#I am so g-d damn exhausted.

[mazeinthemiroh]

lee felix sfw alphabet

genre: fluffy wuffy for the fluffiest boy in town

word count: 2k

warnings: none

song rec: magic by coldplay

pls like and reblog if you enjoyed! feel free to request anything <3

a - affection (how affectionate are they? how do they show affection)

lee felix is the definition of love

therefore, he shows affection in pretty much every single thing he does

without even trying, he is effortlessly affectionate and never fails to make those around him feel safe, happy and loved

b - best friend (what would they be like as a best friend?)

as your bestie, he's tagging you on every social media and spamming with your memes and tiktoks to watch. like... that's basically a given, anyway

he's just so sweet really

is down for anything you want to do

c - cuddles (would they like to cuddle? how do they cuddle?)

bro, where do i begin...

he's a cuddle bug. literally the most cuddliest person in the whole world who will literally die if he doesn't get his hourly cuddles so you better cuddle him lots istg-

basically, yes. he loves cuddling

he's such a fluffy human being, inside and out. he needs his partner to like cuddles fr; this will probably be a genuine reason for him to date you if i am being totally honest

d = domestic (do they want to settle down? how are they at cooking and cleaning?)

felix totally wants to settle down

and i feel like once he finds the right person there's no going back for him. the only way is up!!

he's good at baking and likes making little treats every now and then for the two of you to share

has tried his hand at cooking too and makes a pretty good chef!

e = ending (if they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

damn he hates even thinking about stuff like this

just expect a lot of tears; a lot of conflicting and confusing emotions all at once

he hates confrontation in general so having to prompt a break-up is not where he wants to be in a relationship, ever

it will take a massive toll on him and will be emotionally exhausting for the both of you

f = fiance(e) (how do they feel about commitment? how quick would they want to get married?)

big fan of commitment

only has eyes for his soulmate and no one else

because... why should he? at the end of the day, he is loyal, through thick and thin

he won't get married too quickly but then he wouldn't wait too long either. i feel like he would be nervous and would need to know for definite that, if he proposed to you, you would 100% say yes

g = gentle (how gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

i don't even feel the need to say anything for this one

he's literally a baby chick. what's he gonna do? peck you to death? yeah, i didn't think so

h = hugs (do they like hugs? how often do they do it? what are their hugs like?)

i mean this one goes without saying, doesn't it?

felix lives for hugs. he needs the to survive. he has them for breakfast

hugs. hugs. HUGS.

there's something about how warm and welcome he feels inside when someone gives him a hug

he loves all forms of hugs

back hugs make him feel protected if he's on the receiving end of it. he loves to be in his lover's arms like that

i = i love you (how fast do they say the L-word?)

it's so hard to say

part of me is thinking he might just blurt it out spontaneously, much like an intrusive thought. he might not even think about it when he says it until he realises and his eyes grow super wide like 'omg i just said the L word to you for the first time wtf'

the other part of me knows that felix is a deep thinker. he overthinks everything and is therefore likely to hold back on confessing such strong emotion so quickly

but holding his love back won't be easy regardless of what he chooses, so the likelihood is that he would definitely confess to you before you confess to him

j = jealousy (how jealous do they get? what do they do when they're jealous?)

i can see him getting jealous tbh

and he never means to. he's not one to look for things to argue about and stuff

but because he has so, so much to give, if he isn't receiving that same amount of love it's hard for him. then, seeing you get closer or flirting with another person is even harder for him

k = kisses (what are their kisses like? where do they like to kiss you? where do they like to be kissed?)

his kisses on the lips are usually soft and tender

he literally doesn't have a favourite place to kiss you because he will kiss you everywhere

but for him? he won't tell you unless you brought it up, but... his neck is super sensitive

he doesn't even have to tell you because it's so easy to tell. when his breath becomes hitched in his throat when you kiss him along his neck. when his grip becomes tighter when you merely brush your lips over the sweet spots of his neck. yeah. he's not exactly subtle when it comes to what he likes

l = little ones (how are they around children?)

he loves children and is so sweet to them

will cater to their every need and spoil them horrifically

will even carry them everywhere if they so wished

and when it comes to babies, he can't help but coo and squish their cheekies :(( he just loves them to bits

m = morning (how are mornings spent with them?)

he wakes up smiling because he is next to you

like-

you make him so freaking happy

he usually wakes up earlier than he usually would now that he is with, you, just so he can fit in a cuddle sesh before he starts the day

and then he reluctantly gets out of bed, stretching in every sort of way possible before getting in the shower

some days he will spontaneously decide to make pancakes for you both :] and drizzle those bad boys with maple syrup and crispy bacon, yes sir

n = night (how are nights spent with them?)

again, a very cuddly and cosy affair

fluffy pyjamas on, skincare products ready, and a disney film ready to play

all you guys need is a pile of blankets and a box of takeaway, and you got yourselves an ideal night

this is definitely his fave time of day <333

o = open (when would they start revealing things about themselves? do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

literally asap

that's the whole part of getting to know someone better, no? reveal different parts of yourself, piece by piece, like a jigsaw puzzle. that's how felix views it

he's big on quality time so the more time and energy you invest in him, the more he opens up to you and feels comfortable around you

so it solely depends on how much time you spend together

p = patience (how easily angered are they?)

he is not a naturally angry person

like, i know some people who are just prone to anger. they have a certain type of aggression on the surface that rises every time a minor inconvenience happens

but even in those types of situations, felix is much more likely to get upset than angry

although sometimes in an argument, his sadness comes with anger. his tears come with his raised voice and the overwhelming stress of it all. his emotions aren't necessarily black and white, especially his negative ones. they are sort of an accumulation of each other.

q = quizzes (how much would they remember about you? do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

felix is such a caring person and it's quite impressive to see just how much he remembers about everyone he loves

that's why he is so good at giving gifts! he remembers what people have pointed out before in the past, or remembers everyone's hobbies and interests

just everything. he knows a lot more than he gives himself credit for, that's for sure

r = remember (what is their favourite moment in your relationship?)

every single moment with you is genuinely so impactful and important for felix

that's why he remembers every little detail. that's why he takes pictures whenever you go out together. that's why he always thinks fondly of the past whilst readily arranging more stuff for you to do together

all the moments with you are his favourite, as cliché as it sounds. he genuinely couldn't be happier

s = security (how protective are they? how would they protect you? how would they like to be protected?)

he is quite protective actually

he just needs to know your okay and well and if you're not then he gets upset

loyalty to the end and will defend you for as long as possible

but typically, felix is on the receiving end of protection. so i feel like it would work both ways in your relationship

t = try (how much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

felix is notorious for being the best gift-giver

and he doesn't need a special occasion to prove his love for you

sometimes he will buy you things he comes across randomly

"i saw this and thought of you"

and sometimes he will even make a gift for you. there are no limits to his love!

in regards to dates, i'd say he's a romantic guy for sure so he will try and do all the cliche dates to ever exist just because he thinks it's such a cute idea

u = ugly (what would be some bad habits of theirs?)

he doesn't have any bad habits.

that's it. that's me done for this one.

v = vanity (how concerned are they with their looks?)

this guy has a fluctuating self-esteem and, more recently, a negative view of himself and his body

so he is concerned with his looks. much more than he should be

and all i hope for him is that he comes to a time in his life where he is happy with how he is and doesn't feel the need to change anything about himself

because he is perfect. he really is.

w = whole (would they feel incomplete without you?)

yes. felix is a person who has the tendency to rely on others

and once he finds his special someone, there's no turning back for him

he does believe in soulmates and after meeting you, he realises that his life has changed forever. living without you simply isn't a real reality to him

doesn't matter what multiverse you're in, in every case you are his and he is yours

x = xtra (a random headcanon for them.)

brownie boy here needs to have baking dates with you

he likes feeling useful so when you ask how to make his special type of brownies he feels confident in himself as he teaches you how to make them

and he is a gentle and calm teacher <3

just wants to have fun tbh

ends up throwing flour on your just because

you both are licking all the brownie mixture off the cutlery once you're done #traditions

idk it's just such a good time and he loves having that type of fun with you

y = yuck (what are some things they wouldn't like, either in general or in a partner?)

felix is a very accepting and tolerating person

but he dislikes people who are ruthless and insensitive

he has a very sensitive soul to begin with. then, paired with someone who is unnecessarily harsh and doesn't even seem to care they've hurt someone? not a good mix

z = zzz (what is a sleep habit of theirs?)

i don't know what to tell you, except for the fact that he looks just so at peace when he sleeps

truly angelic

probably has a very cute, quiet little snore

and will have to cuddle into you because he's just ;-; yeah

[thelunaticghost]

xvn fic recs !!

i have been meaning to do this for a while : mostly because fic recs are fun to compile and also thee seems to be a BIG shortage of any fic rec posts!! so here are some fics i have enjoyed over the years!! ofc this list is non exhaustive please note the ratings of each fic and heed the tags before reading! sorry, that i am putting in the shorter summary

anyway!! feel free to put in more fic recs too!! :D

End OTW Racism | over the edge of all our knowings by merthurlin [ G, 10,146 words , 1/1 ]

Years down the line, after the whole business with Lumine and her brother has been concluded, Venti decides to go on a world tour. He sends Xiao letters.

merthurlin got me into xiaoven so ofc my list starts with her fic! this is just so so sweet and even if its not necessarily fluffy there is a warmth to the writing it is a comfort read for me! i recommend every work by her (regardless of fandom). though in xvn End OTW racism | never dreamed of nobody like you is another excellent fic!

nocturne by yanrans [ T, 34,540 words, 4/4 ]

In which Venti sells magical music boxes, Xiao is his unwitting customer, and there is absolutely, definitely nothing more to it at all.

modern au where venti is - a scammer? - i mean a music box seller and xiao is just a regular guy and and. its funny and delightful and absolutely breath taking. i wouldnt elaborate more so as not to spoil anything further but the fic has many unexpected surprises in it! yanrans is another writer i definitely recommend to check out more! their writing style is very flamboyant and poetic.

what hides in neon shadow by morii_tea [ T, 7,547 words, 1/1 ]

In which Xiao is a cyborg, Venti is a thief, and the glittering city of Teyvat hides more secrets than they’re prepared to find out.

its so rare to see morally grey venti is potrayed (even though he isnt v morally grey but still. xiao having to remembering that venti isnt as honourable as he appears is yesssss wohoo). this fic has some thrilling action and a v fun cyberpunk world!! i wish it was longer but it is v exciting nevertheless

every morning in the dark by magicites [ M, 77,124 words, 34/34 ]

Stuck in a time loop where he succumbs to his karmic debt, Xiao struggles to see the point in moving forward. Venti struggles to save him.

READ THE TAGS!!! character death and suicidal thoughts are two major warnings. but DAMN this fic it's just so. SO FULL of everything WRONG with xiao!! and venti too but such a GREAT angst fic!! it gets everything so Right. magicites also happened to have written one of my most favourite genshin fic too :] and if you havent read her other works!! you are missing out!!

the half-life of the yaksha is absolute by GStK [ G, 1,000 words, 1/1 ]

Venti digs his thumbs in to keep open the wound but it is too late His gaze snaps over to the teal essence dancing over Xiao’s fingers. Now all those words will belong to him And Venti will belong to him, only.

READ THE TAGS!! now that i have went into the time loop fic ofc i have to mention the beautiful corrupt xiao prose. the imagery is flowery and grotesque!

foreigner's god by smallghosts [ T, 3,818 words, 1/1 ]

Lord Barbatos falls asleep for a few hundred years. Xiao copes with his absence in strange ways.

a pre-canon fic where xiao becomes - in a way - a worshipper? it's SO GOOD. its about the yearning!!!!!!!!! SCREAMS i dont think i have to explain further

love me like you do by Limerancy [ T, 3,000 words, 1/1 ]

They aren’t the kind of friends that touch.

TOUCH STARVED AND TOUCH AVERSE XIAO!!!!!! this fic makes me a lil bit feral. a little unhinged. i absolutely enjoy reading about the yearning , the desire JUST!!!! AAAA. this writer also writes v fluffy modern au one shots!!! so be sure to check them out too :)

The Kissing Tree by Princeliest [ G, 7,581 words, 2/2 ]

Venti kisses Xiao, and Xiao does not understand why.

VENTI COMMITMENT ISSUES!!!!! as much as i adore reading xiao angst, venti angst is still something i love seeking out and its a tragedy that its not explored enough in this ship :c but anyway!!! such amazing characterization and exploration!! princeliest is one of fav genshin writers and this fic delivers!

wishing on dandelions all of the time by OedipusOctopus [ T, 8,270 words, 1/1 ]

When Venti first catches sight of the swords artfully hung on the wall of his new roommate's bedroom, he regrets putting up the sublease on Craigslist. Firmly believing this guy is a total weirdo, Venti is more surprised than anyone when he realizes the total weirdo is actually adorable. It's not against some invisible Roommate Code to dream about kissing your roommate, right?

ofc there is a classic roommate au fic!! this was one of my most favourite fic from last years xvn week: its hilarious and silly and just a perfect relaxing read!! the characterization and their banter is so entertaining i admit i have read this multiple times!

Where Words Fail by kavvueh [ T, 27,926 words, 11/12 ]

"You're Barbatos," Xiao repeats breathlessly. The young man in front of him nods. "Yep." "But..." Xiao cuts himself off and tries again. "You're the God of songs and poetry." The Anemo Archon nods his head sagely. "More or less." Xiao fixes Lord Barbatos with the most incredulous look he can manage. "... You're failing Music Theory."

this fic is such a delight!! it has some light background lore, some silly shenanigans, miscommunications, pinning - a truly fun mixture! the fic is v light hearted but written with a lot of tenderness. i am v excited to see its conclusion!

what queer sins stain thy soul by Anonymous [ M, 3,232 words, 1/1 ]

In which Xiao, long-established asexual, learns that identity is not as stable as he’d like to believe.

there is some explicit things in it (in non explicit way) i believe religious guilt is one of the best flavouring to xvn. it is an under-explored area in this ship imo and this fic not only has that but also!!! asexuality !!!!!! this fic so so personal and its exploration of desire that gets to me a lot

unholy virtues by morphasia [ E, 17,065 words, 6/6 ]

In exchange for his body in more ways than one, Venti summons a demon to reclaim something that has been stolen from him. It's a just contract. That's all it's supposed to be. That's all it was ever supposed to be.

READ THE TAGS!!! this fic truly went creature/creature. this au is just so fascinating and funny in a twisted way (but not bad). this fic isnt for everyone though but it is definitely worth the shot.

[roguelibrarian]

books I read in 2023

Threw together a list of books I read this year plus brief thoughts about them Just Because.

The Marsh King's Daughter by Karen Dionne - I was so, so ready to like this book and then like one chapter in suddenly got hit with the reveal that the backstory to it is the racist trope of "big scary Native man kidnaps a pure, virginal white girl to be his wife." So....fuck that shit.

So Many Beginnings by Bethany C. Morrow - Heck yes. Excellent book. It's a retelling of Little Women set in the Roanoke Freedmen's Colony. The author leans into how aro-coded Jo is. Also Beth lives.

Renegades by Marissa Meyer - Yeah, I didn't finish this one. I got so bored.

Common Bonds: A Speculative Aromantic Anthology ed. by Claudie Arseneault, C.T. Callahan, B.R. Sanders, and RoAnna Sylver - I mean it's an anthology, so some of the stories just did not work for me, but I am ecstatic over the concept alone and most of it was amazing.

The Companion by Katie Alender - Creepy as shit in the best possible way. My one complaint is that after 200 pages without a hint of romance, suddenly a character showed up who was so obviously meant to be the main character's love interest and that part was exhausting. Otherwise excellent, amazing, chilling as hell, and you know I love me some abuse narratives.

All These Bodies by Kendare Blake - I wanted to like this one so bad and it's not that I didn't like it, but it was just kinda...mostly okay? I felt like I was supposed to be creeped out and scared and tbh I should have been because there's some pretty disturbing shit in this book but all just fell so flat.

Sounds Fake But Okay: An Asexual and Aromantic Perspective on Love, Relationships, Sex, and Pretty Much Everything Else by Sarah Costello and Kayla Kaszyca - Bad. Just bad. Oh my g-d this book was so bad and irritating and just...if you want to learn more about aspec people or think you might be aspec yourself, please read literally anything else. I won't go into detail because I wrote a whole post about it here, but just...bad.

Ace and Aro Journeys: A Guide to Embracing Your Aromantic or Asexual Identity by The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project - So, this was definitely better than Sounds Fake But Okay overall, but there is a thread of deep discomfort with the existence of sex-repulsed and romance-repulsed aspecs that keeps popping up throughout the book. It is pretty clear that at least one of the authors (and probably more than one since there were several and apparently no one raised a strong enough objection to get any of this shit scrapped or rewritten) really Does Not Like sex-repulsed and romance-repulsed people.

The Wicked Remain by Laura Pohl - Second part of a duology, and the first book was definitely better. I low-key suspect that this book might have just been Once Upon A Time fanfiction with the serial numbers filed off. That said, I am always here for queerplatonic relationship rep and stories where the Cinderella character ends up single.

Song of the Lioness quartet by Tamora Pierce - Series of four books, but I'm putting all of them together here because a) my thoughts are kinda the same and b) this post is already too long. I'm not gonna say much because I have a whole post about this series in my drafts already so I'll just leave it with yeah my nostalgia for these books has worn off quite a bit.

Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo - This was another reread and yeah it still holds up just as good as the first time I read it. Literally this is one of my favorite books.

The Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo - Another reread. Excellent. Love a sequel that's just as good as the first one. Also one of my favorite books.

King of Scars by Leigh Bardugo - Yeah I was on a rereading spree this year. This one is also so damn good.

Rule of Wolves by Leigh Bardugo - Last Grishaverse book on the list, I promise. So good. Nina went completely off the rails in this one and I love every second of it. Really everyone went off the rails a little bit but Nina most of all.

The Pomegranate Gate by Ariel Kaplan - I have a post about this one here so I won't say too much in this post but g-d I love how unapologetically Jewish this book is. No stopping to explain things to any goyim who might be reading. No coddling goyishe feelings while portraying antisemitism. This book is for Jews and that's beautiful.

Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson - Yet another reread. Actually, genuinely accurate portrayal of how PTSD triggers work. First sign of healing not being a romantic relationship but being the main character telling a shitty friend to fuck off. Literally the only thing stopping me from wholeheartedly shouting "I love this book so much" is that there's a random use of the r-word because this book is from the 90s and back then it was basically illegal to publish fiction about teenagers without having your characters use that word.

We're Not Broken: Changing the Autism Conversation by Eric Garcia - So I've got mixed feelings about it but ultimately I'd say this book is a net positive. Definitely recommend it for nonautistic people and for autistic people whose only exposure to the autistic community is through spaces like tumblr. Just don't have this be the only book you read about autistic people, you know?

[teja-has-puppet-autism]

wOOF sometimes I forget I have ptsd, and good l-rd I am so grateful that I have a small amount of pretty specific triggers cause g-d damn this shit is exhausting.

I'm a lucky fuckin man that I don't have to handle flashbacks more often

[wabblebees]

.

[whaleofatjme1920]

In a Mirror Image (Eyeless Jack X F!Reader)

🌸 In a Mirror Image

[Eyeless Jack X F!Reader]

[Warnings: blood, language, cheating (both physical but it's not like, in your face, and emotional)]

Part 1

The flowers that grow like weeds in your lungs bloom thicker and thicker every day. Your vision clouds with blue more often than not, and you can’t think about anything but the blossoms and blood that paint the bathroom with a hue you’re already much too used to. It’s a painful existence, and it’s getting worse. One of the most wretched parts? You’re deteriorating so fast that your vision no longer services you. You are blind, unrendered to see. You still choose to live in a delusion, and you are amongst the only who choose not to acknowledge it.

By now, everyone knows but only one other than you refuses to acknowledge it.

You hear Hoodie arguing with Jack more often than not. It seems the blond haired proxy is angry over what Jack has done to you and because he knows what Hanahaki does to those it takes root in.

“You’ll fucking kill her,” Hoodie seethes as he gets in Jack’s face for the fourth time this weekend. “Look at her-”

“I am!” Jack shot back, his arms crossing defensively over his chest. “Who are you to come in here and speculate on something that you’re not a part of?” He growls. Normally, Jack likes talking to Hoodie, but not when Hoodie’s on a mission to prove Jack a sinner.

“I wasn’t even aware you still had one,” Hoodie retorts through grit teeth. “I can’t believe you. Look at the flowers Ja-” and before he can continue tearing into Jack, he hears your bedroom door open.

While you still share the room with Jack, neither of you are in it at the same time. You’ve taken residence up on the living room couch with Kate and Jack more often than not stays with Leia. The room you share is usually empty, much like your heart.

“Hey there, buttercup,” Hoodie suddenly greets you as you tiredly walk into the kitchen where the two men had previously been in a standoff. “Did you sleep okay?” He asks, voice so much softer and gentler with you than what he had just been using.

You shake your head as you take a seat at the table. “I can’t sleep,” you say.

Hoodie’s brows furrow in sympathy before they knit in frustration when Jack sits next to you. He watches as Jack snakes his arm around you before he presses an empty kiss to the side of your head.

“No?” Jack says in a sickly saccharine tone. “I’ll see what I can do about that. Does that sound good to you?”

You nod slightly, the ghost of a smile on your lips. “That sounds good,” you murmur back.

“Anything for you,” he hums as he pulls you in closer to his side.

“You disgust me,” Hoodie hisses to Jack as he gets up and pushes in his chair roughly, making the table bounce. He doesn’t take his eyes off of Jack for a second as he leaves, roughly slamming the front door behind him.

“What was that about?” You ask, feigning innocence. You refuse to open your eyes to the situation you are in.

“He’s having a bad day,” Jack answers. “Don’t worry your pretty little head about it,” he hums as he presses another kiss to the side of your head.

The butterflies in your stomach are dead, but the flowers blood evermore.

“You’re still sleeping out here?” Kate hums as she takes a seat next to you on the couch. She looks exhausted and she’s covered in blood. Her mask is cracked too.

“I guess,” you yawn as you shift slightly from your not so comfortable position. “How has your day been?” You ask as you reach for a glass of water only to see it’s not there.

“Let me,” Kate says as she gets up once more. She knows you’re getting worse. After getting you a bottle of water from the fridge, she comes back to your side. “I’ve had a busy day. Met with an independent named Nyein. They remind me of a big cat,” she finally answers as she opens the water bottle for you.

You take it and begin to slowly sip from it - it stops the flowers from blooming ever so slightly. Your airway opens just a little bit. “Do they now?”

Kate nods as she flips mindlessly through the channels. “They said they’re falling in love with a human. Bad business,” Kate winces, her dark eyes watching you carefully. “I hope they don’t…”

“It’s bad business,” you suddenly say as you feel petals fill your mouth. You cough slightly and the small little forget-me-nots fall into your lap, thankfully free of blood this time. You take one of the flowers into your fingertips and observe it gently. “I hope they’re okay.”

Kate puts her hand on your thigh, lightly squeezing before finally settling on the early evening news. “You wanna burn these blue fuckers?” She asks as the flowers in your lap remain stagnant save for the buds that unfurl at an alarmingly fast pace.

You feel the corners of your lips curl into a smile. “Yes.”

Morbid, your flowers have been springing up everywhere. They’ve infested the temporary house. So, you and Kate went around the place, plucking every single one before starting a bonfire in the backyard.

Toby, who considers himself a bit of a pyromaniac, was immediately summoned by the fire the two of you had cast in the backyard. He’d been out on a grocery run, and honestly, he had wanted to get out of the house.

The dynamics of the house had become uncomfortable to him. What with Leia and Jack sneaking off together and you coughing up a full greenhouse, he has been stressed. Toby can’t stand Jack and Hoodie arguing all the time as it reminds him of the life he tried to escape, and Masky can offer so much but ever since he renounced his love for Jay by force… It’s been hard. Toby knows it’s been hard for everyone involved.

He crosses through the house, sneers at Leia’s room, and then exits through the back to the scent of fire. He sees Kate’s arm around you as the fire blazes slightly blue.

“W-What are you g-gals up to?” He asks, coming to your other side so you remain in the middle.

“Burning stuff,” Kate nonchalantly replies. “You care to chuck anything in?”

Toby glances at you as you struggle to keep air in your lungs. “If I d-d-did, I’d be u-under c-charge for killing a-a-another under the O-Operator’s care,” he muses. He’s referring to Jack, of course. He takes in the scent of burning plant matter and blood and frowns when he remembers it’s yours. His hand reaches yours and squeezes gently.

You squeeze back.

Your experiences with Leia are lukewarm at best, and cold at worst. She’s something, she really is something. There’s moments when no one is in the temp house with you except for her alongside you, and those moments are tense, sharp, like a knife and burn colder than the depths of the sea.

The most memorable conversation you’ve ever had was the one that triggered a domino effect that would lead to a black hole in your chest.

“You’re still up?” Leia’s honeyed voice questions softly as she takes a seat across from you on the back porch at the glass table.

You find it more stifling inside so you choose to spend your time out. The weather is warm, afterall. The sun shines and fluffy clouds the size of whales swim overhead. You have a glass of pink lemonade made from a pouch Hoodie and Kate had picked up earlier. You find that the tang is enough to keep the flowers down.

“Of course I am, why wouldn’t I be?” You say in passing before you sip from the glass. You enjoy watching the rabbits in the backyard. They hop around without a care in the world.

She begins to thread her fingers through her long silver hair, braiding it. “I just think you should be resting,” she says. “You look so tired these days-”

“That’s none of your concern.”

“Touched a nerve,” she sighs. “You know you’re getting worse, right?”

You shoot her a glare, but you know she’s right. You’ve actually been holding out surprisingly longer than most people with Hanahaki Disease. Most people succumb to it within a few weeks of coughing, but you’ve managed to hold out for damn near an entire year. That’s almost unheard of. You’ve been hacking up flowers, their stems, roots and blood ever since Leia came into your life.

Everyone tells you that you’re getting worse, but you should have been dead months ago.

“Stop it,” you growl.

“You’re killing yourself,” she continues. “You could just… Let it all go, y’know?” She hums as she continues to fishtail her silver strands. “Renounce your feelings for him and save yourself.”

You grip your glass and set it back down roughly on the table. “That is literally none of your concern,” you repeat, eyes narrowing at the blue eyed beauty across from you. “Acting like you care-”

“I do, though,” she cuts you off. “I know that the Slender Man has big plans for you, but with you wasting away like this… You’ll never live long enough to see them through.” She flashes you a look of concern, but you can tell it’s fake. It shines like pyrite.

“What, so you can take my place just like that?” You bite back. “You can’t even wait until I’m fucking dead?”

Leia giggles and you hate to admit that it sounds pretty. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. Daddy always did say I got what I wanted.” Her eyes drift off and you’re able to see she’s no longer thinking about you, but someone who once loved her. She finishes the braid. “Happy six years to you and Jack. Give him all my regards, won’t you?” She stands up, eyes the rabbits feasting on the clover in the grass, before she plucks your half empty glass from in front of you.

“Leia-!”

“It’s not like you need it,” she chuckles.

“It’s a special day,” you said to Masky, a small smile on your face. “It’s our six year anniversary.” Your posture changes to attention as he closes the door softly behind him. He still smells like cigarettes, but it’s a pleasant scent you’ve found comfort in where others find it a nuisance.

Masky put a smile on his face but it didn't reach his eyes. “You need me to draw a portal or something for you?” He holds his arms open to you as you fall into them, part because you’re so weak and secondly because he knows you need the affection - even if he can’t feel it.

You feel light come to your eyes as you nod after leaving a note for Jack in your shared room on his nightstand.

‘Dear Jack, happy six years! I’d wait for you to get back, but I have a surprise for you at the field you gifted to me for our first anniversary. I await you with happiness. Love, R.’

Masky drew the portal in the living room, a mess of swirling cloud-like silvers and blacks before he laid eyes upon the place you once shared only with Jack. “It’s super pretty,” he says, dark eyes scanning over all the wildflowers. There’s weeds on the path, like no one has cared for it in a while. ‘How poetic,’ he thinks. ‘It’s an allegory for your decayed relationship with Jack.’

“No it’s not,” you giggle as you bring Masky down one of the weed and chicory covered paths to the gazebo. “But it’s special to me,” you hum as you take a seat.

Masky follows beside you. He doesn’t take a seat, mostly feeling it wrong to impose on a space that is Jack’s despite his respect for him falling so far from what it used to be, but takes in the scent of dying flowers all the same. It’s summer, and instead of the sun warming the soft petals, it’s burning them. When you cough up more flowers while waiting for the man who still holds your heart (and refuses to return it) you’re less than pleased to see that they blend in with the untamed mosaic.

“Are you still tired?” Masky asks softly as he lights up a cigarette. “You can rest, I’m sure he won’t mind.”

You glance over to Masky before you rest your head in your hands, wondering where your lover is. You listen to the wind as it blows through the leaves. You listen to Masky’s hum, and eventually, you fall asleep.

You wake back up sometime during the night in your bed and not in a position you normally sleep in. It looks like whoever delivered you back here was extra careful with handling you. You only wake up because Jack has accidentally turned on the light.

“Shit, my bad,” he apologizes, quickly plunging the room back into darkness. “Did I wake you?” He knows he did.

“No,” you lie. “I couldn’t sleep anyways.” That was the most rest you’ve had in months. “Where have you been?” You ask quietly, still choosing to remain buried in the sheets.

Jack slides into bed next to you and gets comfortable. He smells like perfume you don’t wear. Through the faint light of the hallway that peeks under your door, you can see he’s got dark marks on his neck and jaw. “Leia wanted to show me her childhood home. Place isn’t run by Zalgo anymore, so we took a trip out there.”

“Did you now?” You hum as you feel tears prick your eyes.

Jack can see you in the dark. His vision at night far surpasses a human’s. He just chooses not to acknowledge it. Jack knows that his relationship with you is gone, and that you’ve been coughing up flowers for the past year. He knows, and it hurts him. Hurts him deeply that he’s the one causing you such pain, but at the same time, he’s a coward. He chooses not to let you go cleanly because his relationship with Leia is so finite.

He knows she only wants him because at the time he was unattainable. Now that she has him, it is only a matter of time until she does to him what he’s done to you. He understands that fully, but he refuses to leave the safety net that is you because he is selfish. His feelings for you aren’t nonexistent, but it’s that kind of fondness one has after the deed has been done, a love based on past memory and sentiment rather than what will and can be. It has reached his threshold, and you both are too caught up in security rather than what is healthy.

“I did,” he says as his mind rushes a mile a minute. “What did you do today?”

You wonder if you should answer that honestly or not. Would he even care? “I stayed here today, nothing special.” You feel the flowers unfurling in your lungs.

Jack hums once more, his back now facing you as he slowly succumbs to sleep.

You met Masky in the bathroom again, hacking your lungs and more of those fucking flowers up into the bathrub and the sink. Hell, you even got some in the toilet. Your body is growing weaker and weaker by the day. The fact you’ve held out for a year is astronomical, but you know you’ll be being taken from it eventually. No one survives Hanahaki when their lover’s feelings aren’t returned. It either gets returned, or you lose them all entirely.

He almost lost you. You broke the mirror when your body went limp as the vines and flowers crawled out from your lungs, through your esophagus and out of your mouth. If it was an art installation piece, Masky might’ve thought it beautiful, but the fact you went cold and limp and the flowers were blooming at a rapid pace - one he thought he couldn’t keep up with.

Masky, despite not being able to really feel anything, panicked as he took you into his arms. Did he genuinely care for you? No, but he cared to whatever extent the surgery left him with. He fretted because you are under his direct care. He cared so deeply because he too had seen many good proxies and independents lost to it. He cared because a part of him remembered what it was like to have daisies and rhododendrons fill his lungs. Normally, you only have one type of flower to clutter your lungs. Science says “just because.” An old wives’ tale says “love truly lost.” In his case? Jay’s death. Nothing was the same after that.

Masky took no hesitation in scooping you up into his arms and running out of the house to the forest to be closer to his boss’s energy. The Operator could fix this should he will it. He didn’t care that the lights in the house went on from his concerned proxies - the ones who had been sick over what befell you since you came into their care. He didn’t dare let you go as he trampled through the brush in the dead of night, using only the moon.

“Sir!” He calls out frantically. “Sir! I need your help!” He can hear your heart get slower and slower.

And just like that, the devoted father came to his child’s cry.

“My child,” he greets, instantly swooping down to look at your pained, flowery visage. “Did I not tell you to handle this?” He chides softly as he takes you into his arms. The sound of static only grows louder and louder.

“I thought she could,” he says, his tone clearly apologetic. “Please, just… Just fix this for me.” He watches the Operator closely as the tall man holds you in his arms.

While you are not exactly his child directly, you are also still under his care. Leia did not lie that the Operator sees good things for you. Without any other words, the tall man is gone, giving you to gods know who to perform a surgery that should be considered the only humane way out.

He returns to the house where Hoodie, Kate and Toby eagerly awaited him, clamoring around him and pecking like hens wondering where you are. He says that you’re in the hands of a god.

You floated in the ether, your body a galaxy. You watched as your chest was torn open - looked like by the hands of an independent that had talons to rival an eagle.

‘There’s so much,’ she says, her mouth turning into a frown as she worked on carefully removing the clusters of flowers. ‘How is she not dead?’

The Slender Man continues to observe, not offering the doctor any words.

The spirals and swirls inside of you continue to swirl before the flowers get torn out, one by one. The roots that cling to your lungs are stubborn, but with every single one removed, the lights of a different universe go out. Snuffed. Lost. The cavity in your chest grows wider until it births a black hole.

‘How much longer?’ The Slender Man asks, watching as the independent calls in another to help her rid your body of weeds.

She shakes her head as she continues to root them out. They bloom under her touch. ‘I have no idea - she must’ve felt so strongly-’

‘They just keep coming up, Sir,’ the other interjects, her four eyes scanning you rapidly.

The black hole begins to suck up the stars and nebulas that comprise your system. It feasts on you, making every part of what made you you, disappear in its depths. It grows larger as it consumes you. It grows heavier. It grows more powerful.

‘We’re almost there,’ the taloned independent says, her wings fluttering softly to emphasize her point. ‘I’ve never seen it this bad before.’

‘Fix this,’ the Slender Man seethes, his patience wearing thin. He knows your body will not be able to handle this much longer.

The black hole reaches its mass, and slowly, it begins to consume you. It overtakes you, bathes you, and leaves nothing left when it has taken all that it can. Your body is empty. You are a shell. Glimpses of blue, grey and reddish brown flash in your mind’s eye and through the eye of the black hole, but you cannot place the feelings you used to associate with them. You remember, but you do not feel.

The last of the flowers are pulled. The taloned independent is exhausted, and her partner is just as tired. ‘Good fucking lord,’ she breathes out, exhausted from the late night gardening session. ‘In all my years I have never seen that awful disease take hold of an individual that bad,’ she notes. Her bird-like eyes watch over your open chest to make sure they’ve fully cleared it out.

A single forget-me-not sprouts, and the Slender Man is the one who plucks it. Just like that, the flowers, their roots, all evidence you’d ever had life inside of you, is gone. Withered and wilted away.

The black hole takes all that you have to offer, and you are back to consciousness, no longer floating, no longer a home to the vibrancy of the universe.

What came after was a bit of a blur. The Slender Man had brought you back to the safe house you had called your home for the past year surprised to see that some of his favored children were still away, waiting for you as the light of the sun rose over the grass. It was a new dawn.

“How is she?” Hoodie asked, immediately springing up.

“Fixed,” was all the Slender Man said, his gaze shifting from you to your group’s leader. “Masky, I’m entrusting you to watch over her as you have been through something similar.”

“Of course,” the dark eyed man says as he takes you gingerly into his arms. “I wouldn’t trust her with anyone else.”

“One last thing,” the tall man in a suit hums. “I am taking Eyeless Jack from this house. Leia will stay with him.”

“It’s probably for the best. We trust your judgment,” Masky replies.

The Slender Man’s head gently cups Masky’s cheek before he leaves them with the sound of static that dissipates as fast as it appeared.

You spent the first few days after your surgery under bed rest. The Slender Man had healed you but he still worried for the state of your lungs. You needed the rest, and you were pleased to have it. Other than that, you felt… nothing. You were numb. Fleeting feelings of happiness or thankfulness, maybe something melancholic would slip through but ultimately, you were nowhere near your old self.

Jack was not allowed anywhere near you. That was one of the first instructions given to him when the Slender Man had popped into his head. While he did not have an opinion on Jack’s unfaithful behavior, he was more displeased with the fact he’d kickstarted the disease in you. The Slender Man thought that if he started it in Leia, then perhaps everything would turn out alright.

So, he sent the two out with a different group - which mostly meant Jeff, someone the Slender Man knew detested behavior that Jack had committed.

It was not easy for Jack to share the same space with Jeff after word had gotten out about you.

“You’re my best friend,” Jeff had sighed one late afternoon, refusing to even acknowledge Leia in the room. “But that? That was fucked up.”

Jack hummed and kept his gaze on Leia, who looked at him with nothing short of adoration. “Sure.”

Jeff sighed once more and stood up. “You don’t feel an inch bad, do you?”

“No.”

“You’re a shitty guy but you’re an even shittier liar.” Jeff broke the door with how hard he’d slammed it on his way out.

Jack really wasn’t the same, that much was apparent. He’d slowly been becoming more withdrawn and quicker to agitation. Of course, he’d take it out on whoever was around to deal with it. Leia included - it just came in a different form. One in which she’d never complained. But when things were rough between them, things were rough.

Jeff could hardly stand the two most days, so when he’d sneak out, it was with his dog to come pay a visit with you. And he hated how dull you had become.

“Masky used to be a lot more personable,” Jeff would say. “Life of the party when we could get him out of his pseudo-philosophical bullshit. Then he hurled flowers and we knew something was wrong.” Jeff’s hand rubs your back gently as a sign of friendship.

“And then?”

“Then he got that stupid surgery and now he’s just existing. No further purpose, just existing because some pale guy says so for his benefit.” Jeff huffed and looked up at the setting sun.

You found your gaze following his.

“What you’re doing right now,” he began. “It’s no way to live.”

“Would you have rather I’d succumbed to it?” You asked, not adding any inflection to whether you’re happy or sad, hurt or even offended.

“In all honesty?” Jeff tore his eyes from the pink and blue sky. “Yeah. This,” he gestured to you. “This isn’t you.”

Everything you’re supposed to feel feels dampened. Instead, you nodded. “Note taken.”

Jeff frowned.

The first time Jack was able to see you after your surgery was nearing halfway to what would have been seven months. It’d been a rough time without him seeing you, mostly because the guilt had been devouring every humanity he had left. Nothing could fill the void.

Like the first time you had met him, it was an accident when you crossed paths once again. You had been clearing out a house one fine winter’s evening, doing what had been asked of you before you got the faintest scent of something familiar and something you once recognized as comforting. You furrow your brows, weapon at your hip as you slowly and quietly come down the stairs.

Your lips are pressed into a thin line as you peer into the living room. Snow falls outside the window.

“Reader?” A male voice asks, turning around from the hallway. “Is that you?”

You tilt your head slightly as you register the mask you’re looking at. Eyeless Jack, mostly just known as ‘EJ’ or ‘Jack’. You’ve never really spent any time with him though outside of little jobs, so you have no idea who this is or why he sounds so happy to see you.

“Uh, hi, EJ?” You say as you walk at a leisurely pace down the stairs.

Jack freezes momentarily as he comes to greet you in the living room. He’d almost forgotten that when the flowers are removed, so too are the memories alongside feelings.”It’s… It’s good to see you,” he says as he looks down at you, wondering if he should touch you or not.

“I guess it’s nice to see you too,” you say. “What are you doing in this area?” You inquire. You vaguely remember the Slender Man not wanting you two to be in the same area.

“Just out and about,” he answers as he scratches at the back of his neck. “Leia wanted to uh, hunt down some of her sisters - I - it doesn’t matter,” he suddenly finishes, feeling much too awkward to even look at you. He knows you don’t remember, but he certainly does. Looking at you… He has a fresh slate.

“That’s nice,” you say in a tone that’s clearly disinterested. You walk towards the living room windows and look into what is now a cold winter’s night. You can see the snow still falling. If you want to make it back to Masky before he gets worried, you’ll need to head out almost immediately. “Pretty, isn’t it?”

Jack slowly comes to your side and puts his attention on you, watching as the snow continues to fall. “Yeah, the prettiest,” he says softly, desperately trying in vain to hold back on scooping you into his arms. There’s something scratching at the back of his throat.

You nod once again and zip up your coat. “They’re expecting me,” you say, gearing up to brave the snow.

“Do you need any-”

“No,” you cut him off. You’re not sure why it comes out so harshly, but you figure it must be a remnant of a memory you no longer have access to. “I can manage on my own.” You brush past him and open the front door, eyes momentarily clamping shut at how cold it is before you step onto the porch. The sound of the crunching snow is satisfying.

“Stay safe out there,” Jack says softly, not moving from his place as he continues to gaze out the window at the falling snow.

You turn your head briefly over your shoulder, “and you as well.”

Jack hears the door close and you walk off into the night, back to a group he was barred from. That tickling in the back of his throat grows more and more prevalent until he clears his throat. Feels like there’s something on his tongue. He coughs a few more times before holding his hands in front of his mouth, displeased to see the small blue petals he knows will bloom to full flowers in a time frame that is too long to be considered fair.

[babymilkawa]

Sorry if this has already been rone but- could I get Bakugou, Todoroki, Denki and Izuku (separately) with a non-binary s/o who’s quirk is based off of a hyena? They have splotches of lighter skintone on them, freckles, laugh like a hyena, have sharp teeth and eyes like them? And a tail + ears? S/o is really chaotic, they live by the motto “I’ll try anything once,” and are overall very likable yet funky? Extra points if the boys see them in their hero outfit (which is something a little showey💕

-🧸

this is rly interesting anon!!

hyena quirk headcanons with:

bakugou katsuki, todoroki shoto, midoriya izuku, kaminari denki

gn!reader :)

bakugou katsuki

so at first he was definitely ticked off by how different u were

tbh u kinda reminded him of Mina with ur personality

But he thought ur appearance was very cool

later on in ur relationship, you’d always feel him tracing the shapes of the splotches on ur skin, or softly scratching the space behind ur ears

he thought u looked so badass with those teeth though

u were wild but you weren’t careless

your attacks were precise and carefully planned during practice and he definitely noticed

even before u guys started dating, bakugou had already known almost everything about you just by observing

he noticed how your ears perked up easily

whether it’s excitement or during training

he loved watching how your pupils would dilate and how completely focused you’d look when on the battle field but if you’re just chilling?

your whole body is relaxed

oh and his favorite, favorite part is that if he teases you about things and you deny it, your tail will give it away

like your first kiss for example

he pulled away and with the smuggest grin he said, “not bad, right?”

you had rolled your eyes and looked away, unaware that the tip of your tail was rapidly moving side to side

Usually he’ll point you out

but after that kiss, he was dazed himself, so caught up on the feeling of ur lips, he didn’t even bother telling u that ur tail was betraying its owner

and the first time he saw ur hero costume? oh my g a w d man had to look away

cos damn what r u looking so good for 

literally has to slap himself when no one’s watching so he can focus on the task

todoroki shoto

so your personality is very different than his

knowing this, you sometimes try to catch him off guard by like fake pouncing on him 

but he never flinches or anything

never does

he prolly already knows ur planning this on the other side of the room smh

todoroki generally doesn’t have a playful side to him but when he’s noticing that you’re being more jumpy than usual he’ll join you cuz why not

but ofc it’s awkward at first

he doesn’t know how to have fun fun

he doesn’t understand ur impulsive decisions which happens a lot

for example, if you’ve accidentally had one sip of caffeine at 6 in the evening, you’re wide awake at 2 am and preparing to rearrange the furniture in ur dorm

he’s right below you, luckily, so he’ll hear all the noise and show up to ur dorm like “why?”

and you’ve got the same answer each time, “why not?”

he figures that he won’t be able to go back to sleep anyways so he helps you move the furniture

one thing that’s great is that he can instantly read your emotion or energy level from your tail

like if you’ve still got to move your night stand, but your tail is starting to droop, he’ll just drag you to bed

he’s tired too and he loves your cuddles even if ur ears tickle his chin a little excuse to be little spoon? I think yes

midoriya Izuku

your energy s c a r e s him sometimes

being ur partner during training will literally keep him fully alert, for you

but you’re a great partner, you can just be a little reckless sometimes

he soon learns that even if you dive right into the action, you don’t act without thinking

before you guys are even together, he’s already got your whole quirk analysis down in his notebook 

he’ll ask you questions about whether your tail gets in the way or whether your ears help during training and all

sometimes if you guys are just chilling, you’ll catch him staring at you

one day you ask him and he just goes like “no you just look really cool. I hope I'm not being weird though! I don’t mean to!”

“you’re my bf you can stare at me all you want Izuku”

one time, you were sitting down with your friends playing a card game and he was walking by behind you

but suddenly your tail just unconsciously swept the floor and he stepped on it, making you cry out in pain

he felt soooo bad

oml

doesn’t know how to help make it better so he just keeps on apologizing

if it was anybody else, you would’ve pounced on them but he looks genuinely guilty

so lets not make it worse :)

at first, seeing you smile would give him mixed emotions

like you’d go up to his face and flash your teeth and he’d start sweating buckets

you looked adorable don’t get me wrong

but you also looked a little...menacing

kinda like himiko

after a while he got used to it, knowing that you were a really kind person at heart

but since you can be a little wild and you like to have fun, you'll just graze his shoulder or neck with your skin to feel him shiver

you won’t put any pressure that’ll draw blood but it’s fun to hear him whimper 👀

the first time he saw ur hero costume, he start stuttering random nonsense lmAo

“y-y-y/n, wow, uhhh” sweat sweat sweat

yea he’s prolly not gonna get used to that hahHha

kaminari denki

this boy matches your energy

your always paired up with him during training cos you guys make the best team

like you’re there to keep him from making irrational decisions but you also ignite the fire and make sure the two of you make the most out of the time

even if you guys fail the mission sometime, you always come out laughing and developing new inside jokes

sometimes if you’re laughing, he’ll just turn to look at you with the biggest smile

and admires your tail wagging like a little pup and your teeth glistening under the ceiling lights

he is all up for your impulsive decision making

your #1 supporter

“oh? you wanna have fireworks in the field? me too! let’s go!”

pulls out 20 packs from under his bed

you two hold the best parties ever

and sometimes Iida gets on ur nerves but denki’s there to politely ask him to not be a party pooper and that the door is wide open 👀🚪

y’all get in trouble with Aizawa all the time 

like by now, he’s sick of y'all LMAOOO

someone told him that there’s a hole in the vending machine?

“y/n, Kaminari, come here”

but they weren’t even snitching on you two but it’s sooo obvious who did it hahaha

a lot of running around in the hallways and chasing each other

your so much faster than he is but he loves hearing your laugh echo the place

he clings on to you a lot cos ur soft

he’s usually the little spoon change my mind no u can't but when ur exhausted and all out of energy, he’s there to scratch your back or behind your ears, loving the way your tail wags in your sleep

you guys growl at each other

like playfully but it happens a lot

Midoriya walked in one time and lowk thought a fight was about to break down, tryna separate the two of you

you have an actual growl and a fake cute one, guess which one he likes ;))

a/n: aaah this was so fun to write!! thank you for requesting <33

bnha masterlist

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 294: A Half-Assed Escape

Previously on BnHA: Mirio was all “SURPRISE I’M BACK THANKS TO OUR RESIDENT SEVEN-YEAR-OLD WHO RECENTLY EARNED HER BACHELOR’S OF BEING A TOTAL BADASS.” Kacchan was all, “you know what, Dabi’s been trending long enough, time to remind the fandom what a real G looks like,” and he blasted his little bleeding body back into the fray and was all “FROM HERE ON OUT CALL ME DYNAMIGHT!!” Mirio was all, “AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... oh, you’re serious,” and Kacchan was all “!!”, and so that’s the story of how my son got murdered twice in one day. Meanwhile in the Todoroki Drama Zone, Deku was all “STOP MURDERING MY FRIEND” and Dabi was all “THAT’S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS” and fandom had a whole big debate about Whether Or Not Dabi Trying To Murder Deku’s Friends And Mentors Is Any Of Deku’s Business, which went exactly how you think it went. Anyway, so then Deku yelled at Dabi, and Endeavor was all moved by his manly words and randomly went to go uppercut Machia in the chin. And, seeing as how the Momoserum finally chose that exact moment to kick in, Machia is now down for the count.

Today on BnHA: The Miriosquad handles the Nearly High End Noumus, freeing up Jeanist to jasphyxiate (okay that one doesn’t really work so well) the rest of the League. Compress is all “TIME FOR THIS MILD-MANNERED SIDE CHARACTER VILLAIN TO SHINE”, except that by “shine” what he actually means is “use his quirk to punch a literal hole right through his own ass to free himself.” The rest of the chapter is basically just a back and forth between him and Jeanist, with Jeanist trying to recapture him, and Compress repeatedly thwarting him by chopping more holes out of himself because HE’S FRESH OUT OF FUCKS, AND THE ONES AT THE STORE ARE ALL SOLD OUT, MOTHERFUCKERS. Anyway, so with Compress basically dying and all, Horikoshi is all “you know what that means”, and delivers a freshly-baked villain flashback revealing that Compress is a descendant of Harima Ouji, a.k.a. the Peerless Thief, a.k.a. some famous guy whom Gentle mentioned this one time for like two seconds back in the day. The chapter ends with Compress finally demasking himself and dumping Tomura back onto the ground, a.k.a. The Worst Possible Place For Tomura To Be. ( •﹏•)

WHY IS CRUST HERE YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD

-- OH WAIT, SHIT. OH

AIZAWAAAA you’re alive and receiving medical help thank GOD. HOW MANY EYES DO YOU HAVE. AND MIRKO!! HOW MANY LIMBS DO YOU HAVE, OMG

so is this Aizawa dreaming about Crust’s final moments, then?? jesus. with All Due Respect to Crust’s memory, does Aizawa not already have enough misplaced guilt on his conscience as it is?? “nope, we’re gonna keep piling it on. that’s all he is now. three limbs, an indeterminate number of eyes, sexy hair, and Guilt” well shit

motherfucker y’all really out here placing an oxygen mask on Gran Torino’s corpse. fucking shounen characters. each one comes with a lifetime warranty

DAMN YOU HORIKOSHI WHY DO YOU KEEP SHOWING THESE CLOSE-UPS OF HAWKS’S UNCONSCIOUS FACE ALL WHUMPED OUT AND EXHAUSTED. HOW MUCH MORE OF THIS ARE WE GOING TO GET. ARE YOU PLANNING ON KILLING ME WITH THE UPCOMING CONVALESCENCE ARC, BECAUSE IF SO, AT LEAST HAVE THE DECENCY TO TELL ME AHEAD OF TIME SO I CAN MAKE A WILL

for a moment I considered going back and checking my previous recaps to count how many times I’ve already made a joke about Dabi’s fire incinerating Hawks’s wings but not touching so much as a hair on his five o’clock shadow, so that I could calculate whether or not I could possibly get away with making that same joke one more time. but then I realized I could just do it in this kind of roundabout way I’m doing right now instead. so there you have it

FFFFFFFMT LADY AND MIDNIGHT NOOOOO

PLEASE BE ALIVE. PLEASE RESPECT THE SIGN ON THE FRONT OF THE BUILDING. THE ONE THAT SAYS “NO LADY CHARACTERS ALLOWED TO DIE”, WITH THE FINE PRINT AT THE BOTTOM “AT LEAST NOT UNTIL HORIKOSHI GIVES US LIKE TWENTY-SIX MORE OF THEM FIRST IF THAT’S THE WAY HE WANTS TO PLAY IT.” IT’S A GOOD SIGN, PLEASE RESPECT ITS WISHES!!

so anyway though, Jeanist is giving a speech about how god knows how many people all worked together to bring Machia down. and now RHA is getting in on those fabric puns too, I see. “A SINGLE STRAND MAY BE THIN BUT TOGETHER THEY FORM A STRONG ROPE” oh so you think you guys are funny eh? I’m a frayed knot

MEANWHILE EXCUSE ME BUT WHY ARE YOU FUCKING CRYING BLOOD, HOLY SHIT

fffffff. so much for him taking over as the Number One once all this is over. so let’s just recap real quick, because Horikoshi has long since made it clear that one of his plot goals for this arc is to wipe out every single member of the Billboard Top Ten. so how we doin?

Endeavor - was just figuratively eviscerated in front of the entire nation by his homicidal zombiepunk son. also burnt half to death and possibly down a lung. will almost certainly be forced to retire after this one way or the other

Hawks - lying prettily in a medical tent. wings status: gone. hair status: still perfect

Jeanist - WELL I THOUGHT HE WAS FINE BUT APPARENTLY HE’S OUT HERE DYING, JESUS CHRIST

Edgeshot - MIA, last seen fighting Re-Destro. I really want him to have kicked RD’s ass because fuck that guy, but realistically they probably fought to a draw at best

Mirko - alive but in critical condition and missing something like 1.5 limbs

Crust - dead, currently haunting Aizawa’s traumatized dreams. now he’s gonna be triggered the rest of his life by people giving him the thumbs up, THANKS A LOT

Kamui Woods - was set on fire which is His Weakness. thoughts and prayers

Wash - last seen floating hospital patients to safety as Tomura’s wave of decay descended towards him. probably dead ffff

Old Man Samurai - haven’t seen this fucker in a hot minute, who even knows where he’s wandered off to

Ryuukyuu - currently being treated for her wounds, looked pretty bad off. but it’s hard to tell how hurt she is since most of the injuries were acquired in her transformed state. SHE BETTER GET WELL SOON

anyways, so yeah. so much for the top ten. guess that’s another reason Horikoshi brought Mirio back now, huh

so there’s a big panel of everyone fighting the Noumu while Machia lies there all “blurgh.” good riddance my dude. it took like twenty chapters and a hundred people to stop this guy so I really fucking hope he stays down. you’ve had your fun

anyway so Jeanist is sending another steel thread towards Dabi! and he’s all “just a bit more!!” fklklj this is gonna go real well isn’t it

meanwhile Mirio’s fighting a Nearly High End with all of these weird rock formations jutting out of its skin. go on and kick his ass then, Mirio

“each of these guys is probably just as strong as the Noumu from Kyuushuu” hold on I thought Ujiko or Tomura or someone said that wasn’t the case? not that Mirio would know I suppose. anyways let’s just hope he’s wrong cuz if not these kids are probably screwed

kLSDKFHLSKHGLKLK OH MY GODDDD

IIDA FUCKING TENYA YOU’RE A PEACH. THINKS THE NAME IS OUTRAGEOUS, CHECK. USES IT ANYWAY, CHECK. “JUST BECAUSE I DON’T UNDERSTAND DOESN’T MEAN I CAN’T BE SUPPORTIVE.” WHAT A CLASS ACT

AND KACCHAN IS RESPONDING WITH AS MUCH DIGNITY AS HE CAN MUSTER

WOW, SON. IT’S ALMOST AS THOUGH YOU HAVE A HOLE IN YOUR TORSO, OR SOMETHING!! although listen up, real talk, the fact that Kacchan of all people can’t muster the energy to yell at someone questioning his ability to kick ass is HIGHKEY troubling and we may be in need of an intervention here soon :/

now Jeanist is finally turning his attention to the League! was... was it not already on the League. omg

ACTUAL SCREAMING AHHHHHH FUCK FUCKLK LK AHHLKHKFFFF

hey so um. what the actual fucked up hell. my soul left my body. imagine if you saw the reflection of this panel on your bedroom window. you would never sleep again

OKAY RHA TRANSLATORS ARE YOU HAVING YOURSELF A LAUGH AGAIN

THIS CANNOT BE WHAT HE’S ACTUALLY SAYING RIGHT. BUT IT’S RIGHT IN THAT UNCANNY VALLEY OF NOT BEING QUITE SURE, THOUGH... (　ﾟдﾟ)

(ETA: just a next-day clarification here, apparently my sleep-deprived ADHD word-skipping brain completely skipped right over the “a” in that last panel, so what I read was, “and Shigaraki’s limp noodle.” so yeah, the moral of this story is always read the speech bubble carefully before you start making running jokes throughout the rest of your post, folks.)

oh wow he’s really freaking out lmao

to be fair though, I’d argue that Dabi has gotten pre-tty close at this point :’) thrilled for him, really I am

but anyway, well then figure something out you big dramatic robot-armed fiend. didn’t you just say you could touch your own ass? can you not just Compress yourself to break free?? does it not work on you? or would you be stuck afterwards lol

(ETA: I was picturing him compressing his entire body at once, not just chunks of it. ghhhlkh.)

um

holy shit Jeanist. are you stupidly trying to cut off their air, or are you going for more of a sleeper hold (jleeper hold??) thing instead. the latter would be way smarter and faster and probably safer as well just saying

but unless Spinner is just being super dramatic, it sure looks like he’s fucking strangling them djslkjlk. this will certainly cement his popularity among the villain stans. good thing you’re not running for office any time soon bud

anyway so I have no idea what these guys are trying to do now. what is this

do you even have till the count of 5 at this rate. I mean

OH MY GOODNESS

HE’S REALLY FUCKING DOING IT!! HE’S COMPRESSING HIS BUTT!! OMFG. TOMURA HIDE YOUR NOODLE!!!

WHAT THE FUCK

DID YOU COMPRESS A PIECE OF YOUR OWN ASS. FUCKING WHAT. PUT THIS MAN’S PICTURE IN THE DICTIONARY NEXT TO THE WORD “LOYALTY”, HOLY CRAP

HOLY SHIT COMPRESS

“HOLY SHIT DID THAT GUY JUST PUNCH A HOLE THROUGH HIS OWN ASS IN ORDER TO SAVE HIS VILLAIN PALS. FUCK IT, HE DESERVES TO ESCAPE”

jeez, talk about... A HALF-ASSED ESCAPE ATTEMPT :D :D :D hahaha. but real talk though, Horikoshi has clearly never tried to leap twelve feet straight up in the air multiple times in succession with only half his glutes though. everyone, I regret to inform you that this panel right here on the left may be slightly unrealistic

also where the hell is he going to go?? did you pack a jetpack away in one of those little marbles sir. and what about Dabi?? and Skeptic too, I guess, but we don’t really care about Skeptic

(ETA: at this point I had to stop reading for about two hours because I had to go out and take care of something; that’s also why this is being posted later than usual lol. anyways so where were we.)

oh my lord

the existence of a translator’s note here implies that the earlier line about Compress being able to reach Tomura’s junk was not, in fact, ad-libbed. hmm. hmmmmmmmm

anyway so now he’s grabbing Compress again because OF COURSE HE IS, so now we’re right back to square one! except now Tomura and Spinner are secured inside of little marbles, and presumably Compress is the only one who can release them

oh nevermind he’s just maiming himself again instead, SHEESH

Skeptic a man is dying please have some goddamn respect

so, uh. is he gonna die, though??

I really can’t tell wtf is going on here, this is the most confusing the art has been in a while. Horikoshi put all of his spoons into that creepyass close-up panel earlier, that bastard

OMG WHAT ARE YOU SERIOUS

DON’T FUCKING TELL ME THE “COMPRESS IS RELATED TO THIS THIEF GUY FROM OLDEN TIMES” THEORY IS ACTUALLY TRUE WHAAAAAAT. OH SHIT

so apparently Harima was a Robin Hood type guy who stole from... heroes?? wtf. are heroes the 1% in this scenario. y’all didn’t have any Fortune 500 CEOs to steal from?

THAT’S THE BLOOD THAT FLOWS THROUGH YOU, OH SHIT. and in a related oh shit, the fact that we are getting a Compress flashback now of all times doesn’t bode super well for him. ffff

MEANWHILE THE TODOROKIS ARE STILL TODOROKI-ING

listen here boy if you touch one freaking hair on Shouto’s candy cane head I swear to god --

WHAT DID I FUCKING SAY!!!

SHOUTO NOOOOOO. WTF YOU’RE LITERALLY THE ONE GUY WHOSE WEAKNESS IS ABSOLUTELY NOT SUPPOSED TO BE FIRE. DABI YOU SHIT, YOU BETTER WATCH YOURSELF!! I’M PRINTING OUT A COPY OF THAT COMPRESS PANEL!!! KEEP AN EYE OUT ON THAT BEDROOM WINDOW YOU PUNK!!!

SO NOW POOR SHOUTO IS UNCONSCIOUS AND FALLING!! SOMEONE SAVE HIM!! WHO CATCHES THE CATCHER

COMPRESS LITERALLY HOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE RIGHT NOW, WHAT IS HAPPENING

PLEASE DON’T CALL TOMURA LEADER OF THE “PLF” YOU KNOW I CAN’T TAKE IT SERIOUSLY WHEN YOU DO THAT. ARE YOU DYING. ARE YOU JUST A FUCKING HEAD NOW WTF

(ETA: “masks are removable, makeste” you know what it’s been a long day okay lmao. or I suppose Compress is really the one who is lmao.)

GASPPPPPP

okay. okay. looooool okay then

WHY WERE YOU COVERING THIS SEXY MOP OF HAIR UNDER THAT HOOD YOU TOOL. IT WOULD HAVE LOOKED SO GOOD WITH THE TOP HAT. I’M SO MAD AT YOU RIGHT NOW

as if it wasn’t enough for him to demask himself, he also had to get all shirtless and then do this weird attempt at a sexypose too huh

hard to say exactly how much of his torso is currently missing, but safe to say that’s proooooooobably not good. :///// fuck

on the other hand, Kacchan also has a torso hole and he’s still flying around like he just drank a dozen red bulls, so

this man lost his ass and he’s still out here monologuing like it’s the last two minutes of The Prestige. one might say he is monologuing his ass off

so he let Spinner and Tomura free, but is Dabi still trapped in his marble?? wasn’t he all on fire and stuff?? hopefully he can still turn off his quirk in there because if not that’s a pretty fucked up way to die. somewhere out there Snatch’s ghost is all “YEAH I’LL SAY.” oh how the turntables

last but not least, sooooooo. Tomura. back on the ground. that’s. um. ...shiiiiiiiit

[prettyboybarzal]

Dancing With Our Hands Tied (7)

Word Count: 3.1k

Warnings: Phone sex, daddy kink, masturbation

A/N: Let me know what y’all thank! :) ILY

Previous Chapter // Masterlist

You were on a date.

And Pierre was all the way across the country, in a hotel bed, next to Josh Anderson.

He wouldn’t have even known you were getting wined and dined by his next door neighbor if Josh hadn’t opened your Snapchat while he was sitting right beside him. Charlie was sitting across the table from you, smiling like a nerd over his filet mignon. 

The scoff that came out of Pierre’s mouth as a reaction piqued Josh’s attention.

“Oh, we’re fighting again?”

“We never stopped,” he grumbled, standing from the bed.

“No? You’ve been sort of civil lately.”

“That’s because I haven’t been around her, so I haven’t had to deal with her attitude.”

“Smile.” Pierre turned on a dime and flipped off Josh’s camera as soon as the flash lit up the room. Josh smiled down at the photo and murmured, “YN will love that picture.”

---

It was Josh’s damn Snapchat that did you in.

It was Pierre’s long middle finger and his unamused expression, the sweats that hung low on his hips that did nothing to hide the bulge hidden beneath the waistband. You were glad that you opened it after Charlie ran to the bathroom because you were 100% sure that you were blushing.

It’d only been a week since you last saw Pierre, but the time apart had you feeling needy. You’d never admit it out loud, but you needed him. 

You needed Pierre. 

“I was thinking,” Charlie spoke as he arrived back at the table. You stood, gathering your phone and your purse as his hand slid along your lower back. “Let’s grab a bottle of wine from the liquor store down the block and then finish it off at my place.”

“Um,” you hesitated, lifting your phone to check the time. It wasn’t even late, but you didn’t want to go home with him. “Charlie, I think I should get home.

“We can totally go back to your place.”

“No! I mean, I need to be alone,” you corrected. He looked at you, dumbfounded. “I’m just feeling super bloated and exhausted.”

“Did I do something wrong?”

“No! No, come on, you know that,” you urged, fake smile on your lips as you slid your hand in his to lead him out to the car. “Dinner was amazing and this restaurant is beautiful. I wish I was feeling better, I really do. I’ll make it up to you.”

---

Pierre knew he was in trouble when your name flashed across his phone screen just before he went to bed. He sat up against the headboard and picked up immediately, desperate to know how your date went.

“Hi, Luc,” you spoke as soon as he accepted the call. He felt a chill run down his spine at the sound of your voice, at the name falling from your lips. “I miss you,” you whispered like it was a secret. He smiled at your words, feeling his heart skip a beat, and then you moaned, “My pussy misses you.” 

And just like that, all his qualms about you being out with Charlie disappeared, if only temporarily.

He sucked in a deep breath and dropped his head back against the headboard, a groan ripping through his chest as he spoke, “YN, don’t do this to me right now.”

“Why not, baby?”

“You’re not being fair.”

“Would you rather I touch myself without you on the phone?”

“Fuck no!” he exclaimed. “No, no, that would--fuck--that would be torture.” 

“Then, talk to me.”

He loved the sound of your voice, low and sultry. You could read him the phone book and he’d probably still get off. 

“Are you touching yourself?” he asked, voice deepening to meet your level. You hummed affirmatively, a bit whiny as your fingers slid along your folds. “Good girl.” His fingers slipped beneath the waistband of his sweats. “What are you wearing, angel?”

“Do you want to see?”

“Of course I do.”

You smiled happily to yourself, pulling your fingers from your folds to kneel on the bed and take a photo in the mirror you’d set up in front. The first was posed with your knees apart on the bed, hand on your breast, and the next, you slipped those fingers into your lace panties and inserted them into your cunt. Pierre could hear you moan and sat up impatiently.

“Don’t tease me.”

“Patience.”

You scrambled back up to the pillows and sent him the photos, listening in for the reaction you desperately needed. 

“Fuck, you’re so fucking sexy. I wish I could fuck you right now,” he spoke. You whimpered, fingers massaging your folds. “That mirror doesn’t belong there,” he pointed out. “You moved it?”

“Yes, daddy,” you responded, tugging your bottom lip between your teeth. Pierre cursed beneath his breath at the name, fingers curling around the base of his cock. “Wanted to watch when I fuck myself to your voice.”

“Fuuuuck,” he sighed. “I want you naked.”

You slipped your thong down your legs and unclasped your bra to toss it on the floor. He rid himself of his sweats as well

“And then what?”

“Spread your legs for me.”

“Are you touching yourself, too?” you asked, voice soft and sweet in contrast to the filth that was coming from both your mouths. Pierre chuckled.

“‘Course I am,” he spoke. “I’ve been touching myself since you sent me those photos.”

“You’re cheating!”

“Am not,” he responded with another laugh. “I’m waiting for you, just a little impatiently.” And then he heard a loud moan fall from your lips. “What are you doing, baby? Talk to me.”

“I’m catching up to you,” you answered breathlessly. You had a finger in your cunt, curling to hit your g-spot slowly. Each time, another whimper graced his ears. “Do you know why I really put this mirror here?”

“Hmm?”

“Because I can’t stop thinking about the night you fucked me in the bar bathroom,” you moaned, adding a second finger to your pussy. His breath faltered on the other end of the call. “I think about the way you watched me come undone in the mirror, the look in your eyes, every time I touch myself.”

“You’re so fucking sexy when you cum,” he whispered. “It’s like a dream. I love the way your pussy throbs around me, the way you sigh my name and close your eyes and arch your back.” He paused. “Circle your clit with your thumb, baby, the way I do.”

As soon as you added the pressure to your clit, you sucked in a breath, legs bending at the knee to grant you better access and a clearer view of what you were doing.

“I wish you were watching me right now, knowing you can’t touch me.”

“C’mon, YN, you know that you can’t stop me from touching you.”

“But I sort of am right now,” you reminded him. A loud moan ripped through your chest, somewhat performative to get a rise out of him. “Maybe I don’t need you after all.”

“You need me enough to call me after going out to dinner with Charlie,” he grunted. “Isn’t that right? You couldn’t go home with him because you were too busy thinking about me? Thinking about the way I make you feel?” 

Without even really working for it, you got the energy you wanted out of him. Pierre’s jealousy always did it for you and you could feel the subtle shake of your legs as he asked you, “Did you buy that set for him? You wanted him to take that off tonight?”

“No, I only want you to touch me. Only want you to undress me. Only want you to fuck me.”

“Fuck,” he grunted, head thrown back against his headboard. His hand was moving quicker now and he was finding it hard to speak through the moans that threatened to fill the air. “Tell me what you want me to do to you when I get home, angel. Whatever you want.”

“I want you to fuck me against every surface in our apartments,” you told him, picking up the pace of your fingers to match the sound of his hand on his member. “I want you to fuck me against the walls and the windows, and I want you to fuck me in the bathroom mirror like the slut I am for you, like the night at the bar.”

“You gonna scream my name? Make sure Charlie knows who fucks you this good?”

“Yes, Pierre, yes, yes,” you moaned, fingers hitting the right spot as he speaks to you. Every circle of your clit had you convulsing. “I-I’m so close.”

“Hold on a few more seconds,” he requested. “You’re gonna cum with me, okay, baby?”

You released a string of moans and whimpers in place of words as you continued coaxing your orgasm, and you listened to Pierre’s praises and quickened breath as he got close to his own high. 

“Give it to me, daddy, please, fuck!”

Your back arched off the bed, fingers working furiously on your cunt as he breathed in your ear, whispering praises, “So good for me. You wanna cum?” You whimpered, nodding as if he could see it. “Go ahead, baby, cum.”

You finally found your release, shouting his name into the speaker as your legs shook and your body squirmed. Your pussy fluttered as you fucked yourself through the orgasm, catching sight of yourself in the mirror to see what Pierre said he loved to see and you listened to him come undone, the sweet sound of your name on his tongue.

---

The morning after dinner with Charlie and phone sex with Pierre, you felt hungover. You weren’t even drunk the night before, but you still woke up in discomfort with a mix of guilt and anxiety and a dash of regret. So, after pulling yourself from bed, you opened the blinds in hopes that the vitamin D would do you some good.

Saturdays, in your opinion, always felt like your most productive day of the week. And, since last Saturday was commandeered by your parents and Pierre, you were dedicating this one completely to yourself. Your breakfast was slamming, your speakers were playing some feel good tunes, and you were going to spend the day tidying up and spend the night watching Netflix.

But all your self-indulgent plans came to a screeching halt when your phone started ringing and Sadie’s name flashed across the screen.

You didn’t speak to Sadie after Pierre spent your birthday with your parents because you knew she’d blow it out of proportion. She managed to do so through text, typing in all caps to let you know that mom told her Pierre was shirtless in your kitchen.

“I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to get you on the phone,” she barked as you as soon as you accepted the call. Her voice rang through the speaker, shattering the comfortable silence you’d once had. “You’re avoiding me.”

“I am not.”

“Yeah, you are,” she argued. “And I know why.”

“Oh, yeah? Why?”

“You’re in love with him.”

You dropped a plate in the sink, suds splashing up into your face as you scrambled to turn the faucet off and dry your hands. You were going to get into it with her.

“I’m not in love with you him! Where would you even get that idea? He was shirtless in my kitchen because we slept together the night before and I was in the process of kicking him out.”

“Mom swore there was no way you were just sleeping together,” she grunted. “What does that make him? Your enemy with benefits?”

“That makes him a booty call.”

“He spent the day with mom and dad,” she pointed out. “That’s more than just a booty call.”

“He did it to taunt me. Have you forgotten the whole basis of our drama?”

“And did it work?” she asked. “Did he taunt you? Or did you enjoy his presence?”

“Sadie, it’s just sex,” you sighed, exhausted by her line of questioning. “We hardly even know each other. We’ve never even had a real conversation without hurling insults at each other and we’ve never voluntarily seen each other without the promise of sex.” You paused. “Besides, I went out to dinner with Charlie last night.”

“Oh, fuck, you’re still entertaining him?” she asked. You hummed affirmatively, preparing for her onslaught of words about how mismatched the two of you really are. “I don’t get it. Can you explain it to me like I’m five?”

“You wouldn’t understand, Sadie,” you sighed. “I know he might be a little boring sometimes, but he’s a nice guy with a stable job and a stable life. And he always goes the extra mile when he’s trying to impress me. Last night, he took me out to this expensive restaurant I’ve been dying to go to.”

“And you had fun on your little date?” she asked, condescending tone to her voice. You rolled your eyes.

“Yeah, it was good.”

“Did he make you laugh?”

“Yes.”

“He paid?”

“Of course.”

“And you went home with him after?” she finally asked. You didn’t want to tell her that you left him to call Pierre. That would be the final nail in your coffin. So, your answer was a long pause. “You had this man take you to dinner and you didn’t even put out after?” She scoffed. “And you say you like him!”

“I wasn’t in the mood.”

“Why?” she pried. “Because he isn’t Pierre Luc Dubois?”

Your stomach dropped.

“Would you stop saying his name like that?”

“I think you’re in denial,” Sadie declared. “And I know that you’re going to be like ‘what does my little sister even know about love?’ To that I answer, almost nothing. But, I do know quite a lot about you. You don’t want boring, YN. You haven’t been boring a day in your life, so why would you settle for someone who doesn’t drive you absolutely crazy, you know?”

“The type of crazy Pierre makes me isn’t a cute crazy. It’s a should-be-admitted type of crazy.”

“More like a ‘I’ll kiss you to shut you up’ kind of crazy.”

You couldn’t argue that.

“Whatever, Sadie, I don’t know what else to say,” you goaned. “Can we change the subject now?”

She agreed to let it go, though you knew it wouldn’t be long until she was bugging you about him again, and conversation to whatever was going on in Sadie’s life. But, as much as you’d wanted to change the subject, suddenly not even a different conversation could get your mind off Pierre.

---

When Pierre got back to Ohio, he was itching to get to your apartment and make all the things you said over the phone come true, but you weren’t even answering his texts. It’s not like you texted all that much to begin with, but when you didn’t ask him to come over after his flight landed, he knew something was up. Now, he had four unanswered texts in your messages from the past two days and he was yearning for your attention. 

Needless to say, he was off, and the entire team could tell.

Especially Josh. He noticed almost as soon as he saw Pierre, but he waited until practice was over to begin prying.

“Where’s your head at?” he asked.

“Hmm?”

“You look like your head is somewhere else.”

“It is.”

His answer was simple as he left for the showers, and Josh wasn’t straggling far behind, determined to get the answers he was searching for. After showering, they headed out to their cars and said goodbye, but Josh watched Pierre pull out of the lot and turn in the opposite direction of his apartment. So, he made the decision to tail him.

Imagine his surprise when Pierre traveled deeper into the city towards your apartment. He followed him the whole way, stopping at the corner of your block to avoid being seen while Pierre parked. And then, with his jaw practically on the floor, Josh watched him jog right into your building.

 ---

“What’s your problem?” Pierre barked the second you opened the door. His tone of voice was harsh, not soft like it’d been in recent weeks, and it immediately threw you off. “Are you on your period or something? Because it’s alright if you are. I’d be down for period sex.”

You slammed the door in his face.

He was joking. Well, he was trying to joke, like an idiot, and obviously not succeeding. So, he took a step back to gather his thoughts and tried again.

“That was an awful joke. Let me start over,” he spoke as soon as you opened the door again. You cocked your hip against the doorframe with your arms crossed over your chest. “Did I do something wrong? Is that why you’re not talking to me?”

“No, other than your usual annoying shit, you’ve been fine.”

“So, what’s going on? Why haven’t you been answering my texts?”

You rolled your neck with a groan and answered, “It’s just been a crazy week, Pierre,” you paused, glaring at him. “And, yes, I’m also on my period, not that it concerns you.”

“I hate when you call me Pierre,” he grunted and although you rolled your eyes, those words stirred something inside of you. “Can I come in?”

To his surprise, you stepped aside without contest and continued into the apartment leaving him to kick his shoes off and drop his jacket on the hook at the door. He found you curled up beneath a chunky blanket with the remainders of some fast food meal on the coffee table. He dropped onto the other end, kicked his socked feet up on the table, and smiled at you.

“Seriously, why are you here?” you asked. “I’m not having period sex with you.”

“I said that was a joke.”

“Okay, then why are you here if not for sex?” you asked, face twisted in frustration. 

His face mirrored yours as he responded, “Is it such a crime to just want to see you?”

“Yes,” you answered simply.

“Does it have to be?”

Although the question was loud enough for you to hear, it was soft enough to ignore if you felt it necessary. So, you ignored it, because you didn’t do this. You didn’t just hang out to see each other. He huffed as you began sifting through the collection of romantic comedies on Netflix. 

“I’m watching a movie, so either you stay and watch, or you leave.”

Pierre grabbed a pillow and dropped it onto the middle cushion of the couch before laying back, his feet elevated over the arm at the end of the couch. You followed his direction, dropping a pillow in front of his and throwing your feet over the other arm so that you’d be lying head-to-head. Before laying down, you gave him a blanket and wrapped another around your own body.

The movie began and the opening credits rolled, but you couldn’t focus.

How could you when Pierre was in your apartment and not tearing your clothes off? How could you focus when you’d so easily enabled the domestic scene laid out in front of you?

His hand hung limply off the edge of the couch and just looking at it made you feel all types of things. You could practically feel his skin on your skin and your mind began to wander, daydreaming about what it might be like to lace your fingers with his. And, before you could stop yourself, you were placing your palm against his palm to do just that.

[dilucatic]

character : kaeya

request : hello! sage, right? that's such a lovely name! ^^ i saw you wanted requests so here i am, in all my glory!! anyways, i would like to request a bittersweet scenario with kaeya :D the plot is really up to you but as long as there is a n g s t and some fluffy bits it'd be great! have a wonderful rest of the week, love! signed, camellia (not my real name but it's my fave flower!!)

notes : hihi :D gahh tysm :( camellia’s a really pretty name as well !! i’m so sorry this took so long !! i kept starting and restarting and agh </3 so much word vomit how to angst

minor spoilers for kaeya’s background !!

the light of day was just starting to loom over mondstadt by the time kaeya started pulling his clothes on to attend to his usual tasks as cavalry captain. day after day he’d go out in the early hours of the morning only to return home well past sundown. it wasn’t easy, coming home countless nights with sore muscles and droopy eyes. even then, he’d still find it within himself to come back to you with open arms and an exhausted smile.

kaeya turned back towards your shared bed. you were now leaning in the direction of his side, a hand resting on the empty sheets of his side. a few weeks ago he might’ve considered spending a few more minutes in bed with you in hopes of being the first thing you wake up to. he pressed a soft kiss to your brow, turning on his heel to head out the door. he felt sorry to leave you behind yet again. lately it seemed as though he wasn't spending as much time with you as he should’ve been. it saddened him, but he figured that it couldnt be helped. kaeya had his own responsibilities, as did you.

with how busy he had been as of late, there was no time left to shower you in fleeting compliments. no time left to indulge in the warmth of your arms. no time left to simply be yours.

he should’ve known from the beginning. kaeya wasn’t in the position to love as carelessly as he had been. a knight of favonius, and a captain at that. not to mention his past shrouded in secrecy. everyone in mondstadt loved the kaeya they were familiar with; the kaeya he carefully crafted for them to see. telling white lies was second nature to him. telling them to you was no different. 

communication wasn’t his strong suit. he was too afraid to tell the truth of his past, too afraid to let you in, too afraid of what the future had in store for mondstadt. kaeya lived his life burdened by lie upon lie. he was too far in, there was no way he could just let go of the lies he'd fed you up until then. 

the last time he decided to be upfront about the truth, it ended with his relationship with his brother in shambles. he couldn’t bring himself to meet that same end with you. not yet, maybe not ever. would you feel betrayed ? hurt by the reality of your lover being a mere facade of the person hidden underneath ?

as much as he reveled in spending time with you, holding you, touching you, having you, kaeya was well aware of the inevitable end. he was a fool to fall so deeply in the first place. one moment he’d be brushing strands of your hair behind your ear, swooning at the way you’d react to his advances. the next he’d be damning himself for falling victim to your charms so seamlessly.

maybe it was his own selfish desires forcing him to stay in your hold. it was pathetic almost, the way he shamelessly indulged in the innocent love you’d offer, unaware of the burdens constantly gnawing away at the back of his mind. guilt consumed him every time he found himself easing you with a new set of lies.

someday he’d have to get away. kaeya wasn’t sure if it would be to save you or to save himself. surely nothing good would come out of stringing you along with false hope and sweet promises to be broken.

and yet, he’d still find himself enamored by you. a small part of him stayed bitter, knowing that the facade he put up for you was the same as he’d put up for everyone else. he found it rather interesting, the way he could bring people into the palm of his hand by the work of a few well articulated words.

he was corrupt from the inside out. he was well aware of it too. who was he to taint someone like you with such deceitfulness ? being with you was more than enough to make him sneer at his own cowardness. he was too secretive, too scared of consequences even with you by his side. you, the very person putting your trust in him even with him being unable to return the trust.

guilt seems to follow kaeya wherever he goes. it just might just be what brings him to finally push you way for once and for all. 

[sub-hoshi-enthusiast]

I’m back with another idea!!😆😆 could you do sth like overstim/degradation with a hint of manhandling for Hyunjin or Changbin?? Plz and thank you❤️❤️

I know that this one took awhile so I'm sorry for the long wait but I hope you like it! I decided to write it for Changbin since I haven't written anything for him yet and I already have something for Hyunjin.

⚠️Warnings⚠️: sub!Changbin, fem!dom!reader, mommy kink, degradation, overstimulation, a hint of manhandling, use of toys (vibrating plug), masturbation, and a lil bit of spanking.

See You at Home~

If you could use one word to describe yourself in this moment, it would be bored. Very bored. You had finished up everything you needed to do for the day and most everything you needed for tomorrow. Even so, you still had to sit in a boring, empty, office, waiting for someone to finish doing some paperwork to run up to you. The room itself was nice and spacious with a large window as the back wall so you had the perfect view of the city as well as a small wall of books (one that you had specifically requested to be put in). For some reason though, you just didn't feel like reading today, so you decided to watch some interviews of your boyfriend and his bandmates instead. 

     You were giggling at a random comment when a texting notification popped up on your screen. You smiled to yourself as you saw who it was. Speak of the devil. You had forgotten that Changbin was free for the day so you didn't text him, thinking you wouldn't get a reply. You tilted your head in slight confusion as you saw what he had sent you. It was a video that was about a minute long, sent with the simple message 'Make sure you're wearing headphones ;)'. The  thumbnail was just a black screen so you couldn't tell what it was about.

     You opened one of your desk drawers, pulling out a pair of headphones and plugging them into your phone. A few seconds into the video and your mouth went dry as a whimper filled your ears. He was face down in your bedsheets, facing the camera with his ass in the air. He had moved your body mirror so you could clearly see the vibrating buttplug he had shoved in his hole. One hand was desperately clutching the sheets next to him as the other pumped his cock, which you also noticed had a cockring around it. He was whimpering and whining into the mic, making arousal shoot through your body at the submissive sounds that flooded your ears. 

     "M-mommy~! Ngh- I missed you s-so much. I've been teasing myself for s-o long so I could be hard for you when y-you got home, but…" his words trailed off as he bit his already swollen lips. "I really wanna cum mommy! A-ah- it just feels too damn good!" You gripped your phone harder, knuckles turning white as you stare intently at the screen. He sat up, whimpering as the plug pushed deeper inside of him from the action and slowly removed the cockring. As soon as the object had been removed, he began stroking his cock at a much faster pace than he had before. "AH! Ohh- I've been thinking about you all day mommy! T-thinking about you p-pounding me into the mattress as I scr-eam for you! Oh god! Want you to t-tie me up and use me! Use me like I'm your own personal t-toy! Ngh- Oh god! - Cum! Cumming! G-gonna - A-AH!" You bit your lip as you watched his body tense up before thick ropes of white covered his hand and his stomach. He slowed down his strokes before stopping completely, giggling cutely as he grabbed the remote for the plug to turn it off. "See ya at home mommy~." He said before blowing a kissing to the camera and the screen went black.

     You stared blankly at the screen in front of you for a few minutes, clutching it tightly as thousands of thoughts clouded your mind. You snapped back to reality after you heard a small knock on the wooden doors to your office. You took out your earbuds, setting your phone down as you called for whoever it was to enter. Your secretary opened the door, arms full of paperwork. With the files secure in your office, that was your que to leave. 

-

     Changbin was standing in the kitchen, heating up popcorn for your weekly movie night when you walked in. The door slammed behind you, making him jump in surprise. A wide grin spread across his face as soon as he saw you, shuttering as he saw the dark look in your eyes.

     "Welcome home mommy! I was just working on-" He cut himself off with a quiet gasp as you slammed him against the counter, his back digging into the marble as you pressed your body to his.

     "What the hell was that? Did you think you were being cute?" You asked in a deep, raspy voice that you knew he loved. He shyly looked to the floor, the tips of his ears turning a bright red.

     "I-I'm sorry mommy." He claimed, but you could see the small smile making its way onto his face. You gripped his thighs tightly, making him whimper. You quickly spun him around, gripping his hair tightly and bending him over. He whined loudly, squirming in your grip as you landed a harsh slap to his ass. You pulled down his pants and boxers, ready to spank him again when you noticed something. Anger flared in you as you saw that he was still wearing the plug from the video. You yanked his head up by his hair so you could growl in his ear.

     "So this is how it's gonna be, huh? What the hell has gotten into you? Usually you're so good for me Binnie, what happened?" He bit his lip with a whimper, turning his eyes to look at you.

     "I-I - It's just - you haven't fucked me in so long! I just wanted to get mommy's attention." He whined out, squirming in your grip. You scoffed at his answer. He was kidding right?

     "If I remember correctly baby, I fucked you a little over a week ago, didn't I? Are you really such a filthy cockslut you can't go that long without mommy's cock pounding into you?" He moaned, grinding his hips back into yours.

     "Y-yes mommy! I-I'm such a slut for you! I can't live without mommy's cock destroying me! Please mommy~!" Your hand that wasn't in his hair gripped his hip tightly to stop them from grinding into you, making him whine. You pushed his head down so his cheek was pressed against the cold countertop.

     "I'm gonna go grab something, so don't move or I'm not gonna even think about touching you." He whined in slight aggravation as you disappeared but stayed still nonetheless. You weren't surprised to see most of your toys laid out on the bed already. You rolled your eyes, picking up the control for the plug, taking your time with putting away the other toys your boyfriend had laid out. You smiled once you had entered, happy to see Changbin still bent over the counter where you left him.

     "So you can listen?" He nodded enthusiastically, turning to look at you.

     "Wanna be a good boy for mommy." You had to hold back from laughing at his statement.

     "I think it's too late for that baby." You hummed, twirling the remote in your hand before turning it to the lowest setting. Changbin shuttered, whimpering at the sensation. You smirked at his reaction, pushing his thin t-shirt farther up his back so you could press open mouthed kisses up his spine. You bit down on the base of his spine, leaving a mark as you reached for the ring at the base of the plug. A loud whine left his lips when you pulled it out slightly, but was immediately followed by a gasp as you harshly thrusted it back into him. Submissive noises continued to flow from his lips as you harshly thrusted the plug in and out of him. He suddenly let out a loud gasp followed by a high pitched moan.

     "O-Oh fuck! Mommy! R-right there!" He whimpered as his arms reached out to grab anything, eventually deciding on gripping the opposite edge of the counter. You smirked down at him, chuckling at his disheveled state.

     "What's the matter Binnie? You were so confident in your little video earlier, so what's the problem?" He whined, squirming against the counter as his thighs started to shake from how close he was to his release. 

     "I-I'm sorry m-mommy! I- AH - I-I really am! Mommy! I w-wanna cum! N-need to cum so bad!" You raised your eyebrow, scoffing at his statement. 

     "You need to? But you came earlier, didn't you? I remember you cumming all over my sheets like a filthy slut because you couldn't wait for me to get home." You growled down at him, digging your nails into the flesh of his hips. He whimpered loudly, trying to grind back into the toy.

     "Please mommy! I-I'll be good for you from now on! Promise!" He whined, turning his head so he could look back at you with a pleading look in his eyes. You rolled your eyes before smirking and moving your other hand to play with his tip. You leaned over him so you could whisper in his ear. 

     "Go ahead baby, cum for mommy." He came while a mantra of 'thank you's left him. He let out a breath of exhaustion before whimpering once your hands didn't slow their movements. His eyes widened in realization.

     "W-wait, mommy!" He whined, squirming to get away from your hands. You removed your hand from his dick to spank him once, making him whimper.

     "Stay still. I thought you said you were gonna be a good boy for mommy." His whimpers turned to loud moans as the pain from the overstimulation drifted into pleasure. You snickered when you noticed him grinding back into your hands. "I thought you wanted me to stop, baby." He shook his head violently, whimpering as he felt a knot build up in his belly.

     "D-don't stop! Please d-don't stop! F-feels so good!" You leaned over him again, pressing your breasts to his back as you bit and sucked marks onto his neck. He was so focused on the pleasure he was receiving, he didn't notice that you moved one of your hands until he felt the vibrations from the plug suddenly shoot up. You smirked at his surprised gasps and whines as you switched the plug to max, stopping the thrusts to press it directly against his prostate. He babbled incoherently as the pleasure overtook his body, his sudden orgasm hitting him hard. His jaw fell open in a silent moan as his release covered the underside of the counter. You pressed the plug into him harder, making another spurt of cum shoot out of his tip before turning the toy off and carefully pulling it out of him. You removed his shirt so you could clean up the counter before pulling his pants and boxers the rest of the way off so you could clean them later.

     His body twitched slightly when you removed the plug. His mind was fuzzy and he couldn't even think about where he was until he felt his warm sheets around him. He hadn't even realized you had cleaned him up and moved him to the bedroom. You smiled at him, pushing some of his hair out of his face before bringing him into a sweet kiss. He smiled against your lips, pushing himself as close to you as he could. You cupped his face in your hands as you pulled away to look at him.

     "Are you alright baby?" He smiled at your concern before nodding, burying his face in your neck.

     "I'm fine." You let out a small sigh of relief as you pulled him closer to you.

     "Good. You can always tell me if I go too far y'know. I don't want to hurt you too bad." He looked up at you, pressing a few kisses to your jawline. 

     "I know you would never hurt me like that. I trust you." He mumbled. Your heart warmed at his statement and you kissed the top of his head.

     "I love you baby." All you got in return was a quiet snore, making you giggle before closing your eyes and drifting to sleep.

[dwaynepride]

💖💖 valentine's day love prompts 💖💖

DAY 3: leon vance - asking someone out

words: 735

tags: @dressed-up-just-like-z1ggy​​ @ms-allenbrown​​ @ikbenplant​ @dylpickles1267​​ @diaryofafan17​​ @specialagentlokitty​​ @stanathanxoox​ @pageofultron​

Leon knows there has to be something seriously wrong with him. Because why else would he be feeling so damn anxious walking down a highschool hallway?

This type of anxiety - it’s unusual for him. Of course, being Director of NCIS, there’s moments of high stress that get him antsy. Adrenaline pumping through his veins. His body pushing him to do something like run or fight. But this feeling is so different. And in some ways, it’s so much worse.

Leon’s hands curl into fists, hoping to ease the light tremble as he walks down the quiet hall. The walls are covered with paper and posters and other things he doesn’t know about because, frankly, he’s been doing a poor job of keeping up with Kayla’s school activities.

And that neglect is what brought him here - walking down a quiet hall for a parent-teacher conference.

He stops at your door, familiar from the open house he attended at the beginning of the year. Carefully, Leon peeks in and finds you alone on the computer. 

Clearing his throat, Leon takes a moment to stand up straight and fix his tie before pulling the door open. 

Immediately, you look up at him, and any semblance of control he had over his anxiety flies out the window.

“Mr. Vance! Welcome,” you greet him in a light tone. Though, eyeing the pile of papers sitting on your desk and the general state of your classroom, he figures you must be exhausted. It only makes Leon that much more guilty - surely you have better things to do with your time.

But then you stand up, smile at him, and he can’t help but give a tiny smile back. “Or should I say Director Vance,” you add on, reaching your hand out for a handshake.

He takes it easily. “Or you can call me Leon. I don’t mind,” he replies. The words came out so naturally, it shocks him. Was that okay to say, or should he be putting up some more professional walls? You’re uncharted territory.

“Leon,” you say. And he quickly decides against the strict professionalism. “It’s been some time since I’ve seen you. I hope you’re doing well.”

“I am doing well. Thank you,” Leon says, voice carefully steady. “And you?”

“Other than having fifty-two tests to grade tonight,” your hand motions to the pile of papers from earlier, “I’m good.”

You’re still smiling, no sign of any real annoyance from the tests and Leon has to remind himself to stay focused. It’s a meeting. Don’t get too lost in small talk. So he nods and sits down in the chair opposite your desk. “Well, I’ll try not to take up much of your time,” he promises.

And he really tries to pay attention. You’re telling him about Kayla’s recent test scores - nothing too terrible, but definitely not up to her usual standards. As you tell him this, Leon can tell you’re really concerned about it. He has a pretty good bullshit-detector and it hasn’t gone off once with you, as it might have with other teachers who don’t care as much. 

It softens him, your worry for his daughter. 

That’s what keeps distracting him. That, and how you manage to look so pretty under the stale white lights overhead.

“I’d suggest finding her a tutor,” you finish off. “Some extra practice may go a long way. She’s a smart girl, I think she just needs some more help.”

Leon finally nods once, putting on a serious expression. “I’ll talk to her about it. I’m glad you brought this to my attention.” Does that sound too cold? Too stoic? He hopes he doesn’t sound like the other parents - other politicians or military personnel too busy to put much thought into their kid’s education.

Still, you offer a smile as you stand. He quickly follows with a lurch of his stomach. Is the meeting over already? “I’ll be happy to suggest some tutors for you, if you’d like. I can send a list in an email.”

“I’d appreciate that,” Leon quickly says. 

“Consider it done,” you reply. 

It’s done. It’s over. Vance gives another nod of his head as he backs away toward the door. “Have a nice evening,” he tells you before turning. Leon prepares himself for another silent walk through the hall, likely looking back to your door and wondering if there’s more he should have said.

But you say his name. Professional, but soft in a way that makes him freeze and turn back. Your weight shifts immediately, eyes darting away - sometimes, Leon wishes he wasn’t so astute to the nervous habits of other people. “I don’t know if Kayla told you, but we’re planning a field trip in February. Parents are encouraged to attend.” Your voice trails off a bit, hands coming to clasp together.

Leon holds his breath. Watches you silently. Doesn’t dare get his hopes up.

“I hope you can come. Help me chaperone the class,” you continue, then shrug sheepishly. “It’ll be fun.”

“I’ll be there,” he immediately replies. “Put the date in the email.”

You nod almost too-excitedly before sitting back down. And as Leon exits the classroom, he starts thinking of ways he can take that day off without Gibbs catching wind of it.

[the-fiction-witch]

Lovely Tag Thomas Brodie Sangster

A - Affection [How affectionate are they with you?]

He's very affectionate, when at home but never in public. He likes to be affectionate and a little weird with you he'll poke you and then just lick your nose for no reason but its so cute and adorable, he'll just walk behind you and cuddle you tightly while your looking in the fridge, and he'll spank your butt as you bend over just generally cute fun affection

B - Butter [How much do they coddle you, and how?]

He does like to coddle you a little, he keeps you away from the press, the internet and all the sorts of things that would upset you, and really anything that you could get hurt in anyway he will not allow it full stop not going to happen, he wasn't even that thrilled about you being on his bike for the first time but he bought you so much gear that if you where to have an accident you would be as okay as he could possibly make you, he very much stands as your night from all the bad things that could hurt you even if you whine about being allowed to do more then you are

"god damn it! I am not going to electrocute myself Thomas! I'm just changing the light bulb"

"I wasn't worried about you electrocuting yourself I'm worried about you falling off the chair.... and shocking yourself"

C - Confide [How easily do they confide to you?]

He was open to confiding with you, however it was sort of an unspoken thing that it was sort of tit for tat as it were, if you confided something in him he would confide something in you almost like a trade, he would never keep a secret from you or anything just didn't feel the need to tell you unless you asked really or if you had said something,

D - Defensive [How protective are they over you?]

He can get very defensive especially with the internet he knows the sorts of things they say about you and he tried so hard to protect you, he tries to make sure the press stay out of your business and away from you, hides you behind him a little when there is camera's around because he knows the sorts of things they will say about you so he tries very hard to protect you.

E - Exhausted [How do they take care of you when you're tired or feeling low?]

It takes him a little while to notice but once he's realized he'll make you something nice to eat that won't make you feel any worse, let you sit across his lap and tell him all about it or just fall asleep on him whichever you need at the time, he'll cuddle you as tight as you want make run his hands across anywhere that hurts, petting your hair and soothing you with kisses and reassuring lovely words

F - Fluffy [How sappily sweet can they get?]

He can get pretty sappy if he wants to. but its a rare thing its saved for date nights and celebrations, but you can tell he's in a sappy mode because he'll be leaning his head on his hand and looking at you with that stupid dorky smile and he'll tell you out of the blue how much he loves you.

G - Game [How much do they play around, and are they a tease?]

He loves to play around, licking your cheek, poking your nose, eating your hair, doing all the stilly childish things that make you laugh even if its just an awkward laugh of weirdness, picking you up and carrying you around on his shoulder like his personal damsel in distress,

H - Happy [What's their favourite thing to do with you, that makes them happy?]

He loves having you on the back of his bike, He likes wrapping you up in all the gear and in his spare helmet he loves feeling your arms around him as you hold him close as he speeds his motorbike though London, going a little fast as you go around round about's going super fast on the duel carriage ways, taking you off to little unknown beauty spots for you to lean on the bike and cuddle.

I - Initiate [Do they make the first move?]

He will always make the first move, unless your in public then he always waits for you. He'll wrap his arm around you and give you a little kiss as you watch tv or cuddle up and have some kisses as you make dinner.

J - Jealousy [How jealous can they get and how do they show it?]

He'll glare. If he starts to get jealous He'll get very quiet and just glare at whoever it is talking with you, One day you where out to dinner with Dylan while he was visiting London for press and the two of you where just having a nice chat getting along really well and you could have sworn Dylan was about to burst into flames the way Thomas was glaring at him.

L - Love [How do they react to you giving them affection?]

He blushes and giggles a little when you give him affection and he'll always give you some back ,if you give his cheek a sweet kiss then he'll give you one back, if you give him a cuddle he'll cuddle you even tighter, he loves giving you affection and it always makes him smile and go all giggly

M - Married [What's it like to be married to them?]

its lovely, he's very kind and sweet as well as playful so it never gets dull or boring. Luckily he likes to ticker so he's a very handy husband doing household tasks like fixing the sink or building furniture, he's a perfect husband and you wouldn't change it for the world.

N - Newborn [How are they with having kids, and how would they be as a parent?]

he got so happy, he wanted to show the whole world your baby bump, he told every human being he possible could that you where pregnant and that he did it! he treats you like a princess anyway and when you where pregnant he treated you as if you where his queen, he held your hand every moment from the second you knew to the moment your baby was born. you where worried due to his work that he would end up being a bit absent from your children's lives but he always makes time for them, taking you all with him or even turning things down when he can't have the time with you, you and his children became the priority above everything on earth, and he spoils them a lot, but not enough that they become spoilt little rich kids they still learn to work and a good ethics, and still have to earn there pocket money even if Thomas spoils them around Christmas and there birthdays. And your children respect him, as the man of the house and as there father likely because of this odd wise father sat in an old chair with a facial hair and a cigarette look that he sort of developed when you had children, they love him and he loves them all very much too.

O - Outdoors [How are they with you in public?]

He likes to hold your hand, keep you close but not so much with kissing and such like probably because London is a very busy place and he doesn't like people seeing you kissing and cuddling,

P - Propose [How would they propose, and where would that be?]

He did it quiet classic, with the beautiful ring in a little red velvet box, getting down on his knee telling you how much he loves you, he made sure to make sure you did your make up and your hair and wear a nice dress even if it was hard to make you do so without letting out something was happening. He took you to your date spot in hyde park and tricked you into looking for an ice cream cart so he had time to get the ring and get down on one knee before you turned back.

Q - Quarrel [How are they after a fight, and will they try to make amends right after?]

if there is a fight between you even if it is very rare he goes and sits in his shed for a while on his little stool pondering with his tools until he knows he was a dick or he did wrong and he goes out on his bike and returns with a bottle of wine, the biggest box of your favourite chocolates and a nice bunch of flowers or perhaps a little cute potted plant and he'll apologize a thousand times until you smile again

R - Romantic [How much of a hopeless romantic are they, and how do they show it?]

He's romantic with gestures, buying you plants and plushies, making you a nice dinner, helping you with your favourite crafting, putting on your shows and such, he likes spoiling you with whatever you ask for even stuff you don't ask for.

S - Snuggles [Do they like to cuddle, and how do they do it?]

He is okay with a cuddle its just never completely cuddly as he doesn't like trapping you or making you feel claustrophobic, and he likes to be the little spoon a lot just rests his head on your shoulder or your chest an arm around your waist while he nuzzles up and tells you he loves you before bed time.  

T - Touchy [How touch starved are they, and would they show it?]

He doesn't show it as its kinda his default state being away from you for work so much and often when he is home being off with jack on the bikes or at auditions and such being touch starved is actually pretty normal for Thomas, but you can always tell when he's got it bad because he'll just hold you for... well until you move yourself.

U - Urchin [What's one negative trait about them that hurts you?]

He at times gets lost in what he's doing he tends to focus on one thing like if he's in his shed working on his bike he won't respond to messages, he won't do anything else unless you literally go to the shed and poke him, which can be great when you get him focused on something you want him to do, like cleaning the house, he won't stop of change focus until it's spotless but if he gets stuck on something like playing his video game he will not move until you force him or he gets bored.

V - Vibe [What energy do they give off when you're with them?]

Just pure joy. Whenever he's with you he feels like a child in love, giddy, excited and full of joy.

W- Wedding [What are they like at their wedding?]

teary, He could barely get thought seeing you before he completely  bursting into tears, Barely though the vows before getting teary. but its okay it was all tears of joy and you kissed away all his tears after the ceremony.

X - Xtreme [What lengths would they go to for you?]

he would do anything you asked, and he would often offer if you wanted something off him. He'll do his best to do what you ask even if at times he can't help it, like if your sad and you miss him when he's away working. He'll do his best to call you up or skype you for a while maybe flight you out to visit him if possible, but even if he can't due to time zones or anything he'll make it all up to you buy taking you out and spoiling you when he's home.

Y - Yogurt [What's their ideal place for a date?]

Thomas loves taking you on a nice motorbike ride to the seaside or the beautiful grounds and gardens of a nice house or Park, a little dinner in a small not to busy restaurant and an ice cream before heading home for a cuddle and a glass of wine.  

Z - Zipper [What clothes do they like seeing you in?] His, he can't help but go bright red and almost verbally awww at you when he sees you in his clothes. But he also loves when you dress up as he says himself its fun to dress up so you always have a day once a month or so where you get fully dressed up in heels a dress, and he gets on a full suit and you have your own little red carpet trip in his vintage car, to go and get pizza.

[weyheyjxlya]

Ａｌｉｖｅ

*•.¸♡ pairing: sugawara koushi x reader

*•.¸♡ genre: nsfw || smut (this is my first time writing one, gomen)

*•.¸♡ prompt : Mirror fuck

*•.¸♡ warning: gay!sugawara au, fingering, handjob, praising?, soft dom!suga? (I’m kinda not good with warnings sorry)

*•.¸♡ a/n : so this is my first server collab from the first server where I’ve met various kinds of people who supported and sparked my inner frustrated writer within. so yeah! I hope this won’t be the last one writing nsfw because geesh it fucked my brains out so ya, I didn’t get to upload my chapter 06.2 because I crammed with this. so I hope you enjoy this babies! ilysm!! also listen to the music indicated while reading it, okay? THAANK YOU!!

“My love,  I’m so afraid for things to change My love, Guess i’m too carried away”

“I guess it is not a dream, yeah?” he asked doubtedly while cuddling you “Yeah, it isn’t kou,” you replied as you’re slowly drifting away from exhaustion. Slowly.. slowly.. slowly… “I really hope this isn’t fantasy. If this what I get for being alive? Then I want it. You are life y/n.” he confessed while caressing your face with the back of his hand as he momentarily appreciates your lovely existence.

“Why am I still alive Kou-chaaaannn??!?” you whined as you shook Sugawara’s hands when you grabbed it out of frustration from your cheating boyfriend that just broke up with you. “You know Y/N-chan, there’s like plenty of fishes in the sea!! Why not search for someone right at this moment and time? I cam even suggest one from the volleyball club! Not Daichi though, he’s mine!!” he protested excitedly.

Back from your first-year senior high school days, you’ve met this light-gray-haired guy with an average height and a slender build. But what attracted you the most is that wonderful mole just below his left eye. It’s so beautiful. It brought out the best of his majestic face like some kind of an accessory that matches the one who wears it perfectly. This guy is such a work of art. You’ve felt your heartbeat continue for like a while when he greeted you charismatically. Showing to you that extraordinary smile, you’ve felt captivated. Damn, this man is so fine “Uhm hi!! I’m Sugawara Koushi. How about you?” he asked “Oh yeah, I’m L/N Y/N! N-nice to m-meet you,” you replied “Nice to meet you also Y/N-chan. I’ve noticed that you’ve been looking at me for a while. Uhm, this is kinda embarrassing but I am gay,” “Oh wow, omg thank you for saying that to me. And yeah, no judgment involved but there’s one thing certain right now,” you cooed “Hmm, what is it? You’re acting kinda weird haha” Sugawara replied nervously “Let’s be friends Koushi!” you’ve suggested “That’s kind of quick but yeah, fine!” he acknowledged ~~ From high school until college, both of you are always together. Both of you are frequently called out as a couple at first but will feel embarrassed when they got to know who Sugawa is. Months and years passed, you only just thought Sugawara as your best friend. You’ve tried your best to bore in into your mind but your heart always betrayed you. You still like Sugawara all along and you fell hard for him. Hence, you’ve tried your best to suppress it. So you’ve got yourself into various relationships, that in the end, it just ends in like a flick of a hand. It’s easy, momentarily, pretend, and temporary. You just can’t get Sugawara out of your heart.  It even got to the point where you’re imagining Sugawara as your own partner in life and love –also in bed because everything just felt so empty. You can’t get him out of your heart. Then finally, you’ve met some guy which helped you got into a relationship seriously.

“Am I too ugly? Do I lack anything? Why did I got cheated on Kou-chan?” you sobbed again despite the moisturizer that Sugawara applied on your face to prep you from glamor. You’ve been adoring yourself for a while now and you’re wearing a deep red silk robe that has done its job perfectly. Hugging your beautiful curves,  complimenting your beautiful skin, and made you feel things again that you’ve forgotten for quite a long time. Dreamy as it is but you’ve been wondering. You’ve done everything you can but still, why have you been cheated on? “Y/N-chan, come on. You’re more than that, we both know it. I won’t be sticking with you up until now (even though we barely meet for a while recently since your boyfriend gets jealous because of me) if you don’t have that beaut,” Sugawara comforted with tease while smoothing out your dress for your night out after your boyfriend cheated on you “Gosh, the pain and pleasure that I got every night because of his jealousy over you. I might die the day after,” you protested jokingly while drying off your tears with tissue from the vanity mirror because you’ve wasted quite an amount of expensive moisturizer that had been put on your face because of some tears that fell over for some garbage kind of a guy. Suddenly, Sugawara stopped with what he’s doing when he heard your sudden confession then he walked over you, poker-faced at the edge of the bed to join you to face the mirror. “Come on dear, now close your eyes and let me finish up that art that I’ll create upon this beautiful face of yours,” Sugawara offered with a sudden change of his face, from straight face to a now charming smile as he scooted over you and started reapplying a small amount of that expensive moisturizer again to coat all the spaces that have the moisturizer erased. The application this time is quite relaxing. Suga’s gentle hands have been stroking it ever so gently for a while. Then suddenly, he stopped. As a response to your curiosity, you slowly opened your eyes. Without warning, Sugawara’s lips are planted upon yours. Due to your own shock, you’ve tried to pull yourself from him but he didn’t let it happen. He gently bent your head slightly to the back and then held your face like it’s the most fragile thing that he has ever held on and continued placing kisses in various places. Before you could protest, you’re now drunk from the euphoria that Sugawara gave you. With hearts thumping loud, mind becoming black, and your own body becoming numb and now giving into his kisses, you’ve wanted this for so long and it’s happening now. So without thinking, you drew your arms around his neck and you’ve felt his flirtatious grin drawn in his lips.  He guided your head to the side then he continued kissing until he insistently licked your lips as permission to part your trembling lips. Without a moment’s hesitation, you gave in to him completely. You dropped all your guards down as this is the moment that you’ve been longing for. That sweet,  gentle, and addicting kiss of his made you forget all types of kisses that you’ve experienced before. It was experienced and mature. But then you’ve felt sad and Sugawara felt the sudden emotion because that you’ve become unresponsive to his kiss. “Why sugar?” he asked as he momentarily pulled back from the kiss “You’re really experienced with this and those experiences aren’t with me,” you pouted as tears fell upon your cheeks “Shush sugar. If it’s not for those experiences, I wouldn’t be this great for you, right? This is a new case for me but this sensation that I’m feeling right now cannot compare to anything. You make me feel things Y/N and I love you so much that it hurts,” he replied while wiping your tears with the back of his hands. “Come here sugar,” he sweetly called as he patted his lap and he held out his hands and you took it. Swiftly, as you sat on his lap he immediately pulled you into a tight hug and nuzzled the crook of your head like it’s the last time that he’ll see you. “Finally, you’re here now,” he murmured as he immediately pulled your face and started kissing you. It’s gentle but demanding. The kiss made you feel completely melted as every inch of your body dissolves into his. The fuzzy feeling made you wrap your shoulders around his neck, grip into his hair, and pulled him closer. You’ve never felt like this before. Hungry as it is but you’ve never wanted anyone like this ever. As this moment continues, both of you are now completely peeling off the label “friends” in between you and both of you know it so well. This is the beginning of something. Breaths may stop you for a short moment but it never became a hindrance as both of you are passionately showing how needy you are with each other. As the kiss continued, Sugawara realized how long he had been holding back from this passionate desire to be yours completely.  How perplexed he is at night when he realizes that he fell for such an idiotic straight best friend of his. How jealous he is every time you get into another relationship. How irritated he can sense how much of an asshole since he is a man a swell. How sad he is when you’re not by his side because you’re with someone. He wanted you all along but he suppressed it just to keep you from the awkwardness and from leaving him. Now that the moment’s here, he’s now thanking the heavens as this moment has been taking the man out of him. Now he’s praying that they keep him from where the light is because he might lose himself from this moment. Slowly, Sugawara pushed you backward, without breaking the kiss he laid you flat against the bed. On your peripheral vision, you witness how you’re deliciously making out in the mirror but you don’t care. You don’t care because it has been years since you’ve been longing for this. Even after those stupid relationships, it is still him. Sugawara Koushi is the only thing that you want for. The feeling of his weight upon yours sent signals all throughout your system because the feeling is phenomenal. You get to take in his sweet kind of cinnamon and a little hint of clean linen smell that lingers his body –this kind smell of his has sent you wanting his body more. His hands are now exploring everywhere and it doesn’t matter. He starts planting kisses upon your jaw down to your neck when he starts searching for the sash of your robe. When he got a hold of it he suddenly pulled back and stared at you with his charming puppy eyes and without hesitation, you nodded which left an angelic grin upon his face. He lets go and placed the robe sash on a spot where he can find it then he cupped your face again to passionately kiss it again and the other hand travels with delicious, teasing, and slow speed down from your neck, collar, breasts, and hips as he finally reached the robe sash again that sent shivers down your spine. When he finally released the bow from being tied, he gently helped you get free from the garment. As he finally got you out of it and the robe not within your sight, he sat upright then he deliciously registered your naked body with a burning gaze that consumes you in no time. “I could look at this all throughout my life sugar. You’re extraordinary and I love you so much,” he praised when he lifted his shirt over his head and undoes his pants with his underwear and throws it off from the bed. Having the image of the naked Sugawara in front of you is heavenly that it awakened your inner woman twerking its ass off from the happiness that it’s experiencing right now. He is beyond beautiful. Charming in his own ways. Angelic but it looked like the one who’s gonna cut our wings with and escape. Sugawara really looked like a man that came out of your dreams. Suddenly, your mouth became dry when you saw his growing member that made you gasp for some air. Seeing this reaction seeping out of you Sugawara chuckled and he excitedly hovered over you again. Sugawara strokes your face with the back of his hands and obviously, his touch resonates in the depth of your groin. Bending over, Sugawara slowly kissed your lips and started his slow torture. Starting from your neck down to your breast he started trailing kisses, nuzzling, then sucking hard that left its trails with love bruises. Every kiss made your nipples peak and harden as it starts off the fire of your desire. When Sugawara saw, he put on his devilish grin and has now started sucking your nipple from the left breast while deliciously playing with his hand on the other that left you panting and grabbing his hair because you’re now selfishly wanting for more. “Koushi, please,” you begged “So eager huh, okay sugar,” he responded and suddenly his tongue is suddenly inside your mouth then he started again with his travel starting from your breasts, across your stomach, and down to your navel. He sits up again with eyes brimming with joy as he wondered over the art that he made across your beautiful body. Feeling proud because he’s the creator of it. Out of joy, he bent down again and starts shifting lower until he reached your clitoris. You cried out by this traveling of his then you suddenly felt all of your nerves when his incredible tongue worked its way on your cunt so much that it left you a whining mess. “Calm down sugar,” he mumbled when he deliciously continued his business with your cunt and suddenly he slipped one finger which left you breathless and gasping for air. Then he slipped one more and this leads you to the edge as he started moving it in and out with agonizing slowness. The stimulation you’re experiencing was extravagant due to the mere fact that you’re doing it with the subject of your suppressed love. “Hmmm, this is definitely new for me, sugar and I’m loving it. Most specifically this,” he murmured when he starts stroking your spongy walls then he continues with relentlessly licking and sucking your clit which made your mind get blown by the stimulation and sensation that Sugawara gives you. After a few pumps, you have reached your first mind-blowing orgasms which left your sense go numb and your body go limp. Due to your sudden burst and to your mind-blowing high you instantaneously thought of Sugawara. So all of a sudden you sat up then pushed him back and you grabbed his member and started palming him which then he let out a loud groan and started looking upon you with a hooded and full of desire gaze which left you excitingly and slowly pumping him until he reached his own orgasm that he had been holding back for a while now. “Well that’s kind of embarrassing, I’ve been holding that back for a while now. Oh well, patience sugar. This will soon fill you up,” he replied and winked as he reached for the condom which is in one of the drawers of his vanity mirror. He planted a kiss on your lips first then he laid you again on the bed then started hovering over you again, he slipped on a condom, and then without asking for permission, he’s inside you, slow at first but builds up its pace until it’s hard and fast. Groans, moans, and lewd sounds of your bodies clashing have filled the room which leads you both nearing your own orgasms but to your dismay, on the spur of the moment, Sugawara pulled out of you and flips you over. When you took your time to flip over because your body’s been limp and all, he suddenly pulled you upright so that you’re practically sitting on him. But what made heat haunted your ears and face more, it’s that you’re now facing the mirror that has its lights on. He scooted the both of you a little to the side and now you can brightly see how your cunt sucking in his dick nearly balls deep. “Kou this is kinda embarrassing,” you mewled as you held your face due to your obvious embarrassment. “Then enjoy it sugar,” he replied with amusement. Splendidly, his hands moved up to your breasts, palms it, and tugging gently on your nipples which made your groan for more and tossing your head back against his shoulders. He starts biting downs your neck when he splendidly flexes his hips, filling you up slowly again and again. “You mean the world to me sugar. I’ve realized how empty I am when you’re gone so I never want to let you go now” he breathes against your ear “Yes and neither do I Koushi,” you gasped as he starts slamming to you again to your mewl over his name. This never felt so good he thought. As he was slamming you so hard your moans and cries are now echoing the whole room. “That’s right sugar, let me hear you,” he whispered as he snakes one hand on your waist and another on your hip. Firmly that you know it’ll leave some mark after then he pushes into you harder and harder. With your breaths growing harsher and harsher, ragged, tired, and with gritted teeth both of you found your release together. After catching up some air, both of you collapsed on the bed together and you are now curled up on the bed with his front pressed on your back, his nose on your hair. “What I’m feeling right now frightens me Koushi,” you trembled “Me too Y/N. Everything’s so new to me,” he says quietly “I know, so what if this is just on a whim then you’ll leave me,” you choked as the thought is horrific. “It won’t happen and I won’t go somewhere sugar. I love you so much,” So to confirm the answer you turned your back to gaze at him and he’s now showing a serious and sincere face and it made your heart flutter. You leaned over and kissed him gently and he smiled and reaches up to tuck your hair behind your ear which calmed down your heart more. “I’ve never ever felt this amazing sugar and you made it happen. My heart cannot settle itself right now because you’re here in my arms now. I would do everything just to feel this way and to not lose you anymore Y/N. You have my whole heart, I promise.” he promised as you kiss him again and it planted a smile on your lips “So this is not a dream, yeah?” he asked doubtedly while cuddling you “Yeah, it isn’t kou,” you replied as you’re slowly drifting away from exhaustion. Slowly.. slowly.. slowly… “I really hope this isn’t fantasy. If this what I get for being alive? Then I want it. You are life y/n.” he confessed while caressing your face with the back of his hand as he momentarily appreciates your lovely existence. “I promise, even to death. I’ll love you forever Y/N,” he added as he also drifts away to sleep

*•.¸♡ gen. taglist ♡¸.•*  here ya go @maviiiiic​

[ddalgi-yong]

Hi I think my ask may have gotten eaten by tumblr bc I didn’t see my req on the list so sorry if you alr got it and this is a duplicate... I wanted to request Taeyong with Smut 16, fluff 6, and angst 20 please :)🌹❤️💊🩸✨💦

never hurt you

genre: yandere; angst

pairing: taeyong x reader

“hurting you is the last thing I’d do; you know that.” + “i may or may not have left some… marks.” + “why can’t we just talk about it?” + taeyong

taeyong and you were invited to some party. you had no idea, what kind of party it was, but your boyfriend told you to wear something elegant since you had some kind of important role at this party.

you did not know what he actually meant, but you just said, you would get ready and went to your shared bedroom. taeyong followed you a few minutes later, had lied himself down on the bed.

you were looking through your dresses but only shook your head, since you did not really like them or thought, they are not good enough for being 'elegant'. "which one will you wear?", taeyong asked you. you startled a bit, because he was silent all this time and eventually you even forgot that he was lying on your shared bed.

"i actually have no idea. what do you think?", you picked two dresses, one of them black and was pretty short. the other one had a dark tone of red and was even more revealing than the other one.

"none."

you arched one of your eyebrows. "and what do you think, i should wear?" taeyong sighed and got up, mumbling something like "do I really have to do everything?" and looked through your dresses. he picked one, which was actually really long and was not really revealing; exactly the way he wants you to dress.

"no fucking way", you said, laughing at his choice. the dress was actually really pretty but you declined, chose to wear the red one.

your boyfriend did not talk to you anymore that night.

the party took place at a huge hall. it was actually pretty dark in there but you just sat silently at your table, looking to taeyong talking to some unknown men. you had no idea who they were but you just sat there; you knew you had disappointed him. taeyong was someone who got disappointed and angry really fast and you were kind of scared, he might hurt you. but as always you remembered that he could never hurt you.

that was something he had promised you the day you two started dating. and he never broke that promise.

you startled as someone sat next to you. it was not taeyong, he was still talking to these unknown men. “hello, beautiful”, the man was actually really handsome. you ignored him, since you did not want to make taeyong angry. your boyfriend was so jealous at some times but you got used to it.

“it is really rude to ignore a person”, he said and you sighed. 

“what do you want from me?”, you snapped, you were pissed that your boyfriend ignored you. 

“i just did not want that a beautiful lady like you stay alone at this kind of party where it is full of dangerous men”, he chuckled, “i am daesung. what is your name, princess?”

“leave her the fuck alone”, your boyfriend approached behind you and pulled daesung up. he was furious. so angry. he was so angry and jealous. no one should have talked to you like that. “Who are you to tell me what to do?!”, daesung snapped, making taeyong even angrier than he already was. “i am her fucking boyfriend and if you don’t get the fuck out of here, I swear to god, I’m going to kill you.”

you were actually scared at that one moment. taeyong was capable of things, you could never imagine. he could and would actually kill someone, if this person really provokes him and makes him angry.

“fine”, the man said, rolling his eyes. he got up and smiled softly at you. then he was gone. taeyong looked at you, he said nothing. “we’re heading home soon. get ready”, he ordered and you nodded. 

“i’ll be back in a few”, you said and got up. you went to the bathroom and checked how you looked. 

“hello sweetheart”, someone said, pinned you against the wall. It was daesung, grinning and you were basically disgusted by it. “i thought your boyfriend interrupted us during our conversation. what about… we continue it now?”, he said.

“leave me alone”, you said, tried to push him away. but instead he kissed you. hard, not even close to be like the way taeyong kissed you. and then… your boyfriend saved you. But he was not angry at daesung. he was angry at you. he was angry, that you did not listen to him, that you wore this short, revealing dress that drove him crazy.

“go to the car, y/n”, he said. his voice was so calm, but you knew he was angry. as you did not move, he yelled at you: “go to the fucking car, y/n!” you flinched, nodded and ran away. you sat down as he unlocked the doors and you were shaking so hard, you were so scared. He drove fast to your shared apartment.

taeyong pinned you at the door, right after he closed it. he seemed so calm, but you knew, he was so angry. the short dress you wore drove him crazy and after you both returned home, he wanted you to wait for him. after an hour he was back at your shared apartment. you were shaking, scared, that he might hurt you. but you knew, he would never do that. he loved you too much to hurt you. he could never see you suffering.

but the second taeyong entered the apartment drunk and with blood on his white dress-shirt, you were not really sure about it. he pinned you against the next wall and his fist landed right next to your head. You flinched and looked in his eyes.

“he got what he deserved”, taeyong whispered, “you’re mine and nothing and no one will ever be able to change that.” you gulped and nodded, you weren’t able to speak.

“i killed him.”

those were the last words he said to you this night. He just let you go and went to sleep. You were to scared by him so you just slept on the couch.

-----

“wake up, baby girl”, he softly whispered into your ear. “please, wake up.”

“what, taeyong”, you said rolling your eyes. you just wanted to sleep more. but then, as you woke up and knew where you were, you sat up and looked at him. “i missed you having in my arms”, he said softly, “i couldn’t sleep properly because you weren’t there.”

“i don’t care, taeyong. you… you just killed him. because he was close to me. do you have a clue about how scared I was?!”, you screamed. he just sat there, said nothing. “and now you’re sitting here, saying you missed me having in your arms?”

“i’m sorry, Y/N… i was so angry because i had warned you but you did not listen to me. this all happened because of this damn dress and you fucking know it! why can’t we just properly talk about this?”, he yelled. he pinned you down and lied himself on you. his hands were roaming on your body roughly and you hated that you actually did like this feeling. Still, you tried to push him away, but he kissed you. Softly. he was so soft, you basically melted because of his touch.

“let me show you how much I love you, babygirl”, he whispered and kissed over your neck. “i promised you a long time ago, that I would never hurt you, baby. it’s the last thing i’d ever do in my life… did I ever broke this promise?” you shook your head, smiling a bit. 

your boyfriend was crazy. but you knew what you were doing when you two started dating. you knew about his crazy jealousy. you knew about his weird mafia shit. but still you loved him. and he loved you. he proves this to you every day. even if he had killed many, many people just because of his jealousy… you still loved him. it was crazy, yes, but it was like that and you did not want anything to change.

because you loved him.

“i love you”, he murmured, his voice weak: and as you turned yourself to him, you saw him closing his eyes in exhaustion. he probably didn’t sleep well since he always had issues to sleep when you weren’t with him.

“i love you, too”, you said and hugged him tightly.

“also… i may or may not have left some marks on your neck”, he said biting his lips to keep himself from giggling.

“you asshole!”, you laughed and hit him softly on his naked chest. he acted like he was truly hurt but you knew he was just joking around.

“let’s just sleep. they’ll fade away anyway”, he said and placed another kiss on your neck before pulling you closer to himself. embraced in his warmth, you fell asleep again.

[animepreferences]

P R E F E R E N C E # 8 - I H A T E Y O U

*Authors Note: I got sent home from work with a fever and I’m feeling a bit ill, but I wanted to write this for you guys. Hopefully my emotions don’t reflect too much on this preference and it isn’t too dark. Sometimes I overdue it a bit when I’m feeling low.

C H U U Y A

“I hate you.”

He had went too far. He knew it almost immediately, as he watched your face change instantly, the anger absolving into hurt. He would watch as your parted lips would mash into a grimace, your eyes instantly filling with hurt. He knew his words were mean, he even knew that he was taking his anger out on you. He didn’t know, however, that you were taking it so personally. And the second the tears would gush down your cheeks miserably, his heart would shatter into a million and one pieces because he would know.

“Y/N-Y/N...” He would stutter, his breath hitching in the back of his throat as he stared at you completely bewildered. He wanted to hold you in his arms, tell you how sorry he was, but he didn’t know how deep the hurt went, and he didn’t want you to push him away. Sure, he would be deserving of that. Sure, it would totally be in order, but it would hurt him. It would hurt him tremendously.

“I’m so sorry.” Deciding against himself, he would enclose you in a bone crushing hug. At first your arms would tighten at your sides, your frame unwilling to budge. You didn’t want to hug him back, you didn’t want to give in to his malicious damage control, but in your heart you knew. You knew Chuuya; the good, the bad, the ugly. You knew his heart, his intentions. You knew he would never purposefully try to hurt you. You knew he would never mean to make your tears fall. He was simply angry. And you knew better than anyone that he didn’t know how to control his anger. You were helping him every day, but he still had so far to go. He needed you. Slowly raising your arms, you would reciprocate the hug, your cheek pressing against his chest. “I can’t take the words back now. I know you may never fully forgive me, but my heart beats for you and for you only. You can’t even begin to know the disgust I feel with myself for making you cry.” He would whisper into your hair, stroking it gently as his own tears soaked into your scalp. “Please forgive me. I can’t lose you, I’m—I’m begging.” He would plead, his chest heaving as his own tears began to fall down his cheeks rapidly. You could hear the desperation in his voice as he cried, the remorse illustrated clear as day. There’s no way this man hated you. Not for one second would you believe that, not when the strongest person you know was currently deconstructing before your eyes in fear of losing you. Chuuya loved you. He loved you so much. This you knew. “I know you love me, Chuuya. I love you too.” You would whisper as his arms would wound tighter around you, his grasp reassuring you that he would never let go of you. Not now, not ever.

-

D A Z A I

“I hate you.”

Tears would roll down your cheeks, as you would drop to your knees face buried in your hands. “I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!” You would scream until your lungs burned, your body becoming weak. “I hate you for putting yourself in danger, I hate for you never knowing when to say no, I hate you for not knowing your limits, and I hate you for-for leaving me!” Your screams would be shrill and desperate, Kunikida’s arms wrapping around your chest as he pulled you back away from Dazai’s nearly lifeless body. “L-Let go of me!” You would sob, struggling uselessly against the strong grasp. You hated how foreign his arms felt, you hated how the person comforting you should be the one who was close to death, not his partner. “Akikko Yosano will be here soon, calm down Y/N. He’s going to be okay.” Kunikida desperately tried to calm you as you let out uncontrollable wails, your screaming now happening against your own will. Really, you had forgotten you were screaming until you felt the urge to black out yourself. Furthermore, everything had became exceedingly blurry. You had always said the day you lost Dazai would be the day your own world would come to a screeching halt. Originally you had thought that it was just the romance speaking; that surely there would be a way to go on without him when that time came, but you were realizing the hard way that that would be impossible. You were realizing that without Dazai, there would be no reason to go on. No reason to live because in your body and soul you knew he was the reason. You knew that he was your purpose. Your only purpose. “You can’t die, Osamu Dazai, if you do I will-I will never forgive you. If you die before me right now, I will die HATING you!” You screamed, finally collapsing into Kunikida’s embrace your head dizzy and light. His arms clutched you tight as you sobbed, pulling the material of his shirt into your fists in frustration. “Damn it, damn it, damn it all.” You would whisper, the tears causing your frail body to tremble violently. “Kunikida-San. You can at least wait till my body is cold before you steal my love.” Dazai would choke out, blood trickling down his chin as he let out a strained cough. “Dazai, you idiot save your energy.” Kunikida would scold, loosening his grip so you could crawl to Dazai instinctively. “Don’t you dare die.” You would whisper, placing his head in your lap as you leaned down to kiss his nose, his blood transferring to your own face. “How can I knowing that you would hate me if I did?” He would inquire, his voice weak, his eyes blinking slowly. “That-That’s right. I would hate you so much.” You cried, tears dripping onto his face as he let out a frail laugh. “We can’t have that.” Feeling a hand on your shoulder, you would look up to see Yasano with genuine smile, her eyes hopeful and confident. “I can take it from here, Y/N-ah. This lunatic isn’t going to die that easy.”

-

A K U T A G A W A

“I hate you.”

You would explode, turning on your heel in a complete fit of rage. “Is that what you wanted to hear Akutagawa? Are you happy now? I hate you! I hate you! I HATE YOU!” Picking up the vase beside you, you would throw it to the ground with infuriation, ignoring how it scattered around you in a multitude of minuscule pieces. “It’s like you can’t even understand me unless I am speaking your language, so do you hear me now? Do I have your attention for once in my life? I HATE YOU!” The tears would roll down your face miserably. You had never once in your life lost your cool on him before. You had always been very patient with his unwillingness to accept the fact that he truly was a good guy in your eyes, that you loved him fervently. But you had grown exhausted by his constant stubbornness. You had had grown tired of having to tell him everyday that his heart was in the right place and he deserved to live. Most importantly, you had grown tired of his constant desire to get you to leave him; even if it was for your own sake. Why couldn’t he get over the fact that you loved him? That you weren’t going anywhere? Sometimes it felt like he didn’t want you anymore, that maybe just maybe he didn’t want you in the same way you wanted him. You just wished he would tell you that. “Y/N-“ Aku would say, his mouth parted in horror. “Don’t-Don’t look at me like that. It’s what you want, right? You want me to hate you, you want me to leave! Maybe I will!” The scream was gut wrenching, taking every last bit of energy out of you as you dropped to your knees ignoring the glass that crunched beneath your knees. The pain was unbearable, blood oozing out of you at a rapid pace, but not as unbearable as the thought of leaving Akutagawa was. To be completely fair, nothing was as unbearable as that. The room would fall into a pit of silence as your sobs would rake through your body, your sniffles as loud as a gun shot. Then Akutagawa would speak and say the words you had always yearned to hear. “I love you. Even if you do hate me. I love you for now and for always.” It was the words you had first uttered when Akutagawa had told you that he hated you. You couldn’t believe he remembered those words down to punctuation, you couldn’t believe that he was reciting them to you now. Truly he wouldn’t have remembered if he didn’t love you. “I wouldn’t want hurt anybody else either, you’re stuck with me for life unfortunately.” Quoting you again, he would lift you up by the armpits, supporting your limp body as you continued to cry against him. “I’m so sorry I’ve hurt you. I don’t for a second ever want you to leave me. I love you more than anything, more than life itself. You know how many things I’ve loved before you? I’ll give you a hint: nothing. But you...You’ve changed my life forever, Y/N. You’ve shown me humility, compassion, love...To me you are irreplaceable. To me, you are the reason why the world turns. To me, you are my reason for everything. Don’t ever leave me, I beg of you.” Usually a red blush would creep to his cheeks, but this time his face stayed grave and sincere. For once, you felt his honesty like a ton of bricks. Akutagawa loved you. He really, really loved you.