#I feel like I'm going to be trapped alone forever again

[aakeysmash]

you manage to make college!sukuna take yuuji trick or treating

college!sukuna masterlist

You barely put your foot inside the apartment when you hear sniffling coming from the kitchen.

“Please ‘Kuna, I can’t go alone,” Yuuji mumbles, moving a single piece of spaghetti around his plate.

Sukuna huffs, standing up from the table. "Can't you just go with that kid you invited over the other day? Meg... Meg something?"

"No! I already told you I can't, like 3 times!" Yuuji starts, getting progressively more frustrated.

"Don't throw a fucking tantrum, Yuuji, you know I hate that shit," the older grits out, cleaning his plate.

"But-"

"Hello...?" you say, peeking inside. Two sets of eyes fix on you, and silence engulfs the three of you for what feels like the longest three seconds ever. "Y'all are weird," you whisper, getting inside and going to the fridge. Yuuji waves at you, trying to be polite even if you can see he's on the brink of tears, before the two brothers in the room with you resume their conversation.

"Brat, I'm not coming. I have assignments," Sukuna sighs. He doesn't turn around, he knows Yuuji is pouting and he might or might not have lied. Well, not completely: he does have to turn in two different projects for his economics class, but he's almost finished. He did say he would take a double shift the night Yuuji is asking him about though. They're tight on money, but it's not like he wants to admit that to his little brother. Is this what guilt feels like?

The little pink haired boy sniffles, then nods. "It's okay," he slurs out, cleaning after himself in silence. For the next 5 minutes, you can hear a pin drop from how silent it is. Sukuna keeps on washing dishes, Yuuji keeps on cleaning the table.

You're still standing by the fridge, trying to mind your own business, but seeing the whole scene makes the hair on your nape stand up. The two siblings would have the same stoic and unmoving face if it wasn't for Yuuji's lip trembling imperceptibly from time to time.

"I'm going to my room. Sorry for having bothered you, 'Kuna," the little one says, opening the door to the kitchen softly, and closing it even softer. Sukuna inhales strongly, putting his hands on the counter in front of him and closing his eyes. You feel like if you breathe harder than what a mosquito does, he'll crash out.

He pats his pockets repeatedly, searching for something. He takes out a pack of cigarettes and turns around to reach for the lighter you keep in the first drawer, when your voice startles him. Seeing him startled startles you too. He's never startled. What is going on?

"I thought you quit."

"Mind your own fucking business," he snarls, snatching open the drawer.

"What's got your panties in a twist?" you reply, matching his rudeness.

"Can you shut the fuck up? Damn," he continues, glaring at you, taking one big drag of the pressed tobacco between his fingers.

"No, I'd like to eat a normal dinner with both of you today, so are you going to tell me what is going on or do I have to ask your crying nine year old little brother?" you hiss out, snatching the cigarette he just lit and tossing it in the sink, still wet from when he washed his dishes, effectively turning it off.

He's on you in a second. "Don't piss me off, woman," he says, trapping you between the sink and his body. He's towering over you, and he has to bend down to look at you properly. "Stay out of it," he says, menacingly. You gulp, but you're not finished. And most importantly, you know him. You've been living together for forever, or maybe it feels like it because you're always together, either for Yuuji or because... wait, why are you always together?

"I'll stop when I feel like it, Sukuna," you say, getting closer to his face. Your voice is clear, your nose an inch from his own. You look into each other's eyes so intensely that if you had the power to shoot lasers he'd be blind by now. You're about to speak up again, when he headbutts you. Hard.

"Ouch!" you yelp, punching him in the arm as hard as you can. He just traps your fist in his, squeezing until you wince, then lets go, smirking.

"Don't play with me, girl," he says while getting off of you. You pout, rubbing the spot he hit on your forehead.

"Asshole," you mumble.

"Mh? What'd you say?"

"Nothing, sir," you respond mockingly, assuming the position of a soldier. "You know what, I'm going to report you to the police for domestic violence," you continue, still pouting.

He throws you a single cube of ice. You raise an eyebrow.

"That's all we have, make it work. I ain't got the money for court," he shrugs.

Something clicks in your brain. You know he sees it. You see it from the way his eyes widen waiting for you. "Is this what this was about?"

He sighs, then sits on the floor across from your figure, which is still standing by the sink. You raise the ice cube on your forehead. This feels nice.

"Yuu asked me to accompany him trick or treating on Halloween."

You wait, but he's not looking at you anymore. He seems distant.

"Oookaaay, and...?" you push. He sighs again. His hand repeatedly passes through his pink locks.

"I picked up a double shift for Halloween like... last week. I can't lose the money right now, or I won't have enough for rent on the 1st," he grits out, keeping his head low. You hum. You throw the melted ice cube in the sink near the cigarette. The image makes you smile. It looks like you two.

You get down on the floor too, the tip of your sock clad feet grazing his.

"You could've asked me, you know," you say, trying to sound nonchalant. He scoffs.

"Baby, I know you're whipped, but I didn't think you wanted to be a sugar mommy at twentytwo," he says smirking. You try kicking him, but he just gets out of the way, snickering. "I'm not asking a girl for money, that's fucking humiliating."

"I'm serious, idiot. If you didn't want the money I could've taken Yuuji for you, it's not like it's the first time," you tell him, rolling your eyes. "He tried to be strong for you at the end, I know you know," you add, delicately this time, Tentatively. He stares at you and sighs for what feels like the hundredth time. He grabs your foot again and manspreads, just to position your calf on his thigh. This position feels incredibly intimate, and you try not to stiffen. You two have never been the cuddly type of roommates, but he looks like he could use a little bit of physical contact.

"It wouldn't be the same. He wants me there because all of the other kids are with their families, even if he doesn't want to tell me so. Satoru texted me about it this morning. He's taking the two brats he basically adopted too," he rambles. Sukuna is not one to open up, so you just let him talk, absorbing everything like a sponge.

"Couldn't you like... move the appointments up by a few hours?" you ask.

"I could, but I still have two fucking assignments for Halloween. If I don't turn them in I'm fucked, and I need the scholarship," he grits out. His thumb caresses your exposed ankle mindlessly. Shivers run up the entirety of your leg.

Suddenly, an idea pops into your mind.

"But what if you had an amazing roommate who oh so happened to love your brother so dearly that could turn said assignments in for you if it meant to see him happy?" you say, looking at him expectantly.

"I can't ask you that, come on," he rolls his eyes. You jump up, almost falling over him in the process. "I'm not doing that for free."

"I knew you were a bitch," he growls. You just whistle, going toward the door. He squeezes his eyes hard, before opening them, jumping up too and grabbing your wrist before you can exit the kitchen.

"What do you want?"

You grin.

That's how you find yourself holding a badly sponged muscled up Tarzan-Yuuji's little hand while going from door to door, your cute yellow Jane dress on.

"Might have given you a concussion the other day, doll," Sukuna, dressed as a monkey, grumbles next to you. You laugh, and he throws you a mean glare.

Yuuji leaves your side and runs up to his friends, screaming "Trick or treat!" with them, beaming. He looks back at you from time to time, smiling, offering you something every time the people he rings the doorbell of give him more than one candy.

You suddenly feel an arm drape over your shoulders roughly, before getting slammed into a hairy side.

"Thank you, y'know," Sukuna mumbles near your ear, pressing your head in a way where you're not able to see his expression. Then, he pushes you away. "Not for the fucking costume, that's for sure," he adds, disgusted, scratching his neck and arm at the same time. You just stand there, mouth gaping a little, in front of him.

"Cat got your tongue, sugar mama?" He tells you after a while, grinning.

You scowl, fake mad, before chuckling. "Who knew you were capable of saying thank you?"

"Don't get used to it."

[javierpena-inatacvest]

Agent Peña

Summary: You and Javi are unpacking as you move into your new house, when you come across something unusual in one of the boxes. Surprise, it's Javi's old tac vest, and boy, do you need to show him how good he still looks in it.

Word Count: 5.3K (I'm surprised it's not longer, I could write a thesis about this vest)

Pairing: Husband!Javier Peña x Wife!reader (no used of y/n, reader's nickname is Osita)

Warnings: SMUT (18+) BOY OH BOY- unprotected p in v sex (be better pls), oral (m receiving), face fucking, mastrubation (f), big ole praise kink, creampie, cum play (ig??), soft dom!Javi (still being our consent king as always), Javi lifts reader up on the dresser and holds her hair, Javi's got a FILTHY mouth, THE VEST STAYS ON LADIES AND GENTS (gn)

A/N: ....Well.... Here we are. This idea has been rotting in the back of my brain for SO long, and I am finally ready to serve my time in horny jail 🫡 As y'all know, Javi's tac vest is deeply important to me, and it only feels right to support my namesake as such by sharing my deeply dirty thoughts of getting absolutely obliterated by this man in that stupid fucking vest. If you know me, no you DON'T, please do not make eye contact with me for the next 7-10 business days. ��

This can be read as a stand alone, or as a part of the It's Never Too Late Series!!

“Are you sure this is the last box?” 

“Yes, Hermosa, I’m positive.”

“Well, that was your answer 3 boxes ago, Jav.” 

You laughed to yourself, hauling what was supposedly the last cardboard box out of the back of Javi’s truck as you followed behind him into your new house. Your official move in day had finally come, and while you and Javi had been periodically transporting things from your apartment to the new house since it had been finished with construction, today was the last day on your lease, and the first day of your forever in your new home together. While you couldn't have been more excited to finally be in a real home of your own with Javi, you were much less excited about the 47 trips you had made in and out of the house, hauling boxes to and from Javi’s truck, and unpacking your entire existence into your new living space. 

You let out a little grunt as you set down the box into the mountain-like pile that had accumulated in your living room, Javi sneaking up behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist as he planted a soft kiss on your shoulder. 

“You promise this was the last one?” You giggled, your voice oozing with sarcasm as you gave Javi a playful nudge while he held you in his grasp. 

“Promise.” He laughed, giving you a squeeze, only making you squeal and squirm even more. “Hopefully unpacking shouldn’t take too long, I’ll start moving the heavier shit upstairs and in the garage, and I’ll come help you down here when I’m done.” 

“What, are you saying I'm not strong enough to carry the heavy boxes? Rude.” You teased, spinning around to face him, crossing your arms over your chest, one eyebrow raised. 

“You know that’s not what I’m trying to say, you dork.” Javi sighed, rolling his eyes at your utter lack of seriousness in response to his comment. 

“I don’t know… Sure seems like it to me… I just don’t think that- HEY! PUT ME DOWN! STOP, STOP, YOU MEANIE!” You screeched, flapping your arms in hysterical laughter as Javi slung you over his shoulder, trapping you in the only way he’d figured out how to get you to stop with your never ending sass- tickling you until you were close to tears. “Fine, I- Javi! Stop! You win! You win! Let me go, you butt!” 

“Did you just call me a butt?” He snorted, setting you back down on the ground, smirking at the goofy grin on your face as you tried to recompose yourself, post tickle torture. 

“I would have come up with a better insult if I wasn’t close to almost peeing my pants.” You grumbled, sticking your tongue out at Javi, the two of you trying your best to keep from bursting into laughter again. 

“Will you just go start unpacking, weirdo? The sooner we’re done, the sooner we can go break in the new bed.” He smirked, biting down on his lip, his eyes looking you up and down with a mischievous sparkle. 

“Oooorrrrrr… We could just go break it in now and unpack later?” You shrugged, placing your hands on Javi’s chest, grabbing a fist full of the soft cotton of his worn t-shirt as you pressed up on your tiptoes and placed a kiss on his pouty lip. 

“As much as I want to,” He paused, pressing his lips back into yours, feeling the smile of his smug grin, “If we go now, there’s no way all of this is ever getting unpacked.” 

“Ugh, fine. You win again, Mr. Reasonable.” You frowned, giving him one last quick kiss before pulling away to search through the endless sea of cardboard to sort where each box needed to go. You reached down, hoisting up one labeled “bedroom” and resting it on your hip, pointing to the scratchy scribbles of Javi’s handwriting. “Look! I’m already going to the bedroom, soooooo…” 

“Osita…”   

“Fine, fine. You better move those boxes fast. Rude to keep your wife waiting like this, ya know.” 

“Will you please just go unpack, Hermosa?” He sighed, laughing and shaking his head, hiking up two boxes, heavy enough to make his biceps flex and the veins in his forearms incredibly noticeable. You could almost hear yourself audibly gulp as you watched him walk up the stairs, the muscles of his back flexing and straining deliciously against the gray cotton of his t-shirt. 

“Jesus fucking Christ…” You muttered to yourself, in awe of your husband’s sheer broadness. So in awe, in fact, that you hadn’t even realized you had let your box slip from its place resting against your hip onto the living room floor, making you jump and startle yourself, scrambling to try and pick it back up in hopes that Javi hadn’t noticed. 

“You okay, baby?” Javi shouted from halfway up the stairs, peeking his head over the railing to see what had happened. 

“Yup, yup, totallyyyyy fine, all good, just going to unpack, nothing to see here.” You mumbled, darting down the hallway, eyes peeled in whatever direction was the exact opposite of Javi. 

Oof. You better find a way to become the world’s fastest unpacker. 

Thankfully, you and Javi seemed to make an unspoken pact to unpack in separate parts of the house to avoid distracting each other, Javi now working on organizing things in the garage while you worked on sorting all of the things that belonged in your master bedroom. Clothes and sheets had been easy to put away compared to all of the pots and pans you had unboxed in the kitchen before this, working your best to put things away as fast as you could with keeping the metal clashing and clanging to a minimum.

 As you dragged the last box labeled “Master Bedroom” into your room from the hallway, you were curious what kind of contents could be inside, considering you’d put away all of yours and Javi’s clothes, and whatever bedding belonged in your room. You spun the box around to each side, looking for any more clues, until your last turn, where you found “Javi DEA” printed on the upper corner. 

You paused for a moment, letting your fingers drum across the tattered cardboard, questioning whether or not you should leave it for Javi to deal with, or open it up for yourself. You gently chewed on your bottom lip as you internally debated, trying to rationalize with yourself before quite literally opening up a box into Javi’s past.

You had heard about the good, bad and ugly that had been Javi’s life in Colombia before returning home to Laredo, so you would be shocked to find something in this box that Javi really didn’t want you to see. 

It’s not like there was anything he’d be trying to hide from you in there, right? Probably just a bunch of badges and paperwork, anyways. 

With a little sigh and a shrug, you carefully ripped down the seam of the tape holding the box together, slowly lifting the cardboard flaps to reveal the contents inside. As you peeked into the box, you let out a little huff of relief to find out that your suspicions were correct- nothing but file folders, old badges and ancient coffee mugs with DEA symbols slapped across the front. 

You began making your way through the box, sorting its contents into piles for Javi to go through once he was finished in the garage. Even though majority of the items inside the DEA box were less than thrilling (unless you had a thing for reading 50 page long contracts full of legal jargon), you did get a kick out of Javi’s old badges, giggling at his grumpy frown that seemed to be plastered across his face in every picture he took from the time he started, until he retired. What cracked you up even more was finding the badges from the first few years Javi must have started working for the DEA, still sporting his signature pout, but with a clean shaven baby face you had only had the pleasure of seeing from the photo albums of Javi's youth that his father, Chucho, had so lovingly offered to share with you.

You gave the picture a sweet smile before setting it down with the rest of the badges in the growing pile, mindlessly reaching back into the box to pull out what you assumed would be more file folders full of paperwork. Except this time, you felt your fingertips graze against what felt like tough and worn fabric, dragging your hand further along the cloth until hitting a patch of scratchy velcro, making you cock your head in confusion. You scooted yourself over closer to the box, peering under the few manilla folders left inside to spot an army green strap popping out from in between them. 

Now very much intrigued, you dug your hand between the sea of papers, yanking on the mystery item to reveal a deep olive green vest, followed by a few crinkled pictures that must have been stuck inside it, gently fluttering to the floor in front of you. You set down the much heavier than expected vest to pick up one of the photos face down on the carpet, only to turn it over and feel your jaw practically drop to the floor and eyes bulge out of your skull. Because in that picture, was not just any photo of Javi from his time in Colombia, this was a photo of Javi, in the very vest that you had dug out from the bottom of his box. 

And holy fuck did he look hot. 

Frantically, you picked up another photo that had fallen to the floor, feeling your heart legitimately skip a beat to find it was another shot of him in the vest, his dark curls sticking to his forehead from the sweat soaking his skin and the light blue button down underneath it, hands resting on the hips of his dark gray khaki pants that left very little to the imagination. You flipped over one last picture, only to find the same, breathtaking visual of him in that damn vest, his biceps straining against the sweat-stained cotton of his army green shirt, the veins in his forearms prominently on display as he held the gun he was carrying pointed at the ground. 

While you had never seen these photos, or even known about this mystery vest until today, there was a part of you that was glad you hadn’t- the way Javi looked suited up in that vest had your head reeling in a way you weren’t sure you’d ever recover from, because Jesus Fucking Christ, it was the hottest goddamn thing you’d ever seen. 

Your eyes darted back and forth between the three photos, each picture somehow looking better than the last every time you found a new detail to drink in that made Javi look even more delicious.

Holy fuck.

You couldn’t help but let your mind wander even further than it already was, picturing what Javi would look like with it on now, the broadness of his shoulders filling out the vest even more than he would have the last time he wore it. 

You were so entranced, so lost in ogling at how attractive Javi looked in the vest, that you hadn’t noticed the sound his familiar footsteps trudging down the hallway, stopping in the doorway of your bedroom and watching you as you sat cross legged on the floor, hunched over the now nearly empty box. 

“Hey, Hermosa, I’m almost all done in the garage if you wanna-” Javi’s voice quietly trailed off as his eyes wandered, looking at the items from inside the box spread across the floor, stopping at the long forgotten sight of his old tac vest propped up against the cardboard.

He couldn’t help but quietly laugh to himself, simply out of shock that you had even found the vest in the first place, considering he hadn’t even remembered it had been living inside a box that hadn’t been touched since it was shipped back to Laredo with the rest of his things post DEA.

“Where the hell’d you find this? I haven’t seen this thing in fucking years.” He chuckled, reaching down to pick up the well worn armor, letting his thumb run along the seams of the rough fabric as he held it up in front of him, blocking your blushing and bright red face from his view. 

“It was uh- it was at the bottom of the box.” You gulped, trying not to stumble over your words, biting down on your tongue to try and keep your embarrassingly sheepish smirk at bay, Javi’s eyes now meeting yours as he lowered the vest from his view. He tilted his head in confusion at your clearly flustered state, reaching out his free hand to gently grab your arm, rubbing his thumb back and forth across your skin, his touch only making you more riled up. 

“Hermosa, are you okay?” 

“Yeah I’m- yes, I’m- I’m fine, it’s stupid.” You muttered, making no attempts to cover up your clearly blatant lie, darting your eyes away from Javi and shifting your gaze to the floor to try and hide your hot, flushed face, embarrassed that you were this worked up from 3 old photos and a piece of police gear.

But unfortunately for you, Javi knew you like the back of his hand, and knew all too well when you weren’t telling him something that was on your mind. 

Letting his hand slide up your arm and across your collarbone, he stopped at your chin, forcing your gaze back on him, giving you a smug shrug and raise of his eyebrows, silently waiting for your real response, the one he knew you were hiding behind your bashful facade. 

“What’s going on, baby?” 

With your eyes locked on his, thumb resting under your jaw, you had no choice but to swallow your own pride, the sweet dark brown of his glare coaxing your sheepish secret right out of you. 

“There were- there were pictures of you in the vest in the box. You look- Jesus, Javi, you look really fucking hot.” 

“That’s it?” He laughed, softly swiping his thumb across your cheek, still feeling like he hadn’t quite gotten everything out of you. 

“Well I was thinking... that uh- if- what-” 

“What, baby? Talk to me, it’s okay.” 

Oh, fuck me. 

“Would you, um, would- would you put it on?” 

“Put it on?” He chuckled, lifting up the vest, gesturing towards it. 

“Mhhmmmm.” You nodded, letting your tongue run against your teeth before biting down on your bottom lip, feeling a rush of heat rapidly creeping through your body. 

“Like, right now?” 

“Like, right now.” 

Realizing that you were completely serious about your request, Javi let out a playful scoff, running his hand over the back of his neck, almost as flustered by your ask as you were at the thought alone of seeing him in his vest. 

“Really? I mean, uh- yeah, okay.” Working in a quick and determined silence, Javi began slipping the vest over his head, pulling it over his broad shoulders and unfastening the velcro sides before readjusting them, tugging the flaps tighter against his stomach to hold them in place, quietly grumbling to himself. “Used to be able to pull these a lot tighter…” He groaned, flattening the last strap against the velcro.

As his focused shifted from his vest to you, he couldn’t help but smirk at the dumbfounded look on your face- the image in front of you leaving you so completely stunned, you felt like you needed to wipe the corner of your mouth to make sure that there wasn’t any drool coming out of it. Your brain was so short circuited, at a loss to form any sort of coherent sentence, the best you could muster out was a low, shaky, “Holy fucking shit.” 

“Didn’t know you had a thing for tactical vests.” Javi grinned with a devilish look slowing spreading across his face, seeing the complete and utter mess you were becoming as he slowly stepped towards you, the looming image of his broad body in that fucking vest making your heart race and your palms sweat. 

“Well, I- I didn’t, um, I didn’t-” You stammered, your breath trembling as you tried to respond, your brain going blank as you watched Javi approach you. Before you had a chance to even try to and concoct some sort of answer, Javi’s hand was back under your chin, fingers wrapped around your jaw with a much tighter and demanding presence than just a few moments ago, sensing the undeniable shift of palpable tension in the room. 

“Didn’t what? Use your words, sweet girl.” He rasped, teasing you with his knowingly smug smirk, his words shooting straight to your core, making your stomach flip in anxious arousal. 

You could feel your words bobbing in your throat as you swallowed, your tongue darting out of your parted mouth, desperate to taste Javi’s lips now barely ghosting yours, patiently waiting for your response, relishing in the needy mess he could sense you were quickly becoming. 

“Didn’t realize it until I saw you in it. You look- fuck- you look so hot.” You whispered, feeling his warm breath against your skin as he sucked at your pulse point, his teeth nipping at your neck as a ragged moan escaped your mouth. “Javi…” 

“Not gonna give you what you want 'till you tell me. I wanna hear you say it. Tell me what you want.” You could practically feel his satisfied smirk as his kisses worked their way down your neck towards your chest, each press of his lips taunting you, only making it harder and harder for any part of your brain to function. 

“I wanna- fuck- I wanna suck your dick. Fuck, I need to taste you.” You whimpered, reaching out to run your hand across his vest, letting it trail from his chest, down to his stomach, your fingertips grazing his belt buckle before a firm grasp wrapped around your wrist, holding your hand in place and stopping it from traveling any further. 

“Nuh-uh.” Javi tutted, rasping in your ear. “Be a good girl and ask first. Tell me how badly you need it.”  

“Please, Javi. Fuck, please let me suck your dick, baby. Please.” You moaned, sounding more desperate than you had intended, but fuck, there was nothing you wanted to do more than drop to your knees and worship him in the most sinful way you could.  

“Jesus, you’re so fucking pretty when you beg for it. You need me that bad, Hermosa?” Javi grinned, feeling you nod your head frantically, the hand he was holding in his grasp reaching for below his belt. “Okay, baby, show me how bad you need me, huh?” 

In an instant, you were dragging your hands down his vest, sinking to the ground as you frantically worked to undo his belt buckle, the quiet clang of the metal singing a song of sweet relief as you shuffled his pants down his legs before hooking your fingers around the elastic waistband of his boxers, tugging them down to meet his pants. pooling around his ankles. His cock sprung free as it was released, already painfully hard and weeping with precum as it slapped against his stomach, the sight alone making you lick your lips. You kissed the inside of his thighs, trailing your way up to his shaft in long, languid movements, dragging your tongue back and forth along the underside of his cock before sinking just his tip between your lips, swirling it in your mouth. 

You had barely touched him, but you were already so worked up that what had started as just a wet patch in your underwear had now turned into the fabric becoming completely soaked in your slick, leaving your cunt aching and throbbing. With your mouth still sucking and flicking at his tip, you couldn’t help but let your hand snake down your front, sneaking between your skin and the waistband of your pants as it dipped into your underwear. You let your fingers slide through your folds, before sinking them into your heat, your hips instinctively grinding down on your hand to find any sort of temporary relief as you fucked yourself with your fingers. 

Looking up at him with batted lashes, you sunk your mouth deeper down on his length, hollowing your cheeks as you took him inch by inch, watching his eyes go wide as you took the hand that had just been inside your pants back out to reveal the shiny slick covering your fingers, then wrapping them around his base, covering his shaft in your arousal. 

It was taking everything in him just to say fuck it right then and there, to toss you onto the bed and fuck you until you were begging him to stop, but watching the way you worked around his cock so needily had him so stunned, he couldn’t bring himself to do anything but let you work your magic. 

“Jesus, fuck…” Javi muttered to himself, already feeling his balls beginning to tighten as your head bobbed along his dick, sinking down just enough to let the deep, musky scent of the curls at the base of his shaft tickle your nostrils. 

It wasn’t long before his hand was buried deep in your hair, his fingers cradling the back of your head as his hips began to buck towards your face, trying to hold himself back from full-on fucking your throat, until your fingers wrapped around the back of his thighs, bracing yourself as you gave Javi your silent nod of approval to keep going. Letting a low groan rumble in his chest, his second hand met the one already palming the back of your head, guiding you up and down his cock as he thrust deeper into your throat, tears welling in your eyes and saliva spilling out the corners of your mouth. His tip brushed against your gag reflex, making you dig your fingertips further and further into his skin. 

“Oh fuck- this what you wanted, Quierda? To get on your knees and let me- shit, shit, shit- fuck that pretty little mouth of yours like the good girl you are?” Javi hissed through gritted teeth, trying to keep himself together as he watched his length slide in and out of your mouth, tempted to let himself go and spill deep down your throat, watching his spend drip down your lips. But he knew he’d be kicking himself if he wasn’t finishing buried in the depths of your cunt, your warm, wet walls milking him of every last drop, clenching around him as you came. 

That was enough to pull him back to his senses, guiding his dick out of your mouth, the two of you catching your breath as you wiped your hand with the back of your mouth in confusion, wondering what had made him back off so quickly. 

“Javi, are you okay? Did I do something wr-oh!” You gasped, stumbling as Javi forcefully pulled you to your feet, manhandling you towards your dresser, your mouths becoming a mess of tangled tongues and teeth as your back bumped against the wooden edge. Javi’s hands were under your legs, grabbing you and hosting you up to sit on top of it, ripping your pants and underwear down off your hips and tossing them to the floor. 

“I need to be inside you. Fuck, I need to feel you when I fuck you full of me.” He mewled, reaching down to stroke himself as he lined his dick up with your entrance, running his tip through your folds, coating it even more in your slick before sinking himself deep into your pussy, flushing his hips against you as his cock bumped against your cervix. Even though you were already soaking wet, you couldn’t help but whimper at the sweet sting of how full Javi’s stretch made you feel, gripping around the shoulder straps of his tac vest for dear life as he began to thrust in and out of you, already setting a punishing, desperate pace. 

You wrapped your legs around the small of his back just under his vest, whimpering and moaning into his shoulder as your buried your face in the crook of his neck the lewd noises of muted moans and slapping skin filling the room as Javi punched into you, his cock splitting you open in the best way possible. 

“Javi, oh fuck baby, fuck, you feel so good, oh shit-”  You whined, your brain going blank, babbling between moans, already feeling a tingle beginning to build at the base of your spine while Javi’s hands gripped around your hips, holding you in place as he fucked into you hard and deep. Your cunt was starting to clench around his cock, pounding into that sweet spot inside you that had you seeing stars and screaming his name as you could feel yourself coming undone around him. 

Rutting your hips against him, the hairs at his base rubbed your clit, the friction giving you just enough stimulation to send you over the edge, your orgasm crashing through you with a ferocious intensity, flooding every inch of your body with pleasure. 

“That’s it. Give it to me, Hermosa. Fuck- cum all over me baby girl.” Javi hissed through gritted teeth, his words humming deep in his throat as he fucked you through your high, his hands holding you in place as you melted into him, your body going limp as you came. “You gonna give me another one, Querida? Be a good girl and give me one more before I fuck you so full of me, I’ll be dripping out of you for days.” 

You were so lost in your pleasure, you couldn’t find any words, simply nodding your head as you moaned into his neck, only starting to come to when you suddenly felt an emptiness in your cunt, Javi pulling out to scoot you off the dresser, guiding your feet to the floor as he turned you over, splaying your chest across the wooden surface and pinning your arms behind your back. Gently nudging your feet wider, you could feel his broad body looming over yours, his hot breath dancing across your neck as he nibbled at your ear. 

“You still okay, Osita?” 

“Mhmmmm” You whimpered, your body trembling as Javi’s hands ran across your hips, feeling his hard length pressed against your ass, wiggling your bottom half against him, desperate for him to ease the emptiness between your legs again. 

“Lemme hear you say it, baby. Tell me how bad you need it.” Javi grunted, now dragging his cock through your folds, teasing your dripping entrance, waiting painfully patiently for your response. 

“I need it so bad, Javi, please, please baby.” You moaned, rolling your hips and pushing your ass back on him, doing anything to try and feel him inside you again. 

“My needy girl. Shhhhh, it’s okay baby, I’ve got you.” Javi smirked, flushing his hips against your ass as he bottomed out inside you, the fullness making you cry out in pleasure.

He slowly began thrusting in and out of you, dragging his cock along your heat, each stroke punching against your g-spot, so wet that you could hear each rut of his hips as he buried himself deeper and deeper into your hilt. 

You were so blissed out, barely hanging by a thread as you felt heat beginning to bloom in your belly once again, that you were resting your head against the dresser, closing your eyes as you felt yourself coming undone. That was until Javi’s firm grasp shifted from pinning your hands behind your back to sliding up your neck, resting his hand under your jaw and forcing your gaze into the mirror on top of your dresser. 

Your eyes locked with Javi’s, the reflection of him in his vest towering behind you as he thrusted into you over and over, watching the brown pools of his eyes darken with lust as he watched you slowly begin to come undone under him. 

“Eyes on me, baby. Wanna see that pretty face when you cum all over me.” 

The image of him was all consuming- His wide shoulders spilling from the sides of the vest, his dark, damp curls sticking to his forehead from the sheen of his sweat that had begun to pool in his brow, the wrecked look painted across his face making you weaker and weaker as you could feel the heat creeping up your legs and through your core. 

Reaching back, you grabbed on to the side of his vest, burying your fingers into the thick fabric for dear life as his pace began to quicken, his thrusts becoming faster and sloppier with each snaps of his hips as he felt your pussy fluttering around his length, watching you turn into a puddle below him. 

“I know you’re close, baby. C’mon Hermosa, oh shit- give it to me.” Javi grunted, letting his hand drop from your jaw to snake down your body, the pads of his fingers circling your clit with just enough force to have you screaming his name, clenching your cunt around his cock as you came. 

“Javi, Javi, oh fuck, fuck, fuck-” You babbled, your eyes practically rolling in the back of your head as Javi began to follow suit, rambling incoherently, chasing his own high. 

“I know, baby, I know. Such a good fucking girl, taking me so well. Fuck, oh shit- I’m close, too. Oh, fuck me- Jesus Christ, I’m gonna-ahhhhhh-” With only a few more thrusts, Javi was spilling inside you, his spend pulsing against your walls as he milked himself of every drop he had, his body slumping over yours as your chests rose and fell in sync, trying to catch your breath. 

Your legs trembled as the warm mix of your spend trailed down your thighs, only to be caught by his fingers, slowly dragging your combined arousal back up your skin before taking it and pushing it back into your entrance, languidly pulsing his digits in and out of your dripping hole, making a ragged moan fall from your lips as he nipped at your neck, softly sucking at your pulse point. 

“Gonna keep you full of me all night, sweet girl, all fucking night.” 

“Holy fuck…” You whined, finally catching your breath enough to speak before pushing yourself back up to stand, turning around to grab Javi’s face, pulling him in for an electric, passionate kiss before letting your hands rest on the worn army green of his vest, quietly laughing to yourself in disbelief. “Jesus fucking Christ, Javi.” 

“You okay, Osita? Sorry if I got carried away, I just- fuck, seeing how worked up you were, I-” 

“Javier Jesús Peña, you better not be apologizing to me for being the hottest fucking thing I’ve ever seen in that goddamn vest. I swear to God, I’m never letting you take that thing off. Well… On second thought, if you don’t take it off I don’t think I will ever be productive ever again because holy shit.” 

The two of you couldn’t help but laugh to yourselves as Javi wrapped his arms around your waist, his thumbs tracing soft circles against the bare skin of your hips, looking out at the scattered sea of pants and underwear on the floor that had been quickly left behind during your horny antics. 

“Well, if you let me take it off,” Javi grinned, pressing a chast kiss on your cheek and then peppering them towards your lips, “then we can go take a shower to clean up,” he paused again, feeling his smile against your mouth, “we can go break in the bed, and I can return your little favor from earlier since someone was too eager to get dicked down to let me.” 

“Oh, shut up, can you blame me? Don’t have to ask me twice.” You giggled, raising a playful eyebrow at Javi. “Just promise me one thing, okay?” 

“Of course, Hermosa. Anything.” 

“Don’t you ever get rid of that fucking vest, Agent Peña.” 

Taglist:

@cool-iguana @rhoorl @whyjuliaaa @bbiophiliaa @pertinentpostmortem @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24 @3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85 @partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo @endlessthxxghts @beware-my-thorns @missladym1981 @messinadress @milly-louise @jay-zzle @the-one-with-the-grey-color @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled @pedropascallvr @millennial-teenybopper @nastiasnow @vee-bees-blog @hopplessilse @mxtokko @its-nebuleuse @mandoisapunk @msmorningstaarr @amyispxnk @honeyedmiller @mountainsandmayhem

[preciousjoongie]

↯ MAKE HER TAP OUT ↯

↯ synopsis ⇝ jaehyun, your enemy, challenges you and sees how long you can hold off being edged.

↯ warning ⇝ smut, enemies to friends with benefits, college setting, edging, overstim, squirting (all f!receiving)

you were perch against a tree in the middle of campus, a large textbook laid out in your lap. your face was a picture of stress with the way your eyebrows furrowed and your nose was slightly scrunched.

"having trouble?" an annoyingly smooth voice rang out, pulling you out of your deep state of concentration. a shadow of a tall but sculpted figure was casted a shadow on your and your books. if this wasn't going to make you go insane, he would.

rolling your eyes, you looked up at home. jeong jaehyun. the most annoying person on campus. or should i say on earth. you two went to high school together but he never really acted like this. he was actually on the shier side, only have up to 3 friends. but now that he's gotten into college, he tries to act like he's been this way forever.

yes, people can change. but you didn't really expect it to be jaehyun. you excepted him to be a nicer and kinder person but this.. this was bullshit. you should've stuck with your gut feeling and just kept yourself trapped inside of your dorm room all day.

"i'm perfectly fine," your voice was monotoned and laced with annoyance; it made him chuckle. "why do you hate me so much, baby?" you weren't gonna lie and say that him calling you that didn't make you feel some type of way. regardless, you wasted no time to give a response, "maybe because you're an asshole."

you roughly closed your text book and picked up the rest of your supplies, stuffing it all in your bag. jaehyun looked around at the other people in the park, "you don't have to be so loud, you know? it was just a question." he looked back down at you. you got up, throwing your bag over your shoulder. "yeah, well, regardless of how i say it, you're still an asshole."

"maybe i'm not an asshole. maybe you just think i am." he said, trying to match your quick pace. "why are you following me?" you said, now walking down the empty and concrete path you take to get to your dorm.

completely ignoring your question, he brought up something that made you want to snap his body in half. "or maybe you're just mad that i won that scholarship and you didn't." you stopped in your tracks. he stopped just a couple feet behind you.

you turned around, "yes, that is why i'm angry. your family is rich that you could buy my entire bloodline. and that scholarship was the only i could afford to come here! this is one of the most prestigious schools in the world and i could've had a full ride if it wasn't for you. now my family is in life long debt and if i don't become successful then i'm done for." you threw my hands up and brought them back down, softly hitting your plush thighs.

he sighed, always feeling bad about stealing that from you. "now, please leave me alone so i can become successful and save my family." you turned back around and continued walking. but you came to a halt again as you heard jaehyun speak. turning back around, you saw him walk closer. "i'll pay it off. all of it." his hands in his pockets.

you wanted to tell him off and tell him that you didn't need his sympathy money. but in reality, you did. you needed all the money you could get. "only if you can do one thing." and there's the catch. part of you knew it was too good to be true. "uh-huh." you mumbled.

he stepped forward, hovering over you. "i wanna edge you, see how long you can. and if you last longer than my timer.. then, yeah, i'll pay it off. but if you tap out before then.. bye bye money." his voice was low and cold. you could tell he meant it.

your face shifted into disgust, shaking your head. "fuck you, jeong jaehyun." you said before walking off to your dorm room. he watched you walk. walked the way your hips swayed and the way your hair slightly bounced as you did. he knew if he were in front of you, he'd get to see your round tits bounce as well.

it's been hours since that interaction with jaehyun. you sat at your desk, working on your math when you got a call. it was your mom. "hi, sweetie," her sweet voice sounded. "hi, mom." a smile beamed across your face.

you heard a heavy sigh come through the speaker of the phone. uh oh. that's not good. "is everything ok?" you asked. "well, your father and i would lie to you and say it is but, it's not. honey, you're gonna have to come home after this semester. we can't keep taking out loans from the bank. we are so sorry." your moms voice was shaky and she was hesitant to speak.

you pursed your lips in order to try and hold back some of the tears that wanted to fall. you sniffled before speaking, "it's ok. i understand. t-thank you for telling me..?" you didn't know what else to say.

after your mom hung up and you wiped your tears, you remembered what that giant pervert said. how hard could it be to last a couple minutes being edged? you sighed, can't believe you were actually about to do this.

you quickly walked out the door, going down the single suites downstairs. this is what you could've had if jaehyun hadn't have stolen this from you. "hey, hey, do you know where jeong jaehyun stays by any chance?" you asked one of the boys on the hall.

"last door to your left." he said. you quickly thanked you, almost sprinting down the hallway. as you got there, his door was decorated with blue stickers. you rolled your eyes at how childish the stickers were. you took a deep breath before knocking, trying to not think about.knowing if you thought about it, you would've ended up back in your dorm room and packing.

about 10 seconds later, the door opened to a wait haired and shirtless jaehyun. he smiled. you huffed, pushing him into his room and closing the door. "look what the cat dragged in," he smirked with a cocky laugh.

"are we gonna do this or what?" you were impatient. not to be touched by jaehyun but to just live a life where you don't have to live in debt and where it's not eating you and your family alive.

"someone's eager." he ran a hand through his hair. you crossed your arms and your head fell back. he licked his lips looking at you before grabbing his phone. "c'mere." he gestured. you walked over to him, looking at a spiny wheel on his phone. each section had a different number from .30-5 hours. you tapped the middle to spin with furrowed eyebrows.

it stopped on two and jaehyun nodded with a smile. "i'm confused, what does this mean?" you looked up at him. "2 hours. that's how long you belong to me, doll."

"2 hours? what!? and what do you mean by "belong to you"!?" you exclaimed loudly. he threw his hands up, "you work for what you deserve." you huffed before inhaling, ready to finally tell him off but before you could do that he pick you up, throwing you over his shoulder as if you were a sack, "yeah, yeah. i've heard enough of you running your mouth today. how about we hear some of those pretty moans instead." he entered his bedroom, closing the door. setting you down on the bed, and standing in front of you, you started your shit again. he was so tired of it.

"oh, you are such a pervert." you bit back at him. he quickly shut you up by pushing you backwards on his bed. a small shriek rang through jaehyun's ears after action. you sat up on your elbows. "i'm gonna take these off, okay?" his voice was softer, changing the whole mood from tense to calm. you nodded, not even hesitating. you laid back down fully, not even wanting to watch.

jaehyun slid down your shorts and your underwear in one swift motion. you felt so bare, your face heating up and your eyes widening. it went silent after the clothes hit the ground. sitting up, you saw jaehyun staring at your pussy in awe. he bit his lip before looking up at you with a smirk. "you're so wet, baby." he cooed before taking two fingers and running them through your folds. you hissed, your reaction making jaehyun's dick grow harder.

"i can't believe i have finally have you to myself." finally..? your face had confusion written all over it but since jaehyun had already started the timer, you didn't wanna annoy him anymore. he would've probably been an asshole again and add more time if you did.

"ready?" he asked, teasing your tight hole with two fingers. "yes," you squeaked out. he immediately, but slowly, stuck his fingers into your leaking cunt. a stunted groan echoed in the room. he curled his fingers, while quickly pumping them in and out of you. you furrowed your eyebrows and opened your mouth to moan but nothing came out for a second. that was until his long fingers brushed that sensitive spot in your pussy. you moaned loudly, now letting them flow out. his cold rings pressed against your clit, making you shudder but also bringing you closers as they gentle rubbed against it.

"j-jaehyun," you cried out. the sound of your wet pussy being finger fucked echoed throughout the room. "fuck!" you shrieked as you felt yourself about to cum. he saw the way your legs started to close are his arm and how your pussy did the same around his fingers.

he couldn't have that. he wouldn't. he quickly pulled them out before you could cum. a small whine left your lips. you tried to rely on rubbing your thighs together to get off. "good girl. good job letting me know how your gorgeous body works." he stroked the inside your thigh, trying to calm you down a bit before he got back at it. maybe he's not much of an asshole as you though.. still sj assume though.

you didn't hear when he dropped to his knees. all you could focus on the small twitches of your walls and you involuntarily clench around nothing. that was until you noticed warm air blowing on your pussy. before you could even lift your head an inch, a long stripe was licked up your pussy. jaehyun's tongue was flat. his hands gripped your thighs to stop you from moving your legs.

"ah, shit." you whimpered. you pulled up your shirt, and started to softly pinch your nipples. you were doing even more damage to yourself but you couldn't help it. you moaned as receiving pleasure from two different parts of your body. sure, you've played with your pussy and nipples at the same time but having someone eat you like this while you pinch your sensitive buds made it feel so much better.

you hand reached down to grab his hair. he was slurping up your juices so loud, like he was trying to quench his thirst. he shook his head into you cunt softly. you couldn't stop the lewd noises that came from your pussy and your mouth.

jaehyun was so into it. he couldn't care less if you came right now or not. he wanted to taste your cum so bad. but he knew to not let you go this easily. he wanted to work you up and break you back down over and over and over again until your body was shaking underneath him. until your body was like jello. he wanted to see you shattered. he wanted to make you tap out just to get him to stop.

he groaned into your pussy at how good you taste, "holy, fuck." he pulled away from your puffy pussy to mutter. your pussy was so wet and sticky since was covered in your juices and his spit. all thanks to him.

he drove right back in, not wanting to pull away from it again. his tongue fucked into you so deeply and when he softly nibbled or sucked on your clit, it drove you up the wall. "ah, fuck. jaehyun.." yoh legs started to close again making him pull back. you let out a groan, your high slowly faded away again.

that's how it was for next hour and a half. he would do anything and everything to push you close to the edge and pull you right back. he fingers you multiple times, sucked your tits and even used a vibrator he bought an hour before you even showed up, just knowing you were coming.

you body was shaking as jaehyun was back at eating you out. your body shook with every slurp, feeling his now warm rings at the rim of your hole. "jaehyun.. i cant do it anymore. it's too much for me," he staggered out. tears were flowing out of your eyes from some many rejects.

"come on, baby. i know you can do it." he tried to encourage you but it wasn't enough. your legs were too weak to tighten around his head. your hand left his hair to hold on to the covers that were soaked at the end from all your juices. but they're about to be soaked even more.

your core started to tighten but in a different way. it felt like you were gonna piss on yourself. "jaehyun.." you squeaked out which he hummed to. "jaehyun!" that's when hit the bed three times, tapping out. it was kinda of too late since the moment you tapped out, you squirted. it covered the bottoms of your thighs, the bed, and on jaehyun's chest and the bottom of his face and neck. you could hear the faint sound of your arousal dripping on the floor.

jaehyun licked his lips before smiling. embarrassment flooded your body as you thought you just pissed on him. "you just fucking squirted." he sounded amazed. which he was. he'd never made a girl squirt before. and him doing this, this was like an accomplishment. he chuckled a bit.

when you found out you just squirted, you felt relieved. but suddenly, you felt dread. you basically came before the timer. you wanted to sit up and say something but your body wouldn't allow you. jaehyun stood up and looked at your body. "oh, you look so beautiful, baby." he rubbed your thigh.

"look at this mess you made." he said gesturing towards his body. his abs were covered in your juices. you held back the whimper in your throat. even though your body felt like you couldn't even look around just using your eyes, you wanted to fuck jaehyun. you don't care if you have to tap out in the first second.. you wanted to feel him inside of you.

"fuck me." you whispered quietly. jaehyun didn't let you see the shock that went through his body. he thought you'd had enough and to be honest, he was going to let you rest for the rest of the week. knowing damn well you need it.

jaehyun's shorts weren't on for much longer. his cock was now stuffed deep inside of your swollen and abused cunt. you let out a strangled moan as his hips rubbed against your pussy clit. your hands wrapped around his neck. he moved quite slow at first until you asked him to go faster. he waited for you to say that. his hips snaps forward, his abs contracting with each thrust.

by the end of the night, or early morning, you were burned out. completely. jaehyun had to help you bathe and get back into your clothes. he laid you on the couch while he changed the soaking bedsheets. he brought you back into bed, laying next to you.

"don't worry. i was going to pay it regardless. and i know i'm a big pervert. but i'm a big pervert with a crush on you." he whispered as you had finally fell asleep, playing with your hair.

divider credits: @adornedwithlight

[jina-juhi]

Feels like

you can love again.

Pairing : Johnny × fem!reader

Rating : 18+

warning: smut with plot, protected sex, i tried fluff? fluffy sex? and heart break. and basically all things sex. oh alcoholism. cute sex? plus doggy style plus face sitting:) oral m/f

word count : 4.5k

summary : I could fuck you, right here, right now, but only if you'd ask.

[if you wanna skip to the smut part just go straight down]

Playlist

all too well, Taylor Swift

you heard me, Heather Sommer

1 step forward, 3 steps back, Olivia rodrigo

graveyard, halsey

right where you left me, taylor swift

wouldn't come back, Trousdale

ghost of you, Selena Gomez

company, Justin Bieber

yours, Raiden

crushing, illenium

begin again, Taylor Swift

feels like, Gracie Abraham

link

When all is said and done, and the person you loved is no longer there, what's left to do? How do you cope when you've given your all, only to find yourself empty, a mere shell of your former self? It's like being left with nothing but bones and muscles, a broken machine barely keeping you going.

So, how do you restart? How do you function when they've taken everything and left you with nothing? How do you shift your mindset to believe that this is all for the better? And most daunting of all, how do you open your heart to love again?

It feels like trying to breathe without air, as if the very essence of life has deserted you, leaving behind a jagged landscape of shattered pieces. It's dangerous to get too close to those sharp edges, so you stand alone and don't let anyone close. Trying to find yourself again.

Stand alone and contemplate what you've gotten yourself into and what you've done to yourself. How could you have ignored the warning signs? They were crystal clear. How could you have not predicted it? Too innocent.

Too gullible to let him in.

Thinking about it now feels pointless. "He was a nice guy, but he was too caught up in himself. He never really saw me. He claimed he did, but I never felt truly understood," you confide while he brews your coffee.

"I never felt loved by him," you add, as he sets the mugs on the counter—one for each of you. It's a chilly evening, and the cafe where he works is quieter than usual. You're a regular here; it feels like a safe haven, a place where you can find comfort in familiarity. You accept your coffee in silence, opting not to say more.

"Take a deep breath," he urges, his voice gentle as he nods, trying to seem strong and supportive. "How?" you reply absentmindedly, staring out the window where the fog thickens by the second. The ache in your heart grows, and despair overwhelms you as you fall back into the familiar trap of negative thoughts.

"He wasn't giving you what you needed. You shouldn't have to beg for love. Believe me when I say it's for the best that he's gone." He says.

"I loved him."

"You did, Maybe you still do, but people change," he interjects gently, his gaze fixed on the coffee between you, his words carefully chosen. "In different ways. You may have promised forever, but forever is a long time. Sometimes you grow together, and sometimes... you grow apart. It's nobody's fault in the end. You just drift away, lose that connection, maybe take each other for granted, and before you know it, the fights start."

His voice falters slightly, betraying the depth of his emotions. "I know it might not make sense right now, but what I'm trying to say is... you deserved more than what he could give you. Trust me, you're better off without him."

You inhale deeply, shaking your head in resignation. Raindrops cascade down the window, distorting the glow of the city lights outside. His words echo in your mind, and as you take another sip of coffee, its comforting aroma envelops you. Yes, he's right. You're undeniably better off without him, yet the ache lingers.

Why does it still hurt, months after the breakup? Why does the pain persist, stubbornly refusing to fade away? Days blur into months, but the heartache remains a constant companion. People change, move on. But the pain always stays. It gets a little better each day. You learn to accept. You learn to love yourself. Yet, just when you think you've moved on, something triggers that familiar ache, dragging you back to square one.

But life doesn't pause for heartache. Despite the pain, the world keeps spinning, and you move forward, one step forward and three steps back, hating, crying, wanting, but never stopping.

~~~

A year and almost a half have passed since then. Things have been getting better. The clouds are clearing up, leaving behind a little less hurt and a lot more clarity. There's a sense of hold, of something stirring within—gratefulness, perhaps, or hope. Or maybe its the sound of a familiar ring at the door. You turn around to see a familiar face, a smile lighting up your face as you recognize Johnny.

"A latte, please," you say as he approaches, his presence bringing a comforting warmth to the room. Johnny nods, his gentle demeanor never faltering as he starts to brew your coffee. Johnny's a gentleman, and a law student. He works part-time in this cafe, not because he's broke or anything. He simply lives the high life. Gym first, then college, and then in the cafe followed by late nights of studying. He's a quiet guy who keeps to himself. Disciplined and courteous. Doesn't really like to waste his time on the things undeserving of his attention.

Your friendship with Johnny began in this very place. You remember it must have been around 10 o'clock at night, you had just split up with your ex. It was a stormy night, It felt like the world was collapsing around you and someone was sucking the breath out of your lungs, alone and broken, you found this cafe nearby. The rain was pouring nonstop, so you decide to take refuge, sitting in the corner, your tears flow with the raindrops tapping against the windowpane.

Jhonny brings you a cup of coffee and a napkin with words of reassurance, "It'll be okay, just hold on."

He saw you when you felt invisible to the world, and he understood you when no one else could. In Johnny, you found not just a friend, but a shimmer of light in your darkest moments.

You still have that note.

Jhonny could hardly fathom the possibility of falling in love, especially with someone as uniquely eccentric as you. Little did he know, his heart had already been quietly captivated by your presence over the passing months. As you walked through that door, disheveled and drenched from the rain, the only word that echoed in his mind was "beautiful." From that moment on, an unspoken longing stirred within him, urging him to reach out and connect with you. He extended that napkin, not just to offer solace, but as a gesture of his desire to understand you, to unravel the mysteries you hide behind those smiles. There was an enigmatic force pulling him toward you, compelling him to take that first step.

You became a regular at the café, grateful for Johnny's caring nature. It seemed like nobody else noticed you like he did. Unintentionally, Johnny had fallen deeply in love with you over the past few months. He paid attention to everything about you - your likes, dislikes, comfort songs, and movies you could watch a 100 times.

He became your confidance, your best friend, always there when you needed him. Watching you cry over someone unworthy filled him with the desire to show you wat true love actually is. Late at night, he found himself thinking about you, wondering if you were okay, if you had eaten, or if you were thinking of him. He felt your sadness as if it were his own and rejoiced in your happiness. But despite his feelings, he couldn't bring himself to confess his love.

Simply put, Johnny wanted you. He wanted to show you what true love was, and that no girl deserved to be treated the way you were, left alone in the middle of nowhere, weeping in the pouring rain. Hearing about your past hurt him, but it also revealed your strength and resilience, which only made him love you more. He wasn't drawn to the roses and smiles you showed the world; he was captivated by the scars and bruises you tried to hide.

The more Johnny got to know you, the deeper he fell.

However, he made a conscious decision to hold back because he didn't want to become a rebound love. Instead, he wished for you to heal from the wounds of your past relationship, to move forward and see him for who he truly was, not just as a replacement for what your ex lacked.

He longed for the day when you would accept him completely, with no remains of the past clouding your judgment. So, he waited patiently, hoping for your heart to mend. Hoping for you to let go. Hoping for you to see him.

Time passed away, six months turned into a year, yet you still struggled to let go completely. Though it was getting better, the ghost of your past still lingered, haunting your thoughts and emotions.

How could you not feel shattered? Johnny was just too good for you, too kind. But when you've been hurt before, love becomes terrifying. Trying to piece things together while pretending to be okay is exhausting. It's hard to focus on anything when you're struggling to keep it together. Knowing you love someone and they love you back, yet being unable to fully embrace it because you're afraid of losing them, of getting hurt again - it's paralyzing.

And then there's the guilt. Even though your past relationship ended a year ago, the promises made still weigh heavily on your conscience. How do you reconcile having Johnny in your thoughts while someone else occupies a part of your heart? It feels unfair to him, but you can't shake the feeling.

How are you supposed to let go and move forward when your heart is still stuck in the past? People say "move on" like it's easy, it's anything but easy. It feels like an impossible task, especially when nobody seems to understand what you're going through.

Except for him. Johnny. He understands.

It's so damn difficult," you thought to yourself, feeling the weight of your emotions. Letting go seemed like the simplest solution, but in reality, it was anything but easy. As Johnny led you towards his flat, the thought lingered at the back of your mind.

He mentioned the party he was hosting with his friends at him appartment, someone got a job or something. The atmosphere inside was luxurious, yet simple. with crimson sofas exuding a regal aura in the soft golden light. The air was filled with the sweet scent of vanilla candles and the sound of champagne being poured, it was cozy.

The gathering was intimate, with only the chosen few invited. Amidst the fancy party, all you could think about was Johnny. You wanted to tell him how you felt, that you'd fallen for him too, about the guilt that shouldn't be feeling. Johnny was the best guy you'd ever met, and you couldn't just let him go because you were scared. Even though your past hasn't been great, you didn't want to hurt him because you knew he loved you too. Since the day you met, he's been there for you. And he still is, always there in every little thing. It feels like you're stuck in between, torn between your feelings for him and the uncertainty.

As Johnny left momentarily, you found yourself walking towards the balcony, away from the small talk and pretense inside, with a bottle of champagne. all you needed was a stunning view of the city's glittering skyscrapers, illuminated by the twinkling lights.

You craved peace of mind, a moment to quiet the storm raging within you. Being around Johnny, even for just an hour, had a profound effect on you, all the thoughts and insecurities on one side, and all the feelings of desire and lust, unlike anything you've ever experienced before.

There was no rush of blood and getting all hot and bothered every time your prior partner looked at you. You would never have felt this shy and nervous in his presence. Yes, there was attraction, but nothing like this, but with Johnny, it is the exact opposite. His mere presence left you weak-kneed and breathless, yearning to surrender to the intoxicating pull between you. He awakens you. He makes you want to succumb to him, give into him.

Yes, you yearn to experience the warmth of love, to be cherished and valued in return. And perhaps, deep down, you crave these feelings from Johnny, who has shown himself to be both kind and breathtakingly amazing. The way he gazes at you speaks volumes about his feelings for you.

It's confusing, isn't it? Frightening even. Because all you've ever known about Love is that it breaks and burns and ends, yet here you are, falling for Johnny despite your fears. It's a terrifying feeling, but there's something about it that makes you want to continue. Makes you want to keep dreaming. But you're afraid to confess your feelings, terrified that you'll only end up hurting Johnny in the process. It's hard to find the words, to admit to yourself, let alone to him, that you're falling for him. But despite the uncertainty and the fear, there's an urge within you, a desire to reach out and claim him for your own. All you want is to grab his face, to feel his lips against yours, and to lose yourself in the sweetness of his embrace.

Hard.

And never let him go. You've been thinking about it, about you. And him. And since, you've been moving on, you've been trying to forget and forgive and embrace and accept. You have come to a conclusion that amidst all the chaos, Johnny was the only one there. And that you have hopelessly fallen in love with him.

~~~

Hey," he says, joining you on the balcony, "you're standing alone?"

"Hey jj," you reply, meeting his gaze.

"You call me 'jj' when you're happy," he remarks, puzzled because your tone isn't cheerful.

"I guess I'm happy, sort of. It's been a while, but it feels good," you admit, looking at him standing beside you. He smiles, his eyes filled with happiness. He's genuinely pleased for you.

"That's great," he says with genuine enthusiasm. "Actually, that's fantastic."

He eyes the glass of alcohol in your hand. "Can I have that glass, though?"

That's great," he says with genuine enthusiasm. "Actually, that's fantastic."

He eyes the glass of alcohol in your hand. "Can I have that glass, though?"

"Nope, I'm having a pretty good time," you say, pulling the glass away from him. He noticed a whole bottle nearby on the floor. "I think you've had enough for the night, darling."

darling.

Even in the dim light, Johnny couldn't miss the blush spreading across your cheeks. He's skilled at noticing your reactions and knows how to tease you.

Trying to steer the conversation away from any awkwardness, you say, "So I was thinking..."

"About?" he interjects playfully, trying to provoke a response.

"Everything that's happened, you know, with my ex, and then with you," you begin, but he interrupts.

"Oh, nothing happened between us, as far as I can remember... unless..." he trails off, a mischievous glint in his eye.

"That's not what I meant," you quickly clarify.

"Okay, okay, just kidding. But I kinda wish you did mean it," he mutters under his breath, a smirk forming on his face.

You feel your thoughts becoming fuzzy as you both dance around the topic. Usually, your brain would shut down any such ideas, but tonight feels different. Instead of being repelled, you feel drawn to him, wanting something you've suppressed for so long.

Despite trying to hold back, you find yourself unable to think of anything else.

As the alcohol courses through your veins, emboldening your desires, you find yourself unable to resist the urge to ask him what has been in your mind for quite a long time, and so you ask "If I were to ask for a kiss, would you kiss me? Right here, right now?"

The intensity in his gaze heightens, his pupils dilating as his demeanor shifts, becoming more serious. "Ask me," he demands, his jaw clenched with anticipation. His eyes linger on your lips before locking onto yours, a silent plea echoing within them.

Overwhelmed by the intensity of his gaze, you turn away, feeling a rush of emotions flooding your senses. With a deep breath, you struggle to compose yourself, but before you can respond, he chuckles softly. "I knew you didn't have the nerve," he remarks, his tone teasing yet tinged with disappointment. Meeting his gaze once more, you're taken aback by his confidence. As he straightens himself and takes a sip of his drink, his words hang heavily in the air. "I don't know how much longer I can wait for you," he confesses, his voice low and filled with longing, "but if you were to ask me to fuck you right here, right now, I wouldn't even think once." With that declaration, practically deadpanned on your face, he goes inside the flat, leaving you to grapple with your miserable self.

~~~

The night after that seemed to stretch endlessly, a void you couldn't escape. Frustration and regret gnawed at your mind, You turned to more alcohol, a fleeting attempt to numb the pain within, but it only amplified the train of thoughts swirling in your head.

As you sat alone on the balcony, the chilly night air enveloped you, matching the coldness you felt inside. Time lost its meaning, slipping through your fingers as you drowned in a sea of overthinking. Every possible scenario played out in your mind like a relentless storm, each outcome more daunting than the last. What could have happened if you could have just said.

Johnny appears through the doorframe. His presence was unexpected, you thought he was mad yet oddly comforting, a reminder that you weren't completely alone in this chaotic night. "Will you spend the whole night here?" he asked, concern etched in his voice. But you were too lost in your own thoughts to fully grasp his words.

Refusing to retreat from your self-imposed exile, you remained rooted to the spot, the numbness spreading through your limbs. Yet Johnny persisted, his care evident as he gently coaxed you back inside. "It's cold. Come inside, everybody left already," he urged, worry evident in his eyes.

Too weary to resist, you allowed him to guide you indoors, his touch grounding you in reality. As he settled you into his bed, a wave of familiarity washed over you, a stark reminder of the times you'd been here before, always on the edge of leaving. You had been here countless times, yet never truly stayed. But tonight was different. Tonight, you found yourself unable to muster the strength to leave, surrendering to the comfort of his presence, if only for a fleeting moment.

As he guided you to sit on the edge of the bed, you instinctively reached out, clinging to his shirt. "Kiss me," you implored, your gaze locking with his warm brown eyes, overflowing with affection.

His response came with a gentle sigh, his concern evident in the furrow of his brow. "You're drunk," he stated softly, his voice laced with worry.

"I am, but I can still make sense of it all," you insisted, determination shining through the haze of intoxication.

"We'll talk about it in the morning, okay?" Johnny reassured, his face drawing closer to yours.

"Please," you exhaled, closing your eyes, feeling the weight of your confession pressing down on you. "I know I'm the worst person alive right now but I- I'm just afraid. Please understand. I want you, I do, but it's so scary."

"Shh, it's okay, I know," he murmured, his words a soothing balm to your troubled soul. "I know you're trying."

Foreheads pressed together, your breaths mingled, each exhalation a testament to the vulnerability you shared in that moment. "I'm sorry," you whispered, the weight of your guilt heavy on your heart.

"You don't have to be," he replied, his lips brushing against your forehead in a tender gesture of forgiveness. "Look at me."

As you met his gaze once more, his eyes filled with understanding and compassion. "Relax, okay? I'm happy that you opened up about it."

"I'm sorry," you repeated, the words a mantra of remorse.He shook his head gently, his touch comforting. "Let's try sleeping now, shall we? Don't think about it." With his reassurance enveloping you like a warm blanket, you allowed yourself to drift into the embrace of sleep, for the first time with him.

As consciousness reluctantly seeped into your foggy mind, a wave of discomfort washed over you, fueled by the repercussions of last night's poor choices. The harsh glare of morning light pierced through your eyelids, adding to the throbbing ache behind your temples.

Attempting to remove yourself from the confines of the bed proved to be a tough task, your limbs heavy with exhaustion and your head swimming with dizziness. Searching for Johnny's presence beside you, you found only an empty space, adding to the disorientation.

Succumbing to defeat, you surrendered to the comfy embrace of the mattress, sinking into its softness as you lay there, gazing blankly at the ceiling above. Dehydration gnawed at your parched throat. As you drifted in and out of consciousness, the world around you faded into a haze of half-formed thoughts and fleeting sensations. The rhythmic hum of the ceiling fan above served as a lullaby.

In the midst of this surreal feeling, fragments of memories from the night before flickered like distant stars in the night sky. Realization and what-ifs danced at the edges of your mind, their haunting presence a constant reminder of the consequences of your actions.

Yet, amidst the turmoil, there lingered a glimmer of hope, a faint whisper of possibility that perhaps, despite the mistakes of the past, redemption was still within reach. You clung to this fragile thread of optimism, a lifeline in the midst of the storm.

Minutes stretched into hours, the passage of time marked only by the shifting patterns of sunlight filtering through the curtains. And then, as if on cue, the sound of footsteps drew near, with a weary sigh, you opened your eyes to find Johnny standing in the doorway, his expression a mixture of concern and relief. "Hey, you okay?" he asked softly, you nodded sleepily.

As you reluctantly stirred from your sleep, you felt the duvet being tugged away, prompting a sleepy protest. "Erugh, let me sleep," you mumbled, trying to shield yourself from the intruding light.

But his teasing remark about your state of dress snapped you awake, and you jolted up, "You're completely naked," only to realize you were already covered. He pointed out with a playful grin, causing you to blush and scramble for cover.

However, your movements triggered a sharp pain in your head, and you winced, instinctively reaching to soothe it. Before you could fully register the discomfort, another hand joined yours, gently stroking your head. Slowly opening your eyes, you found him sitting close, his concern evident in his gaze.

"Who told you to drink that much? You puked two times," he said softly, his tone filled with worry and care. Giving in to his touch, you leaned into him, finding solace in his presence amidst the pain.

"I... may have overdone it a bit," you admitted sheepishly, feeling a mix of embarrassment and gratitude for his concern. He chuckled softly, his fingers continuing to massage your head as you relaxed against him.

"It's okay. Just drink some water and take it easy," he reassured you, his voice a soothing balm to your frazzled nerves. With a nod, you reached for the glass he held out to you

He's far too good for you. A voice at the back of your head screams at you.

"Johnny..." you say, breaking the silence that hung heavy in the room. His presence alone was enough to make your heart race, but you needed to speak your mind.

He turns to you, his gaze softening as he listens intently. "What is it?" he asks, concern lacing his words.

You take a deep breath, gathering your thoughts before continuing. "I've been thinking about..." you trail off, unsure of how to articulate the right words.

Johnny reaches out, his hand placing a strand of hair behind your ear,offering silent support. "Go on," he encourages gently.

"I'm sorry," you say, the words heavy with regret. "I know this is complicated, and i am making it even more complicated but I just don't want to hurt you." You could barely manage to say even that.

Your breath catches in your throat as his fingers trail through the loops of your hair, sending shivers down your spine. His hum reverberates through you, a sensual melody that ignites a fire deep within. But then, in an instant, his demeanor shifts, catching you off guard.

His hand tightens around your hair, pulling your head back with a swift, yet gentle force. The sudden change in his touch sends a rush of adrenaline through your veins, heightening your senses to the electrifying proximity between you.

Your eyes meet his, dark and intense, and you find yourself unable to look away. His breath, warm and fruity, fans over your face, stirring something primal within you. In that moment, you're acutely aware of every sensation, every heartbeat, as you surrender to the magnetic pull of desire that envelops you both.

"Can't you see what you do to me?"

Johnny..." you say, your voice barely above a whisper, the intensity of the moment almost overwhelming.

He pauses, his eyes locked with yours, waiting for you to continue.

"I... I didn't mean..." you stutter, struggling to find the right words as his grip on your hair loosens.

He chuckles softly, his laughter dancing in the air, easing some of the tension between you. "I know, I know," he reassures you, his tone gentle yet teasing.

"But..." you start, only to be cut off by his next words.

"You talk a lot when you're drunk," he says with a smirk, his fingers tracing light patterns along your skin.

Your cheeks flush with embarrassment, knowing he's right.

"What did I say?" you ask, trying to piece together the fragments of the night before.

His gaze softens, a hint of mischief glinting in his eyes. "That you tend to get... aroused whenever I say your name," he says, his voice low and husky, sending a shiver down your spine.

You shake your head in denial, but deep down, you know he's right.

He leans in closer, his breath warm against your skin, sending tingles of anticipation coursing through your veins.

"Johnny..." you breathe out his name, a mixture of desire and uncertainty swirling in your mind as he hovers above you, his presence consuming your senses.

"Say it," he urges, his voice low and demanding, sending a thrill through your body.

"Johnny, listen to m—" you begin, but he cuts you off with a firm command.

"Say it!" he insists, his intensity leaving no room for argument.

"I want you, for fuck's sake, I want you," you finally admit, your voice tinged with both desire and vulnerability.

Closing your eyes, you release the grip you've been holding onto, allowing yourself to surrender to the overwhelming attraction between you.

You lay back, flattening against the bed, pushing your hair away from your face to meet his gaze head-on. His eyes, dark and intense, never waver from yours, sending a flutter of nerves through your stomach.

"I want you, in every way possible, and it's no secret. I'm just afraid," you confess in a small voice, baring your soul to him.

Johnny's smile is reassuring, his touch gentle as he lays on top of you, ensuring he doesn't overwhelm you with his weight. "Don't be afraid," he whispers, his breath warm against your skin. "You'll love me just fine."

In that moment, as you lay entwined with him, all your fears melt away, replaced by a sense of warmth and comfort in his embrace. You know that no matter what lies ahead, you're ready to explore this newfound connection with him by your side.

As Johnny hovers above you, his gaze dark with desire, you feel a surge of anticipation coursing through your veins. His lips brush against yours in a teasing caress, igniting a fire that burns hot and fierce between you.

"I've been waiting for this," he murmurs, his voice low and husky with need as he trails kisses down your neck, leaving a trail of fire in his wake.

You arch into his touch, a soft moan escaping your lips as his hands roam your body, exploring every curve and contour with an expert touch that leaves you trembling with desire.

"God, you're so beautiful," he whispers, his breath hot against the skin of your neck as he takes you in, his eyes drinking in every inch of you. You feel his breath against your skin, warm and inviting, as he leans in closer, his lips brushing against yours in a feather-light kiss.

With each touch, each caress, the tension between you dissolves, replaced by an electric current of desire that pulses through your veins. His hands roam your body, mapping every curve and contour with a reverence that leaves you breathless.

You arch into his touch, a soft sigh escaping your lips as he explores every inch of your skin with a delicate touch that sets your senses ablaze. His fingers trace patterns along your spine, sending shivers of pleasure racing down your spine.

Your lips collided with his in a heated embrace, sending shockwaves of desire coursing through both of your bodies. Crashing into each other, feelings of desire over powering you both. In that moment you knew, it was gonna be a hell of a ride and you couldn't be any more excited than you are right now.

After the kiss, you both laid side by side, "By the way you didn't really say any of that." Johnny gently whispers in your ear, and you both end up laughing, cuddling.

~~~

You like it?" Johnny asks, his eyes sparkling with warmth as he watches you take a lick of the ice cream. You nod enthusiastically, a wide smile spreading across your face like a child on Christmas morning. His smile widens in response, a soft glow of happiness emanating from him. It's moments like these that make everything feel so right.

Since that unforgettable day when you poured your heart out to him, your life has been like a dream come true. Flowers, date nights, chocolates – you name it, he's made sure to fill your days with joy and love. From cozy movie nights to endless cuddles, it's like you've found the missing piece to your puzzle.

But it's not all sunshine and rainbows. Like any couple, you have your disagreements. Yet, what sets you apart is the unwavering understanding and support you both offer each other. Johnny never lets you go to bed upset, always there with reassurance and kisses to mend any hurt feelings.

He constantly reminds you that you're doing just fine, and it's true. It's not just about healing from past wounds; it's about the beautiful exchange of giving and receiving love. It's about reciprocating the care and affection you both share, knowing that the more you give, the more you receive.

In a world where it's easy to become complacent, you both choose to love each other every single day. And that, in itself, is the greatest gift of all.

You plead with puppy dog eyes, urging him to let you indulge in more ice cream because, well, why not? 'Pleeease let me have another scoop!' you whine, the anticipation of the creamy goodness making your mouth water. But alas, he declines with a chuckle, warning, 'No way! You'll catch a cold!' You pout, but secretly admire his concern."

Disappointed but not defeated, you pout and playfully stick out your bottom lip, giving Johnny your best puppy-dog eyes. "But Johnny," you protest, "I promise I'll bundle up extra warm tonight! Pretty please?"

Johnny can't help but laugh at your antics, finding your determination to get that extra scoop of ice cream utterly endearing. He shakes his head, still chuckling, and gently takes your hand in his. "As much as I love seeing that adorable pout of yours, I can't risk you getting sick, [Reader]. How about we save the ice cream for tomorrow, hmm?"

You sigh dramatically, but a mischievous glint dances in your eyes as you lean in closer to him. "Fine," you concede, "but only if you promise to share a warm blanket and snuggle with me tonight."

A grin spreads across Johnny's face as he leans in to press a soft kiss to your forehead. "Deal," he agrees, his voice filled with warmth and affection. "Anything for you, my love."

As you both leave the ice cream parlor, the cool evening air wraps around you, the gentle breeze a welcome contrast to the warmth of your intertwined hands. As you both step into the cozy cafe, the familiar scent of freshly brewed coffee fills the air, bringing back memories of the first time you met. Johnny's hand tightens around yours, his touch sending a thrill through you that's impossible to ignore.

You find a secluded booth in the corner, and as you settle in, Johnny's eyes lock with yours, a silent invitation sparking between you. "You know," he murmurs, his voice low and husky, "this place holds a lot of memories for us."

You nod, a soft smile playing on your lips. "It feels like just yesterday that we were sitting here, nervously sipping our coffees," you reply, your voice filled with affection.

Johnny leans in closer, his breath warm against your ear. "But this time," he whispers, "we don't have to be nervous." A shiver runs down your spine at his words, and you meet his gaze with a newfound sense of boldness. "No, this time," you say, your voice steady and sure, "we can just be us."

With a gentle touch, Johnny cups your face in his hands, his eyes searching yours with a depth of emotion that takes your breath away. "I like the sound of that," he murmurs, his lips hovering just inches from yours.

Before you can respond, his lips capture yours in a passionate kiss, the world around you fading away as you lose yourself in the heat of the moment. It's a dance of tongues and teeth, of whispered words and soft sighs, each touch igniting a fire that burns hotter with every passing second.

As you finally pull away, breathless and flushed, Johnny's eyes meet yours with a hunger that mirrors your own. "I never want to stop kissing you," he confesses, his voice thick with desire.

A smile tugs at your lips as you lean in to press another kiss to his, the promise of countless more moments like this hanging in the air between you.

~~~

As you sit at your desk, textbooks spread out before you and notes scattered across the surface, you're fully immersed in your study session. The material is dense, and you're determined to grasp every concept before the upcoming exam.

Just as you're deep in concentration, Johnny enters the room with a mischievous grin, his eyes lighting up at the sight of you buried in your books. Without a word, he crosses the room and leans against your desk, his presence a distraction you can't ignore.

"Hey there, studious one," he says, his voice low and playful. "Need a break?"

You look up from your books, torn between the desire to keep studying and the temptation of Johnny's irresistible charm. "I really should finish this chapter," you reply, trying to sound firm despite the flutter in your stomach at his proximity.

But Johnny has other plans. With a swift movement, he slides your textbooks aside and pulls you to your feet, his hands finding their way to your waist as he draws you close. "I think you've earned a reward for all that hard work," he murmurs, his lips dangerously close to yours.

Before you can protest, Johnny's mouth descends on yours in a fiery kiss, his tongue tracing the outline of your lips before delving deeper, igniting a fire within you that threatens to consume you both. Lost in the heat of the moment, you abandon all thoughts of studying as you melt into his embrace, the world around you fading away until there's nothing left but the two of you and the intoxicating rush of desire.

Minutes, or maybe hours, pass in a blur of tangled limbs and heated kisses, until finally, you break apart, breathless and flushed, the taste of Johnny still lingering on your lips. "Now that's what I call a study break," he says with a grin, his eyes sparkling with mischief.

You can't help but laugh, the tension of the study session now a distant memory as you bask in the warmth of Johnny's love and the thrill of his touch.

~~~

As you made your way back from college, the skies darkened, and before you knew it, a heavy downpour unleashed its fury upon you. The rain hammered down relentlessly, soaking you up and down. Despite the continuous ringing of your phone from within your backpack, the rain made it impossible to retrieve. With no umbrella in hand, you quickened your pace towards the bus stop, only to witness the last bus pulling away just as you rounded the corner. Desperation set in as you attempted to sprint after it, but the distance between you and the departing vehicle only widened. Defeated, you exhaled heavily, feeling the chill of the rain seeping into your bones. Seeking refuge at the bus stop, you huddled under its shelter, which wasn't helping much.

As you stood there, shivering and dripping, you couldn't shake the feeling of unease creeping over you. The relentless rain seemed to whisper secrets in the wind. With each passing moment, your mind raced with thoughts of your worried boyfriend waiting at home, unaware of your predicament.

As you glanced down at your phone, the screen illuminated with missed calls and frantic messages from him. Frustration bubbled within you, knowing that you were only adding to his worry by being stranded in the storm. You tried to call him back, but the signal was weak, and the connection kept cutting out. Time seemed to stretch endlessly as you waited for the next bus, the minutes ticking by like hours.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the bus appeared on the horizon, its headlights piercing through the darkness like a beacon of hope. With a sigh of relief, you boarded the bus, grateful for the warmth and safety it offered. And soon you were standing in front of his appointment door.

As the bus finally pulled up to a stop, you hurriedly disembarked, your heart pounding with a mix of fear and relief. You practically sprinted the rest of the way home, the rain still coming down in sheets, soaking you to the bone.

Finally, you arrived at the doorstep of your apartment, soaked and shivering. With trembling hands, you fumbled for your keys, desperate to be inside the safety of your home. But before you could even insert the key into the lock, the door swung open, revealing a worried and furious Johnny.

"Where have you been?!" he exclaimed, his voice laced with anger and concern. "I've been trying to call you for hours! Do you have any idea how worried I've been?"

"I-I'm so sorry, Johnny," you stammered, tears mixing with the rain on your cheeks. "I got caught in the storm, and I missed the bus, and...and I couldn't get through to you. I'm so sorry."

Johnny's expression softened as he took in your trembling form, his anger melting away in an instant. Without a word, he pulled you into a tight embrace, wrapping his arms around you protectively. "I'm just glad you're safe," he murmured, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. "I was so worried about you. Let's get you inside and warm you up, okay?"

You nod, feeling the weight of your backpack against the wall as you follow Johnny into the bedroom. With a quick movement, you pull your hair up, hoping to keep it from sticking to your clothes. Sensing his hands on your torso, you inhale sharply as they glide around to the front, undoing the button of your jeans. Anticipation mounts as he pulls them down, and then he sits, planting kisses on your damp thigh, eliciting a dissatisfied moan from you.

In a swift motion, your undies join the jeans on the floor. "Nice butt," he remarks, drawing a rhetorical look from you. Stepping closer, he removes the t-shirt clinging uncomfortably to your skin, and with it, your bra disappears too. "Beautiful as always," he murmurs, enveloping you in a warm towel and pulling you close, his lips finding your neck, leaving their mark.

"Johnny," you sigh as his hands slip under the towel, teasingly moving between your legs, knowing just where to stop, leaving you breathless. "I'll be right back, change into dry clothes, okay?" he says, his voice a tantalizing promise hanging in the air.

He returned with a steaming mug of tea, fragrant steam curling upwards in the air. He handed it to you with a tender smile, the warmth of the mug seeping into your chilled fingers.

"Here, drink this," he said softly, his voice soothing.. "It'll help warm you up."

"I only need you to warm me up."

"Come here then." He motions you to sit with him in the bed he made, warm and cozy. As you lay there in Johnny's arms, the intimacy of the moment enveloping you like a warm embrace, you couldn't help but feel a surge of emotion welling up inside you.

"Johnny," you murmured softly, your voice barely above a whisper, "I'm so sorry for worrying you. I never meant to cause you so much distress."

Johnny's arms tightened around you, pulling you even closer to him as he pressed a tender kiss to your forehead. "It's okay, sweetheart," he whispered back, his voice filled with reassurance. "I was just so scared when I couldn't reach you. All I could think about was making sure you were safe."

You buried your face against his chest, the steady rhythm of his heartbeat a soothing lullaby against your ear. "I promise I'll be more careful from now on," you vowed, your words muffled against his skin. "I never want to put you through that kind of worry again."

Johnny tilted your chin up gently, his eyes locking with yours in a tender gaze. "I know you will," he said softly, his thumb brushing away the tears that had pooled in your eyes. "And I'll always be here for you, no matter what."

With a contented sigh, you snuggled closer to him, reveling in the warmth and comfort of his embrace. Johnny's fingers danced along the buttons of your blouse, a spark of desire ignited between you, fueling the passion that simmered just beneath the surface.

"How about we finish what we started earlier?"

Your heart raced at his words, the anticipation building with every breath. With a smile, you nodded in agreement, your own desire mirrored in your eyes as you leaned in to meet his lips in a fiery kiss.

The heat between you intensified quickly, passion igniting like a wildfire as your bodies melded together in a tangle of desire. Teeth clashed against each other, tongues danced in a feverish rhythm, and hands roamed eagerly, seeking out every inch of skin they could find.

With a swift movement, you straddled Johnny, taking control of the moment as you traced a path of kisses down his neck, relishing in the soft gasps and low growls that escaped his lips. As his shirt fell away, revealing his beautifully toned body beneath, you couldn't help but admire the sight before you, feeling a surge of desire coursing through your veins.

Too shy to say anything, you let your actions speak for you. Lingering on his nipples, you teased and tantalized, eliciting soft moans of pleasure from Johnny's lips. With each flick of your tongue and gentle nip of your teeth, the tension between you grew, pushing you both closer and closer to the edge of desire.

But you weren't done yet. With a mischievous glint in your eye, you continued your exploration, trailing kisses and caresses down Johnny's torso until you reached the waistband of his jeans. With practiced hands, you teased and toyed with him through the fabric, making him harder with every stroke, relishing in the way he squirmed beneath your touch.

As his pleasured groans filled the air, you couldn't resist escalating your actions, eagerly sliding his pants down while he sat up, fixated on your every move. Locking eyes with him, you took him into your mouth, teasingly tracing the tip with your tongue, prompting a soft curse from his lips. Pulling back, you continued to lavish attention on him, savoring every moment as you licked his length, stealing glances up at him. "Enjoying yourself?" you teased, to which he responded with an enthusiastic nod.

Returning to him, you gradually took more of him into your mouth, relishing in the way his hands urged you on, guiding you further down. He pulled you up for a heated kiss, expressing his desire to explore your taste. As his lips trailed down your neck, he urged you to sit on his face, igniting nerves and excitement within you. With his encouragement, you straddled his eager mouth, blushing at his sweet words as his lips planted kisses on your thighs.

Feeling his hands on your hips, he drew you closer, his tongue eagerly finding your clit, eliciting moans of pleasure from you. As his hands explored your body, adding to your arousal, you couldn't help but cry out in bliss as he skillfully pleasured you,

As your pleasure surged, you couldn't contain your cries, feeling the intensity of his actions. "Oh, fuck," escaped your lips as he intensified his efforts, his mouth and tongue working fervently on your clit. His suction grew stronger, his tongue moving with increasing speed, drawing out guttural moans from you. "Oh my god," you exclaimed as the waves of your orgasm crashed over you, "fuck," you moaned as he persisted in his ministrations.

His hands gripping your hips, pulling you closer, he delved deeper into your core, his touch sending shivers down your spine. "Oh god, don't stop," you gasped, your breath ragged as you requested his fingers. With a calm demeanor, he complied, easing his fingers into you, eliciting a blissful moan from your lips. As he continued to pleasure you, his fingers moving rhythmically inside you, your cries of ecstasy filled the room.

"Oh my god," you moaned aloud as he momentarily paused, only to reposition himself behind you. Bending you slightly, he inserted two fingers, drawing out a soft, pleasurable moan from you. With relentless determination, he showed no mercy, driving you towards another peak of pleasure. The sound of slick noises filled the air as his fingers worked expertly within you, pushing your head gently into the headboard to ensure your stability as you surrendered to his touch.

As his hand pressed you down onto his fingers, a fervent moan escaped your lips, the sensation overwhelming you. "Oh my god," you cried out as he intensified his movements, driving you wild with desire. With increasing speed and force, his fingers plunged into you, eliciting a chorus of ecstatic moans from your lips.

Suddenly, he withdrew his fingers, his command clear. "Turn around," he instructed, guiding you gently as you complied, meeting his intense gaze. Enveloped in his embrace, you shared a deep, passionate kiss, his desire evident in his words as he broke the connection. "I want to fuck you," he declared, and you eagerly nodded in agreement, urgency coursing through your veins.

Pushed onto the bed, your legs spread wide, you watched as he knelt between them, his eyes fixated on your dripping arousal. His finger traced circles on your swollen clit, then slipped inside you, claiming you as his own. "Mine," he whispered, his gaze never wavering from yours, and you nodded in submission, a smile playing on your lips. "I'm yours," you affirmed, anticipation building in the air.

With a hungry look, he licked his lips before slowly entering you with his cock, causing you to gasp in ecstasy. "Oh my god," you moaned loudly as he began to move within you, the intensity of his thrusts driving you to the brink of pleasure.

As he increased the pace, driving into you with fervent desire, your cries of ecstasy filled the room. "Oh my god," you moaned loudly as he relentlessly fucked you, each thrust pushing you closer to the edge. Leaning down, he captured your lips in a passionate kiss, his declaration of love mingling with the sounds of your pleasure. "I love you," he murmured against your lips, his words igniting a fire within you.

Wrapping your legs around his waist, you reciprocated his declaration, your voice filled with desire. "I love you too," you confessed as he continued to ravish you with his relentless thrusts. With a swift motion, he withdrew from you, flipping you onto your stomach. "Get on all fours," he commanded, assisting you into position.

Meeting his gaze over your shoulder, you were met with a declaration of your beauty, sending shivers down your spine. As he entered you from behind, a rush of anticipation flooded your senses. His movements became more intense, driving into you harder and faster, eliciting moans of pleasure from your lips. "Oh my god," you cried out, overwhelmed by the sensations coursing through your body.

Feeling his hand reach around to play with your clit, a surge of pleasure washed over you, intensifying the pleasure building within. "Oh my god," you moaned again, lost in the ecstasy of his touch. With each deep thrust, you felt yourself teetering on the edge, your body aching for release.

As he took control, holding both your hands behind your back, you surrendered to him completely. Your petite frame under his dominance, your face buried into the sheets muffling the sounds of pleasure escaping your lips. Sensing his impending release, you knew you were on the brink of ecstasy.

With a few final, deep thrusts, you both succumbed to the ecstasy, waves of pleasure washing over you in a euphoric crescendo. As he pulled out, licking you clean, you whimpered from the overstimulation, your body trembling with aftershocks of pleasure.

a sense of blissful exhaustion washed over you both. Lying tangled together under the sheet, hearts racing and skin still tingling from the intensity of your lovemaking. As you caught your breath, he peppered soft kisses along your neck and shoulders, his touch gentle and tender. "You're incredible," he whispered, his voice filled with adoration as he caressed your cheek. You smiled up at him. In his arms, you feel safe and cherished, the weight of the world melting away as sleep begins to claim you. Drifting off with the rhythmic beat of his heart as your lullaby, you rest easy knowing that you are safe. And you finally know, what love actually feels like

~~~

hope you liked it. umh? idk tried, if you want to request anything, please do. (it'll take forever but ill respond)

please check out other works m.list

and enjoy, have a good day, night~

[velnoni]

100% down with demi Ford and interested in relationship headcanons!

Ford x Reader Relationship Headcanons

I'm so happy for this ask, I haven't received any in ages. Also thank you for agreeing, here ya go! This is gonna be a long one.

He's a very busy fella, catching up on old and creating new experiments after saving the world with his family. Would like to say you guys met as acquaintances when he picks up a job at the local college in Gravity Falls. He doesn't like freeloading off of Stan even though it was originally his home.

Being real here, the last thing on his mind is a relationship, let alone a romantic one. It's not that he's against one, but there is so much he missed out on after being trapped in portal.

With the kids returning home, Ford & Stan trying to fix their relationship, it'll dawn upon him that while Gravity Falls feels like home, it doesn't at the same time. Just like when he first arrived, he'll feel isolated and lonely, a figment of the past.

Having someone to speak to, even a work buddy, would be a healthy step for his to explore relationships outside the family. You two having the same lunch breaks and holding up small conversations help ease away the trepidation in his stomach. He's very apprehensive towards you at first but if you show interest in his work, he'll open up a bit.

Will ask you for help with modern technology. Some of his students gripe with him for not using his email. He appreciates your help and hopes not to be a burden. You're impressed by his use of vocabulary and learn new words every week.

Goes without saying, but he has mountains of trust issues. Trouble sleeping, eating, etc can affect his mood, so sometimes you might have pity on him and bring him something sweet to drink/munch on. A silent gesture, and at first, he wonders what your game is. "Can't help a friend?" After that ensues the endless nights of wondering if you two truly are friends, if this is something worth investing in. He never excelled in the social department as much as he hated to admit it and will go to Stan about it. Might even ask the kids on the next face time for advice.

He's nervous at the idea of having a friend, the last time he was used and it nearly cost the life of humanity. Never again. Stan suggested the first step to hanging out outside work is to ask you to go drinking. Ford was pessimistic at first but Stan's logic didn't sound too bad (for once) and after he asks you and you accept it became the occasional thing to go drinking at a pub where the beer is bad and finger food was edible enough.

He finds himself looking forward to hanging with you outside work, the two of you indulging your day to day and past stories. You could always tell he was hiding something or perhaps hesitant about the nature of his past...but eventually he shows you the abnormalities of Gravity Falls. At first you were bewildered at the reality, but as time passed you would indulge with Ford in his studies. Sometimes planning hikes on the weekend or setting up traps to catch gnomes and find out what's under their hat. He wasn't keen on the idea of taking you to more dangerous expeditions.

You enjoyed watching old series with him. According to Ford he had a lot of media to catch up on, sometimes Stan would keep you two company. Was upset to find out Micheal Jackson passed away.

Of course you'll meet Stan, who takes to shooting his horrible jokes at you in attempts to make you laugh. It works and Ford questions your sanity. The dynamic between you three is refreshing.

He was visiting your home with a gift of chocolate and his favorite book of the month, you couldn't help but wonder what the occasion was. When Ford tells you about his plans to sail with his brother over lost time, he bit his lip. "The way you talk about Stan is like you haven't see him in forever." That elected silence from him before Ford sighs. "It's a long story." You assure him you have all the time in world. And that's when he tells you everything. There were moments of long silence when certain things became too rough to speak on but you had patience.

In the end, the two of you sat in your living room, Ford with a solemn expression on his face and his eyes distant. As you digested all the info you were given you asked if you could hug him. He was surprised but consented. He didn't realize how much he needed it.

"Do you miss him?" Ford looks at you and then at the TV. It was a long time before he answered. "I miss the person I thought he was. I thought he was my friend." You know, you know that very well and gave his shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "I'll never let someone take advantage of me again." You were proud of him.

Funds from his job at the college and the Mystery Shack helped in the creation of the Stan O' War II. It was bittersweet seeing Ford and his brother off, asking him to write to you when he could. He promised and to that you smiled. He found himself fond of that smile. Not perfect, not happy or sad, but keen on the acceptance of reality.

You get to see his expression when you gift both Stanley and him echo flowers. You explained you did your own research and thought these as perfect gifts. These flowers could repeat any sound around them and they glowed a beautiful shade of cyan blue at night.

It wasn't often Ford wore his emotions on his sleeve but he couldn't help but become teary eyed much like his brother who was feigning dust in his eyes. It had been so long since anyone was so...nice to him. He felt like he didn't deserve it sometimes.

You two become pen pals as he and Stan sail the world and he won't consider romantic feelings unless Stan asks him one day.

If you two invest in a romantic relationship it would be after they return from sailing the world and it would be extremely slow. But you're both willing.

That's the end of this headcanon! If you want more of a romantic take, asks are always open! Reblogs & likes are always appreciated!

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FROM BILLIE EILISH'S HIT ME HARD AND SOFT *  assorted lines from the album, some slightly adapted, adjust as necessary

baby, i think you were made for me.

i wish you the best for the rest of your life.

i need to confess, i told you a lie.

you were the love of my life.

i can't fall in love with you.

i see the way you want me.

i gotta be careful, gotta watch what i say.

god, i hope it all goes away.

did i break your heart?

you're just so sweet.

i don't need to breathe when you look at me.

keep it brief.

you seem so paranoid.

if this is how i die, that's all right.

open up the door for me.

i just want you to touch me.

i've never paid this much attention to you, ever.

i want you to stay.

i'll love you 'til the day i die.

i want you to see how you look to me.

you're so full of shit.

if you go, i'm going too.

we should stick together.

did you take my love away from me?

i never did you wrong.

fell in love for the first time with a friend.

it's a good time.

you told me it was war.

if it's forever, it's even better.

i don't know what i'm crying for.

call me when you're there.

i bought you something rare.

it's a craving, not a crush.

people say i look happy.

the old me is still me and maybe the real me.

i think she's pretty.

can you open up the door?

am i acting my age now?

i'll run a shower for you like you want.

if i'm allowed, i'll help you take them off.

bring that over here.

i need to be alone now, i'm taking a break.

am i already on the way out?

when i step off the stage, i'm a bird in a cage.

you said i was your secret.

the internet is hungry for the meanest kind of funny.

do you still cry?

i loved you for so long.

i could eat that girl for lunch.

tastes like she might be the one.

i don't know why i called.

i don't know you at all.

i could never get enough.

you need a seat? i'll volunteer.

i'm interested in more than just being your friend.

do you know how to bend?

when i come back around, will i know what to say?

there's a part of me that recognizes you.

do you feel it, too?

when you told me it was serious, were you serious?

they tell me it's all been a trap.

no, don't say that.

did i waste your time?

i tried to be there for you.

you said you'd never fall in love again because of me.

i love you, don't act so surprised.

things fall apart and time breaks your heart.

i wasn't there, but i know.

you don't need to remind me.

i should put it all behind me, shouldn't i?

did i cross the line?

good things don't last.

life moves so fast.

every time you touch me, i just wonder how she felt.

i know you didn't mean to hurt me, so i kept it to myself.

i'm trying my best to keep you satisfied.

you don't wanna know how alone i've been.

we don't have to fight when it's not worth fighting for.

you don't wanna know what i would've done.

i loved you and i still do.

just wanted passion from you.

it's not my fault, i did what i could.

you made it so hard like i knew you would.

after i left, it was obvious.

we're so glad it's over now.

say you miss me.

don't be afraid of me.

please don't call the cops.

bet i could change your life.

i tried to save you, but i failed.

i hope you'll read it this time.

i left a calling card so they would know that it was me.

i memorized your number.

if something happens to him, you can bet that it was me.

i'd like to mean it when i say i'm over you.

i thought we were the same.

he never learned to sympathize with anyone.

i don't blame you, but i can't change you.

it's over now.

[sharksnshakes]

New Perspective- Leon Kennedy

After losing a bet with friend and fellow DSO agent Leon Kennedy, he takes you for a ride on his motorcycle. Unforeseen consequences include windburn, watery eyes, and maybe developing a crush on him. Maybe.

AN; so i'm back with another installation of bestie leon wanting to be more than besties. you can read as a continuation of this one, anyways post-re2 leon is still on the brain and likely will be forever

Wordcount; 1.1k

TW; mentions of a potential motorcycle crash, mildly suggestive

Never again are you making a bet with Leon Kennedy.

"What were the terms again? Five minutes?" He asks, a shit eating grin on his face.

You speak through gritted teeth. "Yeah. Five."

Leon's grin widens.

"Shut up," you say halfheartedly, warily glancing down at the motorcycle you're both perched on.

"Didn't say anything, sweetheart."

You roll your eyes and zip your jacket up.

You're not sure how Leon's bike is supposed to safely carry you at all, let alone through busy downtown streets, without throwing one of you off or blowing up or spinning out of control or something. Suffice to say, you're not a fan of motorcycles--Leon knew that when you'd made the bet, and you'd only agreed because you'd been so certain that you'd win. Why else risk life and limb on the back of his Ducati?

That was the thing about Leon Kennedy and bets, though, because you've come to realize that he's got a way of winning regardless of how the odds are stacked. It's great for field work, but it's also a massive pain in your ass, because (news flash) you lost and now you'll have to endure a five minute ride on his death trap of a motorcycle.

"Let's get it over with," you sigh, looping your arms around his waist. The engine purrs beneath you, sending a shudder through your body.

"Y'know," he muses, and you can hear the grin in his voice, "I bet I could do a wheelie."

You laugh, you hope he doesn't feel the slight tremble in your hands, you hope he can't hear the nervous twinge to your voice. "Absolutely fucking not."

He drives slowly through the parking garage. Most DSO staff have already left for the night, and it's probably better that way, because the last thing the two of you need is for a hotshot supervisor to call you out on your antics. Meaning Hunnigan. Because if Hunnigan saw that neither of you were working on the literal mounds of paperwork gracing your desks, she'd probably hit you with a Jeep.

"Might wanna hold on tighter than that," Leon says offhandedly, revving the engine as you approach the street entrance.

"I'm not your backpack, Kennedy."

He chuckles. "Didn't think you'd know the lingo."

"You know that nobody says 'lingo' anymore, right? This is why Claire says you sound like an old man."

"Well, suit yourself," he shrugs, and suddenly you're rocketing into traffic.

You curse violently, digging your fingers into Leon's sides hard enough to bruise. You swear you feel him laughing, but you can't hear a damn thing over the engine and you're more focused on not falling into oncoming traffic.

"Fuck you, Kennedy," you mumble against his leather jacket, your eyes tightly shut.

The agent banks around a turn and you just barely hold back another string of curses. As his body shifts in the seat, you can feel the muscles in his sides stretch and shift and move beneath your fingers, and, wow, he's built, and now your cheeks are pricking with heat. You try not to think about it.

"You okay back there?" Leon calls, bringing the bike to a slow stop at a red light.

"Haven't decided yet?"

"Well, lucky for you, we're at-" he stops, glancing quickly at his watch. "-The two minute mark. Only three to go."

"Technically," you say, peeling yourself off of his back, "It's already been five, if you factor in the drive from the parking garage. So I say we head back."

He casts a glance over his shoulder at you, a smile playing across his lips. "That wasn't the deal, sweetheart."

"Would you quit with the 'sweetheart'?"

"You'd prefer 'backpack', then?"

"I'd prefer nothing, actually," you tease back, even though a tiny voice in your head riots at the thought. This banter with Leon is nothing new. You go back and forth like this in the office, on jobs, whenever, but perched on the back of Leon's bike has you feeling like you've crossed a line with the teasing somehow, like maybe he's actually flirting with you and maybe you're not actually minding it.

"Yeah, well..." The light changes to green. "Nevermind. Hang on, yeah?"

This time, you're feeling brave enough to divert some of your attention from clinging to Leon like your life depends on it, and instead you glance to the sides and take in the bustling downtown scene around you.

The sun's just barely set, casting a dusky haze over the streets. Pedestrians clog the sidewalk, passing through pools of golden lamp-post light; some duck into stores, some leave their apartments, some walk their dogs. You pass a restaurant with outdoor seating, a bookstore, a bank, and you've seen all of these places before on your daily commute, but the back of Leon's motorcycle is affording you a new perspective.

You turn your head to look at the other side of the street and catch a waft of Leon's cologne in the process. It's faint, but distinctly him. It's enough to bring the tiny voice in the back of your head to center stage, where it drenches the situation in rosy colors and 'what if's and 'sweethearts', grabbing you by the shoulders and practically injecting fantasized scenarios into your head. Everything from grocery shopping to painting your living room to getting in bed--

Oh, fuck, are you being a creep?

"Just another minute!" Leon shouts.

You nod against his back and swallow with a dry mouth. Your cheeks are flushed, you can feel it, and you hope you'll be able to play it off as windburn. The last minute of your ride is spent not unlike the first: with eyes slammed shut, ignoring Leon's heartbeat at your chest and ignoring the way your own heart whispers that there's more to be had here than just a friendship.

When Leon finally parks the bike in the garage and cuts the engine, your chest unclenches. Your five minutes are over and you are never getting on a motorcycle again.

The blond helps you off, looking far too amused.

"So, sweetheart... you liked the ride, yeah?" He raises his brows at you suggestively, but it's so exaggerated that you're positive he's just doing this on purpose.

You still nearly choke on your spit.

All the way back to the office, the two of you go back and forth over whether the Ducati's evil and dangerous and a horrible investment. He's laughing, insisting it isn't necessarily deadly, and you keep laughing incredulously and saying that's not a strong argument. Things feel normal again, and you've effectively written off the tiny voice in the back of your head as a bizarre, anxiety-induced response to your first and last ride on a motorcycle.

But his hand lingers on your shoulder for a little too long when you say you're heading out for the night, and after the rapid-fire scenarios that flashed through your head on that goddamned bike, you're not so sure you got rid of that tiny voice after all.

[enkvyu]

3:19pm — gojo satoru;

"you have to be out of your mind!"

gojo only smiles in response. "now, now, it's best if you calm down." he gestures for you to lower your volume but the action is only seen as a taunt in your eyes. "if you listen to me, you'll find that i'm actually very sane."

the two of you stand alone in a classroom following the chime of a bell, your students having rushed out before you could say your last few words. when your door had reopened, you were surprised to find gojo seeking you out for a favour, and even more surprised as four words tumbled out from his lips and into your ears.

"gojo, stop joking around! you want me to, to, i can't do that!" you stammer around the topic, hoping to dance around it forever. you're aware of the heat in your cheeks but you can only pray that he takes it as disgust, rather than being flustered.

despite your protest, gojo remains unphased, still calming you down like you were a wild animal. his smile never wavers as if your reaction brought him great entertainment, and you didn't doubt that it did.

sighing, you catch your head in your hands. "say it again."

"calm down?"

"no, your favour. i think i heard it wrong."

"go out with me?"

your fury comes back tenfold at his careless attitude. you had never imagined that your first confession would be from your stupid co-worker that you'd rather be dead than caught dating. his sickening sweet smile, the way in which he believed he could bat his eyes and everything would go his way, the fact that he was probably right, everything about gojo satoru was enough to drive you mad.

finally, after quelling your anger, you turn around and leave him unharmed. "where's shoko?" you ask instead.

"where are you going?"

"to shoko's." you say, passing him to reach the door closest to you. "i think i need a drink."

"but you haven't answered yet!" his arm traps you from leaving the room, palm holding down the door, his presence overbearing behind you.

you narrow your eyes at the door in front of you. "what are you doing?"

"waiting for your response? don't just leave a guy hanging, that's too cruel."

you mumble something incoherent about playing with someone else's feelings as being cruel, but you bite it back. most of your brain power was occupied with ignoring the fact that his chest was hovering just a few moments from your back, and if, say, you were to lean back in the slightest, you would be met with him.

you turn around to face him, meeting his eyes through his blindfold. "no." you answer. you find some joy in seeing his expression fall. "now can you let me leave? you're seriously pissing me off."

despite the fabric, you swear you can see him blink. he tilts his head in question for a few seconds before speaking. "i don’t like that answer, it’s wrong. want to give it another shot?"

you flare up again. "there's no right answer to a confession!"

gojo smirks. "of course there is! rejection is a wrong answer especially if the person who's asking is me."

true, you were sure that gojo had never experienced any type of rejection in his life. you were pleased to be his first dose.

“well, there’s a first time for everything and i’d be happy to be the one teaching you that lesson.”

gojo studies you. “why are you so mad? don’t tell me you’re the romantic kind. would you say yes if i came back with a bouquet of flowers and some chocolate?”

“gojo, fuck you—”

the rest of your insult dies in a sudden bang, and you turn your head just in time to catch another door further down the wall of the classroom being slammed open. pink hair peaks around the door frame before gojo steps in front of you, effectively blocking your view.

"hey!" you say in protest, just as the newcomer speaks, drowning out your voice.

"gojo!" itadori’s words dies on his tongue as he faces his teacher standing in an awkward position, trapping some person in his arms. his brain short circuits as he wonders, is his teacher seriously flirting with someone in the classroom right now? oh god, this is so embarrassing. 

"yuuji." gojo says pleasantly, just as two other heads poke around the frame, effectively freezing straight after. "megumi and nobara. what are you guys doing here?" the question seemed normal enough, but looking up, you could make out a vein on his jaw.

megumi looks between gojo and the hidden woman. he only looks once, but its enough for him to gather the picture. "bye." he says calmly, and turns to leave the room, nobara following behind with red cheeks and glancing away, less calm but with similar good intentions.

yuuji stands alone.

until nobara comes back, reaching over and drags him out the door. "sorry!" she squeaks, and the door slams behind him.

a silence settles over the pair. gojo sighs to himself, looking down at you only to find you giggling to yourself.

"what's so funny?" he asks.

"they totally think you’re hitting up someone in their classroom. oh my god, i am so embarrassed for you." you squeal playfully behind your fingers. “their respect for you has definitely dropped to hell at this point.”

"you’re awfully calm considering that this whole affair includes you."

"they wouldn't believe you." you defend. “do you seriously think anyone would pair us together as couple? one playing around during school time, no less? maybe you, but definitely not me.”

gojo raises an eyebrow at that, what part of him doesn't seem to fit with you for you to say that, and leans marginally closer as if to win you over. "you can't stop breaking my heart like this."

"i can and i will. now can you please get off of me before more people see? if any rumors spread i am so killing you."

he releases you reluctantly and watches as you make a show of dusting yourself off. he notes the way you didn't even seem flustered, and blames the fact that you were used to his antics. sighing, he reaches into his pocket for his last resort.

"okay, okay, i'll reveal myself." that gets your attention. you look over, curious, and ignore the fact that he was sulking.

"what?"

pulling out two pieces of colorful paper, he waves it in your direction. "i won two tickets for free entry into a carnival. if we go as a couple, we can get free food." 

your emotions drain from your face. "this is what this was all about? you asked me out just to get free food?"

gojo steps forward again and interlaces your hands with his. "please?" he whines.

you grimace and pull away, breaking away to shake his gross germs off your hands. "if you said that from the start, i would have said yes, idiot! why’d you have to go and make things weird?" still, you find it in you to smile. "to think you would have just broken up with me after that, anyway."

his head perks up at your last words. this time, he is the one to ask. "what?"

“nothing.” you slide open the door and spare him a glance. “you promise there’s free food, right? then let’s meet up after class and head over. i’m warning you though, gojo satoru, you better not be playing with me.”

you close the door behind you and leave him.

gojo watches you go and sighs into the empty classroom. running a hand through his hair, he readjusts his blindfold and pockets the two tickets, pocketing his runaway feelings too, as they threaten to beat against his ribcage and chase after you, hoping to tell you the truth. but it’s impossible, gojo worries he’ll lose another friend, so he shuts his mouth for once and leaves the room, his traitorous heart looking forward to when he’ll get off work.

[brucewaynehater101]

ok so this Tim's stuck in B's body

He made sure he was alone in a batcave, he knew he was alone. he didn't want to lose it, and yet, here he was. it's been too much. burying his own body. dealing with never seeing, or, at least, interacting with his friends ever again. becoming a father to his siblings, to Damian, which probably was already way too much. so he sat there. alone. going through it, because in the evening there was supposed to be a gala, and he would have to play Brucie, the role he genuinely hated.

He was alone, he didn't account for someone being there.

"Tim," Dick said softly, and it took everything from Tim to not whip around.

"He is dead, you need to accept it," he said, now grateful for Bruce's gruff voice. Hating that it sounds so deep inside of him.

"I've been around Bruce for twenty years," Dick leant on the Batcomputer table. He was in his civilian attire, "Do you really think I wouldn't notice?" there was a soft smile on his lips, and Tim felt, like he wanted to cry. He didn't.

Maybe he should keep a charade. Keep acting like he's Bruce.

"And even if I'm mistaken," he said, looking away towards the entrance to the mansion. "I"m always willing to give you a hand in case everything is too overwhelming after his death."

Tim didn't feel better, he only could go through his actions in panic, thinking what exactly set Dick off, he needed to fix it, to keep pretending he's Bruce, that's the only way.

"So if you can't deal with the whole plate, I'll help you. I'm just from Damian's teacher-parent meeting, by the way," Tim forgot, Bruce forgot, oh gosh, he forgot. "They still have my phone as their first contact," Dick huffed, like it was funny, like it wasn't a failure on Bruce's - Tim's? - part. "And I can go out as a Bat if you don't feel like it."

"You hate it though," Tim said, it wasn't something Bruce would say.

"You hate it more, baby bird," Dick said and pushed himself off the table. "If anything, I'll get ready for today's gala, I'll tell everyone you don't feel well."

Tim wanted to say something, he needed to say something, but when he turned around Dick wasn't there.

That was probably the worst time to get his hallucinations back, wasn't it.

(let's not make it that angsty and just have it as Dick actually came, but Tim dissociated for awhile, and thought Dick disappeared into the thin air)

Here's one(?) of the posts referencing this AU!

This ask focuses on the premise that Bruce and Tim switch bodies, don't tell anyone, and then Bruce dies in Tim's body forever trapping Tim in Bruce's body (while no one else knows).

This is magnificent, my friend. A beautiful addition.

I like making Tim suffer through his problems alone, but you are absolutely correct.

Out of all of the batkids, Dick *would* know Bruce best (unless it's Bruce *about* Dick). It makes perfect sense for him to notice that Bruce isn't acting like Bruce would.

There are reasons he wouldn't notice (he's busy, out of town, distracted, Tim planned for that, or Dick is grieving/spiraling), but it's more likely that Dick would notice than not.

Also, can you imagine the conversations they'd have? The debates? Is it better to let their family members know that *Tim* is inhibiting Bruce's body or to let them grieve Tim instead? Just Dick and Tim constantly fighting about what's best

[Including a very painful remark from Dick about how Tim is turning into Bruce because the younger one refuses to let anyone else know]

Anyways, this could result in Dick supporting Tim and being there for him.

On the other hand, here's some angst ideas instead:

Tim starts hallucinating more to deal with his loss of identity meaning that Dick was just a hallucination (and soon Tim starts seeing both himself and Bruce haunting him)

Dick knows that whoever is wearing his dad's face *isn't* Bruce, but he doesn't realize it's Tim (especially because Tim is "dead" and Bruce is "missing").

When Bruce dies in Tim's body, Bruce's soul returns to his body but Tim stays stuck in there as well :D

When Tim's body dies, Bruce's body starts to slowly deteriorate without Bruce's soul

I think that's enough angst for now :)

[kolyubov]

Say your French goodbye

✧ pairing. pm!dazai x gn!reader

✧ word count. 1k

✧ contents. angst? petnames (sweets, darling), ooc pm!dazai.

✧ author's note. hai :3 this may be written kinda weird because i'm experimenting with my writing !! hopefully it's still enjoyable <3

Dazai wishes to enjoy this moment; you lying on top of him with his arms wrapped around your form, breathing slowly against his chest, your eyelashes resting against your soft cheeks, your lips parted just slightly— he's holding back from just grabbing your face and pampering you with kisses, aching to feel that softness against his lips.

But he can't. He can't even let himself enjoy your presence, trying to warm his whole being; his soul.

It's wrong.

He knows he shouldn't be this attached to someone.

When he lets his guard down, allowing himself to enjoy the company of another human, life takes them away from his path one way or another.

It's always been like that.

—

Your couch feels much more comfortable than his bed, naturally, and your apartment seems too colorful for his eyes in comparison to the cold steel walls of the container where he “lives”.

He wonders what you'll think if you ever find out about his questionable lifestyle.

“Osamu…”

Dazai's attention is almost immediately back to you, watching as you snuggle and rub your cheek against his chest with your eyes still closed. The way his name sounds coming from your lips has his heart skipping a beat… He’s ashamed you’ll feel how pathetically it beats for the sound of your voice alone.

“Something's wrong?” He whispered, not wanting to break the small moment of peace for you. His fingers slowly ran through your hair, twirling it a little at the ends. “Ready to go to bed, darl’?”

His uncovered eye was hard on you, carefully analyzing your body language for any indication that you felt uncomfortable.

“You're pretty silent… Is something wrong?” You ask, and Dazai doesn't answer your question, only letting his head fall back against one of your couch's pillows; his lips part for a moment, and just as he is about to speak, he closes them again.

All of this is wrong…

He knows someday you'll be ripped off his life, he can't avoid that fate that awaits him, but Dazai is more afraid of you ending up hurt because of his fault. Considering his position as an executive of the Port Mafia, many could use you in order to threaten him.

For your own good, he should let you live a quiet life.

Dazai places his hands on your waist, firmly pushing you off him to lie on his side instead, “Sweets, it's kinda late. Why don't you go to sleep, yeah?”

When he briefly glanced at your expression, you were facing him with a pout on those lips that he couldn't take his eyes away from.

“Why don't you stay? You can sleep here, on the couch, or if you're comfortable enough, maybe in my bed!” There was no hidden meaning behind those words, you really wished for him to take a rest for once, “We can even have a slumber party!”

“Ehhh… I don't have any pajamas and sleeping in a suit is…” He trails off as your hand reaches out for his arm, but he’s already pulling away and sitting on the edge of the couch, not facing you.

“I'll lend you my clothes! I have some oversized pieces that could fit you.”

Dazai rolled his eyes, amused by your attempts to make him stay. He didn’t want to keep inventing more excuses in order to avoid staying, but knowing how stubborn you were, being honest won't work either— If anything, it'll be much harder for him to leave that way.

When he was just about to get up, ready to leave and maybe disappear forever before fucking up your life, your arms wrapped around his waist from behind, trapping him with you.

“Please, stay…” You murmur against his back. The softness of your plea has him biting his lower lip anxiously as a storm builds up inside his head. He is a heartless mafia executive, so why's it so easy for you to grip his frozen heart and melt his resistance away?

Dazai's hands rest above yours, kindly trying to push them away, but your grip was strong— He wouldn't want to use too much force accidentally. The last thing he wishes to do is hurt you.

“Darling, I'm busy. You know how the mafia works. Can you take those cute hands away and let me go?” Seeing no answer from you, he gave your hands a few pats, “C'mon, or do you want Chuuya to punch my face for being late again?”

With that, he felt your grip soften, leaving him the opportunity to stand up from your couch. When he turns around to face you, a small chuckle escapes him at the sight of your defeated pout.

“Will you come tomorrow too…?”

Dazai purses his lips and looks away. Conflicted.

Both his mind and heart were arguing whether to stay and appreciate these moments with you before everything comes to an end or be selfish, spend more time with you, and put your life in danger for being in a relationship with a mafioso.

His presence is nothing but an inconvenience.

Maybe he wasn't meant to love, maybe he was never meant to care for another human being, at least in the way you cared so sweetly for him. He doesn't get along with most people after all.

“…Sure.” He replies, his voice soft as a hand reaches for your cheek, his thumb caressing your skin for a few seconds, enjoying the lasting moments.

Before he could leave, you pull him for a hug that leaves him stunned. Everything stops; his breathing, his heart, his mind— All because of your sudden display of affection. A hug was something he wasn't used to. It took him a while until his arms wrapped around your body, letting you melt against him.

No words were coming from any of you, just calm breathing and small caresses over each other's back in your dimly lit living room. The embrace lasted for a few minutes until you pulled away. Your eyes meet his, trying to see through him, wishing you could just tell him everything your heart yearns for.

“Take care, Osamu…”

Dazai gave you one last small smile, squeezing your hand in his hand before walking away, opening the door of your apartment, not glancing back, as he disappeared in the dark.

Maybe, one day, he'll figure out how to make his life less miserable; someday, he could let himself enjoy your presence without fearing the consequences of his existence.

Maybe one day he'll change.

© 2024 kolyubov — Do not copy, repost, or recommend my works on other platforms. reblogs are welcomed and appreciated!

[asterafroditis]

𐔌 . ⋮ learn to let me go .ᐟ ֹ ₊ ꒱

☓┆Malleus Draconia x gn! reader

𓏵 381 words

ᝰ.ᐟ 3rd Person POV, no pronouns used, angst, hurt/comfort

finally got around to making a Malleus fic! feel free to like, reblog, or comment!

ᝰ.ᐟ masterlist

Malleus has always known that humans are fragile things. Your existence, compared to his, is fleeting—like a firefly’s glow in the vast night sky. But knowing and accepting are two different things.

When he placed the curse upon the world, freezing everything in eternal slumber, he told himself it was for their sake. For the safety of those who feared him, for a world that would no longer need to change. But deep down, he knew—there was another, more selfish reason.

You.

If time never moved forward, then you could never leave him. Your warmth would never fade, your voice would never become a distant memory.

But when you stood before him, unaffected by the curse, your eyes full of sadness instead of fear, he realized—this was not what you wanted.

"Malleus," you whispered, stepping closer. "Why are you doing this?"

His hands clenched into fists at his sides. "Because time is cruel," he admitted, voice quiet but heavy. "Because one day, you will be gone, and I will be alone again."

You looked at him—not with pity, not with fear, but with something far more painful. Understanding.

"I won't be here forever, Malleus. I know that," you said gently. "But that doesn’t mean we should stop moving forward."

He turned away. "And when you are no longer by my side? What then?"

Your fingers reached for his, intertwining with his own. "Then you remember me. You carry me with you, even when I'm gone."

Malleus trembled. He had faced centuries of solitude, endured the weight of his bloodline and duty. And yet, the thought of losing you was the only thing that truly terrified him.

But as you held his hand, unwavering, he realized—freezing the world in time would not save him from the pain of loss. It would only trap him in an endless, hollow dream.

Slowly, he exhaled, his grip on your hand tightening, as if grounding himself in your presence. "You are cruel," he murmured, but there was no malice in his voice. Only love. "To make me love you, and then ask me to let you go."

You smiled, pressing your forehead against his. "Then love me while I'm here."

And for the first time in what felt like eternity, Malleus let time move forward again.

[doumadono]

Hi baby!! Mwaaah! I have an emergency request if it’s okay? Can you have either Bakugou or Touya (maybe him as just Touya or maybe Dabi? You can decide) where the reader is having such bad flashbacks of their abusive relationship before them that they can’t get out of bed and every little thing set them off in a way they starts to get worse with them flashbacks?

Touya & Bakugo with gn!Reader who deals with flashbacks of past relationship

A/N: I hope you'll enjoy these two short stories 💋

EMERGENCY REQS MASTERLIST - PART 2

Touya

Touya sat by the edge of the bed, his pale fingers tracing absentminded patterns on the sheets. His partner, Y/N, lay beside him, their body curled into a tight ball under the covers.

It had been a rough night. The nightmares that haunted them were growing worse, and Touya could do little more than hold them as they trembled and cried in their sleep. 

Now, as they lay still, Touya watched over them with a heavy heart. ”Y/N," he murmured softly, brushing a strand of hair away from their face. "It's morning. You should try to get up."

Their eyes fluttered open, but the vacant, haunted look in them made it clear they were still trapped in the grip of their past. 

Touya’s heart clenched at the sight. He had seen that look before – in his own reflection, back when his life was consumed by pure pain and hatred.

"I can't," they whispered, their voice barely audible. "Every time I close my eyes, I see him. I feel his hands on me... I can't escape it. I can’t believe I spent so much time in such an abusive relationship… I should have tried to escape but I felt weak."

Touya’s jaw tightened. He understood the feeling all too well, the relentless grip of trauma that refused to let go. Leaning down, he pressed a gentle kiss to their forehead. "You're not there anymore, Y/N. You're here, with me. And I won’t let anyone hurt you again."

They shook their head, tears welling up in their eyes. "It's not that simple. Everything reminds me of him. The sound of the door, the creak of the floorboards... even the way the light filters in reminds me of being trapped in his flat."

Touya’s eyes darkened with anger – not at them, but at the monster who had done this to them. "We’ll make new memories to replace the old ones. If you still feel trapped, maybe you should consider moving to another town, to leave the past behind?”

They looked up at him, hope flickering briefly in their eyes before being extinguished by fear. "What if it doesn’t work? What if I’m broken forever? And I distinctly remember you saying that “the past never dies”, Touya.”

Touya's breath caught at the mention of his own words, thrown back at him like a painful echo. He closed his eyes for a moment, steeling himself against the rush of emotions that threatened to overwhelm him. When he opened them again, his gaze was steady, intense. "I did say that," he admitted, his voice a low, steady rumble. "The past never dies. It’s a part of us, a shadow that follows wherever we go. But that doesn’t mean it defines us." He leaned closer, his forehead pressing gently against theirs. "I know you feel broken. Hell, I’ve felt that way for years. But look at me, Y/N. I'm still here. Still fighting. Because even though the past never dies, it doesn’t mean it wins. We get to decide who we become, every single day."

His fingers traced gentle patterns on their arm, a calming, grounding touch. "I’m not saying it’s going to be easy. It’s not. There will be days when it feels like the shadows are winning. But you’re not alone in this. We’ll face those shadows together." He paused, searching their eyes for any sign of understanding. "You’ve already survived so much, babe. You’re stronger than you think. And if the past tries to drag you down, I’ll be here to pull you back up. Every single fucking time."

Touya cupped their face in his hands, his touch gentle despite the callouses. "You’re not broken, Y/N. You’re healing. And healing takes time. Allow yourself to heal.”

They stayed like that for a while, the silence between them filled with unspoken words of comfort and solidarity. Slowly, they began to uncurl, their breathing evening out as they leaned into Touya’s embrace. "Okay," they whispered finally. "I trust you. Thank you for being here for me, Touya.”

Touya smiled, a rare, genuine smile that was reserved only for them. "Always."

Bakugou

Katsuki Bakugou was not a man known for his patience. His explosive temper and brash demeanor were infamous, but when it came to Y/N, he was willing to wait. Wait for them to feel safe, to heal, to trust. 

Today, however, his patience was being tested to its limits.

He stood at the door of their bedroom, hands clenched into fists at his sides. Y/N lay in bed, their body trembling under the blankets. It had been a bad night, and the morning wasn't proving to be any better.

"Y/N," Bakugou called softly, trying to keep his voice gentle despite his frustration. "You need to get up. You haven't eaten anything for nearly two days."

They didn't respond, their eyes fixed on a spot on the wall as if it held the answers to their torment. 

Bakugou took a deep breath, forcing himself to calm down. Losing his temper wouldn't help them at all.

He walked over to the bed, sitting down beside them. "Hey," he said more softly, reaching out to touch their shoulder. "Talk to me."

They flinched at his touch, a reaction that sent a pang of hurt through Bakugou’s chest. He pulled his hand back, clenching it into a fist to keep from lashing out. Not at them, of course, never at them – but at the memory of the person who had hurt them.

"It’s him," they whispered, their voice shaking, "I can’t get him out of my head. Every sound, every shadow… it’s like he’s still here, watching me."

Bakugou’s eyes flashed with anger, his mind filling with violent thoughts about the man who had done this to the person he loved the most. But he knew that wouldn’t help right now. What they needed was reassurance, not rage.

"He’s not here," Bakugou said firmly. "He’ll never hurt you again. I swear on my life, Y/N. You’re safe with me."

They turned their head to look at him, tears streaming down their face. "But I don’t feel safe! Can’t you understand that?! Everything reminds me of him. The way the door creaks, the shadows on the wall... I can’t escape it! I know I’m no longer in his hands, but goddammit, I feel like he still owns a part of my soul!”

Bakugou’s heart ached at their words. He wished he could take away their pain, fight off their demons like he did with villains. But this was a battle that couldn’t be won with fists and explosions. He took a deep breath. "Then we’ll change it," he said finally, determination in his voice. "We’ll get rid of the shadows, do whatever it takes to make you feel safe. We’ll make this place your little haven, does it sound okay?”

They looked at him with a mixture of hope and doubt. "What if it doesn’t work? What if I’m always scared?"

Bakugou leaned in, pressing his forehead against theirs while rubbing their shoulders. "Then I’ll be here, every step of the way. I won’t let you face this alone. We’ll fight it together.”

They took a shaky breath, their body slowly relaxing against his. "Okay," they whispered. "Together."

Bakugou nodded, a small smile tugging at his lips. "Together."

[munchmemes]

hozier lyrics, unreal unearth edition

❛ your reflection can't offer a word to the bliss of not knowing yourself. ❜ ❛ no closer could i be to god or why he would do what he's done. ❜ ❛ what you live in, it finds a way to live in you. ❜ ❛ your heart has such darkness. ❜ ❛ i wanna be gone. i wanna run so far, i'd beat the morning. ❜ ❛ before the dawn has come, i'd block the sun if you want it done. ❜ ❛ let all time slow. let all light go. ❜ ❛ i don't need to know where we begin and end. ❜ ❛ i'd still know you, not being shown you. ❜ ❛ the first time that you kissed me, i drank dry the river lethe. the liffey would have been softer on my stomach all the same. ❜ ❛ some part of me must have died the first time that you called me baby. ❜ ❛ some part of me came alive the first time that you called me baby. ❜ ❛ these days, i think, i owe my life to flowers that were left here by my mother. ain't that like them? gifting life to you again. ❜ ❛ oh, to share the space with simple living things infinitely suffering but fighting off, like all creation, the absence of itself ... but anyway. ❜ ❛ some part of me stayed alive each time that you called. ❜ ❛ whatever keeps you around, it keeps you around. ❜ ❛ when i was young i used to guess, are there limits to any emptiness? ❜ ❛ how could you think i'd scare so easily? ❜ ❛ my life was a storm since i was born. how could i fear any hurricane? ❜ ❛ i would do it again if i could hold you for a minute. ❜ ❛ what good would it be on the far side of things? ❜ ❛ i would not change it each time. ❜ ❛ heaven is not fit to house a love like you and i. ❜ ❛ i feel lighter than i have in so much time. ❜ ❛ how could i fall when i am lifted by every word you say to me? ❜ ❛ if anything could fall at all, it's the world that falls away from me. ❜ ❛ if you need to, lean your weight to me. ❜ ❛ if we fall, i only pray, don't fall away from me. ❜ ❛ i'm starving, darling. let me put my lips to something. ❜ ❛ you can't buy this fineness. ❜ ❛ we can celebrate the good that we've done. ❜

❛ we had nowhere to go and every desire for going there. ❜ ❛ i heard once, it's the comforts that make us feel numb. ❜ ❛ it was just our turn being blamed for a world we had no power in. ❜ ❛ i haven't felt it since then. i don't know how the feeling ended. ❜ ❛ i know being reckless and young is not how the damage gets done. ❜ ❛ we knew what our love was worth when we had nothing. ❜ ❛ i miss when we did not need much. ❜ ❛ you were steering my heart like a wheel in your hands. ❜ ❛ all i needed was someone when the whole wide world felt young. ❜ ❛ hold me like water or hold me like a knife. ❜ ❛ you and i burned out our steam chasing someone else's dream. ❜ ❛ how can something be so much heavier but so much less than what it seems? ❜ ❛ you only feel it when it's lost. getting through still has its cost. ❜ ❛ if there was anyone to ever get through this life with their heart still intact, they didn't do it right. ❜ ❛ we didn't get it right but we did our best. ❜ ❛ knowing that everything will end should not change our plans. ❜ ❛ all things end. ❜ ❛ there are some things that no one teaches you that come natural as a dream you didn't know that you were in. ❜ ❛ the awful things we do to make the head go quiet. ❜ ❛ you may never know your fortune until the distance has been shown between what is lost forever and what can still be known. ❜ ❛ i don't wanna be anything but i would do anything just to run away. ❜ ❛ go look another way. ❜ ❛ look, i wanna be loud. so loud, i'm talking seismic. ❜ ❛ i will not be great but i'm grateful to get through. ❜ ❛ the memory hurts but does me no harm. ❜ ❛ the moment i knew i'd no choice but to love you. ❜ ❛ there's a part of me, i'm afraid will always be trapped within an abstract from a moment of my life. ❜ ❛ you know, the distance never made a difference to me. ❜ ❛ so, i thought you were like an angel to me. ❜ ❛ it ain't the being alone. it ain't the empty home. you know i'm good on my own. ❜ ❛ so much of the living is the being unknown. ❜ ❛ do you know i could break beneath the weight of the goodness i still carry for you? ❜ ❛ there are some people who are better unknown. ❜ ❛ darkness always finds you either way. ❜ ❛ after this, i'm never gonna be the same and i am never going back again. ❜

[bunnliix]

Can't Stay Away from You - Chapter Three

I'm finally back after over a month! I hope this is enough to make up for not updating this series for a month.

masterlist wc: 5.7k warnings: panic attacks, disassociation maybe??, better to be safe than sorry, reader just has a rough time in this chapter, angsty times, violence against doors, violence in general, Minho bites, slightly suggestive-ish??, also fluff!! I think that's it?? I'm really not sure at this point, but it's basically reader having a rough time and the boys helping her

Y/n was the first to wake up the next morning, and she found herself in a bit of a pickle, stuck in between the two omegas of the skz pack. She was in a bit of shock, not remembering anything past being on the couch in their living room. She wasn’t quite sure how she got to be here, in the middle of their nest, and in the middle of the eight men. She noticed that Felix had attached himself to her back, their legs entangled along with Han’s, and her birthday twin was clinging onto her front, his head almost buried in her neck. She could feel his breath on her neck, and it made her shiver. She didn’t think that she’d ever be in this position, but fuck now that she knew what she was missing out on, she never wanted to sleep alone again. It just felt so right to be here, it felt right to be with them, but that thought was also terrifying. 

She started to try and untangle herself from the pile, needing a moment to breathe, and a moment to herself. She tried pulling her legs out of the pile, to little luck, the two omegas’ grips were almost cutting off the circulation in her legs when she tried pulling them up towards her chest. Her next move was to try and pull herself out of the boys’ grip, only to have them hold onto her tighter, as she let out a huff as their stubbornness, even while they’re asleep. Stupid omegas not letting go.

She froze as she felt a pair of lips on the back of her neck, knowing that had to be the freckled sunshine boy. She took a harsh breath in as she tried to relax, but then Han left his own kiss on her neck, as she gripped the bed underneath her to try and ground herself. She could feel herself slicking up after the actions of the two omegas, her own omega screaming in joy at this whole situation. She tried to will her thoughts in a less smutty direction, to which it almost worked.

That was, until Seungmin woke up due to her movements and her scent that betrayed her. His sleep filled eyes looked at her over Han’s head, an eyebrow raising at her actions, and she quickly looked away, garnering a chuckle out of the vocalracha member. 

“Go back to sleep, omega.” He says, morning voice very evident, as his voice sounded much more gravelly than normal. 

She shivered at it, and silently nodded, though she pouted at being told to go back to sleep. The change in her scent as she thought of how nice the singer’s morning voice sounded was what finally work Han up, and the rapper smirked at her change in scent. She got so flustered just at his member’s voice, and Seungmin didn’t even have the best morning voice. That would go to the Aussie line, with Minho as a close third place. Those men’s voices in the morning, he would never get enough of them. It may also be the reason why on mornings where they had schedules, the alarms were set for earlier than usual. Jisung pulled her back down into his arms, holding her tighter so she couldn’t escape.

“Not allowed to leave, ‘mega.” Han says, voice full of sleep, though his smirk could be heard in his tone of voice as well.

Seungmin chuckled at her predicament, finding it hilarious. His laugh woke Minho up, however, and once the dancer was awake, he also chuckled at what she had gotten herself into. She looked adorable trapped between his two omegas, and she looked like she belonged right in the middle of their nest, like she had occupied it forever.

“Cute. Three cute omegas, and my good omegas for keeping little omega in bed with us.” He praised the two, and Han preened at the praise from the alpha, while y/n pouted.

“I’m not cute.” She protested, to which Minho only raised an eyebrow, staying silent while he stared at her.

“Just cause I’m an omega, doesn’t mean I’m cute. Got it mister?” She said, glaring at him now. 

This riled up the alpha, who was very rarely challenged. He growled in warning to her, red eyes flashing at her. She crossed her arms, staring at him dead in the eyes, challenging him to do something if he’s that bothered.

“Omega, stop with the denial. Now.” He once again growled at her, his alpha very unhappy with her disobedience, and the self-deprecating nature of her comments. By this point, the rest of the pack had woken up from their exchange, if not by Minho’s growls.

“Hmmm, nahhh. I’m good. Once again, I. Am. Not. Cute.” She said, voice firm, but with a teasing lilt to it.

Han had wisely loosened his grip, and had loosened Felix’s as well, just in time for Minho to grab her. The alpha pulled her underneath himself, staring down at her as his eyes flashed red, warning her that his alpha was dangerously close to the surface. She stared defiantly back at him, not willing to budge on her position, nor showing any fear of the alpha. His alpha enjoyed the good fight, but was displeased by the omega refusing to submit, disregarding the fact that she wasn’t their omega, and had no obligation to submit to them, to him.

“Omega, be good.” He said firmly.

“I’ll pass on that.” Was all she said in return.

Normally, an omega would have bared her neck in this situation, but y/n fought that urge and won, leaving the alpha to have to force her to bare it. Minho, who was running completely on instinct once again, leaned down close to her neck and he nipped at it, leaving a mark.

“Omega. Submit. Now.” He growled into her neck, biting at her neck harder a second time when she didn’t give in right away.

Y/n whined, unprepared for what happened, but she submitted and gave in. She stopped fighting him, and bared her neck willingly, to which the alpha above her grinned at winning. 

“Good ‘mega. Very good.” He told her, kissing the marks he left. “Don’t deny it again, or pull an attitude with me. You’ll end up back underneath me if you do.” He told her simply, before flopping down on top of her.

She whined in embarrassment but a blush remained on her face after she processed what happened, and Minho chuffed in delight at it, before he allowed her to move out from under him. She didn’t get the freedom she wanted, however, since Hyunjin immediately pulled the omega into his arms, holding her tightly. The others chuckled and laughed at her predicament, enjoying seeing her be passed from one member to another, thinking about how cute she was. Though a couple did worry about her, seeing as she was just subjected to Minho’s alpha, mostly the betas, since they knew how it was to be subjected to an alpha, especially in the manner she had just been affected. They watched her closely, eyes following her movements.

Eventually Hyunjin loosened his grip, and y/n took advantage of this to escape his hold, quickly scurrying out of the room before anyone else could take the chance to catch her once again. Thankfully, for her sake, she quickly found the bathroom, only running into a few of the boys’ rooms before finding it. She locked the door behind her once she entered, and she quickly used the bathroom before she found herself in the mirror, staring back at herself. She looked at herself, not recognizing the person she saw in the mirror’s reflection. Hair mussed and out of place, Minho’s bite marks visible on her shoulder, and she just looked different. She couldn’t describe what was different exactly, and that plus all of the feelings that had been building up in her that morning finally fought their way to the surface.

She couldn’t believe everything that’s happened in the last 24 hours, let alone the last 48 hours. She went from bumping into who she now knows was Felix, to the fanmeet and meeting Stray Kids and getting Chan’s number, to Hyunjin and Minho showing up at her hotel room last night before bringing her here, to waking up in the nest with them. What was her life, and what had she done to end up here? She couldn’t process all of this, nor could her omega. Her omega was distressed, but also strangely content, and she couldn’t comprehend that either. It was all a little too much for her omega and her to process, going from being alone by herself to being here, with all of them, and honestly being treated like a member of the pack, it’s almost too much to bear.

She vaguely saw herself sliding down the mirror, thoughts in her head of why she was here with them at all, why she was being treated like a member of the pack when she clearly wasn’t, why were they being this nice to her? She couldn’t understand how she, a normal fan who met them once, well Felix met her twice, and how this went from that to her sitting in their bathroom after having slept in their den. The world around her felt like it was spinning, and she couldn’t process anything going on around her, the only things she could focus on were the thoughts running through her mind, making her worry further. She felt sharp pin pricks, looking down to find that she had been digging her fingernails into her hands, breaking skin. Without realizing it, she had been hurting herself and her scent had leaked out of the bathroom, slowly invading the rest of the dorm. 

Time skip backwards a tiny bit…

The boys watched y/n’s escape, laughing at how cute she was, as they heard the sounds of various doors opening and closing, before hearing silence, figuring that she had found either someone’s room to hide out in, or the bathroom. They chatted amongst themselves, figuring that she’ll find her way back once she’s ready. They mostly spoke about their own schedules, thankfully they all had the day off today, since they had just finished their comeback promotions, the fansign yesterday having been the final one of their promotion cycle. 

It wasn’t until a disgustingly nasty smell wafted into the nest room that made a couple of the members gag that they realized something was horribly wrong. Felix and Chan jumped into action, the omega of the duo almost slipping on blankets as the two of them rushed out of the room, Minho and Jisung following closely behind, with the rest of the pack not far behind the four of them. They follow the scent to the bathroom, finding the door locked, and they know she’s in there.

“Y/n? Darling, please open the door for us please?” Felix called out to her, worry filling his voice. 

The sour scent of smoke only gets stronger at his words, and he and Han know she could drop at any moment, and with the door in the way, they would have no way to help her. Chan sees a shadow move from underneath the door, and realized that she’s sitting against the door, which means forcing their way in wasn’t an option.

“Please baby, talk to us. We’re here for you.” Jisung called out, trying to keep the worry and fear out of his voice. 

They hear her breathing pick up and Chan curses, if she wasn’t against the door, he would have gotten Changbin to break the door just so they could get to her. He tried to think of a way to get her away from the door, just so that they could break it down. He didn’t care if he had to get another door, her safety was more important than a door right now. 

“She’s against the door, we need her out of the way, then Bin or I can break it down.” He whispered to the two omegas, who immediately understood what he wanted them to do. They continued talking to her, trying to coax her either away from the door, but really they wanted her to unlock the door, as it would make everything else much easier. They tried appealing to y/n first, but then when that didn’t work, they started appealing to her omega, hoping that it would work, because her scent smelled like a bonfire, and not in a comforting way. 

Minho sees the shadow underneath the door move, and points it out, to which Chan immediately tries to open the door, still finding it locked. He huffs in frustration, but quickly reels that feeling in before he looks to Minho and Bin, who pull the omega duo closer to themselves, giving Chan the room he needs to bust the door open. 

“Omega, stay away from the door, I’m gonna open it and I don’t want you hurt. Alpha doesn’t want to hurt you, okay?” Chan said to y/n, before he shoved his shoulder into the door, partially opening it. He tried once more, successfully breaking open the door, and looking into the room to find y/n pushed up against the bathtub, her wide eyes staring up at him. Her breathing is still way too fast, and tears are running down her cheeks and onto her chest as she just stares at him. 

“Hey little omega. You’re okay, we’re gonna get you out of here and get you somewhere safer than the bathroom, yeah?” Chan told her, kneeling down on the ground in her line of sight , trying to make himself seem smaller so he didn’t appear threatening to her omega. He slowly inched closer to her, staying far enough away in case her omega felt threatened by a strange alpha’s presence. He watched her, her breathing still erratic but her eyes were trained on his form, not letting him out of her sight.

Chan took a deep breath before asking her, “Can I touch you, little one?”

He watched her, waiting for a response, but instead of replying, she launched herself at him. “Alpha.” She said as she pushed himself into the pack alpha’s arms, burying her head into his neck. Chan froze for a moment, before wrapping an arm around her and patting her back to comfort her. He whispered reassurances and comforting words in her ear, trying to calm her down as he felt her tears on his skin. He still had no idea why she was like this, nor what sparked this breakdown and subsequent drop, considering that her omega had taken control. 

Hearing footsteps, he looks up to see Minho having made his way past the door, looking up at his second-in-command with worry and confusion in his eyes, seeing those same emotions mirrored in the other alpha’s eyes. The others peeked into the room, the two omegas whining at seeing how tiny y/n looked curled up in their leader’s arms, both them and their omegas wanting to reach out to her and calm her down themselves. They couldn’t stand seeing another omega in distress, it physically hurt them to see it, let alone for it to be a fan of theirs like this, and without knowing what caused it, they weren’t sure how to fix it. 

Seungmin suddenly pushed his way through the rest of his pack and quickly entered the bathroom, moving past Minho and stealing y/n from Chan’s grip. He was a beta on a mission, even dodging a punch from his pack alpha for taking the omega. He darted out of the bathroom, carefully however, so that the girl in his arms never hit anything as he made his way to his own bedroom, knowing that the only way she’d calm down was to take her away from the onslaught of scents, especially her own. Staying in that stinky bathroom wouldn’t help her state of mind, it would only reinforce it. And since he tended to keep his own room pretty scent free except for his own and a few select scents, it was a perfect place to let her recover. Hyunjin and Changbin had immediately followed the youngest beta, trusting him as their pack beta to know what the best thing was to do, despite his age.

Seungmin pushed his bedroom door open, walking over to his bed as Hyunjin followed, as Changbin stayed at the door to keep everyone else out. Chan had almost stormed after the pack beta, his alpha ready for a fight with the beta who stole the omega out of his arms. It took both the other alphas to stop him, plus Changbin wouldn’t let him anywhere near the younger trio in the pack beta’s room. 

“Chan, you need to chill off before you come anywhere near here.” Changbin told him, crossing his arms as he stood in the doorway of the bedroom. “Go take a walk, I don’t care what you do as long as you don’t try to force your way into this room right now.”

Chan huffed but didn’t say a word, walking away from them, against his own alpha’s wishes. Minho watched him walk away, deciding to keep an eye on him, knowing that it was his alpha making him feel this way, as Chan wouldn’t give into his anger easily if not for his alpha pushing him to. He said as much to the rest of the pack outside of the room, before stalking behind their pack leader.

Meanwhile, Seungmin beckoned Hyunjin to sit on his bed and once the other beta was sitting comfortably, passed y/n over to him, with whined protests coming from the omega who wanted to stay with him. 

“Shhh, it’s okay, I’ll be back in a moment, okay? Jinnie is gonna take care of you for me, yeah? He’s a really good cuddler, I’ll have you know. Even if I don’t like to admit to enjoying cuddles that often, he gives really good ones.” Seungmin said to the omega, pointedly not looking up at the other beta as he said all of that. 

He moved to his closet, finding a new blanket he had yet to use, and thankfully it was still in its packaging. He brought it out of his closet and over to the bed, taking it out of the plastic and wrapping it around y/n as Hyunjin helped him to do so. He sat on the bed in front of the other two, as Hyunjin whispered reassurances to the omega in his lap, and trying to convince her omega that she was safe with them, and to allow y/n to come back to the surface.

It took almost an hour for them to coax y/n back to the present with them, her actions still telling them that her omega wasn’t far from surfacing again, should the need arise. The two betas traded relieved looks, before Seungmin looked over at Changbin, who still played the bouncer role, keeping the others out of the room, even as the two omegas looked like they were five seconds away from tackling the buff man just so they could get close to y/n again. She looked up at Seungmin, who could see that her eyes were no longer glazed over and almost dull looking, they looked to have some of that life and sunshine back in them. He breathed a sigh of relief, before asking her the hard question.

“Hey, how are you feeling, sunshine?” He asked her.

He got a groan, and a mumbled, “Tired.” in return. 

He chuckled, expecting that answer after everything that happened. He knew now wasn’t the time to ask the harder questions, like what exactly made her panic like that, and how she was faring after the omega drop. That would come later, when she wasn’t as tired, and when she was a bit more coherent. Hyunjin kept her mind in the present, blabbering about anything and everything as he swayed them both side to side, trying to help keep her relaxed.

Seungmin knew that it wouldn’t be a bad idea to let the others in the room now that she’s back with them, but he’s worried that one of them might try and ask too many questions about what happened and that could cause her to drop back down or spiral. That was what he didn’t want to happen. Looking over at the eldest beta, he could see the eldest was subtly pointing at Felix.

Felix wouldn’t be a bad choice, he usually was the comfort that most of the boys went to when they just needed someone to be there for them, without any pressure, and when one of the betas weren’t around to help either. He also would probably be the most comforting to y/n at the moment, and the one who would pick up on any cues she showed, being a fellow omega. He nodded to Bin, who let Felix and only Felix into the room, despite Han’s whine. Their sunshine omega carefully approached the bed, not wanting to spook or shock y/n. 

“Hey, y/n sweetheart, Felix wants to come over here. Is that alright with you?” Hyunjin asked her, pointing out Felix who was waiting for her permission. 

She didn’t look back at him, eyes locked onto Felix as she nodded. The other omega could see unshed tears in her eyes, from when she was still emotional earlier. Felix walked closer to the bed, and as soon as he was within arms length of y/n the slightly older omega reached out and grabbed a hold of him, almost launching herself at him. He pulled her close, lifting her into his arms as they embraced, the rest of the pack watching them with happiness in their eyes.

Felix moved to sit them both down on the bed, Seungmin and Hyunjin both hung around to keep y/n happy. The two had tried to get up and leave, only for the smallest omega to whine at their attempt to leave. They ended up in a pile on the bed, y/n’s quiet giggles making their squished situation on the bed much more bearable.

During this, Han disappeared from the pack that was waiting outside the door, which was only himself and Jeongin at this point, and headed to the living room, where he could hear the two eldest discussing something. As the younger man walked into the room, the two men looked up at him as he made his way over to them.

“We have to talk.” Han stated, looking at the other two.

“What about?” Chan asked, concerned.

“About how we’re all treating y/n like she’s already a part of our pack, when we all know she isn’t. At least not yet.” Han replied.

“Why is that a problem? Isn’t it better that we’re treating her like pack?” Minho asked. “We’re getting along insanely well, she fits right in, her scent is amazing. What’s so wrong about treating her like she’s one of us?”

“What’s wrong, is that although I think all of us, and our respective alphas, betas and omegas, treating her like pack means everything good, and that she’s probably meant to be one of us, is that it’s what’s caused her to break down like this. Before this happens again, we all need to sit down and talk. I’m serious, because I can see she’s like me, and you know exactly how bad I got when he-who-shall-not-be-named left us and the pack. I don’t want her going through that, because we’ve all decided something without telling her.” Han says, slightly scolding the boys without directly doing so.

The two alphas were sheepish, knowing that they did kinda fuck up with what they’ve done so far. Though now that Han has explained it to them, they understand how exactly their actions could have contributed to this whole situation, and decide that they’ll be better about it in the future. Han then decides to drag them back to the room, now that the three of them have had this talk. In theory, should he have said this to all of them? Yes. But that would mean leaving y/n by herself, and that wasn’t a good idea right now.

Walking back to Seungmin’s room, they found that Jeongin had finally been let in, and Changbin had also stopped guarding the door. They took a peek inside the room, finding that the pack was softly talking with each other and y/n as they were scattered on and around the pack beta’s bed. 

“It seems you’re doing better y/n. I’m glad.” Chan said, causing the others to notice them.

“Hyungs, Hannie, you’re back!” Felix welcomed the three men back into the room, happy to see them.

The three are quickly beckoned to join them, though Hannie is beckoned to join the beta/omega cuddle pile on the bed. Once he is close enough, Han is pulled into the pile by Felix, and the betas move around to let the omegas curl in the middle of the pile. This is how they all spent the next little while, letting them all relax in the company of the others, and conversation flows easily, but comfortable silences in between those little conversations. The omegas spend this time getting to know y/n better, asking all sorts of questions, wanting to know her better, and the others also occasionally ask their own questions to her as well. It’s more of an interrogation than a conversation, considering that the omega knows more about them, than any of them know about her.

After a while of this silence, Seungmin decided it was time to speak up, knowing that they really needed to talk things out with y/n.

“I think we really need to talk about what happened. I know it’s not easy to talk about it, y/n, but I think it’s something we need to have a conversation about. I know you haven’t known us long, but I hope that we’re able to talk honestly about these things.” Seungmin said, broaching the topic of y/n’s breakdown.

Y/n’s reaction was immediate as she sat up and looked down at her lap, avoiding eye contact with any of them. She took a breath, still not looking at any of them, before she started speaking.

“I started thinking about all of this, all of what’s happened in the last 24 hours. I went from talking to all of you at the fanmeet, and somehow going from that to being here, and not only being here, but Lee Know and Hyunjin coming to my hotel room, and then bringing me here. Then you all let me into your nest. Me, a fan, being let into your nest and then waking up there and I don’t remember how I got there. And then Minho went alpha on me. Neither mine or my omega knew how to process any of that, let alone the fact that you all treat me like pack when you barely know me. Why? Why me? I’m just a normal girl and you’re all Stray Kids. I don’t get it.” She spewed out, her breathing starting to speed up. 

The boys looked shocked, though Han and the two eldest alphas looked less shocked than the others. Felix and Hyunjin started tearing up at her words, feeling so bad that they’ve caused her to feel this way. Han thought that he was right on what the cause of her drop and spiral was, and he felt bad that he was right.

“I feel so confused, I feel so at home here with you all, but before I met you all yesterday, I had never been around you at all. I shouldn’t feel this at home with all of you, let alone any of the alphas, but I am. And that terrifies me because I can’t figure out why. I don’t wanna leave, but I can’t help but worry that I’ll have to. Not even that I’ll have to, I will have to leave, I can’t stay here forever. I’m not one of you, I’m not a part of your pack.” She finished, tears dropping down onto her legs.

Chan moved to kneel on the bed in front of her, a hand reaching out to tilt her head up so he could look her in the eyes.

“Your feelings and the way you are feeling is perfectly valid. I want to say that before anything else. I am sorry for treating you like one of us, without any explanations and for going about this as we have been the last 24 hours. We’re at fault for, without a better way to say it, shoving you right in the deep end without saying anything that would have helped you and your omega understand why you went from being a fan at the fansign, to being here with us in our dorm. We’re at fault for that, and we should be the ones begging you for forgiveness.” Chan apologized, while explaining things slightly as well.

“I think why you feel at home with us, is because you’re meant to be one of us, meant to be part of the pack.” Han piped up, all eyes on him. “I said this to Chan-hyung and Minho jagi, but I think why we all took to you so quickly and why you took to us, is because you’re meant to be here, with us, as part of the pack.” He finished, sitting up and looking at y/n as he did so.

Y/n’s eyes had widened during Han’s explanation, and those who were looking at her could see understanding blooming in her eyes as she processed what Han said. She breathed in, wiping away her tears as she took in that they felt the same way she did, and that her feelings weren’t odd. She felt better now about her feelings, now that the boys explained to her what their feelings and thoughts on the situation were, and she expressed her relief to them, that it wasn’t just her, that they felt that way too.

Changbin, sensing that she needed a hug, got up, rounding the bed to sit down behind her as Seungmin pulled Felix out of the way. The buff beta’s arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her into his lap as he kissed the top of her head. She snuggled into his hold, getting comfortable on his lap. The other boys cooed at the two of them, to which y/n blushed, hiding her face in her hands.

This sweet moment couldn’t last, as y/n’s stomach rumbled, signaling that it was definitely time for food. Minho immediately took that as a sign to make food and in his alpha’s eyes, to provide for her. He moved to snatch her from Binnie’s grip, despite the yelling from said man to give her back, and takes her into his arms to take her with him to the kitchen. When he got there, he placed her down on the counter away from the space he’d need for cooking, but close enough that she was around for him to keep an eye on her. He quickly moved around the kitchen, checking what they had in the dorm, and finding that they had a lot, so he set out to make a bunch of different dishes. He made sure to include both spicy and non-spicy dishes, including some less spicy versions of dishes, for both his spice intolerant packmates, and y/n if she also turned out to not be a spicy food person.

As Minho cooked, y/n watched with rapt attention, aware of his every move, interested in watching him cook food for them all, while her omega whispered to her how good of an alpha he was, providing for her and his pack. She tried to move off of the counter once, to try and help the taller man, only for her to be picked right back up and placed on the counter once again.

“Stay here. Don’t move.” He told her, before moving back to cooking.

Soon enough, the others made their way out of the bedroom and into the main living area, some of them checking the kitchen and finding the duo. There were more than a couple teasing remarks made to Minho about his actions, and at least one spoon was thrown in the direction of those who made said remarks. Thankfully, food was quickly finished, and y/n hopped off of the counter, moving to take the plates and dishes out to the table, as Chan managed to find an extra chair for y/n to sit on. Chan sat at the head of the table, with Jeongin at the other end, as the others sat where they could find a spot. Y/n was directed to sit in between Seungmin and Changbin, the two betas keeping her company. The buffer of the two betas piling food onto her plate, making sure she was fed enough, and that the boys wouldn’t eat the rest of the food, leaving her with almost nothing. The conversation flowed as they ate, and not once did y/n feel out of place, they always made every effort to include her, as those that spoke English translated for those that didn’t speak the language as well. 

After they had finished, the betas took care of the dishes, as it turned out it was their turn to wash up today. Y/n was walked, well really half-dragged over to the couches in the living room, by the youngest alpha, who decided it was his turn for attention. He sat her down on the smallest couch with him, so no one else could take up her attention, despite the whines and huffs about it from the others. He had a monopoly on her attention, well, until she was stolen by the other two alphas and placed in between them. This eventually ended up in her being surrounded by all eight members, as a movie day was decided on between all of them, with a little bit of everyone’s favorite movies being shown, with the exception of horror movies. Y/n sighed happily as she settled and happily enjoyed the movies and fighting that occurred.

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[armandsbf]

“I DREAMED OF YOU, I CAME FOR YOU, I FOUND YOU.”

INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE, SEASON ONE, EPISODE THREE AND FOUR

SUMMARY: After Louis and Lestat’s latest argument, Louis comes home in chaos with a charred body behind him, unknowing of what it would mean for them. Unknowing of what blessing he’d be granting to Lissette.

AN: She has arrived my lovelies! Claudia’s here!

NEW ORLEANS, 1917

Things were changing again. Things were changing again. Louis and Lestat had argued, again, and this time Louis had left. Something about his work, a direct attack on his and other black businesses which had led him to retaliate in what Lissette thought was a true form of justice.

But it caused a ripple effect, a seething fire burning in the heart of Storyville which the younger vampire could not stand to watch. Lestat had been proud, told him it was an impressively vile act which convinced him further of Louis' vampiric nature.

Louis had sneered at this, calling Lestat out on his lack of care for the damage that was ensuing.

"You did what you did because it gave you pleasure." Sang Lestat as Lissette clung to her daddy's hand. There was no calming Louis, but Lissette's touch pressed softly against him like a healing balm. "Companion of the dark gift, finally." Lestat took his face in his hands. "We should make this our anniversary."

"Papa, enough." Sighed Lissette, softly pushing him away from Louis.

"Anniversary?" Scoffed the younger vampire. "That out there, that's on me." He pointed to the fiery chaos beyond their home.

"Well, yes. Yes, you merely provided them the excuse." He shrugged it off. Human life didn't matter to him. "It's as I say...toss them into circumstance, they go for the throat."

"And that's why you and me ain't never gon' work." Louis said, a sense of broken finality to his words. "It don't matter? That could've been Ettie out there, would you care then?"

That had stunned Lestat into tense silence.

Louis gulped, almost nauseous. "That's why you're always gonna be alone." He said, turning to Lissette's teary face. He patted her head and spoke into her mind so Lestat wouldn't hear. "I'll be back for you, sugar. I promise."

He promised. That was enough for her.

She nodded and he placed a kiss on her head, walking away.

______________________

Lissette's mind had gone blank. It was an odd feeling, given the fact that her mind was constantly racing, but right here and now, she couldn't conjure up a single thought.

Shee couldn't shake the fear that her Daddy was actually leaving. Leaving her. No, no. He said he loved her and he wouldn't leave. Forever, he said. She was sure he'd come back soon enough and eventually they'd laugh at all of this.

She and papa were sat in the living room on the couch, her head in his lap as he sang to her. Her French lullabies. She was fourteen, and perhaps a little too old for them, but they never bored her.

He seemed so very sad, and she didn't know how to tell him that Louis would be back, that he wouldn't leave just like that. Daddy was perfect, and he was theirs, he wouldn't just go away.

She cuddled into him and for a moment, he smiled. It was a small smile and a short moment, but she'd done her job.

A silence followed and he brushed a hand through her hair. Her eyes were wide and hopeful as he spoke. "You'll never leave me, mon ange, will you?"

Her brows furrowed and then she really, really, looked at him. His eyes were so vulnerable, his grip on her so very tight she almost couldn't breathe. Trapped on his arms, she'd never felt safer than this. Touch to touch, tender to tender, salvation to the damned. I love you. You're mine. Don't leave me.

I love you. I'm yours. I'd never. She held his hand tightly. "Never, papa."

He nodded slightly. "Good." He said, an air of relief covering the room. "Your heart within my own. That's all I'll ever need. Always."

"Always." She said.

And then everything went to hell. The door flung open, ash and blood spilling onto their pristine carpets. Both Lioncourt's jumped to their feet.

He was back, Louis was back. His skin was charred and his hands bloody, but none of it was his own. His face was chaotic and panicky, hands shaking as he held onto...something.

"Lestat!" He cried. "Lestat, you've gotta help!"

He carried the body up the stairs, Lissette and Lestat following in a blur of confusion and concern. "Daddy!" She called out.

"Ettie, please stay downstairs!" He said to her, but made no effort to close the door of their bedroom as his companion and daughter came in.

It was then that Lissette truly saw what her Daddy had brought home. It was a girl. A girl who was roughly her age. A girl who was dying. She had burn marks all over her skin, her breathing rough and ragged, hands clutched to her chest as if to allow more air in.

"Daddy, what did you do?" She asked in shock.

He shook his head. "Go downstairs, Ettie!" He said in a panic.

He fussed over the body as Lestat began to spew words and phrases in French.

Lissette neared the girl carefully, eyes scanning her body. She kneeled on the floor by the bed. The desperate breathing made her sick to her stomach, pity curling in her bones. The girl took once glance at her and her eyes widened as much as they could.

[Excerpt from Claudia's Diaries, 1917

"And then I saw her. The fairy girl that looked like one of those princesses my mama used to read to me about. She was crying too, and I couldn't figure out why! She was too pretty to cry, and why would the fairy girl cry in heaven?!"]

Lissette brushed a hand over the girls hair, trying her best to avoid her injuries. "Sh, sh, sh. It's alright. It's alright. You'll go easy, mon chaton." My kitten. Her eyes were prickling with tears.

Louis could not tear his gaze from her, already mournful. "She goin' cold. What do we do?"

Lestat scoffed. "Nothing. We do nothing."

"She's dying." Argued Louis passionately.

Lestat shook his head. "More human entanglement. Drain her." He walked briskly to his daughter, putting his hand on her arm. She was shaking. He sighed deeply. "And you've upset our daughter. Brilliant move, mon cher." He shushed her slightly. "Lissette come. To your room you go."

But she wanted to help. She wanted to make the girl better. She looked so beautiful under all the charred skin and rough cough. There was something magical about that girl, something desperate to live. She shook her head. "No, papa. I want—I-I want to help."

"You can't help her, Lissette. I promise you, you can't."

"She's only a kid." Said Louis desperately.

"Please, papa, I swear I can help!" She cried.

"Lestat, come on!"

"Enough, both of you!" Spat Lestat. "Lissette, your room, now!" He said in a tone which seemed so very mean. But it wasn't like that. He just wanted her safe.

She jumped back, eyes teary once again. Lestat shivered at the way her watery blues widened in shock, her mouth itching to say something but just remaining agape.

He couldn't reach out to touch her, not in the chaos of the situation, so he just watched as she carefully walked out of the room.

_______________________

NO ONE'S POV

Louis was in shambles, his entire body was shaking. "Make her like us." He begged.

Lestat replied angrily. "How could you ask that?"

"No, no please." He begged, fists tapping softly against his chest.

The blonde couldn't say no to him, no matter how much he wanted to, so he tried to logic his decision. "I don't know where to bite. Her body's all charred." He said.

But his companion wasn't so easily swayed. "You know you can do this."

He couldn't wrap his head around Louis's wants. Why would he do this? This girl wasn't anything to him. "And she'll be what?" He scoffed. "A lap dog?"

He shook his head, voice desperate with emotion. "No, not...not a dog."

Lestat suddenly stood very stiffly, his body taking in Louis' meaning. There was something inside him so desperate to satiate the belief of his own humanity, there didn't seem to be a limit. He wanted more, more than him, more than Lissette. "A daughter. Another daughter." He breathed.

Louis was suddenly struck with his own reality, spitting out a pathetic, "I-I-I don't know."

The other vampire looked him up and down, the tension palpable. "Perhaps it has, as of late, escaped your notice but we already have a daughter. You were ready to abandon our home. Ready to abandon her, and now you want to bring in another? Another child?" He spat eyes locking in on his.

Louis did not have the words to explain himself, but he was aching to be better. I can help, he told himself. I want to help. "I-I just need her not to die. Please."

The girls strained breathing could be heard in the background, and with that, Lestat had made his decision.

He sat beside her, fangs digging into her neck as he hauled her body close to his mouth.

She drank with reverence from his wrist after, and that became the day the vampire Claudia was born. That was the day Louis gave Lissette her sister.

_____________________

[Excerpt from Claudia's diaries, 1917

"Right away, I had a lot of questions."]

LISSETTE'S POV

When the sounds had finally calmed, Lissette let herself out of her room. In the last few months she'd leaned to somehow regulate her emotions, and has stopped crying at her papas big reactions to things. He just wanted her safe, she knew that.

The air in the house had shifted, something more positive, a singing sunshine echoing in the walls of their home. The pitter-patter of another pair of feet, the soft giggles of a girl who wasn't Lissette but sounded like magic all the same.

"So, this is my new house?" Asked the voice gleefully.

"It is if you want it to be." Answered Louis.

Lissette walked closer, her green skirt swishing as she did, finally catching a glimpse of the girl. Her heart stopped at the sight. She was so sure that under the layers of burnt skin, the girl would be lovely, but she could not account for the pure joy she exuded with a simple smile. She seemed fiery, like a spark like a bomb. The way she walked was like a hop-skip-and a jump kind of walking, like she was walking on air. Her eyes were red, glowing like embers. Papa had fixed her, healed her, made her like them.

There was someone new in her family. Her heart might've exploded.

"This is my fountain?" She continued with her questions. "That's my..." she paused at the sight of the incinerator. "What is that?" She furrowed her brows.

"Well, that's the incinerator where we burn the..."

But Louis interrupted Lestat quickly. "We'll get to that soon enough."

She sized him up slightly. "So where'd you find me? At my old house?"

"I heard your cry for help. We...We can hear people's thoughts."

She chuckled cartoonishly. "What?"

"It's true." Nodded Lestat.

But she wasn't so easily convinced, stubborn girl. "Prove it. What am I thinking now?"

"Well, I can't." Answered the eldest simply. "I'm your maker."

"You're wonderin' if your nails will be like that forever, and the answer is yes." Cut in Louis, then shifting to speak to the girl within her mind. Lissette huffed slightly as she could hear.

Then the two of them began to laugh, a laugh that would intertwine them for the rest of time, a loud similarity in them. "What's funny?" Lestat tried not to sneer.

But they continued.

Lestat waited a moment longer before rising to his feet. "Well, I can see where this is going." He swished behind her in a flash. "Bonjour." He grinned.

She gasped, quickly turning to sweet laughs. "How'd you do that?"

"Well, you'll do it too, in time, my little milkweed." He smiled, settling back into the role of a father quite comfortably. "I'll teach you, just like I taught Louis here. But not if we're going to have family secrets." He was quick to add.

There was a silence then, lingering between them like an unspoken promise. The bases of bonds stronger than life and death were created there, connecting them forever and always. Beyond the veil, beneath the dirt, these words would ring true.

"We're a family?" The girl asked quietly.

Louis took her in, eyes taking over her excited face. It was oddly reminiscent of the first time Lissette had called him daddy. "Yeah, but with no secrets."

"And as such," sang Lestat, putting his hands on her shoulder with a wide grin. He pushed the smiling girl closer to where Lissette was hiding giddily. "I believe it's time you met the final piece of that family."

Lissette sprang from her hiding spot behind the wall with a shy grin, but all her shyness deteriorated when she drew a loud gasp from the newest vampire.

Her eyes suddenly seemed brighter as she jumped in her spot. "Is that my sister, then?! I've always wanted a sister! Oh, she's so pretty!"

She sped toward Lissette with a burning happiness and threw her arms around her, holding her just tight enough for it to be comforting and not painful. Lissette oomph-ed into the hug, but within a moment wrapped her arms around the girls waist with such fervour, it was like they'd known each other their entire lives.

They were so different, Lissette like a peaceful stream and the other like an undying storm, but both passions ran deep in their veins. One a soon to be growing woman and the other a forever child. One North and the other South.

But there would never be one without the other.

Then she detached herself from the girl, but she still held tightly onto Lissette's hand. "Oh, you are so beautiful!" Cried Lissette. "I'm Lissette! I am your sister!" She said giddily. "What's your name?"

It was so absurd, two girls who didn't even know each others names had somehow formed a bond that would be stronger than anything they'd ever felt. Sisterhood swirled in their minds.

"I'm Claudia! I'm your sister!" She answered, squeezing Lissette once more for good measure. "Sister, sister, sister. I ain't ever gonna get tired of that word."

"Claudia, Claudia, Claudia. I'll never tire of that one." Countered Lissette, then turning to her parents hand in hand with Claudia. Claudia. She pulled her towards both men. "Look! Look at my sister, look at how wonderful she is!"

Louis laughed and leaned down to press a kiss to her blonde hair. "You're so right, sugar. She is wonderful."

"Looks like you two will get along just fine." Said Lestat with a content grin.

"Now, I got a question," Claudia said, pointing at the incinerator. "So, what's that for?"

Now Lestat could answer. "That's where we burn bodies."

"Why do we burn bodies?"

Lissette just laughed.

[flagellant]

Have you talked at all about your feelings about Barbie? Cause what little I've seen seems to like up with my feelings on it and it feels weird to be surrounded by unbridled praise or MRAs hating on it because it's Girly™️

At the end of the day Barbie was only ever going to be able to be just a Barbie movie. At the end of the day Mattel paid Margot Robbie and Ryan Gosling more than $10,000,000 to be Stereotypical Barbie and Ken. At the end of the day Mattel's stock price has risen to more than 20 dollars per share, more than double in the past two years. At the end of the day Mattel wanted Greta Gerwig to make them a movie that would make the most people possible want to buy more Barbie-branded things. At the end of the day Mattel would only have released a "new breakup movie" if that press was considered more profitable. At the end of the day, Barbie is a story that wants to sell you Barbie, and therefore it cannot have a message which would distract from selling you Barbie. At the end of the day the Mattel CEO and board go back to the real world having learned no valuable life lessons beyond "Listening to a Mexican woman can make you major profit margins". At the end of the day the mother and her daughter have learned the valuable life lesson that the only way the world will pay any attention to the banality of your suffering is if you can sell it to a lot of young girls. At the end of the day Ken's friend Allen is never allowed to be a Ken (man) and therefore is constantly associated with, but never as, the Barbies (women), and no one seems to question this nor care. At the end of the day, all of the Barbies learn that in order to defeat the patriarchy you must be emotionally manipulative and flirty-but-in-an-evil-way. At the end of the day Barbie tells a story about biological essentialism and battle-of-the-sexes in a bright pink #Empowering way and Margot Robbie cries several times. Kens are told that they are "not 'just' Kens" but also that the reason that they sought out the comfort of patriarchy--the idea that their masculinity and manhood was something to be cherished and respected just as much as a Barbie's femininity is, and that they were not lesser or greater than each other--will not be addressed as anything more than a hilarious Gotcha meta-laugh about how at the end of the day women still don't have rights in any meaningful way no matter how empowered they are under the current system. The conflict built around having no vocabulary to describe the complex and difficult emotions that these dolls have been going through has been resolved by ending the movie before resolving or questioning this. At the end of the day the Kens are villains and jokes, and as the credits roll, we can be safe in knowing that absolutely nothing has changed and all of this will happen again in the exact same ways.

In the movie Barbie, at the end of the day, Ken asks to sleep over at Barbie's Dream House for the night, and she tells him no, because it is Girl's Night, every night, forever. We see the Barbies go to sleep with Stereotypical Barbie saying, "Good night, Barbies! I'm definitely not thinking about death anymore!" This is very funny, and she goes to sleep and then wakes up feeling probably about how I do every morning, which is supposed to be relatable.

At the end of the day, in the movie Barbie, we see Ken walking away from Stereotypical Barbie's deathless and eternal slumber party dejected and alone. He is walking to the exit of the Barbie Dreamhouse Neighborhood. We do not see if he gets to go to sleep in his own house. We, in fact, see quite a lot which implies he is homeless and goes to sleep on the beach, which I was forced to do when I was 18 in Santa Cruz in one of my first attempts to escape a toxic and abusive household. I still remember the way that the sea can rot when trapped by wooden pier foundations, covered in mildew-wet seafoam, old kelp from the high tide, and the way that when I got up the next morning you could see exactly how I'd fallen asleep like an old-school chalk outline of where a corpse was.

At the end of the day, in the movie Barbie, what the Kens wanted revolved around having their own homes that they could go to sleep in and fill with things that made them happy just like how the Barbies did. This is supposed to be a symbol of patriarchy, because they corrupted the femininity of the Dream Houses, and that is bad. When the Barbies win, at the end of the day, the Dream Houses go back to being Dream Houses, and we still have never once seen any sign that the Kens had houses, and the movie assures us that if they don't, then "maybe someday" they might have enough societal power to be able to try and fight for a house that they're allowed to own and have be theirs, something that women in Western society have only quite relatively recently gained the permission and possibility to do, and Barbieland is basically the same as the real world but with the "two" genders switched.

At the end of the day, if I try to actually analyze the Barbie movie as a bioessentialist antifeminist and anti-intersectional regressive film which glorifies the thinnest possible shred of pro-capitalism feminism possible, I'll sound like a fucking lunatic, because it's just a stupid movie about dolls made to sell you Barbies, and of course it would never be anything but bioessentialist pro-capitalist toothless brand bullshit which wants you to think that Margot Robbie and wearing pink are the peaks of antipatriarchal activism. At the end of the day, Celluloid Barbie can only exist because Mattel thinks Celluloid Barbie would make its brand a lot of money, and not because it actually cares about the anti-ageing fatphobic standards of Western womanhood, because Mattel is a brand which can care about nothing except being a machine which you put money into and in exchange pink plastic bullshit comes out.