#I don't know how you get from a French accent to 1960s Hollywood's idea of Chinese either but it keeps happening and it is MORTIFYING

[amplexadversary]

... Ow. I took the advice to read the old man's dialogue in Dracula in as close to an north english accent as I can manage.

Which is nowhere close. I kept ending up in the US South after two to three sentences, because whenever I try to do an accent I end up teleporting after that amount of time.

So now my throat hurts. At least no one's home. And I managed not to mangle the vowels in a way where the accent I accidentally migrate to becomes a really racist one (I hate hate hate hate hate it so much this is why I never practice accents in front of people)

I think I get the gist of what he's saying though. Basically, "all these ghost stories and supernatural creatures are made up to scare people, people here love to tell falsehoods, hell, most of these epitaphs are completely untrue."