#I am severely depressed

[notrimbaud]

Bed rot Miku!

[melodydolohov23]

So no one is going to write Ava x Samantha fanfiction? How am I supposed to fill that gaping hole the book left in my heart ? Yes I'm talking about bunny by mona awad, yes it left irreparable damage

I need to see ava and samantha tangoing on that roof again

[spoopieere]

*spinning Asa in my head like a 3D marketable plushie*

[fractalheart-real]

Noël Noël

[mysticalsoot]

to my best friend at 14 that I have blocked now; you were right! i do in fact live in a toxic household! yay me! oh, sorry you hate me btw

[thatspookyswitch]

I could really use some cheering up :c

[simanzi]

couscous tastes better at midnight

[aphroditesswan]

@jaedoesthings @stareyedlunatic having to deal with my insanity 24/7

i sang the backpack song from dora for 5 minutes straight on call

pov your archon is annoying

[child-ofdust]

my f/os would never deadname or misgender me and i think that is awesome thumb up

[komaedamizuki]

sometimes i wish someone else who's actually smart and wants to live this life would take this body

[skywarpie]

:(

[howcanisaveafallenangel]

burnout irl where i just dont want to do anything

[mavigator]

i talked about it a little bit already but i have things to say about it. for context, i was born with amniotic band syndrome. the amniotic band wrapped around my left wrist in utero and stunted the growth of my hand. i was born with about half a palm, four nubs for fingers, and a twisted half of a thumb. i can open and close my thumb and pinkie joint like a claw.

yesterday at work i had a shift in the room with 5-10 year old kids. i had my left hand hidden in my sleeve (a bad habit of mine). a kid asked if he could see my hand, and even though internally i was debating running into traffic, i said “sure you can” and showed him my hands. he stared for a moment, looking disturbed, and then said “i don’t want to look at that anymore”. that hurt to hear, but i understand that kids are new to the world and he probably didn’t mean it out of malice. i put my hand away again, told him that it was okay, and that i was just born that way.

he then went on to talk about how he knows a kid with a similar hand to mine and called it “ugly”. i told him that wasn’t a very kind thing to say and that he wouldn’t feel good if someone said that to him, and he replied that no one would say that to him—because he has “normal hands”, and he’s glad he does because otherwise he’d be “ugly”. i tried to talk with him for a bit about how everybody is born differently, but he just started talking about a girl he knows with a “messed up face” and pulled on his face to make it look droopy. i went on some more about how it wasn’t very kind to talk about people that way, but the conversation moved on to something else.

i’ve told my supervisors about it and they’re going to have a talk with his mom. what i wanted to say is this: i’m genuinely not upset with the kid. kids are young and naturally curious, and he clearly simply hasn’t been taught about disabled people and kind ways to speak to/about others. which is why i am upset with his parent(s). i know he’s encountered visibly deformed/disabled people before (he said so himself!), yet his parent(s) clearly haven’t had any kind of discussion with him about proper language and behavior. i knew from birth that some people were just different than others, but my parents still made a point to assert to be kind to and accepting of others. i wonder if adults in his life are the type of people to hush him and usher him away when he points out someone in a wheelchair. that kind of thing doesn’t teach politeness. it tells children that disabled people are an Other than can’t be acknowledged or spoken about; which, to a child, means disability must be something bad.

i’m lucky enough that this was a relatively mild incident, and that i’m a grownup with thicker skin. i’m worried about the other kids he mentioned to me. has he been talking to them this way? when i was a kid, i had other kids scream, cry, and run away at the sight of my hand. or follow me around pointing at me and laughing at me. or tell me i couldn’t do something because i was ugly or incapable or whatever. one time a girl at an arcade climbed to the top of the skeeball machine, pointed at me, and screamed at me to put my hand away and wouldn’t stop crying until she couldn’t see me anymore. another time, a kid saw my hand, screamed at the top of her lungs, and ran into my friend’s arms, crying hysterically about how i was scaring her. that second incident made me cry so hard i threw up when i got home. i can kind of laugh it off now, but having people react to me that way as a child is something i’m still getting over. why do you think i have a habit of keeping my hand in my sleeve? it just irritates me to see children that have clearly not been taught basic manners and kindness—their parents Clearly missed something pretty important .

[rosy-crow]

You guys remember that post where I fawned over the Rebirth detail where Seph was smitten with Nibelheim’s beauty? The beautiful home he didn’t know was his? I feel like that got WORSE now.

So…not only did he just…not really see the world outside of that stupid building unless while on missions…but….

These tiny little dialogue bits in Rebirth feel a little deeper now? Like really man? Even after growing up, he just…missed out on seeing the world outside of war and his assignments? I’m not sure why I hoped otherwise but at this rate, I shouldn’t be surprised. It’s just depressing.

And Jenova or this….manipulative dream sequence…plays into that lack of connection to a normal or natural world…in addition to the mom issues of course. They’re in what looks like some pretty alpine meadow. Everything is just beautiful and mom is there in the center of it all.

So then, Sephiroth being struck by Nibelheim years later — a beautiful landscape that he swears he recognizes and has no clue about being the place where his real mother worked and lived….

….that’s where he finds Jenova. Drawn into a beautiful, scenic place, he finds another illusion of his mother.

He once again finds nothing but lies while so close to home.

[victorie552]

Just had a thought, it's completely half-baked: So, um, NoME I think, said that there totally could be hröar without any fëar running around, right? Translating: there could be moving bodies with no souls/occupants left.

Zombies. Middle Earth has zombies.

And when would be a better time for zombies to roam around than after Nirnaeth Arnoediad? Even more after Second and Third Kinslaying. You know who would have a perfect opportunity to fight zombies to the point of habit? Fëanorians.

So I imagined the situation where Maedhros and Maglor fight some zombies, successfully turning them into parts (I mean, duh). Then Maedhros says something self-hating like "Surely there's more good to them than was left of us(me) as it hunts and hurts without consent, intent nor will, unlike us(me)."

And Maglor looks at him, then at the zombie's head he holds. He reaps the skull open (with his hands, yes), takes zombies' brain out, and throws it at Maedhros with "We also have an evidence he had a brain, unlike some brother of mine."

Cue Medhros releasing the MOST Older Brother Sigh.

[thatspookyswitch]

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