#I don't think he would've let himself think about how Babs already had a present and loving dad in her life but the closest thing Tim had

[cologona]

He isn’t cognizant of how lonely he is, or that he’s touch-starved. He grew up around other variously neglected rich boys so he's used to being independent.

He takes orders in the field well but he struggles not to chafe when Bruce shows concern; being pushed away or ignored feels more comfortable than someone worrying about him. He doesn’t know how to react to it and he doesn’t know how to reciprocate. He fumbles so much in the beginning- just terribly socially awkward and pushy yet simultaneously too closed off too. Even when he grows and gets much better at playing the part of a high society heir or leader of a team of heroes, that kind of intimacy doesn’t come naturally to him. It’s something he has to think through. (Batman and the Drakes are both terrible people to learn norms from.)

On an intellectual level he understands that the way his parents treated him was a bad thing, but in his heart he can’t help but be kind of ambivalent. Yes he was disappointed whenever his parents forgot their promises or extended their trips, but it was also convenient. Not only because he was Robin, but also because it kept him from having to witness their failing marriage firsthand. He could love them both from afar- not very satisfying but preferable, comfortable.

Robin is a role that he has to grow into and adapt to- and to him it is a role. Tim understands Batman and Robin as symbols, and Robin is supposed to be the light to Batman’s shadow; the hope and innocence in the darkness. Tim is smart and has his own sense of humor but he’s not as talkative as Dick or boisterous like Jason. He loses himself in his cases and is prone to anxious spirals. If anything he’s more suited to Batman's persona than Robin. And there’s no sweeping past the fact that he took the mantle knowing that his predecessor died. It's a grim start to his career, and at some point he must've realized fully just what sort of risk he was taking, and continued on anyways. That kind of hope is more conviction than faith.

Tim is very familiar with the flaws of all his guardians. As much as he loves and admires them, underneath it is a distance and he sees cautionary tales in all of them. He won't be like Jack, who is flighty and unreliable. He won't be like Janet, haunted by regrets. For all their similarities, he won't be like Bruce either. He refuses to be Batman, he prefers Robin.

He has an instinct for when he just knows he's right about something, and then he's single-minded in his pursuit of the truth. It's what led him to discover Batman and Robin's secret identities and it's what motivated him to search for Batman when everyone was certain that he was dead- even at the cost of working with Ra's and nearly losing his life.

I have so many fucking feelings about Tim Drake but I don’t know how to put them in a post because all my thoughts are connected to each other in this tangled mass that can’t be put neatly onto paper and AARHGHDHHGHKL

[honeydewmuses-a]

@canon-fcdder said: ❝ Eh- You're too good for her anyway. ❞ Shinso offers as he hands Kaminari a drink, before sitting himself down beside him. While this was supposed to be a late-night study session, he figures that it's only natural the topic of a failed date come up... Frankly, Shinso would have been surprised if the other teen hadn't mentioned his earlier romantic attempt. Although, Shinso is surprised by the tension he'd felt at the start- releasing only when he was informed that they hadn't meshed well. But he'll unpack 'being happy that his friend's date went shitty' at a later time... Instead he grabs onto one of the assorted Pocky sticks from the table— strawberry, his favorite —and takes a bite, chewing for a moment in thought before he continues, ❝ Nothing against her, but I always figured you'd be with someone more... Just- more. Y'know? ❞ He doesn't know what exactly he's saying, and far be it for him to talk bad about another person... but it's hard not to when it comes to deciding whether or not someone deserves Kaminari. ❝ You're the kind of person who deserves the best there is... Someone who feels lucky to get to talk to you. ❞ Another bite, glancing at his notebook and away from Kaminari's face, flipping a page as he shrugs, ❝ I guess she just doesn't strike me as the type to realize how amazing something like that is. ❞ - (Have a bab who is very much trying to be a 'supportive friend' lol )

Kaminari is vaguely aware that there's something happening in his chest as he watches Shinso set him up with soda and snacks and kind words. He's vaguely aware that it feels good, and weird, and definitely more personal than anything the girl from earlier had made him feel. But he decides not to focus on it, instead opting to tuck his knees into his chest, lean onto Shinso, and take advantage of the fact that his friend seems willing to listen.

"It's not even that it didn't work out, y'know? People decide they don't wanna date me all the time. Like, all the time. I've shot my shot with probably half the people I know, and I'm obviously super single. So, like, I'm used to it.

"What gets me is that I finally get a date with a girl, a really pretty girl, and I dress up all cute for her and get all excited and then about halfway through she leans in and I think she's gonna kiss me and instead she whispers to me that look at that guy over there, that's her crush, she's only here to make him jealous."

Kaminari pouts, shoulders instinctively raising and tightening with frustration. He grabs aimlessly in the general direction of his drink, but when he fails to reach it, he just gives up and keeps talking. His position against Shinso's side is to comfortable to jeopardize.

"And I'm down with that!! If she had asked me to make a guy jealous, I would've done it and had a great time with it! But she didn't tell me until I already had my hopes up and now my heart hurts over nothing."

It's true. Kaminari's heart does hurt. He'd somehow managed to not fully register that until now, and he slumps further into his friend, letting- or maybe making- Shinso support more of his body weight.

Damn it. Tonight wasn't supposed to be a sad night.

"I dunno," he mumbles, "You don't have to listen to my whining. It just sucks."

That almost feels like a natural stopping point, but then he's hit with the need to make one more point. His hands become animated as he gets more energized, but he never moves from Shinso's side. The warmth and gentle comfort of physical contact is what's keeping him from feeling genuinely lonely, even if he doesn't fully process it as such.

"Actually, you're right. It's her loss, really. I'd be a great boyfriend! And girls- not just girls. People who don't see that don't deserve me. I'm cute and funny and kinda dumb in an endearing way and my quirk is super powerful and when I become a pro hero I'm gonna be loaded! And I'd buy you presents and kiss you on your hand and cheek and neck and sit in your lap in public and always hype you up and just be, like, the best boyfriend you could ever have."

As if to demonstrate his point, Kaminari throws his arms around Shinso, smushing his face even closer into his friend's chest. It's just an impulse, something that he initially attributes to an excess of energy and a need to thank Shinso for his support, but then he feels how bright his face is burning.

Shit.

These are new feelings. Or, really, they're well established feelings that he has yet to acknowledge. Not his fault he chooses to ignore stuff that isn't right in his face.

Awkwardly removing his arm from Shinso's front, he clears his throat and keeps his gaze down.

"I mean. Not you, you. The... the general you.

"Or you, specifically, if you want me, but I know Aizawa's probably turned you off all his worst students. Maybe all his students, period. I, uh, I didn't come here to flirt. Sorry."

Kaminari doesn't know if the apology is to Shinso for being too much, to Shinso for not acting on what he suddenly understands as a crush, or to himself for being the dumbass who falls for one of his best friends. What he does know is that things just got very complicated in his brain and he hates it.

"Anyway... I'll be fine. Get over it soon enough. It's whatever."