#I feel like I could be killed for that comment

[wosofutbolfan]

I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar

Alexia Putellas x Explorer!R

8.5k Fluff, Fun, Minor Angst

Hi Guys,

This is pt4. in the 'I Would Climb Every Mountain With You" otherwise known as Explorer!R Universe. TW: description of killing an animal.

Highly recommend you read those 3 first, as this is entrenched in lore. Pt 1 can be found here.

It's developed from an ask I received from @karsonromanoff so thank you so much for the idea! I hope I did it justice and I'm sorry for the delay and the words. ha.

This is the first time I've written since my dad died. I'm not being emo or heavy about it but I am asking to please, be kind. I know there's nice people out there but often they're drowned out by the loud haters.

So throw us a comment, like or reblog if you enjoyed. I'm just trying to get back into something that brought me joy. I know I enjoyed writing it.

Also, may be weird for a fic about a spanish gay footballer, but you probably need a good working knowledge of Bear Grylls to understand 80% of this. ha.

As has become tradition, here's the song running though my head when writing! Yes, my music taste remains to be that of someone born in 1962. God love Helen Reddy.

“Vamos Ale! I don’t like to make Miguel wait…” you shout from the kitchen, bag resting on the countertop as you try to fix your bracelet with your left hand,

“Deja de preocuparte, a él no le importa, I will be one minute…” you head called back from the bedroom where your wife had been getting dressed for 2 hours now.

Yes.

Your wife.

Sometimes you couldn’t believe it.

Sometimes the weight of the band on your finger catches you by surprise and you’d remember.

Sometimes Alexia would place her hand on your bare thigh and you could feel the cool metal on your skin and you’d remember.

Sometimes you’d get called “Mrs Putellas” at a school talk, or at the Doctors, and you’d remember.

It felt so natural that sometimes you’d forget that you weren’t always Alexia's wife.

But now you are. And had been for almost 6 months. And married life couldn’t have suited you more.

Your wedding ring was your new favourite accessory, you never took it off.

In a fire you would save Alexia and your ring.

Maybe even your ring first.

It was embossed with the imprint of grass that Alexia has been collecting from each pitch of each game she had played in since you had met. The intricate design brought tears to your eyes as soon as you saw it. Made even worse by the inscription “’cause you are my goal”. 

You would be embarrassed if Alexia hadn’t cried like a toddler when you presented her with the ring you had made for her, which had rock from each of the 7 peaks you had scaled, as well as a granule of sand from the Dead Sea set within it. Integrated into the metal, visible but smooth to the touch. 

The inscription 'every mountain high, every valley low' on the inside of the band.

You knew you’d done good and you knew your Ale well enough to anticipate the absolute mess she would be when presented with it, ensuring you had a pocket full of tissues for the inevitable waterfall.

You weren’t wrong.

You had to assure a passing couple on the trail you had chosen that she was fine, not having a medical incident and you were definitely not mid break-up but in fact exchanging wedding bands early because you knew your fiance well enough she didn’t need her teammates to witness this much of her soft side.

Though you tried, they still saw enough on your wedding day to tease her for the last 6 months with no sign of slowing down.

Though right now your wife's behaviour was nothing but unexpected. You had agreed to attend one of Alexia's events this evening. Since getting married you had felt more of a duty to attend and make up for the years you’d left her carrying her own handbag whilst you trotted over mountains on the other side of the world. 

She insisted that you didn’t have to. Like she always did. You weren’t one for the fancy dresses and the flashing cameras. But you saw the gleam of hope in her eyes as she insisted she would be fine on her own.

You couldn’t let that sparkle dim.

Also you had to set off for a camp in a few days and you had gotten seriously stuck in the honeymoon phase meaning that an evening without your wife by your side wasn’t something you could stomach.

Not that you would admit to being so clingy.

But it wasn’t like Ale to take so long to get ready, neither of you being particularly fussy, usually she would throw on some light makeup, smack your bum whilst you ate nutella off a knife under the hob light, procrastinating getting ready until she dragged you and dropped you into the ensuite, steal a kiss and a spray of perfume, and wait for you whilst watching old football clips in the living room.

But now, as you still struggled to attach the clasp of your bracelet and you had one eye on the poor Barca driver, Miguel, waiting in your driveway, you started to grow frustrated at your wife's sudden vanity.

You smelt her perfume invading your senses as you felt her arms envelope you from behind, moving your uncoordinated left hand away and easily attaching the clasp of your bracelet for you, pressing a kiss to your neck as she did so.

“Finalmente… Let’s g-...” you spoke as you turned in her embrace, finally taking in her attire which stopped you in your tracks.

“Boobs”

You had suddenly turned into a 14 year old boy and you couldn’t explain it.

You had seen your wife naked hundreds of times.

Hundreds of fantastic times.

But here she stood looking, regal. Her hair falling lightly over her face, her dark sparkly dress with wide shoulders and only what you could describe as a boob portal you had been rendered speechless. Mouth gaping open like a fish.

“...Amor?...” you heard the delight in her voice. “Are you listening to me… my eyes are up here.” she jokingly clicked her fingers in front of your face which took you out of your breast-inspired trance.

“Ale you are so beautiful” you looked deeply into her eyes but you didn’t miss the blush rising from her neck. And you meant it. She was. Wow. 

“Do you like it?” she asked, shyly, “You don’t think it’s too much? It’s just the first event we’ve gone to together since we got married and I wanted to…”

You interrupt her but pressing a kiss to her lips, and, well, if you slipped a little tongue in there then fine. She was your wife after all.

“What? Show the world what they're missing out on? I am so proud to stand by your side, my love.” you whispered into her lips, as you toyed with her wedding band. 

You couldn’t help yourself…”and your boobs are fantastic.” 

She barked out a laugh as you leaned back into where you left off, but she took a step back, her heel clicking against the tile floor, to which you let out an annoyed grumble.

“Oi Oi, Mi Amor. What about poor Miguel, he is waiting, Si?” she teased.

“He doesn’t care… Cálla y bésame.”

—---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You took a deep breath and leaned back on your chair at the round table you found yourself at. Alexia had been pulled from your side which she had stuck to like glue all evening,  to go and present the final award of the evening which she had just done, very sexily if you do say so yourself. All confident and boob-y.

You smiled, imagining her now making small talk backstage, eyes bored but a smile plastered on her face as she tried to make her way back to your table.

Your other table-mates seemed to take the opportunity of the break in the ceremony to raid the free bar put on by the charity. Which seemed very uncharitable of them. But, as you toyed with the rim of your glass, who were you to judge?

Stomach full from a mediocre-mass produced meal and head happily fuzzy from the bubbles you had consumed you found yourself oddly satisfied as you sat here. In this conference room-turned auditorium in the middle of Barcelona, here, loudly and proudly as Alexia's wife.

Mrs Putellas.

You couldn’t help but smile to yourself, you felt weirdly grown-up. With your wife, your house, and your business. You blinked and missed yourself becoming so settled and for once in your life you weren’t terrified of the idea.

You saw the glint in Alexia's eye. When Irene and her wife would come round for dinner and bring their kid. She’d surrender all hostess duties and sit on the living room floor, crawling around at the beck and call of whatever imaginary game the 5 year old insisted on. You’d seen her perfect her lion roar in that very spot. It probably matched the glint in yours when you were grocery shopping and a child being pushed in a trolley would go past shoving cookies into the trolley without their Mother seeing.

Maybe, you thought, maybe it was time…

“It is you! I am so sorry to interrupt. I had to come over to introduce myself. I am such a fan…”

You glanced around, expecting Alexia to be standing over your shoulder and smiling politely at the person who had approached your table to meet her… but you were met with blank space and then you engaged your silly brain and realised the person was speaking English and looking at you and…

Oh My God.

It’s Bear Grylls.

“Oh My God. You’re Bear Grylls.” 

You let out. 

Stupidly.

Standing and thrusting your hand out like an idiot to your legitimate childhood hero.

You and your brother would watch his series for hours as children. Sat cross-legged 2 inches from the TV on your living room floor, eating up every second of his adventures. Your mum had to stop you from eating a woodlouse once in your garden because you’d seen him eat a cricket in the Amazon the evening before. Your brother smacked upside the head for trying to drink a cup of his own wee for the same reason.

Now you were a well-seasoned adventurer yourself you knew that all of that was for theatricks. 

You had spent more than 7 weeks wandering the Amazon yourself once, and not one drop of urine passed your lips. Not one 8 legged insect had you gulped down in one.

But still.

Hero.

He took your hand graciously, as you both sat back down you prepared to barrage him with questions but before you could he jumped right in…

“I have been wanting to meet you for years. But my team said you had disappeared off to Spain and couldn’t be tracked down. Please, I've been desperate to know. .. Tell me all about summiting Orjas del Salado…”

So you told him, and you asked him about his adventures, and you chatted for what could have been hours, sharing stories and advice with Bear-fucking-Grylls.

He blushed as you pointed out his for-TV tricks and you thanked him for being a portal into the wider world from your living room.

At some point you felt Alexia return, a strong hand on your shoulder. You paused your monologue about Patagonia and giddily took her hand in yours, introducing them to each other. 

Polite pleasantries exchanged you could tell she had legitimately no idea what was going on or who this middle-aged English guy at your table was, but judging from your excited eyes, she didn’t need to interrupt.

It didn’t take too long for someone from his team to pull him away for an interview with the charity. But as you stood to say your goodbyes he made an offer, “You know, me and the production company are making a special about survival in the Alps… I would love for you to be a guest star.”

You stood there like a gaping fish for a moment. “Really?” you asked, in wonder, your 7 year old self spinning around in glee in your chest. Alexia smiling up at you from her chair at the joy in your voice.

“Of course! I would be honored, it’s especially about how to survive in an Avalanche situation. Obviously, with what happened in Nepal…you are an expert in that fie…”

At that point, Alexia stopped her polite silence she had been maintaining whilst you had your moment with your childhood hero. And abruptly stood, clutching your hand hard in both of hers, stern look on her face.

“No.”

From the look on his face you gathered that this successful upper-middle class white English man had not been told no too often, and a beat of silence followed which Alexia was more than happy to fill.

“Sorry Se��or Oso. She doesn’t do snow now. Thank you for the offer though.”

She said it with such finality that even you didn’t think to question it. Her mis-translation brought a smile to your face. Her hands still encompassed yours, her eyes didn’t leave his face. As though daring him to rebuff her.

He looked at you as though to confirm she could answer for you. Of course she could. But you knew this refusal wasn’t just about you, but about her also. You knew the anxiety it would cause her for you to put yourself in that situation wasn’t worth anything on this planet.

Nevermind the trauma it would dredge up for you. So obviously, you agreed.

“Sorry Mr Grylls. Not my rodeo anymore. I’ve got some contacts though who you could work with” you politely confirmed your refusal and felt Alexias hands lessen their grip on yours in relief.

“No, no, of course. Sorry. But no. I would really love for you to be involved in the series. We have an episode about promoting women in outdoor pursuits. It's still on the drawing board, but if you are interested I’ll get our people to liaise with each other!”

“That sounds amazing but… I don’t have any people for you to…”

“Don’t be silly Mi Amor” Alexia interrupts again, hand still in yours and the other expertly reaching into her clutch and pushing a card into his outstretched hand… “We have people. Please, Oso, be in touch.”

Smiling vaguely and confusedly at your wife, still clearly mildly terrified of her, he takes the card as he's dragged away by his handler. He's probably still in hearing distance as you squeal in glee and throw yourself into your wife's arms, making her spin with the momentum.

“Ale, Ale, Ale!!! Do you know who that was….” you exclaim.

She can’t help but laugh aloud at your antics, soft look on her face as she lifts you lightly off the ground to stop your spin.

“Si Mi Amor, ese era el hombre oso de la televisión. Tu favorito.” she replies with a smile on her face, speaking softly, somehow, in the middle of this event where she was the guest star, making you feel as though you were the only person in the universe.

“No.” you corrected “..eres mi favorito.” You sealed your words with a light kiss to her lips, chaste but warm.

“Ah, Si. And you have had some wine. You always get soft after wine.” she lightly rolls her eyes with affection at your gushing over her.

It’s your turn to roll your eyes as you pull her into a soft sway, your childhood hero quickly forgotten now you’re in the company of your wife.

Though the giddiness in your bones from your encounter remains.

“Si the wine.” you agree moving your lips close to her ear as you whisper, breath dancing against her cheek, your hand moves to her chest and you feel her breath falter at your closeness,

“but also your boobs.” and you quickly poke her exposed chest between her breasts before she can stop you, and you move away from her pulling her behind you as you rush off to the bar.

“Amor!” she cackles.

“Vamos Ale! A La Barra!”

—-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Estoy Muerta.”

You grumble in complaint into the chest of the warm and moving pillow that you had clearly settled on in the night.

“Shh Ale.”

��Me estoy muriendo y a mi esposa no le importa.”

“You are not dying Ale. You are hungover and over 30”, you mumble in reply, moving away from resting on her chest, the heat becoming too much for your own fuzzy brain.

“Explain to me how that is different.” she doesn’t take kindly to your light chuckle in reply, as you move your hand to cover your eyes from the sunlight starting to bleed through the curtains.

You peek an eye open and see the remnants of your previous night strewn across the bedroom floor.

You take in the glorious dress of your wifes thrown across your chest of drawers. You recall unzipping it with your mouth after making very good use of the boob portal. Much to Alexia's delight.

You had probably taken it a little bit too far at the bar. Your giddiness let your binge-drinking brit out a little too much.

You had a flash of memory at dancing on a table at a dive bar in the town centre, before being brought down by Alba who you had called and demanded come and dance the night away.

Meanwhile Alexia had been in the corner trying to drunkenly explain to Mapi a set of complicated tactics that they should try out at an additional training session in the morning.

“I thought you had scheduled extra training today Ale” you teased after taking in her pasty complexion as you rolled over and settled back down onto your, cooler, side of the bed.

“I hate you.” she replied, quite seriously, as she moulded herself against your back, taking your hand in hers and burying her face into the back of your neck.

“Of course you do, dear, it feels like it.” you tease again, wiggling yourself and making her grumble again.

You rest there for a few moments, before you’re dragged onto your back again and pulled into Alexia's embrace as she moves you around like her own personal teddy bear.

You go with the flow, quite used to your wife's clingy nature, especially when she didn't feel well.

But your silence doesn’t last two minutes before she rolls you over again, now onto your back, “Oh bloody hell, where are we going now.” you mumble, as she rests her head on your chest this time, nuzzling into your breasts.

“me estoy poniendo cómodo.” she mutters into your bosom, “allá. ahora estoy cómodo”. You run your hands through her hair, smiling down at your wife who is practically purring at the attention.

“Bebé…”, you make a noise of affirmation.

“Will you…” you know what she wants, and you know she must be feeling bad if she’s asking for attention.

“Si, my love. voy a trenzar tu cabello. One big plait or lots of little ones?”. 

“The tingly ones por favor” she mumbles into your chest. Your heart expands at her adorableness, never quite learning the English for ‘french plait’ they became known as the ‘tingly ones’ in your household, because of the feeling she would get as you plaited her wet hair after a game, hands working through her scalp. 

It brings a smile to your face and you can see the lovesick smile on hers where it is squished against your chest.

You start to section out her hair as she lies still, your ministrations slowly putting her to sleep, working methodically in the quiet morning.

Moving strand over strand in intricate braids, lightly tugging her scalp and undoing when it's not perfect and redoing, giving her an extra scratch to the soft skin behind her ear when you get there, knowing it's her most sensitive spot. Receiving a sleepy purr in satisfaction as your reward.

You hear the animals from the national park outside, feel the sun starting to warm the room around you. Her chest rising and falling against yours hypnotising you further into the moment. You’ve got grand plans, brunch and a walk along the beach in your mind, maybe a lazy afternoon swim, hold on no. Maybe a lazy afternoon skinny dip. Yeah.

That sounds good.

You’ve almost finished tying off the last plait when you are startled back into the moment by the buzzing of your wifes phone on the bedslide table.

You fight back a smile at the groan that is emitted from your fully grown-pro-athlete-wife.  It resembled that of a teenager who’d been asked to clean their room or no dessert. When she doesn’t go to make a move you nudge her shoulder.

“Ale. Ale, your phone."

“No.”

“Yes."

“No."

“C'mon Ale.” you reach across and pick the phone up. “It could be important. It could be your secret wife wondering where you are.”

She rolls off you at your tease, throwing you a glare that resembles more of an angry kitten than anything, “It could not be, she knows where I am. I snuck out whilst you were dancing on the tables in that last bar to make plans for dinner.”

“Ah, Si of course. My mistake.”

She surges up and gives you a completely unnecessary chaste kiss, as though even the joke is too much and she has to confirm she’s kidding. The phone has stopped vibrating against the bedside table and the silence that settles over you both is welcome.

“How are you so okay? I feel like I have been run over by a truck.” she states as she rubs her face, finally sitting up to start the day.

“You are old.

“I am 2 months older than you.”

“Two, very long, months my darling.” you tap her cheek lightly as you move to get out of bed, throwing on one of her oversized t-shirts you find on the floor.

“Seria, how?” she asks again, now sprawling across the space you have vacated.

“I am English. I once did a vodka shot through my eyeball in the park. I was 14.” you state, plainley, eyebrow raised in challenge as she just looks at you, open mouthed.

“Ojalá no hubiera preguntado.” she mutters, as her phone starts to ring again.

“Ale, phone.” you say, just to annoy her.

“¡lo sé!” you hear thrown at you, as you head downstairs to set some food out for Billy-the-Goat, and make a coffee for your dying wife.

Soon after, you feel her presence behind you as you stir her coffee, turning as you feel her hands wrap around your waist and presenting her coffee and she takes it from you as though it's a ballon d’or. She takes a sip before she presses a kiss to your head.

“That was my agent.”

Your heart drops, and you can’t help the petulant whine that leaves your lips.

“No, Ale! I wanted to spend the day together. Try that new brunch place Alba told us about. Have a swim, just be together. Whatever brand needs you can wait. Tell them no, please” you finish your little monologue with a pout, and you feel a childish frustration rise as a laugh teases against her lips.  You don’t get very far when a kiss is pressed against your lips.

“Well that sounds like the perfect hangover cure Mi Amor. Do you not want me to tell you what it is before I tell them no though?” there's something in her taunt, a glint in the eye that makes you think twice as your mouth already wraps around the refusal.

You take a moment too long apparently, and she takes things into her own hands as she clutches her coffee happily and spins around, “I’ll tell them no! Don’t worry Mi Amor…” teasing lilt in her tone. Whatever the news is, it has pulled her from her hangover.

You wait a beat

Another.

“Fine, What is it!” you groan out in defeat, hands raised to the sky, Alexias t-shirt riding high on your thighs as you raise your arms.

Your wife turns and is distracted momentarily by the flesh on display. Before you cough and she remembers what she's supposed to be doing. Coy smile on her face returning.

“That was my agent…” you huff out at her drawing out the anticipation. “Or should I say our agent.” your brow furrows in confusion as she continues… “she has been contacted by a muy interesado oso.”

Realisation starts to dawn on you, memories of the previous night flashing in your mind and you can’t help the grin that forms.

“Si, Mi Amor. It turns out he really meant it. She said they were willing to offer anything to get you on. She’s getting the details now and will contact us again after our day together today to see if you are interested”.

“I am interested!” you exclaim with glee, Alexia throwing her head back in laughter.

“I know Amor, but let's let them sell it to you. You need the details. Though… I am sure it is no more dangerous than ojos de vodka.”

—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Hola, love!” you shout into your empty hallway, hands full of groceries, you shuck off your trainers, hearing them thump against the wall as you struggle into the kitchen.

Tonight was the premiere of “Man Vs Woman” , the special episode of your and Bear's adventure. After the offer was made you met with the TV production company via Zoom to go through ideas.

You pretended you didn’t know Alexia was standing just outside the door to your study, listening and clearly deciding if she thought it was too dangerous or not. At least that's what you deduced from her interrupting with a cup of tea every time a particularly hairy idea was mentioned.  

When you brought this up with her you pretended you didn't see her blush creeping up from her neck. Because you’re her wife and it was the wifely thing to do.

The concept was a really cool one. You were excited from the start. The idea was that you and Bear would both be dropped in an inhospitable environment with a map and a knife and nothing else. Neither of you would be told what type of environment but you had assurances in your contract that it wouldn’t involve snow. You had 28 days to get to the muster point. Whoever got there first won.

Simple.

Convincing Alexia it was really cool. Less simple.

“Amor what if there are animals!”

“I know how to avoid dangerous animals. And there will be a medical team on standby,”

“What if you fall and cut yourself on your knife."

“What if you get tackled and break your leg?”

“That's different. What if you lose your map and can’t find your way out and you have to live out there forever”

“I will always find my way back to you.”

“What If-”

“Ale.”

You stopped her rambling with a kiss and when you pulled away you looked deeply in her eyes.

“Que pasa I miss you too much?” eyes wide and vulnerable.

There we go. Her real source of anxiety.

You had spent more time apart than most couples but since you scaled down your travels you had fallen into a sweet domesticity you could admit was a struggle to pull yourself from. 28 days plus the week before to get to the location is longer than you’d like. But it was an adventure of a lifetime. Maybe… maybe your last adventure? The thoughts had been creeping in more and more recently.

Of early mornings chasing more than sunrises, maybe rising due to a baby's babble instead?

You’d made sure that Alexia really knew how much you’d miss her the night before you flew out. On reflection maybe you should have rested your muscles a little more before such a physically demanding month but. Be serious. Look who your wife was. 

You are not God's strongest soldier.

So, off you had gone. Competing against your childhood hero for all of womanhood. And you couldn’t lie. You loved it.

Being blindfolded and dropped in an unknown location was exhilarating. Learning the land as you went, with only a map and a knife in hand it was one of the biggest challenges of your life.

The team had made good on their promise and the tropical rainforest you were in couldn’t be further from a snowy mountain range.

You’d refused to let anything slip to Alexia in the 3 months you’d been back. Lips tightly sealed no matter what she tried. You wanted her to be surprised and watch it in real time with you. In all the games you'd attended since you had to deal with an injured Mapi yapping your ear off whilst you tried to concentrate on the game, probing for hints about if you won, what you won, where you were, if you wrestled a snake, how big was the snake you’d wrestled.

“Maria stop with the snake!” you’d finally snapped during the tense quarter final of the Queen's cup.

Which had worked.

For all of two seconds.

“What did the snake taste like?”

You’d originally planned to go home to England with Alexia to watch the premier with your family. But then a schedule mess-up in the league had meant that Ale had to play in a rescheduled game the day after the premier. It just didn’t work for her to come to England.

She insisted you still go, but you refused. You wanted to watch her game. And you knew she’d need you when the show was on. Even if she didn’t know that yet.

You started to unpack your groceries mindlessly, you’d picked some great snacks for the evenings viewing, you suddenly were hit with how suspiciously peaceful your house was, though, you were sure you’d seen Alexia's car in the drive.

“Ale! Love!, ¡Estoy en casa! Come help me unpack!” You shouted into your empty kitchen, back turned to your living room, you had a few hours before the show was on air, “I got that ice-cream you like! I know it gives you a tummy ache sometimes but don’t worry, I'll rub your tummy how you like afte…”

“Amor!”

You turned around at the panic in her voice, “Wha–”

“SURPRISE!”

Ale stood in your living area, face reddening, surrounded by her closest Barca teammates as well as Mario, his ever pregnant wife and his kids, your mum and brother as well as Eli and Alba. Everyone comically in paper party hats and some lop-sided bunting was up above your couch,

“HOPE YOU BEAT THE BEAR SNAKE!” it read, and you immediately knew who was on the decoration committee.

You jumped in surprise, dropping the ice cream and immediately ran into your mum's open arms, “Mum! You’re here!” you squealed into her neck, hiding the tears that had appeared in her presence.

“I am, love. Alexia literally wouldn’t let us refuse the flight. She pretended she didn’t understand English when we tried to at least pay for it. And you know I have a 265 day streak on duolingo but my accent must need work because she didn’t understand my Spanish.”

You pulled yourself from her neck with a wet laugh and transferred yourself into your wifes open and familiar strong arms. “Aleeee” you whined. She knew you meant thank you. And I love you. And you mean the world to me. But you were too British to do that infront of people.

“You need to stop pretending you don’t speak English when you don’t like what you hear.” you muttered without malice after placing a kiss below her ear.

“I know amor. I love you too. And your family needed to be here for your big moment! You couldn’t miss this with them because of me. And then also. Mapi happened and now we’re having a viewing party! There's a cake!”

“And Ice Cream Ale! Don’t worry, I’ve saved it! Though we don’t want your barriga to hu-” Mapi stands the space you'd just vacated holding up the abandoned and slightly battered carton of ice cream. She's stopped from her gleeful teasing by Ingrid covering her entire face with one big palm.

“We wanted to be here to support you.” Ingrid interrupted her girlfriend, addressing you kindly.

“We all did!” you hear from Alba in the back, already tucking into the buffet set up on the coffee table, paper hat skew-whiff on her head. You have never felt so loved. It was perfect.

—-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“So, when are you going to tell her you’re ready for them?”

You are brought out of your daydream by Ingrid sidling up to you and addressing you with her familiar soft lilt.

“Huh?”

She doesn’t reply vocally, just nods her head towards your wife, who is currently having a very intense game of 2v2 in your garden with 2 of Marios youngest and Mapi.

The kids little legs making them toddle around after the small ball adorably, Mapi and Ale giving soft touches they would easily catch up with.

You can’t help but laugh out loud as Ale takes Mapi by surprise and takes a shot against her hard, the ball catching her bare thigh in a manner which must have left a sting much to the small Spaniard's disdain.

Her and the two kids start to chase Alexia around the garden, dramatically tackling her as she suddenly becomes some sort of football monster, rolling around and blowing raspberries on their stomachs as Mapi cheers her toddler army on from the sidelines.

You feel another knock against your arm, dislodging your hand which is supporting your head as you lean over the breakfast bar facing the garden. Lovesick looks clearly on your face, going off Ingrid's coy smile.

“You know, barn. Kids. Munchkins…”

“Yeah, Yeah I get it Ingrid…” you steal another look outside at your more-often-than-not-stern wife getting grass stains on her comfy shorts for the entertainment of your best friends' kids, suddenly you feel like being really really honest. You turn to Ingrid with a shy smile of your own, “soon.”

Her face lights up, teeth on display unable to disguise her smile. “Yeah?” she asks, before turning to look towards the garden, “Me too.”

You smile to yourself and drop your head onto the dark haired girl's shoulder, you both taking a moment to watch your partners play with the kids. The moment is ruined by your mum mussing up your hair on her way past,

“Come on Love, we need to wrangle these last-minute spaniards, it starts in 10 minutes!”

She had a point to be fair. A very chaotic 8 minutes later you practically push Eli into her seat on the couch after she tries to get another plate full of food for Mario’s wife, “¡Está llena de Eli! ella esta embarazada no tiene hambre!” you cheekily remind her, your wife looking up at you from her place on the floor with tender eyes.

“And you…” you turn your attention towards her as you make your way to your seat, “get up here.” you demand, patting the empty space next to you.

“I’m bueno down here Mi Amor, me and Bruno can watch from down here.” she insists. the 4 year old of Marios nestled on her stomach, her arms wrapped around his sleeping form where he attached himself to her after being forced back inside.

You hesitate for a moment, not watching to make a scene or be too needy in front of all your closest family and friends, but you knew that Ale would need to be within touching distance of you in the next hour. 

You’re about to make your peace with it when Mario glaces your way. You and Mario have worked together for years. Years before you met Ale and the girls.

You’ve battled more than just bears together. Weeks spent isolated in the mountains. And a bond like that means that you can communicate with just a look.

With just that glance he’s up and pulling his toddler into his own burley arms. Bruno remaining in his deep sleep through the change.

“I’ve got el monstruo Ale. Go sit with your wife."

She doesn’t need any more direction, the small interaction is subtle and missed by everyone, except your brother who sends you an exaggerated puppy dog look.

“Fuck off” you throw at him, finger in the air, quickly grabbed by Alexia, “Hey, I thought you wanted me to sit here!” she teases, sending your brother a wink.

“Stop ganging up on me…!” you’re about to protest further before you’re shushed by Mapi, of all people, sitting on the floor between Ingrid's legs who sits on the couch above her. “It's about to start!”

She has a point, a familiar British accent fills the living room, Spanish subtitles appearing on the bottom of the screen for the Spanish contingent. Bear’s voice is as dramatic as ever, long sweeping scenes fill the screen of intense jungle, a crocodile and an action shot of a snake thrown in for good measure.

“Serpiente!” Mapi shouts, pointing at the screen, before Ingrid hushes her and pulls her back against her legs. 

           “We all know by now that humans are masters of the jungle. But the unanswered question remains. Is it the King, or Queen of the Jungle? Find out tonight in Man V Woman.”

The title fills the screen with a dramatic crescendo of music. Your friends and family whooping as though it's the champions league final. Alexia barely contains her excitement next to you. You had been steadfast in your refusal to tell anyone the outcome.

The next shot is a recognisable one, the sound of trees being hacked with a machete accompanies a close up of a muddy puddle set deep in the jungle, until the water is disturbed by a ever-familiar battered boot stomping in the puddle, blaugrana laces pulled tight, as proudly as ever.

This prompts another wild round of jeering from the crowd around you as the camera pans out and reveals your full profile as Alexia places a loving kiss onto your shoulder, “That's my wife!” she shouts, proudly, making you laugh. 

Bear's voice over continues as you pull Alexia's hand into yours, half pulling her on top of you, she gives you a peculiar look, this being more PDA than you would usually allow in front of your English family, but she goes with it, too full of pride to be worried otherwise.

As the voiceover continues, highlights of your career flash across the screen to introduce you to the audience.

Mountains in Peru, Arctic Explorations, Treks across Siberia, all flash across the screen, mixed in with childhood pictures your mum must have supplied painting a picture of your career so far and your expertise in your career.

The music turns more dramatic as you shift uncomfortably, being the only one to realise in the room what's about to happen.

A picture of you smiling with Arjan at the peak of Everest, ice picks raised proudly in the air. You feel Alexia stiffen on your lap, ever so subtly. Stock footage of snow hurling down a mountain as Bear describes the avalanche you got trapped in.

He gives out stats and figures to heighten the drama… “your chance of survival drops 3% every minute you are trapped after the first 15 minutes… being trapped for 2 days… our guest star did the unthinkable…”

The room is bathed in a white light as the screen changes. Camera shaky and audio changing to the shouts and heavy breaths of whoever the body worn camera is strapped too. “Yahām̐, Yahām̐, she is here!”

The camera catches Arjan digging desperately, it's clear now the camera is strapped to a rescuer on the slopes of Everest, the TV production company having access to the footage through a sister company who were filming a documentary about altitude rescue at the time.

It shakes as the man helps dig, grunts of exertion as the spade digs desperately. A flash of colour and your snow suit is revealed, face pressed up against the rock you had found shelter near.

Arjan clears snow from your face desperately and puts his head close to yours, “She’s breathing!” he pulls you up and your hand, satellite phone frozen in place, falls from the side of your ghostly white face as the camera fades out.

The whole segment couldn’t have lasted more than 32 seconds. But it had felt like time had slowed. You could feel from her placement on you that Alexia hadn’t taken a breath. Her eyes remained wide as she stared at the screen.

There was a heaviness in the room around you. 

The voiceover continued, explaining the challenge to the audience but the silence continued. Eli glances at her daughter worriedly, every few seconds.

Just as you thought the tension couldn’t get any more intense… “That's what Alexia looks like when she visits England for Christmas and mum won’t let us put the heating on.” your brother jokes, awkwardly, a crooked smile on his boyish face. 

The room is silent, your mum hiding a smile behind a hand only you notice. He goes to speak again, probably to apologise when-

Alexias' laugh shocks even you, bubbling up from deep within her chest. She closes her eyes, a stray tear escaping at the pressure. Laugh still rumbling deep in her chest, slowly the room joins in, as though they’ve been given permission, and soon your in a choir of laughing spectators, your brother blushing deep red at the attention.

“Thank you” you mouth to him across the room, as you wrap your hands around your wife, whos body still shakes with the odd giggle.

He tips an imaginary hat at you in return.

Because he is an idiot.

The challenge begins, unhelpfully, with you throwing yourself out of a helicopter into the rainforest, “Oh Dios Mio” she mumbles, heard subtly under Mapis, “Cool!”.

You press your lips against her shoulder again and mutter into her skin; “I am here, I am warm, I am Safe.” Like a mantra, you feel her nod and grip your hand tighter.

The thing about being in the environment completely opposite to an avalanche inducing mountain range, was that it was hot. Hot and wet. The camera follows both you and Bear as you struggle through the elements seperatly, deciding when to camp down and preserve energy and when to try to gain more miles.

Bear goes hard, and Mapi looks up at you aghast as you decide to build a shelter and bunker down for seven days straight. The heat zapping any energy you had.

“What are you doing! It's a race!” she exclaims, to which you laugh and zip your mouth closed with your fingers, cocking an eyebrow at her as she eagerly looks back towards the TV like a small child.

You spend two days collecting water and, seemingly, according to Mapi, wasting time cutting palm leaves and collecting bark to make twine. Meanwhile Bear is hacking down trees, making spears out of sticks and rock and throwing himself at seemingly anything that would give him a bit of protein on the move.

You’ve ridden yourself of most of your clothing due to the heat. Smothering yourself in mud from the riverbank you were camped next to, you explain to the camera its sun-cream qualities and how it’s safer than clothing as it also protects you from dehydration. 

All the while you weave and weave and weave your leaves together, quietly, assuredly.

You explain to the camera; “I am a master weaver. My wife likes it when I plait her hair. Alot. She’s cute. Sorry Ale.” you wink at the camera as your wife groans on your lap and  her teammates start to tease her, “Amor! Why!”

“Now. Let's see how this works!”  you grin and pull up a large basket to the camera.

The screen shows you scantily dressed, boots safely on a rock in the background, in the river, moving twigs into position to make a run for the fish to swim directly into your basket.

You explain the contraception, set some bait and say your goodnights to the camera, crossing your fingers for a full basket in the morning.

Cheerful music begins as the camera fades back into your campfire, fish on a stick roasting and cooking heavenly, your muddied but smiling face coming into view.

“Bear can eat his roaches and drink his wee. I’ll be here with my fish buffet!” You joke, under your shelter, camera panning to tens of fish in your basket waiting to be smoked.

The next scene shows Bear explaining the protein benefits and the unusual flavours of a witchetty grub as he struggles against the rainstorm. 

The music begins to ramp up. Graphics on the screen showing both of your progress. Bear has made much more progress than you. But struggling physically. He’s developed a terrible case of trench foot but was still making steady progress with his machete.

You chose to travel up the river. Walking along its bed you are able to make more direct progress, but it’s more energy draining wading through water. You have, however, had a relatively strong diet over the last 3 weeks.

You’re sitting on the river bed, tending to your basket of smoked fish you’re carrying with you for energy when you suddenly remain completely stock still. Dramatic music begins. Your head raises subtly and then out of nowhere.

“Serpentine!”

A snake strikes at you from the shallows, clearly after your basket, or you, or whatever it can get its fangs in. You react quickly, crouching down to your knees, keeping a low centre of gravity to keep your balance as your right hand reaches into the shallows.

You and the snake strike at the same time, and you throw yourself to the side as you bash a jagged rock against its head.

The next scene shows you taking a mouthful of grilled snake; “Tastes like chicken!” you joke at the camera. Before popping a piece of charred snake skin into your mouth.

You feel Alexia shudder in your arms.

"I'm never kissing you again" she lies.

Mapi slowly turns around, mouth agape, gobsmacked look on her face. “Snake!” she whispers, in disbelief. “You beat a snake!” You can’t help but laugh and lean over to turn her head back to the TV.

“Told you you’d find everything out tonta.”

The map on screen shows the last day of the challenge, Bear's voice over explaining distances to the muster points, as well as geographical challenges. The screen swaps quickly between the two of you, running, climbing and swimming to where you both believed the finish line to be.

You were making good progress, as was Bear.

A close up of a Brazilian flag on the edge of a waterfall.

A close up of you throwing yourself into the river.

Bear gripping a cliff edge and heaving himself up. The camera shows the bottom of the flag pole as he pulls himself up. The camera pans up. And the flagpole is bare.

The screen changes to you.

Standing, still relatively scantily clad in your battered boots, your hiking shorts cut down to short-shorts and thin vest muddied and holey, fish blood staining your arms,holding the flag proudly up in one arm.

The room around you erupts. “She did it!” “¡Jefe de la Jungla!!!!” “I always knew!”, “She killed a snake!”. You find yourself at the bottom of a pile of bodies as Alexia's teammates celebrate in the way they know how. Which is apparently to throw themselves at you in a pile up.

“That's my wife!” Alexia chants proudly from within the pile, laughing gleefully, all earlier angst forgotten.

The screen goes blank, and the image shows you and Bear embracing, laughing as the voiceover continues; “... at least this time. It's a Queen of the jungle… or should I say. La Reina de la Jungla.” Bear quips, as Alexia groans, forever hating her nickname, and the screen cuts to black.

—--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It’s hours later, many more plates of food, celebration toasts and questions from Mapi about the snake later. That you're finally in the quiet of your bedroom in your wife's arms.

Your mum and brother are set up in the spare rooms and you have all got plans to meet up with the Alexias family at the game tomorrow before going out for a meal.

Your head is settled on her chest as she plays on her phone above you, struggling to calm down from the evening's events, and as usual, struggling to sleep before a game.  You play with her wedding ring on her spare hand. Feeling the cool metal beneath against her warm skin.

You feel her swipe furiously through her phone, getting more agitated as time passes, grumbles that are not-quite words emitting from her chest.

“Hey. Love.” you sit up and pull her phone away. “What's the matter?”

“Nothing.” she replies, bottom lip out in a pout, pulling her phone back into her hand.

“It’s not nothing. Tell me.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Alexia.” you sigh, “We aren't doing this.. What's got you so…” you look down onto her phone and see. Yourself? It's her tiktok open and you see an edit of the show being played over… “Hot Stuff? Ale. What's this?” you glance at the comments section and see a selection from seemingly anon accounts;  

‘I have never understood Alexia more’, ‘I wonder who calls who capi.’ ,‘Capi, your wife's thighs are bigger than yours’.

“Nothing!” she grabs her phone back from your grip… you arch an eyebrow at her which crumbles her resolve in 3…2…

“Fine! It's all over my TikTok.  The comments about you. The fans have made these edits. Of you! All, wet and… muscley and… nearly undressed.”

“And you…don’t… like me wet, and muscled and… naked? Cause, love, I have evidenced otherwis…”

“Shut up! Of course I do but you're mine!”

Oh. Realisation dawns on you and you can’t help but smile.

“Don’t laugh!” she grumbles. “You’re jealous….” you tease in a sing-song voice. “I am not jealous!” she insists, “It's just… tu eres mio! And these people are all looking at you”.

“I am,” you agree, with a smile. “But, love. Try being married to Alexia Putellas. Maybe you’ll keep your shirt on at games now.” you tease, making her smile and roll her eyes.

Eyes softening as you pull her phone from her grip and plug it in for her. Settling back into her chest, nuzzling against the warm skin you find there.

“I am so proud of you.” she whispers into the now dark room, placing a kiss on your head. The moment became more serious and tender.

“I love you” you reply, softly, the moment feels weighted, and you’re not sure what makes you do it. Maybe it's the adrenaline of the evening, having completed your life's ambition, or maybe it's the wine you drank.

Though, really, you know it's because of the images of your lanky wife curling herself onto the rug in the living room because Bruno had decided she was the world's best pillow again. But you can’t stop yourself.

“Ale. I want to have kids with you.”

Her hand stops its movement in your hair and she rushes over to turn the bedside lamp back on.

“Que?” she breathes out. Hands finding their place softly on your cheeks, a look of urgency in her eyes.

“I want us to have kids. Me and you. I want that with you. Is that something you’re ready for?” you whisper, eyes looking deeply into hers.

“En serio?” she asks, as though she's afraid of the answer.

You nod in response. Moving your hand to wipe away the tears that have appeared on her cheeks.

“Sí, Mi Amor. Quiero eso contigo. Mucho.”

You're both smiling too much to kiss, but you make a good go of it anyway. And as you bury yourself into your wife's arms. Hands roaming and adrenaline of a decision made rushing through your body you can't help but think.

This is the beginning of the biggest adventure of your life. 

[fandomshatewomen]

Is it not possible in a society where women are being killed, raped, drugged, and black women are already overly sexualized by media and treated like sex objects (especially as children) which has gotten even worse in the last 16-20+ years; that he is looking at the fact that if something were to happen to her he would feel as though he could have prevented it?  That’s a lot of guilt to carry.

The fucked up thing here is you know god damn well he wasn’t telling her to change because he was afraid something was gonna happen to her. He didn’t want anyone else looking at his girl. Emphasis on his. Like he’s got some ownership or like she’s responsible for the people looking at her. Let’s stop acting like the majority of our men would say that because he’s scared for her safety. It’s a lie and there’s no point to it. 

Also no matter what a woman wears she can still get raped, same goes for a kid. Like I doubt you’re gonna be like “babe just don’t go outside it’s safe here” I mean that would stop pretty much all the chances of something happening to her. Because

In no way shape or form is this video okay. Sure it might get a couple laughs...but then there’s people like you who besides the “break your spine” comment think this behavior is fine. 

It’s not. It’s controlling and abusive. 

“Sundress season for you hoes but not my bae"😂

[midnite-c6]

thanos and namgyu putting your bed in between theirs 🙏🙏 even if you chose to stop playing the game they are still making you go to the circle side to sleep and perhaps that night they could change your mind about the next time you vote..

this trope is js the best fr in another life im an X picker and these two teach me to b obedient to their requests💔

thanos & nam-gyu imagine !!!!!! pt. 3 💓

this is pretty dark guys sorr✌🏻

soooo, they're literally like dogs tryna chase you, even to as forcing you to be next to them : "shitheads, no matter what, i'm still gonna pick X. i'm not gonna be easily convinced." you tell them firsthand, and they both laugh to themselves

"she obviously won't listen to us, you think her stupid brain could handle it?" nam-gyu complained to thanos, annoyed by how thanos was so persistent in making you switch sides. you scoff since he wasn't so quiet in saying that either, "hey, fuck you, you think I'M stupid enough to play again? don't wanna die than-" "shut up, cunt." nam-gyu cuts you off, placing his hand on your mouth to shut you up, the cold metal of his ring grazing your warm skin. your instant reaction was to bite him, "agh- i'll fucking kill y-" "calm down! everybody chiiiillllll." thanos, like a saviour, stopped nam-gyu from hitting you. "i'm sure we can all have a fair agreement, everybody gets what they want. right, pretty?" thanos turned to look at you, pushing his face awfully close to yours. "and what i want iss.... you." he stares directly into your eyes, that creepy smirk with eyes you KNOW isn't sober at all.

"you could scream and cry all you want, but you know noone in this room would be bothered to help you, girl." nam-gyu whispers into your ears whilst thanos carries you to the bathroom..

nsfw beloww ＼⁠(⁠^⁠o⁠^⁠)⁠／ ->

you were now naked, your sweaty body laying on the filthy bathroom floor, noone could hear your cries for help when nam-gyu's cock forces you to deepthroat him, his hand pulling on your hair to further be balls-deep inside your mouth.. you'd choke on him, saliva dripping all over his dick and your chin. you couldn't scream... and you couldn't fight it either, if it weren't for thanos' stupid, rough hands wrapped around your arms, pinning them to the ground, your legs placed on his shoulders as his tongue laps up and down your folds.. you try your best to wiggle away (even tho its impossible) and thanos notices, "don't even.. don't even try to pretend, baby." you could feel him smile against your pussy, that sensation leaving you to moan against nam-gyu's cock. "been trying to suck in all your juices, pretty, and.. they just keep comin' out..." thanos mocks in a baby voice, "you're dripping... so you're actually a slut...a whore, huuhhh, not that cool, confident typa girl?" you cry, but.. why did you like the sensation? his warm tongue in and out of your cunt. at this point, the ecstacy that was in his mouth was getting your pussy high. "m'not into whores like you," thanos frowns and slides his' tongue up against your clit, biting it harshly, which made you yelp in pain, causing you to lightly bite nam-gyu's dick. he hissed, roughly slapping your face. "bitch!" he pulls your hair to face you, "do that one more fucking time and i'll speeden up your death, fuck." thanos' fingers came on cue, middle and ring finger plunging inside you, making you speechless, mouth open to nam-gyu's comment. he just takes it as an invitation to stuff your mouth again, leaving a low groan at the action.

"y'know dude,," thanos looks up at nam-gyu, "maybe we should keep her, after we win." nam-gyu scoffed, flicking your forehead, "you think you deserve to live, huh?" thanos chuckled, rubbing his fingers against your clit, he doesn't care if it felt good, you were just a toy afterall, "think about it.. she feels good, right? she'll be good for in the long run, trust me, man." "pft." "trust me! her cunts still tight, anyway, right princessssss?" your visions blurry, your will to live gone, still, atleast you're useful to someone or two, two of the most evilest dumbasses you'll ever encounter in your life.

[yutarot]

ride or die. l.jn smau

017 — when it comes to you.

JENO POV

in all honesty, jeno has no idea what he was going to say when he finally met face to face with jaemin. this past week he has been going over and over it in his head, each and every detail, but nothing at all makes sense. why would jaemin, his longest and closest friend, openly admit to doing something like that. jeno didn’t know whether to be angry or confused, or maybe even a little bit of both. but all he knew was that he needed to speak to him. not just for his own piece of mind, but jaemins too. there was something he needs to know too, and it’s been killing jeno that he can’t speak to his closest friend.

especially when it comes to this. especially when it comes to you.

as he sits in the apartment lobby, staring mindlessly down at his shoes, jeno can do nothing but anticipate the feeling of his gut twisting when he sees jaemin come out of the elevator. and god how it flips in his chest when he finally sees him standing there, an apologetic smile on his face.

but jeno doesn’t know why jaemin could possibly be sorry.

“hi.” jaemin says.

jeno stands. “hi.”

he can’t think of what to say, what to do. so he just lets jaemin lead the conversation.

“how are you?” jaemin asks, knowing the answer.

“been better.”

jaemin sighs, guilt ruining him.

he gets straight to it, almost pleading with him. “i wanted to tell you.” he pauses, “i wanted to tell you everything. but if i missed my opportunity…”

“opportunity?” jeno’s eyes squint in confusion. “what opportunity?”

“to tell her i like her.”

jeno freezes, every inch of his body tensing. he didn’t know what to expect from jaemin, but it definitely wasn’t this. but and as the next words leave his mouth, it all makes sense.

every piece of the puzzle that jeno has been trying to decipher finally falls into place.

“it wasn’t me who leaked your identity, jeno.”

of course it wasn’t.

the air between them thickens, becomes a fog that neither of them can see through.

jaemin continues. “i just-“

jeno can’t help it, he speaks his mind, finishing what jaemin wants to say. he knows him too well. “you just wanted her, and you thought a big act like that would make her fall for you?” jeno says, placing the final piece in its correct place. amongst all of this, all the lying, all the betrayal, it had been all because of a simple sentance.

‘you really like me that much that you wanted to ruin jeno’s career?’

that’s what you had said to chenle in that tweet where you had confronted him when you thought he was the real culprit, that’s what jaemin had foolishly misread. he thought you said it out of surprise, out of adoration. not out of disgust. he hadn’t even made it to the end of the tweet before he had made up his mind, before he decided he was going to falsely admit it was him.

“yeah… it didn’t take me long before i realised i had misread it..” jaemin laughs nervously, closer to wanting to cry than he’s ever seemed. jeno doesn’t blame him, he’s been watching him closely, every comment made from the group hurting him just as much as it had hurt jaemin.

“you’re an idiot.” jeno says. he wants to punch him, make him pay for all the worrying he had made him do, all the hours lying on his friend jungwoo’s sofa, scared about going back to his dorm, scared about going to his dads. but jaemin wasn’t the one who exposed him.

although jeno knew that all along.

“i know i am.” jaemin laughs, “but can you blame me.”

weirdly, jeno can’t. it’s you. he’s seen the way you laugh, he’s seen the way you stuck up for him despite being unsure of why. and something deep in his chest aches at the way jaemin talks about you like he shouldn’t understand. but jeno does, he understands it the most. and he hates himself for it.

because that’s what he did all this for.

he did it for you.

“jaemin.”

jaemins laugher pauses when he notices the tone of jeno’s words. he’s being serious.

“yeah?” he asks.

“there’s something i need to tell you.”

jaemins head tilts. “what is it?”

jeno takes a deep breath, deciding that if he doesn’t tell jaemin now, he fears he never will. and despite jaemins feelings, he doesn’t have a choice. he looks at him, really looks at him, searching for an ounce of uncertainty and finding way too much of it. but he has to do this, it all had to have been worth it. all of it.

so he says it.

“i know who leaked my secret.”

previous : mlist : next

notes; 😆

taglist — open! @jenohyun @jirsungs @do-you-remember-summer-127 @ddolbyong @stqrgr7 @thatsatricky1 @sunghoonsgfreal @nattan127 @ssweetreveries @flamingi @chenlesfavorite @peterm4rker @snoopyjimin @akunoeyebrows @junviadinho @slayhaechan @f6llsun @multifandomania @cookiehaos @catecita @mrsjohnnysuh @luv4jeno @hyuckies18 @dreamiestay @tangerinelovelees @jjaegyeom @https-yeonjun @nanaxwi @yukisroom97 @nosungluv @mrkleelvr @neocrashed @jaedgemental @apolloxxivmin @kyubing @catdonut657 @dudekiss3r @juyeonshour @hamjwis @antifrggile @mmjhh1998 @thegracerammy @jenocity23 @honeynanamin @bluedbliss @lampcults @yyangj3lly

[sunni-stuff]

People are judgmental. Some think they aren't, others don't mean to be, and then there are those who do it on purpose and simply don't care.

Parents are guilty of this.

Parents who pay you to teach their kids do this.

But the worst offenders?

Wives. 

Particularly those with too much free time—gossiping Gertrude's who'd rather nitpick and judge than deal with the boredom of daytime TV and their kids screaming in the background. You’ve dealt with a handful before—a crack in the system that always rippled right under your skin whenever one of those vultures threw out a backhanded compliment.  

“You’re so patient with the kids. I could never do what you do—how do you even manage?”  

“Must be nice having all that time off during the summer. A little vacation every year, huh?”  

“Teaching must be so rewarding. Though I imagine it’s not really about the money, is it?”  

Each one, a subtle dig disguised as flattery, like they couldn’t help but twist the knife just a little deeper. 

If there was one thing you’d learned about this job, it was to always kill them with kindness. The rumor mill among parents was ruthless, and the wrong rumor could ripple out and jeopardize your career. So, you’d mastered the art of the polite smile, the well-timed thank you, and the effortless small talk. It was a strategy that had served you well, keeping any overly curious mothers at bay.

Still, these women were relentless. They circled like hawks, always looking for an opening to pry into your life or make veiled comments about your parenting. You’d never given them the satisfaction of slipping up—until the day you almost did.

The sun was setting, the air brisk and tinged with the promise of winter as parents gathered their children. Little voices chattered away as teachers handed over day charts, neatly summarizing each child’s activities. Standing at the cubbies, you were bundling up Adira. Her small frame was snug in her sweater, jacket zipped up to her chin, and scarf tucked securely around her neck. She fidgeted as you worked, barely able to stay still with how much excitement bubbled in her tiny frame.

Her voice was high-pitched and animated as she launched into a story, her words tumbling over each other in her eagerness to share. “Messy man said, we play trains when he comes back!” she chirped, her dark eyes wide with delight.

You paused, your fingers lingering on the last button of her jacket. A soft smile tugged at your lips as you straightened her scarf. “Oh, did he now?”

Adira nodded vigorously, her curls bouncing. “Yep! He said, “Adira, we make the best train track ever!” Her imitation of Simon’s deep voice was laughably exaggerated, and you couldn’t help but chuckle.” We gonna play with the biiig track!” She spread her arms wide for emphasis, nearly toppling over from the effort.

The mention of Simon was enough to draw some attention from the other parents nearby. You could feel their eyes darting your way, their curiosity almost palpable. Simon’s occasional appearances to pick up Adira hadn’t gone unnoticed, and the whispers had already started. Who was this tall, broad man with a thick accent? Was he Adira’s father? A boyfriend? The air was thick with silent speculation.

Ignoring the countless eyes and ears listening in on your harmless conversation, you assured Adira. “Well, if messy man promised, he’ll keep it,” Simon had made it clear that he intended to be a constant presence in Adira’s life, and so far, he’d stuck to his word.

As you stood and picked up her small bag, a sharp voice interrupted the moment.

"Well, aren’t you just the picture-perfect little family?”

Your polite smile returned instantly, masking the irritation that flared at the condescending tone. Turning, you saw one of the daycare moms—Linda, if you remembered correctly—standing there with her perfectly manicured nails wrapped around her designer purse. Her son trailed behind her, nose buried in a tablet.

“Evening, Linda,” you said evenly, keeping your tone light. “How’s Ethan doing?

She waved a dismissive hand, her eyes already scanning Adira with that overly curious gaze that made your skin crawl. “Oh, he’s fine. But I couldn’t help overhearing... this ‘Messy man’ your little one mentioned. Is he... new in your life?”

Ah, there it was—the opening she was fishing for. 

Adira, oblivious to the undercurrents of adult conversation, grinned up at Linda uncharacteristically, the joy she felt for Simon completely expunging her normal glaring behavior. “Messy man makes pancakes! But they go splat!” She threw her hands out dramatically, mimicking the chaos Simon often caused in the kitchen.

Goddammit, poor Adira revealed too much to the wrong person, and you could already see the cogs turning in Linda's head. Forcing a chuckle, you reached for Adira’s hand. “Messy man is her nickname for Simon, her dad. He’s stationed overseas, so she gets pretty excited when he’s home.”

Linda’s perfectly arched eyebrow lifted slightly, clearly surprised. “Oh, I see. Military man, huh? I suppose that explains why we’ve never seen him around.”

You gave Linda your most neutral expression, taking notice of the other moms matching from behind her. “He’s been busy, but he’s doing his best to be here when he can.”

"Oh, I see. I simply would've never guessed you were married. You never wear a ring," Linda remarked, her tone dripping with subtle judgment.

You knew what she was doing. It was a carefully laid trap, baited to catch you in a corner. If you rebuffed her comment, if you made a scene, it would only give her more ammunition to spread rumors. These women didn’t care for nuances; they thrived on gossip, and the topic of marriage—or rather, the lack of a visible wedding ring—would be a field day for them. They’d ride that horse straight to hell, and you'd be left cleaning up the mess.

With the growing number of parents in earshot, you understood that this wasn’t just a comment; it was a test. You had to choose your words carefully. It wasn’t just about keeping things smooth in the moment—it was about protecting your future.

You gave a small, practiced smile, maintaining your composure as you slipped Adira’s bag onto your shoulder. “I don’t wear my ring because I work with children. It could get caught in their hair, or worse, I could lose it.” You met her gaze with a calm confidence that bordered on dismissive.

“That’s understandable, dear. We all have kids after all!” Lina laughed, her tone attempting to sound warm and genuine, but it was too polished, too forced. The laughter rang hollow, like a poorly executed attempt to mask her true intentions. “Does this mean we’ll finally get to meet him at the fundraiser this weekend? We’ve all been here for so long, and not a single glimpse of your beloved other half. Right, ladies?”

Her words floated in the air, sharp with insinuation. The smile she wore was one of practiced sweetness, but the glint in her eyes was anything but kind. She knew what she was doing—attempting to pull you further into her web, hoping to get a reaction that would either reveal more or, better yet, give her ammunition to fuel the rumors she clearly wanted to start.

A few of the other women murmured in agreement, their eyes flicking from you to each other, already whispering amongst themselves. They were all waiting for a response, and the pressure began to build in the pit of your stomach.

“Yes, he is.” The words slipped out of your mouth before you could even process them, your own response surprising you as much as it did the group of wives surrounding you. You felt a jolt in your chest, your heart picking up pace as the reality of what you had just said began to sink in. What the fuck did you just do?

The laughter from Linda faltered for a split second, her eyes narrowing slightly as she processed your words. The others exchanged glances, some of their faces lighting up with an almost predatory curiosity, while others masked their thoughts behind polite smiles. You could almost hear the gears turning in their heads—oh, this was going to be something they could use.

The tension in the air thickened, and you suddenly felt exposed, as if every secret you’d carefully kept tucked away was now dangling on the edge of a cliff. You’d just handed them the perfect piece of gossip, but what would it lead to? Would they use it against you, twist it into something worse? You hadn’t planned for any of this—hell, you hadn't even planned on saying anything at all—but now that it was out there, you had to somehow steer this conversation. 

You had to control the narrative, or risk letting it spiral completely out of your hands. 

Your mind races, trying to formulate a response, but everything seems so loud—your thoughts, the laughter, the eyes watching you. How could you backpedal without it seeming like a lie? How could you walk that fine line between the truth and keeping your personal life hidden?

"Yes, Simon’s coming," you added quickly, trying to steady your breath. "But, you know... he’s not really into the whole fundraiser thing. He’s more of a stay-at-home guy, a bit of a quiet one, really. I’ll be there though, and we’re looking forward to it." You tried to sound casual, but the flicker of doubt in your voice betrayed you. 

The women around you didn’t miss a beat, though. The moment had been set, and now it was only a matter of what they would do with the information. 

“Well, I look forward to seeing you.” Lina’s voice was dripping with a false sweetness, and you could feel the weight of her gaze as she gave you one last look. Her eyes lingered a bit longer than necessary, as if trying to peel back layers, searching for some crack to exploit. Then, with a nod, she steered Ethan away, her entourage of women following closely behind, their chatter rising in the air like a distant murmur. The click of their heels echoed as they disappeared down the hall, leaving you standing there, frozen in place.

"And so, that's what happened," you finished, your voice trailing off as you leaned against the kitchen counter, trying to gauge Simon's reaction.

Simon blinked up at you from where he was sitting on the floor, his focus still mostly on Adira, who was happily arranging her toy train with her blocks, making a makeshift kingdom. He didn’t seem phased, just a little confused. "You want me to pretend to be your husband?"

The question hung in the air for a moment before he let out a chuckle, shaking his head slightly, his eyes filled with that familiar warmth. "Out of all the things I've done in my life, this has to be the funniest, love.”

You blinked, momentarily thrown by the unexpected nickname. It felt oddly intimate, a shift in the dynamic between you and Simon that you hadn’t anticipated. Love. It wasn't what you'd expected to hear from him, not in this context, not when everything felt so messy and uncertain. But there it was, slipping out so naturally from him, like he'd always called you that, like he'd been in your life much longer than he really had.

Your heart skipped a beat, the sound of Adira’s laughter in the background making the moment feel surreal. It should have been funny—this whole situation, with you essentially asking Simon to pretend to be your husband for the sake of those gossiping women. But instead, you felt something else, something soft and unfamiliar tightening in your chest.

“Did you just call me that?” You couldn't help but ask, your voice a little quieter than you intended.

Simon paused, his playful smile faltering for a second as he caught the look on your face. “I—yeah, I guess I did,” he replied, his tone a touch more uncertain now. He glanced down at Adira, who was happily stacking blocks at his feet, then back to you. “It was just a slip of the tongue. Didn’t mean anything weird by it.”

“I’m not exactly husband material, you know,” he added lightly, his voice teasing. “I’m more of a... messy man.”

You chuckled at that, shaking your head. "A messy man, huh?"

He nodded, grinning. “Yeah, but I’m good at it. Just ask Adira.”

Adira, hearing her name, immediately let out a squeal of approval. “Messy man!” she giggled, throwing a block in Simon’s direction, her tiny hand pointing at him with delight.

"So, what's the plan here then?" That easy grin back on his face, his eyes still dancing with humor, but there was something underneath it—something you couldn’t quite place. “You want me to just walk into a room and act like we’re a picture-perfect couple?”

The way he said it made you laugh a little, though there was a slight edge of uncertainty to it. You found yourself shifting uncomfortably, knowing you had no real plan for what came next. It wasn’t like you had a relationship with Simon beyond the occasional dinner and time spent with Adira, and yet, here you were, asking him to play a role in your life, one that might end up blurring lines you didn’t fully understand.

“Well, you don’t have to pretend, exactly,” you said, running a hand through your hair, suddenly feeling all the weight of the day settling in. “I just... I just need you to be there. You know, to back me up, to—” You paused, glancing over at Simon again. “I guess I just don’t want them thinking I’m alone in all of this. It’s bad enough that has already started.”

Simon’s gaze softened as he leaned back in his seat, watching you with a quiet understanding. "You're not alone in this," he said, his voice steady. “And I’m here. You don’t need a ring or a title for that.”

The sincerity in his tone made your chest tighten again, but this time it was different. His words weren’t a joke or a half-hearted attempt to make you feel better—they were real. He was offering something more than just pretending for the sake of others. He was offering his presence, his support.

For a moment, you forgot about everything else. The plans, the expectations, the pressure. Instead, all that mattered was Simon sitting across from you, smiling at you like you weren't asking for something too much, like it wasn’t strange to think of him in your life like this.

“Thank you,” you murmured. "Really."

He gave a small nod, then grinned, shifting his attention back to Adira, who had managed to get half the blocks stacked to an impressive height. “It’s nothing. Besides, I think Adira’s got the best part of this deal anyway.”

You glanced over at your daughter, who was watching both of you with wide eyes, a smile tugging at her lips. Adira was your source of strength, a beacon that pushed you forward, her smile alone gave you determination.  “Alright, let’s figure out what married people do.”

"I know just who to call." Simon reached for his phone, the battered thing covered in scratches, an old case and sporting a broken screen from a hazardous drop. Upon seeing it, the first thought running through your head was, how the fuck was it still usable?

Price’s living room radiated warmth and history, a perfect mix of domestic coziness and military precision. The centerpiece was a sturdy stone fireplace, its mantle adorned with framed photos of Price and his wife, Melanie. In some, they stood arm in arm at scenic locations; in others, Price was in uniform, the edges of his cap sharp against the backdrop of distant skies. Above the fireplace hung a shadow box displaying medals and insignias, each one polished to a shine, speaking volumes about his service.

Bookshelves lined the walls, filled with everything from military strategy texts to well-worn novels. On one shelf sat a small globe and a model of a Spitfire plane, a nod to his admiration for history. A comfortable, overstuffed armchair, complete with a folded tartan blanket, sat near the fire. The coffee table bore faint scratches, evidence of years of use, and atop it lay an open newspaper, a mug of tea, and a small dish of biscuits.

You sat stiffly on the plush sofa, feeling distinctly out of place amidst this blend of home and honor. The ticking of a grandfather clock in the corner filled the silence as you watched Simon talk to Price in the adjoining kitchen. Occasionally, their eyes flicked toward you, and you pretended not to notice, your gaze wandering instead to a black-and-white photo of a younger Price standing with a group of soldiers, all grinning ear to ear.

The awkwardness of the situation weighed on you like a heavy blanket. This wasn’t exactly how you envisioned your day—asking Price, of all people, to help stage your fake relationship. But you were in too deep now to back out.

In the kitchen, Price rubbed his hand over his mouth, barely concealing the grin that tugged at his lips. A low chuckle escaped as he grabbed a cup of coffee, shaking his head at Simon, who stood across from him, arms folded, his expression far more serious than the moment warranted.

“You want me and Mel to help you two seem like a couple? That right?” Price’s voice carried an unmistakable note of amusement, his words tinged with disbelief.

Simon shifted his weight, rolling his shoulders back, clearly trying to maintain some semblance of dignity. "Yes, that’s the gist of it."

Price’s laughter broke free, a warm, hearty sound that echoed off the kitchen tiles. “Bloody hell, Simon. You’ve seen action all over the world, but this—this is what’s got you nervous?” He clapped a hand on Simon’s shoulder, his grin wide enough to light the room. “You’re in for a treat, mate. Melanie’s going to love this.”

From your seat, you caught Price’s amused glance, and you couldn’t help the way your face heated. This was going to be a long evening.

Price, still chuckling, crossed the room to the wide bay window, pushing it open with ease. The crisp evening air drifted in, carrying with it the scent of freshly cut grass and the faint hum of distant crickets. He leaned out slightly, cupping his hands around his mouth.

“Mel! Come on inside, love. You’ve got to hear this one,” he called, his voice carrying easily over the quiet of their backyard.

From where you sat, you caught a glimpse of Melanie in the garden. She was tending to a neat row of vibrant flowers, her hands gloved and a straw hat perched on her head. At the sound of Price’s voice, she straightened up, brushing dirt off her knees with a curious look on her face.

“Be right there!” she replied, her voice warm and lilting. She removed her gloves, tucking them into her apron pocket as she began making her way toward the house.

Price turned back to Simon, shaking his head in mock disbelief. “You better hope Mel doesn’t laugh you out of the house, mate.”

Simon groaned softly, rubbing his temples. “Thanks for the vote of confidence, Price.”

Moments later, Melanie stepped into the living room, a radiant smile lighting up her face. She was the epitome of grace, her presence immediately softening the room’s atmosphere. Her gaze shifted between you, Simon, and her husband, her curiosity evident.

“What’s all this about, then?” she asked, removing her hat and setting it on a nearby chair. “You’ve got that mischievous look again, John.”

Price grinned, gesturing toward you and Simon. “These two need a favor, Mel. A big one.”

Melanie’s brows lifted as she looked between the two of you. “Oh? Do tell.”

Simon, looking equal parts determined and mortified, cleared his throat. “We... need help convincing a group of nosy parents that we’re married. Long story.”

Melanie’s smile widened as her eyes twinkled with amusement. “Oh, this sounds rich. Go on, I’m listening.”

You shifted in your seat, feeling the warmth of Melanie’s gaze settle on you. Her smile was kind but tinged with unmistakable amusement, and it was clear she was holding back a laugh as she took in your flustered state.

“Well,” you began hesitantly, clasping your hands together in your lap. “It’s a bit of a mess, really. One of the moms at the daycare cornered me, started asking questions about Simon, and… I might’ve let it slip that we’re married. Which we’re not. Obviously.” Your words tumbled out in a rush, and you glanced at Simon for backup. He was rubbing the back of his neck, caught between exasperation and amusement.

Melanie let out a soft laugh and gracefully sat down beside you on the couch. “Ah, I see. And now you need to sell the story before it falls apart. Oh, love, I’ve been in a similar pickle—not quite like this, but close enough.”

“See?” Price chimed in from his armchair, leaning back with an amused grin. “Told you Mel would get a kick out of this.”

Simon shot him a flat look. “Not exactly the reaction I was hoping for, mate.”

Melanie waved a dismissive hand at Price before patting your knee in a reassuring gesture. “Don’t mind him. Now, let’s think this through. If you’re going to convince anyone, you need to act the part. People pick up on the smallest details—how you talk to each other, how comfortable you seem together. If you’re too stiff, they’ll see right through it.”

Simon leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees as he nodded. “Alright, so what do we need to do? We’ve got about a week before the fundraiser, so I’m open to ideas.”

Melanie’s eyes lit up with a mix of mischief and determination. “Perfect. We’ll start with body language—how you interact without saying a word. And then we’ll move on to the conversational stuff. You’ll need to know each other’s habits, quirks, and all those little details married couples just know.”

Price clapped his hands together with mock enthusiasm, a cheeky grin plastered across his face. “Right, then. Let the awkward training sessions begin. This’ll be one for the books.”

You groaned inwardly, glancing between Simon and Melanie. This bizarre charade was only just beginning, and while you couldn’t imagine where it would lead, one thing was clear—you were in for a wild ride.

Happy new years friends! The holidays were a riot and I spent most of it spending time with family instead of writing as I felt kind of burnt out from writing in November, sorry about that but I hope this makes up for it.

-

@midnight-blue-moon-princess @pipedream411 @frogofrg @loonagabs @ghostlythots @vixenshiftsvrs @devoetee @shorty-tolentino @aethelwyneleigh27 @ayesha-eroticax3 @emilia527 @danielle143 @maniacalbooper @awildewit @gifted-aurora @teenagellamaangel @julesjunimos @tacticalgirlboss @midnights-song @suzuki-18 @t3a-bag @latencygirl @krispymagazinepizza-blog @harperdoodle @odettecigno @sockertop @arrozyfrijoles23 @lovelystarfish @my-little-evil-blog @imastorytelleritsondvd @l1lpip @cringeycookies @identity2212 @balletbiscuit @mulletmcghee @maciswack @littleracco0n @oliver-1270 @weemansoap @cryingpages @connorsui @beebeechaos @gluttonybiscuits @strawberrygato @sozainturpal @echo9821 @blinca @illusionistlover @blubearxy @superficialfeelings @new-author3 @xanvasy @oniiloma @bankaixx @evie-199 @notsochillnerd @thatpersonnamedrook @hon3y-cloud @jaguarthecat @reinekoya @apixasflora @a-lovers-card @gloriousloveduck @aetherthetrashpanda @princess-vibes25 @vickykazuya @enfppuff @liliannamae @m0chac0ffee @flamehero-phoenix @bean-cream @realizemandi97 @almostdecadentstarfish @lunamoonbby

[456-is-the-way]

Hi! I love your fics so much! Gi-hun definitely needs more love, I mean come on, so here it is. Could you maybe write something about the reader being a foreigner and she was in the games when Gi-hun first was and they feel in love there and won together, so now they live in the Pink Motel together and make a plan about the games where Gi-hun returns to the games as a player and reader somehow infiltrates herself into the games by being the triangle guard and watches over them (kind of like what Hwang Jun-ho did) and during the player's rebellion she stays and he captures her along with the other triangle guy and then takes her mask off and Gi-hun realizes that it's her. They reunite really sweetly and she helps him to try and stops the games during the shootout. You could maybe even include the very ending where the Frotman kills Gi-hun's frined, like how would that scene in that case play out.

Thank you so much, love u 💚

FIRST OFF OMG WHAT IS WITH THIS FUCKING AMAZING PLOT IDEA. Seeing this I am going to be honest it's giving me an idea for a 5 part series. I dont want to stuff all this into a quick response a one shot wouldnt do it justice. If you wanna lokwey dm me I'll tag you in the comments , tell you when its done or just look on my page because this is a really good freaking plot idea !!! So imm be cooking this one I love Gi-hun. He is hot daddy. Ngl. 👀 but yeah I should be cooking up a start for this maybe around Friday it should be posted because this is behind 4+ other requests i have but I do want to give this spot light so yall keep looking at my posts !! Ahhh!!

[darksturnz]

DRAWINGS AND APOLOGIES

CONTENTS:・soft angst/fluff-heavy plot (??) ・star!reader ・mild language ・some fruity activity・artist!chris ・bambi!madison + more WC: 2.1K (not proof read)

play this song. on repeat !

The faint smell of nail polish filled Madison’s living room, the kind of chemical sweetness that mixed oddly well with the lavender candle flickering on the coffee table. Star sat cross-legged on the floor, her hoodie sleeves pushed up as she tried to carefully paint Madison’s nails a deep plum color. Comet, however, had other plans. The fluffy cat had sprawled across Madison’s lap, purring loud enough to rival the ambient playlist humming in the background.

“Hold still,” Star muttered, furrowing her brows as she hovered the brush over Madison’s thumb.

“I would if your son wasn’t crushing me,” Madison teased, scratching Comet’s chin.

Star rolled her eyes. “Don’t act like you don’t love the chunks”

Madison grinned, holding up her hand for inspection. “seriously, not to body shame but he’s huge now! He wasn’t this big in that picture you posted.”

Star snorted. “Yeah, he’s been eating like a starved Victorian child who just discovered McDonald’s for the first time.” She capped the polish and leaned back against the couch. “And he’s been rotting in bed with me all day. We’re both a little pathetic.”

The comment came out casually, but Madison’s eyes flicked up, watching Star closely. “Rotting, huh?” she asked, keeping her voice light. “Very Girl, Interrupted of you.”

Star snorted and shrugged, fiddling with the bottle of nail polish. “I’m very Winona Ryder, we know this already. Life’s just been… a lot, I guess.”

Madison shifted slightly, gently moving Comet off her lap and onto the couch beside her. “What’s been a lot?” she asked, dipping her fingers into the nail polish remover as if she wasn’t paying too much attention.

Star hesitated, the words stuck in her throat. But Madison’s quiet presence, her calm patience, made it easier to start. “My dad’s been…” She trailed off, her voice tightening. “He’s just been worse lately. Everything’s my fault, y’know? The house isn’t clean enough. I’m not enough. He just—” Her breath hitched, and she shook her head.

Madison didn’t interrupt, just nodded slightly, her hands folded in her lap.

“And Chris,” Star added, her voice quieter now. “He was such an asshole. Like, I get it—he’s stressed. He has so much going on. But it felt like everything he said was aimed right where it’d hurt the most, like he was just… unloading all his shit on me.”

Her fingers curled into the fabric of her hoodie, and her words spilled out faster now. “And the worst part is, I’m not even mad at him. I just—” She swallowed hard, her eyes shining. “I care about him so much, it makes me feel stupid. It’s like I can’t stop caring even when I know I should.”

Madison stayed quiet, her expression softening as she leaned closer.

“And I miss my mom.” Star’s voice cracked, and the first tear fell before she could stop it. “I miss her so much. I just… I wish things were different. I wish she was here.”

The tears came faster now, slipping silently down her cheeks. Comet, sensing her distress, immediately leapt down from the couch and climbed onto Star’s chest. He curled up there, his warm, heavy weight grounding her as he began purring softly.

Madison slid down to the floor beside Star, leaning against her. “Do you remember that time your mom took us to the pool?” she said, her voice soft and steady.

Star blinked, looking over at her.

“She jumped in fully clothed because you were too scared to go in,” Madison continued with a small smile. “And then she made a huge splash on purpose so we’d all get soaked. I thought the lifeguard was gonna kill her.”

A shaky laugh escaped Star’s lips. “I remember. She had to drive us home in her wet jeans.”

“And then there was the time she tried to help us bake cookies,” Madison added, her own laughter bubbling up. “But we didn’t read the directions, so we added like three tablespoons of salt instead of sugar. She ate one anyway and said it was the best cookie she’d ever had.”

Star laughed again, the sound soft and bittersweet. “She was such a liar.”

“She really was,” Madison agreed, nudging Star’s shoulder gently.

The laughter faded, but Star felt a little lighter. She wiped her face with her sleeve, looking over at Madison with a sad smile. “I think I might miss him,” she mumbled.

Madison shook her head, smiling knowingly. “Really? You’ve only been a little bit obvious with the whole Bella Swan vibe you’ve got going on.”

Star’s eyes widened, and then she burst into laughter, hitting Madison’s arm lightly. “Okay!”

“I’m just saying,” Madison teased.

“Well, now I need to binge Twilight,” Star said, still laughing.

Madison grinned. “Say no more.”

They quickly set up for a movie night, grabbing blankets, snacks, and, of course, Comet. Star curled up on the couch, a sense of ease washing over her for the first time in weeks.

Chris sat at the dinner table, staring down at his sketchpad. The drawing was finished, the lines crisp and deliberate, but he couldn’t bring himself to stop fidgeting with it. His pencil tapped against the table in a steady rhythm.

“Can you stop?” Lila mumbled from the couch, her eyes glued to the TV. “You’re bein’ annoying.”

Chris sighed softly, glancing over at her. “What’re y’watchin’, bug?”

“Snoopy in Space,” she said, barely looking at him.

Chris raised an eyebrow. “Isn’t Snoopy from, like, when Mom was a kid?”

Lila giggled. “Star said you’d be a hater about it. That’s why we only watch it together.”

Chris’s stomach dropped at the mention of Star. He hummed in response, his fingers tightening around the pencil.

“I miss Star,” Lila said quietly.

Chris looked over at her, struggling to find the words. “I know, bug,” he said finally, his voice soft. “S’bedtime though, c’mon.”

Lila pouted but didn’t argue when she caught the exhaustion in his eyes. She grabbed her bunny and walked over to him, wrapping her small arms around his neck. “Goodnight, Chris.” She kissed his cheek and padded off toward her room.

Chris blinked, stunned for a moment, before following her. He caught her just as she climbed into bed. “What was that about?” he asked.

“What?”

“You just tried to put yourself to bed. Since when’re y’too good for my tucking-in?”

Lila shrugged. “I didn’t wanna bother you.”

Chris’s chest ached, but he forced a smile. “Kid, you could never bother me. I’m tuckin’ you in ‘til you’re 50, alright?”

Lila rolled her eyes with a giggle as Chris flopped onto her bed, tickling her sides until she squealed.

When the giggles subsided, Chris looked at her seriously. “You know how much I love you?”

She nodded.

“You know how much Ma loves you?”

Another nod.

“Is Star mad at us ‘cause Momma’s not here?”

Chris’s heart clenched. He shook his head. “No, bug. She’s not mad at you or Momma. I was just an idiot and said some mean things I didn’t mean.”

Lila scowled. “What? Why! Go say sorry!”

Chris shrugged softly. “S’ not that simple.”

“Yes, it is!” Lila said, her small voice fierce. “You just say what you say to me—“I’m sorry let’s get feel better ice cream”— duh.”

Chris shook his head. “It unfortunately doesn’t work like that, kiddo.”

Lila yawned, snuggling deeper into her blanket. “You’re just bein’ a scaredy-cat.”

Chris kissed her forehead, tucking her in tightly. “ yeah, Goodnight, bug.”

Lila was sound asleep in her room, her bunny clutched tightly to her chest, the soft rise and fall of her breathing the only reminder that someone else was there. Chris sat at the dining table, staring down at the sketchpad in front of him.

The drawing was delicate but deliberate—a blend of shadow and light. The background was dark, with faint, swirling shapes blending into the shadows, but the stars stood out, scattered across the page in sharp, bright white. It wasn’t anything obvious, but it felt like it captured something he couldn’t put into words: the feeling of being adrift, of wanting to reach for something but not being sure if it was still there.

He’d started it thinking about Lila, about Evelyn, about how everything in his life felt like it was slipping out of his control. But somewhere in the hours he’d worked on it, his thoughts had drifted to Star. To the tears in her eyes, the way her voice had broken as she tried to reach him. To the silence that had stretched between them in the days since, heavier than he wanted to admit.

Chris folded the corner of the paper, unfolding it again, his jaw tight. He couldn’t shake the memory of her face—hurt, but not angry. Just sad. Like she was already bracing for him to walk away.

Finally, he stood up, grabbing his jacket and the drawing. He glanced into Lila’s room one more time, making sure she was still fast asleep, before slipping out of the trailer as quietly as he could.

Chris reached her trailer faster than he thought he would. It was cold, his breath visible in the night air, but he barely noticed. He stood at the door for a moment, staring at the chipped paint and the flickering porch light. His hand hovered over the door before he knocked, sharp and quick.

The sound echoed in the stillness, and for a second, he thought she might not be home. Then the door opened abruptly, but it wasn’t Star standing there. It was Danny, his expression hard and irritated.

“She ain’t here,” Danny said flatly, his words clipped. Before Chris could get a word in, the door slammed shut.

Chris stood there, frozen, his mind racing. He thought about leaving, about heading back to his own trailer and letting the silence win again. But instead, he pulled the drawing from under his jacket and reached into his pocket for a pen. The stars stared back at him as he scribbled on the back of the paper, the letters quick and messy but clear: Can we talk?

He folded the drawing carefully and walked to the side of the trailer where he knew her room was. The window was cracked open slightly, the tapestry hung over it swaying gently in the breeze. He slid the paper through the gap, hoping it would land somewhere visible, before stepping back. He stood there for a moment longer, his hands shoved deep into his jacket pockets, then turned and walked back toward his trailer.

Breaking Dawn: Part 1 played on the TV, the overly dramatic music swelling as Bella stared broodingly out the window. Madison couldn’t help but snort. “Okay, but who actually stares out the window like that?” she said, shaking her head.

Star, sprawled out on the couch with Comet curled up at her feet, grinned. “It’s iconic, Madison. Don’t question the art.”

Madison rolled her eyes, but her smile didn’t fade. She wasn’t really paying attention to the movie—not when Star looked so relaxed, her face lit up with laughter for the first time in weeks. Every time Star laughed, something warm bloomed in Madison’s chest, her heart beating just a little faster than usual.

She tried to focus on the TV, but her gaze kept drifting back to Star. The way her hair fell over her shoulder, the way her lips curved when she smiled, the way she absentmindedly scratched behind Comet’s ears. It wasn’t the first time Madison had noticed these things, but it was the first time she let herself admit what they meant.

Star shifted, leaning over to grab a handful of popcorn, and then settled back down, her head resting in Madison’s lap. Madison froze for a second, her breath catching, before she gently rested a hand on Star’s hair, letting her fingers trace soft patterns. Her heartbeat quickened, but she kept her movements steady, careful not to let Star notice.

The room felt warmer now, the flickering light from the TV casting soft shadows across Star’s face. Madison barely heard the dialogue on the screen, too focused on the way Star’s breathing slowed, her body relaxing completely.

For now, she didn’t say anything. She just brushed a strand of hair out of Star’s face and let her fingers linger there a moment too long, hoping Star couldn’t feel how her hands trembled ever so slightly. She studied the curve of her face, the way the faintest smile lingered on her lips even in the quiet. Madison felt a soft ache in her chest—not painful, but full, as if her heart had grown just a little too big for her ribs. The moment felt fragile, suspended between comfort and something else entirely, but Madison didn’t dare break it.

AUTHORS NOTE: TWILIGHT MENTION😸😸

TAG LIST: @jetaimevous @sturnsblunt @riasturns @ifwdominicfike @chrissturns-wife @mattsmunch @pip4444chris @ribread03 @ariestrxsh @angelic-sturniolos111 @pvssychicken @mattslolita @stvrnzcherries @dottieboo @lovergirl4gracieabrams @bluestriips @sturniolo-fann @chrisslut04 @owensbabygirl @sturnslutz @sturniqlo @st4rsturns

[please-destroy]

She's a Rainbow

Florence Pugh x Reader

Word Count: 3.1K

.

“I’m getting married.” Florence rushed the words like a confession as you answered the FaceTime.

You took a moment to process, staring at the live feed of her chin as she walked somewhere.

‘Like, in a movie?’ You checked, ignoring the way your heart was plummeting inexplicably. 

‘No.’ Florence told you succinctly. You tried to read her expression. She’d called you in a rush, you knew it wasn’t just for congratulations. You ignored the icy waves of sadness flooding you. The sudden certainty that you were losing your best friend.

You tried to recollect yourself. She needed you right now, even if she couldn’t say it.

‘Where are you going?’ You asked neutrally, not knowing what else to say.

‘Whole Foods.’ Florence answered immediately, blonde ponytail bouncing with each hurried footstep on the sidewalk. You wondered if she drawled the words on purpose, or if lockdown had given her the chance to develop an American accent.

Florence glanced down at your face on her screen. She pouted slightly.

“I need chia seeds.’ She told you seriously and you nodded with equal soberness.

‘Who are you going to marry?’ You asked.

Florence rolled her eyes. 

‘Who do you think?’ She answered sarcastically. There was too much bite in her words and you realised then what was wrong. Stress emanated from her.

‘That’s big.’ You commented, trying to keep your tone casual. Something in Florence’s shoulder’s loosened immediately. 

“It is, right?’ She agreed, chewing on her bottom lip as she crossed the street. 

‘You love him?’ You checked, trying to keep the question as light as you could. You didn’t want it to sound accusing. You never knew for sure if Florence could see your crush on her. Sometimes, you’d see a flicker of recognition in her eyes. You prayed it was your own secret. It was painful enough just for you.

Florence nodded quickly, almost imperceptibly. You watched her hook a mask from ear to ear. 

‘Can I call you back?’ She asked. ‘I feel like an asshole if I’m on the phone at the checkout.’

‘Sure.’ You replied quietly as the call disconnected.

You let your phone fall onto the bedspread, as you covered your face with your hands. 

A dry sob heaved through you suddenly. A tiny piece of hope that you’d had no right holding onto, was finally being killed off.

You took a steadying breath. You stared at the far side of your room. There was a polaroid picture of yourself and Florence perched on the shelf. It was from several years ago. 

You remembered the nervousness in her voice. Resolve filled you. Florence had a lot of friends, but you knew already that you were the first one she’d called. She needed you. You weren’t going to let her down.

Her face popped up on your screen as the call reengaged. You answered it immediately.

Florence was almost impossible to see, the high sun now directly behind her. She held up the bag of chia seeds with a victorious smile. You grinned back automatically. She was perfect. 

‘So-’ She began, the same nervous energy humming through the phone. 

‘Do you want me to come visit?’ You offered suddenly, cutting her off.

Florence’s breath caught. 

‘Yes.’ She told you immediately, her eyes crinkling with an emotional kind of happiness. ‘Yes. I really want that.’

You shared a small smile. Florence’s mask was hanging goofily from one ear.

Her voice was hesitant when she next spoke.

‘It’s not that I’m not happy.’ She told you quietly. ‘It’s just a lot.’

You nodded like you understood.

‘I’ll be there.’ You promised. ‘We’ll figure it out together.’

Florence’s smile was your favourite one.

‘Missed you.’ She added.

‘Missed you too.’ You agreed easily.

After the call disconnected, you packed your bags. Your job had been furloughed and visiting Florence was something you’d been hoping to do for a while.

Ironically, you’d been trying to give her and her boyfriend some space.

After getting tested, you drove over the next day. You texted Florence when you set off.

You pulled into her driveway and found her sitting expectantly on her own doorstep. 

Before you were even fully out of the car, Florence had engulfed you in an excited hug.

‘I hope you don’t greet everyone like this.’ You murmured sarcastically. Florence hit your arm in faux rebuff as she stepped back.

When she looked at you, her eyes were shining with tears.

‘Oh, Flo.’ You murmured, realising that she was crying. Florence didn’t speak again, wrapping her arms firmly around you, her head burying against your shoulder.

‘Missed you.’ She mumbled again. You didn’t answer, only tightening your own hold of her. 

Florence led you into her house. You looked around curiously, this wasn’t somewhere you’d been to before.

There was something wild about the decorating style and it felt familiar to you. You smiled at some of the pictures that caught your eye. 

Florence saw where you were looking and grinned too. 

‘We look so little.’ She determined, hand moving familiarly around your waist. It stung to have her so intimate but you loved that she was comfortable around you.

‘That photo is from last year.’ You answered with a roll of your eyes. 

Florence raised her eyebrows dramatically as she moved past you, throwing herself happily onto the couch.

‘We were so young back then.’ She confirmed with a grin, looking back at you. You didn’t disagree, sitting down next to her.

‘Is it just us?’ You asked unsurely. You felt the impending conversation and knew it was better to be done privately. 

‘Yep.’ Florence popped the ‘p’ sound with false calm. ‘He’s at our other apartment. He thought we’d want some space.’

You nodded again, Florence had once told you he was a bit shy. Still, you realised that at this rate you might not actually meet him until the wedding.

‘How are you?’ You asked directly instead. The question had been burning since the moment you’d arrived.

Florence hesitated beside you. You let your hand rest on top of hers and she exhaled slowly.

‘I’m okay.’ She answered succinctly.

‘Surprised, shocked, scared?’ You offered carefully.

‘Shocked, maybe a bit scared.’ She admitted readily, seeming reassured that you were on the same wavelength. ‘I love him. But, I never thought I’d be married anytime soon.’

You threaded your fingers with hers and squeezed.

Florence’s head rested on your shoulder. 

‘Fuck.’ She murmured to herself.

‘Did you tell him that?’ You asked quietly. 

‘No.’ Florence answered barely above a whisper. ‘I know how much he wants this.’ 

You swallowed the lump in your throat. You loved her too much to speak and you hated the lingering fear in her voice

‘I want you to be happy.’ You told her. ‘Whatever that means, I’ll be by your side.’

You felt the warmth of her tears against your shoulder.

‘What if I don’t know what that means.’ She whispered, voice cracking. 

‘Well.’ You paused. ‘I’m still not going anywhere.’

.

There was something subdued about the rest of the weekend that you spent with Florence. In many ways, it felt like you were helping her through a break up. She seemed conflicted and strangely worried. 

She brightened when you asked for stories about their time together as a couple. She told you about trips they’d taken together and how much he made her laugh. You felt like your heart was cracking open, but you kept the same encouraging smile on your face.

It was on the Monday morning, as you sat together eating a cranberry-chia seed scone, that you asked your next big question.

‘Did you talk about dates?’ You asked.

Florence looked confused.

‘For the wedding.’ You clarified, smiling at her puzzled expression.

‘Oh, right.’ She nodded. ‘In two weeks.’ She answered casually, taking another bite of her scone.

You nearly fell out of your chair.

You swore loudly and Florence’s head bobbed as if she’d been expecting your reaction.

‘It’s going to be tiny.’ She informed you. ‘Just the officiant, us, his friend and you.’ 

She added your name with a playfully hopeful smile, telling you just how much she wanted you there.

‘Oh my god.’ You answered, trying to wrap your mind around how soon this would be happening.

‘Our friend’s house has a private beach.’ She continued casually, as if her friend wasn’t certainly a multi-millionaire. ‘We’re going to have the ceremony there.’

‘Outfits.’ You stumbled out stupidly. 

Florence shook her head. ‘I’m just wearing my favourite sundress.’ She informed you readily. ‘Dress casual.’

It occurred to you that Florence was a consistently decisive person, with everything except accepting his proposal.

‘You’re going to look stunning.’ You determined with a bright smile, trying to move past your own shock.

Florence glanced shyly down at the kitchen table. ‘I hope so.’ She mumbled.

‘No bachelorette party then.’ You predicted, pretending to look very sad.

Florence hesitated and you prepared yourself for another plan to be revealed.

“Well.’ She started. ‘I was kind of thinking maybe I could come and stay with you for a few days.’

Your head tilted in confusion.

‘Of course.’ You agreed. ‘But, I don’t think that’s much of a party.’

‘I know.’ Florence elongated the words. ‘But, I don’t want a party.’ She shrugged and you caught her gaze flitting over to the photo of you both smiling, that was stuck to her fridge.

She turned back to you and smiled.

‘I just want to spend some time with you.’ She continued with a sheepish shrug.

Your heart twisted and you weren’t even sure if it was pain or love. Being part of Florence’s life had always been enough. You didn’t want to acknowledge this feeling of impending loss.

‘Drinks, snacks and movies?’ You forced yourself to suggest casually. Florence’s face lit up with private delight.

‘It’s going to be the best.’ She decided, moving forward to kiss your cheek.

Driving home that afternoon, you felt like your chest was heavy and hollow at the same time.

Florence’s parting wave was stuck in your mind. 

You turned up the stereo in your car and tried not to let the reality sink in.

.

When Florence arrived, the morning before her wedding, she was bubbly in a way that you hadn’t expected.

She’d hardly texted for the last week and a half. You’d been cautious to push her, not sure if it was wedding or work pressures.

Florence entered your house with all the familiarity of someone who lived there. It wasn’t surprising, a few years ago she practically had.

She’d walked in with a surprisingly large bag. You realised immediately that it was almost entirely filled with an assortment of supplies. She lined up bottles of wine on the coffee table in front of her, before pulling out a stack of DVDs from her collection.

‘That bag is straight from Mary Poppins.’ You accused teasingly. Florence glanced up and grinned.

‘I’ve been so excited for this.’ She admitted easily, eyes sparkling slightly. ‘I kept repacking.’

You kept your smile steady as you processed your worry. Florence only over prepared when she was nervous. 

‘How’s your week been?’ You asked casually as you brought over two wine glasses. 

Florence groaned loudly and her feet kicked up on the edge of the coffee table. Her head rested back against the sofa dramatically.

You glanced at her unsure if you should be genuinely concerned. 

‘That bad?’ You asked, keeping your voice neutral as you poured the wine.

‘He keeps making plans.’ Florence admitted quietly. Her voice sank the atmosphere like a weighted balloon. She couldn’t hide the fear in it.

‘I’m barely ready for this.’ She continued, her eyes locking with yours. ‘And he’s talking about the future.’

‘Kids?’ You gambled and Florence nodded. 

‘And “planning our careers together”.’ She added with air quotations for his suggestion.

‘That’s a lot.’ You agreed, passing her the glass. Florence looked at her drink for a moment, you knew she was going to down it a half second before she did.

She handed you back the empty glass with an unashamed grin. 

‘Fine.’ You allowed, feeling nostalgic for the slightly wilder Florence of a few years ago. ‘But, you’re not going to your wedding still drunk for the night before.’

Florence rolled her eyes. Still, she sipped more slowly from the refilled glass. Raising her eyebrows in acknowledgement of your request. 

Without even needing to check, you took the Titanic DVD out of its case and set it up on your television.

When you sat back down, Florence snuggled immediately closer. Your hand stretched automatically across her shoulders and you gave her a reassuring squeeze. 

Florence offered you a malteser. When you went to take it, she popped it into her own mouth and grinned cheekily.

You rolled your eyes and grabbed another. You could feel her silent chuckle next to you.

‘You’re the worst.’ You complained huffily, meaning the opposite. Florence didn’t stop laughing.

By the time the movie had ended, Florence was sufficiently wine drunk.

As the movie played out, she’d slowly shifted from laughing to a much more somber kind of inebriated.

She lifted her head from your shoulder as she got up clumsily to switch the DVDs.

‘Jesus.’ You muttered as Marley and Me started to play. You glanced at Florence as she settled back beside you.

‘You okay?’ You worried gently. Florence didn’t answer, adjusting to lie down on your sofa, head in your lap.

You understood the silent request for comfort. You combed your fingers through her hair absentmindedly as she focused quietly on the movie.

You wondered if she’d been looking for an excuse to cry. You ached with the thought of Florence being in that kind of pain.

You realised how unsure the future seemed, you just couldn’t imagine her saying lifelong vows tomorrow. 

Florence began to snuffle as she started to cry at the movie.

As the saddest scenes played, her cries were uncontrolled and gasping. 

‘Flo.’ You murmured, trying to bring her back into the room.

She turned in your lap, looking up at you with reddened eyes.

‘Come on.’ You murmured, encouraging her to sit up so that you could wrap her in a comforting hug.

Florence didn’t stop crying for a long time. Eventually, as the tears turned to hiccups, you led her gently back to your bedroom.

There wasn’t a question about her sleeping in the spare room.

She took off her pants and curled next to you in just her t-shirt and underwear. Her chest still moved rapidly with the after effects of her uncontrolled crying.

Her fingers curled tightly at the hem of your own t-shirt. You kissed her hair soothingly.

‘You’ll feel better tomorrow.’ You promised, not knowing if it would be true.

Florence’s breaths came more evenly and, sooner than you expected, you knew she’d fallen asleep. You stared up at the ceiling for a long while, trying to piece everything together.

.

The next morning went better than expected. Florence made it through several glasses of water and managed to reduce any hangover to just a headache. You were planning to leave at 2pm and had the address already plugged into your GPS.

You checked in with Florence regularly, gaining a thumbs up each time.

You felt an overwhelming rush of attraction when you saw her in the rainbow sundress that made her impossibly brighter.

Florence blushed at your reaction, and you saw her pleased smile.

‘Excited?’ You asked, regretting your question when a wave of tension immediately straightened her spine.

‘Nervous.’ She breathed, smoothing the dress unnecessarily. You both checked the time. 

You needed to leave now. Florence blinked away a brief look of panic before following you to the car.

Another benefit to such a low key wedding was the lack of press awareness. Your nondescript car would attract no attention today.

You let quiet music play on the stereo and Florence breathed steadily in the passenger’s seat, her eyes closed.

She exuded nerves and you glanced at her worriedly as you followed the directions to the house with the private beach.

When you pulled up in the driveway of a very expensive looking mansion. Florence’s eyes opened and her attention focused entirely on you. It was like your presence was the only thing keeping her breathing.

‘You ready?’ You asked quietly. You still had ten minutes until you were expected.

There was a half second, a hesitation where you knew that Florence was going to lie. 

She blinked slowly, her focus never leaving you.

‘What if the thing that makes me happy, doesn’t make you happy?’ She asked suddenly, voice abrupt.

You startled at the unexpected turn of the conversation.

‘You have to do it anyway.’ You answered with certainty. 

Florence took a deep breath.

‘I’m in love with you.’ She told you straightforwardly and your heart stuttered. ‘I know you might not feel the same. But I can’t go in there and not say this first.’

Your mouth dropped, time shuddered to a stand still.

Florence covered her face with her hands briefly, breaking her eye contact.

‘I’m sorry.’ She whispered, but there was a quiet resolve underlying her apology. ‘I had to tell you.’

Silence lingered between you as your brain tried to process the impossible.

‘Don’t apologise.’ You told her at last, voice hoarse. Florence was perfect. This had to be a dream. 

‘I’ve been in love with you for years.’ You admitted freely, tears beginning to run down your cheeks.

A bright smile cracked over Florence’s face like a sunrise in the morning.

‘Wow.’ She murmured. ‘We should have talked about this sooner.’ 

You laughed unexpectedly in agreement. 

Suddenly, Florence’s eyes widened.

‘I have to call off a wedding.’ She realised calmly, and you revelled in the easy determination that she approached even the most daunting task. 

She cracked the car door and you moved to do the same.

‘Wait here?’ She asked you, hand reaching out to stop you leaving the car too.

‘I need a getaway driver.’ She told you with a small smile.

You nodded, feeling high on relief and joy at the same time.

Florence walked into the mansion with her head held high.

Ten minutes later, she exited the same door. 

Her head was still high, but there were tears tracks on her cheeks.

She reentered the car just as you started the engine.

You backed out of the driveway, as Florence covered her face with her hands again.

You glanced over to her as soon as you were back on the road to your house.

Florence looked over at you and, despite the tear tracks, you saw your favourite smile of hers stretching across her face.

‘I can’t help feeling so happy.’ She told you, a little dazedly. 

You smiled so hard you thought your heart might burst.

[ladyandherbooks]

I loved Callum and. Runaan's interactions this season. While I do agree it would have been great to see some of Callum's negative feelings towards Runaan I think that they really only had time to focus on one siblings anger towards him so I'm okay with them not focusing on it. Callum has also had time to work through his feelings towards Runaan during his and Rayla's quest to free him.

I do think that the other reason as to why they got on well this season is that Runaan has complete faith and trust in Rayla's choice of romantic partners and friends. And when this boyfriend not only helps to free you but also puts your daughter first, then Runaan wouldn't be able to dislike him.

Look at his smile when Callum chooses Rayla in 7x02:

He already likes Callum because he's putting Rayla first and making her happy.

And the worst that their reactions get is Runaan getting annoyed at Callum for using the same compliment as small talk for the 15th time in two weeks, which to be completely fair is very understandable.

But Callum quickly rectifies this by freeing Ethari from his Moon Cub duties that day, thus ensuring that he could spend the day with his husband. But he does give Callum the biggest eye raise at Callum's enthusiasm at volunteering to watch the Moonshadow elf kids because he knows Callum is way over his head and is giving his enthusiasm the reaction it deserves

And then the deadpan stare after the 10 babies comment

It really was a harmless clash in personalities where a grumpy, serious broody elf had to interact with his daughters goofy, nerdy, loving and sometimes awkward human boyfriend who is also staying with them for 2 weeks straight. A boyfriend who is also trying his hardest to make a good impression but is not always succeeding but you like him anyway because he has a good heart and loves your daughter more than anything in the world.

And the pair of you manage to bond and come to trust each other enough to go on a mission together where you not only protect one another but he also trusts you enough to ask you to kill him in order to save the world.

I think that this moment where Runaan came to love Callum as he was not only willing to sacrifice his life to save everyone in Xadia but also wanted to protect Rayla specifically from a promise that would cause her a great deal of pain and grief.

I am excited and curious to see how their relationship and interactions evolve and develop as, like some fellow fans have already discussed, Callum wants to be a part of this family and misses, wants and needs fatherly relationship, one of which Runaan and Ethari will be happy to provide, especially since Callum will be spending alot of time in the Silvergrove in the next 7 years. They're going to love each other so much and have each other's back but Runaan will still be giving his dorky son in law a raised eyebrow whenever he says or does something ridiculous or dorky.

[the-sinful-voice-witch]

Here's my SONIC 3 input:

Ehem, first: KYAAAAAAAAA SHADOW AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA MARIA KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA POST CREDIT SCENE KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

And now... To hell with the theories I wrote years ago after the second movie because I didn't write a single thing right 😂😂😂, well no... I got one wish coming true at least, Keanu reeves as Shadow 😍😍😍 .

Now I'm going to comment about how the thing with Shadow and Maria was handled and I'm going to theorize a bit again about the next movie... See if this time I get something right🥲🥲🥲 well anyway the old posts are still in my profile if anyone wants to read an alternative storyline and now... Spoilers under the cut:

I should be mad given how adamant I was about this but I'm not because thankfully everything made sense and it was well written though I can't help to feel a bit disappointed... I'm a shadamy fan what did you expect 😂😂😂? But no shadamy for us because it wasn't Amy the one who changed Shadow's mind but fortunately unlike that disgraceful time in Sonic X this time there was no tag along human involved, it was Sonic himself who did it and in this context it was perfect. You see the movie version of Maria wasn't even a sick girl, she was a healthy cheerful kid that... To me had a personality that felt like a combination of Sonic's (movie version) and Amy Rose's (current Amy in general because we don't know yet about her movie version) personalities like for real all the silly things she does is something Sonic or Amy would do, is like if Sonic and Amy had a kid she would have this version of Maria's personality 🥰🥰 and girl... Unlike the original, Maria doesn't even get to say any last words to Shadow before dying because this time the shooting instead caused an explosion that killed her instantly 😭😭😭 somehow that made it even worse! And she wasn't sick! She had all live ahead of her and G.U.N motherfuckers took it away! SHE PLAYED THE GUITAR 😭 Shadow remember her playing! This was a massive heartbreak...💔💔💔💔

Anyway... Shadow hurts Tom thinking it was another specific person (also feel bad about him, he actually tried to stop the idiot from shooting and considered Shadow a kid like Maria), that triggered Sonic into wanting revenge and somehow Shadow in a way feels validation on his vengeful feelings and accepts his fate wanting Sonic to finish him but Sonic obviously won't give him that satisfaction and instead teaches him about focusing and validating healthier feelings: Even though Maria and Longclaw aren't here anymore the love we had still remains and Shadow then remembered the conversation he had we Maria watching the Stars, even though the star is gone it's light remains and that's how he changed his mind so yeah no Amy no Shadamy but how can I be mad at this?🥹🥹🥹🥹 It was perfect. So even though there's no Shadamy... at that doesn't mean there's no Amy because.... THIS HAPPENED IN THE THE POST CREDIT SCENE: 👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇

OMG I CAN'T BREATHE! THAT ENTRANCE!!! YESSSSS MY GIRL AMY ROSE IS OFFICIALLY PART OF THE MOVIES KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SHE IS SO CUTE SO CUTE🥹🫠🫠❤️ I LOVE HER!!! I HATE WE CAN'T SEE HER FULL OUTFIT😖😖😖😖

Finally finally FINALLY ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥, well she finally here so is time tooooooooo THEORIZE!!!😂😂😂, she if I get something right this time:

Well first Amy wasn't the only one showing up in that scene... We also have the introduction of Metal Sonic and that means everything makes sense and is connected my guess is that next movie could be a mix between the Sonic game in which Amy and Metal Sonic were introduced and the game Sonic heroes.

So, in the games Amy and Metal Sonic were introduced together and Amy was waiting in a specific place because the tarot cards told her and then se meets Sonic and metal Sonic, last one kidnappes her, Sonic saves her and then she falls in love with him and in the Sonic heroes game Metal Sonic shows up again and Sonic team along other characters team has to defeat it, then what exactly happened in the post credit scene? Multiple Metal Sonics attack him and he is struggling because he is outnumbered and then Amy Rose steps up and using her hammer as a boomerang saves him.

We have some changes, obviously Amy has her movie version of her current games version and not the look she had when she was introduced in the games though they might show us that look in a flashback or an eater egg, then this time instead of facing one metal Sonic we have a group of them and instead of Sonic rescuing Amy it's her who helps him being already a fighter, I'm going to assume she knew where to go thanks to her tarot cards like in the game what I don't know is if she is simply there because the cards guided her and after seeing what was happening she wants to help or if she has an specific mission. Another guess is that she is not going to fall in love immediately, I think Sonic will be the first one crushing for the sheer factor of Amy being the second Hedgehog he ever met but the first female hedgehog and she probably has seen other hedgehogs before 😂😂😂 so with the personality he has in the movies I think he will be: "I wanna look cool to her but I'm being a clumsy fool, earth swallow me please" 🫠🫠🫠like... Movie Sonic is a freaking teenager actually acting like a teenager, Amy will like him too but she won't be as obvious as she used to be and she won't be that clumsy because she looks like she's probably used to interact with other alien furros.

As for Metal Sonic, seeing his robotics clones is like he is taking Shadow's place in Sonic heroes who is you don't remember had multiple robotic clones of him, probably none of those clones were the original Metal Sonic also his existence makes an excuse for Omega to exist and wanting to eradicate all eggmans robots as revenge for setting him aside when obviously he is the superior robot 😂, we love you Omega 🥰🥰 also at the end of the movie we know that Shadow is alive as you remember he was still super Shadow and was hit by the explosion in the space and that must have knocked out all the chaos emeralds and spilled them around the universe and that will be the reason for ROUGE my dear waifu to appear! She probably found one and as the treasure hunter she is she will want to gather all of them as a result we have all the pieces we need for TEAM DARK! I don't think we're going to have team rose, we'll have to accept Team Sonic and Team dark, I think that's enough for a good Sonic heroes references along metal Sonic who obviously will be the final boss becoming a giant robomonster at the end.

I'll add an extra, I expect Knuckles to tease the hell out of Sonic because of his crush on Amy only to get the tables turned on him when they meet... The sexy bat thief ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 and Tails complaining that they're gross 😂😂😂 and obviously I want Amy to show interest In Shadow and I want Sonic jealous... I'm not asking too much 🤡🤡🤡

End of theories, hope you like them, see you in another post 🤪🤪😂😂

[theweirderstuffblogdontlook]

early draft Bob Velseb Fanfic

(im still working on a small comic to accompany this fic before i release it officially, but i would appreciate the feedback, so dont hesitate to comment as it encourages me to make more art for the au. This comic takes place after the events of this post.) For reference, the woman in this image next to bob is Mary-Anne

then in this image, from left to right (no including Bob in the middle) we have Roxy, Greta, Sparrow, Ash, Trixie, Jane (who's the bar's manager and doesn't appear in the fic), and Billie (who is the bar's bouncer)

Fic is below the readmore. And I kinda recommend looking back at the images every so often to keep track of who's who, cus there's a lot of lesbians hanging out chatting in this fic.

Hanging out in the mismatched collection of old sofas in the lounge area of the local lesbian bar, some of the bar’s regulars were having a casual chat. When another of the regulars, a woman named Mary-Anne, excitedly came up to the group with a laptop in hand. Mary: “Hey you girls wanna see my latest true crime theory?! I think I've got a really good one this time!” Sparrow: “YEEEEAAAAHhhhhhh! Lemme see it! Show us what detective work ya been up to!” Trixie: “Did you finally see if I’ve done any murders I didn't know about? You said you’d check.” Mary: “Yeah I know, and I'll get to it eventually, but I found something way more interesting…… Barbra.” Sparrow: “Barbra?” Mary: “Yeah!” She sets up the laptop on the table, the women all crowding around to get a look, as Mary-Anne puts on a dramatic, though still a bit joking, tone and pose.

Mary: “Barbra, could secretly be, the notorious serial killer…. Bob Velseb.”

Ash: “Who?” Sparrow: “No fucking way! The Halloween cannibal from that other town down south? How’ed you make that connection?”

Roxy: “Excuse me, Cannibal?!”

Ash: “That’s pretty metal actually. Wish looking into me found connections to crimes that sick.” Greta: “Ummm, isn’t that man dead?”

Sparrow: “Wait yeah good point. The news said he got caught and killed by police last Halloween night. Shouldn't that be like, disqualifying for what hypothetical crimes you think your friends might have committed?”

Mary: “Wellllll…. yeah, supposedly he even had an autopsy and everything. But It fits too well if you just ignore the whole being dead thing!”

Roxy: “Hey! Don't you buncha freaks go just comparing Barbra to people like that. She hasn't even been around that long. Don't need you scaring her off with your true crime detective mess when I know you didn't even ask if she was okay with it first!”

Mary: “But it's suuuuuuuch a good one though!”

Trixie: “Yeah lighten up, I doubt she's gonna mind. I mean it's not like Barbara is actually gonna be a DEAD criminal. And especially with those morbid jokes she likes, she'll probably think it's hilarious.”

Roxy: “Nuh-Uh! I don't care how funny it is. She's still doing this without asking! It's one thing for her to look into yalls lives like a creepy stalker when you ask her to. But don't you go encouraging her with that spying into people's business shit without permission!”

Mary: “Aww come on.”

Ash: “Okay, I'm actually gonna agree with Roxy here. I mean what if one day, I really have to murder someone? I don't need Sherlock Holmes getting on my trail ten minutes later. You could at least ask first.”

Sparrow: “Come on, that's different! I'm sure you'd have a good reason if you did ever murder someone. And she'd be more likely to help you bury the body than turn you in. We all would.”

Roxy: “Nuh-uh, I still don't like this biz. Plus, isn't Barbra a trans woman? You'd probably end up hurting her feelings more by comparing her to a dead MAN than to the whole criminal thing.”

Sparrow: “Wait, since when was Barbra trans?”

Ash: “She was kinda making it obvious with that wig she always wears.”

Sparrow: “Wait really? I thought she was wearing the wig because she had some grizzly scar or something on her head from the car crash and didn't want to call attention to it. I mean they did say she had a bad head injury. Like it's why they said she's always wearing the sunglasses even when inside. The concussion like, messed up her ability to look directly at bright lights or something.”

Ash: “...Yeah okay that's a fair point I didn't need to immediately jump to her wearing the wig being to make her pass better. But like, there's still a lot of stuff besides that. Plus Caprica admitted to it. Barbra definitely used to be a dude.”

Greta: “Doesn't really matter if she's trans regardless, since she only ever really flirts with Caprica.”

Trixie: “I'd fuck her even with a dick like are you fucking kidding me? She's hot as hell.”

Sparrow: “Oh my god same! I swear Barbra is wasted on that woman.”

Roxy: “Yeah, but like, I ain't gonna pretend I wouldn't get a massive crush too if some lady pulled my fat ass out of a burning car wreck and lemme stay at her place while I recover like Caprica did. That's like some fairytale relationship shit.”

Trixie: “Exactly! if I got my life saved all dramatically by someone who's not just gay, but gay AND single ANNND they let you stay at their house for free? I wouldn't even care if they were hot or not. You'd have to be a real big piece of shit to be getting rid of me anytime soon. I'd be grabbing on with both hands. Maybe not as hard as Barbra seems to be, but still.”

Greta: “Umm, I meant more that she's not pressuring anybody, so it wouldn't matter either way what she has.”

Mary: “We're getting off topic! I wanna talk about my cool theory!”

Ash: “Right, right, let's hear it.”

Roxy: “Let's NOT hear it! She didn't ask Barbra for permission!”

Sparrow: “Well since she's already put it together, the least we could do is go over it and let her know if it'd be a mistake to tell Barbra and hurt her feelings. Like if it is something really insulting, it would be better to act like it never happened right?”

Roxy folds her arms and grumbled, but otherwise stops complaining. Letting Mary-Anne get on with it.

Tapping on her laptop for a second before turning it around to show a PowerPoint style compilation of research and pictures, starting with Bob's prison mugshot, which the ladies leaned in to see.

Mary: “So here's what I found. So we've got this Bob Velseb guy right? Notorious cannibal serial killer, captured on Halloween night a few years ago and put in prison.”

Billie: “....Did you really make a whole presentation for this?”

Mary: “I told you, it's a really good one! And I had to keep my evidence somewhere anyway. So it's like a digital scrapbook, and I just cleaned it up some to show you.”

Trixie, with a bit of a teasing tone: “Becha wish you could make a whole corkboard setup with red yarn instead.”

Mary: “I sooooooo would, but it’s just too hard to fit that sort of thing in my car and drive it around. You all gotta come meet at my house so I can have the excuse to set up a real one!” Billie: “....Amateur detective potluck.” Mary: “Omg yes. With like a bunch of detective based desserts! Sparrow: Chalk outline chocolate cookies!

Ash: “Halloween coleslaw.” Roxy, through half muffled snickering: “Girl, the fuck is halloween coleslaw??” Mary: “We’re getting off track! Back to what I was saying…”

She switches to the next slides showing clips from newspapers and the like.

Mary: “So he stays in prison for awhile. But then last year, he escapes from prison with a few other small time criminals.

And he spends a few months killing people, like 8 or 9 bodies being found, all with the same M - O. Until Halloween night comes around again. He goes after the same family he got caught while trying to kill that other Halloween. And it leads to an encounter with the police who kill him in a shootout. Where he's brought to the morgue for an autopsy and has the cause of death confirmed…..

BUT!!!”

She changes to the next slide, which was talking about a car crash, a man found dead, and had a map with some areas marked in mspaint.

Mary: “The next day after the news report of Mr. Velseb’s death goes out, we have this weird little event happen. So there’s this man, who was supposedly on his way to a hunting trip? He's found stabbed to death on the side of the road here.”

She zooms in on the map, showing the road between this town and the weird little town where Bob comes from, and points to the marked location just past the outskirts of Bob's town.

Mary: “Now wild animals had gotten to the corpse before it was found, so it was pretty mangled, but he had definitely been stabbed. Which is a bit of evidence that could link to the knife wielding serial killer. Bob Velseb, also known as the devil butcher, so named because he used to be a butcher and ended up feeding his victims to his patrons.”

Roxy: “Oh, no, ew why'd you have to go and tell me that?”

Mary: “Well I had to give you the context that this is a guy who stabs people, so we should be looking for stuff like this where the victim was stabbed.”

Roxy: “You could've just said he stabs people!”

Mary: “Well, he also tends to butcher and eat people so we gotta keep an eye out for…”

Billie, in her slightly monotone, but firm voice: “Maybe cool it with the gruesome details.” 

Mary: “Alright alright. It's not super relevant right now anyway, since it looks to me like the guy was in too much of a rush anyway to actually butcher anyone. Because the interesting thing for us…. is this man's truck.”

She points to a location further down the road, on the outskirts of their own town/small city and close to one of the parks.

Mary: “His truck… was found here. Crashed into a ditch, blood all over the inside of it, but no body. So if it had been a regular crash, then the hunter's body should have been right here with his car, not all the way back here covered in stab wounds. So according to the evidence, he was stabbed to death here, had his car stolen by someone who looked to be pretty injured themselves, which was then driven all the way here… to our town.”

Roxy: “Guuuurl…. Shut the hell up! That is sinister as fuck! You're telling me we've got somethin coming up from that creepy ass missing kids town, to over where we live? Man I don't even care if it happened the day after some big time serial killer died. That should still be a big ass problem!”

Mary: “Don't worry, it gets even better!”

Billie: “I think you mean worse.” 

Mary: “Yeah! It gets even worse! So in the days after this body was found up until now, the number of murders went way up for about a month or so. With the bodies matching Bob Velsebs usual modus operandi. Showing up stabbed and mangled with pieces missing. With even a few cops getting killed in that time! 

And then after that, even though there weren't any more bodies being found, the number of missing persons still stayed higher. Almost like a murderer who used to work out in the open….  was now covering his tracks.”

Trixie: “That's spooky as hell! Why's this the first time I'm hearing about somebody out there killing people??”

Billie gave a bit of a knowing look as she explained: “Because what we're listening to is a conspiracy. She's not seeing the evidence and working from it, she's made a theory first and is putting together all the information that supports the theory. That's how these true crime conspiracies work. It's good for a spooky campfire story, but there's a reason why the actual detectives aren't saying the same thing and telling the local news to spread the word.”

Roxy: “Man, you're just gonna be working me up over nothing then.”

Mary: “Not REALLY nothing, this stuff has actually happened.”

She then pitches her voice low and spooky for emphasis.

Mary: “And who knows, maybe there really was a cover up with the serial killer not actually being killed.”

Sparrow: “Yeah! Don't be a spoilsport! So like, so…. Like… uhhh… so how does this stuff have anything to do with Barbra though? Like you're saying the death of this Bob guy was a cover up, but how does this connect to Barbra?”

Mary: “Well first up, their descriptions are very similar. Barbra has the right height and build for…”

Billie: “How tall did they say this Velseb guy was?”

Mary: “Uhhh….”

She flipped through the presentation back to the mugshot 

“6 foot 4.”

Billie: “Yeah, that's about right for Barbra.”

Showing her experience as a bouncer with being able to judge people's height from comparing them to their ID's.

Mary: “Right! Hair color, skin, build, even the accents match too.”

Sparrow: “Cool! That's already way better than when you tried to link me to any murders!”

Mary: “I know right!”

Greta: “Still, that's just looking like a dead serial killer. If you're only going based off of just happening to know someone who matches the description, that could still lead to hurt feelings.”

Mary: “But that's the thing, it's not only looking the same. Like for instance, think about how Barbara and Caprica said they met.”

Billie: “.... A car accident.”

Mary: “Right! And what started off this whole uptick in violent crime? This guy getting killed, getting his truck stolen, then whoever stole it crashing the truck into a ditch on the outskirts of the town.”

Trixie: “That's not the same type of accident they described in how they met though.”

Mary: “Yeah, but any good cover story has an element of truth in it.”

Ash: “So you're basically saying, that Caprica pulled somebody out of a wreck, who turned out to be a cannibal serial killer that the cops covered up the death of. And who instead of cannibal serial killing her, fell head over heels in love, and now…. what, they're like a serial killer power couple or something? So is Caprica secretly a serial killer now too?”

Mary: “Weeeeeeeelllllllll…. Kinda? Yeah? I mean, turns out, Capricas actually kinda legit been through some horrible stuff in real life. Buuuuut I'm not so sure about talking about that stuff since it, you know, actually 100% happened to her.”

Trixie: “Shit, so you're saying she actually has some kind of excuse for how trying to make smalltalk with her, makes her look like she's offended you even thought to try and speak to her?

It's not like… you know. Because of some guy…. Right?”

Mary: “No, no, nothing like that.”

Greta: “Well… you might as well tell us since we've come this far.”

Mary: “....Okay. Just a sec.”

She goes to the laptop, clicks open a web browser, and takes a moment to look up the right event.

Mary: “Okay, so over a decade ago, there was this thing that happened at a campsite near here, where this big elk supposedly ate something bad, like old rat poison from the 70s or something, which made it freak out and go on a violent rampage where it gored a bunch of campers to death.”

She steps back to show an old newspaper clipping with a picture of Caprica and a bunch of young scouts.

Mary: “Caprica was one of the few survivors, who also saved a bunch of cub scouts by having them climb a tree where the elk couldn't reach them.”

Sparrow: “Hold on, I actually recognize this one! That's the state record for the single most people killed in a single day due to an animal attack! So Caprica was one of the people involved in it the whole time? That's wild!”

Ash: “From hero to serial killer….. That's pretty brutal of her…. Nice.”

Sparrow: “Of course the lady who still dresses goth every day even though she's pushing 40 would have that be the takeaway here.”

Ash: “I know what I'm about.”

Trixie: “That still seems like a bit of a reach though.”

Billie: “I’ll reiterate. This is a conspiracy theory being made up for fun. It's going to be full of reaches.”

Trixie: “No I mean, Barbra is absolutely crazy for that girl. Like remember that one time? (comic about bob drowning his sorrows in liquor because caprica had to go to a doctors appointment and he couldn't come along.) Trixie: “It just seems disproportionate to fall that hard after a life of murder and cannibalism, to Caprica of all people.”

Sparrow: “You literally just said a few minutes ago if you were in Barbara's position getting your life saved, they wouldn't be able to get rid of you if they tried.”

Trixie: “What, am I suddenly not allowed to embellish a little? But I mean, come on, haven't you seen the two of them enough? Heck, starting out I was more worried that Caprica was like… like she didn't even want to be in a relationship?”

Ash: “I always got the opposite impression personally, like she was taking advantage of Barbra. She's always acting so mean to her. Like with us she's at least trying to be polite, but not so much with Barb. I've been trying to keep an eye for any other red flags like that, but Barbra’s never seemed to mind soooo….”

Greta: “Hey now, let's not start implying Caprica is abusive. It's clear she's done a lot for Barbra, however begrudgingly. Even coming to the bar all these times. It's clear Caprica isn't doing it because she enjoys clubbing. Barbara's always been the one having the most fun.”

Roxy: “Yeah, let's not have this get out of hand with all these accusations.”

Mary: “And more importantly, I want better feedback on my theory! I mean of all the reasons why it could be wrong, I'd hope for better than something like “Barbra is acting way too crazy to have POSSIBLY been a deranged cannibal serial killer.”

Sparrow: “That Barbra is a certified freak 7 days a week and I love that for her.”

Roxy: “Forget about Barbra, I still don't like the thought that some cannibal serial killer has come over from that town with all the spooky shit going on and is around here terrorizing people!”

Billie: “Once again, she's not following the evidence, she's inventing a ghost story and then finding scary evidence to support the narrative while leaving out any conflicting evidence or context. If it were genuinely something to worry about, this wouldn't be your first time hearing about it.”

Trixie: “Plus it can’t actually be the cannibal serial killer guy, he's super dead.”

Mary-Anne, with a bit of a mischievous tone as she leaned in back to her presentation: “.....You know, I actually found some cell phone video of the guy getting run over I can show everyone.”

To which Billie the bouncer stood up sharply and said: “Nope. Putting my foot down. New rule. No snuff films in the bar.”

Before closing the lid of the laptop.

Mary: “Awwww what? No!”

Trixie: “Killjoy.”

Ash, clearly sarcastic and kidding around: “Yeah, no watching the brutal deaths of serial killers in a bar? What are you, homophobic or something?”

Mary: “It's actually a pretty funny video without much gore or anything. The guy gets run over by a car like 4 times in a row. Like a loony toons character.”

Billie: “I don't care how funny it is, that's the sort of stuff that can get the business in trouble.”

Roxy: “But can't we make an exception this time? I'd feel a lot better for sure knowing that guy is dead.”

Billie replies as she straightens out her pants and shirt: “It's almost time for me to start my shift, so might be best to just call it quits here.”

Mary-Anne went back to the laptop to scroll through the list of images she'd gathered for people either missing or dead.

Mary: “Awww, but I didn't even get a chance to go through the list of victims yet.”

Greta: “No, she's right. I think we've seen enough. I doubt this is anything we should be letting Barbra see. Let's just stop here before…”

Sparrow: “Wait. Scroll back up.”

Mary-Anne did as asked, scrolling a bit up again and upon seeing it Sparrows eyes got wide, and she covered her mouth in shock. Prompting a few of the others to look as well. Getting a similar look of surprise.

Ash: “Oh, wow.”

Mary: “What? What is it?”

Ash: “You weren't there that day. So you wouldn't know. But that one?”

She points at a certain picture of a man on the screen.

Ash: “That's one of the guys who grabbed Caprica that day.”

The silence hangs in the air for a moment.

Mary: “This guy?”

Ash: “Yep.”

Trixie: “Okay that's spooky. But one guy going missing is a coincidence at best. Especially the kind of guy who'd behave like he and that other jerk did. I bet he's asking for a fight everywhere he goes. So let's not jump to conclusions. Maybe if they both went missing that might be a…”

Mary: “Well let's see! What did the other one look like?”

She said with a bit of excitement, scrolling through the rest of her list of missing persons.

Billie:“.... He looked like that.”

Mary: “Huh?”

Billie stepped over, and used the laptop trackpad to scroll a bit upwards, then pointed at a specific picture in the list of missing persons. The picture of the second guy who had tried to hit on Caprica that night.

Mary: “Thats him.”

The air hung still for a moment, the weight of the realization sinking in. Trixie Being the first to break the silence with,

Trixie: “..... Well shit, Barbra and Caprica might actually be some kind of serial killers.”

Another moment of silence, until

Ash: “.....Good for them.” The humor of the response breaking the tension with an indignant, though slightly giggly response of Sparrow: “Ash! Oh my god!”

Ash: “What? Am I supposed to be upset that a pair of creeps who snuck into a gay bar and try to sexually harass the shortest lesbian they could find in the club, and right in front of her girlfriend no less, have gone missing? Good riddance if you ask me.”

Sparrow looked between the women nervously before her gaze settled on Billie: “For real though, should we… call someone about this?” Mary: “What happened to helping bury the bodies?”

Trixie: “Would probably be burying Barbra if you sent the police after her.”

Sparrow: “What?” Trixie: “Seriously, what the fuck do you think would happen if we called up the police and told them that a lesbian trans woman MIGHT be involved in the disappearance of two men? And not only that, but that we’re suspicious of her being involved in their disappearance because she got into a fight with these two dudes when they tried to “correct a woman from the deviancy of homosexuality”. You might as well be broadcasting “Hey dudes! Free target practice over here! Feel free to shoot this woman as many times as you want, because no jury is going to condemn you for murdering a butch trans woman!” to almost every trigger happy misogynist dirtbag in town.” Greta: “I knew this was going to be a mistake….”

Billie let off a sigh: “Trixie is right. We could easily be putting Barbra’s life at risk based on a coincidence she had nothing to do with. Whereas it would be a roll of the dice if it even mattered to law enforcement if she were actually guilty or not.”

Sparrow: “....I guess you’re right.”

Roxy: “Man I told y'all this was gonna be a bad idea. Now yall are speculating about turning Barbra over to the police. But you know what? I’m with Ash on this one! Even though Mary-Anne’s been trying to freak us all out trying to link all these murders to Barbra, the only real evidence we have is that two wannabe date rapists who happened to get into a fight with Barbra have now gone missin. And even if Barb and Caprica did off those two, then good on em for actually being proactive in getting rid of creeps like that. Long as they’re sticking to cleaning up trash like that, and aren’t going after any of the people I care about or who have the good sense to just be minding their own business, then I couldn't give less of a shit.” Trixie: “I hope Barbra and Caprica did kill those pigs though. Fuck the cops, I wish more of them had been killed.”

Greta: “.....I think it might be best for everyone if we just change the subject and forget the whole thing.”

Mary: “........Do you think maybe Barbra and Caprica might have room for one more in their relationship though?” Sparrow, through laughter: “OH MY GOD!” Ash, also trying to stifle a chuckle: “Dude, don’t go trying to be some couple’s third wheel just because you think they might be serial killers.”

Trixie: “Yeah, what if they say yes and then you find out they’re actually super boring and you just end up being disappointed?” Mary: “A girl can dream can’t she?” Roxy, clearly not taking it seriously: “I’d be more worried about you thinking the worst case scenario here would be them NOT being serial killers.” They continue chatting for awhile about various things before eventually going their separate ways, having all agreed not to tell Barbra or Caprica about this conversation. 

[wlfhardinc]

@akhillaous This is in response to your comment because it’s too long to say it in a reply. Plus this will explain my post for everyone else

Ok this is going to be long. I’m not great at explaining so this won’t be coherent plus this would have been way easier if I had visuals but alas The song of Achilles is a book so I’ll just have to try. In season 1 I think Jayce has more similarities with Achilles and Viktor has more similarities with Patroclus. Achilles and Patroclus were very innocent in their beliefs and whatnot in the beginning of the book. Jayce and V too in season 1. However that’s when Thetis/Mel come in. Yes I know this is kinda weird- I don’t want to compare Mel to Achilles’s mom either but hear me out. Mel sort of manipulated Jayce to do what he did for her benefits . Thetis did the same to Achilles to get what she wanted. Anyway, when Achilles and Patroclus end up going to Troy to fight, it all begins fine. Achilles protects Patroclus as much as possible because Patroclus has no fighters genes whatsoever. Jayce was also kind of protective to Viktor in some ways. My point is everything begins well. Both ships have the same principles. Achilles vows to not kill Hector (because of the prophecy that if he does, he will die) which is what Patroclus also wants, Jayce wants to make the world a better place which aligns with Viktor’s ideology. It is only later on when Achilles starts to get too prideful with all of the newfound fame as aristos aichon (best of all the Greeks) He makes dumbass decisions and Patroclus starts to get a little pissed. This is similar to season 1 Jayce and Viktor. Also I just want to quickly mention the women. Sky and Briseis both have a platonic but great relationship to Viktor and Patroclus. Mel and Deidama both had a romantic relationship with Jayce and Achilles where it is unclear whether they truly loved each other. In the Song of Achilles Achilles seems to have been forced to have sex with her while other perspectives on the Greek mythology says that they loved each other. In arcane everybody has different opinions and perspectives on Jayce and Mel’s relationship. I think those are all the parallels I could muster up for season 1. Next is season 2. In season 2 Jayce=Patroclus, Viktor=Achilles. There are definitely more evident similarities in season 2 I feel like. Viktor obviously leaves Jayce, ending their partnership. Whilst Achilles doesn’t exactly leave Patroclus, they do get into more and more arguments and differences. Viktor goes back to the undercity and becomes Jesus 2.0 or whatever. Achilles becomes prideful and starts getting high on all of the glory he’s receiving. Although both characters still have the same principles, they execute it terribly which leads to some problems with their partners as we know. Viktor goes crazy, Achilles goes crazy. At the end because of Achilles’s mess ups and arrogance, Patroclus basically sacrifices himself. Jayce did the same with Viktor. In the end, Jayce and Viktor sort of die and just become eternal beings or whatever. Patroclus and Achilles are also both dead in the end and also meet each other in the afterlife, becoming eternal beings in a way. However in the Song of Achilles, Patroclus was at first not buried properly which is why he was just a wandering ghost for some time. When Achilles died his situation worsened as literally the only person who would have buried him was dead. Achilles was buried because everyone loved him so there was no way he wasn’t buried. It was only when Thetis decided to let him go to the afterlife that he was able to meet Achilles. I thought that was pretty similar to the ending of Arcane when people would write the names of their loved ones who died during the war and no one wrote Viktor’s name because the only person who would’ve was with him. Also as I said in my post, ‘historians’/the general audience will know both relationships as close friends or brother. I’m sorry that this is so badly explained but I tried my best😭😭

[ponstermenis-writing]

Barely Above Minimum Wage

tags// Disabled Johnny Cade, Christmas Fluff, The Gang is a bunch of troublemakers, Johnny Cade is a sassy man with crutches TLDR; Johnny Cade, a severely underpaid high-school substitute, is forced to deal with some of the most troublesome students (the gang) for a whole day. Godbless.

“Are you free on Wednesday the 16th?”  —is the email he receives incredibly late on Tuesday, the 15th. 

Of course he’s free. He’s fresh out of college and not doing much else but cook and clean in his new apartment just to keep from becoming sedentary. It’s a new town, new state, new country. He barely knows anyone out of work—and even then it’s not much. He’s a substitute so he’s not there as much as other teachers—though with the amount of folks quitting and going on strike he might get a permanent spot. 

”Yes, I’ll be free tomorrow.” He replies, trying to type professionally even as he eyes try to pull themselves shut. He gets sent a paragraph in the next seconds—so she knew I was free, that bitch—that he quickly decides could’ve simply been ‘come in at 7:30 tomorrow morning’. He’s barely able to set his alarm before he passes out. 

Waking up was like being punched in the face. He slammed his fist down on the old alarm clock six times before it shut up—subconsciously he’s already thrown it out the window, but a new one is expensive. 

He takes an ice cold shower and fixes his sleep-riddled appearance. He pulls on a red sweater and blue jeans—adding a scarf, gloves, and a huge varsity jacket for the inevitable walk there. He manages to get out of the house right on time, giving Scott (his ginormous sheepdog) a big fat kiss on the forehead before heading there.

The walk is slow and cold—snow had been leisurely falling all week. It was safe to drive in—especially with the big snow plows—but his dark blue beetle from the 1960s that is moments away from exploding in the parking garage probably couldn’t handle it.  He knows he shouldn’t be walking in the snow—the doctors warned him not to put too much strain on himself, but he does anyway—his crutches get buried and he’s sure it would actually be easier to walk without them. 

He got in a pretty bad car crash right after college. His father had actually come to his graduation—just to spend drive back angrily complaining about how ungrateful he was for not mentioning them in his speech. He was clearly drunk and after a few snide comments from Johnny, he drove both of them off of a bridge and into an empty road below. It had killed him instantly, Johnny had to sit in the smashed car for an hour before they got him out. 

He eventually got control of his legs back. He could drive and walk now—but he couldn’t do either for long without help. He was given crutches—loftstrand was the scientific name, but he liked elbow crutches more. 

“You’re late.” The desk lady says as he walks into the office at 7:43. Her names Scarlet—Johnny likes her well enough, even though she has a tendency to be blunt. Johnny gives her an awkward smile, walking up to here desk. “Bad traffic.” he excuses, rolling his shoulders. 

“You walked here, Johnny, I can see the parking lot from my desk.” She smiles just a little to let him know she’s teasing him. “I’m gonna go out on a whim and say you didn’t read the email?”

Johnny frowns. “I skimmed it.” 

She gives him an exasperated look, handing him a sheet of paper. “We need someone to watch six kids before break starts—I assumed you’d be able to handle it.”

“It’s six kids, why wouldn’t I be able to?” He feels himself getting a little defensive. She’s usually one of the few folks who don’t look down on him—”They aren’t regular kids.” She stands, gesturing for him to follow her. “I’m sure you’ve heard some stories about our most troublesome.” She gestulates, waving her hands about as she talks. “You’ve got the lucky assignment to watch them all.” 

“Why me?” He shivers. He knows he’s not very intimidating—he’s treated like a student more often that he is a teacher. And from word of mouth the only way to deal with those boys is to have them fear you. “Is Tim busy?” Tim Shepard, the only other substitute for this whole school. He’s ten times as scary as Johnny is—Tim’s usually the one to deal with detention, he’s the one Johnny got the horror stories from.

“Yup.” She rolls her eyes. “He’s covering Mr.Sniders English class.” 

“Wonderful.” Johnny groans, pulling off his jacket. “So, what? I just watch them for an hour until they get sent back to their classes?”

She laughs, placing her hand on his shoulder. “That would be too easy! You’ve got the whole day with them.” She pauses at the detention room door. “Good luck!” She gives him a teasing smile before walking off. She must know that he can handle it—she’d disperse them into empty classes if not. But sometimes Johnny likes to be undermined—because how in the world is he going to survive this?

He lets out a loud sigh before entering the room, pleased to find it empty—of course those kids wouldn’t be early, what was he thinking?

Johnny drops his stuff on the large desk in the front of the room, unhooking his arms from his crutches and doing his best to move the seats. He arranges them into a row that’s two seats wide—they have the big science desks in here, which is stupid consider the actual science room doesn’t have any. 

Sometime through his rearrangement—The vice principal rolls around. It takes Johnny a moment until he realizes he’s there. 

This guy, is a HUGE dick.

Because of the amount of ‘hoodlums”’—his words, not Johnny’s—the man’s only job is pretty much to take care of anything that goes wrong. And he loves it—he’ll take any chance to talk down on a teacher or student if they dare break any rule he decides it semi-important. He especially doesn’t like Johnny—purely because they went to rivaling colleges, and the only thing keeping this guy alive is reliving the glory days. 

“Mr.Cade.” He says as walks in—even though he, for a fact, knows Johnny’s first name—startling the other. Johnny sighs, straightening himself before the other can gibe about his posture. “Mr.Sheldon.” He says, plastering on a fake smile.

”I’m sure the receptionist has already made what you’re doing pretty clear,” he begins. Johnny wants to scold him for calling her ‘the receptionist’ but knows it won’t go far. “She gave you the attendance sheet, correct?”

Johnny glances to the paper he left on the desk, nodding. 

“Use your words next time, it commands more respect.” The man scolds. He hands Johnny a few papers—giving him an annoyed look when he takes to long to unhook the crutches from his arm. 

“This paper on top is going to be most important,” he begins, pointing to a sheet with some kind of table on it. “As you can see, each of the student’s names have boxes off to the side. If they do anything  against the rules, I want you to write it down here so they can be dealt with accordingly.” He sucks in a breath, “We aren’t afraid to give them detention over break.”

“Ah, the naughty list.” Johnny says with a joking smile, scanning it over—he couldn’t help but notice that some student’s space for writing was bigger than others. His smile turns into an awkward laugh when he notices the stern look on the man’s face. “This is no laughing matter, Mr.Cade. These kids can do some very serious damage.”

”Right, of course.“ Johnny nods, flipping through the stack. 

“The rest of it is just work that their teachers left.” He pauses. “They don’t have to do it, but if they start getting rowdy I suggest assigning it.” He all but snatches the stack from Johnny’s hands and straightens it out. “I expect I won’t have to see you again today, right?”

”Y-Yes sir.” Johnny says before he can stop himself. The other smirks—he loves intimidating people, Johnny hates that he gave him the satisfaction. “Wonderful.” He says, making his way to the door after setting the tidy pile on Johnnys desk. “Oh, and make sure you turn in that attendance sheet the second they all show up. It’s important we keep a close eye on them.”

”Of course, thank you.” Johnny says, deflating once the door closes.

The bell rings a moment later and he knows they’re gonna start coming in soon. He rushes to his desk—hiding the crutches under his desk and trying to make himself look presentable, draping the jacket over the back of his chair and pulling forth the papers he was given. He doesn’t want to give those kids a single thing to make fun of him for.  Hidden between the papers were what looked like character cards. With little photos of each student in the corner of the page. With their names and student numbers to the left. It looked like each of the teachers had written him actual descriptions of these kids. Which, is so wild that it’s actually funny. 

It’s definitely against some kind of rule…

He skims through a couple anyway.  

Keith Mathews, 

   A jokester. He’ll try to prank just about everyone in the room, watch your back. Even if you don’t get the joke, laugh along. Don’t engage with any of his other shenanigans unless you’re ready for a write up. 

He’d seen the boy in passing once or twice. He was never not laughing or messing with someone. Johnny didn’t realize he was that bad. But after seeing his record underneath the description he decides to never think that highly of him again.

Darrel Curtis, 

   Pretty good kid. Doesn’t like being talked down to, best not to boss him around much. He’s got a tendency to blow up—don’t mess with him or his brothers too much or you’ll deal with the bruising. Careful, he manhandles. 

Johnny has to stop himself from laughing at the description. He’s seen him around a lot. He’s a senior—big on the football team. Johnny thought he was an adult several times. He didn’t realize Darrel was such a troublemaker—he was the most sophisticated on his team, especially compared to that Paul friend of his. 

The door opens before he can read another. He quickly tucks the paper away, no doubt looking very suspicious. He’s not sure how kids would feel about their teachers writing warning descriptions of them, but he doubts it’d feel good. 

A younger looking boy walks in—he’s gotta be a freshman or a sophomore. He’s got auburn hair and big green eyes. He gives Johnny a weird look as he walks past, not saying anything before taking his seat in the back of the room. Johnny can feel the boy staring—no doubt wondering who the rando sitting at the teachers desk was.

“What’s your name?” Johnny asks after a minute, trying to sound friendly and not nervous. The boy looks him up and down, furrowing his brows. “Who are you?” He asks almost accusingly, eyes stuck on him. 

“I—uh, I’m the substitute. Mr.Cade.” He quickly recovers, holding up the badge around his neck with his name on it. The boy gives him an unamused ‘sure you are’ look. “My name is Ponyboy Curtis.” He says before ducking his hand back down to read his book. 

Yeah, great talking to you kid.

Johnny sighs, grabbing the attendance sheet and putting a check next to his name. He makes sure the other isn’t watching before he takes a look at his page. 

Ponyboy Curtis,

   Good student, hardworking. Not much of a troublemaker. But he has the tendency to talk back. He’ll follow anything his friends and brothers do, best to keep them apart. 

Johnny quickly notices that three students have the same last name. He sighs, tucking the sheet away. Clearly, Ponyboy was just a smart aleck who couldn’t keep his mouth shut—not to mention that the ‘does whatever his friends and brothers do’ seems to be made very true. All of the infractions on his record line up perfectly with the others. 

He can’t help his own nervousness as it takes longer and longer for the kids to show up. He heard what they did to the last guy who took Tim’s place. Dumped water on him as he walked in, threw shit and destroyed his things, relentlessly bullied him for having the surname Hancock, and then chased him out to his car with rocks—after, of course, they spray painted it with obscenities that made the devil twitch. 

Not to mention he really hated being in a room alone with this kid. He wasn’t really paying attention to Johnny, but he still felt like a bug under a microscope. 

Two students walk in a moment later. They both give him the same reaction Ponyboy did, heading to a set of two seats in the front corner. “Who are you?” The blonde calls loudly, a dopey smile on his face. “Geez Soda, keep it down.” The black haired boy next to him laughed, though matching his loud tone. 

“I’m the substitute.” Johnny says slowly, figuring out who they were by the photos and putting checkmarks by their names. They both share a look, shaking their heads. “No you ain’t.” The black haired man—Steve, shakes his head. “What are you? Like, 15?”

Johnny decides to not engage—he’s unable to keep his eye from twitching, and he’s sure the two notice. 

The other two walk in with quick succession. They look at him like he’s an alien, refusing to acknowledge him verbally. Johnny sighs when the bell finally rings, ducking his head down. Darrel sits down next to his youngest brother, seemingly not planning to cause trouble either. Two-Bit idles around his desk for a bit—no doubt waiting for him to talk first. Johnny’d knows not to—He sits down beside an empty seat eventually. 

The late bell rings and he decides not to worry about the absentee. He’s going through some of the work papers while they silently watch him—he pretends not to notice. All of them have been given a truckload—even if it’s for the troublemakers, he feels bad giving them this much.

He’s sectioning it all off when the door is thrown open. A blonde with shaggy hair and light eyes saunters in, slamming the door shut being him. Johnny glances up, furrowing his brows. The boy—Dallas—is already staring at him. He looks Johnny up and down before stepping closer. “The fuck are you?” He commands, shoving his hands in his pockets. 

“Your substitute.” Johnny mutters. “Please sit down an—“

Dallas snatches the attendance paper from his hands. Johnny gasps, furrowing his brows. Dallas spends a moment looking over it with a grimace. Johnny tries to stand and take it—his legs buckle awkwardly, the walk in the cold was no doubt gonna ruin his day. He has to use his arms to hold himself upright.

The boys all laugh as Dallas holds it over his head. Johnny fails to grab it several times—he realistically couldn’t get it even if he could stand. Dallas smirks, taking note that Johnny’s teetering one on arm before just barely shoving him back so he falls into his seat. He can’t help his pained wince, squeezing his eyes shut. Dallas gives him a single confused glance before walking back to his seat, paper in hand. 

Johnny doesn’t think it’s worth it. But Mr.Sheldon seemed pretty adamant that he turned it in on time and he’d rather not get torn a new one. With a sigh, he leans down and grabs his crutches from under his desk. He leans on one and pulls himself up, getting his arms inside slower than he’d like.

He knows for a fact that he’d get his ear talked off about needing crutches—students have made fun of him before, even taken them a few times. But when he lifts his head—those boys look mortified. Dallas especially looked like he’d just seen a tragedy. Darrel smacks him on the back of the head, snatching the paper from his hands and walking it to Johnny before he could move. 

Johnny thanks him quietly, setting it down. He glances around the room, furrowing his brows. He gestures for Keith to stand. Which he does immediately, that petrified look still on his face because he no doubt had been planning something to do to him earlier. 

“Can you walk this to the office for me, please?” Johnny asks, handing him the attendance form. Two-Bit’s face twists and he is very obviously holding back a joke about how Johnny couldn’t walk there himself. Instead he just nods. “Don’t take too long, the vice seemed adamant we get it to him.”

Two-Bit just nods before bolting out the door. He knows it’s not smart to send a troublemaker into the hall without supervision. But it’s smarter than leaving six alone in the room, right?

Johnny spares an exasperated glance his way before stepping back behind his desk. He very quickly decides he’s not giving them all that schoolwork. He rummages around in the desk before pulling out a stack of Christmas themed coloring sheets—definitely meant for kindergarten students. He decides it’s better than nothing, pulling himself back up to his feet. He practically hobbles around the room, handing a few of them out. Darrel furrows his brows when he's given one.  "How old do you think we are?" He asks, irritation clear in his voice. Johnny sighs. "It's either this or the buttload of homework your teachers gave out. Which do you prefer?" He raises a brow, getting silence in response. Ponyboy is the only other one to talk to him, taking his paper with a guilty look—no doubt for his friend's behavior. "Sending Two wasn't a good idea." He says just as Johnny begins to turn away. "Huh?" He asks, turning around to face him again. "Keith." He says, like he's an idiot for not knowing what the hell he meant by 'Two'. "Sending him in the hallway by himself wasn't a good idea. You should probably go get him before another teacher does." Johnny frowns. 'Do I look like I can go get him?' is what he wants to say, but instead he just shrugs. Ponyboy doesn't say anything more.  "Hey Johnny," Steve calls, yelling back to him and snapping his fingers like he were a dog he needed the attention of. It didn't help how he perked up at the mention of his name. It takes him a moment to realize that Steve should, most definitely, not know his first name. Johnny looks back at him, noticing a wallet—his wallet, with all of his money and his ID—in his hand and it looks like he's reading off of it. He quickly steps forward and snatches it, tucking it into his back pocket. "How did you—" He begins before shutting his mouth with an audible click.  He can't even turn around for one second, can he? "We need something to color with, man." Steve says with a smirk, eyeing him like stealing his wallet was some sort of achievement. With any other person it would be, but Johnny barely any feeling in his legs right now and stealing something from that general area wasn't a hard thing to do. Johnny hands them a few boxes of colored pencils and lets them hand it out to themselves, already wishing to be home.  The room quickly becomes too silent for his liking—because they were actually coloring. Sodapop literally turned around to show his younger brother his work, to which he received a thumbs up and a comment from Darrel about coloring in the lines. Darrel and Dallas were the only two not coloring. Darrel laid back against the wall with his eyes closed, Dallas just stared at him like he was thinking. Johnny couldn't tell if he felt guilty at all, but quickly decided he didn't care.  After a while he decides the silence is too much to bare. Johnny pulls himself back onto his feet and rummages around the large closet behind his desk. He finds a few Christmas movies and a TV on a cart. He rolls it to the front of the room and rummages through the old VHS's. He doesn't notice Dallas reaching over him until he has one of them shoved in his face. The Grinch, the original animated version. He spares a glance his way, Dallas looks at him expectantly. He can't help his small laugh, tucking the others in the cart before putting in the tape. 

Dallas had the biggest reputation of them all. Johnny wasn't here often—but when he was he always heard his name. Sometimes it was stories of getting arrested—again—or how one of his coworkers had to deal with him doing something-something that day. Grown adults were scared of this seventeen year old.

He personally doesn't get it.  Johnny sits back down at his desk with a sigh, happy to not be on his feet any more. Most of them are still coloring away, sparing occasional glances up at the TV. Dallas is very obviously pretending not to watch the movie, Darrel has one eye peaked open to look too.  He wonders why all of the other teachers seemed so horrified at the very mention of these kids. Sure, they are a little obnoxious—but anyone with patience could deal with them for the day.  Then, a loud, angry knock is heard on the door. 

He should’ve knocked on wood. 

Everyone’s heads shoot up. Ponyboy gives him a knowing look, Johnny not-so-gracefully rushing to get the door. 

Mr.Sheldon has Two-Bit by the back of his jacket collar—like someone holding a kitten by the scruff of its neck, but the kitten is an evil ginger who apparently can’t be trusted alone for two seconds. “Mr.Cade. A word?” The vice principal askes through gritted teeth, all but shoving the other in the classroom while he chuckles. Johnny spares a glance back before following the man outside, shutting the door behind him. 

“What did he do?” Johnny asks, feeling nervousness rise in his chest. Mr.Sheldon is bigger than him, and meaner. He also has no problem getting in his face and yelling, no matter how much people tell him not to. “He’s been going around playing ding-dong-ditch! Do you know how many calls I received in the last ten minutes?!”

“I…how is he even doing that? We don’t have doorbells.”

”Well, we’ve got a comedian on our hands! He’s been making doorbell sounds with his mouth loud enough to disrupt whole hallways! What the hell were you thinking!?” His voice gets louder and louder and Johnny backs himself against the door. He’s very much regretting foregoing his crutches. 

“Well, I thought it’d be better than leaving them all alone in there. They cause more trouble together than—“

”Use your brain! Call someone down to pick it up, you imbecile!” Mr.Sheldon is positively fuming, his cheeks are red and he’s slowly getting closer and closer to hysterics. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t—“

“Think? Yeah, I can tell.” He lets out an angry sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose between two fingers. “You’d think after being in America for five years, you’d understand how things work around here.” He grumbles. Johnnys too petrified to comment. “From now on—if anyone has to leave the classroom, I want you to call up to the office and get a chaperone.”

”Yes sir.” Johnny nods, grasping onto the door handle to keep himself upright. 

“You haven’t been working here long. If you keep messing up like this it’s only a matter of time before you get fired.” Johnny knows it’s a thinly veiled threat. The man had threatened his job several times before—its not like he really has the power to get him fired, but just the mention sends a shiver down his spine. “Of course.” He nods, sparing a glance back at the incredibly silent classroom. All of them are staring through the small window on the door. The boys in the back of the room quite literally got up to watch. 

“I hope we won’t have to have this conversation again.” Is all the man says before walking of, the soles of his too-shiny shoes slapping against the linoleum loud enough to make the other flinch. 

Johnny sucks in one final gasp of air, turning and letting himself back inside. He manages to make it to his desk without fumbling too hard,  ducking his head down to not see the stares of the others. 

“Good going Two,” Dallas says sarcastically, loud enough for the whole class to hear. “You got the cripple in trouble.” 

Johnny’s head shoots up. He’s used to being called that, it’s not a shock to him anymore. But he still wants to smack that boy so hard his nappy hair comes off. Sadly, there isn’t much he can do without actually getting fired. It’s clear that the initial shock of him being on crutches has worn off. Now he’ll have to deal with his least favorite part about having them. 

Two-Bit chuckled at Dallas’s comment, but his face faltered at the look on Johnny’s face. He doubts any of these kids are capable of feeling remorse for more than three seconds, but Two is kind enough to not say anything further. It could partly be Darrel glaring down his back too.

They are quiet for a while. Johnny replaces the movie when it ends, nobody acknowledges him. There’s the occasional snickers and menial trouble-making.

Dallas balls up his paper and lobs it at Johnny’s head. Johnny simply ducks out of the way and lets it hit the back wall. Dallas looks annoyed—Johnny quickly realized it was more because he didn’t yell at him instead of his horrible shot. 

Not long after, Two-Bit stands and gets behind Johnny’s desk. Johnny keeps his eyes down and lets him pick up the chalk. He scratches away for only a minute before snickering and walking back to his seat. 

Johnny spares a glance at the board when Two has his backed turned—it read “#1 Crip” with a crudely drawn hand holding up a gang sign and an arrow pointing to his head. He simply rolled his eyes and went back to his work, much to the red-heads chagrin. 

They get a little rowdy when Two-Bit starts getting bored again. “Hey, Johnny—“ he calls loudly. Johnny glances up at him—he honestly doesn’t care about them knowing his first name, but he’d hate to have them find him outside of school. “How old are you, man?” He asks, leaning his head in his hands. 

Johnny sighs. “I’m 22. Why do you ask?”

Everyone’s heads eventually shoot up one by one. Two-Bit opens his mouth to speak, Steve interrupts. “No you ain’t.” He says in disbelief, looking him up and down. “Man, you’ve gotta be younger than us.” 

Johnny can feel his own teeth grind together. There is nothing he hates more than the ‘young’ comments. He understands he doesn’t quite look his age. He’ll never understand why it’s such a big deal. 

“How would that work? I’ve already been through college.” 

“So, you ain’t one of them ‘student—teachers’?” Sodapop asks, squinting his eyes. Johnny simply shakes his head, already having enough of this conversation. “So—you’re old enough to drink and shit?” Two-Bit snickers. Johnny has a sinking feeling the man knows what being drunk feels very well. 

“Legally, yes.“

”Do you?” Dallas askes, leaning back in his seat and raising his brows. “I’m not answering that.” Johnny deadpans. “Cus’ it’s true?” Dallas asks, leaning forward on the desk with a smirk—He’s much like Two-Bit in the fact that he can’t sit still, the chair creaks as he moves. Johnny has to hold back an annoyed groan. The only thing that saves him from this harrowing conversation is Darrel standing up.

He watches in confusion for a second before realizing he’s going to leave. “Wait—“ Johnny calls as he gets his hand on the door. Darrel spares a single glance back at him before continuing on, exiting the room just as he gets his crutches under his arms. 

He’s able to catch up before he gets to the staircase, standing in front of it. Darrel rolls his eyes, crossing his arms and glaring down at him—which is really easy considering he’s a whopping 6’3 and Johnny’s on the cusp of 5’7—and that’s without his permanent slouch.

”Move.” 

“I’m sorry, you have to wait for—“ Johnnys begins, catching his breath. Darrel puts his hand up to silence him. “Get out of the way. I’m not Two-Bit, I won’t do anything stupid.” He groans, uncrossing his arms and somehow looking more intimidating. Johnny can’t help his own stutter, praying the younger won’t simply crush him for being in his way.

“Look, it’s not that I don’t trust you—but if you get caught—“

”Then I won’t.” He says with a sense of finality. Before Johnny can respond—Darry grabs him by the elbows, lifts him off the ground with a horrifying ease, and sets Johnny back down safely behind him. 

“You can’t just—“ Johnny begins, his mouth closing with an audible snap when the other turns to glare at him. 

“I’m serious. I don’t need a damn chaperone to go to the bathroom.” Darrel seems to notice just how wide Johnny’s eyes are—he lets his shoulder relax and gives him a guilty look. “You might want to head back before they do anything they’ll regret. I heard some talk of trying to lock you out of the room.” 

Johnny opens and closes his mouth several times—finally he decides to accept defeat, struggling back to the classroom before they could do just that. By the time he got there, the boys were all sitting down and the door opened with no struggle. He wonders if Darrel lied to him to get him to leave him alone—either way, none of his business. 

Darrel did come back a few moments later—no vice principal in sight, thank god. The boy’s all seem rather surprised that Johnny let’s Darrel walk by without any repercussions. They go back to the quiet—shockingly well behaved, for now—students they were before.

It’s not silent for much longer of course, as the lunch bell rings.

Johnny becomes suddenly aware that he didn’t actually inquire about what to do for lunch. Everyone’s heads shoot up, looking at him expectantly.

”Uh—How many of you need to get school lunch?” He asks, though he’s sure none of these boys could even make a sandwich. “We all do.” Darry is the first to answer, standing. 

“Damn are we gonna have to get chaperoned to the cafeteria again?” Two-Bit asks, frowning. “Can you even—like, walk that far?” He turns to Johnny, raising a brow. He actually has to stop himself from taking the stapler and hurling it at his head. “Yes, I can walk that far.” Johnny grumbles between gritted teeth. “Now, sit back down. I have to figure this out.” 

The boys all groan but take their seats.  Johnny grabs the phone on his desk and rings the office, thankful that Scarlet was the one to answer. “Hey Johnny.” She says, he can hear the smile in her voice. “How’s hell going?” 

“Just wonderful.” Johnny mutters, playing with the phone cord. “Look—I wanted to know what they do for lunch. They all have school lunch and someone told me they always need a chaperone.” He and Scarlet have many crude names for the vice principal—but he is the type of person to go over call logs, so they’d best not use them.

”Oh, right.” She says. He can hear her rifle through some papers. “Tim usually just walks them there and back—but with you condition I wouldn’t suggest it.”

“What are you, my doctor?” 

“No. But I saw you hobble up the stairs this morning.” She laughs loudly at her own joke. “I’m not saying you can’t walk them there—if you want you can send me their lunch orders and I’ll grab them for you.” 

Johnnys knows for a fact that everything about these boys scream ‘free or reduced lunch’—he should know, he was on the list too—so they won’t really have to worry about paying for he food. But at the same time, some petty part of him wants to walk there just to prove a point. 

So, he does. 

“I’ll walk you guys there.” He says simply, standing up and pulling the crutches under his arm. A few of them share looks and Johnny knows they want to comment—but they keep their mouth shut. He lets them all out of the room and shuts the door behind him. Tim usually makes them walk in a single-file line—Just to be an asshole—but Johnny doesn’t want to do that. 

The boys look a little surprised when he lets them walk in more of a misshapen circle instead of a line. He also notices that they same to form a bubble around him—whether it’s consciously or not, he’s a little confused by it. They probably just don’t want to be seen being walked in the hall by a teacher—but the way some of them are standing, like they’re trying to be intimidating, makes him wonder if this is their pathetic attempt to protect him. 

A kid going the other way pauses at the sight, staying close to the wall to get out of their way. 

The lunch room is filled with students—way too many for his liking. Johnny gestures for them all to join the lunch line, standing close to the wall to watch them. A few of the students who’ve had him before recognize him, turning around to talk to him.

”Hey, man, look who’s here.” A Soc boy—Jeremy, he thinks his name is—snickers, prodding Johnnys side. The kids in this school have a tendency to treat him less like a teacher and more like a student—he hates it so much it makes his blood boil. “Hello Jeremy.” Johny says with a sigh, giving him a quick smile before going back to watching the troublemakers. 

Jeremy seems annoyed by Johnny ignoring him. “Hey, so are you ever gonna get out of these?” He asks, lightly tugging on Johnny’s crutches and almost making him fall. Johnny takes a tentative step back, forcing his body as close to the wall as it would go. “Stuck with them for life, I’m afraid.” Johnny tries to say in a joking tone. 

Jeremy starts grabbing at them harder—his friends all snicker as Johnny tries and fails to get him to stop. “Y’know, the only way you’ll ever walk right is if you just drop ‘em. Maybe then everyone won’t think you’re one of them special handicapped folk.” 

Johnny just grimaces. Jeremy had manages to tug him away from the wall and closer to their lunch table. He’s about to actually yell at him when Jeremy stops all at once. His eyes are wide and his mouth snaps shut alongside his friends—they all quickly turn back around. Johnny gives them a confused look before following Jeremy’s eyes. 

Darrel stands behind him—lunch in hand—he’s got this menacing look in his eyes that only goes away once they boys completely stop bothering him. He doesn’t dare meet Johnnys eyes and he decides that’s good enough for him. 

Two-Bit and Dallas cause a bit of trouble in the lunch line trying to steal one of the soda’s they keep for the kids who pay extra. It ends up making the whole line pause while the lunch ladies tear into them—leaving Johnny and Darrel standing awkwardly beside each other. 

“Do they always do that?” 

Johnny startles at the suddenness, glancing up at Darrel. He’s got a look in his eyes that Johnny can’t quite understand—some5hing akin to pity. “Huh?” He asks dumbly, furrowing his brows. 

“Do students always mess with you? Even the normal ones?” 

The question makes Johnny pause. The kids all treated him differently then the rest of the teachers—he’s so used to it that he often forgot just how differently they talk to him. 

“Yeah.” Johnny shrugs. “Doesn’t bother me none.”

Darrel grimaces.  “I hope you know we ain’t like that. They just like messing around—they don’t mean anything by it.” Darrel says after a few moments of silence. Johnny quickly realizes that he’s talking about the other troublemakers. “They aren’t all bad. Just—Rowdy, I guess.” He pauses, meeting Johnnys eyes finally. “You’re a lot less scary that Tim is. ‘Makes them think of you more like a friend then a teacher.”

Johnnys know not many people think of him as an adult, but—Ouch, man, way to rub it in. 

“I know.“ Johnnys shrugs. “I wasn’t the most well behaved kid either, I get it.” 

Darrel gives him an odd look but doesn’t say much else. The rest of the boys join them and they walk back to class. They get a little louder as they go down the stairs—trying to shove each-other down for shits and giggles. Steve knocks into Ponyboy on accident and makes him drop 99% of his lunch on the floor. 

“You dick!“ The youngest shouts, shoving him back. 

“Sorry, man, you were in the way.“ Steve says simply, snickering a little alongside Two-Bit. Ponyboy groans loudly, scooping all of his now inedible—the grounds here haven’t been washed in years—food onto the ground and tossing it in a trash can at the end of the stairwell. 

“I’ll give you some of mine.” Soda whispers, nudging him lightly. 

They get to the classroom and Soda hands Ponyboy a decent handful of fries before letting him walk back to his seat. Johnnys not sure why but he feels guilty—he doubts these boys are in a much better situation then he was growing up. Reluctantly, he pulls out his lunch and moves the water bottle and carrots off to the side.

He stood and handed the container with his actual meal to Ponyboy. Pony gives him an odd look, opens it, grimaces, and looks back up at him with a ‘what is this?’ look. 

“It’s cacciucco. Try it, you’ll like it.” Johnny says, handing him a fork and walking off. Darrel gives him a look that’s almost thankful before looking down at the food, matching Pony’s expression. Ponyboy looks up and Johnny—who’s watching him expectantly—before taking some of it on the food and putting it in his mouth. 

Johnnys fully aware that most of the people here think Italian food is just spaghetti and pizza—which, yeah he had a lot of both of those growing up… but there’s better stuff too.

Pony’s eyes go wide and he goes to take another bite, A few of the boys turn in watch in awe as he eats something that no doubt looks unappetizing. Two-Bit leans back and takes some before Ponyboy can stop him—squeezing his eyes shut like he’s preparing for something horrible, before nodding and whispering to the rest of them that it’s ‘actually really good’. 

Johnny’s happy to see them all try some and like it—Steve comments that Ponyboy should thank him, seeing as he wouldn’t have gotten it without him. 

By the time they’re done eating, Tim Shepard rolls around. He knocks on the door before walking in, effectively scaring all of them into thinking the vice principal is back. 

The boy’s all share exasperated looks when Tim peeks his head inside the room. Tim rolls his eyes, sauntering to Johnnys desk and looking out at them all before glancing back down at Johnny. “How’s the doghouse?” He askes, raising an amused brow.

“I dunno, haven’t been to your place in a while.” Johnny replies before he can stop himself. A few of the boys snicker—which reminds him that they are there—oops. Tim ignores his comment by sticking his tongue out at him before looking back up at the students. 

“You haven’t been too annoying, have you?” He announces to the room, squinting his eyes at Dallas and Two-Bit in particular. 

“They’ve been fine, Tim.“ Johnny says before Dallas can show the man a very specific hand gesture. “Whatever you say.” Tim says like he doesn’t believe him, shoving his hands in his pockets. It’s silent for a moment—Tim clearly wants to say something. Johnnys not sure if he wants to hear it. 

“Are you here for a reason or are you just bored?” He asks finally. Tim leans back on his desk, giving him a fake look of sadness. “Wow, can’t even make sure you’re okay without you yelling at me.” He complains, kicking Johnnys leg lightly just because he knows Johnny can’t do it back. “I actually am here for a reason, though.” 

Johnny raises a brow. 

“They we’re handing out shit for the teachers—y’know how they are around the holidays. Snagged us both some.” He says, pulling a bag of candy out of his back pocket. 

“Thanks,” Johnny smiles, tucking it into the desk. “I don’t think you have to ‘snag’ it, though, seeing as we are both teachers too.” Tim shrugs. “Old habits die hard.” He says simply. It takes a second for them both to notice everyone is staring at them. “What?” Tim asks loudly, tone changing to a more annoyed one that Johnny’s used to hearing. 

“Didn’t know you were capable of having a civil conversation.” Darry is the first to respond, raising his brows. Tim rolls his eyes, flipping him off before turning back to Johnny—who looks rather shocked. “You can’t just give the middle-finger to a student, Tim.” He says, exasperated, slapping the other on the arm. 

“Man, I’m telling you—the school board does not care with these guys.” Tim whispers, sparing a glance back. “I could go over there right now, and punch Dallas in the face. I promise you I wouldn’t even be suspended.” 

“Don’t talk about punching kids, Jesus.” Johnny whispers back, giving him an unapproving look. Tim just shrugs, pushing himself to his feet. “You boys, behave.” He says, pointing at each student individually before walking off. Dallas manages to actually flip him off this time, getting a stern glare from Johnny. "Hey—you mind feeding the needy, huh?" Steve asks the second time is gone, eyeing the chocolates. Johnny glances at him, glances at the chocolate, and looks back at him again. He takes one out of the bag and hands the rest to him. "Share with the other's, okay?" He says. Steve gives him a look like he's crazy—mainly because he didn't think Johnny'd actually give him any, especially the whole bag. "All of them?" He asks, raising a brow. Johnny just shrugs and goes back to his computer. 

The room gets bored quickly after that. They’ve gone through every movie worth watching, the coloring sheets are done, and Johnny doesn’t know what to do to entertain them. He could just give them the work—but as someone who had to do worksheets over Christmas break, he’s not really feeling like doing that.

Eventually they all start talking, it’s quiet enough that he can’t really hear what they’re saying, but he hears a snicker or two and immediately knows he should be worried. Two-Bit and Dallas stand up at once. “We have to go to the bathroom.” Two-Bit announces, barely holding back a giggle when Dallas smacks him. 

“Together?” Johnny asks, raising a brow. 

Neither one of them respond, looking at him expectantly. Johnny sighs and goes to call the office—the second the phone’s in his hand they both bolt, getting out of the door before Johnny even realizes they moved. He sits there and just gapes at the wide open door for a second. 

He spares one glance at the four still sitting there, before deciding that he’s just going to have to accept defeat and run after them. He stands and pulls the crutches up and under his arms. “Don’t. Move.” He commands, biting off the end of each word. They all nod but immediately stand to watch him leave by sticking their heads out of the door. 

“Is he gone?“ Ponyboy whispers, Johnny disappearing down the other end of the hall. “I dunno, Pony—What do you think?” Steve teases, rolling his eyes and re-entering the classroom. 

“Y’know, we could’ve just pretended we were talking to him and then steal the paper.” Darrel says, leaning on the door frame. “That would take all the fun out of it!” Sodapop smiles, sitting down at the teachers desk and rummaging through the papers. 

They all knew about the ‘naughty list’. Of course they did, every teacher who ever had to deal with them got one. None of them wanted to stay in school during Christmas break—Darry usually wouldn't allow this, but he had work and couldn't miss it. Sodapop and Steve go through the papers on the desk while Darrel and Pony keep watch for the door. They doubt Johnny's gonna catch either of them—but any other teacher could come barreling in here.  Their plan wasn't foolproof by any means. They were just gonna stash the paper someplace and hope Johnny doesn't notice until the end of the day—he doesn't seem like the kind of guy to actively try to get them in trouble, Darry thinks he's a bit of a doormat. If his employer talked to him the way Mr.Sheldon did, it'd be brought right to corporate.  "Found it!" Soda exclaims waving the paper around in the air. Steve snatches it from his hands to stash it—he pauses when he takes a good look at it, furrowing his brows. All three of the others simultaneously ask why he's doing it, crowding around them. Did he write scathing accounts of whatever they had done that day? Did he make up crazy things to get them in trouble? No.

In fact, he didn't write anything.  The paper was left exactly like it had been handed to him—aside from a few doodles on the margins.

"Huh?" Darrel mutters, taking it from Steve. He was sure his run to the bathroom would at least be mentioned. If he pulled that with Tim in charge he would've been dragged right to the office. "So we just did all of that for nothing?" Pony asks, crossing his arms. He hadn't done much of anything—Johnny didn't really talk, so he didn't even have the opportunity to say something snarky. And hey, he's not gonna be an ass to the guy who gave him free food.  "Looks like it.” Darrel mutters, setting the paper back down. “Maybe they gave him more than one.” Steve says, already going back to the now messy pile. “Surely.“ Soda agrees, joining him. 

They had gone through the whole stack and were in the middle of putting it back when Ponyboy jumps and starts whisper-yelling. “He’s coming!” He says frantically. “I just saw him at the end of the hall, hurry up!” 

They all bolt back to their desks, leaving some of the papers awry but hopefully not enough to be noticeable. 

Johnny walked in with Dallas and Two-Bit the collar, both bent in half because he couldn’t quite keep his arms up. Two practically face-plants when he lets go, scrambling back to his desk without a word. Dallas goes back to his desk as well, resting back on his hands. “Did you hide it?” He asks, looking back at Steve and Sodapop, only loud enough for them to hear.

”No—he didn’t write anything on it.”

”Seriously? Talk about a doormat.” Dallas scoffs, sparing a glance Johnny’s way. He sleeve was caught on his crutches and he was currently trying to pull them free. 

“Did he seriously catch you guys?” Ponyboy asked. Leaning forward to peak around his older brother. “Are you kidding? Of course not.” Dallas says, turning to face him fully. “Tim saw us and helped him out.” He pauses. “Do you seriously think that cripple could catch me? If the cops of New York City can’t—“

Dallas gets a tap on the shoulder—He gives Two-Bit and odd look, but the redhead is just staring forward. Dallas turns to see what he’s looking at. Johnny is glaring at him, he’d no doubt heard what he said. 

“My bad, man.” Dallas shrugs, turning to face him fully. “You get it though, right? It’s not like you don’t know your legs are fucked up.” 

Darrel gives him a hefty smack on the back of the head for that comment. But of course, Dallas takes note that he’s getting under the man’s skin—he can’t help but see how far he can go. 

“He’s been a cripple his whole life, it’s not like he’s not used to it. It’s just the truth.” Dallas says to Darrel, turning only he head to look back at him. “I mean, even if he could walk right—he’s like 5’2, he couldn’t catch me anyway.” When he faces forward again—Johnny’s right there. 

He gets a slap so hard that the sound reverberates off the walls—there’s a red handprint on his cheek, and the skin is hot to the touch when he reaches up to touch the stinging skin in disbelief. 

“Don’t you dare call me that again.” Johnny bites, a tone that’s uncharacteristic for him. “I am not a cripple, I am not a child,” he glances up at the rest of the room. “and I certainly don’t need pity from a bunch of angsty teenagers who can’t seem to keep their shit together for more than ten minutes.” Everything is said in a cold, biting tone. Every boy in the room sits and watches with wide eyes and open mouths. 

“And by the way, you clearly aren’t that hard to catch—seeing as you’ve been in prison six times in the last 8 months.” He practically sneers, his hands curling into fists. “Now sit down, do your work, and stop acting like the drop-outs everyone knows you’re gonna be.” 

He doesn’t give the blonde a moment to respond, going and sitting back at his desk. Dallas sits there for a moment, gaping with his hand still on his cheek. Just as he’s about to get up and give the man a piece of his mind, he hears slow clapping from the doorway. 

Tim leans against the frame, clapping slowly and giving Johnny a surprised-yet-proud smile. “See, this is why I like this guy.” He laughs, standing up. “John, can I talk to your for a second?” 

Johnny sighs but stands up, giving the room one final glare before heading outside and slamming the door shut behind him. It takes only a single second before they stand and go the door, trying to hear their conversation. 

“You alright?” Tim asks, nudging him.

”Of course I’m alright.” Johnny says, crossing his arms. “We weren’t that obnoxious when we were kids, were we?” 

“You weren’t, I probably was.” Tim chuckles. 

“I just don’t get it—When I was their age, I couldn’t stand it if an adult didn’t like me.” Johnny says, tightening his fingers around his biceps. “Did I do something to make them hate me? Am I that annoying?”

Tim scoffs, smacking him upside the head lightly. “Don’t say shit like that.” He scowls, shaking his head. “And no, you’re not. They were worse with me when I first came around. Honestly, they still probably treat you better than they do with me.” Tim pauses, glancing down at the boy. “They all didn’t deal with uh—what you did, y’know? It’s still a miracle to me that you weren’t just like they were.” 

Johnny rolls his eyes. “The only reason I ever did anything right was to get out of that house.” He shrugs. “Besides, the only reason they treat me better than you is because they pity me. And yet, I don’t think I’ve ever been called a cripple more times in my life.”

Tim sighs, glancing back at the door. “I can smack ‘em all real good for you, if you need.”

”I kinda already did.” Johnny scratches the back of his neck. “I oughta apologize, huh?”

”Did he apologize to you?” He says it like he knows who it was—but then again, he could probably guess. Even if he didn’t have a bright red handprint on his face, Dallas’ll always be an asshole. Johnny thinks for a moment and shakes his head. “Then don’t apologize to him. Lord knows he doesn’t deserve it.”

Johnny doesn’t say anything, furrowing his brows. 

“I got something that’ll get you in a better mood.” Tim says finally. “How about you come over to mine tonight, huh? Curl’s has been missing you.” 

“Has he?” Johnny laughs. “Guess I can’t say no to that, huh?”

”No, you can’t.” Tim says matter-of-factly. “I’ll see you tonight, good luck.” 

Back in the room, the boys all listened with the same horrified looks on their faces that they had earlier. 

“Good going, Dal.” Pony says, kicking him lightly. “You pissed off the one teacher that wasn’t an ass.”

”Watch your mouth, Pony.“ Darrel scolds before he can stop himself. “You’d better apologize to him, Dallas.” 

“Yeah, yeah. I will.” He mutters—trying and failing to hide that he was a little upset with himself too. “I didn’t think he’d care that much.”

”Bullshit.” Steve says, rolling his eyes and getting back to his seat. They all are sat by the time Johnny enters the room again. He gives them all a suspicious look before heading back to his desk, squinting his eyes at the messed up papers. “Did you guys mess with these?” He askes. 

Ponyboy, fearing a slap of his own, quickly shouts—

“No sir!” 

Johny just gives him an odd look before putting everything in a neat stack and carrying on. The room is deathly silent for a few minutes—all of them refusing to speak or move. They all stare at him expectantly, jumping when the man lifts his head up. 

He sighs, pushing himself to his feet, foregoing the crutches and just leaning on the desk. 

“I apologize for my outburst.” He says, giving an awkward smile. 

“Dallas deserved it—“ Two-Bit begins, getting a loud smack on the back of his head from the blonde beside him. Johnny can’t help but laugh, shaking his head. 

He spares a glance out the window and smiles, an idea forming in his head. “How about I make it up to you, huh?” He says, catching everyone’s attention. “We might be able to sneak outside if anyones quiet in the hallway. I’m sure Tim’ll cover for me.”

It’d been snowing for the last few days—it was finally starting to stick and was at just the right height to go outside in. While just about all of them were much too old to go outside and play in the snow, they all jumped at the opportunity. 

“Really?” Ponyboy asks excitedly, causing his brother to laugh. 

“Eh, why not.” Johnny shrugs. 

The group immediately stands and begin to talk excitedly—no teachers have let them play outside in the snow since elementary. Johnny ducks around the desk and grabs his crutches, struggling to get them under his arm while the boys all but tug him along. Darry shoos them all away—he attempts to help Johnny walk, only to be shoved off. 

“I can walk just fine.” Johnny says, glaring at him before he can stop himself. Darry blinks at him for a moment before nodding, shoving his hands in his pockets awkwardly. “So empowering.” Two-Bit snickers, getting shoved half-way to the ground for it. Johnnys barely able to grab his jacket from his chair before he’s dragged out of the room like a rag doll. 

They all head out of the classroom quietly. Once again, the boys seem to walk around Johnny in a protective circle of some kind. He can’t help but roll his eyes.  Johnny ducks his head in Tim’s classroom and all but begs him to cover for them—to which he says he’ll try his best. They all grab their gloves and scarves out of their lockers, Darry has to strangle Dallas with one until he wears it. Johnny let’s Steve and Soda sneak into the gym and steal a football before they all head outside. 

Johnny takes them out to the football field—which is just far away enough from the office for no authority to see them but close enough to be on campus. Johnny opens it with his keys and lets them all inside, shutting the fence gate behind them. He lets them all run off—Ponyboy face-plants within minutes, and Dallas is already trying to climb the fence and leave.

Its just tall enough that he knows nobody’ll make it—Johnny’d climbed a lot of fences as a kid, he knew the right heights that wouldn’t let anyway through. Eventually Dallas gave up and joined the rest of them. 

Darry soon joined Johnny on the sidelines, watching the boys play. 

“You’re not gonna join them?” The older asks, gesturing to the group currently tossing a football back and forth. Darry scoffs, shrugging his shoulders. “I’m too old to be playing in the snow.” He says, shaking his head. 

“Are you now?” Johnny asks with a laugh—in his eyes, all of them are kids. Darrel doesn’t quite seem to like that. “I don’t see what you’re laughing about. If you joined in every’d think you were Pony’s age.” 

Johnny pauses, furrowing his brows and looking up at him. “Hey, I’m still an adult, y’know. You’d better watch what you say.” He says with no real malice behind it. Darrel raises a brow. “You’re only a few years older than me.”

Johnny squints up at him. “I’m three years younger than you.” Darrel adds, making the other all-but gasp. “Huh? Aren’t you a little old to be a senior, then?” Johnny asks, looking him up and down.

Darry seems to think for a second—like he’s deciding if he wants to say something. Finally, he does. “I had to take a gap year because my parents died.” He pauses. “Someone had to provide for the family.”

Johnny looks utterly horrified, ducking his head down quickly. “Oh my good—I’m so sorry, I didn’t—“

Darrel laughs, ruffling his hair—if he hasn’t just got the ‘dead parents’ answer, Johnny would smack him just as hard as he smacked Dallas. “It’s alright.” Says Darrel, still laughing. They are silent for a second, Johnnys face still masked in absolute horror. 

“Since we’re asking personal questions,” Darry says finally, looking down at the other. “How exactly did you get you crutches? It doesn’t seem like you’ve always had them.” 

Johnny grimaces. 1, because he pretty much just said it’s clear Johnny has no clue what he’s doing. 2, because he’d rather have a heart attack and die then answer that damn question. “That’s too personal. I’m not telling a student that.” He says simply, shaking his head. 

“You asked me about my dead parents.”

Johnnys gapes. “That’s because I didn’t—“ He cuts himself off with a loud sigh, his body tensing when Darry looks at him expectantly. “My dad drove me off a cliff after my graduation.” 

Now, It’s Darrel’s turn to look horrified. 

“Oh.” He mutters, averting his gaze. “Did he…mean to?” He asks, quickly adding—“I’m sorry, I should ask that—“

”Of course he did.” Johnny says like it’s no big deal, kicking his feet in the snow. “I think he wanted to kill me. He never did like me much.” 

Darry stares at him for a long while, Johnny refusing to look him in the eye. He’s not quite sure why he told the boy that—he really wished he just lied.   “I heard what you and Tim were saying to eachother.” Darry says finally.  Johnny shrugs. “I figured there was a reason you guys were being so nice to me.”  ”It’s not—“

”Pity?” Johnny askes, raising his brow and finally look at him. Darry makes a guilty face before he can stop himself. “It’s okay, man, I’m used to pity by now.” Johnny gives him a sweet smile. “I mean, look at me!” 

Darry just grimaces, shaking his head. He looks like he wants to say something else but keeps his mouth shut. Johnnys already looking around for an excuse to get out of this conversation, Steve and Soda give him an excuse—wrestling in the snow. 

“Hey!” He calls, taking a step forward. They both pause, look at him, an then get right back to it. Johnny rolls his eyes, walking up to them and managing to pull Soda off of him. “None of that, okay? If any of you get hurt, I’ll get in trouble.” 

Soda gives him a guilty look. 

Johnny raises an expectant brow.

”We won’t!” Steve says finally, pulling himself to his feet. Soda nods quickly. Johnny just rolls his eyes, giving them one lalook before going back to the sidelines. 

Darrels looking at him with wide eyes—Johnny doesn’t have to wonder why for long. 

“Your jacket—“ he says, furrowing his brows. Johnny gives him a confused look before looking begins himself—he’s wearing his college’s varsity jacket, since it’s the warmest one he owns. “Yeah, what about it?”

“Did you go there?”

Johnny gives him an odd look—why would he wear a jacket for a college he didn’t even go to? He had done his last two years of High-school in America, and ended up getting a full-ride to The University of Oklahoma—more specifically, the Norman campus. 

“Yeah, man.” Johnny laughs. “Why do you ask?”

”I uh—“ Darrel rights himself, like he’s trying not to fangirl. “It’s where I want to go. I heard they had a really good football team.” He says, shrugging. Johnny glances up at him, smiling. “They were pretty good, as much as I remember.” He says—it’s clear Darrel wants to ask, so he keeps going. “I bet you have a chance—I got in on a full-ride soccer scholarship, and I wasn’t half as good as you are at football.”

Darrel gives a weird look—Johnny can’t help but get defensive. 

“I wasn’t always on crutches! I wasn’t a pity player, I swear.” 

“That’s not why I looked at you like that.” Darrel says, looking him up and down. “You got a full-ride sports scholarship and you…chose to be a teacher?” 

That catches Johnny off guard. He knows that it’s becoming more and more obvious to the general public that teachers make shit salaries, but he’s never had a kid comment on it….to his face. His mouth opens and closes for a minute. “Well—I can’t exactly play soccer, can I?” He says finally, making the other laugh. 

“I-I’m sorry, I shouldn’t laugh.” Darrel rights himself—giving Johnny a guilty look. “It’s okay, you were supposed to.” Johnny shrugs, leaning back and forth on the balls of his feet. 

They’re silent for a few minutes, watching the rest of the boys tackle each other and lug a football at each other's heads. It’s cLear Darrel wants to say something, he waits until Johnny’s messing with the rubber handle of his crutches. 

“If it’s you jacket, why’s it so big?” Darrel asks finally, glancing down at him. 

Okay, ouch. 

“Well, uh…” Johnny scratches the back of his neck. “I couldn’t really afford me own… I got this one for free—but I didn’t get to choose the size.” 

Darrel gives him a look that he can’t quite comprehend, he’s spared a look Dallas’s way. Not that he has time to wonder what that means, it seems the second he’s looking away they’re already plotting against him again. 

He feels the biting cold of the snow before he realizes he’s laying face first in it. Someone’s on top of him—Jesus, this guy needs to lose some weight—and rolls off just as fast as he jumped onto him. 

Johnny hears a loud bout of laughter and realizes it’s Two-Bit, pushing himself up to a kneel and seeing firey red hair. “Sorry man!” Two manages between laughter. “You just—God! That was funny!” 

Johnny blinks at him twice before rolling his eyes. 

He goes to stand, someone grabbing his arm and dragging him to his feet. He can’t help that yelp that leaves his mouth at the unexpected contact. He looks at the perpetrator, seeing Dallas Winston of all people. Dallas hands him his crutches without looking at him, kicking Two-Bit in the ribs twice as he scrambles to his feet. 

“Uh—Thanks.” Johnny mutters, getting his arms back in the crutch. 

“No problem. He’s an asshole.” Dallas shrugs, shoving his hands in his pockets quickly. Johnny watches and sees his shiver, frowning. Dallas doesn’t have a scarf, gloves, or a hat like the rest of them do. He’s got a thick leather jacket, dark jeans, and cowboy boots. And as someone who grew up wearing something similar in this weather, Johnny can’t help but feel bad. 

“Are your hands cold?” He asks. Dallas opens his mouth—no doubt to say no—but Johnny has already taken his off and has them thrusted towards his chest. Dallas blinks one, twice, then shoved them back towards him. “Those want fit me.” He says like a petulant child, shoving his hands in his pockets again. 

There’s an odd look on his face—one that only got worse when Johnny handed him his gloves. It takes him a moment to understand what it is. 

Guilt.

Dallas let’s out a sigh, rolling his shoulders like he’s gearing up to talk. 

“Look,” he begins. “I’m sorry for what I said earlier—I was being a douche.”

Johnny has to stop himself from gasping. Dallas was known for never apologizing—he kicked a pregnant teacher in the stomach in sixth grade, when the principal told him he could’ve hurt the baby, he said she could just open her legs and make another just as easy. Last year he slammed a kids head into the locker so hard that it gave him a concussion, and he just shrugged it off.

One glance to the left and he can see Darry pretending not to watch them, he’s sure that the other is making Dallas do this. 

“It’s alright, I’m used to it.” He quickly realizes that’s not the argument he thought it was. Dallas looks even more miserable, shaking his head. “You shouldn’t be, man. It ain’t right to say shit like that.” He pauses, finally making eye contact. “Darry uh—told me what happened.”

It doesn’t take Johnny long to realize he means the crash. He’s about to send a glare that boy’s way, before realizing there is no way he could’ve told Dallas that in the amount of time it took Two-Bit to get off of him. He was definitely listening to their conversation. Little creep.

“It’s nothing to feel bad about.” Johnny says, not looking at him. “You’re a kid, it’s kinda’ your job to talk bad about adults, huh?”

Dallas blinks at him. “You really don’t care?”

Johnny just shrugs. 

It takes Dallas a moment to do anything. He digs a hand in his back pocket and pulls out two twenty’s. “I stole this when you weren’t looking.” He says guiltily, letting Johnny snatch it from his hands and tuck it back in his wallet. “I can’t even hate this, it’s pretty impressive.” Johnny was sure he hadn’t turned his back to Dallas for more than two seconds. 

Dallas, once again, looking utterly confused when he just accepts it. 

He spares a glance behind Johnny’s head, rolling his eyes. “Hey,” he says, nodding to the space behind him. “You might wanna duck.” he says simply. Johnny has no time to react. Dallas grabs him by the jacket collar and tugs him down. When he’s let go, he notices a crushed snowball rolling down his chest. 

“Thanks.” Johnny can’t help but laugh, sparing a glance back at a petrified Steve. Dallas shrugs. “Guess I owe ya’.” 

Johnny looks at him confusedly. 

“You never filled out the list.”

“Huh?” Johnny mutters, still very much not catching on. 

“The list of shit we did? You didn’t write anything down.” Dallas explains, raising a brow. Johnny blinks—when did they get a look at that? 

“Well, you guys didn’t do anything that bad. Not compared to what I expected, at-least.” Johnny shrugs. Dallas once again gives him that guilty look. “That little stunt you and Two-Bit did, running through the halls, pushed me very close to writing something down.”

Dallas looks like he wants to smile but then steels his gaze. Does this guy always try to intimidate the people he’s apologizing to? Because he’s doing a damn good job. “Just because you expected it, don’t mean it’s right.” Dallas says coldly. 

“So… what you’re saying is that you want me to fill it out?” Johnny teases, raising a brow. Dallas opens his mouth to speak, getting a snowball to the side of his face. “Don’t you dare!” Soda, the one who threw it, calls. Dallas wipes the snow off his face and immediately goes to chase the blonde down.

Meanwhile, somewhere across the field, Darrel leans up against the fence. Someone grabs him from behind—he reels around, ready to punch the anonymous person in the face before he sees familiar head of blonde hair.

”Paul?” He asked, confused. “What are you doing here?” 

Paul shrugs. “Got out early.” He says, glancing at the group outside. “What about you? Who let you guys out here?” Darry opens his mouth to speak—but Paul sees him before Darry can answer. “Jeez—that guy, huh?” He grimaces.

Darrel frowns. “What about him?”

“I’ve only had him once or twice.” Paul shrugs, seemingly noticing Darrel’s change in demeanor. ”Theres nothing wrong with him, I mean, other than the obvious.” Paul laughs, cutting it off awkwardly when Darry doesn’t join him. “Y’know, some of the fella’s dads used to go to school with him. Apparently he used to not be able to speak a lick of English.” 

Darry had noticed his accent—but honestly he never would’ve assumed English wasn’t Johnny’s first language. “Good for him, English is hard to learn.” He shrugs. 

Paul deflates a little when he notices Darrel isn’t joining him. Darry’s never been one to make fun of people—but he’ll laugh along if it’s his friends. He’s definitely gotten more stoic ever since his folks died. 

“Let me know if you guys need help messing with him—what did we do last time, key their car?” Paul smiles, nudging him. Darry grimaces. “We’re planning on leaving him alone.” He shrugs. Paul gives him an odd look. “What, Cus’ of his legs? Y’know I think he’d be upset to hear that.“

Darry frowns. “It’s not pity.” He says quickly, too defensively. Paul’s always been good about picking up whats going on with him. 

“Then, what? You taking a liking to the cripple or something?” Paul asks, rolling his eyes when Darry doesn’t answer. “You’ve got a bleeding heart, man.”

Darry wants to defend him—slap Paul I’m the face for calling him that like he did when he called Ponyboy a loser to his face. He hates that he wants to treat Johnny like his little brother. He’s a grown man, he doesn’t need protection. Yet…

”You better watch what you say about him. He slapped Dallas across the face earlier.” 

Paul’s eyes go wide. “Seriously?!” He asks, leaning over the fence to squint at Johnny. “And I thought he was a doormat!” Paul chuckles. “I always thought you were gonna be the first to smack some sense into him.” 

“I still might.” Darry shrugs. 

Paul just chuckles, grabbing him by the shoulders. “Well, call me if you change your mind.” He says, walking off before Darry could answer. Darry just rolls his eyes playfully, turning back to the group. He turns just in time to see Soda frantically trying to escape Dallas Winston. Johnny blows a whistle with his finger just in time—making them all pause and turn to him—Darry might have to steal that tactic. 

“We gotta head back inside.” He calls loud enough for them all to hear.

They all wipe the snow off of themselves as they walk back to the building, following behind the oldest like a bunch of lost dogs. Johnny instructs them all to wipe their shoes off at the door—something Darry’s been trying to get them to do for years, but they listen only now. They make it back to the classroom without a hitch, just moments before the bell rings. 

Johnny startles at the sudden sound, laughing. “Right on time, guys.” He says, pulling his jacket off. None of the boys get up to leave—Johnny gives them an odd look when he notices. 

“Are you guys okay—“ he begins, cut off when half the group come barreling towards him. Ponyboy, Two-Bit, Steve, and Soda all run to him and pull him into a big group hug, Darrel and Dallas watching with a roll of their eyes. Two-But lifts Johnny clean off the ground. “We’re gonna miss you, man!” The redhead cries like a lady who’s husband is going off to war. Johnny frantically tries to push him off, very clearly not happy about his feet not being on the ground. 

“Okay, okay, let go!” Johnny cries finally, Two-But dropping him quickly, careful not to hurt him. “You all realize I still work here, right?” 

“It won’t be the same.” Ponyboy frowns. “Tim’s gonna be in here again…” 

Johnny can’t help but laugh, ruffling the boys hair. “I’ll tell him to cut you guys some slack, okay?” 

They all thank him hopefully—they he’ll still be the worst, it’s Tim Shepard after all, but maybe he’ll let them off easy once or twice. They all leave solemnly, trying to stay behind as long as they can. Darry’s the last out—partly to make sure none of the try to stay behind. Johnny’s a breath of fresh air for most of them, since the moment saw him they liked him more than the other teachers. 

“Thank you.” Darrel finds himself saying, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Jesus, you guys ask like I found the cure for cancer.” Johny laughs, crossing his arms. “I’m just doing my job.” 

“Very well, I’d say.” Darrel smiles. “I mean it, though. I don’t think they’re that well-behaved even with me.” 

Johnny gives him a guilty look. 

Darrel begins to walk to the door, hanging behind a few extra seconds. “Can I…?” He trails off, holding his arms out. Johnny blinks when he realizes he’s asking for a hug. Johnny just shrugs, hugging him first. “Have a good holiday for me, yeah?” He says, smiling. Darry can’t help but smile as well. “I will.” He says. 

Darrel’s not used to being this open around adults—his cheeks burn red when Johnny gives him an odd look, he quickly realizes he’s blocking the door. “Sorry—“ he mutters frantically, stepping out of the way. Johnny just laughs. “You guys are some weird kids, y’know that?” 

Darry just nods, giving him one final goodbye. 

Johnny doesn’t notice something in his pocket until he’s home. He’s reaching to get his keys, a few papers falling out of his pocket. He does his best to bend over and grab them.

Unfolding them, he finds the silly coloring sheets he had given the boys earlier. Darry must’ve slipped them into his pocket when they hugged. Johnny can’t help but smile, already planning on hanging them on his fridge. 

Maybe he doesn’t hate teenagers as much as he thought he did. 

Johnny’s often asked about how he ever got the six most troublesome kids to listen to him—it got out quickly that they had a soft spot for him, especially when they always begged Tim to swap out with Johnny whenever he substituted for them. Every time he got the question he’d just shrug. 

“Guess I got lucky.” He’d say. 

[dustorangeheartssnow]

TAGGED BY @bluegarners and @daringyounggrayson THANK U!!!!!!

TAGGING @danishsweethearts @havendance @saturnaftertaste @biromantic-nerd @your-worst-knightmare

Number of stories posted to ao3: TWO

Word count of works posted last year: 26,177

Fandoms I wrote for: bat….man..

Pairings: all gen

Stories with the most kudos, bookmarks and comment threads: 

Most kudos: the lower and coarser soul

Most bookmarks: New Again

Most comment threads: New Again

Work I’m most proud of (and why): NEW AGAIN! 1) I neverrrr finish multi-chapter works and 2) IT IS AN IDEA I TRULY LOVE and an idea that i have desperately wanted to see executed for a LONG TIME and i am glad to have done it and am pleased as punch with the concept and the angst

Work I’m least proud of (and why): the lower and coarser soul i now think could be punchier and have more economy of language. Reading it back it feels tryhard and a little saccharine 

share or describe a favorite review you received: i got a review on a different fic asking if i would be updating New Again because they really liked New Again—and that was like omg. It really touched my heart that like someone was following my stories and thinking about my first chapter of another fic like enough to ask. New Again was really my baby and I more or less felt like it was me and that work against the world and it wouldn’t be very popular because it’s sort of a cheesy concept and Thomas Wayne Jr also is not too well-loved so it was like THAT ONE??? YOU WANT MORE OF THAT ONE??? And it was because of that comment from theknwing that I actually wrote and posted the next two chapters!!!! I literally would not have done that otherwise. I was so shocked and like omgggg when they asked. So thank u theknwing!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A time when writing was really, really hard: Writing is never hard for me but Having Ideas is REALLY HARD i never have ideas 

A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: 

I always knew I wanted to end New Again on the bittersweet (or just bitter) “watch his face when I leave and see how it falls” with Dick choosing Thomas over Bruce because Dick feels attached to Thomas and too melted-down and undeserving for Bruce, but I didn’t intend initially for the timeskip to be so many years. Frequently think about going back and revising it, but haven’t yet. BUT I DO REALLY LIKE THIS SPECIFIC PASSAGE

A favourite excerpt of your writing: 

THE SCENE AFTER THOMAS MAKES DICK KILL SCARECROW AND THEYRE BACK IN THE CAVE:

Dick slowly folds to his knees next to the computer. Thomas gazes down at him. Dick looks up. Onscreen is a description of the night as it happened in Thomas’s characteristic clipped, short sentences. The glow from the screen colors Thomas’s cheekbone angel-white. Next to the keyboard is a tray Alfred must have left, with sugarcubes, what smells like very strong peppermint tea, and neatly cut cucumber sandwiches. Thomas brings down a hand and brushes the back of his knuckles against Dick’s cheek. 

“I told you,” Thomas says quietly. “This doesn’t change anything.”

Dick turns his cheek away from Thomas’s hand. Instead, slowly, he presses his forehead against Thomas’s outer thigh, still plated with the Owlman suit. Thomas exhales sharply.

Thomas’s hand moves to the crown of Dick’s skull, where it applies almost possessive pressure, fingernails scraping against Dick’s scalp, even though Dick’s hair must make Thomas’s fingers wet. 

“I adore you,” Thomas says. 

Dick shudders.

How did you grow as a writer last year: I REALLY CUT DOWN ON A LOT OF MY PURPLE PROSE

How do you hope to grow this year: I WANT TO WRITE THINGS THAT ARE EXCITING AND LIKE FORCE ME TO MAKE JUMPS AND LEAVE THINGS OUT FOR THE READER TO HOTWIRE TOGETHER instead of me over explaining or lingering too long everything and undercutting the shortest point   

Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer, beta, cheerleader, etc.): EMMACORTANA MY BELOVED. Omg what a thing to be mutuals with one of your fandoms biggest writers and have them enact stunning hyperperceptive analyses of your work. She catches every single detail i cannot tell you how often i reread her notes. My hero mon ange whom i adore beyond measure 

Anything from your real life show up in your writing last year: Im sure lots and lots but nothing i can think of off of the top of my head. However the “Have I told you I love you yet today?” thing that Alfred says in a bunch of my work is from my mom saying that

Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: If what you want to write doesnt seem like it will have an audience and no one will want to read it but you REALLY love your idea, WRITE IT and do so with such like satisfaction and like dignity that you’re writing something truly a product of YOU and YOUR intuitions and knowledge and desires and thoughts, not just some burned-CD version of what you think some abstract Audience arbiter of popularity wants. Don’t even worry about things being popular. I know people say dont worry about that and then it is sad when your thing is unpopular or less popular and its like okay well. But its serious and its very important to not let people pick you up and move you from what you want. Do you know those people whose politics for example are just what will get them applause and what slogans they memorized from the Ideological Software Updates or whatever they can glean from çanva posts on  social media? Have you ever looked around and realized all of the people around you were saying exactly the same truisms you believed and thought were being especially Good and Clever for believing and they’re saying them all inelegantly and hamfistedly and for the wrong reasons like grievance and applause???? You HAVE to find it for yourself. That is a bad place to be—and that happens when you let yourself be moved too much. You have to not let yourself be moved except by you. You dont need to be on the cutting edge: You need to do you. Reinvent the wheel by all means if the wheel schematics are in your brain, or be a real true normie with the most basic aesthetic and media tests ever (I AM!!!!) but NEVER change your work and the sake of it being more popular. To make more $ sure, def change it, but for fun???? HAVE INTEGRITY WITH YOURSELF and what you want!! 15 kudos for something that is 100% truly yours what you wanted it to be is superior to 100 kudos for something that you compromised on even just 5% and buckled for bc then it’s something you don’t even want so like what was the point?

Any projects you’re looking to starting (or finishing) this year: 

i have this one medieval dc fic within the context of like william blakes mythopoesis that I’ve been TRYING TO GET OUT and i alsoI have this Azrael&Dick enemies-to-???? fic in my mind where there shall be a silly (in context it is supposed to b sad. But describing it, it is very silly) scene where JPV has like all these mini hard pretzels in a bag and drops the bag and then half are broken in half and so JPV spreads them all out on the countertop and is breaking the others in half because of like. i don’t want to diagnosticize here bc JPV has a Lot going on but like OCD-adjacent reasons and Dick comes in and sighs and then in total pure silence under the kitchen light in the middle of the night they sit across from each other and break the rest of the pretzels in perfect halves until the unbalancedness doesnt  bother JPV anymore and after that JPV is so totally touched by that act and he is so obsessed enamored with DG

[elusiveclownbox]

it’s honestly so funny to me, thinking back about how I originally got interested in bg3 due to astarion,,,and then I ended up restarting halfway through his romance because I fell more in love with gale💀 and then I found out the fandom calls gale ANNOYING

[vaguely-concerned]

what would I do without you. indeed illario.

lucanis trust me! indeed illario. the ea-nasir vibes on this shitty little rat of a man (somehow still slightly affectionate despite myself)

I am obsessed with WHERE this letter is found and what we're meant to read into those context clues. I don't have a handy save for this mission right now to double check the details, but from memory: It's the room across from what seems implied to be Caterina's room (Lucanis says these are the family quarters, so Illario has kept her locked in her own room all this time probably?? Oh oh house arrest, house arrest for grandmother for ten thousand years style)? We find the scraps of a letter from Zara to Illario, torn to pieces with one fragment still in the empty fireplace so presumably we're meant to assume he burned it, and this old letter from Illario to Lucanis lying neatly on a table. Whose room is this? Because here's a theory one could put together that has some real crazymaking potential for me specifically at least:

Considering that we're helpfully down to only three Dellamortes to account for, it's likely either Lucanis' or Illario's room. If I'm remembering right/let's for a moment assume that Caterina is being confined to her own rooms -- the fact that Lucanis is her favourite and also heir apparent I'd say tips the scales for me that it's likely she'd keep him closest, whenever he's home. Thus opening for the possibility that all this time Illario has been staying in the room of the cousin he murdered but as it turns out not hard enough that he didn't come back again like a haunting, reading his own old letters to him that Lucanis apparently kept all this time (!!! ow !!!), and sparing them from the spiteful fate he gave Zara's 'aww chin up you'll get 'em next time babe' one, right across the hall from where the grandmother he apparently can't bring himself to kill or seriously hurt even with everything else he's done is imprisoned and i n c r e d i b l y pissed off, if she gets out of there while he's sleeping or something he's fucked. Has he been sleeping in Lucanis' bed since kidnapping Caterina????? (did they ever share a bed, when they were children? for comfort if not ever out of real necessity?) is this some kind of incredibly fucked up way to try to be close to them both somehow even when he is the one who messed it all up to begin with? no matter what I have so many questions here what is WRONG with this family???????? (well I don't think we have time to get into all that right now that's a novel not a text post probably fhsdkj)