#I don’t know if I’ve ever gotten more gender envy from a person than I have alpharad like hoooooooo my god I wish I looked like him

[determinedowl23]

been into smash bros for 3 years and have FINALLY found a youtuber use he/him for sheik

on behalf of trans people thank you jacobalpharad

[sebastianshaw]

Gud morning folks. For new followers, on Munday I just do a random dump of OOC rambles that have nothing to do with Shaw or this blog. Under the cut is stuff about animals, my suspicions of the “mean lesbian” Tumblr trope, and how I don’t have a Spotify but what my list would be if I did:

- I really, really miss riding horses. I get the occasional trail ride once or twice a year, but I want to do more than just sit there on a walk through the woods. I want to actually RIDE again, like actually DO THINGS---trot, turn, canter, maybe even jump. I miss it a lot. - I’m very proud of my chinchillas and how well-socialized they are! They’re friendly to strangers, and will try to go to not only my dad, but also my mom and sister when I hold them near them. Chinchillas are very timid animals, hard to win over, and typically bond with only one person, so this is really awesome for them! - Fun fact about me, I am the most timid little person in public. I am lowkey terrified of people and always ready to bolt when I’m alone. I still go out and get a soda and stuff, just I’m very high-alert and I’m super non-confrontational. I basically have the same defense as an opossum, in that I try to be as contrite and apologetic as possible to avoid trouble. But when I am out with a female friend, I just go like, full guard-dog mode internally. I’m completely ready to fight the fuck out of anyone who bothers her. I had mostly forgotten this about myself because I’ve been in quarantine so long, but when I went to see my friend this month and we went walking the dogs in a dark park with no one else around, I was like, I will absolutely kill someone tonight if I have to.  - I’ve been having rat anxiety dreams again. Basically scenarios in which I fail to take care of my rats and they suffer/die for it, or there’s too many rats to take care of at once :C - I have made jokes about being a “mean lesbian” myself because of how I rag on any male fave I have, or how I just don’t give a shit about the dudes everyone else in fandom/tumblr/etc is apeshit over, but like. . .I feel like the Tumblr invention of the phrase “mean lesbian” is ultimately couched in very heteropatriarchal stereotypes around lesbians. Because it case you didn’t know, lesbians have typically been represented as extremely unpleasant in media for a long time; positive rep for us is pretty new. The lesbian in media is invariably a man-hating, penis-envying shrill feminist strawman (usually overlapping with the “no-fun feminist who thinks everything is sexist and all men are evil” stock character) or, at best, a laughable object of disgust for her gender-nonconformity, her ugliness, her fatness, her short hair, her non-sexual attire, all the things that make her unattractive to men and therefore both useless and a walking insult to them.  And this animosity towards lesbians, and depictions of us as horrid two-dimensional viragos who are just angry and mean all the time, comes from the patriarchal assumption that not being interested in men means hating them, because, as I’ve noticed for a long time, cis men just can’t fathom DISINTEREST in them, nor can society in general. They can’t IMAGINE that a woman just DOESN’T CARE about them one way or the other, we HAVE to be OBSESSED with them in SOME way, even if that way is hating them. That’s why SO MUCH of the perception of lesbians I encounter from people, or the questions I’ve gotten pertaining to being gay, is seldom focused around asking why I find women attractive, but on asking why I DON’T find men attractive. Because, as women, our sexuality MUST be focused around (cis) men, even if the focus is rejecting them; they can’t just be a non-issue to us. And, of course, that rejection cannot be “I’m just not into bros, bro” but an active seething EVIL HATRED. We must DESPISE them. And we’re BAD for that. We’re MEAN. As is ANY woman who, say, has turned down any man ever, or who has the mildest of issues with even the most egregious sexism, hence why feminists are always depicted as shrieking harpies who flip out over absolutely absurd shit, rather than ever having anything resembling an actual point about a real issue. We’re just MEAN, man! And that makes us easy to dismiss. Along with all the uncomfortable truths we draw attention to. See also: Angry Feminist, Angry Black Woman, etc. Maybe I’m reaching, but much like all the gross stuff that Tumblr has made around tops and bottoms that is just sexism 2.0 (pretty much every stereotype about bottoms is a stereotype about women, it’s just seme and uke all over again) I don’t think that the “mean lesbian” thing came out of nowhere with no basis in anything previous. I think it’s absolutely got sexist af roots, or at least very well could, even if people, including lesbians, are using it affectionately now.  - I once told a friend that Artemis and Athena were my favorite Greek deities as a kid and she said “no one is surprised”

… yeah, yeah that’s fair -  I don’t have Spotify, but here’s a playlist Youtube made for me based on what I listen to most there: Winterborn by The Cruxshadows Rasputin by Turisa Wolves Without Teeth by Of Monsters & Men City of Night by Miracle of Sound King & Lionheart by Of Monsters & Men Still by Alanis Morissette Sophia by The Cruxshadows Nothing I Can Do by Dreams in the Witch House - A Lovecraftian Rock Opera Rammstein vs Lady Gaga - Du Hast vs Telephone mashup All the Myths Are True by Abney Park I Don’t Know How To Love Him from Jesus Christ Superstar Reverent of Rats by Powerwolf Temple of Love by The Sisters of Mercy Blinding by Florence + the Machine Eye To Eye from Disney’s “A Goofy Movie” by Jonathan Young Come With Me Now by Kongos Airship Pirates by Abney Park Like A Prayer metal cover by Jay Smith The Hype by 21 Pilots She Sells Sanctuary by The Cult Plush by Stone Temple Pilots Beast of Gevaudan by Powerwolf The Tale of Cu Chulainn by Miracle of Sound I Like Giants by Kimya Dawson Birdhouse In Your Soul by They Might Be Giants

[draven-imani]

Journal 5 (Part 2)

So. Yeah. Commander Irabeth Tirabade gave me a temporary field promotion. Although she said there wasn’t much of the Raven Corps left to speak of at the moment. Apparently, a certain Golden Boy had commandeered as many people as he could convince to come with him on a mad quest into the Worldwound after the attack and our group fell underground. He has an entire legion following him, which he dubbed the Silver Legion. She said it was likely he’d be back soon for a supply run.

Damn. I always knew Leto would go far. But to rally the troops on his own without any preestablished backing and just…go for it? I don’t know how he does it. We walked the same path and yet somehow he’s always been in a completely different league than me. I don’t envy him, not in the slightest. I’m in awe, more like. It’s like looking at the sun. It’s incomprehensible.

Ah. I wish he were here instead of there, though. He’d know how to handle this whole ‘Acting Captain’ thing. I feel in over my head already. I don’t want a position of power. I don’t want people’s lives in my hands. I only thought I wanted to go up the ranks when I was an idealistic kid with no idea what that meant. Now…the idea of giving the order that gets someone killed sickens me…

But if Commander Tirabade is the one who gives me that responsibility, I don’t think I’ll be able to say no.

I was starting to doubt…a lot, the last couple of days, honestly. Everything about Luna threw things into question. And then we found out Baphomet cultists infiltrated the church. And then Auriel died. And then I first talked to Radiance…and heard their threats. The threats from a holy weapon that sounded like they should have come from a demon. That stung. That shook me.

But then we met Irabeth Tirabade. And even in person she represents everything I have ever strived to be. Both in the sense of a former Raven Corps member who pulled herself out and into a position to actually be of use to the world, but also in the sense of how an Iomedae worshipper should carry themselves. She’s noble and strong and honorable, but she’s not quite so stuck in her ways as Auriel was, she seems to see things the way they are, and have been in the past, and she seems to be willing to admit when things are rotten and need to be fixed. I respect her. A lot. I…don’t want to disappoint her.

Aaaaand that means, if she gives me a responsibility, I have to rise to the task…even if I really really reeeeeeeeally don’t want to.

Commander Tirabade told me to give her a full report of everything that had happened. Which is exactly what I’d been keeping this journal for. So I gave her my report, and had the others chime in where my memory or note taking didn’t serve adequately. Then I showed her Radiance. I didn’t really think about it, because I thought since she was a paladin that Radiance wouldn’t be quite so ‘I’m going to flay you alive’. Or maybe I just wasn’t thinking, because she was Irabeth Tirabade and I’m dumb. That’s more likely. Anyways Radiance started burning her hands, so I quickly took them back.

And I may have admonished them out loud for doing that. To which Radiance basically asked ‘what part of chosen wielder don’t you understand?’ which…fair, but I guess I kind of thought Radiance was the one deciding whether or not to start hurting someone for touching it with how they’d worded it last time. I didn’t think it just happened.

The others were looking at me like I was crazy and asked if I was talking to my sword. So then I had to explain that Radiance is a magic intelligent weapon and also really picky about who wields them.

(And I got a little off track figuring out Radiance’s pronouns here. The answer boiled down to ‘I don’t conform to your mortal view of gender, call me whatever you want’, so I’m sticking with they since it’s neutral. Must be nice being a formless weapon spirit who can just give a copout answer like ‘I don’t conform to your mortal view of gender’. I’d not conform to my mortal view of gender if I could, but I have a flesh prison with all that gender-y stuff that comes with it.)

So then one of them, I forget who, commented about me being the chosen wielder of Radiance. And I think I laughed. I corrected them. No, I wasn’t the chosen wielder. The others pointed out I was wielding them, it sure looked like I was. So I explained what Radiance had already explained to me. That Auriel had been meant to wield them. That I was only holding them now because Auriel didn’t make it this far, and because Auriel’s soul vouched for me.

Commander Tirabade gave her condolences to us about Auriel, and asked that I tell her as much as I could about him later, as someone was going to give a eulogy for all who had been lost in the battle against the demons soon and she would make sure given his heroic sacrifice that he was given the send off he deserved.

Then Anevia rejoined the conversation, having been listening in on the sword talk. She called Irabeth over and asked her about the sword she had lied about selling. Anevia proved even with a sweet voice and a smile to be scarier than the much larger and more fearsome looking commander. Commander Tirabade admitted that she had sold her sword in exchange for an anniversary gift for Anevia. A potion that permanently changes one’s gender.

Aaaaand looking back I really hope the talk about pronouns was not uncomfortable, I was legitimately trying to be polite to the sword, despite Radiance never once extending the same courtesy to me.

Anyways.

By the end the Commander determined that it would be a good idea for us to continue taking out the safehouses, but she had another mission for us as well once that was done. Something big. She told us that another of Deskari’s generals was on her way here—the witch Arelu Vorlesh. We had heard rumors of this from drifters on the streets as well. The crusaders had managed to get information that Deskari’s cult had holed up in Old Kenabres, making a stronghold of a temple to the Inheritor known as the Grey Garrison. There was a piece of the wardstone left still intact, and Arelu was coming to corrupt it. If she was successful, the Commander believed Arelu was going to turn the wardstone into a weapon that would decimate the crusaders on the battlefield.

With that in mind, she had a librarian from the Blackwing come forward with a magical rod. I’m not one for the arcane, but Hiskaria sounded extremely in awe and almost equally disturbed by the implications of the rod, a ‘rod of cancellation’. The important part I gathered was that if Hiskaria used the rod on the wardstone, then it would destroy it.

Melody was hesitant, wondering if there was any way to eventually fix the wardstone and restore the barrier to save the city. Commander Tirabade said no. It had been created hundreds of years ago, when times were less turbulent, and with divine intervention. We had neither the means nor the time, and every moment we left the wardstone intact was a moment Arelu could return to attempt to corrupt it to her own purposes. Better that it was destroyed than in enemy hands.

We agreed. The Commander said that she would not order this strike until we had cleared out all of the safehouses, so that they had nowhere to fall back to, and no reinforcements to call upon, or else the strike would be a suicide mission. But once we had finished ridding the city of their other bases of operations, she would have an army march on the main forces of Deskari, drawing their attention, while our small strike force took the Grey Garrison.

With a plan in place, we decided that today we would at least take down one more safehouse before we rested. I was the only one really in need of any rest, and Commander Tirabade offered that the clerics of the crusades were at our disposal before we left so that we would not have to use our own limited supplies. Once my remaining injuries from those blasted vultures were healed, we set out.

We came upon some looters, who had overturned the caravan of a handful of survivors and were picking through it. We discussed, and decided we didn’t particularly want to kill these guys, just spook them. So Luna pulled up her hood and donned her Butcher persona, then went after the looters, threatening that she would add them to her pile of the dead if they didn’t abandon this cart to her. It worked, and they fled for their lives.

Luna removed her hood and we approached the survivors. They were frightened after that display, but glad to have their supplies back. We pointed them in the direction of Defender’s Heart and gave them the passcode, and told them to let them know we’d sent them, as we’d seen a number of refugees being housed safely there.

After that we continued on our way, until we came upon the Tower of Estrod. From the note we’d gotten off Hosilla, there was a passcode, “I’ve new material for the archives”. Since we knew this, and we knew Hosilla’s face, we formed a plan. Melody was able to use the magic of her scale of Trendalor to disguise herself as Hosilla. I was to pretend to be one of the Baphomet worshippers who was a false Iomedaen. And Luna was merely being a more exaggerated version of herself, using her infamy as the Butcher of Balestreet to her advantage. Hiskaria didn’t want to go inside and be stuck in close quarters, so she remained outdoors on lookout, listening for any sign of things going badly. After some discussion, Melody had handed off Auriel’s scale to Hiskaria, and explained how it worked to her. The scales couldn’t be used together, so Melody needed to hand it off regardless, and it seemed right that since Hiskaria was going to be helping us for the foreseeable future, she should be the one to hold it. And as an archer the levitation ability it granted would be of more use to her than to any of us.

With a plan in mind, the three of us walked into the proverbial lion’s den. Two cultists of Baphomet were lounging about on the bottom floor. Believing they recognized Melody as Hosilla, they let us in, and told us to meet with a man on the upper floor by the name of Faxon. We followed Melody’s lead, and went up the stairs. At the top of the tower, we found a tiefling with a scorpion upon his shoulder. He spoke smugly to ‘Hosilla’, and had a very…slimy feel about him. I got the impression that he and Hosilla were not on good terms, perhaps even that Stauton Vhagn pit them against each other and that’s why he was having Hosilla check up on him, just to rub salt in the wound. Unfortunately, Melody didn’t quite know how far to press, and backed down too soon, after making her ‘report’, agreeing to return downstairs with little bite back. When questioned about what I knew, I did the safe thing and pled ignorance, claiming to merely be Hosilla’s guard and not someone in a position to have information. When asked, Luna said she was just there for the kills, nothing more nothing less.

As Melody went to have us return downstairs, Faxon called Luna back to him. I had a bad feeling, but Luna shrugged it off and said to go on without her. Melody decided that maybe we could take out the cultists downstairs quietly while he had whatever discussion he wanted with her. I agreed, although we never got the chance. When we reached the bottom of the stairs, the sound of violence broke out upstairs, and the two downstairs were alerted that something was amiss. Melody and I decided it would be best for us to guard the stairs and make sure these two couldn’t sneak up on Luna from behind first before going upstairs to try to help her finish with Fenox.

I took care of one of the cultists swiftly, with Radiance spurring me on, the both of us eager to put an end to the evils of these worshippers of the Minotaur. The sounds upstairs began to die down, as Melody took a stab at the other from the stairs with Hosilla’s glaive. He tried to flee. Melody wasn’t going to allow that. She leapt from the stairs, and with far less regard for a glaive that isn’t her family’s sentimental one, she used it to pole-vault at the cultist, landing behind him and swinging around to stab at him once again. Still he was up. He almost made it to the door.

Just in time for Hiskaria to open the door and shoot an arrow in his face.

Somehow by some twisted luck he was still going, but Melody caught up with him once again, and maaaay have decided to show off a little to our new companion as she leapt in the air and skewered the man, finally dead.

All was quiet. I was about to be concerned about what might have happened to Luna, but then Hiskaria told me about the absolutely ridiculously amazing one sided one on one ‘fight’ she’d had with Fenox. As if I should have been worried about Luna. Hiskaria had heard the commotion and used the scale to levitate up so she’d she the last half of the fight. The upper floor didn’t have a roof, so she had been intending to shoot an arrow right into the other tiefling’s skull, but it ended up not being necessary.

See, there was a wall bisecting that room, with a door. He’d shut and locked the door to put it between him and Luna when things started looking bad. Luna had shown yet again just how little walls meant to the Butcher of Balestreet when she used the glaive she’d been holding holding for show as a means to pull herself up and over, then came down on Fenox with her axe. The Butcher one, Baphomet zero.

We met with her upstairs, where we found a shrine to Baphomet and a minotaur shaped object on the wall that was causing the room to be desecrated by its mere presence. There was also a treasure chest, so we decided that while the others went through the loot, I was going to take Radiance and have a bit of fun.

It took some time, that minotaur head was damned sturdy. But when it did break, Radiance’s voice echoed through the room. It wasn’t just me that heard it that time, but everyone. Their voice faded after only a moment. The others seemed a little shaken by that. I don’t really blame them. Radiance is…a lot. They’ve gone back to just being in my head now, which is probably for the best. Them quieting down entirely would probably be better, but I’m not lucky enough to have a normal holy sword that doesn’t demand the blood of demons and cultists as we fight. Ah, well. At least we agree on who our enemies are.

The chest had holy symbols and the favored weapons of multiple faiths, pointing towards the cult’s penchant for infiltration. We decided we would return them to the clerics at Defender’s Heart. Looking back I kind of wish I’d asked if they’d be okay with me keeping one. My wooden holy symbol’s seen a lot of use, and isn’t exactly the sturdiest material. Silver to match Leto’s wouldn’t have hurt. Ah, well. Hindsight and all that.

We were feeling really good after how well that went. We’d been planning on calling it a day after the tower, but since we’d used virtually none of our resources we agreed that unless we ran into particularly nasty trouble on the road we should try to clear out Topaz Solutions, report back to the Commander, and prepare to storm the Grey Garrison tomorrow.

Topaz Solutions was quite a bit farther than the tower had been from Defender’s Heart. Which meant more time for attacks from demons or other things lurking about.

First we were attack by two barbed creatures which made a terrible howling noise. Their barbs were painful when we got too close, but we cleared them out quickly enough with little trouble to speak of. No one ended up with any of the barbs stuck in them, which was a blessing. That could have proven difficult.

Then…we came to Balestreet. The demons had left the street as much a gory horror scene as one might have expected of Luna’s namesake. Here, two cultists of Baphomet tried to ambush us. Big mistake. Luna decided she was eager to make true to her nickname, and took her axe to them. They didn’t go down.

Then two arrows went straight through them, ice burst from one’s injuries, and both fell dead on the road. Hiskaria looked a bit sheepish, asking Luna if she shouldn’t have done that, since Balestreet was supposed to be Luna’s thing. Luna shrugged it off, saying it worked either way.

Remind me not to get on the bad side of the ladies in our group, they can cut quite the fearsome characters.

With that we were on our way, the rest of the walk to Topaz Solutions uneventful. The apothecary was being looted by a couple of thugs when we arrived. Luna decided to do her thing and scared them off with a few threats from the Butcher. Then we started looking around. The looters had taken anything of value, but Luna after some poking around found some ‘really nice door technology’, and opened a secret passage that led into a hidden basement. Luna and Melody snuck down first.

After a minute of waiting, Hiskaria and I heard Luna and Melody call us down, saying there was a strange mechanical doll and an image on the wall they couldn’t identify. I went down first. As Melody stepped forward to let me in, the minotaur head on the wall began to speak. It taunted us, saying it hoped we were Iomedaens so that this surprise from Baphomet wouldn’t go to waste. Then the doll began moving, and smashed a bottle, releasing a small plant creature.

There was also some kind of…gas I think? Something was in the chamber after that which was causing us various issues. Melody and I both started finding it hard to breath for instance—not so much that we were suffocating, but enough that we were wheezing and likely would have been unable to easily move stealthily.

Worse was that plant. It was in a thick patch of vines that it could move through with ease but which we struggles in. It screamed in such a way that it caused both Melody and Hiskaria to become nauseous, forcing them to flee upstairs to safety and leaving me and Luna to deal with it by ourselves. And it was small and tricky, dodging around many of our attacks in the most frustrating manner. Luna did finally squash the blasted thing, and I went over to the minotaur head and broke whatever the device was that was releasing gas into the room.

Then we searched the room and found a chest with a mocking note claiming we deserved a reward for besting the trap. Within were a number of stolen holy symbols. Luna stopped us from taking them, noting that they were covered in a contact poison.

I have decided I rather dislike this Igon Topaz, and do hope he survived the attack on the city. If only so that I may someday bring judgement upon him myself.

With all three safehouses cleared out, we’ve returned to Defender’s Heart for the night. We reported back to the Commander, and we spent some time unwinding and preparing for tomorrow. There are some merchants set up so we were able to get some supplies. And, more importantly, we got some drinks.

And even more importantly, Leto’s back.

He showed up while we were making preparations, all smiles and charm as always. He thought I’d died in a pit, I thought he’d been killed by demons, same old same old.

He looked amazing. He’s been doing well for himself. He really was the picture of a paladin in that silver armor riding up on a holy steed. Although I guess to him I must have looked maybe a little impressive with the holy sword Radiance at my side. Ah, if only he could have a conversation with them, he’d quit being impressed real quick.

Leto played up his knight in shining armor role well, flirted with Hiskaria even though she’s twice his age and a convicted murderer, and got on well with Melody. He…did not get on well with Luna. He tried, certainly, at first, but then she threw some misplaced insults about him being Raven Corps which I corrected, and then she brought up how all the reports of her being a murderer are vastly exaggerated by the Raven Corps and…it was just all around awkward, I think.

So then he introduced us to his horse, Charles, instead. He got a kick out of the fact he’d given his holy mount such a mundane name instead of something more heroic like—

Hold up. Charles.

Charlie.

Chalie Horse.

…that blasted tiefling, I’m going to wring his neck next time I see him.

I can’t decide if I’m mad about the pun, mad I didn’t catch it when we were talking about it, or mad that I didn’t think of it first.

Named his holy steed a pun, the nerve of that man...I wonder if anyone else has caught on. Commander of the Silver Legion, Leto Jules, the tiefling so charismatic he managed to sway 50,000 people to his banner…named his holy steed Charlie Horse. Inheritor help me I don’t know what to do with him.

Or how to outdo that.

Which is frustrating.

Oh well. What’re you going to do? Some days you find out your brother is not just still alive but now leading a legion on the back of a horse named Charlie and you just roll with it.

I’m glad he’s okay.

His Silver Legion is going to be joining the fight against the main forces tomorrow while our strike force goes into the Grey Garrison. So that’s more for me to worry about. But Leto’s always been a lucky bastard unlike me. He’ll be fine.

After the fact Melody, Hiskaria, and Luna decided it was really important to whisper amongst themselves and to send me away. So apparently it’s rumor time again. Yay. I’m fairly certain with them it would be nothing bad…but I can’t fathom what they could have possibly been whispering about. I suppose if they think Leto and I are related by blood it could have been about that, if they think I share his demonic bloodline…but Hiskaria is a tiefling as well, I see little reason why they would need to be secretive about it if that were the case. And quite frankly Leto and I don’t look alike. At all. Even if he weren’t golden, we don’t share even close to the same features. So I don’t think we could be mistaken for blood relatives.

I don’t know, and there’s really no use in speculating. It’s growing late, and we have a temple to siege in the morning.

[marshmallowprotection]

Question: what do you think it's the RFA's characters (+Rika,V,Saeran) gender and sexuality? Since we're in the pride month

I’ve shared my HC a few times before and I have my feelings on the matter. 

As a whole, I tend to say that the RFA will love the MC no matter who they are or how they identify, so lemme just slap that out there first because I’ve gotten a bit of hate in the past about this sort of thing and I sincerely don’t want a repeat of that situation. I have no time for bullshit and no energy for it. It mostly entails a lot of transphobia and acephobia so, uh, terfs, transphobes, acephobes, etc do not interact with me. 

I read Yoosung as Trans and Bi. He’s constantly comparing himself to the other male members of the RFA with envy and sometimes, it reads to me as a puppy crush and I love when Zen and Yoosung interact because they’re both so supportive to each other and it’s obvious that Yoosung admires him. He feels like he’s not as much of a man as the others, constantly feeling like he’s not smart, strong, or appealing as the others. He’s trying to sort out his feelings for boys but he gets stuck between, do I want to be with him, or do I want to be him? The answer is both, he learns. 

I read Zen as Pan. He’s open to love from all walks of life and he feels the Pan label encapsulates his emotional experience in a way that Bi doesn’t. Bi and Pan are interchangeable labels in the same realm, Bi being the attraction to two or more genders, Pan simply saying attraction without any regard to gender. Zen appreciates an aesthetically pleasing person. He loves his MC no matter who they are, and this just felt right to him. As long as you love him for who he is and not just what he looks like, he’s down for it. 

I read Jaehee is a Lesbian, obviously. She’s clearly had an internal struggle with her emotions for a long time. She hasn’t allowed herself to feel anything toward anyone before and she has only assumed that she likes boys because that is what society says that she is supposed to do. She hasn’t ever stopped to think that she felt otherwise, not until her route’s MC comes along and she starts to feel something strongly that she hasn’t felt before. She’s got a lot to sort out, as her instant thought is she wants to be friends forever, but it takes her time to realize that THEY CAN BE MORE THAN THAT AND THAT’S WHAT SHE WANTS. 

I read Seven is NB/Genderfluid, as well as Bi. Seven is a confirmed Bisexual, so, there’s no HC about it. That’s his sexuality guys, point-blank. He loves the MC no matter what and that’s simply that. As far as the other label, Seven loves to dress up, and he loves to fluctuate between dressing up as a woman and dressing up as himself. It may have started back in the agency for missions, but he quickly realized that wearing a dress and makeup and receiving female pronouns every now and again... felt right. So, he can teeter between what feels right to him, but unless he tells you otherwise, he’s okay with you using male pronouns. 

I read Jumin as Ace. Oh, boy, I’ve talked about this one a lot and some people were not kind to me for it, but I stand my ground. He’s not sex-repulsed, but he doesn’t really feel any sexual pull at all. He spent much of his young life being sexually-harrassed by people, from a very young age. His interest in love was already pretty much void, but the notion that people wanted him simply for sex not only disgusted him but it made him feel like an outsider because he did not experience those feelings. Love for him is talking all night in front of a fire, and if his MC wishes to take things more physical, he’s not averse to it but it would have to be something talked about from both ends.

I read Jihyun as Demi. He is a very closed off guy. He’s someone that keeps his heart inside of him and is wary of getting close to others that he doesn’t already have in his life. It took some time for him to feel attached to Rika, and it would also take time for him to become attached to his MC. He simply does not fall for someone fast and hard, he needs time even then, he struggles to understand if what he is feeling is love or just the strong bond of a cherished friendship. It is a bit harder for him because of his internalized guilt, and inability to be selfish. 

I also, read Saeran/Ray as Demi. Romance for him is sort of a mixed bag, and while he feels strongly for others, it isn’t until he feels like he’s come to know that person that he feels that he’s in love with them. He can feel the intense feelings of infatuation all day and strain to understand why he feels such a pull to another person but it is not a sexual thing for him until much time has passed. He loves his MC, but it would take a lot of time and trust for him to feel ready and okay with sexual feelings. He’s got a lot of his own guilt and shame when it comes to being selfish, so it may take him even longer to realize that he wants to take things any further with his MC. He wants to hold their hand and be with them, but sex never crossed his mind. 

Rika is... Honestly, I’d have to really think about Rika. 

[haledamage]

OC Questionnaire

I was tagged by @actualanxiousswampwitch and not so much tagged as challenged by @queen-scribbles​ :P 

I am tagging/challenging you both back if you have more OCs you want to talk about, plus anyone else who has an OC you want to talk about! really, I want to know about your muses, please share them with me <3

I decided to go with Lexi from Mind Blind because she’s currently my most vocal muse, as well as Ari because I realized I’ve never done one of these for her? not sure how that happened

Lexi Wiseman

GENERAL

name: Alexandria Jane Wiseman

alias(es): Lexi, Lex, Button, Cadet Wiseman

gender: cis female

age: 20

place of birth: Chicago, Illinois

spoken languages: English, sarcasm, probably some coding language? took Spanish and German in high school, but really only remembers how to count to ten and ask where the library is

sexual orientation: bi bi bi

occupation: student at Unity’s Aeon Academy

APPEARANCE

eye colour: hazel

hair colour: brown

height: 5′8”

scars: not any major ones? She scars really easy, so even little things like paper cuts leave a scar, but except for things like that and old scars from scraped knees and elbows as a kid, Lexi doesn’t really have any scars worth mentioning. (or as Lex would say, “my scars are all mental ;)”)

burns: not really many burn scars either. a small and perfectly circular one on the inside of her right ring finger (accidentally bumped into the lit end of a cigarette), a faded line on her right calf from grazing the exhaust pipe of a motorcycle, but that’s really it

overweight: No

underweight: No

FAVOURITE

colour: green, especially darker ones like hunter green or forest green

music genre: loves music, all kinds. most of the covers she does are older pop songs, the songs that have made it into the collective consciousness, but she will listen to or sing anything :)

movie genre: action. loves a superhero movie and not afraid to admit it.

tv show: don’t think she’s much of a tv person. more likely listens to podcasts or watches twitch streams/youtube shows. I feel like she’d be a big Buzzfeed Unsolved fan. occasionally enjoys a cooking competition show like Chopped or Iron Chef, something you can enjoy without having to commit to it. Watches them with Nick because his commentary is the best part.

pastime: music (plays guitar and piano/keyboard, and knows her way around a sampler/MIDI controller), video games (especially fps, co-op or team-based online games preferred)

food: anything Nick cooks, but especially cinnamon pumpkin cookies

drink: cherry coke, sweet iced tea, iced white mocha

book: she’s not a really big reader (not that she doesn’t enjoy it, she just has other ways she’d rather spend her time), but she’ll read just about anything on the occasion she has time to. adventure, romance, mystery, poetry, whatever. really enjoys sci-fi especially, and comic books!

HAVE THEY

passed university: she didn’t go to college per se, since Aeon isn’t technically a college so much as a very particular and multi-year job training course, but she took a few courses at the local community college. Computer programming, music theory, whatever struck her fancy. Probably found something weird that she’ll never need in real life just for the hell of it.

had sex: no

had sex in public: no

gotten pregnant: no

kissed a boy: yes

kissed a girl: yes

gotten tattoos: no, but she wants one. eventually. once she settles on a design

had a broken heart: sure, in lots of different ways. the situation with her mom could certainly be considered heart-breaking...

been in love: she would deny it if you asked her, but yes. Very yes.

stayed up for longer than 24 hours: sure, yeah, why not? sleep is overrated anyway

ARE THEY

a virgin: yes. look, when you live with your brother who is a mind-reader and you have literally no way to stop loudly projecting your thoughts, sex is a tricky and awkward situation. better to just avoid it until someone comes along that’s worth it.

a cuddler: yes, very much so. Maybe a little touch-starved, despite Nick and Sally’s efforts. Someone please give her a hug.

a kisser: sometimes

scared easily: startles easily, but doesn’t actually frighten easily

jealous easily: not really. envy, on the other hand...

trustworthy: yes, but she’ll be the first to tell you not to tell her any secrets. She can’t promise what people can hear from her thoughts

dominant: not really. Can be assertive, but prefers to kind of go with the flow

submissive: not really submissive either, though maybe leans more toward it than toward dominant

in love: with her brother’s best friend. Has been for years now, expects she will be for the foreseeable future. She accepts that she will spend her life pining from afar. It’s not like Gray could ever feel the same, right?

single: yep

RANDOM QUESTIONS

have they harmed themselves: nope

thought of suicide: I don’t think so

attempted suicide: no

Wanted to kill someone: no

rode a horse: nope

have / had a job: her situation makes it a little difficult to work normal jobs. I would imagine she makes money through patreon with her music, and she will eventually have a job at Unity as a MIV, once she finishes at Aeon

have any fears: loss of control (again), not being good enough, abandonment, rejection (specifically being rejected for things she can’t change; she’s fine if people don’t like her for her personality, some people just have bad taste)

FAMILY

sibling(s): older brother Nick, relationship status: besties against all odds

Parents: John and Hope Wiseman, relationship status: fucking complicated

children: none, she is baby

pets: none

---

Aurienne the Sparrow

GENERAL

name: Aurienne the Sparrow. She had a last name once, but she doesn’t remember it.

alias(es): Ari, Little Bird, The Sparrow Queen

gender: nonbinary female/demigirl

age: 23

place of birth: Andoran, she assumes. It’s the first place she remembers living, at the very least.

spoken languages: Common, Elvish, a little Celestial thanks to her sister

sexual orientation: bisexual

occupation: Queen of the Stolen Lands, somehow

APPEARANCE

eye colour: light gray

hair colour: black

height: 5′10”

scars: a thin but deep and ragged scar across her throat that she normally keeps covered by a scarf or choker or high collar; arrow puncture in her left shoulder; long line on her inner right thigh from a greatsword that almost cut her leg off entirely; a few other minor ones

burns: a few on her fingertips from accidents with her flaming crossbow

overweight: No

underweight: No

FAVOURITE

colour: gold

music genre: punk and all its subgenres :)

movie genre: she loves a musical, all musicals

tv show: dramas and monster of the week shows. wants a tv show that’ll make her cry

pastime: music (when she’s feeling confident enough to give it a try again, which is… a work in progress), reading, silly but harmless pranks. Loves to meditate a surprising amount, just sit in silent contemplation.

food: samosas, lemon macarons

drink: matcha latte with white chocolate syrup

book: has a deep and unending love of poetry

HAVE THEY

passed university: nope, didn’t go to school

had sex: yes

had sex in public: …...perhaps

gotten pregnant: nope

kissed a boy: yes

kissed a girl: yes

gotten tattoos: yes, seven sparrows down her spine. recently, the one on the back of her neck got a tiny little crown over its head :)

had a broken heart: yes

been in love: yes

stayed up for longer than 24 hours: yes, but rarely

ARE THEY

a virgin: nope

a cuddler: sort of? I think she wants to be, but is scared to let herself be vulnerable like that. Will happily cuddle with anyone who initiates, though

a kisser: not really, unless she’s in a mood

scared easily: yes, but hides it well

jealous easily: nope

trustworthy: very

dominant: not really. Prefers to let others take the reins (probably not the best trait for a queen, but as she is quick to tell people, being in charge was never her idea)

submissive: most of the time. Probably a big part of why she and Tristian took so long to get together...

in love: yes, with a literal angel

single: she’s not sure??? like, they haven’t really made anything official yet, but no one would ever look at the two of them together and not think they’re a couple. they should probably have a talk about that soon

RANDOM QUESTIONS

have they harmed themselves: no

thought of suicide: yes

attempted suicide: no

Wanted to kill someone: yes

rode a horse: yes

have / had a job: former mercenary/adventurer, former baroness, currently queen of the Stolen Lands? She’s still not entirely sure how that happened

have any fears: helplessness, losing those she loves, being silenced (again)

FAMILY

sibling(s): twin sister, Auriel the Dove

parents: both deceased (I should probably name them at some point…)

children: none. Maybe someday...

pets: an owlcat named Headchomper, a red panda named Ember, an orange tabby cat named Tiger, a giant black wolf named Baron who is technically her sister’s animal companion and also technically her nephew

[shitty-tf2-headcanons]

The Girl You Met In New York (Yana x Reader!)

     (This is the first x Reader I’ve ever written, but I hope this meets your expectations, Percy!! I just saw “Yana” and immediately wrote something for her- and the reader is gender neutral, so everybody can enjoy it!!)

     On the streets of the Big Apple, you wandered aimlessly, feet dragging through puddles and your clothes becoming drenched. It seemed like the rain would never let up. And neither would the heavy shroud of gray hanging over your head, both figuratively and literally. Pulling the flaps of your thick, rain-muddled jacket, you looked across the street to find a glowing, warm light. It was coming from the little cafe, only a short ways away… And you had some cash on you. Even if you were better off at home, warming up completely… Something about that place compelled you to come closer. 

  You crossed the street, cars still whizzing past even in the damp, dark weather, tires skidding past and nearly drenching you once again. 

  Quickly, you ran into the cafe, suddenly filled with a sense of… safety… that you couldn’t have gotten anywhere else. Fairy lights were strung about the oak walls, and every table had a small candle on it along with a single flower in a vase; each a different kind. Water dripped onto the rug, and you shivered, looking to find an open seat, which wasn’t a very difficult task. 

  Even though every other seat was open, you sat in the very corner, away from the windows; and away from the world. Peeling your coat off, you hang it onto your chair, wiping the droplets of water on your nose and eyebrows away before leaning forward with a sigh, head in your hands.

  “Hello. What will you be ordering today?” You jumped at the sudden voice, but looked up to find that it was just a young waitress, curiously looking you up and down. 

  You forced a small, albeit nervous looking smile, placing your order and watching the young woman walk away. 

  What were you going to do…? Nothing bad in particular was happening. You were only taking a walk, after all- but that was when the clouds started to form, and the rain began… And suddenly, you felt… sad. There was no poetry about it. The only thing that registered was sad. 

  How would you get home? You’d have to either wait out the storm, or walk through it and risk getting a cold, and… neither of those options seemed very pleasing. Even sitting in the warmth of the cafe, with the aroma of fresh coffee beans and sweetened pastries, your mind was set on making you miserable. You set your head down on the table and closed your eyes, hoping you’d drift into a better dream, when-

  “Why so sad?” A soft, feminine voice asked you, and your head quickly shot back up. 

  At first, you thought it was the waitress just being polite- but when you gazed up at the owner of the voice, you found a young woman staring down at you, a look of concern in her baby blue eyes. 

  She was a blonde with a round, chubby face, and an even softer, round body to match it. 

You rapidly shook your head, faking another smile. 

  “Ah- Er… I’m just having a bad day, is all. You don’t have to worry.”

  She gave you a bit of a “I know you’re lying” look, and you cleared your throat nervously. You expected her to just leave you be, but the woman simply pulled up a chair, face softening into something indescribable, but… comforting. You barely knew her- Well, you didn’t know her at all- but her bright yellow raincoat and the woolly, fluffy looking hat she wore made the apprehension melt away.

  “Heh… Um, sorry for bothering you, miss.” You offered, and she gently shook her head. 

  “There is no need! You just looked… So sad. Very pathetic. I had to come see what was wrong!” The woman exclaimed, in an accent you couldn’t exactly place, but sounded very close to Russian. You let out a stifled chuckle, shaking your head. 

  “Pathetic’s one word for it.”  You muttered, and she immediately threw her hands up, eyes wide. 

  “No, no- Not in bad way! I didn’t mean to insult! You just looked… Very sad. Not pathetic. Just sad.” The blonde woman quickly assured you, and you couldn’t help but giggle at how flustered she had gotten. When you looked up at her, you could see a hint of pink on her pale face, and smiled, hands folded politely on the table. 

  “No, I get it. I did look kind of pathetic, yeah?” You stated calmly, with a bit of a laugh, and the waitress finally came by with your order. You eagerly grabbed at your cup of coffee, itching to get something warm into your system, when the woman, who was once looking around the cafe with a bored expression, jumped up, nearly knocking your cup over.

  “-Is that a cappuccino?! With the pretty moloko… milk designs!  I’ve always wanted to try one! I see the people of New York drinking them all the time, but I never think to actually get one…” She cheered excitedly, smiling sheepishly. Despite the darkness outside, and the dim lights within, her smile seemed to envy even the sun, making your heart tighten in your chest and your face grow warmer. 

  “Yeah! I haven’t touched mine yet, so you can have it…” You trailed, realizing that you didn’t know her name- and she grinned at you, snatching the mug from your hands before you could even finish. 

  “Yana!” She told you, nearly chugging the piping hot coffee in one gulp. Yana set the cup down after only two giant sips, letting out a deep, contented sigh. You suddenly didn’t care about the coffee anymore. Or being warm. Her smile, the innocence and joy in her eyes when she looked at you, the milk mustache at the edge of her lips… 

  “Yana? …I’ve never heard of that name before. It’s… Beautiful.” You stammered, breathless, and the woman tilted her head to the side, giving you a hearty laugh filled with all the warmth and softness in the world. 

  “Thank you! It is name from my mother!” Yana exclaimed, and you exhaled dreamily. 

  Yana. You thought of no other name than hers, and no other name came to mind when you tried. Everything about her was so… adorable. And nothing else had ever made your heart blossom like this. Especially not on a rainy, gloomy day. 

  Your thoughts went on like this, until you saw Yana stand up out of the corner of your eye and quickly shot up with her. 

  “W- Wait! Will I get to see you again, Yana?” You asked frantically, and she giggled, putting a hand to her chin, as if deep in thought. 

  “Hmm… I like you, person from Cafe. …I will come here again tomorrow! You will get me another cappuccino!” She cheered, and the last part sounded more like a command than a request, but you nodded anyways. It all felt like a dream… And if it was, you didn’t want to wake up!

   Waving goodbye to her as she left, you watched Yana step out into the real world again, which was gloomy and dark- not befitting for someone as bright and sunny as her. 

  But you would see her again tomorrow, and hopefully, you’d learn more about her…

  The Girl You Met In New York.

ANDASJDNJASND BRO I FUCKING LOVE THIS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

THIS! THIS IS WHAT I WANT! I WANT MORE OF THIS WHOLESOME YANA CONTENT CUZ HOLY FUCK-

[thedarknesssings]

MEET THE CHARACTER: Edanar Sinnoraint

► Name ➔   “Is this pleasure or business?  And do I care if I know you in the morning?”

► Are you single ➔ “Happily.”

► Are you happy ➔   “Did I not just say so?”

► Are you angry? ➔   “You’ll know without a doubt if I am.”

► Are your parents still married ➔  “Yes, they are.”

NINE FACTS

► Birth Place ➔  “North Shroud.”

► Hair Color ➔  “Dark purple and black.”

► Eye Color ➔ “Ice blue.”

► Birthday ➔ “My birth date is the 21st Sun of the Third Umbral Moon.”  (AKA: June 20th)

► Mood ➔  “These are rather vague questions to a degree.  In general or right now?  There is a difference.  Currently I am in a far more patient mood than I perhaps should be.”

► Gender ➔ “Quite male.”

► Summer or winter ➔ “I prefer early winter, where fall has faded into the cooler nights yet the fog is still thick on the rivers.”

► Morning or afternoon ➔ “I’ll claim mornings.  The world holds a peculiar quiet to it when the sun begins to glow on the horizon.  Like we collectively hold our breath to await that first glimpse of gold.  I am very fond of gold.”

EIGHT THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE

► Are you in love ➔ “Fuck no.”

► Do you believe in love at first sight ➔ “Not in the least.  I believe in lust at first sight and lust is so simple to rid oneself of, isn’t it?”

► Who ended your last relationship ➔ “How pathetic of you to assume I’d be foolish enough to engage in something so permanent.  I end them.  Every morning I leave or when they cease to serve a purpose.”

► Have you ever broken someone’s heart ➔  “Likely.  I’ve never looked back to find out.”

► Are you afraid of commitments ➔ “No.  I know when to make them and which to make.  Those I’ve made serve a purpose.  One that will better my position in life.”  

► Have you hugged someone within the last week? ➔ “My brother.”

► Have you ever had a secret admirer ➔ “Not to my knowledge, but I suppose if they are secret I’d be the last to know.”

► Have you ever broken your own heart? ➔ “Don’t we all at some point? Pain makes the best building blocks.”

SIX CHOICES

► Love or lust ➔ “Lust.”

► Lemonade or iced tea ➔ “Lemonade.” 

► Cats or Dogs ➔ “Cats.” 

► A few best friends or many regular friends ➔ “Many regular friends.”

► Wild night out or romantic night in ➔ “Wild night out.”

► Day or night ➔ “Night.” 

FIVE HAVE YOU EVERS

► Been caught sneaking out ➔ “Snuck out?  Yes.  Got caught?  No.”

► Fallen down/up the stairs ➔ “Down them.  Shae’s fault.  He was extremely drunk and is somewhat larger than I am.  I was helping him out of an establishment, and he teetered a bit too far forward.  We both went down.”

► Wanted something/someone so badly it hurt? ➔ “Yes.”

► Wanted to disappear ➔ “No.  Afraid the world is stuck with the Sinnoraints a while longer.” 

FOUR PREFERENCES

► Smile or eyes ➔ “Eyes.” 

► Shorter or Taller ➔ “I’m not that particular.  Either.”

► Intelligence or Attraction ➔  “I’ll pick something attractive on my arm.  Intelligent people tend to think I owe them something at the end of the night.” 

► Hook-up or Relationship ➔ “Hook-up.”

FAMILY

► Do you and your family get along ➔ “We do.  My father and I are close.  My brother is my best friend.  Mother has become more distant as the dementia has taken hold.  We were close when I was younger.” 

► Would you say you have a “messed up life” ➔ “I suppose in some eyes I may.  I don’t think so personally.”

► Have you ever ran away from home ➔ “When I was 9, my father moved us to Ul’duh.  I missed the Shroud so much I tried to go back on my own.  I got lost on the way, of course, and gave up the idea by the time I found a town.  I don’t think I even made it that far.”

► Have you ever gotten kicked out ➔ “No. We have parts to play.  Father’s plan has always included my taking his place eventually.”

FRIENDS

► Do you secretly hate one of your friends ➔ “Ahh, do we not all secretly have something we dislike about our friends?  Something to envy, some incessant habit?  And then there are -friends-.  The ones we keep nearby to keep an eye on or to serve a use. I can’t say I care much for them.” 

► Do you consider all of your friends good friends ➔ “Not at all.  I count very few as good friends.  Friends can just as easily hold a dagger to your throat as anyone else might.  A fool trusts implicitly.  I try to avoid being the fool.”  

► Who is your best friend ➔ “Shaelith, my brother.” 

► Who knows everything about you ➔ “Besides me?  I’d say Shae is a close second, but even then, there are things he doesn’t know.”

Tagged by:  @aigiarnqestir-ffxiv  (Thank you for the tag!)

Tagging: @gorgagne-viperidae ; @houserosaire ; @rinrin-rinalys ; @louvel-roche ; @auburn-stallion  and anyone else that wants to!

[voidsentprinces]

Character Interview II: Luxuria Asmodeus Sang, Voidsent Prince of Lust

► Name ➔  “Alias? Nikuyoku Sanguinius. True name? Don’t recall. Given name? Luxuria Asmodeus Sang.”

► Are you single ➔ “What, a straightforward question, I am quite so.”

► Are you happy ➔  “A strange question, I am content.”

► Are you angry? ➔   “A great whirlwind of Hellfire, storms within me. But, I am not angry. I am Lust.”  

► Are your parents still married ➔  “I have no memory of parents. Not even a vague concept. So, I have no way of answering. My apologizes.”

NINE FACTS

► Birth Place ➔ “Within the Realm of Tartarian on the Streets of what was once, Tindress.”

► Hair Color ➔  “Charcoal gray, ash white.”

► Eye Color ➔ “My injured eye is a blind white, my good eye? Passion Red.”

► Birthday ➔  “My apologizes, there was no calendar present for my birth. And without proper parental force around. I will never know.”

► Mood ➔   “I am content, thank you.”

► Gender ➔  “Male...I think?”

► Summer or winter ➔ “Winter, there is something welcoming about the cold and frigid temperature. Though I still radiate like a wandering star, it brings out the finest things in life. Fireplace conversation, layers of blankets, and of course, warm spirites.”

► Morning or afternoon ➔ “Afternoon, I find Morning people to be strange phenomenon.” He chuckled lightly.

EIGHT THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE

► Are you in love ➔ “No.”

► Do you believe in love at first sight ➔ “I believe in affection at first sight, but love requires effort. It requires time and understanding from all sides. I believe anyone can be sent into a frenzy, a longing need, a lust for touch and attention. Those who are starved of all this are as eager to jump at the first step. Aye, but love at first sight? I’m afraid not. I am sure, they believe it so, they build an idea of a being at first sight in their head. It is what comes after, the seconds, the minutes, the hours, the days, weeks, months, years, decades, centuries, after seeing that being. That is when love either settles or bitterness entrenches.”

► Who ended your last relationship ➔ Smiled politely, “I haven’t had the honor of a relationship.”

► Have you ever broken someone’s heart ➔  "Oh, mon cher. I am the embodiment and source of Lust. I am sure, I have broken plenty of hearts in my time.” He chuckled lightly.

► Are you afraid of commitments ➔ “No.”

► Have you hugged someone within the last week? ➔ “Do not believe I have. I’ve spent this last week, chipping away at some crystal in Azys Lla. Not a appropriate area for hugging.”

► Have you ever had a secret admirer ➔ “Once more, I am Lust. I am sure, I have had plenty of secret admirers. But, one can never be too sure. Thats the secret part.” He winked.

► Have you ever broken your own heart? ➔ Took a sip of his Anisette, “Every day.”

SIX CHOICES

► Love or lust ➔ “Lust.”

► Lemonade or iced tea ➔ “Nothing quite like the tart and sweet of lemonade.”

► Cats or Dogs ➔ “Both are good animals in my opinion. If you’re planning for a baby, dogs. If you’re planning for a teenager, cats.” He laughed.

► A few best friends or many regular friends ➔ “My aspect drives me for many, but I prefer a few.”

► Wild night out or romantic night in ➔ “No greater time than the Admiral over my shoulder! As we traverse the taverns of the land. Drinking ourselves into a stupor and flirting with life and death...well maybe not Death, but you get the point.” He rose his glass.

► Day or night ➔ “Nights, its when the taverns open.”

FIVE HAVE YOU EVERS

► Been caught sneaking out ➔ “I don’t think anyone has. Or the Admiral would notice me going to get Namazu more often.”

► Fallen down/up the stairs ➔ “Fallen down stairs, nothing quite like tripping after seeing a beautiful person.”

► Wanted something/someone so badly it hurt? ➔ “Every day.” He said grimly.

► Wanted to disappear ➔ “No, I do not believe I have. I must persist to find her again.”

FOUR PREFERENCES

► Smile or eyes ➔ “Eyes are the window to the soul, mon cher! The way they light up when they experience wonder. Steel themselves when anger and jealousy set in. Roll at climax, blur are slumber, and of course dialate when attracted.”

► Shorter or Taller ➔ “Well, as ah...how you say, Viera? Nearly everyone but, “kin”, Elezen, and Roegadyn are shorter than I.”

► Intelligence or Attraction ➔  “I naturally grant attraction,” He sighed, “So intelleigence every time.”

► Hook-up or Relationship ➔ “Nothing wrong with a hook up.”

FAMILY

► Do you and your family get along ➔  “Previously, I believe we did. When our family consisted just of me and her. But, my current family now? I haven’t talked to Envy, Gluttony, Wrath, or Sloth in sometime. Twelve know where Pride is and Greed, I talk to often. But, get along with them? It varies.”

► Would you say you have a “messed up life” ➔ “Set ablaze and turned into a Voidsent Prince, losing memories of my past except vague details? I do believe that counts as a Messed Up Life, aye.”

► Have you ever ran away from home ➔ “Nay.”

► Have you ever gotten kicked out ➔ “Nay.”

FRIENDS

► Do you secretly hate one of your friends ➔ “No, I do not particularly abhor anyone.”

► Do you consider all of your friends good friends ➔ “Good enough to piledrive a Namazu from the Sea of Clouds into Coerthas below, aye!”

► Who is your best friend ➔ “I believe, the Admiral is a good friend. Best? We will see!”

►Who knows everything about you ➔ “Genixma.” He sighed, “But, he is cryptic as ever.”

Tagged by: @ventrue-antitribu​ @ainarosewood​

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #216

“cocaine in a crucifix, say your prayers, take your licks.”

How much money is in your wallet right now? Not a lot. Maybe like $10. What’s the last thing you purchased from the store? Me myself? No idea. Have you ever seen the movie Mean Girls? If so, did you think it was funny? Yeah, it's a nice movie. What do you usually get on your sub at Subway? Ham, American cheese, bacon, banana peppers, pickles, and Chipotle sauce. I think that's it. Is your bed made right now? Do you usually make your bed, or does someone make it for you? I'm in my bed. I always am. Have you ever had a crush of one of your friends’ brothers/sisters? No. Do you take naps often? I take one most days. Are you an only child? If not, do you get annoyed by your siblings a lot? No, and they don't annoy me, but then again, I live with none of them. What’s your favorite Disney movie? The Lion King. Does it take you a while to fall asleep? Ugh. Too long. Do you watch TV before you go to sleep? No. Do you listen to music every day? It's very rare I don't. If you could have ANYTHING in the world right now, what would it be? To be satisfied with where I am in life. Do you still watch Spongebob Squarepants? No. I don't not enjoy it, you know I just don't watch television. What kind of bottled water do you drink? Mom buys big jugs of some Great Value-esque or whatever brand. Do you collect stuff someone else would consider junk? If so, then what? No. What's the most your electricity bill has ever reached? Idk, I don't pay it. How much was your tax refund this year or did you pay? N/A How are the kids doing? I don't have any. Do you see a bright light at the end of your tunnel? Just being realistic, not deliberately depressing or anything, I don't know. I could have a very dull and unsuccessful life or a thriving and happy one. What's the most you’ve ever lost gambling? Don't gamble. Have you ever waited in line overnight for something? No. How many concerts have you attended? One. Do you think having an expensive phone is a good investment? To a certain high price, no. So long you can call and text easily and reliably, I don't find it necessary to buy a $500 or whatever phone. Any tattoos? How many do you need or want to cover up? I have six. I'm getting my "ohana" one covered at some point, and I'm going to have "perfectly flawed" tatted over as well; I just want to move it elsewhere, considering I want something else where it already is. How many funerals have you attended? One or two. Have you lost anyone your age to death? No one that I was especially close to, thankfully. Have you ever witnessed a birth in person? Not a human one, thank Christ. I've seen cats give birth many times, and maybe other animals, but I'm not sure. What gender do you identify with? Female. What’s your opinion on astrology? It's total, ridiculous bullshit. Are you more of a science or math person? I'm clueless in math, while science makes sense to me and is far more interesting. What religion/spirituality do you identify with, if any? Theism. I think something made the universe, but I don't pretend to know jackshit about him/her/them/it. What is your opinion on peanut butter & banana sandwiches? I like them every now and again. What is your favorite book that was turned into a movie? The Outsiders, probably. Do you like the movie or the book better? This was so long ago that I honestly don't remember either well... so I really dunno. If you identify as a girl, would you ever consider getting a pixie cut? Yeah. If you identify as a boy, would you ever consider growing your hair out? N/A Are you a metalhead? I guess I mostly fit the definition, but I don't like labeling myself as such considering honestly, the metalhead community tends to have such a "that's not heavy enough" attitude and ridicule anything less than their interests and treat those that like softer metal as outcasts and/or posers. Not even trying to stereotype; befriend or observe people in this category and you'll see what I mean. Do you even listen to metal? Hell yes. Do you watch porn? No. If you don’t, do you have a moral reasoning behind that decision? I just find it... very strange. I don't see the appeal of watching. That's just something I want between me and my partner, you know? Like if you watch it, good for you, so long your s/o (if applicable) is aware and fine with it, but it ain't for me. Do you know anybody who is a Wiccan or Pagan? Yesssss, she's cool as fuck. I need to reconnect with her more. Do/did you ever attend church regularly? I did as a kid. Do you have a godmother/godfather/both? I have no clue. Do you listen to Supertramp? I have no clue who that is. Do you watch Supernatural? Not anymore. I think I stopped at the end of Season 6. What’s your favorite character in your favorite TV show? That '70s Show, probably Hyde. I love and relate to Eric, though. Honestly I love every single character; they're very unique to each other and recognizable with strong personalities. Both Fullmetal Alchemist iterations, most likely Edward. Or possibly one of the Sins, but I don't remember them all well... Oh. I know I loved Envy, for one. Are you wearing any rings right now? Yeah, my Supernatural friendship ring w/ Sara. Calling each other "bitch"/"jerk" between Sam and Dean is a thing in the show, so I have one that says "bitch" on the interior, and Sara has "jerk." Bracelets? Yes, also the one Sara gave me. Necklaces? No. Anklets? No. Chokers/collars? No. Do you go to a firework show every 4th of July? No. Are you diabetic? No. I'm forever proud of that considering it runs heavily in my family, yet even at my worst weight, I didn't develop it. But more importantly, a recent blood test I had for my thyroid or something showed I don't have any indicators of even coming close/being at any risk at this point in time. Are you allergic to gluten? No. Are you lactose intolerant? No. What is your favorite fruit? Strawberries, yum. Your favorite vegetable? Broccoli. Do you live with your parents? I live with my mom. Have you written a formal essay lately? Not in years. How much experience do you have written down on your resume, approximately? I don't have a resume currently, but if I did, it'd only have two months as a sales associate as my other two jobs were so short-lived it'd be stupid to add, especially when you consider the obvious fact that would make me look awful. How long have you had the shirt you’re wearing? A year. What happened last time you got drunk? N/A When’s the last time you straightened your hair? I have zero clue. Do you bite your toe nails? Wtf no. Last time you laughed your head off? Idr. Do you find piercings attractive? Yeah. Did you accept or reject your last friend request? I rejected it. Had no clue who it was, even though we had quite a handful of mutuals. How many cigarettes have you smoked today? N/A Do you have a hard time admitting you’re wrong? It depends on what the subject of the matter is. Do you like potato chips? Is there a human that doesn't???? Do you give out second chances way too easily? Yes. Ever stayed up all night on the phone? Not all night, no. There was one night Jason and I were up a long time talking, but it wasn't all night. What are you excited for? SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Have you ever shoplifted? No. If you have shoplifted, are you afraid of getting in trouble? And are you afraid to go back in that store? N/A Have you ever gotten caught shoplifting? If yes, what happened? N/A Have you ever plotted revenge against someone? No. Are you mad at someone right now? Nah. Have you ever egged someone’s house? Fuck no, because I'm not a dick. If not, have you ever WANTED to egg someone’s house? No. Have you ever wanted to kill someone? I was fucking psychotic when I found out Jason was in a new relationship after we broke up. For a long time I wanted her dead. Are you glad you don’t own a gun, because of what you might do with it? Quite honestly, yes. I'm impulsive on bad days, and I don't entirely cross out the possibility of me shooting myself on an awful day. Do you avoid people when they’ve hurt you? Yes. Do you make the most of every opportunity? No. Are you honestly succeeding at life, or failing? Failing miserably at most things. What does your newest journal look like? I don't remember the last time I got a journal. Is there anything you currently want but can’t have? A lot of things. Do you have no one you can trust? No, thankfully. Do you like meatball subs? No, they're so messy. Are you severely sleep deprived? No. What music are you listening to? "LA Devotee" by P!ATD just came on. If you go to school (HS or college), does your school have a rival? N/A What’s your school’s mascot? N/A If you have a sib, do you call him/her “brother” or “sister” sometimes? No. Do you own a Wii? If not, do you want one? Yes. Are there any songs you could just listen to over and over and over? No. I get tired of a song after around 100 repeats. No, I'm not kidding. Before you could loop YT vids (or anyway, before I was aware), I used a website that repeated the video for you and kept track of the repeats. Do you have a favorite basketball team (NBA or college?) No. Have you been baptized in any religious tradition? Yes. If your best male friend got a mohawk, would he look good or ridiculous? Save Him. What did you have for breakfast? A PopTart. What kind of booze did you last take shots of? I've never taken a shot. Have you slept over at a member of the opposite sex’s house in their bed? Yeah, but we were dating. Who last slept in your bed besides you? Sara. If the last person you had sex with asked you to date them, would you? No. What color is your car? (Or the one you drive most often) White. How long have you been single? (Or dating your current interest) Sara and I have been together a year and ten months. Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you that you were sexy? Yeah. Do you own any books written by musicians? Yeah, Ozzy's autobiography. What is your most interesting invention? Probably some RP characters. Have you ever seen someone sleepwalk? Once. Have you ever thought about getting your tongue pierced? It is pierced. When you’re bored in class, what do you usually do? N/A yet. Do you like your phone? NO. Honestly, are things going the way you planned? Bitch hell no. Who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts? The woman who adopted Kaiju. I miss him, damn. Have you ever snuggled with someone you weren’t dating? No. Do you know a James? I knew one years ago. If you had to choose to have a different accent than the one you have now, what accent would you choose and why? British. It sounds sophisticated and just generally attractive to me. Have you ever or do you currently live in a Gated Community? I don't and never have. Do you know how to use a DSLR camera? Yeah. Have you ever owned an Axolotl? No, but they cute. What has been the longest amount of time you’ve spent on a plane? I actually don't know. Probably just around two hours. How often do you use Snapchat? I don't have one/never had. Have you ever adopted an animal from an animal shelter? Yes. Where do you usually find surveys from? Tumblr, and if I'm desperate, LiveJournal. Have you ever missed a flight? Yep. The airport biz took WAY longer than any of us expected. What is your favorite film from your childhood? The Lion King. I think it's always been my fave, honestly, I just never really thought about JUST HOW MUCH I love the film and its story since I was a kid. Do you know anyone who is named after a state? Uhhh I know at least one Caroline, and that's close enough? Jason's mom's name is a state, too. What was the reason for your previous doctor’s visit? I was getting a full blood panel done to check my thyroid. Have you ever been to an outdoor cinema? No. Well, my elementary school and church used to do these "movies on the lawn" type things where they used a huge projector to play a movie outside around late evening, but I don't know if that counts. Have you ever had a “bad trip”? If yes, what happened? N/A How often do you use Instagram? I usually check it once a day or two to follow certain celebs' stories 'n shit. Have you ever smoked a cigarette? If so, do you still smoke? No. Adam Sandler or Jim Carrey? Jim. Do you enjoy learning about conspiracy theories? If so, what is your favorite? Y'all know I love me some conspiracies. My favorite - as in most interesting, not that I seriously believe in it - is the one that our current reality is just a simulation from a "future" civilization for study or just play purposes. It's interesting to think about with alarming evidence. Elon Musk 100% believing in it puts more "hey this might actually be worth considering" into it, but I think I lean more towards it being false. It's not something I think about much though as I have THE most Detroit: Become Human mindset about it ever, lmao. It just doesn't matter to me. Wow, what a ramble. Do you find hand tattoos attractive on your preferred sex? I find tattoos (usually) attractive in general, so like- What is your favorite Netflix original series? I have no clue what's Netflix-exclusive. I don't watch it. Have you ever owned a Tamagotchi? Yep, or at least something similar to it. My sister especially loved those little things. Do you have a favorite “survey blog” on Tumblr? If so, who? Dunno if tagging random people in surveys is annoying, so I'll break the link, but @/thedarkeststarsurveys seems super cool and nice. Would you rather be able to control fire or water? Probably fire for self-defense purposes, and I just like fire. Water seems... overall pretty useless to control, unless you can like, manifest it. Then you could solve a world of problems. Have you ever used your phone in class or at work without anyone knowing? Actually no. Have you ever been to Canada? No. What is your favorite condiment to put on fries? Ketchup. Do any famous people follow you on Twitter or Instagram? Definitely not to my knowledge, but I highly doubt it. Do you usually take the stairs or the elevator? Elevator. Even though I'm scared of them. Stairs and my horrible knees don't mix. What salads do you usually get on your Subway order? None. Have you ever made your own cocktails at home? Not myself. My old friend did. Have you seen all the Star Wars films? I watched the first three disinterestedly with Girt once, and neither of us liked them. I didn't get the appeal at all. Do you own any shirts with funny words or pictures on them? Yeah. Are your eyes the same color they were when you were a baby? They were more blue. Do you take the pickle off your burgers? No. Who do you share your bathroom with? Anyone else in the house. What color is your bed frame? Brown. Have you ever kissed someone you met that day? No. Do you share a bed with anyone? No. Well, excluding Roman and sometimes Teddy. Name all the people you know that you’ve seen today. My mom. When a car cuts you off, is the driver a jerk or is there an explanation? "Most of the time the driver is a jerk." <<< Yep. What are your thoughts on cosmetic surgery? You do you, boo. Has a man/woman ever broke your heart? If so, have you recovered? Yes, and yes as well as a PTSD victim can; your brain is literally changed after trauma, and considering I still have dreams/nightmares about him very regularly and he suddenly crosses my mind literally every single day despite never wanting to think about him, I don't think you could consider me totally recovered. Name a few things that make you really happy. Really happy? Being with Sara, Mark doing so much as blinking, long car rides with my music blaring way too loud, finding a new song and binging it for hours, a mount dropping in WoW goddamn y'all I have over 300, being complimented on my photography (or like... anything), my niece and/or nephew saying they love me or anything along those lines without being prompted (ex. when leaving, that kinda stuff), going to Olive Garden 'cuz breadsticks and spicy shrimp fritas lol, finishing a drawing and actually liking the result, getting Venus out and she acts like a cuddlebug the whole time, uh... other stuff that isn't coming to me. What’s your favorite type of sushi? Never tried it, don't want to. Have you ever read a book about a character in a psych ward? I don't think so. Have you ever been in a mental hospital as a patient? Too many times fuck but those days done fam. Do you take birth control pills? Currently for taming the pain and symptoms of my cycle, but it's hopefully changing to a longer, better solution soon to just totally eliminate it to remove its effects on my mood entirely for mental health tracking purposes. When’s the last time you got a new outfit? I don't buy full outfits. Do you have an imaginary best friend? (i.e., someone you wish was your best friend but currently isn’t) No. Do you like soy sauce? NO. Do you have a good doctor? I haven't had her long, but she's nice and seems knowledgeable. What’s your favorite store to browse around? Whew, Hot Topic my friends. Do you ever meditate on Scripture? No. Do you like poetry? Yeah. What’s the name of the most recent baby a friend had? Dawson. Do you have expensive tastes? Definitely not. What is your dream job? Meerkat biologist or paleontologist. What is your favorite music style currently? I've been digging power metal a lot lately. I like, live off of Powerwolf. I've been wanting to find more symphonic metal I enjoy, too... Are you wearing comfortable clothes right now? Yeah. Is there a bad habit you’re trying to break right now? Yeah, rather just keep it quiet. Is it easy to find a job in your preferred field in your home town? Fuck. No. When is the last time you went to a fun fair? ~August 2015. I remember it because it happened pretty shortly before the breakup. How about an amusement park? I have zero clue. Probably not since I went to Disney World as a child. Ladies: Would you ever consider proposing? If not, why not? If I'm with a woman, yes. I don't really have a proper reason why I wouldn't if I was with a man... I have NO problem with women proposing to men, I just think I'd personally feel weird. Oh, that makes sense; the fact of how I am with men - scared and doubtful - probably says a good deal. I'd want to see "oh wow he actually wants to be with me so much he's asking himself." Gentlemen: How would you feel, if you were proposed to? N/A Have you ever played the original Mass Effect trilogy? No. If so, which Shepard and who do you like romancing the best? N/A Let’s say there’s a person in need. They need money which they can’t make. Would you be more likely to help them out, if a celebrity asked you to? "Tbh right now I’m not really in a position to help anyone out financially. But hypothetically if I had the money to do so, some celebrity’s opinion wouldn’t matter." <<< This. When you go to a restaurant, do you have a go-to dish? Pretty much always. I don't tend to try new foods. Or do you always try out something new? ^ No. Would you rather live next to a kindergarten or an old folks’ home? Holy fuck, the latter. Living next to a school, esp. elementary, might even be a deal-breaker as far as buying a house goes. I'm not dealing with the noise and traffic. What was the last game that you played? I'm "playing" World of Warcraft currently, waiting for a stupid dinosaur to spawn to be denied a mount again. :^) What do you know about Finland? Nothing. Where was the postcard from that traveled the longest way to you? I don't think I've ever gotten a postcard. Have you ever made jewelry? Besides like those bead, "friendship," and plastic bracelets that were popular in the early 2000s, no. Which app do you use the most on your phone? Uhhhh I think Facebook? I don't use apps much. Did you learn to play an instrument as a kid? If so, which one? Recorders in elementary school and then flute in middle school-junior year in high school. What is the best part of your most ordinary day? Mark uploading cries. What’s your dad’s hair color? It's almost entirely gray now, but it's naturally black. Who was the last person you heard sing? Myself, I think. Surprisingly. Do you bite your lips a lot? My bottom one, occasionally. Have you ever dated someone with tattoos? For less than a day. Did you donate to Haiti? No. I've never had a source of stable income. Are your parents rich? BITCH- What’s your mom’s job? She's a pharmacy tech. Have you ever thrown up in public? Yes. In the middle of my 1st grade class lmaaaoooo. Have you ever failed gym in school? No. Are you scared of dogs? Nope. What reality show would you like to be in? None. What TV show makes you laugh? Most consistently, That '70s Show. Doesn't matter that I've seen I think every episode multiple times, I still laugh so easily at it. Family Feud gets me good too, if it's Steve Harvey hosting it. Have you ever heard of Joe Purdy? If so, do you like his music? Never heard of 'im. What is the saddest movie you’ve ever seen? Probably Johnny Got His Gun. Would you ever wear real fur? Fuck no. Who do you envy and why? Successful people. Because I'm the polar opposite. What color is the house you live in? Khaki. Which one of your friends is most likely to be famous one day? Why? Probablyyyy... Shannen. She is phenomenal at photography and already employed in NY with a fashion company for it. I am unbelievably envious of her, too, but also very happy. She deserves it. Do you have a favorite cousin? No. I rarely ever see my cousins, and if I do, it's usually just two. What is the worst present you have ever gotten? I've never gotten a "bad" gift. I appreciate the thought behind anything. Like I've gotten things entirely unrelated to me, but I still appreciate them. Who was it from? N/A Who is your favorite author? Don't have one. Do you shave your arms? No.

[actionjaxkol]

Crystal #?? - Interview with Jaxkol

“Alright, Interview... whatever number this is. Trixie Spinwhistle with the Gift of Gob --”

“Wait -- wait so how does this work?”

“I ask you questions and you answer ‘em, babe. S’not rocket surgery.”

“Oh. So what is --”

“Don’t hurt yourself, kid, save the brainpower for the answers.”

BASICS

► Name ➔   “Jaxkol Dawnsedge. Previously Shadowriot. Previously-Previously Shadowfel” ► Are you single ➔ “Nope! Some beautiful weirdo had a terrible lapse in judgement that I am not letting them weasel out of.” ► Are you happy ➔   “I actually don’t remember being this happy before. It’s... nice.” ► Are you angry ➔  “Weirdly, I get angry easier than I used to. Only when people are treating others unfairly though.” ► Are your parents still married ➔   “As far as I know. They’re Nobles, ‘divorce’ isn’t a thing they do. I think my mom has a consort though.”

NINE FACTS

► Birth Place ➔ “Silvermoon City” ► Hair Color ➔ “White blond naturally, the illusion makes it grey-black.” ► Eye Color ➔ “Green naturally, blue with illusion. Sometimes I wonder what color they’d be if they didn’t glow. I’m kinda jealous of humans and dwarves and stuff, their eyes can be all different colors.” “Focus, kid.” ► Birthday ➔ “May nineteenth.” ► Mood ➔ “Restless, anxious, eager but shy. Lonely, but the temporary type. At odds with myself” ► Gender ➔ “I’m a guy, but I’m also an elf and on the small side, so I get mistaken for a girl like, once an month. Not as much in Stormwind though, but it’s happened. It’s amusing.” ► Summer or winter ➔ “I dunno. Living on the streets, both suck, but it was easier to cool down than it was to warm up when you’re skinny. I have a home now, so I’m curious to see what winters are like. ...and now I’m thinking of Pryn as a snow bunny. Yeah I definitely want to see Winter.” ► Morning or afternoon ➔ “Afternoons. That’s when everyone is starting to wind down and relax. But lately I’ve had to get up super early for Argent training and watching the sun rise over the harbor is just... spiritual or somethin’.”

EIGHT THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE

► Are you in love ➔ “I keep... trying to tell myself ‘no’, that I’m being stupid but... yes. I absolutely am.” ► Do you believe in love at first sight ➔ “So, it kinda works opposite for me. If I fancy someone right off the bat, it’s gonna end bad. If my first thought is like ‘who the fuck do you think you are?’ then we’ll probably be friends forever. Or mortal enemies. Like, Noah and I fought when we first met, but we were friends until.... Anyhow. Jiang and I hit it off immediately, but fucker was married. I hated Vyn when we first met, but... I trust him with my life now, he’s my brother. Totegar I was smitten with from the start and he.. Yeah. Let’s not talk about him. I didn’t know what to make of Pryn at first, I thought she was my exact opposite and that we’d be at odds but she’s my best friend. Oh shit, and Izzy! I was fucking scared shitless of him when we met and now he’s my baby brother!” “Yes or no would’a sufficed, kid.” ► Who ended your last relationship ➔ “Totegar was afraid to come to terms with being gay, so he kinda settled for me. I was safe and harmless and non-threatening. When he figured out that sleeping with another guy wouldn’t bring about the next Cataclysm, he dropped me like a bad habit and went after someone better. Like. The very next morning. ...It’s whatever.” ► Have you ever broken someone’s heart ➔  “I wanna say ‘no’ but, I mean, maybe? I know I really hurt Jiang’s wife, Yue, when I told her but... I didn’t know so I couldn’t stop it. I might have broken Red’s heart by telling him no. Over and over and over again. And probably a few more times to come...” ► Are you afraid of commitments ➔ “I’m not afraid to throw myself body and (what’s left of my) soul into things, but I’m terrified that I’m going to let people down...” ► Have you hugged someone within the last week? ➔ “Yeah! I used to be really afraid of contact, anytime anyone touched me it was ya know. Never for good stuff. Vyn started making a point to hug and touch me just in a friendly way. And then I get to the Keg and people aren’t afraid to hug me and it’s.. Nice.” “Man, you are a talker...” “Sorry...” “Nah, this is good.” ► Have you ever had a secret admirer ➔ “I don’t... think so? I’m just amazed I have not-secret admirers.” ► Have you ever broken your own heart? ➔ “Yeah... a lot. Like... daily. Wait is that not normal?” “...No, kid.”

SIX CHOICES

► Love or lust ➔ “Love. I mean, I think you need some lust in a relationship, but you need that love first. Otherwise it’s just... meaningless.” ► Cats or Dogs ➔ “So my sister Jaelys used to have a cat, and she loved that damn thing. In Silvermoon, cats are everywhere, right? But this one used to like, ride on her shoulder and sleep in her lap while she studied. She even got it this pretty collar and like... we didn’t have spending money so I don’t know how she got it. Anyhow, my brother I guess didn’t like it as much, cuz when he was rising into the Fel arts, he used the cat for a ritual. I’ve never seen my sister cry, but... I did see something die in her eyes when he brought her the little body...” “...Kid?” “...Hmm? Oh! ...Dogs. I like dogs.” ► A few best friends or many regular friends ➔ “I get... really attached to people fast. Like, if I’m going to get close to someone at all, I’m in for everything. So... probably a few best friends. But I’m friends with everyone until they give me a reason not to be! Hey, like a dog I guess!” ► Wild night out or romantic night in ➔ “It’s hard to say. I really like going out and getting that energy out, but being alone with someone special, just... watching them do those little, meaningless, private things that make up their secret world... It’s so beautiful I never want to leave it.” ► Day or night ➔ “Day is hot and involves a lot of running. Night.”

FIVE HAVE YOU EVERS

► Been caught sneaking out ➔ “Growing up it never crossed my mind to disobey. If had to leave the apartment for any reason, I got permission from either Mother, or Father or failing that one of my two eldest siblings. Jaelys and I always had to have escorts. When I was living with Vyn for a while, I’d sneak out if... my brain started eating itself, I guess. He always found me though. So. Yes?” ► Fallen down/up the stairs ➔ “Yeah my feet and I don’t always communicate correctly. I’ve tripped over my own shadow.” ► Wanted something/someone so badly it hurt? ➔ “Yes... But it’s this weird, beautiful pain. I like being close to her because when she’s not there, I can’t believe that I have someone so amazing in my life. If I told her that she’s just call me stupid and whack me with her tail though.” ► Wanted to disappear ➔ “...yes... I have disappeared a few times. I can’t... seem to make it stick though. I guess for the best.”

FOUR PREFERENCES

► Smile or eyes ➔ “I like a smile that takes up the entire face. I mean the kind that makes the eyes bright like the stars. I like it when the mouth and the eyes agree with eachother. Izzy has an amazing smile that just lights up everything. Vyn’s is strong, protective, kinda like Ash’s. Jiira’s has secrets. Pryn’s has light that like... changes colors. Vali’s is hard and cold, but there’s fire beneath it. Drex’s is mischief. Kae is fire, white hot or smouldering embers, rarely anything in between. Aida... Aida is made of chocolate and cheesecake and -- oh shit chocolate cheesecake that’s a great idea.” “What about mine?” “...Sharp. Your smile is a blade and your eyes cut through people...” ► Shorter or Taller ➔ “I got a thing for people bigger than me. Which I guess isn’t hard.” ► Intelligence or Attraction ➔  “Humor. I’m not smart, so everyone is more intelligent than me. And I don’t.. really get attracted to people’s outside the same way other people do I guess. I don’t go ‘DAMN that dude has a nice ass, I must pursue him’ it’s more like... ‘your personality is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, I need to see every angle of it, good or bad’. Fuck, I would probably fall for a blighted murlock if we got along well enough.” ► Hook-up or Relationship ➔ “I’ve done the hookup thing, it doesn’t... it just... makes that void worse. Like drinking saltwater.”

FAMILY

► Do you and your family get along ➔ “No.” “...what that’s it? Kid you’ve rambled on ‘cat versus dog’ and that’s all I get?” “I... failed. I’ll pay for it when my luck runs out, but.. No. Three sisters, two brothers, and my parents - no we don’t get along.” ► Would you say you have a “messed up life” ➔ “I really don’t think so, but I’ve been told otherwise. I think everyone goes through their awful shit, just cuz mine is more colorfully explosive, doesn’t mean it’s any more messed up than anyone elses’.” ► Have you ever ran away from home ➔ “Not before the Incident, and after that, I didn’t exactly have a home to run away from. I ran away from Vyn when I was supposed to be staying with him and got overwhelmed, but I don’t think that’s the same thing.” ► Have you ever gotten kicked out ➔ “Yeah.” “...is that all you’re gonna say on that?” “Yeah.”

FRIENDS

► Do you secretly hate one of your friends ➔ “What?? No that’s fucked up. We might not get along, but I don’t hate anyone.” ► Do you consider all of your friends good friends ➔ “I mean, some are better or closer than others, but I think everyone is exactly how they need to be.” ► Who is your best friend ➔ “Ah shit, hard question. I don’t have just one ‘best’ friend, they’re all amazing in their own ways. Sera is pretty awesome, I love Izzy. Kae is amazing and strong and I envy her. Pryn knows me probably better than Vyn at this point. Aida is adorable...I can’t... really answer this. Though now I’m curious if I’m anyone’s best friend.” ► Who knows everything about you ➔ “Pryn or Vynlluthein.”

(Art by @attractive-zombies Big ole stack of art here. )

Tagging: @attractive-zombies @wests-wow-gang @rouilleandcompany @lemmeaxeyousomething

[gracelingdesolate]

Noctin and Konas for all of them ;D

A: Aptitude

1. what are your oc’s natural abilities, things they’ve been doing since young?Noctin: he’s smart and able to figure stuff out p quicklyKonas: determination, if he wants to do something he will do it

2. what activities have they participated in?Noctin: swordfighting, a little bit of how to dress upKonas: weapons training

3. what abilities do they have that they’ve worked for?Noctin: obviously his abilities, but more importantly being understandingKonas: his powers

4. what things are they bad at?Noctin: cookingKonas: swimming

5. what is their most impressive talent?Noctin: his quick thinkingKonas: fire powers

B: Basics

1. what is their hair color?black for both

2. what is their eye color?Noctin: brown, then silver and light blueKonas: red and purple

3. how tall are they?Noctin: 5′2Konas: 5′5

4. how old are they?Noctin: by the end he’s like 16/17Konas: not sure but i’ve been thinking about bumping him up a bit

5. how much do they weigh?Noctin: ~97lbsKonas: ~140lbs

C: Comfort

1. how do they sit in a chair?Noctin: likes to perch but will sit normally for the most partKonas: normal

2. in what position do they sleep?Noctin: fetal positionKonas: back

3. what is their ideal comfort day?Noctin: lazy hanging out with friendsKonas: baking the shit out of himself in the sun, friends are invited

4. what is their major comfort food? why?Noctin: his mom used to make this very good small sweet bread type thing and it’s the only sweet thing he’ll ever eat bc it reminds him of herKonas: meat bc it tastes the best

5. who is the best at comforting them when down?Noctin: anrenKonas: sarín

D: Decoration

1. how would they decorate a house if they had one under their name?Noctin: probably pretty empty tbh other than like the essentials, though he would have some decorative pieces aroundKonas: small house, not conventionally decorated, just stuff he finds neat

2. how would they decorate their child’s room?i have no idea they’re both still really young kjhgfgdkfj

3. how do they decorate their own room?Noctin: books just everywhereKonas: his room’s a damn mess

4. what type of clothes and accessories do they wear?both wear pretty practical clothing and all

5. do they like makeup/nail/beauty trends?Noctin: i can see him being interested in and wanting to try them outKonas: no he thinks they’re a waste of money

E: External Personality

1. does the way they do things portray their internal personality?Noctin: kinda?Konas: good god yes

2. do they do things that conform to the norm?Noctin: yeKonas: sometimes

3. do they follow trends or do their own thing?Noctin: follows trendsKonas: does his own thing 

4. are they up-to-date on the internet fads?no internet

5. do they portray their personality intentionally or let people figure it out on their own?both typically portray it intentionally

F: Fun

1. what do they do for fun?Noctin: readsKonas: mock fights with sarín

2. what is their ideal party?both of them would just want a quiet one with close friends/family

3. who would they have the most fun with?Noctin: he and mieron got into so much shit in the huntersKonas: sarín

4. can they have fun while conforming to rules?usually yes for both

5. do they go out a lot?nope for both

G: Gorgeous

1. what is their most attractive external feature?eyes for both

2. what is the most attractive part of their personality?Noctin: kindKonas: sweetheart

3. what benefits come with being their friend?both of them are very very protective of their friends

4. what parts of them do they like and dislike?Noctin: likes his hair, dislikes his eyes for a long timeKonas: likes his build and how strong he is, dislikes his scars

5. what parts of others do they envy?Noctin: brown eyes/being humanKonas: no scars

H: Heat

1. do they rather a hot or cold room?hot for both

2. do they prefer summer or winter?summer for both

3. do they like the snow?no snow in cierro

4. do they have a favorite summer activity?Noctin: swimmingKonas: sunbathing

5. do they have a favorite winter activity?if there was snowNoctin: sleddingKonas: bonfires with hot cocoa

I: In-the-closet

1. what is their sexuality?Noctin: biKonas: pan

2. have they ever questioned their sexuality?nope to both

3. have they ever questioned their gender?Noctin: yeKonas: no

4. would/was their family be okay with them being LGBT?yes for both

5. how long would/did it take for them to come out?Noct came out as trans when he was like really little and neither of them really hid their sexualities

J: Joy

1. what makes them happy?Noctin: peace and quietKonas: training with sarín

2. who makes them happy?Noctin: his friendsKonas: Sarín knows best how to make him happy

3. are there any songs that bring them joy?haven’t figured music out

4. are they happy often?Noctin: he used to be, and he tries to be moreKonas: he tries to be

5. what brings them the most joy in the world?Noctin: being with shiron, chito, and mikaKonas: being with sarín

K: Kill

1. have they ever thought about suicide?yes to both

2. have they ever thought about homicide?both have already killed

3. if they could kill anyone without punishment, would they? who?Noctin: HasceKonas: probably Dier since he’s the leader of the Hunters, tho Hasce later on too

4. who would miss them if they died?Noctin: depending on where in the story either not many people or a good handfulKonas: most of the desolates tbh

5. who would be happy they died, anyone?Noctin: Hasce wouldn’t be complaining, and after the reveal like most of the huntersKonas: a lot of hunters

L: Lemons

1. what is their favorite fruit?Noctin: orangesKonas: apples

2. what is their least favorite fruit?Noctin: cherries are too sweetKonas: oranges

3. are there any foods they hate?Noctin: sweet stuffKonas: fish

4. do they have any food intolerances?nope to both

5. what is their favorite food?Noctin: the sweet thing his mother used to makeKonas: meat sandwiches

M: Maternal

1. would they want a daughter or a son?i don’t think either of them would mind

2. how many children do they want?not sure since they’re both still young

3. would they be a good parent?hopefully

4. what would they name a son? what would they name a daughter?Noctin: if he had a daughter he’d name her Marie after his motherKonas: not sure

5. would they adopt?definitely for both

N: Never Have I Ever

1. what would they never do?Noctin: cut his hair super shortKonas: swim

2. what have they never done that they want to do?Noctin: Finish his medical trainingKonas: fix his fear of dogs

3. is there anything they absolutely can’t believe people do?Noctin: hurt other people intentionallyKonas: hurt kids

4. what is the most embarrassing thing they’ve done?Noctin: probably a training incident gone wrong tbhKonas: accidentally set Sarín on fire

5. have they done anything they thought they’d never do?Noctin: use his powers for playKonas: breathe fire

O: Optimism

1. are they optimistic or pessimistic?both are surprisingly optimistic

2. are they openly optimistic, throwing it on others?Noctin: noKonas: he’s forcefully optimistic for himself and sometimes it gets overbearing on others

3. are they good at giving advice?Noctin: yesKonas: you should take his advice with a grain of salt

4. is there anyone in their life that throws optimism on them?sarín for both

5. were they always optimistic?yes to both

P: Personality

1. what is their best personality trait?Noctin: kindnessKonas: determination

2. what is their worst personality trait?Noctin: quick to anger, little bit of a cowardKonas: can get very narrow minded

3. what of their personality do others love?Noctin: his friendliness before everything went to shit and then after all that people admired his tenacityKonas: he’s very sweet and affectionate once you get to know him

4. what of their personality do others envy?Noctin: he’s still a bit optimistic even after everythingKonas: his drive

5. do they hate anything about their personality/about other’s personalities?Noctin: he feels he’s very weak willed and he hates itKonas: he doesn’t like how short sighted/narrow minded he can get

Q: Questions

1. do they ask for help?Noctin: yes always except for just after he finds out he’s a desolateKonas: not usually if he asks for help it’s bc he really can’t do it

2. do they ask questions in class?yes to both

3. do they answer questions that make them a little uncomfortable?no to both

4. do they ask weird questions?Noctin: yesKonas: no

5. are they curious?yes but noct is definitely moreso

R: Rules

1. do they follow rules?yes to both

2. would they be a strict or laid-back parent?i think both would be more on the strict side

3. have they ever been consequenced for breaking a rule?yes to both, though noct definitely had to deal with worse consequences

4. have they broken any rules they now regret breaking?yes to both

5. do they find any rules they/others follow absolutely ridiculous?yes to both

S: Streets

1. are they street-smart?yes to both

2. would they give money to someone on the streets?noctin would have when he was younger but now it’s no from both

3. have they ever gotten in a fight on the streets?yes to both

4. has anything happened to them on the streets?yes to both

5. are they cautious when out?they both have to be

T: Truth

1. are they honest?Noctin: sometimesKonas: pretty much always

2. can they tell if someone is lying?Noctin: sometimesKonas: usually

3. is it obvious when they’re lying?Noctin: yesKonas: he p much tells the truth so when he lies most people just take it as the truth

4. have they lied about anything they regret lying about?Noctin: oh yea definitelyKonas: yeah he used to lie about how he was doing back when he was recovering and it would make his friends really worried and he feels bad about it so now he tries to tell the truth about how he’s doing physically

5. have they told truths that have been spread against their will?Noctin: we wouldn’t have a story otherwise KJHGJFKonas: yeah

U: Underdog

1. have they been bullied?Noctin: yes lotsKonas: not really

2. have they bullied anyone?Noctin: yeKonas: nobody that didn’t deserve it

3. have they been physically attacked by a bully?Noctin: yesKonas: god no nobody’s that dumb

4. have they ever been doubted?Noctin: constantlyKonas: yes

5. have they surprised people with being good at something?Noctin: people don’t expect him to be good at singingKonas: 

V: Vomit

1. do they vomit often?no for both

2. do they get lots of stomach aches?no for both

3. are they good at comforting someone ill?noct is, konas will just be like “damn that sucks”

4. what do they like as far as comfort goes?Noctin: 6580789505845984659685396856 blanketsKonas: quiet

5. do they burp, cough, or hiccup most when nauseous? when vomiting?what the fuckcough??

W: Water

1. do they drink enough water?both try to

2. have they learned to swim?Noctin: yesKonas: no

3. do they like to swim?Noctin: yeKonas: he will literally drown so no

4. can they dive?Noctin: yes but he’s not very good at itKonas: he can sink

5. can they swim without holding their nose?Noctin: yesKonas: noooooooooooo

X: Xylophone

1. what is their favorite genre of music?2. do they have a favorite song?3. do they have a favorite band/artist/singer?i don’t have music figured out

4. can they sing well?Noctin: y e sKonas: ehhhh maybe?

5. can they rap?both could if they wanted to

Y: You

1. how old were you when you created them?Noctin: 14 I think?Konas: 15 or 16

2. what inspired you to create them?Noctin: Graceling!Konas: TPH actually bc it made me realize if noct didn’t have more friends in his world he wasn’t going to make it and also writing sad shit 24/7 is boring if there’s no happiness

3. were they different when they were first created?Noctin: oh god yes he was an adult and the hunters didn’t exist so he was a bounty hunter or something it was wildKonas: not really? he’s gotten more fleshed out but other than that he hasn’t changed much

4. do you enjoy writing them more than other characters?Noctin: depends but usually yeKonas: i’ve enjoyed writing him more as i’ve fleshed him out more and given him like Actual Emotions

5. what’s your favorite thing about them?Noctin: he’s very kind hearted and i’m very happy when it starts to come back out after all the crap that happensKonas: his drive like oh my god he will do anything he sets his mind to i wish i had even an ounce of it

Z: Zebra

1. what’s their favorite animal?Noctin: horsesKonas: borudas

2. do they like animals?Noctin: not particularlyKonas: ye

3. cats or dogs?cats for both

4. what’s their dream pet?Noctin: horseKonas: something cuddly

5. do they have any pets at the moment?nope for both

[paradox-oflife]

so my dear friend @lememecollector memecollectorhas asked me to do this but I’m 99% sure I’ve already done this tag before. But, I’ll do it for you, my friend

5 Basics about me:

Name: Esther

Gender: Female

Height: 5’1” or 2 (I’m so short ;-;)

Orientation: Straight

Race: Taiwanese

5 Things on my blog:

Memes/shitposts/funfacts - The average tumblr blog. Nothing too bad.

Important news and crap around the world - And occasionally politics. But I try not to dwell too much in it.

Gaming - Overwatch, Fire Emblem, Assassin’s Creed, idk whatever I’m interested in

Animals - especially cats and dogs and birbs

Nature - I’m a sucker for sunsets

5 things you can find in my room

Papers - Papers about what? Who knows. Even I don’t know. Drawings, old homework, trash, you name it.

Books - A whole shelf full of books, would you look at that! I’ve read almost everything in middle school

Laptop/phone - tumblr, Reddit, instagram, Snapchat, YouTube (and this weird app that produces aesthetic sounds and images). You know. And everything else that comes with the phone.

Stuffed animals - A part of me that will never grow up. I refuse to let them go.

Textbooks - Spanish, two math textbooks, history, science, and more.

5 things I always wanted to do

Learn more about other countries and cultures - Isn’t it just weird to think about how there’s other people living on the other side of the world, that have their own lives? And they’re just like you, living their life? Idk it might only be me or smth but its mind blowing for me.

Learn to drive - I am learning it right now but, the actual skill to drive seems so distant. And I’m not a really attentive person sometimes.

You know those scenes in movies and whatever where a protagonist or smth is with their friends and they drive to like the middle of nowhere and just look at the stars with food and music? And they have no stress about school or the future? Yeah it looks really nice.

I’m not really sure how to explain this but, I just want to be done. With school, and the future. Like you know back in middle/elementary school when it was summer you literally had nothing to worry about? Sometimes I wish I could still have that moment, and freeze time.

Make a really close online friend. I’m currently getting there but I’m awkward when it comes to talking to new people. On the other hand if you asked any of my friends if I’m a quiet person they’d probably laugh

5 things that make me happy

Rediscovering music I listened to years ago. Just soakin in the nostalgia. Such a weird melancholy feeling.

My friends - They never stop making me laugh. I always feel so blessed to have them by my side everyday.

My dog - I love him so much. When I go home and I’m having a bad day, i just hug him. And I envy him too. He doesn’t have to worry about anything except me coming home safe.

WheN yOU FIniSH a ProJeCt AnD YoU CAN FInAlLY CloSE alL thE taBS on yoUr winDow and JusT LAy IN BEd ANd RelEase a ScREAM INTo yOUr PIlloW Of ReLIef

You ever find a post on tumblr that makes you laugh and genuinely smile? Like one time I found a post during school and I just sat there with a really goofy smile on my face every time I thought of it.

5 things on my to do list

So me and my friends have penny boards and we’ve all really wanted to go cruising around the neighborhood. There’s a really nice place called Santana Row, filled with chill vibes and aesthetic lighting during the night. It’s going to happen one day.

Be decently fluent in another language besides English and Chinese. Like I learned Spanish (I think most people did in middle school) in middle school, and like I can read it? But wouldn’t it be so cool to learn something random like Italian? Just randomly walk into a place like Italy, and a random Asian busts out in fluent Italian. That’d be nice.

Graduate with a GPA above 3.4. I’m someone who gets mainly As and Bs, so it’s not too bad right now. But second semester just started and I’m still trying hard, so there’s hope for the future.

Find time to draw more. It used to be a something to do in my free time to relax but now it’s more like “Free time? What’s free time? The only free time is sleeping and going on your phone”

5 things you might not know about me

I can play piano, cello, and the ukulele. I can play drums but I don’t have a drum set at home and like, I haven’t played in two years.

I have this scar on my right cheek that’s kind of visible. It’s more of a white line that just runs down from the bottom of my eyelid to a little more than the center of my cheek. Now that is a long story that I’ve gotten bored of explaining because at least 50 people have asked me, “Is that a scar? How’d you get it?” In a nutshell, don’t think you know how to ride a bike when you haven’t rode one in 8 years

I have ADHD. ADD specifically, cause I’m not really hyperactive. And I fidget a lot. And bounce my leg a lot. And if we were in a really interesting conversation I can talk For a really really long time. And later in 8th grade I developed some mild form of anxiety. Like when you eat a food that’s spicy, but it’s not spicy enough to burn your tongue, if you get that analogy?

People say I have sharp canine teeth. But I really don’t think it’s that sharp? I mean, like i can say that it’s slightly sharper than normal, but not like fangs. I don’t know what this fact about me is really, people say it a lot and I just wanted to throw it out there and say it’s not that sharp! I’m looking at you especially @paradoxxnutellaa. AND YOU TOO @lememecollector

Um, I wish I had another mildly interesting fact. But I’m really determined to just squeeze one more fact. I’ve never broken a single bone, or sprained a muscle before. It’s not even a special fact about me because I’m sure at least somebody that reads this has also never broken a bone or sprained a muscle.

Anyone I wanna tag?: I mean I would tag @1xile but I’m sure you’ve already done it before? Like I don’t know how I know, but I’m pretty sure you’ve already done it. I ALSO WANNA TAG EVERYONE THAT FOLLOWS ME BUT WE DON’T TALK BUT THAT”S A WHOLE LOTTA PEOPLE. (TuMBLR THINKS SOME OF Y’ALL HAVE SENSITIVE MEDIA SO SRRY IF I DONT FOLLOW BACK) (except if ur a porn blog, then you can screw off m8)

[danfanciesphil]

A jealous Dan prompt? Not mean or angsty just like idk sometimes Dan gets jealous?

Jealous!Dan is literally my weakness ily

Got a prompt for me? Hit up my ask box! (Please be aware that due to an abundance of prompts, your prompt may take a few days to complete - but thank you all for submitting so far!)

Phil is an attractive person. 

Dan is acutely aware of this, and has been ever since he first saw an AmazingPhil video on YouTube. Whilst he’s not the most hair-raising, breathtaking beauty on the planet, there is no denying his good fortune in the looks department. Icy blue eyes, pale skin, jet black hair. It’s like the stuff of fairytales - and Phil pulls it off well.

More than this though, Phil’s attractiveness comes through in the way he is. In the way he acts, speaks, talks, and even thinks about things. 

Sure, you might check him out briefly on the street and note his good looks, but it’s when you actually engage him in conversation, or spend time with him doing almost any activity, that you begin to realise just how fortunate you are to be in his presence at all. 

He’s witty, and clever. He’s got a vast plethora of knowledge tucked away, but he’s modest about it, and tends to surprise people by peppering facts or proper, well-structured, carefully formed opinions into conversation. 

He’s a kind, gentle soul, but he’s ambitious and fiercely loyal of his friends, never afraid to stand up for those in the wrong, or for what he believes in. 

These aspects of Phil’s personality are things that Dan has grown to love. He discovers new parts of his boyfriend every day, and is regularly astounded by how truly magnificent he is as a person; it’s rather baffling, really, that he chooses to be with Dan, who is significantly younger, and far less well-rounded.

But putting Phil’s love-blindness aside, Dan is proud of himself for recognising the superior qualities of Phil Lester, especially as many people tend to overlook them. 

It’s when they don’t overlook them that things get a little... trickier. 

For instance, right now, they’re at a party. It’s New Year’s Eve, and some of Phil’s old friends from university (he has so many that Dan can barely keep track, let alone name the person whose flat he’s currently in) are having a party. 

Dan likes Phil’s old friends a lot, of course. But at the same time, he can’t help but envy them, for having so much time with Phil before Dan even knew he existed. 

They share memories that Dan will never be a part of. They know him so well, and Dan is trying to match their level of Phil-knowledge, but it’s a slow, painful process. It takes time to build a friendship that will rival theirs, Dan knows. 

Also, Dan has no way of knowing what their relationship to Phil was in the past. 

When Dan says that Phil has a lot of friends, he is not exaggerating, and they come in all genders. Not that Phil is particularly fussed about such things, Dan supposes, but he has noticed that girls in particular make beelines towards him when he enters these parties. 

Right now, for instance, Phil is deep in conversation with three girls, all of whom have introduced themselves to Dan and seem like perfectly friendly, fun people. 

Unfortunately, Dan has a condition that renders him unable to take their personalities into account, and it only worsens when he’s drunk.

Jealousy. 

The expression goes that it’s an ugly emotion, and Dan can’t think of a better way in which to describe it. It’s awful, and all-consuming, making him feel like a horrible monster of a person, but Dan simply cannot suppress it. 

He’s been sticking to Phil’s side since they got here, practically glued to him as he wanders around talking to everyone. He’s also being almost creepily quiet, just watching the conversations unfolding around him, eyeing everyone with suspicion, answering direct questions monosyllabically. 

“... I could swear you’ve gotten taller!” One girl says to Phil, laughing like it’s hilarious. Dan narrows his eyes at her, trying not to scowl. He takes another swig of Malibu straight from the bottle to distract himself - it doesn’t work. “How is that possible? You make me look like a child when you stand next to me.”

As if to demonstrate, the girl - Dan thinks her name is Jessica - presses herself against Phil’s side, wobbling a little on tipsy legs. Her halterneck dress leaves a lot of skin on show around her shoulders and back, and she isn’t shy about pressing it against Phil’s arm. 

“Cara, how bad is it?” Maybe-Jessica asks another girl standing in their huddle. 

Cara laughs, framing them with her hands as though trying to snap a mental photo. “Not gonna lie, he’s at least a foot taller.”

Jessica throws her head back, laughing more. She hits Phil playfully on the arm, and Dan only just manages to stop himself tackling her to the floor for it. 

“Phi-il, stop making me look bad! I’m in heels for God’s sake!”

Phil chuckles, a little pink-cheeked. “Sorry. Must be all that standing in soil I’ve been doing since I last saw you.”

Apparently, this is the funniest joke in the world, because Cara and Jessica are practically in tears with laughter. Jessica is hanging off Phil’s arm now, and Dan can actually feel the blood in his veins beginning to simmer. He wants to grab hold of Jessica’s halterneck tie and yank her backwards, possibly towards the nearest open window. 

He can’t stand feeling like this. His hand twitches by his side. He must be glaring now, but nobody seems to notice. He sips some more Malibu.

All of a sudden, Jessica ‘trips’, seemingly on the air itself, falling forwards a bit, just in time for Phil to catch her. His arms steady on her waist, and she giggles, one hand over her mouth, staring up at him through her fake lashes. 

“Whoops!” She says, a little more softly now. “One too many squadka’s, I think.” She pauses, and Phil laughs awkwardly, trying to draw his hands away. Dan catches his eye, and Phil reddens, attempting to free himself from inside Jessica’s personal bubble. Her hands grab his wrists, holding them in place, and she smiles at him, flirtatious. “Being so tall and strong has its benefits, I suppose.”

She bites her lip, and that is the moment Dan snaps. His teeth grind together, and he pushes Cara to one side, rather rudely, forcing himself between Phil and Jessica without apology. He finds Phil’s hand and grips it, hard, then turns to Jessica, eyes ablaze. 

“He’s mine.” 

It’s all he needs to say, apparently. Jessica totters backwards, her mouth open in a little ‘o’. Dan doesn’t care, he needs to do something about the viscous, burning heat racing through his whole body. He drags Phil across the room, past groups of bewildered looking twenty-somethings, and over to the wall. 

There’s a small spot between the TV and the radiator, and Dan pulls Phil down into it, their backs to the walls. He places his hand on Phil’s thigh, a little overly possessive perhaps, but necessary. Phil is saying something, apparently rather perplexed by what’s happening, but Dan is barely listening. 

He drinks another gulp of Malibu, then places the bottle to one side.

“...it’s just you haven’t really said anything all night, and now you go and basically attack Jess for just-”

Dan swings his leg over Phil’s, climbing onto his lap with practised efficiency. He pushes his lips into Phil’s shutting him up at once. He kisses hard, being rough and messy because he kind of wants it to hurt a bit. He wants Phil to realise how furious this has made him, and to respond in kind, to reassure Dan that there’s nothing to be worried about. 

Phil doesn’t respond much at first, but Dan is expecting this. They haven’t told anyone at this party they’re together. Phil has been introducing Dan as ‘his friend’. It’s not for any particular reason, they’re just being careful. They don’t want to share something so personal with just anyone, and one can never be too sure of the reaction when it’s a queer relationship. 

Then, after a while, once the shock of it has passed, Phil’s hands find Dan’s waist - his strong, sure hands, no longer gripping that bitchy girl’s sides - and he tugs Dan closer, kissing back just as hard. 

Dan bites at his lips, all teeth and tongue as he attacks Phil’s mouth, hoping everyone is watching, and everyone can see just how little Phil belongs to any of them anymore. 

“You’re mine,” Dan growls against him, pushing his hips down into Phil’s crotch, wanting to hammer the point home. “No one else gets to touch you.”

Breathless, with glazed eyes, Phil nods at him, diving back in for another kiss. 

“It’s okay,” Phil tells him, tilting his head willingly as Dan mouths along his jaw, scraping his teeth down his neck. “I’m- ah! I’m yours.” 

Dan nods in agreement, then bites, hard, sucking a bruise into Phil’s throat. He wants it to be a deep crimson, big and sprawling over Phil’s pretty pale throat. He wants it to darken over time, impossible to ignore as it purples and deepens, making people blush as they realise what it is. 

Phil just lets him do it, for some reason. 

Normally, they don’t allow love bites. Filming videos would be a nightmare, for a start, plus they take too long to disappear. 

But Phil is passive now, just breathing heavily, his hands gripping Dan’s waist as Dan sucks on the skin. Finally, he leans away, satisfied with his work. 

“Now they’ll know for sure.” Dan says, surveying his artwork with pleasure. He wants to leave another, almost immediately, to cover Phil in them all over his body. Maybe later, when they’re alone. He hums to himself in contentment, liking the idea immensely. “Mine.” 

People are staring; Dan can feel their eyes. He doesn’t give a fuck, let them. Let everyone see how he has Phil cornered here, and how he doesn’t want to leave. Let the whole damn world realise that Phil is his, and that any attempt to sway him in a different direction will not end well. 

Dan knows he’ll feel less crazy in the morning. The jealousy will have faded somewhat, though it will sit, as ever, simmering just beneath his skin, ready to leap out and turn him into a possessive monster once more. 

For now, though, Dan is not letting Phil out of his sight. Midnight is hours away, but Dan isn’t sure he can wait that long. Phil looks pretty elated too, his pupils blown, and eyes trained on Dan’s face. Perhaps they could skip the rest of this reunion. 

Home is just a taxi ride away, after all. 

(Based off these photos)

[handweavers]

since the moment i came out to myself a little over a year ago my relationship with and understanding of myself has grown exponentially and changed so much, especially on a physical level. realizing why i struggled with my body for so long, going through awful dysphoria, undergoing top surgery and feeling my muscles ache and heal, lose their strength and gain it back slowly, my skin heal from black and blue bruises to unmarked healthy skin, my incision scars go from being held together with stitches to mending to fading into smooth pink lines, starting testosterone and injecting myself with a needle in my own thigh muscle every single week for the past seven months, experiencing the changes and shifts in how i look and feel and navigate the world physically, understanding how my body works from the inside out and seeing myself evolve and learning all these small intimate things about myself and examining my mindset and thoughts and emotions every step of the way and surviving an absolute roller coaster of grief, sorrow, envy so powerful it tore me up, disbelief, a lot of fear and uncertainty, and slowly little inklings of happiness, contentment that snuck up on me without realizing so many times - all of that has changed me fundamentally as a person and i struggle to remember my life before.

it's weird, because i know it was me obviously, i know i lived through those 19 years of my life and it was significant but when i try to remember even to how i felt before top surgery it comes back to me slowly and fragmented and with a sense of disconnect. i struggle to recall even the recovery process for top surgery and it happened only eight months ago. my psychologist remarked that after top surgery and starting testosterone my brain had a sort of post-trauma response in that it just deleted everything and hid it behind this weird milky haze. my brain essentially decided that everything that happened before was no longer relevant to me. it was fundamental in my growth as a person and impacts me to this day but my brain just sort of chose to forget a lot of it. i'm not entirely sure why that happened - whether the trauma of being forcibly gendered as a woman for 19 years just messed me up that badly or my brain didn't know what to do with any of that or it recognized a new chapter in my life that i couldn't turn back from. i don't know and i don't really care. i want to move forward.

in a lot of ways i feel more alive than i've ever been and the whole world feels brand new and overwhelming and vast and the person i am - the person i'm growing into - is slowly being revealed little by little, as i create myself, as i seek to understand myself entirely and really know the person i see in the mirror every day. i ran from him for my entire life and now he's here a little more every day and i'm getting to know him. he's the same person i've always been, and i am the same person, but it's complicated. i gave birth to my authentic self early this year and i'm still figuring out what that means and where to go from here. i'm afraid of what i might find but there's healing in every step i take, even when it hurts, and despite the pain i've been through since coming out if i really had the choice to go back and keep running from the person in the mirror i'd still come out and transition because the wealth of knowledge and insight i've gained about myself and the world around me is invaluable and i couldn't have gotten it any other way.

[kuno-chan]

Rama and Taani(The twins) 22-40 and 43

22. How does jealousy manifest itself in them (they become possessive, they become aloof, etc)?

Rama and Taani are definitely different in that aspect. Rama will begin making very pointed jabs when he talks, he’s always been the smartass of the family so his mouth is generally how he handles things. Taani, on the other hand, will probably be the one more likely to become physically possessive.

23. How does envy manifest itself in them (they take what they want, they become resentful, etc)?

Again, Rama is liable to use his mouth. His way of dealing with the worlds tends to be direct and, depending on who he’s dealing with and what mindset he’s in (he develops a drug problem in his teens), he may very well take what it is he wants or make jabs at the person who has what he wants. Taani would probably hang around the thing. If she’s envious then she’ll make it physically known that she desires this particular thing through her presence.

24. Is sex something that they’re comfortable speaking about? To whom?

Eh? I usually write them at ages 11, so that would be a no, but when they’re already in their teens then that’s probably still a no. Like, they’re comfortable talking about it, but probably will limit their conversations about it. Even with each other. Sex is something I see them both being private about. That being said, Rama’s probably the most comfortable with his uncles. Taani probably wouldn’t talk about it at all.

25. What are their thoughts on marriage?

Both Rama and Taani, like Nima, have good example of marriage and so they have good thoughts about marriage in general and aren’t adverse to it. I feel like Rama and Taani though don’t think about it much. Taani probably thinks about it more than Rama does, but mostly in the context about liking the idea of getting married one day, but being self-conscious that someone might not want to marry her because they think she’s weird. She’s aware of how hard it is for her to be social like others and, although she definitely improves over the years, it’s still not something that comes easy to her.

For Rama, the idea is nice, but he doesn’t have any strict plans? His teen years get a bit rough and so part of him is honestly just trying to keep himself normalized and not relapse.

26. What is their preferred mode of transportation?

In Anchor, it’s by ship. In canon, by sky bison.

27. What causes them to feel dread?

The fear of something bad happening to one another or someone they care about. For Rama, it can personally being when he feels himself craving the drug he was addicted to. For Taani, feeling like Souma is nearby even if she knows better.

28. Would they prefer a lie over an unpleasant truth?

Rama would definitely prefer the unpleasant truth and Taani it would probably depend on what the topic is and how she feels about it because she can gravitate to both, honestly.

29. Do they usually live up to their own ideals?

Rama is a fairly direct guy so I’d say he at least does his best. Taani does I think fairly well (except maybe for the Rebellious Phase in her life). All of the kainora kids at least try to live up to the ideal of being a generally good person: Helping people, being compassionate, loving and protecting your family, etc. They’re all good kids.

30. Who do they most regret meeting?

God, I know Rama really regrets meeting a few people. Mainly the people who got him into drugs and into the triad business. For Taani, that would be Souma, her eventual boyfriend who’s abusive to her.

31. Who are they the most glad to have met?

Naoka. Both of them would probably say Naoka. Naoka is Rama’s best friend and Naoka and Taani have basically been lifelong loves (you can ask me about that too :3)

32. Do they have a go-to story in conversation? Or a joke?

Rama’s good at talking, so I don’t think so. He’s clever with talking. I think he just takes the context of whatever situation he’s in and is able to make it charming or appealin to talk to him about it when he wants to. Taani definitely not. She’s more of a physical space commanding person. Or sending signals. If she wants to talk to you, she’ll try to get you to say something first probably.

33. Could they be considered lazy?

Nima, yes, but not the twins. They’re quiet and introverted overall, but not lazy.

34. How hard is it for them to shake a sense of guilt?

Depends on what it is and who it has to do with. It’s easier to get over when it’s not someone they care about, but both Rama and Taani have solid moral compasses. Neither of them want to hurt anybody. Rama’s more likely to try to fix things though.

35. How do they treat the things their friends come to them excited about? Are they supportive?

…that depends. Naoka has this habit of getting Rama into situations that become incidents and so Rama usually goes along with the thing because he’s curious, but he’s also like “Why do I put up with you?”

But, yeah. They’d be supportive of whatever it is their friend is excited about (though Rama would be inclined to be a smartass about it as is his way).

36. Do they actively seek romance, or do they wait for it to fall into their lap?

Ooooh yeah. Both of them actively seek romance (or attraction. I wouldn’t say it’s straight up I absolutely love you as it is Okay, I like you let’s see where this goes), a glaring difference from their older sister. Rama becomes a hit with the girls when he gets well into his teens and Taani has a series/handful of boyfriends. (They always deal with one person at a time of course. Neither of them would ever have more than one girlfriend/boyfriend at once).

37. Do they have a system for remembering names, long lists of numbers, things that need to go in a certain order (like anagrams, putting things to melodies, etc)?

Good question. Rama might because he’s more naturally studious with things, but Taani probably doesn’t. If she doesn’t want to remember something then she just won’t. If she needs to then she will and put work into it, but things like names… she won’t bother to remember you if she has to try too hard unless she feels she should. It’s not that she’s not smart enough to (quite the opposite), she’s just stubborn and doesn’t care sometimes. Remembering your name is secondary to actually figuring out how to communicate with you.

Btw, Taani’s lack of remembering names isn’t really related to her autism I think. Even if wasn’t on the spectrum, she simply doesn’t bother unless you make an impression. It may be a little related in that she has to focus more to communicate with you, so remembering your name takes more effort than is worth sometimes (which sounds bad but communicating can be difficult for her as it is). But the actual act of remembering names isn’t beyond her capabilities whatsoever. It’s a semi-conscious choice because she doesn’t care enough sometimes.

38. What memory do they revisit the most often?

Rama probably remembers stories a lot. Stories he’s been told, stories he’s read and stories he’s shared with people he cares about. Taani probably remembers most her first kiss, I can’t lie. Naoka and her have loved each other most of their lives to some capacity.

39. How easy is it for them to ignore flaws in other people?

For both of them, they’re more critical of other people’s flaws, I think. Both of them are naturally more cautious so, unlike Nima, they’d pay more attention to someone’s flaws (moreso if they’re serious or dangerous) and aren’t always willing to overlook them. Everybody has flaws though so minor things they’re willing to get over and leave be.

40. How sensitive are they to their own flaws?

Taani’s stubborn. The most out of all her siblings. And she’ll reflect on that, but only later on when she feels bad about it. She’s sensitive about the fact that it’s harder for her to communicate with people, but at the same time homegirl don’t care at all times. Like, Taani’s this person who is gentle and kind and a sweet person, but also kiss her actual ass.

Rama’s more reflective of his nature. He’s naturally inquisitive and he’s willing to look on himself more than Taani. But he also a temper and when he’s heated, he won’t see his own issues until he’s ready, Likewise, if he’s just compromised in general he may not be able to see the bigger picture.

43. If someone asked them to explain their sexuality, how would they do so?

I honestly can’t imagine Rama as anything as straight. I’ve never gotten any indication that he likes any other gender but girls. As for Taani, she’s probably experimented on some level because as a teenager she was probably willing to give anyone a chance who paid her any flatter/attention, but ultimately prefers men. While Rama is openly straight and would tell you so, Taani’s probably straight, but if you asked her she wouldn’t deign to tell you unless you were someone she loved.

(I admittedly always get a bit nervous when someone asks me about the sexualities of my characters on tumblr because my kainora kids all just happen to be straight? I let the characters tell me their sexuality because I don’t want token representation. But for sure two of my Bopal kids aren’t straight. One of Nima’s friends that I want to introduce isn’t. And I have thoughts on a couple of other characters that I don’t want to say yay or nay on yet. Feel free to ask me about that if you want.)

[crimsonrevolt]

Congratulations Amy you’ve been accepted to Crimson Revolt as Druella Black!

↳ please refer to our character checklist

We adored how much time you spent fleshing out her character, and how you took the extra energy to check in with us about how players connected to her felt about her character and their development to make sure your Druella would fit in like a glove! Your para sample was lovely and we’re so excited to see you explore the plot ideas you have listed -- your Druella will be a fantastic addition to the roleplay and we know she’ll have some amazing connections with players already and it’s so exciting to see that! *your face-claim change has been accepted!

application beneath the cut

OUT OF CHARACTER

INTRODUCTION

Hello! I’m Amy! I’m 18, and my timezone is GMT-6.

ACTIVITY

I’m always horrible at giving activity in numbers, but maybe a 6.5 or 7 out of 10? I’m in another RP, but I can still be on  at least every other day, with more time on weekends.

TRIGGERS

*removed for privacy

HOW DID YOU FIND US?

By looking through the “marauders rp” and “marauders rpg” tags.

WHAT HARRY POTTER CHARACTER DO YOU IDENTIFY WITH MOST?

Ooh, good question. I’ve loved Luna ever since I read the series for the first time, but I don’t think I’m like her at all. Hermione, maybe? I read a lot, and I get very, very absorbed in trivia and all kinds of learning-related things.

ANYTHING ELSE?

No, I think I’m alright, thanks! You’ve already been very helpful with answering my questions!

IN CHARACTER

DESIRED CHARACTER

Druella Black

FACE CLAIM

If it’s still alright with you, I’d like to go for Joely Richardson, please!

REASON FOR CHOSEN CHARACTER

Ah, Druella. Well, first of all, I was thrilled to see that she was available, since I haven’t seen the parents of the marauders’ generation in RPs much,  except as npcs. (I love playing older characters, so I was thrilled to see her.)

I’ve played Narcissa before in the past, so I’ve definitely wondered for a while how some of those family dynamics could look from the perspective of the older Blacks. People have gotten to play with how Andromeda’s departure impacts her sisters, but what about the parents?      

I see Druella as someone whose entire world is based on appearances and doing what is expected of her. She doesn’t mind this too much. She’s charming and confident and good with people, (and a snappy dresser too) so the demands of pureblood society come fairly easily to her.

Well, some of them do. Other things are beyond her control. For example, the inability to produce a male heir. This was a huge blow and source of stress to her at first. But with the addition of each little girl, she grew more and more resolved to… she would call it making up for things, but you or I might call it overcompensation. If her children were all going to be women, then they were going to be the most elegant, most ladylike women in all of the wizarding world.

I also think it might be really interesting to explore how Druella, as someone who is situated right at the heart of pureblood society, copes with its demands and problems. Especially when her life starts to go more awry than she thought it would. Given how important reputation is to the family, it could be really great to play with how she reacts to the shame of Andromeda marrying Ted.

PREFERRED SHIPS // CHARACTER SEXUALITY // GENDER & PRONOUNS

I’m not quite sure how to format this, so I’m just going to do the basics first, then the analysis.

Gender and pronouns: Cis female, she/her. // Preferred ships: I’m open to anything, except maybe incest.

Like most other women she knew, Druella did not have the luxury of marrying for love. Her marriage was orchestrated between the parents of her family and that of her husband. Her role in it all was to hope for the best.

And in her world, you couldn’t ask for anyone better than Cygnus Black. It came as no surprise to her that she could marry into the House of Black. After all, she was quite the catch. Beautiful, smart, in possession of some family galleons. Of course the Blacks would want her. But that didn’t mean she was any less pleased.

But how did they match up, in a more personal sense? If asked Druella would certainly say she loved her husband. Not with a burning passion, mind you, but she had few complaints. They made a good team, and they certainly looked good together.

She has wondered though, just a little, what life with someone of her own choosing. Not that she would ever do anything about it. She likes her life, for the most part. But everyone wonders a little. Even Druella Black.

In Druella’s experience, sex  has been more about creating a suitable family tree than anything fun or pleasurable. In the early years of her marriage, it was more of a source of stress for her. As a result, she’s not quite sure how to feel about it. She’s never been very adventurous with it, but that’s never bothered her. It’s just sort of…there.  

CREATE ONE (OR MORE!) OF THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR CHARACTER:

-A MOCKBLOG

https://druellablackmockblog.tumblr.com/

I’ve never made a mockblog before, but I hope you have fun poking around!

-A FEW POTENTIAL PLOT POINTS

I would love to play around with Druella’s relationship to her two remaining daughters, and how desperate she is to make sure she doesn’t lose another one. I picture her as showing some favouritism towards Narcissa, but obviously I’d have to clear that with Bella and Cissy’s players, haha. I feel like Druella is one of those moms who’s always secretly (or not so secretly) judging her kids in everything they do, so that might provide a nice source of tension.  

I would also love to explore how Druella copes with the fact that people’s opinions of her family might have changed with Andromeda leaving. Status is very important to her, so it might be really fun to see how she tries to preserve her status among the purebloods. Depending on what people think of her now, she might pretend nothing ever happened, or spend years publicly disowning Andy, or even get more involved with the DEs to prove that she’s loyal.

I know Walburga’s still open, but I would love to see how their relationship might work, and how you might be able to play with how they each deal with their children defecting. Would they talk about it? Maybe it would bring them closer. Or maybe it would never be spoken about. (This could be interesting with Orion too.)  

IN CHARACTER QUESTIONNAIRE

The following section should be looked at like a survey for your character. Answer them in character and feel free to use gifs. Or, if you’d rather, answer them in third person or OOC without gifs. Answers do not have to be extremely lengthy.

♔ If you were able to invent one spell, potion, or charm, what would it do, what would you use it for or how would you use it? Feel free to name it:

“Hmm. Perhaps a spell to thin out the mudblood population? If not that, then one to make my house elves work faster. It’s so hard to find good help these days, don’t you find?”

♔ You have to venture deep into the Forbidden Forest one night. Pick one other character and one object (muggle or magical), besides your wand, that you’d want with you:

“I like to think that I could handle myself fairly well in that situation, but given the chance I would probably take my husband — he’s a fairly proficient dueller, you see. And I would take… a mirror. If needed, I could throw it at any monsters. But if there weren’t any, I would be quite happy to use it for its normal purpose.”

♔ What kinds of decisions are the most difficult for you to make?

“Difficult? I’ve found that in most matters — housekeeping, entertaining, even family — you can decide most things using the same method.You simply have to weigh your pros and cons. Look at what life will be like if you make one choice over the other. And then live with your choice, whatever it might be.”

♔ What is one thing you would never want said about you?

“I would never want anyone to say that I… run in the wrong circles, if that’s the right phrase. But I doubt there’s much danger of that.”

WRITING SAMPLE

One of the things Druella loved most about her family was their sense of tradition. Today, she was indulging in a favourite one. When her daughters had moved out, to begin their new lives, she’d suggested something to keep them close. A periodic lunch date with each girl. So they could catch up with each other. And also, though she would never say, so she could keep an eye on them.

Today was her day to catch up with Narcissa. As Druella walked into the little cafe they had agreed upon, she was immidiately flooded with a sense of being watched.  It was a feeling she relished. Where others might shrivel under the attention, she felt the curious eyes on her, the whispers of adoring gossip, and felt at ease. She was about to sit down with her lovely girl, the two of them looking like pictures, and provoke the envy of every soul in the room.

She weaved her way slowly through the tables until she found a suitably spotless one. She sat down, smoothed her already smooth hair, and checked her watch. She was early. “Excuse me,” she called to a serving witch. “Get me a glass of wine, please. Thank you.”  If she was early, she had time to think.

And today was a day where Druella did not want to think clearly.

Because, you see, today wasn’t just the day to meet her youngest daughter for a chat. Today was the anniversary of her middle child leaving the family.

The little mudblood-loving idiot. Tearing the family apart to hop into bed with Ted Tonks. Even his name sounded common. Why? Why had she done it?

Druella knew she shouldn’t think about it. Instead, she should rewrite things. She had two daughters. No third to speak of. No middle child off out there, on the other side of the war. Palling around with heathens in some commune for mugglle enthusiasts, or something.

She shouldn’t have suggested that Cissy meet her today. No doubt she’d been thinking about it too. But what other options did she have? Surely they all had to just carry on as normal.

Just as the wine arrived, Druella spotted a familiar blonde head. One that she hoped would arrive for many more lunches to come. “Darling!” She rushed over to her daughter and looked her up and down. “You’re looking thin, dear. We ought to get some meat on your bones.” She picked up Narcissa’s willowy wrist and examined it. “And pale. Like you’re made of parchment.” Druella lead her child over to the table and fixed her with a steady gaze. “How are you, sweetheart?” There. Just like any other lunch.