#I don't even care much about the result it just felt good that's more than enough
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reminiscentrainclouds · 1 month ago
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You guys ever feel trapped? Yea I'm well-acquainted with the feeling of being trapped.
#*text#talk about unpleasant#sorry for only posting textposts here lately. I Forgot how I use this blog.#Also I'm gonna use this as an excuse to vent in the tags about something that's been bothering me today.#I hate days where it feels like I can't be the same person for even. idk. an hour?#I was gonna say just a general statement of 'I hate how I can't feel like the same person for more than an hour' but then I realized it onl#particularly bothered me today so maybe it's just a sometimes thing. throws hands up in the air I WOUDLN'T KNOW#It's just...nothing I do throughout the day matches. i keep starting new things only to forget about them (or forget how much I cared#about them) and try something else later. resulting in a long line of unfinished stuff and frustration.#I keep trying to come up with new conclusions/solutions to problems I've run through my head a million times already.#problems I didn't know I had or forgot about pop up etc.#I'll be doing fine and then I'll just feel stranded out of nowhere with no idea why and trying to figure out if this is normal for me.#I've felt stranded all day.#it's just ugh. i'm so confused. it's been a day i guess.#all the words i write feel kinda foreign to me sometimes. short term memory problems I guess. ✌️#but also I feel very very locked in a really limited worldview. or just like. my world feels very small like tunnel vision kind of thing an#for that reason it just feels like it'll go on the same forever and ever and ever. which is a very scary thought.#idk if my logical 'well that obviously isn't the case. things will change eventually' rebuttal is good enough to go against it.#so there you go I wrapped it all back to the point of the post: feeling trapped. yayyy#i don't mean to make myself sound so sad and pitiful. usually i'm doing fine and bad things kinda just don't register in my brain#but there are Secret Evil Feelings inside me that I don't even know about and sometimes I like to poke them with a stick.
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medicinemane · 3 months ago
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At least I could disable the suggestions but just... I'm sick of it, I'm sick of companies trying to think for me
I'd rather be miserable but doing shit my own way than placid and glass eyed and just taking whatever companies tell me to
Like... literally just asking what I get out of writing a post on tumblr... zero suggestions, just letting me say whatever dumb stuff comes to my head
#the problem is that doing things my way is actually working well; it's just really slow and it's coming from a bad starting point#everything that makes me miserable was even more miserable growing up#you maybe see me and think that I'm doing really horribly; and that may be true; but I'm also truthfully at my peak right now#and frankly as much as I worry about it A LOT; I'm kinda still on the rise in a lot of ways#...I just take way too long to do things; I want to be quicker because a lot of this stuff isn't... it's not being slow and steady#it's being depressed and having trouble working on shit#but... when I do stuff my way the end result tends to be strong#I got a house in 2019 for instance... like in that economy; I feel like that counts as a pretty high roll outcome; you know?#the parts of my life I hate are all... it's like Marley in the Christmas Carol; I've got all these chains around me#and... about 80% of those chains are just my mom or my mom's choices... she blows through so much money all the time#it makes me want to die#but all that shit... it's the past haunting me and drowning me#but shit's better than it was and... I have more friends now that I did in the past; I'm closer to making money than I've been in the past#(part of it is that I kinda want to get shit stabilized in the household; be doing stuff like cooking before I try and sell shit)#(also understand that everyone in high school liked me... we just never saw each other outside of school)#(so it was a situation where I had 'friends'; by that standard everyone at school was a friend)#(but I didn't have a single person I was close with and I was totally isolated in a crowd)#(friend is just a word in english that has to cover a really really wide range of relationships)#(but these days I do have actual friends... just a shame none of us live in the same town... or even state; you know?)#(I like all the people I went to high school with; they all cared a lot and were very bad at it)#(couldn't figure out that like... just give me some company; that's a good 80% of what I'm lacking)#(...I think part of it was they were all stoners and I wasn't; so they felt like... eh... like something something)#(and when I say all stoners I mean... I think... easily 80% of the school; probably 90% and maybe higher were all stoners)#(it uh... was not an easy thing for the staff; cause they obviously all knew; but... figuring out how to best handle it)#(like hell; I wouldn't want to deal with that)#(also like 95% were smokers... you have to understand that most of these kids were rich kids)#(off the top of my head I can only think of 2 other kids who were poor... just... uh...)#(if I named the city the school was in; you'd probably be like 'oh... makes sense')#(I liked everyone there; everyone liked me... just... they were very bad at just basic stuff like spending time together)#(eh... you don't need to hear more)
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sitron-artblog · 1 year ago
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The Untamed - Wei Wuxian
16.07.2023
Sketch - graphite on paper
Late last night I felt The Urge, and I sat down and did the base for this even though the light was fading fast. By the time I wrapped it up it was so dark I could barely see what I was drawing, but here's a pic I took with flash, and a selfie for comparison.
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I think there's something quite freeing about drawing in the dark. If you can't see what the fuck you're doing you're definitely not worrying too much about what you're doing, or getting too lost in the little details.
I picked it back up this morning, some before breakfast and some after. I rarely drink anything when I work, I tend to just swallow it down quickly to move the glass out of the way, but today I brought my favourite coffee mug. It was a really peaceful morning, and it set a really good tone for the day<3
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just-thoughts-no-vibes · 27 days ago
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I knew we would eventually reach a point where masses of people would misinterpret Arcane, but I never imagined it would be this bad.
Yes, I absolutely agree that season 2 was rushed, especially Act 3, and it is undeniable that the series would have benefited from at least one more episode if not an entire act. However, the current discourse about the show is so superficial that it's impossible to have a conversation about anything deeper but a mere synopsis of the characters and story.
So many of you expected this series to hold your hand and dumb everything down so you can understand it. But when it wasn't the case, you all started rioting and calling the characters vague, the plot bad, and the ships underdeveloped.
The amount of people who value spoken text more than the actions of the characters is worrying. And more worrying than that is the amount of those who interpret the said actions so superficially. I can't believe it needs to be explained that it wasn't Vi's death that led to the "good" timeline, but the lack of hextech. The result would have been the same if either of them had died. It wasn't about Vi, but about the child that died because of dangerous technology and that therefore that technology must not be used. The mischaracterization of Vi in general is insane. Call me biased and unfair, but the moment I hear you don't like her I will assume you didn't understand the show.
Also, the whole discourse around Caitvi scene in episode 8 is giving brainsmooth. No, Vi didn't choose Cait over Jinx, quite the opposite. No, Cait didn't plan all of it to fuck Vi. No, Vi didn't do it because she felt forced or because she is a horny animal who doesn't care about her sister. No, them fucking in a cell is not about the class difference, but about the fact that Vi felt an insane rush of emotions after realizing that Cait would let go of her revenge and help Jinx escape, all for her. Yes, I do agree that it would be nice if we got a longer conversation between Vi and Caitlyn and it would feel great to hear Cait apologize, but I'll always value actions over words. Her talking to Jinx, recognizing that she is just as bad as her, and choosing to trust Vi that her sister can change, thus letting Jinx escape will always mean more than any verbal apology and I'll die on that hill.
Also, it was Jinx's decision to let go and walk away. It was not about Vi trying to get to Vander, but about Jinx being tired of everything. Even if that fight didn't happen, the result would be the same: Jinx would leave because she knows that Vi couldn't do that. She knew that the two of them couldn't have a normal life together and that Vi would never give up on her. Jinx didn't "die" because Vi pushed her or failed her, but because she loved her too much. Whether you believe that she is dead or that she escaped, it's her decision either way.
Again, I agree that too much happened too quickly, but stop confusing your stupidity and inability to read between the lines with the quality of the series.
Arcane is flawed but still brilliant.
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alexanderwales · 5 months ago
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"I don't think I could have the relationship with you that you have with me," she said. She was very casual about it, and I was immediately on the defensive.
"What do you mean by that?" I asked.
She put the book she'd been reading down. "It's just, the way you've described it, and the vibe that I get, I don't think I could do it how you do it."
"I still don't know what that means," I said.
"You're always doing this like ... micro calculation thing," she said. "You weigh your words. You try to time things. You have never once called me up while I was at work, or asked me for something when it was inconvenient for me, and you check and double check that you're not being a nuisance."
"And ... that's bad?" I asked.
"No, I love that about you," she said. "It's very kind and considerate. I know that if I tell you I'm not in the mood to hang out, you'll apologize and not push it. If you suggest that we get pizza and I say I'd rather have Korean BBQ, you fold instantly and we get Korean BBQ. I like that. I get the things I want. But it seems like an exhausting way to deal with people."
"I want you to be happy," I said with a small voice.
"I am happy," she replied. "You're great. You remember when we first got together I was like 'hey, look, if you want pizza, we can get pizza, it's just not what I'm in the mood for', and you kept insisting that you didn't care, that you would rather have me follow my needs? And I just thought, 'you know, maybe I should just trust that's what they actually feel'. And it is, as far as I can tell. There's not some secret part of you that wants me to break your way."
"You think I'm ... a simpering coward?" I asked. Even as I said it, it felt too accusatory, the wrong thing to say in the situation.
"Whoa, no, not at all," she laughed. "I think you do all that stuff because ... I don't know, you want to? Because otherwise why would you do it? It's how you are with every aspect of your life, you're a tryhard. I mean you said to me that you wanted to reclaim the term. Your relationship with me is that you're a tryhard (affectionate)."
"And you're ... not?" I asked.
"I'm not that way with anyone," she replied. "You know why I hang out with you so much? It's 'cause I like you. Most days, I am very much in the mood for you, and if you ask for a meetup, I'll say yes, and if you don't ask for one, then I'll ask you first. And for you ..."
"What?" I asked.
"It's like ... you're keeping track," she said. "You want to make sure that you're not sending me more messages than I'm sending you. You're balancing social micro stuff that I don't pay attention to. You're consciously monitoring how much each of us has said and making sure it's the right number of words or whatever."
"It's really not about the number of words," I replied. "It's more ... making sure that social and emotional labor is equitable, that there's a good rhythm to the conversation. I don't think you'd get good results by tracking word count."
"But see, I don't do any of that," she said. "I talk because I feel like talking. I listen when you need to vent because I like you and it feels good to give you an outlet. I mean you are undoubtedly putting in a bunch of work, and for me, there's no work. That's all I meant, really."
"You've thought about it," I said.
"Oh, I'm just reading this book, and there are two characters like us in it, and I was like 'yes, exactly', and then 'that would not work for me'." She shrugged.
"And if I stopped 'putting in the work'?" I asked. "Would we still be ... friends?"
"See, I don't know," she said. "Because that's never who you've been. You're asking me if I would still be friends with you if you changed your personality and how we interact with each other. Maybe? Probably? Who knows? Maybe we'd be better friends somehow. Maybe we're just two basically compatible people, and every time you've ever worried about anything it would actually have been completely fine."
"Or maybe it's load-bearing," I said.
"Maybe!" she replied with a smile that slowly faded. "You okay?"
"I'm thinking," I said. I didn't know if I could verbalize what I was thinking in a way that would be palatable.
"Do you not like being this way with me?" she asked. "Because I have never asked you to. I've made my preferences known, but if you've been bending yourself into knots and feeling a burden, then ..."
"No," I said, because I knew it was what she wanted to hear. "No, I like the way things are between us."
"Good," she smiled. "I do too."
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cressidagrey · 1 month ago
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It's a Love Story - Chapter 8
Summary:
Azriel's shadows find their master a wife.
Azriel would just really like his heart not to get broken again.
And Sky...well, she's just really surprised that that far too handsome male is interested in her at all.
Warning:
Rhys Bashing (as usual), I classified this as Azriel x OC, even when it't technically Azriel x Sellyn Drake (but we kinda know nothing about Sellyn Drake other than that she writes books so Sky is kinda an OC), Cassian is kinda a good guy for once, Azriel has a horrible time, as usual... Stuttering, toxic families (For once I do not mean the IC), Self-Esteem Issues, Secret Identity, Body Image Issues, Fat Shaming, People being utterly horrible. Racism against Illyrians/Lesser Faes?
If any of this triggers you or makes you uncomfortable, please take care of your own mental health and don't read it.
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Sky didn’t have much of a temper.
Even if she was frustrated or annoyed, she rarely got angry or lost her patience. 
It wasn't that she didn't have emotions. She did. She felt things deeply, passionately. However, she also believed that there was no point in wasting energy on getting angry. It didn't solve anything. It only made things worse. 
So Sky had learned a very, very long time ago…that there was no need to start screaming, because her stutter didn’t allow her that anyway…and that maybe…maybe it was easier for her to just let go off her anger about being unfairly treated. 
Getting angry wouldn’t help her. 
That day however…it burst out of her. Burst out of her like somebody had lanced an abscess. 
Her family could say whatever they wanted about her. But they were not going to say a single word about Azriel 
It was Winter Solstice.
Azriel and her had spent the last month or so enjoying winter season in Velaris…even once trying to ice skate on their lake, which only ended with him kissing her skinned knees, because she was definitely not a natural at it.
They had bought Winter Solstice gifts, and baked cookies…had decorated their house with pine garlands and velvet ribbons…
She had knitted them socks and they had made rabbit stews out of rabbits Azriel had hunted in the forest behind their house. (It was…she had never really seen him as a warrior, even when he wore these black leathers and the blue stone that glinted off him…but she could see him as a hunter, when he came home with a couple of rabbits, ready for dinner. It had also resulted in a new fur lined blanket for her, all ready on the couch. 
She had never outright asked…but he seemd to like it when she was cuddled beneath it, like it seemed to soothe some kind of instinct for him. Maybe the fact that it was the animal he had hunted?)   
Sky and Azriel had both made the decision to spend the days with their respective families and have their own Solstice celebrations the next day…that would pretty much sonsits out of a lazy day in bed and nothing else. 
It sounded amazing. Just what they wanted. 
And it had made sense to celebrate like that. She hadn’t wanted to be the one to keep him from his family after all, even if the thought of not spending Solstice with her mate had hurt more than she wanted to admit.
Azriel had been up ridiculous easily in the morning for a snowball fight that was apparently tradition…but not before he had spent a good half hour making her scream his name with his mouth between her thighs…
Afterwards, she had gotten dressed and left the shadows to amuse Hector for the day… and Sky had left to help her mother with dinner preparations.
A nice, quiet family dinner. Nothing more and nothing less.
That’s what it was supposed to be. They didn’t even get that far.
It all went to shit before dinner was even in the oven. 
From the moment she entered her parents house it was a barrage of barbed comments. About her appearance, her stutter, her lack of an boyfriend…her lack of a proper job. (Sellyn Drake was hers. Sellyn Drake was nothing they got to gossip about.) 
Sky had bitten her tongue. She had ignored the comments, tried to enjoy herself. But Claire never knew when enough was enough.
Her sister kept at it. Kept needling, jabbing at Sky until the little bubbles of anger popped to the surface and boiled into something…bigger.
“I…I met my m…mate,” Sky finally said flatly, after anther jab at her lack of a boyfriend. 
Take that Claire. Not just a fiance. A mate. 
Finally in just one thing Sky had been faster than her sister. 
A mate. That mystical rare mating bond had been a gift from the other for her and not for Claire. 
It caught Claire off guard. She stopped pacing, and turned to look at her sister, brow raised. The look said ‘Oh is that so?’ as if it was the kind of nonsense she had come to expect from her.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” she scoffed, clearly not believing a word Sky said. 
But Sky wasn’t going to let this go. “His n..name is Azriel,” Sky said with a smile. “We are ver…very hap…happy.” 
They were. They were so happy. So delightfully happy. (So delightfully happy that Sky had been wondering if maybe…maybe the should start trying. High Fae fertility was hit or miss anyway…why shouldn’t they simply start trying and see where it would take them. And if it took two decades, then it took two decades. If it only took a year or three…well, then they were lucky.)  
Claire narrowed her eyes. She was about to say something mean, Sky could see it in the way her lip curled up.
“He…He's a g…good male,” she said firmly, cutting Claire off before she got the chance to spew out anything else.
Claire laughed. It was a harsh, biting sound.
"A good male? Really, Sky?" she sneered. "You actually fell for that line?"
It wasn’t a line. It was the truth. 
Azriel was a good male. Patient and intense and loving. He had never raised a single finger against her.Azriel would never hurt her intentionally. 
 Claire just wanted to belittle Sky in front of their whole family.
"You must be even more naive than you seem if you believe that," she said, almost pityingly. "You really think he wants you? That he actually cares about you? Nobody could want you. I bet he just pities you."
It should have hurt her, she realised. It would have. Even just months ago, it would have hurt her. 
But right now…right now it didn’t really. 
She was supposed to believe that Azriel didn’t want her? The same male that had spent the better part of an hour on his knees in front of her that very morning, eating her out like a starved male? She was supposed that her mate, who’s arousal shot across the bond like an inferno any time she slipped off her clothes, didn’t want her? That the same male that stared at her like she was a goddess, that spent hours worshipping her body with his hands…that she had nearly made come simply by touching his wings a few days ago didn’t want her? 
Still…Claire's words had their effect. She felt a small stab of doubt in her heart, and she hated it. She hated that her sister could still hurt her like this, still make her feel like that insecure little girl who stuttered and couldn't get a single word right.
“He…He l…loves me and I…I love him,” Sky said calmly.
That was clear in every single one of his actions, in every single word. 
“Where did you even meet him?” Sky’s mother demanded. “And what kind of name is Azriel?”
“In…In a bar. Wh…When we went out for Cl..Claire’s Hen Do.  And I im…imagine it’s an Il…illyrian name.”
Everything ground to a halt.
“He’s Illyrian?!” Her mother demanded sharply. “What’s wrong with you, Skylar!”
Sky flinched at her tone. It was harsh, angry. It was the same tone she'd always used when Sky was younger and got anything wrong or stepped out of line.
"Yes, he's Il…Illlyrian," she said, meeting her mother's gaze levelly. "What's…what’s wrong with that?" she asked. 
She knew that her family wasn’t the…most open about Lesser Faes, but…but that hatred in her mother’s voice….she hadn’t expected that. 
“Everything,” Admon gave back with a snort. “You seriously let that barbarian fuck you? I am surprised you actually survived that and he didn’t just rip you apart.”
Every bit of colour leeched out of her face, except her ruddy red cheeks at these crude words. 
This was Admon. Once upon a time, she had wanted to marry him. To have his children. To spent her life with him. 
And…and this was what he told her to her face. 
“I can’t believe that you even let a creature like him touch you,” her mother breathed staring at her with utter disgust.
“He’...He’s not a cre…creature,” Sky bit out. Azriel was her mate. 
“Is it true by the way?” Her brother wondered. “That Illyrian’s have a cat’s prick?”
"Orin!" her mother exclaimed, aghast. "Don't be vulgar! I don't want to know."
Orin shrugged, a smirk dancing across his face. "What? I’m just curious. I am sure Skylar knows. She must please him somehow when she’s still alive to enjoy their…couplings.”
Sky felt ill. She didn't know what to say, what to say in defense of the man she loved. She couldn't get a word out.
“Did you…did you let it touch you?” Her father demanded finally, his voice icy.
It. Not even him. It. Like Azriel was a thing. 
Sky felt her heart drop to the floor, breaking into pieces.
"Yes," she admitted, her voice barely audible.
Her father's face grew stony, and he took a step closer to her.
“How dare you?” he hissed. "How could you let a monster touch you like that?"
"He's not a monster!" Sky protested, her voice rising. "He's…He’s k…kind and gen…gentle, and-"
“And I am sure, he keeps you stuffed with his cat prick to keep you satisfied,” Claire drawled.
And Sky was done.
Somehow that was the last straw. 
Somehow that made something inside her break, irreparable. 
It snipped away every thread that ever kept her close to the family that she had been born into. 
“At least I didn’t need to take my sister’s sl…sloppy s…seconds,” Sky said, her voice flat, meeting her gaze full on.“And yes, Azriel more than keeps me s…satisfied.”
Silence descended over the room, the only sound the soft crackle of the fire in the hearth. Sky felt the tension in the air grow heavier with each passing second.
"You…you didn’t just say that,” Claire said coldly. "You take that back, Sky.
Sky raised her chin defiantly. "No.” she said simply. “I'm…I’m not taking back the truth," she said, her voice ringing with unexpected steel.
"You do not speak to me like that," Claire hissed. "You have no right—"
Something inside Sky snapped. Years of frustration, years of feeling invisible and ignored, years of enduring Claire's taunts and jibes all bubbled to the surface.
"I…I have ev…every right," she shot back, her heart pounding in her chest. “Not so fun when you are on the re…receiving end, is it?”
“Either you end your…dalliance with…that creature, or you are no daughter of mine,” her father snapped.
He talked to her like she was nothing. Like she was worth less than dirt beneath his boots. 
And somehow that made it even easier. 
“You want me to turn away my mate…for what? This?” She asked him, cocking her head to the side. .
"For the sake of our family’s reputation," her father said. "You are an embarrassment to us all by associating with that…lesser fae barbarian.”
Barbarian. Lesser Fae. Thing. Creature. Monster.
All of that said about the male she loved. About her mate. 
“He’s Illyrian,” Sky said, her voice icy. 
“Oh come off it,” “Orin snapped. “He’s lesser fae. The only thing they are good for is being fodder for the armies during war times. Other than that, they are worthless.”
Fodder. 
“We have Lesser Fae ancestry ourself,” Sky responded icily. “Our great grandmother was a River Nymph.”
"That was a long time ago," her father interrupted sharply. "It was one ancestor generations ago. And besides, her blood was not that strong to begin with."
Sky thought back to the eyes that looked back from her mirror each day. Blue and beautiful. The one trace of her that got passed down to her.
"Maybe it was her blood that made you think that opening your legs for that creature was in any way appropriate," her mother hissed. 
And suddenly it was so easy. 
“Azriel is my mate,” she hissed. “I will al…always chose him over you. You can spew what..whatever insult you want about him or his pe…peoople. He’s still a bet…better male than any of you could ever hope to be, has treated me better than any of you. I’ll gladly no longer be your daughter.”
She felt the sting of tears running down her cheeks, but she didn't try to wipe them away. She just stared back at her family, daring them to say more. There was a short moment of silence, the tension thick enough to cut with a knife.
She should have expected it. Her mother had always been quick to slap her if she did anything anything that she didn’t like.
Just this time…her hand didn’t make contact.
Sky stared at the tendril of shadows that jerked her mother’s hand back, having suddenly appeared. 
*You. Will. Not. Lay. A. Finger. On. Her,* the shadows hissed menacingly.
Sky stared at the shadows, her eyes widening in shock. They were angry. No. Furious. Utterly and completely furious. Her mother seemed equally taken aback, her hand still outstretched in the air where the shadows had stopped her.
Orin looked like he was about to piss himself, and her father…her father stared at the shadows, his face ashen.
“Come here,” Sky said quietly.
The shadows left her mother to come swarming to her, brushing over her cheek in greeting before wrapping themselves around her neck in a clearly possessive move.
Sky felt the familiar warmth of the shadows sink into her, a small bit of comfort in this awful situation. She turned to her family, her jaw set.
"I’m…I’m never coming back," she said, her voice quiet but resolute. And with that, she turned and walked away, She had only taken a handful of steps when she stopped and turned back, one last thing needing to be said, before she closed the door on this chapter of her life forever.
"I never want to see any of you again," she said, her voice shaking only slightly. "And when we have children, don’t you dare come and ask to have anything to do with them. You don’t deserve to even breath the same air as my mate."
With that, she turned and walked away, her head held high. 
***
Whatever went on between sky and her family…it wasn’t good. He could feel that in the bond slumbering underneath his breast bone.
He rubbed it absentmindly, staring in the flickering flame of the Birchin.
He had won that Snowball fight. Once more. One more victory to add to it.  Not that he particularly cared right now.
*Is she alright?* he asked the shadows.
The shadows were…quiet. And that spoke volumes. Something wasn't right. Azriel's heart pounded against his chest, his instincts urging him to act. He had to make sure Sky was alright. He couldn't stand to think about her being in any sort of trouble.
*Physicallly unharmed,* the shadows promised. *Her family is horrible,* they told him distastefully. 
Azriel's heart clenched at the shadow’s words. While it was a small relief that Sky wasn't physically hurt…her family being horrible made him want to grimace. 
“Alright, I had it!” Cassian snapped at that moment. “What the fuck is going on with you two?”
Azriel turned to his brother, seeing Cassian watch Rhys and himself with an expression of…something. Exasperation maybe.
"What do you mean?" Azriel asked, his voice even, feigning ignorance. He was really not in the mood to get into that either. But apparently he wasn’t going to get that small bit of mercy. 
"Don’t play dumb with me, brother," Cassian said, rolling his eyes. "You are both moody and more distant than usual. What the heck happened?"
“I don’t know what you are talking about,” Azriel said flatly. Cassian rolled his eyes.
“Rhys?” Cassian demanded with a sigh. 
“You want to explain or shall I?” Rhys addressed him and Azriel just looked at him flatly.
“You gave the orders, High Lord.”
If Azriel had been in a better mood, he would have smirked. But right now, he just wanted this whole conversation to be over so he could check on Sky. The thought of her made his chest ache. He longed to see her, to hold her, to make sure she's alright. But he knew that Cassian and Rhys wouldn’t let him go without an explanation.
“Azriel and I…had a disagreement about Elain.” Azriel just stared at Rhys blankly. Seriously, that was the best Rhys could come up with? That’s what he wanted to go with?!
"A disagreement?" Cassian asked, brows raised. "What kind of disagreement? A 'we came to an agreement' kind of disagreement, or a 'we punched each other in the face' disagreement?"
“A ‘Rhys sticks his nose into things that are none of his business’ disagreement,” Azriel gave back drily.
“Excuse me, you were going to kiss ELain while her mate was under the same roof two years ago. Did you ever even consider the political ramifications of that?” Rhys snapped. “For gods sake, Azriel!”
Azriel's jaw clenched at Rhys's words, his temper flaring even as he tried to maintain a neutral expression. "You think I didn't consider the consequences? Of course, I did," he hissed, his voice dangerously low. "But feelings aren't logical, Rhys. We don't choose who we fall for, and it's not as simple as calculating political ramifications."
“I told Azriel to keep away from Elain. She fell for Lucien. He’s still moping about it and giving me the fault,” Rhys said flatly. “Out of pure interest, how much longer do you want to keep up with that, Az?”
Azriel couldn’t help the laugh that burst out od his mouth at that.
“You didn’t just fucking tell me to keep away from her. You told me and I quote ‘If you need to fuck somebody go to a pleasure hall and pay for it’,” Azriel repeated viciously.
"And I stand by that," Rhys snapped. "The last thing we need is for you to pine over someone who has made it clear where she stands. Elain has her mate, and she doesn't return your feelings. She’s married for gods’ sake!”
“Whoa!” Cassian cut them off. “What the fuck, Rhys?!”
"What?" Rhys demanded, glaring at Cassian.
Cassian gave him an incredulous look. "You told Azriel to go to a pleasure hall? Seriously?"
"I was trying to be helpful," Rhys said, his jaw clenching.
"Helpful?" Cassian asked incrediously. "Helpful would have been to be a little more understanding towards your brother's feelings. He does have them, you know,” Cassian said sarcastically. 
"I know that," Rhys snapped. "But he needs to move on. It's not healthy to keep pining after someone who doesn't return his feelings."
“Where was this opinion for the 500 years of me pining after Mor?” Azriel snapped. 
Rhys's expression darkened. "Don't do that, Azriel. Don't bring Mor into this. She's not relevant to this discussion."
”Not relevant?” Azriel gave back with a laugh. “I think she’s very relevant. You don’t trust me to act like an adult about my feelings. You ordered me to behave like I am some kind of rabid dog. More than once, more than twice. Constantly. Like I would ever do anything to put Mor and Emerie’s relationship into jeopardy. Don’t worry, High Lord. I’ll behave. I’ll leave Mor and Elain alone. .”
Rhys ran a hand through his hair, his frustration clear. "This is not about Mor, Azriel. This is about keeping the peace within our Inner Circle. Elain has her own life and her own happiness to think about. Interfering could only bring pain, not just for you, but for everyone involved. That’s why I ordered you to keep your distance. Not because I don’t trust your feelings or your actions, but because sometimes even the best intentions can have unintended consequences."
Azriel’s eyes darkened, his anger simmering just beneath the surface. "Don't give me any of your high and mighty bullshit, Rhysand. You don’t think I am good enough for Mor, and you certainly don't think I am good enough for Elain. But don’t worry, I'll keep my distance, as ordered. I wouldn't want to risk upsetting your perfect little court or ruining your plans for peace. Just tell me who else is off limits, so I know who else I'm not good enough for. Maybe Gwyn? Because remember, ‘don’t you dare to pressure her’?"
Rhys sighed, his gaze softening slightly. "Azriel, it's not about who you're 'good enough' for and who you aren't. It's about respecting people's choices and boundaries. Elain has made her choice in Lucien, and I just want to protect her and the peace we've worked so hard to maintain. And no, nobody else is off limits. You're free to…'seek your entertainment' as you please."
His entertainment. 
Right. 
Azriel snorted, the sound full of derision. “It warms my heart that you give me that permission,” Azriel said, his voice dripping with disdain.
Rhys rolled his eyes, clearly irritated by Azriel's reaction. "I'm not trying to 'give you permission,' Azriel," he said firmly. "I'm just trying to make sure you understand why I'm asking you to behave. I care about you and our inner circle. You're my brother, but I also care about Elain and her happiness. I don't want to see anyone get hurt."
“Have I done anything, anything at all that put her happiness in jeopardy?” Azriel asked, his voices harsh. “I kept away as you ordered. I fucking saved Lucien’s life, so she could be happy.”
"You haven't done anything wrong," Rhys acknowledged, his tone softening. "You've been a better friend to Elain than anyone could have asked. You saved Luicen because you are a good person, not just for Elain's sake. But I still think it’s best if you keep your distance. Not just for her, but for yourself too. Dwelling on feelings that can’t be returned will only bring you pain."
“For cauldron’s sake, Rhys,” Cassian said with a sigh.
Rhys turned his attention to him, the exasperation clear in his eyes. "What, Cassian?" he asked, his tone weary.
Cassian rubbed a hand over his jaw, shaking his head. "You’re so hell bent on keeping the peace you forget that the people in your court have feelings too," he said. "Azriel isn’t some emotionless soldier doing your bidding. He has feelings and desires, just like everyone else. And sometimes it’s not as simple as just moving on."
"I know that," Rhys said, running a hand through his hair. "But sometimes we have to put our own feelings aside for the greater good. As a High Lord, I have to think about the impact my actions could have on others. I'm not trying to shut down Azriel's feelings. I'm just trying to protect him from potential pain.”
“Yeah you did a shitty job at that,” Cassian said drily. “You could have told Mor hundred of years ago to have a conversation with him. You didn’t. But Azriel is supposed to tread carefully not to make her or Emerie uncomfortable. Azriel is supposed to behave?”
Rhys's eyes flashed in anger. "I know I've made mistakes, Cassian. I should have handled things differently with Mor and Azriel. But I can't change the past. All I can do is try to make the best decisions for everyone involved right now."
“You don’t even fucking realise how much of a self important hypocritical asshole you are, do you?” Azriel asked flatly. “It’s okay for you to pursue an engaged female that’s engaged to another High Lord, damn the consequences. But the rest of us…we are told to behave.”
Rhys bristled at Azriel’s words, his own temper threatening to flare. "That's different, Azriel," he said, his voice sharp. "That’s different and you know it. You would understand if you had a…” he hesitated.
"If I had a what?" Azriel prompted sharply.
Rhys let out a frustrated sigh, his fingers clenching around his mug. "A mate."
“Rhys,” Cassian said carefully.
"What?" Rhys snapped, his temper still simmering just below the surface. “He doesn’t have a mate, he doesn’t fucking understand it.”
Aaaaaand…. Azriel was done.
So fucking done. 
“Where are you going?” Rhys demanded as he stood up.
“Home,” Azriel said flatly. “You have my gifts, hand them out. Wish Feyre a Happy Birthday, will you? I’ll be back to do your bidding in about 3 days, High Lord.” 
“I highly doubt that your mother will enjoy your impromptu appearance at Rosehall,” Rhys said. Azriel’s hand twitched towards Truthteller. “Let’s just…”
“Rhysand!” Cassian snapped.
“What?” Rhys asked. 
“I have talked to my mother once since the Sealing of Velaris was lifted,” Azriel said tightly. “One conversation where she told me that she found a new family and that I should keep away from her. So no, Rhys. I am not going to Rosehall.”
Rhys looked utterly shell-shocked by Azriel’s revelation. "Azriel, I..." he started, but Azriel simply shook his head.
"Don't," he said. "Just don't." He didn’t wnat to talk about it. He never wanted to talk about that. His mother could do whatever she wanted. he would leave her alone, just as requested. But he was not going to talk about it. 
“Then I am coming with you. You are not spending Winter Solstice alone brooding at the House of Wind,” Cassian said quickly, standing. 
“I am not going to the House of Wind either.” Azriel answered flatly. “I am going home to my house and I won’t be alone either.”
"What do you mean you won't be alone?" Rhys asked sharply.
Azriel just snorted, “My mate will be there,” he said simply. “She’s better company than any of you.”
“Your...your mate?” Rhys repeated, his eyes widening.
Cassian gaped at Azriel. "Your mate? Why didn’t you tell us? Who is she?"
“Why should I tell you? ” Azriel gave back his voice icy. “I may trust you with this court, Rhysand, but I do not trust you with anything I love. Not anymore.”
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primofate · 1 year ago
Text
Genshin Angst Headcanons - Why the two of you broke up
Note: Had an unexpected free day! I haven't written in a while, please excuse the mistakes, if any.
Disclaimer at the end of the post
Warning: Some are pretty predictable. Each of them have their own issues, lore wise, so some are lore heavy. You might not agree with some of them, but its how I see it, so to each their own. Let me know what you think! Some are quite angsty. Some scenes it's you breaking up with him and some are vice versa. Didn't feel like writing Razor, Venti and Xingqiu.
Characters: Aether, Albedo, Alhaitham, Ayato, Baizhu, Bennett, Chongyun, Cyno, Dainsleif, Diluc, Gorou, Heizou, Itto, Kaeya, Kaveh, Kazuha, Lyney, Neuvillette, Scaramouche, Tartaglia, Thoma, Tighnari, Xiao, Zhongli, gn!reader
Personal Favourites in this work: Lyney, Itto, Kazuha
Aether
Sister issues. Enough said.
He realized he didn't have enough time to spare romancing with someone.
Somewhere along the way he felt guilt that he was enjoying his time with you while his sister went through some sort of villain origin story that seemingly turned her bad.
Top off all the adventuring, searching, solving problems for other people that he did...Where did that leave you, exactly?
"...I'm sorry, Y/N... I just... I don't think this is the right time for me to be together with you,"
Albedo
Contrary to popular belief it wouldn't be his lack of time or extreme focus on his alchemical experiments that would break the two of you up. He knows how to manage his time.
It was the RESULTS of experiments and his research that would put him away from you.
The possibility that HE or his world, was way too dangerous for you.
How many "Albedos" did Rhinedottir really create? Was there more than three? Perhaps four, five? And what happens when you come face to face with another Albedo?
"I'm afraid...There are far too many dangers surrounding myself... There are answers that I can't find...and perhaps that's the reason why my answer is to part ways with you,"
Alhaitham
Too much of a nonchalant attitude.
He expressed some kind of interest in you...but it's like... once in a blue moon. 95% of the time you're not sure if he's really into you. It almost seems like he's more into that book he reads all the time.
Simply just not good at expressing himself. Like, at all. Hides behind a "whatever works" and "I don't care about what other people think of me" attitude, unfortunately that seems to include you.
Is so straightforward that sometimes it hurts, but he's really just telling the truth through logical analysis.
will act like the breakup didn't hurt nor affect him at all. In turn it hurts you instead.
"I see. So you've had enough of me... And you only spoke up now? Pointing it out earlier could've diverted us from this path...If that's how you feel already I suggest that we stop seeing each other,"
"That's it? You're not even going to try and work it out with me?"
"What's there to work out? You've made yourself clear. You're not satisfied with the way I treat you, and I'm afraid I'm not going to change the way I act just for your pleasure... It'd be more meaningful for you to find someone who fits your criterias,"
Ayato
entering a relationship with a noble was not as easy as one thought.
It's not just about being together forever and feeling lucky because Ayato is rich and your whole life is set, it's also the not fitting in, the etiquette, the whispers from townfolk that you were too ordinary for him, the work that you needed to do if you were to become his wife.
All that was not really a big problem for you, but Ayato seemed not to know of your struggles, he was extremely busy, and when he wasn't, he seemed to think that everything was well and fine, since you were getting all your basic needs met and even more.
"...So I'm sorry, Ayato. This is just... All too much for me. I'm sorry,"
"...I understand. Forgive me, it seems that I've overlooked a lot of things...Perhaps it is as you say, that it'd be better for us to grow apart rather than grow together,"
Baizhu
because he is a ticking time bomb, no matter which way he looked it's not going to end well for both of you.
He either dies early or lives forever. In both scenarios he anticipates that the two of you are just going to be in a world of hurt.
Besides, he didn't mean to get so attached to someone in the first place, he knew his quest for immortality was long and arduous. You didn't deserve to walk that difficult road too.
While breaking up, will conceal the fact that he's only thinking of you and will possibly hurt you in the process.
"I'm sorry, but it's for the best. I ask that you continue going forward without me, there's no space for you in my... ideal future,"
Bennett
We all know it...it's his bad luck. However, it wasn't YOU who had a problem with it, it was HIM.
You understood that his bad luck was just some extended part of him, plus it's not like it was always bad, there were a lot of good times too. Plenty!
But the guilt ate him up whenever the two of you were stuck in a seemingly impossible scenario and predicament, brought on by his luck. He just had enough of it one day.
"I...I can't keep doing this to you every day! It's not fair..."
will be on the brink of tears before he even starts.
"Maybe it's better if you find someone else to adventure with, Y/N, sorry...!"
runs away before you can even get a word in.
Chongyun
Thinks he's not good enough in every aspect. It's really, seriously not about you. He thinks he's lacking in everything. Strength, maturity, experience, confidence.
So badly wants to stay with you but feels like he's not good enough and thinks that you're better off with someone else.
"D-Don't misunderstand... It's not because I don't like you anymore... I just...Please find someone else!"
Cyno
his bad jokes and TCG addiction. just kidding, you're not that shallow.
A lot of people are intimidated by him being the General Mahamatra because he gives importance to justice. While you, who had seen a bit more of him than other people had, it seemed more of an obsession to uphold the Akademiya's law and integrity.
This was not a big problem to you, you liked how he was serious at work.
Until one day when you were accused of plagiarising one of your papers and Cyno was the one sent to give you a first offense warning. The Akademiya knew of your relationship, that's probably why they sent him, to make it harder on the two of you.
Cyno didn't listen to your explanations on how it was an honest mistake, he still gave you the warning that you "deserved"
From then on it had just been different between the two of you, so it was really a mutual breakup. Or so you thought.
"...After that, I just realized that maybe this isn't the right time for us... We're both working for the Akademiya, we both take our jobs seriously...Unfortunately that seems to just be getting in the way of us...I think it's best if we stop seeing each other,"
"...I see." he pauses for a minute, as if tossing your words in his mind. "I...agree. Parting ways would certainly make work easier for both of us...it's the professional thing to do,"
Dainsleif
Has not moved on from his past.
Sure, everyone has their own baggage to carry, their own history to live through...but Dainsleif has heavier things than that. He seemed to wake up every day thinking of Khaenri'ah and the days long past. Was it regret? Nostalgia? Loneliness? You didn't know. You just knew that he wasn't really completely THERE with you in the present. Part of him still lived in the past.
When you explained that you felt like the two of you were not moving forward together and that it seemed like he wanted to go back to the past instead, he got offended.
"...My past is something that I carry forever, you'd claimed that you understood that," he starts.
"I do! But carrying it with you and letting it drag you backwards are two different things!"
He falters for a moment, only to leave you with his last words before turning away from you forever: "You will never understand, the weight that I carry,"
Diluc
is too guarded. You'd been friends for a long, long, long, long time before he decided he could let you in enough and be more intimate with you.
Even then everything was going at a snail's pace, though you were extremely patient with him.
The biggest problem with Diluc was that the two of you would progress one day, take a step forward, and then the next day it was like the two of you took two steps back.
Example: The two of you went out for a simple stargazing excursion late one night, it was nice and he had been incredibly affectionate. The next day he had trouble even meeting your gaze, and disappeared to do his work. It was also a little awkward during dinnertime. This scenario had happened more than once.
Hint: the closer he got to you the more afraid he became, thinking that he would one day lose you too.
"I...I can't. I love you but I...I've waited far too long. I'm sorry. I'm tired of this endless chase for you!"
He couldn't even say a thing. He'd wanted to ask you to stay, to wait for him a little longer, but he already knew how incredibly selfish that would have been. Instead, he grimaced, and looked away from your gaze, trying to find something worthwhile to say. There was only silence for a few moments.
"Goodbye Diluc," that's when you turned away.
Gorou
worships Kokomi too much and your insecurities just kept circling around in your head.
You know its his job. You know he isn't like that but the problem was YOU and not him.
Simply said you let your insecurity eat up the relationship between the two of you.
You couldn't bring yourself to say that you were jealous of the way he admired Kokomi so you broke up with him with another reason in tow.
Unfortunately, you're not a very good liar face to face so you did a butthole move and actually broke up with him through a letter. You just couldn't face him and tell him why.
All you mentioned in the letter was that you needed time to think and be away from him, and told him not to worry because it was your problem, not his.
Poor Gorou reread that letter over and over, trying to understand what went wrong.
Heizou
is just a natural flirt. You're not sure if he's doing it on purpose or not and you're not sure if he's even aware he's like that.
Anyway you'd seen him getting overly friendly (just another word for flirting) with a few other people a couple of times. You didn't let it get to you the first, fourth or even eighth time but you realized that he KNOWS that you're watching him do that.
So you confront him about it, but he claims that it's just his way of gathering information from others. People like to hear good things and some people are more susceptible to flirtatious comments so he resorts to that for his investigation sometimes.
You didn't really completely buy it and even if you did, it's not like this was healthy for your relationship. You just couldn't make yourself comfortable with it.
*You just chalked it up to the two of you being incompatible.
"I'm just not comfortable with that...I don't think I have to say sorry for how I feel but...I'm sorry anyway because I know you're just doing your job... It's probably best if we part ways here..."
"Is there any way to change your mind?" he genuinely asks.
You only give a lopsided smile. "You're a detective, I think you already know the answer to that,"
Yet he didn't stop you from walking away.
Itto
Kept breaking promises because he was too airheaded or too occupied doing something "stupid" with the kids or with his gang.
Pretty soon it just felt like you were an afterthought while everyone else in his life took precedent.
Got a ramen date? Oops, sorry! Got caught up looking for a strong onikabuto in the forest!
Needed his help to move some things? Gah, he was vandalising the bulletin boards, so he's running a bit late!
What's more you didn't actually mind that carefree, airheaded side of him...but it really got to you when he couldn't even seem to make you a priority. Not once.
He only realized that when he came running, late again, and stood face to face with a crying you.
"Hey sorry Y/N, I was just--...Why are you crying?!" is completely dumbfounded and clueless, mostly because when he came late, you had always shrugged it off with a smile on your face, or so he thought. This time you had a completely different reaction.
"I hate you...*hic* I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!"
Shocked beyond belief. It wasn't like you to just blow up like that, but he couldn't do anything except watch you turn and run away from him after that exclamation.
Kaeya
Sometimes you're not sure if he takes you seriously.
Recently, he's not where he says he is, you don't know why he doesn't just tell you where he is.
He said he'd be working late, but then you find out he's at Angel's Share.
He said he'll be at Angel's Share, but then you catch word from Jean that he's out on a late mission.
He said he's escorting a caravan to Mondstadt but he's actually on assignment in Liyue.
It came to the point where you altogether just stopped looking for him cause half of the time you couldn't find him. It's like he's avoiding you or something, which, actually, seems just about right since he's been so busy with "work"
It reached a breaking point when, for a week, you were unable to bring him the lunch you prepared...because he was not where he said he was going to be. It was starting to get annoying.
"I don't understand why you're lying to me! Why do you have to tell me you'll be at Angel's Share this afternoon when you're not? Do you realize you make me walk all the way there only to come all the way back with nothing achieved?"
"I'm sorry snowflake, that wasn't my intention," though he still chuckles despite knowing full well that you were about to turn away.
"You know what, let me know when you're ready to stop making jokes. Until then, don't bother contacting me,"
He just didn't expect you to actually walk away from him.
Kaveh
Entertains everyone and anyone. Naturally kind at heart, will stop for anyone in trouble...even that flirtatious man/woman who is clearly just pining for his attention.
No he doesn't quite realize this.
The same person had asked for his help at least 4 times now and all 4 times he had been happy to offer a helping hand.
The last straw was when he was invited into the stranger's house, they had apparently needed someone to help them move and re-arrange furniture and he did, working till almost dinner time.
You'd caught him right by the person's door, because Kaveh was actually honest and told you he'd be helping them today, but the person was clearly eyeing Kaveh rather flirtatiously.
"Come again next time," you heard the person say rather happily. Kaveh only replies with "If I have nothing else to do, I suppose,"
"Kaveh, they're coming onto you and you keep letting it happen!"
"I'm not certain what you're talking about...They just needed some help around their house, nothing suspicious happened at all. Even if there was, I won't let anything happen between me and a stranger!"
"Then STOP helping them!"
"There isn't anything wrong with lending a hand...It was a quick move of things, that's all,"
"How would YOU feel if I just went into someone's house and kept helping them "move" things?"
"...I would think that's nice of you,"
You actually threw your hands up. "Oh, forget it! You know what, for someone who LOVES helping others, you're not doing such a great job of helping ME," then walked away and never came back. "Good riddance,"
Kazuha
He's a wandering samurai. You knew what you were getting into but you didn't expect dating him to be so hard.
He was gone for weeks on end, and you were not getting on that boat with him. In essence the two of you were just not ready to follow each other to the end's of the Earth, and that was fair. The two of you were young.
Kazuha kind of saw it coming, whenever he visited you, you seemed less spirited and he had an inkling as to why. The time apart was just too much for you.
It was a rather clean break actually. A real mutual breakup that the two of you agreed on.
"...You could say it's just not the right time for us," you even managed to laugh under your breath and he did the same, though it was barely audible.
"...Mm. There are matters that you need to attend to here...and there are things that I need to do out there," he slowly stood up from his sitting position next to you and still gazed at you rather lovingly. "...Perhaps, in another world, you and I are bound together,"
You gazed back forlornly, "...Just not in this one, it looks like,"
Lyney
because he will always choose his siblings over you. Always.
Though that's not a bad thing because you also think that family is important...somewhere along the way you realized that family is the ONLY thing he had and saw.
Example: Lynette and you had gotten ill at the same time one winter morning. Perhaps it was the cold that was passing around Fontaine. Lyney had been so worried about Lynette, that he seemed to have forgotten about you for the next few days. In fact, Lyney didn't even realize that you caught the cold too. You had only heard from Freminet, who you happened to cross paths with, that Lynette was also ill.
You thought that incident was the end of it, but really it seemed that whenever Lyney wanted to hang out with you, Lynette had to be there too. You tried to understand...after all there's still that mystery of disappearing women in Fontaine.
The breakup was induced when Lyney completely forgot about your birthday, because Freminet's was around the same time as yours. You helped Lyney prepare everything for Freminet, and said nothing about your own.
You realized that there was nothing wrong with choosing family over everything else...but the problem here was that Lyney didn't even have space for you in the first place.
So you left without saying anything. You figured he'd get over it quick. You had even gone so far as to move away from the main city of Fontaine and out into another island, because what would you say if he found you? That you were jealous of his siblings? You weren't going to ruin a family like that and it wasn't right to make him choose...so you just left without a word.
Neuvillette
Had a whole brainrot for this man:
Part 1
Part 2
Scaramouche
surprisingly it's not his anger issues.
It's the way he wouldn't acknowledge your relationship. You wonder how you even got into one with him.
There's no public show of affection, but even behind closed doors it rarely happened.
You knew that he was going to be like that, and so you didn't mind it all that much.
It was getting a bit much though when, out in public, he would walk further in front of you and refused to walk next to you. When he pretended like he didn't even know you. When he didn't stop to help you even when another man had shown interest in you, bordering on uncomfortable.
The more time passed the more you simply felt unloved...but for some reason you still blamed yourself.
"...I...don't know. Maybe you find me undesirable, or just...unappealing. Maybe you're embarrassed of me or...or..." maybe you just didn't care in the first place, you thought to yourself.
There was a long silence. Of you turning your gaze away, of him still piercing into yours. And then...
"Tsk...don't waste my time...Leave if you want to leave, door's open,"
Tartaglia
This one is simple. It's his obsession for fighting plus his complete disregard for himself. It's a constant heart attack for you. At some point the anxiety is just too much for you to handle.
Imagine living every day just wondering if he's safe at the same time knowing that he just loves to look for trouble.
The foul legacy that you know of, he uses it with disregard as well, despite knowing that it wasn't good for him.
And there are even days where you know he was heavily wounded but didn't go to you, in an attempt to shield you from worry.
It's a constant battle trying to stay sane and unworried, until one day it all just becomes too much.
"...Nothing I say will change anything, Tartaglia. This is who you are...This is who you need to be..." you whisper while bandaging his knuckles. He lets out a short hum.
It was silent all up until you finished with his hand, you squeeze it gently. "...I love you but...I can't keep doing this to myself, I'm tired...more so than I have ever been before,"
He lets your hand slip away from his knuckles, and that was the last he saw of you.
Thoma
This one is also simple. He was always taking care of others and running errands for others that he sometimes just couldn't catch a break.
Just a classic case of not enough time for you since he had a job to do for the Kamisato Clan.
He knows it, and feels awful about it. So he's the one who makes the move.
"It hurts that I can't give you what you deserve, Y/N. This isn't it... You deserve more than this but I can't give you that and I'm sorry. Please look for the love that you deserve,"
Tighnari
Remembers everything. Can be critical of things you've done, specially if he thinks there's a better way to do it.
Simply said you just feel stupid in front of him sometimes.
He doesn't mean to, but he sometimes forgets to appreciate or give praise to the things that you do well and even if he does, it tends to be short lived compared to his constructive criticisms.
Pretty soon you felt like he only looks at the bad things you do, and never the good. Though he was really only trying to teach and guide you as an equal.
He in fact feels that you are one of the few people who can keep up educational conversations with him.
The problem is he kind of forgets that you're his lover, and that you would enjoy his praise and affection from time to time.
"Do you... Do you ever have anything nice to say other than 'good work' or 'great observation'?" the words were out of your mouth before you could hold yourself back. Sometimes it was tiring to feel like you weren't good enough.
There's a flash of surprise that crosses Tighnari's expression for a split second, before he recovers. "...Had I not been praising your work enough lately? My apologies... It has a lot of merits, I just thought that you wanted my opinion on how to make it better,"
You opened your mouth to say something, but closed it again right after to ponder on his words. Somehow even that had managed to make you feel embarrassed. It was here you knew that the problem also lied within yourself.
"...Sorry, Tighnari...I think I'll need some time alone,"
He obliges quickly and asks. "That's reasonable. When would you like me to come back?"
"...Let me rephrase that... I need some time away. From us."
Xiao
Unfortunately there's a lot of things wrong here... his lack of affection. His aloof personality. His dedication to his yaksha duties. Despite that he does actually try to be gentlemanly or respectful of you.
The worst of it is that he didn't know how to be in a relationship, in other words he just wasn't ready for one, or perhaps he would never be ready for one.
He didn't understand that humans craved companionship and sometimes touch. He didn't understand that meant having to favour you over others, sometimes even putting you first over his yaksha duties.
Worst of it all was when he shut himself off from you, sometimes for days on end, when his karmic debt was too high. He only really did it to protect you, but never realized how isolated that made you feel.
When you confronted him about it, he felt attacked. Hiding away was the only way he knew how to cope...why couldn't you understand that?
"Let me help you, Xiao,"
"I don't need your help!" his tone would make you wince and just like that he disappears into a billow of smoke.
You never returned to Wangshu Inn after that. If he couldn't let you in, there was no use trying to knock on his heart. Xiao being Xiao, never sought you ought again either.
Zhongli
He had experienced so many things and you had listened to many a tales from him.
This is what caused you to realize that you hadn't even experienced life at all, and yet here you were willing to tie yourself down to him.
It just didn't feel like it added up. Here he was with all this knowledge of the world and here you were who had never even stepped outside of Liyue. By no means were you stupid, but you felt that you could be better not only for him, but for yourself if you learned more.
There was just such a huge gap in life experiences, and though you never expected to get to his level (he was a God who had lived for a long time, you would never catch up to him) you at least wanted to see what was out there with your own eyes instead of through his stories.
He understood that wholeheartedly, and had no qualms in letting you go.
"You will always have a place with me, Y/N. No amount of lifetimes will change that,"
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Disclaimer: Relationships will always have some sort of problem along the way, maybe big, maybe small but I just want to reiterate that breaking up is not always the solution. Communicating is very important. So to those of you who like taking fanfiction too seriously, let it be known that this is just a work of fiction. I don't actually suggest breaking up with someone as soon as there is the slight indication of a problem (Just saw someone commenting on a similar themed post for Haikyuu that this wouldn't happen in the real world if both parties were mature... I mean, sure, but, idk, you must be fun in parties... it's called fiction for a reason...)
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pearlzier · 2 months ago
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︵︵ DAY TWO ﹐ OVERSTIMULATION ☆
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ᰍִ ꒰ KINKTOBER. ִ✧ㅤㅤ masterlist
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NOTES .ᐣ why do i do this to myself LMFAOO im far too busy to be doing kinktober but here we are..... ana makes a decision and regrets it immediately after :3 but haii chris is so fine
WARNINGS .ᐣ overstimulation. oral (f!recieving). dom!chris. sub!reader. afab!reader. breast play. use of pet names (baby, honey, sweetheart, babe etc.)
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"TASTE SO GOOD, BABY, FUCK," chris had practically been latched onto your cunt the moment he'd walked in and put his bags down—he'd barely given you time to process the fact he was back as he'd spread your legs wide and settled himself between within record time. god, he'd missed the taste of you, it'd been far too long away from it. sure, he missed the feeling of your cunt taking him so perfectly when he fucked you, or the warmth of your mouth when you suckd him off, but nothing compared to making you feel good like this with his head between your thighs.
his excuse was he'd been away from you with matt and nick for about a week. the two of you had obviously phoned, messaged, that kind of thing, but it wasn't enough. chris didn't go away much, he stayed at home more often than not, and being away from you? it took a lot out of him. so he was more than a little desperate to get his hands on you when he'd finally gotten back to the house. and now he was on you again? impossible to get him off.
"shit, chris," it's hard to talk with the rhythmic bumping of chris' nose against your clit, his tongue gliding through your wet folds and lapping up your juices as much as he possibly could. it's like he doesn't even need to breathe, it's insane. he hadn't gone up for air in.. what, a while? it felt like forever. especially for you, considering you're the one getting all the pleasure from it. judging from how he's humping the bed, however, maybe he's getting off on it too. "oh my god," you're lost for damn words.
"such a pretty pussy, mmh, missed this so bad," you're surprised he can talk as fluently as he is with his face pressed up against your warmth. "got withdrawal, y'know? can actually result in death if i don't eat you out at least once every few days," he was a fiend. absolutely obsessed with the taste of you and making you feel good. the death grip on your thighs tells you absolutely everything, this man is living his best life right there and he isn't moving. certified eater, whatever you wanted to call it, but he's between your thighs and you're just gonna have to suck it up and ride it out. "can you breathe?"
he lifts his head a little, "just fine, ma," before he starts kissing and sucking at your clit, completely flooring any plans you'd had of speaking with just a few suckles of his mouth. chris doesn't care about getting messy, how your juices trickle down his chin and the way his lips get a little puffy from working so hard, he'd do this over and over again just to see you happy. his soft moans send vibrations through you, starting at your clit in his mouth before running up your body in a burst of warmth.
it's when he starts circling your entrance with his fingers that you actually realise how long the two of you are gonna be here. you'd wondered whether this was just gonna be foreplay and he'd ease his cock inside of you soon enough but the introduction of his fingers met he was gonna be entertaining himself with you a lot longer than you'd thought. not that you mind, you're just as here for it as he is. "chris," you let out, a whiny sound, when he finally pushes his fingers into you with a little thrust forward.
he looks up at you, then, his blue eyes dilated to the point of being near black, all the while paying attention to your sensitive bundle of nerves whilst his fingers slowly ease inside of you. "so fuckin' wet, baby. all for me? shit, musta' missed me so much.." he's not even paying attention to how his fingers start to thrust in and out of you, it's all muscle memory by now. he's done this whole thing so many times with you he could do it with his eyes closed, with one hand, whatever you wanted.
"missed you so bad," you whisper, shamelessly sliding your hand upwards on your chest under your shirt to grasp your tit in your hand, rolling your fingers over your nipples as you knead the soft flesh. chris groans at the sight of that, only urging him to keep going. his fingers curl upwards towards that sweet spot inside you, brushing up against it and making the purposeful motion of rubbing against it with every movement. your fingers tighten around your nipples, and you cry out a soft sound, hips instinctively bucking towards his face.
"keep playing with your tits f'me, baby," chris mumbles into your pussy, his lips wet and slick with your arousal as he runs his tongue over you. "that's it.. makin' me jealous, honey, might have t'pay attention t'em in a second." you squeeze your breasts together, thumbs rolling over your hard buds and making your cunt pulse as chris continues eating you out. "m'gonna.." you could feel your orgasm hurtling itself towards you, not sneaking up on you, no, it wanted you to know it was coming. the wet squelch of his fingers pumping in and out of you, curled against your sweet spot, it makes your head spin.
"gonna come all over my face?" chris asks, only lapping at you in sloppier, messy motions. "gonna make a mess for me? go on then, sweetheart, there we go," he growls, and the vibrations manage to send you over the edge, your thighs trembling around his face and squeezing him there so he wouldn't move away. not that he'd dream of it, anyway, but just a precaution. "taste so good, soaking my face," you'd expect chris to move away from your oozing pussy once he'd helped you through your orgasm, but he's not deterred by suffocating in your juices, he only keeps going.
"chris, i—" you go to speak, to tell him you need a moment, but he gives you a tight squeeze of your ass and a few rougher pumps of his fingers to tell you that, well—"m'not finished, baby, so you gotta wait till m'done," he wasn't finished with you, there was no time to lose, he had to pull another orgasm out of you again, and again, and again. he was making up for his time away from you, after all. so, he kept going.
"too much, too.." you gasp, the familiar feeling of an orgasm building up once more. your head's spinning a little, fuzzy from your first climax blending into the upcoming second one. "you can give me another one, right, babe? c'mon, i ain't asking for much, just another one," he wants to feel your cunt twitch in his mouth, your sticky pussy against his face after coming for him a million times over. he's not asking for much, right? "gonna give me another one," he tells you, like he's already decided.
you're whining, bottom lip quivering as he continued his assault on your cunt. "feels too good, i can't.." you don't know whether you could take any more after this, coming a second time seemed like enough. you're subconsciously grinding yourself against his face, which makes chris smile. "sayin' you can't take anymore but you're fuckin' yourself on my face, huh? you lyin' to me?"
"not lying, no, no.. just.." another whine escapes you when he laughs, a mixture of embarrassment and the feel of the vibration causing you to let out that sweet sound. chris was relentless, he wouldn't stop until he had you trembling due to him once again. "s'gonna happen again, m'gonna come, shit, shit, shit—" his fingers curl further, and he starts to lick around your fluttering hole where his fingers are to get you over that edge once more.
"come for me, baby, there we go, wasn't hard, was it? you could take more. can take more," he rambles, moving away from you for a moment to give you some much needed reprieve. his tongue makes gentle circles against your inner thigh now, something to occupy him as your thighs shook and you recovered from your second orgasm within the span of a few minutes. but, he's not satisfied for long. "you ready?"
"ready for what..?" you ask, voice a little breathy and weak from how spent you were. your eyes meet his, hands grasping at your tits still almost in comfort, and chris scoffs quietly at your question as if it was dumb to ask. "you're gonna come on my tongue 'n' fingers again, and then m'gonna fuck you on my cock. so hold on tight, would you?"
yeah, you were gonna be here for a while.
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ִ ֹ ★ @mattybsgroupie, @mattslolita, @stellasturns, @stevelacylovebot, @jetaimevous, @phone4pills, @aesthetixhoe, @venusiers, @chrissdollie, @stvrnmc, @sarosfilms, @beetlejenna, @funkycoloured, @v3nusasagrl, @imwetforyourmom, @deansbite, @beridollie, @pr3ttyf4wn, @sincerebabydoll, @bbittenapples, @cayleeuhithinknot, @j2ss7, @sweetrelieef, @l3sbiancvnt, @fallbhind, @beausling, @eternaldecisions, @httqvi, @gibson-g1rl, @zayluvss, @angelssdreamss, @gxldenlush ִ ꒱
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the-secret-keeper · 3 months ago
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Twisted Wonderland Dorm Leaders ( - Kalim and Vil) X Reader
Not requested, just inspired. I was thinking about the diet that Vil put the characters on at the VDC/SDC, and I was wondering what it would be like if the reader couldn't eat what Vil had directed them to eat, so they go to the other dorm leaders to beg for food. Maybe because of an allergy, maybe because of a sensory issue, or a different health issue, it's not specified.
This could be read as Platonic or Romantic. GN Reader
Malleus' scenario is when you invite him to the VDC/SDC but with a little more added on to fit the scenario.
TWs: Mentions of hunger/starvation, mentions of not eating, and mentions of tampering with food.
Minor angst
You were so hungry. You had already tried hiding food from Vil, and not even anything that was unhealthy, just something that wasn't within his diet regulations. But he had found it, and you had gotten scolded. You wanted to eat with everyone else, but you just couldn't, and it seemed like Vil hadn't noticed. Some of the others had, but for your own sake hadn't questioned it, not wanting to make you talk about it if you were uncomfortable.
You had nowhere else to turn, so you turned to them. As embarrassed as you were, you put your pride to the side in an attempt to get some scraps of food.
Riddle Rosehearts
"I'm sorry, what?" He asked, incredulously. "You want food?"
"Not much! I swear!" You quickly defended. "Even just a small portion, I promise, I'm not trying to eat you out of house and home. I just," You sighed, tired and out of energy, "I can't eat."
"You can't?"
"What Vil is making me try to eat, I can't eat it. And I am starving, Riddle." You begged him. "I will do anything, for just a little bit of food. I'll clean, I'll help cook it, I'll help Ace and Deuce study, I'll do chores for however long you want. Just, please, Riddle."
In an act of desperation, you got down on your knees in front of his desk where he had previously been doing homework. You clasped your hands together, your last shred of dignity flying out the window as tears pricked your eyes.
Here you were, literally begging on your knees in front of your friend for food. You felt guilty, but you also knew that you could trust Riddle. And it's not as if you were just asking for food and leaving, you were offering a trade for the food.
"I am literally begging you. Please, Riddle." He got up and rounded the desk.
"Get up, you don't need to beg." He gently scolded, helping you to your feet. "Come on, let's get you some food from the kitchen. We can't give you enough food for the rest of the week, but we can at least offer you a meal for now, and invite you to dinner at least a few more times this week."
"Thank you! Thank you so much, Riddle. You're a life saver." You beamed, wiping away a few of the tears that had trailed down from your eyes. You would hug him, but he's not really used to physical affection, and didn't want to make him uncomfortable.
"This is just doing the bare minimum. You're my friend, and if the person who is supposed to be taking care of you isn't, then I shall help you in any way you can." He nodded to his own words.
"You really are the best." You smiled at him, and he turned a little red.
"Come on. Let's go talk to Trey about getting you something to eat." He led you out of his office, and towards the kitchen.
Leona Kingscholar
"Shishishi." Ruggie laughed as he left you at Leona's door. "Good luck."
You probably would've gotten better results if you had asked Ruggie out right, and you acknowledge this as you stand in front of Leona's bedroom door. But, you decided to be vague, only stating that you needed a favor from Leona, rather than being up front. But you've made your bed, now you must lie in it. You mustered up the little courage you had, tossing your pride out, and knocked on Leona's door.
There was no response, which wasn't really unusual. You'd gotten closer with Leona lately, but it was still pretty normal for you to find him sleeping at all hours of the day, or for him to doze off while you were with him. You entered anyway, deciding to just rip of the bandage before you lost your nerve.
"Leona." You called once the door was closed behind you. "I need to talk with you."
"Whaddya want herbivore?" Leona asked, his voice heavy with sleep.
"I need a favor."
"Again? After the Octavinelle incident, I thought you'd never want to ask me anything ever again."
"Leona, please." You sighed, walking closer to his bed so he could see you.
"You look like shit." He commented.
"Leona." You scolded lightly, before shaking your head. "Look, it's not like I want to ask you a favor. But you're the only one I can sort of trust in this damn school that won't also get in trouble for helping me."
"Hmm?" He raised an eyebrow. "What kind of favor is this that you're worried your friends will get in trouble for helping you?"
"Vil has us on a really strict diet, and I can't eat any of it. But when I bought my own food and hid it from him, just so that I could eat and not bother him or anyone, he either tampered with it or threw it out. If I try again, I'll get in trouble, as will Ace, Deuce, and Grim if they help me. I would go to Jack, but he's still an underclassmen to Vil, so he might get in trouble too. But you're on the same level as him, so he can't scold you."
"As if he would try. What exactly are you asking of me?"
"Please, Leona, I need some food."
"Ha?"
"I'm not asking for a five course meal, just a little bit of food. Even just a small meal, or a bit of a portion of food from the meals your dorm eats. Please, Leona." He mulled it over for a few moments, the silence hanging heavily in the air.
"On one condition." He smirked, sitting up in his bed, leaning against the headboard.
"What?" You asked, apprehensive of what he may ask you to do. Target practice? Hours and hours of chess? Personal servant for an indefinite amount of time? What?
"Beg me. Beg me properly." You breathed a sigh of relief, happy that was all he wanted. It might be embarrassing, perhaps even a bit degrading, but at this point, you're desperate.
You sunk to your knees, looking Leona in the eyes. His eyes widened momentarily, in shock that you're actually willing to do what he asked. You clasped your hands together in front of you.
"I am begging you Leona. Please, help me." You begged. "I need your help, please."
"Alright, alright." He waved off your begging. "I'll tell Ruggie to make you something. And you can come and go whenever, and take food, just don't take too much."
"Thank you! This means so much, Leona." You thanked, shooting up from your position on the floor in front of him as he got up from his bed.
"Don't mention it." He sighed, walked towards the door. "I'm serious. Don't tell anyone about this." He glared.
"Never." You swore, crossing your heart with your pointer finger. He raised an eyebrow, confused at your action, but rolled his eyes.
"You coming or what?" You scrambled to quickly follow after him out of the room and towards the kitchen.
Azul Ashengrotto
"I'd like to make a deal." You had said to Jade, as he was the first one you saw upon entering the Mostro Lounge. He only smiled, that scary smile he always has on his face, and gestured for you to follow him, which you did.
He led you through the lounge, and to the back. Azul's office door was closed, as it usually was when you came to visit. You had grown quite close after the incident at Scarabia, and visited every now and then. But you hadn't been able to since Vil and the others had moved in.
Jade opened the door after knocking, telling Azul that he had a visitor. Azul looked up to see you, and smiled.
"What brings you here today?" He asked.
"They'd like to make a deal." Jade said cryptically before leaving. Azul looked at you, a little shocked, but it barely showed on his face.
"Is that true?" You nodded. "What can I do for you then?"
"I don't have much to offer in exchange for my request." You warned.
"I am aware. But I'm sure we can come up with something." His customer service persona was shining through, and it was almost impressive. "Now, what can I do for you?" You hesitated. "I have had my fair share of weird requests, rest assured, there's nothing to be embarrassed of." He tried to reassure you.
"Food." You weakly mumbled, almost pained by the request.
"I'm sorry, I fear I may have misheard you." He blinked, looking like a statue for a moment. "Did you say you wanted... food?"
"Yes.." You nodded.
"I apologize, I'm just a little confused. May I ask why you want food? I mean, don't you have food at your dorm? I know the budget is limited, but..." he trailed off.
"Vil, has put the entire team for the VDC/SDC on a very strict diet. And while I get what his intentions are, I can't eat the things he's trying to make me eat. I tried to buy my own food using the money I got from working shifts here, but he either threw it out or tampered with it. I'm sorry to be such an inconvenience, Azul, I'm just... I'm at my limit. I'm starving."
"He tampered with your food? How?"
"He hexed it." You told him. "It was just supposed to be to deter the others from eating it, since technically I don't need to be on the diet, but he did it to my private food stash too, so I fear he may be trying to make it so everyone has to eat the same thing. But like I said, I can't eat it. I can't. So, I'd like to make a deal. In exchange for some food, I'll work for free or something at the Mostro Lounge after the VDC/SDC." You tried to bargain.
"No, no, no, that simply won't do." He shook his head. "You already get an employee discount, but I'll comp your meals until the VDC/SDC is finished. Everyone should be allowed to eat." He told you. "Come in anytime, I'll inform the other employees that you are not to be charged."
"Really?"
"Yes. But, on one condition."
"What's the condition?"
"Come here when you have free time. Your company is nice, and it has been too long since we have spent time together." You smiled at him.
"It's a deal." You agreed. "Thank you, Azul. You're amazing! I mean it! This means everything to me!" You praised.
"Yes, I am. Feel free to spread the word about how generous I am." He laughed lightly. "Go outside and order something, then come back in here. You can do homework and eat as I work on contracts." You nodded, walking out to find Jade to order some food.
Idia Shroud
It was Ortho who had suggested it. He knew you and his brother were close, or at least closer than Idia was to the other students in this school. Ortho was concerned about your health, seeing it slowly decline as you weren't able to eat. He had practically dragged you to his brothers bedroom door out of concern for your health.
"Big Brother!" Ortho called. "Your friend is here, and they need your help." No response. You knocked rather loudly.
"Idia, I need to talk with you, please." You called out. A silence settled, and you were about to give up when the door opened.
"Come in." Idia said, allowing you into his dorm. He gestured for Ortho to come in to, but Ortho flew off before he could ask. "Ortho said you needed help."
"I hate to ask." You sighed.
"Well," he stammered, "you... you don't have to."
"I kinda do though." You acknowledged. "Idia, can I... can I have some food?"
"Food?" You shocked him out of his embarrassed state. "I'm sorry... food? Why do you want food? No, wait, that was a stupid question!" He panicked. "Of course you want food, everybody wants food, it's a necessity of life, even in games you need food," he began to rant, "I meant to ask why you want food from me, or, or, or, why you need to ask me for food?"
"Because," You interrupted his stammering, panicking, fast-speaking state, "because Vil has put everyone on a diet, and he's tampered with any food he's deemed to be outside of the diet. But I can't eat what he's asking me to eat. I just can't, Idia. But when I tried to buy my own food and hide it from him, he tampered with or threw that out too. I am really hungry Idia. And I hate to ask this of you, but can I please have some food?"
"Oh... OH of course. I'll order food for you right away."
"I can't, eat it at my dorm, Idia." You warned. "Vil will have a fit." He pulled up his phone.
"Then I'll just have to order it to be delivered to here, and you can eat it with me. Can't get in trouble with Vil if another dorm leader invited you to eat with them, right?" You blinked, slightly shocked at his cunning behavior.
"But... what if Vil gets angry at you?" You asked.
"That is a scary thought, he's rather.... intimidating." Idia acknowledged. "But, if he can't find me, he can't scold me, and he's never been to Ignihyde." Silence overtook you both for a moment, before you burst out laughing, beaming at Idia.
"Thank you, Idia!" You smiled. He chuckled a little as well.
Malleus Draconia
You didn't have to look long to find your friend Tsunotaro. He never seemed to be too far away when you needed him. Which was nice, in this case. You spotted him not too far away from Ramshackle, and managed to sneak past Vil's room just quiet enough to get out the door, and speed-walk towards your friend.
"Hi Hornton!" You greeted cheerfully, the envelope you'd been hoping to give him tucked safely in your pocket. He turned, and smiled softly at you.
"Greetings, child of man." He greeted, watching as you rushed up to him. "It's been some time. I trust all is well?" You waved your hand in a so-so motion.
"It's been better." You admitted. "But I'm doing ok right now!"
"I'm glad to hear it. It's good to see you in high spirits." He smiled.
"I had a question. Were you the one who sent the holiday greeting card?" You asked.
"Ah... that's right. I did give a card to Lilia to send. I never received a reply though." A bolt of guilt shot through you, even though you had no real way to respond or know if it was him or not. Especially given the fact that you needed to ask a favor of him. "You've surmised correctly. You really have no idea who I am, do you? Heh."
"I'd like to give you something in return for the card."
Maybe after you give him these tickets, you'll be even, and you'll be able to ask this favor without guilt. You are friends, right? He's your friend, so he might be willing to help you. You handed him the envelopes with the tickets in it. He carefully opened it, taking out the tickets to look at them.
"Are these... tickets to the show they're putting on at this year's culture fair?" He asked, almost shocked at the gift. "Are you actually inviting me?" He looked shell-shocked. You nodded enthusiastically, causing him to start laughing. "You truly have no fear at all." He smiled at you. "Very well. I shall accept your gracious invitation. Will you be in it?"
"No, I'm the team manager." You admitted. "But Vil and Kalim will be in it?" He should certainly know them, you thought, as they were dorm leaders.
"Oh, you're the team manager? Pity." He hummed. "But Schoenheit and Asim will be in it? Heh. That should be quite the spectacle. I'll look forward to the festival. Have a good night," He began to bade. You panicked.
"Wait!" You exclaimed, reaching forward and grabbing his arm, causing him to look at you with a little bit of shock. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to yell. And I feel guilty for even having to ask this of you after it took so long for me to respond to your holiday card." You admitted, sighing as you let him go.
"Ask what of me, child of man?"
"I told you that I'm the team manager. Vil had imposed a diet for the entire team, and unfortunately, that includes me. But I can't eat anything that he's making us eat. And I tried," your eyes pricked with tears, desperate for a solution you were hoping Hornton could provide, "I tried to just buy my own food and hide it from him, so I wouldn't bother anyone and I could still eat. But he found it, and he threw out most of it, and hexed what was left. And I'm just..." You tried not to sniffle, as a few tears escaped your eyes out of frustration at your situation and the fact that you're crying in front of your good friend, "I'm desperate at this point, Hornton. I'm starving. So, while I hate to ask this of you, and you absolutely do not have to do this, do you think I could maybe have some food?" You asked, getting quieter and quieter as you continued to speak.
"Schoenheit is not letting you eat?" He asked.
"It's not that he's not letting me eat, but he's not listening when I'm telling him I can't eat what he's trying to get me to eat." You explained.
"He... he hexed your food?" You nodded to his question, hearing thunder rumble from somewhere in the distance, despite the fact that it was winter. "Come, child of man," he held his hand out for you to take, "we shall feast tonight. And if Schoenheit has a problem with it, than he can talk to the dorm leader of Diasomnia about it." You nearly started crying out of relief. Bypassing his hand, you just slammed into him fully, hugging him tightly.
He must be quite good friends with his dorm leader, you found yourself thinking as he led you away from Ramshackle.
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bedoballoons · 11 months ago
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GENSHIN BOYS WITH A FEM!THIN/UNDERWEIGHT READER???? ive always been rlly thin, so it’s not eating disorder related just a scrawny fem!reader
OOOOOO OKIE!! I've always been thicker myself so I hope I wrote this well! Thank you for your request and I hope you enjoy the characters I picked!!
─⊰💕𝔾𝕖𝕟𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕟 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤💕⊰─
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{༻~Scrawny and cute~༺}
CW: Fem! Reader described as being very thin!, fluffy and sweet!
A/n: First time writing Gaming!! EEE so excited!! Hope I did him justice!!
(Includes: Lyney, Gaming, and Venti!)
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𑁍༄Lyney:
You tried to stay perfectly still as Lynette measured you...how had you gotten in this position? You weren't really sure, all you knew was that Lyney was special ordering you a outfit for his next show and he'd asked his sister to measure you, only she seemed a little perplexed with the results. "You're eating right? You make sure to have three meals a day? Maybe even some snacks?"
You raised a eyebrow at her, "Yes of course. Why do you ask?"
She paused for a second, her features not giving any hint to what she was feeling, "Your measurements are just very small, for a second I was worried you might need to eat more."
"Nope, I was actually worried about that at first as well, but I always make food and she eats it. She's just naturally thin, which is exactly why I'm thinking you'll be perfect for the trick I have in mind...if that's alright of course?"
You and Lynette turned your attention to Lyney as he walked up to you, his eyes sparkling with inspiration as you contemplated his request. "Hmm do I get a kiss after the show?"
"As if you wouldn't mon amour~"
𑁍༄Gaming:
"Woah here let me get that for ya!"
"Watch your step, don't want you to fall!"
"Get to safety I'll take care of them!"
You'd heard them a few to many times lately, you knew Gaming was only looking out for you, he was a caring guy and he truly just wanted to make sure you were okay all the time...even if he was being a little to...over protective. Yes you were a bit scrawnier than he was...his claymore probably weighed more then you did, but that didn't mean he had to do everything for you..., "Hey Gaming? You know you don't have to do all that stuff for me right? I can do it just fine I swea-"
"Oh I have no doubts you could, I just figured when I'm with you, you shouldn't have to. Hmm how do I put this...you're one of the most precious things to me, so I want to take care of you." He scratched the back of his neck, a blush creeping onto his cheeks, "Maybe I was over doing it though...sorry. Promise i'll remember that for next time, for now lets enjoy some dim sum!"
𑁍༄Venti:
Venti wrapped his arms around your waist tightly and rested his chin on your shoulder, watching as ran your fingers over the details engraved in his lyre. He'd been teaching you how to play little by little everyday and now you could almost strum a whole song...but it still just didn't sound as good as when he played it, "Venti do you think one day my music will induce feelings like yours does? I want to play you a melody that leaves you feeling calm and happy, just like you do to me."
He smiled softly and kissed your cheek, his embrace growing slightly tighter around your slim waist, "I think one day you will make music that leaves everyone feeling calm and free, you have talent and a beauty even crystal flies would be jealous of."
You felt your cheeks heat up at his words and butterflies fill your stomach...one day. One day you'd play him a tune that explained every feeling just right and then when he held you tightly after, chuckling happily and making a joke about how he hopes he doesn't break you with his hugs...you'd tell him just how much you loved him and it would be the most perfect of days.
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ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ♡‧₊˚~Have a nice day!~*⁠.⁠✧
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nocturniashifter · 5 months ago
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𝓨ou in the eyes of your s/o | pick a pile
Hello, my angels! After a long time without posting any PAP, here I am with one that just came out of the oven. I really hope you like it and that it resonates with you ;) ♡
┈─★ Disclaimer: This reading is for entertainment purposes only and shouldn't be taken seriously or used as a substitute for medical and professional advice. It's also a general reading, so it may or may not resonate with you.
┈─★ How to choose: Close your eyes, take a deep breath and choose the image that catches your attention the most – trust your intuition.
MASTERLIST | PAID READINGS
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── .✦ PILE 1
Shufflemancy: Where The Lovers Go - Ghost Kisses, The End Of Love - Florence, Please Be Angry - Pierz Barry, Smaller Than This - Sara Kays.
This is so cute, pile one! Your s/o has been in love with you since the first moment you met, but they never told you that before because they didn't want to scare you – and I'm happy to play my role here and let you know that ;). Honestly, you even made them nervous and shy when they were around you and that's so cute 😭
In the eyes of your s/o, you are much more than a simple romantic partner. No, you are their family – regardless of what your relationship with them is now, whether you are just friends, lovers or even married. This especially applies to those who met their s/o at difficult times in life or who are shifting to a DR with more adventure/action/danger. For them, you are a person who is there with them in both good times and bad times, whether in your personal life or in your couple's life for those who are already together with their partners. They see you as someone they can count on at all times and you can be sure that they are also the kind of person you can count on when you are going through dark times. In their eyes, you are each other's safe haven and they also think that you know them better than anyone else - so much so that you know when they are lying/pretending that they are okay. You make them feel safe and they trust you, so much so that they feel comfortable enough to open up to you and be vulnerable. Furthermore, because they love you so much, they are very afraid of ending up losing you at some point – but that is just an insecurity they have.
Wow, this is really sad but…many of the s/os in this pile feel awkward in their relationships. But not in a bad way, but because many of them may be dating for the first time, aren't used to being truly loved by those they love or don't have much experience with relationships in general that are healthy. For many, their s/o was raised in dysfunctional and/or toxic families and as a result, they carry a lot of trauma and emotional wounds that leave them feeling like “clumsy idiots” in your relationship. Some examples that illustrate this well are the fact that they are unable to express themselves effectively with words and even more extreme cases in which they would rather you be mad/angry at them than disappointed in them or that you leave them. In their view, they won't be able to handle it if you decide to leave them, so they do everything they can to keep you in their lives – I told you it was sad 😕. But, even with all the fear they felt inside about starting a new relationship, they decided to take the leap and can be sure that it was one of the best things that ever happened to them.
Your s/o perceives that you have self-esteem issues, that you have a distorted self-image and an inferiority complex. In their eyes, you may be trying to achieve an unrealistic/unattainable standard of beauty and this is costing you your mental health and your physical health. Some of you may even be skipping meals so if this is the case, PLEASE STOP FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODS!! To them this is crazy, because they love and accept you exactly the way you are and think you are being too hard on yourself – they care about you and your well-being, so they want you to take more care of yourself and treat your body like the temple it is. They would like you to see yourself the same way they see you, because in their eyes you are very attractive and hot and you shouldn't change anything about yourself 😋 (seriously, it was actually funny because I literally heard them calling you “hottie")
That was all, pile one! I hope you liked it and that it was accurate. You better take better care of yourself or your s/o and I will be forced to hit you 😠
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── .✦ PILE 2
Shufflemancy: Laughing on the Outside - FLOOR CRY, Shade - Chymes, You Know Me Too Well - Nothing But Thieves, Heat Waves - Glass Animals, Still Feel It All - MARO.
From the first moment you met, your s/o couldn't take their eyes off you and with each passing day, they found themselves falling more and more in love with you.
There are two situations in this pile: the first is that you and your s/o are not together as a couple yet and the second is that you have ended your relationship.
Regardless of what your case may be, your s/o are madly in love with you ‍🧎‍♂️ and every day they have to pretend that they are okay even with the fact that you are separated or have to pretend to others around them that they are not in love with you – but as a good gossip, I am here to expose what they really feel MUAHAHA. But, stopping for a moment to analyze, deep down they feel very sad not to be with you and that leaves them heartbroken.
Seriously, they are so in love with you that they seem drunk with love. When you are together, their heart warms. They may even try to deny it, but they can't help the fact that they want you like they've never wanted anyone in their life so much. Absolutely all they want most is you and they want to give you all of them and everything you want – your wish is your command.
For some of you reading this pile, you and your s/o are still just friends and in their eyes, you know them very well. But, regardless of what your case is, in their view, you have no idea what they are going through. I believe that for s/os who are just your friends, it is becoming more difficult to deal with the fact that they have fallen in love with you and cannot reveal it for fear of rejection or the friendship ending. Some of them may be thinking that you don't feel the same way about them and that they should leave you – poor things, little do they know how wrong they are.
Help, they are really heartbroken for you. Many of them have been in love with you for a long time and they have never been able to get over it. Sometimes they may try to tell themselves that they are over you, but just seeing you makes them fall to their knees – just seeing your eyes, your mouth and especially smelling your perfume. They really want you to want them as much as they want you 😮‍💨.
They may think that every love story ends in tragedy, that they might not be enough or that you deserve someone better, but when it comes to the two of you, they are willing to try. Sometimes all they think about is you.
That was all, pile two! I hope you liked it and that it resonated with you. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD GO KISS THIS MAN/WOMAN SOON 😭 they're suffering-
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── .✦ PILE 3
Shufflemancy: C’est toi qu'elle préfère - Alice et Moi, Breezeblocks - Alt-J, all my daugthers - dodie, Impossible - Nothing But Thieves, If You Let Me - Sinéad Harnett.
The s/os in this pile are an enigma to me 🤔 but I'll be able to solve them
Many of you reading this pile are not together with your s/o, but the other part already is. And, regardless of your situation, it seems that in your s/o's eyes, they are replaceable in your life. They feel like you will leave them or that you prefer other people – in some ways, they may feel like “the other woman”.
But, none of these scenarios are real and these things are only happening in their minds – these paranoias originate from insecurities they have due to negative experiences in the past, such as being dumped or not being the priority of the person who hurt them. These thoughts make your s/o's heart sink, but as I mentioned earlier, they are creating problems that don't exist - so one piece of advice is to reassure them that you love them, that you are there for them, that you really care and who will not exchange it or leave it. They love you so much and are so afraid of losing you, they are almost begging you not to leave them – even if you have no intention of doing so.
Your s/o can see that you have imposter syndrome even though you try not to give a shit about it – you always feel like you're a fraud in every successful thing you do and in every achievement you achieve, even if it's totally your merit and they want you to learn to recognize that you are good at what you do and that you should give yourself all the credit you deserve!!
Your s/o are fools in love with you – the type where sometimes they even catch themselves looking at you with a passionate smile on their face – and they themselves never believed that this kind of situation would happen to them but, here we are lol. Seriously, if you were the ocean, they would dive deep into you. They love the smell of your perfume, in their eyes it is unforgettable. They also really like your mouth – if you're already together, believe me, they love kissing you.
WHAT A BEAUTIFUL THING, PILE THREE!!
Your s/o's love you like never before, literally no one has ever loved you as much as they do. They love you so much that they would really do ANYTHING for you and they are such good partners that they will do for you even what you didn't even know you needed. But, in their view, you still won't let them in (or haven't let them in yet if you're already together). WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? For them to love you this way, you need to open your heart to them because they have a lot of love to give you and it is more than enough.
That was all, pile three! I really hope you enjoyed this reading and that it resonated with you. You literally won the s/o lottery, so DON'T LET IT GET AWAY!! 😠 Until the next PAP! ♡
© nocturniashifter – don't copy, redistribute or edit my content | dividers
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deathofacupid · 9 months ago
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intellectual | peter parker
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summary: you overhear something you weren't supposed to, but it shouldn't have been said in the first place. in result, you can't help but wonder if peter wants something different.
warnings: implied smut, mentions of sex, insecurity, use of y/n
pairing: bimbo!reader x frat!peter
word count: 3.0k+ words (my longest fic yet-)
a/n: in no way is use of "bimbo" meant to be a patriarchal stereotype. please do not take it offensively, this is a work of fiction.
M.LIST | RULES/REQUESTING | ABOUT ME
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peter was totally smitten by you. really, he was. after all he's been through, it was kind of nice having someone who adores him as much as he does, even if you are... a tad bit dim-witted.
while he grew up surrounded by death, trauma, and more, you were raised sheltered, hidden away from all the bad things. and even though peter's been through some shit, he finds it to hold you so gently, like the pretty thing you are, as if you were stained glass; fragile, but so beautiful.
when he's holding you, all his soft, brown eyes can focus on are how your soft, manicured hands wrap around his rough, calloused ones. you're always careful not to hurt him with your acrylics.
even though you can be slow at times, it's almost impossible not to admire the way your clothes always hug your curves, glossed lips pulled into a pretty pout.
peter could have just about any girl he wanted on campus, but he didn't want any of them.
he wanted you, and only you.
maybe it's because you were different, and no, not in dim-witted nature. but because of how soft you were. you didn't know, and even if you did, understand the horrors he wittnessed out there everyday.
you were protected by a little (very pink) bubble that you lived in, so when he came home to you, it felt as if he was in a different world altogether. you were so damn good at distracting peter, and you didn't even know it.
you were in your own dorm room, watching a silly rom-com while peter was with his friends, he told you not to wait up for him, given that he would be up 'til the early hours of the morning. but you decided that peter and his goodnight kisses were slightly more important than your beauty sleep.
slightly.
you furrowed your neatly shaped eyebrows at something that one of the characters said, tilting your head.
ram-i-fic-a-tion? you thought, humming. pulling out your phone, you googled the word.
noun plural noun: ramifications
a consequence of an action or event, especially when complex or unwelcome. "any change is bound to have legal ramifications"
"legal ram-i-fic-a-tions?" you wondered aloud.
you skimmed the rest of the definitions, still confused. surely peter wouldn't mind if you gave him a quick ring? so you went ahead in did that, letting the sound echo in the room.
when he didn't pick up, you frowned.
"ummm..." you trailed off, calling one of his friends, spencer, instead. you weren't a stranger to him, but more of a mutual. after all, your roommate was dating him. actually, you'd ask alyssa, your roomie, but she wasn't here.
much to your happiness, spencer did pick up. "hiii, spence."
"y/n?" he said, slurring slightly.
"what does, like, ram-i-fic-a-tion mean?" you asked, careful to enunciate.
spencer was aware of... how your brain worked, and he wasn't a jerk about it (unlike some people). he was one of peter's closer friends, so you felt comfortable around him.
"ramification? oh, uh, it's like a consequence."
you frowned dumbly, "to what?"
"to an action. if you don't study for the final, you might not do well. that's a consequence to your action. a ramification."
"oh. oh! okay. thank you!"
he didn't disconnect right away, and you could hear one of his frat brothers, you were unsure who, talking. and of course, you strained your ears to listen.
"it doesn't get annoying or anything?"
you heard peter's voice come next, and instantly perked up. "what?"
"dude, be so for real. she's hot, but like, as dumb as a third grader. do you have to talk to her like that too?" he laughed.
oof, you thought, sucks to be whoever it was they were talking about.
"sometimes. she's good in bed, though."
wait. he was talking about you. your jaw dropped. i mean, you were stupid, but not this stupid. so this is what "saturday night with the boys" was all about?
you heard collective laughing. you did stupid things sometimes, but never had the mental compacity to be embarrased by them. this, though? this was different.
you trusted peter.
he was the only person who never, ever, spoke to or about you like that. in fact, it was one of the reasons you'd grown to like him so much. because he was patient, he was kind, and never did he once judge you.
well, that's what you thought.
but you were dumb enough to think that just because he never spoke about it to you, he never spoke about it all.
you immediately disconnected the call, dropping your phone. trying to focus back on the movie, you nibbled on a piece of popcorn.
but you just couldn't get over it. did it bother him?
all the questions? the dim-witted stupidity? all the pink?
reluctantly, you glanced the hot pink bowl that held your snack.
you didn't mean to be so... like that. you were just being yourself. did peter not like you being yourself? no, no, of course not. if he didn't, then why would he be with you?
a little voice in the back of your head rang out; "because you're good in bed."
maybe it wouldn't hurt to try and raise your iq?
you turned off the tv, hot pink popcorn bowl forgotten. alyssa wouldn't mind if you borrowed something, right?
you opened her room door, walking over to her bookself. wrinkling up your nose, you scanned her shelf. how could someone like reading so much?
it was so... gross.
oh, well. maybe peter was into intellectuals. and you had better become before he left you for someone like that.
your eyes paused at a book titled "the hobbit".
"what's a... hobbit?" you asked, not to anyone in particular. you skipped it, looking at her other ones.
"'twisted love', 'the fault in our stars'... what'd the stars do?" picking up the book, you read the back. "huh," you remarked, putting it back.
instead, you grabbed a couple self-help books, struggling to hold them with your acrylic nails, which, of course, were bright pink... accentuated with big charms; bows and hearts.
you went back over to your room, dumping them on your bed. checking your nails again, you drummed them against your palm to make sure they were intact.
you started reading the first one, curling up in a blanket, but you kept getting distracted. every five seconds, you look up to make sure your lashes were still in place, or that your skin wasn't to shiny, or that your hair was still perfect. and to be honest, you didn't really understand any of it.
like, who actually had the patience to read through all of it? how could a book cure all your crap?
and why would you read a book to feel better, when you could go to a spa, or a shopping spree.
credit cards were invented for a reason.
but you powered through, at the very least, you skimmed the words. there was no way you could read it word for word. but you wanted to try... for peter.
you wanted him to stick around, to love you, but not superficially. not for sex.
you stayed up until 1:30 (mostly reading, and you still didn't understand how people did this for fun), but didn't call peter. you'd talk to him tomorrow, maybe. first, you needed to get your facts straight. eventually, you got ready for bed.
this included showering, taking off your makeup, putting your hair in rollers, and your fifteen-step skincare routine.
you may have been half asleep, but you'd never skip a step.
peter came over around noon monday, when neither of you had classes. "jeez, babe," he groaned, you in his lap, "i've got so much to do. seriously, i'm never gonna get it done."
you twirled your hair, appearing nonchalant, "your mindset is either your best friend, or worst enemy."
you kept your eyes trained on your phone, waiting for peter to respond. looking up, you saw him blink. "uh... yeah. that was- that was very... un-y/n-like."
to be honest, you didn't even know what the saying meant. you just memorized it from your book. "was it dumb?"
"no, it was smart," peter replied, kissing your hairline.
"i'm normally dumb?" you asked, tearing up. lips pouted, voice moist, you made eye contact with him. you knew you were a little slow, but dumb? really?
"no! that's not what i meant. it just sounded- well, i- cause you never say stuff like that. you're my smart, pretty girl."
"oh, okay," you said, your nails tracing the curve of his back. you pecked him on the lips, but he brought you back for a longer kiss.
you giggled as he flipped your positions, peter on top.
"can i show you just how pretty you are?"
he didn't have to ask twice.
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you were in the dining hall, sitting with some of your friends, mixed with some of peter's.
they were talking as you picked at your salad, leaning into peter.
"ugh," sarah, you kind-of friend started, "my boss gave me a premotion."
"what the fuck are you complaining about?" alyssa scoffed.
"because! it means that i have to do more...! like, i'll have to get up earlier. i dunno if i'll take it. it's cooler than the one i have now, but but it's not as comforting."
you spoke up, completely confident, "commit to change. either embrace the challenge of pursuing your destiny or shy way and live in regret."
collective "oohs" and "damns" were heard around the table, and you reveled in it.
"okay, girl, you go."
"parker, when did your girlfriend get a braincell upgrade?" you looked at peter, waiting for him to shoot something back, but he didn't. you frowned slightly, going back to the salad.
it went on like that, you would pipe in and offer self-help advice (not really knowing what it meant) hoping for peter's attention. sometimes you got it, and sometimes you didn't.
it was fine, you wanted him to notice you. after all, you weren't reading for fun. you were doing it for him, so... just, like, notice already.
you'd been focusing so much on the self-help books, your nails had grown out, leaving space between your nail bed and acrylics. deciding to take some time away from the books and all their un-understandable wisdom, you wanted to paint your nails.
nothing to big, but more simple. you were finding it hard to turn the page with the large charms on the acrylics you normally had to.
you found some 100% acetone in your bathroom, so you soaked your nails, waiting for the acrylics to come off. once they got loose enough, they came off easily.
you did some prepping, then picked out two different shades of pink. you were about to start when you heard two long knocks, then two short ones.
(it was peter's special knock, so you'd always know when it was him.)
"come in!" you called out, and you saw a head of fluffy brown hair peek in.
"hey," he said, slipping in your room.
"hi, petey!"
he came up from behind you, hugging your waist. "whatcha doing?"
you opened a bottle of nail paint, "painting my nails."
"cute colors," he kissed your cheek, and you leaned in.
"right? pink is so pretty," you gushed.
"what are these?" peter asked, and you looked over curious as to what he was talking about.
"oh, just, like, lyss' books."
"yeah, but why're they in here?" he read the back of one, raising a brow.
you continued painting your nails, trying to appear chill. "i was reading them."
he seemed to do a double-take, and you frowned, "what?"
"nothing- nothing, i just..."
"i know how to read," you said, shoulders sagging. "i'm smarter than a third-grader," you didn't catch the slip-up, but he did.
that caught him off guard there, "what?"
"what?" looking up, you finally met his eyes.
"you said you- well, yeah, i know. you just don't-" he paused, "self-help books didn't seem like your thing is all. oh, is that why've you been saying all that?"
"saying what?"
"all the-" he didn't want to hurt your feelings, but if he was right, he already had. "the, um, advice?" he stammered. peter didn't trip over his words often, and you knew that.
you were sure that he knew that you knew, but you weren't sure if he knew for sure.
you shrugged, "doesn't it sound smart?"
"no, yeah, it does." he's treading very carefully. it was quiet for a brief moment; "did you hear?"
"hear what?"
"the... the comment i made?"
"oh, that one about me being stupid, but good in bed?" you said it so casually, as if it didn't bother you at all.
but it did. he knew it did.
he sighed, "i'm really sorry, baby."
"for what?"
"for saying that."
"no, you're sorry you got caught. you wouldn't have said it if you didn't mean it."
"i didn't- i was drunk," peter tried again.
"drunk words are sober thoughts," something else you read, you aren't sure where.
he was starting to get really nervous. he didn't know what was going through your head, normally he had a good idea, but it wasn't anything like this. it didn't seem like you hated him, but he wasn't about to take advantage.
"no, i-"
"it's okay. i'm working on it," you said, trying to make him feel better. as if you were the one who'd messed up, not peter. the idea itself was insane to him, and it only made him feel worse.
"angel," peter started, "this is not your fault. please don't make it your fault. i'm the one who messed up, and what i said was not okay. it was a stupid, drunk joke, and i shouldn't said it."
you blew on your nails, blinking back your tears. mascara, the good stuff, was expensive. you looked up, shocked to see tears in his eyes. you don't think you've ever seen him cry before. well, maybe once, when you watched "titanic" with him.
peter wasn't one to get emotional, he still denied ever crying over that movie.
"it's okay," you repeated again. you were dumb, you knew that. it really wasn't his fault, you shouldn't have pushed him to feel like that.
"but it's not. and i know you know that, please tell me what i can do to make it better."
"but-"
"no, it's not," he said sternly, "and i cannot stress that enough. i'm really sorry, baby."
you capped the polish, you didn't know what to say. it wasn't your fault? okay, fine.
maybe he was right.
"i got really upset," you admitted.
"i know, baby," the tears are falling, he quickly wipes them away.
"did you really mean it?"
"no, no, no, of course not. i absolutely love you the way you are, and you shouldn't have to change yourself for anyone- especially not for me."
"so you don't think i'm only good for sex?"
"baby, no, baby, no!" baby, he used that word for affection; when he was guilty, trying to prove something to you... in this case, how sorry he was. "you are good for so many other things," he paused, "okay, that didn't sound great."
he took a deep breath, taking your freshly painted hands in yours, "don't mess up the polish," you warned, even though you were tearing up.
peter smiled slightly, that meant you weren't too upset, right? that he hadn't fucked everything up by great means?
"i haven't ever met someone like you, who loves me the same back. and i don't mean generally, but romantically. lots of people can't put up with me," he started, "but you do, and jesus, baby, i'm so greatful for that- and you," peter added.
"you are the bright pink light of my life. you're so different from other girls i've been with, you see me. you don't look at me, you see me. like, okay, maybe you aren't the greatest at math, but you don't have to be a s.t.e.m. genius to be smart."
peter was getting raw, he was getting vunerable. "i don't know how to use a curling iron for the life of me, i don't know the difference between mascara and eyeliner. well, i do, but i didn't before you."
you looked at him, opening your mouth to speak. you wanted to tell him he'd lost you somewhere along the line, but figured it was important for him to get this out.
"you've got a different mindset than me, and i love that. you're the biggest feminist i've ever met, and wait until you meet may. i think it's interesting that your entire personality doesn't revolve around your degrees and resumes, because, god, people like that are annoying. most of all, you're confidence is amazing. i never had anything like that in high school."
you knew that he was a nerd, kept his head down, shoulders sagging. "i just... i'm sorry. i don't know why i said it. i'm a huge insecure jerk that thinks he can get away with crap by projecting it onto his lovely, amazing, wonderful girlfriend. you're my favorite person, and i can't help but think you'll leave me one day. i thought that if i acted like i didn't care... i don't know. i- i don't... i'm sorry."
you took moment, that's the longest he's ever spoken to you, but he wasn't done, apparently.
"also, i don't care about sex. i mean, it's nice and whatever, but what's the point of it if i don't have you. what i'm trying to say is, i'd pick you over that any day, okay? it doesn't matter to me. i'm not with you for that."
"thank you," you said, it seemed appropriate. basically, he just compliented you a whole lot, and it worked; you seem to have a thing for praising. "and i forgive you. also, i hated those stupid books, and if they weren't, like, alyssa's, i'd burn them."
you shuddered, "i can't believe i read them."
"really?" peter asked, hopeful. you kissed away a stray tear, looking into his wet eyes. "we're okay?"
"we're so okay," you paused, "but you have to watch bridgerton with me."
he groaned, "fine." (you knew he liked it, he just wouldn't ever admit to it.)
"wait, so just checking, you aren't into, like, intellectuals or whatever?"
"i'm into you," he said, "whether or not you idenify as one."
taglist: @whatsupstark @ell0ra-br3kk3r @idli-dosa @susvale @kdbsr-h @littlemsbumblebee @sflame15-blog @twinsunkithies @chocolateshepherddreamclod
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drunkinyourbenz · 2 months ago
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ALWAYS THERE FOR YOU
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☆ SYNOPSIS: your parents' excitment about the election results left you with a pit of dread in your stomach. luckliy for you, you had billie, who helped you through it all.
☆ RELATIONSHIP: billie eilish x fem!reader
☆ WARNINGS: angst, comfort, politics, right wing family, implied homophobic family, long distance relationship (during tour)
☆ REQUESTED? yes, anon
☆ NOTE: hi my loves, i saw this request and just had to write it right away (literally wrote it in half an hour lmao) for anyone needing comfort as well as the anon who requested this, i hope you're doing okay. i'm not from america, but i'm also deeply dissapointed about the election results, and i feel for all of you who are there. i hope i did this request justice, i don't have a family who's like super against my views so i hope this is okay <3 anyone with family celebrating like the readers is in this story, please imagine me giving you the biggest hug rn, i hope you're coping okay. my dms are always open if you want to talk about anything at all, i love you all, please stay safe <33
☆ WORD COUNT: 1.2k words
you and billie had been dating for a while now, and she made you happier than anyone ever had before. she was your other half, and without her you would feel incomplete. you weren’t on tour with her, much to both of your disappointments. but you’d had personal things that took up your time at the start of tour, so the plan was that you’d join her once she came on tour to your city, and you’d join her for the rest of tour. despite not being on tour with her, your mind always drifted back to her, she had a permanent residence in your heart. 
so naturally, on election night, you sat in your room thinking about her. you wanted nothing more than to be held by her in this moment, you’d slipped away from dinner as soon as you could, but you could still hear your family’s excited chatter coming from downstairs. the fact that they were happy about the way it was going, the way they wanted a future that was so drastically different from the one you had in your mind… it stung. your parents genuinely wanted a future that you weren’t sure whether you had a place in, and you didn’t really know what to do with that information.
you were trying to stay off social media, to stay away from the news, because you knew it wouldn’t help you—you couldn’t change a thing. but every few minutes, you’d end up switching back to the tab on your laptop with the live updates, feeling a sense of dread settling in your stomach. you couldn’t quite comprehend how so many more people had voted for him, the man who made you genuinely fear for your future. 
so finally, you texted billie. you needed her comfort, even though it would just be her voice over a call. you needed her. 
can i call you??
billie replied not long after, her text simple. 
bils: ofc baby
her contact calling you came up on your screen before you could even move to call her, and you automatically accepted the face time. her face popped up on your phone after a moment, and as well as the tiredness from tour you’d been seeing so much of lately, she looked just as crestfallen as you. the two of you shared the same opinions on this, and you knew how much billie cared about it. 
just as the call loaded properly, you heard a loud cheer from downstairs, and you couldn’t stop the grimace that appeared on your face. billie’s lips curved down in a soft, sympathetic frown, “oh, baby.” 
a sigh left your lips, the sound somewhat defeated, “i just… i don’t know how they want that. it feels like they want a future that i’m not safe in–” billie cut you off with an understanding sigh, she knew that if she let you keep talking, you’d simply spiral. she knew what you meant, you felt a rift between you and your parents, you felt unsure of what that meant for your relationship with them. billie herself had never experienced it, with her own family being supportive and sharing her views, but she had always been good at comforting you. 
“i’m so sorry, baby. you know that me and my family have always got you, no matter what, yeah? we’ve got your back, we’re always here for you. all of us.” 
your lips curled into a soft pout, her words lessening the sadness you were feeling. “i love your family.”
she smiled softly at you, “and we love you. always.” 
you cracked a small smile at her words, the disappointment behind your eyes still very much evident, but you felt an overwhelming feeling of love for the people in your life. even if your blood-related family didn’t understand, you had your chosen family. that small fact that you had your people, who agreed with you on these things, it helped to soften the blow of your parents wanting the country to go down such a different path than you did. only slightly, but it helped. you felt the pain dull slightly. 
the two of you stayed on the phone for a while, billie distracting you from your parents downstairs by telling you about the tour so far. obviously, she was also upset about everything going on, but she knew you needed this support and that was more important than talking about it. she just wanted you to feel okay. you could feel the emotions hanging around both of you even through the phone, but you appreciated that she wasn’t mentioning them right now. you’d have plenty of time to talk about the election later, once you didn’t feel so despairing about the future. 
after about half an hour of the two of you just talking, you decided to ask her something. 
“bils?” 
“hmm?” she hummed, looking up as if she could sense the importance of what you were about to say even through one word. 
“do you… do you think i could join you on tour a bit earlier than planned? i just don’t know if i can stay in this house for any longer, it’s just–”
“of course.” 
her instant, firm reply cut off your rambling and you sighed in relief, “thank you–”
“don’t thank me, darling. i just want you to feel safe.” she paused, thinking, “you could join us on the minnesota dates, if you want. there’s two days there, so it gives you more time to get here. i can book you a flight–” 
you smiled at her considerate words, the way she was taking everything into account. oh, how you loved her. “that sounds perfect. and don’t book first class this time, jesus. i can put up with an economy flight, i’m used to them. plus,  i get to see you at the end of it.” 
she smiled warmly, “mm, you do. and then i’m wrapping you up in a massive hug and never letting you go, because i love you.” 
you giggled softly at her words, “i think i’m looking forward to seeing maggie more, actually.” 
billie rolled her eyes fondly, her mother just adored you. “i don’t blame you.” 
the two of you talked into the night, and were still on the call when you woke up. you weren’t aware that you’d fallen asleep, and you probably wouldn’t have if it weren’t for her soothing voice.
it was now the early hours of the morning, soft sunlight streaming through the curtains you’d forgotten to shut. the house had gone silent by now, your parents finally asleep, and you felt a tiny bit of peace just laying there in the silence. you looked at the screen for a moment, simply admiring her pretty sleeping face, the way her eyelashes fluttered slightly and her chest rose and fell with each breath. this time in a few days, you’d be in her arms again. 
you let out a soft sigh. the country may be falling apart by the seams, but you had billie. you had her, so you’d be okay. 
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markrosewater · 2 months ago
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As someone who only recently got properly into Magic this year my stance on the recent UB Standard legality is that so long as the mechanics are good, fun to play, and work well with the other Standard legal sets then I don't particularly care if Final Fantasy is legal.
But.
There is something about the Marvel Universe being Standard Legal that feels off. Final Fantasy shares many aesthetic and gameplay similarities to Magic that make it slide into the general ecosystem better from a Look/Feel perspective. Meanwhile, as much of a Spider-Man fan as I am, it is going to be incredibly weird seeing Peter Parker or Miles Morales face off against the critters of Bloomburrow, even more than Thunder Junction or Duskmourn do.
I will attend the Final Fantasy and Spider-Man prereleases because I love playing Magic and I am interested in both sets, but I cannot shake the feeling that this decision makes the overall play experience strange, especially since SIX Standard sets of a year is way overdoing it (maybe 3 In-Universe sets and 1 UB set would be a better balance?)
I understand the decision from a logical standpoint but the emotional reaction to Magic losing some of its Qualia is something that I can't ignore
I have read many of the responses to my request for emotional responses yesterday (I will continue reading - there are just a lot of people sharing). A common through line is the feeling of loss, that the decisions we’ve been making are taking things away from them.
So, I wanted to take a moment to talk about something that I believe Universes Beyond is adding to the game. I’m not talking about value to other people that aren’t you, but something that is upside to the enfranchised players that are the backbone of the game.
As I’m head designer, my focus is on mechanics and the core gameplay experience of playing the game. Universes Beyond has been a bolt of energy for the design of the game.
Because so many of you are sharing personal stories, I’ll use my own experiences as a way to illustrate my point.
One day, when I was seven or eight, I woke up and went downstairs to see that my Dad had bought me a comic book and left it out on the counter for me as a surprise. It was Spider-Man.
I must have read that comic ten times. It was the start of a life long love of comic books. I’m not quite sure why the superhero genre, in particular, spoke to me so strongly, but it did.
As a teenager I was a bit of an outcast, and when I stumbled upon the X-Men, it felt like a story that was core to my lived experience. I too was an outsider, but out there were people like me and if I could find those people, we could bond over our similarities.
I enjoy designing Magic. I mean really, really enjoy designing Magic. I don’t throw around the term “dream job” lightly. It is truly a lifelong passion. I spend so much time writing about it because it is something that brings me so much joy, and there is a desire to share that joy with others, my found family that shares my similarities.
Designing Marvel cards has been electrifying. I have spent years mastering the art of Magic design. Getting to combine that with my love of Marvel characters has been inspirational. It has inspired to make designs I would have never thought of.
It has pushed me in directions I couldn’t have predicted and resulted in designs that tickle both my inner Mel and Vorthoses.
And it hasn’t just affected my own designs. I have given more notes on card designs than I have in my twenty nine years at Wizards.
For example, the amount of back and forth with Aaron who designed the five Secret Lair cards we recently revealed at New York ComicCon was exhaustive. He and I have long bonded over our shared love of Marvel, so getting to translate that into Magic with him has been amazing.
And each Universes Beyond product we’re making has people as equally passionate about that property.
My point is from purely a design perspective, Universes Beyond has had huge dividends. It has inspired us to make fresh new designs. It has sparked creativity. We are making awesome card designs, mechanics, themes, and sets, things that most likely wouldn’t have come into existence otherwise.
The passion that beloved characters and worlds has inspired in us is translated into amazing Magic design, something that will make the act of playing Magic better for anyone who enjoys the nuts and bolts of the raw gameplay of Magic.
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catssluvr · 4 months ago
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hey not sure what your boundaries are but this shouldn’t cross any hopefully!
Could I request a season 16/17 emily x fem!reader where they have a conversation over the phone that goes from work to random to just plain flirting with each other and then it ends up as a facetime. Then at work the next day they are constantly eyeing each other up because they basically confessed their feelings the night before and then emily calls her into her office and they kiss or something?
P.S You can change it however you see fit and, I read you’re ‘drunk in love’ fic and I adored it!
Thank you so much!
y'all have the cutest ideas! ty for requesting angel <3
i’m so glad you liked ‘drunk in love’ 🤍
𝒑𝒉𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒄𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒔, emily prentiss
s16/17!emily prentiss x fem!reader
a late night call with your boss turns into a confession (and an absolute mess of a day at work)
warnings: mentions of a broken wrist, insecurities (r), kissing, making out?
·˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛
You sunk deeper into the sofa's cushion, fluffy blanket up to your legs and a mug of warm tea resting in the coffee table in front of you. You momentarily eyed the printed "I <3 my boss" on the mug before returning your attention to the tv, smiling at the memory of Emily presenting it to you on last year's secret Santa of the bau. It was tacky, letters slowly fading from the use (still your favorite) and for some reason that made it even more valuable to you. You would never admit it but it was always your go to for coffee and tea, specially while working from home for a whole month.
About a month before, you had fell while chasing an unsub. Resulting in a fractured wrist and a sore knee. The day after, you had shown up to work just to be sent home by Emily herself, insisting that being at home would help you get better faster. You were pretty sure she wouldn't have sent any other of her agents home because of a broken wrist but you opted to not overthink it too much. If you did, you would probably spend the whole month questioning if she considered you weaker or less capable than them.
Even though your job could be more than tiring most of the time, you were starting to go mad from sitting on your sofa with a laptop on your lap for entire days.
You phone rang from it's place on the coffee table, Emily's picture appearing right after.
"Hey, boss." You answered, nothing but confused. It was relatively late and you were waiting for anything but a call from your boss, the one you happened to be down bad for.
"Hey, just wanted to check on you. Ready to come back tomorrow?" Her voiced sounded through your phone, warmth spreading over your chest by simply the sound of her voice.
"Never felt more ready, actually. If i had to have that cast on my arm for one more day i would've have probably ripped it open with my own nails." You sighed grumpily but quickly replaced your frown with a small smile.
"Yeah, i'm sure getting to work from your couch must be exhausting, missy." She humoured and you could predict that she had a teasing smile on her face.
"Not exhausting, but very boring." You knew she was only joking but couldn't help yourself from wanting to explain. The last thing you wanted was for your boss to think you're lazy. "Besides, i miss Pen and JJ way too much to wait any other day to see my girls." You added.
"Ouch. Great to know i'm missed." It was not news for you to have comfortable conversations with her. Emily was not only your boss but also a friend you cared a lot for - way too much. But today her voice sounded overly soft, almost as if she was relieved you were returning tomorrow. She doesn't like you that way, she's just being a good boss.
"I thought you being the best boss was a fact already." You laughed slightly.
"Yeah sure, call it what you will." Emily snorted.
"Well, does the fact i have the mug you gave me last year full of tea in my hand right now prove it?" You observed, taking a small sip of it.
"You're bluffing- i don't believe it until i see it." She scoffed, seeming weirdly surprised. Why wouldn't you be using the mug?
You thought for a second before saying, "We can manage that, turn on your camera."
"What?" She sounded even more surprised now, a chuckle leaving her lips.
"Just do it, Em." You retorted, well aware the nickname was enough to persuade her.
You waited for her to accept the facetime request before bringing the mug to your lips once more, making sure to leave the letters on full display.
"If i knew you were actually going to use the mug, i would've bought you a nicer one." She smiled and only then you noticed how much you missed it. Her smile. From what you could see, she appeared to be at the office. Her hair was tucked behind her ears, a few silver strands falling over her eyes that looked right back at you.
"I like my mug just fine like this." You returned her smile, eyes drifting lower to her dark blue button up. Two of the buttons were undone, showing just enough collarbone to make your heartbeat speed up.
"You look nice. That month did you good, you look well rested." The grey haired woman noted, your cheeks flushing. The compliment was subtle but you couldn't help the tingling sensation every time she praised you in any way.
"Aw you think i look nice?" You teased, holding back a smile when she rolled her eyes at the comeback. "I'm just messing, you know that. I think you look very good, too." You rested your head against the sofa, gaze fixated on her.
"That's hard to believe, i've been working since 7am. And after having two meetings with these new assholes that think they're better than anyone else, i think it's impossible to not look like a mess." She sighed. Emily did indeed look tired, the bags around her eyes and the way she was slightly slouching confirmed it. But that didn't make her any less beautiful, not to you. Or anyone with eyes.
"I see i'll have to kick some ass when i come back." You confirmed, pleased when she answered with a small smile. "I'm serious though, about you looking good." You breathed in before continuing, a rush of confidence suddenly appearing. "You always look pretty, Emily."
"I'm starting to think you only wanted my camera on so you could enjoy the view, uh?" Her voice came out shakier than she intended it to, but she quickly covered it with a smirk.
"I guess that wouldn't be a lie." You missed her too much to even bother denying it.
There was a comfortable silence for a few moments before she said in an almost whisper, "Thank you. Really."
"Nothing to thank me for. I'm always here, i care a lot- well maybe a bit too much sometimes." You didn't even think before uttering those last few words, embarrassment creeping right after.
She called your name softly and you could only manage to look at the mug in your lap, silence filling your living room again.
"I care about you, too. More than i should." The last part caught you off guard, eyes flickering up to look her in the eyes. I love you, is what you wanted to say next. But you sticked to a gentle nod, giving her a quick goodbye before hanging up.
˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛
The next day, you felt utterly stupid for hanging up so abruptly. Or maybe for accidentally confessing to the unit chef. Well, technically she confessed too. But everything had suddenly felt so overwhelming that the only solution you could think of was to run from it. Had she only said it because she pitied you? Did she mean it? These two questions were the only thing running around your head as you tried to focus in the files in front of you.
The only interaction you had with her was right when you walked in the bullpen, not really paying attention as you bumped into her. Mumbling out a small 'sorry' before scurrying away to your desk, not having time to process it since JJ was pulling you into a tight hug as soon as you put your bag down.
Thinking about it after, it had been painfully embarrassing and the only thing you wanted was to burry yourself in a hole far away from said chief.
For the rest of the morning, you would eye her every time she stepped out of her office, adverting your gaze when she'd look right back at you. Sometimes you could feel her intense gaze at the back of your head, body filling up with the familiar tingling - that was just a fraction of the impact she had on you.
With a frustrated sigh, you got up from your chair. Maybe some coffee would help you get some work done. Even though you were sure that just by looking at a mug, you would think back to the mug that was still sitting on your coffee table at home. Get it together, please.
"Agent." Emily's voice sounded behind you as you were adding sugar to you coffee. You didn't have to turn around to know it was her, you loved her voice too much to not recognize it.
"My office in five." She added before you could barely turn around, leaving to her office right after.
Well, fuck. You had exactly five minutes to prepare yourself for the humiliation it would be.
You closed your eyes tightly, exhaling a little too loudly. Making your way back to your desk and setting the mug there. You wiped your already sweaty hands on your trousers, taking slow steps towards Emily's office.
In that moment you were almost 100% sure that she had only said it out of pity. Her tone was stern and dry, almost as if she was just your boss. Maybe it was the way she always talked to you and you just hadn't noticed, too lost in your delusional. Maybe she was really just your boss, after all.
Your knuckles made contact with the door, leaving two knocks there.
"Come in." Her muffled voice sounded from the inside, encouraging you to open the door.
Stepping inside, you hesitantly approached her table, heart pounding against your chest.
"You can sit down if you wan-" She started but you soon interrupted her. The words bubbling up your throat before you could stop them.
"Look, Emily, i'm so sorry- i didn't mean to overstep. I know that you're my boss and it's completely inappropriate to have feelings for you, i didn't mean for it to slip. It's just- i had barely talked to you for a whole month and seeing you just made my feelings come back all over aga- and i shouldn't even be saying that! What i mean is that i know you don't feel the same and it would be easier to just pretend it didn't happen. Please." You voice came out way more cracked than you intend it to, the knot in your throat making it hard to speak.
"What the hell are you talking about?" When you finally got yourself to look at her, she was nothing but confusion. Wide eyes staring at you, mouth slightly agape.
"That's not why you called me in?" Your cheeks flushed, fingers playing with your shirt.
"Well yes. But with the intention of apologizing for making you uncomfortable." She got up from her chair, meeting you were you were standing. "I mean, you hung up quite abruptly yesterday and barely looked me in the eye this morning." You felt quite aware now of how your actions could have easily been misunderstood.
"Oh." You shoulder slumped, voice barely audible.
"Yes. Oh." Emily chuckled and you felt yourself finally aware of your surroundings.
She was standing mere inches away from you, breath slightly fanning against your cheek. One hand reached to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear before settling on your cheek, the other making its way to your waist. "Can i kiss you?" She whispered and you could feel your knees grow weak. She's perfect.
You nodded eagerly before she kissed you, lips moving softly against yours. The tingling sensation marking it's presence now beneath the skin she touched. Your fingers tangled in her grey hair as you pulled her impossibly closer.
Before the kiss could get too heated, she started peppering gentle kisses across your cheek. "Missed you." You could feel her smiling against you when your cheeks heated.
This time it was you who pressed your lips against hers, hands gripping the collar of her coat. She tasted like mint and you recognized it, her favourite gum she always made sure to have a stock of in her desk.
"Let me take you out tonight." She pulled away gently, arms wrapping around you in a comfortable embrace.
"Is that even a question?" You chuckled, quickly pecking her lips one more time.
Maybe being down bad for the unit chief wasn't as bad as you thought.
·˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛
a/n: pls make requests i’m so out of ideas 😭
i lowk hate the first part of this but whatever 💀
love,
cat 🤍
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atleastpleasetelephone · 1 month ago
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Can you do a smut with a hand kink.. please. I'd die.
Handle with care
A/N: In which Little Mouse discovers she has a thing for Elvis' hands...
Pairing: little mouse x Elvis
Word count: 1.9K
TWs: Fingering, borderline fisting (not quite), lots of fingers in mouth/sucking/licking, a tiny bit of struggling to breathe, blow job, bit of voyeurism, watching a dirty movie.
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You and Elvis are fooling around in the TV room, kissing and cuddling, when he remembers the film he’d made of the two of you and that pretty little thing Jerry had found for you to play with. It was a little while ago now that he’d watched you and her kiss and undress one another, and taught you how to please a woman just like he taught you how to please him, and it seems like just the time to refresh his memory. And yours. 
“Baby,” he coos, pulling away from the passionate kiss he’d been right in the middle of. 
“Yes, Daddy.”
“Ya wanna watch that movie we made? With Jessica?”
Your eyes grow wide. You hadn’t forgotten about it, exactly, but you had sort of pushed it out of your mind. You’d really enjoyed Jessica, but you’re not sure if you want to watch yourself enjoying her. 
“Mmmm,” you squeak, uncomfortably. 
He frowns. “What’s that lil squeak for, Mouse?”
You bite your lip. You know this is his fantasy, and you don’t want to spoil it. But still. 
“I jus’... hmmm. I have to watch myself?”
“Ya look gorgeous, baby. In that pink nightie I got ya. C’mon. Daddy wants to watch ya eat that pretty little girl again.”
You sigh softly. You don't want to look at your own face on a big screen, no matter how dolled up it might be, but you’re not sure this is an argument you’re going to win. There aren’t many arguments with Elvis that you have even a chance of winning, so you’ve learnt when to concede. It’s easier this way. 
“Okay.”
He kisses you on the forehead. “That’s my good girl. I’ll get it set up.”
Of course he doesn’t actually get it set up. It involves fiddling with a projector and a film, so he ends up getting Jerry in to sort it out, resulting in a lot of blushing for both you and Jerry, but somehow none for Elvis. Eventually it’s all sorted and Jerry bows out of the room as gracefully as he possibly can, closing the door behind him and heading to the other end of the house. Best to try and avoid hearing the noises he knows are coming. He thinks you’re very sweet and part of him doesn’t like to think of you like this. Another part of him likes it a lot, and that might be an even worse problem. 
The film starts, and you see yourself in the pink nightie with your hair all curled and your make-up done in that over the top way Elvis likes, and you cringe. This is even worse than you anticipated. You don’t mind watching yourself kiss Jessica when she’s taking up most of the frame, but right now you seem to be centre-stage. Then you see Elvis’ hand, taking yours and moving it onto Jessica’s breast. You remember how his hand felt, firm but gentle, guiding you where he wanted you. You can hear his soft low voice purring instructions into your ear “that’s it baby, jus’ give it a little squeeze. Good girl.” and it makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. But the more you watch the film, the more you’re drawn to his hands. To begin with, you just look at them to avoid looking at yourself so much. But then you find yourself really studying them, how long and slender his fingers are, how dexterously they move, how his rings glitter. And then you start to think about them touching you, just as his arm wraps around your shoulders and a hand squeezes your upper arm. There’s a tingling between your legs that intensifies as his other hand starts to make its way up your thigh, under your skirt. You hear your breathing get heavier, you’re almost panting with anticipation, thinking of those long fingers touching you, sliding inside you, curling and hitting that spot. 
He watches the movie with half an eye on your reaction to it. You didn’t seem like you were enjoying it too much to begin with, but now as his fingers reach your panties and press against them he realises you’re as turned on as he is. He loves watching you with another girl, seeing you unsure and then gaining your confidence, watching the pleasure on your face as she licks between your legs and the pleasure on hers as you eat her like pussy is going out of fashion. He hooks your panties to one side and rubs a finger against you. 
“Mmmm. Daddy.” It comes out almost against your will, and you give him a sidelong glance. 
He bites his lip. “Enjoyin’ yourself, little mouse?”
You nod quickly, spreading your legs wide for him. He slides a finger inside you and is surprised by your reaction. Head thrown back, hips bucking, whimpers falling from your lips. You don’t usually react this much to just a finger. He looks up to the screen and sees Jessica’s face, flushed with arousal, taking up most of the screen. It must be her. He feels a twinge of jealousy and tries to push it down. He wanted to watch this, and he’s enjoying it. It’s fine that you’re enjoying it too. It’s more than fine. It’s great. He slides another finger in after the first and you moan, your eyes fixed on the screen. He tears his gaze away from your face to look at the screen too, seeing your head between the other girl’s legs as she moans and writhes. He pumps his fingers in and out of you a few more times, but his dick is getting uncomfortably hard and he wants to fuck you now. Make you forget the girl on the screen and just think about him. 
You’re staring at the way his hands are gripping Jessica’s legs, pulling them apart for you, when you feel him start to slide his fingers out. You instinctively grab his forearm to stop him and he looks at you inquisitively. 
“Don’t stop,” you whisper, fingers wrapping tightly around his arm now.
“Whaddya want, Mouse?” He asks, still uncomprehending. 
“Your fingers, Daddy,” you moan. 
He’s a little taken aback by your admission, but if that’s what you want that’s what he’ll give you. He helps you rearrange yourself on the sofa so you’re lying down properly, and pulls your panties off too. 
“How many fingers, Mouse?” He asks, his breath hot on your ear as he leans over you, two long digits sliding back inside. 
You squeak, momentarily struck dumb by the question, caught in the intensity of his gaze. “However many fit, Daddy,” you finally manage to whisper. 
Elvis’ dick presses even more determinedly against the fabric of his pants. He’s never heard you be this damn dirty before, and it’s really really turning him on. 
“Let’s see, shall we?” 
He pushes in a third finger to join the first two, slowly pumping them together until he feels you start to relax. Watching the look on your face, the way you flush with pleasure, the gentle undulation of your body as you react to his fingers rubbing inside you, he has an idea. He has two hands and you have a very obliging mouth. Leaning a little so his weight is more on his knees, he pushes the index finger of his other hand past your unresisting lips. Watching as your eyes grow wide, he feels your tongue swirl around it. Increasing the pace with his other hand, he slides another two fingers into your mouth. Your pussy is nice and wet and relaxed now, and he can feel it pulling his fingers further inside. 
“One more finger, little one?”
You nod quickly and he adds a finger to your pussy and your mouth. Spit runs down your chin as you moan and struggle slightly to breathe through your nose.  
Elvis is starting to think he might cum just from watching this, seeing you so wanton and dirty. It’s a struggle to get the fourth finger in to begin with, but he’s patient and he keeps gently thrusting those four fingers in and out of your pussy and gradually they go in further and further until he’s in up to his knuckles, only his thumb on the outside now. He pulls his fingers out of your mouth and shuffles up on the sofa so he’s kneeling next to your head. He can’t just watch you like this and not have you touch him. 
“Open up, baby.”
You open your mouth obediently and his dick slides in where his fingers had been. He groans, trying hard to continue to concentrate on fingering you now your mouth is all around him. Sitting up so you can stroke him into your mouth, the change in position means he’s suddenly hitting exactly where you want him to as he shoves his hand inside you over and over again. You know you're going to cum, and seconds later you’ve let go of his dick and fallen back onto the sofa, pleasure rushing through your body as a powerful orgasm hits you. 
“Ohhhh fuck.”
He loves watching you cum, and this is no exception. He rubs his fingers against your walls a few more times, coaxing you through your high, and then when he’s sure you’re done he removes his hand, briefly looking at the way it's covered in your juices before returning to his own pleasure. Your eyes are closed in bliss, but he pushes his dick back into your mouth anyway, one hand underneath your head to help you as he starts to pump himself with the other. Groaning, he feels his release heavy in his balls.
“Ready for me, baby?” He growls. 
You squeak and nod your head as best you can, your eyes open again now as you try to take a little more of him. He pumps his hand faster and faster until he’s moaning and cumming down your throat, making your eyes water as he thrusts a little too enthusiastically. You swirl your tongue around him until he pulls out and falls down next to you, holding out his other hand to your lips. 
“Here. Lick ‘em clean for me honey, since you like ‘em so much.”
You take his hand in both of yours and gently slip one finger into your mouth at a time, licking them clean slowly and carefully, your big eyes looking over at him as you do it. God, you really do love everything about his hands right now. 
“Good girl,” he hums. 
You let the final finger out of your mouth with a pop and then smile at him. “Thank you, Daddy.”
He strokes your cheek. “Thank you, little mouse.” He settles down next to you, the movie still playing in the background. You’re both quiet for a while, enjoying the warm fuzzy feeling after your orgasms. Then he wonders something. 
“Hey, what made ya suddenly like my hands so much?”
You giggle shyly. “They were the only things I liked looking at in the movie,” you tell him, taking a hand in both of yours again and stroking the back of it.
“Is that so?” 
“Mmm. Just wanted to look at you.” You look over at him through your lashes, still stroking his hand. 
He smiles and kisses you gently. “I only wanna look at you too, you pretty little thing.”
***
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