#I have been here before. Blaming myself for things out of my control

[webbedphantom]

He was quiet for a while after that, just trying to think of what to say.

On one hand, she was right. His excuses were pathetically thin, and she was right to tear through them. And... she was right about how close he'd come to death tonight. He should've called for backup, if not from her, then from someone. Even if that new spell would turn them against each other, she probably couldn't have hit both of them at once. But... if she'd gotten hurt... if he'd been forced to hurt her, he'd never forgive himself for that.

He physically winced when she started sniffling. The pain and sadness in her voice hurt him worse than anything he'd felt tonight. He wanted to back down, to apologize, wipe her tears away and promise to never do something so stupid ever again.

... And then he remembered why he'd done it in the first place. The nightmares he'd had since the day she'd gotten her powers, the day he nearly lost her for good. He knew she was capable, hell she was probably already a better fighter than he was, and she hadn't even had her Persona for a month.

But he'd let her down before. He couldn't get to her in time, couldn't save her from Akechi's attack. Even though she was stronger now, even though she was now immune to the thing that nearly killed her, she wasn't invincible either. What if it happened again? What if she needed him to help her, and he failed again?

He couldn't let that happen. He had to keep that scenario from ever being a possibility... even if it meant she'd hate him for it.

He couldn't help but let out a laugh when she mentioned his ego, though it was quiet. Small. Pathetic. He had a lot of problems, but an ego wasn't one of them. He could talk a big game, carry himself with confidence, especially in the suit, but in reality he didn't think that highly of himself. He didn't see himself as something worth protecting. That the only thing he was good for was helping people as the Spider, because that was the only time he felt like he was worth anything at all.

That... and one other time. The time he spent with her. She made him think that maybe he was something more than just the costume, that he had worth outside of the mask.

But who was he kidding? The only person in the whole world that made him feel like he was worth a damn, and he'd brought her to the verge of tears. He wasn't worth anything. He was a disgrace.

He didn't deserve her. He didn't deserve to even look at her.

"I'm sorry..." He said finally, his voice as quiet as his prior laugh had been... and just as pathetic. "You're right... I should've called for backup..."

He could give her that much, alleviate her fears somewhat... but he couldn't give her what she wanted. He couldn't put her in a situation where she'd have to rely on him again.

He'd just let her down. He'd just get her hurt.

"But you're-" He paused. How could he phrase this properly? What would convince her to not try to fight beside him? Would anything??

"... you're not ready for what I'm up against. You're close, but you're not there yet."

Liar. She was more ready than he was. But he couldn't put her at risk. She needed to be safe from his failures, at least until he could bring Akechi down... maybe for longer.

Maybe forever.

"I-I'll ta-take-" Another pause. That last thought made him choke up a bit. He didn't like it. He was nothing without her... but maybe he was nothing anyway. Maybe she was better off without him holding her back. "I'll take some time off... focus on healing up."

He stood from her bed, despite the fact that she was barely even half done. And this entire time, he'd never looked her way, averting his eyes, facing away from her. He couldn't bring himself to do it, no matter how much he wanted to.

"I'll talk to the others about getting you out into the field more. They'd be better for you... better teachers. I'd just slow you down-"

That last part was said faintly, more for his sake than hers. A reminder of why he had to do this. Even though it hurt like hell, far worse than any blow he'd taken tonight.

He summoned his costume back upon him, still in tatters as he hadn't fully recovered. Though he didn't think he ever would.... not from this.

"Thanks for the patch up. I should be good to get home now..."

Makoto listened to his explanation with a rather disappointed scowl on her face as she continued to patch his wounds. As much as she was used to his foolishness, this was the last straw for her. The stress of worrying about him all the time, paired with her newfound abilities to fight alongside him and still getting shafted into the "damsel girlfriend" role had become far too much for her.

She glared at him angrily as he tried to make the excuse that backup wouldn't have helped. "What do you mean?! Aaron, you could have been killed tonight! Even if I'd gotten there a little late, I could have helped! You can't fight everything all on your own. Not anymore. One of these days you're going to fight someone for the last time and how the hell do you think your friends will feel when the news hits? H-how... How do you think I'll feel?" She lectured, her voice cracking at the last part.

Makoto paused, gently wiping at her eyes and sniffling. "You're not invincible, Aaron. And I can fight. I'm just as capable as you. Especially now. You can't just keep shafting me to the side like this cause your ego wants you to be the star of the show all the time."

[cowboysmp3]

being annoyed about stuff and things often is a part of the human experience <3 u just need to learn to identify what annoyed feelings r justified in acting on and which r instead for u to just feel

[burreauxsworld]

Ours To Keep (2) | Joe Burrow

Angst/Fluff

Summary: Joe doesn’t have the best reaction to your news, and it causes some tension between the two of you.

••••••

You stared at Joe in confusion as he laughed.

“Good one, Y/N” he says, still laughing. “But if you’re going to play a prank on me, at least come up with a better joke” he adds as he calms down. “Joe, I’m not joking” you tell him quietly. “The acting was seriously top tier. How have you never shown that to me before? I mean the tears looked so real-“

“Joe I’m not kidding. I’m not trying to play a prank on you” you cut him off. “I’ve been nauseous all week, my boobs are incredibly sore, and I missed my period over a week ago” you explain, and he lets out a sigh. “There’s no possible way you could be pregnant. You’re on birth control. You have that thing in your arm” he reminds you, smiling again. “I think you’re being paranoid” he says causing you to scoff.

“Joe, this is serious-“

“You’re not pregnant. You sound crazy” he says pulling back from you. “Have I been working you too hard? Maybe it’s stress. Take the rest of the day off-“

“That doesn’t explain the positive pregnancy test on my bathroom counter” you argue starting to get aggravated. “I’ve been ignoring it for weeks. Hoping maybe I was a little bit crazy. But we weren’t exactly the most careful-“

“So you’re turning this around on me?” Joe asks, his jaw clenched. “No, I’m not-“

“That’s how it sounds. You were irresponsible and now you’re paying the price for it and taking it out on me” he spits with his eyes full of anger. “Last time I checked it takes two people for something like this to happen. I didn’t have sex with myself” you retort and he scoffs. “How could you let this happen? Do you know how much shit this is going to cause? I don’t need this right now. I have to go back to practice, and to be honest I’m not sure I even want you here right now. You’re dismissed for the day” Joe walked out of the office leaving you stunned.

You knew he might not have the best reaction but you didn’t think it would be like this. Joe has never spoken to you that way, even when he was at his worst. With tears in your eyes, you gathered your bag and slowly began to make your way toward the parking lot.

You had a lot of things running through your head, but one rash thought lingered and it made you sick to your stomach. It was going to be a long night.

•••

Later that night, you’re sitting on your couch with your laptop open in your lap. You decided to throw yourself into work, and Joe had a foundation event coming up that Robin asked you to help organize. Even mad at him you couldn’t let this go undone. His foundation was one of the most important things to him, and you kept telling yourself you were more so doing this for his parents. You’re about halfway through editing the announcement picture that would eventually be posted to the foundations instagram, when you heard a knock at your door.

Furrowing your brows, and setting your laptop on the glass coffee table, you walked over to the door and looked through the peep-hole. Your heart lurched at the sight of him. You open the door, and the two of you stare at each other for about a minute.

“You’re not here to throw me down the stairs, are you?” You ask, half joking.

Joe rolls his eyes, “can I come in?”

You move to the side and let him into your home. He kicks his shoes off, knowing you don’t like shoes on your light colored carpet. “What’s up? Why’d you stop by?” You ask, a sigh escaping your lips. You know exactly why he’s here, but you wanted to see what he had to say for himself. “I went home today after practice and had some time to think. The way I treated you was wrong and just absolutely disgusting” he says, stepping toward you, and you take a step back.

“I deserve that.” He says running his hand through his hair. “I never should have blamed you for this. This is just as much my fault, if not more. You did your part being safe, I’m the one that decided not to use condoms. That’s on me. I want you to know how sorry I am about today,” Joe says. You guys never breaking eye contact.

“You’re probably terrified, and I didn’t make it any easier-“

“That’s for sure.” You mutter. “Joe, I never meant for this to happen. And I’ve done a lot of thinking myself. I’m going to keep this baby. I’m not asking you for any help, I’m not asking you for any money. I’m fully prepared to do this by myself. I’ve started looking for another job-“

“Hang on a second-“

“You can sign your rights away. We don’t even have to tell anyone that the baby is yours. You’ll have no ties to it” you ramble, and he shakes his head. “That’s not what I want.” He states, his voice firm. “This is my kid, Y/N. Not just something I can pretend doesn’t exist. I want to do this with you, if you’ll let me” he pleads, reaching out to grab your hand.

“You really hurt me today, Joe.” You told him. “You made me feel like I ruined your life”

“I know, and I regret everything I said to you. I can’t even put into words how sorry I am. You didn’t ruin my life. Neither one of us could have anticipated this happening” he assures you. “I am so so sorry” he says, pulling you into his arms, wrapping you in a tight hug. “I’m still very upset with you. It’s going to take some time to fully forgive you” you tell him, and he frowns, but he understands.

“I have a doctors appointment in the morning, if you’d like to come” you offer. “It’s just to confirm everything and get a due date and all that fun stuff”

“I’ll drive and buy you breakfast” he says, looking down at you. “Speaking of food, I’m starving” you groan, and he lets out a laugh. “Alright, I guess I’ll feed you” he jokes, making his way to your kitchen. “Ooh, can you make that pasta that I like? I’m pretty sure I have all of the ingredients” you ask with pleading eyes.

“Yes, I can make you the pasta. Pick a movie, and shut that laptop. Work is over for the day” he orders.

“Sir, yes, sir”

•••

The Next Day

“Well congratulations, Y/N. You are indeed pregnant,” the doctor says, entering the room after your test results finally come back. “Both the urine and blood test came back positive. Judging by the numbers on your results it’s looking like you’re around 8 or 9 weeks pregnant, that’s around 2 months and a week.. Which would make your due date sometime in February, but we can’t be sure until we do an ultrasound” the doctor explains.

“The next course of action is going to be removing your nexplanon and doing an ultrasound” she explains.

You look over at Joe, who’s listening intently. He hasn’t said much since the two of you got here, but you’re giving him time. He wants to be involved, but he processes things a different way. You respect that.

“We can schedule the ultrasound for about a week from now. I don’t have any available ultrasound techs today. So I have a list of appointments, and you can choose what works best for you and your schedule. All of them are on Monday. There’s a 9am, 10am, 12pm, 3pm, and 4pm-“

“We can do Monday at 9am” Joe says, and you look over at him. “You have practice on Monday” you remind him. He shrugs. “We only watch film for the first two hours on Monday, you know that. They’ll be fine without me for an hour” he assures you. “We’ll do Monday at 9am” you tell the doctor, knowing Joe wasn’t going to let up.

“Perfect. Stop at the front desk to check out on your way back out. See you Monday. Congratulations, again” she smiles as she leaves the room. You look back over at Joe. “You okay?” You ask, and he nods. “I’m good. Now let’s go get you guys some breakfast,” he says, and a warm feeling spreads through your chest. You slip your hand in his and he leads you out of the room.

•••

“What can I get you guys to drink?”

“I’ll take a coffee with extra cream and sugar” you say, and Joe protests. “You can’t have coffee. Caffeine isn’t good for the baby” he says, and you shoot him a glare that’s strong enough to cut. The waitress looks between the two of you hesitantly. . “I can have a little bit of caffeine,” you argue, and look back at waitress. “Ignore him. I’ll have a coffee” you say with a smile. It’s Joe’s turn to roll his eyes, as he orders a water for himself.

Once the waitress walks away, you kick Joe’s shin under the table. “You’re not going to be one of those overprotective fathers who dictates what I eat, drink, and do. I’m an adult. I can handle myself”

He lets out a sigh, knowing not to argue because your hormones are high right now. “Please do your research before acting like a control freak. I can have up to 200 grams of caffeine a day,” you tell him, and he sighs. “I just want to keep the two of you safe,” he admits, and you start to feel bad for going off on him.

“I appreciate that, Joey, but we’re good. We can handle a little bit of caffeine” you assure him, a slight smile on your face. The waitress returns with your drinks, and the proceeds to ask if you’re ready to order your food. “Can I have two over medium eggs, with hash browns, and toast?” The waitress writes down your order, Joe looks confused, but orders his blueberry pancakes and the waitress goes to put the order in.

“You hate eggs,” Joe comments.

“The baby wants them.”

Joe laughs, tossing his head back. “What the baby wants, the baby gets”

~~~~~~~

Ahhh our guys won yesterday!! I’m so proud of them :)

[hanaonesflower]

“let me do this for you.”

“let me get that for you.”

“don’t worry, I’ll take care of it.”

when nanami was around, it was like being watched by a hawk. not in a bad way of course, just not a way you're probably used to. he is always on it, taking care of everything from beginning to end, hell bent on you not ever lifting a finger and actually bar you from doing it, even behind his back.

"seriously, kento, I can do it myself!"

"absolutely not, you worked all day, when you come home, I take care of you."

you try to bargain, dishing out facts that he, too, has a full time job that usually pushes him to the brink of exhaustion that he may or may not recover from, yet, here he is, elbows deep in dough, insistent on making pasta from scratch. according to a recipe that you may have briefly mentioned weeks ago that you wanted to try.

you tried to pick up the knife and dice the tomatoes or turn on the stove, he shoos you away.

"this is getting out of control, kento."

"you can help me by taking a nice warm long bath, honey."

nanami knows what he's doing, the majority of the time. but will he ever express that he fumbles from time to time? never. not that his ego is inflated, but because he has prided himself for being to care for you boundlessly.

so when you leave the bath and find kento with his hand in a bucket of ice water, you realize something have gone south in the kitchen.

"kento! what happened?!"

"nothing to worry about my l-"

"enough! tell me, now."

your stern voice and attitude stun him, he's never seen you like this before. his behavior is downright concerning, he hasn't always been this way though. sure, he loves by serving, but he isn't always this stubborn or ridiculously protective. you have always cooked together, why would it be different this time, or the last few times within the past couple of months. nanami isn't unreasonable, but he can be if something pricked at his pride.

"I may have burned myself with the hot steam."

"may have? your skin is having a terrible reaction! for a smart man you can be so clumsy sometimes."

"it's not that bad."

you glare.

"okay, it's pretty burnt and it hurts."

"I bet it does."

you slowly pull his hand out from the ice bucket and lead him to the kitchen table and command him to sit still when you fetch the first aid. his palm is raw from the burn and his face twists in pain when you apply some pressure.

there isn't much conversation exchanged between you and him, but something is definitely hanging above your heads. kento seems to be closed off to it, but you're willing to get to the root of things.

"you haven't been yourself lately."

silence.

"I feel like this is not just about providing for me, something happened, and it affected you."

kento looks saddened by this. you are spot on. something did happen.

a few months ago, during a dinner party amongst friends, kento found himself begrudgingly involved in unpleasant conversations with his colleagues, the way they audaciously questioned his ability to care for his partner when he was always away on work trips or spending extra time at work. he took it to heart, kento questioned himself. he realized, that even though his colleagues were terribly annoying and invasive, they made some considerable points. he made the executive decision to fully take over, spinning a complete 180 on you. at first you thought it was sweet, until it became authoritarian.

"that's really how you feel?"

"have I been absent to you, y/n?"

you contemplate for a while, you truly wish he is around more, but you always understand the nature of his job.

"I do wish I can see you more often, when you had that 2-week long vacation, I was able to spend such amazing quality time with you, and it was awesome, but I also understand how your job is. I didn't want to come in between that."

"so I have been absent." he moaned defeatedly.

"please don't blame it on yourself like this, it's not healthy, I still love you, kento."

"this is all my fault, y/n, I should have been there for you more."

truthfully, you wish he was, but once again, you are both stuck between a rock and a hard place.

"have you been doing all this to somehow compensate?"

"is it working?"

he is trying to humor you, although at quite a horrid time, you still crack a smile.

"I think it's very kind of you."

he sighs.

"please, forgive me, my love. I became what you called a workaholic, I tried to get more hours to provide for you, only to come short in other aspects."

"I'm not an unemployed housewife, kento."

“this isn’t my way of saying that you are incapacitated in any way, i just wish that you didn’t have to worry about anything,” he groaned from the incessant gnawing of the antiseptic on his burnt wound.

“kento, this is a partnership, you’re not my servant and i’m not a spoiled brat,” he felt a little silly, nanami knew this fact yet he felt impotent in this sense. he opened and closed his lips, hoping to get his point across even further but nothing seemed good enough at theis point, he’s done fighting.

“whatever you’re going to say, it’s not going to change the fact that i love you,” you silence him.

“then can i say that i love you, too?”

“that, you can.”

⭒˚‧ ︵‿⭒ཐིཋྀ ཐིཋྀ⭒‿︵ ‧˚⭒ ⭒˚‧ ︵‿⭒ཐིཋྀ ཐིཋྀ⭒‿︵ ‧˚⭒ ⭒˚‧

note: PHEEeewww… it’s really good to be back :33 this piece shall be the redebut as it is one of my cuter fics. going back with smut pieces after such a long hiatus didn’t feel right so – soft nanami is always the way to go!! more content will be coming soon (smut included >.>), stay tuned ( ˘ ³˘)

[beuxwhoyouare]

Escaping Holiday Responsibilities

You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and all the boys. And who can forget about singing Hanerot Halalu after lighting the menorah. There’s symbols and entities representing all of the holidays. But outside of the season we enjoy our peace and quiet. Sometimes though a season is so rough you can’t really blame an entity for wanting to get away.

I may or may not be Santa Claus. I’d say the best perk about the gig is that when the time comes you’re almost guided to your successor who then dons the classic look. So it’s a give and take. I mean having the power to fulfill lists of gifts you desire is great, but acquiring the look of a tubby bearded old man isn’t all that. The coolest thing though is you may not know it, but just because you don’t write a list doesn’t mean you don’t have holiday desires. I can still deliver gifts based on the list you make in your hearts. Cute as hell right? I’m basically a mind reader!

Before all this Claus business, I was unemployed and recently divorced when I received the call to step into the good ol boots. So a gig is a gig. I took it and ran, but that was like 30 years ago. So now once I retire I’m actually gonna look old and ragged.

So there I was last night delivering gifts at this random place in Chicago. Doing my best to stay quiet, delivering gifts as low key as possible when CRAAAAAACK! I stepped on a large glass ornament I somehow missed. I thought I was in the clear after no one came to check what happened and as I headed on my way out a baseball bat swung at my head.

I took the hit like a champ but when I turned around to see I saw a man standing there in black sweatpants and a sleeveless shirt with the bat ready to swing again.

“Ho ho hey hey wait. I’m literally Santa.” I whisper yelled while showing snowy crystals come out of my glove.

Right as he began to swing again I pulled more tricks out of my hat.

“I know your name is Russell O’Connor. You got a gunmetal tricycle as a 4 year old because you thought the red ones the store had were tacky and wanted to look tough!”

That’s when he stopped mid-swing.

“How-how did you know that pervert? Have you been watching me for years?”

I began to hear his inner list….a young man now in his mid-20s regretting his life decisions to get a girl knocked up as a teen? Interesting. He desires to get away from the so-called mess he made.

“I can offer you a way out of the mess you made. If that’s what your true hearts wish is this Christmas?!” I pleaded to not be beaten once again.

“How do you know what I want freak?”

“Bro I’m Santa, I know when you’ve been like bad or good and whatever. Listen do you want to get away from the mess you made or what?”

“Yes okay but like how are you going to do it? You’re not going to kill me or anything?”

“Honestly no one’s really ever wished for this so I gotta be able to do it somehow. That’s the Santa magic!”

“Okay let’s go for it. Do it! Get me out of here!”

I closed my eyes and rubbed my gloved hands together and then pulled them apart. As I pulled them apart a spark started forming but I wasn’t sure what to do with it. I tried to hold it steady but before I knew it, the spark grew too wild to control. The energy then turned white and exploded.

There was a ringing and we both yelled but then black.

When I woke up I found myself pushing up from a bed? That’s weird I don’t remember finishing all my deliveries. I reached up to scratch my beard but instead of my long luscious white beard a more close shaved beard grazed my hand. Wait where are my gloves? And my beard?

I looked down at the bed I didn’t recognize before looking back up to walk over to a nearby restroom with the night light on. The dim glow painted a picture I couldn’t believe. Surely I’m dreaming?

I fumbled around the foreign room before locating the light switch, only to have the bright lights confirm what I was seeing. I raised both arms and posed….

“No fucking way!?” The cursing surprised me, being a Claus the job prevents your mouth from ever even forming a curse word.

I’m Russell? But the Santa step down process just returns you to your normal self not swaps you with someone? How did this? Could my desires have matched with his conflicting my magics intent?

I lifted the shirt barely hiding anything of my new body I now resided in. Woah…I wasn’t much of a gym person in my former life but maybe there’s reason to be. I mean look at this beef? I reached my muscular hand up to my new proud chest and squeezed. Ahhh grazing my new nipple I revealed a new found sensitivity I never previously had. Looks like that’s going to be fun, I nearly salivated.

I can do adult things again and live a life again! No more having to spend months working to achieve someone else’s dreams. Or maybe I’ll fulfill other dirtiest dreams. I mean this body should go to work somehow.

I’m sure OnlyFans would love to see how thick I am everywhere. It’s time to be a family man settle down the right way and make a good living by selling the best gift I’ve ever given myself.

My new tool hardening nearly pulling down my sweatpants waistband itself. I grabbed it before taking a peak at my new equipment. Ohhhhh looks like I’ll still be delivering gifts to quite a few people in different ways with this beer can.

[helenofsparta2]

Percy did nothing wrong in Battle of the Labyrinth

Buckle up, this is going to be a very, very long post.

I’ve already made two posts about Percy getting blamed for things he had little to no control over, or some criticism just being extremely unfair towards him, but I’ve never really talked about battle of the labyrinth.

Especially on sides like tiktok, people really drag Percy for how he acted in this book, and I have never really understood why, so since Percy is my favourite RR character, I’ve finally decided to make a post trying to untangle this whole mess.

Generally I’ve seen three main criticisms against him in this book. If you know of others, please let me know.

Him & Calypso

His relationship with Annabeth

The situation with Rachel

Calypso

The criticism I’ve seen here is mostly based on these three topics:  

He didn’t immediately go back to Camp Half-blood

He forgot about Annabeth and his friends while spending time being happy with Calypso

He hesitated when Hephaestus told him he could go back & called Calypso his biggest what if

Let’s tackle these one by one.

He didn’t immediately go back to Camp Half-blood after waking up

Well, he … couldn’t.

Shortly before arriving on Ogygia, Percy had gotten burned alive with lava. A feeling he described as a pain “worse than anything he’d ever felt” (194) .  And He’d blown up a volcano, an action so powerful, the mortal authorities were forced to evacuate almost half a million people, which made ash fall as far as Lake Tahoe in Vancouver and closed off the Mount st. Helens area within a hundred-mile radius.  

Just a quick reminder of Percy’s physical state after all of that:

“I was really weak. I couldn’t stay on my feet more than a few hours. Whatever I’d done in Mount St. Helens had drained me like nothing else I’d ever experienced.” (203)

I woke up feeling like I was still on fire. My skin stung. My throat felt as dry as sand. (196)

I tried to sit up. My muscles felt like they were melting. (196)

I looked as if I’d lost ten kilos I couldn’t afford to lose.” (198)

My knees buckled, and I would’ve landed face-first in the grovel if Calypso hadn’t caught me. (200)

Maybe I was just really weak and thin (200)

Even after a few days/ weeks his legs were still stiff, and he was still getting dizzy from standing up for too long (203)

I hadn’t been in control of myself in that mountain. I’d released so much energy I’d almost vaporized myself, drained all the life out of me.

So, he was not able to physically leave, despite very much wanting to.

2. He forgot about Annabeth and his friends, while enjoying his time with Calypso

Also pretty easy to defend, because, again, he didn’t.

He never stopped thinking about Annabeth, and his other friends. Not once.

Even before waking up, Percy said their names in his sleep so often that Calypso knew them when he woke up (p. 199)

His first reaction to Calypso telling him that he could heal in safety was:  

“But my friends-“

“Annabeth”, she said. “And Grover and Tyson.”

“Yes!” I said. “I have to get back to them. They’re in danger.” (199)

He tried to use his empathy link with Grover several times on Ogygia to find out if he, Tyson and Annabeth were okay, but couldn’t make any contact (P. 203)

“I thought about Annabeth, Grover and Tyson constantly.” (P. 204)

The first thing he does after Hephaestus arrives on Ogygia is asking him about Annabeth’s well-being (207)

3. He hesitated when Hephaestut told him he could go back

This is the first time, the sentiment is somehow connected to the text, because Percy did hesitate for a little bit:

“I wanted to say yes. Of course I would. But the words were stuck in my throat. I found myself looking out at the lake, and suddenly the idea of leaving seemed very hard. (209)

Afterwards, he walked along the beach for several hours, thinking of what to do next (210)

But if you actually read the chapter, you very easily understand that Percy never really, seriously considered staying:

When Hephaestus insinuated, he might not return to camp half-blood he immediately said: “What do you mean? Of course I’m coming back.”

The first thing he says, after Calypso offered him to stay forever on Ogygia was: “But… my friends.” (211)

His immediate verbal response after Calypso admitted she was in love with him was to say: “I can’t. I would never do anything to hurt you, but my friends need me. I know how to help them now. I have to get back.” (212)

We also need to consider his reasons for hesitating in the first place. He did not hesitate because he was in love with Calypso. Yes, he thought she was cute when she laughed, thought she was more beautiful than Aphrodite, and didn’t want to make her feel sad, but she is not the reason he hesitated. His biggest what if is not Calypso herself. His biggest what if is what she represents: Peace, Happiness, and a way to avoid the responsibility of the prophecy.

Through Stolen Chariot, we know that Percy’s biggest fear is making the wrong decision and dooming everyone he cares about:  

“I stood paralyzed. This was the moment I had always dreaded: the prophecy that was supposed to come about when I was sixteen. I would make a choice that would either save or destroy Olympus. Now the moment was here, and I had no idea what to do. The camp was burning. My friends looked at me, begging for help. My heart pounded. I couldn’t move. What if I did the wrong thing? (The Stolen Chariot)

The first thing Calypso says to convince him to stay is: “You could leave the fight to others, Percy Jackson. You could escape your prophecy.”(211)

He also considered the possibility that it might be best for his friends if they believed him to be dead:

“Now I found out I’d nearly destroyed the Northwest US and almost woken the most horrible monster ever imprisoned by the gods. Maybe I was too dangerous. Maybe it was safer for my friends to think I was dead. (208)” She was cute when she laughed.

 

And even if he did develop a little crush on her, which I don’t even believe, I just think he really liked her and felt bad for her, how would that be his fault or something we could blame him for????  Since when can people control who they have or don’t have a crush on???

And the most important thing is: he left. As soon as he knew how to, as soon as he was healthy enough, he left. He went back to his friends, missing out on a peaceful and probably very happy life, shouldered the prophecy once again, and left.

His relationship with Annabeth

I can not say enough how much Percy actually supported Annabeth during the course of battle of the labyrinth

He reassured her constantly, that she would do a good job in leading this quest, when she doubted herself: (“You’re doing great. Besides, we never know what we’re doing. It always works out. Remember Circe’s Island?” She snorted. (P. 120))

He hugged her when she needed a hug: Then she did something that really surprised me. She blinked back tears and put out her arms. I stepped forward and hugged her. (Chapter 4, P. 76)

He trusted her; despite knowing she didn’t tell him the entirety of her prophecy

There are only three points in which they have some kind of conflict in. One of them is the whole thing with Calypso, but I’ve already dealt with that. The other two are the scene after Kronos overtook Luke’s body and then the whole situation with Rachel.

The scene after Kronos overtook Luke’s body

One of the main criticisms people have of Percy here is that he didn’t comfort Annabeth immediately after that scene. While that criticism is somewhat true, it's important to note that he didn’t act out of any malicious intent. After Annabeth collapsed, sobbing with her head between her knees, he didn’t rush to her side—but this was not because he meant to hurt her.

Percy himself was shocked and traumatized by the experience

After she asked him what happened, Percy was as gentle as he could be when he told her: “He gave himself over to Kronos,” I said. “I’m sorry Annabeth, but Luke is gone.” (291)

He only snaps at her, when she continues to defend Luke and accuses Percy of wanting him to be evil: “You want him to be evil, is that it?” Annabeth yelled. “You didn’t know him before, Percy. I did!”  “What is it with you?” I snapped. “Why do you keep defending him?” (292)

If we’re being honest, there is nothing Percy could have said to her, which would have helped her, and with the history he has with Luke, I personally can’t blame him for not being able to comfort her about his death or being annoyed that she still defends him after everything

As a reminder, at this point in time, Luke had tried to kill Percy multiple times, told him that he should have died in Tartarus, tortured Annabeth and was completely okay with killing every single kid in camp half-blood

He still wanted to comfort her after that, but he simply didn’t know how to: I wanted to comfort her, but I didn’t know how. I still felt stunned, like Kronos’s time-slowing effect had affected my brain. I just couldn’t comprehend what I’d seen. Kronos was alive. He was armed. And the end of the world was probably close at hand. (292)

Avoiding an argument might have actually been the smartest thing he could have done after that

When it was time to continue on their way, he still treated Annabeth gently “I knelt next to Annabeth. “Hey, I’m sorry. We need to move.” (292)

Did Annabeth need someone to talk to? Yes, obviously. Was Percy snapping back at her unnecessary and the last thing she needed in the moment? Also yes. This girl has suffered an unimaginable lot in this book and all the previous ones, especially because of Luke.  I’m not blaming her here for the way she acted. She loved Luke, and this might be one of the worst fates imaginable for a loved one. Everyone would have cracked in one way or another.

But is it also insane to criticize a 14-year-old boy, because he did not properly comfort his friend, who grieved the death of a guy, who tried to kill that 14-year old boy for the last two years? Also, yes.

They were two traumatized teenagers with the weight of the world on their shoulders, in a very shitty situation, and I think blaming either of them for how they reacted in this moment is entirely unfair.

Overtaking her quest, by asking Rachel for help

So, I hope we all realize, that this is a stupid argument, and I don’t need to elaborate on why, right? Like, they needed Rachel’s help. Obviously, it’s shitty for Annabeth that she had to rely on a mortal girl, especially a girl with a crush on Percy, but that doesn’t change the fact that they didn’t have another choice. Rachel was vital for the success of their quest,

Percy also sometimes told Annabeth to lay off Rachel, but, like, Annabeth was acting mean towards her, and Percy is a nice person, who knows that Rachel didn’t deserve this treatment.

I think these are all of the criticisms I have seen, and as a really huge fan of Percy, I’m getting so tired of seeing all of them. Please inform me if I have overlooked any!!!

[versairic]

Helpful friend | LN

Warnings — alcohol

In which you just wanted to help lando

or

In which rules are suddelny broken

▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄

The bass was literally pounding in my ears, while the floor beneath my feet seemed to vibrate more with every step I took.

The lights were dimmed and every now and then a few colorful lights flashed on for a few seconds. It smelled of sweat and alcohol.

Sweaty bodies rubbed against each other so that there was barely room to squeeze past.

My mood slowly hit rock bottom as I tried to get away with saying 'May I? ' which left my mouth in a continuous loop, squeezed past the dancing crowd.

Tonight should actually have been a good night. I was in a club in London with Lando, Aarav, Ria, Niran and Max Fewtrell.

Lando and I had been back in London for a while, where we had bumped into the part of Team Quardrant that we didn't get to see very often.

We had spent the whole afternoon filming a few challenges for the YouTube channel.

Afterwards, we had been driven here to the club, where we wanted to party a little, just like old times.

Everything had gone well at first, until a stranger spilled the contents of his sticky drink on my lap and I had to queue in the long line to the loo for about 45 minutes until I could somehow wipe the sticky liquid off my dress.

The dark stains had been clearly visible in the bright light of the toilet, despite my panicked rubbing around, unlike now in the lushly lit club. Here you could only guess at the stains.

As I squeezed past sweaty bodies and struggled to keep my mouth shut, my eyes wandered through the crowd, searching.

Hoping to get a better look at one of my friends, I stood on tiptoe, but it didn't help much.

Inwardly, I cursed myself for not having worn higher heels. But they probably wouldn't have helped me in this stupid light, which barely provided any light at all.

An annoyed sigh left my lips when I was bumped into again. My eyes closed reflexively and I waited for another sticky liquid to be poured over my body.

But nothing happened.

I slowly opened my eyes and looked into Ria's face, who was looking at me radiantly. Her lipstick was a little smudged, while her hair sat a little disheveled on her head.

Before I had rushed to the toilet queue, I had left Ria alone on the dance floor, where she had probably continued to dance extensively and wildly, as her appearance told me.

" Hey, there you are! " She shouted over the loud music and wrapped her bare arm around me so that I wouldn't get lost in the crowd again.

" I've been looking all over for you, where are the others? " I also called out to her, whereupon Ria raised her eyebrow in confusion and had to think for a few seconds about what I had just asked her.

I couldn't blame her. Ria had already had a bit of alcohol, so my best friend took a little longer to think.

" Over there! " The dark-haired girl pointed her index finger in a certain direction, where I spotted Lando and Niran.

The two of them were standing on the platform where the DJ booth was located and a DJ was just about to heat up the crowd, so a loud roar went through the crowd and I was sure I would wake up with a headache in the morning.

Of course, where else would Lando be?

My best friend had recently become quite interested in the whole DJ thing, so Lando took every opportunity to look over the shoulder of a DJ at work.

" Are you coming with me? " I asked Ria as I took my eyes off Lando and Niran. But Ria was no longer standing where she had just been, but disappeared straight back into the crowd, which literally swallowed her up.

I took a deep breath and resolved to hold my breath from time to time over the next few minutes as I made my way to the DJ booth. Because there really was nothing more disgusting than the smell of sweat.

I kept getting elbowed in the stomach or back, so that my fingernails began to dig into my palms and I had to control myself not to accidentally kick them.

What felt like an eternity later, I had fought my way to the DJ booth. I leaned my head back to look up.

However, once again there was no sign of the Formula 1 driver.

That couldn't be true. How could everyone keep getting away from me?

Once again, my eyes wandered back and forth frantically as the DJ turned the music up a little louder so that I almost had a sudden hearing loss from the large speakers not far away from me.

Grumbling, I pressed my hands firmly over my ears. I had nothing against going to a club with friends to have a bit of fun and dance the night away.

But if there was one thing I loathed more than anything, it was incredibly loud music, lots of people and the smell of sweat.

" Where are you guys? " I mumbled more or less to myself as I found an empty crate and stood on it without hesitating.

I was finally a bit taller and could clearly see over some of the heads of the dancing and drinking crowd.

From a distance, I could see Max standing at the bar with his girlfriend and Aarav and Niran dancing strangely with Ria.

But where was my best friend?

My heart automatically began to beat a little faster, while a slight fear crept up inside me.

I knew that Lando couldn't handle too much alcohol and that he often forgot when it was time for him to stop because of the so-called peer pressure.

I had already seen Lando do strange things when he was drunk.

Lando was the kind of person who was initially quite funny under the influence of alcohol, but things changed abruptly soon afterwards and the McLaren driver quickly became tired.

I had occasionally found him sleeping in the strangest places, such as in the middle of a hedge, leaning against a tree or in front of a flower store.

Suddenly, I spotted the curly-haired man from afar, pushing open the back door of the club and seemingly disappearing into the backyard.

I quickly jumped down from the crate, almost falling over, but quickly caught myself.

I had to hurry to catch up with Lando in time before the Brit could even begin to think strange thoughts.

With difficulty, I literally boxed my way through the crowd towards the back exit. With every meter I walked, I prayed to find Lando in the backyard.

Maybe he just needed some fresh air or a break from the loud music, which I couldn't blame him for.

As I pushed open the steel door, the cool night air of London came straight at me, making me shiver in my sleeveless dress.

I wrapped my arms protectively around myself as I stepped further into the dark backyard and the door slammed shut with a loud thud and the club's music could only be heard muffled.

But the bass could still be clearly felt, so my knees began to tremble slightly.

The backyard was only lit by a single lamp hanging crookedly from the wall of the house, threatening to fall out of the wall with the next bash.

" Hello? " I asked into the barely lit alleyway. To my right were two large garbage cans and countless cigarette butts. The club staff and some guests always had to disappear here to smoke.

To my left was a residential building with a few lights still on, which I couldn't blame given the volume. Although I rather wondered how anyone could voluntarily move next door to a club.

A narrow corridor between the apartment building and the club led back to the street. But the corridor was pitch black.

" Lando? " I almost whispered as I pulled my cell phone out of my small pocket and turned on the flashlight.

What I was doing here was probably a good start for a horror movie. But to be honest, I only felt the slightest hint of fear, which was probably due to my alcohol intake.

My feet slowly walked towards the corridor, which was now slightly illuminated by my flashlight and I could see a little better.

And then I discovered something.

Lando sat leaning back against the brick wall with his head in his hands.

" Lan! " I shouted, almost relieved, as I ran the last few steps towards my best friend and crouched down in front of him.

He raised his eyes and looked at me. His eyes were slightly glazed and had lost their shine, while he was quite pale around the nose.

He must have thrown up.

" There you are, " he slurred slightly as a smile spread across his lips and he wrapped his arms around me.

Surprised by this embrace, I more or less lost my balance and stumbled onto Lando's lap.

My eyes widened as Lando's mouth let out an 'oops' and he began to giggle.

I felt the heat rise to my cheeks and then I began to clear my throat in embarrassment before quickly rising from his lap.

At any other time I probably would have enjoyed this, but definitely not in a drunken state.

" Are you okay? " Lando inquired anxiously as he stood up and began to sway. Another soft chuckle escaped him as he rested his hands on the wall.

" Shouldn't I ask you if you're okay? " I asked as I carefully grabbed Lando's arm to support him.

" Until just now...No..." he mumbled as he slowly put one foot in front of the other and left the dark backyard with my help.

" And now? " I asked when we had finally left the dark alley behind us and were back on the street, which was still a bit busy.

A few cars and pedestrians were still on the road at this late hour and their presence made me feel a little safer.

" Now yes! " Lando beamed. " Because... because you're here. "

Without being able to do anything about it, my stomach began to tingle slightly thanks to Lando's words.

I knew he was drunk and probably didn't even remember what he was saying, but those words still made me feel pretty warm.

" Are you taking me home? I feel sick and I'm suddenly so tired," Lando sulked and then emphasized his statement with a loud yawn.

" I'll do that, but if you feel sick, let me know straight away, okay? "

Lando nodded tiredly. Before I called us a cab, I wrote to the group of friends that Lando and I were already on our way back.

I hoped that one of them would read the message and not panic and search the whole club for us.

It took a few minutes for Lando and I to wait for the cab. While we waited, the Brit told me some weird story about gorillas and red lollipops, which I didn't even understand the context of, but it had certainly been entertaining.

Lando hadn't said a word the whole cab ride, so I assumed he had fallen asleep.

But when the cab stopped at our address, Lando was suddenly wide awake again, so the British man gave the cab driver far too much money and then jumped out of the car.

Without saying a word to the cab driver, I also jumped out of the car and ran after Lando up the driveway.

" Where is the key? " I asked as I came to a halt next to him and Lando's eyes almost fell shut again.

"Jeans," he mumbled and then lifted his arms to give me more room.

Smiling, I reached into Lando's back trouser pockets and shortly afterwards pulled out the key to unlock the front door.

" This is where I live? " Lando looked around the hallway with wide eyes after I had switched on the light and closed the door behind us.

"yes" , I smiled as I put the key in the little bowl on the sideboard and then took off my shoes and put my bag down next to it.

Lando hated it when someone entered his home wearing shoes. He couldn't understand why you could feel at home with shoes on.

But the drunken Lando didn't seem to mind, because when I told him to go upstairs, the Brit ran up the wooden stairs without taking his shoes off first.

So while Lando ran upstairs, I quickly scurried into the kitchen to fill a glass of water and get an aspirin.

Hoping that Lando had already finished brushing his teeth and was in bed, I ran up to the bedroom.

But the bed was empty.

The glass of water and the aspirin found their place on the bedside table, next to a photo of Lando, his friends and me, before I ran over to the bathroom, where the light was on and Lando was sitting on the closed toilet seat, holding two wrapped toothbrushes in his hand.

" What are you doing? " I asked carefully, but apparently not carefully enough, as the Brit flinched and pointed the pink and yellow toothbrush at me.

"Phew, I thought you were a burglar," he mumbled, which made me giggle quietly.

" What are you doing? " With a nod, I pointed to the toothbrushes Lando was holding.

" I wasn't sure if the toothbrush in the cup belonged there, so I'd better get two new ones from the cupboard there," Lando pointed with his index finger to the cupboard under the sink to make it clear to me where he had got the toothbrushes from.

I know, Lando, I said to him in my mind, because I was the one who had got the toothbrushes for him and put them in the cupboard.

"This is yours, Lan," I explained to Lando as I grabbed the orange toothbrush, moistened it with water and then put toothpaste on it before holding it in front of Lando's nose.

"Cool, orange! " he grinned as he took the toothbrush from me and began to brush his teeth in slow movements, his eyes getting smaller and smaller.

" Are you going to be okay? " I asked him with a grin after I had put the packed toothbrushes away again and watched him for a few seconds.

" Brushing your teeth is sooo tiring. Has it always been? " he mumbled with the toothbrush in his mouth, causing a few blobs to drip onto his black shirt.

" Sometimes it's annoying, yes. Come on, I'll help you so it goes faster. "

I squatted slightly in front of Lando and started to help him brush his teeth. I had the feeling that I was looking at a small child and not a 24-year-old man.

After we had successfully brushed his teeth, I followed Lando over to the adjoining bedroom, where the Brit was already slipping out of his clothes.

By now he was hardly swaying, so I was sure that the alcohol was slowly disappearing from his body.

When Lando stood in front of me shortly afterwards in just his boxer shorts and I saw his muscular chest in the dim light produced by the bedside lamp, I almost fainted.

It would be a lie if I said that I hadn't had my eye on my best friend and found him attractive, because he really was.

However, there was a certain rule in our circle of friends that made it impossible for me to fall in love with my best friend, even though it was somehow way too late.

" Ohh, I forgot," Lando mumbled as he reached for the hem of his boxer shorts and tried to take them off too.

" Stop, stop! " I exclaimed in near panic as I pressed my hands over my eyes to avoid seeing my best friend naked, even though I would have loved the view at another time.

" Huh? " Lando asked, and without having to look at him, I knew that he was now standing there with a totally confused face and furrowed eyebrows.

" They stay on. " I slowly released my hands from my eyes again and was pleased to see that Lando was still wearing his boxers.

The dark-haired man nodded sympathetically.

I pulled a pair of sweatpants and a shirt out of his closet, both of which he was supposed to wear to sleep.

The Brit, however, dropped his butt onto the bed and stretched tiredly while he made no effort to get dressed.

So I had not only brushed my best friend's teeth, but also helped him into his clothes.

"You're the best," Lando mumbled as he finally slipped under the light-colored comforter and adjusted the pillow a little.

" Is there anything else I can do for you? " I asked after picking up his clothes, which were scattered randomly on the floor.

" If I asked you if you would stay, would you? " The gleam in Lando's eyes slowly returned, while a smile spread across his lips.

His question almost made the clothes I had picked up fall out of my hands again.

My heart skipped a beat as my hands began to play nervously with the fabric of Lando's shirt.

This had all gone a bit beyond our previous friendly boundaries. But sleeping in a bed with him would go completely beyond the scope, wouldn't it?

I couldn't just give in to Lando's drunken state because my heart in love wanted to scream yes out loud.

" Please ", he almost begged, while I still didn't move and almost clutched his clothes tightly. " You can wear something of mine to sleep in too. "

This sentence didn't make Lando's request any easier, because the butterflies woke up in my stomach, flapping their wings gently back and forth in my belly and my cheeks became slightly warm.

" U-uh...uhm you know that's against the rules? " I asked in a squeaky voice.

God, why were the rules suddenly so important to me?

" But there's no one here who made the rules. So no one needs to know about this, right? After all, I've always been against the rule that you can't date anyone from your circle of friends. "

Another grin formed on Lando's lips as he slowly pulled back the comforter and stood up.

A few steps later, the Brit stood in front of me.

"Besides, it's already too late for that rule anyway," he breathed more or less into my ear, causing goose bumps to spread all over my body.

And before I could even begin to open my mouth to say something back, Lando walked over to his closet and a short time later pushed some clothes towards me.

" I won't take no for an answer, because I know you feel the same way. "

With these words, Lando pushed me into the bathroom and before he closed the door, he winked at me.

And so he left me with an explosion of emotion.

I didn't know how long it had taken me to collect myself and then leave the bathroom changed.

All my emotions had gone so crazy with Lando's words that even after the long time I had spent in the bathroom, I walked back to the bed with trembling knees.

Lando was still awake. He lay covered up in bed and began to look me up and down with a grin as I scurried over to the free side of the bed.

My cheeks turned red again, so I quickly pulled the comforter over me and started tugging at the hem of Lando's shirt, which I was wearing, from under the comforter.

There was quite a big gap between Lando and me, which the Brit didn't seem to like.

He quickly wrapped his right arm around me and pulled me so close to him that my head automatically rested on his chest.

And so I could hear his rapidly beating heart.

" Do you hear how fast it beats? It always has since you've been around me," he more or less breathed to me as he wrapped his arms protectively around me and I felt a gentle kiss wash over my hair.

Damn, what was he doing to me?

My cheeks heated up again and my heart began to beat faster. Our hearts were probably fighting to see whose heart beat faster.

" Lando ", I whispered into the darkness a few minutes later, but it was too late.

The Brit had already returned to the land of dreams and left me alone with my rapidly beating heart and my thoughts.

And I hoped that he wouldn't regret this when he woke up tomorrow.

[lady-ashfade]

hello :) i’d like to a strawberry cookie for jace (hotd) maybe the stress of the war gets to reader and he helps her out? tyyy 🫶🏼

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Warm Embrace

´*: ･ﾟ⋆˒ Jacaerys Velaryon x Fem!reader

Bakery Event is closed

╰･ﾟ✧☽ Strawberry Macaroon: Imagine + custom trope.

╰･ﾟ✧☽ words: 649

╰･ﾟ✧☽ warnings: terrible thoughts, reader needing comfort, reader just panicking, thoughts about war and loss.

⤻ changed it to macaroon because that’s the sweet you get with your own trope.

˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚ 🥞 ˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚

The sound of tapping at the widows, the whistling of the wind and the angry sea was unsettling. Horrible events have taken place in past weeks, there wasn’t much time to process or show weakness. And it slowly drove you mad. Walking the halls felt like a haunted and angered place, the silence of only your thoughts and steps are as loud as dragons.

Comfort was a scarce resource lately and only found in the arms of your newly wed husband, Prince Jacaerys. Late at night he’d sneak in at unreasonable hours thinking sleep had come over you, while taking you into his arms to rest as well. There was never a night where you found yourself truly asleep without him near, so when he wasn’t there, it was only cruel moments of being alone with the thoughts and fears.

Again, like every night, you had been cursed with not being able to fall in the warm embrace of slumber. Today was different, you did not try and lie down nor read, but sit at the mirror and continue to comb throughout your hair- unconscious to the world around you. Fear entranced every crevice of your mind and made you envision horrible things. Death of those you love, torturing of yourself- horrible and panicked thoughts that you couldn’t pull out of. 

Unknowingly to you the door had been opened and your husband entered your shared chambers, exhausted from his duties. Tonight he found you in a light room and awake, staring at yourself. “My love,” his voice was soft and low so when you didn’t reacted he changed his tone. Once he called it again, and again, then he used your name with still no answer. He was terrified.

It took him a few more tries mixed with him taking your shoulders and bending down next to your neck, eyes looking back at you in the mirror- you finally noticed.

“Jace?” Once you realize he was here you wondered how long you’ve been out, he usually comes back right before sunrise. “What time is it?”

“Just before dawn, my love.” turning his head he placed a kiss on your temple, a exhale left his nose, “What is happening in that little head of yours?”

Look at your hands and picking the skin of your nails, you felt aware of all the emotions coming through. “I am afraid,” you admitted while tears filled your eyes. “Forgive me, you have endured far greater then I have. I must sound like a heartless fool for being under stress.”

A fool was the final thing he’d ever call you. Throughout all of this he saw no signs of worry, or fear from you that it caused him to worry. While Jace has been falling into your arms he failed to return the favor- something he regrets desperately now.

His arms swept themselves around your body, his head rested onto of yours. He was always warm like a true dragon.

“This war is taking a toll on us all, but if anyone is a fool it has to be me. I have failed my duty as your husband to keep you safe from danger, even if that means from your own worries.” You shook your head in protest.

“No one will blame you for being frightened of what’s to come. I, myself am fearful of the bloodshed, even more so to the one’s I love. But we mustn’t let our fears take over,” losing his hold he traveled his hands up to your jaw and titled your head upward.

“Fear controls us, letting us down the path we dread.” you could feel his breath getting closer and his lips almost touching yours, becoming something you craved.

“I will protect you with all my will, the gods have given me the strength to do so.” And once again, your husband’s embrace takes all worries away.

[currentfandomkick]

Started as one thing and veered in another direction, enjoy!

Masterlist here

Last time was a fluke. A mistake… right?

Danny glanced around him, and looked in the mirror.

He looked the same. He didnt know how he even did it the first time. He had blacked out.

He still inspected himself. No gills or scales.

No glow-in-the-dark white on his skin in vertical lines flanked by black. Besides the usual body hair.

No green freckles. He… he can admit to missing those.

He kept checking daily. For any signs that, that form(?) was creeping back into his day to day.

That stupid ectopus he’s convinced is on ecto-dejecto or ghost steriods kept coming back.

It was to the point Boxy was concerned and ‘guarding his sleep’ (in exchange for origami boxes/cubes. He even made some for Lunch Box).

Danny decided to conk out during one of Lancer’s lessons after another attack the nogjt before.

He’s pretty sure Tapas/Taco is being restrained by his parents in an ecto-proofed tank.

Ancients he hopes so.

Lancer called him back after class, with that stupid ‘i know you are better than this and that accident does not excuse such poor behavior young man’ attitude most of the staff had toward him.

The actual lunch ladies were chill, and therefore his favorite. And Lunch Lady since she took to packing him an extra lunch that Boxy drops off. Something about fighting your food to eat it daily being ‘unacceptable!’

Whatever.

“Mr. Fenton, I understand that you are facing more challenges than your peers, but do try to stay awake in my class.”

“Got it. Blame Tapas.”

“You can’t blame mexican food for all your issues.”

“I don’t—Tapas is the ectopus that’s been obsessed with me and Phantom since the stupid thing showed up. It keeps escaping the Thermos, and i honestly have no clue how to keep him contained long enough to throw it at ecto animal control or ghost jail.”

“… Mr. Fenton, have you considered staying with relatives away from Amity until this issue is resolved?”

“I literally can’t.” His core sank at the idea. “Ecto contaminated and dependent. Medically speaking, until portable ecto is something that can be handled over long distances, I can’t leave for more than a hundred days, give or take, before dying.” No matter how much he wanted to at times.

Mr. Lancer frowned at him. “If possible, would mixed in-person and online schooling be something you’d be amenable to? I can speak with your parents and arrange alternative student success plan, but its clear the situation won’t improve unless better accommodations are put in place.”

Danny opened and shut his mouth. “If I can get them here, sure.”

“Excellent. I would like to continue your classes with myself in person to better monitor your progress, or we can do tutoring after school or during my usual block for Saturday detentions.”

Danny nodded in a daze.

Then something crashed in through the window.

“Adventures of Tom Sawyer!”

Danny threw himself against a wall, trying to get Taco off him, only to get pulled through a wall, and further.

Hey tried scrambling for something to grab, but he phased through everything and he couldn’t go ghost in front of everyone seeing him get kidnapped by an extra annoying octopus.

The fact it was being filmed made it Worse.

Fuck.

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[kikyoupdates]

Bloodthirst ⭑˚💋⭑ 𝑎 𝑤𝑎𝑟𝑚 ℎ𝑜𝑚𝑒

bnha x vampire!reader

reverse harem, my hero academia x fem!reader, my vampire!reader, slowburn

As punishment for your sins, you, a young vampire, are banished — not just from your home, but to a different world entirely. Now, you find yourself in a foreign place where Quirks and heroes are the norm. In addition to coming to terms with your new life, you must also face your greatest challenge: controlling your massive thirst for blood.

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“Only a bit more. My house is that one, just up ahead.”  

Izuku smiled awkwardly, eventually stopping in front of the house he’d been pointing to. So, this was where he lived. And for the time being, it was also going to be where you lived.

It was certainly much smaller than you were used to, that was for sure. Then again, you’d grown up in a literal castle, which wasn’t the norm. And it wasn’t like you could afford to be picky. Izuku had already saved your life once and even offered you refuge. The debt you owed him was nothing short of massive. 

You walked up to the front door, but Izuku hastily pulled you back by the arm. “W-Wait!” he spluttered. “I just, um... I-I need a few moments. To prepare myself...”  

“For what?” you asked, giving him a quizzical look.  

“Well...” He glanced around, looking everywhere but in your eyes. “I’ve never had a g-girl over before. It’s just me and my mom, so I’m sure she might have some questions. Actually, I don’t bring anyone over, not just girls. I don’t really have any friends...”  

Your jaw dropped open. How could that possibly be? He was the sweetest person you’d ever met. There was no way someone wouldn’t want to be his friend.

“Are you joking?” you frowned.  

Izuku shrunk in on himself. “I-I really wish I was.”  

“Gosh!” you fumed, squaring your hands on your hips. “What’s the matter with this world? You deserve tens of friends—no, hundreds of them! Clearly, the people who’ve met you must be a bunch of idiots.”

“T-There’s no need to go that far,” he protested. “It’s probably because I’m so plain and boring. I don’t blame them for not wanting to talk to me. The only thing I can really work up the nerve to bring is up heroes, and then I start rambling, and everyone gets annoyed because I won’t shut up...”  

“Stupid idiots. They’re not even giving you a chance.”

Izuku let out a nervous chuckle, then cleared his throat. “Well... that’s beside the point. Anyways, I guess we can’t stall for much longer. Are you ready? D-Don't be nervous. My mom is really nice to everyone, and you’re nice too, so I’m sure you’ll get along.” 

“Okay!” you beamed. “I’m ready.”  

After a brief pause, Izuku used his key to unlock the door, then opened it up. “Come in,” he said shyly, stepping aside to give you room.  

You glanced around. It was a cute, homely place. Again, very much different from what you were used to, but it wasn’t stuffy like the castle you’d grown up in. Even though you were nothing more than a stranger here, somehow, it felt comfortable. Warm.  

“Your home is beautiful,” you smiled.  

Izuku blushed. “M-My mom does her best to keep things looking nice. Actually, I should help out with the chores more often. I feel bad that she does so much of the work herself.”  

Speaking of, you could hear some movement coming from further inside. There was also a fragrant aroma wafting through the air. It smelled like someone was cooking.  

“Izuku?” came the gentle, feminine voice. “Are you home?”  

Hardly five seconds later, a kind-looking woman turned the corner and greeted you in the hallway. She was pretty much a carbon copy of Izuku, with her big green eyes and dark green hair, which was pulled into a half-up style. Her smile was friendly too, just like Izuku’s. The only thing she was missing was the sprinkling of freckles that dusted the boy’s cheeks.  

You could tell that Izuku hadn’t been lying to you. She certainly gave off the impression of being gentle and welcoming, and this was just from looking at her. She smelled sweet as well, just like Izuku did. At first, she was smiling, probably eager to greet her son, but that smile faded a bit when her gaze fell onto you.  

And then her eyes widened.  

“W-Who is this?” she blinked repeatedly. 

Izuku parted his lips to answer, but you were quicker on the uptake. “I’m [Name], Izuku’s friend!” you grinned. “It’s very nice to meet you!”

“Oh my!” Her eyes somehow went even wider, and then her smile was back, much brighter than before. “It’s been so long since you’ve had a friend over, Izuku! The last time must have been back when you and Katsuki were still kids!”  

“Mom, please,” Izuku groaned.

“Sorry, sorry! I’m Midoriya Inko,” she introduced, even bowing a bit. “It’s lovely to have you here, [Name]. I’m just making some food right now. It should be ready soon if you’d like to have some. Is there anything else I can get you in the meantime?”  

“She’s fine, mom,” Izuku sighed. He was red as a beet again. You’d quickly come to the conclusion that it wasn’t very difficult to make him blush, which you found awfully endearing.  

Inko kept on smiling happily. “Okay! Then, I’ll leave you two be.”  

That was what she said, but right before she turned to head back to the kitchen, her gaze shifted slightly, and she finally seemed to take note of the injury on your shoulder.  

“[N-Name]!” she gasped, rushing towards you right away. “You’re hurt! Oh no... how long ago did this happen? Izuku! Help me get out the first aid, quick!”  

Oh. Right.  

To be honest, you’d totally forgotten about that. After drinking Izuku’s blood, all of your strength had returned. You could hardly even feel the gash you’d acquired earlier. It was probably already healing up, anyways.  

“This is no big deal,” you reassured, smiling for good measure. “I fell a little while ago and got kind of scraped up. It looks worse than it is, I promise.” 

“Still! You need to clean the wound and bandage it up so it doesn’t get infected!”  

“That’s okay. I can do it myself. But I appreciate the concern.”  

Clearly, worrying seemed to run in the family. She was just as frantic as Izuku had been when he’d first noticed you were hurt. Thankfully, Izuku stepped in before his mom could work herself up into a full-blown panic attack.  

“I’ll help [Name] treat her injury,” he insisted. “But, um... there was actually something I wanted to ask you, mom. Would it be okay... if she stayed with us for a little while?”  

“Stayed with us?” Inko blinked. “As in...”  

“Like, overnight and stuff. For a few days. Maybe? Please?”  

Inko’s initial excitement was steadily turning to horror. You supposed that as a parent, having your kid suddenly bring over a complete stranger and ask to welcome your home up to them was a lot to take in. 

She leaned closer to Izuku and lowered her voice, although you could still hear her. Your senses were a lot sharper than a human’s, after all. 

“I-Izuku. Is she... your girlfriend or something? I didn’t even know you had one...”  

“Girlfriend?!” Izuku squeaked, looking just about ready to pass out. “N-No! It’s nothing like that! She just needs a place to stay for a little while, so I’d like to do her a favor, that’s all!”  

“My parents kicked me out of the house,” you added—perhaps a bit too chipperly, at that.  

Inko looked even more horrified now. “What?! But... you’re so young! That’s so irresponsible of them! They can’t leave a child all on her own! Police... I need to call the police! This is obvious neglect!”  

Calling the police wouldn’t fix your problems. If anything, it would only cause more of them, especially once they found out that you had no background information whatsoever. Drawing that much suspicion wasn’t something you wanted to deal with.  

“Mom, please don’t do that!” Izuku pleaded. “[Name] has a complicated relationship with her parents. L-Let's just try to be understanding... okay? You’re an adult, so she’ll be fine as long as you’re here to supervise her. Right? She’ll be safe here. Please?” 

Inko was nibbling on her bottom lip. “I suppose everyone has different family dynamics... but still. I can’t help but be worried.” She glanced over at you, brows creasing. “[Name], honey, are you safe? You didn’t get that injury from your parents... did you?” 

She was suspecting abuse, which was fair enough. It was a valid concern.  

“No, this was seriously an accident,” you reassured. “My parents don’t hit me.” You remembered the way your mother had slapped you across the face, but that was done in order to prevent you from quite literally killing someone, so you figured it was an exception.  

“[Name] has a lot going on already,” Izuku said, making puppy eyes and everything. “Her family just needs a bit of time to calm down. I want to help her.”

“Well... alright,” Inko eventually sighed out.  

Hooray! 

“Izuku was right,” you beamed. “You are super nice. Thank you so much for opening up your home to me. I promise to repay you somehow. I can’t even express how appreciative I am.”  

Inko chuckled softly. “I’m more than happy to help. I just want to make sure you’re safe, that’s all. But you seem like an honest, well-spoken girl, and it’s the first time in a long while Izuku has been so close to someone. Just promise you’ll tell me if your parents are crossing the line. Your wellbeing should always come first, okay?”  

Your parents had already more than crossed the line, what with banishing you to a different world altogether, but for now, she was probably better off not knowing that. Perhaps eventually, you’d reveal your secret to her as well. You couldn’t be certain that she’d believe you the way Izuku did, but you were choosing to remain optimistic.  

“Thanks so much, mom.” Izuku smiled, then wrapped his mother in a hug. He pulled away quickly enough, looking back at you sheepishly. “Right... the first aid kit. I’m just going to go help [Name] clean out her cut, alright? We’ll come back later once the food is ready.”  

“Alright, sweetie. You two have fun.” Inko paused once last time to look you over. “But... if you’re going to be staying the night, don’t you have a bag with some belongings and pajamas? It doesn’t look like you’ve brought anything.”  

“My parents kicked me out before I could collect my things,” you replied.  

The poor thing looked she was about to cry. You’d probably stressed her out so much she was on the verge of collapsing.  

“I-I’ll find some old clothes of mine for you to wear, from back when I was younger,” she said tiredly.  

“That sounds great!”

Having officially received approval to stay here for a little while, it felt like a weight had been lifted off your chest. Izuku seemed quite giddy about the fact as well, if his broad smile was any indication. He quickly rummaged through one of the cabinets, pulled out a little box, which you assumed was the first aid kit, then pointed you down the hall.  

“My room’s that way,” he said. “Ah, but—!”  

Too late. You’d entered the room before he had a chance to finish his train of thought, and... it was certainly much more impactful than you’d been expecting. It was completely decked out, with posters and what appeared to be countless figurines as far as the eye could see. The colors were rather vibrant, you noted, and if you weren’t mistaken, almost all of the items had the same theme.  

“Who’s this guy?” you asked, picking up one of the figurines to get a closer look.  

“C-Careful!” Izuku yelped. He was practically pulling at his hair while you held the figurine, and sweating bullets, to boot.  

You carefully set the figurine down and chuckled sheepishly. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have just gone around touching things without asking. It seems like this stuff is important to you. But I keep seeing this same guy everywhere I look. Who is he?”  

“Oh,” Izuku blinked. “Right. You’re not from here, so you wouldn’t know. That’s All Might. He’s the Number One hero, and I’m pretty much his biggest fan. It’s a little embarrassing to say out loud... but he’s kind of my role model. I want to be just like him when I grow up.”  

“He’s one of those heroes you mentioned before?”  

“Yeah! He’s the strongest hero in the whole world!”  

Izuku’s exuberant smile was back. This topic certainly seemed to make him excited, although you supposed the concept of heroes was pretty cool. You didn’t really have anything like that back home. A bunch of different intelligent species, sure, but you’d never once come across someone with that sort of title.  

“So, heroes are people that save others, right?” you clarified.  

“Mhm!” Izuku nodded. “They put their lives on the line to fight off villains or rescue people from natural disasters. They’re just incredible! Since I was little, I always knew I wanted to become one of them, no matter what. But...”  

Suddenly, his expression dropped. 

“It’s going to be harder for me than for most people,” he begrudgingly admitted. “Because I don’t have a Quirk.”  

You frowned. “What’s a Quirk?”  

“They’re like powers,” he explained. “Humans didn’t used to have special powers before, but at some point, a mutation allowed us to change and develop over time. Now that several generations have passed, it’s rarer to not have a Quirk then it is to have one. The reason heroes are so strong and cool is because they have all sorts of different powers. But me... I’m just Quirkless. It makes me weaker than most, so I know it’ll be a challenge if I want to turn my dream into reality.”  

Interesting. The more you found out about this world, the more intrigued you were.  

“The humans here appear to be stronger than the ones in my world,” you hummed. “That explains why that criminal—er, villain I ran into was able to actually hurt me. His nails transformed into knives right in front of my eyes. That must’ve been his power. His Quirk. Right?”

Izuku nodded. “Yeah. There are all kinds of Quirks out there. Some of them allow you to change your body briefly, like how that guy did. Some of them allow you to create things out of nothing or even shoot lasers and stuff. And some of them permanently alter the way you look, and you can’t turn them off even if you want to.”  

Ah. That explains why so many of the people I saw didn’t look like, well...  people . 

“Put simply, they’re amazing,” Izuku chuckled, looking more dejected by the second. “I really wish I had one. It would make everything so much easier...”

“Maybe you’ll get yours one day,” you encouraged. 

“Ah... it doesn’t really work that way. By the age of four, your Quirk has to have manifested, and there are no exceptions. I know this because my mom and I even consulted a doctor back when I was a kid. He told me there was no hope.”  

His head drooped after that last comment, which had your heart clenching uncomfortably. What awful luck. He wanted to be a hero, and you could clearly tell that he was passionate about saving people after everything he’d done for you, but fate had been cruel to him.  

Back where you were from, strength varied quite significantly depending on the species. Vampires were notoriously strong—one of the very strongest, as a matter of fact. Oftentimes, this strength came in handy, since it could be used to settle disputes over land or end wars. Thankfully, you hadn’t lived through any wars in your lifetime, but you’d heard from your grandparents that things used to be quite rough a while back. Strength was a means to an end, and it made countless things easier to obtain.

Unfortunately, this seemed to be the case here as well.  

A bit hesitant, you couldn’t help but ask, “Do you need a Quirk to become a hero?”  

Izuku seemed taken aback by your question. You hoped you hadn’t come across as insensitive. It was just that he was yearning to be a hero so bad, you couldn’t help but wish there was some way that he actually could.  

“Technically... no,” Izuku breathed, a wobbly smile rising to his lips. “And even though I’m sure my case is unusual, I don’t plan on giving up. I’m going to become a hero, no matter what it takes. I’ll work as hard as I have to.”  

You clapped your hands. “Wow! That’s so admirable! You’re super cool, Izuku! That’s right. There’s no reason to give up before you’ve even tried, right?”  

“Y-Yeah. I feel the same way. Thank you for being so supportive.” He blushed a bit, then cleared his throat. “Um... anyways. W-We should clean up your wound now that we have a chance. My mom’s right. It’d be bad if it got infected.”  

“Oh, there’s really no need for that.”  

“We have to! I wouldn’t want you to start feeling unwell again,” he added, looking concerned.  

It was hard to say no to that face.  

“Well... alright,” you shrugged. You didn’t even bother being gracious about it; you grabbed onto the fabric of your dress sleeve and fully ripped it apart, exposing the bloody gash on your shoulder.  

Izuku flinched before opening up the first aid kit. “Yikes. T-That looks like it hurts a lot. How have you been coping with something like that?”  

“Honestly, I can hardly even feel it anymore,” you admitted. “After I drank your blood, I went right back to normal.”  

“But still. Hold on a second. I’m going to wipe the cut down, then maybe disinfect it a bit.”  

He used a bit of water to wet a cloth, then gave you a reassuring smile before carefully patting your injury to soak up the blood. You didn’t wince a single time, because you really didn’t feel any lingering pain. His blood had done a great job of fixing you up.

Izuku’s amazing, in more ways than one. Normally I have to consume a lot more blood to recover as quickly as I did. We might just be especially compatible.  

Clearly, running into him had been no mere stroke of luck. There must have been some higher power guiding you. Fate, or something like that.  

“Huh?”

Amidst your daydreaming, Izuku let out a confused gasp, so you turned towards him with a frown. “What’s wrong?” you asked. “Sorry. It’s probably a bit gross having to clean my wound up. We’re pretty much strangers, after all.”  

“N-No, it’s not that. It’s just...” He swallowed thickly. “I can’t... see a cut. There was all that blood, but it doesn’t look like there’s a cut anywhere to be found.”

“Oh.” 

“That’s all you’re going to say?!”  

You laughed. “Like I said, there was really no need to bother with any of this. I heal quick. Vampires have much stronger constitutions than humans. We’re stronger physically, we have sharper senses, and we heal faster too. Though it looks like I healed up perfectly even faster than I was expecting. It must be because your blood is so amazing, Izuku!”  

“I-Incredible,” was all he could manage to say in return. You supposed from his standpoint, it was pretty awesome. You hated to admit it, but you couldn’t help but feel a bit smug as you proudly stuck up your nose towards the ceiling.  

“Even for a vampire, I’m really strong,” you said boastfully. “I’m the strongest out of my entire family. My parents told me I’m even stronger than they were at my age.” 

Now, if only I could get my blood-drinking habits under control... 

“So cool,” Izuku marveled. “It’s not a Quirk... but if it was, it would definitely be one of the strongest ones out there. [Name], you’re just awesome. It kind of makes me feel even more lame by comparison... haha.” 

“Don’t say that,” you chided. “I would’ve been a goner if not for you. And like I said earlier, you were so brave, just letting me suck your blood without question. You’re awesome too, Izuku. You’re probably even more awesome than I am.”  

“You’re exaggerating,” he said sheepishly, but his awkward smile told you he was happy to be receiving your praise.  

You crossed your legs and leaned back on your palms. “Well, I’m expected to be strong. My power is the whole reason my parents were considering naming me their heir, even though I’m not the oldest of my siblings. But after how bad I screwed up, that’s definitely not going to be happening anymore...”  

“Heir?” Izuku blinked. “Were you supposed to inherit their company or something?”  

“No, their throne.” 

Izuku went dead silent for a while.  

“...their what?” he eventually gaped.  

“Oh. Didn’t I mention this already? My parents are the king and queen of our land. I’m technically a princess by blood.”  

“P-Princess?!” he practically exploded, leaping halfway across the room. His big eyes proceeded to scour his surroundings, and his palms flew up to his face in horror. “Oh my god! I brought you back to my modest house without even knowing that! This place must look like a dumpster compared to what you’re used to! W-What do I even call you? Your Highness? Princess [Name]?!” 

“Just [Name] is fine,” you mused. “Your reaction is so funny. Nothing’s changed. I’m still the same person. Besides, I was kicked out by my family, so I probably shouldn’t even call myself royalty anymore. It’s just how I was raised, that’s all.”  

Izuku let out a heavy sigh. “Just when I thought I’d heard it all, you find new ways to surprise me...”  

“Haha. Sorry about that.” 

“No, I’m probably just being overdramatic. Anyways, um...” He seemed to be averting your gaze for some reason, and once again, his cheeks were flushed bright red. You noticed his eyes occasionally wandering towards your arm and shoulder, both of which were completely bare. “I-I should’ve brought you a change of clothes first before trying to clean your wound. You’ll get cold like that. Let me go talk to my mom real quick, and we’ll see what she has for you to wear. And maybe tomorrow, we can go shopping for some new clothes?”  

“Okay!” you chirped. “That would be great. Thank you so much.”  

“It’s no problem,” he smiled back, hastily exiting the room.  

Once you were left alone, you stood up and began pacing around again, just taking everything in. Then, you spotted it. One of those handheld devices that everyone had been walking around with earlier—the one that lit up and had tiny little people trapped inside of it.

“What kind of sorcery is this?” you huffed, leaning closer to get a better look. The screen was completely blank, for some reason. Was this one broken? But what use would a broken device be? You knew you shouldn’t go poking around Izuku’s things again, so for the time being, you just kept on staring at it, very much on guard.  

Out of nowhere, the device started vibrating, and you nearly crapped yourself from the fright.  

“Holy fuck!”

Needless to say, Izuku came running back into the room a second later. “[Name]!” he cried out. “What’s wrong? Did you hurt yourself?”  

“Y-Your device,” you pointed, shaking like a leaf in the wind. “I think it might be possessed.”  

Izuku furrowed his brows. “Um. You mean my cellphone?”  

“I’ve never heard that term before. What does it mean?”  

“Oh boy,” he sighed. “It seems like I’ve got a lot more to explain...”  

Yesterday had been a lot of fun. Well, glossing over the fact that you’d been abandoned by your family and whatnot.  

Still, you were extremely thankful to have met Izuku. You had a good feeling about him. At the risk of sounding a bit full of yourself, it felt like you belonged by his side. Last night, Inko had given you some clothes to lounge around in as a temporary measure. You’d eaten dinner together, and you didn’t miss the way Izuku had been looking at you in bewilderment from across the table. You’d later explained that just because you needed to consume blood didn’t mean that you didn’t consume other food as well. 

You’d slept in the guest room, although you’d initially been quite giddy about sharing a room with Izuku. But he nearly exploded when you suggested doing such a thing, so for the sake of his poor heart, you decided it was best to sleep apart.  

And now, it was the next day. Izuku had apparently been in his school uniform when you’d encountered him, but he was off from classes today, which gave him time to take you shopping. You were excited to see more of this world and all the novelties it had to offer.

Currently, you were heading towards what Izuku had called a ‘shopping district’.  

“There are all sorts of stores there,” he explained. “Hopefully you’ll be able to find some clothes you like. My mom’s stuff is okay, but it’s not super stylish... and I’m sure you’d like to pick out something that fits you better.”  

It was true. Inko’s old clothes were comfortable, but they certainly weren’t a perfect fit for your body.  

Besides, shopping with Izuku sounded fun. From what else he’d told you, there were places to try out different kinds of food too, and plenty of other things to do as recreation. Given the life you’d lived, nearly all of your clothing had come as a result of fittings and were tailor-made. They were beautiful, there was no doubt about it, but you couldn’t say you had much experience picking them out for yourself, since your servants and family were usually involved in the whole process.  

All of this was so new to you. Hey, maybe being banished wasn’t such a bad thing after all. You were trying to look on the bright side.  

“Shopping mall, shopping mall,” you hummed happily, practically skipping as you made your way towards the destination.  

Regretfully, you never actually made it to the shopping mall.  

“Huh? Is that shitty Deku I see? What the... he’s got a chick with him.”  

The source of the remark was a teenage boy with spiky ash blonde hair, narrowed crimson eyes, and a husky voice. There were two other guys with him, and they were snickering for some reason.  

“Deku?” you frowned. “No, you got his name wrong. It’s actually Izuku.”  

“[N-Name]!” Izuku hissed into your ear. He was even jabbing his elbow into your ribs, having broken out into a cold sweat. “That’s his nickname for me! Don’t question it, let’s just go!”  

“Nickname? Oh, so you must be friends! Hello, Izuku’s friend,” you beamed, waving towards the blonde guy.  

It wasn’t until after you’d already said the words that you remembered what Izuku had mentioned before, about not having any friends. 

You realized this as you watched the blonde guy’s expression turn to rage.  

“Friends?” he glowered. “Did you just call me and that piece of shit friends? Are you fucking kidding me right now?”  

“Oh. I guess I was wrong,” you blinked. Izuku had stopped jabbing you in the ribs, but it was only because he’d gone completely stiff. You were starting to put two and two together.

Izuku didn’t like this guy. This guy was bad news.  

“Hey, Deku,” blondie grimaced. “Who is this bitch? Don’t tell me you actually nabbed yourself a girlfriend. Nah, there’s no way. What lies did you tell her to somehow convince her into hanging out with your sorry ass?”  

“K-Kacchan,” Izuku swallowed, taking several steps back. He motioned for you to do the same, but now it was your turn to go still. And it was for a different reason entirely. 

Your gaze turned icy. “Why do you keep speaking about Izuku that way? It’s a crappy thing to do, so please stop it. He’s a really nice guy. Take it back.”

The boy—Kacchan, or whatever his name was—seemed to be getting angrier by the second.  

“Ha,” he chuckled humorlessly. “Would you look at that? This bitch actually has a backbone. Okay, then. Try me. I’ll kick your ass,” he seethed, already cracking his knuckles for good measure.  

“Not unless I kick yours first,” you answered sweetly.

“The fuck did you just—”  

Before he could even process what was happening, you had already rushed towards him and landed a punch square to his jaw. It knocked him back, most likely because he’d been unprepared, but not all the way to the ground, even though you were quite confident that you’d used enough force.  

He then swiped a hand across his lip, eyes nothing short of murderous.  

“Alright. That’s it. You’re fucking dead.”

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[carmyberzattosjournal]

S2 Entry 2: Soothe the Goosebumps

Image credit: @neverscreens

Summary: Carmy’s girlfriend (who he calls Darling) soothes him down from an impending panic attack with apple cubes. (1346 Words) FLUFF.

Warnings: Swearing, hurt, comfort, fem reader/lass who is a trauma surgeon, she/her pronouns, finger sucking (light), impending panic attack (panic attack doesn’t happen), praise kink, feeding kink?, subby!Carmy. Mentions of Donna Berzatto.

Notes: Thank you for reading and sharing! This is a work in CB Journals Season 2 and will be tagged with #cb journals s2.

Sideblog for commentary and social stuff: @m-z-shoroi

Prompt: String Lights

“Do you not decorate for Christmas?” she asked. “Not even string lights or a mini tree?”

No. Fuck Christmas.

The silence, and the subsequent recoil evident on her face when I looked up from the apple I was dicing, is what told me I’d said that aloud. My stomach flipped. Hands abruptly turned cold for some reason. Heat flooded into my face.

I can’t even begin to explain to you the biblical level of shit I was in that week. That whole month, honestly. The review didn’t go well—we weren’t given our star, which meant that not only did all my bullshit that I pulled in the restaurant after having that mental fucking breakdown after the walk-in incident severely strain all my interpersonal relationships, it also did fuck all to give us any sort of results. If we’d gotten the star, then maybe, maybe, it would’ve stung just a little less. The wounds haven’t gone away—the repeated flare-ups of fighting between Sugar, Richie, Syd, and me are evidence of that—but the star would’ve been salve on the cuts. Maybe taken away some of the burn. No, it just redoubled everyone’s rage at me (including my own. I was getting dangerously close to hating myself more than I hate the fucking Devil at this point). So, the burst of fighting at the top of November turned into all-out war for the rest of the month. We’d found something of a balance before—minus the flare-ups—where I’d do a new menu every month using seasonal ingredients. I’d be mindful of what the kitchen staff could do, Syd and I would actually properly collaborate on them, so she didn’t feel voiceless (even if working with another person drove me fucking insane sometimes), and Richie and I would, generally, as much as we both could corral our familial trauma, try to stay out of each other’s way. Sometimes even get along a bit.

“Carmy?”

Now? Now I lost all fucking control of my restaurant. Syd and I were battling over the menu because even when accounting for her notes, she wanted to scrap whatever I did. Richie was so far out of my grasp that Sugar maintained a demilitarized zone between us, acting as the Secretary of State—or I don’t know, a fucking messenger pigeon—bringing things back and forth, all while trying not to (and failing on multiple occasions) explode at either of us for our bullshit. And it was bullshit. We’re fucking adults, I keep trying to act like a fucking adult and get a handle on myself so this doesn’t fucking happen again—I’m in therapy, for fuck’s sake!—and yet Richie and Syd insist on being fucking children about it.

In retrospect, I don’t blame Syd. If your coworker spiraled off the fucking deep end, and all you got out of that was the trauma of surviving that spiral, would you even want to fucking look at them again? She worked her ass off to make The Bear what it is, she put stock in her own identity as a chef, and wants, more than anything, to be able to take pride in her work.

I said I wouldn’t stand by and let her do to herself what I did to me, right?

Am I not her Devil?

So here we are, December three days away, still without a fucking menu.

“Baby? Sweetheart? Hey.”

Shit. Shit. Fuck. I dropped the knife onto the cutting board. “S-sorry. Sorry, I-I should explain—”

“I just wasn’t expecting such a strong reaction.” She held her hands up, palms out towards me. “It’s okay. It just caught me by surprise is all.”

“Christmas-Christmas is fucking traumatizing.” Why did it come out like a question? It’s a fact. It was fucking traumatizing. I closed my eyes, trying to retreat to the quiet dark, where it’s stable, where it’s safe. “My-my mom, she would, uh, she would do this-this big feast. Seven Fishes... And it was-it was always such a fucking disaster. And-and she would always explode at the tiniest thing. I-I hate fucking Christmas and New Years a-a-and-and fucking birthdays. Fuck birthdays.”

Something burned in my chest. A deep sort of fiery sting that took me two heartbeats to recognize as stomach acid bubbling into my esophagus. I grasped at the pain as if I could somehow get ahold of it and remove it from me, could toss it away like a wet paper towel, but all I found was the front of my apron.

“Hey, hey, you’re okay.” Oh no, Darling sounded worried. I fucking hate when I worry her. I pried my eyes open and found her expression contorted in concern, eyebrows scrunched together, corners of her mouth turned down. “What’s wrong? Pain? Nausea?”

I tried talking, but I couldn’t produce sound past the hot iron burning my insides. Blindly reached for the quart of water and chugged a few sips down. It provided some relief initially, but the flames came right back.

“Hold on.” She rifled around the cabinet above my head and pried off the lid of the baking soda container. Put two pinches in the quart. Swirled it. “It’ll taste weird, but it should help.”

Metallic. Metallic, bitter, kind of salty? Like I licked a dirty penny or something. Weird doesn’t sum it up, it’s fucking disgusting. She rubbed up and down my sternum as I gulped this vile concoction down.

“It’s a base, it’ll help neutralize the acid,” she explained. “Just take little sips until the burning stops.” I’m sure she knew I understood the logic, but I appreciated her talking to me anyway. It was comforting. Something to focus on. Something to drown out the memories of ma’s yelling bubbling away in the back of my head.

Goosebumps exploded on my arms when I took another gulp of the baking soda water. It just kept getting worse. Now the weird taste was lingering on my tongue well after the water was gone, but my chest still burned like a brand was on it. Darling rubbed her hands up and down my forearm, trying to soothe the goosebumps away.

“I’m-I’m sorry,” she mumbled.

I responded too slowly. “You didn’t do anything wrong.” Not even giving me this horrible shit; it was helping the heartburn.

“No, about the whole…” she gestured in a wide circle. Ah. About Christmas and shit. Got it. “It’s gotta be tough. With. How much those things are engrained in society and all.”

I shrugged a shoulder. Grimaced and got another wave of chills on the next sip of baking soda water. She picked up an apple cube and pressed it to my lips. It wasn’t meant to be an intimate gesture—I’m getting better at reading her face and knowing what the intention behind anything she does is—but something deep in my core tightened and warmed when she fed me the morsel of apple, when the tip of her finger rested just a second too long on my lips. I must’ve had a certain look on my face because she made the cute little cooing sound that meant she figured something out. Cupped my face with her other hand. Stroked my cheek.

“That better, pretty boy?”

She brought another apple cube to my lips, kept her eyes locked on mine—this piercing gaze halfway between interrogative and fascinated, like she was a cat observing a new toy, trying to figure out how to pounce on it. My navel flooded with heat, dick twitched in my sweats. Half of me wanted to shrink in place, become tiny and insignificant, small enough to fit in her pocket like a pathetic but endearing pet. The other half of me got lost in her eyes, in those shimmering river stones, in the perfect architecture of her eyelashes, as if admiring a fine work in some pretentious fucking museum somewhere. She let me suck the tip of her thumb clean. Dragged it slowly over my tongue.

I nodded. Yes. Yes, it’s better.

The fuck was I even stressing about before?

Tags: @carmenberzattosgf @jess248 @catharticconsolation @persymons @morgthemagpie @glitch0o0 @nox-is-thename @forgechildofheph @leminjelly @fridavacado @lumoslemon @cyarskj1899

[proposalanonaita]

FINE.

The date is fast approaching (seven and a half weeks left), I've had sufficient quantities of Malbec, and I'm realizing that whoever suggested that writing my vows would be MUCH more harrowing than talking about my feelings to internet nobodies.....had a fair point; I should at least attempt to put it all to words before I write the real drafts.

Ugh.

I should probably start by stating that I'm WELL aware of who I am. Rest assured, I know that I'm stunningly abrasive. And controlling. And petty, conniving, misanthropic, or whatever other adjectives you've been calling me in the tags (yes, I DID read those, and it IS weird of so many of you to be calling for my divorce. I thought you were supposed to be nicer than I am?).

All this to say, I've always been cognizant of being an acquired taste. Partly because I've always BEEN an acquired taste. I tone it down in public, and in most of my personal relationships, but I am, down to my core, a Mean Mother Fucker.

With partners before my fiancé, I had to make myself more palatable to stay together. The men I dated were FAR too nice, and snipping with them at all felt like I was a heavyweight champion facing off against a toddler. So I reigned it in. It worked, but no matter how well things were going on paper, I didn't feel like I was myself with any of them.

I was even less myself with The Shithead. I'm NOT getting into the entirety of that particular tire fire here, you little freaks already know FAR too much about me and I won't have you tagging the gory details of the worst part of my life with #bob the builder/fuzzy wuzzy or whatever you're into.

He was horrible to me, I turned dangerously timid, I'm lucky I had enough Mean left in me to get the fuck out. He's changed enough by now that I considered inviting him to the wedding, it was bad enough back then I'm very glad I didn't. Enough said.

...I'm talking quite a bit up here because I still hate having to say any of the next part. Call me an emotionless villain for that if you want to, I am far too employed and 30 to care very much.

Ugh, ugh, ugh.

So.

The thing is, there are people that KNOW me, and there are people who LIKE me. My parents know me, and I've never doubted they love me, but that's not LIKING me as a person. That's a contractual obligation of birthing me. My friends like me, some even like me when I'm catty, but I need to be careful to hold myself back, at the risk of losing them. At best, people loved "me", not ME.

For decades, this was just the way the world was. It was a fact of life- The sky is blue, I'm secretly unlovable, the Earth goes around the sun.

And then, against all odds, I found my fiancé, who manages to do both.

He sees ALL of me. Every square inch, every fleeting thought, every horrible little quirk of my rotten personality. And THEN, as if that weren't bad enough, he turns around and ENJOYS it all. He's not just tolerant of my least palatable traits, he's delighted. The more I show him, the more he likes.

It's awful. I'd say he stole my heart, but that sounds too pleasant. It's more like my heart is a cockroach he could squish at any moment, and I trust him not to, and I'm just supposed to wake up every morning and do the dishes and go to work as if this doesn't mean we're clearly orbiting Saturn. The sky is PURPLE now. What the fuck.

He could at least do me the favor of being completely, 100% perfect, because then I could blame his total lapse in judgement on that, but NO. He's a BASTARD.

I'm engaged to a big sweaty idiot who annoys me on purpose. He's terrible with his money. He tries to take me on HIKES, and JOGS, and CAMPING TRIPS. His taste in every single art form known to man is GARBAGE, he's constantly leaving his dirty socks on the floor, and he's such a bad driver I'm amazed he still has a license.

I've told him all of that to his face, and I've MEANT it, and he's just called me a bitch and asked me what I want for dinner. He knows that I'm unlovable, agrees that all those parts of me are in here, and then loves me anyway.

He loves me. He LOVES me. He loves ME.

I don't know what I'm meant to do with it all, but there's clearly SOMETHING wrong with his brain, so I guess I'll have to keep him, if only for his sake.

[ender-cloud]

HYDE IS IN THIS UPDATE!!! AND LANYON MY KINGS

Tgs spoilers under cut

Haha, you guys remember that one off comment i made last week

Ha ha ha……. Oh god, I’ll get to that when I get to it. Lets start with more of Jaspers good points and leadership skills first

Jasper makes a great point here.

The Lodgers are the society! They make the magic, the energy, the environment, Jekyll is just the ring leader of it all making sure things don’t get to out of hand, but in the end he had started to have a hard time being able to find that control and keep them in check.

This is why a type of “revolution” like this will do more good then harm in this situation because it will allow Jasper to take Jekylls place of keeping everyone together as the times turn and they need to protect themselves.

But uh… maybe the lodgers might not see this as I do

Ok ok, I get the Lodgers hesitants, Fritz brought to my attention that because Jasper is the newest lodger, despite everything they probably dont have enough trust in him.

Which I definitely get, they are in hard times right now and its hard to trust Jasper, even if they’ve known him for a while they were just betrayed by someone they’ve known for years, how can they trust someone they’ve known for a little over a month (I think)

Also theres a reason why I said that one off comment, not only because it was a trope I see a lot, but because I truly felt like it was a possibility

BUTTTT!! With this it doesn’t necessarily mean that they wont 100% not follow through with what Jasper is saying.

It is clear that they are unsure, yes, but they may need to think it over, and theres got to be a few lodgers who agree with his points.

Some who agree with Jasper that may help the other Lodgers get on board to. If they are truly Reluctant to Jasper leading them because they haven’t known him for long, if some people who they have been living with for years joining up may give them the boost to join.

Jasper made many great points in his speech, and with so many people not everyone could have disagreed with what he said.

I believe this moment of doubt will be just that, a moment, but once other people start agreeing and maybe adding their own points, then it will grow into what Jasper wanted before, the lodgers believing him and letting him lead them in this hard time

It will be the next part of this turning point into someone more confident for Jasper, because while motivating the lodgers with words might be easy, actually forming a plan and leading them through it will be harder, it will also teach him to not give up quickly when things look bad.

Hyde’s just casually acting like he didn’t just have a mental breakdown and immediately just teases Lanyon (I love them so much chat it’s unreal)

ALSO THIS CONFIRMS THAT HYDES MENTAL BREAKDOWN WAS HAPPENING THE SAME TIME AS JASPERS SPEACH!!!

Anyway, back to the actual pannel.

I find it interesting how in Hydes head, he also has a reputation to keep up, its not just Jekyll. The only difference is that hyde has his tough guy, bad boy rep (I hate myself for saying that) He cant let anyone see his weakness, not even Jekyll.

He clearly has mentally trained himself to be able to just change his mood on a switch, but even if he can change how he acts his face has to show some evidence of what happened, i mean we’ve seen him be a little bloody from the glass and Lanyon must have seen that too.

He might be talking about what Hyde looks like when he said he made quite a mess out of himself, not only the glass, which might make Hyde nervous, i feel like he wont be able to keep his facade up for long with how he was acting before.

It’s a little hard delve into the few words they exchanged but im excited for the next update, which may include some blaming of what happened to Jekyll.

(Also more Lanyon and Hyde which I’ll take anyday 🙏🙏)

Happy Holidays Btw!! I hope you have a great Christmas or anything you may celebrate!!

[tkaulitzlvr]

Hiii can you please do a Tom Kaulitz smut where him and the reader have been friends for a long time and they just do it for pleasure and then maybe some feelings get involved 😉 TYSMMM 😘

MORE THAN THIS - T. KAULITZ

synopsis: you and tom have been friends with benefits for a while. but, you soon begin to realise that you have caught feelings, distancing yourself from him as a way to disguise them. it doesn’t take him long to realise this, and he is determined to find out why.

content: smut, angst and fluff all in one.

a/n: thank you for requesting, i hope you like it!

tom had been sending me suggestive glances the entire night from across the table, his eyes basically undressing me, scanning the way my figure looked in the small white dress i was wearing, leaving little to the imagination - not that he had to imagine anything anyways, he had seen it all before.

we weren’t dating, no. we were quite good friends actually - friends that fucked, all the time. i couldn’t remember when or how this thing had started, but once it began, it never stopped. at first, i enjoyed it, the sex far better than i had imagined, and i liked that it was just sex. but lately, i couldn’t ignore the nagging feeling that i wanted it to be more than that, more than a quick hookup when we were both horny, the convenience of it all meaning that tom came to me more and more, wanting the same thing each time. whenever he was inside me, whispering sweet nothings into my ears in the heat of the moment, my mind tricked me into thinking he actually meant it, causing me to fall deeper and deeper, my feelings now far beyond my control.

i had started to distance myself from him, which pissed me off a little, angry at myself for letting me catch feelings in the first place. we had a strong friendship, and i didn’t just miss the sex, i missed him. but, i had to put my sadness aside to try and get rid of these feelings, knowing that it would only end in upset, declining all of his offers to fuck these past few weeks. it didn’t take him long to grow suspicious, having never saying no to a quick hook up before. it was easy to reject his offers over text, but i knew that tonight, now that we were face to face, i wouldn’t be able to say no, our group of friends all at a random club bill had suggested. the fact that i hadn’t spoken to him all night confirmed that i was avoiding him, and judging by the way his eyes wouldn’t leave mine, it was obvious that he planned to get to the bottom of it.

i had missed tom. it was impossible to deny the way my heart ached when i saw him walk through the doors, secretly glad that he was here, silently screaming with excitement when bill had told me he was coming. it was strange to go from seeing someone all the time, fucking them basically everyday, to being lucky to see them once a week. but i had no one else to blame but myself, and the way i couldn’t pull away from his gaze, the sexual tension between us so thick it was almost visible, made it totally obvious that the distance i had forced between us didn’t work, my feelings for him still as strong as they were - if not stronger.

he looked good. i had always thought he was attractive, long before we had started hooking up. i couldn’t tell if it was the fact that i hadn’t seen him in so long, or the alcohol in my system, but tonight, he looked better than ever. his face was stern, jaw clenched and mouth shut, decorated with his usual black lip ring, eyes hooded as they stared into mine, filled with lust. his black braids resting on his shoulders, a black bandana tied on his forehead, dressed in all black, his baggy jeans almost falling from his figure - i wanted nothing more than to see what was underneath, craving him. and i could see that he wanted it too, shuffling every so often and adjusting his jeans.

he looks directly into my eyes, using his head to gesture towards the bathroom, knowing exactly what he was getting at. i quickly shake my head, wanting nothing more than to feel him inside me, but the more rational part of me reminds me that i should stay strong, hooking up with him in a random bathroom never a smart idea, especially when i am trying to get over him. he furrows his eyebrows, tilting his head to the side, repeating his motion and once again signalling towards the bathroom, knowing that i will give in eventually.

he stands up, clearing his throat, quietly muttering that he is going to the bathroom, sending a final glance in my direction before heading off. i wait a minute or so, not wanting to cause any suspicions, before adjusting my dress and standing up.

“i’m getting another drink, anybody want one?” i ask, watching everyone shake their head and mutter a small ‘no thanks’, silently glad that they have declined, knowing that they wouldn’t be getting that drink.

i turn around quickly, making sure that nobody is watching me, before pushing my way through the drunken crowds, until i reach the bathroom, pushing the heavy door open. it only takes a few seconds for me to be spun around and pressed against the wall, tom harshly connecting his lips to mine, locking the door whilst he does so. his hands knead the flesh of my thighs, pushing me into him repeatedly, grinding me against his clothed dick, lifting me up and hoisting me against the wall, all whilst his lips continue to work against mine.

he pulls away, only to attach his lips to my neck, planting rough and open mouthed kisses to my skin, ragged sighs escaping from my mouth, an aching feeling spreading through my inner thighs as my need for him only grows, any determination to resist him now lost as the only thing on my mind is getting him inside of me.

i feel him harden against me, confirming the need as totally mutual, tom wanting me as much as i do him. after all, he had asked to fuck multiple times, it was me that had declined lately. but he holds out, getting me a little more riled up, taking advantage of the way he has me under his control, his hands hungrily roaming my body, having not done this for so long, completely thanks to my stubbornness. his lips remain at my neck, leaving no part of it untouched, biting harshly at the skin before running his tongue over it, soothing the stinging pain that his teeth leave.

“so…” he trails off, continuing to attack my neck with his lips, sucking on the skin after, leaving marks as he clearly doesn’t care how rough he is being. “wanna explain why you’ve been ignoring me, hm?”

he sucks on my neck between each word, his tongue smoothing over the skin as he awaits my response, not slowing down his motions.

“i wasn’t ignoring you-” i breathe out, a small moan cutting off my speech as his lips hit my sweet spot, his mouth curving into a smirk against it once he hears my response.

“don’t lie to me.” he begins, moving my panties to the side and inserting one finger into me, watching my mouth fall open, a low whine emitting from my lips. “you’ve been avoiding me, why?”

he reiterates his question, staring directly into my eyes, waiting for me to respond. a satisfied smile rests on his face as he watches the way i try to speak, failing miserably once he adds another finger, curling them both slightly. he is satisfied with the way he messes with my mind, teasing me as my face contorts in pleasure, his eyes scanning my features, my mouth hung open, eyes squeezed shut.

“why do you care?” i moan out, feeling a knot begin to form in my stomach as he knows exactly how to get me there, his fingers curling in the right place, finding my g-spot and hitting it repeatedly, my walls instinctively clenching around them. he picks up on this, removing his fingers and staring into my eyes as he brings them to his mouth, licking the juices on them and smiling at my response. he removes them from his lips with a pop, dragging them down my own mouth as all i can do is watch him, the wetness between my thighs increasing as i know that i can’t handle being teased like this for much longer - becoming more frustrated than anything.

“changing the subject, hm? just tell me, why are you trying to stay away from me?” he asks, also clearly done with teasing me as he grabs his belt. my eyes fall to his hands, watching the veins in them flex as he roughly pulls the belt from the loops in his jeans, wanting nothing else than his fingers inside of me. he undoes the button of his jeans, letting them pool at his feet, not even bothering to fully take them off as his boxers soon follow.

his hands reach for the zipper of my dress as he pulls it downwards, letting the material fall to the ground, his tongue finding its way to his lip ring as he plays with it, scanning my body with eyes full of lust. he takes me in his arms, placing me on the counter, the coldness causing me to shiver a little. he messes with the hem of my panties, his fingers dipping in and out of them, eyes glued to mine as he watches me try to hold back small moans, before roughly pulling them down and throwing them on the floor somewhere. he spreads my legs with one hand, giving him space to move in between them, wasting no time in positioning himself at my entrance, his head moving to my breasts as he buries it into them, kissing and biting at the skin.

“maybe i didn’t want to see you.” i respond, lying through my teeth. i feel him smirk against me, a small laugh escaping from his lips as he pulls his head from my breasts, looking into my eyes and shaking his head, knowing that i am not telling the truth. he knows me way better than most people, the fact that we have been friends long before this often stabbing me in the back, this a perfect example of him being able to read me like a book, able to easily decipher the fact that i am lying.

he slides into me, my mouth falling open as my walls stretch to accustom to his size, forgetting how good he feels inside of me, wondering how i had lasted this long without him, his touch a drug, making me act out in ways i cannot explain, my mind far past seeing him as just a quick fuck. no matter how much i lie to his face, i know that i can’t escape the way i feel, completely hopeless, unable to stay away, the way he strokes in and out of me showing me exactly why i need him. his head falls back as he drags his teeth into his lips, a low groan coming from him as he bottoms out, his dick fully inside of me.

“bullshittt.” he drags out, a small smirk still tugging on his lips. “you and i both know you enjoy this as much as i do. so tell me, what’s the real reason?”

he starts out slow, his thrusts strong, building up a steady pace as he waits for my response, expecting me to continue the conversation as if his dick isn’t inside me. he knows that i am unable to respond, high-pitched moans the only thing spilling from my mouth, his name a mantra, pouring from my lips as he hits all the right places, knowing that he is the only one that can fuck me this good.

“cat got your tongue, huh?” he mocks, his hand finding its way around my neck, applying enough pressure for small whines to leave my mouth, but not enough to hurt me. he laughs at my silence, any confidence i had now lost as i am willingly a puppet attached to his strings, allowing myself to be at his mercy if it means that he will carry on fucking me this good.

i try to respond, but each attempt comes out as a choked moan, tom giving me the benefit of the doubt, speeding up his pace and deciding to pleasure me, saving the questions for later, partly because he is desperate himself, chasing his own release.

“fuck- missed this pussy. missed you so much baby. you feel so good.” he moans, lips finding mine in a sloppy kiss.

my heart twists at his words, butterflies dancing in my stomach as him saying he missed me is almost enough to make me cum on the spot, telling me that my distance wasn’t completely for nothing. but, it doesn’t take me long to come to my senses, soon realising that he didn’t miss me at all, this is his way of sweet talking me, keeping me coming back to him - it is his words that stop me from leaving, addicted to his utterances of praise, knowing that they are nothing but lies.

“no you didn’t.” i moan out, accidentally speaking my mind.

i don’t think he processes what i say, managing a small ‘huh’, his pace never slowing down as he continues to hit the places where i long to feel him most.

“you didn’t miss me- fuck! stop lying.” i groan, struggling to speak properly, high off of the feeling of his dick.

“i did. needed you so bad- but you wouldn’t give in. drove me fucking crazy.” he confesses, placing both his hands on my ass and pushing me in and out of him as my body now meets his harsh thrusts, only intensifying the feeling as his words send me into oblivion, the things that he is saying exactly what i want to hear, yet i am reluctant to believe them.

“tried so hard to forget about you. nobody else feels as good as you do baby- just wanted you.”

he continues to feed my delusions, thrusting in and out of me, his pace much faster as i can tell he is close. but, behind the pleasure, i somehow feel sad, longing for his words to be true, my eyes welling up as i become angry, tired of him making me feel like he actually wants me, just for us to go back to being friends until he is horny again the next night.

“stop saying shit like this, you know you don’t mean it.” i breathe out, my voice shaky as the tears spill out of my eyes.

he looks upwards, noticing my sad expression, his eyebrows furrowing as he stops thrusting, staying inside me as he catches his breath.

“woah woah, what’s going on?” he asks, repeatedly pecking my lips whilst the tears continue to fall, the moment of intimacy completely lost as i start to feel nothing but embarrassment for breaking down, becoming so vulnerable in front of him. but, before all of this, he was and still is my friend - his look of concern reminding me that he does care about me, but not in the way i want him to.

“is this why you’ve been avoiding me?” he starts, pulling out of me and grabbing his jeans, quickly putting them on, not bothering with a shirt yet. i sit naked on the counter, sobbing my heart out, a complete and utter mess. i can do nothing but nod my head, tom looking even more confused than before, unable to connect the dots. “talk to me, seriously, you’re acting so strange lately, what’s going on with you?”

“just- forget it. it’s stupid.” i mutter, hopping down from the counter, grabbing my panties and slipping them on. i find my dress, picking it up; just about to put it on before tom’s hand is placed on my shoulder, turning me to face him.

“it’s not stupid. we went from fucking everyday to not talking for days, so there’s clearly something wrong. i’m not leaving until you tell me what’s wrong.” he states, moving his body so that he is against the door, leaning against it and basically trapping me in.

“it really doesn’t matter tom-”

“you’re upset. you matter to me, so stop downplaying this and just talk to me.” he softly says, another lie pouring from his lips, anger surging through my body as he unknowingly carries on hurting me.

“there you go again! stop fucking lying to me!” i quickly shout, my emotions getting the better of me as he looks back at me, confusion evident on his face.

“what do you mean lie to you? when have i ever lied to you?” he asks, totally oblivious, pissing me off even more.

“you can’t be fucking serious - literally every time we fuck! you tell me all this shit, that you miss me, that i’m your favourite, no one makes you feel like i do, but it’s all just bullshit!” i pour out my feelings to him as he listens, taking in every word i say, his expression becoming even more puzzled. “you say these things to me, then you go back to treating me like a friend, and i can’t take it anymore tom. i just- i can’t.”

he stays silent, a breathy sigh escaping his lips as he leans his head against the door, looking upwards at the ceiling.

“who says it’s bullshit, hm?” he finally says, his eyes meeting mine. he looks a little hurt, offended at my words.

my eyebrows furrow, lips parting slightly as i try to comprehend what he has just said. “what do you mean?” is all i can ask, my eyes glossy as tears threaten to fall.

he says nothing, deciding actions speak louder than words. instead, he steps forward, cupping my face in his hands, softly colliding his lips with mine. it is not filled with lust, no sexual intent behind it, like the kisses we share usually are. it is filled with passion, warm and comforting, unlike anything he has ever shown me before.

“i mean that nothing i’ve ever said to you is a lie.”

i stay quiet, in disbelief of his sudden confession as it is totally unexpected, not sure what to say in response, still hesitant to believe he is telling the truth.

“why do you think i always come back to you? you know i’m not one to stay with one girl. but i stuck with you. i know that we were just fucking, but to me, it’s more, it’s always been more. i care for you more than those girls i hook up with. you’re so much more than that.” he speaks slowly, stroking the skin of my cheek with his thumb, letting each word sink in, meaning every single one.

“i don’t know tom- do you mean it?” i ask, still hesitant.

he nods his head, kissing my forehead gently before pulling me into a hug, resting his chin on my head, his embrace providing me with all the security i need as he confirms the truth of his words, holding me tightly, his next sentence causing my heart to swell.

“i want to be with you.”

requests are open! keep sending them in!!

[tch8mnis]

OPPOSITES ATTRACT - JAMAL MUSIALA

summary: while she’s bold and outgoing and he’s quiet and reserved, they were bound to crack at some point right?

thank u so much for the request @amirareads i hope i did this justice!!

genre: angst (mostly just arguing), fluff, happy ending

“i just think you need to calm down a bit on the social media! why are you twisting my words?”

“i’m not twisting your words jamal but your trying to control my life and how i present myself because you only care about yourself!”

the argument had been ongoing for hours. days even, which is why the tension between the two is so high. ultimately, the two never fought until recently.

the problem was, they were just extremely different.

jamal never liked for his private life to be too much in the public. although it was difficult considering he’s one of the best young footballers in the world playing for one of the best clubs in europe, he did a pretty good job keeping his private life private.

y/n was the complete opposite.

the internet loved her despite having her own job outside of social media. during the euros, she was labeled “the princess of germany” or “the wag of the tournament”. everyone loved her.

after the amount of attention she gained, she started receiving brand deals. vogue wanted to interview her and she even became a fashion nova ambassador. her life totally changed after that and she would say it changed for the better.

jamal would disagree.

don’t get him wrong, he was over the moon with how happy y/n was. he loved the fact that people were starting to see her in the light he saw her in.

but then it got too much.

he couldn’t ignore the amount of thirst comments he’s seen in her comments from random men, especially other footballers. that pissed him off.

so was it jealousy? maybe. he wouldn’t deny it.

but then with the amount of deals she was getting, some of them required her to go to events. a lot of them.

jamal was a laid back type of guy. he didn’t mind going out with his girlfriend, of course not. but it got to the point where it was overwhelming for him. it felt like his private life was now becoming public the more attention y/n got and he didn’t know how to deal with it.

he didn’t want to blame his girlfriend because it really wasn’t her fault but it became stressful.

which is how they got here.

the pair were seated at the secluded part of the restaurant having dinner. it was their 2 year anniversary which was extremely special to the both of them.

they were enjoying their time together until jamal brought up the topic that’s been bothering him for the past week.

and then, the arguement started.

it wasn’t quite classy for them to argue in a restaurant but here they were.

“that’s not what it is, though.” jamal groaned dragging his hands down his face. he was starting to get a headache and trying his hardest not to cause a scene.

y/n furrowed her eyebrows before leaning in a bit. “well help me understand then because that’s what it sounds like.”

the boy sighed. he could feel the guilt brewing in his stomach for starting this whole conversation in the first place. he should’ve just kept quiet.

“it’s just….” he started, softly grabbing the girl’s hands across the table. “you’ve started to become more of a public figure or whatever and that’s not a bad thing at all but it feels like it affects my private life a bit which i’m not really comfortable with i guess.” he tried to explain, watching his girlfriend’s reaction carefully. he truly didn’t know how to explain it without sounding selfish.

y/n scoffed, pulling her hands away from jamal’s leaving his cold tense. “are you kidding me? i get that you want to keep your life private, trust me i do and you can keep doing that but you can’t blame me for that. it’s like your saying you want me to stop doing these brand deals and events that you claimed to be happy about.”

“that's not what im saying-"

that's exactly what you're saying!"

“no it’s not, fuck! i can’t do this right now” he snapped before pushing his chair out and gathering his stuff. y/n watched in confusion as he placed his card on the table and stood up from his seat. “im going back to the house, if we keep arguing im gonna say something i’ll regret and i can’t do that.” he murmured turning on his feet and walking away, leaving the girl sitting at her seat with tears in her eyes.

she hadn’t even knew what just happened. one minute they were smiling and reminiscing old times and the next her boyfriend was walking out leaving her alone in a restaurant with no way to get home.

y/n thanked her uber driver before opening the door just to see her and jamal’s house come into view. she can see his car parked in the driveway meaning he arrived home.

after he left her alone.

her heart was still aching from the argument. they’ve had a few arguments here and there in their relationship but never to the point where he walked away from her like that. she sped up her walking towards the door feeling her throat close up as the tears continued to spill. she pulled her house keys out her bag and opened the door quietly. the house was dead silent which made her second guess jamal’s presence but then his car keys sat on the kitchen counter told her he was there.

she slipped her heels off and left them at the door before walking up the stairs, pausing when she was at her bedroom door. the lights were off but you can still see the clear figure of someone lying in the bed.

that figure being jamal.

he was sound asleep, soft snores coming from his mouth. she quietly slipped into the room, pulled her pajamas from the closet and walked right back out towards the guest room.

there was no way she was sleeping with him tonight.

after changing she slipped into the very unfamiliar bed and closed her eyes trying to fall asleep. it was difficult. of course it was. she never slept without jamal right next to her unless he had an away game she couldn’t make it to. but other than that? this was totally new for her and she didn’t like it.

she finally fell asleep when the sun started to rise and only slept for about 3 hours before waking up again. her eyes still burned from the tears she cried the night before. she slowly got out of bed and went to the bathroom where she brushed her teeth and took a shower, then walking downstairs to cook breakfast.

it was obvious jamal was still asleep. training started later on in the day today so he was able to sleep in.

was she still upset? of course she was, but she was still going to cook for him. she would never not feed him despite what situation they were in.

she settled for some basic pancakes with eggs and bacon. it was jamal’s favorite.

a part of her didn’t want to give him anything at all after yesterday, but she couldn’t do that.

eventually jamal woke up and walked downstairs after getting himself together to see his girlfriend making 2 separate plates of food.

the sight of y/n made his heart clench. he regretted everything that went down yesterday. he had time to reflect on everything and realized he was being incredibly wrong and selfish and it only made it worse to walk out the way he did.

if he could go back and change what he did, he would.

he quietly walked over to where she placed his plate of food and sat down, watching her walk over and sit next to him. they both ate in silence but it wasn’t the awkward silence.

it was more of a calming silence. you wouldn’t be able to tell something went down last night.

but it did. and they had talk about it.

after they finished eating she gathered both their plates and walked to the sink getting ready to clean them and that’s when jamal began to speak.

“i know your mad about yesterday..” he spoke with a shaky voice. “and trust me you have every right to be. i had time last night to think about everything and realize how wrong i was and im really sorry about that. my intentions were to never blame you or anything like that i was just being selfish and only thinking about myself and i regret it so much bc your the thing i care the most about in this world and leaving you at the restaurant alone at night will haunt me for days because i really can’t believe i did that. you mean the absolute world to me and im really sorry.” by the time he was finished speaking, y/n was already done with the dishes and listening to him speak.

she stood there for a while before walking toward him. he followed her figure until she reached him and watched as she wrapped her arms around him. the second she did, his tense body relaxed and wrapped his hands around her waist to bring her closer.

“i’m so so sorry, please forgive me.” he begged into her neck as she softly scratched the back of his neck. she was upset but she could never stay mad at him. she loved him too much.

“it’s okay i promise.” she hugged him tighter, wanting to be closer to him. he then pulled away and leaned in to place his lips on hers, feeling the tension slowly drift away between the two as their lips moved together.

when they ran out of breath, they both pulled away and jamal leaned his forehead against hers.

“i love you”

“i love you too.”

author’s note: omg this was supposed to come out last week i’m so sorry for the delay but i hope you enjoyed regardless!

[tinidor-theodore]

"If he'd let me, I'd kiss every mole and freckle on his skin."

Pairing: Michael Afton X Male Reader Tws: Smoking weed, homophobia, and parental abuse. Tropes: Kissing while high, childhood best friends, situationship, sneaking in at night, and homophbic parents on Michael's part. AN: either before bite of 83 or in an au where it didnt happen. either way, you and mike are teens here. You and Michael have had a thing for each other for a while, and both of you are terrible at hiding it so both of you know, but michael is a lot more scared than you are and tries to content himself with what he convinces himself is still friendship. Btw i wrote this while listening to Bad Idea by Girl in Red so i highly suggest you listen to it while reading this

Blue eyes followed my fingers as they danced across the strings, the sound of my voice singing a peaceful lullaby made him feel as if weights were being placed on his eyes.

I gently placed my guitar on it's stand, lighting another joint with one hand and ruffling Michael's auburn curls with the other. My eyes meet his as they try to resist drooping.

We were both higher than a kite, the smoke and smell filling the air in his room. My fingers slipped from his hair, tracing his features like he's made of porcelain.

My thumb lingered on his lip, tracing around a fresh wound. "Where'd you get this one?" I'd asked, frowning, despite the feeling that I already knew.

He placed his rough palms over my hand, wrapping long and slender fingers around mine. "Father," he replied curtly, and I didn't bother asking further.

"I missed you," he said fondly, pressing his lips to my palm.

"I wish you'd kiss me somewhere else" nearly slipped through my teeth, substituted hastily with "I missed you too."

A stupid grin formed on his face as Michael placed more kisses on my hands. Mike knew what he was doing when he placed one on my wrist. He could settle for this but I couldn't.

I'd grabbed his collar, I pressed my lips against his, the cold metal of my piercings sending shivers down his spine. I tangled my hands in his hair while his hands busied themselves with sitting up and pulling me onto his lap.

We weren't supposed to kiss. I knew I had crossed the line when I felt chapped lips and tasted his blood.

I knew we'd regret it, but can you blame me? The way his eyes looked, glazed over and relaxed as he watched my every move. The desperation was evident in his eyes, but I could see fear, shame, and restraint.

I'd never been one for patience, or self control. He could stop himself all he wants, but he couldn't stop me.

Neither of us could get enough. We held onto each other like the world would end if we didn't.

I couldn't let go, I wish I didn't.

Footsteps hit hard against the floor of the hallway outside his room, the hinges screamed as the door slammed open for his father.

He covers the little amount of light pouring in from outside, instead filling the room with a sense of fear.

Michael had pushed me off, and I could see the sinking feeling on his face, shaking like a leaf.

His voice waivered, trying to ignore the tears forming in his eyes. "I think you should leave."

I did as I was told, two pairs of eyes staring holes into me as I softly shut the door behind me.

That was the last time we spoke. I saw him at school the next day, a face full of bruises and a slap mark. He wore a hoodie I let him borrow once, bandages concealed under sleeves. He avoided me every time I tried to talk to him, scared into distancing himself from me.

I don't think he told anyone, god knows what would happen if anyone found out the son of William Afton was kissing boys.

"I wish I never kissed him," is what I tell myself every night, but with each passing day I start to wonder if it was our faults or if we're really that bad. If only they saw the way he smiles at me, the way he intently listens to every song I show him, and the way he blushes at the slight brush of my hand.

It didn't take long for me to start wondering why he's scared of liking me. Is there something wrong with me? Is it how I act? Or is he scared of how others will act? Why should it matter? We don't need them, we shouldn't care what they think. They can say what they want, and do what they "must" but the stars watching our every move will dance together the way I wish we would.