#I am not willing to tag them because I am quite frankly kinda scared of them

[vinyl-pop]

My knee is killing me, I have low blood pressure, I have an ass ton of homework and stupid executive dysfunction won’t let me get out of bed and do shit (thank the lord my iPad was on the floor nearby). But uh- other than all that stuff, I’m feelin good. Got the first page of The Choices we Make done, working on the second and uh- was my cousin’s birthday so I got some cake. Yay.

[vtforpedro]

long, long health update - tw in tags please read them

I am going to speak very frankly about suicidal ideation; please don't read further if this is triggering for you ;3; but please know that I love you I had my follow-up appt with my neuropsych on monday to go over my results and whatnot. it was virtual, and I was in the middle of a head episode and I told her I wasn't doing well, but within about 5-10 minutes, she was saying I should probably go to the ER lkajflaj I guess it looked pretty bad lmao anyway I told her all the reasons I couldn't. medical trauma, being dismissed b/c I have doctors who manage my headaches, and I know it's not life-threatening even if it is 10/10 agonizing, so why are you here. they're so dismissive. she said that they have medication to possibly help break the cycle of constant migraines but I've been treated with those before and they didn't do shit migraines are secondary to iih. it's the iih that needs to be fixed ._. she said I still deserved to not suffer and that the ER is very strict about keeping covid patients away from other patients and I didn't have the heart to tell her they intubated a covid patient 10-15 feet away from me last time I was in an ER 😭 anyway so the results. she said she wasn't worried about anything going on that was concerning or indicating something wrong in my brain. I DID score quite a bit lower for someone my age on information processing (which is exactly what I said I was struggling with to my two neuros who were both like ehhh) and some issues with memory but they weren't super specific and so it could be something neurological, could be my migraines and constant agony lmao, could be my Emotional State. could be all of them at once, I suppose ;) she went into more detail about some of these things but it was the two questionnaires I filled out that were HNNN. so once all the data is entered from like 300 questions it shows a good look into my personality and perceptions and all that and it makes a cool little graph (OR SO I THOUGHT). the kind that looks like mountain peaks. so she points at the one that is waaay higher than the rest and nearly touching the top of the box and she's like 'do you see this one' me: yeah 😬 her: this is your feelings and ideations about suicide me: 😬 😩 😬 her: when I see a score this high, I stop what I'm doing and I call the police to have them escort you to a hospital me: 😬😬😬😬😬 her: but I didn't do that. because when we spoke in office you told me you felt this way and why you don't do it. you told me it's something you've lived with for a long time and the pain you are suffering is what makes it so bad. and I trust you me: 😭😭😭 okay her: do you see this line down here? this is people who have suicidal ideation recorded on this test. you scored 98% higher on suicidal ideation compared to people reporting suicidal ideation HNNNNNN. she said it probably wasn't surprising to me and asked me if I was safe again and all that. I assured her I was and said in my previous appointment; I've had suicidal thoughts since I was like 12? maybe earlier. there have been very few times in my life not surrounded by abuse and trauma so I'm never really free of it. I've had four traumatic incidents causing increasingly horrible episodes of ptsd in nine years. all through my 20s. still here woo, lol and she said she knew that and had a patient not long after my first appointment who had similar circumstances in their life. and they told her it's almost a comfort having it. cause I was saying it's in the back of my mind at all times and I won't do it, but yeah, it's always there. anyway she said they said the same thing; it's always there, always in the background as 'hey I'm an option!' even though we aren't going to harm ourselves. it's a comfort knowing there is an option even if we plan on never using it? idk it just spoke to me and I felt it in my soul we talked about some emotional stuff after and I cried and it was a thing. it felt really good to speak to a psychologist who, just as she was in the first appointment, seemed genuinely concerned and wanted to help

me. I told her I was ready for therapy and she said she'd already looked for therapists for me lkasjdlkja and gave me a group that I emailed yesterday. I don't think they'll take my insurance but she said to message her through the portal if they don't and she'll try to find someone who does I don't remember if I mentioned it, but since she knew about the head shit before I met her, she dimmed her office lights without asking if I needed it and like as soon as we started the virtual visit, she leaped up and dimmed them and said she should've thought about it before the appt 😭 (I keep my brightness really low on my computer and use the warming feature 24/7 on comp and phone and my apt is really dimmed but it still helped a lot when she did it) she kept saying 'you did nothing wrong. it was the choice of others to do what they did. you don't deserve to carry their choices. you deserve to be able to hand it back to them. you don't deserve to be in pain. you did nothing wrong. you deserve to be free of what they did and you deserve to not suffer in such physical pain' I'm so wary of doctors but I really like her and I feel fortunate to have been referred to her ;3; speaking for a long time and especially emotionally is hard for me, so I might try to do two sessions a month once I find a therapist and see if I'm ok with that. trying to keep everything virtual while delta is out there I read her report and her official diagnosis is uhh really strong for major depressive disorder, severe. and severe ptsd with disassociative symptoms so!!! I claimed both of those on my disability application and the person handling my claim told me when I had this appt to call and let her know because she wanted the info. I signed a release the day I was there when I told my neuropsych that cause MH stuff is different than other medical records. she said she faxed it to the woman handling my disability application but I was gonna call her and ask if she received it and also tell her I have a new neuro so she will probably request his stuff too I called today and her voicemail box is full so lol try again later today's been awful. last night was horrible. got a bill for over $800 from my colonoscopy/endoscopy even though I asked numerous times if insurance was covering it and was told yep, every penny. so I was on the phone with insurance and the surgery center for 45 minutes. insurance seemed confused af but the agent I spoke with got some help from people who handle this stuff I guess finally she told me not to pay it, they're going to send them a letter to get it sorted (idk if this means I won't have to pay it at all or if they're going to try to make it that way. but I think govt insurance, which is what I have, works differently. like doctors kinda have to follow what they say vs. the other way around) and not worry about it for the next 30 days. I'm still gonna worry about it lmao they used a nice scare tactic on the bill that this was the 'LAST AND FINAL NOTICE' despite the fact they've never sent me anything else. my mom and the insurance agent said nah that's just what they do to scare people into paying fuckin love america <3 land of the free. the american dream! greatest country on earth 💜🖕💜 I just don't want it to go to collections and have to fight credit bureaus to get it off my credit so it's not destroyed |: anyway my head hit like 10/10 bad while I was on the phone cause of the talking a lot and trying to PROCESS INFORMATION and stress and also the fucking hold music, which I have to hear in some way b/c I gotta know when they're back on the line hnnnnn bad day. it's 1pm and bad, bad, bad day. bad month all around. I want this shit to stop anyway. I'm sorry about the suicidal ideation talk, but it's important to talk about that stuff. it can get severe but it can also get better. it does, eventually, even if it comes and goes. it always does get better I'm sorry, I also really needed to get this down somewhere. feel like I'm going to explode emotionally AND physically and I need to talk about it. hopefully

soon I'll have a therapist to talk to so I can get a lot of this stuff worked on. got my whole life to chat about so it'll probably take a long time but I'm willing to let it lmao therapy doesn't usually work for me anymore but idk I've had a lot of shit happen in less than two years so maybe it will this time I'm trying! I really am trying if you read this rambling monster, thank you. love you all and please stay safe

[seokjinsdisciple]

It’s a Deal - four

supernatural! johnny x reader x jaehyun,  mate!au

so we have SOME answers,,, but tbh they raise more questions

Word Count: 1.2k

tags: @thatonekpopsweater, @yunception, @yourchasingsunsetslove

send me a dm or an ask to be on the taglist

warnings: language, supernatural stuff, kinda angsty

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series masterlist

You sat on Jaehyun’s lap on a throne made entirely of gold. If you had told someone this yesterday, they would have been jealous. But you were considering the circumstances, and the fact that these two fae men and their stupid faces had a way of making you lower your guard, which in turn, made you get tricked. Bamboozled. Whatever other adjective that could describe the betrayal you had felt from Jaehyun. Whom you had clearly trusted too much. 

Jaehyun’s arms wrapped around your waist tightly, too tightly. It felt as though he was trying to suffocate you, a feeling that only made you more panicky. Your thoughts raced, causing you to not truly paying attention to your surroundings. What the hell had just happened. What idiotic thought had crossed through Jaehyun’s head? Was this all to make Johnny jealous? By the way his gaze was boring into the side of your face, Jaehyun’s plan had worked. If that was even his plan at all. 

You let out a sigh, willing your brain to stop thinking about this situation because it only made you more confused. You tried to focus on the present, noticing that the chatter from before was back in full swing, fae laughing and talking as if a bomb hadn’t just been dropped. You also noticed that members of the royal family had gotten from their seats. This was your chance to get some answers and confront Jaehyun. 

You stood quickly, yanking Jaehyun as hard as you could in order to drag him into the hallway behind you. Your initial shock was long gone, and rage coursed through you. 

“Jaehyun, what the FUCK?” You yelled, loud enough for him to shush you and drag you into a room nearby. 

You were ready to repeat yourself, and had a few choice words in mind for telling this stupidly handsome boy off. However, Johnny was hot on your heels. He had followed the two of you into the room, and immediately strode over to you. 

“What the hell have you done, you stupid arrogant boy,” Johnny seethed, his arm yanking you away from Jaehyun and against his own chest. He wrapped an arm tightly around your waist, as if he was afraid you were about to bolt out of the castle. Which, to be fair, had crossed your mind more than once in the span of five minutes. 

“You asked me to protect her,” Jaehyun said simply, “You never specified how.”

“Announcing her to be your wife in front of all of the foreign dignitaries we have sure as hell isn’t keeping her safe. Doyoung probably has already heard the news, and you really think he won’t hesitate to kill a mortal girl?”

“Relax brother, Doyoung wouldn’t dare do anything right now. After his failed attack this week he has lost confidence.”

“Don’t tell me to relax.” Johnny spoke, fingers digging further into your stomach. The slight pain brings you out of your thoughts and back into… well whatever was going on right now. 

“What the hell is going on?” you asked, eyes locking on Jaehyun as you pried Johnny’s hands from your waist.

“You can’t refuse me pet, you owe me, you’re indebted to me.”

You felt a growl leave Johnny’s throat at that, his arms finding their way back around your torso, despite your protests. 

“YN, where did you get the dress?” Johnny asked, carefully leveling his voice to try not to break away from you and rip Jaehyun to shreds. 

“What?” Jaehyun just smirked, “You get to make unfair deals but I can’t make one? We agreed to play a game Johnny. And you cheated. You can’t possibly expect me not to even the playing field.”

“We didn’t agree to play a game,” Johnny snarled, “You promised to help me… find her.”

You had had enough. Yes, the two men’s glares were enough to scare you, but you were getting angry at the way they were speaking about you. 

“I am not some chess piece,” you muttered, tearing yourself out of Johnny's grasp once again, “I am not some game the two of you can play or whatever. This is my life you are talking about. Protecting me is none of your concern, Johnny.”

You spun to face Johnny, your anger fueling you, “I am not your love, I am not your girlfriend, the only reason we are dating is because you tricked me. And Jaehyun, where do I even start?” you twirled on your heels, facing him.

“You can't just decide you get to marry me. I don't care what I owe you, or what debt needs to be paid. I am so fucking pissed at both of you. I may just be some dumb, weak human girl to you, but I will not just sit here and look pretty while you destroy my life.”

“Love,” Johnny tried to grab your arm, but you yanked it from his grasp. You almost, almost, felt bad for the hurt look that crossed his face. 

“I already said that I am not your love,” you glared at him, “Now one of you is taking me to that portal and BOTH of you will be leaving me the fuck alone.”

Johnny just sighed, but took your hand anyways, “Fine, I’ll take you to the portal,” he glared at Jaehyun before adding, “You and I will talk about this later.”

“Whatever brother, but you’ll miss out on my engagement party.”

Johnny started dragging you behind him with that, totally convinced you would kill his brother before he got the chance to. He still called out to the man behind him though, the mischievous smile not quite reaching his eyes,  “If I had known that's what this party was for, I wouldn’t have attended anyways.”

Johnny just smirked as you landed a hit to his shoulder, causing you to scoff as he dragged you through the halls of the palace. The two of you made your way way outside of the constricting palace walls. You had found them so beautiful when you had first arrived, but now as you gazed upon the white stone all you felt was helpless. What if you really did have to marry Jaehyun? And who the hell were they trying to protect you from?

“Johnny?” you asked, hoping that he would give you some answers, “Why’d you want Jaehyun to protect me?”

“Our kingdom is in the beginning stages of war. I figured Jaehyun being the crowned prince was the best bet to make sure you weren’t harmed. But of course the idiot did something to put you in more danger. By tomorrow every fae in these lands will know your name. And that’s dangerous.”

“I don’t understand why I would be in danger. I mean I’m just a regular girl.”

“You are anything but regular to me,” he smiled sadly, before clearing his throat and swiping his hand across the air in front of you. The portal back home opened, “Alright, well, this is your stop.”

You tried to fight the grin from your face, but you were exhausted, and frankly you were over caring what these men thought of you. You were about to go through the portal when Johnny grabbed your shoulder. 

“YN,” he started, “I’m really sorry about the bargain, and if I could take it back I would. I just thought it would help protect you. As for Jaehyun, I’ll try my best to get him to change the terms of his debt, but he’s stubborn, and faerie laws are hard to change.”

You just nodded, confused as to where this nice attitude was coming from. 

“Thank you,” you whispered, not waiting for a response before stepping into the portal in front of you.

[rogsclogs]

Some Day One Day (Brian May x Reader); part 8

some angst at the end for you all because this story has been way too fluffy so far and that just ain’t my style lmao 

enjoy :)

taglist: @brighter-thanthe-sky @im-a-sheerheartattack @fruityfreddie @discodeacygotmorerhythm @killer-queen-xo @destiel-stucky4ever-loki-queen @alfinaldelarcoiriss @warren-lauren (I’m sorry for some reason I wasn’t able to tag your other account, I hope this is fine anyway).   to be added to the tag list please message me.

Part 1 Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7  Part 9

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Y/N felt like she was living a double life, the first being her regular life when she was at school and the second being the new life she had started to create with Brian.

From 9 am to 5 pm she was old regular Y/N, who was your typical college student, and she talked to all her old friends like she always used to, even though she kept the biggest secret from them. In fact, she had not told anyone about what was going on in her private life, not even Joe knew about it, no matter how much she truly cared for him and trusted him. 

All she had told him was that she was going through some family problems and that she was staying with a friend for some time, which wasn't a complete lie after all.

Except her ‘friend’ was their professor, but that wasn't important.

Her ‘friend’ was someone she’d been building such a great relationship with every day from 5 pm until the morning. 

Her new life was exciting and terrifying at the same time, she helped him out with Emily as much as she could, picking her up from daycare and secretly taking her to get ice cream (if she promised not to tell Brian) (he actually knew but he just pretended he didn't because they were far too adorable for him to mind it), helping her get dressed in the morning and brush her teeth at night. She had become a motherly figure for Emily and she loved it, although the idea of children had never been much appealing to her in the past.

Every night her and Brian would take some time after putting Em to bed to go over all the notes she had been taking during lectures and he made sure to explain everything throughly more than once, taking small breaks in between chapters to drink some tea and make out on the couch. They had never gone any further than that and Brian wanted to, God only knows how much he wanted to, but he just wasn’t sure how to bring it up casually, without embarrassing her or making her feel like he was being pushy and desperate, so he kept to himself and tried to hide his excitement whenever they kissed, both fiscal and emotional.

Was she his girlfriend? He had no idea, they never talked about it in depth, only agreeing to keeping things between them as secret as possible, but they were pretty much living together at that point and that's all that mattered to him. 

He never wanted to let her go, and every time she told him she could go home if he had gotten tired of her, he just pulled her into his chest and kissed her so deeply that all her thoughts got lost in translation.

He had also finally grown the balls to tell her he loved her, which had first happened a couple of weeks after she told him first. Not that she minded being the only one to say it, she knew how hard it was for him to open up and let his emotions free, she was familiar with the heartbreaks and demons of his past, so she was absolutely okay with him taking his time to sort his feelings out. Needless to say, she was over the moon when he first told her he loved her after a heated make out session. She was on cloud nine.

As long as there was love between them, their relationship didn't need labels.

The only thing about them that kinda bothered Y/N was how secretive they had to be all the time.

Of course when they were both at school and she had to act like nothing more than a student she was careful, but he never wanted her to go out with him at all. If she was picking up Em after school, then he wasn’t going with her, if either of them went grocery shopping they had to go by themselves and they couldn't even go out for dinner together once in a while.

Brian was scared to death that someone from school would see them and spread the word, and that would mean losing everything they had both worked so hard for, so he wasn't willing to take any risks.

And Y/N understood, she really did, but at the same time she often felt like a prisoner because she wanted to spend all her spare time with Brian and being with him meant staying home, which got quite tough after a while.

She became more irritable and all her friends had notice a change in her attitude, especially Joe with whom she spent most of her time in school. He was so used to being made aware of mostly everything that went on in Y/N’s life that he could immediately tell when something wasn't right, and he couldn’t help but notice how stressed and tired she had been looking most of the time lately.

What he didn't know was that it wasn't just the pressure of having to retake the exam to keep her up at night, but also her anxiety about the relationship with Brian and where it was headed.

Her and Brian had even had a small argument about it, he’d lost his patience and raised his voice at her more than he’d ever done before, which obviously scared her because it was almost impossible for him to lose his patience. 

He had profusely apologized for it right after of course, plus it is normal for people who live together all the time to have discussions every once in a while, right? 

No matter what, Joe could sense something in her head was bothering her and he knew just what he needed to do to help her out.

“Hey Y/N, would you like to come to the movies with me tonight? It’s been a while since we’ve last hung out together after all and maybe it would be useful for you to go out every once in a while”.

He wasn't wrong after all. She had been so busy with her new life that she had almost forgotten how to live for herself, how to just go out for fun and not think about anything stressing her out for a while.

“Hey Joe, yeah I would love to go! Any particular movie you have in mind?”

“I was thinking of getting tickets for the new Star Wars movie if that's okay with you of course”

Y/N had not even seen the first couple of Star Wars movie and quite frankly she wasn't all that interested, but she was so happy to just be spending time with her friend and finally be a normal twenty something year old for a night that she didn't even try to question it, she would have watched any movie about anything. She just agreed, pretending to know what the saga was about and figuring she would just try not to fall asleep if the movie ended up being boring.

“Should I come pick you up at around seven?” She shivered at his question, of course he didn’t know any better but the thought alone of him picking her up from their professor’s house was horror movie worthy to her.

“No, don’t even worry about it, I’ll just get my mom to drop me off at whichever movie theatre we decide to go, it’s no big deal”.

Joe only insisted for a while before giving up on trying to argue and letting her get back to her lecture, which she knew was going to be one of the longest of her life.

Brian could tell she was in a great mood as soon as she stepped into the apartment later that day, and started questioning her about it soon enough.

“So, what's gotten you in such an amazing mood baby?”

“Joe asked me to go see the new Star Wars movie with him tonight, and I’m so happy I could cry. It’s been a while since I’ve taken some time off to be with my friends, you know”.

Brian didn't immediately figure out who she was talking about, not used to remembering his students’ first names, but then it hit him since she had briefly talked about him before.

“Joe as in Mr. Stevenson who used to attend my lectures last semester with you?”

“Well yes, but he did end up passing the test so that's why you haven't seen much of him lately. You can just call him Joe now” she laughed at the last part.

He was perplexed for some reason. It felt weird to know that she was going to go out with someone other than him, especially someone who he could tell had a crush on Y/N. He left a sudden wave of jealousy run through his veins, and he hated himself for it because after all she was free to hang out with whoever she wanted, but he couldn’t help it.

Of course he wanted her to have a good time, he just wanted her to have it with him in the comfort of his house (actually, to him it was their house by then, he considered her part of the family without a doubt).

“Wouldn’t you rather stay home with me? We can watch a movie and I can go grab us some dinner! Maybe Italian food? That's your favorite, isn't it?”

“Well, yeah, but I mean I haven't been out with Joe in so long and I honestly miss him, I’m going to be watching a movie either way, it’s just that I always do that with you”

“You don't even like Star Wars”

“It’s not that I don't like it, I have just never cared for it, but who’s to say that can't change?” She was starting to get irritated at him, after all he wasn't her father and he had no right to act so protective of her when she wasn't even doing anything that she needed protection from.

“But why won’t you just stay here with me? We have to go over some lectures from this week, you need to study for your test!” Truth is he was jealous of the kind of relationship Joe could offer her.

It was no issue for them to be seen in public together, he could take her out and make her happy any time he wanted to, and Brian couldn't. He just couldn't risk being seen by someone and he knew that it was taking a toll on Y/N, but the last thing he wanted was for her to realize that he wasn't worth the hustle and that Joe was a much better party.

“Oh come on Brian, don’t be like that! I am spending all of my free time here with you and Emily lately, and I don't mind that but sometimes I would like to go out with my friends and be normal for once”.

That last part hit Brian differently, and he felt like he was on the verge of tears.

“So you don't think our relationship is normal enough for you?”

“Of course it’s not, and you know that very well. You know, because you’re the one always telling me that we have to keep it a secret like we’re some sort of spies that work for the government or whatever. You’re the one always lecturing me on the risks of going out together and all of that, you know for a fact this isn't what a normal relationship is like”.

He didn't know what to say to that. She was right and he hated it, he wanted to be able to give her the world, but felt stuck inside a small box that he was forcing her to stay in with him, and that was a very unfair way of treating her, especially considering how much he really loved her.

“Then... then why are you still here Y/N?” 

She couldn't believe what she was hearing.

“What do you mean why am I still here?”

“Why haven't you gone back to your parents yet? Why is all of your stuff still in my apartment if you feel like you're so unhappy here?” He knew that the words coming out of his mouth were most likely untrue, but it didn't matter to the anger and sadness coming from inside of him.

“Because I love you Brian, and you know”

“Do I?” Why was he being so spiteful to her? Of course he knew she loved him, she showed him every fucking day. Why was he being so difficult? He didn't know the answer.

Y/N was left speechless after that, feeling the weight of a thousand stones drop on her heart. She didn't know where to look or how to act, afraid of setting him off even more and afraid of what he might do, after all she had never seen him that upset before. She quickly grabbed her backpack and wallet from her room, which actually used to be sort of like a storage room that Brian had redecorated for her to feel at home in, took one last look at him and left without another word being said.

[giasonesdream]

Track Your Fic’s Success on AO3

Fanfic Writing on AO3 (for ARMYS)

I'm not sure why I felt the need to make this, but I have heard writers talk about this topic before, of not getting much traction on their fics. There's a part of it that really does fall on the readers, but this is a post to maybe help get you on the right path or maybe change your perspective on the stats given to you (aka kudos, hits, comments, etc).

The 10% Idea

Basically, this is just something to keep in mind if you see that there aren't many kudos on your story.

I used to have a friend that said pretty much this: If the amount of kudos is 10% of the amount of hits you have, then it's deemed a good fic. That is to say, even if your story only gets 50 kudos out of 500 people that read it, you're in the clear.

I'll be using screenshots of my own works as example because I have a range of decently well-received stories to not well received at all.

So this one has almost exactly 10% the amount of kudos.

This, which has only a whopping 5 kudos is in the 10% (it’s actually not it’s 2am and my brain is shitting itself but I’m gonna make a point with this one regardless so leave my math error alone}

Meanwhile, this fic only has 55 kudos even though, presumably, over 2k people read it.

There are a few things that should be taken into consideration here:

THE SHIP: it's no shock to anyone -especially writers- that there are favoured ships in our fandom. Taekook and Jikook take the first place spot followed by Yoonmin (this one actually was named the top ship on all of ao3 a couple years ago!) along with yoonseok/sope maybe Namjin? This is all to say, if you write about a ship that isn't necessarily popular, not many people will read your work. That isn't to say that you should only write for certain ships. Please write what you want and what you feel! I cannot stress enough that all of this should be for fun or maybe even practice if writing is your passion.

But let’s look back at the three fics I pointed out. The first one with 400 kudos is taekook, so it had a better chance of getting seen by more people. In fact, 4k people clicked on it and potentially read that story...but the next fic with only 5 kudos is yoonmin. Aren’t they a popular ship? Why did only 100 people read it? And vhope isn’t necessarily a popular ship now (it had its time earlier on back when Rookie King came out, and the veterans for that ship are still fighting, me included!) but 2k people clicked on that and only 55 of those 2k liked it enough to leave a kudos. So, if it’s not the ship, what else could it be?

THE TAGS: tagging a story is very detrimental when posting on a site like this or any other, really. Many people like to narrow their searches down based on the criteria. Being able to filter what fics a person sees can make or break a work’s traction. My yoonmin story is a horror fic, and I’m sure there aren’t very many readers looking to get scared. As an avid reader myself, there is no denying that I -as well as many other readers- are interested in reading smut. Whether it be a one shot that’s quick and easy, or maybe it’s a slow-burn that tallies up to just being a written rom-com series, if you specify in the tags that smut is in this story, people are more willing to give it a try. For the vhope fic, I didn’t mention smut, but I did put in the tags some subgenres of smut. You can’t have “over stimulation” without sex, right? 

But, again, I feel the need to stress this: do not write smut if you are not comfortable with it! Despite the fact that a lot of us are thirsty, shameless fiends, there about just as many people that are only here for the cutesy, lovey-dovey shit. That taekook fic doesn’t have any sex in it, nor did I ever mention that there was a possibility of sex. It doesn’t go past being flirty in the span of 2k words. So, then, if a fic with a popular ship can do well without having sex in it, what else is making people click on it?

THE SUMMARY: I...am such a huge advocate for summaries. There’s a nice fine line between going into too much detail or not enough. This is why I normally go the route of putting in an excerpt from the story and then add a TLDR (Too Long Don’t Read) in the form of an “OR” followed by an incredibly oversimplified idea of what the story is about. As you can see, I didn’t do that for the yoonmin fic. I only put in an excerpt that -quite frankly- is boring narrative. The reason as to why I chose that in the first place is because the horror aspect of the fic is where any dialogue comes in- which brings me to the next point!

This could just be me, but I do tend to click on stories that have dialogue in the summary. This is going to depend on if the reader cares more about dialogue or narration, but think of the story as if it were a new movie coming out or preview to a new episode of a show. Do these videos only broadcast the actors simply moving around? No, they like to add in clips from scenes, use dialogue where you can sort of understand what the context of the scene might be, but not enough context so you’ll want to watch and see what the fuck they’re talking about.

So, if you’ve gotten to this part, you have probably realized that all I did was just tell you how you can market your writing so that more people will click on it and possibly read it all the way through. And really, these aren’t necessarily sure, guaranteed ways of becoming the next “The Fic” in our fandom, but I can assure that just taking more time to consider these aspects can allow you to contemplate what works for you as well as the audience. 

That’s that on that. The next thing I want to talk about some stuff I didn’t cover that are just as important:

Comments (and Bookmarks)

This is probably the biggest thing I ever hear/read/see artists of any sort complain about. And with good reason! As a writer, it truly does wonders to get feedback of almost any sort, even if it’s just a critique on how something was worded. Comments mean that we’re not just throwing our art out into a vast void. Effort was put into the art we created, so if you enjoyed it, effort put into commenting is much appreciated. But this isn’t another rant begging the audience to please just let us know how you felt. No, I’m here to mention that we should not let the number of kudos overshadow the interactions.

More examples. And keep in mind that taekook fic. Feel free to scroll back up and look at the amount of comments on that work. Now take a look at these:

So, 8.1k read this fic...and only 250 people liked it...but boy did this story cause some sort of reaction because people W E N T O F F! And rest assured, none of the comments were necessarily negative. The majority of them are just people being like “wha- how could they >.<”

Everything seems to be pretty even across the board. 2.6k readers, 220 kudos, about 20 or so comments (that’s excluding my replies). 

As I mentioned before, comments are so important. The taekook fic I wrote that seemed to garner enough traction where 4k people read it and 400 people liked it enough to leave a kudos, only a handful of those readers left a comment. It kinda makes me think of instagram. How strange does it look if a picture gets 10k likes but only has maybe 10 or 20 comments. Something seems a bit off, doesn’t it? I can see how this sounds entitled, but my sole purpose in bringing this up is because those numbers can be discouraging. And I want to stress how important it is to look at your works, cherish the comments you get even if the number of hearts seems low in comparison. Some of my most heartfelt comments are on that Taegi fic just above. And it makes them all the more special because this has been my favourite story to write. So even though not many have read it (whether it be because the ship isn’t popular or I didn’t do a good job of summarizing the fic where it seemed interesting) the people that clicked on an liked it felt the need to comment some absolutely amazing words. And those are the comments that should keep you going and growing.

I’ll also just add this little tidbit because it wasn’t something I noticed until recently, you should also check the bookmarks. People are able to leave comments and tags in their bookmarks, and I believe those to be extensions of comments. Not only did people feel like saving this work you wrote, but they might just let out some of their feelings in the tags, like the tags section of a tumblr post or the comment on a retweet.

There is no rule or formula that I particularly know of for getting more comments -aside from using the note section to say “let me know what you think” or “comments are always appreciated!”. I think this aspect somewhat depends on the story itself. That taekook fic I wrote is probably one of the more “cookie-cutter” things I have written. Tropes are great, they normally have a plot and formula that people can follow and know what’s going to happen. And they’re tropes for a reason: they’re common and entertaining. I know I don’t always like to go the route of writing tropes. I have accepted that the style in which I write is not always catered towards the general audience, but that is completely okay!

As I said before, this is for fun. You write because you have a story you want to tell, and you feel so passionately about it that you take the time and effort to write it. If my numbers have proven anything, it’s that your fics will find their niche. It’s always going to fit someone. And it’s important to really appreciate those that seem to like what you’re writing, even if the greater audience doesn’t vibe with it.

And that’s that on that.

So, since we’ve gone over all this, I just wanted to say that I am open to helping writers. I know this post probably isn’t the best representation, but I’m pretty damn good at spelling and grammar. I’m not a novelist, don’t have any published works floating anywhere on the New York Times Best Seller list, but I have been writing since I was seven years old. With fifteen years of experience and having worked with authors in the past on potential books, I am always more than happy to pass on any knowledge I have gained over the years. If it’s wording something to make it flow better, trying to fill any plot holes or answer questions of character motivations, of if you should be using “there”, “they’re”, or “their”, I would love to help. All ya gotta do is message me :)

*mic drop*

[gabbyzvolt25]

-Rules:pick nine characters that you relate to from any media and tag nine people.

Tagged by @reaganthebird

1) Jupiter from Planetary Moe.

I love small cute things. 

Softe boi deluxe.

I’m dating a short. (I mean he isn’t canonically dating anyone short but short ppl are canonically his type??Also I swear it’s at least hinted that he feels some type of shit for Mercury like. And frankly I can relate Mercury is a qt.) 

I smile when I get annoyed. 

Scary deathglares. 

Okay like. One of my friends told me when she first saw me she was afraid to approach me because I looked scary?? <”0D

Also I legit have his hairstyle now it isn’t debatable I can style it JUST LIKE HOW I DRAW HIS HAIR.

I say weird shit to ppl I have a crush on. (I’m also more likely to tell those people abotu my got dam sin.)

Just like how Jupiter attracts comets/asteroids/moons/etc. I attract cats?? Or rather my house does but Chester ignored some basic hoes to cross a busy street to follow me home so I mean???

A red birthmark. (His beign the Great Red Spot and mine being the one on me foot.)

Clumsy fuck who breaks shit. (And feels bad abt it.) 

Scared of hurting things. (I once struggled to pick up a mouse because I didn’t want to hurt it.)

Childish ho.

What’s personal space? If I like you I’m glued to your side.

Can’t fuckign cook.

2) Sans from Undertale

I’m thin enough to make jokes about being a skeleton.

Depressed.

Smol.

I fucking love puns so much.

I love hearing people groan or say stop in response to puns.

Sarcastic af.

Lazy (but not actually lazy.)

Sleeps a lot/long af.

I used to eat ketchup sandwiches when I was like 8 and younger or smth? Gross shit tbh it was just ketchup on some bread. P close to chuggin’ ketchup if you ask me.

3) Dave Strider from Homestuck

I too had a period where I struggled with my sexuality. (Both in going ‘oh shit i’m not attracted to 1 gender (guys)’ and also a period where I went 'holy shit i can be asexual because i can feel romantic shit without wanting to fuck.’ So not quite the same as Dave but it applies.)

Self esteem? Don’t know her.

Childhood abuse. Though, Dave’s was much, much worse than mine, and most of the abuse I’ve had to deal with has been emotional/verbal.

Dick jokes.

Drawing shitposty comics.

Says fuck a lot.

Likes music from things/groups/artists that no one (in my irl setting at least) recognizes/knows.

Apple juice good slormp.

4) Karkat Vantas from Homestuck

Says fuck a lot.

Acts like I’m a badass who will fight but I’m really just a pussy.

Talks a lot of smack for someone who can’t fucking fight.

Shit self esteem.

Worried ppl will find out shit about me that would be harmful info for them to know. (People finding out I’m trans vs. Karkat’s blood colour.)

Leader of my internet squad.

Leader complex.

Shouty.

Is really creative with insults.

Blood aspect.

Gets angry easily.

5) Venus from Planetary Moe

Was a tomboy when I ID’d as female; still say fuck gender roles though.

Hates dresses.

Leader. (P sure it was said somewhere that she’s the most likely to be a good leader or something.)

Will freak out/cry if forced into a dress.

Can’t deal with bullshit.

I feel like there’s enough canon shit to imply she’s ace tbh? 

Hates being touched. (By people I don’t know.)

Again. Cant fucking cook.

6) Mercury from Planetary Moe.

A smol boi.

Another soft boi deluxe.

Hates when ppl say I look girly.

Forgets people’s names when I don’t talk with them often.

Forgets people’s FACES if I don’t talk with them often.

Forgets about people I don’t interact with in general..

Is hard to be made into your close friend chummy chum who will send u p much anything about my life, but once I am in that spot I’m loyal as fuck.

Looks mean but really isn’t. (Just has resting bitch face, a little bit.)

YET ANOTHER CHARACTER I RELATE TO WHO CAN’T. FUCKING. COOK!!!

7) Tails from Sonic

Was bullied when I was younger.

Is smart.

YET ANOTHER CUTE SOFTE BOI DELUXE.

High pitched bois. ;o(

To also want to fly high so I can reach the highest of all the heavens.

This scene. (Starts at 9:12.) Especially with the hand gesture at the end like. Kill ‘em Tails.

Always willing to help others.

Tails’ colour is v close to my favourite colour like this boi is a good boi.

Mint is unproblematic fav.

Hates feeling useless and ignored.

Gets v angry if someone insults my abilities.

Supports, loves, and cares for all my friends.

My name is also a pun. (Miles Prower (miles per hour) = bcuz he’s in a game where speed is key. Gabby = I’m talkative af.)

8) Sailor Moon 

Okay I haven’t watched Sailor Moon and it’s something I need to do but from what I can tell she’s a crybaby, loves video games, loves eating, and loves sleeping and tbh that’s enough for me.

9) Cream the Rabbit from Sonic

I can do a perfect Cream impression I’m p sure lmao. I kinda ran out of ideas. Idk probably also because I’m sweet and polite?

@bloodlily16 @coolsonicrules @freckleddanijesus @mandaka @pseudomiracles @snake-the-fleshboy @nori-in-the-house @juicyjyushis @vulpesradical

[boyjadzia]

omg sara @shinelikeastarlight tagged me to do this super long tag game hlep

tagging: @void-for-president, @the-alexandrian-alchemist, @starboysisko, @magnmite, @yacobeanreign (of course only if y’all want)

last text sent: "cool [thumbs up emoji]”

list three favourite colours: ???? don’t do this to me

what time did u wake up at today: 11am, it’s reading period don’t judge me what were u doing last night at midnight: playing drunk rock band name something you can’t wait for: this godforsaken quarter to be over when was the last time u saw ur mother: over winter break/new year’s one thing u wish u could change abt ur life: the crippling depression/abandonment issues are getting kinda old, I’d like to feel like I have a stable community/family who love and support me whats getting on ur nerves rn: the discourse favourite tv shows: star trek (all of them but esp DS9), idk I’m sort of obsessed with yuri on ice at the moment, those two are the main ones tbh? first best friend: my girl India who doesn’t have a tumblr but we’ve been best friends since we met on the playground at age 5. our moms are also tight. listening to rn: nothing, the sound of my laptop fan straining to keep my computer from bursting into flame

3 fears: never having a group of people I feel I can call family, never being in love, cavities

4 turn ons: self-awareness/humility, being sensitive about & respectful of my dysphoria, trust/willingness to be vulnerable, being honest & vocal about what you like 4 turn offs: being boring, being insensitive/distant, not being conscientious about how you interact with my body (i.e. assuming you can just treat my body the same way you’d treat a woman’s body and that’s a-ok), heterosexuality of any kind sexual orientation: gay tbh senior year quote in my year book: oh god some generic hillary clinton quote about feminism I don’t even wanna remember it first thing i notice in a person: ?? what they look like? shoe size: 7M/9W (US) eye colour: hazel hair colour: brown favourite item of clothing: probably my leather jacket, close runners up are my high-waisted black jeans that look good with pretty much anything and my crop top that says “I got to second base at Jonah’s bar mitzvah, January 7th 1978″ what colour of underwear i’m wearing rn: blue/brown/white stripes favourite season: whichever one has like 60-70F weather, used to be summer but now that’s spring lol how much time i spent on designing my blog: not much I just picked a theme the reason i joined tumblr: this is pretty sad but... I wanted to make friends do i ever get “good morning” or “goodnight” texts: only if I’m like talking to someone right before going to bed when did i last hold hands: don’t remember how long does it take me to get ready in the morning: depends, anywhere from 10 minutes to an hour have i shaved my legs in the past 3 days: LMAO try the last 4 years where am i rn: on my couch do i like music loud or at a reasonable level: reasonable, loud noises are scary 3 things i love: my friends, dogs, idk earth? how i feel rn: I need to gtf to sleep lol something i rlly, rlly want: to feel like I don’t have to radically change my body to be attractive to the people I want to attract 3 things that upset me: feeling like I’m hurting or burdening other people, straight men trying to hit on me, the persistent feeling that being transmasc somehow makes me a bad person what i find attractive in other ppl: appreciating subjects other than your field of study, confidence, ambition, someone who’s accomplished interesting things in their life, being friendly, genuine & not condescending 3 habits i have: staying in bed all day on days when I don’t have to do anything, only eating part of my lunch during lunch time and eating the rest for dinner, carrying off ridiculous amounts of free food from events something i fantasize abt: feeling comfortable and secure in my attractiveness vis a vis how my body looks, and in my presence in gendered spaces something im talented at: singing, memorization, embarrassing myself the blog i give the most notes to: idk, probably sara tbh last person re-blogged sth from me: I haven’t checked my notifications in a while o_0 do  i smoke/drink: I drink with friends my favourite food: I’m a big fan of things with cheese in them. also guacamole. my favourite dessert: it really depends ugh I guess cake? what i did yesterday: had my last day of classes, went to work, went to an award ceremony/opening gala for an integrated DNA technologies sponsored exhibit at the field museum (it was so fancy I felt so grown up and fancy), went to kat’s birthday party number of kids i want: ???? number of siblings i have: none something thats constantly on my mind: trangst (trans angst)

last person i messaged on tumblr: teddy (void-for-president) can i drive: nope :/ what state or part of the world do i live in: Chicago, from Brooklyn am i in school: 3rd year undergrad do i get grossed out easily: not generally, but certain specific things will do it (ex. dead animals especially FISH) somewhere i would like to visit for a week: hm maybe go back and see Alaska again? check on that mountain biking trail I helped build in 10th grade i’ll love u if: make an effort to spend your free time with me/take the initiative in telling me that you value my being in your life last show i binge-watched: I binged legend of korra over winter break, probably that what words upset me the most: idk I guess people telling me I’m wrong for existing in the spaces that I occupy? what words make me feel best abt myself: when people tell me they value having me in their lives and that I make them feel good about themselves a wish that i’ve wished for repeatedly on 11:11: that’s not a thing that I do :/ who i would switch lives with for a day: idk maybe someone who’s already gone on T and sings just so I could get a sense of what the voice change is like for a singer? or like. a famous celebrity or something. my favourite ice cream: green tea I think? allergies: minor allergy to raw eggplant I think, every time I eat undercooked eggplant my mouth starts to feel like it’s swelling up, not like my throat is being blocked off but just my mouth starts to hurt quite noticeably sexiest person to come to mind immediately: alskdjfsldk this is really hard uhh uhhh ok see my first thought is like star trek characters but I can’t say that ok let’s go with john boyega he’s gorgeous and seems like a ray of sunshine my childhood career choice: biologist! one of my insecurities: that being transmasc nonbinary and still participating in some women’s spaces/not letting go of some aspects of womanhood makes me a bad person and specifically is harming transfeminine people how many blogs am i following: just over 100 I think how many tabs/different windows do i have open at this very moment: 2 windows, this is the only tab open in this window because my internet sucks and tumblr is a monster website, the other window has 13 tabs coke or pepsi: not super into either, I guess coke although my aunt used to work for pepsi so I should be loyal tea or coffee: tea movie or book: movie probably, I don’t actually read that much it’s embarrassing, although frankly I don’t really watch movies that much either a sense i would be willing to lose: none omg! I guess if I had to pick taste? since taste is mostly smell anyway quote i live by: I don’t really? type of accessory i wear the most: does the leather jacket count? otherwise none last awkward situation i found myself in: I kept trying to pet eva’s dog today but I just ended up scaring her what time is it rn: way too late

a song that made me cry: hallelujah by leonard cohen, not actually, just like made me v emotional (yes I’m thinking abt that yiddish cover) first song u ever sang at karaoke: are we talking like legit karaoke at a karaoke place or like hanging out in my best friend from middle school’s basement singing along with her CD of karaoke tracks for the hottest hits of the mid-2000s bc I don’t remember the former but the latter was definitely sk8r boi