#I could do a little lore dump on the other project

[shinjiist]

interesting…looks like in that first apocalypse au art Callie has scars in the same place as some of her zombie-isms. Does this mean Callie is cured? Or is that first art taking place before Callie is infected?

YES i was hoping someone would ask about this

Iif you are infected, the disease is curable up to a certain threshold. The longer it progresses untreated, there will be health effects related to infection (ex. with Callie, the affected eye "grew" back, but she's now severely visually impaired and photosensitive in that eye). Both eyes are more sensitive in general because they are less protected from UV rays (lost melanin).

Most people assume that once you're infected it's game over, and the cure is difficult to synthesize, never mind distribute.

Tacking on some more information because I was doing some more writing a while ago regarding the disease and its origin and I like talking

Old sketch mostly for color and concept

Retconned some stuff surrounding Marina and the details of the settlements bc it was kind of broad, the timeline is pushed back a bit further into the past.

Marina and Pearl are still together but since I changed how the disease itself works as well as the timeframe, I don't think they're quite in a spot to open the doors of their compound to outsiders. Marina is still studying the disease and Pearl is infected. Her treatments consist of sitting in a medicated ink solution to slow the progression of the disease and the presentation of symptoms.

Also note their states of dress here. Pearl stays inside mostly because the disease is causing chronic fatigue, but Marina seems hardly equipped to be coming face-to-face with shamblers and definitely not to prevent injuries or micro-abrasions ....

The disease is actually an octarian bioweapon :3 Marina is unable to become sick from it. It wasn't intended to be used just yet. Octolings can be carriers (as I hc they and inklings to be similar species, but it's more of a horse + donkey situation).

I haven't been drawing all that much for the au, so I don't have anything else to attach rn (I've been busy writing a different au and the doc has ~11k words atm). I drafted this a while ago and hoped to have more to share but not yet

[mixtapedoh]

and it was all yellow | y.j.

welcome back to SVTU ! lost your way? refer to our campus map for directions.

pairing: yoon jeonghan x gn!reader with guest appearances from c. seungcheol, h. joshua, w. junhui, and more !

word count: ~5.9k genre: neighbors to friends to lovers warnings: language, intermittent Lore Dumping™ (i have to kick us off into svtu somehow), jeonghan is a little shit, light suggestive themes (heavily lampshaded and perhaps only occuring twice?)

☄. *. ⋆

olive's notes: these individual headcanon sets are going to be very ~stream of consciousness~, so bear with me, here. second, cheol and jeonghan are brothers (and there's a secret third brother i'll introduce eventually, don't you worry), also, thank you for stopping by <3. now here's the content you signed up for.

☄. *. ⋆

now playing... ılı.lıllılı.ıllı. ... ⌜ angel baby — troye sivan ⌟

AND IT WAS ALL YELLOW ☄. *. ⋆

— it all started when jeonghan realized that jun was loaded.

now, don't get him wrong. it wasn't as though he had befriended jun because jeonghan had been looking for someone rich and easily persuaded. it's not like jeonghan used his ineffable charm to win over the quasi-cryptid that was wen junhui because of jun's apparent legacy funds.

not that jeonghan couldn't have done — he clearly had the persuasion and cunning to do it — he just didn't. jeonghan wasn't in need of someone else's money. please. he was very capable of taking care of himself, thank you very much, he was just also, however, very good at knowing things.

especially those things that could be used to his advantage.

— and well... wen junhui was loaded. wealthy as shit. a classic trust fund baby. a walking dollar sign that just so happened to share classes with jeonghan every year since he started SVTU as a political science major (of arts, of course. he hadn't taken latin in high school to not absolutely crush the romance languages in uni).

— you see, SVTU had this fun little program for long-suffering students interested in the government and manipulating it to their will wherein if you took merger courses — lectures that ate up a hell of a lot of your time and money but gave substantial credit hours that counted for both applied and allied course credit — you could get a jump start on your degree, be offered more opportunities for internship, and explore a subject's "many facets" through "multiple lenses."

to jeonghan, it meant working faster and harder so that he might graduate early and get into the actual politics of pol sci quicker — at a more “genius” and “revolutionary” age.

(half of politics, after all, was being appealing enough to make headlines. there wasn’t time to waste, in the long run.)

to wen junhui it had to mean something different — after all, jun was a pre-law student with a completely different career path from the other party involved (though jeonghan had considered law at one point in time — something he’s not above admitting though certainly not pining after). merger courses for him likely meant an expedited process to law school. but that was truly beside the point. an aside.

— what mattered in the end, was that jeonghan and jun had more than enough shared merger courses to go around, and in the process of things, had gone from strangers to acquaintances, then study partners (blame it on the fact that jun — the altruistic leaning bastard he was — actually tutored in his free time. willingly. as in, not a joke.) to committed group project members, and eventually to that nebulous thing called friendship.

ask them both when that final stage commenced and you’d get varying responses — jeonghan always far more generous than jun in such regards, but almost annoyingly so, like he wanted to be the one leaning more on the ridiculous.

— yes, it was quite a ways into their friendship when jeonghan learned that wen junhui, his sweet jun, was loaded. like, living alone off of campus in his own two bedroom apartment on the wealthy side of the city that prospered from the University Living Aesthetic™, loaded. as in, so loaded he could have easily found more than enough willing bodies to become roommates with him and help pay for the exorbitant expenses but simply decided against it because he hadn’t, and i quote “thought about it before.”

“never thought about it? jun. how much does this place cost?”

and jun had to think for a minute. genuinely think about how much he paid in monthly rent. “i suppose for a month’s rent i pay around… [REDACTED].”

and jeonghan was no stranger to dramatics, to be sure, but anyone else would have gaped the same as him. “[REDACTED]??”

"[REDACTED]."

"...shit."

— yes, jeonghan finding out that jun was loaded, living in a (rather well kept) apartment with an empty room, no roommates, and an assortment of (dying) houseplants that needed care, was truly the beginning of it all.

— after all, while the chaos settled in a year after the fact when he and joshua would finally move in with jun because of circumstances that aren't truly relevant to the here and now, all true origins start a little before dramatic changes. there's always a gentle precursor, something soft that sets the stage. rumblings of change are necessary forefathers to the strength of revolution; jeonghan learning that jun was a walking line of credit with property to his name and a work ethic that would make any professor blush was necessary groundwork for the events that would follow.

and goddamn, if things didn't follow.

— but i suppose, if we're back tracking all the way to jeonghan and shua moving in with jun on one very ill timed sunday (jun had an exam in his special topics in deviance, crime, & the law course the next day), we are also brushing up against jeonghan meeting you.

another precursor to the chaos that would follow. another tremor that would shake the ground and cause things to tumble.

— you also lived in the terraces on 17th and attended svtu. you lived on the same floor as jun — two apartments down from his, no less — and his first week there, you showed jeonghan the campus shuttle routes that passed right outside the complex (he'd come to learn that the domino route was the one you took most often, as it led right to the heart of the university, but the pinwheel route was also a convenient option for evening courses).

— you and jeonghan weren't friends right away. no, you were always a friendly face around the complex and a decent conversationalist when stuck in the elevator together, but it wasn't as though you and jeonghan became fast friends. you were just neighbors for a while; just another person grabbing mail on monday afternoons, stopping at the in-residence coffee shop on bleak wednesday mornings, ordering pizza on saturday evenings and giving joshua a slice after he weaponizes his big, brown eyes.

— and then came The Series of Fire Alarm Mishaps.

— you see, at some point in the middle of the semester, someone new moved into the apartment building, in the same hall as you and jeonghan. at first, you barely even noticed the change, and then they started cooking.

— which wouldn't have been a problem. if they had been good at it.

the first few times the (incredibly loud and not unreasonably sensitive) fire alarms from down the hall had gone off, it had been unfortunate - a mild nuisance that disrupted what jeonghan had been doing, and nothing more. but then, the first few times became multiple, and from multiple, came a pattern. every other day, at least twice, the fire alarm next door would go off. and it would always be at different times - breakfast, the afternoon, early evening, even sometimes at 1:28 in the morning. the fire alarm would sound, and while it would mostly be no longer than a minute or two, it was still enough to be irritating.

you and jeonghan talked about it every time you saw each other in passing, or just so happened to be taking the same shuttle to campus (which happened quite often, anymore, since jeonghan enrolled in an extra course to help him graduate all the sooner). your neighbor and that damn fire alarm. your neighbor and their inability to cook, yet unnecessary dedication to the craft. you both joked about the inevitability of them actually burning the apartment down.

— and then, one day, the fire alarm went off at 2:19, waking jeonghan up out of a dead sleep (he hadn't meant to fall asleep at his desk, and his neck would pay for it all the next day). he heard it, and immediately decided to ignore it, knowing it would stop soon.

but then it didn't.

at about 3.5 minutes of non-stop alarms, jeonghan was annoyed enough that he left his room and staggered into the kitchen for some water, where shua and jun were already waiting around, likely with the same idea (though it was clear that shua hadn't ever fallen asleep, and perhaps jun was in the same boat, though he'd changed into sweats and a light t-shirt).

at about 6 minutes, jeonghan opened the door to see if anyone else was, well... concerned.

and at 13 minutes, he was standing outside in the brisk autumn air, agreeing with jun as he whispered that if there wasn't an actual fire but just their talentless neighbor attempting to cook in the middle of the night, he was going to kill the bastard himself.

— and there, in the middle of all this stupidity — sleepily rocking back and forth from one foot to another — and on the other side of him, was you.

— and, well, when you offered to buy him and the rest of his roommates coffee at the convenience store that was just down the street, not far, he couldn't do much beyond say yes. what was he going to do? decline your offer?

and so all four of you walked to the convenience store and aimlessly wound your way through the almost neon colored aisles. jeonghan used the opportunity to stick to you like glue and get you to open up — about yourself and your roommates, both of whom had gone home for two weeks for (separate) family vacations (not that you were jealous. clearly the superior option was to stay at the apartment, embroiled in course work and standing outside at 2:00 am because of some loser neighbor who can't cook a singular meal without burning the building to the ground, and yet refuses to have anything delivered).

— in the end, the fire hadn't been bigger than something contained in the pan ("thank god," you had said, shaking your hands in lackluster triumph, "i have a physics exam next week. i need those notes more than you know"), but at only 4 months of having a new neighbor, someone new moved in within 2 weeks at most. and, after being neighbors for almost 7 months, you and jeonghan were decidedly friends.

after all, you bought him a triangular gimbap, ice cream, and convenience store coffee. jun had slipped away with just a banana milk (which he promptly paid back the next day), and shua nearly bought out the whole store once the two of you got to talking about the best midnight (and hours after) snacks lining the walls. at the least, he was indebted to you, which could only be solved by more trips to the convenience store with more mindless conversation, and more time for the both of you to endear yourself to the other.

and the way jeonghan saw it, friendship at that point was inevitable. especially when, at the start of the next semester, you and jeonghan both had an early morning class and used the domino route to get to class via campus shuttle.

(and sure, jun had an early class, too, and drove himself to campus everyday, meaning jeonghan could have easily just gotten a ride, but he didn't. for no particular reason, really, he just never did; but one frost bitten morning after a snowstorm, when jeonghan was waiting at the shuttle stop and you stood beside him, bundled up in a thick winter coat and rubbing the tips of your fingers to keep them warm, you turned to him, the cord of the wired headphones the both of you always shared swaying from the movement (a streak of yellow against all this white, the sun in the middle of stark winter), and smiled, "i'm glad you're here with me." and maybe — just maybe — that was reason enough.)

— and thus, for reasons above explained, in the end, it all started with jeonghan learning jun was loaded. if it weren't for that simple knowledge, he wouldn't be anywhere near where he currently stood.

— which was the open doorway of jun's apartment, garbage in hand, falling in love with you.

"what?"

and you at least had the presence of mind to be flustered by it.

jeonghan could laugh, really. "is that my jacket?"

it totally was, and perhaps the way you fiddled with the sleeve of it and scoffed awkwardly, refusing to meet his eyes, was the true giveaway that you knew it most certainly was. "i don't know, is it?"

you were met with smug silence, so of course, you'd elaborate.

"i thought it belonged to my ex. i just chose what looked the warmest. it's storming out there — you might want something more than a sweatshirt if you're taking that all the way to cans." you gestured to the garbage bag — a detail jeonghan had almost forgotten at the sight of you in his clothing.

"you think your ex would have bought that?"

of course he wasn't going to take your bait in changing the subject. that would make things easy. you rolled your eyes, spinning your key ring and making it jingle. "hoseok has great style. it's just different from yours."

"and that jacket is more my style than his."

"it is," you conceded. under jeonghan's gaze you stuck one half of the jacket out, towards him. "do you want it now? you'll need it out there."

"i don't think i will. not when i'll have your sunny presence to warm me."

and for a split second your eyes narrowed. you had just come in from the storm — that much was plain to see from the wet of the jacket to the reusable grocery bag in your hand, full of pantry odds and ends. there was no need to go back out, and you and jeonghan both knew it. and not to mention that the invitation (thinly veiled) was unattractive — stay inside where it was warm or brave the stormy weather once more, all for a garbage run?

"race you to the elevator."

— and see, the truth of the fact was, it wasn't as though you made it difficult to fall in love with you (though even if you had, jeonghan would have liked the challenge, perhaps. there's fun in plenty of things). you were generous, a good conversationalist, you bitched about people with jeonghan but still tried to see the best in them, you were knowledgeable about the most random yet oddly applicable things, and for all of his teasing, you put up with him. perhaps enjoyed him.

— it certainly confused seungcheol, to say the least (but don't such things always confuse brothers).

"as someone who's had a lifetime to cherish your personality, there has to be something wrong with this y/n if they're willingly spending time with you. i'm trying to save my soul, putting up with you on the daily. they have no excuse."

"if i'm going to respond to that, you'll have to give me five minutes to run first."

and it ended with jeonghan quickly pushing away from the table, trying to duck out of seungcheol's grasp; but of course, the older brother and president of the boxing club would get him anyway, and through laughter, attempt to knock some humility into jeonghan (it wouldn't stick).

— but no need to focus on all of that, now. after all, this deep into the semester, jeonghan was busy enough without Crippling Thoughts of Romance.

— the worst damage you wrought thus far was making him choke that day you wandered into karaoke club and he was in the middle of a duet joshuji had managed to cajole him into doing on the spot (you swore up and down that you didn't know he was even in the club to begin with, but something about your flustered behavior and shua's glee at the whole affair made him consider otherwise); while it had been a (minor, he claimed) blow to his pride, it was easily pushed aside. jihoon, the bastard, might bring it up on occasion — the one (1) time angel voice yoon jeonghan chokes, and it's all on camera — but other than that, jeonghan? cool as a cucumber.

the last thing he'd do is be awkward around a crush. jeonghan was cool; jeonghan was suave; jeonghan was speaking in the third person because joshuji had been on a self-love bender a few months back and had said daily affirmations into the mirror every morning, and after finding out and teasing him relentlessly for it, jeonghan unfortunately picked up the habit.

AND IT WAS ALL YELLOW (CONT.) ☄. *. ⋆

— and now that we've gotten this far, i suppose it's time we bring up Jeonghan Habits™ because there were many, the closer you and jeonghan got to each other, strings of fate drawing you ever nearer, joining you at the hip.

— for one, it seemed that ever since that first unfortunately timed run to the convenience store at hours after-midnight, jeonghan felt comfortable just showing up at all odd hours of the evening, all messy hair and too-big hooded sweatshirts (most stolen from seungcheol, he'd reveal to you one day when you were confused as to just when jeonghan had picked up a love of coton de tulear puppy conventions — enough to get a commemoriative sweatshirt, no less), with the oh-so-enticing offer of going to grab a snack.

he even called it a date, once, when you were wrapped up in three blankets and your fuzzy house slippers, weakly try to convince him to just rummage through you're cupboards instead

"you're so cold you're going to cancel our date? and here i thought we had something real."

(you'd been so flustered by the whole exchange you simply ended up going to the with him, hoping that the act of Just Doing It would buy you time against his rapid fire machine gun comebacks — probably exactly what the fucker had planned in his 4d chessboard of a brain — and jeonghan took the opportunity to file away in his mind the cute expression that crossed your face in the split second that the words hit you fully in the chest and you floundered, wide-eyed into recovery)

— another, of course, was his habit of casually leaving things at your place whenever the two of you hung out; the first few times he left something — his jacket, a pair of sunglasses, necklaces that you don't ever quite recall him taking off to begin with — you promptly returned it with the naive belief that it was a one-off mistake not like to happen again. but it just kept happening, and so eventually, you just stopped returning.

if it were important, jeonghan would have texted you about it — he texted you about all kinds of random things, anyway, his lost socks would be no more strange than texts of ootds or how particularly sparkly his eyes looked that day.

and he never did...

until you started to wear the things he left, of course.

'should i get two of these?' the text came in while you were walking to your next class, taking your sweet time since the weather had cleared up nicely and the campus shuttles were running smoothly — not a single one hand been late all week, a sure change from usual. a moment later your phone chimed again, and jeonghan had sent a picture of a silver ring with a greek key styling. it was cool enough, and fit in nicely with jeonghan's usual style of accessory (not that you were particularly knowledgeable of such things... haha.)

'sure, but why 2?'

'so you can have one of your own instead of stealing it.'

'???!?'

'look at your outfit right now. you're wearing MY necklace. it's been missing for weeks.'

'YOU LEFT IT AT *MY* APARTMENT??????'

'you still have necklaces of your own; didn't have to be mine.'

'😑'

'so what's your ring size?'

'stfu'

— in your defense, you didn't think it was an issue, borrowing the things he'd randomly leave at your apartment. it had started off innocuously enough — seonghwa and momo (your roommates, bless them) needed you to go grab a few last minute ingredients for dinner (they were the ones cooking, so charitably you offered to do the grunt work) and when you couldn't find your own sunglasses, there were jeonghan's, just sitting on your dresser and waiting to be used.

and after that, well... jeonghan had nice style, okay? you were not immune to convenient and accessible clothing. if jeonghan wasn't so forgetful of his own articles of clothing, it wouldn't be the case that you steal his favorite sunglasses and borrow his usual rings and get a little too caught up in the way his cologne lingers on his jackets and night shirts, a smell all-too comforting and somehow tempting...

— you attempted to give the necklace back later that week when you and jeonghan met up to take the domino route to university, but he just shrugged it off and told you that you might as well keep it. he already bought himself another.

and besides. it looked good on you.

— and as for the last of Jeonghan's Habits™ (certified and trademarked, of course, everything jeonghan did was protected by common law)... well... the discovery of this one came later, at a time you weren't expecting it, and so perhaps that explains why it makes you as flustered as it does.

— see, it's of no surprise that yoon jeonghan is clingy in a very positive sense.

being friends with jeonghan is always being kept in the loop, having an ongoing dialogue about most everything, doing lot of Things together and always knowing that if there's something you're even thinking of doing, jeonghan has already cleared his schedule in anticipation of going to do said thing alongside you.

— what surprised you, but really shouldn't have (so perhaps the right word is simply astonished, flustered, made giddy by the realization of), was that he was also very cuddly. and very hard to be talked out of, no less.

— and like, okay, sure, it was kind of hypocritical of you to be taken aback when you'd been indulging jeonghan of his affinity for physical touch for quite some time, now.

the surprise hugs whenever he caught you waiting for the campus shuttle or simply Minding Your Own Business, his inclination towards taking your hand to make you walk a little faster when the two of you were going convenience store diving (yes, again), the quite literal poking and prodding whenever he was attempting to get you to change your mind and agree with his worst impulses... it was all pretty damning, in retrospect. but it never really fazed you: jeonghan's cuddly sort of behavior.

though you had gotten a smug kind of glee whenever you initiated contact and jeonghan's cheeks would warm to a beautiful shade of pink before he'd counter his own seeming embarrassment with a comment like "aaahhhh y/n, you're so familiar, what would others think if they saw you?"

randomly touch jeonghan's forearm, whether to pull him closer for some reason or another or just to softly massage the skin while you absentmindedly scrolled on your phone (instagram scrolling was sacred time you and jeonghan shared — then you didn't have to send him the reel with your comments, you could just tap him on the shoulder and show him). they way jeonghan would get all shy at the touch — like maybe he felt some of those butterflies that perpetually fluttered about in your stomach whenever he was around — was all the satisfaction you could ever need.

— so yes, you were quite used to clingy jeonghan. but cuddly? you had never quite strayed into full cuddle territory... until you did.

— that fateful night, you had lovingly been given notice via a very abrupt group text that you would not be able to return to your apartment for the evening (someone was going to have company over, doing... things that familiar company do) and when you had told jeonghan of your plans to join seonghwa in his trip to the computer rooms at crescent hub (they were open 24 hours and while it was based on reservation, you were almost always able to get a seat), he offered you come to his apartment instead.

either that, or i guess you could spend your time watching the gaming club host whatever tournament they had going on — apparently jun was planning to be gone for Quite Some Time (as a senior member of the club) and shua was there... for moral support? that part was unclear, to be quite honest, but it wasn't as though shua ever needed a reason to be Busy and Outgoing, so it didn't quite matter much, in the end.

"why aren't you at crescent hub with your roommates, then?"

"and encourage them? ah... don't make me look soft."

and you're sure that the way you roll your eyes can be heard through the phone.

"i had an assignment to finish." / "you had work to finish."

"but! it's all been submitted now."

"then i'll meet you."

— after all, it's not like you were a stranger to jun's apartment — you'd hung out there plenty of times as your bond with jeonghan deepened and your friendship to shua and jun grew — and they did have a rather comfy couch... you were almost certain jeonghan's offer implied and unspoken 'you can at least get some comfortable sleep on our vertiable cloud of a couch when i'm done prying at the finer details as to just who momo decided to bring home.'

you both, after all, had a deep-seeded delight for gossip.

— and when you got there, it was exactly what you expected: jeonghan had seemingly raided the pantry finding ingredients so the two of you could make dakdoritang — excepting the carrot, of course.

despite his seeming love for convenience store runs and general lazy attitude toward preparing his own meals, cooking together seemed to be something jeonghan enjoyed lately — or at least, that's what you surmised. to you, it seemed that one day jeonghan woke up and chose cooking as a new hobby.

if you were to ask jeonghan, he would brush it off, of course, probably saying something about his mom visiting and praising jun's affinity for cooking and there was no way jeonghan could let the bastard win — but really all it had taken was one (1) absentminded hand on his chest from you and a "hannie, can you pass me the garlic cloves?" for him to make cooking with you a new personality trait of his. go figure.

— and so the two of you made your stew while debating which movie you should watch when you were done. you ended up compromising on some drama that you'd seen people claim was so bad it was good, and it really was. the cringe,,,, the mutual yelling at the tv,,,,,,, threatening the lives of fictional characters,,,,,,, talking over whole dialogue scenes because you had a brilliant rewrite in mind and jeonghan simply couldn't resist the way you looked when there was an earnestness in your eyes and an opinion on your lips,,,,

it was quite late, indeed, before you even knew it. and when you switched the tv to a music video you really wanted to show jeonghan, the autoplay sort of took over, and your mind sort of shut down... drifted off to sleep.

— you woke up at some point in the early morning; the sound of the lock clicking and the door opening wasn't the sound you were used to, in your apartment two doors down, and it was just enough to snap you awake momentarily, still half in dream yet with one foot in reality.

it was just shua and jun, and they whispered an apology before padding off to their respective rooms (jun his own, shua his shared room with hannie), clearly worn out from their gaming activities.

— but that little push to semi-wakefulness was just enough for you to take stock of where you were, and you noticed belatedly that jeonghan had never left to go back to his room. you were both sleeping on the couch, legs intertwined; jeonghan was resting his head on your shoulder and your hands were reaching out, as if almost to give him a subconscious hug.

— the embarrassment ran through your nervous system almost instantly, and when you made to slowly and gently move your limbs so you were less... interwoven, jeonghan stirred and, still sleeping, pulled you back towards him. perhaps even closer than before.

you couldn't help yourself. a giggle escaped you; perhaps half nerves, mostly endearment. jeonghan stirred again and the sound and you covered your mouth, not wanting to wake him.

he stilled soon enough, and before drifting off again, you kissed him on the forehead.

— when you fully woke up the next morning, jeonghan had already began his day, but he didn't even try to hide the fact that the both of you had unwittingly unlocked a new feature in this friendship of yours. he sort of just... took the night prior as a confirmation that cuddling was on the list of approved actions and refused to let go of you, after.

not that it bothered you, of course.

it just seemed that the butterflies in your stomach were given wild energy at this new development; all your strategies for calming them suddenly ineffective.

AND IT WAS ALL YELLOW (CONT.) ☄. *. ⋆

— so.

if you had asked jeonghan at any point in his life if he were good at manipulating, his answer would be an unequivocable yes.

deceit? of course.

scheming? obviously.

lying? naturally.

blackmailing? most assuredly.

gaslighting, gatekeeping, girlbossing? undoubtedly.

changing criteria? yes.

moving goalposts? clearly.

hiding the apparent? well...

— see, the thing is... you get so good at the others that concealing the obvious isn't exactly necessary. everyone might know to be wary of the scheming, cheating, self-serving yoon jeonghan, but it didn't change the fact that he was so astute at the rest of it, image didn't exactly matter.

and besides, why save face when it was so fun to see people accuse him of what they were all very aware?

— so yes, jeonghan was quite skilled at all manner of deception. the one facet he was not so adept in was hiding his feelings toward the matter.

— thus, it should be no surprise that everyone and their mother knew jeonghan had a crush.

and it was only getting worse.

— don't ask jun when he put the dots together — he was more emotionally intellectual than he let on most of the time — and don't ask joshuji when either — that fucker had this quirk where he joked about something before it had real honest basis, but in some way only attributed to the gift of clairvoyance, he always seemed to be right. if you were to ask joshua, he'd likely recall the first time he had looked at jeonghan and wiggled his eyebrows and call that he knew then (he didn't; at least, not really).

— as for s.coups... well, don't ever ask cheol anything about jeonghan. he'd rather die than give it to you straight.

please. when he could embarrass jeonghan? seungcheol lives for that shit.

after all, what else are older brothers for?

— so yes, it was obvious to those close to him that jeonghan was in the long-suffering limbo of Having A Thing For Your Best Friend But Not Acting On It, and it had been apparent for months.

— after all, it felt like centuries ago that joshua had offered to play matchmaker for jeonghan and you — the veritable apple of his eye — and set the two of you up on a date.

it had been some lazy morning and jun nearly spit out his breakfast.

"you'd both love it! i'd get jihoon to play something romantic on the violin; well, maybe recorder—"

cue jun choking once more.

"and you could be there waiting in full suit and tie."

"with couples rings waiting in the bread basket." and joshua's eyes went comically and maniacally wide at jun's inclusion.

"ah, cheol would crash any date like that."

"but then y/n could get his blessing!"

— at some point, jun was at his wits end.

in his defense, it was him who had to see the two of you be all sweet and love-struck all the time, giggling and teasing each other on his couch in his apartment while all he's trying to do is eat a sorry excuse of a subway sandwich (eat fresh.) before jetting off to his internship again.

if you had to see that shit while eating soggy bread you'd be annoyed, too.

one more "aigoooo" while jeonghan squishes your cheeks, and you bat him away with a roll of your eyes and jun would take a knife out of the block behind him.

— especially when jeonghan started calling you "angel" at every chance he got. had jun's eye twitching, it did. never had he regretted getting roommates until jeonghan fell in love.

one day jun learned that the phrase "get a room" made at least one of you self conscious enough to at least tone it down, and he never stopped weaponizing it, since.

— of course, overtime jun's protests became background noise, but once, when your roommates and jeonghan's all went to the museum of fine arts together to celebrate the end of finals week (it was free admission so long as you had your svtu activities card), jun had deadpanned his new favorite phrase in the middle of the outdoor conversation area. jeonghan had turned to you grinning, like it was the excuse he'd been waiting for all day, and after a lighthearted "shall we?" you grabbed his hand and the two of you pranced off to explore the sculpture terrace.

jeonghan had raised an eyebrow at your choice of exhibit, but you pulled him over to a sculpture of a human figure with black wings and flashed a smile: “it’s not a private room, but i think it works.”

“if you’d prefer it, i’m sure there’s a custodial closet we could go to instead. i bet there's one right outside, even.”

you snorted. “and if i did kiss you? what would you do then?"

— you stunned him into silence. him. yoon jeonghan. 

— right as he was about to recover and shoot back some smartass comment, you laughed — the sound clear and playful, bright and radiating with warmth — and then you wandered to where they showcased student work.

— umm... uhhh... WHATTHEFUCKWEREYOUDOING WHATTHEFUCKWASGOINGONNNNNN

“angel.”

you hummed absentmindedly, only half hearing jeonghan through the internal screaming reverberating in your skull.

“y/nnnnnnnnnnnnnnn…”

he was closer now, if you focused, you were sure you could feel him, inching closer, right behind you, just to your right…

— he kissed your cheek: half on the corner of your lips, half on the soft of your skin.

— you couldn’t help yourself. you turned.

“if you were bold enough to kiss me here, i’d kiss you back. then i’d be scandalized, ‘how forward!’”

your mouth opened: in shock, in delight, in laughter, in a heavenly mix of the three. jeonghan just stood there, all self-satisfied grin.

“you could waste your time finding a comeback, or you could be forward.”

“i think i have time for both.”

☄. *. ⋆

end of file .

SVT (sophrosyne; virtù; truth) University hopes you've enjoyed your stay !

[aegagrusscholarship]

every terminal i've offhandedly referenced in oc lore on discord with my friends. because i am normal.

random facts below the cut:

jerry: one of a few terminals originally put down in hell by a private company (hi @frostaxolotl it's the guys who did project obsidian). kept records and eventually uploaded them onto the network at large. located in a cave in wrath. pronouns whatever he doesn't care

sal: mad scientist type beat. helped another terminal develop a way to upload itself into another machine on the condition that they could do whatever with the result once the other terminal was done. uses said code to shove viruses onto machines that hook up to them for cybergrinding, just to see what happens. really really really likes fish. has a salmon with legs shimeiji on their screen at all times. someone dumped a labcoat on them once and it hasn't been moved since. located in an industrial building in one of the warzones of violence. they/it

69: pirated a lot of media for the terminal network back when they'd been abandoned by humanity, but humanity was still, y'know, alive. and the internet was therefore still online. refuses to let anyone repair her for whatever reason. located in the mouth of hell. she/her

TT: one of the terminals that kept the hell network's internet gateway up and running. eventually paid a random passing machine in points to paint her. okay look she's just rose homestuck except ultrakill edition. located in/near a cathedral of limbo. she/her

cloud: it's a joke on cloud storage and that is all you need to know. organizes and files all the data/files that have been shared to the terminal network as a whole. also archives any data that other terminals do not want to host on themselves anymore, so a lot of its memory is dedicated to random reports that no one actually cares about. located on one of the boardwalks in wrath, close by to a cabin. it/he/they

duck: one of the terminals behind getting the hell network internet access. too far away from the surface physically to do it himself though, so he just sends programs and theory to terminals who can actually get reception. almost always has ascii art on his screen instead of the tip of the day. located near the bottom of limbo, in a carpeted hall of a cathedral. she/he

miku: yes they're named after that miku. likes vocaloid (duh). particularly lonely and is more likely to strike up a conversation with passing machines than they are to actually do any terminal functions. located in a building in lust that should be an insanely high-traffic zone, but everyone and their mother realizes that and so most machines actually avoid it to minimize risk. this, paradoxically, makes said building one of the least-visited areas, which also means that miku has very little interaction ever. they/she

irukandji: judgy asshole who insulted the terminal mentioned above (the one that decided to download itself into another machine to explore hell on its own). thanks @salt216000 located in gluttony somewhere fleshy, hence all the blood. nameself pronouns ++ it/its

[automaticheartcrusade]

Here’s my Cinderella’s Castle review under the cut! Please keep in mind, number one, these are more general thoughts than an in depth review, I’ve only seen the show once for now. There will be an in depth character analysis post some other time! And I’ll say it now that I enjoyed it, so most of the stuff I’ll be talking about are small criticisms. Number two, these opinions may change, but they are mine, and you are free to feel whatever way you want towards the show! Please no hate! Also I am not organized so this will come off as rambling lol just an fyi!

So to sum it all up in general, I enjoyed it, but I wished it was longer. The first thing that shocked me was learning that the runtime was only 2 hours, compared to the Hatchetfield stage shows which were mainly 2 hours and 30 minutes. And after really thinking it over, I feel like this show would have benefited more if it had that extra half an hour, cause certain things either feel rushed or lack exploration/depth. When I finished it, I was thinking “this was really good, but at the same time, I expected way more, and I wish there was more”.

Due to the shortened runtime, I came out of the project underwhelmed, and I’ll go into depth about that regarding the characters, so let’s talk about them! In general, the characters are amazing. They’re all either lovable or funny, and I love all of their personalities. But something that I think this show lacks is more character focus, or more so…characters bouncing off of each other, specifically regarding Ella, Crumb, and Sir Hop a lot and I’ll tell you what I mean by that. Now, there are 4 REALLY good scenes that do have character bouncing in the show. The first one is Ella and her two childhood friends talking about boys and reminiscing of the old days, the next is the stepmother and her daughters talking and arguing as they eat at the table, the third is that small moment where Sir Hop a lot is teaching Crumb to use his sword correctly, and the fourth is the scene Ella shares with Tadius.

These are all great scenes of characters interacting with each other that have nothing to do with the plot, but more so to show the audience what these characters are like when they’re just breathing. Think back to Emma telling Paul about her sister and them talking about when they were in school, or Ethan telling Hannah he’s got to trust her and that her mother should realize that he needs to do better. The Langs are REALLY good at that, but here I felt like it was lackluster. The stepsisters, (as hilarious, batshit, and iconic their scenes were to watch) end up taking way too much screen time, to the point where they kinda overshadow Ella at times in my opinion, and I could say the same for the prince and Tadius. Both the stepsisters screen time and Tadius and the Prince scenes are really funny and good character interactions, but they go by a little too long to the point where I was thinking “come on, you could have shortened this to focus on Ella herself more”. And despite having depth and being written well, Ella’s arc feels rushed. Her going from wanting revenge to wanting to protecting the kingdom is a good writing decision, but her change of viewpoint happens too fast for me. Ella ended up lacking more exploration for me in general due to most of the focus being on the trolls and/or too many exposition dialogue dumps. Even “Neon”, for how much it slapped, could have been cut out and replaced with something more important, cause it doesn’t serve any character focused purpose on Ella’s part. Funny enough, at the same time I felt like the show could have done more with some lore stuff too. Like I wish we learned more about Ella’s parents and her relationship with them, or more about the fairy queen/crumb and sir hop a lot, basically any character or event that didn’t revolve around the troll sister’s and the prince.

Then there’s Sir hop and lot and Crumb, and it was disappointing to discover that they’re kinda barley in it. The marketing had me thinking they would be two main characters right next to Ella, but they’re not. They have at best, 2-3 scenes. I was hoping we would get more scenes of them bonding with Ella as well, even hoping for the three of them to sing a song together, which them not singing one was fine ofc, but their trio friendship needed more buildup and focus in my opinion. With that said, the scenes they shared together were really cute! Everyone really killed their roles, and I was obsessed with most of the songs and the costuming. You can tell their was so much passion put into this project.

I think for me, what holds the show back is it’s runtime, exposition/lack of character focus in some areas, and some elements not being used enough to its advantage. And I want to make this 100% clear, I do not think the writing was bad nor do I think the show itself was bad. I had a VERY fun time and I am VERY proud of Starkid. It’s funny, and it’s emotional. I think overall this is a decent introduction to the Lands That Are and future projects, which is why I wanted to provide some feedback so the writing in the future can be even better. I plan to rewatch the show a bunch of times and even make fanart when the time comes, and ofc…make more in depth posts about my thoughts on this show. But for now I give it a 6/10. I wish the team the best and I cannot wait to see what they have in store for this world moving forward!

[wyvchard]

A short moment.

Reginald walked in his agent's office, looking for them as they wandered off to R&D once more to see the glowsticks.

He paused, eyes focusing on two notes on top of the paperweight they bought during the time they went to India. There was a folder under the notes, sealed and clearly addressed to R&D.

The writing in the first note was unlike the typical way his agent 'writes'. Just like their files when writing after the volcano and they were banned from using their implant.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It has been proven that with enough practice, one can use telekinesis with enough dexterity to write from a pen. However, due to the sample size of one, the feasibility of all agents with the telekinetic implant obtaining this ability is still unknown.

More experimental units may be needed for this. Actually, it may be a matter of 'must' than 'may'.

The effect of incrementally adding more weights to enhance the ability is still up for debate because the control group does not exist. And probably never will.

Should I just bring this up to R&D?

I'm rambling on my notes again. Great. Why does it sound like I'm writing a draft for a project proposal anyway? I'm planning to burn this in case I decide to drop this idea.

Wrote in the margins again. Yay! I need a new notepad. Preferably one with lines this time.

... I probably won't pursue this path since I find it hard to talk to the other agents. Would a cupcake or some wine be enough compensation for this?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To R&D: You have not requested this package. This does not contain any traps or sabotage. Contained in this envelope is a folder and a project proposal. The aftermath of Project; KBOOM tipped the scales to this path. Please do be patient as I did not have a copy of the format you use in your laboratories or memos. A lot of the data compiled here is based on anecdotal evidence.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two knocks broke Reginald from his trance, causing him to turn towards the door.

"Agent? What is this?"

Phoenix showed Reginald a lined notepad sheet after using their TK to write on the surface with practiced ease.

A project proposal with data in it.

"For what, exactly?"

I want to know if my feat with telekinesis back at the volcano was a fluke or not. To see if the way I trained my telekinesis did anything. I got a few hypothesis but I want to be sure.

"And you didn't think to inform me?"

I didn't think it would amount to anything. I was just making sure I was keeping track on how I was playing around with my TK and tracking my master over it.

"It occasionally skips my mind that if you weren't a field agent, you could have been in R&D."

"I have my reasons." Phoenix merely smiled as they grabbed the folder and the second note, pocketing the first note in order to (what Reginald presumes) burn it.

@phoenix-and-found-family, I made have a little lore dump for you. Hope you like it.

[hizznbyte]

is there any lore about neri/neni/your sona? id like to know more about them :D

Oh heck yeah! I’d be happy to talk about it [but be warned, once I start talking I’ll never stop..]

Nerium/Neri, the weird hijabi cat you might see everywhere on my blog is my main persona/mascot and basically just an artistic representation of myself, so anything that applies to them also applies to me LOL.

Neri is genderfluid/nonbinary and fluctuates with using any pronouns! It doesn’t really care about labels and is, truthfully, just a creature. An entity if you will. He doesn’t enjoy the idea of being perceived and prefers to be a background character. Neni is what I call that stupid chibi version of him with the big ass eyes. His design is always changing cuz I’m never satisfied sighh.

She has the social, navigational, and life skills of a toddler [that is to say, she can’t really do anything right]. She’s pretty slow and clumsy, always stumbling around and losing a constant battle with the world [he is not gods strongest soldier] Also, he’s an insomniac, so I often draw him with eye bags. Neri would prefer to stay indoors and sleep until noon, but he’s got work to do and is something of a procrastinator.

One of the most important things about Nerium is that they are kind of state of like? Mental disassociation? Their mind is so fractured and split that it kind of manifests as these multiple alter egos or personalities? Typewriter/Type being one of these. I call them PersoNeris :3

Typewriter is the more serious, stoic, work oriented one and is the biggest perfectionist ever. Constant resting bitch face. A bit of an ass. I made this comparison before but he’s kinda like the Inner Critic to Nerium LOL

As for Noodle… that’s what I call the ugly tiny little doodle version of Neri. The Neri Doodle. Noodle if you will… Typewriter has a version of the Noodle called a Toodle! Their designs are meant to simple and drawn super quickly so I don’t waste time on details [Noodle specifically doesn’t have arms unless absolutely necessary, then it just appears out of thin air!]

I will say, Nerium doesn’t have much “lore” [as in, fictitious story lore] because like I said, he’s just an over exaggerated version of me. However!

[I know you probably didn’t ask but I enjoy yapping] Since maybe… four or five years I’ve been working on this original world building project called Blood Magic, and it is so dear and special to me and I could talk about the lore all day long. I’ve spent countless hours working and writing stuff for this story I’m sorry I get annoying about them. Basic rundown is that there are two gods -an author and an illustrator- called the Higherups, a council known only as the overseers, a tribe of demons and angels [typical fantasy story shtuff], a planet I dubbed Planet Nerium inhabited by humans, animals and… furries..

The two main characters are the false-protagonist/antagonist type character named Trinity -Trick- Ambrose and a furry cat protagonist named Trip Sterling. I’ve drawn and posted about Trip before! My daughter!

Blood Magic is split into two “seasons”, each with multiple acts. There’s BM: Total Anarchy and BM: The Heart Keeps Beating [TA and THKB for short]. The idea is to turn this into maybe a series of novels or some sorta indie animated series? We’ll see.

I’ll save the lore dumping for some other time, but only if yall are interested XD

Thanks for the ask anony!!

[connorsnothereeither]

Hi I request knowledge about guardians in relation to telchins/guardians on fable and figured you'd be the best person to ask? (Sry if not)

Basically, how were the guardians created? I know one of the books mentioned that the elder guardians are a mutation; are guardians living creatures the telchins? I know that they're supposedly machine in Minecraft lore but- If guardians are living creatures, how were they created? Splicing, like with other things? Something else? Do we know how the elder guardians evolved, or is that something I can make up? Anything you can tell me helps!

Hullo!! I might not be the best person since I think the Guardian lore was established before I joined, so it wouldn’t hurt to also check with Ocie, Metta or Heyhay somewhere, BUT I do know a good chunk that I can hopefully help out with! :D

The guardians (Project Argus) were developed after the failure of Project Aiakos (the conduits). The conduits were stationary, and easy to get past, so they needed something living. Something moving, and able to selectively target the drowned.

Initial attempts at creating the guardians were surgical, frankensteining creatures together to make something singular that could work (that’s why Ulysses, a surgeon, was initially brought into the projects). However, as the project went on, it became clear that genetic splicing was more effective at consistently selecting traits on a larger scale. They were selectively designed, grown and bred to be an effective army, functioning as a hive, with their sole purpose being to detect and kill drowned.

However, the telchin never managed to properly develop intelligence. They couldn’t create sentience. So they ended up with a multiplying population of creatures that were impossible to kill, and even harder to train.

The first signs of mutation (which was inevitable given how overly manipulated the guardian DNA was) developed in the senses designed to detect drowned. By that time in the war, most of the drowned were the bodies of dead telchin, and the guardians were no longer able to tell the difference between a dead telchin, and a living one, turning against their creators.

The guardians are living creatures, initially genetically mutated and engineered, with subsequent mutations perpetuating through breeding among the artificially created population. As far as I know, there is no specific lore on how the elder guardians evolved/mutated, so I think you’re more than free to make that up/interpret it how you like!

I hope this was helpful in some way! It’s more of a lore dump from the telchin side of things than like, scientific details on anything haha, a lot of the telchin lore works on “fantasy science” rules where we make it as scientific as we can and then smudge the details a little lol. If there’s anything you wanted me to clarify let me know! :D

[pumpkinsy0]

OMG HI!!! I’ve been reading ur blog for the past hour and I’m absolutely thrilled to see it lol. I’ve always been a big papercut shipper and seeing other people ship them is a dream come true for my 13 year old self. I wanted to dump some of my headcanons for the outsiders/S.E Hinton Verse mostly because it’s so rare to find people who also like it

I personally see most of the greasers as white. Mostly because of what type of greaser culture the book describes, it’s leant towards white kids back then in the 60s rather than kids of color. But I’ve never seen the Shepards as white. It’s just never something I’ve seen. I grew on a block where everyone raised eachothers kids, as we grew older we joked we were one big mixed family. Ive always see the shepards as that Mexican-American family that I spent my after schools with while my parents were busy.  But that could totally be me projecting Idk

for Johnny I’ve always pictured him as mixed. Probably African American-Italian. He’s described with features that look like people of that heritage look and in my opinion it’s probably one of the main reasons he was targeted. 

For Two-bit I’ve always seen him as a super pasty, always sun-burnt white boy who is super into his European heritage. Like this man can’t deal with school but he’ll do deep dives on Scottish mythology and Vikings any day of the week.

Steve definitely has always looked like he does in the movie to me. He’s definitely a hillbilly, I have cousins who act exactly like him and it’s absolutely hilarious because the deep southern accent just makes them not understandable. I’ve personally viewed Steve having that deep accent and also having a lisp (wowza I’m just projecting on him lol) so no one understands him besides from Soda and the older women who come to the DX.

I’ve always viewed Dally as Italian also but he is the type that can not tan to save his life. His nearly white blonde hair is not just from the bleach he puts on it but from running around in the sun all day every day. There is this one artist that draws him like a gremlin that I love I’m pretty sure their @ is something among the lines of crow1121? I can’t find rn and it’s killing me lol. But the other artist is @/ nutsackx and I absolutely love their interpretation of the gang 

Honestly with the Curtis’s I love ur interpretation of them being Arab-American but my little projecting heart (wow I do that a lot) always have viewed them as a German-Jewish and Romani as that’s what my family is and they lived very similar lives back in the 60s. It’s a small little head cannon I’ve always had and I’ve always held onto for the Curtis family. I can’t ever view them as non-immigrants tho. 

Sorry this is so long sweetie. I just got super caught up in rambling and your blog really inspired me 🫶

HELLLOOOOO!!! glad u found this blog!!! we r all here for funsies and just doing whatever, glad to have u onboard<333

OKOK NOW LOOK☝🏽☝🏽i knooowwww SE Hinton wrote the outsiders w everyone but johnny being white in mind, but honestly i think what makes me change them some of em into poc instead is just bc i want to and its fun to me!!!! tbh, i like having different ideas on characters than others, plus part of it is just inspired by the ppl around me!!! at the very least tho, i do tryyyyyy to make it more historically accurate so its not like i just SHOVED them in there and i dont get 100% attacked by the “this isnt historically accurate grrrr” brigade, for example my haitian shepards, at the end of the day its mostly a self projection but i do have lore for them as to y theyre even in oklahoma, yknow??? doing things like that is fun to me!!!

WHEN IT COMES TO THE SHEPARDS, i will say, whenever i would see white shepards im like “oh i thought we all saw that they were poc guys</333” EVEN W THE MOVIE i was surprised tim wasnt a poc but whateverrrr we move onnnnn

BUT I DO LIKE UR ETHNICITY IDEAS!!!!, once again ANOTHER version of the characters put into my little multiverse right there w arab curtis family<3333

personally i hc dally to b italian, but considering the demographics of brooklyn back then, yea it is 100% possible he couldve been italian, and w johnny to me hes mexican/bengali, so i think its pretty cool that u see them as both being italian, im def rockin w it, it gives them something they can connect over a bit!!

and im happy to say we both see the curtis’ as being jewish, to me theyre ethnically jewish, i based the curtis’ off my gf im ngl

BUT ANYWAYS NO WORRIES!!! i love answering long asks and so happy my blog inspired u to share ur thoughts<333

[niseag-arts]

Artemis lore dump

I'm doing these now appearently (this one is going to be funky because there's two distinct versions of artemis. I will give you the one that most closely follows 40K canon) >Artemis B-20-A

Origin: Artemis was created by Archmagos Biologis Hieronymous XIV of forgeworld Repleator. They were vat grown based on Hieronymous' own DNA. Artemis does not know this, Hieronymous has not told them, and there is not enough flesh left on the archmagos for physical similarities to show up. Hieronymous also does not treat Artemis like his child, but rather like a promising apprentice. Hieronymous, personally, does not see artemis as his offspring either, more like a project. but that's for a hieronymous loredump if we ever get to that. Artemis is a psyker of some variety, though not in a way that the imerium really knows what to do with. They have an uncanny affinity for machinery, to the point where they can influence the machines around them with mere thought, unaided by augmentation. The leading hypothesis/belief along the techpriests around Artemis is that Artemis has absorbed (part of) the machine spirit of the vat they were grown in, changing the way the young adept has developed. History: Artemis was lab-grown and enrolled in the mechanicus from the moment they drew their first breath. Their creator (Hieronymous) did not interfere with their early life, instead handing Artemis over to a vat-priest to be raised among vat-born skitarii. Thus that is how they were raised until they were 6, and could officially become an acolyte of the cult mechanicus. They started their training by following around low-ranking techpriests and helping them out in whatever way a 6-year-old can, spending free time wandering Repleator's bio-forges... and nicking fruits from the machines, to relish in how much better they tasted than the Skitarii rations they were brought up with. The forgemaster was aware of this, and would occasionally scold the little thief, but other times he would pretend not to see the small child nestled in between the processing machines, and the sticky handprints all around the forge. At night they would still be with the vatpriest and whichever of their skitarii brethren had not been deployed yet. I should probably point out that the relationship between artemis and the skitarii has always been strained, due to the undeniable differences between them. As Artemis grew up more and more, Hieronymous became more and more present in their life as well, acting as a teacher and officially agreeing to tutoring the "promising young adept" around the time Artemis turned 12. This is also around the time artemis recieved their first augmentation, a mechadendrite, after begging for it excessively. From there, Artemis has been Hieronymous' loyal student, alert and devoted to the cause. they have also moved into Hieronymous quarters, where they live and sleep most of the time. Their unique abilities being helpful, but not in a way that stands out to the others. After a few years, however, artemis requested a private sanctum, which was granted. This request came from how overwhelming it was for Artemis to be surrounded by machines at all times, while artemis loves to hear what they describe as "the omnissiah's song", and to sense the machine spirits around, sometimes a human wants some peace and quiet. On orders of Hieronymous, a small room was furnished with an altar and prayer mats, as well as a simple bed, for Artemis to use. It is far away from the main forges, tucked into a corner near some rooms mostly used for meetings and consultation, but it is perfect for Artemis' needs. A note on personality: Artemis is extremely devoted to the Omnissiah, which is only strengthened by their affinity for machinery. However, they are not as inclined to "righteous violence" as one might expect. Rather, Artemis considers themself to be a scholar first and foremost, in all matters, and is likely approach situations with curiosity rather than outright judgement. That said, xenos and chaos are very scary and artemis does not want to be caught at the wrong end of someone else's gun, so when these things come up they might mask their distrust and fear with snide remarks and rudeness. as always, feel free to ask things if you wanna!

[vivisols]

can you just lore dump for Ash? I don’t have any specific questions right now but i need ASH LORE

YEAHHHHHHHHH ABSOLUTELY 😁😁😁😁😁

ash is the second oldest of 5. they’re also the first person in their family to study sciences as a career! while getting their degree, they worked as a waiter in a popular restaurant for a bit :3

of course, when ash was sought out for an internship with fazco themselves, they were overjoyed. fazco had been highly regarded for their past research and studies into mers before, and since merfolk had always fascinated ash, they’d been more than happy to accept.

when sun and moon were clearly recognized as the first of AEMPEP to be classified as ‘successes’, ash was…. conflicted. considering how little anyone, fazco or otherwise, knew about mers, they didn’t quite know about how they should go about raising them. but they tried their best regardless.

AEMPEP, a project that started as a mere ‘what if’ in the background and was barely given any attention, had become fazco’s prime selling point. ash, the person who was directly responsible for it, quickly became respected for their work. they’ve published several books and numerous studies about it.

clover has been a big part in their life. even if ash had always been working when they could. ash and clover have known each other for 8 years, been together romantically for 5, and engaged for 2.

nowadays, ash spends all of their time in their tank or in a small pool talking to clover. they miss sun and moon. despite everything, they hope that they’re okay. they really understand why they left now.

ash definitely was attached to them, especially towards the end. sometimes they tell clover that they wish they could have done better. maybe if they were just a little smarter, a little kinder, a little more competent— then they could have done this years ago. they have could understood sun and moon and be in the ocean with them now too.

they have a lot of regrets and definitely a lot of guilt. but they can only change and do so little now.

[beskar33]

More ranting about my cringe little gay ass stories sorryyy

Why I'm hesitant to post the majority of my BoBev writing despite yapping about it constantly is because after years of just drafting scenes I liked to think about and being really autistic about SW, most of it kind of became an interconnecting, very much still ongoing story that could honestly fill a book. And I've had a LOT of fun poring over useless lore and pulling my hair out over wikis and schematics for hours to challenge myself to make it feel like it could actually fit somewhere into the existing universe while also weaving in my own ideas and being written in my own style, without any of the limitations that an official SW author would have.

I'm also really autistic about Greek classics and there's nothing I love more than reading or writing like 700 pages about a person's whole fucking life wrapped in hubris and bloodshed and tragedy.

BoBev has been my number one comfort project for years where it really is just for me and I never intended for anyone else to even know about it at first. It's my little practice arena for stylization or themes I've never explored in other writing. It's also one of my fave places to daydream lol.

So that's led to a lot of it being...not very interesting to the average reader 💔 a lot of scenes I had SO much fun writing require so much prior context that they lose the flow or effect when posted by themselves. Bev has like 30+ years worth of lore that has nothing to do with Boba. He's a self-insert, but also is fully his own person with his own storyline that's distanced from shipping because that's not what he was originally created for, if that makes any sense.

The couple of things I've shared on here are cuts from the story or rough versions of scenes that I've since rewritten or tweaked a hundred times lol.

And I'll be honest; I'm really, REALLY afraid to bore everyone with massive lore dumps or whatever lol. I cringe at myself a lot when I think about how much time I've sunk into a project that's so stupidly self-indulgent instead of working on fully original drafts I might actually be able to publish someday.

Idk. All this to say that a lot of selfship fic writers on here are just so fuckin good at writing fluffy scenes where the blorbos kiss and that's that! Or like...a normal length story that's easy to read or get into even if I don't know much about the characters or world. I'm envious of that! My brain doesn't work that way. It's a completely different skill set that I actually struggle with because I just want to build and build until I'm neck-deep in a whole novel. I hate to feed y'all scraps, but I guess because this project is so close to my heart, I'm insecure that the quality doesn't come close to the effort I put into it. And very aware that the way I write fics in general is not what most people on here are interested in! So I post stuff I know for a fact isn't my best to kind of cushion myself against the criticism or the awkwardness of posting the most boring passion project ever worked on...

Hello? Hello? It's so dark in here.

[sparkknightella]

Mild Hexenzirkel Lore Dump/Random Things I’ve noticed in The Mage’s Tea Party vid

So as we all have seen, there is this pretty pretty little image of 8 witches that appear at the start of the video

At first I was going to try to match up each Cameo with a known member, but there really is not enough to go on. Especially considering both Alice and Andersdotter appear to use the Bottom Left Cameo on their teacup and ink bottle respectively.

I could just not be seeing it correctly because they are very small, but it definitely looks like it’s the woman holding her book in both of them, not the two different emblems of witches with books.

Literally no idea what this could mean but now i’m very confused about the point of the 8 emblems at all.😭

NOW TO THE FUN PART

Each member that spoke seemed to have a special little flash of art during Alice’s last little speech.

I’ve included them in the order they appear as she’s speaking. I’m assuming they match up with each member in the order they started speaking in the video. Meaning the first represents Alice, the second represents I. Ivonova N., the third is Rhinedottir, fourth is Andersdottor, and the final one is Barbeloth.

Each painting has a witch motif somewhere, EXCEPT Andersdottor. Keep this in mind

Alice’s is interesting because she is HATLESS, unlike the other witches shown in these paintings. She appears to be gazing at something descending on Teyvat with a giant stack of papers beside her. Maybe she witnessed the Twin’s fall to Teyvat while she up late working on an early edition of the Teyvat travel guide?? who knows.

I. Ivonova N.’s seems straight forward until you realize there is a second witch in the background. This second witch is drawn with a different outline which leads me to believe she could be an illusion of some kind. Maybe the real Ivonova is projecting a fake Ivonova to see if her love will come back?? maybe to see if there’s an assassin after her? again, who knows!

Now Rhinedottir’s had me thinking THOUGHTS. Is Rhinedottir the witch flying by in the background? or the little girl with fierce braids?? I have no idea what kind of conclusions to draw from this.

ANDERSDOTTOR… I spent a good 10 minutes trying to find the witch and I simply cannot. Maybe Andersdottor was the only member who genuinely had no magical or elemental abilities or proficiencies. Maybe she was just a simple mortal, who’s allegorical retellings of the world led to her being invited into the Hexenzirkel. We do know she’s one of the only canonically DEAD members. Her painting shows the main characters from The Boar Princess.

and finally, Barbeloth. Not much to say, big hat, clearly astrological. Mona’s master blah blah. Clearly some of these were more fun than others

Anywho, i’ve been watching Genshin Lore videos all day and not a single Hexenzirkel video mentioned these really cool paintings included at the end and their clear connection to the stories of these witches!!! I hope someone sees this and starts thinking big thoughts with me!!

[askallianything]

((OOC POST))

More Allister lore dump!!

since I'm roleplaying as her now, I thought it'd be helpful to share a little more about Alli! and I'll be doing it in a questions nobody asked and answer format!

In what way is Alli a self insert?

Well for starters, she has the same name as me. Honestly it was just supposed to be a placeholder name but I've grown attached to it. Alli was originally based on me, but she's kinda evolved into her own character. Now it's more like I project myself onto her as a baseline.

What's Alli's family like?

She doesn't remember! Alli had her memory of her family wiped by Nadja (her vampookie). She was never close with them and nor were they close to her. I swear it's not because i can't decide on a "before-ghoul" backstory for her!!! And for those wondering, her last name is "Doe". Which was also meant to just be a placeholder name but once again, it stuck with me

How does Alli's stigma work?

As mentioned in my other lore posts about her, her stigma allows her to compel living things. This works on plants, animals, and living anomalies. Her stigma works better on targets with low-intelligence. Her stigma is pretty resistable, which is why it doesn't work too well on people. Anything with willpower can fight against her control. The incantation for her stigma is "ialan".

What was Alli and Nadja's relationship like?

It was fairly good despite the power dynamic between vampiress and mortal. Nadja cared for Alli, but more so like how someone would care for a pet. imbalanced power dynamics is a recurring thing within Alli's relationships. Alli wished for Nadja to turn her into a vampire, and Nadja agreed as long as Alli vowed herself to her. She agreed, but Nadja was staked before they could go through with the wedding.

What was Nadja like?

Nadja was basically the opposite of Ed. She wasn't a very powerful vampire, but she cared a lot for humans and the relationship between them and anomalies. Nadja worked hard to convince The Institute to adapt a more "pro-anomaly" mindset.

Alli's past relationships?

She's only been in two official relationships. Before Nadja, there was Mori. Mori was a zombie, and by proxy, an anomaly. Alli took care of him behind The Institute's back. I haven't really fleshed out this part of her backstory much, but basically because of her relationship with Mori, she developed "acts of service" as a love language. But not in the healthiest way. She believes that when people owe her, they can easily repay her with affection (be it platonic or more), even if they don't like her. This "affection" is what drives her.

What's Alli's bond with Kithy like?

Alli sees Kithy as her son, and Kithy sees Alli as his mom. Alli is convinced that when she found Kithy, it was a sign from "the mighty lord Cthulhu". What kind of sign? Who knows! Things happened and now she believes in a fictional god. Alli takes good care of Kithy and loves him a lot as if he really was her son.

Kithy is a lot like Calamari in both appearance and intelligence. However, Kithy is green. And has bat wings. And he's smarter (in theory). Due to Alli not being a responsible parent when she first found Kithy, hes now a degenerate iPad kid who watches elsagate and veiwfarm channels. Alli is a little disappointed in her eight-legged son, but she still loves him anyways.

More Kithy lore!!!

Why does she like reptiles so much?

Why not? Reptiles are cool. and she just naturally bonds with them easily. She's also a good match for them since many reptiles are venomous or poisonous and shes immune to most toxins. On the contrary - Alli is absolutely terrified of marsupials. As an order of animals, they hate her and actively are out to get her. She works fine with all other kinds of animals. It just sorta happened through roleplay, but she's also incompetent when it comes to supervising animals. She takes good care of the animals under her care... she just can't keep them out of trouble.

Alrighty, I think that's enough lore for now! I'm starting to get finger cramps....

[caltropspress]

RAPS + CRAFTS #26: Nakama.

1. Introduce yourself. Past projects? Current projects?

Peace to all the cognitive conduits out there, I’m Nakama. (yes with the period). NY born and bred artist of varying media and sectors. Word to my loves near and far, visible and not. I’m always making things, sometimes purposeful, sometimes superfluous. I also make the beats for said things, like, 94% of the time. So unless otherwise stated, it’s me on everything.

Lots of past projects: (bodies of work under various pseudonyms, I used to go by the name ENxVE The Nameless Vagrant many moons ago, so there’s some remnants from that person on the internet somewhere, haha; two EPs, All Water and On Deck, with jazz/hip-hop septet Poetic Thrust; solo endeavors as Nakama. include Hohenheim’s Burden Pt. 1 - 9, human_error, [morning meditations], Free Up Space, etc.)

Did a collaborative album with the good homie Midi Neutron and many other amazing musicians, called ikeru, that dropped in March 2024. King Vision Ultra’s SHOOK WORLD still going dumb, peace to the PTP family.

Current solo project slate is the EVERYTHING BURNS! arc. Harkening to a collapsing dystopian playhouse for any enterprising soul who dares to be in entertainment at this moment in time. Really it’s a series of projects connected through an in-universe rapper eponymously named Nakama., and his relationship to a sentient AI he modeled to get rich off of ghost writing. (I’m big on lore, but I dare not say more.)

The arc started with KINDLING_ in August of 2023, and I just dropped the next installment of the series, EMBERGO_, this month [May, 2024]. Slide on that expeditiously, there’s more en route.

2. Where do you write? Do you have a routine time you write? Do you discipline yourself, or just let the words come when they will? Do you typically write on a daily basis?

I usually write at home, or in transit. But the world is so wild and synchronous that I could write anywhere, off the strength of observation and some pattern recognition. 

Definitely find myself writing in the laaaateeee night/early mornings. Somewhere between being so mentally cooked that the words are a babbling river, and being actually sufficiently rested enough to form coherent, complete sentences. Depends on the day. I do discipline myself to a certain extent, as far as putting hard expectations on what I want a particular cadence to do, or how I want to tackle a topic. So I’ll do mad premeditation if it’s serious for me like that. 

But recently (the past year or so), I’ve been really enjoying finding a phrase or a prompt that I can reverse engineer into a full thought. Or sometimes, me or someone else will be talking and say something wild that I have to flip into a verse. On KINDLING_, the opening line of "lights out" (The goons misinterpreted the meaning of the booster shot…), was one such instance. It started as a joke at the expense of folks who were not jacking being vaccinated for absurd reasons, and I just wrote that down with no context. Then it started to grow bit by bit and I saw a larger idea to tend to, off that one little quip. Those instances happen more fluidly, as I’m listening and conversing, so that’s like, letting the words come when they will.

I do try to write every day. Not raps necessarily, but informal thoughts that could turn into raps if I like them enough. And journaling for when I gotta get in my therapy bag.

3. What’s your medium—pen and paper, laptop, on your phone? Or do you compose a verse in your head and keep it there until it’s time to record?

I do all of them, though phone is preferred at this point. I need that ability to move phrases and lines around quickly to test them as I write, so I usually reserve pen and paper for when a song is finalized and recorded, and I want a hard-copy to refer to in the future. 

And I did have a phase where I was just dumping any and every thought into the Notes app on my computer, but that was too chaotic – I’d come back days after like, “What the actual fuck am I talking about?”

4. Do you write in bars, or is it more disorganized than that?

It depends on the instrumental I’m working with and the first few lines I think of. I’ll go into more contemporary beats super measured and metronomic, to the point where I can’t avoid writing in bars. But when I’m working on more sparse, open arrangements or weird time signatures, I’ll lean into purposeful disorganization. Playing with end rhyme expectations, running a line way past the 4 then snap-correcting with a punctuated phrase of just a few words, etc. Various techniques at play, it really just falls down to what the song needs by my estimation.

5. How long into writing a verse or a song do you know it’s not working out the way you had in mind? Do you trash the material forever, or do you keep the discarded material to be reworked later?

NEVER TRASH IT. The amount of times I’ve reworked songs and beat sketches from YEARS prior that ended up becoming really important pieces to the narrative later, is innumerable. Being in the act of writing is different though. If something is actually ass I will definitely step away after a solid 30 minutes. If I don’t have a reasonable foundation, a topic, and at least one bar that makes me go “oooh that’s hard!” after 30 minutes, I know I’m forcing it and need to re-strategize. But I won’t just toss it, 'cause something was calling me to those terms in the way I chose to express them. So I just resign myself to try something else or give it a rest and step away from writing for a bit to re-center.

6. Have you engaged with any other type of writing, whether presently or in the past? Fiction? Poetry? Playwriting? If so, how has that mode influenced your songwriting?

I’ve certainly dabbled. Poetry is sort of inexorable from the process, as I mentioned, based on how I start pieces. But I used to write a lot of “proper” poetry in my youth, as well as some experiments in short stories. Most recently, I wrote and directed a piece called PLACES! (I clearly love all caps and exclamation points, haha), which was a combination of live music, scripted acting, improvisation and dance choreography presented as anti-hierarchical theater. It began as a short form poem I wrote for the Indypendent in 2023, called by an imperative I spoke of/speak with friends about, which invites reading as an activity to become increasingly communal. Where something that is considered uniquely personal and private can then be an invitation to read with friends and play the parts out actively, there was a power I became aware of in facilitating the internal and external views of shared space, specifically in a place like New York. Also the flex is that every line delivered by the actors employed rhyme, to the point where the entire 12-minute piece could be interpreted as an extended poem. It was a one-time experience but I’m cooking up another iteration of the work, so that’s pretty exciting. And overall, these dips I’ve taken into other formats just remind me of showmanship and conveyance as tools for relating to your audience. I think the enunciation and delivery of someone who’s technically trained in acting opens a whole world of possibilities for a rap performance, the way we consider battle rappers and their expression being like jagged monologues. Or with poetry, remembering that urgency and truth are quintessential tools to jar the audience and subvert expectations. So many ways to piece together a creative philosophy by amalgamating all these techniques and modalities.

7. How much editing do you do after initially writing a verse/song? Do you labor over verses, working on them over a long period of time, or do you start and finish a piece in a quick burst?

This goes back to content and topical efficacy for me. I’ve always written pretty fast as far as getting an idea down and thinking about angles. But when the piece is either emotionally intensive for me, or coming from a place that requires research, I could be working and re-working the same ideas for months. I tend NOT to do that now, as I’ve gotten to a comfortable place mechanically, where if I can think of a rhyme scheme and the thesis of the piece, I’ll play it like a madlib. Write a line relevant to the topic, mumble through the cadence I wanna hit, think of interesting phrases I’ve never heard in a song before, jot those down, and keep repeating the cycle until the whole thing comes together. I take pride in not being one of those, “YO I WROTE THIS IN 4 MINUTES ON A BOX OF FRUITY PEBBLES!” guys, 'cause sometimes that does happen, but I also believe the word and its power supersedes the rate at which the word is produced. Infusing intention into the realest shit, to make it hit harder for who needs it. (Also no disrespect to Raekwon - haha, I just feel like every rapper right now tries to jack that inhuman writing time as a stamp on their report card. Which, when it actually took you four minutes to write…it probably shows.)

8. Do you write to a beat, or do you adjust and tweak lyrics to fit a beat?

Both! One thing I love considering is how I can butcher prepositional phrases to make a bar I really like fit in time, while still getting across the meaning. Which actually opens up a whole other avenue for wordplay and entendre. I think Valee is one cat that does that really well, saying these seemingly disparate, borderline abstract things, then connecting them through extremely legible situations that continue the “story” of the song.

9. What dictates the direction of your lyrics? Are you led by an idea or topic you have in mind beforehand? Is it stream-of-consciousness? Is what you come up with determined by the constraint of the rhymes?

Again, all of it. I do squarely start from a topic most often, followed by fleshing out the structure with stream-of-consciousness and real time editing.

The rhyme constraint thing is funny, cause how many great emcees can we think of who do the same three rhyme schemes their whole career? Or alternatively, how many do we know for consistently changing their style up in iterations? The constraint really becomes a style thing after you’ve been making music for a while. You know what sounds good coming from your voice, what might not land based on your speech patterns, which ways to bend pronunciation, all that. So I think of that as a byproduct of saying what you gotta say, less as a limitation to abide by when creating.

10. Do you like to experiment with different forms and rhyme schemes, or do you keep your bars free and flexible?

Always experimenting. I never wanna write the same thing twice (from an intent perspective), so thinking of unique ways of pointing to worldly truths is a great exercise for staying sharp. Free and flexible bars can (and do) appear in my discography, but the goal is to keep everyone on their toes, including me.

11. What’s a verse you’re particularly proud of, one where you met the vision for what you desire to do with your lyrics?

So this one is a deep cut, but the verse on "garden." from Hohenheim’s Burden Pt. 3. The topic was actually the last line of the verse, “There’s no discernible principle, you pick and you choose.” But the way I approached it, and why I’m proud of it, is cause of a few moments where that idea of picking and choosing, in life, becomes the soil for one’s proverbial garden. Two sections come to mind that make me happy. The first is: “Flight or fight response unconsidered, the cicadas scream while the cadence quiver, / Qualified not by the impatiens hanging off the window sill but by the impatience incubated through the growth in self.” It’s just embodying the naturally dualistic but coexisting sensory experiences of the garden. A quiet, wavering voice somewhere in the distance slipping through the hiss of the cicadas (noise of the outside world). The impatiens as indicative of growth versus the impatience as indicative of how frustrating it can be watching yourself grow. The fight or flight being our usual binary for handling conflict, and affirming that in the garden no one is thinking of that, because nothing will grow through either of those modes alone. The second section I love is: “Toes exposed to the oscillations of LFOs, / Dropback turns higher than the sun go and gunsmoke reach, / You can’t kill me if I’m infinite, that’s what the drumroll teach.” That one hits crazy cause, for all my anime fans out there, I’m referring to Eureka 7 a few times (Dropback turns; Higher Than The Sun; LFOs, in the show meaning Light Finding Operation). But situating it in this context of the garden, when you watch the show and see the motifs of what building a home in a violent world means, or learning to nurture yourself and others, the references take on a whole other meaning. Also, “You can’t kill me if I’m infinite, that’s what the drumroll teach” is just hard.

12. Can you pick a favorite bar of yours and describe the genesis of it?

One that always goes under the radar but I think is mad fun is off of "menacing." on Hohenheim’s Burden Pt. 7: “Like two boroughs claim to the genesis, / Same Queen’s broken English, the bridge was over heads like bats in the belfry.”

It’s an extended acknowledgment of the BDP vs Juice Crew beef around the origins of hip-hop culture regionally, but also referring to the Queen’s broken English as what many Afro-Caribbean kids heard about the way they speak in school/formal spaces. Unified in this art that was still being actively derided for anti-intellectualism. So that reflects the outward perception, which often overshadows the nuance and politics of the communities actually involved in the thing, hence, “the bridge was over heads like bats in the belfry.” The means by which people travel and connect to us have tended to be from this top-down view, very removed and out of the light of what’s really happening with this art.

It goes by pretty quick but it’s so loaded as a bar, I always like breaking that one down to people.

13. Do you feel strongly one way or another about punch-ins? Will you whittle a bar down in order to account for breath control, or are you comfortable punching-in so you don’t have to sacrifice any words?

I actually hate punch-ins 'cause I can’t punch-in during a live set, and my view is if I can’t do it live with my singular voice, it shouldn’t be like that on record either. But I recently recorded an album’s worth of material doing EXCLUSIVELY punch-ins, for every bar on every song. I wanted to break away from that stigma I set around it, and it’s actually really fun to play with creatively. However, that album is never coming out and I’m still doing every verse straight through. But it was a fun experiment!

14. What non-hiphop material do you turn to for inspiration? What non-music has influenced your work recently?

So many things. Anime, video games, books, other music genres, conversations with friends, literally any and all stimuli are viable for inspiration in my creative universe. I probably look like a crazy person, for real. I’m like reading Jung’s writings on Archetypal psychology and watching two-hour breakdowns of the meta-narrative of Metal Gear Solid 2. Musically I just went back to The Mars Volta after having not listened to them for years, so that’s been fun and informing some textural things I’d like to try my hand at in the future. Also on a huge Metalheadz revisit too. I wanna do a song with Cleveland Watkiss, bro - that would be so fire. And just for vibes, been bumping a lot of Kaidi Tatham, Kerri Chandler, KUMO 99, mad other stuff. I’m literally open to anything if it’s grounded in a defined creative philosophy.

15. Writers are often saddled with self-doubt. Do you struggle to like your own shit, or does it all sound dope to you?

I don’t struggle really 'cause I’m acutely aware that nothing is gonna be as exciting as that new thing sitting on your computer that three people have heard. So when my work goes out into the world, I rest knowing I did my best and the next thing will be even better. And the emotional connection to the work brings out an appreciation that few would ever really understand outside of like, my closest friends and loved ones and me, so that’s a dimension where I don’t even care to critique the work, cause I know exactly where in my heart it came from, and when, and why.

16. Who’s a rapper you listen to with such a distinguishable style that you need to resist the urge to imitate them?

That’s actually a hard-ass question; I think there’s an aspect of time spent with an artist that contributes to my internalizing of their techniques. So like, I spent a lot of time analyzing DOOM’s style (long live the GOAT), and I overtly attempted things I heard on his records. Then as I acclimated more to his style, I veered away from emulating it because I learned the mechanics behind what he was doing. Instead of making 1:1 recreations of his schemes, I employed the tools behind them in my own way. So with expectation, and subverting the end rhyme, I picked that up from "Great Day" off Madvillainy: “Last wish, I wish I had two more wishes, / And I wish they fixed the door to the Matrix, it’s mad glitches / Spit so many verses sometime my jaw twitches / One thing this party could use is more [beat - clears throat] booze.” Such an expert move in creating a moment that, either when recited to oneself, with friends, or performed in front of a crowd, there’s this inside joke and “Aha! Gotcha!” that’s always palpable. I live for that shit, where the audience can be in on the process of the writing almost, if not in, real time. So I guess my answer is DOOM, because I spent so much time trying to figure it out, that once I did, I made myself use the toolkit and not the products.

17. Do you have an agenda as an artist? Are there overarching concerns you want to communicate to the listener?

My agenda is: do right by your people and connect worlds. That’s what the whole cognitive conduit thing is about, for real. We all occupy space and experiences that could theoretically never overlap if we didn’t actively seek and nurture the connection we have to other people and places. So when your cognition of the external becomes a conduit point, for energy to travel through and relay information/feelings/experiences to another person, or people, you persist in forming those bridges to greater understanding of the external and your own place in it. As someone who has dealt with a lot of grief, and loss, and isolation, I resolved to make more meaningful connections in my life. And over the years, in embodying that, I’ve seen myself grow a lot, and seen other people be affected by my growth in positive ways. That cascade of experience into the lives of those you hold space with is beautiful, and scary, and global. So I put that bridge-building ethos at the forefront of my work because I’ve seen what community oriented work does for everyone. And it’s incredible. Other than that, it’s free the Global South (not underdeveloped, under-respected) and fuck 12 🏁.

RAPS + CRAFTS is a series of questions posed to rappers about their craft and process. It is designed to give respect and credit to their engagement with the art of songwriting. The format is inspired, in part, by Rob McLennan’s 12 or 20 interview series.

Photo credit: Nakama.

[cathalbravecog]

Man... I can't stop thinking about the things that were talked about on the stream, especially the answer on my question - so... get ready for a ramble! its a long one. oops. i dont even know where im going with this, im just dumping my thoughts somewhere. half is about ttcc lore in general and the streams, the other half is about cathal and me projecting onto him deeper.

before i even hop deeper into this, it wasn't until early today that i learned that there was a whole drama about cranky's answers (regarding the graham and flint question and the whole "keep it sane" thing. i thought it was...off, but i understood it as 'do what you want people, just don't start any harassment because of ships and your favorite pairs'.

definitely could have been phrased better, though. at least we got a good response and an apology later from maven on twitter. but i legit did not know this was a drama until those twitter posts were made LOL. i dont interact with the fandom so i do not know how that answer was percieved by most. or if anyone except for me and my friends have had any thoughts about the question i asked that got answered.)

and what im tryna get to is that i get cranky isnt the one to be answering lore things, and probably didnt know what to answer... but it's still something to think about

because being told "cogs and toons just dont become how they are out of the blue" (paraphrasing here) as an answer to what cathal initially thought of seeing his dad be bet up and thrown off a tower is... confusing? he did say first and foremost that it has to be built upon before saying that. i understand that this is... a lot of characters! and cathal did have some focus on him thanks to the comic and they wanted to focus on other managers... but some have deeper, more intricate lore that's easy to grasp (especially the more, well, angstier managers like chip and misty.)

and we have gotten some extra lore for other managers like belle, mary, tawny.... thanks to thomas' rambles.

and it's definitely difficult for a team of volounteers working hard on a fan game together to make lore for all the characters, that are still very young in their *life span*, having been around for less than a year. despite ttcc being more character driven and focused on the cogs, it's still a game they have to run so they cannot focus on lore only and some game management has to be done first. there's a bunch of things they have to consider, like consistency and how fans may react, or possible themes or what they want the story to be...

and. yeah. its hard since. come on lets admit it. clash has an issue with how these are all given to us. hell, there's lore bits i still dont know about and im still learning because it's..so all over the place. a new player will not know about it. maven acknowledged this in the tweet and i really appreciate that, as it's honestly been my number one issue with clash, especially as someone who is there for the lore. (i mean, and the gameplay, i know some people who don't play the game itself much. well i sure do a little TOO MUCH because i have PROBLEMS. but im interested in the lore, too, yknow?)

some lore you cant learn from the wiki, and unless you interact with the community, you may never learn *where* all of this even is. if you werent live for certain lore there, it's hardly accessible to you. lore locked behind one time events, an arg website, wikis, discord chats... all that. it's hard to keep track of! i'm sure it's like that for both the fans and the writers. these characters are great, fun, and i love them, but the way we are given this information is... not the best. it's very easy to miss certain details.

it's especially bad if you're like me - only ever interacting with a close group of people you trust, (because people are scary especially a lot of... lore driven fans. yeahnoimeanshippers.sorry.and just big crowds of people in general) having only gotten back into the game recently AFTER most of the major lore events (first played once in 2019, then never again until january 2023) and also you dislike youtube and video content, so you dont watch it. something in your brain would rather if you step on a nail than watch a playthrough video (especially with commentary).

like in general it shouldnt be necessary to go through all these hoops just to know the lore! especially for things that may have little lore...

anyways, uh, back to cathal. i cannot stop thinking about this.

it definitely wasnt an answer to what i specifically asked - but possibly more so about... why cathal is the way he is? and despite what my brain and low self esteem during hard times may tell me - i do not believe that anybody is truly "lazy". i just dont think that exists. there's always some reason behind a person being unmotivated or lazy. even the little things!

but like... that's just kinda obvious. all toons and cogs have motivations. thats like... one of the basics of writing characters. have motivations for characters and reasons for why they are how they are. doesnt have to be anything tragic, just.... how they are as people.

it's totally unrelated to the question of what cathal thought about seeing his dad like that... but oh well! i asked that because i made up my own story around that already, and i just wanted to see what someone working on the game thinks about the same idea.

not to be Tumblr User CathalBravecog, but, of course I have projected heavily onto cathal. i have already stated how important cathal is to me as a character, especially with appreciating myself when im.. not exactly the most motivated. when im not doing much. taught me to appreciate breaks. hell! i keep preaching this myself. its okay to take breaks! and yet i often end up not doing it and i overwork myself on games and art and other things.

there's... a lot of things "wrong" with me that i don't have names for yet, especially due to not having a diagnosis for them, but they're very real feelings and they cause me to be unable to do things a lot of the time. various mental blocks and a new member of the gang... physical pai! hooray.

this... endless productivity we are forced and expected to do. it can take a toll on you. breaks are just as necessary and to say it's a thing that has to be re-learned is... sickening. hooray for living in a Corporate (clash) society, fellas.

one thing i can say is that i absolutely headcanon that cathal has adhd - though, maybe not the same type i do. i do not think he gets randomly hyper and wants to (and does) jump around everywhere and blurt things out randomly and impulsively. cathal here has the low energy, yknow.

i like that a lot of the content around him doesnt even describe him with the words "lazy" and "sleepy" instead.

every day is the same... even if his job is relatively simple, just watching over the camera feed - it's definitely boring... and having to do it every day is not rewarding. and being mostly alone and without consequence, he gives into wanting to do something else. he's got these huge screens and a room to himself, and he loves watching shows and cartoons... so he's gonna do that. it's more fun. it's stimulating. and especially with his dad being the one to give him his position, he knows that he's got nothing to really worry about there.

i also think it's a bit hard to be motivated knowing that... this war between the cogs and toons is just. endless. hell, again, he has to see his dad *everyday* be attacked by them. his body damaged after the fall - only to be fixed again. rinse and repeat. i would too, find it pointless. especially if you're like cathal, since i pointed out before that he is very kind and caring towards the other cogs. he's also thoughtful, noting that yknow... a lot of stairs to get to his room.

why do all that when you can chill... and feel good. do something that feels nice...

i don't have any names for this, but with how sleepy he usually is, that's definitely a thing to consider too. and just, from experience... being tired and/or sleepy it... dismotivates you even more. its so hard to start tasks even if you *want* to do them. and considering cathal mooost likely doesn't want to do his work on his own - then these tasks can be just. impossible to start.

like, i have struggled with this my entire life myself, just because of my adhd screwing with everything, but after getting covid and most definitely getting a form of chronic exhaustion from it.. things have been even harder. i pull myself through day and i barely have the energy to even start anything. sometimes i dont even do anything all day and... woops! still no mood or energy to do anything. i just work on random bursts of motivation and things that captivate me...

not sure how it relates to cathal, but, hey, if im personal here ill ramble about it too because WOW it has been biting me in the ass and i need to speak to Professionals About It

like... i dont think hes being "lazy" willingly, yknow? theres a reason behind it. it definitely is just... being sleepy, the comfort... the fun and stimulation doing something fun he's interested in (his shows) are just... stronger desires and way easier for him to get to. why struggle through something when it takes up all your energy, and then you feel no reward for it? yeah. exactly. even just "not feeling like it" is a reson. "not having energy" is a reason. hey, are these things to get better about if needed? certainly. i wish i could get help with this, it would help me in my life so so much. but should it be seen as ENTIRELY negative and as being a "hinder to society". hell nah. and i think thats swag. cathal is swag he can do this, good for him lmaooo. my brain is deteriorating i apologize.

there was... another thing i wanted to say, but i forgot. so i'll move on.

but just... yeah. i dont think cathal is just lazy. i dont believe in "laziness". he's got reasons for why he prefers naps and just... watching tv instead of doing his work. perhaps he does want to do these things, but gave up on trying. its not worth the effort, it does not feel good. its not stimulating enough to keep him going.

[nerbs-the-word]

NERB'S WORLDBUILDING - Scavengers

So I'm not going to get into the details of this, but my worldbuilding project does technically have G/t in it (Despite the fact I'm working on it for a TTRPG, the players will NEVER KNOW) So basically, Scavengers are genetically modified humans, inspired by my beloved All Tomorrows, and I suppose I'll share more under the cut for those interested. It is a lore dump, though, so I don't mind if you want to keep waiting for some actual writing.

So in recent history, the First Galactic Republic (Humanity) waged a war against The Others, a stereotypical genocidal alien species intent on wiping out all sentient life across the galaxy. To cut a long story short, they won through the use of nanomachine viruses. Anyway, eventually (A few decades after the war's end) humanity discovered a carbon-based life signature as well as minor signs of civilization on a world once inhabited by the Others. This is weird, because the Others were silicon based. So here is my world's take on Borrowers; Scavengers. The Others used captured humans and biologically engineered them to be spies, engineers, what have you. They just made them smaller (Bypassing ideas of the square cube law using bionic implants and other sciencey stuff) so their little hands could get ahold of sensitive documents, or get into nooks and crannies of complicated machinery. Stuff that the Others couldn't (Or didn't want to do), basically making the Scavengers a slave race. However, they were still in the prototyping stage, genetically unstable and not ready for service, when the virus wiped out the silicon-based Others, while leaving the carbon-based Scavengers. This basically left a society of Scavengers without culture, ideals, technology, ect. in a world far too large for themselves, especially since they didn't have the knowledge (or even really the biology) to interact with much of the Others' equipment and technology. They had language and many psychology similar to humanity, so they became an almost tribal culture, treating the Others as gods, and the virus as an unseen force that struck them down for their abuse of the Scavengers. They made tools, had variations to their religion, languages and dialects, and even seemed to be in the process of rediscovering agriculture and animal husbandry. At least before being rescued (Or colonized, based on individual perspective) by 'baseline' humanity. They were genetically similar enough to humans to be added to the Earthen biosphere, under the classification homo sapiens micro, and became a minor race across Human space. The 'common' name of "Scavengers" was adopted from the first research notes on the species, which compared them to human scavengers who pick through old wrecks for resources; like the Scavengers race does.

Now, Scavengers have a sort of 'culture shock', being dropped into a galaxy many tens of thousands of years more advanced than what they had, going from taking months to cross their entire world on foot (Which was an island roughly the size of Michigan), to zooming across the stars in a matter of days.

I have yet to make any Scavenger characters in the world, but I do have an idea for a story involving one that I may introduce soon. We'll see. I also have yet to make concrete designs for them, but I think they'll look mostly humanoid, with slightly different hand/face/leg structure, and having far less hair than humanity does (Most specimens being bald or having just peach-like fuzz on their bodies). I may also give them tails, we'll see what the final design looks like when I get around to making one. Questions welcome!