#I fr almost fell asleep
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aitsuheart · 9 months ago
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I never played the mobile games but I watched the cutscenes
I think a lot of people do that
but I remember watching them for all those hours straight no break
at one point I was getting tired from reading and staring at my screen for so long that I almost fell asleep
but I had to skip it back 10-30 minutes because of this
I'm glad that one group who is dubbing it though it makes it easier to watch
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lale-txt · 1 month ago
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my tattoo artist is back from her hiatus which means i can finally get my hands tattooed :3c
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cas---2y5 · 3 months ago
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happy weekend y’all I look like an impressionist painting of bruises all over and have not a single thought in my head
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rxttingawayy · 1 year ago
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now ik why ive been so clingy this past week god damn 😭
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kokoch4n3l · 4 months ago
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The absolute pain of being called “kiddo” by your cousin’s huge tattooed friends :(
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fatestitcherr · 5 months ago
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could not relate (i am unfortunately an england fan)
cricket is so much fun when you don't have to worry about losing
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palajae · 8 months ago
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my name. | nishimura riki
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PAIRING ▸ nishimura riki! x reader
GENRE ▸ detective! au, fantasy! au, high school! au, s2ls, romance, fluff, angst, humor, SLOW BURN
WC ▸ 15.6k
SUMMARY ▸ you supposedly get transported to a different world, where you encounter niki. apparently, you already existed here. note: past tense. so now you’re stuck in an alternate universe and technically, you’re supposed to be dead. 
AKA after facing the truth, you come to the realization that someone was definitely trying to kill you.
AN/NOTES ▸ mentions of death!!!, a murder mystery/whodunit, profanity, mentions of suicide, depictions of murder, a few curse words, violence, blood, dead bodies, some gorey stuff, kissing, nothing too harsh, excuse any typos/misspellings...
wow... i can't believe it but it is finally out... it's been a long time coming lol. with losing several family members and hospital visits over the past year, i wasn't sure if this was ever going to get released. thank you all for your endless (fr) patience and support. happy reading ❤️
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a faceless figure stretches out a hand towards you.
you squint but for some reason, you still can’t make them out. the longer you stare, the more you realize it was a person—a blurry vision of a faceless boy. considering the matching uniform to yours, he must’ve gone to your school …was he your classmate? 
you frown. you’ve never seen anyone like him in class before. you stretch out your arm, fingertips barely grazing his- 
the sound of the school bell ringing causes your eyelids to fly open.  you groan, yawning and getting up from your seat by the window by default. 
it wasn’t a nice nap—just one that left you feeling groggy, unsettled, and strangely incomplete. 
you pack up your stuff quietly and leave the classroom alone, not bothering to look for your friends. as you walk down the stairs, you hear your classmates chattering about the weather.you glance outside. 
it was a dreary, unwelcoming kind of rain—part of the reason why you fell asleep earlier in class—and you suddenly feel the urge to get home. as soon as possible. 
you weren’t sure why, but it wasn’t just raining. it started to pour, especially hard, on this spring day. you want to think that was what made your mood all miserable and forlorn. 
not to forget the fact that you didn’t have an umbrella, leaving you no other choice but to throw your hood on and tighten the strings of your hoodie over your school uniform. not exactly the most stylish look, yet it was comfortable enough for you. 
you couldn’t put a finger on the emotion, but you felt out of place, like for some weird reason… you didn’t belong here. like you belonged out of this circle, away from this life and world. 
that feeling always came up when it started to rain, and you always tried your best to suppress it. but it was particularly strong today. 
you shrugged it off though. those “phases” weren’t uncommon, right? 
though you made it halfway out the school grounds by yourself, hyein and hanni catch up to you as you walk. you give them a half-hearted smile, “hey.”
it doesn’t take much for them to notice your off behavior. hyein eyes you. 
“you okay, y/n?” 
you debate internally, reminding yourself that they’re your friends. you can trust them, rely on them. you’re allowed to do that. even more so, aren’t you supposed to do that? 
but the words that come out of your mouth suggest otherwise. you shrug, “it’s nothing. it’s just been a weird day, you know?”
they share a glance before turning back to you, sympathetic smiles on their faces. hanni pats you on the shoulder, “yeah, we get it. you should get some rest at home, y/n. we’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
“be careful on the way back! the rain doesn’t look like it’s stopping soon.” she calls out before they continue, leaving you behind—still as soaked as ever. 
you wave before sighing, gripping the straps of your backpack tighter and making your way towards the train station. the sound of the rain almost makes you fall into a daze as you go about your way. all your school stuff and clothes were definitely getting soaked, which probably meant an oncoming cold, but you could’ve cared less. 
the only thing that mattered was going home and sleeping off this weird feeling, so it could become tomorrow and you didn’t have to be in this situation anymore. 
the train station is strangely busy, you figure the downpour was making everyone go home sooner. you bypass several people, almost getting your soaked and stained shoes stepped on several times. all while muttering quiet “excuse me’s” to practically everyone and anyone who cared to listen. 
after what seemed like ages, you manage to make it to your train.  although, the large crowd surrounding the entrance effectively prevents you from getting anywhere. 
you mutter a curse, trying to navigate through the waves of people. you just barely get on before the doors begin closing. letting out a huff in relief, you lean back against the door and slowing yourself a moment to close your eyes in peace. all the seats were obviously taken at that point, so you had no choice but to stand. that’s fine—you end up drifting off anyway. 
you don’t know how long it’s been since you fell asleep. or why you feel even more exhausted when you wake up. but the robotic voice announcing your arrival makes your eyes automatically flutter open. you feel your body getting pushed and shoved around as everyone tries to get out all at once. 
so you grit your teeth and tug down your hood further until you can finally get out. you don’t pay much attention to your surroundings, too focused on not getting knocked to the ground. when you finally stumble out of the crowd onto the station platform, you try to collect yourself while shaking your head. then you frown, 
wait a second-
something solid knocks into you from the side, a rough oof! escaping out of their--mouth?
you’re knocked onto the ground, bottom first. pain shoots into your palms that tried (and failed) to catch your fall—and obviously, your butt as well. 
you groan, eyes flashing in annoyance at your unknown assailant. looking up, you stop at the sight of the… boy in front of you. 
you really have no idea why, but a question immediately pops into your head—
have you met before?
you don’t voice it, but it lingers in the back of your mind. the boy—as far as you can tell, he looks around your age— simply stares at you. he’s in a strikingly similar uniform. 
a flicker of recognition passes in his eyes before you watch his expression grow flabbergasted. he continues to stare at you for a solid minute, while you only stare back in confusion, still on the floor.
“it’s rude to stare, you know.” you finally state with a furrowed brow as you quickly gathering your bearings. 
his only response is a blink.  
it's like the two of you are frozen in time, everyone else getting drowned out in the moment. 
you frown, narrowing your eyes at him. “hello? did you hear me?” you repeat yourself and this time he snaps out of it. 
“y-you’re not supposed to be here.” he gets out shakily, looking around while his hand runs through his dark locks in distress. you cross your arms, “what do you mean? this is my stop…” 
you falter when you remember what you saw earlier. when you got off the train, you took a quick glance at the signs and posts. yeah, this definitely wasn’t your stop. 
that wouldn’t have been a huge issue- if it wasn’t for the fact that you never missed your station, no matter the circumstances.  
“no!” he exclaims and you flinch at the outburst. the boy glances at you again, and this time you involuntarily shiver at the unreadable look in his eyes. 
“you’re…. you’re supposed to be dead.”
your mouth drops open. 
“what a great first thing to say to someone you just bowled over. not even a sorry..” you mutter off, suddenly finding the strength to get up and wipe your hands. 
the boy takes a step back away from you. curiously, you take one forward, towards him. he gestures a hand at you almost aggressively. 
“you’re dead. you died. i swear-“
you hold out your hands in half desperation and half exasperation, “i dunno if this is some dumb prank or something i missed, but i hate to break it to you. i’m not dead. i’m literally right here in front of you. i think i would know if i died or not. i’m-” 
again, that feeling of being out of place washes over you. this time it steals your breath away. 
the strange boy shakes his head. “there’s no way. i know exactly who you look like.”
his next words make your blood run cold. 
“you’re exactly like y/n y/l/n—who died a week ago.” he looks you up and down again, hands curling into fists. 
“who are you? and why do you look just-?”
“because that’s who i am? my name is y/n! now, if you would excuse me.”  
you hold up a hand, you didn’t have the time or patience to deal with weirdos on the street. it did struck a little odd that he knew your name, but then again he must’ve gone to your school and heard of you somewhere. the only thing that unsettled you was his reaction. 
it just seemed too real, like he couldn’t have been that good at acting. 
he grabs your arm to prevent you from leaving. all he does is shake his head again like he’s just trying to reassure himself. you’re about to protest, so utterly confused at what’s happening-how you missed your stop and why this strange boy is saying that you’re dead. none of it makes sense. 
his face looks pale and grim, and you’re sure yours look exactly the same. “you can’t be y/n. and yet, here you are right in front of me.” 
“i will scream like a little girl for help if you don’t let me go at this-“
“p-please. this isn’t a joke. you can’t be here. we need to get out of here—where everyone can’t see you.” 
before you can even splutter a response, he drags you off. 
you can call me niki, his words echo in your head. 
his name rolls off your tongue unfamiliarly. in his states of panic—to which niki kept slapping himself and you kept denying that you were a hallucination—
you ended up introducing yourselves and deciding to find a better place to discuss. more like, niki decided. you soon began to regret that decision. 
all you wanted to do was go home, but this persistent kid you’ve never seen before wouldn’t let you or your conscience go. maybe it was the weird feeling from earlier, but you have the urge to at least hear him out. but when you walked out of that train station behind him, everything was wrong. 
you don’t know how to describe it. it was right but… at the same time, it wasn’t. 
to begin with, you ended up at the wrong station but it led you to the right street to get home. the streets name were the same, but the stores weren’t. 
and the bus stop—the bus driver that had worked there for fifteen years, the one you had greeted for fifteen years, suddenly became an entirely different person. he never missed a day, no matter what occasion it was. 
things weren’t right and you had no idea what was going on. 
following niki, you get lost in your thoughts. you shake your head, clapping a hand over your forehead. maybe… you’re just in a weird dream. a really realistic one, because none of this made sense. it wasn’t raining anymore either, which would’ve been fine, excluding for one tiny detail: the streets were completely dry. judging by the strength of the rain earlier, it really shouldn’t—no, it couldn’t have dried up that fast. 
It wasn’t physically possible. 
you could easily navigate your way around this area because you lived here all your life. and yet, it felt like you didn’t live here. not when this random stranger (only on a first name basis) keeps insisting that you died. 
niki—or whoever—leads you to a very familiar library, the same one where you spent hours studying for your finals. you head in, feeling a bit better hearing the familiar entrance chime. you walk ahead of him to take your spot by the back corner. the fact that this place was essentially the same gave you some comfort.
niki seems surprised, but he doesn’t say anything, only taking the seat across from you. 
“okay.” you start, glancing at the boy with wary eyes. 
“if whatever bs you’re spewing is true, explain.”
he raises his eyebrows. 
“me? explain?” 
you nod and he scoffs, “i think you’re the one who should be explaining. after all, you’re the one that’s supposed to be dead-“
“i’m not dead.” you grit out, rolling your eyes. 
“okay, okay,” he raises his hands in surrender, “but you still need to talk.”
you sigh, rubbing your temples. 
“what do you want me to say? that i got soaked, took the train home, overslept, and then missed my stop? then, i bumped into a weird boy-”
he shoots you an offended look, which you ignore. 
“-who keeps telling me that i died. oh, and the more and more i stay here with you, the more wrong everything gets?” you barely get the last word out before niki leans in, eyes focused intently on you. 
the closer he gets, you more you begin to malfunction. you unconsciously hold your breath, alarm and confusion evident in your eyes. his hand reaches out, slowly, to your head. your body freezes.
his fingers catch a drop of water at the tip of your hair. “sorry. that was bothering me.” 
you exhale, glaring at him. “are you serious?”
“yeah. are you?” 
“no,” you deadpan, “i’m a ghost and i’m haunting you. of course i’m being serious!” 
he gives you an unconvinced look and you roll your eyes, “i’m y/n y/l/n. we live an hour away from the capital. my house is two blocks away in the neighborhood with the broken fountain, and right now we’re at the library that doesn’t open on thursdays.  
you harshly tug off your suddenly dry hoodie, displaying your school uniform. 
“and by the looks of it, we go to the same school.”
his eyes widen as he leans in closer to study your uniform. you shrug away, caught off guard. then you frown, “but i’ve never seen you before at school. how do i know that you’re not some imposter?  that you somehow stole a uniform to get something from me?”
he rolls his eyes while you gaze at him suspiciously.
“obviously not, because that’s dumb.” 
you scoff. 
“i live here. why would i go through all the trouble to steal a uniform to get something from you? besides, what would i need from some-“ 
he glances at you and you tense,  
“-kid like you? you’re the one who came out of the train looking so suspicious, it’s like you appeared out of nowhere,” he counters. 
you place your palms flat on the table, “okay, it’s obvious we aren’t getting anywhere. we both don’t have answers and we’re not even close to one. all i know is that i’m alive,” you shoot him another look, “and that i somehow ended up here. now, can i go?”
there’s a brief pause before niki speaks up, slowly. “i already told you, you can’t be seen. come with me. and keep the hood on.” 
you roll your eyes. who was he to boss you around? 
he grumbles something along the lines of- “don’t want to be seen walking around with a dead person.” 
the only reason you listened was partly due to fear that you would lose your way in this familiar, yet unfamiliar place.   except, you know exactly where he’s taking you. because it’s the same neighborhood you live in. 
“wait,” you call out, “this is where i live.” you point to your house, and niki grimaces. 
“i know. there were police here for days.” 
you stop, unsure of what to say or do. police? at your house? when? 
you stare at your supposed house, suddenly dark and empty. what in the world happened? 
“come on,” niki calls out and you move to catch up. you’re starting to think niki may be telling the truth. 
soon enough, you make it to an unfamiliar house about a street down from yours. as niki unlocks the door, you take the opportunity to study him, trying to recall if you’ve ever seen him before. but when he turns to you, you clear your throat and look away. 
“this is my house,” he tilts his head while opening the door. 
you like the fact that it’s messy. it felt much more homey because of that. it was also a lot bigger than yours, filled with fancy and intricate things. to which you assume this niki guy has more money than he has yet to admit. he tells you to wait in the living room, and he soon returns with a stack of books. 
you pause, “yearbooks?“
he nods, “yeah, our school’s.” 
strangely enough, most of the covers are different than yours at home. 
but everything else is the same, like the name and logo. he pulls out this year’s yearbook and flips through before stopping at a page. 
“that’s me,” he points to the picture of him and you tilt your head, frowning.
“huh. so we are in the same year. but i’ve never seen you in my yearbook—or at school before. i swear i would’ve seen you at least once before...” 
you rub your temples, this whole situation was making your head hurt. none of it made sense. you study his picture, why in the world did he actually look good in his yearbook photo? your eyes shift toward his name, 
nish—
he turns the page before you can finish reading, only to get distracted by seeing familiar classmates in your yearbook. niki stays silent as he flips through pages and you continue to point out your friends and classmates and stare in wonder at the unfamiliar ones- 
ones that you’ve never seen before in your life but somehow their faces are printed on the page, in the same grade and same school as you. 
just like niki. you were actually speechless. 
eventually, he stops flipping eventually and looks at you. you catch his eye and glance down at the page, immediately catching on. you breath hitches. 
“no way—” 
“—and there’s you.” 
it is you. you can confirm, it’s a photo of someone who looks exactly like you. but… it’s not you. 
almost everything is the same, your face and clothes. your hair was cut shorter, and your smile wider for the picture. you were even wearing makeup, for crying out loud. you can only stare at the photo. 
according to niki, this you is dead? 
you look up at him, stomach churning. what in the world was going on? 
the silence lasts until niki finally speaks up with a hesitant tone. “i might be tripping, but have you ever heard of… alternate realities?” 
you shake your head firmly, “don’t even get me started on that-“
he cuts you off, “i know, i know. but just hear me out.” 
you have no choice but to internally whisper a quiet plea of help. he scoots closer, 
“wouldn’t it make sense? there’s really no other explanation. maybe it’s because i watched that spider-man movie recently, but you being from another world would explain how you’re alive right now—when in this world, you’re dead. plus, all the similarities and differences that you mentioned can be chalked up to different timelines—the butterfly effect and stuff like that.”
you don’t know what to say. 
could it actually be?
what other explanation could there be? 
“please say something,” niki mumbles and you release a breath you didn’t even know you were holding. 
“okay. okay. fine. say the whole multiverse crap is true. then how did i even get here? how did i—” 
you do air quotations, 
“—switch dimensions to another world?” 
niki shrugs, “no idea.”
he scratches his head, “it’s weird to think about but i mean, maybe there’s a reason why you came here.”
his voice suddenly gets lower and you shiver, “you know, the timing’s a bit weird that you showed up right after the other you passed away.”
you clear your throat, “let’s not think about that right now. we should probably focus on the whole me being dead thing, right?” 
“what?” 
you glance at him questioningly, “what?”
niki raises an eyebrow. “what’s there to focus on? you died.”
you don’t have to rub it in my face, you mumble under your breath. 
“shouldn’t we be focusing on how to get you back to your world?”
you roll your eyes, “sure, but still, i kinda want to know how i died? i think i deserve to, you know, so maybe i don’t make the same dumb mistake back home.” 
“-if you ever get home,” he corrects and you huff.
“whatever, just tell me. we don’t even know if your dumb alternate reality theory is right.” 
“okay,” niki rubs his hands nervously and you wait in anticipation. 
“well, it actually happened last thursday.”
you swallow. why was your heart rate picking up? 
“at school. on, uh, the rooftop. no one witnessed it, and the cctv was broken so we don’t have any exact answers. but from what I’ve heard,” he gives you a cautious glance, 
“the police are about ready to call it a suicide.” 
at first, you think you misheard him. but the hesitant gaze and pause proves you otherwise. 
at first it doesn’t hit you. but then suddenly you feel sick to your stomach. your hand grips the table for support as you try to take it all in. 
you? 
a suicide at school? 
what about your family, your friends-
“no,” you whisper, shaking your head.  “i… i would never-“
you slam your hands on the table, “i know myself. i would never do that.”
his face is grim and sympathetic, which you can feel the dislike churn in your stomach at that. “i’m really sorry… that’s the current situation. it kinda blew up at school, but everything’s still so recent that nothing is confirmed yet.“ 
unspoken words linger in the back of his head, that he questions if he should say it or not.  
that niki really didn’t know you that well, that you were just another classmate of his. one that he passed in the halls without a second glance back. that the you in his world-
was just a stranger to him. 
yet seeing you, desperate and alive, right in front of his eyes. he doesn’t know what to do or say. so niki watches you bury your head in your hands. and he waits. 
it’s only a couple of minutes later that you look up. his face morphs into one of surprise when he sees your determined expression. 
“niki,” you state carefully and he nods, waiting patiently.
“are you sure that i-i did it?”
you can’t bring yourself to say the word but niki gets it. he sighs, 
“no. no one’s sure. but from what i’ve heard, the police haven’t found any other motives so… a suicide seemed most likely.” the more and more niki talked, the more unsure he got. 
your face hardens. 
“so there’s no proof? the police aren’t doing their freaking job and investigating?” 
his eyes widen—surprised at your sudden outburst—and you sigh, voice falling to a whisper.
“did i really commit suicide? and why do i care so much?” 
something warm falls over your hand and you jump, glancing up.
even for only a split second, his hand covers yours in a sympathetic attempt, “i’m sorry y/n. i wish i had answers but i really don’t know…”
despite the awkward look on niki’s face and overall awkward situation, his words strangely comfort you. 
you bite your bottom lip. “i-i have to get to my house.”
he stiffens, “what?” 
you stare at him, eyes sharp, “if no one else is going to do something, i at least have to.” 
you need to. for yourself. 
niki scoots closer, “y/n, you can’t just-“
“i know. but i need to know. something just-ugh,” you rub your face in frustration, “something doesn’t add up. i have to check. it’s like i can feel it deep within me.”
he sits there wordlessly. when you don’t get a response, you stand up. niki splutters, “w-where are you going?”
you cross your arms, “without or without you, i’m going to my house.” 
he slaps a hand to his face in frustration. “just how stubborn are you?” he mumbles. you hear it and yet you decide to ignore him. 
“thanks for the help i guess,” you give him a (weak) half-smile before turning towards the door 
“wait! you’re being serious?!” 
his desperate voice calls out and you internally debate if you should listen to him or not. slowly, you turn back around, “yeah. do you need something?”
“no, but you do— a plan. especially since the police closed off your house for investigation. plus, most of the evidence would have been taken already.” he clasps his hands together behind his back.
you shrug. “okay, and? i’ll still find a way. i have nothing to lose. i’m not even supposed to be alive.”
he groans loudly and you raise an eyebrow.
“idiot. i’m trying to say that i’ll help you. i-i want to help you.”
“i didn’t ask,” you raise your hands in mock surrender.  annoyed, niki puts his hands on his hips.
“sure, but i know plenty of things you don’t. this is my world. so, are you gonna accept or not?”
“you wish you did,” you retort, yet you can’t help the small smile that grows on your face, “but… i would appreciate it. just be grateful that i’m accepting your dumb theory from a spider-man movie as of right now.” 
niki gulps at the sight. it was the first time he saw you smile since you met. at least, the first smile he saw from the you of an alternate universe. 
“whatever you say,” he holds out a hand, 
“miss imposter.” 
you take it gladly, harshly.  “don’t call me that-“
“my name is y/n y/l/n.” 
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you spin around in niki’s chair, having went up to his room to figure out your so called master plan. niki (respectfully) offered to let you stay in his room for the length of your “visit.” 
to which you almost punched him. 
but he explained that there were no extra guest rooms and you were still technically dead, so hiding in his room was the best bet as to not raise any questions. you could take the makeshift bed in the corner of his room as to not raise suspicion. you were surprised yet grateful. 
“i’ll grab extra blankets and pillows. and i’ll sneak you food and whatever you need.” 
“what about clothes and toiletries?”
he yawns, “easy. i’ll steal some from my sisters.” 
you feel bad, but you realize you have no other choice. you were literally stuck here. 
a part of you still wondered if this was a dream. a horrible one, at the least. but while you were stuck here, might as well make the best of it. niki graciously offered and you had no choice but to accept. you almost scoff at the ridiculousness of the situation. 
“so basically, i’m like a secret pet you’re hiding from your parents?” 
“technically… yes,” niki rubs his hands together, and you can only watch the mischievous expression grow on his face.
“but i like to think that you’re like eleven. you’re different—you’re special, like her.”
you hold back a laugh at the words. 
clearing your throat, you try to play it off. “from stranger things? your world has that show too?” he lets out a scandalous gasp and this time you giggle. 
“of course, dude. what kind of world would i be living in if i didn’t have stranger things?” 
“apparently a horrible one,” you snort. 
after the whole living situation was sorted out, you returned to your investigation. 
“so you’re saying the police taped off my house for further examination?”
“uh, yeah? that’s how it works?” he raises a brow. 
you stuck your tongue out at him, “okay,  smartass. then how do we get in?” 
“clearly, there’s only one way: sneak in.” 
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“i don’t think this is a good idea?” niki whisper shouts at you and you shush him. 
the sun was barely setting. if anyone knew you, they knew you really couldn’t be deemed as patient of any sort. 
niki watches you struggle up the tree in your backyard. 
obviously, going through the front door was a no go. luckily this house looked pretty much the same as your house, at least from the outside. you knew your parents weren’t home judging by the darkness.  you wondered if they were staying with other family. 
or were they at work? so soon after your death? 
you grimace, now was not the time to be getting in your feelings.
the best (only) option was jumping the backyard fence and going in through your bedroom window. leading to your predicament now.  
you exhale heavily when you find a place to rest, gripping the tree with all your might in hopes that you don’t fall 
you glance down at niki. 
“can you make it?”
he scoffs,  
“easy.” 
it was easy— easy for you to watch niki struggle to get up to your point. 
you were sort of scared the tree wasn’t going to support both your weights, at the way it was trembling slightly. niki makes it though, by the time the sun is well down. 
you can see him sweating heavily and your nose scrunches in amusement,“easy, huh?”
“yeah, for you just standing there and watching me. we don’t have all day, grandma.”
“don’t call me that,” you mutter while stretching out towards your window.
niki’s eyes widen. 
“be careful, y/n.” 
“i got it,” you stretch out a leg to the ledge and your sweaty hands begin to slide from the bark, most likely from exertion. 
without even thinking about it, niki places his hands around your waist to stabilize you. you don’t notice in your concentration to not fall to your death. you certainly didn’t want another dead you. 
your foot clicks the lock, and with a grunt you’re able to push the window open. 
“you got it?” 
“yeah,” you breathe out, clumsily making your way in. you reach out a hand for niki and he takes it, maneuvering his long body in through the small window. 
finally, you can breathe. 
it’s the first time you have the luxury to desperately wish that you were home right now. your real home. you certainly didn’t mean this home, the empty and cold looking one locked up for the police’s investigation. 
after catching your breath, you get up to examine your surroundings. you weren’t not sure what you were expecting. this was the other you’s room. 
all you can think is, at least this y/n was much cleaner than you. 
a part of you feels like you’re invading someone’s privacy. but then you realize that it’s literally your own privacy that you’re invading, with the addition of niki. you actually can’t believe the absurdity of the situation. 
at first glance the room looks pretty normal, an average teenagers room.  not what you expected for yourself, but there’s not much you can see. you turn to niki,
“there’s no shot we’ll get caught right?”
he gives you another sympathetic look, “we’ll keep a look out for the police, but i heard your parents were busy with your other family and funeral preparations, so it wouldn’t be them catching us.”
“oh.”
the air feels so glum, you clear your throat to move on. “guess we should look around?”
he nods and begins to snoop around.  
“wait,” you call out hesitantly. 
niki cocks his head and you cough awkwardly.
“it’s still my room, so like, be careful with what you look through.” 
he rolls his eyes. “yeah. i got it.” 
you gaze at the photos on your shelf, displaying your happy family and friends. it just made you acknowledge how precious they were. it made you miss your friends and family at home even more.  
you’re appalled at the books you read. you shake your head, seriously? you take out one of the books-
“ten days to love,” you voice aloud with disgust written across your face. 
you weren’t one to judge, but what kind of cheesy romance novels were you reading?  
niki opens your closet and you turn at the sound. your eyes widen- 
wait a second, 
your closet with clothes? possibly including…. more personal things? 
you dash over in desperation, praying that niki hasn’t already seen something that he shouldn’t. 
“don’t!” 
his wide eyes meet your panicked ones, shocked at the sudden change of events. he doesn’t move until you push past him, blocking the door from his view. 
“you didn’t see anything, right?” you stare at niki desperately and he furrows his eyebrows. 
“no? am i not supposed-“
“no reason. just being cautious. we can, uh, open it together.”
you carefully examine your belongings inside before deeming it safe for niki’s eyes. you let out a sigh of relief.
he gives you a weird look and you shoot him an exaggerated smile. 
“you can proceed!” 
he mutters something under his breath as you continue your search on the other side of the room. it didn’t seem like there was anything of importance on the shelves. but, after careful examination, you see a glimpse of something. pushing past some folders, your face morphs into a stunned one. 
you pull out… 
a pink teddy bear with hearts? why would this be in your room? 
and even more so, why was it hidden? 
niki calls out your name and you turn around. your mouth drops open. 
“a box of chocolates?“ 
he scoffs, “yeah. stuffed behind some clothes in your closet for some reason.”
“it’s not even the good brand,” you mutter. 
niki laughs, “maybe you had secret admirers from school?” suddenly, you give him a suspicious glance. 
“what makes you say that? you sure you weren’t one of them?” 
he side eyes you, “trust me, you wouldn’t catch me within five feet of you at school.”
you walk over to shove his arm and he only laughs harder. you huff, suppressing a smile on your face as you turn away. but you keep niki’s comment in the back of your mind. 
after a solid thirty minutes, you can feel your resolve waning. there was no sign indicating that you felt suicidal. at least, none that you found after the police probably scrounged through everything. some stuff was suspicious— 
like the teddy bear and chocolates. and some lavish perfume and makeup in the drawers. that just wasn’t your style. but you supposed this world’s you was just different. 
just because you weren’t particularly into those things didn’t mean another you couldn’t be. 
“did i have a diary? what about my phone?”
niki frowns, “the police would’ve taken it. it’s their evidence now.” 
you suddenly get an idea, and it’s probably wasn’t a good one. 
“hey, niki?” you call out. he hums in response.  
“what day and time is it, currently?” 
“uh…” he checks his watch, “sunday. 8pm. why?”
“when does the police station close?”
dummy, most people would say--why would the police station be closed?
luck seemed to be on your side, because you knew especially well from complaints by locals, that your local police station did actually have a curfew. and you could only hope it was the same here.  
niki scratches his head, “in ten minutes? why are-“
his mouth drops open, “no. no. no.” you shrug and he shakes his head adamantly, “y/n, there’s no way that we’re going to sneak in.”
you dust off your hands, “i’m all ears for any other ideas you have.”
you have him at that and he falls silent. after a couple moments, he speaks up albeit hesitantly. “well… i might have a way.“
you grin. “onwards, then.”
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“wait, so how did you manage to get access again?”
he coughs, “my friend jungwon is the son of the police deputy chief… so i may have called in for a favor.”
“he managed to sneak in with his dad’s keys and get the files to my case?” you finish.
he nods. 
“illegally?”
he nods again.
you tap your chin, “would we get arrested if we got caught?” 
he shrugs, “probably.”
“good thing i’m not from this world.”
perhaps secretly hanging outside this jungwon’s house was not the best idea, either. he rolls his eyes before offering the file to you.
“do you want to open it?” to your surprise, his voice comes out quite comforting and soft. 
you gulp, “i guess i should.”
you feel sick for the second time that day. luckily, the photo didn’t show too much. not that it made it any better. it was still you, dead. 
you had to look at yourself and imagine yourself in that situation. you cover your mouth and niki immediately takes the file away from you. he watches worriedly as you shake your head.
“i’m fine. i-is there anything else your friend managed to get?”
“are you sure?”
“yes.” he doesn’t protest anymore at the tone of finality in your voice. 
niki pulls out a bag with your name on it. taking a deep breath in, you open it. you shuffle through some things hurriedly until niki speaks up.
“hold on a sec,” he softly places a hand on your arm to stop your actions.
“we should be careful. someone could notice that we tampered with the evidence so we need to be very careful when putting things back. plus, we have to give it back to him as soon as possible—we don’t want them noticing that your stuff is missing.”
you curse, “that’s right. we can’t risk taking anything.” 
“then what?” 
you pinch your nose bridge, “we snap pictures and hope it’s good enough. unless we want to take another field trip here.” 
you manage to snap a few pictures and go through a few things. you catch a glimpse of your diary and flip to the most recent page. it was about a week and a half ago, and-
it wasn’t finished. you skim through it, reading boring stuff about how your day was and how you met-
you squint.
the rest of the words were scratched out, harshly, with a black marker. seeing how it was getting late and dark, you can’t make out who’s name it was even with your phone flashlight. you wonder, could it be-
your thoughts are interrupted by niki. 
“y/n, i think we need to hurry and head home soon. the longer we stay out, the greater risk we’re at for getting caught. oh, and i found your phone.”
he holds it up and the extremely glittery case makes your eyes hurt. you eye it. heaving a deep breath, you prepare yourself to open your phone. 
but when you click the power button and nothing happens, you groan. you try again, and again, holding it down for seconds but the screen remains black.
“the phone’s dead.” you sigh again and niki bites his lip.
“maybe we should give up. we can ask jungwon another time,” he suggests
you nod wearily and he closes the box. as he gathers everything, opening his phone to text his friend to come back out, you glance at the time. it was quite late for a school day. 
“that’s right, you have school tomorrow?”
he groans, “yeah. i guess you’ll just have to stay home in my room. no one will go in while i’m at school, so you don’t have to worry.”
you nod, “okay.”
it felt weird knowing you were supposed to be at home, in bed and preparing to go to school yourself the next day. instead, you were stuck in another world—in a stranger’s room, forced to hide since you were supposed to be dead. 
were you considered missed at home? did anyone notice? call the cops? 
more like, if anyone cared? 
while you get ready for bed in niki’s bathroom, you stare at yourself in the mirror. 
yes, you affirm, you’re alive. 
you’re staring back at yourself, dressed in one of niki’s oversized shirts and basketball shorts. 
but the image of your dead face flashes in your mind and you immediately squeeze your eyes shut. you breathe heavily, hands planted on the sides of the sink. 
everything’s fine. you will get back home. things will figure themselves out. you’re okay. you’re breathing and-
a knock on the door makes you jump.
“y/n? everything okay?” niki’s voice sounds out hesitantly, “it seemed like you were taking a while so-“
the door swings open.
you stand there, face emotionless. he doesn’t say anything, and neither do you. niki tries to keep the image of you wearing his clothes out of his head, but it won’t seem to go away.
“goodnight, niki.” 
you slowly walk over to the temporary bed he’s set up on the floor for you. he blinks, 
“night, y/n.” 
it’s surprisingly comfortable, or maybe you’re just so exhausted you don’t seem to care or question anything anymore. 
you hear light footsteps padding to turn off the lights. 
in the darkness, your eyes close. but your mind is awake.
you know his is too, judging by the sounds of quite shuffling every couple minutes or so.
“niki?” you say quietly.
another shuffle. 
“yeah?”
“this may sound weird, but have you noticed anyone that looked particularly sad?”
there’s a pause. 
“about you?”
“yeah, but not like the typical sadness. like, anyone who seems to have changed drastically after hearing about me? let’s say,” you swallow, “any guys or friends of yours who seemed particularly upset or affected?”
niki rolls to the other side of his bed so that he faces you, but in the darkness he can only see the outline of your figure. “y/n, what are you trying to say?”
you tug the covers over yourself a little tighter. 
“nevermind, niki. have a good day at school tomorrow, and don’t worry about waking me up. you won’t be able to.”
“wasn’t planning on it,” he snorts. 
you fall asleep with a faint smile still lingering on your face. 
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the next day at school, niki struggles. he struggles when it’s supposed to be another normal day, and all he can think about is you. 
especially about what you said.
niki never paid much attention before to his surroundings, there was no reason to. but now he keeps an eye open.
he eyed anyone who passed by your locker, empty desk in class, anyone who mentioned your name. but the fact that you mentioned guys specifically, made him confused. 
why did it matter if a guy was upset? a lot of people were shocked and sad at the news. niki shook his head. he didn’t get it. 
meanwhile, you stayed at his home.
thinking. 
thinking about yesterday. somehow everything that happened was all just yesterday. you took the train and ended up here. then you found out you were apparently dead. 
you spent what felt like hours scrolling through the photos you took and waiting for niki to come home. all while eating snacks that niki left for you graciously. 
you don’t even know what time it is when you hear the door begin to open. you scramble to your feet before realizing that there was a chance it wasn’t niki. 
you go back to your hiding spot, shrinking underneath the covers. next thing you know, the bedroom door flings open. you tense.
however, a call of your name allows you to let out a sigh of relief. you hop up, “niki!”
he grins, looking rather cute in his ruffled school uniform, backpack slung off one shoulder. you stop yourself, horrified at your thought. at your face falling, he cocks his head. “what’s wrong?”
you laugh awkwardly, “nothing! nothing at all!” 
he gives you an unconvinced look but doesn’t press further. 
“you must’ve been bored without me.” 
that was the niki you’ve come to know (in the span of a day or so).  sarcasm drips from your lips as you laugh dryly, “sure.” 
but you knew he was right and he knew it too. 
“i spent the day looking through the pictures, but i couldn’t find much else,” you frown. 
“same here. today was pretty normal, no one seemed any different than usual…” 
“i mean, the mood has been somber ever since you,” he pauses, “left. but nothing out of the ordinary.” 
you seemingly deflate, but niki perks up. “i talked to jungwon and he said he’s going to try and get your phone next time. we can only hope that someone charges it or that we can charge it ourselves.” 
you nod, “that’s good.” 
“but, don’t you have work to do? what about your family?”
you realized you didn’t see or even hear of them yesterday. 
“oh, they usually stay late at the dance academy—me included. but my grades haven’t been good recently, so they’ve been forcing me to go to home and study…”
you tsk as niki gives you a sheepish look. 
“you know, while we’re waiting, i’m not too bad at studying myself. what do you need help with?” 
niki rolls his eyes, “thanks, but no thanks. i don’t need another person on my back about my grades.” 
instead, he falls back onto his bed with an oof. 
“don’t worry, i’ll manage. let’s just talk about our next step. 
“step? as in, my case?
“yeah,“ his eyes glint, “i have an idea.”
you were starting to believe he was getting more invested in this than you were. 
“okay—shoot.”
what was the worse thing he could suggest?
“we should sneak you into school-“
your eyes practically bulge as you gape at him. “excuse me? weren’t you the one saying i was going too far with sneaking into my own house and you want me to do what?” 
niki gets up, placing his arms on your shoulders to calm you. strangely enough, it did. 
“hear me out first—we sneak into school at night, bust open your locker, and see what you have. that’s better than waiting for jungwon.”
“don’t you think the police would have already looked through my locker? 
“well, he looks around nervously, “as far as i’ve heard, the police were already mostly convinced the case was closed and didn’t care to check. but, what can i say? rumors are just rumors.” 
you purse your lips. what did you have to lose? being in a different world made you much more reckless than you would have ever thought. but that didn’t mean you were going to be stupid about it.
“fine.” 
niki winces at your tone, but you speak up,
“how in this stupid multiverse crap am i going to break into my own locker? and with cameras all around school?
he smirks and you raise an eyebrow.
“i didn’t miss a whole chem lecture for nothing—“ 
confused, you give him a look as if to say, what in the world are you talking about? 
“who said we had to know the combination?” he takes out a pair of keys form his pocket. 
you gasp in awe, clasping a hand over your mouth.
you gaze at him with wide eyes for a second, causing him to look at you questioningly. 
“you’re actually being smart...” 
his confused expression immediately changes to one of irritation. 
you stand up straight again, “how did you even get those keys? and what about the cameras?” 
he winks and you glance at him, trying to remain expressionless. if there was anything you noticed, it was that niki was actually quite attractive. it made you wonder if he was popular at school…
“it’s a secret. don’t worry about it.” 
“you sure have a lot of secrets, niki. like, is niki even your real name?” you squint accusingly. 
niki chokes on his spit, “how in the world did you know?” 
you falter. “huh? it isn’t?” 
he clears his throat, “anyway, i have to get up early for school tomorrow.” 
you eye him but decide to let it go. niki shrugs, “usually i’m up playing games, but you look like you need the sleep with those eye bags. you aren’t surprised.
“tomorrow night,” he says shortly after. “i’ve got a plan—you just have to trust me.”
turns out said plan was dumb, but you really had no other choice. 
niki made some lame excuse to his teachers about staying late to study- and his teachers, being utterly shocked that he offered to study, immediately agreed to let him linger. 
meanwhile, niki would sneak you in, wearing one of his old uniforms that was too small for him so that just in case, no one would question anything. along with one of his totally inconspicuous baseball caps to hide your face and hair. 
you sigh, you couldn't believe you were sneaking into school through the boys bathroom. you groan while maneuvering through the window. niki shushes you, causing you to stick your tongue out at him. he raises his hands playfully and you resist the urge to smack him. 
on your way to jump down from the window, your left foot gets caught on the ledge. you stumble forward, expecting to be met with the revolting bathroom floor face first. instead, perhaps now was the time to thank the universe (in this case, his universe?) for niki’s quick reflexes.
he inhales, catching you by catching and pulling you towards him instead of the ground, essentially into his arms. 
instead of faceplanting into the ground rather foolishly, you fall into his strangely soft and warm chest. you let out a barely discernible squeak, unable to respond due to the pounding of your heart. 
after a couple of seconds—that felt like forever— niki lets you go with a shake of his head. 
“my god y/n, i had no clue you were this clumsy. please don’t ever do that again.” 
please don’t ever make me sneak into a nasty teenage bathroom again, you wish you could retort. 
you shake your head quickly, lips pressed thinly together. don’t get distracted, you remind yourself.  “yeah-thanks. let’s uh, just hurry.“
you don’t have time to wonder what would the consequences be if you got caught by cameras or anyone else while niki leads you down the familiar hallways. 
“how do you know which one’s my locker? i thought you said we didn’t really know each other?“ you eye him suspiciously.
he scoffs, “don’t get too excited. mine’s just a couple lockers down so i was bound to see you at your locker by some point.” 
he hands you the keys and you gratefully accept—your hands slightly trembling. you didn’t know what to expect. 
niki watches from behind, and you can feel his warm breath on you occasionally, causing you to shiver.
with a slight click and creak of the rusty locker door, the locker opens. you hold your breath at first glance. it’s…. normal? 
normal as in any average high schoolers locker one would expect. what catches your eye first are a couple of photos of you and your friends. 
on deeper inspection of yourself (it was still weird to imagine and even weirder to see) you see a twinkling, intricate chain around your neck. maybe you were tripping (again, but mentally this time) or that necklace you had on seems really expensive? 
“there’s no way,” you suddenly gasp and turn to niki with wide eyes. 
“what?” niki starts to panic, “what is it?” 
“am i actually loaded in this world?” 
niki pinches the bridge of his nose as he shakes his head. “jesus, you scared me. i mean, you didn’t seem like it.. who knows where you got that super expensive, luxury brand necklace? it looks familiar…“ 
you try your hardest not to roll your eyes. of course, niki would know. 
“how much are you talking?” 
he taps his foot on the floor, “well, my mom and sister likes that brand. that specific necklace is specially made since it’s a seasonal limited edition, so it’s somewhere in the thousands-“
you truly forgot how rich niki’s family was, you think with a half joking tch and a shake of your head. niki glances at you, impressed. 
“-whoever gave that to you must’ve really cared.” 
you frown, “sure… or maybe i just really worked hard to get it for myself?” 
he’s shoots you an amused look, “you wanted to get yourself the valentine day’s collection necklace? 
“what?” 
you feel your heart rate begin to pick up, “are you implying what i think you are? 
“yes?” he responds with a raised eyebrow, “someone must’ve been really in love with you to gift you that. maybe your parents or friends?” 
then niki pokes your side playfully, “-or a secret admirer?” 
you don’t answer his question, regardless of if he was being serious or not. you peer into the locker again, “but where is it? it’s so valuable i’m certain we would’ve seen it in the police’s evidence…” 
suddenly, niki grabs your wrist. that’s when you hear the footsteps. you turn to him with wide eyes as he mouths for you to hide.  panicking, you look around in desperation before he pushes you—
straight into the locker. 
your own locker. 
you know you should be freaking out over getting caught, but you could only wonder—could this be considered a crime? 
in the dark, stuffy locker, you see a glimpse of niki’s silhouette run past through the tiny openings of the door. just barely a second later, you hear more footsteps. squinting, you able to discern a familiar, yet weirdly unfamiliar guy. your eyebrows raise. 
no way. park sunghoon was in this world too? 
you hold your breath when you hear him call out, “is someone there?” 
really, curse niki for shoving you in your own locker. yet it was also a smart move as no one could see into your locker, but you were able to see out. 
“sorry. that was me, pres.” 
it was niki’s voice. 
you can barely see his relaxed demeanor appearing to face sunghoon. 
“i was staying back to study and catch up on work—you know already,” he adds hastily. 
sunghoon nods coolly, “i was just checking. making sure everything’s good before leaving.” 
niki was a little too good at acting, you questioned how often he had done this to those around him. he fake salutes, “i promise to clean up after i’m done. no need to worry, class president.” 
“alright, see you later.” 
you have a sigh of relief as sunghoon turns to leave. 
but you swear, for a split second, his expression changes as his eyes fall on your locker. 
your heart rate picks up. did he notice you? 
however, sunghoon leaves without a second look back. 
you frown—what was that? 
after waiting a minute to be safe, niki quickly lets you out. only to be greeted by your displeased face and crossed arms. 
“that was the only thing i could think of in the moment!” he immediately defends himself. 
“seriously? i could’ve-like-“ you trail off and niki smirks.
“see? nothing bad would’ve happened.”
“doesn’t change the fact you stuffed me in my locker. it’s not even mine, for crying out loud.” 
“whatever. just be glad you didn’t get caught by park sunghoon, our school’s super rich, smart, and handsome-“
“i know him from my world. he’s irrelevant, let’s continue on.” you wave him off. 
you can’t help but compare him to niki. niki was way more genuine and… boyish in a way? he felt real. you preferred that. not to mention he had a much more tolerable presence, you supposed. 
everything else in the locker was useless. random crappy notes, perfumes and hand lotions, along with the pictures you already inspected were the only things that decorated your locker. no sign of that ridiculously expensive necklace. 
you rub a hand over your face in exasperation. “that’s it…”
one thought still lingered in the back of your mind. where was the necklace? 
“hey, y/n, i think we should get going soon. the lights are going to turn off soon-they’re automatic and we didn’t bring any flashlights.” 
you sigh. next time. 
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it feels like you’ve hit a dead end. by the end of the week, niki has caught up on his studies. you were surprised to find that he was quite dedicated to school, even if it didn’t seem like it. 
the days that niki came home with a pile of schoolwork and other duties, you went out to think—with one of niki’s hoodies and a mask on. but the times you spent with niki since you couldn’t go out much, mainly at night, were nice. 
tutoring him at subjects he was struggling in, learning new dances together (and learning how talented he really was), simply being around him was enough to distract you from your impending crisis. 
niki always came to keep you company and bring you food. you really were his eleven. 
niki was gaming while you sat off to the side, watching him play. you admired his side profile, the shine from the bright computer screen enhancing his features, the furrow of his eyebrow as he focused. 
he yells as his character dies and you can’t hold back your laughter, “you kinda suck-“
all of a sudden, you hear a knock on the door. 
“bro, you good? i swear i heard another voice-“
the door handle begins to turn.
you and niki share a look of panic. 
your first instinct is to dive and roll, underneath niki’s bed. you ignore the fact that it’s as dusty as you’d expect for a teenage boy’s room and hold your breath. 
“mom said dinner is ready. also, what’s with all the noise? it sounded like someone else was in the room with you.” a girls voice—niki’s older sister, you presume. 
“nope. just me.” 
you cringe at the fact that niki’s voice is octaves higher. it wouldn’t be that much of a problem if his voice wasn’t as deep as it normally was. 
“it was just probably the video i was playing.” 
“…sure,” you hear his sister’s footsteps as she leaves and shuts the door behind her. 
you let out an exhale of relief. 
“y/n?” you hear soon after. 
“under here.” 
you turn to see niki’s head peeking down underneath the bed. 
you meet his curious eyes. cute. 
“jeez.” he holds a hand out and you gladly accept it, letting him pull you up with ease. huffing, you dust yourself off. 
“jeez, indeed. who knows what horrors you’ve been hiding under there.”
“hey,” niki defends himself, “i’ll have you know i am a very clean person and don’t-“
“oh really? then what’s this?” you hold up the sacred item, jerking your hand back as he reaches out to snatch it. 
“hey! haven’t you ever heard of privacy?” 
he lunges again as you laugh, just keeping it out of his grasp. however, you feel the bed frame hit your legs, and you gasp. 
you fall back, niki over you on his bed. he must’ve underestimated his arm-span and overestimated yours. 
niki lands over you with a soft grunt, eyes wide. you peer up at him wordlessly. his arms catch him, but it’s still so close you can feel his hair tickle your forehead. 
is this what the movies mean when your heart… skips a beat? 
niki snaps out of his trance, “s-sorry,” he hastily gets up. you cough, trying to dispel the stuffy atmosphere. 
“so, uh, i had an idea.”
“yeah? what’s up?”
“i was thinking we look at the evidence again. i just want to double check something.”
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“come on,” you take niki’s hand. it was habitual by this point. 
“you got the charger, right?”
niki nods, taking it out of his pocket. 
it was risky asking niki’s friend to retrieve the evidence for you again, but you needed to confirm your suspicions. or, hit a dead end. 
when niki returns, carefully holding a plastic bag (and dinner, your grumbling stomach reminds you), your eyes zero in on one thing. 
“thanks. i know it must be hard for your friend to sneak behind his dad’s back like that.” 
“it’s fine,” niki shrugs, “i promised to buy him lunch for the next week.” 
you snort as you take out “your” phone and plug it into the charger. 
“okay. now we wait.” 
niki looks at you expectantly, and you only stare at him back. subconsciously, a hand raises to your face. “is there something wrong?”
he shakes his head while looking away sheepishly, “nothing, nothing.”
you open your mouth to question him further, but the phone screen flashes. you scramble to open it. thankfully you were able to use your own face id. 
as soon as you scroll through your messages, your stomach sinks. you raise a hand to cover your mouth. 
“what?” niki jumps up, “what did you find?”
you open the photos app, which only confirms everything. you drop the phone, and that’s when niki sees it. 
“oh my god.” 
“don’t even-“
“i was secretly dating park sunghoon?!”
you cup a hand over your mouth. “i think i’m gonna be sick.” 
niki scoffs, taken aback. “b-but how? you- and him-?”
you rub a hand over your face. “don’t ask me. but the valentines gifts and necklace were so suspicious, i started wondering… i just didn’t expect it to be him.” 
niki notices the sour expression on your face. 
“oh. you don’t like him?”
you shake your head vehemently, “bro, not even if he and i were the last two people on earth.”
you think about your world’s sunghoon and almost shudder. he was selfish, arrogant, could but would never keep a girl for more than two weeks. yet the whole class still loved him and you never understood it, never understood the appeal of him. 
besides getting bro-zoned, niki relished your words. 
“good to know.” 
“i wish i didn’t,” you sigh.
but that was besides the point. you still didn’t know how it all added up. did sunghoon—unfortunately, your boyfriend in this world—have anything to do with your death? did he really get you that expensive necklace? 
and as much as you wanted to deny it, you couldn’t rule it out. thinking as rationally and fairly as possible, suicide was likely-as much as you didn’t believe it. you couldn’t rule it out simply based on a feeling. plus, his expression when he passed by your locker lingered in your mind. 
“so, now what?” niki watches you carefully. 
“you’ve heard of the saying, keep your friends close but your enemies closer, right?”
“yeah,” he cocks an eyebrow, “why?”
“well, i’ve got a task for you.” 
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niki has never spoken a word to your friend group in his entire life. the most he’s ever done was send a cold look their way and pretend not to know them out in public. 
he had nothing against them—nothing against your choice of friends—but he preferred not to associate with your group. he couldn’t put his finger on it, but he just didn’t vibe with them. 
and yet here he was, talking to your “friends” because you asked him to. he sighed, the things he did for you. 
danielle looks him up and down with her arms crossed. “why are you asking about y/n? since when did you care about them?”
“please,” he sighs in exasperation, “i just need to know if anyone disliked y/n or was acting suspicious around them.”
haerin steps up, an annoyed frown on her face. “there’s no one. can’t you tell this is a touchy subject for us? now, leave us alone.” 
she grabs danielle and walks off, angrily whispering into a distressed looking danielle’s ears. 
niki wants to punch someone. besides the fact that surrounding people were catching onto his conversation and whispering about the interaction, he essentially got nothing out of it. 
you were also at a dead end. after scrolling through hundreds of disgusting texts and photos of you and sunghoon, there was nothing remotely suspicious. plus, you had to give your phone back to jungwon soon before anyone noticed it was missing. 
everything seemed normal. everything was normal. normal until this world’s you suddenly died. 
the only lead you had was the missing necklace. and yet where were you supposed to find it? it could be anywhere—in the police’s hands, with sunghoon, most likely gone. 
you couldn’t even go out on your own, you felt like a hopeless rapunzel trapped in her tower, desperately wishing for answers and freedom. it was starting to get to you. the stress, homesickness, and most of all, loneliness. 
you throw your phone to the side and bury your face in your hands, trying your best to focus on your breathing. you almost don’t realize how long it’s been until you hear a faint call of your name. 
“y/n? y/n, what’s wrong?” niki drops his backpack and rushes to your side. 
his eyes carefully examine your body, checking for who knows what. you slowly lower your hands, revealing your bloodshot eyes and tear stained face. 
what scared niki the most was the lost look in your eyes, a deep and dark pool void of any emotion. 
“niki… i don’t think i can do this anymore,” your words float out carefully, like a whisper of the wind. 
“i’m trying my hardest, but it’s so frustrating. i miss my home, i miss my life. i miss myself.” as soon as the words leave your mouth, you feel yourself break down. and right as you do so, niki reaches forward to wrap you in an embrace. 
“i want to go home,” you whisper in an small voice. 
his heart almost breaks at the sight. you sounded like a little kid—you looked like you were a little kid again, as small and curled up you were when he found you. in his eyes, he saw a lost child looking for their parents, their guidance and their own light in the world. 
he resolves to never be the cause of your pain again. 
niki holds you for the entire night as you cry and drift off to sleep. 
you wake up with a headache and a dry throat. you feel hungover, although you’ve basically never drank alcohol before. 
somehow, you’re not sure exactly when, you ended up in niki’s bed. as soon as you’re able to sit up, your eyes fall on the clock on the bedside table. 
11 am. niki must be at school still, you note. 
you wonder what he’s up to, if he was being a good student while you were stuck all alone at his home, skipping your own school. you wonder what life is like back at home. did time even pass? 
niki heads home as soon as the bell rings. he wanted to see you, to comfort you and reassure you. he wanted you to be okay. 
when he knocks on his own bedroom door and there’s no response, he frowns. all there’s left is a pink sticky note on his desk. 
went out for fresh air. don’t worry and don’t look for me. 
niki immediately drops his stuff and runs out. he goes to the train station, the bookstore. he even goes back to school, for crying out loud. 
he’s breathless and exhausted by the time he’s arrived back home. niki knows his family won’t be back. it was competition season, which meant the busiest time of the year for the other dancers. you were the sole reason he attended school at this time of the year, studying hard instead of skipping and dancing 18 hours each day. 
he’s scared. 
niki hasn’t felt this feeling in a long time—he can only recall the time where he was six and went to disney world. his older sister was pressuring him into riding one of the larger roller coasters, and he felt that sickening nausea fill him as he looked up at the towering structure. 
he almost gives up. he basically has, until he notices something strange. his balcony door is unlocked, and he always kept it locked for safety purposes.
tense, niki reaches out and slowly turns the handle. what greets him is certainly not what he expected. 
you sit on the balcony railing, hanging over the edge quite precariously with your feet swinging. one slight mistake and you would fall. 
you stare down at the passing cars, cloudy and dreary skies showing you it was soon to rain.
niki stares at you, and you turn around at the sound of the door to stare back, not a single word exchanged. 
then you finally break the eye contact, glancing down at your stilled feet. “i wasn’t going to do it.” 
he silently moves closer, hopping next to you on the railing as well. “okay.” 
you don’t see the tender way his eyes travel over you. your voice is quiet as you speak up, “you don’t have to say anything.”
“okay,” niki repeats. 
it’s not said in a sarcastic way. it’s not sad, either. it’s just..... soft. soft and understanding enough to make a blanket of comfort fall around you, to make it known that niki’s presence is here by your side.
suddenly, the rains starts and niki asks if you want to go down. you slowly nod and he helps you safely off the railing before opening the door for you guys go out in the rain. 
the rain doesn’t stop. 
and niki doesn’t stop either. he grabs your hand, dragging you along with him haphazardly. 
“where are we going?” you ask breathlessly. 
“out. like most people our age. we’re still kids.” 
“wow, i had no idea,” you mutter sarcastically. 
he holds back a smile of relief. good to know you were still your usual self. 
“you need a break. you’ve been so caught up in this case, you need to rest.”
“but-“
“come on,” he leads you on, “relax. it’ll give you a clear mind, so we can come back with a fresh start.” 
you’re hesitant until he pulls up at an arcade. “what if someone sees me? what if they-“
niki places a finger over your lips, silencing you. “we’re here to have fun like everyone else and not give a crap about anything else. now, are you gonna play or are you gonna get your butt kicked by me?”
a challenge was a challenge. 
you laugh at niki’s rambunctious side, yelling as he tries to cheat during competitive games and fight over the better toy gun. 
“just so you know, i technically won.” 
you playfully shove him, “in your dreams. you’re just saying that because you don’t want to-“
you get cut off by the loudest (and most embarrassing) grumble of your stomach. you both look down at your stomach. you look back up, petrified. 
niki almost cackles, “i guess that’s a sign.”
“it’s not my fault i fell asleep before eating yesterday,” you pout. 
“what do you want to eat?”
“anything. i’m serious.” 
niki watches with a fond smile as you quite literally inhale your food. 
“eat any faster, and you’ll make a new record.”
you flip him off as he laughs, putting more food onto your plate from his. you can only watch wordlessly, feeling your heart warm. after you finish eating, niki takes your hand again. you glance at him questioningly. 
“there’s one last thing i wanted to do,” he mumbles while avoiding your gaze. 
“how’s this one?”
you scrunch your nose in distaste at the sight, reaching to place red devil horns on niki’s head.
“i think this one fits you more.”
as he grumbles, you laugh. 
“fine, but i get to choose yours.” 
he ends up picking a frog headband for you—which you complain to no avail. his reasoning was, “you remind me of a frog. like the princess and the frog.”
you splutter, “but that means-“
“yes. i’m the princess.”
“obviously,” he adds. 
in the photo booth, you sit awkwardly. niki cocks an eyebrow. 
“i’ve never done this before, so…"
instead of teasing you like you originally assumed, niki only brings you closer. he wraps an arm around you while posing for the camera. you’re frozen, even as the countdown starts. you can barely manage a smile as the camera flashes. 
“what now?”
niki glances at the screen, “we still have three more pictures. what poses do you want to do?”
you’re at a loss for words. 
niki leans closer again. he makes a half heart with his hand as he looks at you expectantly. “how about a heart pose?”
“o-okay.”
you never felt so suffocated in that photo booth. and yet, you’ve never laughed harder. you’ve never been so happy in your life with someone else.  
“hey, this photo came out good!”
“but what happened to the first one?”
you both lean in to get a closer look at the photos that printed, and you end up feeling niki’s breath on your cheek. 
it was warm. it was nice to have someone so close to you and still feel comfortable. it was nice to know you were close enough to someone to feel that way. 
it was something you had never felt before. 
“..-y/n?”
“huh?” you snap out of your trance.
“i said, you can keep this copy.” 
you look at the pictures and then at niki. “what? no, it’s fine-“
“i said keep it,” he forcefully shoves the photo into your hand as he quickly heads over to the cashier to pay. 
you stand there for a minute, looking at the photos. you guys looked happy. you guys looked good…together. like you were a real couple, or something. you internally chide yourself while taking off your headband. what a silly thought, you brush off. 
on the walk back home, you feel utterly satisfied, humming as you match your pace with niki’s.
“when we arrive, i’ll let you in through the back, just to be safe.”
“whatever you say, mr. responsible.” 
he ruffles your hair and you swat his hand away in annoyance.
that night was the first night you’ve felt content. almost like you could stay here—like you belonged. you stare up at the dark ceiling, reflecting on the days events. 
“niki?”
you hear his bed shift. “yeah?”
“i just wanted to say thanks. for everything. you’ve been providing everything for me, all while helping me on my case. i’m grateful for everything. i don’t know how, but i promise to pay you back one day.”
“what’s with the sudden sappiness?” his tone is teasing, but light. he clears his throat to add, “but yeah, of course.”
“i dunno, i guess i’m just not used to this type of treatment back home.”
“what? what do you mean?” 
even in the dark, you can feel inquisitive stare on you. 
“i mean, i’m usually left on my own since my parents are working. and my friends, well, they’re nice and all…”
“but you don’t feel a true connection?” he finishes, and you roll over.
“yeah. i don’t really know what my friends are like in this world. who even are my friends? do i even have any?”
niki grimaces. 
“uh, yeah. i don’t know if they exist in your world, but have you heard of danielle? and haerin?”
“nope. what are they like?” 
he shifts again, and the bed creaks. “you see, i don’t really talk to your friend group. it’s nothing personal, i just don’t want to associate with them.”
“dang, maybe it really is just a me problem, in every life too.” 
you hadn’t thought about hanni and hyein since you got here. but danielle and haerin were two new leads. a new start, perhaps. 
now that you had more information from niki, you started your research again. specifically, insta-stalking. 
your specialty. 
niki hands you his phone with a suspicious look when you casually ask for it. you pray he doesn’t hear the sound of blood rushing in your ears or the pounding of your heart. 
as he goes to do his night time routine, you quickly tap on the instagram app and search up danielle’s name. it doesn’t take long for you to find her account since niki followed her. checking to make sure he didn’t come out of the bathroom, you scroll through her feed. 
and your heart stops when you see it. in the corner of a photo—a picture of her and haerin posing at school in front of their lockers. 
that’s your ridiculously expensive bracelet on danielle’s arm. you’re sure of it. 
you felt yourself grow nauseous as you quickly turn off niki’s phone as soon as you hear the door turn. 
“hey, are you okay? you look like you just saw a ghost..”
you blink and smile, peeking at him innocently, although the dread grows in the pit of your stomach. “huh? no. what are you talking about?”
“what were you doing on my phone?”
you look away sheepishly, “trying to see if i could call my mom?” maybe niki’s acting skills were rubbing off on you. 
“oh, and?” 
you shake your head, a fake grim expression plastered on your face. 
that night, you lay awake staring into the darkness. when you hear niki’s soft snores, you sneak over to his bedside table to retrieve the key. you know you shouldn’t, but you felt this was something you needed to do alone. 
you feel like you’re on the edge of the cliff, about to jump into the water. the adrenaline filled you, you were right there-
it was so close.
the next day, you have to pretend everything is okay. you smile when niki greets you good morning, even peck him on the cheek when he tells you he has to stop by the dance studio for the night. 
he visibly blushes, stuttering on his words, “w-uh, w-what was that.. for..?”
you shrug, “i’m just proud of you for getting your grades up. it’s your first time back dancing in a while so have fun, okay?” 
he nods, beaming as he squeezes your hand goodbye. as he leaves, your smile fades. it felt too normal. it felt too right to imagine having a life with niki, like this everyday.
and knowing what you knew now, it was wrong. it was wrong from the start, and yet you couldn't help yourself fall even deeper. you had to get back into the right mental state. you couldn't keep deluding yourself.
it was time to confront the truth.
you can’t believe you’re sneaking into through the school boy’s bathroom again. the locker key safely stored in your pocket, you find danielle’s locker. the same one from the photo she posted. 
this had to be the one. you can only hold your breath and hope as you unlock it. 
you quickly scramble through all the stuff, looking for the shiny bracelet. you don’t find it, but when you go to close the locker door in defeat, a crumpled up piece of paper falls onto the floor. 
you huff, taking it and opening it up. it’s a picture of sunghoon, you, and danielle, all smiling as you three posed for the camera. but it wasn’t just an ordinary picture—there was a big, red “X” scribbled over your face, with the words “finally done” written next to it. 
and hearts next to sunghoon’s face. 
horrified, you clap a hand over your mouth. 
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during a break at the dance studio, niki doesn’t expect to open his instagram app and see danielle’s instagram show up on his recently searched. frowning, he taps on the account. he never cared to pay attention to danielle, so why was her account the last thing searched up? 
just out of curiosity, he scrolls through her recent posts. 
and then he sees it. something that is so hard to miss. it’s so strikingly familiar. 
he rushes home. when niki bursts through the front door, he doesn’t expect to find you missing. and when niki notices his old school uniform and cap gone, his heart drops. 
you sit on the floor next to the lockers  with your head buried on top of your knees. you’re sure you could get caught, but you don’t care. 
the crumpled picture feels heavy in your pocket. 
you stay there, staring at the walls until you see the moon shining brightly outside one of the windows. you haven’t eaten or drank anything the whole day. you’re not sure how long it’s been. 
“y/n!” 
great, now you were hearing things as well? 
furious footsteps stomp towards you.
“why did you leave without telling me? you could’ve gotten caught-it could’ve been dangerous?!”
“n-niki?” your eyes widen. 
before saying anything else, he pulls you up to your feet. 
“why would you come to school without me?”
for some reason, his words sting. you cross your arms, “what? like i can’t take care of myself?” 
he groans, “that’s besides the point! if someone saw you—“
“i don’t care! so why do you care so—“
a sound from down the hall cuts you both off. you turn to niki in panic and he curses. “the custodian comes on weekends to clean.”
you hold back a yelp as niki grabs your wrist and pulls you along in the opposite direction. 
he pushes through a door and turns to the left. you don’t stop until you’re inside the.. natatorium? 
“why are we-“
“there are no cameras here, unlike in the school building. i thought you would’ve known that.”
after he speaks, there’s an awkward silence. 
niki sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “well, are you gonna tell me?”
you feel the frustration flow through your veins, “and what about you? you tell me why i have to let you know my every location? why i feel like i can’t take care of myself, l-like a sick, old dog who can’t go anywhere or do anything? i’m sick of it all!” 
“you don’t understand,” his voice raises,  and you interrupt him, getting closer and closer to him. 
“you’re right, i don’t. i don’t understand why you helped me in the first place. you say that you barely knew who i was, yet here you are acting like you care! like you cared about the dead me!”
at this point, his face is so close to yours, you can feel your breaths mix as neither of you back down. 
“i do care! of course i care! about you, standing right in front of me!” he clenches his fists. your eyes linger on a single vein on his neck that sticks out due to the intensity. the fire burning in his eyes, your trembling voices, it all makes you falter. 
you don’t know what you asked. you know the truth. niki always cared—more than cared. he always went out of his way to search for you, like the day on the balcony and today. he wanted to find you, he wanted to have you in his life, 
you realize it now. to put simply, he wanted you. 
and this was the first time you felt wanted. 
you don’t know what else to do, so you lean in and close the gap to kiss him. and if anything, niki immediately pulls you closer to him. 
when you break apart for air, his dark eyes still staring deep into yours, you think he’s gonna lean back in again. but you hear a faint voice sound, growing louder. your eyes both widen. the janitor.
without a second thought, niki pushes you. 
he does it lightly, although it’s still enough to make you lose your balance, and for a second you stare back at him, betrayal evident before you fall backwards—
straight into the pool. 
your eyes just barely peek open in the water, and then there’s a splash accompanying yours a few seconds later. 
he easily swims to you, cupping your cheeks and bringing your lips to his once more. it was a much different experience from just a few seconds ago. 
you stay entwined like that together, eyes squeezed shut, until you actually can’t breathe anymore and you have to smack niki’s arm. you both rise to the top, heaving water and air. 
after a few seconds of coughing and gathering your bearings, niki’s raspy voice fills the air. 
“at least he’s gone. i’ve always wanted to do that.”
you roll your eyes, splashing water back at him in revenge for pushing you earlier. “seriously? after we got almost got caught? we could’ve drowned!”  
you splash him again, “also, you could’ve given me a heads up!”
he grins, wiping the running water free from his face. “and where’s the fun in that?”
you shake your head in amazement, “you’re actually an idiot. i can’t believe you, niki.” 
“an idiot who saved us from getting caught.”
after returning home together, you sit and enjoy the peaceful silence as niki dries your hair. your mind can’t help but replay the last few moments, from finding the picture at school to kissing niki, and then finally get pushed into the pool. specifically, the kissing part. 
growing sleepy at the soft and warm feeling of niki’s hands running through your hair, you almost don’t hear him when he says, “all done.”
you thank him and he looks around awkwardly. 
“what is it?” you squint at him. 
“well, i wanted to apologize. i didn’t mean to make to feel that way. i was just really worried about you, and i felt hurt you didn’t tell me why you snuck into school again today. did you not trust me? did i do something wrong?”
you soften, eyes falling to the floor. 
“i’m so sorry, niki. i didn’t mean to lash out on you. of course i trust you, i just wanted to do something for myself for once. without needing your or anyone else’s help.” 
you exhale, “the reason i left today was for this—“ you take the damp, crumpled picture and unfold it as best as you can. 
niki’s hands fall to his side. “oh god.”
“it was danielle. she took my bracelet and i-i think she wanted my boyfriend. i know it has to be her.”
“w-what? but how?”
you shake your head. he goes to hug you. 
you feel tears brimming at the corner of your eyes, but you won’t waste any tears on her. you pull back to look at niki, with a determined expression on your face. 
“you have to catch her and make sure they get what they deserve.” 
niki stares at you deeply, “are you sure? because if you are, i won’t stop.”
he wonders why you say you and not we.
at that, you falter. 
“no. i never be sure because she is—was my best friend and i will always hold that guilt in me. but you have to do something about it.” 
niki’s hold around you tightens, “and what about you?”
you smile, albeit sadly. “you know i can’t stay here, hiding away forever. i don’t belong here. i already existed in your world, and at some point, i have to leave soon. i can feel it.” 
it was the same feeling as when you first came here. that day you felt off. the feeling that you don’t belong anywhere, but this time, you feel fulfilled. complete. like you were ready to go back home. 
“it’s not something i can explain, but i know it,” you look at him with determined eyes. 
and he looks back at you with pained ones. 
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niki is able to convince jungwon to get his dad to reinvestigate the case again. the picture is given up as evidence, and danielle and haerin are taken in. 
the day they confessed out of guilt, you and niki celebrate by sneaking onto your school’s rooftop. the same place where it all started.
it’s a cold and windy night, but you could care less about getting sick. because it was your last day anyway. 
you didn’t tell niki, but you had a good feeling—like the world was patting you on the back and saying, “you worked hard.” 
the two of you watch the stars, snuggled up and reflecting on how your lives came to be like this. wondering how far away apart your worlds were. 
you kiss niki’s cheek, wishing to remember the feeling of being in his arms forever. his scent, his touch, his warmth, you wish you could keep all of it. you smile at him, willing back the tears. 
“there was a reason i bumped into you that day, of all people. there was a reason you came into my life, and i came into yours, niki.” 
he bites his lip, “y/n... you changed my life. every day with you was better than the last.” 
if this was a dream, you wouldn’t want to wake up. you trace his face, so it will remain ingrained in your mind forever, even when you go back to your world. 
“what will happen when i leave?” you whisper. 
“how will you even get back home?”
you shrug, “i don’t know how, but i know that i will.”
niki laughs, “that’s the y/n i know.”
as he kisses you once more, a star falls across the sky. 
the next day, you find a ticket in your bag. a train ticket. 
you don’t recall having bought one, and you don’t question niki. you only ask him to take you to the train station.
while walking hand and hand, you reminisce on the past month or so. “will we still remember this once you go back to your world?”
your body trembles, “i don’t know.”
“then… will i ever see you again?”
you don’t want to meet his eyes, because you know you’ll cry. 
yes, you want to say. instead, you say, “ i don’t know.”
niki wipes a stray tear on your face. you don’t even know how you reached your stop already. 
“this is it,” he says. 
but neither of you move. 
“don’t worry, even if i don’t remember you, you’ll always be in my heart. we’ll meet in your world,” he reminds you while the tears start falling down both of your faces. 
“don’t forget that there’s another me out there to annoy you. you just need to search hard.” 
you sniffle, playfully pushing him away as you furiously blink away the tears that blur your vision. you needed to soak up the sight of him as much of him as you could.
“i promise i’ll find you again.” 
he holds onto you until the very end, until you slip out of his grasp once more.
crossing the platform into the train while giving him one last, slow wave was painful. the last thing you can think of is the fact that you never knew. you never asked for niki’s full name. his real one. 
you never knew niki’s name.
and then everything fades into nothing. 
that’s the last time niki ever sees you. the train passes by in a flash, blowing his bangs across his face while he tries his best to keep that fake smile on his face for you—all for you before you go. 
then, you’re gone. 
in those seconds as the train passes, niki knows exactly why he did it. why he helped you through all of it, through everything together. 
all because you were there in class. you never looked at him, but he looked at you. he saw all of you, everyday—even if you didn’t know it. all your quirks and habits that he couldn’t help but find cute. you made his days interesting. 
but he was the coward for never approaching you. that was his fault because one day, you weren’t there anymore. 
and he had to pretend like nothing happened. on the outside, that’s how it was. even if he felt the slightest connection, tiniest pull towards you, you were still strangers. 
you were strangers until you knocked into him on the train platform. 
niki had to be selfish. he thinks it could have been fate that he saw you again, but now he’s just left with the lingering regret and feelings. those memories flash past like the train does. they come and go in the blink of an eye- a split second. 
when the train is gone, niki frowns and wonders why he’s standing there. 
he also wonders why it feels like there’s a piece of his heart missing. 
after that, he attends your funeral in his world. it was an open funeral to everyone who wanted to come- classmates, friends, and him. niki didn’t even know you that well, but he get this unexpalaniable urge that he should go- he needs to go. he brings flowers and gets to see you one last time. 
when niki sees the picture of your serene face, he can’t help but get this sense of peace, like everything’s resolved. 
and then he’s free.
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epilogue...
you sigh, trudging along the walkway on the way to work. looking at your surroundings, you were getting major deja vu. but at this point, you were used to having episodes like that. 
there were many, many times where some things simply felt so familiar. but it was like your memory was wiped and you couldn’t remember why. some times you had flashes of an adventure, a feeling of mystery, a boy. 
ever since some day in high school, it just happened. and from then on, you’ve always felt like something was missing. or wrong. you can’t tell. it became a part of you, to the point where you almost forgot about it. that feeling of misbelonging, being just out of reach. it’s strange, like a weird occurrence that makes you want to open your third eye or whatever to find out more.
even after graduating, it never left you. 
you being so lost in your thoughts, fail to notice when you bump into someone coming off the train you were about to get onto. 
“i’m sorry,” you quickly apologize, but you soon falter when you meet eyes with sparkling brown ones. weirdly enough, they draw you in. 
they were familiar, you’ve certainly seen them somewhere. the moment lasts for a while, with the two of you standing still in the middle of the passway, staring at each other.  
you slowly smile, extending a hand. “i apologize if i’m mistaken, but have we met before?”
he stares at you too, confused yet enthralled. 
“i-i think you may be mistaken,” he starts hesitantly and you begin to apologize. 
“are you sure?“ you quickly introduce yourself, “and you?”
you swore you were not such a desperate person, but you couldn’t help it, not this time and definitely not in front of this particularly alluring guy.  
“me?”
he takes a quick glance at you before taking your hand with a small smile. 
“my name is nishimura riki.”
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first i wanted to say thank you for reading! this was a rough time coming, and i wanted to apologize for the long wait. this has actually been a wip of mine for years and i finally was able to finish it with riki after months and months of writing. this past year has been the worst one so far, but i'm just grateful to still be here. just feeling super appreciative for those who stuck with me and waited patiently. thank you. can't wait to see you guys again soon with the next oneshot (hint hint)!
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hoshigray · 6 months ago
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HOSHII MY LOVE this is gonna be my first ever request to you 😕 i usually refrain bc i get shy but im so touch deprived rn i NEED YOU TO (only if u want to no pressure pookie) MAKE A LIL MAKEOUT DRABBLE with literally any character plsplspls its carnal atp i love u
-🍓
𝐚. 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: the way i wanted to make this a multi-post, but i've been thinkng this exact scenario w/ toji for the past week, it needs to get out of my head!! i appreciate you entrusting you're first req w/ me awwww ;w;
⊹ 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: Toji x afab/fem! reader - suggestive content; minors DNI - kissing/making out - dry humping/grinding - thigh riding - fluff yet...suggestive - grinding - thigh riding - fingering (f! receiving) - pet names (angel, baby, princess, sweetie) - Toji and you being touch starved - implied reader is toji's partner who looks after Tsumiki and Megumi (yes, I'm feeling soft, shut up) - mention of spit.
⊹ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 1k
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After swaddling Megumi to sleep, you slowly put him in his cradle. The year-old baby snores silently as he leaves your arms’ warmth and lies in the comforting chill of the sheets. You then move silently to tuck in Tsumiki, the toddler sleeping in her tiny bed. You kiss her forehead gently, making her smile unconsciously. After saying a hushed goodnight, you close the door.
The plan was to stay until the kids fell asleep, stopping by your boyfriend's place for a night since it's been a little while since you last saw each other. Work’s been keeping you away for a minute, and stopping by at his apartment was needed to happen before you crash out from stress. And seeing the little ones’ faces was the cherry on top, their wholesome beaming faces instantly fueling your social battery. 
After silently walking out of the hall, you enter the living room, where your boyfriend stands by the chair with your bag. You smile pleasantly, teetering your way to him. And he, Toji, smirks at you, straightening a bit when you’re close enough. “Gotta go,” you say with a whisper. “Better catch some sleep before heading back to the office tomorrow. Megumi should be out till morning, so you should sleep easy tonight.”
“Thank Christ,” he makes you giggle, hushed not to wake the children.
The silence pushes you to look at him, your heart skipping at his forest green orbs already latched onto your frame. You cough faintly before grabbing for your purse. “Need anything before I go?”
A hand grabs your wrist to pull, and Toji impersonates thinking to himself while his hands snake to your waist to draw you closer. You roll your eyes – knowing what game he’s playing – but the smile on your face doesn’t falter. He then says, “Mmm, only one thing comes to mind.”
“And what would that be?” You quirk a brow, but your expression changes once he brings his face inches closer.
“I’m still waiting’ fr’ my kiss.” His gruff tone is dialed down, but his words affect a warmth to coarse through your chest.
It’s hard to say no when Toji’s nose brushes yours, lips hovering over yours, and your eyelids closing on their own. How long has it been since you’ve been close to him like this? You can’t even remember, work corrupting you for so long that this moment feels a little surreal.
“Hmm?” He teases you with a kiss on your cheek, and you shiver at the contact. “A guy can’t get a goodnight kiss before seein’ his baby off?”
You bastard… Holding back is futile when he kisses the corner of your lips, your hands cup his face, and bring him to your lips properly. He groans, the both of you sighing as your hands wrap around his neck.
You break the kiss, knowing it isn’t sufficient for you both. Toji licks your bottom lip, and you whimper as he kisses you again, a soft noise resulting from the withdrawal. “Toji—Mmm,” scarred lips claim yours once more, this time with more hunger. “I have to go…”
Your words aren’t acknowledged, not when he chews on your bottom lip — a signal for more access. Fuck, your resolve dwindles with the insertion of his tongue, almost going weak in the knees. But before that, Toji smoothly picks you up, and the sudden shift has you yelp.
“Stay with me,” Holy shit, the way he was looking at you caused your stomach to do flips. So entranced that you don’t realize he is walking to the couch to place you down on your back, crawling above you. “I missed you. Just tonight, sweetie.”
Liar, you know he wants you here for more precisely because that’s what you wish. But, “I…I can’t, I have to go—Mmmph…!”He slammed his mouth to yours again, nibbling on your lip until his tongue was let back inside your mouth. You moan, his leg propped in between yours, bumping his knee to your groin, which has you screaming silently. “Ahhnn! Toji, not there!”
“Shhh, relax, angel,” he coos, using a hand to massage your skull affectionately. He moves his knee, and you’re practically grinding on his thigh with a chewed lip.
“I can’t stay,” you’re hushed by his lips again, and your hips move on their own. “I have to go…Ohhh.”
“You say that, but look who’s ridin’ my thigh.” His chortle is low, and your stomach does knots. Toji moves your legs so he can be nestled between them, and kissing your neck melts you under him. “C’mon, princess, ya know I can’t let you go like this.”
Your brows scrunch together at him sucking your skin, legs coming around his waist as you hump into him. Toji does the same, rocking his hips to you perilously, the groin of his sweats grinding onto your bottoms, covering your throbbing chasm. God, it felt too good to stop now, your hands roaming inside his white wifebeater to purchase. 
He kisses you again, spit covering your soft lips, and you whine as he teases and sucks on your tongue; your breath hitches while his free hand slithers down inside your bottoms, and a shaky shriek is prompted by his fingers pushing into your panties.
“That’s right,” he coaxes you between pecks, loving the way your hands scratch on him. “Gonna treat ya right t’night, angel—”
However, the fun stops once you two hear the sound of a door crying, sniffling, and cries getting louder as they approach closer. It was Tsumiki, the poor girl shedding tears through her drowsy state. 
“Miki?” You call to the toddler; Toji quietly moves off you so the little brunette can come running into your arms. “Can’t sleep, sweetie?” She nods and burrows her face into your chest. You kiss her temple, “Must’ve been a nightmare.”
Her father hums and ruffles his daughter’s hair, chuckling when she swats his hand away. Toji then leans to your ear, “I’ll get the bed ready.” A mild glare meets a naughty grin before he gets up to his bedroom, leaving you on the couch to soothe the crying child back to sleep.
So much for sleeping easy tonight…
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© 𝐇𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐲2024 – reblogs and comments are appreciated wholeheartedly ✩ dividers by @/benkeibear.
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is-nini · 9 months ago
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Men who play with your life, knowing they have power, money, and the ability to.
Character: Wriothesley, Geto, Ayato, Nanami, Diluc, Zhongli, all your possessive business big husband<3
Warning: Overstimulation, size kink, yandere-ish behavior, possessive behavior, dumbofication
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Started when he notice you being a bit messy then usual.. "Princess, clean up after your play things" you would do it but almost with a pouty lips drag your leg and clean it up. Those are just simple things, because it progresses.
"Did you play with yourself?" He asked almost breathlessly. You shrug and keep watching the television "When I ask you something, you answer it" his eye narrow down at your figure.
You felt the shiver but you try to ignore it, afterall your new friends told you that it's okay to be a little harsh once in a while-it "gave your partner a rush" they say.
He won't let you go with that bratty act of yours. Who taught you to act like that? He always raise you so nicely, so submissive.
He started to track your every single move. After he found out your little friend group that has just been feeding wrong things to you small pretty head. He decided that maybe you are not ready for the big world. Stupid, small girl like you should be protected all times and not be seen by the mean people that are just trying to take you away from him.
Oh well, it seems like it's time to cut you off for a while and remind your place. Who you belong to.
Couple of days after he "Take care" of your friends, he came home to you sitting on the small stair step in front of the front door, your lips are pouty, eyes puffy and face flushes red- oh how he misses that look of yours. It doesn't take a genius to know that you have been crying. Little sniffle pour out as you grasp your phone tight, cute chain dangling softly as your hand tremble.
"What's 'wrong baby?" he feign worry even though he knew exactly what's wrong. "M-my fr-friend-" he hugs you immediately, shushing you "Shh It's okay baby, calm down and we'll talk when you're ready okay?" he picked you up and bring you to the dining table. He sat you down and looked at the food that you have made.
Although he can ask for maid or chef to cook for him but he likes it more if you cook it. You always look so breedable and cute in those little apron while you focus on making a food for him.
He took a soup that you made and pour it to two bowl, feeding you some food himself. He took out your favorite drink from his work bag and put it in front of you. Your eyes immediately lights up and chug the whole drink, quenching your thirst. "Slow down princess" he whisper while playing with your hair lovingly.
After your hiccup dies down and the shine on your eye shimmer in a happier light, he brings it up again, pretending as if he knows nothing and are curious. "I-I want talk" you said. He cooed internally letting you spill what horrible things your "Friends" did to you. "A-and- they are my few friends- now I am alone" you whimper and looked down.
He take the chance to cups your face and smile at you "Baby, you will never be alone. I am here always for you" he took the time to put his hand and softly stroke your hair "B-but when you are working I am alone.." you whine softly. He hums and put his chin on top of your head. "True, it's not fair that I am busy but you're not right princess?" you nod and letting out a small "yes" as you hug him tightly.
The night ended with you hugging him tight like a koala and fell asleep. He pick you up and puts you on the bed. He washes and clean after himself and on he bathroom he got an idea.
The next day you find yourself as usual, engulf in your lovers arm. You slowly wakes up and cleans yourself as you make your way to the kitchen to cook your lover's meal.
Minutes later, the sound footsteps approaches you and a hand wrapped around your waist.
"Good morning my little princess" you can feel his soft smile as he looks over your shoulder. "How cute, my little wife is making a cute bento for me?" You giggle and enthusiasticly say "yes!".
The cute moments doesn't last though, as he place kisses all over your neck, his hand going down, slipping into your short pyjama and rubbing your pussy oh so softly.
You let out small moan and tighten your thighs, trapping his hand. He pulls away and spin your body as you now faces him. The stove are turned off but oh he is so turned on.
Next thing you know, your body was bend over the counter. His trust are hard as you beg for him to slow down but all he's hearing is faster. "A-Ahn! O- Please! Ha- S-slower!slower! Ngah!" he grunt and went faster as he hold your waist tightly. Mouth drooling, eyes seeing starts, tongue out and your breast jiggle up and down as your nipple once in a while graze the cold counter. "Fuck- cute fucking wife. will fill that stomach full huh?" he whisper as he makes sure that his cock stayed for a while inside you before hitting that spot again with hard and sharp thrust.
Your body tremble as it has been your fourth release. You squeal as your pussy clenching around him. His second release fills up your stomach, making you feel so so full. He puts his hand to your stomach, dick bulging out of your stomach. As he presses, he can feel his cock moving in and out and it brings him to his third cum.
Drips of cum are dripping to the pool of your feet. White rim form around his cock which is still on your pussy. He hugged your stomach so tightly, feeling his cum inside your stomach. Your body trembling with your shakey leg.
He kisses your cheek and slowly position you comfortably before picking you up koala style all the while his cock is deep inside.
Big arms protecting you from outsiders, it is dangerous afterall. He slowly lays you down and pulls out his cock, letting the cum flow out. "Ngh - where are you going..." you whine out, feeling the emptiness. He smiles and kisses your lips while softly patting your head.
"I'm going to take care of you baby. No worries" he kisses you once again before you felt a soft sense of tissue graze your skin softly. You hum in content, going back to relaxing.
He smiles at you, looking at your sleeping state before cleaning himself up and preparing the little present for you.
You woke up, feeling cold. You sat up slowly looking for your husband. "H-hubby?" You called out, slowly walking down the living room. "Princess come here" his deep voice makes you walk to him like a magnet "I have a surprise for you".
You immediately perk up and looks up at him. "Y-yes?" You hum, he pulls out a small box with some little hole and gave it to you. "What... Is this?" He sat down while pulling your waist. "open it dear, but becareful, it's sleeping" you ponder on his word while slowly opening the box, revealing a cute kitten sleeping away. Your face break out to a huge smile as you slowly took the kitten, careful as to not startle it.
"You have a friend how princess, so when I go to work, you can be with oscar for a while all the while waiting for me okay?" He softly said. You nodded happily as you kisses the kitten softly.
You may think that you are lucky to have a nice husband - little did you know all the misfortune that befall you is the cause of him.
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driaswrld · 1 year ago
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lovers rock — gojo satoru and geto suguru.
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wc : 2.7k
summary : over a bottle of ill-gotten vodka, the trio has a tipsy conversation about kisses.
part of : the star paradox collection.
(comment if u wanna be tagged for tsr!!)
notes : this is heavily based off the fact that reader DID in fact have secret feelings for geto and gojo but never said anything ab it until before the star plasma incident (fic ab that coming soon dw) you may interpret this as reader fell first, they fell harder bcus that's exactly what happened fr
other : satosugu makes fake IDs (based off that one fanart), literally underage drinking??? toru cant hold his alc but wbk this, suguru smokes here too, suggestive convo, mentions of like one curse word i think
current casette : lovers rock - tv girl (anything by tv girl is a tsr song okay?)
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The dorms at Tokyo Jujutsu High operate on one solid rule.
All lights out by ten, no exceptions, no buts, ands, ifs or becauses. Curfew is at ten, be in your damn room by ten.
Naturally, Satoru and Suguru mistake ten for twelve.
It’s 9:53 when you walk into your dorm room, and the first thing that greets you are hushed whispers and a smoky smell.
Why is it so dark in here?
From your place at the door frame, your eyes flit to the back of Satoru’s head, silver white strands tickling his nape, uniform replaced with a blue hoodie. Suguru’s sitting across from him, slouched, cross legged like Satoru, hair tied into a ponytail and lips twisted into a thin scowl.
“—wasn’t yours.” Suguru grumbles beneath his breath, a pair of dice clinking softly in his palm, the light from your bedside lamp giving you a sneak peek of the numbers resting.
Three and six. Oh, no, that's definitely five.
“Cost me six hundred yen to get it.”
Satoru seems to ignore him, letting out a huff in defiance.
Suguru grunts, leaning over the side of the bed to pick up a half smoked cigarette, pressing it softly against the edge of your favorite incense holder to collect the stray ash.
“Broke ass.” Satoru mumbles, and though you can’t see his expression from here, you know he’s rolling his eyes. “Freeloader.” Suguru counters, cigarette lodged between his middle and index, and he brings it up to his lips and draws in softly.
He leans forward to drop the dice on Satoru’s leg.
“We’re supposed to split it equally.” You hear a clinking noise coming from Satoru’s lap.
“Like hell we are.” Suguru scoffs, a wisp of smoke leaving his mouth.
“I should get first share, it’s only fair.”
Suguru gets up from the bed, back turned to you as he slides the window open halfway. “We’re not sharing anything.” He flicks the cigarette outside. “I don’t know where your mouth’s been—”
“You tryin’ to fight—”
“Are you two getting high in my room?” Your voice makes them both freeze, and Satoru folds over the bed backwards, head upside down and staring straight at you with a guilty grin, all while Suguru is discreetly trying to fan the rest of the cigarette smoke out the window.
“What gave you that idea?” Suguru murmurs, squinting his eyes to make out your expression in the dim light with a faux innocent smile.
You breathe a chuckle, dropping your bag by the door and clicking it shut behind you. “How did the studying with Nanamin go?” Satoru asks, as if you can’t see him folded over the bed like he’s hiding something while Suguru fans the smoke through the window.
“I fell asleep halfway through, we got boba with Haibara instead.” You say, feeling blindly on the wall for the light switch.
“And you didn’t bring some back for me?” Satoru gasps, near offended.
“Don't change the subject,” you roll your eyes, pinky finger bumping against the light switch, and you flick it upwards with your index. When the light comes on and you face them, your jaw drops.
“Surprise…?” Suguru’s cheeks puff up in a wide thin lipped smile, almost mockingly. Satoru is still hanging off the edge of the bed, cigarette ash curdled on your incense holder, the pair of dice laying on the bedsheets and sure, they kinda made a little mess of your room.
But it's the bottle of vodka sitting between Satoru’s legs that takes the cake.
“You have to be kidding me—”
Suguru shrugs his shoulders, sliding the window fully open, the night air wafting inside.
It's almost curfew. And here they are. You're not even surprised, this is totally in character for them. “Wow, no, Satoru, you're such a rebel?” Satoru kicks his legs back and forth, voice mimicking a girly pitch. “Bad boys are so hot! Tell me all your secrets, toru-kun! None of that?"
“I was there too, idiot.” Suguru grumbles, shoving one of Satoru's legs aside as he steps over to the bedside table to grab the ash covered incense holder.
Satoru flails his legs like Suguru just smacked him, ever so dramatically. “How did you do it though?” You ask, with a near wince, exasperated but curious.
Unexpectedly, Satoru swings the vodka bottle sideways and into Suguru’s arms, the glass making a soft set of clink! sounds from Suguru’s rings as he catches it, both your eyes going wide as Satoru stands on the bed, striking some sort of elaborate pose.
“The date, June fifteenth ‘06—”
You turn to Suguru, confused but he only shrugs in response. “My assistant Sugi-san and I walked into Shinanoya—” Satoru continues his elaborate presentation, meanwhile you and Suguru whisper between his words. "Never call me that again—"
“So that's what you two were doing while you were supposed to be exorcising that curse?”
“He forced me to go along—”
“With these!” Satoru pulls out a mini plastic card, which is supposed to look like an ID, but really it's as flimsy as a piece of paper. You had to admit though, they really did get his good side in the picture. If he even has a bad side, that is.
“And we got the liquor at half price.” Suguru mumbles as you nudge him, and he pulls out his own fake ID, which looks the same as Satoru’s — you think you might want to print these pictures for a scrapbook or something some other time.
“I thought you said it was six hundred yen!”
“I added my service charge.”
“Service? What are you, a whore?”
You take the bottle from Suguru to feel the weight in your hands, and the liquid inside sloshes a little to the side.
Out of sheer curiosity and despite your better senses, you mumble, “Let's play a drinking game then.”
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Forty minutes later.
It's drawing near to eleven. The lights are turned off and all that's coming from your dorm room are the sounds of yours and the boys’ whispers and hushed giggles from time to time, barely drowned out by a soft song playing from Suguru’s phone, playlist laying open on his phone, one of Satoru’s picks.
Are you sick of me?
Would you like to be?
“—turn it to your head if you can't answer.” Satoru grins, cheek resting on his palm as he lays across the bed. “Have you ever gotten freaky with a milf?”
A chortle leaves your mouth when Suguru twists his lips into an expression of shock and utter disgust, and you have to cover your mouth to not laugh out loud.
“A milf? Like… forty or something?”
“Not really — just like a hot older woman.” You say.
“Oh, she was around that age then, I guess…” Suguru grumbles, clutching the half empty vodka bottle in one hand, eyes squinted. “I didn't sleep with her though— I don't just… sling dick around like Satoru— I have morals.”
“Says the one who sucked tongue with an elderly woman.”
Suguru scoffs and takes a swig from the bottle, passing it over to you.
You shrug, coming to Suguru’s defense with a mumble. “I mean, Satoru… you are common—”
“Don't pretty it up, he's ran through—”
“Like hell I am!”
The three of you fold over in a fit of laughter, gasping for air, faces hot from the alcohol and the sheer idiocy of the moment.
It takes all your energy to muffle your combined laughs, and Satoru leans over Suguru’s phone to increase the music volume just a little, lightheaded and nearly knocking the vodka out of your hand, mouthing the lyrics with a lopsided toothy grin.
You like a pretty boy
With a pretty voice
“Your turn.” Suguru nods to you and the liquor in your hand sloshes to the side. “Make it good—”
Satoru tries to interrupt but has to cover his mouth to stifle a laugh when you take a whiff of the vodka, head tilting back and mouth forming an ‘o’ shape — sure, you three were already a little tipsy, but you’re pretty sure this is way past your limit.
Not like you could hold your alcohol anyway.
Suguru was the only one who could survive, you and Satoru were certified lightweights by default.
“Dare me to do anything and I’ll throw up on you.” You huff, and both boys raise their arms up in surrender.
It’s these things, small moments like these that make you want to live forever.
Minus the aging part, or maybe with the aging part — if it meant doing stupid stuff with Satoru and Suguru, young or old, you’re sure you’d have no complaints.
Because it’s them.
“You scared?” Satoru chuckles, drawing you out of your thoughts.
The way he says it, in that tone – it’s the same tone that would make you follow him anywhere.
The same tone that makes Suguru roll his eyes so far in the back of his head you’d think he had a leading role in The Conjuring.
“Should I be scared?”
It’s paired with bated breath, and the way Suguru looks up at you, dark eyes glazed over with a hint of inebriation, waterline bordering on crimson from the lit cigarette tucked between his middle and index – it makes you feel naked.
In a way you’ve never felt before.
“That depends,” he murmurs. You gulp. It’s like the air in here has changed, foggy with a foreign feeling surrounding you three. “Do you wanna be scared?”
Suguru takes a deep inhale of his cig, leaning over to breathe out a plume of smoke. You and Satoru inhale it like you’ve neglected oxygen your whole lives.
Maybe if it were anyone else you’d call it want. Or need.
Something in your soul tells you it transcends that.
She might want a kiss before the end of the song—
“Suguru—” His name doesn't get the chance to leave your mouth entirely, Satoru’s thumb and forefinger already have your chin in his grasp, turning your gaze to him instead.
“What’re you looking at him for?” Satoru mumbles, and you hear Suguru stifles a laugh across from you.
“You think he’s gonna save you?”
You want to laugh, it’s a running joke anyway.
No matter what, you run to Suguru to put Satoru in his place. That time Satoru got you kicked out of a movie theater, or the time Satoru tripped you up during a mission in front of the first years, or the time Satoru ate the cheesecake you hid in your mini fridge —
Whenever little name gets her strings pulled by Satoru, she goes running off for Suguru to save her, right?
But it doesn’t feel like he’s talking about that.
“You need me to save you, name?” Suguru chuckles, and from the corner of your eye, you see him pull his hair loose, dark strands cascading over his shoulders.
“Gonna let him call you weak like that?” He chides, and the cool pad of Satoru’s thumb taps against your bottom lip twice, as if challenging you to say something – to give him your attention instead.
“Nah, don’t need a hero.” You whisper, a soft laugh leaving your lips. “Toru might though.”
Suguru bites back a snicker, head tilting back as he draws in another inhale of smoke. “Aw, don’t bully him, name.”
Because love can burn
Like a cigarette
“C’mon, don’t look at him,” Satoru tilts your head in his grasp, a soft grin forming on his face, dimples on showcase. “Look at me.” He whispers, tugging you closer, and you have to tighten your grip on the neck of the bottle so it doesn’t slip, your palms sweating from the proximity.
“Satoru—”
“Don’t double back now, you laughed a bit too hard at me just now, y’know?”
You open your mouth to protest, shivering when the tip of your tongue grazes the pad of his thumb. Satoru makes a noise in the back of his throat, something between a groan and a scoff.
You wonder if the vodka made you imagine the way his pupils dilated. “Just ask the stupid question—” You try to turn your head away in vain, and this time, Suguru laughs at your expense.
“You ever been kissed before?”
And leave you with nothing
You stiffen, gaze snapping up to meet Satoru’s, only to find him dead serious.
Ofcourse you’ve been kissed before. But not like that— not like—
Like… oh no…
And if you start to kiss—
You bring the bottle of vodka to your lips, and both boys watch with amused gazes, and hint of something you don’t have a name for yet.
“You could’ve just—” Satoru’s hand falls loose over your shoulder as you take a swig, and Suguru shifts forward in curiosity. “—said no.”
“Nobody’s kissed you?” Suguru echoes and you grimace from the alcohol and the sheer embarrassment, shoving the open bottle to stand in the space between Satoru’s legs.
“Your turn,” you grumble, wiping remnants of the sweet liquor from your mouth with the back of your palm.
And the record skips—
Satoru and Suguru exchange a look, one you immediately assume is them reading each other’s minds and gearing up to laugh in your face.
Truly, you wouldn’t blame them — because here you are about to graduate in a year and still haven’t gotten your first kiss.
And it’s not like you haven’t like… gotten close to it— it’s just that the circumstances are never perfect and other things always get involved and you get all in your head and your mind just starts to do the thing—
“Hey,” Satoru’s voice brings you out of your thoughts, and your palms go clammy, folded over your lap. “We don’t care about it, it’s nothing.” He whispers.
“Pretty sure there’s nobody who even deserves to kiss you anyway.” You glance over to Suguru, who’s already outing his cigarette and scooting closer.
Flip it over
And sit a little closer
If anything, it makes you swell with shame rather than comfort.
“Not like that, I didn’t mean—”
“Great job, Suguru—”
“As if you were doing any better—”
And despite yourself, you chuckle. They’re idiots. God, they’re fools.
Now, how many men have you kissed?
Satoru’s fingers dip under the collar of your shirt, playing around with the loose thread.
They made you laugh, that’s enough for him, always has been. He knows Suguru feels the same, but why… why doesn’t he feel satisfied with just that? Like there's something else he should be doing?
“Not fair,” he mumbles beneath his breath, cheeks flushed as he slumps forward, resting his head in the crook of your neck. You think he might be past his drinking limit, he always gets all babbly like this when he is.
“Not fair?” Suguru questions, resting a hand over his knee.
“Yeah, ‘s just not fair — who wouldn’t wanna kiss her?”
“I’m literally right here—”
“Keep listening then, it’s not like I’m lying or nothing.”
You’re not strong like Satoru and Suguru.
You’d say you’re not as beautiful either, or eve half as smart sometimes – you never compare yourselves to them but in the great grand scheme of things— you’ve never wanted to be kissed anyway, not by anyone you don’t feel for.
Not by someone who doesn’t know you in the ways you don’t want to be known.
Very few
In the way you know Satoru hates alcohol, but he only ever drinks it when you and Suguru are around. The way Suguru never likes taking pictures but manages a smile when you and Satoru pull him in for a group photo.
“If I kissed you, I’d never stop.” Suguru breathes, laying back on the bed, rumble of a sigh leaving his lips.
But you offered me a kiss
In the way they both know what you’re thinking before you even say it. The way grocery runs, 24 hour mart stops, week long missions, midnight talks, belly laughs and breaching curfew feels like a love language – something only the three of you speak – like something so foreign yet so familiar.
Why?
“I don’t think I’d remember to breathe again if I kissed you.” Satoru grumbles in the crook of your neck, somewhere between a yawn and whine. “You could have anyone you want, name, a whole line full of kisses…”
“Never really wanted to be kissed to be honest,” leaves your mouth in a whisper, your eyelids drooping shut.
Such a foolish reason, I’m afraid.
I just wanted… to kiss you.
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wrestlingwithlife · 1 year ago
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Task Force 141 Boys with Cowboy (Head canons)
Decided I’d write some head cannons for Cowboy!Reader with our main boys either that haven’t written about yet or have but are so cute I wanted to reiterate <3
Task Force 141 x Cowboy!Reader
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Soap :
#1 hype man fr 🗣️🗣️
Absolutely obsessed 😍
Will literally find any excuse to get Y/n to talk just to hear his accent
After watching Ghost get man handled by him he actually begged Y/n to spar with him
Looks up southern stuff to say to Y/n
“Y/n, will you take me to a Honkytonk? 🥺”
He tries his best but at this point he’s just doing it to get a reaction
Stumbled across the song “F***** by a Country Boy” and thought all country music was like that
Couldn’t look Y/n in the eye with hearing it in his head for a solid week
Never sleeps better then when his head is in Y/n’s lap
Literally will sleep like a rock
Soap is usually the one who falls asleep on Y/n
He didn’t realize how cuddly Y/n actually was until after one fateful night
Soap had came to watch old murder files with the southern male one night
Y/n fell asleep on Soap’s shoulder, slumbering silently
When Soap went to lean forward to grab his water he was yanked back into Y/n
Y/n bear hugged him to his chest and refused to let him go
Soap cherished that moment for the rest of forever
Added ‘Save a horse ride a cowboy’ to his Instagram bio
Has def stolen Y/n hat and tried it on
Y/n didn’t have the heart to tell him about the hat rule
But he’ll handle it eventually~
Absolute thigh guy
Has been caught staring so many times
Does not care
Continues to stare 👀
Has asked Y/n to crush him between his thighs
Y/n thought he was joking
He was not
#relatable
Ghost :
Absolutely whipped
Won’t even deny it if someone calls him out
He’s all about that Honkytonk Badonkadonk🤠
When Y/n says a word or phrase he doesn’t understand he just nods along until the male walks away, in which he will whip out his phone and immediately search it up
When Y/n mentioned there were times he missed his horses he made it his personal mission to find horses for him to pet
Ended up finding a place nearby that did horse therapy
He and Y/n both went and they absolutely loved it
The horses absolutely adored Y/n and smothered him with love
The southern male was happy to reciprocate
Ghost took a picture of it and now it’s his Lock Screen
Ghost was nervous the horses weren’t going to like him
Most animals don’t like his mask
Was elated when he realized the horses didn’t care about it
They really started to love him when Y/n showed Ghost how to feed them
Ghost was in heaven
He grew particularly fond of an old shire mare
She was all white and covered in scars but she was so impossibly gentle for her massive size
The worker said they called her Big Mama and she’d was a retired logging horse that had been rescued from going to slaughter
She adored Ghost and followed him everywhere
The workers explained she had a knack for taking the more nervous horses and animals on the ranch under her wing and making them feel a safe
Ghost almost cried when he hugged her 🥺
Now where Soap liked to sleep on Y/n, Ghost prefers to have Y/n sleep on him
Was laying in bed with Y/n one night while scrolling through his phone
Y/n was already snoozing 😴
Ghost went to put his phone on the nightstand only to get yanked back
Bro was shocked
Y/n snatched him back, burrowing under his arm
Almost cried again 🥹
Price :
Absolutely adores Y/n southern culture
Has a little notebook where he keeps stuff he learned from Y/n written down 🖊️
Occasionally uses southern slang around Y/n but unlike Soap he’s completely serious
Except the word Ain’t
He refuses to say that
When he finds out Y/n feels homesick he does everything he can to help
Gets Y/n all his favorite things
Favorite candies, books, flowers, even got Y/n a cow stuffie when he talked about missing his animals
Y/n put it next to his horse stuffie he got him last week
Price is a good cook but he doesn’t usually have the urge to do it that often
But when Y/n talked about a dish from his home town he missed??
Price spent two day’s learning how to make it and getting the stuff
Whipped that shit up like freaking master chef
The cowboy was elated and gave Price the most bone crushing hug
Snuck a little cheek kiss in there too 💋
Price’s cheeks turned pink so fast
I’m just going to say it…
Has drunk made out with Y/n before 🤯
The two got absolutely turnt on whiskey and just went for it
They never spoke about it after that but when they get close they still think about it
Price misses how the American male tastes
Something definitely awoke in him the day that he watched Y/n ride that mechanical bull
In a game of ‘Fuck, Marry, Kill’ Y/n would Marry Price a hundred times over
I mean, me too 😍
Tried southern Cajun food that Y/n made once and his heart almost stopped
It tasted good and then all of a sudden everything was on fire
Did better at holding his spice then Soap tho so 10/10
Y/n’s go to after solo missions
Y/n will stumble into his office all tired and instead of pulling up a chair just plops on the floor and leans his head on Price’s leg
Price just plays with his hair while he finishes paper work
He’d be lying if he said his mind didn’t occasionally wander with how close Y/n was to his nether regions 😜
Gaz :
Trails Y/n like a puppy 🐶
I mean this boy hangs off his every word
If Y/n ever has to run an errand off the base you best believe Gaz will be going with him
Also looks up southern slang to understand Y/n better
Also listened to “F***** by a Country Boy” and couldn’t look Y/n in the eyes for a solid week
Always offers to help Y/n when he works out
Sometimes gets distracted when he’s spotting but no one can blame the poor boy
Acts of service is def his love language ❤️
Demands to know the names of every animal Y/n owns
Made a playlist of songs that Y/n mentioned he liked
Listens to it constantly
Likes to ‘help’ Y/n cook
Really just hands him stuff that Y/n asks for
Handles the spices the best out of any of them
When it’s just the two of them going out for whatever reason he’ll just grab onto Y/n somehow
Holding a hand, the hem of a jacket or shirt, or intertwining their arms
Y/n is happy to reciprocate
People will come up to Gaz while Y/n is distracted and compliment how cute of a couple they are
Just thanks them and doesn’t deny it ever
Sleeps in Y/n’s bed more then his own
Y/n will be working at his desk and Gaz will just wander in in and plop onto his bed to sleep
If Y/n takes to long Gaz will sigh loudly till he gets the hint
Always fights Soap for Y/n’s lap on movie nights
Besides Price he’s probably got the best sense of self control
He ain’t perfect though
Is Y/n isn’t watching him he is LOCKED ON
Always locked onto those cheeks 🥵
His mind does tend to wander
Y/n could ask Gaz to fake his death and run away with him and Gaz would do it in a heartbeat
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lovverletters · 1 year ago
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Yandere! Male Lead
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Note that this is a reupload from my previous blog @hyerinrose
A/N : this took so many hours to finish Aghhh. Reblogs, notes and Feedback are appreciated!
T/W : death, yandere behaviour, etc
•┈••✦ 🎀✦••┈•💌•┈••✦ 🎀 ✦••┈•
💌 You woke up in an unfamiliar place. It wasn't the bedroom of your friend whom you had fell asleep in. The only memory you had of last night was falling asleep next to your friend's laptop while they were playing the new visual novel 'Flightless Dove'.
🎀 You couldn't have possibly experiencing those 'transmigration' thing in one of those isekai manwha/manga! Those aren't real! At least that's what you thought..
💌 Looking at the full body mirror across from the bed, you let out a sigh of relief. You still have your own features and body. However the picture frames on the bedside table reveals your identity in this new world you have been thrown into,
(Name) (Last Name), best friend of the protagonist and the heir to (Last Name) Corporation.
🎀 With this information, you recount that despite them being a side character, their story is unnecessarily tragic.
You were determined to change their fate.
Routes under the cut!
💌 Choose your route :
🍓The Fiancé 🍓
❣️Yandere! Fiancé whom you were incredibly wary of when you first met him. He was a terrible partner towards the original host, neglectful and rude towards them. Later, falling in love with Celine, the female lead and killing them to be with her.
❣️Yandere! Fiancé who you approached with caution, intending to be acquainted with him in order to hopefully guide him into becoming a normal human being. He was distant and closed off at first, shooing you off but eventually somewhat enjoys your presence.
❣️Yandere! Fiancé who finally begun opening up to you, sharing his troubles and worries with you, how angry he was at his parents for setting up this engagement without his knowledge. It's almost as if the two of you were actually lovers :)
❣️Yandere! Fiancé who falls in love with you, hard. The previous cold hearted man now replaced with a lovesick puppy who follows you around at any chance given. Always gifting you things he came across while on a business trips as a show of his affection. It's to also serve as his claim over you, that you belong to him, that you are his fiancé.
❣️Yandere! Fiancé who completely ignores the female lead numerous attempts at mingling with him. He's a faithful man, he had promised himself to you, so why should he tolerate this woman's presence any longer? Should he just kill her already? She's pissing him off greatly.
❣️Yandere! Fiancé who were envious of your friends, he wanted to be the only one you look at, the only one who you'd smile at and laugh with. Why are you giving away what's rightfully his to nobodies??
❣️"Promise me you'll never leave me, cause if you do, I wouldn't know what I'd do.."
•┈••✦ 🎀✦••┈•💌•┈••✦ 🎀 ✦••┈•
🍒The Childhood Friend🍒
❣️Yandere! Childhood Friend who's the only person you liked in the game as he's only one who stuck by the original host's side through thick and thin. Even attempting to avenge them after their death.
❣️Yandere! Childhood Friend who were surprised by your attitude towards him- not that he was against it- you were more animated and affectionate with him, it made his heart flutters everytime you complimented or gave him a hug. Have you finally reciprocate his feelings for you?
❣️Yandere! Childhood Friend who were in love with you ever since the two of you were kids. He was a loner that nobody wanted to befriend until you came along, suddenly there was a crowd of kids wanting to be friends with him. They don't matter to him though, in his eyes, you're the only friend he needed.
❣️Yandere! Childhood Friend who were incredibly jealous and resentful towards your fiancé! He was such a lucky man to be engage to you yet stupid enough to not see your worth. Can't he sees how beautiful and intelligent you are? How amazing you are compare to him??
❣️Yandere! Childhood Friend who were aware that he wasn't your only admirer. While he had been successful in scaring away your other suitors, the protagonist and even your fiancé weren't as easy. They too share the same strong feelings he have for you. And they weren't going to back down anytime soon.
❣️Though just like them, he too wouldn't be giving up on you. He was tired of seeing you with someone who's undeserving of you, who doesn't know how to treat you right.
❣️"You're the sunshine to my lonely self you know that, (Name)? I love you :)"
•┈••✦ 🎀✦••┈•💌•┈••✦ 🎀 ✦••┈•
⚘️The Protagonist⚘️
❣️Yandere! Protagonist who were the original host's best friend besides their childhood friend. He was your stereotypical main character, he was charming, attractive and powerful. Despite that, he still stuck around them until Celine came along.
❣️Yandere! Protagonist who you were determined to keep as an ally. After all the downfall of the original (Name) was because of a falling out between them and the protagonist. By having him as your friend, your chances of surviving this mad world is increased!
❣️Yandere! Protagonist who just like your childhood friend was surprised at your change of attitude towards him. He was used to your stoic and closed off self but was happy with your positive changes!
❣️Yandere! Protagonist who's feelings for you grow rapidly as days went by. He can't put a finger to what exactly it was about you that pulled him in. Was it your infectious laughter? Or your odd sense of humour that he can't help but adore you for? Your intelligence that never fails to amaze him?
❣️Yandere! Protagonist who were absolutely smitten by you that he ignores practically everyone including the female lead whom he's supposed to fall in love with. Nobody else is as important as you are to him. So why should he bother be around them when he can be with you instead? :)
❣️Yandere! Protagonist who despite his reputation as being kind and charming to others, would not hesitate to murder for you. Though he hasn't committed any, he is guilty of sending threats towards your other admirers. Unfortunately, your fiancé and childhood friend aren't as easy to rid of unlike like your other suitors.
❣️Too bad for them, he's not one to give up once he sets his eyes on something. He'll do whatever it takes if it meant that you'll be in his arms at the end of the day.
❣️"(Name), I hope you know how important you are to me. I love you now and forever"
•┈••✦ 🎀✦••┈•💌•┈••✦ 🎀 ✦••┈•
Part 2 coming soon?
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the-soliloquies-of-sadists · 11 months ago
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#388
“Hey Larry, so this is the faggot I texted you about.  He was lost a couple nights ago and came knocking on my door…. 
“Get this!  I’m watching my porn—you know the five-on-one gangbang of that Russian bitch.  She’s about 5 feet, and each of the guys are like fucking linebackers, and each with gigantic cocks.  They are smacking her around and shoving their cocks into her holes whether or not there’s already a dick in there.  At one time she had two cockheads in her mouth, one in her cunt, and one in her shitter.  The fifth guy was fucking her tits.  I love her.
“I’m going to town on my cock.  The bottle of lotion almost empty.  It’s an all night pud pounding session for sure.  Then there’s a knock at the door.  It’s eleven-thirty at night!  I pull up my shorts, that’s the only I have on. 
“I open the door and this faggot is standing there soaking wet; it had stopped raining then.  And he tells me he ran out of gas with his dead phone, and he was walking to get help.  He came across the Miller Road bridge; it was washed out.  He thought the Reed River was shallow.  Fucker got swept away.  He was walking around for hours before he found my road and me. 
“All the while he’s telling me this, he keeps staring at my hard-on tenting in my shorts.  You know that once I get a hard-on going, that it takes a long time for it to go down.  Well it was rock hard, and I didn’t care.
“So when the fag asked if I would help him, I grabbed my cock through my shorts and demanded, ‘Strip!’  I walked back to my chair and shouted, ‘Leave your wet faggy clothes on the steps and get in here and give me some head.’  The bitch did just that.  You know how hard it is for me to find a good woman who knows how to blow my fat hog.  This faggot throated me without any struggling.  He was taking me the way that Russian bitch was taking those five men in the video. 
“Just like she was getting slapped, I decided to give that a try.  Oh my god, here watch this.
“I just snap my fingers and point down, and there, just like that, the faggot comes over and kneels in front of me.
“This cocksucker can take one slap after another.  And I’m not holding back.  I’m giving him way worse than I used to hit Paula.  For her it was one slap.  I’ve already given him a dozen swats here.  But listen to what he says when I stop….
“Did you hear that?  The faggot said, ‘Thank you Sir.’  Can you believe that?  It’s grateful for me treating it like shit.  No matter what I do to him, he’s game.
“In the video after the guys nutted on her face and tits, they pissed on her.  I thought, well why not.  I pushed him off my cock.  I grabbed him by his hair and dragged him out of the trailer.  I pushed him out and he fell to the ground.  I went up to him and started pissing on his face.  And the faggot tried to catch it in his mouth!  He wanted to drink my piss.
“Watch this.  All I have to do is take out my cock and aim it at his mouth and he opens up his toilet mouth.  Oh man this is nice.  When I get done with his mouth, give him a try. 
“So, the other night, when I first pissed on him, it was a long piss, and I was pissing through a hard on.  After I was done, I kicked him.  He recoiled, but in doing so he had his ass up in the air.  It reminded me of the Russian porn star.  I had a hard on, and I just did it.  I shoved my fat cock and fucked the faggot hard.  I could tell he wasn’t ready.  It’s a good thing that the closest neighbors are half a mile away.  He was screaming like a bitch. 
“After I unloaded my balls into his shitter, threw him into Angel’s old kennel, gave him a blanket, and locked the cage.  There was no way I was going to have a stray fag in my trailer while I’m asleep. 
“You want to use his toilet mouth?  You have been telling me that I should get a good woman and have a faggot on the side to fuck.  You have that now, right?  You ever encounter a piss drinker or one you can slap around?...
“Let him suck on you afterwards.
“So yesterday morning, I took his car keys from his stuff I locked away and went looking for his car.  Found it fairly easy.  Yeah, he was telling the truth; he was out of gas.  I went through his bags.  It looks like he was driving to Chicago for that leather convention.  I brought back his suitcases, mostly full of toys.  I don’t know what the hell half of them do.  A number of dildoes.  The one that’s in his shitter right now is one with a dog tail on the other end.
“He told me he’s into something called ‘puppy play’.  I told him that he’s not fucking my dogs.  He told me he likes being treated as a dog and that being thrown into the kennel was a dream come true.  He put on this hood in the shape of a dog, and I couldn’t stop laughing.  I told him I would treat him like a dog, just without the mask.  I told him that he’ll be kept naked except for the dog tail.  I told him that I just wish that I didn’t have to look at his pecker. 
“And you know what he did?  He took out this tiny contraption.  It’s on his pecker right now.  It keeps his junk locked up so he can’t play with it or even get hard.  Look at it! There’s a padlock on it.  The faggot gave me the key!.  Never even thought of anything like this was even done. 
“Back on my dick.
“He was going to go to Chicago for the week, but he said that he would rather stay here with me and be treated like a dog.  I’m like fine.  I keep him naked, he eats his meals from a bowl on the floor, he sleeps in the kennel out back or on the dog mat beside my bed, and he’s not allowed to talk other than the thank you’s.  I put a shock collar on him like I do all my dogs, and he got so horned up.  He is one sick puppy. 
“He gives a great blowjob doesn’t he?  You were right, a faggot on the side is what men need to have to deal with bitch wives.  If I had this faggot, Paula would probably still be with me.
“Too bad, on Tuesday he’ll head on back home.  I doubt I will get to find out what all those toys were.  You know what was weird?  In his trunk, he had a toilet seat on legs.  That’s it over there.  I’m going to keep it.  You know for when we go fishing at the lake.  If we have to take a dump, instead of walking half a mile to use the one at the bait and tackle shop, or to squat in shrubs.  Now we can just sit and let go.
“Faggot, why are you grinning at me like that?  You are chuckling  Don’t you ever laugh at me.  I ought to take my belt to you.  You need to learn some manners.  You…
“…What are you trying to say?  No. No.  I told you that dogs don’t speak….  Where are you going pup?
“The toilet seat with legs?  OK.  So what?
“What the fuck?  What the hell are you doing?  Why are you crawling under…?
“…No!  Oh my fucking god.  Oh. My. God.  You want me to sit on that toilet seat with your face underneath? 
“Larry, have you ever done this?...
“…Wait, you have had a fag stick his tongue in your shitter?  I’ve seen bitches flick their tongue across a man’s ass in the pornos, but this faggot seems to want his tongue to go inside.
“Look at him.  He’s giddy.
“Larry, would you ever sit on the faggot’s face?...  You would? Ok.  I’m going to trust you on this. 
“OK faggot, you are going to be sorry….  Last chance to back out before you get smothered in my nasty crack.  I have no idea as to how clean it is, but fuck, you don’t seem to care.
“Good lord this seat is low.  How the hell…
“…Oh.  Oh.  Oh my god.  Jeeze!  Ahhhhh.  Wow.  Why the fuck did I have to wait this long to discover this?  Holy shit.  This is amazing.
“Larry.  No woman would do this…. I just can’t believe…  Damn, my dick is rock hard.  Hey, go into the trailer, or wherever, I want to take some time, enjoying this.  We’ll talk later.
“Pup, keep up doing what you are doing….  Mmmmm.  You know what?  Does this seat work the same if I turn it around.  I would prefer not to look at your body in front of me.
“Ugh!  Getting up from one of these things is a bitch.  Let’s move it to the edge of the concrete step.  There.  Now that’s at a better height.  Now I have my phone to watch some porn.  Here comes my shithole.
“Oh man.  This is the best.  You sure know how to make a man feel good.  You let me do what I want.  I said you are to go home on Tuesday.  Now, I want you to stay longer.  I want this tongue in my shithole pretty much all the time.
“That fart just slipped out….  Did you just moan? 
“Oh pup!  Let’s fucking do this….”
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sleeplessdreamer14 · 4 months ago
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Okay so imma need more twin Zuku hcs for my mental health✨
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when I say ride or die I mean you’re prepared to flee the country together if need be
two peas in a pod fr
Inko has a dozen photos of the two of you in matching Halloween costumes and stuff
all through your lives, you’ve always had Izuku’s back whether you have a quirk or not, always there for him when the world was beating him down
so when he got One For All from All Might, he saw it as his chance to return the favor
also if you do have a quirk, he’s got at least 2 whole pages dedicated to it like whether it was directly inherited from of your parents or maybe it was recessive, etc.
not to mention the twin esp it’s like your shared sixth sense
your allergies also act up at the same time
heavens forbid one of you start to cry because then the other’s gonna start crying and that’s just gonna be a mess
you may not have the exact same interests, but you share the same passionate spirits
Bakugou is… not necessarily scared of you, maybe intimidated is a more appropriate word
because you’ve been willing to square tf up with him in junior high
also you’re the only other person he allows to call him Kacchan
one time All Might called for “Young Midoriya” and you both turned your heads at the same time
it was as adorable as it sounds
when Izuku enrolled at UA but you were going to a different school, you both had to learn to cope with the separation, especially when he moved into the dorms
when you come to visit, he just casually carried you around on piggy back for a little bit because he didn’t wanna let you go (also cuz he wanted to show off a lil bit how he was now able to carry you w/out breaking a sweat)
also by the time you finally get around to meeting his classmates, it’s almost as if they’ve met you already because of how much your brother has told them about you
when Aizawa found out about you, his immediate thought was oh my god, there’s two of them.
upon realizing class 1A’s problem child had a twin, he could practically feel his first grey hair come in
my lord if one of his classmates developed a crush on you :0
his reaction heavily depends on who it is
but that’s a story for another time 😉
he makes sure to grape juice far away from you tho
one time you two fell asleep snuggled together on one of the couches in the common space while watching something on your ipad
Mina took a bunch of pics and Ochako almost cried
Kirishima admires how strong your guys’ bond is and thinks it’s super manly how you two always come through for one another
you 🤝 Iida : willing to do anything for your brothers
if you’ve got a fav pro hero, Izuku will do his best to get the opportunity for you to meet them
one of you gets seriously hurt, look out world
the league of villains is honestly kinda hesitant to target you and that’s saying something
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prodbyton · 6 months ago
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🎀's topic for today/tonight: rich bf!Anton 🫡 yes, this stems from my deep-seated desire to have a man who pays for everything i could possibly want and is obsessed with me.
rich bf!Anton for sure experienced love at first sight when he met you for the first time through a mutual friend (Sohee bc i said so). he just knew you two were meant to be. Anton shyly asked you out the second time you met. that was the first (and only) time you got a gift from a guy on the first date. when he told you he would bring you a surprise to your date, you expected flowers or a teddy bear, not earrings that cost more than you could make in a year.
after that, all hell broke loose. every single date, before you made it official, was preceded by an extravagant gift. when you agreed to be his girlfriend, he almost fell to his knees in euphoria. he started buying even more gifts. you got a gift on your anniversary every month, every couple holiday, anytime he thought you were cute which was virtually every second of every day. anytime you off-handedly mention something you want, it gets delivered to your apartment the next day. you used to feel bad before you realized how much he loved spending money on you.
Beyoncé's "Dangerously In Love" is exactly what Anton embodies. he was literally whipped by day one! his friends make fun of him for it, but they'll just never know just how much he loves it. you took note early on that he was always so happy to gift you something. he'd always grin so wide with ears so red they could pass for tomatoes. the more he spent on you the happier he was.
you remember one particular night he popped a boner while looking over his bank statements. you were in his lap and pointing out which thousand-dollar purchases were yours (a monthly ritual since you started dating). you thought sitting on his lap was doing it for him, but the farther you got down the list, the tighter he held you to his lap. the two of you never finished the list because he dragged you over to the bed. that night he went down on you like it was his last meal and fucked you as his life depended on it. you never confronted him about poorly disguised kink, you just made sure to use his card a bit more than usual.
-🎀 (the way i just casually (and accidentally) write whole essays about these mfs is crazy and should studied)
i woke up last night at 3am, read this and giggled until i fell back asleep and wow… just wow u really eat these up every time 🤭
lowkey wanna make this into a fic fr so i wont share my thoughts and ill just leave this here… like findom except you don’t even realize whats going on until you see how turned he is while you whine about how he spends so much on you and that there was no reason for him to give you his card… he tells you that you that you don’t even have to work anymore cuz he’ll take care of everything 😵‍💫
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wcnderlnds · 30 days ago
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alone together | jimmy darling
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・❥・ summary: jimmy saves you from twisty and you end up catching feelings for him. ・❥・word count: 2.3k ・❥・warnings: 18+, nsfw. female reader, virgin!reader, p in v, unprotected sex, maybe some swearing, clown mentions. ・❥・ authors note: im still not super confident writing smut so we all gotta keep pretending its decent until i am thank u love u.
The damp smell of mould filled your nostrils, eyes straining to see through the bars you were held behind. It had been days since you’d eaten more than half a cracker, your stomach hurting from the lack of food and water. How much longer could you survive this? Escaping wasn’t an option. You and your fellow captives had tried but each time it had failed. All you could do was sit and suffer through each and every day of this torture. 
The door to the small trailer was thrown open and in stepped the clown. His terrifying face looming through the bars at you, holding out… flowers? Shaky hands took them from him but when you didn’t smile or thank him he started rattling the cage, moans of anger coming from the mask on his face. He threw open the cage door, grabbing your wrist roughly and dragging you outside where there was another clown. It took no time at all for them to tie you up, the other one more talkative — his voice seemed familiar to you but you couldn’t quite place it.
The talkative of the two skipped over to you. The weapon in his hand brought up to your throat…
You jumped up in bed, sweating buckets, fear coursing through you as you once again dreamt of that night. As your eyes focused, you noticed another person in the room. He was looking at you with concerned eyes, slowly edging closer to you. Scooting back on the bed was all you could do to put some distance between you and the mystery man.
“Hey, calm down, toots. I’m not gonna hurt you. It’s me, Jimmy,” his soothing voice said calmly. His hands up in the air. That’s when you realised who it was. The man that had saved you. 
“Sorry,” you mumbled.
“Now what’re you apologising for? You went through a real traumatic experience, doll face. I'd be concerned if you weren’t a little cautious.” His voice was like a soothing balm, easing a little bit of the fear.
“I appreciate it. You rescuing me and letting me crash here. I don’t got nowhere else to go.”
“You can stay here as long as you like. I’m sure we can bother Elsa to give you a job around here to help out — make you a part of the family. Besides, here, you’ll be safe. I’ll make sure of it.”
For some reason, you believed him with all your heart and soul.
Elsa had given you a job. It wasn’t anything special — just to clean up around the place and help the others get ready for their acts. It was easy work but it made you feel important. Everyone had accepted you the instant Jimmy introduced you to them. It had taken a while for you to open up and actually hold a conversation but they had been so patient with you. They knew the whole story of what you’d been through. It was probably why they were just as protective of you as Jimmy was. Well, no. Nobody was as protective of you as Jimmy. He had stuck to his word and made sure you were safe. Anyone even so much as looked at you funny and he was by your side ready to defend you. The fact you had someone looking after you made you feel special. Jimmy made you feel special. The closer the two of you got, the easier it was to fall for him.
Whether it was his charming smile or his caring nature, he always found a way to make you swoon. Not that he knew. No, there was no way you were telling him. The thought alone was almost more terrifying than being kidnapped by that awful clown.
The nightmares still came but they weren’t as frequent anymore. They never came on the nights where you fell asleep on Jimmy, held tightly in his arms. Those were your favourite nights. It often happened when you were talking — he was a touchy guy and always liked to have his arm around you. Who were you to refuse a cuddle from a handsome guy like that? It was purely platonic even if your herat beat a little faster any time he touched you.
“You busy after the show tonight?” Jimmy asked, approaching you with his hands in his pockets and a grin on his face.
At his question, you stopped sweeping the floor, turning to look at him. “No, why?”
“Thought I’d treat you. Meet me at my trailer after the show?”
“Yeah, okay.”
It felt like the night dragged, each acting seeming to take twice as long as normal when in reality you were just being impatient. Ever since Jimmy had asked you to meet him after the show, it was all you could think about. Maybe there was some hope that he did actually feel the same way you did. The thought alone was enough to make you feel giddy. It didn’t help when Jimmy caught the wide smile on your face from the other side of the stage and threw a wink your way. 
When the show finally came to it’s end, you almost ran to his trailer - but didn’t because you didn’t want to seem too eager. When you stepped inside, Jimmy was already there. Turns out he was just as eager as you were. He gestured for you to take a seat and you almost couldn’t believe your eyes. This man had cooked you dinner. He’d taken the time to actually cook for you. That meant the world to you, especially knowing Jimmy wasn’t that much of a cook in the first place.
Was there anything more romantic than the person you liked making you dinner? He’d even set the small table out with a candle in the middle.
The two of you chatted, laughed and ate. It was like nothing else in the world mattered but you two. It had been so long since you felt so carefree. With that thought in mind, you decided to be brave. You had to take your shot while you had it, right? So, you leaned in and captured Jimmy’s lips with yours. At first he was surprised, his eyes wide but soon enough he relaxed into it, his lips moving gently against yours.
It felt like heaven kissing him. It was everything you’d dreamed of and more. He nibbled your bottom lip trying to deepen the kiss so you parted your lips, your tongues tangling together in a frenzied dance. Jimmy’s hand rested on your hip, gently laying you back on the bed where you’d moved over to relax after dinner, his body gently resting on top of yours. The second you felt his hand slide up your thigh and under your dress, you froze. That caused Jimmy to instantly stop, pulling away with a confused look on his face. 
“I thought….” He furrowed his brows.
“No, I mean…” Before you could finish your sentence, he cut you off.
“It’s because of these right, right? You don’t want these hands touching you. I should have guessed it was too good to be true. I thought you were different than everyone else but turns out you’re just the same as them,” Jimmy’s eyes were ablaze with anger. He had a short fuse, you knew this so you tried to diffuse the situation quickly. As he tried to get to his feet, your fingers gently encircled around his arm not letting him move.
“It’s not that. I don’t care about any of that. Your hands are part of you and… I like every part of you. I just…” you swallowed, almost mumbling your next words. “I’m… a virgin.”
That took him by surprise. His features softened immediately. It had nothing to do with him. You liked him. All of him. “We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. But, I gotta tell you doll, I really like you. You drive me crazy.”
“I… want to. I’m just nervous.”
“We’ll go slow, alright? I do something you don’t like then you tell me to stop and I will, I promise.”
You nodded your head, hands threading through his hair as you pulled him back down to your lips. This time when his hand slid up your thigh, you didn’t stop him. His fingers softly rubbing you through your panties causing a moan to slide from your lips. The noise sent shivers down his spine. If he could hear you make noises like that for the rest of his life then he’d be a happy man. 
“Can I?” He asked as his fingers found the edge of your panties. With a nod, you gave him permission. Jimmy wasted no time at all in pulling them off, bunching your dress up around your waist so he could get a better view. He groaned at the sight, his cock already half hard and straining against his pants.
His fingers slid through your folds with ease, the skin on skin contact causing you to moan out, your hand grasping his wrist as he softly moved his fingers. You’d touched yourself before but it had never felt as good as this. His eyes kept focused on you, taking note of what made you moan, what made you squirm. Sensing how wet you were, he decided to push the boundaries a bit more, his fingers rubbing against your entrance. He pushed them inside slowly. You gasped out. He slowly began to slide his finger in and out, trying not to hurt you. With his conjoined fingers, he knew he had to be careful. The last thing he wanted to do was cause you any harm. Your soft moans echoed through the trailer, your orgasm fast approaching.
“Ohhh, Jimmy,” you whined, back arching off the mattress as you bucked your hips into his hand. That familiar feeling was pooling in the pit of your stomach and all it took was his thumb circling your clit for you to fall apart around his fingers.
He continued pumping his finger into you through your release only pulling out once he was sure you were finished. The smirk on his face as he leaned down to capture your lips once again was captivating. In your still dazed state you barely felt the way he was moving his hips against you, his hard, clothed length rubbing against you. “Jimmy?”
“Hmmm?” He mumbled, his lips now pressing along your neck.
“I want you.”
His head shot up, eyes searching yours to make sure you were certain. When he found no hesitation he didn’t waste any time in pulling your dress off you along with his own clothes. As he laid back on top of you, skin on skin, you felt the nerves bubble up. Sensing it, he rested his forehead against yours. “We don’t have to do this.”
“I want to. I trust you. You once told me you’d keep me safe and… I know you will now too.”
“Well, shit, way to make me feel like the luckiest guy on the planet.” His lips found yours in a soft gentle kiss saying more than words ever could. His free hand rested on your hip as he positioned himself at your entrance. “You sure? I’ll go real slow. Tell me to stop at any point, okay?”
“I trust you,” you whispered.
That was all he needed. Slowly, he pressed his tip into you, pushing in until he heard you gasp. The sharp ache that ran through your body hurt like hell, your eyes scrunched up. Jimmy looked at you with concern, his hand finding yours letting you squeeze it if you needed to. “You okay?”
You nodded your head. Once he was certain you really were fine he pushed in a little more. You squeezed his hand, breathing out to ground yourself. He stilled once he was almost all the way inside giving you time to adjust to him, peppering kisses all over your face to ease you. “Y-you can move, Jimmy.”
He pulled out slowly, shallowly then back in testing the waters. It still hurt but you weren’t going to let that stop you. His pace was slow, the tightness of your walls almost overwhelming him. The more he moved against you, the more enjoyable it became and slowly but surely the wince of pain turned into soft moans. It was like music to Jimmy’s ears. He picked up the pace just a little bit more, a groan slipping past his lips when you moved your own hips with his.
“You feel so good, dollface,” he whispered in your ear, his lips finding that sweet spot on your neck, gently biting down. “Can’t believe you’re letting me do this of all people.”
Your hands rested on his back, your body moving with each thrust. As your release grew closer, Jimmy felt your nails digging into his back. He let out a hiss, the feeling only bringing his own release closer. 
“Jimmy!” You gasped as he sped up, his hand moving to bring one of your legs to hook around his waist. His thrusts were becoming sloppy now, his own high on the horizon. Your body arched into his, walls clenching around him as you came, his name falling like a prayer from your lips.
“That’s it, baby, I’ve got you,” he grunted. The feeling of your body convulsing around him was enough to send him over the edge, burying himself inside you as he coated your walls with his release.
His body collapsed on top of you, the both of you sweaty and spent. All that echoed through the room were your heavy breaths as you tried to calm down. Jimmy’s head was buried in the crook of your neck, peppering light kisses there as your hand ran through his dark messy hair. Eventually, he lifted his head up to look at you with a lazy smile. “I meant it, y’know? When I said I was crazy about you. Have been since I met you. My life isn’t the greatest but you’re a sliver of hope in all the darkness. When I’m with you I feel…normal.”
“I’m all yours for as long as you’ll have me, Jimmy Darling.”
“Alright, how’s forever then?”
tag list (ask to be added!): @juliamaximoff @lemoniiiiiii @jazz-berry @xmidnight-rain @honeymoon8
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