#I have a funny guy for every faction now

[impossible-rat-babies]

I was fussing around in the cc and all I could think was like eshka in the epcot ball vine voice

[damiansgoodgirll]

Can i request a Damian Priest x girlfriend reader where reader gets mad with Damian and the rest of judgement day for the way they treat R Truth. so she defends Truth much to Damian's dismay.

pls i love r-truth so much

damian priest x reader

not fair

“i’m just saying, the way you guys are treating him it’s not fair” you tried to excuse damian’s behaviour towards r-truth.

you’ve always liked him.

he was fun. a gentle soul to be around and he always treated you right. he had nothing against you even if you were damian’s girlfriend.

he wanted to be part of the judgment day too. you didn’t know why. why someone kind and honest like him wanted to be part of the most cheating faction.

yet, it would have been fun to see him with the group but the way they were treating him, especially your boyfriend was making you mad.

“we don’t need new members in the group…” he tried to explain himself.

“yet you let jd in” it’s not that you didn’t like jd, you just didn’t see the value of having him in the group when there were more talented wrestlers in the business.

“just because finn wanted him, he’s part of the team and he wanted jd in…no one in our team wants r-truth in tho…” damian said again.

“i want r-truth in! do you know how funny that would be?” you tried to explain again.

“but y/n, you’re not a part of the group…not anymore”

“so my opinion doesn’t matter?”

yes, due to an injury sustained while you were still one of the original members of the judgment day along side with damian, rhea and edge, you had to quit wrestling to give your body time to recover.

only fact it’s been years now and your body hasn’t recovered yet.

you didn’t leave the wwe. you were still ringside to every member’s match, helping them as you could. you were backstage interviewing other wrestlers when you could, so, a part of you was happy that you didn’t have to leave but you wished that your group would consider your opinion a little more.

“no love its not that…your opinion matters…”

you scoffed “to who? it doesn’t seem like that it matters to you damian…i’m just saying you should consider the idea of having someone like in the group…people love him, he’s fun and hilarious and he makes people laugh…”

“we are the judgment day y/n, we don’t need to make people laugh, i’m pretty sure that adding him in the group would only make us look ridiculous…” damian said.

“whats going on here? we’ve been hearing you talking all the way down to the corridor…is everything okay?” finn said entering the locker room along side with dom and rhea.

“y/n was just trying to convince us or just me, to have r-truth in the group” damian said making the other two guys laugh.

you didn’t think it was that funny. they just didn’t want to see your point of view.

“why would we have to y/n?” rhea said. she was your best friend but sometime she couldn’t understand why you would get such weird ideas.

“for the millionth time…he’s a likeable person, people love him, i like him too, he’s funny and kind and he would bring a different tone to the group…i just think that he would be perfect as a new member of the group…he’s different and he proved to you many times he wants to be a part of the group…so why not?”

“that’s absolute nonsense y/n” rhea said, finn and dom agreeing with her. damian too.

“okay fine, do what you want. i’m tired of talking with ghosts…” you said leaving the room.

you’ve been supporting their crazy and nonsense ideas since you’ve left the group. but having them laughing on you just because you had a good idea wasn’t fair.

that day you talked to r-truth, explaining him that you tried your best to have him in the group but that they wouldn’t listen as they thought that your opinion didn’t matter anymore.

you loved the group.

damian was your boyfriend. rhea was your best friend. but sometimes you couldn’t go along with their ideas and most of the times you ended up fighting over stupid things.

“why don’t you join me and the miz ringside?” r-truth proposed to you “you’re too funny for the judgment day anyway” he said making you laugh.

“that’s a complete different role from what i had in the judgment day…”

“i know. you had to help them win, cheating of course. you had to cover for their lies and mistakes and even if that’s what the group is about, even if you can’t wrestle anymore, i’m pretty sure that there’s still something more than you could do…i’m not saying you should officially leave the group, i’m just saying, come ringside in one of our matches and see what happens, maybe that would change your mind” he said smiling at you before leaving.

once you were back at the hotel, you thought about the proposal.

maybe you should have given a try.

“hey…i’ve been looking for you everywhere” damian said before sitting next to you on the bed.

“yeah…i talked with r-truth…”

“i imagined it…” he whispered.

“he said that maybe i should leave the judgement day and join him and the miz…”

“what did you say?” he asked you.

“ that I have to think about it…but damian please, think about that too. my opinions are no longer welcomed in the group and honestly i just feel like a burden and you’re my boyfriend and we keep constantly fighting over stupid things and…and if leaving the group means that you and i or rhea and i are not gonna fight anymore then i’m okay with that…” you explained.

damian was watching you. “i don’t like the idea of you leaving the group honestly…but i can tell you are no longer happy with us…so if that makes you happy then go for it”

“you guys make me so happy, but i don’t feel respected anymore…”

“we’ve been hard with you, i know that. honestly i’m not fond of jd too” he said making you laugh “and your ideas are always brilliant it’s just that maybe they aren’t brilliant for our group? you are my girlfriend and in these years i kinda got to know you…you’re always looking for new things, new adventures and that’s something i love about you…don’t let our ideas discourage you to do so mi amor” damian said, trying to justify his shitty behaviour of before.

“i just wished we could do those brilliant ideas together as a group but sometimes my idea aren’t meant for everyone and i get that…i just wished you guys had a better way to express that tho…” you said, still offended by how they treated you before.

“i know and i’m so sorry about that. our tones hadn’t been nice and i apologise for that mi amor, disculpame…” he apologised, softly taking your hands in his bigger ones and kissing them.

“you’re excused…” you smiled.

“think about his proposal and do what is best for you, at the end of the day it’s me you’re coming home too, and i couldn’t be happier” he said, making you genuinely smile.

damian supported you, no matter what and that was everything for you.

————————————-

bonus gif :

[maythedreadwolftakeyou]

I've never played a Veil Jumper but like are you guys okay do you need me to file a report with HR or something lol what did Strife do/say to you guys

cannot stress enough how unhappy this man is to discover you're not only back in town, but Involved In Some More Bullshit. and he strongly implies it's all your fault Elgar'nan and Gilan'nain are out now AND why Arlathan is falling apart AND these are just more reasons why you're a disappointment to him specifically 😞

here's the convo... the only option you can pick that addresses your history/backstory with them is the confrontational one which i guess says a lot about their relationship lol

the Veiljumper backstory is you were out with others in Arlathan, and responsible for a map to a site with lots of ancient elven artifacts. however suddenly everyone else was in Mortal Peril and you save them but lose the map. he gets mad at you for putting lives ahead of the artifacts and kicks you out for a while.

mind you. when you first go to Arlathan and find the Veiljumpers, they are running from an ancient elven construct, which Irelin is trying to control with another piece of technology. when she can't get it working in time and the construct is going to behead everyone Strife sticks his sword through the device to shut the construct down SO LIKE HE DID THE EXACT SAME THING HES SOOOOO MAD AT ME FOR 😭 and also takes a moment to comfort Irelin but all Rook gets is indifference at best or contempt at worst

like. some resentment. SOME resentment 😂 to be clear i both 1. still like Strife a lot esp from his pre-game media (short story/podcast) and 2. do think this is VERY VERY FUNNY. As much as I enjoy Viago pretending he doesn't very much care about my Rook de Riva, I think it is an absolutely HILARIOUS choice to have factions where the leader straight up doesn't like you. i wish the game would let me argue with Strife MORE. i wish we could bicker every time i go back to camp. it would be so fucking funny. as is i think him mostly ignoring you like... works, but in terms of actually playing, mostly just felt bland/like a writing weakness vs a character choice. closing my eyes and headcanoning about it instead.

however this is also why i think my Rook managed to weather Lucanis not responding to her flirting. if you want her to leave you alone you have to be straight up hostile. in comparison to Strife, anyone NOT yelling at her was a welcome improvement i guess 😂

[nessacousland]

can i ask what was ur problem with treviso? i actually found treviso and the crows to be the most interesting faction out of all of them so maybe im just biased LOL

Okay, full disclosure: I was on vacation and didn’t get to play Veilguard until the 8th of November. Couldn’t take the potential spoilers everywhere, so I've been cramming these past few days to finish the game asap (I still did every side quest, had all factions at max strength and got the “best” ending etc. but didn’t do every chests/stats puzzle). By the time the Treviso questline concluded, I'd been fully marinating in the sauce of all the other criminally stupid quests, is what I’m trying to say, and Treviso was emblematic of every problem I already had with this game. It was my breaking point.

To start with, the questline is offensively generic and an actual insult to the players’ intellect. Painfully linear, cartoon villains abound and nothing of any substance was ever said during its run.

The moment Caterina told us about Lucanis’ non-death, I called Illario being the traitor. There were no clever misdirects, there were no other leads, nope, they showed us his hand *immediately*. Grandma First Talon of the murder guild has a clear favorite and didn’t tell the ‘spare’ heir about her suspicions? Yeah, okay. Repeat FAMILY as often as you want, you piss-poor Godfather knockoff of a questline, I ain't buying.

So, from the start, all tension is gone, I'm just sitting there waiting for the rest of these “capable” assassins who “rule Antiva from the shadows” to catch on to this incredibly obvious plot twist. Meanwhile, the quests had absolutely nothing interesting to say - about the Crows or Treviso. The first bad guy was, predictably, an evil evil Venatori, super more evil than the evil evil Venatori you've seen before, guys, she literally BATHES IN BLOOD. Omg, right? 🙄 (I found Tevinter infinitely more compelling when their entire ruling class were power-hungry tyrants out of self-interest instead of being hit over the head with the mustache-twirling villain/crazed cultist stick).

Mr. “totally not the traitor” kills Zara before she can tell us anything of substance, she dies,clearly shocked, calling him “Amatus”...AND NO ONE CATCHES ON. You can have Neve on the team, Bellara regularly reads Tevinter serials (the whole team has a fucking book club in the middle of an apocalypse), you can play a freaking Shadow Dragon Rook, but nah, nothing. We don’t even get to ask “Uh, what was that?”. Instead, we get to sit through more pointless missives/quests while the ever capable Crows are totally investigating the traitor.

Now, you could argue that the “Amatus” was a reward to tip off those of us who’ve played the previous games and know what the term means. But with a plot this threadbare and obvious…did the writers think they’re Agatha Christie here? Did they really think I was at the edge of my seat, desperate to find out “whodunit” and grateful for any crumbs thrown my way?

Well, anyway, we are told a million times over that super charming (where?) Illario is just “like that” every time he acts super freaking suspicious. (The funeral thing with Caterina's ashes was especially funny.)

You'd think those instances would start to add up and prompt someone - anyone - to start using their brains (don't we have a goddamn detective on our team?!), but NOPE. We have to corpse-whisper to progress this questline. One of the biggest ass-pulls they've introduced via this game in general, in my opinion (is this Forbidden Realms and we just unlocked the Speak with the Dead spell?) - and it acts as the deus ex machina here to finally give us a clue. Wow, thanks.

The entire sequence of Lucanis confronting Illario in front of the assembled mafia felt like something out of an Antivan play. So goddamn goofy. I thought that vibe was charming in Josephine's romance quest - Antivans live for the drama - but they wanted us to take this moment seriously. This is Lucanis confronting his “all he has left” (don't get me started on the Fade sequence - apparently we the players can’t grasp anyone's motivations without having them spelled out for us over and over again) for putting him through hell and changing his entire being forever. Should I be laughing right now?

To make matters worse,we're told that the Crows are the perfect killers who never leave a contract unfinished - and then Lucanis spares Illario because the humiliation is the biggest punishment??? Like, I'm fine with him faltering here, that’s human. But this should have had consequences. This is the murder guild we're talking about here. Lucanis’ parents were literally killed in a different house’s coup attempt. He was just made the head mobster, immediately showed weakness in front of the entire mafia and everything is just dandy fine??? Because FAMILY?

Another personal gripe with this is that - as always - Rook had zero agency. No matter what you do, Lucanis will forgive or spare Illario. Imagine if we had the option to convince him to kill him instead. Imagine the resulting resentment tainting our bond with him and having us actively engage with fixing or breaking it. Imagine us going along with his mercy but hashing out the painful consequences for his house with him. But that’s not the game Veilguard is.

Anyway, the quest then becomes even more ridiculous. We've long learned that a human traitor helped the Antaam claim Treviso overnight. Someone with great knowledge of the city and the necessary power to make it happen. Gee, I'm sure the human GOVERNOR regularly hanging out in the Crow headquarters or the market bitching about the Crows’ interference 24/7 - the ONLY town official we get to see - had nothing to do with it. Five scarves fluttered in shock out of five, great job, guys.

The Butcher thing was just…weird. Like, we get to hear and build him up as this totally different antaam leader, cruel but cunning and calculating, someone who will be difficult to dethrone. Only for him to show up out of nowhere and serve no other purpose than to move the main plot forward asap and die. Lol, thanks for your service, I guess.

Then Ivenci, for no fucking reason, decides that they, like any good cartoon villain, should reveal themselves to us just in order to gloat. Um, why don’t they simply order the Antaam to murder us dead right then and there? If Rook and their plucky team of friends are too powerful for that, why haven’t we taken Treviso by force already? But nah, lol, our plot armor doesn’t have any cracks yet, so they literally tell us to go away and try to disturb the gods’ plans, because those guys will totally kill us for them.

Now, we wait again. Excuse me, isn’t this a questline about assassins? Why aren’t we trying to, y'know, assassinate Ivenci? Cut off the snakes's head, how often have we heard this phrase otherwise? Nah, let's wait till we get another letter that shit is going down that the Crows totally didn’t anticipate and THEN let's confront them. (Ofc, the Crows’ investigation of the qamek stalled forever. Cause they’re incompetent.)

But the thing that really broke me…we KNOW Ivenci stole a bunch of special qamek. We run at them THROUGH A GREEN POISON CLOUD. And my Rooks's just like “Huhhh? Is something possibly messing with my mind right now?”. YOU STUPID POS.

And then, ofc, we end the questline and Jacobus pops outta nowhere to spare Ivenci because a good pirate never steals and a good assassin never kills, I guess. Jacobus founds his new house to basically become a big mafia family for orphans like him which everyone is super proud of, because, if the previous installments of the game have taught us anything, it's that the Crows are deeply concerned with the well-being of orphans. Whoop dee doo, the end.

Okay, more notes. It’s been mentioned plenty already that this game has completely neutered the Crows and turned them into edgy found family freedom fighters. Personally, I'm not okay with the explanation that this is simply a different house than House Arainai. Because what the actual fuck, game. Why is Ivenci the bad guy when they're literally right about everything?! Where's my option to agree with them that a fucking murder mafia shouldn’t be the ruling force of a town, let alone the entire country? Why is the municipal government the enemy while my non-Crow Rook keeps shouting “Viva the Crows”??? Are you really telling me that the Crows are the good guy mafia and House Arainai was the bad outlier? Is that what this is?

Look, I'm fine with allying with the Crows if that’s what necessity dictates. We're trying to stop the SUPER BLIGHT here. But don’t sugarcoat that this is us joining forces with the mob. The way Veilguard presents them makes me cringe cause they're basically just leather-clad incompetent fools larping as birds. Show us the reality of this alliance. Get into the nitty-gritty. Make this world feel real. God.

I *wanted* to like this questline. Out of every country in Northern Thedas, I've always been most interested in Antiva. The whole medievalesque guilds system and merchant princes, the mediterranean romance and drama, pirates and Crows, the snazzy outfits and Spanish accents, god, normally, I'm eating that shit UP. I didn’t even think twice about which city to save. Partially because Minrathous was better fortified and Venatori seemed like the lesser evil vs. blighted water, of course, but mostly because Treviso is absolutely gorgeous and Zevran and Josephine instilled a lot of love for Antiva in me that I just don’t feel for Tevinter. I also thought that the setup was very interesting - professional assassins turned into freedom fighters of their occupied turf. And it *would* have been if they had let them remain, y'know, the actual murder mafia they always were.

But aside from my gripes about the Crows’ portrayal, the entire questline was just a total nothing burger. This is the first time ever that we're actually in Antiva, our introduction, so to speak, and what do we learn about the place? That there’s strife and betrayal among the Crows? Um, yeah, Zevran covered that fifteen years ago. There’s nothing new whatsoever. Imagine if our primary goal had actually been to help the Crows free Treviso. That we're working to loosen the Butcher's grasp on the town via strategic assassinations (i.e. actual Crow missions) that also introduce us to Treviso's people/Antivan culture (taking out someone during a theatre play, for example! The drama!), the internal politics of the Merchant princes and the municipal government's struggle to keep this occupied city from imploding. Imagine us getting caught up in this web of intrigue as we get closer and closer to the Butcher and then suddenly, we're being played. And only *then* do we start to suspect a traitor among the Crows’ ranks and the whole thing unravels. Spitballing even further, why repeat the Crow/Venatori romance in a random side quest with random people? Why not have Zara and Illario be actually in love, but he kills her for his ambition anyway? And instead of taking responsibility for his actions, he blames Lucanis for forcing his hand? Or maybe, they both thought they were playing the other and as another power hungry asshole, Zara almost respects Illario for the hussle as she dies? *Some* messiness and drama? (Cause Varric’s initial narration sequence made Zara seem like this blood-soaked femme fatale but the actual narrative gave zero fucks about that vibe. Discount Countess Bathory wannabe).

That might just be what I would have wanted and nobody else, but I still maintain that anything would have been better than this cookie-cutter, baby’s first mafia story that is beat for beat exactly what you'd expect and have seen before.

Well, this was a long rant. I don’t intend to make a habit of shitting on things others enjoy on here, but my emotions are still running high after finishing the game yesterday and you did ask. Sorry.

[banananuttrash]

Busted

Prompt: When Binzo is acting completely out of character, the rest of the Suzuran group follow him to see what is up. What they find leaves everyone in surprise, except for one.

Warnings: fluff 

Request: No

Pairing: Miyauchi Kozo “Binzo” x Female Reader ; Raoh x Sister Reader

Word count: 1.8k

Notes: This was just me having the Raoh faction acting like fools lol 😆

⋈ *. : ｡✿ * ﾟ * .: ｡ ✿ * ﾟ * . : ｡ ✿ * ⋈

Mashii and the rest of the Raoh faction are sitting in their regular area on the school roof. They are having their lunch and just chatting. However, Mashii notices that Binzo is sitting off the side on his phone, with a hint of a smile on his face.

Binzo’s phone rings and he gets up. He looks at everyone and says, “I have to take this call, I’ll be right back.”

As he walks off, Mashii narrows his eyes and stares off after him, while saying, “There’s something off about him.”

Everyone else turns to look at him. Kamui speaks up first, “What do you mean?”

“I haven’t quite figured out what it is yet, but Binzo is acting differently.”

Magoroku shoots up and says, “I’ve noticed it too! A couple of days ago, I asked him if he wanted to go to that new ramen place that had opened up. We had been talking about it for weeks and then he just up and left me hanging saying that there was something important that he had to do. He never leaves me hanging when it comes to food.”

Mashii lights a cigarette, “I’m not sure, but I think we should keep an eye out on him.”

Later on that day after school, the Raoh faction is heading out. After school, the group usually goes out for some snacks together. Today, it was Binzo’s turn to pick a place to go so everyone looks at him expectantly. When Binzo notices that everyone is staring at him, he rubs his neck and gives everyone a guilty smile, “Sorry guys, I won’t be able to come with you guys today. There are some things that I have to take care of.”

As he walks away, everyone stares at him in disbelief. After the others shake off their disbelief, Kamui asks, “Raoh, do you want to call Y/N over? Can she meet us there?”

Raoh lets out a little grunt and responds, “She can’t make it! She had already planned on hanging out with a friend.” He has a small smile on his face that no one notices.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Binzo makes it just in time to see the girls from Sanyo High School start to come out. He leans against a wall, and scans all the faces until he finds the one that he is looking for.

When he does, Binzo lets out a huge smile and yells, "Y/N!"

You turn around from your friend as you hear your name and see Binzo waving at you. You smile and wave back. Your classmate asks you, "Is that…?" 

You grin, "My boyfriend. I'll see you later!" You both say your goodbyes and depart.

Walking up to Binzo, he stretches out his hand and you take it. You lace your fingers with his and smile at him, "How was your day?"

He smiles back, "Oh you know, the same old. Punching, kicking, yelling, fighting…"

You roll your eyes at him, sarcastically saying, "Ha ha ha, very funny."

You both start walking away from the school when he asks, "Where do you want to go? You can pick today."

"You let me pick every day. But… I really want to go to that new ramen place we were supposed to go to with Magoroku."

"Alright, sounds good to me," he replies, and you start walking to the restaurant.

Thankfully, you arrive before rush hour, so you and Binzo are able to get seats. You get seated near a window and quickly place your orders.

Soon after the waitress leaves, Binzo’s phone rings. He looks at the caller ID and looks back at you, "It's Kansuke. Should I answer?"

You nod, "It'll probably be more suspicious if you don't." 

He listens to you and answers. "Hello?"

You whisper to him that you're going to the bathroom and he nods. You get up and make your way to the bathroom.

Binzo and you started dating about a month ago. Before that, he was just your brother's friend that you had a huge crush on. You would hang around him every now and then when you were with Raoh, and that was just enough to get you to fall for him. While others may look down at him for his crazy side, you loved it. You weren't a big fan of the fighting, but whenever you did hear of one, a small smile came on your face when you hear of his win.

When you finally got the nerve to confess to him, you found out that he felt the same way. When you asked him why he had not said anything before, he answered that he did not want to say anything because you were Raoh's sister and he didn't want to do anything behind his back. So, before he even asked you out on a date, he spoke with Raoh and told him about his feelings and intentions. If possible, that made you fall for him even more. 

It was hard, but Binzo and you decided not to tell the rest of the group just yet. You know how the others are and you wanted to enjoy some time with him. Recently, it has been getting a little harder to hide it from others, but thankfully, Raoh comes through most of the time and manages to help you guys.

You finish up in the bathroom and then head outside to your table. As you get closer you see something and then you freeze up. Even though you can’t see their faces, you see the backs of your brother, Mashii, Magoroku, Kamui, and Kansuke.

You see Binzo peek around them and his eyes widen slightly as he sees you, but tries not to make it obvious as he looks back at the group. You back away and go back to the bathroom not sure of what to do.

Back at the table, Binzo lets out a small sigh of relief when he sees you disappear. He looks back at the guys who are staring at him. He smiles at them, trying not to look as guilty as he is feeling. 

Mashii speaks up first, "What are you doing here? Didn't you have something to do?"

He looks at Raoh, who has a subtle and barely visible smile on his face. Binzo looks back at Mashii and replies, "What am I doing here?" He rubs his neck before continuing, "I was meeting up with an old junior high friend. Yeah! I hadn't seen him in a while, so we decided to catch up."

The others look like they weren't buying it. Before anyone else speaks up, Raoh says, "We should go somewhere else. I'm craving takoyaki."

Everyone looks at Raoh in surprise. He doesn't usually have preferences for restaurants. So for him to say something, it was a little surprising. Binzo knew that he said it to try to get the others to leave, and he was very thankful to Raoh for that.

As the guys leave the restaurant, Binzo sends a quick text back to you and tells you that they are gone. You come back and sit down in front of him and you both start laughing.

Unbeknownst to the couple, outside the restaurant, Mashii turned around one more time and he saw you as you sat down in front of Binzo. Then he whispers to himself, "Y/N?"

~*~*~*~*~*~

For a couple more weeks, it has become more prominent that Binzo has been hiding something. He rarely hangs out with the group and is almost always making excuses about why he can't hang out. Magoroku and Kansuke wanted to get to the bottom of it. They had overheard Binzo say that he was going to meet someone at the amusement park on Saturday morning. Instead of asking him about it, they decided that they were going to follow him.

They told everyone else to meet them at the amusement park on Saturday morning, but didn't tell them why.

So Raoh, Mashii, Magoroku, Kamui, and Kansuke were standing off at the side of the entrance.

Mashii gives a low grunt and asks, "Why are we here?"

Magoroku lifts a finger and says, "We are going to get behind Binzo’s secret once and for all. We know he is secretly meeting someone here today and we are going to figure out who."

Raoh raises his eyebrows at him. To himself he thinks that this is not going to end well. 

Kamui points and shouts, "There he is!"

They all look and see Binzo walking up while talking on the phone. Suddenly, they notice a girl coming from behind him and wrap her arms around his waist.

"Ehhh!" all of them say except Raoh.

"A girlfriend! How does the craziest one of us get one first? It's not fair!" Kansuke says while whining.

"I wonder who it is, we can't see her face," Kamui says, trying to get a look at the girl.

As the guys are still looking, they see Binzo turn toward you and smile. You hold hands and start heading towards the entrance. The guys try to get a closer look at you and, since you are not facing them, they can't see your face.

As you enter the park, the guys follow behind you enough where neither of you notice. You tell Binzo that you have to use the bathroom real quickly before you go on anything. As you turn towards the bathroom, you hear, "Y/N!"

You and Binzo turn around and see your brother and his friends, them staring at you both in shock.

Binzo leans towards you and whispers, "Busted."

About ten minutes later, you and Binzo are sitting next to each other at a cafe with Raoh and his friends in front of you. Magoroku crosses his arms, "How long has this been going on?"

You smile guilty and hold up two fingers, "About two months."

Kansuke pretends to faint, "Two months?!"

Machii looks at Raoh, "I'm guessing you knew about this. Considering how you are not surprised."

The rest of them look at Raoh, who lets out a small smile, "It was entertaining seeing all of you try to figure it out."

Kamui looks at Raoh in shock, "You knew!"

You roll your eyes, "Of course he knew." You look at Binzo and smile, "We didn't want to keep it a secret from Raoh."

"Just from us," says Magoroku, pretending to cry.

Binzo and you roll your eyes. Binzo replies with, "We just wanted to see how it went before we told you guys."

Kamui smiles, "And?" 

Binzo and you look at each other and smile. You look back at them and say, "It's been going really well." The guys look at you for a couple seconds before they start cheering and hitting Binzo’s back, cheering him on.

Raoh stands up and says, "Alright guys, I think we should leave them to their date.

The others grumbled as they stood up. Meanwhile, you look at Raoh and mouth to him, 'Thank you'.

He winks at you and takes the guys with him.

Binzo looks at you and smiles, "Ready for our date?"

You smile back feeling a sense of relief and nod.

[centrally-unplanned]

I played some Victoria 2 today (a Japan campaign ofc, and admittedly with the Historical Flavor Mod), to sort of reflect on it in relation to Vicky 3. It is rough going back to the economy of Vicky 2 after playing 3, let me tell you - you knew intellectually it was "bad" system before, but you loved it anyway because of the full package. But now you can see the alternatives and remove the quotations, it is just bad! Building an ammunition factory that requires sulfur, having domestic RGO sources for sulfur but they are not producing enough to supply even one factory, and just not being able to do anything about it that isn't drastic or long-term because the world market is feeling fucky today is unacceptable once you have played a game where that isn't true. My industrialization strat should not waffle between "build a railroad for a 5% bump in output" and "invade Indonesia", give me a middle ground here guys! And it does not stop there - capitalists are useless, "build factory on RGO and expand forever" is optimal 99% of the time, key technologies will like double your output making them forced decisions, etc.

And, if you are can't build factories because you aren't civlizied yet...you have no econ game at all. You just do virtually nothing. Now that you see how that isn't required, the mechanics are ruthlessly bad in key ways.

But! But but but! I think Vicky 2 is a still a better game. The funny thing about that "I don't have enough sulfur" thing is that I didn't even care. I built the factory "for the future", subsidized it, it outputted zero bullets, and I barely notice because you make so much money anyway you can generally ignore it. I build the factories primarily so I can have clerks staffing them and generating research points! Is that insane game design? Yeah, it is! But it is insane game design that doesn't get in the way. Nothing stops me from building a factory, it just isn't very good. Wanna build a huge military? Encourage some soldiers with your national focuses and go to town. Want to declare war on someone? You can just do that! And then I take the army I built, click it on enemy, and it fights them - revolutionary new approaches to game design folks.

Even politics, where Vicky 2 definitely does get in the way a lot and is actively not-good, it is at least more permissive and more importantly simple. If you have elections you get events to shift voter ideology, and national focuses to boost party support that work exactly the way you would expect. If you are autocratic you can just swap who is in power! Liberals support political reforms, socialists support economic reforms, if you have a majority support for a law click a button and it passes. Done. Putting socialists in power in 1870 Japan might result in a revolution, sure, but it works, you can try it, and try to beat the militant tide.

Meanwhile in Vicky 3 if you are autocratic putting a "minority" faction in power literally breaks your government and prevents you from passing any laws. You can technically do it but you just die immediately. Wanna build a coalition then, where conservatives & agrarians ally together? You technically can again, but the penalty for "non-compatible" coalition partners is so high it 90% of the time crashes you into 0 anyway. So you have the "option" of switching parties, but...you can't. You just have to appoint the landowners every time or you die. So what is the point? Why have the option? Let me play the game!! Let me try reforming things and face a revolution I have 40% odds of losing to! That sounds fun, why are you rigging the game against that?

I tried an Iran run in Vicky 3 earlier, and I had a revolution against the landlords, who had ~50% of the "faction" points in government. I won, and so their points got knocked down to ~0%, how that works. So I made a new government, right? Well, no! Every faction left was "incompatible" with each other and none of them alone could even muster like 30%. I had literally no government capable of passing laws. So I fucking quit the game? Because this was the product of winning a revolution, why would I continue?

In Vicky 2 fascists win a revolution and they coup the government and it's fascist now. You get the fascist laws and can pass reforms they like. There ya go. Done. Is it interesting? No, not really. But it works! It doesn't literally stop you from playing the game.

My Japan game actually started as Satsuma, since in HPM Tokugawa Japan is split into substate Daimyo. I modernized via encouraging intellectuals, took military & railroad reforms, built a modern land army, and built up relations with the other domains. I launched the Meiji Restoration, got 60% of the Daimyo on my side, won the civil war. Began building factories everywhere, built up my industry, built up my research output. Used the new tech & money to build a larger army, fought the Qing in a tough war but got Korea & Taiwan, allied with the UK & built up a steamer industry to get a modern navy. Then Russia got into a crisis with Greece and so the UK and I backed Greece and broke Russia, with me claiming some territories around Manchuria in the process. Later I invaded China proper to annex Manchuria itself and get some treaty ports, easily now because my military was much more advanced. From all that my infamy was high so I coasted into the endgame and pivoted to culture techs to trigger "decisions" around modernizing Japan that gave me bonuses while having nice historical flavor to them.

And generally the game just didn't get in my way on doing all that. I could "tell the story", which for an easy game like Vicky is normally what you are here to do. Vicky 3 is a much better economy simulator, but telling the story beyond that is such a chore, and often impossible. On politics, diplomacy, and especially military, it is philosophically a step backwards such that its more "developed" mechanics cannot compensate for the mistake.

(I think it is funny how much better a gameplay experience the "narrative via decisions" of Vicky 2 w/ HPM is. They give flavor to the nations with a ton of bespoke, scripted events. Which...just works because they are straightforward. Vicky 3 wants to be "emergent" and so limited such events, but missed the forest for the trees there)

I find this sad because honestly there is a "blended" version of these two games that is amazing. Vicky 3's econ system (with tweaks ofc like making trade valuable) and philosophical commitment to minimal military micro (SO finicky in Vicky 2 to replenish armies where individual brigades die off, ugh), with a system that understood storytelling is first. Let players do things, and then give them consequences that are manageable in response. Get out of the way of the stories your sandbox game is built to tell.

[frutiylaris]

Warhammer 40K and 30K Masterlist (Update)

Hell again, this is an update to the warhammer youtuber masterlist that I previously created, it will focus on adding newer creators that were reviewed and checked. If you are confused, please consult the previous Masterlist post. Updated Scores: MajorKill 0/10 - Harassment, no matter the context or circumstance is not acceptable. I'd say do better but that discord and community he has is vile. A blight upon warhammer creators The Serpents Lodge [Removed] - After recent investigation, brought up with private concern from a blogger here. The lodge has been removed for their behaviour. New Creators added: Chaotic Voices 0/10 - Supporting harassment is frowned upon, no matter the context or circumstance. Live from the black library! 0/10 -I knew Chrono, at least by proxy, and whilst they were fine back then... information has been given to me that I cannot share showing me how horrible of a person they are. I'm sorry that your life is not great, but that is not a shield you can wield agaisnt criticism. Isyander & Koda 7/10 - Whilst there are minor errors here and there, probably one of the better "casual" sources of warhammer podcasts to get into. However, point deducted for giving community memes the time of day. Explaining Warhammer to my girlfriend 3/10 - I'm happy for them, I see them occasionally on the dash and the whole content idea works well for what they want from it, but you aren't a good source due to broad sweeping statements. Keep up the passion, though! Idiotic Synergy 5/10 - A wee bit cringe with the voice acting but good hearted and clearly enjoying himself, but please for the love of god stop with the femboy fulgrim jokes, it's not that funny. DreadAnon 0/10 - Thanks for the tutorial reminding me that Analog, delay and echo exist in Adobe Audition, but associating and spreading misinfo from the 'chudhammer' space is grounds for exilement. Adeptus Ridiculous 0/10 - I am biased against Bricky due to his networking with Vtubers, I despise Vtubers. However, this is judging a channels merits. The bookclub? A step in the right direction, but you've exposed yourself as an idiot for not reading ANY BOOKS. For someone who speaks so confidently and with gusto you sure are not qualfied to speak on anything except surface level stuff. But thats not my primary complaint, it is tertiary. My main complaint is that whenever the word 'female' or equvilant thereof it is nearly always in a sexual context and that rings alarm bells in my head. Also stop demeaning every fucking faction with those incessent perverted memes that wont DIE. I think devaluing the Tau only to sex jokes and gundam, as well as slaneesh, in relation to sex jokes, is terrible and has been a disaster for the wider lorespace and newer fans. Uncritically citing lexicanum, and at least, in one case plagerizing an entire page with only the barest of changes, HOWEVER! That may be a false positive on my end and as such will require further research for now it is [BEING INVESTIGATED] The shilling is also insane for videos, with ads, patreon, with an entire store page, you are giving Valrak a run for his polishing dorn's chainsword money. Unacceptable. Being a 'Lifelong' fan does not equate to you being qualified as you still get things wrong, at worse? Misleading, at best? Just marketing speak. Wolf Lord Rho & Valrak 0/10 - Guy's, I understand you are passionate, but stop the shilling, please. 40K Theories [Remleiz] 6/10 - Focused on speculation and Theories, I have barely anything bad or good to say. He exist, he does what he sets out to do. Arbitor Ian 5/10 - I have nothing bad or good to say about Ian, stop getting into fights would one of them because Ian is not cut out for the internet slap fights- buuuuut it seems he has stopped doing so, so good job. The Pontius 0/10 - No, female custodes are not some blackrock psyop meant to make warhammer woke and gay. The only thing you are doing is getting scared of shadows and believing lies.

GW is a company at the end of the day and I am not sorry that you think women as a whole are not allowed in the hobby. Boohoo, grow up. [Version 1.1 Update] If you have any suggestions, arguments or rebuttals, please comment and explain why to the best of your ability. That is all, thank you for your time.

[arsene-ee]

Can we talk about how both Preston Garvey and Wyll Ravengard are pretty much the characters that get treated the worst by their respective fandom? (Also Ik I'm being incredibly Biased here because I love both of them dearly)

Cuz like both tend to be called incredibly bland and are often times just overlooked. While both of them are incredibly complex character (as complex as a bethesda character can get in Preston's case)

Preston is consitently the butt of the same boring ass Joke. "hAhA aNoThEr SeTtLeMeNt NeEdS yOuR hElP, hAhA sO FuNnY" and yes I get it the line is incredibly repetitive, but every characters' dialouge gets repetitive with time as well. The reason this line is so repetitive is that Preston is pretty much the only Questgiver for the Minutemen for a huge part of the game, while other factions like the Railroad (and I assume the BoS) have multiple characters that give you quests. Lorewise Preston being the only quest giver for the minutemen makes sense due to him being like one of the few survivors and all (and the other characters wouldn't really make sense as quest givers, well maybe sturges but he's busy hammering the walls).

Preston has so much interesting lore if you take the time to listen to him, He feels so much survivor's guilt about what happened in Quincy. HE BELIVES HE DESERVES DEATH FOR GODS SAKE.

And I'm still so upset about how he's treated by the fandom, although I do mainly blame bethesda's lazy ass writing. (Also let's not forget that X6-88 is often completely ignored)

Now to Wyll, the love of my life, my babygirl. Wyll was extremly neglected by Larian's writing with him only having about 8.5h of content according to this reddit post. which probably has a lot to do with the fact that he was rewritten very close to release. Wyll is not boring, Wyll is not bland, Larian just didn't want to do him justice compared to other characters (Cough Cough Astarion Cough Cough 12.75h of Content Cough Cough) due to the response to him in EA being low. And let's not forget that up until Patch 7 his dialouge was bugged (apparently), it shouldn't have taken this long to fix it, but Larian was probably busy Animating the 1000000th Astarion cutscene (And don't even get me started on the racist white guy). Wyll didn't even get his own outfit like the rest of the Party (well Lae'zel is wearing Typical gith armor but you rarely encounter them, I recall like 3 or 4 times you actually wearing that armor) Wyll got the basic ass Warlock outfit, and yes it might make sense if you put it as "Well Wyll doesn't have anything anymore, he probably bought or got what was quickly available" well yes but then Astarion should wear some rags or something or at least more plain clothes cuz Cazador most likely would not pay for his clothes to get fixed or get fancy clothes for him, it was just Larian neglecting Wyll again.

And just like Preston Wyll is an incredibly complex character if you take your time to get to know him. His pact causes him pain (mostly mentally n all that) it got him disowned yet he doesn't regret taking it. Wyll was a menace of a Child, almost accidentally robbing a bank, reading smut when he was too young to read such content and then during the game reciting that shit in public. He is incredibly corny and he is proud of that and he fucking fangirls over Minsc. Wyll doesn't even hate his father for disowning him (I'm not saying Wyll should hate or forgive his father, I believe their relationship is incredibly complex), he only speaks rather fondly of him. (also if I see one more person stating Wyll is a Tiefling/Modding Wyll to look like a tiefling I wyll throw hands, he is not a tiefling he is touched by the hells. Same goes for the damn bloodstone eye mod, it's not supposed to be a bloodstone bbg lies about it). Wyll has been under Mizora's close watch for 7 years of course he wants to take romance slow.

Unfortunatley in both offical art and fanwork Wyll tends to be replaced by Halsin or straight up forgotten and in the offical art he does appear in he is often just glued to Mizora (yes I get that a Warlock pact is Binding blah blah) like in the offical art book where every character's alternate design is shown, just not Wyll instead it's Mizora. And I hate it, yes someone may percieve him as bland/boring when they just put him in camp and just don't interact with him, hell if that was a reason to call a character boring I could call Astarion boring but I'm not.

I understand that "good" characters might not be everyone's cup of tea but holy fuck it sucks so much that all the characters I like are just ignored.

The main difference between Preston Garvey and Wyll is that Prestion is the butt of a lame joke and at least is somewhat acknowledged within the fandom, while Wyll just tends to fall behind (Just like X6-88). Both of them are overshadowed by other characters in the game. Preston, Wyll and X6-88 are all pocs and all of them are overshadowed by/less popular than white/white read characters. it's honestly exhausting to see, especially for Baldur's Gate 3, when I see that Larian does indeed respond to fan complains in their content ("Fixing" Tav's expressions for Abuser Astarion kisses...dark romance has ruined fandom).

There is nothing much there can be done about Preston's lazy writing since fallout 4 is pretty much ancient by now (it's like 8 years old so almost a decade). But Baldur's Gate 3 has only turned one (1) year old recently and modern games get consistently updated, it would not be hard for Larian to just add more content for the characters that have less content and make the amount of content each character has kind of equal, hell I would write them the Wyll content for fucking free.

This casual racsim in fandom spaces, whether it's intended or not, is scary to see especially with the curent rise of right wing extremism in western countries (I'm mainly talking about germany here since that's what I can talk about, actually being from such a right wing extremist state).

[greayworks]

The Yassification of Greek Mythology

Look I'm not going to be one of those "man gets a slight rush every time he tells someone John Lennon hit his wife" That's not helpful and a lot of people who do take issue do tend to also GREATLY oversimplify many Greek myths or act like there is one version when part of the difficulty of talking about these is trying to chase the exact roots given as many of these stories were mainly told orally and often changed depending on the area and culture as well as various translations and history of colonization.

Nor am I saying a writer can't be inspired by the stories and do their own thing.

But my personal issue with a lot of modern "Retelling of Greek myth!" is how a lot of them weirdly lack nuance, even compared to the original source. Was Greek society very patriarchal? Yes but there were still women present and frequent in stories and had different roles.

Most retellings don't really put a different twist on it or explore the side characters' nuance, it's incredibly simplified "This person was actually cool/sad/good and the ones against them suck"

It's the weird Yassification of some characters and mythos that kind of bugs me. Were there queer lovers in Greek mythology and history? Yes, quite a lot actually, but maybe making Ganymede Zeus's twink in your story a bit in poor taste given pretty much his only story is about him being kidnapped and becoming Zeus cup bearer between the ages of 16-12.

Or stuff like the Amazons, people like the idea of a woman-only warrior-based culture but just not really acknowledge the actual warrior side and some of the crimes they'd commit and conflicts they'd get into because "that's not fun!"

Complexity is removed from SO many stories, factions and conflicts to have a clear cut good guy who mainly reacts and an atrocious villain whose philosophies seem to be weirdly modern in how awful they are. Making Heraclues a blood-lustful berserker warrior who or a a happy dummy who uses his strength to solve all his problems is really odd considering in his story his intelligence and wit is constantly underestimated by King Eurystheus but he uses tactics and cunning to achieve several of his labors.

Also, the enlightened Chad angelic Athena and the angry evil demonic Ares in a lot of media is really funny to me because the only thing that makes Athena more positive is her description. "Goddess of Wisdom" sounds really nice but it's still referring to warfare.

Ares is described as wrathful in a lot of stories but that being his only trait is very odd to me when he's a much more nuanced figure than that. Instead, he's a red-pilled dummy in most stories now because he has a different descriptor than Athena.

It's a sign of lack of curiosity of searching for other myths or stories to adapt because people already know of these.

[chrismerle]

so, like, I am perhaps a little overly-protective of Veilguard, because I am genuinely very fond of it and a LOT of the complaints I see about it fall into the following categories:

'I am bitching about things that have been present since Origins, but I am very conveniently only taking issue with them now and acting as if they are unique to Veilguard'

'I am bitching about things that I claim haven't been addressed/explained, except they actually have, they just aren't super relevant to the main plot so Varric or Solas didn't turn to look at the camera and address it to my liking'

'I am bitching about how the game is messy but conveniently acting like it's UNIQUELY messy when in reality Dragon Age as a series is a goddamn mess'

'Taash is blunt and kind of awkward but seems largely unbothered by their own bluntness and awkwardness. I find this to be an unpleasant trait and anything I find unpleasant in a person is bad writing.'

'I am incapable of recognizing the difference between bad writing/game design and things that I personally just don't like that much'

and I think all of those categories of complaints are fucking stupid, and I wish the people bitching in such ways would either find some fucking whimsy and just appreciate the game for what it is, stop torturing themselves with a game they clearly don't like and aren't going to like, or at the very least have the good manners to stop putting their ass-hurt-y whinging in the main tags.

that said, I do have some legitimate criticisms! I am not just irrationally praising every element of the game.

you can't really talk to your companions in the Lighthouse. there are a few "scheduled" conversations that take place as cutscenes, but you can't just walk up to them and bug them to talk for the most part, like you can in previous games. hell, I would've been fine with the Mass Effect 3 method, where you just walk up and press the 'talk' button and they spit out vaguely situationally-relevant dialogue until they eventually tell you 'not right now, Rook.' but instead you're largely limited to just listening to your companions bond with each other by eavesdropping on them, which is relatable to me because I'm a nosy bitch and any conversation happening around me is no longer a private conversation, but isn't really what I was hoping for.

I don't think Minrathous and Treviso should have both been facing the exact same threat. like, I can buy that a merchant city with a couple handfuls of assassins and no army could be brought low by one dragon. but if the militarized techo-mage capital of The Country Where Everyone Does Dangerous Magic can't hold off ONE DRAGON then that is no longer a me problem. the excuse that was given was that it was circling the city from the air, raining death from above, but the archon's palace is its own long-range weapon, and most mages are also their own long range weapon. Rook rocking up with two additional fighters should not have been required to turn the tide in Minrathous against ONE DRAGON. Minrathous should have been facing a much larger threat than it was.

Varric really needed more ambient dialogue. I guess the devs didn't expect you to actually poke your head into the infirmary that often? 'cause the poor guy only seems to have like five canned responses that he gives. and as funny as it is that 90% of the time he was asking me when the last time I slept was with deep suspicion, it got a little old.

I ran into some audio and camera weirdness. with audio, it only ever happened with banter while running around, not in cutscenes, so I don't think it was my headphones. voices would get really crackly suddenly. and for camera, it wasn't, like, game breaking, but the camera did occasionally just whip itself around to face the opposite direction with no input from me. mostly when I started using the long range attack, but once while I was shimmying through a crack in the wall.

it's a little weird that Rook can't engage more with/about the faction they're part of. like, my first Rook was a Veil Jumper, but Bellara still had to explain basically everything to him, when it could have instead been her explaining it to Rooks of other factions but having a conversation about it with a Veil Jumper Rook. or at the very least some sort of 'Bel--Bellara--BELLARA. I know how it works.' 'Oh! Right! Sorry.'

and then there are some things I just personally wasn't a huge fan of:

I could have lived very comfortably without ever seeing the Mass Effect 3 readiness rating ever again. but there it is. you have to do ... so many side quests ... if you want to keep all of your companions alive. so many of them.

most of the armor is really ugly, in my opinion. my first Rook spent the entire game running around in the N7 armors (the version without the coat was his casual outfit, since my private running joke was that he only ever had time to take his coat off before he had to go put out more fires). my current Rook has been running around in the brown leather duster coat the entire time. I think it's because they're all kind of over-designed? a lot of them would be perfectly fine if they got simplified a bit. whoever dressed the Lords of Fortune, you need help, most of their outfits are so fucking ugly.

I know it's CONVENIENT when you use the same button for basically everything but the 'interact' button and the 'jump' button being the same means I tried to pick something up and then accidentally yeeted myself off a cliff or into a volcano so many times.

they nerfed my archers, man :( I mean, I kinda get it. I was an archer once in Inquisition and was so over-powered. archers got to be so fucking cheap in Inquisition, especially if you specialized as an artificer. it was great. some of the most fun I've ever had playing Dragon Age was being an explosive archer in Inquisition.

the Inquisitor's class should have been one of the previous choices we could carry over. in general, I don't care that it was mostly a clean slate, but we should have at least been able to specify if the Inquisitor was a warrior, rogue, or mage. let us actually see them in combat at the end.

I ... don't think I really had a point to this whole ramble. I just have a lot of Dragon Age thoughts and feelings and only a few Dragon Age friends, and I can only babble at them so much before I feel like they'll wanna break my keyboard with their brains.

[atopvisenyashill]

do you think bittersteel is actually a homophobe or was that just a weird tidbit in awoiaf that grrm never intended to be canon? if so, i think it's so funny because homophobia in westeros seem to be more along the lines of "We Will Quietly Pretend This Isn't Happening As Long As You Make Babies," but bittersteel decided to Evolve the concept into full-on "Fuck You, Sword-Swallowers Don't Get To Become King."

the real answer is i simply don't think we have enough information on bittersteel, his relationship with daemmy jr, or the relationships within the blackfyre faction in general to really give a concrete answer on this. especially ecause like, "being homophobic" is not really portrayed as a "bad thing" when it comes to propoganda (whereas i would argue some level of being a freaky misogynist is - at a certain point, men like gregor, ramsay, roose, etc, cross a line into violent misogyny that even the absolute insane patriarchal guys in westeros are like "gregor is dangerous for women to be around because he cannot stop raping them" ya know. part of robert's bad reputation amongst the lords is in fact because he publiclly humiliates cersei on the regular. not enough that anyone stops it but enough that they feel it's tacky behavior. no one but the reader and one or two characters who are exemplary for this world are looking at the homophobia satin or laenor faced and going "hey that's a fucked up situation" or at least that's how EYE see it). so it's kinda thrown in there without anyone really delving into WHY bittersteel feels this way, if his words have gotten twisted, if daemmy jr is just feeling touchy (understandable if he is though imo and i'll say this about every single character; being queer in this world is difficult and i think it's fine to have a chip on your shoulder about it). as of right now, imo, it's mostly just up to you to decide until we get just slightly more insight into the blackfyres - and i do think we will eventually get that insight, i think our lack of information on this time period is clearly because george wants to write about it more in depth but hasn't been able to yet.

anyways, do i think it makes sense that one of the leaders of the blackfyre faction, a faction rather infamous in story for being made up of religious reacher freaks, anti dornish chuds, and anti intellectuals, might jump to "gays are too weak to be king" ? yeah that tracks. do i think it's just as likely that bittersteel actually didn't care that much and was more annoyed that daemmy jr's "rebellion" was an absolute mess he wanted no part in? i do think that's equally likely at this point. hell, it could very well be some combo of both!

[lazodiac]

It's time once again to ramble incoherently about magic cards. Lets try and divine where each of the cards of Outlaws of Thunder Junction are from, why don't we!

You can find the first two parts here and here! And today we're covering...

BLACK

Starting us off with a native to Thunder Junction. God this critter is spooky looking. Love it though!

Aaah, the Hellspurs. I'll get more into them once we meet our first creature Hellspur, but for now just accept that this magmatic thread of doom is native to Thunder Junction.

Another native creature of Thunder Junction! Vultures are important and regal birds and shouldn't be so villainized, I think... but I can't deny they do sometimes look this nasty.

While we've seen a number of vampires in magic practice ye ol' Sanguimancy, the plane most often shown to do this (and the plane most likely to pop their collars THIS ridiculously) is Innistrad.

As mentioned with ghosts in the Blue cards, dead and revived means you're bound to the plane- zombies are native to Thunder Junction, regardless of where they're from previously.

Sweet lord kill it with fire! This abomination is from Thunder Junction and if it's not I never wanna see where it's from. Snorses are wonderful an idea but god they look comfortable.

Gonna say something controversial about this one- the way the lady is posing, her culty robe, and the predominance of ash in her fire, makes me think this is a deep-cut to Azgol, last seen in MOM. It's got similar vibes to various Hellspur aesthetic stuff, but the woman is clearly just too alive to be one of them- more on that later.

Okay this is probably the best place to bring this up. Hellspurs! One of the criminal factions of Thunder Junction. Lawbreakers, murderers, and thieves to a man. Each follows the brutal scorpion-dragon outlaw Akul, and almost every single one of them is mutated beyond all belief by the Chaotic Thunder of the plane.

As a result, much like with zombies and ghosts, these guys have fully stripped away all of their previous life in exchange for lava hands and shit. So, there's gonna be a lot of folk who are native to Thunder Junction purely by this metric, and it'll skew things a little. This is why I'm counting the numbers by colour, since the Hellspurs are predominantly red and black.

A natural (and very spooky!) magical mirage of death. I love this art.

See? This is what happens when you don't "lower" yourself to feeding on animals. You end up shoving your stupid ass face into a cactus. This is a Ravnican vampire, since we've seen before they're often stupid enough to pull this exact trick.

*Dry bones falling apart noises* Tinybones' funny trick and/or prank! This is from Dominaria since that wonderful friend is from Dominaria too.

Raised on the plane, native to the plane. This skeleton owns by the way, this is a good ass skeleton.

Gisa Cecani is, much like her brother, one of my favorite characters in Magic. She's Innistradi born and raised, and seems to fit in like a glove on this plane.

Really unsettling art on this one! Ghost, so native to Thunder Junction... though we can actually, likely, identify the body here; four arms suggests a Mirran Vedalkan. Neat!

Our first actual look at the main antagonist of the set (for as much as that means in a villain focused set). Akul, the Scorpion Dragon of Gastal- a fact revealed right before I started doing this!

Kaervek! The Merciless! The Conqueror! The "too big a deal to be dealing with this shit", imo. Everyone's upset at Marchesa being here but Kaervek is the one that bugs me the most- this man is a country-conqueror, not a petty crook!... but, it's fine, because it's clear in the story Kaervek is insulted Oko's recruited him for such trivialities.

Anyway, he's from Zhalfir. I hope he gets to kill Oko.

Swing your partner round and round, rip their corpus from the ground! Gisa doing a barn-raising in the most literal sense, a uniquely Innistradi way of waking up the dead, with a Thunder Junction flavor.

A hellspur bursting his way out of a shallow grave- oak box included. Funny, and native to the plane.

No real way of figuring out where this guy is from or his gaseous death-cloud... so I'll say Eldraine, based purely on the fact that it's the plane most likely to have such a simple burst of "sleeping" poison.

An easy one! He may be a rat man but he's called out as a Nezumi and that's a Kamigawan thing.

There are a couple places this delightful fellow could be from... but given the pickpocketting and the general demeanor, he's from New Capenna.

Azul, laying a horrific waste to his "friends" to benefit. The scorpion claws being a vent for his breath weapon is exceptional a design, incidentally.

A ridiculous piece of art for many reasons, this one is native to Thunder Junction purely by the fact that this is where the gang was born.

The reason why this is ridiculous is because every single height here is wrong. Vraska is taller than basically everyone to the left of her. Oko is using magic to make himself look taller that's literally canon so that's fine, but Kellan? Annie? One's a baby (described as small for his age) and one's a grandma. Tinybones is also probably far too big. The only person here who is the right height is Rakdos, whose height is "whatever height he wishes to be he can change shape depending on how excited he is". Wild shit.

The only plane with actual snakes-for-hair gorgons is Theros, and even then only half of the time. So this lady is from there. Fitting too, apothecaries making booze and poison is within Pharika's perview absolutely.

As fun as it would be to say this is a raven from Dominaria, implying the presence of Omenpaths are allowing the (currently suppressed and trying to fight his way out of Lili) Raven Man is doing some work, naw. This is just a normal raven.

An all-natural undead member of the Hellspurs, double erasing his identity. God dangit.

This being an ASSASSIN vampire suggests New Capenna. It's kind of their jam, you know?

Gisa showing she is more impulsive than a monkey-goblin obsessed with explosives is why this story spotlight (that isn't given a story spotlight tag) is happening. Innistradi magic running wild and giving us a real Train to Busan energy.

A later card explains that the demons that are natural to the plane grant gifts like this, so this scorpions and their soon to be scorpionman friend are native to the plane.

Fun fact; scorpions do just glow like this. Bio Luminescence is fun!

Jana has the exact same vibe (and the same demon-snake familiar) as Elnor from Yuma's story, so I'm calling it for New Capenna here. Also, funny flavor text AND reminder text. Fantastic work.

And that's it for part 1. Tune in momentarily for part 2 of Black!

[civilotterneer]

Hi y'all!

I'm always down for asks! Though I make no promises to have all the answers. I'm pretty sociable so feel free to interact!

I don't really intend to frequently post NSFW, but if I do, I'll always community tag cover it. Please see Tags of Note below for more details on what you may want to mute..

I've also got an alt where I do most of my reblogs so this page can stay clean: @civilotterneerredlines

I've also got a Bluesky that I mainly just repost some of my art on: @civilotterneer.bsky.social

Master list of my larger projects can be found at the end of this blurb.

Wanna know more?

Master List:

Laundry Day - Funny lewd comic about CIv doing laundry

The Search for Civ - Civ has gone missing, how will Lye find him?

Tags of Note:

#uncivilotterneer - horny posting, and NSFW. This blanket terms all directly lewd posts, but may not catch stuff considered only 'spicy' as per the speedo tag below.

#speedo - posts where characters are shirtless or wearing very little, like a Speedo, typically not with sexual intent, but stuff may be a bit spicy.

#sandwich time - the anti-horny post. Send me an ask if I ever get too lewd or horny to reset me and have me post a sandwich render instead of being lower-brained.

#Civ - Civ! My main fursona and primary character

#Lye - Civ's housemate, a cat necromancer

#ask - posts with asks from people

Fun facts:

I am a practicing civil engineer-in-training. I originally got a degree in environmental engineering, but civil speaks to me more now (they're very similar degrees so it's in fact possible to switch post-college). I'm focusing my work in wastewater and water treatment, with a healthy amount of site grading and water/sewer pipe networks for the city.

I swim just about every day I can, which is pretty close to daily. Thus my fursona's an otter to reflect that. Plus I'm just a silly little guy sometimes.

Ich lerne Deutsch, aber Ich bin nicht sehr gut.

I enjoy tabletop games a ton. Big fan of DND/Starfinder and I'm currently running a Starfinder campaign. I also play a bit of MTG, but more often I play Star Wars Armada, which I paint and homebrew for.

I have 2 3D printers, one FDM and one Resin. I'm typically printing game pieces for Armada, which a roommate and I are currently using to make a Star Trek, UNSC, and Covenant faction for the game. I also 3D print mini's for DND, and my roommate group paints them. The FDM is the favorite child, though its older so maybe that's unfair. (I'd like to note that she's now in her rebellious stage and tends to malfunction more now. The resin's now the grade A student)

I've got two pets: one's my mutt Lady (she's a rez mutt with mixed aussie, german shep, sheep dog, herder, and about every other breed on the rez), the other's my snake Striker (lesser morph ball python).

Base model originally by https://x.com/GalileoGB?t=A570ht3M6JPpeOog-Rn3Kg&s=09

Ref Sheet (Not updated for model changes):

[calebwittebane]

also, finished my new vegas campaign. Leigh Has Achieved Her Mission or at least the closest approximation of it that the game let me achieve, which of course is the independent ending with a full securitron army and the support of the followers of the apocalypse. the only thing is i Fackin Forgor to deal with the fiends so they caused some problems but well the trouble they caused was to the ncr so i kinda dgaf. also i was surprised some khans showed up to help me at hoover dam! i actually felt kinda bad about it like no no... ive got this... you guys have been thru enough... you shouldnt have to protect the ncr from Anyone even the legion... please oomfies stay safe....

i think some of the remnants died??? idk only cannibal johnson was still with me at the legates camp. did they die?? im so sorry arcade i think theyve died. idk how. they were in power armor shooting gods lightning at enemies. whyd they die but boone didnt. boone was with me the whole time partially because earlier he was helping me with the kimball speech mission (which btw was the most awkward thing ever. love the uncoordinated animations and the crowd of 5 people. the speech that was impossible to understand like wtf is that guy saying. topped off with every npc involved getting locked in combat/fleeing at the end. love it) and i thought hed have fun with this too. well he did and he also had fun picking up rifles off of every legionnaire corpse. why does he do that. i check on him see his carrying capacity looks weird and there he is holding 8 rifles. boy drop it. drop it. now.

anyway. i kind of dont understand what happened with the brotherhood of steel, i think i had confused the game badly. i became besties with them rather early on, i even convinced mcnamara to let me join them (which like. youd think thatd have some curious implications but again, Unfinished Game) but i never talked them into making a truce with the ncr or anything. but for some reason i told mr house i did? like right before i decided i would Not be Trying The Mr House Route after all, a decision i made specifically over his insistence that i eliminate the brotherhood actually. and then yes man also acted like the bos were gonna help the ncr at hoover dam. and mcnamara kept saying he couldnt believe he would be helping the ncr even though again the subject had not once been breached. i was like ok. and then they did not in fact help the ncr. they didnt show up. wtf was that about. lies and treachery. after all i did for you. after i fixed your air conditioning. oh im sorry, was it the robots. did you not like the robots? scared of them?

and not only that, the boomers also didnt show up even though they were supposed to. motherfucker... what did i get you bastards that airplane for... you people were so annoying and unkind and i still helped you. because i thought i could count on you. for everything i did for you. loyal i hope your solar arrays break immediately. that guy who works with loyal idr your name i hope your gf breaks up with you and then you explode. i hope all of you explode. i shouldve known. i shouldve known better.

like thats so funny. of all the factions that i had recruited the ones that actually showed up to help were 1. The Elderly Ex-Soldiers Of The Horrid American Regime 2. the great khans, Unexpected And Unannounced. oh well. we still mowed through those bastards. thats right. thats right. all you centurions and other creeps, you stood no chonce. no chonce against this hungry hungry woman. she ate caesar, shes gonna eat all of you. thats how you deal with enemies and opponents and adversaries.

as for legate lanius i fully buy into the Legate Lanius Isnt Real theory. i mean yes ostensibly theres a guy, whose name Allegedly is lanius, and hes a legate. but hes just a propaganda figure. legate lanius The Cruel Merciless Force Of Destiny Itself, The Devil, Unpredictable, Cares For Naught But Victory, with all those crazy stories of how he became part of the legion. well thats not real. hes just a tall guy in a scary mask and he doesnt really wanna be here. like the fact that you can just talk him into retreating. like hey man this campaign has already cost you your leader and youre gonna keep having a bad time around these parts. take that taste the pain. and hes just like Yeah ok Theres wisdom in what you say Youre a worthy opponent indeed. Goo Bye Bye. and sprints away. ok. scariest guy east of the colorado river you guys. had to stay holed up in the little baby camp away from any fighting until the last big battle and even then he didnt leave the aforementioned little baby camp. he wasnt leading anything or anyone. he was in his tent scared and fingering himself. scram.

felt kinda bad throwing general oliver off the dam. it was an impulsive decision and i was like man i shouldnt have done that. i barely knew the guy. kind of a gruesome way to go. sure he pissed me off and was overall a bad person but i shouldnt be doing shit like that. doesnt inspire others' confidence in my Collected Trustworthy Nature. i think.

im really glad about the good endings i got for all my companions. they just all got really chill ending slides. theyre all just kinda hanging around the mojave helping people and being cool. arcade status: chillinnnng 👍 boone status: chillinnnng 👍 cass status: chillinnnng 👍 lily status: chillinnnng 👍 raul status: ghost cowboy. veronica status: chillinnnng 👍

anyway. i had fun. and so, this concludes the epic tale of Leigh The Hungry... Leigh The Water Drinker... Leigh The Devourer Of Armies.... Leigh The Hacker.... Leigh The Dubious... Leigh The Thief.... Leigh The Sleeper, The Taker Of Naps. and what a journey it was. in a perfect world women like her would not exist. but this is not a perfect world.

[anonthefold]

When I originally got into 40k the only faction that appealed to me was Drukhari because they reminded me a lot of the Drow. Now I have every 40k iteration of dagger ears, a substantial amount of Death guard, even more Chaos Space Marines, and my favorite is Chaos Daemons (they are just funny little guys c'mon). That doesn't even include the 3 AoS armies I have that will forever collect dust because no one plays AoS around here which includes a fully painted Nighthaunt army that I am especially proud of.

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

GODDD YOUR BRAIN. a lot of what you said is stuff ive been thinking about for literal years and esp now with my most recent playthrough of 1 and 2. the video was great and i also found a pdf for orientalism that i will be picking through as i have the time for it. ive had a post in my drafts ive been working on for a few days. specifically about how the crimson raider leadership (excluding moxxi and including the vault hunters) is comprised entirely of corporate settlers and how that still absolutely fuels their ideology when it comes to the bandit clans. tannis, zed, and pierce are all dahl, marcus has been both siding every conflict since the beginning of mankind, and roland and the ENTIRE military force of the crimson raiders (excluding the vhs) are atlas leftovers. and ofc its seen as necessary because there needs to be bodies between them and hyperion so every injustice against the planet is forgiven. its hardly even mentioned. even moxxi, who is pandoran born, profits in just. outright massacring the population with her fighting rings. (the underdome was sponsored by every corporation, including the shield manufacturers.) the desire that the raiders have to protect pandora just feel like protecting the. thirty or so people who live with them because everyone else is seen as not worthy to the point where mass execution and displacement is encouraged. im not going to talk about bl3 because im a bit rustier on it at this point but in FFS thats an issue brought up at the very start of the dlc: the crimson raiders are losing power and arent needed anymore because jack is gone. like they arent doing any great help to the planet. theyre not even wanted by the end of 2. side tangent but the two things that stand out to me the most on first thoughts are: destroying the eridium mine supplying sledges men in one (after already killing him and half the settlement) and doing straight up environmental warfare in 2 when freezing out the bloodshots. its just unnecessary cruelty. im sorry for taking so long to type this out i have. untreated adhd 😔

No no no it's okay speak your mind!!!

Also some additional things I didn't have the place to say in my answer:

One, you could very easily interpret bl1 and particularly bl2 as an extended metaphor for American destabilization and subsequent media treatment of the Middle East. Except Gearbox themselves is parroting the in-universe perception of Pandora as a "barren wasteland where nobody lives", i.e. the myth of terra nullius. Despite all evidence to the contrary.

Two, 2 specifically has an anti-colonialist narrative. Handsome Jack is a colonizer and you oppose him. But within this opposition is a DISTINCT subtext of "yeah he wants to kill off the bandits of Pandora but he also considers the Normal People, like Salvador and your friends to be bandits!", not "bandits are also humans with dignity". I'm not sure if the former is the conclusion the writers want you to arrive at, but it kind of feels like it.

Three, if I remember correctly the first time a tink (xenohuman/mutant) was not presented as part of the subhuman orientalized faction was fucking New Tales. And I think there was one in Debt or Alive as well (including a tongue in cheek joke about how calling your enemies slurs is kinda bad actually). Yet again, either the writers can't comprehend someone disabled in a not-"cool scifi" way being human, or the Borderlands universe has ridiculous amounts of ableism and baseliner supremacist (can you tell I love Rimworld's terminology for this sort of stuff) sentiment. But homophobia isn't real so that's funny haha right guys??????

As for 3... yeah there isn't much there. Ellie tells us that Pandora has been drained of all resources, Tyreen tells us what I already addressed, fucking Vaughn man. I'm sure I could say smth more coherent on all that but I can't rn, brain fried.

Then there's the Looters and Frostbiters and Devil Riders, who for gameplay purposes are reskinned bandits for the DLCs, but they aren't stated to be bandits for... what reason exactly, aside from geographic isolation (all the other bandits across the galaxy are universally homogenized so...)? I mean, frostbiters even associate into clans like bandits do...

And I do highly suggest you read Orientalism, it's a foundational text in post-colonial studies for a reason, but I find that it also applies incredibly well to media analysis :)