#I feel like they try to have it both ways re girl's ignorance

[bethanydelleman]

I'm watching a Chinese drama called Blossom right now and it's doing historical arranged marriage in such an interesting way and it's making me think more about my post about arranged marriage and particularly, what models of marriage has the female character seen growing up?

Because maybe part of why the Sad/Angry at arranged marriage princess/noble woman feels so hollow is because the mother is usually placidly sitting beside her husband pushing for marriage too. If your parents have a fine arranged marriage, what are you so worried about? It can come off more as a petulant kid than a real denunciation if we don't have indication that they really know what they're mad about or afraid of (Eloise Bridgerton...) Especially when they keep emphasizing how the girls are sheltered and ignorant, where did she manage to get this disillusioned?

This drama has so far shown three failed marriages, all unique. One marriage broke down because the husband was sexually assaulting female servants, another because after emotionally supporting her failure of a husband for 10 years, he took a second wife right after getting his dream job (that one felt so real), and the last woman accepted her marriage wouldn't have affection but was appalled when her husband cheated on her with her half-sister as it violated her sense of marital decency and respect.

What I really like the most is the characters mostly buy into, and all of them expect, marriage to be explicitly political. The whole mindset feels a lot more genuine to the time period. No one is Shocked Pikachu Face that they'll be asked to marry someone for family alliance reasons. And the anti-marriage female lead, she earned that opinion. She knows. She's haunted.

[kisses4reid]

scare | ·˚ ༘ spencer reid ,, (part 1)

synopsis - you’re in a relationship with some one else and have a pregnancy scare, both your own reaction and spencer’s makes you realise that you’re not happy.

genre - bau!reader x spencer, friends to lovers, multi-part, pregnancy scare, reader has sort of a douche bf, one sided love (at first), angst and fluff

warnings - pregnancy talk, mentions of sex, unhealthy relationships, stress, sickness

w/c - 1.4k?? take a guess cause that’s mine.

a/n - i’ve got 9 weeks free. yeah, i have a job. and yeah, i have about 6 other hobbies i enjoy. but am i gonna make promises i can’t keep about writing more?? yeah. i am. here, enjoy. (pls lemme know abt mistakes it’s rlly late at night rn.)

The plane whirrs, small chatter from Morgan and who you assumed to be Penelope over the phone humming along with the music you try to distract yourself with. It isn’t working.

Because every song has its own special and quirky musical instrument that happens to sound like a message notification. And you keep getting your hopes up.

Your left leg started to bounce, your fingernails found their way to your anxious teeth. And Spencer noticed.

He noticed about halfway through the case, when you stopped talking as much, started drinking an influx of water, started discreetly taking pain medication. At first, he thought it was a simple stomach bug, and he knew your stomach didn’t agree with a lot of travel. But then you started getting nervous.

Spencer glanced at you a few times before moving, sitting next to you (attempting to be discreet). He can’t be discreet though, because every time he’s around you, his body does this weird thing where it can’t decide whether it should be instantly calm or instantly more nervous. Your presence stopped his fidgeting hands, his tired thoughts. But god, when he looked at you, it’s like his heart wants to see you for itself.

And right now his heart hurt, why were you scared?

You barely noticed Spencer sit down, usually you would, but your phone was annoyingly blank, silent. You turned it off and on three times, and re-entered the plane’s wifi password five times.

And now your stomach was grumbling, and not in the way that those nice small sandwiches can help out with.

“Are you okay?”

You jumped, taking your earphones out and staring at Spencer surprised. You laughed nervously, quietly, “Spencer! Sorry. Yeah, I’m fine.”

His warm eyes searched yours and for a second you could ignore the tight feeling in your chest. It made you think back around 8 months ago, when Penelope, your childhood best friend and now co-worker, created a pros and cons list for both Lloyd, and… Spencer.

It was unprofessional and inappropriate, especially when you decided to listen because you had nothing better to do. And especially when she started making some good points.

He squinted his eyes, and you sighed.

“Sorry, I’m just a bit antsy. Feeling a bit… off.”

You felt sick, and stressed, and like your thoughts were going to be the cause of your death. Because you’ve never been sick like this. And to your overworked brain, it only meant one thing.

Spencer’s a great profiler. And although the team collectively agreed to not profile each other, it becomes hard for Spencer when the girl he’s in love with is so obviously in distress. Even worse when he can’t be the hero.

“I can leave you to sleep if you want.” He says, getting up to leave.

“Oh, no. That’s okay. Honestly, I think sleeping would just make it worse.”

Ah, right. Travel sickness, Spencer thought. He gaps his mouth slightly and nods. He relaxes into the couch and looks over to you, heart picking up slightly as pieces of hair fell from your loose ponytail.

You looked over to the table he was previously sat at, the book you gifted him last Christmas open and nearly finished. You smiled to yourself, but it was bittersweet.

“You’re actually reading it?” You asked, looking back at him with slight surprise.

“Of course. I’ve read it 6 times already, it’s a great pallet cleanser- Just like you said in that Christmas card!” He smiled childishly, like he was recalling the first snow.

“I know right! It’s so simple but interesting, I mean I’ve only read it three times but to me I always found it to clear my head.”

Spencer angled himself towards you, “Did you know that the author actually interviewed his daughter’s teachers to see what ages teachers were more invested in compared to class sizes? He said in an interview that depending on a students intelligence, there’s an underlying emotional connection made between student and teacher,” he took a breath, “It plays into the intelligence to ego ratio that so many people claim isn’t true. Which I’m not trying to say you have a big ego, or that I do-“

You waved you hands, “Woah, woah. Why would I think you’re talking about me?”

He furrowed his eyebrows, “Well, you’re very intelligent.”

“Oh!… Thanks for thinking I’m intelligent, or smart.” You shrugged, “But I think you insulted yourself. You don’t have a 187 IQ for nothing do you?”

“You remembered my IQ?” He laughed nervously. His smile warms your chest like a candle. Like that candle he got you randomly in April, after you mentioned your favourite one being used up by your boyfriend.

Your boyfriend. Ugh.

You smile falters for only a second, “Of course. You only mention it to every person that second guesses you.”

He nods and smiles, “Must be my ego.”

You laugh, subconsciously bumping your shoulder with his. But- Jesus. Your stomach is queasy.

“Hey, uh, do you want some travel sickness pills?” He reached over for his satchel but you grab his forearm and smile as convincingly as you can.

“No, no. We’re landing soon, but thank you.”

You’re overreacting.

That’s what he said. When you texted your boyfriend of a year and a half that you thought you were pregnant he said, You’re overreacting. Two words, two hours after your first text, on his day off.

Maybe you are. You started feeling sick on a slightly more gory case, it’s lasted ever since the case started, you get travel sick as well.

The headaches are from the computer screen and stress. The stress is from fatigue. The fatigue is because of the lack of sleep. The lack of sleep is because of the headaches.

Why do you always do this? Always thinking that there’s something wrong with you. Always being the biggest person in your own life, selfish.

But… what if?

There’s a sudden squeak from behind you, and you instantly snapped out of it. You took a deep breath and looked at your surroundings. You were at your desk, standing, the strap of your bag clutched in your hands - god, your knuckles were white. Your eyes darted in surprise and confusion, and you jumped once again when Spencer spoke into the silence.

“You okay?”

“Um…”

You didn’t look back at him, only looking down at your shoes and taking a deep breath. You plastered on a smile despite the bile collecting in your throat.

“Yeah! Yeah, I’m fine. I’ve gonna go, the bus leaves at um…”

You took out your phone. He didn’t even respond to your text asking him to pick you up.

“I’ll drive you home. But uh, I gotta pick up some groceries. I hope you don’t mind.”

He curved to your desk and gently took your bag from your hands, glancing at the way you traced your knuckles and how the leather strap now had slight wrinkles in it. He smiled, warmly. And he started walking like you rejecting the idea wasn’t an option.

Which is wasn’t, because he knew you too well.

“Well, a cucumber actually has 3% more water than watermelon. So if you really want a refreshing snack, cucumber is your man.”

You smiled and raised your eyebrows in interest. He’s had many vegetables and fruits in the basket, not a lot of protein. Explained a lot.

My man, you thought with a smile.

My man, you shivered.

“I don’t like cucumbers.” You said like it was distraction, and he nodded, picking up some kewpie mayo as he you around to the next aisle. He glanced at you,

“I know. You say it’s tasteless. I like it.” He shrugged.

“I know.” You smiled, and he smiles back.

God, you wish you could bask in it, the warmth. But your chest was still tingly, and your heart hadn’t stopped aching ever since you got excited about an email notification.

“Hey, are you sure you’re okay? I noticed you’ve been tense for like… a week.” He grabbed some pasta sauce and put his hand on your shoulder to turn you around - you obviously looked too far into your own head.

“Yeah, just feeling-“

“Y/n.” He turned to you, stopping your venture into the dairy aisle. His eyes were hard, worried. The fluorescent lights swayed slightly. A worker walked by the end of the aisle with a trolley full of food.

“Sorry.”

“Don’t,” he lifted one arm, wanting to rest his hand on your upper arm, to help you, “Don’t say sorry. Just tell me what’s going on.”

“I have been feeling sick. That’s true. And I’ve been stressed and, thinking a lot. A lot.”

It felt weird to nearly tell Spencer about your relationship problems. It was like complaining to a doctor about healing crystals. It was like a slap in the face. Maybe that’s why you never did tell him about it, because it was facing your fears.

It was the pros and cons list made by Penelope.

But I’m overreacting.

“It’s nothing.”

Spencer sighed. You had that habit, of nearly opening up, and then shutting the door just as he was about to walk in.

You heard his sigh.

“Okay. I gave Lloyd my car because he has the day off, and he likes going to his friends houses on his days off. And, I told him something that should probably freak him out. But he doesn’t really care. I don’t think he really cares, about anything. At least about me.”

You started walking, because holy shit you’ve never said that out loud before, and Spencer followed you,

“Y/n, if you want to tell me something-“

“I think I’m pregnant.” You stopped, and started picking at your fingers, acting as if it was admitting to not knowing your left and rights, or that you don’t really like coconut.

His eyes widen, and his heart drops. It was like his worst nightmare coming true- jesus, how could he even think about himself right now? The girl he loved felt trapped with a man she thought might be the father of her baby.

Spencer gulped, “Oh.”

“Yeah, oh.”

You looked at each other, scared, you more than him. And then you cringed,

“God, I’m sorry Spencer. I shouldn’t have said anything-“

“No- Y/n, it’s fine. I’m glad you told me-“

“I haven’t even, like, taken a test yet-“

“Wait so-”

You spun on your heel and looked at him exasperated.

“So… let’s go get some tests.” He said (he hopes) calmly. He was really trying, to pretend to be calm and collected. That’s what you needed, a clear head to replace yours.

He paid for everything, even the 5 pregnancy tests and the over sized lollipop you put in the basket to ease your nerves later on.

The moon was high, you were about three hours late to get home now, and your head was attacking itself with rambles and aches and honestly, you were sick of it.

You shivered, huddling in your jacket and drawing only slightly closer to Spencer. His silence was like a hook, drawing you in closer and higher and taking every word you had been thinking that day to the tip of your tongue.

You looked up to him. His hair fell into his eyes, the breeze reddening his cheeks slightly.

It’s Spencer. You’ve known him for nearly 6 years, but it feels like you’ve known each other for ever. You know everything about him, and he knows everything about you. Well, not everything. He doesn’t know how you feel in your own apartment, how every anniversary had been forgotten even when it was the ‘1 year’ mark, how you felt like you were raising an over grown child who could drink.

He knows you’re strong, but admitting all that? I’d look weak.

You have looked weak in front of Spencer. He stayed overnight in your hospital room, he held you when you watched a little girl die, he wiped your tears when you watched a sad short film during your break.

You couldn’t hide anything from him.

“I don’t think I’m pregnant- Well, I mean I might be, but there’s a very low chance,” You started, Spencer’s jaw clenched for a millisecond, “I’ve just been feeling sick and… it could be because of stress from work, or just general stress- like, I don’t know.”

Spencer moved the grocery bag to his other hand.

“Kids are great, don’t get me wrong. Some people don’t get the chance to have kids. I mean…” You gulped, and Spencer finally looked down at you. But now, all you could do was stare at the car park’s concrete floor. Speaking out loud was like clearing your brain, the fog was lifting. “Lloyd doesn’t want kids. I do, at least in the future, not right now. I just hope it’s not with-“ You cut yourself off, and slow down a bit. Spencer matches your pace.

I just hope it’s not with him.

He gulps, and clears his throat, looking down at you with understanding eyes, “With everything that’s going on.”

“Yeah… yeah. You know, my job, my…” It’s no use lying to Spencer. He knows. He’s known, for a long time.

Your chest was tight, and you made eye contact with the pregnancy tests lying on top of Spencer’s groceries. The thought of going home, rushing to the bathroom, avoiding your boyfriend who was already waiting angry, made your throat close up. Because only now, when you were three hours late from work and ignoring his one attempt at a phone call, Lloyd texted, ‘I think you need to calm down.’ It was a bare minimum, and finally Spencer could see you realizing it.

No, ‘Wre you okay?’, ‘What’s making you think this?’ ‘Where are you?’

No. He was making you out to be the crazy one, the one to be over thinking, over bearing, too much.

You were confused. To put it blankly. And scared. And questioning your life decisions. And honestly you just wanted to curl up in a ball and to have Spencer make you bad cucumber salad at his warm apartment.

You looked up to Spencer but he was already looking down at you, reaching for his keys and nodding, “You can come to mine, it’ll be okay.”

taglist (open) - @jeffswh0re @reap3erslov3 @candyd1es @0108s22m @aurorsworld @theoraekenslover @c-losur3 @littlelearningbrat @khxna @laurakirsten0502 @cultish-corner

[ma1dita]

can i get one ticket for here for the boos!! starring luke castellan with a pretzel! and maybe a lil spice on that pretzel :O also, i love your fics so much i always re-read them because of how good they are <333

devil inside

[STARRING: LUKE CASTELLAN x reader ; “Don’t. Move.”]  wc: 1k  warnings: written with aphrodite reader in mind, but not officially stated; anon asked for lil spice so this came out veeeerrryyy suggestive? MDNI for non-descriptive fondling/fingering. yandere!luke. i say the word cum once—do what y’all will with that. implied minor character death, mentions of blood, alcohol, manipulation; title from inxs song, i’m tryna keep the titles spooky hehe. oh and i hit 2k followers while writing this last night! thank you thank youuu

monster mash-terlist

꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷

Luke Castellan has always been your protector and best friend. 

A two-in-one deal that you couldn’t help but thank the gods for every time you throw your offerings into the hearth at mealtimes. He always has your best interest in mind, is always devoted to taking care of you, and puts you first over anyone—so who else would you depend on to walk you home from a beach party?

Bad things happen around here at Camp Half-Blood, especially after dark, if we’re being honest. It would only be sufficient to have camp’s best hero be your escort back to your cabin. You’re giggling like a fool as Luke half-carries you through the dirt pathway toward home, purple slippers tucked in his back pocket and his thumb grazing the sliver of skin that peeks out above your daisy dukes. 

It would be wrong of him to leave you like this. Truly, what type of best friend would he be if he did? He knows you have admirers—you’re beautiful, for one. And it’s in your nature to be desired by all, though he supposes even without your blood being mixed with ichor that everyone would still look at you the way they do. And it angers him more than it should, a slow bubbling in his stomach that boils through to the surface whenever anyone leers at you or ogles your form as something they hope to have, or worse—conquer. Vincent from Cabin 4 was bold enough to try, growing flowers at will and weaving them into your hair, touching you and decorating you—making it known to the others that he got close enough to something sacred. By the time Luke got to the party tonight, the son of Demeter had a smile that would make anyone think he’d won the lotto.

Well, Vincent won’t make that mistake again. Luke made sure of it.

Tonight alone was evidence enough that no one takes what belongs to him. But Luke has more pressing problems at hand as he leads you further away from the crowd, like how you keep pressing your soft hands into the growing bulge of his cargo shorts, a sly grin illuminating your face and a simple, “Oopsie!” each time you do it. The both of you know what you’re blatantly hinting at after the third pass, and he’d be an idiot to ignore the way your arms wrap around his neck, knees buckling as you beg him to divert your journey towards the lake—whichever way that may be; you’re drunk off cheap vodka and he’s drunk off the smell of sweat and salt on your skin.

You feel like you’re flying, squealing like Luke’s tickling you as he carries you in his arms. There’s something in him that loves the way you pretend to resist, like how prey fall limp in a predator’s hold just in case they might lose interest—but how could he? You’re mouthing at his collarbone, tongue tracing out the letters of your name and your body pliant under his grasp. His skin is impermanently marked where no one can see, yet he’s yours either way, especially when you tease him like this, cooing,  “Luke, come onnnn….”

“Shhh…silly girl, they’ll hear you.”

The boy is grinning and has his hands wrapped under your armpits; in your drunken haze, you think it might be the wind or his long fingers caressing the underwire of your bra as he sets you down against him, back to his chest and legs dipping in the warm waters of Canoe Lake. You lean into him nonetheless, pulling your best friend in with a cute pout until he’s putty in your hands. He’d do anything for you. And right now, you’re hyperaware of that.

“Stop…don’t move,” he breathes, eyes fluttering as you wiggle against his lap and wrap his arms tighter around you, engulfing your frame from any stragglers that might be heading back from the bonfire. But Luke made sure you’d be alone tonight, your cheek against his as you both observe how the moon reflects the water. Your face is warm against his and he feels the imprint of your smile taking form by how it feels against his jaw, “M’just playing Lu. You know that, right?”

Clenching his jaw he smiles stiffly at you, and he silently thanks the gods you’re too drunk to notice his disappointment. He knows you love this—reveling in any attention you give him, drunk kisses in the moonlight and wandering hands doing very unfriendly things that he wishes you’d actually want to talk to him about in the morning. But when you’re not with him, your attention is elsewhere—preening over being treated like the ultimate prize. He was just easy access for you. And you still won’t think it means anything.

So as a typical son of Hermes, he takes matters into his own hands, literally taking you, even if you’re not his. It’s all the same to him, really, and you’re the one pushing his palms into the cotton cups of your bra. You’re using him because he’s there, and whatever this is will have to do for now.

“Gotta stay quiet f’me…stay still, okay?”

Luke unzips your shorts, tracing slow circles into your sodden underwear as you bite down on your bottom lip and look at him all needy. It almost looks like desire, but he wants you to mean it. He needs to make sure you’re devoted to him too—not just when you spread your legs and moan his name into the quiet of the night.

Being desired might be your domain, but deception is his. By morning, they’ll find Vincent's body floating in the very lake that your legs are writhing in. While you’re busy with the feeling of his fingers delving in and out of your warmth, he plans on how to get you to cum hard enough so that your eyes stay closed and ignore the smaller details, like the smell of blood on the rocks, and the Demeter boy’s flowers he’s been plucking out of your hair since you started your rendezvous—drifting back towards the still-warm body of their owner.

You’ll see how much you mean to him. He’s made sure of it.

꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷

ma1dita's monster mash is open for requests until 10/12 :)

[wileys-russo]

leah williamson, “dont give me that look, i don’t like that look” changing room with arsenal!reader please🥹🫶🏻

l.williamson II the look

"alright girls! relay time." david the step in trainer for the afternoon yelled out with a grin, the rest of the staff pairing you all off to make two teams.

"as a team you will hold hands as you go through the course girls, if someone lets go or falls over you go back to the start. once you reach the blue poles you will break apart and take turns one by one sprinting to the end and back going around the pole at the end. each team will get a baton to be passed onto the next girl, you drop it on the handover then you run again, repeating until your entire team is back." david explained, everyone nodding their understanding and you chuckled watching leah shush a few of the younger ones with a stern look, clearly taking this as seriously as she could.

"ready on three!" david called, both lines of women crouching and ready as your girlfriend smirked across from you, the pair of you on opposite teams and knowing how fiercely competitive leah was, the results of this would be interesting.

"two, one...go!" you both took off, stood at the front and leading your teams around the obstacle course set up by the trainers, giggles filling the air as everyone tripped and stumbled, doing their best not to take the team down and cause a restart, but the series of very different heights and speeds made this anything but easy.

you did your very best to lead your team through though you knew leah bested you at that as you couldn't stop laughing and she couldn't stop shouting like a drill sergeant.

"go lots!" you all hurried to detatch as you arrived to the blue poles, leahs team just having a lead as lotte and stina raced off together for the first lap.

"yes foxy!" you clapped as the girl grabbed the baton, sprinting off and giving your team a tiny gap as beth fumbled the baton and needed to return to the start, shooting your girlfriend a smirk who groaned.

"beth come on man butter fingers honestly!" leah moaned as the blonde finally passed the baton over successfully and re-joined the group.

"oh its for fun leah, lighten up for god sakes you're such a stick in the mud!" beth rolled her eyes pushing the blonde shoulder, ignoring leahs 'constructive feedback' as she was now clearly the only one taking it seriously, everyone elses jeering and laughs of delight filling the air.

"yeah baby, lighten up." you teased as she heard but ignored you, kyra tagging alessia who bless her heart tripped over her own feet earning leahs team their lead back as alessia stumbled off to try and make up time.

"its fine less just brush it off!" you yelled after her, all of you clapping and supporting as once again leah was instead yelling at her team to hurry, kim next up who sprinted off as alessia smacked the baton into katies hand.

"good job twinkle toes." you grinned to the taller blonde who groaned and playfully punched you, collapsing to the ground beside lotte. you continued to all yell and cheer for your team as leah continued to try and motivate hers through different ways.

"this is like when we did the pacer test at school. horrendous!" alessia sighed, chugging a bottle of water with a shake of her head, the day unnaturally hot and you were all feeling it.

the lead was never more than a few seconds, bouncing from leahs teams to yours as both of you purposefully hung back so you could race one another. you may have had different approaches to it but there was no denying you were both determined to beat the other.

the final duo before the two of you finished it up were the aussies, steph for leahs team and caitlin for yours as both you and leah were screaming encouragement, the training staff watching on in amusement as the rest of the girls sat down with their waters.

caitlin just had a head on steph and slipping the baton into your hand you took off getting a good start over your girlfriend who you heard curse angrily behind you as she grabbed the baton and sprinted to try and catch up.

so much so that she didn't go around the pole at the end rather just touching it with her hand while you did it properly which lost you your lead, your whole team protesting heavily as leah crossed the line just before you, dropping her baton and pumping her fists as her team started to celebrate.

"nah thats bullshit she cheated!" you puffed, hands on your knees as you caught your breath and your team backed the accusation. "nah you're all just sore losers mate!" leah beamed, arms slung around lia and kim.

"rules were around the pole, leah only touched so her team is disqualified. winners!" david declared pointing to your team who all cheered, jumping on top of one another as leahs team exploded in protest, david waving it off as he and the rest of the staff began to walk off the pitch.

"you're all just sore losers." you mocked your girlfriends earlier words as the group split up and started to head back inside the training centre for lunch. you tried to hug leah who huffed and side stepped you, storming off inside as you watched her go with a laugh.

"doghouse for you mate." katie barked and pulled you into a headlock, dragging you with her back inside and to the change rooms, chants of victory filling the room as your team reveled in their win.

"hello loser." you appeared in front of leah with a grin, the blonde ignoring you making you shake your head and knock her legs apart, standing closer to her.

"don't give me that look, i don't like that look." leah mumbled catching the somewhat stern way you stared down at her. "because you're being a child." you bumped your knee against hers. "you cheated so you lost, karma." you reminded as your girlfriend mumbled something inaudible.

"you know if the shoe was on the other foot you'd be mugging me off left right and centre lee." you reminded, arms wrapping around her neck as you moved even closer as she huffed and looked up at you with a frown.

"don't pout baby, you should have played fair and you'd not paid the price." you laughed but bent down to kiss at her puckered bottom lip anyway, earning the two of you a wolf whistle.

"fuck off cooney-cross." leah warned leaning around you to shoot the younger girl a glare as she paled and near sprinted out of the room. "leah!" you laughed pushing at her shoulder as she shrugged and looked back up at you, tapping her lips expectantly.

"my girl i fear its gonna take a lot more kisses to make the pain of this loss go away." leah sighed dramatically, her head resting on your stomach as she was sitting down while you stood, rolling your eyes and pushing her fringe out of her face.

"well its a good thing we have the rest of our lives to make up and make out then my love."

[bsturnzmtts]

Reminder - Chris Sturniolo

Re uploaded because my account bsturnzmtt got deactivated :( Please follow and let me know if you want to be in my tag list !

Paring: jealous mean! Chris x sub! Reader

Contains/warnings: situationship, orgasm control, edging, overstimulation, creampie (on the pill), spanking, degradation, really rough sex (if you dont like dont read!), riding, petnames

Summary: Chris flirts and fucks other girls, since you guys aren't in a relationship you can't really say something to him. So you decide to flirt with a guy in front of him... so he takes you home and reminds you who you really belong to.

——————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————

You have been friends with Matt, Chris, and Nick, the Sturniolo triplets for some time now. You are great friends with the three of them. You guys always hangout, have fun, joke around etc. But what Matt and Nick don’t know, is that you and Chris have been hooking up for some while now. You and Chris never really talked about it, you guys would occasionally flirt when no one was around, you would exchange dirty texts, and fuck around. Nothing really serious. Since you guys aren’t really committed, Chris goes around flirting and fucking other girls too.

Tonight, you and the triplets are going to get dinner. Chris has been trying to get your attention all night, but you are ignoring him. When you get to the restaurant, Matt tells you and Chris to go get a table while he and Nick try to find a parking spot. You and Chris get out of the car and start walking to the restaurant.

As you and Chris walk to the restaurant, he falls into step beside you, his body crowding yours in a way that's both intentional and unconscious. His arm brushes against yours, a deliberate touch meant to get your attention. He scoffs at his failed attempt to gain your attention. Grabbing your arm, he pulls you aside as soon as you start walking towards the restaurant. “Hey, what's your deal?”.

“What do you mean?” You ask feigning confusion.

He raises an eyebrow at you, his eyes glinting in the dim light of the street lamps. His grip on your arm tightens, his face inches from yours. “You know what I mean.” His voice is low, tinged with a mix of annoyance and something deeper, a primal desire.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You say innocently.

Chris lets out a short, humorless laugh. He leans in closer, “Don't play dumb with me.” His hot breath sends a shock of electricity down your spine. "You've been ignoring me all night, and I know you've noticed me trying to get your attention."

“Oh you were? I didn’t catch that.”

Chris rolls his eyes at your response, but a slow smile spreads across his face. “Sure, you didn’t. You're a terrible liar” Chris's eyes narrow, a hint of irritation flashing across his face. “So, stop acting like you don't want anything to do with me." His voice rises, the anger and frustration palpable.

“I’m just not in the mood, yknow…” You say looking at him with a smirk. “And now if you’ll excuse me. We have to get a table.” You pull away his arm and walk to where you ask for a table, and for your luck the guy was cute. “Heyyy, could I get a table for 4? Please?” You ask with a flirty smile and playing with your hair.

Chris grits his teeth as you walk away, his eyes lingering on the sway of your hips. He crosses his arms over his chest, watching as you bat your eyelashes at the cute server. His eyes darkening as he sees the flirty smile and the touch of your hand on the waiter's arm. Chris can't help but feel a surge of jealousy wash over him.

“Jack is it?” You ask as you see the waiter's name tag. “That’s a cute name”

Chris watches as Jack's face lights up at the compliment, his eyes sparkling with amusement. He can't help but feel a pang of irritation and annoyance as he sees you two flirting, laughing and smiling at each other. Chris's jaw clenches as you coo over the waiter's name, the possessiveness in him flaring up. He strides over to where you stand, his tall frame dominating the space. "Cute, huh?" His voice is low and menacing, dripping with sarcasm. “So… Jack. What the fuck is taking you so long to get us a table?”

“Oh- uhm right, sorry” Jack says and leads you guys to your table, and leaves.

You guys get to the table and sit. Chris sits next to you. Chris can't help but glower at you as you take your seats at the table, his irritation and jealousy boiling over. Once Jack is out of sight, he turns to face you, his expression darkening. "What's going on here, huh? Are you trying to get in his pants or something?"

You scoff. “Excuse me?”

Chris leans in, his voice dropping to a low growl. "What the fuck do you think you're playing at?” He tries hard to control his anger, his emotions clouding his judgment. “You were all over him back there.” He reaches out, gripping your thigh possessively under the table. “I saw how you were flirting with him, batting your eyelashes and playing with your hair.”

“Mmh you know… maybe I do want to get in his pants.” You say with a teasing smirk.

Chris's grip on your thigh tightens, anger and jealousy coursing through him. But when he’s about to say something Matt and Nick come to the table. They sit at the two seats in front of you two.

"What's up, fuckers?" Chris tries to sound jovial, but you can hear the edge in his voice. Matt and Nick don't seem to notice, as they engage in a conversation with each other. "You two order yet?"

“Nope not yet.” You say.

“Let’s take a look at the menu.” Matt says. We all grab a menu and start reading through it. “I already know what I want.” Chris says and throws the menu back at the table. You can still feel his hand on your thigh but now he is slowly moving it up.

You breathe heavily and squeeze your thighs. “I’m gonna go to the bathroom really quick.” You say with your voice on edge.

Chris's grip on your thigh tightens, but you manage to stand up and walk away. He watches you go, his mind running wild with thoughts of what he would like to do to you if his brothers weren’t weren’t here. After a few seconds Chris decides to follow you to the bathroom. “I need to take a piss.” He says and stands up. He walks to the ladies bathroom and stands outside of the door waiting for you.

After 2 minutes you take a deep breath and open the bathroom door, ready to go back to the table and just have a nice dinner with the guys. But when you turn around, Chris is right there, standing outside of the bathroom…

“Chris wha-”

Chris quickly grabs you tightly by your arm. “You’re coming with me.” He roughly says, his hot breath hitting your ear. He roughly pulls you towards the table. “Guys I’m taking y/n home, she’s not feeling well.” He says to Nick and Matt.

You look at him confused.

“Oh no what happened?” Nick asks.

“I- uhmm … I’m just not feeling very well… I think my blood pressure is low…” You say that making it up on the spot.

Chris nods his head. “Yeah.”

“Do you need us to come with you? I can drive you home.” Matt says. “Nooo, no it’s fine we’ll uber.” Chris replies.

Chris pulls you out of the restaurant and outside. He looks around for a few seconds and sees an Uber already waiting at the curb. He pushes you into the backseat of the car. The ride to your house is silent. His hand on your thigh all the time.

After ten minutes you two get to your house.

Chris gets out of the Uber and looks at you with an intense gaze. He grabs your arm and practically drags you towards your house after paying. His strong grip squeezes you a little too hard.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” You say as you enter your house.

Chris slams the door shut behind you and pushes you up against it. He leans in close, his face inches from yours. “No. What the fuck is wrong with you!? First you ignore me all fucking night. Then you flirt with that stupid waiter in front of me!”

You scoff and push him away slightly. “Are you jealous or something?”

"Chris's eyes narrow at your scoff and push. "Jealous? Of who? That waiter? He's nothing."

“Yeah, you’re definitely jealous.” You say with a teasing smirk.

Chris's face twists in anger, but you can see the jealousy written all over it. "Shut the fuck up," He grabs your wrist and pinches it, not hard enough to hurt, but enough to show control.

“Right, so you get to flirt and fuck with other girls but I don’t to flirt with another guy? You say.

Chris's grip on your wrist tightens slightly at the accusation. "You're mine.” His voice is low and rough, laced with a threat. "I let you flirt and be whatever you want, but you're never touching anyone else."

You scoff “I'm not yours. and i can do whatever I want”

Chris's eyes narrow even further, his anger growing more and more. "You are mine, whether you like it or not." he growls out. “Or maybe you need a reminder of who you belong to.” His hot breath tickles your skin as he says that. Chris doesn't waste any time, he pulls you roughly to him, slamming his lips against yours in a forceful, possessive kiss. His tongue forces its way into your mouth. His hands roam your body, grabbing and squeezing your curves. He bites your bottom lip hard enough to draw a tiny bead of blood before sucking it into his mouth. His hands grab your hips roughly as he grinds against you, his hardness evident through his pants. "You're mine, and you'll fucking remember it." Chris's lips trail down your neck, sucking and nipping at the sensitive skin. His hands continue to wander over your body, gripping and groping you. His arousal is growing more and more evident against your leg. He quickly picks you up and makes his way to your room throwing you on your bed. “Strip.”

You quickly start removing all your clothes. You get to your underwear, you slip off your bra and when you are about to slip out your clearly soaked panties, Chris speaks. “Stop.”

Chris's eyes darken as he takes in the sight of you in just your pan. He licks his lips, his gaze roving over your body hungrily. Without a word, he reaches out and rips your soaked panties off, leaving you completely naked. "Fuck, look at you,"

You gasp at his actions.

Chris chuckles darkly at your gasp, his eyes never leaving your body. He steps forward, towering over you on the bed. "You like that, don't you?" he growls, his voice low and husky. "Getting manhandled, treated like a dirty little slut." Chris's eyes flick up to your face, expecting you to protest but seeing a spark of arousal instead, a small smirk tugs at the corner of his lips. He reaches out and rubs his hand over your wetness, grinning at your gasp again. "I love that I can make you gasp, make you lose control, make you fucking horny as hell because of me." Chris's hands cup your breasts, squeezing them roughly as he leans down to capture a nipple between his teeth. He bites down hard, tugging and releasing the sensitive bud. "You're already so wet for me, dirty girl," he teases before bringing his fingers to his mouth and sucking them clean.

You whine at his actions. Your pussy clenching around nothing.

Chris groans at your whine, feeling his cock harden in his pants. His teasing fingers, now wet with the taste of your desire, trace down your thigh. "Look at how impatient you are, already whining and clenching with need," He moves between your legs, and his fingers trace your needy pussy lips, teasingly rubbing your clit in slow circles. "You like that, don't you?" he taunts, rubbing his finger against your clit. "You're so fucking wet and empty.” He stops his movements and walks over to your drawer.

You whine and frown your eyebrows as he suddenly stops. “What are you doing?” You ask.

Chris smirks, finding your whine and frown adorable, like a petulant child begging for attention. He chuckles at your reaction. He continues to dig around in your drawer, looking for something, though he won't tell you what. Finally, he holds up a pink vibrator. “I was looking for something so I can tease your wet pussy as long as I want." he replies, holding up the vibrator for you to see. His eyes stay on your face, watching your expression intensely as he flicks it on and off.

You look at your vibrator in his hands and you feel yourself getting wetter. “Ho- how did you know that was there?”

Chris smirks at your reaction, enjoying how flustered and turned on he can get you. "I think you underestimate me.” He moves back over to the bed, letting the vibrator trail lightly over your bare thighs. Your body's reaction to the toy in his hands makes Chris chuckle, his eyes glinting with an amused and lust-filled gaze. "I have my ways, dirty girl," he smirks, bringing the pink vibrator towards your dripping wet pussy.

“mmh fuck” you whine.

Chris's smirk widens at your dirty mouth, feeling his own cock twitch in his pants at how much you want him. He moves the vibrator towards your clit, tracing it lightly and teasingly. "You like that, dirty whore?" You moan and nod. "Fuck, you're soaked." he growls, rubbing the tip of the vibrator over your clit, making you whine and writhe in need.

“Mmhp Chris” you moan as your head leans back.

Chris grins at your submission, feeling a surge of power and desire. He watches your head fall back, a low groan escaping his own lips at the sight of your pleasure. Hearing his name moaned from your lips only makes him more crazy for you, his own cock painfully hard and swollen in his pants. He continues to tease your clit with the vibrator, moving it in slow, deliberate circles. His free hand moves to your breast, squeezing and pinching your nipple roughly. “You like that, you needy little slut?”

“fuck yes Chris” you moan desperately.

The dirty talk only fuels Chris's desire for you further, his swollen cock twitching in his pants. "Fuck, yes you do." Chris groans back, pinching your nipple tighter and quickening the pace of the vibrator on your clit. “You don’t get to cum until I tell you to.”

“w-what”

Chris grins sadistically at your whimper as he slows down the vibrator again, his free hand moving from your breast to grip your throat lightly. "I said no cumming until I give you permission, slut," He growls. "You'll take what I give you and beg for more." Chris pulls the vibrator away from your needy clit, making you whine in protest. "I control when you cum, not the other way around. Now begging for it." He commands.

“Chris mmh please” you whine.

Chris smirks wickedly at your begging, his cock throbbing in response to your pleading voice. "You want this, slut?" he asks teasingly, brushing the tip of the vibrator over your clit again, earning him a loud whine. "mmh fuck” you moan. Chris sees your eyes glazed with need and desire, and he knows he has you right where he wants you.

He moves the vibrator in slow, deliberate circles around your clit. "Beg for it, slut." He demands again, his voice low and husky. Chris grins in satisfaction as he feels your body tensing up, ready to explode. He pulls the vibrator away from your clit again, just as you were about to cum. "I didn't say you could cum yet." He says firmly, enjoying the sight of your frustration.

“Mmhp Chris mmh fuck please” you desperately beg.

Chris chuckled darkly at your desperation, his own cock twitching in his pants. He can see how much you want this, and he loves it. "Do you think you deserve to cum?" He taunts, brushing the vibrator against your clit again. “Ahhh fuck” you moan. "Such a greedy little slut," He teases, pinching your clit between the vibrator and his thumb, making you buck and moan. Then he brings back the vibrator to your clit and applies more pressure.

You’re feeling too much pleasure and can't take it anymore so you cum.

Chris's eyes widen slightly in surprise as you climax, your body shaking and convulsing with pleasure under his touch. "Fucking slut. Did I say you could cum?" he growls, keeping the vibrator pressed against your still-sensitized clit, drawing out your orgasm for as long as he can. Chris smirks at you, satisfied with making you cum and also making you break his rules. Chris abruptly pulls the vibrator away from your oversensitive clit. He throws the device onto the nightstand, the vibrations dying out. Chris smirks at your lack of response. "Slutty little girl, didn't I ask you a question?" He grabs you by your throat.

“I-.. Chris, I'm sorry… I just couldn’t… I cou-”

Chris squeezes your throat tighter, cutting off your words. "I didn't ask for excuses, slut" Chris growls out, squeezing your throat as he leans in closer, his lips brushing against your ear, his breath warm against your skin. "Couldn't control yourself? Couldn't do as you were told?" His hand goes down to your drenched pussy. "Look at the mess you made."

“mmh im so sorry Chris”

Chris tightens his grip around your throat, his fingers digging into your flesh. "You should be sorry, slut. You disobeyed me," he hisses, his other hand roughly spreading your pussy lips apart to inspect the mess you made. Chris releases your throat and grabs a hold of your chin, forcing you to look him in the eye. He sees the regret in your eyes and he smiles evilly. "You know what happens when you don't do as you're told? You get punished."

As you are about to say something, Chris says “On all fours, now.”

He pushes you into your hands and knees, forcing your back arched and presenting your ass to him. “Count.” He roughly says before spanking you in the ass.

“ahhh … one” you can barely say.

Chris smirks as he delivers another stinging slap to your ass. "Two," he counts out, his palm landing with a loud crack on your vulnerable flesh. He continues this rhythm, each spank more forceful than the last, his anger simmering beneath the surface. "Three, four, five..."

He stops spanking you, leaning down to whisper in your ear. "Feeling the burn, slut?" He continues to speak but his tone becomes aggressive, "You need something to focus on besides the pain? How about my thick cock slamming into that wet cunt of yours?”

“mhm please chris”

He takes your desperation and grins at you, standing up once again. He guides his cock to the entrance of your needy hole, pushing inside with a sharp groan. He begins to thrust rapidly, taking all the force and aggression out on your body as he slams into you again and again.

“oh fuck chris” you moan.

Chris grips your hips tightly, driving into you so hard that each thrust sends a wave of pleasure and pain through your entire body. You can hear the sound of skin slapping against skin as he continues to rut into you like an animal. "That's it, whore. Take all of me," He slams into you harder as he picks up speed. Chris reaches around and pinches your clit, rubbing it in time with his relentless thrusts.

“mmh chris im going to cum”

He smirks when he hears you, clearly on the edge of release. "Cum for me." He demands, slamming his hips against yours as his fingers continue to rub at your tight little clit.

“Mmh oh my god” you scream as you cum.

Chris grunts as he feels your walls clench around him, your orgasm milking his cock. He thrusts a few more times before burying himself deep inside you, his hot seed pumping into your spasming pussy. He stays buried inside for a few moments before pulling out, his cum dripping down your thighs. "Oh fuck, yeah”

You fall on the bed tired from your previous orgasms.

Chris chuckles as he watches you collapse onto the bed, finally spent from his aggressive fucking. He admires the sight of his cum leaking from your pussy and smirks. He smirks and gives his cock a few more experimental thrusts, still hard after making you orgasm so many times. He walks over to the bed and pulls you up to sit against the headboard, his hard cock still out and dripping with your juices. He grabs your chin, forcing you to look at him. "Hope you don’t think we’re done here.”

“What?… Chris I-”

Chris cuts you off with a rough kiss, his tongue forcing its way into your mouth as he continues to hold your chin in his dominant grip. His other hand sneaks down to your aching, abused pussy, a finger slipping inside to tease your sensitive insides. When he breaks the kiss, he pulls back and smirks at you, his eyes dark with desire. "You didn't think you were getting out of here that easy, did you? Not after what you did tonight." He moves you further into the bed and sits next to you, his head against the headboard. “Come ride me.”

Chris's gaze never leaves yours as he waits for you to comply. He gives your pussy another teasing stroke with his finger, making sure you know he's not done playing with you yet. "Get on top, whore. I want to see that tight little cunt of yours wrapped around my cock again."

You sat up and barely got on his lap because of how weak your legs are.

Chris smirks as you struggle to obey his command, your legs weak from all the orgasms he's given you. He takes full advantage of your weakened state, grabbing you around the waist and lifting you up to straddle his lap. He grabs your hips, sliding you onto his cock with a groan. "Fuck, just like that.”

“Oh fuck Chris.” You let out a whiny moan feeling overstimulated.

Chris chuckles darkly at your whiny moan, clearly enjoying how overstimulated you are. He holds your hips firmly, guiding you up and down his thick cock. "You like that, don't you, slut? Feeling stuffed full of my cock."

“Mmhp mmh” your mind can’t even puzzle any words to say.

Chris laughs at your incoherent moans, clearly pleased with the effect he's having on you. He picks up the pace, thrusting harder and faster as he holds your hips in a vice-like grip. "Take it. Take every inch of my cock like a good little slut."

“Ahhh Mmhp Chris I.. I can’t.” You moan. “Fuck im going to cum” you let out.

Chris smirks as he hears you moaning his name and begging for release. He thrusts harder and faster, determined to make you explode with pleasure again. "You're gonna cum for me again, aren't you? Say my name as you cum all over my cock."

“Mmhp Chris ahh” you squirt all over his cock.

Chris feels your pussy clench around his cock as you cum, your juices gushing out to coat his shaft. He groans at the sensation, his own orgasm building rapidly. "Fuck, that's it, squirt all over my cock like the dirty little slut you are."

You start to pull yourself up, and he slams you down.

Chris smirks at you, slamming you down on his length again and again. "Just stay down there, slut. Stay juicy around my dick." Chris smirks. He's so turned on right now, he won't even leave you a moment to recover. His hands hold your hips still being deep balls inside you. “Oh fuck.” Chris growls low and dark as his cock twitches with each spurt of cum he fires into your pussy, making sure you take every last drop before pulling out, smacking your ass again.

You let out a final moan and fall onto the bed.

Chris watches as you fall back onto the bed, spent and exhausted from the relentless pounding. He smirks, feeling a sense of satisfaction at having taken you to the edge and beyond. “I hope it’s clear who you belong to.” He leans in and grabs your jaw. “You belong to me and only me. Got it?”

You nod in response feeling exhausted.

Chris gives your face a rough, possessive kiss before pulling away. He looks down at your body, still splayed out on the sheets with his cum leaking out of your used pussy. “Lets clean you up.”

——————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————

Sorry this took to long to upload!

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[bunniehrtz]

“Touch me while your bros play grand theft auto” with Abby 😵‍💫😵‍💫

cw: cockwarming, titplay, risky business in front of your friends

i need to re-listen to the anthology

they’d been playing for hours. all 6 of them. abby, manny, owen, mel, nora and leah. you didn’t want to join in, you didn’t care about this game. didn’t see the appeal. however, you saw the appeal in abby’s arm wrapped around your shoulder, your head against her chest. you were getting restless and needy, as always. abby notices. she puts the controller down, everyone turning to look at her. you and abby were on an armchair, manny and leah on a sofa and owen, mel and nora on a duvet on the floor. “one second, just gotta do something,” abby says, picking you up to place you on her lap. you’re cuddling under a blanket, now feeling incredibly grateful. you gasp lightly as the bulge you’re sat on top of. your eyes go wide, looking up at abby. she smirks, picking the controller back up. you sink back down onto her chest, trying to ignore the ache in your core.

“anyone else want to play?” she asks, your eyes almost perking up at the question. manny takes the controller from her, everyone gazing at the screen, or their phones. her hands grip your hips, clearing her throat as she leans in to whisper in your ear. “don’t make a sound,” she bucks her hips up gently. your eyes shut at the feeling, biting down on your bottom lip. you hide your face in the crook of abby’s neck. leah spots this from the corner of her eye, furrowing her brows at you. “she’s okay, tired,”

abby says for you, and she looks back at the screen. abby lifts your hips up gently, pulling her silicone cock from her sweatpants. she leans back in. “you’re going to sit on this dick until i tell you to get off. okay, baby?” she orders, you nod immediately. abby peels off your pyjama shorts and your underwear, pushing you back down on her dick so, very gently. you have to bite down on abby’s shoulder to stop a moan escaping your mouth. the feeling of your teeth on her skin makes abby gasp and she quickly covers it with a cough. you let out a tiny giggle that forces abby to push you down. “abby!” you scream. you cover your mouth quickly, looking over your shoulder at everyone. no one even looked. “naughty girl,” she whispers, her hands coming off and out of the blanket, now behind her head. your eyes roll back, the sight of her toned biceps forcing you back into hiding.

minutes that feel like hours pass until abby’s hands snake back under the blanket, making their way past your hips, where you expected them to stay, up into your shirt. she starts kneading, groping your tits while maintaining a conversation like it’s nothing. her calm, soft face drives you crazy. you look up at her, trying to get her attention. nothing. your bottom lip stuck between your teeth, you can’t dare open them. your breathing is heavy and if anyone were to turn around they’d see you both moving up and down with each breath. each soft whimper that leaves your mouth is punished by a pinch to your nipple, only almost forcing another out. “so needy. just wait until everyone’s asleep and i’ll fuck you so good, baby. gotta wait for it.”

[crypticreid]

KINKTOBER DAY ONE

October 1st -- Praise

happy first day of kinktober 🎃🎃🎃🎃!!!

masterlist

summary: You've been secretly hooking up with your coworker Spencer for two months. He notices something about you and wants to try something new. (I personally imagined circa season 10 Reid, but you do you bestie 😘)

warnings: praise, lots of 'good girls', oral [m/f both receiving and giving], light dom behavior, finger sucking, piv, safe sex practices, and a little bit of begging

word count: 3.1k (this one got away from me a little bit oops)

this is adult content. 18+ plus only. minors do not interact!

You had never wanted to be one of those people, a girl with a huge crush on her coworker, but then you’d meet Spencer Reid. A year ago, you’d waved at him instead of shaking his hand when Hotch had introduced the two of you, and you’d felt the first flutter of butterflies. You had tried desperately to ignore your feelings, but the more you got to know him, the harder you fell. And then, about two months ago, you’d become another cliche. The girl who was sneaking around and secretly hooking up with her coworker. 

Now you were trying to avoid touching your knee against his as you sat on the plane on the way home from a case. The last time you’d simply accidentally brushed your hand against his, it had been like an electrical shock between the two of you. So it is just easier to avoid touching at all costs while in the presence of your other coworkers. 

The words in the book that you’re holding in your hands are absolute gibberish as you can’t focus on anything except the way Spencer’s hands glide over the page of notes he’s re-reading. You've always known he has captivating hands, but now you know intimately just how capable those hands were. This case was long, and before that, Spencer had been at a conference for four days. He hasn’t touched you in almost a week, and you’re becoming impatient. But you both had wisely made the promise that as long as you were on clock, so to say, you were only coworkers and nothing more. 

You look up as you hear him say your name. 

“Would you mind reading over this? I’m not sure it makes any sense.” He hands you his leather bound notebook. You place your book on your lap and look over into his eyes. 

“Me? I really don’t think I’m the person who…” 

Spencer interrupts you, “I trust your opinion.” It’s a simple statement, but it sets your skin aflame all the same. To hide your reaction, you focus on reading Spencer’s notes. 

“I think it’s great, Spencer. But you’re presenting this to college students, so I think it would be beneficial to use examples they may have heard in the news or at least know ‘cause of the insane amount of Netflix documentaries.” You roll your eyes as you mention the oversaturation of true crime television. But then suddenly you feel self-conscious and hand back his notebook. “I mean, I don’t know. It’s just a small idea.” 

“No, it’s insightful. You’re brilliant.” You can feel your skin heat in embarrassment, not comfortable with the compliment. Compliments often make you uneasy and you don’t know why. Well, that’s not entirely true, but you didn’t feel like profiling yourself to better understand this aspect. 

Spencer’s eyes observe you, and you watch as his tongue slips out and wets his bottom lip as he thinks. “I mean it.” He emphasizes. 

“Thank you,” you say quietly.   

“Good girl.” The words glide from Spencer’s mouth almost absent-mindedly and barely audible as he returns to his work. If he notices how much deeper your blush becomes, he doesn’t say anything. And you pretend you didn’t even hear him, or else you might make a fool of yourself.

Several hours later, you’re finally back at your apartment and getting into pajamas. As you pull a tank top over your head, you allow your mind to think about Spencer.

Good girl. 

He said it so flippantly, practically under his breath. Did he even mean for you to hear it? Did he know how it would make your heart hammer? You play it over again and again, letting yourself bask in the feeling. 

There’s a knock on your door, so you quickly pull on an old pair of yoga pants and race to your door. A brisk glance through your peephole causes that all too familiar heart tremor. Dr. Spencer Reid at your door, as though you’d summoned him with your thoughts. 

You swing open the door and let your eyes trail down his body. 

“I meant it.” He says immediately. 

“What do you mean?” You want to reach for him. He’s still dressed for work, and it takes everything in you not to wrap your fingers around his tie and pull him into your apartment. 

“When I called you brilliant.” He replies casually. 

“You came all this way to call me brilliant?” 

He smirks. “No, I came all this way to do this,” as he talks he steps toward you. 

You let a small breath of anticipation escape before he has his hands on either side of your face and is pressing his lips to yours. Your own hands find their way first to grasp at his waist and then around to his back, pulling him impossibly closer to you, desperate for the feel of his body against yours. The harsh sharp lines of him melding into the soft, lush curves of you. 

He moves you further into your apartment, shuts your door, and then pushes you up against the cool wood of the door, all without pulling his lips away from yours. Goosebumps spring to life across your skin as your body tries to process the head spinning sensation of the warmth of his body, combining with the chill of the door against your back. His hands are in your hair, possessive and needy, and you moan into his mouth. 

You feel the puffs of breath against your mouth as he laughs softly and then pulls away, his hands come to rest between your neck and shoulders. “I’ve missed you.” 

A small smile curves your freshly kissed lips. “It’s been like two hours since I saw you.” 

“I’ve missed being able to touch you.” He amends. The thumb of his right hand starts to move up and down the skin of your neck, and you wonder if he can feel how fast your heart is beating. His eyes search your face. “Did you like it when I called you a good girl?” 

Your lips part as if to reply, but no words come out. 

“Answer me.” He demands softly, his words are never harsh, but they still hold a sense of power. 

“Yes. I liked it,” you admit. 

He continues to watch you as his mind works, and then he makes a low sound of approval from his throat. “And would you like me to call you a good girl more often?” 

Need and want pools low in your belly, but you take a second to wet your lips before answering. You want your voice to come across as strong and sure, so there is no question that you want this. “Yes, please.” 

Your head is swimming in the overwhelming sensation of his lips back on yours in a matter of seconds. His hands explore your body, grazing and grasping onto your breasts before settling on your hips. He uses his knee to push your legs apart, and you move without resistance. A guttural moan breaks free from your throat as that same knee connects with the place that has been begging for friction since the moment Spencer put his hands on you. 

Spencer breaks away from the kiss. “You’re so beautiful when you moan like that,” he murmurs against your skin as he kisses, licks, and nips along your jaw and neck. 

Your hips jerk involuntarily, but it instantly causes a wave of pleasure as you slide against him. “Do that again, baby.” You do as you’re told and again and again. His mouth continues across your clavicle, and then lower until his teeth scrape against one of your nipples over the fabric of your tank top. You gasp and push yourself closer to him, but he pulls away. 

He lowers himself to the ground as he works to push down your yoga pants. As soon as you step out of them, the pants are thrown across the room, Spencer not bothering to pay attention. All of his attention is on you. 

“Look at you, pretty girl.” His thumb traces over the damp spot in your underwear while his other hand travels up your leg, sending zaps of pleasure straight to your core. 

“All for me?” His eyes flash up to yours. 

“I’m yours,” you answer. 

“That’s my good girl.” You twist your hands into his hair when his mouth makes contact with your still clothed pussy, his tongue swiping against you. He only teases you for a second before he can’t take it anymore and pulls down your underwear to be able to taste you without a barrier. The room fills with the obscene sounds of him lapping at your core as he lavishes praises on you in between licking and sucking. “So perfect, so goddamn perfect.” 

You throw your head back with a deep moan. 

Spencer continues, undisturbed. “Yes. Keep moaning for me. I want your neighbors to hear how good you are for me.” His tongue circles and caresses your clit. “Do you want my fingers inside of you? Tell me.” 

“Yes, oh god. Fuck. Spencer.” You can’t think straight. The only thing your brain is capable of is focusing on how good you feel. 

Spencer obliges your request and plunges two fingers into you. Your fingers tighten in his hair. “I can’t believe how wet you are. And you’re taking my fingers so good. I bet you’d take my cock even better.” He hooks his fingers and massages against the swollen pressure point inside you. 

You lean forward over him, trying to keep your legs steady. 

“Are you gonna come for me, sweetheart?” You simply nod your head even though he can’t see with his face buried in your pussy. “You’re gonna come all over my face and my fingers because you’re my good girl, aren’t you?” 

Your legs shake, but Spencer uses his free hand to hold onto your hip and hold you steady. 

“It’s okay, you can let go. I’ve got you.” His fingers buried deep within you speed up and he focuses all of his attention on the pattern of his tongue against your clit, ramping up the building pleasure that’s threatening to bubble over. “You’ve made such a mess, a beautiful mess. Look at you, so good. So good.” 

You clench around him. “Yes, that’s it. I want you to come. Just like that.” You jerk against his fingers and jaw as the pressure cascades and overflows inside you. His name is the only thing you can say in between your moans. “I love when you say my name when you come.” His fingers slow their pace, and his mouth becomes less frantic as he guides you through your orgasm and the small after-shocks. 

When he finally pulls away completely, you watch slack-jawed as he takes his two fingers and puts them in his slick mouth, cleaning away traces of you. “Tasting you makes me so hard, I love it.” You lean back against the door with a smile. 

“Do you want me to help with that?” 

He laughs. “I’m not even close to finishing with you, my beautiful girl.” When he starts to reach for you, you grab onto his tie first and pull him closer. You work on his tie as you kiss his mouth, tasting the remnants of yourself.

In a matter of seconds, you have his tie off and thrown into the abyss, your shaking fingers focusing on unbuttoning his shirt. His eyes watch as you strip him of his shirt and then pull on his belt. But he can’t keep his hands off you, and they create a path over your skin. You undo the clasp, the tingling sound of metal like a beckoning call. 

After taking off his belt and letting it drop to the floor, you also head toward the floor onto your knees. Spencer’s hand’s end up in your hair, and your hands travel up his thighs to the noticeable bulge in his pants. “Do you see what you do to me? Only you can make me this hard.” 

You bite your bottom lip and work to take off his pants and underwear as he kicks off his shoes. Your eyes look up to his eyes, and he smiles at you. “Go on, I know you’re desperate for it.” One hand holds onto the base of him as your tongue circles the pink tip. He lets out a sharp breath at the contact. 

You watch his reactions, flicking and teasing his head, gathering the stickiness of his precum on his tongue. Then you circle your lips around him and inch down, your hand sliding up and down on him to meet your mouth. His mouth is wide open as he watches you, the eye contact between the two of you almost overwhelming. Your body doesn’t seem to care that you just had an earth-shattering orgasm because you can feel the steady thrum of need building. 

“Are you getting wet again just from sucking me off?” You nod and take him deeper in your mouth, the hand resting on his thigh feels a muscle twitch. “You have the perfect mouth.” His fingers in your hair pull slightly, not enough to cause pain, but just enough to cause you to moan on his dick. 

“If you keep doing that I’m gonna come down that pretty throat.” You moan again, and he makes a low humming noise. “Is that what you want, sweet girl?” 

You pull off of him, a string of spit following you, “yes.” You take both hands and twist and stroke up and down him with a smile on your messy lips. 

“Open your mouth.” You do as he says, sticking your tongue out flat. He takes his two fingers and sticks them in your mouth, and you instantly start to suck on them, never stopping the motion of your hands. “My perfect, beautiful girl.” He mutters and then pulls his fingers from your mouth. Before you can put your mouth back on him, he’s stepping away and then helping you stand up. 

When you’re on your feet, he kisses you slowly, allowing his tongue to explore your mouth, and you reach down with one hand to continue to stroke him. He breaks the kiss and lightly guides you to turn around and bend over, using your hands to hold yourself up on the door. “You’re so good for me. Stay there.” You look over your shoulder and watch him find his pants to grab a condom. He quickly unwraps it and slides it on before returning to you. 

He glides his hands over the back of your thighs and over your ass appreciatively, then squeezes your ass. “Are you going to take all of me?” The whispers tickling the back of your neck as he leans over you toward your ear, you shiver against him. 

“Yes.” 

He trails a hand down your spine as he pulls away and then helps you to set your legs further apart. You bite your lip, so ready for him, when he squeezes your hips. Both of you moan deeply as he guides himself into you, inching himself in until he’s seated completely. His hands are back on your hips, holding you in place. He leans forward and places a kiss on your back. He whispers in your ear again, “now you’re gonna be a good girl for me, and you’re not gonna come until I tell you you can. Do you understand?” 

You nod swiftly. 

He presses another kiss. “Words please, sweet girl.” 

“I understand.” 

He stands fully and slowly starts to pull himself out of you, dragging against every inch of your core. When he’s out fully, he pushes forward, again at that agonizing slow pace. You squirm against him, needing more. “You think you can take all of it, baby?” 

“Yes. Yes. Please. Please.” 

“You’re so beautiful begging for me.” You think he’s going to continue to tease you, but he doesn't. He starts to move faster and faster, building up a steady rhythm. Your nails scratch against the wood of your door. “That’s it, so good. I only ever feel this good with you. Only you can take my dick like this. You take it so perfect.” He gasps and rambles as he pumps into you. 

The base of your spine zaps pleasure through your body and you shake on him. 

“Don’t come yet, baby. Not yet. I could spend forever inside you.” 

You feel your arms start to get weak, but Spencer holds so tight on you that you know that you’re stable. “I need to –” you gasp and squeeze your eyes shut. 

“I know. I know. But you can wait, I know you can. Do you know how I know you can?” 

You shake your head. 

“Because you’re my good girl.” You press your lips together and moan. “Yeah, and you’re gonna wait until I tell you. And then you’re going to touch that swollen little clit of yours. It’s aching isn’t it.” 

“Yes!” You practically shout. “Spencer, please.” 

“Beg again.” 

“Please. Spencer. Oh god, please. I need it. I need it.” 

“Touch your clit, baby.” You cry out as soon as one of your hands makes contact. “You still can’t come, honey.” 

You whimper, but try so hard not to give yourself over to the pleasure. 

“You’re all mine, aren’t you.” 

“Yes, yours all yours. Only yours forever.” 

He bites out a harsh moan, and you know he’s trying just as hard as you to keep it together. “You look so pretty.” The words are just rambles, almost imperceptible. “Come for me. Come all over me.” 

You do so instantly, Spencer tightens his grip on you to hold you steady as you lose yourself in the feeling. He comes with whimpers and sighs and deep grunts. When he finally stops moving, your legs are gelatinous, so he holds you tight against him, your back against his chest. He pulls out of you and then turns you around in his arms. 

“You’re perfect.” He peppers light kisses across your face and lips and neck. “You did so good.” His hands are wrapped around you, both holding you steady but also keeping close to him. “I’m so proud of you.” 

Your eyes flutter closed, and he kisses your lips fully. When he pulls away, you open your eyes and look up into his eyes. “Are you okay?” He checks in softly. 

“Yes.” 

“Good.” He kisses you again chastely. “That was beautiful. You’re beautiful.” Another kiss and his hands massage down your back and your hips, checking to see if you’re sore. 

“I’m fine.” You answer before he can ask. 

“Did you like that,” he asks earnestly. 

“I loved it.” 

He smiles brightly and you match it. “Are you hungry?” 

“Starving.”

[hyukakisses]

— emo soobin as sid jenkins

pairings: emo soobin as sid jenkins x fem reader

plot: random emo soobin as sid jenkins from skins uk headcanons

warnings: smoking cigarettes, reader & soobin are home bodies, cursing, fluff, friends to lovers, loser soobin (mentions of being close with yeonjun), yeonjun is tony, shy sweet reader, kinda imagined reader as watered down cassie blehhh, corny corny corny, eventual loss of virginity (from both ends), clingy reader, crybaby reader (my brand)

soobin didn’t really have much hobbies. unless you counted jacking off to hentai, or hanging out with yeonjun. “is hanging out with yeonjun all you do soobs?” “pretty much yeah” “you’re never gonna get a girlfriend with these body anime pillows you know”

soobin had known you because you were friends with yeonjun, although you weren’t that extroverted as the friend group you still got along with everybody pretty well. but naturally you were closest to soobin. “can we hang out? after school today?” “yeah sure i’ll tell yeonjun” “no.. like just us two you said you wanted to play this game with me league of legends right?”

“im no good at this game” whines spill past your pink lips which was a lie, you were good at the game. you were good at every game you’ve ever touched but you liked the way soobin guided you through league of legends

“do you want one?” soobin speaks showing off his box of cigarettes to you; mouth full of a lit up cigarette. you shook your head “i don’t know how to smoke” soobin snorts “what? come here let me teach you”

“there’s this party yeonjun’s hosting y/n-“ “i say we stay at home i miss you”

“i customized our controllers myself” soobin’s large hands trace yours as you hold onto your pretty pink ps5 controller. “when we put our controllers like this.. see? it makes a heart” soobin grabs his controller placing it over yours making your heart race :(

when you heard the real reason why yeonjun kept insisting soobin came over for another one of his infamous parties, you’ve lost it.

you knew soobin was a virgin as you were one yourself but yeonjun going as far as scouting other girls from school to fuck your bestfriend really made you upset.

but you being too much of a pussy to act on how you felt about literally anything you just straight up avoided soobin like the plague. assuming the emo boy already fucked some random chick and whatever feelings you thought you had for him immediately disappearing

soobin was clueless; not understanding why you were ignoring him. taking a puff out of his cigarette going over and over with himself wondering why did you change? did yeonjun say something to push you away?

“why are you ignoring me?” soobin didn’t even give you time to react to him sneaking into your bedroom through your window “and don’t give me that ‘i don’t know what you’re talking about’ bullshit why have you been ignoring me?” “just leave me alone soob i don’t wanna see you again” with a light shove you try pushing the tall male out of your window. “not until you tell me what’s going on!” “i love you okay! and you just fucked some other girl! and that’s really mean!” you blurt out with a cry, you felt so pathetic crying over something so stupid.

you still went along with your plan to ignore soobin after that though, yelling at him to leave you alone until eventually soobin had enough and decided to reach you through a pigeon.

you thought the gesture was a little excessive but you ultimately forgave the timid boy; you thought soobin going as far as that to prove a point and apologize was sweet.

you spent a lot of time feeling guilty for not hearing soobin out sooner; re-reading his letter over and over again, thinking of the right words to say. you feared soobin moved on and liked somebody new

“binnie?” your voice small and shaky from your previous crying session as you approached soobin from behind, the tall male wearing a black beanie and unsurprisingly smoking a cigarette while seated on the sidewalk in front of his house.

before soobin could answer to your callings, you immediately lunge forward the emo boy trapping him into a tight hug. “im so sorry for ignoring you!” you cry out your body trembling at the december cold. “i should have believed you when you said you were a virgin and only had eyes for me! im so sorry” your cries quickly turned to loud sobs

soobin just let out a sigh putting out his cigarette before pulling you closer with both hands, rubbing your back in circles as an attempt to calm your cries. “i don’t understand where you got the idea of me getting play i stay holed in my room all day and only talk to you, i don’t exactly have girls lining up to take my virginity”

you sniffled shocked by the revelation, “you.. you don’t?” “of course i don’t” soobin laughed his deep voice sending butterflies down your stomach. “and to be frank the only person i’d wanna lose my virginity to is you” the black haired male pauses “that is if you’d let me be your boyfriend first”

a/n: no smut because i miss soobin :( it’s his birthday too </3 happy soobin day 🙁

[fernandopiastri28]

high for this ~ oscar piastri

Notes:

i am officially finished with holidays and back to school :/ so im going to be posting a lot less but i do have a few works just rotting in my drafts so i'll probably just be changing the names of characters and posting them. (not proof read so i apologise if there's any mistakes)

warnings: smut, weed, drug use, mdni

Oscar mindlessly lays sprawled out on his bed, his muscles aching from the gym earlier in the day. He tenderly rubs his hamstring, trying to nurse it back to not being too sore for his match tomorrow. 

He has some music playing as quietly as possible, a pulsing tune of some heavy rap. It’s not really to his taste, but he’s bored with his own playlists at the moment. His phone is near the foot of his outstretched left leg, while his right leg is tucked up towards his torso, his knee pointing high towards the ceiling. Both hands are hard at work around his right leg, his fingers pressing into the tough flesh.

He feels a buzz travel through his left foot as his nails dig into his skin. He makes a note to cut them. He hears the buzz too, this time over the sound of the music. He sits up awkwardly, wincing at the strain on his leg. Using his left hand, he picks up his phone and checks the two new messages he’s received. 

It’s Talia, unsurprisingly. She should be asleep, though, she promised him she’d start working on fixing her sleep schedule. He clicks the notifications, squinting to see the messages with the medical white lights flashing in his eyes in comparison to the darkened room.

tals🧡: you up?

tals🧡: do u wanna come over

Oscar shifts around in his bed so his back is pressed against a stack of pillows. He brings his hand away from his hamstring, ignoring the dull shoot of pain that runs up his leg once it loses his attention.  

They don’t do a lot of sneaking over to each other's houses, simply because they can see enough of one another during school days, so it isn’t anything essential. They get in all the kissing, cuddling, and make outs they want to during the day, so if she’s suggesting this, it means sex. 

Not necessarily just sex, anything within the umbrella of sexual activity. Oscar shifts his hips, trying to decide what he wants to do. They live pretty far from each other, meaning for him to sneak over, it's a 25-minute walk each way since he can’t just take the family car. It’s late—nearing midnight—and he’s sore. On the other hand, he’s horny.

And at Talia’s house, she doesn’t live with her parents. She lives with two of her close friends, skipped out on the college experience after her first year. Oscar didn’t get that luxury, much like his older sisters. Both of them lived at home for uni. But while she’s off now in France, he’s still a third year university student. Since her family won’t even be there, they don’t have to worry about being sneaky or quiet.

Oscar: Yeah. See you soon

He unplugs his phone and slips his feet into the pair of slides that are sitting at the foot of his bed. He opens his wardrobe, grazing his fingers over the line up of shirts that rest there. He grabs a graphic white t-shirt, wrestling it on. He cracks open his door, walking past his sister’s and the guest room, both vacant. His parents are on the level upstairs, so they can’t hear any disturbance he’s making. 

He settles for catching the bus instead, unwilling to walk up to an hour. He sits down in a row of empty seats, ducking his head down and popping an earbud in. There’s a scarce number of other people on the bus, two girls sitting close together, their heads spinning drunkenly. An old man, greying hair and a newspaper in his callused hands.

tals🧡: come thru window. sammy will bark otherwise.

Oscar replies with the hard thought out reply of a thumbs up before re-pocketing his phone, staring mindlessly out of the window at the dark surroundings that whip by. 

Oscar gets off at his stop 10 minutes later, and he’s the last person on the bus by that point. He approaches Talia’s house, not even bothering to go through the front door- Sammy would bark and wake the whole house up. He clicks open the gate, dragging it out only just enough to slip in. He walks across the side of the house, tapping on her bedroom window once he gets to it. He presses a hand to his pocket, making sure the pack of condoms he grabbed are still there.

The curtains swish open and Talia’s standing there, fiddling to get the window open. Once it's open, he feels a rush of cold air hitting him, accompanied by the smell of something almost like diesel. “Hey,” He grins as she leans down. 

She narrowly avoids the kiss he’s going for, giving him one on the corner of his mouth. “Sorry- god, it’s dark,” Her shadow rubs her eyes, reaching out a hand to help him in. 

Climbing in through the window isn’t a difficult task- just slightly uncomfortable. His crotch rubs against the window pane as he brings his second leg over into her room. Talia wraps her arms around his waist as soon as he’s inside. “Hi, Oscccc,” She looks up at him, her teeth gleaming white. 

Just as Oscar is about to reply, the petrol smell hits him even harder. He crinkles his nose, confused as to what it is. “Tals, what the hell have you been smoking in here?,” He laughs, his hands grabbing at her ass to get her to wrap her legs around his waist. His voice is thick with sarcasm, Talia is the furthest thing from a druggy possible.

“Weed,” She rubs her lips into his shoulder, mouthing at the fabric of her shirt. Her mouth is dry, barely wetting the cloth. Oscar’s eyebrows knit, tensing in confusion. “Got a joint, was bored,” She mumbles. 

He doesn’t believe what he’s hearing. At the same time, it’s late- his mind is cloudy anyways. He looks past her, at her bed where there’s a metal tin and a joint laying on top of it. Explains the smell then. “Fuck Talia,” He lets out a deep breath, “Maddie and Amber can definitely smell it,” He groans.

Talia laughs, her voice thick and loopy. “Nah, they cleared out tonight so I could do this.” She pulls away from the embrace, tugging him after her by his shirt. She falls back against the bed, her eyes clearly red rimmed from the dim lighting over her bed. “Cmonnn Opie, wanna get stoned with you,”

It’s so strange to see her like this, but he’d be lying if he said it wasn’t hot. It’s so unexpected, such a pleasant surprise from his usually wound up and rule following girlfriend. Oscar’s resistance weakens, the sight of her laying there- a goofy grin plastered across her voice is enough to make the strong man give in. 

He hovers over her on the bed, a knee on either side of her hips and a hand on either side of her head. “You’re insane,” His mouth meets red, puffy lips for a kiss. She’s hungry for it, bringing her hands up to his hair to tug him down. 

“More,” Talia begs, her voice breathy. Her pupils are huge and there's a spacey look in her eyes. Oscar teases her, shaking his head as he slightly resists kissing her any further than little pecks.

“I want a drag,” He whispers, reaching over her to where the blunt is precariously resting. He places it in between his lips, the bitter taste already seeping into his mouth. “Light it up,” He murmurs around the lump in his mouth. 

Her mouth and ears feel as if they’ve been packed with cotton, his voice is far away and just barely a noise. “You don’t know how to,” She giggles weakly, her fingers pinching the fabric of his shirt that hangs down onto her.

Oscar gets off of her, sitting against the head of her bed. His legs are spread, his body slumped down comfortably. “Teach me,” He pats the space in front of his lap, his eyes looking up through his lashes. Talia’s mind is foggy with weed, lust, and need. She’s willing to do anything. 

“Take this,” she pushes a plastic water bottle into one of his hands, already unscrewed and partially drunk. “You’re gonna cough a lot- the water will help with that,” she explains, leaning forward with her hands propped up on his quads, pushing the hem of his shorts higher up. 

She reaches over to where the bottle had been and her fingers feel numb as they wrap around the lighter. “You feel good?” She asks as he twists the joint around between his lips. He doesn’t quite know how to answer, it feels like a question for after he’s actually smoked it. He nods regardless, tensing his leg muscles under her hands.

“I’m gonna light it, okay?” Another question from her. Her voice is becoming harder to understand, the true effects of the weed settling into her. It’s bizarre to him, this whole situation. “And you just try to inhale as much as possible,” She waits for a nod of competency from him before continuing. “Don’t let it just rest in your throat- it’ll burn. If you can’t do a lot, just do it in small bits,” 

Oscar’s hand snakes behind her, resting on the small of her back. “Ready,” He mumbles awkwardly. She clicks down on the lighter and a flame flickers, wavering just below his nose. 

“Don’t stress it,” She can see how his eyebrows are still furrowed and his nails are digging into the fabric of her shirt. It’s almost euphoric at first, then it’s hell. Heat fills his mouth and he’s coughing and wheezing. He did exhale- probably too much. 

He feels Talia’s hands all over him, her coldness contrasting against the warmth throbbing through himself. She takes the spliff from his mouth, sucking down on it herself. Oscar watches her hazily, his bottom lip tucked under teeth. 

“How long have you been doin’ this?” The words feel as if they’re not coming from him. Jesus, surely he’s not baked already. He feels the heavy weight of the joint being pushed between his lips again, his question seemingly going unanswered. 

He takes it, breathing it in again. He doesn’t let it rest in his throat, he focuses on the inhale. He doesn’t cough as much this time, but he still guzzles down what’s left in the bottle. 

They spend a few minutes alternating the spliff, blowing air into eachothers faces. The room reeks of weed and it’s boiling hot. He wipes the back of his neck with his hand, a line of sweat gathering there. She twists the hem of his shirt between her index and thumb, pulling it up slightly. She doesn’t need to ask- he takes it off for her. 

“I started when I first moved here,” She finally answers his question from earlier, dragging a thumb down his cheek, rubbing the back of his jawline. “I think one of Mads’ friends gave her a bunch because she was moving- couldn’t take ‘em. Us three smoked them one night, it was fun,” She mumbles. It means she’s only been doing it for about 3 years now. 

He tilts his head, resting it against a pillow. She presses the pad of her thumb into his bottom lip that he’s unconsciously pouting out- asking for either another drag or a kiss. “Wanted to introduce you,” Her lips turn into a smirk, her eyes half-lidded.

“And why’s that?” He teases, his other hand moving down to her ass. Talia looks to the side behind him, a knowing look on her face. She pulls herself into his lap, effectively straddling him.

“I wanted to get high,” She states plainly, “and when I’m high- I’m horny. Wanted to be like that with you,” Her eyes are bright and her cheeky are rosy. Oscar kisses her cheek, experimenting with how his mouth is getting drier and more uncomfortable. Once he feels some moisture returning, he kisses further along her jaw. 

She has the spliff in her mouth which forces him away from her mouth. He focuses on her jaw and neck, suckling near her collarbone. She moans, tugging his hair and effectively his head back up. She places the joint in his mouth again and pulls on the pillow behind him. He tilts his head enough for her to move it out of the way, leaving him laying down almost completely flat. 

 He watches dazily as she pulls her top off, leaving her in a lacy white bra. He reaches out, his fingers barely feeling her flesh. He knows he’s touching her, she’s making noises to confirm it. “ More , more , fuck ,” She’s begging, her voice so desperate. Oscar wishes he wasn’t so fucking spacey right now so he could see how wanton she was over him. 

He tips his head forward, looking past where smoke is burning into his eyes. He’s apparently not just touching her bra, he’s touching her fully exposed breast. He hasn’t realised up until this point that he’s actually hard. 

“Can I shotgun you?” She asks, her fingers snaking over his nipples. He whimpers at the touch and his mouth drops open around the blunt. He knows he’s out of it, but he’s consciously thinking enough to know that shotgunning is either claiming the front seat in a car, or piercing a beer can and then drinking it as fast as possible.

He settles with the assumption it must be the second one. He lols his head to the side, searching for where the beer is. “Yeah,” He hums, his hand dropping down over the edge of the bed and his hand swinging with the intention of hitting a can that isn’t actually there.

Talia laughs, tugging on his bicep. “Shotgun- I puff smoke into your mouth,” She explains, her voice all raspy from being so dry. Oscar licks over his teeth, his mouth still painfully dry. His mind feels empty, the only resounding thought is just talia, talia, talia. There are a few other ideas, sex stuff, nothing coming close to being as important as making her happy.

She leans forward, plucking the joint from his mouth. He gets a breath of fresh air and begins to gasp for it- a telltale sign he’s had too much in one go. He hollows his cheeks, cleaning the taste of smoke out of his mouth with spit. It’s a useless attempt as it’s already well stained.

She slides two fingers into his mouth, pressing down on his bottom teeth. She lays down on him, her legs still hooked around his hips and a hand pressing to the headboard above him. Their chests are pressing together, her boobs heavy on him. He stares at them, shamelessly, his cock getting even harder to the point he’s beginning to actually feel it. 

“Can you suck my cock?” His voice is strangled and on the verge of incoherency because of her digits pressing into his tongue. She nods, kissing the tip of his nose. Her other hand is still holding onto the spliff, just sliding it against her wettened bottom lip. She finally sucks down on it, her lips twisting around it to keep the smoke in.

His mouth opens out of instinct, his eyes going bright just thinking about her mouth. The second their lips meet and he feels a slow release of smoke into his mouth, he feels like he’s dying. His eyes roll back and he grips a hand to the back of her head, pushing their mouths into each other’s harder.

He’s kissing her like it’s the only thing keeping him alive. It’s disgustingly dirty, a combination of spit, teeth, tongues and far too much moaning. Being stoned apparently just makes him feel everything . His lips are on fire, his throat is on fire, his eyes are on fire, his dick is on fire. 

Their mouths pull apart, sticky from the remnants of lip gloss that Talia has on. He peppers her face with a few more kisses, desperate for the stinging burn. They look at each other for a few moments, a complete disconnect from the two of them and the rest of the world. 

“You still want it?” She’s semi sitting up now, her elbows resting on where his hips are poking out from his low sitting shorts. His mind goes blank at the question, unsure of what she could possibly asking.

“What?” He lets out a puff of air, his hand mindlessly travelling through her hair. She nudges low down on his abdomen with her nose, making a weird squeaking whine. 

“Suck you off,” She looks up at him, the green in her eyes barely just a thin ring around her blown up pupils. Oscar nods, shifting further down the bed. Her fingers hook into his waistband, an invitation. His eyes flicker shut, already wasted off the feeling of her hands tugging his shorts down. 

Cold air whacks into the tops of his thighs, the dark fluffs of hair standing up. Oscar doesn’t need to tell her what to do, it seems like every time she’s gotten baked before this has been spent with her preparing for this. 

Talia begins aimlessly mouthing at his crotch, licking and kissing over where the head is resting. Her mouth is wetter than his, seemingly soaked with saliva. He takes a drag from the blunt, his fingers retracting and stretching to scratch her head. She purrs at the motion, getting more eager around him. 

“Cmon princess,” Oscar murmurs, helping to slide his boxers down to mid thigh. He doesn’t wince or shiver when it meets the cold air as there’s barely any time for it to do so. The second he’s fully undressed, her warm mouth is engulfing his length. 

She bobs her head up and down, her lips tightening around his shaft and her cheeks hollowing for him. He’s pushing her head down without realising, the pressure is light but definitely suggestive. 

She doesn’t gag, just takes him further. He encourages her with a string of moans mindlessly escaping his mouth, mixed in with ‘ oh god, good girl’ and ‘that's perfect, princess, keep going’. He’ll smoke or eat edibles every weekend if this is how getting head feels like when he does.

Her nose presses into his crotch, her throat muscles working hard to accommodate the intrusion of him. He tries to touch her, help her get off while she’s giving him the blowjob he’s ever received but the way she’s lying with the rest of her body so far away, he settles for focusing the pleasure elsewhere.

He rubs his thumbs over her nipples, feeling them harden under his touch. She whimpers and whines, her moans choking into noises that sound like she’s crying. Her face is reddened and her hair is sweaty, her fringe plastered down to her forehead with sweat.

“Close, I’m close,” He twists some of her hair around his index, his middle finger tapping into the top of her hair. She looks up at him with glassy eyes and tensed eyebrows. 

“In me,” She gags around his length. She doesn’t need to ask twice. He fucks his hips up into her mouth, forcing a moan and a gag from the back of her throat as he releases into her. 

He feels spent, his body aching worse than it did back at home. 

She pulls off slowly, her lips oiled with spit and cum. Her neck muscles flicker with tension as she swallows it down. That’s new. She’s strictly been a ‘spitter’ to this very moment. He wipes a drop of cum off her lip and kisses her deep. He tastes himself in her mouth but there's hardly any recognition for it. He doesn’t care enough to be disgusted about it, nothing about kissing her is disgusting.

“You’re perfect,” He slips his tongue into her mouth, tugging her up to be laying on top of him. “Wanna make you feel good,” He moves his head, kissing down her neck.

Talia lets out a noise of confirmation, “please,” she whines burying her fingers against his scalp. From the awkward angle he’s at, he slips her pants down past her ass, her underwear at the same time. 

He rubs a finger over her wet hole, teasing it. She lets out a stifled whimper, burying her face further into Oscar’s chest. He slides the finger in slowly, watching the bits of her face that he can see intently. She’s shying away, forcing her face away from his view.

“You’re all shy now?” He teases, massaging one of her breasts with his palm. She doesn’t reply, just keens on him, desperate for more. He pushes his finger fully in, sliding it in and out. “Look at me, pretty,” He kisses her forehead, nudging the spot with his nose. 

She reluctantly looks up before snuggling into his neck. It’s a drastic difference from how she was only minutes earlier. He pushes a second finger in, knowing her all too well that she’s needy for it. She groans, scraping her teeth down along his shoulder.

He groans, throwing his head back. He knows what he’s doing, not needing to even look. He pushes in and out, deeper and just as controlled. Her walls tighten around him, her wetness slicking down over his palm and around his wrist. His thumb joins in, rubbing along her clit. 

“Oz,” it comes out all jagged and breathy. “Fuck- need to,” She can’t finish her sentences at this point, pushed so close to the edge. He gives her a whisper of allowance, his breath hot against her ear. 

“Come for me,” He instructs her, his thumb applying more pressure as he feels a gush of wetness spill down his occupied hand. She’s gasping, panting for air when it happens. His body is still trying to regain full senses from the weed, barely noticing how deep her nails are digging into his sides, leaving red crescent moons into his skin.

Once she’s come down from her high, Talia rolls onto the space next to him on the bed. They watch each other, laying on their sides as they share the joint. They puff smoke at each other, laughing over absolutely nothing. 

“You’re staying tonight?” Whether it's a statement or a question is unsure, just how she intended. Oscar cranes his head to where he can see the sun is peeking out and beginning to set. 

“Yeah, I’ll stay right here,” He hums as the two of them both nod off to a hazy, stoned induced sleep.

[madridfangirl]

Star crossed lovers (Jude Bellingham fic)

Chapter 7

(Series Link)

Jude * female reader. Mature Language in parts.

Synopsis: A chance encounter in a tiny Madrid cafe with the newest superstar of her fav club. The two couldn't be more different, yet both feel the pull toward the other. Would this girl be the one he finally falls for? Would she make him change his ways? Even though she resists him every step of the way, would he fight all odds (& her) to have her in his life? Or would life come in the way of these star-crossed lovers?

.............................................................................................

Wednesday morning started off on a foul note for Jude. The team landed after a red eye flight & below is what he saw at 6:30 am. 

Ananya: Heyy. Listen, I am so sorry but I can’t make it tonight. NY office just got back and we have tons more to do. All hands on deck. Will be MIA most of today & tmrw. Hope you put something on your bruises. Take care & see ya soon! 

He groaned in frustration. Yesterday had been horrible & he was really looking forward to seeing her tonight. It was his primary motivation to get through the day. But the universe seemed to be conspiring against him.

He stayed in a pissy mood for a bit but sanity prevailed some time later. 

Jude: Heyy, it’s fine. Work is work. Go kick some ass. Lemme know if you get done soon ya?

His message remained unseen till 10:30 pm. She hadn’t come online. He knew, since he had checked more than a few times.

He was about to crash when his phone buzzed.

Ananya: Still in office. Will be a long night. How was your day?

He perked up immediately & grabbed his phone. 

Jude: Talk for a few mins?

Ananya: In conference room with folks, can’t step out.

Deflated, he fell back on the bed, trying to find a comfortable spot. All he needed was some attention from her tonight. For her to fuss over him like she had done yesterday. But alas. 

Jude: Day was ok I guess. Debriefed on the game, lads were being extra nice which was irritating but had a good chat with Boss. How was yours?

Ananya: Hectic, but this deal is so cool it’s blowing my mind.

Jude smiled for the first time today. Her ambition & drive was relatable. Admirable. And so so attractive. 

Ananya: Ok gotta go now. Ciao.

And just like that, his smile faded. 

Jude: Ciao. Eat something. C ya soon!

He twisted & turned in bed a few times. Finally, exhaustion took over and he drifted off to sleep.

Next day was worse, if that was even possible.

He again woke up irritated. The UK tabloids were going to run a trashy story about him & some girl. His team had been contacted for comments & the decision was to not entertain them at all. The story could drop any time now - that was the heads-up he had gotten.

Great, just what he needed.

The message that he wanted to see was not there. Not a single peep from Ananya. He scrolled through the previous messages, re-reading some. And then he froze.

She was going to see the article too. 

Such gossip pieces on him were not uncommon but he mostly ignored them earlier. As did his team. 

But this time, it was different. Because of her. 

He had to get ahead of the situation.

Jude: Morning dove. I know you are busy. Quick heads up - you may see a tabloid piece today about my ‘girlfriend’. It’s all bull ok? I will explain when we talk. 

Burying himself with work seemed like the best solution today. He went extra hard in the gym, pushing himself more, & then some. Letting his irritation be sucked out through sweat and sore muscles.

He was extra feisty in training, didn’t joke around & was super competitive in duels, earning all the applause of the coaching staff and some jeers from his teammates.

Cama and Vini teased him about his new girlfriend who he was apparently smitten by - the article was splashed all over social media by now. He evaded them after engaging in some superficial locker room banter.

Still no reply from her, even though she had seen the first message. 

Jude: (Link) - This is what I was referring to. Like I said, it’s bull. How’s your day going?

When the messages were still unread after 2 hours, he started getting jittery. And did something he wouldn’t have done had he been thinking with a clear head.

He called her, knowing fully well she was dying at work today.

The number was unreachable. He tried again. Same message.

The jitters got stronger. Of the zillion things he was capable of doing to mess this up, this shouldn’t have been it.

It was one of those moments when the house looked emptier. Felt lonelier. He missed his home in Birmingham. He wished his mom were here with him.

She had called him earlier today to check on him, & could tell something was off in his voice. She didn’t push, knowing that he wanted to be left to his own devices.

Boy, he could do with her hug right now.

It was 8:30 pm. He had done everything he could for the day. There was nothing else to busy himself with. His friends from the team were all otherwise occupied tonight. He had no other real, normal friends in the city - ones he trusted/liked enough to hang out with. 

He didn’t wanna talk to his Birmingham friends either - didn’t wanna bring up the article or the match. Wanted to block those out. Jobe was busy with his training too. 

So he gulped his dinner while watching some random episodes of The Great British Bake Off. Something that used to be a family ritual back home.

Still no word from her. It was 10 pm.

It wasn’t fair. He hated feeling this restless. That’s why he stayed away from the complications of attachments - too much fucking drama that he absolutely didn’t need in his life right now. As if the pressures on him weren’t enough already.

His treacherous messed up self didn’t comply with his brain though.

Jude: Don’t overthink this. Talk to me once.

10:30 pm. Still nothing. 

He was about to get up from his couch & drag himself to bed, when he saw the blue ticks started coming on her chat. She hadn’t blocked him then?

He grabbed his phone & dialled her number, shoving his pride aside. She picked up in two rings.

‘Heyyyy Judeyyy.’

She slurred on the line. Jude was stunned. Was this for real? 

He channelled all his inner calmness - wanting to get the facts first.

‘Ananya - are you drunk?’

‘Siiii. We just downed half a bottle of tequila in three sixty minutes. No thirty-six. I meant thirty-six mins.’

He took a few deep breaths, as she giggled on the line. 

‘Tell me where you are. I am picking you up.’

‘I am in a moving car - how will you pick me up from a moving car?’

‘What the fuck do you mean you are in a car? Who are you with? And why the fuck are you drinking in a car?’

He lost his patience despite his best efforts.

‘Yikes why the screaming? Hurting my ears Jude. So rude. Heyyy, that rhymed.’

He nearly pulled out a few of his flawlessly trimmed hair in frustration. When he spoke next, he broke up each word like he was talking to a child.

‘One step at a time yeah? Send me your live location.’

She managed to do that after a few failed attempts. Relief flooded over him when he saw she wasn’t too far from her home & on the right route.

‘Good girl. Now, are you alone, or is someone with you?’

‘I am in a limo. A black limo. Like in the movies. Can you believe it?’

‘That’s great. Not what I asked though. Is someone with you, Ananya?’

‘Roma. But she’s passed out. Wait let me see again? Yup - passed out.’

‘Was it such a smart thing to drink so much that you pass out in the back of a car? When you are alone?’

‘Hey, she passed out. Not me. Pls - my capacity is legendary. Ask me the square root of 1576 & I'll tell you.’

He was amused but had to remind himself that he was still mad. 

‘Where were you today?’

Somehow, from her broken sentences, he gathered that the MD of their team lived on the outskirts of Madrid and there was a presentation of the final work at his mansion today. It was his limos that were dropping the team home. And the girls found the tequila in the car & just went for it after the grueling last 48 hours of work.

He also understood that her phone was on airplane mode most of the day. So she hadn’t seen his messages. Hadn’t seen the article either. 

Suddenly, there was some commotion on the line.

‘Roma is hitting me to talk to you. Putting you on speaker.’

‘Heyyy lover boyyyy - finally.’

This time he couldn’t stop himself from smiling.

‘Well hello to you too.’

‘You should know that you owe me. I convinced Ananya to go to the match. And, most importantly, I convinced her to GO WITH YOU after the match.’

‘Oh, I thought she came because of me. How sad.’

‘A little coz of you. But mostly it was me.’

‘I see. Then I definitely owe you one, Roma.’

‘Remember that when I ask for signed jerseys of the WHOLE TEAM. And Zidane. And of course our one true love Ronaldo.’

‘Ahh you too.’

‘Of course, we share a common love. But Ananya loves him more.’

‘Believe me, I know.’

The car swerved to their street soon after, stopping outside their apartment building.

‘Girls, focus now, ya? - watch your step, go inside, lock the door. Ananya - call me after. I am waiting.’

‘Sir yes sir.’

‘Byeee lover boyyyyy.’

Jude groaned as they hung up - staring at the phone for it to ring again. Praying that they don’t trip & fall on their assess. 

The wait was excruciating. He got to his room, changed into his sleeping shorts, paced around, still nothing. How fuckin irresponsible. Finally, after 13 long mins, she called.

‘What took you so long?’

‘Code wasn’t working. Had to call neighbors to buzz us in.’

‘Wasn’t working or you forgot it?’

‘Pretty sure it wasn’t working.’

He shook his head & let it go, understanding how it was a lost cause. 

Then he started blurting out some instructions to her like ‘re-check the door’, ‘grab some water’, ‘tell me you ate something before drinking’ etc.

Ananya followed them diligently, and the slurring reduced as the liqueur settled down. Still quite out of it, but he could hear the girl he knew in there.

Knowing she was safe now, his mood improved, and her antics even started looking cute. 

‘Facetime?’

It felt like forever since he had seen her last. Held her last. 

When he finally laid eyes on her, all his frustration & anxiety of last two days started to evaporate.

‘Hey you.’

She waved back happily, snuggled into her pillow, still in her work clothes. All dopey from the alcohol. 

‘If I fall asleep on you tonight, don’t take it personally. Haven’t slept in 2 days.’

‘But you kicked ass though didn’t ya? 

Her face brightened, despite the exhaustion.

‘Kinda did.’

‘Knew it. Proud of ya.’

He really was. She could tell. She was starting to learn how to read his bright, expressive, goofy eyes. Tonight, they were deep & sincere. And a little anxious.

‘How’s your mood now?’

20 minutes ago he would have had a very different answer. 

‘Now? All fine, dove.’

She was about to tease him, call him cheesy & sickly sweet but he doubled down with his big brown doe eyes.

‘Missed you.’

Again, the sincerity hit her square in her heart. Throwing her off guard. He seemed different tonight. Vulnerable. The trademark blend of cocky flair & casual nonchalance not at the forefront. 

‘Missed you too.’

She sighed, as her eyes fluttered shut. Not that she had had much time for any active thought the last few days. But seeing him like this just reminded her how much she was looking forward to meeting him last night.

As she gathered herself, he took in her surroundings. The baby pink pillows amused him the most; somehow he hadn’t associated that with her. 

‘Can’t believe this is how I get to see your bedroom. On FaceTime.’

He didn't realize he had said it out loud. She giggled at his groans, batting her eyelashes at him. The vixen.

‘Yeah? What else did you have in mind?’

Jude shifted uncomfortably in the sheets. 

‘Don’t tease. Not tonight.’

‘When’s a good time, then?’

‘When I am in touching distance of you, tease away, by all means.’

‘I am not stupid, Jude.’

‘Never thought you were, dove.’

Challenging each other was kind of becoming their thing. Neither liked backing down & both loved the dynamic.

But she was tired. Ready to drop dead anytime.

‘Gimme 2. Need to change out of these.’

‘Cool, I’ll stay here.’

She placed the phone on the bed. Then, on second thoughts, she covered the phone with her blanket. Suddenly, his screen was filled with baby pandas.

‘Seriously? I was facing the ceiling, what was I gonna see?’

‘Don’t trust you & your peripheral vision.’

Jude groaned audibly, facing the disorienting pandas, starting to seriously dislike the otherwise adorable creatures.

He could hear her bouncing around her room, humming something in a foreign tongue, heels clicking on the floor. Still quite buzzed, clearly.

And then, a loud thump.

‘What happened? You ok?’

‘Zipper got stuck in heels. Knocked over a carton. Am fine.’

Jude turned & buried his face in the pillow, trying very hard to drown out the thoughts of what she was doing right now.

He couldn’t afford to let himself wander, since they hadn’t yet discussed the matter at hand.

But it was hard, he nearly bit the pillow to rein himself in. 

That’s how she found him when she returned in her tank top. The same one she had on that night, when he kissed her. Great.

‘What’s with you?’

She eyed him curiously, and he recovered quickly, game face back on.

‘Need to talk about something.’

‘Go on.’

Something had shifted in the environment. In him. Putting her on the edge.

Ripping off the band-aid quickly seemed like the best strategy to him.

‘A tabloid piece came out today about me & a girl, saying she is my girlfriend and we have been dating for 2 months. Which is not true. Never dated her. No idea how they came up with this. Wanted to give you a heads-up. Sent you the link in chat earlier today.’

He got it all out quickly. Then zeroed in on her face to gauge her reaction.

Her face had hardened like she was preparing for something unpleasant. Expressions too neutral, too blank for his liking. Almost cold. A more agitated reaction would have been less unsettling.

Ananya had a feeling it was something like this. The shield was up. Plus she was too spent to give any kind of outward reaction. 

She replayed his words in her head, and read through the article, while he waited patiently.

Her insta feed was also full of this now. This was everywhere. She found the ID of the woman and clicked on her profile.

‘She is pretty.’

This was not the first thing he had expected to hear. But he had the good sense to know that no response was the best response. Both confirmation and denial would have been scoffed at. 

‘You say you didn’t date her, but you do know her, right? Didn’t hear you deny that.’

Her tone was matter-of-fact, business-like. As if she was slicing & dicing a work project.

‘Yes. I do.’

‘Elaborate.’

‘Met her through insta. Liked some pics of each other. Chatted on DM. Then, met in person. Once.’

‘When?’

‘Two months ago.’

So the article had gotten at least something right.

‘Slept with her?’

Both were surprised by her cutting to the chase like this. The alcohol had lowered her inhibitions significantly plus she wasn't in the mood to entertain any nonsense.

‘Yes.’

‘Why only once?’

‘Sorry?’

‘Why not again? She is pretty.’

‘Umm…she is not from here.’

That wasn’t a good answer, he knew it the moment he said it. It wasn’t the complete truth either. But the damage was done.

‘Any exchanges after?’

‘Not from me.’

The unsaid hung heavily in the air. She chose to not address it. 

Mindlessly, she kept scrolling through the girl’s profile and the details in the article, not wanting to say anything more immediately. Not wanting to look at him, while his eyes were glued to her face throughout. 

Eventually, he couldn’t handle the silence & spoke softly.

‘Remember, this was in the past. Nothing has happened since we met. Nothing will happen.’

The deep baritone was back, trying to lull her into a sense of security. 

She smiled wryly. If only it were that simple to believe. If only her mind was not filled with images of him frolicking at his home with this woman, as was so definitively stated in the article. 

He felt the chasm widening between them, pulling her further away.

Some core truths, albeit crude, needed to be said out loud now. 

‘Ananya - I’ve never lied to you. Never not answered anything you threw my way. Never painted a false picture of my lifestyle. We’ve discussed these encounters before. Yes this put a face to it & I get it’s hard. But that doesn’t change the fact that I was single, and both consenting adults always knew it was just sex, nothing more.’

Her eyes shot up at him at the last line, which he was expecting. But he stood his ground.

‘I can see you are judging me hard, and them too. Look…’

She cut him off sharply.

‘THEM? Who are they to me? Why should I judge women I don’t know anything about?’

‘And me?’

‘YOU? I am TRYING to understand you. Your DECISIONS. It is NOT EASY. Not something I ever imagined dealing with.’

‘I get it.’

He really did. She didn’t hear what he said though, still stuck on his previous words.

‘And THEM? Seriously how many are there? How many such GIRLFRIENDS should I be prepared for?’

He blanked & panicked simultaneously. How was he supposed to answer that? Thankfully, she intervened.

‘You know what? Scratch that. Don’t answer that, I don’t ever wanna know. I don’t care.’

She jerked her face away, trying to compose herself.

But he couldn’t stop staring at her. The usually calm, jovial features a picture of irritation & exhaustion right now. The need to hold her close & comfort her paralyzed him.

‘Can we do this in person? I can be there in 20-25 mins.’

‘NO.’

It was a firm, decisive no. Leaving no scope for discussion. He figured it was also her showing him he wasn’t just gonna get his way with her, that she wasn’t like the others. 

But he knew that already. That’s what had fascinated him so about her. She was unlike anyone he had been with before. How he wished she could see that too.

For the first time, the silence between them was not comfortable. Or comforting. 

The silence was interrupted by constant pings on her phone - two calls followed by a few messages. He saw her eyes go wide as she focused on the screen.

It was 12 am. Jude had a sinking feeling who it could be from. Last two days, he had really behaved himself. Despite knowing she would have spent every waking minute at work around that insufferable colleague of hers. Sticking to her like a leech. Pinging her at odd times. 

But, in a grand display of restraint, Jude hadn't uttered a word to her. It was her work after all. 

‘Jude I’m gonna need two mins.’

She muttered urgently, getting up from the bed.

‘I will stay online if that’s ok.’

‘Fine.’

She was already out the door, leaving the phone, leaving him behind.

Jude found himself facing the ceiling of her room again. Seriously, what the fuck just happened? Could this day get any more rotten?

She returned in a minute. He could hear her but not see her yet. Bile rose in his throat when he realised who she was talking to.

‘Hey Arjun, yes I found it. It’s with me now. Thank you so much for letting me know, this could have gone anywhere. You are a lifesaver.’

A pause for a few seconds, in which Jude plotted getting that cockroach permanently banned from the Bernabeu (Ananya had mentioned how big a fan he was), and then her voice again. Filled with genuine gratitude. Jude wanted to puke. 

‘Yeah all good, thanks again. Good night, see you tmrw.’

If her intent was to hurt Jude, then someone should hand her the Balon d’or immediately.

Ananya hung up, came back to the bed, and realized her phone was not on mute. She couldn’t find it in herself to care though, not right now.

‘All ok?’

Jude would have put monks to shame at the evenness he was able to muster in his voice.

‘Roma was drunk-texting on our work group. Some questionable stuff. Hv deleted the texts, will keep her phone tonight. Glad Arjun alerted me.’

And just like that, evenness went out the window. Replaced with sarcasm, laced with disdain.

‘How sweet of him, what a gentleman.’

Ananya turned the full force of her glare at Jude, which he met head on. Fire dancing in both their eyes. 

‘Would you GROW UP? Not everything is about you. And yes, he IS a gentleman. Your petulance will not change that.’

‘A FUCKIN TWAT is what he is. Always interrupting us. Always trying to cozy up to you. Even when he doesn’t have a shot. Classic small-dick energy. Quite fuckin LITERALLY in his case.’

Ananya could punch him through the screen. The insufferable, entitled, derisive prick that he was being. So full of himself. He needed to be put in his place. 

‘Yeah? Maybe I should verify that.’

The bodyblow landed as intended. Making him double over with pain.

Jude felt like someone had kicked him in the gut and in the nuts at the same time. His throat went dry and his hands turned clammy.

The numbness hitting his brain, then his body. The rage dissipated & he realised he didn’t have a leg to stand on, given how they had gotten here tonight.

Plus she would never do the thing she hates the most. She would never cheat, he was convinced.

His tone went down several notches, as did his attitude.

‘I know you are angry. I know you didn’t mean it.’

‘Oh no - I really do want..’

‘ANANYA PLEASE. Please. Slap me if you want to, smack me all that you like but NOT THIS. Please.’

The distress in his choked voice made her stop. Knocking the fight out of her. 

Her voice lost its edge, coming out in a whisper.

‘A hypothetical scenario broke you. Whereas….you…..you have actually..’

She didn’t finish the sentence. But the message was well understood.

‘I know it’s unfair. Even hypocritical of me. But I can’t help it. Can’t handle even the idea of you with anyone else. I want all of you. All for me. All the time. I’d go nuts otherwise I swear.’

This moment, she saw a young, sensitive, insecure boy in Jude, not the mature, articulate, sorted, in-control grown man known to the world. 

She found it strangely healing; a distinct warmth seeping into her skin and settling into the pit of her stomach. 

It was 12:30. Two emotionally charged hours they had spent on the phone. Dead tired from work. Yet, the idea of hanging up & calling it a night never occurred to either. 

Just then, her doorbell rang, making her jump.

‘Don’t be alarmed. Answer it.’

She eyed him curiously, checking his background again. He was still in his bed. 

‘What did you do now?’

‘Answer the door & you’ll see.’

Huffing, she got out of bed & walked out. Leaving him facing the ceiling again. Third time that night.

When she came back, he finally saw a ghost of a smile on her lips. And the light returned to her gorgeous soft eyes.

She was still gazing at the bouquet, stroking & smelling with contentment.

‘White Tulips for dove. Thought it’d be fitting.’

‘Jude.’

She sighed deeply, and buried her head in the flowers, letting the strong scent drown her senses.

This was never going to be easy, she knew that from the start. But every time she got wobbly, he steadied her. Every time doubts pulled her away, he clawed his way back to her. Lack of effort was definitely not something she could hold against him. 

Maybe he means what he says. Maybe it is different for him this time.

She turned to look at his smiling face, still leaning on the flowers.

‘How did you even find these in the middle of the night?’

‘To be fair I ordered them in the evening, when I thought you blocked me.’

‘Blocked you?’

He just shrugged in response. Slightly embarrassed but trying to not show it.

She laughed at the absurdity of it all, and he finally let go too, letting himself relax. The sound of his little giggles bounced on her ears, doing things to her.

‘You are such a loon.’

‘Wanna be your loon.’

She was starting to melt now and wanted to arrest the fall. So she switched gears.

‘Tell me - what was the plan if I had blocked you?’

There had to be a plan. He wasn’t the kind to take things lying down. 

‘Cheesecake & churros from our cafe tmrw morning. Along with a letter stating how a 20-year-old boy has the same psychological maturity as a 15-year-old girl. Therefore you should cut me some slack given women are far smarter biologically and also coz you are you. I’m not saying it, science is. Facts.’

‘Reallyyyyy? So a 20 yr old boy lacks psychological maturity, but somehow that’s not a problem when he fucks half the world with impunity? What does science say about that? No disadvantage there?’

Jude’s mouth opened and closed like a fish, still trying to process how his attempted humour had backfired in about 50,000 ways.

To his credit, he recovered fast.

‘See? A smart person would not have walked into that hole like I did. Exhibit A of how dumb I am. This just proves my point.’

‘How come the world fawns over your intelligence & maturity then?

‘They don’t know me. It’s a scam. Trent says I should still be in diapers. He said that to Jobe once & the little scoundrel agreed.'

He had done it again. Pacified her without her even realising. Yeah, she wasn’t buying the dumb act. This boy knew his power & used it unabashedly, to his full advantage.

It was 1 am. She yawned while checking the time & Jude suddenly got hit by pangs of guilt.

He would let her go soon, just needed to hear one thing.

‘We ok? 

He barely blinked till she responded.

‘I guess so.’

She shrugged, realising she wasn’t mad anymore.

He figured that’s the best he would get tonight. But soon, when they are together, he’ll make up for this mess.

It was time to let her get some well deserved rest.

Jude leaned in, eyes firmly locked into hers, and kissed his phone screen. He had never done that for another girl before. But this one, she made him do this twice in a span of 2 days.

She followed his movement closely, meeting his gaze. Somehow feeling his lips brush her skin. 

‘End my misery and meet me soon?’

She nodded, and he flashed her a trademark ear-to-ear Jude smile. Crinkling eyes n all. Making her heart leap in her chest. 

‘Now go, get some rest. And since you won’t let me come over, hug the flowers instead when you sleep tonight. You’ll feel me around.’

‘Bye Jude.’

‘Bye dove.’

Goes without saying, she did hug the flowers as she slept that night. 

...............................................................................................

This chapter was very different in my head when I posted the previous one. But then, stuff happened the last few days & I felt like writing about it.

As always, would love to hear your thoughts / comments / feedback. Hope you are liking the story & these two, lots more to come :)

[d0vesgr4veyard]

Random Jinx Oneshot

Uhm yeah, Im shit at writing so.... Beware. This is a re-uplood now that I've prooferead it cuz i hated the other one 💜

If i re-read this later and find a mistake girl THIS IS NEVER. GETTING POSTED AGAIN 😭😭😭

MODERN AU (Both are college roommates, Fem!Reader)

Reader is a bit sassy...

The apartment was still. The soft hum of the fridge, the slight flicker of the hallway light. Despite the comfort of your bed you still felt cold... and lonely. So without second thought you pick up your teddy and unplug your phone. Making your way to the room next to you.

Jinx’s room was surprisingly quiet as she settled down, her colored fairy lights lighting the room dimly. Purple, blue, and pink consuming the room. Her room was slightly messy, rubbish strewn across the floor with scraps of her engineering coursework tossed around the room. Suddenly, the slight creak of the door opening caught her attention. Her eyes meeting yours, peering around the door. She pauses, staring at you with confusion spreading across her face. You then swing the door open, sauntering in like you own the place.

“What’re-.. What are you doi-...”

You plop down onto the bed. You’re well-worn teddy slightly smacking against her arm.

“Wha-.. Why are you in here?” Jinx queries

You deadpan at Jinx, as if she asked a stupid question. You turn away from her and open your phone, your teddy snuggled tight against your chest.

“I’m sleeping here.” You eventually answer. She relaxes a bit, laying back down.

“Do you not have your own room?” She pointed out, her protest not really having any heat behind it. You shrug, continuing to scroll through a few more tiktoks. Jinx scoffs at your attitude, her mouth opening and closing a few times. An attempt to come up with some quip to hit back with. “I- uhh- why do you have a teddy?”

“Because I like him.” You answered, holding up the teddy like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Jinx’s face dropping into a scowl at the sight of it. “He also, doesn't ask dumb questions”

“Oi! Cool it with the sass, doll” Jinx rolls her eyes, leaning back against her bed. Getting comfortable again. She turns to you, admiring you a bit. Somehow, you always managed to be there for her.. even when you didnt need to be. Her expression softens, a small smile forming on her face. Growing to enjoy your sudden presence, while everythings calm.

“Need my charger.” You spoke suddenly, tearing through the quiet, hopping off the bed and padding off back to your room. 

“Gods… what’re you doing now?..” She squeaked, her voice trembling slightly.

Jinx watched you in disbelief as you returned, not only with a charger, but with; a throw blanket, a water bottle, and some snacks. Dropping your water bottle and snack onto Jinx’s bedside table. Reclaiming your spot on the bed, you plugged your phone in, slightly pushing back against Jinx’s side as you snuggled under the blanket.

“This isn’t a hotel,” Jinx grumbled

“Obviously, hotels aren’t this messy,” You quipped. Tucking your teddy under your chin, sighing in comfort.

Jinx settled back into her spot, trying her best to ignore you but every movement or squeak you made her attention was immediately pulled. She opened her mouth to say something until you turned over looking at her. Her jaw snapped shut. You looked so content,  She sighed.looking up at her with your eyes half-lidded.

“You’re so distracting’” Jinx stated

“Not my fault.”  You shot back

“You’re in my room!” You stuck your tongue out at her playfully, scrunching up your face. Then swinging your leg over her stomach, straddling her. You lean down, trailing your hands up her sides, your face finding comfort in the crook of her neck. Taking in her scent, you smile against her skin. Jinx’s face rapidly heated up as she nervously laughed.

“Getting comfy”

Jinx rolled her eyes playfully. “You're lucky i like you, doll”

She wrapped her arms freely around you, holding onto your body. She stilled, feeling you breathe against her. The rise and fall of your chest calming her. She leaned down, nuzzling her nose into your hair, as her hold on you tightened. You were gentle with her. You stuck by her, your loyalty making her weak for you, even when comes to you storming into her room acting like a primadonna. A smile tugging at her mouth.

“Love you too, J”

[lawliet-ryuzaki-ryuga]

The Hunt

Shouma Toriashi X reader ( chapter 1)

Word count: 1163

TW: not really just so strong language…

Summary: life as we know it can change in an instant, and so do feelings and the people you meet.

MASTERLIST

chapter 2

A/N: HEY GUYS this is just a small project I wanted to start! I just got done reading the manga so I’m going to re-read it and hopefully I can better depict the characters better!! I HOPE YOU ENJOY ( p.s. DONT WORRY IM GOING TO HOP BACK ONTO MY OLD STORIES OF L AND LEVI! )

It was another day of school and homework on homework that’s been passed out.. I never understood why they bombard us like we don’t have other classes to work on.i look over to see Yoshino already walking towards my desk, with that I sit up straight ready to hear what she has to say .

“ hey Y/N do you want to come over? Shouma and I are going to study together?” Yoshino asks while putting both her palms flat against my desk and looks down at me.

“ oh yeah sure..” I nod in agreement. Behind me is shouma but he’s usually in his own world .

“Great, well I guess this is where we part ways, we’ll meet at the school entrance after this period.” With a firm nod Yoshino walks away and out of the once shared classroom we had. I stare at the class room door watch as students walk out together all looking the same as the other. Ever since I was younger I saw majority of everyone the same. Bland and simple, each face the same as the last.

At first glance people might look at us and think what an Odd group, then again we are really only each others friends. But it was for the first time that I saw people. I saw character in both Yoshino and Shouma. Deep in thought I shake out of it, and With that I get up and gather my things getting ready for the next class, physical education.

Oh how I dreaded that class, simply because it’s where both shouma and I lose our cool.

“ Hey” you kick Shouma’s chair to grab his attention. “ get up before we miss our last class.” With a look that could kill Shouma glared at me but gets up to follow.

I finally changed into the PE outfit but as always the bottoms are just too short. “ are you kidding Me I literally got then in a bigger size to hopefully be longer!! CURSE YOU ABNORMALLY LONG LEGS!”

You and Yoshino are one of the tallest girls in your class, in the whole school in fact and everything you’ve come to wear has always been an issue with length. With a sigh I muster up the courage to leave the changing room, and to my disappointment none other than Toriashi Shouma is waiting outside the female dressing room.

“Couldn’t find any shorter shorts Y/N?”

“Shut up Toriashi, these are the longest pair I have.” I huff walking away from him.

Today was a game of volleyball, not my favorite but one that i can stand. That is until I found out Shouma is on my team! Ugh I swear if I lose because of him, he’s dead meat.

“ better not fuck this up Shouma.”

“ Don’t worry, maybe if you had a bigger ass I’d be distracted.”

How dare he… that’s it he’s dead. I try to ignore his comment and walk to my center position like the team agreed on, waiting for the game to start.

During the whole game I could feel someone’s eyes on me, analyzing every movement. I should be used to it, considering being friends with Yoshino, she has hundreds of eyes watching her every move anytime we go out in public. But this gaze is different .. much different.

As the game continues on, And like always Shouma and I are fighting for dominance on our side of the court.

“ you idiot, I said it was mine! Why did you jump forward!”

“ because it was clearly in my side Y/N”

“ no it was not Shouma and you know it! You did it on purpose, there was no reason for you to be that close to my back!”

Mid game while we were taking the 3 min break trying to switch sides of the court, Shouma comes up wrapping something around my hips.

“ what are you doing?” I look down at what’s around my hips and up to the person who’s hands are tying The Jacket into a knot.

“ just keep it on”

“ Shouma you’re supposed to keep your arms covered” I whisper yell at him, I swear he never used his brain.

“Just keep it on.” He mumbles before walking away, with a sigh I just brush it off and try to focus on the game. Shouma has always been so annoying like my brother. Always trying to boss me around and oh does it make my blood boil. What makes me more upset is i always try my best to make sure he’s always covered at all times and no tattoos peak through, but he just doesn’t care.

The game finally ends and I walk up to him ready to hand him his jacket back.

“ here take it ba—.”

“ I said keep it on Y/A.”

“ the game is over, I’m giving it back to you now.”

“ No, go change, once you are changed you can give it back.” He grabs the sleeves of the jacket and ties it back firmly around my hips. I’ll be damned if he thinks I’m just going to listen to him.

“ I said take your damn jacket bastard!” I untie the jacket and chunk it at him and walk away back into the changing room. This man infuriates me, it’s not like I wasn’t Thankful but I will not be bossed around, especially by him! Who does he think he is , my father?

I quickly change out of my outfit and back to my regular uniform once I’m showered and clean. With that I grab my bag and belongings and walk out the changing room, that is until I see what looks like a fight about to happen.

“ Keep your eyes and comments to yourself.” Shouma is holding one of our male classmates against a wall. I can only imagine why this is happening.

“ Shouma that’s enough, let's go.” I grab his other hand that was free and pull him away from the poor boy. The thing about Shouma, he’s well behaved for the most part, but there are times where he’s a ticking time bomb.

“ This is why I tell you to cover up your tattoos, if you don’t want people looking Listen to me.”

“ and the next time I tell you to keep the jacket ,listen to me. There won’t be a next time actually, next time you’re wearing my jogging pants.” He fights back with an attitude in his tone.

“ Like hell I am, they are too big on me.”

“ i don’t care.”

“ I’m not going to wear them, focus on covering your tattoos and stop focusing on me.” I bite back with the same attitude.

“ and rather they focus on my tattoos and not on your whole legs!”

“ Hey, what’s going on guys? You guys can be heard miles away.” Yashino walks up to where I and Shouma are standing .

“ He’s blaming me that my shorts are too short. That’s what he’s complaining about Yashino .”

“ Excuse me ? Shouma do you think we want to be this tall where nothing fits!” Yoshino jumps into the argument.

“ I’m not blaming anyone, both you and Y/N need to just wear pants instead during physical education.” Shouma closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance.

“ you don’t tell us what to do!” Both Yoshino and I yell in unison.

“ you know what… I don’t give a fuck , lets just go home for fuck sakes.” Shouma pushed through, leading the way back to both him and Yoshino’s place.

[danielmolloyshole]

@ahubofreadersandmagicians:

Why would Daniel hate Marius? He’s already read the “forced prostitution” and “Marius de Romanus” folders from the Talamasca’s Armand file, we’ve seen them. His only response was to shame Armand for talking abt the Arun/Amadeo days and imply he was lying. Even knowing Armand was telling the truth. Daniel’s bad w/abuse victims generally and hates Armand. Sadly, I think he’ll be ok with Marius.

This got stupid long and also needs to broken into parts to try to minimize how all over the place I am so let's gooo. Friendly disclaimer that this is my opinion but I am literally trained in media analysis like this so I promise I am coming from a place of knowledge. I'm gonna start with my interpretation of Daniel's character and go from there.

RE; Daniel is bad with abuse victims

I'm assuming you are saying this because of how Daniel talks to Luis about his abuse. The way Daniel approaches this topic is, frankly, awful. Daniel is not good at it. However, he is not supportive of it. He calls Lestat out on how badly he was treating Luis, the racial dynamic (again, said in a really bad way but later we do see Lestat minimizing Luis's feelings about how he is treated as a black man so he wasn't wrong). I also think about the rent boy line, which to me was more directed as a snide remark at Luis and his assumption of what their relationship is. Not saying it wasn't also supposed to be a jab at Fake Rashid (by this point he is suspicious and annoyed and staring all the time and in general does not know what to make of him, which Daniel doesn't like), but Daniel was in active conversation with Luis and not Fake Rashid. Daniel is mean, this is not in contention. He is not a good person. But he does not ignore or get down with abuse and instead calls it out into the room, both explicitly and implied.

RE; Daniel's Past & Hating Armand

Now, what informs the fact that Daniel is such a bitch, especially when he is chasing the high of bringing out the truth? Working under the assumption of my previous post, Devil's Minion has happened. The evidence of such is, in my opinion, scattered throughout both seasons and would be a whole other post to detail. This, in my opinion, is supported by comments made by the actors and show runners that imply they have purposefully planted seeds. All I have to work with in terms of analysis right now is the book and these seeds and my last post stated that we are treating the Devil's Minion chapter as canon up until Daniel's turning, at which point Armand would have erased his memories. This implies that from 1973 until 1985, the ages of 20 and 35, Daniel's memories are incomplete. Imagine your most developmental years as an adult are now so full of holes that you wrote a memoir about how inconsistent your memory is. Your first love, your first heartbreak, the first time you debased yourself for someone's love, the first time you really fucked up with someone, countless mistakes now altered. Any self-actualization that would have made Daniel a better person is now incomplete. This includes the memory of Daniel fucking a girl with a bag on her head. It is a shameful memory, that's why Armand brings it out, but as a twenty year-old shitty kid from Modesto, Daniel might not have fully conceptualized how ashamed he is of it until it is used as weapon against him. Assuming the memories begin to return next season, either in partial or in full, this would mean that Daniel would suddenly have a much fuller context of his trauma and why he does what he does. Eric Bogosian mentioned in an interview that both he and Daniel have forgotten trauma and I do not believe San Francisco is the end of that trauma. A relationship as volatile as Armand and Daniel's, influenced by drugs and blood and danger, would hold just as much trauma if not more than the six days spent in that apartment. Bogosian went on to say that those traumas influence how someone acts and interacts without even being aware of it. I believe a lot of the development we're gonna see in Daniel is him reconciling the mean, tear-it-all-down journalist with the man he was at the height of his affair with Armand. We've already seen heightened emotion from his Paris memory (another tangent but I do not believe Alice is Armand but rather that this specific memory was altered. Daniel cares a lot less about the memory of Alice telling him she's pregnant so the inconsistency is odd).  Daniel is going to need character development moving forward. Does this mean he's going to stop being an asshole? No. He's still an asshole. I just think he'll be a different kind of asshole.

RE; Daniel Shaming Armand

I don't interpret that Arun/Amadeo line as shaming him, exactly. Asking where the lies start, implying the Arun dynamic was something of a sham (master when it's hot and convenient, etc), yeah. He's in the throes of bringing down the castle of lies, he's gotten his hit, he's basically high on exposing the truth. To me, especially given how he looks at Armand while he's on the floor, I don't think Daniel hates Armand. In book canon, it's said that he could only feel ravening desire and it is my opinion that that remains true. Daniel was gloating until the high wore off and then he was at the very least incredibly shook and definitely not making a move to rub it in Armand's face that he won.

RE; Daniel hating Marius

The show has set Marius up to be a pedophilic groomer. I don't even know if grooming was a widely-used term in the seventies but they dropped it in there and modern sensibilities make that very purposeful writing. Daniel, as stated before, does call out abusive behavior. Is he doing it in a way that reduces harm? Fuck no. Is he hurting everyone in the way he does it? Absolutely. But he has shown no evidence of being supportive of abusers and Marius has been set up explicitly as an abuser.

RE; Conclusion

Daniel Molloy is not a good person but he is not an abuser and there is no evidence that suggests he would love Marius or be in any way supportive of his actions. This is true in particular with Armand, since it is now well-established that they will have a romantic relationship in the future.

[stopper-my-heart]

Nick Nelson's Comphet Hair Sweep

Hear me out. You know this gesture?

This is Nick Nelson's Comphet Hair Sweep™️.

I'll be sidestepping the trees today in favour of the forest (i.e., skipping over the other layers that any single instance of this gesture may involve in favour of the theme that unifies them: comphet).

'Comphet' = compulsory heterosexuality

For the purposes of this post, I mean that Nick uses his 'hair sweep' gesture when he's feeling self-conscious about his sexuality and is feeling compelled – from somewhere internal, external or both – to be or appear heterosexual.

Now then! Let's look at every single instance where Nick does his Comphet Hair Sweep (and a couple of times he doesn't, to support the point).

Season 1

Episode 1: Charlie's existence and awesomeness are causing a lot of confusion for Nick (a.k.a. Nick is trying to bury his sexuality head in the sand). In this episode, Nick's Hair Sweeps are all or almost all about him trying to reassure himself of or reassert for himself his heterosexuality.

1. This is one of Nick and Charlie's early "hi"s, seen during their "hi" montage. Nick: “Hi, I don't find you cute, everything's Normal.”

2. During lunch, Nick is playing rugby with the lads and Charlie is distracted by watching him. 'Coincidentally', Nick does his Hair Sweep right after Charlie looks over. Or maybe he's just feeling like he needs to be straight lad/bro-y with his rugby mates. Either way, there doesn't seem to be any hair in Nick's face that actually needs pushing out of the way.

3. Nick hears Coach Singh praise Charlie's running and looks over to watch. Nick is impressed and not staring at all.

4. Charlie tackles Nick for the first time. This physical contact is perhaps more Something than either of them was expecting.

5. Nick tackles Charlie. We don't see Nick's face while he does the Hair Sweep but all of his other faces surrounding this moment suggest surprise, enjoyment and confusion that are not solely related to Charlie's improvement at rugby. (Hello, leaves. Thanks for the reinforcement.)

-----------------

Episode 2: For the majority of this episode, we see Nick spending time alone with Charlie. He seems to be setting aside any confusion in favour of having carefree fun with Charlie earlier on and then later explores his sexuality a bit rather than avoiding it or pushing it down. As a result, we have only one Comphet Hair Sweep in this episode, during the transition between Nick's approaches.

1. Charlie helps Nick play the drums. Nick, steeling himself a very hetero-normal amount: “This is fine. Charlie can be pressed against me from shoulder to knee and I'll feel nothing.” (Narrator: He did not, in fact, feel nothing.)

This marks a shift where, from here on out, every single Comphet Hair Sweep is because of someone else's expectations of Nick rather than his expectations of himself. He can no longer ignore or avoid or refuse to recognise that he's into Charlie.

Note that Nick googles “am i gay?” at the end of this episode.

-----------------

Episode 3: This episode is another one where Nick spends a lot of time seeking out and spending time with Charlie, as well as defying his mates' expectations. As a result, we again have only one Comphet Hair Sweep.

1. Harry and Sai are discussing girls Nick might be able to get with at Harry's birthday party. Nick is feeling compelled to seem straight for the lads, but he also wants to shut down this discussion (his actual crush is right there and might get the wrong impression!).

-----------------

Episode 4: Unfortunately for Nick, in this episode he has to be around other people, with whom he hides himself, more often again.

1. Imogen immediately notices that Nick looks different (i.e., happier and more himself) after he and Charlie get together. Obviously Nick needs to re-place his hair after Imogen ruffles it, but he also wants to hide that the change is related to something decidedly not-hetero.

2. After Harry chucks a rugby ball at Tao, and Nick comes to check on Tao and collect the ball, Tao takes out his frustration and anger by throwing it back at Nick. If Nick wasn't already aware of Tao's feelings about the rugby lads, from this interaction alone it's clear to him that Tao is assuming that he's like Harry because he's part of that group, just another one of the (straight) laddish lads.

3. Before the St John's rugby match, Charlie jogs over to meet his friends who have come to cheer him on. Charlie has just reassured Nick that he won't say anything about their relationship to his friends, but Nick is still nervous and feeling a need to appear straight, especially with his own friends and the rugby lads all around.

4. Darcy nevertheless picks up on something romantic between Nick and Charlie and asks Charlie about it. When Charlie replies, "We're friends" and Darcy pokes at it a bit more, we can see Nick (who's been eavesdropping) in the background doing his Comphet Hair Sweep to compensate.

5. After Charlie is tackled during the rugby match for the first time, Nick calls out to him (which he doesn't do for any other player). We then see Nick come into frame in the background and do a Comphet Hair Sweep before the camera cuts away.

-----------------

Episode 5: Nick makes big strides towards pulling away from others' expectations of him in this episode. This is the beginning of the end of the Comphet Hair Sweep.

1. Harry throws something at Tao and Charlie, Tao retaliates with a shove and an insult, and Nick tells Harry off to stop the confrontation. However, Harry then turns on Nick, saying, "Aw, are you gay for them?", eliciting laughter from the rest of the lads. This homophobia hits close to home for Nick; he loses his nerve, stops sticking up for Tao and Charlie and does his Hair Sweep, uncomfortable but hiding behind appearing straight once again.

2. Nick invites Imogen to the park to tell her that he's not romantically interested in her. After doing so, Nick begins to do a Comphet Hair Sweep but abandons the gesture, changing it to just slightly pushing his hair to the side. This reflects Nick's decision to then be as open and honest with Imogen as he feels ready for at that moment, offering a confession of not “fitting” with their friend group.

2.5. Note that at the end of Nick's talk with Imogen, there's much more hair in Nick's face that he does not attempt to Sweep aside.

3. Unfortunately, Nick hasn't escaped Harry's grasp fully yet. He seems frustrated at letting himself continue to be confined by the group's hetero expectations but still chooses to conform, for now, though possibly deciding after this Hair Sweep that he needs to break free. (Cue animated lovebirds taking flight.)

-----------------

Episode 6: This episode marks the end of the Comphet Hair Sweep as Nick begins to come out to people. Tara has also just publicly come out and is struggling with the fallout from that.

1. Demeera on Reddit posited that the locking music practice room is a metaphor for ‘the closet’. If we take that view, it seems especially telling that Nick does his Hair Sweep right after telling Charlie that he may be bisexual and when looking towards ‘the closet’ where Tara and Darcy are currently trapped.

2. Note that it's Nick who then shoves open the door to ‘the closet’, setting Tara and Darcy free, and perhaps himself as well. We see Nick attempt a Hair Sweep but with the ‘wrong’ hand, doing it a moment later with the other hand. So he does the gesture twice, with both hands...‘bi’ times with ‘bi’ hands, if you will. (And then he sets off on the LGBT corridor run.)

3. This is the final Comphet Hair Sweep, and, notably, it's out of frame. Nick does it when Tao looks at him -- Tao, who is the last of their friend group not to know about the nature of his and Charlie's relationship, and who Nick knows adamantly believes that he's straight.

-----------------

Season 2

After S1E6, Nick does not ever do the Comphet Hair Sweep gesture again. The only remotely similar gesture he does is in season 2 when he sweeps his hair back after his shower in episode 2. He uses one hand to pull his hair back along both sides of his part. This is a Confidently Bisexual Hair Sweep if I've ever seen one.

-----------------

Note that this post is a mixture of genuine and tongue-in-cheek. I don't plan on specifying further; I'll leave that space for you to develop your own views with less influence from mine.

Thanks for taking the time to read through and consider this!

Thank you, too, to @bairdthereader for contributing "sweep" as the term for the motion.

[mykoreanlove]

oopsie daisy 🌼

The annoying sound of Felix’ alarm was disturbing the silence of the late afternoon. With eyes closed he searched for his phone and shut it off. A deep groan escaped his lips, followed by a sharp pain in his head.

“Why did I drink that much”, he scolded himself.

Yesterday’s party got out of hand quickly – what should have been an intimate gathering with some close friends at Changbin’s turned into a massive bash. Felix tried to remember last night’s events, but his mind went blank for the most part. Anxiety formed in his stomach as he did not like to feel helpless, out of control.

He heard a knock on his door and flinched in pain.

“Can I come in?”

It was Chan.

“Yeah, sure”, Felix answered in a deep, raspy voice.  

His friend opened the door with a big glass of water and headache pills in hand, already knowing that Felix would need them.

“Here”, he gave them to his younger friend.

Felix had trouble sitting up as his head felt dizzy and his stomach seemed nauseous. He gathered his remaining strength and gulped down the water, hoping to feel better quickly.

“Do you have any memories of last night?”, Chan asked cautiously.

Instantly, the anxiety in his stomach grew bigger. Felix shook his head, too nervous to ask what he had done.

“Do you wanna know?”, Chan offered politely.

Felix took a deep sigh, trying to calm his nerves. “I don’t know if I want to?”

“Oh, trust me. You do want to know.”, Chan chuckled amused.

“Okay”, Felix sighed in defeat and curled into a ball while hugging his plushie. “Tell me what happened last night.”

“…yeah, and then you vanished into the kitchen and played UNO for hours. Changbin told me that you downed a shot each time you lost, so apparently you drank a lot. And after that you walked around whispering “Wakey wakey” into the girls’ ears, going as low as you can. I saw you run around laughing manically and trying to escape many girls that night. Oh, and after your little striptease dance break you spilled your drink all over your chest and ran into the bathroom.”, Chan re-collected.

Felix was embarrassed but so far, he didn’t do anything horrendous.

“And after that you came running to me, all nervous and agitated and you muttered something about kissing y/n.”

Felix shot up alarmed, instantly regretting it though as his head was still pounding heavily.

“I did what??”

“Yeah”, Chan confirmed in a reserved manner.

“I kissed y/n? Lee Know’s girl y/n???”

Panic arose in his body as he could not believe it.

Did I really do that? Why? What was I thinking?

“Don’t you remember anything at all?”

Felix shook his head ashamed.

“No, not a single thing.”

Chan sighed. “Well, do you like her?”

Felix’ eyes widened in surprise.

Like her? Do I like y/n? Is this what this is?

“I mean I like her as a friend. As a person. But she is Lee Know’s girlfriend, and I never saw her another way. Shit, Chan, I fucked up. How do I tell him?”

Felix already envisioned the worst. It was bad enough that he had kissed his friend’s girlfriend, but it was even worse since it was Lee Know. The unforgiving, dangerous menace Lee Know.

“I don’t think you have to worry about that, Lix.”

Felix got up, entirely ignoring the condition of his body.

“What? Does he already know? Did he see us?”

Felix was on the verge of breaking down – he’d either cry or vomit or do both, his nerves were getting the best of him.

“Nah, but you kind of kissed him, too.”

“What????” Felix' deep voice turned into a high-pitched one, each shock making it even more shrill.

Chan laughed amused.

“Yeah, that was kind of the highlight of last night. You came up to me and explained that you kissed y/n and you felt so bad about it and didn’t want Lee Know to be mad at you, so you walked up to him and kissed him as well. In a room full of people might I add.”

Felix clasped his hands over his head, bewildered and confused.

“You’re fucking with me, right? Is that some cruel joke? Please tell me Seungmin is standing behind the curtains and filming this. Please, Chan.”

Chan ruffled through Felix’ blonde hair and flashed him a warm smile.

“It’s real, Lix. Why don’t you check your phone if you don’t believe me?”

Chan got up and left, leaving Felix alone with his thoughts.

My phone..

Felix searched his bed, shuffling aside pillows and plushies until he finally found his phone and turned it on again. He received a lot of messages after leaving the party but there were only two that caught his attention.

What the fuck did I do?

[jilyandbambi]

So I don't necessarily think Daniel was malicious towards his daughters, but I do think he has said explicitly on the show that neither of his daughters are speaking to him currently. That suggests total estrangement. Beyond that, Daniel was a junkie. He may have wanted to be a good father, but drugs mess that up pretty hard and pretty fast.

Respectfully, Anon, you're missing my point.

I'm not trying to negate what the show has alluded to re: Daniel's backstory and relationship with his family, what I'm saying is that, with so little to go on wrt Daniel's backstory and given that it is still totally plausible (to the point of being quite common, if you can believe it) for one to have a great deal of love for a parent with a history of substance abuse, neglect, or one you've decided to go no-contact with, the accepted Daniel's Kids Hate Him fanon feels flat and lacks appropriate nuance (and imagination!!! which is more annoying to me, personally) for the fandom of The Complicated Relationships Show.

I know children (even grandchildren) of addicts whose parents still managed to create good memories with them even as they battled addiction. Are these relationships dysfunctional? Yeah. Were these good parents? Jury's out. But imperfect or even bad parenting doesn't mean it was all bad, all the time.

On the subject of Daniel's estrangement from his daughters, the fandom bases this on one throwaway line Daniel says during a highly charged rant at Louis, who has been baiting him off and on for days. What does Daniel say right before "My daughters don't even talk to me?" Some snarky remark about legacies being for execs and assholes in loafers (paraphrasing). I got news for you, peeps, two-time Pulizer winners who teach Masterclass seminars and who go through the trouble of publishing an autobiography/memoir care very much about their legacy, despite what they might say in the heat of the moment.

BUT, even if one wants to interpret this one throwaway line literally and run with the notion that both of Daniel's daughters have gone no-contact with him, the show's canon still leaves the "when's" and "why's" of this estrangement wide open.

Who's to say this has always been the case? What if it's recent?

Terminal illness affects families in different ways; what if one daughter couldn't deal with the news and is coping by ignoring him, and the other cut contact bc she doesn't agree with Daniel's decision to continue living independently instead of moving in with her or into an assisted living facility? What if the news of Daniel's diagnosis caused his kids to start smothering him as though he was already in hospice until one day he snapped, said some messed up things, and demanded they give him space, so they're giving it to him (albeit not the way he wanted it).

What if it has nothing to do with the Parkinson's? What if one kid is a semi-homeless addict globetrotting around the world just like Daniel did back in the day (if we assume DM chase happend) and is just so caught up in doing her own thing she doesn't even think to call anyone in the family, much less Daniel? What if the other kid has a partner who doesn't like Daniel and Alice (if she's real) and since marrying this asshole has distanced herself from her family?

What if--as I said in my original post--they're simply really fucking busy being grown and having their own lives and don't have time to reply to Daniel's 90 million daily texts, and "My daughters won't even talk to me" is just Daniel being a surly, dramatic old man who's had it with the depressed vampire he's ranting at, and also wants his girls to be faster texters?

Or, Daniel was a druggie fuckup who was too strung out to ever meaningfully bond with his daughters who, now grown, actively despise him. <- Sure. The popular theory works, too, obviously but there's no reason this has to be THE go-to fanon explanation since

We!! Don't!!! Know!!!! anything concrete about Daniel's past aside from his Pulitzers and drug use. So why not get creative and have fun with the blank canvas while we can?