#I didn’t really explore much of Gwen’s side to this but she definitely is someone to cut off people

[frozentothetouch]

continuation of this

[oswinsdolma]

Proving all the Knights of the Round Table have magic part 3: Elyan

I've seen quite a few people headcanon Elyan with magic before, and it's definitely one of the more popular magic!knights hcs, so I apologise if I accidentally hijack anyone else's points xx

The most obvious indicator of this is the fact that Elyan leaves Camelot a year before Merlin arrives. This is about the same age Morgana's magic shows itself, so it would be natural to assume he left because he began showing signs of being a warlock, Camelot's laws being what they are.

It is also implied that Elyan left fairly abruptly, with Gwen having no idea where he went. He may have left in a hurry because somebody might have noticed him, and not told Gwen or Tom for fear of putting them in danger.

Perhaps in a darker note, he didn't say where he was going because he was ashamed of his magic and didn't think his family would accept him.

Gwen says that "[Elyan] always seems to be in the wrong place at the wrong time". Maybe accidents happen around him because he had trouble controlling his magic and found it increasingly difficult to cover for. This could be another indicator as to why he left.

Elyan didn't return to Camelot even for his father's funeral, and while he expresses his guilt, he doesn't give sufficient reason why: the reason? He may not be able to tell Gwen because he was still scared to return with magic.

When Gwen reveals her relationship with Arthur, Elyan is skeptical, and maybe even a little panicked. After all, would your sister falling in love with someone with the power to set you ablaze not be a terrifying concept to anyone with magic? But when Arthur comes to rescue them and proves himself to be slightly less of a prat than he may think, he tentatively agrees to return home, though I suspect this is mainly for Gwen's sake.

When the immortal army invades Camelot, Elyan manages to stay hidden and fight off some soldiers. Note that he is the only one of the group within Camelot with no Knights' training, which begs the question: how did he manage to escape? The answer could very well lie with magic.

Again, in The Darkest Hour, he is one of two knights that survived the meeting with Morgana. He is one of the more inexperienced knights as well, which suggests that he may have aided himself magically in the fight.

When faced with a seemingly unbeatable threat, Elyan says to Arthur: "tomorrow, we fight in your name, sure. For freedom and justice in this land." Now there is a lot to unpack here, but if we break it down, firstly there is the fact that Elyan places is emphasis on "your" when addressing Arthur. He has previously made a statement about the Pendragon crest, but in this moment, it seems that he cares more about Arthur than this. This is clearly indicative of the fierce bond between Arthur and the core knights, but it could be more than that: the emphasis of "your" is specific to Arthur, but perhaps more importantly, it is an exclusion of Uther. In his time, Arthur has made mistakes, but he has generally been more sympathetic towards magic than his father, and this may be Elyan's subtle way of acknowledging that.

In addition, the words: "for freedom and justice in this land" could just be in reference for Arthur's abilities as king, but this is a deep speech and one would assume it has a deeper meaning. Freedom and justice are two things that have not been afforded to those with magic for a long time. Uther's twisted "justice" involved executing anyone who disagreed with him and anyone who could be vaguely affiliated with sorcery. As for freedom, Arthur has created a fairer kingdom than his father, but magic users still live in fear. Combined with the earlier stress of "your", this is indicative that Elyan too believes that Arthur may one day come to bring peace to anyone who is born with magic.

This last point also has the implications that Elyan knows of the Once and Future King and surrounding prophecies. Though he is described as a troublemaker by Gwen before he comes to Camelot, he keeps his head relatively low upon arrival. Perhaps in the time he spent travelling, he sought help from magical communities, e.g. the druids, who helped him control his powers. This would also explain his vagueness about his whereabouts and lack of contact during the years he was missing.

I could go on about this quote but we'll leave it there for now.

Before he is overtaken by the power of the Lamia, Elyan is vocal in standing up for Merlin. This could be because he knows what it is like to be shunned by society. Magic could be a reason for that. (Also I fully believe that the only reason the Lamia didn't try and take over Merlin was because she was scared of the extent of his magic, not just because he had magic.)(and the merthur reasons when I'm in the mood)

Then Elyan falls sick, before the others begin to show symptoms. Maybe the Lamia sensed some magic and decided he was more trouble than he was worth.

Elyan was not raised by druids, and does not have the same powers as Merlin so wouldn't have sensed the power of the shrine, at least not too strongly. When he first sees the spirit though, he is genuinely sympathetic, even before the murderous intent takes hold.

In the Dark Tower, Elyan is consumed by his need to find Gwen, convinced that he is to blame for her capture. This could be survivor's guilt (and to an extent, probably is), but it is equally probable that Elyan believes that he should have used his magic to protect her.

Going off on a slight tangent here, the theme of "I have magic so it must have a purpose" within warlocks/sorcerers in the show is a) not a healthy mindset and b) uncomfortably common. Elyan may have latched onto the idea that he must use his magic to protect Gwen to convince himself to stay in Camelot, and with that conprmino, he began to fall apart. His behaviour is almost identical to Merlin's fervour regarding Arthur at this point, and it's fairly disturbing that these characters adopt this mindset that is Not Good For Their Mental Heath, Please Get Some Therapy.

Elyan dies. It's heartbreaking, and he does so trying to save his sister. But what is interesting is his funeral. When most main characters die, they are given a funeral in Camelot, e.g. Uther, Lancelot (the first time). But then Freya and Shade!Lanceot (and later Arthur) are set to rest in the Lake of Avalon. The difference between the two is that the lake funerals were arranged by Merlin, and those laid to rest there can somehow be affiliated with magic.

Now I'm not saying that Merlin knew about Elyan's magic, because sometimes he can be really not very perceptive about that (though it's always fun when fics cheerily toss that out the window because it's fun goddamnit-), but I don't believe he was entirely oblivious. Think about it: there are two of Arthur's closest friends canonically hiding magic from him and it's fairly probable that they'll pick up on Elyan's magic at some point. Even if it's just little things like his sympathies with magic or gentle arguments about the way mages are treated. There are so many avenues to explore with this it's overwhelming-

I also think Elyan may have picked up on Merlin's magic later in the series: the point of realisation was probably when Merlin rescued him during his time being possessed by the drowned druid boy, upon which he says: "you know, Merlin, you're much braver than you look." This is the first time Merlin has revealed his more BAMF side to Elyan, and in this moment, something unspoken passes between them. If not mutual understanding, it is at least Elyan realising what Merlin does beneath his carefree exterior, and despite the possession, I think he acquires a lot of new respect for his friend.

(also are we going to ignore that the lake funeral implies that it was arranged by Merlin. How close were they and what stuff did we miss out on behind the scenes for him to be trusted with this?? I need to know)

Elyan and Mordred have a friendship in series 5. If the earlier headcanon about Elyan learning to control his magic with druids is true, perhaps he may have recognised Mordred from his time there. They probably didn't acknowledge it much, but it created a bond between them.

And now for the mythological context!!

Of all the Knights of the Round Table, Elyan's backstory is perhaps the most estranged from the original legend (of course all of them are fairly disconnected *flashbacks to pope-gwaine* but Elyan's is w a c k y)

As a consequence, there is little to draw on for behind-the-scenes evidence of magic.

Elyan, or Helayn, was another Knight whose origins stem from France (the Vulgate Cycle, I think, though he could have surfaced earlier). He is said to have joined Lancelot in exile after his affair of 'courtly love' with Guinevere (go and look up this concept- it gets convoluted in the myths but is really interesting in terms of both origin and content). Anyway, his exile here could represent the time he spent out of Camelot before his appearance in s3, and relates to hiding from harsh laws, particularly if we regard Lancelot and Guinevere's relationship in the same way as we do in the Vulgate Cycle (basically keep the context with the appropriate work and it sort of makes sense)

I appreciate this seems a little like grasping at straws but that's literature I suppose ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

In the legends, Elyan is nephew to another of Arthur's knights, Sir Sagramore. This knight is less famous than some, but at one point, he embarks on a quest to find the fay. The fay are closely linked with the she, and perhaps also live on Avalon, somewhere mortals are only supposed to see moments before death. Perhaps Elyan can be associated with this magic?

In reality, there is little written of Elyan and no prose or poetry dedicated to him so it's quite hard to find stuff about him.

Also legend!Elyan is heir to the throne of Constantinople, which just goes to prove how widespread and deeply convoluted the mythos is.

[goonlalagoon]

A smile in your heart (no better place to start) || Second Star to the Left

Read on Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/33459862

(Spoilers through to end of ep 10 ahead)

It’s been weeks - months - and Bell’s thought about what they could say, when they’re finally on the ground and face to face with Gwen for the first time. Thank you, that’s a strong contender; they know themselves well enough to know they’re more likely to go with how did you do it? Maybe this time they’ll actually be able to say I love you, though Gwen seems adept at picking it up even when they can’t put the words to it. In their head, they planned for it to be - not dramatic, because they’re supposed to be a fugitive and they don’t want to draw attention, but meaningful. The kind of memory that’s something to think back on with misty eyes and fond words.

Capital-R-Romantic, as Gwen termed it so long ago, that first grudging conversation.

What they actually say is,

“Wow, you really do have a great jawline.”

It’s…admittedly not the worst thing they’ve ever said to someone they have a crush on, but that isn’t exactly the metric Bell wanted to measure this by. They’re standing just feet away from each other, drinking each other in. The silence starts to shade awkward before Gwen swallows, shrugs, gives a shaky smile. Bell remembers a letter, one of the first, remembers reading the clouds are all blurry and the twisting mix of regret and guilty relief, because they didn’t want Gwen to be upset but they couldn’t help but cling onto the fact that she was, that someone was upset on their behalf.

“Well, I never got to see your school graduating photos, so I had no expectations of your jawline, Bell, but hey! It’s a pretty good one too, so congratulations!”

Gods, they’ve missed that laugh.

Someone interrupts them then, of course, because the settler ship has just landed and scout Hartley is very much in demand by everyone, not just Bell. There’s a whole crew of people looking to start a new life, and all of them need their scout to tell them what to do, where to go, what to watch out for. They wave a forlorn goodbye, find a place to sit and idly look around, trying to match this new settlement (very new, scout Summers could probably gauge to the day when these buildings were set up by the wear and tear, even after all this time) to every overheard exploit they’d listened in on over the years.

Gwen had moved the settlement into the trees, combined the natural firebreak with dug trenches to add a layer of defence. There’s a clear track that Bell would bet leads straight to water by the quickest route, an escape path to the coast. They think that perhaps the two of them should put their heads together, figure out emergency bundles for evacuation protocols. Food and water, a spare repair kit for any prosthetics…by the time they find Gwen again, hours of running around helping the settlers - the other settlers - move in, Gigo has a whole list stored. Ideas and checks and suggestions that Bell got halfway through recording before realising that maybe Gwen already thought of all of this and they no longer needed to jot everything down to cram into their four hour window of contact.

They live on the same planet, now. There’s no limit on contact, except that the first several months after settlement are absolute chaos for the scout, and from what Bell recalled hadn’t seemed likely to slow down even before the apocalypse threw everything out the metaphorical window.

Maybe with two of them with scout training it’ll be less…just less. Gwen might be able to get if not the mandated six hours of sleep at least enough to average out more at four or five. They weren’t going to comment on it, but it was easy to tell she hadn’t been getting her full rest anyway - probably hadn’t for months, dark circles under her eyes like permanent bruises.

They’re standing awkward feet away from each other again, and Bell knows there’s going to have to be a conversation about that soon, because it hadn’t really occurred to them before that they know a lot of things about Gwen, years and years of stories and rambling conversations, but there’s things you don’t learn without being in person. Personal space, definitions and comfort thereof, the body language and facial expressions to interpret to know what’s welcomed and what isn’t.

“Hey, so, uh…I know there’s a protocol that I’m supposed to follow when my settlers arrive, and all, but there’s something else I want to do instead.” Bell huffs a laugh, steals a shy glance to see Gwen’s answering smirk.

“Another sworn class tradition to fulfil?”

“Nope! We never talked that far ahead except as jokes. We knew the stats, y’know? But - you told me, the first day, that I should watch the sunrise, that that was something I shouldn’t miss, my first morning. And I don’t���we don’t have that, but I’ve had a long time to find my own wonderfully inspiring views of nature here and I wanted - Bell, you haven’t been on a planet for years and you were with me through everything, but you’ve never seen any of it in real life and I want to show you all of it, and I know where to start.”

Bell thinks about muttering about protocol, for the form of it, for the joke that can be dragged out of it, familiar banter, but they decide not to. It’s no longer their job to care about protocol, and anyway the only reason they cared about the protocol was to keep their scouts safe. Gwen is standing right in front of them, leaning gently against Boots with a casually familiar stance - if they pointed it out, Bell knows she wouldn’t even have thought about it. This is just what Gwen does, when she’s standing about with nothing to do with her hands; rests an elbow companionably atop Boots, one foot hooked around a standing leg and balanced on the toe of her boot.

Gwen is standing right there, safe and alive and happy, so protocol can sort itself, thanks.

(Bell realises they have their own hands in their pockets, their own casual stance, and wonders if Gwen is noticing that too, drinking in all of the unconcious habits that it would never occur to either of them to verbalise. All the little tics and quirks that don’t translate over a FTL comms.)

It’s not a long walk, and it’s more silent than Bell would have guessed, but it’s comfortable. Novel, really, to not have to narrate things aloud because they can just look and see what Gwen is doing, can point at a bird with a dorsal fin and pause to watch it flutter around rather than try to describe it.

They can’t stop stealing glances sideways, catching Gwen more often than not doing the same, both of them collapsing into giggles about it each time. It’s just so surreal, to be walking side by side, after all this time. It feels like a dream, like one of the stories Gwen tells Boots at night - once upon a time, there were two explorers, setting out through the trees…

The light dances on the waves, well below their cliff edge destination. At some point Gwen must have rolled a fallen log over to act as a bench, because it’s too well placed to be natural and there’s a fire-pit dug and lined with careful stones. Close enough to be cosy, but far away from the treeline itself to be safe. The light is dancing on the waves and the grass is drifting in the breeze, a periwinkle blue that Bell is used to seeing in photos if they thought of it at all. Something that had seemed so wonderful and new, when scout Hartley made her first observations, but had drifted into commonplace. A detail that wasn’t worth mentioning any more.

“One day, I’m going to make a boat and go explore that.” Gwen waves grandly at the horizon; she’s leaning her head on Bell’s shoulder, and Bell has decided that they will happily never move again. The two of them can just stay there, forever, Gwen’s head on their shoulder and the soft whisper of waves below. “Once my settlers are…settled, and can be left without supervision for more than a few hours at a time.”

“Already missing the solitude? Mourning all that lovely peace and quiet?”

“What solitude? I had a very efficient scout minder in my ear, I’ll have you know! I didn’t have time to get used to the peace and quiet before beep, time for another check in. Hartley, have you followed the itinary, Hartley, did you maintain a reasonable sleep schedule, Hartley, have you eaten a balanced meal at your officially directed time selected for nutritional optimisation…”

“I’m honestly surprised that you went for reminding me of my remote presence first rather than protesting that Boots was with you the whole time. And I would also like to ask, in the spirit of enquiry, have you done any of those things without my input?” Gwen shakes with barely suppressed laughter and doesn’t bother answering; Bell tries not to join in, because Gwen’s head is still on their shoulder and they’re still determined not to dislodge it until they really have to. “And…hey, I also told you to go watch the sunrise, and you found this instead. I - when did you find this? You never mentioned a little ocean watching viewpoint.”

“I - uh, set it up a few months ago. I didn’t know if it had worked, or if it had all gone wrong, or - and I spent so long pacing around here and wondering what you’d think of the view…”

“Aw, and you say I’m a romantic.”

“With a capital R, yes, you so are. I’m your favourite person, you said so, it was very romantic.”

“That was possibly the least romantic declaration of love that has ever been given. I congratulated you on your jawline, Gwen, I write poetry in my spare time and that was the best I could come up with. I should have just stopped talking - writing, I don’t even have the excuse of not being able to edit it out, the first bit was fine but I kept rambling.”

“It was romantic and I loved it and I have saved all of your letters in three separate back ups to make sure I don’t lose any of them.”

Bell laughs, curls an arm around Gwen’s shoulders as easy as breathing, and lets themselves relax for what feels like the first time in months. A flock of birds takes off from the trees, darting past them over the cliff edge, setting out over the waves. The sun glints off their feathers, the raised fin, a riot of colour catching the light as they watch, leaning against each other, shoulder to shoulder. Gwen is beaming out at it all, and Bell can feel their cheeks creasing to match.

It isn’t a sunrise, but this - this is something close enough, a snapshot of a new world, a new horizon that they get to learn, the first day of a new life.

[champagne-bucky]

The Undoing: Four

Summary: The truth about a past life is unveiled.

Warnings: THIS IS A DARK STORY!! dark! Steve Rogers x reader, kidnapping, non con and dub con (or at least mentions of), dark! Bucky Barnes, Stockholm syndrome, grooming, mentions of pregnancy termination and suicide mentions (for one chapter), possibly more tags to be added!

Notes: Ahhh, so here we are, part 4 and the present time in which this story takes place. I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to get shit done, but I’ve just been so unmotivated and it sucks because I had all these things planned and ughhh procrastination sucks. Anyways enjoy part 4. Please make sure to like, comment, reblog, inbox, and follow for more!! Enjoy :)

PLEASE READ WARNINGS!!

*Present time*

“Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Sasha. Happy birthday to you,” the small crowd that was Sasha’s family cheered as she blew out her candles.

Finally, her 18th birthday. A day where she is legally considered an adult. A day that her father had promised to grant her the freedoms that she saw the other kids had. A day where she would no longer be sheltered.

“Happy birthday, sweetheart,” her mother came up to the young woman and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Her father followed suit, a side hug and kiss as she worked on cutting the cake.

“I want the first piece,” one shouted.

“I want a really big piece,” said another.

The shouting amongst her siblings didn’t subside until her father quieted them down with the threat of “no cake at all.”

While her mother busied herself in the kitchen, Sasha’s father was helping his youngest children get their slices of cake. Birthdays and holidays were the only times the Rogers’ family got to indulge in sweet treats. Steve had made it clear that his children were to only eat the healthiest of foods, and his doting wife always complied.

A knock on the door caught Sasha’s attention. While the family was in momentary disarray, Sasha was the only one who ended up hearing the faint series of knocks.

Therefore, she wiped her hands of sweet buttercream icing and made her way to the locked door. The knocks continued on even after she told them to wait a minute. A peek through the peephole revealed a stranger. To be fair, everyone was a stranger to the Rogers’ family. No frequent visitors, friends, even family, the Rogers’ only knew each other.

“Daddy, someones at our door,” Steve abandoned the youngest child to meet Sasha at the door.

Steve glanced through the peephole and for a minute it seemed like he saw a ghost. “It can’t be,” Steve swung open the door so fast that Sasha feared she would get knocked out by it.

“Bucky,” Steve looked at the stranger on the other side of the door.  

“Been a while huh?” The man, Bucky, gives a half grin at Sasha’s father.

“Wow,” Bucky turns to Sasha, “she’s all grown up,” Bucky invites himself in, but before he could get halfway past the threshold Steve stops him.

“Why all of a sudden have you turned up?” Steve gives Bucky a look that says “don’t say too much.”

“Because there’s a party going on,” Bucky then turns to Sasha. “Happy birthday sweetheart. My god, look at you,” Bucky looks her up and down. Sasha looked very taken back by the strange man. Who was he and why did he know your father?

Steve cleared his throat, “uhm, Y/N is in the kitchen cutting the cake. Why don’t you stay for some,” Bucky obliged and made his way into the kitchen.

“Dad, who is he?” Steve was quick to dismiss her question by replying that he’d been an old friend that knew him back when Sasha was first born.

Buck had made his way into the small kitchen, nothing had changed since Steve had brought his now wife here. In that kitchen were a bunch of children, some big and some small, all asking for a slice of Sasha’s birthday cake.

And then there was her, the young women that Bucky once knew, now all grown up with a family of her own. Bucky couldn’t help but smile at how pleasant she looked while serving the youngest children slices of their cake. She turned once she felt a presence at the door. A mix of emotions flashed through her eyes for a moment, but then her confused expression turned into a smile. She gladly walked over to the long time friend and greeted him with a huge smile and open arms.

“Bucky, it’s great to see you,” not a hint of sarcasm or an urgent surge of rage coursed this beautiful woman. She was genuinely happy to see the man that ruined her life prematurely.

“You haven’t aged a day since I last saw you,” Bucky smiled as he hugged her back. She looked nice in her freshly ironed dress and brand new heels her husband had demanded she wear around the house at all times.

“Please, come sit down while we have some cake. Kids, get to the dining room now please,” the herd of small children rushed out into the dining room with their sweet treats in hand.

__

Bucky was observant throughout dessert. Upon dodging judgemental and questioning looks from Steve, Bucky got to know more about the rest of the Rogers family.

“Last time I was here you had just had Gwynedd, yes?” Their mother nodded as a carbon copy of Steve Rogers looked up at him with a smile. She was going to be 17 soon, as she mentioned to the family a handful of times about birthday party ideas.

Then there was the third oldest, Max, a short haired, freckly 15 year old who had dreams of becoming an engineer. Reid was approaching 13 years old in the next couple of months, he was adamant on a firetruck themed party seeing as he wanted to be a fireman when he grew up. 11 year old Jocelyn had the same physique as her mother, but her personality was all Steve, she was sassy and always helping out her younger sibling. Last, and probably won’t be the least, was 9 year old Sarah Rogers, named accordingly after Steve’s long departed mother of course, she was the prized baby of the family that no one could touch.

Then there was Sasha, the oldest Rogers. Sasha was 100% her mother, from looks to personality. It was almost like someone hit a copy and paste button on everything Y/N Rogers and stamped it perfectly onto Sasha. Bucky couldn’t believe that the once small baby girl he held in his hands had grown into a beautiful, young woman. Bucky was snapped out of his thoughts when Steve called his name.  

“So, um, Bucky, what plans do you have for the summer?”

“Daddy says we might be able to go to the seashore this summer if we all behave,” Sarah shouted with her mouthful of cake. Her mother scolded her for interrupting Bucky and Steve.

“Well that sounds a lot more exciting than what I’m doing, Sarah. I’ll be fixing up this old house I bought a few blocks over from you guys. I got it for cheap so I want to do some remodeling and maybe sell the place before autumn.”

“Why would you buy a house just to sell it again in a few months?” It was Gwenyd’s turn to interrupt this time.

“It’s called house flipping Gwen, people buy crappy houses and pour all their money into it so they can get stinkn’ rich off the place,” Sasha finally spoke up.

“Sash, remember we don’t use words like that in front of the younger ones,” her mother reminded her before putting her head down and eating the rest of her cake slice.

“You’re very correct Sasha. Think of this as a new hobby of mine, Steve, taking something old and run down and forming it into something new and modern.”

“So what are you going to do to it?” Gwenyd asked.

“Well I'm going to redo the whole structure of the outside, maybe add in a pool and deck area in the backyard. The inside I’m planning on gutting the whole thing and putting in my own personal touches,” the children all ooh’d and ahh’d at the idea.

The wheels in Bucky’s head were turning for a moment. He looked at sweet Sasha and the other kids. He couldn’t just leave them caged up in this house for the summer. He knows Steve. He knows that he’ll keep them locked up inside for fear of one of the children saying something about their unusual situation. He didn’t want to leave Sasha most of all. 18 years old and definitely hasn’t gotten a chance to explore the world. He wanted to help them.

“Say, kids, redoing a big house is a lot of work for one man. How about you guys help me out and I’ll give you some money for your seashore trip,” Reid jumped out of his chair all excited.

“Daddy, Mommy, please please please let us help Bucky. Please!” Steve quieted Reid down.

Their mother kept her head down. She would love for them to get out of the house for a bit, but Steve makes all the rules.

“I’ll have to think about it, Bucky,” Steve said which caused the younger siblings to groan.

“I think it’ll be fun, dad. We get a little bit of work experience, we’ll be kept busy for a couple weeks, and we can make our own money,” Sasha spoke up and Gwenyd was giving her dad a thumbs up to agree with her older sister.

“I said I’ll think about it, girls,” Steve said sternly while finishing off his cake.

Steve couldn’t help but glare at Bucky throughout the rest of dessert. Something just wasn’t right about Bucky’s abrupt visit. Steve’s wife didn’t seem to care much because she enjoyed getting visitors, but Bucky wasn’t a frequent visitor in their home.

Bucky left Steve soon after Gweyndd was born. He stayed around because Steve needed someone to help take care of Sasha while he was busy breaking in his wife. Steve never told Bucky to leave him after that, he would’ve preferred if Bucky stayed around to be in their lives. However, one morning he took off and never came back, he even went as far as breaking all contact with Steve.

Dessert was over and the kids were helping their mother clean up. Steve offered to help, but the kids hopped right to it, cleaning down the table and loading the dishes into the sink. While they were busy, Steve led Bucky into their family room with a couple beers in his hands.

“So, why are you really here?” Bucky laughed.

“Stevie, I just said I was stopping by. Sasha’s 18th birthday is a pretty big deal. No longer a young girl, but a grown woman,” Steve seethed at his response.

“So after all these years of no contact you just decided to show up again after like everything is okay?” Bucky looked at their surroundings to see if anyone was listening. When the coast was cleared he finally spoke up.

“I had the cops on my ass since that first week. That stupid family next door had cameras showing me getting Y/N to come outside with me. Lucky I convinced Sam to pull those traffic cameras and delete the evidence or we both would’ve been caught.”

“The cops were snooping around and you didn’t think to tell me?” Steve heart rate picked up. He did get questioned by the cops one day, but already rehearsed a solid alibi. Who would've guessed that taking that one drama class in high school gave him solid acting skills.

“I had to lay low. I’m pretty sure they tapped my phone and had P.I.’s following me everywhere I went. Once I was cleared of anything I got a new job and skipped town.”

The case went cold after a few years, Steve guessed that they were trying to pin the disappearance on Bucky, but considering Bucky is standing in front of him today it seems he got off.

“So what do they think happened?” Steve whispered.

“A classic runaway case. The family refuses to accept that she’s gone for good. I got to town every now and then and I hear that the parents go looking for her every night on their own. Everyone gave up on them,” Steve let out a breath of relief. He feared that the cops were still after his wife after all this time. It’s refreshing to find out that the case is really over.

“So, you really taking the kids to the beach?” Bucky smirked already knowing Steve’s response.

“They’ve been hounding me all year that they wanted to get out of the house and do something fun. Had to tell them something to get them off my back.”

“When are you gonna break the news to them?”

“Probably a week before I told them we would go. I’m sure Reid or Joce will do something that’ll make me “change my mind”,” Steve smirked. He really couldn’t risk them going out of the house.

“Why don’t they come with me,” Steve laughed.

“I’m serious, Steve. All that time in the house with the kids, how do you and the missus have any “free time”,” Steve rolled his eyes.

“What we do is none of your business. Plus, I don’t want any of these kids to run their mouths like Sasha did,” Bucky asked what he meant by that. Sweet Sasha would sell out her family like that?

Steve explained the whole situation. She took playing house a little too far and took the kids outside to play. Just as bad luck would have it, the neighbors were also outside when they noticed a bunch of unattended children running around and playing. The nosy bastards kept asking Sasha questions. Did you kids just move in? Where are your parents? You’ve been living here how long?

Fucking CPS got involved and wouldn’t let up on the family. Steve’s wife sure as hell got a punishment of a lifetime. She also had to stay in the basement anytime a social worker would have random visits. Couldn’t risk anything.

To get them off their backs, Steve promised that he would enroll all the children in real schools so they would get more social interaction from their age groups. Yeah, that lasted about a month or two until the social workers stopped coming by. Everyone of them got pulled out of school except for Sasha. She enjoyed learning so much and was already making her way into high school.

It took months of convincing her mother to help her out to convince Steve to let her go to high school. Long nights and heated arguments between the couple was giving Steve major migraines. He finally agreed, but only on a string of strict conditions. Luckily, Sasha was already well behaved at this point so he wasn’t too worried about her fucking up again.

“I think it’ll be a good idea to let the kids come with me. They can learn new things and it’ll get them out of your hair. Think of all the time you and Y/N will have. So much time that you could be giving the kids and new brother or sister,” Steve did perk up at that idea. He has been on his wife for a while now about wanting a new baby, they just aren’t getting many opportunities to try with all the kids around.

Steve thought for a moment, “You’ll make sure they won’t get into any trouble right?”

“I’ll watch them like hawks,” Bucky promised as he saw Sasha coming out of the kitchen to head upstairs.

“Hey daddy, I’m gonna go to bed, but I just wanted to say goodnight. Thank you for a great birthday,” Sasha kissed her father’s cheek.

“It was nice meeting you Bucky,” Bucky smiled at her as she walked upstairs.

“You raised her well, Stevie.”

“Fine,” Bucky was surprised.

“Fine what?”

“You can have the kids help you, but don’t get into anything stupid or I’ll have your head,” Steve threatened as the other children started to come in to say goodnight.

“I’ll be here 8 sharp then,” Bucky got up to leave soon after the kids were getting ready for bed.

Bucky had his own planning to do, and he would make sure he would keep Steve’s word.

__

For something that the children were so excited about, they were relieved that helping Bucky out was over.

What they thought was a couple week project turned into the whole summer. A few fights and temper tantrums later and the house was almost done. However, Bucky wouldn’t need their help any longer. Instead, he agreed that he would keep them longer so Steve had a good excuse to say why their trip wasn’t happening this summer. The kids were so upset that their beach trip got canceled, but Bucky made it up to them by buying them ice cream and letting them watch movies all day one day.

Not only did they get endless amounts of ice cream, but they had a new addition to expect in the next 9 months. Yes, their mother got pregnant again with another child. Bucky could tell Sasha was a little upset by this, but the others were thoroughly excited about a new brother or sister joining the family.

The nights got cooler and the days were getting shorter meaning fall was approaching them. Which meant Sasha would finally be able to get back to school. While most kids dreaded going back Sasha didn’t. She loved school, her teachers, classes, and most of all was getting new books. There has never been a kid who enjoyed reading a European World History book more than Sasha Rogers. Also she couldn’t wait to get some peace and quiet away from her brothers and sisters.

“Sash,” Bucky stopped her before she could walk out of his new house.

“Yeah, Buck,” they had grown rather close during this time, almost as if they were long lost friends.

“I got you something. Think of it as a late birthday present,” Bucky pulled out of his back pocket a rectangular device. Sasha had seen them on TV all the time. In fact, she begged for one for so many years, but her father yelled at her to drop it before he got even more angry.

“I’m not supposed to have one of these. Dad will kill me, he’ll kill you,” Bucky laughed and shoved the phone and its box in her hands.

“It’ll be our secret. Hide this in and don’t tell anyone. Don’t tell mom or Gwen, even your friends at school,” Bucky urged her to take it.

“But I can’t pay for it,” Sasha wasn’t allowed to have a job either.

“I’ll take care of everything. Just to make sure we are clear, don’t do anything stupid with this phone. You tell no one about it at all. If I find anything bad on this phone I won’t hesitate to tell your father, understand?” Sasha gulped and shook her head out of fear of what her father would do.

“Uhm, uh, thank you so much Bucky,” Sasha hugged him.

“It’s no problem at all, Sash.”

Now with a phone in her hand and access to contacting her, Bucky had his own plan in motion.

Tags to be added in comments!!

[lonely-bored-writer]

Not So Alone

Fandom: Danny Phantom & Ben 10 (2005)

Summary: The life of a hero is often a lonely one, filled with anguish and danger, as much as it is filled pride and gratification. The weight of that life is crushing for any soul, let alone one much too young for such powers. One can only be lucky to find someone that can relate on a tiniest of gains, but luck seemed to be on these two boys. One finds a friend, the other finds a family.

Warnings: Although these are kids shows about kids, it does touch on the harsher reality of things than the shows do. It's gonna be overall angsty and heavy. This is the only overall warning I'm giving, and also some characters are de-aged to fit the story/theme. Enjoy!

The life of a hero was often a lonely and tiring path, one with high expectations. If a hero made one mistake, it could be a grave one. Lives are on the line, a hero doesn't have time to make mistakes. However, one cannot live a perfect life. Guilt was a heavy weight, especially on the minds of the young.

Benjamin Tennyson is only ten years old when this weight was pressed into his life. The Omnitrix was a complex device, one that allowed the young hero to take forms of various alien life-forms. As exciting as the idea of possessing such power was, Ben found that with powers comes villains. The detection of such powerful alien-technology brought forth a sea of those wanting it for themselves, and aliens appearing all across Earth. Seemingly always wherever the young Tennyson wanted to relax and be a child.

That was where the young hero found himself, stumbling upon yet another disaster needing his help.

Ben found himself smiling as the sound of the helicopter whirled in the air. Today was going to be good, just him with Grandpa Max and Gwen visiting a Rich guy's new hotel. The man was a millionaire, he had to have his own security detail, which means the Omnitrix shouldn't be needed and his time will finally be free. To have fun, to be a kid, and maybe to cause a little trouble of course. But what could you expect from a ten-year old.

He chose to tune out Grandpa's reunion with Donovan, instead choosing to take in the sights of the helipad on the roof. It was amazing, no fights against aliens could stand up against experiencing things like this. It was stuff Ben could only dream of having, let alone seeing. He turned his gaze to the boy standing next to the other man, pulling a smile that dropped quickly when the other boy frowned and turned his head. Ben was used to not being liked, but that's usually after his already spoke. School didn't count.

"Hi." Ben smiled when Mr. Grand Smith introduced them to Edwin.

"Yea, whatever." The child responded, crossing his arms in a way of disinterest. Ben frowned, turning to meet his cousin's own surprised look. People normally liked Gwen, he couldn't imagine how weird it was for someone to dislike her before she started on her smart talk. Ben held in a sigh, turning back to the adults. Neither of them commented on Edwin's rude behavior. But Ben knew if that was him, Grandpa would have most definitely said something.

"Ready to take the plunge?" Donovan smiled, motioning towards a set of doors that opened. He followed the others in, glancing to see Edwin giving both Tennyson kids a side-glare.

The group silently made it onto the raft, Ben glanced over and watched Edwin stare off into the distance. Neither Gwen or Grandpa Max caught his gaze. He was excite sure, this was going to be fun. But it's hard to have fun when you're so used to it all taking a deep dive at sooner or later. No pun intended. Nonetheless his smile was clear as day as the raft made its way down the tube. Gwen turned, grinning at him before turning to their Grandpa. It was nice, he was too used to their bickering, he forgot sometimes they can get along.

Ben watched in awe as the water glistened around the mostly clear tube, sea-life swimming past them. Ben wasn't sure if his new fondness of the sea was because of Ripjaws, but the sea always seemed peaceful to him. Even when sometimes a sea creature comes out and tries to eat you.

"You sure this is the safest place to build a resort like this?" Grandpa Max asked, grabbing Ben's attention. If Grandpa was feeling uneasy, that usually means something's going to happen. For once, Ben wished it wouldn't. More so than any other time. Ben didn't catch Mr. Grand Smith's response, but he did grab the next thing that came out the oldest Tennyson's lips. "I mean you're smack dab in the middle of the Bermuda Triangle." That caught Gwen's attention as well.

"Growing up you were always the worry wart, Max." Donovan laughed, looking out at the vast sea. "Never the risk taker. I give you the world's first, and only, underwater resort." The man flourished with a gesture of his arm. Ben sat up straight, looking forward in awe. It was beautiful.

Ben didn't quite catch what the man said as they got closer to the docking. Mr. Grand Smith was talking about some things about the hotel with Grandpa, but Ben was much to excited to explore. He grinned up at Gwen who matched his grin. The moment the raft settled, he and Gwen were already headed off.

The two stopped in front of one of the many glass windows, staring in awe at all the beautiful and colorful fishes that swam by. Ben heard the others approaching behind them.

"I read about your resort in-" Ben tuned out the rest of Gwen's talking. Focusing on all the fishes, before his eyes landed on the scuba diver. He knew that was the gear from older models at least, but it really did make the experience come just a bit more alive. "Isn't the glass reinforced-" Ben caught when his cousin cut herself off. He felt a spark of anger in him when he heard Edwin cough into his hand.

"Butt-kisser."

Donovan continued the conversation as if nothing happened. However, Ben hated it. This was one of the few places he didn't want to be kicked out of, or grounded in. His mind glossed over the science talk that happened. He did catch that the place had nine whole pools, and that it costed two billion dollars. Even Ben had to be impressed.

"But you know, money isn't everything." Donovan smiled, only to quickly drop to a frown when his grandson chimed in.

"Changed the family motto, Grandpa?" Edwin scoffed, hands still crossed. Ben glanced at the other kid, eyes furrowing. It wasn't had to tell the kid didn't want to be there, and it's not like Ben knew what it was like being rich, but he sure did think this place was cool enough to want to be in. Ben's eyes zeroed in on a little yellow pin resting against the burgundy sweater.

"Hey, I'm into Sumo Slammers too." Ben tried, moving a little closer. "Where'd you score that pin?" He asked, gesturing towards the pin. He tried not to let it get to him when the other boy still looked away from him.

"Sumo slammers slam-down V in Helsinki." Edwin responded, still not meeting Ben's eyes. "We flew on my Grandpa's private jet just to get it." That must have been fun, Ben remembered when he first heard about it and how much he wanted to go, but knew he couldn't.

"And Edwin says the pin's already tripled in value." Donovan chimed in, resting a hand on his grandson's shoulder. The older gentleman then turned to Grandpa Max. "Kid's got a head for business, grooming him to take over the empire one day. Gotta keep it in the family." Ben grinned, turning to look at his Grandpa.

"I've sort of been following in my grandpa's footsteps this summer, too." Ben smiled, he's learned not to give too much out too soon after the incident with Grandpa's old partner. But this was something he was proud of, being good at something for once. It was at that moment the lights began to flicker, and an alarm sound rang through the air. Ben tensed, glancing around and tried to find any immediate dangers.

Everyone turned in time to see the Scuba diver, that caught Ben's eyes, lose his balance as the water around him surged towards the fans below. His eyes watched as the man fell, only stopping when his tether got caught up in railings. His eyes caught sight of the water pooling into the mask, as the man struggled to get back up. He barely caught the words Donovan spoke in response to what happened. A power surge.

"Will he be okay?" Ben asked, turning to look at the eldest in the room.

"Hmph, if the sharks don't get him first." Ben glanced over, feeling an uneasiness at how emotionless Edwin said that.

"I can't have an employee turned into fish food right before the opening. The press will ruin me." Mr. Grand Smith spoke, turning and rushing to go do something. Ben grounded his teeth, they spoke like a man's life wasn't in danger. He could easily save him if he turned into Ripjaws, but that wasn't the point of the trip. The Grand Smiths had to have it covered.

A glance from Gwen, however, told him otherwise. He rushed off to an area he was sure he could transform in without being seen. Ripjaws it was. Ben pressed against a pipe, turning the Omnitrix until Ripjaws silhouette popped up. With a sigh, he pressed it. Feeling the familiar tug and slight ache as his biology transformed, but this didn't feel like Ripjaws.

"Seriously, for once I was better off as me." Ben groaned staring down at the grey skinned hands of Grey Matter. He blinked, feeling the familiar reptilian lids slid over his eyes. Nonetheless Ben quickly leaped into the water. A man's life was on the line, even if he wasn't well suited to help, he couldn't wait.

He pushed through the water as fast as he could, watch the sharks circle around the dangling man. Two. The man was struggling, which never helped in a situation like this, but Ben understood the fear. He was feeling the same fear as he tried to run through a plan to help save the man. Instinctively he grabbed on to one of the shark's fin, hitching a ride as it took another round.

Ben reeled back his arm and took a straight punch to the shark's eye, throwing it off course. He continued to punch, even as the shark made a beeline for the man, mouth open and ready to bite. His heart hammered away at his chest, before his eyes landed on the second shark. To his luck, or maybe Grey Matter's calculations, the shark he rode on bit into the second one.

His grip slipped on where he gripped the gills, and he was projected away from the fighting sharks. Only to land smack dab in the middle of the helmet's window. Ignoring the ache in his lungs from how long his been holding his breath in such a small form, he smiled at the man staring eye-wide at the alien. To his luck, he heard the fan start to slow down before reversing.

The water propelled the two upwards, knocking the man's helmet off his head. The bubbles that came out the moment the helmet came of scared Ben for a second, before he found himself being launched into air, rather than water.

Ben winced as his hand hit full-force on the edge of a replica boat hanging off the ceiling. The copper dung harshly into his palm, but he made sure to tighten his grip when the ever familiar beeping sounded. Quickly followed by a flash of light, and Ben having to readjust to being normal again. Almost losing his grip, but securing it in time to hear Edwin speak.

"Hey, where's your cousin?"

"Just hanging!" Ben called from his place, waving his other hand. Ignoring the pain in his arm, he laughed. "Does anyone have a ladder?"

It didn't take long for Ben to find himself back on solid ground. He watched as the Scuba diver stumbled away from them. He felt bad for the man. Especially when Donovan spoke about doubling his salary, but at least the press wouldn't know. The man's life had to be more important than money or reputation, right?

"But who would believe him, he said some six-inch rat with two legs saved him." Donovan laughed, shaking his head.

"Just buy him off." Edwin spoke, arms still crossed, and looking at no one in particularly. To Ben it seemed like a kid whose pouting about not getting his way, but what kid can pout through all this. "Now, that's the Grand Smith way."

"Ahem. Edwin, why don't you take Ben and Gwen on a tour so their grandpa and I can catch up on old times?" Donovan cleared his throat before smiling. Ben still can't believe everyone was just letting the kid act like this. Then again, money changes everything. That's what every ones' told him and that's what he's come to learn.

"Oh man." Ben quietly groaned, the same time Gwen did too. "Ugh."

Ben watched as the two walked away, not really listening to the words but processing it for later. Ben quietly followed Edwin in the opposite direction, not bothering to attempt small talk, and neither was Gwen.

It didn't take long before the trio found themselves walking up to a mock-beach with a large water-slide that Ben most definitely had to try at least twice. If going Grey Matter was the only incident for the rest of the stay, this could be one fun time. "Nice." Ben broke the silence, looking in awe at the twisty slides.

"Not bad." Edwin spoke as well, his 'better than you tone' ever so present. "In the morning, I have my own swim coach and person trainer to work out with." Which if Ben was being honest he wouldn't have expected, but then again, no one would suspect him of spending a good part of his summer fighting aliens and criminals.

"You're a swimmer?" Gwen asked, not bothering to hide her surprise.

"Long-distance." Edwin responded, creating the movements as if he were swimming. "My grandpa say it builds character."

Ben couldn't help but mock him the moment he walked away. Gwen laughed at him, before following the rich kid. Ben shook his head before following along, he made a mental note to make sure to come back and visit this mock-beach.

The next stop also had Ben stricken with awe. A submarine hung from the ceiling, an open pool underneath. One would assume it was functional, and Edwin filled in any thoughts with some facts.

"It's called the Undersea Manta Ray." Edwin spoke, moving closer to it as the other two followed. "It's my grandfather's."

"Well, it looks cool." Gwen spoke, just as in awe as Ben.

"You want to take it for a ride?" Edwin asked, having not turned around.

"Definitely." Ben spoke first, not taking his eyes off the submarine.

"You sure it's okay?" Gwen asked, turning a suspicious look to Edwin. Ben bit back a sigh, they were kids, they were meant to cause trouble sometimes. Edwin never really responded though, instead smirking at the two Tennysons.

Edwin instead instructed them to follow and he lowered the submarine. Ben grinned at Gwen who only looked worried. "We shouldn't do this." Gwen whispered as Edwin worked the submarine open.

"Come on Gwen, when would we get this opportunity again?" Ben grinned, following Edwin in. He didn't have to worry if Gwen was going to follow or not, she always did.

The kid knew what he was doing in terms of driving the submarine, that was for sure. But Ben couldn't tear his eyes away from the different forms of sea-life swimming by. The color fishes, the glowing pink jellyfish.

"Wow, some of these fish look totally prehistoric." Gwen's worry seemed to vanish as the nerd side of her came out. Ben had to agree though, some of these looked like those fishes Ben caught sight of when Gwen was watching her documentaries. Ben smiled, when Gwen looked back at him with her own grin. This was nice, like really nice. Everything was so pretty and peaceful down here.

The submarine descended a few more levels before gliding forward through the dark depths with ease. The lights illuminating the once pitch-black waters. Ben wasn't paying much attention to anything but the sea-life until Gwen spoke up.

"Okay, now that's weird." Just then a glowing blue, squid-like robot jolted in front of the window. Quickly the robot latched itself to the window, and rammed an almost beak-like part into it. Ben tensed, turning to see Edwin looking shocked and scared.

"And that's weirder." He said. One more popped up at Edwin's window, following the same actions as the first one. Ben tensed, glancing around as more swarmed the submarine. The bots made screeching noises as the rammed up against the windows. Fear flooded into Ben's system, along with adrenaline. He wanted to relax, not deal with another adrenaline high.

The familiar sound of glass cracking sounded through the noise, before the sound of rushing water filled through and an alarm blared. Ben could tell he needed to step in, but how could he when there was nowhere to run or hide.

"What do you think those creatures what?!" Edwin asked, glancing back at Gwen.

"I don't think it's to play Marco polo." Came her usual nervous response. Ben's face settled in determination.

"We've gotta go back to the hotel." Edwin's face seemed to settle at his words, the kid pulling a lever and moving the submarine faster and upwards. Ben sighed a quiet sigh of relief as he saw some of the creatures lose their grip and float away. He knew they were chasing them, others still clinging to the ship.

He had to put as much faith as he could into Edwin, if he tried to help, he'd out himself. He flinched when the first explosion sounded, one of those creatures' made contact with an apparently live bomb. The train reaction followed quickly, the other ones near by going off as well.

The submarine jolted around, and Ben's hope slowly started to fizzle out. No other creatures seemed to take a dive with those explosions. Ben's eyes flipped around at the creatures and debris flying through the sea.

"Grandpa, do you copy?" Edwin spoke into a radio, which Ben silently wish he'd done earlier. No response. Ben turned, catching his cousin's eyes. He didn't want to but he knew that look. Nodding, he unbuckled his belt and made his way to the exit. Being sure to close the door behind him. The ship didn't need to take on any more water.

"Turn me into Wild Mutt, you're dead meat." Ben grumbled, hoping that he got Ripjaws. They couldn't afford another mishap like earlier. Not this time. He felt the familiar tug and aches, before the light died down. "Okay, now we're talking." He breathed, eyes trailing over the familiar greenish scales.

Taking down the bots was much easier as Ripjaws, the sharp claws and strong teeth ripped through them without a problem. Swimming through the water was much easier as well, his legs slinging together into a tail. The worry came with trying to get all the creatures away from the submarine before they destroyed it and put Gwen and Edwin's lives more endanger.

Once he finally caught up with the submarine, he chomped the closest one in half. That seemed to do it. Most of the creatures paused, before turning their attention to him. The tentacles were annoying, that's for sure. Even through the adrenaline, Ben could feel the faint aches of where the bruises would form. Ripjaws was the best one for the job, even if his skin wasn't as tough as some of the others.

Ben barely manage to take out six that swarmed him at once, before high-tailing it towards the submarine. He glanced inside to see Gwen's relieved face, and Edwin's worried one. Not stopping to eavesdrop, he quickly moved on from creature to creature. He took out the last one when the familiar beeping chimed near his gills, followed by the soft flash of red.

His fear spiked when he reached the hatch, pulling desperately on it, but there was no give. In his haste to destroy the creatures, he didn't notice the damage the submarine took. He does now remember the harsh blow on his back from the impact. He barely pulled open the latch, and swung himself inside when the flash came over him. He pushed open the door, water falling to the ground, and dripping from him but he didn't pay attention.

Inhaling deeply, he feel to his knees, resting against the metal flooring. His lung ached in the time it took him to fully adjust and get in, and exhaustion settled in his bones as the adrenaline slowly seeped out of them. They weren't in the clear yet, but his body could only panic for so long.

Ben felt his heart drop in relief once they passed through those doors. Silently the trio made their way out of the submarine and onto the deck. Alarms blared loudly around them, signifying that the base was also under attack.

"We're flooding." Donovan spoke, glancing among them all. "They broke the glass."

"I knew you shouldn't have taken it. I knew it." Edwin cut in urgently.

"Edwin quiet. I'm sure it has nothing to do with this." Donovan hushed him, but Ben couldn't help but focus his gaze on Edwin.

"Taken what Donovan." Grandpa Max cut in, Ben could hear the anger already settling his grandpa's voice.

"Edwin doesn't know what he's talking about." Donovan excused. Ben tensed with ever second that passed. This back and forth, along with the alarms and the threat right outside the door. He couldn't calm down.

"How would you know? All you ever hear from me is what you want to hear." Edwin all but yelled as his grandfather. The sound of zapping electricity brought the others attention back to the matter at hand. A few of those creatures appeared above the submarine.

"Let's go." Max commanded, everyone immediately following his order. They rushed quickly into the elevator, barely making it through before the creatures would have been on top of them.

"Donovan, what is going on?" Grandpa Max asked, once they settled in the elevator.

"Okay, the underwater volcano thing didn't work. The resort was doomed." Ben had no clue what he was on about, but he had a feeling alien technology was involved. "I was about to become a punch line to a bad joke. Then I found this other energy source on this weird craft way down below. It was like nothing I've ever seen before. "

"And now, I bet those aliens want it back." Gwen chimed in. Ben's face hardened, this man put every ones' lives at risk over a stupid resort.

"Yea, the same ones with the underwater parking lot full of boats and planes." Ben said. Everyone glanced among each other.

The moment those elevator doors opened, the group made their way out only to be met with a rush of water and creatures headed their way. They made it through another doorway, Ben barely picked up a comment Grandpa Max made about his job and the Bermuda triangle. He glanced his watch and clenched his teeth. Still red.

They did manage to make it onto a raft, water spilling from holes everywhere. Everyone sat in silence for a moment, waiting for their turn up the tube to leave. Ben glanced and caught sight of Donovan's angry and defeated face.

"look on the bright side grandpa, you still have fifteen resorts worldwide." Edwin tried to comfort Donovan. Ben watched as the older man didn't say anything, simply moving the raft to exit. Ben heard it first, a soft noise before the tentacles arrived, wrapping over the edge of the raft. Nothing could ever go that simply.

The raft was torn apart effortlessly, Ben cried out as he watched Grandpa Max and Mr. Grand Smith be pulled in the opposite direction as the kids. Ben screamed along with the other kids as their half started free-falling back into the resort. His mind racing with the reality that the resort down there was falling apart and should collapse and be fully submerged soon.

Ben caught sight of Gwen coaching Edwin, having him cover his eyes. He caught her eyes next before nodding. Lucky for him, the watch had enough time to reboot. He didn't need to swim, he needed to get them out of there as soon as possible. Stinkfly it was. Ben focused on holding tightly to Edwin and Gwen as Gwen gave a lame excuse to the other boy.

"Hold on." Ben spoke, glancing at Edwin before focusing his attention on the road before them. His heart rate picked up with every lucky dodge of a tentacle he made. He could see the sharpness and ridge of them. He knew if he let even one of them touch any of them, it could be some serious damage. In his attention to the spikes, he didn't notice the stream of water before it was too late.

They hit the water hard, Ben berating himself mentally as him came up. "My wings are too wet, I can't fly. And, oh, yea I can't swim either." He spoke, finding himself falling back under the current. To his luck, Gwen and Edwin caught him quickly and supported him up on the surface.

"Don't worry, we got you. Ben." Edwin spoke, giving the bug a knowing look.

"That's not Ben." Gwen tried to defend, but Ben already know. Edwin knew it was him, but he didn't seem like he was planning to tell anyone.

"Yea right, good aliens just showing up to help us." Edwin responded. "While your cousin always happens to be gone? How dumb do I look? So how do you do it?" He turned to Ben.

"Edwin Listen to me." Gwen pulled the boy's attention to her. "That energy orb-if the aliens are here for it, we have to get to it first."

"Alright, let's get it." Edwin spoke after a short pause, and Ben was just relieved to have the attention off him. "But it's all the way on the other side of the resort."

"But we can't make it in the water." Ben pointed out.

"Who said anything about swimming." Gwen smirked, Ben followed her gaze to the air ducts.

They were making good progress in the vents, Gwen being the only one really speaking. Ben was too worried about if his grandpa made it up alright, and if he could get the others out safely. The Gwen made some comment about getting there quicker, and the pipes decided to give right there and then. As they free fell through the pipes, Ben cursed how unlucky they were until they landed.

By speed boats.

"Alright, now we're talking." Ben laughed, watching Gwen take a seat before going to follow suit. Just as he was about to pull himself up he felt a iron-tight grip surround his leg and a yank down-ward.

He fought harshly against the tentacle, holding in his breath. To his luck, the watch beeped before turning him back. Making him smaller, giving him the chance to slide out of the grasp and swim upwards. He felt the strong ache in his lungs. He gasped for air the moment he broke the surface, turning a gaze at the creature popping up. Pulling himself up onto the boat, Gwen immediately put it to drive. Edwin followed behind, oar in hand and took out the creature.

"Thanks." Ben offered with a thumbs up.

"Thank you. That was awesome." Edwin responded, and Ben couldn't help but note that the kid was smiling for the first time since they got there. "Hey lookout!" Gwen narrowly missed a collision with one of those creatures.

The rest of the ride consisted on trying to doge every one of those things, and keeping close enough to each other so they didn't lose anyone. Before long they made it to the orb, without anymore incidents.

"If the orb can power this whole resort, just imagine what the aliens did with it." Gwen awed, staring at the small pink orb.

"Stealing all those ships and planes would be a good guess." Ben retorted, remembering that those were the creatures responsible for the Bermuda Triangle.

"Maybe if we reverse the connections, it would turn its outward power inward." Edwin offered, Gwen peaking up at the science driven solution.

"And make the whole resort implode." Ben tensed, glancing down at his watch. Red. It was a smart plan though.

"With those aliens in it." He finished.

"Good thinking Edwin." Gwen praised, and Ben offered him a smile.

"Thanks, but we still need to get out of here." Edwin pointed out. Ben paused, before smirking.

"I have an idea." As long as the watch rebooted in time.

Edwin quickly reverted the power surge, the creatures started to flock to it the moment they were heading out. Ben smiled softly as the key component to his plan came into view.

"That's your escape plan?" Edwin asked surprised. Ben nodded, looking at the replica submarine. "It's only for show!" Edwin pointed out.

"And when I'm done with it, it'll be for go." Ben responded, eyes landing on his watch. Green. Hoping it gave him what he needed this time. "Upgrade." He whispered as the glow and feeling washed over him. He made quick work of wrapping himself all along the submarine and merging into it.

He propelled them forward, pushing with all his might as he felt the water around them tremble. The explosion was going to catch up to them, but he needed to get them to an opening. Lucky for them, all the creatures were distracted down below, they made it out without much more of a hitch. The explosion helping Ben propel them forward, towards the surface.

Once they were close enough to the surface that momentum alone would get them to the top, Ben merged himself back into the main space. The beeping sounding and turning him back just as he got inside. Ben couldn't focus too much once they got on dry land. The exhaustion of the day hitting him, but nonetheless he smiled.

Ben smiled and laughed along with everyone before they were biding their good-bye's and making their way back to the RV. Ben yawned, quietly listening to Gwen recount the story to Grandpa all the way to the rust-bucket.

"You kids did good." Grandpa Max smiled, before turning his attention to Ben. "Are you okay Ben?" He asked, concern folding into his features. Ben smiled with a nod and a laugh.

"I'm just beat." He grinned, ignoring the dull aches and throbs that ran through his muscles. All he wanted now, was a nap.

[retvenkos]

Okay so I’m personally offended with myself for not having found you earlier? Like, YOURE AMAZING! Your writing is super awesome and I’m glad I finally did find you. Anyways, I was hoping I could request a 🔥 ship/HCs? For BBC Merlin, PJO/HOO, and ATLA (or LOK, whichever you’d prefer or is easier for you). I am bisexual so I’m down to be shipped with whatever gender (although I am kinda leaning towards men rn). I’m a Ravenclaw and my Myers-Brigg personality type is INFP-T. I’m kind of a nerd and I love learning new things. I tried to learn Latin at one point but it was while I was in school and I didn’t finish before the school year was up. I love reading, writing, singing, listening to music, watching movies and watching musicals. I also really love physical affection (both giving and receiving). I love any and all animals SO MUCH. I can be kinda silly sometimes but I know when to get serious. I love having fun with my friends but I also just love the days that I can just sit with them and relax. I’m pretty protective of the people I’m close to. I’m also kind of stubborn. I have a small obsession with dragons and kind of just mythical beings in general. I feel happy when I make others happy. I like helping people when I can. My main love languages are physical touch and words of affirmation. If I were a bender in the ATLA/LOK universe, I would be an earth bender. I’m also a sucker for soulmate AUs, which you might have noticed when I was reblogging your stuff earlier. I think that’s all?? If you need anything else, just let me know! And thank you so much!!

PS: CONGRATS ON 2.5k

thank you for your kind words about my blog! i’m glad you like it here, lol. and, as always, disclaimer that it’s been a while since i’ve read pjo and so the headcanons might not be the best. bear with me.

Merlin:

I ship you with Gwen!

alright, i was debating between gwen and sir leon, but i 100% believe gwen is the perfect match-up for you - both of you are sweet and kind yet clever with the potential to be teasing, annoying idiots.

the two of you would get along famously, and you would be the sweetest, most supportive couple - literally everyone wants what you have, and i can’t blame them.

both of you are caring and love your friends dearly, you are the ultimate mom friends. you love to make everyone happy, and so both of you are always looking out for the other. 

furthermore, gwen would love to hear all about interests - she loves to hear you talk about your reading and writing, and she loves how you learn with such a fervor. learning something new is a great way to increase the quality of your life, and gwen loves to hear about what you’ve discovered - so much of her day is spent in routine, being a servant and all, so when you can tell her something good - something other than castle gossip, she loves it.

also, i have this headcanon that gwen can sing really well, so you know she loves music. she’ll sing in the early mornings, when the two of you are getting up before the sun itself, and it never fails to make you smile.

i think that both you and gwen have great versatility to your personality - you both can get very excited and giddy but then come back down to earth and be stable and strong. this is good because both of you can support the other in whatever situation you may be up against. 

furthermore, you are both witty and teasing. the two of you have a lot of ongoing banter that makes your otherwise monotonous days exciting and fun. you’re upbeat personalities bring joy to your lives, and that’s important.

also, the two of you would be very affectionate toward each other - gwen has no qualms with hugging you or holding your hand, so she is able to accept your affection and return it in a similar manner. and gwen is very good at giving sincere compliments! whenever she praises you, you can’t help but think it’s true.

also, modern! au gwen is an avid movie watcher, so the two of you have marathons together. gwen always brings the popcorn.

PJO/HOO:

I ship you with Travis Stoll!

okay, you cannot tell me that this pairing isn’t chaotic as hell.

you are the smarts to travis’ mischievousness, and the two of you bring a lot of fun to camp half-blood. you help travis and connor with their pranks, but you are also there to make sure that no one gets hurt, because a good prank is one that makes people laugh, but has minimal casualties. (ngl, chb is kind of glad that you and travis got together because the pranks are a lot safer now.)

i definitely think that travis would be the one to bring you out of your comfort zone, but he does it so earnestly, with only the best of intentions, so it’s hard to say no. the two of you go on adventures together and you have a lot of laughs.

the good thing is that you also bring a lot of calm and stability to the relationship - you are one of like two (2) people who can  get travis to just,,, chill with you. he likes to play videogames with you, so you hang out a lot in the hermes cabin, legs tangled together as you chill out. 

at your core, i think both of you are very determined people, and that’s what initially drew the two of you close together. you both have a fire in your hearts, and while that comes out in different ways, you’re both very ambitious and goal oriented people.

and you know that travis has the greatest taste in music - you are going to be introduced to some very interesting and cool songs. maybe he’ll nick a cd or two for both of you to listen to. and what’s cool about his music taste is that it’s adventurous and all over - he loves everything and so do you.

you both explore and learn about the world in different ways, and you are both incredibly knowledgeable in opposite ways, so when you put your heads together, the genius that comes forth is insane.

i imagine that the two of you hang out in the strawberry fields a lot. you listen to music or talk while walking through the fields, and then travis ends up stealing some of your strawberries and you end up chasing after him (damn his tall legs)

LOK:

I ship you with Mako!

this is the complete opposite of your previous ships, but stick with me for a minute

you are perfect for mako because you can be serious and stable, but at the same time, you can bring out his silly side. mako needs someone who can get down to the core of his being and pull out that happy, childish side of himself that he hasn’t found in a long time. he’s had to grow up fast, and he needs someone who is serious and sincere, but is also lighthearted and oh-so caring.

the two of you are so protective and caring about the ones you love - you’re like the parents of the group who are trying to wrangle your unruly children, and it’s a dynamic i am here for.

and when you encourage some of korra or asami’s wild plans, mako sighs, like “disappointed by not surprised.” but then you bring him to the side with a plan on how to make their optimistic plans more secure, and he’s like,,,, alright.

also, the banter the two of you would have is legendary. mako is known as the #done, sarcastic one, and he was not expecting you to come out with amazing wit, but here you are. the two of you have the best side commentary, and it’s almost a competition now. you’ve yet to get mako to laugh at your well-timed jokes (some of which are terribly corny), but he does crack a wry smile almost every time, so you know it’s only a matter of time.

also, convince me otherwise, but mako is a reader. he likes a lot of historical fiction, but also stories based off of legends, and the two of you will often spend your weekends inside, reading on the couch. he’ll make you lunch and then the two of you will talk about what you’ve read, sitting cross legged with your knees touching. mako is usually a little vague with the details on what he is reading, but what often happens is that he’ll have recommended the book you’re reading, so he’ll listen to you ramble about your favorite parts with a lovestruck smile on his face.

you definitely introduce mako to more music - he’s never been super into music, it was always more bolin’s thing, but he’ll listen with you. he has a few favorites, and you have to coax him into telling you what they are, but he’ll tell you anyway because he’s very much in love.

also! the two of you go to see bolin’s movers, and you whisper to each other throughout the show, making jokes and funny comments, and ngl, bolin gets a little concerned. mako should never enjoy himself so thoroughly, that only ever leads to disaster.

anyway, you would be great for mako because when you two hang out, you bring mako out of his shell, and he is always there to support and protect you, should anything go awry. 

i get big vibes of “the serious one is soft for the fluffy one” except both of you are the serious one and the fluffy one, depending on the moment, and you wildly fluctuate between the two.

[hellzyeahwebwielingessays]

Lets debunk the BS from this. Up top a lot of this BS comes from Bob Chipman/MovieBob who is the guy who if you recall said:

-         Superheroes like Superman (and thus by extension Spider-Man who marry civilians were jerks for putting their spouses through the same stuff soldiers’ spouses go through

-         Spider-Man appeals best to teens (even though he provably doesn’t since most people get into him before their teens and he appealed to college students in his heyday)

-         The Spider-Marriage was nothing more than a forced publicity stunt

-         Sins Past is worse than OMD

-         Spider-Man is about passive aggressive power

-         And the best one, ever since OMD Peter and MJ had become ‘more interesting’

That all being said lets dive into this:

Someone asked the panel what a queer reading would add to the character of Miles…Jesus…that’s just the greatest sign of hope for this podcast isn’t it? Shoot me now…

Miles was not 3 dimensional when he was created. Even if you disagree it is nonsense to say that Peter wasn’t  three dimensional when he was first created. Just look at how much Stan explored Peter’s psychology in this singular panel from ASM #50

Look at that. Peter Parker pulled between the two sides of his life. Making a judgement of someone. But then calling out his own judgement of them and acknowledging maybe he’s in the wrong.

This was 1967!

That isn’t three dimensional?

Additionally other people would disagree that Peter wasn’t three dimensional early on.

And even if you disagree with that it’s nonsense to say he hasn’t SINCE become three dimensional or that retaining his origin story (which Miles broadly uses as the basis for his story in every version of his character) somehow holds him back from being three dimensional. If nothing else Peter was at least multifaceted for the time period.

Spider-Man wasn’t an example of stories about a 15 year old made for 7 year olds. Spider-Man was intended to be a senior in AF #15 and the stories were written by Stan for at worst an older audience but at best basically just for him.

Stan Lee confirmed that AF #15 was written not as a one off but as something that if successful COULD become an on-going series.

Its BS to say Peter makes no sense as a character because he makes sense about as much as any character within the confines of the superhero genre can. MILES doesn’t somehow make more sense whatsoever.

No. Spider-Man wasn’t merely a thrown together ‘hey here is a teenage superhero story with a downer ending’ it was a story about selfishness, responsibility and appealed via it’s relative normalcy and lack of idealization of the superhero protagonist.

The psychology and thematic idea of his exclusive powers (invisibility+venom blast) is the same…how? How is disappearing and repelling people the same thing? They keep saying that in the podcast as though it’s obvious and it’s really not

Great Power=Great responsibility isn’t Peter’s catch phrase it’s the philosophy underpinning everything he does

‘The young end millennials have been thrown under the bus by society so the optimism is reserved for the young end millenials like Miles and Gwen’ oh but also ‘you need 5-10 years added to each character to have this make sense and also Spide-Ham doesn’t quit fit’…So…the theory doesn’t  make sense then does it. Also, what optimism is there for teen millenials in the late 2010s? We are all shit scared Global warming needs to be fixed within the next 10-20 years. The young end millenials will not be in much of a position to do that. Maybe not the high-end millenials either. The power rests in older Gen Xers or even older generations. So this ‘generational’ theory is bullshit. Yeah, Miles as the next generation maybe makes sense but not when you apply real world concepts of who the different generations are. Especially considering that’s made up bullshit anyway.

‘Blah blah blah for most of my life I’ve been uninterested in Spider-Man because I’ve believed him to be WHITE MALE teenaged wish fulfilment.’…*internally groans*…oh boy…this woman is one of those  types huh. Frankly I, and I would advocate others too, take a salt shaker with them whenever they hear someone say something like this. But more importantly Spider-Man is seriously NOT what she describes. For starters Peter was a senior in high school when he began and shouldered adult responsibilities when his father died. That’s wish fulfilment? That’s a BURDEN. The reason that spoke to so many people was because he was just different and because his imperfections made him more relatable. The whiteness idea is also bullshit since he was intentionally or otherwise subtextually Jewish and has spoken to countless people of all colours across the generations. He very particularly has a HUGE following among African Americans which was partially what prompted the creation of Miles Morals in the first place!  Shit, the showrunner for the 1994 Spider-Man cartoon was black for God’s sake. Many of the head honcho creators for ITSV were people of colour who were clearly MASSIVE Spider-Man fans!

‘As a woman Spider-Man didn’t resonate with me’. Spider-Man is male. And he acts in ways a male would in the context of the situations. But the character as a whole, in his deepest themes and concepts, is a universal character. He does and has spoken to people across race, gender, sex, sexuality, class, culture and generations. Spider-Girl, Mayday Parker, was her father’s daughter and far more similar than different to him. She spoke to male and female readers. Peter Parker himself has had female fans since his inception. There is no end of female fans here on tumblr or in other online spaces that are the proof of this, to say nothing of old letters pages.

Miles feels more like a real kid and fits together better than most other versions of Peter Parker?...how? I don’t like USM the comic but hwo the fuck do you take that, Spec Spidey, the 1994 cartoon and the Raimi movies (that MovieBob adores btw) and say ‘it doesn’t fit together properly like Miles’. Dude, Comic Book Miles Morales is a teenager in New York who goes to a bordering school for scientifically gifted kids and yet is supposed to be an everyman. That fits together well? He risked his life before  being motivated to do so which is how most 13 year old woudn’t  have acted. Then he feels guilty about Peter dying but his BFF explains it’s not his fault and he accepts this but then goes on to become Spider-Man anyway. And somehow this equates to guilt+responsibility. THAT’s better put together? His character got web-shooters two different ways by the same writer and the guy he was a legacy to was resurrected within like 3 years of Miles’ debut. That’s well put together? This makes more sense and is more believable than a kid who’s Dad dies because he didn’t use his gifts altruistically, so he spends his whole life striving to use them altruistically?

Blah blah blah MovieBob spewing more shit about how Peter is a teenage wish fulfilment power fantasy even though he clearly isn’t from a modern POV and REALLY wasn’t in the early 1960s.

By extension arguing Peter is an adult male’s retroactive teenaged wish fulfilment fantasy of working stuff out is so plainly wrong. Peter Parker in the early 1960s didn’t have everything figured out. The whole world was against him totally unfairly. He needed Aunt May or the Human Torch at times to give him pep talks. His social life was barely existent! You wanna see a middle aged man’s retroactive young wish fulfilment fantasy? Go read Brand New Day, which MovieBob claims was superior to the pre-OMD era. What is the wish fulfilment here? That attractive young women like him? Is that it? That one thing vs. all the horrible shit beating Peter down?

Bob claims there was a lot more Steve Ditko in the early issues of his run compared to Stan Lee because Peter was very angry. First of all Ditko was such a private person claiming he was definitely angry and that the anger was all him is a MASSIVE speculation. Especially considering Stan wrote Spidey as angry plenty after Ditko left. More importantly, Peter wasn’t  angry in the early Ditko issues except for maybe issue #8. He had his moments sure, but it wasn’t at all consistent. He wasn’t raging out or smashing shit like he did later  in Ditko’s run. He was more anxious and neurotic in those early issues which is comparatively closer to how Stan and Romita handled Peter in their earliest issues together. Peter and the whole world of Spidey got angrier towards the end  of Ditko’s run. You know when Stan was letting Steve plot stuff more and more…It’s almost like Bob is full of shit or something

Bob tries to claim by the time ITSV was being written the kinks in Miles’ character had been worked out in the comics. Nah fam. If anything they’d been exacerbated. In reality it was the ITSV writers who took the wonky early Miles character and worked out those kinks themselves, creating an overall superior rendition of the character. A viewpoint I am not alone in.

‘The Prowler has never been a particularly noteworthy villain in the comics’ That’s because he’s not  a villain. He was kind of a villain in his debut but he very quickly became an ally to Spidey

The panel then get into a very pretentious discussion about how ITSV preaches you arne’t stapled to your origin, you are not your trauma. That claiming that is pretentious ala Zack Snyder. But like…isn’t that the POINT of super hero origins? That they contextualize everything about the heroes thereafter? Isn’t carrying his trauma with everything they do practically the point of Batman and Spider-Man’s origins; you know the 2 most popular heroes? Uncle Ben’s death IS stapled to Spider-Man because it underlines everything he ever does. Shit it doesn’t even make sense when applied to Miles in ITSV. He does what he does because his Spider-Man died and then so did his uncle. There is even a whole scene in his dorm room where each Spider-Hero relays the grief that shaped their own lives. I’m not saying you need death and tragedy to be Spider-Man. But that’s neither a bad thing nor something that ISN’T applicable to Peter nor ITSV Miles. Aren’t these idiots supposed to be film buffs? How do you screw up such a basic reading like that?

One of the pundits claimed the movie preaches acting heroically in spite of your tragedies not because of them. Again though…that’ not Spider-Man. Peter is a hero specifically because his uncle died. Miles endeavours to become Spider-Man because his Peter died. His Uncle Aaron’s death further fuels him and allows him to make to final leap of faith. Yes, Peter B. continues to be a hero in spite of his failings but it is only his experiences with Miles that make that possible.

‘They don’t need the tragedies to be heroic they are already heroic in their own right. Look, I don’t disagree with that more broadly. Mayday Parker didn’t need tragedy to be a hero. But in terms of the specific characters in this movie? That’s clearly not true:

This whole ‘in spite of tragedy’ shit is so pre-Marvel DC comics it hurts. Heroes who just innately do the right thing because it is the right thing to do is a dated and archaic invention Spidey and the other Marvel heroes were reacting against.

‘Spider-Man Noir detracted from the film’s message of diversity because he was a brooding WHITE MAN who prowled the night to enact fist based justice!!!!’ Do I even need to say anything to that? First of all literally every hero in the movie enacts fist based justice. Why does Noir operating at night make him worse than Peter B? Why does him being male make that worse than Peni or Gwen? Why does him being white make that worse than Miles or Peni? And as for detracting from the message of diversity, shockingly diversity can be found within the same ethnic or gender group. You know white/male people aren’t a monolith and all that. Plus creatively you want PERSONALITY diversity more than anything else. In this movie in particular you want shorthand conceptual differences too. ‘Spider-Man but an anime mech girl’ ‘Spider-Man but a noir character’. ‘Spider-Man but a cartoon pig’. This is how asinine this disgusting modern day mentality is.

Wow…MovieBob defending Noir from the asinine comment. I’m genuinely surprised. Too bad he doesn’t use the most obvious defence of ‘that is obviously a ridiculous statement to make you moron’

The next topic of discussion was related to Marvel moving away from Gwen as Spider-Man’s dead girlfriend. I spoke a lot about Bob’s ice cold take on that in this post.

He claims they introduced Spider-Gwen because the idea would be taboo and thus would get people talking. HA! Spider-Gwen was done as just a general idea not something to spark controversy. It wouldn’t even BE controversial. Marvel brought back a version of Gwen within 2 years of her death. They brought her back again 15 years after her death. They brought her back again 22 years after her death along with other versions who melted because it was the Clone Saga. During and after all those times they had AUs of Gwen in What If, Age of Apocalypse, Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane and other such stuff. An explicitly AU of Gwen Stacy in 2014 was one of the most aggressively uncontroversial  things you could do.

Gwen’s ballet shoes differentiate her from every other Spider-Man ever. I mean yes in terms of being a dancer I suppose but in terms of being dedicated and studious, training hard and earning immense physical control? There have been plenty of versions of Spider-Man pre-2018 who are like that.

The only way you can make Spider-Gwen work going forward is by not tying it to her death in the canon? Boy…too God damn bad her debut and origin is entirely built upon that. Her origin in the comics and in the movies is built  upon a role reversal because it is Peter who dies to motivate her. Film audiences would’ve still grasped that role reversal because it was only 4 years ago Emma Stone’s highly popular rendition of the character died. And that was in the last pre-MCU Spider-Man movie to boot!

‘The only Iron Man story anyone cared about was Demon in a Bottle’ Actually they only cared about that story and Armor Wars. But yeah, the MCU version is lesser for neither having his alcoholism nor a crippling heart condition. The mere fact people became complacent about that doesn’t mean it wasn’t reductive.

‘These are fictional characters they need to grow and change with the times to remain popular’ Gwen Stacy sucked shit in the 1960s-1970s and was then killed off and defined by her death. Somehow she still  wound up becoming a fan favourite by the 90s and 21st century. Spider-Gwen sucks as a character but not in concept. I never had a problem with the concept. But the idea that she needed to exist to keep Gwen popular is bullshit because Gwen had somehow become immensely popular in spite of being a nothing character. And that even presumes anyone needed to perform maintenance on Gwen to keep her popular. No we didn’t. She was an irrelevant character beyond her death. It’s like saying we need to change Uncle Ben or Bruce’s parents to keep them popular.

Gwen’s affect on Peter Parker was important for awhile but we aren’t that society anymore. It’s not a fucking societal concern!  Putting aside how a 2014 movie did Gwen’s death just a few years before ITSV, Gwen’s death is about a universal human experience.  Death, grief, moving on. Oh, I see. This halfwit mistakenly believes Gwen is an example of women in the refrigerator.

Gwen died because Peter had this perfect lovely girlfriend and everything was too great for him and they didn’t know how to write beyond that. An oversimplification. Gwen died because they needed to shake things up for sales in general. Because Conway shipped Peter with MJ. And a 20 year old Spidey in 1973 really was too young to be killed off. Oh and you know she was written like shit. Yeah that’s the part no one ever talks about. Gwen is played up as this underserving victim of a character but she sucked shit.

It’s almost the 2020s! So fucking what? People still lose loved ones in the 2020s? I’m not even saying Spider-Gwen should have died in ITSV or revolved around her counterpart dying. I’m saying this dumbass is wrong for bringing it up as though killing Gwen off is dated on principle. But this is the same moron who unironically said ‘I never connected to Spider-Man because he is a teenaged white male wish fulfilment fantasy’. I’m sure she got top marks in her gender studies class

‘sOme PpL nEEd 2 gEt oVa iTTTTTTT’ I genuinely wish this person would wake up mute someday.

‘We could do a whole movie about Spider-Gwen’. I don’t respect where this opinion is coming from but I don’t necesarilly disag- ‘Get Seanen Maguire to write it’…nevermind. This gets even worse when you consider Maguire had only been writing Gwen for literally 3 issues at the time this podcast was released. Of the back of three issues  you are declaring this writer qualified to write an entire movie about the character? Not even Jason Latour who created her. I smell someone who just jumped on the bandwagon or worse is blinded by agenda and ideology.

‘Gwen could’ve done with 5 more minutes’ It’s not her movie!  It’s Miles’ movie and secondarily Peter B’s movie because he is Miles mentor. It is through their mutual relationship that Miles learns to be Spider-Man and Peter learns to be Spider-Man again.

It never made sense for an 80 year old woman to be raising a 16 year old boy! Aunt May in the 1960s wasn’t in her 80s. She just looked that way because, duh, standards of health were different back then. A 40 year old now looks much younger and in better health than someone who potentially might’ve been born in the 19th century circa 1962! A working class  woman no less…With chronic health problems! Even if she was in her mid-late 50s her looking like that was totally believable in context! And her raising Peter was also entirely believable depending upon how old Ben and May were when Richard and Mary were born. It’s not beyond possibility at all that there was 15-20 years separating Ben and his younger brother, meaning if Peter was born when Richard was 25, Ben and May would’ve been in their 40s. Thus by the time Peter was 15 they’d be in their 50s or 60s.

These idiots keep treating Peter from Miles’ universe as a bona fide version of 616 Peter when it’s blindingly obvious he’s supposed to be an idealized rendition of the character. A version intended to be a juxtaposition to the version we all know walking into the movie.

Peter B. Parker having a more traditional version of Aunt May as opposed to a more proactive and involved version has left him with a sense of giving up. Er…no. It’s pretty obvious Peter B. Parker is the Spider-Man we know and love who normally doesn’t give up but one string of failures after another has brought him to his lowest. But he rises back up again. Look Peter is supposed to be a representation of human beings. Human beings need people and need emotional support. When you lose those people and are alone you can go to a very dark place. That’s Peter B’s story. If Aunt May had been more involved but everything else went wrong (including her death) he’d have still wound up in the dark place he went to. Blonde Peter might’ve weathered May’s death better in theory but he had OTHER stuff in his life to keep him afloat. Peter B lost most everything. What horseshit it is to argue if Aunt May was different he’d have not given up.

There was no purpose for Aunt May being as old as she was or on the cusp of death in the original comics. Er…yeah there was. She was that old because it made her more vulnerable and thus accentuated the loss of her husband and the need for Peter to be her support network. It also internally justified why she was so frail and unwell. Old people usually have health problems. Duh! But then Bob admits there is a reason for those decisions. So he is contradicting himself.

Bob presumes Blonde Peter told Aunt May his secret even though there is no evidence in the movie to support that idea.

Kids today aren’t resentful of their grandparents like older generations were, that’s why Aunt May is played differently now. Um…Peter was never resentful of Aunt May in the first place. He sincerely loved her and felt he needed to pay her back for all she’d done for him.

‘Kids today have cool grandparents because 50% of them would have been hippies.’ Hippies aren’t cool. And never were. They were pretentious losers that hid behind causes as an excuse to do drugs and have lots of sex. Over half a century later the world they claimed to fight for and want to build has yet to materialise and in fact is in a lot of ways far worse off than it was before their generation rose to the seats of power. The hippy generation are part of the baby boomer generation that are so thoroughly mocked today. The people in power who’ve fucked up the job and housing market for consequent generations. These idiots literally spouted a dumbass theory earlier on about how first wave millenials have been thrown under the bus. Who do you think did that? The baby boomers, many of whom used  to be hippies! And NONE of this demands Aunt May has to be different. I have no problem with her being different in ITSV. But the idea of someone who used to be a hippy being doting? Being a worry wart? Why the Hell is that a dated concept?

These idiots clearly view the world aggressively through an identitarian and group weighted lens as opposed to how the world really is. I.e. 7 billion+ individuals

There was a weird amount of focus upon gangsters in the Spec Spidey cartoon considering it was for kids. Not really, the show was reverential of the original comics. The original comics (which were for children) had lots of gangsters

To the people who bitch and moan about getting another Spider-Man it doesn’t take away from the one you had before. No one was complaining about Miles as another Spider-Man in this movie. People weren’t claiming it ruins the Raimi movies or something. People resent it in the comics because it waters down the brand and makes Spider-Man himself less special when he is an ONGOING character. It’d be one thing maybe if the torch was passed from person to person. But nowadays it’s literally all of them co-existing.

Blah blah bah symbolism of a young black boy fighting a big WHITE business MAN. Blah blah blah this is the type of bad guy Miles would fight in real life blah blah blah…Jesus Christ… these people really just buy that type of Kool-aid in bulk don’t they? As if Miles, were he ‘real’ wouldn’t fight anyone who’s doing bad things. FFS they just got done talking about Tombstone from the Spec cartoon. Tombstone is an African American!  And he’s in this fucking movie. He’s not some weird fantastical guy, he’s a regular gangster who happens to be albino. That’s it. Miles fights him in this fucking movie! Miles first major adversary in the comics was the Prowler who was another African American. Miles wouldn’t JUST fight ‘evil white businessMEN’

‘As far as I know about Doc Ock from Superior Spider-Man, which is excellent’ Wow. So, as would be obvious with anyone with a working brain and some prior knowledge of Otto, Superior is garbage. And saying you are basing your assessments of Otto on Superior is like saying you have never known about the character

Doc Ock is in so many Spidey stories as a scientific assistant to other people because the Green Goblin is always either dead or completely untrustworthy. Bob really just said that huh? This is further proof Bob has read precious little Spider-Man material. Doc Ock is NOBODY’s assistant. Even in Secret Wars he had to be threatened into compliance by Doom himself when Ultron was his attack dog. Doc Ock isn’t recruited by other people for his genius, he is the mover and shaker. He recruits other people and is the man in charge. And who the fuck is looking to get the help of Norman Osborn because he’s a scientist? Not to mention Norman is untrustworthy, oh but Otto?????????? The guy who tried to nuke NYC???????? WTF is Bob talking about?

Since we are in the ‘age of heroes’ (whatever THAT means?) it is impossible for Spider-Man to not be mentored by some other hero. Er…yeah it is? This is obviously a defence of MCU Spider-Man and it holds no water. First of all DC and Marvel have had young heroes show up when there are a plethora of heroes around they’ve not had mentors. Second of all it’s entirely possible for Peter to not WANT a mentor and it’d be entirely believable that the other heroes might not see themselves as mentors or might mistrust him.

The Spider-Heroes take their grief and turn it into action. WHOA WHOA WHOA! Didn’t these guys say earlier that the movie preaches the heroes are more than their trauma? That they aren’t stapled to their origins? That they move on from it? What’s this change of tune all of a sudden?

Miles Dad was probably made into a cop to avoid having a difficult discussion about how the police would react to a black super hero or a black Spider-Man. Yeah, or it’s because you know…his Dad worked in law enforcement in the comics so you know…faithfulness. Also the police don’t discriminate against black heroes in the MCU except Luke Cage. Also, also not every fucking cop is racist. Also, also, also how would they know Miles is black his costume covers his whole body!

Miles Dad was super authoritarian. Dude. He didn’t like vigilantes and he followed basic rules like stopping not abusing police sirens. That’s hardly akin to being a jackbooted fascist.

Miles would’ve had a different relationship with authority and the police if his Dad hadn’t been a cop. Er…no not necessarily. First of all being the son of a cop doesn’t mean he’d have not experienced institutionalized racism from the police. Second of all even if he had experienced that he could still believe in justice and taking down obviously evil and dangerous people like Kingpin.

They never touched upon institutional racism from the police in Luke Cage which was for adults. Er, yes they did. The rapper in the later episodes of season 1 (the Bulletproof Love guy) stated he wasn’t going to call the police. The police were stopping and searching black men in their hunt for Cage. Black people wore shirts with holes in them in order to protect Cage and defy the cops. The rap mentioned how nobody was interested in protecting their neighbourhood.

Nobody wants the tell a superhero story about institutional racism within the authorities. Isn’t that literally Luke Cage’s origin? Didn’t Black Panther mention that earlier in the year ITSV was released.

I’m going to disagree that Miles fighting Kingpin was unnecessary because of the cultural connotations we talked about….God…You couldn’t just say ‘the main hero obviously has to defeat the main villain. Duh!’…

Dan Slott is a dang genius! As if you needed more proof these people are unqualified  to talk about Spider-Man…

Spider-Verse’s (the comic’s) fan service is what happens when you get Spider-Man fans to do the story vs. ITSV. Nah fam. ITSV is what happens when you get real fans who are talented  vs. Spider-Verse is what happens when you get a real fan who fundamentally misunderstands the characters and is a hack

There is no real Peter Parker. Who cares! The real Peter Parker is the original because he is the one everyone else is derivative of and therefore based upon. And fans AND creators and Marvel itself clearly care about that because they sure as fuck didn’t kill him  off so Miles could replace him. They killed off the secondary and surplus Ultimate Peter Parker. Treating the original version as the true  one doesn’t invalidate any other versions because they can still be great characters unto themselves. But given how disgustingly SJW this whole podcast has been I am unsurprised they go in for this participation trophy form of analysis where everything is equal all the time.

It also doesn’t invalidate the idea of Spider-Man being anyone. Spider-Man CAN be anyone. But not everyone can be Peter Parker. If we are going to say otherwise the praise these jackoffs lauded onto Miles for how his specific identity was explored is invalidated. Peter is Peter. Miles is Miles. They can both be Spider-Heroes worthy of the mantle.

Because Miles is a POC people who don’t look like Peter can believe they can be Spider-Man. I’m not arguing against Miles but seriously, that was the case before Miles existed. The showrunner of Spider-Man 1994 was an African American and he related to Peter Parker in the 1960s. Poc can relate to Spider-Man regardless of skin colour.

The original comic book version of Spider-Man isn’t the true one just because he is the original. Er….yeah. It seriously does precisely BECAUSE he is the version all the other ones are derivative of. Hence he’s from the PRIME universe. Shit the Spider-Verse comic book the movie takes mild inspiration from literally says that. Granted it then contradicts itself but the point still stands. Because he is the original one he IS the true one because without him the others would not exist. He is the canonical one!

The true 616 Spider-Man will never be in any adaptation because there is too much continuity…Yeah…so? How does that make him not  the original one in the broad context though when you compare every version?

Continuity is the killer of enjoyment when it comes to movies. No, this podcast is the killer of enjoyment. And btw, maybe ask all the people who went to see Infinity War earlier in the year ITSV was released and ask them if continuity ruined that movie for them. This is such a lazy, myopic attitude.

If continuity is used to exclude people it is bad. Good job nobody was ever saying ITSV shouldn’t exist because Miles isn’t Peter then

Infinity War is a fine movie even if you do not know who everybody is. No it isn’t. Infinity War is wholly inaccessible if you do not know who everyone is because it’s throwing dozens of characters at you with little-no context provided.

Black Panther is better than Infinity War, this proves continuity is bad. No. Black Panther not having to have it’s story wrapped up in everything else in the wider universe was what helped make it better. FFS, Winter Soldier is better than Avengers 2012 and that still relies upon plenty of continuity. Civil War is better than Thor the Dark World and the latter has way less continuity than the former. It’s not about having continuity it’s about how you use it. Black Panther was world building in it’s own corner. It wasn’t plugged in so directly to the wider universe the way Homecoming or FFH was. THAT’s what made it good but that’s not a continuity issue that’s a world building issue.

Continuity is toxic when you use it to claim a long running fantasy series didn’t satisfy you. Uh huh, hey do you wanna ask all the people who hated Game of Thrones’ final season that?

Oh, and one of the pundits, the one who bleeted on about Spidey as a ‘tEEnAgE WHITE mAle wish fUlLfiLmEnt fantasy!’ is a Hollywood actress. Now her views make waaaaaaaaaay too much sense

In conclusion…Sigh…For a podcast called School of Movies I think these guys need to go back to kindergarten.

[mrsspidermanmaryjanewatsonparker]

Its definitely my favourite version of Mary Jane. Who’s changed careers from model and damsel to sassy investigative reporter for the Daily Bugle. A role that gives her more to actually, you know, do and embodies her with a lot of wit and drive. A smart update for a world where the bombshell party girl is no longer the romantic ideal it once was.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqGs09OiyEQ

Let’s debunk this.

Whenever some dipshit talks about MJ not having enough ‘to do’ specifically in relation to her PS4 career it boils down to this.

MJ didn’t do anything in the comics directly related to Peter’s role as Spider-Man.

Which is asinine because the story of Spider-Man isn’t about Peter being a superhero!

It’s about the life of this guy who HAPPENS to be a superhero and exploring how those two sides of his life impact upon one another.

You know the whole great power/great responsibility thing?

Yeah you can basically translate that more linearly to “This character is about juggling the responsibilities normal people deal with against the responsibility of being a hero’

THAT is the damn point.

For example, literally every Aunt May sceanario from the Steve Ditko run.

Oh no, Aunt May is sick Peter has to get medicine for her. He can earn money as Spider-Man to do that but oh no that means he won’t be home to look after her and he’s so worried about her that it might impact how he fights.

Or.

Oh no, Aunt May is sick Peter has to cut out on this crime in progress to go help her!

I’m not saying Aunt May’s character was handled the best back then by any means. But people did adore how she was used in the JMS run where she was you know...also not directly involved in his superhero life.

Fuck even Alfred isn’t REALLY directly involved in Batman’s life but people still love him.* Same for Ganke Lee in Miles Morales stories.

The book is about Peter’s life not specifically his life as a superhero, but everything.

His job, his friendships, his romantic life, his financial straits, everything.

And they impact upon and get impacted by his life as a hero.

At which point Mary Jane doesn’t need  to directly interact with that side of his life because she’s already ‘doing stuff’ by interacting with the Peter Parker side of his life.

Her role works great in a video game because in a video game you aren’t going to play a character who has to study or has to pay the rent or has a mini-game about managing his anxieties and neuroses. Everything revolves and feeds back into what he does in the context of being a superhero which is where you don’t just spend over half the story (like in most Spider-Man yarns) but where you spend the overwhelming majority of the time because that is the whole point.

For many people Peter’s superheroics in the comics isn’t  the point or at best it is only half  the point.

People often say Spidey has the best supporting cast ever and that’s true but that’s a weird goddam statement to make if you define a good supporting cast member as someone who directly contributes in some way to his role as Spider-Man. Because Flash, Harry, Gwen, MJ, Liz, Aunt May, Betty Brant and everyone who wasn’t Jameson, George Stacy, Jean DeWolff or Felicia didn’t do that! 

And yet we were still invested whenever Flash became an alcoholic, or Liz got pregnant, or Harry and MJ’s relationship hit the rocks, or Jameson got engaged or Betty left her husband or whatever.

Why?

Because we cared about these characters because Peter cared about them and we cared about Peter because we were reading it for his LIFE over all not his superhero side of it.

MJ thus would’ve been doing enough by just interacting with Peter via normal life soap opera and human drama. Was it always handled great? No. but the fix for that isn’t giving her something that directly taps into his job as a superhero.

Let’s move on to the rest of the quote.

Being a journalist embodies her with a lot of wit and drive.

Why the fuck does this specific profession innately give people who work that profession these personality traits? That’s not how life works.

More poignantly it presumes that MJ in the comics didn’t have any wit.

And certainly no drive.

And how about that whole ‘bombshell party girl isn’t the romantic ideal it once was’ huh?

Um....what?

First of all a ‘romantic ideal’ is rather subjective. Some people (for the sake of argument let us presume for a moment heterosexual men) want a party girl. Some people would prefer more of a chilled out person. Some guys want a bombshell but other guys might be physically attracted to girls who are more amazonian in their appearance. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Second of all, even by modern stereotypical standards (again from a heterosexual male POV) classic Mary Jane is still absolutely within the ‘romantic ideal’.

Third of all MJ was presented as not  being the romantic ideal when she was introduced in the 1960s. She was played as a foil for Gwen Stacy with Peter (shallowly as young people are want to do) finding her party girl personality a major turn off.

Fourth of all this statement speaks to the absolute ignorance of the author (and many fans) who seem to weirdly think MJ was a party girl when she debuted and then stayed exactly like that until she married Spider-Man.

She didn’t. Her party girl personality had even been reigned in by the time she began dating Peter in the 1970s.

Fifth of all why the fuck is ‘updating’ MJ from party girl going to naturally land on journalist?

Finally let’s tackle the bullshit model and damsel thing.

This mentality needs to fuck off and die ASAP.

MJ was not placed in a damsel-in-distress role any more frequently than most recurring superhero love interests. 

Defining that as her role, as her ‘job’ practically is bullshit, insulting and an erasure of her whole goddam character.

Being a damsel-in-distress isn’t an act of negative penalization upon your character, wherein you can be awesome outside of that instance in the story but it doesn’t matter because you were made into a damsel in distress.

I mean FFS NOBODY treats male characters this way in spite of the uncountable times Robin, Jimmy Olsen, Commissioner Gordon, Harry Osborn, J. Jonah Jameson, Flash Thompson or whoever have been in need of rescue by Superman, Batman or Spider-Man!

I can understand criticising using a female character like that but it’s nevertheless a BAD thing to treat it like it erases and boils down a female character to nothing but that merely because it happened.**

And then there is the modelling thing.

Jesus Christ do I hate the modelling thing.

Not only is MJ’s jobs in wider media NOT as a model, not only was that NOT her first job, not her job for over a decade and never her most noteworthy job...it’s just fucked up. 

It dismisses rel life people with that job as shallow or less worthy and it defines a female character specifically through her looks. 

And real talk MJ being a model is LESS relevant to her character than Peter being a photographer is. Photography isn’t even one of Peter’s passions, science is, science actually speaks to who he is as a person. Photography is just a means to an end. So being a photographer is not important to who peter is as a character and MJ being a model is even LESS important to her character.

And yet people like define her entire character through that job. I dunno if that’s sexist for reasons I talked about above or messed up because it defines her purely through her job when real people are more than the job they do.*** Either way it’s fucked up.

And as a fan it just grinds my gears because the ONLY reason MJ being a model is talked about as much as it is or appeared as much as it has in the comics is BECAUSE writers and fans keep throwing the term around in relation to MJ.

It’s a shitty self fulfilling prophecy

*And Batman unlike Spider-Man actually does  prioritize his costume life over his superhero one.

**And not for nothing the video plays clips from the Raimi movies when talking about her being a damsel in distress (specifically a moment where she was substituting for Gwen Stacy) because of course it does. Because everyone knows judging a comic book character by their comic book versions would be stupid and Dunst MJ is everything comic book MJ was.

***Someone who works as a janitor isn’t less worthy as a person or wholesale defined through that job, they have a life and personality beyond that.

[angeltriestoblog]

Second sem (and freshman year) recap

It’s pretty hard to believe, but another chapter of my college journey is finally over and done with. Since I had ended the first half of the school year in such high spirits, I didn’t really believe upperclassmen when they warned that things were only going to get harder from there. In fact, I even thought I’d be the one to prove them wrong! I mean, with a class schedule that looked like this, how would I run out of time for all the things I both needed and wanted to do? My Tuesdays and Thursdays were practically free, save for that one Math class I had to attend in the morning that I surprisingly never cut.

For the most part of the semester, I was in a chill state compared to everyone else. I claimed that I had successfully adjusted to the demands of higher education to the point where I found what once was an unreasonable workload to be manageable. I was able to make time for my home org’s activities and devote enough attention to the only project I was deployed to, which I touched on a bit in my first recap blog post (linked here in case you want to jog your memory). As previously mentioned, I was assigned as one of the Documentations Heads under the Information Management department of the Career Building Program, a three-phase event that gives its participants a glimpse into the corporate world. We kicked things off with a resume writing workshop that I was lucky enough to join. The facilitator assigned to me gave useful insights that I was able to apply in the creation of my own curriculum vitae, which I am keen on using when it’s my turn to apply for internships and jobs in the future. I obviously don’t have much on it yet, seeing as I’m just a freshman, but the idea of filling it up with more experiences over the years is exciting me in ways I cannot explain.

Our group was even given the opportunity to explore the studio of the country’s biggest network, where we were briefed by executives in communications and IT and toured around the sets of our favorite shows. We even ran into Luis Manzano while he was filming Minute to Win It! Unfortunately, I wasn’t scouted by any representative from Star Magic and spontaneously put in a love team with Donny Pangilinan, but I guess that’s alright.

I also went to Talent Night with some friends (not in pictures: Gela's boyfriend and ICA barkada), which is shocking since I’m honestly not the type to attend parties like this. I’ve always been the girl who stayed home and binge watched YouTube videos on a Friday night. But, I guess the drunk confidence of those I was with rubbed off on me and I managed to pull through! It was also a plus that Timmy Albert was one of the performers: I do pass him by along the corridors quite frequently, but it’s just different seeing him sing and play an instrument in front of a crowd, especially since I’ve loved Roses and Sunflowers even before I got into Ateneo.

One surprise that I definitely did not see coming was participating in Daloy, our annual program that revolves around corporate social responsibility. This year, we decided to shed a light on how this could be seen in the Philippine clothing industry, so it seemed fitting to hold some talks featuring prominent figures in this field, as well as a fashion show to exhibit the collections of local brands that advocated sustainability. I was really interested in the concept when I first heard of it, and initially wanted to go as a mere audience member - little did I know that I would be tapped by the committee to model! To this day, I don’t know how or why I was chosen: from what I know, there were even screenings held a week prior to the event to determine who would get to walk the runway. But, I was messaged three days before and in that short span of time, I had to fit clothes, find pieces in my closet to match them and perfect my walk (which took several tries on my part, given the fact that when shy, I’m stiff as a board).

Agreeing to join was a huge step out of my comfort zone - the closest I’ve ever come to strutting on a catwalk was back when family members would ask me to “walk like a fashion model” as a kid during reunions. So, the fact that it had all paid off in the end, and that I was even complimented for the way I looked and performed beyond what was probably expected, was definitely a huge confidence boost for me. I couldn’t have done it without Nelly, Daloy’s project head who patiently guided me through the entire process before the show.

Shoutout as well to the other ACTM upperclassmen who were so friendly to me this school year. We may not have any pictures together, but you deserve a spot on this post nevertheless: Gella, my "boss" (hehe) who was always so patient when I asked questions and even went out of her way to say such kind words about my writing; Sam Que who made me feel like we had already known each other for so long even if we had just talked for the first time, and Ysagab who constantly reassured me that I was doing a good job even if I was looking like such a rookie.

My presence in events wasn’t limited to those of ACTM, though. I also went to the Loyola Film Circle’s Under the Stars, where I was able to see the live performances of OPM acts and watch one of my favorite chick flicks beneath the beautiful night sky. Since it took place the day after Valentine’s, I was surrounded by Ateneans and their significant others (who didn’t hold back at all when it came to publicly displaying their affection), but I didn’t even mind since I was content in the company of both my college constants and high school friends.

I dropped by Sulyap as well, which was the culminating activity of the Ateneo Heights Writers Workshop and the launch of the chapbook of their fellows. It was one of the busiest Fridays of the school year, but I still made it a point to go, because I wasn’t about to pass up the opportunity to be a part of something organized by my dream org, Ateneo’s premier literary publication. As much as I love my course and the people in it, I have to admit that I haven’t been able to exercise much of my creative side. So being in a room full of like-minded individuals and hearing them speak lengthily about their works and the process that brought them to life was a refreshing experience, a much-needed break from the usual routine. My personal favorite was Unica Hijas by Mikaela Regis, which revolved around a lesbian couple trying to make their relationship work despite the fact that they study in a conservative, all-girls high school - a setting which is all too familliar to me.

It’s also worth noting that I was sorta able to tick a particular item off my freshman year bucket list. And I say sorta, because… well, you’ll see. It’s been a dream of mine ever since to watch a UAAP basketball game live, show up to the arena in a bright blue shirt, cheer as loud as I can when a player makes a point and raise my fist in the air while Song for Mary plays in the background. But, even if I’m consistently in school by 6am, I was never able to get tickets - I couldn’t match the efforts of some fans, who would camp overnight just to get their hands on them. But, just when I thought there was no more chance for me to show my school pride at a match, my friend Mika offered me a free ticket to the Ateneo Lady Eagles’ volleyball match against FEU at the Filoil Arena one Wednesday. We weren’t really on speaking terms before because we were from different cliques, but after bonding over K-Pop, I saw how nice and chill of a person she actually is. So, I didn’t want to turn her down even if I was hesitant to go at first. You see, I was never a fan - in fact, I didn’t know how the game went despite the PE lessons I had back in Grade 5. (Ms. Abella, if you see this, I’m sorry.) But, it didn’t take a lot of convincing for me to agree and I ended up enjoying way more than I thought I would. Fortunately, I was able to catch on when it came to the rules of the sport: the energy of the crowd was contagious as well, and the performance of the players was way too good it was impossible not to shout either out of triumph or frustration. Once we made it to the finals against UST, I even found myself waiting for announcements on where to buy tickets. I didn’t get any though, because they were either sold out due to the ever-increasing demand (ALE fans don’t play around) or there was a conflict in schedule (hi, Enlit play).

Despite this, I streamed the last game and screamed like I was actually in the venue myself. Apologies to all our neighbors, who probably thought someone was getting killed in the house beside theirs. I was so proud when they brought home the championship after three years, I even bought a Team Ateneo shirt (it’s not that hard to guess whose name is on the back) and went to the bonfire with my friends Gwen, Julia and Lou. I had hoped to meet and take a picture with the players, but they were already far too wasted when I arrived. Like, seriously. I saw Maddie Madayag chug a whole bottle of Mule right before my eyes.

So, you could say that it was all fun and games (quite literally) for me until hell weeks eventually rolled in. Plural form intended. I found out that all my professors were just holding back every major requirement until the very last stretch of the semester. Suddenly, my schedule was chock full of presentations and final papers, comprehensive exams and extra classes that put my time management and endurance to the test. I spent many days in Matteo Down just like before, but also started going to the floor above it in case I wanted to suffer in the company of more people. The studying would only continue once I got home: I’d pull all-nighters despite my brain’s and skin’s desperate cries for help, as manifested in my worsening acne. I don’t think I’ve ever felt that stressed in my life, and it’s scary to think that that’s only the tip of the iceberg in the Ateneo.

Coping mechanisms I’ve picked up to help me deal with these unavoidable circumstances would be trying every restaurant along the Katipunan area whenever I had free time (which I will elaborate on more extensively in another blog post, so do watch out for that!) and eventually discovering Pancake House’s corned beef hash, which I love so much I once had it thrice in the span of a week. Another one would be the addition of yet another emotional support K-Pop boy to my collection. After watching My ID is Gangnam Beauty over Holy Week break, I fell in love with Cha Eunwoo and his god-tier visuals, mild demeanor, impressive English skills and heartfelt determination. This led me to binge watching reality show episodes and furiously putting the entire discography of Astro on loop. If you look at my Last.fm, you could see how Crazy Sexy Cool easily climbed to the top of my most played songs, sitting prettily at the #1 spot with over 300 plays in just a little over two months.

Although I constantly had to bear the pressure and stress on my shoulders over the past academic year, I am eternally grateful to Ateneo for equipping me with lessons both within and beyond the realm of academics that have helped me grow into someone I never imagined, but am happy to have turned into anyway. When my naive and starry-eyed self first entered college, I had such high hopes for what my experience would be and proceeded to map out the next four years of my life in accordance with the vision I had in my head. Having just broken free from the metaphorical chains of my previous school, I found it to be the perfect time to transform into a student who excelled academically, had a long and winding list of extracurricular activities and easily built a vast network of connections thanks to her pleasing and magnetic personality. If I got lucky, maybe I’d have one of those so-called “college blooms” and even get myself an actual boyfriend!

This isn’t something unique to me, I bet a lot of people entered this new stage of their lives with the same mindset so I wasn’t the only one in shock upon realizing that it doesn’t always play out that way in real life. Because of these ridiculous expectations we have implanted in our heads, that basically state that we have to be successful in everything we do and fast, we subconsciously keep ourselves from enjoying the process. In our desire to aim high and aspire for perfection in all that we do, we could end up failing to acknowledge the small yet equally important wins we gain along the way: the friend we make outside of our block despite the sheer discomfort we experience in meeting new people, or the answer we gave in class that impressed our most intimidating professor could appear minuscule when placed beside our goal of being straight-A student who’s active in seven orgs. In addition, we deprive ourselves of the allowance to make mistakes, stray from taking the detours and breaks we need to remain functional human beings and often drive ourselves to the point of fatigue and burnout. And when we are still not flourishing and thriving as planned, we fall prey to toxic comparison: we pit ourselves against others who don’t have the same background or circumstances as we do and question why our progress doesn’t match with theirs.

This is obviously such a toxic way to go about things. Talk about sucking the fun out of what’s supposed to be the four most enjoyable years of our lives. Thankfully, over time, I did some growing up, if you will, and channeled the power of acceptance - both of what I am and what I am not, and the will of God (or whichever supreme being you've placed your faith in) who meticulously planned out what’s ahead of me before I was even old enough to know what school was. I now work to the best of my ability, confident that all I have to do is put in my share of the hard work and see where it takes me, and am also more gentle with myself when I make mistakes.

On a somewhat lighter note, I’ve also been able to form my own opinions about very controversial issues on campus: an example of which would be what I think is the best CR - the answer is definitely Arete. You can’t go wrong with its triple killer combo of aircon, bidet and strong WiFi connection. The only possible downside could be the fact that there are usually a lot of people, so it’s not the best option if you’re planning on being loud and… um, smelly. The secluded and fragrant Leong Hall and ever-reliable New Lib restrooms come in second and third place respectively, while honorable mentions include the 2F Kostka CR (but only from 6:00-7:00am, when no one else is around) and this one specific stall in the Socsci building that's spacious enough that I can bring all my belongings inside with me.

Another point for discussion would be the superior place to eat on school grounds: this might cause an uproar, I’m aware, but I still believe it’s JSEC, despite the stark price difference compared to other cafeterias on campus. I was set on trying something from every stall before the school year ended, but I was too fixated on my top picks: I don’t have any regrets though. In fact, I wish I had more of the beef salpicao with calamares on the side from Casa Paella, the Superbowl from Blendabowls and The Coop fries with garlic aioli served on the side. Besides the fact that the food served is satisfying beyond measure, I enjoy the chit-chats I have with the ates and kuyas manning the stalls, who never fail to ask me how I am and tell me about the cute chinito boys they see on campus that they think I might like.

Although I can’t completely rule out Gonzaga, because of this particular stall with quality liempo and a kuya who always gives me a five peso discount. (I’ve been told he does this with girls he finds cute, but I have yet to confirm that). Also, it’s the only place on campus that I know of that sells fresh fruits by the kilo - perfect for those days when I try to convince myself to go on a diet before I relapse and binge eat at Pancake House.

A lot of people do say that ISO sisig is worth the cross-campus walk it’ll take to get there (e-jeep rides are more recommended! An experience in itself! Especially if you’re seated in the back, where there’s a constant feeling of being sucked in a vacuum! But, I digress) - it might just be a matter of preference, but I think it’s overrated. A destination that deserves more attention is the Cervini Hall cafeteria just by the university dormitories. I’ve only been there a grand total of two times so I don’t exactly have any specific favorites on the menu that I recommend, but I’d definitely still go for the homey ambience.

As for superior study places, Matteo Down has been tried and tested several times: I do prefer getting a place opposite to the entrance though, because it does get distracting having to see people enter and go out the door so often. What was supposed to be a study session often ends up becoming a game to see how many people are wearing a striped shirt today. I usually spend time on the fourth floor of the Rizal Library, and get the couch as often as I can because of the comfort (and charger) it provides.

Of course, I wouldn’t have been able to power through this year without the help of my closest friends: Sevi, Gwen, Raya and Christine. I always had this nagging fear in the back of my head that I wouldn’t be able to find a tight-knit group once I got to college, but thank you for proving me wrong. Thank you for letting me be my true self, for entertaining even my most random thoughts and for accepting all the kalat that comes with being my friend. I sincerely hope that we stay together and have more Gino’s dates in the future along with Chloe!

To Gela, Jill, Shar (and Dom, but we don’t have any pictures together except for the last one HAHAHA) - I didn’t expect at all that I’d be writing about you guys. I was so intimidated by all of you at first, because I felt like we were so different in terms of our upbringing and environment. But after getting to know you, I came to realize that you are seriously some of the most down-to-earth, chill people ever. Thank you for always providing quality chismis, volunteering to find me chinito boys to date and giving me apps to make my IG stories look cuter.

To the rest of X1, we weren’t exactly the most united and we knew that - it’s just that we were probably the most diverse out of all the groups in our batch, and with that comes clashing personalities and differing opinions and interests. But, nevertheless, I am content with the time we managed to spend together, where I was able to get to know all of you!

To the friends that I made outside of my block (and even my course), thank you for laughing at my jokes and telling me that I'm fun to talk to. Hopefully, we get to hang out more and maybe even have common classes in the future hehe

To my Enlit section, we barely spoke to one another during the first semester so I fell under the impression that you were all stoic and no fun to be with. But, I was proven wrong eventually. I wish I was able to talk to more people in LL, but to the classmates I was closest to (Dootie, Cyrah, Czarina, She and Jessa), I will never forget our side comments and mini-rant sessions. I heard we’re having another English subject come sophomore year, and I really hope I end up with you guys again.

All in all, there is no other word that could sum up the experience that was my freshman year in college better than “adventure”. It was every single emotion on the spectrum All At Once, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world - in fact, during the first half of the semester, I admit that I’d entertain thoughts of alternate universes where I’d be an Iska/Lasallista/Tomasino out of sheer curiosity, but now I just can’t imagine myself anywhere else. Anyway, enough with all that drama. I’m going back to school in three weeks to start my summer term, which we fondly (lmao) refer to as intersession. So, there’s technically nothing to miss.

Hope the rest of you enjoy the summer break that I unfortunately will not be able to experience until I graduate from college! Wishing you nothing but love and light, always.

Angel

[jamesginortonblog]

The moment James Norton decided he might actually want to be an actor was during his appearance as Gwen Stefani in the school miming competition, when he was 11.

Most people chose songs by a boyband, or Coolio, but Norton picked Stefani, because he loved No Doubt. It was a boys’ school and the female costume department wasn’t very well-equipped – one pencil skirt and a blonde wig between them, whether you were Cleopatra or Courtney Love – so everyone assuming a female role looked rather similar, with very badly applied lipstick. ‘Really young weird drag queens is what we looked like,’ remembers Norton.

A video exists of this debut. ‘And in the first verse I was clearly terrified. But then I remember feeling the audience and being fuelled by them.’ By the second verse he starts to strut, out of nowhere, and the connection was made. ‘F— yeah!’ thought Norton. ‘This is it!’

Here we are 20 years later and Norton is having the time of his life. In what has become a varied career curriculum – a pop star (Gwen Stefani), a padre (Sidney Chambers in Grantchester), a prince (Andrei in War & Peace) and a psychopath (Tommy Lee Royce in Happy Valley), not to mention his theatre roles – Norton has managed to escape the sort of typecasting that could have defined him.

He is a good-looking, fairly posh, highly accomplished and intelligent actor, who in a short time has become very famous indeed.

When we meet he is rehearsing a role in Belleville (which has now just opened) at the Donmar Warehouse in London, and his reputation is set to soar with his new television role – as a young hedge-fund manager in McMafia, the BBC’s eight-part exploration of financial corruption and global organised crime.

Inspired by Misha Glenny’s book of the same name, the series was written by Hossein Amini (who wrote the 2011 film Drive) and James Watkins, who also directed it.

It was shot over eight months in London, Croatia, Moscow and Tel Aviv, with an international cast, including David Strathairn and Faye Marsay. Norton plays Alex Godman, the son of Russian exiles with mafia connections, who has been working to distance himself from his family’s reputation.

Glenny’s book is a masterful piece of investigative journalism and has quite a reputation with both law enforcers and gangsters.

‘Actors can be brilliant at what they do but they don’t necessarily engage in the issues or environment beyond their role,’ says Glenny, who acted as an adviser on the series. ‘James gets the character, and the environment and the issues. He has an extraordinary ability, which enables him to make this very subtle 180-degree turn over the eight episodes.’

It’s a Michael Corleone type role. When Norton was cast, the director told him that what they were hoping for in Alex Godman was part Sidney, part Tommy – somewhere between the vicar and the psychopath. Norton believes McMafia has a valid, topical message, what with the Paradise Papers and the climate of tax evasion, Russian interference and widespread corruption.

‘There’s such an appetite for it now; everyone wants to see what state-level corruption looks like. It’s a catalyst for a conversation, and hopefully we can use it to mobilise something – because of the way that financial institutions are structured, it’s impossible to police that grey area where legality ends and criminality begins.’  

If I ever turned up in a convertible my family would just laugh We meet for breakfast in the Covent Garden Hotel on a cold November morning, before Norton’s rehearsal at the Donmar.

He is chatty and engaging and it is not long before we get on to the subject of his 92-year-old Great Aunt Grania (most interviews with Norton mention James Bond and his Great Aunt Grania), known for her confidence-boosting prowess. He tells me about the time when she looked at him quizzically over dinner and said, ‘I can’t understand why you look so good on the screen James, when you look so bland in real life.’

I don’t like to contradict a 92-year-old, but I beg to differ with Great Aunt Grania. Norton is much better looking in real life than on television. His face is full of light; so is his voice – and he laughs a lot and is ready to be amused at all times. He seems curious, well balanced and up for anything. I imagine he comes from a very happy family.  ‘I do,’ he says. They are, he says, his great leveller.

‘And you do need that constant reminder of who you were before the madness started. I am lucky to have such a normal, grounded family who are really supportive. They enjoy it all through me and I enjoy their enjoyment of it, but they’re never going to be seduced by it. Which means that hopefully I won’t get seduced by it either. If I ever turned up in a convertible my family would just laugh. The person I was at 25 is exactly the same person I am at 32.’  

Norton was born in London but grew up in Malton, North Yorkshire. Both his parents worked full-time – unusual, he says, at that time for where they lived.

His father was a university lecturer and his mother started off as a nurse. ‘She didn’t come on holiday with us for several years because she was doing a PhD in her spare time. She’s a strong woman and an amazing example to us.’ His younger sister is a doctor.

Norton went to the local primary school and had a thick Yorkshire accent (not dissimilar to that of Tommy Lee Royce) then went to the public school Ampleforth College.

‘I didn’t love school. They were not the happiest five years of my life. I didn’t fit in. I hit puberty quite late, which made quite a big difference. I loved theatre and music, which wasn’t as cool as liking rugby and smoking. Also I really enjoyed the academic side and worked really hard; school set me up in a way because I wasn��t popular so had more time to work.’

He doesn’t come from a religious family, but Ampleforth was a strong Catholic school. ‘It was extraordinary. It’s stunning, set in this big valley which was often bathed in morning mist. And you have prayers three times a day, so it was really quite a magical, mystical place.’

Because he was unhappy at school – he was bullied a bit, but not badly – Norton made friends with the chaplain, Father Peter, who became a sort of therapist. A relationship with faith developed ‘but it was more of a fascination and a comfort than a belief’.

After school, ‘I sort of let rip. I went off on an eight-month wander around South Asia on my own and I went a bit crazy. I finally felt comfortable in my own skin – there’s so much contention in that small, pressure-cooker environment of school so when I found people I loved and who loved me it was an amazing relief.’

He spent three months teaching in Nepal then went to India (with a tiny battered little Nokia - no smartphones back then) and had a wild, eye-opening time.

The theatricality of faith in Nepal really appealed to him. ‘Every day seems to be some sort of religious festival; it’s so imbued in their culture and their daily lives.’

When he went to Cambridge he read theology, ‘but I’m not religious; I’m intrigued. And I studied mostly Hinduism or Buddhism, not much Christian theology at all, which was really awkward when people would come up to me on the set of Grantchester and say, “You know – from Corinthians, Chapter Two” and I hadn’t a clue what they were on about.’

He got a first from Cambridge, but still managed to fit in a lot of theatre and alcohol while he was there, and had a relationship with a girl who directed him in several theatre productions; he still wears a bracelet she gave him today. It reminds him, he says, of the second time when he suddenly felt he could be an actor.

‘It was probably the moment it turned from a dream into a reality,’ he says. By the time he left university he already had a place at Rada. ‘It’s such a great feeling when someone asks you what you want to do with your life and you can reply “I’m an actor” – rather than, “I want to act.”’

To support himself, he worked as a children’s party entertainer in the holidays.  Norton graduated from Rada six months early, having secured an agent and made a brief appearance in An Education in 2009. His first major theatrical role was in Laura Wade’s play Posh at the Royal Court in 2010, about the Riot Club, a fictionalised version of The Bullingdon Club at Oxford.

‘There were 10 guys in the cast and every evening, after the play, we’d spend all our wages on booze. It was like a sports team.’  In 2011 he appeared in a revival of Journey's End at the Duke of York theatre, to this day one of his favourite roles.

A solid two years of theatre followed. ‘There were endless conversations with my agent about trying to nail a film role – and then suddenly you break through and your schedule changes – especially if you get a recurring series like Grantchester or Happy Valley – and you have no time left for theatre.’

He then went four years without doing a play at all – until last year’s Bug at the Soho Theatre, and now Belleville at the Donmar. Belleville is a punchy piece of writing by Amy Herzog about a young couple who’ve graduated from Yale and decide to move to Paris. Norton plays a doctor; Imogen Poots is out of work his actor wife. They’re living the American dream, but they have a certain sense of entitlement, and, inevitably, everything falls apart.

Norton didn’t know Poots before they were cast, but they were soon rehearsing sex scenes together. ‘I had only met her two weeks before. You have to just trust, and let yourself be vulnerable.

'Of course it has a brilliant side to it – you get to know someone so quickly and intimately, and you build fantastic relationships; similarly with the director.  I think the definition of an extrovert is someone whose energy is fuelled by other people, which I think I am – so a rehearsal room is a joy.’

Norton appeared in the TV series Death Comes to Pemberley (2013) and Life in Squares (2015), but it was three roles in fairly quick succession that made him a household name: firstly, as the 1950s cleric Reverend Sidney Chambers in Grantchester (2014-17), which had three series.

This, he says now, is the most fun he has ever had on set, mainly because of his friendship with Robson Green, who plays Inspector Geordie Keating. (At one point Green was ordered off set by the director because they were laughing so much.)

He also played Prince Andrei Bolkonsky in Andrew Davies’ revered six-part adaptation of War and Peace (2016), and Tommy Lee Royce in Sally Wainwright’s brilliant BBC police drama Happy Valley (2014-16), which won a Bafta, and saved him, he says, from a life sentence of period drama.

Wainwright, the gifted writer of Last Tango in Halifax and Scott & Bailey, had seen Norton on stage in Journey’s End, but he was still pretty unknown when the call went out to audition for the part of Tommy Lee Royce, the psychopathic killer who becomes Sgt Catherine Cawood’s nemesis in a small town in West Yorkshire.

Norton already had the right accent from growing up in Malton. He was sent the script while he was in South Africa doing a ‘rather ropey’ film about Vikings, and he recorded his audition on video. He was very impressed by the screenplay, but didn’t really think he’d get the part. So, he says, he had nothing to lose, and went for it.

‘The character was so rich… my [audition] scene was the most incredible piece of writing, where a man is so sad and damaged that the most loving act he can think of to do for his eight-year-old son is to kill him.’ Not long after, he got a call from his agent to tell him that the part was his. ‘Being offered Tommy changed my life because it’s opened so many doors. It showed that I could play the baddie.’

And he did it memorably. As Tommy Lee Royce he was horribly convincing – so much so that once when he was in a queue, the girl in front of him turned round and saw him, screamed and ran away.

Last year, he was tipped to be the next James Bond, and became the bookies’ favourite. He gets asked about it constantly, but there's not much to say.

‘It would come with incredible challenges, but beyond that I haven’t thought about it at length because it’s so speculative and silly. I’m flattered that people would even consider me. But I’m also a huge fan of Daniel Craig, so would want him to do a few more films.’  

Happy Valley, which won a Bafta, saved him, he says, from a life sentence of period drama Norton is permanently busy. He has just filmed the remake of the ’90s classic Flatliners; today he is rehearsing for Belleville and then recording voiceovers for McMafia, this evening he is attending a ball in aid of JDRF (Junior Diabetic Research Fund).

He has type 1 diabetes, having developed it when he was 22. His mother and his sister are also diabetic. He injects himself several times a day, but has incorporated it into his life and doesn’t let it deter him. ‘So for example, the kedgeree is about to arrive and I’ll have an injection to counter the carbs; it’s just about having a level of awareness about what you’re eating.

‘It’s interesting being on stage or on set because your body is full of adrenalin and that screws up your sugar, especially when I’m on stage for a full hour and a half. I have to anticipate it at the beginning of the show and make sure my sugar levels are going up or are at least stable. In period plays, I’ve had to stitch little pockets in my costume for sugar tablets.’

A few years ago, during a performance of Journey’s End, Norton was shaking a bit, and sweating from the adrenalin because the play was going well, but one of the other actors thought he was hypoing and told the stage manager.

‘Pandemonium broke loose. The next thing I know, they’re improvising and offering me Lucozade in a teacup, saying, “Cup of tea, sir?” and putting biscuits all over the dugout. So there have been moments where diabetes and theatre have collided.’ But since he started talking about it, he’s realised that he can have a positive influence on young diabetics and demonstrate that it’s a manageable condition.

What else? He lives in Peckham, in a house full of vintage clothes left over from when he used to run a clothes stall in Nunhead, and firmly refuses to talk about his love life, despite what I thought was some rather persuasive questioning on my part.

‘Let’s leave that one vague. Just say that at that point I started tucking into my kedgeree…’ He smiles broadly, disarmingly, but he is steely. Somewhere between a vicar and a psychopath.

[littleredroseonthevalley]

Red Rose - Chapter 2

Prologue Ch. 1 CH. 2  Ch. 3 Ch. 4 Ch. 5 Ch. 6 Ch. 7 Ch. 8 Ch. 9 Ch. 10  Ch. 11 Ch. 12 Ch. 13 Ch. 14 Ch. 15 Ch. 16 Ch. 15 Ch. 16

Summary: In a bind, Riley is forced to make a thoughtless choice. Drake remembers someone long forgotten.

Rating: T - Content not suitable for children.  Suitable for teens, 13 years and older, with minor suggestive adult themes.

Notes: Hi, everybody! How are you feeling this Monday? I had planned to thank personally everybody who liked and reblogged last chapter, but with my ILITW rant last Tuesday (which you can read here), the likes and reblogs got mixed up and I lost track of people. So, thank y’all!

(I’m still mad about ILITW, btw)

As I said earlier today, I’m trying this new thing with pictures. Think of them as a still of a significant moment of the chapter, with the line written underneath. Tell me if you like them, if you hate them or if you don’t think nothing about them at all, my ask is open!

More new content is to be released tomorrow, so stay tuned!

Vienna, Fall 2005

The classes were finally finished in the university. The students were slowly but surely abandoning their hermit-like study abodes and again joining their friends in the celebration of a job, if not well-, at least done.

Drake Walker, like any other student, was certainly overjoyed to be free of classes, even if it meant going back home. 

He could hear himself thinking that, and he knew how weird it sounded like. The truth was, while he certainly missed his sister, facing his mother is always an ordeal.

He supposed he missed Liam, too, he weighed. Even though, his geographic location is meaningless in that front. He can be in Vienna, Avlona or Beijing, the odds are he won’t be able to see his best friend.

No time to think about those things now, he told himself, it was a party. One he wasn’t all that thrilled to attend, to be fair, but he forced himself to come to them every once in a while, to get the guys from his hall off his back about it.

The end-of-year one seemed the most appropriate.

One thing he really missed from the Brigades was the alcohol. Pouring himself another drink, cheap beer, he leant against the wall and observed the people dancing around him. A couple of his friends called him into the dancefloor, but he motioned his drink.

A couple minutes in, the lights dimmed, the people cleared space in the middle of the living room of the apartment, a makeshift dancefloor. Gwen Stefani’s voice sounded through the speakers.

Ooh this my shit

All the girls stamp your feet like this

Few times I've been around that track

So it's not just gonna happen like that

'Cause I ain't no hollaback girl

I ain't no hollaback girl

Two girls, a blonde and a red-head, do a seemingly-carefully rehearsed choreography. The crowd goes wild with their bold moves and synchrony.

As they finish, grandiose, their spectators warmly applaud their number. Drake, however, scoffs. He finds those girls to be just a pair of attention-starved wenches, and he’s seen plenty of them back in Cordonia.

As he finished yet another cup of beer, someone calls for his attention. “Hey, Grinch.” It was the red-head from before. “Why all that brooding?”

He sneered. “I’m not brooding.”

“Yes, you are. And it’s killing the party’s vibe.” She said, crossing her arms on her chest.

God, he hates redheads. Between this loser and Olivia, he was pretty sure the only reason they existed was to annoy him. “I don’t care much for dancing.”

“So far, you’ve only given me reason to bet you don’t care much for fun at all!”

Slightly crossed, Drake said: “No need to look like an idiot to have fun.”

“No need to be an ass, either.” He seemed to go and say something, but she beat him to it. “Hey, What’s-Your-Face…”

“Drake, the name’s Drake.”

“Linda Rosa, charmed.” She made a flaunt with her hair and used an extra-snotty tone. “I bet you I can make you have fun tonight.”

He laughed, half of the absurdity of the idea, half of the arrogance of the redhead. “Oh, yeah? What you have for me?”

“Considering your disgruntled face every time you put your cup into your mouth, I’d say you’re a man of fine tastes in alcohol.” She told him, mockingly. “I have a bottle of the finest scotch you’ll find on this town in my bag. Tell you what, do as I say and make a sincere attempt of enjoying yourself tonight. If you still wanna leave in fifteen minutes, you can go home with it.”

“Fifteen minutes?” Drake lifted an eyebrow. “That’s it?”

“That’s it.”

“You’re on, Linda Rosa.”

She pulled him to the dancefloor.

 In the next morning, he woke up with a pounding headache, most likely a killer hangover. Yet, he felt numbly happy.

Never one was happier to lose a bet before, he was sure.

An amused thought passed through his head, about how he should check himself on a clinic, to see if that girl put something on his drink. Certainly it was out of character for him to behave like that. Even when drunk.

As he got up and dressed, he walked to his front door, to check for mail. In there, it was a bottle of booze with a note stuck on it.

“I never told you what I’d get if I won the bet. I got a good companion and a nice time. To thank you for your sportsmanship, enjoy this whiskey. ~Linda Rosa”

Out of character it might be, but, Drake decided, sometimes it was nice to act uncharacteristically.

New York City, Fall 2015

“I’ll be back for you in the morning.” He had said. “Don’t even try to escape. We have you watched. It’s time for you to come back.”

Riley hasn’t slept at all. She was at her wit’s end. All night she thought of a plan, but anything she could come up with seemed fit to ease her escape. She was starting to believe she had to face reality, she would have to return.

Her most precious belongings were already packed. The only important thing left was hung, majestic, on the wall. The thought of putting it down brought tears to her eyes, but it had to be done.

She was motioning to get the job done when she heard a knock on her front door.

“Riley?” A voice she couldn’t quite place called from the other side. “Are you there?”

“Who is it?” She shakily asked the stranger.

“It’s Maxwell, from last night!” The cheery tone quelled her angst.

Quick on her feet, Riley opened the door and motioned for him and, surprisingly, Drake to come inside.

Not waiting for her to inquire, Maxwell jumped to talking. “We’re heading back to Cordonia, so Liam can find someone to marry and all that jazz. But, before I go, I’d like to invite you to join us!”

“Come again?” Riley asked, in shock.

“Sorry, was I speaking too fast? My brother says I do that sometimes.”

He definitively was, but that was not the case in point. “No, I mean, what do you mean me going off to Cordonia with you?”

He frowned, confused. “Well, that. What’s so strange about it?”

Drake rolled his eyes, but did not say a thing.

“God, sweetie, don’t open that door.” Riley thought, and then outloud answered: “Lots of stuff, but mainly ‘what for would I go to Cordonia’?”

“To compete for Liam’s hand, of course! Didn’t you know about how things work up there?”

“Liam kinda explained to me last night.”

“There you go! You wouldn’t normally be able to join, but I want to sponsor you!”

“Sponsor me? Maxwell, I don’t seem to understand.”

“I’m from a noble family, but I don’t have any sisters, so we don’t have anyone in the competition for the prince’s hand. So, we can choose any girl, and you’re my pick!”

“You want me to compete in a The Bachelor-like event to marry Liam?” She asked, incredulously. “What is in for you?”

“If you accept, you’ll owe me three boons, each favor fraught with more peril than the last.”

“Now, seriously, please.”

“I’m just trying to help you out, Riley.” He said earnestly. “We’re kinda crunched for time, though. I’ve got a plane leaving within the hour, so no time to waste! The Masquerade, which opens the event, is tomorrow night!”

“So…” She breathed out. “A fancy Masquerade… And what else?”

“Fun stuff! Yachting in the Adriatic, skiing in the mountains, dancing in the Royal Palace… Or, y’know, you could just stay in New York. Go back to your gig, with your crappy boss. Sure, is just as good.”

Of course, staying in New York wasn’t an option anymore. The man from last night was taxative when he told her they would be leaving. While everything this man was spewing seemed insanity, he was, right now, her best chance of escape, so perhaps she should explore the possibility.

“Okay, okay, you got me. Anything if I can be as far away from Frank as possible.” She smiled. “But we have a problem, my passport is expired. They won’t let me leave.”

They weren’t the US Immigration, not that Maxwell needed to know.

“No problem-o!” Maxwell said, excited. “We have diplomatic passports and a private plane on a US Air Force base. We can get you out of the country. When we get to Cordonia, Tariq’s friends with the American consul, he can get you a new passport.”

Diplomatic passports and airplane on a Air Force base meant undetectable traveling. Even with all their resources, they couldn’t know she left the city, much less where she went.

“If that’s so… I’m in!”

“Yeah! Go pack your bags.” If only he knew. “This is going to be the adventure of a lifetime!”

She went back to her room and shoved all her dresses and perfumes into three huge bags, in addition with the trunk containing her valuables. She made a point to leave most of her regular clothing and shoes in her wardrobe, as to, when the guy from last night comes back to fetch her, he’ll think she intends to come back shortly.

All done with the packing, she came back to the living room, where Maxwell could not be seen. Drake, however, was watching intensely the painting on her wall.

“Hey, Drake,” He jumped, surprised. “What are you looking at?”

“This painting.” He said.

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it? I’ve bought in a trip once. It’s…”

He cut her off. “Hagia Sophia. Yeah.”

She waited for a second, and then said: “Where’s Maxwell?”

“He went out to call a cab.”

“Oh” Riley said. “Could you help me? The bags are kinda heavy…”

He hmphed, but followed her into her room. “Jesus, Riley. Don’t you know the concept of travelling lightly?”

“It’s not like I know the climate in Cordonia, the occasions I’ll be needing clothes or even how long I’ll stay out!” She defended, in a snarky tone.

Drake was about to reply when Maxwell came back, announcing their cab has arrived.

Once a few thousand feet from the ground, flying through Sicily and Tunisia, Maxwell finally said: “Say goodbye to New York and hello to Cordonia!”, making a point out of the flare in which he said ‘Cordonia’.

“I can’t believe this is actually happening.” She couldn’t believe she escaped.

“Believe it.” Drake bite. “We’ll be landing soon, ready or not. And if you’re not ready, those ladies at court are gonna eat you alive.”

“Jesus, Drake! Don’t scare her!” Maxwell chastised.

“They should be afraid of me, Drake.” Riley answered.

“Cocky.” He answered with a side smile. “You might actually survive.”

She shrugged. “I don’t get why are you being so grim about, that’s all.”

“Look,” He said. “No offense, but I’ve seen girls like you come and go. It never ends well. Not for you, not for Liam, not for the royal family.”

Maxwell saw a point into defending her honor: “Riley’s not some crown-chaser!”

God knows how much that statement is true. “To be fair, Drake, you’re more my type of guy.” He scoffed at her, which flared her with white rage. Not one to betray it, she calmly said: “I mean it. I don’t usually go for rich boys, much less royalty.”

As she finished her sentence, Maxwell tells her they were approaching the Cordonian capital city.

As she looked out the window, she breathed “It’s something out of a fairy tale…”

“If you burst into song, I’m jumping out of this plane.”

“The window is open!/So's that door!/I didn't know they did that anymore!/Who knew we owned eight thousand salad plates?” Riley sung the first cartoon song that came to mind. Soon enough, Maxwell accompanied her: “For years I've roamed these empty halls/Why have a ballroom with no balls?/Finally they're opening up the gates!”

Drake groaned.

“So, Riley!” Maxwell wondered. “Are. You. READY?!”

“Heck yeah!”

Argyrocastron, Cordonia, Fall 2015

As they were going out of the plane, she noticed a sign off the airstrip.

Αεροδρόμιο Αυλωνά

Aéroport de Vallonna

Avlona International Airport

“Those are the official languages in Cordonia.” Drake surprised her from behind. “Greek and French.”

“Oh, right!” Maxwell was reminded of something. “Do you speak French?”

“Mais oui, Maxwell. Parfaitement.”

Drake scoffed. “How about Greek?”

“Fysiká!” She said, smugly. “Ézisa me mia ellinikí oikogéneia ótan píga sti Néa Yórki.”

“Say what?” Maxwell inquired in French. “You’ll have to repeat that for me.”

“I said,” Riley explained, also in French. “I lived with a Greek family when I moved to New York. I’m fluent in Greek too.”

Drake was close to a pout, having failed into busting her. Maxwell is more amendable. “Forgive Drake. Greek and French are taught in schools in Cordonia, but I guess you’ll be using more French, most nobles don’t speak Greek.”

“So, he was just out to get me?”

“Yeah, that sums it up.”

“Jerk.”

New York City, Fall 2015

“What do you mean you’ve lost her?!” The voice screeched on the phone.

“I’m most sorry, but…” He tried to explain himself, but was soon cut off.

“Sorry doesn’t cut it!” The word ‘sorry’ was spit out like it tasted foul. “Haven’t we explained to you how vital is this assignment, or do you just not understand what we tell you to do?!”

“I do understand.” He said, tersely. “And she did escape from me, but all her clothes and cash are still in the apartment.”

“She has her means, you moron!”

“No, no, wait!” He grew nervous. “The painting! The painting is still here!”

There was a short silence on the line.

“Is it?” They said, finally.

“Yes. Yes, it is.” He breathed relieved. “We are monitoring all the airports, bus lines and ships coming in and out of the tri-state area. She won’t be able to leave or to return without our knowledge.”

“Yes… I suppose that is for the best.” The voice conceded. “Leave the underlings in New York and come back. We need to regroup. Bring the painting, with the utmost care.”

The line went dead.

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­Avlona, Cordonia, Fall 2015

The hour or so of roads down the hills to get to Cordonia’s capital city were uneventful. Maxwell excitedly commented the songs playing on the car’s radio, while Drake brooded.

Riley gave limited attention to Maxwell’s antics, as she worried about the next few months.

As they got closer and closer to the shore, the temperature rose. Up in the airport, it was cooler than New York, the skies were gray, and she heard a Grecian couple talk about the possibility of a hoar-frost that evening. The suburbs of Cordonia’s capital, though, seemed to be living in an eternal summer. The people on the street were scantily-clad, as to resist the heat coming from the pavement, the sun was shining, no sign of rain, much less a frost, on the skies.

“Maxwell,” Riley interrupted his tirade about a rather unknown singer to her.

“Et tous les bourgeois du 16ème/Se demandent pourquoi je t'aime/Pour n'avoir pas besoin d'un zoom/Quand toi et moi on fait boum boum boum,” He sung, not really hearing her.

“Maxwell!” She called a little louder.

“Hm? Oh, yes Riley?”

“Why is so hot in here?” She asked. “Aren’t we in the middle of autumn?”

Drake laughed cruelly. “It is never cold out here. We go to the beach on Christmas.”

“Really?!” She asked, somewhat surprised.

“Not really,” Maxwell corrected. “It gets a little cold on December, but Drake’s right. You won’t be seeing snow in Valona.”

“That’s kinda odd…” Riley said. “Dunno, I guess I’m used to cold weather.”

Maxwell laughed. “You will get plenty cold when we go up the mountains. People say that in Lythikos is never sunny!”

Drake smirked, while Riley pretended she knew where Lythikos was.

They took a turn into a modern city area, with tall, glassy skyscrapers into a residential area, with classy, ancient buildings. Soon enough, they were going up once again, through a wide avenue decorated with flowers. The streets were full of people, though with few cars. There were lots of flags, too, which she assumed was the Cordonian national flag.

The densely built avenue suddenly gave place to a wooden area. As they made a curve to the left, she saw a tall wall and a strongly guarded gate.

Behind all that, there was still a long road and lots of trees, but she could see, glistening on the horizon, the pavilion. It was the Palace of the Brigades, her memory provided. The hill in which Napoleon and the first king of modern Cordonia proclaimed the country’s independence from the Turks. The official residence of the Cordonian monarchy.

“Welcome to your home for the next few months, Riley.” Maxwell told her.

“I didn’t realize I’d be staying in the Royal Palace all this time.” She said, dazzled.

“Most of nobility live here while the season is underway.” The cage system, Riley remembered, very French of them. “Including all the ladies vying for Liam’s hand.”

“Yeah, living under one roof just makes it easier to attend the rose ceremony later.”

Maxwell rolls his eyes. “Drake’s just kidding… About the roses, I guess.”

Maxwell took her to see her room, while Drake went off on his own. A mean thought went through Riley’s head, on the lines of she couldn’t be happier to be rid of the ‘lowly’ company. She wasn’t in the palace for five minutes and she was already snobbier. She laughed inside, partly of jest, but also out of nerves. The next feel months would be interesting.

“So, what’s the deal with Drake?” Riley asked. “Why he’s so jaded?”

“Oh, don’t mind him.” Maxwell answered her as they climbed their way to her room. “Drake’s never really… fit in.”

“Not used to courtly life?”

“Definitely! He’s not of noble blood. He’s always been an outsider here, even if he’s Liam’s friend.” He breathed and stopped by a door. “Here we are. In case if you need something from me or my brother, we’re just next door, okay?”

“I didn’t know you had a brother.”

“Yeah, an older brother.” He smiled tersely. “Bertrand of Beaumont, Duke Ramsford. As the eldest, he’s the heir and I’m the spare. You’ll see him tonight, he’ll be excited to meet you.”

Somehow, she didn’t think it’d be the case.

“Maxwell?”

“Yes?”

Riley looked mirthfully at the bed. “Is anything keeping me from jumping on the bed?”

“Only your dignity.”

She laughed. “Fools!”

She ran to the fluffy bed and started jumping and laughing, sighing happily as her weight sinks into the mattress when she got tired.

Life could be grand.

Following Maxwell’s general guidelines about tonight’s event, Riley went down to the seamstress, as in to prepare one of her gowns for the evening, as well as getting herself a mask.

She seems to have chosen a bad moment, as she barged in and a girl was in the nude, changing.

“Oh, God!” Riley exclaimed. “I’m so sorry!”

As Riley turned her back to give some modesty to the girl, she replied: “No problem. To be honest, I didn’t have an appointment. I’m Hana, Hana Lee.”

The black-haired smiled, not that the Asian could see. “I’m Riley Flowers, the girl who’s being sponsored by the Beaumont’s. It’s very nice to meet you!”

“Likewise.” She breathed out. “I suppose you’re also here to prepare for the Masquerade tonight. Assuming you’re here with me now, and not already dressed, I must assume you’re, like me, searching desperately for something to wear.”

Desperate may be the word to put it, considering the current minimalist getup the tanned girl had.

“More or less.” Riley said, neutral. “I’m here to touch up one of my dresses.”

“The seamstress is running late, but I can show you around!”

As Riley turned around, she saw Hana struggling to zip up completely. Helping up her finish, Hana says: “Thank you. Not many girls around are like you.”

“As in helpful?”

“Nice”

As she looks what Riley has in the bag, she exclaims she has the perfect mask to go with it. As she slips it in, she asks Hana: “How do I look?”

“Divine!”

“I don’t understand!” The young girl of seven complains. “Why do I have to come to this stupid party?”

“Well, Dora, that’s just how father is.” Her sister says, while her teenaged fingers arranges the girl’s little, white dress. “You eventually learn to suck it up and go with his evil, mastermind plans, which usually involve us being shown like broodmares.”

Theodora pouted. “But it’s so boring!”

“And it doesn’t get better.” The other girl said. “Why do you think everybody’s drunk by the end of the night?”

The blonde girl giggled.

“Do you know what you must do?” The elder sister checked.

“Enter hand-in-hand with father, give him the rose,” She motioned the flower on her hand. “Dance the first waltz with him, bow and leave.”

The teen smirked. “Perfect. Fortunately for you, no-one will miss you if you find the servant’s girl and scurries off to the gardens. Just avoid tearing your dress, okay?”

“Okay…” Dora deadpanned.

The sister took her hand and walked her over the entrance of the ballroom, where the rest of their family congregated. Her father noticed their arrival, and, dismissing her elder daughter, he kneels to talk to his youngest.

“Are you ready, Dora?”

“Yes, father.” She responded, dutifully, if rather dull.

The man’s lips thinned. “Dora, I know you’d prefer to be doing just about anything else right now, but this is important to us. Can you be a good girl tonight?”

Her eyes were locked to the ground, she did not want her father’s sapphire blue eyes piercing her ones.

“Dora?” He asks, pointedly.

Finally, she nods.

The parent smiles at his daughter, hugging her and kissing her forehead. “Good. Now, let us make this family proud.”

He took her small hand in his and they entered the ballroom with their chins up.

Palace of the Brigades, Avlona, Cordonia, Fall 2015

As they go into the ballroom, the herald announces her as “Lady Riley Flowers of New York”. She admits it does have a ring to it.

Alone and rather lost, she goes to the first familiar face she finds. Drake. Sadly, it lacks in friendliness.

“Good evening, my lady.” He says.

“So you do have manners!” Riley replies.

“Riley?!” He seems astounded. “Is that you?”

“Of course.” She twirls her off-white dress. “Who else?”

“I… I was caught off-guard!” He defends, lamely. “You clean up well.”

“I’m torn.” Riley says with a pointed look. “I can’t decide if you’re being nice or a douche again. Since I’m happy to be here, I’ll take it as a compliment.”

He chose that moment to feel self-conscious. “Looking the part doesn’t mean you’re going to be welcome here, you know?”

“Classy, Drake.”

“Compared to most nobles here, I’m your best friend.” He said, forcefully.

“I know.”

“That’s the first smart thing you’ve said.”

She frowns, but chose to ignore the last part. “What I meant is that I know I’m at a snakes’ nest, that doesn’t mean I can’t have fun.”

He sighs. “Look, I’m not trying to be a jerk. I’m just trying to help.”

Half humored, half angered, she says: “You have a very particular way of helping.”

“I’m just saying what I wish someone would have said me a long time ago.”

“Is it, Drake?” She raises an eyebrow. “Is it all there is to it?”

For a second, he seems conflicted, but soon excuses himself to the bar. As he went away, he says: “Good luck, Riley. You’re gonna need it.”

Vienna, Early 2006

Linda Rosa was sipping her coffee, twirling her flaming red hair, looking at the nothing.

“You should be more careful. You’ll end up mugged.” A deep voice rung on her ears.

“I’ve been mugged already, but I don’t carry anything of value aside from my paintings, and I suppose I should be flattered if someone thinks they’re valuable enough to be stolen.”

Drake was unsure whether to be angered or amused by her antics. “I don’t even know what to respond to that.”

She smiled, daring. “You could give me a kiss and say that you love me.”

He smirked. He took her cheek and kissed her passionately, slightly unsuitable for public company, such as they were at a coffeeshop.

“I love you, you know?” Drake told her.

“Yeah, I do, and I love you too.” She smiled, melancholic.

“Why are you so down?”

“Oh, it’s nothing, I’ve just had yet another row with my father.”

“About?”

“Oh, same old, same old. My college major, my clothes, my hair. Teenage rebellion, he says.” She sighed. “Hey, Drake?”

“Yes?”

“What do you think about noble people?”

He choked on his coffee. “What?”

“You know, blue blood, aristocracy, monarchy, privilege, this kind of thing.”

“Why are you asking about that?!”

“While I was rowing with my father, I thought he’d like to ship me off and marry to some well-to-do man, like he’s some kind of blue-blood of the seventeenth century. I just wondered about your opinion of them. You come from a monarchical country, don’t you?”

“Yeah, Cordonia’s a monarchy.”

“Perhaps you would agree with my dad, or think it was cool to have this thing around, at this day and age.” She wondered, with her expression empty. Soon enough, however, it was like her spirit settled itself back into her body. “What do you think about them?” Her eyes drilled him, anxious for an answer.

Drake couldn’t hold eye contact. “For me, they look pretentious and self-serving, but I don’t know, I’ve never met any.”

She turned thoughtful for a moment. “You’re probably right, I guess. Hey, let’s go to the park! I want to walk around, feel the sun!”

“No, it’s too cold.” Drake complained.

“Come on, mister grouchy! I’ll warm you up!”

He tried to keep his neutral face, but the sight of his girlfriend’s smile cracked him up. “Fine. Let’s go.”

She took his arms and they went out the door.

Red Rose - Masterlist

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[campcamp-theories]

Camp Is Out - Camp Draws to a Close

Chapter 1

 When David announced Parents Day, Max could only scoff at the idea. His parents were living their shitty lives, faces stuck in their shitty computers, not giving a shit if he existed or not. They were workaholics to the extreme.

 His parents were both lawyers who spent more time dealing with clients, filing documents or organizing office space to even have time to care for him. For as long as he could remember, he had to take care of himself. That included cooking, cleaning, overall hygiene; hell even studying he would do in his off time and he sure had a lot of that. The most his parents had ever done was register him for schooling… that and give him Mr. Honeynuts on his 7th birthday. At the time he had complained he was too old for the teddy bear, but it later became his only sense of comfort and security. As for school, he was lucky the bus stop was just down the street from his place because for a preschooler to be out walking alone was dangerous, not that he would know anything about that being a kid and all. It’s not like he’d been nearly kidnapped a time or two and it’s not like his parents would care either, except maybe to avoid a lawsuit or some shit.

“Well you losers enjoy your family bonding because there’s no way my folks are coming. Guess I get to kick back and relax. Maybe I’ll just order a pizza…” Max withdrew David’s phone from his hoodie, a gadget he’d secured from his counselor on multiple occasions. The idiot never even noticed most of the time, being too caught up in trying to teach all the campers to appreciate nature and whatever the fuck else crossed the dipshits head.    

 He could see the beginnings of recognition cross David’s thoughts before he was interjected by the founder of the camp, Cameron Campbell making an untimely appearance, like always.

 Max could care less as he tried picking up a signal to browse the web. When Cameron started wildly thrashing David around, he looked up with interest, and smirked behind the screen to hide his amusement. That enjoyment was short lived as the bus carrying the parents pulled up. His expression drooped into a deep frown as the riders exited the vehicle and were escorted inside the mess hall. He lagged behind a bit, watching the children find their respective families. Taking a seat at the table, he observed from the side lines, finding things about each campers parent to pick apart for his own personal satisfaction.

 It didn’t take long for questions to arise as parents started to take notice to something not quite right with the other children and the camp as a whole. Eventually voices were raising with question after question, with which the founder tried calming the visitors down by trying to explain that they hadn’t been tricked or swindled. He declared the camp provided all activities that their children had been signed up for.

‘Oh this will be good…’ Max pocketed the phone to see how things played out. Perhaps today wouldn’t be all bad.  

“Everyone outside! It’s time to show off Camp Campbell camptivities.” Everyone gathered towards the back door, piling out to explore more of the camp.

“Have fuuuun…” Sitting back on the bench, Max folded his arms behind his head with a smug smirk.

“Oooh no you don’t!” Cameron snagged the back of Max’s hoodie, much to his disdain and dropped him off at David’s feet. “This Parent’s Day needs to go off without a hitch and that means good times and happy families!” To follow up his comment, he shoved Gwen back into David and Max.

“WHAT!?” Max shrieked in disbelief.

“Until this one’s actual parents get here, you three are going to be the perfect nuclear family. GOT IT!” With a pointed jab at them, to further get his point across, he stormed away to try and save his image before it was damaged beyond repair.

 Max could already feel dread weighing down on him. A slight vibration from behind drew his attention only to look up to find David practically vibrating in place. Before he had time to question or act, he was scooped up into a tight hug. “We are going to have so much fun, family!” Max grit his teeth together, thoughts raging with malice.

 David carried him over to the door before setting him down on the ground in a hurry to follow his idol. As soon as his feet touched down, he hastily backed away from David and watched him with murderous eyes.

“Why did I have to go along with David’s idea…” Gwen muttered after him.

 Stuffing his hands into his hoodie pocket, Max gave a huff of indignation. Today was going to be a looooong day.

 As he followed along behind David and Mr. Campbell, he kept his mask of indifference in check, trying to ignore the sting of jealously that tried to rear its ugly head as each child showed off their camp camp activities with their parents.

 He was only half paying attention to what was being said as his eyes roamed the crowd. Eventually his interest landed on Space Kid who was alone at the moment. Perfect. Someone he could take out his frustration on. Slipping away from his “family,” he walked over nonchalantly, feigning interest.

“So what are you up to?” His eyes scoured the contents strewn about the ground around the cardboard rocket ship, finding a box of matches and a few sticks of firecrackers. Squatting down, he picked up the firecrackers and box while Space Kid answered his question.

“Oh howdy do Max! I am working on finishing my rocket ship.”

 He hummed in reply while he inserted three firecrackers inside the front cone adorning the cheaply made replica.

“So Space Kid, can’t help but notice I haven’t seen any grownups walking around with fish bowls on their heads.” Pulling out a match, he swiped it along the side of the box, trying to ignite the sticks as he talked.

“Oh my parents couldn’t make it.”

“Oh really…. That sucks.” He looked down at his fellow camper, feeling a twinge of familiarity.

“Yea… but my uncle came instead. He’s the coolest guy in the galaxy.”

“Oh. Really.” Happy moment gone.

“Yep! Say, could you hand me that Hydraulic monkey wrench.” Ignoring the question, Max threw the match box away and kicked the peg out from under the rocket ship, causing the contraption to fall on top of Space Kid with little regard for his wellbeing.

 For a moment he felt like he had someone he could connect with, but that was just a fluke and it ruined his mood for sabotaging their project. Stuffing his hands in his pockets, he walked away with his head bowed only to knock into David’s knees. Stumbling backwards, he glanced up to see a very unhappy David and Gwen. Just great…

 He heard David ranting about how he and Gwen were disappointed in him, even going so far as to call themselves his parents. Max just rolled his eyes, not entirely listening and looked over at Gwen.

“Okay, you are definitely taking this dumb parenting role to seriously. Am I right Gwen?” He looked up at the other counselor, expecting her to take his side of the argument but instead she folded her arms and agreed with David.

“Nah, for real Max, look at what you did to Space Kid.” Max glanced over just in time to see Space Kid’s uncle hurry over and lift the rocket off his grandkid.

 Gwen and David gawked as realization dawned on them. “Buzz Aldrin!?” They blurted out in synch. Max followed after them as they went up to greet the X-astronaut. It was entertaining watching the pair struggle with the fact that they were meeting the real Buzz Aldrin after having just sent fake footage of Space Kid, otherwise known as Neil now, walking on the moon to his family. A satisfied sneer spread across Max’s face as he watched the man chew the pair out. Gwen tried salvaging the situation by fumbling some half assed excuse.

“You’re lucky I’d never hit a woman. There’s no greater crime than faking a moon landing.” The man grumbled out in his lecturing tone.

“David helped too!” Max pointed at David for emphasis, “Max!” David put his hands on his hips with a disappointed frown before he was personally introduced to Aldrin’s fist.

“Thanks for speaking up son.”

 Max blinked a couple times in surprise before a shit eating grin spread across his face. “It’s an honor sir.” He mock saluted the astronaut, feeling a strong sense of satisfaction.

…….

 The remainder of the day followed relatively similarly. He’d cause trouble to fill the languid times, get lectured and start over again. When night time rolled around, the camp gathered together to put on a stage play of sorts to give the children a chance to display everything they’d learned or were practicing at the camp.

 Meanwhile, David was trying to coax Max into performing together. His idol was counting on him to put on a good show and he would do anything to meet his expectations. When he tried asking Max about his enrollment, he dodged the bullet by drawing the counselors’ attention to the other campers. He watched each play with desperation, hoping one of the other kids would fuck things up for him, but to his dismay and horror, things were progressing smoothing.

 Gwen went off to find his paper work, while Max grabbed fists full of his hair, tugging on the roots painfully as his anxiety rose. He didn’t want to be here… he didn’t want to be here… HE DIDN’T WANT TO BE HERE! Max took deep breaths with his fists clenching and unclenching. David’s normal optimistic behavior was usually just annoying but this time it was downright driving him hysterical. David was being really insensitive, not that he was aware. Max made sure he let nothing slip about his family or interests for the entire length of the camp. He had his reasons for keeping to himself; mainly because it was easier to bury his problems then face them head on and get swallowed up in emotion.

 By the time Gwen returned, David was stretched thin with distress. His counselor was counting on him, Max was being uncooperative and he had no idea what they could present to the other families. When Gwen announced she found Max’s papers, he sighed in relief and hastily walked over. “Great, then we can do this!”

“I don’t want to do this!” Max threw his hands up into the air exasperated. What part did they not understand?

“Max, that is IT!” David stepped over towards Max with full on aggressive, finally snapping under all the stress. “I am feed up with your bad attitude! Why do you always have to bring everyone else down instead of trying just a little bit to have fun?”

 Gwen hastily interjected, holding the files up for David to see. “David…” She started but was cut off as he snagged the folders from her and held it up in front of him. “Now let us all put on a happy face, go out there and show everyone just how great you are at…” he trailed off when his eyes finally took in the documents inside the folder. They were…. practically blank. The only things written were Max’s name and age.  

“I told you, they didn’t care.” He could feel the beginnings of moisture gathering, so he tried smoldering the feeling with bitterness, but when David’s shocked expression came into view through his peripheral, the flood gates cracked a bit, brimming his eyes with tears.

“Just make something up so that we can get this over with.” He hastily brushed off the tears using his shoulder and walked away with slumped shoulders. He couldn’t stand the looks of pity the counselors were shooting him. This was exactly why he didn’t want them to know anything. Finding a spot in a shaded corner, he sat down, drew his knees up to his chest and hugged them tightly to his body. Don’t think about it. He tried blocking it out, but it was already too late and more tears welled up in his sockets. Sniffling, he ducked his head down, trying to hide the fact that he was crying. For a moment, he was granted privacy to work through his emotions and by the time David tentatively walked over, he’d calmed down enough to stand up and dust off, acting like his breakdown never happened.

“Well lets….”

“Let’s get out of here.” David cut Max off, catching him off guard. Brow furrowing in confusion, Max looked up confused. “What?” Gwen and David shared a look before nodding their head towards the exit and started to walk out. He stared after them dumbfounded until Gwen paused to call after him.

“You coming?” Shaking off his stupor, he hurried after them confused. Wordlessly, they lead him to the Camp Campbell employee car and they all shuffled inside. Under normal circumstances, this would be very incriminating but he was so far out of his element that he just went along with it. Staring out of the window, he watched the trees blur past until they pulled off the dirt trail onto the highway leading towards town. His nerves went on high alert wanting to ask but fretting the answer until the car came to a halt. Shifting in his seat, he glanced outside to see neon lights that read Sleepy Peak Pizza Bros.

 The silence persisted as Gwen took the lead up to the store front. David followed shortly after, with Max at their heels, staring on with even more burning questions.

 While David and Max took a seat at a booth, Gwen went up to the counter to order. The pair sat across from each other and he fidgeted nervously when the two counselors shared another knowing look. Unable to take it anymore, Max broke the silence, “why are we hear? What about Campbell’s big show?”

“It’s stupid.” The uncharacteric dismissal of a camp activity, from David no less made Max reel back in his seat. “What?”

“You were right. It’s stupid. You shouldn’t have to pretend for anyone.”

“Are you… okay?” The question was full of his consternation as he placed his hands on the table in front of him.

“I’m… sorry… Max…” David rested his head on his hand, looking out the window with a pang of sadness.

“I tried to always see the good in things, and I tried to get others to see the same but…” Max gapped openly. Was this really David? “Pretending things are okay when they’re not doesn’t help anything.” Clicking his jaw shut, he swallowed thickly. “I’m sorry your parents don’t care enough Max. You have every right to be angry. But you deserve to be happy. And I hope you can find that here at camp. Even if it’s not today.”

 For the first time ever, Max felt understood. It was foreign and unusual, which left him speechless on how to respond.

 Thankfully he didn’t have to. Gwen returned with pizza in hand. “Life sucks sometimes, but at least there’s pizza.”

 He silently watched her settle down until she noticed he was only staring. “Well don’t just look at it, eat up you little shit.” The warmth in her words brought a soft smile to his face. Without having to be told twice, he filled a plate. Shortly after, the two counselors followed suit.

 The day had started out shitty, from the random arrival of the parents, to having to deal with David’s obnoxious cheeriness, watching families have what he could never and then having his emotions on edge all day, but by the end of the evening, he couldn’t be happier. He was starting to think maybe, just maybe… David wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows, and perhaps… he wasn’t all that bad….

“I’ll go make sure the car starts.” Gwen flipped up the car keys, snatched them out of the air and walked away, leaving David and Max alone on the sidewalk. Kicking at the ground in thought, Max looked up at David nervously.

“David…”

“Mhm…” His counselor stared back down to meet his stare, only to be greeted by a surprise hug around the legs. The small arms curled around him quickly, releasing just as quickly and hastily retreating, but that short moment brought a warmth through David’s chest. For the first time, he’d reached a chord with Max and that was something he would forever hold dear.  

“That never happened!” Max demanded, jabbing his finger David’s way with a strained tone.

“Okay Max.” David smiled down fondly. He would respect his camper’s wishes, especially if it meant he could finally start breaking through that thick ice the kid had trapped himself inside.

 Max’s eye twitched at the casual consent his counselor provided. “Seriously, I will murder you if this gets back to the gang!”

 Before he could receive any more confirmation, Gwen pulled up with the car. “Do you think everything went okay back at the camp?”

“Oh I’m sure it’s nothing Mr. Campbell couldn’t handle.” David responded confidently.

Chapter 2

[cdg174]

Just another Babysitter: Part 3

Summary: As Y/N attempts to adjust from coming back from the dead, the angels are stirring and this doesn’t fall silent on Castiel’s ears. The Winchester brothers and their best angel friend leave the bunker to discover who had been brought back in Cottonwood falls. When they get there Dean grows angry and Sam is upset. What will they do when they reunite with someone they never thought they would see again? How will Y/N survive in a world that is not hers? Let’s find out.

Words: 1677

  Masterlist

The Bunker Lebanon, Kansas: Saturday June 24th, 2017

General pov.

All is calm in the bunker, Sam is tucked away in his room reading a book, Dean is in the kitchen lurking for food and Castiel is examining through the shelves in the library. Everything is quite as he takes a book from one shelf, just at random, to read possibly. The two men and the angel haven’t had much to do in a few weeks, they’ve had no hunts and no calls for help. Maybe one or two messages from Jody and Donna to ask how they’ve been but aside from that, nothing. However the silence doesn’t last for long, not in a hunters life.

All of a sudden, a piercing whistle sounds in Castiel’s ears. He grabs his head in shocking pain, it subsides as soon as it came though. Castiel knows exactly what the screeching means, the last time he experienced anything like that, the Winchester’s half brother Adam was resurrected. This one is more painful than the last which is to indicate whoever was revived is closer in perimeter. Before Castiel loses the location, he grabs a marker off the library table and marches into the war room.

“Sam! Dean!” Castiel’s yell echos down the halls to the two hunters ears. They immediately stand at attention at the broken calm of the bunker. Dean pulls his pistol from his belt, closes the fridge and bolts toward the library, Sam not far behind him with a blade clenched in his fist. When they reach the source of the call, Castiel hears their stomping feet. “In here!” They step into the war room, faces confused when they see no threat.

“Is there a reason you gave me a heart attack?” Castiel turns from the map to look at Dean. 

“You haven’t suffered any heart problems.” Dean wipes his hand down his face in response and Sam smirks behind him.

“Nevermind Cas. What were you calling about?” Sam interjects.

“This is why.” Castiel walks to the map on the wall and points to the red dot he made. Sam and Dean make their way over.

“A dot is why you were yelling in panic?” Dean say skeptically. “That red dot must be a big deal.” Castiel rolls his eyes at Dean.

“Not the dot, the location it is placed.” Sam motions for him to continue. “Angels are speaking again. A soul has escaped Heaven and that red dot is where this person has come back to life.” The boys look at each other and then they both take a closer look at the map.

“Cottonwood Fall, Kansas?” Dean reads in recognition.

“You know it?” Castiel asks.

“We both do.” The younger Winchester answers. “It was home once but that was over thirty years ago.” Castiel and Sam look to Dean as he pivots toward the library. He shouts over his shoulder.

“We leave in twenty minutes.” 

When Dean reaches his room, instead of going straight to his duffel bag, he goes to the trunk full of his family’s photos and such. Once opened, Dean shuffles through its contents and within a few seconds, he finds it. The ring Y/N gave him all those years ago. 

“A home you can come back to if need be.”

Meanwhile Sam is stuffing clothes into into a knapsack in his room. He grabs his laptop next and gently places it in its case at his desk. When he grazes his room for anything he missed, he spots John’s journal on his nightstand. Picking it up Sam goes to the page with the shoelace peeking out the top. The same page John wrote about Y/N’s death on it. Slung through the lace is the petal pink ring Dean gave him from Y/N, when he was five. The ring was still too big for his little fingers, so he had taken a shoelace off one of Dean’s shoes and wore as a necklace.

Sam takes the shoelace and packs the journal with his laptop. Seconds later he hears Dean call his name from down the hall. Time to go. Still holding the lace, he shifts his bag on his shoulder and picks up his laptop. One handed, Sam slides the necklace over his head and tucks the ring into his shirt with a smile on his face.

Cottonwood Falls, Kansas

Y/N’s pov.

“Here you go.” Gwen places a sandwich in front of me, along with a glass of apple juice. “All I had was peanut butter and strawberry jam.” After I was invited in, Gwen grabbed me some clean clothes and helped me start a shower. It felt like a weight was taken off my shoulder as I watched all the dirt and grime wash down the drain. After the shower I stood in shock looking in the mirror, seeing for the first time a hand print burned into the lower left side of my abdomen. How I didn’t notice or feel it sooner, I have no idea. 

However long later, I walked out of then bathroom in new clean clothes, the old ones tossed in the trash and bandaged knuckles. Gwen then gave me her house phone and the number to call a tow for my ‘car’. Now here I am seated in the kitchen, staring at food she insisted I eat before I go on my way.

“Thanks.” I look around her small kitchen, plain white cupboards, a round tan table in which I sit at and sun shinning through the window above the sink.

“If you need anything, I’ll just be in the living room.” I nod as Gwen walks out the doorway. I pick up the sandwich, ready to demolish the thing when I see a calendar to my left, pinned to the wall. It’s placed on the  month of June but what startles me is the year. 2017.

“Oh God!” I whisper scream. “I’ve been dead for thirty-three years.” I hold my head between my hands, about ready to cry when Gwen comes back into the kitchen. She opens a drawer beside the sink and places a stack of dish towels in it. When she turns around I straighten my back and grab the sandwich, putting on the best smile I can. Gwen smiles in return and proceeds back to the living room, without a word. I slump my shoulders. “What the hell do I do now?”

As shocked as I am, my stomach is hungrier and so I eat.

General pov.

“This is definitely the place.” Dean says as he puts the impala in park. Castiel had directed the eldest Winchester to the site where the recent rising took place. Sam is first out of the vehicle and he stares in awe at all his flattened surroundings. Trees snapped down, hedges as low as the grass and old supports of a house, splintered to nothing. Just like when Dean came back. The two men and the angel look at each before they separate.

As Castiel and Dean explore the old building’s ruins, they hear Sam beckon them from a distance. When Dean spots the graves, he already feels dread for what he has not yet seen. From the dishevelled look of Sam and the dug up ground, the eldest Winchester knows he won’t like what comes next. They reach the headstones and Sam looks to Dean with concerned eyes. One says the name of someone they boys have never met and the other is of a person they hoped they would see again, just not in this way.

Here lies Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N Beloved friend, niece and a sister to many. May she fly in the heavens for all eternity. Born August 12th, 1965 - Died June 24th, 1984 

Of course the dirt is dug up around Y/N’s headstone which makes Dean angry and so he walks away. 

“You two knew her?” Castiel asks Sam already knowing the answer. 

“Yeah.” Sam rubs at his tired eyes. “She was the last real babysitter we ever had after mom died.” Castiel looks down at the dirt pile wanting to ask more about this Y/N but the angels knows it’s best if he doesn’t. Whoever she was to the Winchester’s was someone they grew to love, he can see that much in Sam’s expression.

“You’ve already guessed that she is the escaped soul.” Sam only nods at Castiel’s statement and he begins to walk the direction Dean went. Over his shoulder, Sam indicates to the angel.

“We’ve got a dead babysitter to track down.”

Y/N’s pov. 

As I am about to leave Gwen’s home, I stop by the mirror just by the front door to take in my new clothes. The plain pink tank top I wear is covered by an overly baggy grey pull over sweater and the faded logo says something along the lines of ‘Disney Resort’. Aside from the new tops, I’m sporting some tight fitting blue jeans with scuffs here and there, as well as some bouncy black slip on shoes. Overall a very comfy outfit but I can’t help but feel completely out of place. I guess being dead for over three decades will do that to a person.

“Here you go. One more thing for your troubles.” Gwen startles me out of my head as she holds out an old pink knapsack, seemingly full of things. I look up from the bag confused and Gwen smiles sadly at me. “I know a runaway when I see one dear.Your bandaged knuckles give you away.” I can’t really deny her claim as that is exactly what I have to do now. I only had Auntie Terry before and if she is still alive she would be in her seventies now. I’ve been dead far too long that I could possibly give her a heart attack if she all of a sudden saw her dead niece. “I won’t convince you too stay but the least I can do is give you some things to help you survive a little while.”

“Thank you.” I reach for the door knob and march scared into a new world I never got to grow up in.

Special mentions: @palominojacoby

Call me Jane Doe mentions: @arazialotis @cyanpintglass @goldenolaf25 @when-innocence-is-gone @jaylynnaredsky @fallen-castiel @spnfanficfavorites@anothertimeinspace @klleexy @flare-chan003 @isnt-the-blog-youre-looking-for @imnotalosechester @mary-meee @yascalum @jsamstar@driadgoch @vvinch3st3r @kayarisa@misguidedconqueress @heeeeeether @messy-buns-and-shotguns @breathexxinxxthexxflames @ryantherandomhero @simirachel@supernatural-fangirl13 @lilypalmer1987 @beatlesobsessionlove @ultracleverthing @possesstiel

[salaz-bryana]

Exclusive Interview: Pop-Culturalist Chats with Team Kaylie’s Bryana Salaz Bryana Salaz is one of the breakout stars of 2019. She’s playing the title character in the comedic family series Team Kaylie, which follows a celebrity influencer who must complete a year of community service after having a run-in with the law. Throughout the first season, we see Kaylie transform in front of our eyes, and it’s Bryana’s multifaceted performance that brings it to life. Pop-Culturalist caught up with Bryana to chat all things Team Kaylie. P-C: Tell us about Team Kaylie, your character, and what drew you to this project. Bryana: Team Kaylie is about a celebrity/influencer-type who gets in trouble with the law and in exchange has to do a year of community service. Her community service is taking care of this after-school program for kids in East L.A., which is part of the town that’s not the best or the safest. It basically follows a girl who’s put in this new position where she has to learn about life. She learns so much from these kids who are only twelve or thirteen years old. It’s a really special show. P-C: How did you prepare to tackle Kaylie’s transformation? Bryana: In the beginning, Kaylie is so different from who I am. So, it was really fun to tap into my really girly side and go into hair and makeup, get those extensions, the lashes, the cool clothes, all the things I didn’t have growing up because that wasn’t my life. At first, I thought it wasn’t going to be easy for me or it was going to be hard to relate to the character because of who she is, but I think the best part about transforming into Kaylie was bringing elements of myself into Kaylie so that she didn’t come off as someone people didn’t like or someone that people would expect her to be. It was really important for me to tap into that side. The character development between the first episode and the last episode for Kaylie is so special. P-C: Was there any pressure being the lead of the series? What was the biggest takeaway from this process? Bryana: There was definitely a lot of pressure being the lead of the series. It’s still so weird for me to say because I never thought I’d be in that position. I think the best part about our show is that we’re a big family. We had so many great moments. For me, I think the main pressure was making sure we had a great, loving, and safe environment for all the kids. They’re growing up in front of millions of people. I wanted to make sure they didn’t feel the pressure and had a safe environment to grow in. I took that on because I genuinely care about all the kids and I care about everybody on our set. P-C: With your character at the heart of the story, which of her relationships was your favorite to explore and why?
 Bryana: Oh gosh! I’ve never been asked that one before. It’s such a hard question. I genuinely feel like in each episode, Kaylie has a moment with each kid. There’s a different episode for each kid. They not only learn from Kaylie, but she also learns from them. I think that’s what makes Kaylie so special. By the end of the show, she’s not the same Kaylie. She has a piece of each kid in her, and she has a piece that they’ve taught her. She’s growing through them. So I think her relationship with each child is very special and unique in its own way. That’s what I love about our show. I think it gives a lot of light to a lot of topics that a lot of kids don’t really talk about. I feel really, really empowered to be a part of those messages and to be a part of that conversation. P-C: You’re an actress and singer. How did you discover your passion for the arts? Is there one that you naturally gravitate towards? 
Bryana: I get asked that a lot, and genuinely I’ve never been able to pick one. I feel incredibly lucky to have had the opportunities I’ve had in both music and acting. I hope that never stops. Even with Team Kaylie, I was able to sing on our show. I sing our theme song. There’s an episode where there is a music video, and I always feel like it’s going to be intertwined, and I’m so passionate about both that if I had to choose, I would go crazy. I’m super, super blessed to be a part of both. I got started because my mom signed me up for a local singing competition for military kids in Hawaii. I’d never done anything music-related before, and so I was terrified. The second that I stepped onto stage, I realized that this is what I’m meant to do. Even though I was only twelve years old, I knew in my little heart. I kept going for it, and thank God I did because I never in a million years thought I’d be sitting here talking about myself. P-C: You also competed on The Voice. What did you learn from that experience that you’ve been able to apply to your career moving forward? Bryana: The biggest thing I’ve learned on The Voice, as cliché as it sounds, was to never give up. I was only seventeen-years-old at the time. After being eliminated, it would have been easy for me to be discouraged and feel like I’m never going to make it or that I wasn’t good enough. It’s very easy to get in your head. I thank God that I had a strong support system and I had Gwen, my coach, send me really encouraging messages. If I would’ve let that discourage me, I would never have made it out of Illinois. I’m always preaching that message and will always say to keep going no matter what. P-C: You’ve had a lot of success already in your young career. When you look back, is there a particular moment that sticks out to you? Bryana: Honestly, anytime that I get the phone call that I booked something. I don’t think there’s anything that will ever top that. It’s an indescribable feeling. I don’t think there’s been a time where I got the phone call where I was in a normal setting. I’m always in public, and I always end up bursting into tears in public, every single time! It’s almost like that pat on your back: “Hey kid, you did it. Keep going.” P-C: Where were you when you learned you landed Team Kaylie? Bryana: I just finished working out. I looked horrible. I was with my two girlfriends, and we were in Walmart getting some stuff. I was carrying our giant pack of water bottles, and I got a phone call from a number that I’d never seen before. I normally never answer phone calls like that, but something was telling me to answer it. I was literally in the middle of Walmart, and it was the executive and creator of Team Kaylie on the phone. They were like, “Hey, it’s us!” My heart was racing. I knew it was down to me and one other person. So I was either getting the first phone call that I booked it or the second phone call that they had gone with someone else. I was terrified. After them beating around the bush for a minute, they were finally like, “You’re our Kaylie.” I dropped the water bottles everywhere, and they exploded! I started crying in the middle of Walmart, and it was so bad. But it was such a special moment, and I’m so happy my friends were with me. Pop-Culturalist Speed Round P-C: Guilty pleasure TV show? Bryana: The Bachelorette P-C: Guilty pleasure movie? Bryana: Superbad P-C: Favorite book? Bryana: The Fallen series P-C: Favorite play or musical? Bryana: Wicked P-C: A band or artist that fans would be surprised to learn is on your playlist? Bryana: Sleeping With Sirens P-C: Last show you binge-watched? Bryana: Stranger Things P-C: Hidden talent? Bryana: I can fart with my hands and turn my arm a full 360 degrees. To keep up with Bryana, follow her on Twitter and Instagram. Binge-watch the first season of Team Kaylie on Netflix today. http://pop-culturalist.com/exclusive-interview-pop-culturalist-chats-with-team-kaylies-bryana-salaz/

[roselesliesource]

As Gwen Dawson—the youngest house maid at “Downton Abbey”—she secretly dreamed of escaping a life of service, and becoming a secretary (in the show’s very first season). In a memorable season six cameo, she returned to visit England’s best known stately home, as the wife of a rising politician, an eloquent feminist, and an ardent advocate for the education of women. In “Game of Thrones” she was the raven-haired wilding archer Ygritte, for whom Jon Snow broke his Night’s Watch vow of chastity—kindling an impossible passion that both characters would deny, even to themselves, until she died in his arms (toward the end of Season 4), while the wilding armies lay siege to the Wall and Castle Black, telling Snow one last time (with a broad Lancashire accent) that he “know[s] nothing.” As for the fate and fortunes of Rose Leslie’s latest character, Maia Rindell—a recent law school graduate (from a prominent and enormously wealthy Chicago family, who’s secured a job offer at the law firm of her godmother, Diane Lockhart)—this may depend less on Leslie— or her versatile gifts as an actress, or even on the storytelling skills of Robert and Michelle King in creating an absorbing sequel to their long-running CBS hit series “The Good Wife,” and rather more on the venerable broadcast channel’s marketing bet that it can launch its new subscription streaming service “All Access” by luring the old show’s loyal audience (of 10-13 million regular viewers over seven seasons) back to the colorful political and legal world of Alicia Florrick (played by Julianna Margulies, who won three Emmys and was nominated for seven more in the role), but without Margulies’ beloved character ever actually turning up in the sequel. MONROWE recently caught up with Rose Leslie by phone, shortly after her return home to London following some five months living and shooting the first season of “The Good Fight” in Brooklyn, New York. Guy Lesser: So, is Julianna Margulies going to be lured into appearing in Season 2 of “The Good Fight” when you all come back to shoot next fall? Rose Leslie: I don’t believe so. I don’t believe so. No—but, as a mere actor, that’s not something I would ever be privy to. Were you wanting to see Juliana appear? Not necessarily. But when a character like Alicia doesn’t die, with, say— An arrow through the heart? There’s no closure to her storyline, and of course Alicia does periodically receive mention in “The Good Fight.” True, true. But I loved the way they ended “The Good Wife” and left the door open— even if there isn’t any way that that she’s going to come through it. But it also reflects life, when, you know, you’re not too sure whether you are going to see an old friend again. Were you a fan of the “The Good Wife” or was it Maia’s character that convinced you to take the part? I was completely drawn into the world that the Kings created in “The Good Wife,” and I felt completely honored to be asked to be part of that. But it was the writing that really got me. I feel that they are such bold writers, and such advocates for women, and as a result, I greatly admire their work. I knew this was something I would love to be part of—particularly when it came to Maia, and the opportunity to explore in depth one character through the arc of however many episodes. She wasn’t someone—despite the privilege she was brought up with—who felt entitled or was arrogant. She realized that she had to work incredibly hard to prove her worth to her peers and others. And I rather loved her backbone and her resilience. And certainly with everything that is thrown at her through the season. You see her flaws, but you also see that she’s passionate, and dedicated to the cause of fighting injustice, and I love the core of self-belief she has. Did you discuss Maia with the Kings? They asked me to read the pilot and to come back to them—to see what I thought, and whether I was a fan of this particular genre, and this particular universe, and the character. I really loved the pilot. And they were very open to discussion in terms of letting me know what the character’s arc would be in the first season, and helping me be aware of where the character was going to go. In some ways, she seems so different from other characters you’ve played. Obviously, I’ve had to be prepared to play all kinds of women. But I always find myself being drawn to playing characters who are forced to get out of their comfort zones. Hopefully that keeps it interesting for the audience, but certainly for me—along with the development within the character—it keeps it interesting. The fictional Rindell family is very clearly modeled on Bernie Madoff’s, with many of the same questions posed about who knew what, when, and who was blissfully ignorant about the family’s and Madoff’s investment fund’s extraordinary good fortune—particularly before the scandal broke. What sort of preparation was involved for playing someone who’s American, a lawyer, and the daughter of this sort of family? I had played a couple of American characters before, so I felt at ease with the accent, although I’d never approached a project where I was talking in American for nearly five and an a half months. I listened to voices on Youtube and American TV so it would come across as naturally as possible. But I was also surrounded by Americans on set— so if I wasn’t too sure about how to pronounce a particular word, I could just ask anyone. With Maia Rindell, I didn’t necessarily check out the bar exam—was that terrible of me? But I did do some research when it came to Ponzi schemes, and I read Stephanie Madoff Mack’s autobiography, “The End of Normal.” And of course that was her take on being married to Mark Madoff, and what they were thinking, and the horrific consequences after Bernie Madoff confessed. It seems just extraordinary, crazy in a way, that his surname was “made-off.” I actually went to a minor English boarding school, called “Mill Hill,” that is sometimes confused with your boarding school, Millfield—both because of its name, and for its prowess at team sports. Of course, not only did I not fit in, but even after two years of playing them, I’m still far from sure I understand either cricket or rugby. Cricket is still something I cannot wrap my head around. I’m lost halfway through the explanation. And I still don’t get it—not that I’m proud of that—I should understand how cricket works. Rugby is a lot easier to follow—rugby I get. So were you good at sports? Interestingly enough, I know Millfield is well known for sport— my older sister was, and is fantastic when it comes to that. She did netball, a lot of hockey, and rounders. But Millfield also has a fantastic drama program. And from a very young age, rather than pursuing sport, I was always drawn to the creative side, and they were brilliant at pushing you to write pieces of your own, and perform pieces of your own. There were evenings whereby you could do whatever you wanted to do— whether that was dance or poetry or a bit of acting or singing, playing a musical instrument. And so, we were really encouraged by the school to explore. Then, after I was 18 and my A-Levels, my fabulous drama teacher—Mr [Alex] Boyd-Williams—helped me chose and hone my monologues to apply to LAMDA drama school. Helena from “A Midsummer Night’s Dream” was my “classic.” And my “modern” which was powerful, and rather harrowing, and very dark—but then, I’m kind of drawn to that—was from a Mike Bartlett play. Which is to say, the road to your playing “Emma” in the Crucible Theatre’s revival of Bartlett’s “Contractions” last year began when you were at Millfield. I really do owe my love of Bartlett and the enjoyment I find in reading his work to my drama teacher, Mr Boyd-Williams. He introduced to Bartlett, and pushed me in this particular direction. Was “Downton Abbey” in some sense your first “big break,” or somehow get you the role of Ygritte on “Game of Thrones?” Downton very much helped me land an agent, and be more confident in the acting world. And I felt incredibly privileged to have a job that lasted for 6 months. Before Downton everything I’d done was episodic, so that was a really really lovely, wonderful experience. I did hear from David Benioff’s office [GoT’s co-developer] that they happened to see me when Downton was airing in the US, and they were looking for an auburn-redhead. And as a result, I was one of many to audition for Ygritte. So [Downton] definitely helped me get my foot in the door, since I’m not sure I would have been able to audition for the role if I hadn’t been “seen.” But I feel it’s always a snowball effect— isn’t it? That each job lends to the next. Then, there’s also an element within my career driving which particular role or character I want to choose next. And hopefully through that there’s longevity.

[roselesliedaily]

Rose Leslie: ALL KINDS OF WOMEN OUT OF THEIR ‘COMFORT ZONE’ 04.27.2017

photography by KRISZTIAN EDER / story by GUY LESSER

As Gwen Dawson—the youngest house maid at “Downton Abbey”—she secretly dreamed of escaping a life of service, and becoming a secretary (in the show’s very first season). In a memorable season six cameo, she returned to visit England’s best known stately home, as the wife of a rising politician, an eloquent feminist, and an ardent advocate for the education of women.

In “Game of Thrones” she was the auburn-haired wilding archer Ygritte, for whom Jon Snow broke his Night’s Watch vow of chastity—kindling an impossible passion that both characters would deny, even to themselves, until she died in his arms (toward the end of Season 4), while the wilding armies lay siege to the Wall and Castle Black, telling Snow one last time (with a broad Lancashire accent) that he “know[s] nothing.”

As for the fate and fortunes of Rose Leslie’s latest character, Maia Rindell—a recent law school graduate (from a prominent and enormously wealthy Chicago family, who’s secured a job offer at the law firm of her godmother, Diane Lockhart)—this may depend less on Leslie— or her versatile gifts as an actress, or even on the storytelling skills of Robert and Michelle King in creating an absorbing sequel to their long-running CBS hit series “The Good Wife,” and rather more on the venerable broadcast channel’s marketing bet that it can launch its new subscription streaming service “All Access” by luring the old show’s loyal audience (of 10-13 million regular viewers over seven seasons) back to the colorful political and legal world of Alicia Florrick (played by Julianna Margulies, who won three Emmys and was nominated for seven more in the role), but without Margulies’ beloved character ever actually turning up in the sequel.

MONROWE recently caught up with Rose Leslie by phone, shortly after her return home to London following some five months living and shooting the first season of “The Good Fight” in Brooklyn, New York.

Guy Lesser: So, is Julianna Margulies going to be lured into appearing in Season 2 of “The Good Fight” when you all come back to shoot next fall?

Rose Leslie: I don’t believe so. I don’t believe so. No—but, as a mere actor, that’s not something I would ever be privy to. Were you wanting to see Juliana appear?

GL: Not necessarily. But when a character like Alicia doesn’t die, with, say—

RL: An arrow through the heart?

GL: There’s no closure to her storyline, and of course Alicia does periodically receive mention in “The Good Fight.”

RL: True, true. But I loved the way they ended “The Good Wife” and left the door open— even if there isn’t any way that that she’s going to come through it. But it also reflects life, when, you know, you’re not too sure whether you are going to see an old friend again.

GL: Were you a fan of the “The Good Wife” or was it Maia’s character that convinced you to take the part?

RL: I was completely drawn into the world that the Kings created in “The Good Wife,” and I felt completely honored to be asked to be part of that. But it was the writing that really got me. I feel that they are such bold writers, and such advocates for women, and as a result, I greatly admire their work. I knew this was something I would love to be part of—particularly when it came to Maia, and the opportunity to explore in depth one character through the arc of however many episodes. She wasn’t someone—despite the privilege she was brought up with—who felt entitled or was arrogant. She realized that she had to work incredibly hard to prove her worth to her peers and others. And I rather loved her backbone and her resilience. And certainly with everything that is thrown at her through the season. You see her flaws, but you also see that she’s passionate, and dedicated to the cause of fighting injustice, and I love the core of self-belief she has.

GL: Did you discuss Maia with the Kings?

RL: They asked me to read the pilot and to come back to them—to see what I thought, and whether I was a fan of this particular genre, and this particular universe, and the character. I really loved the pilot. And they were very open to discussion in terms of letting me know what the character’s arc would be in the first season, and helping me be aware of where the character was going to go.

GL: In some ways, she seems so different from other characters you’ve played.

RL: Obviously, I’ve had to be prepared to play all kinds of women. But I always find myself being drawn to playing characters who are forced to get out of their comfort zones. Hopefully that keeps it interesting for the audience, but certainly for me—along with the development within the character—it keeps it interesting.

GL: The fictional Rindell family is very clearly modeled on Bernie Madoff’s, with many of the same questions posed about who knew what, when, and who was blissfully ignorant about the family’s and Madoff’s investment fund’s extraordinary good fortune—particularly before the scandal broke. What sort of preparation was involved for playing someone who’s American, a lawyer, and the daughter of this sort of family?

RL: I had played a couple of American characters before, so I felt at ease with the accent, although I’d never approached a project where I was talking in American for nearly five and an a half months. I listened to voices on Youtube and American TV so it would come across as naturally as possible. But I was also surrounded by Americans on set— so if I wasn’t too sure about how to pronounce a particular word, I could just ask anyone. With Maia Rindell, I didn’t necessarily check out the bar exam—was that terrible of me? But I did do some research when it came to Ponzi schemes, and I read Stephanie Madoff Mack’s autobiography, “The End of Normal.” And of course that was her take on being married to Mark Madoff, and what they were thinking, and the horrific consequences after Bernie Madoff confessed. It seems just extraordinary, crazy in a way, that his surname was “made-off.”

GL: I actually went to a minor English boarding school, called “Mill Hill,” that is sometimes confused with your boarding school, Millfield—both because of its name, and for its prowess at team sports. Of course, not only did I not fit in, but even after two years of playing them, I’m still far from sure I understand either cricket or rugby.

RL: Cricket is still something I cannot wrap my head around. I’m lost halfway through the explanation. And I still don’t get it—not that I’m proud of that—I should understand how cricket works. Rugby is a lot easier to follow—rugby I get.

GL: So were you good at sports?

RL: Interestingly enough, I know Millfield is well known for sport— my older sister was, and is fantastic when it comes to that. She did netball, a lot of hockey, and rounders. But Millfield also has a fantastic drama program. And from a very young age, rather than pursuing sport, I was always drawn to the creative side, and they were brilliant at pushing you to write pieces of your own, and perform pieces of your own. There were evenings whereby you could do whatever you wanted to do— whether that was dance or poetry or a bit of acting or singing, playing a musical instrument. And so, we were really encouraged by the school to explore.

Then, after I was 18 and my A-Levels, my fabulous drama teacher—Mr [Alex] Boyd-Williams—helped me chose and hone my monologues to apply to LAMDA drama school. Helena from “A Midsummer Night’s Dream” was my “classic.” And my “modern” which was powerful, and rather harrowing, and very dark—but then, I’m kind of drawn to that—was from a Mike Bartlett play.

GL: Which is to say, the road to your playing “Emma” in the Crucible Theatre’s revival of Bartlett’s “Contractions” last year began when you were at Millfield.

RL: I really do owe my love of Bartlett and the enjoyment I find in reading his work to my drama teacher, Mr Boyd-Williams. He introduced me to Bartlett, and pushed me in this particular direction.

GL: Was “Downton Abbey” in some sense your first “big break,” or somehow get you the role of Ygritte on “Game of Thrones?”

RL: Downton very much helped me land an agent, and be more confident in the acting world. And I felt incredibly privileged to have a job that lasted for 6 months. Before Downton everything I’d done was episodic, so that was a really really lovely, wonderful experience.

I did hear from David Benioff’s office [GoT’s co-developer} that they happened to see me when Downton was airing in the US, and they were looking for an auburn-redhead. And as a result, I was one of many to audition for Ygritte. So [Downton] definitely helped me get my foot in the door, since I’m not sure I would have been able to audition for the role if I hadn’t been “seen.” But I feel it’s always a snowball effect— isn’t it? That each job lends to the next. Then, there’s also an element within my career driving which particular role or character I want to choose next. And hopefully through that there’s longevity. . . .