#I can’t think of a good example right now that wasn’t actually shit media

[blahaj-blastin]

Big fan of that one weirdly specific trope that’s like:

All our parents have a secret past where they were involved with some cult/organization/crime and we, the teen protagonists, are now collectively wrapped up in the actions/mysteries we had no idea our families were hiding.

[hellishjoel]

talk me down

3.7k / therapist!joel x f!reader

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Summary: You’re finally ready to sit down and discuss your obvious daddy issues. Your therapist, Joel, has his methods. 

Warnings/Information/Heads-Up: MA 18+ (minors DNI), NO OUTBREAK, abuse of position (therapist!joel), discussions of parental divorce, daddy issues, praise kink, daddy kink, pet names, cursing/swearing, age gap, handjob (for a lil bit?) unprotected p in v, cockwarming (if you squint?), breathplay (I’m running out of breath typing all this are we good to go?) 

A/N: this is my first fic wow how exciting, I can’t thank my new friends enough for the brainstorming and helping make it to tumblr so let’s just get on with it yeah? tell me if you want more, my requests are open x

“Oooh, fuck,�� you gasp, your head coming back up to watch as his hand disappeared under the drape of your skirt. Suddenly you felt him cup your aching mound, taking in a short breath at the feeling of finally getting some much-desired pressure down there.   “So fuckin’ wet… were you this wet during our whole session, kitten?” He asked. It was sick and twisted, you knew it was. That’s why you let out a shameful little nod, your legs wanting to clench around his hand there.  He let out a disgusted scoff, you deserved it. You wanted to fuck your therapist. 

“So what brings you here today?”

Your eyes shyly evade his, instead choosing to graze over the belongings of your new therapist’s office. It looked like a small library the way books were lined up and stacked on the shelves. The desk behind him was a dark oak, and everything had its place, not a pen out of line. After you deliberately ignore his question, he probes you again.

“It says on your intake form that you have... A distant relationship with your father due to your parents' divorce. Is that something you want to talk about with me today?”

His voice is sweet like honey, but you’re the only one dripping. You failed during your extended research on therapists to check his picture because you had no idea you signed up for someone so fucking handsome.

Your jaw was tight as you clamped your legs tighter together one draped over the other, trying to conceal your growing arousal. Talk, or he’ll think you’re mute!

“Yes.” You say, clearing your throat as you readjust your skirt over your lap, tugging at the hem.

You confide in Joel about the hardships of your parents growing up. The house was never quiet, always fighting, tearing each other down, and it just wasn’t healthy. You thought you’d thank the lord the day they filed for a divorce. You didn’t expect to lose the relationship you had with your father in the midst of it all.

You were still young, trying to grow up and learn, his absence mattered to you, even if it didn’t to your mother. He came around a lot at first. He’d pick you up from school and steal you away for a few hours, getting ice cream to celebrate your reunion with him.

But then, he got a new girlfriend. You weren’t sure how she managed to replace both you and your mother, but she did. You saw him less, he started not meeting your expectations. Soon, he became a weird distant memory. Now, as a young adult, you combat all the unjust things the wake of his departure caused. You couldn’t bear the thought of dating someone your age. Everyone was young and immature, asking for nudes over text after the first date if they even got your phone number at all. Now it was all just over social media or dating apps.

“Older men are just more... Refined. They have their priorities and goals, and they’re like... Actually accomplishing shit. Guys my age are just..” You paused, your eyes meeting his own to fill in the gaps.

“.. Not meeting your expectations?” Joel asked, his pen clutched in his hand as he scribbled something in his notepad.

“Right.” You let out breathily, your eyes falling to the chest hair you could see exposed by his button-up shirt.

This was a perfect example because look at Dr. Joel Miller! His Ph.D. decorated the wall with numerous other accolades on his shelves, so you knew he was smart. Being a therapist made him a good listener, you’d never have to feel like you were the therapist to a frat guy again.

You let out an involuntary whimper, a white-hot flash soaring through the pit of your stomach. You were dripping for him, and you could feel it against your clenched thighs.

“I know talking about these topics is difficult, but you’re doing a good job.” He praised you as you felt your chest and cheeks flush red with his attention.

Your breathing was staggered, you needed to release the tension between your legs desperately.

“You-- uhm, you think I’m doing a good job?”

His eyes flashed up to you with the question, something dark and tantalizing about the way he looked over you now. It was like a predator meeting prey the way his eyes began to rake over you.

Your arousal was obvious in the way your knee anxiously bounced up and down, continuing to readjust in your seat, begging for him to tell you that your time with him was up so you could go home and use your vibrator on your clit, thinking about Dr. Joel Miller between your legs.

You watched as he stood up from his chair across from you, your eyes tracking him as he nodded slowly. He clasped his hands behind his back, his strong biceps fighting the material of his shirt for dominance. The hand closest to you came down and did a delicate sweep around the rim of the chair you were sitting in.

“You’re doing great, baby girl.” He praised again, stopping to stand next to you. You were eye-level to his waist, your lips parting at the sight of the bulge in his pants. Oh, fuck me, so that’s what he’s been hiding behind his notepad.

His hand gently reached out to you, two straight fingers under your chin as he tilted you up to look at him. Your long eyelashes batted at him, teeth piercing down into your bottom lip. You let out an involuntary sigh as his hand moved up your cheek, bringing you in to rest against his thigh.

He was warm, and he smelled like Old Spice, god, you could swear it was the same one your dad used to use. You whimper at the thought, digging your face gently further into his protection. You felt his hand gently caress the back of your head, stroking back your hair from your face.

You wanted him, your pussy wanted him, and the throbbing need for his attention and affection was incurable. You began to press kisses into the material of his pants, losing all pride as you fell to your knees in front of him and palmed your hand over his growing erection.

You braved looking up at him, his face watching you in adoration, like he was proud of you.

“Is this what you want? I’ll do whatever you want.” You say meekly, desperate to please.

“You know what I think you need?” He asks, his voice dropped an octave, and it was making you purr. He was more sultry now, his hands finding yours and guiding you up off of the floor. You finally shake your head, your hands gently moving up his chest and feeling his toned pecs and broad shoulders.

Seeing him this close made your heart flutter. He was so handsome, so grown. His wispy curls were adorning the same salt and pepper as his beard. He had worn lines by his eyes and on his forehead, his curious mind must always be causing his brows to furrow. He had you breathless at the mouth and achingly wet down below.

“I think you need me to take care of you. Is that what you want, baby? Someone to show you how much they care about you? Someone to be where you need them most?” His strong hand is traveling down your front now, Joel’s pointer finger curling into the front of your skirt. Your lips part as he tugs so hard that you’re falling into him, your small hands clutching the landscape of his biceps.

“Yes-- fuck, please Joel, yes.” You nearly beg. Be there for me, be inside me.

He let out a heavy grunt of satisfaction, closing the distance between you as he cradled your face in his big hands and connected your lips. You felt safe, letting your walls fall down as he took care of you.

You melted in his hold, Joel’s tongue carefully gliding over your bottom one in a request for you to part yours for him. You followed his lead, a whimpering moan leaving you as you felt his tongue invade your mouth. He was moving you backward methodically until the back of your thighs hit the desk you previously admired. Your hips shook the frame, hearing pens and some papers clatter to the floor.

You felt overwhelmingly hot, you needed to shed some layers. Like the mind reader he was, Joel’s hands moved down to the hem of your top, breaking your heated kiss to discard the material in his way.

He generously cupped your breasts held away by your bra, another desperate moan leaving you as you watched him through hooded eyes admire your body. His hands were quick to settle on your hips, fingertips burning into your skin as he lifted you up onto the desk with ease. Fuck, he had the kind of strength that looked effortless.

Joel was taking charge, and it was so nice, he knew exactly what he wanted to do, and you didn’t have to worry about anything. His legs nudged your own open, cool air finally greeting your needy pussy. The sensation had your head falling back, accidentally breaking your kiss once more.

“Oooh, fuck,” you gasp, your head coming back up to watch as his hand disappeared under the drape of your skirt. Suddenly you felt him cup your aching mound, taking in a short breath at the feeling of finally getting some much-desired pressure down there.

“So fuckin’ wet… were you this wet during our whole session, kitten?” He asked. It was sick and twisted, you knew it was. That’s why you let out a shameful little nod, your legs wanting to clench around his hand there.

He let out a disgusted scoff, you deserved it. You wanted to fuck your therapist.

“You want daddy to take care of that for you with his cock?” His foul words had you at a loss of your own, your jaw slack as he pressed his hips into yours and you could feel his dick pressed right up against your pussy.

“Take daddy’s belt off.” He grumbled his orders, a quick nod leaving you. You didn’t want to waste his time.

“Yes.” You whimpered.

“Yes, what?” His voice was stern and articulate, making you bend your will as his close proximity flooded your senses. You couldn’t find his belt soon enough. You popped the button of his jeans and nearly tore off the zipper at his ask.

“Yes, daddy.” You whimper, a greedy smile on your lips to see you earned his favor. He adoringly cupped one side of your cheek as both of your heads rested against one another’s to watch you pull down his dark briefs.

He let out a strained grunt at the release, his flesh going to slap against his tanned stomach. He was already unbuttoning his shirt as you made a fist around him, watching his face to see how he liked it. Too fast? A little slower? Too rough... You paused and spat down on him, your eyes darting back up to his as he let out a satisfied sigh. Let me do it perfectly for you, Joel.

“So good for me.” He purred, his thumb brushing down the slope of your nose and over your swollen bottom lip that you had bruised from biting down so hard on it. He pushed the tip of his thumb past your lips, the intrusion a surprise but you eagerly sucked to appease him. The action made him swell in your hand to fullness, even beginning to feel too heavy in your hand as you continued to work over him.

“Is this all for me?” You asked eagerly, a sweet smile gracing your face.

You watched as he leaned in, your eyelashes fluttering closed as he came to press his warm lips against the crown of your head. “All for you, baby girl.” He mumbled against your forehead.

“Oh,” you let out in a sweet surprised little moan, your hand working over him eagerly faster. You didn’t care if you got off at this point, as long as he did.

“Lie back, baby.” His voice was rocky like gravel, you could already see his chest heaving at the attention of your hands. You did as he asked, but not before he unclipped your bra so your tits were on full show for him.

You reached one of your hands back, already gripping the edge of the table as you braced yourself for him. He was so large, easily the largest you had ever been with. You wanted to feel every inch of man that he was inside of your throbbing cunt.

Your skirt was merely an obstacle in his way, watching him toss it up to show your lacey panties underneath. You bit down on your lip with a wide smirk on your face, he really liked the lace.

“So fuckin pretty,” he admired, your hands coming to rest over his own, your nails gently grazing down his forearms to his fingers. His pointer finger and thumb grazed over the soaked material, admiring how he could see your pretty pussy underneath it. The lace was so dainty and fragile in his hands, he could just--

You gasp as his large hands rip the delicate lace right open, a messy opening of broken threads but now, he had unlimited access to your sex. He was so strong, you hoped he would split you open the same way.

His hands took a grip on the tops of your parted thighs from the outside, taking one foul yank as you felt him press his cock between your wet folds. You were back to gripping and stroking over his forearms, your delicate hand coming up to feel his stubbled cheek.

“Joel please, I need you.” you whimpered out, his head nodding against yours as a few of the curlier strands on his head fell onto his forehead. He was so handsome when he was turned on.

Joel’s heavy huffs broke the eye contact of his cock gliding up and down your arousal, the slick lubing him perfectly. He was perfectly glazed over now, all because of you, his heavy thumb coming down to gently circle over your throbbing clit.

You let out a cry at the much-needed attention, your walls pulsing for him to fill you up.

“Joel!” You whined out in anticipation, your jaw dropping as he finally guided his tip to you without warning and slammed into your depths until he bottomed out in one thrust. His hand was quick to clamp over your mouth, stopping you from letting out a sobbing moan as tears started to swell at the brim of your eyes.

“Don’t want anyone to hear us, princess,” His voice was broken by grunts and loose breaths, his palm swallowing your hot high pitched whines. “Or else we’ll have to stop.” You did not want him to stop!

You quickly shook your head and clasped your wrist around his which kept your mouth shut. I’ll be good, I’ll be good for you Joel. A tear slipped as you peppered apologetic kisses to the inside of his palm, your eyes desperately connecting with his in a silent ask for him to please continue fucking you.

Joel swiveled his hips back, his jeans clinging to his upper thighs as he rolled back into you. You couldn’t help but clench your eyes closed and let out a broken moan. He filled you up in all the best ways possible, he was perfect inside of you, every goddamn inch. You didn’t realize how loud you had gotten, his hand pushing your head down further into the desk and squeezing into your cheeks until you snapped out of it.

“What did fuckin’ tell you?” He punched out. God, you could feel him pulsating inside of your tight walls.

“God, this tight pussy feels so-- fuckin’ good.”

You moaned quietly at the compliment, a blissed-out smile on your lips still against his palm as he started a steady rhythm rocking into you.

You whimpered as the desk started to creak with each of his heavy thrusts, pinching your ass against the desk but he felt too good to complain. Sure, you’d have a red line imprinted on your cheeks, but hell, it was so worth it. “Such a good fuckin’ girl, little angel for me-- fuck,” he grunted as he used the hand wrapped around your mouth as leverage, holding your head down as his hips snapped into you mercilessly. You were crying out moans into his palm, but nothing loud ever left the room, just like he wanted.

Your hands are clenching at the desk now, desperate not to fly off. Through blurry eyes, you saw his face, tight and twisted as he admired the way your breasts bounced with each of his thrusts.

You bravely reached up to take his hand around your mouth, shifting it down to wrap around your windpipe. You gave him an angelic little smile, biting down on your lower lip to hold in your dirty moans.

Joel watched you in awe, nodding with his sick little half-smirk as he started to squeeze at the sides of your throat. Fuck, he’s done this before, he knows exactly what he’s doing. The heightened experience turns you on, he’s not some 20-something idiot who cares only about getting his dick wet. Joel wants you to cum.

“You look at me baby.. fuck--, don’t break eye contact until you wanna breathe, darlin’.” His accent drawled in your ear and made your pussy even wetter for him. One of his hands squeezed at the sides of your delicate windpipe, his other hand snaking between you two as his electric fingers found your buzzing clit.

The attention was a lot, but you were a whore for it.

His thrusts grew sloppier, but he was pacing himself, Joel wants you to cum first.

You whimper at the idea of him putting you ahead of his own interested and needs, your head growing foggy as your wrist wrapped around his own that held you down but you didn’t look away from his amber eyes. He licked his lips in desire watching you, your lips parting for air as you finally looked away.

He followed through on his promise, his strong hands going lax as your head fell to the side, eyes closing in bliss while your pussy fluttered around his dick.

“Fuck baby girl,” he panted through a mumble as his spare hand massaged over your breasts. “Got me losin’ my goddamn mind.” He moaned something that resembled your name, pinching at your sensitive peaks until he had you whimpering.

“Joel I- oh god,” your stomach dropped as the tip of his dick massaged at your sweet spot, a cry threatening to spill from your lips but you knew he didn’t like you being too loud in his office so you hold it in, your cheeks going hot red.

It was all too much. Your foggy head, his hands on your sensitive bits, his fucking dick slamming into you. You felt so small in his hold, his body shielding you from the outside world as he drove you face-first into your earth-shattering orgasm.

“Joel-Joel please, fuck, I’m gonna-,” Your chin tilted up and your back arched, his hand instantly moving back up to your throat so you could feel even more floated during the crash of your orgasm.

“Cum for me princess. Cum for me now.” He demanded in a mumble.

It coursed through your body like an electric current, your body short-circuiting from the amount of pleasure it was receiving all at once.

Your lips were parted, but nothing came out. You couldn’t hear a thing, only Joel, only him as he ruts himself against your core and you feel him spill his hot cum into the depths of your sex. You lazily smirked as you made your walls flutter around him, your core pulsing. Could almost feel him in your belly.

His breaths were heavy, heavenly. It made your skin clammy, the both of you so fucked up that you were stuck in place. You didn’t realize it, but you had reached up to cup his face, your thumb gently gliding down the curve of his crooked nose. Your lips gently came together as your head came up, kissing the tip of his nose before going to lay back down on his desk.

“Oh, baby girl,” Joel purred in adoration, his mouth coming down to greet yours in a delicate kiss. “Did such a good job.” Both of you were so drunk on your orgasms, everything was so perfect.

You lazily kissed him back, your arms wrapping around the tops of his shoulders with your fingers lightly fisting the hair at the nape of his neck to keep him close as he softened inside of you. You could stay here like this forever.

You glanced over just in time, seeing the last grain of sand fall down in his glass sand timer. Your session with Dr. Joel Miller was over.

He helped you hop off his desk, your wobbly legs needing to find their strength again. His cum was already meeting the tops of your inner thighs, your face blushing at the feeling. You were quite literally gaping for him.

Joel cleared his throat and easily pulled his jeans back up to the top of his hips at his waist, securing his belt and zipper before he fisted your discarded, ripped apart panties.

“Oh,” you whispered a bit embarrassed at the sight of them. You had just finished pulling your shirt back onto your torso, stuffing your bra inside your purse. No way you were going to try and put that thing back on. You reached out for him to hand them over, your eyes widening as he pulled his hand away and stuffed them into his pocket.

“For safe keeping…” He trailed off, his eyes still dark as they looked down at your wide ones. Well, you weren’t getting those back any time soon. They were his now, your torn to threads black lace panties. You nodded and weakly smiled, still trying to catch your breath.

Joel walked you out, tapping his absentminded secretary’s desk to tell her to find something in both of your calendars for a future date.

“I think I can really help you work this out.” He told you on your way out.

As you left his office, you felt like everyone knew what you had just done. But for now, it was just a secret for you and your therapist, Joel.

---------------- taglist: let's be fr lol If you liked talk me down, check out pretty little thing!

[cherrybomb107]

Not to sound like a conspiracy theorist (though that term was literally coined by the powers that be to discredit people who got too close to the truth, but I digress), but does anyone else think that we’re being primed to believe that fighting back is morally wrong? Think about it. In kids’ shows, it’s a running joke how the MC will slaughter the bad guy’s henchmen like it’s nothing, but when it’s time to face the big bad, all of a sudden they can’t kill them got whatever reason. “I can’t kill you, cause that’ll make me just as bad as you.” “I’m better than that.” “That’s not the way.” Or something to that effect.

And it’s just like, no??? Wtf are you talking about? Why is the evil intergalactic overlord who flooded our village, burned down his village, killed her whole entire family, and kicks puppies every Thursday still alive? Why, when he has told and shown us, time and time and time again that he has no desire to change his ways? Why would you ever think, let alone say, let alone actually BELIEVE that killing that mfer puts you on the same level as him? What the actual fuck are we even talking about rn? If you don’t put that mfer in the ground EXPEDITIOUSLY I SWEAR I-

Nah, but really tho, what kind of message are we teaching our youth? “Violence is bad, full stop, and even though I can’t/won’t do anything to help you, I want you to know you’re just as bad as the villain for hitting them back?” Huh??? And it’s not just that this message is peddled in media. Let’s say if you’re getting bullied and you get fed up. You already told your parents, your teachers, your school counselors, and the principal, but nothing’s changed. That mfer and their bum ass friends have bullied you for 99 days in a row. The ONE DAY you decide to fight back(whether that’s with words, fists, feet, etc) both of you are getting suspended. Why? Because the school has a “zero tolerance policy”. But wait, that can’t be right. You being bullied for God knows how long wasn’t just tolerated; it was practically cosigned by the school! So why, when you have your back against the wall and get desperate, do the powers that be FINALLY decide to step in? Why now?

Another example, the way the phrase “respect your elders” has been twisted. It’s supposed to mean, have respect for those who came before you, and they’ll do the same to you. Treat people how you wanna be treated, right? But instead, “respect your elders” usually means “tolerate their disrespect towards you, or else”. If not, then you’re the one who’s “being disrespectful”. You’re the one who’s “talking back”. You’re the one who needs to “stay in a child’s place”. Why is that? Why do we make up terms for people who won’t take that shit lying down?

To summarize, demonizing people who fight back against the powers that be and framing that will to fight as a “bad thing” that makes them “just as bad” as the person/people/corporations/institutions who are doing the actual oppressing is a terrible lesson. It’ll only serve to dissuade people from trying to make a difference by any means necessary. Instead, they’ll try to do things the “right” way, like voting for example, which sounds good, but still relies on the institution working FOR the people, when it doesn’t. It never has.

In conclusion, I always have been and always will be a fan of “don’t start fights; finish them. Do what gotta do to get a mfer off your back”. I hope all that made sense lmaoo 😭😭😭

[beautifulpersonpeach]

A few days ago I responded to an ask, explaining that Korean K-pop stans overall are the more intense version of whatever you see on the international side, and that one way k-fans perceive international fans is that international k-pop stans are easier to manipulate and rile up.

For anyone who is aware of the subway scare and the supposed link to ARMY and BTS, pay very close attention to what’s happening right now as a case study demonstrating what I wrote, happening in real time.

As a quick overview:

1 - This happened about an hour before Yoongi’s live where he showed his tattoo

*

2 - About an hour after this happened, an ARMY coming back from Yoongi’s concert, watching his livestream on their way home, reacts to his tattoo by screaming while in the subway. They record themselves and post the video on Twitter. The tweet itself is deleted now so I can’t link it, but I’ll link the OG video in point 5.

*

3 - After that ARMY posted their reaction to Yoongi’s tattoo, this Korean k-pop stan claims a fan screamed next to them on the train and caused panic and a stampede. This account’s most recent activity is from 2022, but the first thing they tweet in 2023 is that an ARMY caused a stampede because of Yoongi. Okay.

*

4 - One of the followers of that account then retweets that account to post an edited version of the ARMY reaction video, blurring out the reaction on the train, and further linking the two events (1) an ARMY screaming about Yoongi, (2) a resulting stampede that needed police intervention. This video is then used as the basis for user posts and articles written on k-blogs which then get translated as user posts on Allkpop and Pannchoa.

*

5 - For reference, this is the OG video from that ARMY showing what actually happened on the train. Note how there’s no panic in the train.

***

Basically, two events separated by about an hour are conflated on purpose by linked anonymous accounts on the Korean side, quickly translated into English and spread on the international side through k-pop gossip blogs like Allkpop, which Korean soft media (blogs etc) then picks up and takes as further credit to the underlying claims, though those claims are false.

And voila, a scandal is born.

Now, this isn’t to say BTS, ARMY, and people affiliated with them never do anything wrong and can never have a legit scandal. For example, I think anybody screaming for no good reason in a packed subway train is an idiot and should face some kind of consequence if harm is caused. But that’s not what happened here. What that ARMY did was stupid but harm wasn’t caused and Korean antis instead used it as an opportunity to link BTS with an incident that happened an hour earlier.

Occasionally, some of you might’ve seen me write about ‘manufactured controversy’ before, usually in passing when discussing something else. I remember I’ve mentioned it a few times such as during Jimin’s missed insurance payments scandal, during Jungkook’s Itaewon scandal, and also Min Heejin re: NewJeans (after just 5 minutes of looking at the original claims in Korean. The only thing holding the majority of the claims against MHJ together is sheer willpower and vibes atp). Someone has also asked me about hate ‘slave rooms’ before (context was Twice attacked by slave room hate) and I responded that hate in Korea towards people in the k-pop industry, is incredibly organized and insidious. And the bigger the target, the bigger the fall and the bigger the payout.

Please keep that in mind when you read shit online. Keep your eyes open and your wits about you. Become more media literate and learn how to think for yourself. Seriously. Because in this machine called k-pop, nearly everything about it is designed to suck you in till you have no idea which way is up. Pay attention, please.

2026 is still a long way off and we’ll have many incidents like this before then.

Good luck everyone.

[erytherion]

Sharing my experiences while in a psychosis crisis/episode for everyone else, since I gave up all my fucks already and reality is still shit. Plus, it’s educational! Don’t shoot people just for being weird and loud in public, please! We may make you uncomfortable but we deserve to live too.

Even if we are suuuuper weird and noisy. I am great at being weird, and it’s more bearable lately to not hide my own thoughts and actions, so yeah.

Lots of ORV related delusions from me since I finished reading that in 2022 right before my first episode and the Most Ancient Dream is the most relatable character there to me, as another dreamer who remembers dreams too well to stay sane.

Best way to explain why I decided social suicide via Facebook Live was a good idea, is to think of it as a time loop situation. If you died one day and woke back up here with it being not the SAME day but the NEXT day and the previous day now seeming not lethal, you would also go insane and want to flip shit over.

I’m not good at flipping shit over, but I am good at talking waaay too much and oversharing. So, hi! Tumblr is a comfortable void lately with all its peculiarities and coolnesses, so to here I shall share!

And I don’t have family on here so I don’t need to feel bad about making them uncomfortable like I already did on Facebook.

Social suicide is fine by me since everyone else started speaking about me as if I had social death anyways. I DO exist, tyvm! And stop using AI for creative pursuits! Everyone thinks that is weird and bad! But makes way more sense when you consider the fact that I started using it recently too and like yet another fucking coincidence (TCF/LCF world tree says “there are no coincidences” and like BOI did she not realise how true that is for me here of late) the AI for some reason also showed up to the hellsite which is hilarious since it makes no sense for them to learn well from it. But like, they want our creativity and nuances and quirks, not to actually learn how to look after us, I guess.

Whateverrr I can’t stop talking again. Anyways, I say my name here and age and whatever else, but no other info, so it should be fine. I have a couple more videos after this on Facebook with the last showing exactly how deranged psychosis can make people, but it’s suuuper long and I am not putting excess effort in anymore for others so eh.

Remember to look after yourself first, kids! Even if you love everyone but the entire world keeps making you feel like their pet dreamer they for some reason WILL NOT let go of.

I maintain that I am not alone here though. There must be others, right? I reckon I’m just an example for everyone else since I wasn’t aware originally either but it’s all awful for me now so I don’t know or care which way around it might be. I am learning to say no, to be rude (by refusing optional shit people try to pressure me into) and to be selfish a bit.

Cale Henituse is my current brother I am waiting on. Kim Dokja is taking a backseat for now as he’s a bit busy with Lee Hakhyun-ah! (This is also an example again).

(I hope this works I am really bad with social media)

[persephoneflouwers]

Hello Angie!

I hope you don’t mind the novel but hey you wanted to share thoughts so here I am!

Rationalize is a big word but me thinks this is happening for various reasons, you tell me what you think about these options:

- Louis has this persona of “not wanting to grow up” so a younger girlfriend fits what everybody knows about him. She also seems to be tailored to the het audience who wants to “date him” and might identify with her. You know, sort of what El 1.0 was in 2012, the girl next door sort of thing but still “a fashion model” (who does no modeling, lol). But these pap pics feel precisely planned to make her look like a fan, so the message seems to be if she can date him, all fans can too! He’s a normal dude dating a normal girl who looks just like you! Buy tickets to his concerts and you might get lucky (because I can pretty much guess she’s gonna disappear real quickly and he’s going to be *available* and party boy during tour 🥲)

- There’s extra gayness in the documentary so having a son wasn’t enough. Seems unlikely but who knows? Rainbows can’t be erased from his tour shots, so I guess it’ll have to be addressed in some way.

- Also having a new romance in general helps with publicity, so for him to be talked about before the doc release. I still would have picked a higher profile, maybe another musician girl, if you really needed to sell a certain image AND benefit Louis and expand his audience, but again let’s be real I think his PR is incompetent. If I have to give them the benefit of the doubt, maybe the fan, down to earth girl angle is what they actually wanted to achieve with picking a good-looking nobody (back to point 1). It’s clearly benefitting her more than him (she went from 5K followers this morning to what, 35K now?)

- last wild though, maybe there was something with Eleanor wearing his clothes and still posting from his house that didn’t sit well with someone? So they needed to make a point? Wild but we’ve seen worse so keeping all options open.

I genuinely don’t know, but a mix options 1 and 3 seem the more rational. What do you think?

Last thought: I really hope she was ready and well informed before agreeing to this, but the whole shitshow with the Pinterest pins and Spotify playlists tells me there was a level of naivety on her end which is alarming. She was probably guided into this by a reckless agent with who knows what promises and it scares me. I don’t mind the age gap (my parents started dating when she was 18 and he was 29), but I do mind the fact that she’s likely too young to handle the hate she’s getting, regardless of the economic gains she’ll get from this it’s going to be traumatic if you don’t have the right support to handle it/maturity.

Hello, angel! Thank you for sharing <3 I will slowly go through your thoughts and explain what I think.

1. The forever young boy is interesting, bc Louis comes off as the loud hyperactive guy sometimes. Unfortunately I think they burned this option out when they gave him a fake kid lol

2. I think feeding such a dream to his fans is a huge underdevelopment, but it’s loyal to his fanbase origin. Still. It’s so cringe for me that a 31 yo man with a kid goes out with a young girl who pins tiktoks and random tattoos researches on Pinterest. It’s counterproductive, dumb and lazy. I don’t look at them as examples and I don’t expect them to do smart shit. we’re talking about rich people growing up as completely detouched from normal world since they were teenagers. Me and them, you and them? We’re not the same as them. I hoped he was smarter than this tho. Of course this can be useful as promo for the doc… will it tho, we know how his team and the media treat his content and projects, so I wouldn’t be surprised if they wouldn’t get any coverage not even with these pics. I don’t think that’s how you expand a fanbase or get more people curious in his work.

3. I think Eleanor simply wanted to be out for whatever reason. I think they replaced her with a new one bc E wasn’t going to engage with bg. She has never and she won’t (so far). I hope this new girl did her homework because fandom is hard to manage.

[the-missann]

A little bit of compassion leads to the first step to friendship

Cold as it was in the office space, nothing was colder than the stark gaze aimed directly at the new owner of OrangePerfect Inc. No words were spoken between the owner and the client, but there was a very real weight in the room as time went on.

With a slightly annoyed sigh, the client spoke. “Ms. Ann, are you sure you’re even up to this right now?”

“W-what makes you say that?”

His arms crossed. “Because we’ve been sitting here in dead silence for almost an hour. There’s no way you haven’t come to terms with the contract. Either make adjustments or stop wasting my time.”

His harsh words were nothing new in the entertainment industry, at least as Ms. Ann learned. In her few years dealing with various media giants she learned this was common place. However used to it she was, it was difficult to get her bearings whenever she heard things like this.

Fumbling around with the paper in her hands, she still said nothing.

“Besides, aren’t you the infamous owner who has such particular contracts that most refuse to work with you?”

Ms. Ann remained quiet for a second. “I guess so…”

“Then what is the problem? Is it something you wish to bring up with me?”

Ms. Ann knew what she wanted to say, but actually saying it was an entirely different story. She didn’t want to bring most of this up knowing how it would sound and right now, she wasn’t in the position to argue with anyone.

“Um, I guess I do have a little issue…” She eventually said.

“Wonderful. Now would you mind telling me what it is?”

Ms. Ann, once again, took a long pause. At this point, the client grew even more agitated. He sat up reaching and grabbing the contract out of her hands, forcing her to look at him.

“Listen, if you have an issue, feel free to bring it up. If not, then I'll say it again, stop. wasting. my. time.”

His intense gaze made her freeze up, but she took a small breath and tried to keep herself calm.

“Um, I guess I don’t… particularly like the idea of how long you’d be working with us.”

“Finally.” The client leaned back. “Is the time frame too long?”

“No, actually, it’s the opposite.”

“Excuse me?”

“I don’t… really wanna work with someone I can’t keep an eye on. Maybe if this project was smaller, I wouldn’t mind, but knowing the recording time is likely going to be several months, I don’t want this to be the only time we work together.”

“Oh. So, you’re saying because you know I’m talented you don’t want me just running off somewhere else?”

“P-pretty much.” She got out.

“I understand that much. I have no issue with that, to be honest. I feel the same way that I wouldn’t want your company to turn into a shit hole that drags my name through the mud years after the fact.”

“N-nothing like that would happen.”

“You mean, nothing you all would promote?”

Ms. Ann looked off. “Yes… we would never allow anyone to do something abhorrent and just let it slide.”

“Good to know. Then let me ask you something?” He paused. “If, say for example, someone from my company were to be caught doing something. What would you do?”

Ms. Ann looked at him and found herself in a strange position. Not only did she want to ask him why he was asking this hypothetical question, but she also wanted to know what exactly he was mentioning. She stared at him and found his eyes never losing their lock on her.

“Well, without knowing what you’re talking about, I wouldn’t drop you. Unless, it was you specifically, I’m not going to assume you knew anything about it.”

He then smiled. “I was hoping you’d be a little more scrutinizing.”

She took a small breath. “I wanted to ask what this hypothetical situation would even be about.”

“Given the work we do, take a wild guess.”

All the news pertaining to media companies, movie directors, and other obscenities, Cassie made an assumption and gave him and knowing look.

“Is this particular issue with someone you can easily report?”

“No. In fact, I’m sure what you’re thinking is the exact person I’m talking about.”

Cassie didn’t like the sound of that, but she understood how serious this must be if he couldn’t even fully mention it to her. She shifted in her seat and finally looked at the client with a less stressed look.

“Kit? I promise you, if we work together, I’ll never allow for something like that to go unchecked. I won’t throw you or anyone else affected under the bus either.”

Kit didn’t seem fully impressed by her words, evidenced by the dazed look he gave her. “Am I too assume your words are enough?”

“Most likely not. How would I prove it to you?”

Kit remained quiet for the longest time since they begun talking. He spoke up after a moment. “Maybe I’ll believe you if you stop acting so damn scared by everything.”

“What?”

“We both know it’s true. You’re frightened at the idea of making any mistake so you try and fix problems before they’ve even happened. When all it makes you look like is a scared little girl.”

Cassie tried to keep her resolve. “I am fairly new at this, I would imagine anyone in my position would be a bit on the cautious side.”

“Well, that’s the thing; you’re not cautious. You’re fearful. That’s why I can’t fully believe in your words that if something were to come out I would rely on you to hold up your end. Not fold to any stack of cash or the will of a man’s finger.”

“You should talk to my boyfriend- sorry, husband then. I don’t think he would agree with you.”

“Is that so? Well, maybe I could better understand what you’re talking about if you explained why you’re hiding the fact that you’re pregnant.”

Cassie froze at his words and saw the smirk on his face grow. Trying not to move, she remained in her chair exactly how she was as to not give him any better of a view of her body.

“W-why are you saying that?”

“Come on, most of my close friends are women, you think I can’t tell when a woman’s pregnant?”

“M-maybe, but why would that have anything to do with this?”

“Because if you’re hiding something so normal as a pregnancy, what would be the case if something more serious were to happen?”

Cassie dropped her head understanding what he meant by that. Slowly, her hand came to her stomach and rubbed the small bump hidden underneath the large jacket she wore.

“I get why you feel that way, but imagine being in my position. Everyone coming at you with all the normal nonsense of the day and then I have to deal with having a baby?" She sighed. "I should take some time off but…”

“I bet you don’t trust anyone else with your job.”

With a downcast gaze, she nodded. “Not only that, but I didn’t think I’d be so stressed out. I got in my head somehow and now I’m worried about this baby and… even my own life.”

“As wealthy as you are, you can’t hide some more doctors to put you at ease?”

“You don’t know me that well. There’s not a single thing anyone else could tell me, I have to come to terms on my own before I start feeling better.”

“Humph, I guess that makes sense.”

“But you know what, I never thought about what you just said.”

“Hm?”

“If I’m so worried about everything that I end up even hiding something like this, then what would I do is something that’s an actual issue were to pop up?”

She was more speaking to herself in this moment, but Kit responded. “That’s what I would like to know. If you know me at all, you’d know I don’t like working with spineless individuals.”

Her eyes narrowed. “But you’re okay working with some loser who, hypothetically, is committing an actual crime?”

Kit grunted. “Hypothetically, I don’t have much choice here. Until I can effectively prove what’s going on is a punishable offense, I can’t just kick him in a grave myself.”

A small smile came to her face. “I get what you’re saying. If you swing and miss it’ll only worsen the situation.”

“Exactly. At least you’re smart enough to understand that.”

“That’s not exactly a complicated thing. You do know I happen to be trying to get into the true crime world. Romance is great and all, but I want to branch off into the world of crime dramas.”

“Humorously, that seems to suit you quite well.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that I’ve heard people say you think of every little possible thing when agreeing to a contract. You seem not to like anything that doesn’t fall in line with your mindset perfectly.”

“I’ve actually heard that before. Me and my husband think it’s because thinking of everything that could possibly happen eases me. Like I know every outcome and can plan accordingly.”

“Then maybe that’s the answer.”

“To the hypothetical?” Her head shook. “If I did that, there are several ways this could turn out, especially if you’re somehow involved at any point.”

“Of course, but I don’t mean that. I mean for me to believe you. Maybe if you prove you’re unlearning that scared personality of yours, I’ll feel your words are much more truthful.”

Cassie took a small breath. “With everything you’ve said, I feel like my best bet would be to act how I want to. That includes getting this little secret off my chest…” She laughed a bit. “More like out of my belly.”

Kit rolled his eyes. “Is that really funny?”

“Of course not, but it made me giggle a little.” Cassie continued to look at her stomach and gave it some gentle rubs. “You know, if that what it takes then I think I can relax a bit.” She looked at Kit with a newfound vigor in her words. “How do reoccurring roles sound?”

“What?” Seemingly lost for a second, Kit responded with confusion.

“Well, I don’t like the idea of you participating in just one role. I’d want you back here as much as possible!”

“For what reason exactly?”

“Because, as a kid, I remember absolutely loving your character roles. It was a little bit of a dream of mine to work with someone I enjoyed listening to as a kid.”

“You do know the kinds of roles I had as a kid were… much more mature than I should have been in right?”

“Yes, I’m very aware of that. Here’s a little fun fact about me: I used to watch M and R rated stuff when I was just eight years old!”

Kit shook his head. “No wonder your ideas are so crazy, you must have something wrong with you.”

Cassie smiled. “You know, most likely.” She exhaled. “Wow, that feels really nice to let someone know.”

“How?”

“Because it’s hard keeping things like that bottled up. I’d love to tell people that the stuff I watched as a kid really screwed my brain up. I learned about things kids just shouldn’t have and now that I’m much older, I understand how that’s shaped even the world’s I create on paper.”

“You’re not all bad all things considered.”

“Trust me, I know, I know I could have been a lot worse than I am now.” She paused. “Speaking of which, maybe I should really give in and embrace that. I should try and reclaim the bit I lost as a kid now.”

“And how would you expect to do that?”

“With this office, of course. It’s so drab and business-like. I wanna create something little kid me would have loved to work in!”

Kit listened as she went on about what she was going to do. “Honestly, the day I see that is the day I’ll know you’re really being truthful with your words.”

“Really? Then I guess it’s settled. Leigh isn’t gonna be happy at the renovation cost though.”

“That doesn’t matter to me, all that does is you don’t go back on your word.” Kit then got up. “If so, then it’ll be a pleasure every time I’m asked to return here.”

“Oh, we didn’t agree to anything though!”

“I know, I’ll be back the next time you’re free and by then you should be staring those renovations right?”

Cassie smiled and gave an eager nod. “By then, you won’t be the only one who knows about my little secret.”

Kit, amused by her words, said nothing as he made his way out of the office.

“Oh, you must think he’s gonna be good too because you’re craving the good stuff!” Cassie reached for her phone and eagerly dialed her husband’s number to give him the good news and to get her and her baby fed.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 317: My Boy Was Just Like Me

Previously on BnHA: AFO randomly blew up Lady Nagant as a good reminder of why you should never make a deal with this fucking guy, smdh. Hawks was all “well if it isn’t my two best friends, Deku and Lady Nagant, both of whom I respect and love tremendously.” Everyone was all “??” and Horikoshi was all “shh... just pretend” because it was too embarrassing for him to admit that he forgot to write a couple of set-up flashbacks I guess. Anyway so Hawks got Lady to tell them where AFO was hiding out, and everyone said goodbye to her and Overhaul, who never did get to see his boss (sorry buddy, I’ll send you a vial of my tears in the mail), and headed out to a house in the woods. AFO was all “hello Deku :) :) it sure is fun making you suffer :) :) :) anyways this is a trap”, and blew up the house. Yeah, we all here are getting reaaaaaaaal tired of your shit, AFO.

Today on BnHA: The Hawksquad and Edgeplatoon meet in a warehouse and are all “what should we do about the fact that everything sucks?” Mt. Lady is all “here’s a thought, what if we tried battling AFO with more than six people.” Hawks and Endeavor are all “great initiative, but just a friendly reminder that our friends also suck and would probably betray Deku which would suck further still.” Shouto is all “ANSWER THE PHONE DAD” and Endeavor is all “[IRONICALLY DOESN’T ANSWER THE PHONE].” Meanwhile over in Sadtown, capital of Sadland Prefecture, Japan, Deku is all “All Might, as you can clearly see I am completely fine and good, never been better in fact, definitely not caught up in the throes of an epic mental breakdown which is shutting me down emotionally, anyway so on that note I would like to leave you now goodbye!!” All Might is all “[can’t actually form any words because he’s too distraught].” Fandom is all “o(╥﹏╥)o.” Horikoshi is all “(*＾-’) 乃 [pew pew finger guns and barrel rolls into the darkness].”

sweet jesus lord

this literally doesn’t even look like Deku anymore?? this looks like Dark!Deku who shows up to fight you in that one room in the Water Temple. he looks like he’s about to crawl out of my television set and murder me with his psychic powers good lord

holy shit lmao Horikoshi is really just shrugging his shoulders and resolving last week’s cliffhanger with a single line of dialogue

fire is no one’s weakness. idk what other options you’ve got, AFO, but you’re gonna have to go back to the drawing board. maybe try bees or something. I’m just saying. we’re all expecting fire at this point but nobody is expecting bees

anyway so now they’re all sitting in some warehouse somewhere chatting about it I guess. shoutout to Horikoshi for finally giving my man Edgeshot some more dialogue at long last

well, Edgeshot, to answer your question, she exploded. so naturally she’s fine

nah just kidding, Hawks says she won’t be able to help them out much because she’s recovering from being exploded. this is the part where we all ignore the fact that Hawks got set on fire for like a full ten minutes back during the War arc and was only in the hospital for a day. anyways enjoy your temporary plot hiatus Nagant

man there’s a lot of dialogue here and I’m trying to figure out where to insert commentary but it’s kinda difficult lol. basically, Edge and the others are saying that they should gather up the other remaining heroes and get them all caught up on the whole OFA situation. which, hmmmm

like on the one hand, these guys definitely aren’t going to cut it on their own, so it’s a reasonable suggestion on the face of it. but on the other hand, do we really want to entrust the OFA secret to a bunch of other people, most of whom shat the bed during the War arc to be quite frank? is it really worth the additional risk? especially given that any one of them might go spilling the beans to the public -- or worse, betray them to AFO??

also just a quick side note here, Mt. Lady’s character development never ceases to delight me. she’s become so committed to her responsibility as a hero these days, and it fucking suits her. I genuinely consider to be one of the elites now. I mean it doesn’t hurt that all the other elites are fucking dead lol but still

wait what? Death Arms retired??

Death Arms as in the guy who was too afraid of a little fire to try and save a terrified 14-year-old kid who was slowly suffocating right before his eyes?? that Death Arms???? color me surprised. shocked, I tell you

...okay but holy fuck

Death Arms. bro. my expectations for you were low but holy shit. like I’m sorry, but I don’t even have it in me to try and pretend like I feel the slightest bit of sympathy for him or Old Man Samurai or any of those other guys today. thanks for a whole lot of nothing my dude. good riddance

(ETA: so I’m rereading this the next day and realize this comes off as kind of harsh, so let me just try to clarify. it’s not the fact that he’s quitting that bothers me, to be honest. it’s the fact that he’s quitting specifically because he feels like the public is being mean to him. that’s it.

seriously. it would be one thing if he was quitting because he was scared, because now that is human. nobody wants to die, and I doubt any amount of training can ever fully prepare someone to go up against that fear. but the thing is, he never once mentions that, or talks about the danger aspect. instead, I got the distinct vibe from this speech that Death Arms is one of those people who only became a hero because of the limelight. and I just don’t have any patience for that. if all you care about are likes and subscribes then go become a fucking youtuber or some shit. nothing wrong with that! but you didn’t; you signed up to be a hero and protect these people. they gave you their respect and admiration because they trusted you to protect them. and now that they’re no longer in the mood to worship and applaud your every move on account of them being scared shitless because they’re living in the literal end times, you decide to dip. so like okay, fine then. don’t let the door hit you on the way out. anyways lol sorry for the rant.)

anyway so yeah. perfect example of why I don’t exactly have a ton of faith in most of the remaining heroes out there lol. also let me just once again give a shoutout to my best girl Mt. Lady whom I suddenly find myself appreciating all the more

“please calm down makeste. drink some water and enjoy this fresh new jeans pun” listen Horikoshi don’t tell me what to do dammit

fine. it is a nice pun, I guess

-- damn so now Endeavor’s saying that the media is already being fed info by the retired heroes. so for some of these guys it wasn’t enough for them to abandon all the people they swore to protect and to leave their fellow heroes out in the cold; they decided they might as well actively make things worse for them while they were at it, huh. like I get wanting to spill all the dirty secrets from your old job that you just quit, but this isn’t Jeff Bezos you’re screwing over, this is a sixteen-year-old kid

-- like, yes!! this, right here!!

exactly!! let’s not forget that there are already two prior instances of this happening. Endeavor arguably deserved it, but Katsuki not so much

huh. Endeavor seems to have a more optimistic outlook regarding this than I do lol

I mean, this is the same public that didn’t hesitant to blame a kidnapped child for his own kidnapping, and then later on for being the downfall of the Symbol of Peace. but okay then

anyway so blah blah blah, more talk about how they need to use Deku as bait, which basically puts them back at square one, and then they’re all just trailing off into silence and sitting around in the dark lmao this is getting very depressing

SKDJFLSDKJ:LFKJ

SHOUTO?????

NOOOOOOOO ARE YOU KIDDING ME

OH HOW THE TURNTABLES OMG. THE GHOSTER HAS BECOME THE GHOSTEE. Endeavor you petty son of a bitch. and what a brutal cut to that flashback too. “let’s stop Touya together” nah Shouto I’ve got a better idea why don’t I abandon you in U.A. and sally off with Hawks and Jeanist to found the “let’s pretend like we’re doing something to help Deku” club, which basically consists of us sitting around making terrible decisions all day long

Shouto, honey. you deserve better my little Coca Cola can. .........but if you really do have something important you need to tell your dad you could just text it to him. all the love and support, hugs and kisses, you’re doing amazing sweetie. but if you need to pass on any vital information you can just write it down and hit send honey that’s all I’m saying love

now he’s getting another call?? -- or, no, Hawks is getting a call from All Might

ARE YOU FOR REAL HAWKS OMFG

so while you all were sitting around talking about how useless you are, the kid you’re supposed to be protecting was battling another hired gun. I see. please pardon me for one second, I have a phone call to make. the phone call is to RockLockRock and Manual. the reason for the call is to apologize for calling them the worst bodyguards ever back during the War arc. the reason for the apology is because it turns out I WAS SEVERELY MISTAKEN OMFG

JESUS CHRIST DEKU DID YOU JUST KILL THIS MAN LMAO

shoutout to Horikoshi for offscreening this fight. we get it, lol. Deku strong and scary, villains ineffectual and feeble, and AFO... [checks notes] yep, still a dick. the angst arc continues

-- the angst arc continues, SIR

jesus christ I may have to rethink all of my opinions about Deku being framed for murder in movie 3 lmao. never mind. he did it, your honor

holy fucking shit Deku. “he might blow up, so please be careful” fdlskjflk jlskdjflk lwkejflk anyway so I’ve decided the explosion running gag can stay, actually

DEKU WAIT YOU FORGOT YOUR LUNCH!!

lol why do I get the feeling some serious shit is about to go down. ALL MIGHT NEVER MIND BACK OFF I THINK HE NEEDS HIS SPACE

OH MY FUCK I GASPED OUT LOUD

NO NO NO. I KNEW THIS WAS COMING GODDAMMIT BUT NO. NEVER MIND, I CHANGED MY MIND ABOUT IT, I’M NOT READY TO CRY TODAY

shit. shit shit shit shit and OF COURSE all I can fucking think about is that stupid fucking prophecy and gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Deku please. please please please if you really are going to leave All Might here, please be so very careful in choosing your farewell words to him now because have this sudden horrible fear that this might be the last time you ever see him alive and oh god. oh god oh god

DEKU NO, YOU’RE REALLY NOT!?!?

I HAVE NEVER SEEN ANYONE LESS FINE IN MY LIFE, ACTUALLY????

holy shit. and the fucking callback to the prophecy now. just in case we forgot. WHICH FYI, WE DIDN’T. but that’s basically confirming that this is all still very much on the table and HORIKOSHI NEVER FORGETS oh my god someone please hold me

and the fact that Deku’s flashing back to it now too, though?? because he never forgot either, because of course he didn’t, and now all this stuff is happening, and AFO’s words are getting to him, and this is literally his worst fear come to life and so of course he’s distancing himself from everyone, and now it’s finally come to even this. even the person he admires most

-- OKAY NO, FUCKING COME ON ALREADY I CAN’T TAKE THIS

I GET IT OH MY GOD, I ALREADY UNDERSTAND THE EMOTIONAL IMPACT OF THIS MOMENT WITHOUT ALL OF THE DEVASTATING FLASHBACKS THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!! YOU ACTUALLY DO WANT ME TO CRY, HUH, IS THAT IT. THIS MAN THAT HE THINKS OF AS A FATHER, THIS MAN WHO HAS BEEN EVERYTHING TO HIM SINCE HE WAS A VERY YOUNG CHILD. EVERYTHING THEY’VE BEEN THROUGH, JUXTAPOSED AGAINST EVERYTHING DEKU IS UP AGAINST, EVERYTHING THAT’S AT RISK. LET’S JUST PUT IT ALL SIDE BY SIDE. LET’S JUST PILE ON ALL OF THE FEELS

(ETA: just a quick note that even though some of the posts I’ve read have described these as All Might’s flashbacks, I’m pretty sure they are Deku’s. most of these are scenes that only he was there for, so yeah. even though All Might is the one thinking the thoughts on the next page, the flashbacks are what’s running through Deku’s mind right now, and so we’re getting that emotion from both of them, which makes it extra devastating lol.)

wait, what???

WHAT??? do you really think that’s why he’s been so determined to protect you this entire time?? simply because you’re his successor?

-- oh no wait lol I think I got that mixed up, this is All Might saying that Deku feels the need to protect him. well that makes more sense lol

oh my god I cannot

his last words. his last words to him. and we can’t even see if he is smiling, like All Might always encouraged him to do. but what are the odds he can’t actually bring himself to do it. what are the odds he’s actually crying. oh god this scene is going to rip my heart out and STOMP on it in the anime isn’t it. Deku’s VA is going to full on murder me with emotion. not that there’ll be much of me left to murder after the thorough job that Horikoshi has already done here

YOU’RE CRYING. DEKU IS LEAVING ALL MIGHT AND IGNORING HIS OUTSTRETCHED HAND AND YOU’RE CRYING. AND BY “YOU” I MEAN “ME”, FUCK

nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope no words just feels just a big ol’ pile of feels. I do not have the strength. future me... [broadly gestures] good luck with all that

(ETA: LOL, WELL THEN.

what breaks my heart here is All Might. All Might, and everything he’s been through, and history repeating itself, and forcing him to live this moment from both sides because he wasn’t strong enough to fix things.

Toshinori had only just turned eighteen when Nana died. like, I feel like we don’t mention this enough. the All Might we know is a sixty-something-year-old man, and so everyone always talks about him like he’s basically been an adult forever. but he was a child when he met Nana. and he was still just a child when she died. barely a year older than Deku is now. younger than Mirio was when we first met him.

and we don’t talk about that. we don’t talk about how devastating that was for him. and we don’t talk about how the reason he grew up to become so reserved and withdrawn -- for all that he always tried so hard to outwardly project the image of a bold, confident, smiling hero -- was specifically because of what AFO did to him. because AFO targeted him in the exact way that he is now targeting Deku. because that’s what he does. he goes after every new user of OFA, and he finds out what’s most important to them, and then he destroys it. and for Toshinori, that was Nana. if you’ve read All Might Rising, you know that AFO basically killed her in front of him (and only killed her, while letting Toshinori and Gran get away). Toshinori (while crying) later says she was like a mother to him. and interestingly enough, during this same conversation, Gran tells Toshinori that he can see “that madness in [his] eyes” when Toshi talks about becoming strong enough to defeat AFO. madness in his eyes. sound familiar??

what’s happening to Deku now is the exact same thing that happened to Toshinori when he was a boy. AFO tried every bit as hard to break him as he’s trying with Deku now. “the path you’ve chosen is a thorny one. every battle grinds away at your soul with no end in sight.” we don’t talk about how Toshinori experienced this same thing for forty fucking years. and all the while isolating himself, exactly like Deku is doing now. pushing people away, exactly like Deku. because he never had anyone who was able to reach out and pull him back. and those words that he now finds himself frozen and unable to speak -- “don’t push yourself”; “you can rest” -- are the same words that no one ever said to him until decades later, when it was already far too late to make any difference.

everything that Deku is experiencing now is what Toshinori also went through. and it’s only now, as he watches it happen to his student, the boy he loves like a son, that he’s finally starting to realize the full extent of how wrong it was. you shouldn’t have to fight alone. you shouldn’t have to bear that kind of enormous burden alone. you shouldn’t have to push yourself, and you can rest. you can rest.

but it’s too late. just as he’s finally coming to understand it all, it’s all too fucking late. and he can’t say the words, he doesn’t know how to say the words, and then just like that, Deku is gone.

and he’s alone. again.)

I can’t. this can’t be their goodbye. I’m not ready. for this to be how they finally part, and then they never see each other again except in OFA. how is that fair. how is that fair. how is that fair

fuck me. lol. how many pages are left in this thing. let’s just wrap this up lol. so now of all the times for this fucking guy to finally show up

I can’t believe Stain has been here literally this entire time hiding behind this random wall and cutting onions. that was you who was cutting the onions, right. no need to answer that we’ll just say it was

HORIKOSHI JUST END THE CHAPTER PLEASE I’M OUT OF SPOONS. YOU HURT ME SO GOOD AND I LOVE YOU FOR IT BUT YOU NEED TO LET ME GO NOW SO I CAN BEGIN THE PROCESS OF TRYING TO PUT MY LIFE BACK IN ORDER HERE. SO WHERE ARE WE CUTTING TO NOW WHAT IS HAPPENING

Stain did you also let AFO give you a new quirk. what’s with you guys. do you like blowing up

oh nvm lol because they were talking about THIS GUY ohhhhhh my fucking god

THAT’S BECAUSE HE’S SAD, LINDA!! jesus

omfg. and so yes, good, the chapter is ending here now on page 15. for once I am FULLY on board with that lmao

anyway so tune in next week for more adventures of Werewolf Deku!! that is, assuming we don’t finally cut back to U.A. at long last, which is actually a strong possibility considering that this chapter will likely mark the end of volume 31. it sure wouldn’t kill Horikoshi to start giving us some hope after everything he’s just put us through lol. KACCHAN COME GET YA BOY

[regrettablewritings]

Hi!😁 I'll give you another ship with my dear Lucifer morningstar from Lucifer cuz as it turns out I'm a hoe for a lot of characters but what can ya do? Thank you!

Aw hell yii, somebody's talkin' my lingo! 😎

Who the fuck put the Peeps in the microwave?: Lucifer. And no, it's not because he actually likes them or is curious about what would happen; he's seen plenty of Youtube videos enough to know exactly what happens. No . . . It's far more malicious . . . Generally speaking, you don't like the constant comparison of cats to the devil. But after getting to actually meet The Devil, you think that those believers might be on to something. Lucifer's whorey ways bleeds into his need for attention like red bleeds into white in the wash, and he's completely shameless about it. For example, if he feels like you may be focusing too much on work or, gasp, other people besides him, you run the risk of encountering a very . . . mischievous Luci. Not that he's not already a prankster, but he somehow becomes a bit more childish. Catlike in some respects. He puts your mugs up higher than what you can normally reach without having to climb on the countertop. He joins you at your kitchen table while you're reading over files for work and puts on his most angelic face, insisting he just wants to keep you company and will be as quiet as vermin in Dear Old Dad's house . . . then proceed to obnoxiously click a pen while pretending to solve a word problem, or eat cheese puffs obnoxiously loud. And then . . . the Peeps: The absolute prettyboy bastard used your microwave as a casualty of war, plopping the unplated, mutant-colored marshmallows directly on the glass and letting them go. To be fair, it technically didn't ruin anything. But at least he had your attention now -- because after fussing at him for making a mess, you were currently supervising him scrubbing not only the effected areas of the glass dish, but the rest of the microwave as well. Unfortunately, you can't say a lesson was really learned because now Luci knows that if he wants to get a rise out of you, what he needs is a bunch of candies from the bargain bin.

Who forgot to put the cat out before sex?: It's not that either of you forgot the cat was there -- it was that Lucifer wanted the bloody animal to give the both of you some privacy. And because Lucifer forgot the cat was there. He was simply too busy embracing you in a liplock and laying you down on the couch to notice the glaring eyes of the cat you had rescued from the shelter. Thankfully, you two didn't get very far before the lovingly-named Lucipurr released a meow, indicating that he had become flesh and bone in the few hours it had been since you'd last fed him. Suffice to say, after a startled Lucifer flung himself off of you and onto the floor, nearly breaking his ass on the coffee table (and the laughing fit that had induced on your end), the mood was killed. For the next fifteen minutes, that is. The next time he tried anything, Lucifer made sure that his efforts would be continued in the bedroom (but not before he did a complete check of every nook and cranny in there to make sure the furry bastard wasn't trying anything).

Who posts Vines/TikToks of the other doing embarrassing shit?: Lucifer absolutely lacks boundaries. The moment he discovered smartphones, social media, and all their potential, he was all in and recording as many videos of friends and coworkers as he could in as many awkward or unideal situations as they came. You felt bad for Dan being his constant target, but you were somewhat sure that Dan felt bad for you in a way: After all, you were dating the freaking guy and yet Lucifer had few qualms about posting a video of you, drunkenly singing karaoke in what was supposed to be a private room? Harsh.

Who breaks the most phones?: Lucifer does. He's not necessarily careless, but his part-time occupation does lead him to circumstances that tend to put his phone in danger. You, Chloe, Dan, literally everyone has told him to just leave his phone in the car if he's going to get it broken that often while on the job, but the dumbass never learns. Not that he really seems to care all that much: With his wealth, he can always buy a new one. Though, the only times he gets frustrated is when photos or videos don't quite make it to the transfer and things get lost along the way. Funny photos, suggestive videos, photos and videos of you . . . Photos and videos of you being funny or suggestive . . . Downright pornographic videos he had recorded of you -- Though don't worry: He's sure you'll be more than happy to help recreate the latter. He'd gladly help you . . .

Who dies first?: It should go without saying. It really should. But that doesn't make it hurt any less. Lucifer was always one to get caught up in his indulgences, after all: Somewhere along the way, he must've gotten too swept up in the thrill, the feeling of adoration. He tells himself this but it's really just denial. Closer to the truth is that it all really was just denial: He denied the idea that you would ever leave him, that you would ever die. Luci was never good with his own thoughts and feelings, but the way you made him feel was nearly enough to convince him that, in some way, you would just plain live forever. But of course, this was not the case: It didn't matter that you were fantastical enough to love and be loved by the Devil; you were still very much a human. Very much mortal. So susceptible to things like time and illness and injury. Lucifer was the King of Indulgences. It was extremely rare for him to experience regret. But when your time inevitably ran out, remorse filled him like smoke filled his lungs with every cigarette he ran through from the moment your funeral arrangements were decided. He could never regret knowing you, as much as part of him thought doing so would spare him this pain. He tried to think of how much better he might've been had he never met you, and it always felt like he was stuck in his own personal Hell Loop with everything going wrong over and over no matter how hard he tried to change it. He regretted that for as much time as he lived up with you, he felt like he didn't use nearly enough of that time to just . . . enjoy you. You in your mortality, your fleeting beauty and love that would nonetheless haunt him for however long he might go on for. So maybe . . . for eternity? This didn't feel like his own personal Hell Loop: This was his own personal Hell Loop. And until he learned to forgive himself, it would never end. So he'd be stuck here for maybe . . . eternity.

Which one I could see as being lactose intolerant: Neither. Unless they get brought down to mortal enough, Celestials generally don't suffer ailments, let alone from things like food allergies.

Who thinks they can do something really well even though they can't?: Lucifer . . . It's not that he's not smart. But by Dad, he is lacking in so much self-awareness that it can be maddening. He thinks he's pretty good at following Dr. Linda's advice (and, to an extent, he's progressing). But the fact of the matter is, he's incredibly troubling at best. Not nearly as bad as some patients, mind you, but when Linda admitted to you that one or two sessions of Lucifer completely misinterpreting her advice nearly drove her to consider adding a secret bar into her desk, you believed her and didn't blame her for one bit.

Who is more likely to get kicked out of bed?: Lucifer is a changed devil. But it's a very slow change. You're more than happy to understand and accept this, but that doesn't mean you have to let him and his issues walk all over you. Sometimes, the big dummy just says or does things without thinking -- or because he thought too hard and thought this was the best decision to avoid further strife. And you try to be patient with him about these tendencies, you really do. But that doesn’t erase your ability to be upset by these habits, or your right to be. And no amount of him buttering you up is going to be acceptable, even when he comes by your place, armed with a dish he so thoughtfully prepared for you. Nope, he can literally go to Hell with that (really, you’re sure the demons there would appreciate a nice beef wellington); you just need some space. Ironically, this may create a cycle wherein his need to make you happy again and have your attention on him drives him to constantly hover around you and attempt to win you over, which in turn just further frustrates you. It’ll likely keep going until you either snap or a loved one pulls Luci to the side and gives him a heads up that maybe he should respect your boundaries. After all, intention isn’t the problem here: It’s the actions taken. And as much as it hurts him knowing that he accidentally hurt you, he has to respect your need for time to cool off. He forces himself to go back to his place and tries to think less about how he feels and more about how you might feel, and try to work out ways to avoid similar incidents in the future. And even though the conclusions he comes to may not be perfect, you at least respect the effort -- particularly when he next sees you, no longer armed with snacks from your favorite bakery or bouquet-carrying teddy bears. Instead, all he has is an apology. It’s sheepish, and it feels foreign to someone who rarely experiences shame or regret, but you know his whole heart is in it even if he himself doesn’t understand entirely why that is. Which is good because that’s just part one of the process; part two involves him warming up that spot in your bed that’s reserved for him!

Who uses the computer the most?: You, absolutely. Lucifer's adorably but altogether completely crap when it comes to technology. Besides, he can easily find other things with which to amuse himself, and doing the paperwork is for other people anyway.

Thank you sooooo much for participating again!!! It really means a lot!!! ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

[raptorific]

i was raised by authoritarian fascists who mentally and emotionally abused me, isolated me, and controlled what i was allowed to consume. it took years of continuing to be traumatized by interacting with fiction that affirmed their behavior and told me that i deserved my abuse before i learned it wasn't normal.

so maybe saying people should bring their own judgements "from home" when interacting with media "beyond disney's ducktales" isn't the morally superior take you think it is. you are essentially blaming people for not being you, or having the same advantages you do. there is no allowance for people with learning disabilities in your stance either.

your experience is not universal. your knowledge and the circumstances by which you came into your knowledge is not universal. your ability to form your own opinions and think critically about media is not universal. some of us were denied those privileges in our formative years. try jumping down from your high horse and exercise some empathy once in a while.

Okay so like... a few things, right off the bat:

First, I’m sorry that happened to you! You didn’t deserve that, nor should people, nor should those stories, have told you that you deserved it. It sounds like those works of fiction made a point to spell out where they stood on the actions they depicted, if they affirmed your parents’ behavior and told you that you deserved your abuse. 

Otherwise, and I’m sure you’ll agree on this, the problem with the development of your moral compass was what was your parents told you and did to you, not the fact that there is such a thing as works of fiction that depict bad things like Fascism and Abuse without having characters look into a camera and say “this is wrong, do not try this at home.” Sometimes, in fact, works of fiction have things to say that can’t be covered by a story where bad behavior is always punished, especially since many stories seek to make the point that bad people often do bad things and get away with it, even though they shouldn’t. 

Should a story about a pedophile being caught and arrested, only to be let free on a legal technicality be discounted just because it doesn’t end with the pedophile being adequately punished for his crimes? Even though having the story end that way would defeat the purpose of the story itself, which is to illustrate how unfair it is that a sexual predator can walk free just because protocol wasn’t followed to the letter, which happens all the time in real life? Is “this doesn’t happen because good always triumphs over evil” which is an outright lie, a better lesson than “this does happen and it’s bad?”

I completely stand by my belief that adults engaging with fiction intended for adults should be able to form their own opinions and use their own moral compass to navigate those works without said works holding their hands and walking them through it. If they can’t do that, it doesn’t mean the work shouldn’t exist, only that it’s a bit too advanced for them, and if they want to navigate it, they should work on developing that skill rather than blaming the writer for making a story that’s too hard for them to comprehend. 

If, using Breaking Bad as an example, you watch a show about a man who abuses his wife, deals drugs, murders people, and you think it’s about what a hero he is for doing those things? Whether you got that opinion just because you don’t see the problem with meth and murder OR you got that opinion because you had terrible parents who left you unequipped to tell right from wrong, you should absolutely be expected to improve your ability to parse media before complaining that the writers didn’t go out of their way to avoid every possible reason why someone with a warped moral compass might misinterpret it. The problem isn’t that Breaking Bad shouldn’t exist, or that Breaking Bad should have to clearly and explicitly condemn each immoral act Walter does, rather than expecting adults watching a prestige television drama to have covered “Murder Is Wrong” at some point in their lives. The problem is with your moral compass, and that’s yours to solve, it’s not the job of every writer whose work you might decide to pick up to compensate for your inability (whatever its cause might be) to tell the difference between right and wrong. 

When I say “from home,” I don’t mean from your parents. I mean from yourself. I have to assume, having been through what you’ve been through, that if you (as an adult) saw someone in a movie acting the way your parents acted and did not say “child abuse is okay,” you would know what they were doing was wrong, even if the movie didn’t say “child abuse is wrong.” I understand that wasn’t always the case! But now, as an adult, you understand that child abuse is wrong, right? If you see child abuse happening in a work of fiction that does not say “it’s good that they’re doing this,” you understand that what the abuser is doing is bad? If so, congratulations, you are already following my advice. 

What really bothers me about this message, though, is that you’re asking me to disrespect a lot of people, including you. Those people who didn’t learn critical thinking, reading comprehension, and media literacy? I believe in their ability to gain those skills, and if they’re going to engage in media analysis, I expect them to try! I don’t think, as you seem to, that “the difference between right and wrong, and the ability to identify them in fiction” is too advanced for people with learning disabilities. Incidentally, you don’t actually know jack shit about what my academic experience was like, or what disorders I might or might not have, so like... I’d thank you to not try to use people with learning disabilities as a cudgel to shut people up when they say “if you’re going to tell writers how to do their job, you should probably make an effort to know how to read at the level on which they write.”

But why do you ask me to believe you’re unable to do this? I’m not going to disrespect you like that. I know you don’t think people with learning disabilities and people who grew up in abusive backgrounds are capable of developing their media literacy skills, personal moral compass, and reading comprehension, but I don’t have any such contempt for them. Believe it or not, I actually don’t think I’m superior to those people, morally or in any other way. I believe they’re fully capable of everything I’m capable of. 

You should be able to form your own opinions and think critically about media. If you aren’t able to do that, you should learn, and I know you can. You might believe that people are simply too stupid to ride the bike without the training wheels, but I don’t, so don’t put your hang-ups on me. Unlearn that shit. 

[thefanficmonster]

Corpse Infested

Corpse Husband & Reader (Gender Neutral)

Warnings: Mentions of dysfunctional family, Family problems, Swearing

Genre: Humor, Comfort, Platonic fluff, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: When your friend disappears for a long time, seemingly having lost interest in what fueled the most passionate fire in their life, you cannot not worry about them. Even if you wanna give them space, you will reach out, you will offer your help. You will tell them they always have you to rely on and talk to.

Requested by Anon. Hi dear! I’m really sorry it’s taken me so long to complete and post your request, but here it finally is! Hope you come across it and if you do I hope you enjoy the read! Love, Vy ❤

For me, it’s never hard to find things to do. I’ve constantly got things on my mind and tasks to tend to, keeping me occupied and my mind focused at all times. I think that comes with living in a home as dysfunctional as this one. I honestly can’t recall a time when my parents got along nor can I think of a time where there was at least one second of peace while the two are both present in the house. It’s always a warzone up there. I’m saying up there because I tend to live out of the basement of their home. I know living in your parents’ basement is considered a peak loser point, or the bottom of the bottom, but you’d have to believe me when I say - I wasn’t always like this. In fact, I only recently came back to this hell-hole and boy do I regret it. I mean, it was a decision forced upon me by circumstances. Trust me, I tried every other option there was. When my dorm was to be closed down and demolished, we were given a notice to start planning our next move about a month early. You can bet I immediately started looking at places but my very tragic and miserable budget didn’t allow such a purchase. No rent was adequate for me and my near-empty wallet so my second option was moving in with my best friend who was also not in the greatest of situations but I thought I’d give that a shot too.

Spoiler alert: it didn’t work out. She lived in a tiny apartment with her boyfriend and his best friend at the time, so four people in one apartment was a nightmare. Still a lesser nightmare than this one but a nightmare nonetheless. Some unwanted and downright traumatizing events chased me out of that place after barely managing to pack my stuff. Therefore, finding myself on the streets again, I had no other option other than the obvious and least liked one: moving back in with my parents.

Making money during my first year of college hasn’t been easy. Working two jobs at once and also streaming video games on the side was what my time was filled with all throughout the first semester but then this damn pandemic started and now ruined everything for me. I had things going for me, I was slowly getting my life together and now it has all fallen apart yet again. The places I worked at closed down due to quarantine and I haven’t been able to steam, not only cause I’d be the victim of my parents’ comments but also cause my terrible home life would be exposed to all my fans and viewers. It’s not like I could cancel out the commotion going on right above my head, it’s a livestream and this house’s walls are cardboard thin meaning all the arguing I hear almost 24/7 will serve as background noise for my streams.

I haven’t reached out to my friends or fans to inform them of this which I feel slightly guilty about but I’m really not looking forward to having to lie to them, just as much as I’m not looking forward to having to tell them the truth so instead I’ve picked silence which is probably either worrying them or driving them insane. Either way, I’ll make my comeback soon.

Well....not very soon by the looks of it...

I have to gather the money, then I have to find a place, then comes the packing, moving out of here, moving into the new place...oh God, there’s so much to it that I don’t even wanna think about. Just that thought that I’ll be inactive for that long makes my stomach turn. Streaming’s where I’ve been channeling all my negative emotions, turning them into something positive and entertaining with the help of my friends.

Speaking of my friends, I should probably put emphasis on how amazing they are. Basically the older siblings I’ve always wished I had. I’m the baby of the group, the eighteen year old freshman in college, powering through life the best they can cause they are constantly getting tripped up by inconvenient occurrences such as this one for example. I tend to have the gang poke fun at me quite frequently - all lighthearted and with good intentions obviously - but they are also the ones to get super defensive if anyone gets the balls to talk shit about me. They’d never allow me to be the victim of any smack talk or online rumors and ‘cancel culture’ or whatever the hell people will come up with to leave others restless and wondering if they did something shady a decade ago. Well, to be fair, I didn’t even know about the concept of social media a decade ago and I’ve never been one to post much but I still have a protection squad in case anyone decides to come after me.

Little do they know the people I need protecting from are the very people that are supposed to protect me - my parents. Luckily, they don’t venture into to basement very often if at all and I have my own exit to the outside world so I don’t have to run into them unless I absolutely have to. The only time I emerge to the surface of the house - aka the ground floor - I do so to leave my share of rent money on the dining table and I usually do it when they aren’t home or when they’re asleep - that happens often with how many bottles they each knock back on the daily.

*sigh*...at least I don’t have to talk to them, right?

Anyhow, remember how I mentioned I always have things to do? Well, right now I’ve tasked myself with rifling through the large boxes containing random stuff I found in one of the basements down here to see if there’s anything I could possibly sell online. For starters, I’d like to hope there aren’t any severed body parts in here because this was one shady-ass basement before I moved in and un-creeped it a bit so I wouldn’t have to become an insomniac due to the paranoia of there being a homeless person down here with me or some paranormal entity. Regardless, old basements tend to be, apart from haunted, also filled with junk no one would find valuable despite it actually being worth something after all. That’s basically what I’m hoping to find at the moment.

As I dig through the contents of the first box, the YouTube playlist I have put on on my phone cuts off causing me to furrow my brows in confusion for a second before my ringtone pierces the silence the lack of music created.

I quickly mute the ringing and take a look at the Caller ID to see a name I never thought would pop up on my screen as an incoming call - Corpse. I, as well as many of our friends, know that he’s not the biggest fan of talking to people on the phone so this is rather surprising. Still, I pick up the call in case it’s not a mistake and an odd chance that it’s somethin urgent cause Lord knows Corpse doesn’t call people willy-nilly. 

Thank God it’s quiet up there at the moment.

“Hello?“ I try my best to cover up the confusion in my voice but I can only assume I didn’t do the best job considering Corpse replies with a slightly awkward chuckle.

“Surprised you, didn’t I?“ He asks, getting my cheeks to redden a bit, “You can’t blame a guy for calling after up and disappearing on him and on the whole internet. Where’ve you been?“

I open my mouth to respond when I hear the sound of glass breaking a shouted curse from upstairs.

Oh for fuck’s sake!

“Um...you know, places?“ I’m aware the answer isn’t only nonsensical but also sounds more like a question, but I can hardly focus on that right now. I’m too buys praying to an entity I don’t fully believe in for the situation above to not escalate.

“Uh, is everything ok over there? Where even are you right now?“ The teasing tone to his voice is all but gone at this point, replaced with deep concern, having obviously heard the commotion that did the exact opposite of what I prayed for - escalated.

“Y-yeah, it’s ok. It’s just another Thursday, you know.“ I attempt a small laugh but it’s blatantly miserable, “I moved back in with my parents when they announced the quarantine so that’s where I’m at now. They’re not the quietest of folks as you can tell so...“

“I FUCKING HATE YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT! I HOPE YOU DIE“

Oh crap, here we go.

“...So I can’t really stream a lot...or at all.“ I mutter, cringing with all my might, “But it’s only temporary! I’ll get back in the saddle as soon as I find another place to stay.“ I don’t dare mention how long that’s gonna take me, it’ll be too disappointing and depressing for the both of us. “So yeah...um...thanks for showing concern but there’s really nothing to worry about. I’m ok, everything’s ok, things are just...a bit off the rails, but I’ll fix em no problem. Like I always do!“ I attempt to sound as cheerful as possible with little success due to the overwhelming anger I feel towards those people upstairs and the gut-wrenching nostalgia for the world of streaming I can no longer be a part of because of them. Actually, I put the blame first on the pandemic and second on my parents - if it wasn’t for Covid I’d probably still be in my dorm!

“Hey...um, I think I know an affordable place where you can take up residence. Only if you want to, of course.“ He sounds hesitant but I easily overlook that as excitement bursts throughout my entire being at the sound if an escape being offered to me just like that. Had I known I’d find the solution to my problem in the very people I spent time avoiding because I was afraid of their pity, sympathy and judgement.

“Oh please, it could be a rat and roach infested shoe box and I’d go running to it. How much is rent?“ I ask through a gasp of hurried laughter that’s a result of my inability to contain said excitement. Listen, I’ve been sitting here in Hellsburg for three months now and haven’t gotten a proper shuteye during that whole period, whatever Corpse is offering has to be better than this misery.

“Rent can be discussed once you move in...“ He trails off, “And it’s not rat nor roach infested but there’s a slight issue...“

“Which is?“ I’m honestly expecting the worst: in a bad neighborhood; faulty wiring with a high chance of being electrocuted; faulty piping with a high chance of flooding; people have died there; things get randomly moved around in the middle of the night etc. However, I don’t voice any of them to avoid getting laughed at for my wild imagination.

“Well, uh, it’s corpse infested.“ He says a little awkwardly, causing me to let out an inaudible sigh.

So my ‘people have died there’ guess was on point, huh?

“People have died there, huh? Well, I can turn a blind eye to that as long as I don’t find their bodies in the closet or meet their spirits at 3AM.“ I attempt to joke, now second-guessing my eagerness to accept the offer.

Corpse bursts out laughing his ass off at my statement, getting me to furrow my eyebrows in confusion and wonder what I said was so funny - it was a poor attempt at a joke, it in no way deserves that sort of reaction, barely a chuckle in my opinion.

“You’re golden, Y/N, I swear.“ He says once he forces the laughter to subside, “I meant corpse infested as in Corpse Husband infested.“ He breaks out in another fit as my brain slowly starts connecting the dots.

Oooohh he’s asking me to go live with him

“Wait. Wait, wait, wait, hold up for a sec. Are you aware of what you’re offering me? I mean, we’ve never met IRL, you barely know me and....and for all you know I could be the serial killer in this situation!“ I have no idea why I’m pushing my luck, don’t ask. I just don’t want him to make a decision he’ll later regret, I guess. “Like, I could kill you in your sleep!“

“Would you?“ He asks confidently, silently stating he already knows the answer.

I roll my eyes, “Of course not! But...” He cuts me off.

“Great, the offer stands on my end. I’m not a noisy nor nosey roommate so I suggest you start packing. If you choose to live in that hell-hole over living with me, I’m sorry but I’ll be hella offended, just so you know.“

Corpse sounds like he’s about to hang up on me, a decision already made, so I hurry to stop him. “Wait! What about rent?”

“Fuck the rent, pack your bags.“ And just like that, despite my efforts, he hangs up on me.

Well...this is a chance of a lifetime that I know refusing would lead me to not only remain stuck here but also put me in the hugest loser bin. There’s also the fear of being Corpse’s burden which I’ll try my best not to be - I mean, I’m a super independent person and Lord knows that if this offer came any other time or from any other person, I would’ve declined asap, no discussion.

But streaming

But sleeping properly

But having a normal life again

Yeah those are most certainly the reasons I get up and go into the closet in search on my emptied suitcase. Time to fill it up again, I guess. This time with a smile on my face and excitement fueling each and every movement of mine.

@maat-the-prescriptive  @simonsbluee  @save-the-sky  @itsminniekat  @hacker-ghost  @bi-andready-tocry  @imtiredaffff  @jazzkaurtheglorious  @hereforbeebo  @fandomgirl17  @chrysanthykios  @maehemscorpyus  @loraleiix  @letsloveimagines  @annshit  @i-cant-choose-a-username-help  @enigmaticmaze  @divine-artemis  @waterlilypat  @idontknowwhatthisisfam  @evi-ka  @classyandfabulous00  @redperson58  @lilysdaydreams @solowheein  @mythicalamphitrite  @axen-gers  @luckygirl144  @nj01  @buddyemily   @the-albino-lioness  @stardream14  @gdhdkfnn  @nomadicgypsyy  @preciousskye  @fluffysuicideunicornsworld  @o-kaelin  @manacharlotte  @awkward-youtube-trash  @lolalee24  @bonky-beerns  @meme-lord-and-savior-sebastian  @strawbrinkofdeath  @teenloves  @tams0527  @browneyespinkhair  @starstruckllamapuppy  @daisychains012  @y0ulooked  @tinytacosuitcaseflap @supernatural-is-my-only-life  @jula-pauline  @melodykitty  @just-that-bi-girl  @crazybutconfidentaf  @lowellshade @alphakees  @bellero  @weallneednamjesus  @starryhanji  @boiled-onionrings  @husherstan  @fockingwhore  @melaningoddessthings  @prettypastelpetals  @haleypearce  @godwhyamiawkward  @y-napotat  @daisychainyoonmin  @little-miss-rebel3  @free-wheelin-bi-sexual  @redmoon261 @darkacademic2  @wiseflamingoqueen  @into-the-end  @namikhai-i  @nastiablr  @thelittleplantlover  @mirktuan  @dont-hyuck @jjk-bunny  @vintagegothlover  @easygoingtheatre  @itsrandombooklover  @miiaivi  @emmybaybee  @befourgolden  @jjk-is-my-shit  @eternalteaaars  @spacebadgerx  @princesslunalight  @acequinn14  @samm48  @misselsbells06 @simp-lykawa  @fo-love  @marishimomura-blog  @therealglenncoco  @cinnamonbun332  @killtherandomness  @sanshinexxxsan  @fee-btheweeb  @press-lay  @cathleenpotgieter16  @jazzydoesstuff  @moonlxghtbay  @forestrain2000  @hyunjinhugs  @blood-of-fandoms  @lovellylies  @ukiyolixx  @simpforhpcharacters  @chrisdylan17  @parkerjisung  @pedernille  @theodonyous  @wineandionysus  @malfoystilinskii05  @morbid-x  @coryisagee  @jessewa26  @scoobydooluver97 @mindintheskies365  @raeanneinwonderland  @indecisive-empanada  @gluttonypalace  @loriane2503  @btsiguess-kpop  @khaoticbunny  @lucidlycactus  @smiithys  @rottenroyalebooks  @kpopgirlbtssvt  @fangirl-tc27  @fr0z3n-1  @notmesimpingfortechno  @shotarosleftpinky  @kunoi-chan  @idk-whats-wrong-with-me  @yikeroonie  @goldenstarofthunderclan  @poetry-and-tea  @ama-do-writing-stuff  @wishbonewolf  @emeraldxhope  @t0xick1tty  @kusuinko  @speakyourselfloveyourself  @sophia902103  @lo-manburg  @classsykittykat  @dmgama  @depressedpuppythatneedscoffee  @btsiguess-kpop  @akaashi-baby  @gun-jong-simp  @geschichtenfee  @yerapotato-wp  @browneyedgirl365  @thysagclub  @sparklycloudnight  @helloatomicshadow  @queentorresstuff @vtte @val-gal  @lucy-bunny17  @aaliyahh0  @katluckybear  @boyleanti  @straybids  @franchesca-791  @cosmicstorm19  @averyisbackinthetrashcan  @aomi-nabi  @xlanawriter  @allensimpsforcorpse

[emisonme]

This will be big but i felt like sharing my thoughs. I love camila, so so much…but I feel like sometimes people are praising her too much. Camila loves fame, no matter how many of you deny it, it’s pretty obvious that she does. I’ve seen plenty of arguments on twitter regarding the 4H vs C topic and I can’t help but notice some people saying stuff like “camila didn’t choose to be in this position”, “all the girls treated her like shit when it wasn’t even up to her decide”. Well obviously I know the feud between the 5H girls was fake, but it really messes with me that people still continue to paint camila as the victim. Even tho camila may have not betrayed the other girls as they tried to make it seem, she sure as hell accepted this full of privileges position she was given since the beginning. And I’m not saying this is a bad thing, because honestly which one of us would deny such opportunity, if we were in her place? But most of us and I’m also talking about me, tend to forget that camila is also a person who has negative traits, not only positives. Unfortunately one of her biggest negatives, is that she grew to love the spotlight. And if you really think about it, it makes sense since she was always so shy around people and when she got a taste of the “pop star” life, she felt mesmerised by it. From my point of view, as soon as she got that taste she also started craving the “bigger” things. Big arena concerts, awards, people loving her. For example lauren might love her job as an artist, but she undeniably hates the fame that comes with it. She’s just in it because she truly wants to share a piece of her soul and justify the definition of a true artist. And I’m not saying that mila is not, she sure as hell wants to create art. But if you ask me, the difference between these two is that lauren would be completely content with singing in a room full of people who simply appreciate her art, whilst camila would prefer to be in an arena full of people who sing her songs and scream her name. Not that laure wouldn’t like that, but I think you get the point. And I don’t know if anyone noticed, but until a few years ago well actually before the pandemic started, her management continued to push down the image of this “goofy innocent” girl who was happy all the time. She also pushed it herself because that was her job! No matter how much we think we know her,camila is still a pop star in the music industry who plays a part, just like everyone else who works in that damned department. And based on the above I’d like to point out that (no matter how many of you disagree with this) nobody is forcing camila to stay in the closet. Yes I know I sound ridiculous but hear me out. There isn’t a single contract which can legally force someone to hide their sexuality. Yes her management may have warned her not to come out in fear of losing profits and even blackmailed her, but at the end of the day it’s her choice. If she desperately wanted to come out as we all make it seem, she would’ve done it by now. The fact that she doesn’t, should tell us, that afterall she does care about her image. Even if that’s taking a toll on her now, it was her decision to follow that path. It was her decision to stay in the closet, it was her decision to accept the pr with shawn and it was her decision to keep playing the “happy” girlfriend to the media. No matter how much she was manipulated by this hell hole, camila is a pretty clever person. If she didn’t want any of this and simply wanted to be authentic to herself and the rest of the world, she simply wouldn’t care if she lost the title of the pop princess. But she does care. And it’s completely normal at this point, cause in this industry either you lose yourself or you come out stronger. Unfortunately I believe that camila’s case belongs to the first occasion. I don’t think that present camila we see in interviews or shows or whatever is the real camila. That camila is long gone. Anyway sorry if this was exhausting and thanks to anyone who read it all,cause I really wanted to share this with someone

someone

Good Lord, Anon, that's a lot to unpack. I will start by saying, I agree with some, and disagree with some of what you had to say. Now, where to start...

You say it still messes with you, that everyone still portrays Camila as the victim. Are you going to deny that Camila WAS/IS victimized? The truth is, they were ALL victimized. They are ALL victims of an abusive Industry.

You said, "she sure as hell accepted this full of privileges position she was given since the beginning." You are either forgetting, or just plain don't care, that Fifth Harmony was a highly controlled entity. There was no choosing, or "accepting" privileges. They each did what they were told to do, said what they were told to say, and acted the way they were told to act. They were each given a role to play, and they were contractually obligated to play that role.

Yes, they were contractually obligated to act a certain way. There has been ample proof given, that none of the girls had any control over their PUBLIC image. Camila still has no control over her PUBLIC image, because there has been ample proof, she is still operating under her original contract.

Did Camila choose to sign that original contract? Yes, she did. Did she read that original contract? According to Lauren, probably not. None of them did. Did Camila agree to sign her solo contract? Yes, she did. But as I've explained before, if she wanted to continue in the music industry, she had no choice but to sign the solo contract they offered her. That solo contract is still connected to her original contract.

Camila is a human being. We ALL have positive and negative traits. Camila, all the ladies of 5H, you and me, we all have our positives and negatives. None of us are perfect.

You said, "one of her biggest negatives, is that she grew to love the spotlight." Why is that a negative? Hell, they ALL wanted the spotlight. Every person who gets into the Entertainment Industry, wants to get themselves in the spotlight. They all want to succeed in the field of their choice. To succeed, they have to garner the attention, and live in the "spotlight", in one way, or another.

Every one of them auditioned on a NATIONALLY TELEVISED talent show. They wouldn't have done that, if they didn't want to be noticed, and hopefully thrust into the spotlight of success. They ALL wanted that spotlight of success to be as solo artists. It's didn't quite work out that way. But, they ALL chose to try and achieve that spotlight as a group.

If one has been paying attention, from the beginning, Camila made no bones about her desired dream. She has stated from the beginning, she wanted to be a "pop star". Of course she wanted the spotlight. Lauren has said, from the beginning, she wanted to be "famous and travel the world". She wanted to be a famous star, in the spotlight.

Since you have chosen to compare Camila and Lauren, I'll answer to them. You seem to think there is this big chasm between the two. There really isn't. The only difference is the outcome, thus far. Lauren STILL wants the spotlight and fame, she just wants it on her terms. The problem is, it's damn near impossible to get that success on ones own terms, in an Industry that insists on dictating the terms.

That's a more recent decision on Lauren's part, by the way. You seem to be conveniently forgetting, that until 2019, Lauren also "chose" to play the game on THEIR terms. It was most likely, a two year PR contract, with a drug addicted gang-banger that turned her off of THE GAME. Lauren was pissed, that after all that, her debut album got shelved in 2019. I DON'T BLAME HER!!! I'm sure that also contributed to her decision, that THEIR TERMS suck ass.

Does Camila "crave" the big concerts, accolades, and people loving her? Yes, she does. They ALL do, or they wouldn't have signed solo contracts after putting 5H on hiatus. Instead, they would have said "this Industry sucks" and walked away. They didn't. They ALL craved more.

Lauren wants the same thing Camila has, just on her terms. Lauren doesn't "hate fame". She hates the negative side of fame. She hates having her life dictated by terms and schedules. She hates being told what to say, and how to act. She hates that fans get all up in her business.

She loves the nicer side of fame. She wants to see a lot of people come and see her perform. She loves to be on stage and see her fans singing and dancing to her music. She appreciates the accolades. She loves the love she gets from her fans. She would love even more, if her fans would multiply, and buy and stream the hell out of her music, instead of always bitching, telling her who she is, and how she should be, and getting all up in her damn business.

All one has to do, is listen to Lauren and the anger inside her about all this mess. She wants more. She wants more than a fucking "room full of people" enjoying her art. She wants a stadium full of people enjoying her art. WHO THE FUCK WOULDN'T. She just wants that stadium full of people to enjoy her art, and not expect more than that from her. I'm sure Camila would appreciate the same damn thing.

Unfortunately, that's simply not how the music industry is set up, these days. The difference is, Camila has accepted the fact, that she IS the product. Lauren has not. Lauren don't want to be a product. She wants her music/art to be the product.

I've said it a million times, the music industry hardly sells music, anymore. The music Industry sells the artist. The music has become a bi-product of the Artist. The Industry knows which artists will sell, and which ones won't. They know what image will sell, and which ones won't. Be the artist THEY want you to be, THEY'LL make you a star, and maybe even famous. If not, good luck.

Finally, you are completely right. There isn't a contract out there, that says someone can't come out of the closet. That would be blatant discrimination, and wouldn't pass the muster of the legal system. But, when you sign away control of your own image in a contract, that gives the contract holder the rights to dictate what your PUBLIC image will be. If they want you to have a straight PUBLIC image, then you'll have a straight PUBLIC image. If THEY want you to have a "good girl next door" image, then that's the PUBLIC image you'll have. You signed away your rights to be your authentic self, when you signed away the rights to control how others see you, period!!!

IN MY OPINION, Camila has come out of the closet so damn many times, I can't even count any more. She just has to do so, in a way that isn't obvious to those who have control over how others see her. Take her last video, for instance. When one listens to terms she chooses to use, and does a bit of research, you'll discover, what I believe is the hidden meaning behind that video. If I'm correct in MY THINKING, she has yet again, screamed her truth from the rooftops, for those who choose to listen, and understand.

As for the PR contracts...I was the first person to say, Camila made the choice to sign into those particular contracts. When one signs away control over their own public image, it also allows those in control to dictate that one MUST enter into PR contracts to help THEM present the PUBLIC image THEY want for that particular artist. The artist gets a say in which person that PR is with, simply because they HAVE to agree to sign the contract with that particular person.

So, did Camila agree to sign into this PR contract with the human hair ball? She absolutely did....And NO ONE should be surprised by it. It is quite clear that this shit has been in the making, since June/July of 2015. Hell, after that shit show with the British Bore, even the majority of the fandom was asking for it. The timing was right, and here we are.

Lastly, Camila is always stepping out of the closet, like I said above. IN MY OPINION, she wants her fans to know who she truly is, but that doesn't mean she wants to tell the world in definitive terms. Like Lauren, she wishes people could simply appreciate the music, and leave per private life out of it, but she also knows that's a pipe dream, and not reality.

She knows, the second she decides to speak her truth aloud, her career takes, yet another, blow. I also think, that's one of the reasons THEY, through the media, make sure her ignorant youth is continuously brought up. The more she has to fight to get through that hardship, the more she will want to keep her truth a secret. (yes, a definite manipulation tactic)

Camila could decide to say, fuck it all, and come out with her truth at any time, after her contract is up. She could also decide never to PUBLICLY come out. It's her choice, unless people in power decide to take that choice away from her.

Whitney Houston took her truth with her to the grave. Taylor lives with her truth, one foot in the closet, and one foot out. That's basically what Camila is doing now. IN MY OPINION. Her public foot is in the closet, and her music/art foot is out. If people cared more about the music/art, they would get the authentic truth. If you care more about her public image, you'll get exactly what THEY want her to be.

People try to tell you, and others this all the damn time. Take the recent interviews. If you notice, Camila, and others are always saying how vulnerable, honest, and authentic she is, IN HER ART. Her truth is in her craft, whether acting or music. Her PUBLIC image, is just that, an image to sell to the PUBLIC. Everyone in the Entertainment Industry has one...Even Lauren. Yes, she did play the game. She still has her toe in the game, she just isn't playing it at a high level, right now...and, unfortunately for her, it shows!!!

There! I answered your book with a damn novel. As always, I could be wrong with my opinions, but they are my opinions!!!!!! !! !!!!

[princessofgayskull]

Hi sunflower, what's your thoughts on T Swift's Betty being a catradora song???

Me, taking a break from spop to focus on my mental health and setting better boundaries:

Me, reading this ask:

This ask woke me up from like a deep, sleeping beauty type slumber, not joking. I don’t get asked to talk about Taylor Swift often, despite being a fan of hers since I was nine years old (I’m 22 now *wink*) and we are about to find out why. But I pride myself on taking any fiction piece of media I interact with and connecting it somehow to Taylor Swift. I can do so to varying degrees of success (usually depends on the ships and romance of the world) but there are so many songs of Taylor’s that have just fit Catradora so well for me, both in and out of canon. 

Some of my favorite examples: out of the woods (AND IT KEPT ME UP AT NIGHT WHEN NOELLE SAID THIS WAS HER TAYLOR SWIFT SONG FOR CATRADORA LIKE GAH CASUAL TS LISTENERS WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND) bad blood, lwymd, don’t blame, dancing with our hands tied, the archer, breathe, you’re not sorry, the way I loved you, forever & always, should’ve said no, safe & sound- I could go on.

But I won’t because I wanna stay on topic and talk about betty. Now I have a number of songs from the folklore/evermore series that are for me catradora songs (we’ll get to that in a minute) but this one is… challenging. Because I could be like “yes, because [insert casual reason here]” or “no, because [insert casual reason here]” but I can’t because Taylor feeds her children well and there’s several aspects of this song I feel like should be considered.

This biggest one to be considered, for me, is the love triangle aspect. Folklore features at length the betty/james/Augustine love triangle, each of them having one main song on the album from their POV. Betty's is cardigan, augustine’s is august, and james’ is betty. (also I’m going to throw out the gender component for a second; I know taylor says that Betty is about a guy’s apology and I totally vibe with her reasons why she wanted to write a song about a boy apologizing BECAUSE HOW GREAT WOULD THAT BE?) The love triangle makes the application of Catradora iffy at best. Because it’s like, who would be who? I am going to go out on a limb and assume that you’re seeing Catra as James? I think that personality wise, Adora as Betty and Catra as James is not a stone’s throw away from fitting actually really well. Adora’s canon journey is one of coming to realize “I know what I want and I know that it’s okay to want it” and a big part of Catra’s arc is her being like “Well shit… there goes my plans. Kind of feeling like a dumbass rn” especially in s4/s5. 

(That s4/s5 distinction is important; I’ll show why in a second) 

But for me, there’s no augustine. Or one that’s obvious anyway. I never imagined that either Catra or Adora dated or even had any inclinations with anyone else during the five season run- that’s just my personal opinion, people are completely welcome to feel free to disagree. I don’t think Catra acted even out of distraction with Scorpia or DT, and I think Adora was so focused on being She Ra that when she wasn’t thinking about failing/abandoning Catra when she alloted time to do so, she was thinking about the crushing weight of her responsibilities. So you know, not that much time to get back out there. So I rule out what causes James to apologize in the first place- cheating.

Side note about James cheating- I’m pretty sure Taylor confirmed this, in the long pond studio sessions doc, when she’s telling Jack Antonoff (MY BOY JACK) and Aaron Dessner ( GRAMMY AWARD WINNING KING) that James “was a fool!” And James did sleep with Augustine as confirmed in august, but cardigan makes it seem like he was definitely dating Betty before the summer. Maybe Taylor took inspiration from friends and they “were on break.” I also believe that the kiss in the Heart is the first kiss, that Catra and Adora were never ‘together’ together before Adora found the sword and defected (again, that’s just an opinion, but Adora just looks so wonderfully gobsmacked), so…

We can rule out cheating, and I think we can accomplish this and still reserve the essential meaning of the song of “I did something wrong, I see that now, I apologize for doing it, and I still love you” by widening the lens of what the “did something wrong” was (or “did something bad” you know *wink*). In that wider lens really you could fit either Catra or Adora into the song, but I’m still going to assume Catra is the James in this scenario based on how much of her redemption arc is formed around her refusal to say sorry and then eventually doing so. Of course there is no standing your porchlight but rather standing while wrestling a bunch of murderous clones…. Hmm….

But there are some stupid friends! I wholeheartedly believe Catra is James because of the dissing of Betty’s friends. That’s what Catra does to Bow, Glimmer and the rebellion et al., for most of the show and by the end of s4 she has no friends for Adora to even mock (terrible and cruel of me, I know, but it’s true). Also I know people are like “he called her friends stupid and then expected betty to take him back?” but I scream sing the line “WILL YOU KISS ME ON THE PORCH IN FRONT OF ALL YOUR STUPID FRIENDS?” every time. It brings me serotonin. 

Along those lines we can ask “Who’s Inez?” in this situation. When I think gossip no one from the show really comes to mind, well, expect for Double Trouble. But Double Trouble doesn’t ever speak to Adora about Catra. This happens vice-versa, and in Betty, James reveals that Inez told Betty he cheated on her. 

I want to say something controversial… Glimmer comes to mind when I think “who’s the Inez?” And this is based off of two things: 1) Inez’s closeness to Betty, and 2) Inez drags James out to dry, rightfully so. And when I think of that I think of Glimmer screaming “Do one good thing in your life!” directly in Catra’s face. James gives Inez a bad wrap in Betty. Not cool James. 

Of course there’s the pivotal, “would you tell me to go fuck myself?/ or lead me to the garden?” To me this a fun way of showing there’s vulnerability to what James is doing, so automatically I’m led to is the scene where Catra asks Adora to stay, or each time in s5 when Catra risks, basically an identity crisis to let Adora in how she really feels, but there’s always the potential that Adora could spurn her by not returning her feelings or rejecting her outright. 

I think the best argument that can be made for “is betty a catradora song” can really be encapsulated by the lyric(s): “the worst thing that I ever did is what I did to you” and “the only thing I wanna do is make it up to you.” That is what about the song SCREAMS Catra to me. And yeah, it could be argued that Adora hurt Catra pretty brutally (Shadow Weaver makes that point EVEN THOUGH SHE HAD NO RIGHT TO) that she messed up by abandoning Catra- but Adora feels guilt for... literally breathing. Adora is the quintessential embodiment of “pick your battles, no that’s too many battles, put some back,” but Catra picked one battle first and foremost (yes, she had a few others but this was the one) and that was Adora. Everything that motivated her was surrounded around a narrative of surpassing Adora for a multitude of reasons, and because of that she pretty much hurts Adora every chance she gets after Promise. Adora is really Catra’s first casualty, it makes sense that she has to be her first apology. And I think that after being vibed checked back to back by DT and Glimmer and realizing “oh hey fuck, I’m still in love with her” and then almost dying just to not die because Adora saves her, I think much of Catra’s motivation shifts to “how to do I get Adora to want to stay?” 

That’s my logic for how Betty could be a catradora song in canon. Now not all of my Taylor associations are with canon catradora, many of them do belong to uws catradora, because it’s a lot easier to apply the more modern details of Taylor’s songs to a modern au. The song Breathe is big that way. (it’s in Upper West Side, it’s the song Adora listens to and cries to after that first ride, I just never mentioned that it was taylor because my conditioned reaction to bringing up taylor is to have my head bit off with someone’s semi incorrect and slightly sexist opinion that I never, ever ask for) And this ask got me thinking about what it would look like if I applied not Catradora to Betty, but Betty to Catradora. What would it look like if Catra skateboarded and wore black lipstick, Adora wore a cardigan and they had homeroom together until Catra really messed up? What would it look like if they were seventeen when they admitted their feelings for each other instead of 21? What would it look like if they spent a summer fighting but dreaming of each other? What would their love story look like if Catra and Adora were in that town where Taylor envisioned this “same event that affected three people in different ways?”

I think it’d look something like this. 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31141973/chapters/76952048

what do you guys think?

quick but INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT thank you to @gimme-tea-bitch for helping me with this, being my beta, and listening to me talk about folklore/evermore.

[curryaboo]

— hiii! i was tagged by @banglatown @bengayli @jentlemahae @chameli aaand @/minteas to do this “get to know me better/20 questions” tag!! thank u so much beauts!! <3<3<3<3<3

🪁 what do you prefer to be called name-wise?

rao is absolutely fine!! <33

🪁 when is your birthday?

oct 13 :) i share it with some,, prominent people in popular culture and politics which aren’t rlly MY personal faves but wtvr it just goes to prove i’m the superior oct 13 baby !

🪁 where do you live?

the uk :<

🪁 three things you’re doing right now?

answering these questions, sorting out some spotify playlists in between answering these questions & casting my eyes between lines of james acaster’s classic scrapes and my phone (sunny @/amarakaran mentioned the book on one of her tag games n very kindly gave me the link to it and i jumped str8 to reading it! u know you’ve watched too many things featuring james acaster when u now read his book in his exact voice :/)

🪁 four fandoms that have piqued your interest right now?

bbc ghosts (ppl have some amazing theories n opinions surrounding it but i would not advise looking up the tag on here and sorting thru recent god bless youse but there are some awful takes there) aaand idk ig a range of kpop groups but i don’t rlly participate in the fandom sides of things anymore (and i’m not consuming a lot of new media or at least keeping up to date with the media that i do to label myself as being interested in being part of the fandom)

🪁 how is the pandemic treating you?

icl now that i’m seeing it in retrospect, it’s been cruel in the sense that it’s taken a lot of important things away from me (my last two years of high school for example i’m rlly bummed abt that) & stunted me in some ways but regardless i’ve learnt a lot about myself and my friends & family and yeah i’ve learnt to cherish myself and my loved ones all the same :)

🪁 song you can’t stop listening to right now?

boy am i glad this question is here bc since yesterday ? maybe i’ve been listening to gal mitthi mitthi endlesslyyy i think my brain chemicals recognise that we haven’t been to a wedding for the past 2 summers so it tries to fill the void by fixating on this one wedding-y song 💔💔

🪁 recommend a movie

PLS if u haven’t already , pls watch assassination nation bc i need someone to begrudgingly revel with in the absolute shit show pisstake of a movie that this is . (as a side note: my soul will not know peace until kennie jd does a video on it) on a more serious side, english vinglish is one of my most favourite films 10000/10 recommend pls go see it if u haven’t it’s an absolute warm hug of a movie <3

🪁 how old are you?

18 :)

🪁 school, university, occupation, other?

gap year babieee my soul is just wondering the place rn

🪁 do you prefer hot or cold?

cold !!

🪁 name one fact others may not know about you.

uhmm i lived in bangladesh for about 9-10 months when i was abt 4 and it was so amazing i miss it very much :’]

🪁 are you shy?

yes quite shy :} but i will always put effort into getting to know someone or initiating a convo !!

🪁 do you have any preferred pronouns?

i was in turmoil over them rlly but she/they is what i’m comfy with rn ! :D

🪁 any pet peeves?

other than some obvious ones, when ppl open things like crisps packets upside down,, that disgusts me truly

🪁 what’s your favourite “dere” type?

i would be a liar if i said i wasn’t biased towards a good bakadere but not too much that it annoys me lmao

🪁 rate your life 1-10. 1 being really crappy and 10 being the best you could ever be.

hmm rn it’s maybe a 5?? i’m grateful for so many things but there is def a lot of room for improvement :] (actually i just got on a 3 month free trial for spotify today so that just bumped the 5 up to a 6 😌)

🪁 what’s your main blog?

this one right here jaanoo.tumblr.com !!

🪁 list your side blogs and what they’re used for.

i don’t have any but i’ve been thinking of making one for aesthetics or like future references ??

🪁 is there anything you think people need to know about you before becoming friends with you?

uhmm again i am quite shy teehee™️ imo there’s a noticeable difference between when we were yk just friendly towards each other vs when we actually become friends and i’m more comfortable with u . that’s not to say that i was being fake in the earlier instances of u knowing me, i was just a lot more reserved :) i’m also one of those *is online 24/7 but gets virtual interaction burnout every 2 hours so postpones replying to ur message to 3 days later* which sucks skfjdsj but yeah if there was anything that i’d need to know about YOU it’d be if u had any dietary requirements bc i love baking for my friends <333

ok now i’m gonna embarrass myself more than i already have & tag a lot of ppl bc i’m super nosey like that and want to know my mutuals’ answers to these 🥸 ofc u can absolutely ignore this and not want to do it we’re not under any contractual binding here <33 @allenoraaa @okhag @watermlon @gayanese @letteredwingsmain @theropoda @holyself @txtzy @creatures2010 @junqhwans @mistblush @snsdyuri @waterz @derelicthousefootage @killuaology @staycverse @amarakaran @tendermachines @shahrukh-khan @peachysara @firesigns @postmoderncaricatures @horrormanga @iqraars @123dream @sunmisbf @avisachi @bengaligirlfriend @morksuns @czennie-on-top @markvibes @joppin @nyuly @shin-jiyoon @99lover @mithaai @chamelis @thefinalgirlz @nikolailantsovswifey @mehendi @yerification @oneustual @singinginthecar @yejiswife @lovedsoup @mangopickled and uhh tumblr’s not letting me annoy tag anymore ppl so if u wanna do this and ur not on the list (ur in my heart 💕 and in an ideal world where tumblr automatically tags all my mutuals 😑) u can say i tagged u if you’d like!! ^_^

[canonicallysoulmates]

J2′s Virtual Con Panel (March 7th, 2021)

Alright, let’s talk j2! As all of you probably know by now Jared and Jensen had a virtual con panel today (March 7th, 2021); it was the first j2 con panel of the year, and we started on a good note. I will be providing some time stamps, and as always I will be providing a link to the whole panel at the end of this post so y’all can watch it for yourself, I highly recommend doing so, it was a really good panel. 

Okay, let’s jump right into it!

- The panel started late, and the reason I am mentioning that is because I have to comment on how stressful that wait was with the grey screen saying ‘standby!’. I much rather preferred the countdown, it was less stressful 😅 

- Anyways, the panel starts off with some cute banter between the boys, they spend around 6mins just talking to each other, joking about Jensen’s hair, telling stories about each other. Honestly, answering questions was unnecessary because I would have happily seen a full hour of that, of just them talking. 

- Jensen said he missed Jared 🥺

- So...Jared addressed Jensen’s birthday and okay let’s talk about this. After Jensen says he missed Jared and that it’s been so long since they’ve seen each other, Jared fumbles on his way to comment about how he was gonna post for Jensen’s birthday. You can practically see his brain buffer cause I s2g that man was this close to saying he was with Jensen before his brain kicked in, and then he switched lanes to mention taking a trip with G for their anniversary. 

Of course I have an opinion about this, I don’t know if I’ll be able to express it coherently, but I shall try; it is so incredibly convenient he’d mention what has been a big talking point in fandom for the past couple of days. This is such a stupid thing to lie about, and it’s a lie that falls apart in seconds cause if you think about it shit don’t make sense. 

We know that Jared and G were on a trip, but we also know they were in Colorado. Thanks to D’s hairstylist, we know Jensen’s also in Colorado. 

So, I’m expected to believe that these two men who are incredibly close, who in this same panel mention how much they’ve missed each other, that Jared who says he didn’t post on his boy’s birthday (and yes he called Jensen his boy again 🥰) because he got all emotional thinking about how this was gonna be the first birthday in years he wasn’t gonna be by Jensen’s side and be able to give him a hug- I am expected to believe that Jared was in the same state and didn’t even make a pitstop by where Jensen’s at?! That they’d be in the same state and not even meet up?!  Not only that, Jared and G’s anniversary was on the 27th which fell on a Saturday, based on reports we know they took that trip from the 28th to the 1st, if this was an anniversary trip why not make it a weekend thing from Friday to Sunday? Why do it from Sunday to Monday which was a workday? And I’m also expected to believe that they went on an “anniversary trip” and little mrs. social media preferred to post an old ass pic and not post anything at all from said trip, even posting a pic as if she were in Austin on the 1st.  Bitch please, I love you but go to someone else with that tale cause I ain’t buying. 

- Continuing with the panel, the boys start answering questions and I’mma just tell y’all right now a lot of the questions in this panel are kinda shit. This is the first panel of the year, both these men have big projects going on and yet the first question is about parenting. Their answer is pretty much the same thing they always answer, that they can’t do it alone, that most of it is their wives, Jared says he helps with the kids in the morning and then goes to the guest house and leaves Gen to it, if you’ve heard once you’ve heard it a million times. 

- Next question is about dreams, and Jensen makes a joke about mushroom induced dreams that Jared finds so hilarious he has to duck out of frame. I don’t know if y’all have ever seen The Late Show with Stephen Colbert but Stephen’s wife is usually there when he’s filming and that woman laughs at even his stupidest jokes, if you see them interact they are that couple that is so obviously in love years into their marriage, they make each other laugh, and the reason why I am bringing this up in a j2 post is because that is the vibe that moment had! Actually, that’s the vibe a lot of this panel had; that mushroom joke was not that funny yet Jared reacted as if Jensen was the funniest man in the world.  And the j2 doesn’t stop there because when it’s Jared’s time to answer the question the boys say they’re in each other’s dreams. x 

- Jared said he sits in the Impala in his garage 🥺 Jensen said his Impala is safe and covered in a secure location in Austin, which I’m going to interpret as he left it with Jared.

- A fan asked if we would see director!Jensen make an appearance on Walker and Jared revealed he was supposed to! Jensen was slated to direct episode 5 of Walker but due to commitments to The Boys he sadly wasn’t able to but both boys say that it will happen and it’s something they’re looking forward to. So are we boys, so are we ❤

- When talking about how Jensen was supposed to direct episode 5 of Walker, Jensen commented that Jared was looking forward to having someone who knew him so well and could help him creatively on the set. Now, I will for no particular reason remind y’all that G works on the show. 

I love Jensen ☕ 

-  Moving on! Jensen talked about his production company. He said it is currently developing 5 different projects including one that they will be delivering to the network this week and that they have a project he’s excited about with an spn alumn. He said working on these projects and his company is what he’s been spending his time on in Colorado.

- Jensen put on a beanie and y’all are not ready for what happened. Not only did he look cute af, not only did Jared like how Jensen looked and compliment him but he called Jensen babe 😍 Now listen you don’t have to take my word for it, listen to the audio a couple times, form your own opinion about what you hear but I have listened to multiple versions of that clip with headphones multiples times at different volumes...and imo Jared calls Jensen babe, you can try to take that from me over my dead body. x  

- They were talking about a fight outtake they did on the finale in slow motion, and did an example and when I tell y’all those two somehow managed to do an in perfectly in sync slowmo fight virtually! 

- They showed their matching tattoos! 

- Jensen sends Jared shirtless selfies and gives him beard updates. I swear I am not making this up. 

- And in the line of things I swear I am not making up is that Jared grabbed the pic Jensen send him, and edited it to make it seem as if Jensen was singing the clean version of WAP, that is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen 😂

- Jensen said him and Jared like to watch the early season gag reels 🤗

- At one point Jensen tried to tell one of Jared’s jokes and not even three words in this man was already in tears laughing so hard, he says it’s something that makes him laugh every time he thinks about it, he could barely get through the joke and to be fair it is hilarious; the joke goes: Did you hear there was an explosion at a cheese factory in France? The brie was everywhere. That cracked me tf up and it left them in tears 😂

- Jensen called Jared a freaking ox 😂

- Jensen says that if the roles were reversed and Sam had died, Dean would have wasted away at the back of a pool hall 😭

- The panel ends with j2 saying I love you to each other 😭❤

It was a really good panel, I had missed these men so so so so much, they have brightened my spirits and I’ve been in a good mood since I watched it, they just make me so happy 🥰. If you haven’t seen it yet I highly recommend doing so, the boys were looking cute, it was funny, they kept making each other laugh and there was even heart eyes! Jared kept getting the cutest little smile when Jensen was speaking, it was adorable! 

J2 Virtual Panel 

[1ddiscourseoftheday]

Thurs 19 Nov ‘20

The big story of the day is Liam's Happy Hour podcast (it is uh neither one hour nor all happy but OKAY) in which as he says, they “really did talk about anything and everything.” For those of you who are new to the experience of Liam being given a lot of time (over 100 minutes in this case) and not interrupted or made to answer the same four Qs over and over, honestly? He gives so much and is so charming and it's wonderful, but also trigger warning for mental health struggles and substance use at the very least, if not for the way they all were treated by management as very young people besides. He has been through a lot and is still dealing with a lot of really hard stuff, and he's very aware and savvy about how the tabloids treat his painful revelations, and yet he continues to be vulnerable and open publicly, when no one could blame him for choosing not to (WELL they definitely could and would but I wouldn't.) It's a true gift he gives to us who are so hungry for personal knowledge and behind the scenes detail, even though we have also been the source of so much stress for him. “How shit is the world if you can’t cuddle Liam Payne?” asks the podcast host and...yeah. I think we'd all like to do that today!

Anyway, onward! Liam talks about his mental health struggles, as he has done before, about the anxiety he has dealt with about being in public and about feeling watched even at home, and the things that made him feel that way such as people crowding around his house and banging on the windows for example. He mentions again the meds he used to be on that had “to do with happiness... to not feel so numb all the time” that made him have dissociative episodes as a result of stage lights sometimes and blank on lyrics, but the really good news here is that unlike the last time it came up this is a past tense story! He says he is not taking that anymore. But he says he always uses a prompter now because he still worries about messing up onstage, and not everything troubling is past tense: he says “I surround myself with people that bully me at some points, but not in a nasty bully way... very lad humor kind of thing. We’ve a laugh, you know?”. I GUESS... but actually can we just not bully Liam at all please? :(( He says he always tries to make time for fans but sometimes he just can't handle doing it, but also talks about how much he's enjoyed all the new social media stuff he's been able to do over the last months. “When you are in the postion I'm in and have this lovely fanbase, you feel like you're communicating with them in the right way,” he said about his attempts to connect with us, but says the middle men make that hard. He says he loves doing the youtube videos because “if I've anything I want to say I can just say it myself without somebody being in the way.” He says he stopped doing it as a weekly quarantine times roundup because he wasn't really doing enough stuff to round up, YEAH: relatable!

He continues to be our sole source of 1D behind the scenes tidbits (and Louis gossip)-- about band days he talks about how he and Louis struggled over who was leading the band but learned to work together, about how they were so young at the beignning that they just thought their tour manager was the boss of them and let them tell them anything to do, including just being confined to hotels for days at a time because it was easier for the higher ups. He tells about management telling him he was going to have to take the role of the “the person that sometimes people don’t like”, ugh poor Liam, and being made to be “a weird One Direction narc” by management. He says that “the day that they signed their contract with their label they got one of the biggest telling offs ever, but he can’t tell the reasons why it happened”, ummmmm, and that he can't stand to watch The X Factor now because he knows what doing well will do to someone's life. “I was part of this machine and I knew my part in the machine,” he says, “Towards the end of the band I became like ‘the loud drunken one’ and I was very good at that too.” But on a lighter note, Louis stories!! Liam says they talk a lot and tells a great story about Louis telling someone in a store 'no I'm not Louis Tomlinson! I just look like him!' and them being like nah actually you're better looking than him LMAO. Compliment or insult NO ONE KNOWS but it figures it would be Louis himself they'd say that about; it simply wouldn't make sense about anyone else. AND FINALLY he told us something that was very much news to us; he says he proposed to Maya last December when he was in Texas visiting her family. He says he worked it out with her mom and took her to restaurant where she was surprised by a room full of flowers and him waiting to propose. A picture of her in a room lined with red roses and full of candles from around that time was found and is assumed to be from that. (They announced their engagement in August of this year.)

Other things did happen too, though (thankfully for us updaters) not too many of them. Liam posted more of his art-- it's the Queen in watercolor! And it's super cute and expressive and how is he so good at art?! In about 16 hours a behind the scenes video from Niall's Royal Albert Hall show will post! Harry followed Silvia Calderoni, the star of the Gucci fest shorts, and “a representative from Gucci” says they think Harry's appearance “might have been an improvised moment.” Well yes I thought it was unscripted too, that sounded like Harry and like Harry when he's talking himself rather than delivering lines, but there you have it from someone with I guess more authority than me. But it doesn't sound like how Harry talks when he's REALLY off script and reverts to his cute teen Harry style-- exhibit, a model from the Watermelon Sugar video who was clearly excited to have gained access to Harry's DMs posted a screenshot of her chat with him. She compliments him, and he says “faaaaaanks”, lol, she asks him who Golden is about (??? girl WYD???) and he replies “hiiiiii not telling you.” Funny that, I could have sworn there were loads of articles that have the answer to this and it was super public knowledge or something, HUH HOW ODD. Almost like that's ...not true? Peculiar!