#I did my makeup to go see my aunt in an addams family play and I was Inspired

[my-t4t-romance]

pov you are jane trying to take a god damned nap

[germhammy]

(Mis)Adventures of Little Wednesday - aka Wednesday’s mirror image niece

“Sunday Brunch”

Daisy: this is lovely, Wednesday. I didn’t know you had it in you to choose such a nice normal place. Given your disposition

Jane: I chose this place. We had a meeting with some other horror writers not to long ago and I mentioned to Nes we should invite you to brunch here since Dayton has became friends with my twins. You seem to forget Nes is their aunt. Her brother and I are the twins parents

Daisy: Well? It seems that she is the one mostly picking them up. Her or her friend.

Jane: although both of us work from home? Nes is not my only client. I am often on conference calls or zoom meetings. It is much easier for Nes or her wife to pick up the twins

Daisy: my previous pookie suddenly seems to talk a lot about your demons and their ruffian friends since first spending the day at your place. What did you do to him?

Wednesday: your husband brought him over. Blame him. Not me, or my niece. You were out at your makeup conference. Dalton had to step in and coach a team. Dayton didn’t want to go and asked if he could come to our house. GJ and Wednesday welcomed him. He enjoyed himself. Tyler invited him to watch him the following weekend. Tyler’s family are circus performers

Daisy: about that. I do not wish my precious pookie witnessing such dangerous feats! What if he decides he wants to imitate them?

Jane: then I think that’s on you to make sure he understands the dangers. My husband and sister in law know the dangers and make sure the twins practice safety. Katelyn and Brennan are also professionals. Tyler knows the dangers and how to safely perform as well as his limitations

Daisy: my precious pookie told me he played with a guillotine! My stars! A guillotine! Are you okay with that?

Jane: yes. Nes has made it very clear to Wednesday that it is dangerous and not to put things on the chopping block that she does not wish to be destroyed or that can get hurt or die.

Daisy: but it’s a medieval torture device!!

Wednesday: Execution, not torture. A torture device is meant to cause pain not death. Death is often a side effect or means to an end. One does not usually survive the guillotine unless there is a critical failure

Jane: Nessie!! That is not how you reassure a person!

Wednesday: what? It’s true. And if one properly maintains and performs proper maintenance on a guillotine a critical failure is rare

Jane sighed as Daisy dramatically gasped

Wednesday: rest assured. Wednesday knows not to put herself or others in danger when operating her guillotine. We also make sure any roaming pets are trained to stay away or secured away

Daisy: -gasping- my precious pookie brought home a bag of bugs the other day! He was eating them! Oh my goodness!! I threw them away. Washed his mouth out with soap.

Wednesday: Chapulines. Fried grasshoppers or crickets. Lucky for you relatively inexpensive. It is a favorite snack in the Addams household. Everyone likes them, especially Wednesday. Everyone that is except my wife. But she has more respect for our food than you! Now I see where Dayton picked up his bullying tendencies from when it came to Wednesday’s lunches.

Daisy: Jane! This can not be true can it? I mean really? Grasshoppers and crickets?

Jane: just because you find it disgusting? It may be a staple in someone else’s culture. When I travelled to Thailand I had deep fried scorpions. They were delicious.

Wednesday: I could never eat that. I think I would cry.

Jane: I know. I’m sorry for bringing that up

Wednesday: no it is all right. It is the point you are making, and before you met me. -turning to Daisy- Before you judge someone’s food? You should have respect and possibly even try it. I cannot possibly eat a scorpion not because it’s a scorpion. But because I had one as a pet when I was little. And I miss him dearly to this day. If ethically sourced? I would eat almost anything

Daisy: lobsters!! Oh my heavens! So delicious.

Jane: I do love lobster. Wednesday does not

Daisy: why? Because it looks like a scorpion?

Wednesday: No. I do not care for shellfish. Shrimp, lobster, crab, oysters, clams…. It my choice not to eat them. But I do not ask Jane to not enjoy her lobster in front of me. My father loves shellfish. If my family wishes to go to a place to enjoy in such foods? I only ask that they make sure there is something I can eat.

Daisy: you gave my precious pookie a bag of bugs!

Wednesday: Chapulines

Daisy: I do not care what they are called. They were bugs! And my precious pookie was eating them!

Wednesday: Katelyn makes them for Tyler all the time. Although they prefer to mix in Ghost peppers, which is not bad by any means, my preferred way of making them is with lime, salt and a milder chili. Tyler and Wednesday share their chapulines all the time. Dayton asked Wednesday if he could try one. He discovered he liked them. So when I made some for Wednesday to take to school she asked if I could give her extra for Dayton.

Daisy: just you and your weird disgusting foods! I will not have you influencing my precious pookie like that

Wednesday: it is merely Mexican food.

Daisy: it is not! Mexican food is burritos and tacos! Not fried bugs!

Wednesday: are you really that narrow minded? Mexican food is more than tacos and burritos. As Japanese food is more than sushi and ramen. Korean food more than kimchi. Italian is more than pasta and pizza. My wife and my father love trying new food from around the world. Although she does not enjoy chapulines? She does like fried ants. They are not the ants you find in your house. They are harvested red ants. She has also grown to like escamole as well

Jane: I invited you to brunch, Daisy so we could possibly get to know each other better since GJ and Wednesday are becoming friends with Dayton. Not for you to insult my in laws and their food

Daisy: but her so called food is disgusting!

Wednesday: it is a matter of perspective.

Daisy: I will not subject my precious pookie to such barbarism!

Wednesday shook her head.

Jane: suit yourself. Disappoint your son. Dayton has enjoyed the two weekends he had spent with the gang. Katelyn told me how much everyone enjoyed the circus. And how much fun they had at dinner getting burgers and ice cream. It would be a shame to deprive Dayton from spending time with his new friends. I believe Moana and Koa are having a luau next weekend. Wednesday and I cannot make it as it’s a press junket day for her new novel. But Pugsley, the twins and my mother in law, father in law and Nes’s wife are going. As are the rest of the gang and their parents. I’m sure Koda will or has invited Dayton

Daisy: my precious pookie has mentioned no sure thing!

Wednesday: maybe because he knows you will say no. And do you even know your son’s name?

Daisy: of course I know his name! What kind of question is that?

Wednesday: well. You have not called him by his name once during this conversation. I have referred to my niece by her name. Wednesday. Not by my nickname for her. Jane has referred to her son and daughter by their names. GJ and Wednesday. Not once have I heard you call your son, Dayton. I do not always call my niece El Diablo or Mi Diablo. She is my Little Wednesday

Daisy gasping with false offense

Daisy: well! I never!

Wednesday: obviously -rolling her eyes-

Jane: Nessie! Stop it.

Wednesday: fine

Jane: well. I think we are finished. It was nice having brunch with you, Daisy. ‘Til next time -glares at her sister in law

Jane and Wednesday get up and leave