#I didn't care at all if this man punished me that way tbh...

[kyokutsu-sama]

Last night I had a great idea for a fic and I didn't hesitate to share it. He often invades my thoughts at night and as I know I'm not the only one who are obssessed with him here's something for all Kenpachi lovers🤭

You have no idea how much I read about him and that really motivates me to write something for him too.

I hope you like and please don't let it flop. I've been thinking about this all night❤

Kenpachi x reader

Tw: smut

You walked around the outside of the 11th division's quarter looking for Kenpachi and found it a little strange not to find him there training or something.

You kept looking for him and to your amazement you found him in the place where you least expected it, in his office.

"Well, I can't believe you're actually sitting there doing all these papers"You said as you entered and approaching the table

"Unfortunately that's the worst side of being a captain, I'd really rather be on a battlefield while cutting my enemies in two and feeling that thrill of fighting"He said without taking his eyes off the papers

"Yeah… that really matches your title"

"What about you? Don't you have anything to do?"

"I actually did but you haven't even looked at me yet"

"I'm busy"

You put yourself next to him while watching how focused and calm he was. You were glad you lived long enough to see the most sadistic man in soul society acting calmly. The only time he really looked like this was when he was sleeping.

You decided to tease him a bit by putting yourself between him and the table causing him to pull away from what he was doing and look at you.

"What are you doing?"

"You know, I came here because I wanted to show you something that you might like but since you seem busy, I'll just kiss you goodbye and go to the 6th division, maybe captain Kuchiki is free. What do you think?"

His blood boiled hearing your words. That damn idiot! Just hearing this man's name makes him feel angry. He gave you a death stare causing your lips to curl into a smirk after noticing his gaze and knowing that now you had his attention.

"What's wrong? You didn't like the idea?"You sitting on the table and sliding your foot between his thighs without taking your eyes off his

"Don't tease me like that Y/n, you know you're going to lose this fight"He said in a deep voice

"Really? Then why don't you start fighting seriously too. Let me see the true beast you are"You said bitting your lip and and putting your foot on his groin

He gave you a sadistic smile and grabbed your foot putting it aside.

"Don't forget that it was you who asked for it"

He got up from the chair attacking your lips voraciously as his hands tightened your waist and probably leaving bruises from his strong fingers on your skin. You wrapped your legs around him while holding the back of his neck with one hand to deepen the kiss. You needed him, that adrenaline rush that only he could give you.

"Show me what you got for me"He said biting your bottom lip

You smiled and started taking off your kimono revealing your completely naked body. He looked you up and down with a smile on his lips.

"You walked around completely naked like that? You really need me"He said, kissing you again

You took off the rest of the kimono and threw it on the floor as your hands rushed to remove his clothes. He moved his lips down to your neck leaving hickeys all over that area. He laid you down on the table and placed himself on top of you, his broad build covering your entire body. His mouth devoured your body fiercely, there wasn't even a bit of skin on your breasts that wasn't marked by the bites and hickeys he left. You moaned his name over and over, just his reiatsu was enough for your body to start releasing small drops of sweat. He pulled you to the edge of the table and spread your legs exposing your wet slit for him who licked his lips at the sight.

"I bet that the stupid Kuchiki doesn't make you that wet, does he?"

Without hesitation he placed his head between your thighs sucking all over your sensitive skin, making you arch off the table as you opened your mouth to moan his name loudly.

His hands came up to squeeze your breasts as his tongue licked up and down your folds. He dominated your body like no one else had ever done, you were sure that there was no other who could give you all that pleasure, only him. His hot mouth sucked on your little bud making you grip his black hair to ease that pleasure. You were so close and he could feel it in the way you were squeezing your thighs on either side of his head. He increased the intensity of the suctions making you come into his mouth, he rose while licking his lips and staring at your panting and sweaty body. You thought he was going to give you a little break after you came but he didn't. He turned you over on the table making you face away from him, his big hands spread your legs apart as he positioned himself in the middle of them. You could feel his cock against your wet folds making you moan a little.

"I'm pretty sure that Captain Kuchiki won't fuck you the way I'm about to do"He said next to your ear making you shiver

He put his hands on your hips pulling you against him without warning. You gripped the edge of the table, lifting your head and biting your lower lip to muffle the loud moan you were about to give. He wasn't kind to you but if we think about it, you weren't kind either when you mentioned the name of his rival. Your fingers gripped the edge of the table even tighter as he came and went hard and fast making his pelvis bump hard against you. His fingers dug into the skin of your hips guiding the thrusts. One of his hands went to your hair and gripped it as he fuck you from behind, you couldn't stop moaning his name and letting the entire division know what was going on. Your eyes rolled back as you got closer to coming again and having his cock inside you made you made you get closer of your peack.

"Keep moaning like that… and tell them who you belong to"He said without stopping the thrusts

"I-Im yours... ken-pachi…"You said between moans

"Again"He said as his hand marked the skin of your buttocks

"Im all yours... Fuck"

Your insides tighten around him more and more, he turned you so that you were facing him. He looked up into your face to find your eyes shining with lust and leaned down to kiss you even more needily as he wrapped your legs around his waist and his hands went to your neck holding it as he went back to fucking you even faster and harder.

"Ahh… I'm so close to c-come"You said while holding his forearms and rolling your eyes in pleasure

He smiled knowing he was pushing you to the limit and that spurred him on even more. You arched off the table as you tightened your legs around his waist and after a few more hard thrusts you came a second time as he poured his warm fluids inside of you. Your folds were dripping all over your skin. You were so exhausted, your legs were completely weak just like the rest of your body. Kenpachi withdrew from inside you while trying to catch his breath, you sat on the edge of the table looking at him with a satisfied smile on your face.

"What are you looking at? Want to go for a second round?"He said noticing that you were looking at him

"Just give me some time and then who knows if I don't line up in a second"You said winking at him

He went to you holding your chin and giving you a rough kiss, you held his shoulder moaning a little against his lips. You thought that would be the beginning of the second round, he was still hard but nothing else happened.

"I really hope you don't set foot in the 6th division because you can be sure that I will punish you"

"And what would that punishment be?"

"Do you really want to know?"

"It's better not, I don't want to spend the rest of my life in the 4th division"You said looking away a little

"Good"

You knew he wasn't joking and that's why you put aside the idea of going to pay a visit to Captain Kuchiki. For the sake of your legs.

[eldritch-nightmare]

slashers with hanahaki.

a/n: icb this took me like 2 months to finish omg anyways hanahaki is not a trope i personally enjoy but i like writing angst and i think it's an interesting concept and this is. honestly just an excuse to write amanda angst, actually. uhm. first post about slashers :thumbs up: might take time for me to get used to writing them tbh, so this might be short but!! i hope you enjoy it all nonetheless. ignore how long ethan's is. amanda comes with her own special bot so <3 enjoy tht if u use it.

includes: amanda young, quinn bailey, tiffany valentine, billy loomis, bo sinclair, and ethan landry.

warnings: gn!reader, angst, many mentions of vomit and coughing, blood, implied unrequited love (esp in bo's), randomly assigned flowers plucked out of my flower book.

AMANDA YOUNG

If there's one thing about Amanda that isn't hard to miss, it's the fact that she gets very jealous, very easily. It was obvious in the way she almost constantly glared at Lynn whenever the woman was in her line of sight, the way she held no kindness in her voice whenever the two were forced to speak to each other.

Well... it was obvious to John, at least. Even in the state that he was in, the man was nothing if not observant, and he certainly didn't miss the way Amanda's gaze would linger on you and Lynn. He didn't miss the way she would come up with random things for you to do, things that involved you keeping a distance from Lynn.

What John isn't aware of, however, is the fact that each time Amanda goes off alone, it's to cough and vomit up the flowers blooming inside of her. She loves you so much that she can't even be angry when she stares down at the bloodied petals of lavender in her hand as she gasps for breath.

This is her punishment, she thinks. It's her curse, one she'll keep to herself. She loves you, but she doesn't deserve you. If you get too close to her, if she shows that she cares for you, you'll die. They always do, and you're the one person she can't stand to lose.

So she'll keep this to herself. She'll diligently wash the blood off the petals in her hand and she'll put them with the rest, tucked away safely for no one but her to see. She'll let her love be a secret, even if her jealousy boils over.

QUINN BAILEY

Romance isn't something Quinn cares for. She's not interested in falling in love since it doesn't align with her goals of wanting to get revenge for her brother's murder. And you, the best friend of Samantha Carpenter, were meant to be another victim. The plan was to kill you in front of Sam, just to inflict a little extra trauma on her.

But that's not how things were turning out. The more time she spent with you, pretending to be friends with people she planned on killing, the more attached she was starting to become. It was small at first, something she could push aside at any given moment. But you just had to be nice to her.

With everything going on, everyone was always worrying over Sam or Tara, but during it all, you had pulled her to the side to ask how she was handling everything, asking if she was okay. And suddenly, it became harder to push those feelings aside, and camellia petals started forcing their way out of her throat whenever she coughed.

This didn't go unnoticed either, by her family or her 'friends', but she always brushed their concerns off. It's just a little cough, no big deal. But it wasn't. Your time to die was coming up, and Quinn was the one who was supposed to kill you. But now she's hesitating, her mind working a mile a minute to come up with a way for you to get out of this alive without risking everything else.

She loves you, as much as she loathes to admit it. She doesn't want to be in love, especially knowing you'll never love her back once you find out who she truly is.

TIFFANY VALENTINE

Pretty much everyone who knows Tiffany knows about her feelings for you. It's not something she bothers to hide, and even she's surprised that you aren't aware of the love that she has for you. Or maybe you're just pretending like you're oblivious? She certainly hopes not.

Either way, the first time she coughs a flower up, she feels... well... she wasn't upset. In her eyes, it was further proof of how much she truly adored you. The petals of pansies that she coughed up were always tucked away in a jar. She probably has like... 4-5 jars full of petals by this point.

She doesn't blame you for any of this either. It's not your fault that she fell in love with you! How could she not? You're you. Anyone could love you. She'd kill them if they did, of course, but her point still stands.

Of course, she's not an idiot. She knows what this means. The constant pain in her throat and the feeling of vomiting up blood and flowers is nothing compared to the pain of knowing you more than likely don't love her back. But it's a pain she's willing to bear if it means having you in her life.

And Tiffany is just... fairly confident that given enough time and patience, you'll love her back, one day. She could (and probably should) give up on you, she knows that, but she doesn't want to. Not yet.

BILLY LOOMIS

Love is not something that comes easily for Billy. He's damn good at faking it, but he tends to disappear the moment he starts feeling like he actually might be growing to love someone. But loving you? It was as easy as breathing, he didn't even notice he had fallen until the roses started falling from his lips. How cliché.

He's really... torn, to be honest, for many reasons. This little illness of flowers could potentially get in the way of his plans, first and foremost. It makes it a lot harder pretending to love Sydney when he starts hacking up stupid fucking rose petals whenever he thinks about you. And god forbid if he has a coughing fit when he's doing Ghostface business.

It's a pain to hide, but Billy is nothing if not determined. Not even Stu knows, that's how badly he wants to keep this a secret. It's not something he plans on hiding forever, of course. Once he's killed Sydney, he'll... probably get around to doing something about the roses piling up in a random shoebox in his room.

The thought of killing you certainly crossed his mind, don't get him wrong. It would probably be much easier having you dead than leaving you alive and dealing with this, but the moment he even processed the thought, he was falling out of bed from the sheer force of the coughing fit that hit him. It's the most roses he's ever thrown up at once, so. He threw that thought out almost immediately.

But he'll definitely play it off and act as if he isn't painfully pining for you if you ever find out about this little predicament. He's too prideful, too hesitant to ever fully commit to a person. The roses bloodied roses in the beat-up box are the closest he'll ever get to confessing his love to you.

BO SINCLAIR

Bo knew letting you live would bite him in the ass one of these days, he just wasn't expecting it to be like this. He knew he had a bit of a soft spot for you, though he loathed to admit it, even when his brothers give him knowing looks.

You just looked so damn perfect, all scared with tears streaming down your face. How could he not want to keep you around a little longer? He just didn't actually expect himself to grow attached. It was supposed to be a sadistic game, a way for him to torture you. Instead, he was the one being tortured.

Tortured by these damn flowers he keeps coughing up. He had to ask Lester what they were, though he obviously didn't mention why. Nobody was going to know about this, not Lester, not Vincent, and certainly not you. This was going to stay between him, and the bloodied petals of honeysuckle that he keeps hidden in the gas station.

He knew well enough that this little problem wasn't just going to go away so easily. Don't get him wrong, if he could kill you, he would. The thought alone is enough to keep him locked in a room, throwing up flowers until he sees dots in his vision. So clearly, he can't. He's undeniably stuck with you now, whether he likes it or not.

What's worse is he'll never have your love. Why would he? You'd be a fool to ever fall in love with him after everything he has put you through. He'll only ever have your fear.

ETHAN LANDRY

He wholeheartedly did not expect to fall in love, especially with someone inside Tara and Sam's friend group. What's worse is that it wasn't a 'normal' way of falling in love either. No, you stole his heart the moment you stabbed him while he was under the mask, growling out a threat so cruel, so gruesome, he was definitely going to steal it in the future.

The wild look in your eyes was a stark contrast to how you usually behaved, and that excited him. Honestly, how could he not fall in love with you after that? With Ghostface, you were aggressive, almost animalistic in the way you would fight for your life. With Ethan, you were concerned for his safety, even if you did eye him with suspicion like everyone else.

The flowers were annoying though, he can't lie. It's not fun coughing up tulips, especially when he's under the mask. It also makes it harder to hide his identity. Ethan honestly doesn't seem like he'd hide his coughing fits from you because he'd probably thrive under your concern. That means that if he slips up and has one when assuming the Ghostface persona, his identity is basically revealed and it ruins everything he and his family have been working for.

He'll make up excuses as to why you can't be killed. You're not even that close to Tara or Sam. Honestly, he wouldn't consider you to be part of the friend group, so your death wouldn't have any impact on them. You've unintentionally helped them with their plans by being Ethan's alibi whenever it wasn't him under the mask, so killing you just wouldn't make sense. He's not exactly the best at hiding his feelings for you.

And Ethan is well aware that given his second identity, he'll never have a chance with you. The moment the inevitable unmasking happens, he'll lose any kindness you may hold for him. That thought alone is enough to make the tulips force their way out of his throat, but he won't lie... it's exciting to think about how you might react once it's revealed that he's Ghostface.

[thesupreme316]

aew wrestlers x female readers and their favorite positions in bed?

darius martin, dante martin, daniel garcia, hook, action andretti, ricky starks, eddie kingston, and i know they're not in aew, but could you add drilla moloney & charlie dempsey 🙏

AEW STARS AND: Their Favorite Sex Positions (18+)

Pairings: Darius Martin X Female Reader, Dante Martin X Female Reader, Hook X Female Reader, Ricky Starks X Female Reader, Daniel Garcia X Female Reader, Action Andretti X Female Reader, Eddie Kingston X Female Reader, Swerve Strickland X Female Reader,

Word Count: 1.3K

Supreme Speaks: heyyyy (sorry for being late per usual). thanks to my tumblr bae @hooks-martin for the request (for the last two, I didn't know anything about them but I traded them for swerve). i think this is the most explicit imagine of mine so plz take it easy on me. anyways, please remember that you are loved and appreciated. ALSO HAPPY HOLIDAYS

Warnings: Mature content (if you are a minor, please do not read), explicit content and images, explicit language and indications

Taglist: @hooks-martin @hookerforhook @batzy-watzy @wwenhlimagines @triscillal @cassie0sstuff @sheinthatfandom @eddie-kingstons-wifey

**All the positions and their names be referenced from this website**

Hook: Cowgirl

I can just see it

Him on his back looking up at you and admiring the view; with a smirk

BUT DON’T GET IT TWISTED

He is very much in charge

Will command how fast or slow you go; he doesn’t care about the speed….but will change it if he’s punishing you

“You can ride me a lot faster can’t you baby girl?”

If he sees you getting tired (or he is punishing you), he will just drill up into you with no mercy (you’re riding a jackhammer now)

Frequently brings you down to kiss you (Watering Can position)

Loves it when you scratch his torso; it’s like you're leaving your mark/brand

I CAN SEE HIM REACHING UP AND CHOKING YO-

Just to see you squirm a bit more, he’ll talk in Italian

Tw: google translate

“Prendilo per me tesoro, so che puoi.” (Take it for me baby, I know you can.)

Action Andretti: Bizet

Again like I have said in the past

Man’s a sweetheart but also very shy

This is the perfect position since he probably might clam up if he looks into your eyes

Not in a bad way ofc

From this position, you can’t see him blush

So he wants to be as close to you as possible

And he also wants to be able to slip in at any given chance

I think he prefers slow thrusts so you both can feel everything and take in the moment

Loves to whisper in your ear

“It’s almost like your body was built for mine”

I see him as a tits person, so he squeezes them from behind

…

After careful consideration, yeah my answer is still the same he is a tit person

OVERALL HE IS A SWEETHEART

Dante Martin: Reverse Cowgirl

MMMMM THIS IS MY DREAM SO EXCUSE ME FOR THE PRIVAT-

MANS IS A ASS PERSON

Smacks/gropes your ass whenever

And is a switch too idc what you say; So I think this position gives you both control in a way

If he’s the sub, you’re controlling the pace and more so focused on your pleasure by rubbing yourself

If you’re the sub, MORE ASS SMACKIN not hard or anything (he’s a soft Dom if anything)

I also believe he will pull your hair back to the point your back is on his chest (just walk with me) and he pistons into you

Is a dirty talker too

“Fuck you feel incredible. Come for me”

But tbh I see him more as a sub in bed so…he slightly whimpers and whines in my mind

Will ask you to turn around so he can see your face

Like I said prior, he’s soft so I cannot see him being harsh or rough in bed

Darius Martin: Forbidden Fruit

Teehee

Man is a giver; A GIVER I TELL YOU

Giving you pleasure to the point where all you’re doing is screaming and losing your breath?

Teehee he lives for that

“You taste amazing love”

Loves it when you are on top

Eventually, the position turns into tiramisu or you riding his face

I don’t think he’s a sub all the way but more so a switch who really wants to please you

Tell Darius what to do an he will do it with no hesitation

For an “actual” position, I think he would love the scissor position

It’s very intimate for him and it gives him access to his favorite parts of you

I also think it would be the best position as he can see your facial expressions and give you extra stimulation

Again Darius would be all for your calls and satisfaction

Ricky Starks: Oasis

LITERALLY IT’S UP HIS ALLEY

He can see everything

Tits, Ass, Face, Neck, etc.

He likes to be up close and personal with you so he can kiss you at any point

Also, it’s easy likes to motorboat you

Side note; we all know he likes to be called daddy

So yes he will be referring to himself as Daddy

“Look at you being daddy’s good girl”

Sex-wise, Ricky is a full Dom you cannot make that man into a sub

if you do, he is the brattiest sub ever

Mostly a soft Dom but will turn up the (h)eat when necessary

He just loves being in control (speed, position, etc.)

SUCH A FUCKING TEASE; will intentionally slow down just to see you whine and beg for more

I think he will also convert Oasis into the cowgirl position

Overall, don’t give Ricky too much power

Eddie Kingston: Temptation

Okay let's have a real moment (pulls up chair) This man is so selfless that it’s crazy

For the most part, I can see him as a missionary man, because of the fact that he doesn’t want you to put in work

With temptation, he can see your face and know if he’s truly giving you pleasure

It’s also the perfect position to touch all the parts of you that can give more stimulation

AND YALL CAN DO IT EVERYWHERE

Eddie is a Dom; both a hard and soft Dom

He doesn’t want to go too harsh on you (unless you want it)

Control doesn’t matter to him tbh

Will actually do anything you ask him to because he’s so hung up on pleasing you

LOVES IT WHEN YOU TOUCH HIM OR SCRATCH HIS BACK

“Touch me like that again”

Will ensure that you have more orgasms than him

Eddie is a selfless man and puts your needs over his

Daniel Garcia: Chibi

We all know that DG is a switch (man is a bratty sub let's be honest)

But more important he is an ass man

Chibi stands out the most for me to him

With the position, he can go the pace either you or he wants to go

He can also grab or smack that booty whenever

GOES CRAZY WHEN YOU MAKE EYE CONTACT WITH HIM

I can also see him in the Nirvana position

With Nirvana, he can kiss your legs

I wouldn’t say he has a foot fetish but at the same time yeah he does

WHICH IS THE SEXIEST PART OF YOU IN HIS EYES (besides the ass)

Take the time to appreciate other parts of you

I wouldn’t say he’s a dirty talker but he’s definitely a moaner

….

Even my ass can see that and I need glasses

Swerve Strickland: Doggy Style/Downward Dog

Okay….let me dream real quick

THIS MAN? IS A HARD DOM ALL THE WAY WE ALL KNEW FROM THAT DAMN DEATHMATCH

This man is my baby daddy/sugar daddy and he wishes to be called as such

You? You’re either a slut or a princess in his eyes (I’m bot-)

Loves Doggy Style cause it gives him so much control

Will pull your hair and lean down to whisper in your ear

“You like that, don't you? Lucky for you, I could do this forever.”

Will also pull you up until your back reaches his chest

OR OR

He will put your face down further into the mattress and make you arch your back for him (Downward Dog)

Loves to smack your ass and hear your muffled screams

Will overstimulate you until you tell him to stop

AND HE WILL LOOK OVER AT YOUR PANTING AND SWEATY BODY WITH A SMILE

otay…I’m done

[quinklequonkle]

I CHALLENGE YOU 🫵🫵

Ren headcanons with a dominant MC

AAAGGGGHHH EHEHEHWHHEHEHEHEHRHDHHR

No one's ever asked about my headcanons before! I'm all giggly and shix

Let's get to it shall we?

WARNING: contains manipulation, Stepping on the pp, degradation, and overall being a biiiggg meanie to Ren

-Ren thinks he's the one in control here but he just doesn't know what he's gotten himself into

-After being in his care for a couple of weeks, he noticed something wasn't as he expected to be. The way you addressed him was casually mean, bossy, and even a bit condescending at times yet... he didn't feel as though he should punish you for it.

-Usually this sort of thing was sure to piss him off but Instead he felt... Put in his place? It's almost as if he didn't mind the treatment he received from you. This was working in your favor, the pieces were falling into their rightful place

-The first time you demanded something out of him you surely thought he would snap but you were instead pleasantly surprised by eager compliance and an even happier trot

-At first you had to ask and practically beg him to get what you wanted, but you soon learned that throwing in a sweet affirmation or two changed his tune real quick. Asking became optional and demanding became your go-to.

-Soon he was at your every beck and call, not even realizing that the dynamic had dramatically flipped. The metaphorical collar on his thin snapable neck

-Wanted breakfast in bed while you flicked your hand vaguely in the stairs direction? He already knew what that meant and had it in hand. Wanted him to drop what he was doing so you could have him fawn over you while you do nothing? He doesn't even remember what he was doing beforehand as he tends to you.

-Whether he acknowledged this switch or not didn't matter. but oddly enough he did seem happier with this arrangement, as if it were something comfortably familiar.

NSFW headcanons:

-WHAT A WHINY MAN

-Go anywhere near his ears and he's pleading at you to kiss, lick, or even bite them

-And even more fuss just from you barely even stepping on his hardening cock.

-It was pathetic in the most adorable way, you decided to throw him a bone. Ya gotta treat your pet at some point!

-Trapping his cock inside you cause him to becoming squirmy. Kneading his claws into your skin as he begs to have some sort of release from you.

-"What a selfish creature you are, be a good patient fox boy for me and you might just be rewarded."-

-You could tighten your hand around his throat and he'd eat up every interaction and every word. Desperately trying to grind against you

-his protests mean nothing because after every sensual session he thanks you for it

-he can cope tbh

-Congrats! Ren is successfully your bitch :^)

[seerofmike]

Mike's Media Medley; September and October 2024

so it turns out having 3 jobs and being a part time student means i dont wanna do anything ever so this will be kind of a lightning round in which i just state some brief thoughts and give a score on all the things i experienced for the very first time in september and october 2024.

Movies (2024 releases): Blink Twice, My Old Ass, Transformers One, Saturday Night, The Wild Robot

Movies (non-2024 releases): Rear Window (1954), In The Heat of the Night (1967), Tár (2022)

Video games: Touhou Mystia's Izakaya (2021), Cult of the Lamb (2022), Sonic x Shadow Generations, Balatro, and Mouthwashing (2024)

Blink Twice

this is zoe kravitz's directorial debut and im gonna be honest this kind of slayed. i saw some people complain about how long the build up goes but i think the build up makes the twist work even better. speaking of the twist PLEASE take the warning at the beginning of the movie very seriously.

really enjoyed it and might watch it a second time to see if i can pick up new details but i think seeing it two times will exhaust its appeal to me, i think that's like the max i can enjoy it. really good movie but it hinges on the twist.

btw the title card popping up EXTREMELY briefly during a camera flash? 10/10 no notes

77.5/100

In The Heat of the Night (1967)

i think this movie is like, Fine. definitely a solid movie with good performances. i think the cultural context it was made in elevates it and i understand how BOLD this movie would've been back in the 60s (especially when sidney poitier slaps a white man) but as far as like. police procedurals/mystery solving etc goes its not my favorite but that's not necessarily the point.

decent watch, made better with the cultural context of its time

65/100

My Old Ass

this movie was ALRIGHT and i barely remember anything about it. i didn't hate it i don't think. i didn't love it. i think only one moment made me truly laugh and i can't even remember what that moment was.

40/100 on the basis of me liking it i.e it didnt piss me off like some other movies ive watched but maybe the score should be lower because i dont remember a thing about it idk

Rear Window (1954)

i meant to watch this in theaters for its 70th anniversary but i had to work both days it was showing so i rented it from my local library. this is my first hitchcock film and i thought it was REALLY good, definitely way better than i was expecting based on plot synopsis alone but that just shows i was a fool sorry for doubting alfred hitchcock

that being said watching old movies rly makes you notice how many young women get paired up with men twice their age and its narsty and i wanted the mc to die for most of the movie. im only half kidding. didn't care so much for the personal drama side between crusty ass man and his girl tbh

incredibly good suspense. might watch it again but idk if i would like it as much on repeat viewings

80/100

Saturday Night

i couldnt understand a word anyone was saying in this movie because of weird sound mixing and how intrusive the music was especially at the beginning which feels rly uh bad considering how talky this movie is.

wish i could give it a higher score but alas i didnt hear 75% of the plot or jokes which SUCKS because I AM RACHEL SENNOTTS BIGGEST SHOOTERRRRRR

40/100

Tár (2022)

i was kinda bored by this. i got the point i just got bored. i dont rly remember much except thinking it was incredibly funny she got punished by the narrative into orchestrating video game concerts

technically very well made and cate is obviously putting her pussy into this it was just not for me.

45/100

Transformers One

now this is what im fucking talking about

i didnt think i remembered much about transformers but i watched this w my mom and the whole time we were going omg starscream omg soundwave omg i am optimus prime yassssss

choreography is fucking epic. jokes landed for me 75% of the time. but the obvious highlights are the character development and backstories for optimus and megatron. this movie was epic and you should watch it for free on your favorite pirate website because fuck paramount lives and SHOUT OUT TO BRIAN TYREE HENRY OF LEMON FAME WHO HASNT MISSED YET IM GONNA WATCH ATLANTA ONE DAY KING I PROMISE

85/100

The Wild Robot

gorgeous movie. lupita fucking killed it. cried at the end. dont think i would rewatch it much but i greatly enjoyed it. no notes go watch it

85/100

viddy games

Balatro (2024)

girl help

Cult of the Lamb (2022)

ADORABLE art style, lots of mechanics but not necessarily very in depth. the perks just feel kinda eh but i love the aesthetic and the music. also usually not big on things with religious themes but i let this one slide cuz its a cult doing. bad cult things LOL. also i love my little guys

Mouthwashing (2024)

theres literally so much i want to say about mouthwashing but what can i say that hasnt been said already...ill save it for my end of the year review because it is DEFINITELY making my top 7 unless these final 6ish weeks of the year are full of fucking bangers

Sonic x Shadow Generations (2024)

ok so i never played the og sonic generations much, i rented it on redbox once and my brother rented batman arkham city at the same time and we had one xbox so i barely played that thing before we had to return it becuz his stupid ass hogged it all weekend and im not bitter about this still at ALLLLLLLL but god i fucking love shadow the hedgehog so much hes truly the little guy ever

Touhou Mystia's Izayaka (2022)

so i haven't sunk a WHOLE lot of hours into this game because i keep getting distracted by other things but i think its VERY cute and chill and pretty fun and i might be tempted into the touhou project dark side maybe

[luminouslywriting]

Hi. Hope you’re doing well after your surgery. Wishing you a speedy recovery!

I feel like you’ve mentioned previously a little something about Brady and brat taming. I’d love it if you could maybe expand on that?

Please and thank you!

Thank you sweetheart 🥰🤍🫶🏻 much appreciated!! And darling, I’d be HAPPY and thrilled to expand on this particular topic haha! More under the cut, cut for length, paragraph form, spice under the cut:

John Brady is a man who knows what he wants when he wants it and there’s some slight authority and soft dom! Energy going on here anyway. And we know that he's a handsy person who gets turned on by a plethora of things tbh. That being said, I think that when it comes to his S/O being rude in public or acting very childish/young, he's absolutely a brat tamer.

We're talking about edging to the point of you apologizing for said behavior, spankings to multiple parts of the body, light pinching of breasts, and love bites in some tender places. It's (mostly) fun punishments for acting that way because in public, he prefers to have a solemn and strict attitude—he wants people to think the best of both him and you and doesn't want to feel like he has to keep an eye on you at all times.

However, other times is triggered during sex when you're getting particularly whiny or needy and not being expressive of what you want. This might warrant some light hair pulling and the same of the aforementioned behavior. Absolutely wants you begging and is a service top during this particular time.

He never gets rough with the brat taming. But there is this certain look that he gets in his eyes that just leaves you knowing that you're in for it. Whether it be a quick closet rendezvous where he's pocketing your panties and leaving you nearly in tears because THAT was NOT enough—or whether it be bending you over his knee at home because you weren't as gracious as you should have been—he just gets really into it.

But before we go too far, let me be the first to say that he's quick to apologize for any pain that you might be experiencing and he makes sure that he didn't actually hurt you. Once that's established, the brat taming likely becomes a game between the two of you, much akin to cat and mouse. He finds thrill in the chase and deep satisfaction and affection in the afterglow of everything as well. Rest assured, you'll be well taken care of and won't mouth off for a long time haha. Or maybe it'll be the next day, given whether or not you enjoyed said brat taming or not.

[lost-girl-2021]

Can you write a one-shot the day Spider would be taken care of by Lyle in another AU? His first meet with the Rekoms, them convincing him that Miles sr. Is not a bad person etc.

Okay, was originally writing this with Spider at like 10/11ish, but ended up writing him closer to 6-8ish. But, just imagine whatever age you'd like tbh.

Spider wasn't hungry. The big man— Uncle Lyle —had made him a PB&J, but he hadn't cut the crusts off and Spider didn't want to be a baby and ask. The thought of peeling the crusts off himself or trying to eat them made him feel kind of puke-y. His appetite was completely gone.

Appetite was a vocab word. Spider was really good at big words, his teacher said so last Thursday. He even got a gold star on his last test.

He didn't even know if he'd see his school again. His godmother's house had been twenty whole minutes away from the school, but his neighbor, Mr. Sully, drove him both ways, so it wasn't so bad. They sung songs each way and sometimes Mr. Sully would pretend to play an invisible guitar during stoplights. The apartment was even longer away, so maybe he was too far to go to school now. Maybe he'd never get to check out another library book ever again.

He wished Mr. Sully had come with, or Neteyam. The younger boy always checked under the bed for monsters when Spider slept over and would ask his dad to cut the crusts off Spider's PB&J's when Mr. Sully forgot. He'd do all the talking when Spider got scared and he could talk to Uncle Lyle. Maybe, then, the man wouldn't stare at him like he was an alien from his spot across the table.

"So . . . I have your bedroom all set up. And we're going to see your papa in three days. How does that sound?"

"I thought my dad was dead." Spider whispered, wiping his nose with his sleeve. He'd stopped crying before they even got to the apartment, but his nose kept running.

Uncle Lyle jerked back, eyes wide. "No! No, no, of course not, buddy."

"Then . . . then why 'ave I never seen 'im?" He mumbled. "I dunno what he even looks like. 'Teyam says he's Darth Vader and he always wears a mask."

"Your dad isn't Darth Vader." The man insisted, leaning closer. "He's just been in time-out for a long time. I was too, so that's why you were with the McGregor's up until now."

"Yeah, I guess . . . " Spider didn't feel very convinced. "B—But only really, really, really bad guys get put in time-out for so long. So, maybe he is Darth Vader."

Uncle Lyle sighed. "Kiddo, I promise he's not. He . . . a long time ago, when he got in trouble, he took half of everyone else's time-out times and added them to his. So that we— so that I could come and get you sooner. So, he's not a bad guy, he's just . . . he's getting punished for extra long so he could help his friends."

"But, we can visit him, even though he's in time-out?"

"Yes. In three days. He's been wanting to see you for so longer, buddy. He's gonna be so happy."

"And . . . and he's not a bad guy? Just . . . just in time-out?"

"Yes."

"And he wants to see me?" Spider asked, less hesitantly this time. "Because . . . because why?"

"Because you're his baby. And he loves you the most in the entire world."

"Oh. Okay." He nodded to himself. "That makes sense."

[lambergeier]

2023 bookpost 🥳🥳🥳

43 books read this year! about 2/3rds of last year's number, but i fell off pace in summer and for the last two months and never actually have a target or care about my pace anyways, so 43 is a good solid number imho. as last year, full list with light commentary below, recs are bolded:

JANUARY

Neuromancer by William Gibson

The Browns of California: The Family Dynasty that Transformed a State and Shaped a Nation by Miriam Pawel (i am punished for my desire to learn more about the two governors brown's effects on the state of california with: family hagiography. should have known tbh)

Between Two Fires by Christopher Buehlman (SOOOOOO GOOD. apocalyptic/religious horror in 1350's france during the black plauge. for fans of the terror, and fans of people who are in love but for whom the love won't alwayshelp!)

The Mirror and the Light by Hilary Mantel (hilary ilu u were one of the greatest novelists of the past hundred years it was an honor to be alive at the same time as you. this could have been 200 pages shorter. ilu tho)

Did Ye Hear Mammy Died? by Seamas O’Reilly (short, sweet childhood memoir of the irish writer/comedian who, famously, tweeted that story about meeting the president of ireland on ketamine.)

FEBRUARY

Either/Or by Elif Bautman (girls can i tell you. i didn't realize this was a sequel until like 100 pages into the book. that was on me.)

Two Doctors Gorski by Isaac Fellman (ah mr fellman. lol)

The Swimmers by Julie Otsuka (really cool piece of fiction, first half told from the collective viewpoint of a group of regulars at a public swimming pool, second half about the one specific swimmer who's losing her independence to dementia. short, packs a punch)

Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier (UNDEFEATED!)

One Man’s Terrorist: a Political History of the IRA by Peter Finn

Nightcrawlers by Leila Mottley (love to see local 22yos succeed wildly. does NOT mean this book was good god bless)

MARCH

The Memory Police by Yoko Ogawa

The Passenger by Cormac McCarthy

Stella Maris by Cormac McCarthy (to be clear, if you are not a cormac mccarthy fan, these books will not make you his fan. they are very much about this man's incredible hopelessness regarding a world that has invented and used the atomic bomb. what can be redeemed, etc etc. i loved them, despite a major part of the plot being consensual sibling incest, they were beautiful and phenomenal, they were not light reading)

APRIL

A Smile in his Lifetime by Joseph Hansen

Glory by NoViolet Bulawayo (cannot recommend the audiobook highly enough. emma read the paper copy to catch up to where i was in the audiobook so we could listen together on a car trip, and she agreesTM that the audiobook is the way to go)

MAY

Barbarian Days by William Finnegan

The Dark Lord of Derkholm by Dianna Wynne Jones

JUNE

We Don’t Know Ourselves by Fintan O’Toole (really really really cool nonfiction about ireland since the 1950s, part autobiography, more parts cultural history of a very quickly changing nation. fascinating to read this within 12 months of finn's one man's terrorist, which was a very leftist history of the IRA, and keefe's say nothing, which was an only very slightly leftist history of the IRA that was most interested in like, how compelling the history is (not a drag on it). o'toole not as big on the IRA as the other two! understandable!)

JULY

The Binding by Bridget Collins

The War That Killed Achilles by Caroline Alexander (for all fans of the history of the story of the illiad!!! short and passionate!)

Flux by Jinwoo Chong (solid new debut scifi - who thought it could still happen!)

I’m Glad My Mom Died by Jeanette McCurdy

The Witch King by Martha Wells (this book sucked ass!!! have mentioned this several times already this year!!!)

An Oral History of the New York Commune, 2052–2072 by Eman Abdelhadi and M. E. O'Brien (some things about this book were fun, many were infuriating, absolute worst had to be the insistence that in the future: therapy would solve even more problems that it does today :))

The Last Samurai by Helen DeWitt (see my beautiful wife's post on the subject)

Stay True by Hua Hsu (beautiful, deserves the pulitzer, not 100% my thing but still very good)

AUGUST

Demon Copperhead by Barbara Kingsolver (the voice was hard to get used to for the first 50 pages, but i ended up really liking this tbh. i've never read copperfield, so not sure if that improved the experience)

Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner

The Boys by Katie Hafner (a mistake to read this, but at least the twist was funny! there wasn't anything else in the book, but only a partial waste of time at the end)

Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin (finally read this, which has truly polarized my extended social circle, but i ended up liking it. i didn't always get what it was doing 100% of the time, and didn't so much feel compelled to find out, but i tore through it and will always be a sucker for a story about that doesn't fix you but does keep you alive. can see both sides of this debate)

American Overdose: The Opioid Tragedy in Three Acts by Chris McGreal (we have to kill every sackler. solid history of the epidemic. EVERY sackler.)

SEPTEMBER

The Season by Kristen Richardson (half-baked history of the debutante social ritual. but, not like there's many other histories of the subject!)

All the Horses of Iceland by Sarah Tolmie

Big Swiss by Jen Beagin (funny, contained extensive dirtbag lesbian behaviors, but lacked some heft at the end)

In Memoriam by Alice Winn (do you s2b2? do you want some solid, tome-like origfic? do you want all of those things and also siegfried sassoon rpf? well great news!)

Now We Shall Be Entirely Free by Andrew Miller (pleaseeeeeee tell me if you have read this or do read this it was SOOOOOO GOOD and i had NEVER heard of this guy before!!! fantastically written prose, everything builds with infinite dread to a single horrible punchline, i am still wowed thinking about it)

The Trees by Percival Everett (haha hey wanna get fucked up. dark dark dark comedy)

OCTOBER

Flowers from the Storm by Laura Kinsale (really enjoyable if slightly overlong romance novel that i got off a rec list for historical romances with disabled love interests. does a really good interesting job of giving the love interest full breadth and agency despite severe processing impairment following a stroke)

Mobility by Linda Kiesling

The Rachel Incident by Rachel O’Donahughe

NOVEMBER

NO BOOK NOVEMBER MFS

DECEMBER

Not Even the Dead by Juan Gómez Bárcena (would also like to know if anyone else has read this so we can try and figure out what the fuck was going on right at the end!! also the fact that this is primarily about mexican history, written by a spaniard, with the specter of the US very prominent in the book is like. hm i would love to be able to read some mexican press reviews of this lol)

When Crack Was King: A People's History of a Misunderstood Era by Donovan X. Ramsey (picked this up following the opioid book, which discussed but didn't go deep on how the country's reaction to the opioid epidemic was so vastly different from the crack epidemic. put a lot of stuff into context lmao.)

WAIT AT SOME POINT THIS YEAR I REREAD RUMO AND HIS MIRACULOUS ADVENTURES BY WALTER MOERS. I DON'T KNOW WHEN. DIDN'T WRITE IT DOWN. BUT I DID REREAD IT. 44 BOOKS. shout out to mr. moers for writing some extremely fucking creepy books for teenagers <3

okay i was gonna do more about like general trends and vibes of this year's books, also about the four books i am still reading rn lol, but i have been typing for soooooooooooo long so i'm just gonna reblog with more thots in the morning. stay prepared everyone

[chaosteddybear]

For Mix give us: Eros 2, Agape 1 and 5 please! 😁 And for Sasli give us: Ludus 5, Philautia 1 and 4 👀❤️

Squeee, thank you! And holy fuck, the questions you chose 😳🫣

Mix

Eros 2: How important is sex to them in a relationship? Do they see it as something essential to their happiness? Would they be able to remain in a monogamous relationship with someone they loved without sex?

You're really putting him on the spot!!!! OK, fine, I'll answer...

For Mix, sex is a crucial way to feel close to his partner. To him, it's a great way to communicate love, appreciation, need, want, value, reverence, intimatacy, trust, etc...as well as to share more situational emotions such as appreciation, longing, even anger. And he needs these things. He is very very very needy, and very very emotional about it.

The question says monogamous so I assume that by that they mean his partner isn't getting it elsewhere and neither can he. Which is a relief because if they were getting it elsewhere but not with him, then no, he couldn't handle that at all no matter what. But it's also tough for him due to his willingness/interest to fuck his friends as a way to share feelings of friendly love too - which he is happy and even ecstatic to stop doing while in a romantic partnership, but it would feel a bit odd of a rule if his partner didn't want to have sex with him themself... He may want to hear an explanation for that tbh.

However, Mix would be willing to be in a monogamous relationship without sex, yes, of course of course of course. But it would be a sacrifice for him - just like any other that he would be willing to make for the right person. What's more of a sacrifice for Mix is not being with the person who consumes his every waking thought. But beware, he will be even more needy in other ways, if such a thing is possible 😂 It might drive him a little (more) crazy if his emotional needs aren't met in other ways.

Me? I wouldn't advise it. As if he would listen to me.

Agape 1: Answered here, short answer YES

Agape 5: Does your OC find it easy to empathise with their enemies? Or do they see it as important to dehumanise them in order to combat them with sufficient determination?

Oh boy. Both? Both. Both!

So, when he first meets someone, he will evaluate them as either a foe, someone to get to know better before deciding, or a friend. Usually the second of the three options. And that's where the empathy comes in. He will try to get to know them and understand their motivations and their reasons for them. There's no reason not to! He is very stubborn and self assured. So he grants himself the pleasure of curiosity. And if he finds that there's a way to neutralize the threat without punishing the person, he absolutely will. He loves compromises, arguments, all of that.

However, if someone entered his life already trying to kill or hurt one of his pack - they skip past the empathy phase, yes, and go right to foe. Dude is acting on instinct if his hand is forced, and will protect those he loves. At all costs.

Just as rarely, sometimes they go right to being a friend. Perhaps if they're important to a pack mate and he's already heard enough about them to deem them safe and not a threat to them or the others, then of course they go straight into the pack themself once he meets them.

Sasli

Ludus 5: What seduction techniques are most likely to be effective when it comes to your OC? Are there some things guaranteed to get them going? Or are they immune to such things?

She is absolutely immune to showing off. Seriously, don't try to win her over, it won't affect her decision and may even hurt your chances if it's love you're looking for. I struggle to think of any type of seduction that would work, to be honest. I think only accidental things.

Having things or people you care about, even if you won't admit it. Distancing yourself from everyone else, because it'll force her to notice you and wonder why you're doing that, man. She may or may not like the reason, at the end of the day, though. Baffling her, making her think about you more and try to pick you apart. Doing the things she has deep urges to do too but won't let herself. Vulnerability, especially if you're trying to hide it, especially if you're bad at it (at least in her eyes). Living a life on your own that is appealing to her and she would like to join. Keep her on the edge.

However, if you're just looking for something short, flirting will work! Just make your interest known and ask 😂 she doesn't pursue when it comes to this - only for love. Mostly because she doesn't have to, so why bother? If you want your chance, just get in line and make yourself known. And teach her things! Also - casual doesn't negate the opportunity to become more later, so if you find yourself failing at the other things, try casual first then build the rest from there? Maybe it'll work?

If your next question is, well which did Mix do and why didn't it work? Well. He didn't try to seduce her at all. He just plain cares about and loves her. He did do some of the effortless things that will accidentally seduce her, but there's more to it than seduction. At the end of the day, he's just a friend. Doing all these things "right" will not guarantee anything. Afterall, there's more to who a person is than how they seduce! And Mix ain't it for her. I promise. Neither is the devil...

Philautia 1: Does your OC have a healthy sense of their own worth and value? Or do they see themselves as failing to live up to their original potential? Perhaps they are convinced of their own sinful or inadequate nature?

She isn't bothered with potential. However, she does think she can bring value. Mostly by acting a certain way.. You know, the way that makes everyone melt.

But yes of course she is always struggling with her "sinful" nature 😭😭 she's a tiefling and struggling to find balance in that, learning about her history (well, as much as possible) and trying to understand how she fits in the world, if at all.

She really finds her footing in hell, feeling so free in the HoH.

Conversely, she finds her footing in her relationship too... Being with someone who actually fans her flames? Letting loose and they actually like it? It fucking helps. Especially when it's someone she cares about and loves, and they actually like it when she's being who she is. Maybe it even helps? Maybe she can be proud of herself?

Philautia 4: Which of your OC's qualities makes them the most proud? Do they think more people should be like them in this regard? Or do they quite like being rare in possessing it?

PROUD? SASLI? Ummmmmm. UMMMMMM. Proud? Proud?

I guess her body! She gets enough attention because of it that it's hard to ignore. It's what people compliment her about the most, want her for the most, so even she can't avoid being proud of it!

Which is very ironic because she's a tiefling and it's her body that makes people villify her. How strange it must be for her to be wanted but not in a way that also gets her respect.

The ask

[aghostwithnoname]

Official Fuck Raphael/Hope Appreciation Post

Okay, so this is probably going to upset people but I don't care. I'm real sick of this "Raphael is so hot" BS. Like, firstly, that man is MID at best. Secondly, are we not gonna talk about the fact this man is a certified abuser in every sense of the word? Like, sure he's sweet-talking and clever (most abusers are imo). Newsflash: real monsters are rarely people you find unattractive!!!

What really grinds my gears is that you can stumble on Raphael making a deal with a literal child re: my sweet baby Mol and people are like, "but he's hot though". You can walk through his fucking house filled with all the poor bastards who never stood a chance making a deal with him, stuck forever being punished for their "sins", and people will be like, "Omg, my little cringe man" like??? (Holy god, that whole quest fucked so hard with my religious trauma.)

But if not the BIGGEST fucking red flag for this public adoration of Raphael is how he's treated Hope. It's like to them, she doesn't even exist!! Like, my girl has been stuck in that House of Horrors for gods know how long, still refusing to give into his charms and his sweetly worded promises of power (unlike Korilla, who gladly abuses her sister for Raphael). And Hope helps you because for once, she finally sees a way out. The personal notes kept by Raphael on Hope's torment that you can find throughout the house are difficult to read: he tried to break her in the most insidious of ways. He was physically, emotionally, and mentally abusive to her, purely for his pleasure. Purely for the reason that he finds it amusing that he can literally torment Hope in hell.

I get that we don't have to morally approve of every character we like! For comparison on liking "bad" characters, say what you want about Astarion -- He's not a great guy! He's done some pretty bad shit! BUT he was FORCED to do all of those things by Cazador. (Also, kindly fuck the Cazador apologists, seriously.) Astarion's jaded selfishness is not who he really is, which is slowly revealed when you show respect for his personal autonomy and literally the smallest amount of kindness, whether or not you romance him. Raphael, on the other hand, wants to hurt people because it feeds into his "Daddy Mephistopheles didn't give me enough attention" superiority complex -- and tbh, that's just fucking pathetic.

The REAL OG who you all should be praising is Hope.

She has been tormented for centuries. She has been victimized by her own flesh and blood for her abuser. She has been shattered and ground down into her smallest pieces until there's almost nothing left… and yet, she hopes. She hopes for freedom. She hopes that her sister will return to being the person she so fondly remembers from her childhood. She hopes she can trust you, in spite of everything she's been through. Not to mention, when you do free her, Hope is literally one of the most badass companions you can have to help you win that fight! (For all these reasons and more, she reminds me a bit of my other fav girl Karlach.)

The reason Raphael delights in torturing Hope is because hope is a dangerous thing to have when all seems lost -- and that's the entire fucking point. This scared shitless little man sought to bend Hope to his will because her persistence/resistance threatened him, and by the gods, she is my favorite NPC because of that.

As someone who has been abused, by other people, by insidious ideologies, I can never ever, ever side with someone who so clearly mimics the very things that tried to break me and kill what remained of my hope. I see myself in Hope. Her indecision, her fear, as she dares to believe freedom is a possibility. The way her dialogue is delivered (much kudos to her voice actor) directly mimics that same scared voice in my head that second guesses myself, that worries I am not enough, that my abusers were right, that I wasn't ever deserving of happiness or being alive -- and then that same scared voice cuts through it all and screams to survive out of spite, to live happily as the best form of revenge.

Again, I get that we don't have to morally approve of every character we like! I totally understand it -- but I also want you all to expend some critical thinking as to perhaps WHY so many people are fawning over a man who is so clearly is a thinly veiled piece of shit over a woman who dared to challenge him, suffered for it, and emerged victorious.

Hope is fucking amazing. She is a gods-damned survivor. She is fury and vengeance and sorrow and joy all at once. She stays in hell to help the other souls tormented and abused by Raphael. She asks that you visit her some time. She strives to create a home of out the house that was her prison… and truly, I hope every day to be more like her.

[pompelon]

They are different

If you really think the two parties are the same, and you live in a blue state, move to a red state. here's some things that are happening in mine, or have happened:

Republicans are currently trying to trick voters into passing a constitutional amendment banning ranked choice voting - our best chance to chip away at the two-party system. Democrats are currently opposing it.

Republicans are, ironically, also trying to gerrymander the process of passing a constitutional amendment to give voters in red counties more weight - because voters passed amendments they didn't like. Democrats are opposing it.

Republicans wrote and instituted an extremely strict abortion ban immediately after roe v. wade was overturned. Democrats are trying to pass a constitutional amendment to make abortion legal again.

Republicans refused to pass medicaid expansion, and then refused to fund it even after it won an overwhelming majority in a ballot initiative. This led to tens of thousands of people (including me) having no access to healthcare. Democrats led the court battle that forced them to institute the law voters passed.

Republicans are currently defending child marriage; that sixteen-year-old girl who can't get an abortion should be "allowed" to marry the man who impregnated her, they say. Democrats are trying to raise the marriage age.

Republicans have deliberately defunded programs that dispense benefits, resulting in kids literally going hungry. Democrats are trying to fund them.

Republicans have already managed to ban some forms of trans health care and are attempting to ban more. Democrats are opposing it.

Republicans are trying to make it a sex crime to support a trans minor, meaning you could go to prison and be labeled a sex offender for life. They also are trying to make sex crimes against minors punishable by the death penalty. Democrats are opposing it.

Republicans are attempting to repeal environmental regulations to allow businesses more dumping of toxic chemicals into our water without consequences. Democrats are opposing it.

Republicans are oppposed to laws that regulate puppy mills, resulting in us being one of the worst states for this form of animal cruelty. Democrats would like to regulate them - though tbh this is not high on their list of priorities with everything else going on.

Republicans are attempting to relax child labor laws so that children's labor can be exploited more easily. Children are already being found working in chicken plants. Democrats are opposing it.

Republicans are leading the charge to ban LGBTQ+ books, book about the experience of being a racial minority, or basically anything that exposes children to the idea that being white, straight, and Christian isn't the only good type of person. Democrats are opposing the bans.

I am not fond of the Democratic party, my politics are far to the left of them, but here's the thing: They are not the same as the Republicans at all. They have not lost their fucking minds. They're centrists, not leftists, but there are real, meaningful differences between living under a centrist government and living under a fascist one.

Electing Republicans in 2024 isn't going to wake up the country and cause a revolution. My state has been under Republican control for way too long, and we have not fucking woken up. You don't understand how easy it is for ordinary, everyday people to compartmentalize the suffering of others.

I think that people are doing that a little bit too when they say "both parties are the same." The child that can't get an abortion, the parent who can't feed their children, the neighborhood with toxic chemicals in the creek - these are minor abstractions - distractions from the fact that both parties are fundamentally capitalist.

Come to me honestly and say that you cannot vote for Democrats because genocide is your red line, and I will talk to you about how I struggled with that too, and why I decided to vote for Democrats anyway. But if you say that both parties are the same, you are not engaging with the truth of that decision.

[traumxrei-archive]

【 book 6 thoughts ! (2) 】

hello, back at it again w/ more thoughts on book 6 ^^ (this one's a lot longer than the first one so oops)

part : one, two, three, four / ??

[ warning !! spoilers from 6-16 till 6-35 under the cut ]

[ about : ...acting director idia.... ]

i'm sorry. i laughed when he said "i'm the BOSS". like he was doing so good on the intimidating with the "don't you guys know where you are? don't you know who i am?" and then he just HAD to say the cringiest line in all of humankind.

but tbh, it's interesting to see idia's more cynical side pop out. usually he's very self-serving, but that's bc his goals don't involve other people, his goals are usually stuff he does for himself, but after being named acting director, you can see how callous he's acting toward the other dormleaders. usually he would mind his own business in the corner, but now he's holding his ground bc he was given the authority.

DESPITE THAT. the one thing i appreciate is that he keeps on emphasizing not using unnecessary violence. one of the charons was about to blast riddle again, and he was the one who stopped that. idk it was just a gesture that stuck out to me.

[ about : the history lesson ]

it's interesting to hear that idia's family came from such...rich history. i mean, being one of the pillars of enforcement basically ? punishing those who abandoned principals ? that's a heavy cross to bear. especially with the fact that society basically abandoned/forgot them after magic became more well introduced into the world.

also malleus added that they used to lock up overbloters in the island of woe and that it was idia's ancestor who watched over the island. it begs the question, how many overbloters are kept in captivity ? like i'm sure that the old old ones died, but are there those that are alive ? or even the blot monsters of those who have died ? (since, iirc, crowley mentioned that the blot monster can outlast the overbloter if they run out of magic n die)

also. floyd brings up a good point. for an organization that works in secrecy, they sure made a really big ruckus coming in to take the overbloters. he brings up the fact that they probably have a good way of covering up all of this, which begs the question, what kind of cover up will they do ? since this is a magic world, could it be they'll wipe everyone's memories ? of styx and of the people that were taken, so people don't try searching for them ?

[ about : crewel's concern ]

crewel scanned jack n yuu for injuries before leading them to where epel + adeuce were. and how he offered to patch up yuu's minor injuries sniffs,,,, he talks tough, about how he's going to teach them a lesson n stuff, but i think it's bc he as an educator feels like he failed. he feels partly responsible for not teaching them how to fight safely ++ that they didn't try to call him for help. and the way he's so protective of them.....dad crewel agenda is actually happening everyoneeee

[ about : rook's escape ]

NOT ROOK. NOT HIM BEING WORRIED ABOUT VIL NOT HAVING SKINCARE I'M ACTUALLY WHEEZINGGG—

tbh i think he's using it as a cover up. ofc he cares about vil deeply. as a person. not just his skin. but like,,,,i do wonder why he's emphasizing the skincare so much. i think he's trying to deflect from the fact that vil could actually be in a dire situation by using the shoot and skincare as a distraction. but. rook honey.....just say you're worried about vil man.....

i do think that rook's plan is. stupid. bc why would he go alone ? he clearly has the means to find the isle of woe, but how is he going to bust through styx security without any back up ? i'm 90% sure he's acting mostly based on emotion, and that's why he's in such a rush to head over there w/o any real plan,,,,,, (sob, i was right,,,in 2-23 he talks abt how he's worried about vil and angry at the styx dudes)

[ about : yuu's plight ]

i feel. really bad for yuu bc of all they went through. first, they lose grim to the blot crystals,,,,they haven't seen him in weeks bc crowley was doing who knows what with him. and then when they do see him, he's in a cage and being taken away w/ the rest of the ob gang.

then, their home gets completely destroyed. that's only the tip of the iceberg, because they watch as their friends fight against this mysterious organization that slowly takes them away, and they can't do anything because...they don't have magic.

they arrive at the infirmary with minimal wounds while their friends are bedridden, and they can't do anything to help them. they're torn between staying and going with rook bc they're afraid they'll just be dead weight,,,,,but going anyway bc of their determination to find grim and get him back. like if you didn't think yuu was resilient before, think again.

[ about : map of the world ]

when you hit 6-23, you can see a map of a portion of twisted wonderland and :000 it's really cool to see ^^ so the closest country to sage island is the "land of dawning". there are names that i recognize n names i don't. obv we know about shaftlands, queendom of roses, and the briar valley. but we don't know anything about the kingdom of heroes, sunshine lands, or the land of dawning. i do wonder if we'll ever get to go there in future events, or if they'll forever remain unexplored.

[ about : rook's UM !!! ]

!! i think his UM is really cool !!! rook calls it weak, but i see it as a very persistent spell, and it fits well with his skillset + personality. and as epel says, it's pretty intimidating. if he has it cast on you, you wouldn't be able to lose him. like ever. and the line he says ?? "come, see if you can flee from me. arrow afar!" that's so rook ? see if you can flee from me, i mean c'mon. the arrow leaving its quiver sound as he casts it, and his confidence is so damn cool >:DD (also we are welcoming rook hunt into the rich boys club. immediately.)

[ about : STYX welcome movie ]

first off. "safe use" of technomantic technology my ASS, y'all walked into a MF SCHOOL and started zapping everyone who retaliated with stunning spells all while wearing anti-magic suits that were wwwayy too much defense for going against teens.

n the phantom database. does that mean they have a database on all the phantoms that they've been able to capture alive ? or do they...keep phantoms from before too ? magical disaster prediction, does that mean predicting overblots ? a lot of questions indeed

[ about : phantoms ]

all the talk about phantoms has me thinking back to the mines. bc that CLEARLY was a phantom that adeugrimyuu encountered at the beginning of their NRC careers. the question is, who's phantom was it, and why didn't STYX take that phantom in for research if they have eyes and ears everywhere ?

and the fact that even creating phantoms is a rare thing ? on top of overblotting being a rare thing ? i can see why STYX just had to get their hands on our ob gang, given that each of them weren't consumed + manifested phantoms + recovered fine, there might be a link between their obs that even they didn't see.

[ about : utilizing blot safely ]

ok it makes a ton of sense. now hear me out. blot is seen as this unnecessary byproduct to doing magic, and it's also harmful to the mage + those around them. the fact that STYX wants to turn this around and try to figure out a way to use blot is a natural thing. it's the same thing w/ humans in our world turning plastic bottles into ecobricks or animal manure into biofuels, attempting to turn something harmful into something useful is like. mankind's thing.

[ about : SSR Troublemakers ]

yk that's a pretty catchy name for the overblot gang. maybe i should start calling them that instead of overblot gang jskfjsdf

[ about : trials w/ riddle, vil, azul ]

okay so the first trial was in a vr space that looked like a virtual space + they were fighting ortho n the charons. they said everything was pretty normal.

they mention a lachesis system,,,,lachesis is the second of the three fates, the one who measures the length of the thread n decides how much time a human has left.

second trial, they're in the cafeteria ? oH GOD they're gonna have them fight the vice housewardens ??? isn't that playing dirty ?? ofc they wouldn't wanna fight against the people they care about. and framing it as them wanting to wrest the dormleader seat from them by dueling just adds to the betrayal !! it's natural that there's an increase in blot production, probably bc of the negative emotions they were feeling in combination w/ having to fight their friends

[ about : trials w/ jamil n leona]

trial one, vr space once more. since the results are likely the same, i won't go into details about it, but like...how are they measuring blot when they aren't using magic irl ? technically, they're only using magic in the VR world, so how come their blot levels are rising in the real world too ?

trial two, oughhh not ruggie n kalim,,,, ofc leona kingscholar and his sexy brain can see through the illusion that they wove. he starts attacking ruggie right away instead of waiting. (also i'm. his laugh. guys his laugh. ok bye) like whew the amount of levelheadedness and quick thinking this guy has in unknown situations is so ?? cool ??? and then ofc, jamil being very quick on the uptake as well, we are looking at two big brained ppl rn. (not idia getting annoyed at jamileo figuring out the system in one go—)

[ about : analysis time ! ]

imma summarize the results down below, just bc it'd be interesting to see everyone's results side by side

riddle:

pros; very quick casting, magic pool larger than avg (might be due to receiving special training when younger; magic pool built up from hard work)

cons; when he's indecisive he uses brute-force to overwhelm the enemy (an inefficient use of power), blot accumulation spikes dangerously with output, mental state is heavily impacted by surroundings (more stressed in trial two, therefore more blot accumulated)

result; high offense, very low defense -> glass canon ranged DPS (ok not idia saying riddle's a glass canon *insert moyai emoji*)

azul:

pros; good grasp over precision and control, takes in surroundings to play support, calm and efficient (could also be using others as shields), utilizes a wide range of spells

cons; slow caster, magic pool insufficient to sustain his range of spells (makes him careful with his spells)

result; cautious fighting style with precision and control -> healer that observes the field from the back

vil:

pros; the icon of stability, high manifestation speed, potency aND his magic pool is substantial, solid in both offense and defense (w/o specialized training), physically and mentally resilient (stress doesn't affect his blot much), unique magic lasts a long time

cons; nothing ??? (they legit did not have anything to say abt vil.)

result; being the icon of stability and consistency -> a tank that calls that shots for the rest of the party

leona:

pros; superior casting speeds, superior magic pool (received extensive magic instruction as a kid), efficient in using magic (tailors spells to enemy output; reduces accumulation of blot), stress didn't have much affect on blot, great mental fortitude

cons; when he does experience intense emotions, it could cause a drastic spike in blot accumulation

result; would be suited for tank but isn't a leader

jamil:

pros; efficiency over speed (similar to azul), quick and precise with defensive magic (due to guarding kalim ?)

cons; constantly worried about his reserves

result; could probably handle being in any position -> melee DPS that supports tank OR healer class

[ about : river lethe ]

HELLO. what do you mean. by "everyone who's had a run in with STYX goes down the River Lethe" ????? "that system can erase us from anyone's memory and from any data" ??? SO THIS WAS THE. so this was the countermeasure that STYX had built up. which is why they were so ballsy with their invasion of NRC.... (it's sad to think that idia doesn't even want to try making friends, bc in the end, when he becomes a researcher at STYX, all traces of him will get erased in the river lethe, so he sees no point)

[ about : grim TT^TT ]

omg GRIM beloved omg grim— oh god it's so cruel that he remembered hurting yuu and the first years all fighting for him,,,,the fact that he thinks that he got captured just bc he hurt yuu SNIFFS i swear i am not crying. i swear. i swear i am nOt sad bc he started crying and his voice sounded teary

"am i never goin' back home to ramshackle ?" HHHHHHHH im not built for this please stop my heart is literally going to break huhuhuuuuu

okAY i think this is a good enough stopping point for now, bc the next chapter is back to the rescue gang ! even though i just received the most hEARTBREAKING CLIFFHANGER IN THE HISTORY OF EVER !! stay tuned for uh. more heartbreak tomorrow *finger guns* (o yea, feel free to send stuff about book 6 to my inbox if you wanna chat ^^ i'd love to share theories n opinionsss)

[pancake-breakfast]

I've been chomping at the bit to get through the last few chapters of this volume, and finally, it is time!

Stream-of-consciousness thoughts for TriMax Vol. 8, Chapter 5 + Wolfwood Spinoff below.

Chapter 5: Parting Ways

Noooooo, who's parting wayyyys?? Everyone's finally set up to reunite!

LOL, the Punisher looks like it's taken some... punishment... in its fall from the ship.

They're looking for them! That's right, keep looking, guys!

OMG THEM <3 <3 <3 Protect him, Vash! Gods, he's soooo worried.

TBH, I think Vash is right to be shocked. I'd probably be shocked if I didn't Know Things. Gods, I don't wanna Know Things.

Aaand there's the vials! Drink 'er up!

STAMPEDE SPOILERS: I do think Stampede made the right choice in introducing those sooner rather than later. It doesn't destroy the tension around Wolfwood, because he's still Wolfwood and... well... yeah. Hard to get life-saving meds when you're not on great terms with the people who gave you the meds (and tend to go through it like it's candy).

And now he's providing some insight on Eye of Michael for Vash. And us. Good good good.

AND FOR ONCE NIGHTOW ACTUALLY USED THE BLACK BACKGROUND FOR FLASHBACKS. Gods, I wish he did this more often.

Awww, baby Wolfwood!

Also young Chapel, I guess, but I don't care about him NEARLY as much.

I mean, that's one way to train someone, I guess....

Ugh, poor kid. No one should have to go through this. He looks terrified, and probably rightly so.

Ah, there's the bit about his age not being what it appears to be.

He looks... I don't want to say "mournful" over what he's lost. More like he's already mourned it and accepted it as gone forever, and now there's just kind of a gaping hole in his heart where it used to be.

But there were more kids that ended up like him, most notably Livio, who Chapel seems to have recruited specifically as a "fuck you" to Wolfwood.

LOL, this is so them.

Vash in a blanket. Vash in a blanket!!! SOMEONE MADE HIM COZY!!! A:LGJA:OSDJ:FAJS:LDJ He needs to be cozy more often. He even has cozy slippers!

That's RIGHT, Knives! Stop trying to merge your being with your sisters! They'll win in the long run, 'cause they're used to being a hive mind.

Awww, Wolfwood's got a blanket, too. <3 Blankets for everyone.

The migration makes sense. Even in a world where communication isn't instantaneous, news spreads.

Yeah, Knives going after the envoy ships might not be so great.

Eyyy, it's our friend the gunsmith!

"Tumbleweed." That's a very apt name for Vash, all things considered.

Vash is sooooo happy to see him.

This guy. He's like, "My death got ruined by some jerk giving me a reason to live."

Ever-hopeful, ever-determined Meryl. <3

Marlon probably doesn't know it, but he's providing Vash with more than just a weapon here. Given how poorly their last meeting went, Vash probably expects Meryl to hate and fear him, but by telling him this story, Marlon lets Vash know Meryl still has hope in him. Enough hope to want him to be protected.

OMG, he's gonna repair the Punisher. He calls repairing the Punisher child's play. Who is this man?!

Vash, still looking tired and wan, but also looking hopeful again.

(Also, I love his floofy hair throughout this whole chapter. You can really see where Stampede took their inspiration.)

Geez, is Knives even absorbing dead Plants? This is not good. For him, I mean. It might actually work out ok for other people.

Is... is Knives trying to kill himself? Or just part of himself? The part of himself that feels sympathy for Vash despite the destruction of all the Plants? Does he even realize how many of these Plants would probably still be alive if it weren't for him "rescuing" them??

Epic Wolfwood spread! Looks like Marlon got the Punisher back in tip-top shape. (Hats off to @trigun-manga-overhaul for all their work stitching together pages like this.)

Noooooo, don't leave, Wolfwood! Vash needs you around! Have you learned nothing?? *SIGH* This means they're not gonna be getting the band back together, doesn't it.

Wolfwood Spinoff: Freed Bird

I'm glad he's free... but... I don't want him off on his own.

Ahhhh! I'd heard he whittled things but wasn't sure if it was true!

For reference, the ガタ ガタ (gata gata) sound on the right-hand panels is the sound of Wolfwood's knife, and the キ キ イイイ (ki ki-iii) sounds on the left-hand panel are bird cries.

Yeah, flying does a number on one's metabolism. There's a reason birds are poop machines. As anyone who's ever owned a bird knows.

LOL, this driver's like, "I'm glad you're an artist, but I need to get paid in cash."

I wonder where Angelina is....

Wolfwood's already making friends, I see.

Is Wolfwood blushing as he watches her?

Ah, trading women as products is common enough that she doesn't even flinch at the suggestion.

This is a shitty situation, since chances are he gets the Plant in the marriage anyway. Either way, she loses.

I'm beginning to think Wolfwood's not the "freed bird" referred to in the title.

*cue MAPPA flying bird reflected in a close-up of an eyeball scene*

Oh, no. Wolfwood has a soft spot for orphans.

Ah, seems like she's made her choice. Not because it's the choice she particularly wants to make, but because it's the only choice she knows how to make.

Haaaahahahahahaha, she thinks he got to choose his own path. He carved his road to his own path in literal bodies and blood.

I dunno, man. Different strokes for different folks. Something something "give me the freedom of the starving wolves." We all make sacrifices, and we have different opinions on what we're willing to sacrifice. I'm sure Wolfwood would prefer a life of not wandering around, wondering where his next bed and meal will come from, but he should know he chafes under collars and leashes.

You can't believe she doesn't remember you? When did she last see you??

Hahahahaha, he's so determined. He looks angry, but apparently the baby enjoys mad-dogging him back.

Yeah, she's not exactly walking here. She's not gonna remember you from that, Wolfwood!

LOL, eat the bird.

Oh, so this orphanage also adopts their kids out to actual families? Who knew? I thought they were all just Eye of Michael fodder.

Aww, toddler version of Maylene doesn't want to leave big brother Nico.

Now I'm thinking he was blushing at her not because of any attraction, but more out of pride at how much she's grown.

Oh, great. Who's this clown??

Ugh, it's the loan shark. He looks skeevy.

Uhhhh, what happened to Wolfwood? Who's this chick?

Oh, it's Maylene. She looks ready for a fight. Why was she chillin' in a dark room like that?

This panel, tho.

Why'd they beat him up?

Oh, they think he convinced her to refuse the offer? Man, this loan shark guy is dumb. I got the distinct impression she's never liked him. But of course it couldn't be because of anything he's done. It MUST be someone else's fault she's rejecting him.

Duuuuude. This guy assumes Wolfwood somehow seduced her, and he's ready and willing to kill both Wolfwood and Maylene if he did. Seems like GREAT husband material.

LOL, Wolfwood doesn't even justify his dumb-ass question with a reasonable response. You can just tell Wolfwood's head is full of murder-thoughts here.

Ah, now she's blaming him for the situation, too. Vash really has rubbed off on Wolfwood.

It's hard to tell, but I think Wolfwood is protecting her from the gunfire by keeping them both behind the Punisher.

This guy. He's got himself a tank to take out someone he thinks might be getting laid more than he is?

Wolfwood. Buddy. How dare you tell her she should have just married this guy.

Look, she'd rather die than go into a gilded cage! That's how it is sometimes! A cage is still a cage! And her purported husband-to-be is absolute filth!

Oh, good. Wolfy's coming around. At the very least, he wants to defend Maylene, and he recognizes this guy is trash. Just take a few more steps in the right direction, friend.

I get he was trying to keep her from the kind of hard life he's lived, but he's just the bird envying the person on the ground. He doesn't get that there are difficulties on both sides and you kinda have to pick your poison... if you're lucky enough to even have the choice.

He is still proud of her, despite his harsh words and narrow vision.

She may or may not recognize him, but she is aware of the impact he had on her young life.

Author Bonus Chapter

I wanna... just soak in water for a bit....

LOL, always a good plan to run away for a bit of one gets stuck being at home.

What's 1/F?

Wolfwood sure does spend a lot of time covered in blood. WHO'S FAULT IS THAT, NIGHTOW?!?!

"Silly manga" my foot... Tell that to my therapist. (Just kidding; Trigun Book Club is my therapist for this stuff. Sorry, folks!)

Archive

Trigun Vol. 1: Covers + 1-3, 4, 5-6, 7-8, 9-10 || Vol. 2: Covers + Extras, 1, 2-4, 5-6, 7-8

TriMax Vol. 1: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 2: Covers + 1, 2-4, 5, 6-7 || Vol. 3: Covers + 1-3, 4-5, 6-7 || Vol. 4: Covers + 1-2, 3-5, 6-7 || Vol. 5: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 6: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 7: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 8: Covers + 1-2, 3-4

Extra Credit: Trigun Vol. 1: Nebraska vs. Vash's Motivations, Vash's Loneliness, Vash's Depression (pt 2 of post), Soupy Brains || Vol. 2: Coin Factoids || TriMax Vol. 1: Lina, Vash, and a Haircut || Meryl, Vash, and the Pursuit of Happiness || Vol. 5: Knives, Vash, and Hatred for Humanity || Vol. 6: Coping Series: Wolfwood, Meryl, Vash || Vol. 8: The Uncoordinated Counterattack

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

Trimax Thoughts Vol. 1 Pt. 1

I'm late to this because I couldn't think of what to say other than my little joke posts. This is just more sporadic commentary as a result because I'm saving some of my thoughts for when I have more information later on.

One of my favourite panels so far fr. Please Mr. Nightow what dumb shenanigans did these two get into on the regular. Please tell me. Eriks and Lina are my new favourite comedy duo. (You know. Before bad things happen. As per usual.)

Ok so some thoughts on Vash awkwardly insisting that Lina overreacted - she didn't. Self-defense is valid and Lina was well-within her rights to kick that creep in the face, but Vash is now even more passive than he was in his attempts to mitigate violence and tragedy - he's not just throwing away his own pride and dignity, he's fumbling through expecting others to do the same, which he didn't used to do btw - which, unfortunately, makes sense. He's hidden himself away and is terrified of himself - he wants so badly to avoid being the cause of or seeing any more pain inflicted on people. But here's the thing - extreme passivity can also be harmful. There are some things you should get angry at and should respond defensively to. It reminds me a little of that part in Little Arcadia where Meryl is upset with herself for not responding with the same righteous anger towards Badwick pointing a gun at his parents the way Milly did. Unaffectedness can become uncaringness if one walls oneself off from becoming defensive of that which is important to them (tbh I think Meryl was being too harsh on herself in that scene - but it's important to note that she writes the letter to her parents after, and responds more openly and honestly in future chapters). Meryl also realizes in that arc that she can choose a path for herself that doesn't necessarily have to be in perfect keeping with her parents' - they will live through her regardless - but Vash here doubles down on his original philosophy and takes it to extremes instead. I'm finding it really intriguing that Meryl appears to be learning similar lessons to the ones Vash should be, but much earlier than he does (if he will, which I hope he will). I think that might be because they have similar ideals at their cores.

Also, lol at Wolfwood seeing the footprint she left on the guy's face and just being like "nice, kid".

I hate this. I hate this. Can he quit having his reputation be thrown back in his face for five minutes? How much must it hurt him that despite him only ever wanting to help, the image most everyone has of him is this caricature of a villain who is violent and cruel and belittling and demeaning, or else, the whispers of some calamitous being on a power scale incomprehensible to humanity, like some sort of bogeyman? And then to have him reveal all his scars in such an incredibly humiliating way - and to have that be the moment we, as the readers, have definite proof that this man is, in fact, Vash. This impostor went the extra mile to look exactly like the "humanoid typhoon" but it's those scars that are the genuine reveal of Vash's true character. He's just a guy. Yes, he's capable of being dangerous, yes, he's pretty much a living weapon of mass destruction, but he is also kind and self-sacrificing to a fault and chooses this kindness every day. He is literally just a guy. I need people to be fucking nice to him. Leave him alone.

Wolfwood already being defensive of Vash counter: 1

Grandma Sheryl really said "Get my gun." Whhfsdjhfvh

I'm realizing that when Wolfwood unclasps Punisher here, this is... the first time Vash has actually seen that it is. A giant gun. This is the first time the reader would have seen this. Hjhnsdjhvn???

The hair cutting scene hurts me so bad man. I've seen a couple people break down that scene so I won't do that here but hnnng. I love that Lina so clearly cares about him. That she wanted to keep him safe too. And even though she doesn't feel like she could do enough it meant the world to him. Augh. Aughhhh.

Meryl's birthday is in February!!! This is important information.

Ah yes, Trimax Chapter 3, or, as I like to call it, "Area Insurance Girls Destroy Workplace Asshole's Entire Career by Hitting Him With Proof that He Is a Hitman Committing Murder and Fraud, Then Hitting Him in the Back with a Projectile from a Stun Gun". (Meryl and Milly I love you and I love your teamwork. Girls <3. Again, someone broke down the whole part with Meryl here so I won't get into it.)

Wolfwood already being defensive of Vash counter: 2

Wolfwood already being defensive of Vash counter: 3 (also holy shit dude???)

(For clarity, this counter I'm keeping is because it makes me laugh - I have a sneaking suspicion I know why he's there from Tristamp - which makes the fact that he reacts like this after like. What? A few days of knowing him? - really, really funny to me. Also I'm writing up a little something I noticed about Wolfwood, and this is a bit relevant, so there's that too. But mostly it's just funny.)

Geez, Knives looks demonic in the flashbacks. It's very intriguing how he's mostly faceless. I would imagine it's some complex mix of not recognizing his brother after what he's done, not recognizing him as his brother after what he's done, and not wanting to see his twin's face (which looks like his face) staring back at him as some kind of monster. I also have to wonder if Vash is a little scared of Knives, especially after July and Fifth Moon. Also, the way Knives tries to help Vash up because they're "brothers", hence, the same, but when Vash angrily accuses Knives of not being human, Knives kicks him back down while shouting about that he wouldn't want to be like them ever. Really I think this kind of highlights the dynamic in a nutshell. Vash fears harming others more than he does about his loneliness. Knives fears being all alone, I think, and is willing to commit harmful acts to assure he won't be - Vash often winds up hurt by this. Knives doesn't. It also emphasizes how Knives' offer of sticking together is contingent on Vash being agreeable, which is. Yikes bud.

Hm. Wolfwood starts calling him "Needle-Noggin" here. He was calling him Vash before. Interesting.

Brad stfu challenge. Don't be mean to him I'll be sad :(

What is wrong with him. See, Vash is exaggerating his weirdness for the bit and also to hide intense internal turmoil. Wolfwood is clearly trying to get a better vantage to see what's happening here but, unfortunately, I also think he is just like that.

I find it very interesting that Wolfwood finds it so important to finish that particular conversation with Vash, that he even went to go find him earlier to do so. It seems he was under the impression that Vash's stance is one of passivity, but that's not true at all - Vash's whole thing is that he is actually incredibly, notoriously bad at "doing nothing". Isn't it Wolfwood who was the one who wanted to leave here? But he has a point that sometimes you have to make difficult choices. Hm...

Vash just went full chaos entity for this one, huh?

"Wow, it's great that the bullets didn't pierce through and that the equipment works!" he says as he coughs up blood from the force of being hit. :/

This is a very tricky situation, morally speaking, at the end. Vash actually seems to understand the father's reaction here. But if the man shoots his daughter's murderer then it's not just the murderer who loses his "blank ticket" - so does the father. The way the screams of the murderer look like they're encroaching and pressing in on Vash... agh. And then when he goes for the gun, the father thinks Vash is judging him but I really don't think that's it at all. I don't think Vash faults the father for his anger - he understands the cruel death of a family member and the anger that comes with it. He lets the father beat him up instead and release aggression that way, which is a very... Vash way of dealing with it. It worked this time but... that's only because the father turned out to be unable to kill him after all. Vash didn't seem like he really knew what to do here, or even what the right thing to do was. He reacted on instinct. I feel this was less bravery and self-sacrificial pacifism than it was an incredibly vulnerable moment and an apology, in a way. He can't allow himself to let people die when there's something he can do, or to have them throw their futures away. But he is also sorry in a way, not for the act of intervening, but because he knows the father is hurting badly. Idk.

This is interesting, because I think it's right, but not completely. It's less that they are all his family, and more that he has taken up what he kind of sees as the family mantle (Rem's) of saving all the people she saved during the Fall, which is, unfortunately, everyone. Poor Vash, honestly. It's hardly sustainable, and even if it was, it assures that he will always be wrapped up in torment.

I just know Vash intentionally calls Wolfwood out in a really annoying sing-songy voice every time he does something nice just to embarrass him. Hjhdfnvjh

Anyways, that's all for that; until the next volume -

WHAT THE FUCK?

[kiddphel]

do you have any recs for miguel comics??? ive been meaning to get into his comics n usually id just go chronologically, but i think youd have good recs for his comics :D

Chronologically actually works pretty well I think, cuz I do like a lot of his comics! I mean sure some of them suck but like. They're charming. And also there are like, 3 or 4 times where his universe/timeline just gets hard reset so just. Take a lot of that with a grain of salt.

His original run from 1992 is of course recommended, even despite a lot of the shitty writing at times. The art is phenomenal I love Rick Leonardi's work. And I do love the foundation for Miguel's personality and story that's built upon. He's very different to Peter Parker and it shows and it's shown in an interesting way that makes him an enjoyable character (just wish the writing wasn't so fucking overly mean to him for no reason sometimes).

There are some 2099 (World of Tomorrow) comics that show not just Miguel but the other 2099 versions of heroes but I'll be honest I haven't read those yet. I heard they were confusing. And also I think Punisher 2099 sets up a villain for Miguel's comic but god it's. Messy. I realized you asked me what's the best to read and I'm trying to give the comprehensive timeline KJDSHGJDS sorry autism moment

Going back to what I do recommend and like, it's a one shot but the Spider-Man 2099 meets Spider-Man is fun I love that one a lot. This is not at all required reading but he does join the Exiles in the 2001 run at around Issue 75 and ngl I skipped there cuz I really do like the Miguel bits in this one. He's not the main character but I think what he adds is fun :) It's a different canon from the main timeline Miguel but it's fun. Captain Marvel (1999) issues 27-30 also bring Miguel back and I think like, set up for future stuff but tbh you don't have to read this and I haven't yet so idk if it's good.

From here it gets. Messy cuz there's the 2014 run but that requires previous reading in The Superior Spider-Man but you can also technically just, skip that and start the 2014 run cuz they do kinda catch you up, but if you want backstory his stuff starts there. I did like his stuff in Superior Spider-man tho. ANYWAYS I like the 2014 run a lot. Then there's Secret War 2099. I cannot remember if I read that DSLJGHSLDJ. But from there is the 2015 run which again you can just kinda jump into and they catch you up. I like it! I think it's fun. Hate once he gets his white suit but hey. He's still cute in this run.

There is a 2019 oneshot that's... Fine. It's fine. I don't really like it but it's a hard reboot of Miguel's timeline and universe again. But not necessary reading. You can read it if you like! But I didn't care much KJLDSFHGHKF

After that there's Spider-Man 2099 Exodus which I DO really like! 2099 Exodus Alpha is actually really good and has one of my favorite covers. And then the latest run he had was 2099 Dark Genesis which I REALLY LIKE. There's Carnage 2099 and I fuckin love this one I actually own all 5 issues.

This got long sorry however I'm not done. Not a comic but if you ever wanna watch smth he's in, the video game Edge of Time is Very good and has Great Miguel characterization and dialogue. There are full playthroughs on Youtube and I really do love this game.

Ok now I'm done sorry for the TED Talk enjoy comics

[catsnuggler]

I've struggled with belonging, all my life. I don't claim to have the worst experience of that. I'm white, able-bodied, a cisgender man, I come from a Christian background (if a bizarre one, what with it being Mormonism), and I pass for straight because I'm mostly into women and haven't really made an effort to be visibly queer. So, I don't have the hardest background, I don't have the worst struggle with belonging.

I do have a struggle, though. As mentioned, I was raised Mormon. Mormons have a burning intensity on uniformity within the church. Uniform, unquestioning obedience to the church leadership, even as you're expected to admit that they are mortal men capable of mistakes and faults (likewise the treatment of the church, itself; capable of fault, imperfect, yet never admitting they actually have faults); to condemn and condone what the church organization, as a conservative settler-colonialist cult, and the church membership, which is largely an openly reactionary settler-colonialist cult, condemns and condone; the anti-Semitic and colonialist Mormon beliefs about Indigenous peoples of Turtle Island and Abya Yala; all this, and an emphasis on "The Plan of Salvation/Happiness", a checklist of everything faithful Mormons have to do to achieve eternal life, including baptism, priesthood for men, marriage, raising a nuclear family...

My family questioned the leadership and the church, even disagreed with some things; we disagreed on condoning the church's history of racism, and on condemning gay people; I eventually realized how bigoted those racial beliefs were, and discarded them, as have my siblings (my dad still believes in Mormonism, but... allegorically, rather than literally? I wish he would leave the church, tbh); and now, we arrive at my family.

My mom is dead. She died when I was 7. My dad remarried a year later, to a divorced single mother, and moved us to a different area. That marriage didn't last, by the way. She was cold and uncaring, and I felt no remorse for her when I was told there was going to be a divorce. Anyway, the people here, where we live now and have lived since that move, couldn't relate to us, for all the reasons from the previous paragraph, and because I came from a patchwork family, and my mother had died. They never said "it's your fault your mother died," but they never truly cared to make us feel just as warmly-welcomed as anyone else. We were constantly gossiped about. It wasn't because my mom had died that they didn't care, it was because they couldn't relate to me, because I didn't fit the uniform mold... because my mom was dead... I was never directly blamed, but I felt the indirect blame in their hollow smiles. Perhaps they even believed that her death was a punishment to us, an attempt to get us to reconcile to TBM beliefs, and the fact we hadn't just meant we were foolishly rebelling against God, who would surely punish us again, until we went back in line, and so they had best distance themselves from us? I don't know if they thought this or not, but they do have a general belief that complete obedience to the church is rewarded in this life and the next, while catastrophe results from heterodoxy and disobedience.

So. I wasn't accepted as a Mormon. I also moved from my old home not long after my mother's death. Mormons are generally not accepted in American society, either. I was too "worldly" for the Mormons. I was too "Mormon" for "The World". And then I gravitated to Norse paganism, where I'm still at today, and people wonder if I'm a Nazi, or if I'm a Marvel fanboy, or if I'm just dumb because Christianity superseded paganism a long time ago (as if conversion-by-the-sword; which wasn't always the case, but uh, it still happened a lot; is morally acceptable), so why am I in a religion that was conquered and defeated? Or I'm preached to. Gods. I fucking hate that so much. Or people think I'm arrogant, think that I think I'm better than everyone because I'm a pagan, like I chose it only to be exotic. I'm not in a small town in the deep south, or in the back country of anywhere, so it's not like being pagan alone, even if I keep yo myself, results in death threats, or denied job offers, or any of the oppressions Muslims and Jews know all too well; I'm not suffering hate crimes, but when I am recognized as a pagan when I wear my hammer necklace, I'm looked askance at. Not terribly awful, not inhumane, but still wrong, still alienating. If who I am isn't hurting anybody, I don't want to be treated as if I am inherently hurtful. I want to be treated as a human being - with a baseline of respect one would show to a stranger, unless, through disrespectful actions on my part, I earn disrespect in kind. I don't expect automatic honor, merely the respect of being a fellow, imperfect human being, with some measure of good and potential. I'm saddened when I am othered, and I am shocked, angered, in despair, and appalled at the actual violence faced by groups who have it a lot worse than myself.

And then we arrive at whiteness. Top of the social pyramid of racism, yes... At the cost of our souls. You're not Scottish-American, not English-American, not German-American - oh, by all means, you can call yourself those things! No problem with saying those! But being different? Actually having something outside of whiteness? Nope! It's just Columbus Day, Plymouth Rock, States' Rights, Thanksgiving, Fourth of July - oh, and uh, Martin Luther King had a dream, I guess, so you get a day off from school or a government job, but don't you bother actually really learning who he was, what he really dreamed of, how the US government harassed him and had a hand in his death. And America is always the good guy in every war, and we didn't lose the Vietnam War. But uh. No hosen, no kilts, no haggis, no maypoles, nothing from wherever in Europe your ancestors came from, Europe is... I don't know, too "gay" or something, idek. Sure, you can have some annual Scottish festival or whatever, but then it's back to being white, being like every other white person out there. "Consume, consume, consume, and kill everybody who disagrees. Fuck you, I'll get mine. I was standing my ground when I shot that car of kids that backed into my driveway to try to make a turn." Once you start learning the things your ancestors did to other people, well... how can you feel good, at all, about family history? You never really know the good stuff, whatever good stuff there may have been; it didn't pass down. You just know they were awful people. So you're lost. That is, I'm lost... and my ancestors wanted that. They thought that would be a good thing. For us, I mean. A necessary cost I would surely agree to pay, and be glad they did, for the sake of keeping others down, so we could have more in comparison. Only, I don't agree. I'm horrified they did. As I said, I'm lost.

Belonging. I wish for it.