#I guess that's how I'm tagging this haha
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My pal @kbthebearcat and I have been playing around with (and ultimately developed brainrot for) an Iron Giant AU featuring the kids from our ongoing RP, so I ended up sketching what Cricket might look like as a human since she'd essentially be filling the role of Hogarth. I also designed a couple extra outfits for fun, specifically based on my ideas for human Cricket's favorite outdoor interests and activities!
Cricket has something called acro-facial vitiligo, which is a pattern of vitiligo where skin cells on the face, hands, and feet lose pigment (as well as the knees, elbows, or armpits in certain cases). It's supposed to serve as a visual equivalent for the dark patches of fur found in her canon rat design. I always enjoy trying to preserve some aspects of the canon character when creating things like this ^^
#oc tag#Cricket#Unexpected Results RP#IG AU#I guess that's how I'm tagging this haha#human Cricket#kbthebearcat#it feels like it's been so long since I've drawn anything...ugh
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[Jash's Peculiar Excursion]
for the jojo x jash competition. Ok I literally have a blister on my thumb so I'm taking a break have a good one chat THE FUCKING DEADLINE IS SO FUCKING TIGHT FOR US IN THE STATES. CHRIST DUDE AAAAAAAAAexplodes
lineart only :)
#chonny jash#chonny jash fanart#...#jojo's bizarre adventure#??? i guess???????#augh this is kinda shit + looks bad on most platforms . djxnjfjfjg anyways#was a fun style study though!! the art style's always fascinated me tbh with how stylized it is#plus being both anime and taking inspiration from western influences as well#VERY FUNKY I LOVE. probably never going to watch the show thou#best of luck to anyone else who joined !!!!! i hope you win!!!! aaaa everyone's art is so prettyyjchcjndjnfjfjfjf /vvvpos#edit: SHIT I FORGOT#...kinito for scale#gahhhh#edit 2: i fucking. 150 jashbucks . in my paypal. what the fuck How the fuck mr jash. mr jash what the Fuck#what the Fuck#honestly i don't even care about the money i /hj . chonny jash liked my art and sent me a dm What the fuck#oh my god Oh my god#OH MY FUCKING GOD ?????#i'm so fucking honoured /gen‚ pos but also. also What the fuck#nibbs crashout of 2025 (i explode. IT'S HIM IT'S HIM?????????????? TERRIFYING WHATTTT)#i think he hates me or thinks i'm rude. haha anyways#<< written on feb 28th btw. hilariously enough#no one'll see the tags dwdw
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during the day it's almost like he's still here. he calls often and texts frequently, if parker misses him she knows she can just pick up her phone and he will be there.
but he won't be here.
eliot is here, and he tries to help parker fill the empty spaces, but he has his own spaces he fills and she doesn't want him to be hardison. she wants him to be eliot.
during the day they're with sophie and breanna and harry, and together they're a crew. not the crew, but they're close. when they're together, parker feels settled. she's not whole, but the emptiness is just a little less empty.
something is missing, but something else is found.
it's at night, when it's the hardest. when the bed is suddenly too big, when the table is suddenly too empty, when the house is suddenly too quiet.
eliot's arms come around parker then, a lock she doesn't break. he holds her and she feels his breath against her neck, listens to the quiet rumble of his voice as he talks. it fills the silence, but it can't replace what's gone.
nothing can.
she knows he'll come back. that one day the missing piece will slot back into place. until then she waits.
for him, she'll always wait.
#this has been in my drafts since july 2021 and i just read it and thought huh it's not that bad#so guess i'm posting it???#parker#eliot spencer#alec hardison#leverage ot3#leverage redemption#leverage#apparently i couldn't stop thinking about how eliot and parker had to adjust to haridson being gone#at least according to the original tag haha#alec x parker x eliot#ot3: we change together#totally forgot the tag i used for them haha
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When i said get better by alt-j was for Corvo and Jess I wasn’t joking
A bittersweet little story about how the future empress of the isles met her loyal bodyguard (and immediately had a crush)
#dishonored#corvo attano#jessamine kaldwin#art tag#it was 31 hours in Procreate alone#and it took me about a week? to finish it#damn I’m kinda slow haha#nothing like a tragic love story am I right#i can't see mistakes rn but I'm 100% sure i will in a couple of days#i don't like how it came out but that's okay i guess. I'll get better
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SOOOO i wrote a chrissell fanfic!!
it is... a very self-indulgent little one shot and my first attempt on a fic ever.... :>
they kiss kiss 👨❤️💋👨
#end roll#chris (end roll)#russell seager#chrissell#fanfic#kurirase#non-art tag#technically my art still but just not... visual art i guess#i'll figure out if i wanna tag that too later#i'm so sad btw bc i could not for the love of myself figure out how to get the text on top of the embed here :(#if i ever figure that out i'll probably edit that change in#ANYWAY!!! I HOPE U ENJOY TO ANYONE WHO READS#i sure did <333#i'm too dead to ramble in the tags more rn ehehee#i've barely written anything all year bc of getting into end roll HAHA so it's great knowing that i'm still able to#and even then it was all just very wordy oc interactions before
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Oh look! It's another redesign!
Here, have this little illustration based on my Ladybug/Chat Noir re-designs, that I've been slaving away at for the past month (we're just gonna ignore the fact that I started plotting out the costumes and sketched the pose a year ago lol). I know, I know. A redesign? Very original. But hey I haven't done it yet, so that makes it different ok😝!
(Gosh, I usually don't post sketches, I feel like this is exposing all my drawing weaknesses lol)
These are some of the first doodles I did. For Marinette I basically looked at some traditional Qui Pao and Hanfu dresses for inspiration and mixed and matched details I liked. I also gave her these little skirt flaps (?? whatever you want to call it) to symbolise the ladybug wings and kept the spots concentrated there. All in all I actually immediately knew what I wanted to do with her costume and pretty much just kept to my first draft, but what really gave me trouble was the hair somehow. I really wanted to incorporate actual antennae (I just think it's cute🤧!!!!) but it got too crowded up there so I had to let them go eventually🥺. In the end I settled for her twin tails pulled up instead of down. To make it look more distinct from her civilian form the idea was also that her hair colour changes to black after the transformation.
Chat Noir on the other hand was so difficult😭😭😭. I honestly like the original design soo much it was hard to think about alternatives. I wanted something that matched better with my new Ladybug, but I don't think I succeeded much. Also I hyperfocused on giving him this little scarf/oversized collar thing in my first doodles because I thought it looked cool and ended up scrapping it because the little bell is just too iconic not to keep lol. As you can tell from the final illustration there is actually not all that much that made it into the final version, except for the sheer sleeves, the shoes, the claw marks and some neon green details. I also ended up giving both of them some gold accents to make them match a bit more. As with Marinette, the idea is that Adrien's hair changes colour a bit after transforming too. So I envision Adrien having more of the smooth platinum blond in his civillian form and a more brown-ish dirty blond as Chat Noir, to go for the whole stray cat look lol.
I might come back to this one day, to re-do their civilian forms too or make these costumes more practical rather than just focusing on aesthetics (But hey if the show does this than I am allowed too😂!)
#shioris_art#miraculous#miraculous ladybug#ml#mlb#miraculous adventures of ladybug and chat noir#miraculous redesign#ladybug redesign#chat noir redesign#digital art#artists on tumblr#fanart#ml fanart#mlb fanart#ladynoir#shh please don't ask me what marinette's costume looks like from the back I haven't thought that far ok xD!#and on other news guess who finally caught up to season 5? and#WTF WAS THAT ENDING????????????????#RFYVYDVNMKGDYCIFTDHGFYFJHKFUF#like astronomical cringe at certain moments aside I thought season 5 had a pretty good start but then they hit you with those last episodes#and I just????!!!#i don't know why I keep expecting anything from this show when it just keeps spitting in my face??#my rage is immeasurable#damn it I hate how much this damn show has me in an emotional choke hold#I feel like a victim of stockholm syndrome lmao#if anyone is actually reading this far ahead in the tags sorry for the unrelated salt lol but I'm so mad haha
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"They wail in the night. Drifting in shadow. The Phantoms of the Machine. The ghosts."
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We are at the very end of spooky season.
I finished this one a while ago. I was wanting to post this at the same time as the other last 3 TID prompts that I was wanting to do*. I had another idea for this prompt, but I think that would be good for another separate drawing. Plus, I've been wanting to draw Slicer for a while now. Kinda proud of this one. One of those drawings that I look at and think "wait, I think I cooked here". I had to swap my mouse for a different one, so drawing this (specifically sketching this) was really something. But I'm getting used to it I think.
I had to improvise in the background. Lots of negative space that I had to learn how to fill. Not half-bad.
The next time I draw Slicer it probably won't be with this level of detail. At least in this specific case, it made me discover one or two small details in her design that I hadn't noticed before. It's cool.
Since it's already Halloween, I thought it would be appropriate to finally post this now. (I thought about posting this tomorrow, but not only do I think it's better to post this today, but I'll probably be too busy thinking about Bendy's new announcement tomorrow, whatever that may be)
But yeah. Happy Halloween folks!
*Yes, I'm still doing those prompts. They are being done! I'm just kinda busy. I think I will post them during November. I know that TID is over and I don't need to do them. But I'm stubborn and want to do it anyway lol.
Unfiltered version below:
#bendy and the ink machine#batim#bendy and the dark revival#batdr#the butcher gang#batdr carley#batdr slicer#crookedsmileart#eye contact#the ink demonth#Almost no one posts in this tag now and here I go to post in it#It is how it is i guess#I'm cooking with some drawings this year tbh#I'm surprised with myself haha
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I'm calling this "tumblr rambles because my friends (who don't use tumblr and follow my bsky) still don't know I'm attempting to rig a wholeass vtuber model for my streams and think I'm just gonna make a 2 frame png" lol
but I redrew the face and adjusted some things on her and man I'm way more happy with her and actually feel motivated to finish the art again!! she's just been sitting there in procreate cuz I felt like I hit a roadblock (and after taking a break the model started to look off LOL) BUT WE'RE BACK!!
most of my stream stuff is done (and I showed them instead of saving it for the streams lol I got impatient with myself :'D) and this model has been the main thing keeping me busy now BUT IM SO CLOSE GOSH DANGIT!! I WILL GO LIVE THIS CALENDAR YEAR
#tea rambles#<- I'm also realising how similar my tag is to my fellow tea moots one lol#it's good to be working on this again :')#idk why but finishing touches are always so tough for me to conquer#I guess because there's not really any exciting new stuff coming from it anymore it's just polishing haha#which is interesting because with illustrations I LOOOVEEE the finishing details#also ABSOLUTELY this is not throwing shade to 2 frame pngs I should clarify skdj#pngtubers are the heckin coolest I EVEN HAVE A 2 FRAME PNG LOL she's so silly#she's mostly for emergencies when my computer wants death and to fling over to ppl if they wanna collab
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" just...come here. just sit here with me" (...that one scene from princess momonoke, click for better resolution)
#tw death mentioned for the tag rambles!! (sorry)#meme redraw gone wrong (high effort). don't ask me how i did this- i don't know either. consider this perhaps an AU of the pyre scene?#or more accurately just my internal wonderings visualised. sometimes the vibes from the implications don't pan out the same way#i also lost the original sketch somewhere in my papers. alas. i vaguely recall thinking this would be haha funny and then somewhere down#the line it turned to angst. other quotes that inspired this from the show were 'ily. i'm sorry' and 'i will always be so proud of you'.#smth smth they met on the roof!! vincent stops quincy from jumping off and then. vincent tries to die + eventually quincy kills him on the#very same roof. anyway the quincent death scene was spinning around for a bit in my head and out of the miscellaneous sketches this won out#wanted to play w the strong blue lighting + bg + silhouette things that you get w stage lighting // replaced the knife w vincent's scalpel#quincy is kneeling bc poses + idk why it's fun staging for him ;-; // also the proximity + intimacy.. // the pyre is also in the bg#but it's silhouetted behind quincy. i think the last quincy post made me associate symbolism (help??) bc as i was painting i was thinking o#angel wings ksdjfh // not to mention the halos. halos are always fun to paint.. shiny stuff...#and from the last vincent art. i guess the star and eye imagery carried over. hm. tried to get the quincy halo to match so its like a#rounder less spiky star? which hehe aligns w the sun vibes (that i??can't explain??) but more importantly here i was thinking about#binary stars for the glowy parts. two in orbit in pull to one another.. tension.. ue. also the glow for vincent goes to stabby eye so like#behind the face shown to viewer. meanwhile for quincy it goes in front of the face#and of course u have the downward linking implied line from quincy's tears +scalpel + glowy eye.#this is supposed to be rotatable.. in landscape form u can have either quincy or vincent upright (pov) + it should work both ways#//bonus stuff is vincent holding the skask w bloody hands + shadow looks like blood spatters. like it would if quincy did the stabby.#hhhh this is the most. confused i have been making a piece lately.. just toss in a lot of fun visual stuff and mix..#if the rambling analysis here seems pointless and confused i think that's why. this is why u should plan out your essays o.O..#oh. stuff i just remembered: the whole impetus for vincent planning his own death was so quincy would be happy / it's already#mentioned before quincy kills vincent that he's severely injured- vincent says it's fine- ig u could intepret it as a finishing blow?#hastened over the phaethon announcement- when they make the second announcement quincy looks up smiling until the admin gives it to#beatrix-he didn't know.. // <- so for this it's possible to infer that vincent wasn't very attached to living anymore.. hence why they look#more accepting above. while quincy is looking very angsty and conflicted. yeah.. // tldr! don't look into it too deeply it's a meme redraw#adamandi#quincy cynthius martin#vincent aurelius lin#tw knife
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the way i know it's taking everything in him not to say some ridiculous comment to the press rn 😭
#like this man cannot talk to the press right now#he knows he'd say something crazy :')#the strength lmao#listen...i made a whole rant in some tags about this yesterday#but tldr: i did NOT expect his camp to be making a fuss like this so soon?#we know he was willing to wait until jj got done#i just assumed that would extend to next year#since the cap will go up and i'm sure average WR APY will go up#but it's looking more and more like he wants the new contract now??#which i'm all for!#and the bengals should be too! but uh we aren't GREAT at making the most efficient business moves#fascinating to see how this is gonna go#i'm sure he won't hold out the whole camp#1. he wants to be out there and he wants to work (and he wants to beat the chiefs week 2 probably more than he wants any money in the world#2. he's got 2 more years on the his current deal#so holding out won't really accomplish much#and i do just want to emphasize i'm sure a deal WILL get done#i just assumed the timeframe was next year?#and probably it still is?#but i guess ja'marr/his agent are just seeing if they can make one last big push to get it done this year?#(aka getting kelsey and schefter etc to bang the drum for him in the media)#(because HE certainly can't do it without saying something insane)#haha look how i said tldr earlier#i obviously didn't mean it i never mean it#y'all know i can't shut up to save my life about this man#ja'marr chase
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I'm just figuring out how important music is in my life! This is coming from a long while trying to cut down on my music use, mostly because I was listening to it so much that it felt more like I couldn't do anything without popping in some earbuds, and partially because of other personal reasons. Some of my routines changed, forcing me to not listen to music while doing certain things, and it ended up becoming that besides working on homework or drawing, I didn't listen to music at all. But I've given myself a break today since I have nothing to do and since, for reasons, I'm feeling just a lil crappy today—and boy, I'm starting to realize again just why I love music!!
I love the diverse music taste I've developed over the years! My family is not only big about music but big about listening to it loud, so the majority of my music taste for most of my life has just been Christian hiphop (Lecrae, KB, Andy Mineo, Trip Lee, and ironically Tonex, whose album where he was struggling hard with his gayness has been my favorite concert movie since I was 5) and gospel music (Kirk Franklin, Tye Tribbett, etc.). And music was one of the few connections between me and my race (I grew up feeling pretty estranged from my blackness as a kid, but the popular songs they played at the YMCA in the 2010s were some of the few things I could use to feel more connected) and between me and my classmates/friends at the Y (I still have fond memories of playing FNAF songs in mat forts and reciting lyrics at pool parties). But I got tired of knowing I could never bond with anyone besides family friends music taste-wise when I was in high school, and so I started listening to secular music on my own time. And that's how I first found Ghost and Pals, a vocaloid artist and one of the first secular music folks I listened to as a kid (can you smell the religious trauma yet? Lol), and that's how I bonded with one of my best friends in early college (ironically, also my first time being publically queer). Now I listen to Kpop, anime songs, songs from warriors MAPs, songs from musicals (Hamilton and In the Heights <3), latin songs, metal songs, and even some secular songs young me would've been too scared to listen to.
And music has always been one of my biggest sources of stimming! I can't dance to save my life, but music will sure get me to flick my fingers and hit my fist against my shoulder furiously. Music was one of the first clues that I like stimming with vibration too (since I love laying against the car door and turning up the music loud enough to feel the world shake around me). And music was one of the first things that made me look into ADHD or autism (specifically, listening to Ghost and Pals songs for a month straight and getting my friend at early college [who also has ADHD] to start looking at me funny when I was discovered doing chores and listening to one of three songs for the fifth time). Music is so cool it'll get me to wax poetically. It was one of the things that kept me together during my roughest times and soothed me during my best. I listen to it while I write, while I cry, while I hang out with my friends and family and while I chill by myself. It's how I relax after a long day, and it's how I feel safe. I feel kinda emotional finally having music hit that spot in me without feeling like I need it to do stuff.
#songs listened to while writing this post:#Tell Your Girlfriend by Lay Bankz#Get Up (Live) by Tye Tribbett#the Oshi no Ko OP song for season 1 (by Yoasobi) - which I ironically found before getting into Oshi no Ko#Waterfalls Coming Out Your Mouth by Glass Animals#Como Fue by 116#Creator (a Minecraft song I picked up from my college friend J)#The Ultimate Soldier (Evangelion)#Reckless Battery Burns by Ghost and Pals#Uncanny x Deathbody remix by Ghost and Pals#Watch Me Work (Trolls 3)#Mount Rageous (Trolls 3)#Better Place (Trolls 3)#Hayloft 2 by Mother Mother#Hayloft 2 Smashup by Mother Mother#Don't You Worry About a Thing (the Sing movie)#Mama by My Chemical Romance (found through a warriors MAP [yes the one you're thinking of])#Gossip by Måneskin#Looking at my playlists getting more and more secular songs feels like healing#but I also love that I can still listen to gospel hiphop or gospel music without feeling ashamed or (completely) embarrassed#(except for Bizzle but that was always more of my dad's music taste anyway)#also yes I have tinnitus how could you guess? Haha but for real it feels like an okay sacrifice to me (more like a battle wound for loving#music so much - but everyone else please use ear protection if you can! Tinnitus doesn't bother me too much but it could you!)#fenn rambles#gonna use this tag for my favorite rants and rambles that I'm most proud of hehe#(also this is an excuse to not leave some non-alterhuman-themed or non-neopronouns-themed stuff untagged >:3)#music#(also I went to a KB concert recently and it was HYPE)#(and I went to Winter Jam in Mobile and it was legitimately one of the best concert experiences in my life - Lecrae >>>>#love his new album hehehe)
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hello! i've been a follower for a little while because of how beautifully you render gonta. i just wanted to thank you for the different ways you portray him- both the beautiful and the messy -and how it's helped me a lot with my emotional state. i don't know if this makes sense, but your art gives off such a sense of calm strength perfect for gonta and i just wanted to say thanks for all the good gonta contents. take care
Thank you so much, for seeing my stuff in such positive way, and also for sharing your thoughts with me - it really cheered me up. I had no clue my art can have such vibe and effect on someone… O<-< You take care, too!
#; - ;#turbo-tsun reply#calm strength huh...#sometimes I thought how my art feels to others#I always try my best with technical stuff and conveying emotion and motion and such but as for the impression it gives off#well I don't think it's something that I could ever guess or see kinda like I cannot see myself from outside at all times#'calm strength' isn't something i'd ever consider given my own rather nervous character haha...#though Gonta really does bring me peace of mind so maybe THAT'S what showing through#I'm really really glad it could've helped you in turn#and now you helped me cheer up too really it was great timing#I actually felt rather bad in past few days but your kind words really brightened my day#the circle of kindness XD#why am I writing in tags adsgjhhdas#I dunno it kind of feels more comfortable and less 'stage frighty'? I still work on being able to talk freely#either way thank you so much again!
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Wasnt anything specific i wanted to know.
I just wanted to know which amazing person has been blessing us with this amazing art.
My favorite color is black and somehow my entire closet is all colorful too.
well rest assured the Amazing Person Blessing The People is mr snapperoni 😌 i dont have any accolades beyond that LMAO but yes it is me delivering my specific brand of cherik works....
#snap chats#i mean i guess my old friend the other day did say how i was 'still the best person she knows that draws bara' sajvALVKJAVJ#so i guess there's that... identifying trait of me.. i blame jojo..#so funny on the colorful closet tho lmao.. i keep telling myself i need more colors... more colors that ARENT red ☝️#oh i guess that's another thing to know about me red's a lucky color for me#my sister Accidentally keeps gifting me red things ad my sister's Pretty Cool so .. lucky color...#like she went to italy after graduating and got me one of them lil pepper/horn necklaces that i always got on#and she also got me a lil bat ring with a red gem on it for my birthday that I Also Refuse To Take Off vJAELKJA#red's just a pretty color too.... all colors are pretty what am i on... but i do have a special thing for red its like third favorite#purple and green... love them colors.... like ok piccolo 😩 purple/red/green so all the villain/evil colors.. ggs...#im rambling now tho that's another thing to know about me I Talk Too Much HAHA#Another another thing to know about me im very hungry. i just got done going on a walk wtih my dog and i heated up some pasta#but the bowl's too hot so i'm waiting for it too cool but i know im gonna forget it for like an hour and then be mad when its cold#happens with my tea all the time.. i also drink tea a lot i have multiple pots a day maybe like three#mostly because i always forget i make a pot and then its cold and ill be like 'ok well i wanted hot tea'#so ill finish that pot but incidentally the cycle repeats cause I Always Forget... like i just made tea too... watch me forget it..#anyway hope that supplies more Get To Know Me Info !!!!!!! im always talkin bout some nonsense in my tags so...
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I'm gonna be honest, if I was any GokuLuck member I'd probably be Shion (Kenta and Ryoga are a close 2nd).
#i was originally planning to post this when i changed my theme as a “haha i'm a slut” type of thing#but based on how far i've gone since then in a little over a week i don't think it matters anymore#i've also just had thoughts over the past day so it only felt right to post this now#paradox live#paralive#gokuluck#kaida shion#shion kaida#shitpost#kia's posts#kia's shitposts#personal#(i guess?)#march 2025#i was wanting to stop tagging a bunch of my fandom stuff as 'personal' but here we are
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eyyyy look who tried to do some modding in veilguard :D
I love that Rook gets to wear this coat with the feathers but I hated the leather high-collared studded whatever-the-hell shirt thing that was going on underneath. so I tried to swap it with the "civilian" version but keep the feathers :D
the coat and pants clip like hell on my shortass elf, but still! (actually I checked and it clips on the civilians who wear it too... so that's not a me problem lmao)
anyway to elaborate: initially I tried to edit the textures to get rid of the weird shirt thing BUT the chevron stitched pieces are part of the model (BOOOOO) so despite changing their color/texture I couldn't get rid of them entirely. then I saw that swapping armor/character parts was a thing? …that I don't really understand, honestly, but there's a tutorial and I can follow steps. anyway, some civilians in Treviso wear the same coat with this low-cut shirt underneath except no feathers, and I wanted that BUT WITH THE FEATHERS. so. I did it! YAY GO ME!!! not super thrilled with the pants but I like the civilians' boots better too.
here was my initial check to see what it did to npcs that share the outfit:
and checking the color-changed version next to a civilian npc
coat and feather colors achieved! now to do the shirt and pants.
to elaborate more: so in the Rook and Ivenci versions, there are three meshes (? correct term idk?) that combine to make the whole ensemble: feathers, coat, and undershirt-belt-arms-pants-boots. can't just make the undershirt invisible bc there's no torso under there lol and it would also get rid of the arms and legs. in the civilian outfit there are two meshes: coat-and-belt and undershirt-torso-arms-pants-boots.
but like. they're basically the same? so I thought I should just be able to leave the feathers in place and replace the coat and undershirt! which worked! (after uhhhhhh several fails. yes I can follow a tutorial; that doesn't mean I can follow it on the first try because using the frosty editor feels approximately like me walking blindfolded through a convenience store knocking things off shelves. or something. idk what the hell I'm doing lol)
I hate wearing the same outfit as Ivenci tho. seriously considering putting Ivenci in something else and giving the random civilian npcs Ivenci's fit lmao. or just dress the civilians in some other civilian outfit? I wonder if I can do that...
#elle plays da#i don't think this is spoilers? and i suspect anyone who follows me has already finished so#not putting it in the main tag#veilguard modding#inexpertly?#sorry to more experienced modders i don't mean to intrude on the tag haha#if i get it to a point where i'm Satisfied i *might* get the courage to put it on nexus#i mean i really wish we could just dye stuff like in inquisition BUT NO#...#it took me a stupid long time to realize probably why i liked this coat so much#and how once i got it and i was like “hmmm i feel like this would be better in green. i wish this were green”#i mean green is one of my favorite colors but. that is. not why i thought that#took me at least a day to figure it out lmao#(...it reminds me of anders' coat ok. shhhhh shut up)#this is basically me ruthlessly beating digital things into submission to distract myself from The Horrors#if i can get the computer to do what i want (despite it being ~*Illegal*~) that means i have... Succeeded. at. something? at least#sure brain. i guess that's true
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me ignoring all the ocd symptoms in the hopes it'll go away
#yeah the rabies confession was mine and yeah I do see literally everyone telling me to look into ocd#well jokes on you guys I HAVE and I have been in denial for years :))#okay but actually it's my fear that since I'm definitely never gonna be able to get a diagnosis I don't wanna think about it too much-#because if I think about it too much and even consider the possibility that I Might have ocd-#and it turns out I DON'T actually have it-#then I am a liar and a fraud and a horrible person for even thinking about it! :) and then I feel like garbage#which hey guys guess what!!!!! that's another FREAKING SYMPTOM APPARENTLY!!!!!!!!!#looks at a post. oh haha that's so relatable :)) checks the tags ah right another post about ocd how lovely. hundreds of times.#but uh yeah I could probably make a list of all the symptoms but I'm not gonna#because of the fear :thumbsup:
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