#I don't even know why I am so scared of posting it like. I doubt anyone from class would reverse image search it Ever

[gayvampcentral]

do I post the Alien fanart I made for my fan studies class at uni now or do I wait until a little after I got my grade to do that?

[cheeseceli]

When your parents don't like them

Pairing: Ot8!skz × Gn!Reader (individually)

Genre: reverse hurt/comfort? Angst? A little bit of fluff perhaps; reaction

Description: their reaction to not having the approval of your parents in their first meeting (established relationship)

Warnings: not proofread; a lot of overthinking and self doubt in most of the scenarios; the length of each story is not favouritsm!! It's just that some scenarios required more details than others

A/n: I should have posted this one a long time ago... Oh well. And I am literally the mix of Han and Lee Know, this would 100% happen to me if I were in their shoes

Bang Chan

‌HE'S SO SHOCKED

‌Parents always love him, so why didn't yours?

‌He believes he took it for granted

‌But he was so sure your family would love him

‌Rethinks everything he said and did

‌And thinks about what he could've done

‌He'll be up all night because of it, you better believe me

"Maybe it's the outfit I was wearing?"

"Chan, for God's sake, go to sleep."

"Seriously though, do you think my clothes weren't appropriate?"

"There was nothing wrong with how you looked baby."

"... So maybe I didn't introduce myself properly?"

"Chan."

Lee Know

‌ He knew he had to talk

‌ But it turns out he was too scared

‌And your parents just aggravated his problem

‌ He'd give only short answers and would only speak when spoken with

‌ Because of that your parents didn't see him as a really charismatic guy

‌ But I swear he was trying his best

"I swear it wasn't as bad as it seemed."

"It was horrible. I doubt any of your parents even know what my voice sounds like."

"You were nervous. I'm sure they'll understand. If you'd like I can talk to them about it."

"Please, don't. The last thing I want is for your parents to think that besides being awkward I'm a coward as well."

"They don't think either of those things. You'll see, you guys just need to know each other a little bit more. They'll love you."

Even with his worried expression, he gave you a small smile "I hope so".

Changbin

‌ You warned him he was getting too close

‌ He was holding your hand, caressing your thigh, hugging you too tight, kissing you a lot...

‌ All the time

‌ And yes, you both were dating for a while now

‌ But your parents didn't really appreciate the attitude

‌ And truly, he thought that by doing that he was showing how much he treasured and loved you

‌ Sadly your parents didn't understand his actions like he planned

"But what was I supposed to do? Stay away from you?"

"Ideally, yes"

Changbin pouted, not even realising it "but I'm your boyfriend"

"They are not used to this fact just yet. Don't worry though, they still have a lot of time to like you. Just wait and see"

Hyunjin

‌ Similar to Chan, Hyunjin didn't expect to be rejected by your parents

‌of course, he wasn't expecting to make the fall in love immediately, but he knew he had some charms

‌and he actually put a lot of effort into impressing them so when it doesn't work he's like

‌genuinely sad

‌And he's scared your relationship might change now that he doesn't have your family approval right away.

"So... About the dinner"

"They are always like this, don't worry"

"How come?"

"I knew they were gonna play hard to get. But don't you stress over it, sooner or later they will realise there is no need to act like it"

"So I can still convince them into not hating me?"

"Why would they hate you? You were really boyfriend material if you ask me"

He laughed, a little bit more relieved "They were kinda... aggressive back there, y'know?"

"Ugh, sorry about that. I swear things will get better"

"You're not mad?"

"Of course not. Why would I be?"

"I thought you'd get sad or something like that since the meeting didn't go that well"

"I'm a bit sad, yeah. But it's not your fault. You did your best. Besides, it won't last that long. It's kinda hard to hate on the Hwang Hyunjin for too long"

He laughed again, openly this time as he replied "I hope you are right"

Han

‌The problem wasn't exactly what he did

‌The problem was that he didn't do anything

‌Literally anything

‌ He'd excuse himself to go to the bathroom to avoid any questions

‌He barely moved besides that

‌After a while your dad even forgot he was there

‌And Han wished he could disappear

"I'm so, so sorry"

"Ji, it's okay"

"I was gonna answer your mother, I swear. But she was looking at me with daggers in her eyes"

"You were just fine"

"Fine? Y/n, your dad sighed in relief after I left the room. They must see me as a loser"

"I'm sure they don't. Besides, you still have a lot of time left to win them over. I know they'll love you"

Felix

‌Your parents loved him actually

‌They just don't think he is fit to be your boyfriend

‌They think that his angel face and sweet personality wouldn't give you enough security throughout your life

‌And Felix wants to prove himself to your parents so badly now

‌He will use his deep voice privilege to try to prove his point

‌He will go to the gym with Changbin until he's "intimidating" enough

‌And he won't fail on reminding them how he has over 60 medals on taekwondo

"How do I look?"

"Great, as always"

"But do I look intimidating? Scary?"

"Lix..."

"But not too scary. I need to look threatening to others but reliable to you"

"You look like someone my parents will like"

"They already like me, but not enough to like our relationship"

"They will though. Soon enough they will appreciate everything that comes along with you, trust me."

Felix smiled and nodded, feeling a certain comfort into your words as you headed to the door

"Just for the record, you do look threatening but reliable"

"Oh thank you. I was going crazy over this"

Seungmin

‌If your parents don't like Seungmin then the problem is on them

‌just kidding

‌Seriously though, I can't imagine why they wouldn't like him

‌And neither can Seungmin himself

‌So he truly thinks that everything was a misunderstanding and that it's only a matter of time until your whole family falls in love with him

‌He will face it like a challenge

"What about we invite your parents to our apartment this weekend?"

"We just saw them less than an hour ago"

"I think we should see them again"

"Did you like them that much?"

"They seem cool. But they also seem to hate me. I need to change their minds"

"What? They didn't hate you at all"

"Your father's glare would disagree. But that doesn't matter that much because by the end of this week they will love me"

"You seem certain"

"Of course I am. I can't have them hating me for the rest of our lives, can I?"

"They don't hate you. They are just... hard to please"

"I'll change this" he faced you with a confident smile "I give you my word"

I.N

‌Kinda clueless

‌Totally clueless actually

‌He can't understand what he did wrong but apparently he did something awful considering your parents disliked him that much

‌Will try to find ways to apologise

‌Will gift them and try to keep a conversation even when you're not around

"Does your mother like flowers? She does, right? Every mother does"

"What are you doing?"

"You said that she invited us to lunch this Friday. I don't want to go see her with empty hands again. Maybe that's what made her hate me so much the first time"

"She doesn't care about those things, Innie"

"No? Then why doesn't she like me?"

"She's just hard to satisfy, you know. But I bet she'll like you in no time. She just needs to get to know you better"

"You keep saying that but I don't know, I feel like that won't happen any time soon. I really want her to approve me"

He had that hopeless expression again, that one that really wanted to change the situation but didn't know how to. You really hated seeing him disappointed on himself.

"Lilies" you said

"What?"

"Those are my mother's favourites. Lilies"

"Oh my God, thank you" he got up and kissed the top of your head lightly, before going to the door of your shared apartment "I'll be right back"

Dividers by @saradika-graphics

Reblogs and feedback are always appreciated! | masterlist

[doctorcurdlejr]

Niko!! what'd you think of I saw the tv glow. I finally saw it last night and noticed you posting about it so I wanted to know your thoughts :)

Levi!!! I was JUST wondering what you were thinking about the movie after I saw you posting about it as well... we are so media discussion pilled in this way, it's awesome. ANYWAYS I've had so many thoughts since I first saw it and I've been trying to turn them into something coherent for a little bit now.

Ummm okay I have written 1k+ words about this movie, the suburbs, and escapism via teen TV.... clearly I was dying for somebody to ask this I guess so thank you for indulging me <3

First and foremost, I absolutely loved it! I've seen it twice now and the first time I watched it I got to see Jane Schoenbrun talk about the film right after. I already really liked it from that first watch alone. I found it so deeply relatable to my experiences - both in terms of growing up gay and trans, but where I am now in my 20s trying to navigate adulthood. Hearing what Schoenbrun had to say really cemented my feelings and thoughts about the film.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer was a big influence on the movie (it's why Amber Benson makes a cameo as Johnny Link's mom). Even though I don't have the same emotional link to Buffy since I never watched it, I recognize it as the same type of warmth I experienced growing up with Riverdale. When Owen says he feels like his insides have been scooped out but that he's too afraid to look and have that wrongness everybody knows is there be confirmed, Maddy simply responds "Maybe you're like Isabel. Afraid of what's inside you." Tears forming but not falling, breathing shallowly, I grabbed the paper and pen the theater keeps at the seats for people to order food with and wrote that line down - the slip of paper is still somewhere in my car. Writing it now almost feels lame in its simplicity, but it felt like my insides were being flayed open.

During the director discussion, Schoenbrun talked a little bit about this idea of how truly fucking bizarre it is to grow up in the suburbs. Like, when we think about the pinnacle of normality in American culture, it's the image of middle-class cis-hetero-white suburbia. At the same time, despite this cultural dream of normality, everybody is hyper-aware that the suburbs are one of the least normal things ever. So, the ACTUAL cultural understanding of it is that it's where we go to, like, passively kill ourselves (*George Costanza voice* WE LIVE IN A SOCIETY YOU KNOW!). This idea isn't new, I mean there are so many films and shows about navigating that specific bizarre dissonance from Rebel Without a Cause to Heathers to Twin Peaks. Probably half the pre-teen to teen TV I watched obsessively growing up, stuff like Strange Days at Blake Holsey High, Making Fiends, Truth or Scare, and eventually Riverdale, were never shy about being weird and morbid and saying "yes, the suburbs are exactly as bizarre and lethal in the ways you can already feel in your bones at 13." I Saw the TV Glow does a really good job of keying not only into that mental dissonance but more specifically into how those of us who have felt so intrinsically weird and different and wrong fell back on these shows like they were capable of doing the emotional version of a rescue breath maneuver after being drowned.

In high school, if there were two things about me that any person who even vaguely knew me could list off it was that I watched Riverdale, and I was a lesbian - and I was mocked more for the Riverdale. At that age, I was, without a doubt, the most miserable I have ever felt in my life. I rarely left the house because my family lived in a development that made me want to scratch my skin off when I walked out our front door. Owen didn't leave the house for days, afraid Maddy could somehow force him out. I sobbed constantly and frequently to depressing indie rock on the floor of my closet while hoping my family would just once read the (honest to god) KEEP OUT poster plastered on my door since I didn't have a lock on it. Owen didn't leave his room for days, afraid of what Maddy recognized in him. I didn't go on dates and kept my chest binder shoved to the bottom of my bookbag while wearing dresses that could've come from a how-to-be the perfect 50s housewife manual. Owen didn't leave his bed for days, afraid of Maddy touching his neck and Isabel's dress. I also watched Riverdale with the kind of zeal you see in a Pentecostal who has found God and started speaking in tongues to let you know it. I own a button that says, "Don't Make Me Go Dark Betty On You," I cherish it in a way that is only achieved by knowing exactly how corny and trite it is and then moving straight past that because well actually, and most people wouldn't get this, she's holding back something deeply dark and wild and- and disgusting. something painful yet intrinsically her. but i get it, obviously. or maybe not obviously! hopefully not obviously, but- basically, I'm just saying I get it: the experience of reflection and recognition through the other and all that.

Whatever, the point is that this movie is one big glaring trans allegory about how it sucks dog shit to live in the suburbs, and even at our most repressed we find these little snow globes of actualization in the glow of a tv screen that isn't afraid to show you the world you see. I've seen some people say that, like, in this context accepting or coming into your transness is this monumental death of self, which I get, but I feel there lacks a nuance in that because either way Owen is dying. Unlike Maddy who buries herself alive only to come out renewed, Owen doesn't kill himself upon facing the reality that the world is constructed to keep him miserable and the only way out is to take back what it is that the world wants to keep scooped out of him. Instead he just passively lets it drag him to a much more permanent death. This lack of suicide sucks in the kind of way that forces you to sit in your car on the midnight drive home and think to yourself am I letting myself suffocate because at some point knowing the misery became less scary than admitting I've been capable of doing something about it the whole time?

Clearly, I’ve been enchanted by the film’s narrative and meta-textual language. If you're familiar with it, you can see how Schoenbrun built this movie like a long-form dream episode of a canceled teen show filmed in Vancouver. Lynchian? Yeah, sure. Riverdalesque? THIS we cannot possibly deny. Schoenbrun said they included Amber Benson as an act of healing the inner rage experienced at Tara’s death in Buffy. This is a Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa ending Riverdale with a bisexual polycule after his gay Archie play got ceased-and-desisted type move. There’s probably more I could say about the soundtrack and the visuals, but I’ve hit over 1k words on this, so I’ll leave it at I enjoyed this movie a lot. :)

Maddy is an out lesbian who left town to escape the misery and found it strapped to her ankles. She slinks out, an animal pressed against the gymnasium floor, and says "I'm not telling you anything you don't already know." Owen looks into the camera and narrates. He cuts himself open with a box cutter, fully acknowledges what's there, and the movie ends with his suffocating apology parade for the unremarkable inconvenience of his excruciating suffering. You can be gay and trans, you can know it and you can stop repressing it, but you're not going to stop suffocating until you can find a way to destroy the part of you that truly deeply does want to die, reaching for the comforting euthanasia of normalcy. Stop visiting the dream of the life you want and make it into your reality with the same kind of unrepentant conviction seen in some underfunded but wildly ambitious teen television series. In other words: you must try to survive the ego death of being weird. A weirdo, who doesn't fit in and doesn't want to fit in!

[autistichalsin]

When considering Halsin's polygamy, do you think it is just his way of coping with the scars and traumas of his past? He does admit that monogamy is acceptable, but not for him, and he often talks about roaming. However, the more I play this game, get to know him better, and analyze his character, the more I start to doubt that polygamy is not truly what Halsin wants. He has been through so much - pain, suffering, and torture. What if his polygamy is a shield he uses to protect himself from further pain? Perhaps he has realized that he's fallen in love with Tav and now he is afraid of losing them. Just as you mentioned in your previous post, he is afraid of being alone, rejected, and abandoned.

Just a note- it's polyamory, not polygamy. Polygamy refers specifically to marrying more than one woman.

I absolutely do not in any way, shape, or form, think that he's only polyamorous because of his trauma. Polyamory is who Halsin is. There's a devnote in Halsin's scene that says "sincere- this is a core belief of his."

Wood elves are polyamorous by default. The entire cultural belief is that jealousy is a waste of time, and exploring multiple relationships, as long as all people involved consent, is only natural. That is how he was even before becoming a druid.

This isn't an attack against you, anon, I know you were asking a genuine question in earnest, but I am so beyond tired of people trying to reinterpret all of the polyamorous characters in this game as actually monogamous people who are afraid/broken. Why do people insist on doing this? Is it that hard to conceive of a character with an alternative sexuality who actually is happy that way?

Let's just set aside the characterization reasons and look at it from a pure logical perspective. Halsin is the one to bring up polyamory with the player. He is the one to say this is a fundamental part of who he is. If the player answers that they don't have the same nature as he does and don't want a polyamorous relationship, the relationship doesn't progress. If Halsin was actually just pretending to be poly to avoid being abandoned, why would he not jump in at that point and go "oh, actually I'm okay with a monogamous relationship too, please don't leave?" Why would he be okay with the player leaving over this part of himself if it wasn't actually part of himself, just a lie he told to avoid being left alone? Because poly is who he actually is, not a lie he tells himself to engage in emotional self-harm.

Further, if he was so desperate not to be alone that he would deny who he is, he would actually be more likely to lie about being monogamous, not the other way around. Most people will flat-out refuse poly relationships (because it's not for them) and even call poly people perverts or cheaters. Halsin has probably forewent many other relationships before just because of this fundamental incompatibility. If he was scared of being alone, he would be far likelier to pretend he was happy with one person, so that he would be able to find a partner without navigating that situation, than he would to pretend to be some identity that already makes it harder to find a partner to begin with, and that often causes intense strain on relationships when mismanaged to the point that it can easily be the cause of many relationships ending.

Being poly isn't something you lie about because you want not to be alone- being poly makes it infinitely harder to find a relationship just by its nature.

Halsin is "poly and traumatized" not "poly because he's traumatized." It is absolutely absurd to deny his repeated statements that this is who he is and what he wants. Again, no offense, anon, and I hope this doesn't upset you, but I really have no patience for attempts to dismiss a core part of Halsin's identity as a maladaptive coping mechanism.

[yanderes-galore]

Hey there! It’s me, the 1% of people who reblog your posts.

Anyways, I was watching “Lucario and the Mystery Of Mew.” yesterday, and during that time, I went onto Tumblr and saw your post about requesting, and I thought “Hey. Lucario can telepathically speak, why not send that in as a request?”

Onto my point, may I please request a Platonic/Animal Pet-like concept with Lucario? Really, you may decide the scenario or if it’s a concept, I don’t mind. I mean, it’s just an overprotective talking blue dog.

Still, thank you for reading this, I really appreciate all the effort you put into your work, and I hope you get a nice break after all these requests.

Hello! Nice to see you put in a request ^^ I haven't watched the anime so I am taking your word for it. The most I got from Pokedex entries was it can read thoughts and emotions from beings.

Overprotective! Lucario Concept

Pairing: Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Overprotective behavior, Clingy behavior, Jealousy, Violence implied, Possessive behavior, Dubious companionship.

Pokedex Entries say Lucario can read the thoughts and emotions of living creatures.

They can understand human speech and evolve from Riolu with high friendship during the day.

Pulling from an old idea... Pokemon evolving through high friendship no doubt get the most attached to their trainers compared to wild Pokemon.

Perhaps you originally had a Riolu and evolved them into a Lucario.

Lucario is a fiercely loyal Pokemon who trusts you as their trainer.

They remember you taking care of them as a Riolu, right up until they evolved.

We already know your Lucario can sense your emotions and thoughts.

But speaking through telepathy? Perhaps they can do that too.

An overprotective Lucario would want to keep their trainer happy at all times.

The moment your Lucario senses you're upset... they want to cheer you up!

Something stressing you out? Your Lucario's there!

Seeming sad? Your Lucario presents you a gift!

Seem scared? Someone bothering you? Your Lucario can fix it.

Loyal and dedicated, your Lucario rarely, if ever, leaves your side.

If you seem upset your Lucario tries to use telepathy to speak with you.

They aren't that skilled at it while learning... but they do it enough to hold conversations with you.

At some point your Lucario may not like you around your friends or other Pokemon.

Why do you need them anyways?

Clearly you and your Lucario are best buds!

I think a Lucario would get easily jealous.

They cross their arms and pout when you're focused on another human or Pokemon.

You can practically hear their disinterest in your head.

Even more so when they growl at times.

Your Lucario is clingy, always feeling like they are the best companion for you.

You can't hide anything from your Lucario... they know your thoughts.

They don't want to do anything to harm you.

However... their jealousy may be too great.

They frequently try to make you ignore your other companions.

They try so hard to keep you to themselves.

Soon enough they'll snap... barking and growling at others while preparing Aura attacks.

You try to keep them in the ball, they don't want to stay...

You try to keep them away from others... they never leave your side...

You try to release them...

Your Lucario doesn't leave.

Your Lucario will never leave.

You can't get rid of them now... you're too close...

Your Lucario plans to stay by your side...

Even if it means it has to get rid of all those you care about to have you back.

[how2loa]

What to do when you feel like you don't deserve the life of your dreams? I have a lot of desires and I really want them but I feel like life is telling me that I have a good life and that I shouldn't want. Am I ambitious? also for a past that I had and that I want to review

HOW2LOA : stop limiting yourself !

this post will be a bit of a pep talk not only for you anon but also for anyone who is doubting their abilities, what they should and shouldn’t have, what’s too ambitious.

first of all, there is never “too ambitious”. manifesting or not, i do not believe that dreams can be too wild, ideas can be too crazy or goals can be too ambitious. even if something hasn’t been done yet, you can be the first one to make it happen.

secondly, if you have doubts like this (which are very normal because we are humans and humans have logical thoughts stop beating yourself up!!!), perhaps you need a refresher on what the law is and how it works. manifesting is your birthright. it’s something you cannot avoid doing because it is part of how life and consciousness work. there is no reason you could name that could make me think you are not deserving of something. in any case, who decides what you do and do not deserve? whatever you believe in god, universe, other higher power- they are all within you. you decide. you decide the exact same way you decide what is wrong or right, what you like and dislike, what is true or false. it is all you. you hold the power, you are the source of everything.

you can still be grateful and appreciative of what you have now and still want more. it is part of human nature to desire. you are not ungrateful or too ambitious for wanting to elevate your life. it is in your nature to desire things, as it is in your nature to receive them. grant yourself your desires. because you already have them! forget about time, logic, limits. you have what you want now. the moment you desire it it becomes yours. that is how powerful you are. the only reason you might not be able to experience it in the present moment is because you are using your senses to dictate what you have and what is real.

you are the only one keeping you and your desire in separation. you’re not being punished or tested so stop getting in your own way. accept your power, stop limiting yourself and embrace the control you have over your life. life doesn’t happen to you, you shape your life to meet your desires. why would you settle for something you are not happy with? be a little stubborn! this is your life and you are blessed to know you have the control. so would you rather try to settle while unhappy because you are scared of wanting “too much” or would you rather accept who you really are and your capabilities and get everything you ever wanted? it is your choice. but remember, you are always manifesting.

[astroyongie]

Hey girlie! Can you write an angst for Seventeen Jeonghan please?

Thanks ❤️

-> warnings: Jeonghan x reader, mentions of mingyu x reader, angst, slight violence, mentions of cheating, mentions of smut.

It was inevitable. 

You had been in a relationship with Mingyu for the past 2 years. 

Jeonghan had been in a relationship with that girlfriend of his, for the past 2 and a half. 

But nothing could have prepared you for the unhealthy obsession you created within each other. You and Mingyu suffered a lot in your relationship, mostly because you had a hard time controlling Mingyu and his behaviors that were often problematic and suspicious. You doubt of his honesty but not once had you confronted him about it. You loved him. On the other side, Jeonghan loved his partner equally. Hell, he wanted to marry her. But something in you made him want to throw it all away.

The first time you both slept with each other was during last year’s tour. Both of you had come for a drink, after a heated argument with your partners. One drink turned into two and eventually into six and when you noticed, you were allowing Jeonghan to fuck you from behind. 

You had come twice that night, you had allowed this man to drink you up like a cocktail in the desert. And it happened again. Without Mingyu knowing, you had allowed his friend to enter your life. Quite literally. He had been there through the fights, through your teary sides. Jeonghan had drawn soft patterns against your skin as you talked to him, and listened to your breathing as you laid on top of him. He had seen that vulnerable part of you, that even Mingyu didn't had the privilege to. 

The worst was that you loved it. And you hated yourself for it. 

And Jeonghan loved you for it.

As you cried out from the orgasm washing over you, as Jeonghan groaned into your ear. You closed your eyes, enjoying the bittersweet feeling of your high as you felt him slip out and slowly lying by your side. Today has been hell. Mingyu had gone on vacation with Minghao, somewhere to Bali, next to the beach. He hadn’t texted you nor called you for the past 24h and you were scared of the worst. 

Ironic, considering that you had just allowed his friend to nut inside of you, for the 7th time. 

“We need to stop seeing each other” you murmured softly, not able to look at Jeonghan.

“You say that every time”

“I am serious, Jeonghan. I think.. I think Mingyu is catching up” 

Jeonghan went quiet as you spoke. He felt his heart tight, perhaps because he had started to grow close to you, perhaps because he had started to love the lingering perfume on his skin, the soft moans of your voice, or the way your fingertips felt against his scalp. 

“That would hurt” he said back, breathing accelerated from the post-release high.

“It would.”

He went silent again, considering your words carefully. He knew you were right. But he couldn’t help but be selfish. 

"Why do we always have to hurt each other like this?" he asked, 

"Because we don't belong to one another" you simply said. Jeonghan felt his heart twist at those words, jealousy creeping in. He wasn’t your boyfriend, and it seemed like he would never be. A simple bandaid, the same you were to him. 

So why did letting you go hurt so much?

[cosmicaces]

i've never been good at writing intros to posts and that isn't gonna change today, esp since only a handful of people are probably gonna read this. i am making this post for me, because this is something i noticed and i wanna talk about it. leave it to me to make a detailed post about a character from a movie from three years ago.

rody has pstd! let's talk about it

[ID: A screenshot from MHA: World Heroes' Mission. Rody is pointing at Deku, winking. Deku looks annoyed. End ID.]

to preface this:

i am not a professional 👍 i have ptsd 👍

analyzing characters is fun for me! this is how i am interpreting rody with what i know about him from the little media he's been in + some additional speculation. feel free to incorporate this into your belief system. or not! all that i ask is that you bear with me.

now, before i get into it (preface...2!):

everyone knows about fight or flight, right? well, did you know that there are actually 5 trauma responses? fight, flight, freeze, fawn, and flop. (there may be more, but these are the ones that have the most information on them.)

fight and flight are the body's primary responses to a bad situation. freeze, fawn, and flop are more complex responses that happen when the first two aren't available. little self-explanatory, but for the sake of infodumping:

freeze: the body is in a state of hyperarousal. the muscles are tight and ready for action but is ultimately paralyzed. think of a deer in headlights.

fawn/befriend/submit: this response involves complying/befriending the aggressor; people-pleasing in an effort to remain safe. this is more common in cases of abuse.

flop/shutdown/collapse: the body is in a state of hypoarousal, aka its shutting down; muscles go slack, brain stops receiving sensory info. this can often result in fainting. you know how some people faint when they see blood? or when they're on a rollercoaster? yeah, it's this.

it's important to have this context. as a matter of fact, you probably already know where i'm going with this:

rody faints when deku is climbing up the bridge. of course, right? he had reached such a heightened level of fear that, when his brain realized it couldn't trigger one of the other four responses, he just... flopped. why bring this up? well, and i think this is easy to miss, but rody didn't pass out once. he actually passed out twice.

when they first reached the train, it appears that, in their brief moment of safety, rody had collapsed.

[ID: Deku picks up Rody to shield him from Beros's oncoming arrow attack. End ID.]

[ID: Deku is carrying Rody, swinging under the bridge in an effort to evade Beros's attacks. At the end, Rody appears as though he is coming to. End ID.]

up until this point, rody had been freaking out during their escape from the police. for him to have no initial response to being physically moved by deku... hell, he looks like he's just coming to. if we're going based off of the dub, he even yells "what's happening?!" simply put: he shut down and, more specifically, he shut down in what had been perceived as a moment of respite.

the reason i point this out is because, while we don't choose our trauma responses, there are events that can impact what they can be.

so... what is the purpose of the flop response?

quoting from an article here, but it's thought to help people in three different ways: to reduce the mental impact of the circumstances, to cause a physical disconnect (thus experiencing the trauma less directly), and to prevent additional assault.

the point i'm trying to make here is, well...

[ID: A flashback showing Rody protecting his siblings. A villain strikes him with a pipe. End ID.]

rody's been assaulted! and this is only one instance that we know of. we don't fully know what he's had to go through when providing for his siblings, but there is no doubt that there have been negative repercussions on his mentality.

did you notice how he startles easily?

[ID: Rody puts his hand on Deku's shoulder, scaring him. His response startles Rody, causing him to flinch backwards. End ID.]

[ID: Bakugou suddenly appears behind Rody, causing him to jump. He flinches back, turning to face him. Pino is also startled, flying to sit over on his other shoulder. End ID.]

with ptsd, some people can develop an exaggerated startle response. this happens when your nervous system gets stuck in survival mode. your brain is hypervigilant; any sudden sound or movement that you don't expect can make you feel like you're in danger and your body has to be ready to react in a given moment.

look at the difference between how deku and rody flinch. deku has a standard flinch, but rody violently flinches, almost as though he's been struck. do you see how he moves his head? his arms? how, after both instances, he's starting to sweat? yeah 👍

continuing along this line of thinking, let's talk about rody's attempted betrayal.

[ID: Rody being approached by the oni villain. He braces himself for the attack, clutching at his head. End ID.]

i feel like most people, when cornered and under the imminent threat of being attacked, try to block it or defend from it in some way. rody... didn't do that. as a matter of fact, it looks like he's trying to hide.

[ID: Deku runs towards Rody, shielding him from an arrow. Rody panics and turns away. End ID.]

additionally, in this scene, rody is apologizing. in this moment, he sincerely believed that deku was going to hurt him for his betrayal. instead of trying to run, he just... froze. braced himself again. i know he was very scared, but, despite deku having just saved him, seeing his fear at being approached... psychologically, there's something else going on here.

i think rody had been re-traumatized.

again, we only have that one flashback regarding a violent encounter with villains, but i genuinely have reason to believe that it wasn't a one-off scenario. the only reason rody tried to fight was to defend his siblings. they are his reason for continuing forward. but... what if there were times when they weren't there? and he had to face the villains by himself?

... yeah. i think that's why he responded the specific way that he did. his life was actively in danger, yes, but how many times had he been in that position? pleading, trying to garner sympathy about his siblings, wanting to be let go? i think the severity of his psychological distress in that instant is what caused him to try and hide rather than attempt to minimize any incoming damage.

as for feeling threatened by deku, that can be easily explained, too. rody talked quite a bit about betrayal, it seemed like a very natural thing to talk about. he's probably had to betray some villains and gotten hurt for it. honestly, you could probably argue that this contributed to his confusion regarding deku protecting him instead.

similarly with starting posts, i am also very bad at ending them 👍

tldr; rody soul has ptsd as a result of his encounters with villains after his father's disappearance. this has given him an exaggerated startle response as well as both a freeze/collapse response in times where his life is threatened. who knows what other symptoms he may have! what we can say for sure is that this kid needs therapy.

if you read all this, thanks! i hope you enjoyed me dissecting him like a bug.

[captain-mj]

09Soapghost heellll yeah. Captain MacTavish going uno reverse and going aha now you can’t get rid of me. Prepare to be made to heel

You got the psychic messages I was adding to the post

It started with the interrogation. That was it. With Ghost breaking that person down to nothing with Soap's help. If Soap gave a suggestion, which he did only when he wasn't sure he could stomach doing it himself so rarely, Ghost would do it.

Right now, he was running a flame over one of his knives, no doubt about to do something awful with it while Soap sat in front of the guy, waiting for the fear to build enough for him to back down.

And when Ghost put the burning red knife next to his eye, swaying it slightly like he might just drop it on him, he broke. He blabbered on and on and on about this and that and whatever. Soap took the important things down.

"Can I see my wife?"

Soap was just about to answer when Ghost did. He never spoke during things like this. Not wanting people to hear his voice. But Price had told him to kill the guy afterward and that was enough for him to not care. "Yeah. You can see her." He cocked his gun and put it between his eyes.

"My wife isn't dead." The man looked angry.

"Course she is. Suicide to be exact. Apparently a couple of our boys got a little rough. Made some comments. I wonder, did she kill herself to prevent being defiled or because she was afraid of being used against you? Which one? Did she love your country more than you? Just like you did her."

The man started to curse and sob and bitch in Russian.

Ghost let him for a moment, enjoying this Soap realized, before moving the sunglasses to the top of his head to uncover his eyes. "Look me in the eyes. I want to see you die."

The gunshot was loud and it echoed. And Ghost put the gun back in place.

"His wife is safe and sound in a house not too far from here. Why did you lie?"

"So when he gets to whatever afterlife there is, he searches for her for years, not know she just isn't there yet. I like the think the grim reaper is in on the joke and plays along."

"You're a sick fucking bastard." Soap said and meant it.

Ghost looked at him. And those eyes... stone cold dead. Nothing fucking there. On anyone else, they'd be gorgeous. Beautiful browns like several of the sweet little things Soap picked up at bars. But there was not a hint of emotion in those things at all. "You know I am."

That's when Soap realized that Ghost was a little feral. Demented even. Something was Fucking wrong with him.

It didn’t scare him as much as it should. His head gets a little fuzzy at the thought actually.

There were other moments. Times where Ghost would be a little more fucked up around him. Letting Soap catch him licking one of his knives or purposely dragging out someone's death for his own pleasure.

Somehow it was made worse by the moments of Ghost's humanity. HIs humming. His inane way of making tea and how he disliked coffee and his stupid jokes. It was at such odds with the way he looked at him, dangerous and mutant.

Until Soap found himself cornered by Ghost who was trying to tower over him despite their size difference being laughably small. Only an inch or so. And his shoulders weren't that bad, but they weren't much against his own. Riley just wasn't doing a good job of being intimidating, especially considering Soap had seen him do far better with enemies.

"MacTavish." He growled at him.

Soap looked at him. "Simon. Heel, boy."

Ghost stared at him blankly, only those dead black eyes looking at him.

"You're not getting rid of me, Simon. So go ahead and get used to it."

He scoffed like Johnny was the dumbest motherfucker ever. "You don't own me. Can't tell me what to do."

"Heel, Simon." Soap whispered at him, patting his side. "You're not going to get my attention like this."

Riley growled at him again.

"That's your problem. Can barely touch ya. You hide under that mask like a coward. So you skulk around and hope I'll kick you away."

Riley made a ragged noise and almost barked at him. "Fuck you."

"I'll kick you when I want." Soap hissed and shoved him to the side, noticing how he moved so easily.

That exchange was why he didn't feel as much as surprise as one would expect to find Ghost unmasked in his room late at night, knife in hand.

Soap looked at Riley, watching his breathing as ragged as it was. Looking at how he looked defenseless despite holding a knife. He flipped it in his fingers and held out the handle.

“Captain, I’d let you do anything to me.” His tone was steady, even maybe a tad breathless. There was no hesitation or pain in the admittance.

Soap frowned at him but his interest was undeniable piqued. “Anything I wanted?” He took the knife and dragged it along his jugular. Just letting him feel it.

It was the first break in the facade. A small painful sound. “Yes. Anything. I’m sorry.”

“Why?”

“For giving you this burden.” Ghost choked out. “Anything you want.”

Soap shouldn’t push. He knew Ghost didn’t say things like this lightly. But he did anyway. “Even sex? I know how you are.”

Ghost shivered but it wasn’t from fear. His pupils were blown and he reacted like he had not considered this option. “I haven't had sex in years. But if it would please you. I’d let you fuck me however you want. Even if it’s the same way they did. Even if it's worse. As long as it's you."

“You’d let me kill you.” Soap waited for something. A survival instinct of some kind. But Ghost licked his pretty lips.

“Johnny, if you asked, I’d beg you to. If that’s what you wanted.”

“Beg.”

Ghost gently grabbed the wrist that was controlling the knife as it went further down but still didn’t cut. He just needed the stability. “Please. Whatever you want. You want me dead? Do it. I’ll write up a note saying i asked for it. You want me kill someone for you and I will. Bleed me dry, Johnny. I’ll enjoy it.”

Soap looked at where he was clearly hard in his pants. “Should I get you off first?”

“If you think I deserve it.” Ghost exposed his throat for him, swallowing.

The knife hit the floor and Soap kissed him properly. Really kissed him. He dragged him up and out of the chair. Ghost sobbed against his mouth but he ignored it, instead laying him out over his desk.

Soap wasn’t cruel. He could be stern and mean but cruelness was never his thing. And in this moment, he wished nothing more to be cruel. To be able to rend Ghost down in a way that he clearly needed.

Instead, he undid his belt. "Simon."

"Yes, sir?" Ghost looked at him, biting his lip delicately.

"I am going to fuck you. Gonna let you sit there and just feel it. Be real good to you. And when I'm done, you're going to warm my cock under my desk."

Ghost softened, eyelashes fluttering. If not for the scars, he'd be model material. But Soap preferred him with the scars. "Thank you."

He kept lotion at his desk, something that Gaz usually teased him over, but it was perfect for right now. Using a generous amount to make it easier for him. One finger in and he already felt tighter than anything else Soap had fucked in... ever. "You weren't kidding. Practically a virgin huh?"

Ghost tensed up and Soap could feel it around his finger. "Hey, it's okay. I like it. Feels like I'm getting to break you in."

A sweet moan. "Yes. You want me to tell you how big you feel? I know you're probably packing. I'll even exaggerate. Tell you how you're breaking me."

"Only if that's what it really feels like." Soap assured, realizing just how much of a freak Ghost was. And subsequently how much of a freak he was himself, because this was all getting him going. Still, he worked him open until he could easily take three fingers and the lotion was starting to overflow.

Soap knew what he had. He had been turned down by a partner or two because of the size. And the way Ghost arched to keep taking it. Thighs trembling. It gave him a sense of satisfaction.

"I don't need to make you crave me. You already do."

"Yes, sir." He sounded strained but he managed the words.

"How do you feel?"

Ghost put his forehead against the soft wood. "Like you're breaking me." He shook and sobbed, but Soap knew if he pulled that pretty head up and made him look at him, there wouldn't actually be any tears.

A slow gentle push and pull. Soap didn't mind, the tightness and the pressure doing everything he needed. Ghost never asked for more. Though if it was because he was pleased, it was too much or he'd only take what he was being given was a mystery.

He abused his prostate. Mentally tallied how many times he hit it dead on as Ghost's body betrayed him. Causing his hips to cant up for more or his body to thrash until he fell against the desk like his strings had been cut.

And then Soap felt the tell tale tightening around his cock. Rhythmic and still desperate. "You came?"

Ghost nodded against the desk but didn't show his face. The back of his neck was a bright red.

"So the dead can blush."

Soap sped up a little, focusing on his own pleasure, and Ghost would clench every time he went all the way in, and then he came too. Deep inside so Ghost would struggle to clean it out.

Ghost got up and got on his knees. Soap gave him his shirt back so he wouldn't be half dressed.

"My life is yours." Simon Riley mumbled to him and the look he gave him was the same dead eyed stare as always.

Soap smiled at him anyway. "Thank you. It's a gift I'll appreciate."

For a brief moment, there seemed to be something like contentment in Ghost's eyes before closing his eyes and starting his job of pleasing his Captain.

[givemeuniversalcrossovers]

Soooooooooo......???

Seeing doubles amiright?, like, wow that's familiar oh yea it looks near identical to my besties art that was posted earlier this year, I mean maybe the heads the other way it can't be THAT copy pasted I so thought

Hm. Yea it IS that bad, now, I've not seen the movie in a long time but I am 99% sure that is not a pose from the genesect movie so it's not referenced from there

"But they have different art styles!" I mean pretty sure using an image as reference without consent or credit but altering it for your art style still infringes on copyright and the original image made by the original artist. And you're really gonna look at me with the art side by side and go well duh the art style is different even if they're near identical so can't be stolen (you can still, steal something while having a different artstyle???)

"but the head is the other way and the hands are closed!" and the posing is the exact same the angle is the exact same the mouth open the sternums pointing similarly the definition of the chest in illusion to chest plate

And as well the minor differences look pretty deliberate imo? Can't copy the exact posing 1 for 1 as somebody (read nobody (save for me bitches cause I'm pissed) since people don't like to call out bigger popular artists for things like this and just let it slide because 'wellll we like this artist better so they can steal allllll the time~!' which guys popular or not it ain't fucking on), but yea can't just do the exact same so alter just enough to make it pass off as original (didn't work literally saw it in passing and clocked it right away and had to scramble to check and make a comparison refer my beloathed)

I just wanna know like, why? What the fuck? And I know swearing might damage my point but, just, I can't stand seeing or hearing about my friends getting treated like this having their original content taken and warped by other people who know to some degree they can get away with it, it's gross, if you wanna take inspiration you credit that appropriately hell even ask permission and respect if the og artist says no.

I don't think this panel should've been made or it should've been a helluv a lot different. Things like this is exactly the reason I'm scared to share my original ideas online, in case it gets taken and used specifically by this artist because I genuinely can't trust them at this point from what I've seen I don't want my ideas to be taken and then be brushed off with a "oh I've always wanted to play with this idea/it's always been implied actually! Don't look into why it's only showed up now after somebody made a post about their ocs with the same idea" cause being the lesser content creator guess what? I'll be the insane one if I say anything, I'll be told I'm wrong and have people jump my content claiming I've stolen or something because that's unfortunately how the Internet works! I've already had my works warped in a way I cant really even talk about! I know I'd probably look mad or like I was grasping at straws if I said anything then or now and at the time I valued my safety my comfort online and enjoyment online over saying anything and hey maybe I was wrong and the ideas were simply similar, but I doubt it. I know I could dig up and provide my references at least for my work, at the time when asked they couldn't do the same.

But this is my friend, and I'm not gonna let this shit slide anymore, I know this isn't the first thing this artist has, 'taken inspiration from' I use with heavy quotation marks, and I hope to fuck it's the last. But I don't know. I'm not gonna sit in silence about it anymore though, I will be calling it out as I see.

Plugging other people's artwork and original ideas character designs traits ect into your own to replicate to boost your own art makes you no better than ai art, because it takes without consent and spits out something warped and stolen.

This might come off as angry and petty and bitter, because it is, but don't mistake that for jealousy, I don't want what they have I'm not talking about this like a jealous ex trying to sabotage their fame because I know this is probably gonna damage my online rep and experience far more than theirs (or maybe I'll be lucky and this will become a tumbleweed in the desert) I'm talking about this because I want this kind of behaviour to stop. More popular 'better' artists shouldn't get free reign to plagiarise and pocket concepts from smaller artists just because they can, my friends content is not your fucking strawberry patch to plunder, it's not yours to take ANYTHING from. Make your own fucking original content. You've got your fame. Stop taking from us, leave us alone.

[aliceintheworld]

PURE ATTRACTION | JJK | TATTOO ARTIST

Pairing: TattooArtistJungkook X NaiveReader

Summary: " I shouldn’t be watching a man undressing, especially not from the house next door."

Warning: Fluff, kiss, impure thoughts, conversation about sex, masturbation, doubts and more doubts.

A/N: Here I am. As a thank you for all the wonderful comments, I will post two chapters today. (To be honest, I already have some stories in mind, but I want to finish Pure Attraction first, so I need to do it a little bit faster.) Keep interacting and voting. Don't forget: VOTE! It brings engagement and more motivation for the author!

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Chapter 8

I wave to my mother inside the car, as she reverses in front of our house and leaves, driving down the street of our neighborhood. Eunji works at a medium-sized company and travels a lot for a few months of the year, when she needs to present a new project. It's not new to me. I am used to being alone for some days; what makes me think, however, is Jungkook. I look at my neighbors' house out of inertia, seeing him at the living room window, reading some book. He notices me, opens a mischievous little smile, and waves, winking. My cheeks burn with his attention, and before I can embarrassed myself, in any way, I close the door and quickly step inside.

I still can't believe what happened last night. It feels like an unreal dream. If I didn't have marks and hickeys on my neck and breasts, I would have accepted that it was all a figment of my imagination and that Jungkook and I didn't end up together. I feel scared because I don't regret it and want it to happen again. I don't know where I'm getting myself into, and each time we meet, I sink deeper and deeper into this situation. I feel apprehensive because what I feel for him, I've never felt for anyone else. His kiss when he said goodbye, his dark and big eyes on mine... Just remembering it makes me shiver.

I start to organize myself because I need to take a look at the thrift store. It's been a while since I last went there, and I don't know how is doing. My day goes by quickly, and I return a bit earlier than expected because the movement wasn't very good. I attended to three customers, and only two of them bought something. I climb the stairs at home, tired and hungry, my stomach growling because I didn't even have lunch. I throw myself on the bed and close my eyes, not caring about the heavy clothes I'm wearing. I could sleep even in a costume, that nothing would disturb my sleep. I take off my sneakers with my feet and sigh, relieved to be home.

A few minutes pass when I feel fingers on my thigh, lifting my denim skirt towards my intimacy. I jump up, startled, when I see Jungkook on his knees on my mattress, his face close to mine. He laughs, noticing my surprise, doesn't say a word, and simply kisses me, brushing his lips against mine. I savor his taste in my mouth, silently asking him to deepen the caress and use his tongue with mine; however he pulls away, gives me a peck and another, before standing up completely.

"I could call the police." I joke, brushing the short hair from his face. The haircut is not much different from the previous one, but it makes him look more handsome, if that's even possible.

"I do everything with consent." He mocks, lying down beside me.

"I didn't give you any consent to come into my room. How did you get in?"

"The open window was very inviting. I couldn't resist." He shrugs, smiling.

"Why did you come here?" I raise my head, focused on his rosy lip when he pouts.

"I came to get you." Jungkook says, stretching on the bed. He lifts my right leg, caressing my skin. "And that's not a request."

"I don't even know where you want to take me." I comment, swallowing hard. I laugh a little, feeling the tickles from the tips of his fingers. "And I'm tired. I worked at my mother's store and at the library. And today is Tuesday. I'm dead."

"Your mother went traveling, didn't she? Enjoy it while she's not home."

"How do you know she traveled?" I raise an eyebrow, curious.

"She told my mom some time ago." He shrugs, as if it's simple.

"She only told me last night." I growl, irritated. My mother always does this, telling me her plans always at the last minute.

"I thought you knew. That's why I came here. When the king is in the castle, one cannot court the Princess. Everyone knows that."

"In this case, I would be the Princess?" I laugh, finding it funny.

"Yes. You are definitely Rapunzel. Have you noticed that your life is literally living in a tower?"

"I'm touched."

"It's serious. Come with me." Jungkook asks, whispering, squeezing my thigh. I smile knowing that, the way he asks, I'll never be able to say no. I sigh and roll my eyes.

"You convinced me. Tell me where we're going."

"It's not a very surprising place." He speaks carelessly; suddenly, his cheeks turn red, and he pinches the lobe of his ear, embarrassed. That makes me even more curious. I wonder what he plans, and even though I'm tired, I nod and get up from the bed.

"Alright, you made me curious. But I'm hungry and need to eat something before we go." I say, wrapping my arms around his neck. I kiss his lips in a quick peck, tasting him. A voice in my head tells me I shouldn't act so affectionately because I'm not his girlfriend –or anything like that –but the way Jungkook responds quiets that voice and reassures me it's ok to touch him like this.

"I'll order something for you to eat." He smiles simply. Before I can argue, he crouches down, takes my foot, and pulls off my sneaker. I watch everything, worried and fascinated, relaxing my leg so he can finish the task.

I really like Jungkook. I've admitted that, and it's not very hard to notice. I did things with him because he makes me feel confident in my own skin, and that does me good. He is funny, talented, kind and sarcastic, and even though I don't know him well, the things I know about him make me admire him. The problem is he might still love his ex, and I don't know how far I can unleash my own feelings. I'm afraid of having too many expectations and ending up frustrated and disappointed. He treats me very well, but does that mean he reciprocates what I feel, or does it just mean he is a gentleman who knows how to take care of a woman?

"Done." He says, finishing the knot of my shoelace.

I smile at him gratefully and feel his hand holding mine as we walk down the stairs. I lose a bit of my smile, seeing our fingers intertwined, but I say nothing. I promise myself that I will enjoy the moment and keep my paranoia to myself, for now.

"Are you really not going to tell me where we're going?" I ask when we reach the sidewalk. He shakes his head and laughs before stepping away.

"No. You'll have to wait a little." He replies, opening the gate to his parents' garage. I stand still, waiting for his car when I'm surprised to see Jungkook on a motorcycle, with another helmet on his right arm. I open my mouth, totally impressed, looking from end to end at how huge the thing is. Now I understand why Mr. Jeon was worried, when he mentioned his son's mean of transportation, last night at dinner.

"Shall we?"

"I've never been on a motorcycle." I comment weakly, afraid of falling before I even get on the back.

"Everything has a first time." Jungkook bites his lower lip, watching me mischievously. My face heats up when I remember he said the same thing to me, when I sucked his dick in my room.

"Jungkook, how long have you been riding this thing? Did you pass your practical test on the first try?" I ask, sarcastically. He laughs, rolling his eyes.

"I promise you will come out alive from this." He guarantees with cynicism. He stands up, turns around, and goes behind me. "I'll tie your hair up, wait a bit."

I wait patiently while he holds my rebellious strands and ties them with some elastic. Jungkook takes the helmet from his arm and looks back at my face. He seems super focused and serious, furrowing his brows and making sure my head is indeed protected. He gives a little smile and sits on the motorcycle, waiting for my turn. I am a bit awkward, not quite sure where to support myself, but Jungkook doesn't mind and holds my leg so I can settle in securely. I wrap my arms around his waist, and with my heart racing, I wave between his shoulder and neck.

"We can go." I confirm, uncertain. Almost at the same moment, Jungkook revs the engine and takes off down the street at speed. I hold on tighter to him, tense. I hear his laugh and know he did this on purpose to tease me. I hit his arm, pouting, and sigh, feeling the nice end-of-day breeze.

It's scary, fascinating and a fantastic moment. With the motorcycle rolling, I can follow the sunset, which transforms the blue sky into orange and the usually polluted air, into something purer and cleaner. It's a feeling of freedom, enjoyable and terrifying, the same I have every time I'm with Jungkook. I hold on tighter, happy for the new experience I'm living.

It doesn't take long before the motorcycle stops in the city center. Things are quite busy, with people walking from one place to another and the stores bustling with customers. I can't remember the last time I came here, even though it's so close to my house. I get off awkwardly, and Jungkook follows right behind, taking off his helmet.

"It's here." He smiles happily, pointing behind me. When I turn around, there's a large sign saying "GOLDEN TATTOO" with Jungkook's name, on a seemingly new and well-lit wall. "I managed to finish the renovation today, and I wanted to bring you here to see the place. You'll be the first person to come."

"It's perfect!" I sight, impressed. I'm left speechless as he opens the bulletproof glass and enters the place, as if he were familiar with the environment. It's different from what I expected, with gray-painted walls, plants everywhere, and illustrated designs in large frames. It's a place I would feel comfortable in, even if I came alone. "Did you decorate it?"

"Yes. These last few days, I worked with a design team to organize everything the way I envisioned it. It took a lot of work, but I think it's finally all ready."

"It's very beautiful." I smile, touching one of the frames on the wall. It's a tattoo of an eye, apparently feminine and brown. It's so realistic that it feels like it's looking in my direction. I analyze the drawing so much that Jungkook laughs, lowering his head.

"Did you like it?" He points to the frame, smiling. I nod, touching the picture.

"It's spectacular."

"I drew it." He explains, coming up behind me. My heart skips a few beats when his arms wrap around my waist, and he presses his mouth against my ear. My spine freezes, and I get all goosebumps, from the last strand of my hair to the tips of my toes. "Come here, I want to show you something."

He pulls my hand and guides me to a room with white walls, some utensils and machines that, even as a layperson, I know are for tattooing. It's a very clean and sterilized place, with masks, disposable gloves, and colored inks in a glass and wood cabinet. The almost obsessive organization doesn't surprise me. When I saw Jungkook's apartment some time ago, I realized he likes everything very well organized, and his workplace wouldn't be any different. He sits me on the waiting sofa, and I observe some drawings in a black folder on the coffee table.

I don't know many people with tattoos, and I've never taken the time to appreciate this type of art, but I like what Jungkook does. He creates realistic designs, but most of them have fine and delicate touches. It's interesting to get to know another one of his sides that makes me more enchanted by him every day. I glance at my phone, thinking of my mother suddenly. I shake my head, determined to expel my restlessness. All these worries don't matter right now. She's out of town, and I need to stop tormenting myself about her. Jungkook appears at the door, almost as if he knew I was lost in thought, and smiles at me, mysteriously.

"What do you want to show me? I'm almost going crazy with curiosity." I confess, excited. He smiles, holding a roll of plastic wrap in one hand and raising a tablet in the other.

"I'm going to end your curiosity now." He says. "It's nothing special. I'm just going to do a tattoo on myself."

"What? Another one? Didn't you do one the day before yesterday?" I exclaim, opening my mouth in disbelief. He laughs at my surprise, as if he had said the most ordinary thing in the world.

"I've done tattoos on myself a few times; it's not a big deal. And I have to take advantage because the healing time is always restrict with food."

"Don't you feel pain while doing it?"

"I do." He confirms, shrugging. "But it's not unbearable, and I can stay still the whole time."

"Are you some kind of masochist?" I tease, watching him. Jungkook wraps the plastic around the tattoo machine and on the bench beside me without pausing.

"It's a nice pain." He smiles slyly, licking his lower lip. "It's almost like when I spank your butt. Don't you feel pleasure when there's a bit of it?"

"Jungkook!" I reprimand, my face burning with embarrassment at the question. He really has no scruples. And neither do I, because I hate to admit it, but I actually enjoy it when he spanks me.

"Some types of pain are bearable and nice to feel. You should try it." He suggests, sitting beside me.

"No, thanks." I decline. Just the thought of a needle piercing me, makes me anxious.

"Scaredy-cat." He mocks. He raises the tablet and shows me the drawing. It's a pink, reddish flower. It's a beautiful and interesting drawing, but apparently painful if done by oneself. I grimace, pitying him.

"What does it mean?" His face turns red suddenly. He looks at his hands and bites his lips, thoughtful.

"It's the flower of my birth. The tiger flower." He diverts his gaze from mine, leaving me confused.

"What is it?" I ask, laughing. Generally, I'm the shy one in the relationship.

"It's nothing; it's just that... it means 'please, love me.' I think that phrase is so beautiful and, at the same time, so sad."

"Please, love me." I repeat, testing the words on my tongue. It really is sad but touching. I wonder, however, why he chose that tattoo. "Are you sure you can handle it?" I question, worried, somewhat skeptical. Jungkook turns completely to me and narrows his dark eyes, looking at me.

"Of course I can. Don't doubt my abilities."

"I'm not doubting." I explain, putting my hands in front of my body to defend myself. "It's just that it's a drawing with many details. It's normal for you not to be able to do something like that in a short time. It's already seven."

"Let's make a bet?" He suggests, brushing his hair from his face. I get excited about the proposal, nodding my head.

"Sure, why not? But what can we bet on?"

"If I can't finish the tattoo in two hours, you choose something for us to do together." The dark-haired boy explains, running his fingers on my thigh. A shiver runs up my spine as he trails his fingers on my skin, slowly lifting my skirt with ease.

"Do something together? Like what?" I frown, curious. He smiles, this time wickedly. His hand goes from my thighs to my neck, pulling my hair back. He entwines his fingers in my strands and caresses my scalp with his thumb. A breath of arousal escapes my mouth, beyond my control.

"Anything. You decide."

"And if you win the bet, you do whatever you want with me?" I tease, laughing at my own question. Jungkook doesn't deny it, however, looking at me with a serious expression that, if it weren't for the situation, would disturb me.

"I already know what I want." He says in a husky voice. "If I win the bet, you touch yourself in front of me, like I asked you to."

"J-Jungkook! I can't do that." I choke, shaking my head. I would die of embarrassment. I've tried a few times to touch myself, I confess, but I never succeeded. I always felt awkward, as if something was missing. As if I were a complete weirdo for even trying.

"Are you already thinking about losing? That's not how bets work."

"I've never bet on something like this." I laugh ironically, trembling. His hand releases my hair but doesn't stop touching me. He slides his palm further down and caresses my stomach, which bubbles because of him. I'm so entranced by his touch that I can't stop him and let Jungkook slip under my shirt, heading for my breasts, covered by my bra.

"Think of the other side. If I lose, you can do whatever you want with me." He argues quietly, giving a small smile.

I start imagining what I would do with him if I won the bet. I'm not very creative, but something that really excites me would be to bring him to the edge just like he did with me last night. He denied my orgasm, and I want to do the same with Jungkook, over and over again. Of course, I would have to be very confident, and I don't know if I could achieve my goal, but I think it's worth a try.

"Alright. I agree." I nod nervously. He approaches with a sideways smile and tucks my hair behind my ear, before closing his eyes and kissing my mouth.

I wrap my arms around his neck and deepen our kiss, massaging his mouth with mine. I bite his lower lip, only satisfied when I hear a rumble from him deep in his throat. He smirks between caresses, stops, and attacks my neck, licking my skin and leaving a thin trail of saliva. Weeks ago, I couldn't even imagine a man without clothes in front of me, and now all I want is to suck him off and feel him come in my mouth, just like last night. I still remember the result of his pleasure flowing down my throat, and my desire to repeat everything we did makes my brain intoxicated. I'm completely lost in wanting this man.

"A kiss to seal the deal." Jungkook grunts and pulls away, his mouth swollen. I try to continue the kiss with the excitement eating me from the inside out, but he smiles and stops touching me completely. "I have to start this tattoo if I want to win the bet."

Jungkook stands up and sketches the rose on a piece of paper. My head disconnects from reality while he begins the work. I pick up my phone for a few seconds and see the time passing. I would be more worried if my mother weren't out of town. I leave the sofa, needing to pee, and open a door marked for the bathroom. I take care of my business and look at myself in the mirror. My face looks apparently normal, if not for my flushed cheeks and red lips from the kisses. I splash a bit of water on myself, and when I feel calmer, I return to the tattoo studio. The machine works continuously, and Jungkook seems submerged and engrossed in his task, furrowing his brows, totally focused.

I shouldn't have accepted this bet. Jungkook has several tattoos, and it's obvious that his pain tolerance is high. I know he will win. The way he remains silent and effortlessly pierces his own skin tells me that sooner or later, I'll have to fulfill the difficult challenge. I bite my lip, watching the drawing of the flower being completed as the minutes pass. It's a very time-consuming process, but minutes fly. I am so relaxed and still that I could almost fall asleep listening to the buzzing of the needle.

"Y/N, I ordered food for both of us." I hear his voice suddenly. I jump a bit because I didn't notice he was talking to me, lost in my own head. "I hope you like pasta."

"I really like it, thanks." I say, shaking my head. I'm really hungry.

Before long, someone rings the studio's doorbell. Jungkook even tries to get up to answer the delivery person, but there's no way I'd let him go outside when he's so focused on his own work. I go outside and grab the food bag, seeing that he ordered beer, pasta, fries, and a can of Diet Coke for both of us. I'm happy to notice, in such a simple gesture, that he remembered I don't drink alcohol. My mouth instantly fills with saliva.

"I think you're not going to win the bet." I comment, sitting back on the sofa. I separate my food from his, tasting the delicious vegetable sauce that is the most tasty thing in the world. At least that's what my stomach thinks, given how hungry I am.

"I'm almost done." He brags, still tattooing himself. He passes a paper to remove the excess ink from his skin and raises an eyebrow confidently. "I can't wait to see you touching yourself."

"That's not going to happen." I guarantee with a certainty I don't have, blushing and taking a sip of the soda. It's refreshing, going cold down through my throat.

"Let's see if it won't. Do you really think I'm going to miss the chance to watch you masturbating?"

"Jungkook..." I mumble, covering my face. "Don't you have any shame? Stop saying those things."

"Don't worry, Y/N." He smiles, confident in his victory. "You still have a reasonable amount of time to get used to the idea."

"Focus, Kook." I change the subject; my heart races just imagining myself in that situation. He falls silent and bites his lower lip, looking at me from head to toe with such hunger that makes me nervous and excited. I swallow my food as he returns to tattooing, wondering if he will really finish the drawing in time.

And he does. Of course, he does. In the end, after one hour and forty-five minutes, Jungkook has a new complete drawing on his right arm, along with other tattoos that adorn his body. I finished my food just in time to see him ending everything with mastery and calm, as if he wasn't worried about our bet. His hungry eyes find mine, and I know exactly what he wants. I swallow hard, squeezing my thighs together.

"I think I deserve my prize since I won the bet."

"Y-yes." I respond, trembling. My heart beats loudly in my chest, and I have to breathe deeply to finally realize that I don't feel fear, not even a hint of hesitation. All I feel is lust and desire. A longing to have him closer, to touch him in his rawest form. I sigh, watching him stand up and walk calmly towards me, like a predator; a lion eyeing its prey. I shrink back on the couch, small, now that he is standing. His knee sneaks between my legs, and separates my thighs before he squats down, and brings his face closer to mine.

"I don't want you to touch yourself here." He whispers, like a secret. His dilated pupils when he gazes at my mouth. "In my apartment. In my bed. I want you there."

Ask for a TAGLIST in the comments.

@ane102 @joonwater @ttipa

[soothinglee]

now it’s different; i am the one inlove...

jeongin x reader | 3.3k✔︎ | mainly his point of view.

my notes⎯ whew. this is the longest fic i've ever posted and i can't lie and say it wasn't a pain. originally i got this idea from listening to "morning dew" like 100 times and thought it would be perfect to write something for i.n.

warnings⎯ somewhat angsty, poor writing, some cursing, doubts, and humorous dialogue (so sorry if you dont find me funny).

genre⎯ eventual friends to lover, angst.

songs⎯ morning dew; xavier wulf | a new kind of love; frou frou

⎯catalog for skz✰ | requests r open

12.03.23 | 4:04 p.m;

it had been ten minutes since you left jeongins’ side to aid seungmin in teasing changbin. the frigid weather turning your breaths to smoky clouds as you laugh at one another.

jeongin rests in his spot on the park bench, if you ask, he’ll simply say he cannot join in on the fun due to the stiffness in his joints, and not the fact that an unwavering feeling of jealousy is creeping through his bones like wildfire.

he can’t help but narrow his eyes at the skinship you give felix, reaching up to brush the snowflakes out of his bangs, threading your fingers in his when you spot a squirrel resting in a tree; dragging him towards the spot before the rodent runs off.

jeongin hates physical touch with a burning passion. there would never not be a time where he didn’t push one of his hyungs off of him. he didn’t like when bangchan would suprise back hug him, or when hyunjin would randomly sit in his lap and pester him.

yet when he looks at the way you interact with the other members, he cant help but wonder what it would feel like with his hands in yours. running around the white colored park, throwing snow at eachothers faces, trying not to slip on the ice while playing tag with everyone else.

you weren't shy to affection, jeongin knew that for a fact. so there wasn't any real reason for him to be scared to go up to you and initiate a hug or a hand hold. but the overwhelming feeling he's been trying to hide for the last two years is holding him back.

yang jeongin has the biggest crush on you. he just wont admit it.

all the other members can see it clear as day, they don't hesitate to tease him about it when you aren't around; sometimes they do it infront of you but they are somewhat discreet about it.

"you're staring again." a muffle voice comments beside him. jeongin flinches at the sudden sound, he had been sitting by himself silently for a little longer than he had expected. "keep it up and she'll think you're a creep."

jeongin raises up his fist towards hyunjins face to which the man backs away quickly, "shut it." he threatens, he turns his attention back towards you, watching you get a piggyback ride through the snow by bangchan. he holds back a scoff.

hyunjin shrugs, readjusting his scarf around his face. the tip of his nose peeks through the fabric, it's color matches his ears; dusted a cherry red, "i'm not lying. even just watching you watch her is making me uncomfortable," he shivers to further his point, jeongin lightly shoves him. "i don't know why you wont just tell her."

jeongin feels his blood run cold contrast to the heat in his cheeks. he gives a quick glance towards hyunjin who watches him expectantly. "i don't know what you're talking about." he mumbles, adjusting his body on the wooden bench. he's been sitting for so long that his butt is growing numb.

"i.n-ah!"

"what?" he says, "i don't have any feelings for her, i'm only just looking. it's not illegal or did the laws suddenly change?"

jeongin swivels his head exasperatedly to look at hyunjin only to find him staring back with a wide grin. jeongin raises an eyebrow.

after a moment of staring, hyunjin lightly murmurs, "i never said anything about having a crush on her." his grin widens.

in that moment panic flushes through jeongins body and he's quick to clamp a hand over hyunjins mouth. "shut up. shut up dude."

"YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON Y/N." hyunjins voice comes out muffled underneath jeongins glove but he can still hear it very clearly. he just hopes no one else (more specifically you) hears it aswell.

"you liar, i do not! hyung, please stop screaming, i swear-!"

"you guys alright?" a third voice pipes up. both of them turn and see you standing a couple inches away, bare hands shoved in pockets looking like a swaddled marshmallow. you were covered head to toe in snow, proof of the snowball fight you had with felix lingered on your clothing. the apples of your cheeks moved with every sniff you took and jeongin couldn't help but mentally compare you to a bunny.

he immediately released hyunjin, who stayed in his backed up postion grinning at him. "yeah." he cringes at the way his voice cracked out of nerves, or the way his palms started to sweat despite the cold.

"are you sure?" you question, looking at hyunjin then back at him, "i thought i heard a scream."

"no-"

"-you did." hyunjin interjects, slapping a hand on jeongins back. his body jostles forward at the contact. "but it was nothing, right i.n? just some light teasing."

jeongin grunts through his teeth, "yeah. harmless."

you nod, unsure that it's the whole truth, "okay..." you point behind you, gesturing over towards the disfigured snow man whose bottom half lay smaller than its top, it's eyes on opposite sides of its face. "well if you're sure...i'll just go back."

before you can fully turn around, two heavy hands place itself on your shoulders to halt your movements, "no, you should stay and take a break. you've been moving around a lot. i'll finish your snowman with changbin."

you look at hyunjin, eyebrows scrunched together, "are you sure? you don't need to do that, we're almost finished anyway-."

hyunjin looks towards the figure and back towards you, "-no the hell you aren't. don't worry," he reassures, taking a deep breath. you can almost see the captains hat form on his head. "leave it to the artist."

he gives you a light push towards the empty spot next to jeongin, his butt print out lined in the snow on the seat. he turns around and calls out to changbin, "yah! it looks like shit! let me take over!"

"eh? you don't know jack about making a snowman!"

"i know more than you do, genius!" his voice fades away as his stumbles down the hill and towards a grumpy changbin.

you can't help but let out a giggle at the twos bickering. "something is wrong with them."

jeongin tries to nod in agreement but finds himself frozen.

at the lack of a response you turn towards him and see him tense in his spot, "are you okay?" concern drips from your voice as you lean towards him.

he hums quietly, giving you a brief glance and then returning his attention to hyunjin kicking over the snowman. "'m good."

you only nod and face forward.

a couple minutes go by as nothing else is exchanged. your hands begin to freeze due to the lack of heat to your fingers. you pull them out to send a few frosty puffs of air to at least try to heat them up but it doesn't work; you can practically see the icicles grow from your nails.

"it's so cold." you comment, rubbing your hands together.

jeongin perks up at your voice instantly, looking over at the way your shoulders shiver and the weak attempt at warming yourself up. before he even realizes it, he's pulling off his own mittens. "where are your gloves?" he questions, no hints of mockery in his croaky voice.

"gave them to han." you comment, smiling softly, "lee know took his when they were fighting and he wouldn't stop whining about how he was going to have to get his fingers amputated, so i gave him mines."

jeongin can't help the smile making its way to his face at your selflessness. you were always like that, worrying about others before yourself. it was admirable but he wishes you didn't do it as much.

"what about your hands?" he questions, holding out his own pair to you. you kindly reject his offer, pushing away his hands as he tries to force them onto yours.

"what about them?" you retort, "i was keeping them busy, with all the movement it gave me enough warmth."

he can't help but roll his eyes. he gives one last attempt at taking your hands and lets out a little cheer when you relent and give them up. jeongin feels his eyes widen as he looks at the purple color nipping at your fingers, sure you'll get frostbite later. he quickly slides on the wool gloves (much faster than he would've liked- it would've been nice to hold your hands a little longer) and watches satisfied when you lean back on the bench with a relaxed sigh.

with your eyes closed, basking in the new warmth, the feeling of the snowflakes hit the bridge of your nose tickles as you try to brush them off. you can't help the childish giggles that escape you as you scrunch your nose in retaliation.

and jeongin can't help but watch.

all he wanted to do was deny, deny, deny his feelings for you.

he didn't want to complicate the relationship you had built up since you joined the group. he was the first person you talked to, he saw how anxious you were and did everything he could to make you feel comfortable, despite the fact that he was relatively new too and couldn't do much.

sure you were close with all the other members, but you and jeongin had a connection. something deep down that made your tummy hum and your head feel cloudy. every time he was near you he felt- cheesy enough- complete.

jeongin doesn't like you like that.

he couldn't.

"just friends." he thinks, watching as you turn to him with a smile that makes his heart hurt. "just friends."

12.05.23 | 8:23 p.m;

it had been a couple days since you all went to the park and you can already feel the sickness creeping up your throat.

most of the tea in the house was gone due to the other 8 contracting colds left and right. so when you go into the cabinet to make you another fix it wasn’t surprise to see that the options were limited.

what was surprising was that your chamomile tea, which you bought for yourself only (and jeongin) was sat empty on the shelf.

“son of a-.” you start, turning back towards the rooms lined the hallway, “which one of you bitches drank my tea?”

“me, sorry,” a voice echoes down the hall, “i ran out of mine and yours was the only one that looked good.”

jisung.

“i lend you my gloves and this is how you repay me?” you shout back, opting for some black tea instead, turning on the stove. “just for that you have to do my chores for the next week!”

it’s silent for a concerning second, and then a loud, throaty cough, “girl, fuck you!”

before you could spit out a long winded response, full of curse words you didn’t even know could be strung together, a gentle hand was placed on your back.

“you need to relax, you’ll raise your blood pressure, grandma.”

you turn around and see jeongin standing there with a mask around his face. he’s clad in a matching tracksuit, it was a size too big so it hung off his shoulders, allowing you to see the tank strap he had on underneath.

good lord.

“i’m legit only a couple months older than you.” you retort, pointing a wooden spoon at his face, “not too much on me.”

he laughs and raises his hands in defense, “i apologize.” he does you a favor and starts to put water in the kettle, “if it’s really that serious, i could just go out and get more for you. you don’t have to kill han over it.”

you watch as he places the kettle on the stove and ignites the burner, “i would be doing lee know a favor.”

he laughs again and allows you to take over. “plus you’re sick too.” you add, watching steam slowly blow out of the hole, “i don’t want you to go out and take care of me when you’re in the same state. that ain’t right.”

jeongin says nothing for a moment, trying to find the right words to say. he doesn’t want to lay out all his cards on the table, his confession riddle with coughs and pit stops to wipe his nose. but he wants to say that he doesn’t care that’s he’s sick. that he’ll go back to a few days ago and give you the coat off his back if you asked.

to be honest, just like the gloves, you wouldn’t have to.

he’ll willingly give you anything. even the world if you truly wanted it.

ugh, cheesy.

he pulls out his phone and leans against the counter next to you, "if you wont let me get it, i'll just doordash it."

you perk up, "you can doordash tea?"

jeongin nods and grins, facing the app towards you were the jewel-osco section is pulled up, "uh-yeah? you didn't know that?"

you scoff, "no? i'm not a online food delivery freak like the rest of you."

"you say that until you're asking me to order you some take out at like one in the morning."

you roll your eyes and push him out the way jokingly. the kettle begin to whistle like felix trying to hit a high note and you pour the hot water into the mug. "watch it." you pull down another cup from the cabinet, "and please don't spend your money on me. save it for something better."

jeongin raises an eyebrow, "like what? more clothes?" he jokes, clicking place order. "it's fine. i like buying things for you. even if its something small." small was definitely not the right word after he just spent 10 dollars on a tiny box of packets.

you can't help the heat that rises to your cheeks and turn your back to him, finding sudden interest in the tea in front of you. "i'll pay you back later."

"no need." he says, voice coming out softer than he intended, "like i said, i like buying stuff for you." he watches as your hands pause putting the sachets in the mugs and takes over, "i got it."

you have to force the thank you out of your throat as you stare up at him. maybe its because you're sick, but the lightheaded feeling becomes intense and you have to grip the sides of the counter to stabilize yourself. you watch as his hands move with ease, adding the sugar, then the honey to each respective mug.

he says nothing more, but he doesn't need to really say anything. the intense look on his face voices his thoughts a lot more than he wanted to let on, just like a few days ago. something was on his mind, he just wasn't saying what.

"are you okay?" you ask gently, laying a hesitant hand on his mid-back. you can feel him tense underneath your touch for a spilt second and then his body relaxes. he looks towards you quickly, giving a stiff smile. he pushes the finished tea towards you, your hands incase the hot cup before the liquid can spill over.

"mhm." his fingers dance over the rim of his drink, "why wouldn't i be?"

"i dunno." you reply, "you just look...overwhelmed."

"well, i am sick." he smirks, pulling down his mask to his chin, "everything is a little overwhelmed right now."

you shove him lightly, careful of the cup in his hands, "you know that's not what i mean!" he laughs, "but...you do know you can talk to me right? like, you know i wont judge, right?"

he knows that, in a million years, that you were never critical to his feelings. for as long as he could remember the two of you were going to each other for problems that you couldn't solve alone. but this was a different feeling. and if he were to tell you, he could be ruining a relationship that took a long time to build up. why ruin that rapport for something like a silly crush?

but he couldn't help but wonder if you felt the same? there had been many times where some of the other boys said that you felt the same, even though it wasn't there business to get involved (they do not care). but jeongin knew how they could be. spreading misinterpreted lies to egg on something that most likely isn't true in the first place. they had a tendency to mix up words so why would now be any different?

he's spent all of this time convincing himself that what he felt for you wasn't crush like behaviors. just a good friend looking out for another.

but friends dont get jealous when the other holds another's hand. friends dont get jealous when the other gives another more attention. friends dont have the urge to take them on dates, or have their contact be more than platonic, or to kiss the other.

maybe hyunjin has a point, maybe he does like you.

jeongin feels that if his heart continues on like this, it could stop at any moment. "death by seemingly unrequited love." would look hella embarrassing on his tombstone.

out of all the situation he has been alone with you, why did his heart and mind choose now to tell you? maybe it's the sickness making him vulnerable but he feels a rush of confidence surge through his veins.

"actually," he starts, a nervous shake rattles his vocal cords. he refuses to make eye contact with you, finding interest in his scorching hot cup, "there is something i need to tell you."

you posture immediately straightens and you place down your mug, giving him your undivided attention. usually he loves it, now its burdensome, "oh? what is it?"

the tea shakes under his hold and he mentally curses it for exposing his fear. he wants to do it so bad, it'll be okay, he tries to convince himself. just let it out.

"i've been trying to convince myself for a while that what i feel isn't true but i think i should tell you now."

you nod, urging him to go on.

he takes a deep breath, he isn't trying to stall but the way his insides buckle is making it hard to find the words.

he started it, now he just has to finish.

"y/n, I...," he pauses, "y/n I lik-" before he can get it out there's a big crash coming from down the hall. heavy footsteps stop at the kitchens entrance and lee know stands there covered in bubbles.

"what the hell happened?" you comment, rushing over to him while holding back a laugh. he looks like the pillsbury dough boy standing there eagle spread.

lee know coughs and you swear you see several suds fly from his mouth. "seungmin. i'll kill him, i swear i will."

you let out a laugh and brush the soap from his shoulders. it takes you a second to remember but when you do you turn back around to look at jeongin, "i'm so sorry what were you saying?" you start to say only to find the tea he was drinking abandoned on the counter.

"jeongin?"

jeongin barely hears you call out his name as he rushes down the hall and towards his room. he can't help the tears that brim in his eyes and he starts to feel pathetic wiping them away.

what the hell was he thinking? admitting he liked you was hard enough on himself, so why did he think admitting it to you was a good idea?

as he sits on his bed, he can't help but feel a piece of him gone. you most likely didn't know where he was getting at, you didn't know that he was confessing to you in that moment. but the embarrassment of him understanding his words were worse. there was no way he could face you after that. for his own dignity.

as he cries he can't help but think;

it's always different, i am the one in love.

part 2?

[shradsmanifestt]

hi, im sorry for bothering u right now. ive been asking around for advice everywhere because i really need all the help i could use right now. my anxiety is flaring up like crazy because my results come out tomorrow and im so scared because if i mess this up then my future is ruined. my mental health has been horrible and that has severely affected my grades but in most asian countries they dgaf about that and basically think it's nonexistant for minors so ofc i'm still undiagnosed, and if i were to apply to a uni i wouldnt get any good chances anywhere. if i could just get 3 Bs in my AS levels it would be okay or else i'd have to retake it and it's super costly here.. i don't wanna put my family through that because they'll talk me down, degrade me, destroy my self esteem which i've managed to build back a little. they were like this since when i was the topper and thats what made me burnout. undiagnosed adhd, trauma, depression also contributed to it

im applying the law, but instead of the feeling of success that everyone else gets i feel panicked. the 'feeling' people usually get when they're in the wish fulfilled state, the feeling of accepting it and it being real—im not getting that. i dont see a clear picture when i visualize. every time i try to, i end up breaking down and feeling like a failure... but I'm still trying to go on because why is it that the people who hurt me and practically ruined my life get to live successfully, while i suffer? thats not fair... i promised myself that if i could just get 3 Bs, ill turn my life around and work really hard... but is it over for me? i want to win, im trying to, but im scared

im trying my best to visualize myself getting 3 Bs, reenacting my friends faces when i get the results, praying to God and thanking Him for blessing me and continuing to bless me, but there is this fear still lingering at the back of my mind... i feel like I'm not doing it right. i have like one day left and I'm so nervous. im going over posts, tweets, and every time I feel a little better, it all comes crashing down because of doubts. theres only one thing one my mind right now: 'how am I gonna turn it around in one day?' i know that the 3D does not matter and that everything is done in imagination, but here i feel like its not done in imagination either

right now nothings clicking in my head, whatever i read is getting scrambled in my mind, i feel so lost and empty. could u please tell me what to do in this specific situation? u can be as harsh as you want if that's what's needed to get the point across. im really sorry for the bother and id be really grateful if u could please help out, ive never been this desperate before... my life cant be over before it even started

Hey love,

I get you, I really do but trust me when I say this.

THIS SHIT IS REAL AF. Manifestation is real af. It's as real as the fact that you are a human being. All you have to do is trust yourself that it is already done. If good results is what you want then that is exactly what you'll get. You need to choose to stop having doubts because it is already done. That is the simplest answer I can give you. Persist on what you want.

I am glad to tell you this but I just got test results for a major exam held in my uni today and I got into the 95th percentile just by saying to myself that my super power is aptitude tests and that I already scored great. In my friends group only 3 of us were eligible and I have 70+ more marks then them as well. If I can do it, you can do it. You need to stop doubting yourself. Atleast stop doubting manifestation. Cause at this point you're only gonna manifest your doubts.

I'll give you a scenario - If you're worried about getting bad grades, Trust me when I say this you're gonna manifest exactly that coz you will manifest exactly what you assume. You can choose to stop that right here, RN. Choose to accept that you got great marks. I mean don't even like aim for B's go for A's. I don't care even if you left the paper blank coz if you assume you're the topper, that is exactly what's gonna happen.

If you do get bad marks and I'm gonna be harsh here - You're the only reason why! You're gonna manifest exactly what you assume to be true even if it's good or bad. Your sc mind don't differentiate btw what's good for you or what's bad for you. It only knows what you feed it.

You got this, TRUST ME

Love, Shrads.

[herefortheships]

What is your opinion on the Beetlejuice 2 Dream Theory?

My short answer is that it's plausible, but not likely that that's what the writers or Tim intended. That said, every viewer is entitled to their own interpretation. When a piece of media leaves the author's hands, then it doesn't belong exclusively to the author anymore; the story takes on a new form when it falls in the hands of the audience ("the death of the author is the birth of the reader" etc).

I'd have to rewatch the movie with my brain prepared to point out references that may show that everything we're witnessing as the movie plays out is not real.

As for my personal interpretation, I don't think that's the case. There was indeed a dream sequence at the end though; we have to decide, when does the dream start? Was it when Betelgeuse and Lydia were dancing in midair? (Betelgeuse does break the 4th wall to tell the audience "I love a good dream sequence", so that's possible). Or was it later after Lydia says her goodbye to Delia? I've only watched the movie once so far, so my thoughts may change when I rewatch it, but for now, this is where I think the dream starts:

I think the dream started with Lydia quitting her show. She may not have quit it at all, as a matter of fact, but her dream started with this because she's now hoping for a fresh start and quitting her show is part of what she has identified as her ideal life, going forward. She's dreaming about a perfect life, believing herself rid of Betelgeuse and Rory and her past, and starting fresh with Astrid, focused on being her mother and being there for her this time. Astrid and Lydia only have each other now after the loss of Delia and Charles, as far as family goes. All of that from that moment on is the dream. In truth, she isn't rid of Betelgeuse, and she is pretty isolated now. So she is shaken awake by the nightmare (I already made a detailed post about that, so I won't go into detail about the dream and what I think it means here). I think the dream ends when she hears/feels Betelgeuse in bed with her. Betelgeuse isn't gone and he's still very much in love with her, which may not be a very comforting thought to her just yet lol.

Now as I'm writing this, as a matter of fact, her little jumpscare when feeling Betelgeuse in bed with her might have a double meaning. Why was she dreaming about him being in bed with her? To be honest, when I first saw that in the theater I thought the wedding had gone through, since they were sharing a bed now! Lydia may be beginning to realize her feelings about Betel have changed, which understandably scares her right now. Then she wakes up again and he's gone. There is a question here, was he part of the dream or was he truly in bed with Lydia? Maybe he was there after all (which is what I personally believe).

Anyway, I am beginning to ramble, but Tl;Dr: There was a dream, but it starts when Lydia quits her job (or maybe after she quits, when she and Astrid are in vacation together).

Again, if it's the same theory I read (which I totally love and find super intriguing), it does make good points, so in short I would say it's plausible. Today I read a post about how the name "Richard" repeats in the movie in several instances, which may add to the "none of this is real, it's all a dream" theory. But to be honest, for me at least, there is more reason to believe that what we witnessed in the film did happen, and Astrid, Rory, Richard, etc are all real and part of Lydia's life.

That Lydia isn't married to Betel by the end of this film doesn't mean her feelings about him will remain as they are and that she will never accept him or even love him, though. This movie was SO a setup for a third film and I am sure of that. It was left open ended so in the event it didn't land well, the franchise could be set to rest with this sequel which was mostly a passion project for those involved, but now we know the movie was a massive hit, so it's very likely and I have no doubt we will get a final third part. There is a LOT of "the rule of three" around Betelgeuse, starting with the fact that you need to say his name three times to summon him. "Third time's a charm", you know what I mean? So I believe the final movie will see them married (yep, not just together or just friends, but married). Marriage is a very important theme in Beetlejuice, both for the series and the titular character himself, so that wedding will happen and it will go through next time, for better or worse (and I hope for better!) Again, rule of three applies here. I think the story is prime for either a soulmate story, or a tragic "true love will set you free" kind of story in which Lydia has to marry Betelgeuse in order to free his soul so he can move on (it was pointed out to me that this resembles the story of Corpse Bride, which is also a movie directed by Tim Burton). If he goes with the latter, then that doesn't mean Lydia won't love him and will just marry him to free him (as in she’s his true love but she doesn’t love him back romantically); she may still fall in love with him, but will find a way to break his attachment/curse to set his soul free and "let him go" for now (it could go either way tbh 😭), and they can still find each other in the afterlife. And wouldn't that be nice? If the two of them can move on to a better place in the great beyond in the finale? To spend eternity together in peace.

Anyway, rambling again! This is my answer. Sorry for replying a little late (and "yapping" so much lol), but trust me I was thinking about this question all day.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

While I also definitely wouldn't call him one of the worst characters in the show, I think the main upset over his character as a self-insert comes from this exchange:

Ladybug: What's with that trailer too? I am not scared of cats, at all. Animaestro: You haven't even seen the movie and you're already slamming it? Cat Noir: He does have a point, you know.

Which makes it seems like one of those take that, critics moments the show is full of, but it does kind of feel more awkward coming from the self-insert of the creator.

For context, this ask is in reference to my post about the lead writer's self-insert character.

I can see why someone would read it that way and I don't think that they're necessarily wrong to do so. I just don't think that it's the only good explanation.

It's hard to say if this is actually a dig at Miraculous fans or if it's just general commentary on the way that some people react to promotional material. I think we've all seen internet mobs form off of things as uninformative as single promotional picture or a random interview. Sometimes those mobs are totally overreacting and sometimes they raise valid points (see the Sonic design debacle). It totally depends on the situation, but I think it's fair to say that we do see a lot of overreactions, meaning that the point raised in this line has some validity in a general sense.

That being said, the line can certainly read differently depending on what property it's in. If you're watching this having been upset by Miraculous promos that ended up leading to content that was just as bad as you feared, then I get how this would rub you the wrong way. It's hard to be sure if that was intentional or not, but intent doesn't really matter when it comes to your ability to enjoy an episode like this. Once you've made the association, it's near impossible to get rid of it even if you learn that it was 100% unintentional. It's like trying to eat a dish that gave you food poisoning before. This one may be totally safe, but the bad memory is always going to lessen the experience.

For my part, I try to always give people the benefit of the doubt and I generally avoid promotional material because I apparently have a really good memory, meaning that promos often ruin stories for me. This means that I defaulted to reading it as a general commentary and is why this episode really doesn't bother me, but if it bothers you, then I think that's totally fair and make perfect sense.

[ronwestbreeze]

TO YOU , WORLDS AWAY : PART TWO : CHAPTER THIRTEEN

pairing: jake sully x fem!reader

summary: in which tinkers is alive

word count: 2.8k

author's note: i think the psa i posted is enough for an a/n note but if you didn't see it, just remember for future chapters going forward, please don't tell me how to write my story. i write it the way i want it and you can choose to enjoy it or not. and if you don't that's completely fine, just don't be mean about it. okay? okay.

AO3 | prev | next

He thought of the dead, far too often than he’d like to admit.

It wasn’t always a bad thing though, at least that’s what Jake thought. Out of all of them, he had learned the most, he had grown, and he had become the man he was today because of them.

He equally thanked them as much as he grieved them. And to be honest, it took him a long time for him to get to that point. It used to anger him, used to pain him, used to numb him…now Jake only felt, well, he really couldn’t define that yet. It wasn’t denial. It definitely wasn’t acceptance. Just something in the middle, something gray, something nobody could put a name to.

There were different levels to his pain when he remembered those he had lost.

Jake thought of his brother, Tom, from time to time. It was a lot easier than the others as he began to come to terms with his sudden death. They weren’t really close but it was still his brother, you know? Still his other half. And no matter how close or how far apart they were, it still felt as if he had lost another half of himself. A half that he was never going to get back, that would never be replaced because it would always belong to him. And that was okay.

Then there was Tsu’tey. Often he’d find himself doubting his role as the Olo’eyktan and wondered why he was even chosen to lead these people. But the last person he would’ve expected to believe in him, chose him. That had to say something right? That had to be worth something.

He thought of Grace because of course he did. Grace probably had one of the biggest impacts on his life, introduced him to the world of Pandora, gave him a chance even when he definitely didn’t deserve it in the beginning. Perhaps he still didn’t deserve the compassion she gave him. Still to this day, he wasn’t so sure why she believed in him despite everything. It hurt thinking about her, knowing that she would’ve loved to live among the Na’vi like him. Knowing she would’ve loved to meet her daughter…

Jake just hoped that he could do right by her by raising Kiri as his own.

But when thinking of Grace, he couldn’t help but think of…

There was just too much there.

Sometimes he’d feel guilty. Sometimes he wished that Neytiri, whom he had come to love and cherish over the years, wouldn’t see just how much it still hurt him. And he didn’t know why, but this kind of hurt…it was unlike anything he had ever felt before. This kind of hurt scared him, so much that he had to force himself to numb it down in the beginning—still to this day sometimes—because he knew that if he allowed himself to feel this pain, if he allowed himself the luxury of this grief, he’d fall apart.

But Neytiri saw it. She always did.

She knelt down in front of him one day, after finding him sulking silently on a rock one night, and he told her in a broken whisper:

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I…I’m sorry.” It was all he could say, it was all that could escape his lips when he faced her, when he saw the look of knowing in her eyes, when she gave him a sad smile. It was just guilt and grief weighing him down, keeping him heavy and stuck to the ground.

Neytiri smiled sadly, “Oh, Ma’Jake.” She’d place a hand against his cheek and say, “Not even the strongest warrior could ever forget their lost mate.” Jake remembered staring at her in both confusion and shock. “Ma tsmuke, she was your first mate. She was always meant to be a part of this family. It is okay to be sad, Ma’Jake. I am sad sometimes too. I miss her too.”

That day just made him realize it would always still hurt. It didn’t stop it. But at least now he knew why.

It even hurt sometimes when Neytiri would say things like, “I pray to the Mother every day for tsmuke.”

“Why?” He found himself asking. “Wouldn’t it be better to just accept it…that she’s gone?”

Neytiri shook her head, “It is not the same as Tsu’tey or ma sempul. No. I do not believe a warrior like that is just gone. Not like this.”

Jake would frown but not say anything to discourage it. Perhaps it was just her training with the Tsahik, perhaps she was just becoming more spiritual each day she trained with her mother. Either way, he couldn’t find it within himself to tell her that you might’ve been gone.

They never found your human body. Your avatar was under Norm and Dr. Max Patel’s care.

It was just better to assume. Better to let it go now.

You were alive! You were alive! You were alive!

Okay, you supposed that was true. But you also felt like shit so you really didn’t know that being alive was the best revelation right now.

When you opened your eyes, there wasn’t a bright light waiting for you anymore. Only what looked like a wooden ceiling or was it made out of sticks? You really couldn’t tell. What you did know was that everything in your body felt weak and terribly sore. But this time you felt like you were able to move.

Well, at least you thought so at first.

It was a slow process, sitting up and finally taking in your surroundings. From what you could see, it appeared like you were in some sort of hut. The walls were made of wood and the ceiling, as it turned out, was made of long grass. There was a door across from where you had been lying and two smaller holes similar to windows. And judging from the windows, it looked as if it were the late afternoon. At least.

Once you were sitting up, your senses were beginning to kick in. A mask was on your face. Sight was already covered so the smell came next. It was grass and fish that hit your nose first. The grass bit made sense but you had no clue where the fish smell was coming from. Then sound. There were voices, speaking in Na’vi, farther away—no it sounded like it was coming from beneath you. Touch. Something was covering—no, wrapped around your hands and fingers preventing you from fully feeling the rough hammock that you lied on.

Your mind was still foggy, still confused at where exactly you were. Of course, the last thing you remembered was crashing the Samson into the other one that had been shooting at you. You remembered one of its blasts caught your wing and had been one of the reasons why you went down. You remembered fire. You remembered your mask had been broken.

And then it wasn’t. Which, now that you thought about it, didn’t make much sense. Maybe your mask never broke and the smoke from the fire made you delusional.

But then there was another issue and you were quickly reminded of it when you tried moving one of your arms, only to feel a sharp pain at your side.

That crash should’ve killed you. Maybe not on impact but after, there should've been no way you survived.

So how…?

Deciding you weren’t going to get any answers by just sitting, you threw the misshapen blanket—which was made of leaves—off your body and moved to stand.

Only you stopped suddenly when you saw…

Both your legs were wrapped in what looked like leaves and through those leaves, you could see the burns and barely healed scars riddled all over your legs. It was bad enough you could barely keep yourself upright but now you realized you could barely move your injured legs. You had no strength left in you to do so.

It didn’t feel real. For a moment you were sure this was some type of nightmare, that you were still asleep. Or maybe you were dead and left in some horrid hell. But once your bandaged hand grazed one of your legs, barely touched it, everything came crashing down. Everything became real.

You were alive. You were alive. You were alive….

“Dr. L/N?”

The new voice startled you, mostly because you hadn’t heard anyone come into the hut. When you looked up you were met with a Na’vi—no, an avatar—standing before you with a kind yet cautious smile. Cautious as if she were approaching an animal.

You didn’t reply. Mostly because you were waiting for the stranger to introduce herself first since clearly she knew who you were. The avatar cleared her throat, “I’m Dr. Chloe Parker. You may not know me but I was one of the volunteers for Dr. Augustine’s Avatar Program…”

The name wasn’t familiar or maybe it was, you really couldn’t think about it right now. There was too much going on. Your entire body, the recent revelation that you were in fact not dead—hell you didn’t even know where the hell you were.

“I imagine you have a lot of questions—”

“Where am I?”

Dr. Chloe nodded understandingly, “We are currently with the Olangi Clan who have been gracious hosts to us for the past few months.” She chuckled nervously, “But to be completely honest, I think they’re mostly tolerating us at this point…”

The Olangi Clan? The name wasn’t unfamiliar but you also weren’t sure what and where it was. That’s when you remembered what had been going on before your ship had crashed. That’s when you realized why everything felt strange. The reason why you were so tense and on guard…

“What happened with the battle? With the Sky People?” Your stomach twisted in on itself. “Are the Omatikaya clan…are the People…are they alive?”

God, if you were the only survivor, if you happened to be the sole person to survive all of it—

“No, no, no, they’re fine!” Dr. Chloe quickly reassured, kneeling down. When she did, you noticed the pit where a bonfire most likely would be lit at the center of the hut. “Our side one—the Na’vi, I mean! The RDA were exiled and some of us were allowed to stay afterwards and sort of live on Pandora.”

They won? They defeated the Sky People? There was a great relief that fell onto your shoulders, but it didn’t overshadow the tenseness, the exhaustion, and the grief. Just looking down at your injured legs, your entire body, it made it all the more heavier, all the more overwhelming. You were happy, you were angry, you were resentful. And you were sad. You were just really, really, sad.

Dr. Chloe noticed the way you looked down at your bandaged legs and frowned, “…It was an Olangi warrior that found you after your crash. Said Eywa pointed him toward you—or whatever that means…” Your brows furrowed at this but you didn’t stop her from continuing. “He brought you back here, to the plains, and it was mostly the healers keeping you alive for a while. Then my research team arrived and they showed us to you. One of the healers said that you weren’t getting any better and that’s where we stepped in…” She gestured toward you. “At first we tried healing you ourselves but you kept crashing. The wounds were too severe and…well your heart stopped a few times…”

Unshed tears clouded your eyes. Even if they fell you couldn’t wipe them away. You should’ve been grateful, thankful that you were alive now. That you were lucky to have even survived this war.

You were alive. You were alive. You were alive.

Dr. Chloe continued, “We realized at some point that we didn’t have the equipment to manage it…so we put you in cryosleep.”

You closed your eyes. The hut was quiet. You felt Dr. Chloe watch you, feeling her hesitation to keep going.

“How long?”

“Pardon?” She cleared her throat.

You looked up at her, “How long was I in cryosleep?”

Her hesitation already gave you some idea of an answer.

“Five years.”

It was quiet again. You couldn’t say anything. Nothing could have prepared you for this. You had been in cryosleep before and that was when you arrived at Pandora for the first time. Since then, you never thought you’d be placed back under in any circumstance. 

You never thought you’d miss five years of your life just to be half alive.

Five years. Five years just like that. Gone. Suddenly, it didn’t matter how much you contributed to the battle, the relief in knowing your side had won, that Grace’s death wasn’t in vain. None of that mattered when you had spent five years of your life asleep. Missing everything.

Your mind wandered and thought of Jake.

“Dr. L/N?” Dr. Chloe spoke again after a while. “I don’t know if you’ve realized but this is pretty groundbreaking stuff. We were able to save you and keep you alive with our newer machines—think of ECMO machines but better! We’re literally keeping you alive right now because of it.” As she said that, you noticed the tubes attached to your arms and the machines next to your hammock. “You’re a scientist, right? Think of the amazing breakthroughs we could have! It could give us more time, more time to heal patients before their body takes over and kills them! Like for you, for example. Your body could have been unsalvageable if not for our life support machines. Without them…well you could be dead, but that’s why we’re working with the Na’vi to heal you more.”

You didn’t know why, but her growing grin was pissing you off. And it certainly didn’t help keep the tears at bay.

“What’re you thinking, Doc?”

You didn’t even hesitate with your words. “I’m an engineer. Not a scientist.” Your gaze then fell toward the ground. “And I’m thinking you should’ve let me die.”

Again, the hut went silent. Your eyes remained locked on the floor. Dr. Chloe didn’t say anything else and you were glad. All you wanted right now was to be alone. Just alone. Except she wasn’t leaving.

Before you could snap at her, shout at her to leave, someone else entered the room. Instead of another avatar, it was a Na’vi woman. And by the looks of her clothes and accessories, she looked like a healer.

“What are you doing in here?!” The woman snapped in Na’vi. Dr. Chloe scurried to her feet. And you realized, tiredly that you were the smallest person in the room next to the two. “She is supposed to be resting! You should not be here!”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” Dr. Chloe backed away so the Na’vi woman could walk toward you with a wooden bowl in her hands. The doctor’s Na’vi sounded rough but well enough for you to understand her. Dr. Chloe nodded to you before finally leaving the hut. You barely acknowledged her though as the Na’vi woman began checking the bandages around your arms and fingers.

You realized then you were still in a hospital gown. She poked your arm with a needle and you flinched.

“Don’t move.” The healer snapped. You mumbled out an apology. “Your body is weak, you shouldn’t move too much.”

Quietly, you watched her observe your bandages and injuries. Some of them you caught a glance of the worser burns and it made your stomach twist violently. It made you realize how badly wounded you had been, how hard both the humans and the Na’vi seemed to work on keeping your body healing despite the severe ones. Really, you weren’t sure if it was worth the hassle.

While trying not to flinch at another needle poke, you ask the woman quietly, “What’s your name?”

“Ìtxata.” The healer looked at you curiously before focusing back on your left leg.

You winced when you tried scooting closer off the hammock, “When will my body…when will it not be so weak?”

Ìtxata didn’t respond right away. It wasn’t out of hesitation but mostly out of thought as you saw the crease appear between her brows. “It is hard to say….” She glared at the machines around you. “But the Sky People think they’re way can prevent death…nothing can prevent death…no matter the machine.” She then placed a gentle hand on your knee while examining it. “Your body is weak. And it will continue to get weaker until you die. This is only slowing the process.”

It was hard at that point. To hold back the tears. But your body eventually became to worn to remain upright and Ìtxata sensed this right away as she guided your body back to lying down in the hammock. The mask didn’t hide the tears or the restrained sobs but thankfully Ìtxata didn’t bring attention to them.

Instead she continued observing your wounds while you cried, and cried, and cried.

You were alive…You were alive…You were alive…

Coming out of her dreams, Kiri felt dried tears on her cheeks…

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