#I haven't included every book I know about
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nexus-nebulae · 5 months ago
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oh my god. that one "oc" we wrote who had DID that we came up with before our syscovery. that was not an oc. oh my god cody and blake why did you take five years to make yourselves known to us-
#AND WHY DID YOU GET FRONT TRIGGERED BY A RANT REVIEW OF A MOVIE BASED ON A PSEUDO-ROMCOM BOOK???#question not necessarily directed at them but the structure of our system as a whole#we've been doing a lot of discovering of headmates who were FOR SURE around before our proper syscovery#most of whom we. conceptualized as paracosm characters i guess to cope?? and mask without knowing??#which is probably why our paracosm is inseparable from our system they are one and the same#but like. i mean we found the whole valley full of elder scrolls introjects (there were 11 of them. at once)#who at least with Aerina and Serana they both were around when we were 14 at the very least#bc aerina holds a shocking amount of memories of high school that we thought we'd just Lost Forever#like. she actually remembers what our classrooms looked like#we know that the Sides (like. of the sanders variety) that we made for ourselves. like our own Sides#most of them became true headmates but we're not sure about the rest... but they're probably here#Cecil and Cherry (intrusive thoughts and creativity) were some of our very first known members#cecil was the first actually. but we know he wasn't the first to form bc Sheo hiding his presence ANNOUNCED cecil to ruby the host from then#and like. we created our own versions of sides for every one that was in the actual series#but then There Were More. like 6 or 7 who wouldn't ever have been included in the series#and we were like 'we dunno why they're here BUT they're supposed to be OUR sides so of course there's differences!' and then.#and one of those was Aura who was our side that represented autism#we also had Ryker (anger issues) Oakley (obsession/hyperfocus) Aiden (adhd) and one that represented faith (like. spiritual and stuff)#don't remember the faith one's name it was something obscure#and seeing as like. 5 years after our syscovery we actually discovered Analise (our Logic side) in the sys#we probably have All Of Them somewhere#so like. cody and blake were from the first character we ever wrote who had DID#similar to our first trans character. writing it as if im someone on the outside when really we were just an egg carton#we didn't write Much of him but we put much work into making him like. not fulfill bad stereotypes#he was still kind of stereotypical but we were 15 and an egg carton#but like. we haven't thought abt him or his story like. Since Then#so. very odd that they both show up here and right now-#cody was supposed to be the host and blake was the only alter we actually came up with before abandoning that story like most we wrote#there were absolutely going to be more but. we never got to that point in the story#mostly bc something we were co-writing with someone else fell apart so we just started All of our projects over from scratch
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tearlessrain · 1 year ago
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please help me- i used to be pretty smart but i’m having so much trouble grasping the concept of diegetic vs non-diegetic bdsm!
gfkjldghfd okay first of all I'm sorry for the confusion, if you're not finding anything on the phrase it's because I made it up and absolutely nobody but me ever uses it, but I haven't found a better way to express what I'm trying to say so I keep using it. but now you've given me an excuse to ramble on about some shit that is only relevant to me and my deeply inefficient way of talking and by god I'm going to take it.
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SO. the way diegetic and non-diegetic are normally used is to talk about music and sound design in movies/tv shows. in case you aren't familiar with that concept, here's a rundown:
diegetic sound is sound that happens within the world of the movie/show and can be acknowledged by the characters, like a song playing on the stereo during a driving scene, or sung on stage in Phantom of the Opera. it's also most other sounds that happen in a movie, like the sounds of traffic in a city scene, or a thunderclap, or a marching band passing by. or one of the three stock horse sounds they use in every movie with a horse in it even though horses don't really vocalize much in real life, but that's beside the point, the horse is supposed to be actually making that noise within the movie's world and the characters can hear it whinnying.
non-diegetic sound is any sound that doesn't exist in the world of the movie/show and can't be perceived by the characters. this includes things like laugh tracks and most soundtrack music. when Duel of Fates plays in Star Wars during the lightsaber fight for dramatic effect, that's non-diegetic. it exists to the audience, but the characters don't know their fight is being backed by sick ass music and, sadly, can't hear it.
the lines can get blurry between the two, you've probably seen the film trope where the clearly non-diegetic music in the title sequence fades out to the same music, now diegetic and playing from the character's car stereo. and then there are things like Phantom of the Opera as mentioned above, where the soundtrack is also part of the plot, but Phantom of the Opera does also have segments of non-diegetic music: the Phantom probably does not have an entire orchestra and some guy with an electric guitar hiding down in his sewer just waiting for someone to break into song, but both of those show up in the songs they sing down there.
now, on to how I apply this to bdsm in fiction.
if I'm referring to diegetic bdsm what I mean is that the bdsm is acknowledged for what it is in-world. the characters themselves are roleplaying whatever scenarios their scenes involve and are operating with knowledge of real life rules/safety practices. if there's cnc depicted, it will be apparent at some point, usually right away, that both characters actually are fully consenting and it's all just a planned scene, and you'll often see on-screen negotiation and aftercare, and elements of the story may involve the kink community wherever the characters are. Love and Leashes is a great example of this, 50 Shades and Bonding are terrible examples of this, but they all feature characters that know they're doing bdsm and are intentional about it.
if I'm talking about non-diegetic bdsm, I'm referring to a story that portrays certain kinks without the direct acknowledgement that the characters are doing bdsm. this would be something like Captive Prince, or Phantom of the Opera again, or the vast majority of bodice ripper type stories where an innocent woman is kidnapped by a pirate king or something and totally doesn't want to be ravished but then it turns out he's so cool and sexy and good at ravishing that she decides she's into it and becomes his pirate consort or whatever it is that happens at the end of those books. the characters don't know they're playing out a cnc or D/s fantasy, and in-universe it's often straight up noncon or dubcon rather than cnc at all. the thing about entirely non-diegetic bdsm is that it's almost always Problematic™ in some way if you're not willing to meet the story where it's at, but as long as you're not judging it by the standards of diegetic bdsm, it's just providing the reader the same thing that a partner in a scene would: the illusion of whatever risk or taboo floats your boat, sometimes to extremes that can't be replicated in real life due to safety, practicality, physics, the law, vampires not being real, etc. it's consensual by default because it's already pretend; the characters are vehicles for the story and not actually people who can be hurt, and the reader chose to pick up the book and is aware that nothing in it is real, so it's all good.
this difference is where people tend to get hung up in the discourse, from what I've observed. which is why I started using this phrasing, because I think it's very crucial to be able to differentiate which one you're talking about if you try to have a conversation with someone about the portrayal of bdsm in media. it would also, frankly, be useful for tagging, because sometimes when you're in the mood for non-diegetic bodice ripper shit you'd call the police over in real life, it can get really annoying to read paragraphs of negotiation and check-ins that break the illusion of the scene and so on, and the opposite can be jarring too.
it's very possible to blur these together the same way Phantom of the Opera blurs its diegetic and non-diegetic music as well. this leaves you even more open to being misunderstood by people reading in bad faith, but it can also be really fun to play with. @not-poignant writes fantastic fanfic, novels, and original serials on ao3 that pull this off really well, if you're okay with some dark shit in your fiction I would highly recommend their work. some of it does get really fucking dark in places though, just like. be advised. read the tags and all that.
but yeah, spontaneous writer plug aside, that's what I mean.
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the-internets-girlfriend · 23 days ago
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Secrets in Doncaster: Part 1 - George Clarke
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George Clarke x Y/N (1800 words)
A soccer Saturday in Doncaster is spent laughing and drinking with friends... and the occasionally minion. However, can a secret go viral?
warnings: alcohol consumption, creating bets, swearing, a grumpy minion.
series | masterlist | previous part | next part
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"And hi, I'm y/n and I also want to go to Brighton because I'm the pirate captain of the Arthur and Chris ship."
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The pub smelt of old beer and cheap crisps, as I sat sandwiched between Becky and George; a pear cider sat in my hand as I nursed the drink whilst listening to Chris explain the rules for todays soccer Saturday.
"And every time that your team scores you get to hand out a drink for someone else to do and every time that team concedes you have to down your drink." Chris explains to the group as I felt eyes to my left giving me a side-eye glance with a smirk.
"Oh shush George. You better not give me any drinks this video." I threaten, turning to face my boyfriend.
A chorus of laughter was heard from the group, as George shoots me a wink in my direction. "Darling, you got so plastered last time off of only three pints and it was hilarious." George tries to defend himself but luckily my best friend Becky has my back.
"Don't worry we'll gang up on the boys today. Girls for the win!"
"I'm taking offence to that. I thought we were going to stick together." Arthur Hill chimes up. He's referring to the last time the group had hung out at our George's' place. Becky and I may have had four too many cocktails made by Flo, and ended up having a drunk deep and meaningful conversation with Arthur.. Well it wasn't much a conversation, rather a large amount of gossip said by us girls as Arthur nodded along; and declaring himself to now be one of the girls.
"You take offence to everything, mate," the other Arthur hollered out as he down the remainder of his drink; raising the empty glass to the group, and silently offering if anyone else needed a drink.
"Ten quid he's gone before we even get to the surprise location." I whisper to George, as he signals his empty glass in return to get a refill.
"Ten quid says he's gone before we get off the train and it's a deal." George replies, stretching his hand out for a handshake. We shake to our deal and he moves his right arm to now stretch behind me, pulling me closer to this side. I raise an eyebrow to the motion and he replies to a shrug.
George and I have been together for a while now; but the only thing we haven't publicly announced it to the fans. We did the classic friends to dating scenario; where we've known each other since he first posted his jokes of TikTok, and I posting my first viral book video about authors I love and would die for on TikTok. Our fans and friends had always spotted something between George and I, but both of us were too scared to admit anything to each other until one movie night at my flat where he kissed me.
We simply hadn't told the fans as we were happy living in our little bubble with only the select group of people; including our family and friends knowing. Although, we both know how smart our fans are and they have began to notice the closeness between us, and are beginning to make twice as many fan edits of us, which is quite sweet and I often show to George when we're lying in his bed together.
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The remainder of our time spent at the so-called-quiet pub, of which didn't remain quiet with our cheers and reaction, was filled with eyes glued to the Tv and watching intense football games; and praying for a nice place to go and not some obscure ghost town.
"Doncaster? Where in the bloody world is that?" I exclaim out to the group, eyebrows raising as Chris and Becky pull out their phones to investigate.
I shifted away from George, leaning over Becky's shoulder to investigate alongside her. The small amount of distance between George and I did not exist for that long as he too moved himself; leaning into my, our bodies pushed flush together as he glanced over my shoulder to view the screen.
I glance over my shoulder, now pressed and stuck between my best friend and my boyfriend, catching George's eye as he looks at me smugly.
The remainder of the group consisted of the two Arthur's still researching about Doncaster, and Isaac leaning his head against the arm of the couch letting out a deep sigh before making a quick one-liner to Chris resulting in the bubbly laughter to explode from the group.
Finally George had leant back into the couch, with me following suit and nestling myself back into his side. Chris reached over for his bag from behind his couch.
And that's when I felt it - a soft pair of lips pressing into the side of my forehead.
In return, my hand quickly shot out, giving a smack to George's thigh. "George! the fans are going to go bonkers over that."
He let out a toothy grin, zero shame and a shrug, "good. Let 'em."
Before I could open my mouth to question my boyfriend, Chris' voice breaks the small silence. However, a thought lingered on my mind; does George want to tell our fans?
Chris is holding a card in on hand, of which displays six tasks, and Chris voice is heard explaining them all; and as the group thinks, Isaacs' voice cuts through.
"We should add a seventh task for George and Y/N... keep their hands off of each other."
George and I both give a shake of our heads, knowing this was not going to happen at all, as we're always drawn to each other.
Arthur Hill begins to agree with Isaac, "yeah maybe your secret from your fans will actually be well kept for once."
"Oh shut up Hill." I reply.
Becky begins to chime into the conversation too, "I think it should be if I can keep my hands off of Y/N." Becky then follows up her joke with pressing a kiss to my cheek.
George only gives a chuckle and a shake of his head before downing the remainder of his pint.
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We all sat on the train heading to Doncaster, as my eyes still regulated to the harsh bright lights in the train cabin. I was sat across from Becky with Chris next to me and the other four boys across the aisle from us.
"We're off on a big adventure with the boys." Becky declared cheerfully, the joke never wearing off as I chuckle at the inside joke. Chris gives the two of us a side eye before turning to the vlog camera with a theatrical eye roll.
Across the aisle, the boys chat about football - getting heated as the cheers for goals continue - but I was only half-listening. Becky, Chris and I, are playing an intense game of Uno from a deck I forced George to bring with the reward of a kiss.
I glance up from the deck for a moment, and see my boyfriend sitting across from me with his eyes closed and an index finger pointed at me. Then slowly, he opens his eyes with a grin, and the remainder of the boys let out an explosion of laughs.
"What?" I asked, suspicious.
"Sorry darling, but, you've got to have a drink." George snickers with mock sympathy.
"I hate you."
"No darling, you do in fact love me."
I roll my eyes, as Chris places a passionfruit martini can in front of me. I let out a groan and the automatic frown on my face shows exactly what I am thinking - I hate passionfruit.
Becky knows about my hatred after one time I yelled at a bartender for giving me the wrong drink once; she leaned in and whispered, "I have a plan."
The plan? For my new brand new Adidas sambas to be used for us to both do a shoey as we switch drinks; I hand her the passionfruit and take her whiteclaw.
"The boys can't one up us yet!" She exclaimed before we do the shoey. The group lets out a chorus of cheers as bystanders turn to look at us.
"And you've got to kiss those lips tonight George." Arthur TV blurts out, forgetting that it will need to be edited out.
"And there's more editing for me." Chris says.
""Oh I'm sorry guys." Arthur quickly says, bring him hand to cover his mouth."
"Don't worry about it mate." George says, not really minding what our fans see anymore.
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We keep drinking, as I loose tally of how much I've already had; it's somewhere between "I could have the confidence to run a half-marathon" and "I really want to make out with my boyfriend." The alcohol was beginning to take affect on the most of us; however, George sat there being effected.
We had shuffled seats a while ago, once we were first told the train was going to be held up and we all had to stand up to move our legs. I was now seated next to George, curled into side with my head resting against his bicep. I was engaged with an intense staring contest with Arthur TV across from me.
Simple rule we made; loser had to finish their drink. Which was a big stake for us both since we're both lightweights.
"Arthur I know you like to win, but not this time!" I mutter, narrowing my eyes.
"Yeah right," Arthur spat back at me.
I was winning the game; I knew it, Arthur eyes with starting to shut.
And then George's hand slid onto my thigh.
A tight squeeze.
Completely unexpected.
"HA! YOU BLINKED!" Arthur yelled out, throwing his hand up into the air as if he was thanking the imaginary crowd.
I groaned and let my face fall against George's chest in defeat, smacking a lazy hand against his stomach. "That was cheating."
"I didn't do anything," George said with fake innocence. I give him a pout and reach over to my full can and downed it in one go, pulling a face of disgust as I felt the bubble go down my throat.
"Oh no," Becky whispered across the aisle, watching me with wide eyes.
I buried my eyes into George's side, as I slurred the words, "this is your fault."
"And yet," he said smugly, nudging my head with his own, "no regrets." George kissed my forehead looking down at me.
"Now if they fans saw that, they would combust." Isaac joked to us both.
We let out a shared chuckle, as I latched my hand to his, intertwining our fingers. I felt three tight squeezes to my hands, as I responded to George with four tight squeezes.
Before anything else can be said, the train began moving again, dragging us closer to Doncaster; and to the events of which may happen there.
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and there's my first post!! I hope you all love it, as much as how much I loved creating it!
I realised I had so many ideas for this story; so have decided to make it a multiparter. However, if you have any requests, please send them through :)
See you next time,
mwah x
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punkshort · 2 months ago
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Swept Away: Season Two
Chapter Two: Kokomo
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Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader
Chapter Summary: The first few days back in Fiji was heaven on earth - until things start to unravel.
Chapter Warnings: language, reader has long-ish hair, fluff, smut (18+ MDNI), alcohol and food consumption, wedding talk, possessiveness, jealousy, mention of OC substance abuse, an air of mystery, perhaps?
WC: 7.4K
Series Masterlist
A/N: inspired by this ask. I should also mention I have some personal stuff going on that I've been struggling with and yesterday things took a nose dive — I haven't been on here as much as usual but I'll try to hop on when I have the ability. Thank you for understanding ❤️
It had only been a couple days at The Parador and Joel had warned you repeatedly the hotel wasn't fully operational yet, to expect some things to not be ready or up to snuff, but so far it felt like literal heaven on earth. Waking up the past few mornings with the warm sea breeze floating in through the open doors of your bedroom, laying next to the man you loved more than anything, your future husband, while exotic birds sang somewhere outside had you on cloud nine.
The first day you arrived, you had wandered around the villa in awe. There were three bedrooms, including the master, and each had its own ensuite bathroom. You realized right away your parents easily could have stayed with you, but you didn't say anything to Joel. Deep down, you appreciated the privacy, and you had a feeling Joel wanted the same. The way your parents acted any time you mentioned Joel or the wedding was really starting to gnaw at you, and resentment was burning brighter than you let on.
Granted, your relationship with your parents hadn't always been great. Growing up in their house had its challenges. You and your mother butt heads a lot and your father had a tendency to work as much as possible, creating a void between you during the most formative years in your life. It was around the time you announced you were moving to Los Angeles for college that you felt your relationship with them crumble even more. They absolutely hated the idea of you living in L.A. — preconceived notions of the city they read online had your mother convinced you would be homeless and your father thinking you would "fall into the wrong crowd". But once you graduated and got a job at a production company, you thought their minds would be put at ease, so you did your best to repair that relationship. As more time passed and the phone calls became shorter and more uncomfortable, you began to wonder if they had hoped you would fail just so you would have to move back home, proving them right.
All of that aside, getting engaged and moving in with Joel should have shown them how happy and successful you were. They should have been happy, too. Yet, they still held back, refusing to get to know Joel better or talk much about your engagement.
It was the only dark cloud over an otherwise amazing time in your life, so you were ultimately glad Joel decided to book them a villa in a different hotel instead of sharing a room. The last thing you wanted was for them to ruin the grand opening of The Parador with their negativity looming around every corner. Both you and Joel worked so hard on the hotel, you deserved to enjoy yourselves.
And enjoy yourselves, you did. It was your third day on the island and even Joel couldn't resist how spectacular it felt to be back in paradise. He looked so relaxed and happy that it was hard to remember you were technically there to work, with some wedding planning scheduled during the quieter parts of your days. But it didn't stop either of you from lounging by the pool or beach whenever you could with your phones and laptops while upbeat music played softly through the speakers surrounding the area. It surprised you at first, to see Joel so relaxed during a workday. It was a far cry from the way he behaved the last time you were in Fiji.
Another thing you certainly didn't recall him doing the last time you were there was having a cocktail or two with lunch. He had grown particularly fond of frozen drinks, something that always made you giggle when you saw him sipping around all the fruit and a fancy umbrella, shoulders shifting slightly in rhythm with the music.
"What?" he asked hazily from his lounge chair when he heard you. His sunglasses were perched on the tip of his nose and his lips were wrapped around the bright pink straw of his piña colada.
"Nothing. I'm just loving this side of you," you grinned. His laptop sat open at the end of his chair but right next to it was a book he had been reading, spread open and face down while he ate. "Can't wait to see more of this relaxed Joel on our honeymoon."
You could tell by the way his cheeks were slightly pink and the glassy look in his eye that he was just a little tipsy when his eyebrow arched at the topic of your honeymoon.
"'Bout that," he said, putting the fancy glass down next to him. "Have you decided where you wanna go?"
You shrugged and shook your head. "Maybe Italy? Or Costa Rica?"
"What 'bout Paris?" he asked before leaning back in his chair with a sigh.
"Maybe," you said, pursing your lips in thought. "Not many opportunities to see you in those swim trunks in Paris, though."
Joel grinned and turned his head to look at you over his sunglasses. "You like me on the beach, huh?"
You giggled, making his smile spread even wider.
"You do seem at home on the beach."
He pushed his sunglasses back up to the bridge of his nose and took another sip from his drink. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw his email program pop up with an alert in the corner of his laptop screen, but he didn't seem to give a shit. The sun felt so nice and it was indescribably peaceful, sitting in your own private garden-slash-patio while the waves crashed lightly against the sandy shore not too far away. The sound drew Joel's attention and he turned his head, watching the foamy crests splash down onto the smooth sand. Then, a thought occurred to him and he frowned.
He remembered a time from your first week on the island, back when he had hired you to pretend to be his fiancée. When you first met Glenn, you made up a story about how Joel proposed to you on the beach in Santa Monica. Later, when he asked if that's what you always wanted, you shrugged it off. I tried to think of the most romantic thing possible and it just popped into my head, you had said. Joel turned back to you and took off his sunglasses.
"Should I have proposed to you on the beach?"
Your head snapped up from your phone in surprise. "What?"
"That story you told Glenn, when we were—"
"No!" you exclaimed, sitting up in your chair. "I love how you proposed to me. Both times!" you added, holding up both hands and making him grin. "You could have proposed to me literally anywhere and I would have said yes. I already told you, Joel," you scooted closer and leaned forward to cup his face with both your hands. "I love you so much, I would marry you anywhere. All the rest of this... stuff—" you jutted your chin towards your phone, where you had been replying to an email from Nadia, "—it's just for fun. It doesn't really matter. This is all that matters."
You pressed your lips lightly to his, feeling him smile before leaning back and dropping your hands to your lap.
"Hopeless romantic," Joel teased, his dark eyes sparkling and playful. You just giggled and shook your head at the familiar accusation. When you picked your phone back up to finish your email, Joel groaned and suddenly jumped up from his chair.
"I fuckin' love this song," he announced before swaying his hips. He began to sing softly to himself as he shuffled around the edge of the pool, and it wasn't until he was further away that you heard the lyrics to Kokomo filtering through the speakers.
"C'mon, pretty mama," Joel called, swiveling around and holding out his arms for you. "Dance with me, baby," he added, smirking while slowly bobbing his shoulders and mouthing the words in your direction. You burst out laughing and shook your head.
"You're drunk!"
"I ain't drunk, I'm fuckin' happy!" Joel exclaimed loudly. His chin tilted towards the clear blue sky and closed his eyes while he continued to move from side to side around the patio. When he stumbled a bit, you laughed and tossed your phone on the table so you could join him.
"Be careful, you're going to trip," you scolded playfully, wrapping your arms around his bare torso and resting your chin on his warm, sun-kissed chest.
"Maybe I should get you another ring and propose on the beach," Joel murmured, gazing down at you. He was still swaying, pulling you with him as he spoke.
"Don't you fucking dare."
He laughed and his hands settled on your hips, tugging you close so you could move in sync with the music.
"Alright, fine," he relented, slowly spinning you both in a circle. "Least let's play this at the wedding."
"Kokomo? You want to dance to Kokomo in front of all your super rich buddies?"
"Yeah, what's wrong with it?" he asked with a little concerned crease between his brows. The earnest look on his face had you melting on the spot.
"Nothing," you said softly. You swiped your thumb over his frown, smoothing it out before stretching onto your tiptoes to kiss the corner of his mouth. "We can dance to Kokomo, I think it's perfect."
His lips captured yours before you could pull away, forcing you to sway back and forth on the balls of your feet with your chest against his. In the background, you could hear the final few lyrics of the song fade out, a new one starting right on its heels. It was a faster tempo, but Joel kept you both moving slow, your hips pressed together while his tongue pushed languidly into your mouth. He tasted sweet, like coconut and pineapple with just the faintest hint of rum.
You made a pleased little sound in the back of your throat when you felt him begin to harden through his swim trunks. Pulling back and grinning when he chased after your lips, you wrapped your arms around the back of his neck and asked, "Getting all hot and bothered, Mr. Miller?"
"Don't know what you're talkin' 'bout," he insisted, lips finding a home on your neck. "You're lookin' a little warm, though," he added, tilting his head and switching to the other side of your throat. Your eyelids fluttered when his teeth grazed your pulse point. "Maybe it's you who's feelin' hot?"
You swallowed tightly before answering.
"It's really hot," you whispered.
"What is?" Joel asked, lips puckering around your skin, leaving a trail of wet kisses in his wake.
"The s-sun," you stammered. Obviously. But both of you were beginning to forget what you were talking about.
Joel hummed and walked you backwards a step or two, his arms wrapped around you tightly, preventing you from tripping.
Or so you thought.
"I got just the thing for that."
"Huh?" you asked hazily with your eyes still closed and your fingers getting tangled in his hair. But before you even had a chance to scream, Joel twisted around, tightened his grip around your waist, and jumped backwards into the pool, pulling you down with him.
The water was heated but it was still a shock to the system. You screeched underwater and kicked away, propelling yourself out of his arms and to the surface for air. You gasped and snapped your eyes open, hair plastered to your face as you whipped back and forth until Joel emerged from the water, laughing and reaching for you again.
"Oh, I don't think so!" you exclaimed, and before he could get his hands on you, you kicked off the wall of the pool, giving yourself the advantage and swimming away.
Your fingers grazed the railing of the steps. You were so close, but then Joel's hand wrapped around your ankle, tugging you back across the water as you screamed and giggled until he had you flipped around, lifting you up so he could wrap his arms and legs around you, immobilizing you completely.
"Where y'goin', baby?" he breathed, "Don't it feel good?"
Panting, you gazed up at him through your wet lashes. He looked so genuinely happy and at ease, it took your breath away. You couldn't stop admiring him; the sparkle in his eye, the dimple in his cheek, his broad shoulders... but the way the sun glittered on his tanned skin made you finally stop struggling. When he felt your muscles relax, his grip loosened.
"What?" he finally asked when you took too long to speak. You smiled and shook your head, then pulled him tighter again.
"How'd I get so lucky?" you whispered softly. He rolled his eyes and shook his head, deflecting the compliment, so instead you circled your arms around his neck and leaned in for a kiss. Under the water, his hands reached down to cup your ass, pulling you snug against his hips while you deepened the kiss with a moan.
Your chest felt light, heart tapping excitedly against your sternum with each touch and kiss. It was impossible to keep the smile from your face. How could you, when you were having the time of your life in paradise with the man who you planned to spend the rest of your life with?
"Speaking of—" Joel said breathlessly when he broke away. He massaged you underwater, fingers greedily stretching so he could grab as much of your ass as possible. Your eyes followed a drop of water that trickled from his hair and down the side of his face and you licked your lips. "Am I 'bout to get lucky, or what?"
"Here?" you questioned, but he just smirked and nodded.
"Why not? No one can see us."
You bit your lip and glanced around, trying not to let his roaming hands and his hot mouth on your neck distract you. He was right - there weren't any other guests in the hotel but even if there had been, the gardens and natural fauna surrounding the patio were too thick to see through.
Joel nipped at your throat, teeth gently pinching your wet skin and you sighed, relaxing into his hold. "O-okay," you whispered.
"Atta girl," Joel chuckled before swinging you around in the pool so your back was pressed against the side. Fortunately, it was the side facing the ocean. There was no concrete lip behind you so as to mimic the water merging with the horizon. It allowed you to comfortably rest your weight on your elbows, which were perched on the smooth tile edge, and lean back so Joel could pull your bikini bottoms off.
Before you met, Joel would never have been caught dead blowing off work in the middle of the day. He practically worked around the clock, his only focus in life being his company and what he could do to become more successful. But now, his focus remained firmly planted on you. Even back home, it didn't matter how busy he was, in the back of his mind he always thought of you, finding comfort in knowing you were somewhere in the building and just a phone call away.
But having you within arms reach in the middle of paradise proved to be harder for him to resist than he thought.
Just as quickly as he shed you of your swimsuit, he was back with one hand pressing flat against your spine, pushing your bodies together while his mouth continued to suck on your neck. Underwater, your legs wrapped around his waist, the movement feeling like quicksand, but you weren't sure if it was the buoyancy or the desire coursing through your veins that had you feeling sluggish.
Joel's hand dropped between you, fingers quickly undoing the tie on his shorts so he could loosen them around his hips. Meanwhile, his mouth found yours again, kissing you with a deep groan when his tongue slipped past your lips.
The pad of his finger caught on your clit, making you whine as the familiar heat bloomed between your legs. Your hips rolled forward, chasing his hand, wordlessly asking for more. A sly smile pulled across his mouth and then he tore himself away, fingers still teasing featherlight strokes along your slit.
"I'll be right back," he said, pushing off the wall.
"Wh- what?" you stammered, eyelids fluttering. Joel took a deep breath then disappeared below the water and before you had a chance to process what was happening, his hands wrapped around your thighs and pulled you onto his mouth.
"Shit!" you cried out when you felt his hot tongue gliding through your lips. He ate at you messily underwater, knowing he would soon have to return for air left him unable to take his time and savor it like he normally would.
A flash of heat seared through you, a lightning bolt from the center of your legs that reached to every nerve ending in your body. Something about feeling weightless and having the ability to relax your muscles entirely while Joel alternated between fucking you with his tongue and sucking on your clit had you shaking in a matter of seconds.
When he tore himself away and crashed through the surface of the water with a frantic gasp for air, you had the audacity to pout. You whined his name and writhed against the side of the pool, causing him to smirk amidst catching his breath.
"What is it, baby?"
"You can't do that. That's teasing," you grumbled. He caught his lower lip between his teeth and grabbed your thighs underwater, spreading them apart roughly before growling, "Did I say I was done?"
He had about half a second to clock the delight in your face before he inhaled deeply and dove back under. His mouth seared against your pussy immediately, tongue probing and licking desperately until he needed more air.
It was a new sensation, being brought to the edge just to be pulled back when he needed to breathe. It had you clawing at his shoulders and murmuring filth in his ear every time he came up to recover, but you couldn't help yourself. Your ears were ringing and your body felt like every nerve ending was frayed whenever he tore his mouth away, but thankfully after being toyed with one too many times, his hand took the place of his mouth when he emerged.
"Fuck, look at you," he groaned, fingers working quickly under the water. Two thrusted inside you, curling and stretching while the heel of his palm massaged your clit. His free arm came to rest on the ledge behind you so his entire body ended up caging you in. When you peeled your eyes open, mouth agape and mind blurry, all you could see was Joel towering over you.
"Need you to come for me," he ground out through clenched teeth. "Need to fuck you, baby, c'mon, lemme see it."
Water splashed lightly near your shoulder from how fast Joel was working his wrist between your legs. It only took a few more slaps of his palm against your clit before your muscles tensed and your eyes rolled back with a low moan. Your hips rocked forward and you gasped as each wave of your climax shuddered through you, all the while crumbling under Joel's intense stare.
"That's it — feels good, huh?" Joel's lips found the underside of your jaw and began sucking lightly at your skin. "Pussy's so tight, squeezin' me so fuckin' good... that's it, you're alright, shh, so pretty like this. So fuckin' pretty—"
His mouth crashed over yours, silencing his ramblings and your moans until you relaxed and he slowly removed his fingers.
"Joel," you whimpered, chest heaving and heart racing. You reached for him, a trembling hand searching for him under the water, needing him just as badly as you needed oxygen in your lungs.
One leg hooked around his waist and a hand cupped the back of his neck. You felt delirious; lost entirely to the feeling only Joel was able to create. Everything about him, you loved. You loved how he knew you so well, in every way imaginable. You loved how he took care of you, protected you, worshiped you. All of those reasons and more told you he was the man you should spend the rest of your life with.
And if that wasn't enough, he somehow always managed to drag the most intense pleasure from you. He knew what you needed without you having to ask, undoing you every single time.
"Sure you're ready?" Joel breathed shakily, but he was already lining himself up, chin tucked into his chest, eyes peering through the water. You nodded and swallowed, fingers tightening around the back of his neck.
You felt him there, swollen tip resting against your opening, and you held your breath. Both of his hands held your hips steady, keeping you in place, and then his eyes flickered up to yours. All you saw reflected back was utter devotion when he pushed inside, each of you gasping in unison. You refused to look away, his dark eyes too magnetic, as his hands pulled you down onto his cock, nice and slow. He held your gaze until your hips sat flushed with his and he released you in favor of cupping your face. His mouth slanted over yours, nipping desperately at your lower lip while you fluttered and pulsed around him.
"How's that, huh?" His hips shifted, stretching you open and reaching the furthest depths of you. Your back arched off the side of the pool, gasping into his mouth.
"Fuck," you whined around the messy kisses Joel was peppering against your lips.
"Feel all of me in there?" He rolled his hips deliberately, touching lightly against a spot that had you grappling feverishly at the slippery curls on the back of his head.
"Fuck," you cursed again, "yeah. More, Joel, please."
"Yeah? Think you can handle it?" he asked, his mouth dropping to your chin, then your jaw. "Think this perfect fuckin' pussy can take it?"
You couldn't answer. All you could do was whimper pathetically, each snap of his hips driving the air straight from your lungs. But he didn't mind, because he was already too lost in the feel of you to demand an answer.
"You got no idea—" Joel grunted, slowing his hips when he felt himself nearing his peak too soon. He shifted his weight, wrapped an arm around the curve of your back under the water, and took a moment to catch his breath. "—you got no idea how fuckin' crazy you make me," he finished, staring deep into your eyes.
Your leg tightened around his waist and you leaned forward, grazing your teeth lightly over his throat when you said, "Crazy enough to fuck me in a pool on a Wednesday afternoon."
Joel growled, the sound vibrating against your lips. "You like this, don't you? You like gettin' me so hard 'n worked up, I can barely think."
You thought you managed to whisper out a yes, but you couldn't be sure because a second later, Joel was pounding into you again. Water splashed up, dotting both your faces and lips with little droplets. One strong arm pinned you roughly to his chest, and the other protected the back of your head from the tile, completely immobilizing you. Your open mouths hovered inches apart, leaving just enough room for your shared grunts and moans to escape, each devastating thrust bringing you both closer to the edge.
"Oh, f-fuck," you stammered, body jolting violently in his grip from the force of his hips slamming into you. His jaw tightened, brow furrowing as he fought back his own climax. You were close, he could feel it. He just needed to give you a little more.
"Don't stop," you begged, and Joel shook his head, stomach tensing with the need to let go. A strangled noise made its way past your lips and you feverishly clutched the sides of his head. "Kiss me," you pleaded.
His mouth crashed against yours, tongue sliding past your lips, and all the while he maintained that same, steady pace underwater. There was a moment where he thought he might not be able to hold back any longer, but then he felt your body go rigid and a broken version of his name tumbled into his mouth. A second later, the sweet feeling of relief flooded his veins as he came, pumping you full of his seed while you both rode out the rest of your highs together.
Joel broke the kiss with a sharp gasp, then buried his face in the crook of your neck so he could catch his breath. Your fingers combed lovingly through his hair and you closed your eyes, basking in the sun and the afterglow of your orgasm with Joel still buried deep between your legs. His arms remained wrapped around you, as well, keeping you so close that your chests bumped together with every shaky breath. After several quiet minutes, Joel whispered your name, his soft way of checking in.
You swallowed, throat hoarse and dry. "Say it," you mumbled drowsily. You felt his lips twitch against your neck.
"I love you."
A slow smile stretched across your face and you sighed.
"I love you, too."
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The drive to Glenn and Mary's mansion brought back so many memories. Nerves, excitement, and anticipation filled you the first time, hoping you would do a good job at selling your fake engagement so Joel would appear relatable to Glenn and therefore make him look like the best choice to purchase the land for the hotel. Then afterwards, uneasiness and pangs of jealousy once you found out that Joel used to carry on an affair with another hotel mogul's wife, Tammy.
This time was different. Now, you were legitimately Joel's fiancée and madly in love. No more secrets, no more feelings of betrayal. You couldn't have been any happier.
"I'm looking forward to seeing them again," you told Joel. He sat next to you in the backseat of the town car, your left hand engulfed by his across the middle seat. His thumb distractedly played with the huge diamond on your ring finger and he smiled.
"Should be nice. Just them, Trevor and Zoe," he recapped.
Zoe. You were so excited to see your old friend, a port in the storm the last time you were on the island. She was young, beautiful, carefree and a former sugarbaby. While you hid that part of your history from everyone — with the exception of Joel's trusted assistant, Liam — Zoe had told you her secret in confidence early on in your trip. As much as you wanted to share with her your own background, you knew how detrimental it would be to Joel, so you kept your mouth shut. Still, Zoe turned out to be an incredible friend. She was there the night Brooks — Glenn and Mary's son —assaulted you in a restaurant bathroom. She took care of you until Joel arrived that night. She also had your back when Tammy and Lynne accused you of being a gold digger during a dinner party towards the end of your trip.
Needless to say, after the trip ended, you remained close friends. You were thrilled to find out she quit being a sugarbaby and found herself a boyfriend... none other than Glenn and Mary's other son, Trevor. Who actually didn't turn out to be that bad, compared to his brother.
"Much better group than last time," you said, squeezing Joel's hand.
He smirked and rolled his eyes, knowing full well you were referring to Tammy and her little sidekick, Lynne.
"Easy," he teased.
Glenn and Mary lived right on the beach in a stunning Mediterranean-style house which was surrounded by exotic plants and meticulously maintained gardens, a home that still took your breath away whenever you saw it.
When your car pulled up, you could see all the lights on inside, and when the chauffeur opened your door and you stepped out, you could hear the soft sounds of music echoing from the backyard.
"They must be on the patio," you said to Joel, looping your hand through his arm and allowing him to lead you to the front door.
"They do love their view," he murmured.
A man you didn't recognize but who appeared to be part of the catering service opened the door for you with the offer of champagne. You each took a flute before heading through the familiar, grandiose foyer. The kitchen and dining areas were silent except for the staff furiously working away. Your gaze drifted to look through the glass that lead out to their gorgeous pool area, spotting four familiar faces smiling and laughing around the outdoor bar. When Zoe turned her head and locked eyes with you through the windows, her face lit up. Yours must have done the same because you immediately dropped Joel's arm and squealed excitedly.
Hurrying outside, you ran to meet Zoe halfway, then threw your arms around each other's necks, swaying back and forth and murmuring compliments in the other's ear while trying to simultaneously not spill your drinks.
"Your hair! It's so long!" you gushed when you pulled away. Your fingers idly slid down her shiny locks with a smile so wide, your cheeks hurt. "And this dress! Oh my god—"
"You should talk! You're practically glowing!" Zoe beamed right back before snatching your right hand to hold it up to the dim garden lighting. "Or is it this massive fucking rock?"
She whispered the last part so none of the others heard. They had come forward to greet Joel while you and Zoe got reacquainted, fortunately buying you an extra minute to come up with some excuse as to why you had two engagement rings.
"Oh, this?" you laughed, stretching your fingers out so you could both admire it. "Joel thought he owed me another one since it's taken us so long to get married."
"Goddamn, Joel. You are one smart man," Glenn bellowed behind you. You swiveled around with a huge grin so you could give Glenn, Mary, and Trevor each a warm hug. When you were about to step away, Mary tsked and held out her hand, so you placed your right palm in hers while they got a good look at your new ring.
"Felt bad that storm set construction back a few weeks," Joel explained, quickly rolling with your story. He curled an arm around your waist when everyone was done admiring your ring, tucking you into his side. "Caused a headache with the wedding planner. Y'know how it is."
"I always told you — happy wife, happy life," Glenn chuckled before waving everyone over to the appetizers, which had just been set out near the bar. "C'mon, dig in. Then I wanna hear all about the soft open."
Joel opened his mouth to reply when a man's familiar sounding drawl rang out behind you.
"Oh, well, what do you know? We just came from there, I can tell you all about it."
Your body reacted before your brain had a chance to figure out what was happening. The hairs on your arms stood up and your heart felt like it was lodged in your throat.
You knew that voice.
"Scott! Didn't think you were comin' in til later!" Glenn called out cheerily. Zoe's hand found your forearm and she gave it a reassuring squeeze. Then, Joel murmured something in your ear but your blood was pumping so fast and loud, you couldn't hear him. Because if Scott was there, that meant...
"Tammy!" Mary sang, raising her arms above her head with a sweet smile. She didn't notice your reaction, neither did Glenn. They were too busy giving them both hugs and murmuring something to them about the weather.
Joel tried to get your attention again but you felt frozen in place. Zoe released your arm, whispered breathe in your ear, then followed Trevor over to greet them next.
"C'mon, let's just get through this," Joel urged, and you blinked before snapping your head to look at him.
"Did you—"
"No."
You exhaled in relief. It was a surprise, Joel didn't know they were coming. Still...
"Get over here, you son of a bitch," Scott laughed, tapping Joel on his shoulder. He let you go and plastered a polite smile across his face before giving him a hug. He hesitated for half a second, then gave Tammy a quick kiss on the cheek. You knew he had to do it. It would have looked weird if he didn't. But it still had your claws coming out, so you tucked your hand behind your back, squeezing your fingers into a tight fist to release some anger.
Tammy's eyes landed on you and she gave you a fake smile, murmured your name, and stiffly leaned forward to kiss you on the cheek. It took everything in your power to move, to press your cheek against hers, to say nice to see you and act like either of you meant it.
You broke apart quickly, each of you avoiding eye contact and retreating back to your partners. Joel wrapped an arm around your waist, his fingers pressed into your hip, wordlessly trying to soothe you, to tell you it was okay. With your cheeks hot, you caught Zoe's eye. She looked just as taken aback as you.
"Did you, uh, say you were at The Parador?" Joel asked. He sounded guarded, like he was bracing for something. He must have already connected the dots and for some reason, you were lagging, because Scott nodded and announced the obvious.
"We were lucky enough to get one of the rooms for the soft open." Scott tossed Joel a grin while lacing his fingers together with his wife's. "Don't worry. We won't be too harsh in our review. Right, honey?" he joked.
Scott looked down at Tammy who batted her lashes and nodded.
"That's right. We know there's bumps to iron out when a new location opens up. We understand the business."
Scott owned his own chain of hotels and was in contention to win the plot of land Joel ended up getting on the island, so they were no stranger to the hospitality industry. But as nice as Scott was, at the end of the day, Joel was a competitor and he won something Scott couldn't have. It had your gut twisting nervously by Joel's side.
"Well, if somethin' doesn't meet your standards, you let me know immediately," Joel responded. You had to give him credit, he was handling the turn of events much better than you were, but something told you he would be expressing his true thoughts on the matter in the car later.
The only saving grace all evening happened when Scott and Tammy chose to sit at the opposite end of the table from you and Joel. It afforded you a chance to get your bearings and breathe.
"I didn't know," Zoe whispered before you could even ask. "I heard they had a layover on their way to Australia, but I didn't think they'd be stopping here."
"It's fine," you mumbled, picking at the fish on your plate. "Maybe they're just saying long enough to see Glenn and Mary."
You were wrong.
By the time your plates were cleared and dessert was being served, the topic of Scott and Tammy's unexpected arrival finally came up.
"Australia? What's taking the two of you there?" Mary asked. Candlelight that decorated the table flickered across her face, making her dark hair shimmer. She was beautiful and always very sweet. Even after your altercation with Brooks, both she and Glenn stood by your side and made the difficult decision to send their son off to rehab on a neighboring island. You were grateful for their kindness and generosity towards you during your last stay, but you had to admit, you were envious of how absolutely clueless she and her husband were about the dynamics at their table. You couldn't be certain about Trevor, but considering Zoe knew all the drama with Tammy, you had to assume the only people at the table who were in the dark were Glenn, Mary and Scott.
"Thought we'd take some time off down uhnda," Scott laughed, "Figured we deserved a little break. Hotels have been doing great but it's cost me a lot of late nights. So, we planned a little trip, just the two of us. But when we realized The Parador was about to have its grand open? Well," he breathed, locking eyes with Joel. "Couldn't miss that, now could we?"
"The boys were beside themselves but I told them when they graduate college, we'll consider taking them somewhere of their choosing," Tammy cooed, swirling her crystal wine glass in her hand. "That is, if their grades reflect the hard work they claim they're putting in."
"You sure you ain't lookin' to expand in Australia?" Glenn asked coyly. Scott gave him a sly smirk and shrugged.
"Who's to say."
Tammy scoffed and playfully swat at his shoulder. "No business, you promised!"
While the men laughed, you and Zoe exchanged glances and focused on your plates. Scott, to your knowledge, never knew Tammy had an affair with Joel all those years ago. So to watch them act so sickeningly sweet and in love irked you both. Especially when Joel confessed to you that Tammy had developed strong feelings for him during their tryst.
"When do your parents get in?" Zoe asked softly, but Mary overheard anyway and perked up.
"Oh! Your parents? That's lovely! They must be coming to help you plan the wedding!"
You nodded, feeling your cheeks warm when the entire table dragged their focus onto you.
"Yes, they arrive late tonight, actually," you responded. "They'll help a bit, but they aren't the type to take vacations, well... ever, really. So it was Joel's idea to get them out here and relax for once."
Joel smiled and his hand found yours underneath the table. He gave you a gentle squeeze, soothing your frayed nerves.
"Well, that's thoughtful. We all oughta go out to dinner before they leave," Glenn suggested. You swallowed tightly and nodded before Zoe swooped in.
"Mary! I forgot to tell you... we went to that new restaurant the other day."
"Ocean Terrace? How was it?"
And just like that, the attention shifted to Zoe and Trevor as they told the table about a horrendous dining experience.
"Dinner's almost over," Joel assured you quietly. You met his gaze, his dark eyes glittering in the dim lighting making your chest tighten with affection. "We'll make up some excuse not to get dinner with 'em again, don't worry."
You let out a shaky breath and nodded. You could do this. Besides, what could Tammy possibly do that hasn't already been done? She was a mood killer at that point and nothing more.
Your shoulders relaxed after your plates were cleared and people began to stand. Scott mentioned something about jet lag and Joel made an exaggerated yawn before making a comment about having an early meeting.
Zoe pulled you in for a hug and murmured in your ear about getting lunch. You told her you wanted to spend some time with your parents the next day, but promised to text her and set something up after. Then you gave Trevor a quick hug, which resulted in an avalanche of farewells and polite pecks on cheeks.
Joel was leading you through the house, back the way you came. Every step made you breathe a little easier until Glenn suddenly jogged up behind you.
"Joel? You got a quick minute?"
Joel's eyes flickered between yours and Glenn's, confusion etching his face before he nodded and let go of your hand.
"I'll meet you in the car."
You didn't think anything of it. Figured it was business related; that maybe Glenn wanted to book a few villas for friends or maybe host an event in one of the ballrooms. You took out your phone after you settled into your seat and opened a text from your mother, letting you know they safely landed and that they were checking into their hotel. You tapped out a quick response, telling her you would call them the next day and advised them to get some rest when Joel slipped into the backseat. His lips were pressed into a thin line and his brows pulled tight. You quickly dropped your phone back into your purse when you sensed the tension rolling off his shoulders.
"What's wrong?"
He didn't answer right away. Instead, his hand found the button for the partition. You could hear the little motor whirring as it slowly closed, giving you privacy from the driver as he drove down the empty streets, back to The Parador.
Even in the dim ambient lighting from the ceiling, you could read Joel's face. He was pissed.
"Joel?" you tried again. His jaw tensed and your eyes dropped to his knee, which was bouncing anxiously as he mulled over whatever Glenn had just said. Then finally, he forced his gaze onto you and your stomach dropped when he said, "Brooks is outta rehab. Been back on the island for a week, and—" he bit the inside of his cheek before huffing in disbelief and shaking his head. "—and he wants to see you. Says he's got somethin' important he wants to say. Glenn thinks he plans to apologize. Make amends or some shit. Part of some program..." he trailed off and pinched the bridge of his nose with a sigh while you remained frozen, unable to tear your eyes away from the cut of Joel's jaw.
"What?" you whispered. Joel heard the tremor in your voice. He quickly turned his focus back onto you, taking your hand in both of his and drawing soothing circles on your knuckles with the pad of his thumb.
"It's fine. He ain't comin' anywhere near you, y'hear me?"
You nodded because it was all you could manage to do. Your throat was too tight to speak. This was all too much—
"I don't care what they say. He's their kid, 'course they're gonna believe him when he says he ain't using," Joel muttered. You cleared your throat and took a breath.
"Well... maybe he is—"
"Ain't up for discussion," Joel said coldly, cutting you off. Goosebumps flashed across your skin at his tone. "If it's that important, he can call or write a letter or some shit. He ain't ever gonna lay a hand on you again."
You nodded and clamped your mouth shut. It wasn't often Joel put his foot down, and considering what happened last time, he had every right to be suspicious and on edge. Besides — you weren't interested in seeing him. Only just morbidly curious.
The rest of the drive was quiet. He kept your hand on his leg, his warm palm pressing comfortingly against yours while you both stared out your respective windows, lost in thought.
Foolishly, you thought it was over; that the universe had thrown you enough curveballs for one night.
When Joel swung the door open to your villa, the room was dark. He stepped inside and began to flick on all the lights, leaving you to close and lock the door behind you. Somewhere in the master bedroom, you heard the curtains closing, but your gaze had fallen to a crisp white envelope under your shoe. You frowned, eyes darting from the envelope to the door, then leaned down to pick it up.
You flipped it over in your hands: it was sealed and not addressed to anybody.
"I'm gonna shower," Joel called from the bathroom.
"Okay," you answered distractedly. You heard the water turn on as you wandered into the kitchen, studying the envelope while trying to remember if Joel had mentioned he was expecting anything.
Curiosity eventually got the best of you and you ripped it open. Inside was just one white piece of common printer paper with four simple words staining the page, yet those four words made your blood run cold and dread settle over you like a blanket of snow:
I know your secret.
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selenitesdawn · 6 months ago
Text
Temperance (1/3)
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pairing: wanda maximoff x female!reader plot: Your best friend Kate convinced you to do charity work in Sokovia with some of your old classmates, including your former bully Vision and his girlfriend Wanda Maximoff, who you inconveniently took too much of a liking in. warnings: 18+ !! minors dni. wanda is with vision... also, suggestive content I guess word count: 1115
Patience is a virtue. Patience is the solution. These have been your only thoughts for days now. From a self-imposed affirmation to a recurring echo in your head, this reminder is all you had to get through the situation at hand. What else could you do? Keep trying to ignore your desire? The craving that has kept you awake for days and nights?
The thing is, you may be able to trick your brain for a while. Convince yourself that the way her nose wrinkles when she grins doesn't do anything to you. That the way her middle and ring finger draw the same patterns over and over again on the pages of her book whenever she is deep in thought, doesn't stir something inside of you. That the muffled moans coming from her and Vision's room at night don't bother you. Your brain has managed to lie to itself for a long time, but you can no longer ignore what Wanda is doing to you. So instead of denying your feelings, you decided that you have to sit through them. Until you can finally leave this place.
You weren't planning on pining after your old classmate's girlfriend, but here you were. Miles away from home, locked up with the constant reminder that you can never be with Wanda the way you want to. Originally, the three months in Sokovia were supposed to fulfill you. You just wanted to take care of the local street dogs with your best friend Kate. Do something good. That was it.
“Come on y/n, you've always had a heart for street animals,” your best friend said to you at the time. Back then she turned up at your door without a warning and told you about this great trip Vision had planned.
“Kate, I barely got anything done last semester. I can't waste another one. Besides, my boss never gives me that long of a vacation.”
You knew Kate wouldn't leave your apartment until you said yes. You could tell by the way her eyes were gleaming. How she slightly bend over the table you were sitting at, her gaze not leaving you for one second. Of course, the whole thing is much easier for Kate. Her mother is filthy rich. Kate can basically do whatever she wants. She could disappear for one year, travel the world with money she didn't earn and wouldn't have to worry about her life back home for one moment. You don't have that luxury.
“Think about it. First of all, you do something that fulfills you. Besides, I know you y/n. You haven't wanted to work in that rancid bakery for months. We'll find something new for you afterwards. Not to mention that volunteering to help street dogs for three months looks great on your CV. Plus: I heard Vision rented a mansion”
Vision. The name alone triggered something in you. Vision is not only the son of the famous billionaire Tony Stark, but also a giant asshole. Before Vision knew you were friends with Kate, he took every opportunity to trigger you in some way. Like standing in front of your locker with his group of followers for no reason, just so you couldn't get to it. The worst thing he ever did was probably when he stole your notebook and read out loud in class what you had written about your former classmate Natasha. Some cheesy and cringe poem you managed to suppress from your memories. From that day on, it wasn't just the whole school that knew you liked women. You also were never able to look Natasha in the eye again. But Vision somehow always managed to come out of it okay. His reputation was disgustingly squeaky clean.
“It's so weird imagining Vision doing something voluntarily that doesn't serve only himself. Are you sure he isn't just joking?,” you had asked back then.
“I think he has really changed since high school. Besides, his girlfriend is originally from Sokovia and I think it was her idea? I don't know for sure. But please, y/n, join me. I'd do anything to spend more than an hour a week with my best friend. And this is a once in a lifetime opportunity! Vision specifically asked if you want to join.”
You've never been able to deny Kate a wish. But also, it's never led you into such a miserable situation before. So this is where you were. In a villa far too grand for it to feel like a prison. Besides Vision, Wanda and Kate, there were two other old classmates; Steve and Bucky. Living together turned out to be easier than you thought, especially considering the fact that Vision was there. But your feelings for Wanda kept causing you problems. Whenever the redhead came near you, you started to stumble over your words. One long look alone could throw you completely off balance. But it was even worse when she smiled at you. When she listened to you and her head slightly tilted at the same time. Or when you were cooking and she suddenly appeared behind you, her hand softly placed around your waist and her head set down on your shoulder.
“What are you blessing us with this evening?,” she inquired with an almost teasing tone in her voice.
Before you were able to even articulate anything, she took her free hand, slid it along your arm and took the wooden spoon out of your hand.
“May I?,” her voice dangerously low, as she already moved the spoon towards her mouth, looking straight at you. You just gulped and managed a small nod as Wanda put the spoon in her mouth, her gaze never leaving you as she sucked it clean. Her green eyes were barely visible as her dilated pupils covered them almost completely. A soft moan escaped from her lips as she handed the spoon back to you.
“You're so good at this y/n,” Wanda groans, her hand which still holds onto your waist making its way to your lower back, smoothly slipping under your loose t-shirt. The cold rings on her fingers on your warm skin immediately sent shivers down your spine. Her pinky slightly slipped under the waistband of your sweatpants before she left you standing alone in the kitchen.
She must do this on purpose. There is no other way.
You thought to yourself. But what was the use? Either you are right and she does it on purpose or you are wrong and project your fantasies onto her. In both cases, it is best to simply stay away from Wanda. Because there is no way you don't end up completely fucked. Right?
: Part 2
538 notes · View notes
bootsukki · 7 months ago
Text
“Hey Reddit, an update”
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aita series masterlist previous part
author's note: tysm for the incredible amount of notes, reblogs and likes the series has had. i'm completely amazed by it :D i would love to read your opinions on this! hope you enjoy this part! there is just one part left to the series and that makes me really sad but life goes on (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥`)
this has 5k words!!!! sorry!
warnings: a bit of angst, fluff and SMUTTTTTTTTT (smut will start and finish after this: *****) so please, mdni!!! p.s.: haven’t written smut in ages so……….
The university was buzzing with the usual midday energy when Tsukishima stepped through the front doors. Multiple students were going in and out of the several buildings, ready to go home or get some lunch. Tsukishima fixed his tie, nervous. It was two days after their painful phone conversation and even though he didn't want to admit it, talking to Akiteru about everything made him more aware of (Y/N)'s feelings. He couldn't let things stay the way they were. He didn't want to lose the woman of his dreams just because he cannot deal with his plans and his nerves towards his future proposal.
Clutching the bento in his hand, he made his way through the education building. (Y/N) was in her last days of finishing the first draft of her book so she was likely to be at the small office Fujimoto-san, her mentor, had given her to work on it. The smell of (Y/N)'s favourite food wafted from the bento and, despite the knots in his stomach, he hoped this would be the first peace offering that would get them closer.
He had tried his best to get her to come home, texting her the previous day with little success, only receiving a yes/no answer to his texts. He had even tried contacting Yachi but the smaller girl was completely blinded by rage towards him ("Tsukishima, you're a fucking asshole and if you think I'll let you hurt my best friend, you're terribly wrong about it. I may be 5 feet tall but I know how to punch someone, especially tall guys like you.") He regretted his actions from that night, including the complete silence he gave her when she was just trying to get an explanation from him.
When he reached her office, Tsukishima took a deep breath, stopping at the doorway. He was nervous to even see her as she had been staying at Yachi’s, knowing she had been at home showering and taking clean clothes whenever he was at work thanks to the smell of her coconut shampoo and the missing socks from the pile of laundry he needed to get through. As he was about to knock on the door, a voice called his name and he turned.
"Fujimoto-san."
"I knew it was you, Tsukishima." Fujimoto-san was a 55-year-old university professor that had been (Y/N)'s professor during her first year. He had been with her through every stage of her university degree and he was the one to who proposed writing a book on second language methodologies to her and the one who accompanied her during her research in the US. Tsukishima was grateful that (Y/N) had found someone who was giving her the support she needed to get over the project, almost acting like a father figure towards (Y/N). "What are you doing here?"
"I was bringing (Y/N) some lunch."
"Oh! That's so nice of you, boy. She hasn't been out of the office for the whole day." Fujimoto knocked on the door and without even waiting for an answer, he opened the door.
(Y/N) was sitting at her desk, completely absorbed in her work, clicking the keys on the keyboard quickly as she wrote, brows furrowed in concentration.
"(Y/N)."
"Fujimoto-san, sorry, I haven't been able to find the document you asked me for." She looked up, surprise flashing across her face as she saw her boyfriend next to the professor before her expression hardened slightly. She wasn't expecting him here. "Kei."
"He brought you some food, isn't that great?"
(Y/N) gave her mentor a soft smile and stood up, getting close to them. With a smile, she reached for the bento on his hands.
"I just wanted to let you know that he's here. I'll leave you two lovebirds eat alone."
"Thank you, Fujimoto-san."
The man waved his hands, leaving the office and closing the door behind him.
"Kei," she said, her tone uncertain, guarded. "What are you doing here?"
Tsukishima shifted, feeling awkward. "I thought you might be hungry," he said, voice softer than usual. "And… I wanted to talk."
Her eyes flickered to the bento, then back to his face, her expression unreadable. For a moment, she didn’t say anything, and Tsukishima’s heart pounded in his chest, nervousness gnawing at him. What if she didn’t want to hear him out? What if she was done?
But finally, she sighed, gesturing for him to sit down.
Relief washed over him as he sat down on a chair. "It’s your favorite," he added quietly, watching her reaction.
(Y/N) looked at the food, then back at him. Her walls were still up, and he could feel the distance between them. But she was here. She was listening.
"Thanks," she muttered, but there was still tension in her voice. "But you didn’t have to bring me food just to say whatever you came to say."
"I know," Tsukishima said, sliding his hands into his pockets. "But I wanted to."
There was another long pause before (Y/N) sighed, leaning back in her chair. "I can’t talk right now, I have a meeting in 10.”
“Oh.” Tsukishima shifted on his feet, feeling the weight of rejection settle uncomfortably on his shoulders. “I didn’t know.”
(Y/N) sighed softly, the tension between them palpable even in her small office. “I really can’t talk right now,” she repeated, glancing over at her desk again. “But maybe… we could talk after work? At home?”
Her voice was quieter on that last part, as if she was extending a tentative olive branch. Tsukishima nodded immediately, relief washing over him despite the lingering tension. “Yeah. Tonight, at home. We can talk then.”
She nodded, and for a moment, their eyes met—there was something fragile in her gaze. It made his chest ache. “Okay,” she whispered, opening the bento. “Thank you for the food.”
He didn’t press her further, didn’t try to fix everything in that moment. Instead, he turned to leave, hoping that maybe, just maybe, they’d be able to find their way back to each other that night.
*****
Later that evening, Tsukishima sat on the couch, waiting, his fingers tapping rhythmically against his knee as he tried to calm his nerves. His mind was racing, replaying everything that had happened between them—how distant he had become, how his silence had hurt her more than he’d realized.
When (Y/N) finally walked through the door, she looked drained from the long day. She dropped her bag by the door and glanced over at him, offering a small wave.
“Hi,” she said softly, as if unsure of how to start.
“Hey,” he replied, standing up awkwardly. “You want to sit down?”
She nodded, walking over to the couch and sitting down next to him, but there was still a noticeable gap between them. The air between them felt heavy, weighted down by everything they hadn’t said.
For a long moment, neither of them spoke. The silence stretched on, thick with tension and uncertainty, and Tsukishima felt the guilt gnawing at him. He hated how far apart they felt, how much he had hurt her without meaning to.
Finally, (Y/N) took a deep breath, her voice small and shaky when she spoke. “Kei, I… I don’t even know where to begin.”
He swallowed hard, his throat tight. “I know,” he muttered, his gaze dropping to his hands. “I’ve been terrible about all of this. I’ve shut you out, and I didn’t realize how much it was hurting you. I’m sorry.”
(Y/N) bit her lip, looking down at her lap. “It’s not just that you shut me out, Kei. It’s everything… You’ve been staying late, coming home at random hours, and… Mia—”
Her voice broke slightly as she said the name, and Tsukishima’s heart sank.
“You obviously don't notice but I’ve seen the way she looks at you,” she continued, her words trembling. “I've noticed since that time you were out with your coworkers and I had to give you your keys and from that moment, she’s always around, and I just—I couldn’t help but think that maybe you were spending time with her. Maybe… maybe you were choosing her over me.”
Her voice cracked, and she quickly wiped away a tear that slipped down her cheek, trying to maintain her composure. But Tsukishima could see how much this had been eating at her, festering under the surface.
“I felt so stupid for thinking that,” she whispered, her shoulders shaking slightly. “But I couldn’t help it. Every time you were late, every time you didn’t answer my texts… I thought maybe I was losing you to her.”
Tsukishima’s chest tightened painfully as he listened to her. The thought that she had been feeling like this—feeling jealous, insecure, like she wasn’t enough—it tore him apart inside. He had completely ignored her, left her on the dark on everything and his words from two nights before were eating him alive, seeing her like that. He had been so focused on keeping the surprise, on managing everything on his own, that he hadn’t even seen how much he was hurting her.
“Y/N,” he said softly, his voice filled with regret. He reached out, gently taking her trembling hands in his. “Mia means nothing to me. I don’t even notice her like that. She’s just a coworker. You... You’re the one I love. You’re the only one I want.”
Her lip quivered, and more tears fell from her eyes. She looked away, trying to compose herself, but the pain was too raw, too fresh. “But you...” she whispered. “You never told me what was going on, so I didn’t know… I didn’t know what to think. All those nights at the museum or with the computer here at home... I don't know, I felt so...”
Tsukishima squeezed her hands gently, his heart aching. “I should have told you sooner,” he admitted, his voice low. “I didn’t mean to make you doubt yourself or us. I was just… trying to plan something special for us. That’s why I’ve been working late. I’ve been trying to get everything ready for our anniversary. I've been looking for the best place where we can relax and I've been trying to get days off by just... overworking, I guess.”
She looked up at him through her tears. “Our anniversary?”
“Yeah,” he nodded, his voice soft. “I’ve been planning a trip. Just the two of us. I wanted it to be a surprise, but in trying to keep it secret, I ended up shutting you out. I’m sorry. I never meant to make you feel like you weren’t enough. I'm the worst at these things. I hate surprises.”
(Y/N) blinked, more tears falling, but this time there was a flicker of relief in her expression. “You were doing all that for us?”
“I was,” he said, brushing a tear from her cheek with his thumb. “But that doesn’t excuse how I handled it. You shouldn’t have had to worry about Mia or think that I didn’t care. I should’ve been open with you, told you what was going on, not leaving you like nothing was happening. I was a complete asshole with you.”
Her shoulders trembled, and she let out a shaky breath, wiping at her eyes. “I felt so stupid, Kei,” she whispered. “I felt like I wasn’t good enough for you, like I was… like I was losing you to her.”
Tsukishima’s heart clenched, and without another word, he pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly. “You’re not losing me,” he murmured into her hair, his voice soft but firm. “You’re never going to lose me. She isn’t even a thought in my mind. You’re the one I want, Y/N. You’ve always been the one.”
Her hands gripped his shirt tightly, and she sobbed quietly into his chest, letting out all the emotions she had been holding in. Tsukishima held her close, his hand gently stroking her back.
After a few moments, she pulled back slightly, her face streaked with tears. “I don’t want to feel like this again,” she whispered, her voice broken. “I don’t want to keep thinking I’m not enough for you.”
“You are enough,” he said firmly, cupping her face in his hands, forcing her to look into his eyes. “You’re more than enough. I’m sorry I made you doubt that. I’ll do better. I promise I’ll be honest with you from now on. We’ll talk about everything—no more shutting each other out.”
She sniffled, her fingers curling around his wrist, holding onto him like he was her anchor. “I just want to feel like I matter to you, Kei.”
“You do,” he whispered, his thumb gently brushing her cheek. “You matter more than anyone. I love you. I’ve always loved you, and I’m sorry I didn’t show that enough. I’ll do better. You are my everything. I won't hurt you like this again.”
She nodded, tears still clinging to her lashes, but the weight between them seemed to lift, just a little. “We’ll figure this out,” she whispered. “Together. I also need to communicate my feelings better."
Tsukishima leaned forward, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead, lingering there for a moment before moving onto her lips, kissing them for just a second. “Together,” he echoed, his heart swelling as he held her close.
"We really suck at this sometimes," she muttered.
"Yeah, we do."
They both laughed softly, still holding each other tight.
*****
(OP) tsuk113_:
Hey Reddit, an update.
Seems like we just needed to have a long and conversation between us. I took your comments and advice from friends to heart and explained everything to her. I told her about the surprise trip (but not about me proposing on that trip, surprise, I guess) and everything has gone well. WE are working on our problems and I promised her to be better. I need to be better for her because she is truly the best thing that has happened to me.
Anyway, trip is just a few days away and I'm actually nervous about proposing but, I hope it goes right.
*****
The drive up the mountains had been long, winding through dense forests and past breathtaking views, but the destination was worth it. Tsukishima had booked a secluded cabin that sat high up, surrounded by towering trees and overlooking a serene, glassy lake. The autumn air was crisp, carrying the scent of pine and earth, and the sky above was a brilliant expanse of deep blue. It was the kind of place that felt untouched by time, peaceful, and far removed from the hectic pace of their daily lives.
(Y/N) had been in better spirits since their talk. Tsukishima had worked hard to open up to her, to let her in on how overwhelmed he had been. And while she didn’t know the full reason for the trip, she had let herself hope that this weekend away was his way of making things right between them and celebrate their anniversary as well.
After they had settled into the cabin and left their small suitcases by the beautiful bedroom that had amazing views to the lake, (Y/N) found herself touring the place as Tsukishima started to cook them dinner, standing by the long railing at the balcony, appreciating the views and fresh air, the view of the mountains and lake calming her completely. She smiled softly as she took it all in, admiring the leaves on the trees and their vivid shades of gold, red and orange, making the entire scene look like something out of a painting.
Tsukishima had been looking at her from his place at the kitchen, the weight of the ring in his pocket settling in, waiting for the right moment.
As the sun began to set, casting the sky in shades of pink and lavender, Tsukishima suggested they take a walk before they have some dinner.
Taking their coats and putting on more comfortable shoes, they stepped outside into the cool evening air, the path they followed covered in fallen leaves that crunched beneath their boots. (Y/N) held her boyfriend's hand, leaning against him as they walked in comfortable silence. He had found the perfect place to relax and she was grateful for it. (Y/N) breathed deeply, feeling the tension of the last few weeks melting away in the serenity of the surroundings.
As they reached the lake, (Y/N) walked away from Tsukishima, leaning towards it, looking at the sky. "This place is amazing," she said, voice soft as she looked at the lake glimmering under the fading sunlight. "If this were a movie, we would see a proposal right now."
Tsukishima's heart skipped a beat as his hand made his way towards his front pocket.
"Is that so?"
(Y/N) laughed, completely unaware of the scene that was about to happen behind her. "I think we are the only people here, though, but..." She streched her arms out to the horizon. "Wouldn't that be something?"
When she turned back around to make another playful comment, the words died on her lips.
Tsukishima was no longer standing behind her. Instead, he was down on one knee, his tall frame somehow looking both awkward and incredibly graceful at the same time. In his hand was a small velvet box, the lid open to reveal a delicate, sparkling ring.
(Y/N)’s heart stopped. Her breath caught in her throat, her hands flying to her mouth as she stared at him in disbelief.
For a moment, neither of them said anything. Tsukishima, for all his careful planning, looked almost… shy. His usual sharp gaze softened as he looked up at her, the words he had rehearsed for weeks suddenly feeling far more significant now that she was standing there, her eyes wide and her lips trembling in surprise.
“(Y/N),” he began, his voice low and steady, though his heart was racing in his chest. “I’ve never been good at showing how much you mean to me. I know I’ve messed up, more than once… but you’ve been with me through it all. And I can’t imagine spending the rest of my life with anyone else. These 5 years with you as my girlfriend have been the best years of my life. You have taken care of me, loved me and I can't be more grateful that you are mine.”
(Y/N) was already tearing up, her hand still covering her mouth as she let out a soft, breathless laugh.
“I’ve been thinking about this for a long time.” Tsukishima continued, his voice just a little quieter now, as if speaking the words made him feel vulnerable in a way he wasn’t used to. “I want us to have forever. So… will you marry me?”
For a moment, the world seemed to stand still. The only sounds were the gentle rustling of leaves in the breeze and the soft murmur of the lake below. (Y/N) stared down at Tsukishima, her heart pounding so loudly she could barely hear anything else. (Y/N) got on her knees, looking at Tsukishima, the man in front of her blushing.
“Yes,” she breathed, her voice cracking with emotion. “Yes, of course!”
Tsukishima let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, his lips pulling into a rare, genuine smile. He, carefully, took the ring away from the box, slipping the ring onto her finger with careful precision, as though it was the most important thing he’d ever done. Once the ring was in place, he cupped her face in his hands, leaning down to press his lips against hers.
(Y/N) closed the distance between them, her arms wrapping around his neck as she kissed him, the taste of salty tears on her lips from the emotions spilling over. In that moment, it felt like everything had fallen into place.
When they finally pulled away, (Y/N) laughed, shaking her head in disbelief. “I can’t believe I just joked about you proposing.”
Tsukishima raised an eyebrow, his smirk returning. “Timing is everything.”
She laughed again, glancing down at the ring on her finger. It had a parti sapphire as a centerpiece, a gem with a blend of rich forest green and subtle blue hues. The sapphire, in an oval shape, was set in a delicate gold band surrounded by what it seemed like small diamonds. It was, elegant and perfect—just like him, in his own way.
“Wow, Kei... It is beautiful... I can’t believe you managed to keep this a secret,” she said, wiping the tears from her cheeks. “You, the guy who hates surprises.”
Tsukishima shrugged, a slight flush coloring his cheeks. “I figured you were worth making an exception for. To be honest, I thought you were going to find the ring at home.”
"What!?" (Y/N) gasped. "Where was it?"
"I know you hate grocery shopping so I hid the box between the bags I take shopping."
(Y/N) laughed, her heart swelling with so much love she thought it might burst. She reached up to brush a stray piece of hair out of his eyes, her thumb tracing the familiar curve of his jaw.
“I love you,” she whispered, her voice full of everything she felt but couldn’t quite put into words.
Tsukishima’s eyes softened, and for once, he didn’t feel the need to hold back. “I love you too.”
Their lips met in a kiss that was soft, sweet, and filled with everything unsaid. It wasn’t hurried or desperate—it was gentle, almost reverent. Her hands slid up to cup his face, his glasses cool under her fingertips as she pulled him closer, deepening the kiss just a little. It was a kiss that spoke of promises and forever, a merging of relief, joy, and love so deep it made their heart ache in the best way possible.
Tsukishima’s hands tightened around her, pulling her flush against him, and for once, he let himself be completely open, pouring all the love he had into that single kiss. As they finally pulled apart, their foreheads rested together, both of them smiling breathlessly, the world quiet except for the pounding of their hearts in sync.
*****
(Y/N) hugs Tsukishima from behind, enjoying the warmth of his body as he washes the dishes of their dinner. Tsukishima can't help the smile on his lips as his eyes glance down to her ring, sparkling under the lights of the kitchen. For a moment, he is grateful about the lack of signal of their phones because for once, (Y/N) is not checking her emails constantly (seriously, Tsukishima reckons she has a Gmail addiction) and secondly, because she's been teasing him all night, running her fingers, especially her ring finger, through his arm, chest and neck, kissing him slowly, running her tongue over his lips, well, teasing him more and more as the night went on.
Tsukishima dried his hands and turned around, pulling (Y/N) flush against his chest, cupping her face as he slowly leans down to brush their lips together, hands around her hips, massaging the eposed skin between her sweatshirt and her soft pajama bottoms. Without a second though, (Y/N) pulls away, taking his arm, leading him upstairs. As soon as she reaches the bedroom door, she opens it, pulling Tsukishima by his T-shirt to get him inside.
As their kisses grow deeper which every passing second, the man quickly takes off his glasses and T-shirt, leaving them at one of the bedsides tables before running his hands through (Y/N)'s body, undressing her slowly. First, her sweatshirt, leaving her bare from the waist up.
"God, you're so beautiful."
(Y/N) blushes but doesn't waste a second and takes off her pajama bottoms and underwear, pushing them aside with her foot before siting down at the end of the bed and spreading her legs.
Tsukishima can't help it and his eyes slowly make their way towards her most intimate part and he slowly, gets down on one knee and grabs her leg, kissing her leg and inner thigh, before, after what it seem like an incredible amount of time, delving in like a starved man.
Tsukishima lifted one of (Y/N)'s legs up, placing it atop of his shoulder as he parted her lower lips and started to lap his tongue in her.
He moans out, the vibrations of it sending a shiver all over (Y/N)'s body as she cries out his name, hands making its way towards his blonde hair.
Her breath hitches when Tsukishima makes a slurping sound as if he was tasting the most delicious meal in the world.
Tsukishima, eyes closed at the taste of his fiancée, cups her heat, one of his long fingers pressing against her walls.
"Oh, Kei..." (Y/N) opens her mouth, a loud moan leaving her throat, chest heaving. "Right there, baby. Jesus...."
"Right there, pretty?"
"Uh-huh, please! God, yes."
The combination of his mouth and fingers curling inside her shocks her with a wave of pleasure and she pulls on his hair, a gasp leaving his lips as he looks up at her. He can't believe it. He can't believe that the beautiful woman in front of him, so overcome with plasure, is his, forever. Tsukishima smirks, adding another finger as (Y/N) glances down to look at him as her body goes still, climaxing in a long and wonderful orgasm, moaning a mixture of what it seemed like Tsukishima’s name and several curse words.
Tsukishima looks at her once again, soflty massaging her thigh for a few seconds, letting her relax a little bit before rising to his feet and pushing her into the mattress, laying on top of her as her arms make their way around his neck.
From then, (Y/N) slowly reaches to take off his sweat pants, the sight of him that hard making her mouth water, still feeling a bit hazy from her orgasm. Teasing, she fondles with him for just a few seconds, hand slowly inside his boxers, touching him. Her hand moves up and down as she keeps her eyes on him, Tsukishima's eyes closing due to the feeling of her soft hand and the coldness of her new ring on him.
"I love you."
Tsukishima nearly comes at the sound of that and he inhales sharply, smiling. He can feel her everywhere, her hand moving the way he likes it, her lips moving and kissing along his jaw, neck and lips, the sight of her bare pussy... God, he is in heaven.
She pushes his boxers down, straddling his lap as she slaps his throbbing tip on her clit a few times before alinging it with her entrance, slowly making her way down, the sound of his name leaving her mouth as he fills her up.
"Fuck..." Tsukishima bites his lip as (Y/N) slowly moves her hips slowly, splaying her hands on his chest as she moved up and down, an animalistic look in her eyes as she watches him whimper. Without thinking, she grabs two of his fingers and places them inside her mouth, biting and licking them.
"Jesus, fuck."
"Tell me... Tell me what you want, pretty boy."
"You... So bad."
(Y/N) smiles, leaning down to kiss him slowly, the eye contact between them so suffocating that Tsukishima feels like he is going to explode. The feeling of her body on top, the pressure and warmth of her walls. It's too much. Tsukishima doesn't let her move and he cups her cheeks, sucking on her tongue as they both sigh in pleasure.
"Baby..." Tsukishima grabs her breast. "You're so pretty. You're so pretty when you fuck me."
(Y/N) pants, laughing and her hand wraps itself about his throat, giving it a gentle squeeze. "Yeah?"
He nods, biting his lip.
"You're mine, Kei." (Y/N) hisses, bouncing on top of him with more strength. She was close, so, so so close. "You're mine forever."
"Forever."
(Y/N)'s back arches for just a second and Tsukishima notices her movements are getting sloppy and without even thinking about it, she grabs her by the waist and rocks their hips together, thrusting into her at an alarming pace, bed shaking a bit due to their movements.
"Oh, fuck!" (Y/N) moans, her hands touching his chest, reaching for his shoulder. "Like that, baby. I'm so..."
"I know, me too."
(Y/N) leans down to tug on his earlobes wit her teeth as she growls something not even him can't understand. Tsukishima quivers at the feeling of his cock reaching even deeper and for a moment, he feels like he is seeing stars.
"I'm going to cum, Kei!" Please, please, keep going!"
"Cum with me, baby. Cum with me." His voice becomes deeper as he feels his own orgasm approach him, looking at (Y/N), who had her face on his shoulder, sweat running through her forehead. Tsukishima kisses her slowly, hands moving her hair out of her face. "Fuck, (Y/N), where do you want it?"
"Inside, please." (Y/N) begs, her lips still brushing his. "Please, baby. I need it so bad."
"Yeah?"
"Yes, yes!"
Tsukishima's cock twitches inside of (Y/N), gasps leaving his mouth as he cums inside of her. They both jerk, the feeling of their orgams making them feel dizzy and light-headed.
"Fuck."
"Yeah..."
"That was..."
"So fucking good."
(Y/N) laughs as Tsukishima kisses her cheeks repeatedly, lips swollen from all their kissing.
"If I knew we were gonna fuck this good after proposing, I would have done it at 18."
"Kei!"
Tsukishima laughs loudly and (Y/N) melts, the sight of him like this... So happy and perfect... She hums, hiding her face on his neck for just a second.
"I love you so much."
"Me too."
"No. I don't think you understand." Tsukishima adds. "You really taught me what is like to love and even though I may not be perfect at it, I promise I will love you every single day of my life and even after death."
"Kei..."
"You are my everything, you know that, right?"
"You can't say things like that!"
"Why?"
"Because..." (Y/N) blushes, placing her hands on her face and getting up from the bed. "Because! I'm going to take a shower."
Tsukishima laughs, looking at her as she walks towards the bathroom door, biting his lip.
"Don't look at me like that and come shower with me."
"Yes, (Y/N) Tsukishima."
"Shut up!"
*****
(OP) tsuk113_:
I'M GETTING MARRIED FUCK YES
User 1:
Congratulations! After 20 years of being married, let me give you a piece of adivce: listen to each other. Enjoy the little moments together. I am sure your love is pure.
taglist: @lavanderdreamve @lizzymizzy-blogg @quilyzayaki @uhnanix
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tonkatsubowl · 1 year ago
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truth to be told, it takes a lot for aventurine to fully trust someone, let alone loving them.
the man had already lost so much, including his own sense of self. to be stabbed in his back, to be betrayed, to be mocked and used and made fun of—he was used to it. it would take aventurine a while for him to feel comfortable being vulnerable with someone, considering he didn't trust anyone in particular.
though the man wore a gorgeous smile, wandering through the streets of penacony, it wasn't a genuine smile, but a mask he put up. expensive clothing, his beautiful countenance and the abundance of money he liked to toss around... it was just a mask he put up. it was also for the sake of his own reputation, too. especially when you were directly under diamond herself.
the main suspect of his suffering. and the cause of his success. a double edged sword that he walked upon. his own life was theirs. a mere toy, a mere chess piece to gamble with.
...but when he met you, he was confused. afraid, even. but he put up a fake smile, some flirtatious words here and there, but the man did not trust you, nor did he believe you would be willing to stay by his side for an eternity for aeons know what.
when he met you, you were kind, understanding. you were a little stubborn, too, and humorous. you never failed to have aventurine laugh at your cute little jokes, and you never failed to protect him, whether it was against the ipc's mocking him in his name, or against nightmare infested monsters that dared to consume his flesh within a dream.
he was terrified of you.
he didn't know what you were doing to him.
every time he saw you, he felt... weak. vulnerable around you. and he hated it. he loathed it. he hated everything about how you were making him feel, as though you were a curse that came to haunt him due to the sins of his past.
every time he saw you, his heart began to palpitate, his chest aching. and it got worse whenever he saw you so happy with someone else. but... maybe you were better off with someone? everyone kept leaving him, after all, whether it was death or it was simply due to some gambling... game-thing. a business transaction, even.
but you stayed.
you stayed throughout the hardships he faced.
why?
just why?
why, of all people, did you want to stay with him? a once upon a time slave, now a business man specializing in manipulation, gambling (an addiction, to put it), and flirtatious words to soothe the mind so he could win his way.
even through everything, you were still here. that was when he decided to seek out a certain doctor.
he sat across from him, forcing a smile across his lips, but the doctor could see it. the mask that aventurine donned himself with.
"you're in love."
aventurine's eyes looked up to the other, "you must be misreading your books like usual."
"you came here... to me, for your thoughts."
aventurine chuckled to himself, nervously, even.
"love? i haven't heard that word in ages."
"it is a complicated thing. especially with how you can be, gambler. a man who is unpredictable, keen to the eye, and... well, unfamiliar with the positive things."
aventurine cleared his throat, toying with the golden coin in his hand. he purses his lips, his mask wearing off for a moment.
"...now, dr. ratio, i am not doubting your knowledge and intelligence, don't get me wrong. i just don't believe that it truly is such a strange thing called... love."
the genius sighed, "you complained to me the other day that you couldn't stand seeing (y/n) talking to others, smiling and laughing. i recall that i was not assigned to be your therapist, here. the rest should be obvious, but it appears you're too stubborn to catch on... or rather, you're unfamiliar with this feeling. this term. love."
bullseye. it was as though ratio had called him out completely. for once, the gambler was silent. here, he would try to make little comments here and there, some jokes there and wherever but... the man was actually silent.
"... what do you suggest i do, then?"
dr ratio leans in, resting both elbows on his knees, eyes fixated on the gambler's own pristine eyes.
"if you are comfortable with it, move at your own pace if you wish to pursue. this is ultimately your choice. you can pursue these feelings, or you may leave it. there is no right or wrong answer, here. this all depends on you and what you wish to do. love is about being vulnerable with each other. accepting each other at their lowest. being for one another. your lover is considered to be your number one companion, truthfully."
aventurine was quiet.
"what is your gambler's intuition?"
a sigh left aventurine's lips. he stood, flipping the coin in his hand, before showing the result of heads or tails.
"...i suppose i'll make a bet with myself. one that doesn't cost money or the finest of gold and jewelry."
the genius watched as the other male got up from his seat, retrieving his sunglasses from his expensive outfit, before placing them on. "i'll make a gamble, to be specific, about this."
"then i wish you the best of luck, aventurine."
months had past, and the two of you were already in a relationship. it had been months, but the man didn't dare to tell you, 'i love you' just yet. as a matter of fact, those words were terrifying for him. what if he lost you after he said that? what if something were to happen to you? he was terrified of saying it, as he wasn't ready yet.
dr. ratio was right—he was paranoid to the bone but hid it. yet, aventurine played a few cards and decided to gamble this relationship with you, to see if it could work out. and so far, everything was well.
you were understanding, kind, beautiful, patient... the perfect partner someone could ask for.
but it also felt undeserving.
did... he deserve this love? did he truly deserve to experience the harmony that his heart fluttered to? he began to doubt. then he spiraled into a panic.
he began to sleep restlessly at night, rendering himself vulnerable to nightmares and the instability of his mind.
... but you were there, throughout all of it.
his eyes shot open, the familiar warmth of your hand gently cupped at his left cheek. he had fallen asleep on the couch, reading a long text presented to him by his supervisor, which was mainly just work and business related things. he didn't realize he had fallen asleep, and at first was confused when he woke up.
his phone was placed securely on the table, and there was a blanket draped over him. the air conditioning was turned on for his comfort, and before him was a tray full of biscuits, tea... for him to savor in once he woke from his nightmare.
"are you... alright?" you asked. "you were having a bad dream."
his eyes traveled to your voice, finding your concerned expression, his palpitating heart now steadying at an easy rate. he began to breathe, his eyes softening.
you were here, at his most vulnerable state, concerned for his well-being. he was silent, but he immediately reeled you in for a gentle hug. he was reluctant, but he wanted to feel the rest of your warmth. your head was buried into his chest, and you could hear his heart slow down. he closed his eyes, calming down from his inner demons.
"...you're okay." you murmur, brushing the top of his hair with your hands. "i'm here for you."
you didn't know much about him at all, truth to be told. the man wasn't really comfortable sharing his past with you, yet. he was a locked chest, and in order to find the key to his past, you had to be patient. time was key, but whatever demons he was facing at night... he knew you would be there.
he had doubts, at first, and always believed that he'd always be alone.
but... you were a different story.
"...thank you," he whispers onto your ear, cradling you close to his chest, "for being here."
your gaze softens, and you were silent for a moment. this was the first time you've seen aventurine like this. so vulnerable, so... reliant on you. but you were okay. because everyone has their own weakness. not everyone was perfect, and you understood that.
"... don't thank me." you say, closing your eyes, taking in his scent as the two of you nuzzled up against each other on the couch, "please don't. it's my job—my duty, as your other half, to be here for you."
dr. ratio's words echoed into his brain, reminding him of what love truly is. being there for one another, no matter what.
"you haven't been here?"
months past, and aventurine is presenting a beautiful, scenic view of penacony for you. the night sky was phenomenal, and the beautiful sounds of crickets and late night critters were no more than music to your ears. you seat yourself at the bench, whilst the gambler was walking around, admiring the view... taking pictures, even.
"i haven't, but now i am." you say, flashing a smile.
aventurine took some time off today to take you out on a date. the man had more than enough sick and vacation leave to do this for you, and it's the first time where he actually used it.
he sits next to you, admiring the night sky, and the sight of you above all else.
"it's a beautiful sight. i come here when i want to... relax."
your gaze softens, and your hand comes towards his own. digits intertwine, and you murmur something, audible for your lover's ears.
"thank you for taking me here. to your safe place."
aventurine looks over to you, puzzled.
"... safe place, huh? didn't expect to... call it that. but i guess that's what you can say for this spot. i can feel at peace here." he nods slowly, looking back to the scenic view.
"... it's a spot where you can feel vulnerable and be okay with it," you say, instantly catching his attention, "and i want to thank you for trusting me to bringing me here. i really, really do appreciate it."
ratio's words echo through his mind once more, the pad of his thumb suddenly reaching over, gently lifting your chin. he leans in, granting you a subtle kiss, in which you've returned.
"... may... i be vulnerable, once again?"
he lowered his guard, his voice coming to a whisper.
"you... can always be vulnerable around me. i want to be your safe person." you respond, in a whisper.
"..." he was silent. "i love you."
it was the first time, too, that he said such a thing to you. such strong words that let your heart skip a few beats. your face comes to a faint, vermillion flush, but you were happy nonetheless. you smile, cupping each side of his face.
"i love you too."
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hischiershoe · 2 months ago
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Anonymous asked: The 'just friends' kiss that they have to do as a dare but they both like it and can't stop thinking about it <- with Nico
Note: I accidentally posted this before it was finished, but it was for blurb day so here ya go Warnings: drinking mentioned, kissing, cursing, grown adults playing a college game thanks to luke, very very sloppy ending.
It was mid-March, the air growing warmer, the sun glowing brighter, and the drinks getting colder. With spring finally gracing the likes of New Jersey, a few of the guys decided that it would be a good idea to book out the rooftop pool at one of their buildings and have a small get together. They always included a few of their other friends, which, of course, meant Nico inviting you like he always does, and that was exactly how you ended up laying out beside the pool as music filtered around you.
"So," Laney calls out, her hand gently slapping your bicep as she peers at you over her glasses, "You and Nico seal the deal yet?"
"Laney," You quietly gasp, propping yourself up, "There is no deal to seal. I told you that. We're just friends."
"Friends do not look at each other like that," Aly speaks up without lifting her head, her voice teasing and light as she settles further into her chair.
"Plus, I haven't seen Nico so much as look at a girl all season. There's got to be a reason for that," Laney plainly states, "And we all know that you haven't really been in the dating pool, either."
Your mouth drops open, partly in shock, and partly to deny their blatant, yet not entirely wrong, accusations, but a familiar voice smothers your chances by calling your name. Your gaze snaps to Nico, settling on where he stands in the middle of the guys with a bright smile on his face as he waves you over. You can hear the faint sounds of Laney and Aly's respective partners shouting for them, but you pay them no mind as you hastily rise to your feet and make your way to Nico.
"What's up," You breathe out, crossing your arms against your chest now that you were standing right in front of him.
"Some of the younger guys want to play some card game," He informs, smoothly slinging his arm over your shoulder and dragging you to the make shift circle around the table, "Luke said he learned it at school."
"Oh, that isn't terrifying at all," You laugh, ignoring the various sets of eyes that were giving you and Nico knowing looks.
Luke explained the rules of the game, with the help of Jack who had to butt in every so often to clarify something, and it was most definitely the kind of game that was played at frat parties. You missed the name of it, only half paying attention to the beginning because you were too focused on the way Nico's thigh was pressed against you, but you understood most of what was said. A few of the older guys tried getting out of it, playing the 'I'm too old for this' card, but they were swiftly denied.
Once the game was in full swing, you had already gotten a little tipsy from the various cards that called for you to drink, and it didn't help that the heat from the sun was already warming your body. It was making it easier for the alcohol to slip into your bloodstream and make your mind hazy, and Nico's fingers brush the top of your spine every so often was already doing an excellent job at that.
"Okay," You lean forward, fingers grasping the card on the top of the deck, "It's a seven. What does that mean again?"
Your eyes dart around the group of people, some of them sporting curious looks, and others wearing smug smirks on their faces.
Jack is the one to lean forward, a mischievous glint in his eyes as he says, "Seven is seventh heaven. Everyone does it differently, but we do spin the bottle and whoever it lands on, gets a smooch. On the lips, the cheek, the forehead, Whatever. Obviously, if it lands on someone married or something, you'd spin again."
"If you say no, you lose and you have to drink the cup," Luke gently reminds, earning a pointed look from you that sends him back into his seat.
Your eyes settle on the plastic cup in the middle of the table, contemplating downing the terrible concoction of beers, liquors, and wine coolers instead of participating in spin the freaking bottle like a horny teenager. After a few beats pass, you let out a dramatic sigh and call out for someone to hand you an empty bottle. The contents of that cup have to be horrendous, but you had zero intention in finding out just how horrendous.
You briefly let your stare fall on Nico only to find that he was already looking at you, his eyes careful and yielding in a way that made heat rush to your cheeks. Quickly turning away, you grasp the base of the bottle and let it spin, swallowing thickly as you watch it turn and turn until it begins to slow. Everyone's holding their breath as they watch it come to a stop, their eyes following the neck until they see just who is on the other end.
"No way," You hear one of the girls mumble under their breath.
"Oh boy," Stefan whistles over the blood pounding in your ears.
You can feel Nico lean forward, matching your position as you stay frozen in your spot with your gaze fixed on the bottle. Out of everyone the bottle could've landed on, it just had to be the one guy you'd thought about kissing far more times than you could count. You'd hope it would land on Laney or Aly or someone you could just peck on the cheek without another passing thought, but of course, fate had other ideas for you.
"Hey," Nico softly says, gently knocking his knee against yours, "You okay?"
You let out a nervous hum as you slide your focus to him, your heart pounding in your chest, "Yeah, I'm good. I just—”
"Okay, you two," Timo loudly cuts in before Nico can say anything else, a wide and obnoxious smile on his face, "Get to it."
“You heard Jack,” Nico carefully reminds, clearing his throat as he tries to keep his voice quiet and even, “It doesn’t have to be on the lips or anything.” Though he really really wanted it to be.
“Yeah,” You anxiously let out, your throat drying as you run your palms against your thighs, “But I have a feeling they’ll just make up another rule and say we have to do it over again.”
“That’s true,” You hear someone speak up from beside you, but neither you or Nico turn away from each other to see who it was.
Nico's eyes are unwavering, staying trained on your face as he watches a multitude of emotions flash in your eyes. He can see hesitancy written on your face, or maybe it's nerves, he can't really tell, but he doesn't have much time to dwell on it before you're surging forward and planting your lips on his.
It was quick, too quick if you asked Nico, nothing but a simple and chaste peck on the lips before you were retreating back to sink into your seat. You crossed your arms against your chest, avoiding looking at the others and ignoring their incomprehensible murmurs. You felt a little silly, getting so worked up and embarrassed over a game, but you’d spent the last few years wondering what it would be like to kiss Nico, and this wasn’t exactly what you’d had in mind.
You barely paid attention for the rest of the game, constantly letting your mind drift back to the feeling of Nico's lips on yours. Even if you only felt it for a fraction of a minute, it still left a lingering tingle that had you desperate for more. You could feel his stare on you more often than not, but you didn't dare to look in his direction. Not until you'd had enough time to calm down.
When the game was over and everyone dispersed, you were quick to slip out of your chair and put as much distance between you and Nico as possible. You weren't ready to hear whatever it was he had to say, and you definitely weren't ready to fae the possibility that he would say the one thing you knew would make you want to throw up.
'It didn't mean anything'.
"Slow down," Laney huffs from behind you, "You're not supposed to run by pools!"
"I'm not running," You toss over your shoulder as you come to a stop.
"The pinch in my side begs to differ," She argues, dramatically grabbing your shoulder as she tries to catch her breath, "I need to start doing cardio again, holy shit."
You playfully roll your eyes as you carefully tug her down onto the lounger, "Just don't drag me into that with you."
"Oh, I will," She wheezes before she straightens her back and turns to look at you, "Now, let's discuss what happened."
"What do you mean," You feign confusion, not meeting her eyes as you focus on fixing the straps of your bathing suit.
"Don't play stupid," She groans, "You kissed Nico! Finally!"
"Oh my god, keep your voice down," You hiss, glancing around to make sure no one heard her small outburst, "It was hardly a kiss, and it was just for a game."
Laney gives you a pointed look, her brows raised and lips pressed together in a flat line. She could see right through you, and you knew that she could. No matter how hard you tried to brush off or deny something, she could always tell when you we're lying to her, and to herself.
"If it was 'just for the game', then why'd you run away from him," She carefully presses.
"Because," You weakly shrug, casting your focus to your lap, "I don't know, Laney. It's embarrassing."
"Why," She tries as she places her hand on your knee to pull your attention to her, "You should've seen his face when you pulled away! I'm honestly surprised that he didn't drag you away and suck your face off then and there. And, I don't know if you've noticed, but he hasn't stopped looking at you since the game ended."
Before you can stop yourself, your eyes dart around the rooftop until they land on Nico, and she was right. He was already looking at you. Even from the other end, you could see the way his eyes softened when you met his stare. The corner of his lips were tugged upwards into a small, one you returned without a second thought.
"If he says something to me first, I'll talk to him about it," You force your gaze back to her, "Best I can do."
Nico doesn't end up saying anything to you about the kiss the rest of the day, and, if you were being honest, it got to you. While you hadn't stopped thinking about it, thinking about how it must feel to really kiss him, he seemingly had brushed it off like it was nothing. When you retreated back to your own apartment later that night, you were grateful that you could finally have a moment to yourself so that you could spiral.
You had just finished slipping on your pajamas when you heard the sounds of someone knocking on your door. You tried to rack your brain of potential visitors as your feet pad against the cool floor, but no one in particular came to mind. Though taking a quick look into the peephole nearly made you stumble backwards.
“Nico,” You call out in confusion as you pull the door open, “Is everything okay?”
“Can I come in,” He counters your question with one of his own.
“Uh, yeah, okay,” You mumble, moving away from the doorway so he could slip inside.
He’s still wearing his swimming trunks and damp t-shirt from earlier, his hair a mess on his head like he’d spent a few hours running his hands through it. His cheeks and nose were slightly tinged pink from the sun beating down, and you knew it was because he didn’t put sunscreen on his face. Nico always forget to do that.
“Nico,” You repeat his name, taking a careful step closer to him, “What’s going on?”
“I can’t stop thinking about it,” He rushes out, fully turning his body towards you. He was only a few inches away from you, so close that you could still smell the chlorine on him.
“Thinking about what,” You shakily ask as you cross your arms against your chest. You had a feeling as to what he was going to say, because you hadn’t stop thinking about it either, but you needed to hear him say it.
“That stupid game Luke made us play,” He scoffs, though there’s no malice in it, “Kissing you. It was only for a second but I can’t stop thinking about it. I can’t stop thinking about what it would feel like to get to really kiss you.”
Nico’s focus never falters from your face, his gaze piercing and pleading as he watches your eyes widen in surprise. Your breathing becomes even unsteadier than it was before, your heart pounding in your chest so loudly you’d be surprised if Nico couldn’t hear it. You were trying to wrap your head around his worlds, trying to convince yourself that it was real and not a dream you’d had several times over the last few years.
Your silence was making Nico nervous, forcing thoughts of regret to filter their way in his mind because maybe he’d made a mistake, but they disappeared when you placed a delicate hand on his chest. His muscles tensed under your touch, his body shuddering as you slid your hand up to his shoulder, to his neck until you were holding his jaw in your hands. You’re not entirely sure where your sudden brazenness came from, but you were taking it in stride and using it to your advantage.
“I haven’t stopped thinking about it either,” You reveal, your thumb brushing against the coarseness of his overgrown stubble, “Honestly, I think about what it would be like all the time.”
“Why don’t we find out then,” He lowly asks, his eyes darting to your lips as your tongue slides across them.
When your lips connect with his all over again, it was unlike anything you’d ever experienced before. Kissing Nico felt like you were floating above the clouds, you felt weightless and the only the thing keeping you grounded to the earth was his touch. It made you wonder why you’d ever bothered kissing anyone else before because none of them even came close to him.
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sarahreesbrennan · 6 months ago
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Thank you for writing Long Live Evil.
I'm no cancer survivor, so I haven't been through the horror that that must've been, congratulations to enduring and surviving, and my sincere condolences that you had to go through it.
But I am chronically ill (cystic fibrosis, genetic defect) and have so far lived for 5 years longer than my prognosis allowed. My health's been good and stabile for a long time now, but I remember times where I couldn't walk alone, had a 18/6 nasal cannula and a 24-hour IV drip instead of school or a future.
Now I'm working at university, an archaeologist, chipping away at writing stories for years and years, and incredibly glad and privileged to see the world. All this to say that seeing how hurt Rae was in the beginning (and again throughout the story, while also never truly forgetting her true roots and motives) and how she grew around it like a gnarled tree, was like catharsis for me. Having miraculously given a second chance, no matter how hard the fight to keep it will be; I haven't ever read any story talking about this in a way that made me feel seen and understood like this. Thank you also lots and lots for taking the time to mention Rae's appreciation for Rahela's curves — it's been the same for me, since I've managed to get out of the underweight-trap. It means a lot to me, and I guess to many others in similar situations, including you of course. Thank you for sharing this with us, it must've been hard to touch on a deeply personal experience like this in writing that's simultaneously removed from oneself through fiction (at least that's what I'm imagining).
Thank you, and I wish you nothing but the best, health, and lots of good days to come. Deeply curious to see how Rae's story will continue!
Thank you so much for this.
I am so glad you are alive. Thank you for that, too - for living on even when you couldn’t see a way forward and everything was helpless despair.
I haven’t been through what you’ve been through, either, but it’s a privilege to have shared adjoining experiences trapped in darkness, and to share gladness and the wide world with you now. I’m so sorry it happened, and so happy you have archaeology and stories, and the world has you.
I will be totally honest and say it has been hard sharing Long Live Evil with the world, and I’m so grateful to you for knowing that, and for sending this message because you knew. This book is highly personal to me, but it’s also meant to be a wild celebration of messiness, escapism, and finding humour in art and darkness. And that means to some it’s just a joke, and in the words of Joanna Russ, ‘she’s not really an artist and it’s not really art.’ And so it gets dismissed, and it does hurt to see my most important story dismissed sometimes.
I was with other writers in a public space at one point and they were talking about how their books were about serious issues while ‘Sarah’s book is just for fun, and that’s fine too!’ (I had to take a minute before I could lean into my microphone and say ‘My book is about cancer’ in a cheery tone.) I’ve seen readers saying ‘this book’s just fluff, just silly, I’m ashamed of myself for reading it, there’s nothing to it’ about the book I wrote about almost dying.
My Rae, while of course she has bits of me in her (every character I’ve ever written does), and evil queens I’ve loved, and characters with wild hubris going on in the Greek plays I mention often in the book, and readers I’ve seen and I’ve been who are blithely confident they know what’s going on without doing more than surface reading and while forgetting key details… she’s also bits of women and girls I’ve mentored, been mentored by, befriended. And some of them are dead. So seeing the bits that were them particularly scorned or judged, seeing her pain dismissed or the discussion of her body sneered at…
That has been hard.
But.
In the end I believe I am really an artist and this book is really art, and art is there for the wide world to judge - to be mocked and dismissed, yes, as a price that comes with the opportunity to also be truly seen and appreciated, to get to influence real people’s real lives. Art is the gold that comes from the crucible in which we put all our pain and all our love and all our joys. I believe it deepens and transforms.
I wrote this book about how deeply unsympathetic people actually are to sufferers of illness, chronic or otherwise, and especially to women expressing pain. How the world villainises imperfect victims—which means all victims. How the world villainises bodies, and robs us of our joy in them—even when there’s horror in a body, too. I did know that by putting this book out into this world, that attitude would be reflected back by the world onto the book. And that attitude has hurt me in the past, and hurts me when I see it now.
I still think it’s worth calling out that attitude, even if it means getting more of that attitude reflected back onto me - because it means readers like you see it, and know others have been through this, and it was never okay, and you were never alone. While I know there will also be readers with chronic illnesses and/or cancer whose experience doesn’t overlap with mine at all, that only means there need to be more stories. So everyone who needs it gets the map into fantasy lands.
And I do hope some able-bodied readers read it, and think twice about adopting the world’s attitude to the people in their lives who are already going through enough. Some readers have told me the book helped them sympathise with and understand the cancer sufferers in their family and friend circles, and that’s meant a great deal. What do we write for, if not to learn to love each other better?
Long Live Evil has also given me my life back, as truly as chemo did, in a way that makes the pain worthwhile - I think I would have kept telling stories in some form, but Long Live Evil was my last throw, for as far ahead as I could see. Now since the book’s done well so far I’m hoping I can write more books, and my life can be the storytelling shape I always wanted it to be.
I read your message and I regretted nothing. I remember the pain and the way so many of us laughed or tried to laugh our way through it, and I know this was my way. Jokes, like stories, are the golden thread we follow through the dark labyrinth of our own agony and incomprehension.
It really has been hard, and it’ll stay hard. But like living, it’s worth it.
Please know two things.
I am so happy I wrote this book. Ultimately more than any other feeling I had so, so much fun writing it, and I’m having even more fun seeing the book be read by the people it was meant for.
2. This book was written for you.
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cheezeybread · 10 months ago
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Hello :) My request is MC/Yuu overblotting- but not with magic! What I picture is them having a nervous breakdown. It starts off with them hyperventilating and being unresponsive. Then it devolves into them screaming their head off until their voice starts going hoarse and hitting anyone who tries to touch them. Maybe even throwing and destroying things. Afterwards, they refuse to speak to Crowley- even avoiding him- due to his role in their breakdown. In my mind their breakdown is caused by long term stress and triggered by Crowley telling them that there is no way for them to go home.
YES
I love this idea, it's been bouncing around in my brain for so long <3
TW // Harsh language, violent depicitions, graphic metaphors, ANGST
Uhhhh, I took some creative liberties here and there, so some things (mainly regarding Idia and Malleus because I haven't gotten up to their books in the game and refuse to look up spoilers LMAO) may not be 100% canon oopsies!
︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶
You were starting to feel exhausted.
Well, that was an understatement, You had felt exhausted ever since you arrived at NCR...but this feeling was something slightly different. It was like a nagging sensation, yet also like some sort of wet rag placed over your mind at the same time. It was concerning, to say the least, but it was something you would have to shrug off until you could find the free time to fix it.
Which most likely wouldn't be anytime soon, knowing how the days went for you.
Grim was always priority number one. Keeping him out of trouble meant constantly keeping an eye on him, de-escalating any fights that he might try to kick up if left alone for a single moment. And since the two of you were technically one student, that meant that his grades were yours. Even though he was the only one out of the both of you that could use magic, he still slacked off at every turn, which left you to straighten every corner he tried to cut, finish every project that he wrote one sentence on and left, finish every alchemy potion he left bubbling on the cauldron, even if you had your own stuff to complete.
Then there were the tasks given to you by Crowley, your "ever so kind" benefactor. Despite his school getting you into this mess in the first place, Crowley considered it your fault, and as such, made you complete various chores to earn your weight around school. Which, paired with your classes, made for a day in and of itself. This isn't to include the yard-long to-do list he gave you at the start of every week, most of the points looking suspiciously like tasks the Headmaster was supposed to do himself...
And there were the students. Some you didn't know tried to kick up fights with you, knowing you couldn't use magic back on them. So you had to learn to avoid these students, or make sure you were always traveling with a friend. And as for your friends, every single one came to you with their problems day in and day out. A dorm dispute, so they needed to crash at Ramshackle for the night and eat all of your food. An overblot. More fights. Homework. Tutoring sessions. Projects they needed your help with.
You shook the thoughts out of your mind and continued walking to class with Grim, the Direbeast nestled in the crook of your arm as you balanced both yours and his schoolbooks in the other arm.
"And then, Ace was all like-" His voice sounded unusually high-pitched today. Or maybe that was just your imagination? Either way, it was giving you a headache.
"YN!" Another voice called out, the owner quickly jogging up to you. Ace and Deuce, ever the duo. You nodded your head at them in greeting, as Grim twisted his head around to look at them.
"Ace! Hah, I was just telling YN about what happened yesterday in the courtyard!" At the mention of the incident, Ace's face blanched, and the boy looked uncomfortable and ashamed.
"Oh, you mean with him and Professor Crewel?" Deuce spoke up, laughing already "Yeah, that was hilarious- remind me again, why exactly did he-"
"YN!" Now came one of the twins- normally you wouldn't have much of an issue telling them apart, but your head was starting to pound even harder now, making your vision a little blurrier. The fact that he didn't greet you with a nickname most likely meant that it was Jade.
"Oh...hey," You greeted, your brows furrowing from the pain in your head.
"Have you been to the greenhouse recently? I seem to have misplaced-"
"SHRIMPY" Ah, and there was twin number two. You felt your shoulders being constricted in a strong hug, much to Grim's dismay
"STAWPIT, YOU'RE CRUSHIN ME!" The Direbeast yowled, practically clawing himself out of your arms and jumping down onto the ground.
"Yo, YN, are you alri-" Ace started, but he, too, was interrupted
"YN!" Oh great! You recognized the Headmaster's annoying voice anywhere. And he waltzed up to you with all the elegance of an unpolished piece of charcoal, one hand reaching out to pull your arms free of Floyd's vice grip, and his other hand dropping a stack of papers into your now-outstretched arms. "Please, finish all of these by the end of this week, if you don't mind. It's papers for the senior's internships this year, and they need to be signed to be official, but I'm much too busy doing...other things...to be bothered."
"Are you still looking for a way to get me home?" You heard yourself mumble out loud, without even thinking of asking that question in the first place. But you had made it a habit to ask Crowley every time you saw him, so perhaps it was just muscle memory.
"Oh!" He chirped, straightening the front of his suit "Ah, yes, well, in my infinite wisdom, I have found out the reason to your barging in on our new-year's orientation, how you came to be here. But as for you returning, hmm, yes, I have managed to conclude that it is thoroughly impossible."
He said it so casually that it took you a moment to digest what had been said.
The students around you had gone silent, and you could feel their eyes all turning to you.
"What." Was all you could manage.
Crowley became increasingly uncomfortable, fidgeting with the watch he kept buttoned to his vest, then brushing off his front side, then folding his arms before repeating the process again "It is impossible to return you home, I'm afraid," he said with as much bravado as he could muster "Now, as for your stay here, since there is nothing left that I can do, you will need to continue to work for-"
Everything seemed to crumble around you in that exact moment. The feeling of damp, dreaded annoyance that had been bubbling up in the back of your mind all day came to the surface at once, and you couldn't help but slam your eyes shut tight against the world. You didn't want to see that damn Crow, you didn't want to see your friends, you didn't want to see anybody!
You opened your mouth to speak in that moment, dropping to your knees, but all that came out was a painful, sorrow-filled wail, so loud and so harsh that you could feel the inside of your throat shred with every passing second.
A puddle of black ink started to fill your mind's eye, growing larger and larger until it was all your brain could think of.
𓆩⟡𓆪
Every dorm in the school was based off of one of the Great Seven. All but for the Ramshackle dorm, a long-forgotten piece of trash that rested on the campus of the school rather than in its own pocket dimension like the others.
Every housewarden embodied the spirit of their designated Great.
Riddle Rosehearts idolized the Queen of Hearts, following every law she had set in her chaotic kingdom, becoming as strict and severe with the enforcement of rules as she was.
Leona Kingscholar was a second-born, raised in the shadow of his older brother and sneered at by his people, and now had to live with the knowledge that he would never be a ruler with the birth of his nephew.
Azul Ashengrotto was an octo-mer, much like the Sea Witch, who specialized in contracts with those who were less fortunate and needed a favor.
Jamil Viper, although not a Housewarden, technically, but some would argue that he deserved to be such, was a consultant for the person in charge- someone he viewed as daft and naive to the ways of the world.
Vil Schoenheit, a man who wanted nothing more than to be considered the "Fairest of All", unable to cope with the fact that there was one who might be better than he.
Idia Shroud, a "loner" by typical standards, was born from a family long cursed, a family seen as Pariahs due to their research and studies.
Malleus Draconia, a descendant of Faes, royalty, with horns that rivaled the Great Thorn Fairy's. Despite longing for human interaction, and simply to be included, he was shunned for his bloodline and odd actions.
But you, Prefect of Ramshackle dorm, had no one to model yourself after.
You were nobody.
Every Housewarden Overblotted, one after another, because they couldn't be the spitting image of the great Seven, because of pressure, because they didn't realize that they were only teenagers who didn't have to be perfect.
Riddle overblotted because he couldn't grasp the concept of being wrong. Leona, because he wouldn't be anything greater than a second-born scum. Azul, because all his work was shredded and he was left with no power to put him above those who bullied him years ago. Jamil, because he had enough of pretending to be someone he wasn't. Vil, because he couldn't admit that he wasn't perfect. Idia, because he wanted freedom. Malleus, because he was tired of himself and the hatred others showed him.
Which only left you.
Nobody.
The nobody who landed in this strange new world, a world in which everyone had magic...except for you. A world were you were less than. A world where you were treated like a burden, despite everyone laying all of their problems on you, demanding you fix them. A world where, no matter how hard you tried, you would always, always be less than.
A nobody.
𓆩⟡𓆪
Then entire campus of NCR shook with your rage and sorrow.
The students both outside and inside stopped, simultaneously looking at whoever was closest to them before running to the source of the wail.
Everyone was silent. What could they do?
It was an overblot, the school's nurse would officially state later, brought on by stress and pushing yourself past the limit. Although you had no magic to push yourself over the edge with, the sheer amount of mental exhaustion you were being put through would work just as well as an exertion of magic, if not more so. In the privacy of their rooms and dorms, assured that no prying ears would overhear them, the students agreed amongst each other that it was more terrifying of a sight than anyone else's overblot they've seen. Yours was one of pure emotion, without any magic to artifically amplify it. Pure and untainted.
And while anyone else who overblotted could only use their magic, you held something far more powerful.
You held the emotions of hundreds of students at NCR. The most top-notch mages and students look to you with a sense of reverence. Whether you knew it or not, you held the strings of the hearts of them all. With one single word, you could cause any of the Housewardens to level entire cities for you, if only to gain your approval. You held the strings of fate for them all, and your pain and suffering was enough to make the same Housewardens, and anybody else who knew you closely- or even in passing- unable to use their magic for weeks after your breakdown.
They just...couldn't seem to use it. It was as if their magic were broken.
When you ran out of breath, finally getting all of your anger out of your system, you inhaled shakily, putting trembling hands on the ground to steady yourself.
When you opened your eyes, the first thing you saw was a speckle of blood on the concrete below you, where your screams had caused your throat to crack and shred. You could see people in your peripheral vision, your friends, not one of them moving towards you.
Directly in front of you, looking as if he were about to make a run for it, was none other than Dire Crowley. You could see the sky behind him, dark and grey. Was it that color before?
"I-" You started, your voice cracking, but nonetheless heavy with emotion. You stood up slowly, your knees buckling at first, but eventually letting you stand up to your full height. You stood as tall as you could, your shoulders straight and your eyes focused straight ahead, drilling a hole through Crowley's head. Your face was wet from tears, and more were threatening to spill, but you didn't care about that right now.
"I'm done with you, Crowley," You spat, your voice holding a level of hatred you didn't know was possible. "I'm done working to make up for your shit. I'm done risking my life for you when I'm defenseless, when I'm stuck in this god-damn world because of you!" You held up an accusing finger, taking a step forward to jab it in his chest. He stepped back, but you stepped forward again, keeping the distance between you two even.
"I never wanted to be here, yet you treat me like I'm some sort of burden who showed up at your door- you force me to work, force me to be the therapist for children who need fucking help! How many overblotting students have I saved, huh? How many of those were ones you ran from, ones you refused to help with?! When have you ever been on my side? When have you ever stopped to think not of yourself, but me? What about ME, you worthless piece of shit?!"
You took another shaky breath, wiping the blood gathering on your lips with your free hand.
Crowley let out a small breath as you lowered your finger, and you turned around in a small circle to look at the crowd of students surrounding you. There were your friends, some looking concerned, other terrified. Grim was being held by Ace in a comforting gesture, the cat-like beast shaking. Some of the students had unreadable looks on their faces. Others looked confused.
"I'm done." You hissed, half to yourself, and half to the students. Although it was low enough so only those a few feet away could hear you speak, the word got around quickly enough, and the throng of students began whispering amongst themselves.
You ignored the offers of helps from your friends, and stormed off, back to the Ramshackle dorm, house of Nobody.
Ruled by Nobody.
︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶
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takes1 · 1 year ago
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p.2 bratty tsukishima x manager!reader enemies to lovers
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warnings. nsfw. m!masturbation at the end. midterms mentioned. minors DNI content. misinterpretation of emotions. tsukki not knowing how to handle a crush. enemies to lovers. or maybe enemies with benefits, i haven't decided yet. manager!reader. tsukki being so incredibly horny. tsukki not understanding facial expressions. sexual frustration. male masturbation + implied previous. kiyoko being a friend. yachi being a friend. 1.7k words notes. 3 more parts planned! ask to be added to the taglist if you don't want to miss one! links. PART ONE HERE. PART THREE . PART FOUR. FINAL PART. masterlist for mha. my ao3. masterlist for haikyuu
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Despite your iced latte being mostly just water by now, you still sucked it down in desperation to get every ounce of caffeine you could. Midterms were just around the corner and one of your most difficult classes involved writing a 10-page scientific paper.
You had the whole semester to do it, so the dread you felt now was the amalgamation of months' worth of opportunity that you could've and should've used to work on it.
Thankfully, you didn't have to churn the majority of this thing out alone.
"What the hell does ameliorate mean." Kiyoko asked, though her soft frustration was starting to sound more like a statement now.
Yachi took every opportunity she could to stop doing her work, including this one. For her, there was less pressure to do perfectly on her finals since she had another two years to get those top marks.
She scanned her laptop screen for a moment, lips perched on the lid of her strawberry refresher: "Ameliorate means... To... make something bad or unsatisfactory better."
Kiyoko muttered something about how it still didn't make sense. Of course it wouldn't- she was taking an organic chemistry course.
The plan as it stood now was to rot in this spot all day until hunger moved you, so you all made an event out of it by putting on something cute, grabbing some coffees and pastries from a cafe nearby, and settling into this local library.
It wasn't planned, but you all simultaneously chose to wear skirts and cute summer tops. The mutual reaction of humor helped ease the pain of having to study all day. Suffering together was preferable to suffering alone.
The chance finally came again to stretch your legs and find another vaguely relevant reference to add to your bibliography.
With a rewarding, careful stretch, you rose out of your chair and took your time walking up and down the aisles to find something to support the fifth theory you'd written about so far.
Midterms were one stressor, but you weren't afforded the privilege of having tunnel vision over it.
Qualifiers were just around the corner, and you had the Tokyo training camp to prepare a load of equipment and personnel logs for.
As you selected a thick novel from a shelf above your head, you let out a small sigh.
The front matter described a concept you could start to look into and fluff up to your liking for the paper. Your mind fell back to the team, and how you wanted to do well on these exams so you'd have less to worry about going to Tokyo.
The side of your face was growing warm, probably from the East-facing window to your left, so you raised the back of a cold hand to cool yourself down.
You were just deciding to take this book back when, in the process of dropping your hand, you caught a blur of blond hair and glasses in the corner of your eye.
Your stomach jolted, heart starting to race, and an uncontrollable surprise took over your features.
Tsukishima was sitting, leaned over a table on his elbows, his head twisted all the way to the side to look at you over his shoulder.
You quickly looked back to the shelf and sucked in a breath. God, that must've looked so lame- you regretted every millisecond of that reaction and prayed he wouldn't ever bring it up.
He hated you. You didn't want anything to do with him. There was no pleasant exchange to get out of saying hello, or even acknowledging each other. It's not like you were friends.
Why was he even here? You started to get worried, but realized that he did ride the same train back with you after practice in the evenings.
Now you were really remembering. He got off one stop before yours and always moved to create the most space possible between you. You usually didn't see him again until he got off. Even then, you didn't care enough to look for him anymore.
You glanced back to him, expecting to now have to speak to him after you'd exchanged a mutual acknowledgment of each other's presence.
He was staring. But... that wasn't exactly the right word for it.
He was distracted. You wondered if he knew who you were, because you'd never seen him stare at you for more than a few seconds.
His brow wasn't pinched like usual. It was relaxed- in fact, everything about him was relaxed. The way his head was held in his hand, the loose grasp on his pencil, the subtle part of his lips. The lazy, yet measured scan of his eyes.
There was a reddish tint at the tips of his ears and highest points of his cheeks. It was astoundingly easy to notice, since he was so fair-skinned.
A strong chill ran up your spine when he finally made eye contact with you. Even then, it took a glance down to the book clasped against your chest, then back up for him to really notice your gaze and stiffen right up.
That new side of him vanished in an instant. It was replaced with a brief, stone-cold glower before he turned back to his own midterm work.
On the stiff walk back to your table, you smoothed your skirt out and pulled on the edge a bit before sitting back down.
It took a minute of silent sitting to even begin to unpack what you felt.
"Do I look stupid?"
Yachi instantly piped up, "Of course not! You're very pretty!"
"You really shouldn't waste your breath asking," Kiyoko glanced up at you.
It was brief but it rested your immediate insecurities.
"Why?" Yachi, once again, wanted nothing more than to just hang out and talk.
Another surge of chills. It was sickening.
You put your head in your hands, elbows on the table. "Mm-mm, it's just-..." You thought to tell them, but held back at the last second, "I dunno."
Another big sigh and you were back to typing to take your mind off of it. You'd have plenty of time to see what this spun into once you were free from this academic prison. It was too confusing right now.
Kiyoko didn't read into it, but Yachi lingered until 1) it was obvious you simply didn't want to disclose and 2) an abnormally tall boy from school walked past your table. She watched him watch you on his way towards the exit.
Her eyes narrowed with keen intuition.
the keen intuition in question:
Kei felt himself practically melt against the closed door of his bedroom. Breathless from a difficult and quick walk home, he fumbled with the tie of his sweatpants and the lock on the door concurrently.
"Finally," He sighed with a desperate laugh, "Fuck..."
His bag hit the floor with a sharp and careless thump. He stepped over it and fell onto his back on his mattress, a long arm stretched toward his side table for some lotion.
It was useless trying to study after that. Library or home, it didn't matter unless he could fuck this one out.
This time he didn't have to stalk your Instagram to spark his imagination; it was already running rampant with filthy ideas of what he'd do to you in that short skirt.
An ignored, aching erection sprang out of his waistband as he pushed it down and out of the way.
Light grey sweatpants had (for the first time in his life) ended up being a shit idea. All he could worry about on the 20 minute walk back was if anyone could see the tip of his cock tucked up just under his shirt.
Every shirt was too short. Every pair of pants was too big in the middle.
His slippery hand was beautiful relief. He was quick to get himself lubricated, and quicker to pump in slow, twisting motions to the image of you reaching, reaching, reaching up to that book on your tippy toes.
All the worry in his tight brow washed away in crashing waves of steady-growing pleasure.
Soon he didn't care about the harrowing journey home, the threat of midterms, nor the growing dread of that training camp.
It was just you.
It felt like fate that he got the only chance anyone might ever have to see the curve of your ass just under the hem of your skirt. You were able to get that book all too quickly.
If everything were different, he would've gotten it for you. You would've thanked him, kissed him on the cheek- he would've pulled you in for a heated, raunchy kiss with a hand palming you closer. He would've savored the view of you spread on the table for him -homework long forgotten- and his massive hand over your mouth to keep you quiet. It was a library, after all.
He seethed and stalled for a moment--, "a-ahh- Mm..."
His cock twitched hard with the need to cum, but he stopped just soon enough.
An oversized hand was holding the base; he looked at his other dry one, then closed his eyes in an eager but fruitless attempt to visualize just how they'd look on your thighs. Fuck, anywhere at this point.
Just one touch, that's all he wanted. He never let himself get close enough to even consider it, but my god, the internal struggle he made to stay away was commendable.
His tight, lightly sweaty stomach flexed with effort as he slowed down again.
You were so quick to switch up when it came to him. He could tell he had a special place in your heart, the way your lips pursed into a small frown and your eyes narrowed when he tested you.
It was out-of-this-world cute from his vantage point. A smile might just kill him.
"Mmm, fu-ck," He croaked, mind circling back to today.
His chest swelled with a shaky inhale- he smirked at the thought of you finding out about his terrible secret, how you would punish him for his unprofessional behavior. You were so pretty when you got mad.
The breath caught in his throat. He wasn't even thinking about the skirt when he finally came all over his stomach. Just that pretty face of yours did it for him.
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writtenbythemoonandstars · 28 days ago
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Camping
Part 4 of the First Date series
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Possible content warnings without spoiling too much include: descriptions of injuries and medical procedures and discussion of past sexual events.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
1.8k words
---
Robby has always loved camping. The smell of pine trees and sap, of fire and smoke. The serene sounds of birds, crackling fires. When he was a kid he'd camp by the ocean and the waves crashing were always enough to put him to sleep at night. 
The taste of bug spray bitter on his tongue as he accidentally breathes it in. "Honey, I think you've scared off enough bugs. Put it down." His voice soft amused. When he'd heard she hadn’t ever been camping before Robby quickly booked them a site the first weekend they were both free. 
"I'm allergic to mosquitoes you know." She sighs, spraying her arm one last time before setting it down. "Not like… deathly but I don’t want to break out in hives." 
"I don't think anyone within a hundred mile radius will come in contact with any bugs thanks to you." He teases, laughing. Raising his hands in surrender when he gets a look.
"Maybe I forgot to mention that just because I haven't ever been camping before doesn't mean I felt like I was missing out on anything. It's great that you're Bear Grylls or whatever but I'm meant to sleep in an actual bed. Not like… a sleeping bag on the dirt." He just continues to chuckle at her. Not taking any offence. 
"You'll have fun I promise." 
There are a lot of things you don't say in the ER or as a doctor in general. Things like, "Seems quiet" or "calm" or make promises which you have no control over. 
Which is probably why two hours later it starts to pour rain. Making it difficult for Robby to start a fire. Seeing his… girlfriend? Is that what he calls her now? They haven't really talked about it but he's not seeing anyone else and she's been coming over at least three times a week for the past four months. 
Anyway, she's drowning in the jacket he fortunately packed. Causing him to be the one that's soaking wet. "Is this how I looked when I showed up for our first date?" She asks. Amused as she observes him work. 
"Better." Robby replies, winking when he catches her rolling her eyes. 
He ties a tarp high enough it wouldn't catch fire but also cover the pit from the rain. 
"That’s really hot." She says. Resting her head in her hands, watching him. "It's so…" She shrugs, not thinking of the right word, "manly?"
"Yeah?" Robby stands. Moving closer, his hands sliding around her hips. "You like it?" 
"Mhm." Nodding, eyes closing as he kisses up her neck. 
"You taste like bug spray." He comments after pulling back.
"I used an entire bottle before I got out of my car. You can imagine what that smells like." Robby laughs. He moves to sit down on the log next to her.
"I may hate it out here but I can see the appeal. The rain, the fire, it's all very calming." She nods. 
"We'd camp every year, sometimes more than once, when I was a kid." Robby tells her. He feels her nod and lay her head on his shoulder. "Grandma was a really big fan of Survivor." He adds, "recreational camping is obviously a lot different than the tropical survival they do on the show but sometimes she'd make my brother and I do puzzles or eat rice and fish out here."
"Oh yeah?" She snorts, "Grandma has taste." Robby feels her nod. "Watching Survivor was probably one of the only times my family and I got along growing up. Probably because we were all sitting watching tv instead of talking to each other." 
"Are you my girlfriend?" He can't help but blurt. The thought on his mind for a while now.
"What do you mean?" Her head tilts up, "w1hat else would I be?" 
"I don't know… I- I just… we hadn't ever talked about it. Officially. I didn't know if you wanted to put a label on it." Robby says honestly. 
"Michael." Looking at him in the eyes. "You were the first man to eat me out. That's not nothing." He rolls her eyes as she laughs. "I'm serious though. I'm not seeing anyone else." 
"I'm not either." 
"Good. Then we can label it." She nods. "Boyfriend." 
"Girlfriend." Then he leans in to kiss her. The fire burns on it's own while Robby pulls her into the tent…
The next morning Robby wakes her up early. As if they hadn’t stayed up late the night before. She groans. "Isn't camping supposed to be relaxing? Waking up at-" Checking her phone, "5? Jesus, Michael." 
"This is the whole reason I brought you out here. Come on." He throws her a jacket and crawls out of the tent to wait for her. It's the excitement in his tone movements that has her moving, though mumbling complaints about it. 
"It's only a mile baby." Seeing her frown and the protest on the tip of her tongue. "I'll carry you if it's too much." 
She rolls her eyes. "With that back?" He just waves her off.
Her mood improves though when she sees why they got up before daylight. Seeing the sunrise from the top of this hill after a mile- an uphill mile she wants to add that Robby conveniently "left out". 
If only Robby remembered that due to the rain last night the dirt trail would be incredibly muddy. On the walk down both of them shared stories about work. Robby thought about her question, "Have you ever had any patients where they stayed totally calm in a situation where they should not be?" 
"I had this guy come in with a nail in his hand. Like, straight through the palm. Kept joking that now he could finally get out of helping his brother move this weekend. Meanwhile I’m trying to keep a straight face while removing an actual hardware-store nail from a human hand. It missed all the major nerves and tendons by millimeters. I stitched him up, wrapped it, and told him to avoid power tools for at least a week. And definitely not to pick up any couches-" He turns when he finally realized there were no sounds of footsteps behind him anymore. 
Where did she go? One minute she was right behind him, grabbing the water from his backpack, and now…
"Michael?" Her voice broken, he nearly didn't hear it. 
She'd fallen down off the side of the hill, laying at the bottom. Slipped in the mud and just tumbled all the way down. 
"Fuck. Hold on. I'm coming." He has to be careful getting to the bottom where she is. 
"Did you hit your head?" Robby reaches her quickly. Swiftly checking over her condition. He doesn't hear an answer right away and snaps his head to her face. "Baby? Did you hit your head?" Robby pulls a pen light from the first aid kit in his backpack. 
"No, but your water bottle hit me." She picks it up. Her eyes are normal and reactive to light. Despite the metal bottle to the head he rules out concussion for now. 
There's no blood, which is honestly a miracle, except for a small scratch on her chin. Doesn't even need stitches. 
"Michael?" Her voice strained. Nervous. He looks up from where he's securing a small bandage to her chin. But she's not looking at him. Following her eyes… his heart drops. 
"My ankle isn't supposed to look like that right?" She quickly grabs on to the pocket of his jacket. 
"No it is not." Robby can tell it's fractured. 
"Fuck…" She replies slowly. "Do you have to like- uhm- like set it? Or Whatever?" Both of them still looking at her foot.
"Yes I am." He already pulling out his phone, despite not having any service he should still be able to contact emergency services. 
"Wait-" Her eyes wide, holding the jacket he shucked off, "this is going to hurt?" Well, he didn't shove it in her mouth for no reason. 
"Yeah honey." Robby nods, the expression on his face telling her it physically pains him to have to do this. "But only for a second. I promise." A kiss is pressed to her forehead. 
He can see the apprehension on her eyes. "I'll get you the biggest margarita or ice cream sundae or honestly whatever the fuck you want baby." Hating the situation they're in. "You're so brave… and strong-"  
"Holy- Fuck. Okay." She nods. "Giant fucking margarita… Count to three?" 
He nods except he doesn't want her to tense when he gets to three. So, he says, "One. Two-"
The crack and pop is sharp in the otherwise quiet morning in the woods. 
The jacket sleeve falls from her mouth as she gasps for air. Choking which turning into gagging and spitting up some of her granola bar from an hour ago. Robby rubs circles across her back.  
"I thought we said three." She snaps though not necessarily mad at him. Just in pain. 
He moves his hands up to her shoulder. Letting her grip his wrist tightly. Leaning in to his lap. "I didn't want you to tense up." Kissing the back of her hand. 
"Paramedics will be here in twenty minutes. But I have to get you out of here." He splints and ties up her ankle before helping on to his back.
"What about-" He shakes his head. "I'll be fine." Waving her off. 
It's about halfway when he feels himself seizing up. "T-tell me a story-" going back to what they had been doing on the walk down the hill. 
She rubs his shoulders the best she can, knowing this isn't easy for him to be carrying her like this. "I had a client a few months ago who I hadn't talked to in a while. I saw her email name had changed and I asked if she had recently gotten married-" She stops talking when he stops walking, needing a break. The tension tight in his back. "Keep going." He nods to her. 
"She told me she'd been recently divorced." He starts to walk again so she continues. "It got so much worse after that and it was already awkward… I don't even remember what sparked her to tell me but she said she caught her husband cheating on her with her best friend.."
"What did you do?" They're nearly back to camp. 
"I told her I was sorry and after we finished the meeting for the day I pawned her off on a coworker and never spoke to her again." The embarrassment of what happened and the guilt of cutting her off after their awkward encounter creeps in from time to time but she forces herself to push it down. 
The paramedics arrive soon after Robby sets her down carefully then stretches his back. He watches her sleep on the ambulance ride to the nearest hospital after she was given some pain medicine. 
A boot for 6 weeks and some physical therapy. 
"You know…" She looks over at Robby slowly. A little loopy. "I had a lot of fun camping." 
That makes him laugh. "Did you?" 
"Mhm. We should do it again." Nodding. 
"I'll ask you again when you're not on drugs." He softens his laugh to a light chuckle. Pressing a kiss in her hair. 
"Okay…" She whispers before falling asleep again. 
---
Let me know what you think!
Also, btw, I know there hasn't been any mention of Robby having a brother but I added him in just for the sake of the story he was telling idk
Unedited...
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anantaru · 2 years ago
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DAY 12 — COCKWARMING
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kinktober 2023. — masterlist | ao3
𖧡 — including — heizou, alhaitham, baizhu
𖧡 — warnings — fem! reader, cockwarming, tit play, teasing you to the brim like staaaaaahp, a sprinkle of brat taming because why not, mean genshin boys
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𖧡 — HEIZOU
"ah- i could get used to this."
and needless to say, it feels good, largely to heizou though— especially when he shadows his skilled fingers over your bare chest because he knows it'll drive you insane, his hand slowly settling down on top of your breasts, squeezing and massaging the mounds before groping your tits, together with his cock slipping past the solidness of your slit— throbbing, pressing and stretching inside.
you cling to him for your dear life, the fulfillment of his erection jammed within the bounds of you swelling pussy, candidly battering your cunt when you attempt to press down on his hips, or perhaps move for that matter, instead whimpering sweetly as heizou stills your hips with a solid arm whilst the other pinches your aroused nipple and tugs on it ever so slightly.
you pout out deliberately, yearning for him so terribly you cannot help yourself but moan into his neck, "heizou.." you say, stumbling over your words, "don't tease me now.. please." and it's not necessarily something your boyfriend would consider teasing— especially since in his opinion, you should be utterly aware on how his real taunting looked like.
in the span of no time, it had gotten to the point where it became a game between you both, one which he would most likely end up winning the moment he shushes your cute sniffles with a kiss, idly shuffling in his seat before unintentionally (it was very much intentional) moving his cock and thrusting up hard against one cloying, pressing, spot.
"fuck— well, you faced worse before, haven't you?" his words, although dripping of artificial consideration, vibrate all the way from your pouty lips, to your sensitive nipples being played with, to your wet messy core slicking up his buried shaft, shortly gushing around it so much that a white, thick ring of whites took shape around the base of his cock— he’s still entirely buried in you, with that single thrust hitting you like a sudden hot fever dashing on top of your shoulders.
heizou continues to keep you pressed against his cock, one hand long since branding the flesh of your juddering hips— and it's almost bruising to you, long fingers plunging into the skin hard enough to make you wince out and beg again, only to be met with a cocked up brow, a wet smirk and an even deeper throb of his erection.
your quivering body was exceedingly past recovering by now and you helplessly swallow down a bubbling sob from your throat when he grinds inside you again, yet with barely any strength aiding the move— the stiffened veins of his erection melting with your walls that the combination of those very sensations heizou brought forth focused on intermittently inching you into madness.
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𖧡 — ALHAITHAM
your thighs clamp against each side of alhaitham's hips while one arm freely closes around your waist, the last thing he'd want is for you to move and disturb his peace— whilst the other, well, was occupied in holding a book he was currently reading, adventurous eyes deciphering each and every little letter printed on top, eagerly memorizing and pondering about a much deeper, more crucial interpretation behind the portrayed story.
yet you're taking him just like he needed you to, raw and hard, while he barely gifts you any attention. ugh, some sort of punishment coming from the scribe? might be, but you knew alhaitham very well and that his mind simply wasn't wired that way, instead he probably thought that it would cost him far less effort to put two into one, pleasure and knowledge, as he referred to it, stitched together with both sides unable to slip past his grip.
it's mostly exhausting around your legs, specifically the insides of your thighs that began to stiffen and ache, forcing you to taste subtle early signs of lightheadedness from your desperate attempts to not move nor clench down on him so strongly.
another breathy gasp, and you let him know that you're obviously struggling with his cock being way too big and heavy to remain in that way without moving at the very least— a warm puddle of your arousal exuding from your hole and divulging at the foundation of his shaft, sending droplets of the mixture on the office floor.
"please, oh, please." you whine, suddenly flustered when you realize you just blurted those frenzied pleas out loud, establishing them right against the shell of his ears, his headphones since long disposed of and placed on the table next to you— whilst beyond questioning, besides the fact that alhaitham was wholly absorbed into the fantasy novel in his hand, he'd never pass up on an opportunity to listen to your short-lived whines, the cute weeps or the loud thuds of your heart beat reverberating against his chest.
"already?" he speaks softly before you meet his eyes, surprisingly enough his pupils were blown wide and you cannot even fathom this level of discipline when it probably hurt him too to not move at least an inch up and down your fluttering hole. "i barely started this chapter."
"then read faster!" you interrupt him, no, practically snap at him, nervously licking your lips as your hands run over his cheeks to make him kiss you, his raw erection throbbing at the bold move as he for once redirects his entire attention from that pestering, bothersome, annoying book in his hand that you would love to just dispose of entirely.
"okay, okay," the man shuffles around, "you better make it worth my time then." and he teases you, always, then drinks up a trembling moan that spumes up on your mouth as his quick tongue darts out to run around your lips and wet them with his saliva, your throat aching in excitement for what's about to come. 
alhaitham bites back a groan when you swiftly mould your walls over his cock, needful and slobbering your arousal once more— you're so soft there, ah, it never fails to amaze him. but to get himself on top of things again, most importantly to not lose himself in you, he traces your back up and down with his palm before teasingly rutting into your wet sex, it's barely perceivable to you and maybe that's what would ultimately tip you over the edge if alhaitham does not stop those cruel tactics.
although, pondering over his honesty, it's quite cute when you're frustrated and bitter because of a situation he put you in, or how much harder it was to stay disciplined in focusing on his book when a coat of a heavenly expression litters across your bristling cheeks— it just feels so dreamy to be inside you.
alhaitham might just look past the little shifts of your body that you sneaked between pauses, despite them offering you the tiniest teases and moments of friction on your overflowing hole, and yes, your leg muscles were screaming for some sort of pleasure, regardless keeping yourself still and happy to take his perfectly shaped length.
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𖧡 — BAIZHU
you brace yourself, without further questioning settling on baizhu's lap before lining your slit up with his leaking cock— his pre like a translucent film sheer on top of the rosy tip.
and for the most part, this scenario appeared to be quite familiar to you— at the end of the day, your boyfriend could never be entirely satisfied when you ride him for hours, he needs it without pause. it warms his heart when you’re on top— as if you were somehow claiming him, his groans exuberant with lust, a velvet tune on your ears so exciting as you watch how he succumbs to the touch of being engulfed by a warm, soft cunt.
this time, although, something didn't align with previous scenarios— because the second you had pushed him in, touched up his shaft with your wetness, baizhu instantly places both hands on your moving hips, breathily laughing in both bliss and an ulterior emotion as he squeezes the flesh of your ass, your pretty noises almost making him decide against doing this right now.
of course, you try to lift your hips so you could bounce up and down, his cockhead snugly enclosed and piercing your swelling flesh as he spread you apart by his girth, your body desperately clinging against his chest and it's only then, when you realize what's going on, your hot, breathless moans garnering his gentle attention.
"uh?" you tilt your head to the side, then wince when his cock reaches impossibly deep and nudges over your sensitivity, the infused tingles of that singular drag holding you captive, intimately trapped within his arms, "ah— is something wrong?"
"no, nothing." baizhu coos, mouthing a wet spot over your jawline before slotting his lips over your own. you fall into a kind of daze when he keeps you strong against his thudding cock, your hands on his shoulders when you press your nails into the clothed skin, breathing deep, slow, at least trying but your attempts immediately fall flat when he offers your body some teases of friction.
"is something supposed to be wrong?" you're sweating at his words, your leg muscles screaming when you gaze at him through confused, widened eyes, "i- i'm not sure," you babble, the shivers in your lower area doing everything in their limited power to keep the pleasure going for as long as possible, anything to make you feel at least something but baizhu wouldn't let you.
"think harder, darling." he grins, letting the exposed warmth of your cunt wrap around his cock as he lifts you up, "is this better?" no, of course not, you panic, this was even worse and you whine at the lost fullness, leaning against him to wrap your arms around his neck, his cock head still nudging at your slit.
"it's not, it's not, it's not.." you can hardly move, and baizhu swallows down your mewls with a lick into your mouth, nibbling at your bottom lip before smirking when he feels how you're rolling your hips, or at least, try— despite that, you're being met with strong resistance again, wondering how someone such as baizhu, who was perceived as a frail man, suddenly claimed such sturdy force in his arms.
"easy now.." he whispers cruelly, and you can practically taste his amusement on your tongue.
"maybe then "i'll move."
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©2023 anantaru's kinktober do not repost, copy, translate, modify
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thatdammchickennugget · 5 days ago
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can you do headcanons for the marauders for their love languages ??
of couse, love! god, I feel like I haven't written headcanons in so long, I hope this doesn't suck. includes james, remus, sirius and peter.
Marauders Love Language Headcanons
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James
How he gives love: Words of Affirmation, Physical Touch, Quality Time
James loves like a lightning storm — big, bright, impossible to ignore. He shouts compliments across rooms, ruffles your hair in front of professors, slings an arm around you like it’s your natural place in the world. You won a game of chess? She’s a bloody genius! You sneezed? Even your sneezes are charming! Every achievement, no matter how small, gets full celebration. It’s not performative — he’s just that proud. Of you. All the time. He shows love like he’s worried you’ll forget it unless he keeps reminding you.
He touches constantly — not out of obligation, but because he doesn't see a reason not to. He’ll pull you onto his lap even when there’s room on the bench, press a kiss to your hair mid-sentence, link pinkies when you walk side by side. Physical affection is a default with James — unless you push him away, he’ll always pull you closer.
How he receives love: Quality Time
James wants you to be in it with him. In the stands at Quidditch, in the joke, in the trouble. He feels closest to you when you’re part of his whirlwind — when he says “come on!” and you do. Sit beside him while he’s working on a prank, walk with him to class even when it’s not your way. He’ll grin like he’s won something. It’s not about doing anything special — it’s about choosing to be where he is. That’s what makes him feel loved.
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Remus
How he gives love: Acts of Service, Quality Time
Remus doesn’t love loudly. He’s the kind of person who fixes your scarf while you talk, refills your tea without being asked, and quietly leaves a bar of chocolate on your desk when he knows you’ve had a hard day. He won’t say much about it. He might not say anything at all. But the scarf stays in place, the tea is warm, and the chocolate has your favorite kind of filling. That’s Remus. He pays attention, quietly and thoroughly. If he notices you’re cold, you’ll find an extra jumper in your drawer. If you mention offhand that your quill’s been leaking, he’ll swap it out before the next class. He doesn’t make a show of it, doesn’t want thanks — the helping is the affection.
He prefers quiet proximity to deep conversation. He’d rather be sitting beside you, both reading different books, than spilling emotions out across a table. His “I love you” sounds like, You should go to bed, I’ll finish this for you. Like, You can have the last biscuit. Like, I’m here, if you want me — but never, you have to.
How he receives love: Words of Affirmation (but subtle)
Remus doesn’t know what to do when you look him in the eye and tell him he’s wonderful. He’ll smile tight and change the subject. But if you mutter it, distracted — “You’re so good to me,” while wrapping a blanket around your shoulders — he’ll go very still. He won’t answer. He might pretend he didn’t hear. But he did. That quiet praise? It matters more than you know. Call him “steady” or “clever” in passing, and he’ll hold onto it for weeks. You may forget you ever said it — he won’t.
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Sirius
How he gives love: Gift Giving, Physical Touch
Sirius’s gifts don’t always make sense — a leather bracelet with a skull on it, a mug that says Bite Me, a quill he swears belonged to a dark wizard. But they’re all from him, chosen because they reminded him of you. He wraps them in old newspaper and tosses them at you like it’s no big deal. If you like it, he shrugs and goes pink. If you don’t, he shrugs harder and pretends he doesn’t care. But he does. He really, really does.
He’s all over you in public — throws himself dramatically across your lap, head on your stomach, legs over your knees. He’ll braid your hair when he’s bored and lean his full weight against you in the hallway. But when you initiate it — lace your fingers with his, brush his cheek — he freezes. Like he wasn’t expecting it. Like part of him still doesn’t think he’s supposed to be loved back.
How he receives love: Physical Touch (but gently), Words of Affirmation (sincerely)
Sirius wants to be touched, but he doesn’t always know how to ask. Touch him first — gently. Brush his hair behind his ear when he’s reading, wrap an arm around his waist when he’s ranting. He’ll blink, maybe go quiet, but he won’t pull away. He’s listening. He’s taking notes. Tell him he did something right, that he matters — and do it like you mean it. No sarcasm, no jokes. Just: I’m glad you’re here. He won’t believe you right away. Say it again anyway.
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Peter
How he gives love: Acts of Service, Gift Giving
Peter is the friend who notices. The one who brings you your favorite snack without asking, who saves you a seat without being told, who stays up late fixing something broken even though he’s not very good at it. His love is practical, understated, deeply felt. He doesn’t grandstand — he supports. He fixes things. He remembers. He watches how you take your tea and starts making it before you even sit down.
He gives gifts that you didn’t even know you needed — a new quill because yours is fraying, a pair of socks because your feet are always cold. He doesn’t make a big deal of it. He just hands it over, a little shy, like he hopes it’s good enough.
How he receives love: Quality Time, Gentle Touch
Peter glows when you ask him to join something — when you say I want you there and mean it. He doesn’t need to be the center of attention. He just wants to be chosen. Sit beside him at lunch. Invite him on your errands. Let him tag along. He’ll smile so wide it hurts. And if you ever initiate touch — lean your head on his shoulder, link arms — he’ll blush and try to act casual. He won’t pull away. He might even lean back. He doesn’t always say thank you with words. But you’ll see it in how he looks at you, like you made his whole day just by noticing him.
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penguin--nipples · 5 months ago
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truly nothing has affected me the way that reading the wicked years this past week is affecting me I have a million disorganized thoughts and I'm only partway through son of a witch:
Glinda and Elphaba's relationship is so much more fleshed out in the books than it is in the musical - the yearning and the pining and Elphaba showing up at the cloister of St glinda over and over again
Elphaba has two soulmates and that affects me deeply what do you mean someone who feels like they could never be loved has two soulmates
Why the fuck did Gregory include a line about Fiyero shitting his guts out right before dying?? Did the guy at the bar poison him?? Did the guy at the bar purposefully show him the bears being killed/hurt and then poison him?
Elphaba and her son both being bisexual disasters is actually my favorite thing
Elphaba and Fiyeros deaths both occur somewhat 'offscreen' and there is no evidence of their bodies
BOQ in the book is such a loveable character I despised him in the musical
Glinda is absolutely bat shit but also some kind of intuitive genius, the way she sees Fiyero after a decade and immediately deduces he's fucking somebody and minutes later says something along the lines of "send my love to elphie". And the way she interacts with Liir for the first time is also absolutely insane, but she also instinctively knows by the end of her conversation with him that he is Elphaba's son
Why is Nanny immortal? And how did Chistery learn to talk so well with her as the only human around?
As much as I hated watching Liir get bullied I loved the chapters at kiamo ko with sarima/her sisters and Nanny randomly showing up to terrorize the group, nothing like a found family of mostly women
I understand the queer reading of Elphaba's character obviously, but I don't understand why people think she is intersex. The book literally states "Only after a second and third rub was it clear that the child was indeed feminine. Perhaps in labor some bit of organic effluvia had become caught and quickly dried in the cloven place." - I always read this more as an acknowledgement of what Sarima explains later on as hot and cold anger and Elphaba having both. I feel like this is more of a trans allegory or that Elphaba has elements of being male and female (2 Spirit?)/a dissolution of gender, than her being intersex. and yet this rumour persists among discussion posts and boards, making it feel like a real life propaganda trail for the book since I've seen it said in the context of "woahhh the book is so much freakier than the movie omg". Although I guess it could be androgen insensitivity syndrome as well
What the FUCK is Yackle? She is described as the opposite of a guardian angel but idk what that means
Did gelphie fuck or not I'm so confused, they "spent a night together" and I see people saying they canonically had sex and maybe it's the nature of the book enjoying switching perspectives every time something interesting happened but I feel like they didn't? Or it's something I haven't read yet?
I feel like Liir becomes an audience surrogate when he goes into Southstairs guided by Shell - this is genuinely how it felt reading the books sometimes, he saw Shell be sketchy multiple times before putting it together like 'wait are you having sex with them???' which is basically me every time Gregory implied a sex scene subtly, making me not super sure if it happened or not
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sen-ya · 1 year ago
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Sen's Important Info Post
Post last updated 10/29/24
Hey I'm Sen and I draw One Piece too much! I am terrible at keeping things easy to find, turns out when ur job is project management you don’t want to also do it in ur down time. My current theme is following the dopamine, keeping it as fun as it can be for me to draw. Below the cut is information on the different AUs & serializations I've got going on right now :^)
Important Links
[How to use Airtable]
[Sen's Digital Comic Book] - a database of every comic I've made that is woefully not updated often I am sorry. I gotta work on a better system for easy viewing.
[Life After Digital Comic Book] - a database of every page of Life After
[See Comics Early on Ko-Fi!]
[Life After Info Post] - Life After is currently on hiatus!
Posting Schedule
Thursday - Serialized Comics (current: Family AU//Forgetful)
Universe: Main Timeline
Comics that belong to this timeline are meant to follow through the events of canon, many of them were written while I was actively reading and didn't know what would happen next! Every comic that receives this tag happens in the same universe, so they may refer to each other in both plot-important and not important ways. These comics are largely LuLaw but include sprinkles of Heart Pirates (in general and as family), ZoSan, and general shenanigans.
Serializations:
Getting Together - Will they/won't they? They will, but they're gonna be stupid about it. Anything tagged into this series you can assume they haven't established that they're romantically interested in each other.
Established LuLaw - Two idiots in love. Anything tagged with this series you can assume they're together. They may not refer to each other as "boyfriend" or "partner" but whatever it is that's going on is clear to the two of them and that's what matters.
Law Loses - Most comics in this series deal with the aftermath of Winner Island. Law feels like a curse.
Goofs Only - These comics don't require serialization. They're just some good fun. If they include LawLu/LuLaw, they'll also be tagged as either "Getting Together" or "Established" so you have context for their reactions.
The Heart Bros - Law, Bepo, Penguin, and Shachi found each other as kids. Comics in this series act as glimpses into their time growing up and other brotherly interactions. This is noncompliant with the Law novel. Once they form the Heart Pirates, they consider each other brothers.
ZoSan - I don't draw these two a lot anymore, so this series is just a general ZoSan category!
Heart Pirate Shenanigans - I went all in on Heart Pirates Week 2024 and wrote a bunch of comics about the various crew members! Leaving this as an open series for when I inevitably fall down another Heart Pirate rabbit hole.
Universe: Older/Family AU
Comics that belong to this timeline are meant to follow through the events of canon, many of them were written while I was actively reading and didn't know what would happen next! Every comic that receives this tag happens in the same universe, so they may refer to each other in both plot-importanComics in this universe take place anywhere from 7 - 30 years post canon. Mostly LuLaw with sprinkles of other shenanigans. You can assume events from the main timeline are canon in this AU.
Serializations:
Accidents Happen - Law gets a cold and stops running a few effects that he'd taken for granted.
Getting Married - Did you know if two pirate captains want to get married, they can just say they're married?
Extras - This series is for posts that offer context/additional information about what's going on in the AU
Family Fluff - These are a series of comics where the focus is on Law and/or Luffy as a parent.
Forgetful - Law gets hit by a devil fruit that makes him forget everything that's happened since just before Marineford.
Get back to it - After spending some time on Zou in Rocy's first 18 months, it's time for Luffy & Law to get back to pirating.
Universe: The Worst Timeline
Comics in this universe branch off of the main timeline around Whole Cake/early Wano. These comics may refer to earlier 'main timeline' events, but what happens in them is so terrible I've refused to make them part of my own personal canon. Sometimes it's just too temping to make them suffer :^)
Serializations:
Rightfully Worried - This series is an AU in which Luffy gets the absolute shit kicked out of him in Whole Cake and when he arrives on Wano Law has to save his life. It's not the first time he's performed surgery on him, but it is the first time he's had to since he's cared so much about his patient.
The Worst Wake-Up Call - During an intense battle, Law makes a decision. The ones who love him deal with the aftermath.
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