#I hope she can eventually finally free herself... I know she's basically come out a million times but y'all know what I mean

[gaylornation]

what's actually bonkers to me is that I found out they had broken up for the final time literally the day before Lover dropped and I couldn't say shit... now here we are almost 4 years later and Karlie showed up to her show. like my mind has not fully comprehended it yet lol

[robinsegghead]

Danny's Daycare Part 7

[Master List]

   “This ain’t some weird trick, right?” Miguel asked for the fifth time since Danny had showed them their new place. Both boys had been shocked into silence upon entering the space, eventually following Danny around to see their rooms and bathroom.

            Shaking his head, Danny swallowed his bite of pizza. “I bought the building with the intention of giving the apartments to people who needed them. You guys need a safe place to stay.”

            Miguel eyed him warily, glancing at Jazz who’d been mostly quiet since they’d arrived, knowing they were overwhelmed. “We can’t stay here without pullin’ our weight. Wha’s rent like?”

            Danny hummed, considering. Jazz looked at him in shock, thinking he was actually planning on charging the boys rent. Finally, Danny wiped his hands of the pizza grease, folded them on the table, and looked at both boys seriously. “Here’s the deal I’m proposing. You two live here until you’re at least eighteen AND,” He emphasized the word, so they knew he was serious. “have graduated from high school. That’s it. That’s the rent. You’ll be paying me back by getting an education.”

            “But tha’s ridiculous!” Santiago shouted, clearly torn between confusion and hope. “Nobody gives nothin’ out for free! It just ain’t done!”

            Sitting back, Danny contemplated what he’d need to say to help them understand his intentions. Jazz met his gaze and gave him a subtle nod, knowing what he was thinking about doing. “My parents,” Danny started. Jazz stood up, clearing away trash and dishes as he told a story neither wanted to relive. “didn’t pay me or my sister much attention.”

            That was a safe start right? He didn’t need to explain the whole ghost thing or that they tortured him, just a bit of background. “They forgot my seventh birthday, too caught up in work to be bothered and after that it wasn’t occasional forgetfulness. Most days they didn’t know where I was, what I was up to, how I was doing in school, who my friends were, because they were too busy to care.

            “That put a lot of responsibility on my shoulders and even more on my sister’s. She basically raised me.” He dipped his head in her direction as she put away the leftovers. “In my freshman year my grades began to suffer, and I struggled with really bad anxiety, but I didn’t have parents to help me with that, because they didn’t really know me as a person.”

            Taking in a deep breath, Miguel looked between the Nightingales. “What’s that gotta do with us, though?”

            “My sister, who spent her entire childhood taking care of everyone but herself,” He added with a smirk. “likes to remind me that I can’t help everyone, as much as I might try. But,” the two boys were watching him closely, absorbing his every word. “I can help some people. And I can help you. Don’t tell Jazz but I’m always trying to be more like her. And I think, if she had the resources I do, that she’d help you guys out.

            “Let me help a couple of siblings who don’t have parents looking out for them.” Danny pleaded. “Please.”

            Miguel and Santiago had a silent conversation, the air hung heavy in the room as they seemed to come to a decision. “A’ight man, you seem chill.” Miguel shrugged, the rest of the tension leaving his body. 

            It didn’t take long after that for the boys to start showing how tired they were. Jazz grabbed her stuff and headed out with a ‘I’ll call you tomorrow, brother’ thrown over her shoulder. Danny reminded the boys that he was across the hall and one door down and that if there was an emergency they could use their emergency key to get into his place. They’d seemed surprised by that, but Danny reminded them that he was, essentially, their guardian now, and he was there if they needed him.

            “Tomorrow I’ll come by around ten and we can go get you guys some school supplies and anything else you want or need, yeah?” Danny asked, moving towards the door.

            Miguel was pushing Santiago towards his room like a good older brother. “Sure, sounds good.”

            For the first time in a while, Danny got a full night of sleep. This was the shocking realization he came to when he awoke to his alarm and felt rested. The first thing he did was search his fridge for food- he was starving- and remembered Red Hood’s little gifts. The chicken parm had been pretty good, and he couldn’t remember the last time he’d had a home cooked meal, even if he did have to reheat it.

            Sticking the stew in a pot, Danny began the process of reheating another Red Hood MealTM and planned out the day mentally. They’d need to get some basic school supplies to start working on tutoring, they’d get more specific items when school actually started, but for now, calculators, notebooks, pens, pencils, and some workbooks would be fine.

            After that they’d need to get the boys each a phone and at least one computer for them to share. It would be necessary for school anyways, hopefully he could convince them to just let him buy them each a laptop but that might be difficult.

            Although it was Saturday, and he planned on Saturdays being tutoring days, Danny didn’t plan on working on any school stuff once they got home. They would certainly be overwhelmed by everything else going on and didn’t need one more thing to add to it. Plus, Danny needed to figure out exactly how to teach these kids everything they needed to know. 

            Had they ever gone to school? If so, what level had they gotten to? What were their learning styles? Who would he bring in to teach the subjects he sucked at? Like English- Danny was bad at the arts. English, Social sciences, even history, he wasn’t very good at. 

            Shaking his head, he dished out the stew and tried not to get caught up on the details. He was winging it, and maybe that was a bad thing when it came to kids, but it was better than what they’d had going on before, so he wouldn’t be too hard on himself.

            (Who was he kidding? Danny was only ever hard on himself, and he only ever piled the work on until he was buried under an avalanche of paperwork and drama.)

            The boy seemed almost surprised when he knocked on their door at ten AM sharp.

            “You have a key, y’know.” Santiago muttered, closing the door behind Danny.

            Danny frowned. “This is your home, Santiago. I’m not using my key unless there’s an emergency.” He offered a smile to Santiago’s contemplative face, before clapping his hands together. “All right, where’s that brother of yours?”

            The younger boy frowned. “He wasn’t feeling too good.” Right. Because stab wounds don’t heal quickly, not for normal people- Danny you can’t just forget things like that! “Said we should go without ‘im.” 

            “Well that won’t do.” Danny sighed. “We need to get those supplies, but I don’t want to go without Miguel, do you?” Santiago shook his head hesitantly. “Then it’s settled. We will simply order everything we need and when Miguel’s feeling better we can go out. Have you eaten yet?”

            Santiago shrugs, not meeting Danny’s eyes. So that’s a no. Without another word, Danny begins searching the fridge and cupboards for what he needed. He wasn’t much of a cook, there was a reason he hadn’t had a homemade meal in a long time, but he could do pancakes, and he knew he’d bought the ingredients for it too.

            The younger boy just watched, silently, as Danny began measuring out flour. 

            “So,” Danny started, immediately regretting it and feeling just as awkward as he was in high school. “I did my best to get you guys the necessities. I don’t want to overwhelm you, but when I say that you can ask for anything, I mean anything.” He emphasized his words by looking Santiago directly in the eye until the boy looked away. “If you want a TV, tools for a hobby, books, literally anything, you just have to ask.”

            The boy licked his lips, still not making eye contact but at least he nodded. They’d work on it. Rome wasn’t built in a day, right?

            Danny tried again. “What do you do for fun, Santiago?”

            The boy shrugged again, leaning against the counter and watching Danny closely.

            “So you… want to help me?” He asked, hesitantly, maybe he was reading the boy wrong. But before he could rescind the offer or change the subject, the boy nodded slowly, moving closer to Danny. “Okay, first things first, you gotta wash your hands.”

            The morning was filled with the smell of fresh pancakes and the quiet conversation between Danny and Santiago. At one point Miguel ventured out of his room and Danny gave him a stack of pancakes, drawing him into the conversation. Early afternoon Miguel moved from the living room back to his room to take a nap but not before Danny could change his bandages. There was something incredibly domestic about it. Danny didn’t think too hard about it.

            He let Santiago help him pick out some school supplies online as well as a phone case and anything else that caught his eye- including a TV which Santiago assured him he ‘didn’t need especially because it had been three years since he’d seen a movie so what was even the point?’ which Danny thought was code for ‘a television is an absolute necessity’. 

He bought the TV. 

~~~

            The rest of the weekend was spent making sure the boys felt comfortable and Miguel was healing well. He made an appointment with Dr. Thompkins for the following Saturday to check up on the boy and maybe get his stitches out depending on how everything was looking- Danny wasn’t a great judge of such things on humans anymore. 

            He’d pushed his own organs back inside himself, held his chest closed, snapped bones back into place-

            Humans were fragile.

            He was somewhat grateful he wasn’t that fragile anymore- though he was sporting a rather purple bruise under his left eye from yet another power nap. (He’d thought those were gone after his restful Friday night but apparently not.) It was fine, the bruise would be gone within a day or so and he’d be more careful to take his power naps on sleeping surfaces instead of while standing.

            Miguel had insisted they’d be fine; that Danny didn’t need to take another day off of work to watch over them, and Danny (who’d promised not to act like their parent) had agreed. Still, he left a clone in his apartment to be there in case of an emergency. 

Anxiety was a feeling Danny was familiar with, after much introspection in his adult life he’d come to the conclusion that he’d had anxiety since he was seven, but anxiety relating to children he was responsible for on this level was new, and terrifying. Of course he’d felt responsible for all of the people in Amity Park, and all of the ghosts he came across, but never had he been so completely responsible for the safety of two children who had no one else to depend on. 

 How he got into this situation escaped him. He’d never cared much for kids- Jazz said him not wanting kids was because he’d never been allowed to be a kid in the first place- and yet, here he was, with a daycare, four cats, and now two teenagers dependent on him. 

Ancients help him…

When he got to the daycare there were already two families waiting outside to drop their kids off- should he open earlier? Quickly, he unlocked the doors, turned the power on, and signed the kids in for the day. He had a couple of hours before Mia showed up (and Ember had already told him she wouldn’t be coming in for a few days) so he cloned himself to entertain Clara, Maru, and Benji while he looked over paperwork.

It never ended.

There was a steady increase in kids, Danny had to get rid of his clone every time someone new showed up and then reclone himself after they left, and by the time Mia arrived he was managing fourteen kids by himself. Sort of. Obviously, with clones, he was fine albeit a little tired, but once Mia showed up it was just the two of them.

Nap time couldn’t come soon enough.

“They’re all out cold.” Mia whispered, closing the door to the nap room. “You look like you also need a nap.”

He dropped an armful of toys into the toy bin and sighed. “A nap sounds good but I can’t. I need to finally finish setting up the website for this place so we can hopefully start getting applications online.” He paused, feeling Mia’s concerned gaze on his back. “I want to extend the hours of this place.”

“You’re kidding.”

“I wish I was. Two families were waiting at the door this morning because we didn't open early enough for their needs.” He rubbed a tired hand across his brow and leaned against the nearest desk. “So… I need to hire some more people to maintain not only the hours we already have that are abysmally understaffed, but to open earlier. I haven’t been able to accept any new families recently either, we just can’t safely take care of anymore kids without more staff.”

Mia pursed her lips. “School’s just about out. I’ll be graduating and looking to work a bit more. I was going to bring it up anyways, but I’d like to work full time.”

He nodded, pulling out his phone to order food. “I can do that. You want to work earlier or later? And what do you want for lunch?”

“Earlier is better, Mama and I switch off cooking dinner so I don’t want to be home too late. What are you thinking? Thai kind of sounds good.” Mia took her usual spot in a bean bag towards the entrance of the room and pulled out the monitor set up to watch the kids.

Before Danny could respond, the bell rang. He and Mia shared looks, no one ever showed up in the middle of the day- not unless it was a last minute emergency. Mia made to move but Danny shook his head, and set his phone down. Someone needed to watch the kids while he saw who had shown up so late.

What he’d expected was a frazzled parent with a child, hoping to leave them here for a few hours because their babysitter had fallen through or they got called into work or some other reason most parents had.

What he did not expect to see was the very tall, very well built, Red Hood, holding a tupperware container. Before he could get a word out- which he wasn’t sure wouldn’t have simply been some kind of ‘wha?’ Red Hood tilted his head.

“Do you not eat or something?”

“Huh?”

Hood offered the food container. “Cause I’ve left you food a few times now and every time the old stuff is still there. If you think it’s poisoned I can take a bite first to prove it’s not.”

Danny’s jaw hung open, face screwed up in confusion, not really knowing what he was supposed to say. “Uh… I’ve been busy…” He took the container trying to ignore the stupid flutter in his stomach when their fingers brushed and noted how warm it was. “I had the chicken parmesan the other day and… uh the stew as well. They were really good- why are you leaving me food?”

The vigilante shrugged, hands on hips (which Danny tried very hard not to look at). “Think of it as a thank you for-” He glanced at the closed door. “What you did when we met. If you told people it was you I wouldn’t be the only person thanking you.”

Shaking his head, Danny set the container down. “You- YOU are thanking me for kill-” He looked at the door again. “For what happened?”

“Why’d you say it like that?”

Why’d he say it like that? Why’d he say it like that? “You- I-” Danny shut his mouth before he could accidentally reveal he’s the King of the Infinite Realms and that he had always wanted to meet the Red Hood to thank HIM. “No reason. Uh… well, you don’t have to do that, you know, if you don’t want to. I mean- it’s really good though! I appreciate it!”

A thought occurred to him. “How did you know I worked here?”

It was difficult to tell exactly what expression Hood was making sometimes, but he was pretty sure the bastard was smirking as he turned away and pushed the door open, pausing in the entrance. “It’s my job to find people of interest- and you are certainly a person of interest.”

Danny might have died again just a little bit.

~~~

  Miguel POV

It had been a week since he and Santi had moved into the apartment Danny had provided for them. A week since he’d been stabbed. Doc Thompkins had said he was healing well at the check up he’d had the night prior and he felt like he was. The first few days had been… frustrating. He’d moved into an entirely new place and instead of being able to assess the situation, search for threats, create escape plans, he’d been stuck in bed, eating homemade pancakes and taking washcloth baths.

Danny was… strange. He came over at least once a day, usually after work because he left so early in the mornings, and cooked a meal. Again, usually dinner because he came over in the evenings, but twice he’d come over, cooked dinner, cleaned the kitchen, and then cooked a meal for breakfast the following day before cleaning the kitchen again.

He asked about their days, what they needed, what they wanted, and didn’t act like their dad. It was refreshing and surprising but not once did Danny scold them, lay down ground rules, or try to tell them what to do. He acted like a friend.

Miguel hadn’t had a friend in a long time.

So on Friday night when Danny came over to make dinner and asked if Miguel felt well enough to go shopping the following day, he’d agreed. Well, he’d argued a bit- they didn’t need anything else Danny had given them more than he’d ever be able to repay! But the man was insistent that they needed more clothes and he wanted them to pick them out so he knew they actually liked them.

That’s how he found himself in a clothing store in the diamond district feeling wildly out of place trying on dozens of items of clothing. 

“How about this one?” Danny held a shirt up to Santiago who examined it closely, felt it between his fingers, grimaced, and shook his head cautiously. “Got it, no polyester.” Danny put it back and moved on. 

Miguel caught the incredulous look Santi sent his way and gave what he hoped was a reassuring smile. Their father had been an angry man, one who didn’t take no for an answer and thought Santiago was trying to be difficult when he ‘acted special’. To say Miguel and Santiago were surprised that Danny accepted the no and moved on without any hint of anger was an understatement.

Danny held up a different shirt. “This one’s one hundred percent cotton.” Santi reached out carefully, felt the fabric, and nodded, a shy smile forcing its way onto his face. His brother pretended to be tough because that’s what the streets demanded from all who lived on them, but he’d always been a softy with a big brain and a bigger heart. If Miguel had been hesitant to accept Danny’s offer about school it had dissipated the second he thought of what it would mean for his brother’s future.

“I hope you’re finding some things for yourself, Miguel.” Danny teased.

Scoffing, Miguel held up the three shirts and two sweaters he’d picked out. “I know how to shop for clothes, Danny.”

Danny looked Miguel’s way with a retort clearly on the tip of his tongue, but his eyes were pulled away from Miguel and locked on someone else. “Damian?” He called, waving to someone a few aisles away.

Following the direction of Danny’s eyes, Miguel saw a boy about his age standing across the store. He wore a serious expression, not quite a scowl but close, and said something to the man next to him who was much older than the person Miguel thought was Damian. The pair made their way closer much to the boy’s disapproval.

Danny set down the clothes he’d been showing Santiago, and moved out of the aisles to greet Damian. “I thought that was you! Nice to see you again. I was actually going to let you know that Curiosity’s finished his meds and has made a full recovery!”

Ah. Danny had shown Miguel and Santiago his cats earlier in the week and mentioned that someone had been giving him advice on how to take care of them, especially the sick one. So this kid had been the one helping Danny?

“I’m glad I was able to be of assistance. The cats seem to be in good hands.” The boy dipped his head.

The older man gasped. “Why Dami- that was almost a compliment!” By the sound of his teasing, they were brothers. “I don’t know how you did it, but I think Damian might actually like you. My name’s Dick, by the way, pleasure to meet you.”

“On purpose?!” 

The group turned to Santiago who was still watching the entire encounter from where he’d been looking at shirts. His brother’s eyes widened as he realized what he’d said and that he’d practically insulted a complete stranger based on their name. Luckily, Dick offered a smile and Danny laughed.

“Yes, on purpose.”

Danny held out his hand which Dick shook. “Danny Nightingale, Damian’s told me about you, it’s nice to finally meet you.”

Dick’s eyes widened. “You told your friend about me?” 

“Tt. Relax Grayson, I simply mentioned you in passing. I didn’t think Nightingale would latch onto such information.”

Miguel exhaled quickly, suppressing a chuckle, but it was too late, he’d been noticed.

“Oh right! This is Miguel and Santiago.” Danny pointed at each of them and smiled. Miguel wished this encounter would be over. He didn’t enjoy meeting new people, it made his skin itch and his mouth dry out. As much as he disliked shopping for clothes and Danny spending way too much money on him, he disliked meeting new people even more. Danny seemed to sense this and did his best to finish things up. “We were just finishing up some clothes shopping before working on some stuff at home.”

Damian, sensing the dismissal, nodded once. “It was nice to see you again, Nightingale, do message me if you have any more animal related questions.” He grabbed Dick’s arm and began pulling him away, Dick grumbling about wanting to get to know Danny more as they left and Miguel released a sigh.

“Sorry guys.” Danny apologized. “Let’s finish up and get food on the way home, yeah?”

~~~

When they got home Miguel and Santiago put their bags in their rooms and joined Danny in the kitchen. He looked… exhausted. To be fair, they all did, but Danny hadn’t been homeless or recently stabbed (as far as Miguel was aware) so he didn’t really have a great excuse. Before he could say anything, Danny clapped his hands together.

“So I’m thinking while we eat lunch we can touch on some school stuff just for a bit, and then we can all relax.” Santiago straightened up a bit, some of the exhaustion disappearing from his face and Miguel couldn’t help but smile. As the boys grabbed their boxes of takeout Danny grabbed them drinks. He’d already learned that Miguel liked coke and Santiago liked grape juice and had continued to supply them both with it.

“I don’ know how you’re gonna catch us up on three years of schoolin’.” Miguel said honestly, Santiago’s shoulders drooped slightly.

Danny took a bite of his food and considered what Miguel said. That was something about him Miguel liked a lot. He always seemed to think before speaking- at least, when it was something important.

“Well I’m really good at math and science so I should be able to figure out a good way to catch you guys up, it’s the arts we have to worry about. English, history, that kind of thing. Now, tests suck, I know.” He took a sip of his coffee- he drank way too much of that stuff. “But I want you each to take a few placement tests so I can understand where you’re going to be starting. Then I’ll put together a plan to get you back to the levels you would be at before the entrance exams at Gotham Academy.”

Miguel groaned. “Man tests suck.”

“I know.” Danny assured. “But these aren’t graded. I don’t care how well you do, I want to know what you don’t know so I can help you learn it. This is a judgment free zone- always.” He looked at the two seriously, Miguel’s skin itched. “I’ll just have you take two today, how's that? And you can do the other two tomorrow while I plan around the ones you take today?”

That seemed fair. He thought it seemed fair. While taking the placement tests he wasn’t so sure anymore. His brain hurt almost immediately and he wondered why he was really doing this. He wasn’t going to pass high school, he’d never been very smart and when Danny realized he wasn’t smart enough to get a good job he’d just be back on the streets again. 

His brother let out a happy sound as he solved one of the science problems and moved onto the next one. 

Taking a deep breath, Miguel remembered why he was doing this. Just because he’d fail out and end up back on the streets didn’t mean his brother had to. His brother was smart, smarter than him, and he’d be damned if he held Santi back from getting into Gotham University someday.

He could do this. For Santi, he thought he could do anything.

Prev. Next

[secretlytherealsonicthehedgehog]

so this is me basically yapping about my queen’s complexity😊 regina mills they could never make me hate you

ANYWAYS. one thing i absolutely ADORE about her complexity is her voice. lana parrilla’s voice consistently changes depending on her scenes and i think it is done absolutely BEAUTIFULLY.

when she’s with cora, her voice is sensitive and quiet, as if she’s afraid to get yelled at but still looking for approval and validation.

with henry, her voice is firm but still caring. it’s her SON, after all.

with daniel, it’s free and joyful and you can just tell the difference when she speaks to him vs to anyone who’s not her family.

her voice is so powerful in so many other ways. it shows weakness, strength, fear, love, and it’s all portrayed and executed in a way that’s purely majestic.

next thing is the parallels.

regina’s greed is eventually fully explained, she loses everything, but something i’ve noticed is that everything she loses is everything she’s never actually had.

her mother’s approval, daniel, henry, hell even graham. something archie says in s2 is that everything she loses is because of magic. i think that’s true and they should’ve extended that theory further throughout the show.

her mother never truly loved her — only taking advantage of her daughter’s weakness, her need for love.

i’m not sure if this is stated, but i’ve always interpreted this way. i don’t believe she and daniel were together very long. yes, long enough to fall in love, but in ouat, that normally seemed to happen rather quickly. anyways, regina was this close to marrying daniel until cora killed him. she never truly had him in the way she wanted — and we all know nothing happened in the way she wanted.

with henry, she, again, never really had him. he was never her son, not in the way she needed him to be. he was always emma’s son, even if it felt like he was hers. yes, henry loves her, he cares about her, but at the end of the day, his determination to stick with emma in the earlier seasons always seems to overcome that.

the last one is obvious but graham could not feel anything. meaning, whatever regina felt for him, whether it was love, lust, or nostalgia, was not real. which, equals in false hope, false love, all that. (i say nostalgia because in my mind, regina sees daniel in all her past/current lovers.)

so, in conclusion to this little yapping session, regina goes several seasons with absolutely nothing. it hurts to say it, but that’s just the way her life was portrayed. now, i’m leading up to how her greed is involved in this, along with her almost drug-like addiction to magic.

she consistently goes after things she cannot have. an example of this is her attachment to children. in season two (?), regina takes away her fertility with magic to piss her mother off. this soon comes to bite her in the ass and leads to her adoption journey with henry.

maybe three times she tried to take someone’s children as her own. yes it sounds bad but there’s an explanation for that. since she can’t have children, regina’s greed for one only grows stronger. the first time she did this was with owen, a little boy who managed to get inside storybrook with his father — whom she framed for drunk driving and i believe child neglect (correct me if i’m wrong) when owen refused to live with her and abandon his father.

another time was with ava and nicolas, at the time known as hansel and gretel. after retrieving the iconic apple from the blind witch, hansel and gretel come back to regina’s castle and as a “reward,” she tries to invite them to live with her. she basically tried to bribe them, but their love for their father was so strong, so out of spite she uses magic to separate the twins from their father.

and lastly, throughout season one, she attempts to kill or frame emma several times. this is because of her attachment to henry — which this time is somewhat explainable. for once, she finally has the child she deprived herself of and all of a sudden, after years of trying to fully connect with her son, she loses him. as she did several times before. hence why i said henry was never truly her child.

ANYWAYS.😊 regina mills you are a being of majestic and conflicting things that make you the woman you are and i absolutely LOVE IT.

[andy-wm]

My thoughts on SEVEN, both the song and the MV, and what it says about Jungkook.

About the song:

My biggest take away from the song is that Jungkook has total confidence in his ability to keep his partner satisfied and entertained. Daily. He also has a good reason to do heaps of laundry.

Also, he gets to say Fu@k a lot (always fun) and his pronunciation has really improved since he collabed with that disrespectful a$$hole who's name i won't bother to mention.

Seriously though, i hope his adulthood will finally sink in for the people who still try to keep him in babyville.

From a musical point of view, he does get to use those magnificent pipes he has, and use them well. The song flexes his vocal range and has lots of dynamic movement. And he gets to rap. I can see why he would have wanted to sing it.

About the MV:

I have a few observations about the mv and the relationship represented. I know it's meant to be lighthearted but that doesn't mean it shows us a healthy relationship so i'm gonna say my piece. Sorry if it's a downer, feel free to skip.

The power dynamic between JK's character and Sohee's character is what i find interesting.

She's totally in control of their narrative the whole way through.

At the start, she's angry and berating him and he's just listening, his head down. Very submissive. Most of the time his hands are in his lap or on the table while she's gesturing to herself and even throwing her hands up. The only time his energy is up. Is when he pulls her away from the falling debris.

She's getting up to leave halfway through his response, too. She doesnt really give him a chance to respond.

Even though he tries and tries to talk to her, she's dismissive, rolling her eyes, ignoring him, constantly walking away before he can finish what he's trying to tell her. At one point she pushes him so hard he falls backwards. He's repeatedly risking his personal well-being to get her to hear his side, but even then, he's still completely submissive. He brings her flowers, he walks three steps behind her, he tries to make her laugh to break the tension so she will listen.

Theres only one point at which he is assertive and that's at 2.55 when he gets around in front of her.

When he does eventually get her to stop and hear him out, he takes the role of a supplicant. She is very much in control of the outcome. She eventually offers her hand, and then basically hauls him along behind her. He is trotting along behind her like a scolded child.

I found it a little hard to watch because JK isn't an actor. Not because his acting is bad but becuase it's really him.

I could be way off, i admit that, but i honestly feel that his character is responding exactly as he himself would respond. He's soft and sweet and gentle, but dammit he believes in them! He's trying his best to placate her even though she is giving him NOTHING back.

I hate that it reminds me of that damn hamburger incident (he's is a sponge cake. Pls dont hurt him, world.)

Anywayyyyy....

My take away is 2 things.

First one is, throughout the MV his character is "fighting *for* the relationship", which is different from fighting within the relationship. He wants this problem they have to be solved, and he's prepared to do the work. Go, you Jungkook’s alter ego.

Second one is, despite a lot of people seeing this as a,stalker situation, the power balance is very heavily weighted towards her. Also, she treats him pretty disrespectfully. If these gender roles were reversed, the comments would be very interesting...

Other than that i loved the aesthetic, the humour, and the energy.

But what does this overtly hereronormative MV tell us about Jungkook's sexual orientation?

I'll say it does not tell us anything about who he likes to do the horizontal boogie with.

He liked the song, and wanted to record it. I have no idea if he had any hand in the MV storyline. If he did, awesome. It's fun.

But let's be real about the likelihood of him coming out to the world through a MV. I'd say it's ZERO. Reality dictates that whatever his own orientation, the MV needed to represent the Jungkook (most of) the world WANTS to see. Dont forget, this song is more of a business decision than a creative decision for Hybe. We know SB had a big part in the processs, and that man is all about the dollar bills.

It's certainly not a personal statement from JK. Its a fun, summer song and he gets to say F◇CK a lot and flex his vocal chops. That's it.

Do i personally think JK is gay? Hell yeah. With bells on.

Do i think he would risk it all?? ('it' being a huge entertainment empire, his own and his friends' careers, social damnation, personal freedom, and the loss of his contact with ARMY)

No, absolutely not. Not for a song that he didn't even write. Not in his solo debut. Not in today's America (sorry American readers, the USA isn't a safe place to be queer right now).

An unrelated question:

Do i think he will show us something more substantial with his album?

I think he will. I truly hope so. I dont think he's going to sing about his orientation but i do think the songs will be meaningful and personal and I'll be quite suprised if there isn't a fair bit of queer subtext.

If he includes a hidden track and Jimin features on it, I will throw a party and sprinkle glitter EVERYWHERE.

Just for fun, here's some JK looking gorgeously gay...

Living his best life in the Butter MV

His gestures... so pretty

No words for this one (cr to photographer)

I mean he's not wrong...

[skaterfc]

Ooo what’s Niki up to in your rewrite? Does she still join the syndicate?

How perfect to follow the Jack Manifold question!! :D

Yes, she still joins the Syndicate, and the Syndicate even has a bigger cast of members this time around! But eventually, in the epilogue of the story basically, she sort of retires from the syndicate and goes to live in Snowchester.

At first, in her Team Rocket mindset and her post-doomday mental heath crisis, joining the syndicate is great for her mental health. Having people to rely on and that listen to her is really important to her and really helps this first stage of her character growth! She is still working on her underground city underneath Kinoko Kingdom with the hopes that one day all her friends will come down to live there with her. (i especially wanna say that this is totally a metaphor, at least in my version, for her wishing that people could be there with her in her bad mental state she could have people to relate to. But as a consequence would have the other people's mental health suffering as well. the best thing for her would be to leave the underground, but she couldn't see herself doing that, leaving to live with the syndicate. After all, when you are in the depths of depression and mental health crisis, you can't see a world where you are ever out of it).

Niki DOES NOT help to free Dream from prison. In fact the syndicate has no involvement with Dream's prison breakout, thats all Punz and Enderwalk!Ranboo. Then once dream does break out, as I said in the last post, he gets up to some SHIT and the server decides to form a rebellion to strike back at him!

When the syndicate allies with the Rebellion to take down dream, she moves into the underground area the rebellion is stationed out of. A side effect of this being that now she is constantly around the people that she sort of hates and used to be her best friends back in L'manburg. But this tight nit community, being around these people constantly, actually is the next big step to her healing arc. Where she is reminded that what she was searching for all this time was the community and sense of belonging that L'manburg gave her. In fact, this experience of her reconnecting with Tommy, Tubbo, Fundy, Eret, and even cWilbur, encourages her to show some of the newer members who never got to see Golden-Age L'manburg what it was really like. This changes their perspectives becuase they always thought it was either like new L'manburg or worse and they never understood why these guys had so much devotion to it. But now they do! She also starts up a little bakery shop in this underground area and works to expand and decorate it to make it feel more home-y.

She's then later involved in 2 major battles against dream, as well as the final fight! And like I said, after the whole thing is said and done, She goes to live in snowchester with Tubbo, Jack and Puffy. (oh yeah, she's still dating puffy! though they prolly had some rocky moments with everything going on) To help once again foster that sense of community and be around people that care about her. She doesn't quit being apart of the syndicate though.

Thank you so much for the question!! Love getting to put my character knowledge to the works! If you think there is anything aggressively ooc in here, let me know! the rewrite is not technically finished yet and I want to make sure everything is sound as can be!

[trikruismybitch]

STORY PROMPTS I MADE WITH CHARACTERS

Feel free to use them (tag me) even if you change the characters!

(Mainly angst bc i was going through a bad breakup ):

• Wandas your soulmate but she leaves/chooses Vision instead (said the stones connect them in an even more powerful way then the words on your hip) Your left heartbroken. Natasha isn’t close to you but she knows how it feels to be rejected so she becomes your rock through the pain. (Your Soulmark slowly fades away) One day new words appear on your skin on your wrist (or over your heart) they’re the first words Natasha spoke to you. (Nat x Reader, PastWanda x R)

• Hope and Reader are dating and so are Josie and Landon. Turn out Hope and Landon cheated on their girlfriends with each other. They end up finding out and breakup with them. They lean on each other bc they can both understand what they’ve been through they end up falling in love tho. Josie x Reader endgame based off of Rush by Lewis Capaldie and Jessie Reyez

• Hope & Y/n are dating. Y/n finds out Hopes cheating on her with Landon and at first denies it until the evidence it basically

• Natasha and R were dating but Nat was a push and pull so R ends it bc Nat was too hot and cold and leaves New York and ends up in National City ends up dating Kara but Kara basically acts like R needs constant protecting etc. (based off of All I want Olivia Rodrigo) R tells Kara she can take care of herself and has proven it time and time again but Kara continues even Alex tries w/ Kara but Kara constantly treats R like a damsel in distress. Avengers end up in National City with Nat wanting R back . R has to choose Nat or Kara or Herself. (readers vote in who Y/n ends up with!)

6. Carol Danvers x Reader (That’s us by Anson Seabra) off n on again relationship. At first it was steady but Carol was away and Y/n was always so busy. They love each other very deeply but it’s like the universe is making everything against them but time and time again they find their way back to each other. Ending is probably open ended.

7. One night Wanda’s walking home from the library when she looks up and sees you standing on the edge of a roof. Everyone goes about there business no one seemingly notices. She goes into the alley and flies up when she gets there she watches as you sit on the ledge leaning your stomach against the pole that wrapped around the ledge. You pull out a joint and smoke when she creeps on behind you you must’ve sensed her coming bc you pulled out your headphones and looked at her. Dialogue prompts - “I’m not going to jump, don’t worry” you say notices the worry in the strangers eyes, “Why are you sitting here then?”, “Because I want to jump but I won’t”, “You want to but you won’t?, “Yes, everything in me screams at me to jump to finally have peace from this beautifully broken world but I won’t. I cant leave my family no matter how much I want too I don’t want them to have to bear the pain of my death.” “It might be selfish of me to want to leave but it also feels selfish of them to make me stay. If I’m unhappy with my life why not do something to fix that unhappiness right? But I can’t because they’ll be in pain and they’ll hurt. No matter what I choose I lose.” “Have you always felt like this?”, “The thing with depression is, it never goes away, no matter how much medication you take, how many years go by, it’s there. It’s always there.”

8. Y/n is Jules sister and when Nate Jacobs gets kicked off the football team they need a new QB which is Y/n. Cassie and Maddie both find her attractive and make a bet to see who could score a date w/ her first. They ask her all kinds of questions about if she likes anyone etc. she answers them and some of the questions point to her liking one of the girls. They ask if it’s anyone they know and she replies with yes. Eventually they get tired of the back and forth and ask her which one of them she likes (they’d go on ‘dates’ but Y/n always thought they were friend hangouts) bc she can’t have both. Y/n confused asks what they mean and explain to which she replies she thought they were just being nice and trying to be her friend. She apologizes and slyly looks behind them to meet Lexi’s eyes and replies she doesn’t like either of them but Lexi and proceeds to ask Lexi out. See on Y/n’s first day at in town she ran into Lexi and they hit it off.

9. Y/n is a neurologist who has the powers of intuitive aptitude (she can learn things despite how complex it is extremely fast) things and ends up on the avengers. Y/n can’t really understand social cues so she’s kinda awkward but she studies humans brains and bases how she acts on what she’s learned. Natasha or Wanda has a crush on her and tries to ask her out or flirts with her but she doesn’t know they are. One of the avengers gets fed up with seeing Wanda or Nat (better yet both maybe a WandaNat x Reader) pine after Y/n and flat out tell Y/n WandaNat has a crush on her so Y/n goes up with them tells them to pick her up at 8 or something like that.

10. When Fury stops by in Age of Ultron he brings Y/n who has energy manipulation. She was in Struckers program except she didn’t volunteer she was taken. She knew pietro and Wanda but In a mission was captured by SHIELD (Coulson’s team) anyways she jumps at the chance to go help the avengers and try to bring Wanda & Pietro back on the good side. She saves Pietro but gets hurt kinda bad in the process Wanda kisses her which shocks her but reciprocates bc she cares deeply for her.

11. Y/n L/n loves Natasha has since they were children, problem is Natasha didn’t love her, not in that way. They always had each others backs and it was always Natasha & Y/n until Bucky Barnes. A series of events caused by Bucky lead to Natasha’s death. Y/n never understood what Nat saw in Bucky and no matter how many times Bucky fucked up forgetting date night, missing anniversaries, yelling at her for little things, coming homs drunk at 3 in the morning, she always went back to him. She’d tell Y/n “love is hard and who am I to give up on love?” Bucky gambling and getting into a deep debt unbeknownst to Nat costing her, her life. With Y/n telling Bucky “you never deserved her” “and you did?” “I would have treated her better then you ever could’ve. I loved her through everything and even if she didn’t love me I was always there for her, not you” She totally punches Bucky. No matter what it was always Natasha no matter how many times she broke Y/n’s heart she’d always choose Natasha. (Maybe a flash forward to Wanda x Y/n in the future. Y/n visits Nats grave the day after she married Wanda. Then again the day after Natalia (her daughter) was born. Y/n telling her she still loves her she’ll always love her and that she misses her and wishes that she could’ve met Wanda and Natalia. Another one where it’s been awhile since she’s visited her and she talks about how Natalia is so much like Nat when they were kids too curious for her own good, extremely smart, and she loves ballet saying she wanted to be like her Auntie Nat)

none of these are proofread and i wrote them when i was like 16 so don't judge and im just clearing my drafts rn lol

[noddytheornithopod]

Watching Star Wars: Visions! Individual reactions under the cut.

"Sith" by El Guiri Studios, Spain: I liked it! Not my favourite, and I did kind of feel like it was more about showing off the cool visuals, but it was still a neat little story about choosing your own path. I mentioned the visuals so I'll say, they're obviously the standout here. 3D animation but in a sort of painted style? And a lot of the backgrounds are like blank canvasses to be actually painted? Droid was cute, and the Sith looked cool. Not sure about the sabre designs, but I do like seeing a double blade with two colours. I guess to finally be free this woman had to accept the darkness would still be part of her, but it didn't need to define her? But yeah, nothing too special story wise, but cool visuals and some neat character designs. Also is it just me or did one or two shots of the main character feel kinda fanservicey? :v

“Screecher’s Reach” by Cartoon Saloon, Ireland: Well this one certainly surprised me. I don't know much about Irish folklore and I've never seen anything by Cartoon Saloon, but it's a hell of a first impression. Like at first, I just thought it was gonna be a cute little ghost story, some kids on an adventure. Of course, animation and visuals are great, that should be obvious. I thought the purple alien girl was pretty cute too. But then suddenly, things aren't what they seem. So the main girl is interested in Screecher's Reach and the others follow, but it turns out she has her own motivations. She has the typical "I want more than this" stuff from many protags, but the moment we realise the "Ghost" is actually a Sith, suddenly things get interesting. She separates herself from the others, something I didn't understand at first but it turns out this was her plan all along. She's confronted by the Sith, who seems to be modeled after a banshee, but eventually she's able to take their lightsabre and kill it. She makes it out to the relief of the others, but then we see another Sith appear. This was all a test for the girl. This Sith basically offered a way out of her current life of just work, and she took the chance, even if now she's basically forced to abandon her friends. This twist really sold it for me. Also, the Sith that comes to take her, she has a really cool design. 

"In the Stars" by Punkrobot Studio, Chile: I liked this one a lot too! This was my most anticipated short because I was curious about the real world inspirations of it being based on the genocide of the indigenous people of Tierra Del Fuego. I don't know enough to know if there's any specific references to certain things, but I appreciate Gabriel Osorio for trying to use this story to shed light on the dark side of his nation's colonial past. Animation had a cool style, it was actually CGI but if I didn't know better I would've assumed this was mostly stop motion, because they use a lot of techniques and aesthetic from that medium. Also appreciate they didn't need to be overly flashy and colourful, beauty can be found in more than just bright colours. Story was simple enough, but it's easy to get invested because these two sisters might be the last of their kind and the Empire has fucked their planet over. Also liked how the Force was incorporated for the most part, like the older sister was jaded after their mother died and lost hope and faith in everything, and the younger one while reckless still has that youthful idealism they need. The older sister realising she can still have the Force was nice, and the part where they work together and you think it's to stop the AT-ST but in reality they actually destroy the whole facility and free all the water is cool. Only real downside is... it's kind of a shame we don't have a mystical power that can make colonial resistance this easy. XP You can only do so much in 15 minutes, though. Still, I appreciate what they're trying here. And of course, they see their mother in the stars again. I do wonder if stuff about people joining the stars is something based on real beliefs of the people who lived in Tierra Del Fuego, actually. But yeah, even if it might be a bit naive and too hopeful, I still really appreciate this short. 

"I Am Your Mother" by Aardman, UK: Really liked this one. Really sweet story about a mother and daughter coming to understand each other better, but also as someone who grew up watching Aardman stuff, seeing Star Wars stuff in that style was just so cool. Like, one of the ships in the race looked like the Mantis from the Jedi games, and the ship of the snobby family looked like the Nubian ship from The Phantom Menace? And lots of fun little Easter eggs here and there. Also just some genuinely fun and amusing moments, and honestly the humour could even have a little edge. Like, we got a bra joke, and one of the main girl's pals seemed like he was about to drop an F bomb, lmao. Also, seeing Wedge in this way was pretty funny, and he looks delightfully goofy in Aardman stop motion. But yeah, had a blast with this one.

"Journey to the Dark Head" by Studio Mir, South Korea: Okay this one was pretty cool too. Seen Voltron in terms of stuff animated by Studio Mir, and I definitely saw a lot of the over the top action and epicness you'd expect from a show like that. Not too much to say, it just managed to have a lot of epic and striking moments and imagery, but they still were able to get some levity in. Liked the characters in it, too. 

"The Spy Dancer" by Studio La Cachette, France: I saw this one being hyped up, and it didn't disappoint. As mentioned in promotion, this is based on how some women would act as dancers for Nazis but secretly work for the French Resistance. Of course, animation was great and all that, but the story was surprisingly touching too. Like, the titular dancer sees the Imperial from her past that occupied her world, so it ends up seeming like it's a revenge story, but that's isn't very Star Wars, is it? Turns out the officer attending now is actually her son who was stolen from her by the Imperial she thought he was, and he even cut off his horns that species has and wears and eyepatch to hide the species' heterochromia. More Empire doing things real colonial powers do. I know the director, Julien Chheng, is Asian, not sure exactly but the surname seems Cambodia, which was a country France colonised, so I wonder if there's some backstory there. But yeah, this was really cool and surprised me quite a bit. A very different kind of war drama or thriller we don't see as much, it honestly felt kind of film noir with many aspects. I do wonder who that second girl was though, like I can't tell if she's just younger and working under the dancer or if she's actually her daughter (which would make her the Imperial's sister). But that aside, liked it a lot. 

"The Bandits of Golak" by Studio 88, India: Another I was curious about because I don't know much about the animation industry from South Asia. It didn't disappoint, I liked it a lot! They really embraced having an Indian aesthetic, with the designs and an amazing score. Also was surprisingly tense, seeing this guy and his younger sister on the run, especially knowing the sister is force sensitive. The Inquisitor was cool too, also eyy Purge Troopers! After being almost caught on a train, they make it to this other place that the brother was looking for, but before the Inquisitor can catch the sister, the old woman running the establishment reveals she's a Jedi and takes care of the Inquisitor. There's a twist too, with the sister realising she has to go to this safe house without her brother, because it will be the best way to protect her. A touching goodbye is had, even as they play bandits. Animation style was really cool, too. 

"The Pit" by D'Art Shtajio (Japan) and Lucasfilm: IDK if this is exactly my favourite, but I still liked it a lot! Made by Japan's first black owned anime studio, and directed by LeAndre Thomas, with Justin Ridge from Star Wars Rebels and Resistance co-directing. Damn. Some of it was a bit slower, but it was appropriate here, these prisoners were just digging a massive hole for kyber crystals. The montage where we see the city nearby built was cool. Also damn, who we thought was the main character actually dies. His I think sister continues tho. Also the whole "the Empire didn't build the city, we did", you can definitely do a socialist reading on some aspects here I'm here. Also, the girl turns out to be force sensitive in an ending twist. Surprised the Empire didn't fight back harder, but if their forces were really that small, I guess it wasn't worth it, especially if most of the city was out there. I guess it's cool we saw mostly nonviolent resistance, though?

"Aau's Song" by Triggerfish, South Africa: Last, but certainly not least. Not sure if this was stop motion, or it was like In the Stars and just used that aesthetic. Still a nice style though, with everyone looking like different toys. Very unique aesthetic and score. Also a nice story about Aau realising she can sing in tune with the force and uncorrupt her planet's kyber, but her father seems afraid to accept that and thinks her singing is making it worse. She eventually is able to prove otherwise though, with the help of a Jedi. A nice story, and also shows that you don't always need big epic conflicts for a compelling story.

So yeah, that's Visions Vol 2! Not sure I have a favourite yet, though my gut is kind of leaning to I am Your Mother just because of Aardman nostalgia, lol. Only short I thought was just okay was Sith, but even then there was much to enjoy there. Overall, the fact that we went global and therefore got more variety I think makes this even better than the first Volume of Visions, and even that was already something very special. I do hope in the future they continue this more global approach for the sub-brand.

[a-star-at-war-with-herself]

This is a perfect summary of why I preferred aquakane throughout most of my reading of Oshi no Ko.

I don't know if they will be endgame, and I will admit there's some stuff you could defend about aquakana, too. Honestly, it's quite visible the author is playing with both the ships while deciding where to go, like, eventually— the last few chapters have been quite harsh to swallow down, in a way? I don't know why, but while I shipped them the hardest at the start of the series, I started to be a little bit more confused now that we're coming to (maybe) a close.

The truth is, Aqua and Akane are very complementary and while Kana definitely has a charm of her own, it is true that Akane deeply understands Aqua and he feels comfortable around her. And if I had to judge the ship as if they were just outright normal people, I wouldn't have any doubts, they would be the endgame, they'd have to be, they'd be way too perfect not to and so on. But Aqua and Akane are not regular people.

I feel like they need to grow a lot before actually being compatible and ready for a relationship with each other, and while I hope we will see this growth in the manga, I'm afraid it might not be among the author's intentions to write such a thing. I still hope it is, though.

Akane needs to understand her worth. She values her relationship with Aqua almost exclusively out of gratitude because he saved her, and yes, I can understand it's a big deal. But she shouldn't throw herself away for a murder - a revenge she doesn't even question. She trusts Aqua so much and she wants him to be safe and happy so bad she's willing to be totally amoral about it and take full responsibility of his mental health, which is— totally not ok. Everything she does is to save Aqua, to help him. She's totally selfless in that sense and while I think this is very romantic, I also cannot be blind to how self-conscious she is at the same time. She's willing to remind Aqua that he's his own person and he has to act for his own good, but it's sometimes a little bit difficult to follow one's own advice and I'm not sure Akane actually grasps how important it is for herself to set boundaries in a relationship. Even when she got mad at Aqua for not telling her she was being followed and basically stalked by him, she still said she would have been fine with it if only he had told her. You can't really call it being aware of how wrong it is for her to see herself as a weapon Aqua can use whenever he likes just because she owes him one.

Aqua on the other hand needs to finally let go of his traumas and as of now I'm not sure Akane can be his safe shore. Not when her desire to free him of his hatred leads to pursuing the very same thing that's killing his mind.

I think Aqua wants someone who can understand his twisted mind, and Akane would be perfect at that. Someone who will look at his slaughtered heart and will hold him gently anyway. But he needs someone who can look at him firmly and tell him why he has to stop.

To be clear, I'm not sure Kana could have this role either. Kana is firm and blunt, but I don't believe she would be able to understand. And I'm quite positive Aqua would not follow the advice of someone who doesn't get him. When he asked Akane what he should have done, he did it because he knew Akane would have read into him. She would have been honest but considerate.

Akane is now trying to stop him, that's true, but I'm still unsure about how much of a growth it is. I'd like to see if it's just another card to play in order to desperately help him, or if she actually has matured.

And if it isn't the latter, I'm afraid she needs someone who'll encourage this growth. Just— Aqua's priority is arguably not that. He's willing to protect her. But how willing is he to see her grow? Sometimes preserving is not the same as nurturing.

Even if they ended up together after everything's said and done, as of now, there's still such a imbalance between the two parties, I'm kind of questioning how healthy of a relationship it would be. I'm ready to be disproved by the author, anyway. More than that, I hope to be proven wrong.

Has Akane ever made aqua smile? He always act like the perfect high school boy to kana and smilies sometimes but with akane he never does. And that’s why most people prefer aqukana than aquakane.

Smiling Aqua

Happy Aqua

Childish Aqua

Playful Aqua

Old man Aqua

Akane has seen those sides of Aqua, too. You know what else she has seen?

Flustered Aqua

Vengeful Aqua

Edgy Aqua

Vulnerable Aqua

Honest Aqua

Goro Aqua

Just to name a few. This is actually one of the reasons why I, personally, prefer AquaKane lol

[whoahoney]

Hi! So I ADORE your writing and I was wondering if I could make a smut request? I only ask because I know I can’t do it justice but I NEED it in my life.

So this is kinda based off of Unholy by Sam Smith…

So reader is married (or engaged either one) to a well off guy (in my head, I think Steve) but they’re clearly unhappy and only in it out of obligation. I’m thinking maybe their parents basically planned it and they were basically promised a comfortable life if they went through with it so they said fuck it. They kind of turn a blind eye to each other’s promiscuity, Steve/husband constantly at the strip club to visit a specific dancer that he’s kind of taken on as his mistress and reader finding her way back to her hot and heavy high school love aka Eddie who owns his own auto body shop in town.

So on nights when Steve/husband “works late”, reader finds herself needing a tune up in the dirtiest of ways. And it’s just down right filthy. Both of them. Ever since I heard the song, I could just see both of them simultaneously going behind each other’s backs with their lovers.

And maybe the ending can be like reader finally deciding to leave Steve/husband for her one true love, Eddie or you can leave it open to interpretation 😉

I. am. deceased. This awoke something within me. I definitely added more angst and fluff than necessary, but this fleshed out concept was irresistible.

The DRAMA. This’ll be a multi-parter! Your brain— I love it.

Thank you for sharing this with me 😭 I hope I did her justice 🤞🏼if you need a filthier smut concept you’re more than welcome to request again and again, babe 💖

What They Don’t Know

Mechanic!Eddie Munson x Married!Reader AU

Summary: Reader is in an unfulfilling arranged marriage with a mutual understanding: together for an easy life, not love. It isn’t until after Steve graduates college they come back to Hawkins and Y/n finds comfort in a face from a life long ago…

Content Warnings: fem/AFAB!Reader, mature themes, forced/arranged marriage, making out, angst, smut in later parts, setting up plot, fluff/comfort

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Y/n L/N was a good girl.

She was an only child; her parents making the decision so when the time came, passing down the mining business and their other riches wouldn’t be complicated.

She was molded into the perfect child from the first moment she was in this world, always striving to make her mother and father proud by doing the things they asked of her… But there was now something else she was expected to do to keep the good life close.

At the time, she was a senior in high school, having moved to town the year before. She ran in the same social circle as Steve Harrington, much to the delight of her parents.

The two families soon gravitated towards one another when Y/n’s family, who dealt in the mining industry, met Steve’s, who owned Harrington Jeweler’s in Indianapolis.

Unfortunately, Charles L/N asked for an investment from Richard Harrington that fell through; leaving Y/n’s family with a heavy debt. Not to mention the on again off again superficial argument between the two men over whose name the company would bear once the merge happened.

Eventually Steve’s father decided rebranding wouldn’t be enough. So he decided to strike a deal with Charles L/N; in order for the debt to be paid and the business to keep one family name, it only made sense (on paper) for their children to get married.

“You want us to what?” Steve had said, standing from his seat. Y/n sat at the far end of the long oak dinner table, mouth hanging open in shock and her eyes already fading a thousand miles away.

“Steven, if you’d just listen—“

“No, dad! I don’t wanna listen anymore! You can choose what electives I take, my friends, the sports I play, the college I’ll go to, the business I’ll work in, but you can’t just tell me—“

“Steven! Sit. Down.” Richard Harrington barked.

Steve’s rant ceased immediately, sitting back down in his chair as if his father’s command had taken over his own free will. The shame in himself was no secret as the grimace shown on his face, his stare burning through the fine China plate.

“This is what’s going to happen: you’re going to get married, and you’ll each receive a share of your very own— on top of your trust fund. As long as you stay together, you won’t have to worry about anything, it’s simple!” Richard said before taking out a cigarette to smoke.

“W-What about college? What about Boston?” Y/n asked her parents, unaware of Steve’s concerned gaze on her.

“You won’t need it! You’ll be a housewife! Besides, you’ll go with Steve to Hartford while he’s playing ball at school, that’s close to Boston! You can see it whenever you feel like making the trip.” Her mother urged.

“Welcome to the housewife’s club!” Steve’s mother cheered with a raised glass.

Y/n didn’t dare mention Eddie, though the mere thought of him at this time nearly sent her head spinning. She needed to get out of here before she suffocated or hyperventilated or blew the fuck up spontaneously.

“We’re doing you a favor here, kids, you’re both single, you’re already friends—you’ll grow to love each other, I just know it!” Virginia L/N spoke up, Steve’s mom, Deborah, nodding vehemently in agreement.

For a moment Y/n heard a deafening ringing in her ear. Her dreams of the coast in Boston were no longer in the realm of possibility, let alone a career. “And if we don’t?” Y/n spoke up, her face blank as a brick wall.

“And if you don’t, you’ll quickly see you aren’t cut out for the life of the working class— you can kiss all this goodbye, and I mean everything.” Y/n’s father spoke gravelly while cutting the rest of his steak, his hard eyes on his daughter.

Y/n and Steve exchanged nervous glances from the far ends of the table; Steve rubbing his clenched jaw and Y/n chewing the inside of her lip. Steve shook his head at her once before looking back down at his empty plate, the prongs of his fork pressing down on the pink rose blooming on the face of the dish.

“So no objections?” Richard asked, looking between the two, setting a chuckle free when the two remained quiet. “Well, Charles,” Richard began, pouring the special champagne that sat in an ice bucket for the duration of the meal, “Looks like… we’re going to be an official family business.” Clink.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

It would be a long four years before the new Harringtons came back to the empty old family home in Hawkins, Indiana. Boxes scattered throughout the house holding decor that was mostly wedding gifts or handed down from their parents.

The relationship between Steve and Y/n barely changed—if anything they took a step backwards after the news of the engagement. The two were just becoming close within the circle of friends, Y/n having made fast friends with Steve’s friend Robin.

Steve always seemed to be at a distance to Y/n, his eyes hard and vacant when she spoke in the group, though he was never mean. Only uninterested.

He tried, he really did, though he couldn’t get himself to look at her that way, and credited it mostly to his father. He could see Y/n being his type—had he held a choice in the matter. But of course, Richard must come along and ruin what could’ve been. Now part of him couldn’t help but be repulsed by the girl no matter how innocent she was in the matter.

Even if Steve had taken interest in Y/n before the arrangement, there would be another obstacle deterring him from his goal; Eddie Munson.

The minute Y/n was introduced to the group, Eddie was hooked. He loved her strong yet quiet nature and hung on every word she uttered in conversation. Though he quickly learned he needed to stand next to her if he wanted to hear what she had to say.

Y/n was entranced by Eddie’s outgoing and charismatic personality, his striking wit never failing to make her giggle until she couldn’t breathe. He thought she was the best thing ever.

At the time of the engagement, they’d been in the beginnings of their official relationship after spending the better part of a year pining after one another. Even Steve was almost to the point of spelling it out for the two, but they finally got it together and went on two dates before the Harringtons made their deal with the L/Ns.

As soon as the two were excused, they were out of their seats. Steve went upstairs to his room, Robin on his mind and only a call away.

Y/n was out the door and down the road in her new car—a graduation present from her parents that she now saw as a ploy to butter her up.

“Guess she didn’t want to see the ring, yet.” Deborah Harrington sighed, throwing back the last of her drink.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Eddie’s ears perked up at the sound of the smooth purr of the Mercedes pulling up by his window.

He immediately set down his guitar and straightened up his room a bit; fixing his bed and then grabbing all of the dirty cups and paper plates he could hold in his arms.

He rid himself of the filth just in time to hear her timid knock at the door. Eddie flew to it with a smile on his face, excited for the unexpected visit, when he opened the door to find his sweet girl utterly destroyed.

“Eddie…” she whispered through the tears.

“Hey! What’s wrong? Come inside, babe.” He helped her in, his arms engulfing her frame and leading her to his room to sit down like always. “I-I’m so sorry, I know Im not s-supposed to be here tonight—I should’ve called—“

“Those words are no good here—total nonsense, sweetheart. Talk to me. Did your parents say something to you again?” He asked, searching her face for answers. He worried further when her eyes wouldn’t meet his, even going as far as closing them to avoid his gaze as tears rushed down her face.

“Y/n, c’mon. It’s me, you can talk to me.” He urged quietly. Tears prickled at his eyes because deep down he knew things were ending before they even got started.

He cupped her jaw and leaned his forehead against hers. Her eyes remained closed as tears continued to flow freely. She soft sobs confirming his worries as she shook her head, her teeth still tingling from the heaving breaths she’d taken on the way over. “M-My parents… they’ve—I have to— it’s not my choice, I mean it is, but it’s—my options aren’t good here!” She said exasperatedly.

“Just breathe for a second and-and just let me hold you, yeah?” Eddie quietly suggested. Y/n nodded, putting her head where it fit the nicest in his neck, his natural musk paired with his cologne making her melt and ache for him. He pulled her forward to sit on his lap in an embrace. His cheek rested on her head as tears escaped the corners of his eyes, his body having much practice containing the sobs that were wracking him inside.

“I really like you, Eddie, you make me—they don’t—” She choked out, her voice quaking yet still holding strength, her nervous hands went to work fiddling with his shirt. She felt his chest inhale deeply against her head, the idea making her stomach drop.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. You can say it—do what you have to do.” He said with a nod, his voice a strained whisper. She shook her head, a sob escaping her. She leaned back, her eyes staying at his Adams apple.

“I don’t wanna.” She hiccuped.

“Did they find out?” He asked meekly. She shook her head and sobbed. “They want me to get married.”

Eddie stiffened and swallowed hard, “They got someone in mind already?” He nodded as if he were expecting it.

“They have someone, alright.” She confirmed in a flat whisper. Her hands found his, her heart leaping when his fingers instantly intertwined with hers and then sinking when he held onto them firmly, like a life line.

“They told me tonight—that I’m engaged.” She said.

“—Steve? Of course it’s fuckin’ Harrington.” He said through his teeth, his voice breaking. Her eyes involuntarily found his at the sound.

She took him in; his watery eyes a shade of pink she hadn’t seen in them before, his cheeks glistening with the tears that flowed down his face without shame. His lips were worry bitten, red and puffy and wet from where he’d run his tongue over them innumerably.

“You make me so happy, Eddie.” She whispered after a moment.

His eyes gazed deep into hers, his face finally crumpling with hurt as he watched her let him fall apart in her arms, affirming him through her own tears as if her own life hadn’t been hijacked.

“You are kind, and smart, and… wonderful… any girl—“

“Don’t say all that, stop—“ He said, his eyes closing in protest.

“…you make me smile just at the thought of you, and everything makes me think of you, Eds, I’ve never met anyone like you—“ she continued, lacing her fingers in his hair to remember what it feels like. “I-I’ve felt things I’ve never felt before when I’m with you.”

“Y/n, please.”

“I thought it was gonna be you.” She whispered in a sob. Eddie froze, his eyes opening on her chin and drifting up again, reluctantly looking her in the eye and letting loose a few more tears as he blinked. She cupped his face in her free hand and he leaned into her touch immediately nodding.

“Me too, sweetheart... Me too.” He kissed her palm. When he looked back at her she couldn’t help but lean over and press her lips to his with a sob, starting gentle movement against him.

Their tears lingered on their cheeks as their noses pressed into one another, moans slipping out freely. Their hands roamed, paying extra attention to texture and shape.

Eddie clung to her, dragging his hands along the exposed skin of her arms and neck, kissing everywhere he could. Y/n tried to hold back the tears so she could see him clearly but the exchange was blurry. She wanted to desperately to say how she fully felt, look him right in the eye and say ‘I love you, let’s run away together.’ But couldn’t live with the guilt she’d take with her.

It wasn’t until Y/n slid her hand up Eddie’s shirt that things stopped, the boy’s face jumping back from Y/n’s who sat breathless on his lap staring back at him.

“W-we could…” She said quietly.

Eddie thought for a moment, his eyes closed as he leaned his forehead in to rest on hers again while he thought. After a moment his lip quivered as he shook his head ‘no’.

“I-I can’t do that with you just to lose you tomorrow, Y/n. That’s-it’ll kill me.” He managed in a whisper.

She sighed, her breath shaking as she did, though she nodded. More tears escaped as the understanding between them set in.

“S-So when you go away for college—“

“I don’t get to go anymore.”

“What?! Are you fucking joking? They can’t just take away your whole future—all your choices! C’mon, Y/n. You’re just gonna let them do that?” He asked with a scoff, anger bleeding into his sadness when she didn’t answer.

“Why don’t we just run away?” He suggested.

“Eddie, no! You have to finish school, and it’s not that simple anyway, if—“

“How? How is it not? What happens if you say no to all this? What—everything goes away?” He asked, his tears stopping for a moment while he spoke through clenched teeth. “He cuts you off? So it’s either me or daddy’s money?”

“No! No, Eddie it isn’t about you at all.”

“You’re right… you’re damn right it isn’t. It’s about you… and Steve.” He hissed, standing to his feet. “—Doing what every other rich kid would do in your position, either get married to the hot rich kid or lose the trust fund, I mean, what are ya gonna do?” He asked mockingly, going to his desk to stick a joint in his mouth, not bothering to ask her if she cared like he normally would as he lit it.

“It’s more than that Eddie, they owe a debt, they’re my family—“

“And it’s on you to pay that debt?”

“They’re my family, Eddie. What am I supposed to do, huh? Tell me, what would you do, Eddie the Brave?” She asked, her mouth twisted in hurt. “If Wayne owed a few hundred grand, and asked you to marry a decent person that you have no chance loving to get it forgiven— would you do it?” She stood, her eyes piercing through him.

His chest felt heavy with each drag he took, his nostrils flaring as the smoke escaped them like the dragon he could feel raging inside. His eyes softened after a moment, looking back up at her. “You know I would.” He spoke quietly.

She nodded. “I know.”

“He wouldn’t ask me to do that, though... He’d care about my happiness.” He uttered, finally finding the one advantage he had over a rich kid.

He sighed, his chest still for a moment before the sobs hit him again then pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes before he felt her embrace around him.

“W-When do you—“

“—I don’t know, sometime this summer before we leave for Hartford, I think. I didn’t really… stick around to discuss the details.”

“Just couldn’t wait to tell me the news, huh?” He asked, joking weakly as he ran a finger down her cheek, tracing the trail her sadness left.

She nodded. “Then we’re moving for at least four years… He’ll get his degree in business whatever… and I’ll sit inside and… rot? I don’t know...” She shrugged as Eddie tightened his grip, pressing a long kiss to the top of her head.

They stood there in silence for a minute before she need to leave in order to make curfew. “I don’t wanna let you go.” She hiccuped again, her face tense from how many times she’d fallen apart that evening.

“Y-You have to, baby.” He whispered in her ear, taking her arms from around his neck slowly and putting them by her sides. Their chests heaved, the hot tears slipping down their faces on the set tracks laid by the tears before them. She whimpered, a soft ‘no’ tumbling from her lips as he let go of her.

He inhaled sharply, taking her face in his hands and making himself look at her no matter how much it made his heart hurt. Her hands flew up to hold his wrists stroking him lovingly. “No matter what you do or where you go, my… feelings for you will follow, Y/n. I’m not sure I’ll ever feel this kinda stuff again, so… thanks for… for making me feel things—for making me feel so…” his eyes glimmered with tears as he searched for the right word before he shrugged, “good. You make me feel so, so fucking good.” He chuckled bitterly, losing himself in her eyes replaying their time spent together.

“I should’ve—I should’ve asked you out sooner, you know. We could’ve—we should’ve had more time together, but—“

“This would’ve hurt so much more, Eddie.” She whispered, her eyes tracing his Cupid’s bow for her memory to stow away.

He nodded, “I know…”

Y/n hiccuped as he took his hands off her face, gently taking her hands in his and bringing them to his lips for a tender kiss. “I want you to have something to remember me by.” He mentioned.

Y/n nodded earnestly, Eddie immediately looking down to his rings and pulling off one that sat on his right hand and placing it in her palm. “I, uh, always kinda pictured I’d give this to my steady girlfriend, cause it was, uh, what my mom wore of my dads in high school, but uh, I’m seriously… into you, sweetheart, and I think… I think I always will be. And if you’ll keep it for me, I want you to—“

She threw her arms around him in a heated kiss, her tongue coming out to nudge his lips for the first time. Eddie groaned, his arms finding her waist as he opened his mouth, letting her lick into him.

She explored shamelessly, a heavy contrast to their few timid and exploratory make out sessions. Y/n, like Eddie, hadn’t had a real relationship before and felt it was best for them to take things slow, to which Eddie agreed immediately and respected because they both assumed they had more time.

“Please—“ Eddie muttered against her lips, his voice strained as his fingers tightened around her arms. Y/n took this as a green light and hurriedly took her kisses to his neck, working down the column of his throat and leaving love bites like she’d always planned.

“Y/n, please— you have to go, I’m sorry, I can’t.” He said with a firm hand on her, moving himself away from her embrace and avoiding eye contact as they stood in silence. “I can’t taste anymore of what I can’t ever have again, okay? Nothing else. Please.” He practically begged.

She shook her head immediately, “I’m so sorry, Eddie. I—I didn’t think—“

“Don’t apologize, I want it just as badly as you do, Princess.” He said, taking one small step to her, his hand poised to wipe the tears away before stopping himself and sighing.

“How am I supposed to let you walk outta here?” He whispered, more tears welling up in his eyes at the sight of her in his doorway for the last time.

“Just… close your eyes.” She whispered, her gaze unwavering from his. He was hesitant, his brow crinkling at the prospect of the last glimpse of his love before she’s gone from him for good.

“It’ll be okay, baby.” She whispered, nodding at him assuringly. Eddie held back a whimper by taking a deep breath when he scrunched his eyes closed.

Y/n took him in, her heart crumbling at the sight of the boy she fell in love with so broken because of her. She looked down at her jewlery, searching for something to leave him. She took off both of her small silver hoops, and all of her silver rings and left them on his pillow along with a plain silver chain from around her neck that held her first initial.

“I want you to count, okay?” She asked, conjuring her strongest voice for him. Eddie nodded hesitantly but did. “J-just count to… to 50. Okay?” She asked, her mouth now dry and her heart racing.

Eddie’s eyebrows knitted together as he nodded, counting to himself in a slow mumble that quivered. “1… 2… 3… 4…”

She stood, and watched him until he reached 15, taking two steps away before he froze and stopped, seemingly waiting in anticipation. Without opening his eyes, he tilted his head down and stuck his chin out, as if searching for a last kiss.

She seized her opportunity and gently took his face his her hands, placing one last sweet kiss to his lips as the tears rained down profusely. It took them back to the tenderness of their first kiss they shared only a month before.

She pulled away, taking care not to touch him anywhere else as she stepped away. Eddie whimpered as his hand reached out blindly for her as she passed through the doorway.

She turned away from him before he sniffed and resumed counting from 15 with a voice thick with tears and heavy breath as he battled his body’s reaction to heartbreak, hoping to keep it in until he could hear her drive away. He prayed he counted loud enough he wouldn’t hear the screech of the screen door, which Y/n carefully opened and closed after much practice of sneaking in and out from the late movie nights spent here.

“35… 36…37—fuck— 38..”

Y/n ran over to her car, her sobs carelessly falling from her lips with every step she took. She yanked her door open and started the engine, jerking the gearshift into reverse before she could change her mind and tell Eddie to pack a bag.

When he got to 42, Eddie heard the spin of her tires throwing gravel as she sped out of the park, his feet moving before he realized he was yanking the front door open and calling after her from the front yard, his face cold and wet against the early spring chill

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The Harrington wedding came and went in the summer, a fancy wedding at a cathedral in Indianapolis despite neither of the families being catholic, or religious for that matter. Their friends attended, except for Eddie, who sent his well wishes with Dustin in the form of a single white rose.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

When the time finally came, Steve Harrington graduated college. Did he have tons of help over the phone and utilize his knowledge thirsty genius friend? Absolutely. But his name was on the diploma, and that meant it was time to go back to Hawkins.

Steve was ready to be back home with his friends, but he entered the county line with a sour taste in his mouth at the thought of seeing Nancy. He knew she had long since moved on, thinking the four years without contact and a new wife would help. But alas, love does not know space or time, and just because you live in close proximity with someone doesn’t mean you’ll fall in love.

Y/n spent most of her evenings since returning to Hawkins unpacking and decorating until she couldn’t stand it anymore. She could only rearrange the furniture so many times before Steve got annoyed, which was more often than not lately.

Steve spent a lot of time in the week staying in Indianapolis like their parents did, though Y/n didn’t mind, his absence wasn’t ever a problem. Steve never woke her coming in late since he had his old room, claiming it’d feel weird to take his parents room.

Even in Hartford the two had separate rooms in the apartment, practically the worlds crappiest roommate situation. Y/n had sank deeper and deeper into the throes of her sadness, each night feeling so small and cold in the large bed. The smell of clean linens brought tears to her eyes many nights while she wished so hard to recall the way Eddie’s pillow smelled.

She knew where Steve spent his time, and it wasn’t like it bothered her in the way it would bother the majority of other wives. She just craved companionship—anyone’s. She’d hoped that at the least the two of them could be friends, maybe have nights with Robin like they did before their parents married them off.

Instead, Steve wished to spend his free evenings at the Dollhouse seeing ‘the most beautiful girl in Texas’, Dallas Rose.

The first time Y/n found Steve at the Dollhouse was a complete accident. She’d called Robin and asked if she’d heard from Steve, since he’d failed to come home for dinner.

Robin informed her that Steve had called her a couple hours earlier and gave her the number to the ‘gentlemen’s club’ he’d be meeting at, not knowing Steve’s true intentions

Y/n was stunned, only because she didn’t peg Steve as the strip club type, but shrugged it off and wrote down the number on the back of her hand. She hung up and dialed the number immediately, a smirk on her face when a chipper voice sounded on the other end.

“Dollhouse! How can I help you?” A woman said.

“Hi! This is Robin Buckley calling for Steve Harrington.”

“One moment, please!”

The line clicked and sultry R&B music played for the hold music. After a moment, the line clicked with the sound of the phone being lifted from the receiver followed by “Hey, Robs, what’s up?”

Y/n scoffed with a smile, “Y’know, I made chicken breast for dinner, Harrington, you didn’t have to go all the way to the club to see some tits.” She laughed into the mouthpiece sounding unimpressed.

“Wha-Y/n?! I-I can ex—“

“Save it, Steve, you and I both know I don’t care. I just assumed you had a girlfriend you were staying with, is all.” She shrugged honestly.

Steve stuttered into the line, running his hand through his hair and rubbing his tired eyes as he tried to make sense of the conversation between them. “A—W-We’re married. I wouldn’t have a girlfriend—“

“Yeah, well if you want some, go get some, you have my blessing. Just don’t keep me in the dark, alright? If you’re gonna be anything to me, I want you to be honest.”

And that was the last secret Steve kept from his wife.

She really didn’t expect anything to change once they got back to Indiana, especially not in the way things did.

Steve would call and check in every couple of days or so, the two feeling some sort of obligation to keep tabs on the other’s wellbeing. “I’m, uh, staying here again tonight, so… you don’t have to make me a plate or anything.” He mumbled into the mouth piece.

“Okay, no worries.” She sighed, the conversations between them always making her head pull her away to somewhere else—anywhere else. Steve related, his ears only half listening as he colored in a few boxes on a spreadsheet he was struggling to keep from going cross eyed over.

The two wanted to be friends. They really did. Whether it was the never ending awkwardness of marrying someone you don’t truly know or love, disregarding the force behind it all, of course, or the fact they both knew they could never belong to each other no matter if they tried or not.

So they did each other favors when they could.

“Y’know, if you’re… feeling up to it, maybe you could, uh, take the car to the body shop in town? I forgot I called up there and made an appointment— wouldn’t wanna stand them up. It’s due for an oil change and I’m tired of seeing that scratch down the side.” Steve mumbled, telling a half truth and hoping the rumor he heard wasn’t just.

“Uh, yeah. I can do that for you. Anything else?” She asked as if it were any other chore he’d request from her.

“Uh, nope. That’s all. Call me later and let me know how it goes.” He said before hanging up, mentally facepalming himself for forgetting to leave a call back number or at least tell her bye.

The abrupt cut of the line made Y/n flinch, her gold jewlery rattling on her wrists. Y/n hung the phone up on the hook, looking at her kitchen that was taking shape. She looked at the corner next to the glass doors that led to the patio, gasping when she remembered the hazy night spent here one late winter evening in 1986.

Steve had thrown a small get together for his friends and a few cliques from school that were deemed worthy enough, like the band, theatre, and art kids Robin insisted on inviting, Y/n being one of them. She’d said maybe two words to Steve all night, eagerly waiting for her date to show up.

In typical Eddie fashion, he was an hour late, Y/n feeling tipsy, high and discouraged when he found her slumped in the corner with shiny eyes. He was breathless as he jogged up to her.

He’d frantically explained how his van wouldn’t start and his back up ride fell through last minute so he ended up running the whole way to Steve’s. Y/n sniffed and chuckled, throwing her arms around him before he could finish his story. The boy was relieved, immediately accepting her embrace and threw his arms around her and gaining control of his breath.

“Thanks for being patient with me, sweetheart, it means the wor—wait, were you crying?” He asked once he took a good look at her face.

Y/n gasped softly and shook her head insistently though the two tear tracks beside her eyes were indicative of her white lie. Eddie tsked as he pushed her hair behind her ear.

“I think it’s really sweet of you to try to preserve my feelings or try to be tough, or whatever, but I simply will not stand by without righting a wrong I’ve made. Especially with you. Did you think I wasn’t gonna—“

She nodded, one more year escaping as she bit back an embarrassed chuckle and wiped her face. “Can I fix it?” He asked, finding her gaze with his eyes by bending down.

She scoffed, “You didn’t do anything, Eddie, I just got nervous.” She shrugged.

“Why?”

She rolled her eyes in embarrassment, her cheeks burning as his hands found hers. “Cause I like you, in case you were unaware…” she said quietly, keeping her eyes on the collar of his shirt as a familiar warmth washed over her, her thoughts quickly wondering what it’d feel like to sink her teeth into the side of his neck before she shook her head at herself for being so crass.

“Well, Princess, in case you were unaware… I’m kinda crazy about you.” He spoke lowly next to her ear. “If there’s anything I can do to make it better…” He said almost suggestively. Y/n giggled, before sipping her drink, which Eddie just noticed reeked of whiskey.

“Y/n!” He gasped quietly with a teasing smile. “I never thought I’d see the day. What would mommy and daddy say?”

“Mommy and daddy aren’t here, besides, it isn’t like they don’t drink gallons of this shit anyway.” She scoffed making Eddie laugh. He loved seeing her relaxed, he knew she had it in her.

“Have you done anything else considered questionable in my absence?” He asked with curiosity twinkling in his eye.

She smiled, her nose wrinkling before she looked down in embarrassment.

“Ope! What’d she do?” He asked quietly, stepping a little closer til her back leaned against the wall as he placed his hand on her waist, bending down closer to smell her hair once more before a light bulb went off in his head, “Oh, sweetheart, did you smoke weed without me?” He looked back up at her with pleasant surprise.

“Seems as though we’re even, now.” She said with a smirk. Eddie shook his head gently.

“No, I don’t think we are.” He said to her lips, his hand drifting up to graze her chin as the world around them faded away. Y/n’s eyes stayed on his perfect full lips, sparks nipping at her chin where his skin brushed hers before taking hold of it a little more firmly.

“Eddie, will you please kiss me?” She whispered right before he closed the gap, their mouths moving in tandem from the start. Eddie hummed a groan of satisfaction against her as his eyes fluttered closed, his body seemingly melting against her. Their arms couldn’t hold the other close enough, but the slow sweet kiss they shared sent them spiraling into bliss.

When the fog lifted, Y/n turned to the counter and grabbed Steve’s keys, rushing out the door before she could look back.

Part 2

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Taglist🤍

@loving-and-dreaming

[gucciwins]

Are you Angel?

Harry gets hurt while on the job and Y/N gets a phone call she was not prepared for.

Word count: 7413

A/N: hello friends, it's been a while :) this is a continuation to my story Trouble Follows. You don't have to read but it will give you an insight of how Y/N and Harry met. I am thrilled to share more of firefighter harry with you. I adore him and I hope you do as well.

please do let me know what you thought of the story and please reblog! <333

Warnings: angst, breakups, hospitals

A firefighter will always run into a burning building with not a hint of hesitation. All their focus is on saving the people stuck inside.

Running towards trouble is second nature to them.

She knew that.

She also knew what it meant to date a firefighter.

The unreliable hours, the non-frequent communication, the many failed dinner dates. The twenty-four hours shifts when he would then arrive home to just sleep.

Harry had begun to give her a constant comfort that he would eventually come home and climb into bed behind her. He would then gently nuzzle his face in her neck, taking in her sweet honey scent. In contrast, she took in the woody ashy smell that seems to be permanently stained on him.

So trust her when she said she knew what she was in for when Harry asked her to be his girlfriend.

Four months in, she knew she would be here for a long time, maybe forever, if life would allow it.

She was sure; she knew what to expect.

But she didn't, not until she got the call.

The call that would shatter her heart.

The call that would lead her to be sitting in this uncomfortable, ugly brown hospital chair, holding tightly onto his ashy hand. As she prayed on and on to a God, she no longer held close but wished for Harry they were real and would bring Harry back to her.

Y/N prayed for Harry to finally open his eyes and give her a reassuring smile that he would be okay.

That they would be okay.

Until then, she'll wait.

Harry being Lieutenant allowed him to have a consistent schedule. That did not mean there weren't days where he had to pull a double shift or stay back to finish paperwork; he let it pile up.

The one day that was Y/N's was Sunday.

She got him an entire day to lay in bed together and eat all the baked goods she baked for him to try. It was becoming their day. Everyone at the station knew Harry could not be disturbed on Sundays unless it was the end of the world, and even then, they'd have to pry him away from Y/N.

He feels safe in her arms. Harry had never felt that before. Sure, he was surrounded by his firehouse family, but he had never felt so loved in two arms as if she could take all his problems and stresses away. Still, she did exactly that when she would flash him her gorgeous smile and hold her arms open for him to fall into at the end of every day.

Harry knows he's never felt this way, and he won't ever take it for granted.

This Sunday will be different, and she feels it as soon as she wakes up because, in her queen-sized bed, she's alone. No arms wrapped around her waist; no head tucked into her necks as he places soft open kisses to wake her from her sleep gently.

Already, she knows this is going to be a bad day. She feels it in her bones. Having been around trouble for so long, she knows the difference between good and bad. The feelings she has made her want to find Harry and pull him back into bed where she can keep him safe.

Y/N gets out of bed, throwing the warm sheets off her body going to the bathroom to do her morning skin routine, wanting to feel refreshed for when Harry breaks the news; he's going to leave her alone on their day. She knows him well enough; he's cooking her breakfast to make up for leaving her so early in the morning.

She walks out of her bathroom, going straight to her closet and taking out the first sweater she saw. It's a baby blue color and stitched on the left side on top of her heart is: "love me please?" It's Harry's favorite sweater of hers because it's an oversized sweater that fits him well. The only reason she has it back is that he wanted her to wash it and wear it until it got her smell again. Y/N kissed him silly when he told her that, plus she loves that it smells like him now.

Y/N takes one look at her unmade bed and walks away, knowing she's going to crawl back in after Harry leaves her. She walks out and, from the hallway, can hear Harry humming away. If she's honest, she doesn't recognize the song. As she has come to learn, Harry has an interesting taste in music; he has basically heard every song ever to exist. It's a reason they are so good at Four Clovers Thursday Trivia night. She dominates pop culture and films, and Harry takes on music. She's also better at history than him. Their friends love trivia night because their winning always gets them free drinks. It's something she looks forward to each week.

"Morning, H," Y/N says as she approaches him from behind and wraps her arms around his waist. Harry smiles, instantly feeling warm with her arms around him.

"Morning, firebug. Sleep well?"

She mumbles a no, causing Harry to laugh, and she feels it vibrate through her.

"Awe, upset I wasn't wrapped around you." He teases. "I'm making up to you by making breakfast."

She pulls away, spotting blackberries on the counter. "Sure, Jan."

Harry can hear the change in her tone and knows she's still goofing off with him but knows she's upset.

"Angel, come sit. Coffee is ready."

She shakes her head but makes her way over to the chair he pulled out for her. "No coffee. I'll be going back to bed soon." Y/N waits to see if he'll correct her, but he doesn't.

"I'm sorry." He begins.

"No apologies."

"Please let me. I'm leaving you on our day." He pouts.

"As much as I don't want you to go, I'm sure they need you more than I do."

Harry frowns, "I hope you'll never stop needing me." He whispers against her lips before closing the gap. Y/N hums against his soft lips allowing herself to get lost in the moment; she loves his kisses, soft and gentle just as he is despite what his sharp eyes might have one believe.

Harry pulls away after pressing one final kiss on her pouted lips. "I'm sorry I have to go to work, but I know for certain that I can meet you for a late lunch."

"Lunch?" She repeats, arms wrapped around his waist, hoping he was serious with his offer.

He hums. "Yes, 2:30, that bistro with that avocado dressing you like for your sandwich."

"It's a date." She grins, laying her head on his chest letting him hold her tight. He unwraps his arms, letting her go.

"I've got to get going, firebug, but I'll see you later."

"Stay safe, Styles." She tells him as she does every time he leaves.

"Try my best, angel."

With that, he slips his beat-up white Vans with lilac laces and walks out the door; it shuts it behind him. Just as Y/N steps towards it to lock up, it opens back up, startling her. Harry steps back in, and before she can question him, he places both faces on the side of her face and kisses her breathless. Y/N is quick to react, allowing their lips to move in perfect harmony, not as smooth but perfect, nonetheless.

"I--" Harry begins before he clears his throat. "I'll miss you, angel."

Y/N feels the heat rush to her cheeks because, for a moment, she thought he'd say another three words. "And I'll miss you, H. Now get out of here; I don't need you showing up late to our lunch date."

Harry smiles, dimples on full display, hugging her before walking out a skip in his step. She peaks her head out, making sure he gets in the car safely before he drives off. He sits there for a moment, and she knows he is letting his Bluetooth connect as he waits for his drive-to-work playlist titled "it's time" to start playing. He takes a look at his mirrors before backing out and driving. That's when Y/N closes and locks the door.

Time to go back to bed for a few more hours; what else is there to do on a Sunday when she's left alone.

Harry genuinely did not want to go to work today, but it's not like he could say no to his Chief. His Chief was never one to call in favor unless it was an emergency. He didn't ask, knowing he'd get the full story Monday, but for now, he gets on his pants, t-shirt, and boots and hopes there are no fires today.

The only thing is that Harry isn't used to working with the B-shift, sure he knows everyone's name and a little of their lives, but they aren't his usual team. He shakes that off because he knows he would do anything to help a team member and knows they would do the same in return.

Harry is lost in thought, wondering what Y/N was going to do today. He knows she planned to take him to a butterfly pavilion today even told him the outfit she had planned out for it. A pair of jeans that had flowers embroidered all over something she added, saying she thought they looked a bit plain, pairing it with a pastel pink top. Harry was surprised with her style after meeting her various times in different outfits. He was surprised at how soft she dressed in pastels. She may have a bold personality, but her fashion was delicate and warm. It was a nice balance.

He nearly runs into Carols as he made his way to his office, too busy thinking of the girl he left at home. "Sorry, bud."

"No problem, Harry. Surprised to see you here," Carols tells him, everyone knowing Sunday was Harry's day off.

"Chief had something come up and asked me to come in. I should be out of here by eight tonight if we're lucky."

Carlos smiles, "with you around, we usually are."

Harry chuckles, telling him he'll be in his office if he needs anything. He looks around his desk and sighs at how much has piled up already.

Might as well get ahead.

It's a few hours when Harry realizes the house is quiet. He peaks around the window and figures they are all in the common room. It's only one, and thankfully there have been no calls, and if it continues, then he will make it to lunch with his angel.

He shoots her a text.

Angel

13:24 PM

I miss you. Counting down the minutes until I get to see you xxx

Harry clicks send and smiles down at his phone. 2:30 couldn't come fast enough.

As he gets up to stretch and go for a snack in the kitchen, he takes a deep breath because as confident as he may seem, he isn't around the second shift. They don't know him so well, and Harry ultimately is shy. He may be able to hide it, but he has small quicks that others pick up on. Something he knows Y/N spotted quickly, like when he toes his foot into the ground or when he begins to chip at his nails, and Y/N's favorite is when he moves his hands behind his back and sways side to side. She finds it endearing, but others might not think it's leadership material.

He walks into the lounge to cross to the kitchen when a few heads turn to him, but before they can say a word, the alarm rings, and Harry is literally saved by the bell.

Not a second to waste, everyone heads over to the rig and quickly suits up. Harry is Lieutenant meaning he's in charge of the scene today, seeing as their captain and Chief aren't here today. Harry respects all the firefighters and knows this will go well if everyone carries out their job.

It's a factory fire, and as soon as they arrive, Harry can see it's burning fast. He's not sure how many people are there, but he calls in for reinforcements knowing they will need all the manpower they can get.

"This is House 102; please send more units available. The factory fire is burning at a faster rate than we can control. My team is going in now. There are five people unaccounted for; the left side of the building is clear." Harry speaks into his two-way radio.

"Carlos," the young firefighter jogs over, eyes on Harry, no longer staring at the roaring fire. "You're going in with Baz. Stay close and don't go up the second floor; you need to be quick in and out."

"Who's going with you, Lieutenant?" Carlos asks, clearly worried.

"Jameson and Rey are coming with me; stay safe, and if anything happens, just radio in."

"You got it!" Harry pats his shoulder and walks off towards the two waiting men.

Harry knows the men well, he trained them when they came into the house, but they preferred B-shift instead of being with him. One spot was available, and he knew they didn't want to be separated. Rey and Jameson have been dating for two years, but that's a secret only very few know. It's not prohibited, but if it gets more serious, one will have to relocate to a new station. They simply aren't ready for that, and indeed Harry would be sad not to have them around the house or hearing their stories. It just adds a more considerable risk because, at the end of the day, the job is first.

Rey walks towards the entrance with Harry following right behind. Jameson, a few feet back, calling out for anyone in there that needs help.

"Fire department, call out." Echoes out as much as it can as the fire begins to roar louder.

The heat gets worse the further they walk in; they turn right at the edge of a desk labeled "Torres."

"H, there!" Rey shouts, rushing over to a man knocked unconscious and had heavy storage struck over his legs, pinning him down. Harry and Jameson run over, assessing the man before making any sudden moves.

Jameson finds a pulse, weak but there. He gets the extra mask over the man's face hoping it'll wake him up soon.

"On the count of three, we lift," Harry tells the two men standing to a stand as the others do the same.

They nod. "One, two, three." They grunt in unison, pushing the container to a standing position. Harry looks over the man's legs and is thankful there is no blood, but there will be swelling and bruises. "Right, Rey, take him out. We'll keep searching."

Rey nods, lifting the man over his shoulder as he was trained to do, and rushes out of the burning building. Harry and Jameson have just learned a new area when the radio comes on. "Lieutenant Styles, it's Carlos. We found two men; only one remains unaccounted for."

Harry nods. "Got it, no one comes back in. We'll be out soon."

He now leads the way, making his way towards a stairway. There's no fire here, but it's moving faster, and smoke is thick. Whoever is in here might not last much longer without oxygen.

"Fire department, call out," Harry shouts, voice firm.

"Here.." a whisper is heard, both Harry and Jameson freeze. Once more, "here" is yelled but sounds muffled.

Harry looks around, not seeing anything but fire, and fears the structure will collapse soon. Just as he was about to yell again, he sees a can knocked, and a man hidden under a black rag is seen. Jameson rushes over, helping the man sit up. He's older, well into his sixties. He doesn't look too well; he has a few scapes.

"Right, we need to head out," Jameson tells Harry, helping the man stand up who is fighting consciousness.

"This is Lieutenant Styles; on our way out found the last man. Have paramedics on standby."

"Got it, Styles. Get out quick."

Jameson and Harry get the man up and head to exit. Harry can see the light of day and knows he will be late for lunch, but thankful Y/N is understanding and very forgiving. He'll make it up to her by buying dessert.

Just as they almost reach the door, a piece of dry wood comes falling down, separating Harry and Jameson; luckily, it did not hit them, but now Harry has to find a new way out. It's not looking good.

"Harry," Jameson looks panicked, but Harry stays calm.

"Get him out, now," Harry tells him, looking in every direction for what to do.

"No, I won't-" Harry cuts him off.

"Jameson, get this man out. He needs medical attention. That's an order." Voice full of authority with no room to argue.

Jameson nods and heads out. "I'm coming back for you."

Harry chuckles. He sees a small path, but it'd be a more extended way out. He debates what to do. He could wait, but the longer he stays, the quicker this building is beginning to collapse.

It takes him two seconds to decide to go right and find a new route out instead of staying put. He walks and only gets hotter as the fire begins to surround him. He's good at not panicking, always thinks better under pressure, but this is getting intense. Harry climbs over a crate and bends low to go through this tight space. He sees the exit, it's still a bit away, but he knows he is in the clear.

That's when he hears a big explosion knocking him forward. His oxygen masks flys off, landing a few feet away. As Harry reaches his hand out to get it, he's pulled back. He looks behind and sees he's stuck. There are crates stacked on top of him. The air is thick of smoke, and with no oxygen, it seems like the fire will soon enough engulf him.

Shit.

He's really in trouble now.

Harry presses his radio, holding it, hoping it's still working. "This is Harry," He coughs. "I'm trapped under a few crates. I can't reach my ask. I'm west of the building."

"Harry, hold on. We're going in." Harry hears Jameson reply, but he's fading quickly.

He shakes his head. "Can't go to sleep, but this smoke is too thick to actually see anything, let alone for his team to find him.

"Tell…" He coughs again, and this time doesn't stop for what feels like five minutes but is only a few seconds. "Tell angel, I'm sorry."

A voice comes over the speaker, but Harry's eyelids are fluttering shut, the weight of the crates is too much, and the smoke only gets deeper in his lungs if he keeps speaking.

Harry welcomes the darkness as he sees the one person he was supposed to meet for lunch. She's holding an outstretched hand for him to take and who is he to ever say no to her.

Real or not, he goes to her, and soon enough, he falls unconscious, not feeling when his team lifts him out and puts him in the back of an ambulance.

Y/N decided to show up a bit earlier for their lunch date, putting in their order early, wanting to maximize all their time together. She wouldn't see him until late that night, and honestly, she wasn't a fan of being separated on her favorite day of the week.

She sits on a bench right outside, both sandwiches wrapped tucked away in a brown paper bag and a lemonade sitting next to her untouched. It was his favorite, too sweet in her opinion. Still, Harry loved it, especially since he wasn't one to indulge in sweets unless they were hers.

Knowing Harry could be running late, she pulls out a book from her orange tote bag that Harry gifted to her. The book was Beach Read, Frankie recommended it to her then gave her the book saying she needed to read more romance books and not just poetry and nonfiction books. She actually enjoyed it, which surprised her, but even if she didn't, she's too invested to not find out the ending.

She was just starting chapter five when she feels too much time has passed and glances down at her phone.

2:55

25 minutes late isn't bad or unusual even; she decides to put the book away and keep an eye out for him. Usually, when he keeps her waiting, he makes up for it with a long kiss that never fails to take her breath away; she's excited about it now.

Time seems to go slower when she just sits waiting. She debates beginning to eat her sandwich when her stomach starts to growl. It's low, but she would feel bad if she began to eat, and that's when he shows up. She settles for waiting and instead takes a drink of the sweet lemonade.

As Y/N sits waiting for Harry, her phone begins to ring and displays an unknown number but the city's area code. Every bone in her body tells her to prepare for the worst but hopes she's paranoid.

She takes a deep breath before answering and bringing the phone up to her ear.

"Hello, are you angel?" A deep voice man asks.

"It's Y/N. Actually, can I ask who's calling?" She's holding her breath; only one person calls her angel.

"I'm calling on behalf of Lieutenant Harry Styles. Harry has been in an accident and was taken to the hospital. He asked us to call an angel on his way to the hospital. We assumed you were one of his emergency contacts."

Y/N feels her hands begin to shake. "What hospital?"

The man on the phone rattles the information, and she lets it all sink in. He hangs up, and she sits there waiting on the bench for her date that will not be showing up.

Her phone rings again, she answers without looking at the caller.

"Y/N," she recognized the voice; it's Mitch, and if he's calling, then it must be true.

"Mitch," she whispers, not recognizing her own voice. It's shaky, tears beginning to well up.

"Where are you?"

"At the bistro a street down from the station." She replies, hoping he's coming for her.

"I'm close; we'll pick you up and go see him, darling." She nods but remembers he can't see her.

Y/N isn't sure why she's not crying. She feels the tears, but it's like they are stuck; her heart hurts, and she knows that says enough. "We were supposed to meet for lunch. I got worried when he didn't show up, but I didn't think--" he interrupts her.

"Harry is going to be fine, trust me. He's okay, and he needs us there."

Y/N doesn't reply because she sees him pulling in. Mitch is in the passenger seat, Sarah is driving. She doesn't say a word as she swings open the door and settles in the back.

She sets her hands in her lap; she can feel herself trembling. She can feel herself breaking because she won't know if he's okay until she sees him. Mitch can say he's fine, but she needs to see for herself.

Sarah and Mitch share a concerned look; Y/N doesn't notice her eyes looking out the window.

"Y/N?" Mitch begins, voice full of concern. "Do you- are you okay to go see him?"

"Of course." She replies quickly. "He needs me; well, I hope he does."

"Course he needs you. Needs his angel by his side." Sarah tells her calmly, wanting to see her smile, but it doesn't work because only Harry should be calling her that. She shouldn't be on her way to see him in a hospital bed. She should have seen him next to her on that bench as he ate his sandwich and gave her kiss and kiss as she told him stories.

They are silent the rest of the way. Sarah pulls into an empty parking space, and she rushes after Mitch, who seems to know exactly where Harry is as he rushes past the front desk. The only thing that slows them down is waiting for the elevator; she gladly would have taken the stairs if Mitch didn't tell her that he's on the sixth floor. Instead, she waits impatiently for the old elevator that will take her to see her love.

He is going to be okay. He has to be okay. Y/N keeps those thoughts running through her head as Mitch and Sarah guide her to room 613.

Mitch walks in first, holding the door open, Sarah places a comforting hand on her back, and Y/N feels supported and loved, but nothing prepares her for what she is about to walk into.

The constant beep of Harry's heart monitor is the only thing that can be heard in his private room. The beep is steady; it makes her let out a deep breath. The monitor already calming her down, she approaches slowly as if he'd wake if she'd walk any faster.

She sits in the uncomfortable chair next to his bed and pulls it as close as she can.

Y/N just stares at him, taking it all in. He looks like he's resting peacefully like he should originally have been when they started this day together. His curls are disheveled, his face dirty with smoke stains and a few gauzes wrapped around his arms. She can't see much else but knows he's got a road of recovery still ahead of him.

"Hi, Harry," she whispers, her hand slowly reaching under the white sheet to grab hold of his right hand. "I'm right here, okay. Take your time waking up; there's no rush. Just know that I'm not going anywhere."

She pauses, hoping for a reply even though she knows she won't get one. "We can also discuss how I'm sort of one of your emergency contacts."

Y/N presses her lips to his hand. "Need you to wake up, want to see those Rapunzal eyes." She sits back, not removing her hand from his. Sarah has not taken her eyes off of her, Sarah might feel like she might blow up soon, but being at his side, she has begun to feel better.

"Harry, we're here for you. The whole team is outside in the lobby, probably why they sent us to the floor with the biggest waiting area. Even young Carlos is out there, saying you gave them a scare but really hopes you never pick up another B-shift again." Mitch sniffles before stepping out of the room. Sarah walks over to where he was standing.

"Hey Harold, it's trivia night in a few days, and kind of counting on you to get us those free drinks." Sarah chuckles. "It's been a while since we've been in the hospital. I think it was when I made you all donate blood for that ambulance competition. Fun times, now you rest and get better. The good thing is you have the best nurse looking out for you." Sarah glances at Y/N, sending her a small smile.

Y/N sits back in her chair as Sarah sits in one by the window. She knows she's in for a long afternoon and an even longer night.

Harry's head is throbbing.

He's not sure why. The last he remembers is leaving Y/N's house to go for his shift at the station.

They were meeting for lunch; he's sure she wouldn't let him drink any alcohol on the job.

Harry slowly opens his eyes and is blinded by the bright light. He sees a photo of the sunset right in front of him, and a tv hung up; if he's not mistaken, he's in a hospital room, primarily due to being in an uncomfortable bed. The oxygen mask over his face is also a dead giveaway he was in an accident.

He looks around, and he sees he is not alone. His angel is sleeping, a tight grip on his right hand; she looks exhausted. Mitch walks in just as Harry was about to wake her. Y/N mumbles and sits up, pulling her hand away from his to rub the sleep away. Harry wants to tell her to stop knowing how much it actually irritates her eyes, especially when she tubs a little harsher than usual.

"Were you able to find tea, Mitch?" Y/N asks, looking over at him.

"Sarah's bringing it over." Mitch's gaze never turns to her staying on Harry; this confuses Y/N and turns back around in her seat to look at a resting Harry but instead finds his eyes on her.

"Harry!" Y/N scoots forward, grasps his hand in hers. "You're awake. Mitch, the nurse, please."

Harry raises his free hand to take off the mask. He wants to speak, but this won't allow him. "No, love. Got to keep it on."

Harry's eyes close, then flutter open. He stares at Y/N, his eyes kind but defiant. He takes the mask off, coughing a bit; it makes Y/N feel nauseous, knowing he's not doing so well.

"I think you need to keep it on, Harry." She says, "the nurse needs to see it when she comes in soon."

"Hey, angel," he says in a raspy voice. It sounds like he's in pain when he talks.

"Yes?" She asks.

"I'm sorry for scaring you."

Y/N shrugs, "no big deal. I wasn't even scared."

Harry smiles, showering her his dimples since she last saw him this morning. He begins to laugh but stops when it causes him to cough. Y/N lets him settle down before bending down to gently kiss him.

"Now, let that hold you over, and put the mask pack on."

Harry nods. "Anything for you, my angel."

It's a half-hour before the doctor comes in, and by that time, Harry had fallen back asleep, only just waking up a few minutes before the man walked through the door. Mitch alerted everyone outside he was awake and doing good.

Dr. Vazquez walked white coat open, displaying a purple button-up and a bright yellow tie. It puts a smile on Y/N's face.

"Hello, Mr. Styles. Glad you're awake."

"Me too, Doc. Nice tie."

Dr. Vaquez smiles, looking down at himself, "Thank you, my wife picks out my tie every morning before she heads off to work."

"Lucky man," Harry tells him.

"That I am." Dr. Vazquez replies. "You've got a mild concussion, nothing serious, but you are allowed to sleep while you're here. We've got a good team looking out for you. You've got a few burns, but those will heal nicely if properly cared for. A few deep bruises on your leg and one on your rib cage, no blood clots. It will hurt to walk for a few days."

"Nothing too bad, then," Harry sighs, relaxing in bed.

"I've looked at your charts, and it looks like you will be making a full recovery and should be back on the job in three or four weeks. In the meantime, you will need to stay overnight and keep taking in oxygen. I see the nurse changed your mask. Please don't remove this one." Harry nods. "Any questions?"

Harry shakes his head no, "Not at the moment."

"Alright, I'll be off then. I'll come to see you tomorrow midday, and we'll talk about going home. I hear you have a waiting room full of people dying to see; just be aware that visiting hours end at nine, but if you're kind to Nurse Lucy, she'll be lenient to ten."

"Thank you, Dr. Vazquez." Mitch and Y/N say in unison as the man exits the room.

"That's the quietest I've ever seen you, firebug." Harry teases.

"You hush." She lightly pats his arm.

Mitch laughs, "going to go tell them you're allowed, visitors."

Y/N and Harry sit in silence. He can tell she has something on her mind, a slight frown on her face. He wonders if it's about him if she won't be able to handle dating someone who can be hurt by the job. Harry honestly does not want to lose her.

"I'm going to step out," Y/N tells him, looking down at their joined hands, not wanting to meet his eyes.

"Y/N," Harry sighs.

"You've got lots of people waiting to see you and roughly have an hour to see them all. I'll be close by." She leans down, presses a kiss to his cheek, and walks out before he can reach out to stop her.

She steps out while a few members of his team come in to see him offering her a smile as she passes them. As much as she didn't want to leave him, she needed a moment away, and he needed a moment with his family.

God, Y/N has never felt so scared, and now a minute alone, everything is beginning to set in. She has no idea where the restroom is, and the next thing she knows, she's running into someone, but it seems they recognize her because they say her name, and the next thing she knows, she's crying, sinking to the floor. She feels arms wrap around her.

Shushes in her ear, brushing the ends of her hair. It's calming, but she needs to let all the tears she's been holding in.

"Y/N," she can now recognize the voice as Sarah's, "I'm going to help you stand and sit you in the chair.

Y/N feels herself nod.

She begins taking deep breaths, never letting Sarah pull her hand away. It is the only thing keeping her grounded.

"I got her some water." Y/N hears Frankie whisper handing it to Sarah before taking the seat to the left of her.

"I'm okay," she repeats. "I'm okay."

"Y/N," Sarah begins.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize, sweetie." Frankie brushes her hair back.

"I'm supposed to be strong; I have to be strong to do this to stand by his side," Y/N tells them, beginning to let her emotions out.

"No one is expecting you not to cry."

"Bu-" Sarah interrupts her.

"No. stop. Accidents happen, and so do injuries. It's okay to be scared and hurt."

"I want to be strong for him." She whispers.

"You are. You never left his side; you talked to him. You're crying now because you care."

She wipes her eyes with her sweater sleeves. "I love him, and I was so scared that when I got the call, I'd never get to tell Harry."

"Then you tell him as soon as you walk back into his room."

"Thank you."

"Nothing to thank, I care about you, and I know Harry would be grateful to know you're not alone. You've always got us. Now let's grab something to eat, and we'll come back in an hour once all of them go home."

She chuckles. "Alright."

"Text me where you're sitting. I'll pop in to see Harry, then meet you."

"You don't have to," Y/N tells Frankie because she knows she is just as concerned about her friend.

"Are you kidding me? You're my friend first, always."

Sarah and Y/N walk down to the cafeteria. She knows she isn't okay but is feeling better, finally letting emotion out. It was only a matter of time before she let the dam break; she's just happy it was not in front of Harry.

The girls sit in the cafeteria munching on snacks for well over an hour. Mitch sends them a message letting them know all the crew has left and it's time to say goodbye for the night. Frankie wishes her goodnight downstairs with promises to come to see her tomorrow and bring her a change of clothes.

"Let's walk you back," Sarah tells her, linking their arms together.

"Do you think he'll know?" Sarah takes a good look at her and grimaces. "I'll just say I tripped, and it made me cry." Y/N jokes.

"I don't think he'll believe that."

"Yeah, me either." The girls walk out of the elevator as their laughter dies down.

They settle in silence as they make their way to his room, Sarah holding her hand leading the way. Mitch is in the chair she was in for so many hours before waiting for him to wake up. Mitch hears their footsteps and turns his head, but Harry is frowning, looking out the window at the dark sky.

Y/N doesn't know what to say, but one look at him has her heart filling up with relief; he's okay.

He's fine, and he gets to go home soon, and she gets to love him all she wants.

Harry turns his head as she steps forward. "Angel," he breathes out.

It makes her eyes well up with tears again. "I love you," she just lets it out, as if she's told Harry this every day as if she never went a moment not saying it.

"Oh my angel," Harry begins to cry, feeling overwhelmed and incredibly happy. His angel loves him, and although this isn't a perfect day, the moment is.

Mitch and Sarah sneak out quietly, shutting the door behind them to give them their privacy.

"I love you so much. Please come here." Harry replies, voice shaky.

In the next second, she's moving forward, pulling the chair as close as she can as he grabs her hands, squeezing them tightly. She leans down and presses her lips to his chapped pink lips. They move gently, pouring all their love and fears into the kiss. Telling each other that the worst is over and they are together, and they are fine. Y/N pulls back, knowing she can't kiss him as long as she'd like due to his sensitive lungs.

"Harry, I love you, and I was so scared I'd never get to say it."

"I'm sorry, angel; I never wanted you to get a call like this, at least not before talking about it."

"Me either," She sniffles, no longer able to control her tears, "but it happened, and I'm just happy you're okay."

"I'm okay," he repeats. She smiles, taking one of her hands out of his hold to wipe his tears away; Harry can't help but lean his head into her gentle touch. "I'm okay because my angel is always looking after me.

"Harry."

"It's true. I've never been luckier and safer since you came into my life." She smiles. "But there's something we have to talk about." He continues, and by the tone of his voice, it's going to be serious.

"Are you okay?"

"What? I'm fine. You're the one in a hospital bed." Her tone is defensive.

"There's something wrong. I can see it."

Y/n sighs, taking a deep breath. She takes her hand out of his hold.

Harry is quick to mask his hurt.

"I don't like that you're hurt. I hate that we aren't at home in the kitchen dancing around to your Sunday playlist as I bake you a new treat." She says in a rush.

"Hey, love, relax," he says and gestures for her to move in closer. She does so, allowing him to take hold of her hands with a firm grip this time.

"You're upset because I got hurt?" She nods in reply to his question. It's stupid because, of course, he's going to get hurt; it'd be naive to think he wouldn't in his job.

"It's part of the job." He says simply. It's something he wants her to accept and remember. She thinks back to a month into dating when he told her about his ex-girlfriend and how she couldn't handle the unknown of the job each day he left her. Y/N thought she'd be fine, but she loves him, and losing him would be something she could never recover from.

"I know. It's just not easy to see." Her voice was quiet and defeated.

"What do we do?" Harry asks, and Y/N freezes; she can feel her heart beating in her ears.

What do we do?

"What do you mean?" She can feel her hands begin to shake.

"This can happen again." He gestures to him in the hospital bed.

"I know." She says softly.

"Is this something you can handle or not?" He asks very direct. She knows this might not be the first time he's had the conversation, but she just told him she loved him, and he's questioning her. She's allowed to feel this way, but it doesn't mean she can't handle it.

"Y/N," he begins, "I'm incredibly happy with you. I see you and me together for a long time. You're it for me, but this job is my life."

"I know," she repeats. "I would never ask you to give up your job."

Harry stares at her; heartbreak passes through his eyes. "Are you asking me to give you up?

She shakes her and begs for the tears not to fall, but it's no use. She feels them falling and can't wipe them as Harry has a hold of her hands.

"Harry, I love you." He frowns as if fearing the worst. "I love you, and I'd rather love you every moment I have you than let you go now and never know what could have been."

"Oh, thank god." Harry lets out a deep breath. She giggles. "I'm sorry we couldn't have this conversation earlier; honestly, I feared if I brought it up, you could possibly break up with me, and I selfishly wanted to have you longer."

"Well, I'm not going anywhere, not if it's up to me. Seeing you laid up is hard but knowing I get to be there for you makes up for it. Also helps that I'm a nurse."

"That it does."

Y/n grins at Harry, leaning in to kiss him, short and sweet for now. Each kiss never fails to make her heart race, and due to Harry's heart monitor, she knows it does the same to him. They sit in silence, staring at each other as Harry traces small shapes against Y/N's cheeks, loving the feeling of her in his hand. Especially when she lets out a soft giggle when he hits a sensitive spot.

"Move in with me," Y/N blurts out after a while of silence.

It shocks Harry. "What?"

"Until you're better. That way, I can be your in-home nurse."

"Only until I'm better?" She nods. "So, you'll give me the boot after." Harry teases.

Y/N can feel her cheeks warming up but pushes through, "Only if you're a bad patient."

Harry smiles, dimples on full display for her, always for her. "Okay, I can be good and naughty only when you ask."

"Harry!" She gasps.

He throws his head back, laughing.

"God, I'm so lucky to love you." His words warm her heart, and she promises to tell him every day from now on.

"Now get up here and cuddle me. I got Mitch to cue up Netflix."

"Are you sure?" She stands slipping her shoes off, knowing he won't be taking no for an answer.

"Going to deprive an injured man of what he wants most?"

"Guess not."

"Good."

Y/N crawls on and lays on his side, carefully resting her head on his chest. Harry presses kiss after kiss for his comfort, knowing he will be okay and has his favorite person by his side. She chooses Legally Blonde knowing it's Harry's comfort movie as much as he tries to deny it.

For an unusual start to their Sunday, it ends right; together in bed, a hospital bed but nonetheless a bed, together arms wrapped tight around each other.

Y/N might not have liked that Harry got hurt, but he's okay, and he will recover.

That's all she could ever ask for.

thank you so much for reading!

please send me a message of what you thought or if you'd like to see more firefighter harry

I adore you. take care xx

[thefanficmonster]

Father’s Day with corpse and the reader’s daughter? Like reader and her daughter do some chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast.

Ooooh I'm gonna make this a set of headcanons since it's Father's Day oriented and if I make it a fic it'll probably come out in three months 😅

Still, I hope you enjoy it 💕

Pairing: Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)

Warnings: None

Genre: FLUFF, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Y/D/N - Your Daughter’s Name

- You hadn’t cooked a day in your life before yet this was still your idea

- Well, not really

- Your daughter, Y/D/N was the one who was the first to bring up the idea of surprising Corpse for Father’s Day

- The two of you just didn’t know how to do it

- But eventually, you were the one to come up with the concrete idea: baking

- And boy did it make your daughter happy

- Ok, it’s not like you can’t cook the basic meals like scrambled eggs and mac n’ cheese, but anything more complex than that gets you out of your comfort zone and knowledge zone

- Which is why you were quick to dismiss your plans of making a cake of several layers and several different fillings

- Y/D/N didn’t complain much, she’s a very hyperactive kid and that cake would’ve taken a lot of patience and time to prepare so she probably wouldn’t have been up for it either

- You wanted to settle for a less demanding cake with a shorter recipe or perhaps less ingredients since you weren’t looking forward to walking in the rain to the store to purchase any extra elements

- Unfortunately, the only one that seemed to be right up your alley required five different ingredients you don’t have at home (ones you’ve never even bought before) so you and Y/D/N were pretty stranded on how to make this Father’s Day special for your fiancé who is, surprisingly, still still asleep 

- Mind you, it’s 7AM and you two are quiet as a pair of mice as you navigate the kitchen

- Finally, it was Y/D/N who got the idea

- “Mommy, how about chocolate chip pancakes? They’re my favorite, Corpse’s too!” Your eight-year-old said

- And it was your turn to be happy and relieved, making a mental note to buy her her favorite ice-cream on your way home from work tomorrow

- “Baby, you’re a genius.” You told her, kissing the top of her head

- Establishing a plan, you two soon started working in sync to prepare all the equipment and ingredients

- Luckily, chocolate chip pancakes is something you could make in your sleep so you were practically flying through the recipe and process of making the breakfast dish

- Y/D/N was put in charge of the decoration portion, armed with whipped cream, chocolate syrup and sprinkles 

- She’s also tasked with delivering the plate she made as beautiful as a professional would’ve done

- You’re honestly quite mesmerized with the final product, excited to see the look on your fiancé's face when he sees it too

- And so here you are now

- After hearing the sound of the computer in the recording room which is connected to your shared bedroom boot up, you give Y/D/N the signal and she practically dashes into the kitchen to collect the perfectly warm pancakes and deliver them to Corpse 

- You find him seated at his desk chair, working on something as he usually does

- “Hey Corpse, got a minute?” You say, smirking 

- He hums affirmatively, turning to face the two of you and....

- Oh man is the look on your face worth the mess you still are yet to clean up in your kitchen

- Placing the plate on his desk, Y/D/N throws herself in his arms

- Picking her up and setting her on his lap, he kisses her on top of her head, wrapping one arm around her to ensure she doesn’t fall

- “Happy Father’s Day, Corpse!” She squeals, wrapping her arms around his neck, leaning onto his chest to envelop as much of him as she can in her hug despite being so tiny herself

- Standing in the doorway of the room, you can’t help but giggle

- Which is actually a cover-up up for how emotional you’re getting but it’ll have to do

- Corpse doesn’t let it fly by unnoticed as he outstretches his free arm towards you and motions for you to join the hug

- ��Thank you, sunshine.” His gratitude is directed to both you and Y/D/N equally and it only deepens your emotional state, causing you to almost run into his arms just like your daughter just did

- Corpse can say with a 100000% certainty that he’s no better gift than having you two in his life

- The chocolate chip pancakes are a plus he can’t overlook though, especially not when you make them so delicious

A Message from Vy: HAPPY LATE FATHER’S DAY! 🥰🤗

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[thedelusionreaderbitch]

Kaz Brekker/Platonic! Crows x fem! Reader - Silence

A/n: So I know I haven't been very active lately but hopefully that will change! Also I don't really love this fic it's not very good and I might rewrite it in the future but for now, you guys can enjoy this shit!!!

Warnings: Abuse, sexual abuse, rape, violence, mentions of death, technically mentions of suicide, THIS FIC IS A MASSIVE TRIGGER WARNING!!!!

Summary: They used to be happy. That’s what Jesper says anyways about his sister. When he’s asked where it all went wrong it’s usually responded with an I have no idea. When Kaz comes to confront them in front of the Crows why you came back all bloodied and carrying back a body, they know this isn’t going to end well…

Death clung to you. That's what people muttered in the streets of Ketterdam, 'if the Blackbird is on a strike don't go outside for a week and remember, pray to the saint who wears the most colour.'

Great bedtime stories for children.

Your legend would never end, though it must have begun somewhere. Someone who you decided could witness one of your killings must have made up a story. Started it up and told it in fright to someone and the people not believing a word they say. Before their dead of course. And then it spreads like the plague.

The Blackbird was once a hopeful girl, full of dreams and happiness. She had beautiful feathers of all different kinds of colours, and they sang to the heavens and it was as if she was a child of the saints. Then one day - the bird that brought kindness and sunshine to everyone's lives fell into a trap.

There was a hyena that people all thought was bad news but she thought she could help him become a better person.

The little birdy was wrong.

He hurt the bird of colours so badly that one day he burned her feathers and they became pitch black. The hyena thought that he had won at last and had gotten power over the bird.

It was said that she ran and escaped the terrible beast that day. And because he had changed her to the very soul she wasn't the same anymore, no. She was only used for revenge, and it was said she turned her backs on the saints for not saving her. When the saints did decide to intervene the little bird was shattered and could no longer sing. Her voice reduced to a vengeful whip, it was no longer beautiful but fearsome.

It was said that on that night the Blackbird used her wings on Ketterdam so she could cover the sky in darkness so the stars in the sky, the only things the saints could use to watch over mankind was blindfolded in a merciless fog.

And there the Blackbird was born.

Maybe death clung to you, but not the same way that trauma and the cruelness of the world does.

And that's a fate worse than death.

You remember strike one, you and Jesper were kids - happy kids. And the neighbour's son of was considerably older than both of you offered to babysit the one time your Da, and Ma was out.

Jesper was playing in the back, perhaps practicing shooting so he could impress your Mum but you stayed inside saying something along the lines that you wanted to cook some cookies for Dad.

How you wished you hadn't.

That teenage boy had put his filthy little hands on you. He left you in the kitchen tears running down your face and bile that you had to force back down your throat.

Your mother had found you like that and she instantly knew what had happened and she made everything much more bearable. When you had nightmares you would get up and knock on her door quietly enough for her just to hear and because your Ma was a light sleeper but your Da was not, she would get up and see you alright.

The poor woman never told her husband because you had pleaded with her not to. She always did blame herself and she made sure the boy never came around again but she did thank the saints that he didn't go all the way.

She wasn't sunshine, (she always said that was you!) No, she was the faint moonlight in the distance that helped guide you on your way home.

Then she died.

Strike two, was your mother dying. You remember that day where she went to take the poison out of that child and when she did she sucked it back into herself. In your arms was the last place your Ma took her last breath.

That was the day the world had lost its guide home and it always seemed to be in peril after that.

Strike three came almost immediately after strike two. Your father wouldn't talk to you. You became a ghost in your own house, you understood your father though,

she did die in your arms.

Jesper was the only one that didn't make strike three the last strike where the rope was at its point and snapped. He was your armour against the world, with his funny quirks and quips. He was the older brother you needed in those moments.

But armour slowly breaks over time and your dear brother wasn't getting enough out of life at the farm. So when your Father sent Jesper to Ketterdam you went right with him.

You attended college for a bit but eventually, your armour had finally left you. It broke under the stress of everything in his life that he couldn't keep up with yours.

So you meant him.

He was kind but knew when the world was being too cruel. He was wealthy, but not rich. He was sweet, but not puke up rainbows kind of way. He knew you like the back of his hand and always knew how to comfort you. Jesper had actually meant him once before he got too busy with the Dregs and said maybe he knew you too well.

You yelled at him at the time and said that was absurd! He would never do anything to hurt you!

Strike four was falling under his spell.

Strike five was when he told you terrible things about yourself and you thought he was always right. He could do no wrong in your eyes.

Strike six was when he finally started beating you and you had just expected it at this point.

Strike seven was when you weren't allowed to go to school anymore.

Strike eight was when he wouldn't let you see anyone, not even your brother. But you never questioned it, he was basically a saint to you, why would you? Besides Jesper never seemed to have time for you anyways.

Strike nine was when he cheated on you and told you you had to be better.

Strike ten was when he started raping you.

Then one day he was worse than usual and you grabbed the hot poker from the fire pit, that he had used to beat you before, and you had told him to stay away.

Then you ran.

It was the straw the broke the camel's back, it was the saints giving up on him or maybe it was the saints giving up on you.

You didn't care, you were free.

You made one promise that day, that you would never love again.

You learned quickly what Ketterdam was like even before you had meant him, so perhaps that was why it was so easy to become the Blackbird. The girl who never smiled, the girl who only lived only for revenge. The monster that will wipe your existence off of the earth like it was nothing. The ghost that will haunt you when your sins line up too high.

Eventually, you joined the dregs and you connected with your brother once again and he knew something was wrong the moment he felt your presence. He didn't believe you were the Blackbird, the girl who terrorized the streets of Ketterdam.

But he learned to accept it, they all did except for that blasted Brekker boy.

With your time in the Dregs, you had slowly begun to form something with Kaz but you quickly remembered your promise to yourself and you let him go.

Although you don't like to admit it, the Crows had become your friends - family even. You would do anything to protect them even though it didn't seem like it. You were you though, and that was being afraid to even semi-connect with them. Of course, you were, because you were growing a bit too fond of Kaz Brekker and last time that lead you to a fate worse than death.

So you distanced yourself for a while to recollect your thoughts and if you really wanted to stay with them. Did they ever manipulate you? No. Then you came back and you stayed, maybe you weren't the perfect friend or a very good one at all but the Crows knew you even considering to stay was a blessing all in itself.

They were always so patient with you even Kaz, especially Kaz, and you never gave anything in return to them. Guilt would often cloud your mind when you were near them but they were always so amazing something you could never be.

But one day they came to their breaking point.

Killing people wasn't anything new for them, much less you killing people but coming back with a bloodied body and losing contact with them for weeks was probably not the same as just 'killing.'

Jesper pulls you by your bicep into Kaz's office with the other Crows following behind. You stumble in as Kaz slams the door shut being the last one in the room. They stare at you with beady eyes almost like the ones on the infamous birds around the Slat.

"What the fuck Y/n!" Jesper finally yells. Everyone around doesn't even bother to tell him to lower his voice their faces held the same anger that Jes's did.

Silence drowns you in its ocean keeping you in its waters. A chain is wrapped around your throat as you sink deeper and deeper into its depths. You try and swim away, run like you always had before, but the weight around your neck is too heavy, too dense and it slowly drowns you.

You just shrugged your shoulders. How could you explain all that you went through? Why would you want to?

"We can't just brush this off Y/n, we always do, but you crossed a line," Wylan states calmly but firmly at the same time putting a hand on his boyfriend's shoulder trying to ease the tension in the room.

You laugh, you hadn't even been walking a line at all. No, you had been jumping from rooftop to rooftop as they created a chalk line at how far you could go. Balling your hands into fits you snarl, they have been keeping you back. Maybe it's a good thing but you didn't want to admit it.

What about Kaz? A voice whispers in the back of your head.

Your eyes travel to his form in the back. He's leaning on the wall slightly but also using his cane to make himself look up-right. The darkness in the back compliments his angular features making them stand out as if saying he was above you. And to most people he probably was and he deserved that position.

But it didn't matter to you, he was just Kaz to you. Even if you saw him as someone... Important in your life, nevertheless he didn't matter. He was just another powerful man drawing a line that you couldn't cross as the line became smaller and smaller till you were trapped against a wall with nowhere to go.

When you first became the Blackbird, you climbed up that wall, you knew what was going to happen next. And you would never let anyone do that to you again.

"If you think I crossed the 'line' then your wrong." Your voice started out light-hearted (never does a fake smile crawl on your face though) but slowly became menacing and terrifying.

You spin of your heels turning to Jesper. "You've kept me in a cage giving me freedom but always locking me back up in the night."

You turn to Wylan and you mock his voice from earlier. "It was only a matter of time before I would break out." Your eyes lock onto Kaz's and your voice softens while you look at him.

"You knew it was going to happen sooner rather than later. A bird needs to stretch its wings somehow."

"That doesn't mean you get to cut off communication with us for weeks than bringing in a body all bloodied. What you said before doesn't even explain why you did that Y/n," Inej says quietly.

You growl and the people closest to you jump back a little.

"Oh, what are you going to do, kick me out? Half of your businesses wouldn't have even succeeded without me!"

Jesper balls his hands into fists. "Gee for fuck's sake Y/n would just tell us!"

"HE'S THE REASON I'M A MONSTER!"

Your shout makes everyone freeze in their place and there it is again. The overbearing silence that takes over everything with its darkness. Running threw out the room, swirling around you and making it impossible for you to even hear anything other than your own terrible thoughts of madness.

But one voice isn't in your head of that hyena howling at you no, it's real and you can hear it among the darkness. You close your eyes listening in and hearing something other than darkness.

"Y/n." Your eyes snap open and you meet Kaz's eyes and you feel something dangerously close to relief.

"Everyone else out."

The Crows file out of the room one by one following Kaz's order. Everyone leaves but Jesper hesitates at the door and you see your broken armour trying to come back to you again and although it's harsh he wasn't there when he should have been. You understood that he had other problems he needed to sort out but you were his little sister.

You were supposed to stick up for each other.

"Out." Your voice would sound cold to anyone else but to Jesper, it sounds tired and unhappy. Lonely also however it has a hit of love and revenge as well.

The taller brother just sighs though and close's the door.

Kaz's eyes meet yours and your hands start to fidget with the cuffs of your bloodied shirt.

He doesn't say anything, he just stares at you. Willing you to spill information with just a glance. Any God would fall prey to those eyes and they would disclose all their knowledge while also thanking him in the end.

Kaz Brekker had something more powerful than Godly power over you.

So you couldn't help but tell him the real more dark story behind the Blackbird, he had already told you his so maybe, just maybe you could trust him.

"Do you know the Story of the Blackbird?" Your voice rings out against the muteness of the room fighting against it for once in your miserable life.

Kaz nods his head showing you that he knew. Of course, he knew it, was Brekker he probably knows every single version by heart.

"And I assume you know it's about me?"

Rolling his eyes but nodding once again.

You hesitate, knowing that after this you couldn't go back. That these next few words could change everything and why are you even telling this to the bastard of the barrel?

Because you love him.

It's simple and you promised yourself you would never love again but possibly that promise wasn't real because perhaps you never really loved that hyena. Some form of peace has definitely come from killing him, but maybe there's more to moving on from trauma than just revenge.

So with those thoughts in mind, the words tumble out of your mouth and you wouldn't be able to stop them even if you tried.

"Around the time where Jesper was just starting in the Dregs I had gotten a boyfriend. He was... Well, he was the perfect boyfriend but looking back he was too perfect. Basically fake, he was a manipulator and he knew me like the back of his hand. He knew where to press and I was under the impression that he could do nothing wrong." You pause to take a breath but you don't look up from your spot on the floor.

"It started with the small things like little insults thrown my way, but then it grew into bigger things like calling me a slut and what not. I wasn't even surprised when he started beating me."

Your eyes slowly come off the floor and they travel up Kaz's body but never meeting his eyes. You didn't want to see the disappointment that would be held in those eyes. That was inevitable.

"Then every day it started to get worse till he-" You cut yourself off and your legs wobble underneath you and as you collapsed Kaz jetted out and caught you before you could fall.

Tears were running down your face as you gripped Kaz's shirt as he picked you up bridal style and carried you over to the bed. He place's you down and slides in beside you yet there was a good distance between the two of you. But it still gave you comfort and for the first time in a while, you didn't question why it did, you just went with it already knowing the reason why.

You loved him it was as simple as that.

"Then he-" You choked on a sob again and you bring your knees to your chest.

"You don't have to say it." He says gently nothing like what that hyena used to do to you.

"Noah used to rape me." The words come out in a blur and the tight feeling in your chest slowly falls apart and for the first time in a while, you truly feel like a Blackbird - free. Stuttering to breathe in a realization comes to your mind; Noah that monster will never hurt you ever again.

"Oh, my Saints! He's dead!" You cover your mouth with your hand and you lean back onto the headboard tears of happiness smear down your face. You don't laugh though but you feel even clearer than before. You could get used to this feeling.

Slowly you look over to Kaz and you realize the two of you were broken souls beyond repair and maybe just maybe that's what you needed. Perhaps that's what you both need, each other.

"Thank you." You whisper and the ends of Kaz's mouth curl's up a bit into what looks like is almost a smile but not quite. You would get there too one day.

===========TIME SKIP 4 Months======================

You jump from the rooftop gliding through the air and landing on the window sill of Kaz's office. You tilt your head to the side affectionately as you see The Crows getting ready for a heist only they're really just fooling around. Everyone but Kaz of course, he's in his desk chair drawing out some maps.

And they tell you you overwork! Hypocrites.

You open the window silently and you slip into the room unnoticed. You tiptoe over to Kaz's desk and you leap on top.

Kaz raises his eyebrow at you and you just shrug your shoulders, he probably had to stop anyways.

"You know there are other ways to get my attention other than acting like a child?"

"Oh, I know this is just more effective." You playfully respond.

Before Kaz could continue with the banter Jesper interject's just realizing you were here grabbing everyone's attention and placing it on you. Still not a fan of that.

"How the hell did you get from that rooftop to that window!" Jesper points outside in a slightly worried, big brother voice.

So you look him dead in the eyes and say; "I flew."

Jesper laughs along with the rest of The Crows but they stop at your deadpan look on your face.

"You didn't really?!"

"No, I didn't." You roll your eyes, "I didn't even think you knew that I did that."

Jesper comes over and wraps an arm around your shoulders and you immediately tense up.

"I do know some tricks! I am your older brother after all." His tone does get a few octaves of sombre at the end remembering the memories of how he didn't protect you before. But he's here now so you guess that's all matter's now.

You scoot off the desk out of his arm range but you do send him a sorry glance. The memories were just too much to handle sometimes. He just sends me a tiny knowing smile and nods and walk's off quietly (for the first time in his life) over to Wylan.

You watch everyone interact and it almost brings a smile to your face but something is missing and you wonder what it is.

Your question is quickly answered though as Kaz stands up beside you. His ungloved hand slowly garb's onto yours's and slowly you intertwine your fingers together.

"You really are the leader of a bunch of idiots." You say as Nina dares your brother to down a whole bucket paint.

"Yes, that's what it seems."

"But we love them." And for the first time in a while, you smile and it's not full-blown, it's tiny yet it has the whole galaxy in there.

"Yes, Yes I do." But Kaz isn't looking at The Crows he's looking at you.

Words 3517

-thedelusionreaderbitch

Shadow and bone taglist: @kaqua @rika90 @thefandomplace @musical-theatre-obsessed-dumbass @gallysonegoodlung @navs-bhat @sumsebien @dontjudgeabookbythecover

[doopy-n-loopy]

How would yandere mercs react to us trying to escape late at night?

Well not well that's for sure!

Yan!Mercenaries (TF2) × Reader hcs/ imagines

// Yandere themes, violence, fear play, yandere shit

Defense

Demo

You got out of Demo's bed, you had given him more alcohol than usual to keep him asleep. You looked over the heavily snoring figure beside you. The scot had his mouth wide open and a bottle of beer cluched in his palm. You leaned in and blew on his eye to make sure he was asleep, and there was no physical response from him. You then quickly slipped on your clothes and pulled out the small bag you've been hiding behind the nightstand, it was filled with money and other essentials like pepper spray, sunglasses, and a cloak.

You walked out of the room, taking one last look at the scot before tiptoing out of the house, avoiding scattered empty alcohol containers on the ground.

Just as you were about to leave, you heard a voice from behind you

"y/n? What are ye doing?"

He was drunk of course, but when wasn't he? It was like he was sober in his own way. Sober enough to recognize that guilty look on your face. His expression twisted into an angry snarl and he grabbed you by the wrist, dragging you down the stairs into the basement

"you'll stay here till you know how to listen"

He said trying to conceal his anger, but failing to do so

He could also just have a breakdown depending on the type of night it was and guilt you into staying

He will be a lot more strict on you

Heavy

You were looking to escape in the night but heavy lives in an eternal blizzard basically so... That's not a great idea

But lets say you've been preparing for awhile and got everything set up, a snow mobile, warm clothes, and a torch

But the moment you get to the shed, you find that your snow mobile is broken

Heavy then appears out of a corner of darkness with an upset expression

It's silent for a moment, until he speaks

"After all Heavy has done for you? Why?"

You felt guilt building up into your throat as you tried to search for an excuse. Unable to find one. He isn't a very restricting yandere, in fact, he's much tamer than most, he's given you basically all he has and to do this is like a slap in the face.

"Heavy will forgive you, if you just come back" he said while smiling

You were then gently pushed back out into the cold in the direction of his house, where you'd be staying once more

If he was in a bad mood, he'd be a little more rough

He also will place more restrictions on you but it's not like you'd notice considering it's not much

Engineer

You were about to leave in your car at night, when you tried turning it on, it wouldn't start. Engie then walks in front of your car and waves at you for you to come out, which after hesitating, you comply.

He walks over to you and hugs you, which confuses you. He tells you it's alright and that you don't have to go

"I'm sorry but, I want to leave" you stutter out

He panics internally and grips your shoulder, looking you in your eye

"do you know what could happen to you out there? Rapists! Murderers! The world ain't sugar n' honey, darlin"

"but-" you respond, suddenly cut off by him

"but you're safe here with me. I'll always protect you"

He hugs you once again, sucked into that warm embrace, you calm down and walk back with him

You were restricted from certain things from then on

Offense

Scout

You got into a fight with him earlier and in the middle of the night, you decided it was time to leave.

You packed a bag of clothes, some water, money, and other essentials

As you got your keys, you were met with a sleepy eyed scout who had bedhead

"Y/N....? The hell are ya doin?"

It takes a second for scout to process what's going on. You're grabbing your keys, you're fully dressed, and you had a suitcase with you

"Jeremy. I'm leaving*

You said sternly. You could see in his eyes that his heart shattered into a million pieces

"Wai- what no! No no no no! Please y/n you gotta stay please!"

He begged, grabbing onto your coat as you began to walk out. Tears formed on his face but you ignored it

"I can't put up with this anymore"

You said, voice cracking from the pain in your heart. Scout was sobbing now, he kneeled in front of you to stop you

"I'm so sorry I'm so sorry! I'll change I swear I'll become better! You want to go to eat out more? I got the money! I'll treat you nicely!"

You didn't believe a word he said, but with the way he was talking, it had to be true.

"Please I love you so much and it would kill me to lose you... Literally... You're my world to me, baby"

You bit your quivering lip as you looked down at him like he was a sad puppy. You sniffled and dropped your bags, huffing in defeat

".. I'm sorry. I'm just tired"

Scout was overjoyed to hear this. That night he clung to you

Scout didn't really become more strict, but he did become more loving to avoid that again.

Pyro

This one is scary, scarier than support classes even

You were almost out the door when they spotted you. They gave you an inquisitive look. You both shared a minute of uncomfortable silence before you bolted out the door. Pyro was unprepared for this, giving you some time to create distance between you two.

But Pyro was quick to get ready and they were out the door in no time with their flamethrower, ready to burn down acres of forests in order to catch you

You could hear pyro approaching, knowing that once you reach your car at the end of the base, you'll be safe and free.

While you were running, it seemed like their footsteps had been fading ever since they've gotten louder. Until you couldn't hear it anymore. You didn't pay any mind to this since your objective was just getting ti your car

When you arrived at the boarders of their territory when you stopped in your tracks

Pyro was leaning over their axe by the car, looking smug as ever. You looked towards your car and gasped.

Pyro had shredded the tires and broke open every window so you couldn't escape. You stood there as pyro approached you and swept you up in their arms, snuggling their mask into your neck the entire way home while you couldn't help but softly sob

Soldier

Soldier would lose his shit

He's already super strict, forces you to get up at 5 am every morning and run laps like you're in the military, makes you eat either MRE packets or home cooked food and you better hope it's an MRE pack because he cannot cook

So when he sees you at your car late at night, he screams at the top of his lungs enough to scare you into shock

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING, MAGGOT? GET BACK HERE THIS INSTANT!"

I could see this going one of two ways, either complying or he has to chase you down (which he will)

If he has to chase you down, he won't be happy about it, and become even more strict than before (which I don't think is possible but it's soldier)

Support

Sniper

You... What?

How did you even get the idea that you could escape?

You live in his fucking van, you won't have a car other than his van

But lets say you saw the chance for escape, and tried to take it. You either got shut down the moment you got out of bed or you were lucky enough to get far away from the van

"get your bloody ass back to bed" is something he'd say if he shut you down the moment you stood up

But this man is a sniper, he can scope you out easily, and he won't hesitate to use a tranq on you

After that, you're back in the chains

Spy

Scary

Did you really think you could?

He knew you were gonna escape before you even escaped

He'd make very subtle remarks about it and remind you of what he could do

"Do you remember about the undercover mission in Spain back when I was working for the government that I told you about? When I was able to find the traitor using three clues. Even after all his records were erased"

Subtle shit like that to remind you who's in control

But lets say you didn't take the hint, and you decided to try and escape anyways

He'd catch you in the living room trying to escape, and send you back to bed

Or, you'd get lucky and be able to run away, meaning he'd be on a job

Trust me, he will find you within 48 hours, 24 if you aren't moving that much

He's very manipulative so he'd try to make you feel bad about it.

Much more strict afterwards

Medic

I have a feeling he'd already knowz but not to the extent that spy does

He notices your behavior, and how you're starting to become a bit more.. energetic?

Anyways, like spy, he'll warn you subtly

"You seem to always find yourself injured in any way. And like they say, a medic can track an injured person like a gps system, ja?"

If you decide to escape, he'll have some fun with you definitely. He'll late you run far enough to think that you're finally free, before he catches you and brings you back. He's sadistic.

He'll laugh at your face and degrade and humiliate you, making you regret ever trying

After that, he's much more strict, and demanding from you

Bonus cause I wanted to: Pauling

Pauling like spy, can track people very easily

I wouldn't even be surprised if she convinced medic to help put a tracker in you

Well, she'd be at work checking your location every hour. And the moment she finds out that you're not in the house but at a motel, she's pissed.

She has to quickly finish up work before taking her time to go catch you, and trust me, if Pauling takes time off work for something it's important

Once she finds you, she tells you to come out, trying to keep it civil. When you don't, she ends up busting through the door and taking you herself.

On the way home, she complains about how you worried her and made her miss some work like a parent going to pick up their sick kid from school

She eventually cools off after she gets you home, but she is definitely more strict

Gify was acting up so I couldn't download any more gifs 😭

Anyways feel free to request again!

[study-coffee-chicago]

Drunk Face (A Halstead brothers + Halstead sister! Imagine)

"Bye Y/N," Jay started as he grabbed his last duffle bag from beside the kitchen table. "Make good choices. Don't do anything stupid. Will's on shift tonight, but best believe I will find service if I get a call from him saying you got brought into Med or from a fellow cop saying that you got picked up."

"Jay, relax. I'll be fine. This isn't my first weekend staying home alone by myself," you said.

"Yes, but it's the first time you'll be home alone for the weekend when you're 21. That's what I worry about."

"Who says I didn't drink when I was home alone before I was 21?"

"Excuse me?" Jay asked, setting his duffle back down on the floor.

"I'm kidding. I wouldn't try that with you as my brother. If it was just Will, maybe."

"Nice to know I'm the stricter one."

"Jay, babe," Hailey asked as she walked back into the apartment, "you ready?"

"Yeah, just telling Y/N to make good choices," he replied as he picked up his bag once more.

"No, he just doesn't trust me, that's what this is, Hailey," you said.

"Jay, be nice to Y/N. She's a good kid. She'll be fine," Hailey said and brushed her arm up against Jay.

"She's 21."

"Pretty sure she only drinks seltzers. It's hard to get drunk super fast off of those unless you shotgun them."

"What's that?"

"Nothing!" they both exclaimed.

"Okay, okay. I'll just google it." Jay opened the door and let Hailey out first and then followed her out. "Have fun! Use protection!" you yelled before you closed the door.

"My God," Jay laughed. "You've been spending way too much time with Adam."

"Leave! Make smart choices!" Then, you closed the door behind them for a weekend by yourself.

A few hours later you got home from the liquor store with your premade mango Jose Cuervo margarita. First, you grabbed a lemon-y kind of beer from the mini-fridge where Jay kept all the alcohol. You drank that with your dinner. Then, you turned on your favorite tv show and poured yourself a glass of that mango margarita.

***

God, you didn't even feel that drunk. You had drank a can of that beer and two and a half glasses of that mango margarita...which was about 1/2-2/3 of the bottle...and it was a big bottle.

You walked upstairs to go to the bathroom. You were a little buzzed, but not as bad as one time when you drank a margarita and three white claws. And, you drank those fast and you just fell asleep with a dopey, drunk smile on your face. You were hungover the next day, but you were just tired; you'd never thrown up from drinking before. You just kept your buzz going for a bit.

But, when you sat on the toilet and started going to the bathroom, you felt sweat start to bead on your face. "Aw, shit," you muttered.

You took a deep breath and stood up to wash your hands. As you were standing up, you started to get hot and your stomach started to hurt. The world seemed to spin a bit, too. So, after you washed your hands, you just laid down on the fluffy, light blue rug of the bathroom, breathing in and out slowly and occasionally groaning in pain.

Eventually, you decided to stand up, grab some water, and made your way to your room. Since you were already in your pajamas, you just went right to bed, after all, it was after midnight.

You laid in bed and tried to get the pain in your stomach to stop by changing positions and jamming your knee into your stomach.

Bad plan.

You felt the familiar feeling of a lump rising in your throat. But, you were so tired and buzzed that you hoped this wouldn't happen.

But, then it did, all the alcohol came up and out of your mouth, leaving you with the stale taste of margarita in your mouth and vomit all over your shirt and bedsheets.

God, you thought of just falling asleep right there. But, that was disgusting.

So, you grabbed your phone and made your way to the bathroom. You were still sweating, practically panting at this point while you leaned over the toilet, just trying to keep it down.

This was hell.

This had never happened before...and you had drank the same amount before.

Something was wrong.

Maybe it was the fact you just started a new acne medication a week ago. Yeah, that was probably it. It had to be that, it just had to be.

You heaved and then puked again.

Once you were finished, you grabbed your phone from the bathroom counter. You couldn't call Will. He was on shift and if he had to come, he'd most definitely tell Jay and then he'd never let you stay home alone overnight again.

So, you chose a different number: Kim Burgess.

"C'mon...pick up..." you muttered.

"Hello?"

Shit, that wasn't Kim. It was Adam. Had you called the wrong number? Were they sleeping together? You knew they were basically together, but to find out in this kind of way was kind of weird. Were they--

"Y/N? Hello?" Adam asked again.

"Y/N's calling?" you heard Kim say in the background.

You felt the familiar lump in your throat and puked again.

"Y/N! Are you okay? Are you there?" Adam asked frantically.

"Put it on speaker," you heard Kim say.

"Y/N, you're on speaker. What's going on?"

You wiped your mouth. "I- I drank too much and I'm on a new acne medication and I'm throwing up and I can't call Will because he's working and I don't know what to do," you rushed out before you could puke again. "Can you come over?"

"We'll be right there. Hang tight, kid," Adam said. "Me and Kim are on our way."

"You need us to stay on the phone, Y/N?" Kim asked.

"No, I- I should be fine until you get here."

"Okay, we'll be there soon."

One of the two hung up the phone and you started to feel hot again, but your stomach didn't hurt. And, even though laying on the rug of your bathroom with alcohol-smelling vomit on your shirt wasn't the best idea, you did it anyway because you were so tired.

***

"He's gotta be the stupidest person alive to put his spare key above his door. That's where everyone puts it. Dumbass," Adam said to Kim as they stood outside your apartment door.

"Adam, just open the damn door," Kim told him.

Adam reached the key and unlocked the door. "Alexa, play Drunk Face by Machine Gun Kelly," Adam joked.

"Adam! Not the time!"

Kim started walking around the apartment, trying to find you. "Y/N, where are you? It's Kim and Adam, no one's broken in. It's just us. We're here to help."

"Kim," Adam whispered. He nodded his head towards the bathroom door.

Kim threw herself to the floor and looked through the tiny crack. "She's in there. She's laying down."

Adam immediately went to open the door.

"Shit," he said when he saw you lying there with your eyes closed, vomit all on your shirt.

"Mhm, don't tell Will and Jay," you groaned.

"Oh thank God, she's conscious," Adam said.

"Y/N, can you stand up so we can get you out of these clothes? Maybe take a shower?" Kim suggested.

"Tired," you told her.

"I know, I know you're tired. But we have to get you out of these clothes before you can go to bed," Kim said. You groaned again. "How about Adam goes and grabs you a new shirt and then I help you into the shower. How does that sound?"

"Okay."

"Adam?"

"On it."

When Adam went to your room, he was immediately hit by the smell of vomit. You had planned on washing your sheets once you had cleaned yourself up, but you felt so bad, that you had just left it and figured you'd get to it when you finally got yourself up and out of the bathroom.

He quickly rifled through your dresser and found a t-shirt. Then, he went back upstairs to find the door closed, so he quickly knocked on it.

Kim had helped you take your shirt off and had thrown it in the sink. You were currently standing up, back facing her, as you waited for Adam to come back with your clean t-shirt.

"Babe, I grabbed the shirt. She okay in there?" Adam asked.

"Just about to take a shower," Kim answered. "Hand it to me when I open the door."

Kim opened the door and Adam handed her the shirt and then she handed it to you.

"Am I good to leave here, Y/N? Or do you need help?" Kim asked.

"I'll be fine," you told her. "But please don't tell Jay or Will."

"Y/N, you got drunk and went over your limits everyone does it. It's—"

"Please," you begged.

"Just, take a shower. We'll figure this out later."

"Okay."

Then, Kim left the bathroom and you took a shower.

"She puked on her bed," Adam said.

"She doesn't want us to tell Jay or Will," Kim said at the same time.

"Okay, wait," Adam started, "say yours again."

"She doesn't want us to tell Jay or Will," Kim said.

"Why not? Everyone does it at least once when they first start out drinking."

"I don't know. Maybe she didn't want to disappoint them?"

"Could be. So, do we tell them or not?"

"I mean, she asked us not to, and I don't think we should. She trusts us enough to call us, so I think we shouldn't break that trust."

"I guess you're right. But, we have another problem."

"And what's that?" Kim asked.

"She tossed her cookies on her sheets."

"Shit, okay," Kim sighed.

"Hey, thanks for coming," you said as you walked out of the bathroom five minutes later in clean pajamas. It's not like you had to wash your hair or anything, just your body.

"You're welcome," Kim said. She pulled a chair out from under the kitchen table and sat down. "Honey, Adam saw your sheets when he walked into your room to grab you a shirt. Do you need any help with that?"

"No, I was gonna clean it up and then I puked and I got hot and then I took a shower and—"

"Y/N, it's okay. We know you're exhausted because you just got all sick. So, how about you strip your bed and throw your sheets in the washer and me and Adam will make your bed. How's that sound?"

You nodded. "Thank you guys so much. And, you guys can take the margarita mix if you want. I never wanna taste that stuff again."

"Don't mind if we do."

"Adam!" Kim smacked him on the chest.

"What? Free alcohol."

"God, you're a college kid in a thirty-year-old's body."

"That's right. Now, let's get this college kid to bed."

***

"Ruz, where'd you get this?" Kevin asked when he saw the leftover margarita on Adam's desk that he brought to share with the unit.

"Oh, Y/N gave it to us when me and Kim went over to help her Friday night when she got shitfaced and puked all over," Adam answered casually.

Kim smacked his chest. "Adam!" She glanced over at Jay who was making his way over to them, an angry expression on his face.

"Y/N got shitfaced this weekend?" Jay asked as he crossed his arms over his chest and gave Adam a stern look.

"Well, it wasn't really shitfaced because she was still fully conscious and lucid. She was a bit buzzed, and she puked."

"And you know this how?"

"Jay," Kim started, "she did the right thing. She didn't know what to do, so she called an adult."

"She called both of you?" Jay asked.

"Well, uh, she called me but Adam picked up since we were at my apartment..." Kim trailed off.

"Gotcha," Jay said. "Well, I'm glad you helped her. Thanks for that. But me and Will will definitely be having a conversation with her tonight."

***

"So, how was Wisconsin?" you asked as you, Jay, and Will sat down to eat some paninis you and Jay had cooked up later that night.

"It was great," Jay answered.

"What'd you do?"

"Went on the boat, slept in, jumped off in the lake, Hailey made cinnamon rolls, the usual," Jay answered.

"Do you two remember when you guys had me jump off in the middle of the lake without a life jacket?" you asked.

"Oh, yeah," Will laughed. "We had our asses handed to us by Mom after that."

"We gonna jump off, Will?" Eight-year-old you asked your oldest brother who had just come home from college for summer break.

"Duh," Jay replied. "That's the best part, silly!"

"Yes! That's so much fun!" You grabbed your little life jacket and Jay helped you into the boat because sometimes you'd get scared you'd fall into the water in the space between the boat and the dock.

"When can I drive the boat?" you asked as you sat down next to Jay and Will sat in the captain's chair and started backing the boat out.

"When you're eighteen," Will answered.

"But that's ten years!" you protested. "That's too long!"

"It'll go by fast," Jay promised.

"No, it won't." Jay just laughed at your remark.

Ten minutes later, you were out in the middle of the lake and Will was dropping anchor while Jay set up the ladder.

Once that was all set, Jay jumped off the boat without a life jacket. You followed him, but with a life jacket of course. After a few jumps, you took your life jacket off while you took a sip of your red kool-aid. You didn't have to wear your life jacket unless you were in the water. The boys were currently standing on the boat about to jump off again, but they started whispering amongst the two of them.

"Hey, Y/N," Jay started, "What do you think about jumping off the boat without a life jacket?"

"So, like you Will? Like big kids?" you asked, cocking your head to the side.

"Exactly. Will would be in the water and I'd be up here and you'd just jump to him."

"I dunno. Mom and Dad always told me to wear my life jacket when I jump off. I don't wanna get in trouble."

"You won't."

Will jumped in the water and swam a bit further away than usual so you had room to jump in. "C'mon, Y/N! You've taken swimming lessons, you can do it!" he encouraged.

"I- I dunno, Will. How deep is it?"

"Um," he faltered. "Maybe ten of me?"

There's no way you'd be able to touch that!

"You'll be fine," Jay reassured. "Will will be right there. But, you gotta swim to him."

"He won't catch me? But, what if the water monsters get me and pull me under?"

"There's no water monsters," Jay told you.

But, if the water was as deep as Jay said it was, then how does he know?

"I changed my mind," you said quickly. "I want my life jacket back."

"Y/N, you'll be fine," Jay told you.

"No!" you wailed and reached for your life jacket, but Jay grabbed it and threw it in the water to Will.

"If you want it, you have to get it from Will," he told you."

"No!" your lip started to tremble and tears started to form in your eyes. "You get it!"

"Nope, it's yours. You get it."

"But you threw it!"

"And I'm gonna throw you in!"

You tried to run away, but it was too late. And, where would you go? You were on a boat after all.

"J--" You tried to yell, but you were already flying through the air and into the lake without a life jacket.

You hated the feeling of falling into the water without getting pulled back up immediately because of your life jacket. You had swallowed water, too so that wasn't helpful. You kicked your little legs as hard as you could to get back above the water, and when you did, you coughed and sputtered, trying to get the water out of your mouth and take in some much-needed air.

"Shit, Jay!" you heard Will yell as he quickly swam over to you with your life jacket and grabbed you by the waist. "Why'd you do that?" Then, he turned his attention to you. "It's okay, you're okay. Just breathe. I've got you. I've got you."

He set one hand on your back as you started climbing the ladder and then climbed up after you. Then, he shoved Jay in the water.

"What the hell, man?" Jay exclaimed when he broke the surface.

"Dude, I didn't know you were gonna throw her in! Mom's gonna kill you!"

"No, she's gonna kill us! You just swam there and let it happen!"

"You didn't jump off the boat without a parent there for a long time after that," Jay stated.

"And for good reason! I could've drowned!" you argued.

"Will was there. He would've gotten you."

"That's not the point! And I'm pretty sure that's the same logic Mom used when she took your car keys away from you for the rest of the summer and didn't let Will's girlfriend stay over when she was visiting him."

You ate your food for a bit and then Jay turned to you. "So, Y/N, we need to talk."

You gulped. There's no way Adam and Kim told him what happened! They promised!

"About what?" you asked.

"About you getting drunk on Friday night and calling Kim and Adam because you got sick," Jay explained.

"I don't know what you're--"

"Cut the bullshit. Adam told us in the bullpen today. So, I suggest you explain what happened."

So, you explained because you knew not to argue with Jay when he used that tone.

"Y/N, do you know about proofs on alcohol?" Jay asked.

"No, what are those?"

"It's the amount of alcohol in a drink. For example, seltzers typically have 3-5% alcohol in them, but margaritas like the one you apparently bought that Adam has now, has about 19% alcohol."

You widened your eyes. "So, I can't just go on how many glasses I'm drinking?"

"No way. Why do you think shots come in tiny glasses? Because they have lots of alcohol in a small volume."

"Oh, oops. Sorry."

"Y/N," Will started, "This isn't an oops thing. You could've seriously died from that if you kept drinking." You furrowed your eyebrows. "There's this thing called alcohol poisoning. It's when you drink too much alcohol in a short amount of time, so your body can't filter it in your liver fast enough. And, you just got on a new acne medication, so that's also filtered in your liver. Because of this, your liver's working overtime, which could be why you didn't feel super drunk but still threw up."

"Oh, okay." You knew you sounded dismissive, but you were embarrassed about what you'd done.

"Don't you get that this was dangerous?" Jay asked. "You could've died if you kept going!"

"Jay--"

"No, she needs to know this, Will. If you kept drinking, then you could've gotten seriously sick and had to go to the hospital! That's why bartenders cut people off: so they don't get sick because people can die from alcohol poisoning!"

"I'm sorry, okay! I'm embarrassed because I didn't think I even had that much and I didn't even know what a proof was!"

Jay's eyes softened. "Y/N, we're just trying to protect you. Why do you think we told you all that stuff about not leaving your drink unattended at a bar or watching the bartender make your drink and not just taking it from someone? It's because we're trying to keep you safe, Short Stack."

You nodded. "You're right. I really am sorry. And, you don't have to worry about me drinking a lot until I'm off that medication...or ever really."

Will chuckled. "Yeah, we figured as much."

A/N: I threw a few requests together and this is what I came up with. I wrote this in a day btw. (Also, I did get drunk like this once and I'm pretty sure it was because of the combination of the acne medication and the alcohol. Always drink responsibly and only drink if you're of the legal drinking age.) Anyway, thanks for reading and please reblog/like and comment and tell me what you think! As, always, just tell me if you want to be added to my taglist and I'll add you!

taglist: @theambracer88 @virtualreader @kelelas-life @celyndavies@brookerz122493 @musicismyescape27 @anotherfan07 @thexplosivegirl @dreamingwithlens @xoxmariaxox @onechicago18 @iamasimpingh0e @i-like-sparkly-things @herecomesthewriterwitch

[ghostietea]

Furuba autistic headcanons

With it being April, or autism acceptance month, I wanted to finally drop my list of characters from Fruits Basket that I read as autistic! This is based a lot on my own experience, as well as that of other autistics I know or have seen talk online. I hope some people can get something out of it, feel free to tell me what you think 😊, though please refrain from getting upset that I would dare suggest your fave is autistic.

Hanajima

Before becoming able to better control her powers, she would be constantly overwhelmed by the things she heard to the point that she couldn't even really go out in public. This reads a lot like sensory overload.

Constantly picked on in school because other kids thought she was weird. Eventually reclaimed this weirdness and turned it into a whole persona.

Seems to talk usually in a relatively flat tone.

Had trouble socializing with no friends outside her family until middleschool.

Has a very funny, dry sense of humor that I find very similar to a bunch of autistics I know, including myself.

Hatsuharu

Listen. You have seen the funky little man, you have seen the way he talks, the way he acts around others. He is, and I mean this in the best way, a weirdo. I do not know how you could look at him and see a neurotypical.

Once again, like Hana, Haru is funny in a way that feels very autistic.

Very flat, dry, tone delivery. Sometimes just Says Things that make everyone else go huh??? Suuuuper blunt. Doesn't emote facially a lot of the time.

When this man sees a social norm he doesn't get he WILL NOT follow it. Pierces his ears just because his hair got flak, defends Momiji wearing whatever he wants because sometimes y'know the social rules are just dumb and don't make sense. Especially dress codes.

Sometimes says things not befitting the current tone of the situation.

Represses (masks) a lot of his emotions, leading to outbursts that seem uncharacteristic.

His main childhood trauma revolves around adults branding him as "dumb" and ridiculing him. Haru, however, is super smart and wise!! Just in an offbeat way that not everyone may get.

Machi

Reads as very "flat" emotionally to the point that others would call her boring. Also has a flat vocal delivery.

Relies on specific habits or ways of doing things or else she gets super upset (her hatred of imperfection.

Has trauma surrounding adults completely misconstruing her intentions and thinking she's doing something malicious when she's not.

Generally behaves in a way that's hard for others to understand, one of her formative moments with Yuki was him saying he wanted to "see how the world looks" through her eyes.

Once again, trouble socializing.

Tries super hard to please her parents but in the end they still see her as somehow inherently "defective."

Listen. A lot of this one and the last two are mostly vibes, hard to verbally define. You just have to look at them and trust me.

Tohru

Displays behavior very reminiscent of masking throughout the story, a huge part of her arc is about how she hides a lot of herself and has a very controlled persona. I think it would fit very well if she had other autistic behaviors that she suppresed also it helps explain why she is relatively socially adept, it's learned behavior to make people like her more.

Yes she is very good at saying what others need to hear, but especially early on she is pretty blatantly imitating her mother's words. She only gets better at getting through on a more personal level later on (see her with Rin and Akito v. early series Tohru). She does this by relating her own experiences, a very autistic way of showing empathy that often gets us written off as self centered. The way she relays things her mom said could also be seen as this, and she even worries at a few points that she's being insensitive for going on about things like that.

While emotionally repressed she is hyper empathetic and feels other's emotions so strongly she cries.

Her speech patterns are all imitated from her father and she often copies verbal things from others (see Ritchan-san). Noted in canon that people think her way of speaking is slightly off/not befitting of someone her age. Additionally, her father was polite more sarcastically, while she plays it straight and sometimes takes things very literally or fails to get the message, indicating trouble with reading tone. Has numerous strange verbal tics, including saying parts of her internal monologue out loud without context.

Very expressive with her hands including waving them around and flapping them up and down.

Does have a bit of trouble with accidental insensitivity in social interactions, like how she constantly fixates on her mom and realizes that might bug the Sohma.

Has trouble paying attention in school since it doesn't have much to do with her interests

Her only friend until she was a middle schooler was her mom

Has a pretty unique outlook on things compared to others, people seem to think she's pretty eccentric. There's always a "this girl is nice but in an odd way, she's our weirdo and we love her" vibe.

Sometimes has an "inappropriate" emotional response to situations

Has a lot of trouble with change, similar to Akito. Which oh, look at the time, next hc coming up.

But first, a disclaimer. It is cathartic for me to read Akito this way, but with that reading comes the baggage that she would, mayhaps, be showing a more negative side of things... It doesn't bother me since it's a joint hc with other characters and she does develop at the end but yeah, general villain hc baggage. This is in no way me trying to excuse her being The Worst being autistic doesn't absolve you of being able to do wrong . Also, a lot of these points can and do have other explanations related to her upbringing, but things can be for more than 1 reason. With that said, she really strongly comes off as autistic to me, in a way that's sorta hard to explain. I wrote a lot more for her than the other, both because I felt I needed more to convince people and that this headcanon was more sensitive and I needed to be careful in my explanation. Also hey! She's my special interest within a special interest.

Akito

Shown to have a dislike of summer weather due to heat and brightness, could be due to sensory issues in tandem with sickness things. Also covers her ears when people raise their voice sometimes which is partially her trying to shut down opposition but also 🤔 can read a different way. She'd also avoids louder Juuni like Ritsu and Ayame because she can't handle them.

Wears pretty much the same outfit every single day. Said outfit is also pretty loose fitting.

Always seen sitting in a pretty unconventional way. Evidence:

Of course this is also the isolated in a cult thing and there is a level of her purposefully doing things to intimidate but: doesn't follow a lot of social rules (overly touchy with strangers, legit doesn't get that what she's doing is wrong, ect.). Repeatedly confused when people indicate she should act otherwise without explanation. Has a breakdown when this comes to a head and approximately says that "they" shouldn't expect her to know "common sense" if "they" never explained it to her, that the way that she was was her "common sense."

Often talks in a way uncharacteristic of her age when shown as a child in a more faux mature/pretentious way. Might just be the translation and idk how to explain it but her speech as an adult also seems off from what one would normally use in conversation. Additionally, when she tries to fake being friendly in her intro chapter, it comes of as extremely stiff and unconvincing.

Generally displays behavior that could be thought of as childish as an adult, but a lot of this behavior could also read as autistic (covering ears, emotional deregulation and meltdowns, ignorance of basic social norms, ect.). It's also important to note that she knows that this behavior makes her seem younger and more helpless to the older zodiac and uses it as a manipulation tactic. Has issues regarding people treating her like a child or only hanging out with her because of pity. While she does weaponize it, we can tell that this grates on her, as seen with her finally blowing up on Kureno, which is partially triggered by the maids saying some sorta infantalizing stuff about her. Irl, a lot of autistic adults and teens struggle with being infantalized for our behavior generally or treated as little babies that can do no wrong. Even in fandom, you see people doing stuff like jumping to call autistic adult characters, such as Entrapta from Shera, "minor coded." It is also common for us to have at least one bad experience with someone hanging around us out of pity. This is something that really gave me a similar feeling in Akito's arc. She's not a baby and she can understand and do better if she is given the chance to learn and break from all the freaky cult indoctrination she's been subjected to instead of just being constantly enabled. In the end, a lot of her growth is represented by her showing that she is capable of changing and being independent.

Shows particular difficulty with socialization, often sits by herself spacing out at social events. A lot of her fear is rooted in the fact that she doesn't know how normal relationships work, becoming overly reliant on the curse because she doesn't know how to make friends.

Clings desperately onto the notion of being "special" and in some way superior to others to be worthy and to make up for perceived inherent "flaws." It's the nd gifted kid burnout vibes for me.

Easily bothered by things that don't bother others. Feels emotions very strongly to the point of getting physically ill and has bad emotional regulation.

Relatively good at reading others in an analytical sense (though has more trouble when it comes to seeing how they feel about her since she's wildly delusional) but brings up her observations in a very cold, detached way and hurts people even on the rare occasion she didn't mean to. Has extreme trouble connecting to others and understanding their point of view. This makes her come off as pretty unempathetic even though that might not fully be the case. Also thinks that people like Momiji are trying to look down on her when they try to empathize with her. A lot of why Tohru can get through to her is that she manages to convince Akito that she's not condescending by relating shared traits and experiences. As I said earlier, autistics often empathize by sharing their own experiences with someone, and I know I often have an easier time confiding in other autistics because of a fear of being seen as lesser by those that don't understand me. I think the connection between these charachters and the way that Tohru manages to reach Akito like that while others couldn't makes a lot of sense through an autistic lense!

Additionally, when Akito herself gets around to trying to help others instead of just projecting trauma, she tries to reach out to the old maid by relating back to her own experiences. This however, doesn't work.

Has "cold" emotional reactions sometimes even to things that do make her upset. For example, how sort of calm and detached she acted after her father's death can make her seem uncaring. However, we know that this event did mess her up a lot and she is still (poorly) dealing with a lot of grief from the death of her father years later.

Copies mannerisms from others, the most blatant example is with Ren, who she directly parrots lines from as a child to Yuki.

Partly just her posturing, but gestures a lot with her hands when she talks. Also seen several times clutching her hands in her hair.

Deals extremely poorly with the idea of things changing to the point that it is a driving force of the story.

Does not understand when people tease her.

Ect. Ect. Ect. Listen, I could go on for ages but just trust me, the mean gremlin lady is autistic.

[libraryofnesta]

Tied to Ruin

ao3 link

Summary:

Cassian and Nesta were lovers, partners in crime. They did everything together. That is until tragedy strikes, causing Nesta to run away, far from everything she once knew.

Over five years later, Nesta is living life to as full as it can get. It’s not until an incident occurs that drags her into far more than she bargained for.

Notes:

thanks so much for reading. i'm a huge hoe for exes to lovers, so i have like 20 ideas in my head, and this is one of them. It's multichapter. i'm not sure how long this is gonna be, but definitely over ten chapter. this fic has two timelines. One will show them from when they're kids to teens, and one while they're adults. Both will occur at the same time, so things will start to unravel as you read.btw! velaris is gonna be like a super small town in new york. like no one knows about it.

TW: implied domestic violence, nothing graphic.

Chapter 1: lonely beds, different cities

Words, how little they mean

When you're a little too late

I stood right by the tracks

Your face in a locket

Good girls, hopeful they'll be and long they will wait

-

Sad Beautiful Tragic

Taylor Swift

2016, Small Town Velaris

“Please,” she whispers, voice hoarse. Nesta is practically begging at this point, but she has nothing else to relent to. “We can get out of here.” She swallows hard when he doesn’t reply. “We’re still young Cassian, we can still-”

“Nesta.” He says. It's one word, but it makes her pause. He rarely calls her Nesta. It’s always ‘Nes’ or ‘Sweetheart.’

“I can’t.”

Their lives have changed so drastically over the past few weeks. Nesta’s whole childhood is here. Everything she’s ever known. She’s not sure how much more of it she can handle now.

She’s well aware of the tears streaming down her face. Nesta doesn’t know what she can say to convince him, so she says the one thing that she’s been repeating over and over.

“You can…”

Cassian’s face seems to harden. The look he gives her makes her take a step back. He hasn’t looked at her like that in years. “Go ahead and leave Nesta.”, he says, voice rising. “Go live that picture perfect you always wanted. I won’t stop you.”

“Not everyone wants what you do.”

2021 New York, Manhattan

Something about leaving Valkyrians still makes her feel at odds. She’s not as resistant to the sight of blood anymore, and she’s not sure if she can ride a motorcycle as well as she used to. There are still parts that linger though. She still remembers how to throw a punch. A damn good one too. She still feels uneasy when someone walks in the same direction for too long though. It might be the worst part of it all.

Nesta doesn’t do much for fun.  She doesn’t dance as much as she likes. The amount of books she reads has decreased. Her days consist of work and eating, even though she skips more meals than she should. But she’s free. That’s what really matters, doesn’t it?

The muscles in Nesta’s body ache. She just finished a seven hour shift, and got a promotion that pays much better. Nesta wants to celebrate. She wants to talk to someone. It’s been so long since she’s talked to anyone. The fear of someone finding out about her past is lodged so deep in her head it caused her to isolate. The simple way of putting it is she has no friends.

Coworkers are the only source of non-work related conversation she engages in. It’s always small talk too. Just as Nesta is about to fall asleep, she rubs her eyes and forces herself to stay awake. Getting up from the lumpy couch, Nesta walks to her cabinet, grabbing a random mug and pouring wine into it. Once she gets a better look at the mug, she can’t help but scoff.

It’s ironic. Complaining about being lonely. It’s almost like she chose loneliness. She loves the quiet. When she was younger, all she wanted was alone time. She dreads it now. Nesta gets up after finishing her glass.  She’s a bit drowsy, and is way too tired to walk all the way to her room. Instead Nesta walks back over to her couch. She lies horizontally, staring into the abyss until she eventually falls asleep.

She dreams of seeing him that night. It’s a regular occurrence. It’s lessened over the years, but never fully disappeared. The image of him is blurry. It’s not as precise as it used to be. She hates still thinking of him. It doesn’t stop her from reminiscing a little though.

Her being upset makes sense of course. They’d known each other for over ten years, hating one another at first. Eventually, he began to grow on her. Their bickering had become playful, before they once again became estranged.

“Cassian?”

The figure turns around, and he knocks the wind out of her. His hair is out of it’s usual bun.  He gives her that familiar boyish smile, walking towards her and putting an arm on her.

“Missed me Sweetheart?”, he says, ruffling her hair a bit. Nesta scrunches her nose in response.

“You wish.”

He rolls his eyes. “Yeah yeah whatever.” He talks for a while. Nesta’s barely paying attention. It’s just nice to hear his voice again. He asks her what she’s reading, and she replies the same every time. It’s silent after a while. They’ve talked themselves out. It’s a nice silence though. Her favorite silence.

Cassian stares at her for a few seconds, giving her a soft smile and pushing a loose hair behind her ear.

“Come back,” he whispers.

Her breath stutters. “It’s been five years, Cass,” she mutters, breaking eye contact. Her eyes flicker between the ground and his face, gauging his reaction.

He doesn’t stop looking at her.

“I didn’t want to leave,” said Nesta. There’s a lump in her throat.

He scrubs a hand over his face. “Yet here we are.”

“You know why I left.”

Her eyes feel like they’re beginning to water. “I asked you to come with me. You’re the one who didn’t.”

Cassian looks to the side. He looks impassive, yet also emotionless. “You’re the one who ran away, Nesta.”

“I didn’t run away.”

He scoffs in response. “Keep telling yourself that.” Cassian starts walking away. It’s cloudy and has no solid ground or sky. At that moment she remembers where she really is. Nesta stands there, waiting until he fully fades away. It always feels too real.

The dreams always end like that.

Nesta can barely pry her eyes open when she wakes up. She has the next two weeks off. Her boss, Helion, had insisted she take a week or two off, since the bar was under a small renovation. She checks her phone and it reads 12:03. Jesus, she really had overslept.

In all honesty Nesta had no idea what to do with her free time. Maybe she’ll finally finish that book she started months ago. But in reality Nesta knows all she’ll do is go to a bar and let a stranger fuck her into oblivion until she kicks them out or leaves.

By the time Nesta leaves her house it’s around 3:00.  She goes to the coffee shop next door. She orders a coffee and sits in the corner of the room. Nesta somehow feels like the center of attention. It’s an empty shop, but it feels like all eyes on her. The room feels too cold.

The feeling follows her when she goes to the local bookstore. It’s crowded, but the area is quiet. Nesta browses through the shelves, sticking to the romance section. She holds a few books. It’s not until Nesta drops one, people begin to look at her. It makes a loud thump hitting the floor. Several pairs of eyes turn to her. The cover is of a shirtless man too.

Fuck , she thinks, This is embarrassing. Nesta purses her lips, hand curling into a fist as she puts the book back on it’s shelf.

It’s around 5:00 when she takes the train home. Nesta spent the rest of her day at the park, not wanting to stay at home. It doesn’t feel like home as much as she’d like it to though. Finally, Nesta makes it home.

She’s in an empty parking lot. The area she lives in is pretty small.  Nesta knows basically everyone in her apartment complex. It’s a tiny place. She never talks to anyone, but they do acknowledge each other. Barely anyone has a car either, herself included. So it is a bit weird to see an unrecognizable car. It’s odd, but Nesta thinks nothing of it. It’s probably just someone visiting.

Nesta goes into her apartment, before leaving once more to go to the bar that’s the second closest to her apartment. She’s usually working at this time, flirting with customers and taking them home when her shift ends.

The bar is crowded and loud. Lights are flashing, voices yelling, bodies moving. It’s out of her comfort zone. She’s been doing this for years and is still isn’t used to it. She sits on one of the stools where the drinks are served. A girl approaches her. Nesta never approaches anyone. She can’t see clearly in the light. The girl’s hair is brunette, though her roots are dark. Her brown skin illuminates in the flickering light.

“Hey”, she says “I’m Nora” Nora extends her hand to her. Nesta smirks in response, resting her elbow on the counter grasping her hand with the other.

“I’m Mila,” she says. No matter what she does, Nesta will never use her real name. Nora’s eyebrows raise. Nesta can see her lick tongue move as it pushes on her skin.

“Pretty name.”

They talk for around five minutes. It’s all small talk. They drink while they talk. Most of the things she responds with are lies anyways. Nora grasp’s her arm with her hand. “Wanna get out of here?” she asks. Her words are slurred, and Nesta has to restrain herself from flinching.

Something in her head tells her not to let anyone in her house though. Something is wrong, but she can’t put her mind on it. The idea of letting a stranger in her house sends goosebumps across her arms. Before, she’d never question it twice. Now that she thinks of it, doing this practically screams stranger danger. Especially with her past, this person could be anyone. Nesta slowly probes herself from the girl.

“I’ve gotta go”, she says. “Sorry, but there's something I need to do.” The girl doesn't seem to mind, either too drunk to care, or only looking for a one night stand. She nods, before introducing herself to someone else. Nesta feels her chest lighten, exiting the crowded bar to call an uber.

Whenever it’s quiet, she always reminisces.

2006, Small Town Velaris

Nesta wakes up and finds herself stranded. She has no idea where she is. She’s lying in a bed inside a mostly empty room. There’s only a few pieces of furniture, a stool and a drawer. It’s relatively small.  The last thing she remembers is being in a car with her sisters and parents. She hears voices outside of the room yelling.

“You expect me to leave-”

“Her father is-”

“She’s nine what would she-”

“So what if she’s young!”

“-s innocent so what if-”

She hears a loud smack. The silence after is deafening. The voices are quiet after, whispers. Afterwards, Nesta hears footsteps approaching. She scrunches her eyes shut, trying to pretend to be asleep. Nesta hears the door open and close. A hand lays on her forehead. As the person removes it, a calming voice talks. “Are you awake?” Nesta slowly looks at the person, opening only one eye, then another. She sees a woman with black hair and tan skin. Her cheeks are flushed and she has a small smile on her face.

The woman squats down so she’s the same height as the bed Nesta is laying on. “Hi,” the woman whispers, voice solemn and comforting. “My names Aurora,” she says. Nesta squishes her lips together. She’s confused and feels like crying. Nesta doesn’t cry though. She’s pretty sure her eyes water though, because Aurora strokes her hair and whispers, “It’s okay to cry.”

Nesta gasps and shakes her head. “Mommy says I’m not supposed to cry.” Aurora seems to be shocked silent. The silence makes Nesta become aware of everything that is happening. She slowly sits up. Once her feet are off the bed, Nesta quickly sprints to the door, opening it and running out. She has no idea where she’s going.

Suddenly, Nesta is hit with a hard impact, and falls down on her butt. She looks up and sees two boys. They’re both around the same height. They have the same dark hair too, except one is longer than the other. Nesta gets up and brushes off the dust on her leggings.

She notices it then. The leggings. She’s never worn pants before.

It’s also when she notices the juice smeared across one of the boy's shirts. It’s the long haired one’s. He drops the red cup to the ground and makes an angry noise. “That was my favorite shirt.”

Nesta feels sheepish as she whispers a quiet, “Sorry.”

The one with longer hair whispers to the other boy, obviously meaning for her to hear too. “She’s probably not even double digits.” The other boy is quiet, looking at the ground. He seems nervous and shy.

Nesta feels a sense of outrage course through her. She pouts, crossing her arms. “I’m almost ten. I’m nine and a half” The boy crosses his arms too.

“Well I’m ten and a half,” he says.

“Cassian,” Aurora scolds. “Play nice.” She puts a hand on Nesta’s shoulder and bends down. “I need to talk to…” She doesn’t continue.

Nesta turns towards her, and realizes she needs her name. “Nesta,” she says.

Aurora smiles, “That’s a wonderful name.”

Cassian still seems angry. “I think it’s stupid.” Aurora sighs and gets up. “Azriel”, she says to the other boy. He hadn’t talked the whole time, Nesta almost forgot he was there. “Make sure he stays out of trouble. And Cassian, please change your shirt.” The two (stupid) boys walk away. Once they’re from a far enough distance, Aurora looks back down at her. “I have to talk to you about something.”

2021 New York, Manhattan

Nesta walks into her apartment tired and half asleep. Once inside her apartment, she changes into more comfortable clothes, sweatpants and a grey t-shirt.

Nesta’s about to go to bed, until she hears the sound of glass shattering and liquid spilling. She freezes, thinking about the mug of wine she left out.  

No.

Nesta scrambles towards the kitchen and grabs a flashlight from a cabinet, flashing the light to the ground. The mug is shattered to pieces, and she can still see little droplets of wine. The words aren’t visible anymore, letters broken and unreadable.

There’s no way it could’ve fallen on its own. It was in the middle of her counter. Unless...

Suddenly it all makes sense. The unrecognizable car in the parking lot. The uneasy feeling in her stomach. The constant nagging in her head, telling her that something is wrong.

She thinks about calling the police but goes against it. Years in a fucking biker gang taught her better then to trust those scumbags.

She always kept a gun in her house. Just in case. She really hates how no matter what she does. she’ll always be connected to this.

The person inside her apartment most definitely knows where she is. Nesta grabs a broom, sweeping the glass shards into an empty bag. She can fix it later. Tying it up, Nesta leaves it on her counter.

There's a wall blocking the entrance to her bathroom. She walks towards it, opening and closing the door so it seems she went inside. Grabbing her gun from the small drawer, Nesta lays her back against the wall, barely peeking out the wall, but just enough so she can see them as they crawl out from behind her couch.

The figure moves stealthily, back turned towards her. If she weren’t directly staring at it, there would be no way of knowing it was there. The moves look familiar, but she can’t put her mind on it. The moonlight shines on them so she can see the most obvious features. It’s not until the floor creaks the figure turns towards her direction. Nesta turns back to face her bathroom door, hands drawn to tight fists. There’s no way they hadn’t seen her. She moved too slow. Nesta peeks her head out to look again.

It’s not until she sees a familiar pair of scarred hands in the moonlight, it all comes together.

“Azriel Night?”

In dreams

I meet you in warm conversation

We both wake

In lonely beds

In different cities

And time

Is taking its sweet time erasing you

And you've got your demons

And darlin' they all look like me

PSA!! go to ask’s to be added to tag list