#I have food poisoning and made myself cry writing this

[hom3landr]

He hears you cry at night sometimes, when you think he’s asleep. You’ll bury your face in his chest as your shoulders shake with silent sobs. It’s usually after he lets something slip about his childhood…about his time in the bad room. The initial flash of pain in your eyes is always brief, quickly smoothed over by a kind word and a hand in his hair. You try to sweep negative emotions under the rug, as though you think you’re protecting him. Self introspection is not something he’s good at but even he knows that it’s because he’s not capable of providing the comfort you need. He’s happy to preen under your hands instead.

But it does start to concern him when he’s being woken up by the smell of your tears more often than not. He doesn’t need to look at the clock tonight to know it’s late. You’re clinging to him like he’s the only thing keeping you afloat. Your face is hot and puffy with despair. His chest tightens as he watches you without your walls up. Why won’t you share this with him? Do you not think he can handle it? (Can he?)

He gently runs his hand down your spine and you jolt like you’ve just been shocked. You wiggle out of his grasp before he can keep you pressed against him. You try to wipe the tears from your cheeks but it’s a sisyphean task as your eyes continue to well and sting. Your heart is beating like a rabbit’s from being caught and your insistence on trying to hide again causes the tightness to turn to anger. You owe him the truth. Why is everyone always keeping secrets from him?

He grabs your wrist harshly and rougher than he intends to and your squeal of pain makes him withdraw like he’s been burned. It’ll only bruise but it reminds him of how unequal the power balance between the two of you is. You don’t look angry at him. You just look sad and numb and that’s somehow worse. He doesn’t know what to do and the angry flame burns brighter in his chest at how unfair everything is. Your relationship is perfect so why can’t things just be happy for once? Why does it always end this way?

Despite nursing your sore wrist, he can see your expression soften. He knows this look. You’re about to put on your mask again. You’re going to sooth him until he’s cooing under your touch and he forgets all about it. He doesn’t want that. You’re constantly ripping away his walls and exposing that raw aching weakness inside him. You cradle it like it’s a fragile bird. He could tear your arm from your body like ripping apart wrapping paper but he can’t make you trust him the way he does you. It doesn’t matter if he’d only be able to handle it with clumsy hands. At least it would be something honest.

“I’m sorry,” you sniffle. “I didn’t mean to wake you up”

“Why are you crying?” He demands. Your shoulders slump at the harshness in his tone. There’s a split second where he hates you. He fucking hates you because you’re supposed to be different.

“I love you. I love you so much that I don’t know how to handle it sometimes,” You confess weakly. It’s true. You aren’t lying.

His brow furrows in confusion as tears continue to roll down your cheeks. You’d just told him you loved him. Loving him wasn’t supposed to make you sad. He opens his mouth to reply but you gently hush him. His teeth clench in annoyance but his response dies in his throat.

“It’s not fair. Any of it. I want to help but I can’t. I can’t change anything. You tell me these horrible things and I can only sit there and run my fucking fingers through your hair like that makes what happened to you better. I watch you be cruel. I watch you hurt and hurt other people. It’s just one huge fucked up cycle and the sad thing is that I’m terrified that one day you won’t need me anymore. You come home with blood on your hands and my first thought isn’t to worry about the person that blood belongs too.” You choke out your confession, finally allowing your pain to surface. Homelander recognizes this emotion but it isn’t the one he expected. You feel guilty, as though you blame yourself for the havoc he wrecks. Oddly, it hurts less than he thought it would.

He understands guilt, even if he’s not sure he’s ever truly felt it. He’s protected from it. Slowly over the years it had been beat out of him. Knowing that’s what has you so distraught makes him chuckle. It’s such a human emotion. Your guilty conscious is comforting to him. You wouldn’t feel guilty for the actions that he commits if you were planning on leaving him. It’s flattering really, that you suffer for him so. It is a form of love in itself. He certainly prefers it over fear.

You’re panting heavily in the wake of your confession, body tense as you prepare for his reaction. He knows you aren’t scared, just prepared for battle. He gently reaches for your injured wrist, bringing it up to his lips to kiss the already swelling bruise. You sigh at his caresses, relieved that there will be no argument tonight. You follow his lead tentatively as he tugs you against him.

“Babe, I don’t know how to break this to you but you look like a fucking chipmunk when you cry.” He laughs, holding you tight against him even as you angrily try to shuffle away.

“I bare my soul to you and that’s how you reply?” You huff, the sadness in your voice is replaced with righteous anger. Good. Homelander considers anger to be a very useful emotion. It easily hides all the unpleasant ones that hurt a little too much to think about. That’s how he’s survived so long. Anger is healing…or at least it’s a band-aid to keep the wound from leaking. Not that he has ever needed a band-aid or had an injury that needed tending. He just knows that anger and cold calculated spite feels comforting, like a warm (blue) blanket around his shoulders. He can give that to you.

“Also, you got snot all over my suit so you’re gonna owe me for the dry cleaning bill.” He ducks his head to avoid a swat. He forgot how cute you are when you’re angry. It’s like watching a kitten hiss and spit.

“You’re an asshole!” You wriggle and pound on his chest but he refuses to let you go.

“Mmmhmm but you love me. You can’t take it back now.” He purrs against your ear. You grumble, caught in your own trap. It’s not like you’d be able to deny it anyway. How could you not love him? Even when it hurts you, you press on anyway. It almost makes everything he’s endured worth it…almost.

You don’t cry at night after that, even if the emotions are still bubbling under the surface. He doesn’t know if it’s because talking helped, or you simply became more clever about hiding it. It doesn’t matter anyway. You love him. You love him and he loves you. This love is immolating and painful but beautiful. If he’s being honest…he’s glad to know that you’re as raw and undone as he is. He promises himself that he’ll be as careful with your weakness as you are with his. He owes you that much.

[xelle-ll]

hello~ can i request a xavier x reader(that isn’t the mc), so reader got sick but xavier left her to go take care of the mc instead.. i’m a sucker for readers that aren’t mc troupes since i can never see myself in them🥲

A/N: YES! Okay I will be making this so incredibly angsty. If you don’t like the way it goes (because I took a lot of liberties I feel 👀) you are more then welcome to send another request with more detail. I personally like this a lot lmao but I love heart wrenching writing a lot.

Dividers by @saradika-graphics

3 years of dating and just today there was this feeling like you couldn’t do this anymore…

You had gotten horrible food poisoning, spent 4 hours throwing up with dizziness like you had never felt before.

When there was a second of stability, the first call went to Xavier. He would come asap when he heard. You were so incredibly happy when he picked up the phone. The worry in his voice made your heart feel like it was flying.

You went to bed because he would be here soon. Warmth and excitement in your chest despite how sick you felt.

Only… he wasn’t going to come…

The time went past so quickly yet so slowly. One second you were awake and the minutes passed like hours. The nausea and migraine making everything impossible. The next, you were asleep, unknowing of how many hours were passing.

It was miserable.

There was no feeling of hunger. No feelings at all actually other then pain and the burning in the back of your throat. Even in sleep, the pain came through. There wasn’t a moment of rest in any state.

Every now and then, you felt the emptiness next to you. Remembered he wasn’t here. The tears came on their own, unwilling to stop. It didn’t help how much your head was throbbing. Like your brain wanted to shatter the skull containing it and escape.

The crying made the throbbing worse.

And now your heart had been broken too.

After who knows how long, you got the energy to pick up your phone again. The realisation came, It had been 8 hours since the call.

Tears welled up in your eyes again, getting in the way of the notification on your screen. It took a minute but when you could see again, you saw that he had sent a text.

“have to go Mc needs me Theres a group of vv strong wanderers and the situation might get dangerous I’ll get back to u after my love”

It would be like a stab to your heart if you didn’t already feel it break hours ago. You felt too weak to even make excuses for him. There was no energy left.

Would you ever hold even a candle to her…?

Please make sure to like and repost! It helps get my work out there :))

Part 2

[lady-potato-ninja]

Prowling the inbox like a half tame thing, just confessing that I saw your art tutorials and was like "Neat!" and then saw the potato in the name and that clinched it for me <3 /origin story sharing for free!

Anyway! I'm asking you to this dance of an ask game, because I enjoy the stories in the tags you write and then I was like, there is a function built in for being more candid~ Please tell me more lady-potato-ninja lore, as they say. ^^ Referring to this post here: >> https://www.tumblr.com/shreedle/762344461629112320?source=share <<

🧠🌂👀🌹 Okay bye! See you on the dashboard!

Ah 🙈🙈🙈 I'm so glad you liked my tutorials! I am actually in the mist of making a new one on how to better your artistic workflow! I'm not done yet- still trying to make it make sense but I hope it might help you in some way once it's out😉!

🧠- What fictional character do you relate to the most?

I’m gonna be extra because you said you liked my rambling and go for more than one character. I’ve mostly been into podcast fandoms thus far and it feels like those characters were really easy to relate to.

Mollymauk Tealeaf from Critical Role: I learned so much about myself throught this character. He’s the embodiment of change and self-love and just living life the way you want it. I was very envious of the joyful way he lived his life and it stayed with me long after I stopped watching Critical Role and I feel like now I got to this point where I love myself and the multitude ways in which I change everyday.

Martin Blackwood from the Magnus Archive: I think we’re awfully similar; in a made from the same cloth kind of way. He’s a very attentive character who tries his best to provide help, care and support to the people around him and it’s something I pride myself to do as well, one of my friends said I was an approachable person and I wear this quality as a badge of honor. I strive to be a kind-hearted person.

At a time, I was also really relating to his loneliness which I sometimes still am. Hearing about how he felt made me realise that I felt the same about me. And it actually made me take care of myself more because I couldn’t let such a deep sadness continue on in me! But don’t fret, now I’m a much happier person and I feel like it’s in part because of him, weirdly enough.  

Jang Hee-Soo from the kdrama Moving: This kdrama is so good and it really struck a chord with me for multiple reasons but mostly because I had never seen a media better portray the relationship between a parent and their child.

With her dad, Jang Hee-Soo sees what he does for her and his sacrifices and she understands him, she takes the time to know her dad as a person more than just a parental figure and she tries to give back and sacrifice what she can to help him. I feel like it’s the same way I love and cherish my parents. I see myself in the careful way she takes care of him while supporting his dreams and cheering him on. (It honestly made me cry and that’s why I haven’t finished this series yet I KEEP CRYING!)

She also has this whole motif about rage that really speaks to me. A part of me is like a fire that is inextinguishable and she’s the same.

Special mention to Hong Cha-young from Vincenzo because my gf said I was like her > The style, the goofiness and the evil not evilness🙈

🌂- You have to choose three fiction characters to help you survive in the apocalypse, who are you picking?

Senshi from delicious in dungeon: I need someone who knows enough about fauna and flora to know which plants/animal parts are good to eat in the wild and which ones are poisonous! I know how to cook and bake well enough but not enough to utilize everything in the best way and how to keep food well stocked. I feel like we would get along well plus he would remind me to actually eat and drink which is fairly important.

Aragorn from LOTR: Having a ranger in the team is essential because I lack most of what he has to offer and while Senshi might cover a similar ground, I feel like Aragorn would be helpful in many other ways such as, finding/creating shelter and keeping us from getting lost. He would be longing for his wife; I would be longing for my wife; we would be partners in long lost love stories.

Doctor Mccoy from Star Trek: I know how to give first aid + CPR, take care of burn wounds and other small wounds but in this situation, I feel like a real doctor should be a part of the team. Plus, Bones is used to critical situations with the amount of bathshit crazy things happening on the enterprise and he quickly adapts to changes. He also has great bedside manners so if I end up dying well at least my last moments will be nice lol. I almost forgot his massive balls of steel – this man is unshakable!

I think we would make the dream team: I know how to fish, mend/make (bad) clothes, bake and cook, ect. And three out of four of us know how to fight: I am a green belt in karate + I can throw handheld axes; Senshi has his axe + his shield/cauldron and Aragorn got his sword skills. I mean we’re pretty much covered in terms of leadership, nutrition, health, living quarters, troc strategies and defense… We could survive this!

👀 -Most tame ship you enjoy

Daisuga? Maybe? It’s very soft, they’re basically already married at this point lol. It’s a sweet, no conflict ship!

🌹 - What's a small fanbase you're a part of?

Gekkan Shojo Nozai kun: I watch this every summer and I can’t wait to see more if there’ll ever be more…. It’s just such a charming and chaotic show! The characters all have hilarious gimmicks that make them so endearing and you just want to see them succeed. It’s honestly really worth the watch if you haven’t seen it already!

Professor Layton: I think about replaying the games every other week < I could ‘cause I still have my DS and multiple games but I want to be able to cast it on the TV so I can play with my gf or watch her play!

[chicgeekgirl89]

2023 Writing Roundup

Thanks to @liminalmemories21 and @ladytessa74 for the tags!

I guess the next time I'm mad at myself for not writing more I'll just...tell myself to shut up lol. Holy heck this is a lot of fic.

January

Paper Rings- A 5+1 of Tarlos wedding planning. I adore this one.

Packing a Piece- Early days Tarlos, T.K. taking care of Carlos as his feelings grow stronger.

My Pain Fits in the Palm of Your Freezing Hand- What a labor of love, Carlos' POV during the Ice Storm arc.

February

I Get it From You- 5+1 of habits the boys have picked up from each other. So fun to write!

Will You Take What's Left of Me?- Me trying to figure out the mess of Carlos having a secret wife 🙄

Like I'm Gonna Lose You- T.K. saving Carlos' life after his abduction and the aftermath.

Glitter and Be Gay- This one is so freaking funny lol. Carlos hates glitter and he suffers because of it. T.K. is amused.

How to Say Goodbye- My last NCIS LA Densi fic. That fandom has meant the world to me and I'm sad the show is over.

March

Love is Sitting on the Bathroom Floor- T.K. has food poisoning, Carlos takes care of him, it's so sweet!

The Luck O' the Irish- I truly love how this one turned out, my little fic about Tarlos doing a class project with their child in the future and Carlos being a neurotic dad lol.

April

I Won't Say I'm in Love- Carlos falling in love with T.K., Adriana and Francesca being their best/worst selves. This one has some of the best dialogue, god they're fun.

Mothers and Sons- Andrea caring for T.K. as they wedding plan. Made myself cry with this one.

May

Shiner- Coda for 4x15, Carlos finding out about T.K.'s black eye and taking care of him.

A Helping Hand- Lololol a fic based on my real life experience with rain and smoke detectors.

June

Happy Campers- Boys camping trip with whumped Carlos is just what the summer ordered!

July

We Have Suffered Enough- 4x16 post-ep. God did they really need the Huntington's scare?!

Day Zero- T.K. struggles after being drugged by Sadie.

August

Saturday Night's All Right for Fighting- This might be the best fic of the year. Mama and Papa Reyes getting into trouble at a bar with T.K. and poor Carlos having to sort it all out is the stuff my dreams are made of.

September

Rugby King- My sweet, sweet Heartstopper boys. I was so nervous writing this fic and I'm so glad I did. Whumpy Nick and worried Charlie are such perfection and it was so fun to jump into this fandom!

October

Come Sail Away- My magnum opus for this year lol. The longest thing I've written to date and a love letter to the drama and antics of Below Deck. Also my first AU! (Technically...)

November

Tío T.K.- T.K. being a freaking badass and helping Carlos' nephew. Adriana and Francesca return. A joy from start to finish.

Phew! What a year! Thanks to everyone who has read my work this year!

Tagging @lemonlyman-dotcom, @bonheur-cafe, @carlos-in-glasses, and @thisbuildinghasfeelings!

[missmaywemeetagain]

Moonlight, A Pink Scarf Universe Story

A/N: So, I was challenged to do a prompt game, and since I'm desperately trying to fight my perfectionism and become more consistent with my writing, I took on the challenge and wrote this dramatic little heartbreaker this afternoon just under the wire like crazy person. I hope you enjoy this short, barely edited extension of Pink Scarf. It takes place a few months after the Christmas 1960 flashback in Part 16. (Please go easy on me because it is literally the least revised/edited thing I've ever put out and I desperately hope you like it 💗)

Thanks to @thatbanditqueen @whositmcwhatsit @ellie-24 @from-memphis-with-love @be-my-ally and @vintageshanny for challenging me to do this even when I wanted to convince myself I couldn't do it.

Prompt: “Do you mind? I came here to get away from other people.”

Rating: PG-13 || Word Count: 2k

TW: Miscarriage, medical trauma, angst, depression, intrusive thoughts

Moonlight

Hawaii, March 1961

The room is pressing in on you with all these jovial faces, celebrating in paradise after Elvis’ successful benefit concert for the Pearl Harbor Arizona Memorial. You should be celebrating with them.

You wish you could.

Instead, you are fighting back tears, praying that no one notices your frantic need to escape the otherwise wonderful atmosphere.

Elvis decided to bring you all along for a month-long vacation of sorts as he films his newest picture, Blue Hawaii, and performs the benefit concert to raise money for the Memorial. Y’all need some rest and recreation, he’d said joyfully, his eyes falling on you in particular, and how could you possibly refuse? It genuinely seemed like a great idea, even though he’d technically be working, and so would Jack by extension, but a change of scenery would do you some good after everything that's happened. Maybe you and Jack could reconnect on the tropical getaway, you’d thought.

But so much had happened since you agreed to this trip.

No one knew, of course. Not Jack. Not your family. Certainly not Elvis. You had made sure of it because you couldn’t stand the hopeful looks that would have come with the news, and the inevitable pity that would’ve come after.

The humid Hawaiian air coupled with the room full of people makes you feel as though you can’t draw a full breath. Lightheaded, you push your way through the throng of people filling the lavish home that had been rented for the express purpose of Elvis being able to stay comfortable and private during his shooting schedule. It’s an incredible relief once you burst out onto the patio, then stumble down the sandy path to the breathtaking beach.

Surprisingly, there’s not a soul on the moonlit sand, and for that you are eternally grateful because you cannot hold back your choked sobs any longer. The ebb and flow of the surf crashes over your crying, and you very much wish you could drown your sorrows in the vastness of the ocean in front of you.

Getting pregnant again was not even something you thought was possible. It was cruel, you thought, that you’d nearly made it 12 weeks this time before your body decided that it would reject the baby. You had just started to really, truly think it would be different this time. You were getting ready to tell Jack. You were almost, almost happy.

Even more cruel was that it was almost a year to the day of you bleeding out on the floor of the Rollerdome.

In some ways you’d been thankful that everyone had been so busy preparing for the trip that no one paid much mind to the fact that you locked yourself in the bathroom for hours, silently sobbing through the cramping and the bleeding and the clotting. You’d known then it was too late.

Tears stream down your cheeks as you hug your knees and begin to rock in the soft sand. At least it’s beautiful here, you think absently, trying to soothe yourself.

You’d taken to bed, claiming a bout of food poisoning, and no one was the wiser, being as excited and busy as they were. Not one of them seemed to bat an eye or think it was strange that no one else had any symptoms. A small part of you breaks a little at that, feeling more alone in the world than you ever have. But another part figures it’s just as well. Perhaps it is a blessing that no one knew of your latest failure. Honestly, you so were disappointed in yourself over it all you didn’t think could handle that disappointment from others, especially Jack.

Two days after losing your second child, you’d gotten on the plane to come here, spending hours upon hours with a false smile spread across your features. Maybe if you smiled enough you’d start to believe it. After all, you were in paradise with Elvis Presley. Millions would kill to be where you are.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Be grateful for what you have, you berate yourself, as you have more than once on the trip. Not even the stunning beauty of the island has been able to push your thoughts away from your loss, your seemingly unending sorrow permeating even the most beautiful of sunsets.

The only moment when you’d felt truly free of it had been watching Elvis’ concert earlier. He was so mesmerizing that it was impossible not to be caught up in his performance. You’d been happy for the momentary distraction, for the way your heart had flip flopped a little at the sight of him in his element, sweaty and feeding off the crowd effortlessly. It was easy to get swept away amongst all the screaming fans, to understand why the man you’d called a friend was the sensation that he was, and to forget everything but him for just a little while.

But by the time this stupid afterparty rolled around, the dark cloud that followed you this past year found you once more, and you were honestly too tired to push it away any longer.

You can’t help thinking how you should have an infant with you now, that in a kinder world you’d have your baby and perhaps another on the way. But the world is not always kind. Instead you are empty and alone.

So you find yourself sobbing on a gorgeous beach in Hawaii in the middle of the night, finally allowing yourself to sit in the grief of your misfortune.

You’re not sure how long you’ve been out here before his tall, lanky frame towers over you, interrupting your grief so suddenly that you find yourself livid.

You furiously swipe the tears from your cheeks, knowing your makeup is smearing but not having the energy or wherewithal to care. “Do you mind? I came here to get away from other people,” you snap.

Even in the darkness, you see how taken aback he is by your anger, his pretty face shifting from surprise to annoyance.

“Is that any way to talk to the guy who brought you to this beautiful place?” Elvis says lightly, but you can hear the edge in his tone. He’s not used to people speaking like that to him, least of all you.

Honestly, you’re not really sure when you last spoke to him at all. Since your strange little embrace on Christmas, he’d taken to avoiding you most of the time, yet again. Coupled with how empty you felt from your miscarriages, the fact that your friend had been so obviously (and seemingly purposefully) absent from your life in the past year was heartbreaking in its own right. It was like a slap in the face on top of your other failures, so far from the unbridled excitement he’d shown when he’d discovered your first pregnancy before anyone else had. So far from the love and care and attention he’d given you before.

You’re not sure you really understood how much it bothered you until this very moment. His sudden entitlement for attention and gratefulness makes your blood boil.

You pop up off the sand, pushing your windblown hair out of your face. “Oh, yes, how sorry I am that not every one of my thoughts is about your stunning generosity, your majesty,” you say sarcastically, viciously, before turning to stomp down the beach away from him. You’ve never, ever spoken to him this way, to anyone this way, but the darkness of your sorrow has flared into something else entirely, this blistering anger threatening to swallow you whole and take Elvis with you.

“Excuse me?” he says indignantly, grasping your arm and whipping you back to face him. His eyes flash in the darkness, both in confusion and with warning.

“Don’t touch me!” you spit, ripping your arm out of his grasp.

“What has gotten into you? What the hell did I do?” he shouts, his voice raising over the surf.

“Not everything is about you, Elvis!” you scream back at him.

For a second, it looks as if you’ve slapped him across the face, with the way his eyes widen in surprise.

You pause for a moment, breath heaving, before continuing. “And since when do you even care what’s going on with me?”

 “W-What are ya talkin’ about? O-Of course I care! I-I-I brought ya on this trip, d-d-didn’t I?” The emotions fly over his features so quickly it makes it too hard to discern what he’s thinking, but his stutter belies his frustration.

“You’ve barely talked to me in a year, Elvis. Can’t imagine why I’d think you care,” you scoff.

His eyes go dark, then blank, that Hollywood mask of his sliding over his features. “You’re nuts! You’re just bein’ crazy…” he starts, shaking his head.

“Yeah, I must be. I must be crazy thinkin’ my friend might give me the time of day after…everything that’s happened,” you hiss back.

Elvis blinks, his long lashes fanning over his cheekbones. You don’t know if he’s finally done the math in his head, figuring out that you nearly died and lost your baby almost exactly a year ago. Or maybe, like he’d somehow known you were pregnant the first time, he gleans some supernatural understanding of what might be happening with you now. Either way, his gaze softens dramatically.

“Oh, honey,” he says, “I didn’t—”

Yeah, you didn’t, you think bitterly. He didn’t do a lot of things. He wasn’t even there after you almost died. But you suppose being a star of his caliber didn’t leave him much time to slum it with you, not anymore. And why would he want to? Not when you’ve been depressed and have already failed at the one thing you felt you were created to do as a woman.

“Just leave me alone, E. You’ve gotten good at that,” you mutter, angry tears filling your eyes, turning away from him to stare out into the churning waves.

You can’t look at him. But you feel the heat of his eyes, nonetheless.

“Don’t do that, y/n,” he says quietly.

“Don’t do what? Speak the truth?”

“You don’t know what you’re talkin’ about,” he growls.

He doesn’t get to be angry. Not about this.

“No, you don’t know, Elvis. You have no idea what it’s been like, you couldn’t. And you haven’t even tried…” you trail off, shaking your head.

You know that’s a lie. Whatever had happened between you on Christmas had been something, as much as you’d tried to deny it and forget his strange behavior. Perhaps that had been him trying.

Suddenly, more than anything, you want him to pull you into his arms like he did that night three months ago. You want him to comfort you and let you sob against his chest, to inhale the distinct scent of him as the heat of his lean body presses into yours. You want the desperate tension that is climbing between you to shatter you and make you forget that the past year had ever happened.

But instead of drawing you close, you watch him put distance between you. You feel as he fortifies that invisible wall he’s built between you this past year. It’s only in the depths of his churning cobalt eyes that you see something akin to apology, along with something deeper that neither of you truly wants to unpack.

Then, Elvis shutters that churning away, his fist clenching and unclenching in time with his jaw. “Yeah, I guess not. I’ll leave ya alone, then.” And he turns and walks away.

Oh god. You feel as though you’ve been hit in the chest, pain radiating inexplicably through your torso, the claws of his dismissal ripping through your insides. You don’t know why. You wanted him to go, and he went.

You sink down into the sand, fresh tears pooling in your eyes, and you wish more than anything that the ocean would just swallow you whole.

Taglist:

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[thelesbstrosity]

MY GOOD OMENS 2 LIVE REACTIONS FOR EVERY EPISODE

So ofc spoilers

Good Omens 2

Episode 1:

- THEY KNEW EACH OTHER AS ANGELS

- Crowley is so proud of his universe and nebulas

- STILL NOT GETTING HIS PRE-FALL NAME

- the reverse wing cover in comparison to season 1

- maggie is a gay disaster

- gabriel walking naked through town to the bookshop had me cry laughing

- crowley living in his car? the plants in the back seat

- myself vs ourselves 😩

- the husbands™️ are fighting 😭

- FORCED PROXIMITY LESBIANS?!

- DISABLED ANGEL I LOVE IT

- the apology dance

- them treating Gabriel like a pet you’re hiding from your parents

Episode 2

- HIS CHILDREN?!

- MORE MURIEL

- Gabriel’s hair in the past 😂

- Heaven takes part in the bystander effect fr fr

- Crowley sleeping in his Bentley

- A JUKEBOX THAT BUDDY HOLLY’S RECORDS LIKE THE BENTLEY

- Greetings “I’m Jim”

- THE FLY

- Plan “Get the lesbians together”

- STANDING IN THE RAIN LIKE IN SEASON 1, EPISODE 1

- A CLUE

- my head can’t hold all that

- “Bildad the shuhite” “sure”

- “i know you” “You don’t know me”

- HE COULDNT KILL THE GOATS

- Ennon’s a little fruity

- “I’m a demon. I lied”

- “He has a permit”

- CROWLEY IS WHY HE LIKES HUMAN FOOD

- THE LET ME TEMPT YOU vs “ARE YOU TRYING TO TEMPT ME”

- shoemaking and obstetrics

- “our car/ our bookshop”

- GOOD OMENS THE BOOK IN GOOD OMENS

- “I’m a demon. I lied” pt 2 😭😭

Episode 3:

- Jim’s mug”

- MURIEL POLICE OUTFIT

- I love her 🫶🏻😭

- HIM BRINGING HIS PLANTS INTO THE BOOKSHOP

- “For like 200 years”

- LAZURI MIRACLE SCALE FOR LAZURUS

- AZIRAPHALE DRIVING

- HIM WRITING ABOUT CROWLEY IN HIS DIARY

- David getting to be really Scottish but like pretending to be bad at it

- Crowley can feel his Bentley

- ITS YELLOW

- them fighting over the car/ Book selling threat

- gravity

- he gets drunk on poison skshsksj

- HE TURNED SMALL

- KAIJU CROWLEY

- “stunning view”

- crowley tossing books

- “we probably don’t have what you’re looking for and we wouldn’t sell it to you if we did”

- AND GRINDR

- “you have no idea”

- ARMAGEDDON 2???

- Shax must be invited in

- SHAX HAS HIS OLD APARTMENT

Episode 4

- FLASHBACK TO THE WW2 SCENE

- OMG LADIES OF CAMELOT FROM THE OPENING CREDITS

- THEY’RE BACK 😂 AND IN HELL

- “I’m fu -*piano*”

- MAGICIAN AZIRAPHALE AGAIN

- ZOMBIES

- SPIDER PUNISHMENT 😳

- that’s what…friends…do

- “Wow me with your miracles”

- the way crowley supports his little magic act

- AZIRAPHALE OWNS A GUN

- “someone you can really trust” *immediately looks to crowley*

- Same legion 😂

- HE SLIGHT OF HANDED HIM

- “you said trust me” “and you did”

- Crowley’s pet

- THE CAR FOLLOWS AZIRA

Episode 5

- Good omens is Anti-HOA

- THE FEZ

- okay shax we see your war fit

- the french

- HE DIDNT TELL HIM ABOUT SHUT YOUR STUPID MOUTH AND DIE ALREADY

- Muriel is so pure i love her istg

- you’re weird

- JIM’S SUIT

- THE DEMON LEGION IN MASKS

- a seamstress

- the dancing

- ELEVATOR TO HEAVEN AND HELL

- THE ANGLE

- ALSO NOT THE BOOKSHOP

- THE COAT

- him lining them up with the buddy system

- nina and maggie staying

- RESCUING ME MAKES HIM SO HAPPY

- Arrest me

- ah shit here we go

Episode 6

- Badass Azira has entered the chat

- Crowley’s fit change and little run

- MAGGIE NO

- Shax really said “leave and i’ll smite you”

- A THRONE OR A DOMINION OR ABOVE

- They never change their passwords

- HE WAS IN THE HIGHEST RANKS?!

- gabriel was on trial

- THE CANDLES! THE EXTINGUISHERS! HE HAS TRAUMA FROM THE FIRE

- EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANGEL

- HE WAS REMOVED FROM OFFICE

- FOR ONE PRINCE OF HEAVEN TO BE CAST OUT…THATS DEFINITELY HIM SAYING CROWLEY WAS AN ARCHANGEL HOLY FUCK

- That’s why he showed up naked..holy shit

- OMG HIS HALO

- “I MAY HAVE JUST STARTED A WAR”

- the awkward elevator

- HIS MEMORIES

- MICHEAL AND BEELZEBUB CHATTING

- THEY LIKE EVERYDAY SO HE MADE SURE THE RECORD IS ALWAYS EVERYDAY 😩

- THEY GAVE HIM A FLY

- NEIL DELIVERED THE SHIP

- “No one’s ever given me anything before” 😭😭

- “You. Thank you”

- “I FOUND SOMETHING THAT MEANT MORE TO ME THAN CHOOSING SIDES”

- THEY SANG TOGETHER SKSJSK

- METATRON THE VOICE OF GOD

- Crowley putting the bookshop back together

- Nina saying she’d hope Maggie will be there when she’s ready

- “YOURE NOT HELPING, ANGEL” Nina pls the parallel

- “Nothing lasts forever” 😭😭😭😭

- him crying as he puts on his glasses

- “NO NIGHTINGALES “

- “WE COULD’VE BEEN US”

- THE KISS

- “I forgive you” “don’t bother”

- Muriel getting the bookshop

- THE SECOND COMING

- NOT “A NIGHTINGALE IN BERKLEY SQUARE”

- they’re both so clearly unhappy and heartbroken

[finn-m-corvex]

Jaya Week 2023 Day 3: Surprise

I told myself I wasn't going to do this. "Finn, you have to do something different," I told myself in the mirror yesterday, but before I could stop myself I had already written 500 words of this and it was too late to start it again so, I did it (and I'm damn proud of it). I did the thing that everyone was probably expecting for this prompt and I can't even say I regret it, because this was a ton of fun to write and I love how it turned out.

Words: 2.3k

TWs: vomiting mention, nothing graphic whatsoever but I thought I would put it here

[REUPLOAD!]

“This is pointless!” Nya yelled, throwing down the magazine with enough force to bend the spine. “None of these have what I need!”

She stomped over the pile of already discarded magazines, crumpling their colorful covers with the soles of her sandals. Running her hands through her hair, Nya kept pacing, ignoring the stack of books that lay innocently on the floor in the corner of the room. Running out to get them without any of the others finding out had been a hassle, and she wasn’t entirely successful with keeping it a secret: Pixal had always been the best at figuring out what they were hiding.

Maybe she had already suspected it, as Nya was absolutely positive that she herself had never bought tests to stock their shared products cabinet in the bathroom. Of course, the night before she had gone looking for a test Nya had found herself hunched over the toilet well after midnight, unable to stop throwing up everything that Zane had made for dinner. Her only coherent thought was about how she was partly glad that Jay had decided to stay with his parents for the next couple days, but that she was also miserable without him there to whisper soothing words in her ear and hold back her hair.

A hand did pull her hair back, and Nya groaned when cool metal pressed against the back of her neck to feel for a fever. “Nya, what are you doing here at this hour?” Pixal had asked, crouching down next to the water ninja with a frown on her face.

“Been in here for a while,” Nya murmured, letting her cheek rest on the toilet seat, “and I can’t stop throwing up. Must’ve had something bad.”

“If you had food poisoning, then I guarantee that this bathroom would be much more crowded right now,” Pixal said, sitting down fully. “Are you sure that could be the only reason?”

“What do you mean?”

Pixal grimaced, like she had been hoping that Nya wouldn’t ask her that. “You and Jay are…active, yes?”

Nya raised an eyebrow. “...if you’re implying what I think you’re implying, then yes.”

“Have you considered the possibility of being pregnant?”

Nya.exe stopped working.

Her friend (sister, let’s be honest) had comforted her for the rest of the night as she tried to put the pieces together, eventually breaking down in loud sobs that had Pixal wrapping her arms around Nya’s shoulders. Nya tried to explain that she wasn’t crying because of the fact that she might be pregnant (oh, First Master she was pregnant), but Pixal shushed her. She didn’t have to explain anything, the samurai had said as she smoothed her hand between Nya’s shoulderblades.

It wasn’t long before the other boys found out. Cole and Zane were the first of them, both having walked in on Nya looking at web pages with cute pregnancy reveal ideas. She hated all of them.

Cole looked concerned when he stepped into the room to find Nya sitting upside down on their couch, her phone thrown over the edge and lying face down on the floor. “Everything okay, Nya?”

She groaned, which made Cole look over to his nindroid brother. Zane could only shrug, “Has Jay done something to upset you?”

“You could say that,” and maybe just a little of her inner turmoil leaked into her voice, because soon her two brothers were sitting on either side of her, Cole leaning against the back while Zane sat up straight. They waited until she had resituated herself to be sitting correctly, and both of their faces darkened when they saw how upset she looked.

“Whatever stupid thing he’s done now,” Cole said seriously, “it doesn’t mean anything. We’ll give him a talk for you, Nya.”

Zane was nodding in solidarity, and Nya knew that she should probably say something to make sure her Yin kept all of his fingers. “It’s not entirely Jay’s fault.”

“Then what happened?” Zane asked gently, taking her hand in his robotic one. “I have not seen you like this for quite some time, Nya. Cole and I only want to help you.”

No time like the present, she thought to herself, biting her lip before biting the bullet. “If I tell you guys something, you have to keep it a secret, alright?”

“Absolutely.” the earth ninja reaffirmed, Zane echoing his sentiment.

“I’m pregnant.”

Both of them had stared at her. Cole’s lips were moving up and down like a fish, while Zane’s eyes were wide with surprise. Nya shrunk into herself, suddenly very self-conscious of what exactly she had just told her brothers, and the movement brought them back to their senses when they cuddled closer on both sides.

Cole was the first one to get over his shock. “You’re serious?”

“Yes,” Nya sighed, “I’m serious. I was throwing up all last night and Pixal got me a few tests to confirm it. They were positive.”

“I’m gonna be an uncle?!”

That was not the reaction that Nya had been anticipating. “Yes?”

“Holy crap!” Cole’s face lit up with an elated grin. “Zane! We’re gonna be uncles!”

Nya watched in amazement as her two biggest brothers danced around their living room, Cole whooping at the top of his lungs while Zane congratulated her with gusto. She knew that they never would’ve expressed their true feelings if any of them had been negative, but she wasn’t quite expecting the level of joy that was filling the room to the brim. Although Nya should’ve known better than to think that the other ninja would be anything less than supportive of her and Jay.

She made them promise to keep it a secret until Jay had gotten back, and they both had solemnly sworn with their hands over their hearts (in Zane’s case, his power source) to not breathe a word until Jay knew.

Which had led Nya to right now, tossing yet another baby magazine to the side in frustration as she sat down on her bed with a huff. For all of the hubbub that the small things generated at the grocery store, why were all of them so useless?!

Knocking on her door frame, Lloyd peeked his head in, quickly followed by Kai. “Nya?”

Diving for the pile of things on the floor, Nya did her best to cover them up. “This isn’t what it looks like!”

“What is it…supposed to look like?” Lloyd asked, and Nya watched in horror as Kai picked up a magazine that she had hurled at the door in a fit of rage over awful baby name suggestions.

Kai held it up to read the cover, eyes narrowing. “Ninjago’s Top Baby Names…wait. Is Benthomaar pregnant?!”

WHAT?!

“No, you idiot!” Nya yelled, forgetting about the magazines she was hiding and storming up to her brother and snatching the magazine from his hands, rolling it up into a tube and whacking him over the head. “Benthomaar can’t even get pregnant!”

“But there’s some ocean animals where the guy gets pregnant, right?! Isn’t he one of those?!”

“Those are seahorses, Kai!” she seethed, threatening to whack him again, “Does he look like a seahorse to you?”

Wow, the books weren’t kidding when they said the pregnancy hormones were intense.

Her older brother was saved by Lloyd gently wrapping his arms around her middle, and Nya relaxed when she felt his head plop down onto her shoulder. “There’s no need to be violent, Nya. We just wanted to come check on you because you’ve been acting a little weird for the past few days, and Cole and Zane won’t tell us anything. Is something wrong?”

She bit her lip. This wasn’t exactly how she wanted to tell them, but it would have to suffice. “I-I’m pregnant, not Benthomaar.”

A beat. Two beats. Suddenly she was being twirled in a circle by Lloyd, who was also bouncing up and down and shouting with glee. When he finally put her down, he gave her one of the brightest smiles she had ever seen. “Nya! That’s amazing! You and Jay are gonna be parents!”

For some reason, Lloyd’s reaction wasn’t the one that Nya was the most concerned about. She turned around to look at Kai, who had a rare soft smile on his face. His eyes were blinking with unshed tears, and Nya could only hope that they were from happiness rather than the disappointment that she had been worrying about.

Kai saw her hesitation and held out his arms. “C’mere sis.”

Nya didn’t hesitate to wrap her arms around her brother’s shoulders and squeeze, feeling his arms coil themselves around her waist in an embrace that brought back all of her childhood memories. Kai’s chuckle only made her squeeze tighter. “I’m so proud of you, Nya. It’s going to be great for you and Jay, just wait and see.”

“Yeah,” she said wetly, willing herself to not cry, “we’re gonna have a great time.”

“What’s going to be a great time?”

The water ninja was not prepared for the speed at which Kai let her go, wheeling around and tackling her Yin five feet down the hall with a surprised shout. Nya startled when Lloyd slammed the door to her and Jay’s shared bedroom shut, and the blond turned to face her with wide eyes.

“Kai can keep him busy,” Lloyd said quickly, “but I don’t know for how long. I’ll help you put these away so he doesn’t see!”

Except for some reason, Nya wasn’t sure if she wanted to hide them. She paused, and Lloyd stared at her in bewilderment, and both of them jumped when they heard Kai hollering down the hall for reinforcements. It only took a second before she heard Jay breaking out into a fit of panicked giggles and yelling for Kai to stop tickling him.

She was a good Yang, and Jay was one of the most sensitive people she had ever met when it came to tickles, so she couldn’t really leave him out there to fend for himsefl, right?

Lloyd didn’t try to stop her from opening the door and stepping out of the room, only following with a curious look on his face. Nya was not at all surprised to see the scene before her: Jay was floundering around, laughing, desperately pushing at Kai’s chest while the fire ninja went to town on his brother’s ribs. Cole came rocketing from around the corner with a devious grin on his face, with Pixal and Zane trailing behind, both looking equally befuddled.

“Look who's finally home!” Cole said, and Kai only paused in his onslaught to let the earth ninja haul Jay up by the armpits. Nya knew that if she was going to interfere, it had to be before Cole curled his hand into her Yin’s underarms to make Jay start screaming bloody murder.

“Boys,” she chastised, and everyone turned to look at her. Jay’s face went from nervous anticipation to joyful glee in a matter of seconds. “Leave him alone.”

Cole and Kai looked somewhat disappointed, with the former letting Jay down to stand on his own two feet. Jay rushed forward, exclaiming her name and hugging her tightly to his chest. Butterflies swarmed in her stomach when she felt him kiss her neck, and Nya pulled back a little to cup his face in her hands.

Jay pecked her on the lips, and Nya was all too happy to reciprocate despite Kai and Lloyd fake-gagging in the background. “Hi, sweetheart. How were your parents?”

“Good,” Jay said sweetly, rubbing his thumb along the small of her back. “They’re all good, except Ma was asking a lot of questions about grandkids, for some reason. I think she and Pa have been going to the park and hanging out around the playground way too much.”

Nya could’ve drowned Cole when he coughed in the background, followed up by Kai muttering something about how Jay interrupted them. Jay turned to the brunette with a questioning frown. “What did I interrupt?”

She glared at Kai, who only shrunk back behind Zane with a sheepish look. Jay looked back at her, noticing the underlying nervousness in her expression. He squeezed her hand, and Nya glanced up to see the worry in his eyes.

“Hey,” he started, and Nya was surprised at how softly he was speaking, “is everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Nya said in a tone that she hoped was confident, but it didn’t sound very convincing; Jay’s look of worry only grew. “Everything’s fine, Jay. It’s just…”

“What?”

Taking a deep breath, Nya steeled her nerves, looking her Yin in the eyes. “Jay, I’m pregnant.”

“You’re-you’re what?” Jay stammered, his face blushing ever so lightly in a way that made Nya want to kiss him senseless. “You’re pregnant?”

“I am.”

“I’m gonna be a dad?”

“Surprise! You’re gonna be a dad, Jay,” and nothing could’ve prepared Nya for the tears that started rolling down his face, and she was quick to start wiping them away with her thumbs.

He leaned forward and kissed her softly, his hands travelling up and tangling in her hair. She smiled into the kiss, some of his tears touching her lips and turning their sweet kiss salty. When Nya finally pulled back, there wasn’t an ounce of sadness to be found, and instead laughter bubbled out of Jay’s mouth.

“I-I’m gonna be a dad,” and he turned to look at all of his brothers and sister, who all had matching looks of happiness on their faces, “I’m going to be a dad!”

Cole was the first one to rush forward, quickly followed by Kai as they glumped the blue ninja into a big hug, making room for Lloyd to pop in under Kai’s arm and Zane wrapping his arms around them from behind. Jay’s smile only grew with every bit of praise that they showered him with, although Nya was sure she saw some pokes into his belly every few moments.

She startled when Pixal hugged her from behind, laying her head on Nya’s shoulder. “I think this was the best surprise you could’ve ever given him, Nya.”

And Nya started laughing, because it was the best surprise that she could’ve asked for herself, too.

[mokonahapuuuuuu]

Abridged

Note: So basically, I was thinking of writing COTT the abridged series, but why not try and get my feet wet and abridge one of my own fics. Not to sound like I'm bragging, but I'm proud of myself with 'Box of Beauty' since I got through my ADHD and the story came across like an episode of the show.

Anyways, here it is...! If I do try to abridge episode one of the show, yay for me.

---

“This is the millionth time we’re fighting Cronus…!” shouted Jay.

“It’s to keep the episodes going,” said Odie on the PMR. “How else are the cast and crew going to get employed and put food on the table?” 

The teenagers clamoured around Cronus as he beat them all off one by one. “Beating up teenagers is so much fun…!” 

He looked around. The God of Time beat all the teenagers. 

“I am Xena Warrior Princess! Hear my war cry!” Belle raged on on Pegasus. 

“You know, you’re just an OC in part of a fan fiction,” the Time God mocked. “You’re not really apart of the whole show.” 

“Take. That. Back.” Belle’s eyes were raging. 

Cronus got out the poison and slammed it against his sword. “Never!”

Belle’s face was scared badly. 

“Burn…! Literally.” 

—— 

It was pure bedlam. 

Everyone was screaming at the top of their lungs. 

“Belle has been poisoned and scared!” exclaimed Theresa. 

“She can’t bear the responsibility of being the next Zuko!” shouted Herry. 

“I’m not ready for a life changing trip with Belle…!” breathed Atlanta. 

“Where is the honour?” 

“Belle needs the Box of Beauty to be cured of her scar, and the Box is in the Underworld,” began Hera. “But since we use you teenagers as child labour and basically send you out to your deaths, we thank you for not suing us. Especially for complete disregard for your safety. Thank Zeus your parents don’t know what happens at this school.” 

“Um, since I’m the only sane one here, I’ll go get the Box of Beauty for Belle myself,” said Neil. 

“Just go already, we don’t care about you!” exclaimed the rest of the team. 

—— 

“Ooh, the Underworld…” Neil looked around him. “I’m sure I can take on anything that comes my way, ahh!” 

A bunch of skeletons came after him. “Halloween isn’t until eight months…!” 

There was the mausoleum in front of him with the silver box. 

“This must be the Box of Beauty,” began Neil. “I must take it so I can use it to save my love…” 

He felt himself grew older, and he saw himself become an old man. “What, no I don’t want to be an old man! I don’t wanna drink prune juice!” 

The Underworld echoed as he said ‘juice’. 

As Neil walked up to the surface, he saw all his friends greet him. 

“This old man, he played one, he played knick-knack on my thumb…” 

“Archie, okay, I get it, I’m an old man! Shut up!” 

Belle’s face was restored thanks to Neil and the Box of Beauty, and he accomplished his mission. 

“Neil, since you are literally nothing without your good looks, and the show can’t continue on with you as an old man, Aphrodite and I decide to reward you since you saved Belle,” said Poseidon. 

“Reward me with what?” 

Their hands touched Neil. “God powers, activate!” 

Neil was back to his good looking younger self. 

“Aw, man, I really wanted to give him prune juice…!” said Archie. 

Belle and Neil were at the roof patio. 

“You know, I’m beginning to realize a lot of young adult fiction is basically teenagers getting into a lot of dangerous fights,” began Belle. “I mean, look at Harry Potter. If half the things like what happened in the books happened at an ordinary high school, the school would be closed down.”

“That’s the point of it,” began Neil. “It’s just fiction. Plain fantasy. That way, no one gets hurt.”

“So you’re saying that we’re just fictional made up people in a fictional made up world?” she asked. 

Neil nodded. “Basically.” 

Belle looked out into the horizon. “I’m having an existential crisis right now.” 

“Don’t worry,” he kissed her cheek. “I still love you.” 

[voidthewanderer]

INQUIRING MINDS WISH TO KNOW——>

For the OC Ask Game! ✨Creating your OCs✨

1, 3, 8, 12, 16 and 19 for Ripper, Shae and Arsenic!!!

:)

Please :))

Pretty please :)))

(Don’t make me whip out my quadruple chin!!!)

@anonwyvern || Questions About Creating Your OCs

Under cut for length; I needed to talk about my babiesss.

What was the first element of your OC that you remember considering (name, appearance, backstory, etc.)? 

Shae: Shae was appearance, though and through. She'd gone through so many changes; species changes as she traveled through fandoms and back and forth between getting pulled from them to be from original concepts. Being online during the massive point online where "Mary Sue bad and you're a terrible person for making them!", she kind of just went onto this backburner with everything; looks, appearance, story, everything.

Ripper: Mostly appearance, but a super loose as hell backstory as well. Rips was originally a Left 4 Dead OC and of a concept that never actually made it to the game at that. Most of what did exist of his backstory was just that he was an asylum escapee who was turned. Rather than the straight jacket being closed up, his arms were free. He's had the most changes over his entire timespan.

Arsenic: Appearance 100%. He actually was originally a concept made by my nephew! He wanted a zombie chef, so I made a zombie chef!

3. How did you choose their name? 

Shae: I honestly don't even remember where her name came from. It wasn't exactly a popular name when I made her, damn probably about seventeen years ago now? Maybe longer, I think.

Ripper: Was originally a sort of punny name. "A scream ripping at one's throat". Where Joseph Trumoil came from, is one of those things that just... happened. Sometimes names just get stuck in my head. I'll quote him directly from the WIP of Chapter 26 of Mnemonic Impressions for why it's still Ripper: "Thanks to my old line of work, if it were humanly possible at that time, I could rip someone apart and know exactly how to do it to cause the most damage; didn’t help I used t’ do some body building. My friends were… fucked up t’ say the least."

Arsenic: I kinda thought it would be funny for an undead, zombie chef to have his name be the same as a poison.

8. What (if anything) do you relate to within their character/story? 

Shae: Let's just say that I am actually very mouthy like Shae it. And, just like with her current situation with Sinjin, I need to learn how to keep my mouth shut so I don't get hurt.

Ripper: There's actually not much story wise I relate to with Rips. If anything, I'm envious of my own character. He's charismatic, charming, his style is impeccable. I guess he did get a lot of my "do no harm, but take no shit" personality.

Arsenic: The cooking! Arsenic is literally probably the person I would become (sans the murders) if I actually stayed in the food service industry.

12. What have you found to be most difficult about creating art for your OC (any form of art: writing, drawing, edits, etc.)? 

Shae: It's actually been difficult to keep her silver tongued, combative, defiant, but also keeping her... alive. In all honesty, she would probably be dead by now if I didn't mellow her out a bit. She's legit supposed to be as vile as Sinjin is, cutting some completely reprehensible stuff, but I also know that she would have been long since dead before her story even started.

Ripper: No lie, actually nailing down his official design. Every time I think I have something solid, I go "oh, this would work with him!" and then things would change. Rinse and repeat. Now it's more just trying to nail down exactly who I wanna build his facial structure off of, because William Treat is EXACTLY how he smiles, but I also adore him having sharp features like Dum Dum from Cyberpunk 2077 has. Trying to blend the two together is... fun.

Arsenic: HIS FACE. HIS FUCKING FACE. I DID IT TO MYSELF BUT GOD WHY

16. What is something about your OC can make you cry? 

Shae: Her story. Like, god her story is fucked up and just the fact that so much about her kids was kept from her and knowing everything she's gone through, that she's the way she is through so much tragedy and just out of a necessity to survive.

Ripper: Also his backstory, but also like... this man is such a sweetheart and sensitive. Be it because he's just being so goddamn cute or because he's going through an existential crisis, he's probably gonna say something that would either turn me into a mushy mess or bawling my eyes out because why did I hurt you this much.

Arsenic: There's two things with him. When he lets his walls down and lets people in, showing that he's not just a hardened ghoul who hates everything around him. Also, if anything were to happen to Crow, this man's heart would absolutely shatter and he'd probably lose his goddamn mind. That sort of mental torment of feeling like he's lost his soul mate, knowing how he'd react to it, especially now with them in his life again.

19. What is your favorite fact about your OC?

Shae: Not so much of a fact of the character itself (because imho anything I really say with her will give away parts of Addicted), but the fact that she's the second OC I've ever created! She's my second oldest OC, being seventeen (plus) years old.

Ripper: He's only second generation American born in his family! His parents are the first born, his grandmother is from Palermo, his grandfather from Verona.

Arsenic: No matter what, Arsenic was meant to cook and I don't mean that just by his concept alone. He's someone who would be considered to have a natural born talent for what he does and I genuinely cannot think of anything else I would have ever even considered putting him in. If it wasn't a chef, it would've been a cafe owner.

[c-o-r-r-u-p-t]

Dear younger self,

Every time I write something like this, I imagine the version of myself on the day I gave myself caffeine poisoning. I had stayed home all day looking at rent prices and trying to figure out what I might be able to afford when I’m all grown up, dreaming of one day having my own nyc apartment

I loved to plan. I loved to dream of the future and think of the trips I wanted to take and the things I wanted to experience. It’s why it’s so ironic that I was so insanely suicidal back then. I had also given myself food poisoning because I drank about 7 cups of coffee that day trying to convince myself I like it so I could live off of it, because it had no calories and that’s what all the other girls with eating disorders did. It still feels weird to put myself in that category tho but I definitely had problems with eating for a long time.

Anyway, that’s who I’m writing to. I’m writing to the kid that lost most their friends because they couldn’t bare to leave their bed and spent all their free time at school crying in the library or desperately looking for an escape through books. The kid that let themselves have a whole 700 calories that day, in total, as a birthday present to themselves. To the kid that dissociated for hours a day in the bathtub to daughter while the cuts on their hips slowly bled into the water, making them lose so much blood that they collapsed and had to crawl naked to their room before anyone found them. To the kid that wanted so badly to be happy but just couldn’t, but could still dream

Dear younger me,

We fucking did it. We did it all. Everything that you planned, everything you held on to when there was nothing around, everything you wanted to be. When all you could do to stay alive was dream about the possibilities of your future being brighter. We fucking did it. We moved to nyc. We even have a park out the window. We hiked the fucking Appalachian trail. The whole fucking thing, just like you said. Started and finished by yourself, too. Taken a few other solo trips too, like to Yellowstone last year. We even spent a semester abroad, and got to find out what falling in love in Greece is like. We not only got the psych degree that you’ve wanted since 9th grade, but one of the professors saw your potential and gave you a shot to prove it as a volunteer at the Bronx zoo. You worked so hard that you’re a zookeeper now. Can you actually believe it? A fucking zookeeper!!! Thats actually your adult career..... We didn’t even think that was a real possibility back then!!! And we fucking got it. And it’s hard but it’s so good and so rewarding. Telling people what you do for a living and watching them react to zookeeper never gets old. We thrive off of people telling us how cool of a job we have. And guess what I brought home today… a fucking LION WHISKER. This is the closest to our life goal we’ve ever been, and we’re really getting there. We have made such a beautiful live for ourself. We some how found a way to be surrounded by nature in the middle of the city. And the friends you make… they’re such a gift. Some of the kindest, most wholesome and caring yet fucking sick people out there, and they love us. We became the type of person that earned love and respect from some truly beautiful people. People who continuously go out of their way to show us love when we need it. They are what keep you going when you need something to lean on. Them and yourself.

I wanted to write this to show myself how far we’ve come from that little kid dreaming of having a life they actually want to live through

We grew up, but all our decisions are for you. For the kid that some how managed to hold on through that fucking hell. You held on for me, so I’m making this life everything you’ve ever dreamed of. Everything I can remember, I’m making happen. I bought my own car for the first time last week, and as soon as I got in it I put on mr rager by kid cudi, like I’ve been planning since 10th grade. I am making my dreams come true. I built a beautiful goddamn life and I’m so proud of how far I’ve come. And I deserve all of it.

[blooming-skeleton]

Not with my dad, my moms is pretty shaky

No one (romantically) @caretaleandotherstuff (platonically)

Keeping up a friendship with abusive people

A bit, about my stupidity

Single

Peacefully in my sleep

a few minutes ago, actually

soccer at one point

no

A few years ago, (no longer) friend’s brother touched me inappropriately

yes, (fictional unfortunately)

Also yes

Myself, but I’m getting better I swear

My great grandmother, may she rest in peace 🙏

8 chickens, 6 hermit crabs, 1 hedgehog, 5 fish

Tired (my dad is rambling about politics and I can’t escape)

No, I haven’t even been able to find anyone who likes me that much.

Not really

No, I don’t wanna go back

I have no idea that means, if it means sex I have never done that either

not really

no, but if I adopted, preferably one

None

Art (writing and drawing)

No, I don’t really know anyone from the past, I haven’t been allowed to socialize for most of my life

Cuddles with someone way bigger than me so I get smothered in coziness

Never had a relationship, so no

same as 27

same as 28

My back hurts

platonically, like 1-2 people. Romantically? Only in my mind

Black, brown, purple, and green

yeah, I’m getting better though!

Infurnius from Rainimator was cuddling me and he was so warm and gentle and aahahhhhhhhhhh like warm laundry

My mom, cause she made me cry

Yes, but I do hold grudges

I don’t know

Yeah, I think

I never have been kissed

No?

Asian takeout food

sometimes

Drew some stuff

No, I don’t think so

not particularly

none

Yes

foggy and cool

no it blinds me why would I like it

yes, but only if we truly love each other

no one has ever called me that

soft things, talking to people, pets, cuddles, drawing

No, I like mine

I HAVE NO ROMANTIC EXPERIENCE I HAVE NEVER KISSED

I’m bi, and I do like my friends a lot. So not really that much of a problem

no, but two of the same sex!

my dad. To try to figure out how he got covered in poison ivy

@caretaleandotherstuff, I guess

to an extent

yes, absolutely

70 horrible questions ... Fuck it

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? 02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? 03: Do you regret anything? 04: Are you insecure? 05: What is your relationship status? 06: How do you want to die? 07: What did you last eat? 08: Played any sports? 09: Do you bite your nails? 10: When was your last physical fight? 11: Do you like someone? 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? 13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? 14: Do you miss someone? 15: Have any pets? 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? 18: Are you scared of spiders? 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? 20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? 21: What are your plans for this weekend? 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? 23: Do you have piercings? How many? 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? 26: What are you craving right now? 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? 28: Have you ever been cheated on? 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? 30: What’s irritating you right now? 31: Does somebody love you? 32: What is your favourite color? 33: Do you have trust issues? 34: Who/what was your last dream about? 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? 36: Do you give out second chances too easily? 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? 38: Is this year the best year of your life? 39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? 51: Favourite food? 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? 54: Is cheating ever okay? 55: Are you mean? 56: How many people have you fist fought? 57: Do you believe in true love? 58: Favourite weather? 59: Do you like the snow? 60: Do you wanna get married? 61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? 62: What makes you happy? 63: Would you change your name? 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? 65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? 69: Do you believe in soulmates? 70: Is there anyone you would die for?

[letterstooldpeople]

to Christopher--2024/07/17

Hi Christopher,

There is so much I want you to know, but I don't want to talk to you because I'm a coward.

Just writing this puts pressure in my eyes, even though you'll probably never see it, unless I die in a freak accident that is posted all over the local news and some tumblr troopers do internet sleuthing and find this. But here is all the news I have for you.

To be honest, I thought I was getting over you, because even though you did pop up in my thoughts now and then, I wasn't really inclined to write them out in these letters and work on processing my feelings, i.e., the feelings I have for you are not as strong any more.

I remember last time you told me about how you were sad that you and Irish don't talk anymore. And I thought about reaching out. But then, I remembered that time where we sat in your dark car after getting Cuban sandwiches in SODO and you told me how Aimee had reached out to you, but that you had just ignored her. I imagined that if I had reached out, you'd be with Kitana, sitting in your new tan car, telling her how I had reached out but that you weren't interested in responding back to me.

Sometimes, when I go to Bellevue with my friends, I'm worried that I might bump into you. I don't know what I'd do.

When Suraj and I accidentally bumped into each other at SBP shortly after we ended things, true to my cowardly nature, I pretended not to see him, so he did the same.

I know that if you saw me, you'd say "hi" and wouldn't let me off the hook in pretending not to know you. The possibility of this situation gives me anxiety. I do want to be acknowledged by you. But, I feel like if you did, I would spontaneously start crying and embarrass myself.

I saw on LinkedIn that you got a new role at your company. I guess you passed that first CFA test. Congratulations, Christopher! I know you tried really hard on studying for that exam. You're one step closer to your dream job of managing larger portfolios at Blackrock. I'm so, so proud of you.

I did see that you updated your Instagram profile picture to one of you and her. The way it happened was that I had accidentally given myself food poisoning on July 2nd. I ate a couple TUMS you had bought me a while ago. To distract myself from vomiting and stomach pain, I downloaded Instagram to see if any of my friends had been up to anything new. When I saw you with Kitana, I felt really pathetic: here I was, alone, vomiting the mid broccoli beef I had made yesterday, and there you were, both of you looking really good. I guess you've really moved on. So in addition to vomiting, I started crying--isn't that hilarious?

The next day, I talked to my friend about it and felt better afterward, but then I woke up to your text the next day saying "I hope you've been doing well."

I genuinely wondered if you were just drunk/lonely/horny because Kitana had gone back home for the holiday. In my defense, you did text me at 2AM on a nonwork night.

One thing I learned from you is that someone would actually want to hang out with me just because I am me. I don't think I've experienced that before.

In our last Facetime together, I refused to say good bye. But, I think now is the time. In one of my birthday cards to you, I lamented how it seemed like we never had enough time to enjoy each other's company. To think that that limited time is now over! I guess it's time to delete all my pictures of you and unfollow you on Instagram and delete your contact on my phone.

At this point, sometimes I wish that we hadn't happened, because at this point you've become a stranger to me, and the cognitive dissonance of knowing you so well and not knowing you at all is killing me. But I think I'm getting over it, slowly but surely.

Maybe, even if we end up in the same room in the future, you won't be able to recognize me because I will have changed a lot too. Maybe we will just pass each other without noticing each other's presence. We will have reverted back to strangers once more with only our memories of our 26-year-old selves to cherish.

Even if I don't text you back, I hope you understand that I do care about you, Christopher. I hope you forgive my cowardice. And I wish you all the best in your future endeavors.

You are a goose. But, I love you still.

With lots of love, goodbye, Christopher.

[angelbluediary]

[Side note, I’ve seen 12:22 and 2:22 today.]

Something my mom has made a point about repeatedly, when we get into it, is that she doesn’t verbally abuse me the way her mother did to her. She says she has always been a good mom and in many ways seems to credit that with not calling me fat growing up.

What she doesn’t seem to realize is that I’ve grown up listening to her tear her own appearance apart, and that affects me, too. Obviously not to the same degree. But it makes me understand, all the same, that I have to present myself a certain way every time I leave the house and every time I pose for photos. She has taught me that women (even—especially!—your best friends) will zoom in on your face, on all of your faces, and critique and compare and criticize. That every picture posted of you online is grounds for scrutiny. That you have to obsess and despair over every perceived flaw. (And that may be why I always have to edit my photos before I post them, down to the tiniest details).

Yesterday we went to a wedding—a small and casual wedding with close family friends—and while I’m rushing to get ready, she asks me for help. Wants advice on her shape wear that’s bunching up her skin and “feels like torture” and explains why the other set won’t be as good, because it’s old, but then she wants me to help pull it up and pin it to her bra on both sides so it stays in place, and I’m like ahhhhh??? And I’m visibly uncomfortable with that and tell her I won’t be able to do it and she looks at me with such a disappointed expression, with that touch of “how dare you,” that vague trace of “who do you think you are” that I see on her face towards me sometimes (and is always later confirmed by her words in private) so I do. I try. I do my best and try not to think about how badly I just want to fix my hair before our time runs out and I follow her instructions and I poke her by accident with the pin, and she yelps, so I immediately stop and reiterate that see I couldn’t do it after all.

Obviously when my dad got home, he helped her as he always does.

So the wedding service goes great, we’re all laughing and having a good time, I’m feeling really happy because the only other wedding I’ve been to as an adult was poisoned the entire evening with tension between my mom and I (that stupid misunderstanding; the both of us being hungry; me excitedly telling her about there being more food when I glimpsed the kitchen preparing a massive spread in the back; her thinking I meant it was already available and having to wait just a bit longer; her telling everyone for the rest of the night about the cruel joke I played on her, as I lightly laughed along and tried to gently diffuse while setting the record straight; her all but calling me a conniving liar and repeating her “joke” again and again till I finally blew up hours later).

And I’m determined to keep it lighthearted and easy like this, but my mom can’t stand that, apparently. Has to make me the butt of the joke whenever she can. So she tells my cousin about me sticking her with the safety pin, like it was intentional. Like I’d been waiting for an opportunity to hurt her.

By this point it’s 3 pm and I’m on my heaviest flow day, haven’t eaten, and am instantly triggered. And I just shut down. All at once I feel like I’m going to cry, in front of all these people, because she keeps up the joke when she sees I’m not playing along. She loves to poke fun of other people and she never learns to fucking lay off but you can’t say a word back to her with the same energy.

To make matters worse, apparently she had recruited M to help with her shape wear after I’d left. He hadn’t been able to do it, but he hadn’t stuck her with the pin, which she made sure to tell my cousin and the rest of our little table.

Why am I writing about all this?

Because today is Mother’s Day, and I’ve been unemployed for almost two months now, am just now starting to pick up interviews, so I wasn’t able to get her anything elaborate like a custom necklace with all our birthday gemstones, or whatever else I’ve given her in the past, and instead got a candle. A cute funny candle with a scent I thought she’d like that cost almost $30 total with shipping. And I go out there today and sitting on the dining room table is an elaborate basket M bought her, filled with all kinds of nice pampering items. And it felt like the biggest fucking betrayal, and a slap in the face on multiple fronts. Because of course this is going to add to her comparisons between us (even though my big gifts didn’t seem to help my ranking, but whatever). But also How could he? How could M do this? And what a ridiculous thought that is, because what has he done besides buy a nice gift for our mom on Mother’s Day? Yet he’s always going on about now wanting to be the golden boy, not wanting to live up to all these expectations they have of him (and I want to ask, what expectations? You don’t drive, have no chores, don’t get the grades I used to get and aren’t expected to, they shrug or laugh when you admit you’ve smoked weed or done anything, what are you even talking about?), trauma of being a Gifted Student (again???)

His gift, dwarfing mine so ridiculously, is a visual representation of how our mom sees our efforts towards her and towards our family at large. It doesn’t matter how many miles and hours I drive for them, how many days I sacrifice to help other peoples’ schedules, the times I’d keep M with me in Myrtle Beach, putting myself through college entirely on my own loans, that I grew up with household duties and they haven’t, that I set the precedent for buying her nice things with the money I earned, none of that matters.

Living with her is too difficult for my heart.

[itsthehcgforme]

resentment energy, the power of anger, reworks and solid food.

good morning y’all! and when I say y’all I mean all.  The practice of getting up and writing has always been a healing thing for me. I’m happy to be back at it. Leaving myself encouragement, love letters, reminders, lessons. Whew. The last few days I’ve been sitting in real contemplation of resentment. and forgiveness. If you want a tldr; have it be this: God forgives. I don’t.  Although I know PMS has been a contributor, and the fact that I’ve still been struggling with solid foods, I know that I’ve been DEEP in some anger y’all. But the thing is, I’ve been choosing to reason with my anger. It’s only fair. I’m trying to create a separation between malicious intent and everything outside of it. Deciding which one warrants anger, and which ones warrant empathy, understanding, apathy even. For me, the thing has always been is I’m hurt, I’m hurt. No reason, reasoning, excuse, or lack of intention can negate that. If I shoot you with a gun, it doesn’t matter if it was an accident or not. There’s still a bullet that’s punctured your body. How does this differ with action? Being irresponsible with the hearts, feelings of others?  Growing up, I wasn’t engraved with lessons of the sacrament of forgiveness, although it was taught in school, and I’d seen sitcoms on the topic, it was genuinely a concept I never understood. It’s not to say that I’ve never extended my heart into forgiveness. That I have. With my family, my best friend, lovers, partners. But the thing is, it’s never gotten me anywhere. It’s never whole heartedly bettered a situation. When I forgive, I tell you it’s okay. I acknowledge xyz, but it’s okay. What good does that really do? When we forgive, whether verbatim or not, we tell, and reinforce that bad actions, ill intent, harm will be met with the reward of softness, gentleness, warm embrace. The thing about forgiveness is that it’s fertile soil. It’s a place where anything can grow. On rare occasion, change. Consistently, in my experience, it’s only been a breeding ground for bad behaviour, with promise that ill intent will return again. and again. It’ll get to a point where harm equals reward. Where is the redirection in that? Where is the correction in that? Where is the humanity in that? Over the years of growing up, I’ve noticed reasoning for forgiveness has changed as well. It’s shifted from a “well you never know what another is going through, so forgive them” to the polar opposite of “holding onto resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to get sick. forgive them and help yourself”. So, to me, I think that people don’t really understand why they forgive, anyway. Is it because looking at conflict directly is too uncomfortable and difficult? That we’d rather just skip back to when things weren’t so tense? Or is it because we want to make excuses for people who don’t know, or don’t do better?  For me, sitting in resentment energy, in anger, has been one of the most fortifying forces in my life. It’s kept me grounded in reality. It’s kept me alert. It’s kept me righteous. When I’m angry, it reminds me that something isn’t right. The discomfort of anger forces me to acknowledge that a change needs to be made. Now that I’m older, I see that those changes all start with me. My needs can’t be met? I can forgive you, sure. But I know my heart. I know the soil. Anger is the reminder that my needs weren’t met, and from here, what needs to be done is for me to remove myself from xyz, in order go have my needs met. Sitting in the shit and crying about it doesn’t bring roses. Getting up out of the shit, washing myself off, going elsewhere and planting rose flower seeds will. Anger is and has always been the energy I pull from to find the will to go on. It reinforces my own limits and boundaries. It tells me that I am worthy. It tells me when my surroundings and experiences don’t reflect that reality. Sitting in anger is my power. Sitting in anger is my saviour. Sitting in anger is my armour. Sitting in anger is where I find and re-find my light.  Of course, honing anger comes with responsibility. When anger moves through my body, I hold responsibility so great. There have been times where I’ve lost control of it. Where I’ve let my entitlement to “more” become the thing that makes me harmful. It isn’t a thin line. That’s a reality that I’ve had to sit in. There’s so much power in walking away. There isn’t much power is lashing out. There is infinite power in finding people and experiences that mirror your worth. There isn’t much power in blowing fire at anyone who can’t.  With that being said, I solemnly promise myself that moving forward, I want to be as intentional as I can with my anger. In the name of self preservation, I want to hone fire, not breathe it LOL. I love myself enough to see things as they are, that includes myself. It’s my honour, and my duty, to myself now. I wonder where this new route will take me..

[psychedelic-ink]

*the banner (& mastelist overall) is heavily influenced by my dearest @inklore 's kinktober masterlist and I urge everyone to go and check her deliciously smutty list out 💜

— 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐓𝐎𝐁𝐄𝐑 ‘𝟐𝟐

hi lovelies! my favorite time of the year has finally arrived-- under the cut you'll find all the things I've written for this years kinktober, the list will be updated as we go, enjoy 💜

(🖤) indicates dark content/check trigger warnings

i made a taglist for kinktober which you can join but if that's not your thing you can simply follow my library blog and turn on notifs!

before reading anything please thoroughly read the warnings since some of them include heavier kinky scenarios

i won't be listing the ones i plan on writing as to not limit myself to a list and so I can change characters/kinks as i please and without worry. the fics listed below have already been written and scheduled to post

main masterlist

1 | me & mine: pero tovar x reader x ezra | double penetration

after coming to a new city, you find yourself in your hotel room with two unbelievably attractive men.

2 | marked man: pero tovar x reader | dry humping, squirting

despite the fact that you shouldn't, you can't help but continue to visit the prisoner that you still didn't know the name of. An unexpected visitor shows up.

3| daddy issues: matt murdock x reader | blood kink, boxer au

you're tired of seeing him getting purposefully beat up every night. matt tries to reason with you.

4| poison & wine: duke leto x reader x din djarin | spit roasting

the razor crest is low on fuel and din knows the perfect pit spot.

5| dear friend,: ezra x reader | phone sex, dirty talking

you've been friends with ezra for a while now. after talking on the phone and making plans to meet up tomorrow, ezra thinks he hung up. you can't help but listen in as he gives a woman you don't know the time of her life. 

6| save tonight: frankie morales x reader x santiago garcia | cuckolding, degradation

frankie comes with you with a proposal that you're eager to accept.

7| river: din djarin x reader | dacryphilia

din likes it when you cry for him.

8| choke on flowers: dieter bravo x reader | cult, blackmail 🖤

dieter is a mess, but you enjoy being with him nonetheless. but things start to change when a friend of his comes for a visit.

9| careless: frankie morales x reader x jack daniels | lactation kink, titjob

you get hit with a drug that makes you lactate, frankie and jack are more than eager to help you out.

10| stupid for you: steven grant x reader | orgasm denial, brat taming, mirror sex

steven wants you to admit he's the best you ever had, as always you don't make it easy for him

11| one touch: javier peña x reader | somnophilia

you've been set on trying to convince javier to take what he wants, for him to let go and he finally does.

12| like that: modern!pero tovar x reader | knife play

there's a storm raging outside and you go down to the basement to look at a Pero's knife collection while he's gone.

13| loverboy: tom!peter parker x reader | choking, breathplay

you get trapped in your sweater, peter has a unique way of helping you out.

14| 3 AM: dbf!santiago garcia x reader | dry humping, quiet sex

santi comes to your room for a visit at 3 AM.

15| hit the road: jack daniels x reader | consensual noncon

It's late when you leave the office, you feel a pair of familiar eyes watching you.

16| heat waves: dieter bravo x reader | temperature play, food play

dieter wants to try something new.

17| is forever for you?: jake lockley x reader | corruption kink, sex toys

jake is always eager to teach.

18| no brakes: din djarin x reader | hate fucking

you have a bounty on your head, din takes the job.

19| tag, you're it: frankie morales x reader | pray/predator kink, gun kink

once a month you and frankie play a game.

20| after hours: javier peña x steve murphy x reader x horacio carillo

after another day of being unsuccessful in catching escobar, you offer the boys another way of relief.

21| pumpkin seeds: poe dameron x reader | sex pollen, outdoors

you and poe fin yourself on a pumpkin infested planet, however the flowers that surround them seem to be poisonous.

22| arise sun: william tell x reader | pussy slapping

William Tell is a dangerous man. You should’ve known better than to piss him off. 

23| one more hour: marcus pike x reader | monsterfucking

you and marcus are asked to investigate an old manor that might have stolen paintings. however, due to problems with your schedule, Marcus heads there before you, getting himself cursed while investigating. You find him, or at least something that you think is him, at the manor two days later.

24| home economics: javi g x reader | voyeurism

Javi sees you naked for the first time which should be a good thing, but you have idea that he can see you through the window.

[tinandabin]

please tumble for the live of God let me give paragroah breaks plsZe

Yandere Mitsuri x Reader

High school AU.

____________________

<senpai kanroji>

hey [name]!! you are coming

to school tmrw right? :))

<[name]>

yes I am! why do u

ask?

<senpai kanroji>

oh, nothing much!! just wanted

to tell u that I will bring a home-

made bento for u! <33

<[name]>

aww ty! u don't

really have to tho.

<senpai kanroji>

no no, I insist!!

<[name]>

aaa, thank u!! I will ttyl <3

senpai kanroji unsent a message

______

To be honest, you always found Kanroji Senpai weird..I mean, she was already pretty affectionate with everyone. But it was clear to see her favouritism over you..She was just always so, so, so, affectionate with you. You feel suffocated everytime you are with her.

You were looking forward to not eating lunch with her tomorrow, but it seems like that can't happen. I mean, you could've refused her offer..and you did so, not as direct, but you tried. Besides, you wouldn't want your reputation to go down in the drains because who would reject such a sweet girl and make her cry? Whosoever will do that is obviously a monster! Senpai Kanroji has everyone wrapped around her finger..thankfully, not you.

Sighing heavily, you pulled the covers over yourself and went to sleep, dreading the next day. Not only because of school but Kanroji Senpai too. Hopefully, you'll live.

_________________

"Hey [name]!!," Senpai Kanroji enthusiastically waved at you, motioning for you to come to sit beside her. "Come, sit beside me!!" She smiled at you, blushing like crazy. Like girl, have some self-control.

Nervously laughing and trying your best to ignore all the eyes staring at you, you sat beside her and tried to smile at her. Keyword: tried. "Ahaha...What's up??" You asked because you don't like awkwardness, the people staring at you also don't, no one likes awkwardness.

"Awww," Kanroji Senpai cooed at your adorableness and hugged you, tightly, and softly muttered into your neck, "You are so cute!!"

Excitedly she got off you and presented you with the bento she made for you, and honestly, the smell of the food was really fucking delicious. Gordon Ramsay approved. And to be honest, you would have snatched the bento box out of her hands had she been someone else. But she isn't. This is so sad, Alexa play despacito. All of a sudden, Alexa starts playing despacito, having somehow found her way into your mind. She starts taking control over your body, and in no time are you the one singing Despacito.

Enough BULLSHITTING.

a/n: THIS IS THE AUTHOR GETTING BACK TO WRITING, BUCKLE UP U ALL. THIS IS A WARNING BECAUSE A LOT OF ANGST IS GONNA BE COMING UP IN NEW FICS. AFTER ALL, I AM MISERABLE AND SO WILL U ALL BE TOO.

"Say aaah, [Name]-Chan!" Mitsuri told you as she held a piece of fish ( cooked, duh ) with her chopsticks.

Awkwardly, you opened your mouth and wished you could just poof out of existence, like, I CAN FEED MYSELF MITSURI. THANK YOU NOT VERY MUCH.

"Good girl!" She chirped as she practically shoved the piece of fish down your throat, too eagerly waiting for you to finish eating. Like, is this shit poisoned? ( BINGO! You guessed it. )

After a good while of Mitsuri happily watching you eat, lunch was finally fucking over. Thank God, didn't think you could bear her anymore... The way she was watching you eat! Creep. She definitely could not ever pass your vibe check.

You headed towards your class, thankful that you and Mitsuri don't share the same class.. Because she's a senior. Atleast you will have some peace.

In no time school was over and all of you were allowed to head home. You had been feeling pretty sleepy after lunch, I mean the food Mitsuri made was pretty bomb, okay? Can't really blame you.

Yawning, you tiredly grabbed your bag, as you lazily started walking towards the exit. Most of the kids were heading towards their clubs, you hadn't really chosen which club to join yet. Besides, it is optional. So, the lesser the work the better for you. Studies are hard enough as they are.

Stopping by your locker, you changed your shoes and exited the school without seeing Senpai Mitsuri, thank God. It's a good thing she is in the cooking club. You wouldn't have to deal with her.

The more you walked, the more tired you got. Your eyes started feeling heavy and your body too. Before you knew it, you couldn't even walk properly. Leaning against a wall, you sat down there. Gradually, black dots started surrounding your vision and you were knocked out cold.

a/n: I'm gonna make a part 2 HAHHAHAHA. I HAVE NO idea what to do now. happy I got this out now 💪 it's been in my drafts for months now

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