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darlingbudsofrae · 3 years ago

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Neil Josten Appreciation Post

Foxes Appreciation Series : 1 || 2 || 3 || 4 || 5 || 6 || 7 || 8 || 9 || 10 ||

Alright, let’s just start this by addressing the big elephant in the room: everyone loves Neil Josten. EVERYONE.

If you don’t, you’re lying.

Okay, first up- I’m glad this is getting addressed more on AFTG tumblr but Neil is literally so much smarter than the fandom gives him credit for.

Like yes, he’s a little dumdum on the social aspect of things (you could argue he kind of has a low EQ but also not really, I would argue that later)

but that doesn’t dismiss that he is smart af and that he can kill you and make it look natural if he wants.

For example, he literally outrun and hid from the mafia for years. Like, that in itself is an obvious point but we often forget that he did this at a very young age.

Like, he was presumably what? 16?? (when Mary kicked the bucket?) And kid was already playing hide and seek pretty well with a freaking mafia.

He does not get enough credit for this.

The survival skills it takes- the mental strength to survive as a runaway and technically he’s also homeless- at freaking 16, that’s just insane.

Also, let’s not mention the fact that it takes skills to forge official papers and all that.

We also do not talk enough about Neil and how he freaking have to relearn an entirely new position just to play exy.

I don’t think most remember that he’s actually a backliner, but have to play as a striker because it was the only available position in that local high school he attended in Millport, and that was how Kevin saw him so he was recruited as a striker.

We also additionally do not talk enough about how Kevin “literal and figurative Son of Exy” Day found potential for court in Neil “I’m a backliner but I’m playing striker because it’s the only thing available and I’m an exy junkie” Josten who only played it for like a year or less.

Like yeah, Kevin said he needs more training but it’s not even Neil’s official position.

The talent on this man- I cannot, he is such an icon.

Aside from his great survival skills and being literally great at picking things up- he’s also like freaking academically smart.

Like that also doesn’t get enough credit- I mean, he does math for fun.

Frankly, I think if you did Kumon or if you had an awesome teacher you could also do math for fun (I know I did) but this should be noted with the fact that he didn’t have proper schooling.

He went on a run at a really young age so there is no way he received formal education.

Which means he is naturally like really smart.

He’s also a polyglot. And the languages he has under his belt are all freaking difficult to learn- like, no kidding: French, German, and he can assumingly speak intermediate Spanish, and we don’t even have an idea if this is all the languages he can speak.

Also, he and Andrew learns how to speak Russian, right? Like, that’s crazy.

The brain on this man and the power that he has- my son, I am so proud.

I mean, for all we know- there’s more than that and the fact that he’s like 18 at TFC screams supremacy.

This is where I argue about his EQ but Neil is crazy perceptive.

It took him like freaking 3 seconds to figure out the team dynamics the foxes have, and how to work against it.

He later figured out how to make it all mesh together.

Like the way he do things isn’t conventional but reading him analyze his team despite his lack of empathy really makes me shudder.

Like, this kid is so freaking smart. I remember reading his thought process for the very first time and being like, okay- I definitely did not think about that.

The main problem with his EQ though is that he doesn’t know how to process positive stuff when he’s involved, but when he’s the outsider- his perspective is so amazing.

Like again, he kind of lacks empathy but the way he understands things and is just so sharp is just noteworthy.

I’d argue he doesn’t understand social cues and “modern teen things” but he isn’t so completely clueless on the social aspect in general as to not manipulate an entire team of misfits with issues to work together.

He’s literally the key to unity in AFTG. Even Dan says so.

Also, the way he puts things into play- like he’s a master manipulator, and I love that for him.

We do not talk enough about manipulative Neil, like I just really love manipulative characters in general so much- especially if they’re just owning it.

I mean, he freaking manipulated Andrew and Aaron into therapy. Kind of evil but also wow. (just a sidenote, please don’t force people into therapy lol)

Going completely dark for a second, Neil also has a freaking high pain tolerance.

The amount of horrible things he went through in the books were just so sad and the fact that he just kind of moves on from it? That’s just completely oh my gods.

My poor summer child, even if you can kill me at any given time, let me just hug you for a second with consent.

Everyone also gives shit about Neil’s fashion choices and granted it is said he kind of bags the homeless looks but the fact that he values utility above all else-

Yes, we stan a resourceful king.

Lowkey though, am I the only one who appreciate Neil’s average style?

Speaking of style- I love the way Neil narrates. Like, the way he doesn’t give much attention to how the character looks- it’s just so realistic?

Because if I’m talking to a person in real life, there is no way I am noting how his blue polo makes him kind of casual but clean-cut and how his brown eyes is as warm as my morning coffee. Like, who even does that?

The thing with Neil’s narration is that it’s just so authentic- like it easily engages the readers and the way he gives importance to every thing the same way, it really makes it easier for the reader to discern things objectively, y’know what I mean?

He just has that quality in a main character and narrator- he’s laidback and sarcastic but not trying too hard, and he’s just really easy to love.

Like, I normally don’t like narrators/main characters in books because I favor a side character more or just because they’re annoying, but Neil Josten is legit lovable.

At the same time, he’s also a really well-written character. Like, for all the technicalities I point out in AFTG, Neil is an asshole. He’s not perfect and I don’t 100% love everything that he does and I love that.

He’s a flawed character but he gives you something to root for- and I just really want to appreciate his characterization for a second. Most books make their characters’ flaws not even their fault to put a check to the flawed character but at the same time still have that perfect character. Eeww, no- give me real flaws to work with.

He’s one of the realest protagonists I ever read.

Like people give him shit for wanting to hide but also choosing to play a nationwide-discerned sport on an infamous collegiate team but for me it’s kind of realistic.

Because I think we, as human beings, also do things we love too much regardless of logic. I don’t know, like it’s kind of funny the way Neil is written but I honestly didn’t see him joining Palmetto as a loophole.

Like, just think of all those successful people who hid their identities via pseudonym or other necessary means to do things they weren’t expected to do or weren’t allowed to do.

For me, his character was really just looking for excuses to play his favorite sport a second longer and if anything, that’s just kind of sad.

But also, his dedication and love to exy is really admirable- like I never understood it but the way he literally does everything to stay on the court for a second longer just makes me want to root for him.

On a random note, Neil may not have an eidetic memory like Andrew’s but the way he memorize most phone numbers by heart?

Bruh, I don’t even have my phone number memorized and I freaking have it for two years now.

He also memorizes every twists and turns at every trip, every exits at a room he enters, and most people’s tics upon the first meeting, and other things and that’s just crazy perceptive but also really crazy on another level.

Also, we don’t get much ace/demi representation and out of the few I’ve consumed, demi Neil Josten validates me. He’s legit my favorite character that belongs in the ace spec in books.

I just really love Neil’s character so much- he’s just so amazing.

One thing I always appreciate about Neil Josten is that while he’s not a total angel (sadly), the way he loves the foxes- like he legit tried to mend the team and make sure everyone is going to be okay before walking straight to his death- like I’m with Andrew on this one, what a fucking martyr. Why are you like this and why am I crying?

Neil Josten is by all means not soft, that much is established, but the way he’s just still as precious and must be protected at all costs-

"You know, I get it," Neil said. "Being raised as a superstar must be really, really difficult for you. Always a commodity, never a human being, not a single person in your family thinking you're worth a damn off the court—yeah, sounds rough. Kevin and I talk about your intricate and endless daddy issues all the time."

I love him, your honor- where can I file this adoption papers and do I have anything else to sign?

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chainofclovers · 3 years ago

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Ted Lasso 2x8 thoughts

I am so lucky that the creators of Ted Lasso decided to make this entire show specifically for me. #blessed

If last week felt like a bit of breathing room (albeit tense, poignant, character-progressing breathing room) with distinct narrative lines, this week’s episode was a chaotic yet tightly-written swirl of pain and hope and sadness! No neat subject headers for this one, y’all. Just my brain and heart in the inadequate form of a bulleted list. It is the medium available to me at this time.

I am going to remember the moment when Ted calls Sharon and tells her his father killed himself for the rest of my life.

(I could say a bunch of stuff about his face and what he says and how he tries to hide his tears from Beard right after and how insanely much I adore this character and ahhhhhhhh but I’m just going to leave that scene there in our collective memories.)

Jamie. JAMIE. Higgins has given some great advice about love on this show, but his musings about his up-and-down relationship with his own father were not helpful in the context of Jamie’s dad, who is an abusive piece of shit. I really adore that all of the main AFC Richmond staff members are realistically a bit hit-or-miss with their advice and life philosophies (some are mostly miss this season, of course).

And I am completely in awe of the moment when Jamie punches his father. The way he just stands there after Beard kicks his dad out of the locker room. The way you can hear a pin drop. And Roy—Roy who is learning in so many areas of his life about his influence on people, learning that the things he needs aren’t necessarily the same as the things other people need—is the one to cross the room and hug him. Hold him, really, with the tenderness Ted used when he hugged Rebecca outside the gala in 1x4. God.

I’ve thought a lot about how s1 was about giving people a soft place to land. There’s always an angel there when you need one. There’s always an opportunity to be kind. If you look for someone, you find them. If you look for the good in someone, you find the good. And as everyone works through their individual journeys in s2, that can’t always be the case anymore. But there are still so many moments of angels on this show, and it’s not about chance and serendipity and fate [not that it was about that in s1] but about the effort it takes to become someone who can be there for someone else. Or who can be there for yourself. I’m so proud of Jamie for physically fighting back against his father. I’m so proud of Roy for being the one who recognized what Jamie needed.

I have every feeling in the world about how Ted is almost totally frozen both times (s1 and s2) he witnesses Jamie’s father abusing him. In s1, he was still there for Jamie after, and I have every reason to believe he’ll be there for Jamie after this incident as well, but that frozen stance HURTS. He’s in so deep with his pain about his own father that it’s like he physically cannot snap out of it to act in the moment. It seems entirely outside of his control, and it breaks my heart, because Ted wants so badly to be a good father, a good coach, a good friend, a good partner, a good patient. He’s there for people in all kinds of ways, even in his current less-than-capable state. He takes care of Sharon post-concussion and even gets her a new bike! During the disastrous match at Wembley his coaching is ineffectual and everything is chaos but he’s the last one standing on the pitch! But this really awful thing keeps happening to Jamie and Ted is just…frozen in the face of it. Like one of those nightmares where you’re running in place.

The frozen-in-place nightmare also kind of applies to the way the total separation between Ted and Rebecca feels, too. I have never for a moment doubted the writers’ intentions in setting these characters up as soulmates on parallel journeys, and I’m actually really digging (on a story level) how disconnected they are right now. It is IMPRESSIVE that their absence in each other’s lives feels like such a glaring loss, one we cannot forget even as there are so many other things happening onscreen. It is 100% not just shipper goggles making me process information about Ted while thinking about Rebecca and information about Rebecca while thinking about Ted. I know there are a lot of really angry and frustrated people in the fandom right now (both T/R shippers and T/R antis and non-shipping fans who don’t get why s2 is different from s1) and while I understand being frustrated by choices characters make, and frustrated by the feelings the show makes us feel that we just want to feel more of or less of, I continue to agree with pretty much every narrative choice happening right now.

Agreeing with the narrative like this?! This is such a unique experience for me as a viewer—to feel like I’m on a ride that is at once absolutely wild and incredibly sensible and well-crafted, and to feel simultaneously completely invested and anticipatory and speculative but also totally willing to trust where it goes. I long for Ted and Beard to really talk. I long for Ted and Rebecca to stop missing each other. I long for Roy to have a serious conversation with Ted about what’s happening with him. I long for Keeley to find a vocation, something that drives her beyond her projects. I long for so many things! But I wouldn’t long for them if this show was less good. If the show was less good, I wouldn’t have a wish list a mile long because I wouldn’t be so attuned to the details and potential lurking in every scene. THIS IS SUCH A GOOD SHOW, I CANNOT HANDLE IT, I LOVE IT SO MUCH.

(To that end, a great deal of the Ted Lasso tag and so many Twitter reactions reactions to the show feel super stressful right now and I am kind of just trying not to look?! I love this fandom so much because of the amazing conversations that happen and because of brilliant fic and because there are some awesome people I never would have encountered were it not for this show. That little bubble is wonderful and I’d stay in this fandom no matter what in order to keep experiencing those things. But fans’ catastrophic reactions to every little thing that happens, every little choice a character makes that isn’t the “perfect” choice? The takeaway that the writers—on this show of all shows—wake up in the morning ready for another day of torturing shippers rather than another day of writing a beautiful story they genuinely want to write? I do not enjoy those parts at all. I would like to opt out of those parts. I’m having such a magical experience watching this show and talking about this show and listening about this show and writing about this show with a variety of people who feel all kinds of ways. I truly wish I could somehow transfer the energy of this experience onto all the people who are hating it right now. I don’t mind at all that people are having vastly different reactions to this show and are sharing their honest feelings, including the really angry ones (I can appreciate something and disagree with it!), and I get that sometimes the language of fannish reactions is intentionally, ironically hyperbolic. But there feels like this very serious trend of people legitimately thinking writers on this show are targeting shippers and have lost respect for their characters, and I just feel like an alien from another planet when I see that stuff. I guess I just feel like people make art because they want their art to be visible to other people and to themselves, but that doesn’t typically involve specifically catering to or torturing a subset of that audience?)

I am more fascinated by Sharon Fieldstone than ever before. I have been running through every single action with her and Ted so many times. The confirmation that she’s living in club-provided housing (that could not look more different from Ted’s club-provided flat). Ted clearly noticing the many bottles. Sharon’s face while she tries to casually recycle them. (Sharon could legitimately have a more problematic relationship with alcohol than Ted does, and I find that extremely interesting and am very curious to find out what happens there.) Sharon leaving him voice notes while she’s concussed, probably because she’d been thinking about him shortly before the accident. The way Ted calls her and does all the funny voices and it’s not frustrating like all the times he uses his silliness and allusions to deflect during their prior conversations because this time, those behaviors are just a part of him showing care for another person. The way they stretch each other, and Ted is still wrong about the things he’s been wrong about, but they both grow all the same.

While it is pretty much impossible for me to imagine that this show would include an actual romantic relationship between Ted and Sharon (it would be beyond unethical even if they could write it well, and Sharon in particular is so professional and committed to her work, and it would erase so much of the powerful message about the importance of seeking therapy from a professional who is not your friend or partner, and I would totally hate it), watching this episode was the first moment I had this queasy little feeling that it’s possible that Ted could end up developing really complicated feelings about Sharon since, at this point, he’s been honest with her about things he’s hardly spoken about before and you can really form an attachment to people you feel safe with in a new way. (I mean, I’m sure Michelle knows what happened with Ted’s father, but I’m not even certain if Beard does.) He’s so broken right now, and Sharon is such a great person and so different from anyone else in his life (even though Rebecca is also different, and Beard is also different, and Roy is also different, and so on), that I could see things getting really fuzzy for him. I continue to have faith in the way the storylines on this show are handled. I’m just. Putting this here.

(In saying that, though, I also wanna make it really clear that I don’t just automatically assume anytime a new female character is introduced that they’re going to end up becoming a romantic complication. Like, Phoebe is allowed to have a teacher who is an attractive woman and AFC Richmond is allowed to have a sports psychologist who is an attractive woman and Keeley is allowed to talk to Jamie Tartt without it threatening what she has with Roy and all these people can exist as human beings without the introduction of romantic drama.)

Isaac gives every player one haircut per season, OH MY GOD. The JOY during the haircut scene. YES.

KEELEY AND REBECCA. Their text thread. The affirming video call right before Rebecca goes into the restaurant. The way Keeley sits all snuggled up against Rebecca in her office.

I was pretty thoroughly spoiled for the Sam and Rebecca plot through 2x8, and I was bracing for something far more problematic and tortured than what happens in this episode. The words I would use to describe their scenes: awkward, cute, cringy, and understandable. There are a million reasons why this relationship isn’t sustainable, but I felt completely understanding of both their choices here. This show has a lot of thesis statements, but I keep going back to the idea from 2x1 that there are people who enter your life to help you get to the next point, and I think it’s entirely possible that Sam and Rebecca will mutually be that for each other.

I find comparisons between Rupert and Rebecca super upsetting. There are absolutely meaningful things to say about the irony of ending up in a situation with an uncomfortable resemblance to certain taboo elements of an ex’s situation. But that ex is abusive and manipulative and cruel and Rebecca has exhibited NONE of those behaviors, and it makes me really sad to think that people feel that the writers on this show have betrayed Rebecca in giving her this storyline.

As always, I reserve the right to keep blathering about this show. I’ve had a headache for a couple of days, but my head is also so full of 2x8 thoughts that I couldn’t keep them in even if the circumstances for writing this were not ideal. I kind of hate that I’ve included frustrated fandom thoughts within the analysis of what I felt was an absolutely gorgeous, complicated, heartbreaking, near-perfect episode of television, but if ya can’t be a little dramatic on your own tumblr while you’re feeling raw and under the weather, where can ya?

#ted lasso #ted lasso s2 spoilers #meta by me #ted lasso 2x8 #a lesbian watches ted lasso #cw: suicide mention #cw: alcohol abuse mention

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luxshine · 4 years ago

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The Great Supernatural Rewatch Project - Salvation

I started writting this in the middle of season 13 but RL and work and some mental health issues made me take a step back from fandom in general and well, I was also fearing this would be an unending job since the series JUST.KEPT. GOING.

However, now that the series is done (And omg, what a clusterfuck that was. My tallies are going to go insane if I get there) and thus there’s an ending in sight, I will do my best to finish season 1, and try and get the rest of the seasons in a more timely manner. Say, before they do the inevitable reunion and ignore the last episode completely.

(I’m going to be honest, part of the problem was that Supernatural used to be SO good back then, and when I see the new episodes I weep a bit inside. I can’t believe they were so much better at creating story arcs when they weren’t TRYING to create story arcs)

Of course, now we all know that Dean’s plots in general will not have a happy ending no matter what, and that makes that particular tally bittersweet. But there are STILL people who claim that nope, Dean was never mistreated by the writers and well, Jack damn it, I am not going to let that claim go without bringing numbers to the table. Hopefully, it won’t take me 15 years to finish (Because by then, I would be the only one caring I guess)

In any case, last lap for Season 1 and we begin with Salvation.

General stuff

A specific reason for me having rage quitted this episode in particular for so long: For some stupid copyright thing with Netflix, they don’t have Carry On My Wayward Son as the song for the final recap –at least in Netflix Latam. And Supernatural without Carry On My Wayward Son is no Supernatural. So I had to hunt my DVDs. Then my computer DVD player died. Then I decided to make 5 webcomics at the same time. THEN I decided to start doing illustration works, and three other projects and let’s just say I am a bit of a workaholic and leave it like that as the rest is not SPN-related.

Ahem.

Funny thing about the Road so Far –you know, besides being a LOT shorter than the ones we’re getting now- is that it focuses a lot more on DEAN at the beginning, while if you watch the show, well, we know most of those Dean scenes come from MoW episodes and not the actual mytharc. Another interesting thing is that if one believes those things to be chronological, it makes it as if the Colt had been with the brothers for a lot longer than half an episode, and that Sam’s issue with the visions is not that recent. Edition Magic everyone! Also, omg, they were babies when the series started, and how WEIRD is to see John looking at them with pride and smiling at Dean at some points.

Anyway, the recap and the epicness that is Carry On my Wayward Son ends and we start the actual plot.

Hello Pastor Jim. Goodbye Pastor Jim. And here Supernatural begins the long, long tradition of killing characters who could’ve been useful later on, and more importantly, that could’ve been the boys’s support system later on. While here it’s understandable since we need to show how dangerous and vicious Meg is –ah, irony that in about 8 seasons people will be rooting for her Redemption- it also makes the Hunters kind of useless. I mean, he has all that weaponry and only uses a knife? Sigh. Really, a waste. Pastor Jim as a concept was really intriguing –and I don’t think we’ve heard of any other hunter who was also a priest. Funny, when we have so many demons free now. There’s also the fact that when Pastor Jim claims that she can’t be in the church because it’s hallowed ground, she replies that “That might work with the minor leagues, but not with her” and I wonder… did we ever got a demon that couldn’t enter a church? Because right now out of the top of my head I can’t remember, and yet Pastor Jim was surprised but later no one seems to think it weird there were signs of demonic activity around his body. Another sign that, as engaging as the series was, once we start digging the world building, things fall apart very quickly.

Actually, if I may digress for a bit, here we have the very first look at Supernatural´s second biggest problem: killing support characters that may have been useful lately. Here it is because Kirkpe had this weird idea that Hunting would never be glamorized by the show/fandom and it would be a completely miserable and lonely existence. He also didn’t think that the series would survive past season 2. So, ok, killing the guy we only knew by throw away lines didn’t seem so bad. By season 13 every single recurring character had died at least once –and there were petitions to bring back I think every one of those who haven’t come back- it’s a big problem.

As I restarted writing, I also realized that the mere existence of Pastor Jim and his room of awesome research and weapons creates a problem in the future about the Men of Letters because… ok, so ONE member of the clerigy knew enough about demons and stuff to be a hunter and have THE Hunter as his main contact (John Winchester was sort of a legend back then. And he had also fell out of contact with many others so the fact that he and Pastor Jim were still friendly? Kind of interesting), but what about the rest? Did the Vatican have any contact with the British men of Letters or the American ones? And if so, what the hell did they think when suddenly ALL the Men of Letters disappeared? Ok, so that’s a lot of stuff that doesn’t matter right now as it won’t actually exist until much, much, MUCH latter, but see what I mean when I say that they didn’t plan anything and the lack of a series bible hurts the show more than it helped it thrive? I am realizing right now I could write a whole treaty on the Men of Letters and their non-relationship with hunters ONLY using this cold beginning and the Henry Winchester episode.

But this is not the time for that, so we get our title card and a very, VERY young Jeffrey Dean Morgan.

We move to John who is explaining off camera everything he knows about Yellow Eye´s plan. We can tell it´s not much as he thinks it came out of hibernation and that the whole attacking families is part of a cycle, but back then it was impressive how much he had managed to find out about this demon. We also know that it attacks exactly when the baby in the house is six months old, which brings us to this little jewel:

JOHN It starts in Arizona, then New Jersey, California. Houses burned down to the ground. It's going after families, just like it went after us.

SAM Families with infants?

JOHN Yeah. The night of the kid's six-month birthday.

SAM I was six months old that night?

JOHN Exactly six months.

SAM So basically, this demon is going after these kids for some reason. The same way it came for me? So Mom's death...Jessica. It's all because of me?

DEAN We don't know that Sam.

SAM Oh really? Cause I'd say we're pretty damn sure Dean.

DEAN For the last time, what happened to them was not your fault.

SAM Right. It's not my fault but it's my problem.

DEAN No it's not your problem it's our problem!

Now, in the following seasons we will know that yes, it was ALL about Sam. But right now, the characters and the viewers don´t know that. We know that a lot of families were killed by the demon (That at this point was still “The demon” and wouldn´t become Azazael until later), and that he doesn´t take the children. So… how did Sam leap from “this demon attacks families with 6 month old children” to “It´s all about ME!”? He even ignores that Dean and John lost Mary for his last line, when he decides it´s his problem and not their problem. Also, and this is important for the “Dean is the most awful person to Sam” crowd… Dean immediately tells Sam that no, it´s not his fault. While he could harbor some ill feelings against Sam –and demon Dean, 8 seasons later, will voice them- at this point he is 100% on Sam´s side. There’s also a sideway glance from John to DEAN when Sam claims that everything is about him, and then I wonder exactly why, if John knew all about the fact that the demon chased six month old children specifically, he never resented Sam over it. One would think that given John’s love for Mary and deep desire to revenge, Sam would really be the outcast and the one only treated like a soldier (as he claims he was, but not really as we’ve seen), instead of Dean who was completely blameless in the whole thing.

(Also, this is the first time we see that Azazael´s plan didn´t make much sense IF we believed that Kirkpe had everything planned. But that´s a discussion for another time)

Anyway, John interrupts the argument to explain that while he has no idea what the demon is after (Another thing that later would be contradicted as he knew Sam had powers), but that he has managed to figure out his pattern of attack to the point that it even repeated it for Jessica’s killing (Even if much, much later, we’ll learn that it wasn’t Azazael the one who killed her, and Demons would completely forego the signs when attacking. Have I mentioned I miss the times when the myths made sense?) and the three of them pack up for their first real hunt together as they decide they will save the next baby on the demon’s list, in a town named Salvation.

Important thing to note: when John recites the demon signs, Dean immediately replies “that happened in Lawerence”. He remembers, quite clearly, what happened a week before his mother died even if logistically, at his age? He wouldn’t care nor notice. Sure, he remembers his mom’s death because that was traumatic. But random cow deaths before that? Weird show.

If Sam noticed or not the signs before Jessica died, we don’t know. John is the one who points out they happened.

After two gorgeous road shots where we see John’s truck being followed by Baby (yet another thing we lost, John’s truck. I know we needed to have the guys together all the time, but man, if Sam had inherited it, they would’ve been able to cover more terrain at times, have double the arsenal and maybe not being identified by everyone and their leviathan in season 7, but I digress), and just entering Salvation John stops, obviously spooked by something. As Dean stops behind him, they find out that Pastor Jim is dead, and John got a call from another hunter named Caleb to tell him. They assume it may be the demon they’re chasing, or maybe another demon that was looking for Pastor Jim specifically but that last theory is not very probable.

Here I have to pause to applaud Jeffrey Dean Morgan’s acting, as you can practically FEEL John’s despair at knowing an old friend of him died, and that HE was probably the cause for that death. A Winchester trait, of course, blaming themselves for everything bad that happens in their world, but unlike Sam’s early outburst, here it seems far more desperate. Of course, JDM had a lot more experience than Jared at that point, but I really wanted to make a note of it because we lost a LOT of that characterization for John, where he actually WORRIED about people and not just the hunt. Even as he decides the plan for finding out what baby the demon will take in a week, we can see him broken and confused. So much that while Sam calls him “sir” when receiving orders, Dean continues the conversation by calling him “Dad”.

John then declares that this ends now, obviously feeling responsible for what happened to his friend. A long shot from the flanderized man we’d hear about in future seasons who was infamous for letting his hunting partners die without so much as a second glance.

Also, and not to be mean to the writers, but in their endless accidentally making Sam unsympathetic, they made him say that there were too many children in the county that could be a victim and that it would take forever to check all of them. While I KNOW the intent was to make clear that they had a deadline of one week, it comes out weirdly as “I don’t want to do the footwork.” Seriously, writers should be careful with that.

Actually, let’s dissect that. Because I just thought of two ways they could’ve fixed it AND give us more info.

JOHN Now we act like every second counts. There's two hospitals and a health centre in this county. We split up, cover more ground. I want records. I want a list of every infant that's going to be six months old in the next week.

SAM Dad that could be dozens of kids. How do we know which one's the right one?

JOHN We check em all that's how. You got any better ideas?

SAM No sir.

So, first way to make Sam not look that bad: Give the line to Dean. I wouldn’t like it specially, but hey, he’s the sidekick, not the hero, and so far he has only wanted to bail on ONE hunt because he wasn’t sure it was a supernatural hunt so he’d be better standing than Sam in that regard.

Second way: Make Sam say that YES, he has a better idea. Because the brothers ALREADY faced Max, so he could say they could look for a baby that was a bit “strange”, like, with poltergeist stuff going around. John could not believe him, but at least Sam would be being proactive.

In any case, they separate as John planned and we see each of them get into the hospital records. We get a glimpse of John’s collection of fake IDs, that include one for a Morgue forensic doctor, then Sam getting a homely nurse giving him files and him taking notes, and Dean… getting flirty with a very hot nurse.

And I make a point of the “Oh, look, Dean is an irresponsible womanizer” trope because once again the writers shoot themselves in the foot by showing the opposite of what they were telling (And no, this time I can’t blame it on Jensen’s acting and refusal to look at his female co-stars without respect).

WOMAN Hi. Is there anything I can do for you?

DEAN (smiling) Oh God yes.

She smiles and looks down.

DEAN (Holding up his ID) Only I'm uh....working right now, so...

The writers here make us remember that a) Dean is AMAZINGLY charismatic, as the woman IS flattered and seems interested, and b) That he will NOT dump his work for a quickie. We don’t even get a “maybe later” that could make him look as if he was really into her. It’s just that he flirts naturally, or at least, this is what we can infer now, as so far he hasn’t had any one night stand fling. The one time we saw him have a sexual encounter in the middle of a hunt was with an ex-girlfriend.

And again I have to wonder what was Sera Gamble’s intention with those scenes as yes, this was written by the same team as Faith, another episode where Sam’s good intentions tend to have a darker side, and gave Dean some amazingly cool scenes.

We don’t know what Dean says to the woman, as we cut back to Sam, coming out of the hospital just in time to have a very convenient vision of a woman, a nursery and a fire. Thankfully, the vision also comes with the useful audio hint of a train passing by, so Sam gets out his map and starts checking where that could be, which leads him to the house in his vision.

And by this point, we know we’re in the right track and this is an important Myth Arc episode, because Sam only has multiple visions in Myth Arc episodes, and he has one the moment he steps in front of the house in said vision. The gods of convenience smile upon him as right then and there a woman pushing a pram comes by, and he manages to talk to her, all friendly like by pretending to having just moved. Then Sam learns the woman’s name is Monica, her baby is Rosie, and Rosie is just six months old, exactly to the day.

Also, that she’s a very quiet baby and that it sometimes seems as if she was reading your mind. Oh, and that Monica really is blind to suspicious men asking her about her family with a face that reads “Oh shit, this is bad”.

Now, HERE is where the whole “five year myth arc” story falls completely. I mean, we already knew it was pretty unlikely it was real, given Kirkpe’s original interviews, but the mere existence of Rosie contradicts every single future story beat. Because if SHE has powers before Azazael goes into her house, then it means that the babies he was hunting didn’t get powers because of him, just that his blood either connected them (hence Sam’s very specific visions), made said powers far more powerful (quite likely), or made them a little bit more prone to violence/prideful behavior. All of those possibilities match with the plan of “raising” a new King or Queen of Hell, that would be faithful to Azazael, but are a bit iffy on the “finding Lucifer’s vessel” thing. Especially since we later learn that the Angels were also helping, and all Hell knew that Lucifer’s vessel HAD to come from the Winchester/Campbell bloodline due to Cain and Abel being the roots of said bloodline, and later pretty much everyone knew Sam was Lucifer’s vessel so the whole targeting a ton of kids, in particular after Mary’s death, is kinda weird.

Oh, Lux, you will say, it is because he wanted to hide his true intentions! No one knew that Sam had been feed demon blood!

Except that the important parties, namely Heaven and Hell, did. Michael had Heaven convinced of his orders, so even if a rogue angel found out that they were speed running the Apocalypse, said angel could be killed. And any demon who was against getting Lucifer back on top would be smart enough to keep quiet so, why the secrecy?

And again, ok, I buy the original demon blood kids being important to “hide” Lucifer’s vessel but… Rosie? What good would it do to Azazael’s plan to have a psychic 4 year old when Lucifer rose? Was “little four year old girl” a good match against a grown up hunter? What was Azazel thinking, if that was the plan all the time?

Now, I want to make clear this doesn’t make THIS episode or the Season-myth arc bad. This original “Boy King of Hell” storyline WAS good. It had a lot of potential, made sense for Sam and since it was before the days of the eternal “What is wrong with Sam?” seasons, there was no boredom of a repeat. It also set a very good question of what made a monster a monster, which would be explored a bit more in Season 2. And it was long before we realized Dean having a myth arc was a pipe dream, so there was no issue there either. It made sense.

But the fact that the writers kind of forgot about everything I just pointed out with Rosie’s scene to try and weld this to the “Heaven vs. Hell” storyline in season 4, and then just promptly forgot because Sam’s powers were then firmly connected to Azazael’s blood so they never came up again and even worse, we never find another psychic kid that could’ve been feed blood by Azazael THIS year that John was chasing him? (Since we know there were no other survivors from Sam’s generation, and later we have a scene that proves that there were no previous generations to Sam’s), it's kind of weird. Personally, I dunno about you, but maybe a return to this storyline in season 6 would’ve been a lot better than we got. Maybe.

By the way, I am not counting the Boy King of Hell story arc as a dropped plot for Sam yet, as we’re going to keep with this at least until season 3. Yes, now we know it didn’t go anywhere, but at the time, and for these episodes in particular, it was THE myth arc of Supernatural. So it can’t be counted as dropped plot yet.

In any case, Sam goes and tells John and Dean about his vision and… oh, boy do we have to move John’s reaction to Emotional Violence.

It’s not good.

But before he can do more damage to Dean’s psyche, Sam gets a call from our favorite demon, Meg. Even if he doesn’t recognize her voice immediately which is weird because a) he did throw her off a window and one would think that makes a girl memorable, and b) it’s not as he knows that many girls who would call him, despite Dean’s best efforts to get him a new girl.

Meg dismisses Sam and asks for John. She makes clear that she is not playing, that she knows he has the Colt and that he will kill every single person who has ever helped John unless he gives it to her that same day at midnight. And to the brothers’ surprise, John accepts those terms (Unfortunately not before we loss Caleb too. I have a lot less interest in Caleb as a character given that he has exactly half a line in the whole show, but it’s still it’s sad to see a guy so defiant even in the face of death go so soon).

Meg also points out that John having the Colt is a “declaration of war” which is interesting as it sort of implies that if he hadn’t gotten it, then the demons would leave him and the brothers alone. And I find that incredibly funny since… no they won’t. And Azazael would’ve been ok if Sam kept the gun anyway, given why they really wanted and once again I am putting holes on the idea that this was planned from the start, aren’t I?

In any case, John declares that Meg is a demon “or is possessed by one” which… ok? First and only time we get the possibility of a demon not using a meat suit. I don’t think this is a mistake, because after all, this is back before the guys faced demons in a normal basis so they could believe that they had their own bodies besides the ones they possessed (And, more importantly, before there was a retcon that made the brothers face and know about demons since pretty much ever). To be completely fair, as much as I love Jimmy and the whole Lucifer arc once it started to make sense… I would’ve been ok if vessels weren’t needed. It added a lot of complications and ended up making the brothers actual serial killers.

Ahem.

After that little gem of wisdom that will be ignored forever, John declares that he will be taking the gun to Meg to avoid more killing and we get another questionable line for Sam. And I am curious as to how to tally it as it’s the opposite of him wanting to leave the hunt, but it’s not that nice either:

DEAN What do we do?

JOHN I'm going to Lincoln. DEAN What? JOHN It doesn't look lilke we have a choice. If I don't go, a lot of people die, our friends die.

SAM Dad, the demon is coming tonight. For Monica and her family. That gun is all we got, you can't just hand it over.

I mean, yes, it is true that the demon is coming for Monica (Well, actually, he’s coming for Rosie, the baby, but I will let that slip pass. Sam is not interested in married ladies), and that with the gun they can kill the demon but it’s not all they’ve got. By this time, Sam has already had his big hero moment when he exorcised a plane in free fall so they could do that, then chase the demon again and then kill it.

But what is jarring is how he hears “a lot of people die, OUR FRIENDS die” and he goes “yeah, whatever, we have a mission to fulfill”.

Which is precisely what later episodes will tell us John used to do, and was the reason why John was not exactly liked by the general hunter population. And at the same time, it’s an eerie reminder of Wendigo, where Sam is willing to let innocents die (his family friends, in this particular case, just as he heard Caleb choke on his own blood) in order to get his way (revenge on the demon that killed Jess. NOT revenge on the demon that killed his mom, since at this point, Sam is still on the “I never knew that woman” train of thought).

Sure, his mind is in the hunt, and that’s commendable because yes, in the long run, killing Azazael would save more innocents (And probably stop the Apocalypse, not that Sam or the writers at that time know it), but it is still strange to see our nominal hero simply not care for his friends’ lives. I mean, at this point WE don’t know about Bobby, so the closest to a parental figure that is not John that Sam had was Pastor Jim and he just DIED.

Worst part is, this could be solved really easy: Just have DEAN be the one who voices the complaint, and have “empathic” Sam mumble that there has to be a way to save everyone (Which, of course, John will mention in a second). It would make Dean look bad, sure, but we’ve been told once and again that Dean never, EVER goes against John plans. Which… not true, ut we will talk about that later. The scene continues, and John declares that he will go to Meg alone, with a fake Colt and while Dean thinks that that won’t work, Sam has a different complaint:

DEAN Yeah but for how long? What happens when she figures it out?

JOHN I just...I just need to buy a few hours, that's all.

SAM You mean for Dean and me. You want us to stay here, and kill this demon by ourselves?

JOHN No Sam. I want to stop losing people we love. I want you to go to school, I want Dean to have a home. I want....I want Mary alive. It's just....I just want this to be over.

And oh, boy. Do this four lines again hold so much weight.

First, once again, Dean seems to be worried for John (logically, he’s their dad), while Sam is making the weirdest line in the universe sort of work because he’s complaining that John is trusting them to kill the demon, something HE wants to do and not four seconds ago was saying they had to do, as if it was John shifting HIS job to Sam. Seriously, I don’t want to think the worst of Sam but when you take out Jared’s acting, the text doesn’t do the younger Winchester’s any favors.

And finally… John’s lines that encompass pretty much Dean’s philosophy in the following seasons. “I want to stop losing people we love” is pretty telling, but what comes next? He actually WANTS Sam to go back to college and not worry about the Supernatural. He actively agrees that Dean doesn’t have a home, and WANTS Dean to have one. It’s as close as love as we’ll see from John to Dean in Season 1, and it hurts. It hurts because we can tell he knows he won’t be there to see it… and now, in hindsight with the finale having aired, we also know Dean didn’t get that. (And to be fair, this is the John who did deserve Heaven. Not the flanderized version we’d get in the future)

Although, ironically, Mary got to be alive again, so… One out of three?

(No, seriously, it’s obvious the writers didn’t even remember this speech when Season 12 hit, much less Season 15)

Ahem.

Dean is sent to get a fake Colt, while Sam and John wait for him. If they talked about anything, we don’t know, but when they exchange guns, Dean voices what we all know is true:

DEAN You know this is a trap don't you. That's why Meg wants you to come alone?

JOHN I can handle her. I got a whole arsenal loaded. Holy water, Mandaic, amulets...

DEAN Dad... JOHN What? DEAN Promise me something. JOHN What's that. DEAN This thing goes south just...get the hell out. Don't get yourself killed all right, you're no good to us dead. JOHN Same goes for you. (There is a long pause) All right listen to me. They made the bullets special for this colt. There's only four of them left. Without them this gun is useless. You make every shot count.

SAM Yes sir.

JOHN Been waiting a long time for this fight. Now it's here I'm not gonna be in it. It's up to you boys now. It's your fight, you finish this. You finish what I started. Understand?

Again, I wish they remembered all they had to get rid of demons before, you know, killing everyone willy-nilly. I mean, I don’t even think I know what Mandalac IS but hey, John says it works, it works. And once more, Dean gets a line that makes clear he is the empathic, loving brother, when it wouldn’t have hurt Sam to say it. In fact, it would make clear that no matter what, he doesn’t hate John. But nope, Sam only acts like the soldier we’re TOLD Dean is, while Dean makes clear that for him, family is more important than revenge (And boy will that come to bite him in the ass later, not in the series, but in this same episode).

Also, I have to admit. When I started this rewatch, John’s final line was just a good moment for John to start letting go of his anger. Now? After that horrid finale? It hurts so, so much. But it hurts more because I KNOW that there’s no way it was intentional. Obviously, Kirkpe didn’t know the series would last 15 years, and I highly doubt Dabb remembered this scene when writing 15x20. But even so, it ends up being Dean’s epitaph. OUCH.

In any case, the Winchester separate again, and we go into act three. Get ready for the feels.

John Winchester hunting alone is a thing of beauty. Seeing him scope the place, check the water tank and immediately think of a plan? Makes me wish Jeffrey Dean Morgan had stayed longer on the show. Sure, John became an asshole, but in this episode he’s still not that bad, we still have no episodes that make clear he didn’t care for Dean, and wasn’t textually abusive. And I am willing to bet that if JDM had stayed, John would’ve evolved more to be a Bobby-like character. But well, What ifs is not why you came to this meta for.

As John is hunting, the brothers are staking out the house were they know Azazael will attack. And while they talk and decide that they have no way to get the family out (In a nice callback to how none of their excuses ever work) we get to this little gem of an exchange:

SAM I wonder how Dad's doing.

DEAN I'd feel a lot better if we were there backing him up.

SAM I'd feel a lot better if he were here backing us up.

Where once again we see where the brother’s priorities lie, and I wonder why the hell the writers ever thought they were writing Sam as an empathic character.

Because yes, Dean is wishing he could be out there helping his Dad, proving that for him, it has always been about the family. Not the hunting, but the protecting. But Sam doesn’t want to protect John. He wants John protecting Them. And helping them in the revenge hunt, not trying to save others.

Sure, we know the brothers are there to save an innocent mother, but John is also saving a ton of hunters and people who, in the past, were nice and open to the family. And it would’ve been so much easier to make Sam look better if he instead had said “I’d feel a lot better if we hadn’t had to separate” or something like that, that proved he saw BOTH missions were important.

Seriously, I do wonder why the writers made these choices, and I wish someone had asked this at cons.

We go back to John, who, really, Is an amazing hunter even if he is a horrible father. Also, I wonder if he got ordained at a web church, in order to be able to sanctify water. That would be such a John Winchester thing to do, and I do wonder why the boys never did it too. ANYWAY, he hands the gun to Meg, and to her ally that came so that we could have a scene to prove the Colt is fake as the ally shoots Meg.

As John says, Meg was lucky the gun was fake. And once again, I do wonder what the plan was if it WAS the Colt. I mean, Meg was Azazael’s second in command. Why would nameless demon risk killing her? Or did he kinow the gun was fake?

In any case, this makes the moment where we can be 100% sure that Meg’s meat suit 1.0 was dead. I mean, she could’ve survived the fall in Shadow, but a bullet to the chest? No way.

We go back to the brothers, and Sam breaks every single law of a procedural show by giving this great speech about how thankful he is to Dean for everything, and how he needs to say that “in case” something happened.

Dean is definitely not impressed and reminds him that the only one dying today is Azazael.

As we see John temporarily escape from Meg and her muscle boy, we go back to the brothers who see the demon omens start up so they get ready for the final fight.

The brothers manage to save Monica and her baby, despite the very understandable interference from Hubbard, the husband (I mean, you would not react nicely to two strangers intruding in your house and yelling to your wife to not go into the nursery room), however, before Sam can shoot Azazel, he disappears into smoke (A really interesting question here is, WHY did Sam wait to shoot and then wasted a bullet, but I digress).

Going completely against M.O, Azazael makes the CRIB burst into flames, but fortunately Dean has already gotten Rosie out of it so the brothers escape the flaming house. While Monica cries her thanks, Sam notices that Azazael is still inside, and tries to go after him, but Dean stops him because he is not going to lose his brother to the fire. By the way, I am not counting “Dean stopping Sam from going into a burning building” as “Dean forcing Sam to do something” since, uh, he was saving Sam’s life and it’s something anyone in Dean’s place would’ve done.

At the same time, we see John getting captured by Meg and her muscle boy because he didn’t think about getting a third escape route (But honestly? That was pretty much a plot necessity. John was HEAVILY prepared for that fight)

Back in the hotel, Dean is worried that John is not answering his calls, while Sam is furious that Dean didn’t let him kill himself by running into a burning house. They have a nasty fight that mirrors the one they had back in the pilot, but since it IS a fight between the brothers, you know the drill. We’re examining it under Violence.

Once Sam calms down, he tells Dean to try calling John again. Unfortunately, it’s Meg who answers and she tells Dean that they’re never seeing their dad again.

And we get the first “To be continued” for the series (Which to be honest, despite all the little continuity mistakes I mentioned here? Is still pretty epic)

Violence

Well, we had to run out of episodes where the brothers don’t fight each other at some point, didn’t we?

This fight, over Sam wanting to kill himself in his search for revenge, is a very neat parallel to the fight they had back in the Pilot, over Sam NOT wanting to even involve himself in the family’s search for revenge. Which I know it’s supposed to be ironic and a show of character growth since now Dean is the one saying that revenge is not worth their lives but… it falls a little bit flat because the reason why Sam is so gung-ho in killing Azazael is, once again, a very selfish one and the way in he expresses it makes it quite clear. (Again, I do wonder if the writers stopped to think about the implications of Sam only getting really into hunting when it was about him or his losses?)

But let’s start at the beginning:

SAM If you had just let me go in there, I coulda ended all this.

DEAN Sam, the only thing you would have ended was your life.

SAM You don't know that.

DEAN So what, you're just willing to sacrifice yourself, is that it?

SAM Yeah. Yeah you're damn right I am.

DEAN Well that's not going to happen, not as long as I'm around.

This right here? Is a nice summary of the relationship of the brothers for the whole series. Sam wants to do something stupid, like, say, running into a burning building, Dean is there to stop him before he hurts himself.

Also, let’s make clear the use of first person by Sam. It’s not “We coulda ended this”, as in the family ending the hunt, but “I coulda ended this”. Again, at this point, not something that is a problem, but considering hindsight, we can see how the writers are completely invested in SAM as a sole main character, and write him as such, while Dean is more of the sidekick.

In any case, the argument continues, still not escalating to violence.

SAM What the hell are you talking about Dean, we've been searching for this demon our whole lives. It's the only thing we've ever cared about.

DEAN Sam I wanna waste it. I do. Okay? But it's not worth dying over.

SAM What?

DEAN I mean it. If hunting this demon means getting yourself killed then I hope we never find the damn thing.

Important thing how Sam apparently forgot he left for four (two) years and wanted out of the family business, now that he is angry and into the revenge thing. It’s not “You’ve been searching for this demon your whole life”, which would’ve been correct AND a logical counterargument against Dean. Before this episode, Sam was supposedly the brother who understood that revenge was a way of living, while Dean is the one who was Daddy’s little soldier. But here, when it actually would matter to the narrative, it is as if Sam’s wishes for a normal life are completely forgotten and it’s Dean the one who understands that there’s more to living than revenge (Which, btw, is consistent through the season despite everyone claiming that Dean needs Sam to keep hunting. All season, Dean has been giving Sam outs, telling him it’s ok to quit)

And of course, Dean here proves that Sam is more important to him than revenge for his mother, as he is willing to never get to kill the demon as long as his family, his brother in particular, survives.

Poor Dean.

SAM That thing killed Jess. That thing killed Mom.

DEAN You said yourself once, that no matter what we do, they're gone, and they're never coming back.

SAM Don't you say that, not you! Not after all this don't you say that.

DEAN Sam look. The three of us...that's all we have...and it's all I have. Sometimes I feel like I'm barely holding it together man...and without you or Dad....

Unfortunately, script doesn’t quiet convey the scene as there’s a LONG pause between “That thing killed Jess” and “That thing killed Mom”. Enough so that we can believe that Sam is using that second phrase not because he cares (in the Pilot he made clear he didn’t), but to make Dean get on board with the whole “I can kill myself if it means getting revenge” plan. In other words, once again, Sam is weaponizing Mary against Dean, and that is a really nasty habit the younger Winchester never quite shakes out of. Instead, Dean shows how he LISTENED to Sam back in the Pilot and repeats Sam’s words to him on the bridge.

Which is when Sam loses it and pushes Dean against a wall, Dean not defending himself at all, and yells that Dean has no right to say what Sam told Dean the very first hunt they had together after years of separation.

And of course, once Dean mentions their father, Sam starts calming down. NOT when Dean says that he’s barely holding it together, or that he only has them. Just when he mentions their father who is, in Sam’s mind, the one who can help him get revenge.

The fight ends, but Sam never once apologizes for what he said to Dean, nor for the fight. Which, by the way, contradicts his claim that Dean “always has his back”.

Emotional Violence

Whenever we have John on an episode, we’re going to have to talk about emotional violence and I kind of hate that because on one hand, I get how John could’ve been a very tragic figure that loved his sons but still wanted to avenge his wife, and not being the abusive bastard we know and don’t love that much.

When Sam and Dean explain about Sam’s visions, and how they started as nightmares but have grown in intensity, his reaction is quite subdued, but clear. He is not happy, but the problem isn’t the visions –for a man obsessed with the supernatural, his outward reaction to his younger son being a psychic is quite calm- but that they didn’t inform him of what was going on:

JOHN All right. When were you going to tell me about this?

DEAN We didn't know what it meant.

JOHN All right, something like this starts happening to your brother, you pick up the phone and you call me.

DEAN dumps the coffee jug and cup back on the counter and strides toward JOHN.

DEAN Call you? Are you kidding me? Dad I called you from Lawrence all right? Sam called you when I was dying. I mean, getting you on the phone? I got a better chance of winning the lottery.

JOHN You're right. Although I'm not too crazy about this new tone of yours, you're right. I'm sorry.

And let’s be clear, John’s anger is not directed at Sam, it’s directed at Dean. “Something like this starts happening to your brother” is not “Something like this starts happening to either of you”. Which is also a show of how good an actor JOHN is in universe because WE know that he knew. Missouri TOLD him point blank that Sam was powerful and that he could have known that John was around during the Home episode. But here, he acts as if this was news to him when he could ALSO have told them what to expect if that happened. (Mind you, I am assuming that Sera Gamble knew or remembered about Home’s script when writing this and didn’t just forget or was unaware that John was supposed to know)

Now, all season, Sam has been complaining and yelling about how John doesn’t answer their calls, doesn’t seem to care what’s going on with them. So it’d be logical and in character for Sam to say something here. But instead is DEAN, Dad’s little soldier, the one we’ve SEEN obeying John without question finally have enough and talk back to his father with some truths. And it’s VERY interesting that his first complain is not that John didn’t care that Dean almost died, but that he didn’t reply when Dean called from Lawrence. One could almost infer that Dean expected John not to care if Dean died, but was honestly hurt that he didn’t care about a case that could’ve involved MARY.

John, surprisingly, sort of agrees. He does say “I’m sorry”, which makes him the Winchester who is quicker to say those words… but he still manages to make a threat against Dean “I am not too crazy about this NEW tone of yours”.

Making it clear that before? Dean never talked back. And John doesn’t like it when his soldiers talk back.

It makes it hard to believe John ever thought of Dean as his son and makes it very clear why Dean never understood Sam’s confidence that Dean was the favored one.

Speeches and Apologies

I considered not including this particular speech, but then I remembered that Supernatural is ALSO famous for their big emotional speeches, and this is Sam’s first, and also, Dean’s first time listening to someone he cares about give him the “I am saying goodbye because I am going kamikaze” speech and after all the drama in season 15, I guess it’s necessary to do some dissection.

It is important that despite all the things that Sam has done to Dean, the words “I’m sorry” are never uttered here.

SAM Dean...ah...I wanna thank you. DEAN For what? SAM For everything. You've always had my back you know? Even when I couldn't count on anyone I could always count on you. And ah...I don't know I just wanted to let you know, Just in case DEAN Whoa whoa whoa, are you kidding me? SAM What? DEAN Don't say just in case something happens to you. I don't wanna hear that freaking speech man. Nobody's dying tonight. Not us, not that family, nobody. Except that demon. That evil son of a bitch ain't getting any older than tonight, you understand me?

This is not a bad “freaking speech”. I understand why Dean didn’t want to hear it, because it is like jinxing the mission (And, let’s be honest, it did), but it’s not a bad speech.

Except that, reading it again, it lacks one important part. Sure, Sam thanks Dean for always being there (Forgetting that, at least three times this season alone, he has accused Dean of not having his back and being unreliable. Which will ALSO be a constant theme in the series’s long run), but he never mentions the times HE did things that would be hard to back up. Which, again, I am not counting as a bad thing against him in this precise moment in time, since he is young, in his roaring roadtrip of revenge, and we’ve only know the brothers for a year, but it is the beginning of a series’ long crutch to make us forgive all of Sam’s sins without him actually doing the work to be forgiven.

On the other hand, it all goes to waste a bit later when Sam starts hitting Dean for the horrible sin of not letting him run into a burning building and kill himself so… it’s not really a “thank you for having my back” speech but a “You better remember, you never fight me and my choices are the best” speech in hindsight. Which… not good on Sam, no.

Double narrative standards

This episode is kind of balanced, except for that little moment where we’re supposed to think Dean is wrong for telling Sam that revenge is not worth their lives. So there’s not much to write in this particular segment.

Final Tally

Ok, back in the saddle. And after all that, I decided not to tally Sam’s little slip about not caring if their loved ones die as long as he gets to kill Azazael. Let me know if you disagree.

The count is still not good on Sam’s side, but as always, you are free to disagree with me, and dm me if you think I missed a tally or I should change one. If your argument is solid and canon based, I will listen to it and may change the numbers.

Numbers (or the TL;DR summary)

(Episode/Total so far)

Times Dean has lied to Sam or to a loved one: 0 / 0

Times Sam has lied to Dean or to a loved one: 0 / 3

Times Dean has been caught in a lie: 0 / 0

Times Sam has been caught in a lie: 0 / 1

Times Dean has hit Sam in anger: 0 / 1

Times Sam has hit Dean in anger: 1 / 4

Times Dean's lies or secrets have caused someone's death: 0 / 0

Times Sam's lies or secrets have caused someone's death: 0 / 1

Times Dean has abandoned (Or wanted to abandon) a hunt in the middle for his own needs: 0 / 0

Times Sam has abandoned (Or wanted to abandon) a hunt in the middle for his own needs: 0 / 7

Times Dean forced Sam to do something: 0 / 0

Times Sam forced Dean to do something: 0 / 7

Secrets kept by Dean: 0 / 1

Secrets kept by Sam: 0 / 2

Times Dean has blamed Sam for something: 0 / 0

Times Sam has blamed Dean for something: 1 / 4

Times Dean has apologized with words to Sam: 0 / 3

Times Sam has apologized with words to Dean: 0 / 2

Times Dean has respected Sam's boundaries and/or rules: 0 / 7

Times Sam has respected Dean's boundaries and/or rules: 0 / 0

Times Dean hasn't respected Sam's boundaries and/or rules: 0 / 0

Times Sam hasn't respected Dean's boundaries and / or rules: 0 / 13

Times Dean has made fun of something Sam does or has: 0 / 6

Times Sam has made fun of something Dean does or has: 0 / 31

Times we focus on Dean's needs: 0 / 1

Times we focus on Sam's needs: 1 / 6

Arc episodes dedicated to Sam: 1 / 7

Filler episodes dedicated to Sam: 0 / 6

Arc episodes dedicated to Dean: 0 / 0

Filler episodes dedicated to Dean: 0 / 4

Arc episodes dedicated to both brothers (or to none): 0 / 2

Filler episodes dedicated to both brothers (or to none): 0 / 2

Dean's Dropped Plotlines: 0 / 1

Sam's Dropped Plotlines: 0 / 2

#Supernatural rewatch project #Salvation #Dean Winchester #Sam Winchester #not very Sam positive #John Winchester #Season 1 #Season 1 episode 20 #SPN #Supernatural meta

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serenedash · 3 years ago

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I started rambling about my experience with kh and then it turned into khux and then it just turned into me rambling about Ryou and my art journey????? enjoy I guess,

it’s very long but there’s art in there :)

It’s funny to think about my kh journey as a whole tbh, I grew up watching my mom play video games, which included kh1 and 2. I wasn’t allowed to play the playstation2 we owned BUT I did have a gameboy so the first game I played was CoM (after my mom finished it ofc,) so I guess you could say I’ve always been passionate about kh “””side games””” lmao but I did fall off of kh very quickly bc again, I wasn’t allowed to play our PS2 and also I Am A Terrible Gamer I’ve Never Finished CoM I’m sorry you all had to find out like this, but then 358/2 came out when I was in middle school and!!! I didn’t care and I didn’t play idk why lol

Anyway, fast forward to high school I’m like 15 and my older sister, who HAS been keeping up with kh, has a wallpaper on her phone of roxas and ventus. And bc I haven’t kept up I say “nice roxas wallpaper” and she says “thanks but it’s roxas and ventus” and I proceeded to get so mad that I was determined to prove to her that her wallpaper was just roxas twice and then I fell down the BBS rabbit hole and suddenly I was reading about vanitas and then I’m reading the fan translations of the BBS novel and I’m crying??? I am sobbing???? and that’s how I actually got into kh for real lol we are vanitas stans before we are people,

It’s so funny how I thought I was some kh super fan, knowing all this stuff that I spent so long reading and rewatching cutscene movies, but I never once, SOMEHOW NEVER ever came across khx. It’s so absurd and bizarre I seriously have no idea how I never once encountered khx prior to khux. I suppose that has to do with the fact I wasn’t involved in the fandom? In early high school I had stepped away from fandoms as a whole and I didn’t have any interest in really posting content or interacting with fans anymore bc of how burnt out I was from a previous fandom,

but khux released! and I was so hype and excited for it! on launch day I was a senior in high school, I had ran around to every “nerd” and weeb I could find in school to ask them to join my party and fun fact about me is I have crippling social anxiety I literally refuse to start conversations irl so holy shit I was OUT HERE doing the MOST

My player just originally had my name (Matt) but everyone in my party had fun names so Ryou was born! High school was one big yugioh phase for me and ryou bakura is one of my favorite characters ever so it was just the logical name choice lol I quickly started creating Ryou, the character, as well. I was also leaving my homestuck phase and that + vanitas obsession made This character design (art circa 2016)

If y’all are familiar with my kh oc’s you might notice that keyblade now belongs to my kid Monty LOL

Anyway that got scrapped quickly for the chip and dale outfit (which is where Ryou’s trademark goggles are from <3) Goggles have been a staple of my character designs for a LONG TIME so like, it had to be done, (that’s a separate ramble about a separate oc tho)

OG Ryou was an interesting guy; he was a young party leader with this overwhelming responsibility on his shoulders bc of his status as a party leader. In his original story, he also struggled heavily with darkness, much like Terra but for Ryou it was more that the darkness was controlling him and not like a source of power like it was for Terra

A big part of early Ryou I kept, however, was the crushing awareness of loss. One of my party members (the strongest one at the time,) had left without saying a word and I was very confused and hurt. This was around the time the ephemera plot was happening so I decided to incorporate it into Ryou’s story; having him experience losing a friend to darkness since it’s so normal for wielders in Daybreak Town to just disappear, and this would unintentionally become a theme for both me and Ryou as khux friends would just randomly disappear.

I was desperate for khux at this point and I decided to watch the fan translations for khx and GOD, god, was I obsessed. I couldn’t stop thinking about the foretellers. And I’m not going off about that here bc I already did that, but I actually started entering fandom again! I did it slowly, I started on tumblr before this blog was made altho it was me sending anons to the few khux related blogs I could have lol a friend convinced me to get twitter where I got involved with the ffxv fandom, which led me to the kh fandom and eventually the khux fandom there which is what REALLY got me going on khux.

I joined discord servers, most of the servers I’m in are khux related, and from there I joined the khux oc rp (shout out to anyone there who might be reading this lol here’s some art from the beginning of the rp,)

It’s SO FUNNY how the RP influenced me so heavily. I hadn’t RP’d in YEARS, I used to have a strict no oc rp policy, but here I was? And the funny part is, I had barely developed Ryou. I had scrapped his original story and all I had was POST WAR Ryou so I literally had to reverse write him; I had only ever written him as a depressed, guilt ridden adult, but it was a fucking blast and I have such fond memories of this rp when it was active,

But anyway, this encouraged me to get more serious about art! I started drawing, writing, cosplaying, and roleplaying when I hadn’t done any of that stuff in a very long time. The first time I ever drew a background was for a deviant art khux competition actually LOL

also! I always think extremely fondly of the drawing I did of Aced in the keyblade war. It was also one of the first backgrounds I ever drew and it felt like my real starting point in the khux fandom. It got a ton of notes on here and someone wrote a tiny fic in a reblog which just made me SO HAPPY like it really felt like people were noticing me :) I was going to draw a matching Ira but!! I just never did!! One day tho, it’s on my art bucket list to redraw this along with Ira,

Aside from my personal growth, khux was great for my social life ngl, I made SO MANY friends online and got to meet a ton of people irl over the years! It’s crazy to think about all the people I now know and talk to? It honestly makes me really emotional. I’ll never forget taking the train into NYC and meeting up with discord friends. Going to conventions and talking with people about the latest khux update? Absolutely insane and those were some GOOD TIMES, if I thanked every khux friend or even just person who made an impact on me then we’d be here for a LONG TIME,

Fun fact, for my Lauriam cosplay all I needed to buy was the wig I just owned his outfit LOL also? Probably retiring that cosplay ngl people treated me like absolute garbage when I wore him and it led to a lot of confidence issues for awhile ngl. That’s probably one of the only memorable negative experiences I have with khux; it was great when khux people recognized me but for kh fans that weren’t in khux? They were FUCKING MEAN??? fuck kh fandom at large, I only care about khux fandom,

This leads me to another huge part of my experience in khux fandom: THEORIES!! I used to write SO MANY and oh my god my brain was so full all the time. It was a huge appeal for me in the fandom; I had been previously writing theory posts in the RWBY fandom and it just migrated over to khux for me lol I had done a ton of theorizing around Lauriam tbh, it was really the only reason I liked his character at all bc initially I did not care about the dandelions, anyone who wasn’t Skuld I was like “please leave Now thanks”

A funny part of khux fandom I never intended to be apart of is the MEMES, I really only started doing memes as stress relief bc college had me so busy all I had time/energy for was these quick little shit post drawings.

The first meme I made, file name “invi despair” LOL we need to get her a girlfriend smh anyway, I think in my senior year of college I did a bunch of rapid fire memes all in one month bc the stress of finals was getting so bad afdgfhdgf as far as I know my impact on this fandom will be my memes bc all I do now is enter a kh/khux server and introduce myself and I go “yeah I draw art. here’s a meme” and everyone goes OH YOU, honestly I am nothing if not a clown

I’ve talked so much idk where I’m going with this. Khux is just a good game even if the gameplay actually kind of really sucks yknow lol but it was the first game I played where I like, REALLY got into the meta and the mechanics. I used to read so much on the mechanics and watch youtube videos on which medals were worth pulling for. I was never a whale or a top player exactly, but I could rank well if I tried lol I’ve made it to the top 100 for solo rankings, my party has made it to top 10, and in pvp I’ve made top 300. I’m not the highest level in my party but FUCK do I know how to manipulate this game LOL

And with all that hard work, the strategies, the theorizing, the content I’ve made-- it’s been my life for 5 years. I’ve logged into khux almost every single day. At the end, I have logged 1820 days in khux out of 1910 days. Kinda crazy. Crazier I’ve never spent money on khux either lol the only “money” gone into it was one time my mom gave me a google play store gift card and I used it on my birthday for a VIP xemnas medal which eventually made it to regular pulls anyway but it was nice and a little treat :)

I’m not a gacha fan, I don’t care for it, so I don’t think I’ll be touching another gacha again. But for kh? This was pretty fucking awesome, even if it sucked a lot sometimes LOL It was worth it for the people I’ve met most of all I think. I would honestly be a completely different person without khux and that’s REALLY insane to think about.

#the khux hyperfixation is REAL #but yall knew this about me #there's so much more I could say but it's 2am and this is long enough already #im rambling

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mytastessuck · 4 years ago

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Gorillaz: Plastic Beach

mAh, nostalgia. This album was my high school years. I got a digital copy for my birthday from my mom and became obsessed with this album well into college. The dominance of electronica, the use of people with great voices, the expansion of the lore, Lou Reed...this album was all of music when I got it. It's my favorite Gorillaz album and it looks like it's gonna stay that way for a while. But how is it on a not even approaching semi-objective level? Let's find out.

1. Orchestral Intro

You can probably guess it by my awful taste but I'm not really into orchestra. This opening though, with the sound of waves and the mourning instruments, really tipped me off that I was in for something different. This album wasn't going to start off with something chill or even a zombie movie clip. No, at this point, Gorillaz were officially done fucking around.

10/10

2. Welcome to the World of the Plastic Beach

Then we get the brass leading us into a good beat and then HOLY SHIT, SNOOP DOGG?! He leads us in like a bandleader while a chorus of women back him up Just Like That while he goes with his usual flow. He adds the needed touch of instant cool to an album that's practically frozen with the artists already on it and with this song, it feels like you're walking past the gate into Disneyland.

9/10

3. White Flag

Some nice Arabian sounding instruments on this one. Pretty cool for Gorillaz to keep engaging in world music. Anyway, this was a really cool instrumental but it's time to move on to the other son---

Huh?

Suddenly, we get beeps and mixes backing up Bashy and Kano as they kick so much ass talking about pacifism for the sake of survival. This song kicks an undisputed amount of ass and it barely even tries.

9/10

4. Rhinestone Eyes

What I like about this song is that I keep finding new things to like about it as the years go back. First, I liked the weirdly-threatening nature of the song along with the woman moaning in time with the verses. Then I liked the video (even though it was insanely shady of EMI to release that without Damon's and Jamie's permission and it ended up being the thing that led to Phase 3's premature ending and Gorillaz going on hiatus). Then I liked the continuation of the moaning that I first noticed in live performances then finally heard in the song itself. This song is like Rolexes falling from the sky.

10/10

5. Stylo

Ah, the first single from the album. I remember telling my dad about this when I first saw the video for it. I was about to write off Gorillaz as a relic of my past before I saw Murdoc and 2D get run off the road by Bruce Willis. This song has an awesome bridge by Yasiin Bey, nice crooning by Damon Albarn and incredible back-up by Bobby Womack, who manages to lift the entire song over his head using just his voice. Damn, wish he had another song that put his voice on full display. Maybe later in the album...

10/10

6. Superfast Jellyfish

Yeah, De La Soul is back! And they're singing about TV dinners! Seriously, these guys can make guessing crossword actually fun instead of a dredging experience and have Shiny Toy Guns frontman Chad Petree singing about radioactive seas brings the whole thing home. It makes you want to really go out and eat a random jellyfish but don't do that. It'll hurt.

11/10

7. Empire Ants

Okay, before I give this song its totally fair score, it should be noted this is my third favorite song of all time. I love Damon's reassuring lyrics in the beginning but the switch in the middle to a more upbeat electronic pop tune pushes this song past perfect.

Then there's Little Dragon...

This song introduced to me to Yukimi Nagano's voice and wow...I didn't think humans could sound like that, let alone an Asian woman singing soul. If you think the instruments are carrying her here, obviously there are clearly no other songs on the album that showcase her talents so I have to recommend After The Rain, Twice and Constant Surprises by Little Dragon. Seriously, this woman's voice will water your fucking crops.

500/10

8. Glitter Freeze

Where is north from here? Don't ask me, I'm not a compass. Anyway, this song has Mark E. Smith from The Fall and they use him to his fullest extent...by which I mean letting him make an absolutely evil fucking laugh somewhere near the end. The instrumentation makes it feel like you're in a storm on a shaky ship and you're definitely going to feel like you need some pills after you're finished. This stuff will put hair on your chest.

11/10

9. Some Kind of Nature

This song introduced me to Lou Reed and I'm grateful to it for that. Lou was a shitty dude but damn his voice really made things better than they should have been. Fuck, I was one of the eight defenders of Lulu for this reason. But Damon doesn't sit with his thumbs up his ass on this song. He holds his own and makes the chorus sound legitimately dreamlike. All we are is stars, indeed.

100/10

10. On Melancholy Hill

This song is awesome to chill to...unless you're escaping a cruise ship while being gunned down by fighter jets. But other than that particular example, I recommend this song for anyone trying to relax while thinking of someone special. But be careful with the last note of this song. That gong can be a real eye opener.

9/10

11. Broken

Bummer of a song but if there's one song you absolutely NEED to learn on melodica, it's this one. Aren't we all broken? Well I am. And this song speaks to me.

10/10

12. Sweepstakes

Yasiin's back and there's gonna be trouble. He plays a carny in this track and you know that no matter how many times you listen to this song, you'll always gonna fall for his schemes. He's gone on to say that this is one of his finest achievements as a MC and I can see why.

10/10

13. Plastic Beach

Holy shit, they got the 50 Ways To Leave Your Lover guy on this track. Makes since because this, outside of Empire Ants, is my favorite song on the album. The harmony, the little imp they got for the bridge, the triangle...everything makes this song better than it has any right to be on an already awesome album. Damn, plastico indeed.

200/10

14. To Binge

Shock of all shocks, Yukimi's back! And it's a duet with Damon! And it's a song about a relationship torn apart by addiction! It's not my birthday so it must be Christmas. These two manage to drown the listen in waves of audio goodness that leaves them feeling like they spent 3 minutes and 56 seconds standing under a waterfall.

20/10

15. Cloud of Unknowing

Okay, I cried to this song. And now, with Bobby Womack's passing, I cry even harder. This song should be an anime ending with how solemn it is but you need to listen to the end to hear, "It may bring sunshine on its wings." Also, Damon covered this song live after Womack's passing. I suggest you look it up because it is tear-ripping.

50/10

16. Pirate Jet

Eh. Pretty average song compared to the others on the album but I appreciate the message. Sweet Lord, people. Turn off your shit when you're not using it. We only got one planet and I don't trust Elon Musk.

8/10

Album Score: 60.1/10

Whoo! No biases! Anyway, next week is The Fall, otherwise known as the album Albarn did on his Ipad. Otherotherwise known as the album a significant portion of the fandom has a hate-on for. Does it deserve the hate? We'll find out!

#gorillaz #plastic beach #music #review

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jayshq · 5 years ago

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So, if you look at my followers I actually have 1,183, but that’s because this hasn’t always been Poe. I started this blog way back on Nov. 8, 2014 as Dean Winchester. It has gone through AT LEAST ten characters since then. So, a lot of these followers are dead accounts or abandoned accounts. However, when I started up Poe on here I made note that I had 1,083 followers. So, this is for the 100 of you that came here for my baby.

So, let’s get the follow forever out of the way. Let me start off by saying I’m going to forget people, I’m human. Also, I don't do very big follow forevers whenever I do them because I firmly believe in only having people who have had a very strong impact on me or Poe should be present on the list. That said, if you’re not on this list you are still very loved.

special mention of @bondforce for making this happen, thanks for being my 100th follower, lol.

REYS:

@dawnsabered : so, despite us not having any threads you’re first on this list because you re-sparked my love of the sequels and made me want to hop into this fandom again. Rping with you on Steve made me just adore the fandom more and more and made me want to bring back Poe. I’m eternally grateful to you for that. I have found such an amazing and welcoming home in this community and I wouldn’t have it without you, I love you loads, thanks a bunch.

@jedirisen : okay, so we met pretty early in and thank god we did. i adore your Rey, but more than anything you’ve been such an incredible friend. You’re always down to plot and create and just talk. You put up with my constant recommendations and are just one of the sweetest humans I’ve ever met. I’m super pumped that we found each other and I hope we have many great years of friendship ahead of us.

@fxrcefound : you’re a babe, you know that? Like, just such a good bean! Thank you for putting up with all my bullshit and being so fucking welcoming. I showed up in the fandom and within the first week we had multiple threads. I adore you, as does my Ben. Love’s his princess wife so much, tbh. But, no honestly I’m so glad I’ve found a friend in you. A gem, truly.

@scavenger-warrior : Ahhhh! Hi, I love you. So, first of all let me just say that our beautiful time leap verse (that all of our followers are currently being deprived of bc discord is so much better lol) is one of my all time favourite verses I’ve EVER done. It makes me so immensely happy and Ben is just in love.

@choosenskywalker : I’m TRASH! I’m so excited for the verses we have started, I’m just awful at replying. But, I really am so excited and I adore your writing, you’re very talented. You’re also super sweet and have the patience of a god. Thank you for being lovely, and I swear I’ll get better because I’m so excited to see where these things go.

@aequusjedi & @killingpast : you guys get a joint one because i love our poly babies despite me being a lazy bitch and not writing much with them yet. Nah, can I just say how excited I was when you joined our group Cas. I’m so excited to see how this develops and watch our babies fall in love. Aside from that though, both of you have been just lovely people OOC. I’m so lucky to have such wonderful partners like yourselves.

BENS:

@sithroyal : hey there! We also met in my early days here, and you’ve been such a joy to write with, no matter what character it’s on. You’re portrayal is one of pure perfection. I love writing with you and any reply always makes me so excited. On top of that you’ve been so kind and inviting and it really meant a lot since I was HELLA INTIMIDATED by you when I first got here.

@endheir : LOOK EVERYONE, IT’S J.J. ABRAMS EVIL TWIN, come to fix all the shit J.J. broke. No, seriously I am so impressed and will never not be intimidated by how amazing you and your writing is! THIS IS THE BEN SOLO WE DESERVED! But, you’re such a peach and so nice and I adore plotting with you. Thanks for being the bomb dot com.

@dyadalone : WE ARE CRACK ROYALTY, thank you very much. No, really though I love when we (and our friends) get up to our shenanigans. But, aside from that Poe is also just IN LOVE! And, I adore you OOC. Such a kind and loving person, you da best! I am so happy we found each other through this hellsite and can’t wait to see what nonsense our future brings.

@brokendyad : HELLO I LOVE YOU! You’re such a solid friend and such a talented writer. I’m so happy we get to have so much fun writing and plotting. You’re an absolute dear and I’ll never get over how lucky I am to have such amazing friends. Thanks for being great and I hope we stay close forever.

@lghtpulled : okay, so i can’t explain my infinite love for you. I can’t. All my characters over here being obsessed over your Ben. I’ve told you how much I adore your Ben, but I can’t say it enough. Also, our high school verse GIVES ME LIFE! But, nah you’re just so talented and SO KIND! I’m so glad that despite being SO FUCKING INTIMIDATED by you we managed to form this amazing friendship. I’m keeping you.

THE FAM:

@kesdameronn : SCARF DAD! No, lol I love that Poe’s dad is around. We haven’t done much yet but we have all the time in the world for the Dameron bros to get up to shit together. Also, Zep you are such a kind and cute soul and I just love ya!

@lieutenantxbey : Mama Dameron, how could we not love? Poe loves his mama so much and lowkey wants to be just like her. I love seeing Shara on the dash. And the few times we’ve spoken you’ve been just a ray of light, so keep being awesome.

@legacybeyne : this little shit! No, I’m kidding, Poe loves his cousin. Like wants to throw him out an airlock sometimes, but loves him. I adore this character so much and I’m so happy Poe has more family around. Also, OOC you seem like a super cool person, so definitely don’t stop that.

LUKE:

@jedishope : SHANE! I don’t know if I could tell you how much I actually adore you? Like, I don’t think I could. And, I low-key don’t want to because it would deffo scare you off, lol. But, no you’re just an absolute ray of sunshine and such a beautiful person. A person only has to talk to you for a second to see how just full or love and kindness you are. You bring so much joy to my dash and I’m forever thankful for it! Not to mention your Luke is hands down the best Luke I’ve ever seen. Absolutely perfect! I was so scared to approach you at first because you were just so fucking talented and obviously still are! I love your Luke with my whole heart and so does Poe.

HUX:

@muddledbloodlines : I am so excited for the verse we’ve created for our lonely babies and can’t wait to see where it goes. You have such an interesting take on this character and I love it! I’m so excited to get to know you better and really explore this. I’m honestly just in love with your writing and imagination.

OCS:

@congeriemgriseo : so it won’t tag you, which is RUDE! But, anyway: I adore Any. Such an incredibly well thought out and beautiful OC. I’m quite picky when it comes to OCs, despite having one of my own. But, I was enraptured from the moment I read her bio, and you have not disappointed! She’s such a beautiful little chaos machine and I love her.

@orderengineer : okay, so I actually usually despise OCs that are really kind. Because as much as Mary Sue characters are fine to write, I personally can’t write opposite them. However, that’s not what Syla is! She’s so much more complex than that and I adore her. Both Ben and Orion find her insanely interesting and think she’s super fucking talented. I love this character you've created. It’s also just insane to see my characters name on the dash lol. You’re also such a sweetheart OOC and it always makes my day.

@petitehux : so for anyone who doesn’t know? I LOVE Kat. Like, I am obsessed, I have 100s of photos of her saved on my phone. I am just in love. Her and Dove Cameron are my two ultimate celebrity crushes. Which was the original reason I decided to check out your blog, and I’m so fucking happy I did. Ryann is so fucking cool and I think she brings such an interesting dynamic to the whole trilogy story. I can’t wait for myself to stop being lazy and get some bomb shit going with this incredible OC.

I’M A STALKER (also we need to rp!):

@hopedyad : I love seeing you on my dash and I adore keeping up with your posts. You’re a super talented writer and I hope in the future I stop being a shy bean and we can actually do cool things lol. You seem super sweet and like you’ve got a wicked sense of humor OOC too.

@tornbetweenthestorm : So, I LOVE FN! It’s so great to see such an interesting OC. I adore the work and thought you’ve put into this character and his struggles. Anytime I stop to read one of your replies to a partner I’m just overcome by your brilliance. I’m so happy I stumbled across your blog (thank you tumblr recs) and have been lucky enough to be mutuals with you.

@iamthecrder : well hello there. So, yeah I think your Hux is super cool and right on the money. It’s so interesting to see a different version of him and I honestly think you’re so incredibly talented! Keep being awesome, my good dude.

OTHER:

@mangohub : Monroe. My love, what can I say? You’ve followed me from my original Alec all the way to here. Despite not being a Star Wars fan you still follow me on multiple of your blogs. I will always love you. I will also never stop being astounded by your talent and world building capabilities. In case there was any confusion, YOU ARE MY FAVOURITE PERSON ON TUMBLR. Also, you are the most talented person I’ve ever followed. I will never stop being so happy to see you, no matter the blog, on my dash. On top of being the most talented writer I know, you also happen to be the sweetest human on the planet. You have so much love in your heart and you pour into your friends like it’s going out of style. I’m so so lucky to have you and I love you, okay?

Obviously I don't talk to you lads enough, but a special shoutout to @poewingsdameron, @lightskipped, , @flyjacket, @sprklit & @vuuelo for playing this amazing bean alongside me.

Okay, now onto the giveaway. So, friendly reminder that I make all my own stuff, so if you want examples of my work just check out across my blogs. That being said, when it comes to graphics, icons, etc I’m not very talented with creating stuff myself, so I use other peoples free templates, borders, psds and so on. I think I’m decently talented at putting them together, though. Also, having me do it just saves you a stupid amount of time lol.

Simply enter by liking AND/OR reblogging, the winners will be chosen using a random number generator. I will contact each of you via IM (or discord if we have each other) to discuss getting to work on the prizes. The only real rule is DO NOT SPAM YOUR FOLLOWERS. I’m not gonna put a limit on how many times you can reblog, but be fucking courteous to your followers, okay? This giveaway ends on APRIL 10th at NOON GMT-6.

1st PLACE: 200 icons of the character of your choosing, a promo & a dash icon.

2nd PLACE: 100 icons of the character of your choosing & a dash icon.

3rd PLACE: 100 icons of the character of your choosing.

#☆☆☆ 𝓱𝓸𝓹𝓮 𝓲𝓼 𝓵𝓲𝓴𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓾𝓷 | save #☆☆☆ 𝓳𝓸𝓲𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓲𝓼𝓽𝓪𝓷𝓬𝓮 | promo #100 followers #follow forever #(i love you all a lot okay?)#(and im so thankful for everyone who's joined me on this ride)#(this is long af)#(i dont believe in just tagging people and not telling them why they rock so...)

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the-lupine-sojourner · 6 years ago

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Takara’s Hero Academia Season 2 Episode 5 [Eijiro Kirishima/OC] [Female!Aizawa/Hizashi]

Hey, guys!! Sorry for taking forever on this chapter! I feel really bad this took so long, but I do have a reason; my phone gave out on me and it took a while to get a new one cus I wanted to get my phone repaired but then the people said I needed to just replace it cus it was an iPhone 6 I’ve had for a few years, and then I tried to do an update to get my cellular data back, but then it said I still needed to update my phone to get my cellular data back after I did the update, and yada yada no one cares.

Bottom line, I have a Google Pixel now and I am really liking it so far. Now, let’s stop wasting time and get to the story, okay?! :)

Okay so here’s the Masterist for the Series (sorry I forgot to do that when I posted this lol)! And now for the taglist!

Once again, before I get to that, I have to remind everyone that Hiyoko and Ryuji Tiechida belong to @elite-guard-hardygal !! My bestie is just being incredibly sweet and awesome and letting me use them for a cameo/side-character thing. Love you, galfriend!!

Okay so I’m also tagging @dailyojiromashirao , @souskena , and @fandoms-fandoms-everywhere99 . They are awesome people and I genuinely love hearing their (and everyone else’s) feedback.

Also, real quick: I just saw that my blog has reached 100 followers!! That’s insane!!! Like, literally! Anyway, let’s get to the story for real this time!

Hope you all enjoy this chapter!!

God Bless and Good Day!

~The Lupine Sojourner

(Looky! I made a gif!!)

“You better hope your stupid boyfriend doesn’t mess this up for us, Yamada.” Hiyoko snaps, crossing her arms, nodding toward Katsuki’s team.

I blink, looking back at Katsuki’s team despite myself. “What?” I ask, raising a brow, then blush a little and scoff. “He’s not my boyfriend!” I then decide to change topics. “Just because we’re in the same class doesn’t mean-” I catch myself and clear my throat. “-we have more important things to discuss, like Quirks and strategy.” Hiyoko sighs. I blink. Did she always have cat ear-looking whisps of hair? And whisker-like markings on her face? Guess so...and she has a medial cleft that adds to the cat-like thing she’s got going on. I suppose that’s also part of her Quirk. Huh...

“Fine. Obviously, I got cat-like looks. And I have a solar panel on my back that I can use to store up energy and release it in claws of hardened light. I can use just my fingertips or my toes or both if I want. I can shoot out beams from these three middle fingers,” she holds up the three middle fingers on her left hand and I notice she’s wearing a glove made to fit over the fingers, with metal claws on the fingertips. “but it hurts a lot to do that and it drains my stored energy to almost nothing. That’s about it.” I nod, ignoring the odd, knowing look Ryuji gives me like he saw through my facade of not caring what team Eijiro ended up on. I clear my throat

“I can go next. I have two Quirks, actually; I control earth and water. Not great at earth, but I can track people using vibrations in the ground, so we won’t be caught off guard. Water is much easier, but my Quirk uses my blood sugar, so I can’t do it forever, and earth takes more blood sugar. That’s about it, really, besides having about a 6-meter radius.” I turn to Ryuji. “What’s your Quirk, Ryuji?” Ryuji scratches the back of his neck.

“Well, nothing fancy like yours. I can read people’s emotions, and if I directly tell the person what they’re feeling, it intensifies the feeling. And when I do that, it’s kind of like manipulating them into feeling more than they normally would.” Hiyoko scoffs.

“Yeah. Super annoying when he just spouts off therapist garbage at you because he can tell what you’re feeling.” Ryuji sighs, choosing not to rise to his step sister’s bait.

“Plus, I can’t turn it off. It’s not really my fault, Hiyoko-nee.” I nod. Oh geez. Despite not being able to turn it off, his Quirk is kinda cool!

“Dude, that’s pretty cool!” I reply, smiling. Ryuji smiles, probably sensing my genuine interest in his Quirk.

“Thanks.” He turns to Chiharu. “What about you, Chiharu?” She gestures to her ears.

“Well, I got the wolf Quirk, like Ami, and I can do a really loud bark, but it takes my breath away to do it. And that’s pretty much it.” I nod.

“That’s awesome!” I praise, smiling at her. She grins back.

“I know.” She teases with a wink. “Anyway, um, I know you’re in class 1-A, and Ryuji’s in my class in the General Studies course, but which class are you in, Hiyoko?��

“I’m in Class 1-B.” Hiyoko replies, crossing her arms. “I wanted to get into 1-A, but it didn’t turn out that way.” She seems pretty upset she didn’t get into 1-A, so I smile at her.

“You know, this whole rivalry between the hero classes is pretty stupid. It’s not like we meant to be attacked by villains or whatever, and Katuski is the only asshole in my class. The rest are good people.” I then decide to change topics. “Anyway, let’s talk strategy real quick. I know Hiyoko’s the rider, but who’s the front horse?” Ryuji puts his hand up.

“I know my sister the best out of the three of us and I am most likely the strongest- -no offense- -so I’ll be the front horse and Takara can be right and Chiharu will be left.”

I nod. “Sounds good. Now, do we want to run or try to grab headbands?” Hiyoko scoffs.

“Obviously, we need to play both defense and offense, Yamada. Defend the ones we have and grab a few more to ensure we place well. You all good with that?” I nod.

“Personally, I am. As I said, with my vibration tracking, I can tell where the other teams are and if they’re coming up in a blind spot. Plus, if I get some water I’ll be able to keep them at bay.” I then bite my lip. How was I gonna get more water? I doubt Oba will let me run to a vending machine or something. My range doesn’t reach the stands, either. Shit!

I then decide to try to suck any water I can out of the ground. I find piping below but can’t burst them as they are part of the school and I can’t damage school property, right? There’s not much, but I do add a tiny bit of water to my stash and sigh. I also need food. This game will be rough...I just hope I do well.

I then feel a puddle a little ways away. Izuku is standing by it talking to Ochaco. I raise a brow, but pull the water to me sneakily. Unfortunately, it attracts Mineta’s attention. He looks over and motions for me to walk over. I flip him off and scoot closer to my teammates. We didn’t have long till the game started, so we wait for the headbands to be passed out and we can get into formation. Hiyoko wraps the headband around her head and takes her shoes off.

“Alright, you guys. Don’t screw this up!” Hiyoko calls as the countdown reaches thirty seconds. I smile.

“We won’t. Just climb up already.” She does and Chiharu and I offer support as well as Ryuji. To our right stands a girl with black curly hair and a burly man with a weird bell-like face that looked like some odd helmet. I could see Izuku a little ways away, getting into position with his team.

“Alright! This’ll be fun!” Chiharu purrs, snapping me back to reality, as we make final adjustments to positions and the timer rings. Oba stretches her arms.

“Oh, goodie! It’s time to get this party started!” She cheers.

“Hey, hey! Look alive!, love” Dad prompts and I hear mom groan as she wakes up. I smile at the thought of Mom napping for fifteen minutes as I prepare to run wherever Hiyoko directs us. “After fifteen minutes to form teams and talk strategy, twelve teams are prepared to go head to head!” Dad cheers. Mom hums.

“I’m seeing some unexpected student combinations.” She notes. I bite my lip. Did she not approve of my team?

“C’mon! Everyone, get your hands in the air! It’s time for an arena-pumping UA Battle Royale!” Dda continues. “Lemme hear yah scream!” The crowd cheers eagerly and I bite my lip, trying not to think too much about the crowd watching. I just had to do my best and hope I make it to the next game. “One final countdown before the game starts! 3...2...1…”

“Begin!” Oba Nemuri calls, and it’s off. Hiyoko leans over toward me so we turn that way as we run, away from Izuku and the spotlight. Smart. It appears some other teams have our idea, running from the huge fight and focusing on keep their headbands and stealing if the chance arose. Once we get settled a bit away from everything, I see Izuku and his team take off into the sky!

“Whoa! What the hell?!” I exclaim, shocked. I then see a girl with pink hair in Izuku’s team and a backpack on Izuku’s back. The flying suddenly makes sense, if the pink haired girl is from the support course.

The support course students are allowed to bring their inventions, right? That’s the only way Izuku’s team could have those support items. I have to then focus on our team as we near the team with Tetsutetsu running after Izuku’s team, still airborne, and we nearly bump into Hagakure’s team, Kyoka sending her earphone jacks after Izuku, as well. Tokoyami is evidently on Izuku’s team because next second, Dark Shadow (I’d seen the bird-like thing a few times while we were training. He’s cool!) swats the jacks away.

“Stupid bird!” Kyoka exclaims in frustration. I smirk as we run away. No one in our immediate area was concerned with any team but Midoriya. Thus, as a team with a red-headed girl as rider was distracted, I get Hiyoko’s attention and nod to the team.

“I’ll grab their headband.” I whisper. Hiyoko nods, so I grab one of her two headbands off with a hook of water.

“Hey, what the- -give that back!” I had to be careful how much I use my Quirk because I don’t have unlimited blood sugar here, especially since I had to use my Quirk a lot in the obstacle course. Crap!

Wait, what the--Shoji’s with Mineta?! And Tsuyu?! How’d that pervert manage that?! Well, with Shoji’s arms protecting them, it’s not worth trying to grab their headband, besides...we had a good amount of points. As long as we kept this number, at least for now, I think we’ll be okay.

An explosion rattles the ground and I see Katsuki soaring after Izuku’s team, who had taken off again. “That can’t be legal!” I growl as Dark Shadow blocks an explosion. Hiyoko scoffs as Katsuki begins falling, only for Hanta to send tape out to grab him and yank him back to his team. I raise a brow. If they planned that out, they’re really smart.

“Is that even allowed!?” Dad asks incredulously. Katsuki lands gracelessly on his teammates’ arms, awkwardly shifting back into position and glaring at everyone.

“He never touched the ground, so technically it’s okay.” Oba Nemuri replies. I roll my eyes.

“Oh, hey, Yamada. Your boyfriend’s on that blonde asshole’s team.” I blush scarlet and refuse to look over, feeling more annoyed and irritated then I should that Hiyoko had brought up Eijiro being my boyfriend again after I told her he wasn’t. I knew he was on Katsuki’s team already.

“He’s not my boyfriend and I already knew that.” I growl.

“Calm down and focus on the game, Yamada. Hiyoko-Nee didn’t mean anything.” Ryuji murmurs calmly. I take a breath. Eijiro...wasn’t my boyfriend, much as I’m beginning to want him to be...so there wasn’t any point allowing myself to entertain that fantasy by responding everytime someone teases me about it.

Refocusing, I feel a two-person team rapidly gaining on us and slam a platform up as they leap at us. I smirk as they regain their footing and we keep moving. It was worth the loss in blood sugar.

“Ooo-hoo-hoo! A nice defensive move from Tik- -I mean, um, Takara Yamada of Class 1-A! Nicely done!” Dad gushes and I blush, smiling widely in pride.

“Hizashi, you’re supposed to be unbiased.” Mom chides.

“Yeah, yeah. I know.” Dad replies, and I can practically pouting. That red-head is back all of a sudden, raring to grab her headband back.

“We got a team coming up behind us, Hiyoko.”

“So? Use your earth Quirk!” Hiyoko snaps back.

“I told you, controlling earth is harder.” I reply, trying not to get mad at her again. “We’ll just have to avoid them. I can’t use either of my Quirks too much here. I didn’t get any food after the race, so I’m about half-empty right now.” I explain. Hiyoko huffs.

“Fine. Thanks for the heads up.” She says, looking around and directing us away from the other teams. Ryuji grimaces a little and looks like something’s hurting him, but before I can ask what’s wrong, Dad’s voice booms out over the crowd.

“Now, who wants to take a look at each teams’ points so far?! It’s been seven minutes since the game started, so let’s get those rankings thrown up on the screen!” I blink. It’d been seven minutes already? I glance up and see that we’re between Shoto’s team and Team Kendo, whichever team that is, but...whoa… “Hang on; this is an unexpected turn! Other than Midoriya, Class 1-A’s not doing so hot!” I shrink a little in embarrassment. We weren’t in the top four. Dad obviously saw that, so he’s probably talking about my team as well as the rest of 1-A. Crud… “Even Bakugo is losing!” I feel a tiny little bit better that Dad didn’t single me out, but have to refocus as that red-head comes back around for another try at her headband. We barely manage to get away. Ryuji is definitely pained now, and he’s trying his best, but he’s not as fast as he used to be, so once we’ve gotten fairly clear I decide to ask.

“Hey, Ryuji, what’s wrong?” He forces himself to look more normal.

“Oh, it’s nothing. I just get headaches if there are too many intense emotions around me. The more intense, the more my head hurts.” I wince.

“Eesh. Who’s giving you a headache?”

“Team Bakugo.” He replies. “Specifically Bakugo.” I snort.

“Yeah, I’d imagine so. He’s...very intense.”

“Whatever! Focus!” Hiyoko snaps, not noticing that two person team from before when they change course to come after us, and I look over my shoulder to see that the horse is a girl with ram-like horns and is bounding over the field on all fours, and the rider looks startled that Hiyoko used her claws. I couldn’t do another earth wall, so I settle for warning Hiyoko.

“Close your eyes!” She hisses at us, then when we obey, she uses her sunlight as a kind-of stun ray, and we run past them, snatching a headband for good measure while they were reeling from the bright light. Before they recover, we’re a good distance away, dodging Tsu’’s tongue and Mineta’s balls. I can hear him cackling and saying something, but I don’t care enough to pay attention, focusing on dodging. Then, once we’re settled in the clear, Ryuji bites his lip to muffle a groan.

“C’mon, Ryu-boy, man up! Don’t let your headache stop you!” Hiyoko growls. I frown.

“Ryuji, is it getting worse?” I ask. He nods.

“Yeah. Bakugo’s so pissed off right now, I can’t focus! It’s really ramping up my headache.” I bite my lip.

“Hang on. We’ll try to put some dist- -holy shit you’re right!” I look over and flinch when I see Bakugo’s pure rage, directed at a boy I think is from Class 1-B.

“Monoma you ass, stop taunting him!” Hiyoko calls as we keep running.

“You in his class or something?” I ask.

“Yeah. Keep running!” Hiyoko replies. Despite the distance between our teams, I see the boy, ‘Monoma’, not listening to Hiyoko, twirling what I assume is Katsuki’s headband on his finger and saying something to Katsuki, who’s getting increasingly pissed off, much to his teammates’ concern and fear. But ‘Monoma’ doesn’t seem to mind. He simply keeps speaking, sealing his fate.

Honestly, I pity the guy. He picked the wrong person to-- I feel a team approach and I recognize it as Shoto’s team. Before I can even properly react to that, however, I suddenly feel very tingly, painfully so, and the pain increases as every muscle in my body seized up and I shook as electricity coursed through me. Damn Kaminari and his stupid electricity!

As our team reels back, groaning and aching, my feet suddenly feel icy cold. I try to walk to a warmer area, but I find my feet encased in ice. I blink. Shoto, you ass! Smart move, but still!

“Shoto!” I growl. The teams in the vicinity are frozen to the ground.

“Would you look at that!” Dad calls excitedly. “He’s stuck all those teams cold in their tracks!” I pout a little. Way to state the obvious, dad.

“But only after Kaminari had immobilized the students using his electricity. In the obstacle course, Shoto was surprised at how many people avoided his attack. He’s adapting his strategy.” Mom replies thoughtfully. I had to hand it to Shoto; he was a great strategist.

“Nice commentary, hun!” Dad praises.

“Yamada, melt the ice!” Hiyoko snaps. I look at her in shock.

“I can’t! I use liquid water! I can’t move ice! Defrosting it takes too much of my blood sugar, and I can’t create ice, either. I’m stuck with liquid water!” I reply.

“Ergh! Fine! Cut the ice with the water, then! Hurry!” I nod and begin cutting us out. Chiharu also uses her bark on the ice around her feet, and that helped a lot.

In our haste to get out of the ice, however, I dropped my guard and didn’t hear or feel a team approach till it was too late. Just as I was about to finish smashing a long-handled hammer of water against the last few spots of ice still stuck to us (Ryuji and Chiharu supporting Hiyoko while Chiharu regained her breath after her bark), I hear Hiyoko curse, feel the balance shift, and chuckling I knew all too well. I look up and see Shinso’s team jogging away, Shinso fixing the headband around his neck. I glare at him, feeling angrier than I should at the fact that he stole one of our headbands. We were now below Team Tetsutetsu, and Hiyoko leans forward.

“Shinso, you ass!” I bark, still feeling mad. “Get back here!” He just looks over his shoulder.

“It’s a competition, Takara.” He places emphasis on my first name, smirking as he does. “We can’t be too friendly here.” My eye twitches.

“Shinso, you better giv- -waittaminute...you did not!” I just notice that Shinso’s horses all look listless, eyes never closing...just blank slates. They were under the influence of his Quirk! That asshole brainwashed his teammates into being his horses, and then steals our headband?! No way!

There were less than six minutes left in the game, as I heard from Dad. We had to get our points back and then grab another headband in that time if we wanted to get into the final game. “Yamada, this isn’t the time to get upset!” Ryuji barks. “Focus!” I hardly heard him, whipping the water forward, but Ojiro was on Shinso’s team and his tail shattered my formation. I stagger a little. “See?” Ryuji adds. I grit my teeth, summoning the water back to me. Crap! I can’t lose my cool! He was right! I take a breath.

“Ryuji’s right, Takara. We have to get our points back, but if we lose our cool, that’s not gonna happen.” Chiharu adds. “What’s got you so bent out of shape, anyway? You know this guy?”

“We went to middle school together. He’s my friend. Let’s just go.” We go after him, then Hiyoko leans toward a struggling team with a kinda werewolf-looking front horse. I see that they have more than two headbands and send the water to grab one as we pass. Now, all we had to do was get our headband back. In just over four minutes. I look over and see that Shinso’s gotten a good distance away. “C’mon! We gotta move” I exclaim and race after my middle school friend. We got closer and closer just as I begin to feel woozy and lightheaded. Not good! I stagger on, though, gritting my teeth and pressing forward.

“Hey, Yamada! You okay?” Ryuji asks.

“Y-yeah, I...I’m okay,” I mumble. “Just getting low. Running also takes energy and I’m almost on empty here.” I explain further.

“It would help if you didn’t waste your energy on useless attacks.” Hiyoko snaps. I feel my cheeks heat in embarrassment.

“Fine fine, whatever,” I reply. We didn’t have a lot of time to catch up to Shinso.

“Only one minute left!” Dad exclaims. “Team Todoroki has cornered the 10 million point team and is poised to seize the ultimate prize!” I blink. Oh shit! Izuku better hope he can keep his headband for this last minute! “At least, that’s what I would have predicted five minutes ago!” Dad adds, laughing. I then shake myself and try to keep running, but the world was spinning now and it was hard to go in a straight line.

“Guys, Takara’s getting worse! We gotta hurry!” Chiharu notes, voice rising in concern.

“There’s less than a minute left! Hang on, Yamada!” Ryuji and Hiyoko reply almost perfectly in sync. I grit my teeth and keep running.

“Unbelievably, Team Midoriya has managed to avoid the ice master for the last half of the game!” Dad continues. I try to keep running, but it’s hard when your legs feel like they’re dragging weights behind them. We run by a huge ice wall just as we’re about catch Shinso. Guess Shoto didn’t...want...interruptions...gotta get the headband...Shinso...gotta...gotta focus! I reach out desperately with my water as the time ticks closer to ending. The world starts to go black and all I can think of doing is getting my team to the next game. As if from a distant tunnel, I hear Dad speaking and some commotion, but I can’t focus on that.

Gotta...reach...a little...further….just…

“Tak- -” The world blank as I hear Oba call out the end of the game.

=#=#=#=#=

I come to on the ground, my team around me, looking at me in concern.

“--ney, I think, uh, Team Teichida is having some kind of difficulty there.” I distantly hear Dad saying.

“One of the members passed out, it seems. She looks okay, but still. She shouldn’t have pushed herself so hard.” Mom replies. I feel embarrassed that Mom and Dad were criticizing me in a roundabout way.

“Are you okay?” Chiharu asks, shaking my shoulders. I groan sluggishly. This was not how I wanted to make an impression. As long as we advance, though, it’s worth it.

“...Did...did I do it? Did we get the band?” I mumble, sitting up and holding my head.

“...um...well…” I pale and feel ready to pass out again. No, no, no!

“We didn’t make it to the final game?” Ryuji looks at me sympathetically. He knew how I was feeling.

“No, but we tried our best. That’s what matters.” He says consolingly. It doesn’t help at all. Hiyoko sighs.

“Yeah, you tried damn hard, we all did, but it just...just wasn’t…” She swallows. “It didn’t happen.” Shinso is suddenly behind my teammates, looking at me in concern. Chiharu and Ryuji scoot aside a little so he can help me up.

“You shouldn’t have pushed yourself till you passed out, idiot.” He says. I nod.

“Yeah, but I wanted to get into the next game so bad...I didn’t think straight.”

“Hmm, and I probably shouldn’t have targeted your team like I did. Sorry.” I shake my head, ignoring the way it made me feel dizzy.

“No, no. Like you said, this is a competition. Congrats.” I’d glanced up after he stole our headband and saw that he was in the top four. He nods.

“Thanks. Let’s get you some food.” I shake my head again. I was feeling stronger now, and could make it to the vending machines alone. I...I needed to be alone right now. Luckily, it didn’t seem like Mom and Dad had moved on from my passing out, so I was okay to sneak out and get food. I didn’t want to face my parents right now.

“I’ll be okay, Shinso. I’m gonna go to the bathroom and get myself some food.”

“Food first, Yamada.” Shinso says, understanding why I declined his escort offer and walking away. Chiharu grabs my arm.

“Yeah, let’s go.” I feel my emotions rising and pry her hand off reluctantly.

“I really appreciate it, Chiharu, but I’ll be fine…” I assure her. “I’ll be back in a sec.” I walk away before anyone can call me back and somehow manage to make it to the bathroom before the dam bursts and suddenly I’m sitting on a toilet sobbing my heart out. I didn’t make it into the final game...I failed.

What would Mom and Dad think?! Oh dear Lord I can’t face them! They’re already disappointed, I know it! I tried my hardest and I failed! Thoughts lost all reason and sense at that point, flooding into me and back out again too fast for me to process. After what feels like forever, I manage to get myself together and shakily get to my feet, wobbling as I walk out and find a vending machine. Shinso was waiting.

“You forgot your wallet, Takara.” He says, giving me a small smile over his shoulder. He knew what I’d been doing. It wasn’t like you couldn’t look at me and tell I’d been crying. I instinctively lean my head on his shoulder tiredly as he inserts a bill and presses the buttons for gummies. Those gummies had a lot of sugar. Good. He lets my head lull to the side while he grabs the gummies and hands them to me. He then walks over to the drink machine and gets himself and I water. He then walks over to a bench and I follow.

“...Thanks, Shinso.” I mumble around a few gummies as we sit down.

“Don’t mention it. Now we’re even, right?” I chuckle.

“Yeah, I guess so.” I lean on his shoulder again. “Can I stay here a sec? I don’t want to go back yet.” He nods.

“Not too long, but yeah. Get yourself together.” I chuckle again and eat more gummies in silence. Why was he different than Eijiro? Why can I lean on his shoulder and not get super flustered?

Maybe it’s just that Shinso’s been around too long. I never grew attracted to him romantically because he had been there since before I thought of boys like that. He’d been my friend so long it was hard to picture him as anything else. Regardless, it was nice that he knew he didn’t have to give me a pep talk. He just had to be here, letting me lean on his shoulder for a moment. This was a moment I needed to collect my thoughts and composure. Not getting into the final game had been a blow.

I tried as hard as I could, but couldn’t quite get that headband we needed to get into the next game. That was that, no need to get caught up other thoughts.

“Oh, good. You’re feeling a little better.” Comes Ryuji’s voice as he rounds a corner. I smile at him.

“Yeah, a little. Sorry for worrying you guys.” I mumble. Ryuji smiles.

“Sorry I didn’t stop you using your Quirk sooner. That last formation took too much out of you. I should have said something.”

“Nah, I’m the idiot that made the formation despite knowing it really wasn’t my best move. I just really wanted to grab our headband.” Shinso sighs.

“And I really wanted to get into the next game.” I chuckle.

“I know. I don’t hold it against you. Oh, by the way, this is Teichida Ryuji. Ryuji, this is Hitoshi Shinso, a guy I- -”

“Went to middle school with.” Ryuji interjects, smiling. “You mentioned when he stole our headbands.” I frown, munching on the last of the gummies.

“Oh. Really? Sorry.” He shakes his head.

“No worries. You wanna head back or do you want me to bring someone here? You still seem pretty upset.” I sigh. While I did want to hug Eijiro right now, I’m not sure I want him to know how badly I reacted. “I mean, um, I- -” Ryuji looks flustered, waving his hands around a little frantically.

“It’s fine, Ryuji. Um...I think I’m okay to walk back, slow, but I don’t really want everyone knowing what I did, so…”

“You look like shit, Takara. That’s not going away easily.” I sigh.

“Thanks, Shinso…” Shinso points to the bathroom sign.

“Go back in there and splash your face with cold water a few times, don’t rub your eyes, and pat it dry.” He then holds up my water bottle. “Then chug this.” I nod. He had probably done this before and knew how to hide it. I felt horrible I couldn’t always help him when he got depressed and felt awful, but I do what I can.

I walk in and the water feels great on my face. I splash it a few times and gently wipe all the tear streaks away and pat my face dry. I feel better and come out.

Immediately, Shinso hands me my water. I drink it down and feel even better. I start walking back and side-hug Shinso when he catches up.

“I really appreciate this, Shinso.” I tell him. He nods.

“No problem. Just don’t mention it.” I nod in pretend sobriety.

“Riiight. Can’t let anyone know you actually feel things.” I tease. He chuckles, knowing I didn’t mean it literally.

“No, not at all.” He replies, then leaves me to walk the rest of the way over to my teammates. I wasn’t totally better but I was coming to grips with not being in the final game and I guess that was about all I can do at this point.

I can’t change the past. I can only live with it.

#Fanfiction #OC Insertion Series #MHA #BNHA #OC #Original Character #Original Female Character #Eijiro Kirishima #Eijiro Kirishima/OC #Takara Yamada (OC)#Eijiro Kirishima/Takara Yamada #Takara's Hero Academia

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squeemcsquee · 6 years ago

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Anime Central 2019, Day One (Friday)

So, our Friday got off with a slightly rocky start. Some of us had to go claim badges still, some just had their usual morning routines delayed, etc. So in the hours between waking up and hitting the con proper, everyone was doing something different. @shbumi and I started off with Pokemon Go.

I had signed all of us for an escape room hosted by Experimental Gamer. And the time slot I chose? 10:00 - the exact time when the various areas of the con opened up.

Yeah, in retrospect, waiting a little may have been a better option. But sadly, it didn’t matter. Because we walked up to the room and got some bad news.

Although they were all set up, they were having computer issues. We were offered a refund right away, or the option to reschedule for later in the con - with the understanding that we would be refunded if things couldn’t be worked out. We still wanted to give the experience a shot, so we opted to re-schedule.

But then it became a “What do we do with ourselves?” In my case, I went back to the Hilton to grab my phone battery, which I’d forgotten. I figured I would snap pics on the way there and back. The others all scattered off to do their own things.

Once I had my battery, I went to a basic wig care panel with @el-draco-bizarro that was hosted by Oriana Peron - she had awesome tips. Sadly, as often as I have attended these panels and taken notes, stuff doesn’t stick. That would probably be why I have yet to wash the hairspray from my Catra wig from Acen...oops.

Still, my inability to remember wig care tips that I write down isn’t anyone’s fault but mine and I highly recommend Oriana’s panels if you can attend one.

During the panel, I was getting email updates from the escape room team. Our group was able to reschedule for noon. We’d chosen a sci-fi scenario for our escape room.

youtube

We got into the room area, and it was a wee bit cramped for 7 people. Actually, we had 8 people, since the rep from Experimental Gamer was sometimes in there with us. The room was functional, but not at 100%, so he was there in case we hit bugs that weren’t part of the scenario.

This poor lighting is honestly how things were at first - one of the first goals for any group is to get the power up and running. And, partly due to tech issues and partly due to our group splintering into smaller groups that weren’t always communicating, it took forever to get the lights on.

We kept stepping over each other but it was a very cool setup. Once we did get things running, we started making decent progress.

There were even weird specimens in jars and we got to play scientist!

Normally, you get 45 minutes to solve the puzzle. Because of the tech issues and, I think, because it was a slow day, the Experimental Gamer rep very kindly allowed us double that amount of time. We did finally solve the room in a way that allowed us to escape.

I would love to try their horror-themed room or even to do that room again, with everything working correctly. I hope ACen brings them back. I also hope they get advertised better, too - they were never listed in the guidebook app, and were announced only a week or so before the con, so they weren’t in the physical program book either.

From the escape room, we diverged again. My next event was rather educational.

Some of what was covered was common. Vampires as a way to explore forbidden aspects of sexuality, etc. But I wish I had taken notes, as there were a few aspects regarding werewolves that I had not considered. And they also spoke about Frankenstein’s monster and the impact of that story on culture. It was all super fascinating. I really am a fan of both of these individuals and when they pair up for an education panel, I know I’m going to enjoy it.

Afterwards, it was time to explore a bit. The Exhibits Hall (aka dealer’s room) was in the same area as it’s been since I started going to ACen in 2016, but that isn’t a bad thing. The layout gets tweaked a bit each year, though. Still, as usual, it had all kinds of merch and industry booths.

The Fate/Grand Order USA Tour was also making a stop at ACen. They had a really cool booth set up to explore.

The Bang Zoom! voice acting auditions were at Anime Central again, and as before, they were in a portion of the Exhibits Hall. This year, they were auditioning for parts in the Sword Art Online: Alicization arc and boy, was I actually tempted to go up. But there’s something intimidating about auditioning in full view of thousands of others. Still, I sort of regret not trying it. Especially as one of @lechevaliermalfet and I’s nieces has gotten into SAO - auditioning would have been a cool memory to share with her.

Eric Maruscak was back to do his usual thing. Like last year, he was in the Exhibit Hall. His art always turns out super awesome, and it’s fun to keep checking in on it through the weekend.

After wandering around, acquiring some merch (I now have a Gatomon plush and I am so happy!) and stopping back at the room at the Hilton, it was time for another panel.

(I didn’t realize until I started doing the write-up, but we went back to the rooms more than I thought we did. Well, we had to eat, and that’s where the food was stashed! Though coordinating someone making dinner in an instant pot for 7 people is...difficult.)

This was the first of two Crispin Freeman Q&A panels during the weekend. This one, titled, Why We Love This Stuff So Much, was focused more on anime and fandom in general. And @lechevaliermalfet stepped up to ask a question regarding Crispin’s work as Shannon in Scrapped Princess.

From there, we briefly wandered into Helen McCarthy’s panel on The Manga Beatles. I wish we had stayed with @shbumi to the end of it. It was interesting, although I admit that I was starting to tire a little from the day’s events. It was getting on toward 2100 when that panel started.

Being at a distance where I couldn’t fully really the slides + late hour (for me, because I have a job that requires me to keep stupid early hours usually) = tired @squeemcsquee. And we had to leave early to get into line for Anime Hell (though @shbumi stayed to panel’s end and actually got seated not too far from us, all things considered, even though she lined up wayyyy later).

The usual pre-show slide shenanigans were in play. And when the videos started...well, I have some odd searches and moments from group chat saved to my phone. For an example:

After the insanity that was Anime Hell, it was time to turn in. Day One ended on a high note. I also want to mention that Day One was also the day Pokemon Go released the new lure modules and Eevolutions, so I made sure to get a Leafeon and Glaceon ASAP. I even snagged shinies, since i’d saved some back from Eevee weekend!

All Anime Central 2019 coverage:

1. Day Zero Report

2. Day One Report (current post)

3. Day One Cosplayers, Part 1

4. Day One Cosplayers, Part 2

5. Day Two Report

6. Day Two Cosplayers, Part 1

7. Day Two Cosplayers, Part 2

8. Day Three Report

9. Day Three Cosplayers (current post)

#anime central 2019 #acen 2019 #prose and cons #convention review #convention report #acen #anime central

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marianne-dash-wood · 2 years ago

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I posted 19,453 times in 2022

That's 4,172 more posts than 2021!

6 posts created (0%)

19,447 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@theminecraftbee

@beacon-lamp

@prismartist

@actualbiplane

@habeascorpseus

I tagged 64 of my posts in 2022

#scarecrow au - 2 posts

#gooood goooood i love thia - 1 post

#trans!c!wilbur my favourite hc - 1 post

#the layers to this - 1 post

#bdubs is me but i cant be arsed - 1 post

#everyone shut up about dnf - 1 post

#dream is wearing a minecraft poem hoodie - 1 post

#that is very very important - 1 post

#this - 1 post

#this is why i want sewing and other handicrafts to be more accessible - 1 post

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#fast fashion sucks but it's cheaper to buy a £3 t-shirt than it is to make it out of the cheapest polyester fabric with the time investment

My Top Posts in 2022:

Scrolling through your blog like my morning newspaper, I was reading your tags and—as someone who was part of the HTTYD/RttE fandom for years, Hiccup and Toothless were a pretty popular romantic ship (in fact, second only to Hiccup and Astrid). I spent all my time shipping Fishlegs and Snotlout so it wasn’t my circle, but boy did I see a lot of it adjacent to my ships! Anyways, no point to this ask besides seeing your tags and it like, unlocking a deeply buried memory within me but lmaooo I hope you’re having a nice day!

WHAT

WHY

THIS IS A PART OF FANDOM I HAVE NEVER HEARD OF BEFORE LMFAOOOOOOO

0 notes - Posted November 15, 2022

My LARP weapons!!! I'm very excited lol

0 notes - Posted April 5, 2022

DROP KICKS YOUR ASKBOX. HEY! LISTEN! /P MUTUAL VALENTINE TIME ART FROM ROSERRIE! MJ YOU’RE EPIC HAVE AN AWESOME DAY W YOUR PARTNER!

LUNA BELOVED!!! THIS IS SO LOVELY, I HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY TOO!!!!!

1 note - Posted February 14, 2022

Hi! I'm a huge fan of scarecrow au (literally have read it minimum 5 times now, each part) and was wondering if you two plan on continuing it. I'm sooo curious about what bad & sapnap were talking about 😭😭

Hey!! Thank you so much for reading our silly little au, we're so glad you enjoyed it!

Short answer: yes!

Long answer: What we have left that we want to write is a short coda set five years after the end of the sequel. However, we're both working adults and are insanely busy - I think we have about... 1/3 written? Unfortunately, it is neither of our top priorities rn, though I am hoping to get back to it before Christmas.

Once the coda is done, there will most likely be no more mainline installments. We may end up writing a couple of oneshots (I have an SBI one shot floating around in my brain for scarecrow au) but that's no guarantee of anything.

2 notes - Posted October 17, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

anyway you don't normally hear from me but I am trying desperately to cultivate my online experience and if I block anyone it isn't a condemnation it's just me trying to make my dash for *me*

4 notes - Posted November 10, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #I am not using Tumblr right but I don't care

0 notes

snkpolls · 7 years ago

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SnK Chapter 99 Poll Results

The chapter 98 poll closed with 1,751 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated.

RATE THE CHAPTER 1,722 Responses

On the “awful” to “awesome” scale of 1-5, nearly 70% of respondents rated “Guilty Shadow” with a “5″, making it the highest rated chapter since we started polling. Well done, Isayama!

On that day, Marley received a grim reminder... this chapter woke up the obsessed snk fan in me, finally JESUS CHRIST

SNK has always been a wild ride, but I don't believe I've ever been this excited and frustrated that I don't have the next chapter in my hands RIGHT NOW- if only to satisfy the itch of knowing which half-hidden face is who from Paradis. And also to figure out what they've done to Porco, Pieck and Zeke to neutralize them while Eren gives Reiner the most uncomfortable tableside chat.

My heart was pounding throughout the entire chapter. The last time that happened was chapter 84 and I gotta say, I finally feel like this whole Marley arc has been worth it. What an adrenaline rush it's become! Now that's now Attack On Titan is supposed to be. I can't wait to see everybody else again and proceed to reach the climax of the story.

The hype for SNK 100 is too real. Everything will explode

I need Ch100 right now immediately. Waiting another month is going to be torture. In the meantime I hope Porco and Pieck enjoy their time in the pit. If it turns out that Helos is Levi I will eat my own platform boots

It was amazing. Really great story.

I'm so glad this chapter is fake and SnK ended last month with everyone having a huge pizza party!

....is it December yet?

DID THIS CHAPTER SHOOK YOU? 1,711 Responses

To not be excited by this chapter was simply not an option, but I’ll assume that those who voted “Yes” are slightly more subdued than the majority of us who shouted “AW YISS”.

omfg hype for next chapter!!! How does Eren not have a leg, it really should've grown back, this doesn't make sense. Why is he even there, I feel like I missed something but it's probably just this manga's bizarre structuring. I've been selling my soul the past few months. There is nothing more to sell.

Kill me now The hype is REAL. I had a feeling issue #100 would be THE BANGER. This issue (#99) however set the stage for the next one. We have potentially Connie and Jean going undercover, we have Willy's solution that is just about to be revealed, the Asian woman's sudden leave, etc. I am really excited to see what will happen next month. Just need to add: seeing Eren's hand cut to threaten Reiner and Falco was such a power move, I had chills all over.

Boy howdy this was crazy I'll tell you what

Holy crap I love isayama. What a genius!

God help me I cannot wait another month

Endgame right here, brothers.

#shooketh

WHAT SIDE CHARACTER MOMENT DID YOU MOST APPRECIATE? 1,720 Responses

The giant red chunk that wins this question is the “All of the Above” option with 26.4% of the vote. “Every character with a partially hidden face” was second with 23.8%. There was plenty of excitement around Trapdoor-kun. He came in third with close to 20% of the vote.

I hope the SnK world has a heaven or some shit, because then Bertolt can maybe be finally happy together with his dad at least ;-;

ANNIE IS ALIVE AND FREE CHAPTER 100 HYYYYYYPE

I love moment with Trapdoor-kun/Connie (I hope it's him). He promised Reiner in Utgard Castle that he'll return the favor and I want to see their reunited. Maybe Connie will save Gabi and the other kids in this shitstorm. Please Isayama! Connie needs his personal moment!

ON THE SCALE FROM “FLUFFY KITTEN” TO “ACTUAL PENNYWISE”, HOW CREEPY WAS EREN IN THIS CHAPTER? 1,727 Responses

Eren’s creep factor was strong! More than 70% of us picked a 4 or 5 on the “Actual Pennywise” scale.

Eren is 100% savage. Damn I'd be lying to myself if I said I didn't like him. His meddling works so well with his bitter ass and his sense of entitlement over making all these fuckers taking his freedom away disappear and get their comeuppance (read: the whole world). Fucking human worms.

Eren using Falco as a hostage makes me cry

Eren gave me fucking chills of fear

I'm loving this Eren alignment shift. Lawful Good boy is changing and I am HERE for this.

Eren's "Same reason as you" and "I don't have a choice" are the single most savage moment in the series.

I don't like Eren at all... Poor Reiner

Eren is frickin INSANE

ON THE SCALE FROM 1 - 420/69, HOW MUCH DID EREN ACTIVATE YOUR HARDENING ABILITIES IN THIS CHAPTER? 1,713 Responses

The creep factor and hobo hair didn’t hurt Eren’s attractiveness for the majority of the fandom since 36.1% would love to be locked in the basement with him right now. The second most popular choice was the extreme opposite. 22.2% selected “ewww no” on the question about Eren’s attractiveness.

why did y'all have to write "Lock me in your basement, Hobo Daddy!"

Protect Reiner Braun You've made me have sexual thoughts about long haired Eren, damn you pollster!!!!

Eren made both my jaw and panties fall straight to the floor. It's finally getting somewhere.

my mom called eren hobo daddy o__O"

Eren being so chilled out and yet so chilling at the same time...how does one being so cold make the room seem a lot hotter than it actually is?!

I want to officially shame Eren for telling Mikasa to cut her hair during training and now he could model for L'Oréal (I love his hair but he is a hypocrite)

EREN FUCKING JAEGER. I want to say he's cool... but I feel so strangely conflicted. I'm turned on by his loony face but at the same time fucking terrified that it's all going to crumble. He'd grown so much. I can't believe the kid that we used to adore has turned into such a beast.

eren would be a 4/5 if he shaved his facial hair imo

WHAT WAS EREN’S MOST CHILLING MOMENT? 1,717 Responses

Again with the “All of the above” as top pick. The most popular write in was “Reiner. Sit”. We clearly made a mistake when we forgot to include that.

Reiner. Sit.

His eyes all the time, they're like windows to hell

Everything! Eren was so chilling and bad this chapter, I love love loved it!

The fact that he's still missing a leg, it should've grown back, does he just keep cutting it off?

Messing with the head of an already mentally unstable Reiner

Eren did not come to play. Cutting his hand was a power move and then when he said "same as you." I can't wait to see him transform into a Titan. Reiner wasn't ready for this. He looks like he's gonna pass out.

I never thought i needed psycho!eren and badass!eren in my life. But then i read this chapter and HOOOOOOLY SHIT!

WHICH OF REINER’S TORTURED FACES WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 1,707 Responses

I’m borrowing a quote from a friend who said, “Reiner had enough panels of his sanity crumbling like pie crust to fill a photo album”. We thought so too and had a hard time limiting ourselves to just these six. The look of horror on page 20 was Reiner’s expression as Eren told him, “I’m the same as you. I didn’t have any other choice.” It was the winner with 44.5% of the voice.

Note to Isayama: If you want to torture a character, hands on the face is the way to go (even when those hands are strangely tiny.)

Don't freak out, Reiner, your buddy Eren has come to save the world just like you've always wanted.

I wonder how bad will Reiner's strabismus be when Eren ultimately touchs the Bertolt and Annie subject.

Someone please protect Reiner D: (and maybe give him a hug)

ISAYAMA STAHP TORTURING REIGNER!

#stopreinerabuse2017 >:)

Reiner is the true victim here man

If Reiner didn't have a drinking problem before he sure has one now

I really don't like seeing Reiner looking so scared... It makes me feel so bad and helpless because I can't do anything. ;-;

I’m expecting Reiner to go full insane next chapter. Seriously, he can only be pushed so far!

I absolutely love Reiner's suffering faces :D I also loved how shocked Falco was. I have a feeling that something bad is going to happen, that why Eren told him to stay. He wants to save his life. I only wonder what will happen with the other kids.

reiner has baby hands

CAN YOU PINPOINT THE EXACT MOMENT FALCO’S HEART SHATTERED? 1,700 Responses

This was not a fun chapter for our poor little bean. There was no shortage of moments with him looking on with wide-eyed horror as the situation was unfolding. His expression on page 35 was the landslide winner. It’s the moment Falco realized Eren must’ve met Reiner during his time on Paradis.

My boy Falco doesn't deserve this.

DONT HURT BABBY FALCO

Calm the f down Eren! You’re scaring Falco!

Falco is too precious for this messed up world

WHAT IS RANDO MCSOLDIER WHISPERING TO MADS? 1,709 Responses

We have a poll meme now and don’t think I wont use it! Thank you to the 29.1% of you for playing along. We were a close second. Thank you also to everyone who took the question seriously. One respondent suggested they might be whispering about the fact that all the warriors were missing. I love that thought.

Yes. There's sour cream in Marley.

For the question of what Rambo McSoldier whispered, I'm actually kinda wondering if he's whispering about someone being missing from the crowd. (I.e, Reiner.)

how much farther is my sour cream joke going to go

I do NOT trust Eren one bit and we still do NOT know if there's sour cream. Crazy stuff man.

This wasn't an option for the question about what the soldier was whispering to Mads, but I thought it had to do with that panel where the guy on the rooftop said to "report it" no matter how small it is. The Marley soldier was relaying that report, whatever it is.

The lack of concern over the disappearance of all the Warriors from the audience is alarming...unless it's part of their plan, which removing the fighters from the crowd sounds like something inline with what Paradis would be attempting if they're about to hijack the play.

CHARACTER ALLEGIANCES! WHICH SIDE DO YOU THINK EACH PERSON IS ULTIMATELY SUPPORTING?

So much uncertainty here! We are truly divided over Willy, Zeke and Kiyomi’s loyalties.

I do not think that Zeke would be on Paradis side, he had that chance and discarded it as an idiot.

The Warhammer Titan seems to know so very much about Paradis and the truth (and Eren's name) that I think it's no coincidence he looks like an adult long hair Armin.

Willy was such a sweet pie in this chapter. I wish he joined the Team Paradise.

Why did the Asian lady wish Willy good luck and then immediatly got away from the play as fast as she could? The plot thickens...

Everyone need to calm tf down and stop being huge mega douchebags on the whole warriors vs paradis sides of the fandom Ima lose my goddamn mind let yams tell the fucking story. This fandom is killing me far more effectively than yams ever could, crying Reiner or no!

The Asian lady and the rest of the Azumabito definitely know something, as they didn’t stay for Willy’s play, and she said that “she hoped he’d play his role ‘safely’”

What is Willy's game? With so many important people there, it is setup for a massacre. But, why tell the truth beforehand? There is a part of me thinking that it is all a setup to Willy simply saying we're all going back to Paradis.

WHAT ALLIANCE DO YOU THINK IS MOST LIKELY? 1,697 Responses

EZ and REZ feelz so strong! A sizable percentage think Kiyomi is also a part of the alliance.

I love/hate how much Isayama plays with us (?).. this is the worst who is with who and why and when and how is it its 99 chapters and i am stiff as confused as when i watched the first anime chapter in 2013...

Yeah, I still believe in Reiner + Zeke + Eren alliance. Grim Reminder won't happen and I will be a happy, happy fan." İt's amazing!

I think Willy is working with Armin, whereas, Eren is working with Zeke. Isayama did say they were going to split.

I think Zeke is helping Eren for the time being but I also think it is only a temporary alliance. He will double-cross Paradis like he did the Restorationists and Marley before the end, and he will be a sizable end-game threat to both Paradis and Marley.

"Lady" Kiyomi of the Azmabito family seemed like she was teasing Willy before his performance, since he was so nervous. But then, she said "you're very brave. And you know our family very well", she seemed like she was threatening Willy

I ABSOLUTELY LOVE CRAZY EREN. I think he's gonna offer an alliance with Reiner so they can both save the Eldians. I hope the SC will appear next chapter!

I'm willing to bet 'The Owl' Eren knew Willy and the Asian chick when he was still living.

WHY WERE PORCO AND PEICK SEPARATED? 1,715 Responses

62% believe Porco and Pieck were captured to keep them from meddling. An even larger majority believe Zeke was in on it. Hmmmm....

about porco and pieck. I think they will be locked somewhere. But not to take their titan. Well, it's good opportunity to take their titan but... who wants do that anyway? Jean, connie? I think not.

PLEASE SAVE PIECK

"We done fucked up" -peick and porco

My favourite panel is Pieck looking at 'springer, not a shower' whilst falling into the sin bin. Wow, she's perfect.

Porko remains oblivious

WAS ZEKE PART OF THE PLOT TO SEPARATE PORCO AND PEICK? 1,701 Responses

That would be a solid “yes”.

Zeke does seem to comply with too much questionable activity to not be working secretly with someone. He doesn't question being separated from Pieck and Porco, he's the only one not facing the guard that summons them, he let - encouraged- Reiner to go with Falco right as the ceremony started, and the baseball mitt Eren had likely had something to do with him. The Zekeret is still a wild card though so it makes all this hard to pinpoint.

WHO IS THE SOLDIER THAT TOSSED PORCO AND PIECK INTO THE BALL PIT? 1,691 Responses

Nearly 80% of the fandom thinks Connie is parading around Marley as a very tall Marleyan soldier. The write in responses on this were insane!

A pikupork shipper

Hajime Isayama

The Plothelping Titan

If Pieck knows him, the most probable option is Connie, buuuut... Is he even taller than Porco? He used to be really short, has he grown up?

When I first read the chapter and found similiarities between Connie and the trap-kun soldier I was like "what the fuck?!" And than I thought Connie being that soldier would be absolutely LIT.

I don't think any of the background characters are people we know. We saw how Isayama does that with Amputee-Kun, he appeared several chapters before the official reveal and there was no doubt once it was done. Trapdoor-kun, Helos Cosplayer, anyone else? Nope. as expected of pieck, she figured out the soldier was an impostor

Personally I really hate how people are making these predictions and analyzing details like chin shape in attempt to recognize him. We simply do not see enough of his face to tell who it is so it's pointless that people are arguing about it so vehemently. It could be Connie. I could be Levi. It most definitely isn't Armin. It could be a whole lot of people but right now at least half of the people will be wrong about it so arguing is going to get us nowhere. End of rant.

Zofia from the future, who traveled through paths

DID PIECK PASS A MESSAGE TO THE SOLDIER SHE HUGGED? 1,717 Responses

Yes. As expected. WHO IS THE HELOS COSPLAYER? 1,703 Responses

Jean trounced this poll question with 64.4% of the vote. “No one important” was second with 18.4%. 8% are hopeful it’s Levi.

A Majestic Stallion

A member of Paradis Team, but it is too early to say who

Jean dressed up as Levi aka the REAL Helos (Deja Vu).

Kenny "The Ripper" Ackerman rides again!

I want the Helos cosplayer to be Hange, but if it's not, Armin would be interesting.

WHAT ARE YOU MOST HOPEFUL FOR IN CHAPTER 100? GO NUTS AND CHOOSE AS MANY AS YOU WANT. 1,718 Responses

1,161 (67.6%) Seeing the rest of the SC

1,134 (66%) Annie. Please. It’s been 84 years,

1,027 (59.8%) Information about character loyalties

1,013 (59%) Learning Willy’s “one solution”

875 (50.9%) The Warhammer Titan

788 (45.9%) Eren wreaking havoc

781 (45.5%) More Reiner suffering

747 (43.5%) RIP everyone sitting in the audience at the play

652 (38%) Grim Reminder

565 (32.9%) Action with the Asian Clan

534 (31.1%) Overwhelmed Falco turning into a falcon and flying away

Seeing the rest of the Survey Corps is our dearest wish, followed by a sighting of Annie. The most common write-in was simply “Levi”.

RIP Gabi and everyone else in the audience. But mostly Gabi.

I'm saying it now - there won't be another Grim Reminder. It would be the worst possible move to make. However, I can see some sort of staged assault happening.

What if chapter 100 is just an elaborate reenactment of the finale of shrek two where shrek and the gang ambush the castle with a collosal gingerbread man whilst fairy godmother sings. Honestly I would pay good money to see willy start singing 'i need a hero' with a choir behind him make it happen isayama I believe in you.

I am going to sell my soul for chapter 100

All the pieces are being set in place. It is about to begin. We don't know for sure what will happen but things are about to get wild. Prepare the feelingstrain cause we're all hopping aboard

HOW BADLY DO YOU WANT TO RETURN TO THE ORIGINAL CAST ON PARADIS? 1,712 Responses

No matter how great a chapter is, we remain desperate for the original cast. Last month 34.5% select “5” on the poll. This month that number was up to 38.1%.

And gimme some of that paradis crew daddy yamyams ✊️💦✊️💦😩

I'm severely lacking in Ackervitaminz

I'm tired of Marley to be honest. I hope next chapter shakes me, because this chapter didn't at all.

i still wanna know what the little miserable gremlin man is doing and my badass child Hanji

I loved the Marley chapters, but GOD I NEED MY PARADIS CREW THE SNEAK PEAKS ARE KILLING ME

while I haven't really been in any rush to return to the main cast, I'll be really excited to learn that they've all infiltrated Marley in this way, and for some final smack down to begin soon.

It's just a setup chapter I just want my Mikasa fix.

GIVE ME MIKASA AND ARMIN BACK. I MISSED MY BABIES. I WOULD SELL BOTH OF MY KIDNEYS TO SEE THEM WELL AND HAPPY AGAIN. JUST GIVE ME THAT WISH ON CHAPTER 100 ISAYAMA. AM I ASKING TOO MUCH?

WHICH CHARACTERS DO YOU GENERALLY ENJOY THE MOST 1,717 Responses

Cries forever for my vets.

Nearly 100 chapters in and I feel like I'm losing my damn mind. Oof. Isayama...amazing. PS: I will continue to select 'The Vets' even long after The Vets are gone!!!

(fist bumps you, my friend!)

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES 1,695 Responses

Last month this question was 40% Tumblr and 48% Reddit. This month Reddit was most active on the poll with 56.8% of the responses. The other platforms remained consistent.

"Where do you primarily discuss the series" giving 4chan the silent treatment? Although I guess what they do doesn't really count as discussing.

ANY OTHER CHAPTER THOUGHTS YOU'D LIKE TO SHARE? We had 360 write-in responses and some were essay sized in length! Thank you all for your enthusiasm! Here’s a portion of the comments.

EXTRA DANCC

It's about to be lit fam

NERD-SQUAD TO THE RESCUE! Nothing but goosebumps for that entire chapter thankyou.

If Helos is actually a lie created by Marley and Tybur, then was the devil of all the earth a lie too? Or did it exist in reality? Will it return? And how the hell could Tybur know of Kenny and Uri sitting in front of that lake? Does he have some spies on Paradis? All this stuff is just becoming more and more fishy...

I want everyone to die.

Is it just me or did Reiner lose weight? Not aroused. Isayama sensei please try harder.

Pieck grabbing Zophia's shoulders. 100%. A+. As expected.

Okay, so, we've been speculating like mad on how Eren arrived in Marley. Reiner asked the same thing. And Isayama, through Eren's words, answered us: "is that really what you want to ask first?" LIKE DAMN, at this point I'm sure Isayama reads our blogs. At least he answered the "Why", kinda...

for god sake. reiner's suffering have to stop TTTTT-TTTTT

Bertl deserve this world.

Isayama has officially changed his icon to Reiner. Protagonist confirmed. It was Reiner's story all along. We were just along for the ride. The very traumatic ride.

I love the parallel between Reiner and that old man that hanged himself back in Paradis. I'm quite sure that Reiner, like the hanged-man, is looking for judgement. Cool to see how Bert nightmares played a big role in the end.

sc stans are insane I wonder how bad will Reiner's strabismus be when Eren ultimately touchs the Bertolt and Annie subject.

needs more porco

Is Eren gonna sacrifice himself for the sake of saving the world as a scapegoat? Will his death be the only meaningful one in the whole series??

I hope to God Armin has a different haircut.

Learning that we're getting ova of Lost Girls and reading this chapter was the best way to start my week. I love you I wish Isayama hadn't made Reiner so hot. Too hard to focus on everything else going on =\

if reiner wants to get judged maybe he should look to judge judy for judgement, that'd be lit

I love my shifter kids, but they're fucked.

I don’t personally think there will be a Grim reminder 2.0, Paradis people, ie Armin, Hanji and all, usually don’t fight fire with more fire, they plan better shenanigans. Also, how they would be considered better than marleyans if they did the same stuff? They won’t play this low, they also know that Grim reminder™️ Is everything but effective.

Isayama why it's great that we have all those informative, descriptive chapters but something need to happen. I hope that next chapter will be full of action.

SHOW ME MIKASA AND LET HER AND EREN BE MARRIED. And let annie be alive and well and dont make reiner any sadder. #chap100 No

Soldier, who are you? Willy, what are you really trying say? Eren, will you start causing some trouble? Levi, come out!" AAAAAAAAAAAaa!!!!

Pieck was actually exactly right! I always loved her design and oppressed but trying her best herb merchant aesthetic. So cool that she saved the lives of Reiner and Zeke, her influence on character relationships and the plot.

In RtS I wanted Reiner dead. Half to end his suffering, half to be vindicated for the things he'd done, but I guess it was Berty Beetle's turn.

I miss Levi so much, it's been such a long time since we've seen him and all I want is for him to keep his promise to Erwin and obliterate Zeke. I can see him now, sitting with his arms crossed as Zeke enters the room. "Been a while, you piece of shit. Not so tough now when you're not ripping a bunch of people in half with rocks, eh?" He cracks his knuckles. "I will destroy you. I will make it hurt. Because you killed Erwin Smith and I promised him, I *promised him* that I would end this fight for him." Ahhhh please Isayama. <3

CHAOS FOR THE CHAOS GOD The slow build has been so worth it, we're all going to hell and I can't wait

Annie is alive. That shouldn't be a point of discussion anymore,

Please make my children happy, they suffered enough

I really think Jean is the Helos cosplayer because of face/mouth shape. That might be wishful thinking though :') Also DAMN EREN REALLY IS HOBO DADDY

ISAYAMA CAN YOU PLEASE DRAW BERTL FAMILY OR PHOTO OF HOOVER HOUSE OR WHAT SO I CAN REST IN PEACE I WANNA BERTL AGAIN I DONT CARE WITH OTHERS

I just want to say that the chapter 99 pre release megathread on /r/ShingekiNoKyojin was one of the best things to ever happen, and i'm proud to be a part of it.

Now i just want to see jean What if we're all just too hopeful and in reality the helos cosplayer and trapdoor-kun are just normal people. If Annie isn’t coming back I’m rioting honestly. Also where TF is mikasa?!

I LOVE PIECK SO MUCH she is becoming one of my fave characters. Also hopefully nothing happens to cause Reiner’s mental state to become worse than it is right now. CAN’T WAIT FOR NEXT CHAPTER I think the Asian woman is Mikasa. My evidence to support this claim is that after she talked to Willy, she said ‘let’s go’ to her body guards. As if she knows what’s going on.

Seeing Pieck being smart and quick-witted made me like her even more. I'd be very sad if she ends up being killed or if Porco and her never truly meet the original main cast. Give us those warriors/soldiers interactions Isayama.

Annie...please...it has been too long now...

Regarding Eren he ackwonledged that Reiner and co. were just clueless kids trying to save the world when they destroyed the Wall. And he is stating that he as well has been forced in this role. I think he is trying to bring Reiner to his side as well as to remove a Warrior (and Falco) from the stage where things will soon go wild.

This shit was lit lit lit!!! I need war!

If the marley arc was a dubstep song, this chapter was the part where the song builds up in speed and frequency and ends right before it levels off and the beat subsequently drops. Ya feel? Warriors, come out to plaaaaay.

IMO PIECK IS ON EREN'S SIDE AND SHE ACTED IN FRONT OF PORCO

I want to know who works with who (especially ZEKE), how they arrived in Marley, I want the SC but also I really love the Warriors, asdfghjkl I really don't know what to expect but I love the way Isayama keeps us on this subtle line between ""OMG"" and ""WTF MAN"". I want some answers! AND I DEFINITELY WANT ANNIE BACK

I hope Sasha is in Marley too. She needs pizza.

Too few panels of Marco's death. 😠

i miss zeke memes

PATHS

I love the art in the recent chapters. I will forgive slow pacing for good art.

Karina is a bitch

Isayama give Reiner a break or kill him already, end the suffering pls

And lastly, the Rick and Morty copypasta meme made it's way into our poll. I laughed!

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Attack on Titan. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Eren's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Attack on Titan truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Zeke's existential catchphrase "As expected of Pieck 👉😶👉," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Hajime Isayama's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Reiner and Historia tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.

Thank you also to those left nice comments about the poll. We appreciate it!

#snk polls #snk poll #snk chapter 99 #snk poll results

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