#I don't really have anything to add to the discussion that hasn't already been said (and better) on here

[repurposedmeatlocker]

Who is using Y2K nostalgiacore to support CP??? 😭

I cannot name specifics simply because I don't remember. I was just describing a commonality I've noticed with a lot of people on here as someone who enjoys and searches out some of those aesthetic visuals on this site.

This is not a sweeping judgement of people who like those aesthetics (again...I do.) nor am I saying they are USING those themes to indoctrinate people into CP (apologies if my wording in the tag was unclear). Simply I was just adding that I've seen some people who like using those aesthetics and talking about the old internet also tend to use language that leans into red flags common with people that support CP and profic.

[angelofthepage]

Thoughts on the "Updated" Bendy Employee Handbook

Before we go any further, let's make it very clear what kind of post this is: we're not here to hate on the book, and none of anything I'm about to say is said with ill intent. I am here for analysis, constructive criticism, and discussion. This post is a little more critical than what I would usually share, so viewer discretion is advised.

Today we're talking about the newly updated Bendy Employee Handbook, which just recently released as of this month at the time of this post. And I have a lot of questions about this entry, and really, game guides as a whole in our modern gaming world. This book appeared to advertise itself as a rerelease of the original handbook with additional content for Bendy and the Dark Revival, but upon comparing the two, I've noticed there's actually a number of changes they've made, some good, some bad, and some that I'm not sure what to make of. So come and join me under the cut, and if you have some thoughts of your own, feel free to comment or reblog and add to the discussion. Without further ado, here we go!

Part 1: The Baffling Amount of Cut Content

Our story begins where most stories do, the table of contents. So right off the bat, when comparing this book to the original, you'll notice something off.

No, your eyes do not deceive you, an entire section of the original book was cut, on top of making other sections shorter. And the weirdest part? Some of these things were exclusive to that original book, they didn't appear anywhere else in the Bendy franchise. So already we're off to a weird start. Some of these missing pages aren't so bad though. In some cases, they're just format changes to make the book flow a little better/take up less room. Sometimes they succeed in that, sometimes they end up feeling more cramped, it's pretty subjective whether or not this improved the book. But it certainly does cut down on pages. Case in point, the beginning of each chapter of BATIM.

Don't worry, Joey's letter hasn't been cut, but it has been moved to earlier in the book, so it's no longer in Chapter 1. This was a very odd change. Other things that are missing are character monologues, but it's inconsistent. Alice Angel's speech about the screaming well of voices and Joey's monologue right before the final boss were kept, but Sammy's "sheep sheep sheep" speech and Bertrum's audiolog right before his boss fight were inexplicably cut.

Here are a few cuts I found pretty significant.

These pages are all missing from the update. In the case of this newspaper article, what does that mean in regards to whether or not this is "canon" or "retconned"? Joey Drew, did you or did you not have plans to expand into a Bendy themed toothpaste? The people need to know! X''D But seriously, while some of this is inconsequential, some of it matters. The mascot costume in particular, that's the only sketch we get (that I'm assuming came from Bertrum or Joey regarding that part of the parks, no one is specifically credited for making it). It doesn't show up anywhere else in the series (to my knowledge). It's strange that it's just, gone now. The Bendyland spread is such an unfortunate loss, that's some of the closest we've ever gotten to seeing the map of the park. Yes you can see it in BATIM, but being able to get up close and personal with it without having to control Henry was really nice. It makes me wonder if they're trying to erase the past details so they can do more with Bendyland in the future, something that's different from the original vision. I don't think that's it, but it could be, though they'd also have to go back on The Illusion of Living too, given it’s discussed there with some really fun details.

Speaking of which, that's the weirdest piece of cut content: the missing section that ends the old book (that was reiterated in The Illusion of Living). It's Joey Drew's tips for making a cartoon. It's formatted differently and has no images in TIOL, but the basic information is still the same. What's not the same though, is the loss of the tutorial pages for drawing the toons. These are another thing that don’t show up anywhere else in the series, making them a much more permanent loss. And even though this section is cut, it’s still referenced on the back cover of the new book, which is a bit odd.

These were really cute and showed so much personality for not just the toons, but for Joey as he described them. Cutting this was genuinely disappointing for me. Same with the paperwork in Joey's apartment. Those were some of the highest quality images we had of what was on his desk and bulletin board, and I liked being able to see them clearer. The biggest loss of the cut content isn’t just the pages themselves, but the personality they gave to this book, and the Bendy world as a whole. 

This was the very first Bendy book to be released, and therefore our first look into this world in this format. And while I don’t think it’s the greatest thing in the world in terms of being a game guide, I didn’t pick up the original for a game guide. I picked it up because I wanted to see if it provided more context for the world. And when it does that, it does a good job. The memos from characters we know, Joey’s financial records, the images from the desks of people like Joey and Bertrum, they give us insight into how things were going at the studio. Some of my favorite details from the original are Joey’s memo about how Susie was replaced by Allison, and the receipt for Joe’s Fine Dining. The fact that that memo was distributed to everyone but Susie enhanced what we already knew from BATIM, and it paints him as a much crueler character than we knew him to be. Not to mention the repeated use of “I have to say, I’m an instant fan”. Having Joey say those words makes the concept of him creating the cycle so much more interesting. Like did he script out every little action these characters take? Or is this something Susie picked up and recycled from him after potentially finding this memo in real life? Oh there are so many delicious possibilities. And the lunch date, oh my gosh. One, it started my quest to build the Joey Drew menu using all the things he eats in the books, because damn does he have good taste. And two, it was so cool to have a look into an interaction Susie told us about in that one tape. Like that was REALLY GOOD. Give me more like that! When you have other parts of the series back up things we’ve heard only one character say, it gives more credence to the idea that they actually happened that way, or gives us a clue that we need to check for character biases when they tell us their side of the story. And in a series where MOST characters are unreliable narrators, that is REALLY IMPORTANT for establishing timelines and figuring out what’s real versus what’s fabricated. That was my biggest hope for the update, for more flavortext and world building that expands on things we already know. 

But um…the dark revival part of the book doesn’t do that. 

Part 2: The Dark Revival’s Minimal Offerings

After an abrupt jump from Bendyland to BATDR, we get into the new stuff. The Bendy and the Dark Revival section of this book is alarmingly short and has very little substance. There is no new expansion of the worldbuilding or insight into these characters. I mean, the book describes Heidi as being a female lost one? So if you wanted a confirmation on her gender, there you go I guess? I guess that detail was never like, stated explicitly, but this is me stretching to find something new that it gives us. Actually, wait, it does give us one new thing, but I’m gonna be honest, it kind of rubbed me the wrong way.

The book refers to Allison having a “pet wolf” when we get her introduction in Chapter 1. It then later describes that Tom “likes being pet” when we get his introduction in Chapter 5. Which by the way, is the only image of Tom in this entire book, since his original render from the old version was cut. Now, I’ll be honest, I used to like that second detail, I thought it was cute that he doesn’t just tolerate Audrey, he actually LIKES being pet. Those are two different things, having some insights into Tom’s feelings and characterization would have been a breath of fresh air. But no, when I reread the book and saw that first detail, that made that really weird and uncomfortable actually. It would be one thing if in-universe, Tom called himself a pet, or Allison called him that with consent. Heck, if there was another character in-universe who wanted to purposely insult Allison and Tom by saying that, that would be fine too, then it’d be reiterating the narrative. But on its own? I take issue with taking Tom of all characters and calling him her pet. The Safehouse Boris never got treated that badly, hell, Buddy in the books never got dehumanized this badly when he became a Boris. But Tom, Tom gets to be the one that’s dehumanized? There is something that really rubs me the wrong way about that. Especially if he turns out to be Thomas Connor or has some connection to him. I can’t assume if he is or isn’t anymore given all the stuff BATDR pulled with Allison and Henry. But on the chance he IS Thomas Connor, do you have any idea how bad that looks, to have a character that, because of details written in Dreams Come to Life, many fans speculate to be a person of color, referring to him as Allison’s “pet”? And even if he ends up not being a person of color (I say as I groan about the inevitable discourse for the DCTL graphic novel that’s coming out), it’s still kind of awful to say that about anyone. Tom is a character that has repeatedly gotten the short end of the stick in this series. He’s relevant to BATDR for all of a couple of minutes, and he’s incredibly underutilized and lacking details or depth for most of the series. Thomas Connor, he gets a bit of depth as of The Lost Ones, that novel does great things for him. But Tom Wolf? Short end of the stick. And I’m sad to see that continue here. 

The one positive thing I have to say about this section is that it’s really nice to have so many of the audiolog character transcripts here. Most of the notes and logs from BATDR are here with all their words typed out. The ones that in-game had a chiller styled font are transcribed a bit strangely, as now they’re written like the messages written on the walls in-game. But it’s not the worst. If anything, all of this gives me a great resource as a theorist. Having a record of all of these and what chapters they appear in makes my goal of constructing a timeline and cross checking information much easier. 

Though from a graphic design standpoint, these pages frustrate me a little bit. They’re so cramped, and there’s several spots where the text isn’t centered properly within its text block. I get the sense on some parts, it’s because it’s placed so close to the spine of the book, so they don’t want any information getting cut off, but it still looks funky. And there are several spots where that explanation doesn’t really apply. There’s also some weird placement of fun facts. While I love that this book lets us in on some secrets, they’re not always placed in an area that makes sense? Like, there’s a note about how to get the Inkjets Concert, but the steps for how to get it are placed way after a point in the narrative where you’d be able to get it, and I’m kind of scratching my head as to why it was done that way. Is it to encourage a second playthrough? Or is it to not spoil the story? Why not split the information up? Or have a dedicated secrets page like they do with the achievements and theMeatly’s cutouts? 

Though speaking of not spoiling things, this book is really odd about what it chooses to focus on. So, Henry’s model is in this book, right next to a passage about a “mysterious man” you can meet in the Cyclebreakers area. They showed his model but didn’t name him as Henry? I don’t quite get that choice. Also, despite the cyclebreakers being very important to this story, they aren’t really mentioned before this very brief section. However, Porter? The character shown for all of a few seconds? He’s got at least three images throughout this book. The balance feels off with what this book chooses to put emphasis on. 

Also, this one really annoyed me: Allison. So for everyone who’s actually played BATIM, you would know that Allison Angel is never referred to as Allison within BATIM. We only know she’s called that because people dove into the game’s files and revealed her and Tom’s names upon the release of Chapter 4. And the book follows suit with this, it does not call her Allison in the original handbook whatsoever. HOWEVER, the BATDR section messes this up. When it introduces her, even though in-game she introduces herself as Alice, the book introduces her as Allison. But when we get to Chapter 5, the part where she’s actually named Allison by Audrey, it suddenly switches to calling her Nice Alice? It’s a weird choice and I don’t understand why this happened. 

It leaves me wondering just how much the new author of this section and their editors know about the Bendy series before going into this project. What context were they given to write this thing? It makes the book feel unpolished to have so many mistakes in its formatting and information. I don’t know what the quality control team for this release looked like, but a part of me wonders how many editors this went through before making it to the final release. I don’t work in publishing to know what that looks like, but I’d genuinely love to learn more on this subject, it’s fascinating. 

There’s also a very strong dissonance in the imagery. While I’m glad to see the renders from BATDR’s advertising so clearly and up close, the difference in their coloring looks strange when put next to the rest of Bendy’s usual color palette. It leaves me wondering what assets the book team was given for use in this release. There’s a lot I could say here about the importance of press kits and brand guidelines, especially in this day and age when so many fans are making just as high quality of content as the official releases of media. And that leads me to the most disappointing part of this book. 

Part 3: Stolen Content

If you’re active in the Bendy fandom and know its many creative members, then you may already know what I’m about to dive into. MLSpence3D is an artist that enjoys 3D modeling, rigging, animating, and rendering. He can often be found engaging in all sorts of corners in the indie mascot horror community, such as playing a notable role in the production of SuperHorrorBro’s upcoming title, Glitched Out, as well as providing the renders used on the Bendy Wiki of the in-game characters. Spence has had his work mistaken for official renders before, and unfortunately, it’s not just fans making that mistake. The render of the Piper used in the BATIM portion of the original handbook is Spence’s, and it unfortunately hasn’t been removed in this update, nor has he been credited or asked for permission to have it used here. I’ll admit, his stuff looks so official that I’ve mistaken it as such too, and it speaks to a much needed conversation on assets, metadata, and protection for artists of all mediums. 

Our fandom is not the only place where this happens. Back when FNAF: Help Wanted was in production, the cover art mistakenly used fan renders as a part of its photomanipulation. Developer Scott Cawthon was quick to apologize and make things right, removing the renders and replacing them with officially made FNAF models. Heck, we had something similar happen right here with Bendy back when the voice cast of BATDR started working with Streamily. The initial post that advertised their Streamily debut used renders from Spence and a few other artists that had to be tracked down, and they didn’t have the rights to use them, nor were they credited. It makes a lot of sense that this happens, when you don’t have sufficient resources and aren’t an active member of the fandom, if you’re a graphic designer trying to make a piece to advertise something, you’re going to need assets to make that. And if you’re not given sufficient assets by the people you’re designing for, you turn to other sources to get the job done. They may not know what on Google is official vs fan content. The fans are so skilled and passionate about what they do, and with the number of series that have fans steadily joining the official teams, it’s incredible what can result from being passionate. But it also makes for a much needed reminder to add metadata to your files so that they can be traced back as belonging to you. Watermark your stuff, clearly mark your work as fan content in the tags, captions, and descriptions, in an effort to protect yourself. Don’t use images you find online unless you have a very clear idea of where they came from, so you can direct people back to the source when they ask about it (or better yet, link the source in your description from the start). Give people another reason to pause and double check their work in the chain of command (they should be pausing to double check anyway, but let's be real, we don't live in a perfect world). In a world where credit and sources are more important than ever, remembering to give credit where it’s due from the start will save you all kinds of headaches in the future. Video game developers, especially those of you in the indie scene: please develop press kits to give to people your teams collaborate with. By giving them assets they can reliably use to advertise for you, you will save everyone a lot of hassle in the long run. And if this is still happening even with a press kit, it merits having some conversations to evaluate why and solve the problem. If there is no other takeaway anyone gets from this post, this is the big one I want to see some positive change on in the future.

Part 4: The Functionality as a Game Guide

This book works for your first time through BATDR, but not for any kind of sequential playthroughs. The way it directs you through the game uses the audiologs and notes as waypoints. Once you pick them up, they are removed from the environment, and so if you’re picking up the game after a long time away from it, you’re not gonna remember where those were, so it’s likely not going to be useful for navigating. It reminds me a lot of the way my parents talked about one of our old hometowns. We lived in Vermont for a little while, and there were two things about our area that we laughed about. One, never leave your car unlocked unless you want it filled with zucchini. Two, if you ask for directions, you’re not gonna have a clue unless you’re a local, because they word everything in a similar fashion to “you’re gonna drive past where the old barn used to be”. At least give me a landmark that still exists, or a map! The BATIM chapters aren’t much better, they sort of give you a layout map, but it’s not helpful. Especially in Chapter 3, the place where you arguably need a map the most, there is no kind of instruction for how to get through Alice’s fetch quests if you get lost. 

In my mind, a game guide is something you turn to when you need help getting through a game. Now, mind you, I am not the target audience for a game guide. I don’t own game guides. There are a few in my household that my siblings own, for stuff like Super Mario Sunshine, and I guess technically my Pokedex for Pokemon Black and White 2 DOES double as a game guide. But like, we now live in the age of the internet. If you want to know how to get through something, there are a million articles and Let’s Plays that detail how to complete the base story, find secrets, and even suggest strategies for tackling difficult challenges. Some of these are designed to be informative, and some are more reactionary and built for entertainment, there’s lots of flavors to choose from! 

And it makes me wonder, what does that mean for the medium of game guides as a whole? I think they still have their place. For one thing, different people benefit from different learning styles. Being able to read a guide may work better for someone than a video depending on their brain wiring. And for people who don’t have reliable or frankly any internet, or rely on a library for that, it’s nice to have a book so that you don’t have to wait to keep playing. I’ve never seen anyone get a game guide from a library, but I absolutely think it’s something a library could have. It’s also just really convenient to have all of that information available in one book, as opposed to having to search through multiple forums and sources and risk getting spoiled. And when they’re done well, sometimes they can have secrets not even the existing player base knew. Like I knew that there was this secret about a ghost train that appears if you set your system’s clock to 4:14, but I didn’t know if AM or PM mattered. Thanks to this book, now I know that it doesn’t matter, both work, which is really handy to know! But uh…most of the secrets that were revealed in this book were things I knew within the first month that BATDR came out. None of them were new to me as someone who’s plugged into the world of Bendy. There have been multiple videos detailing how to get these secrets, and how to play this game, by many different indie horror enthusiasts. It almost makes it feel like this book came out a bit too late, and it’s only released about a year or so after this game came out.

Which really begs the question, who was the target audience for this book? Was it for new fans who were struggling with these games? Was it for longtime fans who wanted a memento of the occasion and a record of all the stuff in these games? Was it for lore hunters hungry for new secrets and world building? Having read both versions of the employee handbook, I still can’t definitively say who the target audience is. That kind of frustrates me, that’s the first thing they taught us about back when I went to school for graphic design. It’s important to keep your audience in mind when designing something, that way it caters to their needs, appeals to them, and gets your message across effectively. 

Part 5: Final Thoughts

I still can’t say for sure what I was supposed to get out of this.The parts of it that I found charming and appealing were not continued or built upon in this update. There is no new world building or lore. It doesn’t do an effective job as a game guide given its reliance on non-permanent elements of gameplay. It doesn’t give us tools to cross reference what we know from previous entries, nor does it expand upon details that lacked clarity within BATDR or BATIM. It removed some of its more charming content, and it still has stolen artwork from its previous iteration. By the time I got done reading this book, I was left feeling disappointed and kind of exhausted. No joke, I grabbed a friend, and we went through it all to compare it page by page to see what changed. It was something you could make a drinking game out of, not that I would recommend that. 

I would struggle to recommend this book to any Bendy fan, unless you’re a completionist like me who wants to own every book as a physical copy. The original employee handbook was a far better read, and if you can find a copy secondhand or at your local library, you’re in for a small but tasty treat (quite literally if you decide to make the bacon soup recipe, which fun fact, originated in this book and was developed by the wife of Bookpast, one of the writers on this series!). The Dark Revival section feels tacked on and not as well thought out as the original book was. There is a very odd disconnect between the two. I’m genuinely confused as to why it was put in a rerelease of this book rather than making an entirely new book for Dark Revival. Dark Revival is a much longer and detailed game than Bendy and the Ink Machine. I would expect a book that describes how to play it and its world building to take up a lot more pages and go in depth on different details than this one did. So why was it done this way? Does this have to do with some sort of contract with Scholastic that we don’t know about? Was there a time constraint, or a page count that had to be met that they couldn’t meet with just BATDR? Did the people working on Bendy have too much on their plates to dedicate the time to a new book? What happened here? I wasn’t expecting to leave this book with more questions than answers, but here we are. 

Overall, I don’t think it was worth what I paid for it, but it’s going to live on my shelf with the rest of my books. This will be handy for when I need to reference the audiologs and don’t want to look up a YouTube video to remember what was said. It’ll also be nice if I’m traveling. See, whenever I visit my grandparents, their wifi is pretty limited, so if I want to draw anything while I’m up there, I have to print out references or download images on my phone before I go so I can do that. Having some of the new renders in this book will be useful if I decide I want to draw Bendy stuff or theorize while on the road. 

Now it's your turn. Tell me your thoughts on the Updated Edition of the Bendy Employee Handbook! Is this something you want to read? If you have read it, did you enjoy it? Were you left wanting more? If we ever get another book like this, what sort of things would you like to see? Let's talk about it. And remember, if you did enjoy it, that's not a bad thing, absolutely no judgement there. Just because it wasn't for me doesn't mean it's not going to be enjoyable for someone else. Every work of fiction has its audience. <3 Here's wishing you a wonderful rest of the day, and happy reading!

[makeitmingi]

Cause Baby You're My Muse [Chapter 30]

Genre: Romance, Idol!AU, Music, Slight angst

Pairing: Mingi x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Producer!Reader, IdolLyricist!Mingi, IdolProducer!Hongjoong, Idol!Seonghwa, Idol!Yunho, Idol!Wooyoung, Idol!San, Idol!Yeosang, Idol!Jongho, cameo(s) by other celebrities

Summary: You always preferred producing underground, having an unknown face and governed by your own rules. But when you start freelancing for idol groups, you say goodbye to your lone wolf lifestyle as you learn to work with idol producers and lyricists.

Word count: 3.3K

Just like you and Mingi predicted, you were so busy that you haven't really spent any time with him over the next couple of weeks. What made you feel worse was not being able to see Haneul.

You started early or worked through the night that having Haneul around would just not be fair to her. You wouldn't be able to give your attention to her and care for her, which is why she still doesn't live with you.

"Mingi hyung, are you okay?" Jongho asked, noticing the taller male unusually quiet, a distant look on his face.

"I'm worried about Indigo... You know she had just been cooped up in her studio. I've been busy too so I haven't gone to visit her and check if she's okay." Mingi sighed.

"It's normal when it's comeback preparation season for producers. Hongjoong hyung hasn't been coming home too." Jongho said.

"Her studio is just downstairs, buddy. You can ask her." Yunho patted Mingi on the shoulder.

"No... I don't want to disturb her. She's stresesd out as is..." Mingi chewed on his bottom lip. He groaned, falling back to lay on the practice room floor. He missed you so much.

"I'm sure you won't stress her." Yunho chuckled.

"It's not me that will stress her. It's the thought of me that will stress her out. I know her, she'll see me and feel bad for not spending time with me. I don't want to add to that. If she thinks we're both busy that we can't spend time with each other, it'll make her feel less guilty." Mingi explained.

"Wow." Jongho snorted with a smile. Even Yunho blinked, speechless at how Mingi was so confident in his knowledge of you.

Mingi didn't even know your schedule, he just knew you were busy. The both of you decided not to share a calendar and overwhelm or worry the other party.

"Maybe you can cook her a meal, lighten that load." Wooyoung joined the discussion circle.

"My omma has been giving me food to give to her." Mingi said flatly. He remembers the shock, thinking the food was for him but his mother warned him not to eat it, saying it was for you only.

"I would suggest we all surprise her but with Mingi's whole insight into Indigo's psyche earlier, I'm not sure if that will go well."

"You guys think of something. I'll just buy her a coffee and get it delivered to her studio first." Mingi pushed himself to stand up, going to retrieve his phone. He ordered two iced coffees from the cafe you liked and got it delivered to your studio.

'Thanks for the coffee, Mings... I really needed it. Are you in the studio today? - Prod. Baby'

'Yeah. Actually I'm already in the building, we just finished dance practice. - Mings'

'Can you come? - Prod. Baby'

"That's my queue. I'll see you guys later." Mingi slung his bag over his shoulder and left the dance studio. Before going to you, he went to the bathroom to change out of his hoodie and into a clean shirt.

DING DONG

Mingi stood there, waiting for you to open the door. Not that you didn't tell him your studio password or anything, he simply didn't want to know it when you offered to tell him. That was your private space, not his, and if he was going to be inside, you should be there with him.

"Mings." A smile appeared on your face as you opened the door and took him in. Mingi dropped his bag, immediately leaning down to scoop you into his arms.

"I missed you." You said, muffled into his shoulder as your arms tightened around his neck.

"Me too." He mumbled, rubbing his face into your neck. He took a deep breath, inhaling your familiar scent and relaxed in your hold.

Like always, Mingi didn't let you go. Instead, he teetered into the studio, closing the door behind him. He didn't care that his bag was left in the hallway.

"You left your bag out there, silly." You giggled.

"It's fine. There's nothing good to steal in there." Mingi said. You shook your head with a laugh, leaning in to give him a quick peck. After that, you went to get his bag from outside, closing the door and locking the door after that.

"Baby, have you been sleeping here again?" Mingi asked, finally noticing the set up pull out bed. You hadn't bothered to tidy it up since you were using it for night sleeps and naps.

That was when Mingi took in your appearance as well. You looked tired, pale with sunken eyes. You also felt lighter when Mingi lifted you up.

"Only for the past two nights." You confessed. Mingi didn't lecture you or scold you.

"Poor, baby." He hugged you.

"That's fine. I just needed to see you. I'm already feeling much better after seeing you." You wrapped your arms around his waist, sticking yourself to him like a baby koala.

"Let's take a nap, hmm? I'll wake you up when you want me to." Mingi suggested kindly. That sounded really tempting, sleeping with Mingi beside you, holding you. Looking back at your desk, you thought about all the work you have been doing. Maybe you could afford a 1-hour nap or even 2-hours.

"Okay. Wake me up in 2 hours." You told him. Mingi nodded, setting the alarm on his phone. You dimmed the lights as you both settled on the pull out bed.

"It's not as comfortable as home." You chuckled, feeling the springs move easily under you.

"That's okay. It's better than nothing." He smiled, happy to just be with you. One arm was tucked under your head, becoming your pillow and his other arm draped over your waist loosely.

"Before you sleep..." Mingi started. You hummed in question.

"This." He pressed his lips against yours. You smiled into the kiss, hands coming up to hold his cheeks. You felt Mingi squeeze the flesh of your waist.

"Okay, now you can sleep." He said, pulling away. You laughed at how silly he was as you tucked your face into the crook of his neck.

You fell asleep in record time, forgetting where you were temporarily. The previous two weeks of barely getting any sleep caught up with you so quickly. All that mattered was that Mingi was here with you and you were in safe in his arms.

"Baby? Love? It's time to wake up." Of course Mingi didn't want to wake you up but he promised he would and he didn't want you to be upset that you slept for so long.

"Hmm..." You groaned, clutching onto Mingi's shirt.

"You can sleep longer if you want. I just don't want you to be mad at me if I didn't wake you up first." He said.

"Not... mad... You smell... good...." You mumbled out with your face still smushed against Mingi's bicep. He laughed, his free hand coming up to thread through your hair.

"Thanks?"

"You're welcome..." You replied. You were obviously half asleep, not really aware of the conversation you were having with Mingi.

"Need to... work... But I don't want... to move..." You grumbled with your eyes still closed. Mingi wanted to carry you up and take you home to continue sleeping in a proper bed. He showered you in kisses until you scrunched your nose and peeked open an eye to stare at him.

"Oh, we're still in the studio." You yawned, stretching your arms over your head as you blinked, taking in your surroundings. You had forgotten that you were here.

"Up we go." Mingi helped you sit up and you rubbed the sleep out of your eyes.

"Go work. I'll clear all this up." Mingi patted your lower back to urge you to move, tossing the pillows aside.

"Mmm, okay." You hummed and shuffled over to sit in your chair. Mingi tidied up the bed, he folded the blanket and placed it into the basket you had before making everything look like a couch again.

"All done." He came over and leaned down to give you a kiss on the cheek. You turned to see everything put away neatly.

"Thank you." You tilted your head up to give him a peck. You reached over to take a sip of your coffee before going back to work. Mingi sat on the couch, not wanting to disturb or distract you. He had his phone out, writing some lyrics.

"Mings, aren't you tired from practice? You don't have to wait for me to finish. You could go home if you'd like." You said to him, not taking your eyes off the screen in front of you.

"No, I'm okay. I know I don't have to wait, I want to. But if you want the space to think alone, I'm fine too." Mingi replied.

"No, I do want you here." You turned around to look at him.

"Even if you aren't right next to me, knowing you're there with me makes me feel less anxious. I can't describe it. It's almost like you have a calming effect on me." You explained.

"Don't worry, I understand because I feel the same when you're with me too." Mingi chuckled.

"Really?" You tilted your head. He nodded in confirmation.

You smiled softly then turned back to do your work. Sure, you joke about how Mingi can be distracting when you're trying to work but you never actually minded him being around you. It was true, he had that effect on you. You didn't feel stressed, anxious or overwhelmed by all the work.

After working for some time, Mingi noticed that it was time for dinner. He was going to order some takeout for the both of you when a text came in from Wooyoung.

'Bring Indigo upstairs to the roof! - Wooyoung'

'But she's busy... - Mingi'

'Tell her Seonghwa hyung and Hongjoong hyung told her to go. She'll agree. - Wooyoung'

"Hey, baby? Sorry to interrupt." Mingi approached you carefully, gently tapping your shoulder so as to not startle you. You removed your headphones and looked at him quizically.

"The captain and Seonghwa hyung asked me to bring you upstairs." Mingi explained.

"Why?" You tilted your head.

"Not sure... I was just told to bring you." He scratched his head. True to what Wooyoung predicted, you put your headphones down and saved your progress before heading up with him. Since it was late, Mingi boldly held your hand the entire way.

"What-"

"Surprise!" The roof top was decked out with lanterns and fairy lights. Seonghwa and Wooyoung were standing over a big pot of some sorts, stirring what looked to be soup.

"Unnie!" Haneul wiggled in San's arms. He let her down and she ran to you. You bent down to hug her tightly.

"Haneulie, I missed you so much." You whispered as you showered her in kisses. She burst into a fit of giggles from the tickles.

"Did you plan this?" You turned to Mingi.

"Nope! It was the rest of us." Hongjoong slung an arm around your shoulder, leading you away. Haneul held onto your free hand, an excited, giddy smile on her face. You went to give Wooyoung, Yeosang and Seonghwa thank you hugs. Despite not being on for skinship, Jongho let you hug him.

"Thank you for driving to get Haneul." You hugged Yunho. He smiled brightly, happily hugging you. He even lifted you up a little like Mingi usually does with you.

"Me too! Me too! I went along." San snatched you away to hug you.

"Yah, that's enough." Mingi voiced. Haneul let go of your hand and ran to him to hug his leg.

"Hi there, little princess." He smiled and bent down to hold Haneul. She always liked when Yunho or Mingi held her because she felt so tall. Haneul giggled and wrapped her arms around Mingi.

"Hi, big princess!" She kicked her legs slightly with happiness. Mingi blinked at the nickname she just called him.

"But I'm not a princess?"

"You are! Yunho oppa said so!" Haneul pointed to the other tall male, who was snickering. Mingi shot his best friend a flat look. Of course it would originate from him.

"Okay, no more giant princess. Come here, little bear." Jongho cut in and took Haneul away. Haneul willingly sat in Jongho's lap as they looked out the balcony at the cars and people walking by. You softened watching the two of them.

"Mine." You jumped at Mingi's sudden appearance behind you. He draped his arms over your shoulders from the back.

"Alright, alright. Time to eat kids." Seonghwa called. After Yeosang handed you a drink, Wooyoung came and stole you from Mingi, sitting you beside him.

"Yah, Jung Wooyoung!" Mingi yelled in protest.

"We made Baeksuk. For you to replenish your energy." Wooyoung ignored Mingi and spoke to you excitedly. Hongjoong, San and Yunho helped given out the bowls of hot chicken soup to everyone.

"Wait, wait. I need to help Haneul cut up the meat." You chuckled, standing back up.

"Don't worry, Indigo. I got it. Just sit and enjoy your dinner." Jongho assured. He used his chopsticks to pick off the meat and shredded it into small pieces for Haneul, mixing it with her rice.

"Thanks, Jongho ah." You smiled softly, melting at how Jongho was with Haneul. They have grown close even if he wouldn't verbally admit it. You sat back down beside Wooyoung and Yeosang. Mingi's face fell as he sulked, he had hoped that you would still change seats to sit with him.

"Thank you for the surprise, everyone. For bringing Haneul here and cooking. Although, I'm curious how you all got such a big pot." You giggled, raising your soda can.

"We rented it. You can do that, surprisingly. But you're welcome, we hope you have all the energy after this." Seonghwa smiled.

"I will." You looked at all of them. It won't be the food that gave you energy but everyone seated here with you.

"Is it good, little bear?" Jongho asked.

"Mhmm!" Haneul said, shovelling the food into her mouth. Jongho laughed and wiped her mouth with a napkin. He added more seaweed into her bowl to mix with the rice and chicken.

"Here, let me help you." San wore two layers of gloves and helped you tear apart the chicken, putting one of the legs in your bowl.

"Thank you, Sannie." You dipped the chicken and ate it with the radish kimchi. It tasted very good, just the comforting meal you needed. What made it taste better was the fact that the Ateez boys put in effort to cook it for you.

"We know you're busy tomorrow but if it's okay with you, we would like to take Haneul to the aquarium?" Yunho asked softly. Your hand stopped in its movement.

"But if you're not comfortable, we won't." Yeosang quickly added, having noticed how you stiffened.

"It's nothing to do with you guys. It's not that I don't trust you with her..." You bit the inside of your cheek, trying to explain yourself.

"It's just... I have to think of her safety. What if the media or fans know that you're there? I don't want her face planted all over the news." You sighed.

"It's okay to be honest and worried about her safety, Indigo. We completely understand and don't take offense to that at all. We actually called and the aquarium is willing to open late for us to visit in the morning before they open the public. If you're fine with that." Wooyoung explained.

"If it's just going to be you guys and her, I don't mind. But are you sure you guys have the time to take her?" You asked.

"Yeah. Jongho, Yunho, Wooyoung and I will be there. We'll go and have lunch before coming back." Yeosang said.

"Okay then. You guys should be the ones to tell her. I'm sure she will be happy to hear it from you." You gave a little smile, watching as the boys told Haneul their plan tomorrow.

"Really?!" Her eyes lit up.

"Yeah, baby. But I won't be able to go because I have work. You'll go with the oppas, okay?" You told her. She nodded excitedly.

"Yay! Aquarium!" She cheered. Jongho mimicked her, throwing his hands up in celebration as well.

After the meal, you all helped clean up before going home. You figured you could skip a night of work since you didn't want Haneul to wait for you in your studio. She sat on the couch, waiting patiently for you to pack up.

"Princess oppa is coming home with us?" Haneul tilted her head, looking at Mingi who sat beside her. All the others had gone on their own way, back to shared dorm.

"Yeah..." You stopped, realising that you still haven't told her about you and Mingi.

"Why?" She asked.

"Well... Because..." Mingi tried to help but it ended up failing, not able to come up with an excuse to tell the child. He looked at you for help. You laughed at his helpless expression.

"How should I say this? Baby, Mingi has become my... partner. So he stayed over with me from time to time." You explained.

"Like how an omma and appa are?"

"N-No. We're not married. This is like that stage before they get married?" You scratched your head, unable to really explain to her the concept of dating. But Haneul seemed to accept it, nodding her head. Mingi, on the other hand, was reeling from the fact that you described your relationship as the step before marriage.

"I'm ready. Shall we go home?" You asked. Mingi shook his head to clear his head. He wordlessly came to take your bag for you, slinging it over his own shoulder.

"Let's go!" Haneul jumped down from the couch and held your hand. You smiled down at her.

"I'll call a cab." Mingi said.

You and Mingi pulled up your masks before you entered the cab. Haneul sat on your lap and you wrapped your arms around her, resting your head against her.

"Comfy?" You chuckled. She nodded with a hum. She reached up and toyed with your earrings, something she did since she was a baby. You guessed that she must have been tired because she ended up with her falling asleep.

"Hang on, let me help you." When the cab stopped, Mingi put the bag on the ground and came to your side. You very carefully moved Haneul into Mingi's arms.

"Your husband is very kind." The taxi driver complimented as you handed him the money.

"Thank you. Goodnight, ahjusshi." You didn't bother to correct him. You got out of the cab and carried the bags.

"Don't worry, I got it." You assured Mingi. He nodded, adjusting Haneul so she would be more comfortable. The two of you went up to the apartment.

"Why don't you shower first? I'll change Haneul's clothes." You asked. Mingi nodded and leaned in to give you a sweet kiss before going to the bathroom. You grabbed a towel to wipe Haneul's face, arms and legs then changed her into her pajamas. She must have been tired because she didn't even stir when you moved her.

"Goodnight, baby." You kissed her cheek, tucking her in.

"I'll sleep on the couch tonight." Mingi said when you passed him to go shower, holding your hand.

"No... We haven't spent time in two weeks... There is more than enough space in the bed. That is, if you don't mind sharing the bed with Haneul and I." You said.

"You sure?" He kissed the back of your hand.

"Yeah. With the way we cuddle, we only take up half the bed anyway." You chuckled. Mingi softened, wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you in. He had really missed you so much. Holding your chin, he tilted your head up so he could press his lips against yours.

~

Series Masterlist

[kerrikins]

Jin and the video

Or, a plot-line I think the writers may have misjudged.

In the most recent episode, we had Jin confessing to Phee that he posted the video. To most this was validation of what they already believed, to others it was confusing as there have been some contradicting clips that show Jin with a computer that was a different colour, as well as the screen flipping back and forth from night and day mode.

While this debate still continues a bit, particularly since we already knew that Jin probably thinks he must have posted it, I think the renewed reaction has cemented for me my thoughts that I think that this is a plotline the writers misjudged.

See I still - at least at this point, with the caveat that I could be proven wrong as this is horror/thriller - believe that Jin is intended to be a character that people can somewhat empathize with. He's not like Top, Por, or Tee, who are shown to be cruel and dismissive to Non. Though people deny it and talk around it, Jin is the one character that showed empathy to Non, he stood up for him, etc.

But the audience mostly doesn't empathize with Jin at all, and I think this is because the writers miscalculated.

People were already frustrated with his character even before the video incident, but the video really pushed it over the top and now Jin is the most despised character on the show.

However, I'm not sure whether the writers actually anticipated this reaction properly. The way that the show has handled it makes it seem like they haven't, because the video hasn't been touched on all that much, at least not to the extent I might have expected if the intention was 'yes, this is the worst thing done in the show, Jin is the villain who you should all hate and want to die'. We have other characters fitting that bill - Tee's uncle, Top, even Por to some extent.

Yes, the video has been mentioned, but only briefly. It doesn't hold the weight in the discussions about what happened to Non that I would expect it to if I thought the writers felt that this was the worst of the worst in the story they're constructing. (Again, it's possible that something will happen in the next two episodes that will counter this.)

And then there's the fact that people are still questioning whether or not Jin posted the video, given the different colour computers and different colour scheme. Personally I'm inclined to just go with what Jin said at this point, but at this point that's mostly because I feel like it's not going to matter.

I don't want a reveal because it's not going to make a difference. It's not something I have any excitement for, though I originally did, and it's because I know that for most viewers it's not going to land, it's not going to have the intended impact. Reveals usually are supposed to have an effect on the emotion of the audience, to make them view a character a different way, or perhaps empathize with them (or hate them more).

Though I will briefly add that of course it's possible that (if this is included) the writers anticipated this and are thinking more about the impact to the character who would be at fault, which is certainly a possibility. But if they have any intention at all for it to be a change in how the viewer looks at Jin, it's not going to land. Most fans aren't going to care, they aren't going to change their minds.

The only acceptable ending to most at this point is for Jin to die.

So with that in mind I think that the writers made a mistake with this plotline IF their intention is to write Jin as a character the audience could empathize with, because most do not. He's not coming across as grey, he's not coming across as someone people can understand or empathize with.

The act of filming and/or posting the video is, for the audience, making Jin the ultimate villain and if the show gives them anything other than validation of this thought, they are going to be unhappy.

Time will tell.

[hardly---working]

A Review of The Colour of Magic

I really should've read this book a long time ago.

I'm sure I started a way back, when I was still stuck in a sort of fugue state and couldn't begin to appreciate the book before tiring myself out completely.

There's not much to say that hasn't already been elucidated on in countless reviews and essays, and I'm likely not going to add anything to the conversation. For now, I'll only be discussing one idea I found interesting.

Though the book is undoubtedly set in a Fantasy world, with magic, elves and dragons, much of its narrative comes from Science Fiction. Magic is treated as more of a technology. For the most part, in Discworld it's far more simple to just do the action required instead of learning how to perform it in an extraordinarily convoluted way which requires years of study. It certainly has an impact on the world, those who know magic are typically far better than those who don't, but it's just another tool that one can use to improve themselves.

One interesting parable I found was with nuclear technology. In about the middle part of the book, magic is said to be indestructible. Once created, and written in a spellbook it is there for the end of time. Some try to toss spellbooks over the disc, where they have a chance to fall into other worlds, and others into the deepest oceans, where they can undoubtedly resurface. This ties in well with the horror of nuclear weaponry, another immortal force promising untold violence. I was thrilled to find out, shortly after reading the prior section, that my initial impression wasn't as foolish as I thought. When Rincewind, a wizard who only knows one spell with the potential to cause immense suffering, is brought through a time-space paradox to The Present, he is shown to be none other than a specialist in nuclear reactors.

I'm sure there's more comparisons to be made of how the mysterious force of magic is related to the inscrutable nature of modernization, and I can't wait to read the rest of the series, and re-read them all a few times, to find out more.

[yuseirra]

I decided to relisten to Mephisto and something clicked, atleast a theory.

I agree that he wishes for someone to outshine Ai, part of me wonders if the reason why the wish seemingly didn't come true is because it had to do with the twins. They were reincarnated to pursue their dreams, but maybe also for Hikaru's wish that hasn't happened yet.

Ruby is stated so many times she's not Ai in the manga. its like they, Hikaru and Nino, expect an exact replica of her. Ruby is indeed way more emotional and shares more commonality with her father, especially in terms of mentality in how they love in their obsession/possession. But, people flash that she gives off the aura like Ai, looks like Ai at times when she is not trying.

Maybe thats why Hikaru looked hopeful for a moment, the white hoshigan. He saw potential for a split second.

But I could also be very off the mark or its too simple.

We have the HKAI explanation, but we still need Nino's motive for being involved in this. Many speculate that they want to snuff the light that is outshining Ai, which I can believe but I think there is possibly more to it. I apologize if I repeated anything you analyzed ^^

Okay, I think I get what you mean! I've been staring at this ask a little, I don't think it's written in a way that's hard to comprehend, but for some reason, it's taking me longer than it's supposed to.

so, what you mean is that 1. hikaru's wish (has to do with finding someone that outshines Ai) could have been hindered due to the twin's existence (for reasons unknown for now)

and 2. that they want Ruby to be an exact replica of Ai so that she can replace her? That's why you think he looked hopeful?

Mhm, could be! I was trying to coin how those thoughts could relate to Mephisto's lyrics earlier but it's your thoughts from the manga, right?

I wish I had more to bring to the table on my end regarding these ideas, but I don't consider myself a theorist in general. While I come up with some sometimes when I see some plot points that spark my interests, I could only talk about the things I'm really invested and passionate about. I usually just follow the plot for all the other things, so I'm probably not the best person to send an analysis to if you wish for a discussion. All I could say for now for these at the moment is "Oh, interesting! Could be so!".. I don't have so much to add on.

you must have read one of my posts earlier, right? I was so EXCITED when I wrote those! You can always come up with different ideas compared to mine, too~ I'm just really hyped from the possibility of having picked up something I previously haven't! Hope you have a nice day~

+Oh and about nino.. I was thinking maybe kamiki and her share the same goal or if he needs her help with it. if he wants to revive Ai.. which I think is a possibility with the songs expressing that sort of desire, nino must also have some guilt for having said harsh things to Ai. Didn't nino tell Ai to just die already? Then she could feel a responsibility for Ai's death too, no? If Kamiki is working to bring Ai back, I think she'd also support that sort of wish. Murdering the stars doesn't seem like the end goal.. it doesn't really accomplish anything or make things better. I say they're working for something more "constructive". If someone wants Ai back no matter what extreme measures there is to take, I bet it'd be Kamiki and Nino.

[bravevolunteer]

GET  TO  KNOW  THE  MUN.

WHAT  MADE  YOU  PICK  UP  THE  MUSE  YOU  HAVE  ?   well you see i liked fnaf and its lore a normal amount until one night after security breach boosted the fandom i thought a little bit Too Hard while staring at the ceiling and decided to add michael afton the next day-

IS  THERE  ANYTHING  YOU  DON'T  LIKE  TO  WRITE  ?  aside from the obvious? in spite of writing a marvel character for years straight i also suck at constant action with nothing else going on (aside from figuring out how to phrase it i really struggle knowing how far to go in those kinds of replies without overstepping what the other muse would do if that makes sense), which is great because for as much as michael gets into fights he is Just A Guy. and uh... for michael specifically, given the ambiguity of fnaf, there are some ideas that i'm not on board with because they don't align with how i see the story you know?

IS  THERE  ANYTHING  YOU  REALLY  ENJOY  WRITING  ?   angst and hurt/comfort sorry i am a predictable bitch i'll eat it up every single time. the softness hits harder when it comes with or after excruciating pain

HOW  DO  YOU  COME  UP  WITH  YOUR  HEADCANONS  ?  possession yeah. i can't force them they just occur to me in sudden visions. who said that.

DO  YOU  WRITE  IN  SILENCE  OR  LISTEN  TO  MUSIC  ?   music always i CANNOT write in silence, i barely Exist in silence. usually i'll use a character playlist (stupid amount of michael ones), however if it's overstimulating and makes writing more difficult i'll loop specific songs that set the mood but i can tune out for the most part

DO  YOU  PLAN  YOUR  REPLIES  OR  WING  THEM  ?   somewhere in between? i definitely like to plot things out, ESPECIALLY with michael, however i prefer plotting that leans closer towards discussing overall dynamics or the general vibe/direction of a thread. i will not hesitate to go super in depth there. while i rotate them in my head constantly before i write the reply, i tend not to go too far discussing a Hyper Specific prompt though because then i'll avoid writing it (both because i've already discussed it so much and i end up hyping it up to the point where i've set impossible standards)

DO  YOU  ENJOY  SHIPPING  ?   yes :) all kinds :)

WHAT'S  YOUR  ALIAS/NAME  ?   ash which is just. my name. real nickname. it's not that interesting of a story DKFHFJDS however if i were to start going by an alias online my favorite option has always been atlas

AGE  ?   21

BIRTHDAY  ?  october 17

FAVORITE  COLOR  ?   always changes because something's wrong with me. been a sage green enjoyer lately like the gay person i am ( but most of my clothes are black )

FAVORITE  SONG  ?   soooo many so you're getting my 2023 winners: song was not strong enough boygenius but my favorite Album was unreal unearth

LAST  MOVIE  YOU  WATCHED  ?   humiliatingly enough i. Think it was the fnaf movie ( at 3am on call while going insane ) i don't think i've watched one since then

LAST  SHOW  YOU  WATCHED  ?   oh god my brain hasn't been letting me watch anything new lately but i THINK it was trying to watch infinity train and then giving up because of that lmao. if podcasts count i'm relistening to tma-

LAST  SONG  YOU  LISTENED  TO  ?  ... once more to see you mitski

FAVORITE  SEASON  ?   autumn

DO  YOU  HAVE  A  TUMBLR  BEST  FRIEND  ?   i have so many beloved close friends i've met on tumblr i can't just list ONE

tagged by: @mischiiefs tagging: yea mak you stole a good chunk of the crew just steal it from me idk DHJFSJDF

[salarta]

I said in another recent post how people on CBR being too focused on what Lorna wears and who she fucks kept me from really digging into meaningful topics for Lorna with her upcoming Fall of the House of X moment. I feel like delving a little more into the core issue of that matter.

There's nothing inherently wrong with either topic in isolation. Both topics can take things in interesting directions and bring interesting insights. There are story and development possibilities for both.

But here's the problem: over there, both topics have been done to death. I literally cannot count how many times people on the Polaris thread on CBR decided to spend pages talking about these things. And whereas I do talk about Genosha and its importance for Lorna a lot, I do so because a) the comics keep refusing to even acknowledge that part of her history, and b) that matter is pivotal to understanding who Lorna is and how she thinks.

What she wears and who she fucks is neither of those things.

Someone who hasn't had to deal with this stuff will understandably think "What's the big deal if people talk about those topics even if it's over and over and over again?"

To that, I have to explain that when your conversation is almost entirely about those two topics, the message you're sending to the company and to other fans is that those two things are where the character's focus should be.

Not on more pertinent things like how she would respond to Orchis and other attempts at genocide based on her own past experience with it. Not on how her long history with the X-Men would play into her perception of current events.

The focus ends up being aimed at superficial things. And in the case of sex and potential partners, it brings with it a huge risk of just repeating all the same problems of how she's been depicted around Havok.

When someone focuses mainly on her looks and sex, what they're suggesting is that the best approach to writing Lorna is a very shallow one where nothing of deeper substance needs to be explored.

When you get down to it, this is part of why her treatment over the past decade has been focused on those two things too, including the coffee cup deal. Coffee was a neat quirk when it first appeared, but ended up being a problem once it took the place of doing anything truly meaningful with the character.

Ultimately, the topics of clothes and possible romance are like filler episodes of a TV show. They're fine here and there, to add a little flavor to the characters and bridge gaps. But people don't watch your show for nothing but filler episodes. People don't watch the baseball episode of an anime and think "Oh man I wish they would stop with all the demons and powerful fighting moves and deeper themes of this show to focus entirely on baseball."

The chicken dinner joke from the movie Inside (2023) is another way to put it. Wish I could link a clip or good text for it, but can't find either so I'll just relay.

The movie itself involves Willem Dafoe's character, Nemo, trapped in a high tech condo after a botched art heist, slowly losing his mind from the isolation. He tells a joke about a girl who loves chicken having that for dinner... every single night. Her mom decides to make that for dinner every night, nonstop. In the beginning, the girl is ecstatic to have her favorite meal. But after over a week of eating the exact same thing, she ends up first not caring, then loathing it, then reaching the point of sarcastically saying she loves chicken again cause that's all she ever gets.

That's the "what could Lorna wear and who could she fuck" discussion when it constantly comes up.

It's worse right now, because we're on the cusp of what's shaping to be an excellent story for Lorna having a huge moment. There are so, SO many things that could be discussed about the character and what could be done with her. What parallels we can already see (e.g. bringing Knowhere to Earth being like flinging Krakoa into space in the 70s), which could happen.

But instead, they're once again talking about what she could wear and who she could fuck.

What kind of message does that send when such a huge moment for Lorna leads not to deeper discussion on themes and character, but on superficial stuff? Far more importantly, what does it mean when the superficial stuff actively prevents deeper discussion from happening in any meaningful way?

That's a big part of why I don't mind skipping out on the CBR thread at this juncture. Right now, it really doesn't represent Lorna and why people voted for her to win the X-Men vote. It represents a minority of people who would rather talk about superficial things, and for some people, revert her to past poor depictions.

[minerwarfare-suzuya]

Context

Cagney has stated and shown that Nicole chatted with Hanna who is running Mobox87's Tumblr to have her get back online so she can chat with them but due to the events of Mobox87's attempt of suicide and lack of human motivation, she was feeling weak to even get up and Hanna wanted no part in the drama while moderating the account which is why Nicole took the initiative to chat with Cagney in the dm's.

Like Cagney said, nothing really came out of it when chatting with Nicole. Both couldn't respect each others opinion and were quick to insult one another over.

Nicole's first response to Cagney after both did not know where to start off the conversation but said they were "cowardly" for not wanting to do a voice call. The response Cagney said back was that the reason why he doesn't want to call is for "identity reasons" while laughing off about it.

Make note that this has been explained before why Cagney doesn't want to reveal their voice on the rant video they made against Mobox87.

Despite the idea of Nicole wanting to voice chat with Cagney and being refused. Nicole criticizes Cagney over his choice and makes fun of the comment made by Cagney about "mental power".

During the ongoing conversation, Nicole continues on saying how cowardly Cagney is while he talks about how the events that were discussed on Mobox87's interview with Nicole were things that happened based on the photographic evidence (evidence can be seen on the Moboxcritique's archive.) which mobox labeled as lies. Regardless of Cagney saying his part in his conversation, Nicole went off saying if Cagney ever consider asking Mobox87 on why certain actions were made and why is that never disputed to rub it in as if Mobox87 was never consulted with.

Ahem! Forgetting Crying Blossom's second callout video.

Nicole still goes off at Cagney by saying their blog is a message to spread hate on Mobox87 to harass her and to have him open his eyes to see the changes Mobox87 has done. Cagney responded by making comparison with a murder and a pedophile with a conclusion that despite changes it'll forever remain a part of them and relapses will kick in.

Mobox87 only changed her outcome by acknowledging a warning to her content but never was truly sorry for what actions she's did especially to Crying Blossom who is the first that stood up to her bullshit and has continued on to slander Kevonica. Like for fuck sakes Mobox87 cries wolf when put on the spot and took it to the extreme this time.

Going on still, Cagney says that Mobox87 hasn't shown any improvements of being a good person to show that she's changed online. Nicole disregard what was said and mentioned "a long-term call" talking to Mobox87 in private after the interview. She said that "emotional dependency" was the cause of her "bad deeds". Cagney made a statement saying that these were excuses and that it didn't have anything to do with her drawings because it didn't add up since Mobox87 exposed her work to minors that were supposedly driven by "bad deeds". Cagney labels Mobox87 as a lier forward on.

Then yada yada... Both Cagney and Nicole go back and forth about being wiser til Nicole said that Mobox87's ex friends manipulated her to do bad things through some mental abuse.

The two of them argued in the chat over how it was manipulation or excuses to justify her actions. Cagney insisted Nicole to look into the archives of the Moboxcritique blog but Nicole said she's read it all already and stated that there's stuff missing or out of context to label Cagney as a liar. The argument couldn't be resolved by the two of them and it concluded on a bad note.

I would like to mention that the Moboxcritique blog does have stuff missing but not in terms of taking things out of context to lie about Mobox87 cause the evidence is there. What the blog and video Moboxcritique made along with other critic videos lack is stuff that I know personally or stuff that is overlooked or what others don't know about.

In all honesty, Nicole is a one sided argument and a dick rider of this drama. Like we hear Mobox87 out and had people talk with her before. Just to only be backstabbed or laughed at behind our back to show that Mobox87 is only bluffing to get herself free from a situation she created and can't confront.

[lunetual]

What do you think about the taehyun situation?? You haven't said much?

i mean. i just don't have anything to say. i knew it was going to get blown way out of proportion because kpoppies can't ever treat idols as human beings and especially on twt people love engaging in fanwars for ?? fun ???? because they're miserable ??? idk could never be me. i think generally if u follow txt you already know taehyun goes out to bars w/ his hometown friends bc he ??? talks about it openly??

i haven't really discussed it beyond like a vague text post on my blog bc i have nothing to add to the discussion that hasn't already been said by the dash lol and i don't find it productive to just. add to the echo chamber. the whole situation puts a bad taste in my mouth and i just feel awful for taehyun and the tubatus because even though i'm sure they cognitively know that taehyun's done nothing wrong and that the majority of fans support them, emotionally this is super stressful and nobody likes seeing their name dragged through the mud for !! doing a totally normal thing !! i know everyone is like 'taehyun come home' / 'come back we miss you' and i miss him too but personally i think he should stay off the internet for a bit for his own peace of mind actually.

[geaesaekki]

               @clemencetaught sent :

“Have you been reading the tabloids lately?” He asks her rather nonchalantly while flipping to the next page of his book. As usual, they’re sharing the same train car on the journey over to the Capitol. “They think we’re dating. Oh, and apparently you have a thing for bald men.” A glimmer of amusement flashes through his eyes. “Shall I tell them anything else? Worst comes to worst, we can always tell them that your preferences also include men who wear socks with sandals.” ( and last but not least, devrick in the thg verse <3 <3 <3 okie that's all i got for now lynnie, but i'll be back with more :D HAVE A GOOD ONE IN THE MEANWHILE <3 <3 <3 )

"Wait wait wait what- Already?" In a sharp move she puts her own book down and catches one of the tabloids placed on a pile she hasn't touched. Devora never reads any of these even after being advised multiple times to care about the public opinion. Him and her : dating? It has been discussed with the public relations team quickly after her victory : how to metamorphose her image from a bloody heartless soldier to an example for the young women in Panem. Having the 54th victor as a boyfriend appeared as the beginning of a strong strategy, an entire lore to give a better image to the games outcomes as well. Their public appearances as a "couple" has been discussed however Devora was not expecting the team to already make the move without her agreement. As a victor she has privileges but isn't quite in charge of everything she would want to be ... Yet. Two weeks ago, she has finally confessed her feelings to Aeri... What an unfair timing. Devora did not have the time to break the news of this fake couple strategy to her newly girlfriend before Aeri reads it all in PanemHotGoss - or whatever the magazines names are. She has to call her, later, when she's alone. Flipping the pages, Devora's annoyance couldn't be hidden, her features twisting in unease. "The first public appearance of the most coveted victors couple is spectulated to take place at the Capitol's Annual Autumn Ball. Ew. Fucking hell." Devora comments in disgust before looking at Patrick above the pages she's holding. "Don't get me wrong. You are ... adequate." She speaks to reassure him : it isn't the idea of being together with him that digusts her that much but the article itself. Devora's delivery of compliments also needs a little more of polishing. "I just do not like the angle they are using to make me more... What word did the PR team used - Relatable? I Am a fighter, I'm a soldier, I'm not some pretty bubbly tabloids girlfriend. If I have to stand as an example for my District, that is Not the example I want to give... Do I even have a choice." An heavy sigh. It will take years for her to forge her image and responsabilities the way she desires to. Thankfully Patrick is here to help her cool off, he makes her laugh too, which she appreciates. One silly line about bold men. "Fuck they really said that?" And his add on about socks in sandals, this one makes her laugh out loud. "Shut up." Devora speaks in an amused tone of course as she is still laughing. Her laughter trails off a bit as she marks a pause, her eyes still down on the pages, pensive. The tabloids said it "men ; Patrick said it too, "men". She breathes in. "I hm. I don't like men." Devora blurts not truly looking at him in the eye. He might be the first person she admits that to - first, it isn''t her type to open up about her privacy and secondly, the Capitol would never accept it. It must all remain a secret. Patrick, he understands right? Devora believes he does. They are friends now too, aren't they.

[wazzuppy]

wanted to elaborate a little more and add on to this post, so, yahoo! no clue if this will make any sense because (as usual) i'm tired and in physical pain, but hopefully at least someone will understand what i'm trying to say.

i forgot misako, mostly because she only serves as a love interest for about two seasons and then it's never mentioned again. but she still falls into the same category of "only here to fill a role and rarely gets the opportunity to define herself outside of that"

again: i LIKE all of these characters. i enjoy all of them and i'm only so frustrated because i want better for them. they all genuinely have a lot of potential.

not all of these characters are equal in how well written they are. vania, akita, and pixal are all solid, for the the most part. but regardless, they're all severely underutilized and underdeveloped (which is especially infuriating in pixal's case because she's the only other woman who could be considered part of the main cast).

no, vania and cole are not canon. however, with the framing and the animation of their initial interaction, i find it hard to believe that were absolutely no romantic undertones intended. mostly because ninjago has done that exact scene of "pretty woman exists and makes the man smile" with ALL of its canon pairings. not to mention both jay and lloyd make comments about them potentially being into each other. i dont personally interpret the two of them as anything more than friends, nor do some of the writers accoring to doc wyatt, but if they were trying to make it strictly platonic then they really fumbled it.

and now the big one i wanted to talk about: geo. he's the most subject to change out of everyone listed, because dragons rising is still ongoing and it still hasn't been technically confirmed that he's intended to be a love interest for cole (why does cole keep having all the most complicated to discuss ships?). but the romantic coding, just like with vania and cole, is still there. even if it never goes anywhere, i can't just ignore it. so that's why i decided to include him. now, do i think geo will get more screentime? yes. do i think it'll be anything substantial? maybe. he already has the potential for a character arc outside of cole-- that being his (possible) geckle/munce heritage-- and if they decide to do anything with that than he'll already be leagues above most of the girls. but if is the key word there. and personally? i don't know if i can fully trust dragons rising to pay off that potential. not because i don't think it's capable, but because i don't know if it'll care to. love interests are so rarely allowed to exist without their partner, especially in a series aimed at young boys like ninjago is, and considering the series' track record i'm hesitant to say anything for certain. there is also the uncomfortable intersectionality of this being the first secondary love interest character who may be allowed to have a character away from their partner, and it's a man. that wouldn't be so bad if there were any well done female love interests, but there really aren't. not in the supporting cast, anyways (akita gets close, but her romance with lloyd is so out of nowhere that i don't feel good calling its inclusion well done). but at the same time however, having a queer love interest with that kind of story arc would be huge. it's arguably in an even shakier state than good het fem love interests, with the only show i can think of off the top of my head that does this being the owl house with amity. that's where things get more complicated, because while new types of representation is great, it's hard for me to find it completely sincere if your still struggling so much with another, much more common type of rep.

so, the conclusion? i don't know. like i said, dragons rising is still ongoing and it all depends on where the writers take things from here. over the years and especially with dr coming out, ninjago's writing with its female characters has gotten much better. and it still is much better than a lot of other shows when it comes to this type of stuff. so, i'm more optimistic that good things will be coming than i would be for other shows, and even more than i'd be for ninjago just a couple of seasons ago. seabound and dragons rising have proven that theyre able to handle this well, but they still need to keep it up.

anyways im tired goodnight forever

i don't often like to criticize or complain about ninjago (just bc doing that with my special interests makes me sad), but jesus christ, i am so so tired of the continuous pattern of ninjago introducing a new character just so they can be a love interest. at the very least, nya allowed to be something outside of her romance with the jay, but that's still only 1/7. meanwhile pixal only gets to exist without zane sometimes; akita and harumi (in crystalized) have their romances tacked on for little to no reason; and skylor, vania, and geo don't have enough screen time or strong writing for me to consider them actual people.

and that sucks because i LIKE all those characters and i like some of the ships their involved in, but it's also just,,, SO fucking frustrating as an aromantic person to see characters only be created so they can date another one and do nothing else. especially since most of them are one-off female characters and there's a good chance of never seeing again ever, meaning not only do i, as a woman, lose part of my representation, but that i STILL can't fully relate to them because all of them are/were intended to pair up with other characters.

anyways. sorry for the rant. ninjago is definitely not the worst offender when it comes to this trend, but its still something i think about a lot because the series is so special to me. i guess i just felt like getting it out of my system

[sueske]

hi there!! I wanted to ask you about indra and ashura. I'm sorry if you've already spoke about this or answered this before, I know I'm late lol my question is why do you think Kishimoto made the brothers Indra and Ashura to be reincarnated in Naruto and Sasuke? I know those brothers kinda exist to make Kaguya relevant as the final villian but why make them reincarnated into Sasuke and Naruto? Kishimoto went through such hard and tedious work adding so much romance between Naruto and Sasuke just to go and give all dude bros a perfect excuse to call Naruto and Sasuke brothers (because they have reincarnated brother souls in them) and I was just wondering why he would do that??

heya!

"Kishimoto went through such hard and tedious work adding so much romance between Naruto and Sasuke just to go and give all dude bros a perfect excuse to call Naruto and Sasuke brothers" - that's exactly why. the most perfect cover, isn't it, a convenient argument they inevitably fall back on after being confronted with all the evidence that showcase sns' relationship as romantic. that's all they can say when they're backed up into a corner. "ss and nh were planned from the start!", "Naruto and Sasuke are brothers!" give me a break lol they're so desperate. I wouldn't be surprised if Kishimoto did that because of outside pressure and due to the ending in sight... but even then it's important to note it's not their actual souls that were reincarnated, but their chakras.

Numerous other ppl made really comprehensive posts/interesting discussions about this before, idk if you've seen them but here are some, I don't really have anything to add that hasn't been said before: 1, 2

[fangirlandtheories]

For the sleepover ask game: What was your last impulse purchase (that wasn't a food or drink)? Favorite accessories that you like to wear? Current song stuck in your head? FMK Steve, Eddie, Robin. Last thing that made you laugh? Do you collect anything, if so what and whats the story behind it? Post a random image you saved within the last three days.

Probably not my last impulse by as I purchased this last month BUT I bought one of Joseph Quinn's autographs from Galaxy Con and I don't regret it for a second.

I have a claddagh ring, necklace, pride anklet, and septum piercing that I wear every single day. The necklace and ring were my grandmother's and the ring was one she bought in Ireland 🥰

I'm a Broadway Bisexual so I've listened to Fiddler on The Roof like 9 times in the last week. I currently have If I Was A Rich Man trapped there.

Fuck Robin, just to start off with. Marry Steve, easy. Kill Eddie because he's already beating the death allegations. Kill and revive and also marry Eddie.

I work at Starbucks and instead of saying Happy Holidays we've been saying Happy Honda-days to each other and saying shit like "On this the holiest day of Toyotathon?!" And it cracks me up

I collect $2 bills! My Nan Nan actually collected them and as a kid they seemed so mesmerizing and magical because logically they shouldn't exist. When she passed away I received her couple of bills, she only had like 4. I used to work near this railroad that would hand them out as change because they did historical reenactment there and $2 bills were common currency during that time. I kept getting the bills as a tip or as change in the register, so I'd always swap it for two singles and keep the $2 bill. It's really made me feel like I'm sharing something special with my Nan Nan every time I add another. I'm up to about 18 of them now.

I'll hit you with 2 😊

A work in progress for a friend. We jokingly came up with this title while we were hanging out at a fair discussing our own love lives. I said "Look at us! We don't 'pull bitches' as the kids would say. We're BITCH LESS AT THE FAIR" and then we laughed and said it would be an incredible fic title. So she's also the friend actively trying to find me on AO3 and hasn't found me yet. She thinks that me posting it will be her link to me but she forgets that you can submit work to AO3 on anonymous.

A little jump scare for you my little dumplings. This is my mug 👁👄👁

Also @softasawhisper YOU'RE MY RAINBOW ANON?!? Thank you so much for the sweet asks that you send me, I love you.

[squarebracket-trickster]

Okay, here's what I've got:

At one point in chapter 2, Feyre does outright say that Nesta is cruel but I can't find any evidence to actually support that. I used the term, mean, to describe her before but upon reviewing the source material I actually think a better term for my problem with her is ungrateful.

Now, the thing is, I would only call her ungrateful for the first four chapters of ACOTAR. The next time we see her is 3/4 of the way through the book and she doesn't really do anything else from that point on that I take issue with (that I can remember). Which, of course, is the thing we were discussing - SJM making a character mean when she wants that character to be mean, and then suddenly making them good when she changes her mind.

But yes, for most of the series Nesta is blunt, brutally honest, confrontational, negative, and unpleasant. She has a tendency to use deliberately inflammatory language without good reason or regard for how it affects others' feelings (and when she could have said the exact same things, just much kinder). But she does have a strong moral compass underneath it all. Also, she doesn't owe anyone politeness or pleasantness. She isn't someone I would personally want to spend time with but... it's not a moral failing. It's just who she is.

What I take issue with is how she acts towards Feyre in the first few chapters of ACOTAR, because it is ungrateful, selfish, and leech-behaviour.

Now, this could just be because the story is from Feyre's perspective. Maybe Nesta was doing the cooking and cleaning. Maybe Nesta had a job in town, or was looking for one, and trying to bring in money. But nowhere in the text is it mentioned that Nesta made any contribution to the household. In fact, Feyre repeatedly talks about how she is the only one hunting, cleaning, preparing, and preserving the food. The other three (Nesta, Elaine, their father) never help.

Except for one scene where Nesta chops firewood. And she only does so because Feyre has to ask her repeatedly. It becomes an argument. Now, Feyre has just come back from a dangerous hunting trip. She is tired, has brought home two weeks of food for the family, and, frankly, has done her fair share of work. She asks Nesta to add some wood to the fire, then sees that the firewood hasn't even been chopped, even though Nesta said she would do it that day. Nesta's only response is essentially that, "I don't like chopping wood and my rich-lady hands are far too delicate. You should do it." Feyre asks her to do it a second time. Nesta refuses. Feyre tells her, "either do it or you are eating a cold breakfast." Nesta does not acknowledge her.

In the end, Nesta does chop the firewood but it was not fair to Feyre to even have to ask, especially to have to fight her on it. And frankly, Nesta and Feyre grew up in the same wealthy household. The only reason Feyre's hands are "more suited" to chopping fire wood is because she has been doing all the manual labour the other three are refusing to. It is extremely ungrateful of Nesta to tell Feyre essentially, "you're already doing all the work, you should do the rest too so that I can keep my hands soft." What about Feyre's hands??

And there was also the time Nesta wanted to use the money Feyre earned from her (Feyre's) hunt to buy herself (Nesta) a new pair of shoes when she already had a completely serviceable pair and Feyre's, which were sitting right beside hers by the door, were completely falling apart. Not to mention, Feyre would be hunting in those shoes while Nesta would just be walking around town. If this was my family, the shoes of the person bringing in the food would be prioritized. Why Nesta seemed completely oblivious to Feyre's needs, despite Feyre (at least in Feyre's perspective but we are never given any evidence to the contrary) being the only reason she hadn't starved to death yet reeks of entitlement.

I've added the specific quotes I am referencing below.

I also added one more which is the closest Nesta gets to outright mean. Now, I get sisters can be nasty to each other and that's normal, but the reason I take issue with this quote is that Nesta says Feyre stinks and then calls her an ignorant peasant, right after Feyre had come back from hunting for their food. The same day Nesta had promised to chop firewood and then didn't. The reason Feyre stunk was because she had been out hunting for Nesta's food. Like, how much more entitled, bratty, and ungrateful can you get?? Like, geez Nesta, would you rather Feyre be as proper and dignified as you? Would you really rather she let you starve?? And, this isn't even the first time Nesta has made this comment.

And, the other thing I would like to point out here is that Nesta is not a child. At the start of ACOTAR, Feyre is 19 and Nesta is three years older than her. This isn't the behaviour of a teenager having trouble adjusting to her new reality. This is a full-grown 22 year-old adult who has had eight years to get used to it, and for four of those years she has been a hole-ass adult. Feyre, on the other hand, was still a child when she started hunting and caring for her family.

Personally, I think Feyre should have run away years ago and left her ungrateful, spoiled sisters and her deadbeat father to die or smarten up. Feyre herself said the only reason she stayed was because she made a promise to their mother.

If Chapter 2-4 Nesta had behaved that way in my family, she would not have been given any of the meat to eat, let alone money from the sale of its pelt.

But, of course, I have different opinions about the Nesta we meet 3/4 of the way through ACOTAR. I actually really like that character and think she is very interesting and strong.

My sources:

"Will it take you long to clean it?" Me. Not [Elaine], not the others. I'd never once seen their hands sticky with blood and fur. (ACOTAR, p. 10)

"We can eat half the meat this week... we can dry the other half," I went on, knowing no matter how nicely I phrased it, I'd still do the bulk of it... No one bothered to confirm they'd heard me anyways. (ACOTAR, p. 12)

...Nesta rose and declared: "I need a new pair of boots." / I kept quiet, knowing better than to get in the middle of their arguments, but I glanced at Nesta's still-shiny pair by the door. Beside hers, my too-small boots were falling apart at the seams, held together only by fraying laces. (ACOTAR, p. 13)

...I looked up in time to see Nesta crinkle her nose with with a sniff. She picked at my cloak. "You stink like a pig covered in its own filth. Can't you at least try to pretend that you're not an ignorant peasant?" / I didn't let the ache show. I'd been too young to learn more than the basics of manners and reading and writing when our family had fallen into misfortune, and she'd never let me forget it. (ACOTAR, p. 14)

"Can you make a pot of hot water and add wood to the fire?" But even as I asked, I noticed the woodpile. There were only five logs left. "I thought you were going to chop wood today." / Nesta picked at her long, neat nails. "I hate chopping wood. I always get splinters... Besides, Feyre," she said with a pout, "you're much better at it! It takes you half the time it takes me. Your hands are suited for it -- they're already so rough." / ..."Please get up at dawn to chop that wood... or we'll be eating a cold breakfast." / Her brows narrowed. "I will do no such thing!" (ACOTAR, p. 14)

being a writer means being almost 4k into a rewrite of a book you disliked because IT HAD SM POTENTIAL

[sk1fanfiction]

the many faces of tom riddle, part 4

-attachment, orphanages, and yet more child psych: time to add yet another voice to the void-

FULL DISCLAIMER THAT THIS IS JUST MY OPINION OF A CHARACTER WHO DOESN’T HAVE THE STRONGEST CANON CHARACTERIZATION, AND THUS ALL THIS IS BASED ON MY CONCEPTUALIZATION.

I'm going to be super biased, because my favorite portrayal of Tom Riddle is actually Hero Fiennes-Tiffin as eleven-year-old Tom Riddle, in HBP and I get to chat about child psych in this one, sooo here we go.

First of all, I’m just so impressed that a kid could bring that much depth to such a complex character.

This is the portrayal, I feel, that brings us closest to Tom’s character. Yes, Coulson’s brought us pretty close, but by fifth year, the mask was on.

We don't really get to see Tom looking afraid very often, but it's fear that rules his life, so it's really poignant in our first (chronologically) introduction, he looks absolutely terrified.

The void being the fandom's loud opinions on a certain headmaster. I wouldn't call myself pro-Dumbledore, but I'm certainly not anti-Dumbledore, either. (Agnostic-Dumbledore??)

Since I'm not of the anti-Dumbledore persuasion, I decided to poke around in the tags and see what the arguments were, so I don't make comments out of ignorance.

Most of the tag seems to be more directed towards his treatment of Harry and Sirius, but a few people mentioned that Dumbledore should have treated Tom with ‘exceptional kindness’ and tried to ‘rehabilitate’ him.

As I said in Parts 2 and 3, I am 100% in favor of helping a traumatized kid learn to cope, and I don’t think Tom Riddle was solidly on the Path to Evil (TM) at birth, or even at eleven. Not even at fifteen.

Could unconditional love and kindness have helped Tom Riddle enough for the rise of Lord Voldemort to never happen? Possibly, but...

Yes, I'm about to drag up that Carl Jung quote, again.

“I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.”

The problem with this is that if you’re going to blame Dumbledore for this, you also have to blame every other adult in Tom’s life: his headmaster, Dippet, his Head of House, Slughorn, his ‘caretakers’ at the orphanage, Mrs. Cole and Martha, and possibly more. In fact, if we're going to blame any adult, let's blame Merope for r*ping and abusing Tom Riddle Senior, and having a kid she wasn't intending to take care of.

Furthermore, you cannot possibly hold anyone but Tom accountable for the murders he committed. (I should not have to sit here and explain why cold-blooded murder is wrong.) And if you like Tom Riddle's character, insinuating that his actions are completely at the whim of others is just a bit condescending towards him. He's not an automaton or a marionette, he's a very intelligent human being with a functioning brain, and at sixteen is fully capable of moral reasoning and critical analysis.

I've heard the theories about Dumbledore setting the Potters up to die, and I'm not going to discuss their validity right now; but he didn't put a wand in Tom's hand and force him to kill anyone. Tom did it all of his own accord.

And while yes, I have enormous sympathy for what happened to Tom as a child, at some point, he decided to murder Myrtle Warren, and that is where I lose my sympathy. Experiencing trauma does not give you the right to inflict harm on others. Yes, Tom was failed, but then, he spectacularly failed himself.

We also have no idea how Dumbledore treated Tom as a student.

In the movies, it’s Dumbledore who tells Tom he has to go back to the orphanage, but in the books, it’s Dippet. We know that Slughorn spent a lot of time around Tom at Slug Club and such, yet I don’t really see people clamoring for his head.

I regard the sentiment that Dumbledore turned Tom Riddle into Lord Voldemort with a lot of skepticism.

But let's hear from the character himself -- his impression of eleven-year-old Tom Riddle.

“Did I know that I had just met the most dangerous Dark wizard of all time?” said Dumbledore. “No, I had no idea that he was to grow up to be what he is. However, I was certainly intrigued by him. I returned to Hogwarts intending to keep an eye upon him, something I should have done in any case, given that he was alone and friendless, but which, already, I felt I ought to do for others’ sake as much as his."

Now, assuming that Dumbledore's telling the truth, I'm not seeing something glaringly wrong with this. No, he hasn't pigeonholed Tom as evil, yes, I'd be intrigued, too, and it's a very good idea to keep an eye on Tom, for his own sake.

“At Hogwarts,” Dumbledore went on, “we teach you not only to use magic, but to control it. You have — inadvertently, I am sure — been using your powers in a way that is neither taught nor tolerated at our school."

Again, it seems like he's at least somewhat sympathetic towards Tom, and is willing to at least give him a chance.

More evidence (again, assuming Dumbledore is a reliable narrator):

Harry: “Didn’t you tell them [the other professors], sir, what he’d been like when you met him at the orphanage?” Dumbledore: “No, I did not. Though he had shown no hint of remorse, it was possible that he felt sorry for how he had behaved before and was resolved to turn over a fresh leaf. I chose to give him that chance.”

Now, I think Dumbledore is pretty awful with kids, but I don't think that's malicious. Yeah, it's a flaw, but perfect people don't exist, and perfect characters are dead boring. I am not saying that he definitely handled Tom's case well, I'm just saying that there's little evidence that Dumbledore, however shaken and scandalized, wrote him off as 'evil snake boy.'

It's also worth taking into account that it's 1938, and the attitudes towards mental health back then.

Why is Tom looking at Dumbledore like that, anyway? Why is he so scared? What has he possibly been threatened with or heard whispers of?

"'Professor'?" repeated Riddle. He looked wary. "Is that like 'doctor'? What are you here for? Did she get you in to have a look at me?"

"I don't believe you," said Riddle. "She wants me looked at, doesn't she? Tell the truth!"

"You can't kid me! The asylum, that's where you're from, isn't it? 'Professor,' yes, of course -- well, I'm not going, see? That old cat's the one who should be in the asylum. I never did anything to little Amy Benson or Dennis Bishop, and you can ask them, they'll tell you!

Tom keeps insisting he's not mad until Dumbledore finally manages to calm him down.

I'm really upset this wasn't in the movie, because it's important context. Instead we got these throwaway cutscenes of some knick-knacks relating to the Cave he's got lying around, but I just would have preferred to see him freaking out like he does in the book.

There was extreme stigma and prejudice towards mental illness.

'Lunatic asylums,' as they were called in Tom's time, were terrible places. In the 1930s and 40s, he could look forward to being 'treated' with induced convulsions, via metrazol, insulin, electroshock, and malaria injections. And if he stuck around long enough, he could even look forward to a lobotomy!

So, if you think Dumbledore was judgmental towards Tom, imagine how flat-out prejudiced whatever doctors or 'experts' Mrs. Cole might have gotten in to 'look at him' must have been!

Moving on to the next few shots, he is sitting down and hunched over as if expecting punishment or at least some kind of bad news, Dumbledore is mostly out of the frame. He’s trapped visually, by Dumbledore on one side, and a wall on the other, because he’s still very much afraid. uncomfortable, as he tells Dumbledore a secret that he fears could get him committed to an asylum (which were fucking horrible places, as I said).

It brings to the scene that miserable sense of isolation and loneliness to that has defined Tom’s entire life up to that point (and, partially due to his own bad choices, continues to define it).

And, when Dumbledore accepts it, his posture changes. he becomes more confident and more at ease, as he describes the... utilities of his magical abilities. 

"All sorts," breathed Riddle. A flush of excitement was rising up his neck into his hollow cheeks; he looked fevered. "I can make things move without touching them. I can make animals do what I want them to do, without training them. I can make bad things happen to people who annoy me. I can make them hurt if I want to."

Riddle lifted his head. His face was transfigured: There was a wild happiness upon it, yet for some reason it did not make him better looking; on the contrary, his finely carved features seemed somehow rougher, his expression almost bestial.

I do think Harry, our narrator, is being a tad bit judgmental here. Magic is probably the only thing that brings Tom happiness in his grey, lonely world, and when I was Tom's age and being bullied, if I had magic powers, you'd better believe that I'd (a) be bloody ecstatic about it (b) use them. And, like Tom, I can't honestly say that I can't imagine getting a bit carried-away with it. Unfortunately, we can't all be as inherently good and kindhearted as Harry.

Reading HBP again, as a 'mature' person, it almost seems like the reader is being prompted to see Tom as evil just because he's got 'weird' facial expressions.

So... uh...

Nope, let's judge Tom on his actions, not looks of 'wild happiness.'

To his great surprise, however, Dumbledore drew his wand from an inside pocket of his suit jacket, pointed it at the shabby wardrobe in the corner, and gave the wand a casual flick. The wardrobe burst into flames. Riddle jumped to his feet; Harry could hardly blame him for howling in shock and rage; all his worldly possessions must be in there. But even as Riddle rounded on Dumbledore, the flames vanished, leaving the wardrobe completely undamaged.

Okay, one thing I dislike is Tom's lack of emotional affect when Dumbledore burned the wardrobe, in the books, he jumped up and started screaming, instead of looking passively (in shock, perhaps?) at the fire. Incidentally, I can't really tell if he's impressed or in shock, to be honest. I think they really tried to make Tom 'creepier' in the movie.

This is one of the incidents where Dumbledore's inability to deal with children crops up.

I think he was trying to teach Tom that magic can be dangerous, and he wouldn't like it to be used against him, but burning the wardrobe that contains everything he owns was a terrible move on Dumbledore's part. Tom already has very limited trust in other people, and now, he's not going to trust Dumbledore at all -- now, he's put Tom on the defensive/offensive for the rest of their interaction, and perhaps for the rest of their teacher-student relationship.

Riddle stared from the wardrobe to Dumbledore; then, his expression greedy, he pointed at the wand. "Where can I get one of them?"

"Where do you buy spellbooks?" interrupted Riddle, who had taken the heavy money bag without thanking Dumbledore, and was now examining a fat gold Galleon.

But I'm not surprised Tom is 'greedy.' He's grown up in an environment where if he wants something, whether that's affection, food, money, toys, he's got to take it. There's no one looking after his needs specifically. I'm not surprised that he's a thief and a hoarder, and I don't think that counts as a moral failing necessarily, and more of a maladaptive way of seeking comfort. It would be bizarre if he came out of Wool's Orphanage a complete saint.

Additionally, I think given that the Gaunt family has a history of 'mental instability,' Tom is a sensitive child, and the trauma of growing up institutionalized and possibly being treated badly due to his magical abilities or personality disorder deeply affected him.

And there are points where it seems that Dumbledore is quick to judge Tom.

"He was already using magic against other people, to frighten, to punish, to control."

"Yes, indeed; a rare ability, and one supposedly connected with the Dark Arts, although as we know, there are Parselmouths among the great and the good too. In fact, his ability to speak to serpents did not make me nearly as uneasy as his obvious instincts for cruelty, secrecy, and domination."

"I trust that you also noticed that Tom Riddle was already highly self-sufficient, secretive, and, apparently, friendless?..."

And while this is all empirically true, these are (a) a product of Tom's harsh environment, and (b) do not necessarily make him evil. But the point remains that child psych didn't exist as a field of its own, and psychology as a proper science was in its infancy, so I'd be shocked if Dumbledore was insightful about Tom's situation.

But I've gone a ton of paragraphs without citing anything, so I've got to rectify that.

Let's talk about Harry Harlow's monkey experiments in the 1950-70s.

If you're not a fan of animal research, since I know some people are uncomfortable with it, feel free to scroll past.

Here's the TL;DR: Children need to be hugged and shown affection too, not just fed and clothed, please don't leave babies to 'cry out' and ignore their needs because it's backwards and fucking inhumane. HUG AND COMFORT AND CODDLE CHILDREN AND SPOIL THEM WITH AFFECTION!

I will put more red writing when the section is over.

This is still an interesting experiment to have in mind while we explore the whole 'no one taught Tom Riddle how to love' thing and whether or not it's actually a good argument.

Andddd let's go all the way back to the initial 1958 experiment, featured in Harlow's paper, the Nature of Love. (If you're familiar with Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, him and Harlow actually collaborated for a time).

To give you an idea of our starting point, until Harlow's experiment, which happened twenty years after Dumbledore meets Tom for the first time, no one in science had really been interested in studying love and affection.

"Psychologists, at least psychologists who write textbooks, not only show no interest in the origin and development of love or affection, but they seem to be unaware of its very existence."

I'm going to link some videos of Harry Harlow showing the actual experiment, which animal rights activists would probably consider 'horrifying.' It's nothing gory or anything, but if you are particularly soft-hearted (and I do not mean that as an insult), be warned. It's mostly just baby monkeys being very upset and Harlow discussing it in a callous manner. Yes, today it would be considered unethical, but it's still incredibly important work and if you think you can handle it, I would recommend watching at least the first one to get an idea of how dramatic this effect is.

Dependency when frightened

The full experiment

The TL;DW:

This experiment was conducted with rhesus macaques; they're still used in psychology/neuroscience research when you want very human-like subjects, because they are very intelligent (unnervingly so, actually). I'd say that adult ones remind me of a three-year old child.

Harlow separated newborn monkeys from their mothers, and cared for their physical needs. They had ample nutrition, bedding, warmth, et cetera. However, the researchers noticed that the monkeys:

(a) were absolutely miserable. And not just that, but although all their physical needs were taken care of, they weren't surviving well past the first few days of life. (This has also been documented in human babies, and it's called failure to thrive and I'll talk about it a bit later).

(b) showed a strong attachment to the gauze pads used to cover the floor, and decided to investigate.

So, they decided to provide a surrogate 'mother.' Two, actually. Mother #1 was basically a heated fuzzy doll that was nice for the monkeys to cuddle with. Mother #2 was the same, but not fuzzy and made of wire. Both provided milk. The result? The monkeys spent all their time cuddling and feeding from the fuzzy 'mother.' Perhaps not surprising.

What Harlow decided next, is that one of the hallmarks being attached to your caregiver is seeking hugs and reassurance from them when frightened. So, when the monkeys were presented with something scary, they'd go straight to the cloth mother and ignore the wire one. Not only that, but when placed in an unfamiliar environment, if the cloth mother was present, the monkeys would be much calmer.

In a follow-up experiment, Harlow decided to see if there was some sort of sensitive period by introducing both 'mothers' to monkeys who had been raised in isolation for 250 days. Guess what?

The initial reaction of the monkeys to the alterations was one of extreme disturbance. All the infants screamed violently and made repeated attempts to escape the cage whenever the door was opened. They kept a maximum distance from the mother surrogates and exhibited a considerable amount of rocking and crouching behavior, indicative of emotionality.

Yikes. So, at first Harlow thought that they'd passed some kind of sensitive period for socialization. But after a day or two they calmed down and started chilling out with the cloth mother like the other monkeys did. But here's a weird thing:

That the control monkeys develop affection or love for the cloth mother when she is introduced into the cage at 250 days of age cannot be questioned. There is every reason to believe, however, that this interval of delay depresses the intensity of the affectional response below that of the infant monkeys that were surrogate-mothered from birth onward

All these things... attachment, affection, love, seeking comfort ... are mostly learned behaviours.

Over.

Orphanages, institutionalized childcare, and why affection is a need, not an extra.

His face is lit the exact same was as Coulson’s was in COS (half-light, half-dark), and I said I was going to talk about this in Part 3. I think perhaps it's intended to make Fiennes-Tiffin look more evil or menacing, but I'm going to quite deliberately misinterpret it.

Now, for some context, Dumbledore has just (kind of) burned his wardrobe, ratted out his stealing habit, and (in the books only, they really took a pair of scissors to this scene) told him he needs to go apologize and return everything and Dumbledore will know if he doesn't, and, well, Tom's not exactly a happy bugger about it.

But interestingly, in the books, this is when we start to see Tom's 'persona,' aka his mask, start to come into play. Whereas before, he was screaming, howling, and generally freaking out, here, he starts to hide his emotions -- in essence, obscure his true self under a shadow. So this scene is really the reverse of Coulson's in COS.

And perhaps I'm reading wayyy too much into this, but I can't help but notice that Coulson's hair is parted opposite to Fiennes-Tiffin's, and the opposite sides of their faces are shadowed, too.

Riddle threw Dumbledore a long, clear, calculating look. "Yes, I suppose so, sir," he said finally, in an expressionless voice.

Riddle did not look remotely abashed; he was still staring coldly and appraisingly at Dumbledore. At last he said in a colorless voice, "Yes, sir."

Here's an article from The Atlantic on Romanian orphanages in the 1980s, when the dictator, Ceausescu, basically forced people to have as many children as possible and funnel them into institutionalized 'childcare', and it's absolutely heartbreaking.

There's not a whole lot of information out there on British orphanages in the 30s' and 40s', but given that people back then thought you just had to keep children on a strict schedule and feed them, it wouldn't have a whole lot better.

The only thing I've found is this, and it's not super promising.

The most important study informing the criteria for contemporary nosologies, was a study by Barbara Tizard and her colleagues of young children being raised in residential nurseries in London (Tizard, 1977). These nurseries had lower child to caregiver ratios than many previous studies of institutionalized children. Also, the children were raised in mixed aged groups and had adequate books and toys available. Nevertheless, caregivers were explicitly discouraged from forming attachments to the children in their care.

Here's a fairly recent paper that I think gives a good summary: Link

Here, they describe the responses to the Strange Situation test (which tests a child's attachment to their caregiver).

We found that 100% of the community sample received a score of “5,” indicating fully formed attachments, whereas only 3% of the infants living in institutions demonstrated fully formed attachments. The remaining 97% showed absent, incomplete, or odd and abnormal attachment behaviors.

Bowlby and Ainsworth, who did the initial study, thought that children would always attach to their caregivers, regardless of neglect or abuse. But some infants don't attach (discussed along with RAD in Part 2).

Here's a really good review paper on attachment disorders in currently or formerly institutionalized children : Link

Core features of RAD in young children include the absence of focused attachment behaviors directed towards a preferred caregiver, failure to seek and respond to comforting when distressed, reduced social and emotional reciprocity, and disturbances of emotion regulation, including reduced positive affect and unexplained fearfulness or irritability.

Which all sounds a lot like Tom in this scene. The paper also discusses neurological effects, like atypical EEG power distribution (aka brain waves), which can correlate with 'indiscriminate' behavior and poor inhibitory control; which makes sense for a kid who, oh, I don't know, hung another kid's rabbit because they were angry.

Furthermore...

...those children with more prolonged institutional rearing showed reduced amygdala discrimination and more indiscriminate behavior.

This again, makes a ton of sense for Tom's psychological profile, because the amygdala (which is part of the limbic system, which regulates emotions) plays a major role in fear, anger, anxiety, and aggression, especially with respect to learning, motivation and memory.

So, I agree completely that Tom needed a lot of help, especially given the fact that he spent eleven years in an orphanage (longer than the Bucharest study I was referring to), and Dumbledore wasn't exactly understanding of his situation, and probably didn't realise what a dramatic effect the orphanage had on Tom, and given the way he talks to Tom, probably treated him as if he were a kid who grew up in a healthy environment.

In case you are still unconvinced that hugging is that important, there's a famous 1944 study conducted on 40 newborn human infants to see what would happen if their physical needs (fed, bathed, diapers changed) were provided for with no affection. The study had to be stopped because half the babies died after four months. Affection leads to the production of hormones and boosts the immune system, which increases survival, and that is why we hug children and babies should not be in orphanages. They are supposed to be hugged, all the time. I can't find the citation right now, I'll add it later if I find it.

But I think it's vastly unrealistic to say that Dumbledore, who grew up during the Victorian Era, would have any grasp of this and I don't think he was actively malicious towards Tom.

Was Tom Riddle failed by institutional childcare? Absolutely.

Were the adults in his life oblivious to his situation? Probably.

Do the shitty things that happened to Tom excuse the murders he committed, and are they anyone's fault but his own? No. At the end of the day, Tom made all the wrong choices.

And, for what it's worth, I think (film) Dumbledore (although he expresses the same sentiment in more words in the books) wishes he could go back in time and have helped Tom.

"Draco. Years ago, I knew a boy, who made all the wrong choices. Please, let me help you."