputies laugh. Lee has a beer in his hand, reminding Y/n that McConnell asked for two back at the bar. She should've known it was for Lee.
She was embarrassed by him talking about their time together in front of his subordinates. Lee is married and Y/n is turned off by men with gold bands on their ring finger who try to take her home after her shift ends. However they have fucked on multiple occasions, making him the only patron she has given into. He was mean, but authoritative. Y/n couldn't help herself and she sometimes let the sheriff rough her up in the back of his car.
"I'm only messing with you sweetheart. You don't gotta stand there lookin like you saw a ghost."
Y/n feels humiliated but Lee doesn't seem to care. Lee gets off on seeing her squirm, on seeing her be degraded. She's not a whore like the other woman who works here and his sister, but he fucks her like she is. He has something many of the men inside the dingy joint wanted. Y/n isn't easy, which rare for a female Tecumseh worker.
"I'm just wonderin if you seen my Sandy," he made an attempt to change the subject.
"She's your sister Lee."
The truth is Y/n hasn't seen Sandy in a week. She said something about her and Carl taking a trip but she didn't say for how long. Y/n is not too fond of Sandy to pry into her life. She feels bad for her though. She always comes into work with dingy hair and not to mention the amount of weight she has lost which makes her face look gaunt.
"You better address me as ‘sheriff’ girl. You have no manners. You weren't even going to say hello to the men who keep you safe."
Lee did nothing to make her feel safe. He made Y/n feel on edge when he was around but downright euphoric when she was in the throes of passing in the back of his car. He was just using her to get his rocks off and he only went after her because he wanted someone "fresh" for him. He doesn't respect her or care for her.
"Shouldn't you three be patrolling? Looking for crime?"
"Don't catch an attitude, Y/n. It's none of your business what we do. Besides, all the crime is in that building you just came out of."
"You guys never do shit. All you do sheriff is come and collect money from Leroy-"
"Watch your fucking mouth."
Y/n is not sure why she's still here trying to bump heads with him. She will never win, especially when he is the authority around here. No one challenged Lee because they were scared to death of him. He's a shady sheriff but he's feared.
"I'm leaving," Y/n sighed. She tried to walk away but Lee stood up from leaning on his car and grabbed her arm
"Uh-uh," he shook his head at her as the grip on her arm tightened. She looked up at him with fear in her arms and he felt his cock getting hard "You don't get to leave until I tell you too. I think you owe me for last week anyway, cherry."
"Please...just let me go," she tried to plead. She tried to plea to the man who she's been fucking, hoping that his attachment to her would make him be kinder to her.
"You need your ass to be put in place. I thought I did that a few weeks ago when I spanked your ass until you cried, but you're still as defiant as ever. You'll never fucking learn."
Lee dragged her back to his car and bent her over the hood. He placed her arms behind her back and cuffed her. He wasn't going to arrest her but making her believe he was sure was fun to him.
She can see both of the deputies watching her. Her face was planted against the top of his car as he held her down. Lee pulls her dress over her ass and she feels so exposed.
"Those panties look damp to me. What do y'all think?"
Y/n hears the deputies chattering lowly amongst themselves, probably afraid to say something obscene about the woman the sheriff is hooking up with.
"How many men seen you like this before? Who you let fuck you today?"
"No one sheriff."
"That's right. That pussy is mine."
His rough hand caresses her ass. He wants to spank her for talking back to him in front of the two younger officers. She was trying to embarrass him which called for a punishment.
"You better count 'em or I'll start over."
Y/n just groaned in anticipation of the first blow to her ass. She hates how Lee takes his time and she wishes he would just get it over with. Her heart is racing as Lee gets a firm grip on her hair.
"Bad little girls get their asses spanked. Don't think just because you're not peddling your cunt that you're not a whore," he threatened with anger.
Her panties were ripped off with rage and she was truly exposed. The warm, summer breeze ghosted across her cunt but it made her shiver. She can already feel the heaviness of her hand on her ass before it even comes down. The first smack was so loud that it pierced the dark night's air. Her cry was even louder.
"One," she says breathlessly. Her eyes close so she doesn't have to look at the two men staring at her with wide eyes and tents in their pants.
Lee believes pain is the best discipline for a girl like Y/n. He would never do this to his wife, but he also doesn't fuck his wife like he fucks Y/n. She was a tough thing to crack but she rides him into the night until his car is shaking and he's cumming into a condom.
"You can count louder than that, cherry."
He was mocking her only because they had an audience. The belittling and having her body exposed was humiliating. But that first slap of her ass sent all the blood in her body rushing to pussy.
Lee smacked her ass again and again and each time she pathetically sobbed out the number of hits her ass has received so far. Her skin felt hot and it wasn't because of the temperature. She wanted to cry so bad but she kept it. She has never cried in front of Lee and she isn't going to start now; no matter how painful his brutality is.
"Look how fucking wet she is from getting her ass whooped."
Y/n heard the shuffling of the deputies and there was not doubt they were looking at her glistening sex. She felt like she was dripping and she wanted to press her thighs together so bad to hide herself. That would only make things worse for her and the last thing she needs is a harsher punishment.
"Learned your lesson, cherry?"
She nods, her eyes still closed.
"Good girl."
The sound of Lee's belt coming undone makes her stick her ass higher into the air. She's been trained like a dog who wants a treat to behave this way. A sense of shame consumes her as she acts so shamelessly.
"My good little bitch," he coos. He pulls himself out and lines up the head with her wet slit. "I don't have a condom on me sweetheart. I finally get to feel that pussy of yours."
He was lying. He always kept a pack of condoms in the glove compartment of his patrol car because he couldn't bring them into his home. Plus having them in there would always leave him ready to fuck Y/n. He did not like the feeling of condoms but he can't knock her up when next year is an election year. Having a bastard child with a barmaid from Tecumseh would fuck everything up and send his efforts down the drain.
"Lee no! You have to use a condom."
"I don't have to do anything."
She's stupid to think he would listen to her. She is completely powerless and can only operate to his whims.
"Then please pull out...please," she whispers in defeat. The laugh he lets out tells her that she doesn't get a say in this at all.
Lee pushes on her back with one hand and the other is holding onto her hip. He finally sinks into her and he is in paradise.
"You expect me to pull out when your cunt is this warm and tight? No fucking chance darlin'"
He starts to fuck into her, each thrust earning him a pathetic moan. She feels so good wrapped around him and he vows to never wear condoms with her again. She's the tightest thing he's had in years and he has to go slowly to brace himself or else he is gonna cum. This position gave him so much access to her cunt and he pushed in as deep as he could. His bare head was kissing her cervix over and over again. His thighs slapped against her bare ass and the noise reverberated into the night.
The deputies just stood there; eyes wide with shock but lust filling their veins. They never took Lee as a cheater yet he fucked Y/n he knew her body so well.
Tears slip down her face, but they aren't from sadness or anger. She's overwhelmed by the pleasure Lee is giving her that she can almost forget that they have an audience.
Lee lifted her head off of the hood of the car. She could see them in the reflection. She looked a mess while Lee looked like he was in heaven in her bare cunt.
"You wanna tell them how you never had a man in your ass until I fucked you? Begged for it like a whore?"
His voice has some much grit in it and Y/n wondered where this new fire in him came from. Lee was rough with her but never has he pounded into her like she was just a toy. Most would be surprised to know that Lee can be a gentle lover that had a primal urge to be inside of Y/n. She wondered if he was like that with his wife, but according to him she was just a "wet blanket." Y/n does not know whether or not to believe him because it's not uncommon for men to disparage their wives to women they're having sex with on the side.
"Gonna cum Lee," she cried.
He felt her tighten around him and he was about to cum too. He was going to cum inside of her.
"Show 'em how you cum for me. Let 'em see that pretty face of yours."
Lee pounded into her until she was crying out. Her orgasm wrecked her body and the only thing on her mind was Lee and his cock. If she was asked to speak right now it would just be babble. He fucked her stupid and he's not going to stop until he spills inside of her.
A few more hard, rough thrusts and Y/n feels Lee spill inside of her. She sighs at the blissful sensation. His grip on her loosens, a symptom of the exhaustion that starts to set in. His cock begins to soften inside of her but the two of them are still panting from what they just did.
"Go on. Go home," he slaps her ass one last time just to tease her. His eyes are trained on the sight of his cum oozing out of her and he never wants to look at anything else. But he has a shift to get back to
Y/n reluctantly stands up, her dress falling over her ass to cover her up. She can feel his cum running down her thigh but she's too embarrassed to clean herself up in front of these mean. She accidentally catches Deputy McConnell's eyes before she scurries off to her car. She hears a laugh and then a few more joining in. She's sure Lee is bragging to them about her always being willing to fuck him. She just hopes he doesn't tell them everything they have done together.
-
Lee had been silent for more than a week now. No calls, no visits to the bar, and even his patrol car hadn't ridden down her street. Y/n felt insecure about his absence; like he thought she was an easy slut like the rest of the barmaids. He knows she isn't willing to fuck anybody, but she was not sure if he believed her when she said it.
The days moved so slowly as she watched the door hoping he would come in one late night. She even hoped for a fight but suddenly no one had the energy anymore for a melee.
Y/n was working a late shift tonight. She'd cover the bar from 12 until last call. It was her day off but she had to fill in for some girl at the last minute. If it had been the weekend she would've said no, but it's a Tuesday night which means it would be an easy night of minimal work.
Y/n was wiping down glasses not five minutes after she clocked in and she heard the shrill voice of her co-worker Sydney.
"I'm not dealing with him. Last time I tried to cut him off he threatened to arrest me! I don't know where Sandy is but she needs to be the one here to deal with her brother."
Y/n's ears perked up. She didn't notice Lee in the room when she walked in. The room was dim and it was not always easy to make out customers, especially if they were far away.
"What's going on?"
Y/n walked over to where Cindy's voice was coming from and she was talking to their boss Leroy.
"Sheriff is drunk off his ass and I'm supposed to deal with him. My shift ended five minutes ago and once I'm off the clock then anything that happens in this place is none of my concern!" She said with contempt.
"You work for me. You don't get to decide what you will and will not do at my bar!"
As much as Y/n wanted to avoid a tiff between her co-worker and boss, she wanted to talk to Lee even more.
"I'll take care of it."
Leroy didn't care either way. As long as he didn't have to deal with Lee who was pissed off at him about something. Lee often complained that her boss was a "useless fucker." Leroy walked away from the two and Cindy gave Y/n a small smile.
"Thank you."
"It's no problem. I'll see you tomorrow Cindy," Y/n called to the blonde who was already peeling out of the place. She doesn't think Cindy likes her all that much but she was at least courteous to Y/n.
The bar was dead enough for Y/n's other co-worker to cover while she went to deal with Lee.
He was at a table in one of the corners of the bar; slumped over in his chair and too intoxicated to speak in complete sentences. There was no way he could properly function or drive home. She had a choice to make whether to leave Lee like this or take him home. She had just gotten to work, but the night was nothing that her co-worker couldn't handle. If Leroy threw a fit and tried to fire her she could just get Lee to threaten him.
He was so heavy as he leaned on her to walk to her car. Y/n loathes this man yet she does so many caring things for him that it makes her stomach hurt. She gets nothing out of this exchange yet she continues to go back with him.
She placed him in the passenger seat of her car and he just mumbled to himself the entire ride to her apartment. She was thankful to be on the first floor because it would be a hazard to try to get Lee to walk up some stairs like this. She helped him sit on her raggedy couch. He looked like he was going to vomit.
"How many drinks did you have?" She began her interrogation on him, but she doubts she will get a coherent answer tonight.
"Just one."
As he spoke he reached into his pocket to show her the "one" bottle that he drank from tonight. A few candy wrappers fell out of his pocket when he pulled the bottle out. They were jolly ranchers wrappers which was the kind she bought to share with him.
"What happened? Why did you get so fucked up? I need to get you home Lee."
Y/n was in panic mode. There was no way she could take Lee home but she didn't know how to deal with him like this. He had been tipsy around her before, sure, but she has never seen him this drunk.
"No, no...don't wanna go back. Just let me sleep it off," he slurred. He haphazardly kicked his shoes off and pulled his jacket off so he could get comfortable on her couch. He's going to wake up with a sore back if he sleeps on that thing.
"You can't get drunk like this ever again. And you also can't stay the night here ever again. Your wife is going to find out one day
He just groaned and turned away from her on the couch. She just sighed in defeat. She will deal with him in the morning.
-
She feels the bed around 3 am. She could not sleep after leaving Lee in a state like that on her couch and she has been up ever since. Y/n was so tired but her body was not agreeing with sleep at the moment. Heavy arms wrapped around her as she held her breath.
"You smell so good, Florence. Just like roses."
"Lee, it's me." She waited for him to respond, afraid that he would get upset or angry with her for no good reason. Her ego was a little hurt after he mistook her for his wife.
"I'm just jokin' with you cherry." Even though he was suffering from a hangover, he still has the capacity to tease her.
Y/n turned around to face him but he had his eyes closed and a pleased smile on his face. She can't deny how handsome he looks, especially with his full cheeks.
"Why did you get that drunk last night?"
"I'm a grown man."
"You weren't acting like it last night. You were like a defiant child," her voice began to rise in volume and Lee winced.
"Don't yell, please. You can be mad at me all you want but please don't yell. I've got a headache that's going to last for days."
"It's what you deserve."
Lee finally opened his eyes just so he could see that pouty look on her face. Y/n called him a defiant child, but she was one to talk. She was always acting like a brat around him.
"You don't mean that girl. If you did, you would've left me at Tecumseh. You care about me."
"Lee-"
"Just admit it. You care."
"Lee, you are married."
"What does that have to do with anything?"
This was the uncomfortable conversation Y/n wanted to have. It was always shot down by Lee. He had no problem fucking her, but talking about where they stand or his cheating was always a problem.
"Cherry, I wish you'd just let things be as they are. Wish you would always be a good girl like you are in the back of my cruiser."
"I don't want to be your mistress Lee. If we keep doing this then we're going to get caught and your wife will leave you. Then what?"
"I'll move you in and put a ringer on your finger. Maybe give you a few kids too," he chuckled.
Y/n couldn't bring herself to find joy in his comments. She has some underlying feelings for him and he's right, she does care. But her conscience can't stop thinking about the fact that he has a wife. The only time she forgets is when his dick is inside of her.
"I'm a whore, remember?"
"Just because I fucked you like one in front of my deputies doesn't mean you are one," his hand rested on her hot cheek and he stroked it with his thumb, "you're my cherry girl. The only person I love being inside of. You act like you hate me but you're always wet for me; I bet you're wet right now. I love what we have and I don't want it to end."
She has no more to say to him. She just sighs and closes her eyes. Lee can practically see the wheels turning in her head. While he saw this as a very simple situation, she viewed it as more complex and always seemed to look for ways to make it complicated for the two to just enjoy it for what it is. Y/n is young and Lee is sure she is not ready to settle down yet. They're just having some fun. And if they do in fact get caught and his wife leaves him, then his cherry would make one hell of a wife.
#lee bodecker#lee bodecker x reader#lee bodecker x ofc#lee bodecker smut#lee bodecker x you#lee bodecker x y/n#Sebastian Stan#lee bodecker fic#The Devil All The Time#Dark Fic
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Chasing After You
Summary: Matthew just can’t let you go, no matter how hard he tries. Unluckily, you have the same problem.
Player: Matthew Tkachuk
Word Count: 2000
Warnings: I don’t know... a lot of drinking. A few bad words.
Authors Note: Be gentle, this is the first thing I’ve written in a really long time. It might be (probably is) a dumpster fire.
You come over when your wine's all gone
Always catch me when I'm not that strong
Then you wind up staying all night long
Ain't nothin' new
Matthew had finally reached rock bottom, he had to admit that, though to no one other than himself. Sitting home alone on a Friday night. No game to play, no practice to keep his mind busy, no friends to hang out with. Just him, a beer, the temptation of something stronger, and nothing on the TV.
It was really pathetic. The guys wouldn't believe it if they saw him right now. Or maybe they would. Maybe pathetic was his new style, it was certainly starting to feel like it after all.
He grabbed the remote off the couch beside him and began to flip channels, eventually settling on a baseball game. He wasn’t paying close enough attention to the game to tell you the score, he wasn't sure he even knew what teams were playing.
Just a few minutes into the game that he was sort of watching, there was a knock on his door. He checked his watch, 10:34. You were earlier than usual.
He pushed himself up off the couch and made his way to the front door of his apartment. He knew it was you. You were the only one the front desk let up without calling him. He still didn't know how you had managed that. Did you sweet talk the workers? Probably.
He pulled the door open and there you were, bottle of wine in hand. “I finished one already, but I thought you might be open to having a drink with me.”
There were a thousand alarm bells going off in his head, but he stepped aside and let you into his apartment. You kicked off your shoes in the entryway and followed him into the living room. Neither of you bothered with grabbing glasses, you uncorked the bottle and took a sip before passing it to Matthew.
He knew where this was going, he always did. He couldn't tell you why he never stopped it. Or maybe he could. Maybe he knew and he didn't want to admit that even after everything you had done to hurt him over the years, he was still unbelievably, irrevocably in love with you.
Then I wake up with you on my chest
You got a way of making me forget
Girl, with you the answers always yes
Every time you call
He was warmer than usual. It took him a minute to register you in his arms, head positioned comfortably on his chest. The way you used to sleep almost every night but now reserved for nights that you’d downed your alcohol a little to quickly.
Matthew was afraid to move, he knew that as soon as he stirred you, you’d be out the door just as quickly as you'd walked through it the night before. Just like that you would burst his bubble all over again. Just like you had a hundred times before.
Eventually your eyes fluttered open and he watched as you scanned the room, taking in where you were. “Morning,” he said.
You smiled, “Morning.”
The smile gave him hope that he squashed down just as quickly as it appeared. “Stay for breakfast?” He asked.
You shrugged, “Do I have to cook it?”
“I’ll order in,” He laughed softly. He would never let you cook for him again if that was all it took for you to stay. It wasn't, but he could dream.
You nodded, “I’m going to take a shower. What time do you have practice?”
Matthew glanced at the clock on the bedside table. “I’ve got a few hours still.”
You pushed up off his chest and he immediately missed the warmth of your body. He wanted to tell you to come back, just for a little while longer but he knew better. So he let you go, because having you in his shower was better than having you in an uber on the way back to your apartment.
But I know, yeah I know it's a matter of time
'Till you walk, 'till you walk back out of my life
Leave me standing here lonely feeling like a fool
You stretched up on your tiptoes and pressed a kiss to Matthew’s lips. It was soft, barely there. “I’ll call you.”
He knew you wouldn’t.
He nodded, “Text me when you get home safe.”
You nodded. “I will.”
He knew you wouldn’t.
You turned away from him and he watched as you disappeared down the hallway toward the elevator. When he couldn't see you anymore, he pushed the door closed and made his way back to the living room.
Here he was again, a fucking idiot with a broken heart and nothing but time to kill.
Every time, every time you say we're done
You come back to the love you were running from
Don't know why, don't know why I let you but I do
Guess I love chasing after you
Matthew glanced down at his phone, tuning out the guys as he scanned the message, What are you doing tonight?
He typed out a response before anyone could realize who he was talking to. Nothing important.
Your response was almost immediate, I’ll be over in an hour.
Matthew rose from his seat and shoved his phone into his pocket. “Hey guys, I’ll catch you later.”
Johnny sighed, “Don't do it man, you're going to regret it.”
Matthew shook his head, “You have no idea what you're talking about.”
They looked at each other before turning back to him, “Man, this is getting ridiculous. She isn't good for you.”
“How do you know what's good for me?” Matthew asked, crossing his arms and widening his stance. “I think I can protect myself, I'm a big boy.”
Johnny sighed and waved a hand in his general direction, “Whatever, do what you want. Just don't come whining to me when she disappears again.”
Matthew snorted, “I don't plan on it.”
Then he was gone, phone in hand calling an uber.
Listen
Wish I could quit you but it feels too good
If I could turn it off, you know I would
But somethin' 'bout you makes me think we could
Make it after all
There was nothing in the world that made you angrier than your inability to walk away from Matthew. After everything the two of you had put each other through, there was no reason to keep going back. Yet… here you were. Standing outside his apartment after what was essentially a booty call.
You almost wished that Matthew would tell you to fuck off just so you could move on with your life. He wouldn't do that though, you knew Matthew too well and he knew you too well too. That was the problem. You had been with each other on some level for so long that you couldn't remember what it was like to be apart.
You hadn’t knocked yet, you could still leave. Go home and do the responsible thing for once.
“Y/N.”
You turned toward the elevators, and there was Matthew. He looked amazing, t-shirt tight over his chest and shoulders, hair just a little bit in his eyes, the way you loved. There was no chance that you were leaving now. You were in this for the night now, not that this was bad news. You had never intended on leaving without seeing him.
“You’re early.” He said, running his hands through his hair.
“Yeah, I know,” You said, “I was bored.”
He nodded, “I can fix that.”
But I know, yeah I know it's a matter of time
'Till you walk, 'till you walk back out of my life
Leave me standing here lonely feeling like a fool
Why did he always think it would be different? Why was he always so determined to let himself think that there was a chance things would work out this time or next time or the time after that. There was no logical reason to believe that after all this time, anything would change, yet here he was, once again, surprised on some level that you had left him high and dry.
He closed the door, you had long since disappeared into the elevators, and he collapsed onto the couch. There was no way he would be hearing from you again for a while, so he buried his face in the throw pillow and decided to take a long nap.
After all, he had gotten no sleep the night before.
Every time, every time you say we're done
You come back to the love you were running from
Don't know why, don't know why I let you but I do
Guess I love chasing after you
You were always the one to end things. You had never, in your life, had your heart broken. You never let things get that far. You loved love, but you hated the idea of being hurt. So you kept everyone who tried to love you at a distance. Matthew was no exception, in fact he was the blueprint. There was no way you could ever give him your whole heart, there was no way you could ever trust him with a part of you that you had never given to anyone.
Oh, but you wanted to. More than anything, you wanted to give him every part of you in every way. You knew he loved you, on some level you knew that he would never hurt you, but here you were, three years into a mess of your own creation with no idea how to fix it.
“Y/N, I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me.”
You glanced up from your hands, eyes scanning the massive wall clock hanging above your therapists desk. Your appointment would be over in twenty minutes and you had yet to say a word to her. “I don’t know where to start today.”
She nodded, “What is bothering you today? Let's start with that.”
You sighed, “Matthew.”
“What about him?” She asked, tapping her pencil on the notepad that rested on her crossed legs.
You resisted the urge to sigh again. “I just…” You looked down at your hands, “I wish that I could let myself be happy with him.”
You come over when your wine's all gone
Always catch me when I'm not that strong
Then you wind up staying all night long
Ain't nothin' new
Two firm raps on the door had Matthew freezing as he poured his drink. He set the bottle down and made his way to the living room. He pulled the door open and there you were, beautiful as ever. Hair pulled up in a messy bun, hands in the pocket of your coat. “Hey, Matthew.”
Matthew smiled his eyes wondering over you, memorizing every inch as he stepped out of the way to let you into the apartment. “No wine this time?”
“No, no wine tonight..”
He laughed as he pushed the door closed behind you. “It's okay, I have some.”
You kicked off your shoes by his front door before turning to face him. “Actually, I was thinking maybe we could try this sober tonight.”
Matthew stared at you, his expression some strange mix of confusion and hopefulness. “Why?”
You opened your mouth to respond, but no words came out. You wanted to tell him that you were working on your shit, that you were trying to be less scary and damaged, but you couldn’t find the words or the courage to share that with him. Instead, what came out of your mouth was a joke, “What, do you have to be drunk to enjoy my company?”
The corners of his mouth slowly turned up, “No, not at all.”
He followed you into the living room and took a seat beside you on the couch. Like always he gave you space. This time you scooted closer to him. His eyebrows rose for a split second, then he put an arm around your shoulders and grabbed the remote from the end table. “Want to watch a movie? I hear there’s some new Netflix original thats really good.”
You nodded and sank into his side as he scrolled through the selections.
Maybe this wasn't so scary.
Maybe you could get used to this.
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No one said Starks weren't a little dramatic
This is the first time I write Tony x daughter reader I hope you guys like it :)
Word Count: 2319 ( Things got a bit out of my hands while I was editing and eventhough it's edited I can't promise that there aren't any typos and I dtill wasn't satisfied with what I wrote but 🤷♀️Ig )
Warnings: Major character death, a lot of angst
Y/N loses her dad when he decides to save the universe with a snap of his fingers but when did anyone see a Stark not getting what they want? Let me answer for you, Never. ( AKA Y/N gambles with time and space and universes surprisingly there isn't any VA involved cause in my opinion they suck to save her dad but apparently there are always consequences)
Y/N had arrived at her destination albeit being a little late. She wanted to be there when the team tried to go back in time to get the Stones in hopes of saving aunt Tasha too but she had one and only shot at this so she had to make do with what she had. What she didn’t realise was she accidentally changed universes instead of going back in time.
The way she found out that the place she had arrived wasn’t when or where she intented to was Morgan, the little girl with big Brown eyes who had total control over her older sister the second they met. Y/N had to lay low and do her research before approaching them. But when she heard about Morgan she had to meet her before doing what she came to do. And that’s exactly what she did.
She found Morgan in a house by the lake with a woman who she assumed was Pepper.Her visit was short since she couldn’t afford getting caught by Pepper which would mean jeopardising the whole plan she had spent months making. She left a message for her dad before going off to save the man itself.
Her dad was fighting with Thanos when she arrived to the scene. The more she looked around the more it looked like the place she fought along with her dad and that meant one thing, she had to act quick.
‘’I am inevitable’’ Thanos said as he snapped his finger but nothing happened. Confused, he looked at his gauntlet to find that the Stones that were there a minute ago were no longer in their places. He looked around to see that Tony had them somehow.
‘’And I’m Iron Man’’ said Tony full of emotions as he was about to snap his fingers. He thought having all six Stones in his hands would kill him being a mortal and he was fine with it if that meant she could ensure his family’s security but he felt nothing. He thought he had died instantly but he found out that wasn’t the case when he got startled by an unknown voice.
‘’Oh, the hell with that!’’ said a girl who wore a similar suit to Tony’s. She seemed to appear out of nowhere. Which confused both man further.
‘’Who the hell are you?’’ asked Tony. Who the hell was mad enough decided to mess up the only chance of him stopping the big purple psycho of a man.
‘’Who do you think?’’ said the girl, winking at him confidentally but her eyes told a different story. There was sadness in them, grief and loss but it seemed like she was happy at the same time.What surprised him was the familiarity she carried but he couldn’t put his finger on it. So he searched her suit for some clues which led up to him finding the Stones. She was the reason he was not dead, she somehow got possession of the Stones.
‘’Kid, no!’’ yelled Tony. He attempted to get closer to her but she snapped her fingers before he could stop her. Everything stilled for a second. The other avengers thought Tony had done it as Thanos’ soldiers had started to turn to dust all of a sudden but when they found a girl that they’ve never seen before in the arms of Tony with fetal injuries they were puzzled. They gathered around Tony and the girl who struggled tos tay alive.
‘’I made it! I… I saved you, Dad.’’Tony was shocked at her words. He was processing what he heard as Pepper landed next to them and kneeled. They couldn’t Wrap their heads around what was happening but they both were not going to let a dying kid down for sure.
She had a difficulty breathing, she was in agonizing pain but she had a peaceful smile on her face. She tried to lift her hand but it pained her more, she whimpered. Tony sensed her intentions and put her hand on his cheek for her. He put his hand on top of her, gave it a gentle squeeze. ‘’Friday, what do we have?’’ asked Tony.
‘’3 to 4 degree burns from her right hand up to her face. Internal bleeding. Her lungs are collapsing... Life functions critical.’’ Answered the voice from both of the suits. Pepper grimaced, she didn’t know who this girl was but she had sacrificed herself for Tony, the man she referred ‘dad’. ‘’Who are you?’’ asked Pepper.
‘’I’m–‘’ she coughed, blood was pooling in her mouth. ‘’I’m surprised you couldn’t figure it out yet…’’ she let out a bloody laugh. ‘’I’m Y/N. Y/N Stark.’’ She said with her last breath. That shook the whole group to their cores. The girl wasn’t lying or confusing Tony with someone else. The girl who lied in his Tony’s arms nonbreathing was infact the daughter of Tony Stark. From the moment they realised the truth everything was a blur to the Stark Family and the avengers.
Y/N was Tony’s first daughter who had died in a cross fire 7 years ago. She was a teenager at the time. She would have been a few years older than Peter if she had lived. It was a wrong place wrong time type of situation, she had died on the scene. Tony had nightmares after that, his insomnia got worse. He had blamed himself although it had nothing to do with him. The guilt ate him alive day by day. He realised why the girl’s eyes were so familiar to him now, she was his Y/N/N. A grown, older version of her, but his Y/N nontheless.
He didn’t think he could recover from her death but losing her, seeing her die in his arms for the second time ruined him. He had no idea what was happening outside of his head, he was in a trance, he had stayed still looking at his hands where Y/N laid. Until his little girl, Morgan came up to him with a disk in hand and said ‘’Daddy! Daddy! A girl called Y/N wanted me to give this to you’’ That got everyone’s attention.
Tony told Friday to scan the disk and display whatever is in it. When he saw Y/N in front of her, he couldn’t stop the tears from falling and when she started speaking as if she could see her Tony lost it. He couldn’t hear her because of his own sobs, he didn’t even realised the rest of the avengers and his wife as they piled in the room when they heard Tony and Y/N’s voice. He had to stop the hologram a few times to gather himself. When he got control of his breathing, he built up his courage and displayed it all over again.
‘’Hey dad. I’m assuming since you are watching this I suceed. I’ve saved you.’’ She had to stop for a second to take a breath in to compose herself. ‘This time’ she said under her breath but Friday caught it.
‘’You are wondering how the hell I am alive. Well… For starters, I didn’t know that I was dead in this world which… makes you realise that I’m not from this world. I’m actually from what you call an alternative universe. Things got out of hand in my universe after… after you… Oh shit! This is too hard. I knew I couldn’t do this shit! I can’t even talk to my own god damn suit picturing it as my hypothetical dad without messing it up’’ that made a few people chuckle and a few others tos mile. The girl really was his father’s child after all.
‘’Okay I’m hoping you either won’t have to watch this or I can cut that part before giving it to Morgan. Anyways, I’m rambling.’’ Tony saw his younger self in Y/N which put a sad smile to his face. This was something he never got to experience before. To see her this grown up. To see a pieces of him in her.
‘’ So things went down hill after you did the whole ‘I’m Iron Man’ thing –which by the way I’m still mad at you about- You… You died in my hands, dad.’’ She gulped. She had begun crying a while ago but now that she was talking about her dad’s death, she felt like the lump in her throat got bigger and bigger, suffocating her. ‘’ I was all alone for years! You were all I had and then within a second you were gone! I didn’t have anyone else!’’ She tried to calm herself. She wasn’t recording this to make him feel guilty or get answers she was possibly never going to hear. This was a goodbye. A goodbye she knew he deserved just like how she did from him.
‘’That’s why I made the decision to change it but I accidentally changed universes instead of going back in time. But this was my only chance, only shot at making it right. And then I found out that I had died in this universe and you had moved on. Good for you, dad. I’m really proud of you. You did what I couldn’t. It was a relief to know that you were happy and that you had a family now. I thought for a second that maybe the blip didn’t happen. That in this universe, you had a lovely life and I thought for a second maybe I could be in it too. Stay with you but that hope was shortly lived.’’ She gave a sad smile.
‘’And now I’m about to go to the battle field. Before I go, I have to say, I don’t know how if there is any way for me to stop you. I can’t take it all back but I will do anything to not let another girl grow up without her dad. And I ain’t going to let my own sister down. Oh, did you know that I always wanted a sister?’’ she chuckled making Tony’s heart warm. It has been so long since he heard his daughter chuckle the damn way he does. She stopped for a second to think ‘’Well, she has the Stark charm, that’s for sure. I only knew her for a few hours and she had me the second we met. I wish I could be there for her as her older sister. I would give anything to see her grow up but if that has to be for only one of us to see, I’d rather that be you because I’ve been there. I know how hard it is to lose your dad. I could see clearly what she would have to go through and the moment I realised that I knew what I had to do. I would stop you at all costs and since this reacording is being played I could sleep peacefully knowing she has you.’’ She smiled with tears escaping her eyes once again. Tony was full of emotions. His daughter he has been longing for years was right in front of him but way too far away at the same time.
With a sigh she started ‘’ You have people you can hold on to. I never did. Pepper, Morgan, Rhodey, the spider kid... Hold on to them Tony. Hold on to the team. Oh, speaking of the team, tell them I love them and I missed them so badly. I’m sorry. I thought I was going to have more time to talk And maybe if a miracle happens and we all can manage to stay alive I could tell you all about it but I have to go now. Have an old man to save’’ She saluted and looked around right where the broken team of Avengers were with longing in her eyes. She moved closer to the disk to cut the recording but decided against it the last second. Tony hung his head, his heart broke to hear the hope in her voice when he knew what already happened. He thought this was the end of the recording but he looked up when he heard her talking and she had turned to him and looked right at him as if she knew where he was stated. That sent shivers up Tony’s spine.
‘’I know you think I made the wrong decision but I saved you. I refuse to let you down once again. I refuse to see you die in front of me once again. I’m not sorry for what I’m about to do, I knew the consequences when I made this plan months ago. I’m only sorry because although I tried so much to have the future we always talked about with you, I won’t be able to, Tones. But Morgan will be. And I would give up anything for that little girl. And for you.’’ She said as she caressed the necklace Tony gave her when she was a child. She took the chain out of her neck and put it somewhere Tony couldn’t see. And Tony knew this was only a tape but he tried to hold on to his daughter, to stop her from going out there. His breath caught in his throat when his hands went through Y/N’s body. He fell to his knees.
‘’ But hey if it turns out that I, this badass manage to get both of us home in one peace one we can laugh our asses off as we watch me being the drama queen that I am… Well, no one said Starks weren’t a bit dramatic.’’ The heart Tony thought had broken to a million pieces broke further as he heard the tremble in her voice as she tried to put her brave face on. But she couldn’t hide it when one last tear escaped from her slightly swollen eyes as she ended the recording.
Why do I never have good endings? Cause I write in the middle of the night when I feel sad most of the time and it's easier to write sad than it is to write happy.
I hope you liked it. I would love to hear your thoughts on this one. I'd also like to discuss if you'd like the alternative ending that could be a happy one :)
#avengers fanfiction#avengers x reader#avengers endgame#tony x daughter!reader#tony stark fanfiction#tony stark fanfic#tony fanfiction#tony fanfic#stark reader#tony x reader#tony x you#tony x y/n#tony stark#avenger reader#avengers fic#marvel fic
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latch (Sam Kiszka x reader)
hey guys here's the little Sam enemies to lovers smut that was requested! idc if it’s a bit cheesy, I had a ton of fun writing it so please please please send in more requests! I love helping your ideas come to life!
Warnings: Smut (Oral-f and m receiving, fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected sex)
Friday had finally rolled around and you were more than ready. After a long week of classes and work you were more than ready to have some fun tonight. You and your roommates were going to have some people over tonight to celebrate your second year of college almost being over. You had come up with the idea last weekend and quickly made a list of who all should be invited. There was one person on the guest list that you were dreading to see, no other than Samuel Kiszka.
You had met a kid named Danny Wagner in your first class freshman year, and you two became fast friends, sharing many of the same interests and hobbies. Together you and Danny were a dynamic duo, and you always made each other laugh. People often thought you were dating, but he already had a beautiful girlfriend back home. Danny also had another person constantly attached at his hip, Sam Kiszka, you’d almost think they were the ones dating.
Sam was a lanky kid with sharp features and an extremely annoying god complex. He really thought he was the absolute shit and that everyone was in awe of him. Quite honestly many people were, but you saw right through it. You found him to be arrogant and rude, and you were always disappointed to see him when you went over to Danny’s place, even though he was his roommate. Sam would often show up unannounced at your place too, mostly with Danny, but a couple of times he showed up alone. You were always polite, inviting him in like the good host you are, and you two ended up watching a movie together, and much to your surprise, in these times he was almost tolerable. Almost. He would make a snide remark or joke that would infuriate you, but he wouldn’t stick around for long, usually having somewhere to be. That somewhere was usually the bed of another girl, but they probably didn’t just watch movies.
That was another reason you couldn’t stand Sam. Last year you had a crush on him and he would do the thing where he would play with your emotion, hang out with you and flirt with you only to immediately go and fuck random girls. It hurt you, a lot, but you eventually got over it, losing the romantic feelings, or rather pushing them deep down where you’d hope they’d never surface again.
Now people were going to be at your house in an hour and you haven't even showered. It didn’t really matter though, you weren’t all too concerned with what other people thought of your appearance, so what if your hair was a little wet. You quickly rinsed off in a cold shower, then changed into a simple outfit for the night, flared corduroys and a crocheted tank top.
That was the other thing, you’d think you were exactly Sam’s type, he seemed like he would be into girls who were more artistic and down to earth, but all the girls he hooked up with seemed like they spent most of their time thinking about themselves. Not that there was anything wrong with those girls, you weren’t the “pick me” type, but it seemed like Sam would care about that kind of thing. Whatever, you don’t even like him anyways, he’s more of a nuisance than anything.
You had finished a seltzer by the time people started arriving, the playlist you and your roommates curated playing throughout the apartment. Being with your friends always made you very energetic, and people always said they liked being around you. You could get a crowd laughing in no time. People were coming through the doors and when there were about 75% of the people there, your partner in crime finally arrived. “Wagner!” you shouted across the room in a dumb accent, already a little buzzed. “Where art thou good friend?!” Danny yelled back, matching your accent as you two finally made your way to each other, wrapping him in a friendly embrace. “Where’s your obnoxious sidekick?” you whispered into his ear.
“Don’t worry he’s here. I know how you were just dying to see him.”
“Oh aren’t I always?” you responded with a sarcastic smile
“I still think you need to give him a chance, you’d probably really like him.”
Before you could even respond, he was running up behind Danny and lifting him up by his waist.
“Well if it isn’t dumb and dumber!” you exclaim before Sam comes up and wraps his arm around your shoulder.
“Oh come on (y/l/n), you love me!”
“Haha good one Kiszka, now why don’t we do something I actually love.”
“And what would that be?” Danny questions.
“Take a shot and dance our asses off!” you yell. If you were going to deal with Sam you needed to be a little more intoxicated.
You gathered your roommates and the boys and took them to the kitchen and got out the glasses.
“To friendship!” you yelled
Right then you caught danny say something quietly, and it looked like he was saying “Or more than friendship”
That made you stop for a second before throwing your head back and downing the shot.
“Ok let's get back out there” your roommate says as she pulls you by the arm.
You spend about the next half hour dancing with all your friends, taking hits of joints and drinking. You and Danny did a silly little dance you had come up with last year when you would get drunk in your dorms and do dumb shit. Mid-routine he slipped and pulled you down with him, both of you laughing your asses off. You felt someone grab your arm and help you up as the song changed, “Latch” by Sam Smith blasting through the speakers, one of the best party songs probably ever. The person who had grabbed you wrapped their arms around your waist, swaying back and forth with you to the music. You loosened the stranger’s grip and spun around only to be met with the face of that little shit, Sam.
“C’mon kid can’t you at least try to tolerate me for one song”
“Who ever said you were intolerable?” you respond, admiring how the dim light highlighted his features.
He leaned in close to your ear and lowly whispered in it “You think I can’t see it. Whenever you’re around me you act like it’s charity work.”
You pull back to look him in the eyes and say “It wasn’t always that way. Now let's get back to what we were doing. I like this song more than I like you, which is quite a lot.”
He gives you a grin before you start moving your body against him, and by the end of the song he’s staring at you in complete awe.
Once the song ended you broke free from his grasp. “See you later Kiszka” you say with a wink, turning around and disappearing into the crowd.
Your stomach was in knots, and not from disgust. The moment you just had brought up a lot of emotions, mostly about your romantic feelings for Sam but also the resentment you felt towards him. Fuck, you were in deep now. Things would be so much easier if you never had to see him again and all of this could go away. But alas, you needed to suck it up so you could still have a close relationship with Danny. Plus in about twenty minutes Sam would probably be grinding on another girl. Screw it, you were going to have a good time with your friends, you didn’t need Sam to be happy.
The rest of the night you avoided Sam, giving him zero of the attention he was craving. A couple hours later people were leaving your home or asleep somewhere in the living room, bathroom, kitchen you name it. Thankfully though, your room remained empty, you needed some space to think.
Everyone was asleep and the house was quiet, you threw on a pair of boxer shorts and an oversized Led Zeppelin shirt, passed down to you from Danny. You went to the kitchen and drank probably a gallon of water, making one last pit stop to the bathroom to pee and brush your teeth. No matter how tired you felt you knew you'd thank yourself in the morning. Finally you were on the way back to your room when you stopped in the doorway. Sam was standing in there, looking at all your decorations and your extensive vinyl collection.
“You’ve changed some stuff since the last time I was here”
“Yeah, I like to rearrange stuff y'know? keep it new and interesting.” You remarked, rubbing the back of your neck and yawning, trying to hide your obvious panic. This is the last thing you were hoping for, being confronted one on one with the man himself.
“Are you cool if I stay here tonight? Daniel is passed out on the couch and I don’t feel like making the walk home alone.”
“Of course...did you want to sleep in here?” you ask before you could even stop the words from coming out of your mouth. Fuck, you were a dumbass.
“If that’s okay with you, sleeping next to a stranger wouldn’t be my first choice.”
“You never had a problem being in a stranger’s bed before” you mumbled, looking at the floor.
He didn’t say anything, just turned his head to stare at you for a second, his eyes seeming almost apologetic.
“Well you might as well get comfortable” you tell him as you turn off the lights and flick the lamp on.
“Do you have a shirt I could borrow? I don’t really wanna sleep in jeans and a sweaty shirt.”
“Would you like an old one of Danny’s or one of mine?” you tease him, grabbing out yet another old band shirt of his roommate’s.
While he’s changing you turn away and busy yourself with lighting some incense and pulling the covers back, to avoid seeing his bare torso.
“Can I throw on a record? I can never get to sleep in the silence.”
“Help yourself” you say, but he already has a selection in his hands, Michigan by Sufjan Stevens, one of your favorites.
“Wonderful choice, but I imagine you’re a bit biased.” you say to him, both he and Danny were from the same town in Michigan and had to let everyone know.
“I just wanted something calm and serene, compared to all the fast paced stuff we’ve been blasting for the whole night.”
“Well it was a party Samuel, you have to give the people what they want” you tell him as you climb into bed.
Sam grabs for one of the pillows and a blanket, but you stop him.
“Were you gonna sleep on the floor like a dog? I don’t give a shit whether or not we share the bed.”
“I just assumed...I didn’t wanna make you uncomfortable...or anything.”
“You might be surprised by this but I actually feel pretty safe around you” you confess to him. Fuck, you were still slightly intoxicated so your filter was off. It’s okay, he was still a little drunk too it seemed.
“Do you mind if I take my pants off?” he asks you with a sincere look on his face.
You can’t help but burst out laughing, finding his awkwardness and the absurdity of the comment quite hilarious.
“I’d prefer it to your rough jeans...as long as you’re wearing underwear.”
“C’mon I’m not that much of a freak” he says as he pulls down his zipper and clumsily kicks his pants off.
You couldn’t help but stare for a moment, he looked gorgeous quite honestly, long hair tangled, old shirt hanging off his shoulders and shark boxer briefs stopping at his mid thigh.
“Okay Kiszka, get in here before I change my mind.”
He pulls back the sheets and crawls in, laying his head on the pillow facing you.
“I’m sorry” he says, looking deeply in your eyes, seeming almost ashamed.
“About what?” you knew you shouldn’t feed into this, whatever was going on here was completely platonic and wouldn’t mean anything in the morning.
“Everything. Being such a dick to you. Leading you on. I promise that’s not me, I just, I honestly don’t know how to act around you.”
“What do you mean?”
“You’re just the one person who actually kinda intimidates me. Or at least my feelings for you intimidate me.” he sighs.
“Is that why you are always fucking other girls and telling people about it when I’m around?”
“God you’re not going to take it easy on me, are you?”
“Why should I?”
“You shouldn’t. With the way I’ve treated you I honestly don’t expect anything from you, I just couldn’t hold it in any longer and I thought this was as good of a time as any.”
“Sam, can I be honest with you?”
“Of course”
“I actually don’t hate you at all like you seem to think. I can’t stand you because I really do like you, but I gave up on anything happening a long time ago.”
“Well you did a pretty good job of hiding it” he says, moving a little closer to you to the point where your noses were almost touching, the feeling of his breath giving you goosebumps. The music hummed softly in the background as you thought for a second.
“Sam don’t hate me but we’re both kinda drunk and I don't wanna do anything right now. I wanna be there for it, like fully there.”
“I was actually hoping you’d say that. I wanna take in every detail and remember it all. You’re not just another drunken hookup.”
You can’t help but give a soft smile, your cheeks going red.
“Well maybe I wouldn’t be opposed to a bit of cuddling”
“Neither would I” he says as he wraps his arms around you, pulling you in close as you bury your head in his chest, taking in his scent.
Something overtakes you, and you tilt your head up and press a soft kiss to his collarbone.
“Goodnight Samuel”
“Goodninght kid” he whispers, pressing his lips to the top of your head, and you can feel him breathing in your scent as well, elated to finally feel wanted.
********************************************************************************************************
You wake up to sunlight streaming through your curtains, turning to look at your clock but instead being met with Sam’s chest.
You were sober enough last night to remember everything that happened, Sam’s feelings for you coming to light and vice versa. It made you almost giddy with excitement, not being able to wait until his eyes opened.
You played with his hair, running your fingers through it and moving it from his neck, replacing it with your lips. Soon enough he’s stretching his arms and yawning.
“Any reason you needed to wake me up at 7 am?” he asked you, looking down at you as the pad of his thumb brushed across your cheek.
“Just couldn’t wait to see you I guess”
“That's a first” he says sarcastically, once again staring deep into your eyes.
You could hear the birds singing outside and a refreshing spring breeze made its way into your room through the open window.
You stared at each other for a second longer before he whispered “Can I?”
You nodded your head yes and he dipped his head down to capture your lips in a kiss. It started off sweet and then your lips started moving in a rhythm, his hands grabbing your legs and pulling you onto his lap. He kept kissing you as your tongue made its way into his mouth, causing his hips to buck up into you. You pulled back and let out a soft sigh, basking in the feeling of him growing hard against your core. He took this as an opportunity to attach his lips to your neck, sucking at the delicate skin and leaving little nips.
“Can I take this off?” you ask him, hands grabbing at the hem of his shirt.
“Please” he groans against your neck.
You pull it off and instantly your hands run along the expanse of his smooth skin, admiring every freckle and mole, fingertips brushing across his nipples. You pull your hands away to pull your own shirt off, blushing a bit, slightly embarrassed to show yourself to him. He takes a moment to stare at the newly exposed skin, pulling you down into a kiss a moment later and mumbling “You’re absolutely stunning” into your lips.
“You’re not too bad yourself” you say with a smile spreading across your face, quickly losing it as you bite your lip when he starts to move his hips once again, his bulge rubbing deliciously against your already wet core.
“I need more of you” he grunts, obviously frustrated.
You tangle your hands in his hair and pull his head back a bit, looking down into his eyes before saying “then have me”, pulling him into a kiss.
In a swift movement he flips you both over, kneeling with his legs on either side of you.
“These need to come off” he says, tugging at the waistband of the boxers you slept in. As he pulled them off and the cold air hit your core, you couldn’t help but drink all of him in, admiring just how gorgeous he looked, as if he was sculpted by the gods himself. That moment ended when you felt his middle finger run lightly up and down your slit. You threw your head back and closed your eyes, concentrating on the feeling of his skin on yours.
“Please Sammy, I need you” you say, surprised at yourself for using that nickname with him.
He looks at you and smiles before lowering his gaze to your dripping cunt, furrowing his brows as he pushes his long finger inside of you. You mewl as he pushes it down to the last knuckle, letting you adjust for a moment before starting to slowly pump in and out.
“Fuck you’re tight. So much better than I imagined.”
“So you’ve thought about this before?” You smirk at him, turning your eyes to look at the sight of his finger pumping in and out.
“Quite a lot actually, I’ve thought a lot about how you taste too” he says before readjusting himself so his head is buried in between your thighs. It only takes a second for his tongue to find your clit as he inserts another finger and starts to pump a little faster.
“Fuck you’re good at this” you say as you let out a breathy moan, hands once again finding their way into his hair. That causes him to moan around your clit, sending vibrations through your whole body. You don’t know how much longer you’d be able to last, with Sam lapping at you like it’s his last meal.
You pull his hair, forcing his lips to part from your sensitive bud, pulling him into a sloppy kiss.
“I wanna taste you too” you say before getting up and kneeling on the floor in front of your brd, motioning him to sit with his legs over the side, facing you. You look up at him as you pull his boxers down, length hitting his stomach. You take a second to admire it, with its pink head, a large vein running up the bottom. It was a nice length, with quite a bit of girth to it, surrounded by a small patch of pubic hair. As you wrapped your hand around it you said “not to be weird or anything but your dick is gorgeous”, causing him to let out a light laugh that was quickly stifled when you wrapped your head around the tip of his cock. His fingers intertwined with your hair, lightly pulling it, not forcing you down on his dick like some guys do. You gently moved your head up and down, taking as much of him as you could in your mouth and using your hand to stroke the rest.
“Fuck I need to be inside of you” he groans, tugging at your hair, causing you to pull your mouth off his dick with a small pop.
“Can I ride you?” you question as you make your way back onto the bed.
“Fuck yes, I can’t promise how long I’ll last though” he says, pulling you in for another kiss as you line him up up with your entrance. You run his tip along your slit a few times before slowly starting to lower yourself down, taking your time to adjust to his size. Once he’s fully sheathed inside of you, he throws his head back, letting out a guttural moan.
“Fuck, you feel so fucking good, I’ve wanted this for a long time.”
“So have I” you say before starting to slowly move yourself up and down on him.
It’s lazy and sweet, not perfect or anything, but nothing about this situation really was. You wouldn’t have it any other way.
“Fuck” he remarks as he grabs your hips, fingers sinking into your skin,helping you move up and down on his delicious cock.
“You fill me up so perfectly, god you feel so good”
“I guess it was meant to be baby” he says with a grin, putting his fingers in his mouth then moving them down to rub circles around your clit.
“Fuck Kiszka, if you keep taht up I’m gonna cum.”
“That was my goal, I’m close too” he breathes out as he buries his head in your neck.
You clutch the back of his head as you start to move yourself up and down faster, fucking yourself on his cock.
“Fuck Sam I’m gonna cum”
“Me too babe, where do you want me to?” he asks shakily.
The only word you can muster out is “Inside” as you approach your peak, clenching around him once more before tipping over the edge.
It’s complete bliss as you ride out your high, feeling him give one last deep thrust into you before coating your walls with his warm ropes of seed.
You collapse against him, nuzzling your head into his neck, pressing sloppy open mouthed kisses as you both catch your breath.
He pushes your hair to the side, leaving his lips on your temple while he remains sheathed inside you.
“Thank you” he says, still regaining his breath and returning to reality.
“Don’t leave me” you say softly into his ear.
“I wouldn’t for the world, don’t you worry kid.”
You sit up and look into his soft brown eyes, taking in how much things have changed in the past few hours.
“I don’t hate you. Not in the least. I just hated the idea of not being with you.”
“Same here, but we don’t have to feel that anymore. I’m sorry for the way I treated you. You deserve the world, and I want to try my hardest to give it to you.”
“Thank you Samuel, I’ll try to do the same.”
You give him one last long kiss before pulling back, pushing his hair behind his ear and saying “C’mon loverboy, let’s go get some breakfast.”
#sam kiszka#sam kiszka imagine#sam kiszka fanfic#sam kiszka smut#greta van fleet#greta van fic#greta van fleet fan fiction#greta van fleet imagine#josh kiszka#josh kiszka imagine#josh kiszka smut#josh kiszka fan fic#jake kiszka imagine#jake kiszka#jake kiszka smut#jake kiszka fanfic#danny wagner#Danny Wagner imagine#Danny Wagner smut#Danny Wagner fanfic#peaceful army
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Baby Steps
Request: @gubswh0re requested: "hi! could you do 20,25 & 48 from the promt list all in one? would be amazing, thank you!!"
Summary: A case gone wrong and Spencer blames himself. Reader tries to make him feel better.
Couple: Spencer Reid x reader
Category: hurt/comfort, angst, a bit of fluff if you never felt happiness before
CW: sad as fuck uhm I lowkey broke my own heart but its also really sweet
Word Count: 1,9k
If I had to describe Spencer Reid handling his emotions in two words, they would be “quiet suffering”. In the two years I have known him he only opened up a handful of times. Not in the sense of him never talking about his past or things that happened to him, but whenever he talked about these things, he tells them like one of his facts. He tells you that his mother has schizophrenia, but he doesn't tell you how he feels about it. It always reminds me of a medical anamnesis.
On rare occasions, he would break. Everything became too much, even for him. I remember the first time I witnessed it very clearly. It was after he visited his mom for a few days and, from what he told me, she was in such a bad condition that she didn’t even recognize him. He was devastated and when he was on his way back he drove straight to my apartment, not knowing how to deal with everything. Spencer didn’t call or text before he arrived there and saying I was surprised when I opened my door doesn't even come close. His eyes were bloodshot and it looked like he hadn’t slept for weeks. Truth be told, I was very overwhelmed so I did the only thing I could think of. I pulled him inside and hugged him as hard as humanly possible.
In the office everyone always jokes about Dr Reid and his fear of human touch, but he hugged me back so hard that breathing became just a little difficult, and in that moment I realized the reason he doesn’t hug people isn’t because of his fear of bacteria. It’s because of the closeness of it. My heart cracked then.
The next discovery I made was that Spencer is a quiet cryer. I didn’t even notice it until his tears started seeping through my shirt and I could feel the wetness. I don’t know how long we stood there, but when I could feel him calming down a bit, I pulled away just enough to be able to look at him. He was extremely embarrassed and started to pull away completely to cover his face with his hands, but I’m too stubborn for that, so I grabbed his wrists and made him look at me. He started crying again then.
It took an hour until he started telling me what got him so upset and after that we talked the whole night, about his mother, her sickness and everything related to it. I always hoped that he would open up about it eventually, but when he finally did, I couldn’t handle it very well. I tried not to cry myself, but that is hard when the person you love most breaks down in front of you like that.
That night I held him close, let him lie on my chest, played with his hair - everything to try and make his pain go away. And after that day I thought things would have changed, that he would stop hiding and open up more to me, but I was very wrong. When he woke up the next morning he apologized about a hundred times and no words or reassurance made him less ashamed. Afterwards he tried to act like nothing had ever happened.
So in conclusion: I had done a lot of difficult tasks in my life, but getting Spencer Reid to talk about his feelings was by far the most difficult. Nonetheless, today was one of those rare days.
We just came back from a really shitty case that resulted in more victims than it should have due to the police department holding back evidence. It was messy and frustrating and exhausting. Spencer was there when one of the victims was shot and he blamed himself for not preventing it, even though we all told them that there was no chance that he could have done it.
And as if the case itself wasn't bad enough, we were stuck for more time back in the office to do the paperwork. When the clock turned 8 pm Hotch came out of his office to tell us to go home. We all sighed in relief and started packing up our things. All of us except a particular dr. He was still sitting at his desk, typing away on his computer. I watched him for a while, contemplating what to do, and after everyone said their goodbyes, I walked over to him.
“Come on. I’ll take you home”, I said, leaning on his desk trying to catch his eyes with mine. No luck.
“I still have work to do, I’ll take the subway home later.” He continued typing like i wasn’t even there and I got frustrated. The case was already bad enough and I would not stand here watching him torture himself.
“That wasn’t a request, Spencer.” I didn’t intend to sound so harsh but hey, at least it made him look at me. “We are gonna leave. Now.” He opened his mouth to protest and closed it again, he knew better than to argue with me. My eyes said it all: If he would stay, I would stay. And since Spencer Reid cares about everyone but himself, he closed his computer and packed up his things.
The walk to my car was quiet, and so were the first 5 minutes of driving. I kept glancing at him from the driver's seat, but he was looking out of the window, lost in thought. The guy on the radio made a stupid comment and normally he would have immidiatly complained, but it seemed like he didn’t even hear it. His brain is a beautiful place with a million facts and ideas, yet I can imagine how scary it can be as well. When Spencer gets really lost in his thoughts he begins to spiral and I can just guess that that is what happened at that moment. Only then I came to the conclusion that he wanted to stay and work because that would distract him from anything going on inside.
“Talk to me, Spence.” My tone was pleading, practically begging at this point.
“I’m fine, y/n.” I sighed. I was thinking about just letting it go, but then I thought about him alone in his apartment, stuck in this beautiful scary brain of his. I wanted to help, but I didn’t know how. I took a deep breath. If you're lost, stick to what you know.
“Do you trust me?”
“What?”, he turned to me with a quizzical expression on his face.
“Do you trust me?”, I asked again, looking him in the eyes this time.
“Of course I trust you. Why are you even asking me this?”
“We’re making a detour. I’m gonna show you something.” My words didn’t leave room for questions so we just fell silent again. He continued to watch me with a questioning look, but i tried to ignore him. I was too focused on taking the right turns anyway. It was hard to find my way in the dark, but 5 minutes later we were there. I got out of the car and waited for Spencer to do the same and after he did, he seemed more confused than ever. I walked over to the familiar building and fished for a key at the same moment.
“What is this place?”
“It’s an art gallery. My mom used to work here.” I found what I was looking for and started to unlock the door.
“And you just have a key to this place?” If the circumstances were different, I would have laughed at his confusion, however, the circumstances weren’t different.
“Yep.” The door opened and I looked for the light switch. “Come on, just follow me.”
I led us up the 5 flights of stairs and then, after 2 more doors we were finally there. The place that has been the only place I called home for the years before I joined the team.
“Are you sure we should be doing this? We’re not breaking in right now, are we?” At this I did laugh. I stepped further onto the rooftop.
“Relax Spence, we are not breaking any laws.” He was still hesitant so I took his hand and pulled him to the edge. The railing was high, meaning there was no danger of falling down. I let go of his hand and leaned on it. The building was on a small hill and since it had a few stories, you were able to look over a big part of the city. It was always a beautiful view, but that night was extra special. It was a Friday in the late summer, which didn’t only mean the sky was clear, there were also a lot of traffic lights and buildings that shone bright.
I just watched and after a few minutes Spencer stood beside me and did the same. Some time passed before I broke the silence.
“How many people are living in the US?” He didn’t hesitate before answering. It was like a reflex for him by now. I liked to ask random questions all the time and to this day, he always had an answer.
“331.002.651 people.” I paused for a few seconds.
“You can’t protect all of them, Spencer.”
“Y/n I-”
“I mean it, Spence. It is humanly impossible to protect everyone. You can protect some of them, maybe even a lot, but you won’t ever be able to do that if you keep beating yourself up over incidents like today.” He sighed and opened his mouth to speak, but I wasn’t done. “I know how you feel and I know it’s not easy. There was no chance for you to save that girl, Spencer. Zero. And if you can’t accept that, you will lose yourself. And then you won’t be able to save anyone anymore.” I know it was harsh, however, sometimes that's the only language he understands.
“You could have said all of that in the car.” He paused. “Why did you take me here?” I didn’t expect him to comment on what I said. He knew I was right, that’s all I needed.
“My mom sometimes took me with her on her shifts and after she was done we would go up here. After she died the owner gave me a key so that I could come here every time I needed it. Or needed her.”
“Do you come here often?”
“Not anymore. This place was the only thing making me feel at home for years and I came almost every day, but when I started working at the BAU I stopped going here more and more. And now I don’t really need it anymore, because my apartment finally started feeling like home. Especially when you are there.” I looked at him while saying that last sentence and I saw him smile for the first time in days. His eyes caught mine.
“Thank you, y/n.” Those words could have many different meanings. Thank you for taking me here. Thank you for staying. Thank you for making me feel better. But it didn’t matter what he meant, because I knew.
“Do you want to go home?”
“I think I’d like to stay for a bit longer.”
And that's what we did. We stayed there for hours. That night we talked through every possible way of how Spencer could have acted differently, yet every scenario ended with the death of that girl. After that he finally accepted that it wasn’t his fault. Baby steps.
#spencer reid#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x reader#criminal minds#reider#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#this one hurt ngl
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AUBADE ; HARRY STYLES
WORD COUNT: 12k
warnings: smut, smoking, alcohol consumption.
thank you @harryandhockey and @burberryharold for beta-ing this baby, you guys are the sweetest angels!
When the doorbell goes off for the third time that night, she groans and tosses the lipstick on her bed, then makes her way towards the door. Through the stained glass, she sees a tall figure and rolls her eyes.
“Look, this is the third time- oh. It’s you.”
The blonde raises her eyebrows, “Who were you expecting? Also wow, I feel so welcome, thank you.”
“Sorry,” the door closes behind Charlotte, and they walk inside.
Once in the tiny kitchen, kettle already on, she takes time to coat her eyelashes with mascara.
“Who did you think I was, that was quite the welcome.”
“Couple of girls kept knocking on the door. Something about a survey. I’ve no idea. Hey, can you help me put this on?” She takes a necklace out of her jean pocket and hands it over.
It’s Thursday, which means happy hour at their local pub and after that, they’d take N31 towards Camden to listen to a friend of Charlotte’s, an upcoming indie artist. She usually didn’t like going out on weekdays since she worked 8 to 4 and she would need to wake up at 6AM sharp to get ready and leave her flat for her Friday shift. But ever since Charlotte started working for the touring musician Harry Styles, they saw each other twice- once when they toured England and the second one being right before Charlotte left for tour. Being close friends since school, it was safe to say that she felt her absence and missed her friend dearly but were also so proud of her for everything she’d achieved.
So when Charlotte came home during their break, she wanted to spend as much time as possible with her friend and if it meant spending her Friday shift hungover while cleaning up animal urine and puke from all kinds of animals, then so be it.
“There,” Charlotte pats her on the neck after she clasps the necklace and she turns around, hand reaching to turn the kettle off.
“Ta. When are we leaving? And do you think I should go for my Adidas or the boots?” She points at the heeled boots, half white half black by the kitchen entrance and Charlotte follows her gaze as she sips the hot beverage.
She looks at the boots, then her, then the boots again, “The boots for fuckin’ sure. They’re sick- where’d you get them?”
“Depop,” She lets out a chuckle, “Think they’re Topshop, ‘m not sure. Should we leave? Y’know I walk dead slow and now that I’m wearin’ the boots…”
“You really do...go get your shit, I’ll wash this.”
They’re gathered around a round table, the green paint of the wooden table beginning to chip, and everyone’s got drinks of their own, G&T being the most popular choice. There are only five of them, Charlotte, her, Phoebe and her girlfriend Jamie, and they’re chatting about anything and everything until Charlotte turns to her, straw between her red lips.
“So-”
“Oh dear, what have you done,” she cuts her off and earns a glare from her, and from the corner of her eye, she sees Phoebe and Jamie cross their arms as if they’re getting ready for their usual bickering.
“Fuck you,” Charlotte sighs, “I didn’t do anything. I just invited some more people to Julien’s show and wanted to...kinda ask if that’s alright with you”
“Oh,” she looks around the table, finding the other girls looking at their phones and she turns to Charlotte, “It’s fine. Who are they?”
Phoebe snorts at that and her eyebrows raise in question. She gives Phoebe a look, but Charlotte’s quicker as she throws a damp tissue at the blonde and Jamie laughs when it lands back on Charlotte’s lap. “You know Sarah from the band?”
“Oh, yeah!”
She remembers meeting Sarah at Charlotte’s new flat after she moved to London, the brunette bringing a cute snake plant and a weird- but cute tea set as a housewarming gift and they got on well. They talked about plants, Sarah giving her tips on how to keep certain plants alive, and she asked her lots of questions about her experience being a woman, especially a drummer in the music industry. Sarah was very soft spoken; she spoke as if she was talking to a baby, but she always made sure to maintain eye contact when she was having a conversation with you, listening and nodding when appropriate so that you felt special and...understood. She was lovely, which was why she found it weird how Charlotte was acting awkward about her joining them tonight.
“And her boyfriend, Mitch, of course,” Charlotte adds and she nods, motioning for her to keep going. “And Harry.”
“Harry Styles?”
“Oh boy,” Jamie whistles.
“Obviously,” Charlotte sucks on her straw, slurping her drink, “Yeah, him,” she repeats, this time softer.
“I...why?” She chooses to ask, surprised as she’d like to think Harry Styles as this unreachable, ever-so-busy person who wouldn’t be interested in a night out like this. She turns to Phoebe, and then Jamie, and they respond with a shrug as Phoebe goes back to cuddling into Jamie’s side.
“What do you mean why?” Charlotte places her drink on the table, “It would be rude not to since I asked Sarah and Mitch.”
“Well, I just mean, isn’t he busy?”
Jamie whistles again and sings her name, “You got a crush, babes?”
“Nonsense, never even met the guy- which,” she looks around the table, “-is one of the reasons why I was confused. Anyway, it doesn't matter,” she shrugs and turns to Charlotte, “I’m not bothered, Lotts, it’s totally fine.”
“Y’sure?”
She gives her a nod, “I just find him intimidating and don’t think he’d be into indie, that’s all.”
It was true. Despite having not met Mr. Harry Styles, deep down she knew he’d be intimidating because he was so good looking and well, just like most people, she loved One Direction. She was a big fan, she even got told off by her stepmother once when she was younger because apparently the tape she used to hang her One Direction posters was ruining the walls. She often referred to them as twinks, and she didn’t even know what it meant until she was older. She remembers how she got made fun of at sixth form because one of the girls found her old Tumblr and told everyone about it. Harry’s never been her favourite though. Not because she didn’t find him attractive, not at all. It was because he was too attractive and was everyone’s favourite so whenever asked, she’d shrug and tell people how she found Louis funny, and then Zayn because ’he’s the hottest’.
Long story short, despite her friendship with Charlotte, she’d never met Harry, never had the opportunity to attend one of his shows because she was either too busy or they were playing in a different country and she simply couldn’t afford it. So tonight would be the first time they’d get to be in the same place and to say that she was nervous would be an understatement. And her, she always thought she was awkward. Way too awkward for social gatherings but she liked going out regardless, drinking cheap alcohol and dancing to shitty songs in an equally shitty pub. She loved being a student. Loved the freedom the title had given her. What’s your occupation, she’d get asked from time to time. Student, she’d say without hesitating. She was a student. She didn’t have to be anything else for three years. Sure, she was also working part time at an animal shelter but for the most part, she loved being a student. That’s how she met Phoebe, and then Jamie. In a way, she was their matchmaker.
She remembers meeting Phoebe last year when they had a class together. She was the first person to smile at her in the overcrowded lecture theatre and she remembers thinking how nice Phoebe’s green fringe looked. Meeting Jamie though, was funny. Phoebe usually got weird when they joked about it since she met Jamie before Phoebe did on Tinder, even went on a date with her, and then right before she was about to ghost her, she thought of how similar Phoebe and Jamie were. It was then that she made Phoebe go on a date with Jamie, and after a month of pining, they got together. Even though they were similar, she always thought that they actually completed each other, Jamie being the logical one and Phoebe encouraging Jamie to let loose from time to time and live in the moment.
Charlotte reaches and boops her nose, “He’s a musician, he loves all kinds of music. He won’t eat you, babe. He’s nice, I promise.”
Phoebe knocks on the wood, getting everyone’s attention, “Can we get a picture with him? An autograph?”
She feels a throbbing pain in her feet, toes in particular once they’re in and they wait for Phoebe and Jamie to buy their drinks, knowing she’d wake up with blisters in the morning. Charlotte takes out her phone and presumably texts the others, letting them know they were already here. She felt nervous. Nervous because she always thought she was rubbish when it came to meeting new people; they either thought she was too intimidating or rude but in reality, it was only because she always felt anxious meeting new people and would rather stay quiet than talking nonsense.
She takes time to analyse her outfit, a pair of black mom jeans and her boots, oh the boots who were currently grilling her feet. Then she tries to adjust her lace bodysuit, all of a sudden feeling super self conscious about the ”revealing” outfit. She adjusts the top, hoping her tits weren’t out before, and sighs when she touches the oversized blazer, rolling up the sleeves a bit more since it was beginning to get warm, too warm for her liking inside. Considering how she often felt self conscious about her arms, she felt more comfortable with the blazer over the sexy bodysuit.
“So,” she starts, eyes studying the crowded bar before her gaze stops at Charlotte, “Are they here?”
Charlotte looks up from her phone and nods, leaning her head on her shoulder. She feels her arm going around her waist and smiles, nudging her head with hers and she looks up, giving her a smile of her own. “What’s up, blondie?” she asks, hand coming up to ruffle Charlotte’s fringe.
She sighs, “Just tired, to be honest. I’m glad I wore trainers.”
“At least one of us is happy about their shoe choice.”
They watch as Phoebe and Jamie walk towards them, the brunette handing her a tall glass as Phoebe hands Charlotte her own drink. “When’s she on?”
Everyone turns to Charlotte, “Half an hour, maybe?”
“When are your friends coming? It’s getting quite...stuffy in here,” Jamie looks around and Phoebe nods, hands going around Jamie’s waist to pull the brunette into her.
“I texted Sarah and she said Harry was parking the car- oh, I see Mitch.”
They all look around, and she spots the tall guy with long hair, walking towards them with Sarah and Harry behind. She gulps and tries to look away, praying that no one takes notice of her sweaty forehead and shaky hands.
As the trio walk towards them, she takes a moment to examine Harry, and his outfit. Even in the dimly lit bar, she’s almost sure the high waisted trousers he has on are navy, and he’s got a tan...or a beige shirt tucked in them, chest on full display and she notices a cross necklace, looking as if it was made for his pretty neck. She clears her throat as quietly as she can and looks down but not before she takes a peek at his shoes, and she almost snorts at the choice of red boots he’s got on, noticing how everyone had trainers on while the two of them had what looked like very uncomfortable boots on.
To be honest, she thinks, he looks pretty good. She looks around them, noticing how most guys had jeans and ugly trainers on whereas Harry looked like he made quite the effort with his outfit but she also knows that even if he turned up in jeans and ugly trainers, he would still look amazing. Damn Harry Styles. Was she blushing?
The three of them are in their space now, close enough so she can make out Sarah’s overpowering perfume, and she clears her throat once again when Charlotte embraces Sarah first, then Mitch. Before she can watch her hug Harry, Sarah’s in front of her.
“Hi,” she smiles, going in for a hug, “It’s so nice to see you again. It’s been a while,” she says and her voice comes out muffled since they’re still hugging and she hopes her hair smells decent because Sarah’s face is pressed against her neck and hair.
“It’s nice to see you too! How have you been?”
“‘Been alright, I suppose!” She beams at her and turns to the man with long hair, “This is Mitch.”
As Sarah introduces everyone with Mitch, she feels Harry’s eyes on her, though she can’t turn her head and meet his gaze because that’d be rude seeing how Mitch is about to reach and give her a one armed hug. Alright then, she thinks, they’re a hugger. Then, it’s Harry’s turn. She looks at him, seeing how his eyes are focused on Phoebe and Jamie as he gives them both a warm smile before Charlotte starts talking again, introducing everyone to Phoebe and Jamie, then everyone turns to her, and she feels her face heat up seeing how everyone’s attention is on her now. She knows it’s her turn.
Harry takes a step forward and her earlier thoughts are confirmed when she can finally make out the colour of his trousers. “Hey, ‘m Harry,” he gives her a smile without waiting for Charlotte to speak, “Nice meeting you,” he comes closer and wraps an arm around her, engulfing her in a hug but it’s definitely different from Mitch or Sarah’s hug. It’s tight, much warmer and he’s got both arms around her, palms flat against her back as he rubs her back.
And of course she responds with the same warmness and hugs him back, “Hiya,” she introduces herself, and once they pull apart, he repeats her name and it sounds like poetry, something so personal and...erotic. But maybe, she thinks, maybe it’s just his deep voice making her feel that way.
Despite the moment they shared, if she could call it that, felt like hours, it was merely a minute. And it wasn’t like in the films where they hug, everything around them slowing down as the people watch in awe. No, not at all. When she looks around, she sees that everyone’s been already mingling, Phoebe and Jamie smiling at each other while they sipped their drinks, and Mitch is nowhere to be seen, possibly at the bar getting drinks.
Harry turns to Charlotte with a grin, “So is she any good, should we replace you with her?” He says, nudging her with his hip.
That sort of makes her smile, seeing Harry so carefree and friendly with the people who are essentially working for him. Even though she doesn’t know Harry Styles like they do, like Charlotte does, she knows he considers these people to be his friends and colleagues rather than his employees. It’s also fun seeing him this friendly with her best friend, and she feels proud, as she always does, knowing Charlotte has made herself great friends and that she clearly enjoys working with these people.
Charlotte nudges him back, “She’s great, I wouldn’t mind being replaced by her. Oh, there she is,” she points at the stage, and everyone turns to look at the pink-haired girl on the tiny stage with a sleek looking acoustic guitar on her side. As the others start talking about Julien, she finally takes the opportunity to look at Harry. Once their eyes meet, he gives her a smile, dimples on full display, and she swears she could see him blush when he looks down after she beamed at him. Even if he did blush though, he recovers quickly when he’s offered a drink and he mutters a thank you to Mitch, then lifts the slice of lime off the rim of his glass and sucks it into his mouth and she deems it as a good time to look away.
And she does, when she feels Sarah close, and she turns to her, Sarah welcoming her with a smile, “How’s uni? It’s your last year, right?”
“Oh, yeah,” she clears her throat, “It’s alright. Exhausting, but alright.”
“You’re working too, right?”
“Yeah, I work at an animal shelter.”
“It must be exhausting.”
“It is,” she gives her a nod, “I work three days a week and I also have classes so I only have Sundays off. I’ll probably leave and focus on uni after Christmas break though, I have my dissertation next semester.”
“Oh, cool! I miss being a student,” she purses her lips and turns to Harry, who had been listening to their conversation, his pretty fingers, most of them adorned with equally pretty rings, wrapped around the tall glass, “You probably can’t relate, H, can ya?”
He rolls her eyes but laughs regardless, “Piss off.”
Despite the chatter around them, it’s not ridiculously loud so they can carry a conversation without having to shout. They fall into an easy conversation, everyone joining in, and all of a sudden a pink neon light falls over them and they all turn to the stage. Julien starts singing, and all the chatter around them dies down, some people already starting to sing the words back at her.
She looks away from the stage for a minute and catches Harry’s gaze from across the room. They’re close enough for her to make out a few droplets of sweat on Harry’s forehead, and their eyes meet as he gives her a smile, eyes sparkling with mischief, then brings the glass up to his mouth. She watches as his top lip rests on the rim before he lifts it to his mouth and when she looks up, she sees him still looking at, gaze unwavering and mouth curled upwards in a sly smirk. She was caught. She was caught and he looked like he was loving and devouring every second of it.
Julien takes a break, promising to come back with a brand new song from her upcoming EP, and there’s a group of people making their way towards the exit, presumably to have a smoke and get some fresh air.
“Where’s she gone?” Charlotte huffs, eyes searching the room for the pink haired girl.
“She’s over there,” Phoebe points at Julien and they all turn to where she’s pointing at, spotting Julien near the bar with a drink in hand.
“Is she flirting?”
“She’s got groupies already?” she says after she takes her eyes off of Harry and everyone laughs.
Charlotte comes closer and nudges her shoulder against her, “You’d know, wouldn’t you?” “Be quiet,” she nudges back, and their group falls back into their conversation except Harry, who keeps staring at her and she gulps, hands reaching to feel her blazer pockets.
“Right,” she mutters, “It’s time to poison myself. I’m going out for a fag,” once she feels the bulge in her pocket, she turns to Charlotte, “Send me a text when she’s back on, yeah?”
“I’ll come with.”
She looks up at Harry, surprised, but nods, waiting for him to follow her outside. Even though she tries her best not to make eye contact with anyone as they leave, she’s aware of them watching them, everyone in their group equally surprised, but they keep walking, Harry following quietly behind. Once they pass the smelly bodies, they’re finally outside, the wind licking her face once she steps out and she tries to hug herself closer, seeing how the thin blazer’s not doing a good job at keeping her warm.
Harry wishes he’d brought a coat.
They’re quiet as he follows her to a quiet corner, only a few people turning their heads their way, presumably recognising him, and they stop near a brick wall and she takes her tobacco out of her left pocket. She looks up, catching him staring at her ring-clad fingers wrapped around the dark green packet, and she clears her throat, making him look up at her. They share a smile, both feeling at ease with the comfortable silence between them. She spots a wooden bench near and sits down, hands already working the packet open. When she starts tearing the tobacco apart, Harry can’t help but note how quickly she’s working it between her fingers, and he’s almost certain she’s been doing this for years.
“Want one?” She asks and he saunters forward, coming to stand in front of her with hands in his pockets.
He shrugs and she takes that as a yes, fingers pausing their work on the tobacco to take out something that resembles a cigarette and it’s only when she pushes it from the bottom that Harry realises they’re filters. Placing one between her lips, her fingers dip into her pocket once again to retrieve some papers and Harry finds himself unable to look away from her lips and how pretty they look with something between them.
He looks down at her lap, where the packet of tobacco is, seeing her fingers work swiftly as she fills the thin paper, and despite knowing better not to glamorise something as horrible and disgusting as smoking, he takes his time to admire the way she pushes down the tobacco with her index finger, presumably trying to fit and secure everything inside the paper. Taking the filter from between her lips, she places it inside the paper, at the very end, and her fingers start rolling.
Oh fuck, he thinks, knowing what’s about to come. Unable to look away, he watches as she brings it up to her mouth and licks a long stripe along the paper, and despite the lack of lighting around them, his eyes make out her pink tongue moving along the paper and it doesn’t come as a surprise when he feels a sudden twitch in his trousers at the unholy image before his eyes.
“There,” she hands him the rolled up cigarette, “Hope you don’t mind that I licked?”
He wants to laugh because of course he doesn’t mind. In fact, he quite enjoyed it, according to the knot in his stomach and his twitching cock in his underwear. He enjoyed it so much that he now couldn’t stop imagining her mouth doing other things, preferably dirty things with, or to him.
“Nah, it’s all good, thanks.”
“No probs. Didn’t take you as the smoking type,” she lets it slip out.
“I...don’t smoke, really. Only sometimes. When I’m drinking. Which…” He looks at the cigarette between her fingers, “...isn’t that often.”
She notices the nervousness that tinges his words, and it makes her feel better knowing he’s also as awkward as her. “Fair,” she sends him a smile and repeats all the steps on her own rollie, putting it between her lips just like Harry, and she takes her lighter out of the same pocket. She lights her own first and reaches to light his, and he sort of bends over until his cigarette reaches the lighter. They both take a hefty drag of their cigarettes and she blows the smoke out first, Harry watching her pursed lips as he lets out his own next, both of their cigarette smoke swirling in the air and joining in together.
He takes it out of his mouth and lets his arm dangle on his side, cigarette between his fingers, and watches as she takes another drag before fumbling with the packet on her lap, putting everything back in her pocket haphazardly.
“Do you go to uni in London, or?”
“Westminster, yeah,” she takes another drag and notices how Harry hasn’t taken another one of his since.
“Nice,” he says and a grin stretches over his face, “Charlotte talks about you a lot.”
“She does?”
“Yeah, all the time. If I didn’t know about her boyfriend I’d say she was in love with you,” he laughs and gestured to the lighter in her hand and she lets him take the lighter from her hand, watching as the flame lick at the cigarette between Harry’s lip and he takes a long drag. “I mean, we...the band feel like we already know you. It’s sweet, how much she cares about you.”
“Well, I’m pretty hard not to love, you know.”
He blows out the smoke, a chuckle escaping his mouth, “That right?”
“Yeah, I’m fucking great.”
“Well, I-”
He gets interrupted by her phone going off and a pout forms on his face. She huffs, looking around, then throws the cigarette on the ground despite the sign and he does the same, not feeling bad in the slightest. “We going in?” He asks, like a lost puppy waiting for his owner’s command.
“I guess. Is it bad that I don’t want to? Like...does that make me a bad friend?”
“Nah. I...I kinda wanted to stay here too. I was enjoying our conversation.”
She sends him a grin, eyes mischievous, and stops walking, “You telling me you weren’t bored to death by my dry ass conversation?”
“Dry? You opened up and talked about your narcissistic behaviours, that’s not boring, darling,” he smirks and she rolls her eyes, hand reaching to slap his chest and it feels easy, like they’ve known each other for years. “Alright, alright, ’m just messing with you.”
She starts walking again, a few steps ahead of him, and he follows, passing three girls with phones up to their faces.
It’s easy, he thinks, it’s easy with her.
People in the bar begin to leave one by one, and it’s only their small group and a few others left, some of them still sipping their drinks and the others talking and laughing. Some even come up to Julien, who’s sipping her water from a reusable water bottle as Charlotte keeps snapping pictures of her, and they all congratulate her, telling her how excited they are about the EP. She’s all smiles, fringe sticking to her forehead due to sweat, and her long arms are equally sweaty, dressed in a tight black dress with striped knee high socks adorning her long legs, and a pair of platform Mary Janes.
“So,” Harry says, folding his arms across his chest, “Do you have any plans for October?”
Mitch snorts across him and Julien tilts her head, puzzled, “Erm...I’ve no idea, to be honest. It’s months away and God knows I’m shite at thinking ahead. That’s why I’m friends with this lot,” she gestures to their tiny group, causing Charlotte to snort and Julien continues, turning her attention to her who’s playing with the hem of her blazer, “This one though...”
“Oh, fuck off.”
“Oi, what’s crawled up your bum, eh?” Julien turns to Harry again, catching how his gaze flickered over her body, then her face instead of looking at Julien and she finds herself smirking at the tension between the two.
“We’re thinking of putting a show together for Halloween. I have a bunch of new and upcoming artists in my mind that I’d love to see perform that night. Would you be interested?” Harry’s attention is back on Julien and he watches as the girl gasps, eyes widening in excitement.
“Shut the fuck up!” She yells, almost dropping her water bottle and they all laugh, Charlotte reaching to flip her on the forehead and she slaps her freshly-manicured hand away, “You’re not taking the piss, are you?”
Harry laughs, “Am definitely not. I love your vibe. That’s actually one of the reasons why I asked Charlotte if I could come tonight,” he says as he runs his fingers through his hair, the strands gliding easily between his long fingers.
“Yeah,” Charlotte smiles at Julien, “He’s on a hunt. He thinks he’s one of those talent agents. Just say yes, Jules, it’ll be fun.”
“Holy fuck. Yes. Fuck, yes. Of fucking course, yes!”
They all laugh when she lunges herself at Harry, arms wrapping around his neck, “Thank you, thank you, thank you, fuck I could literally kiss you right now but I won’t, I’ve been watching you both undress each other with your eyes all night,” arms still around Harry’s neck, Julien turns her head towards her, whom Harry’s been looking at all night, and gives her a wink before breaking their hug. “So, do I have to do anything? What do I have to do? Fuck, I’m so bad at this-”
“Hey,” Harry interrupts, “It’s fine. Relax. Are you signed with anyone? Have a manager?”
“Oh, yeah, I’m with Gleam, my manager, Alana, she’s sick that’s why she wasn't here tonight.”
“Okay, that’s fine. Just give me your phone number and your manager’s contact details and we’ll sort everything out. Hey- relax, it’s gonna be fun!” He reaches and gives her shoulder a squeeze.
“I called an Uber,” Sarah says after her phone goes off, “And it looks like…” she taps on the screen a few times, “Hassan is here.”
“We could’ve gotten maccies,” she says, pouting, as her head rests on Charlotte’s shoulder.
Sarah sighs, cuddling closer into Mitch’s side, “We’re leaving for Brighton tomorrow morning.”
“Yeah, Sarah’s making us wake up at, like, five,” Mitch grumbles.
They all start walking towards the exit, Julien and Harry in the back talking about the show as Charlotte links her arm with her as they follow behind the others. As they walk, she remembers how Harry arrived with Sarah and Mitch, meaning they shared a ride, and she turns to look at Harry who seems to be in deep conversation as he waves his hands around.
She feels hot all of a sudden, remembering how neither of them wanted to go inside earlier, how good he looked and how his voice sounded, deep, so deep, when his attention was only on her and not the girl on the stage or his drink or the people around them. As selfish as it sounds, she wanted all his attention on her, she wanted him to only look at her, see her, think of her, and she feels foolish because they only met tonight, and their conversation earlier didn’t last that long.
Once they’re outside, everyone sighs, almost in relief as the fresh air fills their lungs, and everyone bids their goodbyes to Sarah and Mitch, then Phoebe starts complaining about how uncomfortable and tired she was.
“That’s it from us, folks, my wife needs a shower,” Jamie pinches Phoebe’s cheek as Phoebe blushes, swatting her hand away.
She turns to Harry for a second and he’s just standing there, arms folded with an expression she’s unable to read, and Julien laughs, muttering something about catching a black cab since she now has money to waste.
Everyone leaves and it’s only them, and Charlotte comes closer to her as she nudges her hip with hers, “Hey. Is it cool if Harry gives you a ride? Tom’s picking me up.”
She panics and gives her a puzzled look. A car ride with Harry. Alone. Just the two of them.
She swallows, “How come you never mention it?”
“He just texted me, we’re driving up to Manc. Will you be okay?” She reaches and strokes her cheek, then turns to Harry, as if the question was directed at both of them.
“Well, yeah...I mean- I’ll call a Bolt or something-”
“It’s fine, I can give you a ride,” Harry says, hands now in his pockets. He looks like he’s cold too, considering how he’s only wearing a thin shirt and his chest is on full display, letting the breeze softly lick at the flesh.
“I wouldn’t want to be a bother, I can take a Bolt. Really, it’s fine.”
“I insist...whereabouts is your place?”
“Ehm,” she sniffs and her eyes look for Charlotte for a moment, and when she spots her, she’s watching them despite the phone pressed against her ear. “Marylebone.”
“Great! That alright with you?”
She looks at Charlotte again, the short haired girl failing to meet her gaze, and she turns to Harry again, lips pursed, “I guess- I mean...sure. Okay.”
Harry beams at that, the dimple on his left cheek widening with the smile, and she wants to reach out and touch it, place her finger there. She doesn’t though. Instead, she gives him a smile and looks down at her boots, feeling all giddy inside with the realisation that she’d be alone with Harry for a while and it would also be away from any prying eyes, in the warmth of his car.
Charlotte comes back and reaches for her, giving her a big hug as she buries her head in her neck, and she involuntarily breathes in the smell of cigarettes and Charlotte’s personal favourite, Chanel no. 5.
“Text me when you’re home, yeah? And text me if you need anything...he’s nice, I promise,” she whispers the last part, as if she’s letting her in on a secret, then reaches for Harry to give him a hug.
“Drive safe,” she says, walking backwards, “I mean it.”
“I will. Precious cargo, am I right?”
Harry opens the door for her and waits for her to get in, her lips form the words ‘thank you’, and once they’re both inside, seatbelts on, Harry sighs and tries to fix his creased shirt. She watches his hands, the rings catching the light coming from a lamppost outside, creating beams, and she notices the single, nearly-chipped gold nail polish on his left pinky.
“So…” they both say at the same time and he laughs, shaking his head, and a few strands fall to his eyes.
She chuckles too, eyes falling to her hands on her lap as she fiddles with them. “I think we’ve been set up,” she mumbles and looks up at him, finding him watching her carefully with one hand on the steering wheel and the other on his thigh.
“Yeah? You think so?”
“Oh, yeah. I’m usually not this dumb.”
“Maybe you wanted play dumb, hm?” He gives her a smile, causing her to scoff, and he surprises them both when his left hand reaches to stroke her cheek, making goosebumps appear on her skin and she swears she could hear her breath hitch at the warm touch, feeling hot all over.
They stare at each other, his hand still on her cheek, and she swallows, “Sure, whatever you say.”
“Is this okay?” He asks, gesturing at the touch, voice as soft and smooth as honey.
She nods, because it is. It is more than okay and if it were up to her, they’d already be kissing, tasting each other’s dirty, sweaty skin and touching each other all over, feeling each other’s bodies...she wanted all of that.
She swallows again, his gaze shifting from her face to her neck, then lower and lower until it reaches her boobs. They look divine, he thinks, despite the lack of lighting in his car, they look absolutely gorgeous, sort of spilling out from the lace material and he gulps, hand beginning to make its way down to her neck. He rests it there as long fingers caress the side of her neck, discovering a few moles there, and he looks up at her, only to find her eyes fixed on his lap. He looks down to, the slight tent not coming as a surprise, and he gives her a grin, the other hand coming to rest atop his bulge.
“Hm?” He hums as he waits for her answer despite knowing what she would say.
She clears her throat and looks around, seeing the almost empty parking lot all dark except the stop sign near the exit, and turns her attention back to Harry.
“Yes. It’s okay.”
“Mmm,” his fingers curl around her throat, thumb stroking the flesh there, “Thank you, love. Can I kiss you?”
“You can...Please,” she practically moans when his thumb presses a sweet spot on her neck and he gives her a smile, hand reaching to unbuckle both of their seatbelts with a click.
It doesn’t happen that fast. First, he gives her a look, almost as if he’s trying to remember where her lips are and the nose, then her eyes...he keeps looking, and looking, and he brings his hand up to her mouth, resting his thumb on her bottom lip as her eyes shift downwards with the movement. While he watches her, she takes her time to watch him, his face, and she feels something bubbling inside her, much like the bubbles that rise to the top when you open a coke bottle.
Pressure, she thinks, pressure and the need to devour him. Thus, without thinking too much, she reaches and grabs him by the nape of his neck, his hand falling atop the car seat as their lips meet, both of them hungry for each other’s touch as their teeth clash and Harry lets out a hiss when she bites his bottom lip, suckining it into her mouth.
His hands go up to her cheeks, pushing her far enough to look into her face and eyes in particular and he smiles, the inside of his palms feeling the soft peach fuzz on her face. When she lunges forward to continue their kiss, he stops her, thumb stroking her cheekbones as she lets out a huff, and he chuckles, “Slow, baby, slow. We’ve got time. I want to feel you, taste you as much as I can, yeah?”
She nods, letting him stroke the side of her face some more and feel her skin against his soft hands before he starts leaning in, this time slow, so slow that it feels like hours to her. Before she closes her eyes, she catches a glimpse of his pink tongue dart out to lick his lips, and he finally captures her top lip, sucking it into his mouth softly and she melts under his touch, her mouth pursed as she starts responding with her own kisses. Their lips, she feels, fit together like a puzzle piece.
Harry’s tongue swipes across her bottom lip and she opens wider, letting him lick into her mouth further. It’s hot, wet, and she feels herself getting wetter and wetter as the smooch noises grow louder with each kiss. His hands are now cupping both of her cheeks, and as he presses wet pecks on her parted mouth, one of his thumbs travel down to her mouth and he stops their kiss, and she opens her eyes, giving him a puzzled look.
He shushes her, lips pursed as he does so, and her eyes watches the movement, wanting to feel them all over her body now that she knows how he feels and tastes like. He presses his thumb against her bottom lip, then into her mouth and pulls her closer to him. He shuts his eyes and tilts his head when she closes her mouth around his thumb, sucking it like a lolly, and his cock twitches in his trousers again as he watches the way she sucks on his flesh, humming around it as if she’s having the most delicious meal of her life.
“Fuck, baby,” he rasps, “Y’like playing with me, don’t you?”
She doesn’t respond. Instead, she takes his thumb out of her mouth with a pop and she holds him by the wrist, placing his hand on one of her boobs and Harry lets her warm hands and the feeling of lace overpower him as he gives her boob a squeeze, then travels his hand down to where he supposes her nipple is and brushes a thumb over it, a beaming grin stretching across his face when he feels her pebbled nipple under his thumb.
When he looks at her face, she’s biting her lips, eyes shut, and he bites his own lips as he traps her covered nipple between his thumb and index finger, tweaking it gently which causes her to breathe out a moan, toes curling involuntarily inside her boots. He tugs at it, then his hand travels up and he looks at her, as if to ask her permission for what he’s about to do. And she nods, of course she does, and she feels her upper torso getting sore from the position they’ve been in but she lets it go, reaching for his hand near her boob and places it on top of his, encouraging him to keep going.
With her hand on top of his, he slides the bodysuit down from the top, and he feels his cock twitch in interest so he has to bring his other hand down to press against his bulge over his trousers in hopes of relieving some of the tension. He plays with her nipple, tweaking and squeezing it between his fingers before finally leaning to capture the pebbled nipple into his mouth. “God damn, your tits...so fuckin’ hot, baby,” he bites her nipple and she shudders, back arching in pleasure. “Wanna do everything with you...wanna fuck you- wanna fuck these tits,” he whispers against her nipple, now wet with his spit, and his hot breath sends chills down her spine.
It’s warm, his mouth, so warm and wet around her hard nipples and she lets out another moan, arms wrapping around his neck and she tries to press against him closer. “Fuck,” a moan leaver her mouth, “Please, Harry, fuck me. Do something, just- ‘m so wet.”
“Yeah? Want me to fuck you? Jesus,” he presses a kiss to her nipple before he frees her other boob from the fabric, “You’re so fuckin’ hot. Got me so fuckin’ hard, just look at these gorgeous tits, baby. Bet your cunt’s even more gorgeous, hm?” He whispers, hands already on the other boob, squeezing the nipple and he watches as it hardens, looking so pretty and puckered for him and he gets his mouth on that one too, licking across the nipple before he bites it into his mouth.
“Can I take this off, sweetheart?” He touches her shoulder, squeezing her there over the blazer, and when he sees the hesitation in her eyes, he travels his hand up to her neck and strokes it there, “Y’don’t have to, darling. However you’re comfortable.”
“No,” she says ever so softly, “It’s okay.”
He smiles at her as she takes the jacket off and throws it somewhere at her feet. Harry grabs her by the neck and brings her in for another kiss but this time, it’s slow. And sweet. Slow, sweet, and warm, so warm that she feels it in her chest, in her stomach, and it reaches everywhere, the kiss warming anything and everything inside her. He swipes a tongue across her bottom lip before pulling away, and places both hands on her boobs, squeezing them, mouth popping open as he watches them in awe.
“Fuckin’ hell,” he brings one of his hands to the front of his trousers and the heels of his palms press against the bulge, but instead of giving him some relief, the touch makes him hiss, wishing for something softer, warmer.
“Can I fuck you? I need to fuck you, please, sweetheart,” he whispers and she nods, tongue darting out to lick her dry lips and he nods as well, looking around inside the car, swiftly examining the tinted black windows before he turns to her, “I hate that I’m about to fuck that pretty pussy in the backseat of my car instead of a comfortable bed but I need it so bad, sweetheart, I need you,” he licks his lips, “That okay?”
“Yes...more than.”
He helps her move to the backseat, boobs still hanging from the top, and he joins her in the backseat quickly. They’re closer now, nothing serving as a barrier between them, and with the way they’re facing each other, she can make out a tiny pimple on the side of his nose as well as a little mole on his forehead. Her gaze falls to his bulge again, and he’s already fumbling to get them off. With a swallow, she shuts her eyes so she doesn’t see Harry watching her intently, dilated pupils fixated on her sweaty skin, her lips in particular.
He leans in and presses an open mouth kiss to her damp skin, the touch making her open her eyes.
Take it off” she whispers, voice as sweet as honey, “Come on, I want you to fuck me,” she breathes against his hair, his head now in the crook of her neck, and she feels him nod, his hands coming to rest atop hers.
He fumbles with the button with shaky hands, her hands coming to rest on Harry’s waist and he sighs in relief when he hears the zipper. He lowers his trousers along with his underwear clumsily, the pile of material pooling around his ankles. He’s hard and leaking already, the tip an angry shade of red, and she takes a few seconds to admire the thickness of his cock and how pretty it looks, his dark, coarse pubic hair making her mouth water as she imagines deepthroating him, nuzzling the hair at the base of his cock.
Harry looks up and she’s got one hand on her boob while the other rubs herself through her jeans, presumably feeling aroused with the way the fabric is feeling against her pussy. A low, choked ‘fuck’ leaves his mouth following a growl as his long fingers begin unbuttoning the beige shirt and she watches, bottom lip trapped between her teeth with fingers rubbing herself.
Once it’s unbuttoned, he’s quick to get his hands on her jeans, eyes briefly searching for something in hers before he starts unbuttoning them. She stops him and bends over to take her boots off and he watches her back, hand reaching involuntarily to travel his fingers down her spine, stroking her waist before he bends forward to place a kiss on there as she keeps fumbling with her boots. Once they’re off, he’s quick to help her get the jeans off too, and he throws them in the front seat, smiling when she hears her giggle.
“Alright, Miss Giggles?” he says softly, palm resting on top of her thigh as one of his hands reaches and strokes the side of her face, fingers playing in her wild strands of hair.
She bites her lip again, giving him a nod, and he brings her face into his, lips pressing a tender kiss to her chin before he opens his mouth slightly and grazes his teeth across the flesh, and he presses a final, loud kiss there before he pulls away with a pop, leaving her chin all shiny and wet with his saliva. He lowers his eyes and spots her thong, fabric too tiny and flimsy to cover all the areas of her pussy, and he lets out a groan at the sight, hand immediately reaching to touch what’s under her little thong.
“So pretty, darling...so, so pretty,” he murmurs and she watches with parted legs as he positions his middle finger against her pussy over the black lace, thin, so he feels just how warm and wet she is between her folds. This makes him pause to look down at his cock, just to make sure he’s not about to spill all over the carseat since he feels the pleasure at the tip of his cock, ready to explode right then and there. “How can anyone ever resist you, hm? This pretty girl…” with one hand still between her legs, he reaches with his other hand and ghosts his thumb over her nipple, his other hand working her thong as he pulls it to the side, “...this pretty pussy,” he murmurs, making her eyes lull shut at the compliments.
She parts her legs wider to give him more room to work with, and he grins as he looks up at her hungry eyes, knowing what she’s asking for. And god, is he about to give her what she wants. The way she looks, not just half naked but from the moment he’d caught a glimpse of the grumpy girl across the room, it’s been driving him insane. Not that she was rude or looked bored, but she looked cute, kinda nervous, as if she too was as uncomfortable as Harry by the prying eyes and tipsy chatter around them.
From the moment they were introduced, Harry knew she didn’t particularly like to be looked at. Maybe he was being judgmental, or reading too much into things, but he got the impression that she was sort of nervous to be around people, especially new people. He tried his hardest not to be some weirdo, an utter creep who kept looking at the beautiful girl across him but truth be told, it wasn’t the first time Harry had seen the girl’s face.
He knew of her, stories about her, from Charlotte, and saw numerous photos and throwback videos of them on Charlotte’s Instagram, but he would never actually admit to the fact that he’d clicked on her tag on one of Charlotte’s posts, and scrolled through her feed for hours, giggling from time to time at her silly captions and numerous pictures of a Golden Retriever and a black cat cuddling.
Yes, he might have found her interesting, took a few screenshots of her posts where she proudly displayed her favourite reads, immediately ordering everything on there, and a few funny memes, but now with his middle finger circling her clit, he would never, ever admit any of that to anyone, ever.
“Harry,” she breathes, and it sounds sort of harsh, rough even, the reason presumably being a mix of the cigarettes she’d been smoking and the way his finger teasingly, slowly moves over her pussy. “Harry…” she says again, melodiously, fingers curling around his wrist and he looks up with a grin, eyes almost evil, dark and pupils dilated from hunger bubbling up inside him.
He retracts his finger and brings it up to his mouth slowly, her eyes watching him like a hawk, and his pink tongue darts out, licking a long stripe up his middle finger and he truly devours the savoury taste, eyes finding hers as he sucks the finger into his mouth. “Taste so good, sweetheart,” he murmurs, “Want me to play with that beautiful cunt, hm? Give it my full attention?”
“Yes, please, I need it so bad, I’ve been waiting for so long.”
“Yeah?” He asks, ever so softly, “How long?” He presses, his middle finger once again placed between her wet folds, and she wraps her fingers around his wrist.
There’s a bloom of pleasure in her voice when she lets out a shaky breath, a stuttered ’yeah’ because she doesn’t want to give in to Harry’s teasing game, and he leans forward, capturing her chin with his mouth as he bites the flesh while the pads of his finger massages slow and deep over her swollen clit.
He feels the spongy bit under his touch, “Tell me you’ve been thinking of this too,” he breathes against her wet chin, then brings his middle finger down to her hole. It’s wet, so fucking wet when he drags his finger back up and circles her clit faster than before which makes her legs kick out in pleasure, one hand grabbing harshly at her boob as the other go up to Harry’s soft hair and she pulls, fingernails scratching his scalp while doing so. He groans against her skin and drags his finger down to her slick little hole again, circling around the wet, soft muscle and he pushes his finger in, her cunt making a wet, lovely sound as he does so as his eyes fall to his throbbing cock.
It’s so hard, an unpleasant feeling blooming inside, so he takes his finger out of her hole, making her let out a tiny whimper as she clenches around nothing with the sudden loss of his touch. Harry brings his finger up to his mouth, and his pink tongue darts out to lick, mouth closing around to devour the slightly salty slickness.
“Can I fuck you now?” He asks as his hand goes to stroke the side of her neck, goosebumps appearing immediately at the touch. She shudders, unable to respond and Harry’s voice is softer this time, “Can I, baby? Will you let me fuck your pretty pussy now? I need it so bad, sweetheart, so fucking bad. See how hard I am for you? So fucking hard for you, baby.”
“God,” another shaky breath, “Please, I’m so wet and horny- I need it, Harry, please.”
“Need my cock, yeah? Need me to fill that little hole? Stretch your tiny little hole, darling?”
“Fuck- please, I- please stop teasing me, I need it...please, fuck me.”
Harry feels something, a prickly sensation inside him, his groin tightening, and he knows it’s her dirty mouth and sweet face to blame. He looks down at his cock, hard as rock between his legs, and grabs her by the waist, pulling her on top of him with ease. “There, sweet girl.”
He lets out a hiss when her warm pussy makes contact with his cock and she bites her lip, leaning forward until their sweaty foreheads meet. “Your pussy’s so fuckin’ warm. Shit, we need condoms,” a strong arm wraps around her waist and she gasps when he leans forward so suddenly. His face is buried into her boobs as he tries to retrieve his wallet from one of the compartments in between and she watches him struggle, unable to control a tiny laugh escaping her mouth.
“Well,” Harry mumbles, warm lips making her skin feel all tingly, “This is lovely...mmm,” a few kisses are pressed between her boobs, then another open mouth one on her left nipple, and they’re finally back to their previous position, condom package between Harry’s lips as he rips the top, never once taking his eyes off of her while doing so.
“Ready for me?” He gives himself a few lazy pulls, thumbing at the tip while she watches, one hand kneading her boob. “Hm? Ready to take my cock?” He moves his hand slowly, up and down, causing her to swallow.
“Yeah...fuck yeah. Please, fuck me.”
He looks up at her as the rubber works its way down his cock, and she joins her arms around his neck, fingers playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck, and he brings his cock to her cunt, earning a moan from her, her warm breath licking at his face ever so softly. He grunts, voice strained with pleasure when he feels how warm and wet she is at the touch of his cock and slides it against her warmth before he brings it down to her tight little hole and pauses there.
“Y’ready, sweet girl?” He nudges their foreheads together and it’s sweet, so sweet despite the position they’re in, and she nods, feeling their damp foreheads stick together, and Harry gives her a bright smile, dimple appearing on his left cheek.
And he pushes it in. With his thumb pressed against the tip, he pushes his cock inside her, the tightness squeezing his already sensitive cock as if she doesn’t want to let him go, as if she wants to keep him inside of her forever and ever.
“God, such a tight cunt, baby. Squeezing me already, hm?” He murmurs into her mouth, “Easy, darling...slow. Slow, yeah? Want to feel you properly,” his hands go up to her hips, holding her there to still the movement of her hips, and her arms loop around his sweaty neck, fingernails scratching the back of his neck and he hisses, face moving forward to press a bruising kiss on her parted mouth.
Once she calms down, hips stilled, his strong arms begin moving her up and down and they both moan, quick breaths leaving their mouths and mixing together just like how their bodies are almost joined together, two becoming one, and Harry starts moving his own hips so he can fuck into her as she helps her by moving her own hips up and down, slowly, just like he’d asked her to, feeling his cock stretching her tight hole with his every move. There’s a honking outside and both their movements still for a second, and a muffled chuckle leaves her mouth, arms tightening around Harry’s neck.
Their eyes meet, Harry’s mouth turning upwards, “What’s so funny, Miss Giggles, hm?” He murmurs as his hips speed up again, their skins slapping against each other as his cock strokes the insides of her walls ever so softly, sliding in and out of her.
“Jesus, you’re so fucking big, I- I knew you’d be big but...fuck, you’re so good, so fucking good, Harry,” she moans, earning a grunt from him as she meets his thrusts, her hands sliding down to Harry’s shoulders and squeezing his smooth skin briefly before she brings her palms down to her chest.
She strokes the hair on his chest, admiring the way his cross necklace sits proudly there, amongst his now damp chest hair, and she brings her palm to one of his nipples, thumb stroking the slightly darker nub and he lets out a groan as goosebumps appear on his chest and nipples.
“God,” she breathes and Harry can smell the fruity-sour alcohol on her breath, and his mouth pops open when she tweaks his sensitive nipples. “I love your nipples,” she moans again when his cock brushes that sweet spot inside her and he does too, arms tightening around her waist, and she tweaks his nipples again, this time harder as her hips speed up, ass slapping against his meaty thighs and she keeps jumps up on down on his cock.
As she does so, her boobs too move, bouncing up and down with her every movement and Harry reaches with one hand, capturing one of her nipples between his fingers as he tweaks left and right before letting it go, watching her skin prickle at the touch.
“Shit, y’feel amazing, just wanna keep you forever,” he groans, low and delirious, fingernails digging into her waist as he thrusts into her, “So fuckin’ tight around me...so tight and snug. I want you- want this everyday. Wanna be able to touch you, kiss that little face everyday, fuck this beautiful pussy...so good, darling, you’re so fuckin’ good, letting me fuck that sweet cunt in the backseat, hm? Are you good,” he breathes her name into her mouth, then bites her bottom lip, earning a gasp from her when his thrusts become particularly rough. “Are you a good girl?”
“Yes, yes, yes, I’m good, I’m so good, please- I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna fucking cum please keep fucking me, keep fucking me hard, Harry- keep going,” she speeds up her movements, Harry’s cock sliding in and out of her as wet, dirty sounds fill the car and he curses under his breath, hips lifting off the seat to meet her strokes.
“Are you close?” He manages to ask, a low grunt in his voice.
She doesn’t respond. Instead, she brings one hand down to her pussy and begins rubbing her clit, moaning when she touches the little nub and then, with her other hand, she reaches for Harry’s face, thumb stroking the side of the smooth skin before she places it on his bottom lip and presses hard, making him part his mouth. She pushes it in, eyes lulling shut at the feeling of his warm tongue as he sucks on her thumb, hips continuing their movements as he fucks her cunt with quick, rough thrusts.
When she opens her eyes, Harry’s watching her, sweat glistening on his forehead and she brings her finger down to where Harry’s cock meets her warmth and rubs the top of his cock, moaning when she feels the vein there. She brings it up to her clit again, all wet and warm, and she rubs harder with rough strokes as Harry juts his hips forward a few more times. “I’m gonna cum, fuck- I’m gonna fuckin’ cum, baby,” his grip tightens on her waist and she places her hands on his shoulder, squeezing there.
“Come on me, I want it on my tits,” she mutters, fingernails digging into the smooth skin of his shoulders and he lets out a grunt, pulling out quickly as she gets down, Harry’s legs parting immediately so she can get between them.
And she does, gets on her knees between Harry’s parted legs as he takes the condom off, hissing at the feeling as he tosses it somewhere on the floor, and he begins stroking his now-wet cock as she thumbs at her nipples, kneading her boobs before pushing them together. His wrist works harder and quicker at the sight and he finally comes undone, his warm cum spilling onto her boobs, decorating her soft flesh with white stripes and she looks down, watching with sparkling eyes.
“God, fuck,” he breathes, letting his head tilt back, “You’re something else, y’know that?”
She hums, sending him a grin as he gives himself three more lazy strokes before he lets go of his cock and watches the spattered cum against her skin separate with the movement when she lets them go.
“Got some on your top, sorry, love.”
She looks down, then swipes a thumb across her skin and brings it up to her mouth. Pushing it in, she sucks around her digit as she tastes the salty-sour taste and Harry watches, all wrecked and fucked out.
“It’s fine, don’t worry about it.”
“You’re so naughty...come up here,” his ring-clad fingers reach for her wrist and he helps her sit next to him.
He reaches the little pocket behind one of the seats, taking out some tissues as she watches him take out a few and clean her up as much as he can. Then their eyes meet, both sleepy and wrecked, and he lifts his hand up to her cheek, stroking it, and she leans into the touch, making him smile. “You’re lovely,” he mumbles, hand still on her cheek.
“You’re lovelier.”
He chuckles as she fixes her top, “You really are. Really lovely.”
“Stop it, I’m not good with compliments.”
“Well,” he shrugs, reaching for his trousers on the front seat, “I said what I said. You hungry? Thirsty?”
“I’m kinda thirsty. Aren’t you?”
As they lean against the bonnet of Harry’s car, now parked outside a McDonald’s, there’s a comfortable silence between them as they sip their waters, bodies close to each other, close enough for Harry to smell his faint cologne on her skin.
“You cold still?” He turns to her as she takes a bite of her chocolate muffin, and he follows as a few crumbs land on her chest.
“I’m good. Feel very warm...ed up,” she chuckles, thumbing at the corners of her mouth.
Harry groans, nudging her with his shoulders and she nudges back, harder, and he gasps, “Oi, be nice. I’m feeding you.”
“Soz. Guess I owe you like...what is it, a fiver?”
“You’re a very mean girl.”
“I’m the nicest. I’m good,” she gives him a grin, earning another eye roll from him as she takes another sip of her water before placing it on the floor, “Seriously though, thanks for the muffin.”
���Don’t mention it. I’m kinda bummed you turned down the nuggets but…maybe next time?”
“Next time?” She asks, crossing her arms, trying to warm herself up despite her promise from earlier.
“Well,” he clears his throat, hand going up to his necklace, “I’d love to see you sometime. Again. Preferably for longer than an hour and...you know, just us two? Hanging out?”
She smiles and leans forward, taking him by surprise when she presses their lips together. It’s a sweet, slow kiss, and his hands grab the back of her neck, pressing their faces closer as they kiss. Her hands find his waist and she gets on her feet, coming to stand between his legs without breaking their kiss, and she loops her arms around his neck, smiling when he moans at the feeling of her fingers playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck.
He tastes the muffin, the chocolate, and himself, and as foolish as it sounds, he wishes there was a way to be closer to her somehow, closer than they already are at this moment. She pulls away, their foreheads pressing together as they smile at each other.
Harry scrunches his nose and smiles, bringing it forward so their noses touch, “What was that for?” He whispers, hands tight around her waist as he hugs her closer.
“Just felt like it...just felt like kissing you.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I like kissing you. I liked kissing you a lot tonight.”
He smiles, nose booping against hers once again, “I liked kissing you a lot too. I’d like to kiss you a lot tomorrow. And maybe the day after that.”
“That’s fine by me. You can kiss me tomorrow...and the day after that,” she whispers, pressing their bodies together.
Harry closes his eyes, taking a deep breath as she watches with curious gaze, eyes crinkling with a smile.
“What are you doing,” she whispers, and he shushes her, smiling when he opens his eyes to find her staring with her eyebrows raised, “What are you doing?” She asks again and he squeezes her waist, forehead pressing against her once again and he leans in closer to press a tiny kiss on the corner of her mouth.
“I’m listening,” he whispers, lips almost touching hers as he speaks.
“Listening? What are you listening to?”
He strokes her cheek, “A song.”
She raises her eyebrow again, “What song? I can’t hear it. Are you- you’re not actually serious, are you?”
“Ssh, it’s a song. Listen,”
“Har-ry,” she groans, pressing her forehead on the crook of his neck, “What is it?”
Harry smiles, arms hugging her closer as she presses a tiny kiss to the side of his neck, “Aubade.”
SEND ME YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT AUBADE AND PLEASE REBLOG THE FICS YOU’VE READ AND ENJOYED TO SUPPORT AND MOTIVATE WRITERS <3
#harry styles#harry styles imagine#harry styles smut#harry styles fluff#harry styles x reader#harry styles one shot#harry styles x y/n
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would you consider doing an au where dream is a high school teacher (maybe a math teacher or english teacher or something?) and he has been crushing on his colleague, maybe an english teacher or an art teacher, and his friends have been teasing him quite a bit for it since he hasn’t had the courage to ask them out, which is quite weird considering he’s usually so confident, but it’s just a lot of flirting and shyness between the two until he final caves and asks them out? maybe even some of the students had begun to call him out on not acting on it? it’s perfectly okay if you don’t wanna do this but thank you for reading it :))
you + me = <3 | dreamwastaken
(math teacher!dream, gn!reader, dream likes u oooooh, cute kids, writer knows nothing about chess or how chess tournaments work, you requested high school but i can’t read so i chose middle school sorry!! this is literally nothing like you requested pls forgive me but i has fun, proceed with caution)
song to listen to: roadtrip by dream
i am setting the scene to say that teacher!dream is hot!!!! like, rolled up sleeves and leather watch kind of hot !!!!!!!
dream with fluffy waves that he sometimes ties into a bun if it gets too hot,,, brown roots and blond hair, brown eyebrows, forest green eyes,,,,,, freckles,,,,,
teaches middle school math!! very patient w his kids!!! but also has been known to go on tangents so long that they last until the bell rings
he’s the teacher whose classroom the weird/shy kids sit in at lunch
reads up on his students special interests and tries to ask them about it and encourage them
doesn’t make kids write out their entire process during testing bc he understands some students work in their head and can’t <3
works with different methods to help each kid learn math in their own way
the sweetest ever omg i can’t imagine a nicer teacher than dream
has a open-policy snack cabinet in case some of the kids can’t buy their lunch
has rlly cheesy anti bullying posters on his wall but actually talks to his students about it and makes sure they know he is someone they can go to
okay this is supposed to be a love story not an i heart teacher dream story sorry
you’re the art teacher of the middle school!!! you are also one of the favorites when it comes to teachers
dream is sort of a practical logical comforter and you’re a more dreamy, imagination-based comforter
so the kids ofc have their favorites
you’re a wonderful teacher !!!!
you let the kids use art class as a sort of art therapy, giving them time to do whatever they want with colors and mediums of their choosing
and assignments are usually fun!! you make it fun by giving them good topics that encourage them to express their opinions and personalities !!!
dream has the FATTEST crush on you
it’s so big and he’s very bad at hiding it
literally buys an extra coffee friday morning
slips into your classroom like “oh? hey ___ ? didn’t expect you to be here!!”
you: “in my own classroom?”
dream: “ANYWHO!! they messed up my order AGAIN and gave me a caramel frappe instead of a matcha so you can have it”
he does this every week
new excuses sometimes but it’s always ur favorite flavor, sitting right beside his matcha in a lil cup holder
dream is the type of guy to make sure your fingertips touch when he hands you your cup
so he can blush about it later and pretend it means something
any time he needs supplies or something he goes to you first instead of the communal supply closet
during his break he’ll come in and try to talk to you while your kids are painting
you sometimes sit with him during lunch!! and the kids that all sit in his classroom love you, even if they don’t have art
and every time you do he stutters over his own words and his neck gets rlly red
the kids all give each other side eyes when he does this
math kids 🤝 art kids : tired of witnessing dream’s bad flirting skills
dream brings you a cupcake on your birthday and a little necklace w a crystal on it :/
“i googled crystals for protection!! because i want u safe always!! and i made sure it was sustainably sourced!! let me know if you don’t like it!!”
how could you not like it :(
his eyes are wide and almost worried and when you give him a big smile he gets so happy like :((
your students are just. super still behind their easels hoping this is the moment you’ll actually kiss him
but no
it isn’t until a few of your kids come up one day and ask about forming an official chess club
they need at least one teacher willing to supervise and go on tournament trips and stuff
half of the team asks you and the other asks dream
but they don’t communicate that to each other
so it’s a saturday when both you and dream show up to the school in your casual clothes, unlocking one of the rooms for the kids to practice in
you help some kids set up while dream takes a few to the side and begins to teach them the basics, since not everyone who joins is an actual player
some just wanted to be w their friends ^u^!!!
but dream keeps catching your eye over the sea of middle schoolers and it makes your cheeks heat up whether u want them to or not
the two of you becoming the unofficial parents of the middle school chess team; you take turns supervising but usually both go to trips for tournaments!!
there are six students who make up the chess team + a few who just come for the snacks and respite
and your team is actually so good they qualify for state
and it’s going to be an overnight trip !!
some parents have also agreed to come chaperone
the team is so excited!!! the entire team got to go even though only a few are competing
theres a lot of lovely support going around
your kids are expressive and bright, all wearing special t-shirts they made that count as “uniforms”
they are twelve and dgaf about what ANYONE has to say
puffy markers and all
and before the tournament they surprise u and dream with ur own shirts :(( they are so sweet omg
and ofc you and dream wear them!!! fashion be damned!!!!!
the shirts are like MR WASTAKEN LOVES HIS CHESS TEAM
TEACHER ___ LOVES THEIR CHESS TEAM
AND THERES AN IRON-ON PICTURE OF YOU GUYS AND UR KIDS — EVERYBODY IS CHEESING AND ITS JUST SO SO CUTE
man they just look up to you guys so much
they really needed a place to fit in and your club gave them that
even the ones who are HORRIBLE at chess are sitting in the bleachers with you guys, cheering on their friends ><!!
it’s all so wholesome omg
and your team ends up qualifying !!!!!!!! it’s huge !!!!!!! you all go out for celebratory milkshakes sponsored by mr wastaken !!!!!
and everyone falls asleep with a big smile on their face that night
the next day is full of driving,, and you and dream share a lil seat at the back of the bus
all the kids are winding down, listening to music or playing games on their phones
and dream is so warm, shoulder pressed against yours when he hands you one of his earbuds and is like ,,,, do you want to listen to music with me?
and ofc you do
so the two of you take turns picking songs
dream adds them all later to a playlist called ___ and dream’s epic roadtrip playlist
now that interstate is paved with memories amirite?
once all the kids are picked up at the school, you are about to call your roommate to come pick you up
but dream is like. i can drive you home
dream is that guy who drives with one hand and keeps the other on top of the gear shift <3
you’re just excitedly recounting all the kid’s faces and all the silly stories you were told in the hotel when dream is finally at your apartment complex
and he just bursts
“i really like you”
and you’re just. stunned bc you knew he was fond of you but you never thought he’d be brave enough to SAY it
“i like you too dream!!”
“would it be too cheesy to walk you to your door and kiss you goodbye?”
“maybe... but i like cheesy.”
thank you for requesting!!!
#I fully believe dream is horrible at flirting#dreamwastaken au#dreamwastaken x you#dreamwastaken x reader#dreamwastaken fanfic#mcyt au#mcyt fluff#mcyt x reader
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New Romantics | Part Three
18+
Summary: She needs help studying for her Case Exercises at the Academy, He needs a date for the annual Banquet... they just so happen to be neighbours who aren't afraid to lend a helping hand, or in this case, a helping kiss.
Categories: Fake dating, neighbours, strangers to lovers, mutual pining, Angst with a happy ending, Smut *as selected by my poll on what you wanted to read*
Warnings: Season 9 Spencer (no Maeve arc), Angst, kissing, drinking, police training mentions, case details, canon typical violence, self-doubt, autistic!spencer, age gaps (24/33), FWB relationships, period mentions, anxiety attacks, crying, misunderstandings,
Word Count: 4.7K
a/n: this chapter covers the whole week from Monday to Friday, thank you @awrfhi for making the gif I used here <3
Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five
Monday morning she’s in his arms still, and then again on Tuesday; he basically lives with her when he’s not on a case. They make dinner together at night and they drive in together every morning, and they have had sex all over her apartment… and he loves her but he was tired when he said it and in a post-orgasm haze and he’s her best friend.
But he loved her— just not the way she loved him. She was sure of it.
Tuesday morning at 10:53 am, she cracks her fake case. They’re apprehending the unsub by Noon and then she has the rest of the week off. So she heads to the main Quantico building, she gets a visitor's pass and she takes the elevator all the way up to the BAU.
She walks through the bullpen doors and Spencer is sitting at his little desk with his head buried in a book. Penelope sees her first, wrapping her up in a hug that gets everyone’s attention as she rocks her back and forth while telling her how much she likes her.
“You are so pretty, and nice and cute, and your hair smells so good?”
“Thank you, it’s Spencer's shampoo,” she laughs as she holds her back, “I just wanted to come and see him really quick?”
He’s standing beside her and she doesn’t even know until Penelope releases her from her grasp. He wraps her up next, “why didn’t you tell me you were coming?”
She kisses him right on the mouth, holding his face in her hands she has missed him too much to wait till they are alone again, “I caught the unsub.”
“No way?”
She nods feverishly, “yeah remember I found that stray hair on the crime scene? Everyone was fighting over why there wasn’t a sexual aspect and I was trying to convince them she was a women unsub when the hair came back matching our victims best friend, who also knew victim number 1.”
He’s so happy, his smile is the biggest any of his teammates have ever seen, he lifts her and twirls her around and no one can believe the sight. Spencer Reid the uptight, overly smart, always following proper procedure, Doctor at the FBI; was spinning his girlfriend around as he kissed her cheek.
“You are a genius,” he compliments her as he sets her back down and places another kiss on her lips.
“I know,” she laughs, “I beat your score by one day.”
“I hate you,” he kisses her again and by now they don’t realize they have an audience. It’s incredibly convincing to everyone except each other.
“No, you love me,” she whispers, kissing him again before they hear someone clear their throat.
“Do you want to help with ours?” Derek asks, jumping into the moment and reminding them that they’re in public. “We’re just doing non-urgent consults today.”
“Am I allowed?” She lights up.
Derek nods, “I don’t see why not, as long as you just tell your ideas to us and don’t file anything then I think it’s legal?”
So she helps and it’s the most exhilarating thing since having sex with Spencer. She’s in her element, looking at small details and making connections that even leave Spencer humming and ha-ing. She has a younger insight than the rest of the team, she’s exactly why they hired Spencer in the first place and now she was shining brighter than him.
But he loved it.
Every time she made a connection or she had a suggestion that helped one of them on their own train of thought, Spencer would smile at her like she hung the stars in the night sky. He was proud of her in a way she hasn’t seen in many people before, filling her heart with warmth and hope that maybe he can love her for real one day.
—
She was possibly the love of his life and the more he saw her work and the more he knew her mind; the more he fell. She walked around his office and talked to his friends as if she was always meant to be there, and a part of him really wanted her to be.
He snuck away to go talk to Hotch, closing his office door as he sat down, “what’s wrong?”
“Y/N isn’t really my girlfriend,” he whispers. “She’s pretending so I could get everyone to stop bothering me about dating, and I understand it looks like she’s using me to get close to the team but I really do think she would be an excellent asset to the unit even if she was just in the office—“
“Reid,” Hotch cuts him off and a smile builds. “I already sent her an offer to take Anderson's job while he’s out on paternity leave.”
“Oh,” he smiles to himself. “Pretend I never said anything.”
“It stays in these 4 walls, don’t worry,” Hotch smiles back, “but you should tell her.”
“Tell her what?”
“That you’re in love with her.”
“I’m not,” he lies, “really, I do love her but I’m not in love with her, there is a difference.”
“I know,” Hotch reminds him. “Did you know that I only joined the school musical to get close to Haley? I did whatever I could to get her to fall in love with me and didn’t even realize it when she did because I was so worried she didn’t.”
“Oh.”
Hotch nods with another smile, “you don’t have to tell her until you’re ready, obviously, but you should tell her before it’s too late.”
“I will,” he whispers. “Thanks, Aaron.”
“Why don’t you guys head out early?” He offers, “we could all use a day off with the people we love.”
When he walks back down from Aaron's office, Y/N is with Emily and JJ discussing how she caught her fake unsub at school that morning. She doesn’t brag, she loves to mention her classmates by name and verbatim explains how they helped her. She is a team player, a genius, beautiful, kind… she really is the love of his life.
“Hey,” he places his hand on her lower back as he slides into the conversation. “Hotch said we can all leave early if we wanted?”
“Sure,” she smiles, “actually, did you want to come with me to buy a dress for your thing?”
“That would be fun,” he agrees, wrapping his other arm around her so he can rest his chin on her shoulder and hold her. “Remember I’m buying it so don’t stress about the price.”
“You’re too nice to me,” she replies.
“I just love you,” his voice is as low as he can make it but everyone still hears.
She holds him back tighter, in a silent ‘I love you, too’ and they hear JJ and Emily swoon.
They’re quick to get their things and head out, she hands Spencer her keys and lets him drive to the mall so she can relax, she’s done a lot today.
She’s so quiet on the drive, she holds his hand like she always does and she just looks out the window, she’s peaceful and content with the nothingness of spending alone time with Spencer. They were always just quiet together, sometimes they laughed till they cried and sometimes he could make her scream but most of the time they were quiet.
“Have you checked your email?”
She smiles as she turns to him and her grip on his hand tightened, “what did you do?”
“I didn’t do anything, I just told hotch the truth so that he could offer you a job, but he already had before I went in there but he’s a good secret keeper, believe me.”
“Oh,” her smile disappears. “So he knows we’re not really dating?”
He nods, “Is that okay?”
“Yeah, I guess we’re going to have to find a convincing way to break up for them and still be able to hang out all the time,” she worries aloud. “Because I don’t want to stop this any time soon, I hope you know that. I really like spending time with you.”
“I feel the same way,” he agrees. “I promise, we can just tell them we work better as friends and they might believe us?”
“I don’t think they will,” she frowns again. “JJ told me not to break your heart today, but I feel like if we break up I’m going to break all of theirs.”
“We could have a fake ugly breakup, and not talk to each other publicly for a bit and then be friends again?” He suggests, “Penelope and Kevin did that.”
She nods, still frowning. She interlocks their fingers this time and she holds his hand instead of just anxiously fiddling with his fingers. She really doesn’t want to let go, and he’s almost convinced she feels the same way.
The banquet is on Saturday, she has one last week of school before her graduation and then they’re done. He thinks about asking her, about what would be the best time to tell her he was in love with her and ask her to be his real girlfriend.
Maybe he’ll do it after the banquet? Maybe he’ll do it after her graduation? He just really wants to do it before she meets his mom. He wants his mom to meet her as the love of his life and his best friend.
He hated many things, but as he kept glancing at her as he drove he realized he hated one thing most of all. He hated that he couldn’t love her as much as she deserved, at least not yet. He wanted to shower her in love, he wanted to protect her and care for her, he wanted to show her off and make love to her and never leave her side.
It hurts, his heart physically aches as he thinks about that. If he had to feel like this to know his love was real, then the pain was worth it. She was always worth it, and he would hurt as long as possible, forever even, if it meant he could be around her just as long.
He held her hand tighter in the silence which made her turn to him, he had no idea he had been crying until she leans over and wipes his cheeks, “I love you, you know that?”
“I love you too,” he smiles but he can’t keep the conversation there, he’s feeling trapped and so he changes the topic. “What colour dress were you thinking?”
The quick-change makes her laugh, “probably black.”
“Are you sure?”
She nods, “I don’t need to stand out beside you any more than I already do.”
“What does that mean?”
She bits her lip, “some of the people in my class are saying that I’m only doing so well because you’re helping me cheat and that I’m just fucking you to get a job… just like I thought they would.”
“At the end of the day, we have a friendship they will never understand, we have great sex because we want to, you’re smarter than me, and the BAU wants you… so who is the real winner?” He’s always going to be her number one cheerleader.
“You’re right,” she smiles again finally, “as always.”
—
He convinces her to get a red dress.
She hasn’t had a pretty dress like this one since her prom and that was 6 years ago. She hasn’t been to a party or mingled with people in just as long, she didn’t realize how lonely she had been while chasing her dreams until Spencer came along.
He was one of the dreams. She saw him talk once, years ago on a school trip, and she fell in love with him a little, even back then. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to be him or be with him back then, doing everything in her power to get into the criminal psych degree at her local college, she just wanted to be like him.
Now she’s liked by him.
Every night he goes to his home across the hall and he does his own nightly routine before coming back to her apartment for the night. She’s too emotional to sleep with him today, she knows that if she has sex with him she’s going to say something stupid or cry after because being this close to him without being honest with him is killing her.
Something in him has changed too, he’s less scared to initiate contact, he doesn’t jump anymore when she hugs him or when she smacks his bum as she passes him. Now he’s wrapping his arms around her while she cooks dinner, and he kisses her cheek randomly when they’re in public.
He tells her that he loves her.
She’s confused and she has no one to talk to about it.
She lays back against her pillows and closes her eyes, she knows she’s going to cry soon, and she doesn’t know what to do because she doesn’t want to cry in front of him and he would be upset if she told him to not come back tonight.
The stress of the situation just makes her cry more as she stresses herself into another anxiety attack, much like the first night she talked to him. She just lets it happen, the anxiety in her stomach builds and the tears slip past her eyes and suddenly she’s sobbing into her pillow hard enough that she doesn’t hear him come back.
She jumps at the feeling of his hand on her back as he sits on the edge of the bed, “what’s wrong?”
She just sits up and hugs him, and he hugs her back and they stay there like that for a while. When she calms down, she pulls back from him and wipes her eyes, “my period is coming.” She’s not really lying, and he believes her.
“Does it normally make you this emotional?”
He’s never really experienced her mood swings, he has no idea what he’s in for, she nods. “Yeah, and I have really bad anxiety which just gets worse around this time.”
“And you’re not on anything?”
She shakes her head, “I’m waiting to get onto the good healthcare when I get a job with the bureau, I can’t afford to work and go to school, I’m glad I had enough scholarship money left to rent this place long enough to go to the academy.”
“Oh.”
She just nods, “I’ve never had much money like my parents have been saving for 2 years to buy plane tickets to Virginia so that they can see me graduate. They started saving before I even got in. I went to community college on a scholarship and I get a lot of money from applying for bursaries.”
“Are you going to take the CARD job or the BAU offer?”
She shrugs, “I’m not sure yet, but probably CARD.”
“Why?”
“I can’t work with you,” she whispers. “It makes me feel like I don’t deserve to be there like I’m using you and that all my work isn’t that great. I’m just Doctor Spencer Reids girlfriend.”
“I’m sorry you feel that way, imposter syndrome is a leading factor in depression among child prodigies, once you reach a certain age and you stop receiving awards for your work, it’s hard to believe that you’re still doing a good job.”
She knows he gets it, he has probably said the same fact to himself to calm down before. “Thank you.”
“Do you want me to stay?”
She nods, pulling back the covers and moving over so he can snuggle in beside her. She holds him, resting her head on his chest and taking a deep inhale of his cologne, this was the love of her life and if this was as close as she was ever going to be to him, she was going to take it.
He kisses the top of her head and holds her in his arms at just the right pressure to calm her down. She feels so comfortable with him but she still feels like shit, she doesn’t stop crying, and he just holds her through it.
“Do you want to tell me what’s really wrong?” He whispers after a while, he sounds worried.
“No,” she whispers. “I can’t.”
“Is it about me?”
“Yeah,” she cries again, “and I don’t have any other friends to talk to about us and now you’ve told hotch and I have no one to talk to about how this is kinda stressing me out.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” his voice is still scared and she knows he’s going to panic regardless and just send them around in a circle of constant anxiety. But his tone is more apologetic than one fuck up.
“Who else did you tell?” She sits up, “I thought this was just between us?”
“I needed advice, the same reason you are reacting right now, you’re stressing me out,” Spencer finally talks back with passion and she knows they’re about to fight for no reason.
“I never said you were stressing me out. I said our situation was, but I think I need to sleep alone now, Spencer” she’s confident and stern even though she’s crying.
“We can’t go to bed mad at each other. You even said the mornings are the worst, we can’t hate each other for no reason tomorrow,” he starts to cry, not knowing where he went wrong and she can see it on his face.
“I just don’t have what you have, and I’ve always been trying to copy you…”
“What?”
She sighs and wipes her tears, “I have had a big fat, fan-girly, crush on you since I was 18, I came here with my class to watch you do a talk on philias and phobias and then I knew I wanted to get into the academy and I wanted to beat your record and join the BAU, and I just thought; one day I’m going to be friends with this guy and catch bad guys with him and now I am and I’m so alone.”
“You have me?”
“I know,” she tries to smile, “but I only have you and I can tell you almost everything. Like my biggest stressor right now is that if just looking at fake crime scenes for 3 weeks has made me this anxious; what if I’m not cut out for this? What if I get to a real crime scene and I pass out or—“
“That’s only human,” he presses his lips together, awkwardly, and very Spencerly. “If you didn’t feel like this job makes you hate the world and untrusting of everyone around you; then I would think you’re crazy.”
“How do you do it?”
“I open up and let people in, but I typically wait till I’m at my lowest; crying in my friend's arms because I don’t know what to do anymore,” he smiles again, wider and toothy as she smiles back.
“Thank you,” she can’t help but tilt her head and smile as her heart settles and her brain calms down a bit, “I love you.”
“Can I kiss you or is that too much right now?”
She gets in closer to him, laying back down on the pillow and looking at him. They’re closer enough to kiss, and she just takes a moment to look at him, resting her hand on his cheek as he wraps around her waist and pulls her in closer.
“We’re okay?” He asks with his lips right against her, his breath is hot and he smells like toothpaste.
“We’re okay, but no more talking tonight, okay?” She whispers.
He nods, leaning in and kissing her finally. She knows she shouldn’t be kissing him, she knows that she should be mad at herself, but she also knew that even just pretending that he loved her back was good enough.
—
He gets called away to a case on Wednesday morning, he’s too busy to really call her and he doesn’t text back. He feels bad about it but he knows she wanted space to think anyway, what he didn’t expect was for her to reach out to Penelope.
She’s in the office with her on Friday, tired of Spencer ignoring her so she went to the one place he couldn’t avoid her; Penelope’s office.
“How can I help you today, my fine furry friends?” Y/N answers the phone with a smirk, copying Penelope’s line perfectly, they can hear them high five through the line.
“Y/N?” Spencer is the first to catch it, “what are you doing there?”
“I came to meet Anderson and see if I’d like to take his job or not,” she teases, pretending she wasn’t there just to bother him.
Hotch cuts in, asking the question he needed to ask before hanging up, “not sure what’s going on at home but we’re too close to cracking this case for schoolyard games.”
“Yes sir,” he nods and looks away, retreating to the other side of the room to stare at the map and pretend to find connections.
“Crack this and you can go home to her,” Derek whispers with a smile, thinking he’s helping the situation.
“That’s not where I want to be right now.”
“Woah,” Derek catches it, “what happened?”
“Nothing,” he’s quick to get him to stop it but he really wants advice, “she’s stressed out and she took it out on me and I wasn’t very nice back.”
“You said sorry and you pretended you were over it, didn’t you?”
He turns away from Derek with a nod, he wants to come out with it and get it over with and he’s so mad and embarrassed he just starts to cry a little, “I don’t want to lose her.”
“How could you?”
“You have no idea,” he rolls his eyes lightly and scoffs, confusing Derek.
“And I won't unless you want to talk to someone about what’s really bothering you, but you’ve been happier since you met her and I like seeing you happy, and Savannah likes double dates,” he scolds him with a smile, patting his shoulder lightly. “now let's crack this and maybe on the plane you will tell me what’s up?”
“Sure,” he says, but he doesn’t want to.
However, Derek Morgan is good at a lot of things, and one of those things is getting Spencer to calm down enough to tell him anything. Everyone is asleep on the plane, it’s just the two of them at the back together when Spencer finally feels confident enough to say it.
“I lied to you, a long time ago… and it’s just the first one.”
Derek doesn’t look angry, “okay, explain your thought process. I need to know how this pretty brain of yours works.”
He smiles a bit, “I slept with Elle the night before she shot that rapist in Ohio.”
“You did not?” Derek's voice gets a little too loud and they stop to make sure no one woke up.
“I did, but you still always made jokes about finally getting me some lovin’ and it bothered me for a while and I never told you, instead I offered to help my neighbour with her homework if she pretended to date me,” his voice lowers as the words continue and he only stares at the table between them.
“Spencer, I’m sorry,” Derek apologizes first. “I didn’t know I was upsetting you, is there anything else I do that upsets you?”
He shakes his head in a silent no, still not looking at him, he can't.
“What happened between you and Y/N?” He jumps to the main issue, fine with what happened because he feels bad for causing the issue in the first place.
“We started sleeping together.”
Derek sighs, “you have such a big brain, you can remember everything she’s ever said to you and yet you can’t see that she’s in love with you.”
“She’s good at pretending,” he pushes it away.
“No she’s not, because she’s pretending she doesn’t love you right now; the same way you are and you’re both fucking it up for each other,” Derek gives it to him straight. “You have always been loveable, but you have a very hard time accepting it, Spencer.”
“Yeah,” he starts to cry a little more.
“Go home and talk to her and tell her the truth,” it’s the best advice he can give and Spencer knows it. “What’s the worst that can go wrong?”
“She does love me back but in a few years, she realizes I’m too much and she leaves me,” his voice is the saddest Derek has ever heard it.
He gets up from his seat and hugs Spencer, sliding into the seat beside him and wrapping his arms around him, “you have never been too much. You just surround yourself with people who aren’t good enough to love you for who you are.”
“She’s better than me.”
“Which is exactly what I mean, she’s not going to leave you, believe me, once you love Spencer Reid for who he really is, it’s hard to stop,” he speaks from experience, thinking of what could have been between them if either of them had tried harder in the past.
“She’s the love of my life,” he confirms, “I’m never going to love anyone else the way I love her.”
They get the word that they’re going to be landing soon, Spencer wipes his tears and buckles in for the descent, avoiding everyone’s stares and questions on the ride back to headquarters. He’s nervous to see her, he knows his face is puffy and she’ll be there waiting for him with Penelope, but he has to do it.
“Would you wait here, I need to tell her now and she might not give me a ride home if it doesn’t go well,” he asks Derek before heading to Penelope, “she was already mad at me for telling Hotch the truth.”
“Okay, sure,” Derek smiles, reaching out a hand for Spencer, “come to me when you need me next time, okay?”
“Okay,” he agrees with a small smile, heading out to find his fake girlfriend.
She’s not with Penelope, no she’s in the filing room with Anderson and the other temps all talking and laughing, and it sounds far too interesting to interrupt. He waits outside the door and smiles at her laughter until he hears it.
“So be honest,” Agent Camden asks, “are you sleeping with Reid for this job?”
“If I was sleeping my way to the top, don’t you think I would have picked Morgan? Or Prentiss even?” She laughs and it’s like someone stabs a knife through his heart.
He turns around and heads back to Derek, “take me home.”
“Okay,” he doesn’t pry, he just grabs his coat and keys and follows Spencer to the garage.
—
He’s really ignoring her.
She finds out from Emily that Spencer left with Derek, and that he looked rather pissed off when he asked for a ride. It breaks her heart a little and she doesn’t know what to do next, she just drives home and finds herself knocking on his door.
“Let me in, please, Spencer!” She begs from behind his door.
He opens it and looks at her with a puffy red face, tear-stained cheeks and swollen lips, he’s been crying for a while. “What?”
“What did I do?”
“You slept with me,” he whispers, “and I told you I wouldn’t react well.”
“Is it my fault you’re crying?” She asks softly and he nods, “do you want to tell me?”
He closes his eyes and shakes his head, “are we still going to the banquet together tomorrow?”
“I really fucked up,” is all he can muster, crying again as he closes the door and goes to cry in his room.
She just opens the door again and follows him inside. Kicking off her shoes she crawls into bed beside him and wraps herself around him, “you don’t have to tell me but I am here for you, always.”
“I love you,” he says it like it’s the problem before he rests his head in the crook of her neck and holds her back for the first time in days.
“I love you, too, Spencer,” she cries along with him. They cry until he’s asleep and she’s just there holding him in her jeans and she’s really uncomfortable but she loves him too much to let go.
“More than you will ever know.”
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#spencer reid#spencer reid smut#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x you#spencer reid self insert#spencer reid request#criminal minds smut#criminal minds imagine#new romantics
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humph; han seojun (pt 5)
click here for humph masterlist!
story: frenemies to enemies to lovers, high school au
synopsis: seojun and you have known each other since kindergarten. you’re neighbors and even attended the same singing and piano classes. despite knowing each other for such a long time, you don’t enjoy spending time with seojun. even though you are aware of his unfairness, you keep spending time with him. when will you finally leave your childhood frenemy?
note: this is the last part of the series! i’m thankful for everyone who liked, commented and shared this fanfiction it really means a lot to me! through this series i gained many followers, i never imagined that this would get so many likes! again, hope you enjoy the last part and stay tuned for many other fictions hehe. humph! is a story inspired by pentagon’s “humph! / 접근금지”. originally, this is a seungyeon fanfiction, which i posted on my wattpad. words: ~4k
words cannot describe your current feelings. all you can say is that everything feels unreal and odd. indeed, you’re no longer able to focus on your work. all because of that night. all because of stupidly drunk han seojun.
why did you have to pick him up? why didn’t you just call someone else? thanks to his actions, you feel emotionally confused. not to mention, you are frightened to go to school.
can you imagine how awkward it’s going to be if seojun remembers the night? without doubt, your heart would get broken because you just know he’s going to apologize for kissing you. he’ll tell you it happened because he was drunk and definitely not because he feels anything for you.
memories from that night fill your head and it’s the only thing you can think of for the rest of the weekend.
not until your mother forces you to visit the han’s with her. no wonder you refuse to go, han seojun kissed you! of course, neither your mother nor your brother understand your panicked actions when you drop on your knees, hiding your face in your palms dramatically. both of them end up dragging you to the han’s, ignoring your annoying whines.
seojun’s mum greets you with excitement when you eventually arrive at their front door. stepping in with your trembling body, you look around in paranoia, checking if seojun’s home. while doing so, you fail to notice juyeong giving you a side glance with narrowed eyes.
you: chorong please pick me up from seojun’s house
quickly you type your friend a text message before entering the living room, where gowoon waves at you happily.
kim chorong: you’re at seojun’s?!
kim chorong: can i guess what you’re doing ;)
your phone rings two times in a row, making all eyes land on you. laughing it off, you put your phone on mute before typing chorong a reply.
you: ew no please just save me from here okay?
the conversation between the mums continue and suddenly your brother asks if seojun is home. gowoon replies that he probably got out of the shower just now, which puts you in a panicked situation.
i need to get outta here
but like always, the universes loves playing with you right on time because the next thing you see is seojun walking out of his room, dressed in jeans and a hoodie, hand ruffling his wet hair. trying your best not to make eye contact, your gaze darts around the whole room.
after greeting your mother and juyeong, seojun’s eyes land on your awkward figure. no longer able to avoid his gaze, you look right back at seojun, cheeks turning into a red color. you can’t do anything but blink since you’re extremely nervous. if he does remember everything from that night, you want to get swallowed by the floor beneath you. if he doesn’t, you certainly will try your best to remain calm and unsuspicious.
“do you have a moment?”, without waiting for too long seojun grabs your wrist after putting the towel away.
“f-for what?” you manage to speak as your panicked posture suddenly stiffens.
“science project.”, the boy comes up with an average excuse while trying to ignore the surprised looks everyone is giving him as he practically drags you to his own room.
what if he knows?!
from all the heart racing, you’re sure that you’ll end up in the hospital one day. it technically pounds heavily in your chest when you’re head is going through every possible answer you could give seojun when he asks you about the kiss.
after pulling you into his room, seojun closes the door behind you before pushing your body against it. in only seconds, his palm presses against it, right next to your face. it reminds you of the time when he questioned you about his motorcycle keys in the hallways. thankfully, his face isn’t as close as back then. you’re pretty sure, you would’ve fainted by now.
“so what about the science project, haha?” words finally leave your mouth when you realize seojun isn’t going to say anything but stare at your flustered face.
“about that...”, seojun mutters in a quiet tone as he leans in slowly. the only thing you can do is avoid his gaze while gulping, thinking that he probably remembers the kiss. yet, when he doesn’t stop getting closer, lips almost touching yours, you push him away in a swift move, eyes wide in shock,
“what the hell!”
han seojun doesn’t seem surprised. he only scratches his neck, eyes darting around his room before finally landing on your panicked figure,
“i had to do an experiment.”
“w-what experiment? are you kidding me?”
more confused than ever, you question with a flushed face. however, seojun sighs to reveal his exhaustiveness, hands hiding his face before rubbing his brow to ward off his headache,
“i- something happened friday night and i can’t stop thinking about it.”
acting like you don’t know what happened, you continue to look at him with confusion.
“i drank a little bit too much and can’t really remember anything except for one detail- but apparently someone came to pick me up and brought me home. i asked the worker who it was and he told me it was my neighbor.”
when seojun trails off and shakes his head with furrowed eyebrows you hold yourself back from letting out a relieved sigh.
he doesn’t know it was you. it’s like all the worries leave your body before the boy starts talking again,
“isn’t that weird? i mean why would my neighbor come to get me, it’s not like i’m close to any of them. also, which neighor? he said it was a girl around your height with y/h/c hair. the only neighbor that comes to my mind is lee minji but there’s no chance i could have kissed her.”
“you did what?”, although knowing exactly what he did, your eyes widden in horror when you notice that he remembers the kiss but not the person. seojun realizes what he just said and tries to explain everything in a rushed tone,
“look, i don’t know why i did it. i was drunk! besides that, i’m not even sure if it was her, or anyone! what if it’s just a false memory? or a dream?”
the young boy feels like he needs to justify himself to you when he catches glimpse of the worry hiding in your eyes. han seojun doesn’t want you to think that he would kiss anyone just like that. in fact, he wouldn’t want to kiss anyone but you.
but that’s not what you’re thinking at the moment. the only thing you can focus on is seojun’s statement leaving his mouth a few seconds ago: “i was drunk!”
of course, he was. how could you even have the smallest hope that he kissed you because he wanted to? ashamed of your expectations, you clear your throat and look away, playing with the rings on your fingers.
“oh man, that sucks!”, you chuckle falsely, “don’t worry about it too much. it could happen to anyone, you know?”
“i think about it day and night, thought.”, seojun rubs his neck, eyes fixed on the carpet on the floor.
“why? was it that special for you?”, laughing you push his shoulder playfully.
unexpectedly, seojun looks up to meet your eyes and blinks,
“it was.”
your heart drops. your body freezes on spot. your eyes stare into his.
hearing this shocked you, why was it special to him? without doubt, it was special to you too. precisely, you remember his soft lips on yours, warm touch on your face.
breaking the stare, you shake your head and look around, “just forget about it.”
after a short silence, your eyes finally land on something certain on seojun’s desk. taking a few steps closer, you are able to take a closer look at the item. picking up the polaroid picture, you smile at the photo of you sleeping on seojun’s shoulder in the bus. your arm was wrapped around his torso, his look fixed on you.
“where did you get this?”, turning around with the picture still in your hands, you show it to seojun with a happy face.
“o-oh that? the others took it while you were sleeping.”
“i didn’t know you had this.”
“yeah, i kinda just forgot hahahaha.”
“sure you did!”, suddenly kim chorong bursts into the room with a teasing smile,
“i’m here, y/n. but it seems like you don’t need me anymore.”
“why are you here?”, seojun frowns.
“she told me to come! it’s not always about you.”, sticking out this tongue, your friend shrugs and lets himself fall on seojun’s bed,
“what are we doing today? how about noraebang?”
_
brushing his fingers over the multiple lipsticks, seojun’s eyes focus on a certain pink one. hesitantly, he picks it up to take a closer look before putting it back to its place.
“do they have strawberry ones?”, he asks his sister who looks for something specific. gowoon asked his brother if they could go to the mall together, since she’s been getting into make up these days and therefore needs more products.
“what?”
“like strawberry lip balms.”
“why do you need one?” she laughs at her brother who seems a little unsure.
“just because!” seojun tries to hide everything when he notices his sister making fun of him.
when she eventually shows him the lip balms and he’s able to smell all of them, seojun gives up. the boy went through several lip balms but couldn’t find the right one. maybe he should just give up looking for signs.
“why is everyone so obsessed with them? y/n owns plenty of them, it‘s insane.“
juyeong, who happened to tag along with gowoon and seojun, lets out a sigh as he watches the older boy.
“she does?“, suddenly seojun is interested in something that juyeong says.
“absolutely. you can ask her, you know?“
“i should ask her as well! she seems to like make up!“, gowoon smiles excitedly.
although juyeong is aware of his sister‘s lack of skills in make up, he still nods almost to quickly,
“definitely, you should! you can come to our house since she‘s always home anyway.“
seojun no longer listens to the younger‘s conversation, but instead thinks about what juyeong said earlier.
_
running to get in class on time has become a regular thing for you. once again, your legs move in super speed in the empty hallways as you hold tight on your heavy books. not even realizing your open backpack hanging on your right shoulder, you struggle to breathe normally.
you become interested in your untied shoes while running and suddenly bump into someone else, because you didn’t look ahead.
in a swift move the person steadies you to keep you from falling. still, your backpack drops from your shoulder and causes all of your belongings to drop on the floor.
too distracted from the mess that got created, you quickly kneel down to collect your books and folders,
“shoot!” you mutter, extremely stressed from the fact that you’re losing more time.
“running late again, zombie?”
you realize it’s han seojun when he bends down to help you pick up your stuff. after collecting some of your folders and books, his eyes focus on a certain lip balm placed next to your foot. instantly he reaches for it with a frown, your books still in his other hand.
completely stressed out, you rapidly stuff all of your supplies into your backpack and fail to notice seojun observing every small detail of your lip balm. as you finally look up, you take your books away from seojun’s grip and hold them in your hands instead of putting them back in, so that you can save some time,
“thank you.”, before you can leave seojun stands in front of you, holding your strawberry lip balm. after smelling it, he raises his eyebrows at you,
“is this yours?”
“oh, yes! thanks.” unaware of his thoughts, you take the item from his hand with a smile and put it into the pocket of your blazer.
and then seojun just stands there, watching you sprint to your next class.
he’s about to lose his mind.
_
patting his skin dry with a towel after washing it with cold water, seojun’s gaze darts around the school’s gym. his eyes look for you in the big hall filled with students, who came to watch the basketball game. the young boy is sure to have seen you sitting in the first row with lee suho during the game. however, it seems like you are nowhere to be seen. did you maybe leave with lee suho?
frustrated and tired at the same time, seojun approaches his friend kim chorong only seconds after the game,
“do you know where y/n is?”
“y/n? i’m not quite sure. she was here during the whole game, thought.”, chorong shrugs with a small pout forming on his lips.
“how did she leave so fast?”, seojun sighs annoyed before someone suddenly hits his back forcefully,
“if you’re looking for y/n, she just left with lee suho.”, sua tries to hide her teasing smile.
“with lee suho? why? where did they go?”
“she told me she lost her bracelet and wanted to find it.”, sua crosses her arms,
“they’re probably looking in the hallways or something.”
hearing that, seojun instantly drops his bag and runs out of the gym hall, ignoring his friend’s calls.
“yah, where are you going? we’re gonna celebrate your win!”, kim chorong yells only to turn to sua after seojun is out of his sight. they both share a smile before high fiving,
“good job.”
“taehoon just called me. suho left y/n. she’s alone in the hallways, looking for that bracelet.”
“as expected, cupid team never fails.”
_
seojun slows down when he turns the next corner. finally reaching the hallway of the third floor, his steps echo in the empty area. it’s dark outside and many students already left the building right after the end of the basketball game, leaving only seojun and you in the dark hallway of the third floor.
eventually the young boy spots you near your classroom, searching for your bracelet with worried eyes. he notices how you run your hand through your hair, upset that you lost something so important. seojun hides behind the wall, still questioning if he should approach you. strangely, suho is not around which makes him question everything.
while thinking about leaving, seojun’s eyes land on a specific item placed right next to the plant on his right side. surprised, he picks up the flower bracelet, which he gifted you after he apologized on the last day of the school trip, and stares at it for a short while.
hesitantly, seojun finally steps out and approaches you with a more relaxed figure.
letting out a yelp, you turn around in a swift move when you feel two hands placing on your shoulders. with widen eyes you face han seojun standing only a few inches away from you. pressing a palm on your chest, you sigh in relief,
“you scared me. again.”
“looking for this?”, ignoring your annoyed eyes, he swings your bracelet in his right hand.
“how- where did you find it? i was looking everywhere!”, quickly you snatch it away from him to place it around your wrist tightly, making sure it won’t slip out this time.
“is it so important that you spend hours searching in this building?” seojun rolls his eyes and crosses his arms over his chest, “you should go home now. it’s really late.”
“yes. it is important to me.” you mutter and glare at the boy in front of you before thanking him.
after that, suddenly silence takes over the room. you are too busy adjusting the bracelet on your wrist, while seojun only watches you with a curious gaze. he seems to be lost in his own thoughts.
it’s true that he’s seen you wear it every single day.
he’s also certain about the smell of your strawberry lip balm. seojun is a little bit angry at himself, for remembering every small detail of the kiss, but not the face of the person he shared it with. maybe he’s just tricking himself about it. maybe it is actually you, who he kissed that night.
thinking of the only way to find out, the boy interrupts the long silence as he puts his hand into the pocket of your blazer, taking out the specific strawberry lip balm. you’re more than surprised and freeze on spot when he places the tip of the container on your bottom lip and applies it on your lips.
absolutely taken aback, you fail to notice seojun taking a few steps closer to you, his body almost attached to yours now. it doesn’t take him long to lift up your chin, enabling your eyes to meet his. they look into yours with so much intensity that your cheeks start glowing from the heat. once again, your heart pounds aggressively in your chest as the young boy nears his face to yours. from all your experiences till now, you feel the most nervous now. not to mention, confused from his sudden actions. (*insert “i’m the mood for dancing” by yuju*)
last time he was drunk and didn’t know what he was doing.
now he’s completely aware of his actions.
instantly you close your eyes shut, waiting impatiently for his lips to touch yours. both of you have been longing feel this feeling again, never able to get rid of the memory from friday night. seojun tilts his head slightly before finally placing his lips on your soft ones.
and in the exact moment, when he tastes the strawberry flavor on your lips, his heart speeds up, his hands hold your warm face, he knows it’s you. he realizes that it was you, who picked him up and you, who he kissed with so much emotion.
firmly you grip onto seojun’s t-shirt when your knees feel weak. as a result the boy only smiles against your lips before his hands move from your face to your waist, pulling you to his body. running one hand up and down your waist, he continues moving his lips against yours.
before you have the chance to move yours arms to wrap them around his neck, seojun slowly pulls away. you open your eyes to see him licking his bottom lip with a small smile. somehow you’re unable to meet his eyes when he lets out a chuckle,
“thought i wouldn’t find out sooner or later?”
“h-how did you know it was me?”, you whisper, grip still tight on his shirt.
“strawberry taste.”
his simple answer surprises you, “oh, right...”
seojun caresses your face in his hands as he notices your shy tone to make you look at him,
“why didn’t you just tell me?”
“i thought you didn’t mean it since you were extremely drunk.”
“ah, y/n. you haven’t changed at all, have you?”
hearing seojun suddenly laugh makes you even more confused,
“what do you mean?”
“you’re always so oblivious about everything like my feelings towards you.” seojun smiles at you adoringly and pushes a few strands of hair behind your ear.
“you-”
“i like you, y/n. have been the whole time.”
“you were always mean to me, how was i supposed to know?”, slighlty pouting, you push his shoulder playfully.
“you’re right and i’m sorry about that. i was so focused on hiding my feelings that i didn’t realize i was hurting you. i didn’t want you to think that i liked you.”
“you succeeded.”
“yeah,” seojun scratches his neck while looking into your eyes, “still haven’t gotten an answer from you, y/n.”
taking his hand, you rub the back of it before kissing his right cheek,
“i like you too, seojun.”
seojun melts. he feels his happiest and his cheeks turn into the shade of a tomato.
“look at us. who would’ve thought?”, you laugh at his shyness.
“not me.”, seojun smiles before pulling you in for another kiss.
_
the cold hair hits your face as you sit on a swing while seojun pushes you. swinging your feet with a big smile on your face, you glance behind your shoulder quickly to see seojun looking at you with adoring eyes.
“higher!”, you scream, catching the kids’ attention on the playground for a short second.
therefore, your boyfriend pushes you with more force as he tries to hide his amused grin, “as you wish, my highness. but you’re scaring the kids away, don’t you think?”
“feels like we’re kids again.”, you remember your childhood moments with seojun.
“enough for now. when is it my turn?”, seojun pouts playfully, still pushing you on the swings.
“i said ten minutes not five, seojun.”
both of you laugh hysterically at your remark before he firmly grips on the chain of the swing, making it stop abruptly. before you can turn around to look at him with a frown, your boyfriend places a kiss on your left cheek, causing them to turn into a shade of bright pink.
“i love you.”
“i love you too, seojunnie.”
that’s all seojun needs to hear before pushing you on the swing again, heart melting in his chest.
and in the end of the day he knows that you’ll always be there for him. and you know that he’ll be right there too.
_
the end!
this is the last part of the series “humph; han seojun”. firstly, i hope you liked the ending and the story in total. secondly, i wrote this story because i noticed that there aren’t many han seojun fics! i thank everyone for giving me all the love that i don’t deserve. thirdly, please stay tuned for more fanfictions! be aware that i’m open for requests, feedback and everything nice. love you and stay safe,
your writer renjunes
#the end#humph#frenemies to lovers#han seojun#seojun#han seojun fluff#seojun fluff#han seojun x reader#han seojun imagine#han seojun imagines#seojun imagines#seojun imagine#seojun x reader#true beauty#kdrama#kpop#hwang in yeop#hwang inyeop#fanfiction
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