#I dunno... I'm really not a bad person lol
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ihopethisendswell · 6 months ago
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My bias is very much due to me reading the summary of fairy tales on Wikipedia, but I find myself constantly going " the audacity of men" when reading them, good lord.
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@amyslunaticasylum
I cannot emphasize enough that the stuff I end up saying on this blog is such a small portion of what my wife has to deal with me saying around the house. The fun part of being slightly psychotic (diagnosed) and also largely unable to think in your head is all the wild ass things you think usually just come out before you realize that you're vocalizing, and with a little bit of performance energy you can basically just convince everyone that you're just very interesting and fun to be around. Sometimes we'll be watching tv and wifey will comment on the characters and my response will be so deranged that she'll drag me on her twitter before god and everyone, and other times she's just like "no, you know what, i did know from the start that i was putting my strap in crazy when we met, i really can't blame anyone else for this" so that probably covers "unhinged"
As far as "kinda hot" goes, well.
There's a reason wifey has to be REMINDED not to stick her strap in crazy, and I have to assume it has something to do with the fact that my favorite game to play in bed is "how many times in a row can I make you come before you black out?"
Turns out the answer is "single digits".
I think it's very funny that my gender is "leather and topsoil" and my sexuality is "fuck me like you want me dead" and the outcome of this has been a littany of deeply toxic girlfriends, one boytoy who was unfortunately a very gentle lover, and my wife who likes to get facefucked while high.
Realistically, I can't be trusted to date, and it's probably a good thing I got wifey tied down when I did.
#depressingly gentle lover boy only made it to a 2count before he tapped out#did say that he 'saw the face of god' after tho so I didn't feel too bad about that#i have an oral fixation and express affection through sex#honestly it's mostly just surprising my body count hasn't surpassed 20 yet. i'm not especially restricted about who i fuck#at one point i think i was fucking 5 people simultaneously? that was a bit much even for me#but i'm usually pretty happy at 3#the trouble is that then i have 3 people who all want one on one time with me and I#i Do Not Want That#like i like spending time with my fwb don't get me wrong#but eventually everyone starts getting invested in life together and i just#i don't have that in me even when i want it#i am deeply incapable of patience for others not being upfront and proactive about their plans/relationships#and so far that hasn't been an easy thing to make compatible with others#i dunno i think ideally i would just fuck my friends and only really worry about wifey as a romantic partnership since that was agreed#that probably sounds unromantic and out of tune with my usual wifeguy behavior#it really isn't! i love my wife a lot#it's just that like. sexuality is weird and i am ultimately a very odd and intense person#i doubt many people would enjoy a romantic partnership with me#but wifey has always been a constant#and we're good for each other#so it works out#makes space for me to get into my fuck boi behavior elsewhere without as much desperation lol
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nc-vb · 2 years ago
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DONT FORGET ROT FOR THE MALE MOANING AUDIOS
My dear, I'm going to use this ask of yours as a catalyst... All of my personal favourite ASMRs, vids, etcetera... beneath the cut. Not all of them are only male moaning! Literally just all my faves I've collected LOL.
Links will not only be audios; a majority of them are videos.
Links will be from any of the following: Twitter, the Hub, Audiomack, Soundgasm, and likely other sites, so be prepared because they're not labeled, lol. And sorry if any of the links are repeated; my bad.
BUT YES, THE MALE MOANING AUDIOS UGH 😮‍💨
BLUE TEXT MEANS NEW LINKS HAVE BEEN ADDED.
Links with sparkles are my personal faves.
Edited, more added July 21, 2023
CerberosVA Now, if y'all like your man extremely vocal, if you like whimpering, or lowkey, you like the whole subby bf thing, PLEASE, THIS MAN, I cannot recommend his shit enough. He's on twt, the hub, probably the mack; please support his official work on Patreon, if you can.
x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x
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softxwarm (hub) This guy does both asmr and stuff with his girlfriend, but his solo ASMRs are pretty coo'. I'll just share my top three since you can just sift through his videos, anyway.
one (video; solo) | two (video; solo) | three (video; solo)
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moonxx911 (twt) ANYTHING by this man. I won't even both being specific; I listen to his shit on repeat, rotated.
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Akiradubs (hub) He mostly does character dub audios, but he has some simpler ones that I enjoy, like this one.
one (audio, gn!; sub male, ig?)
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RedactedASMR I haven't gotten so deep into the lore of it, but Redacted has a whole series of ASMRs that tell long ass stories, so if you have the time, I recommend searching him out. I believe most of them are on YouTube? Personally, Lasko is my favourite (he's so cute with the stuttering, ughhhh). I'm just going to link my personal Redacted playlist I've started, rather than link specific ones. You can find him on more platforms, but I don't think his n/sfw ASMRs are on Youtube... idk.
ncvb RedactedASMR playlist (the mack)
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SeikyuuVA (hub; also on the mack) Look, Seikyuu isn't everyone's flavour... there's only a couple specific ones I enjoy, just because he really goes over the top with the sounds and aggression sometimes, LMAO, and it gives me second hand embarrassment...
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Lxvesickk (twt) Just found him, hehe. Just listen…
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WickLuvsU (twt) His audios are... immaculate.
X | X (play these both at the same time... you're welcome.)
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Video Links, general
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 ✨ | 19 | 20
21 | 22 ✨ | 23 ✨ | 24 | 25 ✨ | 26 | 27 | 28 ✨ | 29 ✨| 30 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 ✨| 36 ✨| 37 | 38 | 39 ✨| 40 ✨
41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45 (mmf✨)| 46 (aud✨)|
Video Links, mlm
I had to put these links in a separate post because I reached Tumblr's 100 link-per-post limit? Didn't know that was a thing. So, please find them here! There's about 80+ links.
Video Links, wlw
1 | 2 | 3
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Characters Like, the fake dubs. I dunno what they're called.
Hanma Shuji (hub, audio; Akiradubs) Zhongli (hub, audio; Akiradubs) Akira/Joker (hub, audio; Seikyuu) Take this Audiomack link, too; it's my other personal playlist that has a shit ton of character ASMR dubs on it, and then some...
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I'll have more to add along the way; keep an eye on the update date!
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mypoisonedvine · 1 year ago
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another idea for dr crane but i'm afraid it might be too similar to thoughtless so please just ignore if it is!!: from personal experience, being a patient of his who is seeing him bc of sexual trauma. fear of penetration due to previous sexual assault. and ofc he's all about exposure therapy. and you wanna trust him so so bad bc he wants what's best for you, he's encouraging you ("you deserve to embrace your sexuality, you get past this one barrier and you're free"), but you start to fight back. and he takes personal offense bc he's your doctor, why don't you trust his expertise? but then it starts to feel good~
idk i picture reader trying with a toy in front of him but he gets impatient sees she's struggling with going that extra step further so he takes control either with the toy or himself.
warnings: not actually that dark (I mean, it is cause he's her therapist lol but he's not nonconning her) but still manipulation, slightly medical kink?, praise kink
(oops this turned out pretty long how did that happen? lmao)
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"Did you try what we discussed last week?" he asked, and you pressed your knees together as you looked down and shook your head. "Really? You seemed very positive about it before."
"I was," you admitted. "It seemed really easy-- just sort of training myself, you know. But then I got home and... I guess it was a little overwhelming."
"Hm," he said, and you started to feel guilty for disappointing him. "That's interesting-- it seems like you were more comfortable here than at home. I figured it would be the other way around."
"Yeah, that would make more sense, I guess," you shrugged, "but-- I dunno..."
"Do you want to try again?" he wondered.
"I do," you admitted, "but I'm nervous that I'll start panicking again..."
"Then why don't you try here?"
You tensed up at just the suggestion; "Wouldn't that be... I mean, isn't that...?"
"I'm a medical doctor," he reminded you with a chuckle, "I've seen much worse. This is simply part of your treatment. I want you to get better."
You took a deep breath, nodding. "Okay," you decided. "Okay, I can try it."
"Great," he smiled, uncrossing his legs and resetting his clipboard in his lap. "We agreed before that you'd be more comfortable with your fingers than silicone dilators, is that still--?"
"Yes," you interrupted, "definitely. Feels too... clinical, otherwise."
He nodded, and there was a brief silence.
"So, do I just... start?"
"I'd like you to try," he said gently.
You noticed that his gaze never broke away from you, but you looked down into your lap as you started to slowly spread your legs. "So I just.. reach under my dress?"
"That should be fine," he encouraged. "There's nothing to be afraid of-- this is a safe space."
You nodded in agreement, pulling up your dress enough to reach into your panties. Sighing, you tried not to let nerves get the better of you as you pushed your lips apart with your fingers. But still, the anxiety was bubbling up, and you pressed the tip of your finger to your hole only to feel resistance alongside your distress. "I-- I don't think I can--"
"It's alright," he soothed, "start with the outside first-- stimulate your clitoris."
You choked on a laugh, still too nervous to look at him. "You really are a medical doctor..."
"What, too formal?" he chuckled. "Alright... rub your clit."
That shocked you even more than the clinical language; but it made you pulse inside, too. "O-okay..."
You pressed your fingers against the bud, trying to rub it, but it didn't really feel like anything-- like rubbing your elbow or something. Jonathan corrected you right away: "Not so hard," he said, "start gently."
"Sorry," you breathed, shutting your eyes.
"No-- it's fine," he assured, "I just want to help."
He was right, though; when you lessened the pressure and gently rubbed in circles, it started to feel good-- slowly, but surely. When your next breath came out shaky, you heard him hum with satisfaction.
"Is that better?" he asked.
"Yes," you answered, but you didn't mean for it to be a moan.
"I think you're ready," he informed you-- and something about his voice, it was lower than before, it was different... it was making you wet.
"Ready... for what?" you whispered, daring to open your eyes and see the darkness in his expression as he watched you.
"Ready to fuck yourself with your fingers."
"Oh," you sighed, feeling like you'd been punched in the gut-- in the best possible way. "Okay..."
"Just one to start," he encouraged, "put a finger inside yourself, nice and slow."
You sighed as you pressed the finger up to your hole again, smiling as you realized it was more open-- and wet-- than before. You gently pressed in further, finding some pressure but pushing through it until you were knuckle deep in yourself. You smiled happily; "I did it," you breathed, "oh my god, I-- I never thought I'd--"
"Don't stop," he cooed, "move it back and forth. If you do well enough, you can add a second finger."
You figured he meant it that you would be able to add a second finger, but it almost sounded like a bargain, like a reward. Do what I say and I'll let you add a second, or something. Surely that wasn't what he meant.
"A little faster," he encouraged as you pumped the finger. "That's it, very good."
You whimpered, biting down on your lip to hide your moan. You wanted him to say that again, to tell you that you were doing this correctly.
"Add the second now," he instructed, his own voice suddenly sounding a little hoarse and needy. "Stretch yourself out-- and tell me how it feels."
"It feels good," you panted as you started to add your second finger, whining at the stretch. "Fuck, I-- will they both fit?"
He chuckled a little-- a low, rough sound-- and promised you: "Yes, they'll fit. You can take a lot more than two fingers, with some patience."
You hadn't even imagined being able to do more than this-- for years, you hadn't been able to put anything inside you, and now here you were... fingering yourself in front of your therapist. "How much more?" you wondered, hardly imagining how it could be possible.
There was a long, long pause; you worried he hadn't heard you. Looking at him again, you found him watching with a tight jaw.
"How much more can I take, Dr. Crane?" you asked again.
"You can take anything I give you," he answered tensely.
A shiver ran up your spine; "F-fuck," you whimpered, and your walls pulsed around your fingers.
"You're going to come, aren't you?" he noticed, and you nodded. "Good."
You gasped.
"Very good," he egged you on, seeing the effect it had on you; your head tilted back as you pushed your fingers into yourself faster. "You're doing very well for me-- now I just need to see you come. I just need you to make yourself come."
"Yes, yes," you chanted, hips rocking, moans growing louder. "It feels good-- fuck, Doctor, I--"
"I know," he soothed, "just let it happen. Keep going. Come for me."
It hit you all at once, a heavy and numbing feeling that left you shaking on his couch; he purred out his praises, telling you how good you were doing, and it only made the feeling stronger.
When you exhausted yourself, you stilled; there was a moment of silence, just your panting filling the air, until you found the strength to meet his gaze again. He was smiling at you sweetly, looking oddly similar to how he always did at the end of a session. "That was incredible progress," he said proudly. "You should be very impressed with yourself."
You sighed as you nervously pulled your fingers out of yourself. "I-- do you have a tissue I can wipe these with?" you asked nervously.
"No need," he said, "you should taste it."
"Wh-what?" you choked out, your face even warmer than before.
"Just taste it-- I think you'll like it," he encouraged.
Though you hesitated for a second, you brought your wet fingers to your lips and gently licked off some of the sticky substance left behind.
"What do you think?" he asked.
"It's sort of strange," you admitted.
"It's an acquired taste," he shrugged, making your heart pound as you realized just from the look in his eyes that this was absolutely a taste he'd acquired... then again, there must have been a reason that he knew even better than you how to touch yourself and make you come.
Then, it was impossible not to imagine what he's like when he does this off the clock-- the way he touches and pleasures the women he takes to bed. You imagined him with his fingers inside lace panties, whispering in her ear about how good she was being for him; you imagined him pushing two inside and promising to give her more; you imagined him making her come, over and over, until he's satisfied and brings those soaked fingers to his lips and calling her delicious.
And even though you tried not to picture who that woman would be, you couldn't help but wonder if he'd like a woman like you... if you were the type he'd do that to, if you weren't his patient.
"Thank you," you blurted out. "I never thought I'd be able to... thank you. It's been a long time since I was able to feel that."
He nodded. "Thank you for trusting me," he replied. Glancing at the clock, he sighed a little through a polite smile: "Oh, look at that, we're out of time for today. This has been a really excellent session."
"Yeah," you agreed as you both stood up, "definitely."
"And next week, we can discuss the next steps in your recovery."
You raised your eyebrows when you heard that, already almost halfway out of the office. "Next steps?" you noticed.
"Yes," he agreed, "you made great progress, but there's still so much more for you to learn."
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kozachenko · 5 months ago
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Don't really have much to post again aside from some more sketching that I've done recently, this time of Reimu and Marisa, mainly because I just need a starting point as to how I would go about drawing them in my style (which is why the poses are so boring lol).
Artist's Notes;
So I mentioned in the last post how I've been wanting to experiment with how I wanted to draw Reimu, and I then got an idea for Marisa. So I wanted to try and contrast the two of them with each other via their shape language and body types. For scale I also put some numbers on the side just as a visualizing aid so I can imagine them easier. I wanted to make Reimu very tall and lanky and Marisa to be short and rounder. Also, this provides some interesting contrast in their shape language, and Marisa ends up being more round and Reimu ends up feeling more sharp.
I think what I'm most worried about is mainly that I don't 100% know if these two drawings still...feel like Reimu and Marisa. MMaybe because I made so many changes to both of them, but I feel like it's mostly in their faces. I kept the little personal touches that would add when I would draw them in the past (i.e. Reimu's tiny eyebrows and Marisa's freckles) but I dunno, maybe it's in the eyes? Like, Marisa's bigger eyes and eyebrows are definitley ideas that I want to play with in the future, but Reimu.... I dunno, I like the idea of her face shape in this drawing specifically, and I defnitely feel like I got closer to the monilid eye look I was trying to achieve in my previous attempt at drawing her eyes, but something still feels off with her.
When I drew Marisa, I really wanted to explore some other ideas for her body type, mainly in contrast to Reimu, so I wanted to give her a fuller figure and make her shorter than Reimu. I do feel like her eyes could be a bit sharper as eyes look maybe a little too innocent for Marisa, but I do still want to use these eyes I drew for her as a springboard for later attempts. I made some adjustments to her dress so that they would look good on the body type I gave her. I also need to draw shoes more because those boots....I just, I don't even know, I probably just need to draw that specific body type more wearing those types of boots or find references because I am not happy with how they turned out. Out of the two of them, Marisa was definitely my favourite to draw. I really enjoying drawing different body types when I get the chance to, and I feel like it's important to try your best to expand your variety when it comes to drawing the human body, I'm glad that I'm comfortable with drawing different body types. I do still have a long ways to go with this as I just need to do it more often and still need to do this but with different body shapes and weights and how to combine those two aspects to create unique body types and silhouettes. Also, please feel free to give me any critiques to how these two designs turned out, I remember that I drew Reimu when it was late at night and spent the entire day on Marisa so I defnitely feel like there's some things to critque here.
I'll be honest... I don't really like how Reimu turned out too much. Not to say it's a bad drawing, but I dunno. I think I just need to draw Reimu more, but she's honestly the hardest character to translate into my style. The thing is, I have an idea for her in my head but I just have a hard time putting it to paper. It's not like I've never drawn her before, in fact, aside from the height I really like how she looked in this piece of fanart (why tf did I make her so short in that piece) I did a while back despite the fact that I've imrpoved on my faces a lot since then (again, I do want to try my lineless style again, I just need to find the chance to do so), maybe because that was the drawing that provided me with some of my ideas on how to draw Reimu in my style? I do think I'm definitely in the rut of the "not knowing how to draw a character's face in your style" phase that I'm sure many fan-artists go through, so with enough drawings I'll get through it eventually, just gotta suffer through several more hours of trial and error though so yipeeeeeeee... As for things I do like, Reimu's hair turned out nicely. I did my usual technique for drawing Reimu's hair and then pasted the lineart layer underneath the main lineart layer and changed the colour to give it some extra pizzaz, and I do like how Reimu and Marisa contrast each other a lot. I just need to find a way to make them feel more like themselves while still taking liberties with their designs in my style.
Even if these are just sketches and me laying the groundwork for how I want to draw these two in the future, I still want to improve how I draw them a lot (also I don't like how much these two look like teenagers, I see both of them as being in their late 20s-early 30s and it just doesn't read like that and I definitely need to do more studies in the future to get them right in my style).
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twost3ps · 7 months ago
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Since ya doing au and made Emily Michael and Adam's daughter what about an au where Charlie is Lucifer and Adam's daughter just curious how that would come out of your artistic mind. Love ur art is PEAK bro
AWWW thank you so much!!!! AUSGEHYSGEUSGSUWBSBS
But totes I’ve had thought of this b4. Thank you for giving this prompt so I had an excuse to draw and write it out!!!
An au where Adam and Lucifer are Charlie’s dad… umm well there are a couple of ways this could go….
But the first that comes to mind is the one where Adam falls with Lucifer and they have Charlie. Idk if either Lucifer seahorses it and has the baby or if Adam is the one that carries. Idk first man sure, but yk maybe god was like: hey idk what genitals to slap on this guy so let’s do both and gave him both. When Lilith’s gender was determined, it was a flip of a coin. Adam could have just been the mother if it landed on the other side lol. Or maybe if he falls, god strips him of his title as a man, like Lilith, and swaps his genitals. So basically intersex Adam.
Either way, silly girl Charlie, here ya go! (I don't draw her enough)
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Even as Adam's kid, I don't actually think Charlie changes all that much. Personality wise, at least. She is very much like her dad lucifur- a silly lovable dreamer- but some of Adam still leaks through, obviously. She's definitely a mommy's girl, and in this case, I'd like to think Adam is the mom figure. So instead of taking liliths more regal and more elegant choices of fashion and way of goinh, she takes on more of a punk and grunge look with a mix of her original style and a bit more agression.
For her looks I think she'd have dirty blonde hair and it would be short (it's my preference, lol), and her clothes are a bit more... punk? She dresses much more losely imo , def because of Adam. She keeps her horns out for the fun of it and her emo face still kinda stays with her, especially after Adam praising her for her look when she was in that phase. She does some sick eyeliner and eyshadow. She HAS to play an instrument so she knows the bass and strangly enough the keytar. I also think she's a bit chubbier because she maybe shared her dad's appetite idk.
But overall, she is still a sweet girl with a dream to help sinners. She's just way more assertive and quick tempered.
I won't lie, I got inspired by one of my friends' relationships with her dad and both lovingly insult each other to death. They talk about how much they "hate" eachother, but everyone clearly understands that both would die for one another for sure, especially Adam.
He may say something like. "Oh Charlie? Yeah if it were up to me I'd sell her for a new guitar" right infront of her but she's laughing so hard as Adam holds her close in a side hug because she knows he's joking.
Idk how to explain it but ifkyk, they lovingly talk bad about eachother but somehow it makes you understand that they really do love eachother as parent and child.
As for Adam and Lucifurs relationship, I genuinely dunno. I kinda want them to be a bit strained because even after the fall, Adam is still loyal to heaven. He's not lilith, who wants freedom - Adam likes security, and even if rule under heaven is restrictive, atleast hes safe. Charlie, to Adam, is one of the only good things that ever came out of the fall, and he would fall again and again just so she could be his. Like Lilith, Charlie is mainly parented by Adam, but it's because Charlie was the only shining light Adam had down in hell. Overtime Adam and Lucifur possibly heal and truly get together, but when Charlie was really young, they were not an item at all.
Then there are other options of Charlie being Lucifur and Adam's baby-
Charlie is born under an angel Adam and fallen lucifur and Adam decides to take Charlie and raise her in heaven
Adam is in no way related to Charlie, but one way or meets her and kinda just adopts her. Lucifur doesn't know why but Adam stakes claim ig
There are more potential ones but I'm not really a writer or an idea maker lol. IM NOT THAT CREATINVE SJVDEHBSBS But I think that this is just a great concept lolol a bit harder to work with than the secret royal family stuff but still fun to think about overall
I might come back to this one day o3o
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ak319 · 5 days ago
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Haii!, I really like your Arthur Morgan series and I've also read it several times and it's not boring at all!🫶🏻
Can I make a request? If so, can you make the reader jealous because Arthur is close to Mary Beth?🫶🏻 (Arthur and the reader's relationship is not platonic!)
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(AN: Tsym! Remind me why we making Y/n suffer again? PS: I'm terrible at writing jealousy shit ngl and I legit dunno why. AND THATS LIT WHAT YALL KEPT ASKING FOR-😭☠) Hope yall enjoy reading lol)
Warnings/MDNI: None, just angst and then fluff to soothe your asses-
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You were by the lake, lazily washing clothes. The day had you feeling sluggish, and the pleasant weather didn’t exactly help motivate you. The water was just the right temperature, cool enough to refresh but warm enough to keep you rooted in place. You should really pick up the pace, finish up, and grab some tea--or coffee--or a well-deserved break.
The faint hum of camp activity behind you was oddly comforting, a soothing backdrop to your thoughts. That is until you heard footsteps crunching on the gravel, quick and impatient, followed by a sharp curse.
“Dammit! I’ve been lookin’ everywhere for you, girl.”
You glanced over your shoulder, grinning as Molly stormed up to you, her face a mix of exasperation and something else you couldn’t quite place.
“For God’s sake, Molly, you know my Tuesday routine by now,” you teased, tossing a wet shirt into the basket beside you. “It’s not like this camp is big enough to lose someone. Honestly, I think you’re just bad at looking.”
She didn’t laugh. Not even a crack of a smile. Instead, she stood there, arms crossed, her expression tight with barely-contained frustration. You paused mid-scrub, a curious eyebrow raised.
“What’s gotten into you? You look ready to murder someone.”
“Oh, sure,” she snapped, voice dripping with sarcasm. “Leave it to ever-so-clueless (Y/N) to not notice a damn thing going on around her.” She gestured wildly toward the camp as though you were missing some grand spectacle.
You blinked, thoroughly confused. “What the hell are you on about?”
Her eyes narrowed, and for a moment, she hesitated as if debating whether you were even worth the explanation. Then, with a dramatic huff, she took a step closer, glaring down at you like you’d personally wronged her.
“Let me spell it out for you. Do I even bother tellin’ you what’s happening? Or should I just assume it won’t make a difference because your ‘dearest cold heart’ won’t care? Or worse, you’ll just laugh it off like you always do!”
Your hands stilled in the water, the soap slipping through your fingers. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
"Y’know, what I just heard and saw?” Molly huffed, throwing her hands in the air for emphasis. “Mr. Arthur Morgan, having a chat with Mary-Beth. Mary-Beth! That same snake who’s all over Dutch, and now, apparently, your man, (Y/N)!”
Her voice rose with each word, and you blinked, caught completely off guard. She leaned in, her eyes narrowing as if trying to gauge your reaction. “I swear to God, she was asking him to buy her another one of those silly romance books for her lovesick brain. I mean, why Arthur, huh? Why doesn’t she go pester Kieran’s ass instead?”
Hearing her rant, you stood up, gripping the damp shirt in your hands as you processed her words. “Wh--sounds like a friendly chat to me, Molly,” you said, trying to brush it off with a shrug. “I mean, Arthur brings stuff for everyone. He goes out the most, doesn’t he? And, well, Kieran… he’s not exactly allowed far from camp neither he can afford anything right now. They still don’t trust him, y’know. And Arthur, he’s like a brother to Mary-Beth-"
“Don’t even start with that ‘brother’ shit, (Y/N),” Molly snapped, cutting you off. “It's just a facade.”
Your mouth fell open, heat rushing to your face at the implication. Uncertainty clawed at your chest as you tried to stammer a response, but she wasn’t done. Molly’s jealousy toward Mary Beth only seemed to fuel her fire, her words coming quicker now, sharp and biting.
“And don’t act like it couldn’t happen. You think she doesn’t see how kind he is to you? How he looks at you when he thinks no one’s watching? Oh, she sees it. And she’d snatch him up the moment she gets the chance.”
You clenched your jaw, her words making you shift uncomfortably. Sure, you trusted Arthur, but the venom in Molly’s tone, the way her words seemed to twist around your insecurities, left you feeling just the slightest bit unsteady.
"Did he even say goodbye to you before he sprang into action?” Molly pressed, her voice softer now, almost pitying. “And the other day, weren’t you telling me you needed some cream for your hands? You even told him, and look, just look at your hands.”
Her gaze dropped to your chapped and reddened fingers, and you instinctively tried to wipe them dry on your skirt, as if that would somehow make them better. Her words were digging deeper now, clawing at something vulnerable in you. Did he forget to bring it? Or worse, did he not care enough to remember? Had your wishes, his woman’s wishes, stopped mattering to him altogether?
“This is bullshit, you should have run away with that pen pal of yours, to be honest when you had the chance,” Molly muttered, crossing her arms. “You didn’t listen to me when I told you she’s after Dutch. And now she’s after both! I swear, those books she reads must be teaching her these tactics. Manipulative little-"
“I--y’know what?” you cut her off, your voice suddenly firm as your gaze drifted to the camp, your eyes narrowing.
“What?” Molly asked, surprised by your sudden shift in tone.
“Let’s just go,” you said, your voice laced with resolve.
“Go where?”
“Town.”
Without waiting for her to argue, you kicked the bucket of soapy water, sending it tumbling into the river, the suds spilling out and disappearing downstream. The laundry lay abandoned on the grass as you turned and marched toward the stables, Molly following close behind.
Damn everyone, then.
❀˖°
Arthur returned to camp, expecting to find you in his tent as usual. But when he stepped inside, the familiar space felt oddly empty. A frown tugged at his lips.
"Hey... um, Sadie?" he called out, spotting her near the campfire. "You seen (Y/N)?"
Sadie glanced up from sharpening her knife. "Oh, yeah. She and Molly went to town."
"What?!" The word escaped him before he could stop it, his voice louder than he intended. Clearing his throat, he muttered a quick, “Thanks,” and walked back to his tent, feeling heat rise to his face. He slumped down onto his cot with a heavy sigh, running a hand through his hair.
You know how he felt about you going far from camp without him, even if you were with one of the girls. It wasn’t a matter of trust, it was fear.
And still you did.
There were too many dangers out there, too many things that could go wrong, and the thought of you out there without him stirred a storm in his chest.
It was 5 p.m., the time when you two usually sat together to talk about your day over supper. The time he looked forward to most whenever he was at camp. And now? He sat there, staring at the flap of his tent, the minutes ticking by painfully slow.
But what bothered him more was why you’d gone. And with Molly, of all people. It wasn’t that he didn’t like her, he didn’t have a problem with her, not really. But something about the way you two were together always set him on edge.
He’d told you how he felt about it once. About how Molly seemed to lean on you a little too much, how her sadness and drama sometimes seemed to pull you down with her. But of course, you’d defended her, saying you couldn’t just turn your back on your best friend. That Molly found her only comfort in your company.
And you were right. He knew you were. But that didn’t make it any easier to sit here, waiting, imagining where you were and what could happen.
Arthur let out a frustrated sigh, his appetite gone. Instead of heading to the campfire for supper, he threw himself onto his cot, pulling his hat over his face in an attempt to block out the growing worry gnawing at his chest.
But even with his eyes closed, he couldn’t shake the unease. Images of you and Molly wandering through town, far from the safety of camp, flickered in his mind. He trusted you, of course, but the world out there? That was another story entirely.
“Damn woman never listens to me,” he muttered under his breath, his voice tinged with equal parts frustration and concern.
Sleep didn’t come easily, and even as he tried to rest, he knew one thing for certain, when you came back, this was a conversation he wasn’t going to let slide.
❀˖°
Arthur woke with a start, roused by Bill’s loud guffaw somewhere in the camp. With a groan, he rubbed his face, taking a moment to shake off the haze of sleep and piece together his scattered thoughts. Then it hit him, the memory of you leaving with Molly, and the worry twisted sharply in his chest again.
He pushed himself up with a sigh, his body stiff from the restless nap. Moving through camp, he glanced around, hoping, praying, to catch sight of you. But there was nothing. No sign of you or Molly.
He considered asking Dutch, but dismissed the thought just as quickly. Dutch would likely know even less than he did, and Arthur wasn’t in the mood for meaningless chatter.
Back at his tent, he sat on the edge of his cot, pulling out his journal in an attempt to distract himself. The flap of the tent was open, giving him a clear view of camp, but his eyes kept flickering toward it, waiting for you to appear.
His stomach growled, but he ignored it. He wasn’t going to eat, not until you came back, served the meal, and sat down beside him. That was how it went. That was how it had to go.
He was about to get up and go to find both of you himself when-
"Um, Arthur?" Abigail’s voice broke through his brooding. She appeared by the flap of his tent, holding a coffee pot. "There’s some coffee left, and I’ve got to wash the pot, would you like a cup?"
He shook his head, barely sparing her a glance. "Why’d they go to town?"
"Molly and (Y/N)?" Abigail tilted her head, her tone casual. "Oh, they’ve been back. Got back about half an hour ago. They’re in my tent, just hanging out."
Arthur blinked, first in shock, then confusion, which quickly morphed into anger. Half an hour? You’d been back for that long and hadn’t even bothered to come see him? Not even a word after being gone all day?
He shut his journal with a snap, the sound echoing his rising temper, and stood. The muffled chatter coming from Abigail’s tent grated on his nerves as he stalked toward it, each step heavier than the last.
What the hell was going on with you?
He cleared his throat outside the tent before pushing the flap open, only to find you and Molly sitting cross-legged, enjoying supper.
"Where were you? I was waiting for you."
You swallowed your bite, not bothering to look up at him. "Needed a few important things from town, actually, so I had to go."
Arthur’s jaw tightened. "Can you come with me? I want to talk."
"I’m already talking to Molly," you replied, your tone curt, still avoiding his gaze.
Damn it. Why the hell weren’t you even looking at him? That gnawing frustration in his chest boiled over. He had enough of this.
"I said, Come. With. Me." he demanded, his voice low but firm, the tone sharper than he intended.
Your head snapped up, eyes glaring at him with such intensity that, for a moment, he regretted using that tone. Hell, he’d be lying if he said it didn’t scare him just a little.
"Oh, excuse me, Mister. Don’t you dare order me around like a maid, alright? I sit, talk, and walk when I want to. And right now? I don’t want to. Now go away, we’re busy."
Arthur ignored Molly’s taunting scoff, still fixated on you. Something about this--about you--just didn’t sit right.
"I’m sorry, okay? I’m just hungry. I was waiting for you... Can we eat now?" Arthur’s chest tightened, guilt creeping in. He rubbed the back of his neck, his anger softening. "...I was just worried as hell."
Hell, I still am.
But you didn’t let it go. "I’ve already eaten, and I didn’t ask you to wait for me. There are plenty of people around here you can share your meal with, Arthur. Plenty."
You turned your attention back to Molly, flashing her a rueful grin with your hair covering your face but he definitely caught it.
The Irishwoman gave you a knowing smile, her voice full of mischief. "Oh, girl, there’s always someone around."
This is how it's gonna be huh?
His first instinct was to walk away, but no. Arthur wasn’t the type to run from problems. With one swift movement, he grabbed your arm and dragged you out and behind the tent, just past the tree line. He stared down at you, his expression a mix of annoyance and desperation.
"What the hell is that all about?! And you know I hate it when you go out alone-"
"I don’t care! I don’t care anymore!" you snapped, your voice shaking with anger. "I hate going out for some petty stuff too, which, by the way, I clearly asked you to get, and you forgot! I guess books are more important than me, huh?."
Arthur’s chest tightened. He rarely saw this side of you ever since you both got together, the frustration, the hurt, the coldness. "See, this is the problem," you continued, your voice rising. "When men find someone vulnerable enough to control, to fix, they get bored. Then they move on, find someone else to repeat the same damn cycle. Am I right?"
His mouth went dry. The words cut deep. But what hurt him the most was the thought that maybe... maybe you believed that.
He wasn’t asking for much, was he? Three meals with you, a cup of coffee, that was it. Simple things that made him feel like you cared. That made him feel loved. But you didn’t... or did you?
The silence between you two was deafening as he tried to process what you said.
"What are you talking about?" Arthur started, his frustration mounting. "See, this is why I don’t like when you and Molly-"
"Oh, no, no, no. Shush. Don’t you dare," you interrupted, your voice sharp, but there was a deep hurt behind it. "She’s always been right, Arthur. I was the dumb one. I’ve been working my ass off for you, and you didn’t even bother to say goodbye this morning, huh?"
Arthur froze, guilt beginning to gnaw at him. He wasn’t ready for this. "You know, I had a chance to leave this life, you know exactly who I’m talking about. But I didn’t. I chose you. But if I’m just gonna be sidelined like this? Nuh-uh. My ego doesn’t allow it. Nobody gets to disrespect me like that."
You took a deep breath, eyes blazing. "If you don’t want me anymore, then say it. Don’t play these stupid-ass games with me. I’m not Molly, not when it comes to this."
Arthur’s stomach dropped as the weight of your words settled in. He could feel the hurt radiating off of you, the betrayal that had built up. And now it made sense. Molly had probably warned you, just like she always did. He could almost hear her saying it a dozen times in the morning,
'Don’t let him treat you like that, they are all shit.'
"There is NOTHING like that, woman!" Arthur snapped, his voice rising in frustration. "Is that what this is about? You’re ready to just forget, hell, even think like this over a misunderstanding?"
"Call it whatever you want," you replied coldly, not backing down. "But not gonna lie, the pattern makes sense now, Arthur."
He took a step back, trying to steady his breath, forcing himself to calm down. "Don’t say that... c’mon. You know it’s not true! She’s like a sister to me! For God’s sake, how can you even think--"
Without another word, you grabbed his satchel, the leather creaking in your grip, and flipped it upside down. A book slid out and thudded onto the ground.
Arthur froze, his eyes darting to the book, then to the scattered contents of his bag. He watched, his heart sinking, as you threw the satchel aside in disgust. "Bravo," you muttered, the bitterness in your voice sharper than a knife.
"Don't even bother explaining. I’m tired." You began to walk away, but before you could get far, Arthur grabbed your wrist.
"Don't you dare, no way you’re... sleeping away from me." His voice started strong, then faltered into a desperate plea, but you didn’t turn around. With a sharp jerk, you freed your hand from his grasp and continued walking.
Arthur stood there for a moment, his breath heavy as he watched you leave. With a defeated sigh, he bent down to gather the scattered contents of his satchel. Tilly approached, offering to help, but he shrugged her off with a tired wave and handed the book over to Mary-Beth, who was standing a few feet away, her face filled with guilt and sadness. His hand lingered in his pocket for a moment, pulling out the cream he had meant to bring you, adding it to the pile with a sharp scoff.
His posture was slumped, his movements slow and burdened. He didn’t need to say anything, his body language alone was enough to tell Tilly, Mary-Beth, and anyone else watching that this sulking would last for days, and you... you weren’t someone who accepted apologies easily.
❀˖°
And that’s exactly what happened. Arthur waited every day, hoping you would just come, sit with him, and listen. He longed for you to let him explain, to sort things out, so he could hold you in his arms again. Dammit. He missed you at night like a child misses their favorite doll.
But you weren’t just any doll.
You were his doll.
And when it came to you, he was nothing but a man-child.
Everybody knew his routine, the gang enforcer's routine. Simple, predictable. Come back, chat a little, handle his business, talk and eat with you, then the tent flaps closed, just the two of you, a world away from the chaos of the camp.
But now?
Come back, brood in one corner, pace to another, sleep with the flaps wide open.
Arthur’s mood soured every time he saw you doing something that wasn’t just being with him. Chores, errands, anything that took you away, even for a moment, made him restless, agitated. He needed you with him, in the tent, with the flaps closed, where he could hold you, even if it was just in the silence of the night.
Every night, he asked you to come with him. But you ignored him. Yet, he kept asking, unable to stop the desperate hope that you’d return, that you’d see it the way he did.
"Damnit. Damn stubborn ass woman." He grumbled for what? The millionth time? Sighing he petted his horse as it trotted at a leisurely pace, just a few meters from camp. How the hell had it all gone so bad? What was even the point anymore? Are you happy now?
His horse huffed as if sensing his despair, nudging him gently, but Arthur barely acknowledged it. The familiar sound of the camp in the distance only served to remind him that nothing was the same anymore, not the meals, not the quiet talks, and certainly not the comfort of his cot. That's it. This ends tonight.
He is going to carry you over his shoulder if that takes you to talk to him. To hell with your protests and stubbornness.
You were crouched down, sorting through vegetables with Abigail, your hands busy with the task at hand.
It wasn’t long before you saw Molly moving quietly, eyes darting back and forth, heading toward the girls' area.
You knew Molly. You had spent enough time with her to understand that when her instincts kicked in, she often acted before she thought. There was an impulsive streak in her, a tendency to let her emotions guide her steps, and that could be dangerous. Especially now, when tensions were already high.
Without much thought, you excused yourself from Abigail, your voice quick and unsteady. “I’ll be right back.”
You left her with the vegetables and slipped away from the campfire, your steps light as you tried to stay out of sight. Moving quietly, you found a small, hidden spot behind a tent, where you could just make out the faint sounds of voices, though you couldn’t yet hear clearly what was being said. Your heart pounded in your chest.
"(Y/N) and I were so close, in fact, like sisters, but you ruined that too! I don’t know what you told her-" Mary-Beth’s voice cracked, and for the first time, it wasn’t the usual calm, polite tone she carried. There was raw emotion, maybe even a hint of fear, but more than that, it sounded like heartbreak.
"You did it! Just like you're trying to ruin my relationship with Dutch."
"Are you in your senses, Ms. Molly?!" Mary-Beth gasped, trying to defend herself. "How can you even think that?!"
The past few days, you couldn’t help but notice her glances at you, brief but meaningful. It was as if she was caught between wanting to reach out and not knowing if you’d welcome her presence. Her eyes would meet yours across the camp, filled with a mixture of concern and hesitation, as if she longed to approach, to console you, but the fear of intruding, of making things worse, kept her frozen in place.
You understood her hesitation. She was a kind soul, someone who cared deeply for those she loved, and in these tense moments, you knew she wasn’t sure how to navigate the space between you both. And neither did you try to clear the air.
"You and your pretty face are going to be your downfa-"
"Molly, enough." You stepped in, your voice firm. Molly turned to you, arms crossed over her chest, her face filled with frustration.
"(Y/N), don’t tell me you’re under her spell too, for God’s sake. She needs to get a reality check-"
"Molly," you interjected, stepping forward and gently taking hold of her arms. You guided her a few steps away from Mary-Beth, the tension between them thick. "Let me handle it, alright?"
"Don’t pity her, let me make that clear. Otherwise, you’ll be the one regretting it." Molly threw one last angry glance at Mary-Beth, shaking her head before storming off, muttering under her breath.
You stood there, a heavy sigh escaping you as you rubbed your forehead, watching Molly retreat. Turning back to Mary-Beth, who sat on the ground, you softened your expression. "I apologize on her behalf..." You couldn’t help but feel the weight of the situation. You knew you’d have to work hard to get Molly to let go of her anger, but that's for later.
"It's... alright, (Y/N)." Her voice croaked, and you didn’t miss the tremble in it, nor the quiet tears she tried to hide. Your gaze shifted to the book resting on the makeshift table in the corner. The one she had requested. You swallowed hard, a knot forming in your throat.
"You’re not reading it?" you asked, your voice gentle.
She looked up at you, shaking her head slowly. You could see the weight of her emotions pressing down on her, and it hurt to see her like this.
You walked over, picked up the book, and sat beside her. "Why not?" you asked softly. It caught her off guard, and for a moment, her eyes softened. She hesitated before returning the smile, albeit faintly, her sadness still lingering behind it.
"I am sorry... (Y/N), if you... if you misunderstood my actions, but I swear it’s nothing. There’s nobody else, except Mr. Morgan that we feel comfortable enough to ask for things... but if you mind it, then we won’t--"
"No. No. You can ask without hesitation, and I am sorry. I was quick to jump to... conclusions," you interrupted, your voice soft with regret. You hugged her, and she gladly returned the embrace. The warmth of her arms around you soothed the tension in your chest.
You placed the book gently in her lap and shifted your body closer, not wanting to break the moment. "I just... y'know... when I love someone, I do it fully. And I don’t tolerate when that gets disrespected, y'know? That’s one thing I will never forgive." Your voice trembled slightly, the depth of your feelings evident. "But anyway, do read it, and then we’ll have a chat about it. You know I love hearing you yap about your books more than reading them myself."
She chuckled softly, her eyes lighting up with a glimmer of her old self, and you watched her face brighten as she held the book. You stood up, feeling a sense of relief, but also a lingering desire to stay.
"Definitely. But for now, I must go work too, don’t want Susan to bury me alive."
"You better." As you were making your way back to the kitchen wagon, a figure stepped in your way.
"Am I forgiven too?" His voice was teasing, but his expression was genuine. You deadpanned, folding your arms.
"Ummmm... let me think about it," you replied with a mock thoughtful expression, your gaze narrowing slightly.
He mirrored your posture, folding his arms with a smirk. "Not fair, woman. Not fair."
"I never said I was." You gave him a pointed look before turning to walk past him.
As you continued your walk back to the kitchen wagon, you felt a lightness in the air, a shift that felt... right. Arthur, still a few steps behind you, watched you quietly with an almost childish pout. There was something about the way his gaze lingered on you that told you he was waiting, waiting for you to acknowledge it all, to say what neither of you had dared to say yet.
You stopped for a moment, as you placed the cutting board, and turned to face him. The sunlight caught the edges of his hair, giving him a softer, not to mention the dark circles, giving him a more vulnerable look than you’d seen before. There was no teasing now, no masks, just Arthur, looking at you like he was seeing you for the first time again.
"I’m sorry, too," you said softly, your voice almost a whisper. "For the things I said."
He took a step closer, his eyes never leaving yours. "I don’t like it either. I swear, I’d rather fight a hundred men than have you angry at me. But..." His hand reached out hesitantly, as though unsure whether he had the right to touch you, to pull you close. "I don’t know what I’d do without you. And I apologize too...for making you feel that way. But I swear it wasn't in my intention."
A warmth spread through your chest at his words. It wasn’t the grand gestures or flowery promises that touched you. It was the simplicity of it, the honesty in his voice, the vulnerability he rarely let show. "Well then let me tell you that," you whispered back, a soft smile tugging at your lips. "I’m not going anywhere."
With a relieved exhale, Arthur stepped forward, his arms wrapping around you firmly, pulling you into his chest. It was as though all the tension from before melted away, and in its place, there was just the comforting rhythm of his heartbeat against yours. "I love you," he murmured into your hair, the words so familiar now, but somehow more precious each time.
You nestled into his embrace, letting your worries fade for the moment, feeling a sense of peace settle over you. "I love you, too," you replied, your voice barely above a breath, but you meant it with everything you had.
"Y'know darlin'...I was very close to shootin' myself if I had to sleep on the cold bed any longer. It took strength to control myself and not drag you out-" You rolled your eyes and pulled away.
"Right, now go away, I have work to do."
"Absolutely not. To hell with these damn chores. You are coming with me."
You shot him a skeptical glance, hands on your hips as you paused in your tracks. "Really?" you said, raising an eyebrow.
A grin tugged at the corners of his lips as he stepped closer, his broad frame encroaching on your space. "What do you think, darlin'?" he teased, his hands coming up to cradle your face, nearly squishing it with playful force. He gave your head a gentle shake, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "It’s been too damn long. You’ve had me sleeping like a corpse for days. You cruel woman."
You tried to hold back the laugh that bubbled up in your chest, but his determination was infectious "Fine," you muttered, giving in more to his presence than anything else. He grinned, his hands reaching for you, pulling you effortlessly toward the flap of his tent.
"Atta girl." His voice held a triumphant edge, but it was softened with affection.
And finally, after days, the enforcer's tent flaps were closed at night--and so was the distance between you two.
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(AN: Req/asks closed for now, guys :/ do keep in mind ur ideas and send once I'll announce them open. But u can always send me ur thoughts or dm.)
104 notes · View notes
yayll · 2 months ago
Note
Hiii i hope you're feeling better soon :(( I was wondering if I could request a Dazai x reader fic where the reader has PTSD? Specifically, the beginning of autumn kind of triggers her (sorry if it's a confusing i dunno how to word it lol) Could it be fluff/comfort? Btw I love your writing style so badly so pls tweak the idea if you think it would work better! And no worries if you'd rather pass :33
hii angel i genuinely am sorry that this took me a while! (work and life happened a little more than usual, GOT SICK and barely had time to sit down and write.) it was so ivover but i am fine now thank u so much bub!
i REALLY hope you like this and that it's what u wanted, i've never written someone w PTSD before and i was just rlly hoping i didn't mess this characterization up for ur request ahhh. i had such a nice time writing it and i rlly wanted to explore the impact it could have around reader and dazai and him going out of his way even if it could be a little goofy and sappy to make u feel at least a little better even if u can't talk abt it.
i love uuuu thank u again! <3
~ a little something about Dazai noticing harmful patterns and loving you through them ~
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He's been watching you sit by the window for the past half hour as you stare at what seems like the beginning of the new season outside. You were quieter than usual, more withdrawn and jumpy, which could only mean that you weren't sharing something with him- or rather having trouble processing something to the point where you didn't realize he could tell something inside you was on high alert.
Dazai would rather die than see you in such a state, especially during what's supposed to be such an exciting time of the year that's full of the things you usually love to do. Whatever is impeding you from enjoying the leaves falling has to be dealt with the most delicate of methods, but especially with love. If you taught him anything about the past haunting you to the point of mental distress, something he suffered bouts of every now and then when memories made days grow dark, it's that all you need is one person to truly witness you. Just like how you've seen the ugliest parts of him time and time again yet you still look at him with all the stars in the sky, stars he consumes like a black hole waiting to be filled.
Luckily for you, he has an arsenal of things he can try to soothe you with, because he wouldn't be a good detective AND boyfriend if he didn't keep all those context clues in his pocket for a bad day. Mainly though, he was just completely attuned to your every need. You are his happiness, and your wellness isn't up for debate: It's mandatory. He stands up from the loveseat with a deep exhale as he walks over to you, his lips curled in a lazy smile as he tests the waters to see what you could need from him without asking.
"You know, if you stay any more still I could probably paint you like one of those fancy paintings. What do you say, be my model?"
You look over at him from the window, and he can visibly tell you haven't been at ease lately. He suddenly realizes he's just fallen even more in love with you. That there is nothing in this world that could ever let him see you as anything but his heart.
You murmur, a faint smile decorating your serene face.
"Mm, I'm not sure. I don't think I could pose for that long, you know? It would probably be hard to catch my likeness, heh."
He clicks his tongue and rolls his eyes with a playful smirk. Oh how he wants to lean in and worship your likeness with his loving touch, but he decides to take it easy on the physical affection for now, not until he knows you're feeling up for it. He can be a good boy, something he usually isn't.
"Well, I wouldn't mind being the brave young knight who tries~ Shall we take this outside for better lighting?"
You instantly don't give him a good reaction to that. You shrug, seeming conflicted and unsure of yourself, but unable to really bring yourself to explain with words, something uncharacteristic of you.
No problem! Dazai thinks to himself. If you don't want to go outside, he can bring outside to you in the comfort of home. He'll enhance your safe space, and tailor it to just what you need. He hums, tapping his temple in an exaggerated manner as if he were thinking really hard and when he sees that it gets a small giggle out of you, he knows he's on the right track.
"Hm, I know what we should do instead. Wait here, angel.~"
He disappears into the hallway and you sit there as the sound of cabinets opening and rummaging around fills the air. You smile to yourself, and shake your head at the mental image of Dazai becoming a tornado to find whatever he's looking for right now, hoping he doesn't make too much of a mess. You fidget with your hair, twirling it in between your fingers as you take a deep grounding breath while you wait.
A moment later, he comes back with what seems like art supplies and a ton of mini candlesticks.
He knows you're intrigued when you tilt your head in confusion, but then again that's probably just the confusion... Dazai sets down two canvases along with the candles, flashing you a mischievous grin. If you couldn't process your feelings through words, art was always there! You look over the activities he's laid out for you both, awaiting his silver tongued explanation.
"You know when I want to be the little spoon but I don't say anything?"
You laugh softly, and nod.
"Mhm, you get all moody and weird."
He nods back, a half smile on his face as he rests his hands on his hips. He wants to tell you that the only reason he even knew such intimate luxuries is because you showed him that he's worthy of it, of being loved, but he doesn't say anything. He lets the sweet memories between you swim through his mind as fuel for the day he's trying to create for you. His voice sounds more like he's talking out loud now, lost in a thought..
"You make me moody and weird. You also make me want to grab your soft little face and just..."
He then snaps back to the moment, and his tone picks up.
"... But alas, there is no time to waste! Come, sit, I'll get the other things ready.~"
He zooms off to the kitchen, and your heart softens at how much he fusses over you, though you also hope you aren't being too much. You know he'd hate to hear that, so you simply sit down and look over the supplies you had honestly forgotten you had.
Dazai makes tea, because he knows it helps with your fidgeting and you like how the mug feels in your hands, he also begins to set the candle sticks all over the living room, lighting them one by one. You flash him a look of faint concern.
"Feels like Dracula's castle. You sure this is safe, Osamu?"
He simply grins impishly.
"It's called 'mood lighting', cutie. There is an atmosphere to be created!"
"Yeah, and possibly a wildfire."
"Boo, you're no fun. Besides, that sounds like a problem for future us. We live in the moment."
Dazai would never risk your safety and you know that, which is why you don't push the topic any further.
You two settle in, the candles illuminating you both with a warm flame that feels more comforting than you'd like to admit, you feel yourself becoming more immersed in the random little doodles and brush strokes you create as you both talk for hours about literally nothing while sipping on your tea. Nothing feels nice, for once and Dazai can see it in the way you slowly become less and less tense. So mindful, so beautiful.
After you fill your canvas, you set it down, and peer over at Dazai's.
"What'd you paint?"
He smiles sheepishly, and hides his.
"Not finished yet. No peeking!"
He stands up and in one swift motion, runs outside, while leaving you bewildered at the spontaneity of the situation. A few moments later, he runs back inside, huffing with his arms behind his back. He sits back down on the floor with you, criss crossed. He grabs his canvas, and puts something on it as he slowly unveils his work to you.
It's a single crisp leaf he must have plucked from the grass when it fell, the orange and reddish hue placed on the canvas that shows a cartoonishly painted tree as well. He murmurs, eyes trained lovingly on you but with that familiar playful tone.
"I wanted you to get a little air. It's good for one's mood, you know."
You slowly take the leaf, and twiddle it in your thumb as you begin to smile to yourself. You mutter back.
"The weather changes, moods change, it's so overwhelming sometimes..."
He slowly leans in a little closer and places a hand on the small of your back, inching you closer to him too. He wants to distract you from those thoughts affecting you, but it's getting harder when all he can think about is how much you affect him. He whispers.
"My mood never changes, you're the most precious thing I have ever seen all year round."
You look up at him, your eyes communicating what you feel, and he picks up on it with a silent confirmation. You hold each other's gaze for a long quiet moment and when you feel ready you lean into his chest, nuzzling into him. He envelops you in a hug that feels like the remedy you've been searching for this whole time, and it almost brings you to tears. You don't know it also does the same to him. He gives you a soft squeeze and leans down to your ear, his warm breath feeling like the way life is supposed to feel. You mumble, your voice slightly muffled against him.
"Thank you, Osamu. Love you."
He smiles at that. To be something so soothing to you, to be of use for once in his life, it's a feeling that he could never describe. He'll have to find the words when he covers you in kisses from head to toe later, when he makes sure you feel the full extent of his devotion to you through thick and thin. He exhales deeply.
"Change of season, change of mind... It doesn't matter to me. It's still you. It will always be you."
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purgaytorysupremacy · 25 days ago
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update: he emailed being self-flagellating and then went on a rant about being conflict-adverse during class when we were talking about virtue theory as an example of a virtue he wishes he could cultivate and I had to just be like never-fucking-mind, man.
I know people say “just let people misunderstand you” and “be yourself! don’t care about what people think about you!” but have they actually sat in a room with people who can’t stand you and aren’t shy about it and how that makes you feel like an infinitesimally small dust mote on the wind???
#i also just had an episode like this with a friend when i asked them why they just up and disappear during a conversation#whenever it veers into emotional territory or even signals that way#and they were just like “sorry I went to bed early”#and it's like. I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT THIS AND ONLY THIS.#my prof apologizes for the way he challenged my question bc he obviously didn't hide his distain for the place we both live#(and the class was a guest speaker who did her phd on the identity of newfoundland settlers who was a german woman but it was really good)#(and we often disagree about whether nfld is actually a good place or not and the experience of living in st. john's is not representative)#and it's like yeah dude i've already picked up on your barely veiled venom about teaching at this university instead of like UofT. i got it#i know what the kind of people who went to UofT think of newfoundlanders. i've spent my life being looked down on by them. I KNOW.#but any time i try to address an ongoing thing by bringing it up when an incident happens never seems to work.#people will always just litigate the singular event no matter what.#i always think i'm phrasing it wrong but i reread the email and it didn't mention anything about that class specifically even!!!!#and i'm sure an option might be to be like “hey can we talk about this thing that's bothering me” outside of an event#but then i just keep getting told it didn't happen or it didn't happen that particular way or i misunderstood or they self-flagellate#and i just literally don't understand how people like. exist with other people. this guy has a kid! a relationship!#I don't even think he's that bad of a guy. he's a Certain Kind of Guy™️ but if anything our insecurities are too similar yk?#i'll say this class was way better. i sat up at the front so i did hear and understand better.#and the other person who hates me so much it drips off her wasn't there. and neither were the women who have to bring their kids to class.#the one who hates me isn't even registered in this class but she comes anyway bc that's who she is as a person lol#i get it in a way. her year last year only had her and one other person so i can see wanting to have these discussions with a full(er) clas#but also the conversation moved so much easier today? it was funny bc people almost seemed relieved that she wasn't there?#bc oh boy#speaking of classroom management problems haha#yesterday we were in class and it started at least 15 minutes late bc she kept talking to the prof about some convo they were having#from before class began and the prof couldn't figure out how to extricate himself from it (see: conflict-avoidant comment)#and she kept going and going bc no one felt like they could jump in and we were all whispering to each other#just general conversation and everything but it felt like WE were the ones being rude if we were to interrupt whatever they had going on?#so i dunno. maybe it was already kind of poisoned before I even said anything. who's to say.#but it felt like when people weren't afraid that she was going to pop in or one up them or “build off that” they were way more eager to tal#and I definitely talked less but not. not talking? i feel like i was very consciously choosing whether it was worth saying my point.
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nerves-nebula · 3 months ago
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thinkin about racism has got me remembering about how i took a class on freakshows and we spent a lot of the time talking about the racism and anti-blackness in freakshows an the teacher was very good about it, in fact it was apparently one of the driving things she wanted to make sure she talked about, but i was the only black kid in the class and when we made our final projects i made a drawing of an animalistic depiction of how i felt growing up around mostly white people and my classmates were stone fucking silent.
it was one of the worst feeling presentations i've given at this college, cuz i was being kinda genuine for once about my internalized antiblackness and how it effects how i see myself and how i felt like i was treated and they just. didn't say shit. no feedback.
after discussing and showing off how they understood the racism in a lot of freakshows my dumbass was like "oh ok so i can talk about how freakishness effected my relationship with race and how i see myself then" NO!!!!! IDIOT!!!
it's not even like i was the only non-white person, the class was half white half asian so i thought !!! AAhughhgndj gdsfgdsf and the animal form is supposed to be more complex than just "black person = animal" cuz i actually DO have weird tendencies that make me relate to animals & act kind of "animalistic" in the literal sense.
growling, hissing, snarling, sitting weird, loping around, shaking my head like a dog, the list goes on and on. and it's a complicated thing where i don't see those as bad habits to have, it's just that i know other people see them differently cuz i'm black and even if I wasn't kinda fuckin weird I'd already be assumed to be animalistic. and that'd be used to excuse treating me like i'm really less of a person. and that's not even getting into the hair or gender shit.
but i barely got to talk about any of that because nobody said shit.
it was devestatingggg and i honestly dunno why i thought it'd go better. this is the drawing btw. idk if i posted it here already.
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first ink drawing i'd made to that scale in like years. it's not great but i thought it was worth fuckin SOMETHING yknow. anyway. i should keep packing lol i've been avoiding it for like 2 hours
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jung-shook-iieee · 2 years ago
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Hot Wheels | KNJ
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➳Pairings: idol Namjoon x reader (f)
➳ rating: M ( obviously minors dni!)
➳ genre: idol verse, relationship au.
➳ warnings: namjoon is filthy hot here, super angry dom, sexy namjoon, use of degrading words, humiliation, teasing, y/n was literally walking on thin ice, until joonie breaks it, super meany joon, mmhh y/n playing with herself ( does that count as masturbation? Becoz joonie didn't let her finish?) Risky, joon was live y'all, Armies being very suspicious lol, joon flashes his bulge * mistakenly, joon cursing on live??????? and super dirty talking. ( I dunno what to add more lmao.)
➳ summary: teasing namjoon when he goes live could never get you in serious trouble, right?
➳ word count: 1.6k
➳ a/n: I actually..... Can someone just tell me what in the world do i have to do to get fucked by joon? I mean seriously... I can not take this anymore. I'm going FERAL for him. Xxxxxxxxxxxx
➳ a/n2: I live for mean joonie, I just can not stop myself from writing this. And I have no shame. No regrets. Do reblog tho, if you like it. Feedbacks are always welcomed. &lt;333
" Don't you dare baby, stay like this kay? Don't make this hard for both of us. I'll be quick. " Namjoon wrapped his muscular and veiny hand around your neck to keep you still. You've been a very bad, bad girl according to him, but you knew what you were doing.
It will easily piss Namjoon off, But you can't help it, can you?  you love to see when he struggled.......Struggled because of you, it was rare tho. It's always the other way around, you struggling for him and him being a sadist enjoyed your misery every single time.
So even if he punished you afterwards, you will willingly take your punishments. You totally loved the messier and clumsier side of him, usually Kim Namjoon carried himself as a wolf. Strong, powerful, and dominant but behind those cameras and people he's the clumsiest person you've ever seen.
Tease him about his mistakes and he will not think twice before railing you against the nearest wall so you could remember your place.
He loves you of course he does, but he loves you even more when you cry for him, from the pleasures he gives you. When you beg, squirm and cum for him.
So when he told you he is going live for armies and asked you to behave you don't why but your inner bitch told you other wise.
When he was setting up the things for his live , you simply stood up and walked towards the cupboard, the lower section was filled with different toys. You took out a simple black mini rabbit vibrator.
Namjoon didn't looked at you he was busy in his live by now. You walked back, discarded your clothes and threw your bra at his feet, which made him look at you.
He was speechless, he clearly told you to not make any sounds and here you were throwing your bra at him. Irony. He looked back at the tab and ignored your presence completely.
You started playing with yourself. You massaged your breast slowly, taking all the time in the world making yourself ready to play with, fondling your perky breast, twisting and pinching your soft nipples. You sensually snaked your hands on your stomach then slowly you reached at your lower part.
You were a dripping mess, so wet just by the mere thought of seducing Namjoon while he was on air, interacting with millions of armies.
Namjoon could see what you were doing, it was driving him crazy. He loved when you act as a brat, a bold person in front of him. Because after that he could punishment you all like he wants.
You turned around, ass in air and pussy all spread out for him to watch. The mini vibrator caused the shaking of your legs, namjoon sweared at the sight. You looked so tempting, so inviting like a sex goddess indeed.
He forced himself to tear his graze from you and focus on the live, sure by now all people would be curious and he knew that.
He just couldn't help himself but grab his aching bulge between his legs. You really made his cock rock hard, he was struggling keeping his posture straight.
He drank water frequently, paused while giving answers and he just sweared on live. What else can he do to get more troubles?
" Is someone with you oppa? " Namjoon repeated a comment and narrowed his eyes then replied, " Ohh aniyo... It's just the... Curtains. Haha. They keep disturbing me. " He struggled answering their question, which only made your lips twitch upward slightly and you turned around and pulled out the toy which was deep inside you.
You stood up and took out a hitachi wand from your cupboard. Namjoon bought it for you as a gift. You still remember the first time he used that thing on you, the orgasms from this thing were  really strong and powerful.
You switched on the toy and placed the settings at one.
The vibrations were killing you, if you continued longer you didn't know if you would be able to keep your moans suppressed. You muffled your moans by placing your small hand above your mouth.
It was really tough for Namjoon to keep his sanity intact. The mere sight of you was driving him crazy, your legs were wide spread, your boobs looked so soft, a toy was stimulating your throbbing clit , you were so wet he could easily see your slick all over your thighs and bedsheet.
You mouthed PLEASE asking him to fuck you, Namjoon forcefully dragged his eyes from you to the tab he pretended like he's interested in the live but no he wasn't. All of his attention was on you now, you did got his attention.
It was getting impossible for him to remain collected so he asked, " Just a second people I'll be back, I need to use restroom hehe. I'll be quick. " And he muted his live, he forgot that the people might see his aching big buldge but he do not give two fucks about that now.
When he marched towards you, to say you were scared will be a understatement. His jaw was clenched and he fisted his hands. You quickly closed your legs and tried to sit up but he dragged you up by your neck, " What do you think you're doing huh?" That voice. That fucking voice sent chills down your spine, you Whimpered from the way he was squeezing your neck tight, cutting the supply of air.
" Do you FUCKING THINK this shit is FUNNY huh?? " He whispered yelled and slammed your head against the headboard and slapped your wet cunt, throwing the expensive wand on floor, making you whimper.
" Don't... Don't fucking close your legs on me now baby, you were spreading your legs like a whore just a minute ago. " He whispered in your ear, his voice could easily make you cum let his hands and dick alone.
" M'sorr-yyyy joon" You gasped sang, barely audible but he heard you, " Now, now, now don't say that okay? I know your not FUCKING SORRY." You but your lower lips knowingly, you knew this was coming, you asked for it. Actually no you begged for it so you can do nothing but to take his punishments like a big girl.
He stuffed his big and thick fingers inside your little cunt making you arch your back and he rammed his fingers so fast and deep inside you making you out of breath.
He pulled away after a minute or two, he needs to get back to the live and may be end it properly. You quickly held his hands and dragged his fingers on your needy cunt for more but he pulled away his hands " Don't you dare baby, stay like this kay? Don't make this hard for both of us. I'll be quick. " Namjoon wrapped his muscular and veiny hand around your neck to keep you still. You only nodded and waited for him.
You obeyed him because you don't want to piss him any more, you knew after this he would be leaving you with a numb and sore pussy anyway.
He sucked his fingers clean, closed his eyes tasting your essence. He growled, you tasted so good he just couldn't wait. You immediately shut your legs close feeling more wet at his lewd action.
He adjusted his crotch and went back on his chair. He unmuted the live and again started answering their questions and laughing with them.
They did asked questions because they were suspicious but he made excuses and cleared there doubts. After 5-10 mins he bid goodbye and turned off the tab.
He closed his eyes, and sighed. You could see how tense he was, the fear of getting caught by army was exciting but scary also. It could've lead him to some serious trouble.
He opened his eyes and looked at you, silently. His breath was slow, his dragon eyes covered in lust and anger. He looked so intimidating to you. You were scared, so scared. Neither you nor he was speaking anything but his gaze was sending you over the edge. You stared at your legs, you just couldn't look at him in his eyes.
Your breath hitched when he stood up and started taking slow steps towards you, you didn't dared to raise your eyes but you could feel him standing next to you.
He grabbed your jaw harshly making you whimper, " Explain. " He demanded. You couldn't speak the words out from your mouth. His grip was becoming harsher.
" Pl-easeee-" , " Please what?? Huh? Did I fucking stuttered baby? Or did I gave you the permission to touch yourself? Or to touch the toys? " He questioned but you were in a deep haze from the pain and pleasure that you couldn't make yourself to speak.
" You're just a dumb whore right? You can't speak unless I force you? " He was speaking with so much anger and authority that even his degradation was sending direct waves of pleasure to your core.
He took off his sweatshirt and his chest looked so good, so tempting . Your palms were itching to  touch him you slowly raised your hands towards him but he gripped it harshly making you groan in displeasure," After the stunt you've pulled y/n do you think I'm letting you touch me.?" The tone of his voice was cold, like a warning to you, bet any other person would run away but you, you begged him to treat you this way.
he stood beside you with his naked broad chest. The pecs really looked yummy tho, namjoon's muscles only got thicker after he started doing gym.
He climbed up in the bed, stood on his knees and spoke in your ears, " You really put me in a bad position today baby, now I'll exactly give you what you've been craving for. "
Well, you couldn't deny him can you!? You just gotta take what he gives.
...........................................................................................................
Masterlist.
@yellabella77 @screamertannie @sweetwolfcupcake @bri-mal @hoseokteardrop @kooookie @favfanfictsbts @ciennnthia @yopjm @sunny-favs @heyyymin
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whimsi-clown · 7 months ago
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Hi strangers! I 'm currently going on a Disney movie marathon for the 3rd part of my RIDV AU fic, so here are some incorrect quotes while you wait.
Tags: @demodemo909, @imtryingandtired, @missmannequin.
(Thank you guys so much for showing appreciation for the dumb Disney Villains AU I made on a whim, and I hope these even dumber incorrect quotes can entertain you while waiting on the next part!)
Warning: The usual, cursing, OOC, and itty bitty inappropriate jokes. Also, it's long, like, really long. I had too much fun with these quotes, and it shows.
Hey hey! Life in the Villain house! Oh yeah! Life in the Villain house! Reader! Life in the Villain house!~
(If you understood this reference, I am both sorry and not sorry at the same time)
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*Disney Villains suddenly appearing before you*
You : I dunno if I'm ready to process the ramifications of this bullshit.
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Gaston: Our dear host is playing hard to get.
Gaston: Little do they know, I'm a master at playing hard to get rid of.
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You : *Venting endlessly to Hades about your week*
Hades, every once in a while: *In a monotone* Wow, that is so wild.
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You: Wake up! The sun is shining!
Cruela: What do you want me to do, photosynthesis?
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Gaston: I love you.
You: How many people have you said that to?
Gaston: Everyone.
You: What?
Gaston: I told everyone that I love you.
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You: Look guys, I need help.
Ursula: Love help?
Hades: Financial help?
Captain Hook: Emotional help?
Oogie Boogie: Help moving a body?
*Everybody looks at Oogie Boogie*
Oogie Boogie: What?
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You, to Jafar: How do you tell someone politely you want to hit them with a brick?
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You: Why do you keep a diary?!
Captain Hook: To keep secrets from your computer.
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You, filling out legal paperwork: Were you guys born AMAB or AFAB?
Maleficent: Bold of you to assume I was born at all.
Oogie Boogie: Personally, I think I was made in a lab.
Hades: I just straight up spawned, lol.
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Gaston: The ‘how the fucks’ and 'why are you so dumbs’ don’t matter. All that matters is that I have a new gun.
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Captain Hook: *Slowly pushes a 17th-century cannon into a modern bank* Okay, everyone, be calm. This is a robbery.
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Oogie Boogie: If I can't cause tiny bits of chaos every day, I think my body will shut down.
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You: All of your existences are confusing.
The villains: How so?
You: Your presence is annoying, but the thought of anything bad happening to any of you guys upsets me.
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You: As a responsible adult-
The villains: *snickers*
You: ... As a responsible adult—
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You: I don't like bugs. Oogie Boogie, are you even listening to me?
Oogie Boogie: I seem to have misplaced some of my bugs.
You, at Hades (aka your personal flame thrower): HAADDDEEEESSSSS!!!
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*Talking on the phone*
Hades: Remember how I said that the gang and I were gonna have a calm night out for once?
You: ... Yeah?
Hades: Well, we’re in jail.
You: *Hangs up*
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Hades: *Gets set on fire and screams in agony*
Hades: Nah, I’m just kidding. Fire does nothing to me. Literally.
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You: Something tells me Oogie Boogie's going to be a bit more unhinged today...
*Meanwhile, in the villain house*
Oogie Boogie, holding a lit match and a bag of cheetos: Leave me be, the host isn't home to stop me, I'm going feral.
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You: COMPANY IS COMING! I WANT THIS PLACE LOOKING LIKE DISNEY ON ICE IN ONE MINUTE!
You: GASTON IF YOU HAVEN'T MADE YOUR BED THROW IT AWAY IT'S TOO LATE TO MAKE IT NOW!
You: GET RID OF THE COUCHES, WE CAN'T LET PEOPLE KNOW WE S I T !
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A complete stranger, looking at the disney villains who are experiencing and interacting with the outside world for the first time: Those guys look like a problem...
You: Yes, but they’re my problem.
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You, looking at the villains: Okay, so I need to become a therapist faster.
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Captain Hook, drowning in crocodile infested waters: Help me host!
You: Don't worry, I heard cowards float.
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Grimhilde: Do you want to explain the text you sent me last night?
You: It was autocorrect.
Grimhilde: Autocorrect wrote, "You're so hot. Please step on me."?
You: Yes.
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You, talking to the villains: As you know, I keep a list of all of you in order of how likely they are to betray me.
Oogie Boogie: Where am I on the list?
You: Well, I can’t tell you that because then you’ll quickly move up or down depending on your reaction.
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Gaston: Dinosaurs aren't extinct. I mean, Grimhilde is walking in this room.
You: *Wheezes*
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You: HYDRATE OR DIE-DRATE!
You: *Aggressively throws water bottles*
Hades: Uh... What's up with them?
Jafar: They're trying to yell mental health and wellbeing into us.
You, aggressively shouting: I APPRECIATE ALL OF YOU!
Captain Hook, crying: It's working.
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Gaston: Can you be quiet?! I'm trying to think.
You: Don't worry. Doing anything for the first time is difficult.
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Dr. Facilier: Fuck capitalism. It's a rigged system that keeps us poor, and it ain't fair. You shouldn't need to work three jobs to afford basic necessities.
Dr. Facilier, playing Monopoly: Sorry, if you wanted to win, you should have tried not being poor.
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Scar: I prevented a murder today.
You: Really? That’s amazing! How did you do that?
Scar: Self-control.
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You: Holy shit, Hades, do you know what this means?!
Hades: Babes, whenever you start doing this, nobody knows what you mean.
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Gaston, throwing their head into you lap: Tell me I'm pretty!
You, unphased and stroking his hair: You're pretty fucking annoying, that's what you are.
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Gaston: Why don’t they find me sexy when I bite my lip?
Hades: What do you look like when you bite your lip?
Gaston: *Bites lip*
Hades: ... Have you considered biting your bottom lip instead?
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You: *Fills up bottle and drinks from that*
Jafar: *Brought 4 bottles of water so this wouldn’t happen*
Shan Yu: *Drinks straight from the tap*
Hades: *Dehydrates*
Scar: *Drinks from the puddle of water on the floor*
Oogie Boogie: *Licks the tap, doesn’t even need a drink*
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Dr. Facilier: *Looks over your shoulder and at your laptop* What the fuck?
You: *Slams screen shut* It’s just research! For something I’m writing about! I swear that’s it!
Dr. Facilier: Why the hell would that involve the breeding habits of frogs?
You: It’s not just “frogs”, it’s the Surinam Toad. And it’s not “breeding habits”, it’s how they raise their young. This is important information my audience needs to know!
Dr. Facilier: That doesn’t change the fact this is for one line in a fanfiction.
You, offendedly: You don’t know that!
Dr. Facilier: I don't hear no denial.
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You: I love cooking breakfast. It makes the whole house smell like bacon.
Grimhilde: That’s true, but it also smells like fire and panic.
You: Hades and the smoke detector need to get off my case.
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Hades, grinning: Before you were what?
Maleficent: Before I was-
Hades: What?
Maleficent: Before I was inter-
Hades: Before you were interrupted?
Maleficent: Cut me off one more time and I swear I'll-
Hades: What?
Maleficent: *Makes a frustrated sound*
You, nervously laughing: Ahahaha, please stop that before she turns into a dragon and burns my house down.
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*The normal looking villains walking at the mall*
Dr. Facilier: Hey, have any of y'all seen our host? They’ve been gone for a while..
Grimhilde, not the least bit concerned: No, we have not.
Shan Yu : I haven’t...
Cruela: They probably just ran off to the McDonald’s or something.
You: Hey.
Captain Hook: Oh, there they are-
Gaston: What the-
Jafar: I- where were you?!
You: ... Walking right behind you guys.
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Gaston: Well, remember when our host made a romantic dinner for me?
Hades: Gaston, they microwaved you a pizza.
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Shan Yu: Someone will die...
You: Of fun!
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You: Could you be anymore annoying?
Oogie Boogie: Yes.
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You: Oogie Boogie, you can do anything!
Oogie Boogie: Anything?
You: Anything!
Oogie Boogie, holding a torch: ANYTHING?!?!
You: Wait, not that!
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Gaston, playing a video game for the first: This thing is so frustrating! I hate it, I hate it, I hate it!
You: Ok, I think it’s time to turn off the game for a little while.
Gaston: But I’m having fun!
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Gaston: *Gasp*
You: wHAT??
Gaston: What if soy milk is just milk introducing itself in Spanish?
You: *Inhales*
Cruela, in another room with Ursula: Why can I hear screeching?
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Dr. Facilier: Surgery is basically just stabbing someone to life.
You: Please never become a surgeon.
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You: I was arrested for being too cool.
Jafar: The charges were dropped due to a lack of supporting evidence.
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Dr. Facilier: Damn, the power went out.
You: Don’t worry, I got this.
You: *Stomps foot*
Dr. Facilier: What-?
You: *Sketchers light up*
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You: What do you have?
Oogie Boogie: A KNIFE!
You: NO!
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Kidnapper: I have one of your friends.
You: Which one? I have twelve.
Kidnapper: The loud, annoying, rowdy one who never shuts up.
You: Which one? I have twelve.
Gaston, distantly: HEY!!!
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Scar: Given the circumstances, I will let you hug me for four to five seconds.
You: Forty five seconds?!?
Scar: No! I said four TO five seconds.
You, hugging Scar: Too late.
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Shan Yu: I have an army.
You: We have Oogie Boogie.
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*The villains playing Among Us*
Jafar: I believe Shan Yu is innocent, I was with him the whole time. Oogie Boogie, what were you doing?
Oogie Boogie: Oh, I was just murdering-… I mean, nothing!
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Grimhilde: When we get back, I'm going to step on you!
You: Okay, as much as I might enjoy that, Your highness–
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Jafar: Who would you kill out of the four of us, Hades?
Hades: Gaston, easily.
Gaston, confused: What, why??
Hades: Well, cuz I hate you, and the host would be too easy. They’d probably be into it.
You, standing in the doorway with the most bewildered expression: What the fuck man!?
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You: I think it’s time I get my life in order.
Dr. Facilier, narrating: But they did not get their life in order. In fact, they got drunk last night and fought a raccoon.
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*Scar hears about you bringing home a stray cat.*
Scar, sarcastically: I can't believe there's another cat somewhere in this house. Amazing feeling. Love that. And it's here, in this house! Somewhere! And I may encounter it! What a treat...
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*The female villains after watching The Wizard of Oz*
Grimhilde: Where the devil is Maleficent?
Ursula: Well, it's raining outside... Maybe they melted?
Cruela: Shall I look outside for a pointy set of horns?
——————————————————————————————
Hades: Any idiot would know that.
Gaston: I knew that!
Hades: See?
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Scar: I'm not lazy, I just find it hard to put effort into things I'm not passionate about.
You: What are you passionate about?
Scar: Sleeping.
——————————————————————————————
Gaston: Without ugly, there would be no beauty in this world.
Grimhilde: Thank you for your sacrifice, Gaston.
——————————————————————————————
You: If I see a bug, I'll simply leave the room elegantly and have Hades to do something about it.
You: And if he doesn't fulfill my wish, I simply never go back in there.
——————————————————————————————
Dr. Facilier, looking at a dead phone: How do we bring this thing back to life? Magic? Live sacrifice? I know a guy in town-
——————————————————————————————
You: I haven't seen Gaston and Hades for fifteen minutes now.
*Outside a nearby window, a car without a driver inside is seen rolling down a driveway, with Gaston and Hades running after it in a panic. You don't look outside at all.*
You: That probably means they're getting into trouble.
——————————————————————————————
You: Go to hell!
Hades: Where do you think I come from?
——————————————————————————————
Oogie Boogie: People tell me I have a unique way of lighting up a room.
You: It’s called arson, and those people are called witnesses.
——————————————————————————————
Dr. Facilier: What are y’all’s favorite things to wake up to?
Grimhilde: Breakfast in bed.
You: Emails from AO3!
Shan Yu: My favorite thing to wake up to is not waking up at all.
Shan Yu: The screams of my enemies are a close second, though.
——————————————————————————————
You: Question. When they shot Bambi's mother, did you find that a sad moment... At all?
Gaston: I'm sure she's mounted on a nice wall in a fine home somewhere.
——————————————————————————————
Oogie Boogie: Treat bugs the way you want to be treated!
You: Killed without hesitation.
——————————————————————————————
Captain Hook, recently learned modern swears: FIGHT ME, YOU NERD ASS SLUT!
You: At least try to sound slightly more sophisticated when you threaten someone.
Captain Hook: Oh, I'm sorry. I should ask; dost thou want to engage in a duel, my good bitch?
You: Somehow, that's worse.
——————————————————————————————
Maleficent: We all have our demons...
You, grabbing Oogie Boogie: This one’s mine!
——————————————————————————————
Shan Yu: You know you've made it when you see your picture everywhere you go.
You: Those are wanted posters!
——————————————————————————————
Captain Hook: So, what's for dinner?
You, staring at the food you burnt: Regret.
——————————————————————————————
Gaston: So, I've been thinking-
You: Again?? That's dangerous.
——————————————————————————————
Hades: Why would you do that?
You: Because I feel guilty.
Maleficent: Guilt is a trick emotion. It’s put there by your parents to stop you from doing things that feel good.
——————————————————————————————
You: *Eating a cinnamon roll*
Oogie Boogie: Cannibalism.
You: *Confused chewing noises*
——————————————————————————————
*At the supermarket*
Captain Hook: All right, the last item on the list is "virgin oil."
Captain Hook:
Captain Hook: Wow. Imagine being an item and still being called a virgin.
——————————————————————————————
You: What’s your body count?
Captain Hook: Do you mean sex or murder?
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You: *Is wearing silk pants* How does this look?
Cruela: Like its slips on and off really easily.
You:
Cruela: No, I didn't mean it like that-
Ursula: We know what you meant.
——————————————————————————————
You: Bonjour, Dr. Facilier. Voulez–vous coucher avec moi?
Dr. Facilier: No, I don't want to sleep with you.
You: ... Is that what that means??
——————————————————————————————
You: I'm gonna eat the chicken breasts!
Gaston, snickering: Yeah, eat what you lack,
You, deadpanning at Gaston: Then maybe I should order brains on delivery for you.
——————————————————————————————
Jafar: I committed all 7 deadly sins in 30 minutes.
Hades: Wow, I've gotta hear this.
Jafar: I was angry and envious of my neighbor, so I lazily seduced his wife and ate all his groceries and didn't share.
Hades: You forgot pride.
Jafar: No, I'm pretty proud of this.
——————————————————————————————
Maleficent: Our dear host annoyed me today, so I told them that I can’t wait for them to see what I had planned for our special day tomorrow.
Scar: There is nothing special about tomorrow.
Maleficent: But there is something special about watching the color leave their face as panic takes over.
——————————————————————————————
You: You’re all insane!
The villains: Sure we are, what’s your point?
——————————————————————————————
Gaston: I want you to be with me for the rest of your life.
You: Damn, that sounds like a marriage proposal... A really one-sided one.
Gaston, getting down on one knee: That's because it is.
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You, admiring and petting a sleeping Scar: You’re so cute.
Scar, sleepily: I could tear you limb from limb with my bare fangs.
You, lovingly: I know.
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Oogie Boogie: *Writing a letter*
Oogie Boogie: Dear Sandy Claws,
I'm writing to let you know I've been naughty...
And it was worth it, you fat, judgemental bastard.
——————————————————————————————
You, dealing with the villains: Like, no offense to myself and all, but what the fuck am I actually doing?
——————————————————————————————
*You are cleaning the house, and you find an empty bottle of orange juice*
You: Clear orange juice?
You: Oh, it's empty.
Most of the villains, who had been watching the entire time: We live with an idiot. We live with an idiot. We live with an idiot.
——————————————————————————————
Scar: Our relationship is strictly professional.
You, brushing Scar's mane as he lays his head on your lap: Absolutely. Only business.
——————————————————————————————
All the female villains: We're not like other girls. We're way, way worse.
——————————————————————————————
Captain Hook: There. How do I look?
Dr. Facilier: Like a cheap French harlot.
Captain Hook: French?!
——————————————————————————————
Shan Yu, towering over you and glaring down at you: I could kill you if I wanted to little host.
You absolutely done with his bs: Oh yeah? Well, guess what. So could any other human being. So could a dog. So could a dedicated duck. You aren't special.
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Hades: Some people say that I have a god complex. I’d like to think that I’m a complex god.
——————————————————————————————
You: Captain, you're drunk.
Captain Hook: Correction: drinking. Present tense. Grammar, my dear host.
——————————————————————————————
Jafar: There’s always that one weak individual within the group who isn’t down with murder.
Jafar: *Glares at you*
You: ... Well sorry I have morals!
——————————————————————————————
Shan Yu, singing to the tune of I Kissed a Girl: I killed a guy, and I liked it-
Dr. Facilier, whispering: Should we call someone?
You, also singing: The taste of his cherry chapstick.
Captain Hook, appalled: Call Maleficent.
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Oogie Boogie: Get in the Halloween spirit and make a ghost!
You: That’s called murder and I heard somewhere that it's illegal.
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You: You remind me of the ocean.
Ursula: Because I'm deep and mysterious?
You: No, because you're full of salt, and you scare people.
——————————————————————————————
Oogie Boogie: Something’s off.
You: Maybe you’ve finally developed human emotions and feel bad for hurting people.
Oogie Boogie: No, but that’s funny.
——————————————————————————————
You: What do you call disobeying the law?
The villains: A hobby.
You: *Crosses their arms*
The villains: ... That we do not engage in.
——————————————————————————————
You: Stop thinking whatever you're thinking.
Gaston: Huh?
You: You always make that face when you're about to say something stupid. So cut it out-
Gaston: I love you.
You:
Gaston:
Gaston: Also, cereal qualifies as a soup.
You: I KNEW IT!!!
——————————————————————————————
You, extremely touched: Aw, you guys really put aside everything and came all this way for me?
You:
You, confused: How did you even get here so fast??
Cruela: Several traffic violations.
Jafar: Three counts of resisting arrest.
Gaston: Roughly thirteen cans of those energy drinks you like so much.
Dr. Facilier: Also, this aint our car.
——————————————————————————————
If you made it to this part, then congratulations! You made it through all 101 incorrect quotes! (I know, I counted them myself)
I hope you enjoyed them!
And for those of you who read through all of this and have no idea what you just read, here's Part 1 of the Reverse Isekai Disney Villains AU for context.
Thanks for reading!
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aztarion · 16 days ago
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Give me some fun facts about Soledad rn or I’ll do something…dunno what yet…
im sorry i took so long getting to this T_T thank you for asking!!! this went off-road many times with me overthinking it i just couldn't save it but hopefully it's still readable, i tried to do a mix of character and meta while not repeating anything from prev asks and then it kind of morphed into a weird bio lmao
her full name is Solona ‘Sol’ ‘Soledad’ Castillo; born 1/11/72 and raised in soledad, california, until her parents moved to sierra vista, arizona. died embraced 1/11/98, so forever 26 (and chronologically a fresh 48 during the events of Night Road).
by that time in 2020 her mom and dad have both passed and her older brother is 52; he runs their dad’s mechanical repair workshop there. she absolutely still does the sad little drive-by late at night every couple of months if she's in the area on a job (surgical mask on and hood up of course). i hc that julian, while keeping an occasional spying eye on her during the 10 yr absence, also looks out for her brother and sends business his way unbeknown to her lol
she ended up 3/3 fully blood bonded to julian in the beginning while they worked for the cam, and julian was 2/3 bonded to her. his “wasn't it romantic?” comment -- yeah literally too romantic, get back to work and feed the big underground nosferatu both of you 😤 i like that headcanon personally as another reason why he would cut contact so suddenly with sol when they were in a relationship — to break the bond on both sides; he could obsess strictly over 2100X and her desires would be completely her own again
another headcanon i'm sorry... after the diablerie of aila and the intense guilt that came with the act, plus julian (her sire) abandoning her and essentially straining and forcing their bond to fade, she gains the bulimia derangement. i paired that with the siren predator type lmfao. so very um dramatic all around when shes having a bad night. she restricts to bagged blood for like ten years working as a courier and just resigns herself to being perpetually dour and unsatisfied. i like to write her easygoing and much more lively when she's with julian during their work for the local camarilla, like the reality of her new condition hasn’t really sank in because omg julian's sooo fun and woah this world is crazy but at least julian's here he's gonna change everything or something (she believed in his vision and ideals even if she didn't fully grasp the scope at that time -- like she was on board at least. bless her she had 2 intelligence). she then becomes very muted pre-night road while the bond fades and the uglier, lonelier facets of being a vampire surface; having to pull together an independent undead existence for herself, trying to control her beast while feeding exclusively on bagged blood as job payment, then a little more tearing at the seams upon arriving in tucson during night road (resentment, guilt, anger, desire, longing, hunger for something that won't have a plastic aftertaste, all rushing back and blurring together at once; not so good a grasp on those when she’s been keeping herself numb and isolated and constantly on the move for a decade). behind everything she is desperate for connection
she has a good control on her beast thanks to that (monastic? lmao) decade (and high willpower/composure/resolve), until returning to tucson and stirring aila’s presence; the strange link to lettow, julian showing up, old memories and feelings that aren't even always her own now gathering on this very carefully crafted veneer like plaque. also suddenly having a ghoul and her own assets to worry about kind of freaks her out due to her own existential uncertainty and not really trusting herself. not even really knowing who she is. and she really likes elena right off the bat; she usually puts herself in more danger as to not risk her ghoul in the exact situations one would find themselves needing a damn ghoul in — she is literally the worst kindred ever in terms of priorities and self-preservation
speaking of her beast, it's very much that of a scorpion or snake… yes blunt-object-to-the-back-of-the-head-symbolism with some of her tattoos 😭 she stays lowkey, tries not to put herself under circumstances that would provoke or overly strain it, can keep it in check relatively well due to avid practice being a loner control freak, but when it snaps it's like an inland taipan. actually one of my fav moments playing with her in night road: so she chooses to continue feeding on blood bags in tucson, but when she finally had the opportunity to indulge with her predator type and a live target in dallas, she fucking got a critical success and killed them T_T this was after impulsively kissing julian back at the apartment d'espine allows you to stay at while in the area too. real in-character off-the-rails moment rip
i mentioned before but under the composed exterior she tries to present, she intensely seeks connection to something or someone. unfortunately the way she sees it: lettow is drawn to her because of the remnants of aila lingering within her -- also she literally ate his girlfriend, she's still not ok with that even if he forgives her because of course i gave my vampire oc morals and a guilty conscience (meanwhile cobie is eating people whole like twice a day); julian has no issue using her for whatever despite his affections, and elena is literally blood bonded to her, which sol is constantly thinking about elena's feelings and best interests — its a little bit of a sore spot for past reasons...
she gets on well with dove and begrudgingly really likes carlos (they absolutely cuss eachother out in very aggressive spanish one minute but he will pass her the roach the next) and she simped so bad for invidia caul — i think sol’s type is just a combo of super intelligence + willingness to engage in unethical experimentation lmfao. she's like omg noooo i don't understand wtf you're saying and that's sexy to me also your actions make me feel bad and are very ‘end-justifies-the-kind-of-morally-bankrupt-means’ but i cannot deny if they work out the ‘end’ would be really beneficial to kine and kindred... woe… hashtag conflicted and a little turned on. but she's very drawn to people who are idealistic or driven in an inherent ‘i want to help then i'll have purpose’ way. also the thrill. omg im just psychoanalysing her at this point sorry. this bitch would easily be indoctrinated into a cult is what it all boils down to + the extreme loyalty means she'd probably end up the cult leader's right-hand arm man his everything his confidant his best friend his silly rabbit 🤦‍♀️
also a follower in the streets but more of a leader in the sheets who said that
ok random stuff... she has those brown eyes that when she was human would glare almost red-orange when caught in straight sunlight; super deep chestnut, it only comes through under certain fluorescents these nights
very thick long hair; naturally has a kink/wave to it, quickly prone to returning to that state even when straightened, esp in the southwest's heat. usually loose when in tucson or dressing up, or braided ponytail on the road/job which i am so afraid to draw
nails are sharp like mini claws unless she’s specifically clipped them after rousing. they extend obscenely when she pops protean. i need to draw her fangs but they’re feline/kittenish: weirdly long and thin like staple punches, and again when she pops protean they extend like a snakes
her character color scheme runs warm-dark: black, brown, ochre, sienna, umber, burnt orange, deep shades of red, and maybe some random olive. style-wise it’s a mixed bag of practical minimalist and sleek; street and active wear, the occasional gold-ruby-emerald or leopard print dolce & gabbana-esque gaudy accent. very feminine on top; skin tight, low cut, corseted or cropped, paired with something oversized; men’s beaten-soft leather jackets, vintage driving jackets, or blazers. pants go either way: form fitting or baggy and belted depending on whatever silhouette she wants to cut. think of like the swaggiest 70s cuban drug lord/80s gangster restyled on 90s supermodel Naomi Campbell or something. with formal-wear i really like her in off-shoulder stuff. i try to draw her tattoos more in art bc it makes her more fun to look at but as a courier she wears driving gloves and long pants/boots to cover them up, and baseball caps or large sunglasses (yes at night. loser) to keep herself mostly unidentifiable
THANK YOU FOR ASKING ABOUT MY BLORBO!!!! :'3
prev info/asks jic: 0 , 1 , 2
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certifiedsexed · 18 days ago
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I'm the anon who was asking about viewing pregnancy as sexual a while ago. Yeah, it's the second case, it's more like an intrusive thought. It's not really a kink thing, in a sexual context, I'm generally indifferent to it (it's honestly completely inoffensive, and i'm not the type to be offended by unusual sex anyway), but in nonsexual contexts, I can't help but think about it as if it's a sexual thing I'm seeing. I know it's wrong logically, but intrusive thoughts are just like that. Though I don't think I can afford to go see a therapist for that, it's not, like, fucking my life up or anything. I'd just like to know some general thinking patterns to dissuade that kind of "ugh i know it's a common sex fetish so i can't stop thinking about it" thinking. If you're able to help, of course.
Oh, see that makes sense! I deal frequently with intrusive thoughts and that's a common type.
My first suggestion is always give those thoughts a name, separate them from yourself. [I used to call some of my worst thoughts "Bitch", lol.] And when they appear, don't freak out [you're doing great on that front, by the sounds of it], just go "Oh fuck off, [insert name]," or "that's not true, [insert name], shut up".
Also genuinely sitting down and talking yourself through why these thoughts are not based in reality can be helpful in shrugging them off. Sometimes I write, sometimes I just talk myself through it aloud. I dunno why, but it helps.
But also, keep in mind you are not your thoughts. It can take awhile to change intrusive thought patterns and some never go away! That doesn't make you a bad person or anything like that.
I don't know how much this helps but I hope it does, even a little. Let me know if you have any other questions! <3
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dreemurr-skelememer · 8 months ago
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Consider this--
Dream and Nightmare are trans NOT because they were '''sex-less''' fire blobs thingys but because Nim created them from her own body, and since she's female, she would've just be able to produce XX chromosomes for them, so that would be that they're afab.
But this is just a therory, and gender theory (don't take this seriously lol, i'm aware that they're skeletons)
Anyways, as a trans person myself, i don't like much the idea of them being trans/agender due to them being genderless when born. Maybe it's just me but i don't like when a explanation for a character being genderqueer is something *super* 'unatural' or cosmic in nature. I dunno mannn,, Me craves for more characters in the fandom that are just gender nonconfroming because *they want and feel like it* man,,,,
dawg im gonna be so real with you, i see what you mean, but as a trans person: uhmm i dont mind???? them being just being genderqueer because theyre not natural and i dont think it's a bad thing whatsoever???????
you didnt say anything about it being bad at all but youre really wording it like its an iffy thing? 😭
i personally write them as non-binary because of the . same exact reason you wrote so this overall just feels like a bit of a weird thing to say LMAO i quite. like. the aspect that they're not cis because they're literally genderless blobs. it's really that simple. sometimes we don't need to overcomplicate it..............is all. gender identity can just exist and doesn't need an overarching reason to be. some people (including me) headcanon their gender that way because its just....gender! sometimes we don't need or want to think about it that much
enjoy your headcanon and theories!!! i appreciate it but word it a bit less...side-eye-y towards other headcanons.....??????????????????
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dundeey-art · 1 month ago
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Had no thoughts about prowl. the majority of the fandom thinks he's an asshole and they either hate him for it or love him for it.
So I read the entire wreckers saga for Verity initially, but you know what? Prowl really stood out to me. I wanted to see more of him, so I read the issues he was in and I truly don't understand where the whole "prowl is an asshole" came from, yes he does some bad stuff (so does everyone else) but i interpreted this as a means to an end.. i think he's always thinking about the future and the end of the war, and his actions reflect that. I'm pretty sure he even mentioned that he "has to make tough decisions for a better tomorrow" but don't quote me on that
I think trying to moralize anyone in the IDW comics is a bad idea LOL, love them as they are ( ̄ー ̄)b
I find it really interesting how prowl is like.. public enemy #1 in the fandom when there are others who are worse and get so much love. LIKE RODIMUS OH MY GOD DO NOT EVEN GET ME STARTED. He annoyed me so much while reading MTMTE. Seriously, the way everyone babygirl-ifies him and never talks about his wrongs, you'd swear rodimus is a pretty decent guy. He's infuriating, painfully immature, and egotistical, and those traits get people killed. Like at some point, he ignores advice from ultra magnus because he's petty, and it ends up a disaster... I'm not even gonna touch on his horrible friendship with drift.
I dunno how this turned into a rodimus rant (;ω;) BUT ANYWAY!! prowl is pretty incredible, and i didn't know for such a long time because of the fandom's mischaracterization of him.
— dream (*^3^)/~☆
holy fucking based...
YOU HIT THE NAIL ON THE HEAD!!!
indeed, if you just read the material, you'll see that prowl is wildly misinterpreted and exaggerated by the fandom. personally i like rodimus, but what you said is true. almost every character in IDW has committed terrible crimes, but those get excused or overlooked way more than prowl's do. prowl supposedly being the biggest war criminal in the story is a joke that gets boring really quickly.
its most likely about more than just his actions, though. i think prowl's personality puts people off. like hes a bit too unfriendly, not cute or quirky enough. but i like prowl, he's one of the few i can actually tolerate. but i guess thats just not the popular opinion. really, though, i think people that genuinely think prowl is an asshole are annoying. we probably wouldnt get along irl.
personality aside, i genuinely think prowl is an incredibly admirable character. he's like the anti-hero to me. it's clearly shown in his actions and motivations. far from the antagonist that some people claim he is.
im so glad you read it for yourself to come to your own conclusion and gained all this insight! thank you for sharing!!
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