#I also wish there was one decided tag for every character typing out all the different little variations feels so redundant

[dermyartsz]

The matriarch of the Maw.

[hwaightme]

GUY.exe

(masterlist) (perma-taglist)

✏️ pairing: yunho x gn!reader ✏️ genre: fluff, crack, friends? to lovers, drawing? to lover ✏️ summary: you never expected for the character you designed for the newest dating simulator to be quite as realistic as this ✏️ wordcount: 5.0k ✏️ warnings/tags: questionable editing, unhinged crack galore, fever dream, digital artist / designer reader, shy boy best friend yunho, lowkey referencing the song the fic is named after (GUY.exe by SUP3RFRUIT) ✏️ taglist: at the bottom of the fic~ ✏️ a/n: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY LOVE MY NADIA @justhere4kpop !!! you are the kindest, funniest, sweetest person ever, i love you so so much and i am so grateful for every day because it means i can spend it with you <3 wishing you the best day, all the most amazing things, experiences, achievements and more!!

Another hour more, and you were going to scream. Hunched over your drawing tablet with bloodshot eyes and a cramping hand, you had been drawing and redrawing what seemed to be the same thing over and over again. But nothing gave you that magical feeling of completion and rightness when the abstract lines and shapes and shadows and doodles all came together on a page to form one whole. What you were experiencing was, in fact, very much the opposite. All because of these damn dumb brown doe eyes that you had decided to give to the character. Of course. What other eyes could the golden retriever type have, right? What other kinds of eyes would your boss approve of for the established archetype, the persona that you had ideated, storyboarded and proposed not only in front of your immediate team but also to senior management? That was right. None. No other. Only these doe eyes that you had been staring at and cursing profusely for the last four hours after having promised yourself that you would try to get to bed at ten in the evening instead of the less-than encouraging past midnight madness. But who were you kidding? 

Setting down the pen, you leaned back to stretch, hearing random joints crack and echo around your body, making you wonder if you have even been moving at all for the past few weeks. Having the opportunity to work from home during fast-paced sprints was, of course, a big benefit, but all too often for you, it also meant only ever walking from your home office to your kitchen and back, with the occasional bathroom break and a flop onto the armchair you had dragged into your office for designated social media scrolling time. Gone from the world, with your friends having nicknamed you an e-hermit in not one, but two separate chats. Zoned out and barely hanging onto the words spewed by your superiors, much like the rest of your fellow designers working on this same project, be it other characters, setting, clothing customisation options, accessories, or special items… as the main project lead, boss of the bosses had said: ‘whatever the user wishes for, should be there’. Who knew that a dating simulator could be that intense and demanding? 

Your drawing tablet was glaring at you, and so were the eyes on its screen, doubled onto your monitor watching your every movement like a painting at a museum would. They were meant to be kind and loving, crafted to complete the sunshine that this character was supposed to be, but the slightest misses in the lines were throwing the image off-kilter, and you could not pinpoint what was wrong. Reaching out for the now lukewarm cup of coffee off to the side of your desk, narrowly avoiding the clutter of sketches and notes you had made, you heaved a sigh, pondering if it would be the wisest to simply resign yourself to abandoning the task for today, and pick it up at work tomorrow. It was not like you would be punished for having the eyes be slightly off during an update meeting, after all, this was an ongoing process. But the perfectionist part of you was not letting go. You had managed to ideally depict everything else - the toned, tall physique with the stunning waist, torso and broad shoulders, the cheeks that made you feel a strong cute aggression, the tousled locks that could then be customised by a player’s colour preference, every other feature of the face that screamed ‘handsome’ and ‘appealing’... you did it all, and you would not be yourself if you could not overcome this little blip.

“One more try…” you whispered to yourself and searched for the file on your computer that contained a user story and profile of the character you had been agonising over. 

One click, another, and the document was up on the screen, revealing an initial concept sketch that you had made when you first proposed the man as a possible love interest for the main character in the simulator, as well as any facts about him, now being even further developed by the story-writers. Page after page, update after update the character in some ways felt more real than you, especially in your current deflated state. A gentleman, a sentimental soul, with what your colleague had called ‘four-dimensional’ traits and overall a funny, adorable sweetheart who at the click of a finger can turn into the sexiest man alive. There was nothing you did not like - aside from some details here and there that you were not sure who added but they had been approved so you had to deal with it, and that was problematic for your work since it meant that you were in the permanent state of wanting to do the character justice. You scrolled back up, starting at the brief, staring at the name as if it wasn’t already imprinted in your mind. Jeong Yunho. 

The dance instructor and choreographer. The talented and hardworking man who the main character would meet third, on her eighth day in Seoul. Born on the twenty-third of March nineteen ninety-nine in the city of Gwangju, moving to Seoul to chase his dreams and fight for them. Special talents… skills… favourite phrases… preferences… key memories… you read on, re-absorbing the details and rearranging them on imaginary shelves, trying to make sense of the information in the context of character design. How were you going to depict all of this in a pair of eyes? A part of you was confident that you were overthinking - actually, you definitely were. Not a single other designer was on Yunho's creation, and developers were going to look at him not as a persona, as a representation of a being that had become real in your mind, but as a task to execute, lines of code to make him move in predetermined ways, make him talks in predetermined ways, smile… yes, you were excited to see him be just that bit more alive, but at the same time, you were afraid of that moment - it would be right then that the world you had subconsciously built for you and him alone would be shattered, and your daydreams dispelled, maybe even crushed. So, getting the eyes perfect right now was the least you could do. At least your Yunho would be perfect.

Swearing under your breath, you picked up the pen once more and twirled it once around your fingers. His personality was fresh on your mind, heart racing, you could almost imagine him in front of you. With a final nod of encouragement, you dived back in, with more vigour and motivation than before, determined to get Yunho right, and to depict him how he truly was, how you knew he should be. The time ticked past, and so did the layers of doubt. Erasing themselves along with strokes of the digital brushes that dissatisfied you, you were unveiling the true character, and with a light heart, a smile on your face and a saved file, leaned onto your desk and rested your head on your crossed arms, just for a quick break to relish in the fact that you finally achieved the look that you had been searching for…

“Hey, good morning you worker bee, what did I tell you about sleeping at your desk?”

You never thought you could yell, right after waking up, as loud as you did at that moment. Jolting up from your seat, forgetting all the papers, equipment and stationery that was strewn about on the table on which you had been dozing, you bolted away from the source of the voice. It had resounded far too close to you for comfort, belonged to no one whom you knew, and was dangerously sweet and slightly lower-set. Pleasant. But who the hell was in your apartment and how did they break in when you almost always double-locked your door? After building up a bit of distance, you finally looked up and rubbed the last bits of sleep from your eyes. The figure was lean, toned, considerably tall, perhaps even very tall, definitely a man, with dark hair and a face that was a bit too similar to-

Jeong Yunho. Jaw-dropping, you darted back to your tablet and computer, practically shaking the mouse, forcing the entire digital system to begrudgingly awaken at your command. You searched everywhere. The open file, others, older versions… nothing. No luck in finding what you had been working on. It was as if the Yunho you had been spending weeks developing had never existed, and all that you were left with and were staring at was a blank page, and the character, no, a whole man, right in front of you, supposedly living, breathing and in your room. You stood up straight, giving the not-quite-a-stranger but still a stranger a once over, while he, confused, had an eyebrow raised and a sheepish smile on his face. He looked adorable that way. Abashed to the point of cuteness - you recalled a game developer on your team describing the planned emotional response functionality in that way; it had been a hit, and now you were seeing, in person, why. 

“Y-Yunho?” you whispered in disbelief, a hand hovering over your mouth while you were wondering whether you should officially report yourself to your boss for having succumbed to the delusions. Relief flashed over the beautiful man’s features when you mentioned his name, timidly, yes, but still, it was his name that you uttered.

“Yes, Y/N, that’s me, hey, don’t worry.”

“Y/N?” He knew your name. This was too real - a shriek erupted from what felt like the depths of your soul, and you shut your eyes, only to open them again and to see the same picture, but a little more zoomed in. He was approaching you. Code red, alert, alert, hot man of your dreams who you had been drawing all the time and were effectively being paid to thirst over was approaching you.

“Do you not remember me or something, are you okay? See I keep telling you to not sleep so late, it’s bad for you-”

“Look who’s talking, mister ‘time to text at two in the morning’,” It was a shot in the dark, a random recollection of facts that had been noted about Yunho, but that was true, since he stopped immediately, a dazzling smile on his face.

“Alright, alright, you got me. But hey, you answer me so we are in this together, right?” he countered, and winked. 

“Yeah… and I should stop drinking coffee that late, it gives me some cursed… abilities…” you concluded cryptically, though Yunho did not seem to care much about the wording, taking it as your account of how easily you had been spooked by him.

After the initial wave of ‘stranger danger’ had subsided, instead being replaced by the odd conviction that the man before you truly was just the representation of the character for the simulator, you crossed your arms and regarded him more slowly, calmly while he approached the book cabinet that was filled to the brim with manga, manhwa, figurines, dolls, action figures… effectively the best representation of what had inspired you and continued to drive you to do what you were doing in your life now. He was dressed casually, in a zip-up grey hoodie and dark grey jeans. He had taken off his shoes and was in black socks that he stuffed into a pair of slippers - so in this reality, Yunho clearly was a regular guest. Scratching the back of your head, you wondered if this was a storyline that had been updated and you were unknowingly hallucinating.

“Well, uh, if you… if you want me to come by another time I don’t mind. Whatever works best for you…”

Oh. It finally clicked in your head, and your heart fluttered. The moment was stark and aching in your mind, and you were barely able to contain yourself, the subconscious fangirl in you fully awakening. The light flush of pink on his cheeks, those damn doe eyes that were so perfect, and were now looking right at you as if you were Yunho’s entire world, it was all a telltale sign for what was to happen later, and the past disappointment at having been woken up and having no more documents to present evaporated. This was another life, it had to be. One where you did not have to worry about the endless story points, bi-weekly sprints and one deliverable after another. Only a very precious Yunho who, while toying with the sleeve of his hoodie was pondering if he was even welcome.

“Hey! No, we were planning to hang out and we are going to. Sorry, you know how work is and it got to me this time. What shall we do then? Go out, stay in?” you amplified your sociability, putting the fantastical aspect of the circumstances on the back burner for future pondering.

Laying down the pen that you had absent-mindedly grabbed for self-defence, you stepped around the desk and towards Yunho, never once breaking the visual exchange, except when his gaze darted to the floor under your intensity. You had the advantage after all, of knowledge. You could sense, and could confirm by your universe, what exactly was going to happen. He was pretending to not be affected by your closeness, looking at the cabinet again, though the tone in which he spoke was vulnerable, every bit the dream guy you were imagining all this time. You could barely resist the urge to pinch his cheek - in fact, you made a mental note to yourself to check if that was a playable option in the game or not.

“Can we… stay in?”

“Take out?” if there was something you would not quite let him do, it would be to give him full power over the kitchen. Perhaps another time, but not when the dream was so magnificent.

“You bet! I’m buying this time-”

“Yun, c’mon.”

“Technically I am still the guest.”

“You are much more than a guest-” a pause, a blur within which Yunho was attempting to pick out the meaning behind the words which you had purposefully left to be ambiguous, just to mess with him a little bit. It was too sweet, “I mean, you practically live here at this point,” he groaned and playfully rolled his eyes while continuing to tap in the order to what was for sure meant to be your favourite restaurant in the neighbourhood.

You followed him into your living room. Everything was just as you had left it. Even Yunho’s presence was beginning to feel natural, probably because it had already been pretty much just as constant as him now physically falling onto the couch and leaning back to stretch an arm out over the back of it. Hell, you had even spent some evenings sketching him in this same room. As you settled beside him, while still keeping a little bit of distance - just as friends who were feeling not quite platonic would do, you realised that indeed, you were that close. You did know him ‘since forever’, and whatever this fever dream was, you had every right to enjoy it. So upon pulling your legs onto the couch and under you, you settled in and with a soft sigh began to set up the movie you were going to watch. Just like you and Yunho would do had he been an actual interest of yours.

As the food arrived and was promptly devoured, and you were midway through the film, you found Yunho slowly but surely gravitating towards you. First, it was with an outstretched hand when he was trying to imitate a character on the screen, then with him sitting ever so slightly closer when there was supposedly a ‘spooky moment’ even though you knew full well that out of the two of you, you were the one who would not dare enter a haunted house again, and finally, under the pretence of ‘wanting to show you a funny meme on his phone’ he sat right next to you, thighs flush against each other, arm resting on the sofa right behind your head. You could not help but lean into the warmth, attracted to it, comforted. You knew Yunho inside and out, and if there was anyone who you would trust like this, it would be him. He had seen you at your worst - crying in the office bathrooms when during your early days at the company you had been humiliated by your old boss (who, thankfully, had been promptly fired), and had seen you at your best - your award-winning presentation and proof of concept for an innovative life simulation game, selected as a showpiece for the company at a major global conference. He was always there. Be it on your phone, in a sketchbook, or on your laptop - he was always there, cheering you on. There was no difference between then and now, except that now you could allow your head to rest against his broad chest, hearing the soothing beating of his heart behind the cotton fabrics, feeling how his hand dropped to trace random, intricate shapes on your shoulder while his eyes stayed glued to the television screen. 

You could sense that he was afraid to look at you, or at least of what he would think or do if he were to do so. He was warm. Very warm. Maybe too warm. You looked up, noting the adorable redness of his ears that appeared only in particular instances: either he just woke up from deep sleep which was not the case, or he had violently shaken his head and rubbed his ears - another no, or he was embarrassed and shy. Bingo. There it was. You nuzzled against him and swore you could feel his entire body stiffen. Just like when a cat makes a person ‘ the chosen one’ by lying on their lap and said person almost forgets to breathe, you nearly knocked consciousness out of Yunho, it seemed.

“What’s up?” you mumbled, noting that Yunho straightened his back, sitting in an unnatural position.

“I, uh, nothing, it’s nothing,” he responded, clearing his throat, still not daring to look to the side to face you. 

A pause. That was his character - you nodded to yourself. He had always been like this. Sympathy through the roof but when it came to his openness - he far from often strayed into that field. It would take quite a bit of coaxing, or, somehow easier, waiting for the right moment. So wait you did, comfortably resting against Yunho, insistent that he return to his previously unwinded state. Before you could snake your hand around him to pull his hood up, your friend suddenly shot up, mumbling something about it being too stuffy, or too hot, and tugged the article of clothing off.

All would be fine and dandy if he was not built how he was - and you knew it better than anyone, however strange it was to admit. After all, you had been the one to pick and sketch out his physique, knowing every muscle, curve and edge. As he fumbled with the sleeves, you took in his form, mouth agape as you saw what you had only perceived two-dimensionally, now in live action, and somehow being the one case of where the transition was impeccable if not better. If he were to turn at any moment, he would bear witness to your disturbingly dedicated scrutiny. But at the same time, what could a digital artist and designer do when a handsome man was right before them? Exactly. It was practically a duty to perceive; if not for personal interests (which you would be a liar if you were to say you did not have them), then at least for science. He looked too good in the dark grey graphic t-shirt, which, despite it being slightly oversize, did its beautiful work by revealing his perfectly toned arms. When you noticed him being in the process of turning back, you peeled your gaze away and back to the movie, not sure where in the storyline you even were, nor what the actors were saying. Patting the space next to you, you beckoned Yunho back. This time, he was calmer in his demeanour, falling back and letting you fall into him, with him, for him - and he was right there to catch you. 

Action scene after action scene turned into a blur, dialogue was static that you were not bothered to discern while you focused on Yunho’s breathing. Shallower than before, but still comforting. Who would have thought that you would be cuddling with your dream man when a mere few hours ago you were holed up behind your desk, with a cramped and stiff neck, an exhausted hand and equally tired eyes? Eyelids grew heavier, and you wondered if it would be long before you would fall asleep again, and wake up alone, as usual; a bitter smile settled on your lips when the realisation hit you, earning you a perplexed glance from Yunho and a poke in your side.

“What are you thinking about?”

“Oh, nothing.”

“Definitely something, he turned to you, studying your every movement. The action led him to detangle himself from you, leading you to shiver a little from the lack of his body heat, “ah wait are you cold now? I- wait, here, hoodie?”

“Thanks.”

Him. In every thread. The scent of clean laundry, cotton, and fabric softener. There was something so magical in it, soothing. You wanted to float in the aroma and this moment forever. Pulling the hoodie tighter around you, you pretended to not notice the adoration that was blatantly obvious in Yunho’s expression. He watched as you pushed up the sleeves a little bit, crossed your legs and looked back at him.  Your friend, your muse and subject was nervous, and it did not need a trained professional to figure it out. The tale was climbing to a peak, and the main characters had to face it together. You waited for him, mellowness across your features as you played with one of the hoodie’s drawstrings.

Yunho looked at you, and something about the purity, and hopefulness within him made you think of the very first drawings you had made on post-its in the middle of a conference. Bored out of your mind, your mind wandered back to pondering the new project you had been assigned - the dating simulator. Idea after idea had been proposed for the characters, but not a single one stuck. Everyone was at a standstill until he came along. A breathtaking blessing, just like he was now. Silence settled like snow, only to be broken by a short hum, and Yunho taking the risk you had been wishing for.

“I… I know it has only been a few months but… I really don’t think I can be friends with you anymore, Y/N,” you tilted your head as he put his hands on his lap, fingers repeatedly messing with the material of his sweatpants - his attempt to soothe himself. You, on the other hand, were oddly calm. Simply waiting for the events to unfold and for you to embrace them with the fullest heart. While he was searching for the right words to say, you placed a hand over his, waking him from rumination. A weak smile was replaced by determination, truth spilling from his soul.

“I like you too much. Really. I would not be able to keep my distance even if I tried.”

“Well I think you are a bit too far away right now, Yun,” with a wave of boldness having washed over you, you acted on instinct, leaning towards the beautiful, infinitely precious man until he could not look away, captivated by your proximity, your glimmering eyes, your acceptance.

“Huh?” the sound was barely audible, an echo lost to the tension. You ran a finger over his jawline, instantly seeing his expression darken with another reverberating, deep sensation.

“We should seal the deal, shouldn’t we?” remaining cryptic, you inched closer and closer until you could pick apart the flicks of lighter mahogany in those stunning irises - you wanted to shake your hand for having persevered to finish them in the drawing. Truly, one of a kind.

“What-”

“Oh just kiss me already-”

That phrase you did not need to tell Yunho twice. Finally catching on, he was the first to destroy the distance between you, capturing your lips with his and letting his hand find purchase in your hair, digits running through it, caressing you, guiding you into a shared rhythm. He was as sweet as vanilla with a hint of cinnamon. An intoxicating, ecstatically overwhelming daze that consumed you whole. You saw the sketches flash before you, burning one by one to fuel the desire building for Yunho, for you, for the two of you together. It felt right, it felt real. Arms over his shoulders, you allowed him to pull you into his lap, embrace you and pepper the softest kisses on your cheeks, and your neck, finding the path back to your lips. You felt more alive than ever with the electricity coursing through your newfound intimacy. Nothing existed. This universe was Yunho, and you could not be happier. Better than in any story that you or your co-workers could develop, better than in any fairytale, the oddity transformed into eternity. This was a dream you wanted to remain in for as long as you-

Saying it was hard to wake up was an understatement. Your entire body had been aching from having fallen asleep in an awkward position over your drawing tablet, you had slept past your alarms and as such had only fifteen minutes to cram getting ready and leaving for the office, and upon checking your schedule you had the ‘pleasure’ of having three more meetings being crammed into it, reducing your lunch break to what was a near null. With a sigh, you moved away from your space, dragging your tired body to your first official interaction of the day after having sat at your desk for a couple of hours, already dreading it. The new CEO - whoever they were, was the ‘I want to know all the details and be one with the teams’ type, how joyful, you wondered how long that would last. 

It was hard to find the motivation, especially after a dream such as yours. It kept on revolving in your head, pressing down on you, making you reminisce the gentle caresses, the sweet words and actions, the delightful kiss that you had managed to just have the time to experience with Yunho. You were seeing your character in an entirely new light, already having reworked some ideas for the possible special event outfits and spammed your close colleagues who were working on the storyline with some ideas about how Yunho could have even better depth and as such, engagement from prospective users. Perhaps for this meeting with authority you just needed to tap into your delusions and it would be good enough - at least they were productive for once. 

While you were setting up the presentation, the rest of your immediate team began to file in, giving you excited waves that you returned with an unprecedented warmth. Pleasant chatter, discussion of possibility, mention of just how special it was that this dating simulator game project was the one the CEO had chosen to see today… you were feeling confident. Whoever this person was going to be, you were going to give your best and-

The door opened. Heads turned. Greetings, bows - all forms of politeness that could be expressed being delivered. People standing up, while you stood up taller by the board, the title slide behind you. You raised your head, only for time to slow down and freeze entirely. Your hold on the clicker tightened, and the only person aside from you who existed at that moment was the newcomer. The CEO. Greeting others with a smile and with equally as elegant bows. Every bit the gentleman in his tailored suit, hair swept back and impeccably styled. Jeong Yunho.

This had to be some kind of joke, right? Was this a dream? The stinging remaining after you pinched your arm slapped you back into reality. No. This Yunho was definitely real. But who was the one you-... the one you started dating? The one who you were way more than colleagues or friends with? Before your mind could accelerate into panicked rumination, his gaze stopped at you, and you could sense everyone else’s attention drift to you too. You were under his spotlight. Melting under what was nothing but kindness in his eyes.

“L/N Y/N, right? I heard a lot about you,” his grin was making you dizzy, memories of his taste resurfacing and sending heat to your cheeks, giving them a light dusting of pink.

“Good things, I hope?” you managed, he chuckled, and sent you a wink before sitting down on his chair.

“The best. I am really looking forward to this,” a playful tease.

“Glad to know this.”

“I heard you made quite a few new developments, how did that happen?” you knew what he was getting at, and that made you feel secure. So it was the same Yunho. That precious Yunho who had confessed to you, the one who had come to life and was now part of yours, by some odd twist of fate had appeared in your company, and was now right in front of you, eager and in love. You smirked while twisting to check the slide one last time, well aware that his only focus ever would be you.

“Came to me in a dream.”

✏️ perma-taglist: @acciocriativity @/justhere4kpop @byuntrash101 @shakalakaboomboo @starillusion13 @hongthoven @cqndiedcherries @uwuheeseungie @cheollipop @frankenstein852 @charreddonuts @miriamxsworld @mingigoo @michel-angelhoe @innsomniacshinestar @foxinnie8 @preciouswoozi @wooyoungjpg @nebulousbookshelf @wowie-hockey @hongjoongs-patience @ssaboala @jaehunnyy @kitten4sannie @maddkitt @cromerteez @lightinyreads @ren-junwrld @burnmepls @pyeonghongrie-main @archivesummer @little-angel-k @marsstarxhwa

thank you for reading! if you enjoyed, please leave a kind reblog, much love!

[tmnt-tychou]

What is Ninja Turtles: Brotherhood?

Brotherhood came into conception February 2023 when we started to see more of the Mutant Mayhem movie set to release later in August. While I don't mind the franchise skewing young--I myself first saw Ninja Turtles as a child-- I found myself wishing there was also some TMNT animated content for older fans. At the time I was watching DC animated series like Young Justice and Harley Quinn. It was nice they recognized that there were fans of all ages and they were putting out animated content for older audiences while also making content for kids. I found myself wishing that TMNT would follow that example. And then I asked myself, if I had the opportunity to make a TMNT animated series for older fans, what would it be about? At first, I had nothing and wasn't intending to explore the idea further. Then, one day, I was driving home from work and I suddenly had an idea.

For most of 2023 I explored the concept. Since animation is my background, that was the medium I had in mind when putting it together. Of course, there's no way I could animate a whole series by myself as a fan project. I first thought about maybe trying animatics, but that also seemed a bit overwhelming. For a time, I thought maybe I would let it go as it seemed too big of a project for one person. But then the 40th anniversary came around and I decided I wanted to do it for them. For a lifetime of turtles. So I decided on a web toons type format. It seemed easier as a one-person project than the typical comic book format. So here I am after a year of development, attempting my best at putting out a TMNT fan comic for the anniversary. It's meant as a love letter to both the franchise as a whole and the fans. It pulls from many different iterations while also telling its own story. As such, it's meant for not just fans of one iteration, but for fans of any of the iterations. Just Ninja Turtle fans in general. And I'm aiming to provide a full character arc for each turtle so, no matter who's your favorite, you'll get some good content.

Plot: The series takes place five years after the defeat of the Shredder. In a story meant for older fans, I decided the turtles should be older, too. No longer teenagers, they are now 25. The idea is that everything that you expect to see in a typical TMNT series has already happened to them, and now they are navigating their world and experiencing new adventures as adults, trying to find meaning after their main adversary is gone.

You can find development art I've done over the year by checking out the #ntbrotherhood tag. I post new parts every Monday. And I usually post here on Tumblr unless I feel they are too big. You can find the full comic collected on Webtoons (for as long as they'll put up with hosting a fan comic.)

The Boys:

[intoanotherworld23]

Pick Your Battles XII

Pairing: Reader x Bradley Bradshaw

Warnings: None

Summary: Bradley broke your heart when he accused you of betraying him, and you haven’t seen or spoken to him since. Until you are both called back to Top Gun to help with a dangerous mission that nobody’s ever attempted before

I do not own any rights to the characters or movie this is just purely for reading entertainment. Hearts, reblogs, and comments are encouraged and appreciated! If you wish to be added to the tag list please let me know! Thank you so much guys and enjoy! XOXO

Part 11

Check out my other works on my Hall Of Hunks

The next day literally dragged on for what felt like days. Both Jake and Bradley constantly looking over at you, but neither one of them saying a word. Of course you didn’t give neither of them so much as a smile.

It wasn’t a good day of training either. Nobody was communicating with each other, and they weren’t acting like a team. Maverick and Admiral Simpson were both disappointed and frustrated. The mission was only a couple weeks away, and everyone still wasn’t learning.

Admiral Simpson was also getting on you about choosing a team leader for this mission. He suggested Jake, but you argued that he would get his entire team killed if he led the mission. It was like you were stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Today though you were completely distracted, and your head was in the clouds. Right now you couldn’t think or make any type of decision. You felt like you needed to escape from here.

Ever since that night going on your somewhat date with Jake, and running into Bradley. Only to hear the truth, and both men wanting you to choose them. It was hard and that’s why you decided to go home alone. Bradley being kind enough to drive you home.

You didn’t kiss you didn’t hug. You just said your goodbyes, and laid in bed until it was time to get up. Mind going crazy over everything that’s been happening, and wondering what you should do.

Standing next to Maverick as you watched the pilots strolling in to take their seats. Pete asking you if you were okay, and of course you lied not wanting to burn his ears off with everything that’s been going on.

Admiral Simpson and Solomon walked in with Simpson taking a seat in the back, and Solomon walking up to the podium with a stoic look on his face.

“Good morning pilots.” Warlock greeted everyone. “The mission will be operational earlier than expected. The new shipment will be delivered within about ten days time. As a result your mission has been moved up one week.”

Everyone including Maverick looked nervous hearing this news. It was unexpected and quite honestly terrified the pilots.

“But sir nobody has successfully flown a low level course.” Coyote spoke.

“You’ve been ordered to move on.” He responded complete silence filling the room.

Looking across the room you saw that Bradley was already staring at you. You could tell by the look on his face that he was worried. Instinctively you cracked a smile for him in reassurance. He mimicked you as you turned away to look back at Warlock.

“Captain.” He signaled to Maverick who now stood in his place placing his hands on the podium.

“We have one week left to focus on the most dangerous part of the mission. It’s a pop up strike with a steep dive requiring nothing less than two miracles.” A heavy sigh leaving your lips. “We need to focus on this mission, and you need to listen to every instruction that is given to you.”

Maverick looked to you to speak now making you step forward clearing your throat. Your mouth so dry it was like the Sahara desert.

“Two pairs of F-18s will fly in a welded wing formation.” All eyes now focused on you. “Team work. Precise coordination of these aircraft are essential to this missions success and your survival.”

“As you have read this plant rests between two mountains.” Pointing to the screen behind you showing a simulation of what it’s going to look like. “On the final approach you’ll invert directly into a steep dive. This allows you to maintain the lowest possible altitude, and the only possible attack angle.”

Looking at the pilots expression you could see them all twitching and fidgeting in their seats. They tried to put on brave faces, but you saw the fear behind their eyes.

“Your target is an impact point less than three meters wide. The two seat aircraft will paint the target with a laser bulls eyes. The first pair will breach the reactor by dropping a laser guided bomb on an exposed ventilation hatch. This will create an opening for the second pair.”

“That’s miracle number one.” Maverick interrupted before you could say anything more.

Some shook their heads in disbelief, and others looked around at the other pilots making sure they heard all this correctly. It sounded easier than it was going to be.

“The second team will deliver a kill shot and destroy the target.” You finished as Bradley gave you a encouraging smile.

“That’s miracle number two.” Maverick raised two fingers this time. “If either team misses the target.”

Looking over at Maverick who had a very serious expression.

“The mission is a failure.” Bowing your head down to the thought of them failing or losing their lives because of this mission.

“The mountain is a very steep high- G climb out to avoid hitting this mountain.”

“A steep climb at that speed your pulling at least 8 G’s.” Jake spoke up saying what everyone else was thinking.

“9 minimum.” Maverick responded.

“Has anyone actually ever achieved that?” Jake sounded skeptical.

“I did.” Maverick sounded proud of his achievement.

You remember that day very clearly too. Maverick pushed 10 G’s, and pissed off almost every Admiral that was watching. Laughing to yourself as the cursed mutters in the room, while some of them were chuckling at Mavericks bold action.

“To survive this mission you will pull beyond that. Even if it means bending your air frame.”

Looking over to see Admiral Simpson closing his eyes, and shaking his head at Mavericks words. You knew Simpson wanted this mission to be as clean as possible, but with Mavericks reputation you knew he’d tell them to push their limits.

“You’ll be pulling so hard you’ll weigh close to two thousand pounds. Your skull crushing your spine. Your lungs imploding like an elephant is sitting on your chest. Fighting with everything you have just to keep from blacking out.”

You could feel a lump forming in your throat at the thought of Bradley struggling in the jet. Imaging the worst case scenario. The last thing you would want is for that to happen to him, and Bradley loses control and crashes.

“And this is where you’ll be at your most vulnerable. This is what we’re calling coffin corner.” Bob looked like he was either going to throw up or pass out.

“Assuming you avoid crashing into this mountain you’ll climb straight up into enemy radar while losing all of your air speed.” Everyone now focused on the screen as they showed another video demonstration.

“Within seconds you will be fired upon by enemy SAM’s.” Those were powerful missiles and everyone else knew that too.

This was a mission that couldn’t go wrong. They don’t want to fail, but they also didn’t want to lose any pilots. That’s why they wanted the best of the best. Pilots that they felt could achieve this and survive.

“This is gonna take you and your aircraft to its breaking point.” Mavericks tone was almost like a warning.

“Sir is this even possible?” Natasha spoke up this time.

“The answer to that will be up to the pilot in the box.”

Maverick was speaking to everyone, but his words were meant more for Bradley. The pair stared at each other for a few seconds like they were having some sort of silent conversation. Maverick didn’t want to lose Bradley either, and wanted him to know how serious this was.

“We have created a flight path just like the one for the mission. You will learn this path, you will think about this path even in your sleep.” You said as confidently as you could. “First pair will be Coyote as lead pilot, and Phoenix and Bob second.”

The three pilots nodded as they were dismissed by Maverick. Watching as they were escorted to where they needed to go.

Everyone else left the room to listen in on what was going on. Jake tried to remain in the room as long as he could, but when he saw that Bradley wasn’t moving he gave up, and headed towards the door. Bradley remained in his seat as you stood there, and waited until the room was empty.

Nothing was said between the two of you. Picking at the skin around your nails out of habit. While Bradley just watched you curiously like he wanted you to speak first. Both of you had so much to say, but didn’t know where to start.

“How are you?” Bradley asked as he stood up.

“As good as one can be.” Giving him a pathetic smile. “You?”

Not realizing that the two of you were each stepping towards the other closer and closer. Like some type of magnetic force was pulling you to him.

“As good as one can be.” Repeating your words making you smile.

“How you feeling after that little speech?” Crossing your arms across your chest as you two now stood practically in front of the other.

“Nervous as hell.” Answering honestly as he wiped the palms of his hands against his pants. “Do you think we can honestly pull this off?”

“Yeah I think with the right pilots we can.” Bradley actually valued your opinion on certain things.

“Who do you think should be leading this mission?” It was a question you were hoping to avoid with him.

“Bradley come on.” Scoffing as you turned away from him.

“No seriously I want to hear who you think should be leading this mission.” Softly grabbing your hand so you looked back at him.

“Honestly.” Taking a deep breath before you answered. “None of you.”

That answer seemed to shock Bradley as he didn’t say anything and just looked at your face. It was the honest truth, and quite frankly you didn’t want him leading the mission anyway. He meant too much for you to lose.

“None of you are really ready for this mission, and they need someone who can lead it successfully.” Shrugging your shoulders at him as you further explained.

“You’re right.” Finally speaking. “You’re totally right.”

“It’s not that I don’t think you can’t do it.”

“I know what you mean. It’s what you and Maverick have been telling me from the start.” Hearing him mention Mavericks name surprised given how he felt about him. “I can’t play it safe.”

“You’re a good pilot Bradley.” Placing a hand on his shoulder as he weakly smiled.

“So are you.” Taking your hand from his shoulder and holding it in his hand his thumb tenderly rubbing the skin back and forth.

Bradley’s gaze lingering on your face as you both smiled at each other with adoration. Neither one of you doing or saying anything, but just enjoying each others presence. It was like a roller coaster with you two. Constant ups and downs, and you didn’t know when it was going to end.

“We should probably be there with everyone else.” You spoke up as you dropped your hand from his.

“Yeah right.” He stuttered as you walked in front of him Bradley placing a soft touch on your back as he followed right behind you.

Once you got into the room everyone looked stressed and terrified. Some of them had their head in their hands, and others mouths open wide. You and Bradley looked at each other confused to what was going on. Whatever happened it wasn’t good.

“Where the hell have you guys been?” Payback exclaimed everyone turning towards you both. “You guys just missed it.”

“What happened?” Asking as you walked away from Bradley.

“Coyote went into G lock and Phoenix and Bob crashed.” It was like the air left your lungs and all you heard was crash.

“What?” Bradley shouted in disbelief.

You could hear muffled voices but you had no idea what they were saying. There was a ringing in your ear as you stood there like a deer caught in the headlights.

Staring at him wide eyed saying nothing your legs moved before your mouth could say anything. Running out of the room as quickly as you could before you burst into tears. Those same feelings and fear were coming back, and you couldn’t handle something like this happening to you again.

Running into an empty room as you sat down trying to catch your breath. Your breathing was shallow and erratic, and you felt that same anxiety before you had a panic attack. The room was getting smaller, and it was getting much harder to breathe. Like at any moment you could burst into tears.

Bradley quickly followed behind you hearing you as he ran down the hall, and quickly came into the room. The sight before him nearly broke his heart.

He took one look at you, and sat right next to you. An arm wrapped around you while he held your hands. Leaning your head against his shoulder as he tried to help control you. Whispering comforting things in your ear.

“It’s okay just breathe in through your nose, and out of your mouth.” His chin resting on top of your head. “Breathe with me baby.”

Trying to get you to follow his breathing patterns in a slow and easy pace. Hoping that his calm presence would help, and would make you feel better. He hated to see you like this, and wishes he could take all this pain you felt away from you.

“That’s it. Just breathe like that for me.” He whispered once he felt your breathing slowing down. “That’s a good girl.”

Closing your eyes as you suddenly felt exhausted. Pressing yourself deeper into Bradley’s body loving how warm and safe he felt. Bradley wasn’t going to let you go either. He wanted to hold you in his arms for as long as he could.

“Better?” He asked looking at your face.

“Yeah. Thank you.” Weakly smiling at him as you pressed your face into his shoulder. “It’s been so long since that’s happened.”

“I understand.”

The doors came bursting open as a worried Maverick came into the room. Looking at the way Bradley was holding you and seeing the expression you had on your face he knew what happened.

“Are they okay?” Bradley asked.

“There gonna keep them both in the hospital over night for observation. But there gonna be okay.” A sigh of relief left your lips hearing that news.

“That’s good.” He responded not moving an inch.

“It was a close one.” Mavericks voice cracking at the thought of how much worse it could’ve been.

“I’ve never lost a wingman.”

“You’re lucky. Fly long enough and it’ll happen. There will be others.”

“Easy for you to say.” Bradley letting go of you to stand up now. “No wife. No kids. Nobody to mourn you when you burn in.”

“Bradley.” Whispering for him to stop knowing this wasn’t the time or place.

“Go home.” Maverick responded not really in the mood to have this discussion. “Just get some sleep.”

“Why did you pull my papers at the academy?” Bradley asked Maverick before he could walk out the door. “Why did you stand in my way?”

“You weren’t ready.” Maverick kept his voice low and soft.

“Ready for what? To fly like you.” Bradley was raising his voice as he stood face to face with Maverick now.

“No ready to forget the books and trust your instincts. Don’t think just do. You think up there your dead. Believe me.”

“Well my dad believed in you.” Bradley said with such malice it even shocked you. “I’m not gonna make the same mistake.”

As the two of them stared at each other you could tell Maverick was affected by his words. Standing up this time as you wanted to say something, but it was between the two of them. They needed to be work this out themselves.

Before anything else could be spoke the door opened, and Admiral Solomon and Simpson were standing there with weird looks on their faces. Thinking they were there to lecture Maverick, but there focus was on you.

“Y/N.” Warlock waving you over both Maverick and Bradley watching you.

“What is it?” Asking when they shut the door behind you.

“Your fathers gone.”

[runnning-outof-time]

Birmingham | Tommy Shelby x Reader (Part 16)

Previous Part

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x reader

Summary: Some of (Y/N)'s past comes to light during the drive to Sheffield. She’s finally able to speak to her brother, and have the upperhand for once…until things change on a dime. Thankfully Tommy's there to back her up. After everything goes down, her mum is the first thing she can think about.

Warnings: language, strained familiar relationship, psychological abuse, weapons, violence (typical to series), character death, mentions of drinking

Word Count: 3151

A/N: alright, y’all…here’s the chapter. It’s all going down here. I hope that it doesn’t disappoint given this type of material isn’t what I normally write. A big shoutout is in order for @peakyscillian , who helped me with the structure for a part of this chapter. Also bonus points if you can pick out the line of Garrett’s where I channeled Fitzgerald from The Revanent. Enjoy ! :)

PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!

Comment/Message me if you’d like to be tagged!

(Y/N) kept her hands twisted tightly together in her lap as she stared out at the road ahead of her. With each second that passed, her grip got stronger. It was to the point where her fingernails were digging into her skin, but she didn't care. She needed some way to alleviate this nervous feeling that was bubbling up inside of her.

"Are you ok, (Y/N)?" she heard Tommy ask beside her. His voice made her look over at him to see that he was taking quick glances in her direction in between staying focused on the road. He must've seen the death grip she had on herself.

"Honestly...no," she answered, exhaling a long breath then. "I...my mind's not stopped since we've left Birmingham."

"What's going through it?" he asked, glancing in her direction once more.

"I can't stop thinking about what we're going to do. It's not quite the homecoming that anyone first thinks of," she responded, a bit of a nervous laugh bubbling past her lips after she finished speaking.

"(Y/N), if you're having doubts about being the one who..."

"No. It's not doubt about that," she abruptly cut him off the second she realized the direction his statement was heading in, "I'm the one who's going to do this. I need to...for my own sanity and for the hope that I can gain some peace moving forward. I will go about every day in a much calmer state of mind once I know he's no longer a threat to my mother or I."

Tommy slowed the car down and pulled over to the side of the road after noticing the shift in her voice as it faded out towards the end of her statement. He knew that her past with her family was complicated, but the extent of it had never been shared with him. Seeing her sink further into herself the closer they got to Sheffield made him realize that maybe now was the time to get the full extent of the story.

"Why're we stoppin'?!" Arthur called from the car behind Tommy's.

"Just stay in the car!" Tommy called back to him, killing the engine before he turned to look at (Y/N).

"What did we stop for?" (Y/N) asked a similar question to Arthur's.

"You seemed to be getting worse the closer we got to Sheffield," he told her his observation, "figured that maybe you'd need a moment."

(Y/N) was biting back her tears at this point. "I've taken one, so let's go, yeah?" her statement came out a little more forced than she'd hoped.

"Let's take another," he went against her wishes before continuing, "you said that you'd have a calmer state of mind once he's dealt with...what do you mean by that?" he decided to come right out with his curiosity, hoping that she'd trust him enough to share with him.

(Y/N) looked at Tommy for a few moments, deciding whether or not she wanted to open up and explain her past to him. Then she remembered him opening up to her about his past and what he was going through when they were at the Garrison. With a deep breath and a long sigh, she decided that he was someone she could confide in.

"As much as I hate to say it, I have not a good memory shared with either of my brothers," she started, seeing Tommy's eyebrows furrow together before she continued, "when my father took charge of the gang, he began to push the idea that a woman's place was outside the sphere of business. He brought my brothers up on that idea, so naturally they fell right into place with enforcing it. My mother...she was fine with it. It followed right in line with the Weller family's idea that a woman couldn't be the head of the gang, which was why my father took charge in the first place. But my brothers...they took it a step too far most times. They'd often take the psychological route..." she trailed off then, her voice giving out as different instances of her brothers making her feel inferior began to come to mind.

"Love, you don't need to..."

"No, I need to," she abruptly cut Tommy off, shaking her head as she squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, "maybe speaking about it will help alleviate the burden they've placed on me."

"Only if you feel comfortable," he told her, and she nodded her head before taking a deep breath.

She continued once she'd let it out slowly, "when I was younger it was the typical boys vs. girls, kid typed things. They'd tell me that I couldn't play with them, or that I couldn't be a part of the things they were doing. Clay pretty much stayed in that realm as he got older too; he'd tell me the same thing our father had instilled into our minds: a woman's place wasn't in business and that I had no need to be trying to insert myself into situations where I wasn't welcome. Garrett, on the other hand...he never knew how far was too far. He'd take every chance he got to put me down; to tell me that I wasn't good enough or that I couldn't handle anything. He liked to remind me that, because I was a woman, I was essentially useless to the family as a whole; that I'd never do anything for it like they did. He'd call me weak, he'd call me a coward...he would criticize me for staying inside and then tell me that I was making myself an easy target when I would go out. These remarks would get woven into almost every conversation we shared together, and it came up so much that I just got used to it," she paused, softly laughing to herself before continuing, "as terrible as it sounds, it was nice when he went off to war...because then I only had Clay to deal with, and he had other things going on, so letting me know my place in the family wasn't high up on his list."

"But then Garrett came back..." Tommy filled in the next part of her story when she took a moment to collect herself.

"He did. He came back even worse than he was before. His actions and ideas escalated, to the point where I had to run away," she took a shaky breath as her mind went back to the final days that she'd spent with her family. After a moment spent composing herself, she continued, "he and Clay were trying to make a deal stick...they thought they had the man to where he was going to agree, but he just wouldn't. So Garrett came up with the idea that he'd throw me in the deal as a sweetener, and after persistence from his end, the man bought it. I was to go with this man I'd never met because my brother decided that I was nothing more than a pawn to use in their business endeavors. I made it as far as the man's driveway before he had second thoughts and drove me back...he said he'd work things out on other terms. But Garrett wasn't happy about it. He thought that I was the one who made the man change his mind. He said that he would kill me if the business deal didn't go through in the end, because I would be the only reason why it wouldn’t...I left that night because I didn't want to wait around and see it through."

By the end of her monologue, (Y/N) had noticed that she now had crescent shaped marks in her wrist as a result of how hard she was pressing her fingers into it. She sniffled and reached up to swipe away the tears that were welling up in her eyes before they could escape.

"I'm sorry, I...I didn't mean to unload all of that onto you," she apologized, finally looking at Tommy again.

"Don't apologize. I'm sure doing it helped you," he brushed her off, hoping that his expression was being received as sympathetic. Inside an anger was boiling up with each second that passed. He now had another reason why this man needed to be dealt with before the sun set.

"It did," she nodded, "it's just that now my mum's in his crosshairs because she's still speaking with me, and I won't have her become even more collateral damage from my decisions. That's why I need to be the one who does this...who finally frees us from his grips."

"You're sure of it?" he checked with her once more, still not wanting to push her into something that may be too much...and if he was being honest, he wanted to do it himself now.

"I am," she answered, an assured expression on her face.

"Ok," he nodded upon hearing her answer, "are you ready to go?"

"I am," she repeated her previous response, nodding slightly as she spoke.

Tommy only nodded before he started the engine again, waving his hand out the window to get the attention of his brothers before he maneuvered the car back onto the road. (Y/N) took a deep breath as they began driving again, feeling better after getting things off of her chest. She was still slightly nervous about what was going to be done in a matter of hours, but she felt even more assured that this was the right thing to do.

——

The car was parked down the lane from the pub that Garrett frequented. Tommy had decided that they would walk up so that things wouldn't be even more out of the ordinary. Arthur and John took the other men accompanying them to where they knew Clay would be at this time. They would all make sure that Clay and his associates would stay where they were while things played out.

"You ok?" Tommy asked (Y/N) as they approached the pub.

"I am," she nodded, taking another breath to calm the nerves that were bubbling up.

"And you have what you need?" he checked, referring to the revolver he'd given her before they left Small Heath.

"I do," she answered, her hand subconsciously going to where the weapon was situated in the waistband of her skirt, underneath the flowing part of her blouse.

"Ok," Tommy nodded, stopping and turning to look at her once they were a few steps from the pub's doors. "You can do this," he assured her one last time, his words making her nod, "and I'll be in the corner of the room if things don't go as planned."

(Y/N) nodded one last time and sent him a nervous smile before she turned and walked the few steps separating her from the doors. After another deep breath, she opened them and entered the pub.

The pub was basically empty. There were a few men scattered around the decently-sized room, drinking and minding their business. (Y/N)'s eyes fell on Garrett rather quickly. He was sitting in a stool straight in front of her with his back to the door. She could have easily done the job...just pulled out the gun and taken care of him without even being five steps into the establishment. But she didn't want it to go down like that. She wanted to speak her mind to him first.

So she confidently walked up to the bar, her shoes soundly loudly off the hardwood. She could hear Tommy enter the pub behind her and from the corner of her eye watched as he took a seat at an empty table next to the doors.

Without a word, she stopped at the bar and set her hands down on it. Instead of looking at him, she kept her eyes focused straight ahead. He'd recognize her soon enough.

Within seconds, he did. "It's awful bold of you to set foot in this city after all you've done," there was a smirk apparent in his voice...there always was.

"After all I've done?" (Y/N) countered, making sure that her voice was steady, "I just came to visit mum, Garrett. It was you and Clay who..." her steadiness cracked as she recalled that fateful day. Garrett noticed this and looked to capitalize on it, but she didn't give him the chance as she composed herself and kept speaking, "this is as much my city as it is yours, and you know that," she finished off with a glare.

Garrett chuckled at her comment, unbothered by her steely gaze. "Everyone clear out!" he called to the other patrons in the bar, who promptly heeded to his request. Tommy stayed tucked in the corner, where the darkness of the room hid him. (Y/N) stole a glance in his direction to make sure he was still there. "I need to have a word with my sister," Garrett continued, his grin still present. He waited until the room was clear to speak again, "you know I don't actually know how this is still your city since you bailed on it in the middle of the night," the cockiness was present once more.

"You of all people should know why I did that," she spat back at him, not having the tolerance for him to do this now.

"Why did you even come back here?" he disregarded her statement, "did mummy write you another letter telling you how oh-so terrible things are? Did she want you to come and save her?" he was talking in a mocking voice now.

She actually did, (Y/N) thought, but didn't dare say that.

"Why did you come back here, (Y/N)? Huh?" he continued to prod when she didn't say anything, instead keeping her stone faced gaze on him.

"I came to deal with something I should have a long time ago," she answered him, her words coming through gritted teeth as she tried to keep herself calm. She'd been waiting to do this for a while now, she didn't want to mess it up or jump ahead of herself.

"Oh yeah, what's that?" he asked her, his eyebrows raised. She wasn't sure if he noticed her movement as she slowly pulled her weapon from the waistband of her skirt.

"To make sure that you can't hurt me or anyone else ever again," she told him, keeping her words steady as she brandished the weapon, holding it up for him to see. Wasting no time in pointing it at him, she kept her hands steady and her grip relaxed. She couldn't let him see how she was really feeling.

A grin slowly formed on Garrett's face as he realized what was happening now. He didn't show one ounce of fear or shock at what (Y/N) had done. "You wanna show me how much you've grown now, huh? You go to fucking Birmingham and all of a sudden you think you know how to handle a fucking weapon?!" he started screaming at her, inching closer to her as he spoke, making her shrink into herself slightly. She held the gun steady though. "Fucking show me then! Use it on me!" he taunted, moving even closer to her.

(Y/N) gritted her teeth and kept her hold. No matter how much screaming she was doing inside of her mind now, she couldn't get herself to pull the trigger. She was frozen in her spot as all of the memories of the times he'd taken this similar tone with her flooded back again.

In a flash, Garrett grabbed the gun out of her hand, managing to do so before she could even react to him. She gasped at the feeling of the weapon, and the power, leaving her hands and tried so hard to maintain her composure as he flipped the barrel around to face her, grinning like a maniac now.

"See...you don't know how to do a fucking thing. You're still the same, pathetic coward that ran away. Still scared to do anything..." he trailed off, pulling the hammer of the gun back as he kept it pointed at her. His grin grew as he stared her down. "What am I to do now? How could I possibly let you walk away from this, huh?" his final word was accentuated by the sound of the gun clicking, which made (Y/N) flinch and squeeze her eyes shut.

What brought her back was the sound of his laughter. She opened her eyes to see him opening the chamber and spinning it, seeing the bullets that were loaded into it - in all but one of the slots. He then shut it and spun it once more, eyeing her up and down as he chuckled again. "Next time you plan on killin' a person, you best remember to load your gun properly, you fuckin'..."

A loud bang sounded out in the room, stopping Garrett mid sentence. (Y/N) dropped to the floor at the sound of it, covering her head as a last ditch effort as a ringing sound took over all of her senses.

"(Y/N)!" the voice was muffled, the ringing still taking center stage. "(Y/N)!" it called again.

She didn't know how long it was before she opened her eyes again. After blinking a few times, she found Tommy kneeling in front of her. She also felt a presence to her left, but she dared not to look in that direction; knowing exactly what, or rather who, it was.

"Are you ok?" he asked her, his voice more clear now. Concern was deeply etched into his features.

"I...I think I am," she stumbled over her words, nodding slightly.

"Let's get you up then, eh?" he suggested, making her nod again as she took hold of his outstretched hand and allowed him to slowly pull her to her feet. "Are you sure?" he asked her, his eyes locked onto hers as he tried to search them; to see if he could gain any underlying clues.

"Yes," she breathed, nodding again, "is he...?" she couldn't even finish her sentence without choking up.

Tommy knew exactly what she was getting at though. "He's dead."

(Y/N) nodded at this new information. "Good," she breathed, giving another slight nod. She took a few deep breaths before someone popped into her mind. "I need to go see my mum," she said then, just barely getting the words out before she stepped past Tommy and headed for the door.

If Tommy called out for her, she didn't hear him. She exited the pub and allowed her feet to take her down the streets without much thought. She needed to see her mum, and she needed to see her now.

Next Part

Tagged: @mgcldydrms @the-anxious-youth @cloudofdisney @look-at-the-soul @elenavampire21 @mrsalwayswrite @julkaamazing @evita-shelby @lilyrachelcassidy @notyour-valentine @shelbydelrey @december16-1991 @onlydeadcells @peakyswritings @just-a-blackhole @watercolorskyy @strayrockette @peakyduchesss @alexxavicry @captivatedbycillianmurphy @yummycastiel @dark-academia-slut @tommystargirl @stevie75 @lyarr24 @signorellisantichrist @zablife @anotherblinder @midnightmagpiemama @cillmequick @l1-l4 @chlorrox @lostgirl219 @woofgocows @bdudette @mrkdvidal1989 @stephhevring @fictional-hooman @httyd-marauders @nataliewalker93 @rangerelik @thecraziestcrayon @cilliansangel @shaddixlife @tracysnook

SERIES MASTERLIST

[theskoomacat]

i want to plug Pacific Drive real quick. i had a free day yesterday so i spent it in its entirety glued to the screen. i'm not proud. check out this game!!!!!!

it's kind of like a mix between STALKER and Firewatch (by vibe. in my head). (the Impact of Roadside Picnic on our society!) idk the official genre tags on the game but at its base it is a survival game with looting and crafting.

but. you're doing all that to spoil your beautiful princess (your maybe sentient cat that maybe will kill you eventually). you spend 80% of the time in your car, it's your defense against the elements and the Zone. the gameplay loop is fairly simple - you drive, you listen to scientists bicker over the radio, you loot, you lose half your car, you HAUL ASS, you get home.

the game offers a HUGE variety of stuff to explore, from anomalies to weather conditions to biomes to the weird flora/fauna to lore. there's SO much lore, idk who decided to write a blurb for every type of paint. huge game for people who love to collect stuff. and collecting stuff is sometimes a puzzle on its own because you need different tools (which are often interchangeable, thankfully, with varying efficiency).

and driving is very fun. i have a special condition called "Played Skyrim in formative years", so the mountains are a challenge to me, not a barrier. i enjoy the fact that driving being the focal point reshapes the world significantly (from the gamedev pov), because it is built to accommodate driving instead of just running around. the roads are the main focus of all the anomalies due to that, so frankly running around would be easier than dodging the roadblocks, but also you would fucking die. it's actually funny that i regularly find the roads by the concentration of anomalies instead of like. the road itself.

the game is pretty. the GIANT walls/lab megastructures blow my mind, they're so fucking huge. BUT. one problem i have is that there are too many nights. i have already toggled "Shorter nights" on, and still it feels like 60% of rounds take place at night (maybe i'm doing something wrong idk). yes, it is a challenge, but also i wish i could see the game?

the world itself is pretty fun. i have already mentioned STALKER, which is a very fair comparison since you're in a Zone filled with Anomalies. except this time the Zone is not a strictly "natural" occurence, which mixes this genre with the "fucked up mid-20th cent american science->military complex" genre. it is really interesting to see many different opinions on what the Zone is doing in the lore. and you can draw your own conclusions from interacting with it. it is as likely to harm you as help you, and most of the time it just Fucks with you (LIM shield ilu).

what hasn't i mentioned yet? the characters are fun, an old jaded scientist lady who's entombed herself within her creation, her ex-colleague and his bf/husband who stayed in the Zone to hunt cryptids, all lovely. the music is mostly good, but unfortunately there aren't too many tracks, so some get old really quick (i WISH i got tired of DOCTOR JUICE). but do check the radio from time to time, there are cool transmissions you can catch there.

idr if there was a difficulty selector anywhere, but you can make the game easier at will in the settings - keep inventory, restore the car when back home, etc. i wish i had known about these settings when i "died" at the EXACT moment i moved to another zone, because i both lost half my inventory AND was forced to continue my run due to that lmao. the game is Not easy tbh. the first time i was in the city with a hole in the center i couldn't climb out of there because it was pitch dark and my car was so so broken, it actually made me super frustrated. but when you learn all that stuff and actually plan for it and outfit your car with it mind, it all becomes manageable and enjoyable. it is decidedly not a horror game, but it Is unsettling at times. dense fog+bigfoot weather conditions made me SO paranoid, although i didn't actually see anything lol

so yeah, i totally recommend the game if you enjoy survival games. here are also some tips for people trying the game out for the first time, aka what I wish I had known:

In the beginning doing more runs (=bringing in more anchors) will be more benefitial than turning over every rock in every zone because a lot of good stuff is locked behind upgrades. One exception - quest zones with Perpetual Stability, you can explore and loot there for an hour if you want

Shorten the nights. It's not fun to stumble around blindly, especially not in the beginning while you're still learning

Hold T to teleport your car out of sticky situations and use Y to sort inventories. idk why they don't tell you that

PLAN. Look at the resources in each location has before launching and bring extra instruments/raw materials in accordance

Invest into better batteries and renewable energy, it gets more and more important as you progress. You don't really need to upgrade the gas tank until you've upgraded the engine, unless you spend 50% of the time trying to crawl up a mountain with summer tires (off-road tires are the shit)

Skip the crowbar, the impact hammer and scrapper can do everything it does

Dying is not super scary aside from losing progress, you just lose your inventory and maybe some attachments, but you will get an opportunity to find the wreckage of your car on a different run (orange tombstone? icon) and to loot it

[priafey]

AO3 Twenty Questions

tagged by @ladytanithia. a big thank you, as always!

tagging @inkoherentwriting, @azures-grace and YOU, dear reader

(copy/paste for the questions below the cut)

1 – How many works do you have on AO3?

Four, not counting the work I published as a reference list for my OCs.

2 – What's your total AO3 word count?

84,627

3 – What fandoms do you write for?

Just TES:Skyrim for the moment. Sadly, I haven't been able to play any of the other games just yet.

4 – What are your top five fics by kudos?

I'm dying for Among the Many Lost Souls to surpass Sought and Found. It was my first venture into longform writing and it shows. Bleh.

5 – Do you respond to comments?

Almost always. If I don't respond, it's usually because I tried my darndest and couldn't think of a constructive or meaningful response.

6 – What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

The one I'm writing right now :3c (Among the Many Lost Souls). I'm putting Gwilin through the wringer and then I'm gonna hang him out to dry.

7 – What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Sought and Found, I suppose.

8 – Do you get hate on fics?

No, I don't. I lowkey wish I did. Firstly, because haters can be remarkably perceptive, and, secondly, because I am as interested in what makes someone scrunch up their nose or click away from my fic as I am about hearing people's thoughts on what was well-executed about them. I think my stuff is too niche to really draw a lot of negative attention (right now, at least).

9 – Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Always, my man! I consider it my moral duty to make my characters fuck nasty. Why? BECAUSE IT'S HOT DUHHH

10 – Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

People who write crossovers scare me so bad. I can barely limp my way through having to structure a plot around already-existing lore and making sure everything that happens in the story is congruent with in-universe rules, meanwhile there are people out there writing Skyrim x The Walking Dead crossovers. It's cocobananas.

11 – Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not as far as I know. I don't really give a fuck if people steal my shit. Fighting with someone over authorship of a work that is principally riding on the coattails of an existing IP, which can't even be monetized, mind you, feels like a real 'race to the bottom' situation to me. I'm well aware of the quality of my work and I'm proud to have the drive to constantly better my skills. That's all that matters.

12 – Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope. Though I did start translating Sought and Found into Spanish, I dropped it when I started writing Among the Many Lost Souls. In any case, I would be so, so touched if someone decided to translate a fic of mine.

13 – Have you ever co-written a fic?

Also nope. Never tried collaborative writing outside of an academic setting. Totally open to it, though!

14 – What's your all-time favorite ship?

Uh, I'm not real big on shipping existing characters. I mostly just think about my OCs, or my friend's OCs, with each other. Aside from Gwilin x [pretty much every other NPC in Skyrim], I think thoughts about @abstractredd's guys, Hedgrod and Athrar, quite often.

15 – What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Fic-related WIP? Just one. I wanted to write another romance fic (like Sought and Found) featuring a netch farmer who's a cowboy-type character. Sexy Dunmer with a southwestern accent. Brokeback Mountain: Morrowind Edition. You get the picture.

I might still finish it, but I'm reluctant to even touch it because I haven't played Morrowind, and would have to do a real deep-dive into everything related to Dunmer in TES lore to write it. I know a lot already, but I never feel like I know enough, y'know?

16 – What are your writing strengths?

I've been told I'm good at setting a scene and painting a picture. This is, I think, a new ability I acquired in the past year or so. I've also been told my smut-writing abilities are pretty good, which is always nice to hear :) If I had to list what I consider to be my own strengths, I'd add that I've gotten a lot better at cutting the fat out of my writing (especially from dialogue tags and in describing facial expressions and body language).

17 – What are your writing weaknesses?

Dialogue is a bitch a half for me to write. It's probably the thing I most obsessively tweak before publishing. I think my dialogue tends to fall short.

Pacing is another issue. I often criticize, in other fic author's works, that they present an interesting image or idea and then leave me hungry because they don't elaborate on it, but I am the biggest culprit of this if I don't constantly remind myself that, yes, people want to hear more about this or that. They want you to mystify it, justify it, make it sexy, make it like a puzzle for them to solve. You can't just leave it cut-and-dry, much as my autism compels to do because "It's quite literally saying the same thing". Like, that's great, bestie, but you have to elaborate! Say the same thing just make it sound cooler than it is!

18 – Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

This is cool. I don't mind busting out Google Translate to enjoy a fic. That mouse-hovering feature that lets you add alternative text to a fic on ao3 is super useful for this sort of thing.

19 – First fandom you wrote for?

My first, and only other, fandom: My Little Pony. I was 12.

20 – Favorite fic you've written?

I love them all for different reasons, BUT Among the Many Souls has blood and sex and drama in it, so yeah. It's in the lead.

1 – How many works do you have on AO3?

2 – What's your total AO3 word count?

3 – What fandoms do you write for?

4 – What are your top five fics by kudos?

5 – Do you respond to comments?

6 – What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

7 – What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

8 – Do you get hate on fics?

9 – Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

10 – Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

11 – Have you ever had a fic stolen?

12 – Have you ever had a fic translated?

13 – Have you ever co-written a fic?

14 – What's your all-time favorite ship?

15 – What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

16 – What are your writing strengths?

17 – What are your writing weaknesses?

18 – Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

19 – First fandom you wrote for?

20 – Favorite fic you've written?

[astelren]

BSD pregnancy with Kouyou

ೃ⁀➷ TW/CW: Fluff, Implied AFAB Reader (since pregnancy, but i dont use any pronouns or body parts), Bad English, Pregnancy, Koyou being more so a mom, Can be seen as either romantic relationship or platonic, let me know if I need to add more TW/Tags ♡ Minors please interact with me only by liking or reblogs. ➳ Characters: Koyou Ozaki �� Jealousy HCs (Dazai, Chuuya) ⤟ BSD Masterlist (soon!) ⤠ Who wants kids ⤟

Anon requested: Headcanons for koyou Ozaki with a pregnant reader please!!

Ooohh this one was interesting bc im not sure if I managed to nailed this lmfao also since you didn't specify if the koyou and reader are in a romantic relationship or not I decided to keep things very grey so that you can read it in whatever way you prefer💞

While Koyou doesn't have any experience in pregnancy herself, she can understand how troubling the period can be. So if you thought was protective before, now it's completely off the rails: she doesn't let you do any work, especially the type of work that consists in moving stuff or dealing with heavy things.

First months of the pregnancy are easy and she lets you do most things if you feel like it, although you can always sense her glare following your presence. Koyou is just making sure you are alright since you have to be careful with pregnancy, but she doesnt wish for you to feel like a burden or anything like that.

She will also keep your hair out of the way when you are vomiting, and gently caress your back in a soothing manner to help you out. Koyou is nice and gentle with you, she will probably make some tea for helping you to feel better

The more the pregnancy goes on, the more Koyou becomes more strict and careful she becomes: like I said before you can’t most tiring work, and she will demand someone to help you out or to be around you if she isn’t in the vicinity.  

Will also accompany you to whatever visit you have to make, especially if she gets to boss around people who dare to disrespect you or take too much of your time. No stranger will touch your belly without Koyou's approval, unless they went their hand off their arm…

And also whoever doctor dares gets too comfortable for her liking, she has no problem reminding them of their place especially since they are the best doctor in the place, but also deeply connected to the best. Of course, you only get the best of the best💜

But Koyou is so sweet and caring with you it makes everyone jealous: she cooks every meal for you, or asks very well known chefs, gently caressing your belly while murmuring stuff to the baby, making sure the chair is always the most comfortable and with the fluffies cushion, she never rises her voice against you in any possible way, she will even message your feet if it hurts too badly

Likes to spoils you, but that's even before you got pregnant. Koyou buys you clothes that you feel more comfortable in, clothes for the baby, toys, and even starts mumbling about having a nursery room or something like it, while you are probably thinking that you wanted to buy something for the baby too… she wouldn't let you

Takes off some days to take care of you too, and would probably remind you to have a little hobby or something to pass time during the pregnancy period. Koyou would show you many hobbies, would also try some too if you ask her, just to spend some time together

If the doctor allows it, then she is willing to let you go to a vacancy during your last months and even pay for most of it, since you will probably complain if she pays all of it. Not that she minds it, in the end, the vacancy is for you to relax so why worry over how much money you spent? Just let her.

This work belongs to @/astelren, do not repost, translate, copy, rewrite or share on tiktok without my permission. Reblogs are appreciated and encouraged♡

[copaceticjillybean]

✔★☣

✔: A plot you would love to play out with your character

OOC: Ooooh, choices choices! Well, I think a plot where Jillian and the muse my rp partner is writing keep meeting up in the same bar, talking and getting to know one another a little more each time only for Jillian to head out with another person every time. It could go several ways- a simple friendship plot, romance born out of frequent meetings, a mystery as to why the guys Jillian leaves with seem terrified to see her when she comes back after leaving with them, maybe a partners in crime type deal, all sorts of things! It could obviously be fleshed out more, but that's a plot I think could be a lot of fun! :D

★: A blog you’d love to roleplay with

OOC: Ahh, please forgive me for this, but I think I'll skip this one. I just don't want anyone who I might not be mutuals with to feel pressured by me saying I wanna write with them, in case they don't wanna write with me. But as a consolation, I WILL list a few of my favorite rp partners here instead! @cartoonslackers @a-hell-of-a-time @keeperofquestions @thehazbins There we go- just a few of the amazing peeps I rp with! :D (Edit- Okay, I'm a dirty liar. I just now thought of someone I would love to write with, and I'm only gonna tag them because they follow me and have seen me in their post's notes a few times: @grimowled I'm sorry I'm a big ol' fibberoo- please don't put me in the liar's bucket!) ☣: A pet peeve about roleplaying

OOC: Okay, I posted one of my big ones before, but this one is even bigger. It's also a peeve I have at myself about roleplaying, which is this: I hate how finicky my attention for different threads and characters can be at any given time. There are so many wonderful and amazing canon portrayals and ocs that I want to interact with, and who's muns have followed me wanting to interact. And for a while I do, but then my dumb brain decided to cling to another (equally awesome!) character, and I end up keeping my other rp partners waiting. And while everyone has been so patient, I wish I could take my brain out and shake it, so I could stop shifting focus so hard. So yeah, that's a pet peeve about my OWN rping behaviors. >u<;

[thatdesklamp]

WAIT OMG-

been reading intrinsic warmth for a WHILE and your writing is top tier!! i always wondered to myself every time i’d read a chapter why the writing just STICKS, yk? i’m a MAJOR book girlie, i read 24/7.

AND THEN IMAGINE MY SURPRISE WHEN I READ ONE OF YOUR TAGS THAT YOU PUT UP ON ONE OF YOUR POSTS WHERE YOU WERE ANSWERING A QUESTION FROM ANOTHER LOVELY READER AND I SEE THAT YOU TOOK AN ENGLISH A LEVEL?

first of all (not 100% sure on this) but i’m pretty sure only british ppl take gcses, a levels, etc. YOU’RE BRITISH?

i feel like i’ve met my other half rn over something so tiny but yeah. IT LITERALLY EXPLAINS WHY YOUR WRITING IS SO GOOD:

i could point out the NUMBER of times i’ve seen juxtaposition, symbolism, foreshadowing in your fic to someone if they’d asked me to point it out for them. at first i thought you might’ve done it unknowingly, and then i decided that nope, bc foreshadowing is such a BIG writing technique that it simply couldn’t have been by accident.

it’s one thing to know about a writing technique and another to actually be able to SUCCESSFULLY incorporate it into your writing. if it isn’t clear enough, i’m saying that you did it AMAZINGLY. you’ve got a natural talent and i’m envioussss (in a supporting way ofc 😭).

you should really look into making your own book, and i think you EXCEL at the supernatural aspect of plot in stories. your writing is so unique and different yet so warm, it reminds me of autumn (my favourite season).

idk how to end such a long message, ultimately i don’t have a reason for typing this up and shit. ik you have tons of people probably saying the same thing and it might just get repetitive for you, but i wouldn’t feel comfortable not being part of said bunch-of-ppl-probably-saying-the-same-thing.

oh! and take your SWEET TIME updating. it’s your story, your fic, your writing. the ONLY thing we readers can give you as a payback and thanks is time, patience, and understanding <3333

RAHHH BRITTANIA 💪💪💪💪

Agh. Yes—I’m British (English to be precise, sweet sweet caroline etc), hence the use of ‘u’s in words like ‘colour’ and ‘humour’, and also why everyone’s parents are their ‘father’ or ‘mother’ and not mum/dad. ‘Mom’ feels too American but ‘mum’ feels too rah engerland, yk? I’ve mentioned previously that I’m looking forward to writing fics where the characters are actually from England and where I’m actually allowed to write them the way I talk, mostly. Good lord am I excited.

And yes lol I took English for an A-Level. Bloody smashed it too, if I get to brag, mwahaha. Didn’t take it any further (I’ve also previously said that I’m a # woman in stem uni student, which is true), but I still write a killer essay imo. Give me 10 minutes to do a refresher on ‘Othello’ (it’s been a while okay) and I can talk for donkeys about his tragic fall and how much of a wanker he is. Which he is! I’m a Desdemona defender for life.

You say ‘natural talent’. PLS. No!! God no. Not at all. I wish—that would’ve made it a lot easier, but whatever I can do rn is down to bloody years of toiling away on my shitty little laptop, I promise. I’ve got another anon ask that asked about some writing tips so I’ll do the bulk of them there but my number 1 will always and forever be to practise. Whatever skill I have now has been earned over the many years. You don’t even want to see some of the stuff that will never grace my ao3 page (atla had me in a chokehold through covid and I have never been the same).

But you are genuinely so complimentary: this is so so lovely of you. Thank you?? It’s really weird being someone who writes and also someone who enjoys analysing literature; you’re right, half of the ‘techniques’ are intentional (the number of times I’ve flicked through some chapters’ drafts and thought, ‘fucks sake none of this makes sense, I need to add some decent foreshadowing or none of this will make sense in two chapters’), but also so much of my writing is just thinking, ‘hmm, this doesn’t really feel right. No no, I don’t like the vibe of this. I want this to feel more GRAAHHH and less lalalala. Lemme change this up a bit’. Whether that leads to the whole, short sentences->speeds up the pace of the reader when reading the section->increased tension, mimics actual fight encounter, etc etc (all the stuff you blag on about in eng lit), then maybe that counts as intentional? And maybe not.

Making my own book? That’s lovely of you to say but I also really don’t have any ideas for anything non-fanfic’y! Lol. I love a good bit of canon compliance, that’s my issue. That being said—hey, another eng a level reference—I’ve made multiple references here to being the world’s #1 ‘Atonement’ hater. Unfortunately, it also lives damn rent free in my head and I’ve got the bare bones of a WW2-era, perhaps epistolary, longform fic buzzing around. (Fandom: Marauders. I’m a disgrace but here we go). I’ve written nothing for it and maybe I never will, but that’s one of the only things I can see as being more standalone from original canon. Anyway: it’s the fanfic life for me. Ali Hazelwood’s life is but a distant dream.

But anyway! Thank you again for your lovely words. The next IW chapter will take a very long time, I have to be frank, so thank you for the reassurance that that’s not absolutely disgraceful lmao T_T Thanks again!! <3

[zoguy1]

I've made a thing for the Crossover Fandom

DISCLAIMER!! PLEASE READ BEFORE OPENING THE DOC: This is a project that is meant to document ALL the ships I've seen on Archive of Our Own that were tagged under the fandoms I wanted to crossover. I do not ship all the ships listed or endorse them. There are ships on this document that might upset people. I wanted this doc to be accessible to those particularly sensitive to those ships, so all of them have been moved to the bottom of the list and highlighted in a dark gray so that people who don't want to see these ships won't accidentally stumble across them. HOWEVER, not all the "Trigger Ships" (as I call them) are labeled. I've been working on this project alone, and spotting every Trigger Ship by myself is hard. If you wish to help make this document more accessible, please notify me of any ships that have not been labeled. I also ask that people don't use my doc to target people because of ships. If I am made aware that people are doing this, I'm removing public access to this doc.

So I've mentioned that I've wanted to expand my crossover universe more. And to be honest. The plans I have for my crossover universe is a lot larger than me. As in, I have ideas for something significant, but no real idea of how to implement it.

One of the ideas was to have every character get a crossover ship, but given that I'm a multishipper masquerading as a monoshipper, I didn't have a clue which ships I should implement.

So once Covid hit the States, I decided to make a document of all the existing crossover ships I've seen on Archive of Our Own, make statistics on qualities that I like in a ship and dislike in a ship, and then organize the document to show me the ships that I would like the most.

The project ended up being a lot more work than I had anticipated. Taking a total of 5 years to make. It started as a fun little project to work on during quarantine. Over time it grew into something more for better and for worse.

I really love this project. I love the final outcome, and although it's not perfect, I'm still proud of it. But I can't lie and say it was easy making this. This project took over my life, and there have been several times when I just wanted to tear the whole thing down because it was just too much for me to do. I've had to make and remake and remake and remake this project. It was exhausting.

But I'm finally to a point where I'm mostly satisfied with it and ready to let this project go. It's not perfect. There are still ships on this doc that have been mislabeled and need fixing. But I've concluded that I'm only one person, and it's not embarrassing to ask others to help.

As I've stated in the disclaimer: some ships have not been properly labeled. Not just with Trigger Ships, but also queer types and fandoms. Minor shit that I would not be able to spot because of my dyslexia. If you wish to help me out, please notify me of any fixes I need to make to the doc.

I plan on updating the stats every year, however, it takes me a long ass time to update the doc. So don't expect the 2024 edition to come any time soon.

[mayorasmusings]

So I was randomly surfing tumblr on the persona tag and I’m pleasantly surprised to find someone with Persona 2 on their list. I swear this is rarer than a 4 leaf clover, and the fact you have DDS up there as well. I’m gushing at this rn, truly a rare find.

I also saw your previous post, what would you say were your first impressions on the Cast of IS and what you think about them now? (Anyone really if you only do one but I was super curious)

- ☕️

I'm really happy to read that!

Persona 2 and DDS have a very special place in my heart.

I played DDS before I discovered that there was a game that was banned for homosexuality and Hitler. As an edgy teenager, I burned a copy of P2:IS with the translation patch and played it on my hacked PSone. Those were the times!

But, then I cried buckets, while playing this game, got obsessed with it, discovered how actually queer and traumatized I fucking was - and until this day, I am still in love with it 🥲

But without further ado:

First impression

Maya: bubbly, annoying manic pixie dream girl with a weird outfit making her big tiddies look bigger than they already are, but she has a goddamn pretty face.

Yukino: the butch friend, who shows off her toughness.

Tatsuya: he's too cool for school and is that bad boy every girl is after

Lisa: She's that "I-can-change-him!1"-girl, who goes after a boy who obviously has other things on his mind. She's sweet though.

Eikichi: annoying guy having a rivalry with the bad boy, all the girls are seemingly after.

Jun: he's too sweet for this world. I really feel sorry for him. Especially the way he was manipulated.

Impression now

Maya Amano: I love her very much. She's that fun, loving big sister everyone would want to have. Even if a little insensitive, here and there. Especially when telling that a stuffed animal would laugh at someone expressing their emotions healthily, but I blame it on her dad and the time, this game came out.

Yukino: she has a heart of gold and deserves so much better.

Tatsuya: he's caring, sweet, protective, and like everyone else, has wonderful voice-acting (Takehito Koyasu ❤️). Also, he's quite insecure and vulnerable. I really feel sad for him, having to bear the burden of knowledge in the parallel universe in EP.

Lisa: she's so sweet, caring, smart, and talented. Also, it surprised me, that she uses drugs and prostitutes herself. Her character was an interesting take, on how Westerners view Japanese people and how dehumanizing it can be, to reduce Japanese women to that submissive, demure, and prudish stereotype. Also, interesting to see her dad resembling Steven Seagal in that context.

Eikichi: having a father like this, I don't wonder about anything. He's creative, loving, and has more depth to him than he lets on.

Jun: unchanged. I really love the way he interacts with everyone and how elegant and delicate he is. Though, I do see someone with a barbed tongue, if called for, showing that he also got something from his mom's attitude. Not only from his dad's sweetness. Also, all those TatsuJun-feels 🙈

All in all, it is a very well-written cast I adore and really like to return to. I wish there was an anime or any type of follow-up to where everyone is grown up, but I'm also fine, with being left to my own imagination. Which I will unabashedly share with you.

In my AU, everyone gets to live.

Maya, Shunsuke, and Yukino open up their own little PR agency.

Needless to say that Yukki and Shunsuke are happy together.

Maya starts dating Katsuya at some point and it's quite a chaotic, but loving relationship.

Tatsuya becomes a social worker for homeless young people - being a cop wouldn't really help anyone, he decides. He is a great streetworker, who empathizes with the rather unruly parts of society. At some point, he starts working in a prison, helping the inmates with their problems.

Jun, with the backing of his parents, owns a flower shop. He and Tatsuya are happily married.

Eikichi has a successful band and is still together with Miyabi.

Lisa becomes a cut-throat-businesswoman and works as a boss of a casting-agency for pop-music. Dating hot dudes, she drops, whenever they get too annyoing.

[firespirited]

The tumblr search for dolls is near useless again between the incestplay, rapeplay, oversized body features on one hand and eating disorders on the other.

I totally don't mind other types of dolls than fashion dolls, the use of doll by black and latina trans women, "dolled up" selfies and the elegant gothic lolita community. There are also multiple bands and media properties with doll characters.

Every week someone in search is moved by Iris by the Goo goo dolls and that's beautiful, someone is sick of being a dress up doll for their mother and ready to break free, someone is grieving a relationship where they were treated like an emotional support realdoll and you wish them so much better.

Anyway here's how I blacklist without resetting search every time: either multiple tabs in firefox or have the app and a browser open to your settings: "content you see"

then you add all the junk: the fifty variations on consensual non consent kink, and try to figure out if the folks using russian doll as slavic models thinspo are using another tag so you don't end up blocking discussion about the great TV show, decide if you're ok with people mass posting about Guys and Dolls the 50s film and long fanfictions about Murder Drones. Voilà !

But yeah on a serious note, use blacklist and block liberally: the "little girl" folks post very disturbing written content.

[enbyboiwonder]

any combo of these for the fic writers ask? ❤️👻🏷👓😎💛💌 (also, hope you're doing well!)

I think I’m doing probably so-so (though I was doing better before this disgrace of a website reloaded the tab when I was 95% finished answering this and I had to restart from scratch—I am salty). I dunno how long it’ll last, especially since it’s not simply a periodic downswing, but oh well. I think playing Neverwinter Nights (and fantasizing about if not always writing Hero/Tomi fic) might be helping though, or at any rate, it ain’t hurting.

Send me fanfic author questions!

❤️ What is your favorite line that you’ve written in a fic?

The reason it took me so long to answer this—at least, before this sorry excuse of a website decided to delete everything I’d written because apparently autosaving to drafts is a thing for every type of post except ask responses—was that I had to go back and reread all (well, almost all; some of them I’d rather like to pretend don’t exist and either A. I’m still undecided on whether to orphan or not, or B. I can’t orphan them because they’re part of a series) the fics on my account. Is it weird that my fics don’t really stick in my head that long? Even when I don’t all but block them out. Anyway, it might be…

He feels safe—god, he feels like home.

from Don’t Tell Me Where the Road Ends (MacGyver 2016, macdalton). It’s not anything fancy or eloquent or anything, but idk, I still like it.

Or maybe…

He watches with poorly concealed amusement as Chika seems to work his way through all five stages of grief and back in the span of about two seconds.

from The Shape of Soup (2.43, yunichika)

(Yeah, I had difficulty choosing, so the rest—and the rest of the questions—will be going under the cut for length vvv)

Or even…

Somewhere along the way, his admiration has turned from jealousy to want—from wanting to be him to just wanting him.

the line that birthed not to remain as just a wish (2.43, odaoki)

Or possibly, since I feel like I should have one that is imagery-type/more poetic/(would it be conceited to call it eloquent?)…

His whole body is alight with the fizz of cider close beneath the surface of his skin, overflowed from the cavity of his chest to spill down his limbs and climb up his throat, pooling and sparking in all the places that Mao touched him like senkou hanabi, like miniature fireworks all their own, the brightest of all where Mao's fingers are still tangled with his, and it's wonderful and overwhelming at once.

from candy-apple red (Girls Blue, kisaragi/mao)

👻 What is your wildest headcanon?

I don’t think I have any tbh? My headcanons all tend to be more the run-of-the-mill type and/or generally accepted fanon and/or stuff extrapolated from them being clearly ADHD and/or autistic. They’re small things, like Yuni liking spicy foods but being unable to handle sour stuff while Chika loves both, or Nao liking space but not particularly caring for sci-fi, even sci-fi that’s set in space. In fact, both of those I came up with while writing the fics they show up in lmao (Lemon Squash and 流星群, respectively. Though, technically, Chika liking lemons—with the sort-of implication that Yuni doesn’t—showed up in The Shape of Soup, but that was just lemons.)

🏷️ Is there a tag you like to search for when looking for fanfics to read?

I don’t think I’ve ever gone into a content tag outside of when I was trying to see how to do something while attempting to write smut. It’s never really worked out. Even when I think I’ve figured something out, it all flew out of my head as soon as I opened my own fic. At least I prefer writing non-smutty fics, or this would be a much bigger problem than it is lmao

No, usually what I’ll do is just go into a ship (or character) tag and filter out any tag I come across that I don’t want to read.

👓 What helps you focus when you write?

Music, though that’s also just a general thing. Typically I’ll just listen to whatever I’m already listening to (which for the past few years has mostly been the 2.43 OST), but if I’ve got a specific song or set of songs in mind for a fic, I’ll generally listen to that instead. Sometimes when I’m rewriting a canon scene or writing something that includes one, I’ll just leave the show playing in the background once I’m done with it. (That’s actually how one of my 2.43 rewatches happened lmao, though I guess it only half counts.)

Of course, sometimes my brain will focus on that instead…

Yeah, I haven’t figured out how to reliably hack my ADHD. Mostly I just hope I’ll slip into hyperfocus (and then hope I’ll manage to finish it while I am, but that only very, very rarely happens. Normally I’ll come out of my daze to find I’ve added like 1600 words and I’ve got no idea how to write the missing bits).

😎 What fics do you prefer on a scale of canon compliant to wildly original?

It depends on my mood tbh. Also how much I hate canon (though it can make for some delicious angst, depending on why I hate it). But most of my fics end up being canon compliant, or at least not canon uncompliant, so I guess when it comes to writing, it would be that? Though I do also accumulate my fair share of AUs (but then, most of those are Canon AUs of one sort or another…)

💛 What is the most impactful lesson you’ve learned about writing?

I’m not so sure I’ve learned anything, and certainly not anything impactful, except that I have zero idea how to describe emotions. That, and it’s obnoxious af when people use epithets for the POV character. I can’t believe I used to do that. It makes me what to crawl into a hole and die in shame. Like, what someone/something is referred to in the narrative is how your POV character thinks of them! Your MC can’t be “the other man”—he’s the man! Everyone else is “the other” in reference to him! (That’s probably also why I’ve gravitated more consistently toward referring to the POV character by their given name, though I’ll still use surnames sometimes—and not just when we never learned their given name.)

💌 Is there a favorite trope you like to write?

I tend to prefer writing Pre-Relationship/Feelings Realization/Getting Together/First Kiss stuff over Established Relationship stuff, but I’m not so sure any of those are tropes. Wait, what does count as a trope. Cuz I also love Fluff (particularly the sappy stuff—I’ve had several turn out way sappier than originally intended) and Angst and Hurt/Comfort about equally, but I feel like those are closer to genres than tropes…

Hmm, well, I do love Character x Their Significant Annoyance (A finds B annoying/frustrating/exasperating/baffling/etc. but is still inexplicably fond of them anyway), and I feel like a lot of the fics I’ve written are for pairings with that dynamic, so let’s just go with that, shall we?

I’m also a sucker for tropes in the Fake Dating to Real Dating/Didn’t Realize They Were Dating/Practice Kissing area, though I haven’t finished very many of those, and I also love Crossdressing (particularly sticking unfeminine men in women’s clothing and/or guys just casually wearing women’s clothes), but I haven’t finished any of those, either. Granted, some of those involve smut, which could explain it, but it’s not like all of them do. Half or less.

Plus there’s The Italicized Oh, and I love sticking those sorts of moments into my pre-relationship fics, even if there is no actual italicized “oh.” Just—the yearning. I’m an absolute sucker.

[notfivefives]

Prompt fill #6 for my @badthingshappenbingo​ card, requested by @sharkluv. Thank you so much for the ask! This is not the story I was expecting to write (like, at all), but I really enjoyed working on it. I hope you enjoy reading it! Also tagging @rain-on-kamino​!

Prompt Filled: Manhandling

Fandom: Star Wars: The Bad Batch

Title: Salvage 

Characters: Crosshair, Hunter, Wrecker, and Tech

Word Count: 2,033

Summary: Crosshair’s chip doesn’t trigger during Order 66, but the rest of The Batch’s do. Crosshair disobeys an order.

Chapter: 1/1

Warnings: Non-canonical character deaths, forced ( but nondescript) medical treatment

My BTHB Card

Read below the cut or on AO3

The walk from the Marauder to their quarters is like a funeral procession. Crosshair trails his three brothers - They are still his brothers, aren't they? - and after they enter their quarters, the door slides shut with a finality Crosshair can’t recall ever noticing before.

He crosses the distance to his bunk just like he has after countless other missions, but Wrecker isn’t boisterously recounting the high notes of the mission and he hasn’t carved a hash mark on the wall to commemorate their victory.

And it is a victory, Crosshair decides; he's just unsure why.  

He neatly stows his equipment and sets his rifle on the common table, relieved when the heft of it no longer puts demands on his wounded shoulder. He will see to that later, once the others are asleep or absent. For now, he’ll clean his weapon because that’s what he always does. And he will keep Hunter, Tech, and Wrecker in his periphery and he will try not to think too much about why Echo isn’t with them. When he turns to get his cleaning kit, Hunter approaches him. Crosshair straightens and studies Hunter as intently as he is studying him.

“You should let me take a look at that,” Hunter says as he inclines his head toward the singed plastoid at the intersection of Crosshair’s chest plate and right pauldron.

“Nothing to look at.”

Where there might usually have been a dubious smile on Hunter’s face, there isn’t now. There is a tightness around his eyes and something sharp and unyielding there instead.  

“I’m fine.” Crosshair’s words come out icily, and they would be convincing if Hunter wasn’t the one listening. But Hunter’s privy to every electromagnetic pulse and vibration, scent, and every other type of sensory input that slips beneath the notice of most. Crosshair has never envied Hunter the intensity of his senses, never wished to know the reek of a battlefield the way Hunter must. But that doesn’t stop Crosshair from cursing Hunter in the privacy of his own mind and loathing him just a little bit for not shutting things out, for not shutting it off. For just knowing.

“Is that why your heart rate just jumped, and why I can smell the stink of infection?”

Damn.

“Leave it alone.”

Crosshair narrows his eyes and focuses on the deep, ceaseless pain, wills it to temper his resolve. He itches to be anywhere but under Hunter’s scrutiny. He traces the tip of his tongue along the backs of his teeth, quelling the urge to reach for a toothpick.

“I need you functional,” Hunter presses as he takes a step closer to Crosshair and reaches toward him.

Crosshair takes a clipped but still-graceful step away from Hunter and scoffs. The derisive noise is louder than he intends and he can feel Tech and Wrecker’s eyes on him. They’re not listening to an argument with interest or waiting to throw their opinions into it. They’re just watching, waiting. The instinctive thing Crosshair has been feeling since Koller lurches into clarity.

He is outnumbered.

“I said leave it alone, Hunter.”

Crosshair can see a minuscule twitch in Hunter’s jawline, and his expression grows harder. Just like it had on Koller before-

Crosshair shakes off the memory and sidesteps Hunter and avoids the temptation to punctuate his disdain by checking Hunter’s shoulder with his own. No use in causing himself more pain.

He wants out of this room, and he wants away from his batch. Hunter grasps Crosshair’s forearm and Crosshair wrenches away. That ignites fresh agony in his shoulder and he sucks in air through his teeth. He reaches for the wound, but stops short and puts his arm back down at his side, straightens, and looks from Hunter to Tech to Wrecker, then back at Hunter, trying to gauge how much weakness he just displayed.

“Don’t touch me,” he says. The threat in his voice grows jagged and brittle with each syllable.

He walks toward the door and the blood rushing in his ears and the hair pricking at the nape of his neck tell him the same cold, clear truth.

You should be running.

Crosshair makes it two steps before he hears Hunter say Wrecker’s name.

“Right,” Wrecker says. There’s eagerness in his tone that’s familiar but wrong and for once Crosshair wishes Wrecker was as slow as some people - idiots mostly - thought he was.

Crosshair makes it another two and a half steps before Wrecker is between him and the door. Silently, Hunter falls into place behind him, and Crosshair can feel him there, the trigger in a trap that is ready to slam shut.

Tech hasn’t moved; he’s watching proceedings, assessing them from behind the yellow lenses of his goggles. Crosshair doesn’t doubt Tech can tell him the precise likelihood he’ll make it out of their quarters, but he doesn’t have to. Crosshair knows it’s laughably slim.

“Get out of my way, Wrecker.”

Wrecker moves his head back and forth and raises his hands, palms outward, ready to catch Crosshair or fight him if it comes to that. Crosshair bends at the knees and flexes his fingers, and he realizes it will come to that.

And he doesn’t know why.

“Enough,” Hunter warns. “Remove your kit. Let us treat the wound. Now. That’s an order.”

An order.

This isn’t a professional disagreement or a fraternal spat. Hunter’s words are absolute and Crosshair feels as though he’s being tracked through the scope of someone else’s rifle. He glances back at Hunter without looking away from Wrecker completely. Hunter’s expression is hard and direct. Expectant. Hunter’s esteem for his own rank is inconvenient at best and unnerving at worst.

Crosshair followed orders every day of his life. He followed them to complete missions, to win. He followed them because it was in his very marrow to do so. Freedom from choice has always been a mercy - though the rest of The Batch would never admit it, not even Tech - but before today, that mercy has never felt like slow suffocation.

When Hunter reaches for his arm again, Crosshair disobeys.

He swings back at Hunter’s head with his elbow. He knows it's a bad move.

Hunter catches his arm easily and twists it behind him. The countermeasure hurts, but it’s not hard enough to be cruel. Maybe Hunter is still in there somewhere after all. Crosshair wants to believe that. He suddenly, desperately needs to believe that, but he contorts in Hunter’s grip and viciously curses as Hunter’s hold tightens.

“What are you doing?” He tries his best to bury his pain and the spike of fear with indignation as he tries to pull away. “Don’t touch me.”

Then Wrecker is there and Hunter hands him off as casually as he would an ammo cartridge.

“We’re going to help you, Crosshair.” It’s the closest thing to patronization Crosshair has ever heard in Wrecker’s voice and he hates it. Lula is lying discarded on the floor, half buried under an old panel that Tech had likely been using for one project or another between missions. The tooka, with her red eyes and forlorn lip lipline, is the only thing in the room that feels familiar.

Crosshair turns away from the doll and futilely tests the constraints of Wrecker’s arms.

“I can help myse-”

“Bring him to the table,” Hunter orders. He’s crouched next to Echo’s bunk searching out the med kit Echo keeps there.

Wrecker nudges Crosshair in that direction, letting him know compliance is a good idea. He digs his heels into the durasteel beneath him and pushes back hard. He may as well be trying to move a wall.

"No," Crosshair says. He can hear the ragged edge of desperation wearing at his own voice as he lunges back toward the door. Wrecker holds him tight.

He tries to crush Wrecker’s instep, but he only catches armor and there’s no indication Wrecker even noticed. He’s only managed to send new pain screaming through his shoulder, but he bites back on the agony and struggles.

It makes no difference.

Crosshair cries out in surprise when Wrecker tugs backward, using his own weight against him. Wrecker keeps him from falling flat on his ass, but panic lances through him when he can’t get his feet beneath him again. His boots stutter pathetically on the floor, but that ceases when Wrecker hauls him up and toward the table.

“No!” He’s struggling now, writhing without regard for how frantic and ineffectual it is. “Let me fucking go!”

With dizzying speed, Wrecker lifts him and hefts him onto the tabletop. The back of Crosshair’s head hits the table. It’s enough force to stun, but not enough to do any harm, and in the fleet seconds it takes Crosshair’s mind to catch up to what’s happened, Wrecker has both of his wrists in one massive hand, pinning them over his sternum. Wrecker’s other hand forces his left leg down by the thigh.

“This outburst is unnecessary,” Tech says as he takes his place on the side opposite Wrecker. There’s something like commiseration in Tech’s words, but there’s callous interest in his eyes.

Crosshair drives his unrestrained knee up toward Tech, but Tech anticipates the attack and catches his leg with quick hands.

“You should cooperate,” Tech grunts. He shoves Crosshair’s leg back down and Crosshair takes petty satisfaction in the disapproval on Tech’s face.

“You should let me go.” Crosshair says, breathless and caustic. Wrecker laughs at that. It’s not booming or jovial. It’s the distant rumble of a storm.

Crosshair bucks beneath their hands, all lean muscle, obscenities and fear. He thrashes harder when Hunter sets the medkit by his head. He looks down at Crosshair, dour but thoughtful.

“Where are you going to go, Crosshair?” he asks as he begins to remove Crosshair’s armor.

Crosshair shouts. Neither the harsh sound nor the rage behind it makes his brothers flinch; it doesn’t make them do anything at all. They all know the answer. By the time Hunter is satisfied with the amount of armor he’s taken away, Crosshair is panting and his limbs are trembling from the strain.  

Hunter draws his vibroknife from its sheath and Crosshair’s eyes go wide. He stills and groans involuntarily when he sees the honed, glinting blade in Hunter’s skilled hand.

It’s been cleaned since its last use.

General Bilaba’s padawan had been fast. So fast, Crosshair’s first shot following Hunter’s order had gone wide, and his second one had struck him after it had been deflected back at him by the padawan’s lightsaber. He’d lifted the butt of his blaster rifle to his left shoulder instead of his right and found Hunter in his scope, advancing on Dume. One elegantly efficient move put a burst of crimson on Koller’s snow-covered ground. The roar of the falls had been the only sound.

Crosshair shakes his head and jerks helplessly.

“Shh,” Hunter says without sympathy or warmth. Crosshair is frozen while Hunter cuts away the dark gray underlayer. The blade separates the fabric with awful ease, then Hunter sheaths it without any flourish.

A hypo comes after that. Crosshair tries to flinch away, but it still finds its way into his shoulder, and as the pain abates, Hunter works slowly and methodically, cleaning and dressing and bandaging until he seems satisfied that Crosshair would still be of use to him. To this nascent Empire.

Crosshair’s mind feels slow and his chest feels tight. He doesn’t even have the energy to move after Tech releases his hold on his leg. Tech scans him and shows Hunter with an unconcerned shrug. If Crosshair is on trial, perhaps this small jury has already come to its judgment.

The pressure Wrecker’s been putting on him lets up. When breathing comes more easily, he rolls his head to the side and looks at Echo’s empty bunk.

“Where’s Echo?” He rasps. “Where’s the reg?”

“CT-1409 was in violation of Order 66,” Tech says, as though it explains everything. “But perhaps, with some re-education, you can be salvaged.”

Hunter nods as he packs away Echo’s medkit.

Crosshair doesn’t fight as Wrecker helps him into his bunk.

He curls on his side and drifts.

[crow-if]

FRIENDSHIP & RELATIONSHIP/ROMANCE SYSTEMS.

FRIENDSHIP POINT SYSTEM MECHANICS: I want y'all to know that this game is as much in favour of friendships as it's for romance.

Whether you are here to build close relationships or even destroy and rebuild them, you are equally welcome.

This game is designed for the purpose of building different kinds of relationships with many people within the Earth realm, as well as character development. And THE RELATIONSHIP/FRIENDSHIP SYSTEM will obviously keep track of your relationships with different characters/orgpanisations around you. It also does not only affect your relationships, but the story flow as well.

NOTE: It is advisable for players in their first time to play freely, and to choose options that suit their MC's personality, without paying much attention to the points collected since the points are a double-edged sword either way.

That being said I'd like to elaborate more on the ROMANCE/FRIENDSHIP POINTS SYSTEMS MECHANICS. 

•While some scenes may differ according to the number of romance/friendship points you've collected with said RO, you do not need or have to select every romance/flirting choice to romance that character. You're free to interact as you wish.

•Some characters will be initiative depending on their personality, so the player will have the option 1-to refuse them completely, 2-keep them at bay until their MC have decided or 3-accept their advances. The second option is so that the RO will stay on the MC's radar until they've settled their mind, while the first one is for the player not to feel uncomfortable being hit on by a character they don't fancy.

•SOME CHOICES WILL BE TAGGED: Every romance/friendship will have a different path or different way of interacting. Which means, some choices may turn out to be a romance choice but don't seem/sound like it. Since the romance choice could be an argument or a little banter between the two characters.

This is in order to build a realistic relationship with the characters, which is not based on flirting only. And the player does not have to be in a state of passion and bulging heart eyes at all times. (if they don't want to.)

•For demisexual MCs, the MC will obviously be able to reject/dismiss said RO's sexual advances (and talk about it) until they've become better acquainted, and choices such as these will be marked so that the RO won't be blocked from the player as an option.

Therefore, I will mark/tag [♡] romance choices to avoid any possible misunderstandings.

Some ROs detailed profiles. SKILL SYSTEM and WITCH TYPE/NATURE SYSTEM will be on the way soon.