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kierongillen · 7 years ago

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Writer Notes: The Wicked + The Divine 33

Spoilers, obv.

I suspect this one may ramble. Or it may not. The odd thing is always when things which have been internally discussed forever end up not needing to be discussed in public. For Journey Into Mystery and Young Avengers, I always had the idea of the essay I'd end them with... but when I got there, I shrugged and did a couple of paragraphs which covered the basics.

(There was a grace note in both, in terms of highlighting a motif – Write Your Own Happy Ending and Be A Superhero. Save The World – but that's really minor detail compared to what I presumed I'd be writing.)

Well... I know it's going to be quite long, as I'm going to include the miniature essay on plot twists I lobbed up to respond to a question, just so I can include some WicDiv specific stuff.

So, WicDiv 33. The “Everything you knew is wrong” issue.

Jamie's Cover

Jamie coloured this himself.

There was a lot of discussion over this, in terms of how to resolve the equation that we'd set up. Where to go after the maximalist nature of Dio's 32? I won't mention the other options, as at least some of them may end up being used down the line. One suggestion I quite liked was doing the equivalent of the ABC Look Of Love album...

...which is this scene of posed romance on the cover, and when you flip the album, you see all the lighting and crew. In some ways, that's what this issue does.

But black makes sense on many levels as well. I suspect the idea of the specific bleakness will confound the expectations a little, but the statement of it is very there. We did say this was our Black Parade too.

Worth noting – first cover without a quote on the back. If we were sure the readers wouldn't have looked at the back cover before reading the book, we may have put Lucifer's “Am I the only one who didn't see that coming?” on there. But we couldn't be sure of that, so we didn't.

Russell's Cover

What Russell and Matt are doing over on Thor is state of the art superheroics. I've loved seeing what Russell's done across his time with Jason, and the idea of him doing a cover was just exciting. It's meant to be the full range of the medium, after all. I was surprised Russell went quite as maximalist as he did, but also pleased. I love this kind of operatic movie poster cover, and it screams Imperial Phase, including all the cast of the main arc. Dio's the hardest one to spot – that would be the black eyes over it.

IFC At this stage in the arc, working out what on earth to put in the synopsis is tricky. You have to throw your hands up to some degree.

The tweaks to the bios are the other thing – clearly we've got to set up the information required to comprehend the issue for those who may have forgotten it, without just saying what the thing is. For the very close readers, even the fact it's changed will be a tell. It was another reason we didn't do a preview for this issue, and even if we did, we wouldn't have released that page. Velocity in reading is key here.

With Woden we restate “She had some mysterious hold over him” rather than specifically talking about the Blakes. With Minerva we remind people that she was tortured on Ananke's machine, and then distract with a :( emoticon.

Page 1

I believe the script for this page and the next is in the trade as “Making Of” material, which is fun. Chrissy tends to choose pages in terms of what's interesting, especially if we have something else to show. In this case, it's my drawing for the design of Woden's Secret Base.

My basic description for this was the Bat Cave, which is a man cave, if you squint. Having an enormous penny in it could have been a giggle. We had to have a few passes to get the lighting right on this – debating the colours on the bars of the cage was also tricky.

In terms of pulling out a detail, the suit of armour missing a head on the right would be a useful one. Balancing the “making sure it's visible” while not leaning too much into “LOOK AT THE HEADLESS SUIT” is Jamie's storytelling problem here.

The main dialogue problem was balancing the level of Cass' response here with her noise at the end of the last issue. Swearing to some degree is fine, but it has to be a specific kind of fffuuuucccckkk last issue. It couldn't be a swear that promised too much.

Page 2

And it's Pink Woden! But he's blue. Lighting, everyone.

Well... There was some debate on the colouring of Pink Woden, in various modes, and various reasons, not least the slight differences in colouring in his previous appearances.

(Issue 14 and issue 21-22, respectively.)

Have I said Pink Woden is my favourite fan name? We use it all the time internally, not least because Mimir is oddly hard to remember. Also, if we get used to saying “Mimir” we may end up saying accidentally in public.

Page 3

I had someone reach out to me wondering whether Cassandra choosing to gender someone by their voice and physical appearance was off. It's something I was thinking of at the time when writing it, and it's not exactly a line I'm happy with. But on balance, I felt it more likely that Cass would say that than Persephone would say anything.

Cass is imperfect in her language in lots of ways. I decided she's more likely to apologise about it down the line and kick herself, which I may end up working in, depending.

(You could also ask “why have anything there?” and that's only answerable in terms of the flow of information and ideas and conversation across the whole scene. Difficult Difficult Lemon Difficult.)

Lovely expression by Persephone in the background of the first panel – in fact, her conflicted expressions throughout. I especially love the reflection of the arriving Woden in the reflection of Mimir's mask in panel 6.

Page 4-5

The challenge here was always choosing where to put the page turns in this issue. What are the big beats. In my original draft the LITTLE WODEN BOY interstitial was actually on page 6, which would change the rhythm in lots of ways – not least in putting the Falling God sequence on a page turn. In the end, we gravitated to this. I'm much happier with it.

(Little Woden Boy works as a creepier punchline at the end as well.)

Anyway, hello! It's David Blake.

I... I maybe should save writing for the reveals all together. In fact, fuck it. Let's drop the ask essay here and we can then talk about the stuff I don't include in it. I'm asked whether you change something when someone guesses something, or how that feels?

****

Oh, god, no. Never change anything if someone’s guessed something. Nothing good lies in that direction.

Why?

Okay, let’s talk – with no specifics – Game of Thrones. If you go into the depths of fandom, Game of Thrones is – to some degree, in some areas – a solved problem. There’s a good selection of fan theories (some of which have come to fruition) which have so much meat on them it was clear they had to happen, or the book would break its structure and become unsatisfying.

These twists are available to anyone who wishes to google for them.

The vast majority of people don’t. So… why change the direction of the story? What’s the point of fucking over the enjoyment of the vast majority of people (i.e. making your story make less sense, as you’re abandoning the already existing thread) for playing gotcha on a tiny fraction of your audience?

(As a quick aside – compare and contrast theorising in a fanbase with actual events in the text that’s being adapted. Clearly, anyone who is watching GoT could have googled the synopsis of the book. Equally, anyone who’s read the books knows the big beats. Does the adaptation change the big beats? If surprise to everyone in your audience is all that mattered, you would. We don’t.)

It’s also worth noting that, while obviously some complain on the nature of the adaptation, most fans of a book generally complain that they wish it was more like the book. In other words, things that surprised them (i.e. differed from their knowledge of the text) were less satisfying. They wanted to see the big dramatic beats, even if they’re stripped of their surprise.

Surprise only matters the first time you read something. For me, any worthwhile piece of literature exists to be reread, and will open up more upon rereading. In other words, knowing the twist should add to the rereading of the book. If it doesn’t, and renders the story less than it was, it’s probably a bad twist – which is one reason why I don’t tend to call them “Plot twists” to myself. I call them reveals. The plot doesn’t contort. It’s merely revealing something in the nature of the world the reader was unaware of.

(As an aside, this means that someone who has guessed successful the direction of the plot is actually effectively skipping to their second read of the book earlier.)

There’s the other side of this as well – not just whether a plot beat has been guessed, but the almost inevitability of a plot beat being guessed. GoT fans have had twenty years to puzzle this out. In that period, a mass communication device emerged which allowed fans to talk to one another and share ideas. This machine would have torn apart any plot.

No one individual needs to guess anything. People can make one step in a chain, and then that step is exposed to thousands of minds. If even one of them can make the intuitive leap to the next step, then it continues. No one person needs to be clever enough to see the whole thing. The internet hivemind is Miss Marple, seeing through the most contorted of machinations.

(In passing, this is one reason why Alternate Reality Games are hard to do, because the mass hive mind will figure almost anything out, almost instantly. Equally in passing, the failure to understand this is another reason why Ready Player One is bad, but that’s irrelevant.)

In other words, the reason why twists are guessable is the same reason they are satisfying. A twist that isn’t foreshadowed sufficiently to give the possibility of being guessed by someone is not a satisfying twist, as it – by definition – came out of nowhere.

To make this specific to my own work. In the case of the biggest and most intricate of my current books, WicDiv, we sell about 18k in monthlies and sell 18k in trades (in the first month of release). That’s our hardcore devoted readership. How many people of them actually read the essays in the WicDiv tags? I’d say 500 at the absolute maximum, and likely a lot less. So for a maximum of 1.3% of our readership, we’d derail a still effective twist for everyone else? No, that would be a bad call.

Especially – and this is key – the people who have chosen to engage with a fandom are aware that they may figure something out. They are trying to figure something out. Why take that pleasure away from them?

In a real way, I think, in long-form narrative, pure plot twists which no one in the world guesses are dead in the Internet age, at least when dealing with any even vaguely popular work of art. You can do them in short-form narratives (like a single novel, a single movie and perhaps a streaming TV show they drop in one go) but for anything where you give a fanbase the chance to think, it’s just not going to happen. A creator should be glad their work is popular enough to have enough fans to figure it out.

Yes, I may have overthought this.

But that’s only half the question.

How do I actually feel when someone guesses something that’s going to happen? Well, this is long enough already. Let’s put the personal stuff beneath a cut…

I’d say you sigh “Oh, poop”and shrug.

And then you get over your ass, because you know all the above is true. Writers are often megalomaniacs who think they can control everyone’s response to their work. We don’t. We can’t control everything. We can barely control anything. We really have to let go. I’ve said WicDiv is a device to help me improve as a person, yes? It would include in this area. I have to learn to let it go, and internalise all of the above. If I can make most of my readership have the vague emotional response I’m looking for, I’m winning.

I’ve mostly succeeded at this. I’m certainly better than I was two years ago.

(I’ll probably write more about spoilers and twists and stuff down the line. I’d note that setting up twists that *are* easily guessable by the hardcore is part of the methodology. Having a nice big twist foreshadowed heavily is a good way to hide another twist behind it. “Hey – pay attention to this less subtle sleight of hand while I perform the actual sleight of hand over here.” In which case, there’s less of an Oh Poop response and more of a cackling evil mastermind response.)

The sigh can occasionally be accompanied with a “Hmm. I wouldn’t have posted that” or – more likely – “I wouldn’t have posted that THERE.”

To stress, what follows isn’t about my work per se, but culture generally, and is very much personal. This is stuff which good friends disagree with me on.

As a fan, I never tweet my own fan theories. I only tweet joke ones. Even my crack theories I don’t tweet, as they’re normally so bizarre that if they actually DO happen, I wouldn’t want to take the thrill away from people. Even in person in conversation I make sure we’re going into a deep fan hole before sharing them, aware that they may be true.

In a real way, the more likely I think something is true, the less likely I’ll say it. As this is my job, I tend to see basic structural ways stories are heading way in advance of most people. I’m a composer. I know how music works. You have a vague sense of what way they’ll go.

(One day I’ll write down my crack theory for the end of the previous Game of Thrones season. Maybe after next season, as it’s not impossible that they may end up doing it, though it’s increasingly unlikely.)

If I had a really good theory I’ve gathered evidence for? You can guarantee I’d put it beneath a cut. That’s the stuff which bemuses me. It’s a cousin of posting major spoilers about any piece of culture the day it comes out. The worst is one regular twitter trope – I’m always bemused when people do a “Calling it! XYZ will happen” tweet. Which strikes me a little like standing up in the cinema 20 minutes into a film and shouting out that you’ve guessed the ending. This ties back to the stuff I wrote above about twists being less effective in the modern age, except in a place where you can control the context and conversation. People may message in movies, but they rarely message everyone in the room.

(In passing, as it’s vaguely on topic – you may remember the research from a few years ago saying people who know a twist enjoy the story more than people who don’t know a twist. Even if this is true – and a single study should always get an eyebrow raise – it strikes me as a confusion over what “enjoy” means. All pleasure isn’t equivalent, and you can only have surprise on your first time through a work of art. That’s novelty. You can have that and then gain the “not surprise” experience second time through. If you spoil a work, it means the “novelty” experience is something you will never have. You may enjoy something more if you know the twist but you can always rewatch it to get that pleasure. If you’re spoiled, the individual specific pleasure of that first watch has been stolen.)

But that’s a conversation of social mores. Really, it doesn’t change anything in terms of how we act… and sometimes, I even grin when someone gets a twist in advance. The machine is working as intended. It’s actually kind of worrying if no one is thinking something is up in an area you’ve set up to be iffy. And… the alternative is worse – hell, there’s buried twists and details in Young Avengers that no one’s managed to figure out yet.

Twist ending: oh, no, I was a ghost all along.

****

I'm pretty sure the asker was asking about the Woden/Blake/Jon twist, and I'm primarily talking in terms of balancing the various needs of the group.

The problem with this twist was less making sure that people didn't get it, but making sure that everyone understood its import. If, hypothetically, I didn't want (barely) anyone to get it, we wouldn't have mentioned Jon after we introduced him in issue 6. Problem being, everyone needs to know Jon is a person who is Blake's kid when they hit this beat. My solution was to just reintroduce Jon hard, and resolve it, knowing that most people would just accept that. Then everyone knows who Jon is, so the father/son switch makes sense.

(In other words, far better some people suspect Woden is Blake rather than everyone going “Jon who?” Especially because the real horror of the Woden/Blake reveal is in its details.)

There's the other aspect to it as well – it's the sacrificial decoy aspect that I mentioned above. Even if guessed, it's a big enough twist to distract people. I reveal this at the start of the issue, so people will probably suspect that's enough big reveals for the issue. Yet no.

(See also: issue 11's dual deaths)

In reality, I was much more worried about the relatively small leap from realising Woden Is Blake And Jon Is Pink Woden to Mimir Is A Head.

But more on that later, I suspect.

Anyway! Storytelling!

There is something incredibly instantly disturbing about Blake without the helmet on, right?

Persephone's line was tweaked a bunch. I cut it as far as I could while still existing. It's a tiny moment of Rising Action, immediately squashed.

The switch to green as the cage goes to full power, plus Matt Wilson's wonderful pixel effects.

Love the Tron-eque light-bike trails seguing into flashback...

Page 6-7

The first date is just before Ragnarock 2013, where we first saw Jon on the stage in Laura's Flashback in issue 6.

This is a “Performance” by Jon, so is presented as such, in the same manner of Persephone's performance in issue 20. Jamie's integrated circuitry design is great, and allows us to go to a limited palette. 8 panel, 8-bit glory.

And Jon Blake.

You write and discover the characters. Jon has barely been in the book – he has a couple of lines of dialogue in issue 14, and that's it. I always knew why Ananke rejects him as unsuitable, but specifically how that would be articulated was something I thought I'd discover on the page. Writing a new character this far into the book is the sort of thing which keeps it interesting.

I was worried it would be hard, or shallow, as surely all the relevant little bits of me are already taken with the rest of the cast? Within a couple of sentences of typing, I knew I had completely forgotten one Gillen archetype.

I realised Jon was a heroic take on Lloyd/Mr Logos.

I laughed. Of course. Perfect.

The 11 days later says so much about how intricate the timeline is around here. It's the day before Baal and Sakhmet made their public debut.

The “She's a fucking weirdo/language” panel is a joy.

Yeah, Ananke really does like hanging around in people's gardens.

I specifically called for Ananke to be in an outfit from a previous God-creation sequence...

Page 8-9

...so Jamie could reuse the masks and only draw Jon transforming, and pull an extra page out of the budget.

The most embarrassing bit here is that I wrote this from my memory of Mimir's legends in the early drafts, and only remembered to actually check my notes at lettering. In fact, I'd got a couple of minor details of Mimir wrong.

(Or rather, didn't grasp the complexities of Mimir – it's very hard to get a take on Mimir, because the main myths we have of him are contradictory.)

Page 10-11

Man, I want to go to Mimir's club night.

In my original draft I wrote it as Jon cutting off Ananke's “Mimir” so that the god name wasn't revealed until the last page of this whole section. As in, it would stop people putting the book down, googling “Mimir”, realising “Heads” and then possibly seeing where we were going at the end of the issue.

I decided against it, in that's only going to be a tiny fraction of readers. If people want to break the flow of their reading to look up facts, I can't control that. Even then, I also knew it would be far from certain that just because they realised Mimir is a head, that they'd then realise others could be a head before the end of the comic.

And NOT including Mimir breaks the flow for everyone else, and is a bit cheap. Better than that.

That knife gets around.

Page 12

First panel: I never get bored of modern blur photoshop to show this kind of effect.

PoV shots are something I adore in comics. The six-panel grid gives it lots of space as well.

Honestly, that last panel with Mimir's own reflection is the creepiest thing in the world, and I love it.

Page 13

Yeah, I'm much happier with the interstitial here. Horrible.

(To state the obvious: Pinocchio reference.)

Page 14-15

I just imagine the tension in this room. Ugh.

I originally had a bunch more written for Woden here, but cut it. It was much better in the silent. He may say some of it down the line, but cutting it right to the basics – the particularly creepy basics – seemed key.

We went with a normal gun. Normal guns were at the start of the story, and have sort of disappeared. Once more we return.

Lots to unpick in all this dialogue, so won't give anything else. I'll say the whole exchange about the machine was as finely picked over to imply the meaning as much as anything else in the book – that's the thing about comics. The flowery fancy stuff? That's great and fun. But the real job is the compressing of precise exact detail, especially in a book which is nothing but precise detail.

I was chatting to Jamie about issue 34 earlier, and Jamie said how much he likes drawing Mimir's helmet. Looking at page 15 makes me see it – the second and fourth panels are just excellent in completely different ways.

Page 16-17-18

Jamie chose the steady angle, I believe, with a background drop, and Matt working the colours to show the emotions.

First panel is where the last of the fun drips out of Cassandra's expletives, and we're just left with something that's really just offensive and ugly. If there's any point where the issue reaches the black cover, it'd be this sequence.

I'm glad they've got here though.

Clearly, this is a Jamie masterclass. Pick it apart, learn. delight. Like – penultimate panel on page 16. The pause, the glance aside. Perfect. Look across page 17. There's a mixture of emotion and sheer dullness and boredom and fear, and how it all pushes and pulls again.

(“And I got it” is something else)

I believe I've said WicDiv contains a recapitulation of basically everything I've ever done as a creator. Mainly the Jamie and me stuff, but basically everything. I realised Laura's arc on Imperial Phase is me reprising what I did in Generation Hope – probably one of my least remembered things, which strikes me as fair – it only landed properly as we inched towards the end of the year. The plot was basically “Is Hope Good Or Bad?” when the answer was “Her Dad died a few days before the issue started. She's fucked up.” Only in mainstream death-happy superhero comics would that work as a twist. This was a bit like that – we distance the reader from Persephone and just show the actions and see what you make of it.

“Try to be kind. You have no idea what people are going through.”

That was the stuff I'd had planned from the start, but it only got more specific as I got nearer it and WicDiv became what it was. I've talked about having mixed feelings about WicDiv's success. Laura's arc is it writ large. I hate that the definitive work of my career is this. If my Dad was not dead I would not have written this book. There is a guilt and anger that is hard to articulate directly there, and is the material I was mining for this.

On a boring technical level, we did a lot of work with Cass explicitly saying facts to ensure that no one in the readership thinks Laura is confessing to killing her family. In an issue as twisty as this, I suspect some people would have.

(The second panel on page 17 is another one – tall enough to have a bunch of half ideas.)

And Laura, after making a breakthrough, immediately crumbles to another mistake.

The “Laura” line is a nod to the song, and one of the lines in the original WicDiv document sheet.

Page 19

I was going to tweak Cass' line – in some myths he's a giant – but that she's musing gives her a little freedom to dance around what we know.

You know, I suspect one reason why Mimir was never brought up as an option connected to Woden is that he's one of the very few Norse myths who've never appeared in a Marvel superhero comic. Or at least I don't think he has.

Normally we'd put something as big as the head remove on a page turn, but it's a physically small beat, so not something you will automatically recognise out the corner of your eye when you're reading.

I love Cass' thinking face in the penultimate panel. Thinkythinkythinky.

Two major beats happening on this page, of course – it appears Mimir is a head (or a robot head, perhaps?) and Mimir thinks the machine does nothing.

And then we hard-cut to what we do, but it's worth dwelling on this a little. When thinking of plot structure, I talk about a few ways to disguise twists. Earlier, I mentioned a Big Twist can make people suspect the twists are over. This is something I tend to think of as a revealed move. As in, you create a machine of logic with a missing part. You add the missing part as late as possible, and then immediately move to what has been concealed before the audience is able to process the new information.

Hence two beats and a hard-cut...

Page 20-21-22-23

Anyway – this clearly had to be a page turn. To state the obvious.

Steady angle shot here, to have the awfulness of it there. I suspect if I’d had space I'd have had the last panel on page 19 be a third of a page, so the two removed heads could mirror one another.

As a minor detail, Minerva's running feet in the second panel of 20 are really good.

Minerva's gesture on page 21.2 is a joy. I know that feeling, Mini.

I really wanted Inanna to be talking from off panel on page 21, but that definitely would give the game away. The problem with distinctive fonts...

And 22 is the reveal on the heads. Probably best not to say much more about this, as I suspect any of the design elements will intersect with what happens in issue 34, so I'll talk a bit about it then.

Tara and Inanna's expressions really are wonderful.

Luci's line came surprisingly late. The “Talking Heads” interstitial came early. The only reason I wasn't going to use it here was in case I wanted to use it later. I decided I didn't.

Okay... twists.

In reality, for me, it's a case of once you've decided that this is the plot, the only way to do it is dovetail towards an issue like this. Any of these individual beats provide too much connective tissue to the other ones, meaning all must be revealed or none.

(You could argue about Minerva, I suspect. Maybe.)

It's been strange writing a book like this – when so much is there early on. Seeing who got what and who didn't, and how people reinforced people has been interesting. That the core WicDiv tumblr community has never really suspected Minerva was off is in some way a surprise – though I've had people talk about that directly and personally. Blake/Jon and Minerva-is-Off-In-Some-Way were the two twists I would guard, but their primary importance was in how they led to the Heads.

When Ray Fawkes told me “There's a reason you're doing all the decapitations, right?” circa issue 2, I suspected that I'd overplayed the hand by having a literal talking head in issue 3... but it turned out fine.

“Played the hand” is interesting phrasing, and telling. Writing something as intricate as this is like doing a slow-motion card trick, in public, constantly. It is a form of constant stress. I have been paranoid of fucking it up in stupid ways, and it's impacted every single conversation I've ever had about WicDiv. Like just writing one name when I mean another or something. There was a hilarious panic when I added ‘Killer Queen’ to the playlist, just thinking of it as a quite funny Ananke song... and then realised there was only one character in the cast with a connection to the band Queen, and that was Minerva. Should I take it off the playlist? No, someone may notice that, and it's against my rules anyway. I quickly added a few other things to camouflage it.

As if anyone is watching that closely, y'know?

That's an extreme example, but an entirely characteristic one. I have lost sleep over it. Even a year ago, I wished I could just get to 33 and not worry about it. When 33 dropped, it was simultaneously excellent (the response was basically what we expected) and an anticlimax (The amount of emotional and intellectual effort you put into doing this is not worth it. It could never be worth it.) I've been telling friends that I'll never write a story that operates like this again. Partially that is because I wouldn't want to repeat myself, and partially because – as I said above – I think twists are less effective in long-form serialised work in 2017, but mainly as I don't think I want to do this to myself again. I'll find some other way to torture myself.

(Spangly New Thing certainly abandons the Scorpion's-Tale narrative model in favour of an intricate character clock of woe.)

Actually, talking playlists... I have prepared something. There's a secondary WicDiv playlist which I've been using since July for songs which speak to the end of year three and the remainder of year four. I didn't want to add these songs to the main playlist in case a particularly determined WicDiv fan worked out issue 33 from them. This says a lot about the high levels of anxiety I've been running on for the last few years on this topic. It would be terrible to blow it in such a dumb way. Now, those reading in issues know secrets the trade readers don't. So it's going to be an interesting few months.

Here's the playlist. Keep it mum. I'll add it to the main list when the trade's out. Don't shoot me for the first track.

You may have seen us trying to prod people to reread WicDiv before 33. This was partially in response to a friend who read 33 before it came out who said – I paraphrase – “I wish I could tell people to reread the series now, because after they read 33, those issues are gone, forever.” She's right – it's a pure ‘everything changes’ issue, and you can't reread the comic earlier, because everything has transmuted beneath your fingers.

Which is by our design, but is still a grim thing to think about. We've destroyed all those issues on the shelves, and replaced them with a new story. On the bright side, we've given you 35 free comics. I suspect this returns to Jamie’s and my twitchiness over comic prices, and trying to make ours better value, every way we can. In this case, we want to make rereading valuable and exciting.

SIGH! This has been a journey, friends. I'm glad I no longer have to think about any of the above. There's huge stuff coming in the final year, but it's got entirely its own character and momentum. The cards we're playing with have fundamentally changed. There's so much stuff to come, but it builds from this.

Oh – I'm sort of regretting mentioning the thing about the third theme in the backmatter, as it's clearly the sort of thing that's going to drive a certain strata of reader to distraction – especially as if there's any number of other themes in the book. The one I was thinking intersects a little with pre-existing major themes, and speaks to the particular spin on them. We'll get to it eventually. Don't worry.

Anyway, to sum it all up, clearly with four talking heads, WicDiv is four times as good as Sandman. That is a FACT.

Christmas Special shortly, the trade collection in January, the 1923 Special in February and we're back with issue 34 in March, with the new arc.

Thanks for reading.

#WicDiv #The `wicked and the divine #Writer Notes

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bad-draft-stuff · 4 years ago

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det. AU 18

Arsé-kun: Arséne: To absolutely no one's surprise, Harley's week-long vacation went poorly. That is how I am starting these notes, and you are not stopping me.

Sheepy: Nyar: Never would have noticed! Arsé-kun: Arséne: We unfortunately started off right as I finished the previous batch of notes, because that's when he dragged his ratty ass into my office while having some sort of bullshit-induced hallucinations. I know it's Hidden Potential based, but I quite literally have "Bullshit" written down, so stick with me. Arsé-kun: Arséne: *he is not having fun. it's, again, too funky for his tastes and it only gets worse from here. he makes a face somewhere between a grimace and a lesser grimace* Arsé-kun: Arséne: That scene was solved primarily through proven medical techniques, but it absolutely did not end there. Randolph offered to help, and proceeded to almost lose all of the blood in his body to a squid I never want to see again. Or stab again. What was that, don't answer me. I don't want to know. Sheepy: Nyar: Aww. Arsé-kun: Randy: Star vampire, also known as a Star Shambler. Arsé-kun: Arséne: >:V Arsé-kun: Arséne: Thankfully, trash disposal came and took it out of my sight. I don't know how the Sir knew about it, I do not care, it is out of my hands at that point. Sheepy: Nyar: He probably smelled food and followed the scent. Arsé-kun: Arséne: You imply several horrible things. *he notes it anyway* Sheepy: Nyar: Yes, he probably ate it. Arsé-kun: Arséne: So! *ignoring that!* Instead of dealing with this nonsense, we- being myself, Harley, and Sherlock- took a case to find a missing pet. That was the easy part. The hard part was escaping a base full of werewolves- *he is unsure about that part* -And trying to retrieve any other animals afterwards. While none of us were injured, that went... Well, it went in a way and promptly ended up dealing with more nonsense. Arsé-kun: Arséne: Partially my fault because I ducked into the bar to avoid angry wolves. But it kept us alive, so it was worth it. Sheepy: Nyar: Yikes. Arsé-kun: Arséne: I counted at least three knights in that bar. Minimum. Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... Right, Sir Griflet thinks you are ill and wants to beat the hell out of you. Just a reminder. Sheepy: Nyar: Oh, great. Looking forward to it. Arsé-kun: Arséne: Something or other about you acting out of character. I tried to stop him but too late I suppose. Sheepy: Nyar: Although, a collection of knights... A group of knights is called a Round Table! ...Just kidding. Arsé-kun: Arséne: I don't know enough on the topic to correct this. Arsé-kun: Arséne: *he shudders* Sheepy: Nyar: Yeah. Arsé-kun: Arséne: Horrible. But I seem to be a quest-source for him, so I can probably steer him away. Maybe. Sheepy: Nyar: You should be safe for now. Arsé-kun: Arséne: I hope so. I'd die instantly. Sheepy: Nyar: Just don't call him stupid or say he's incapable of something. Sheepy: Nyar: He will go after your life. Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... ... Can I skip over the next part in favor of "And then that happened?" Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... I am anyway. That proceeded to happen, and it was a fucking mess, pardon my language. Additional Hidden Potential victim discovered. Aleister taken out of commission and also shot by yours truly. We are not speaking of specifics. I refuse. But I am keeping this gun. Arsé-kun: Arséne: I despise guns. But if I despise strange things and tolerate you, I guess I'll tolerate this as well. Sheepy: Nyar: Why are you keeping it? Sheepy: Nyar: Just in case Harley's hidden potential activates again? Although, I guess he wouldn't be too bothered by being shot in that state... Arsé-kun: Arséne: Because it has proven useful and because I am getting rather tired of being caught unawares by things. Sheepy: Nyar: Makes sense. Sheepy: *Speaking of Grif, he walks in.* Arsé-kun: Arséne: Can you please knock before entering my office next time? Sheepy: Grif: ..... Sheepy: *Grif walks backwards and closes the door.* Arsé-kun: Arséne: I think I have made a mistake Sheepy: Grif: *He punches his fist through the door!* Arsé-kun: Arséne: *sighing loudly* Heeeeeeere's Johnny! Sheepy: Grif: Knock knock, it’s Griflet. Arsé-kun: Arséne: Yes, come in. Sheepy: Grif: Hello, Lupin. Arsé-kun: Arséne: Yes, hello. I don't appreciate the hole in my door, but don't worry about it. What do you want? Sheepy: Grif: Have you seen a dead body? He’s about this tall. Blond. Handsome. Kingly appearance. Sheepy: Grif: May or may not have a stab wound. Arsé-kun: Arséne: If I saw a dead body, I... Would not be sitting at my desk. I have not. Sheepy: Nyar: Gosh darn it Grif, what have I TOLD you about reanimating dead people?! Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... ... (please god, can i have just one good day?) Sheepy: Grif: If you see him, call for me. I will come. Oh, if you put out a box on a stick with meat under it, he should come for that too. Sheepy: Grif: He might be smart enough to get out of the box though. Sheepy: Grif: I assume he likes his meat cooked. Arsé-kun: Arséne: I deal with non-moving dead and mysteries of the normal criminal kind. This isn't my area of expertise. Sheepy: Grif: ... Hm. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Sheepy: Grif: So that ghost in your stuffed animal is actually alive? Arsé-kun: Arséne: That is not mine. That is my son's. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Arsé-kun: Randy: ... *interruptus conversatus* Dead reanimated as in coming back to life legitimately, or the ia ia Yog kind that one Dr. West failed to perfect? Sheepy: Grif: First one. Arsé-kun: Randy: Much less concerning. Sheepy: Grif: By drawing the holy sword Excalibur, so too will King Arthur be drawn back to this world. Soon will the sword be pulled once more. Arsé-kun: Randy: Wasn't he supposed to only come back when needed most?? Sheepy: Grif: It concerns me. Sheepy: Grif: However, the necessary dialogue has been said, so I can tell that he’s returning soon. Is it simply the sword being drawn? Or a worse darkness? Arsé-kun: Arséne: Considering he didn't surface for an alien slug bastard, I don't want to know what's so bad that he might be needed. Sheepy: Nyar: Babysitting Grif. Arsé-kun: Arséne: .... *snrk* Sheepy: Grif: Anyway, tell me if you see him. Oh, yes, I forgot Sheepy: Grif: *he starts digging through his bag* Sheepy: *Grif gives Arsene an orb* Arsé-kun: Arséne: ....? Sheepy: Grif: It’s the Orb of Good Fortune. It boosts your money slightly. But they drop so often in certain areas that I don’t need so many. Sheepy: Grif: It’s a Yorb. Arsé-kun: Randy: ..... I have several questions? Sheepy: Grif: Go on. Arsé-kun: Randy: Why do you have that? Sheepy: Grif: I have multiple. Arsé-kun: Randy: And why do you have several manifestations of Yog Sothoth in physical form? Sheepy: Grif: Because he’s my dad. Arsé-kun: Randy: I. Sheepy: Grif: Sometimes he gets lonely. So if you talk to this, he might feel happier. Arsé-kun: Randy: Yog's ult gnaiih??? Sheepy: Grif: Yurt. Arsé-kun: Randy: Hhhhhhhhhhhuh. Sheepy: Grif: My appearance is due to avoidance of the random function. I take after my Dad. I look a lot like him. Arsé-kun: Randy: I see. This makes sense. Sheepy: Grif: However, none of my draconic features have grown in yet, so I'm not taken seriously by my siblings. Sheepy: Grif: Furthermore, I do not understand humans very well, so I tend to be shunned and feared. This is due to my Charisma being low. Sheepy: Grif: Right, the orb is named Seir. Do you like it? Arsé-kun: Arséne: It's certainly something. Sheepy: Grif: It's good for thieves. Arsé-kun: Arséne: I'm a detective. Sheepy: Grif:..... Sheepy: Grif:....Hmmm.... Arsé-kun: Arséne: I'll find a use for it. Sheepy: *Grif brings up Lupin's page on his menu* Arsé-kun: *it does say detective. this is not new* Sheepy: Grif: Hmmmm... Sheepy: Grif: I see. You seemed shady so I just decided that you robbed people. Arsé-kun: Arséne: How rude. To imply I'd be a purse snatcher or some low life like that.. Sheepy: Grif: So I thought very hard about what gift you would like. Arsé-kun: *Fancy name or not, an orb is an orb. More physical and solid than Yog personally, and much more purple, but an orb is an orb* Sheepy: Grif: Do you like me more now because of my gift? My Relationships guide said that people will like me more if I give them gifts. Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... Sure. I suppose I appreciate it. Sheepy: Grif: I see. We're closer now. Sheepy: Grif: Soon I will unlock 1 Bond Heart. Arsé-kun: Randy: you can just give offsets of sothoth to people in physical form... Jesus christ how horrifying. Nyar, is this the shit you deal with? Sheepy: Nyar: He tries to slaughter me when he sees me because he thinks I'm a mini boss. Arsé-kun: Arséne: No boss battles in my office. Sheepy: Grif: I look forward to your respawn times, but camping your corpse prevents others from farming you. Sheepy: Nyar: Have you ever considered that you have no friends because you say horrible things with a straight face? Arsé-kun: Yog: *unhelpfully from Seir* At least I never taught him to T-bag. Sheepy: Nyar: If you had, I wouldn't be so tolerant...! Sheepy: Grif: Your drops are rare. Sheepy: Nyar: If you want stuff, just ask for it! Sheesh! Sheepy: Grif: No, if I eviscerate you, I can get drops without speaking to you. Arsé-kun: Arséne: No pvp in my office!! Sheepy: Grif: I see... Sheepy: Grif: Can I at least bond with you? Arsé-kun: Arséne: You already are. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Good. This makes me happy. Sheepy: Grif: I can introduce you to someone you haven't met. Sheepy: Grif: *he lifts up Elyan* It's Elyan. Sheepy: Grif: He's a bird. Sheepy: Grif: As you can see, over half of tbe lengrh of his body is his tail. What a fancy bird. Sheepy: Nyar: That's not a bird. Arsé-kun: Arséne: Looks like a bird. It's a bird. Sheepy: Nyar: If it's a bird, it's a waterfowl. Arsé-kun: Arséne: In return.. *he exits scene and returns with Pepper* This is Pepper. He is very small. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Pepper is cute. Sheepy: Grif: Is Pepper related to, eh... Sheepy: Grif:...*he does bunny ears with his pointer fingers above his head* Sheepy: Grif: "Run awayyy~" Sheepy: Grif: Bors Slayer. Sheepy: Grif: If not, he's much cuter. Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... Unlikely? Sheepy: Grif: I see. Good. Pepper is cute. Sheepy: Nyar: Why do you have that? Sheepy: Grif: Elyan's my friend. Arsé-kun: Arséne: So what I'm getting out of this is that isn't a bird. Sheepy: Grif: He's a bird. He's Elyan. Arsé-kun: Arséne: That's what I thought. Sheepy: Grif: He does normal bird things. Like pecking at things. And absorbing sources of water. Arsé-kun: Arséne: Is the word you want "Drinking"? Sheepy: Grif: ...? Sheepy: Grif: Do you have a water source? Arsé-kun: Arséne: We have a kitchen sink? Sheepy: Grif: I see. Sheepy: Grif: I will show you. Come, come. *Grif heads to the kitchen* Arsé-kun: *Randy pinches the bridge of his (own) nose and grumbles* Arsé-kun: Randy: ...a'nhash ya l'nafl-mnahn’ul ult Sheepy: Nyar: Hey, don’t say that where he can hear you. Sheepy: Nyar: He’ll take that seriously. Arsé-kun: Randy: He'll be next on line to break me in half like a kit kat bar. Sheepy: Nyar: Great. Arsé-kun: Randy: I still owe Hast at least three ribs and Cxa wants to vore me. That doesn't even begin to cover what I owe Y'Gonads... Sheepy: Nyar: That’s your problem. Arsé-kun: Randy: :') Sheepy: Nyar: What can I do? Sheepy: Grif: Worry not. Give me your ribs and I’ll deliver them. Arsé-kun: Randy: ... They're attached to my spine and Dad said no dismembering in the house. Sheepy: Grif:...Just snap them off...? Sheepy: Grif: They grow back. Just like my cousin's arm did. It's metal now, but it should work just as fine. Arsé-kun: *I don't have the words to describe the face he's making* Sheepy: Nyar:...Like, a prosthetic arm? Sheepy: Grif: No, it's made of metal, not prosthetic. Arsé-kun: Yog: it's prosthetic. Sheepy: Grif: I see...A metal looking material called prosthetic. Sheepy: Nyar:..... Arsé-kun: Randy: ..... Sheepy: Nyar: Are you intentionally incompe....Eh, twisting my words? Sheepy: Grif: I cannot twist your words unless you write them down. Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... A prosthetic is a replacement limb. What it is made of does not matter. You now learned a thing. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Sheepy: Grif: [Prosthetic Limb added to Dictionary] Arsé-kun: *arsene checks on the bird in the sink* Sheepy: *There is no water in the sink despite the tap being on and the drain being covered...* Sheepy: Elyan: *honk* Arsé-kun: *Randy continues to look like 0:21 of Gamly Gramply from 2016 while this happens* Arsé-kun: Arséne: Are you enjoying that? Sheepy: Elyan: *honk* Sheepy: *Elyan looks cozy!* Sheepy: Nyar: Hey Randy, wanna play "guess the Eldritch Abomination"? Or should I spoil who that is? Sheepy: Nyar: Although, I guess he isn't an abomination... Arsé-kun: Randy: Give me a hint. Sheepy: Nyar: It's a Great Old One and water based. Arsé-kun: Randy: That is... Shockingly unhelpful. Sheepy: Nyar: Okay, it's literally made of water. Arsé-kun: Randy: Oh, that's Cath.. No, wait. Sheepy: Nyar: You're close! Arsé-kun: Randy: Cthhhh...aaaaaaaat? Sheepy: Nyar: Yup! Arsé-kun: Randy: That's a Great old one? I thought they were a minor deity.. Sheepy: Nyar: Well, it's water. Sheepy: Nyar: Don't worry, Lupin. Cthaat's not very intelligent and likes humans. So they should be harmless. Sheepy: Elyan: *he doesn't seem interested in the conversation. cozy* Sheepy: Nyar: They might watch you but their brain is probably just printer noises. Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... So it's a regular bird but water? Sheepy: Nyar: Yup. Arsé-kun: Arséne: Good to know. Sheepy: Grif: He's my friend. Sheepy: Grif:...Ah, my Main Quest updated. I have to go to the lake. Sorry to cut this short. Let's socialize again soon, Lupin. Sheepy: *Grif rushes out with Elyan!* Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... what Sheepy: *Meanwhile, at the lake...* Arsé-kun: Fou: fou? Sheepy: Bedi: Kay, did you find anything? Arsé-kun: Kay: *sopping wet and having just walked out of the lake* sword's gone Sheepy: Bedi: What?! ...B-but what about his body? Arsé-kun: Kay: Just a body?? A rock? A gravesite???? A fucking cross to hang myself on???? What was I supposed to be looking for?!?! Sheepy: Bedi:....I, I apologize... Um... Sheepy: Bedi: His body is in there. I know, because, um, I put it there. Sheepy: Bedi: Did grave robbers get to it... Is it still there? Arsé-kun: Kay: *he groans and turns around to stomp back down the lake shore* Whatever, I don't know. Let me look again. Sheepy: Bedi: Thank you, Kay. I appreciate it. Arsé-kun: *Kay continues complaining under his breath, even as he goes under the surface. Good bye Kay* Sheepy: *Merlin's phone starts ringing!* Arsé-kun: *DON'T STOP, MAKE IT POP, DJ BLOW MY SPEAKERS UP, TONIGHT, IMMA-♫* Arsé-kun: Merlin: jesus fucking hoes *he picks up* Yeah, what's up? Sheepy: Myrrdin: Hey, there's two kids here wiith a sword. Pretty sure it's the sword we're looking for. Arsé-kun: Merlin: What do you MEAN there's kids with a sword??? Follow them! Sheepy: Myrrdin: Yeah, yeah, I am. The girl looks like she's related to Arthur, so I'm guessing she's a descendant. I guess genes work in mysterious, plot convenient ways... The boy's got obnoxious Kay feels. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Just what we need. Two of them. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Yup. Sheepy: Myrrdin: How long am I supposed to follow them for...? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Until we can catch up to confirm that it really is the sword..! Sheepy: Myrrdin: Right, sounds good. Sheepy: Bedi: We should rush. Arsé-kun: Merlin: And ditch Kay? He'll kill us. Sheepy: Bedi:...Hmm, I guess so... Sheepy: Bedi: Um...How should we work this...? Arsé-kun: Merlin: You go, I'll wait. Sheepy: Bedi: Right! Sheepy: *Bedi rushes to find the two!* Sheepy: ?: ...Um, are you okay? You've been following me for a while... You look tired. Do you need help? Arsé-kun: ??: ..... Have I been..? My deepest apologies, dear lass. I did not mean to do so.. Sheepy: ?: It's fine. Are you okay? I can help you. Arsé-kun: ??: I suppose...? I am in one piece at least... I think.. Sheepy: ?: You're kind of floaty. Sheepy: ?: ...Oh! You must be the ghost in this sword, right? I felt a pull to it. Was that you? Arsé-kun: ??: Sword.... Ah! *he has spotted the sword finally* Yes, that sword was once mine. Sheepy: ?: Really? Who are you? My name is Aru. I pulled this sword out of a rock. Arsé-kun: ??: Arthur. A pleasure to meet you. *he bows, but as he's floating, he goes Too far and ends up tumbling over himself in midair. He adjusts himself quickly but it still happened. How Embarrassing!* Sheepy: Aru: Oh, so that's how a ghost trips! Sheepy: Aru: Oh, Arthur... King Arthur, pulling a sword...So this is Excalibur, and that's where Sir Bedivere must've tossed the sword... And by pulling it, i woke you up. Arsé-kun: Arthur: *he looks confused about how he accomplished that* ... Sir Bedivere returned Excalibur to Lady Vivian's lake.... Or so he told me... Sheepy: Aru: That's how the story goes. Sheepy: Aru: But that's where I found the sword. Sheepy: Aru: So unless someone moved it, either that's her lake or he threw it into the wrong lake. Arsé-kun: Arthur: .... *he looks around* .. This is not Vivan's lake. .... How queer. Sheepy: Aru: Hmm...Well, that story's old enough that we can't ask him anymore. Sheepy: Aru: But the story said that he lied a few times before he finally returned it for real. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Then I suppose he did. He was never a good liar. Sheepy: Aru: So someone must have moved it...And you didn't wake up? Arsé-kun: Arthur: Mayhaps I did. If so, I certainly am not recalling it.. Sheepy: Aru: I guess it's a mystery... Sheepy: Aru: Do you want it back? Arsé-kun: Arthur: I would, but it has been drawn by someone new. Therefore, unless absolutely required, I believe it is yours. Sheepy: Aru:...Umm, good thing that it doesn't choose kings anymore! Hahaha... Arsé-kun: Arthur: ....? That no longer applies? Sheepy: Aru: I'm still in high school. I can't become any kind of ruler... Sheepy: Aru: Maybe it wanted Cain...? He's older than me by a few years and is fairly dependable. Sheepy: Aru: But I don't really hear about kings and queens anymore. Now we just elect political officials to make laws for us! ...Oh, I guess you only woke up, right? So when you're more with it, I can tell you about the current world. Sheepy: Aru: Since we'll be sticking together, later I'll tell you more about myself too! And you can tell me more about yourself if you want. Arsé-kun: Arthur: That sounds good. For now, I'm content to observe what has changed. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... Which seems to be quite a bit. I barely recognize the surroundings at all. Arsé-kun: Arthur: That's to be expected, but it couldn't have been that long... What has it been, one hundred years? Perhaps two hundred? Sheepy: Aru: It's the year 2020. Arsé-kun: Arthur: .... .... .... We survived this long? That's amazing! Sheepy: Aru: Yup! I can tell you what your surroundings are, too! They must be very different. Sheepy: *Aru points to a car* Sheepy: Aru: That's a car. It's basically a manmade horse, but it can go twice as fast and doesn't need food nor water. Just fuel called "gasoline". Arsé-kun: Arthur: Then whatever did we do with the horses? We still have those, yes? Sheepy: Aru: Now people keep them as pets and race them against each other for sport. Sometimes people bet on them. Sheepy: Aru: You can also go places that let you ride horses. I have a few times with Cain, but... Sheepy: Aru: Cain gets too excited on them and they panic. Arsé-kun: Arthur: That is a shame. I would have thought horses would mellow over the years. Sheepy: Aru: .....? Sheepy: Aru: No, they're bred to be more anxious now. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Why? Doesn't that defeat the purpose of being dependable? Sheepy: Aru: They don't fight in combat anymore, so... Arsé-kun: Arthur: What about hounds? Are they still dependable? Sheepy: Aru: Depends on the breed. Sheepy: Aru: They're kept as pets mostly. Rarely are they ever used to hunt nor guard things. Arsé-kun: Arthur: .... Cats? Sheepy: Aru: They're kept as pets too generally. They think they rule the household, which they'd be right about. Arsé-kun: Arthur: So that hasn't changed. Sheepy: Aru: Yeah. Sheepy: Aru: I saw a dog with a mustache a bit back. Arsé-kun: Arthur: :O Sheepy: Aru: Cain's roommate has a cat. Arsé-kun: Arthur: .... May I request to see them? Sheepy: Aru: Yeah, I can show you his cat! Arsé-kun: Arthur: :) Sheepy: Aru: We have a lot of animals you probably haven't seen before! Arsé-kun: Arthur: Then I am willing to wager in return that I've seen animals you have not. Sheepy: Aru: Really? Sheepy: Aru: Like the dodo? Sheepy: Aru: Those are extinct. Arsé-kun: Arthur: the What? Sheepy: Aru: Oh, I guess not. Sheepy: Aru: It was a huge flightless bird. It's extinct now! Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... What about bears? I believe that population was rather low in my time. Sheepy: Aru: There's tons of bears. Sheepy: Aru: Maybe not right around here, but there's all sorts of bears and they live all over the world. Sheepy: Aru: You can find a few at the local zoo...Oh, you've never been to the zoo. Arsé-kun: Arthur: What is a zoo? And do bears live in the sea? Sheepy: Aru: A zoo is where they put all sorts of animals so they can rehabilitate endamgered species and let people see them and learn about them. Sheepy: Aru: There's water bears, but, um... Arsé-kun: Arthur: Do they... Do they.... Sheepy: Aru: Do they? Arsé-kun: Arthur: Do they have salamanders? Sheepy: Aru: Yes. Arsé-kun: Arthur: That's wonderful. Sheepy: Aru: They're cute! Sheepy: Aru: But you don't have to worry about water bears because you can't see them! There's probably even a few nearby! Arsé-kun: Arthur: dear god. Sheepy: Aru: Huh? Arsé-kun: Arthur: they're invisible water bears?? Sheepy: Aru: Well, they're so small that you can't see them. Arsé-kun: Arthur: They are bugs? Sheepy: Aru: They're a micro-animal. Umm...I don't think they're bugs, but they have eight legs. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ??? ???? ??????? Sheepy: Aru: They live everywhere! Arsé-kun: Arthur: Tiny invisible ocean bears.... Arsé-kun: Arthur: *looking around, and slightly past Aru* .... What about wizards? Are they extinct yet? Sheepy: Aru: No, I guess not. Sheepy: Aru: There are people who imitate them. They're fairly popular... In fact, "Merlin" has basically become synonymous with "wizard"! Arsé-kun: Arthur: Correct- Arsé-kun: *Arthur is cut off by the Excalibur lighting up and zapping some poor sod behind Aru that tried to grab it. Goodbye, Merlin. You absolutely deserved that.* Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... At this rate, they will go extinct. Sheepy: Aru:?! Who are you?! Arsé-kun: Merlin: According to you just now, the essential wizard! *he's got his hair in front of his face like a beard. Merlin. Merlin. you stop that* The Excalibur is still in perfect working order! Sheepy: Aru:....? Sheepy: Aru: But isn't Merlin supposed to be dead? Arsé-kun: Merlin: "Supposed to" is the key words here, young miss! :) :) :) Sheepy: Aru: But...Vivian?... Arsé-kun: *Merlin shudders* Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... Please inform his partner in crime I can see him as well. Myrrdin is not subtle. Sheepy: Aru: There's more than one Merlin?! Arsé-kun: Arthur: Three. They share the role of court mage with different areas of expertise. Why, does history only name the one? Sheepy: Aru: Yes. Arsé-kun: Arthur: That is tragic. Sheepy: Myrrdin: I don't see nor hear him... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Touch the vessel of the soul. Touch the sword, do it now. Sheepy: Myrrdin: *he touches the sword* --Gghhhk! Arsé-kun: Arthur: I would now like to repeat myself. Wizards will go extinct. Sheepy: Myrrdin: I did it for you! How hurtful! Arsé-kun: Arthur: Even when doing things for me, that has not... ... *processing* Arsé-kun: Merlin: *he pushes his hair off his face and glances upwards* I want to cry, but my eyeliner cost forty-eight dollars... We've been waiting for a day like this..! Sheepy: Aru: Is that why you were watching me from behind a car? Arsé-kun: Merlin: It was! And it seems the Excalibur likes you, so we are not able to do anything about this. Sheepy: Aru:...Likes me? I don't have to become a king, right? Arsé-kun: Merlin: No, of course not. Swords distributed by a watery tart is no means for a system of government. Sheepy: Aru: ....No surprise you like that movie. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oh, but the Sword in the Stone is my favorite! Sheepy: Aru: Really? Because you're in it? Arsé-kun: Merlin: .. That is a helpful factor, but not the cause! Sheepy: Aru: What is? Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... Now, now, if I get into that, it may last all day! Sheepy: *A brunette with a messy mullet comes running over!* Sheepy: ?: Sheesh, you're so slow, Aru! Go talk to strangers later! ...W-wait, no! Don't talk to strangers at all!!! Arsé-kun: Merlin: You're strangely unconcerned that this girl has a sword. Sheepy: ?: Well, duh, we pulled it out! I loosened it for her! So it's "we"!! Sheepy: ?: I don't get why she's gotta carry it, though. She said it's so light! Meanwhile, it stung me a ton! Arsé-kun: Arthur: Is this Kay..?? Sheepy: Myrrdin: The girl looks a lot like you and her name is similar... Sheepy: Myrrdin: And this guy's name is Cain... Cai... ...Kay. Huh. Sheepy: Myrrdin: It really is just Arthur and Kay. Arsé-kun: Merlin: How interesting! He's not nearly as horrible as the original. Sheepy: Cain: What're you rambling about...? You're creeping me out! Arsé-kun: Arthur: Your sister has taken ownership of my sword, so a comparison of my own brother was made to you. ... Try not to grab at the sword too much. Sheepy: Cain: ...Eh?! Arsé-kun: Arthur: It is far more damaging outside of the water. Sheepy: Cain: Gh-ghost....! Arsé-kun: Merlin: *FREE FOOD!* Sheepy: Cain: Aru...! H-how many times do I gotta tell you?! Arsé-kun: Arthur: ...? Oh, I suppose you're right. Hm. Sheepy: Cain: Stop befriending ghosts! They're so freaky! Arsé-kun: Merlin: If it makes you feel better, he's the only ghost here! :D Sheepy: Cain: First that Mordred creep, now...Who are you?! Arsé-kun: Merlin: I'm Merlin, he's Myrrdin, and what do you MEAN Mordred is still around?? Sheepy: Cain: He's some obnoxious ghost Aru picked up! He likes playing pranks on us! Aru always lets him get away wih it, too...! Sheepy: Aru: I don't know, I think he's fairly endearing. Sheepy: Aru: So far he's been harmless. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I can already hear the impending arguments about exorcising the traitor. Sheepy: Aru: Well, um... Sheepy: Aru: Arthur, I need to tell you something important. Sheepy: Aru: Umm... The ghosts at the dorm are probably predominantly people you know because of how close it was to where your final battle took place. Sheepy: Aru: I was so excited about meeting you that I forgot to tell you. I'm sorry. That was selfish of me. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ...... ........ *he was stuck on the Mordred part until now, and he visibly pales* Thank... You..? Sheepy: Myrrdin: Dear diary, today I learned that ghosts can get pale. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Ghosts can look like they've seen a ghost! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Dear diary, today I lost my diary, so I'm writing this on the back of both my copies of Kung Fu Panda! Sheepy: Myrrdin: Everyone was kung fu fighting... Sheepy: Aru: But don't worry, I'll protect you! Arsé-kun: Arthur: ..... Not sure how you will, but you may.... Try...? Sheepy: Aru: I know how to deal with them. Sheepy: Aru: There's one face you should be happy about seeing at least! Sheepy: Aru: Your butler, Sir Lucan. He's a bit stiff but he's surprisingly helpful with homework. It turns out that he reads my textbooks while I'm not using them... Sheepy: Aru: I haven't seen Sir Lancelot, Sir Bedivere, umm... Sheepy: Aru: Well, a lot, I guess. Although if Sir Bedivere's ghost is sticking around, I'd guess it'd be by your grave rather than his... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Lancelot has been involved in some... Shenanigans, let's say. Sheepy: Bedi: Merliiin! Have you found anythi...?! Sheepy: Aru: Shenanigans like that? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Y'know? I think we may have. Arsé-kun: Merlin: And yes. Like this. Sheepy: Aru: ...Hmm, Sir Lancelot looks, um, less... Sheepy: Aru:...Berserk than I was expecting. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oh, this is Bedi. Sheepy: Aru: Huh? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Like this, but this is Bedi. Lancelot's doing who knows what. I'm not his boss. Sheepy: *Bedi hesitantly approaches Arthur, shocked, before stopping in his tracks and kneeling, his head down* Sheepy: Aru: Oh, I see. Sheepy: Cain: Why are you so relaxed about this?! Arsé-kun: *Arthur kneels down to Bedi's level and pats his shoulder (or tries)* Sheepy: Bedi: My King...I...B-because of me...You cannot find rest even in death...! Instead of returning your sword, I lied to you twice...! Even though I returned it... There's no way you could rest knowing your final moments were full of lies... I'm sorry... Sheepy: *Bedi's crying... a rare sight!* Arsé-kun: Arthur: I can't say I didn't doubt you briefly upon returning, but that would not be your doing. I knew my favorite knight would do the right thing. *pat, pat* Please do not cry, Bedivere. The court excuses your sin. Sheepy: Bedi:...Wh-what...? Sheepy: Bedi: F...favorite.... ...Even after everything... You still consider me your knight? Arsé-kun: Arthur: Whyever would I not? Do you doubt yourself that much, good Sir? Sheepy: Bedi:...I... Sheepy: Bedi: I thought I was a disgrace not worthy to be called a knight after my actions... Arsé-kun: Arthur: If I never took any other knight's titles for their disgraces, why would I have taken yours? Sheepy: Bedi: Because I was not worthy of it in the first place. Arsé-kun: Arthur: That is most certainly wrong. I won't hear another word of this until you change your mind. Is that clear, Sir Knight? Sheepy: Bedi: I'm sorry. I spoke out of place. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Accepted. Please do not be so hard on yourself. You've done so well. Sheepy: Bedi:....! Sheepy: Bedi:....I've...done well....? Arsé-kun: Arthur: You've done so well. Can I continue to depend on you? Sheepy: Bedi:....! Sheepy: Bedi: Of course...! If you wish me to...! Arsé-kun: Arthur: I would appreciate it. Sheepy: Bedi: Just as I have lived to become a knight you could depend on...I will not pass until you no longer desire my assistance...! Sheepy: Myrrdin:...Phew, I thought he was a goner for sure. Nice save. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ....? Sheepy: Myrrdin: Oh, right. You wouldn't know. Sheepy: Myrrdin: He's not dead. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Rather, he never died. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Was this your work? Sheepy: Myrrdin: Eh, we helped keep him animated, I guess? We didn't give him extra years and we didn't make him immortal. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Since the soul can remain alive long after the body has turned to stone!...Of course, we aren't going to let it turn to stone. Arsé-kun: Merlin: So, that's functionally immortal but not actually. He'd stick around for you even if we didn't. *Merlin is strangely bitter about this* Sheepy: Myrrdin: He's keeping his soul alive all of these years later from his love for you. Sheepy: Myrrdin: He feels like he needs to become a knight you could praise and depend on and refuses to die until he becomes that... So when you implied he'd accomplished that, well, I could feel him wavering some. Arsé-kun: Arthur: I certainly did not want to kill him. Why give up now when he's made it this far? Sheepy: Myrrdin: 'Cause everyone's gotta die eventually I guess? Don't ask me. Arsé-kun: Arthur: But you're still here, and so is Merlin.... Sheepy: Myrrdin: Hey, we're not fully human, so we're an exception to the rule.. Sheepy: Myrrdin:...But, yeah, you're right. It's kind of cruel, in a way. Sheepy: Bedi:...? Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's hard watching humans come and go. It's hard watching them grow old and their memory fail.. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Yup. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Yeah, if I got emotionally invested in someone and they forgot important things about me? It'd kinda hurt... Arsé-kun: Merlin: That would hurt so much. Imagine that, but nothing you do about it works. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Yeah... Sheepy: Myrrdin:...Life's kinda cruel! Arsé-kun: Merlin: So is the lake twat! Sheepy: Myrrdin: Y-ugh!!!! Sheepy: Myrrdin: Gosh! Sheepy: Bedi: *he appears confused...* Sheepy: Bedi: Did you go through that before, Merlin? Sheepy: Bedi: Don't worry. I won't do that to you. *he smiles innocently...* Arsé-kun: Merlin: .... Don't do this to me, babe. Please. Sheepy: Bedi:....? Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize... I won't pry again. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That's not... ... Okay, you guys do whatever, I'm gonna peel off to go drain some innocent people of happiness so I can hold up my facade of being a functional human and then yell at Kay for being slow as shiiiiit! Sheepy: Bedi:...? Merlin, are you alright? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Nope! *peace, peace* Sheepy: Bedi: Do you want to talk about it? Or do you just want some time to yourself? Arsé-kun: Merlin: This would be the fourth time this month I'd be explaining it to you, hun. Sheepy: Bedi:... Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize. Sheepy: Bedi: If there's anything I can do... Sheepy: Bedi: Please tell me. I will help you in my greatest capacity. Arsé-kun: Merlin: You can start by helping the King and making sure we don't completely fuck up the lives of some cute children. Sheepy: Bedi:...Right! I will do my best. Arsé-kun: *Merlin fingerguns and peels off to go back the way they came* Sheepy: Bedi: Hm...What did I do wrong... Sheepy: Myrrdin: Sorry you had to see all that, Arthur. Arsé-kun: Arthur: I'm... I'm still sorting all of this out. Did... Did he say Kay? Sheepy: Myrrdin: Yup. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Is he like Bedivere, but angrier? Sheepy: Bedi: We aren't at all alike but he is my dearest friend. Sheepy: Myrrdin: No, Grif dragged him here via time travel. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... I feel like that is unnatural. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Eh, it's Grif. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... This is very true. Sheepy: Myrrdin: He was in the lake looking for the sword. Sheepy: Bedi:...... Sheepy: Bedi: Right, he found your grave instead... Sheepy: Bedi: I was certain I buried you above ground... Arsé-kun: Arthur: Poor Kay... If he was brought to now, then did he have time to grieve..? Sheepy: Myrrdin: Nope. Arsé-kun: Arthur: How cruel and natural for Griflet. Sheepy: Myrrdin: It didn't even truly hit him you were dead until recently. Sheepy: Myrrdin: It's Grif. Sheepy: Myrrdin: He doesn't care about anyone's feelings but his own. Sheepy: Myrrdin: I recently learned that he didn't actually know the laws of chivalry. Arsé-kun: Arthur: One of my advisors couldn't read, but I didn't mind reminding him of rules. He had good ideas sometimes. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Yeah, he couldn't read either... Oh, unless you were talking about Grif? Sheepy: Myrrdin: Grif, good ideas? Nah... that can't be him. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ....*snnnrrrkkk* Sheepy: Myrrdin: He follows a guide on how to make friends. Arsé-kun: Arthur: He got one? Good for him. Sheepy: Myrrdin: He stinks at it, but he's putting in the effort. Sheepy: Myrrdin: He gave me a shiny rock earlier and then punched me when he decided I didn't like it. Arsé-kun: Arthur: So it's exactly the same? Sheepy: Myrrdin: Yup. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... Oh, and where's Meril? Sheepy: Myrrdin: Uh, it's awkward. He's trapped in a bar. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... Like a tavern? Sheepy: Myrrdin: Yup. Sheepy: Myrrdin: He tends it. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Unfortunately, I won't be able to visit, then. Kids cannot enter taverns. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Hmmmm... Sheepy: Myrrdin: Well, it's not a real tavern. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Although...kids aren't allowed in or around bars, right? Sheepy: Myrrdin: If Excalibur's passed to Bedi when you want to visit, it should be fine. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Would that work..? Sheepy: Myrrdin: I guess you can't swap to possessing his arm... Sheepy: Myrrdin: Well, he tossed it, so he should be able to borrow it. Arsé-kun: Arthur: .... ? oH, I never noticed his arm among all else happening..! Sheepy: Bedi: Merlin made it for me. It's based after the Excalibur. Arsé-kun: Arthur: I'll have to compliment him when he comes back. It looks fantastic. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes. It's very useful. Sheepy: Bedi:...I wonder if Merlin"s okay. Sheepy: Bedi: I don't understand what I did wrong, but I need to make sure not to do it again. Sheepy: Myrrdin: ...Uhuh. I can explain later, although... I'm not sure that I'm the best person to do so. Arsé-kun: Kay: Since when are you good at anything? *pbbbbt* Get fucked. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Kay..! Arsé-kun: Kay: Gross, a floating Wart! Arsé-kun: Kay: It's almost like nothing's happened, but you're floating and I can punch through you like a wet scroll! Arsé-kun: Kay: And you can keep up underwater now, you ominous prick, isn't that neat?! Arsé-kun: *Kay is excited but trying to hide it. All that upset about Arthur being gone, but he's right here!* Arsé-kun: Arthur: !!! Sheepy: Bedi: Kay...? When did you get here? ..Oh, Merlin must've told you that the King was here so you rushed over! Sheepy: Myrrdin:...He came with us when we went to the lake... Sheepy: Bedi: Eh?! Arsé-kun: Kay: I go into the water one time and you forget about me?? Daaamn, you senile? Do you need to retire, old man Bedivere?? Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize... Sheepy: Myrrdin: Shoot, low blow, Kay. Just don’t say that sort of stuff around Merlin. It eats him up enough as it is. Arsé-kun: Kay: Well, fuck him too. Bastard. Sheepy: Myrrdin: But, to answer your question... Sheepy: Myrrdin: Basically, he is ending up that way it seems like. I guess humans simply aren’t supposed to live this long. Sheepy: Bedi: No. That’s not true. Arsé-kun: Kay: It ain't? Then what's your opinion, Bed? Sheepy: Bedi: I’ve always been on the forgetful side, so this isn’t new. That’s my opinion, anyway. Sheepy: Bedi: Unless you meant on something else..? Arsé-kun: Kay: ... I mean, you're right, but not this bad. Arsé-kun: Kay: Oh, I know. You're so goddamn excited about your King that nothing else matters, huh? Sheepy: Bedi:...! Yes, I suppose so. Sheepy: Bedi: Maybe that's why Merlin left? The excitement was too much for him...? Arsé-kun: Kay: We gotta get you a menu like Grif has. Then you can look back to see what the fuck you were doing. Sheepy: Bedi: Menu? That thing he has? Arsé-kun: Kay: That's what he says it's called. Sheepy: Bedi: I see. Sheepy: Bedi: Do you have one, Kay? Arsé-kun: Kay: No. I can remember what I'm doing for more than an hour, unlike him. Sheepy: Bedi: Is his memory bad too...? Maybe it just runs in the family... Although Lucan's was caused by a bad head injury... Arsé-kun: Kay: Lucan had an excuse to be a moron. Grif absolutely does not. Arsé-kun: Kay: So anyone wanna tell me why we're following some babies? Sheepy: Grif: --Kaaaaaaaaayyyyyy!!! Arsé-kun: Kay: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? Sheepy: Grif: I found a shiny rock for you! And a bird. But I already ate that. Arsé-kun: Kay: Um. Good work. Sheepy: Grif: You can have the shiny rock. *he gives Kay a pebble, visibly proud of himself* I found this just for you, so you better treasure it. Arsé-kun: *Kay looks at the pebble. ah yes. this rock is made out of rock* Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... Hello, Griflet. Sheepy: Grif: Hm? Sheepy: Grif: Hello, Mr. Ghost. Sheepy: Grif: Oh, you're the King. Sheepy: Grif: So I was right on my predictions. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, I guess so! Apparently! Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Bedi: Um, aren't you excited at all? Arsé-kun: Arthur: Wise dragon of the rocks, do you have any advice? Sheepy: Grif: Please remember something important about possession. Sheepy: Grif: What ghost in must ghost out. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... Thank you for the jest and advice, Advisor. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: Ah. Yes. Another thing. Sheepy: Grif: You are weak to salt, so make sure to stay away from Sir Agravain if he makes his appearance. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Good to know. Thank you. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: Hmmm... Right. Your cor... Oh. Is that spoilers... Sheepy: Grif: Well, wait until the time has come to learn that information. If I tell you, it might detract from shock value... Yes. Sheepy: Bedi: Griflet, what are you talking about? Sheepy: Bedi: Will you really hide..."spoilers" for shock value...? From the king, as his advisor? Sheepy: Grif: It's not information he needs until he needs it. Sheepy: Grif: And when the necessary dialogue is unlocked, he'll get what he needs. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Telling someone spoilers is how you ruin a timeline~~ Arsé-kun: Merlin: I would know. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's why I don't share everything I see! If I did, we'd be spiraling into something we'd be unprepared for! Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: I need to prepare for what my menu tells me. But I can’t spoil things. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, Merlin, you’re back...! Sheepy: Grif: However, I can tell you a comprehensive list of every knight currently alive to my reasonable knowledge. Sheepy: Grif: Every knight before you along with Sir Lancelot. The Queen is also still around. Presumably due to contracts they’ve formed. Arsé-kun: Merlin: And Meril! He's just busy with a day job. Sheepy: Grif: Is being trapped in a bar a day job? Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's a job he has, and it's during the day. Sheepy: Grif: ... Sheepy: Grif: But he mostly just sleeps... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Minimum customers, minimum work! Sheepy: Grif: Like making a sandwich by simply eating the materials individually. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I mean, sure! Sheepy: Grif: Do you? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Heck, sometimes. Sheepy: Grif: You eat the meat. The meat. The vegetable. The cheese. The meat. Sheepy: Bedi: Where's the bread? Sheepy: Grif: You eat your sandwich with bread? Sheepy: Bedi: A sandwich needs bread. Sheepy: Grif: Wrong, a sandwich is anything that has a top, a bottom, and a middle. Arsé-kun: Merlin: A sandwich is defined as food that is held in one hand and between two slices of bread! Sheepy: Grif: You are weak. Sheepy: Grif: I will eat your sandwiches without the bread. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Joke's on you, it's all bread. Sheepy: Grif: You weak, foolish man. You rely on bread so heavily you cannot see that a sandwich is nothing without its insides. Sheepy: Grif: You see only the outside and have no comprehension of the inside. Arsé-kun: Merlin: No, I mean a piece of fairy bread between slices of toast. It's all bread. Bitch. Sheepy: Grif:....Fairy bread? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oh, actual fae not included. It's just a name for bread with sprinkles. Sheepy: Grif: Hey Paimon. Define Sprinkle. Arsé-kun: Yog: There are several definitions, but I understand which you want. Arsé-kun: Yog: "Sprinkles" are defined as: tiny sugar shapes, typically rods and balls, used for decorating cakes, ice cream, and other desserts. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Sheepy: Grif: So fairy bread is a sprinkle sandwich. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Basically! Sheepy: Grif: A depression sandwich. So it has a depression in the middle to store the sprinkles. Arsé-kun: Merlin: D: Sheepy: Grif: ? Arsé-kun: Arthur: What is a depression? Sheepy: Grif: Depression. Noun. A concave area on a surface.... Sheepy: Grif: No. Wait. Sheepy: Grif: Depression. Noun. A common and serious medical condition that affects the way you act, feel, and think. Sheepy: Grif: Symptoms: Mood swings, sadness, pain, trouble sleeping, lack of energy... Eh... Sheepy: Grif:.... Sadness... Sheepy: Grif: Example use: "Merlin has depression". Arsé-kun: Merlin: I came here to have a good time and I am feeling SO attacked right now! Arsé-kun: Arthur: Um. Yes, thank you. Sheepy: Grif: Congratulations. Sheepy: Grif: Merlin. Sheepy: Grif: Are you ready for a gift? Arsé-kun: Merlin: is it a rock. Sheepy: Grif: Behold. A book. Sheepy: *Merlin receives a picture book of frogs.* Sheepy: Grif: It's a book on frogs. I bought it for you because you're like a frog so you might find comfort in seeing frogs. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I don't get it at all, but thanks! Arsé-kun: *slight bond increase* Sheepy: Grif: You look around for mates, you get disoriented by bright lights, you sing, and you eat the occasional fly. ....Ha. Ha. Ha. The last one is a joke. Sheepy: Grif: Ha. Ha. Ha. Arsé-kun: *Arthur quietly laughs. Joke approved by the King* Sheepy: Grif: Do you like things? Tell me these things. Sheepy: Grif: I read that you will like me and be my friend if I give you gifts. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That's not really a good way to have a stable relationship, but hey, what do I know? I'm not your weeb dad. Sheepy: Grif: Stable... Sheepy: Grif: Horse... Arsé-kun: Kay: i want my horse back Sheepy: Grif: ...Buddy... Arsé-kun: Arthur: Related, I have been informed horses of this time period are more prone to being nervous and scared. Is this true? Sheepy: Grif: I miss Buddy... Sheepy: Bedi: Yes. Sheepy: Bedi: Horses aren't used in combat anymore so they don't need as much courage. Arsé-kun: Arthur: That means horses have a lower mortality rate, then! Sheepy: Grif:....Oh, so I've been doing friendships wrong...Friends are too hard to make. I don't get it... Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose so...but if they break a leg while running races, they put them down. Sheepy: Grif: If I run out of gifts, nobody will be my friend anymore is the end result of giving gifts to boost bond points, hm. How do I make friends... Arsé-kun: Arthur: Down where? Sheepy: Bedi: Um... Sheepy: Bedi: They put them down, as in they put them to sleep with...Oh, right, you don't know about that. They kill them. Arsé-kun: Arthur: whhhhhhhhAT Sheepy: Bedi: Horses can't recover from it and it's excruciatingly painful, so... Sheepy: Bedi: They're killed. Arsé-kun: Kay: :v Sheepy: Grif: Buddy... Sheepy: Grif: I miss Buddy... Arsé-kun: Kay: Then ask your dad of magic to get your damn horse! Sheepy: Grif: Uh...But... Sheepy: Grif: It's different than us coming here. Arsé-kun: Kay: That horse has seen some shit. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: He'd been with me since the day I begged the King to let me become a knight... Sheepy: Grif: Merlin. You must teach me how to make friends later. Okay? Arsé-kun: Merlin: I can try, but I'm better at one night stands. Sheepy: Grif: I don't want that. Sheepy: Grif: I don't care about that. Sheepy: Grif: My Charisma is very low. My Charm is high. That is how I got a wife. Sheepy: Grif: I don't need your Charm boosts. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oh, but you need the Charisma to back up the Charm! You can't rely 100% on a charm working without a stat to back it up! Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Give me your Charisma. Arsé-kun: Merlin: You can't just HAVE my charisma! You're not an incubus! Sheepy: Grif: Teach me. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Why don't you ask your orb dad? I mean, he managed to have you, so he's gotta have some charisma, yeah? Sheepy: Grif: ? Sheepy: Grif: So you don't have enough charisma to teach me charisma? Arsé-kun: Merlin: What's your charisma now? Sheepy: Grif: 2. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... How much would you need, theoretically, to charm the pants off a stranger you've never met? Sheepy: Grif: Uh... Sheepy: Grif: 8. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... Out of ten? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Come back when you're at 5. I can probably give you a boost from there. Sheepy: Grif: I consume Charisma books but get no buff. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Griflet, buddy. You need to read them. Eating them isn't very sexy of you. Sheepy: Grif: My wife loved me at first sight due to my high Charm, so I must be innately sexy. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That's called a preference. Sheepy: Grif: No. My Charm is 7. Arsé-kun: Merlin: No wonder even muggles accept you so easily. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: I am like the man with a mysterious, otherwordly feel who immediately catches your eye due to my high charm. Arsé-kun: Merlin: But then you start speaking. Sheepy: Grif: But my charisma is low, so once someone interacts with me, I have difficulties knowing what to say and find myself stressed. Arsé-kun: Kay: That sounds like a personal problem! Sheepy: Grif: You're easy to talk to because you don't expect high charisma from me. Arsé-kun: Kay: Why would I? You're the guy who I spotted eating a chicken in my yard at 6 am. I liked that chicken. Sheepy: Grif: It tasted good... Arsé-kun: Kay: You ate Tiffany! Raw! Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Kay: I had to tell Wart a fox got her, you prick! Arsé-kun: Kay: I woulda gotten my ass WHOOPED if I told him I saw some sorta goblin bastard, and then dragged to church or some crap! Sheepy: Grif: Hmm. Sheepy: Grif: Well, I only ate one of your chickens. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... What is wrong with you? Sheepy: Grif: The only adult human figure in my life as a child was my mom, who abandoned me. So, of course when I learned from my dragom dad that dragons steal and consume livestock, I'd steal and consume livestock. Sheepy: Grif: The only adult human figure in my life as a child was my mom, who abandoned me. So, of course when I learned from my dragom dad that dragons steal and consume livestock, I'd steal and consume livestock. Sheepy: Grif: And eat what else I found. Sheepy: Grif: I stopped because I eventually got free food as a knight. Arsé-kun: Kay: Which you're welcome for, by the way, you ungrateful bastard! Sheepy: Grif:? Sheepy: Grif: All knights did, right? Sheepy: Grif: So why do I have to thank you? Arsé-kun: Kay: .... So anyway, are we there yet?? Sheepy: Grif: Why? Sheepy: Aru: Very close, yeah! Arsé-kun: Kay: How close, from "we can see it" to "it's only close to a giant"? Sheepy: Grif: I see. You dodge to question because you fear my response. Sheepy: Aru: We should see it...Oh, there it is! Sheepy: Grif: *stare* Arsé-kun: Merlin: This place gives me some bad juju. Sheepy: Grif: I will slay all ghosts. Sheepy: Myrrdin:....Yikes, I hate it here. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... It's like... ... Excuse me, you did mention Mordred, but how many other spirits are here, exactly? Sheepy: Cain: Too many! Sheepy: Aru: Sorry, I don't know the exact number. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's like a graveyard in here. Sheepy: Aru: Yes, that's accurate. Sheepy: Bedi: But why? Sheepy: Bedi: Why can't they pass on...? Sheepy: Aru: We're here! Arsé-kun: Kay: What are you nerds talking about?? Sheepy: Grif: Ghosts. Arsé-kun: Kay: Oh, is that it? It's that simple? Arsé-kun: *Kay turns to Arthur to try and be witty at him, but Arthur seems to be asleep right there, still in midair. Advantages to ghost.* Sheepy: Cain: Simple...? It's terrifying...! Sheepy: *In the bg, there's a blond shoving a man in a white suit into mud while cackling...* Sheepy: Aru: Mordred, stop bullying Lucan! We've talked about this! If you're bored and we're not around, do your share of the chores! Sheepy: Mordred: Gosh, you're dull! If I was king, people wouldn't have chores! But APPARENTLY Gawain's a better- Oh, hey, that's the king sword! I want that! Gimme, gimme! It's no fair that my descendents get to be king but I don't! Sheepy: Aru: What are you suppose to say? Sheepy: Mordred: Please, cheese! ...Schmease, whatever! I don't have to say please to you! Gimme the sword!!! Sheepy: Aru: *Stare* Sheepy: Mordred: *whine* ...Please. Sheepy: Aru: No. Sheepy: Mordred: Gosh, you're the WORST great great... etc, grandkid! More like UNGREAT grandkid!!! Heh! Arsé-kun: Kay: .... I'm pretty sure I lost more smarts hearing that than all of my drinking! You're not even funny, shut up! You're More Dreadful than the Cath Palug! Arsé-kun: Kay: You look like you crawled out of a children's book about goblins and you sound like it too! Arsé-kun: *Arthur continues pretending to sleep to avoid having to actually face Mordred for any reason. noooope* Arsé-kun: Kay: You can pull out a dictionary to define the word "goblin" and it'll just have a mirror! Sheepy: Mordred: Oh, shut up! At least I wasn’t gonna sit in the shadow of some trashy king forever! Meanwhile you just accepted your place as some servant to him despite being older. You’re such a wimp! Gosh! Arsé-kun: Kay: I wouldn't trust you with money! I'd rather fuck a dragon than trust you with money! Sheepy: Mordred: Psh! Like you’d trust Gawain any more with it! Sheepy: Mordred: Like, why Gawain of all people?! Arsé-kun: Kay: Oh what's he gonna do? Buy some more hookers?? At least he's honest! Sheepy: Aru: If Gawain was next in line, why didn’t you just target him instead? Whittle down all of Arthur’s next in lines until it came to you. Arsé-kun: Kay: You! I like you. You have a brain bigger than a squirrel's. Sheepy: Mordred: *thinking math lady* Sheepy: Mordred: ........... Sheepy: Aru: Thank you. I didn’t catch your name. My name is Aru and this is Cain. You are...? Arsé-kun: *Kay pauses to introduce himself, and then goes back to insulting Mordred. yknow the usual* Sheepy: Mordred: Y’mean I could’a just... What the heck?! Mom didn’t tell me that! Gosh, nobody tells me ANYTHING in this house!!! Arsé-kun: Kay: Gee, wonder why! It's almost like you're a tattletail pussy snitch! Sheepy: Mordred: Mom told me to kill Arthur to become king...!!! Seriously, why did nobody think to tell me to go for Gawain instead?! Arsé-kun: Kay: Because you'd have been like "HM NO IM STUBBORN HURRRRR". Arsé-kun: Kay: Grif, give me a weapon to stab this bitch with. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: *Grif pulls out a Christmas themed chainsaw* Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Grif, what is that? Sheepy: Grif: It plays Deck the Halls when you rev it. Arsé-kun: Kay: But does it hit ghosts? Sheepy: Grif: Deck the halls with blood and gore-y, fa la la la la, la la la la. Sheepy: Grif: It was used to exorcise the Ghost of Christmas End. Arsé-kun: Kay: Don't care, how does it work Sheepy: Grif: Which, as the name implies, slaughters to end Christmas due to being trapped next to a shopping mall and having to listen to Christmas music from October to December every year for over thirty years. Sheepy: Grif: Brrrr, brrr. Sheepy: Grif: And then slice, slice. Sheepy: Grif: Understand? Sheepy: Mordred: Hey, Grif, I’ll give you an apple not to exorcise me...!!! Sheepy: Grif: ..... Sheepy: Grif: ............. Sheepy: Grif: Two. Arsé-kun: Kay: You heard the man! Two or perish! Sheepy: Mordred: I’m not made of money! Merlin, I’m being tormented in my OWN HOME! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yeah? What do you want me to do about it? Sheepy: Mordred: Stop them. Arsé-kun: Merlin: And fuckin' die?? Sheepy: Mordred: Sure, whatever! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Lady Aru, your ghost is bullying me. Sheepy: Aru: He bullies everyone. Sheepy: Aru: ... Sheepy: Aru: Mordred, you’re grounded. Sheepy: Mordred: The heck?! You can’t ground me! I’m older than you! I should be able to ground you! Arsé-kun: Kay: You're grounded. Sheepy: Mordred: You’re the worst uncle ever! Arsé-kun: Kay: At least I'm not Merlin! Sheepy: Mordred: Merlin’s no uncle! Arsé-kun: Kay: I'm still better than he is. Sheepy: Mordred: No! Arsé-kun: Merlin: get positively DUNKED ON, Kay! eat my dust! Arsé-kun: Kay: ??? ??? ??? ?? Sheepy: Mordred: Yeah! Arsé-kun: Arthur: *IF I MOVE SLOWLY ENOUGH AND DON'T LOOK AT MORDRED, HE WILL NOT SEE ME* Sheepy: Mordred: ...Hey! Sheepy: Mordred: Why’s he here?! You absolute traitor! You brought him here, didn’t you?! Sheepy: Aru: Of all the objects he’d be attached to, which do you think it’d be? Sheepy: Mordred: *blank stare* Sheepy: Mordred: His crown, ‘cuz he cared way more about being a dumb, useless king than a dad! Yup, nailed it! Gosh, I’m a geniu- Sheepy: Aru: Do you see a crown on me? Sheepy: Mordred: ...Eh... Sheepy: Mordred: Whatever! Go away, old man, this is my kingdom! You can’t stay here! Arsé-kun: Arthur: ...... *he slowly turns his head to look at Mordred* .... As if I have much of a choice? I go where the Excalibur goes. Now please stop speaking to me. Sheepy: Mordred: Gosh! It's not like you even talked to me anyway! Man, you stink! Sheepy: Cain: As if Mordred could get any more annoying... Why do we have to live here...? Sheepy: Aru: I'm sorry for his behavior, Arthur. I'll deal with him later. Arsé-kun: Arthur: It's.... It's fine, I didn't expect much else.. Sheepy: Mordred: "Deal with me later"??? Sheepy: Aru: We have a bunch of chores that need doing anyway. Sheepy: Mordred: You're the WORST Aru!! Gosh! Any cool descendant of mine would be gushing about how handsome and awesome I am...!! You just order me around and bully me! Sheepy: Grif: Hm. Sheepy: Grif: I see. I am piecing everything together. Arsé-kun: Kay: You wanna share with us? Or is it "spoiler"? Sheepy: Grif: So Morfred is the illegitimate son of the King and tried to steal the throne because his existence is a blotch on the King's good name and therefore Sir Gawain, the eldest of the King's nephews, was going to get the throne after the King's death. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... Morfred. I mean, yeah basically, but... Sheepy: Grif: But Mordred ended up destroying Camelot instead because he killed the King, died, and presumably all heirs were killed as well. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... I'm sorry? Excuse me? *he has stopped and turned all the way around to face Griflet* What did you just say? The first section only. Sheepy: Grif: Morfred wanted to become king. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Not that part. Sheepy: Grif: Oh. Sheepy: Grif: Clearly, Camelot fell. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... There was no one left..? Sheepy: Bedi: Every single one of your heirs was killed by Sir Lancelot with the exception of Sir Gaheris, who died previously, as you may know.. Arsé-kun: Arthur: All of them?? Sheepy: Bedi: Yes. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... So why didn't you take it up? Sheepy: Bedi:...? Sheepy: Bedi: I am just your lowly knight. Nothing more. Arsé-kun: Arthur: What did I say about things like that? Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize. I spoke too harshly. Sheepy: Bedi: However... Sheepy: Bedi: Every single one of your knights would have been better suited to follow in your stead than myself, perhaps even Mordred included. You may consider it self-deprecation, but my skill set, as limited as it is, is not suited for giving orders. Only following them to my finest ability. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... I will permit this. Arsé-kun: Arthur: I understand. If nothing could be done, then that is simply how it was. Sheepy: Bedi: Sir Lancelot and the Queen survived. I stayed at the same monestary with Sir Lancelot for a while.. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Lancelot, huh.... Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... I'd love to get his side of things, but that's unlikely, huh. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, he visits the bar occasionally. Sheepy: Bedi: He's shy due to his appearance, though. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... ? Sheepy: Bedi: He lost most of his muscle mass and looks, well... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Like a trash peasant. Sheepy: Bedi:...The Queen, however, is still very beautiful! Arsé-kun: Merlin: And she fuckin' lifts! She's got Lancelot's armor and it looks GOOD! Sheepy: Grif: I like the Queen. Sometimes she wears green. Green is my favorite color. Like apples. Arsé-kun: Kay: I don't know if anyone else notices, but it's goddamn cold out here! Sheepy: Grif: One time the Queen smiled at me. Nobody ever smiles at me. I like the Queen. She's nice. Sheepy: Bedi: That's nice, Grif... Sheepy: Grif: Yes. I like the King too. He liked the gift I gave him. Nobody ever likes the gifts I give them. Arsé-kun: Kay: *mr no manners* I am going inside your home now! Because it's fucking cold! Goodbye! Sheepy: Aru: Oh, right, it is...! Sheepy: Grif:....?! Sheepy: Grif: Kay... Arsé-kun: Kay: It's fuckin' cold! Nope! Sheepy: Grif: If you leave, I'll be cold. You're warm. Arsé-kun: Kay: Then come inside, moron! Sheepy: Grif: Hah. Fine. I have never waited to be invited into a home anyway. Sheepy: Aru: It's a dorm so I don't need to invite you...But we should go in! Arsé-kun: Merlin: But first! *he finally goes over to the other ghost (with the nice suit) on the ground* Do you need a hand down there, butler? Sheepy: *The ghost lets out a weak groan...* Arsé-kun: *Merlin tries to help, but cannot actually hold the ghost. oof.* Sheepy: *The ghost slowly shifts, finally standing... His whole front of his torso is bloodstained...* Sheepy: ?: *sigh* It's going to take forever to get this out... Thanks anyway- ...Merlin? Sheepy: ?: Bedi? Sheepy: Bedi: *he's gone wide-eyed...* ........ Sheepy: ?: Oh? You two have finally come to visit me? I'm so overjoyed my heart might just burst from the excitement! Sheepy: ?: Come, come, Bedi, give me a hug- oh, wait, I'm a ghost, so I guess you can't. Sheepy: ?: Of all the horror monsters I could be, I think a vampire would be more preferable because at least they can go out on adventures, even if it's just at night. I'm bound to this land... *sigh* With Mordred... Sheepy: ?: I suppose that explains how you look even more youthful than when I died... You really got the better side of the genes... Anyway, I'm trapped here, so I've read everyone's textbooks and homework more often than I can count. Cain makes me do his homework for him sometimes... What am I, a butler? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Last I checked, yes! Yes, you were! Now get that cleaned up, you look like you should be a vampire with your shirt stained like that. Sheepy: ?: Give me a minute. *he disappears briefly before reappearing without any stains* Arsé-kun: Merlin: Impressive! Sheepy: ?: Yes, of course! I spend so much time cleaning, I should be that fast. ...Am I right? He’s a vampire? They’re basically incubi, right? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Close. But if I was a regular vampire? There'd be a lot more biting around here >:3c Sheepy: ?: What? Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... What? Most modern vampires are known for biting and bloodsucking. Is that news to you? Sheepy: ?: I meant Bedi, not you. You’re just weird. Arsé-kun: Merlin: He's not a vampire either. My point would still stand! Sheepy: ?: I watch TV occasionally... ...Uh, then how is he... Nevermind, maybe he’s like Benjamin Button! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Wizard nonsense. Keep it at that. Sheepy: ?: Uhuh. Alright. Isn’t that a wizard crime? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Who's gonna tell the Merlins no? That's right, nobody. Sheepy: ?: Huh. Sheepy: ?: Well, you do you. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I'd rather do him instead. >:3ccccc Sheepy: ?: ... Sheepy: ?: He’s got standards... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Are you sure? Are you really sure? Sheepy: ?: ...Oh, don’t tell me. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Okay, I won't! Sheepy: ?: ...Aren’t you a joker! Arsé-kun: Merlin: I'm doing my best, Lucan, sir! Sheepy: Lucan: No, there’s absolutely no way he’s in a relationship with scum like you...!!! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Hey, I'm better than Myrrdin! Sheepy: Lucan: Eh? Really? Sheepy: Lucan: He’s more trashy than you? Arsé-kun: Merlin: He literally got cursed to have a cardiac arrest if he found a woman hot because he scorned a hot woman. How do you think he did? Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... He still has them at least once a week. Arsé-kun: Merlin: He almost never goes out. Does that answer you? Sheepy: Lucan: Ouch...... Arsé-kun: Merlin: C'mon, lets go catch up with everybody else so we can tell you what's been going on. Arty'd probably like to see you. Arsé-kun: *Merlin offers Lucan a hand to lead him in (he's being polite), realizes the problem, and stops to think before taking Bedi's hand and offering it instead. Take the Airgetlam.* Sheepy: Lucan: ? That’s not going to work, is it? Arsé-kun: Merlin: You never know! Sheepy: Lucan: *he attempts it* Sheepy: Lucan:....Hm? It's working. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Sometimes I'm right! All right, off with you lot! Sheepy: Lucan: What, go off where? Sheepy: Bedi: Um...Where are you going, then...? Arsé-kun: Merlin: I wasn't going far. I just wanted to call up Meril! Sheepy: Bedi: Really? I see... Well, have fun then. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I'll try to! Sheepy: Grif: I see. So this is a dorm. Sheepy: Grif: If I were a student, I would live here with a roommate. Kay, you can be my roommate. Arsé-kun: Kay: Fuck, sure, I guess!! Sheepy: Grif: Good. It's decided. Sheepy: Grif: We're roommates now. Sheepy: *From outside, there's a screechy HEWWOOOO!!! sound... Like a peacock!* Sheepy: Grif: Oh, Elyan seems like he's frustrated at his lack of attention. Sheepy: Grif: He can be our third roommate unless you had someone else in mind, Kay. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Can we talk about more important things? Like us all being here, and what this runt with the Excalibur can do. Is that why we're here, Grif? Sheepy: Grif: She pulled the Excalibur. Sheepy: Grif: Do you expect to fight her? Sheepy: Grif: Do you want to fight, child? Sheepy: Aru: You're Sir Griflet, who's notorious for your vicious behavior... No, I'll pass. Arsé-kun: Kay: I mean inside, you moron. I swear, you've just got some apple seeds and rocks rattling around in your skull. Arsé-kun: Kay: Don't correct me. Arsé-kun: Kay: I called you brainless. Sheepy: Grif:....! Arsé-kun: Kay: You can kick my ass outside. Sheepy: Grif: I'll TEAR YOU TO SHREDS! Sheepy: Aru: No fighting. Arsé-kun: Kay: The princess has spoken. Sit your ass down, Grif, sucks to be you. Sheepy: Grif:!!! Sheepy: Grif: You're just too critical. Arsé-kun: Kay: That's new? Sheepy: Grif: No! Arsé-kun: Kay: Then stop complaining! Sheepy: Grif: Fine! Arsé-kun: Fou: *pulling at Kay's pants leg* Fou! Arsé-kun: *This scares Kay greatly, and with a "HELL NO!", more or less leaps into Grif's arms to get away from Fou. At least Fou thinks it's funny* Sheepy: Grif: Hm. Sheepy: Grif: It's Fou. Arsé-kun: Kay: I KNOW that! Get that beast out of here! Sheepy: Grif: Are you hungry, Fou? Sheepy: Grif: You can't eat Kay but I'll feed you later. Arsé-kun: Fou: Fou! Fou fou! Sheepy: Grif: Hm. I see. Sheepy: Grif: Kay is scared of small animals, so I'll give you pets later. Arsé-kun: Kay: I-I am not! He looks small now, but just you wait..! Sheepy: Grif: ...? Sheepy: Grif: So Fou is a kitten? Arsé-kun: Kay: That's the goddamn Cath Palug and this is the stupid shit you ask?? This is, like you say, a bonus boss waiting to happen! Sheepy: Grif: Kay... Sheepy: Grif: I'm perfectly willing to fight defenseless old ladies but I would never beat up a baby. Arsé-kun: Kay: This thing has been around for over a thousand years! Sheepy: Grif: What an old baby... Arsé-kun: *Fou starts chewing on Grif's pants. Hungery* Sheepy: Grif: Hm... I do have food, but... Arsé-kun: *Fou keeps staring at him* Sheepy: Grif: I only have two hands. Sheepy: Grif: My siblings are lucky in some respects... Sheepy: Grif: For example, one of my brothers has eyes on his legs in case he needs to see with his legs rather than his face. Sheepy: Cain: What, kitty, you want cat food? The burnt brown pellets cats like to eat? Man, being a cat must stink... You shove your butt on everything all day only to get rewarded for being stinky with something that can barely be called food. Arsé-kun: Fou: Frrrou! Sheepy: Cain: Here, I'll show you where it is. Cait Sith......Sith Lord, whatever, he probably won't care that you're eating his food, considering how much he eyes mine... Sheepy: Grif: You feed the King of the Cats cat food... Sheepy: Cain: Here, follow me, kitty. Sheepy: *Cain leads Fou to the cat food.* Arsé-kun: Fou: *sniff, sniff* Sheepy: *it's cat food!* Arsé-kun: *A slow bite. cronch. cronch cronch* Sheepy: Cain: Do you like it?....Haha, it's not like you can understand a word of what I'm saying anyway. Arsé-kun: Fou: Frou fou gao! Sheepy: Cain: Yeah, is that so? Arsé-kun: Fou: Fou fou! Foummnmn *chew chew cronch cronch nom* Sheepy: Cain: Oh, good, you do! ...I gotta wonder why. Arsé-kun: Kay: ---I mean it. Shut up for a minute, Grif. What are we doing in the order of business? Sheepy: Aru: I don’t know. I don’t know why I have this sword, nor its significance, considering we elect officials now... Sheepy: Grif: Maybe Merlin will decide that he’s bored and want to teach you. Arsé-kun: Kay: God have mercy on our souls if that's the outcome. Sheepy: Grif: Well, using a sword isn’t common in present day. Arsé-kun: Kay: But it's MERLIN. Sheepy: Grif: Merlin can teach well, probably. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Did you know stingrays have skeletons? I think that's neat. Sheepy: Aru: Really? Arsé-kun: Kay: It's not spinless like Lancelot? Incredible. Sheepy: Aru: Sir Lancelot is spineless? Sheepy: Grif: Incredible... What a talented man... he fights so skillfully while missing bones...!!! Sheepy: Grif: I must strive harder to be like him... Arsé-kun: Kay: Not literally, Grif. Sheepy: Grif: Hmm... I don’t understand. Sheepy: Aru: Merlin, what do you think the right course of action is from here? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Hmmm... Sheepy: Aru: I don't have any experience with a sword past playfighting with Cain with wooden swords... and since we were little, we had no clue what we were doing. Sheepy: Aru: But we don't know if I need to fight. Sheepy: Aru: I'd rather not. I don't like violence. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ..... I've got nothing but the vision of Grif being hit with a chair. Sheepy: Grif: Chair? Sheepy: Grif: I must ready myself... Sheepy: Aru: That doesn't help, unfortunately... Sheepy: Grif: Get ready for combat, Awoo. Sheepy: Aru: It, it's Aru... Sheepy: Aru: And you can't fight in here...! Sheepy: Grif: Worry not. I am capable of fighting in even the smallest of areas. Sheepy: Grif: Walls can be a weapon if used properly. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's not happening NOW, Griflet, don't worry so much about it. Sheepy: Grif: I see... Sheepy: Grif: Later, then. Sheepy: Aru: Maybe, umm... Maybe Arthur is supposed to have it? But he's a ghost... Arsé-kun: Kay: This makes no sense at all. Sheepy: Aru: I'm not sure either... Sheepy: Aru: Maybe it's just broken. Sheepy: Aru: The evil slug in the news died so that shouldn't be a concern. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Can it break..? Sheepy: Aru: Can it? Sheepy: Grif: Its durability is N/A. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Good to know, thank you. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Either way, you've got both it and our King, so at least some of us will have to prioritize making sure you don't get into anything messy. Sheepy: Aru: Yes, that makes sense. Sheepy: Aru: Whom? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Uhhhhh. Arsé-kun: Merlin: .... The only free ones are, uh, *he gestures towards Griflet* Sheepy: Aru: Oh, um... Sheepy: Aru: Sir Kay is busy, Sir Bedivere is busy...Really, everyone is busy but...? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Well, no, *he gestures to Kay* but splitting at a time like this is... Questionable? Sheepy: Aru: Oh, I see... Arsé-kun: Merlin: But the King's here, so it shouldn't be too awful? Sheepy: Aru: I hope so... Sheepy: Grif: But.... Sheepy: Grif: I may have free time, but my time isn't free. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Didn't expect you to stop questing. But our bar can't hold extra guests for all that long, you get it? Sheepy: Grif: But where will Kay go? Sheepy: Grif: He's an extra guest, isn't he? Arsé-kun: Merlin: With.... You? Sheepy: Grif: I have no home either... Arsé-kun: Merlin: .... Arsé-kun: *A notification pops up for Grif.* Sheepy: *Grif looks at it* Arsé-kun: Yog: "This will be your primary base of operations. Would you like to take a tour? y/n" Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: However. Sheepy: Grif: I am no student... Sheepy: Grif: How will I be able to stay here? Arsé-kun: Yog: *peering out of his bag via Purson orb* The spirits are not students either. Exceptions can be made. Sheepy: Grif:......But what about payment? Arsé-kun: Yog: You will get fed and somewhere to sleep. Sheepy: Grif: I see. How much is it? Sheepy: Grif:....Ah, no, I understand... Sheepy: Grif: I have left the tutorial area. Sheepy: Grif: No longer do I get free healing at my base. Arsé-kun: Yog: The Bar will continue healing, but you may need to pay in the future. You will heal at an enhanced rate in the Dorms, but not to the same level. Sheepy: Grif: Pay.... Sheepy: Grif: *he looks to Merlin* Arsé-kun: Merlin: We'll take money or emotional stories in exchange for things, but the healing will remain free. Sheepy: Grif:.... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Anything interesting or you were invested in. Quests? Sure. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Watching Elyan do dumb bird things? Absolutely! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Gushing about your wife for three hours? Yes please. Sheepy: Grif: Interesting...Invested... Sheepy: Grif: Wife... Sheepy: Grif: I love my wife. She's so pretty and sweet...She sent her men to capture me and then her men tried to kill me in my sleep.... Sheepy: Grif: ...... Sheepy: Grif:............. Arsé-kun: Merlin: *FREE FOOD!* Sheepy: Grif: I miss my wife... Sheepy: Grif: My wife would hate me if she found out that I didn't die and I simply left... but I can't go back... I miss her... Arsé-kun: Merlin: We'll figure something out, don't worry! Sheepy: Grif: Hmm. Sheepy: Grif: Fine. Arsé-kun: Medraut: --Aru, look at this tiny cat!! It's so small! *he's holding Fou along with his own cat, Sith Lord. Sith Lord is a fucking unit and not the cat in question* Sheepy: Aru: That’s Fou! He came with the guests. Sheepy: Aru: There’s a peacock outside, too. Arsé-kun: Medraut: Better not let Sith Lord near it, then.. Sheepy: Aru: I don’t think it’s too much of a concern. Sheepy: Aru; It turns out that peacocks are really big... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Useless fact! Did you know peacocks hate snakes and will fight them on sight? Arsé-kun: Kay: So if we ever see Aggy again, don't let Elyan see him, got it. Sheepy: Grif: Elyan might dislike Dad... Sheepy: Grif: He's like a snake with legs and wings. Arsé-kun: Kay: People are snakes except without any of that. Sheepy: Grif: No. Sheepy: Grif: He's probably hibernating right now. Sheepy: Grif: He sleeps in a cave. Sheepy: Grif:...Hm,your cat. Arsé-kun: Sith: miow. Sheepy: Grif: It's Cait Sith. Sheepy: Grif: It's cute and cuddly looking, too... Arsé-kun: Sith: meow. Sheepy: Grif: You're exactly as Sir Percival described you... Arsé-kun: Sith: meoh naow Sheepy: *Elyan's watching very closely from behind Grif.* Sheepy: Grif: Can I pet you? Arsé-kun: Sith: *he jumps down from Medr's arms and Loudly thuds on the floor before fattly wobbling to Grif. Pet him, peasant* Sheepy: *Grif starts petting Sith!* Arsé-kun: Sith: woah Arsé-kun: Sith: Moaaah. Sheepy: Grif: You're so cute... Yes, I can see why you're King of the Cats... Arsé-kun: *Distant sound of Arthur trying not to laugh at the King Cat's mighty decrees. The fact that anyone can hear him means he has once again failed this quest.* Sheepy: Grif: Just don't eat Elyan, okay? He isn't made of meat. It won't help you unless you're thirsty. Arsé-kun: *Cait Sith Lord looks at Elyan with intent* Sheepy: Elyan: !!! Sheepy: Elyan: *honk* Sheepy: *Grif continues petting Sith* Arsé-kun: *Sith honks back at Elyan. HJÖNK* Sheepy: Grif: You're lucky Sir Percival isn't here, but don't worry, I won't rat you out. You're too cute. *pet pet* Sheepy: Elyan:!! Arsé-kun: Kay: Get that bitch running laps! That cat's fatter than Gawain's potato supply! Arsé-kun: Sith: *annoyed* MOW Sheepy: Grif: You're so mean to him. Isn't he cute? Arsé-kun: *arthur laughing again in another room. every fucking time this cat makes a noise. every fuckin* Arsé-kun: Kay: He's huge. He could step on me and immediately break my ability to have kids. Sheepy: Grif: Yes, which means you have more to pet. Sheepy: Elyan: *he's taken refuge hiding behind Kay* Sheepy: Grif: And not being able to have kids... That's just a risk you have to take. Arsé-kun: Merlin: You mean h- Arsé-kun: Kay: Shut UP, Dick Wizard! Arsé-kun: Sith: prraowww. *looks towards a wall while arthur un-dies of laughter* Arrrreow! Yeow! Sheepy: Grif:? Sheepy: Grif: I need better Animal Speech levels.. Arsé-kun: Sith: Arreowrr! Sheepy: Grif: Is something bothering you? Or do you want something? Or are you just feeling chatty? Arsé-kun: Fou: Fou fou, fou-fou fou, fou. Sheepy: Grif:..... Sheepy: Grif: Do you want pets too, Fou? I can pet both of you. Arsé-kun: Fou: fou fool. Sheepy: Grif: Hmm...Hmmm... Sheepy: Grif: I need to learn better Animal Speech... Arsé-kun: Sith: Arr. Thowr. Meaow. Sheepy: Grif: I want to be able to understand Cait Sith and Fou... For example, what if they want to play but I can't understand what toy? Or a treat but I can't understand what food? Or a walk but I can't understand what route? I need better understanding... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Fou called you a fool the last time if that helps. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Sheepy: Grif: That's fine. He's smart. Arsé-kun: *Sith "menacingly" flaps his tiny vestigial faerie wings at Arthur when he finally enters after recovering from a laughing fit. Sith can't arch his back, he's too fat.* Sheepy: Grif: Ah...! *he's figuratively melting* His little wings... He's so cute...! Arsé-kun: Merlin: *he has detected a POWER SPOT-- i mean, a food supply. He decides to stand next to Grif and observe Sith. Real close. just fuckin up in his grill.* Sheepy: Grif: You can't even fly with them...! I believe in you, one day you'll be able to! Arsé-kun: Arthur: He's gotten fatter. I can't believe this. Sheepy: Grif: They must feed him very well here! Arsé-kun: Medraut: He figured out how to operate the auto-feeder. None of us are safe. Sheepy: Grif: Hmmm... I see. What treats does he like? Arsé-kun: Medr: All of them. Sheepy: Grif: I see. I'll keep that in mind. Sheepy: Grif: *he pets Cait Sith* You figured out how to operate machinery? So talented... Sheepy: Grif: When I learn better Animal Speech, I'll learn your likes and dislikes. I can't throw my mats around willy nilly to learn what treats you like and dislike... If you like them, we get more bond points. It's important to pay attention to such things. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Cait Sith doesn't care about that. He cares about eating your food. Sheepy: Grif: My food...Hm, if he asked for it, I suppose I couldn't say no... Sheepy: Grif: Unless it's apple related... Arsé-kun: Sith: *staring* Sheepy: Grif: He is the King of the Cats, after all. Sheepy: Grif:....? Do you want food? Arsé-kun: Sith: Feed. Sheepy: *Grif pulls out a steak dinner and puts it in front of Sith* Arsé-kun: Sith: Arsé-kun: Sith: Arsé-kun: Sith: Sir Knight, I love you. Sheepy: Grif: Ah...! You do? Really? Arsé-kun: *Grif's bond with Cait Sith jumps from 0 to 5. Immediately. All bonuses received.* Sheepy: Grif:!!! Sheepy: Grif: Ah...The King of the Cats likes me... Sheepy: Grif: Kay, isn't he really cute? Arsé-kun: Kay: He's as cute as a doorstopper. Sheepy: Grif: Doorstopper? Sheepy: Grif: I don't think he'd like being used to stop doors... Arsé-kun: Sith: Doorstoppers are... Food. Sheepy: Grif: ? Are they? I'm not sure. Arsé-kun: Medr: No, that's a jawbreaker! Doorstoppers are wood! Sheepy: Grif: Have you eaten a dooestopper before? Arsé-kun: Sith: Meow. Sheepy: Grif: Eating wood doesn't seem appetizing. Sheepy: Grif: What toys do you like? Arsé-kun: Sith: Feathr Sheepy: Grif: Like Elyan's... Sheepy: Grif: I have a few stray ones. Sheepy: Grif: *he pulls out one of Elyan's stray feathers from his inventory* Arsé-kun: *Sith grabs for it immediately. gib* Sheepy: *Grif shifts it* Arsé-kun: Sith: mao! *swat* Sheepy: Grif: *he shifts it again* Arsé-kun: *Sith swats his hand* Sheepy: Grif: ? Sheepy: Grif: No, that's not a feather. Sheepy: Grif: That's my hand. Sheepy: Grif: Ah, I suppose there's one issue in us staying here. Sheepy: Grif: Cait Sith is a cat. Elyan is a bird. They'll have to learn to co exist. Arsé-kun: Kay: If I can deal with you, they can do it fine. Sheepy: Grif: But we aren't naturally predator and prey. Arsé-kun: Kay: You sure?? Sure seemed like it when you hunted me down! Sheepy: Grif: Ah, but I was just going to slaughter you. Arsé-kun: Kay: THAT DOES NOT HELP Sheepy: Elyan: *staaaaare* Sheepy: Grif: Elyan can shapeshift. Maybe he should choose a different form for the time being. Arsé-kun: Merlin: And maybe we shouldn't teach swords in here. We don't need to break things we can't afford to fix.. Arsé-kun: *Sith occasionally meows at Elyan* Sheepy: Elyan: *honk* .......... *generic cat food commercial meow* Sheepy: *Elyan's begun to melt into a puddle. ah* Sheepy: *...a fluffy "cat" comes from said puddle.* Arsé-kun: Sith: *looking at him* No. No. None of this is right. Stop. Sheepy: Elyan: *meowww-- honk* Sheepy: Grif: Hm. I see. You two look alike. Sheepy: Grif: Yes, yes. Two ears. Four- six legs. Tail. Ah, back to four. Sheepy: *Elyan bobs over to Sith, much like a peacock, and blankly stares back with his pupilless eyes...* Sheepy: Elyan:............. Arsé-kun: Sith: [You're still a bird. You're a bird with some cat ideas. It's so bad.] Sheepy: Elyan: [I'm a cat like you now, so you can't eat me nor tell me what to do.] Arsé-kun: Sith: [I am king of the cats. You fool.] Sheepy: Elyan: ....? Sheepy: Elyan: [It was literal...cats have kings...] Arsé-kun: Sith: [Now sit down, you watery pheasant, and make yourself correct.] Sheepy: Elyan: *he hesitantly sits... as a bird would* [Correct? What's wrong?] Sheepy: Elyan: [I copied Fou and you. Everything should be correct.] Arsé-kun: Sith: [Neither of us have that many eyes.] Sheepy: Elyan: .... Arsé-kun: *This does not stop Medraut from coming to pet can number three. fucks 0. cat* Sheepy: Elyan: *meow- honk* Sheepy: Elyan: ? [So I'm enough like a cat to fit in.] Sheepy: Elyan: [These aren't real eyes, they're markings.] Sheepy: Elyan: [What are the main traits of a cat...Eh...] Sheepy: Elyan:....[Socks.] Arsé-kun: Sith: [Cait Sith Lord! Get it right!!] Arsé-kun: Kay: Hey Grif, you ever heard that bird make so much noise before? I think they get along fine. Sheepy: Grif: They're bonding. Arsé-kun: Sith: --- [And I will turn you into litter, so get it right!] Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah, I guess. Sheepy: Elyan: [Litter? What's that?] Sheepy: Elyan: [Do you eat that?] Sheepy: Elyan: [I'm no food.] Arsé-kun: Fou: [They take shits in it.] Sheepy: Elyan: [Like a toilet? I'm not toilet water.] Arsé-kun: Fou: [That can be changed.] Sheepy: Elyan: *blank stare* Arsé-kun: Fou: *stares back* [I have never needed to take a poo in my life. I am beyond such filth. But I can still arrange it.] Sheepy: Elyan: [So cats don't poop.] Arsé-kun: Sith: [Oh, we poop. Cath Palug isn't a normal cat.] Sheepy: Elyan: [You're a normal cat? Really... I've never seen a cat like you before.] Arsé-kun: Sith: [Just because I'm]... ... [Very large and in charge, does not mean I am not normal mostly otherwise!] Sheepy: Elyan: [Ah, so being so round is normal for cats. You're the roundest cat I've ever seen, so I assumed it was unique to you...] Arsé-kun: Fou: [Are you stupid or dumb? Cats can be however cats want. Have you never seen a cat? Are you blind or really fucking stupid?] Sheepy: Elyan: [My only life outside of the water is with Sir Griflet.] Arsé-kun: Fou: [Has he never seen a fucking cat??] Sheepy: Elyan: [They usually have six legs, giant teeth and claws, wings, or other features I don't see on you nor Socks.] Arsé-kun: Sith: .... Arsé-kun: Fou: ........ [An Earth cat, you tremendous cock.] Arsé-kun: Merlin: This just in, Fou called Elyan a tremendous cock. I wish I was kidding. I also wish I had context. Sheepy: Elyan: [I have seen a few... But Socks is one of the few I've seen.] Sheepy: Grif: But he's a cat now. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It was an insult. Sheepy: Grif: Ah...Poor Elyan. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... *thonkang* Sheepy: Elyan: [I chose to ignore most of his features and instead implement ones I've seen in similar animals to go for an aquatic oriented build.] Sheepy: Elyan: *he lifts up a paw* [Water cat. You're the king of the cats so you should know of it, Socks.] Arsé-kun: Sith: [... Otter. The word you want is otter, and they are not cats.] Sheepy: Elyan: [Otter... They're closely related. Right?] Arsé-kun: Sith: [No.] Sheepy: Elyan: [But they're fuzzy and have four legs. Anything like that is related to a cat.] Arsé-kun: Sith: [... Are you suggesting rats are related?] Sheepy: Elyan: [Small cats...] Arsé-kun: Fou: [You are not smart. Stop speaking. I want to injure my hearing.] Sheepy: Elyan: [You rule over many animals. Cats. Rats. Otters. Is it hard?] Arsé-kun: Sith: [Just cats. And no.] Sheepy: Elyan: [How isn't it hard? There's so many cats in the world.] Sheepy: Elyan: [I saw one once. It was big. It grabbed my fish. I wanted to pet it. But it was frightened by me.] Arsé-kun: Sith: .... Arsé-kun: Sith: Must I live with this bird? Must we truly? Sheepy: Grif: Now he's a cat. Sheepy: Elyan: [Do you dislike me? You seem nice, so I like you, Socks. I haven't talked to a cat before.] Sheepy: Elyan: [I did my best to look like a cat. And this human thinks I'm a cat so it should be close. Now as you go about your daily life, I can imitate many of the things you do outside of your royal duties and learn from you.] Sheepy: Elyan: [You can also tell me about how cats are supposed to act so I can try to imitate it.] Arsé-kun: Sith: .... [Fine. I will recommend you ask Medraut to show you "regular" cats for a better idea.] Sheepy: Elyan: [Medraut knows how cats act better than you do? You should know more about cats as their king.] Arsé-kun: Sith: [No, it is simply easier.] Sheepy: Elyan: [Both. Videos will show me how they act but not why. You can tell me why.] Arsé-kun: Sith: [It will be considered.] Sheepy: Elyan: [Cats must have very busy schedules if it's just a consideration...] Sheepy: Elyan: [I saw a cat once that ate grass. It had big teeth and it was huge. It swam a lot.] Sheepy: Elyan: [It had a large kill count.] Arsé-kun: Sith: [Not every animal is a cat] Sheepy: Elyan: [Define a cat.] Sheepy: Elyan: [Your features are: Two ears, fur, four legs, a tail, not a dog.] Sheepy: Elyan: [Not a horse. Not a cow.] Sheepy: Elyan: [You are the model cat, so anything like you is a cat.] Sheepy: Elyan: [Some cats aren't like you, too. So anything that isn't one of the other three groups of furred animals is a cat.] Arsé-kun: Fou: [This is a fucking sitcom. Socks, the snarky cat that just wants to do pet things, and Elyan, the] *makes a noise of Some Kind* [who suddenly appears and tries to befriend him despite being a moron that drags him around. Cats, coming this summer, oh my fucking.] Sheepy: Elyan: [Ah, that's the situation? So like Sir Kay with Sir Griflet. We'll become great friends then, Socks. I can even bring you on adventures.] Sheepy: Elyan: [I saw a horse on the last one.] Arsé-kun: Sith: [I regret my decision to enter this room.] Sheepy: Elyan: [Why?] Arsé-kun: Sith: [I'm a king. Not an adventurer.] Sheepy: Elyan: [King Arthur was a great king and he did both. The more you see of the world, the better you'll be able to rule.] Arsé-kun: *Sith has no comeback* Sheepy: Elyan: [So, will you come with me on my next adventure?] Arsé-kun: Sith: [I will think about it.] Sheepy: Elyan: [Good.] Arsé-kun: Fou: *he looks up to Myrrdin* Fou! Fou fou fou foufou fou? Fou hungfou Sheepy: Myrrdin: Oh, you want to go home, Fou? Arsé-kun: Fou: Fou. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Right, let's go home then. Well, you kids have fun. Don't bully everyone too much, Sith. Arsé-kun: Sith: meow. Sheepy: Elyan: *meow* Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oh, that's probably a good idea. Meril might get annoyed if we leave him alone on duty. Sheepy: *Myrrdin gets going!* Arsé-kun: Merlin: What a jerk! Bedi, we gotta go catch up with Myrrdin! We can come back tomorrow. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, good idea. We should. Sheepy: *Bedi heads out with Merlin* Sheepy: Meril: Oh, you're back. Arsé-kun: Merlin: We're back!!! Sheepy: Meril: I was mostly bored without you here so I slept almost the whole time. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's too bad you can't come out with us tomorrow!! Sheepy: Meril: You're taunting me... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yes, but also no. But you remember my call, yeah? Sheepy: Meril: The King is back. Arsé-kun: Merlin: In a way. We're not quite up to the rest yet. Sheepy: Meril: Rest? Sheepy: Meril: Oh, that he has no body. Right? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yep. I know I saw him have it, so why doesn't he now..? Sheepy: Meril: And the girl with the sword. Sheepy: Meril: Maybe you need to dig it up still? Sheepy: Meril:...That's a joke. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... Sheepy: Meril: What? Arsé-kun: Merlin: That better not be it. Digging it out of a lake? In public? Covering something like that up would be hell. Sheepy: Meril: True. Sheepy: Meril: Who would do it without embarrassment? Sheepy: Meril: That way, it'd look filmed. Sheepy: Meril: Set it up like you're filming a movie and no one would care. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's underwater. Sheepy: Meril: Ummm... Sheepy: Meril: Good luck! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Thanks a million. Sheepy: Meril: I don't know. Sheepy: Meril: Drain the lake? Sheepy: Meril: Illusion magic? Sheepy: Meril: You’ve got two wizards and a knight. Anything’s possible. Sheepy: Myrrdin: I don't want to go near the lake. Arsé-kun: Merlin: You don't wanna go near any lake, but yeah that's fair. Sheepy: Myrrdin: I don't want to even go outside. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Neet Sheepy: Myrrdin: Yeah, I sure am neat! Sheepy: Meril: A NEET is someone with no role in the outside world. Sheepy: Meril: They rarely ever enter it... Sheepy: Meril: And yet, a NEET chooses that lifestyle. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Hey, I'm a people person. Sheepy: Myrrdin: I just like working alone in my room so I'm not interfered with. Arsé-kun: Merlin: You complain then too! Sheepy: Myrrdin: Hey...! It's boring being alone! Sheepy: Myrrdin: What else can I do? Sheepy: Myrrdin: You at least get someone to talk to when you work. Arsé-kun: Merlin: You can just ask! Sheepy: Myrrdin: Sure... Sheepy: Myrrdin: I want someone to talk to but I don't want to be distracted. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Man... I thought getting a hot girlfriend would totally fix all my problems, but instead it turns out that I had to actually go out with her on dates...I thought I just had to agree to them and then she'd decide to stop here... Arsé-kun: Merlin: And that's why we're in this situation! !! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Thanks and good night! Th-th-that's all, folks! Sheepy: Myrrdin: As if you know any better about girls. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Or guys. Or anyone. Sheepy: Myrrdin: None of us are any good at dating! Arsé-kun: Merlin: .... You might be right, but I'm still doing better than you! Sheepy: Myrrdin: Ouch! Sheepy: Myrrdin: That hurts! Arsé-kun: *Merlin T-poses to inflict dominance* Sheepy: *Myrrdin t-poses back* Arsé-kun: Fou: [what.] Sheepy: Meril: What are you doing? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Proving my dominance Sheepy: Meril: ...?? Arsé-kun: Fou: Fou fou fuu? Sheepy: Bedi: I don't know either, Fou... Sheepy: Myrrdin: *still t-posing* Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... *wisely decides to not comment on this. Not His Business.* Sheepy: Meril: What did you want to drink? Arsé-kun: *Arséne tells him, turning away from the T-posing wizards. boys will be boys* Sheepy: *Meril starts preparing it* Sheepy: Meril: So, anything going on with you? Arsé-kun: Arséne: Not too much, thankfully. But Sir Griflet came by and asked to keep an eye on missing corpses, so now I'm... A bit worried? Arsé-kun: Arséne: You know, somehow? That doesn't help. Sheepy: Meril: Well, our King is a ghost now, but he needs a body and due to where it is, his shouldn't have decayed. Arsé-kun: Arséne: .... Interesting. May I ask where? Sheepy: Meril: The lake near Glastonbury Tor. I suppose it was a hill at one point... Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... It was, wasn't it? Sheepy: Meril: Sir Bedivere buried the King there. Arsé-kun: Arséne: Where? *he leans forward a bit* I may be able to lend a small amount of assistance. Sheepy: Meril: The body is now at the bottom of the lake, which Merlin could deal with if he had a way of distracting everyone's attention away from the lake. Arsé-kun: Arséne: He isn't the distraction? *he's joking* Sheepy: Meril: He could serve as one if we had someone else who could remove the body. Arsé-kun: Arséne: But it being in the lake is the issue... Sheepy: Meril: Yes. Sheepy: Meril: Myrrdin has the fear of lakes so he tends to avoid them. Sheepy: Meril: Airgetlam, meanwhile, weighs too much fir Sir Bedivere to swim well... Arsé-kun: Arséne: *he smirks slightly* I'll scope it out during the daytime. I may be able to do a bit more than I initially thought. Sheepy: Meril: Really? You will? Arsé-kun: Arséne: I will. Sheepy: Meril: Great! Sheepy: *Meril gives Arsene his drink* Arsé-kun: Arséne: Hm, hm. What kind of story are you in the mood for? Sheepy: Meril: Anything's fine. Sheepy: *The door opens. Grif comes in* Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oy, what are you back for? Sheepy: Grif: You. Come here. You're my wingman now. Arsé-kun: Merlin: *he looks delighted* Oh? Oh?? Who's the lucky stud or dame?? Sheepy: Grif: Kay. Arsé-kun: Merlin: :O Sheepy: Myrrdin: Hey, how come I don't get to be a wingman? Sheepy: Grif: He laughs in my face every time. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Because you're a stinky herb wizard and because I'm cuter than you. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Hey! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Hay is for horses!! Sheepy: Grif: Horses.. Sheepy: Grif:....... Sheepy: Grif: I like horses... Arsé-kun: Arséne: *he sighs and looks over to Griflet* You'll want his full attention before you do anything. Sheepy: Grif: Hmm... Sheepy: Grif: How do I do that? Arsé-kun: Arséne: What does he like? Sheepy: Grif: Booze. Arsé-kun: Arséne: There's your answer. Bring him some from here, tell him he can have it if he listens to you. Sheepy: Grif: A bribe... Sheepy: Grif: I see...So you do bribe people to like you after all... Arsé-kun: Arséne: Not for liking. For the attention you need to tell them. Sheepy: Grif: Uhhh... Okay. Arsé-kun: Merlin: If he's listening, you can say words and he'll hear them! He's not deaf! Sheepy: Grif: I see. Sheepy: Grif: I understand. Sheepy: Grif: So bribe him for his attention and then talk to him. Arsé-kun: Arséne: Then you tell him as simply as possible. If he doesn't get that, good luck. Sheepy: Grif: Simply... Sheepy: Grif: But words are not my strong suit... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oh, then, like this. Hey, Bedi! Sheepy: Bedi: *He looks up from cleaning* Yes? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Love you! <3 *hand heart* :) Sheepy: Bedi: Oh...! Love you too! Sheepy: Grif:....? Sheepy: *Grif hesitantly copies the hand heart* Sheepy: Grif: Secret magical symbol... Arsé-kun: *Merlin has distracted himself and goes over to Bedi. <3* Sheepy: Grif: Can I handle its power...? Arsé-kun: Arséne: Most likely. It's not like it'll shoot lasers or summon something wild. Sheepy: Grif: Then what does it do? Arsé-kun: Arséne: It's just a modern sign of affection. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Sheepy: Grif: What do I need to do for the [KEY ITEM]? Sheepy: Meril: I don't know what he likes... Sheepy: Grif: Booze. Sheepy: Meril:........ Sheepy: Meril: Um... Sheepy: Meril: There are many kinds. Sheepy: Grif: Whatever type he likes. Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... Not very helpful, is he? Sheepy: Meril: He never really is... Sheepy: Grif: I have little knowledge on such things. Sheepy: Grif: I only have alcohol at parties. Sheepy: Grif: He drinks a lot, so something that someone with lots of experience would like. Arsé-kun: Arséne: So he'd like to be absolutely obliterated? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Arséne: Get him one of whatever the prosecutor had. *he gestures back to Barok, who is #dead in his booth. Arséne isn't jealous.* Sheepy: Meril: *he grabs a bottle and gives it to Grif* Sheepy: Grif: I see. This requires payment, I assume. Sheepy: *Grif pockets it before pulling out a shiny necklace* Sheepy: Grif: The Costly Necklace of Riches. It is useless in every way except for selling. I find them occasionally. Sheepy: Meril: Um...This isn't... Sheepy: Meril:...thanks. *he hesitantly accepts it, clearly not happy with it* Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Arséne: (◕ヮ◕) *HE IS LOOKING AT IT* Sheepy: Meril:...? Arsé-kun: Arséne: I will unhesitatingly give you a second story for that. Sheepy: Meril:...! Oh! Really? That sounds great! Arsé-kun: *Grif's point has been proven. It is good for selling* Sheepy: Grif: Now then. I will attempt this. Sheepy: Grif: I will return if it does not work out. Sheepy: *Grif leaves* Sheepy: *Grif returns home...* Sheepy: Grif: --Kay! Arsé-kun: Kay: What? Sheepy: Grif: I got you, uhhhh... Sheepy: *Grif pulls out the bottle* Sheepy: Grif:...Whatever this is. Sheepy: Grif: yeah Arsé-kun: Kay: Oh-ho! Finally, something good! *he reaches for it* Sheepy: Grif: *he pulls it away* No, no, I'll give it to you if you, uh- if you listen to me. *he's awkwardly shifting* ...Uhh, okay? Sheepy: Grif: That's how it goes...I think. Arsé-kun: Kay: Wh..? *he leans back in his seat, not sure what to make of this* Yeah, sure. I'm all ears? Sheepy: Grif: Uhhh. Uhhhh... Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Is everything okay? *He's starting to get concerned* Sheepy: Grif:...*he's beginning to get flustered* Uh... How do I say it... Sheepy: Grif: *he puts down the bottle and mimics Merlin's hand heart before... putting on a bloodthirsty grin. grif you're already messing it up* I- I- I love- Arsé-kun: *Kay is starting to also get flustered now. What is happening right now?* Arsé-kun: Kay: Are you good? Were you cursed? Did you get a bad status or whatever you call it? Sheepy: Grif: Charm! By you!!! Arsé-kun: Kay: !!!!! Sheepy: Grif: Uh, uh.... Sheepy: Grif: Ahahahaha! Very funny!!! Very much a joke!! Definitely!! Yes!! W-wait, no, no... No, I did this all so you wouldn't laugh in my face again... now I'm gonna ruin it... Sheepy: Grif:....Nevermind!! *he grabs the bottle and shoves it into Kay's hands* H-here, you listened, okay, just forget you heard anything! Ineversaidathing!! *he turns and flees!* Arsé-kun: Kay: H-hey! *he jumps up and reaches out towards Grif with his free hand* Get back here!! Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Oh, for fuck's sake! *he puts the bottle down and gives chase* Sheepy: *Grif, in his panicked state, heads towards the bar... and trips before he can get there* Sheepy: Grif: !!! Arsé-kun: Kay: You didn't even let me respond to you, you oaf. Sheepy: Grif: Okay, go ahead and laugh like you've always done before!! Arsé-kun: Kay: What's that supposed to mean? Why would... *he trails with a look of horror off as he realizes what Grif means* No, no, wait, hold on! That's not fair! Sheepy: Grif: You always have before! Sheepy: Grif: So you will this time... I shouldn't have said anything... Arsé-kun: Kay: I didn't know that's what that was... Sheepy: Grif:...Uh, but it was really clear. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... I'm good at math, not this stuff..! Sheepy: Grif: 'm no better... Sheepy: Grif: Just forget I said anything. Arsé-kun: Kay: Can I puh-leaze say what I wanted to before I lose it? Sheepy: Grif: What? Arsé-kun: Kay: I, um, *it's his turn to be uncomfortable, but for a different reason* Ya, uh, How'd it go.. *the reason of "speaking a language you usually don't"* Arsé-kun: *Kay proceeds to struggle over the next word, "lw’nafh", for a bit. That's a hell of a word to pronounce* Sheepy: Grif:...? Arsé-kun: Kay: .... ot ult... *visible struggling* .... Shit, I should have written down what Elyan said, dammit. Sheepy: Grif:....? Sheepy: Grif: Uh, so do I. But that's because I'm myself in my dreams, so of course I would. Sheepy: Grif:...... Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Ha. Sheepy: Grif:.............! Sheepy: Grif: Gh...! No!!! No!!!!! Sheepy: Grif: I messed up... I didn't mean that...! Arsé-kun: Kay: Give it another shot. Sheepy: Grif: GOOD! You better! Sheepy: Grif: No!!! Arsé-kun: Kay: ..... Okay, one more try before I go brain myself with that bottle. Sheepy: Grif: How do I... Arsé-kun: Kay: Griiiif! Sheepy: Grif: Kay?! Arsé-kun: Kay: I got you this! *he hands Griflet a rock. it's shiny.* Take care of it! Sheepy: Grif: E-eh?! For me?! Sheepy: Grif: I can have this? Arsé-kun: Kay: Just for you. You can hold this, too. *he takes his eyepatch off and gives it over as well* Sheepy: Grif:...! Sheepy: Grif: But, but...you need this...right? Arsé-kun: Kay: Not at all. Arsé-kun rolled a die with 20 sides. The die showed: 20 Sheepy: Grif:...? Arsé-kun: *and finally, someone in this goddamn hell of a mess manages to smile genuinely. it's Kay! :)!* Sheepy: Grif: !!! Arsé-kun: Kay: :D ? Sheepy: *Grif tries to smile back, but nerves finally get the better of him and he... breaks down crying. That helps* Arsé-kun: Kay: No, no, don't do that!! C'mon, Grif! Sheepy: Grif: I- I- Uh...! *sob* I messed it up! Arsé-kun: Kay: Like I didn't? Come on, threaten me for screwing up or something..! Sheepy: Grif: But it's all you're going to th-think of when you see me now...! *sob* Sheepy: Grif: I just messed up every step of the way.... *he continues crying... help him* Arsé-kun: Kay: ... ... ....... ....... Arsé-kun: Kay: ... I'm sorry. Sheepy: Grif:....? Wh-what? Arsé-kun: Kay: You did fine. I just never understood... It's my fault. Sheepy: Grif: No! Sheepy: Grif: I'm just bad at this...! Arsé-kun: Kay: We're bad at this! We're a disaster! Sheepy: Grif: Uh...? Arsé-kun: Kay: Together, we make one hell of a mess! Ain't that somethin'! *he bitterly laughs, but it's not funny* Sheepy: Grif: Uh...But... Sheepy: Grif: I asked Merlin for help... Sheepy: Grif:...! I shouldn't've said that... Arsé-kun: Kay: I asked the goose. Shit happens. Sheepy: Grif: Really...? Sheepy: Grif:......... Sheepy: Grif:.....Ahaha....Ahahahahaha! *he... looks surprisingly cheerful! Grif, actually laughing? It's more likely than you'd think.* I guess we both needed help with things like this, huh...! I thought it was just me... Arsé-kun: Kay: I thought it was just me... *he's staring at Grif in awe. Who knew this disaster knight could be so... so... cute???* Sheepy: Grif:...Uh, you've said things to me, too? Sheepy: Grif: Did I not notice...? Arsé-kun: Kay: I tried to! But I guess I wasn't clear enough... Or it got buried under me being an asshole. Sheepy: Grif: Uh...I don't understand humans very well... So I probably just assumed the latter... Arsé-kun: Kay: ... We're a mess. Sheepy: Grif: Yes... Arsé-kun: *distant wizards, one knight and a fou popping bottles in celebration* Sheepy: Grif: I didn't even plan what I'd do if you reciprocated the feelings... Sheepy: Grif:.No, I just didn't plan ahead at all. Arsé-kun: Kay: I never planned on saying it outright at all... I'm with you on this one. Sheepy: Grif: ....Uh, uh. I don't really know what happens from here. Arsé-kun: Kay: Me neither! What's your... ... ... Hey, your dad's okay with this, right? Sheepy: Grif: Uh, I haven't asked. Sheepy: Grif: Was I supposed to? Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Ummmm. Sheepy: Grif: And my other dad is hibernating right now. Sheepy: Grif: I'll ask him. Sheepy: *Grif opens the menu* Arsé-kun: *The menu immediately freezes upon opening and stops working. Menu Unresponsive. Menu has crashed* Sheepy: Grif:.....! No, no, no! H-he- did he ditch me?! *sob* I don't get it...! Arsé-kun: *Kay glares at the menu like it caused this, and slams a fist down on it. To his surprise, this works and several new dialogue boxes pop up!* Sheepy: Grif:...? Arsé-kun: Kay: I didn't know I could hit it... Sheepy: Grif: You can...hit it? Arsé-kun: Kay: I guess??? Sheepy: Grif: So many dialogue boxes... Arsé-kun: *The first box has confetti in it! It says "This scenario has been reviewed and approved by the board of Dad!" in two languages. English, and R'lyehian* Sheepy: Grif:?! Arsé-kun: Kay: Oh, he did allow it! Grif, we're okay!! Sheepy: Grif:!!! Arsé-kun: *Kay tentatively presses the "Okay" button. It works!!!* Arsé-kun: *The next box becomes the active dialog. This one says " Okay, you're being slow on purpose, aren't you? :P". It closes on it's own. The next one is just "????"* Arsé-kun: Yog: *previous message #4* These are going through, yes? I'm not merely speaking into a void? Arsé-kun: Yog: *previous #5* Helloooooo? Hewwo? Is Purson working? Arsé-kun: Yog: *#6* aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa? Arsé-kun: Yog: *7* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA?? Arsé-kun: Yog: *8* UHTW9028QHI3U8H2UOWQ.. *it's just button mash for several lines* Arsé-kun: Yog: *9, the last and biggest dialogue box* OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO NO NO NO, NONONONONONONONONONONO, NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO, NONO, OH NO, WHAT'S BROKEN?!? WHY IS PURSON NOT WORKING?!? NOW ISN'T THE PLACE FOR THAT, I CAN'T LET MY KIDS THINK I'M AGAINST THIS! I KNEW THIS WAS COMING, DAMMIT, DAMMIT, DAMMIT ALL TO GRANDFATHER'S DARKEST CORNERS! F U C K Arsé-kun: Kay: ... I see the resemblance. Sheepy: Grif:...? Sheepy: Grif: It broke...? How? It can break...? Sheepy: Grif: It’s never broken before. ... Is it a quest? Hmm...hmm.. I have to fix it... Sheepy: Grif: Let’s work hard to fix it. *he’s recovered his composure...* Sheepy: Grif: And then we punch my uncle until it works. Arsé-kun: Kay: We can't just punch it until it works? Why not? *he might be joking. might* Arsé-kun: *The Panic Dialogue box closes on it's own, and up comes a new one* Sheepy: Grif: Hm? Arsé-kun: Yog: Oops, the menu server malfunctioned! Only that first message was intended to be read, but the confetti crashed everything! Oopsie whoopsie! uwu Sheepy: Grif: Hmm..So no punching anyone after all...Unfortunate. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... I don't understand this last part. Sheepy: Grif: I see. It is unnecessary. Sheepy: Grif: Simply, the server broke due to the confetti. Arsé-kun: Kay: Incredible. Sheepy: Grif: It's fine now. Sheepy: Grif: Howver... I did not plan this far, so I do not know what to do from here... Arsé-kun: Kay: Do we go back...? Or do we brag that we did this better than most of the wizards? Sheepy: Grif: I don't know. Sheepy: Grif: I'll follow your lead. Arsé-kun: Kay: Eh... Fuck those wizards. They can eat shit and choke on it. Deal with it when it's not night. Sheepy: Grif: Right. Sheepy: Grif: Makes sense. Sheepy: Grif: We can tell Elyan the news. Arsé-kun: Kay: And then rest up for another day of dealing with things I don't understand. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Kay: Exciting. I can't wait to get another headache. Sheepy: Grif: Let's work hard. Arsé-kun: *and so, they turn around and go back to home base.* Sheepy: Grif: We’re back. Sheepy: *Elyan turns his head much further back than a cat should and slowly slides down the wall.* Arsé-kun: *Sith throws a jingly ball at him for his anatomy breaking crimes* Sheepy: *Elyan chases after it... clumsily. He's still not used to this form.* Arsé-kun: *The door closes behind them, nearly hitting their backsides. Spooky!* Sheepy: Grif:! Sheepy: *Grif draws his sword!* Arsé-kun: Arthur: Lower your weapon, Sir Griflet. It was only me. Sheepy: Grif: ....? Sheepy: Grif: You're a door? Arsé-kun: Arthur: I closed it for you. Lucan informed me it is still polite to do so. Sheepy: Grif: I see. Sheepy: Grif: I will keep it open so you can close it from now on. Arsé-kun: Kay: Or maybe don't do that? He won't need to if you do it yourself. Sheepy: Grif: But it's polite for him to close it and I shouldn't take that from him. Arsé-kun: Kay: It's polite to close a door after you use it in GENERAL! Unless someone is going in with you! Were you raised in a barnhouse?? Sheepy: Grif: No. In a cave. Sheepy: Grif: There are no doors in caves. Arsé-kun: Arthur: That makes more sense. Did your outing go well? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Good, good! That's wonderful to hear. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: The quest has been completed. Arsé-kun: Kay: Big alien gods are capable of panicking like people. We learned that today! Sheepy: *in the bg, Elyan is trying to play with the ball. he isn't quite getting it* Arsé-kun: *frustrated sith.jpeg* Sheepy: Grif: Yes. It is very concerning... I need to check on Dad later... Sheepy: Grif: I suppose other Dad too...but he's hibernating...He's supposed to wake soon... Arsé-kun: Arthur: Would I be able to meet him this time? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: He stayed away from you due to the sheer amout of knights around you. Sheepy: Grif: You should be safer now. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Wonderful! I've wanted to meet him for a while now! Sheepy: Grif: Knights are dangerous because they fight dragons for sport. Dad has been around for a very long time and probably would be unharmed by almost any weapon a knight could have, but... still he worried, just slightly. Sheepy: Grif: I'll introduce him to you when he wakes up. Arsé-kun: *Arthur is Pleased!* Sheepy: Grif: He lives in a cave. It's cozy. It's my childhood home. Sometimes I go back there. Arsé-kun: Kay: Who hasn't been in a cave before? Sheepy: Grif: People who haven't been in a cave before. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... I can't argue against that. Sheepy: Grif: It's where dragons store their hoards. Sheepy: I was going to design a ferret version of elyan because I thought it'd be fitting but thn I forgot Sheepy: *Elyan is blankly watching them in the background* Arsé-kun: *Elyan continues to be a mood* Sheepy: Grif: But for now, you can meet my other dad occasionally. Sheepy: Grif: He's Santa Claus. Sheepy: Lucan: Every Santa is someone's parent. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Mine. Arsé-kun: Yog: You called? Sheepy: Grif: Dad, this is my King. He's a ghost now. Sheepy: *Elyan approaches Yog* Arsé-kun: *Elyan is pat by an orb. Do not ask how this works.* Sheepy: Grif: The other cute cat is Cait Sith. Sheepy: Grif: He likes steak. Arsé-kun: Yog: Two kings. Interesting. I would curtsy, but I believe the problem with that is easy to see. Sheepy: Elyan: *honk* Sheepy: Grif: No pants. Arsé-kun: Yog: ..... There are several issues with this suggestion. Sheepy: Grif: For one, you'll be thrown in a dungeon for not wearing pants. Arsé-kun: Yog: ... Several knights have raided enemy camps alone and completely nude without ever seeing a dungeon for it. Sheepy: Grif: Unfortunately, you can't escape to put pants on and people are not thrilled to help you escape. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... Griflet, how many times have you done this? Sheepy: Grif: Armor wears down and generally I don't bother wearing it. Sheepy: Grif: I have a whole list on ratings of enemy dungeons on a scale of 10 stars based on areas such as food, atmosphere, sights, and general treatment. Arsé-kun: Arthur: How many times for not wearing pants, Griflet? Sheepy: Grif... Sheepy: Grif: 22. So, of course, I have top twenty best and worst dungeons to be stuck pantsless in. Sheepy: Grif: That is because two of those were in dungeons I'd already been caught in before without pants. Arsé-kun: Yog: Please wear pants to not be thrown into jail. It is not a dungeon. It is not fun. Sheepy: Grif: Clothes...clothes are not comfortable... Unfortunately, they're required. Sheepy: Grif: However, I sleep with full armor on. Arsé-kun: Arthur: It's very uncomfortable. Sheepy: Grif: You do it as well? Arsé-kun: Arthur: I've had to a few times. I did not enjoy the experience. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: However, I've slept through multiple people at once trying to beat me to death thanks to it. Sheepy: Grif: Sleep is important. It's very rude to interrupt it. Sheepy: Grif: Therefore, it's worth it. Sheepy: Elyan: *honk* Sheepy: Grif: No, don't wake Kay either. Arsé-kun: Kay: I'd like to, but I'm waiting for you to move your ass. Sheepy: Grif: Let's go, then. Sheepy: *Grif heads to bed* Arsé-kun: *Kay goes with, for the same purpose. finally, hell day can end* Sheepy: *Elyan sticks with Sith. He's just very excited to have a new friend!* Sheepy: *the next morning!* Sheepy: Grif: Rise and shine, Kay. We're going grave robbing. Arsé-kun: *Kay adamantly refuses to rise or shine.* Sheepy: Grif: *he throws Kay over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes* I appreciate your enthusiasm. Sheepy: Grif: Let's work hard as usual. Sheepy: Grif: But should I bring someone else with me.. Sheepy: Grif: *he goes looking for Arthur* Arsé-kun: *Arthur is in the hallway, inspecting a message board. What are these mysterious scrolls, so thin and straight but so clean? .. It's just old fliers for school events, but he's more interested in the paper itsellf* Sheepy: Grif: There you are. Sheepy: Grif: We're going grave robbing. Come with us. Sheepy: Grif:...Ah, that's paper. You can eat it. It's decent in flavor. Sheepy: Grif: However, it's warmer and tastier right out of the printer. Arsé-kun: Arthur: What is a printer, Sir Griflet? Arsé-kun: Arthur: But I see.. Paper is much different than it used to be. Sheepy: Grif: It takes the contents on a paper and duplicates them onto a new paper. Arsé-kun: *Featuring Kay just not bothering to argue because he isn't winning this. He's stuck on all fronts. Help him.* Arsé-kun: Arthur: Fascinating! And it doesn't require a human to manually do this? Sheepy: Grif: It can clone it infinitely so long it has its two most important supplies: Ink and paper. Sheepy: Grif: It just requires a human to put the page in. Arsé-kun: Arthur: :O Sheepy: Grif: Unlimited Page Works. Arsé-kun: Yog: *from Paimon* It also requires electricity, do not forget that crucial element! Sheepy: Grif: If you continue to punch it it will not require electricity. Arsé-kun: *Yog responds by bringing up an old tutorial on machine durability. aka "dont do that"* Sheepy: Grif: I see. Sheepy: Grif: Well, you have to come with us. Arsé-kun: Arthur: I would love to, except I am bound to the Excalibur. Where I am presently is the furthest I can go. Sheepy: Grif: Ah. I'll just carry its wielder with me too. Sheepy: Mordred: Man, sure is too bad for you that I don't want to help my stinky, garbage, good for nothing dad by carrying the shiny king sword, huh? You totally need mt help, don't you? (Griflet: No.) C'mon, c'mon, beg for my help! I know you want it! Don't be shy- (Griflet: You're useless to me.) -EH?! Sheepy: Mordred: How could I possibly be USELSSS to you?! Sheepy: Grif: I don't know you and you aren't a potential social link. Arsé-kun: Kay: Also, you're annoying and don't know how to shut up. Arsé-kun: *Arthur makes the squinting cat face* Sheepy: Mordred: How do you not know me? You SAT NEAR ME! AT THE TABLE! And made eye contact many times! -And maybe you're just not very tolerant! Sheepy: Grif: I have never seen you before. Arsé-kun: *Kay is laughing into Grif's shirt.* Sheepy: Mordred: You guys are JERKS! Sheepy: Grif: ? Arsé-kun: Arthur: Perhaps put your helmet on. Sheepy: Mordred: Ugh, fine! Sheepy: *Mordred does so* Sheepy: Grif: Ah. Bucket head. Sheepy: Mordred: Ugh, fine! Sheepy: *Mordred does so* Sheepy: Grif: Ah. Bucket head. Sheepy: Mordred: It's Mordred. Mordred! The King's son!! Sheepy: Grif: Ah. I've never heard of you. You aren't at all charming like the Queen... Sheepy: Mordred: *huff* You'll all see! One day I'll do something so great everyone will regret not paying attention to me sooner...! You won't even be able to claim we hung out together!! Sheepy: Mordred: "Man, I wish I could've been friends with him before he got popular! Now he doesn't have the time of day for people like me"... That's what you'll think, Dad! And then I'll hang out with you anyway! Not because I like you but to prove that I'm better than you and I'd actually give time to my family no matter how big I am. No, not because I ever want to spend time with you nor my uncle! Because I hate both of you but especially you! Sheepy: Aru: Mordred, you're being loud. Arsé-kun: Kay: Morning, Princess. Your service is required! Sheepy: Mordred: See, see! I spend way more time than my great, great, wonderfully great grandkids than you ever spent with me! And look at how much they love me! You can see where you went wrong, I bet! Sheepy: Aru: Really? Where are we going? Sheepy: Aru: How can I help? Sheepy: Mordred: I even kick Lucan around until he helps them figure out tough homework problems! Yup, I really am the best. Arsé-kun: Kay: Mode, nobody's even listening to you Arsé-kun: Arthur: I need to be mobilized, for one. Griflet referred to it as "Grave Robbing", but a more accurate term would be "Restoring me to being alive." Sheepy: Aru: Oh, I see. Sheepy: Aru: I'll get the sword then! One moment. *she leaves briefly before returning with the sword* Sheepy: Mordred: Why does nobody ever listen to me? Arsé-kun: Kay: Because you have no concept of timing or letting important things happen? You can bully your father better after we make him physical, okay? Can you wait that long? Sheepy: Mordred: Heh! I'm patient! I've waited so long for this... What's one more minute! Sheepy: Mordred: But you better not run away! Sheepy: Mordred: I'll track you down! Sheepy: Aru: You can't leave here. Sheepy: Mordred: Ghhh... Details... Sheepy: Aru: Are we ready to go? Arsé-kun: Kay: We're about 90 to 95 percent ready! Sheepy: Aru: What's missing? Arsé-kun: Kay: My feet being on the ground. Sheepy: *Grif puts Kay down* Arsé-kun: [Quest: Arthur’s Corpsereal Forme] Arsé-kun: Kay: ... Do I have to see these terrible puns every time we set out to do something? Sheepy: Grif: No, just wear an eyepatch over both eyes. Sheepy: Grif:............. Sheepy: Grif: Ha. Ha. Ha. Arsé-kun: Kay: .... *he just sighs* Sheepy: Grif:...Because you cannot see with both on. Sheepy: Aru: He'd smack into everything, though. Sheepy: Grif: Dad writes them. Sheepy: Grif: He’s so busy, and yet he does it anyway... Sheepy: *The group gets to the lake!* Sheepy: Grif: It’s in there. Sheepy: Grif: We just have to get it out. Simple, one step quest. Sheepy: Aru: How? Sheepy: Grif: By getting it out. Arsé-kun: Kay: We need to find it. I can stay down there long enough to do this, but I don't know where it is. Arsé-kun: Arthur: That would make the most sense, but... I wasn't buried with it. Sheepy: Grif: We could also have the King go through to see where it is. Use his ghost tricks to find its core... Eh, wait, wrong thing. Sheepy: Grif: You weren’t buried with it, hm. Sheepy: Grif: And Bedivere’s memory seems to be failing him generally... So would he remember where your body is exactly, I wonder... Sheepy: *Nearby, Bedi has arrived with flowers! He places them down by the lake. he doesn’t seem to notice the group and is more fixated with a certain spot in the lake. [Burial Spot has been marked on the minimap!]* Arsé-kun: Kay: *strolling over* Morning, Bedi. No wizards? Sheepy: Bedi: ...Oh, Kay! *he looks up, visibly surprised* I think it’s too early for them... Arsé-kun: Kay: What losers. Sheepy: Bedi: They usually do not come with me. Sheepy: Bedi: Coming here daily would probably be too tedious for them. Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose there is no point for me to come here anymore, but it always helps clear my head and keep me focused. Arsé-kun: Kay: Then what's gonna stop you? Sheepy: Bedi: Nothing. Sheepy: Bedi: Even if his soul is no longer here...I must visit every day to make sure his grave is not defiled. One of my final acts for my King was to prevent geave robbers from finding his body...so I must continue that service. Sheepy: Grif: We're going to rob his grave. Sheepy: Bedi: ! *he appears conflicted* ...I cannot let you do that. But if you know the location... I'm not stupid. I'd die trying to protect it from you. But I made a promise...so I can't die here. Sheepy: Grif: Ah. Well, you can go find another promise after I stomp on this one. I believe in you. Arsé-kun: Arthur: *unsure* .. Is it still defilement if there is a necessary reason to dig it up? Sheepy: Bedi: I don't understand why you would want to be dug up. This was Lucan's last action for you. ..Can I really just erase that? Arsé-kun: Arthur: Because according to most recordings of our stories, it suggests I would once again walk the Earth. This is difficult when I am not alive or have a physical forme. The act is not to destroy the site- It's only an extraction process. And if I die again, this will be where I am returned to. It will only be a temporary situation. Sheepy: Bedi:....*he's mulling this over* ....Right, that makes sense. Sheepy: *Bedi hesitantly lifts his hand and points to a spot in the lake* Arsé-kun: Arthur: Thank you. Arsé-kun: *Unfortunately, Arthur does not have the range for this and can't actually reach it* Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize for its quality... it's the best I could do. If I were Sir Lancelot or Sir Gawain, I am sure I could have given you the grand burial you deserved. Arsé-kun: Arthur: I appreciate it all the same. Sheepy: Bedi:...! *his eyes widen in surprise* Really...? Arsé-kun: Arthur: Why would I not? Sheepy: Bedi: Because Sir Lancelot and Sir Gawain could have done better had they been there. Arsé-kun: Kay: I got it, I got it! *no hesitation before throwing himself into the lake. he got it he got it* Sheepy: Bedi:?! Sheepy: Grif: He can swim. Arsé-kun: Arthur: I hope so. It would be awfully ironic to be unable to drown but also be unable to swim. Sheepy: Grif: I can swim. Arsé-kun: Arthur: We know, Griflet. Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Good. Arsé-kun: *Griflet is reminded by a menu pop up that if he wants to participate in things like this, he needs a Swim over 15.* Sheepy: Grif:! Sheepy: Grif:...But water's cold and wet... Sheepy: Grif: The only water I like is Elyan. Sheepy: Grif: I hate going in it. Arsé-kun: *Yog's only reply is "Lol git gud noob". classy* Sheepy: Grif: Guh...! Sheepy: Grif: F...fine! I'll...! Sheepy: Grif: I'll show you! I'll get good! Nobody can doubt my capabilities! Nobody!!! Arsé-kun: Yog: There is a time and place for everything. But not now. Sheepy: *Grif has gone into rage and reject input mode. He jumps in.* Arsé-kun: *Yog gives up and goes back to his other duties. Whatever.* Arsé-kun: *It is very wet. It is very cold. It is a body of water in the winter. How the lake is not frozen over is completely beyond me.* Sheepy: Bedi:...But his swimming skills are some of the worst among the knights. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... *he just kinda accepts that this is happening* Sheepy: Bedi: Should we do something...? Arsé-kun: Arthur: Probably...? Sheepy: Bedi: Um, ummm... Sheepy: Bedi: He's going to get sick... Arsé-kun: Arséne: Absolutely. Sheepy: Bedi:?! Sheepy: Bedi: Why are you here...? Arsé-kun: Arséne: I offered my assistance to Meril yesterday, so I am making good on it. Good morning and bonjour to you too. Sheepy: Bedi:.... Sheepy: Bedi: *he anxiously looks to Arthur* Arsé-kun: Arthur: If Meril permitted it, I do not see a problem with it. He's the most trustworthy in these sorts of situations. Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose so... Arsé-kun: Arséne: Fantastic. I was not sure how this was going to be done, so I brought some modern tools along. Sheepy: Bedi: Really? Arsé-kun: *Arséne responds by pulling his toolbag to the front. Yes, really* Sheepy: Bedi: Ah...Kay and Griflet are already in there. Kay is a very talented swimmer. Sheepy: Bedi: Griflet is one of the worst among the knights. Arsé-kun: Arséne: ... Well, that sounds like a personal problem. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes. Sheepy: Bedi: Perhaps Kay will need these tools. Arsé-kun: Kay: Kay would like these tools. Please take this Griflet. Sheepy: Grif: *he's clinging to Kay, shivering all over..* I-it's cold! Cold!! Sheepy: Bedi: *he takes his coat off and puts it on Grif* Arsé-kun: Arséne: If you need out of this weather, I drove here, so you can warm up in the car. Sheepy: Grif: Uh...Paimon, define car. Arsé-kun: Yog: Big metal machine with four wheels designed to carry two or more occupants. Used for travelling, and for far more distance than any normal mount. They have heating and air conditoning. Sheepy: Grif: ! Sheepy: Grif: Yes. I want warmth. Arsé-kun: *Arséne puts the toolbag down and guides Grif to Warmth* Sheepy: *Grif is very happy to have warmth!* Arsé-kun: *Kay checks the bag. What is this strangely shaped sickle? Is this a weapon? Is this a mattock? It's sure about to be!* Sheepy: Bedi: It's a pickaxe. Arsé-kun: Kay: Real clever name. Sheepy: Bedi: It's like an axe but it's used to pick at hard objects. Arsé-kun: Kay: Like rocks? Sheepy: Bedi: That's its main use. Sheepy: Bedi: It's a dangerous tool for archaeology because it can destroy bones with ease. Sheepy: Bedi:...Oh, would you know what archaeology is, even... Arsé-kun: Kay: Nope. Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose eventually I should brief you on modern subjects. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yes, please, break me in half with your modern knowledge. Sheepy: Bedi: Um...This may be difficult to do. Sheepy: Bedi: But I can do it after you've finished. Arsé-kun: Kay: Well, okay. I will go back into the depths of cold. Arsé-kun: *Kay walks into the lake a second time. Just right on in. just* Sheepy: Bedi: Good luck! Arsé-kun: *bubble sound. kay says thanks* Sheepy: *Bedi awaits Kay's return.* Arsé-kun: *LATER* Sheepy: Bedi: Hmm... I wonder when he'll return... Arsé-kun: Arthur: It certainly is taking him a while. Sheepy: Bedi: *he's activated Airgetlam to keep everyone warm. it's a much more welcoming light than how it is in combat.* ...I think he's coming back! Sheepy: Bedi: Kay, did you find it?! Arsé-kun: Kay: *resurfaces, finally* What?? Sheepy: Bedi: The body? Arsé-kun: Kay: I think so??? I got a huge chunk of rock?? Nothing else down there! ... Also, I found another sword so that was cool. Sheepy: Bedi: Ah....Um, we need to open the chunk of rock. Arsé-kun: Kay: I did all this myself, you come get it! It's heavy! Sheepy: Bedi: You brought it up? Arsé-kun: Kay: Yes! I considered bringing it up all the way, but nobody wants to see me that big I bet. Sheepy: Bedi: I can do the rest. Sheepy: *Bedi goes to the rock and lifts it using airgetlam* Arsé-kun: *it very big. very rectangl. much purble. wow* Sheepy: Bedi: How do we open it...? Arsé-kun: Kay: Hit it? It looks like a gem, but there's somethin' in there. No doubt about it. Sheepy: Bedi:....Yes, I can do that. Sheepy rolled a die with 20 sides. The die showed: 3 Sheepy: Bedi: *he puts it down on the ground and inhales sharply, positioning himself to break the crystal. ...He begins trembling all over. What if he damages the King? Oh no. Oh no. Oh no- Ah, he only hit the edge...* Arsé-kun: Kay: That proves we can break it. Good work, Sir. Sheepy: Bedi: ...? Sheepy: Bedi: I just cannot stomach the thought of potentially hurting the King... Arsé-kun: Arthur: I'm dead. You have permission to injure me slightly. Sheepy: Bedi:..... Arsé-kun: Arséne: *He is disregarding this for the chunk of gem on the ground. He wants the Shiny. He has the shiny. And he didn't steal it! Technically!* Sheepy rolled a die with 20 sides. The die showed: 7 Sheepy: get ready for nat 1 Sheepy rolled a die with 20 sides. The die showed: 1 Sheepy: *Bedi tries calming his nerves. He finally manages to... But just as he's about to make contact, Airgetlam deactivates and Bedi instead pulls a muscle. The area remains undented...* Arsé-kun: Kay: .... Okay, move it, lemme have a go. Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize...I just can't...*he shifts so Kay can get to it* ...I have to, and yet, I... Arsé-kun: *Kay smacks it with the pickaxe. It bounces right off and he smacks himself in the face* Sheepy: Bedi:! Kay, are you alright?! Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah... That hurt, but worth a shot. Sheepy: Bedi: Switch on, Airgetlam! *His right arm lights up brightly! He brings it down upon the rock!* Arsé-kun: *Finally, some meaningful damage! He gives it a big ol' crack right in the middle!* Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, it's a start...! Sheepy: Bedi: *he brings Airgetlam down on the rock once more, fired up!* Arsé-kun: *He breaks it!!!* Sheepy: Bedi: *huff...huff...huff...* ...It's done.... Sheepy: Bedi: *he clutches the ribs on his right side* Sheepy: Bedi: Guh...! I'm sorry... *huff, huff* ...I suppose I've gotten rusty. Sheepy: Grif:...? *he approaches* ...It's rocks. ...Tasty... Arsé-kun: Kay: Grif, can you at least wait until we get Wart OUT of the rocks to eat all of them?? Sheepy: Grif: Yes. Sheepy: Grif: We can share them afterwards. Sheepy: Grif: They contain many vitamins. Sheepy: Grif: Like... Arsé-kun: Kay: They also contain break-your-mouth. Sheepy: Grif:.....Eh, what's a vitamin? Sheepy: Grif: It just sounds like a fun word...Probably good for you. Sheepy: Grif: Maybe you're just eating rocks wrong. Sheepy: Bedi: It's open...Now what do we do...? Arsé-kun: Kay: Hell if I know. Sheepy: Bedi: Uncover his body, I suppose... ... Ah, but I haven't seen it since I buried it. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Me neither! *trying to be funny to lighten the mood just a Little Bit* Sheepy: Bedi: So its status...I hope it has been perserved properly. Excalibur can help prevent aging, but... Sheepy: Bedi:...Decaying, I wouldn't know. Sheepy: Grif: Well, one way to find out. Sheepy: Grif: *He throws off the layer on top of Arthur's body* Arsé-kun: *If not for the fact that everyone present knows Arthur is dead, it would be surprisingly easy to mistake him for just napping in some rocks. Except the paleness and not breathing, but you get it. Shut.* Sheepy: Bedi:?! Arsé-kun: *Slight disappointment from Arséne, who was expecting a genuine corpse and not this preserved nonsense* Sheepy: Grif: Huh. Arsé-kun: Kay: Geez, what a loser. It can't be him, he's gotta be under. *he jokingly starts to lean down to fucking toss Arthur's body, but stops because he isn't actually going to* Arsé-kun: Arthur: :I Sheepy: Grif: He's surprisingly less dead than I remember him being. Arsé-kun: Arséne: He looks like he was only dead for about five minutes. Decay hasn't even set in yet. Sheepy: Grif: Well, decay's really lazing on the job. Sheepy: Grif: Go on, wear your fleshsuit. Arsé-kun: Arthur: My... My what? Pardon? Sheepy: Grif: Fleshsuit. Arsé-kun: Arthur: I firmly dislike that. Sheepy: Grif: Well, you don't wear a body. Sheepy: Grif: You are a body. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... Sir Griflet, you are henceforth banned from referring to my body as a "Fleshsuit". Sheepy: Grif: Go into your meat puppet and puppeteer it. Arsé-kun: Arthur: .... I take back my declaration in awe of how much worse you made it. Sheepy: *Bedi's broken down crying in the background from seeing his king again, but this isn't about him.* Sheepy: Grif: Good. Arsé-kun: *Bedi needs time to himself to process it all. Let him be* Sheepy: Grif: When you go into your body everything may feel off at first. Sheepy: Grif: You may feel like stiff. Because you're in one. Sheepy: Grif: .......Ha. Ha. Ha. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Can't this wait until after I have the ability to function? Sheepy: Grif: I will prepare my greatest joke for you for when you are able to function. Arsé-kun: Kay: That sounds horrific. Quick, take far longer than necessary. Sheepy: Grif: More time to think of one. Arsé-kun: *After a lot of deliberation and cautious lowering of one's self, Arthur does re-enter his body!* Sheepy: Grif: How are you feeling? Sheepy: Grif: Dead bodies are so slow to talk back. Arsé-kun: Arséne: It's not going to be that quick..! Sheepy: Grif: Oh. Sheepy: Grif: Why? Does he need to reboot his operating system? Arsé-kun: Arséne: That is... A surprisingly apt way of putting it, but yes. Sheepy: Grif: Paimon has many apts. Arsé-kun: Arséne: That's an App. Sheepy: Grif: Ah... Sheepy: Grif: So we just wait Sheepy: Grif: Bedivere, please cry quieter. Arsé-kun: Kay: Oi, eat sod, let him have it. Sheepy: Grif: Eat? ..... Rocks, tasty... Sheepy: Grif:......*He turns around towards the lake and starts digging for a rock* Arsé-kun: *he finds a rock immediately* Sheepy: Grif: *he starts eating the rock. cronch* Arsé-kun: Kay: .... So, Aru, this is a whole mess you've landed yourself into. You feel good about it? Sheepy: Aru: It's not the weirdest situation I've ended up in. I know my contribution has been minimal, but I'm happy that I helped someone. Arsé-kun: Kay: ....? How have you gotten into stranger than watching a ghost retake his centuries? Old? Corpse?? Sheepy: Aru: Our uncle travels often for business but occasionally he visits us. Arsé-kun: Kay: Yeah? Is he dead too? Sheepy: Aru: No, but he's supposed to be. Sir Lancelot nearly killed him for revealing the affair between the Queen and Sir Lancelot... Sheepy: Aru: He doesn't hold any grudges about it. Arsé-kun: Kay: ... .... How the hell is HE alive??? Sheepy: Aru: He's a vampire. Sheepy: Aru: He likes baking sweets so he usually brings them when he comes to visit. His lion-shaped cookies are cute... Sheepy: Aru: He's extremely prickly on the outside but he's sweet on the inside. Arsé-kun: Kay: Oh, he does that openly now?? Good for him. It's about damn time. Sheepy: Aru: Yes, he does. Apparently his boss does too. Arsé-kun: Kay: Is it just more acceptable now? Is that a thing men are permitted to do publically? Sheepy: Aru: Yup! Arsé-kun: Kay: We get back *he looks a bit excited* And you're showing me how to operate that so called "oven stove". Sheepy: Aru: Yeah, I can do that! I'm good at using it. Sheepy: Grif: You can cook, Kay? Arsé-kun: Kay: Used to. Not sure how it'll work out now. If I gotta make a fire and do it my way, so be it. Sheepy: Grif: I believe in you. Arsé-kun: Kay: Well now I have to! Sheepy: Grif: I'm sure you'll bake something great, dough you may mess up a few times. Sheepy: Grif:....Ha. Ha. Ha. Arsé-kun: Yog: [Quest: Arthur’s Corpsereal Forme: Completed!] *confetti, confetti, small trumpet fanfare* Sheepy: Grif: Guh! Sheepy: Grif: ...*he appears embarrassed*... It startled me. Sheepy: Grif: So with the quest completed...He's awake? Arsé-kun: Yog: [New Extra Quest: Life's Batter with Cakes!] Sheepy: Grif:....Cake... Sheepy: Grif: *His eyes have lit up...He's excited!* Arsé-kun: Arthur: ..... Cake sounds... *he sounds a bit hoarse* .... Really nice right now... Sheepy: Grif: I don't have any. Sheepy: Bedi: ...! Sheepy: Grif: You can have some later. Sheepy: Grif: For now, you need to get up. I won't carry you unless I have to. Arsé-kun: Arthur: .... ..... *he coughs* Sir Bedivere, please assist. Sheepy: Bedi: ...! Yes, of course! *He rushes over to Arthur's side and lifts him up* Arsé-kun: Kay: Great, cool, can we go now? It's goddamn colder than the inside of a winter fae's dead heart and tit. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes. Please lead the way. Arsé-kun: Kay: I gotta do everything in this shit century?? *but, he eventually does. he isnt happy about it.* Sheepy: *Bedi follows Kay to their destination. Grif and Aru follow as well.* Sheepy: Grif: *he takes off the coat Bedi gave him and shoves it at Kay* Arsé-kun: *Kay takes it without complaint. For once* Sheepy: Bedi: How do you feel, my King? Sheepy: Grif: With his hands. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Like I got hit by a bear. Sheepy: Bedi: Maybe you should take advil...Oh, you wouldn't know what that is. Sheepy: Grif: It's what you forge weapons upon. Arsé-kun: Kay: That's an anvil. Sheepy: Grif: Oh. Sheepy: Bedi: Advil is a pain medication. Sheepy: Bedi: It temporarily relieves pain. Sheepy: Bedi: Some types of pain medication reduce swelling as well and allow blood to flow easier, which is problematic if you're bleeding. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Ah. I meant hit as in... Hm... Sheepy: Bedi: However, I cannot attest to its usefulness. I stopped feeling pain long ago. Arsé-kun: Arthur: That is extremely concerning. Sheepy: Bedi: I have very few sensations when it comes to touch, I'm afraid... Cold does not bother me because I cannot feel it. The same goes for heat. Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose that's why I am not bothered by Airgetlam being up against what was once a tender area. Sheepy: Bedi:...Heating up. Arsé-kun: Arthur: .... Extraordinarily concerning. Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose so. Sheepy: Bedi: But... if not feeling is the price I must pay to always be there for my King, it is a small price. Arsé-kun: Arthur: *mac loading cursor* Arsé-kun: Arthur: .. If everything being blurry is my price for being back, so be it. Sheepy: Bedi: We can get glasses for you. Arsé-kun: Arthur: What will glass do...? Sheepy: Bedi: It corrects vision. Sheepy: Bedi: You'll need to get a special prescription... But we can do that later. Sheepy: Bedi: It should fix everything. Sheepy: Bedi: You wear it over your eyes. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Interesting. Sheepy: Bedi: Just be careful not to break them. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... Because it's glass. Sheepy: Bedi: And they're somewhat expensive. Arsé-kun: Arthur: But isn't glass just hot sand..? Sheepy: Bedi: Well, the glass is special because it's custom made to fit your specific vision so you can see well. Arsé-kun: Arthur: That's amazing. Things have certainly advanced... Sheepy: Bedi: Yes! Science truly is amazing! Arsé-kun: Arthur: You'll have to inform me of more! It's very interesting! Sheepy: Bedi: Yes! Sheepy: Bedi: There's a lot to learn. For example...The Earth is round. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Oh, that was proven? Very nice. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes. Sheepy: Bedi: You can put your clothes in a box and they come out clean. Arsé-kun: Arthur: No hand washing by maids anymore.. Sheepy: Bedi: Some clothes need hand washing. Most don't. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Kay can still do the laundry. Sheepy: Bedi: Kay is very talented... Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... I fully expected a complaint of some kind. Sheepy: Bedi:...? Kay? Arsé-kun: *... Nothing* Sheepy: Bedi: Hm...he must have needed to do something... Sheepy: Bedi: Where do I carry you to...? Arsé-kun: Arthur: The sofa, I suppose. I would like to try that. It looks soft.. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, that works. *he carries Arthur to the sofa* Arsé-kun: *Well, they found Kay, hogging up all of the sofa space and leaving his wet clothes on the floor. How'd he change this fast? Probably learned that from Grif. I don't know either.* Sheepy: Bedi: Ah.... Arsé-kun: Arthur: Oh, that's a shame. Sheepy: Bedi: I should find a blanket for him afterwards... Arsé-kun: Arthur: It would be wise. Sheepy: Bedi: But finding a place for you to rest is my top priority. Sheepy: Bedi: After I find a place for you, I can figure out the difficult situation of how I can be here for you if you need me if I don't live here. No phone yet...Hmm. Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... You don't have to be. You have your own life, don't you? Sheepy: Bedi: My role is being your knight. Without that, I am nothing. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... ... *he opts to just quietly leave again. Nevvvvvermind.* Sheepy: Bedi: If you have no need for me, well... Hmm. The very thought of being useful to you in the future helps me cling to life. Arsé-kun: Arthur: I didn't say that, but I doubt I'd need you so often that you move. ... That is a poor way of saying it. Arsé-kun: Arthur: I'm trying to tell you that you don't need to orbit around me like Kay does alcohol. Sheepy: Bedi: I see. That makes sense. But you'll still need to communicate with me long distance. ...For now, I'll trade phone numbers with Aru if she allows it... Sheepy: Bedi: However... unfortunately, other than the Queen, Sir Lancelot, and the wizards... I am the only one who can relate to both being a part of the past while still having understanding of modern technology...Simply, among us, none would be better for making you accustomed to modern times. Arsé-kun: Arthur: And between all of you, I believe it will go well. You do not need to do it all yourself. Sheepy: Bedi: However, I should do all I can. Sheepy: Bedi: I cannot just sit around and do nothing. I have already done this for too long. Sheepy: Bedi: My embarrassment of my performance back at the lake is unfathomable. Sheepy: Bedi: No knight of yours can possibly be so weak. So, I must work harder. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Sir Bedivere? Sheepy: Bedi: Yes? Arsé-kun: Arthur: ...How did Kay say it? "Shut the hell your mouth"? Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize. You need not hear my thoughts on the matter. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Your thoughts are valuable input. You're valuable. Stop saying things like that and meaning them. Sheepy: Bedi: *he appears surprised... and incredibly happy very briefly!* Arsé-kun: Arthur: Instead, I'd rather you think about how well you did today. Sheepy: Bedi:...! Arsé-kun: Arthur: Can you do that for me? Sheepy: Bedi:...! Yes, of course! If that is your order, I will pride myself in today's achievements. Arsé-kun: Arthur: I shouldn't have to make that an order... Sheepy: Bedi: Unfortunately, compared to my fellow knights, my achievements are insignificant and overall unmemorable. It is difficult to feel pleased with them. But if you believe it them to be great, then they must be. Sheepy: Bedi:...Hmm, but...am I forgetting something? Sheepy: Bedi: Ah! Merlin never came to see you... Sheepy: Bedi: He did seem incredibly unhappy the other day. It worried me, but...I am sure he just felt overwhelmed. Arsé-kun: Arthur: Perhaps you should ask him. He seems to speak with you easily. Sheepy: Bedi: It would not be an ideal relationship if you could not speak easily to your husband... Arsé-kun: Arthur: Yes, yes, that makes s- --- Arsé-kun: Arthur: ... I'm sorry? Sheepy: Bedi:? Our relationship is wonderful... Were you worrying otherwise? Arsé-kun: Arthur: No, no. I wasn't aware that you two had gotten together. My apologies for my rudeness, and congrats to you both! Sheepy: Bedi: Thank you. Arsé-kun: Kay: *irritably* Can you two chatter somewhere else?? Sheepy: Bedi:...Ah, right! We still haven't found a place for you... I apologize, Kay. Sheepy: *Bedi brings Arthur to a place to lie down* Arsé-kun: *Arthur appreciates this. Kay also appreciates them leaving him alone* Sheepy: Bedi: I will go speak to Merlin about coming to visit you tomorrow. For now, please rest. You have had a long day. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Merlin certainly agrees on that plan, unless the day is taken up by something else! Even then, I'll call! Sheepy: Bedi: Ah! Merlin! You're here! *he gives Merlin a huge smile!* Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, and if you're not up early, I'll make sure to wake you if you'd like. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Same to you, hun. Except you won't get a choice. Sheepy: Bedi: For now, let's go home and get ready for tomorrow. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yeah, yeah, one thing first. *He leans down to give Arthur a biiig hug. It is Required* Sheepy: Bedi: Now, let's head home so our King can sleep. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yes, yes, of course. Sheepy: *Bedi gently takes Merlin's hand and heads out!* Arsé-kun: *Merlin's hopes go up. What a fool he is.* Sheepy: *Enjoy this while you can, Merlin!* Arsé-kun: *HE'S SURE GOING TO!* Sheepy: Bedi: After visiting the King tomorrow, we can stop by the sweets shop we always go to. The King might like it too, so we can invite him when he's recovered. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oh, he'd absolutely love it, no doubts! Sheepy: Bedi: Yes! I need to start training again as well... I've gotten rusty, it seems. Maybe sometime later this week you could train with me? Sheepy: Bedi: I believe training will help both of us. Sheepy: Bedi: And anyway...I embarrassed myself today from being rusty. I'd rather only mess up in front of you alone...I don't feel embarrassed when it's you. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Aw, I thought you did great. It was just some nervousness, nothing unusual. Sheepy: Bedi:...Nervousness isn't something I should let control me. Sheepy: Bedi: I make mistakes when it consumes me. Sheepy: Bedi: I pulled my rib on the right side thanks to this. But as a knight... I cannot let such things bother me. And yet, even with my senses dulled, breathing is uncomfortable. Sheepy: Bedi: However...around you, I do not mind letting that show. You wouldn't judge me over it. *he grins* Thank you. Let's train hard together, okay? Arsé-kun: Merlin: You hurt yourself?? I'll judge you on that and only that. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I'm healing that as soon as we get back! Arsé-kun: Merlin: After that, yes, absolutely! *he looks pumped* We're gonna kick so much ass! Sheepy: Bedi: Ah, you'll heal my ribs? Thank you. I appreciate it. Arsé-kun: Merlin: <3 You're always welcome Sheepy: Bedi: *He's very pleased!* Arsé-kun: *Because Bedi is pleased, Merlin is happy! All is Good* Arsé-kun: *and they go home. bedi is healed. a good time is had. merlin brags at 90 miles an hour at meril. fou ends his fucking miserable life* Sheepy: *Meril is happy just being included in conversation.* Sheepy: *The next morning... Thanks to the excitement of yesterday, Bedi slept surprisingly well!* Arsé-kun: Merlin: *Throwing the door open* Goooood morning!!~ Up and attem, sweetcheeks! :D :D :D Sheepy: *Bedi was confusedly glancing around the room before turning his attention towards Merlin* ...Sweetcheeks? Arsé-kun: Merlin: You not like that one? That's okay, but c'mon, you're runnin' late hun. Sheepy: Bedi:..... Arsé-kun: Merlin:..... Sheepy: Bedi: (...He could be useful for information...) Sheepy: Bedi: (...But he could also be why I can't seem to recall a thing.) Arsé-kun: Merlin: .... What's wrong? Sheepy: Bedi: Are you certain you have the right person, sir? My name isn't "hun"... It's... (...What is it?) Arsé-kun: *Merlin freezes, losing all the color in his face as he stares at Bedi.* Sheepy: Bedi: (There has to be something with my name on it... Does this ring have an inscription on it?) Sheepy: Bedi: *he looks his wedding band over closely.* Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... Oh, you're right! My bad, mistook you for your brother! Haha haha! Sorry for bothering you..! Sheepy: Bedi: Brother? Sheepy: Bedi: ...? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Haha, sorry, my bad!! I'll let you be! Sorry!!! *he excuses himself and promptly bolts* Sheepy: Bedi: Hey, wait...! (My source of information left...!) Arsé-kun: *Merlin does not wait. Merlin is already down the stairs and leaving.* Sheepy: Meril: Hey, Merlin, you forgot Bedivere... Sheepy: Myrrdin: Aren't you in a hurry! Arsé-kun: Fou: Fou fou! Sheepy: Meril: I'm sure it won't bug him too much though. He already forgets to bring you often enough. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I did my part here! *He gives them a big, empty smile. It is clearly fake. He did not even remotely try to hide how hurt he is, or how his heart is currently shattering into tiny pieces as they speak.* Arsé-kun: Merlin: Anyway, I'm dead inside, have a nice day!! :D :D :D *And he sure looks it. That is... Bad?* Sheepy: Myrrdin: What? Sheepy: Myrrdin: Did he kick you out? Arsé-kun: Merlin: What? I wish. Sheepy: Myrrdin: Eh? Sheepy: Myrrdin: Then what...? Sheepy: Meril: Maybe Bedivere broke up with him after deciding the King needed him more. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ...... I....... No, but... Sheepy: Myrrdin: Then what? Sheepy: Myrrdin: I've never seen you like this before. Arsé-kun: Merlin: .... ...... *He just sighs, dropping the obvious act for a moment. If he looked dead inside before, then now he matches the face of an actually dead person. Why have those lights and sparkles in your eyes when you can simply just not?* The inevitable finally happened. Sheepy: Myrrdin:......! Arsé-kun: *Merlin immediately puts the act back up, grins, and decides he's done with this discussion in favor of leaving.* Sheepy: Myrrdin:...I'm so sorry. Take the time you need. Arsé-kun: *Merlin exits the bar without a single line of sass. He's really hurting, and it shows* Sheepy: Myrrdin: Just...come back soon, okay? Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... Maybe. Arsé-kun: *Merlin leaves.* Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... (Why did I never prepare myself for this? I knew it was coming eventually. I knew, and it still doesn't help... There was nothing I could do, like usual.) Arsé-kun: Merlin: (Why am I so utterly useless? Meril hates his incubus half but manages to be the best at it, Myrrdin has a constant threat of dying and he still does his damnest.. But there was nothing I could do for him.) Arsé-kun: Merlin: *he shakes his head and then glances around* (Maybe I can stop off at our favorite.... Well, just mine now.) Arsé-kun: Merlin: (Wonder if Vivian's willing to put me down. Or would she just call me gross and throw me out? I'd deserve it either way..) Sheepy: Shuzo: Hey. You look down ⭐ Arsé-kun: Merlin: ...Oh. Morning, Shuu. You're out early. Sheepy: Shuu: I was bored⭐️ And I can’t let my sparkling dream tourists think I’ve disappeared⭐️ Hehe⭐️ But such a face doesn’t fit a cute idol like you⭐ Arsé-kun: Merlin: Like the viewers care. I'm pretty sure most of them are there because I give myself gigantic boobs and because I'm gross. Sheepy: Shuu: Hey, I’m there because you’re sparkling ⭐ Sheepy: Shuu: You don’t have to talk about what’s bugging you... just know that I’m here for you ⭐️ Just call my name and I’ll appear by your side... Hehe ⭐ Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... That helps a little. Sheepy: Shuu: Hearing that makes my heart sparkle ⭐️ In return... do one favor for me: give me a smile. Even an itty bitty one⭐️ Arsé-kun: *Merlin at least gives it a shot* Sheepy: Shuu: Hehe ⭐ Thank you ⭐ Sheepy: Shuu: When you feel down make sure to smile for me ⭐ My beloved friends being sad makes my heart crumble ⭐ Arsé-kun: Merlin: At least you have one ⭐ Mine took off for a week-long vacation in the Bahamas. Sheepy: Shuu: *his smile fades, leaving a concerned expression* ...Hey, c'mon, I'll treat you to something. I can't leave you like this. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I won't be in your way? I'm incredibly annoying. Sheepy: Shuu: You aren't annoying to me. You're my beloved friend. Arsé-kun: *Merlin perks up a bit!* Sheepy: Shuu: Where do you want to eat? Arsé-kun: Merlin: *he shrugs* Wherever the most people are, I guess. Sheepy: Shuu: Okay, let's go to Trip's. It's always crowded around now. Just make sure I don't eat too unhealthily... Nobody's there to make me eat veggies (star) Arsé-kun: Merlin: I'll do no such thing. Sheepy: Shuu: Hehehe. What a good friend you are. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Just don't let me order anything bad. Sheepy: Shuu: Will do ⭐ Arsé-kun: *it's time for a trashy breakfast place people only go to because it's open and has good grilled cheese!* Sheepy: Shuu: Great, we actually got a table ⭐ Is there enough people? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yes, I believe so. If everyone starts picking fights with each other, that's when we bail. Sheepy: Shuu:...Hmm? Okay. Sheepy: Shuu: If people start fighting, we can go somewhere else. Sheepy: Shuu: But for now, let's enjoy ourselves. Arsé-kun: *And they do! They get food, they eat, they chatter. ... Meanwhile, the Trip's is erupting into chaos around them. Just another normal morning at Trip's!* Sheepy: Shuu: Hehe. It's chaotic as usual. Arsé-kun: Merlin: We should probably get going soon... Don't need anyone realizing I'm the source of it. Sheepy: Shuu: Okay, then where do you want to go next? Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... That's a good question. Where could we go that won't start shit? Sheepy: Shuu: Denny's. Sheepy: Shuu:The head honcho was good about setting up a place that has that kind of effect ⭐ There's a bakery nearby too but I don't think you're in the mood to deal with the self-proclaimed waiter... He waited three seconds before telling me to leave the last time ⭐ Sheepy: Shuu: It's a new record. The food's too good to get mad at him though. Arsé-kun: Merlin: But it's more "You end up at Denny's" than "You intentionally go to Denny's", isn't it? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oh, well. If they have that cool animatronic again I'll shut up. Sheepy: Shuu: It looks so musical. I want it to sing to me. Sheepy: Shuu: Let's go, let's go ⭐ Sheepy: *Shuu drags Merlin to Denny's* Arsé-kun: *Merlin ends up at Denny's. His prophecy... Was true.* Sheepy: Shuu: Here we are. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Sheesh, this place always has such a weird vibe to it. Sheepy: Shuu: Yes ⭐ I rarely go here. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Same. After a while, the dulled emotions of drunks and stoners doesn't really do it. Sheepy: Shuu: Yes... And the fear of being interacted with. Sheepy: Shuu: It's okay, though. I could duet with the robot and nobody would ever recognize me ⭐ Sheepy: Shuu: My voice reaches the furthest borders space but not Denny's. Arsé-kun: Merlin: But is it here? Is the robot here? Sheepy: Shuu: Let's go look. Sheepy: *Shuu goes looking for the robot* Arsé-kun: *The robot is not on it's perch on stage. It must not be here today* Sheepy: Shuu: Nope. Too bad. Arsé-kun: Merlin: What a shame. Sheepy: Shuu: What do you want to do instead? Arsé-kun: Merlin: ♪ What do you do when you're stuck at Den-ny's? Sheepy: Shuu: Cry. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Okay, that's true but please don't. I already want to. Sheepy: Shuu: Did you want to talk about it? Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... Eh, at worst I'll sound like I'm on crack. Sure, I guess. Sheepy: Shuu: I'm a good listener. You can tell because I have four ears (star) Sheepy: Shuu:...Sorry. Go on. Arsé-kun: Merlin: *he slides into a booth* ... *sigh* You've seen how forgetful Bedivere is. Every time I think things are going well, Fate smacks me upside the head. I've been trying to help him for so long.. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... He woke up today not knowing who he was or who I was. Sheepy: Shuu:...! Arsé-kun: Merlin: It was inevitable. I knew it was coming. I knew..! Sheepy: Shuu: *his usual cheerful persona has faded* ...I'm so sorry. Sheepy: Shuu: Just because you knew doesn't mean you're to blame. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It feels bad. I've been trying so much to fix it or at least slow it. I've made no progress. Nothing works. *he looks down at the table* I can't call trying to help him a waste of time. heepy: Shuu: Have you brought him to any doctors? Sheepy: Shuu: Watson isn't a brain doctor but be might know a good one. Arsé-kun: Merlin: What kind of doctor would be willing to work on a patient well over five hundred years old? I can't just bust down a hospital door and ask them to take my boyfriend immediately. Sheepy: Shuu: You can if he can't remember anything. Sheepy: Shuu: That's an emergency. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I guess.. Sheepy: Shuu: You shouldn't carry this sort of burden alone. You might be some super powerful wizard but nobody is capable of everything. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Not yet. Sheepy: Shuu: You still intend to figure it out by yourself? You'd be better off bringing him to the hospital. Sheepy: Shuu: The body tends to collapse when it forgets its resolve to live. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... I never thought about it that way. If he even forgets that... Sheepy: Shuu: He might die without it, if I understand the situation properly. Sheepy: Shuu: Being his hero will feel satisfying if you succeed but relief when he gets help from many people is much better⭐ Arsé-kun: *Merlin is now visibly stressed. Good work, Shu⭐zo!* Arsé-kun: Merlin: We don't even know that many people anymore, though.. And it's not like we can go out much- if at all- with the curses stacked on us..! Sheepy: Shuu: Go to the Lupin guy who's been visiting you. Sheepy: Shuu: Detectives know everyone. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That's a detective... And I'm pretty sure he does muggle cases. Sheepy: Shuu: Nyarlathotep lives at his place rent free. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yes, let me literally ask the Crawling Chaos himself to help me with no demonic contracts. Sheepy: Shuu: My point is that he should know someone. Sheepy: Shuu: Maybe consider outsourcing help. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Let me just post a crowdsourcing post. Let me open a Patreon for my immortal husband. Better tell the big newspapers! Arsé-kun: Merlin: How am I gonna ask without sounding completely insane?? Sheepy: Shuu: He lives with Nyarlathotep. He also lives with my doctor. Someone there should know. Sheepy: Shuu: Don't throw away possibilities. It's better to seem crazy rather than actually become it from heartbreak. Arsé-kun: Merlin: You sound as if you've learned that lesson personally. Sheepy: Shuu: No, I'm just a movie buff... maybe ⭐ Hehe. Sheepy: Shuu: You can't just uncover all of my mysteries so quickly. Next you'll be asking my species. Company secret ⭐ Arsé-kun: Merlin: Hm, we'll see about that, you... *he looks Shuu over* Lets call you a fox for now. Sheepy: Shuu: Sounds fine to me. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Let me get this straightened out. You expect me to go to a place I have never been to, and to explain all of this like it's completely normal? Without accidentally draining the entire building? Sheepy: Shuu: I can go with you. Arsé-kun: Merlin: But would your man allow it? Sheepy: Shuu: Eh? Why would he care? Sheepy: Shuu: I could ask, but... Arsé-kun: Merlin: You know what? Good point. Sheepy: Shuu: Okay, when did you want to go? I guess you should bring Bedivere with you, too, in case it's a situation that can be fixed right then and there, right? Arsé-kun: Merlin: I should, but is it a good idea? Sheepy: Shuu: What's the potential harm? Sheepy: Shuu: He doesn't remember you and thinks you're abducting him? Sheepy: Shuu: It'd be best if you explained the situation. He seems gullib- I mean, trusting. Hehe ⭐ He won't doubt you. Sheepy: Shuu: Then, you bring him to the detectives and they can help you. Arsé-kun: Merlin: You really think it'll be that easy..? Sheepy: Shuu: Yeah. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... Hm. Maybe. Sheepy: Shuu: I believe in you ⭐ Sheepy: *Merlin gets a text. And another text. And another text. And five more texts. Short pause. Text. Text* Arsé-kun: Merlin: Sheesh, speak of the angel! *he goes to check, and it just keeps going off. bzz DING bzzz DING bbzzz DING bDING* Sheepy: *Most of the texts are incomprehensible combinations of letters, "ARE YOY OKAY???", "WHERE ARE YOU??", or "I'M SIRRY"* Sheepy: *Among the messages is a picture of Fou. It's from Bedi!* Arsé-kun: *Merlin looks relieved!* Sheepy: Shuu: Oh, it's him? Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's him. He's apologizing though it isn't his fault. Sheepy: Shuu: How kind of him (star) Arsé-kun: Merlin: [text: to Bedi] I'm okay, I'm at Denny's, don't be sorry, and don't go to Trip's- Last I saw it was a mess! Sheepy: *Merlin gets no response... It's just marked as Read...* Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... If he shows up in the next ten minutes, whatever we buy's entirely on my tab. Sheepy: Shuu: Eh? Why? Sheepy: Shuu: I offered to treat you... Arsé-kun: Merlin: You did, but I'm making a bet. Sheepy: Shuu: Oh, how exciting ⭐ Sheepy: *Bedi shows up a few minutes later, looking fearful!* Sheepy: *His eyes are red and puffy and his face is still damp from crying... You've looked better, Bedi!* Arsé-kun: *He's also looked much worse! Merlin isn't picky!* Arsé-kun: *Either way, Merlin waves him over* Sheepy: *Bedi rushes over to Merlin and embraces him. Thought you had personal space, Merlin? Not anymore!* Arsé-kun: *Merlin didn't want personal space to begin with. He had no need for that!* Sheepy: Bedi: Merlin...! I'm so sorry...! I... *sob* ... Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... I know, it's okay... It's fine, I understa-*hic* Sheepy: Bedi: No...! It's not fine! Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... *he takes a moment to swallow his own pride* ... Yeah, I know. You're right. Sheepy: Bedi: If only I could do something about it, but no matter how hard I try not to forget things, my effort is in vain. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It doesn't make any sense..! Nothing works, and it seems to happen whenever it wants..! Sheepy: Bedi: It doesn't appear to be connected to anything. I've always been on the forgetful side, but Sir Galahad suggested it was because I was an "airhead"... Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's not the same. Being a bit forgetful is one thing. This is... Completely different. Sheepy: Bedi:...Certainly, he did not mean it as an insult. so it must be that he meant I had too much air in my head for space for memories. Sheepy: Bedi:...But for now, we can't question why it has to happen. Just how to fix it. Sheepy: Bedi:...Until then... I just have to keep fighting not to forget my purpose. Without my purpose, I... Arsé-kun: Merlin: I've got nothing. At this point, I'm willing to get... Uh, what was it? Outside help? Sheepy: Shuu: Yup yup ⭐ Try talking to Mr. Detective. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Really don't think he's gonna have any good feelings towards us for it, but it'll be something. Sheepy: Shuu: Watson's a very good doctor so he might be able to help. Sheepy: Shuu: It's not like you have any other options anyway. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Even if I did, they're not exactly... Good. Sheepy: Bedi: Let's try our less risky options first. Arsé-kun: Merlin: So no bad decisions involving watery tarts? Good plan! Sheepy: Bedi: I'd rather we ask Sir Lancelot on matters concerning Vivian... Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? But we haven't asked him. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I'm gonna change that. *he promptly harasses sends a message to Lancelot* Arsé-kun: Merlin: And that's that. Not my problem anymore! Sheepy: Bedi: Eh!? Arsé-kun: Merlin: He can talk to her, I'm not chancing it! I like living! Arsé-kun: Merlin: After what she already did to us, no thanks! Sheepy: Bedi: Yes... I suppose so. Arsé-kun: *Rom impatiently staring at Shuu in the background.jpeg* Sheepy: Shuu: Oops⭐ There's my ride⭐ It's tough being so popular... Hehe⭐ Arsé-kun: Merlin: It really is 🌸 Don't distract your driver now! Sheepy: Shuu: Yes! Bye bye, good luck⭐ Sheepy: Bedi: What should we do...? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Well, let's see. Did you at least feed before you ran out here? Sheepy: Bedi: No. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Well, we're gonna solve that first. Sheepy: Bedi: Ah...good idea. Sheepy: Bedi: Hmm... What should I get... Sheepy: Bedi: What a lawless place...! Sheepy: Bedi: Certainly they must know...! Pork is eaten in the morning, chicken in the afternoon, and beef at night. Ah, but fish can be eaten at all times of the day depending on the type snd the meats can be swapped depending on availability and the way it's cooked...Hmm..hmm...maybe such rules are arbitrary... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Why would a place named after the deity of being rowdy and rambunctious care about this? Sheepy: Bedi: It is...? I have never met a deity named Denny before... Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's romanticized to modern english. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Oh, but if I translate, he might come out. We're not drinking this early. Sheepy: Bedi:? Sheepy: Bedi: Ah...so how Bedwyr became Bedivere... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yes, exactly like that! Sheepy: Bedi: And how Bedivere became Bedi...Yes, I suppose my name is too difficult to pronounce for most. Arsé-kun: Merlin: A nickname doesn't always mean your name is hard, Bedi. Sheepy: Bedi:...? Arsé-kun: Merlin: A shortening of someone's name is used for familiarity and friendliness. Or something. Sheepy: Bedi: I see... I could never comfortably use nicknames for others... However, having one does not bother me. Sheepy: Bedi: The risk of potentially seemingly overly casual is too great! Arsé-kun: Merlin: But you don't need to be so formal all the time either! Sheepy: Bedi: Hmm...I have to disagree. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Why? Embarrassed of being casual? Sheepy: Bedi: Yes. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Well, that's fine. Your formality is cute anyway~ Sheepy: Bedi: Yes. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Well, that's fine. Your formality is cute anyway~ Sheepy: Bedi: To be such a hopeless, sad man... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Ooooh, I'm Tristan and I'm sad, ooohhh, give me your paypal account Sheepy: Bedi: He never paid off his loans with me...! Sheepy: Bedi: ...Right, I know, I will get a hamburger. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Get two! All this made me hungry again! Sheepy: Bedi: Thinking of Tristan made me come to a decision... Sheepy: *a pink haired man rushes over, pursued by a blond. THE Denny* Arsé-kun: *One of them. One of them is The Denny. the other is an idiot* Sheepy: Pink: Hey hey! I'm your waiter! What do you want? Sheepy: Bedi: I want- Sheepy: Pink: Okay, okay! I believe in you! Go get the thing! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Wait a bit longer, you mongol! Sheepy: Pink: Eh? Arsé-kun: Merlin: At least let the man order first before Denny here gets your ass! Sheepy: Pink: Why? The kitchen is right there. If he goes in the kitchen, the food will be there. Sheepy: Dio: Y-you're a bodyguard! Why are you waiting on customers...? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Because he's an idiot. Sup, Denny? You low on drunkards today? Sheepy: Dio: Yeah, unfortunately... I want a drink... Arsé-kun: Merlin: Then go get one. Or is our songplayer not here because he's guarding the booze? Sheepy: Dio: Yeah...'cuz apparently I can't drink booze so early in the day. Sheepy: Dio: Thus guy is supposed to be Orpheus's bodyguard but he keeps trying to wait on people. Arsé-kun: Merlin: So no more drawing dicks on him when he isn't looking?? Sheepy: Dio: Yeah, he got fed up with it. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That's fair. A tad disappointing, but fair. Sheepy: Pink: I'm earning two wages by bodyguarding and waiting! Sheepy: Dio: You're not doing either... Arsé-kun: *every denny's regular's favorite robot finally takes his spot on the stage! Orpheus is here!! And boy does he looks weary despite being an animatronic. That's what he is. Clearly.* Sheepy: Bedi:...? Sheepy: Bedi: It's the fursona. Arsé-kun: Merlin: .... You know what? That's close enough.

#det. au #18

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