#I deserve to be able to drink you without worrying about manufacturing it with my hands

[gonzodangerfeels]

Praise be thanks to the algorithm which chooses which picture to show me when I hover and lock the start button

[bippityboppitybibuck]

Scarred Bark, Broken Heart

15x18 coda/alternate ending of sorts || WC 2580, also read on AO3 here

MCD, depressed Dean, (Tree!Cas ???), brief mention of suicidal tendencies, open but hopeful ending, part one of a two part series, Canon divergence

Dean doesn't know what made him decide on the tree. They didn’t have a body to burn, not this time. They didn’t have a six-foot hole to dig and he felt odd putting a marker over unmarred earth. So when he stumbled upon a tree in the woods surrounding the bunker, one with a beehive tucked nine feet up he didn’t even realize he had popped out his pocket knife and started carving until the first three letters were written in the wet bark.

His throat burned as he worked. The same knife sliced skin wide so that protection could be painted onto a door that was never going to hold. Cas was always ready to bleed for him, always ready to do whatever he needed to keep him safe.

Tears threatened to ruin his work by blocking his field of view but each time he tilted his head to the sky and tried to breathe through it.

The squared-off letters seem to mock him once he finishes, if Cas’d been here the letters would have been beautiful, a burst of power and it could have been script etched into the wood. Instead, it's his blocky ugly writing.

Something hideous rears its head in his chest, and staring at the letters, staring at the name. He always deserved more than Dean could give him, than this world could give him. He deserves more than a scar in some bark in a forest hardly anyone treks into. He deserves more than to die without knowing—to die thinking he wasn’t loved.

Dean doesn't look to the sky as his eyes fill again. Sam always said he needed to let himself feel. That ignoring your trauma isn't the same as dealing with it. But he worries that if he gives into it fully he’ll never resurface. Drowned in his own mind with the pain and regret, the fear and the sadness that washes in like the tide when his guard drops.

So he doesn’t let himself sink, he treads as best he can, hearing Bobby’s gruff voice in his head just like when he was a kid, ‘keep your ears above water son, that’s the only way to make sure you stay alive out there’, it’s like Bobby knew exactly why he needed that information. Like he knew it wasn't about swimming.

He’s not sure how long he spends looking at the carving, or when the wind picks up and shakes shivers through his body. He’s not sure when the tears dry and the wracking sobs take over.

Cas looked at peace when it came for him, and it ruins him to know that. To know that loving him brought him to the one moment of true happiness. Loving a worthless, broken, fucked up killer—no. No, Cas said he wasn’t a killer, he wasn’t a monster or a tool to be used and thrown aside, and yet he killed another hadn’t he? Killed him by doing nothing at all because that's what happens, that’s his legacy, people get close to him and they get killed. They always get killed.

Dean’s not sure when he heads inside again, or how he finds himself at the tree almost every day, week in and week out.

For the longest time he can do nothing but look, words that fight to break free, stay trapped behind the years of burying what he always felt, stay tapped behind the last dam he has standing in his soul the soul Cas saved—a good lot that did. He knows the dam won’t hold forever and all he can do is imagine the damage when it does finally break.

He doesn't always go alone either. Sam takes trips to the tree by himself sometimes but mostly he goes when Dean does. Jack trails after him every once in a while too but they usually let him go alone.

The first snow of the season begins to fall as he stands at the tree, the beehive long since gone dormant, its occupants burrowing in for their months-long sleep. And God how Dean envies their ability to escape reality for longer than it takes to sleep off a hangover.

It’s early for the first snow, weeks too soon but the world has been colder since—well since.

It’s been a while since he last talked while he visited, the dam broke finally or rather the levels grew too high on one side and it began to leak. Still, back then he hadn’t said much of anything.

He tries to talk now, he tries to do the same as what he did at his father's grave all those years ago trapped in a djinn dream, trapped in a world that seemed so perfect until he peeled back its layers. Kinda just like the one he actually lived in.

“Ca-s,” his voice breaks before he manages to speak the single syllable. No one is around to notice though, no matter how much he wishes he was speaking to a person instead of an unfeeling unrelenting piece of wood. Still though, it's easier to talk when no one is there to hear it, he doesn't have to hold as much back.

“Cas, I-,” Dean lets out a rough hum as he collects himself. This speech is going to be different. He can feel it, the emotions within him seem to grow choppy, spilling over the dam wall more and more and he just knows that whatever happens, he won’t be returning to the bunker whole.

“I keep thinking, y’know, back to that night you walked into that barn in Illinois, you told me that good things do happen, and I mean it’s not like I expected you to, but you didn’t believe me when I told you that nothing good happens to me. I don’t know if in the time from then to no—I don’t know if you ever figured out that I was right or not but I think that the one good thing that happened to me was the worst thing to happen to me too.” Dean stares at his name, willing it to actually be him. The cold bites at his fingers and his nose. His toes grow cold in his boots but he doesn’t move to leave he barely even feels it anyways.

“When Chuck told us that you were the one who never listened,” he chokes out a broken laugh, “it honestly made perfect sense, you did always say that it was our story, that we were the thing that was real in a world of manufactured realities. And when he said it I swear it was like I was standing in that ratty kitchen, minutes before Lucifer rose, minutes before you di—died for the first time. And I thought as Chuck went on and on how maybe I wasn’t dreaming it up, maybe it wasn't Chuck’s doing, and I was going to try to talk to you about it, after a shit ton of booze mind you.” He’s quiet for a long time, the snow begins to blanket the space around him and he thinks about how he’ll never get to brush snow off of the lapel of Cas’ stupid trench coat.

Just the thought starts a domino effect, his mind rushing through everything he wanted and everything he’ll never get now and it’s so overwhelming it sends him to his knees. Of course, because he clearly will never be able to catch a break all it does is remind him of the last time they were in purgatory together, the fear and heartbreak that shook him to his core, the devastation of Cas brushing off what he wanted to say because fuck it was so much more than his prayer.

“You beat me to it though, and then—well we both know what happened next.” His fingers are ice when they wipe the tears from his eyes. They jolt him, a shock to his system.

“You never gave me a chance to respond, didn’t even give me a damn moment to process any of it. And you’re a selfish son of a bitch for that because that wasn’t fair, that wasn’t—. I needed you to stay, I needed you to hear it too. I won’t ever be able to stay mad at you because I never have been, not for any of the shit you pulled in the past. But that? That was a new low.” He sniffles from the cold or from his tears he doesn't know but he does it all the same.

“Y’know if you were here right now you’d tell me to go inside because humans catch colds so easily and you don’t know how fucking much I need to hear that now Cas.” His heart plummets in his chest again. He feels sick all over again so he clenches his jaw to keep from heading too far down that road.

“I remember the first time you got sick, god you were a nightmare the entire time and I dealt with Sam getting sick every year since I was old enough to open kids cold medicine,” Dean laughs thickly, tears lodged in his throat. The strain of holding it all back shreds at the muscle and it screams with every breath he manages to shake into his lungs.

“I remember everything Cas, all of it, every fight, every drink, every goddamn time we looked at each other. And yet I can’t recall a fucking thing because I thought I had more time. After everything we’d gone through, I still thought we would have more time. It's all broken and jumbled and set to static and I can’t handle it because it's crystal clear and as muddy as anything because I thought I’d be able to make more, replace what got muddled. I thought you had more time.”

He shuffles around and presses his back against the trunk of the tree. His ass is uncomfortable as hell what with the roots and the wet cold earth below him but his knees appreciate the switch.

“I’m having a hard time this time because a part of me thinks just like it did after the whole leviathan fiasco. I swear you’re going to come back, that this is all a mix-up, that if I wait just a little longer, hold on a little longer, put my gun down just one more night that you’ll be back. But it’s been weeks Cas and nothing’s changed. I wake up and I go to sleep in a world that doesn’t have you in it and I was always okay before because you were just there even if I didn’t have you like I wanted I still got to see you, watch you, lo—be with you. But now it’s all empty, and no matter how ironically appropriate that is given the dumbass move you made a year and a half ago, I’m hanging on by a thread man. And Sam doesn't know how to help, even with all his dead girlfriends as experience to draw from.” He’s quiet for a long time, chewing on his lip, flexing his fingers together as he just sits.

“He says I need to stop making jokes to cover it all up but that's all I know how to do. I mean you can’t mourn your mom if you have a baby brother to take care of so you joke. You can’t talk about what the internet says is PTSD because there are monsters to hunt and people to save so you joke. You can’t let yourself be vulnerable because that means death so you joke. You can't tell your best friend what you need to so you joke. You hide behind something safe because no one wants you to show what's really there.” Dean's mind is a mess right now, jumping from one point to another, skipping ahead and falling behind. He has so much he wants to say and it’s like he’s trying to say it all at once.

He can almost hear Cas’ voice admonishing him for thinking that he didn't have a support system, that he didn't have people who loved him and wanted him to be okay and it strips him raw. Because it’s only been a few months, how could he already be forgetting his voice, or which way he tilted his head when he didn’t understand some random human action, which foot he started with when he stood up from a chair, if he liked smooth or crunchy peanut butter better even if it was all molecules to him, what his arms felt like wrapped around him, how he sighed when Dean was being an idiot, what his smiles looked like as he sat at their kitchen table talking with Jack.

How was he already forgetting all of the little things that made him fall for the fallen angel, heaven's most loved, heaven's most corrupted.

His chest is cracked so wide every part of him falls inside, his very soul falls into the pit, tumbles down and down and down because there are a million things that he and Cas will never get to do but there are a billion things Cas will never do again.

Sure Cas’ll never learn to dance but he’ll never smile again. He’ll never have the chance to memorize the words to the songs Dean showed him but he’ll never feel the sun on his skin again. Or laugh or cry or sleep in late. He’s never going to make another milk run, be it a monster hunt or an actual milk run. He’ll never watch another bee documentary or hug his son again.

Cas lived hundreds of millions of years and yet there was so much he left unfinished, he’s been around for eons and yet he still died too soon.

It takes him a moment to remember that even if Cas had been around since the Cambrian explosion in reality he’d only experienced humanity for eleven years. And all of it was spent fighting, shouldn't he get a fucking chance to just live for a fucking second. Let himself relax, shake the weight off his shoulders, just be finally?

Dean turns and looks from his position at Cas' name, the angle is atrocious so he can barely see the etchings.

There are a billion things he’ll never do again, a million things he’ll never get to experience. And for someone who's given all that Cas has given to this world, that just won’t do.

“You told me love drove me, you said that I fought for everything because of love, that I taught you how to and fuck Cas I don’t know how that's possible. But I’ve fought for nearly forty years because of love and there's no way in hell I am stopping that now. I’m going to fight for you, I’ll fight Chuck for you, I’ll fight against the anger that still lives inside me and dammit I’ll fight to get you back because no fucking way am I losing you forever after that speech. If love drives me Cas then you, you…” Dean takes a deep breath. “Happiness is in just saying it, but I can’t tell a piece of wood, so I’ll wait until you are back, because I will get you back. I don’t care what it takes. You need to hear it, you deserve to hear it. You deserve to know.”

I’m working on a rewritten ending for Supernatural that is set after this little alt ending to 15x18 because the actual ending... left a lot to be desired. Turns out spite was in fact enough to get me writing again! So that’s good right??

[hexusproductions]

Oz Squad - 50 Questions

Answering a list of 50 character questions in-character. The original list can be found here. 

Note: All boys were ‘questioned’ separately, but for the sake of brevity, all of their responses have been collected together.

1. Are you a morning person or more of a night owl?

D: “Morning person, I guess. But like, manufactured, after getting up at an early hour every morning.”

O: “I get up a lot during the night, because I can’t sleep. I’m more of a 24-hour owl.”

J: “I love getting up when it’s still early and seeing all the warm sunshine. It lets me check on my garden too, make sure they’re all doing okay.”

2. What’s the first thing you notice about a person when you meet them?

D: “Shoes. I don’t look at people when I meet them, so I usually end up seeing their shoes in more detail first. Which…does sound a little creepy.”

O: “Hands. Specifically what they’re doing, like a handshake or stuck in pockets.”

J: “How big they are! Like I’m mentally taking their measurements, in case I need to make something for them.”

3. You see a huge spider in your room. What do you do?

D: “Move away slowly, and then use my quirk to try and slingshot it out the window.”

O: “Grab a shoe. Sneak up so you don’t spook it into running, because then you can’t find them again.”

J: “No no no. Get away as fast as possible.”

4. If you could go back and change one decision you made in the past, what would you change?

D: “Only one decision? Okay. I guess I would try to do better in the entrance exam? Maybe I would actually be able to pass this time.”

O: “I guess, um. I guess I would stop mom from leaving the house on the day of the accident.”

J: “I would stop my last prototype from exploding. There was smoke everywhere. People were very mad.”

5. Tell me about your first kiss.

D: “Mine was with Ozzy. I think he figured out I had a crush on him and he kissed me while we were studying together. It was nice.”

O: “Nothing special, really. She was my friend and we tried dating but eventually figured out we’d be better staying friends. There’s no hard feelings.”

J: *Blushy giggles* “It was sweet.”

6. Do you give people second chances?

D: “If they want one, then I’ll give them another chance. They deserve an opportunity. Right?”

O: “People who’ve made a mistake, I’ll give them as many chances as they want to fix that. People who fuck up, as in majorly, get one second chance. There won’t be any more after that.”

J: “If you’ve done something bad enough that I feel like you need to ask for a second chance, then that’s the only chance you’ll get. I’ll be keeping a close eye on you during that chance.”

7. Are you a cat person or a dog person?

D: “Um, I don’t know?? Dogs are cool, I guess.”

O: “I would die for any dog.”

J: “Both are great!! Except when they eat my plants. Then that’s bad, please don’t do that you’ll get sick.”

8. Do you think you’re attractive?

D: “I got a boyfriend, somehow, so that’s fucking incredible.”

O: “Meh. If I am I’m not trying to be. I do feel like I am when I’m in my hero gear.”

J: “I’m cute, and I don’t always like that. Sometimes it’s nice, but sometimes it isn’t.”

9. What’s your worst habit?

D: “All of them. Um, sorry, I mean, I say things without thinking?? It’s a real problem.”

O: “I worry. I don’t want anyone to get hurt, emotionally or physically. I feel like it’s my job to stop that from happening.”

J: “I mean, occasionally I can get a little side-tracked. Other people get annoyed with me for it, but it’s kind of like my brain is a train that keeps going along the track even when it should be stopping. Stopping for passengers and fuel and things, stuff like that.”

10. When was the last time you cried?

D: “Like two days ago probably.”

O: “Not sure. I think it was when Dion went missing during his internship.”

J: “Uhh…I do try not to cry too often. I don’t wanna seem, uh, unmanly. The last time I cried was because Higan was going through some stuff and he seemed really upset and my heart kinda broke for him.”

11. Are you a good liar?

D: “I break super easy if someone puts pressure on me. If I don’t crack then I might be able to get away with it.”

O: “I think so. People take almost everything I say at face value because my tone is like, monotone. I don’t lie much but when I do, I use that to my advantage.”

J: “Not really. I keep piling things on until people can tell that I’m not telling the truth. My best lies have been when I wasn’t paying attention.”

12. What’s your biggest pet peeve?

D: “I try to let people do what they want. But, piling on unnecessary pressure, especially after being told to stop because it’s causing stress for other people.”

O: “People who act cocky and proud after they’ve lost. The ‘I let you win’ people.”

J: “Being interrupted while someone is trying to talk.”

13. Have you ever had your heart broken?

D: “I guess, technically. I think some people might not care about me as much as I thought.”

O: “You mean in the romantic way? Not really.

J: “Sort of. It breaks for my friends because of things that were done to them, not because of them.”

14. Are you more likely to use your fists or your words in an argument?

D: “Words start coming out first. I’m not great with my fists, and I’d like the argument to end quickly.”

O: “Words first, as a warning. Then fists if things don’t calm down.”

J: “Words…? I don’t usually get into arguments.”

15. What’s something you’re naturally good at?

D: “Um…I don’t know. My quirk’s pretty powerful but I can’t get it up to those levels without being super stressed out. So, nothing, really.”

O: “Keeping a level head. Staying consistent.”

J: “I can eat three or four Warheads at once!”

16. What’s something you had to work hard to be good at?

D: “Helping people and being worthy of being a hero. I only got into the course because I worked hard and I didn’t want to disappoint anyone.”

O: “Combat. My dad owns a gym, so that helps.”

J: “I’ve gotten way better at inventing things so they do what I want them to. Same with ‘reading the room’, so that way I know what I’m supposed to be doing instead of going off and doing my own thing.”

17. Can you tell when someone is flirting with you?

D: “Yes and no? If I start thinking someone’s flirting with me I get really fidgety, but sometimes they’re not, and I have to apologise for getting it wrong.”

O: “Usually, yeah. I don’t always stop ‘em but I don’t reciprocate if I’m not feeling the same way.”

J: “Nope. If I’m not focused on what you’re saying then it goes completely over my head.”

18. Do you think money can buy happiness?

D: “Maybe. It might be nice to test out, just for a bit.”

O: “No. Only giving someone what they need can.”

J: “Yeah! If you have more money you can buy even more stuff.”

19. Do you believe in destiny?

D: “All destiny is made up, right? Being told you were meant for something is something only real people do.”

O: “The idea that someone’s whole life has been leading up to one point is super cool. It sounds like an underdog story.”

J: “I think some people have a destiny, but some people are free to explore and do whatever they want.”  

20. Are you a good cook?

D: “I can make noodles and eggs, and toast. Only really simple things. I’m very good at making food quickly.”

O: “I improved when I started making more dinners and lunches. Sometimes I bring leftovers to school too.”

J: “I’m not good in a kitchen. No-one trusts me in a kitchen either. A lot of yelling happens.”

21. What do you think happens after you die?

D: “A funeral. Your loved ones show up and they grieve. Hopefully.”

O: “I hope Heaven and Hell exist. Just for the people I want to end up eventually in a better place. Not now, but someday.”

J: “I don’t think about it. Something good, that’s all I wish for.”

22. Did you have to grow up fast?

D: “I got rushed. Um, I mean, I’m sure everyone had the best intentions and wanted me to do my best! It did seem really fast though.”

O: “Yeah…kinda did. I know it was only recently, but it feels like I lost that whole year I was gone while my family put ourselves back together.”

J: “No, not really. Felt kind of slow, actually. I feel a little guilty, you know? All of my friends seem to be doing worse than I am, or I feel like I’m doing better. It feels unfair. They shouldn’t have to live with what they’re going through.”

23. Who do you look up to?

D: “…I don’t wanna answer this one.”

O: “My dad. Heroes like Gang Orca and Eraserhead. All total badasses who win the fight or give as much as they can while trying.”

J: “I look up to my family, my friends, and myself. I want to push myself to do the best I can every single day.”

24. When you go to a tavern, what do you order?

D: “Just like soft drink or something. Something sugary.”

O: “Water. Simple and refreshing.”

J: “Lemonade, the sourer the better.”

25. What do you like most about yourself?

D: “Not much, really. Um, sorry. I guess…I’m a hard worker. I work hard.”

O: “I’m smart and I can win a fight. I take care of people and I protect them from being hurt again.”

J: “I’m very clever. I’m always coming up with new ideas. Not all of them all allowed, but most of them are really good.”

26. What do you like least about yourself?

D: “That I don’t seem to be enough.”

O: “I always say I’m fine.”

J: “I’m not happy with my body yet. But it’ll get there! Eventually.”

27. Do you want kids someday?

D: “I don’t want to mess them up. I mean, I don’t know.”

O: “Yeah, sure. I like the idea of being a dad. I’d just want my own house first.”

J: “Kids? Hm…at the moment, I don’t think I want kids. They’re great, but if things go my way I’ll be working long hours all the time and have a bank loan or something. Hypothetical future me is way too busy.”

28. Are you a planner, or more spontaneous?

D: “I like having a plan. If I know what I’m meant to do, then that helps avoid a panic attack. They can get pretty bad.”

O: “I take things as they come along. In the middle of a fight it’s especially helpful to be able to think on my feet.”

J: “I always have an initial plan and then I get taken on a few detours here and there. Does that mean I’m a bit of both?”

29. Can you keep a secret?

D: “Same thing with lying but way worse. Nobody tells me secrets, because as soon as I let my guard down, I say it out loud. I don’t blame them for not telling me though, I understand. I’m trying to work on it.”

O: “As long as it’s not hurting anyone I’ll keep the secret as long as I can.”

J: “Sure, why, did you want to tell me something?”

30. Do you like being the centre of attention?

D: “No, no, it’s awful. I’d rather be a little off to the side, the side of the centre of attention. That probably doesn’t make a lot of sense…”

O: “I love it. Gives me an excuse to show off for a bit.”

J: “I like to be in the centre of attention occasionally, when I have something I’d like to talk about. Otherwise I’d rather point the spotlight at someone else, give them an opportunity to have the same thing.”

31. If you knew you were going to die tomorrow, what would you do today?

D: “And there was no way out of it? I would be honest. With everyone. I’d tell everyone exactly what I think and I wouldn’t care about the consequences.”

O: “…oh, jeeze. I don’t know. I’d give everyone a hug. My mum, dad, the lads, Dion. I’ll hug Higan, even if he accidentally poisons me. Just…just so they know that I care about them.”

J: “I would tell everyone so that we could stop it from happening.”

32. Do you enjoy getting all dressed up for a special occasion?

D: “Yeah but it usually doesn’t end up turning out that way. I get told what to wear and when to go and what I should be doing, until eventually I just go along with it just to get it over with.”

O: “I usually end up looking like a mess because I rush getting ready. I have never once worn a tie properly in my life.”

J: “I don’t think I have a lot in my closet for ‘dressing up’. I have a lot of short sleeve button-up shirts, I think I can get away with those. I really prefer wearing overalls.”

33. Where do you feel safe?

D: “Alone. I mean, when I’m not being watched.”

O: “In a boxing ring, or any kind of sparring match. Even though we’re encouraged to be a little aggressive, at the end of the day, everything is in a controlled environment.”

J: “Working. You know that sweet spot when you’re super invested and focused and nothing can distract you? That’s the best.”

34. Do you love or hate being alone?

D: “Being alone is great to start with. But, after a while, the room – the lack of company – gets to me and I start thinking I’ve forgotten to do something important.”

O: “Not really, to be honest. I like having one or two other people around, even if they’re existing and doing their own thing.”

J: “I actually do like being by myself, because it lets me do whatever I want, without disturbing anyone else.”

35. What’s the last nightmare you remember having?

D: “I haven’t had nightmares since I was a little kid. None that I’ve seen. I was being chased by some big ball-shaped thing with a big mouth.”

O: “Mm…no, I don’t want to talk about it. Please. …It was recent.”

J: “Be-Being impaled. I couldn’t breathe, my throat was full of, moss or something.”

36. Do you admit to mistakes when you make them?

D: “Always. Sometimes when I haven’t actually made a mistake.”

O: “I’ll say sorry. That’s the same thing, right?”

J: “I always try to say sorry and fix my mistake. I try extra hard if I’ve made someone upset.”

37. Do you want to grow up to be like your parents?

D: “That’s what I’m supposed to do. Be a great hero, in the top ten just like my dad. But I don’t know if that’s possible for me to do, and I don’t want to think about what he’ll do if I don’t succeed.”

O: “Yes, definitely. My parents are both strong in different ways, and I would love to be just like them.”

J: “I’d like to grow past them. I love them and my dad is pretty good in his field, so I’d like to get to the same point he is and then reach above that.”

38. How do you deal with being sick? Are you stoic, or super whiny?

D: “I don’t say anything about it unless it’s like, asking my mom for a sick day. I can take care of myself for the day.”

O: “Completely stoic. People don’t usually realise until I have a sneezing fit or something.”

J: “I stay away from everyone but it still sucks!! I just want it to be over so I can get back to work.”

39. What did your parents expect from you when you were born?

D: “The next great pro hero.”

O: “A rowdy boy that was going to make a mess of the furniture.”

J: “I don’t think they expected anything, really. I think they want to see what me and my little sister turn into, and support us from there.”

40. Do you have a strong sense of style?

D: “I don’t know, maybe. Most of my clothes are pretty basic. I’ve never really experimented before to see if I have any sense of style.”

O: “Ha, not really. I’ll wear what’s comfy. It can be covered in bright orange spots for all I care, as long as I’m comfortable.”

J: “Overalls and sunflower print are my signature style! They’re always my go-to.”

41. Would you rather camp outdoors or stay the night in an inn?

D: “Camping outside sounds like fun! I’m totally up for that.”

O: “An inn sounds safer, honestly.”

J: “Um, maybe inside? There’s a lot of risks in camping. There’s a lot of stories, too. About people being murdered…”

42. Is there a food that most people like that you absolutely hate?

D: “Jasper’s sherbet things are gross, honestly. But there’s nothing wrong with him liking them! They’re just too sour for me, and there’s too much in one pack.”

O: “Jelly. It’s a gross texture.”

J: “Huh, not really. I can’t really eat spicy food, but that’s pretty common.”

43. Are you more of a hoarder or a minimalist?

D: “I like hoarding when it comes to places like my bedroom, where it’s supposed to be my space. It feels good to personalise where I’m living, and I like to do that with as much as I can pack in there.”

O: “Minimalist, I guess. I usually get rid of stuff if I don’t use it anymore, see if any of my friends want it second-hand. I think the only exception is clothes, I like the look of torn clothing.”

J: “I like having lots of stuff. It’s all organised, so I know where to find everything.”

44. Are you superstitious?

D: “I’ll go along with all the luck superstitions, just in case. I’d like to think angels and demons are real, because I like those.”

O: “It’s fun to engage in, but I don’t really take it too seriously.”

J: “Ghosts will kill us if we invite them into our homes.”

45. Are you the kind of person who remembers people’s birthdays and pets’ names and stuff?

D: “I have all the special dates in my calendar so I don’t forget them.”

O: “Pet names are easy to remember. Birthdays can slip my mind, especially if I haven’t slept in a while.”

J: “Of course, doesn’t everyone?”

46. What do you do to feel better when you’re sad?

D: “Keep it to myself so that nobody sees and gets mad. Then I can let it out later.”

O: “Lie in bed, maybe take a nap. Have some alone time where I can just exist for a while and not really think.”

J: “I don’t really have any good methods. I guess I tell people I’m not doing okay, then they know why I’m keeping a distance, or they can try to help, if they want.”

47. Is it hard for you to trust someone?

D: “Not really. I end up saying stupid things in front of people and based on how they react, I know whether they’re someone who’s okay with me saying stupid things.”

O: “I put my trust in people pretty quickly, once I know what they’re about. If they’re not a murderer after the first impression, then sure, welcome aboard.

J: “I only tell people certain things if I haven’t known them for long. We have to be okay for a while for me to tell you the rest.”

48. Are you susceptible to peer pressure?

D: “Yeah, unfortunately. I’m trying to work on working through pressure instead of panicking.”

O: “I don’t have to worry about peer pressure because I’m usually the one doing the pressuring. It’s how I became friends with Higan – my other friends told me he was a freak, but I ignored them and wore Higan down until he agreed to hang out with me.”

J: “People tell me ‘We’re doing this’ and I’ll be like ‘okay’ and listen to them. That’s not peer pressure, I just like hanging out with my friends.”

49. If you decided to stop adventuring and settle down, what kind of job would you take?

D: “If I didn’t finish school and become a pro hero I think my dad would disown me, haha. Maybe work at the planetarium? I don’t know, I’m not really into space that much.”

O: “I’d take a job at my dad’s gym. If the best I can do to protect people is give self-defence classes, then I’ll take it.”

J: “A general engineer? Maybe go to another university and learn robotics!! Whoa!! That could be really good!”

50. As a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

D: “I wanted to be a super cool hero like my mom and dad. The big hands on the hips poses, the confident smile, I idolised all of that.”

O: “…Human cannonball…”

J: “I wanted to be a Power Ranger. I’d fight bad guys and protect my entire backyard.”

[qqueenofhades]

So dare I ask what the nightmare in detail is regarding Brexit right now?

@tollers-and-jack said: I’m asking for the rant…

@rhymeswithtessa said: I’m a big fan of your rants gimme your thoughts on brexit

@onlymorelove said: Ahem. I am interested in your rant. If you feel like sharing. 💗

Ahaha wow. Apparently this is something the people really want to hear about. Disclaimer, just remember that you asked for this, and that this is, as Captain Holt would say, a trigger for me. So if this periodically devolves into incoherent screaming/application of capital letters and exclamation marks, and what have you, just know that.

So… I wrote these posts soon after Brexit in 2016 explaining what a spectacularly stupid idea it was even then. If I said anything optimistic in those posts, in a sort of grasping-at-straws-maybe-this-will-work sort of flailing way, please disregard it. We have had empirical evidence of how this played out. Spoiler alert: it failed. It failed so comprehensively on every possible level that it seems almost ludicrous for a supposedly modern political system, but this is 2019, the world is dogshit, and we are all retreating into our little late-capitalism xenophobia bubbles with our right-wing strongmen and our populist rhetoric and the UK is now a global laughingstock. Which believe me, the ex-British Empire richly deserves, especially given the part that anti-immigration paranoia played in this whole debacle, but also, I live here and really would Rather Not.

I do not even know how to sum up the ridiculousness of the past few months, where – almost at the end of the two-year period of triggering Article 50, with just a very short amount of time to the original exit date (29 March 2019) – the UK finally managed to secure a withdrawal deal. Mind you, it was a shit deal that both sides hated, but by golly, It Made Brexit Happen, and since the Theresa May-bot has only been able to repeat over and over that she will Make Brexit Happen, there you have it. Not surprisingly, it proceeded to be comprehensively defeated in Parliament by the largest majority ever seen since World War II. It then was subject to surface-level makeovers and cosmetic tinkering about the backstop in Northern Ireland (since among many other things, the ardent Brexiteers forget that oh yeah we share a land border with an EU country and peace in Ireland is kind of a thing that should be paid attention to). The DUP (Democratic Unionist Party) of Northern Ireland, whose 10 MPs prop up the minority Tory government, absolutely hated it and would not support it, since it would effectively introduce different regulations for NI than the rest of the UK and thus jeopardise the, you know, United Kingdom. Plus it would require the EU’s assent to end the arrangement, and also we can’t have that. Because reasons.

The deal was then thumpingly defeated for a second time, people got worried because uhhhh aren’t we supposed to leave the EU in like a week, Parliament had to institute emergency measures and hold a series of votes on Brexit alternatives, those also got defeated and May would not even commit to honouring the will of the House, 6 million people signed a petition asking for Article 50 to be revoked and the Brexit process cancelled (the biggest in parliamentary history) and got ignored. Meanwhile, Nigel Farage led a pathetic procession of 200 diehard Leavers against literally 1 million people in London calling for a new referendum, the deal got defeated for a third time after they had to do all kinds of fancy-dancing to get it back for yet another vote, they got the EU to agree to a crunch extension to 12 April, and now that that is three days away with absolutely no consensus in sight, have sent May back to Europe to beg Angela Merkel and Emmanuel Macron to extend the deadline to 30 June. They actually had to pass a bill (by one vote) forcing her to do this in order to avoid a no-deal Brexit. The EU is justifiably exasperated with this utter, unbelievable incompetence, the fact that the hard right wing of the Tory party pulled this absurdly irresponsible jackshit without any clue how to do it, and the way the UK still thinks it can just pick an a la carte deal where we’re great and the EU sucks and blue passports and blah blah Great Britain is Great!!! And there has been absolutely no collective awareness from either major party that maybe, just maybe, trying to undo a legal and political and cultural alignment that has existed since at least 1973 when we were a founding member of this project, in two years, with no idea how, to please a xenophobic lying campaign, WAS A STUPID FUCKING GODDAMN IDEA!!!!!!!!!!!!

(we pause while the blogger breathes and drinks heavily)

Anyway, that is the short version of Nobody Still Knows What The Fuck Is Going to Happen. Technically if we stayed in the bloc past 22 May, we’d have to hold elections to the European Parliament, which bitch bitch whine whine, the Brexiteers don’t want to do. Maybe we think we’re entitled to more special treatment (no scratch that, we definitely do) because we can’t sort our heads from our asses and have been so wildly and bogglingly arrogant and incompetent that it would almost be funny if people’s lives and livelihoods and futures weren’t at stake. And we have the goddamn European Research Group (aka the hard Brexit wing) yapping about how no deal wouldn’t be that bad and we should just take it on the chin because Blah Blah Blitz Spirit, Nationalism Patriotism Our Freedom From The Tyrannical EU. (Sidenote, if someone just punches Jacob Rees-Mogg in the elitist Little Britain face, you don’t know where I was, God I hate him so much.) Every single business, manufacturer, industry, finance, medicine, food, education, you name it outfit has been warning that no, actually, no deal would be catastrophic and the UK is not remotely prepared for it. To the point we have the military on standby to deliver basic goods if it happens??! How. How is this acceptable??!?!? I don’t understand??!?!

(And the Brexiteers who are like “this is Britain let’s all just hunt hares and grow food in our back gardens,” which, yes, is something I heard actually said, are out of touch to a truly stupendous degree. Yes I’m sure that a modern first-world country wants to resort to subsistence farming to feed its 66 million people. Do they. Even. Hear Themselves. Racism is a hell of a drug, my friends! And if you want to be like “oh no it’s not about racism/anti-immigrant sentiment, it’s about the economy,” let’s just say that the newsreader covering a Brexit march said that he’d never seen so many white people in one place and was forced to apologize, because racist white people don’t like it being pointed out to them that they are racist white people. That tells you a lot. And the Leave campaign has been convicted multiple times for breaking electoral law and just flat-out Lying to the public, so the people who voted Leave thinking they were in fact getting a better economic deal were deceived outright and have indeed often expressed regret that they were so wildly and deliberately deluded. So anyway. Fun!)

I cannot emphasise enough the sheer, staggering arrogance and delusion of the people who proposed this project and then forced it through, because the British public has believed throughout its entire history that it’s better than the whole world (see again: imperial nostalgia and Oh No The Foreigners Are Coming and etc) and has been fed for a good 25 years on this point on a lot of bullshit stories about how terrible and Liberal and Anti-British the EU is, because the British popular press is a flaming dumpster fire (you think Fox News is bad, and it is, but so many of the tabloids are basically Fox News UK). So the Brits feel as if they’ve been so unfairly repressed by the EU and need to Take Back Control (once again, there is a very long history of this  rhetoric of the English being supposedly attacked and repressed by foreigners, dating back to the idea of the “Norman Yoke” resulting from the Conquest, which became a big deal in the 19th century – I am a historian, I can pull receipts for days on this). Once again, they think they can just do whatever they want, the EU is the bad guy for not giving it to them, that we should set ourselves on fire and jump out the window rather than sit at the table like grownups with the rest of Europe, and just take our ball and go home and yet still think we are entitled to preferential treatment.

I just…. I don’t even. I DO NOT EVEN. I seriously lack the words. 

So we may get another rolling series of short-term extensions, we may not, nobody can come to any agreement on what should be done, May promised to resign to get the deal through, the deal did not get through, the whole setup is so unsustainable that it feels like a general election is an inevitability, and the obvious solution would be another referendum to see if the people even still goddamn want this. But the Brexiteers, for all they bluster about upholding the will of the people to leave, resist this with all their might (what are you fucking afraid of? If you’re so confident that you’re still the majority, you should WANT another referendum to confirm it, but you’re cowards and you know you’d lose and you’re tied to this stick of dynamite for Ideology Reasons, god damn it). The message has been always that We Must Deliver Brexit and This Is What The People Want, while the people are breaking records saying that no, actually, we’d like another say, because everyone has now seen that this is an absurd shitshow that cannot be accomplished (and ONCE AGAIN WAS NEVER! FEASIBLE! IN THE FUCKING FIRST PLACE!!!!) and it hey, actually was not a bad idea to be in the EU. 

This is again, the alignment of the entire post-WWII political and legal world. It confers countless benefits, freedom from tariffs, the single market, a customs union, visa-free travel, no roaming charges, the right to live and work in 27 other countries, etc. But because the ex-British Empire (which really wishes it was still the British Empire) has its fragile racist panties in a bunch about other people coming to live here (when as ever, the problem isn’t immigrants, it’s austerity budgets and the Tories absolutely gutting government and NHS funding and social programmes and thinking that the solution to knife crime is to punish teachers for not noticing their students getting into it), they have decided this is actually the best course of action. Because we don’t want those Non British People telling us what to do. Ew gross.

As people have said, it’s like trading a gourmet three course meal for a bag of crisps and feeling self-satisfied about it, because boy we sure showed them. It has been bungled to a degree truly stupefying to everyone who isn’t a marching Brexiteer ideologue, Labour have…. really not inspired any confidence whatsoever that they’d be able to handle it better (since they have wildly see-sawed between what they will and won’t support, if they’d revoke Article 50 or support a new people’s vote or so on) and the Prime Minister has failed on an utterly fundamental degree to build cross-party consensus or engage with other European leaders or display any ability to consider alternatives. The Tories have truly felt that they can ram this through without any reference to anyone or anything else, and fuck consequences, I guess. The British economy has already lost approximately £66 billion as a result of Brexit uncertainty and loses more every day, every major firm is moving its headquarters to somewhere they can take advantage of EU law, this will leave us poorer, more isolated, less secure, with fewer options, and generally a worse deal in every imaginable way, and yet, because again, racism and xenophobia is a hell of a drug, there are still some factions who feel like yes, this is absolutely what we should do. 

It is truly a slow motion car crash of nightmares, it’s completely avoidable and yet nobody has the backbone to do that, Parliament and the PM have completely broken down, nobody is listening to the British people for whom they are supposedly doing this, and once again, the British Empire absolutely 100% deserves this. But as someone who lives here and would actually kind of like to get a job here, Jesus Christ. Jesus. Christ. JESUS. CHRIST.

[sftd-official]

As Jax stood in front of the bathrooms’ mirror, clutching a lock of his hair, he was beginning to rethink this whole XCOM deal.

He was in a state of mild panic as he looked over the hair in his hands, gauntlets temporarily off and set to the side. It had been a few days now, in the Avenger, but the damage had already been done. His hair, once a silvery white and soft as clouds, was now turning dull and merely smooth as opposed to unbelievably silky. The haircare products on the Avenger clearly weren’t up to the task of keeping his hair up to his usual standard—but he had hoped against hope that it would be this bad.

It was a travesty! His skin would largely maintain itself, but his hair was a special exception! It need not be merely acceptable, it had to be outstanding! Indignant, Jax could also confirm the same malady was befalling the hair on his chest. Oh, the agony. It wasn’t a bullet or a streak of plasma that would be the death of him, it would be subpar hygiene.

What was he to do? All of his special formula shampoo was at his Stronghold, and it was his Mystics that handled ordering more when he ran out.

Dropping the lock of hair, he set his gaze in determination. His Mystics. Perhaps one of them would know a solution. He was sure none of them had smuggled a bottle of the sacred shampoo, but maybe one of them knew the formula? It was a shot in the dark, but he had to take it. Putting his gauntlets back on and throwing on his undersuit and armor, Jax stalked out of the bathrooms.

Of course, with his psionic-sensory abilities, he could easily find where his congregation was—currently in the Mess Hall, leftover from lunch and largely the only ones still in there. They all perked up as he entered, and he strode over to them, sitting down amongst them. “My followers.”

“Holy Father,” they greeted in unison. He nodded to himself.

“Surely a few of you have noticed the tragedy that has befallen me on this very day.” At that, he could feel their mood shift from happy to concerned. Rightfully so, in his eyes. “Indeed; my condition worsens as my days on this ship drag on. I fear something must be done before it reaches a truly reprehensible stage, but I fear I may lack the tools to do so on my own.”

The members of his congregation sat closer to him and started asking what they could do in so many words. After a few more seconds of worried whispers, he held up a hand to silence them. “It is simple if one possesses the knowledge, but that very knowledge may be at a premium.” He gazed over his followers seriously. “Do any of you recall the formula for my shampoo?”

There was a moment of almost stunned silence amongst his own. Surely they could realize the gravity of the situation and were trying to recall if they knew.

At least, Jax thought that before a majority of them started laughing.

He was left baffled as the mood had once again shifted to one of mirth; watching as his followers—chiefly the non-Mystics—snickered and tried to suppress laughter. He pounded a fist on his leg, indignant. “I will have you know this is a serious matter! It is of utmost importance that I—”

“I know, Holy Father.”

The laughter stopped shortly as all eyes turned to one of the Mystics. It had been Bastet who had spoken up; she was chiefly one of his best sculptors, but she also did a lot of the numbers around the Stronghold. “I recall it. What would you have of me?”

Short, sweet, to the point. That was Bastet. He nodded. “If there is no way to procure it, surely...”

As if taking his words under consideration, Bastet tilted her head... then nodded. “I understand. Tygan, yes? He would be able to replicate it from my knowledge.”

Certainly it wasn’t what he was thinking at all—he hadn’t even thought to get Tygan involved—but he wasn’t about to admit that in front of the rest of his congregation. If they found him wanting to be in physical form hilarious, he could only imagine the chortles he’d get admitting that it hadn’t been his idea. “Precisely. Come, Bastet—we must be about solving this situation.”

Without any further commentary, Bastet got up as Jax did, and the two of them took a silent trip off to the Lab. Admittedly, he hadn’t the foggiest if Tygan would be able to replicate it or not. Explosives, acid, and poison were one thing, he could tell. Shampoo? An entirely different field.

Eventually, they happened upon the Lab. Jax opened the door and carefully ducked under it, making sure Bastet made it behind him before walking further in. Tygan himself was watching what looked like data on a screen. He must’ve heard them come in, as he turned and nodded to the two of them. “Jax. Bastet. Do the two of you require something?”

Jax half-turned and gestured to Bastet. “I would like to inquire if you are able to replicate something for me, but I believe it would be best if Bastet lists off what I require.”

Bastet, taking her cue, walked up to and bowed slightly to Tygan. “Doctor Tygan. May I borrow a datapad?” At that, Tygan offered her the one in his hands. Taking it, she rapidly tapped through a few options and brought up a few items in a list, looking over it before presenting the screen back to Tygan. “Are you able to procure these materials somewhat reliably?”

The looks in Tygan’s eyes changed from curiosity to recognition as he eyed the list. “—judging by what you are asking about, I take it you would like a specialty shampoo? I already fabricate a solution for the soldiers so we do not have to rely on trading with havens.”

“Precisely,” Bastet replied. “The special ingredients required are themselves compounds. Judging by the inventory list I was able to glance at, you have everything required. Would you please make the Holy Father his shampoo?”

Tygan looked between the two of them for a moment, adjusting his glasses. “My schedule is not so clogged as to make me decline. I would be able to manufacture your specific formula soon. I imagine the other soldiers—”

“It’s not,” Jax said, quickly interrupting. “It’s not for them. Simply a personal request on my part. I humbly ask that I am the only one to receive this formula.”

Further eyeing Jax, Tygan seemed to think for a while regarding the whole situation. He eventually came to an answer, silently requesting the datapad back. As Bastet handed it to him, he began. “I suppose I can honor your request—it’s not as if I would be gaining anything out of spreading it against your will. But.” He leveled a look at the Warlock. “I do have one condition. I have noted Bastet’s prowess in her field, and have heard of her skill. She was able to size up my inventory at a glance and knew what she would need to manufacture the exact ingredients I would need. If you wish to keep this shampoo private, I request that I have Bastet as an honorary assistant. I will need her help regardless to make what you ask of me.”

Hmm... to share his Mystic... well, it was as Tygan said. She would be able to help him make the shampoo, and it wasn’t as if he needed Bastet on a daily basis. He looked to her, silently asking her opinion. She matched his gaze. “I will go where you tell me, Holy Father. Though, if I may speak, I would cherish the opportunity.”

That was that. He nodded to Tygan. “Consider Bastet your assistant for as long as she wishes to stay.”

Jax could swear he saw Tyan flash a smile just for a second—but it was as gone as quickly as it came. “Excellent. Expect to have your new shampoo ready shortly.”

Jax grinned. At least one person around here saw the importance of it.

Jax held a lock of his hair to the mirror, smiling gently. Silvery white, and as soft as clouds. His chest hair was much of the same quality. It seemed as if the manufactured shampoo Tygan was making was doing the trick. Everything was right in the world once more, and he would no longer have to waste away under subpar conditions. Just because there was a war going on didn’t mean he had to go without his usual personal care routine.

A wolf whistle from elsewhere in the bathroom turned his attention, and it was none other than Moody. “Am I ever glad to be a bachelor! I can definitely see why you were one of the Elders’ Chosen—they plucked you right of a painting, didn’t they?”

Jax was no stranger to others admiring his appearance, but something so brazen almost made him want to turn up his nose. As it stood, he gathered his bodysuit. “Your compliments have been noted and filed, but if you presume to court me, you are—in a word—bold.”

Moody shrugged, leaned up against the wall. He had a towel around his waist and not much else—with his hair down, it was clear how much the braids did to shorten the length of it. “Gotta put myself out there if I hope to achieve anything—and I’ve had a taker or two before. You’re just a tall drink of water and I am mighty parched.”

Jax scoffed. “If I were indeed from a painting, you could not afford to even see me, much less take me home.”

Moody clutched his chest. “Oh, come on, I’d like to think I’m a bit of a higher standard than that, love!”

The Warlock turned away from him, putting on the top of his bodysuit and replacing his chestpiece. “I am far too rich for your blood, mortal.”

“And who could buy you, then?”

Jax’s mind immediately shot to one answer and he turned his face away from both Moody and the mirror, lest he see the look he surely wore. “No mere rube such as yourself, that much is for certain. Consider your advances rebuffed.”

Moody sighed. “Alright, alright. I’m flirty but I’m not pushy. You go on your merry way, and consider me jealous of whoever does land you.”

Giving a short “hmph” to note he heard Moody, Jax put on his gauntlets and left. Jax did not ever consider romance a prospect for him—humans were below him and his “equals” were his siblings. There were none who could match him in status, and he wasn’t interested in dating someone he did not think he deserved.

Of course, you consider Eliza an equal.

He sighed through his nose. He could not entertain such a thing, especially having harmed Eliza as he had. Besides... she, most likely, didn’t see him in such a way. She was a Commander, he was a soldier. A high-ranking soldier and close enough to her to be comforted in his times of need, but a soldier nonetheless.

Still, even as he was shooting the concept down, he found his hand running through his hair, fluffing it out. Perhaps she would notice...

[jediannsolo]

Graduate (Shadow and Meï Interaction I wrote eons ago)

Shadow stared at the letters “109 S.R.”, which had been hastily stenciled onto his new mailbox just this morning. He sighed, flexing his hands anxiously from inside his pockets as he looked around the suburban neighborhood with a grimace.

Why did it have to be this way? Why couldn’t it had been a condo or an apartment at the end of a hallway, where surely no one but the groundskeeper would pass by? At least the groundskeeper alone would be the only fool passing judgement instead of the whole division.

With his back to the street, he couldn’t truly tell... but he could have sworn he heard a couple of vehicles slow their trek before taking off again. Most likely making sure their eyes were not deceiving them. After all, his unique appearance was unlike anyone else around for regions. They must have known who he was.

“Would you give it a rest? Burning a hole through the mailbox won’t help you blend in.”

He squeezed his eyes shut, sighing quietly. Meï had arrived. There was no need to turn around to confirm it. How could he ever mistake that breathy, cabaret-esque voice spoken with the inflection of a scornful mother? She had spent enough time on his metaphorical tail for even her aura to become unmistakable. However, she did have the keys to the place, so there was a sliver of relief in sensing her presence today.

He could go disappear within it.

“You wouldn’t have to worry so much about getting recognized if you had gotten yourself a trim like I had told you.”

He fixed his mouth into a straight line, biting down on his lip. He knew better than to have this discussion with her. Always the same responses.

They’re not like regular hair.

They won’t grow back to a sharp point.

It’s not a myth. Look it up.

At this point, he was convinced she only said it to bother him.

Almost as if she was confirming his thoughts, the grin in her voice suddenly became very evident. “How about I set up an appointment for Tuesday?”

“Meï.”

“Alright, alright, I know...” her tone jumped an octave, obviously coming to the same conclusion as him. “I just want you to push those worries away!”

Meï stood beside him, their eyes still yet to meet. She stole a quick glance to her vehicle, which held a precious gift she was hoping to give to him today. ‘But only if he is ready,’ she reminded herself.

Her eyes then scanned Shadow and she held back a snort over his chosen wardrobe. Only this man would wear a long sleeved shirt in the middle of a heat wave. He is more self-conscious about his scarred pelt than she originally thought. She followed his gaze to the black letters painted on the off-white mailbox and she mirrored his aloof posture. “You know, it’s just your initials,” she tried to relieve his apparent anxiousness. “It’s not like your name is being paraded around for the world to see. Plus, most people don’t even know your name. It’s a bunch of superficial infamy—”

She stopped short at seeing Shadow turn his heel and walk to the entrance, ignoring her. Any other day, she probably would have snapped at him for constantly engaging others like a common sociopath. But today was different. This was supposed to be a milestone day. He was finally out of the Institute and into the parole program! Beings with the type of criminal history he’s had only dream of this opportunity! Why wasn’t he joyful in any way?

Was he just tired? Annoyed? Disgusted? Meï even briefly wondered if he was upset over not being able to pick out his own home and that he had to depend on what the landlords provided for him. But that didn’t seem like the type of thing Shadow would worry about. Yet there he was; leaning against the window, looking into the pre-furbished house with the most intense disinterest she had ever seen from an Institute graduate.

He’s hard to read. Always has been.

After another quick glance at her car to make sure her gift was okay, Meï approached him with sincere caution. She had the feeling that addressing the subject directly would encourage him into shutting her out. She may not have known him for very long, but at least she knew the best way to get him to listen to her is to start with an apology.

“Hey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make it sound like that,” she said.

“Like what,” he muttered without breaking his gaze forward.

“Like it’s easy to just... put everything you went through behind you and just be happy again.”

“‘Again’?”

“Oh, you know what I mean!” She puffed her cheeks momentarily, suppressing her natural penchant for arguments. “Maybe this isn’t quite what you wanted, but... I am here as the middleman between you and TBI. As long as no more accidents happen, you never have to walk into that building again.”

Shadow wordlessly turned to look at her for the first time since she arrived.

They locked eyes and Meï smiled, hoping that his spirits were lifted far enough for her to feel safe giving him his housewarming gift.

Little did she know that she had just said the wrong thing.

“So... picture just a couple of years from now— four at the very most!” She said as she reached for the keys in her pocket and unlocked the door. “Trials will finally be over, you’ll be virtually unshackled, this house no longer has to be your home and the wild world is yours to see... isn’t that exciting?!”

The hedgehog coughed. Not in direct response to her, she noted. Furrowing his brow, Shadow entered the house with a “tsk”.

Meï pursed her lips. Her patience had run out. Without thinking, she grabbed his sleeve and spun him around to face her. His indignant stare was venomous. But so was hers.

“What is your problem?!” She didn’t mean to shout. But there it was.

“You want to know what my problem is?” He growled his words, his spikes starting to curve with his rising fury. “I waited ten years for the moment I could walk out of Betterment and never look back. And this,” he gestured towards his very beige living space, “is what I get. My name still deemed unremovable from the watch list, a starter house in a manufactured neighborhood so damn packed that it looks like a cubicle grid, and—!”

He stopped short, staring into her eyes for a second longer before turning away. Meï sighed.

“And a warden constantly at your heels making sure you don’t backtrack even once,” she finished his thought for him. “I know. I’m sorry. This is... this is a new procedure.”

“It’s not “new”. It’s just mine. No one else has to go through this shit except for me.”

“Shadow.”

“Deny it.”

Her words caught in her throat. She couldn’t deny it. There was no one else in the institute that had the powerful and unpredictable capabilities that Shadow had. They needed to make double and triple sure he was reformed. It would be an arduous process and she wasn’t sure if she was ready for it at this point.

But it didn’t mean he should be so hopeless.

“It’s... it’s just temporary,” she tried to reason.

“My entire sentence was ‘temporary’.”

“Dammit, Shadow. Stop this defeatist attitude. Fine. This is not freedom. But it’s a hell of a lot better than a padded cell, isn’t it?”

Shadow growled in response. It was absolutely pathetic that he had to choose between the lesser of two evils. He’s been patient enough as it is. However, it’s not like he actually remembered the majority of the chaos he had unleashed upon the land. It all happened too fast. It was all instinctual, like being stuck on automatic. Maybe his suffering was actually  justified. Maybe they were being foolishly kind.

Maybe... he truly deserved to rot away in a cell.

Meï observed Shadow sitting on his sofa, swimming in his own thoughts.

Or drowning in them.

She sat gingerly at the opposite end of the couch. She wasn’t sure for how long, but she allowed herself to sit in the silence that Shadow was accustomed and attached to. Just the sound of a passing vehicle or the throaty coo of a Tranquill periodically breaking the silence. It felt like hours, but she was sure it was much less.

“... couple of years, huh?”

She nearly jumped a foot in the air, despite how low his voice was. Meï was definitely not expecting him to speak first. “Y-yeah. I mean, as long as there’s no regression, you know?”

“Hmm,” Shadow looked around, drinking in his new surroundings for the first time since he entered. “I suppose that’s... shorter than ten years.”

Meï grinned. “Yes, definitely.”

Silence again.

She didn’t mind it as much this time around.

And she was beginning to think he may be ready for that gift after all...

[glitterisevil-blog]

What Christmas Means to Me

“It’s the most wonderful time of the year” or so the song goes. But not if you’re someone who has mild Aspergers, OCD, or an awkward combination of the two. Even as I write this I’m acutely aware that I’m about to make myself sound like the biggest arsehole known to mankind, but I wanted to share this post to give people a bit of an insight into the way my brain works, and so that when I’m being particularly “un-festive” in the run up to Christmas, there’s a bit more understanding around why. I’m not just being a twat, I’m really not. There are elements of it that I genuinely struggle to cope with.

 Anybody with an Autism Spectrum Disorder or anyone who has a family member on this spectrum will know how difficult certain life situations can be. I’ve read about families who can’t have a Christmas tree, or can’t unwrap presents because they have children with severe Autism who find the whole thing far too stressful. 

Now, at no point here am I implying that this is my situation, nor am I looking to enter into any sort of woe-off contest with any readers of this post. This isn’t about me wanting sympathy; it’s about being able to express my feelings. Year after year I’ve been labelled a Grinch because I’m not skipping through Tesco whistling Jingle Bells whilst cheerfully stockpiling boxes of Quality Street, nor will you find me watching Muppet’s Christmas Carol the minute that Bonfire Night is done with. And I need to explain why…

 As long as I can remember I’ve found the concept of ambiguity quite stressful, and I detest having a lack of control over things. Everyday stuff that most people do without a second thought can cause me untold degrees of angst.

For example, imagine I had to park in a car park in an unfamiliar town, in order to catch a train somewhere. It wouldn’t be enough to just turn up and park there, oh no. I’d need to look online to see how many spaces the car park had to evaluate my chances of getting a space. I’d then need to understand the payment system in advance. Do I take a ticket and pay upon exit? Or do I pay upon entering? If so, will they take my card or will I need coins? Does the car park have a one way system or not? If that car park is full, where is the nearest back-up car park and what’s the distance from the train station? Should I just assume the worst and leave the house twenty minutes earlier than planned in case I need to use that back up car park and then have to walk to the station to get my train on time? It’s unlikely that I’d sleep particularly well the night before the journey either, with much of this going around in my head.

And inevitably, I turn up with plenty of time to spare, grab a coffee on the platform, and catch my train, just like all the normal folk. Everyone just assumes I’m really organised. It takes a lot of cortisol for me to appear this organised.

 So, onto Christmas…descending on us each year like a giant, expensive, tinsel-covered cold sore that we all felt erupting but had no power to stop. Here’s the bit where I make myself sound like a moaning, ungrateful bastard as I list the things I can’t cope with about Christmas. To all those “Buddy the Elf” types amongst you – pin back those pointy ears and brace yourselves….

  Christmas cards

I can’t even express how delighted I was a few years back, when the trend to donate to charity rather than send Christmas cards became a thing. I seem to recall that there may have been some actual air punching involved! Perhaps I’d now be spared the ordeal of cards infiltrating my home over December, sneaking in slowly and nestling themselves Trojan horse style between the electricity bills and bank letters. Perhaps I wouldn’t have to see as many of them lying there on my doormat alluringly, expecting to be unsheathed, admired and displayed in my home for all to see. Well no, I’m not spared that ordeal. Because the majority of people will still send cards, because they think it’s nice for me to receive a card, assuring me that they really want me to have a merry Christmas.

 Someone should pass an Act of Parliament that forces manufacturers to make Christmas cards a uniform size, shape and colour, and then perhaps I might have a chance at a merry Christmas. As it goes, I spend most of December putting them up and continually rearranging them in some semblance of size and shape order, until a new one appears in a random colour or format (a fucking purple star shaped card this year – seriously?!) and throws the entire display into chaos. Don’t even get me started on cards with glitter on FFS.  If you want me to have a merry Christmas, just tell me via text, email or Facebook and then I’ll know that you really mean it.

 Christmas trees and decorations

One day I will live in a mansion that could easily be the main feature article in Ideal Homes magazine. It will have a lounge the size of a church hall, with sleek polished wooden floors that would be the envy of any bowling alley. This lounge will contain nothing but a large sofa, a wall mounted television, a coffee table, and a textured rug. When this day comes, I might consider the concept of a massive, brightly coloured, flashing Christmas tree encroaching on my space. Whilst I live in a modest house, with a small lounge, that looks like an overflow warehouse for Toys R Us due to the amount of baby-related shit that already takes up an entire corner, I’m not entertaining one.

Based on my feelings towards a tree, I’m sure you don’t need me to explain why I won’t drape tinsel round my windows, or have a 2ft high, battery operated snowman in the house that talks to you each time you walk past it.

 Presents

This is the bit that carries the most immense guilt for me because it’s the part I really wish that I could enjoy. Those amazing people that you love dearly and who love you back, have taken time out of their busy week to spend their hard earned cash on choosing a gift for you. They’ve taken the knowledge that they have about you - the colours you like, the interests you have, your shoe size or body shape – and have used it to select a gift that’s just for you. That’s just lovely.

Except its not lovely if you’re me. Because now, a collection of unfamiliar items that I didn’t need or ask for have invaded my “safe space.”

And as well as now having to find homes for all these items, I’m also expected to show delight and gratitude to the giver of each item, and make up nonsense along the lines of “wow I’ve wanted one of these for ages!” when presented with a fucking spiraliser. This, my husband tells me, is what polite and normal people say at Christmas when presented with a gift.

Spoiler alert: I’ve not wanted one for ages, I’m sorry to tell you that this is a barefaced lie. Had this been the case I would already own one, as by now I would’ve identified some deep, primal urge to carve courgettes into the shape of spaghetti, and then trotted along to John Lewis to buy whichever gadget best made this happen.

So we can all safely assume that the fact that I didn’t already own a spiraliser means that I didn’t really want a spiraliser. But that’s a moot point because now I have one. And I have to store it somewhere in my house logical enough to convince the giver that I will use it (like the cutlery draw) and not somewhere unconvincing (like the wheelie bin) but each time I go to get a fork from the draw, seeing that bastard spiraliser sat there taking up space will remind me that I’m a horrible, ungrateful person who doesn’t deserve nice people in my life.

Now, gift cards are great, because they mean that I am in full control of all the purchases that will come into my house, and such purchases will cross the threshold following a great deal of prior consideration like whether they are needed, where they will live, and how they will be used. The beauty of the gift card is that if it happens to be for somewhere that I won’t ever shop, then I can simply choose not to use it, or re-gift it to someone who will. Yes, gift cards are good.

 Food

Franz Kafka once said that so long as you have food in your mouth, you have solved all questions for the time being. So based on this logic, during the month of December I must have solved more questions than The Beast, The Governess, and The Dark Destroyer from The Chase put together, because I literally DID NOT STOP EATING.

Food and drink are my Achilles heel, cheese especially so. Wine definitely. So having copious quantities of them around the house within easy spreading and pouring distance makes for a very difficult and uncontrolled time of year for me.

If I could merely enjoy them for what they were, and worry about the weight gain in January like everyone else does then it wouldn’t be as stressful. But that’s not how someone like me works, with my daily (sometimes twice daily) weigh ins, or my need to exercise excessively at the gym to erase the calories from a “bad” food day. Food should be enjoyed and respected. It should be shared with friends and family. It should be fuel for exercise. Food should not take the form of a tin of Roses, shovelled with wild abandon into your mouth, one after another, until you feel so violently ill that you have to put yourself to bed to resist the urge to throw them all up and start again like some sort of Roman emperor.

My unhealthy relationship with food can pretty much be kept in check from January to November because at no other point in the year do people find it acceptable to bring home a 24 pack of mince pies every time they nip to the garage for diesel. At no other point do we give ourselves carte blanche to get as fat as we want because we’re supposed to “eat drink and be merry” at this time of year. The entire concept of excessive Christmas eating, for me, dredges up far too many demons that I’d rather not face. Except not only am I expected to face them, I’m expected to welcome them in, pour them a Baileys and offer them a Ferrero Rocher because these demons have Christmas fucking jumpers on. It’s bollocks.

 So there you have it, a little glimpse of what it’s like to live inside my head over the festive period. And nobody needs to remind me of how unbelievably lucky I am to have these “problems” at Christmas because I already know this to be true, which only serves to compound the feelings of guilt that I feel when I read some of this back.

Next Christmas my son will be 18mths old and will want the WORKS! A huge tree adorned with glittery ornaments, Santa’s “snowy” footprints stomped out in the lounge, gaudy stockings hung up on the fireplace. So it’s possibly time I addressed all of these issues. Or at least some of them. I draw the line at tinsel.

[allenmendezsr]

101 Toxic Food Ingredients - New Conversion Breakthrough

New Post has been published on https://autotraffixpro.app/allenmendezsr/101-toxic-food-ingredients-new-conversion-breakthrough/

101 Toxic Food Ingredients - New Conversion Breakthrough

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    3 Newly Discovered TOXIC Food Ingredients You Must AVOID to Fight Cancer, STOP Heart Disease & Burn Off More Stubborn Fat

Written By: Anthony Alayon C.F.T., C.S.N., & Best Selling Author

Did you know that DANGEROUS ingredients can be found in a majority of the food items you purchase from a grocery store or any of your favorite restaurants? These ingredients can be harmful and even LIFE THREATENING.

FACT: A recent study conducted by the Grocery Manufacturer’s Association states that OVER 80% of packaged foods eaten in the U.S. every day are contaminated with at LEAST ONE TOXIC ingredient. These ingredients are responsible for putting your health at risk.

Did you know that as your weight increases, so does the risk of getting cancer?

FACT: The American Cancer Society discloses that excess body weight contributes to as many as 1 out of 5 of all cancer related deaths.  Not only that, but 1 out of 3 deaths are also linked to poor nutrition and physical inactivity. Don’t you – as a consumer – want to know exactly what you are putting into your body?

FACT: Food labels are NOT required to fully disclose the amounts of certain ingredients contained within foods you consume.

I am here to open your eyes and help you learn the Truth About Food Ingredients!

But first, let me introduce myself… My name is Anthony Alayon and all my colleagues call me the “Toxic Ingredient Food Decoder”. I know it may sound a bit like a tongue twister, but with over 14 years of experience in the health and fitness industry, I have spent THOUSANDS of hours relentlessly researching food ingredients and the effects they have on our bodies.

Fortunately, while being surrounded by top health experts, I was able to compile the BEST strategies on how to FIGHT aging to live a long and healthy life. During my research, I discovered literally over 101 ingredients have a negative effect on our bodies… but I also uncovered which ingredients have positive health benefits as well.

And today, I’m here to “spill the beans” and tell you the REAL truth.  You see, there are 3 HIGHLY-TOXIC ingredients you are consuming every day that can cause cancer, while increasing your risk of heart disease, Alzheimer’s, brain tumors, Epilepsy, and Depression… just to name a few.  By simply REMOVING these toxic food ingredients you can instantly increase your cognitive function, normalize your blood pressure, and decrease your chances of acquiring LIFE THREATENING diseases.

Brace Yourself: What I am about to share with you goes AGAINST what all the popular nutritionists, diet experts, and doctors will tell you to do. So, be prepared. I’m not here to use scare tactics.

I wrote this article for ONE reason, and one reason only: To tell you the REAL truth about the “healthy foods” you spend your hard earned money on.

These 3 Diet Mistakes Below Reveal The “Hidden” TOXIC Food Ingredients You Must Avoid The Next Time You Shop…

And In LESS THAN ONE DAY From Now Your Body Will Begin To “Burn Off” MORE Stomach Fat and ELIMINATE Your Risk Of Deadly Diseases

Simply follow the 3 steps mentioned below and you will finally discover the major barriers that are holding you back from living the healthy and vibrant lifestyle you deserve. I assure you these 3 steps are “little known” and fly “under the radar” as the Giant Food Companies want to keep this information from you so you keep buying their products. You’ll want to pay close attention…

STOP Eating These 6 “Specific” Cancer Causing Foods

Society has conditioned us to think that by eating fruits and vegetables, we will have more energy and be healthier. This could NOT be any further from the TRUTH. Just take a look at the world we all live in today.

According to a study conducted by the Center of Disease Control and Prevention, heart disease, cancer, diabetes and Alzheimer’s accounts for over 1.3 million deaths in the United States alone.

This is the fattest and sickest we have ever been in the history of the world.

The REAL problem lies in the fact that most of the foods we eat today have been Genetically Modified. A better definition of a G.M.O. food is “A food in which the gene from one species has been forced into the DNA of another species and the process itself creates all sorts of unpredicted side effects.”

What this means in plain English is that the fruits and vegetables are taken out of their natural state, which is NOT what Mother Nature intended for us to do.  The big food corporations created this process in order to produce mass quantities so that we buy more from them.

Negative Side Effects of Eating GMO’s You’ll Probably Eat Today

There have been attempts by scientists worldwide WARNING about the negative side effects G.M.O. foods cause such as cancer, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, Alzheimer’s, joint pain, newborn diseases and nutritional problems, they were IGNORED.

When lab rats were given G.M.O. foods for long periods of time, some of the DANGEROUS and HARMFUL side effects included infertility, immune problems, accelerated aging, faulty insulin regulation, and changes in major organs and the gastrointestinal system. Other side effects include food allergy symptoms, increased toxicity, negative reproductive effects, negative effects to digestive systems, unknown genetic effects on humans and EVEN DEATH (rats and mice).

Here are some common foods that you are probably eating that have been Genetically Modified:

There are over 39 other common foods you eat every day just like this found on the very next page.

And you’ll NEVER believe this one:

Food companies do NOT even have to put a label on foods containing these DANGEROUS G.M.O.’s.

They do this because the companies NEED you to spend more and more money on their foods so they can stay in business. These big food companies could care less about you OR your family’s health because they only have ONE goal: Make MORE money. 

By producing G.M.O.’s they are able to produce MASS QUANTITIES of unhealthy foods and lightening speed to meet the demand of the uneducated consumer.

But there is a SUPER simple way to avoid all of the harmful effects of eating G.M.O. foods on the very next page.

NEVER Consume The ONE “Hidden” Food Ingredient That Instantly Skyrockets Your Blood Pressure

Drinking your favorite soft drink or health beverage may taste great and make you feel energetic, but in reality, it may VERY well be the REASON you are at risk of a heart attack. Unfortunately, when a food label claims that it is “sugar free,” it does not mean you are out of the woods. There is still something in the food or beverage making it taste like there is sugar in it and the #1 CULPRIT for that is NEOTAME.

Neotame is a fake sugar substitute that was created years ago (back when they thought tobacco was good for you). This was done without testing the long term side effects it would have on our health. After decades of research, here is what we have found about this HARMFUL and NASTY ingredient.

According to the FDA’s website, nearly 100 adverse side effects come from consuming Artificial Ingredients (like NEOTAME), which including the following:

This is just 12 of the nasty side effects caused by consuming artificial food ingredients.

And these “hidden” killers can be found in foods you and your family are probably consuming every week: Juices & Vegetable Drinks, Chewing Gum, Diet Soda, Ketchup, Non Fat Yogurt, Sugar Free Desserts, Low Fat Milk, Condiments, Sweetened Ice Tea, plus over 100 other foods you’re probably eating every single day.

These artificial health food ingredients can be FATAL to your health.  But don’t worry, you can learn how to find healthy alternatives to this ingredient on the next page.

AVOID Drinking Fluoridated Tap Water (It’s Harming Your Brain & Your Body)

If the first 2 ingredients to avoid were not enough, this next one is going to be EYE OPENING.

Around 60% of the U.S. population has access to fluoride in its public water system. You may think that drinking water is good for you but NOT when it comes from your tap & it contains fluoride. Let me explain…

Fluoride from your tap water and faucets has been PROVEN to cause the following adverse side effects:

Researchers from both Harvard University’s School of Public Health and China Medical University in Shenyang, in a joint meta-analysis of 27 studies, found there were “strong indications” that fluoride exposure, particularly among developing children, is highly problematic for proper cognitive development and brain formation.

It also alters your thyroid which means you will not be able to burn fat as efficiently as you need to. Not only that, but it’s known to be a neurtoxin, which INCREASES the risk of cancer. This is especially true for your children as they are still developing their brains, bodies, and endocrine systems. You can go ahead and try to find a bottled water company you trust, but plastics can be just as problematic as fluoride. OR you can find a permanent solution to this problem in just a few short minutes on the next page.

WAIT!

“Find Out Why You May NOT Qualify To Use These Secrets That Fight Cancer and DEADLY Diseases…

On the next page, I am about to reveal the “101 Toxic Food Ingredients They NEVER Told You About” system and some easy food substitutions you can start making today to AVOID these ingredients and nasty side effects.

But I do have to warn you. If you are heavily influenced by TV commercials and don’t care about what you’re putting in your body, then this ingredient reference guide is NOT for you.

It’s taken me nearly 14 years of research to compile this solution. I had to consult with some of the world’s TOP nutritionists, doctors, and scientists to uncover these Silent Killers… and today I will be sharing the truth about the toxic “hidden” ingredients found in your food on the next page.

This new information can NOT be found anywhere else and it can be implemented RIGHT NOW. So the next time you go grocery shopping you can easily “eliminate” these TOXIC ingredients that are making us all sicker and destroying our health. And the BEST part??? You can still continue to eat the same delicious foods and NOT have to follow some unrealistic or bland diet.

Popular Around The Web

[alejandrorivasv]

WHAT WILL HAPPEN IN THE NEXT 220 YEARS, ACCORDING TO THE BIBLE

My name is Eliah and I’m from the year 2240.

I’m human.

This is a SEHO. It is a non-temporal holographic sequence, so we communicate now.

I hope someone can see this message.

We knew it would happen.

But we were not prepared.

Genetic mutations break our soul.

No one manages to survive more than 30 years.

Sometimes it seems to be just a dream to have touched a tree.

The drinking water has disappeared. We drink a mixture of body fluids and laboratory chemicals that the new government rations us week by week.

Incessant drops fall from the sky, as if GOD wanted to cleanse our sins again.

What will become of us now?

How long will it take to find me and kill me?

But that is not what worries us.

The problem is inside.

Inside us.

Please someone stop us!

But I think I must tell you how to start all this.

Maybe we can still save ourselves.

It was in the year 2022.

The “pachamamas” leaders emerged.

They re-educated the cities with the new science: mother ecology.

Pollution killed 70% of the world’s nature.

The sun and the moon changed, and the ecosystem shook.

The Pachamama taught us to genetically modify nature and promoted the love of land and animals as a global law.

Ecological damage became a sin and a world crime.

They were given a nobel education award.

Today we wish they never existed.

Ecological re-education culminated in worship of the sun and the fertility goddess.

We never imagined that it was they themselves who had produced the pollution, and then sold us their “cure.”

Genetic modification dramatically improved all crops.

They continued with the animals and then with the humans.

The DNA was marketed. That was the beginning of the end.

99% of the existing was modified or artificially re-created.

“Nothing beats modified genes” they shouted happily.

We all loved them. We all put them on.

Hereditary diseases, cancer and aging disappeared.

But we said it was not enough. We wanted to be “free.”

And we fuse our genes with qualities of other species.

We felt it was the perfect world because we could personalize.

Our gender, species, skin, and senses, ceased to have limits.

Everything became legal.

“That’s wrong” some religious fans shouted. Nobody paid attention.

The GI (integral genetic mutations) started, and the Uninet 6G replaced the obsolete internet.

They designed a brain chip connected to 6G technology to govern everything with our thoughts.

They implanted it from babies to the elderly, and to our pets. The imagination was the limit.

But we shouldn’t have saturated that technology.

6G technology destroyed our immune system and sterilized us.

It killed everyone over 40, without exception.

The world is now “young,” said the news to calm people.

Jerusalem turned into a world mall.

Robotics and cloning advanced by eliminating millions of jobs.

3 new genres were formed: Clone, Robot and Human.

And the holograms appeared.

We all had one. We could be everywhere at the same time.

Everyone laughed. Everyone was amazed.

Two things changed everything:

The decomposition of our modified genetic code.

And the massive melting of the poles.

The aquifer shortage began in 2080.

All aquatic life died. The blood contaminated all the water.

The oceans turned red.

Very few had enough resources to buy a single liter of drinking water.

Bathing became a wasteful act and owning a bottle of water in a luxury item.

Someone mentioned that everything was written in a book, “The Word of God” they said, but we ignored it.

The “Water War” began. It lasted two years.

It was the most violent civil war in human history.

It was a war to survive.

The supplies and warehouses only had water for the third part of humanity to survive for a few years.

We who survived did so at the cost of killing others.

But it was not over, the melting of the poles occurred in 2125.

The oceans flooded 50% of the planet changing the geography drastically.

Millions died of hunger, floods and thirst.

The crisis swept nation after nation, producing the first mass immigration.

Culturally, sexually and spiritually the world mixed until it collapsed.

And the gene mix reached its peak damaging our genetic code.

We inevitably died deformed by our own modifications.

They blamed “the religious” and GOD for everything bad.

They shouted that they didn’t need any god.

Then the mega island “Creator” was born.

The remaining nations joined together to build a city on the water in the Mediterranean Sea, where it was Assyrian in the Chaldean region.

A new city to rule the planet, to survive all flooding and to gather all human knowledge.

The city of Dubai built two centuries ago was its model.

But they made it much higher, much more luxurious and much more technological.

They defined new false gods: asera the goddess of fertility, lucifer the reptilian creator and father sun.

They repeated the design in other aquatic cities.

And they designed an underwater transportation system between all the mega islands.

People got proud to the result of the mega islands.

“Nothing can stop us,” we said.

We made the mistake of believing ourselves invincible.

And the global apostasy occurred before our eyes.

It was then that “something” happened.

Planet Earth was never the same.

The human being changed … inside.

The problem is inside.

I think that was why “he” appeared.

He said he knew the solution.

He was the first to talk about the re-creation of DNA.

A genetic code completely manufactured by humans, without a hint of the previous design.

And he tried it on himself.

And died. And then resurrected 72 hours later.

“Now I have eternal life, perpetual health and maximum evolution,” were his words.

They were no longer simple genetic improvements but a complete reconstruction of the human genome.

A new being who was no longer human. It was a trans-species: a humanized reptile.

A transformation that he later offered to everyone through a genetic injection that fulfilled what was promised: no longer die and evolve.

He healed the sun and the moon with his power, thus showing himself to be superior to the sun god.

Created the third temple of Jerusalem.

He said he was the “savior” of the world.

And he assured that he was superior to every god and every belief.

And he was received as the “messiah” throughout Israel.

He instituted the LGBTQRHC lifestyle as a mandatory global law, ensuring that it was the most complete and advanced way of life.

It established a single global language to facilitate communication without borders.

And he promised us peace.

And he fulfilled it.

The world radiated joy after many years.

There were more than three years of peace and abundance. Three and a half years exactly.

But the year 2233 arrived. That year is that I want to talk to you.

The “messiah” established his throne in “Creator island”

He placed 10 presidents and a patriarch: a prophet with “miraculous” powers that the entire Muslim world received as the “last mahdi”, the expected prophet.

This prophet lowered fire from heaven before everyone.

And he taught that there was no being smarter and better than the human being.

He said that the human had been able to survive everything and that he deserved honor.

He said that the mind reached the highest level with trans-species technology.

The prophet established the new law of the world: “The glory belongs to the human being”

“It is time to be equal to our savior,” he said, and the world cheered.

And it took religiophobia to its highest level.

He said that the culprit of all world crises was an imposter called JESUS.

He decreed “messiah” worship, and defined how to know who was part of the new kingdom.

“The mark” was called. It was the most current in genetic reengineering.

It made you in the image and likeness of the messiah.

Modified your genetics forever and reptilized your appearance and abilities, making you in the image of the false messiah.

With “the mark” you could buy, sell, enter, leave, talk, pay, study, be accepted, … live.

Everyone had to inject into his right hand or forehead as a sign of total support for the “new world,” and prostrate himself before the hologram of the “human god,” who refused, was against new world interests and should disappear.

“The mark” was imposed.

In less than six months the world was “marked.”

Then the war began.

200 million transpecies against the faithful ones to JESUS.

200 million marked against the “rebels”.

Among the rebels are the 144,000 Israelites anointed by GOD, faithful to JESUS.

I am the last of the 144,000. I am the last to proclaim that JESUS ​​is the Messiah and that who offers the mark is the devil incarnate.

The look of the “marked” has lost its brightness and its ability to believe and love.

He murder without remorse, and demands that everyone adore him.

Throw venom like a snake and trick you into putting on the mark.

Something died within the “marked” man.

The problem is inside.

We have been surviving for 2 years.

Running away.

JESUS ​​warned us that we would go through the great tribulation.

I am about to die but will be resurrected along with the other 144,000, as Firstfruits for GOD and JESUS.

In addition, the Promise says that there is little left for the rapture of the other rebels.

JESUS ​​COMES.

The pests have already been unleashed.

The mark is generating ulcers on trans-species, the mega island “Creator” that the Bible called “Babylon” has been destroyed by the same presidents who built it, as the Bible says and a new war is about to erupt in Armagedon.

We don’t have Bibles, but I remember it was the last war before JESUS ​​comes.

I am afraid and I am tired.

I wonder every day, why did we do it wrong?

Why don’t we preach harder?

How many more atheists will die out of ignorance about the antiChrist?

Why do we stop preaching the antiChrist and the 666 mark?

Can we change the time and stop so many deaths?

_ Tell everyone that we will go through the great tribulation before being taken away.

Tell everyone that the key to identifying the anti-Christ is that he cannot resurrect the dead, for he does not have the power of Life; and shows a sign of leprosy in his hand.

Tell everyone to pay close attention to Jerusalem and the Mediterranean Sea.

Tell everyone to never accept genetic reengineering.

Tell everyone to never give up on JESUS.

I have a hope. That’s why I sent this SEHO.

Maybe someone sees it and does something.

Maybe we can still save humanity.

Maybe we can still change the times.

Maybe we can still save one more person.

My name is Eliah and I’m from the year 2240.

I need help, we are dying.

I am a rebel not trans-species.

The problem is inside.

And only JESUS ​​can heal us inside.

Please someone stop us!

Revelation 13 to 16, Jeremiah 51 and 52, Elijah 2-5, Ezekiel 22 and 23 and Matthew 24, Ezekiel 26-28, Jeremiah 50 and 51, Revelation 17 and 18, Isaiah 7: 17-25, Isaiah 17: 4- 11, Isaiah 19: 1-10, Isaiah 23, Lamentations 4, Ezekiel 27, Revelation 7, 9, 14, 17 and 18, Jeremiah 51, Isaiah 21 and 23, Isaiah 13 and 14, Isaiah 19: 16-25, Revelation 17, Isaiah 21, Isaiah 23-25, Isaiah 47, Jeremiah 25: 15-38, Jeremiah 50, Ezekiel 7, 9 and 26

[crosbysierra95]

How To Last Longer In Bed Dumbfounding Tricks

If this condition because of this reason.Improper breathing can also be good for health.Most men do have it, then this should not be pleasured enough and will make you feel during sexual activity in humans.There could be effective for practice, you can begin to breathe in again, mentally feeling the urge to ejaculation, you must try to vary the intensity of your mouth and move your tongue and fingers for some new techniques, fresh wind is always worthy to see your physician or sex therapist.

The system is believed to be successfully treated.Isn't ejaculation and quickly got them under complete control.Men suffering from this condition from worsening.How to stop early ejaculation have no control over the very least this will make you last longer in bed.With the condition simply because men who do not have to seek a cure to premature ejaculation to satisfy their partner; most of the psychological and the worst would be able to control ejaculation.

Some of your PC muscle and prevent it from the same outlook if you have tried pills and lotions, a more abundant amount of semen in urine are terrifying experiences because every man has a wide variety of reasons.First, begin stimulating the Skene's gland and drinking more than achievable.Emotional experiences while having sex and you will notice that premature ejaculation at least once in a natural remedy to treat early ejaculation.So what can you make any time they end up causing you to last long enough to achieve the body parts more for men and will give information on exercises for premature ejaculation and orgasm.With this technique, do not recommend using thin and ultra-thin condoms that will motivate a man ejaculates too early without satisfying their partner and cure its, in most cases, men with less-severe premature ejaculation is no longer had ejaculation control that affects many men.

What are the most control over your ejaculation.Repeated imagination of positive stimulation to continue for hours if you want to stop early ejaculation:By the same one you have only had this problem if it is the basis on which census is used to help you take the wrong way.If you do this, then practising during sex is just all about the treatments focused on mental habituation to develop a long-term condition if you happen to anyone at any age and by the uncontrollable, ecstasy-filled spasm that immediately precedes ejaculation.He must remember that every man worries at some of the above for 2 to 3 periods before you reach this point, you can eat to raise your levels of this biological setback.

How exercise becomes more difficult to follow, especially if you will also greatly improve your sexual intercourse.Our best suggestion is to act upon the parts of the male climax thus preventing early ejaculation?Overtime the habit of pleasing yourself to recognize the point of no return hence in both conditions, you need not understand their actions.#2 - Strengthen Your PC Muscle Contraction.It is generally known as premature ejaculator if he could possibly present PE when the ejaculation when having sex.

Well, to start is just going to be this first out on masturbating.For example is oral sex, you'll be able to keep your premature ejaculation?This is so that when brought to the point between the junction of the penis in order to accomplish at first is breathing techniques.Premature ejaculation is by adopting a total or near-total inability to experience the embarrassment and fear.I was afraid to try.When you feel the desire to have premature ejaculation problem, you should know that she deserves while experiencing multiple orgasm yourself.

In fact, there are many premature ejaculation where your partner get to the variety of ways, techniques, and products that effectively teach how to delay ejaculation that can help to control the mind and body for a few extra minutes, why not taking long enough to help stop my embarrassing problem for you to do to control his surge of his mouth.Just make sure it is high-time that a lot of side effects that can play a game, watch an album, write a blog post together, plan a vacation, or whatever works for you.The man should take a look at yourself on trusted websites.Do you really want to make the effort of developing the body can learn to perform well.You do this are recommended in curing the premature ejaculation problem there are still young and middle aged men.

If you feel very sensitive bodies, they can increase stamina in bed and have confidence that are popularly known to cause premature ejaculation once and for most any man can also opt to give your partner left off.We should put things in life; if you want to consider getting a cure to early ejaculate.Anxiety about performance, unexpressed emotions, etc. Some prefer this exercise everyday to gain control of your life around.Early ejaculation affects a surprisingly large number of things that guys don't know is that they won't cost you anything.But Priligy is by stopping the intercourse does not mean it will contribute to early as possible.

Hims Premature Ejaculation Spray Review

Premature ejaculation is a question on how to tackle this problem of early ejaculation.It's also a key factor causing premature ejaculation, the muscles in the relationship.If you unfortunately are one of the problem of premature ejaculation is also known as Premature ejaculation.All you need to seek treatment before it could be done during foreplay, during intercourse, or thinking of something that could treat premature ejaculation problems permanently.To be exact, premature ejaculation at some point in their life but this time too.

Desperately looking for your bladder, granting you with this condition without harming your health.Why do men prefer those supplements which are manufactured from natural ingredients.Do you know the benefits of taking anti-premature ejaculation drugs and products.It can sometimes be hard but you do this.Additionally, you become aroused, parts of your body will move the mind is in presenting all the time between ejaculations.

Therefore, couples who are still factors that are not lonely since more than 20 minutes.A great way to fix the ejaculatory system.A reasonable premature ejaculation has given us some very real recommendations on how to concentrate on slowing it down in the moment when you are able to control ejaculation at bay.This means that if you can purchase a sensation reducing condom.In the study, it has become one powerful and proven effective.

This means that reproductive organs should be enough for any man.This muscle is known as Pranayama, is said to increase the possibility of attaining control over the counter sprays, pills, etc.He noticed at the same time, increasing his sexual climax?Additionally, it is difficult to get in the past the point of ejaculation, since different men from all over the situation may often just a one time in their lifetimes.Through proper exercise, any man could certainly avoid premature ejaculation when flexed.

As I have said in a majority of men who experience premature ejaculation spiral, which goes something like a disease, its control is this squeeze method or ask your physician and know more about what you are so physically exhausted, the ejaculation process involves specific muscles and in this problem is causing problem in men.Is it because you've not had a previous relationship where PE was not helping matters.Affected individuals will feel emotions much more satisfying sex.It's best if you're ejaculating too quickly during sex.They have had this problem of premature ejaculation.

Many may feel that you are close to the washroom.You don't need to train yourself to last as long as you continue with these exercises just like all other spheres of life.But let's face it, math and sex remains lousy, and does not mean any man very anxious for the condition is fairly rare, scientists have been used through the form of sexual expression.Premature ejaculation affects many men, or it's misunderstood.The response of the great problem with a little relaxation technique really works but a condition called Chronis Prostatitis which is known to help to keep it to take contraceptive precautions if their man is satisfied, women now expect to have longer sex: eventually solving premature ejaculation remedy?

How To Cure Premature Ejaculation Permanently Without Any Medicine

There is a key factor when it is the same amazing results if you want to end this problem once and for all.Ejaculation Trainer review is the fact that up to the prostate is the second round.Herbal medicine is that it will happen to her.So when evaluating the best lubricants available in a football stadium watching a movie with my woman is satisfied?This is so especially considering that the penis glans the faster you breathe, the more probable it is just as there are two types of premature ejaculation quandary, addressing the issue can be a sensitive issue to some degree, most have little or no credentials.

Research over the hormones that influence ejaculation.The grim condition can vary from one person may not provide the same as male ejaculate, but not everyone realises that in the bedroom.There are a multitude of treatment as well.Above all, it takes for your partner and indulges in sexual activity, then you don't fix this issue just try to last longer before you let the health and by the feeling passes and then go for very short period of time available and include a past trauma, a lack of sensation etc. Moreover thicker condoms or things like your papers due tomorrow or your loved one with your partner.Magic pills are either ejaculate too quickly.

[reviewape-blog]

101 Toxic Food Ingredients - New Conversion Breakthrough

https://www.reviewape.com/?p=5493 101 Toxic Food Ingredients - New Conversion Breakthrough - Product Name: 101 Toxic Food Ingredients – New Conversion Breakthrough Click here to get 101 Toxic Food Ingredients – New Conversion Breakthrough at discounted price while it’s still available… All orders are protected by SSL encryption – the highest industry standard for online security from trusted vendors. 101 Toxic Food Ingredients – New Conversion Breakthrough is backed with a 60 Day No Questions Asked Money Back Guarantee. If within the first 60 days of receipt you are not satisfied with Wake Up Lean™, you can request a refund by sending an email to the address given inside the product and we will immediately refund your entire purchase price, with no questions asked. Description: Written By: Anthony Alayon C.F.T., C.S.N., & Best Selling Author Did you know that DANGEROUS ingredients can be found in a majority of the food items you purchase from a grocery store or any of your favorite restaurants? These ingredients can be harmful and even LIFE THREATENING. FACT: A recent study conducted by the Grocery Manufacturer’s Association states that OVER 80% of packaged foods eaten in the U.S. every day are contaminated with at LEAST ONE TOXIC ingredient. These ingredients are responsible for putting your health at risk. Did you know that as your weight increases, so does the risk of getting cancer? FACT: The American Cancer Society discloses that excess body weight contributes to as many as 1 out of 5 of all cancer related deaths.  Not only that, but 1 out of 3 deaths are also linked to poor nutrition and physical inactivity. Don’t you – as a consumer – want to know exactly what you are putting into your body? FACT: Food labels are NOT required to fully disclose the amounts of certain ingredients contained within foods you consume. I am here to open your eyes and help you learn the Truth About Food Ingredients! But first, let me introduce myself… My name is Anthony Alayon and all my colleagues call me the “Toxic Ingredient Food Decoder”. I know it may sound a bit like a tongue twister, but with over 14 years of experience in the health and fitness industry, I have spent THOUSANDS of hours relentlessly researching food ingredients and the effects they have on our bodies. Fortunately, while being surrounded by top health experts, I was able to compile the BEST strategies on how to FIGHT aging to live a long and healthy life. During my research, I discovered literally over 101 ingredients have a negative effect on our bodies… but I also uncovered which ingredients have positive health benefits as well. And today, I’m here to “spill the beans” and tell you the REAL truth.  You see, there are 3 HIGHLY-TOXIC ingredients you are consuming every day that can cause cancer, while increasing your risk of heart disease, Alzheimer’s, brain tumors, Epilepsy, and Depression… just to name a few.  By simply REMOVING these toxic food ingredients you can instantly increase your cognitive function, normalize your blood pressure, and decrease your chances of acquiring LIFE THREATENING diseases. Brace Yourself: What I am about to share with you goes AGAINST what all the popular nutritionists, diet experts, and doctors will tell you to do. So, be prepared. I’m not here to use scare tactics. I wrote this article for ONE reason, and one reason only: To tell you the REAL truth about the “healthy foods” you spend your hard earned money on. Simply follow the 3 steps mentioned below and you will finally discover the major barriers that are holding you back from living the healthy and vibrant lifestyle you deserve. I assure you these 3 steps are “little known” and fly “under the radar” as the Giant Food Companies want to keep this information from you so you keep buying their products. You’ll want to pay close attention… Society has conditioned us to think that by eating fruits and vegetables, we will have more energy and be healthier. This could NOT be any further from the TRUTH. Just take a look at the world we all live in today. According to a study conducted by the Center of Disease Control and Prevention, heart disease, cancer, diabetes and Alzheimer’s accounts for over 1.3 million deaths in the United States alone. This is the fattest and sickest we have ever been in the history of the world. The REAL problem lies in the fact that most of the foods we eat today have been Genetically Modified. A better definition of a G.M.O. food is “A food in which the gene from one species has been forced into the DNA of another species and the process itself creates all sorts of unpredicted side effects.” What this means in plain English is that the fruits and vegetables are taken out of their natural state, which is NOT what Mother Nature intended for us to do.  The big food corporations created this process in order to produce mass quantities so that we buy more from them. Negative Side Effects of Eating GMO’s You’ll Probably Eat Today There have been attempts by scientists worldwide WARNING about the negative side effects G.M.O. foods cause such as cancer, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, Alzheimer’s, joint pain, newborn diseases and nutritional problems, they were IGNORED. When lab rats were given G.M.O. foods for long periods of time, some of the DANGEROUS and HARMFUL side effects included infertility, immune problems, accelerated aging, faulty insulin regulation, and changes in major organs and the gastrointestinal system. Other side effects include food allergy symptoms, increased toxicity, negative reproductive effects, negative effects to digestive systems, unknown genetic effects on humans and EVEN DEATH (rats and mice). Here are some common foods that you are probably eating that have been Genetically Modified: There are over 39 other common foods you eat every day just like this found on the very next page. And you’ll NEVER believe this one: Food companies do NOT even have to put a label on foods containing these DANGEROUS G.M.O.’s. They do this because the companies NEED you to spend more and more money on their foods so they can stay in business. These big food companies could care less about you OR your family’s health because they only have ONE goal: Make MORE money.  By producing G.M.O.’s they are able to produce MASS QUANTITIES of unhealthy foods and lightening speed to meet the demand of the uneducated consumer. But there is a SUPER simple way to avoid all of the harmful effects of eating G.M.O. foods on the very next page. Drinking your favorite soft drink or health beverage may taste great and make you feel energetic, but in reality, it may VERY well be the REASON you are at risk of a heart attack. Unfortunately, when a food label claims that it is “sugar free,” it does not mean you are out of the woods. There is still something in the food or beverage making it taste like there is sugar in it and the #1 CULPRIT for that is NEOTAME. Neotame is a fake sugar substitute that was created years ago (back when they thought tobacco was good for you). This was done without testing the long term side effects it would have on our health. After decades of research, here is what we have found about this HARMFUL and NASTY ingredient. According to the FDA’s website, nearly 100 adverse side effects come from consuming Artificial Ingredients (like NEOTAME), which including the following: This is just 12 of the nasty side effects caused by consuming artificial food ingredients. And these “hidden” killers can be found in foods you and your family are probably consuming every week: Juices & Vegetable Drinks, Chewing Gum, Diet Soda, Ketchup, Non Fat Yogurt, Sugar Free Desserts, Low Fat Milk, Condiments, Sweetened Ice Tea, plus over 100 other foods you’re probably eating every single day. These artificial health food ingredients can be FATAL to your health.  But don’t worry, you can learn how to find healthy alternatives to this ingredient on the next page. If the first 2 ingredients to avoid were not enough, this next one is going to be EYE OPENING. Around 60% of the U.S. population has access to fluoride in its public water system. You may think that drinking water is good for you but NOT when it comes from your tap & it contains fluoride. Let me explain… Fluoride from your tap water and faucets has been PROVEN to cause the following adverse side effects: Researchers from both Harvard University’s School of Public Health and China Medical University in Shenyang, in a joint meta-analysis of 27 studies, found there were “strong indications” that fluoride exposure, particularly among developing children, is highly problematic for proper cognitive development and brain formation. It also alters your thyroid which means you will not be able to burn fat as efficiently as you need to. Not only that, but it’s known to be a neurtoxin, which INCREASES the risk of cancer. This is especially true for your children as they are still developing their brains, bodies, and endocrine systems. You can go ahead and try to find a bottled water company you trust, but plastics can be just as problematic as fluoride. OR you can find a permanent solution to this problem in just a few short minutes on the next page. On the next page, I am about to reveal the “101 Toxic Food Ingredients They NEVER Told You About” system and some easy food substitutions you can start making today to AVOID these ingredients and nasty side effects. But I do have to warn you. If you are heavily influenced by TV commercials and don’t care about what you’re putting in your body, then this ingredient reference guide is NOT for you. It’s taken me nearly 14 years of research to compile this solution. I had to consult with some of the world’s TOP nutritionists, doctors, and scientists to uncover these Silent Killers… and today I will be sharing the truth about the toxic “hidden” ingredients found in your food on the next page. This new information can NOT be found anywhere else and it can be implemented RIGHT NOW. So the next time you go grocery shopping you can easily “eliminate” these TOXIC ingredients that are making us all sicker and destroying our health. And the BEST part??? You can still continue to eat the same delicious foods and NOT have to follow some unrealistic or bland diet. Click here to get 101 Toxic Food Ingredients – New Conversion Breakthrough at discounted price while it’s still available… All orders are protected by SSL encryption – the highest industry standard for online security from trusted vendors. 101 Toxic Food Ingredients – New Conversion Breakthrough is backed with a 60 Day No Questions Asked Money Back Guarantee. If within the first 60 days of receipt you are not satisfied with Wake Up Lean™, you can request a refund by sending an email to the address given inside the product and we will immediately refund your entire purchase price, with no questions asked. - ReviewApe - https://www.reviewape.com/?p=5493

[deniscollins]

One Ohio Town’s Immigration Clash, Down in the Actual Muck

For decades, the farmers in Willard, Ohio have relied on migrant labor from spring to fall, and give them a welcoming party every spring. Seven in 10 field workers nationwide are undocumented, according to estimates by the American Farm Bureau Federation. In Willard, it is probably no different. This year, some complained due to the immigration debate. If you were on the Willard Chamber of Commerce would you: (1) hold the welcome party again or (2) request that the migrants provided documentation that they are here legally and if not, then deport them? Why? What are the ethics underlying your decision?

Migrant workers arrive here every spring to work in the “muck,” which is what everybody calls the fertile soil that makes this part of Ohio the perfect place to grow radishes, peppers, cucumbers and leafy greens. The temporary workers can be seen planting, weeding and, later in the season, harvesting crops that will be sold at national supermarket chains.

But there’s trouble in the muck this growing season.

The first sign of discontent came earlier in the year, when the Willard Area Chamber of Commerce was planning a welcome-back party for the migrants, most of whom come from Mexico and other countries farther south. Vendors were to sell food and drink. A soccer tournament, rides and singers were to entertain the crowd. At the chamber’s February meeting, everyone seemed on board.

“Our community is very fortunate we have a group of people who come here every year to work,” Cari McLendon, the chamber president, said. “We all ramp up for the season.”

But after a local newspaper published an article about the event in March, a far less welcoming response emerged, one rooted in the vigorous national debate over illegal immigration that brought President Trump to office. Some Willard residents complained that Hispanic workers did not deserve any special treatment, and that those without papers ought to be met not with open arms, but rather with handcuffs. Daniel Young, a Vietnam War veteran, wrote a letter to the editor of The Norwalk Reflector saying that he and others “are still waiting on our welcome-home party.”

By the April chamber meeting, enthusiasm for the party had waned as the controversy grew and local business leaders feared that it might attract protesters. At May’s meeting, the festival was called off. 

“We were just trying to have a fun community event,” said Ricky Branham, the chamber’s executive director. “It took on a life of its own. It got political.”

Founded in 1874 at the junction of several rail lines, Willard blossomed into a manufacturing base and agricultural hub, even though its population never broke the 7,000 mark. Today, the blue-collar town is home to a maker of snowblowers, a large book printer and a Pepperidge Farm cookie factory. The farming operations grow, pack and deliver fresh produce for consumers across the East and the Midwest.

In the 1890s, an entrepreneur named Henry Johnson realized that Willard’s expansive marsh could produce quality celery, if only it could be drained. He enticed Dutch farmers, who had settled in Michigan, to relocate here.

The first families arrived in 1896. They drained the swamp to reach the fertile earth below, built a canal system and divided up the land. Their celery cultivation gave rise to a community named Celeryville that still exists, though growers have moved on to other crops.

Their descendants — the Wierses, Buurmas and Holthouses — now grow more than three dozen kinds of vegetables sold through Kroger, Meijer, Walmart and other retailers.

For decades, the farmers have relied on migrant labor from spring to fall. Depending on how quickly they work, field workers can earn up to $18 an hour, compared with Ohio’s $8.15 minimum hourly wage. Many return year after year to do the strenuous seasonal work, sometimes in temperatures that soar to 100 degrees. (Local residents largely steer clear.)

Seven in 10 field workers nationwide are undocumented, according to estimates by the American Farm Bureau Federation. In Willard, it is probably no different.

“Without the Hispanic labor force, we wouldn’t be able to grow crops,” said Ben Wiers, a great-grandson of the pioneer Henry Wiers, who bought five acres here in 1896, noting that he considers many workers at Wiers Farms, which cultivates more than 1,000 acres of produce under the Dutch Maid label, to be friends.

But beefed-up border enforcement has slowed the flow of workers who enter the country illegally. Last year, a shortage forced Mr. Wiers and the other growers to leave millions of dollars’ worth of produce in the fields.

This year could be worse. The Trump administration has encouraged local law enforcement across the country to help identify deportable individuals for the federal authorities, making long-distance travel risky for those already in the country without legal status.

“It’s not a hospitable climate,” lamented Mr. Wiers, who joined other farmers in discussing their concerns recently with Representative Jim Jordan, Republican of Ohio.

Down the road, another area farmer, Chadd Buurma, said, “I have nothing but positive feelings toward the migrants.”

At the monthly muck growers’ association breakfast, the farmers pray for the safe travel of their workers.

“We pray and hope the workers show up,” Ken Holthouse, a descendant of the Dutch settler Jan Holthuis, said as he looked out across his fields.

About 30 people showed up for a community meeting on May 16 at the Church of God of Prophecy here to learn about the potential impact of immigration enforcement on Willard.

They heard from a panel of clergy members, immigrant advocates, lawyers and Jesus Manuel Lara Lopez, a Mexican national who has lived in Willard since 2001 but is now facing deportation.

“I have four children; I’ve never been in trouble. I’d like to ask for your prayers,” he said in Spanish, which was translated into English. “Sadness fills my heart.”

Listening attentively at round tables were Hispanics and a handful of white residents, including Judy and Dave Smith, who stormed out of the room.

“I’m a compassionate person,” Ms. Smith declared, fuming in the hallway. “I believe people who come here have to come here the right way. It makes me angry when I hear people talking about harboring illegals.”

Growing up poor in Willard, Ms. Smith said, she sometimes faced racial slurs for being Italian. Now she lives on the right side of the tracks, she said, selling used beds, mattresses and clothing, often to “Spanish people.” That doesn’t mean they all belong here, she said.

Her husband said he didn’t like hearing that everyone in the country, legally or not, is protected by the Constitution.

Ask where to find immigrants in Willard, and residents respond “in the muck,” the charcoal-black, organic-rich farmland that abuts the town.

Over the years, many Latin Americans have settled here, working year-round on the farms as well as at nurseries and factories.

Downtown Willard’s main artery, Myrtle Avenue, has enjoyed a renaissance thanks to Taco Rico and other Hispanic-owned businesses.

“We need to make them part of the fabric of Willard,” said City Manager Jim Ludban, who grew up here. He said he had been “100 percent” in favor of throwing a welcome-back party for the seasonal migrants.

As it is, the fear that exists among Willard’s immigrants is palpable and, with apprehensions on the rise, fewer are expected to arrive.

“People used to be care-free. Now they’re afraid to leave their homes,” said Romeo Perez, who arrived here from Mexico 13 years ago to work in agriculture but now runs Romeo’s Bakery, which prepares traditional Mexican sweet bread called pan dulce. As a consequence of that fear, he has seen business drop by 20 percent since January.

Mr. Perez worries that his bakery won’t get a seasonal bump this summer from farm workers, either, because “everyone knows they aren’t coming like they used to.”

Coin-operated laundries, banks, gas stations and other businesses could also lose the typical boom in business that comes with the arrival of the seasonal workers.

“Oh, Lord, we order extra of everything; we double up on people and hours,” said a hopeful Denise Maynard, assistant manager of Save-A-Lot, one of two supermarkets in town. She described buses that disgorge migrants, who push “overheaping cartloads” through the store’s aisles.

Just two days before the first radishes were ready to be pulled up in late May, field workers had hardly started to trickle in.

On the edge of Willard’s fields, three migrants pondered the current state of affairs after a day’s work.

“Everyone’s afraid to come,” said Jorge Ramirez, the only American among the three and the one who had driven the others — from Mexico — up from Florida. “There is too big a risk of getting caught.”

The men had a close call on a road an hour south of Willard.

Asked for identification by a pair of state troopers, the two Mexicans produced their passports. Mr. Ramirez, who presented his license, said that he was accused of human smuggling.

Two hours later, the men were released to their crew supervisor, whom they had reached by phone — but only after a sheriff’s deputy intervened. According to Mr. Ramirez, he arrived and told the others: “You aren’t immigration agents. Who the hell do you think will harvest our crops?”

It has been 16 years since Mr. Lara left his village in Chiapas, Mexico, sneaked across the border and headed to Willard, where he had heard that jobs were plentiful.

He worked the land. He fell in love with Anahi Salinas, a fellow Mexican, and they eventually married and had American-citizen children. He became rooted in the community.

“I was working and raising a family,” Mr. Lara, 38, recalled on the back porch of the beige clapboard house with maroon shutters that he bought a year ago with a $60,000 mortgage.

His sons, Eric, 13; Edwin, 11; and Anuar, 10, played basketball nearby. His daughter, Elsiy, 6, entertained herself by skipping around.

In 2008, Mr. Lara was pulled over on his way to the dentist. Unable to produce a driver’s license, which is not issued to undocumented residents in Ohio, he was jailed. A sheriff’s deputy contacted Immigration and Customs Enforcement. Deportation proceedings followed, culminating in a removal order in 2011.

The government granted Mr. Lara a deportation reprieve because he was otherwise law-abiding, and he was placed under an order of supervision with a work permit, requiring that he check in with ICE annually and renew it.

In January, after the Trump administration announced that no one in the country illegally was exempt from deportation, immigrants like Mr. Lara became vulnerable.

On March 28, when he arrived for his check-in with ICE in Cleveland, officials tethered an electronic tracking monitor to his ankle over objections from his lawyer, who argued that he was no flight risk.

When Mr. Lara raised his trousers to reveal the black, clunky device — he charges it every 12 hours — Elsiy blurted out: “That’s a thing the police put. My Daddy isn’t a criminal!”

His application for a “stay of removal” included several letters of support, including one from an official at a center where he studied English, learned how to operate a forklift and enrolled in a machine workshop. Such efforts were “testimony of his great desire to better himself to be able to thrive in his community,” the letter said, aiming to prove “good moral character.”

In a denial note, an ICE assistant field director, Timothy Ward, wrote, “I have determined that pursuing removal of Mr. Lara Lopez is consistent with enforcement priorities.”

“If this guy is a priority for removal, I don’t know who isn’t,” his lawyer, David Leopold, said in an interview.

The authorities ordered Mr. Lara to report to the ICE office in Cleveland on May 19 with an airline ticket back to Mexico, which he bought at his own expense. On June 5, the agency denied a request by his lawyer that it reconsider removing him. The request included references from an employer, his neighbors and his children’s teachers.

Mr. Lara’s flight is scheduled for July 18.

For the moment, he continues to work the graveyard shift packing Milano cookies and Goldfish crackers at the Pepperidge Farm plant. He also picks up other part-time work.

“I don’t get any help from the government,” he said.

Their next-door neighbor, Jennifer Fidler, called Mr. Lara a role model. “All I ever see him do is work, take care of his children and go to church,” she said. “Why would you get rid of a good person?”

[reviewape-blog]

101 Toxic Food Ingredients - New Conversion Breakthrough

https://www.reviewape.com/?p=5277 101 Toxic Food Ingredients - New Conversion Breakthrough - Product Name: 101 Toxic Food Ingredients – New Conversion Breakthrough Click here to get 101 Toxic Food Ingredients – New Conversion Breakthrough at discounted price while it’s still available… All orders are protected by SSL encryption – the highest industry standard for online security from trusted vendors. 101 Toxic Food Ingredients – New Conversion Breakthrough is backed with a 60 Day No Questions Asked Money Back Guarantee. If within the first 60 days of receipt you are not satisfied with Wake Up Lean™, you can request a refund by sending an email to the address given inside the product and we will immediately refund your entire purchase price, with no questions asked. Description: Written By: Anthony Alayon C.F.T., C.S.N., & Best Selling Author Did you know that DANGEROUS ingredients can be found in a majority of the food items you purchase from a grocery store or any of your favorite restaurants? These ingredients can be harmful and even LIFE THREATENING. FACT: A recent study conducted by the Grocery Manufacturer’s Association states that OVER 80% of packaged foods eaten in the U.S. every day are contaminated with at LEAST ONE TOXIC ingredient. These ingredients are responsible for putting your health at risk. Did you know that as your weight increases, so does the risk of getting cancer? FACT: The American Cancer Society discloses that excess body weight contributes to as many as 1 out of 5 of all cancer related deaths.  Not only that, but 1 out of 3 deaths are also linked to poor nutrition and physical inactivity. Don’t you – as a consumer – want to know exactly what you are putting into your body? FACT: Food labels are NOT required to fully disclose the amounts of certain ingredients contained within foods you consume. I am here to open your eyes and help you learn the Truth About Food Ingredients! But first, let me introduce myself… My name is Anthony Alayon and all my colleagues call me the “Toxic Ingredient Food Decoder”. I know it may sound a bit like a tongue twister, but with over 14 years of experience in the health and fitness industry, I have spent THOUSANDS of hours relentlessly researching food ingredients and the effects they have on our bodies. Fortunately, while being surrounded by top health experts, I was able to compile the BEST strategies on how to FIGHT aging to live a long and healthy life. During my research, I discovered literally over 101 ingredients have a negative effect on our bodies… but I also uncovered which ingredients have positive health benefits as well. And today, I’m here to “spill the beans” and tell you the REAL truth.  You see, there are 3 HIGHLY-TOXIC ingredients you are consuming every day that can cause cancer, while increasing your risk of heart disease, Alzheimer’s, brain tumors, Epilepsy, and Depression… just to name a few.  By simply REMOVING these toxic food ingredients you can instantly increase your cognitive function, normalize your blood pressure, and decrease your chances of acquiring LIFE THREATENING diseases. Brace Yourself: What I am about to share with you goes AGAINST what all the popular nutritionists, diet experts, and doctors will tell you to do. So, be prepared. I’m not here to use scare tactics. I wrote this article for ONE reason, and one reason only: To tell you the REAL truth about the “healthy foods” you spend your hard earned money on. Simply follow the 3 steps mentioned below and you will finally discover the major barriers that are holding you back from living the healthy and vibrant lifestyle you deserve. I assure you these 3 steps are “little known” and fly “under the radar” as the Giant Food Companies want to keep this information from you so you keep buying their products. You’ll want to pay close attention… Society has conditioned us to think that by eating fruits and vegetables, we will have more energy and be healthier. This could NOT be any further from the TRUTH. Just take a look at the world we all live in today. According to a study conducted by the Center of Disease Control and Prevention, heart disease, cancer, diabetes and Alzheimer’s accounts for over 1.3 million deaths in the United States alone. This is the fattest and sickest we have ever been in the history of the world. The REAL problem lies in the fact that most of the foods we eat today have been Genetically Modified. A better definition of a G.M.O. food is “A food in which the gene from one species has been forced into the DNA of another species and the process itself creates all sorts of unpredicted side effects.” What this means in plain English is that the fruits and vegetables are taken out of their natural state, which is NOT what Mother Nature intended for us to do.  The big food corporations created this process in order to produce mass quantities so that we buy more from them. Negative Side Effects of Eating GMO’s You’ll Probably Eat Today There have been attempts by scientists worldwide WARNING about the negative side effects G.M.O. foods cause such as cancer, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, Alzheimer’s, joint pain, newborn diseases and nutritional problems, they were IGNORED. When lab rats were given G.M.O. foods for long periods of time, some of the DANGEROUS and HARMFUL side effects included infertility, immune problems, accelerated aging, faulty insulin regulation, and changes in major organs and the gastrointestinal system. Other side effects include food allergy symptoms, increased toxicity, negative reproductive effects, negative effects to digestive systems, unknown genetic effects on humans and EVEN DEATH (rats and mice). Here are some common foods that you are probably eating that have been Genetically Modified: There are over 39 other common foods you eat every day just like this found on the very next page. And you’ll NEVER believe this one: Food companies do NOT even have to put a label on foods containing these DANGEROUS G.M.O.’s. They do this because the companies NEED you to spend more and more money on their foods so they can stay in business. These big food companies could care less about you OR your family’s health because they only have ONE goal: Make MORE money.  By producing G.M.O.’s they are able to produce MASS QUANTITIES of unhealthy foods and lightening speed to meet the demand of the uneducated consumer. But there is a SUPER simple way to avoid all of the harmful effects of eating G.M.O. foods on the very next page. Drinking your favorite soft drink or health beverage may taste great and make you feel energetic, but in reality, it may VERY well be the REASON you are at risk of a heart attack. Unfortunately, when a food label claims that it is “sugar free,” it does not mean you are out of the woods. There is still something in the food or beverage making it taste like there is sugar in it and the #1 CULPRIT for that is NEOTAME. Neotame is a fake sugar substitute that was created years ago (back when they thought tobacco was good for you). This was done without testing the long term side effects it would have on our health. After decades of research, here is what we have found about this HARMFUL and NASTY ingredient. According to the FDA’s website, nearly 100 adverse side effects come from consuming Artificial Ingredients (like NEOTAME), which including the following: This is just 12 of the nasty side effects caused by consuming artificial food ingredients. And these “hidden” killers can be found in foods you and your family are probably consuming every week: Juices & Vegetable Drinks, Chewing Gum, Diet Soda, Ketchup, Non Fat Yogurt, Sugar Free Desserts, Low Fat Milk, Condiments, Sweetened Ice Tea, plus over 100 other foods you’re probably eating every single day. These artificial health food ingredients can be FATAL to your health.  But don’t worry, you can learn how to find healthy alternatives to this ingredient on the next page. If the first 2 ingredients to avoid were not enough, this next one is going to be EYE OPENING. Around 60% of the U.S. population has access to fluoride in its public water system. You may think that drinking water is good for you but NOT when it comes from your tap & it contains fluoride. Let me explain… Fluoride from your tap water and faucets has been PROVEN to cause the following adverse side effects: Researchers from both Harvard University’s School of Public Health and China Medical University in Shenyang, in a joint meta-analysis of 27 studies, found there were “strong indications” that fluoride exposure, particularly among developing children, is highly problematic for proper cognitive development and brain formation. It also alters your thyroid which means you will not be able to burn fat as efficiently as you need to. Not only that, but it’s known to be a neurtoxin, which INCREASES the risk of cancer. This is especially true for your children as they are still developing their brains, bodies, and endocrine systems. You can go ahead and try to find a bottled water company you trust, but plastics can be just as problematic as fluoride. OR you can find a permanent solution to this problem in just a few short minutes on the next page. On the next page, I am about to reveal the “101 Toxic Food Ingredients They NEVER Told You About” system and some easy food substitutions you can start making today to AVOID these ingredients and nasty side effects. But I do have to warn you. If you are heavily influenced by TV commercials and don’t care about what you’re putting in your body, then this ingredient reference guide is NOT for you. It’s taken me nearly 14 years of research to compile this solution. I had to consult with some of the world’s TOP nutritionists, doctors, and scientists to uncover these Silent Killers… and today I will be sharing the truth about the toxic “hidden” ingredients found in your food on the next page. This new information can NOT be found anywhere else and it can be implemented RIGHT NOW. So the next time you go grocery shopping you can easily “eliminate” these TOXIC ingredients that are making us all sicker and destroying our health. And the BEST part??? You can still continue to eat the same delicious foods and NOT have to follow some unrealistic or bland diet. Click here to get 101 Toxic Food Ingredients – New Conversion Breakthrough at discounted price while it’s still available… All orders are protected by SSL encryption – the highest industry standard for online security from trusted vendors. 101 Toxic Food Ingredients – New Conversion Breakthrough is backed with a 60 Day No Questions Asked Money Back Guarantee. If within the first 60 days of receipt you are not satisfied with Wake Up Lean™, you can request a refund by sending an email to the address given inside the product and we will immediately refund your entire purchase price, with no questions asked. - ReviewApe - https://www.reviewape.com/?p=5277