#I have so many bills coming up cause I'm trying to get my doctor shit done while I have insurance

[yoshistory]

Fuuuuuuuuck today was awful .... I went to the doctor and after that tried getting my lamp fixed at the lamp shop and they looked at it and was like. Yeah that's unfixable. Those parts just don't exist anymore, sorry.

Went outside and my car wouldn't start and I had to run around asking for a jump (lamp people were cool about my car chilling there for a second) and it rained on me a lot and then I went to jiffy lube and they drove me down the street to help me and tried jumping it but it wouldn't work.

And THEN they were like "wait. hang on" and hit my starter with a stick while i started it and was like "yeah your starter is OLD.. Go to this garage down the road they'll help you"

and the garage looked at my car and was like "ummmm.... that looks so bad I'm respectfully not touching that. Sorry"

It could've been WAY worse and I made it home safe after this buuuuut... I have no clue if my car will start so I can go to work tomorrow. I don't have anyone around to hit my car while I start it ... >>''

[savage-rhi]

I'm very much a, "fuck yeah and fuck you, I don't need validation! I'm me, cunts!" kinda fella, but sometimes I could use support.

[hinatastinygiant]

Chapter Seven

Mendax

Pairing: Haikyuu!! x Fem!Reader

previous | next | 2099

ONE WEEK LATER

Kuroo and Tsukishima have made a habit of going fishing every other day around noon. It was obviously Kuroo's idea, but Tsukishima agrees to tag along just to make sure Kuroo doesn't run off with the fishing pole and bait. Or at least that's what he tells you.

When they're gone, you get a bit of time alone with Bokuto. You usually spend this time changing his bandages, cleaning the wound, or something to that extent. Today, however, he had asked if the two of you could go for a walk instead. You won't go far from the bus, just around the plot of land you've sectioned off for yourself. You agree and take a walk around the outside of your little garden.

"I used to be a college student before the country shut down," he admits to you with a sigh, "but I ended up dropping out 'cause my grades were shit. I spent too much time training for the sports team I was on but eventually, I was forced to quit that, too. I was about to get a job instead when the outage happened. I just wanted to support my family in any way I could. Besides, I needed to do somethin' about my loans."

"That sounds rough, I sure know about those loans, too," you nod as you walk slowly beside him.

"Yeah, but I think maybe it's a good thing the outage happened. It gave me a chance to start over in a place where I don't need to worry about those things," he sighs.

You smile softly as you think about what he has said. A few patients have said that to you before as well. You suppose for some people they are better in a world where they don't have money collectors, debt, bills to pay, or any of the other worries common in the time before the outage and the rich people fled the country.

"What about you?" Bokuto asks, pulling you out of your thoughts.

"Well, like I told you before, I was a doctor before everything happened."

"But aren't you like super young?" he asks, trying not to be rude with his question.

You laugh at his attempt to be so polite while also asking your age. "I've always been a year younger than everyone in all my classes. It just happened that way, I'm not special or anything like that."

Bokuto smiles at you. "You're more special than you think. Don't know many people so willing to go out of their way for patients in a world like this one. I don't know what I'd do without you let alone all the other people you've helped before me. I'm sure they'd agree."

"Thanks for that," you smile. "It's nice to hear you feel that way."

"Any time you want to talk, I'll be here. I'm not planning on leaving anyway," he grins kindly.

"You could," you grin back devilishly, "but you wouldn't get very far."

"That almost makes you sound like you're keeping me here against my will. You're not planning on killing me, are you?" he hums curiously.

"Not yet but maybe if I get too attached to our talks then I won't want to let you go," you laugh.

KUROO'S P.O.V.

Tsukishima and I are coming back from the lake with a few fish in the freezer that Y/N lets us borrow for our trips. We hold onto opposite ends, sharing the weight, as we walk back to our base.

"It's nice that Y/N lets us borrow all her things," I say with a smile at the thought of her generosity, especially after I told her how I was in jail.

"She trusts us," Tsukishima nods.

I smirk when I see that look in his eyes like he knows more than Bokuto or I do. But he did meet her the same day as us so I don't know what his deal is. "Oh? You think she trusts you, Tsukishima?" 

"I think Y/N trusts me enough to do simple tasks like go fishing in the lake but I don't think she'd trust me if I held a gun to her head," he explains.

"Ha! You really think you could do something like that?" I continue to push him.

"What are you implying?" he then questions me.

"Nothing," I shrug. "Just that you were supposed to leave the day we met, right? So what made you stick around?"

"Y/N has a good garden, location, and a bus. What more do I need to say?"

"If I didn't know better I'd think you're staying for her," I admit my thoughts to him.

Tsukishima says no remark, but when we come out of the forest we see Y/N and Bokuto near the garden laughing about something. Tsukishima pauses and puts down his half of the freezer. I stop beside him.

"You're ridiculous. A person would have to be insane to have feelings for someone in a situation like this," he scoffs.

"All the best people are crazy, though," I grin. "Does that answer the thought I can see you pondering?"

Tsukishima looks at me and shakes his head before picking up the container of fish and continuing to walk again. I go along with him, still holding the opposite side, and make our way towards the bus.

"You better make your move soon then."

Later that evening, we all enjoy a good dinner together outside in the new lawn chairs we bought from our trip to Walmart. I wanted to go to Dick's Sporting Goods but Y/N just rolled her eyes at me and so did Tsukishima. Neither of them took me seriously. But apparently it was 'too far away'.

"Well, I'm going to the lake to wash off," Y/N sighs as she stands up. She walks onto the bus and returns a few short minutes later with a towel and a change of clothes before walking away. The three of us watch as she walks off.

"So what were you two talking about before?" I ask Bokuto once Y/N disappears beneath the trees.

"Life," he shrugs, "before all of this."

"Hm," I nod. "And what's your opinion of her?"

"I couldn't imagine where I'd be without her," he admits.

"Dead. Run over. On the side of the road decaying," Tsukishima mutters. I nudge him and shake my head to show my disapproval, but luckily Bokuto doesn't seem to hear him. He's too lost in thought talking about her.

"She's a goddamn good doctor, too!" Bokuto remarks proudly. "If this was in the before I'd love to take her out on a nice date, let her meet my friends, all that stuff!"

I grin at his comment. Now we're finally getting somewhere interesting. "And then? Would you really do that with your doctor?"

Bokuto smiles back but for once he doesn't actually open his big mouth. Tsukishima, instead, clears his throat and pipes up before he gets any more details he doesn't want to hear.

"How much longer until you're feeling better to go without the crutches?" he asks Bokuto.

"Two more weeks," a blissful response is given.

Tsukishima sighs and shakes his head. I laugh at the interaction. I knew tagging along with these three would be a good time.

previous | next | 2099

Taglist: @isentsworld

[nachotrash]

ANOTHER EDITION OF INCORRECT QUOTES

ft: @catchmewiddershins @paradise-creator @elektrosonix @lilikags @todd-the-phrog and my irl bestie

Lili: I think I'm falling for you.

Anna: Then get up.

Anna: I dare you to kiss the next person who walks into this room.

Pauline: Screw that, I’m not kissing any of you.

*Wid walks in*

Pauline: Fine, I’ll do it. Rules are rules you know.

Sara: Are you an F5 key? Because that ass is refreashing.

Wid: Are you a software update? because not right now.

Isamu: Is something burning?

Wid, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you.

Isamu: Wid, the toaster is literally on fire.

Isamu: *seductively takes off glasses*

Isamu: Wow...

Anna: *blushes* Haha... what?

Isamu: You're really fucking blurry.

Anna: Any questions?

Wid: Uh, yeah, WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?

Anna: Uh, a plan, duh...

Shiyu: Wid, chill, I know it’s weird, but Anna has a point.

Wid:

Wid: THAT WAS LITERALLY A PONY DOODLE WITH A HAT!!

Wid: I know this isn’t going to end well and I don’t care. So don’t you try and stop me, Sara!

Sara: I wasn’t stopping you. I was asking if you had a spare camera so I can record this.

Lili: I'm not that stupid!

Shiyu: Lili, you literally ate the wax from a babybel.

Lili: ANNA TOLD ME IT WAS EDIBLE!

Isamu: *visiting the squad* Hello, I just came to-

Isamu: *sees Sara shoving Shiyu into the washing machine while Anna records and Wid watches*

Isamu: *retreating* Something suddenly came up.

Shiyu: I failed my safety training course today.

Lili: Why, what happened?

Shiyu: Well one of the questions was "In case of a fire, what steps would you take?"

Lili: And?

Shiyu: Well apparently "FUCKING LARGE ONES" isn't an acceptable answer.

Lili: How would you like your coffee?

Wid: As dark and as bitter as my soul.

Lili, shouting to someone behind the counter: I need one vanilla latte with extra cream and sugar!

Wid: It’s time to turn this into a real business.

Shiyu: What do you mean? Like, carry a briefcase, and wear a tie, and pay taxes?

Anna: Wait, have you not been paying your taxes?

Sara: I handle our accounting.

(no but this is actually me)

Sara: Honestly, I am so evil. So full of darkness. I feed of the souls of the living I strike fear into-

Anna: You sleep with a teddybear.

Sara: He’s my sECOND IN COMMAND IN MY ARMY OF DARKNESS!

Lili: You are an absolute fucking dork.

Anna, singing: Yeah, but I'm your dork!

Lili: *sighs* Yeah, you're my dork.

Lili: Guys, I didn’t memorize my lines!

Isamu: Just use your lack of common sense! Everyone knows the characters in plays are dumb as fuck!

*During the play*

Pauline: Hey! You finally made it! Did you get the donuts?

Lili: W-what’re donuts?

Pauline: I am darkness. I am an power. I am your worst nightmare. I could kill a man in more ways than you can imagine. I am the night. I am fury, I am a weapon, I am-

Anna: A doll.

Isamu: A cinnamon roll.

Lili: A sweetheart.

Pauline:

Pauline: ...stop it.

Pauline: I think I just figured something out. I got to go.

Wid: Aren't you forgetting something?

Pauline: Uuh...*hesitantly kisses Wid's forehead before running out.*

Wid: No, pay your bill! Damn, who raised you?

Pauline: Why should I make my bed, when I'm just gunna unmake it to sleep in it anyways?

Anna: Why should I feed you if your just gunna die anyways?

Pauline:

Pauline: I'll go make my bed-

Lili: Yo dumbass, get over here.

Shiyu: Okay-

Anna: *gleefully runs past* I’m coming!

Shiyu, sadly: I thought... I was dumbass...

Shiyu: That shirt looks great, Sara.

Sara: Thanks.

Shiyu: But I bet it would look even better on Lili's floor.

Lili: Are you hitting on Sara... for me?

Pauline: I dare you-

Lili: Isamu is not allowed to accept dares anymore.

Pauline: Why not?

Isamu: "I have no regard for my own or others personal safety", as some would say.

Pauline: Dearly Beloved, we are here today to remember Isamu, taken from us in the prime of life; when they were crushed by a runaway semi, driven by the Incredible Hulk.

Isamu: Aww, you knew my favorite cause of death.

Lili: Why are there little handprints all over the walls?

Wid, whispering: Why are there little handprints all over the walls?

Sara, whispering: Because I have little hands.

Wid: Because they have little hands.

Anna: I’ve made a spread sheet of all the crime in Brooklyn.

Anna: There’s so much crime in New York, no one should live here.

Lili: Pros and cons of dating me.

Lili: Pros. You'll be the cute one.

Lili: Cons. Holy shit, where do I begin-

Shiyu: Sometimes I drink milk straight from the container.

Pauline: The cow??

Shiyu: What?

Isamu: Pauline, W H Y?

Lili: We just ate. Why are you making pancakes?

Sara: For the dogs.

Wid: Why are your tongues purple?

Isamu, texting in the group chat: I wonder what Apple shots would look like?

Shiyu: That’s the longest worm I’ve ever seen.

Isamu: Is this your plan B?

Lili: What do you call quantums of electromagnetic radiation that don’t get along?

Sara: Hey, no, you stay out of this, this is between me and Isamu!

Anna: Truth or dare?

Isamu: How many children do you have?

Isamu, tearing up the room: Where are they?

Sara, very tired: Can I sleep in your bed?

Isamu: I failed my safety training course today.

Pauline, watching Isamu and Sara fight: Are you sure they should be fighting? What if they get hurt?

(ok but this is kinda accurate)

Isamu: Do you want some tea?

Pauline: I have an idea.

Wid: When I was a kid, Isamu told me that the paper strip that’s in the chocolate kisses were edible and I ate them with the chocolate for a year.

Pauline: What the fuck? People actually tell their crushes they like them??

Shiyu: What's wrong with you?

Wid: I intend to stay pissed at you forever.

Anna, hungover: Please tell me I'm imagining that I claimed I was king of the ducks.

Anna, holding a rock: Isamu just gave this to me and said "I feel like you deserve the moon but all I can give you is a rock".

Anna: What do you have?

Pauline: Well, well, well, if it isn’t the consequences of my actions.

Lili: Alright, listen up you little shits.

Anna: I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal, that's where the blood's supposed to be!

Pauline: So are you gonna explain how the hell you crashed my car?

Sara: How stupid do you think I am?!

Pauline: Honestly, I am so evil. So full of darkness. I feed of the souls of the living I strike fear into-

Lili: I'm going the fight the next person who insults Pauline.

Lili: I currently have 7 empty notebooks and I have no idea what to put in them. Any suggestions?

Anna: I wanna die.

Shiyu: Are you sure this is safe?

Wid: My life is a little too much panic and not enough disco.

Isamu: The time to act is now.

Isamu: Shiyu won’t wake up, what do I do?

Isamu: Why doesn’t Pauline find me sexy when I bite my lip?

Wid: Anna's first detention, I'm so proud.

Pauline: She's the girl of my dreams!

(and now, an only ship edition)

Pauline: So, are you two dating now?

Anna: I didn't drink that much last night.

Anna: Did you know you remind me of all 26 letters of the alphabet?

Shiyu: Just a minute. I need to go take out the trash.

Isamu: *sees Anna and Pauline together*

Pauline: Two years ago, I married my best friend.

Anna: Well, remember when Lili made a romantic dinner for me?

Isamu: Sara, let’s go!

Anna: Let’s watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

Wid: Is this your plan B?

Shiyu: I would never say that my partner is a bitch and I don’t don’t like them. That’s not true… My partner is a bitch and I like them so much!

Lili: I find it very unseemly of Shiyu to start dating again. Isn't the customary period of mourning 10 years?

Shiyu: Hey, Pauline? Can I get some dating advice?

Shiyu: I still have no idea how I’m attracted to you...

Isamu: Someone take me to art museums and make out with me.

Anna: Guys, my friend here is bilingual.

Sara: Valentine’s day is just a consumerist holiday that holds no real value other than drive people insane buying heart shaped chocolates for their significant others and pos-

Anna: So... who's the big spoon and who's the little spoon?

Shiyu: Isamu kissed me!

Sara: Ooh, somebody has a crush

Lili: *sees Anna and Shiyu together*

*playing twister*

Wid: So, what is Shiyu to you?

Shiyu: Why are your tongues purple?

[deberiaestarescribiendo]

Summary: Javi hasn't called...again, Isa tries to distract herself making a new friend, but she doesn't know that her intentions are far from innocent and are tied to Javi crossing paths again with someone from his past.

Warning: cursing, mention of violence, threats, anxiety, kidnapping. Very hateful characters from the show 👀

A/N: I'M SO SORRY THIS SHOULD HAVE BEEN POSTED ALMOST A MONTH AGO. I will try to finish this before this month ends. I think I could wrap this in one chapter more and an epilogue probably.

Just a small warning. This is a work of fiction and the intention is merely to develop a little bit more of a character I adore, Javi Peña. There's mention of the drug cartel, the violence they inflected in Latinoamérica (and as a Latina it hurts me very deeply, believe me) and the political involvement of different governments and agencies but this is not a political statement or trying to do other thing than entertain.

Chapter VII: Smart Choices

Isabel had never been a very popular girl, always the shy one in high school and she made a very small group of friends in college. But as everything in her life, there was a before and after since her life changed and she had Elvira.

She could not go to the club with her friends, their conversations about their new graduate’s struggles hurt her since she had to drop out, their heartbreaks and adventures had nothing to do with her life surrounded by diapers, feeding bottles and sleepless nights and so one day the phone stopped ringing, their friendship was limited to birthday parties and Christmas postcards while she became a mum and a wife. And thus making her world a very small universe with her child at the center and Javi and her turning around her.

So when that lady at the supermarket, Judy, called her she didn’t think anything weird out of it. Instead she was happy, excited to have another struggling mum that needed some comforting from somebody that understands her as much as she did.

“I’m sorry I took the liberty to ask for your phone number, I have a friend that goes to your mum’s salon and I ask her for it” she had said the first time she called.

Judy is a funny and very quick and intelligent woman. When they got their first coffee together, Isa barely asks any question, Judy fills the conversations so Isabel never has the chance to ask when she is meeting her kid or who gave her her phone number since she knows every client of her mother’s salon by heart and nobody mentioned her ever. But Judy keeps the conversation flowing, sharing her tragic story about leaving Colombia out of a very tough situation with a guy and creating a new life for her and her kid in the USA.

“It must have been so tough” Isa pounders

“Colombia back then was a bloodbath, you had to navigate the streets in survival mode, always looking behind your back and praying to come back home safe” Judy explains

“My husband worked in Colombia for a few years”

“Oh really? When?”

“80’s early 90’s"

“Well, he must have known. So sad! it is a very beautiful country...”Judy’s gaze is fixed far away as if she’s remembering something

“I guess it’s difficult to talk about it, my husband never shares much”

“Mm” she hums, she opens a golden lighter and gets the flame close to the cigarette on her red lips “What did he do there?”

“He worked at the Embassy” she’s not lying but she prefers not to specify, and now that’s past, the details are not really important

“Oh! and that’s what he’s doing in Mexico now?” she asks exhaling a white cloud of smoke making a perfect o with her lips

“Not exactly”

“He must be careful; I heard things are following the same path we suffered back in Colombia”

“Yes...he’s...smart, I’m sure he will be fine” Isa answers more to convince herself than her new friend

“I saw in the news the other day how a few civilians died during a clash between two fronting cartels and then the police. Very, very horrible images" she smacks her lips

"I haven't watched the news…" the knot in Isa's stomach grows tighter, Javi haven't called back even if he promised he would

"They kill anyone that is on their way, civilians, gringos too, DEA agents…" the Colombian woman casually brings the coffee cup to her lips when Isa frowns at her

"What did you say?" She asks

"They kill civilians?" Judy smiles uncomfortably the corner of her lips stretching up

"No, the last part"

"Gringos...DEA agents" she repeats

"Why did you say that?" The knot gets tighter restringing her throat and her question is just a whisper

"I… assume Javier must be…"

"I haven't told you what he does"

Judy gasps and bats her long black lashes a few times before changing her face to a complete cold expression, her glossy lips now a tight red line

"Look, Isabel, I think you are a very smart woman…" she starts

"I'm leaving"

Isabel pushes her chair back to go but the other woman's hand holds her to the table, her perfect manicure claws making her stay

"Sit, don't do anything stupid" Judy spats, the brief confrontation has alerted the waiters and they look at them intently until Judy gives them a very warm apologetic smile

"Who are you? What do you want?" Isabel tries to hold herself but her instincts is crying for her tu run, to get her baby back and look for Javier

But Javi could be anywhere

"You know your husband and I met, many years ago" she continues smoking "we worked closely in the hunt of Escobar" she smirks "I admit I was surprised to find him married and with a kid. He used to be involved with a very different type of woman"

"What do you want from Javi? If you hurt him I swear…" Isa mutters

"You must have been really special. A magical pussy" she laughs "or are you that dumb and naive that he lied to you and believed it" she crosses her arms over her chest, looking with a smug face from the white cloud of smoke "do you know what he did in Colombia? Do you know what he's capable of?"

"Where is he? If you touch him I swear to God I kill you" Isa tries to contain the tears, to seem strong but fails which makes Judy smile wider

"Oh! So you are an idiot little girl. Better keep up, cielo, if you want your husband alive"

México

A constant, something that keeps on proving itself to be right: shit does follow him. He tries the breathing techniques that the doctor showed him but the bag on his head stinks like rotten meat and the heat inside the van is unbearable. He finds a little solace feeling Steve's tigh pressed against his. Both of them rocking back and forth with each bump on the road

"Connie is going to kill me" his friend says

" If they don't kill us first"

"Callense cabrones" one shouts and Javi hears the muttering insult Steve pronounces before receiving one hit himself

He feels the vomit running up his throat, the smell, the heat and the fear have mixed themselves on his stomach and he can no longer calm himself down. He’s about to die, he knows it. About time, my friend, I elude death for so long in Colombia, so many close calls and now I’m about to die in some unknown part of Mexico because of a fucking middle age crisis I couldn’t handle.

He tries so hard to close his lips and swallow, breath, Peña, breath. The only cold thing in this van is the thin silver chain and medallion he wears around his neck.

This would be a marvellous moment to do some magic, old man Javi says to himself and that old saint around his neck. What did Isa call the old man engraved in it? Saint Jude. Okay, Jude, show yourself, please. This is actually a lost cause, it’s your field of expertise, c’mon

“Andando” the sicario pushes him out of the van before he can even process they have stopped the vehicle. The man grabs him by the arm harshly and guides him forward, the sun pierces the black bag over his head but he can’t only perceive the light and the sound of the gravel under his boots.

Suddenly the light changes to a white light and he feels the temperature lowering: a house with air conditioner and there’s a soft murmur of water but otherwise the house is silent. Javi memorizes those tiny details, it’s the only thing that could eventually help him if they’re held hostage and not killed right away.

The sicario pushes him and for a few milliseconds Javier thinks he’s about to fall hard to the ground but ends up on a chair. Then they pull both his arms to the back without any care and handcuffs him there.

Javi jumps from his seat when he hears the loud thump of the door closing, still in the dark and without any sign of company, he calls:

“Steve…”

Nothing

“Your friend is in the other room”

He could recognize that fucking voice anywhere, is engravated in his brain, in that part of his head that is capable of the worst, that tiny espace where he keeps every hateful and the worst people he has met, Bill Stechner being the number one on that list.

“I was so happy thinking you were dead and crawling back to hell” Javi sighs before he’s hit by the clarity in the room. He blinks fast until his eyes are adjusted to it again. It’s a nice room, wide and scattered by a few pieces of furniture covered by white sheets, the dust in the air makes evident it has been closed for a long time.

“So was I thinking you were rotting old in your father’s little ranch but here we are”

His beard is greyer and the already receding hairline is back a few inches, but he looks exactly the same, tha smug stupid face is looking at him from above. That smirk of “I’m always five steps ahead from you” the same he had when he made him leave the Embassy before catching Escobar and the same he had when he tried to take down Cali. But now he’s here in Mexico, what the fuck is he doing here?

“And, do tell, please, why the fuck do are path cross again?” Javier spats

“Oh! I didn’t want to cross paths with you. I must admit I found it funny when I saw who was managing the account for our textile export, but you, being the noisy stupid man that you are “ Stechner approaches him, his smirk freezes in a tight line “had to call your friends. And you see, you’re mending on my business again”

“So you switched from the CIA to the Narcos?”

“Javier, javier…” he sighs “You are always focusing in the wrong things and not in the bigger picture”

“The bigger picture being…” Javier rolls his eyes at him

“You wouldn’t understand, I tried a few times in Colombia and you ended up fucking it all up” he shakes his head

“So what do you want from me now?”

“Well now that you are here fucking everything up again I’d prefer if the repercussions go to the right direction”

“Which is it not yours, I guess, or whomever you’re working for”

“Yeah” he laughs and points at him “you’re smart when you want”

“And wouldn’t it be better to kill us right away?”

“Oh, you see, my associetes want to do it” Stechner nods “The really don’t give a fuck. But I told them that you could be of service”

“You’re really delusional if you think…”

Stechner interrupts him “And if you weren’t willing to cooperate we could always resort to the good old ways” the man walks to a nearby table, over the white sheet there’s a manila folder. Bill opens it slowly, that stupid smirk back at again on his face, relishing on the desperation and fear in Javi’s eyes.

Please, not Isa, please not my child

“Your wife made a new friend, it’s a small world after all, isn’t it?” Stechner shows him a picture, he recognises the cafe, Isa is seated talking to another woman he hasn’t seen in years.

“Judy is very nice when she wants” he takes out another picture, this time Isa is on the backyard playing with Elvi “You have a very beautiful family”

“If you touch them, motherfucker” Javi tries to get out of the chair, he doesn’t even care if the metal from the cuff cuts his wrists. He just want to do what he has wanted to do since he started working in Colombia and crossed paths with the CIA

“They won’t, it is entirely upon you that this is just a simple anecdote. I promised I’ll try to control them...if you do what you have to do” Stechner shrugs and throws the pictures to the floor where they rest in front of Javi’s feet

“What do you want?” he murmurs, his gaze is fixed on those images trying to see something, when were they taken? how does he know if they already hurt them?

Please, please he begs and his vision is starting to blurry

“Well, my associates will appreciate it if the DEA will center its efforts on our common enemy. You see it right? it’s the same story all over again; the enemy of my enemy is my friend…”

“I’m not DEA anymore”

“Are you? I mean you’re here with your dear Steve in an ongoing investigation that mainly relies on your testimony so…”

Stechner roams around Javier’s chair “It’s not like you haven’t done it before, Javi, think about it as if you are involving yourself with the lesser evil, there will be a time to capture my associates, but not now”

“Just go back home and when the time comes you can assure the DEA that those terrible horrible people that are getting that poison in our beautiful country are involved with our common enemy. What is the difference between one Cartel and the other? It just a matter of time they both get caught” he continues

“Why are you involved in this?”

“We’ve done this many times, Peña, let it go. It’s better this way or do you want to end up like Kiki? or better yet, your beautiful wife or your kid?” Bill points to the pictures of the Peña’s family “think about it”

And he thinks about it, the hate and the fear burning in his chest. So many years protecting himself in covers of solitude, brief encounters to relieve the stress and alcohol, protecting his heart from this fear and pain of getting his family killed for his job.

You did this to them, you looked for it. Now what?

Isa (Laredo)

She drives fast, fast as she has never driven before. She has always been a very responsible person and even more when she became a mother. Elvira is seated on the back, her little hands holding the seat hard and she has called her a few times, her voice shaky and scared.

“Mami, where are we going?”

“To Grandpa’s, honey”

“You’re too fast”

“I know, but we need to get there now”

The screeching sound of the tires stopping abruptly on the road has alerted Chucho who now waits with the porch lights on when they get out of the car.

“Mija, what’s wrong?” he screams

“I think Javi is in the danger”

[wildlyminiaturesandwich]

Do you have pcos? or any kind of health problem that makes it hard for you to lose weight? I'm just curious, don't answer it if you don't feel comfortable

Ok so I got a couple messages asking this same thing, as well as people suggesting that “just lose weight and then try again”, so I’m gonna put a bunch of information (and I mean A BUNCH of information) under a cut here that explains everything and why “just losing weight” isn’t a solution nor is it the problem. Like, at all.

If you don’t want to read all of this, you really don’t have to. There’s a TL;DR at the bottom and I wouldn’t blame you for just scrolling straight there and skipping my rant lol

I don’t have PCOS, no, my weight is mostly a “side effect” of my mental health and years of trying different medications to help with that. Just in case some people aren’t aware, two of the most common side effects of anti-depressants are increased appetite and weight gain. That coupled with one of the two most common symptoms of chronic depression — lack of energy and motivation — means that over the years I’ve slowly put on weight.

Even though every doctor insists on telling me I’m overweight and need to lose weight as though I’m completely oblivious to my own body and such an idea as losing weight has never occurred to me before, I have in fact tried to lose weight many many times over the years with very little success no matter how healthily I ate and how much I exercised. The only time I have ever had success was back in my 20s when I switched to a gluten and dairy free diet to try to fix another issues I was having with my gut. This is why, in the past few weeks, Mr Sandwich and I have been slowly switching our diets to be gluten and dairy free.

BUT even though I am doing that, and exercising as much as I can with my limited energy, it’s not enough. I can lose weight, sure, but I can’t lose enough weight quickly (and safely) enough to be able to do IVF, which I’ll get to in a minute. So it’s not always as simple as “just lose weight”, everyone is different and despite what most people think, a lot of overweight people don’t chose to be that way. Why anyone would think that is beyond me, but a lot of people do and because of this you get people treating fat people as less than human, as though we’re not worthy of any kindness or sympathy because obviously we had to have done this to ourselves, right?

This is also why I get so annoyed when people equate being overweight to being unhealthy. The whole “overweight people are twice as likely to die early” bullshit is nonsense! Sure sometimes it’s the case, but not always. I am not medically unhealthy at all. Apart from being unable to conceive and my mental health issues, neither of which are a symptom or side effect of my weight, I am actually perfectly healthy. Over the past few years I’ve had every test anyone could come up with to try to find out why I wasn’t falling pregnant and that includes things like liver, kidney and thyroid function, cholesterol, diabetes and blood sugar tests, blood pressure, the list goes on. Everything everyone always associates with fat people, all of it was tested, and everything came back perfectly normal. I had a doctor literally say to me “If I hadn’t seen you in person, I would never have known you were overweight based on these results”, which just goes to show you how biased even doctors can be.

Warning: If you don’t wanna learn some interesting stuff about fertility and reproduction, don’t read any further.

So why am I trying IVF if I’m healthy?

Fun fact: When a woman talks about her “biological clock” ticking, it’s not even a joke; a woman’s biological clock is like a clock counting down from the moment she’s born… or maybe it’s more like an hourglass? Either way, unlike men, who can produce viable sperm from the time they hit puberty until the day they die, women have all the eggs they will every have in their entire life already tucked away in their tiny little ovaries from the moment they form as a fetus. That ovarian reserve starts at around 6-7 million follicles during the fetal stage, by the time that new baby girl is born that number has already dropped to 1 million, and by the time she hits puberty she’s only got about 300,000 left. Of those 300,000, only about 300-400 will be ovulated during her entire lifespan. That number obviously continues to decrease when a woman ovulates each month right up until they run out and that is when the woman will go through menopause, and there is no way to raise that amount either. Once the eggs run out, that’s it, there’s no more. Pretty grim huh?

By my age (35), a women with perfect reproductive health will have an AMH (Anti-Müllerian hormone, essentially an indicator of how many eggs you have) level of around 5.1 pmol/L (2.3 ng/mL) but for some reason, my ovaries seem to think I’m actually50. My AMH level is 0.3 pmol/L (0.1 ng/mL), which is considered EXTREMELY low and essentially what that means is I will never be able to conceive naturally. My only chance to conceive and carry my own biological child will be through IVF.

Now, it’s super important to note that low AMH has absolutely nothing to do with weight. There are a lot of different reasons that AMH levels can be low and they could be anything from hormone imbalance to a side effect of cancer treatments, from smoking to mumps. My hormones are normal, I’ve never had cancer or mumps, and I don’t smoke; in my case, it’s most likely due to constant and severe amounts of stress (like years and years of it). But seeing as there’s no medical way to test that, the cause of my low AMH has been deemed by my doctor as idiopathic (unknown). So while weight does have some affect on conceiving naturally, in my case it wouldn’t matter how much I weighed because my AMH level would still be low even if I wasn’t overweight.

In Australia, there are these wonderful things called Low Cost or Bulk Bill IVF clinics. At a private IVF clinic you’d be looking at about $10-15k (Aussie dollars) a cycle for IVF, but at a bulk bill clinic they can charge as little as $800! Unfortunately at these low cost clinics you’re not able to chose your doctor either, you just get whoever is available so that’s a problem too. But the way they’re able to keep costs low is a combination of Medicare rebates (Australia’s free health care system) and the fact that they don’t use full sedation during egg collection which costs a buttload of money because anesthetic. They use a combination of local anesthetic and twilight sedation, which means lower cost for the patient, it’s win win… unless you’re overweight. For reasons I have yet to figure out — because not a single clinic can come up with any reason every time I ask — most clinics demand you be under a certain weight before they’ll treat you. I’m not going to tell you my exact weight but it’s not anywhere near this stupid limit.

Another fun fact: This weight limit is non-existent in private clinics but I don’t have, nor could I get, $10-15k. The fertility specialist I spoke to yesterday also suggest bariatric (lap band) surgery as though that were an actual viable option. Like, listen lady, if I had the money for that (anywhere between $5-20k), don’t you think I would be using that to go to a fat-friendly private clinic instead of talking to your rude arse at a low cost clinic?! 

This all brings me back to the TL;DR of it:

Here’s the problem I’m facing. A year ago when my AMH (egg supply) was tested it was 1.4 pmol/L (0.6 ng/mL), which was already very low then, but it’s dropped down to 0.3 pmol/L in a little over a year, so at that rate I’m going to run out of eggs and be hitting early menopause most likely before the end of the year. At 35 years old.

Merry Christmas to me.

This has nothing AT ALL to do with my weight but for some reason these IVF clinics have a weight limit and there is absolutely no way I can lose enough weight (safely and healthily) before I run out of eggs, hence why I’m so mad. Even if I had barbaric surgery it still wouldn’t be enough time! None of these stupid clinics give a shit about that, all they keep saying is “lose weight and then come back to us”, as though I have all the time in the world!

My only options now are to a) rob a bank and take my fat arse to a private clinic. b) rob a bank, get myself some bariatric surgery and take a buttload of speed to lose weight SUPER fast, and then take myself to a low cost clinic. c) rob a bank and use the money to buy a baby. Or d) continue to do as I’ve been doing and will continue to do regardless of what happens and that’s lose weight the safe and healthy way and run out of eggs while I’m at it.

Last fun fact of the post: All of this could have been avoided had my stupid GP tested my AMH levels 5 YEARS AGO when I asked him to! It would have been low then as well but not as low so I would have had more time AND back then I would have just scrapped in under the ridiculous weight limit!

/rant

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

Y'all getting tortured too..I lost it. I couldn't handle it

I got germ x on a cotton round and started washing my face.

I got more body parts to literally scrub

After my grandpa died of cancer -- well. Denise killed him but they said it was the cancer...

I took a shower and scrubbed my body every day. I got a new toothbrush weekly.

I used a scouring pad from the kitchen and I didn't ever turn the cold water knob but just a tiny stream.

The water was all the way on full blast hot.

I scoured my skin off.

My Uncle Dad took me to the hospital when he finally came home from the ship. It finally docked.

Doctor asked had I burned myself. "No I just took shower and it just didn't feel clean.. It never feels clean"

"How hot is the shower?"

"Oh will the way hot. I turn the cold on slightly about midway to do the final rinse"

"How long do you shower for and how many times do you perform a "rinse"?"

"Well the shower stays on... I'd say 3 - 4 times when it's all the way hot then at least twice, so about 6.. Sometimes 10.. 12... 45 one day"

I heard my uncle dad sob from the corner. I looked st him perplexed. Cause I was doing right. I was keeping the germs off me.

"I just gotta stay clean dad" as he raised his head he sucked in air through his nose. And i saw a man in misery and guilt

"I'm so sorry sorry i thought you could handle the cancer. I thought you'd be okay and i just had ti fo to work but she...."

"I can handle the cancer dad. I just gotta stay clean and keep the germs off of me"

"What kind of products do you use. SOS pads... Denise doesn't buy a lot of Shampoo so i try to keep,that for my hair... So I'll use dish soap or sometimes even laundry. Bleach is good but she doesn't buy that one slot either. I don't like the amoniea. The smell bothers me but I had to use it 3 or 4 times because I didn't have anything else but that was when i found the SOS pads under the sink. Lo and behold they have soap in them already. So, i quiet using extra except when i wash my face with them. Soften the skin up a little bit more than so I don't get wrinkles"

I looked dead into his eyes and told something I didn't tell any other adult about what i did. I told my friends... But not in a way that it was me. "You know someone i heard of was...." Not I did this. But someone did.

My dad according to my DNA4U although there's,a story about that...

He was in the corner crying the whole time I was talking. "No she needs help. I need help for her."

The doctor said they had received a phone call he thought it was from the FBI. But he looked at his notepad and said "Nope the CIA."

"I just have to keep the germs off me tell them that. They need to, too"

"I'm calling them Billy don't you worry"

"Yeah" he said into the phone "i got a situation here. I'm gonna need you to come in and take her. ... Mental ward"

Son of a bitch. I attacked him. I wasn't crazy. I needed to be germ free.

I grabbed the phone "WHAT I NEED IS TO BE CLEAN AND YOU DO TOO GODDAM THE WHOLE WORLD"

And i beat that poor doctor in the head and back wirh that phone until it fell apart and nothing was left.

"And that's how I kill germs" I told his dead body.

Mental institution?!?! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!? THE GERM INFESTATIONS I WOULD DIE IMMEDIATELY JUST BREATHING THE AIR!!! NO WAY IN HELL!!! GOD FUCKING NO!!!

My dad just sat there as i beat the doctor to death m his eyes and jaw open as wide as can be.

"You understand right? I'm not here to hurt you but This place it's so dirty but i came here with you. Because i trust you to keep me safe. But he wouldn't. Not. The dirtiest place in the world he would send me to and i just can't have that. I'll push the panic button to get you some help that you need"

It was right by the door. So these big ass mother fucking dudes came me in started grabbing me to hold me down and strap me to the bed. Big mother fuckers HUGE. Body builders and shit. "ARE YOU GERM FREE!! DONT GET A HOLD OF ME!! LET ME GO. GODDAMINIT!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I killed all 3. "Now i gotta wash my hands and arms. They fucking touched my face and every thing. Stuck thier fingers in my mouth and all. I need to,start with bleach. Can you get me some?"

My dad was in shock.

"Maybe later. I'll ask you again when your nervous system calms down" I washed my face and elbows.

It was 1992 Christmas was a few weeks away. My lie age I was 12. My real age I was only 8.

Finally the CIA came in "are you here to help or force me to wash my hands again?"

He put his arms up as he walked by me and sat next to my dad "well i know Gaberiel and Calvin can help. Gaberial goes to school with her and he said she looks alright but seems to be in a trance like state most of the time. But they will know what to do. Do not worry. Sabrina you cannot keep killing doctors like that"

"I'm not going!! The backwoods motel where they put the strange and i tell you none of them know how to,wash their hands!!"

"You look like a witch!!"

"At least im a clean one fuck y'all shit"

This whole team of huge CIA dudes... They all washed their hands no less than 3 minutes up their elbows for an additional two while I watched.

This big one said "she's not alright you know that. I never washed my hands this much in my life"

I warned him i would kill him if he didn't get off the team "oh no it's refreshing I don't have a problem. My face too here i come"

When he lifted his face he saw mine. "There's nothing wrong with me sir. This world is unclean"

"That's that transelike state. Her voice gets hollow and the carries. Did she kill the others like that Bill?"

"No I didn't. He made me upset while i waited for th3 help I supposed to be needing. Like no one knows,l they can poison me any second"

I knew but i didn't know Denise injected medicine into my grandpa's vein.

I COULDN'T handle this guy at the sink. He wanted to teach me like he could do it better. Like i had something wrong with me. And he didnt like it"

"Out. Just get the fuck out of here. I'll give you a chance to live."

I ended up killing the whole line of people but this one little yellow Asian man.

He was surrounded by dead bodies. 5. They took the 3 guard nurses and the doctor out already.

"Do i wash my hands now? Is it my turn?"

"SIR!!" i said pissed off. I looked around me. My poor dad "well what do you think about your surroundings?"

"You look good. Able to kill real easily. Looks like I need some more training. But I'm just here to wash my hands as i was told to"

He told me the times he needed to wash.

"Well no one else is in line so I suppose that yes it's your turn now"

I laid down on the little check up table bed and fell to sleep. I was exhausted. Killed 9 people. Because they were aliens. And i would let someone live. 3 people in total. Out of 12..

It could be a good day after all, as long as i didn't go to Baywood Inn Acres.. I'd been there before. I escaped and let all the mental patients out. Well maybe if i went I could do that again I thought as I drifted off to sleep. I could still do it. I'd killed 9 today in just seconds.. I could let the rest escape.

Snoop put me on time restrictions. I bit him. I kicked him. I punched him in the stomach. He would walk in with a shield from SWAT to tell me to stop washing at the sink.

It was all scuffed up and I had to clean it. Germs get in them scratches and cracks...

Before he knew it it was all soaped up and If he exposed, his face he would get soaped too. Bar of soap.

Oh boy he was pissed off at me. "You need to kill the right people!!" Him and Alex Laughlin both said

"Then let me use the soap for as long as I want to"

I was a horrror show star. Like a doll. Like poltergeist. There's that doll that turns it's head all creepy. My eyes be glassy I walked around like I was dead.

I was. I was so dead inside. I KNEW my grandpa would die for no fucking reason. I knew and there wss nothing I could do to save that Old man!!!!

And i KNEW i was going get cancer, too!!!

Just wash it all off. Wash it down the drain.,that is I what i would say.

This video to some. But I used to do that.

2 years later I did get cancer in my throat just like I knew I would. I wrote about it.

So I handle death a lot better. Losing one. Germs.

If I know a person doesn't wash their hands and their hands are warm. I freak the fuck out.

"Don't fucking touch me" and I get filled with violent rage.

Some people think it's cool to make fun of me. A violent assassin. To this date with my bare hands no magic included in the last 35 years I've killed 22,489,601,427 people.

So y'all need to learn to wash your mother fucking hands. 35 seconds i recommend.

CDC says it's good in 20... Don't underestimate the power of germs. Scrub faster and go for long term use of that soap you just squirted on you. Go up to the elbows!

Eventually I got okay. To be okay I had to kill people. 862 thousand.

All aliens in stolen bodies. Then i was okay again.

But until then i would sleep walk to the sink wash,me up then hit the streets in a trance.

So they got a kid to live with me... Anton. From Queer Eye... Him...

"No what are you gonna do? He's got germs on him and he's our only kid!" Alex would bark at me.

"Then you kill him" i would tell him. He never did.

So i posted a video earlier. Poor child. "Wash your hands" "wash your hands!" In the video I shared that he shared. Poor child, "Now you gotta wash both hands although only one is dirty. The other might get jealous. Up to your elbows if you want to but definitely up to your wrists"

He played in the dirt a lot. If he didn't Snoop would pour it on him. "Now what are you gonna do?!?"

I smelled him make sure the cat didn't piss on it

Man Snoop did a hard fight. "Its fucking dirt snoop shut the fuck up!!:

I let that boy teach me about dirt. Is it clean? Does it feel fresh? Or smell bad?"

I let him choose whether to wash or not.

Somethings he HAD to wash after touching "raw meat" we had a list of things that could harm us if it was left on our hands.

I had to wash after uncooked hot dogs. Had to. Kid goddam creeped me out because he didn't

I'd just look at him like he was a leeper to give me leprosy from an uncooked hot dog.

"CHILL OUT!!!"

"Uh anuh he touched a raw hot dog and he didn't wash. Uncooked meat!! Its on there check the goddam list in a hurry" he was like a monster under my bed.

"It says raw meats baby."

"Uncooked is raw"

That little boy. Sweet precious angel he is. He said "i didn't agree because i wanted to go out side and play but now I see i take the hot dog containments into the dirt if I don't wash. So i would like to wash please"

I earned a kiss from Alex who was going by Gaberiel. At the time.

It shocked me with surprise. I did something right for the first time in weeks i wasn't yelled at by an adult. I put my head down on the arm of the chair and wept and wailed and cried.

I spent so much time fighting with who was supposed to be my friends. That it made me calm and feel normal. Ever since that day my grandpa died. I had so much built in my chest like a wall. Filled my body so.

Snoop finally understood under all that muscle mass and need to assassinate... I was still there.

"Lets go get some ice cream it's on the list for,being,human and you get sprinkles for crying."

"Lets go ma then I wanna play in the dirt.

I wasn't sure i could leave the house. I felt really wobbly... To go outside and not kill... It was dangerous. I tried to go back in like 14 times. But Alex kept stopping me. Or snoop or the baby Antony.

"Took us 15 minutes to go get us a dam treat,jist from the door to the car. When we go killing shes flying down the steps and first one to the car. Ain't no one gonna know what's wrong with her! Ain't no one!"

"I do! You just need to wash your hands! Wash Your hands!!" I had a sweet little boy next to me... I looked out the window of that white Cadillac and I sure did hope i could figure out how to,keep the world safe. They played and teased and made,him laugh.,all every one,in the car laughing with joy.

I just wanted to open the car door, jump out and die.

Later I finally told. Some movie reminded me of my grandpa... The only one I ever had. The one that allowed me to kill Denise. A prison guard.

"He died from something out side of him. Not inside out side. I can't handle it. It went down his arm.. Pink. It was something pink"

Snoop on his knees. "What was it poision?"

"Watch. Into here down this way to his pinkie then back up and then down around his heart and through his legs and up the other side and to his brain then he could smell the medicine cold cough syrup. And she kept doing it until the full bottle was,in,his body. It didn't work tho. The next day and the next. 3 more,days than,that. Then he was,dead. 2 bottles each day. Of cold medicine to kill tiny germs"

Alex's face,was,in terrified horror. Snoop still as a statue.

"Where do they live at?" Asked snoop.

"Texas. Redway lane"

"That is where you live at".

"That is what i am telling you. And i was in Texas and i didn't go to Arizona"

Snoop began to throw up in his hand and,ran,from the room.

Alex and Anthony looked at me all "why did you have to tell the truth?!"

"I'm trying to watch the movie here!!" Said Anthony "and tomorrow I wanna play in dirt"

"That's ok baby That's what you can do with Uncle Snoop. We'll be quiet now so you can watch the movie."

If you don't get germs on you. You don't get sick. Then you don't get murdered.

Stay Clean.

Corona. I'm telling you. It ain't no different.

Except I was told something worse than eating Vicks Vapo Rub would happen to me from Denise.

I had to kill 981,602,375 people like Denise until I felt satisfied the world was safer.

Until I could breathe again.

I felt my grandpa die. I was with him. I felt his whole body. When his left lung collapsed...

And he was begging "no Denise don't do it. It won't make me better. No Denise I don't want none. Dont put it in my IV. I don't have no cough or cold. I have cancer and I'm going to beat it"

And that Old man died. And I tried so hard. To keep his body alive. Just stay with him.

And his body was so riddled with cancer. He couldn't take being filled with the thick cough syrup.

After a million kills. Grandpa said I could stop the world would get better then. "If I do two more grandpa then it would get allot better"

We killed 6 million predators. By hand. We picked them from prisons.

Death Row and life sentences. They could die early if they wanted. They understood they would die. They signed contracts. And we filled them in gas chambers. And filled the air with a non toxic cough syrup smelling gas that made them relax. Laughing gas. Then we used rat poision gas. Until they died. We had some other gases too. I didnt care.

We did right by our promise and they choked end coughed choked on a white foam frothing from,their mouths. And,died.. And we watched them through a little window with gas masks on our faces.

"You know you could used a little more nitrous" would say Alex

"Only half choke to death. Most of them lay down peacefully to die."

Oddly white men were more often to fight Than the black man.

"Either the black men are innocent or they know,what to do in a poison situation"

One man. Black. Should been,dead. But he was crawling around checking on,the others. In pain he was.

I ran,from the control booth. Dodging people trying to stop me. I swung open the door against policy. Grabbed him up under his shoulders "why did you sign the paper if you didn't have any thing to do with the crime?$?!" I yelled through my gas mask

"All these are all dead i want to,know why I'm not!!: he was crying he was scared. "I didn't sign the paper because i wanted the hell out. I knew if i died I would go to Heaven!: he was sobbing. In a gas chamber. Filled with poison.

Alex held up a gas mask in,the Window I pointed my head towards my direction.

And I held the black man while he was on his knees in a room full of gas. Alex put the gas mask to protect from,gas on his face.

"Lets go you got to get out. You only have half a,mask"

"I can't"

"You got to,get out now"

He chose his fate. No one else. He would tell me when he was ready to live and i would hold him on his knees until he did. I just stared into Alex's eyes. While he said over and over "you got to, get out" like in case i forgot.

"I wanna get out! Can you help me??" I reached down and grabbed him by his waist. Hoisted him up to my hip and carried him out like a toddler. A nice grown man.

This poor man was a mess.

No one mentioned i was covered in cyanide. For 3 hours until when my skin began to itch "you need,to shower"

"When you finally get covered in killer germs you don't care Because you found someone more important, more desperate. Someone more in a bad situation.,then you don't even notice"

"You trained me not to. Could I at least get an SOS pads for my bath?"

Every one wore a gas mask around me. Even the kid. For three days Anthony did.

"Snoop said you can't go in his car covered in,gas,like,that so we got a rental car"

"You gonna drive in that gas mask?"

"Yeah. Sounds fun. We have to roll down the Windows for you to breathe. I know downtown LA but... And also we got you w hotel. You are covered in cyanide!! No on wants you home. But i do"

I think... It was the first time in my life any one ever gave me a bath while wearing a gas mask.

We had to,change,3 hotel rooms. So i wouldn't pollute the place up.

"See? You yelled at me and you're all jist as bad,and,won't even let,me,see my kid"

"Yeah well you trained us to be extra careful. More cautious than sorry"

Gaberiel. Alex Laughlin slept in bed next to me. In a gas,mask.

Sometimes I couldn't sleep. Thinkin about that man and my grandpa.

And I'd look down at the man next,to me. Pased out. Looking like an innocent kid himself.

I adored him. I felt so much love that a person would be in,danger for me. I shook his gas,mask gently

"What you woke me up what do you want? It was on purpose, too"

"Do you think that man knowed i cared? That I might love someone other than myself?"

"We treat you as though you are selfish because you sre using self harm and you don't understand it. No one is supposed to gargle with bleach? What If you swallowed it?"

"It burns my nostrils any way"

"That's not the point but baby doll. You could kill yourself and we wouldn't have you no more. That is,the point.,that is why we called you selfish. Your addiction to cleanliness could,kill you snd no one,wants that to happen. But look what you do. Go,in a gas,chamber FULL of gas with only a half mask on. You're lucky you don't go blind. But look st it this way. We pushed too hard and in the wrong way and you did drink bleach on purpose in desperation to be clean. It was undiluted, too. I know. I watched you. And you Didjt say anything. Just smiled and said "i feel" i wanted to,slap you then for not listening. But when you pushed me back so you could leave,tje room through the door i was blocking. You didnt act like nothing happened. You felt like nothing happened. And I realized we were doing something wrong then two,weeks later you tell us why it was so,important to be kept clean and germs off of you. And i wanted to die for the way snoop and I had been mistreating you. And that is why I started the gas chambers of criminals to honor Yoir grandpa for working at the prison to keep,them in line. End,it for your grandpa and avenge his death with revenge. It would be what healed you both. And next time call the police when someone is being poisoned."

"She did it when i,was asleep. I would fall asleep all kinds of times of days to be with him. I promised when i was a young kid that i wouldn't let him die alone. Not by her. And when i woke up I was too groggy to remember what was going on. I thought it was a dream a bad one i hoped it wasn't real but it was and i can't get over this feeling this fear.. That had me at constant companion"

"What does that mean my love?"

"Evil. My grandpa said"

So y'all in,this world of 2020

Keep,calm.

It is,gonna be okay.

[ah17hh]

rap 🎙 god ✝️ but 🍑 with ➕emojis 😎 for 4️⃣ lyrics 📝 via /r/emojipasta

rap 🎙 god ✝️ but 🍑 with ➕emojis 😎 for 4️⃣ lyrics 📝

Look 👀 , I 🙋🏼‍♂️ was gonna 🚶🏼‍♂️go easy 1️⃣➕1️⃣ on you 🧑🏻 not 🙅🏼 to hurt 😢 your 👉🏻🧑🏻 feelings 🧠, But 🛑 I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ only going to get ✊🏻 this 📍 one ☝🏻shot ⛹🏼. Something's wrong 🤨, I can feel it 🧐. Just a feeling 🤔 I've got 🙋🏼‍♂️, like something's 😦 about to happen 😨, but I 🙋🏼‍♂️ don't know what 🤷🏼‍♂️. If that 📍 means 📝✅ what I think 🙋🏼‍♂️🧠 it means 📝✅, we're 🌎 in trouble ⚠️, big trouble ‼️⚠️. And if he 🦹🏼‍♂️ is as bananas 🤪🍌 as you say 🧑🏻🗣✅, I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️not taking 🙅🏼✊🏻 any chances 🚫🎲, You 👉🏻 were just what 👌🏻 the doctor 👩🏼‍⚕️ ordered 📝! I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ beginning 🏁 to feel 🧠 like a Rap God 🗣🎙🤴🏼, Rap God 🗣🎙🤴🏼, All my people 👨‍👩‍👦👨‍👨‍👦‍👦 from the front 🔝to the back 🔙 nod ↪️↩️, back 🔙 nod ↪️↩️. Now 📅 who 👤❓ thinks 🤔💭 their arms 💪🏼 are long 📏 enough to slap 👋🏻 box 🥊, slap 👋🏻 box 🥊? They 👨‍👨‍👦‍👦 said I 🙋🏼‍♂️ rap 🗣🎙 like a robot 🤖 , so call me 🤙🏼 Rapbot 🤖🗯🎙. But for me 🧑🏼 to rap 🗣🎙 like a computer 💻 must be in my 🙋🏼‍♂️ genes 🧬, I 🙋🏼‍♂️ got ✊🏻 a laptop 💻 in my back 🔙 pocket 👖, My 🙋🏼‍♂️ pen 🖊 will go off 🔥💥📝when I 🧑🏼 half 1️⃣➗2️⃣ cock 🔫 it🖊, Got a fat knot 💰from that rap 🗣🎙 profit 📈💵. Made a living 🏠💵 and a killing 💰😈💰off it 🗣🎙, Ever since 🔙📆 Bill Clinton 👨🏻‍🦳 was still in office 📍🏛 With Monica Lewinsky 👩🏻 feeling 🖐🏻 on his 👨🏻‍🦳 nut-sack 🥜🌰. I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ an MC 😎🗣🎙 still as honest ♾💯🤷🏼‍♂️, But as rude 🥱🖕🏻and as indecent 🤬🗯as all hell ‼️, syllables 1️⃣2️⃣3️⃣. skillaholic 📝➡️😃, Kill 'em 🔪☠️ all 👨‍👩‍👦‍👦🌍 with; This📍flippity 🤸🏼‍♂️ dippity 🤮 hippity 🐇 hip hop 🗣🎙🎶; You 👉🏻🧑🏻don't 🙅🏼 really wanna 🚫📝 get into 📍 a pissing match 💦🤼‍♂️ with this 🙋🏼‍♂️ rappity 🗣🎙brat 😈👶🏼 Packing 🧳 a Mac 💻 in the back 🔙 of the Ac 🚗, backpack 🎒 rap 🗣🎙 crap 💩 , yap yap 🗯💬 yackety-yack 🗣🥱 And ➕ at 📍the exact 💯 same time 🕑➿�� I 🙋🏼‍♂️ attempt 🏃🏼these 👉🏻lyrical 📝 acrobat stunts 🤸🏼‍♂️ while I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ practicing 🧐That I'll 🧑🏼still be able 👍🏻 to break 💔 a motherfucking 🧓🏻👉🏻👌🏻 table 🪑 Over the back 🔙 of a couple of faggots 👨🏼‍🤝‍👨🏻 and crack it 🪑 in half 1️⃣➗2️⃣ Only realized 😳 it was ironic 🤭 I 🧍🏼was signed 📋 to Aftermath 🏢🗣🎙 after 🔜 the fact 1️⃣➕1️⃣🔜2️⃣. How could 🤔 I 🙋🏼‍♂️ not blow 💥? All I do 🙋🏼‍♂️💯 is drop F-bombs 🤬🗯💣, feel my wrath 😠 of attack 🔪🙍🏻 Rappers 👱🏻‍♂️🗣🎙 are having a rough time 📉⏱ period 🩸, here's 🤲🏻 a Maxipad 🩹. It's actually 🤓☝🏻 disastrously 🌋🌪 bad 😧😰 For the wack 🥱😴 while I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ masterfully 💯🤷🏼‍♂️👑 constructing 👷🏼‍♂️🛠 this masterpiece 📝🖼 as- I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ beginning 🏁 to feel 🧠 like a Rap God 🗣🎙🤴🏼, Rap God 🗣🎙🤴🏼, All my people 👨‍👩‍👦👨‍👨‍👦‍👦 from the front 🔝to the back 🔙 nod ↪️↩️, back 🔙 nod ↪️↩️. Now 📅 who 👤❓ thinks 🤔💭 their arms 💪🏼 are long 📏 enough to slap 👋🏻 box 🥊, slap 👋🏻 box 🥊? Let me 🙋🏼‍♂️ show 🤲🏻 you 👉🏻🙍🏻maintaining 🧑🏼‍🔧🛠 this shit 💩 ain't 🚫 that 🙅🏼‍♂️ hard 🧱 , that 🙅🏼‍♂️ hard 🧱 Everybody 👨‍👨‍👦‍👦👩‍👩‍👧‍👧🌍 wants 🤲🏻 the key 🔑 and ➕ the secret 📂🤫 to rap 🗣🎙immortality 🚫☠️ like I have got 🙋🏼‍♂️👍🏻 Well, to be truthful 👱🏻‍♂️🖐🏻📖 the blueprint's 📝📃 simply rage 😡 and youthful 👶🏼🧒🏼 exuberance 😄‼️ Everybody 🌎 loves ❤️ to root 🥳🎉 for a nuisance 🤪 Hit 🤜🏻 the earth 🌎 like an asteroid ☄️ did nothing 🙅🏼 but shoot 🏀 for the moon 🌙 since 📆 MC's 🙎🏻‍♂️🗯🎙 get taken 🚕 to school 🏫with this music 🎶 ‘Cause I use it 🙋🏼‍♂️🗯🎙as a vehicle 🚗 to bus 🚌 the rhyme 🎶 Now I 🙋🏼‍♂️ lead a new 🆕 school 🏫 full of students 👨🏻‍🎓👩🏼‍🎓; Me 🧑🏼? I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️a product of Rakim,➕Lakim Shabazz, ➕ 2Pac 🧑🏾‍🦲,➕N.W.A, ➕Cube 🧊, ➕ hey Doc, ➕Ren, ➕Yella, ➕Eazy, thank you 🙏🏻, they got 🔜 Slim 👱🏻‍♂️🙋🏼‍♂️ Inspired 🤩 enough to one day ☝🏻☀️ grow up🧑🏼🔜👱🏻‍♂️, blow up 💣💥 and be in a position 🏢 To meet Run DMC 🏃🏿‍♂️🏃🏿‍♂️🏃🏿‍♂️ and induct them 🧑🏾‍🦲👨🏾‍🦲🧑🏾‍🦲into 🔜 the motherfuckin' 🧓🏻👉🏻👌🏻Rock n' Roll 🎸 Hall of Fame 🏤🤩 Even though I 🙋🏼‍♂️ walk in 🚶🏼‍♂️the church ⛪️ and burst 🧍🏼‍♂️💥 in a ball of flames 🔥🏃🏼‍♂️🔥

Only ☝🏻 Hall of Fame 🏤 I be inducted in 🔜 is the alcohol 🍺 of fame 🤩 On the wall 🧱 of shame 😔 You fags 👉🏻👨🏼‍🤝‍👨🏻 think 🧠💭 it's all 💯 a game 🕹🧩 'til I walk 🚶🏼‍♂️a flock 🐦🐦🐦 of flames 🔥🔥 Off a plank 🏗 and, tell me 🗣🙋🏼‍♂️ what in the fuck 🤨⁉️ are you 👉🏻🧑🏻 thinking 🤔💭 ? Little 🤏🏻 gay 👨🏼‍🤝‍👨🏻 looking 👀 boy 🧑🏻, So gay 📈👨🏼‍🤝‍👨🏻 I 🙋🏼‍♂️ can barely 🙅🏼‍♂️ say it 🗣 with a straight face 😐 looking 👀 boy 🧑🏻 You 👉🏻🧑🏻 witnessing 👀 a mass-occur 😵🔫 Like you 🧍🏻watching 👀 a church gathering ⛪️take place 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 looking 👀 boy 🧑🏻 Oy vey 🔯😦, that boy 🧑🏻is gay 🏳️‍🌈, that's all they 👉🏻👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 say 🗣 looking 👀 boy 🧑🏻. You 👉🏻🧍🏻get a thumbs up 👍🏻 , pat 👋🏻 on the back 🔙, And ➕ a "way to go" 👏🏻👍🏻 from your 🧑🏻 label 🏢 everyday 📆➡️📆 looking 👀 boy 🧑🏻 Hey 👋🏻 looking 👀 boy🧑🏻, what ❓you🧍🏻say 🗣 looking 👀 boy 🧑🏻? I 🙋🏼‍♂️ got a "hell yeah" 🔥👌🏻 from Dre 👨🏾‍🦲 looking 👀 boy 🧑🏻. I'mma 🙋🏼‍♂️ work for 👷🏼‍♂️🗣🎙 everything 💯 I have 🏠🚗💰, Never 🙅🏼‍♂️ask nobody 🚫🗣 for shit 😤, get out of👋🏻👉🏻 my face 👱🏻‍♂️ looking 👀 boy 🧑🏻Basically 💁🏼‍♂️ boy 🧑🏻 you're 👉🏻🧍🏻 never 🙅🏼‍♂️ gonna be capable ✅ of keeping up 🏃🏼‍♂️💨🏃🏻with the same 🚫👱🏻‍♂️ pace 🗣💨🎙 looking 👀 boy 🧑🏻

I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ beginning 🏁 to feel 🧠 like a Rap God 🗣🎙🤴🏼, Rap God 🗣🎙🤴🏼 All my people 👨‍👩‍👦👨‍👨‍👦‍👦 from the front 🔝to the back 🔙 nod ↪️↩️, back 🔙 nod ↪️↩️. The way I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ racing 🏃🏼‍♂️ around the track 🔁 , call me 🤙🏼 Nascar 🏎, Nascar 🏎 Dale Earnhardt 3️⃣👨🏻⚰️ of the trailer park 🚍🏚, the White Trash God 👱🏻‍♂️🗑🤴🏼 Kneel🧎🏻before General Zod ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️🦹🏼‍♂️ this planet’s 🌎 Krypton 🌑, no 🙅🏼 Asgard 🌕, Asgard 🌕 So you 👉🏻🧑🏻 be Thor 🦸🏻🔨 and I'll 🙋🏼‍♂️ be Odin🤴🏼, you 👉🏻 rodent 🙍🏻↔️🐀, I'm 👱🏻‍♂️ omnipotent 🤯 Let off ✋🏻then I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️reloading 🔫immediately‼️with these bombs 💣 I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ totin' 🧳 And I 👱🏻‍♂️ should not 🙅🏼 be woken 😴🚫⏰

I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ the walking 🚶🏼‍♂️dead 😵 but I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️just a talking 🗣 head 👱🏻‍♂️, a zombie 🧟‍♂️ floating 🛫; But I 🙋🏼‍♂️ got your 👉🏻🧑🏻 mom 🧓🏻 deep throating 🍆😮 I'm out my Ramen noodle 🍜 , we 👱🏻‍♂️🧑🏻 have nothing 🙅🏼 in common 🧑🏻🚫👱🏻‍♂️, poodle 🐩, I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ a doberman 🐕, pinch yourself 🧑🏻🤏🏻 in the arm 💪🏼 and pay homage 🙌🏻🙏🏻, pupil 👨🏻‍🎓 It's me 💁🏼‍♂️, my honesty's 🗯💯 brutal 😖 But it's honestly 🗣💯 futile 🚫✏️ if I 🙋🏼‍♂️ don't utilize 🙅🏼 what I do though 🗣🎙For good 👍🏻 at least once☝🏻in a while 📆 So I 🙋🏼‍♂️wanna make sure 🔎✅ somewhere in this 📍 chicken scratch 📝 I scribble 🖊 and doodle 🖍 Enough 📊 rhymes 🗣🎙to maybe 🤷🏼‍♂️ to try and help 🤝🆘 get some people 👨‍👩‍👦 through tough times 🙇🏼‍♂️📉📆 But I 🙋🏼‍♂️ gotta keep ���🏻 a few punchlines 🤣📃 just in case🤞🏻 ‘Cause even you 👉🏻 🧑🏻unsigned 🚫✒️📋 Rappers 🗣🎙are hungry 😠🍽 looking 👀 at me 🙋🏼‍♂️ like it's lunchtime ⌚️📍🕛 I know 🙄 there was 🔚 a time 📆⏰ where once ☝🏻, I 🙋🏼‍♂️ Was king 🤴🏼 of the underground 🏚🚧, but I 👱🏻‍♂️ still 💯 rap 🗣🎙 like I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ on my 🙋🏼‍♂️ Pharoahe Monch 🧔🏿 grind 💯 So I 👱🏻‍♂️ crunch rhymes 🎶, but sometimes ⏰ when you combine ➕ Appeal 👨🏻‍🎤🗣🎙with ➕ this skin color 👱🏻‍♂️ of mine 🙋🏼‍♂️You get too big 📈‼️ and here they come 🏃🏻🏃🏻‍♂️ trying to Censor you 🤭 like that one ☝🏻 line 📝 I 🙋🏼‍♂️ said 🗣 on "I'm Back" 🔥 from the Mathers LP One 💽 when I 🙋🏼‍♂️ tried to say 🗣 "I'll 👱🏻‍♂️ take seven ✋🏻➕✌🏻 kids 👦🏼👧🏼 from Columbine 🏫 Put 'em all 👦🏼👧🏼 in a line 📈, add ➕ an AK-47 🔫4️⃣7️⃣, a revolver 🔫, and ➕ a nine 9️⃣🔫" Let’s🧍🏻🧍🏼‍♂️see 👀 if I 🙋🏼‍♂️ get away 🏃🏼‍♂️ with it 📝 now 📍📅 that I 🙋🏼‍♂️ ain't as big 🙅🏼‍♂️📈 as I was 📈🔜📉, but I'm 👱🏻‍♂️ Morphin' 〽️into an immortal 👱🏻‍♂️🔜🦸🏼coming through 🏃🏼‍♂️the portal 🌀 You're 👉🏻🧑🏻 stuck 😖 in a time warp 🌀⏰ from 2004 🔙📅 though And I don't know 🤷🏼‍♂️ what the fuck 🤨 that you 🧑🏻 rhyme for 🗣🎙❓You're 🙍🏻 pointless 🚫✏️ as Rapunzel 🧝🏻‍♀️ with fucking 👉🏻👌🏻cornrows 🤔 You 🧑🏻write 📝 normal 😐, fuck 🖕🏻being normal 🤪 And I 🙋🏼‍♂️ just brought a new 🆕 Raygun 🔫 from the future 🔜📅 Just to come 💁🏼‍♂️ and shoot ya 🙍🏻💥🔫 like when Fabolous 🧑🏾‍🦲 made Ray J 👨🏾‍🦲 mad 😡, ‘Cause Fab 🧑🏾‍🦲 said 🗣 he 👨🏾‍🦲 looked 👀 like a fag 👬🏾 at Maywhether's 👨🏾‍🦲🥊 pad 🏦 Singin' 🗣🎤🎵 to a man 🧔🏻 while they 🧍🏾‍♂️🧍🏿‍♂️played piano 🎹 Man oh man 😰, that 🔙 was a 24/7 special ☀️🔁🌙 ♾ on the cable channel 📺 So Ray J 👨🏾‍🦲 went straight 🔜💯 to the radio station 📻 the very next day 🔜📅 👨🏾‍🦲🗣🎙 "Hey 👋🏻 Fab 🧑🏾‍🦲, I'mma 🙋🏾‍♂️ kill you 🔪🧑🏾‍🦲" Lyrics 📝 coming at you 🗣🎙at supersonic 🌀 speed 🎶🏃🏼‍♂️💨 Uh 🤔 sama lamaa duma lamaa 🤔🤨 you 🧑🏻 assuming I'm a human 🧍🏼‍♂️ What I 🙋🏼‍♂️ gotta do 🤷🏼‍♂️❓ to get it through 🔜 to you 🧑🏻 I'm superhuman 🦸🏻‍♂️ Innovative 👷🏼‍♂️and I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ made of rubber 💪🏼 So that anything 🗯 you say 🗣 is ricocheting 💢 off of me 💁🏼‍♂️ and it'll glue to you 🙍🏻 I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ devastating 🌪🌋, more 📈than ever 📅 demonstrating 🧑🏼‍🏫 How to give 🤲🏻 a motherfuckin' audience 👨‍👩‍👦‍👦👩‍👩‍👧‍👧 a feeling 🧠 like it's levitating 🛫 Never 🚫 fading 🙅🏼‍♂️📉, and I know 💁🏼‍♂️ that the haters 😡🖕🏻 are forever ♾ waiting 😐⌚️For the day 📅 that they 🙎🏻‍♂️🙎🏻can say 🗣 I 🙋🏼‍♂️ fell off 📉, they'd 🧑🏻🙋🏻‍♂️ be celebrating 🥳🎉 ‘Cause I 🙋🏼‍♂️ know the way 🔜✅ to get 'em 🙎🏻🙎🏻‍♂️ motivated 🏃🏻💯‼️ I 🙋🏼‍♂️ make elevating 😇 music 🎶 , you 👉🏻🧑🏻 make elevator music 😴🎶 “Oh, he's 👱🏻‍♂️ too mainstream 📈” Well, that's what they do 🙎🏻🙎🏻‍♂️when they 🙎🏻‍♂️🙎🏻 get jealous 😤👿 they confuse 🤨⁉️ it 🗣🎙 It's not 🚫 hip hop 🗣🎙, it's pop 🎤👱🏻‍♀️, 'cause I 🙋🏼‍♂️ found 🔎 a hella way 🔥 to fuse it 🎙➕🎤 ➕ With rock 👨🏻‍🎤🎸, shock rap 😧🗣🎙 with Doc 👨🏿‍🦲 Throw on Lose Yourself 💽🔥 and make 'em 🌎 lose it 🤯 “I 🙋🏻‍♂️ don't know 🤷🏻‍♂️ how to make songs 🎶💿 like that 👉🏻👱🏻‍♂️, I don't know 🤷🏻‍♂️ what words 📝 to use 🗣🎙” Let me 🙋🏼‍♂️ know when it occurs 💡 to you 🙎🏻‍♂️ While I'm 💁🏼‍♂️ ripping any one ☝🏻of these verses 📝 that versus 🆚 you 🙋🏻‍♂️, It's curtains 😴, I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️ inadvertently hurtin' 😫 you 🙎🏻‍♂️ How many ❓verses 📝 I 🙋🏼‍♂️ gotta murder 🔪 to Prove ✅that if you 🙎🏻‍♂️were half 1️⃣➗2️⃣ as nice 🙂, your songs 🎶 you 🙎🏻‍♂️can sacrifice 🔥👹 virgins too, uh 😠! School 🏫 flunkie ❎, pill 💊 junky 🧟‍♂️, But look 👀 at the accolades 🥇🏆🏅 the skills 👷🏼‍♂️ brung me 🙋🏼‍♂️🔝Full of myself 🤷🏼‍♂️, but still hungry 😋🍽 I bully myself 🙎🏼‍♂️🖕🏻🙍🏼‍♂️ cause I 🙋🏼‍♂️ make me 👱🏻‍♂️ do what I 🙋🏼‍♂️ put my mind 🧠 to And I'm 🙋🏼‍♂️a million leagues 💯 above you 📈, ill 🤒 when I 🙋🏼‍♂️ speak in tongues 🗣🎙 But it's still tongue 👅 in cheek 😉, fuck you🖕🏻 I'm drunk 🥴 so Satan 👹 take the fucking wheel 🚗 , I'm asleep 😴 in the front seat 💺 Bumping 🔊 Heavy D and the Boys 🔥 Still chunky 🤨 but funky 🎶 But in my 🙋🏼‍♂️ head 🧠 there's something 🤔 I can feel tugging and struggling 😖 Angels 👼😇 fight with devils 👹👺 and, here's what ‼️ they want from me 🙍🏼‍♂️ They’re 👹👼 asking me 👱🏻‍♂️ to eliminate ❌ some 📊 of the women 🙎🏼‍♀️ hate 😠🖕🏻But if you 👉🏻 take into consideration 🤔 the bitter 😡 hatred 🤬 I have 🙋🏼‍♂️Then you may 🤷🏼‍♂️ be a little 🤏🏻 patient 🙇🏻 and more sympathetic 😕 to the situation 🙍🏼‍♂️ And understand 💡 the discrimination🖕🏻👩🏼‍🦰 But fuck it 🤷🏼‍♂️🖕🏻, life's handing you lemons 🍋? make lemonade 🥤 then ‼️ But if I 🙋🏼‍♂️ can't 🙅🏼‍♂️ batter 🤜🏻 the women 👱🏻‍♀️, how the fuck 🤔 am I 🙋🏼‍♂️ supposed to bake 👨🏼‍🍳🔥 them 👩🏼 a cake 🎂 then? Don't 🙅🏼‍♂️ mistake 🔀 it 🙋🏼‍♂️ for Satan 👹. It's a fatal ☠️ mistake if you 👉🏻 think 🤔💭 I 🙋🏼‍♂️need to be overseas 🌊🚢 And take a vacation 🏝🏖 to trip 🦵🏻🏃🏼‍♀️a broad 👱🏻‍♀️, And make her 🙎🏼‍♀️ fall on her face 🙍🏼‍♀️ And don't 🙅🏼‍♂️ be a retard 🤪🥴, Be a king 🤴🏼? Think 🤔 not 🙅🏼‍♂️, why be a king 👑❓when you 🙋🏼‍♂️ can be a God 🙋🏼‍♂️?

Submitted May 11, 2020 at 10:26AM by blueberry_five via reddit https://ift.tt/3cjnLNs

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

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A post shared by ABC World News Tonight (@abcworldnewstonight) on Apr 6, 2020 at 12:14pm PDT

The curve flattened I'm told due to evaporation.

Evaporation is allowed to occur when 3 or more people in one house have COVID-19 and give consent to immediate travel to their home place -- some aliens prefer not to call it a planet but it is

So when they are diagnosed they are sent home in NY state including NYC. And so it's made s remarkable difference in numbers.

The evaporation numbers are electronically recorded live in a databank

So dead bodies to dinosaurs and handle that nasty drama or evaporation and hands free and clean.

And as a doctor or nurse, "you are diagnosed with COVID-19. You will have an adventurous future. Please go home and enjoy your ride. Here's two prescriptions to help you on your life's journey"

I mean really. Try a little flavor.

"Bitch you gonna die yo! Here take this pill so you shut the fuck up while you dien' ain't no one wanna hear you yo! And push this down and suck when you be coughin like you dyin cause you will!!" I mean i Don't even care. What are they gonna do? Complain? When? They about to die. In case they do "I explained the medication use and how to and when to and I said the future is different than it is now. And i need a break. Care to join me away from this soon to be home individual?" now its only for now and i really don't recommend you to talk to someone like that except people like me, just wanna punch some fucking ass holes in the face.

Besides some people find that kind of interaction comical and they actually do prefer it to normal doctor talk. Its humbling. Some get upset like Denise.

And i just walked by Uncle Dad and he said to her when she borrowed $2000 from me and lied it was for bills but it was so she could go to Hawaii and she said "just between you and me i borrow this Don't tell dad" and she was talking about it because I walked by and he said "yeah Denise just between you and me You got a bloody broken nose"

Because he wanted me and my daughter to go. And she borrowed almost all my savings and i didn't have enough for 3 plane tickets to Hawaii when she already had $2,000 and 2 paychecks go in and had over $6000 of her own money on the trip after bills paid. So she had $8000...

And i couldn't go. She she got a busted nose. She was until 6 months ago assisted leader of Zulululu on Eaerth.

She insisted that Nathaniel try to initiate sex with me at that time and lost her rulership.

Because in reality she told him to rape me. That's what she fucking did.

Anyway point. If someone talks in a different manner to a COVID than usual. But isn't abusive as i was not abusive in the passage above i expect it to be excused and accepted and discontinued soon. As it is ONLY for COVID-19 activated and not carriers (which will only show up in DNA4U)

A lot of people The most strong people have been invaded by aliens. The strongest.

And we been beat down. Over and over.

I'm gonna pull out the NHRA because some of them kids are real special to me.

32% are human. 92% of the remaining percentage are alien. That's just the drivers.

72% of mechanics are human. 4% of the remaining are alien. (Cause they're fucking lazy -- not just an opinion)

The rest evil humans.

So of 600 drivers... Take 32 times 6 and you got some fucking number i ain't a calculstor but it's about 3x6 is 18 plus in the ones column 2x6 plus Yoir carry.

192 I'm assuming out of 600.

So that totally isn't right. 32% of drivers. 1/3 of 600 is 200

Fuck tree msn noe he says there's 900 drivers. Makes me laugh

So over 300... Why does the calculator say 288??

Why does this not work? 32% oh is not 33.333% it's less than im all thinking 30% is 1/3.

Fuxk math.

I'm sloppy in math. I have good humor about it tho and tree gets a good chuckle at me because I get so dumb about it. I was looking for 35% which is about 315.

See why Yall need 8 hours or more of restful sleep? Denise kept me up all night acting stupid screaming and then Nathaniel woke me up early worried about his livelihood. So i got me like 4 or 5 hours.

So 288 people surrounded by 900 people.

This is often the case then the remaining (i have a calculator here) 612 people try to drag down the 288 i can clearly see that they are outnumbered by over double

So that is a two on one unfair fight. Two not even being allowed to be on the fucking planet!!

And the one alone to stand or ball up to defend is nearly defenseless.

Then in the NHRA to make matters worse the aliens lie and manipulate to get their mechanics behind them.

So i developed a system that the driver team that wants to fight fights as a team and they have to pay real cash money starting at $10,000 that just goes up and up. If they intend to fight a human and Easter Egg occurs and the aliens that put up the bounty to warrior can't fight and must award all cash to the human ran team. Like Erica Enders.

And if she catches you talking shit after the cash award (usually a wire payment) and she will. She racks up fees and fines aka charges. Then she can beat the shit outta the alien team that has to stand there with their hands at their sides or in their pockets after the pockets are cleared by the awarded team and each person gets 5 hits to the face or ribs then the shit talker gets 10 from each team member from the human side.

Since 2013.

Aliens do not belong on Earth. Many of the drivers are the worst offenders of human trafficking which is why They are allowed in the NHRA so we can spy on them and is why rhe mechanics are so many humans.

Because by default humans hate aliens. Its just a distaste we are programmed and then we feel sorry for them for our programmed hate..

It is a very vicious cycle and very painful. Because we can't stand the way they act or dress or the way they're so fucking happy. And its because they lie and hide who they are from us and we feel it.

Thus the distaste

No matter how hard we try to like them and enjoy being with them the hiding and lying over and over of their true identity is terrible.

Queen hid from me her identity and I was all who the fuck are you? Like it wasn't like i would be rammed if i asked.

She said "pardon?"

And i was like oh shit and i got all red... And i was all oh im sorry I should not talk to her like that she's elder and proper! So i said "im sorry ma'am i was Just wondering who you were"

"Well I'm the fucking Queen!!"

I must had looked like a turnip by then all the blood rushing to my face to feed my brain.

"Of who?! What? Where?!"

"Of England" and she folded her hands in her lap on one side and looked all dignified.

Holy fucking shit who would thought?! Not me!

But an alien will lie "I'm just like you but ...." And never dignify themselves to say they are alien. And it is irritating.

When Queens or Kings don't announce themselves its full of mystery and wonder.

When an alien DOES then it's full of mystery and wonder.

When they don't it's absolutely full blown annoying.

Sometimes we can act like children and allow a person to follow us around and copy every move like the other kid doesn't know how to live. But there comes a point even a child will explode in temper.

They just don't fit on our planet!

Even Venus. Neptune and Mars when they transferred to human Because they earned the right by following the rules we still had to tweak their brains and look and so on.

Neptune looked like Ewoks. They were so fucking cute!!! I love Ewoks. I slept with one forever in my bed when i was a kid - a stuffed one from the store.. A fake non living one. I didn't know. I just felt a lot of love.

And i was being really abused by Denise and Nathaniel and i felt really better to,wake up to its cute little face. It was the one thing Denise didn't try to destroy because she knew the truth about them but she sure didn't tell me.

So although I have and the whole human race has a severe dislike and distaste for the alien race I did ensure that their deaths are one I would want for myself. For my children. For the proper Queen of England who can joke around and make my body feed my brain to keep me alive for one more day.

Something kind.

Evaporation is a slight accordion feeling mainly in the chest and then off they go.

So no one intended for Donald Trump to be running his mouth telling people not to listen to me

Simple bronchitis treatment then home to their families to discuss the ability to leave and when and where. And apparently there's a website you can organize yourselves on so you don't go alone.

I have tried every other way and it was unsuccessful.

I'm not destroying my own planet that was a gift because some aliens are fucking rude.

Im just gonna send their asses home as i should have done long ago.

Its not about being bitter or wanting revenge.

Simple fact is they don't belong here and they have their own home and their own Gods.

Its straining for their Gods to switch between their home and here.

Not my creation. Not my responsibility.

Not the nurses nor doctor nor military.

Not the mailmans nor Amazon's.

When yall voted for an American Revolutionary War 76% voted yes. Of the world wide population of nurses and doctors and health cate professionals 81.5% voted yes. Over 81% voted for a Revolution

So i expect no problems from now and the next 13 days.

24% of Y'all were probably aliens. Tree says... 16 and a half % which then leaves probably evil humans. Snd tree says yes.

So 100% of Humans says yes fuck this shit.

So y'all drink your grocery store wine. Have your cheese. Leave me some extra sharp cheddar but get you some too and get your ice cream. Buckle down and take your tests for money to buy all that. Don't pay no rent nor mortgage

We will talk to car loans i expect. Talk to your car loan providers. I don't want no dude towing your car cause he know it's at home and you didn't pay the monthly payment.

So use your DNA4U to pay your car loans and car insurance and get your food..

Don't be paying baggers online. I got a couple I follow here on Tumblr always a medical or food need. Go on the street corner and work for that yo.

They can get same as you to take a test

Get your student loans deferred.

If you have no DNA4U access and you did and you got an email saying why then you're leaving the planet So click the link and make your arrangements to get on your way.