#I had no conception of what the bone monster looked like when I was reading it

[nina-the-ninth]

If I get the motivation I’ll do the whole chapter

[penny-anna]

i have other things to do but here we gooooo owl house fic recs:

Autism to Autism Communication by Polyhexian

"I understand sarcasm," Hunter said, sounding offended. He crossed his arms. "You didn't do the voice thing." Darius stared at him. "The what?" Hunter put his arms in the air and gave his hands a sarcastic little wave. "I GuEsS I'LL hAvE tO sToP cOmInG oVeR, tHeN," he said in the most over the top and comical parody of sarcasm that Darius had ever heard in his life.

everything by this author is great & this one is a joy and a delight!!

Extant Species by Polyhexian

She'd been called a monster more times than she could count, but she knew what a real monster looked like.

i'd happily rec a bunch of polyhexian's stuff but this lil vee & hunter fic was a highlight. especially enjoy the part where hunter's advising her on how best to go about murdering him. love that for them both!!

Owlet by Polyhexian

"Eda!" Hunter yelled as he shouldered open the door and Hooty cooed and rambled at him, "I need help with my potions homewooooooaaaat the HELL is that?!" Luz looked up from where she was sitting on the couch and reading what appeared to be a romance novel about werewolves. "What is what?" "That!" he yelled, pointing at the hulking behemoth curled up in the middle of the room in a massive pile of blankets, pillows, and stuffed animals. "Is that the owl beast?!"

& 1 more!! short n sweet n cute

With Clay and Star Scraps by SiryyGray

Hunter decided to do some research into Grimwalkers. First discovery: Grimwalkers were outlawed in every city under every rule as far back as the history books go. Second discovery: Grimwalkers have no natural means of death. Third discovery: there’s a caveat to that second one.

some absolutely brutal grimwalker content. SPOILERS: hunter can't outlive belos.

Intrusion by rayrock

'He drops something in. It moves and writhes, but it is clearly exhausted. “Eat,” is all he says, voice barely above a whisper. But it is a demand nonetheless, intimidating enough to send shivers down her spine. She hisses in protest once more. He tucks the notepad and pen into his cloak and pulls out a staff. It unfolds and glows a bright red. He does not say anything more. He is nearly always silent when she sees him.' Or: Vee and the Golden Guard’s relationship is complicated, but it is there

some more vee & hunter content for you

just a little bit left by prodigalDaughter

The first time Darius had seen the new Guard unmasked, the fury and betrayal had risen in him like floodwater, bubbling and steaming out of creeks and sewers. Creed had never told him he had a son. —— Hunter has discovered what he is, but he’s not the only one who has to grapple with assumptions made about his origins.

hey remember the other day when i was talking about 'what if darius thought hunter was the previous golden guard's son'! well here u go someone wrote that fic

Wild and Wandering Cries by PorcelanaRota

So his uncle goes flying into the wall directly above him and he is unable to dodge. And his uncle, who is now more palisman curse slime than he is flesh and blood, splatters on the wall, on the ground, on him. Hunter’s been in hundreds of life-or-death situations. He’s felt real and true and visceral fear that sank into his bones and marinated into terror more times than not. Still, nothing has ever left him so shocked and horrified and just flat-out scared that time has actually stopped.

belos splash zone? belos splash zone.

mistakes (the thrilling saga, in high definition) by quynnyah

"This," Amity says, "is not normal human behavior." (Or: Amity and Hunter volunteer to help Camila on a grocery trip. It goes about as well as expected.)

some banging amity & hunter in the human realm stuff for u

Notched by angelcloves

Belos removes the ear tag from his newest Grimwalker.

tiny wee fic giving a backstory for Hunter's notched ear. i rotate this concept in my brain all the time. absolutely twisted.

There is no open window, but the floors still creep by theprincessofdenial

On Tuesday, they eat Chinese. On Wednesday, Camila once again doesn’t have the time to cook, so pizza it is. On Thursday, she wants to make a proper dinner but there’s a hold up at the clinic, Luz knocks over a shelf, Willow has a wardrobe emergency, and then Amity’s cat goes missing. And Hunter beats Gus up so badly the boy ends up bleeding, so there’s also that.

hgnnnh i would rec this entire series if i could (it's 14 fics totally 200k total). its all so chewy i want to get my teeth into it and rrrrrrrrrr. ANYWAY this is my no 1 fav i've been back and re-read it about 7 times. love the Camila Noceda POV; the way it captures the chaos of all 6 kids in the house and makes it feel so real & vivid; the absolutely brutal Hunter characterisation. if ur a Hunter fan go read this right away.

Distance by theprincessofdenial

For the first minute, they all just stand there in silence and watch the airship slowly disappear beyond the horizon. Even though they’re supposed to react quickly, the cold still comes as a shock. It takes some time for the reality to settle in and for them to realize how useless everything they have brought is going to be when their marrow freezes. Hunter hears some of the Scouts inhaling sharply after they approach the ledge and look down. They turn around, unsure where to start, and they shuffle their feet in the snow (terrible decision, really, this way their boots are going to get wet even quicker). Hunter’s the first one to break the silence, and oh, he does it with style. He has been rehearsing that line for a week. “See you at the bottom, suckers!” he exclaims as he pulls out the staff and disappears in a flash of red light. (or: The Obligatory "Leave Everyone at the Top of the Mountain and See Who Makes It Back to the Bottom Alive" Fic. With a splash of Steve)

2nd rec from this series. exactly what it says on tin. *banging pots together* you like whump come get your whump i ADORE what this author does w Hunter. also Steve is there (whump for Steve!!)

A Potter's Field by theprincessofdenial

The view from the staircase is, well, not stunning, that’s definitely not the word. It’s just that “view” is supposed to be accompanied by “stunning,” and Luz can feel her brain coming to a screeching halt and refusing to process what they’re seeing. It's skeletons. Come on, they both knew it was going to be skeletons. The entire Isles know at this point. (Or: despite what the stories would have you believe, in the aftermath, there are things to deal with. Those things include ruined infrastructure, electing new leaders, and prosecuting those responsible for the old regime. And apparently, also Grimwalker mass graves.)

& third and final. unbelievably chewy post-canon fic. lets get into the reconstruction of the isles in full detail. goes hard as hell. will sit in my brain for a long time i think. cannot rec this enough.

and rats all for now!! i got a bunch more stuff in my 'marked for later' so watch this space

[maladaptivewriting]

marauders era characters and their favorite movies

if they lived in the muggle world circa 2024

remus: little miss sunshine brutal and disturbingly human, but intertwined with themes of love, family, support, and healing

james: talladega nights the theme of this movie is that friendship is magic. you know james was saying "if you're not first, you're last" for years after seeing this movie. also he tried to create a shake-and-bake thing with sirius

sirius: howl's moving castle "that howl is so fucking hot" "he literally just looks like you" "exactly" sirius sees himself as this main love interest (howl) and he sees remus as sophie, especially when she's an old woman that howl has to take care of. all he wants to do is take care of remus

peter: bridge to terabithia peter seems like the kind of person to find stories of tragical childhood friendships really compelling. he also loves josh hutcherson (who doesn't)

regulus: the secret life of walter mitty he relates to the main character - a man who is controlled and meticulous but longs to go on an adventure. he also wishes that sirius would pull him out of his monotonous life and into the unknowable but with complete acceptance of who he is.

lily: little women in the way that i feel like i've been shot every time i watch a movie involving complicated mother/daughter relationships, lily would be deeply compelled by stories about sisterhood. especially jo and amy who always feel second to each other

mary: princess mononoke she would relate to the main character and be very enthralled by ashitaka. definitely a comfort watch for her.

marlene: raising arizona or zoolander she loves absurdist comedies with lovable and endearing characters. she is also low-key attracted to nick cage when he was young, but don't tell anyone, it's a secret.

dorcas: arrival or parasite dorcas has unequivocally good movie tastes. she likes high concept stories with heavy thematic writing and devastating plots. she talks about them in detail for weeks afterward

pandora: midsommar and pan's labyrinth she loves movies with comically intense violence. she finds high control groups fascinating. she definitely loves pan's labyrinth because of the freaky monsters and the fact that it sounds like it could belong to her

xenophilius: the twilight saga he knows every detail and loves to examine the story from all sides. he and pandora bond over the fact that carlisle is a joseph smith archetype.

evan: deadpool evan sees deadpool as barty and loves the character because of it. he is also envious of the characters freedom to be himself

barty: the mummy he just thinks that everyone in this movie is really fucking hot

snape: pride and prejudice (2005) finds it super romantic and loves the way characters talk and deliver lines. he listens to the soundtrack as background music while he works.

frank longbottom: spiderman (no way home) no one was more excited than he was when the three spiderman characters interacted. he cried a lot when watching this movie

alice: narnia it was her sexual awakening ;)

narcissa: glass onion she loves a who-done-it story, she reads mystery novels all the time and she thought this one was the most exciting

bellatrix: barbarian or bones and all she watches bones and all like "when is it my turn to be happy?" and she watches barbarian like "what is it like to have a mother who loves you?" everyone thinks she's crazy

lucius: dune or the king he sees himself as the king. that scene where robert pattinson's character is slipping around in the mud and timmy's character is standing there unbothered - that's how lucius pictures himself and arthur weasley. he also thinks of his own family when he watches dune

also this came from a question that @wolfpadx asked in the discord and i just had to elaborate on my thoughts.

[bogleech]

i've been reading through your mortasheen monster backlog and one thing i like is how a lot of the monsters can both look incredibly cute and incredibly monstrous under certain circumstances, like gobblegeist and braek. On a different note, what inspired you to make the boomen?

The Boo Men are actually a pre-Mortasheen concept I had in my teens and they were first inspired by the Gun-Ho Guns from Trigun, which I was only familiar with at the time for its anime dub!

It was the first time I saw a series suddenly introduce an elite team of weird villains with all different gimmicks as a story arc and I just thought it was so fun I started coming up with my own, which included a squad of "mercenary bogeymen," horror monsters for hire, who I name after the prologue of "Scary Stories 3: More Tales to Chill Your Bones"

The "Boo Men" I originally came up with were each themed around a different way to die, basically, so they were like horror movie villain bounty hunters and ranged from simple ones like a slasher ghoul who's very very good with weapons to a sentient tombstone creature that already has your epitaph on it, and bends probability to try and push you towards that death. When I worked them into Mortasheen they changed a whole lot, especially because the setting is already full of odd monsters with odd powers, so I imagined them more like monsters who tried to "become human," which is why they're all strictly humanoid. They are all still named after their main offensive power however and they're still like mercenary bounty hunters.

The first one I designed, Stingg, is also based loosely on a dream I had in which the Pokemon Scrafty got a new evolution that was more like an insect punk girl. The design in the dream was literally just Scrafty with thin claw-like spikes for its mohawk but I elaborated on it a little. I do have some concern that "boo men" sounds too goofy to people who don't know it's an actual archaic way of saying boogieman. Boogieman is a silly word, but everyone's used to it and knows what it means. More than half the Boo Men in Mortasheen are ladies but it's officially a gender neutral designation. Three of the existing ones are slated for the TTRPG's first book, plus a fourth brand new one by another artist! The only reason I don't answer more asks I get about Mortasheen is that every single one has an explanation at least this long

[the-s1lly-corner]

Keep requesting from different people with no luck but what if jason voorhees had a S/O who reads to him when he's "sleeping" in the lake and he has dreams about the story and has a dream of him and the reader as beauty and the beast?

Reading B&B to Jason + Dream stuff!

while this isnt a slasher blog and i am grossly underqualified to speak of anything book related to beauty and the beast, i truly do love this idea + i really felt the whole request thing </3 this aint perfect but i hope you enjoy it regardless! may your other/future requests be answered someday! !!!quick note, admins only exposure to beauty and the beast is the original disney film, they have never read any renditions of it so theyre going off the basic bare bones concept not proof read, i am literally belting this out before i gotta bake an order </3

I could be silly, i could make him dream of himself as the beauty as opposed to being the beast, but im not 100% sure how i would go about writing that.... perhaps ill save that for the next time my slasher brainrot strikes me

i think he would love that you read for him, small little act that helps heal that inner child inside him + it reminds him of how his mom used to read to him at night. its almost bittersweet... im torn on whether or not pam would've read him beauty and the beast/similar adjacent tales. I admit, I'm not sure how many renditions of the story there are, and which ones were around when Jason was a kid but lets say, for convivence lets say she didnt

whenever you read to him hes hooked on every word you say, head in your lap and looking up at you with this sort of sparkle in his eye. loves it when you put on goofy voices for different characters. generally a very calm and peaceful moment between the two of you

so imagine offering to read the story to him, and he is just. totally immersed. even before he falls asleep he sees the parallels between the book and you, bonus if you somehow find a way to show him the disney movie of it

as for the dreams, naturally he's in the beasts position. solitary and secluded away from others, and self admittedly from the man himself, a sight for sore eyes (no matter how much some may disagree), and you as the beauty (not that much changes in the dream, he already sees you as something radiant)

the first time he has the dream he doesnt really say anything about it, actually he doesnt remember most of the dream thanks to him nearly forgetting everything that second he wakes up

but the dream keeps happening, even long after you first read the story to him, and each night he seems to be able to piece everything together

you wander into his home, and he keeps you. protects you, actually. the events of your arrival in the dream are blurred, but seem to line up with how you first entered his life.

theres no talking furniture, unfortunately

however i do wanna say theres talking animals in their place

nature boy

actually, jason doesnt seem to be a prince in his dreams, just a simple man

hes not even a physical monster in his dreams.

but unlike the disney adaptation, when the whole... breaking the curse thing happens, there is no transformation. so hey, theres that at least

he eventually talks to you about it, sheepishly signing the details to you as he tries to not seem embarrassed about it. but he cant help but to get giddy when he sees your smile

"aww you dream about me?" is a comment sure to make his signing pause for a second before he covers his hands over his mask

i wish i had more for this but im on a bit of a time crunch atm and as stated in the authors note my only exposure is the disney film and SOBS

you (making sure hes okay with the nickname first, obviously) playfully call him beast, and he starts calling you beauty

the story eventually kind of becomes you guys' thing, like how some couples have their song or their movie or their whatever

[dandyleyen]

Dungeon Meshi - My Thoughts (Ch1-10)

Each section gets written out as I am reading. Keep in mind that I have finished episodes 1-12 of Cooking in Dungeon and that I have read chapters 27-31 (excluding 28.5)

Chapter 1.

I assume we’ll get info in this later on but I wonder why the country was sealed away in the first place.

“I bestow my entire kingdom upon the one who defeats the magician." - The King (presumably) I know that the anime does get into this a bit more as we go on and that a new king (or queen ?) would be crowned eventually but I wonder why it is that the king (if he is who he says he is) wants to allow his kingdom to be given away. Curious.

Side note, but I adore Laios talking about the dungeon ecosystem and food chain. Would love to seen an in-depth trophic web with different ecosystems of the dungeon. You could also include the factors that aren’t natural to the ecosystem, so like,,, the various races that go into the dungeon and how they effect the environment around them with adventuring and other things. I wonder if there are any concept maps made already for this type of thing. We’re seeing a basic food chain but I want it in depth !!

Laios is very cute, send tweet !

Chapter 2.

I do find it very sweet that Laios is asking Marcille if she wants anything specific to eat.

Laios is such a little weirdo. God, I love him. This was also the first occasion of me wanting to try one of the foods they made. The tart looks really good and I'm currently regretting reading this before dinner :|

Chapter 3.

I had it in my mind that chimeras were like a very specific animal combo, but hearing Laios calling the basilisk a chimera put that into perspective for me. Like,, yeah no that makes sense. Interesting.

Chapter 4.

Marcille and Falin on the front page :( Guys.

The episode for this was a rough watch for me because of how Marcille was getting treated tbh, and it's similar now while reading but I did feel more with the show. I get the concerns that the party has, because they need to hurry (mind you, Laios literally holds them up down the line with the painting stuff in the other level), but implying she is already being a bit of a burden by saying she'll be "more of a burden" if she collapses is,,,, not Chilchuck's best moment.

"Not being useful to anyone makes me feel so lonely..." - Marcille I liked her already leading up to this but this was one of this things that got me to latch onto her so quickly. I do appreciate that Chilchuck did initially go to apologize for having called her a burden, and that Laios pointed out that everyone was useful in the team but with different strengths. Them :(

Chapter 5.

Chilchuck fighting for his life and trying not to get his shit rocked by the traps going off is incredibly funny and I feel for him. My neurotic little guy,,, love him.

Laios wanting to take the bones home is incredibly endearing. Me too, buddy, me too.

Chapter 6.

Touden siblings flashback !! I care about them so much, you guys.

Laios looks so dejected about not being able to eat living armor,,, what a freak /pos. He isn't wrong though, if you can beat it you can probably also eat it.

Chapter 7.

MARCILLE WEARING THE ARMOR IN THE FRONT PAGE ??? Oh my god . Christ. Not even a warning ? God. Oh my god. I'm kicking my feet and giggling, y'all she is so,, . Christ.

Love that Laios got to discover something that likely no one else knew about just because he was soo hell-bent on eating different monsters.

Downside: I couldn't rock with the meal in this chapter. Too... mollusk-y. Mollusks freak me out.

Chapter 7.5.

Ohhh this is everything to me. Monster biology !! We get to learn more about how monsters are seen and spoken about in-universe. I adore this. I can't remember if the anime shows any of this section, but I think it's an incredibly fun part of the world-building. It makes it feel real.

Chapter 8.

This is incredibly nitpicky but it's a little annoying when people use "symbiotic relationship" to ONLY mean a beneficial relationship on both ends. Chilchuck asks if the vegetables act as parasites to the golems and Senshi says that it's the opposite and then proceeds to call it a symbiotic relationship because they help one another. He's not entirely wrong, but symbiotic relationships include parasitism ! Mutualism (the relationship between the golems and the vegetables), commensalism, parasitism, and competition are all symbiotic relationships. Again, incredibly nitpicky but this always bothers me.

"It's a crime to tamper with magical creatures without permission" - Marcille Girl,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, don't even talk about crimes rn when you know damn well what you're getting up to in your free time*

On another note, I love how we learn more about Senshi's motivations in staying down there and all he does to protect the ecosystem functions.

Chapter 9.

One of the first signs, to my knowledge, that the dungeon is acting strange. The red dragon itself (himself ? herself ? theirself ?) is acting a bit strangely ! We learn earlier on that red dragons aren't very mobile and the characters assume (hope, really) it would be resting after such activity, but here we learn that it's on the move and showing up closer to the orcs. The orcs have pretty much been here the longest and even they see that as odd. Makes you wonder.

The baby orc ! What a cutie. I love that the kid is the one to suggest they share the meal and that Marcille tries to smooth the situation over. I like how fuzzy the orcs are. It caught me off guard in the anime but the fur is a neat touch.

Laios not really considering the possibility of defeating the mad sorcerer and becoming king. Pretty boys are often allergic to thinking.

ALSO, Laios talking about Falin always gets to me :(

Chapter 10.

Is it even necessary to tell y'all that I immediately latched onto Kabru ? I'm transmasc, ofc I latched onto him. Same with the anime. It was funny to get invested in him only to see him and his party immediately getting their shit rocked.

We're being told again that the dungeon has been acting strangely, which is not new info to us but it does help to build a case for it. Kabru points out that he's been told about the dungeon layout changing day-by-day* and the monsters becoming more aggressive.

Ah. Marcille essentially flash-banging the group (and the bugs) is incredibly relatable. I can't do bugs. I cannot and I will not. I know the meal looks incredibly pretty, but I physically would not be able to consume it knowing that it's just,,, bugs. I don't even eat lobster and shrimp due to how bug-like they are. It's bugs !

---- *Asterisks-marked comments are marked because they are points I know that become relevant down the line because I've either seen it already or read about it already. I will wait to get there in the chronology to speak more on it, but this is my way to point out some foreshadowing that I am aware of.

[eddsworld-the-masquerade]

Blog update: “About” and “Characters” pages rewrite 

First of, happy new year everyone! Hoping this one doesn’t end me for good haha. 

As stated above, “About” and “Characters” pages have been updated with new info, character description, sheets and art (which you see in this post). You’ll need to open the blog in browser in order to view these pages. Keep in mind that it’s all subject to change given that the story is still in early development (I wrote down 1/4 of the script plan so far) and I might get rid of things I feel I can’t utilize properly. 

I’m also opening the ask box again, so if the text inspires you or makes you wonder certain things, you can drop your message there :) I can’t promise I’ll be quick to answer and I probably won’t be able to answer all of your asks but I’ll do my best to read through them all. 

Under the cut is rest of the concept art (and some of my rambling) so I don’t make the post too bloated to scroll through:

Edd’s style is still considered “weird” but in a more obnoxious and bold way. It’s screaming “Look at me! Look at me! I’ll have you look my way like it or not!”. I like the silly thought of him coming to embrace larger suits thanks to his sire. It is comfortable! And one of the kind - if you were wondering for what purpose Edd needs sewing skills, that’s the answer :)  

Tord lost his iconic sweater and scarf. I gotta say I wasn’t sure if bare chest idea would work out but I’m glad I tried it cuz heck yeah it did. Love it or hate it Tord doesn’t give a damn 😎   His fake horns are now slicked back which makes him look like a disgruntled kitten lol And I added a belt buckle, it’s a skull being crushed by a hammer (roughly designed after thor’s hammer as a nod to his origin); it carries a certain personal significance too 

Matt style is still inspired by vintage suits and illustrations but customized for personal taste. Like the vest being asymmetrical, or the suit being more “flappy” and with a big cutout on the back. It’s sort of a way of saying “I might be playing by the rules but I do it my own way”. He is ultimate bishounen now and his power is mesmerizing enemies with that iconic anime stare and sound effects (this is a joke, but a joke I love) 

Tom had it worst XD but also I had the most fun with him. The pale yellow parts on his body are supposed to be bone and um...shell...thing...you know when something spends a lot of time in the water in the open sea and you get it out and it’s covered in those THINGS yeah I can’t find the word but hopefully you got my point hahaha. It was hard to keep him as monstrous as possible but also recognizable but I think giving him the monster tom color palette did the job. Also yes he got scales. And the texture I did on his skin is supposed to be semi-transparent...like jello maybe? he’s hideous and a pain to color and i love him lol

I also did this little relationship chart to explain changes in the well relationships in-group! 

[monstrouslyobsessed]

For a concept : A male Palasik/Krasue is in love with a human darling. He tries to hide his true nature but one night, reader sees his transformation (his head ripping itself from his body, his spine and organs following the head). Thanks! —anonymous

—a/n: ngl…i had a bit of hard time taking this one seriously (it’s…a floating head with organs hanging out from the neck. that was…it). because it had cultural impacts in the east, i’m iffy on writing krasue as is. krasue are almost always women from what i’ve read, so i can probably get away with my re-imagining. so this is not krasue but something inspired by it.

still, if my depiction is in any way offensive, please, please tell me and I will either rewrite the whole thing or take it down entirely. 

also, idk how to tag this one because the monster aint dead???? how do I even tag this. help.

—tw / tags: gn reader, horror, gore, grossness, nonconsensual kissing, body horror, teratophilia, exophilia, general yandere themes, sfw-ish.

—featured character(s): the neighbor / the disembodied

Your neighbor was a bit of the dodgy man, but harmless. Every Sunday he’d bring you a plate of his cooking, his smile friendly but looking entirely too out of place with his thick, cotton scarf. Even during hot weather, he'd wear it, often tucking half his face inside it.

You'd...never saw him without.

He had a penchant for wearing long-sleeved clothing too, but his scarf was simply more noticeable.

Still, he was charming and had you giggling at his vulgar jokes. He was just an ordinary man with odd quirks. Your mind would sometimes wandered away from its tasks to think of other things he did, some adorable and other..more inappropriate thoughts to have for a mere neighbor. You mused on thoughts of how he would look underneath his scarf, if there was a button undone on his shirt, if it would be warm and comfortable under there, and what it might be like to run your fingers through his hair.

Or how nice it'd be to kiss him right here on your front porch.

Alright, you might've been drawn to him and his scarf didn't bother you that much.

You took a courageous breath and stopped your neighbor from descending your front steps in time. "W...would you like to eat with me?" You asked nervously, voice wavering slightly.

The man blinked owlishly up at you, before a grin blossomed through his warm gaze. You couldn't see his kissable lips through that damned scarf of his,  but you got flustered just by imagining them against yours. His eyes sparkled with joy as he nodded eagerly. "That sounds very lovely," he accepted, holding a gloved hand to his chest and bowing dramatically.

And that was how your relationship with your neighbor deepened into one of mutual attraction.

Not once had he raised any red flag for you, beyond his strange fixation on keeping his damn scarf on. Even when you'd asked him why, he'd never give you straight answers, fumbling over his words and shaking his head in refusal. You wished you’d pushed him to say something months ago, when you and he became an item.

As sickening, squelching noises rose to your ears and your hands glued to your mouth to muffle all whimpers and sobs from your lips, you wondered that maybe you'd imagined what you'd seen not too long ago. Tucking yourself tighter in the corner, concealed by a bookcase and desk, trembles wracked your body and you let out quiet, hiccuping breaths that popped your ears a little. You wished so hard to cry and scream and slap yourself, to wake up now, instead of dreaming about someone touching your thighs and the back of your neck, or feeling those hands pull gently at your clothes until they tear.

Knowing what you’d seen, that 'someone' was not a man but something else entirely, touching you with two grotesque-looking claws. Bloodied bones and a bit of red flesh still attached, violating you in your latest imaginations. Bile rose, but you bit into your tongue and willed your body to comply.

The noises grew louder, and you shuddered in disgust. It was as if something sticky and slimy was being pulled and pushed around, curdling a nauseating noise that echoed throughout the house. The sound was like a mixture of a wet slurp and a soft squelch. Each time you heard it, your skin crawled. The longer you listened, the more intense the noises became,  and every second added to nausea, twisting your stomach uncomfortably in knots. You wanted to close your eyes and pretend this was all a nightmare.

It was all just a nightmare—

You wanted to vomit.

"—, dearrrr..." A slap rang throughout the hard floor—and another slap followed. You stiffened at hearing your name, your heart pounding against your ribcage, as the strange sounds halted. A movement slapping against wood sounded, and the same terrifying sticky noise followed once more. "...dear, darling, darl—" The voice began again, softer this time, to that same sweet tone you were so used to hearing that it left your body in a quiver and your eyes growing wet again. "—dear..." And then it was silent, and you heard nothing but your own harsh breathing, echoing through the quaint office. You squeezed your tearful eyes shut, your fingers clutching the edges of the bookcase tightly, willing it all to stop. "Oh,"

Horror crept through every inch of your body, chilling your limbs and making your blood run cold, when you realized the voice was inside the room with you. Your eyes shot open the moment his voice crooned into your ears and the urge to scream blared throughout your mind—yet your throat refused to open, as you met a large pair of round eyes, staring unblinkingly back at you.

"There you are...!" His lipless mouth crackled, the permanent grin of bloodied teeth stretching wide on his blood-caked skull. It only made his grotesque visage worse, "my darling~"

You gagged on your breath, helpless as he lunged forward, grappling you by your ankle, and dragged you to his skeletal—no, his near-fleshless torso. Your vision blurred, as tears streamed down your cheeks, leaving trails of salty moisture, as you screamed and kicked at his bony hands. He leaned closer, a sickening crunch of vertebrae—thankfully not yours, snapping as he dragged your body across the ground toward his half-skeletal form. Your nails dug into the skin on his wrist—or what was left behind on his bones when he'd all but violently torn his own skin off in the front of your very eyes.

You clenched your eyes shut, now sobbing, as the disembodied monster slathered his bloodied tongue to lick your tears. With every shift of a movement, he'd bled more on your ruined clothing. You did not want to see his true form, a legless skeletal creature with organs dragging out in a tangle from his torso, fleshy and wet.

His exposed heart fluttered and beat against the inside of his ribs, pulsating painfully at the sight of you and hearing your desperate cries. He licked your cheek, and his tongue was slick against your skin, tasting of copper and salt. It wandered closer to your lips. Before you could rip your face away from his tongue, hard teeth pressed onto yours into a gruesome kiss. A shudder racked your frame, feeling sick, and your entire body seized as his disgusting tongue slipped between your teeth, pushing and pulling as his fleshy mouth forced itself deeper. With his free hand, he grabbed your chin and twisted harshly, forcing you open wider as you tried miserably to fight back—

"I love you," the monster rasped into your ear, brushing his hard nostrils on your earlobe, as his tongue brushed along your collarbone, "I love you," He repeated, nuzzling into your neck as you sobbed and gagged in disgust, trying sincerely to shove him off of your body. He seemed to laugh, pressing his fleshy mouth against your cheek in a disgusting kiss, "I love you—so very, very much.”

You wished so badly you hadn’t seen the abnormalities under his scarf and seen the truth of what he truly was.

A hard lesson for you to learn to never drop by your partner’s house, unannounced.

—end

partially edited as of 3.19.23

[namig42]

The Slayer (Ch. 1)

Hello! I started writing some scenes about my Durge character Vero, and have been excited to share them because I really love her character and the whole concept of a Durge who fears themselves. Please read and enjoy! I've got a couple chapters done, so I'll be dropping those as I clean them up!

Read on Ao3!

Summary: Vero, a lovely high elf bard with no memories prior to being abducted by mind flayers, suffers from a slew of intrusive, violent thoughts that come always at the worst of times. She now has to handle the new power that comes with the Slayer's form along with her dark urges.

---

The night that Vero had been “gifted” with the form of the Slayer, she had been absolutely terrified. When her skin transformed from her elvish complexion into the rotten flesh of the massive beast, she had felt she was going to lose her mind. It was a miracle she didn’t swipe at Sceleritas Fel right then, though even if she had, he would’ve just praised her demonic behavior like the fool he was. It was a waking nightmare, one she refused to relive.

The worst part about the form is that she never wanted it. It was her reward for killing Isobel, though Isobel perished only by accident, not by Vero’s hand. An unfortunate blast of necrotic energy had struck her down in Myrkul’s lair. Vero had done nothing to earn the form, though that damned butler was likely looking for any excuse to return the curse to his master. What Vero wouldn’t give to snap that scrawny little neck, to hear all the little bones pop in her grasp… to watch the blood spill from the gremlin’s mouth as he smiled and thanked her…

No… stop that, you fool. Vero shook her head as she sat in the Elfsong for the evening, watching her companions rest around their large room that they’d taken for themselves. Her gaze fixed on Astarion as he sat on his bed, reading whatever book he had found to pass the time.

She reflected on how she hadn’t had the heart to tell Astarion, her truest confidante, about what she could become now. Vero feared every night how she may lose control and try to hurt him again, and somehow every night he reassured her that he would keep them both safe from those horrid urges of hers. “As I’ve said, I’ve got you my love. You can rest easy, I promise you.” It was that sense of trust and care that made Vero all the more hesitant to share about the Slayer’s form. Before the beast, she believed that Astarion would be quick enough to avoid any bloodthirsty lunges and be able to secure her in ropes or whatever means of restraint, just as he had that first night that the urges tried to attack him of all people. But with the Slayer? What could he do to stop that demon should it possess her and take control?

Perhaps warning him would give him a stronger chance at fleeing, though Vero couldn’t stomach the idea of him being disgusted by this new part of her. She couldn’t help but imagine that even if he had known and accepted her, if he attempted to run gods forbid something should happen, he may still be caught by the monster and ripped apart. Astarion gave her no reason to truly think that he would be repulsed by her new form, but how often does one’s lover gain the ability to transform into something even more horrid than a bhaalspawn? No, it was better this way. If she could restrain it long enough, perhaps he would never need to know. She would face Orin, face the Absolute, and after that, live a life of peace that wouldn’t require any form of killing. Yes… it was that simple, of course. What could go wrong?

Astarion looked at Vero’s pensive brow. She sat on the bed opposite his and her eyes were a million realms away. ”I hope there’s nothing troubling you, my dear,” he said to get her attention. Vero’s gaze snapped to his as her eyes returned to this reality. “No, I’m all right. There’s so many things we’re about to face, one can’t help but wonder what’s to come.” It was true. They had only arrived in the Lower City two days ago. Between fighting the cult of Bhaal, facing Cazador, retrieving the Orphic Hammer from the House of Hope, and so many other trials, there was good reason for the party to get lost in the thought of what the future held for them.

“I don’t blame you,” Astarion responded. “After all, we both have a terribly bloody family reunion waiting for us.”

“Do you think you’re ready to face yours?” Vero asked.

“Hah… I’m not sure. I do know that if I don’t, I’ll never escape Cazador , and that is worse to think about. He must know we’re coming by now. Instead of waiting for him to come after me, we’re better off taking the fight to him.”

“We will kill him, I promise you.” At these words, Vero had moved off her bed to kneel in front of Astarion and placed her hand on his leg. He placed his hand on top of hers and gave it a soft squeeze. “I know, my love. Thank you.” He put a finger under her chin to raise Vero’s lips to his in a soft, tender kiss.

Yes, this is what Vero was fighting for. No matter what may come, no matter how much she feared these urges, she would use everything in her power to keep this party safe. She would protect this family they had made, and especially the one that, since the beginning of this mess, never looked at her with an ounce of terror or disgust, but only fascination, admiration, and eventually love.

[the-everqueen]

Hi! So this first ask is about the concept you have for that X-men monster fic 👀

so ao3 user darthpumpkinspice dragged me down a Pierce/Logan hole and now i've read everything (in English) in the tags and am subscribed to a current fic-in-progress. i need to make clear: i have not seen Logan (2017). i've read the wiki summary and i know what hugh jackman and bhol look like. pero now i'm invested in smarmy Donald Pierce getting the shit beat out of him by a burned-out Wolverine and/or being a pretty princess/fucktoy for Wolverine.

(go read Twice Shy. and then, just because it's good Rose-as-Dream fic, Heavy Lies the Crown.)

anyways. given this context. i want a fic where Donnie gets revived/captured by A-T in the wake of film events and they test a new serum formula on him and it goes...wrong. cue Logan (also revived, and/or time loop shit, we know i love a time loop) breaking him out, thinking he's going to leverage this little shit for info to dismantle A-T, and instead he's got a handful of monster. two ways for this to go, imho: Pierce is turning into something wolverine-adjacent, with all the gross and delightful body horror and fear of losing humanity that comes with it. i find this fun because wolverines are related to martens and i DO think it's on the nose in a darkly funny way if the (metaphorical) weasel is becoming a (literal) weasel. also wolverines are solitary animals (ha) so putting two of those in close quarters and being like "work together!" has great potential. alternatively, Pierce's body is coping badly with a botched metamorphosis into bhol-as-Wolverine, with all the fun pain of "hey bone claws actually really fucking hurt and when not reinforced with adamantium they aren't a GREAT weapon, actually, because bones break," and "rapid healing factor doesn't stop things from hurting, esp. when 'things' are a pissed off adamantium-reinforced mutant who wants to use you as his personal punching bag." either way! i get Donald Pierce Coping Badly With A New Set Of Instincts, and the delicious playground of "what if we took someone who is definitely traumatized and has been masking that with violence and suddenly/horribly reoriented his whole sense of self while making him dependent on the person who wants him dead more than anyone else."

the first option has the potential for a...softer ending. not kinder, maybe, but it could result in some uneasy truce with elements of pleasure. second one is pure whump. for me, the attraction of this pairing is the flip of a hero into a small-scale villain for someone who absolutely deserves hurt. the reparative factor in non-whump versions is the classic "you have been seen at your absolute worst and someone still thinks maybe you could've had kindness, maybe there's something worthwhile at the bitter pit of you." but there's also the bit where it's like: you are Logan and you are tired. you have been saving the world since forever and it has not fucking gotten better and no matter what you won't die, you can't die, you wish you could die so at least you could stop. and the ghosts keep dragging you back against your will, and living so long makes for a LOT of ghosts. and then this bitch of a kid who tells you he's a fan is in your hands, and he's done a lot of bad and feels no guilt for it. and maybe you could make him sorry. at very least you can have this: you can prove to yourself you're a monster.

[what-ive-been-reading]

Harrow the Ninth - Tamsyn Muir

One Sentence Summary:

Lobotomized nun realizes God and his Angels suck so so much.

Did I Like It?

Yes and no. I'm probably not going to read it again for a long while because of the second person writing style. Like, I GOT IT right away and I really did like what it was immediately communicating to the reader, but god damn were the third person "flashbacks" a breath of fresh air. It was like surfacing from my own personal River.

That said, Tamsyn Muir is an expert of her craft and her voice carried me through this book. On my first reading attempt right after Gideon I actually stopped reading for months because I hated the prose. Fortunately, I just couldn't stop thinking about the juicy implications and all that angst waiting for me to crack open and slurp down like so much bone marrow. It was absolutely worth it.

If you're reading the book and you don't "get" or enjoy the second person perspective: just get through it. It'll be worth it, I promise.

This book is so good it makes me feel stupider for having read it. It's like it laid bare all my inadequacies with my own writing. This is a good thing. I think it's still distinctly Upmarket, but it sure as hell isn't Commercial. Many sections are downright Literary.

In short: if you liked Gideon, you need to read it. Simple as.

Would Another Me Have Liked It?

God, probably not? There's a 50/50 chance pretentious teenage me would have thought this was either revolutionary or pretentious. It's kind of both, and that's what makes it so good. It plays it all with a straight face.

I think 17 year old me would've put it on the same shelf as House of Leaves and The Gunslinger. Do with that what you will.

Expanded Thoughts:

THE IDEA OF THE PROSE DRIPS WITH ANGST AND CONTEXT BUT UGH

Undead bees are such a cool concept and I think that it paints what could've been a very boring and samey concept (world devouring space monsters) in a really unique way. Hive structure, colony orders, cooking vibrations, and having your mind fracture when you look at them all works SO well.

Unlike the first book, the humor landed much better this time for me. Again, I still think Gideon the Ninth was funny but sometimes it tried a little too hard. I do not feel that way about Harrow the Ninth.

Much like the first book, nothing here is surprising but that's okay. Some people I talked to about reading the book seemed shocked that I had figured so much out so instantly? Like, I do find that weird but I think it's very much a reader issue rather than a writer issue. Tamsyn Muir doesn't seek to surprise you. Tamsyn Muir hangs the Sword of Damocles above your head and occasionally gestures towards it as if to say "Eh? EHHHH???" while you worry about when it will eventually fall.

For real, just read the Dramatis Personae of these books and you'll figure out like 50% of what's happening, which makes figuring out the rest while reading easy. You have Uno. It literally comes free with your XBox.

I respect Tamsyn Muir's dedication to putting these two kids through the wringer. Honestly? I hope they never meet.

I WAS absolutely wrong about the girl in the Tomb. I thought that was going to be Nona but very clearly that is not the case. Excited to see what that's all about. Surely Harrow isn't going to do anything dangerous. She's so stable. If I came to this series when it was still a trilogy, however, I would have made the same called shot and landed exactly where I intended.

Man this series loves dinner parties. I really enjoy how characters just get to breathe for the vast majority of these books. The action scenes are great and all, but that's not why I'm here.

The book plays with death so well. Genuinely the stuff in the River might be some of the most fun I've had with a fantasy setting in an extremely long time.

When they're explaining why THEY showed up in the River, I picked up on the plan and said out loud "There is no way this stupid poem is going to show up now" but then it does and it works and it was EXTREMELY impactful. Christ what a finale. Ortus, man. What an excellent expansion for a character.

Called Shots:

Have they said it's the Earth Solar System yet? I feel like maybe they have? It's very clearly Earth, right? Did they say it in Gideon and just never bring it up again? It's nine planets, dog. You really think I'll be tricked by the First House actually being the third planet? You made the Ninth Pluto.

Who's Nona? Harrow's in the river, Gideon's where she is, and there are no other Ninth House teenagers. I think we have a real One Body Problem on our hands? Although John could probably fix that Gideon issue lickity split.

The rest of the galaxy is like, normal ass people who are under constant threat from the imperialist goths. Please this would be so funny if true.

[evernkillian]

HP Rec Fest 2023 - Prompts (Day 1 - A Favorite Fic Under 5k)

Standard Rec Lists Disclaimers Apply: Please for the love of God read the tags and Author's Note/s, This is NOT the ultimate rec lists or whatever, the fics below are my cup of tea.

This was originally through Days 1-5 but .. I Rec'ed (?) a lot. So. Per Day it is.

(also I have more fic recs here!)

@hprecfest #hprecfest2023

🍄🍄🍄

1. the monster you (don't) see by Lils_White (@decomposingfungi )

E | One- Shot | 1.8k Words | Harry / Tom | Voldemort

Summary: "Kneel," says Voldemort. And Harry does. (He dreams of blood and bones under his feet. A throne made of skulls. A king made of poison and lies. Harry carves out his heart and eats it, and he’s finally at peace).

2. Breaking More Taboos by Destiny_Of_A_Dragon

M | One- Shot | 3.3k Words | Harry / Tom | Voldemort

Summary: The first time Harry broke the taboo, he’d been beyond starving, with little to no choice. The second and third times were much the same. But the fourth? That’s when everything changed.

3. between the good and bad is where you’ll find me (dancing with him) by funky_at_heart (@funkyatheart)

T | One- Shot | 4.4k Words | Harry / Tom | Voldemort

Summary: Harry's seventeenth birthday brings with it a whole lot of presents, a slow panic about future job prospects and the freedom of finally being able to attend one of the many peace celebrations a certain Ex-Dark Lord has been throwing for two years now.

4. Once a Paw a Time by You_Light_The_Sky (@youlighttheskyfanfiction)

T | One- Shot | 3.1k Words | Harry / Tom | Voldemort

Summary: In which Tom is still Tom, and Harry is a black cat intent on making Tom miserable. Or happy. Who knows? Certainly not Harry the cat who is absolutely just a normal cat.

5. A series of unlikely events by Pseudonymous_Entity

T | WIP | 4.1k Words

Summary: While running through the Ministry in their attempts to avoid Death Eaters something went terribly wrong. Fortunately, Harry is nothing if not resilient. Inexplicably in the past? Your adversary is now your classmate? Sorted into Slytherin? Bring it on. Harry Potter has totally got this.

6. Wicked Rumor by Anna_Hopkins

T | WIP | 4k Words

Summary: Lord Voldemort has just had an excellent idea for how to ruin Dumbledore's reputation. If he handles this right, the old goat will never recover! "Harry, mate, I'm so sorry," Seamus Finnegan clapped him on the shoulder. "This must be so hard for you." Harry blinked. "..What?" It was just Potions, it wasn't that bad. Slughorn was loads better than Snape had been, after all. "Your dad, mate!" Seamus insisted, holding up an evening edition of the Prophet. "Everyone knows now, you don't have to hide it anymore-" "My dad's dead," said Harry flatly. "Voldemort killed him. Everyone knows that-" Then he read the headline.

7. we who walk in shadows black by Evandar

M | Complete | 3.5k Words | Harry / Tom | Voldemort

Summary: The boy looks up, eyes like the killing curse framed by soot-black lashes, and smiles. It’s a cold, wicked thing with far too many teeth to be friendly and far from the attitude Dumbledore is likely expecting. In which Harry Potter is a vicious little gremlin who knows too much, and Lord Voldemort adores him for it.

8. Riddle in the Dark by LeeASherlook

T | One- Shot | 1.6k Words

Summary: Revisiting the concept of boggarts in Snape's Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson, Harry was wholly prepared to face the faux dementor. But what stepped out of that darkened space was something else entirely. A handsome boy with a gleaming prefect's badge and a cruel smile.

9. Whirlpools by asterismal (asterisms)

T | One- Shot | 484 Words | Harry / Tom | Voldemort

Summary: Harry Potter has fallen back in time. He refuses to fall again.

10. rhythmicity by TreacleTeacups

T | One- Shot | 934 Words | Harry / Tom | Voldemort

Summary: In which Harry says Tom's First Words, but does not bear Tom's

11. the best of friends by TreacleTeacups

T | One- Shot | 1.8k Words | Harry / Tom | Voldemort

Summary: There's less than twenty four hours left until Harry has to face a dragon. He's too wired to sleep, too anxious to sit still. He goes looking for something to preoccupy his mind - and discovers a new friend.

[moorishflower]

Oh there's another one of these @iprefertheterminsane tagged me to list 8 shows to get to know me

Heroes - This was the first fandom I was super active in! Heroes was smart, sleek, sexy, the characters were compelling and the concept was really cool, it launched Zachary Quinto's career, and if you pretend there was never more than one season it still holds up AMAZING.

Star Trek TOS - There's not a ton of shows where rampant optimism and hope are the core values of the program, but Star Trek is the OG for that, and that's why it still resonates so strongly with so many people. I remember watching this with my dad as a child.

The X-Files - In a similar vein, I remember watching this with my mom. When I was young I didn't know if I wanted to BE Dana Scully or if I wanted to date her (the answer actually WAS both). X-Files did monster of the week episodes RIGHT. Squeeze and Tooms are still some of the best motw eps from any show ever made. The mythos arcs almost always kept me on the edge of my seat, and when they made a character for you to hate, you HATED that character. No way to poor little meow meow the Cigarette Smoking Man.

Supernatural - Look. We were all there. or a lot of us were. In the trenches. SPN Started out SUPER super good. The Destiel years...immaculate. I watched intermittently after season 5, but I took it to heart when the writers said 5 was where it was meant to end. And they were right! It was a satisfying ending. It wasn't a HAPPY one. But it was satisfying.

Sense8 - This show had EVERYTHING. Multisexual polycule. Martial arts. Trans power. Psychic links. Empathy. Big orgy scene. It was SO good and so smart and that it was cancelled is STILL gut-wrenching.

NBC Hannibal - Heather can have a lil cannibalism as a treat

The Sandman - I mean, obviously my current obsession. I read a good amount of the comics when I was in high school and thought of them as appropriately dark and edgy and goth for me at the time, but the tv show really has brought it all slamming back home again, and I'm much more able to appreciate more nuanced themes like depression and personhood and grief now.

House MD - Combines several things I'm fascinated by: medical procedurals, Sherlock Holmes AUs, weird diseases, and Hugh Laurie. Shows like House are what I tend to gravitate back to when I want to watch something that I KNOW I don't need to think too hard about, but I want to see cool medical or forensic stuff. Bones and Criminal Minds also fill this itch, but House has a special place because, y'know, Hugh Laurie.

I am tired n nauseous so tag to ANYONE who sees this and wants to, I would love to know what you watch and if you'd recommend it <3

[pvffinsdaisies]

Random and specific questions to help develop your OC :)

What is your character’s favourite colour of highlighter to use?

Does your character know their exact height?

If your character were a Beyoncé song, which Beyoncé song would they be?

Is your character more partial to a gonk or to a gnome?

How many ABBA vinyls does your character own? If the answer is 0, fix that mistake immediately.

Could your character go on a 10 hour long rant about the importance of a hairbrush?

Which Olympic (or Paralympic) sport (past or present. Winter or summer) has your character never heard of before?

If they were a mr man character would they be mr grumpy or mr tickle? No other answers accepted.

Does your character own any moomin mugs? Do they plan to get one or more?

Has your character ever owned a “Pink Sands” scented candle?

Does you character use hand lotion every single day?

In 5 words or less, what are your character’s opinions on ikea?

Is your character’s mother currently in possession of a bucket hat?

What do you mean you’ve never considered whether or not your character’s mother has a bucket hat?

Has your character ever visited Canada? If they live in Canada, have they ever visited Poland?

How many Hindu gods can they name off the top of their head?

What is your muse’s favourite Taylor Swift era?

Has your character ever locked themself in the bathroom and cried whilst listening to any song from Eurovision 2016?

Does your character own a highland cow? If yes, what is it called? If no, what would they call a highland cow if they had one?

Has your character ever been on tumblr? If they have I feel so very sorry for them.

What is the 5th option that comes up when you search “Barbie” & your characters birth year. Do you feel as though this barbie resonates with your character?

How many times have they streamed “22” by Taylor Swift in the past month?

Is your character from the city of “Tromsø” in Norway? Would they ever move there?

Do they prefer red or green apples?

How do they pronounce scone? Do they pronounce it the correct way (rhyming with “bone”) or are they a heathen who pronounces it like it rhymes with “gone”

Does your character believe in life after love?

Does your character believe that Pierce Brosnan’s singing improved the Mamma Mia film or make it worse?

Which Bratz doll is your character’s favourite?

What do your character’s slippers look like?

As a form of torture, your character is forced to read a 900 page book of their most despised genre, what genre are they reading?

Has your character ever performed a dramatic and soulful duet of “Breaking Free” from high school musical with their best friend?

Is your character more of a slug or a snail? Neither is not an option.

Does your character actually know all of the phonetic alphabet? Do they use it?

Does your character prefer the sims 2, the sims 3 or the sims 4?

Has your character ever crocheted or knitted a tiny Loch Ness Monster?

Does your character prefer to write with black or blue ink?

Is your character’s favourite African flag that of seychelles? If not they need better taste.

Has your character ever competed in the Commonwealth Games?

Has your character visited the county Pyeongchang in the last 5 years?

Does your character find the concept of pineapple on pizza more or less horrific than the concept of banana on pizza?

Is your character an avid listener of the Rolling Stones?

What is the most embarrassing song your character has cried to?

Does your character have strong opinions on eggs? Please do not share them if they do.

Is your character good at telling their left from their right?

Has your character ever owned exactly 3 gold fish at the same time?

[big-wet-cas-eyes]

Welcome to my Destiel fic masterlist for 2022! I wrote a lot early on in the year, and sort of fell off toward the end, but I still wrote 85,000 words this year and I'm proud of that. I'm hoping I can get back into things next year so cross your fingers for me that inspiration strikes!

Thank you to all of my followers (and anyone who has read anything I've written) for your kind words when I do write things, and for sharing things that you liked. Having fanfiction as a creative outlet has been one of my favorite things in the last couple of years, and I'm so grateful to this fandom for how supportive and kind everyone is to a new writer.

Onto the fics!

Longer fics:

life was a willow | 34k words | E

Written for Pinefest with amazing art done by the incredible @betanoiz. I think this is my favorite fic I've ever written, and I still can't even describe how happy it made me to see the artwork that brought it to life. It's mindblowing to me that my story is the reason such breathtaking art exists.

When Dean’s favorite author becomes a regular at his bar, Dean knows he’s done for. He never could have anticipated the intense feelings that blossomed for the talented Castiel. There’s just one thing standing in his way of being with Castiel the way he truly wants: Castiel is waiting for his soulmate. Dean has spent his entire life hating the concept of soulmates. He just wants to live his life without the universe intervening. If the only way he can keep Castiel in his life is by swallowing his feelings, then that’s what he’ll do.

angels roll their eyes | 8k words | M

Written for the DeanCas Reverse bang inspired by an awesome piece of art done by the wonderful @birbgalaxy (and some delightful chapter dividers that make me smile every time I think of them). I don't think I've ever had so much fun writing a fic. It's hilarious, if I do say so myself, and I don't think I would have ever come up with this idea without the art prompt.

The plan is simple enough: if there’s already an angel using Dean as a vessel, then Michael can’t trick Dean into saying “yes.” So Castiel will wear Dean’s body for a few weeks and then leave as soon as Michael is out of the picture. That’s how it’s supposed to go at least.

where the spirit meets the bones | 22k words | M

Written for the DeanCas Big Bang featuring absolutely beautiful art done by the THEEE @wigglebox. I wasn't sure if I would ever finish writing this one, so I am really proud that I managed to get this one out of my brain. I was blown away by the artwork, which really sets the tone of the story.

When Dean and Sam start to investigate a haunted inn, Dean expects it to be just like any other case. But there’s a catch: the resident ghost, Cas, turns into a human for two weeks every year. Before they can move forward with the case, they have to find out what happened to give Cas this kind of afterlife. And more importantly, Dean has to figure out how to honor his commitment to hunting monsters while he’s slowly falling for a ghost.

Shorter fics:

hold on to you | 300 words | T

Dean is in desperate need of a New Year's Eve kiss.

in the refrigerator light | 2k words | T

This is one of my favorite short fics I've written.

Taking a step back from hunting means that Dean needed something to do. Getting Cas back from the Empty was a big win for them, the kind of win that can't be followed up. So he started in on his current passion project: his cooking YouTube channel.

boots beneath my bed | 2k words | M

This is another favorite short fic of mine.

Dean finds out his favorite TV character is bisexual and promptly loses his shit.

ice frozen ground | 3k words | M

Dean doesn't know much about his neighbor. He doesn't even know his name. All he knows is that he’s hot. And that this guy runs, no matter what the weather is. Apparently, not even a blizzard can keep Dean's neighbor from his daily run.

come back...be here | 1k words | T

“Dean?” Cas says. He’s still looking down at the tiny stuffed bundle in his hands. “Is this supposed to be me?” So sue him. He made a stuffed version of Cas to hold onto when he misses his friend.

sunshine on the street | 2k words | T

Dean and Cas go on a hunt. Things don't go as planned.

get in the car | 1k words | T

When Castiel thinks the mechanic working on his car might be trying to rip him off, he does what anyone would do: He calls Dean Winchester.

forty-three pies | 5k words | M

Dean celebrates his 43rd birthday.

holy tax accountant | 4k word | T

Sam refuses to do Dean's taxes this year. Enter Castiel Novak, the hottest tax accountant Dean has ever seen.

[longislandcharm]

PARTIES:@longislandcharm @the-lil-exorcist TIMING: Mid-August, right before this thread. SUMMARY: After being told the Ballards were the ones to go to for ghostly advice, Winter goes to the Bread Cemetery to talk to them. She finds Lil and a deal is made. WARNINGS: I don't think there are any other than death talk concerning ghosts.

Information seemed to be easier to come by in this little town than she had previously thought. It was a little strange that most of the people Winter had spoken to about her search didn’t seem to bat an eye at the idea of her researching ghosts but then again none of them knew she was trying to get rid of an actual entity that was following her around. Still, the fact that she didn’t have to go far for someone who was supposedly knowledgeable on the subject, much less a whole family, was something that kept puzzling her. She was about to find out if the person online was pulling her leg or not though. For all she knew, she was involved in an elaborate prank.

It was warm as she stepped into the Bread Cemetery, Winter shrugging off the thin lace cardigan she had thrown on at the hotel. She took in the beautiful pastries that she passed on her way to the counter and made a mental note to grab a few on her way out. But something more important was at hand and she turned her head back to the person who was manning the front end, only pausing to glance at the ethereal man who had entered the store with her. He kept staring at her with the hard gaze he’d been giving her since he first appeared. Winter let out a huff directed towards him as she walked up, not realizing the person she was about to address might think it was towards her.

“Hi…I don’t know if you can help me but I’m looking for someone by the name of Ballard.” 

Lilian tried to stop a yawn as she opened up another monster sitting idly behind the counter on a stool. Despite herself, she had gotten used to her shifts, and this was admittedly the slow period of the day. She should be doing something, maybe restocking or asking if she can get food for the others - but Lil was exhausted most of the time. She would do it in a little when her bones didn’t feel so heavy. 

She was going to take a little break and read her book   and drink her monster instead until the door opened. Moving the can to behind the register she waited for the other to approach closer, trying not to look too terribly tired. Instead of speaking right away though Lil decided to wait, noticing the ghost behind the other. It wasn’t uncommon for ghosts to be in the front of the shop, although Lil had a habit of ignoring them when they came. After all, most were waiting for Jonas not her - and she didn’t exactly know what they wanted anyway. Still, her eyes glanced over to the man that seemed to be annoying the woman who was coming up to her now. In any case she didn’t think she was here to buy pastries. 

Which was confirmed pretty quickly. “Hello,” Lil said, her head tilting slightly at her last name. It wasn’t particularly odd for people to not know individuals in her family, after all the last name was famous.  “I think I can. You’re talking to one at least. I’m Lil. What can I do for you?” 

For some reason, Winter had been expecting a grizzled old woman or a gruff man who had no concept of manners, much like her, when she found whoever the Ballards were not a pretty young woman who seemed to be around her age. She wasn’t sure if the surprise was written on her face or not but she quickly gained her composure as she cleared her throat. “Lil, nice to meet you. I’m Winter.” Winter took a second to look around the store and make sure no one else was there. Sure, she went on television and claimed to talk to ghosts and she wrote about it online but this was different. She could actually see this one and he scared her. That type of information didn’t need to get out, not with her career and the image she tried to keep. “I was told that your family could help me with some research. I’m looking into ghosts and was curious about a few things.” 

Eyes landing back on Lil, for once a hopeful expression was clear. From what she’d seen of this town so far it seemed like someone could help her with her very strange problem but for all Winter knew she was given bad intel. But she had brought her great grandmother’s book just in case this tip had been legit so she pulled it out of her bag but hesitated to show it to Lil. She would wait to hand it over until she knew this person was who she was looking for. 

“Since someone told me to check in with you, I’m assuming you believe in spirits. Do you think a lot of people are able to see them?” Winter should have come with a list of questions in mind because she was failing to think of a good way to start this conversation. Her mind kept telling her that she was going to be laughed out of town for believing this stuff or once someone found out that she thought she was being followed by a spirit then they would send her to a shrink but she had to start somewhere, right? And she was never one to be shy about anything ever so it was time to bite the bullet. “Because one is following me around and I don’t know why.”

Lil tilted her head examining the other in front of her, wondering exactly what was happening. It wasn’t that she was necessarily weary - Lil was actually pretty good at talking too and sympathizing with clients which was what she felt Winter might be. Still, it was always good to be cautious. Which was proven right when the other asked about ghost research, causing Lil’s face to stiffen for a second before returning neutral. 

She didn’t like ghost researchers - or whatever they called themselves. Most of the time they ended up getting themselves in trouble, and didn’t have any sort of mediumship to speak of. They made her look worse - and while she had given up the anger with that, it was at least a little against the usual code with supernaturals to give information on them. Lil made plenty of exceptions to that rule - she figured people knowing where to get help when there’s ghosts around was never a bad thing - but she was a little put off by how it was asked until the other mentioned being followed around by a ghost. Then she realized what it might actually be about. 

While Lil wasn’t about to tell people how to exorcize ghost - mostly for their own safety as they wouldn’t work without the proper training - she was more than willing to help someone who had a problem and making sure they weren’t scared through the process. 

So, Lil didn’t want to not help, in case it was more of a question about the ghost behind Winter than seeking out a dangerous path.  She was at least more honest than the fake mediums, so with a sigh and a bit of a nod she finally spoke, “I mean if you're asking if I believe in them I’d have to say I don’t believe in air it’s just that they exist. I can see your guy and also the old lady sitting outside on the bench that died I think in 1975?” She could see others around of course, but it was something Lil easily ignored. Unlike her brother she couldn’t hear them, and if they didn’t want to bother her it was pretty easy to let them be.

“Most people can’t see them no,” Lil said softer, trying at least to be a little bit comforting. “Mediums are pretty rare and exorcists are even rarer.  Is this the first ghost you’ve seen? Do you know him?” She nodded to the ghost, not bothering to ask him. It was probably rude of Lil, but she didn’t want to terrify Winter more. “Because sometimes they stick around people that they know. Although, if you can see him you should be able to hear him so you can always ask why he’s following you.” Lil couldn’t hear him in any case - something she didn’t really want to tell the other at this point. “I can answer some of your questions too, but do you want to come back? The Iron and the salt back here will keep him out here - Sorry man but sometimes it’s private business.” Lil said, focusing on the ghost again with a shrug hopping off her stool.

Winter whipped her head around to look outside, now seeing the slight outline of the older lady that Lil was talking about. She couldn’t see too many more than the one following her around and the ones she could see were blurry most of the time but the more she was around her favorite ghost the stronger the outlines were getting. It seemed being a medium was a skill to be worked at when it came to her and the more she interacted with them the more clearly they started to form. “I…hadn’t noticed her.”

The one thing that came with Lil’s answer other than a little embarrassment was the reassurance that Winter was definitely in the right place. This girl could help her. She looked back to who Winter hoped would be a mentor as her eyes widened with the amount of information that was being hurtled towards her. “What is an exorcist? You mean like a priest who takes care of demons?” So demons were real too? What the hell had she gotten herself into with that stupid ritual? “He’s the first one…I think. Is it possible that I’ve seen them before and never knew it? And I don’t know him. That’s the main reason I’m trying to figure out why he’s following me around.” 

Sighing softly, Winter picked the book up from the counter and brought it into her chest. Why wasn’t any of this information in her ancestral book? It was mostly diary entries from her great grandmother but the one page she’d found that explicitly stated the symbols and the chant she’d performed the night this ghost showed up. “He won’t talk to me. I can hear him when he grunts my way, or when he laughs at me or something but he refuses to talk to me. I thought I was stubborn until I met this ass.” She glanced over toward the ghost who was rolling his eyes until Lil mentioned the back room. His head tilted in her direction and Winter once again felt her eyes widen. “There’s ways to keep them away?” Salt and Iron, she definitely had to remember that. Especially when it came to her hotel room. Maybe she could start locking him out so she could get a good night's sleep for once. 

Yes, she was definitely in the right place now and more information could be provided. As long as this girl didn’t go onto any message boards for her show and start blabbing about everything they spoke of today, Winter felt like this would be a huge success. It was a definite breakthrough after falling short so many times before. “I think I was definitely reading the wrong books about all of this. I would love to come back and talk more about this with you.” Being the assertive person she was, she waited for no more invitation before she made her way back behind the counter. Good riddance to the man who hadn’t left her side in months.

Lil nodded slightly that the other hadn’t seen the woman, watching lightly to see if she did focus her attention to where the woman was - and confirming that she did Lil couldn’t help but tick a box. It wasn’t unheard of, that people didn’t know that they were mediums for most of their lives if they were lucky, but just seeing one ghost didn’t mean you had the gift either. It had been more likely that Winter had just messed with something that got a Ghost to cling to her. 

Lil blinked at the question, wondering exactly why the other had come if she hadn’t known she was an exorcist and couldn’t help but chuckle at the idea. “Do I look like a priest to you? No, I deal with ghosts.” Lil was pretty sure the answer was no, most people hardly found her professional let alone Godly. She had to admit it wasn’t the first time she heard that, and she didn’t answer the implied question about demons. “Hm. Have you always seen blurry things out of the corner of your eye? Heard whisperings by people you couldn’t match?” 

At the idea of the fact she wanted to know why he was following her Lil nodded lightly, willing enough to help with that at least. Listening carefully she did wonder what the guy was trying for. Most ghosts were cryptic, but hell Lil would have been annoyed by it too. Before she could say much about that though the conversation - and the person started moving quickly.

“Not indefinitely,” Lil said, not bothering to stop the other moving across the counter and shrugging to the ghost. “He’ll probably be waiting for you after you leave.” Still she moved to let the other into the backroom, not bothering to flip the sign that they were closed. She would hear if anyone came in and she said softly, “If he gets stronger it’ll be harder to keep him out. So I wouldn’t say you should get too comfortable with either. Still, yeah if you wanted a few hours alone a salt line in an unbroken line with any opening will keep you from seeing him for awhile.  Here, take a seat probably not by the oven.” Lil pointed to one of the many stools around for the other. “What book are you talking about? Did you read something before all of this started? Do you mind if I ask you some things to see what’s going on?”

The little quip about looking like a priest only served to make Winter feel more comfortable around this girl. Her lip rose on one side, amused by the tiny amount of attitude behind the rhetorical question. Maybe they had more in common than she had initially thought as she would have reacted the same way. She decided not to comment though, still reeling in her own personality. If Lil was anything like her, that attitude came with a temper as well and there was no reason to test that theory just yet. “Not really whispering but maybe the corner of my eye thing. When I was a kid mostly. A lot of strange things happened when I was a kid but they sort of stopped.”

Of course he would be waiting for her. After trying to ditch him for so long, the girl knew that there was no getting rid of him easily, if at all. It seemed he was destined to be the thorn in her side for as long as she was breathing. Taking a seat on one of the stools farthest from the oven that Lil had pointed out, she situated herself as she listened to the other girl speak about the salt lines. That was definitely useful information for sure. Sometimes a girl needed some alone time. But something did catch her attention, Winter letting a groan die in her throat. “What do you mean by ‘gets stronger’? Is he not already annoying enough?”

For some reason, Winter wasn’t quite ready to give up her great grandmother’s book even if she had it in her hands so she held it tighter to herself when Lil’s string of questions reached her ears. She knew that if she wanted answers then she would have to show the journal to this girl but not yet, not immediately. Winter had other questions she could focus on. “I was reading anything I could get my hands on that claimed to know about real paranormal situations and how to solve them. Not until he showed up though…” She trailed off, her fingers running absentmindedly over the spine of the text in hand. “At least not as intensely as I am now. But none of it is really helpful.” 

If she skipped over the second question then Lil would definitely know that Winter had done something. She wasn’t ashamed of doing a ritual without knowing about it per se, and she really didn’t care what Lil had to say about it in the long run, but something was nagging at her. This book was the only thing that Winter had of her great grandmother and reading through it over the years made her feel close to the woman even if she had never met her. Maybe something inside of her was afraid that Lil would want her to get rid of it. Not that she could make Winter do anything, but even the idea of such a thing tore her apart inside. “Ask away.” Ultimately, she wanted to put it off just a little longer even if she knew it wouldn’t last. 

Lil hummed slightly at the answer, thinking that it did add up that the other might be a medium after all and not just haunted. It wasn’t a sure fire way to know - combing through someone who obviously now believed in ghosts about their childhood and what signs were there- but well hardly anything Lil did was an exact science. “Did it stop or did you stop looking?” She said lightly, knowing that there was a difference. It wasn’t uncommon for Mediums without others around them to want to push out the ghosts - even if it wouldn’t ultimately work. 

At the question and grown Lil shook her head, a little more serious then she had been. “No. He’s not as annoying as he could be,” She said, glancing back to the lobby before shutting the door. She wasn’t sure how far ghosts could hear, so she didn’t exactly want to give him the idea of becoming a poltergeist. She wasn’t sure that ghosts could choose it - something more philosophical than she had ever bothered to learn - but she wasn’t about to risk it either. 

At the information Lil nodded, sitting on her own stool carefully considering what the other was saying without showing too much on anything. “I’m not surprised, although I’m sure there are some books out there that most people could get their hands on that do have facts right - most mediumship things aren’t written down like that. It gets all smashed with what people think it is, you know?” Not that most of the rituals would be helpful to most people. As far as Lil knew, if you weren't Medium rituals wouldn’t work for you. Just like she couldn’t create a potion or shapeshift, you had to be specifically touched by death to tap into anything. 

Still didn’t mean that nothing would come through with a ritual though, it just meant that the chanting wasn’t what brought the spirit - but the fact that someone was opening themselves to them. At confirmation that she could ask questions she started, “Have you had times where you don’t remember where you were? Did you ever feel like the ghost out there was in your head, not right next to you?” 

If she wasn’t a medium, Lil was certain that the ghost would have at least tried to possess her at some point if he was insisting on following her around. “Do you ever feel cold even if it’s warm out? Feel like there’s more voices in a crowded room then there should be? Seen flickers of light in a fully lit room? ” Those would be less commonly known mediumship questions. 

The question stunned her. It was like the girl knew the happenings of her past already and was just trying to confirm. Winter hadn’t exactly been frightened as a child but more pushed into letting things go by her father. “More like…I was forced to stop looking. My father sent me to therapy as a kid and I didn’t like it so I pushed it all away.” With no plans to elaborate on the why’s of why she went, she sighed as she looked away from Lil. Forgotten memories were threatening to invade her mind, memories that she didn’t want to think about considering she was about to be forced into therapy again by her production team and she was sure they would go over them then no matter how much WInter resisted. Right now she was here for the present.

“You’re not someone who elaborates very often, are you?” Pot calling the kettle black there. But Winter didn’t miss the way Lil had shut the door as she answered and she really wanted to know what the other had meant. “How exactly can he get stronger? Should I be worried?” Did ghosts touch people or something? This man had yet to come into contact with her but could he in the long run? 

That seemed to explain why her great grandmother didn’t write much about her own abilities. If it wasn’t common for a medium to do so then how was all of this learned over time? “So, I’m guessing that means a lot of mediums have to figure things out on their own? Is this not a hereditary thing?” That would also explain why her mother never showed signs of actually seeing ghosts. Winter knew that the woman had been faking her abilities since she was old enough to understand but how had this gotten passed to her and not the two generations before her? 

When she’d agreed to let Lil ask questions she hadn’t expected the ones that came out of her mouth. Her eyebrows knitted as confusion took over, Winter not exactly sure what Lil meant. “No, why wouldn’t I remember where I was?” Thinking about her other question, she shook her head to indicate another no. “There’s not a single time where he didn’t seem like just another person standing next to me if that’s what you mean. And no voices in my head or anything, he won’t even talk. Is that like a different ability or something?”

“You saw the shrug I was wearing when I came in, right? It’s not exactly chilly outside. I never really noticed other voices though, not until he showed up. But they’re not all the time and they’re not always very loud. Kind of like they’re whispering.” Why did this conversation seem like it was producing more questions than answers. With the natural curiosity that flowed through her, Winter felt like she could counter each of Lil’s questions with five of her own and she had to resist doing so. “The light thing has happened since I was a kid. I always thought our electrician at home sucked.”

Lil’s jaw twitched slightly when she heard that the other had been forced to stop looking. That wasn’t uncommon either, but it nevertheless pissed Lil off. While she’d never experienced it - quite the opposite type of treatment had happened to her if she was being honest being forced to look into the shadows - she knew that it could mess a kid up. It wasn’t the others fault though so she said softly, “Yeah, It can be scary if you don’t know what's happening. Sorry if I touched something personal.”

Lil raised her eyebrow at that, but it was fair enough to say. She wasn’t used to telling someone more than what was necessary - not because she particularly cared about the secrecy of ghosts or supernaturals- but because once you knew something it stuck with you forever. It was something that could easily worry someone to death and she wasn’t quite sure where on the scale that the woman across from her could handle.  “Worried? No. You’ll be fine.” Lil would make sure of that at the very least. 

At the other questions Lil decided it wasn’t too much at once to talk about them and said, “ It can be a hereditary thing. Most of my family is Mediums, but it’s not only a hereditary thing. Sometimes people are just Mediums out of nowhere. It can also skip around generations.” It was frustrating to not have clear answers on that, but it wasn’t something most Mediums thought to really experiment on. “So if you were born into a family - one that actively practices you probably would have known, but sometimes that doesn’t happen and people have to figure it out on their own or find other Mediums.” 

At her confusion Lil felt a bit of relief and said, “No not a different ability. I was making sure you hadn’t been possessed. It doesn’t sound like you have, and I don’t think he’s capable of that to be fair.” At least for the moment, but she really didn’t want to say that and freak out the already probably on the edge Winter. 

“Yeah you’re a Medium,” Lil said softly mostly to herself and sighed after a moment realizing she was going to have to say more and not just leave it vague. These talks always sucked. “Well Your electricity might have sucked. I don't know that for sure but those are all pointing to the fact that you have mediumship and were just repressing it to - well have less problems in society probably. I’m guessing someone else in your family saw ghosts because you keep asking about hereditary but yeah. That’s probably one of the reasons he’s following you around, ghosts are able to sense us like we can sense them and they - well get attached. Now that its happened though, you’re going to have to learn at least some stuff to keep them from causing havoc around you. I’m sure you have questions, so I’ll try to answer as many as you have. But yeah you’re not being haunted.” It wasn’t a congratulations, not at all. While Lil liked her job mostly, being a Medium wasn’t exactly easy or filled with the glamor that people seemed to think it had. It was limiting and at times awfully scary. Still, she wasn’t trying to imply that Winter was doomed or broken either. 

She shrugged the apology off, not even wanting to confirm or deny if it was too personal or not but knowing she probably did so by staying silent. Those memories were still trying to creep their way in and Winter had to shake her head when the face of a little girl popped into her mind clear as day. She didn’t want to remember her, didn’t want to remember what had her dad pushing her towards something she hated. It was a sore spot and if it had been anyone else who had brought up that part of her past she would not be sitting there being nice about it.

Vague again. This was going to be a challenge in itself. Trying to get information from this girl was a torture in itself and she had half a mind to go grab the ghost she was currently hiding from. But she liked the reprieve from his cold glare as well so Winter was inclined to try and weasel what she could from Lil for as long as she could. She was throwing things at her like possessed and it could be hereditary but could also just show up out of the blue and it was only causing more frustration in the long run.

But it was the confirmation of being a medium that caught Winter’s attention the most. “I didn’t know there was any doubt.” She was almost offended, her tone saying as much, but she had to remind herself that Lil didn’t know her. She could have been that fake medium from months ago just trying to get information for her show so that she could exploit this that much more. Hell, the girl could have seen her show before and known she was bullshitting the whole time. 

She only confirmed that her dad had something to do with why Winter hadn’t been able to do this her whole life. Well, at least by the time she was ten. It made her angry knowing that she could have had this stuff figured out by now, could have actually been helping the people on her show, but she also knew that her father had probably just been scared as well. In the same breath though, Lil confirmed that she would start answering whatever questions Winter had and she suddenly felt like she’d just been let loose in a candy store. This rollercoaster of emotions culminated as she looked back at the book in her hands. It was time to bring it up.

“In that case, I think it’s time I told you about this.” So, maybe he was following her around because he could sense what Winter was but something deep down told her that it had more to do with this ritual. She didn’t know what it was when she had touched it, thought it was a fake incantation that her great grandmother had made up, but after that night Winter had become a believer. She turned to the page she’d used the night her friend had showed up and turned the book to show Lil. “This was my great grandmother’s. It’s mostly journal entries but I found this incantation or ritual or something one day and when I performed it with the symbols drawn on the ground…he showed up. He hasn’t left my side since.”

Lil sighed and said, “If you were being haunted, you might have seen him because of that. It’s not that I doubted what you saw but possession and haunting is different than being a medium.” It would have been easier too. If she was being haunted, well Lil could have solved that. Now she had to be careful not to just get the other on a blacklist like she was. She couldn’t just exorcize the man outside, because well Winter would be on the hook too. 

Lil paused as she moved to show the book she had been lightly guarding away from Lil. Moving so she could look at it and not touch the book she was careful not to read the page out loud. “Yeah that’s a ritual alright, but - huh,” Lil said softly looking at the symbols not quite knowing how the other had done it with no training. It was reckless for sure, but - well she wasn’t exactly going to blame Winter for it. 

“You read this and he came? You’ve never done this before?” Lil asked her eyes looking up from the page to look at the other, a little startled it had worked. “I can’t read all of it, but this is fairly advanced for your first ritual. I also got a couple ideas of what it might have been, and if I’m right - well you got lucky.” After all, rituals could be dangerous and could have disastrous effects. 

She also wasn’t sure how much she could help Winter. Sitting back on her seat Lil said, “Do you want to practice then?” 

That made sense actually, Winter’s bravado dying down a smidge when Lil confirmed that there were other possibilities here. She hadn’t thought she was faking this after all and she needed to remember that Lil was the expert here.. “Do ghosts usually haunt people they didn’t know when they were alive? And do you mind explaining possession because I don’t like the sound of it.” What had she gotten into? This was starting to turn into the plot of a very weird paranormal movie and it was making her uneasy. 

Advanced? Well damn, her thoroughness towards the material she used on her show was coming back to bite her in the ass wasn’t it? She shook her head when asked if she’d performed this ritual before, Winter starting to feel as if she would be in trouble if she told this girl the whole truth. But she wasn’t going to hide things if it would do any harm to herself. She needed to understand what happened that night. “I have a show…it used to be my mom’s but I took it over about three years ago. I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of Spirit Speak…” The medium paused to let the name sink in. Never in her life had she been ashamed of being part of the production but now that it was affecting her she couldn’t help it.

“Anyway, um, when I found this I decided that I was going to include it in the show. One thing you need to know about me is I am a sucker for details and I want to make sure I’m doing things right.” When she wasn’t overconfident in what she was doing and she was dedicated in fooling others into thinking that Winter was the expert. “So, I researched how to say everything correctly, copied the symbols exactly…what do you think it is?”

Practice? That one threw her. Winter had not expected Lil to offer to help her further than giving her information. It was a pleasant surprise and she felt her nervous energy start to shift into an excitable nod of her head. “Yes, yes I would like to.”

“Ghosts aren’t known to be any more rational than people. They pick people to haunt for reasons you might or might not, you know,” Lil said with a shrug. She’d honestly not considered why ghosts did anything, in the same way she didn’t really think about why people did anything. It seemed like a pretty useless thought experiment. At the question she sighed and said, “Exactly what it sounds like. Poltergeists - corrupted spirits -  can possess people. What I actually do for a living is destroy poltergeists in a ritual commonly known as an exorcism. He didn’t look like one, but I still wanted to make sure. I’d have exorcized him for you if he was.” 

Lil hadn’t been expecting this as she froze a little on her stool realizing why the other was probably familiar to her. She also really didn’t know what to say for a moment, realizing that she probably shouldn’t be involved in this anymore. After all, her reputation had been in the gutter for this long, and working with someone who was famously a fraud wouldn’t exactly put her back into a good light with people. She was cashing in a lot of favors at the moment just to try to find her family after all, and she wasn’t particularly interested in jeopardizing that. 

Still as all the reason came to her on why she shouldn’t help the other and instead tell her to leave, Lil knew she wouldn’t do it. While she didn’t have any notion that she’d be any better then the people that had kicked her out, she at least wasn’t going to do the same to someone who needed help - and the other needed help. Specifically, she needed to know what she did and that the ghost was going to be stuck to her before she did something stupid to end up blacklisted like Lil was. 

 “Yeah that’s - you got really lucky then,” Lil said softly, considering her words carefully before she said them knowing that there were going to be a lot of questions. “I can’t tell exactly what you said, but it seems like you made a pact with the ghost outside. I’m pretty well read and I’m not exactly sure what she did here but - my best guess is she might have made her own ritual to do it. Essentially you made a contract with the ghost there - and he gave something up and now he’s bound to you. He won’t turn into a poltergeist which is good but -” Lil let her fill in the rest. It wasn’t uncommon for ghost to be bound to mediums, something she knew well enough as Blue was technically bound to her brother, but this was a stranger case.  “If you want more answers, I’ll have to get a scan or something of that page and try to translate it properly.” 

Lil paused for a moment, and realized that this was probably going to be more complicated than writing down the number to the ghostbusters. “I - so there is a group that you can go to learn, but I’m not sure how much they will like your show,” Lil tried to say amicably, “Not judging on my part just trying to let you know the dynamic. They can pair you up with someone who can help you with mediumship though if you follow their rules. You also probably shouldn’t mention that you’ve talked to me.” After a beat she continued, “They also won’t let you get rid of the guy out there, and to be honest if you want to be a practicing medium no one will. But - I can at least look into the ritual and see how strong the contract is, you might be able to get out of the pact if you really want or learn to communicate with him.” 

Looking at Winter she said softly, “Normally I would offer to exorcize him, but it wouldn’t be fair to either of you to do so. So the two things I can do is help you figure out what exactly you did in your ritual to understand it and teach you some things I know, or send you on to the ghostbusters. If you go onto the ghostbusters, it would be best not to associate with me though.” After all, Lilian Ballard was the Reaper, and probably on a wall of ‘do not associate’ with.

As expected, Lil’s reaction to her show wasn’t particularly a good one. It didn’t seem like it was wise to bring it up to any mediums with the she was talking about this so called group that could help Winter but it was out there and there was nothing she could do about it. They probably saw it as Winter mocking them but she liked to look at it as paying homage in a way even if she had no clue something like it had existed. Hell, she hadn’t even been sure that mediums were real until she was able to see the man currently locked out of this room.

All of the new information continued to bring questions to mind. So, ghosts could be malicious in nature, they didn’t need reasons for anything that they did, and there actually were exorcizing rituals that could be done that could get rid of them. This definitely was turning into a movie. There were still so many things Winter didn’t understand, so many questions that she wanted to ask but she really didn’t know where to start. She would be at this bakery for days if she asked them all right now. It was overwhelming to say the least. “Maybe, um…maybe we should take  this slower? This is a lot to process and I’m not sure everything can be explained today. I could write down more questions in a notebook and we can take them one at a time, if that would make things easier? And you’re willing, of course.”

She noticed that the other had gotten more uncomfortable after Winter had mentioned Spirit Speak but she hoped it wouldn’t deter her from wanting to help. She was talking about that group, saying something about sending Winter to them, but she shook her head each time Lil mentioned that. “I’d actually feel more comfortable if you taught me what I needed to know. I don’t know you but…you know everything now and they don’t. From what you’re telling me they wouldn’t like that I was doing the show and that’s something I’m not willing to give up so they probably wouldn’t want to help me anyway. Besides, I’ve never been great with rules. I get the feeling that’s why you think I shouldn’t mention you to them…because you’re the same, right?” 

What would happen to her great grandmother’s book if she went to these people anyway? The ritual was apparently an original one that the girl in front of her couldn’t quite understand yet. For all she knew, this group would try to take it away from her to be able to study it or something. “And I would like you to try and understand the ritual more if you don’t mind. But the book stays with me.” That was non-negotiable. Winter valued it more than most things in her life. 

At the fact that Winter wasn’t sure what was going on, Lil nodded and for the first time in a while smiled and laughed lightly, “Yeah, I am just throwing stuff at you. Sorry, I’ve grown up this way so I don’t know what you don’t know. I also haven't, you know, been asked so much.” It was true enough. She didn’t usually talk about mediumship in any sort of way that would make someone a mentee. Only the odd question here and there from someone who didn’t want to deal with ghosts. “Sure, I don’t mind answering things.” 

At Winter’s explanation, Lil wasn’t quite sure what the right thing would have been to do. She probably should insist the medium go through the Ghostbusters and get proper training, but at the end of the day Lil was a pragmatist. If Winter wouldn’t stop doing her show, then the Ghostbusters probably wouldn’t take her. Then she might be stubborn enough to continue to do rituals and not know what their effects were. So, while Lil might not be the best qualified - hell Jonas probably would be better although she didn’t want him to lose his license if she could help it- she was probably the only one in the area that would or could help. “Yeah, I got kicked out actually. What the hell, sure. I will say though, you’ll have to keep me on track cause I might think you know something you don’t. I’ve never mentored someone who’s starting out. You’ll have to tell me when you don’t understand, or I might not realize you don’t, you know?” 

That was true as well, Lil had helped other mediums at times, but normally they were trying to become exorcists - not starting out. At the request Lil nodded and said, “Sure I just need a picture of it. I would just suggest not doing any more rituals out of it until you know what they're doing. For most people they won’t work so you don’t have to keep it under lock and key like it's the necronomicon or something like that, but well if it’s a ritual it’s going to work if you do it. Does that make sense?”

Winter being mentored by someone who’d gotten kicked out of some secret organization for ghosts just felt right in her mind. It was exactly the type of thing that she gravitated towards on most days and she was thankful that Lil was willing to do this for her. And to be her first? That was special on it’s own. She could feel the unease of this whole situation starting to ebb away, her smile only growing as that feeling of discomfort became non-existent. Ghostbusters be damned, she had a Lil on her side now. 

“Trust me, I’ll have no issues in asking questions. You’re probably going to get sick of them actually, so fair warning. I’m a nuisance.” The fact that she was grinning at Lil as she said that should have been a clue to the other that Winter enjoyed being as such as well. By the time she met Lil again she’d have a whole notebook full of things she wanted to know and she was sure once the ritual was translated properly she’d be able to fill another. It occurred to her that Lil had no idea what she’d just gotten herself into. Oh well.

“I'll have copies to you as soon as possible. Or if you just want to take one on your phone I’m fine with that too.” She was eager, ready to know everything about this new part of herself and ready to learn more about why Lil was not connected to the ghostbusters anymore. She closed the book in her lap, leaning onto her arms as Winter draped them across the object, and spoke. 

“First question: How do you tell whether it’s a regular ghost or a poltergeist?”