#I also got to see her mom again since we were 18 so that was nice
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lizardho · 30 days ago
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I came out to my dad as bisexual at 14 and I was PANICKED because I had a crush on a guy in my Boy Scout troop and thought I was Going To Hell Forever and he was so kind and understanding of my distress, but he had NO idea what bisexuality was. He just said “yeah but you like girls too? This is normal. Everyone is like this.” And I love my dad and trust him with my life to this day and the idea that the concept of bisexuality had not occurred to him had not occurred to me so I put it off.
By 16 though I had a crush on like THREE boys. Three entire boys in my Boy Scout troop. I felt like my sin was slowly advancing, until like an untreated cancer it had become metastatic. I remember bawling my L’il limp-wristed sissy eyes out in his big rumbly truck on the way home from a scout meeting and him telling me that it was OK, that he still loved me if I was gay, but that he knew I wasn’t gay because I still had crushes on women and that meant I was straight. I didn’t quite know how to explain that those felt *~*different*~* and that I felt like I was losing a fight to evil inside me but I again felt comforted by his reassurances and his genuine fatherly love.
At 18 I was like “hey I’m realizing all my friends are going on missions. I don’t wanna do that. Idk how to say that and I don’t have a ‘good enough’ reason to not wanna go.” So I just put it off. Again, my parents were extremely supportive of the information I gave them (I blamed it on perpetually forgetting to start the paperwork.) and one day my mom texted me that she had done the paperwork for me! And that all I needed was to get a physical! So I did that (it was awkward af tbh, my hernia check was done by a trainee doctor and she spent like 3 minutes fishing around my inguinal canals before her attending rescued me) and was sent to Mexico City where I learned that in addition to dipshit himbos with strong hands and scruffy guys with artistic hearts I was REALLY into chubby Latin men with strong personalities who bullied me a little when I lived in Mexico.
I remember my first companion got annoyed with me during an argument and said we were just gonna wrestle and whoever won the wrestling match won the argument (I stg I am dead serious this happened.) I was like…SWEATING when he tore off his tie and threw his white button-down shirt onto the ground (I won btw, don’t ask me how).
I remember one of my companions with this really intense, almost manic energy telling me that he was gonna make sure I was safe in a new area I didn’t know very well. He cooked breakfast for me and we’d go shopping together on P-Days and in the mornings before breakfast he’d jog around and do pull-ups with his shirt off and I’d do anything but look at him because my face would break out in a sweat so intense he’d think I was crying and come over to see if I was OK and somehow make it worse. He let me play D&D with myself in the evenings even though it was against mission rules because he knew how lonely and stressed I was.
I remember one of my companions was a big chubby man with a loud voice and a great sense of humor. He was kind and direct when addressing conflicts with me, and always bragged about how he knew the secrets of women’s minds and it felt like he really did since it almost always boiled down to “Treat Them Like People and Love Them a Lot. Don’t Stop Being A Person For Them. Also Eat Them Out Sloppy Style.” Our P-Day activities sometimes felt like dates, and it seemed like he was more attentive to my emotional state than I was since he was always the first to suggest we slow down our Divinely Mandated, God-Ordained, Super Sacred Work and Wonder to get a snack or check out a Pawn Shop (I love Pawn Shops).
I remember another companion who asked me to bully him every time he did something against his goal of losing weight. It was like he gave me Carte Blanche to take out my crush on him by being a nuisance and I LOVED that. I remember having a breakdown one day after we’d spent the afternoon frantically cleaning our disgusting-barely-habitable mission house to make it look less vile that it was (not our fault imo?) and I started bawling and he pulled me into a hug and he smelled good and he told me he knew it wasn’t just the house and that I was mad at him for being a Huge Dickhead for about a week (true) and that he would work on it. (He’s also a huge chaser but that’s a separate thing.)
I remember one of my companions waking up early (and our schedule is already built for sleep deprivation) to make me a “birthday cake” from knock-off Nutella and bread. He used matches for candles and woke me up, lit the ‘candles,’ pulled them out, then smashed it in my face and took a bunch of pictures while I was still madrugada and disoriented as fuck. He had the same sense of humor as one of my HS crushes and I could push his buttons pretty easily which was so fun.
I came home from my mission and started back at BYU where I became actively and aggressively suicidal. I had a stalker the year I moved up there and my dad’s solution to that was to get me a gun. I know he wouldn’t have bought me a gun if he could have read my mind, but I had a loaded pistol under my bed during a trifecta faith/sexuality/gender crisis and that was not helpful. I remember that the day I decided to kill myself I figured I’d call the BYU CAPS and see if I could get into therapy because it felt like what I was “supposed to do” so I could check my suicide boxes. My therapist was the guy who’d helped me pick a major the year before and was this drop-dead gorgeous Hawaiian man who cried when I told him how I’d been feeling.
A few weeks into therapy I met another stunning man with soft eyes and a scruffy illegal-at-BYU beard he kept pushing his luck with. He was funny, kind, patient, married, and wouldn’t give me the time of day if he knew I was crushing on him. We were in my history of psych class, which was inarguably the worst psych class I have ever had, and we studied together for every assignment and test and I realized that my feelings for him and for all the men I’d already mentioned were in direct conflict with my faith and relationship with God. My already agonizing spiritual conflict became even more wretched and as a result of this plus some other tightly-packed experiences with Mormonisms bullshit, I left the church.
After leaving the church I decided to move back to AZ and transfer to ASU. My mom helped me get a dog since I think it had started to dawn on my family that my mental health was barely getting me through the day, and she knew that we both loved dogs. Madi made my last year at BYU livable while I got my shit together and transferred. In that last year, I went on a date with quite possibly the only semi-openly-out trans person on BYU campus. It was not a great date imo, I was not doing well, but the person I spoke with was fun and fascinating and talked to me about Gender Dysphoria and it really cemented my need to go. To leave and never come back to that fucking school.
I started at ASU a month after my last semester at BYU and within a very short time frame it felt like I was coming back together, like a puzzle magically putting itself together in an environment that wasn’t slowly draining that puzzle’s will to live.
On the 4th of July, the year I started at ASU, I saw a transition timeline photo of a gorgeous happy beautiful happy radiant happy woman and her former Mormon missionary self and I realized the light that was on in her eyes was the light that was off in mine. I looked into transitioning for 3 days, sleeping about 10 hours total during that time. I started talking to other trans people on Reddit (one of whom is now my beautiful fiancée @cintailed) and after about a month of making preparations to be disowned and kicked out, something I was not sure would happen but was ready to go through to Turn On The Lights, I came out to my family and it was amazing. I started HRT a month after that. I secretly dated some dorky guys for about a year while I applied to grad schools. I got into a great grad school for me and my needs. I got FFS. I did my trainings and classes. Me and my fiancée moved in together after some LDR shenanigans. We’ve lived together now for 4 years of basically marital bliss. We have a cat named Grandmother Esmeralda Weatherwax who bites the hell out of my feet about three times a day. My bi-cycle continues to be part of my life but now it’s not as scary. Baby gays in my life have started to look to me for advice. Idk how this all happened so fast. When the years, months, weeks, days, and hours seems to crawl by so slowly now they are rushing past me so fast it’s almost bewildering. Whereas before I felt like I was living on borrowed time, past my ‘expiration date,’ now it feels like I can Fucking Breathe. I’m training myself to slow down now and it feels worth it to Live In The Moment.
Idk why I wrote this. Idk why these thoughts only seem to come up on Sundays when I’m supposed to be writing my dissertation. Idk why I’m crying rn or why I feel so happy. I’m gonna post this shit then get on with my dissertation I guess. Read more Terry Pratchett and give yourselves the time you need. Get a pet. Talk to someone. Re-examine the events that brought you here. Be gayer. Love y’all 💕
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cryptfile · 3 months ago
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✶ nuclear seasons, [ soldier boy x reader ]
summary — he was friend’s with your mom. friend is a understatement cause when he appears in the middle of the night looking for revenge in your little apartment in the suburbs, you know he’s far from being nice.
warnings — +18 minors dni, smut, dead dove do not eat, we have a last name (also a mother!), kind of porn without plot? but not really cause it HAS one okay, we call it 50/50, fem!reader using she/her pronouns, p in v, masturbation ( m! receiving but blink and you miss it), dirty talk, age gap, choking, degradation, spitting (i'm sorry), fingering, mentions of injury, cancer (not you tho), tons of tension.
side notes — i’m never experiencing the post ovulation clarity lmao, that being said english is not my first language so sorry for any mistakes, also i’m a whore for jensen ackles, and i stand for what i like proudly. // 5k+
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Nightshade is a hero.
You're proud of your mother since you were pretty young. The hero that fought against Vought to death during the time Payback was active, America’s Troublemaker that you only knew as Stella Nightshade, a blonde woman that talked with the death during her golden years.
Maybe it’s your mother the one that pushed you to fight crime, to pursue the bad guys and look out for the victims that can’t stand for themselves, so even when you don’t inherit much from Stella’s gifts, you joined the CIA as soon as you can so you can do something that matters.
You’re the best in your class, work your ass off to be taken serious, to be more than the look of disappointment you receive when people ask, once again, if you have any powers like your mother and you have to admit — In pure shame, that you didn’t born as a superhero but a baby who cried loudly when is too hungry.
But as years pass you make a name for yourself, one that even if differs from Stella’s job has the same noble reasons behind. You also realize you were too naive growing up, believing in heroes that don’t deserve to be called that way.
The country has made a mistake on making superhumans so openly, and it’s clear that got out of control now, backfiring as they got so much power it’s almost impossible to take accountant of any of them.
You’ve worked along Grace Mallory from the shadows, and even when Stella would not be so proud of you for helping get his kind out of the streets, the justice is enough to feed you and keep you warm on a cold night.
You like it that way. You know Grace has a team for it, a legal army of supe-haters as you called them, yet, you prefer to stay in the dark, not let your personal life get involved cause one slip and you can lose it all— Even when you don’t have nothing at all. You like to have an outside life from work, it’s the sane thing to have, so when the CIA Deputy Director asks you about joining the infamous Boys, you politely decline assuring the woman you’ve been more helpful from the outside.
What would Stella Nightshade would say? Now that you’ve grown older and you don’t look at her the same way you used to when you encounter her files and read about your mother. You know she has done wrong, yet with the years, you don't imagine Soldier Boy himself was going to seek for revenge first thing he does when he wakes up, his plan including your mother even when she was long time dead before he even appeared in the picture.
That night especially you let your guard down. It's been a rough couple of weeks back in work, so when the night comes you're a victim of the stress, victim of your bosses and the people that surrounded you. You pour a glass of wine for yourself, light a cigarette even when you haven't smoked in years, and turn on the TV to see something else rather than the face of Homelander in every single channel you've been tuning lately.
It's a weapon. When you leave for a warm shower and start filling the bathtub, you're not aware of what that night was really going to be for you. Oblivious as you stand naked in the middle of the bathroom, holding the glass of wine between your fingers before entering the warm current that relaxed your muscles.
It seems tension is your worst enemy, makes your muscles feel like stone as you got in the water, the cigarette that hangs from your dry lips splashing with tiny droplets of perfumed water as the silence filled the air. It's what you needed, at least ten minutes with your brain shutting off completely, the pleasure you haven't experienced in forever by being so compromised with work.
It's a much-needed break. The smoke that leaves the room by the almost-closed window, the taste of wine still lingering in your lips as you sip another taste of the crimson liquor you love. You don't happen to notice when he's breaking in your apartment, silent and deadly as you were protected by a door closed and a white curtain.
You don't happen to hear him too. The music coming our from your phone is loud enough to silence the knocks on your door at first before breaking the wood, you're too deep in the still water that smelled like roses and vanilla, to even pay attention to what was going on outside the warmth of the four walls that surrounded you.
There's vapor coming out of the water and you find comfort in closing your eyes, in letting the blow of the smoke travel through your throat before suspending itself in the air, flowing as you drank.
In your defense, you haven't been like that in ages.
It's been a long time since you last fill the tub and have a relaxing session with yourself, so it makes sense you are enjoying it a little bit too much, too much cause when the invader is making a lot of noise when stepping into your property, you still enjoy the taste of the alcohol on your lips.
The ashes fall to the ceramic floor outside the tub and you should blame the CIA to make you so tense to the point it leads you to more problems than you ever had. In the dark room of your apartment, it's Soldier Boy the one who's going through any drawer he comes across, the ones closed, the ones hidden, any slit he can find, any clue that can trace your mother back to his personal vendetta.
He's oblivious to Stella's death and her daughter, so when the former superhero hears the noise in the bathroom he's fully convinced it's your mother the one who's behind that door, that she's the one who's going to tell him the truth, if she also sold him to the russians as well in the process.
He's decided also on killing her. She must need it after all that time getting older, closer to death more than ever.
Of course it's an unpleasant surprise when you can see the bathroom door opening when you're sure you left the front door closed and lock with at least two bolts to prevent anyone from getting inside, it makes you jump in the spot, quickly covering yourself from the new stranger that enters your bathroom.
"Stella?" he asks, it's the last room that the hero needs to check for himself.
You spot the green fabric of his suit immediately as you pressed your chest against the cold surface of the tub, and when the invader notices you're naked, he doesn't look away as any person with a hint of respect would do, but instead, continue on checking you out as you try to cover yourself in the water tinted in a nonexistent transparent color red.
You can feel his gaze as soon as you recognize him too, as you happen to notice that face from your mother's pictures, the propaganda in the TV when he did almost every commercial back when you were a kid. It's a shock, and dressed in his damn suit, you don't know why an old superhero is there standing beneath the yellowish bulbs of the light your bathroom happens to have.
Your cheeks adopt this pink color as you panic, grabbing the cup of wine to throw the liquid in the floor, breaking it against the marble walls just to shatter the glass in pieces, a weapon of defense as you lifted up against him.
"You're not Stella."
Soldier Boy looks amused: it's funny that you think you'd be able to kill him with shattered glass, yet he lets you keep thinking that way when he's enjoying the view.
Is he to blame? He just got out from this giant cooking oven back with the communists and he hasn't got his way with a lady since what seems are centuries, so when he spots you in the tub he simply cannot contain himself from peaking around. You should be in what? Not more than your 20's? Soft-looking skin that asked to be marked with his hands, by the force of his lips crashing in your flesh.
The thought is compelling, you're looking all feisty with the glass in your hand, threatening him and speaking something Soldier Boy cannot catch at first — Shit, he doesn't even notice the blood in your hand that's dripping all over your small rug in the floor, the power women like yourself seemed to have now and weirdly enough, a huge turn on.
"Get the fuck out!" you scream in an authority voice, the same you use back at work when you're mad, when you're usually holding a gun in defense more than a piece of broken glass "Stella is not fucking here!"
It takes a few more words to actually get him out of there, and as he closes the door behind him you finally stand to grab a towel covering from the currents of wind, trying, really hard, to think about anything else more that the fact that Soldier Boy has entered your house and your bathroom in the worst moment, far from what you were last updated with.
To be honest, it almost gave you a heart attack, leaving the bathroom to find your home torn apart, the drawers open and all the papers you've meticulously kept in place being all over the place as Ben stands awkwardly holding a shield in the middle of your living room.
"Fucking hell" you're cursing under your breath as you gathered some important things you cannot leave on the floor even when you're still wet from the shower, expelling this nice aroma that mixed the roses and the vanilla together with your personal scent — Weirdly enough, a fucking show to the hero that's already rock-hard from the peak he had of you from before.
You don't really notice it at first, too busy being mad as you let the papers you gathered on top of the table. You lose the shame you got left as the wet drops of the shower leave a trace in the floor — And as usual, you clearly don't notice it, but Ben does when the water is running down your back, and you're barking something about calling someone called Grace, holding onto a white tower with your dear life.
"Where is Stella Nightshade, sweetheart?" he speaks out loud cause he don't understand anything you say, really fighting to be nice with you like it would give him an opportunity to get under your skin.
"My mother's dead," you stand there without knowing what to say after. You know he and your mother were close, but you don't imagine he was going to actually go find her teammate when he recently woke up in a different country. "She died years ago dude, i'm sorry."
The information gathers in his head as you take a clean oversized shirt from the laundry basket covering with it as you throw the towel to the floor, Red Hot Chili Peppers it says, but he thinks it's a place in Italy more than a band like he isn't troubled already by the fact you were Stella's daughter, the person who thought was her only friend back in the time now dead.
"Does anyone know you're here?" your mind is drifting back to work again as you wondered if anyone knew he was going to break into your apartment and choose not to send any help — "Ben."
You've read his file. Hell, to be honest you've read every single file in Payback, so it's no surprise you know his name, but to the hero, it seems to be amusing when you call him by his real name, his mind fueled in a different direction as he notices you're not wearing any underwear beneath the shirt you're choosing to wear, one whose fabric's barely covering your tights.
"What do you mean dead?" he asks, furrowing his brows "It's not been so long."
"She got cancer three years ago" you explain with a sad tone, even when you disagree with Stella, it pains you to remember what sickness made out of her, consuming her from the inside at a cruel pace.
"Motherfucker," he states clearly angry, and you cannot help but look at him with a weird face, searching for the phone you left in the sofa to call any-fucking-body in the office that could send a damn army to get you: Didn't the Boys have everything under control? That's what you're told anyway, then why the fuck is the subject of matter cursing in your little messy apartment? — "Bitch just got away with it before I could do anything, isn't it? What a fucking shame."
"Pardon me?" it catches you by surprise at first, but it hits you soon after. Soldier Boy is not there to say hello to your mother or ask for her help, but instead, he's there to get revenge and actually kill Stella by his own matters.
Fuck. Of course is something new, something that makes you feel cold all sudden, your wet hair making you visible shake as you became aware of his plans.
"You know them. You know the people from the lab" it's more of a fact than a question, letting the words feel salty in his own mouth. "The ones that let me get away."
He's quickly to gather the pieces too, not as dumb as you think he is as the puzzle is finally coming up together in his head, and it's all it takes for him to take a step closer to you, cutting that space you've created since you kicked him out of the bathroom — He's angry now.
The red globe on his hand is now holding you by the throat, applying enough pressure to cut the air flow going to your lungs almost completely, his fingertips warm against your bare skin as he holds you in front of his figure, pushing you against the cold wall.
You usually would enjoy such activities, yet in the context you are trapped in right now, you began to choke, your own hands trying to push his grip back even when he’s too strong, not even flinching when you’re squirming, gasping for some air as your face became red, tears gathering in your eyes as he let you breathe for a couple of seconds when he senses you’re too close to black out.
“Talk little Nightshade” he says in a low voice. “Or else i’m breaking your pretty neck.”
“I work for the CIA!” You explain quickly as your breathing became more labored by the seconds. “Not for the people who let you out! I promise!”
He’s going to kill you. You can see the determination in his eyes, that predator look he happens to have.
What you don’t know, somehow, is that he’s going fucking insane. Your smell coming up to his nose to make him shiver, the sight of you in an oversized shirt that barely covers your shape is more than enough to push his buttons, to make him forgot about any killing he was allegedly so concentrated in fulfill, the sight of you almost crying messing with his brain.
Little Nightshade is a fucking tease.
His eyes follow your expression, the hand that gripped your neck and choke you harshly now pressing enough to only suppress the air flow in a more enjoyable way, the tension quickly shifting from dying to pleasure all over again as he kept you in place so easily.
It’s impossible to move, to do anything more than be pressed against a cold wall. Your mother has once again lied to you and you notice the relationship she painted with Soldier Boy was more of a movie in her head than reality itself. Makes you gulp in response when you stare at his expression, the face of a trained killer as you knew, fucking knew, a bit more of force in your neck and it would snap without any difficulty.
“I don’t work with them” you assure once again, maybe it’s your survivor skills hitting when you repeat it in a low voice, catching on your breath when he lets go allowing you to fill your lungs with air just enough before pressing that very spot again, the one that actually turns you on. “Fuck’s sake.”
Is that how you end? On your lame apartment?
The next is a weird thing, cause in the blink of an eye he’s close to your face planting his own body next to yours and you’re shivering at the feeling, his armor pressed against your chest as he left the shield he was holding on the floor.
The metal is pressed against your skin covered by the thin cotton of Red Hot Chili Peppers shirt, and he is so close, so close you froze there, no longer fighting his tight grip but mesmerized by his damn face, the same you watched on TV when you were a kid, the handsome man you happen to severely crush on in secret, just because you don’t want Stella to know or she will give you a long talk about how he is her age.
But he is, handsome as fuck, and now being so close to his face you can say it with all confidence. His beard is shaved perfectly and he smells incredibly good even for someone who has spent time locked away without any kind of hygiene, his green suit protecting him from the cold air that was getting through the opened window.
“Who are you?” he asks, scanning your face with a curious look as he wanted to know what expression you would have when you know why he's there in the first place — “What do you know about Stella Nightshade, your mother, selling me out?”
Fuck. So that's why he's there. You know she did it. And it's impossible for you to lie when he's making you so nervous, away from any weapon, any form of defense as you left the glass in the bathroom sink when you notice large gash on your hand, and your silence makes nothing more than leave him fuming. If he was angry before, he now reaches a higher level as his grip turns more violent now that he knows you know what he meant, why he's there claiming to talk with your death mother out of nothing.
"Call her then. Use your powers" he demands dryly, and you're shaking at this point cause it's more shame added to the long pile, the bathroom already being a humiliation by itself. "Fucking call her."
You squirm beneath his grabbing, when he's pushing you harder against the concrete wall and you can just feel him from under the suit, hard cock pressing against your belly, green in your vision as he towers over you. He knows what he's doing, and even when you try to be disgusted by it, you find yourself enjoying his closeness, how he's pinning you with no effort at all, hands on your throat while he demanded an answer.
"I can't call her" you admit in a low voice, cheeks now red as the embarrassment crept upon your face — "I don't have my mother's power."
Soldier Boy seems to not believe you for a mere second, after that you can feel the blade of the knife pressing against your skin, a threat that now becomes more real as you can feel the cold metal stomach. One swift movement and you'd be stabbed without a second thought.
It's sick how much you enjoy it when you are squirming against him, goosebumps in the zone he threats to destroy.
A force pull his lips upwards in a smile, unable to pay attention to nothing else but the sound you made without even realizing it. "You like that, huh little Nightshade?"
It seems to be a joke for him, bitting your inner cheek to prevent you from saying something stupid, from letting out a moan in response to all the sudden desire.
Despite all conditions you stay silent, holding his gaze like it's a game you're not going to lose. He didn't respond either, trapped in a second that seemed longer than the usual when time stopped around you, eyes looking like he can surpass the old fabric of the white shirt you choose to wear.
It's the tension what makes you mad. You're so into getting people like him, that your ego is bruised now that you notice you are actually attracted to all of that, to the way he's pressing you against the concrete, how all falls into place when he's pushing himself against you, invading any private space you could require.
He's kissing you soon after. Ben crumbles against the tension as the hand on your throat demands a kiss now, pulling you closer to his face without any warning nor concern as he crash his lips against yours in a rough kiss. You try to push him away in response even when you don't want to; see, it's hard to even admit you have interest in Soldier Boy in any other way more than the professional, but when he's bitting your lower lip you're letting your defense down: When is the last time you've been kissed like that?
You remind yourself you're tired from work, that the CIA has done nothing for you more than fuck your over and over even to this point, losing sight of one of the most important heroes of the word, and it's making you encourage to let go just for a mere hour.
"Lookin' so good takin' a bath" he says, and the sound of his deep voice is enough to send an electric wave through your spine, like he’s talking to himself as the hand on your hip is now tracing the curves of your body, taunting you from over the shirt he now learns to love. His beard is now scraping against your skin and you can feel his lips going down, tracing an invisible path to the crook of your neck as his hand is no longer choking you.
Jesus. Was that even happening or was that your imagination? Did you feel asleep on the bathtub? Maybe it’s a reflection as you are close to drowning, your brain doing that happy thoughts shit. You’re tilting your head to the side just to give him more space to work with and you’re just letting it be, enjoying how he’s sucking and nibling on your skin to leave a red mark behind, all teeth and no fucking control as he uses a good amount of force to make you moan in the process, the pain enough to remember who’s really on charge.
Ben forgets about asking any more questions, he’s too busy when his hand are taking decisions by themselves as they slide under your shirt, body still cold from the bath you just took, water still drying in your flesh when he’s like he usually is — An invader.
His hands are big and they’re capable of holding your whole tummy as he caress the soft skin that seems to expel a warm sensation, how it leaves goosebumps in any place he touches. You remember you’re basically at his mercy now that his hands roam with all liberty under your shirt, the look he gave you in the bathroom mistaken you for Stella, his eyes looking at any exposed skin he could look at.
“What the fuck,” you try to say under your breath, to keep on this facade you have of a composed person, one that won’t give in to be manhandled “What the fuck do you think you are you doing?”
“Well, i’m not seeing any complains” The blade cuts through the cotton leaving a large hole you know you won’t be able to sew after yet he’s right: There are no complains, nothing but eager that makes him go further as the seconds passed “In fact, can see that you’re pretty much enjoying it, Doll.”
You hate the nickname, that old man way of speaking when he’s squeezing one of your breasts with more force you can even handle, cursing at how easy it seems to be for him, how he wants to see you simply destroyed.
“You’re loving this isn’t?” he ask all sudden, studying you with his hazel eyes — “You love being a good whore f’me? My little Nightshade.”
He’s hard under the suit, covered in a green material you don’t know how to call as your hand searches for him, crave for him, convincing that it's what you must do as you trace the invisible lines his muscles made.
Soldier Boy’s messy, much like an animal when he’s groaning beneath your touch, his own body seeking for yours as your fingers grew bolder, demanding for a deeper contact — “Careful there sweetheart, i’m still fresh out of the oven. May be a little rusty."
You laugh at his words cause you know what he means, yet your hands work by themselves as you barely even touch him from over the suit, the hard feeling of his cock against your palm, hips buckling against your hand seconds after seeking for you, eyes shut for a couple of seconds.
“M’being careful” you say, catching yourself stealing a look at his reaction, taking your time on pleasuring him , gulping as he experiences the torture of your touch “Taking it slow for an old man.”
“Old man, huh? Now you're talking” He teases, and the sound of his laugh just fucks you up. Maybe it has to be with the fact he’s placing two fingers in front of your lips while looking at you, swollen pink lips he’s so fixated for a second, or it’s because he is, indeed, way older than you are — “Spit.”
It’s not a command, but it sounds like one as you’re unable to disobey, quickly spitting in his hand as you can visibly see the traces of saliva leaving a wet residue in your chin, one Ben looks at it for a good amount of time: How is something like saliva is so damn erotic? He doesn’t know it, but it’s enough to send him into a spiral.
He’s strong you think, cause he’s a superhero. He’s Soldier Boy by any meaning, so it’s not a big effort to hold you in his arms and lift you in the air as you let out a gasp of surprise, spanking your ass as one of his hands separates your legs for him, holding one up as you stand in the other.
“Relax, 'got you, doll” he says, your back against the wall as he kept a bruising grip in your hip, holding you in place so you don’t have to keep your balance — “Fuck you smell so damn good.”
The roses and vanilla aroma lingers on your skin as you finally understand what he's doing now, his hand close to your cunt as he taunts you, torturing you like you did so eagerly before, his personal pet as his digits get lost in your entrance now, your folds spilled with juice he can physically feel in his fingertips, your arousal's so nice against the palm of his hand he cannot help but kiss you, a feverish desire taking over his actions, the lewd sound his fingers made when he finally pushes his digits inside of you, velvety walls welcoming him as they seemed to squeeze him already — He has made such a good job on turning you on, it’s impossible to not react when he’s finally touching you, pumping into you in a constant pace.
“Jesus fucking Christ,” he says, the look on your face is enough to make his cock twitch in his pants in response, imagination running wild as he thinks about that very same feeling in a much deeper way, how you’d look now stretched out, crying just like you did when he choked you asking for information — “Such a nice cunt, so wet f’me.”
He's looking at you, holding the image in his mind forever: Pink pussy displayed for him, white t-shirt rising over your chest, lifting your leg over his arm as his muscles flexed by the force he's using to fuck you deliberately, your lips parted as you ask for more in between erratic moans as his fingers curved inside you so he can hit that nice place he can reach with no effort at all, that one spot thats makes you moan louder.
"Ah-fuck" you let out. Ben's all about touching you for what it seems an eternity, thumb grazing against your clit when he's plainly torturing you, testing how much patience you have left now that he has full control of you.
"Don't cum," he demands, your heartbeats are louder by the seconds as he lifts you slightly, lips attacking your neck before the words escape from his mouth "Need you to come undone in my cock first."
He's leaving marks, marks you don't remember how to hide but don't bother you at all, touching you as he pleases you, taking all the time in the world cause it seems like the night belongs to him — Getting started as you shake your head in an improvised yes.
Yes. The thought is pure electricity, the sudden need to please him as you shake your head once again.
“Please Ben,” you don’t recognize what you’ve become now. “Please let me cum in your cock.”
"Go on doll, put on a show f'me" the supe says with a grin you cannot resist. "Bend and show me that lovely ass."
It’s all it takes. His fingers are now away from you, but you’re now facing the wall as you obey, bending until your cheek is pressed against the concrete and you can hear how he’s now unzipping his pants, the green fabric of his suit now to the side.
You look at him from over your shoulder, bitting the your lower lip as you check him out, his slightly curved dick pointing upwards, precum already leaking out.
“Like what you’re seeing or what?”
“Yeah, but there’s no fucking way.”
You’re feeding on his ego now, but you can’t help it when his size is far from what you consider it’s common — “Common’ doll. You can hadle it.”
You gulp in response cause you know you’re more than eager to try, just the sight of his own hand holding his lenght as he strokes himself making you drool in response. Fuck. It transforms in a need now. When he positions himself beneath you and he’s spitting down to that very place where he’s pushing against your hole, saliva coating his cock before just letting the tip inside.
Lubricated, he pushes a bit more and it feels just damn right. Even when it begans to hurt as he’s thick enough to force himself inside you.
Benjamin knows you’re in pain so he waits a second before shoving his cock inside one more time. You need some time as he stretches you out, clenching your teeth while he works.
"You're doing it s'good" he praises, hand massaging your back as he prevents himself from fucking you at his liking, “Takin' me like a champ."
"God" you let out a sharp moan moments after, crying when you felt the pain more than anything else — "Can't-"
"No doll" he hums as he pulls slightly more. “You can do this” he forces himself in until he's finally balls deep inside your cunt, letting you adjust to his size as he can feel fucking everything. Your blood flow, your velvety walls that squeeze him unused to someone as big as he was, your face distorted in what seems an intense mix of pain and pure, devastating pleasure — "Atta girl."
Strikes like lighting.
Soldier Boy's bitting your shoulder-blade as he waits, waits for it to switch into pleasure, to become intoxicating to the point you cannot longer remember your own name.
"Please move," you ask sooner than he thinks, and when he moves, you can feel it in your belly, melting your fucking brain as he repeated the process again, burying his cock as deep as he could go without any previous warning — "Ah, just like that, please-"
"Do you like how my cock is stretching you out now?" Ben's voice is way deeper than what usually is as he laughs, grunting behind you as one of his hands reach a fistful of your hair, grabbing it with force to pull your head backwards "Good girl, keep huggin' my cock."
You're drunk on the feeling, on the vibrations his voice sends every time he's saying something dirty for you, when he laughs victim of the pleasure.
"Gonna' keep you as my personal slut," he thinks out loud, pushing you against the wall every time he fucks you, using his other hand to spread one of your ass cheeks to the side so he can hit it harder. "Use you as my fucking pet so I can cum on your pretty face whenever I want."
He's moaning, your body’s sweaty as he pulls your hair without caring, not concentrated on the pain it produces as his hips continue on collide against you.
"Would you like that, little Nightshade?" he asks then in a low voice, his thumb pressing against your asshole as he fucks you harder now that you're used to his size. "Could get used to this pretty cunt. Promise to keep my cock whore nice and full."
It doesn't take long. Soldier Boy's moans are now filling the room as his pace becomes faster, slurred words between his erratic breathing when the hand on your hair comes up to finally grab you by the neck, like he can read your mind cause it's exactly what you need to get there, to experience by first hand a set of crashing waves that were getting more and more intense on your stomach.
You're close to the edge. He can smell it in the air when the sound of your skin slapping against his is loud enough to be all you can hear, mixing with the lovely moans you produce when he’s pounding into you with no mercy, fingers pressing the side of your neck with enough force you’re running out of breathe.
It’s messy, violent and you love it, love how he’s ruining you all sudden, fucking you up from the inside, making your vision turning dizzy in response. You’re immersed in the haze he’s driven you into before admiting:
“God i’m so fucking close.”
“Cum on my cock,” it sounds like he’s begging you to do it, fingers finding their way to your swollen clit to move against the sensitive flesh “Come on doll, leave me full of you.”
He’s making you move now, hands now controlling your hips as you take him as his liking, mere seconds until you’re finally crumbling, violently shaking as you finally reach your peak. He keeps on fucking you through your high, long enough so he’s pulling out all of sudden, stroking his lenght over you as his cum finally lands on your back leaving you convered with his load.
Fucking hell.
When you’re coming down from your orgasm shame seems to hit you hard, however for Ben is not enough when he’s kneeling on the floor, eyes on the mess his cock made out of you.
“Wanna go again, little Nightshade?” he asks curiously, and the question makes you laugh in response, forgetting about formalities and the trouble it meant you were intimate with Soldier Boy out of all the supes in the world.
“Hm,” you seem to think about it for a second, his breathing close to your wet pussy as he’s still wearing his clothes in contrast of you being so exposed — “But you’re keeping the suit on.”
He don’t have any complains when he’s the one pressing his face against your wet folds.
Funny thing is now when you’re forced to join the Boys days after that very encounter — A bad joke when you’re now babysitting Soldier Boy himself.
“Been missing you s’much little Nightshade” he admits after a couple of minutes alone in the filthy motel “Thinking about how cute you are, how you felt taking my cock so nicely in your living room.”
“Fuck off, Ben.”
“We’ll be quick” he promises “That stupid assholes back there wont even notice.”
You seem to think about it for a second before lifting your middle finger in response — “I said fuck off, Ben.”
For now, it’s enough for him that you’re thinking about it.
my masterlist
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cxrsed-angel · 1 year ago
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Cheer Skirt Misap: Hazel Callahan x Reader Smut
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word count: 1k
summary: Hazel finds your new cheer uniform attractive. Particularly the skirt and how short it is.
Warnings: Oral (r receiving), Hazel is an ass girl, slight spanking, hazel doing sexual activities when’s she probably shouldn’t be. After that fight. Reader is more feminine. 18+ MDNI
A/N: I watch bottoms 2 months ago and i haven’t stopped thinking about her and ruby cruz since, so here’s this. Also reader is a cheerleader. I wish I could come up with a clever title. Also Hazel gives me service top vibes.
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Hazel is sitting on your bed. She’s trying to listen to whatever you are talking about, but she can’t focus on anything besides how hot you look in your new cheer skirt. The skirt is white with blue and red on the bottom, falling just above your thigh. You had gotten the new uniforms for the big game against Huntington. She watches you move around your room, getting ready for the game, her eyes lingering on your legs and how short the new cheer skirt seemed compared to the old ones. 
“Pj was such a dick the other day. I mean, saying that about your mom was so out of line, babe, and I mean, you didn’t make a fake fight club to have sex with cheerleaders. You actually cared about female solidarity and everything. And you’re literally dating a cheerleader on your own accord without lying-“
You pause your rant about PJ, turn around, and see Hazel sitting in your bed, staring at the lower half of your body. It’s clear she isn’t paying attention. You walk closer to your bed and see her bruised face from the fight at the pep rally. You frown, knowing she probably had some sort of concussion that was making it hard to focus.
“Hazel? Hazel, are you okay…do you need to lie down? Am I talking too fast?”
Hazel looks up at you with her blue eyes bruised black and purple, but they’re still big and bright as she looks at you. 
“I-um, no, I was just thinking about something else.” 
You sit beside her on your bed, your thighs touching hers in her black jeans. Hazel's eyes linger on your upper thighs again before tearing her eyes away. She feels her heart beating faster in her chest, trying not to stare at your legs, trying to ignore the ache in between her thighs. She feels a bit guilty being so turned on as you look at her, so worried and concerned. 
“Oh? Thinking about what?” You see Hazel look a bit flustered at your question, and you relax a bit. You could tell it wasn't something bad, but you were still intrigued about what was on her mind. 
“Um. I was just thinking about you and how you look cute in your cheer skirt,” she tells you the truth partially, slightly nervous and embarrassed to admit that your skirt had turned her on so much. 
You smile at the compliment. “Oh, thanks, babe! We got new cheer uniforms since it's like the biggest game ever, but they are a bit shorter.” You get off your bed and look at the skirt through your mirror. It’s a few inches shorter than your usual cheer skirt. You thought you got the wrong size at first, but they just ended up being that short. “I'm glad we were shorts underneath, or I would literally flash the crowd.” 
Hazel smiles, laughing a bit at your comment, eyes still gazing at your lower half. “Well, it looks really good on you. Maybe shorter skirts make you more aerodynamic, help you fly up higher or something.” 
 Hazel suggests innocently when she knows thats probably not the reason your skirt is so short it's almost showing your ass considering your team’s pep rally performance.  You laugh a bit, smiling at her reasoning. 
“I really don't think that’s the reason, baby.” 
She toys with the bottom of your skirt lightly as she continues. “No, I think it is! Maybe it could help with the-the air and going up and-and flips and stuff because there less..fabric?” 
Hazle tries to justify but fails, making you laugh more. You find her attempt cute, though. Her blue eyes linger on your thighs again, gazing at them before she pulls you onto her lap by your hips, quickly kissing your lip-glossed lips suddenly. You suck in a sharp breath at the unexpected kiss, closing your eyes and melting against her the familiar feeling of her lips. You feel Hazel’s hands grasp your hips tighter as she kisses your lips, pressing against each other. Your arms go around her neck.
You break apart from the kiss slightly, looking at the playful smile on her lips and her face flushed and red, her eyes wide as she looks back. You can tell she’s turned on, and if her gaze didn’t give it away, her hands creeping up under the skirt did. 
“You’re really happy over these aerodynamic skirts, huh?” you smile at her, knowing that was not the reason she couldn’t keep her hands off you. You could tell it was because of how the shorts showed off your legs and a bit of your ass. 
Hazel pulls you against her passionately. Your lips crash together, kissing you again. She pulls you by your hips back on top of her. You feel her hands lightly moving down your back. She can’t keep her hands off of you, but you move your lips off slowly as you realize how things are progressing. You stare at Hazel, hesitant when you remember.  
“Hazel…are you sure you can do…more strenuous activities? You know you were beat up pretty badly, babe.” you look concerned as you sit up, moving off of her. You move off from on top of her and sit back on your bed. 
She nods excitedly like there is no problem, like she didn’t get the shit kicked out of her the other day and is perfectly okay. 
“Yeah, I’m fine, it’s fine. I’m like almost 100% better anyways.” Hazel tries to sound sure, but you can tell she isn’t. You nod, still not fully unconvinced. You saw the fight and know she had taken quite a beating, and the last thing you wanna do is make it worse by having sex. 
You pause, thinking for a moment before speaking again. “Babe, I really don’t think we should be doing anything. Plus, we have to be at the football game in like an hour.” Hazel nods, pouting her lip a bit as she thinks. You watch her fidget with her silver rings as she thinks of a solution, clearly not taking no for an answer. 
“Oh! Wait, wait, I got it.” Hazel looks excited, her blue eyes excited. She lays down on your bed. “I’ll just eat you out.” You pause, thinking for a few minutes about her solution,  
“I don’t know Hazel…what about you-”
 She cuts you off, hungrily kissing your lips as they press against hers. She cups your cheek and slips her tongue in your mouth. You melt instantly, feeling that warm feeling you get every time you kiss. After making out for a few minutes, you feel her pull away, your head a bit dizzy from the kiss.
“Please let me eat your pretty pussy. I promise I’ll be fine,” Hazel begs as she looks at you, slowly rubbing circles on your hips. Her words go straight to your core, turning you on.  
You look at her and give in, unable to resist her big blue eyes. “Fine, but you’re stopping the second you get dizzy or something feels off.” Hazel nods as her grip on your waist tightens as she looks up at you excitedly. 
She pulls your black lacey underwear from under your cheer skirt and throws them somewhere off in your room. You lean down and cup her face with her face, your lips crushing onto hers again, making out. Hazel moves her hands down, lightly squeezing your ass. Her lips linger, touching against yours as she looks up at you. 
You move, placing your hips over her face. You look at her as she stares back excitedly. You slowly lower yourself on her lips and waste no time licking around your wet and puffy folds. She licks along your lips slowly, and you gasp at the feeling of her tongue. She continues moving her tongue as you try to hold your hips, trying not to thrust them, Hazel’s injuries still in the back of your mind. You moan out her name as she sucks on your clit. 
“Fuck Hazel, please don't stop.” you close your eyes, grabbing the side of her sheets and slowly rolling your hips against her lips. 
She grips your ass under your cheer skirt, squeezing it. Her tongue slips inside your entrance, and your moan grows louder as her motions speed up slightly, eating you out like she’s starved. Your face grows hotter as you feel the arousal building; you feel yourself getting wetter under her touch. She places a smack on your ass, and you moan, not expecting to like it as much as you did.  
“Fuck, baby! I'm close!-yes, right there! Fuck Hazel!” 
Your back arch letting out a breathy moan as your orgasm gets closer. You thrust, moving your hips faster as she swirls her tongue around your swollen clit. You feel yourself coming undone as your orgasm hits. Cumming around Hazel’s lips. You breathe deeply and slowly move from on top of her, sitting in your bed. Hazel sits up, her chin wet and lips swollen. 
You look at her, wiping your wetness off her lips. “How do you feel? Are you dizzy, or do you have a headache?” 
Hazel smiles and shakes her head. You nod, still catching your breath. You feel her hand on your thigh, rubbing it softly, feeling her cold rings on your skin. 
“Yes, I’m fine; never been better.” She beams, happy from her previous activities. You kiss her lightly before standing up to finish getting ready for the game against Huntington. Hazel leans against her arms, watching you in your bed. 
“But after I feel better, I’m gonna have to fuck you in that skirt.” you turn around at her words, a bit shocked at how bluntly she put it. 
“Oh? You are. And eating me out while I'm wearing it isn't enough?” Hazel shakes her head lightly. 
“No. I mean, it's good enough for right now, but the thought of watching you bounce on my strap in that cute little skirt is making me feel a bit foggy and extremely turned on.” 
You nod as you return to putting on your makeup for the game. “Well, get a doctor’s note, and we can make that happen.”  
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hellfire--cult · 10 months ago
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Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader
wc: 10.1k
HEAVY TRIGGER WARNINGS: +18, suicide attempt, reader is suicidal, PAS (Physician Assisted Suicide), neglectful parents, weed and alcohol, feelings of loneliness, hurt/comfort (?), fluff, kissing, some mentions of nausea, smut implication, angst. So much angst.
Plot: Eddie was new to the group, and he connected with you after an unfortunate event. You were excited to finally put an end to your suffering, of all those years of feeling nothing, and you had made a list of things to do before going.
a/n: I cannot stress this enough, please, do not read if this will be triggering for you. If you read PAST the warnings, it is your own responsibility, and I will not hold myself accountable for it.
This is somewhat inspired by the movie and book Me Before You. So yeah, have fun.
Always reblog your artists, likes don't do much.
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Please, Trust Me
Eddie came into the group a little bit late, so to speak.
He was assigned to do a project alongside Steve Harrington in Psychology class. College was just something Eddie wanted to focus on studying since he had a reputation of repeating his senior year two times in a row, but Steve was friendly. Eddie, well, he didn’t realize how badly he needed social interaction until then.
So Steve introduced him to his group. Robin Buckley, Nancy Wheeler, Jonathan Byers, and you. Now, Eddie got to know everyone, except yourself. As Nancy put it, you were in many extracurricular classes, so your time was limited. Eddie, of course, understood, but he also felt you were scared of him somehow. You always averted your gaze from him in the little moments you spent together, so he gave up on trying to talk further with you.
Holidays were approaching, and Eddie had the opportunity that his uncle was leaving the nice house he finally got to purchase near lover’s lake in Hawkins, his hometown, so he thought it would be a great idea to invite everyone over… Well, not everyone.
Since he thought you were scared of him, he believed the invitation would be rejected, but everyone else agreed to come over to his place. It was just a two-hour drive, and he couldn’t wait to get drunk and high with everyone else.
Robin told him that you didn’t have time anyway to assist, seeing that you were going to visit your mother for Christmas, so Eddie’s guilt vanished completely. He felt horrible for not inviting you, that’s why he asked Robin to ask you about your plans for Christmas.
So off they went, having a great time by the lake, drinking beer, eating grilled burgers and sausages, and then on Christmas night, the fireworks went off, and everyone was already drunk by that time, messaging loved ones and wishing them great holidays.
The next day, you called Robin, wishing her a happy Christmas. Eddie was packing the suitcase to go back to Indianapolis, when he overheard Robin tell you that they were spending New years there too, completely surprising him. He expected to return on the 26th, but he was excited to spend more time with his friends. Once again, you told Robin that it was fine since you were still at your mom’s.
And so, new years went by. Now on the 2nd of January, they all finally returned completely drained from all the alcohol and food, but still with smiles on their faces. Robin then turned to Eddie with an innocent smile on her face as she sat on the passenger’s seat.
“Eds, can you drive me to Y/N’s place? I want to show her the rocks we picked up at the lake, and I will likely stay the night at her apartment.” She batted her eyelashes at him and he rolled his own eyes.
“Okay, let’s take you to the rich girl’s place.” You explained to the group that you weren’t good with a roommate, so you rented a place near the campus to live in until your studies finished. Eddie realized you weren’t a middle-class person just by knowing that, and he doesn’t know why you would choose a college like this one instead of Harvard or something like that, as rich people do in movies.
Robin met you thanks to you being signed up to tutor her in a particular class she was struggling with. She and you immediately clicked, despite you acting a bit shy and reserved at first, as if not trusting Robin at all, like a scared animal in the wild meeting another species.
Once they arrived at your apartment complex, Robin once more looked at Eddie with a pouty lip.
“And help me with my bag? My shoulders hurt from swimming all week…” And once more, Eddie rolled his eyes, sighing as the two of them got out of his van and he went to the back to get hold of her bag, swinging it over his shoulder.
“You can just say you are lazy as fuck Buckley.” She giggled at his response and they both walked into the reception, calling the elevator to go up to your floor. Once they were at your door, Robin knocked a few times, only to be met with no response. Her smile faded slightly and she tried again, and once more, met with silence.
“Maybe she didn’t return from her mom’s.” And she bent down to look under your mat, finding the spare key. You told her she was welcome at any time, to simply look under the mat for the key and make herself comfortable, knowing Robin likes some quiet away from the dorms now and then. 
She opened the door–
“Hey, you–”
And she and Eddie immediately winced at the strong smell of unwashed dishes or something of the sort. 
“Jesus Christ, what is that smell? Did she forget to wash the dishes before leaving?” Eddie replied, looking over at the kitchen counter, his eyes furrowing together as he looked at a particular tray that was filled with gingerbread men cookies. They were all with a bit of fungus, and one had been bitten, one of its arms missing.
Robin closed the door behind her as she looked around, finding that there were bottles of different alcoholic beverages on the sink, a cup of ramen noodles on the coffee table in front of the TV, half-eaten, and then she spotted the small Christmas tree in the corner of the room.
She remembers how excited you were, buying your tree, telling her that you never had the chance of decorating one before because it wasn’t truly celebrated in your household. Dread immediately invaded her as she remembered that, slowly walking towards it and Eddie following behind, dropping Robin’s bag to the floor.
Robin gasped as she kneeled to the floor, finding different presents under the tree, one for each person in the group, including Eddie. His heart plummeted to the floor as Robin showed him the small present, and you didn’t even know what he liked, yet you bought something for him. 
Robin then turned while getting up, looking towards the door of your bedroom that was shut. She rushed towards it and she felt her heart starting to want to come out of her mouth as she swung it open as quickly as she could.
And there you were, in your bed, resting, and Robin felt herself breathe in relief, but Eddie didn’t. Not when he noticed the bottle of wine next to you, on your nightstand. 
“Maybe she didn’t think she was gonna go to her mom’s and she forgot about the cookies.” Robin said as if almost trying to convince herself. Trying to make a reasonable explanation other than the most horrible one that she could think of because of course, she doubted it when you said you were visiting your mom.
Because you mentioned to her that you two weren’t close.
Eddie slowly walked towards you, not caring about the smell that lingered in your room, knowing that you probably hadn’t showered or cleaned the place in a while. He looked down on you, tilting his head. You had the blankets all over you while you rested on your belly, eyes completely closed. 
He raised a hand towards your face, under your nose, and his breathing stopped. Your breaths were slow, not even deep, and you were drooling, all over your pillow. He grabbed onto the edge of the blanket and Robin moved to stop him, yet he yanked it off. 
“Robin… call 911.”
But Robin was frozen as she looked at your frame, her lip starting to shake as she inspected your right hand. A hand that was holding something that looked empty. Something that she saw was half full the last time she came over.
That orange flask that contained your sedatives.
And you chugged them down with alcohol.
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Steve was rubbing Robin’s back as she sobbed into her hands, hunched over the chair of the waiting room. Eddie was on her other side, his leg bouncing up and down as he bit his nails. One day he was laughing with everyone and now he is waiting for some good news regarding your health, someone he barely knows, yet he is worried shitless for.
Loud heels were heard across the hallway, a woman in her late 40’s, wearing designer clothes, looking rather stern as she got closer to the door of the room you are in. Her arms are crossed as she stands next to it, tapping her heel on the floor, catching the attention of the three people sitting on the chairs.
“Excuse me?” Robin’s weak voice called out and the lady snapped her head towards her with an eyebrow raised up.
“Yes?”
“Who are you?” 
“I am this girl’s mother. Who are you?”
And the three friends froze in their seats. It was your mother. The person you supposedly spent the holidays with, yet, she didn’t look concerned for you, but rather she looked angry, or disappointed.
“We– We’re her friends.” Robin replied with a small voice, because could she even say that? Do you deserve someone like her as a friend? Even as a partner? Someone who forgets what you told them almost a year ago? The woman scoffed, shaking her head.
“Friends? That is surprising. Were you there when she did this?” Her voice was cold, and anger started filling inside of Eddie’s chest. Why is she acting this way when her child is inside that room, fighting for her life? A life she almost took herself?
“N-No, we found her like that…” Robin looked back down again and Eddie could only look at her wrecked face with pity, yet, he could not comfort her. 
“I see. Did the doctor come out or something yet? I have somewhere to be, and I cannot waste my time on this. Not again.”
And the three sitting people shot up from their seats, all with alarmed looks on their faces.
“I’m sorry… again?” Robin asked, the answer scaring her yet she needed to know what it meant. She needed to know if she was an even more horrible person than she was ten seconds ago. Your mother scoffed, shaking her head again and Eddie’s hands turned into fists.
“It’s the third time. I already sent her to a psychiatrist, a mental hospital, and therapists, and yet she still tries. That girl has everything, and yet she always craves attention this way. I’m sick of it.”
And Robin wanted to puke, right then and there, while Steve looked at Eddie with tear-filled eyes and the metalhead could see how bad his friend felt. How evil he must feel. Steve gulped and looked back at your mother, clearing his throat to be able to talk.
“W-Why would she do this?” And your mother scoffed, looking for her phone in her purse as she talked.
“Just because I forgot about the holidays and her birthday. I already sent her a message apologizing and telling her she could ask for anything she wanted, but she went and did this.”
And Robin froze. 
Birthday. 
December 28th.
Your birthday. 
And she couldn’t handle it anymore, yanking herself away from Steve to rush towards the toilet. Steve called out to her, rushing to her aid as tears rolled down his cheeks and Eddie was frozen in place.
Not only did you spend the holidays alone, but you also spent your birthday by yourself, while they were all having fun in Hawkins, shooting fireworks and drinking alcohol to their heart's content. And you were alone, with a bottle of wine and instant noodles.
He was about to talk to your mother, about to insult her, to drag her on the floor, but the opening of the door in front of him made him stop in his tracks as the doctor walked out with a board in his hand.
“Okay, so, we got her blood cleaned up. It’s good that you caught her at such an early stage. Her vital signs look stable now, but she will have to stay here for a few days, two tops, so we can monitor her a bit more.” Your mother cleared her throat and the doctor looked up at her with a tilt of his head.
“So, she’s okay.” And there was such coldness in your mother’s voice that Eddie felt his vile rising in his throat. The doctor only sighed, taking his glasses off.
“She is, but we cannot overlook a suicide attempt. Does she have anyone to talk to? Maybe I can give you brochures for–”
“I already sent her to an institution once, but it didn't work. That child is an attention seeker, pay it no mind.” 
Eddie’s eyes were burning in anger at her words and the doctor looked as surprised and hurt as he did. He cannot bear to hear your mother’s words any longer, so little care, with lack of empathy and lack of love. He wondered how many things you endured with a woman like this in your life, and honestly, he was afraid of finding out.
“W-Well, since you’re the mother, maybe you should–”
“She is a grown woman now. She can make her own decisions as you can see. I shall not worry about her anymore.” And just like that, the heels echoed in the hallway once more and Eddie’s eyes were wide as he looked at her retreating figure. A mother leaving her child after they tried to end their life, like no care in the world, as if she hadn’t given them their life to begin with.
Three times? Three times she did this? Walking away from you? How could she call you an attention seeker? How could she even acknowledge something like that when you were screaming for help?
“Ahem.”
Eddie blinked as he looked towards the doctor who had a confused yet pained look on his face.
“She is awake if you want to see her. I assume you are a friend of hers?” 
Is he? He is not a friend, but you cannot be alone, not here, not right now. Robin is probably trying to breathe while Steve is comforting her, but maybe… Eddie knows you probably don’t want to see them either. None of that group. So he gave the doctor a nod, and he slowly opened the door of the white room.
His eyes scanned it, and finally, they landed on you. Your arms were connected to an IV and a blood transfusion bag, the heart rate monitor beeping right next to you as your back rested against the pillows, letting you sit on the bed. You looked emotionless. Eyes empty. Hand on each side of your body and Eddie knew your mind, your feelings, were completely shut off. 
He gulped with nerves and the door closed behind him, making him wince, but it alarmed you that someone came into the room, making you look up. Your eyes twitched in surprise, yet if you were, you didn’t express it, nor show it. 
“I guess you’re the one that found me?” Your voice was empty, with no tone, as if it were a recording or an AI robot. Eddie slowly nodded as he took a few steps toward the chair that was on the other side of the bed. 
“Robin and I found you.” You gave a slow nod, looking back down to your lap. He didn’t know what to say, he didn’t know anything about you but he feels like he should have. He cleared his throat to continue talking. “I, uh, liked the necklace you got me. Pretty metal.” He winced at his words because it was something he shouldn’t have brought up at all.
Your eyes raised to meet his, another nod going towards his way, diverting your eyes back to your lap. He looked around for a second, the nerves all over his body. He was almost trembling with the need to talk to you, but what can he say? What could be something you want to hear right now? And coming from him?
“Ask away.” He startled at your voice, jumping on his seat as he looked at you once more.
“What?”
“I know you want to ask. And maybe you can also help me by telling the rest about it and how I am not going to talk to them again.” You were still not looking at him and he cleared his throat as he felt his mouth going dry, but now he knew you weren’t going to talk to the others about this. The relationship is already broken inside of you.
“I– Okay, um… I guess the first question is, why?” He slowly asked, afraid of even being able to talk to you about this, but sometimes they say that a stranger is the best listener, and maybe Eddie was just that.
“Why… Only child, homeschooled all my life so no interaction whatsoever with the world, absent mother, holidays and birthdays by myself, father was never found. Need to say more?”
And shit, Eddie was not expecting that at all. You had been miserable from the very beginning, unwanted by your own mother, and now he realized how horrible you must have felt with the whole group. Your first ever friends and they forgot every single detail of you. How you never spent a holiday with people, and was so excited you even baked cookies to share and bought presents for a gift exchange, your first ever most likely, only to never happen.
And now, he realized that… His other friends do not deserve any kind of pity, or forgiveness.
“Okay, then… Why were you scared of me?” At his question, your eyebrow raised up, and turned your head to look at him.
“Is that what you thought?” You asked with complete confusion in her tone. He looked at you with his own frown, tilting his head.
“Well yeah, you avoided me like the plague…” And you looked up at the ceiling, closing your eyes, and shaking your head with a sigh.
“No. I don’t trust people easily as you can see.” You looked down at your lap once again and he wanted to sigh a little bit in relief at that, knowing that his clothes or his whole demeanor didn’t actually scare her. She was just shy and probably nervous.
“Right… Um, Robin and Steve are here as well, do you want me to–”
“No. I don’t want to see them.” And your words spoke for your pain, and Eddie was not going to argue against it. They honestly didn’t deserve your forgiveness or kindness, that much he knew, but he also felt guilty. Really guilty.
“I– I am sorry… I didn’t invite you because I really thought you hated me– and I took everyone away, I didn’t know any of this, I am so sorry if I knew–”
“You weren’t the one who forgot. You don’t know me, but they did.” He gave you a nod in understanding, yet the guilt is still lingering in his stomach. He cleared his throat and he wanted to ease the tension for you, to relieve the somber moment that filled the room.
“So uh, you knew I liked Metallica huh? Is it because of the hundreds of shirts that I own?” Your eyebrow raised at him and you turned to face him while he gave you a cheeky smile of his own. You squinted slightly at him, but a small tug on the corner of your lips gave you away.
“Well yeah, all the times I’ve seen you it was either Metallica or Black Sabbath. It had to be one of the two.”
“What if I only liked their logos, huh?” At that, you rolled your eyes at him, but he kept making jokes at you, and a giggle here and there could be heard in the room. 
Robin and Steve were hearing the both of you outside your room. They looked at each other for a minute before hesitantly walking away. Robin turned her head at almost every step, wanting to barge into the room to hug you, to say she was sorry. But she knew it meant nothing, not anymore, and not ever again.
What she did, what they did, cannot be fixed.
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Eddie was lounging with his headphones on as he listened to music while resting against a tree trunk. He was bobbing his head as he wrote some lyrics on the notebook he had over his leg. For the past three days, he hasn’t heard of you. He tried visiting you yesterday only to find out you were discharged and he felt too embarrassed to just go to your apartment.
He had also distanced himself from the group. It didn’t sit right to be with people who could easily forget about something so important like a birthday. You didn’t have any social media, so the least they could do is put the birthday in their own cell phones, like Eddie did as soon as he left the hospital.
It’s not like he didn’t talk to them, he just made excuses when they asked to hang out with him. He just couldn’t shake off the bad vibes from it all. 
He looked up from his lap only for his eyes to bulge out of his skull as he saw you almost prancing in happiness while walking through campus. That’s a good sign, isn’t it? He immediately put his notebook into his backpack and pulled his headphones down, resting them around his neck. He got up, almost tripping as he did so, as he rushed towards you.
“Hey! Hey!” He yelled at you to catch your attention as he got closer. You turned to face him, still with a wide smile on your face.
“Hi, Eddie.” You were smiling, that’s good, that’s really good. He was almost breathing heavily from the run he just did. He wasn’t athletic and the smoking surely doesn’t do him any good.
“Yeah– I just– give me a minute.” He huffed as he tried taking a deep breath in, and you giggled motioning to him to sit on a bench near the both of you. You sat down as soon as he plopped down, taking another huff of air as he turned his head to look at you. “So, what got you all smiley?”
“Well, I just dropped out of college!” You announced with a smile and jazz hands, startling Eddie completely. His face was contorted in confusion and wonder.
“What? Why? You didn’t like what you were studying?” You shook your head as you looked at the horizon, not anything in particular.
“It’s just pointless now.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I’m going to California in three months.” Your head turned to look at him still with a smile on your face. “I’ve been offered P.A.S.” 
He frowned, not knowing what those syllables meant at all. He tried putting them together in his head but nothing was coming up.
“What’s that?”
And Eddie didn’t know why you opened up to him with that. He didn’t know why he didn’t care that you did. He didn’t know why this relationship between the two of you evolved in this manner, as quickly as it did… but he never expected to hear the response you gave him.
“Physician Assisted Suicide.”
And now, Eddie knew that term, and his eyes bulged out of his skull. You were… offered that? How can that happen? You had no health issues to go through something like that, so why would you consider that? Why would the doctors even consider that for you? His heart was just hammering in his chest as dread invaded his gut.
“W-What? Why– how?” He was speechless, not really knowing what he was asking or what he wanted to know at this point. He felt his gut turning at the information like he couldn’t believe someone as young as yourself could even consider that way out. 
“Well, it was due to all my medical records, be it psychological and physical. My mindset never changed.” Your gaze turned from him to nothingness once more. “I go, get help, only to get out and for everything to be the same. It never changes, because it was never me who had to change.”
Eddie slowly blinked at your wording and his eyes drifted to the sky as his thoughts raced through his mind. Can he even talk you out of this? How can he even do that? You seem happy, way too happy with this solution… You were excited.
“You’re not… scared?”
“No. Not at all. I am ready to go. My heart can barely handle it anymore.” And Eddie’s eyes turned towards the profile of your face. You had made your decision clear, and he wouldn’t be able to stop you now. No one can. The group was no longer part of your life, your mother didn’t care about your decision so it seems… and he is no one to stop you.
“Alright… You– um, what are you gonna do until… you know, then?” He asked and you smiled at him, grabbing your backpack to take out your notebook, and flipping a page to show him a list, which made him frown in confusion.
“These are things I never tried because the opportunity never presented itself. Before, I didn’t know–” You cut your voice short at what you were about to say, and then you continued. “Now that I know when it’s gonna happen, I don’t want to go with any regrets.” 
Eddie looked at the list, and he couldn’t believe… how trivial some of these things were. 
- Go to an amusement park
- Smoke a cigarette
- Buy a Barbie Dreamhouse
- Eat a cake for breakfast
- Get high
And then he saw more complicated ones.
- Go skydiving
- Learn to drive (or attempt)
- Try to skateboard
- Ride on a jet ski
- Attempt to make a rainbow cake
And so many more. You had filled an entire page with things you wanted to do and he looked up at you to see you looking up at the sky with a smile on your lips.
“I think I should get the Barbie Dreamhouse first. Oh, maybe get some alcohol, I never got fully drunk, but maybe tonight I can since I don’t have to wake up early anymore–” And you went on with your plans and Eddie was just staring at you as the thoughts ran through his brain.
Everyone else was walking all around the two of you, and nobody knew that you were going to die in three months. No one knew you had made an entire bucket list with things to do before going. No one knew about this decision of yours, and he wasn’t going to let you be alone in this. He doesn’t want you to live these last few weeks with no one at your side.
“You know, or I can make one of your wishes on the list come true.” Your head snapped towards him with a surprised look on your face.
“Oh, what?” And a smirk formed on Eddie’s lips.
“Getting high.”
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“Did you prepare the pan?”
“Uh…” 
“Eddie!”
He immediately rushed to grab onto the pan as he burst into giggles thanks to the weed in his system. The munchies came to life with you two after smoking a whole joint from Eddie’s stash. You had the open bag of pizza rolls in your hands, the oven already turned on as you waited for Eddie to put some oil spray on the pan.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I just– I was stuck looking at the wall.” He simply replied to you, making you burst into laughter, trying not to let the pizza rolls fall to the ground. He followed you with chuckles as he sprayed the pan and handed it to you so you could throw the pizza rolls on it and then begin cooking them in the oven.
You were relaxed, that much Eddie knew, and he was smiling as you tip-toed in a dance towards your couch, plopping down. He followed soon after, sitting next to you. You giggled as you stared at the ceiling.
“I feel like I’m on a cloud.” Eddie stared at your profile for a while before he began talking once more.
“I wanna help.”
“Hmm?” You turned to face him still with a dopey smile on your face.
“I want to help you complete some things on your list.” 
And your smile fell as if becoming sober out of nowhere. Eddie then gulped but his resolution was already said and you moved uncomfortably in your place.
“You don’t have to pity me. I can do these–”
“No, you can’t. Learning to drive a car? How do you plan to do that?” At that, you opened and closed your mouth many times and then cleared your throat.
“An instructor!” Eddie rolled his eyes at that, and put his hand up, his fingers up.
“Getting drunk, you need supervision.” He put a finger down. “Going to a concert, you’re gonna get squashed.” He put another one down. “Playing Mortal Kombat, you need an enemy.” He put another and then you stopped him completely, shoving his hand down.
“Okay, okay, okay! I see your stupid point.” You sighed as you threw your head back against the headrest of the couch, looking at your ceiling. He knew you were overthinking it, but he honestly wanted to help you in any way he could. 
“C’mon, there are a few things in your list I am dying to try too. Like– Eating Argentinian food. I never tried that shit, I bet it’s fucking delicious.” You giggled at his expression and then nodded at him.
“Okay, fine. You can help. You will also help me bake that stupid rainbow cake I always wanted to try.” He laughed at that with a shake of his head.
“Another thing I never did in my life was bake. It’s gonna be a journey. Do you have insurance here? We might burn it all down.” At that you punched his shoulder lightly, causing him to laugh it out followed by your giggle. 
And what a journey it was gonna be.
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“Seriously, YOU DIDN’T HAVE TO GET ME INTO THIS TOO!” Eddie almost screamed as he looked out the window of the helicopter with a frightened look on his face. Harnesses were all around his body, a man behind him strapping himself closer to Eddie’s back.
You were in front of him, holding your laughter as you held onto a handle on the side of the big machine that was now miles and miles above the ground. The helmets on both of your heads almost crushed your skulls but the protection was needed. Another man was strapping himself to you behind your back.
“Oh come on! You wanted to try new things!” You yelled at him so he could hear you over the loud sound of the helicopter.
“Yes! BUT NOT SKYDIVING! I WAS HAPPY TO WAIT FOR YOU WITH EARTH BENEATH MY FEET!” He yelled back and you were trying really hard to contain your laughter. Suddenly the big door next to the both of you slid open and the wind immediately pushed your body and Eddie’s back from the force but the guys remained still as they held onto the handles above the door.
“You guys ready!?” The one behind you asked and Eddie rolled his eyes behind the goggles.
“DO I HAVE A FUCKING CHOICE?”
“Nope.” The guy behind him said before jumping out with no warning, dragging Eddie with him, and then the guy strapped to you followed close behind. You were screaming your lungs out, and Eddie was shrieking. The adrenaline of falling was making him feel butterflies in his belly, almost making him feel sick.
He can hear you closer now and he raised his head to see you in front of him with your arms splayed out and reaching out for him. He could hear your laughter through your screaming and he reached out, fighting the strong wind, to finally lock his hands with yours as you two were freefalling towards the ground. 
He couldn’t help but smile and cheer out from how extreme the whole situation was. He didn’t know how you weren’t hungover, you had gotten yourself as drunk as possible yesterday night while dancing to his music. He showed you how to headbang properly, and he took care of you when you started letting the contents out in the toilet.
He held your hands as tightly as possible, your fingers intertwined with his, as you both yelled with excitement and fear as you plummeted down and down. You only separated when the men behind your backs tapped on your sides so they could pull the parachute open. 
Your bodies jerked as you started floating in the sky, and Eddie was left laughing as you both glided downwards towards the ground again. He could see the entire city and the fields as you both kept coming down. He turned his head to see you laughing as well, your head looking up at the sky in bliss and he felt his heart tug on him slightly. 
Once you two touched earth again, Eddie let the air out of his lungs with relief and the guy behind him unstrapped himself so Eddie could catch a proper breath, taking the goggles and helmet off. You followed a few seconds later, walking towards him with a smile on your face and taking your goggles off.
“It wasn’t so bad, was it?” You were breathing heavily and he scoffed at you with a shake of his head, flicking his fingers on your forehead.
“I won’t let you drag me into something like this ever again.” 
You laughed at him and you both walked back to Eddie’s van after you paid for the experience. You didn’t let Eddie pay at all, since you dragged him into it. He was going to invite you for dinner though, and you wanted McDonalds, so he was driving back towards town as you two talked in the van.
“So, you never told me about your parents.” You blurted out, catching him by surprise, but you were indeed right. He gripped his steering wheel a little tighter, but he kept a small smile on his face.
“Oh, where to begin? My mother died when I was young and my Father was… very abusive, and often dragged me into stealing with him. He got caught and he’s been in jail for a while now, he’s charged with robbery and homicide attempt.” He took a big gulp in as he kept driving, not used to letting people into his life in this way. “But, my uncle Wayne took me in at fifteen. He is the father figure my father failed to be.”
You were silent as you listened to him. He didn’t hear anything from you so he turned to face you, only to see you looking at him with tears running down your cheeks. He wondered what was going on in your head at that point. He was about to ask you what was wrong and you sniffled, wiping the tears away with the back of your hand.
“I’m– sorry, I shouldn’t have asked that.” You said regretfully and he instantly shook his head.
“No, no… don’t worry. I’m past it.” He was worried about what you were thinking about at the moment since you remained silent for a while.
“I’m a little jealous to be honest… You had someone that…” And he waited for you to continue, but when you didn’t, he pressed forward.
“Someone that what?”
“Wanted you.”
And his heart broke at that, immediately so, and he knew his eyes started burning from the incoming tears and he shook his head to keep focused on driving. You didn’t need him to cry, you didn’t need that. 
But should he tell you what he thinks? Should he tell you what has been on his mind for the past month that he helped you tick things off your list?
“I–”
“Oh! Before I forget–” You looked through your purse, pulling out your phone as you started scrolling, and he frowned as he tried to look at what you were doing and then back at the road. You giggled and moved away so he couldn’t see. “No peeking!”
“Oh come on, you can’t just do that and not expect me to be anxious!” He laughed as he kept his gaze on the road and then he saw light in his peripheral vision and he looked quickly to see you were showing your phone to him. He switched from the road and to your phone but he couldn’t quite read it. “What’s that?”
“You know how one of the things was to go to a concert?” He nodded and you giggled, putting your phone down again. “I got us two tickets to go see Megadeth!” 
His jaw could just fall from his skull at this point as he tried to focus on driving and not the shock from those news. Did you say Megadeth? Are you serious? Eddie has been dying to see them live but when he got into the virtual line they got sold out in just a few seconds. 
“What?!” He yelled and you kicked your feet on your seat as you stared down at the phone. He was speechless, a smile spreading on his face, only for it to fall back down. “Wait, do you even LIKE Megadeth!?”
“Well, I haven’t heard much, BUT YOU LIKE THEM, and I assumed that we should go to a concert we both can enjoy. I doubt you want to go to a Taylor Swift concert.” You replied with a wiggle of your eyebrows only for him to scoff.
“Taylor Swift has some sick songs. But– Yes, I do prefer Megadeth sweetheart.” He smiled widely at you and then looked back at the road, cheering as he hit the steering wheel with excitement. “Fuck yeah!”
You were laughing on the passenger’s seat and Eddie was smiling all the while as realization started to dawn on him that… he may like something more than Megadeth’s music.
It was a special kind of tune.
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“Seriously, how long are you gonna take darling, we had to go like yesterday!” Eddie yelled with a pissed-off tone as he paced in your living room. 
“It’s my first time wearing something like this, it needs to be perfect!” He heard you yell from the bathroom and he sighed, but a smile was splayed on his lips. He was looking out the window as he waited for you in his Megadeth tank top with a black leather jacket on top. He heard the bathroom click open and he sighed in relief, turning around with a roll of his eyes.
“Finally–” And his breath was knocked out of his lungs. Your hair was messy, completely batted, wearing heavy black makeup on your eyes, strong lipstick on your lips, a black top with a black long-sleeved fishnet shirt on top, and then black leather pants below. You gave him a twirl and wiggled your eyebrows at him.
“So!? I had to look at a tutorial on YouTube to get this done, but I think I did pretty good–”
“You look beautiful.” And it was natural. It came out without doubt, without him thinking too much about it, and you were shocked, yet, he noticed how you diverted your gaze away from him, and he chuckled at how embarrassed you got from a compliment regarding your physique. 
“I– uh, it isn’t weird?” You asked and Eddie knew you felt a little self-conscious of how different you looked. But you were indeed beautiful, this just enhanced it in ways he didn’t think could be possible and he felt his knees bending for you.
“It isn’t darling…” 
There was a moment of silence between the two of you and Eddie could only stare at you as he walked closer to your frame. He saw how your shoulders went up and down a littler harder than before, signaling him that you were taking deeper breaths, maybe from nervousness, he didn’t know.
“Um–”
“Sweetheart…” You finally looked at him and he smiled, rolling his eyes. “Can we please go now!?”
And you giggled at him, the tension leaving the both of you as you made your way out to head to his van. 
The ride to the stadium was filled with music, mostly Megadeth which you started listening to since you showed Eddie the tickets three weeks ago. Today signaled the second month of you two completing your bucket list.
One more month to go.
And the concert was filled with screams and laughter from your part, Eddie protecting you from the people pushing against you, but you didn’t care, experiencing your first concert ever, and you wanted to share it with him. This was your first and last concert, and you decided it was gonna be Megadeth, for his taste.
“That was AWESOME! My neck needs ice from all the headbanging though.” You sighed as you two got back into the van after almost three hours of jumping around. Your make up was smudged, your hair looked a little sweaty, and your lipstick had washed away from the sweat, yet, you looked as beautiful as you did hours ago. Even before the makeup. Maybe even more.
“Hey, you were great for your first metal concert.” You giggled at his words and gave him a nod.
“I am a natural.” You smiled at him and he just kept staring at you, licking his lips as he looked down and then moved his whole body in order to face you. The nerves were almost killing him as he tried to formulate the following words.
“I uh– I can help you cross another thing off your list.” You tilted your head in question and you pulled out your notebook from the bag you left in the van with your bucket list and then a green highlighter. 
“What is it?” You smiled at him as you handed them to him and he scanned the whole list, looking for that one thing and when he spotted it, he felt his heart in his throat as he slowly showed it to you, pointing at the line.
Have the first kiss
You blinked once, twice, and then looked up at him with a confused frown in your eyebrows. He gulped loudly and he might have overstepped it, but he still waited for your response and he could see the incoming tears in your eyes as he felt his hands becoming sweaty.
“You– You don’t have to do that… I– You don’t have to do something you don’t want to–”
“I want to. I really want to.” 
He could see that you were nervous, looking everywhere but his face. You didn’t reject him. You were worried that he didn’t want to do this and felt pressured because of your list, and that was far from the truth. 
“I– How does this go?” And he wanted to smile at your innocence, but he felt sadness that you never experienced any kind of physical interaction in all your life. But he smiled anyway, in order to calm your nerves down. He raised his hand towards your cheek once you moved to face him in the passenger seat. Your breathing hitched at his touch, finally looking at him, directly into his brown eyes.
“Just close your eyes. You can tell me to stop whenever, I won’t pressure you, sweetness.”
And his voice was soft, and caring, his thumb smoothing your cheek in circles and when he saw you close your eyes, he took a deep breath in as he slowly leaned in. He could hear his heartbeat in his ears, the blood rushing to his head at a quick pace, but he had to focus. He knew his face was flushed, but he couldn’t help it.
He could smell your perfume still, despite all the jumping, all the sweat, it was still lingering on your body. He finally closed the gap between the two of you in a soft peck on the lips, staying there for two seconds before pulling away as a chill ran down his spine. He wanted to dive into it, take your lips completely, but he didn’t want to overstep. He opened his mouth to ask if you were okay, only to be surprised by your hands grasping his face, pulling him towards your mouth again.
He gasped into the kiss, and he took it as a sign that you wanted to know more, experience more, learn more. So he kissed back, his hand moving towards the back of your head in order to push you further into him as you two hovered over the console. He started to move his lips, slowly, and he felt you follow him, hesitant at first, maybe doubting what you were doing. 
He was having a hard time focusing on not letting his instincts take over, a very horrible time. This was a bad idea. This was a terrible fucking idea and he knew it, but he couldn’t help it. He needed to be the one to give this to you, because if someone else did… he wouldn’t be able to bear it. He didn’t want anyone close to you, not like this.
He felt your hands moving to the back of his head, your fingers digging into his curls, and he held a groan in, trying to not let it show how carnal he was becoming. He was nervous but he wanted to see if you wanted to take it even further, so he poked his tongue out, licking your bottom lip tentatively. 
He heard a gasp coming from you and he noticed that you didn’t get the idea of what he wanted to do, so he tried again, licking in between your bottom and top lip. You seemed to know what part comes next, so you slowly opened your mouth, and he met his tongue with yours, earning another gasp of surprise.
He wanted to know what thoughts were running in your mind right now as he kissed you. Did you feel the heat rising? Did you feel scared like he does? Did you feel happy? Confused? Nervous? What is going on in that head of yours?
He didn’t want to break it apart, he really didn’t, but it’s been minutes, and he didn’t want to overdo it at all, and he can’t hide his real feelings for much longer. He slowly pulled away from you, the smack of lips separating and vibrating all over the van. You two were breathing heavily as you stared into each other’s eyes.
“So? How was that for a first kiss?” He asked breathlessly and he could see something in your eyes that he couldn’t quite describe. It was a mixture of emotions, not one in particular, but he couldn’t pinpoint what it was. He was still holding onto your face, waiting on your response.
“It–” You opened your mouth to say something, only to shut it seconds after, and then a smirk appeared on your lips, pulling away from him to sit straight in the passenger seat. “I don’t know Munson, got nothing to compare it to.”
His mouth fell open, a laugh escaping his lips as he poked the side of your body, making a giggle escape your lips, flinching away from him as he kept poking you repeatedly. 
Yeah… your laugh was better than any song out there.
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Five days.
Five days and you were leaving.
And it’s not like you were going to come back. You weren’t going to in any shape or form.
Eddie was lounging on your couch as you put things in cardboard boxes. Things you wanted to donate since you weren’t going to need them any longer. He closed his eyes tightly, his heart aching and wanting to stop you, to yell at you that you didn’t have to do this, not anymore. 
“Okay, I think I’m done for today. You sure you don’t want any of this?” You asked him and he felt as if a knife was stabbed into his throat. He wanted to cry like he had been doing alone at night whenever he went to bed. Sleepless nights were plagued by the thought of not seeing you anymore, of not being able to hug you, of not being able ever to cuddle you like he wanted. 
“Yeah, pretty sure.” He didn’t want to sound bitter or angry, but he couldn’t hide it. You didn’t acknowledge it of course, so you shrugged, closing the box and standing up from the floor before heading to your room. 
He stared at your open door, needing to hype himself up. If it’s not now, he won’t have the chance to do it again. He needs to kiss you once more, he needs to hold you close, he needs to show his feelings through actions.
So he stood up and slowly walked towards your room. You were cleaning up your closet, looking through your shirts. He watched you move through your room, and he looked over to your desk, seeing the almost completed bucket list. Some were just impossible to complete, like riding a kangaroo, but there was a particular one that he wanted to fulfill, and not because it was on the list.
If this was the only chance he could do it, he would take it. You noticed his presence when you turned around with a shirt on your hand and saw him looking at your notebook. You tilted your head to the side as his fingers trailed one particular line that was yet to be highlighted.
“Eds? What’s wrong?” Your voice held worry as you put the shirt back in the closet and Eddie turned his head up to look at you. He turned to close the door behind him, to face you again, taking a few steps forward to stand in front of you.
“I saw one more thing on the list… a thing I want too.” His voice was small, lacking confidence, filled with nerves, but he needed this. He needed you. He hoped he wasn’t getting this wrong, because ever since that kiss the two of you stole glances from one another, laughter as friends turned into flushed giggles. 
“And what is that?” You asked with a frown on your eyebrows, in question. He wrapped an arm around your waist, flushing your body to his, his breath most likely hitting your face as he felt your shoulders move even quicker than before, signaling him you were taking fast breaths.
“Do you trust me on this?” You stared up into his eyes for a full five seconds before slowly nodding at him. He lifted his other hand to cup your face in his palm, and he leaned down to take your lips with his. 
Electricity ran through his body, and he wanted to smile, he wanted to cry, he wanted to yell, he wanted to rip and break the walls, he needed to destroy something, he needed to hug someone, he needed comfort but he also needed the rage. 
Your arms wrapped around his shoulders, holding onto him as your lips moved together, soon tongues intertwining as the seconds passed, and your breathing turned jagged as you pulled away for some air. Eddie leaned down to kiss your jaw, startling you, to then move downwards towards your neck, planting soft kisses onto your skin.
A gasp escaped your lips at the sudden sensation, new, raw, and Eddie felt you shiver under his touch, but instead, you were gripping his shoulders in order to pull him closer as the hand that was on your waist started sneaking under the hem of your shirt so he could touch your skin. 
“Eddie…” It was a partial moan, but he took it as a green light, moving you towards the bed so he could lay you down but before he crawled on top of you he took the chance to take his jacket off, throwing it across the room, not caring where it landed. 
If this was going to be the only time to have you like this, he would make sure to make you feel like the most adored person in the world. He will make sure of it. Even as your moans filled the room, he couldn’t help but want to record them, knowing he won’t ever hear them again.
And that line was highlighted in green when you both woke up the next morning.
Make love
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He didn’t want to look at you. 
He couldn’t.
The sun was shining through your curtains as you walked around the apartment with the small carry-on waiting for you at the front door. The past few days the two of you dipped into the sheets, all day, cooking when necessary only to return to bed. 
He really wanted to cry and yell, and he almost left in the middle of the night in order to not see this day. In order to just run away from the fact this was your last hour with him, and you had asked him to take you to the airport. He can ditch you, tell you he wasn’t going to do it, that you could get a cab. 
But he couldn’t do it. His heart was ripping out of his chest at every step you took in your apartment, the seconds ticking closer and closer to the departure of your plane. A plane with no return at all. A one way ticket. 
He looked around your apartment, and boxes of stuff that you wanted to donate surrounded him, as well as bags of your clothes. You told Eddie that he was the only one in your will. That fact broke him to the core, knowing that you were leaving everything to him, but the only thing he wanted was you, and you were going to leave him. 
He didn’t want your pans, your apartment, your cutlery, your game consoles, or TVs. He wanted you, and only you. He didn’t notice that his tears were falling down his face as the lump in his throat became bigger and harder to swallow at every gulp he tried to take. 
“Okay, I think I’m–” You stopped on your tracks when you saw his profile, noticing the tears, your eyes widening as you approached him, your hands cupping his cheeks for him to look at you. “What’s wrong?”
“You’re leaving me.” He wasn’t going to hold back his feelings anymore. He showed you through his actions, but he never said them out loud, and the least he can do is let you know this.
“What–”
“I love you.” Your eyes widened and your mouth hung open at his confession, but Eddie didn’t stop talking. “You’re the most amazing person I’ve ever met, and fuck, you need to know how much I fucking want you.”
You were stunned into the ground and that’s when Eddie turned to look at you, only to see tears running down your face as you covered your mouth, taking steps away from him.
“You– You can’t say that to me, not now. Please– Please– not now.” You were choking into your sobs as he stood in front of you, coughing to be able to speak.
“I– I want you to stay… Please, don’t take that flight… I beg of you, please, stay with me…” His lip was trembling as he felt nausea fill his stomach, taking a few steps towards you as the crying finally was heard through the apartment.
“I– I don’t need your pity! I– I am happy I am doing this! You’re lying in order for me to stay, and I’m not going to buy it!” You yelled through your sobs, and Eddie felt his chest ripping open at your thoughts.
“I am not lying! I am in love with you! Why can’t you believe that!?” He was screaming now, trying to get his point across but you also didn’t back down, yelling back to him with the same confusion, with the same anger, with the same sadness.
“Because how can I trust that!? How can I trust you!?” And Eddie grabbed you onto your shoulders, squeezing you tightly in order for you to look at him and not run away. His eyes were on fire as he gazed at you through his tears.
“Trust me just like you trusted me to hold your hair back when you got too drunk and you were in the toilet! Trust me just like you trusted me to teach you how to drive! Trust me just like you trusted me to protect you in your first night club outing! Trust me just like you trusted me when I made love to you!” 
And the screaming ceased, eyes locked into one another’s, tears still streaming down, never stopping, heavy breathing trembling against every wall. You were shaking under his touch, your lips trembling as your hands shook on your sides while he still gripped onto your shoulders. You opened your mouth to talk once more, your voice small, broken.
“You… One day you will get tired of me, but you will feel bad for leaving me, so you won’t… I can’t– I can’t chain you like that–” Your voice was breaking his heart, even more than before, and he shook his hair desperately as he let go of your shoulders so he could grab your hands and hold them with his, getting closer to you.
“No, no… I won’t ever get tired of you… Not you, not in a million years…”
“Eds…”
“Please… Please don’t go… Please, trust me.” 
You sobbed a gulp of air and you raised in order to give him a soft kiss on the lips. His breathing hitched at it, but kissed you back, dread filling his core, every vein, every blood cell instantly freezing at what the future will hold, of what this kiss meant. You pulled away with a small smile on your face. Small, authentic, yet sad.
“I love you, Eddie… I’m sorry…”
And your flight took off that day.
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“Mr. Munson…”
“Mr. Munson…”
“Mr. Munson!”
Eddie jolted in his seat as he put his wallet down to look up at his group of students. Gregory was raising his hand and Eddie pointed at him so he knew he was acknowledged.
“Sorry, I got lost in my thoughts. What’s wrong Mr. Gill?” He asked and his student asked something about the textbook they were all reading. His college students. He began explaining the paragraph that seemed like a puzzle to students from the book “Down the Rabbit Hole”.
He graduated in Psychology three years ago. He was offered a job as a professor in the same college he graduated from, and he was more than happy to pass his knowledge to other students to help them understand how the brain works, and the many branches that can come out of it after every single situation in life. Traumatic or not.
Once his students went back to reading, he grabbed onto his wallet again, looking inside to see a picture of you and him, completing one of your bucket list’s objectives. 
Go to an amusement park and get pictures taken in a photo booth. 
He chuckled as he remembered that outing, how you had screamed at your first ride on a roller coaster.
He became friends with Steve once again but was still not fond of the rest of the group. The only reason he got close to Steve again was because he was also a teacher in the same college. He was a professor in physical trauma, so, in their breaks, they would smoke together as they walked through campus. 
The bell rang and it was time for him to finally head home after a long day of having four classes in the day. He grabbed his suitcase, hoping no student would stop him on his way out and gladly it never happened. His hair is still the same length, but he is always using a ponytail or a bun on his head. 
He has heard rumors that people always gossip about him, asking if he was single, or what was his life like outside college. He shrugged the comments away as they weren’t important at all. He just came to work and that’s it.
He got into his car, a black jeep he saved a year for in order to buy it. He missed the van, but he had to upgrade it once and for all. His van was a little old so replacement parts were a bitch to get. He turned on his car and then started his drive back to his home, a two-story house. It wasn’t big or luxurious, but it was his home.
He sighed in relief as he opened the door, throwing his suitcase on the couch after slamming the door closed. He cracked his neck a few times before taking his blazer off and then his tie, unbuttoning the first two buttons of his shirt and opening the cuffs at the end of the sleeves. He groaned with satisfaction as he sniffed the air.
He smiled as he walked towards his kitchen, leaning against the doorway, his arms crossed over his chest, his teeth showing into a massive grin. 
“Hi baby.” You smiled widely at him as you took the pan out of the oven, filled with cookies that were freshly baked. He walked towards you, his hand stretching out in order to grab a cookie, only for it to get slapped away by you. “They’re hot!” 
“I am strong, I can handle a little bit of burning.” He grinned down at you, leaning down to give you a soft kiss on the lips in greeting. “Were my princesses hungry for cookies?”
“Are you talking to me or…” He chuckled at the pout on your face and he bent down to kiss the big bump on your belly, standing up straight later on, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close to him.
“Those two are my princesses, you, my love, are my queen.” You rolled your eyes at his antics but you giggled either way. He gave you a smooch on the cheek, making you laugh, trying to push him away. He spotted something on the kitchen counter, pulling away from kissing you and getting the item in his hand.
“Oh! Yeah, Chrissy gifted that! She said–” Eddie laughed as he looked at you and then putting the two pink pacifiers that you can put flavored ice in so they can chew and help with the heat.
“Another gift!? Damn, she really wants to be the godmother of one of our princesses huh.” You pushed onto his shoulder with a pout on your bottom lip.
“Hey, she is going to be the best aunt.” Eddie nodded at that and he really wasn’t angry at Chrissy. You met her after you moved out of your apartment to go to Eddie’s. She was moving in at the same time you were, and you two helped each other in bringing the boxes in. 
Yes, your flight took off that day… Without you in it.
You stayed with him, wrapped in his arms as you cried, not being able to stop as your feelings confused you, scared you, your mind a jumbled mess but Eddie held you through it. Eddie wasn’t going to let you go, never, and he promised it, over and over again into your ear, hoping it stuck to your brain.
“Oh no baby, I don’t doubt that.” He smiled at you as you started taking the cookies off the tray, taking care of your hands so that you don’t burn yourself. Eddie just stared at you with adoration in his eyes, as if you held the entire world in your hand, and you did. You are his world. You are everything.
You turned to look at him, raising an eyebrow in question, wondering if he was scheming something that you didn’t know about.
“Now, what is going on in that mind of yours Munson?” He found it ironic that you can easily ask that question to him when he wanted to ask that to you many times before. He smiled at you, wrapping his arms around your waist from behind, his hands resting below your bump, holding onto it as he felt his two daughters moving inside of you.
“I just love you Mrs. Munson…” You turned your head to give him a soft kiss on the cheek, before focusing once again on the cookies.
“And I love you.”
After a moment of silence, he pressed a soft kiss on the side of your neck, surprising you, yet a giggle escaped your throat.
“Thank you.” That confused you, turning your head to look at him and he was already smiling fondly at you.
“For what?”
“For trusting me.”
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The end.
a/n: this story explores the idea of death, the idea of being ready to receive it with open arms, with a rational head. But it also explores the fact that things get better if you meet the right people. It might not be now, it might not be tomorrow. It might take years for you to do so, and people in your life will come and go.
But there will always be that one person. And that is all you will ever need.
Taglist of people I mentioned this to: @littlesubbyflower @munson-blurbs @andvys
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all-about-kyu · 9 months ago
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Summary: He already knocked you up, but that doesn’t mean a damn thing to him. Pairing: Dilf!Seonghwa x fem!reader Tropes: dilf au, established relationship au Genre: smut Rating: R 18+ Warnings: language, pregnancy, aged up!Seonghwa Smut Warning: unprotected sex, cream pie, pregnant sex, cumplay, clitoral stimulation, fingering, oral (f receive) Word Count: 1,174 Host Tag: @sanjoongie @thelargefrye February Filth Masterlist Before You Interact
Listen to ♡ 3D by Jungkook
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Since that week, Seonghwa has had you locked up in your bedroom together. He’s been attached to your hip any chance he’s gotten. About a month after that week in the summer, you found out you were pregnant. Of course, Seonghwa was over the moon and wanted to tell his daughter, but you told him to hold off until you told her mother first. When you and Seonghwa met up with her to inform her of your pregnancy, she had her drawbacks. One, you were the nanny. As far as she knew, you weren’t dating. (Which had changed since the first time she met you). Two, you’re much younger than both of them are. Which isn’t her concern, but she still said it. Regardless, she knew now, which meant you could tell Seonghwa’s daughter. She was over the moon that she was getting a new baby. She was convinced she was getting a sister. She was right. 
Seonghwa was the one who was the most vocal about his excitement. It even went as far as a new kink discovery. You both knew about it, but now it was much more present. Since you told him, he’s had an obsession with cumming inside you and watching it drip out. Often times he’ll finger it back into you until you cum again. To say the least, he’s also really enjoying this libido spike induced by your pregnancy.
“Seonghwa,” you whine, nails gripping at his shoulder.
“I got you, love.” He moans in your ear, and out of the corner of your eye, you see the small bits of silver hair growing in by his temple.
You throw your head back against the pillow harder. Seonghwa starts lining small kisses along your neck and shoulder as his slow, smooth thrusts continue at the same pace. You’ve had him in so many different ways over the years of being with him, first as a quick release, then much more. The way he holds you gently and slowly helps an orgasm burn through you has to been one of your favorite ways to have him. 
“Such a pretty girl, fuck,” he groans, “You’re so tight and warm around me. Can’t believe I get to be the one who helps you become a mom.”
It’s a silly comment to say during sex, but it warms your heart still. You hold him tighter as if you could get any closer than skin-to-skin. Seonghwa pulls back slightly to capture your lips in a kiss that conveys a thousand emotions in one. 
“My pretty fiancée,” he sighs against your lips, “All mine.”
Soon enough, you feel that familiar heat bubbling in your stomach. You don’t need to tell your fiancé what’s impending. He already knows. His hand snakes between your bodies to toy with your clit in just the right way. Your legs wrap around his waist, trapping him there as you ride out your high. Seonghwa’s follows not long after. He cums inside you, making you whimper at the feeling of the warm ropes inside you as you come down from your own high. Seonghwa thrusts shallowly a few more times as he coasts through his high. He starts laughing airly as he comes down from his orgasmic high, still plugging his cum inside you.
“What are you laughing about?” You ask quietly.
He kisses your temple, “Soon enough, we won’t be able to fuck like this. Little Miss is still relatively tiny now, but give it a few months.”
You whine, “Don’t remind me, I’m gonna look like a whale.”
Seonghwa chuckles at you again before pulling back so there’s space between you, but he’s still inside you. You let out a broken, quiet gasp as he starts to pull out. The feeling of his cum trickling out of you is something you could always feel. Some people can’t stand the sensation. You can’t get enough of it. The moment he’s fully pulled out, you’re immediately met with the feeling of his fingers on your clit again.
“So damn pretty with my cum leaking out of you. I could look at your pretty pussy like this forever.”
“Hwa,” you whine, “‘M sensitive.”
“I know, my love. I know. You’re so good for me.”
You watch him and take in the absolute beauty that he is. He has small wrinkles on his eyes from smiling so much and very faint ones on his forehead. As much as he gets annoyed by the small lines, you absolutely adore them. The small pieces of silver hair growing in only add to his beauty in your eyes. You watch as he pushes his fingers into you, pushing his cum back into you. He leans down, eyes fixated on yours as his tongue comes out of his mouth and finds purchase on your abused clit. Your back arches off of the mattress at the sensation. He’ll never admit it out loud, but the taste of your arousal mixed with his cum is something he can’t get enough of, either. 
Your hands fly down to lace through his salt and pepper hair. Your engagement ring stands out against his mostly dark locks. It makes the entire situation that much more exhilarating. He’s yours. All yours. And you’re all his. He uses his fingers and tongue in the perfect way that takes you to your second orgasm of the afternoon. 
He kisses up your stomach, giving a few extra to your belly, before locking your lips together. You kiss for a while until the feeling of drying cum finally starts to get to you. Seonghwa steps into your en suite to get a damp cloth and clean you up before himself.
Collapsing in bed beside you, he pulls you close—your back against his chest. One hand runs gently over your baby bump while the other fiddles with your fingers and engagement ring. Neither of you speaks for a few moments; the comfortable envelopes you. The only sound that is heard is the sound of your heating system turning on and your breathing.
“Do you think she’ll be like Haeeun?” He mumbles, half asleep.
You smile and giggle lightly, “Maybe we’ll just need to wait a few more months to find out.”
“Four months, two weeks, and four days, to be exact.”
You snuggle closer. Just knowing he tracks your pregnancy as close as you are makes butterflies erupt in your stomach. Your doctor did say that the butterflies in your stomach randomly could very well be your daughter, too. 
“Daddy!” you hear Haeeun call.
Seonghwa chuckles, “She probably wants to cuddle. You get dressed and meet us on the couch, okay?”
“Movie time?” you smile. Seonghwa nods, “I’ll be right there.”
Seonghwa leans over and kisses your lips softly before climbing out of bed to get dressed. You follow right behind him, kissing his shoulder before he walks away.
“I love you, old man.” You tease.
“Watch it, my love.” He playfully chastises, “You may be carrying our baby, but I will still punish you for acting out.”
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COPYRIGHT ALL-ABOUT-KYU 2024© ALL RIGHTS RESERVED — reposting/modifying any fic or piece of original writing posted on this blog is not allowed. Translations are not permitted. 
Neworks: @cultofdionysusnet @kwritersworld @k-vanity
Tag List: @bratty-tingz @yeosangiess @minjaeluver @abbietwilight @wooyoungmybelovedhusband
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javierpena-inatacvest · 1 year ago
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Tired
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Summary: You had spent weeks looking forward to your date night with Javi, but once the day actually arrives, it seems like everything that could go wrong, has gone wrong. Lucky for you, Javi knows just how to make your day better.
Word Count: 5.8K
Pairing: Dad!Javier Peña x Wife!reader (Reader's nickname is Osita, no use of y/n)
Warnings: SMUT (18+) unprotected p in v sex, bathtub sex (hehehe) vaginal fingering, creampie, praise kink, big ole nasty breeding kink (listen, who am I to deny this man as many children as he wants), alcohol/being tipsy, food/eating, mom guilt, Chucho being the cutest Abuelito, Javi winning the award for dad/husband/dilf of the year 😩🥵
A/N: .... Well. Here we are again 🫠 When I tell you have made a rent free residency in my head... I do not kid you AT ALL. This has been my favorite story for our sweet little family so far. It also may or may not be how Harper is conceived OOPS 🤷🏼‍♀️ I love them, your honor.
Series Masterlist Never Too Late Masterlist
Every day for the past three weeks, you had been counting down to the 19th on your family calendar stuck to the side of your fridge, where the words “date night” had been scribbled in Javi’s messy handwriting. While you loved your girls, it had been a while since just you and Javi had a night to yourselves, so when Chuhco offered to babysit, the 4 of you couldn’t have been more thrilled- You and Javi got an evening alone, and Lucy and Elliot got to spend the night with their favorite Abuelito (Grandpa) at the ranch, getting lots of quality time with the animals, and one too many late night snacks. 
You had been looking forward to this day for weeks, and that’s why when the 19th finally arrived, you couldn’t have been more disappointed that everything that could have gone wrong that day, felt like it had. 
Lucy insisting she help with breakfast before preschool and dropping the rest of the egg carton on your kitchen floor. 
Elliot refusing to nap while Lucy was at school, leaving you with no time to get any of the things done around the house you had planned. 
The dog getting into the bathroom garbage and then throwing up 14 qtips on your carpet. 
The girls having a meltdown at the grocery store because they couldn’t bring home one of the balloons from the end of the checkout aisle. 
Going on an hour long manhunt for Flipper, Lucy’s favorite stuffed penguin she insisted had to go with her to Chucho’s, which ended up being hidden under a blanket in her bed. 
Snapping at the girls out of frustration as they chased each other through the kitchen while you were trying to finish making them dinner. 
Your pounding headache and tired body from feeling like you had been doing nothing but scrambling all day long just to stay afloat. 
And now, with Lucy teaming up with Elliot in their no-nap strike, you hadn’t even had time to shower or get ready for your date by the time Javi had gotten home, leaving you with barely under an hour  before you had to leave to make it to your dinner reservations on time. 
You wanted so desperately to just forget about the shitshow that had been your Friday, but try as you might, you couldn’t help but find yourself in an overwhelmed and grouchy mood. A mood that you did not want to be in on your long awaited date night with Javi, your internal battle of emotions only dampening your spirit further. 
As you heard the garage door open and Javi’s familiar footsteps make their way down the hallway, you fought with everything in you to try and put on the happiest face you could, as if you were going to be able to will yourself out of your funk to enjoy the night with your husband. 
“Hi, Hermosa.” Javi beamed, setting down his bag to wrap you in a hug, pressing a soft kiss onto your forehead before looking down at you in slight confusion, seeing that you were still in leggings and one of his oversized t-shirts, hair plopped up in a messy bun with very little time left before the 4 of you needed to head out to Chucho’s to make it to your dinner reservations. “Listen, baby, you know I think you look absolutely stunning in anything, but I do think the restaurant may be a touch nicer than my 20 year old t-shirt from college.” 
“I know, sorry, it’s just been- It’s been a day. The girls are in the living room playing, do you mind getting their bags and watching them until we have to go so I can shower?” You tried your best to force a smile up at Javi, who was now cradling your jaw in his large palm, tracing his thumb along your cheek. His big brown eyes stared back at you, almost as if he knew there was something off that you didn’t want to get into right now, planting another kiss in your messy hair as you let out a deeper than intended exhale. 
“Of course, Osita. Anything else I can do to help while you get ready?”” 
“No, just that. Thanks, Jav.” 
“DADDY!” Two pairs of tiny feet pattered down the hallway, Lucy and Elliot bolting towards their dad with arms outstretched, Javi now squatting down to greet them with a smile stretched across his face, almost as wide as theirs. 
“Ahhhh, there are my pollitas! C’mere mis amorcitas (my little loves).” Scooping the girls up in his arms, Javi picked up Elliot and Lucy, resting one on each hip, peppering little kisses over their faces, making them erupt in laughter. “Let’s head back to the living room so we can let Momma get ready before we leave for Abuelito’s house, sí?” 
“Okay, Daddy! Will you play horsies with us?” Lucy squealed, wrapping her little arms around Javi’s neck, giving him a hug. 
“Of course, Lucy Goosey.” Javi turned back to give you one last smile as he whisked the girls off to the living room, the sight of him carrying your daughters with such genuine joy and happiness being the first thing that had brought genuine relief today. 
The relief was short lived though, now looking up at the clock to see you were down to 45 minutes to shower and make yourself look like a halfway decent human. You frantically sped through your routine, cranking up the temperature of the water in the shower to as hot as it could go as you tried to wash away the remnants of your day. Unfortunately, the water could have been a million degrees and it wouldn’t have been enough- You forgot you were out of shampoo, having to settle for Javi’s instead, and after trying to speed shave, you realized as you were drying yourself off, you had completely forgotten to shave the bottom half of your right leg. 
You were thankful for the loud fan in your master bathroom, knowing it was enough to drown your tears as you stared yourself down in the mirror, feeling like an absolute mess. You didn’t feel excited, or pretty, or any of the things you wanted to feel before going out on your date. Truth be told, you felt like a shitty, worn down gremlin of a mom who just wanted to do nothing more than curl up in a blanket and hide away from the world for the rest of the night. Taking a long inhale, you shook your head, forcing yourself to wipe the wetness away from your cheeks to finish getting ready, and while with your hair and makeup done, and cute flowy dress wrapped around your body, you looked externally  better than you had an hour ago, internally, you still didn’t feel much better. 
You grabbed your coat and purse, making your way back into the living room to see Javi changed into navy dress pants and sport coat to match, with a white button down underneath, sitting on the couch with one daughter on each side, arms wrapped around them while they read “One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish” for what you were sure must have been the 17th time since you had gotten into the shower, considering it was the only book Lucy had wanted to read in the past week. Hearing you step through the doorway, Javi’s face lit up, biting down on his lip as he nudged the girls, pointing towards you. “Pollitas, look. Doesn’t Mommy look so pretty?” 
“You’re so beautiful, Mommy!” Lucy grinned, bolting up off the couch, wrapping her arms around your leg, squeezing it tightly. 
“So pweety, Mommy!” Elliot cooed, toddling over to join her sister, clutching around your other leg. 
You could feel the tears beginning to well behind your eyes again, seeing your little girls attached at your hip and your sweet husband staring back at you, wondering how in the world had given you 3 people who loved you so much on the days you loved yourself so little. You let out a little gulp, trying to choke back your sobs, leaning down to kiss each of the girls on the head. 
“Thank you Munchkins. Not as beautiful as my little chickens or as handsome as your Daddy, but that’s okay. You ready to go to Abuelito’s?” You mumbled through your words, your tone now making Javi’s brow scrunch in concern, giving you that look he gave you when he knew something was bothering you and you were being too stubborn to admit it. With enthusiastic squeals from the girls, they were practically running out the front door to the car, you following close behind them with their overnight bags, Javi following behind you just as closely, desperate to figure out what was on your mind. 
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The drive to Chucho’s was fairly quiet besides Lucy and Elliot’s sing-along to the Lion King soundtrack that had been a permanent fixture in your car for the past few car rides. As the girls half babbled the words in the backseat, Javi reached over, resting his hand on your thigh and rubbing soft circles against your skin, giving you that look that said, “I know something’s wrong and you’re not telling me”, you exchanging back with an incredibly unconvincing, “It’s not a big deal, don’t worry about it.” 
As you pulled up to the Peña ranch, Chucho was already outside, waiting on the porch in his rocking chair, his face beaming just as sweetly as Lucy and Elliot’s as they ran out of the car to greet their grandpa. 
“Hola, nietas! (Hi, granddaughters!)” Chucho cooed, letting out a little grunt as Lucy and Elliot barreled into him, squeezing him in their grasp. “How are my favorite little ladies?” 
“Hi Abuelito!” 
The girls giggled as Chucho kissed them both on the cheek, smiling up at you and Javi as you carried the girls bags to the front door. “Oh díos mio, girls. Look at how nice your mamá and papá look tonight!” 
“Thanks Pops.” Javi laughed, setting one of the bags down on the porch. “You still okay if we come pick these two monsters up tomorrow morning?” 
“Monstruos? My sweet nietas? Never.” Chucho laughed, giving the girls a little shake as the two of them giggled at their grandpa. “Come by whenever you’d like. You know I am more than happy to have these two as long as you’ll let me.” 
“Thanks, Chucho.” You nodded, setting another bag down next to the one Javi had placed on the porch. “Do you need us to do any-” 
“Mija, I have everything I need. Don’t worry about a thing. Now go. The two of you deserve a nice night out. Me and the girls will be just fine, won’t we?” Chucho grinned down at Lucy and Elliot, bouncing in excitement. 
“Thanks, Dad. Be good for your Abuelito, sí? I told him if you’re naughty, you’re gonna have to go sleep out with the cows.” Javi teased, kneeling down to the girls level, giving them a little tickle and kiss before wrapping them in his arms. “Te amo, Pollitas. (I love you, little chickens).” 
“Bye girls, we’ll see you tomorrow, okay? We love you.” You joined Javi, crouching down to give your girls one last hug and kiss before they were already halfway through the front door, bursting into Chucho’s house with excitement.
You thanked Chucho again, making your way back to the car, pulling down the dusty, dirt driveway before making your way back on the road. “God, I’m convinced he loves those girls more than anything else on the face of this earth. I’m sure that means he won’t mind keeping them just a little longer tomorrow, huh, Hermosa?” Javi smirked, once again placing his hand on your thigh, giving it a little squeeze before realizing you had been staring out the passenger side window from the moment you had gotten in the car, trying desperately to snap yourself out of the terrible funk of your day you just couldn’t seem to shake. 
You felt the wetness beginning to pool under your eyelids, your breaths becoming shaky and weary, trying to pull yourself together from the tired, guilty and grumpy mess that you were, but it was no use. “Hermosa? You okay?” Javi asked again, confused by your silence, gripping your leg a little tighter, the sweet and gentle tone of his voice being the final straw that broke the camel’s back. You let your tears fall freely, your sobs becoming louder and heavier as you shook your head back and forth, Javi immediately pulling over the truck to the side of the dirt road, unbuckling his seatbelt and pulling you into a hug as you cried against his chest. “Baby. Baby what’s wrong? Hey, shhhh, it’s okay, Osita. I’m here, it’s okay.” 
Javi held you, letting you take your time to cry before trying to prod about the reason behind it, feeling you take long, exasperated deep breaths against him before pulling away, wiping away the tears that had been flowing down your face. “It’s been such a shitty day, Jav. I felt like such a bad mom, and I’m so tired and I’ve been looking forward to this date with you for so long and I’m just fucking exhausted. I’m so sorry. Our date hasn’t even started yet and I’m already ruining it.” It wasn’t long before you were sobbing again, leaning back into the broadness of Javi’s body as he immediately wrapped his arms around you, gently cradling the back of your head as you cried, feeling his own heart break from seeing how hard you were on yourself. 
“Hermosa…” He cooed, pressing you against his chest while he ran his fingers through your hair. “Baby… Listen to me, okay? You are not a bad mom. You are the most wonderful mother in the world to our girls. I have no fucking clue how you do what you do all day long, but there is no one else in the world I would rather have to help raise them with. You are so sweet and patient with them, God, they’re little mini versions of you and I couldn’t be happier. You are an amazing mom, you understand?” 
“It didn’t feel like it today. God, they were so tough today and it was exhausting, I yelled at them today for running in the kitchen and I felt so bad, I just- fuck- being a mom is so hard, Jav. I love it, I do, I love those girls so much, but today I felt like I was running for worst parent of the year award. And now I can’t even pull it together enough for our date that we’ve both been looking forward to. I’m so sorry, Javi.” 
“Osita, you are not ruining anything. Baby, if I get to spend time with you, I’m happy. I don’t care where we go or what we do, if I’m with you, it doesn’t matter. So, that being said,” he paused, tilting your head up towards him, gently wiping away your tears with his thumb, “we’re gonna go home, pick up pizza, open a bottle of wine, sit and soak in the tub for as long as you want to, and then I’m gonna make sweet, sweet love to my beautiful, amazing wife until she knows just how much I love and appreciate everything she does for our family. Okay?” You let out a little huff of laughter, a small smile finally appearing in the corners of your lips as you helped to wipe your tears away. 
“Are you sure? You planned dinner reservations and I-” 
“I’ve never been so sure. I love you, Osita. You are everything to me, and I promise I will spend the rest of my life trying to make sure you remember it.” 
“God, now you’re gonna make me cry even more, you dummy.” You laughed, Javi joining in as you gave him a playful nudge. “I love you too, Jav. You’re way too good to me. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” As Javi’s sweet brown eyes locked with yours, the weight in your chest began to ease, wondering how in the world you had gotten so goddamn lucky. Buckling himself back in, and shifting the car into drive, Javi turned around, changing directions back to home, resting your head against his shoulder. 
“Can we get breadsticks with the pizza, too?” 
“Whatever you want, baby, it’s yours.” 
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With an extra large pizza and breadsticks in your lap, the drive back to your house was spent in a much lighter mood than your drive to drop off the girls at their grandpa’s. You switched out the Lion King disk in your CD player for Fleetwood Mac, the two of you happily singing along to “I Don’t Wanna Know” as you pulled back into the driveway of your house. 
You were greeted by your dog, Bear, wagging his tail in delight at your presence from the comfort of the couch, rolling over to show you his belly, Javi gladly obliging in giving him some scratches before Bear gladly put himself back to sleep, curled up against a throw pillow. “Old man could really give two shits about us being home, huh?” Javi laughed, giving the dog one last pat before making his way back over to you in the kitchen, already shoving a cheesy piece of pizza into your mouth. 
“I think he’s just as relieved from a night off from the gremlins as we are.” You laughed, catching a stringy piece of cheese that had fallen from your lips, making you and Javi both chuckle. “Is it bad if we eat pizza and drink wine in the tub?” You raised an eyebrow at Javi, gesturing towards your food, anxious to take a relaxing soak, your tub used more frequently by Lucy and Elliot than either of the two of you these days. 
“Of course not, Osita. Why don’t you get stuff ready upstairs and I’ll bring wine and pizza up? What wine do you want?” 
“I mean… It is date night. Should we break out the nice wine the Murphy’s got us the last time they came over? We did say we were saving it for a special occasion.” You smirked, holding up your half eaten piece of pizza to toast to your failed date night out, you and Javi both shaking your heads in laughter. Javi reached up in the cabinet above the fridge, pulling out the bottle and examining it before getting out a bottle opener and popping off the top. 
“God, the amount of shit Steve would give me to know that this got opened to be drank in our fucking bathtub…” 
“What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” You winked, giving Javi a kiss on the cheek before taking the last bite of your pizza. “Meet you upstairs?” 
“Can’t wait.” 
After making your way up the stairs and into your master bathroom, you cranked on the water in the tub, making it hot enough for your liking, but not hot enough Javi would complain about it being the surface of the sun. You thought that you had another set of bubbles to put in the bath besides the ones that you used for the girls, but after digging around in the bathroom cabinet, you had to settle for the bright pink, birthday cake scented bottle Lucy had insisted on getting during your last shopping trip. After the tub was full and bubbles were mixed and foaming, you stripped your clothes, dropping them on the tile floor in a heap next to the bathtub before tying up your hair and stepping into the water, sinking down to your neck and letting out a deep sigh as you closed your eyes in relief. You could feel the tension beginning to ease from your body, taking a moment to sit in the sweet silence before you heard Javi’s footsteps trailing up the stairs, gently swinging open the bathroom door, pizza and wine in his hands and a soft smile on his face.  
“Give me one more second, okay?” Setting down his things on the counter, Javi exited back out of the bathroom, quickly returning with a handful of candles and lighter, placing them around the room and lighting them all before turning off the overhead lights, the light of orange and yellow flames flickering against the walls in a soft, warm glow. 
“Wow, didn’t know I was going to the spa tonight. Very romantic of you, Jav.” You grinned, crossing your arms over the edge of the tub, resting your chin overtop of them as you stared at Javi, now undressing himself of his own clothes, throwing them into the pile with yours. “And the spa has hot naked men bringing me pizza and wine? God, I should come here more often.” You giggled, looking up at him in admiration as he passed you over your plate and glass before grabbing his own and stepping in to join you, sliding down the porcelain on the opposite side of the tub. “Thank you for this, Javi. I know it’s not what we had planned, but I really needed this.” 
“Of course, mi amor (my love).” Javi smiled at you, bringing his slice of pizza halfway up to his mouth before taking an over exaggerated sniff of the bubbles below him. “Why does the bath smell like a birthday cake?” 
“I thought I had other bubbles but the only ones I could find were Lucy and Ellie’s so we have birthday cake flavored bubbles.” The two of you laughed, shaking your heads as you bit down into your pizza, knowing that there was no one else in the world you could be happier to spend a night in a tub full of birthday cake bubbles with. 
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After you had finished your dinner and were a few more glasses of wine in, you had shifted in the tub so that you were settled in between Javi’s legs,  resting with your back against his chest and leaning your head back on your shoulder with his hands wrapped around your body, the two of you chatting and laughing away, not knowing or caring how much time had gone by. You had covered everything from Javi’s day at work, to vacation plans, now to Lucy’s interest in soccer, which had been a hot topic of conversation. 
“I know, I was talking to some of the other moms at the preschool about it, and they said they’d have their girls do soccer too, they just don’t have anyone to coach. They’re trying to find one of the dads to do it so they can start in the spring.” 
“Are you trying to get me to coach a soccer team?” Javi laughed, rubbing his hands up and down the length of your arms. “Baby, I know absolutely nothing about teaching 4 year olds how to play soccer, you would be better at it than I would.” 
“Well exactly, they’re 4 Jav, it can’t be rocket science. I think you would be good at it. You know Lucy would whip everyone into shape to make sure they listened to you.” 
“Honestly, she would probably be a better coach than I would.” 
“She honestly would. I’m being serious though, baby! You’re so sweet and patient with the girls. Plus, it’d be good eye candy to watch from the sidelines.” You giggled, tilting your head up towards Javi, biting down on your lip. 
“Good eye candy, huh?” Javi smirked back down at you, sliding his hand down your arm to your thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze. 
“Mmmmhhmmm. I could get to show off my hot, handsome husband and what a great dad he is for his girls. Make all the other moms jealous.” You cooed, shifting your body to face towards him, straddling over his lap, running your hands through the dark curls at the nape of his neck. You could feel Javi’s hands beginning to shift with you, now wrapping his arms around the small of your back, grabbing a fistfull of your ass, kneading the soft flesh in his hands. You tilted your head, letting your lips land tenderly on his before his tongue was swiping in the opening of mouth, the tenderness transforming into a passionate electricity. You let your hands roam down his neck towards his chest, sliding down under the water over his stomach, palming at his dick, already half hard in your hands. “Such a good Daddy, that maybe…” You moaned in between kisses, “Maybe it’s time for you to give me another baby.” 
Javi paused, his eyes going wide at your comment, his jaw almost hanging open as he let out a little gulp, his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat. “Hermosa… Baby, are you serious?” He couldn't help but let a boyish grin escape from his lips, his face lighting up brighter than a little kid on Christmas. 
You and Javi had agreed you had both wanted a third, but decided to hold off until Elliot was past the 18 month mark before trying again. Javi had been dying for another kid, and had been using as much self restraint as he could to keep from asking you every day if the two of you could start trying for your third child after Elliot had turned a year and a half. It felt ironic that the circumstances you found yourself in to ask him if he wanted to have another baby were because of how exhausted you were from the two you already had, but God, after thinking about him coaching that soccer team, there was something about the thought of your sweet, loving husband with another baby attached to his hip that made any ounce of willpower you had left absolutely dissipate. If Javi wasn’t hard enough from your touch, the thought alone of getting you pregnant again was more than plenty. 
“You wanna put another baby in me, Jav?” You smirked, wrapping your hand around his cock, gently stroking it as he groaned, letting his head fall to your shoulder, quietly laughing to himself, almost as if he couldn’t believe his ears. 
“Fuck me…”  Javi hissed, tugging you closer towards him, the sudden movement making water splash over the sides of the tub. One of the hands grabbing your ass snaked around to your front, grazing over your hip and inner thigh before making its way between your legs and circling against your clit. “Fuck, I want to so badly. It’s all I’ve been thinking about these past few weeks, how much I wanna grow our family, give the girls another sibling, see you all beautiful and pregnant carrying our perfect baby again. Will you let me, Osita? Let me fuck another baby into you, Momma?” The pressure of his fingers on your sensitive bundle of nerves had you moaning, letting out a soft whimper as his two fingers pressed deep into your heat, slowly rocking his fingers along the soft spongy spot inside you that he knew made you crumble. 
“Oh my God, yes. Fuck- fuck, I need you to, Javi, please.” You whined, Javi’s mouth now working its way down to your breasts, sucking and flicking at your pebbled nipples as his fingers fucked into you deeper and harder, burying your head in the crook of his neck, the sensation of his tongue and hands making your pussy begin to flutter. The heel of his palm dug deeper into your clit, pressure building in your belly as your hips rocked against his hand, each roll making more and more water overflow onto the floor as you braced yourself, digging your fingers into the skin of Javi’s broad back as that sweet and familiar tingle built at the base of your spine. 
“That’s it, sweet girl, I know you’re close. Give me one on my fingers and then I swear, I’m gonna fuck you so full of me, I’ll get you pregnant tonight.” Javi grunted through gritted teeth, feeling your cunt begin to clench around his fingers, your breathing becoming heavy and shaky as you moaned. Suddenly, you felt the coil in your belly snap, making you cry out as your orgasm ripped through your body, flooding every inch of you with euphoria and pleasure as you reached your peak. 
Javi placed languid kisses and nips down your neck and collarbone as you slumped into him, coming down from your high with labored breaths, finally composing yourself enough to sit up to see the satisfied grin spread across his cheeks, a lustful and mischievous look pooling in the dark brown of his eyes as he stared at your blissed out face. “How much you wanna bet?” You smirked, biting down on your lip before leaning in to tug at Javi’s earlobe with your teeth as you scooted closer over his lap, shifting your body up in the water of the tub to hover over his cock, carefully guiding it to line up with your entrance. 
“Bet what, Osita?” 
“Bet that you get me pregnant tonight?” You mewled, slowly sinking yourself down onto Javi’s length, savoring the sweet sting and stretch of him inside you until you had bottomed out, feeling his tip brush against your cervix. “That 9 months from now, we’ll have one more baby that gets to fill another room in our house?” Gently, you began swirling your hips, letting Javi’s cock stay buried deep inside you, splitting you open in the best way possible, almost making you speechless. 
“Jesus Christ, Hermosa…” Javi sighed, digging his fingertips into your sides, guiding your bottom half as it rolled in his lap. “I’d bet anything, because I’m gonna fuck myself so deep inside you, it’ll take. You want another baby? I’ll give you another baby, Osita. I’ll give you anything you want. My beautiful wife, amazing mom to our girls, fuck- you deserve everything.” 
Moans escaped from both your parted lips as you began to raise yourself up and down along Javi’s length, now punching along the spot inside you that had your mind going numb. His fingers circled against your already sensitive clit as he thrust up into you, the feeling of him all consuming, even as the lukewarm water of the bath swirled between you. You draped your arms around his neck as his free one wrapped around the small of your back, your bodies melting together as one as you pushed and pulled with each stroke. 
You could feel your cunt beginning to clench again, heat blooming in your belly with each swirl of your hips, tugging at the damp curls of Javi’s hair at the nape of his neck as his thrusts became more frantic and sloppy, telling he was just as close to reaching his own high as you were. “Fuck, Javi, fuck- I’m so close baby, oh shit- don’t stop.” You whined into the crook of his neck, pulling yourself even tighter against his body. 
“I’m not gonna stop, Osita. Not gonna stop until fuck you full of me and fuck another baby into you. That what you want, Hermosa?” Javi grunted through gritted teeth, pounding deeper and faster into you with each word, the water from the tub sloshing and spilling onto the tile floor below you. 
“Yes, fuck- oh my god, yes, fuck Javi, oh shit- fuck baby, I’m gonna-ahhhhhhhh.” Once again, your orgasm radiated through every inch of your body, making your legs shake and mind go blank as you cried out Javi’s name, practically melting into him as he continued to thrust into you with a desperate ferocity, close to his own end. Javi’s arms wrapped around your back, caging you against his chest, fingertips gripping in the soft skin of your shoulder blades as he fucked into you, babbling incoherently. 
“That’s it, sweet girl. Fuck, I’m close too, Hermosa. Oh fuck- God, I can’t wait to see you pregnant again. So fucking beautiful carrying our baby. You’re such a- fuck- good mom to our girls, my fucking perfect wife, I’m so luck-ahhhhhhh.” With one final thrust inside you, you could feel Javi painting your walls in his spend, milking himself of every last drop, his breath ragged and heavy as he leaned into you, your chests rising and falling in sync as you came to. 
“Well…” You laughed to yourself, shaking your head against Javi’s shoulder where it had been resting, now lifting up to grin at his blissed out face, “Safe to say we should probably clean this tub out before we let the girls use it again.” 
Javi joined in your laugher, the two of you giggling to yourselves over your antics, peeking over the side of the tub to see the giant puddles pooling on your bathroom floor. “I mean, the water had soap in it, so at least the floor is clean.” Javi smirked, cupping his hand around your jaw, pressing his smiling lips to yours. 
“Clean, really? Not like we need any extra towels or anything to wipe up all the water we spilled all over the floor because now it’s just magically clean, huh Jav?” You teased, giving him a playful nudge, Javi rolling your eyes at your heavy dose of sarcasm. “We probably should get out and wipe all of this up. Any longer in here and I think our future kid is gonna come out just as pruney as we are.” 
“Dork. I’ll clean everything up. Why don’t you go put on pajamas and I’ll meet you in bed, okay?” 
“Javi, I was just teasing. I am half the reason for this mess, I can help clean it up and-” 
Javi silenced the rest of your sentence with his lips, capturing the rest of your words in his mouth. “I know you can, Osita. I want to. Let me clean up. Can’t have you working too hard, Momma. Gotta make sure you stay nice and rested so you can grow baby number 3.” 
“You are ridiculous, you know that? You just gonna magically will me to be pregnant after tonight?” You sighed, laughing as the two of you made your way out of the tub, wrapping yourselves up in the fluffy towels you had left out on the bathroom counter, Javi draping his towel around the both of you as he leaned down to press a soft kiss into your messy hair. 
“I told you, I’d bet you anything. 5 bucks.” 
“5 bucks what, smartass?” 
“5 bucks says you don’t get your period and we find out you're pregnant by the end of the month.” 
“I’ll tell you one thing, if you are anything, Javier Jesús Peña…” You smirked, pressing up on your tiptoes to peck another kiss on his lips, “it’s confident. I hope you’re right, but I’ll take your bet.” 
If Javi was also anything, it wasn’t wrong. Because 4 weeks later, after a missed period and 3 sets of double pink lines on your pregnancy tests, baby Peña number 3 was on their way. So when you handed Javi 5 dollars and a little white box with one of your tests, you couldn’t help but laugh to know that even though your future daughter was the product of a date night gone wrong, it couldn't have felt more right knowing you were lucky enough to grow your family by one more with the man you loved more than anything else in the world.
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Taglist:
@cool-iguana @rhoorl @whyjuliaaa @bbiophiliaa @pertinentpostmortem @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24 @3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85 @partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo @endlessthxxghts @beware-my-thorns @missladym1981 @messinadress @milly-louise @jay-zzle @the-one-with-the-grey-color @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled @pedropascallvr @millennial-teenybopper
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nathaslosthershit · 5 months ago
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A Big Decision (Teen Dad!Oscar AU)
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(Part 8 of Teen Dad!OP au [Can be read on its own])
Summary: It is time to pop the big question
The twins had finally gone down for a nap after spending so long fighting it. The kids, at age three, have started to fight them more and more, leading their parents to start discussing if it's time for naps to stop. Honey, being a stay at home mom, had needed the nap time as much as her kids had in the past, giving her time to catch up on chores or just rest for a little, so she was really trying to get as much time as she could with it. But maybe it truly was over.
She was surprised to see Oscar pacing in their living room once she went back downstairs.
“Well, aren't you home early?” She says as Oscar immediately wraps his arms around her, burying his head in her neck and kissing it.
“Missed you all, did what they needed from me extra fast so I could get home earlier. Thought we could maybe go out tonight?”
“Oscar, it's a friday night. Do you know how impossible getting a babysitter would be? The kids also take a while to warm up to babysitters, I don’t think it's a good idea.”
“Good thing I thought ahead then. Lando had a free night and has been begging to see them after the last ‘betrayal’ when they wore Sargeant hats. Even better, he said he would do it for free if it meant working towards being the favorite.”
“Oscar, you can’t get your coworkers to babysit your twin toddlers for free by dangling favoritism in their faces.”
“It was his idea! I am just capitalizing off of it. I got us a nice reservation too, we just need to let him now in the next…” Oscar checks his wrist where his watch usually rests but finds it missing, “uh now. So I need an answer quickly, are we going to stay home and eat the same leftovers we have had for the past two days, or are we going to make Lando Norris the happiest man alive by letting him watch our kids for free while we have an amazingly romantic dinner?” Oscar quickly asks as he takes his ex-fiancee, now girlfriend, in his arms.
“Fine, let's go out, we could use the night off. Let Lando know I appreciate him watching them for us.”
“Perfect, why don’t you go out, do something nice for yourself, I'll take over with the kids. We still have time before dinner tonight.” Oscar suggested in a strange tone as he kissed all surface area of her face.
“What is up with you today? I don’t mind it but you are so much more touchy.” She laughed.
“Don’t worry bout a thing.” Was all he replied as he walked away. “Tonight will be the best yet, I promise.”
That’s when it struck her, why he was being so weird. Surely, he was going to propose.
After the huge fight in Suzuka, she had called the engagement off, causing them to ignore each other’s existence unless it came to the kids, for seven weeks. Since they had gotten back together, life had been blissful. Sure, it was most likely the ‘honeymoon’ phase of their relationship, but even so, they had been so ready to marry each other before things started going downhill. Maybe days after they got back together isn’t the right time to get engaged, but they had been to hell and back together since they got pregnant at 18 years old, they were it for each other, always would be. 
Oscar taking off of racing had also been a blessing. It had been hard for him, certainly. But he had needed to learn how to put his family first again, a priority that got harder to keep up with since joining Formula 1. 
As she sat in the nail salon chair, getting what were hopefully her engagement nails done, she thought back to how far they’d come. 
Arriving home with her nails done, and after getting the most amazing massage, Honey was giddy as she greeted her, hopefully, soon to be fiancé. After an hour and a half of filling her head with wedding plans and thinking about their future when she would finally get to be Mrs. Piastri after 7 years, she was more excited then she was the first time he proposed. 
This excitement continued from the moment she stepped into the shower, till the moment she sat in her seat at the restaurant. Oscar had hired a driver for the night, saying it was a night all for them, no need to be careful of how many drinks they were going to have, he had also told her he had plans to take them to the beach after where they could finish the night with a picnic by the water and stay as late as they liked. 
There was one thing that was off about him though, while she had expected nerves, she had also expected excitement from him and soon noticed the more giggly she was, the more upset he seemed to be. Maybe he realized she had caught on?
She finally asked what was up after he spilt his drink.
“Seriously Osc, what is wrong with you? You claim this is such a nice night for just the two of us but you are a mess right now!”
“It’s nothing, I’m sorry I don’t know why I’m like th-”
“Bullshit. I thought I made it clear how awful of a liar you are Oscar Jack Piastri, just tell me. Please?”
Silence filled the air as he stared at her, words failing.
“I will get up if you don’t-”
“I had a meeting with higher ups at McLaren earlier today and was told if I don’t come back then I am out of the contract and I agreed to come back for the Spanish Grand Prix!” Oscar blurted out.
Again, a heavy silence landed on the couple, both of them daring the other one to speak first.
Then, without a single word, Honey got up from the table and walked to the car leaving Oscar at the table, tears starting to fall.
Part 2 out now!
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fluffyneondinosaur · 3 months ago
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i don't think think jily would've lasted if they'd lived
Or at least not with both of them being content. I mean, first of all Lily was dating someone who' gone around bullying her ex-best friend, which to her knowledge, ended after SWM (which was sexual assault!).
However, we know that James went behind her back to continue to torment Sev even through 7th year, after Lily had started dating him. Let's take a look at the book.
“You think you’re funny,” she said coldly. “But you’re just an arrogant, bullying toerag, Potter. Leave him alone.”
“I will if you go out with me, Evans,” said James quickly. “Go on . . . Go out with me, and I’ll never lay a wand on old Snivelly again.”
Now that she's going out with him, did James stop bullying Sev? No. Of course Lily didn't go out with him to protect Sev her 7th year, but he got his girl who's only dating him because she thought he'd changed, so why not stop? Was she not enough to convince him to change?
Also, their relationship was super rushed too. They started dating at 17-18 (7th year), married and got pregnant at 19, and had Harry when they were 20.
And what does James do when they're both young and inexperienced parents? Go sneaking around with Sirius instead of staying home to help Lily care for their infant son? Let me tell you, if my dad had ever pulled shit like that my mom would've been furious.
And remember, this is the equivalent of a high school relationship. Imagine marrying someone who you dated in high school. I know that it sometimes works out, but more often than not, it's a terrible decision.
And James and co. loved Lily's feisty, fiery daringness, but I think that after becoming a mother she'd calm down a little, become a little more cautious (I'd be a little concerned for the kid if she didn't) and thoughtful. I don't know if James would've liked that change, or if he would've changed too, along with her.
I certainly hope he would, but if he toned down his recklessness, I suspect that they would grow more distant with Sirius, since he's truly an audaciously violent person (see: prisoner of azkaban, snape's head). James really did seem to care more about Sirius than Lily all through the few times we got to see him in the books, so I inclined to doubt he'd actually change.
There's no way people who sneak around their partner's back and ditch their child for a bit of reckless fun would be able to stay in a committed relationship. I think Lily would've grown to resent how reckless James would've been during the war, endangering his own life with no concern for her or Harry. And if the truth about him bullying Sev in 7th year came out, it would only make their relationship worse.
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badasmuse · 11 months ago
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“Homewrecker”
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Bada Lee x Reader
Warnings: 18+ (MDNI), lowercase intended, language, cheater!bada, bottom!bada, bada is married to h*wl, bada has a daughter, top!reader, lonely bada, she also cries, appearance from itzy’s yuna
Summary: bada is lonely, you fix that.
Part 2 Here
you absolutely loved children. ever since you were fifteen when you started babysitting for your neighbor that’s when you knew. you actually wanted to start your own daycare but you wanted a degree so you decided to take a few online classes in early childhood education. but, going to college meant you need money for books and such so you never stopped babysitting. but your usual child’s father came back into her life making you jobless once again, so when you received a text from an unknown number stating she got your number from her friend you jumped with joy. and that’s how you started working for bada lee and her husband.
on your first day, you pull up to the extremely big house, you’re nervous. you keep thinking, what if i lose this kid in this big ass house.
there’s a tall woman and a slightly shorter male standing in the doorway holding a little girl. she looks about seven. you step out of the uber and approach the little family. “hi i’m y/n. i’m looking for ms. lee?”
“that’s me.” she steps out shaking your hand. “you can call me bada. this is my husband howl, not his real name but as a dancer it’s just what he goes by, and our daughter chaeyoung. come in.”
you follow the woman in and dude when i tell you this house is huge. you could probably fit three semi trailers stacked on top of each other in here. with the wheels still on and everything. you’re too busy admiring the house to hear what bada is saying.
“got that y/n?” is all you hear.
“huh? oh i’m… im sorry i was admiring your house i didn’t hear a thing. could you… repeat that?” you say shyly.
“oh no problem. this is a list of people you can call if you can’t get in touch with either of us. always try lusher first she’s my best friend she’ll always be able to get ahold of me. i’ll be out at the studio a lot this month because i’m choreographing a few comebacks and howl is getting ready to go to japan to teach some classes. i will be back around nine tonight. here’s chae’s bedtime routine. she’ll try to stay up past eight thirty, if she fights let her because she’ll fall asleep in the next five minutes. you can just lay a blanket over her on the couch and i’ll carry her to the room when i come back. is that too much at one time?” bada asks after literally vomiting a shit ton of information.
“no no i think i got it all. also, if you’re gonna be dancing, i don’t mind carrying her to her room. you’ll be tired and probably want to shower, i can handle it.” you say smiling.
“if you can i’d appreciate it. oh we have to go. chae you be good for y/n okay? i mean it.” bada says crouching in front of the girl who just nods in response before hugging her mother tight and hugging her father’s leg.
soon, it’s just you and her. boy did she give you a run for your money. you did lose her in the house while playing hide n seek. she made you play dress up with her. she took your phone and hid it, spilled apple juice everywhere, and even went into her parent’s room and took one of her mom’s lipsticks.
by now it’s eight thirty and she surprisingly went to bed without an issue, which you were grateful for because now you have to clean the mess in the kitchen and living room.
“hi i’m home.. y/n?” you hear bada say.
“kitchen!” you respond.
“what.. happened?”
“oh she spilled apple juice. this- here. she took this from your room. um, do you mind calling my phone?” you mumble.
bada sighs and goes into a room before coming out with your phone in hand. “i’m sorry she did this to the last babysitter, and the one before. if you don’t want to continue just let me know okay?” she says helping you clean the apple juice.
you look up at her and see the sweat dripping down her face, the tired look in her eyes. she’s obviously struggling. “what time should i be here tomorrow?”
her eyes light up and she smiles brightly. “um, same time okay? it’ll just be me and her, my husband will be gone early.”
“i’ll be here. go shower. i’ll finish up and make my way out of here.” you pick up the used paper towel, throwing it in the garbage.
thirty minutes later she emerges from the bathroom dressed in a new pair of sweats and a tank with her wet hair flowing down her back.
“i’ll get your uber home. can you put your address in here?”
*
now it’s been four months and man, the feelings you feel towards this woman are crazy.
“she’s just so.. fine, yuna.” you say to your best friend. “when she comes home from the studio and she’s dripping with sweat. you know how hard it is to not jump on her?”
yuna laughs, “isn’t she married?”
“yes but… come on. her husband is never really there. she’s always tired and probably sexually frustrated. i could fix that for her for real.” you say taking the drink from her.
“that’s mine.” she sighs, “well are you gonna go for it?”
“i don’t know, should i? what if i get fired?” you say.
“then you get fired. come on i’ll drop you off. it’s almost time.”
once you arrive at the house, you knock and wait, watching yuna pull off. bada opens the door and looks at you surprised. “y/n? what are you doing here?”
you blink, “it’s.. saturday?”
“oh! oh i’m so sorry. first come in.” she steps to the side, “i’m sorry, chaeyoung is with her grandmother for today. i thought i told you. probably forgot i was doing so much this morning. i feel so bad you probably ubered here, let me pay you for that and i’ll get you one back.”
“my friend dropped me off. i can ask her to come get me.” you say sending a quick text to yuna.
“well have you eaten? let me get you something.” she says.
“i’m okay i’m not hungry.” at least, not for food.
“well.. here’s a water bottle. i’m so sorry.”
“it’s okay bada. my schedule is open.” you look at the reply from yuna and sigh. “actually could you get the uber? my friend is busy, she won’t be able to come get me for at least an hour or so.. unless you don’t mind me waiting?”
“i don’t mind. i actually wanted to talk to you about chaeyoung.” she says sitting next to you.
“what is it?”
“i’m not too sure what you’re doing but.. she used to be terrible in school, behavior wise, and ever since you came along it’s changed. what are you doing with her? what can i do to make sure she doesn’t act that way once you get your degree and stop working for me?” bada sighs, leaning back on the couch.
“bada,” you turn your body to face her, “the issue with chae is you don’t give her enough attention. i know both you and howl work a lot. it happens. but she tells me all the time how she wishes at least you were here more often. she’s lonely. it’s only her and you stick her with a bunch of strangers. she told me she feels happy when i’m here because even tho i’m leaving, i still make her happy because i’m giving her the attention she craves.”
bada wipes a tear from her cheek, “i try. it’s just hard. i want to be here. then howl took that stupid job traveling to different countries like he doesn’t have a wife and child at home. i feel like i’ve been snapping at her which is why i sent her with her grandmother. i wanted to.. be with my husband and he’s not even here he went to america. i wanted to talk to him about this.”
you pull bada in for a hug and rub her back as she cries into your shoulder. “you’re doing the best you can, bada. you can’t be too hard on yourself. howl should’ve thought about that before he left. he needs to understand you need help.” you say softly.
bada pulls back and looks at you, “you really think i’m doing my best?”
“i do.”
there’s a tension filled silence as you look at each other. you don’t know what fueled you but you lean in and kiss her on her lips before pulling back quickly. “oh shit i’m sorry you’re married-“
she cuts you off with another kiss gripping your shirt. this one is a lot more desperate. “please…” she mumbles against your lips. “i need this please.. please don’t go.” she whines.
“your room.” you say and she stands up pulling you into the bedroom she shared with howl.
she pushes you on the bed and climbs on top of you finding your lips again as your hands trail under her shirt. you pull it off her and she whines.
“relax baby, i’ll make you feel good, just be patient.” you turn her on her back kissing her neck and down to her chest. lifting up her bra you attach to her nipple, sucking gently and she moans. you pinch the other one with your fingers and her hips buck up against you, looking for friction.
“keep your hips down.” you whisper, kissing down her stomach. you leave marks on her hip bones and she moans your name.
“y/n please… please i want you so bad!” she writhes on the bed.
you pull her shorts off and she’s not wearing anything under them. “made this easy for me huh? oh you’re so wet for me bada.” you run a finger over her clit and her leg jerks. you put her leg on your shoulder and make eye contact with her. “can i?”
“please y/n please do- OH!” she moans out when your tongue makes contact with her clit. her hands clutch the sheets as you suck on her clit, sticking two fingers in her.
her breath hitches and she lets out loud moans, “oh my god s-so good! please more!”
you insert another finger curling them up into her spot. she lets out a squeal. “why are you so good at this?” she moans, hands going to your hair as she fucks herself onto your fingers. “i’m cumming!”
you speed up your fingers, flicking your tongue skillfully and she cums with a scream, your name falling off her lips.
you pull your hand out giving her a minute to breathe. “you okay?” you run her lower stomach gently.
“i need… more. please? i have.. have toys in my sock drawer.” she pants.
you walk over to where she points and find a different array of toys. “oh you’re kinky.”
“please use whatever you want. make me your slut. please.” she whines.
you bite your lip, grabbing the dildo, a vibrator, and some handcuffs. “you mind?”
“oh please!” she moves her hands to the headboard, letting you cuff her to it. “i-i can eat you out while you fuck me. you can sit on my face.”
you shiver at the thought before stripping and doing what she wants. her tongue skillfully explores you and you question how she let a man trap her with a tongue like that? you lean forward and put the dildo in her, immediately thrusting it in and out of her while putting the vibrator on her swollen clit. she moans into you and pulls at the cuffs. you’re worried she might be uncomfortable so you lift up but she whines loudly. “i’m not finished!”
you sit back down, thrusting the toy faster and turning up the speed on the vibrator. you let out a moan trying not to grind on her face. you move when she starts to mumble something.
“what did you say baby?”
“use me. use me to get yourself off. make me your personal tuck toy.” she moans out.
you moan as you move back onto her face doing as she asks all while you fuck into her tight count with the dildo. you’re close and you know she’s close from the way her moans get higher. she latches onto your clit sucking roughly as you pound the dildo into her gspot and you’re both cumming with loud moans. you remove the toys and she squirts all over her bed. you get off her and rub her clit, helping her ride out her high.
“okay! okay i’m done i can't…i’m done please!” she moans pulling the cuffs.
“give me one more. let me make sure you’re 100% satisfied. you might not get it this good for a while.” you whisper.
she whimpers and cums one last time, her juices flow out of her and you caress her thigh gently.
“so good for me bada. did such a good job.” you uncuff her and she pulls you in for a kiss. you can taste yourself on her tongue.
“thank you.” she whispers. “i needed that. god i needed that.. tell your friend nevermind. stay with me.”
“what about your husband? and chae?” you ask.
“he’s gone for a week, chae will be back tomorrow night. after i take a nap i want to go again.” she groans, turning on her side.
grabbing your phone, you tell yuna to just bring your backpack that has your strap instead and you lay down next to bada. she immediately moves her head onto your chest and sighs, falling asleep.
that was a lot easier than you thought it would be.
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nescaveckwriter · 5 months ago
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Hey, lovely! 🥰
So I'll put the request here too to make it easier for you to answer: can I request a fic from you where Dean falls asleep on Y/N's shoulder when they're hanging out with her family like that dream I told you about 🥹 something sweet and fluffy, and maybe she'll later tease Dean, but just a little 😆🤭
Love you and thank you! 🤍☀️
❤️. Awww @k-slla 🐞... I really hope this is what you had in mind, Oh goodness 🤭 its such a cute request 🥰 and I love you too 💕... Also I'm going to tag @artyandink for my first post on the #Jensenathon and then @anyfandomgoesbingo for my fist square ('Game Night, will be in bold') 🤭🥰 hopefully y'all like this . 🥰🤭🐞
Warnings: I'm going to say 18+ only ya know just for precaution 😅 but honestly there's none, just fluffy and sweetness.
Words: 1015
A little fun !! 🤭❤️❤️
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He's hand runs over his freckled face, it's been a rough couple of days, he's been struggling more to sleep, than in a while, everything weighing so heavily on his shoulders, so when I came running towards him, big smile plastered on my face, almost excitedly jumping up and down, like a two year old, "Dean! Babe?" His green eyes stare into mine, and I feel butterflies swirling around again, "Sweetheart? Don't you seem all excited!" 
Laughing "I am, it's been awhile since we had a fun time" giving him a Bambi-like glaze "so, my parents invited us to Game night, please can we go?" 
He couldn't keep the smile from tugging at the corners of his perfect plum lips, "That sounds like fun sweetheart"
 "Really?" I yelped.
He pulls me into one of those breath stopping hugs, tugging his head into the crook of my neck , the hot air of his breath tickling against my skin , while he whispers "your the only bit of light in this world you know that?" I just hugged him back, unsure how to reply, the emotion welling up in my eyes, so instead of saying a single word, I held him tight, wrapping my arms around his shoulders, just lightly running my fingers, in his hair. I'm not sure how long we held each other in that heartfelt embrace but without saying a single word, it spoke of love, trust, peace, maybe the only sense of peace we had in our lives.
Blasting the radio loudly, playing Dean's favourite Led Zeppelin songs, on the drive over to my parents house, we got out, in a quite cheerful mood, well I could still see the heaviness in those emerald green orbs of his, but I made a quick promise to myself that, I'll do anything in my power, to make sure he has a little fun and relaxes a bit. So without further due, I grabbed his hand, which in return he held the beer and some of the snacks. We rang the doorbell and got welcomed as if we were long lost. We walked in and the living room, spoke of fun with the board games all stacked up, there was wine, and beer, finger foods, it spelled laughter and fun.
 As the night got started and we were teamed up together we laughed and shared stories throughout the games. When Dean ate all the pie and some other snacks, me and my mom went into the kitchen, to get some more snacks. When she smiled looked at me and said, "Sweetie,you look so happy are you?" 
My eyes glistened, "Mom! I'm not happy, I'm overjoyed, I simply adore Dean, I love him more than anything in this world" soft tears rolled down my mom's cheeks, "Sweetie I'm so happy for you, he looks like a good man" I nod, "He is mom, he has his problems but when it comes to me, he treats me like a queen". And with that we walked back to where Dean and the rest of my family were sitting. He gave me that smirk, of his, the one that made my knees weak, and I smile back, he pats the seat next to him, and I gladly obliged, he placed a sweet kiss on my cheek, I placed my hand on his thigh, giving him a slight squeeze, after my father cleared his throat he said we should maybe play a card game, and so we started.
The rest of the night was filled with laughter, an accusation of cheating every now and again, but it was all playful, and light hearted fun, and as the night went on, everyone taking turns, when it came to Dean's turn, I felt his head resting on my shoulder, and when I looked down, I saw his eyes were closed, the man fell asleep in the middle of room filled with people. I didn't have the heart to wake him up, or even stir a little, so I took the beer out of his hand, and the left over cards and sat it down with mine, mouthing to my parents that we are done playing for the night so I just watched them play further on, until one for one got up and either went home or to bed, leaving me and Dean in the living room, his head still on my shoulder. It didn't take long for my eyelids to fall close, my head gently rested against him.
The night turned into early morning sunrays lighting up the room, my eyes fluttering open only to be met by his forest green orbs, his voice gruffly "Sweetheart when.. what... How?" Smiling, I look at him, my own voice a little croaky from the sleep, "No! Apparently we're so boring and not good company at all, you fell asleep while we were playing cards" 
Dean looked shocked and ashamed "Sweetheart it's not that, it's, I'm so sorry okay, I don't..." I pressed a finger on his lips , "Shhh, babe I'm joking, I know you were tired" A smile tugs at his plum lips, "really you had to make me feel bad didn't you?" Shrugging my shoulders, chuckling a bit "I couldn't help myself, sorry my love" he looks at me as if he's looking into soul, "I love you, you know that right?" Nodding about to answer but before I could, he's lips crashed against mine in a searing kiss, his fingers tangled in my hair, I couldn't hold the small moan escaping my lips, the grin on Dean's lips was unmistakable, he shifted slightly, gently guiding me to lay on the couch, I giggled, whispering "My parents'' pressing his finger against my lips, "shhh sweetheart, we don't want to wake them up do we?" with that he captures my lips in a passionate kiss, after a little while, he pulls back, hoarsely whispers "I like game night!"  planting yet another kiss, in that moment I knew, I Will always love this green eyed man, even if he falls asleep mid family events.
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@jackles010378 @winchesterwild78 @angelbabyyy99 @cevansbaby-dove @bookishtheaterlover7 @cutedisneygrl
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hellishjoel · 1 year ago
Text
burning desire
10.3k // pairing:dbf/neighbor!joel x f!reader
Series Masterlist l Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
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pt. 1 pt. 2 pt. 3
summary: An argument with your mother before family dinner leaves Joel worried about you. He sneaks you away to grab a drink and talk about what’s on your mind. 
warnings: MA 18+ (minors DNI), no outbreak, dbf/neighbor!joel, soft-hot-protective!joel, rocky mother-daughter relationship (this one ain't for the weak - mommy issues galore) & discussions of verbal fighting, slight clues of abandonment issues, smut, swearing, age gap (reader is in her early 20s, Joel in his 40s), pet names, praise!kink activated, unprotected p in v (yes finally, the edging is over), mentions of birth control,  slight cockwarming if you squint, slight degradation kink
A/N: I crave three things after writing this chapter: Joel, Joel Miller, Joel fucking Miller. Also, I’m almost done with The Last of Us Part 1 :(( sad that it’s ending, but it’s been so much fun to play! Enjoy this chapter <3 
Your parents make good on their invitation and ask Joel over for dinner. A steak dinner, to be exact. Paired with wine, mashed potatoes, green beans, and a pie your parents picked up from the local bakery in town. 
You sort of hope Joel pulls out his long list of excuses to evade any awkwardness. 
Sorry, can’t tonight. I’m finishin’ up somethin’ for work. Can’t wait another day. 
Or,
Hey, maybe another night. Not feelin’ too hot. 
When in reality, it’s more like, 
I can’t come over for dinner tonight because I might bend your daughter over my truck if I see her again. 
As active as you and Joel have been, you have yet to hit a home run in lewd baseball terms. In fact, all the bases in your and Joel’s game were totally screwed up. You hit third base before you hit first, and you weren’t even sure if there was a second base. It was all just so confusing now. 
But you wanted the home run, you wanted Joel, you desired him in that light. You wondered if he was ready for it. 
Screwed over by your father asking Joel over for dinner and screwed over by Joel agreeing, you had no other choice but to sit through it and act like everything was normal. 
And everything was normal for the first half of the day before you and your mother got into it. 
The argument was recycled. You wished she would come up with better material. But it always came down to what you wanted to do after this summer since you recently graduated. And that was an ongoing war. 
After two door slams, your mother retreating to her bunker, and you finding shelter in the bathroom, you’d say today’s battle was over. 
You sit on the floor, bare feet touching cold tile. In a way, it soothes your shaky body. 
No matter how old you get, this feeling never seems to waver with its intensity. The feeling that no one’s listening, no matter how hard you scream for them to hear you. Regardless of how often you have these conversations, you become a small child again, being scolded and told that what you thought and wanted wasn’t right. 
You managed to collect your journal expertly hidden in your bedroom before fleeing to the safety of the bathroom. You flip open the pages with teary eyes. 
You wish you didn’t have to admit that this was your safe space. On the bathroom floor, back flushed against the dark wood door as you closed your eyes and tried to calm your breathing. 
June 17th  2:28 P.M. 
Mom started a fight with me about not traveling again. She says it’s crucial for me to start my career immediately. I don’t even know what I want to be yet. 
You have to pause to blink back tears. You wish you had your life figured out like it felt everyone else did. 
Why does she have to care so much that I want to leave for a little bit? It’s not like it’s forever. There’s so much more out there. I’ve studied miscellaneous classes for four years and want a break. Why do we always have to have this conversation over and over again? She always asks how I will take care of student loans and bills. I have repeatedly told her that I’ve been saving up for a while to do this. She keeps saying she wants what’s best for me and doesn’t want me to start my career too late. She says it’s hard to let me go.
I love her, and I appreciate her support through school, but school is what taught me about independence as well as academics. I want to live my life and have experiences you can only get by leaving home for a little bit. Maybe then I’ll better understand what I want for my future. 
Your writing pauses, and you stare straight ahead at the beige wall, blurry eyes reading another cheesy sign. Bathroom - Open 24 Hours - Seat Yourself. 
You decide to spare a moment of your mother’s casualties and pencil in something else that’s been recently stirring. 
I’ve been seeing Joel Miller casually since the start of this summer. I can’t believe I’m even writing this. It’s weird -- but in a way, it’s also not? He’s older by like a mile, but he’s familiar, comfortable. Easy to talk to. It doesn’t feel like he’s judging me. I’m not trying to read too much into it, but this summer sucks less because of Joel. Whether he knows it or not. 
---
You and your mother work around each other while setting up dinner in the backyard garden. She steps back inside to grab more wine glasses. 
You’ve put on a nice summer dress. The hem lands somewhere on your thighs and flows with the breeze. After sobbing on the cold bathroom tile for an hour, you don't feel very pretty, but eating outside and soaking up some fresh air might make you feel better.
“Hey, sweetheart.” 
Joel Miller was the largest, broadest, lumberjack-est man you had ever met, but he moved as quietly as a mouse. Your eyes blink a few times as you haphazardly set down the bowl of mashed potatoes on the circular table. 
“Hi.”
Your voice is raw and red, softer than usual. Joel seems to instantly take notice. You see it in the way his eyes soften. He moves a little closer, hands resting on the back of one of the white outdoor dining chairs. 
Your face probably reads more panicky than intended. He picks up on your faulty mood and assumes the worst. 
“Do they.. Do they know?” He asks, eyebrows knitted with a deep furrow in between. 
Your eyes go doe-ish, shaking your head and occupying your hands with a spare cloth napkin.
“What? No. Why would you think that?” 
He doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t have to. He takes one long look over your being and you feel it in the space between you. 
Somethin’s wrong. 
Nothing’s wrong. I’m fine, Joel. 
He tilts his head, eyes narrowing on you more. 
Suddenly, you felt exposed. Like someone had ripped the curtain open on you. No one had ever seen right through you like this before. It was unsettling, but god, you just wanted to lean right into it. 
If your parents weren’t just inside, you’d walk right into his front and curl your head in his chest just under the hook of his chin. You’d close your eyes and wrap your small arms around his waist. 
He’d encircle you in his big, protective arms and shield you from the pain you’ve felt today. You’d listen to his heart thrumming against his chest, using the rhythm to try and slow down your breathing while he whispers to you in his sweet southern drawl.
S’alright, sweetheart. Everything’s gonna be okay. I see you tryin’. 
His eyes flitter into light again, ease passing across his features. 
“Like the dress.” He looks over you with a condescending little smirk. This man has never seen you in a dress in your life. 
“Shut up. It’s just for dinner.”
He lets out a cocky little tut. “‘Cause you knew I was comin’ over?”
When you look up at him again, his hand gently rests over yours. You don’t have time to appreciate it; the sliding back door opens, and your father’s big booming laughter shakes the nearby lake. Joel’s subtle touch is instantly gone. 
“Joel! So good to see you! Hey, great bonfire a few weeks ago.”
You take a deep breath and excuse yourself from the shop talk. You don’t want to be alone with your mother in the house, but the table still needs to be set up. You work around each other in silence. She grabs the salad, you grab the dinner rolls and green beans. You could hear a pin drop. 
---
Dinner would have been better if you had an appetite. You spent the majority of your time making a tilled farm field out of your mashed potatoes. You’d flatten out your helping with a fork and then gently run the fork’s ribs through the moldable potatoes and create little crop lines out of it. You don’t always play with your food, but you weren’t really up for conversation. Your mother takes notice. She hates it. She hates that you were letting your personal problems exist in the company of others. 
The only time you looked up even slightly was when Joel started talking. Sort of a calm in an unknown storm, you suppose. He looked so handsome without even really trying. You wore a crooked smile as you looked over the dark green button-up he was wearing. It was starting to be your favorite color, he wore it so well. 
There were points where your parents would turn to each other. And Joel would turn to you. It was sort of a silent check-in. 
Under the protection of the table, his hand found your knee, his big fingers lightly playing with the hem of your dress. It was the first time you cracked a real smile all dinner. Your hand ghosted over his, your nails lightly running soothing, slow lines on the underside of his wrist by his watch. 
You doin’ okay?
Mhm.
It didn’t dawn on you that Joel might have felt he did something to cause your saddened mood. And this was his way of asking. You bit down on your lower lip, feeling his fingers lightly interlock with yours over your knee. Your eyelashes flutter at the warmth it propels through your body. It was just what you needed. Everything was going to be okay. 
---
You’re working over a stubborn steak juice stain on a plate as the sun sets over the lake and glistens a soft yellow-orange hue through the windows in the kitchen. Your parents are moving around you while you rinse the dishes, back turned to them as they spoke in mundane conversation and pack up leftovers.
You don’t see him, but you can feel Joel’s presence as he enters the doorway. He watches you. He watches your parents. You wonder what he sees. The next thing you know, he’s shaking your parents hands and bidding them goodnight. 
He stops at you. As the running faucet splashes against a few forks and a wine glass, you spare him a glance. 
“Walk me out?” Your parents take notice of his ask. And not in the way you expect. 
You tilt back and forth on your feet, looking back to the dishes. You really just wanted to finish what was left to clean and read in your room for the rest of the night. 
“Uhm-”
“Go on and walk him out, honey. We’ll see you soon, Joel. Thanks for stoppin’ in.” 
Your eyes go from Joel’s, to your parents. If they were anything, at least they were oblivious. 
You and your mother share a look before she sighs and exits the kitchen. Your jaw loosens, not even realizing how hard you were grinding your teeth while looking at her. 
“Yeah. Okay.” Your murmured voice is barely audible above the gushing sink faucet. After you set the plate on the drying rack and smear your wet hands on a dish towel, you walk Joel outside. 
The night breeze off the lake sets in a layer of goosebumps up your arms. 
Joel’s boots scuff against the gravel and dirt in his driveway, his footsteps pausing at his truck and turning to face you. 
The rising moon and setting sun work in unison to highlight his aquiline nose and silver-sprinkled jawline. He’s charmingly handsome. Rugged features meet a stone facade. 
You take a hesitant look back into the house. The kitchen light is still on, but no one is in the small windows. 
“You wanna tell me what’s really goin’ on with you?” He crosses his arms, cocking his leg out as he leans his weight onto one of his hips. 
You muster up a shrug and fold your hands around your arms to keep the light chill away. It felt like you couldn’t tell the truth, the house and your parents inside watching over you. The pressure of it all makes your shoulders lurch up a bit into your neck. 
But Joel continues to press you. You’re making him nervous, you think, because he’s not accustomed to seeing you so quiet. 
“Are you..” His words falter and fall off, and you can see the frown creased into his mouth.  “You’re wantin’ t’stop seein’ each other?” 
“What?” Now you’re the one frowning, closing the gap between you and Joel and taking him by his hand to the other side of the truck, using it as a shield between you and the rest of the world. Your back flushes against his driver-side door. 
“No, I don’t want to stop seeing you, Joel.” You frown and squeeze his hand a little tighter in assurance. “Trust me. You’re kind of..” You struggle to make the words fit. Nothing seems right. You’re kind of the only person I want to be around right now.
Joel looks a little relieved. He doesn’t make you finish your sentence. He seems to connect the dots. Joel looks from your solemn face to the house behind you—the cause of your ill-stricken mood. 
“How about we grab a drink n’talk.” It’s not a question, exactly, it’s more like a command. 
You don’t want to talk about what happened, and you have a sneaking suspicion that if you two go off together, your parents will be asking questions. 
You push the toe of your sneaker into the gravel and twist slowly back and forth. 
“I should just head back inside. My parents are probably waiting up for me, anyway. Cleanup duty.” You say unenthusiastically with a dash of sarcasm. Joel’s eyes are looking past you, still at the house. You turn around to follow his eyeline. All the lights in the house have been turned off—even the porch light. Joel scowls at the sight, thinking how he always leaves the light on for Sarah. 
The caged-in feeling returns, your chest tight as you look to your feet and try to breathe through the ache your heart held. You wanted to get out of here, and now. 
“Never mind.” You bite down on your lower lip to hold it together. “Let’s go.” 
You’re already swinging open Joel’s door, rust creaking at the joints as you slide into the passenger seat. These old trucks with no center console were so cool to you. Maybe you'd appreciate it more if you weren’t in such a shitty mood. But Joel’s already in the truck beside you, the warmth he’s radiating was welcome. His key turns in the ignition, and it clicks a few times before the engine roars to life. 
You don’t talk, he doesn’t force you to. You feel at peace putting some distance between you and the lakehouse. 
Joel drives past neighborhoods with funny street names.  Thunderbird Lane. Firefly Drive. Sugar Loaf Lane.
As the sun just finishes setting, the whole town is covered in an orange glow that will soon fade to purple. Everything flies by your window, and moving at this speed feels like the cage is lifting around your chest, the clasps on your wrist snapping free. 
Rolling down the window makes the breeze funnel into the truck and flow through your hair. Before you know it, your body is halfway out of the window. 
“What ‘n God’s name do you think you’re doin’?” Joel’s tone was warning, his fist catching your dress in a fist around your lower back in an attempt to make sure you didn’t get thrown out of the truck.  “Get back in here.” 
You turned back so Joel could see you, eyes lit, and a smile from ear to ear. His hold slowly loosens at the sight before him. 
Back arched out the window, he drives a little slower and towards the center of the road. You look up, arms outstretched into the night air as you breathe everything in. Fresh lungs, filled with a new perspective, no tears left to cry as you hang out of Joel’s window. The stars gleam, and the universe is vast.
Oh my god. You hear yourself mumble, feeling freedom reeling through your entire body. And like that, you were new again. 
A satisfied sigh leaves your lips. You’re back in the truck now, and you roll the window up but not completely closed. The wind still tickles a breeze into your thrown-about hair. You look to Joel, his eyes already on yours. 
Joel sees your fire has been re-lit, thrashing out licks of flame and building in intensity. He adores you wild and free.
“Better?”
You fix the space between you, your body melting into his side as your head lazily rolls onto his shoulder. His heavy arm finds its way around the tops of your shoulders to keep you sedentary. 
“Much better.” 
---
He ends up passing the central part of town. It’s better this way. Go somewhere he won’t be recognized with a woman half his age. He’s the one who lives in town throughout the year. You and your family only visit in the summer. It doesn’t help that the town is small, and Joel is one of a handful of skilled contractors in the area. 
His rusted truck lulls to a jittery stop outside a small bar lit by a red neon sign reading, Past Lives. You wander inside, passing empty barstools and a glowing dartboard, while your sneakers crunch peanut shells littering the ground. You nearly slipped on a large pile of them, but Joel’s hand was firmly on your bicep before you could flail any further. 
“You might be the clumsiest woman I’ve ever met.” He mutters, annoyance passing over his features. 
You roll your eyes and scoot onto one of the tall barstools at a small square table against the wall. “I doubt that’s true.” 
He shrugs his shoulders and cracks open a peanut, tossing it into his mouth. “You’re right. Your mother is the clumsiest woman I know. You get it from her. Once, I watched her glide five or six feet down the end of the dock and land in the water.” 
An ill feeling passes over you again, pursing your lips as you trace your finger around the small bowl Joel is picking his peanuts from. 
Joel halts his movements, chewing included, and watches as your eyes stare meaninglessly at the table. 
“Never really seen you like this. Thought I’d like it if you were quiet for once. But now it just feels out of character.” 
Joel’s boot teasingly nudges your sneaker under the table. His brown eyes look warm despite the lack of light in the dingy bar. Your stomach twists thinking about how he looked under the moonlight just half an hour ago. 
Those pretty eyes of his meet yours. Soft. Kind. “Talk to me.”
A beaten-up sigh leaves your lips, tugging at the hem of your dress. 
After a drink or two, you tell Joel everything he missed before dinner. How you and your mother fought. How it was all venom and tears, leaving you cold and alone on the bathroom tile. By the time the battle came to a halt, there was no clear winner or loser. 
Joel’s an attentive listener. He doesn’t interrupt. He knows when to prompt you need a push. Joel’s pile of peanut shells has turned into a small molehill. The ice in your drink sloshes around as you start talking with your hands. 
“I love her, I mean, she’s my mom. But she’s always fought me on this. This-this-...”  
“The traveling,” Joel assists, his large hand nursing a small glass of whiskey. He looks amused like he enjoys watching you spew. You supposed he feels more relieved to see you explode like this rather than holding it all in.
“And-and it’s so much more than that! She fought me about leaving Texas for school, she fought me about doing a semester abroad, she just can’t let me go, it’s suffocating!” 
You didn’t mean to sound so passionate, and you hadn’t realized how vocal you became until someone slowly clapped on the other side of the bar in appreciation. You stifled a laugh and put your head shyly in your hands. 
He nods slowly, waiting to see what you’ll say next. You’re using him like you’re journaling at home, now it’s just interactive. 
You sigh and pinch at the bridge of your nose, closing your eyes as you listen to an old country slow song humming throughout the bar. 
“Didn’t even wanna come back this year.” Your words are barely above a murmur. 
This makes Joel pause. “What d’you say?” 
You sit up straight and sigh, crossing one leg over the other under the table. These stupid drinks are making you tell the truth. Be more vulnerable than you would ordinarily be. But it’s also because you’re talking to Joel, and he’s always been interested in what you have to say. 
“I didn’t want to come back this year. These past few years, I didn’t come back to Danbury because I sort of- purposely- busied up my summer. Internships, work, anything to keep me busy and out from under their-their….” You pause to make hand gestures that are wide and all-encompassing. 
Joel juts his jaw out to the side, lips pursed before he speaks again. 
“M’happy you came back.”  
There’s a moment of silence. Joel’s eyes aren’t on yours anymore. He’s swirling his glass around slowly and watching his ice rotate in a sloppy circle. You slowly start to smile as he looks bashful. 
“What did you say, Mr.Miller?” You pry teasingly, reaching your hand over and gently stroking his watch band. The nickname makes his eyes narrow on yours. 
“Nothin’. Forget about it.” He throws back the last of his drink, and you’re cooing for him to continue. 
“Wha- Joel, come on! Why did you say that?” 
He’s just trying to buckle down his smile, hiding it with his whiskey glass and shaking his head. 
“Didn’t say nothin’.”
“Yes, you so did. Don’t even try to lie.” 
“I’ve never lied a day in my life.”
Your eyes go wide, and now you’re smacking his forearm. He’s shoving quarters at you now, sliding them to your side of the table as a form of distraction. 
“Can you just-” He scoffs under his breath and rolls his eyes, finalizing his quarter total to four. “-fuck off, go put a song on the jukebox.” 
You sneer at him but obey. You look for something particular, pausing on Little Lies by Fleetwood Mac, smirking at him as you punch in his quarters. He seems confused as to why you stay standing at the jukebox. 
The chorus hits, and you point accusingly at him as you do so. 
“Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies,” you can’t even finish before your right foot catches on more slippery peanut shells, freezing like you were caught on ice skates and trying not to fall. 
Joel’s hand has a vice grip on your bicep again until you regain your balance. God. Your face gathers heat as you snatch your phone off the table, and he lets out a laugh at your expense. 
“Can’t sing,”
“Hey-”
“Can’t walk in a straight line.”
“I had like four drinks.”
“Two.” He corrects. There’s no hiding that you’re just unbearably uncoordinated. 
“God. Just- get me out of here, Miller.” 
Joel was biting back a smile. He likes teasing you, taunting you. Only because you know how to serve it back to him. 
“Not until you see this. Wanna show you somethin’.” He sets down his whiskey and lays down cash to cover the tab. 
You start your stride, and Joel’s already looking at you with instilled concern. You insist I’m fine. Go on. You follow him through a narrow hallway towards the restrooms, an exit door lit up with a red sign over it. 
The walls are filled with signs, pictures, and letters, all illuminated by a soft flickering strip light.  These were trails that people had left along the way, passing through the bar and leaving a piece of them behind for strangers to admire. It was like a memory wall. 
Joel leans back against the men’s restroom doorframe, arms crossed as he silently admires the wall. And you. 
Your fingers brush an old family picture timestamped from the late 80s. There were business cards, from bankers to bonds bailsman. 
You feel Joel’s hand cast warmth on your hip, guiding you further down the hall. You follow his eyeline to a large yellow-light spoiled wall map. There were push pins all in different parts of the world. 
“Look at all of these, Joel!” Your eagerness was evident as you stepped in front of him, finger flying from one point to the next, squinting past the tacks to read the cities people have visited. 
“Bangkok, Thailand. Paris, France. Of course. London, Dubai, Tokyo.” Your voice trails off, finger-stopping around the empty parts of the map that some of the bargoers had yet to venture off to. The pins around the state of Texas were ironic. 
You gently took a step back, Joel's broad and hardened front caressing your back. His arms gently wrap around you before they clasp at your front. You rest your temple against his bicep as you sigh. You found comfort in him tonight more than he could understand. 
Your neck cranes to the side and up, observing his defined jawline from below. “Have you ever been out of the country?” Your face is lit with excitement, only to fall as he slowly shakes his head. You turn back to the map, your fingers gently holding onto his muscular forearm. 
“Am I crazy for wanting to leave?” 
You can feel a heavy breath leave through Joel’s nose, the air fanning over the top of your head. 
“You’re not leavin’. You’re travelin’. You’ll come back, eventually.” 
The muscle in your jaw twitches, and your eyes move to the Eastern side of the map, spotting the tiny European countries. 
“Maybe my mom is so worried that if I decide to leave, I might not come back.” You say it as a joke. It makes Joel muster up a tut. But maybe, just maybe, you mean it.
---
You feel drops scatter from the dark black clouds overhead as you rush out to the truck, feeling the cold rain splash onto the exposed skin of your thighs.
Joel’s hot on your heels, doing his little side hop down the stairs and jogging lightly with his arms tucked into his sides. He’s already tossed you the keys to his truck. His body hovers over yours and shields the raindrops from landing on your head as you fiddle with unlocking the truck door. 
“Any day now.”
His babbling thwarts your concentration. 
“Fuck off, it’s like- rusted shut.” You tease before giving the handle one large tug, and it gives way with a creak. You slip in, dress hem tangling up on your upper thighs. Your hand flies to fix it instinctually, but you slow down when you see how adamantly Joel admires the exposed skin.
When you two make eye contact, he’s already cleared his throat and put the key in the ignition. He cranes his neck back to look out the rearview window, left hand cranking the wheel with precision while his right arm wraps around the back of your headrest. You swallow the lump in your throat, watching Joel reverse out of the bar’s parking lot and back onto the main road.
Your heart thumps, and you think he can hear it because his eyes are on yours when he turns back around. Magnetizing. And you have a hard time facing him without feeling a little shy. Because you’re thinking incredibly naughty things now. 
On the drive home, the rain pelts the truck and hard. Joel’s wimpy wipers are working at full speed. He’s not concerned because he knows these streets with his eyes closed. He turns up the radio a little bit to drown out the rain. He does it for you to ease your nerves. 
“You’re quiet.” He murmurs, his eyes still on the murky road in front of him. 
You can’t help but be quiet. He looks so fucking hot. As dim streaks of lightning skitter across the sky, you see the silver hairs in his mustache and beard. His rain-dampened curls are recoiling, fresh, and wavy. His thick neck was lined with strong veins and muscle.
“So are you.” You murmur back. 
His eyes catch you in sneaky glances. Your hair, pretty and dry since he shielded you in the bar’s parking lot. Dress half rumpled up your thighs, smooth skin of your legs exposed to his wandering pupils. 
The truck suddenly shifts, veering off the main road.  
“Woah,” you gasp, thinking the truck had slid at first. But Joel’s foot was still on the gas, cautiously guiding you off to a side road. You look around, covered by darkness and trees that shield your existence but do little to veil the obscene thoughts racing through your head. 
Joel finally throws the truck into a parked position, your eyes watching as his hand snaps the keys out of the ignition. 
He looks over at you expectantly. And you just deadpan. 
“Get over here." He says between gritted teeth, voice drenched in lust as he snaps off his seatbelt and then your own.
His large hands pull you in as soon as you’re free. You don’t waste another minute, straddling his lap and resting between him and his steering wheel.  
You clutch the collar of his dark green button-up, tugging him by his neck into your kiss. It’s messy and desperate, but you've wanted to taste him since dinner. His greedy hands are wrinkling your dress. The cold air tickles your warm thighs, and you whimper into his mouth. 
Joel’s kisses are rough but fluent; he speaks the language of your lips. You take a moment to admire how different the two of you are and how it feels like he’s the key to your lock. 
His warm palms slip up the front of your thighs as he kisses you, hasty and happy. He takes the hem of your dress with him. Joel is as warm as a furnace. He’s heating you from the inside out as your core begins to ache for him.
He pauses the kiss, large palm coming up to cup your cheek as his thumb traces along your lower lip. You take the time to catch your breath, feeling his own fog against the window next to you. 
“Not exactly the most romantic spot.” His eyes shift with lust-filled guilt. “M’sorry.” 
You work up a smile, leaning in to gently kiss his cheek and up his cheekbone. 
“It’s okay. We’re not romantic.” Your clarification feels like a lie. He doesn’t need to know that. 
The rain outside becomes blurred, and Joel’s looking through you again. Right through you. Your chest pounds under his watchful eyes. He sucks in the side of his cheeks, looks you up and down your face. 
Don’t lie to me. 
Don’t make me tell you the truth.
He decides to let you move on unscathed, your thighs clamping around his own with your knees at either side of his hips. His worry lines are stamped into his forehead as he looks over you cautiously. 
You break into a smile, unable to stand him looking at you like you’re a lost puppy. “Joel,” you whisper into his ear, soft lips giving his ear a kiss as your nose lightly brushes against his soft curls. Your voice drops to a whisper, sweet and divine. “Don’t make me beg, Mr. Miller.” 
Your lips suckle his earlobe and cast your tongue along the curve while his fingertips immediately dig deeper into the flesh of your hips. The sensation makes his cock twitch in his jeans. 
You smirk as you grind your hips into his lap, a suppressed grunt leaving his parted lips. He’s into it. “You like this, Mr. Miller?” Your words are murmured against the shell of his ear, teeth gently catching his earlobe and lightly tugging. 
Your words along with the rhythm of your hips over his lap have him in a tailspin. 
“Knock it off.” He warns, teeth gritted, a low growl emitting from his throat while he grips you at the waist to pause any movement. He looks so sexy snarling at you like this. Your hand reaches between you two, palming against his cock until you feel it swell into the heart of your hand. 
Joel is lazily planting kisses on the soft skin of your neck, he’s distracted by how good your hand feels. 
You take turns half undressing one another. Joel pushes your dress up to your waist and loops his index finger into the band of your panties. He guides them down with your assistance. You kick the material off your ankles and move to pop open each button of his long sleeve. He goes to shrug it off, but you smile and tighten your hold on the collar. 
“I like it on. Just wanna see your chest hair.” 
His mouth tilts into a crooked smirk.
“‘lright, then. Good to know.” He leans back in and places messy kisses on your exposed neck. You can feel how badly he wants to sink his teeth in, but you share the mutual rule of keeping those things below the collar. Out of sight, out of other people’s nosy minds. 
You struggle to admit that jimmying open his belt at this angle was pissing you off. You’re holding your breath until it clicks open, and you let out a sigh of relief. So does Joel. 
A gasp leaves your lips as Joel lifts the both of you up purely with the strength of his hips, a low grunt leaving his pouted lips as he pushes his jeans down to his knees, along with his boxers. You sit back down over him and feel his heavy shaft pressing against your slick center. His girth makes you whimper. 
The rhythm of the rain eases your racing heart. You take Joel’s pulsing member into your slightly shaky hand. 
“Nervous?” It’s not cocky or concerned, just curious. 
“M’not nervous.” You mutter, starting to pump his cock to get him to shut up. And it works. For a minute. 
His head falls back into the seat as he watches you in admiration, his own hand wandering between your spread legs and gliding two fingers through your slick. His forefinger grazes against your clit, and he has you whimpering again. 
“S’okay to be nervous.” His thumb slowly starts delicate circles into your bundle of nerves, and now he’s got your legs quivering. 
You’re chewing at the inside of your cheek, shifty eyes meeting his. You pace your words this time. “I’m not nervous, Joel.” You pull away from him to create a line of spit from your mouth, landing on his pink tip already drizzling in precum. You swallow your nerve and bring yourself to meet his eyes. “Not with you.” 
The mutual understanding links the two of you together, bound to the agreement in silence. You have a burning desire for one another. You’re scared, and he knows it. You push him to the limits, his heart beats for you. 
Steam fogs the windows of Joel’s truck. The rain dances a fine line between pounding and pouring to slow and subtle. 
Joel’s kisses lull you into a peaceful existence. You take off your dress, unable to stand anything between you and Joel. He’s warm as he wraps his arms around you, your tits flush against his thick chest. 
You line him up by his base, Joel’s trying to hold himself still under you. You’re focusing hard, and he kisses your temple to ease your thoughts. He murmurs something, but you’re too busy concentrating. 
His pink tip meets your warm flesh, and his tip slowly parts your walls. He’s seething between his teeth, how tight you are washes pleasure over his face. He wants you to go slow. You don’t want him to go easy on you. You can’t help but let his name tumble from your lips in desperation. 
“Joel,” you whine, one hand clenching the fabric of his button-up by his shoulder while the other still weakly holds his base. 
“M’here, baby.”
He’s rubbing soothing circles in your hips with his forefingers, trying to distract you from the stretch he’s creating inside you. 
His breaths are coming out in hot puffs. The truck isn’t cold anymore, in fact, it’s only steaming up. 
“So- fuckin’- tight.” He murmurs, eyebrows knitted together as his jaw was dropped open. 
It was sharp at first, but the further you sank over him, the more you couldn’t contain yourself. As soon as his balls were flushed against your core, you were kissing him. Hot and heavy, desperate and needy, can’t get enough of each other sort of kisses. One of his hands holds the back of your head to keep you close while your fingers are delicately feeling up his chest and mazing through salt and pepper hair. 
You smirk lazily against his lips, pulling away to rest your head on his shoulder. With this leverage, you start to roll your hips down onto his. Joel’s hands assist, squeezing your ass and guiding you smoothly up and down his shaft. You’re both moaning one another’s names, hazy eyes watching each other as long as they can before eventually drifting closed. 
You wished you weren’t fucking in his truck, your riding skills were a lot better than this, but if you try and pop up, your head will just smack into the roof. And he’ll make fun of you for as long as he knows you. 
“God- feel so good, Joel.” 
You’re panting already a few minutes in. You don’t want Joel to think you can’t do this, you don’t want his help. But your body is crammed in limited quarters, and you’re already sweating. 
He feels good. You wonder how long it’s been since he’s had sex. He’s not exactly the most outgoing of gentlemen. Thinking about him being with other women, maybe even women his age stirs a weird pit inside your stomach. 
One hand steadies itself on Joel’s forearm while the other gently clutches his cheek. You leave a messy moan against his ear. 
“Do you like fucking girls half your age, Mr. Miller?” You ask with a teasing smirk, messy kisses against his stubble and his ear ensuing. 
He’s grunting every time you throw yourself back into him, skin clapping against his thighs, his hands slipping from your hips to your ass and squeezing the juicy flesh. “-like fuckin’ you.” 
A low, extended groan leaves his lips as he holds your hips down, filling you full and having you sit with it. You throw your head back, and your eyes shudder closed with a loud moan occupying the truck. 
You tell yourself that you’re both just fuck happy. You can worry about the depth of Joel’s words later. He feels too good inside of you for the first time to give a shit.
Joel’s thrusts bring you back to life, hand landing against his window and leaving a print mark against the steamy glass. 
Joel senses your languid movements. He thinks you look pretty being fucked in his trunk during a thunderstorm. The darkness wraps the both of you up, only seeing flashes of each other’s features. He combs his large hand into your hair, catching your striking features with his hooded eyes. The slope of your nose. The curvature of your collarbones. Your pretty lips that he can’t stop staring at. 
Joel enjoys the control too much for you to be on top for a second longer. 
You collapse onto the truck’s long leather seat, lips parting in surprise as he maneuvers you to lie back without slipping from your entrance. 
“H-Holy fuck, Joel-” You’re breathless. 
Joel’s jaw clicks tighter as he flattens one of his large palms beside your head for leverage, hovering over you as he begins to methodically snap his hips into yours. Your desperate cries for more fill the truck. 
Both of you are horridly cursing, some in the form of whines and moans and others in the form of whispered grunts. 
Fuckin Christ-
Holy shit, Joel, please-
Feel so god damn good, princess-
Oh f- fuck me Joel, fuck me!
You’re already feeling the knots in your stomach tether tighter and tighter together, back arching as your chest brushes against his nose. 
Joel takes the opportunity and licks a hot stripe between your breasts. You know he tastes your glistening sweat, but the trail from his tongue makes you clench tighter around him. 
You catch Joel’s unfiltered groan in your mouth, his forehead resting against yours as his amber eyes grace yours. 
He’s close, you can see it in the way his features contort and his thrusts become more unpredictable. You had no idea he could fuck this good. 
Joel brings a hand up to your lips and offers you two fingers. You whimper but reluctantly take them past your mouth. You suckle and lather your tongue up and down each digit, it makes his cock twitch inside of you. 
He plucks his fingers free with a pop, a trail of spit extending from your bottom lip to your chin as he reaches between you both. 
Finding your swollen bundle of nerves doesn’t take him more than a second. You were so turned on it was almost painful. 
Joel’s tip sweetly kisses your cervix at this angle, and you are so close to spilling over. Your hands cup his face, pulling him into you as you share a messy kiss. You think about how scared you were to kiss him before, but now it makes you feel a sense of protection and safety. You wrap your arms around his neck, you need him close. 
“Joel,” you whimper, clenching your eyes closed and dropping your jaw as he finds the perfect rhythm circling your clit. 
“Can’t hear ya, baby,” He grunts into your ear. You can feel him tiredly smirking against your cheek, knowing he’s fucking you so good you’re struggling to find the words. 
“Fuck,” you mutter, your legs clenching tighter at the sides of his hips. “M’on birth control, finish inside me,” you whisper against his ear. 
You can hear him let out a short, breathy chuckle against your ear. It only drives him more, knowing he can fill you up. 
“Y’sure, sweetheart?” 
“Want to?” 
His teeth are gritted as he growls into your ear. “Course I wanna fill your sweet cunt up.” 
It was hopeless after that. 
A crack of thunder and a strike of lightning conspire, your view of Joel illuminating his gorgeous face in a white-silver flash. 
The tight coils inside you snap free, a broken moan of his name being the last thing you remember saying before white stars filled your vision. Your hold on Joel loosens as your orgasm crashes through you ungracefully, making you twitch and rut your hips below him. 
His fingers and his thrusts don’t stop. He rides out your orgasm, following suit until he flushes his hips against yours and lets out a heavenly groan of your name. You’re still under him, vision blurry and hearing fuzzy. He finds solace in the crook of your neck, nuzzling a home for himself in the space and losing himself deep inside you. 
His body shudders lightly as he finishes, spilling white streams into you for who knows how long. Your hand is gently stroking the hair at the back of his head, fingers combing through dark curls as he breathes hot air against your neck. 
You both slowly blink back to life. He’s complimenting you, but you’re too blissed out to hear the details. 
So good, baby… Such a pretty fuckin’ girl... So lucky. 
Joel tuts softly as he attempts to free his softened length, but you whine and tighten your legs around his hips to keep him stationary. 
Your eyelashes flutter as you feel gentle kisses by the corners of your eyes, tiredly smiling as you open them before slowly sitting up onto your elbows. Joel takes the opportunity to pull out and yank his boxers and jeans back into place, securing his belt last. 
He still keeps his shirt unbuttoned for you, partially because you have a hold on a random corner to keep it so. 
With the absence of your pants hotboxing the truck, you slip back into your dress with a light shudder. You reach past Joel’s leg to retrieve your panties and pull them up your stems to keep his spillage to a minimum. 
“Good?” He asks, a smile slowly growing on your lips. He looked so fucked out. You both probably did. You attempt to fix Joel’s hair, and he takes his thumb to swipe away the saliva trail on your chin. 
“Good.” You agree. Quiet and sapped, but good. 
You force Joel to play a few games of tic-tac-toe on the foggy glass before the storms lighten up, and you can actually see more than a few feet in front of the road. 
You’re picking at the skin around your nails the entire drive home. So many questions compile in your worn-out brain. 
What if your parents noticed you were gone? What if they were awake, waiting for you by the kitchen window, and they see you slip out of Joel’s truck? Try explaining yourself after that one. 
As Joel pulls into his driveway, you observe the lake house is still dark and silent. Empty but also not. Joel’s warm palm is on your leg. It draws your attention away from the window, focusing just on him. 
“Joel?”
“Hm?” 
You shift your jaw before you lay your head back against the headrest, gentle pitter patters of the last rain cloud splashing on the window. 
“What do you do when you’re not working? Like on that Saturday when I talked to you at your truck.” 
He musters up a half-mouth smirk. “Didn’t do much talkin’ that I recall.” 
You roll your eyes and slam a closed fist against his shoulder. It barely rocks his arm, let alone his body. “M’serious.” 
He lets out a long sigh and looks out the windshield. “I do stuff around town or-  for the town.”
He’s so hard to push details out of. He’s like a jammed stapler. 
“Go on. So, like, volunteering?”
Joel rolls his eyes and shrugs. “S’not really like that.”
“That’s what it sounds like.” 
He doesn’t say anything, just sort of starts smiling. “Just like keeping myself busy. But now I have you on my plate.” He teased. Your chest felt warm, knowing he kept a place for you in his hectic life. 
“What sort of stuff are you working on right now?” 
He takes a long, deep breath through his nose. You can hear it whistle before he lets it all out of his mouth, followed by clearing his throat. 
“Y’know that old church past that big field on the east side of Danbury?” 
You mindlessly shake your head and shrug. 
“When I was a kid, I used t’go to that church-”
“For God?” You can’t help but blurt it out in shock. 
He narrows his eyes on you and smirks.
“M’not exactly the Godly type.” You look over his chiseled jawline and beautiful, robust features. You’d have to disagree. He looked like one of God’s favorites. 
“So.. why are you trying to fix an old church?”
Joel slowly smiles, eyes mindlessly on the dashboard of his truck before he answers. “I have a thing for the broken, used, and abandoned.” 
Your head cocks to the side, and you give him a look, pressing him for an honest answer. Or maybe it was an honest answer, and you’re just looking for a better answer. 
He shuffles around in his seat before he continues, hand still aimlessly circling on your thigh. “It wasn’t operable when I was a kid, just rundown, abandoned. There used to be a stained glass mural on the-uh... east-facing wall. So when the sun came up through it, the whole place just- lit up.” He pauses and shifts his focus to you. 
“Now, y’know, it’s fallin’ apart. Dumb kids throwin’ rocks at it and chipping away the glass, age makin’ it all dust-covered.” Joel shrugs and falls back into his closed pit of secrecy. 
“So… you’re fixing up the town.”
A pause. “More or less.” 
“You know how to make a stained glass mural?”
He shakes his head and purses his lips. “No. But I can figure it out.” 
You twist your lips and slowly climb over his lap once more. His eyes watch you curiously while his hands settle on your hips. You cup either side of his neck, fingertips lightly brushing up against messy curls. 
“Can I see this mural you’re working on?” 
He takes a long time to answer. So much dead silence fills the truck you start to feel a bit awkward about asking, like maybe it was too far. 
“Please.” You ask or tell rather. You kiss his lips lightly to try and sway his pending decision. “I won’t judge, I think it’s cool.”
“Cool?” He instantly chirps, cocking an eyebrow up at you. 
“I didn’t say you were cool-”
“You most certainly did.” 
You’re shaking your head, and his pointer finger is prodding into your side to get under your skin. “I said that it’s cool. The stained glass stuff, that is what is cool.” 
He’s already sneering at you. “Whatever you say, princess.” You can feel your cheeks singe with heat. Your hand anxiously scrabbles for the door handle, letting the rusty door creak open for your exit.
Sneakers scrape gravel after you climb out of Joel’s lap, his boots landing suit. 
He smoothes a hand down your dress, your eyes watch before you face him. 
“You gonna be alright?” Joel's face is laced with slight concern, his head cocking past you and looking to the house. 
You shrug and shake your head. “Yeah. We’ve had this fight before, and we’ll have it again.” 
He doesn’t seem satisfied with the answer. He’s teetering on his heels as a stray raindrop lands on your cheek. 
“You can..” He trails off as his thumb comes up and brushes away the droplet, hand lingering before he cups your cheek. “Y’know, can always stay with us if you need a break. M’sure Sarah would love the company.” And so would he. 
Your eyes soften, the gesture warm and safe. You couldn’t even imagine the trouble you’d stir up at Joel’s house. Sure, you could occupy yourself with Sarah when she returned from camping, but what would you and Joel do? Well, besides the obvious…
Your lips curl into a tight smile, not wanting him to reel in his invite out of pure bashfulness. 
“Thank you. I’ll keep it in mind.” Your eyes are on his until he sighs, his shoulders reset into that of a broad lumberjack once more. His eyes looked like they were scheming. It’s fast, like a flash, and before you know it, the look is gone. 
“Take care of yourself.” He leans down and plants a kiss on the crown of your head, thumb skimming up the line of your cheekbone. Suddenly, your heart is racing again. 
You cup his cheeks and pull him down for a real goodbye kiss, two sets of pouted lips against one another, unwilling to let go until you have to. 
---
“What are you doing after work?” You’re on a call with Joel, phone pressed between your ear and hunched shoulder. 
“What are you wearing right now?” He taunts, voice crackling in and out of connection since he was currently working at a house out of town. 
“Ha.” You deadpan, closing the sliding glass door behind you as you step back into the empty lake house, skin sweltering from being in the sun for the better half of the afternoon reading on the dock. “No, really, I could use your help.”
The phone volume shrills in your ear as you hear an electric saw roar to life, Joel cursing repeatedly as he walks away from all the noise.  “Jesus fuckin-.. so damn lou- Can you hear me better?” 
Once the saw dulled, you put the phone back to your ear.  “Yeah.”
“What do you need help with?” His voice sounds a little preoccupied like he’s trying to focus on you, but he’s got a million things running through his head. 
“My window.” You say with a frown, stepping into your bedroom and cursing at the sight of it. “Won’t open. Maybe you can crack it open with some of your handy dandy tools.”
You smile as he musters up a little laugh at your hardware knowledge or lack thereof. “I don’t know about today, baby.” 
“You are the property maintenance guy for our lakehouse now, right? You have a duty to help me.” You tease, stepping back outside with a fresh bottle of water and an apple. Your teeth pierce the skin, and the apple’s juices gush past your lips. 
“Jesus, fine. I’ll be over. I’m almost done.”
You purse your lips to hide your smirk. God, he can’t even see you, but you don’t want him to know he’s got you flustered. 
“Parents are running errands today... If that’s extra incentive for you to hurry up.” 
Joel pauses on the other end. He’s probably got that stupid smirk on his face. “In that case, I’ll leave now.”
“I knew you’d see things my way. Thank youuu.” You playfully coo. 
Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever.
An hour later, Joel’s outside your window while you assist from the inside. His face is twisted in concentration, eyes narrowed on a misaligned hinge that he works free with a screwdriver, realigns, then screws tight into its proper place. 
He looks stupid hot so focused like this. Tanned skin, hair a little dusty from work. The veins in his forearm were bulging as he uses pressure to keep the hinge in place. You had to blink a few times to keep yourself from staring. He feels it. 
“Can I help you?” His voice was thick and echoing since he was speaking to you between a glass pane. 
You bite back a smirk and shake your head. 
He pulls off the hinge and nods, pats it a few times before looking at you and giving you a thumbs up. 
You decide to let him come inside before you open the window yourself, twisting at the string of your bikini bottom as you wait. He took in your appearance as soon as he parked in the driveway. 
“What?”
“...Nothin’. Like the outfit.”
“Joel, I was sunbathing. And reading. It wasn’t an intended distraction.” It was. 
“Mhm.”
Joel appears at the entrance of your bedroom. You silently curse yourself for not updating it more. It still looked like a sixteen-year-old fangirl lived in it. 
He appreciates the posters and magazines, checking his handiwork at the window. 
“Wanna give it a go? Open it?” 
You eagerly smile and step up to the window, playfully tugging on it and heaving. 
“I-.. It’s still stuck.” You say with a frown. “Joel, you said you fixed it.”
“What? Shouldn’t be-” He’s already got his hands on the frame and tugs, feeling it easily slip up and open. You’re giggling as his face deadpans. 
“You think you’re so funny.” He taunts, his body turning towards you as he chucks his tools haphazardly on your bed. You’re already attempting to take leaps and bounds away from Joel, but his arms are long, and so are his strides. 
His rough hands capture you by your waist, dusty and calloused fingers ghosting over your warm skin. 
Joel’s lips eagerly greet yours, both of you grinning into the kiss. It’s slow as you let it envelop you. Your heart races. He’s not supposed to be here, your parents could come home any time now.  
You bite down on your lower lip, feeling butterflies in your stomach as he backs you up against your wall, foreheads gently pressed together. His eyes flick behind you, and your head follows his gaze. 
“Boybands, huh?”
You roll your eyes and smirk, fingers moving to the button of his jeans. 
“Shut up, Joel. Leave the boybands out of it.” 
A car door slamming catches both of your attention. Heads whip on instinct, eyes wide like a deer in headlights. Your parents are home, and Joel’s half-hard in your palm. 
“Oh, shit.” You curse. 
Joel’s already moving, grabbing his tools off your bed, and adjusting his jeans. “Lemme handle it.” Your heart pounds as you and Joel greet your parents at the door. They walk in with fresh shopping bags. A cheesy sign for the living room sticks out from one of them. 
“Joel?” They both ask in unison, looking between the man beside you and you in your bikini. Your mother’s face lightly flushes. 
“Hey, Joel! Good to see ya!” Your father sets the bags on the table and grabs a beer from the fridge. You shift on your feet and just let Joel lead. 
Your dad’s oblivious, your mother is more curious
“What are you... What are you doing here?” She tries to ask casually with a little smile. 
Joel raises his screwdriver, strategically keeping the toolbag in front of his lower half. You try not to smirk. 
“Was fixin’ your daughter’s jammed window.”
Your mother's face softens before she smiles. “Y’know, that thing has been jammed for… years. Thank you.”
You give him a tight-lipped smile and nod. “Yes. Thank you, Mr. Miller.” The light glare he sends you means you’ll pay for that one later. Joel clears his throat and nods, too. He turns to you now, and you share a look. 
“Just… let me know if it happens again. Might need to replace the hinge entirely. Small piece of it could be broken, might be why it keeps slippin’ out of place.”
“Yeah. For sure. Thanks.” 
You walk past your mother and open the door from him, but he still stands between your parents. What the hell is he doing?
“While I have you both, I was just tellin’ your daughter ‘bout a business trip I have comin’ up.” Huh? “ It’s not for Miller Contracting. It’s more for the town. I’m gettin’ materials for the old church-”
“Oh, the one with the broken stained glass mural on the east side of town?” Your mother chirps in. “We just drove past it. Just saying how someone needs to fix it up.” Joel’s lightly nodding to your mother’s words, her face soft as she listens to him with curiosity. 
“Well, I was tellin’ her about it ‘cause I could use some help getting materials from a supplier in Houston. I’d normally ask Sarah to tag along and help, but she said she’s got some graduation parties next weekend that she doesn’t wanna miss. Would it be alright if-”
“Oh, of course! Yes, please, if you need her help and she wants to go, she’s all yours.” 
Your eyes are wide, trying not to seem too shocked by Joel secretly sweeping you out from under your parents without them even noticing. 
Joel turns to you, eyebrow cocked.  “That okay with you? Next weekend. Friday to Sunday sort’f thing.” 
A whole weekend alone with Joel? Your insides are bursting, but you have to seem apathetic. 
“Mhm. Sure.” 
Joel sneaks you a private smile. “Really appreciate it. Ya’ll have a good rest of your evenin’.” And with that, he’s out the front door. 
You couldn’t believe what just happened. 
You try to act casual before you make it off to your room, but your mother’s voice pulls you to a halt. 
“Ah-ah, not so fast. Back it up.”
You quietly sigh before coming back to the main part of the kitchen. She narrows her eyes on you and lightly crosses her arms. Your fight with her from yesterday is still fresh, and it makes holding prolonged eye contact difficult. 
“Are you seeing a boy?”
Your eyes widen on instinct. Your dad pauses the sip of his beer and watches you carefully. You try to hold together a poker face as best as you can, but you’re worried your shock is already seeping through. 
“Wha- A boy? Why would you think that?” The laugh you force out sounds too fake. And you’re a terrible liar.  You feel so hot all of a sudden. You wished Joel was still here to talk you in and out of shit. It was a skill of his you’d surely have to learn. 
“Well, we heard the door close really late last night after you walked Joel out. We were just wondering if... You know, there’s a special someone that you’re seeing.” Of course, she hoped you would tie yourself down to someone in Texas. 
“Yeah, did a boy pick you up after dinner or somethin’?” Your father presses, eyes narrowing protectively over you. “You seein’ a boy or not, honey?”
You didn’t want to lie, but you certainly weren’t ready to tell them the truth about you and Joel. 
“Uhm.” Your brain scrabbles for an answer and ultimately chooses poorly. “Sorta. I don’t know. Kind of?” 
Your mother tightens her lips in a smile and nods a little. “We’ll let it go for now, but-”
“God- Mom, please.” You groan and put your face in your hands, closing your eyes and wishing this nightmare was over. 
“But,” she annoyingly emphasizes, “If it gets serious, we want to meet this young man.” She says with a firm nod before turning back to your father and putting away the items in their shopping bags. 
Meet him? They want to meet the boy you’re seeing? What will they do when they find out the boy is actually a full-grown man, a forty-something-year-old with a teenage daughter? And that man was not only their friend and neighbor but Joel fucking Miller. Fuck. Your luck was running out. 
---
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mynameismckenziemae · 4 months ago
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A Little Bit Stronger
Part 5
(previous part here, next part here)
Bradley Rooster Bradshaw x OFC
Summary: Your feelings for Bradley get deeper as the time passes.
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Just like everything else I write/post: this story is for 18+ only. MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. It will contain smut, adult themes, situations and language. Please also note this story may be triggering due to the topic of domestic abuse (physical, emotional, sexual) violence-feel free to message me with any questions before reading.
Warnings: Smut, oversharing, dry humping, dirty talk, etc.
•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•
You call Reese while you change into something more comfortable to let her know the good news. By the time you make it downstairs, Bradley’s already outside.
He’s already got a beer for you waiting while he tosses a ball for Hank from his chair.
You don’t miss the way his gaze lingers on your bare legs as you cross them.
Instead of asking about the divorce, he asks you about your parents and growing up. In turn, he tells you about Carole and Goose and losing them both so young. You learn more about the people you met last weekend at the party, how Reese’s in-laws were like second parents to him growing him, and how Ice, Penny, and Mav all stepped up too.
“You’re telling me I met the admiral and didn’t even realize it?” Your eyes widen as you try to remember your introduction, hoping you didn’t make a fool of yourself.
“Yeah,” he laughs, “Sorry, I should’ve told you, but I didn’t want to make you more nervous. He’s unintentionally intimidating as is.”
“Just a little,” you say, remembering how true that was.
“He’s extremely observant too; never let me get away with anything when I was a teenager; always saw right through it when I’d lie to my mom.”
“Maybe you’re just a bad liar,” you tease.
He smiles and shrugs, “You’re not wrong, Andy was much better at thinking on the fly to get out of trouble when we were younger.”
The conversation takes a turn toward what it was like growing up with Reese’s late husband. Your heart breaks when he tells you about how it was more than losing his best friend but losing his brother too.
“…and then,” he laughs without mirth before taking a heavy drink of beer, “I kissed his wife on the first anniversary of his death. We were both drunk, like…really drunk. Reese was such a mess that night; I’d never seen her like that. She’s always been so put-together, even with having a baby. But she had just stopped breastfeeding Drew and was so thin from all the stress. She was crying because she missed Andy, crying and saying it was a good thing she never wanted to date again because who would want someone that looked like her? And that just killed me. Andy would’ve hated her talking about herself like that…so I kissed her.”
“What did she do?” You ask, curiously; knowing grief is fickle.
“Kissed me back,” he sighs, “it was like 10 seconds. I came to my senses and pulled away. Then she laughed,” he chuckles, “and I started to cry. I don’t see her that way at all. Sure, she’s a beautiful woman but…no,” he scrunches his nose in disgust, making you smile. “God, I still feel bad about it. She and I have never talked about it since.”
“I wouldn’t beat yourself up over it,” you reply, “and from what I’ve heard about Andy from you and Reese? He wouldn’t either. Grief makes you do things you normally wouldn’t. Like staying in an abusive relationship.”
“That’s different,” he argues, handing you a third beer.
“Not really,” you sigh, “I’d taken care of countless abused women in the ER, begged them to get help, testified in court against their abusers, but when it started happening to me? I did nothing, I was numb from the grief of losing my family and it was like he knew…he knew could get away with it when I was already down.”
“But you did do something,” he argues, “you did leave him.”
You nod, “Should’ve done it sooner, but I did.”
“Cheers to that,” he nods, clinking his bottle to yours. “So what are you gonna do now as a single woman? Go on a blind date? Or to that beach he always said was too far?”
“Maybe go to New York City, or spend a week at the spa and come back knocked-out pretty,” you smile as you quote George Strait too.
“You don’t need a week at the spa for that,” he replies before taking a long pull of his beer.
You give him a small smile before looking away, hiding the heat that rises to your face at his compliment.
•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•
“I think I should eat something before I fall asleep,” you mumble after finishing your 5th beer, well past tipsy and feeling good, “or I’m not gonna regret it in the morning.”
“I ordered pizza a few minutes ago,” Bradley smiles as he holds up his phone, “remember? I asked you what you like?”
“Oh.” You snort and shake your head. “Okay, yeah I remember now. God, I love pizza.”
He laughs, “You said that too.”
“That’s what I’m gonna do now that I’m single, eat lots of pizza, ice cream, cake, drink beer. I really do want to take a vacation too. Oh, and I decided I’m gonna order a vibrator…”
Bradley chokes on his drink but you fail to notice.
“I heard good things about a rose one? I don’t know, I’ll have to do some research first. There’s so many options. Maybe I’ll get more than one. Hey, are you okay?” You smack a sputtering Bradley on the back a few times.
“Thanks,” he wheezes, “I’m good, I think the pizzas here.”
“I can get it-whoa,” you stand up a bit too quickly but he’s there, steadying you gently by your arm.
“Thanks,” you look up into those deep brown eyes. You don’t stop your hand from reaching up to cup his jaw to run your thumb over the scars there, “You’re so…”
Beautiful, charming, funny, sweet, kind, patient…
You don’t say any of that though, and instead rock up on your tiptoes for a kiss just as he begins to lean in too.
But Hank starts barking at the doorbell when your lips are a just hairsbreadth away, startling you both.
“I’ll just…” Bradley nearly trips as he steps away, hitting his heel on the leg of the chair, “go get that.”
“Uh yeah, okay,” you say, tucking your hair behind your ear. “I’ll just be out here?”
“Sounds good,” you nod, sitting back down as your heart races in your chest.
•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•
Neither of you brings up the near kiss again. Not that night, not in the weeks that follow, nor when summer turns into fall and fall turns into early winter.
There hasn’t been another word or sighting of Chad and you find yourself hopeful that he might actually leave you alone for good. You also start seeing a therapist once a week and begin to feel like you’re starting to heal.
While still on the lookout for an apartment, you haven’t had any luck; not that you’re truly trying that hard.
Living with Bradley feels like home; more than the last one ever did.
Not only does he keep the house clean and treat Hank like he would his own; but he also does small things; things that make your tummy flutter. Like having your favorite ice cream always stocked in the freezer and bringing home a plant a few days after hearing you mention to Reese you were thinking of getting one.
You’ve gone out with Reese and Jake more times than you can count and out to a movie alone once or twice. You’ve even been included on Drew and Bradley’s boys' night “as long as you don’t tell my mom.”
It almost feels like you’re dating without the intimacy.
But you want the intimacy. You want the sex. Hearing Bradley getting off to the thought of you had awakened the libido you thought no longer existed.
It’s like he knows it too; mowing the lawn without a shirt, groaning loudly while lifting weights, sending heated glances your way when you stretch after a run, letting his hand linger on your lower back when he passes you in the kitchen.
While you were completely mortified at your drunk self for telling Bradley, you still ordered a vibrator the next day.
And have used it nearly every day in the 5 months since.
•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•
Finished with work early on a rainy Friday afternoon, you change and walk through the bathroom to hit the treadmill in an attempt to wear yourself out before you wear out the batteries.
It doesn’t work.
You’re just as horny as you were before but now you’re tired and your right hamstring is spasming.
“Shae?” Bradley calls from the front door, “You here?”
“Yeah,” you try to keep your voice even as the back of your leg tightens further, “I’m up here. Just work-fuck! Working out.”
“Are you okay?” You heat him set down his keys and hurry up the stairs.
“Fine,” you grit out, “just a leg cramp.”
He stops by the door, eyes widening at the sight of you lying on the floor, clad in only a sports bra and tight short shorts. Your eyes do a perusal of their own, catching the dog tags lying against his white undershirt, his flight suit unzipped and tied loosely around his waist.
He looks so fucking good.
“Here,” his voice is low and husky as he kneels beside you, “try to straighten your leg.”
Your breath hitches as you feel his big, calloused hands on your thigh and ankle as he tries to help.
“Good,” he praises as your leg shakes but eventually straightens, “‘atta girl.”
Oh God.
You close your eyes as you whimper, nipples straining against the thin material of your sports bra while your pussy pulses with need.
“I know it hurts, just try to relax,” he murmurs, gently putting pressure on the ball of your foot, “you can take it, just let me stretch you.”
“Fuck,” you breathe, arousal soaking your shorts as you picture him saying those same words in a much different context.
“Here,” he says as he shifts, “put your leg up here. Yeah, like that,” he hums as you prop your ankle on his shoulder, and he leans forward, “That feel good?”
When you open your eyes he’s mere inches from your face. He’s studying your face, looking for any sign of discomfort. But the only discomfort you feel now is between your legs.
“So good,” you whisper hoarsely. His eyes meet yours and darken in realization.
You let your leg fall from his shoulder as your fingers find his dog tags, toying with them before gripping them tightly.
Your head lifts as he drops, lips almost meeting in the middle.
He softly brushes your lips over yours; once, twice before claiming them in a kiss. He’s gentle, a little tentative at first, giving you a chance to stop this.
But you don’t want to stop.
Instead, you nip his lower lip, releasing him when he shivers. He sets his hand beside your head, caging you between his strong arms. When you tug on the tags still in your hand, he takes the hint.
The constant noise in your brain quiets as he claims your lips. It could be minutes, it could be hours that pass as months of longing and tension are poured into the kiss the two of you share.
Finally…yet, you want more.
He must be thinking the same since he shifts as you pull; both gasping when he lands in the cradle of your hips.
Your eyes widen in realization as you feel him hot and hard against where you want him most.
“That’s…” you trail off when he gently thrusts, his flight suit shifting lower on his hips so the thin cotton of his boxerbriefs and your shorts separate you, “That’s why you’re called Rooster.”
He chuckles lowly by your ear while angling his hips so you feel all of him.
Yep. That’s why he’s called Rooster.
His mustache brushes the sensitive skin of your neck, and his breath catches as you wrap your legs around his waist.
A moan escapes as you break from his hips to get more air, yet you tighten the hold your legs have on him before guiding him over your clit faster and faster.
“Wait-wai-fuck,” he’s trying to say something into your neck but doesn’t fight your rhythm, instead leaning into it and giving up with a sweet, defeated sigh.
You’re lightheaded from it all; his clean-sweet and jet-fuel smell, the sounds you’re pulling from him, his ruddy-red cheeks, the building pleasure between your thighs.
“I-, I’m-,” you pant, unable to form the words as you approach the edge.
“I know,” he nods into your neck, sounding wrecked as he sloppily kisses your neck, “I know, sweetheart. Me too.”
You gasp softly, hands tightening in his hair as you shudder through your release, vaguely registering Bradley’s low groan in your ear as his cock twitches as he coats the of his boxer briefs.
He presses a quick kiss to your forehead before rolling beside you. His hand finds yours as you both catch your breath.
•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•
Unease and embarrassment at your behavior begin to creep in with the quiet until Bradley breaks the rising tension.
“That was…really hot,” he laughs but then cringes, “and embarrassingly fast.
You can’t help but laugh too, “It’s okay. I liked it.”
“I really like you, Shae,” he turns his head to smile at you.
“I-“ you hesitate, but then remember the conversation with your therapist earlier this week about him.
“I like him,” you admit, “but it’s…isn’t it too soon?”
“That I can’t say,” she replies, “but what I can say is you’re doing everything you should be; seeking help to work through this, taking care of yourself, no longer blaming yourself for the abuse, and you also you started grieving marriage long before it was officially over.”
You nod. It’s true; you knew it was over the first time he hit you.
“Only you can decide if it’s too soon and if you’re ready,” she smiles kindly, “but don’t hold yourself back. You deserve to be happy.”
You take a deep breath.
“I like you too.”
•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•
A/N: so…we find out a little bit more about Bradley in this chapter and the story behind what happened when he and Reese shared a grief-induced kiss. Also drunk Shae spilling all her secrets is 💯 me lol.
It took a few months but they finally kissed…and more 😏 pretty sure I could have an orgasm just from Bradley talking like that, even if it was just to help with a leg cramp haha.
As always, any interaction is appreciated but I LOVE hearing what you think in the comments/reblogs! Seriously, feedback helps me more than anything.
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gingiesworld · 1 year ago
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Hello, My Love
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Wanda Maximoff x GN! Reader
Warnings: Angst. Fluff.
Word Count: 5.5k
AN: This is the second part to Goodbye, My Love. I hope you guys enjoyed this and please let me know what you thought of it. <3
Taglist : @natashamaximoff-69 @canvascoloredin @wizardofstories @louxbloom @wandanats-goodgirl @the-ox-fan20 @ladyqueenxoxo @aemilia19 @wandaromamoff69 @mfd-101 @dorabledewdroop @marvelogic @dopeyouth @karsonromanoff @bimad @alexawynters @natleft (if you want to be added to my taglist, please DM me or comment)
18+ MINORS DNI
Five years ago, the riot that had occurred within the prison was broadcasted over every news station. Reports of multiple inmates and Prison Guards were dead, there were more reported injuries. Wanda called Pepper, hoping to hear that she would never get the bad news, which she never did receive the bad news.
Five years, she carried on writing to them, telling them everything that had happened during her week, even telling them about the sucky dates that Nat kept setting her on. She even told them about her last interaction with Jarvis, that was only a few months ago.
“Wanda?” He smirked as they bumped into each other, Wanda tensed up at the sound of his voice. “How is Y/N? I’ve been meaning to visit them, congratulate them on making it to the NFL.” But then he chuckled. “But they never had the chance did they? Because they took the fall for you.”
“Please leave me alone.” Wanda whispered as he just laughed.
“Not so brave without a gun are we.” He sneered as she looked away from him. “It should be you in their place, you should be the one serving time for almost killing me.” Wanda just shook her head and walked away from him, the sound of his laugh remained in her mind for weeks after that.
But what she didn’t know was Y/N was now getting out on good behavior. They walked through the gates, seeing Nat leaning against her car, a smile on her face as she saw her oldest friend.
“Hey.” They gave her a small smile as she opened her arms for them.
“Hi.” She embraced them tightly, afraid to let go with the fear that they might disappear. “Let’s get you home.” They walked to the passenger side and got in, watching the roads as they passed by.
“How’s everyone been?” They asked her.
“Well, Morgan is now a troublesome teen. She missed you so much, the same as your mom.” She told them. “Oddly enough, your dad has tried to help get your release finalised sooner.” She noticed their shocked expression. “I know, I almost died too.”
“What about Wanda?” They asked her as she nodded, a tight lipped smile on her face. “She’s been sending me letters ever since I stopped her or anyone visiting me.”
“I know.” Nat told them. “She told me, she also told me you never replied to any of them.”
“I have written her letters.” Y/N told her. “I have them all here, but I just couldn’t send them to her.”
“Why?” Nat questioned as they looked out of the window.
“I wanted her to be able to move on, even if it meant that I was the one to let her go.” They admitted. “She knows how much I love her and I wanted her to live her life without ever thinking of me again.”
“It didn’t work though.” Nat started as Y/N nodded with a light chuckle.
“It didn’t, she told me about all of the dates you set her up on.” They spoke as they watched the road ahead. “She told me how she couldn’t bring herself to do anything more than one date with any of them.”
“Because she is in love with you.” Nat told them. “She just realised it too late, and you were too much of a coward to tell her.”
“I know.” They nodded. “I just couldn’t deal with losing her if she never felt the same way.”
“I know.” She nodded as they soon reached New York. Their heart started to beat rapidly as they realised that they don’t look the same as they did a decade ago, they have scars and look worn out compared to how they used to look.
“What if no one likes me now?” Y/N questioned as Nat chuckled.
“Believe me, everyone has missed you so much Y/N.” She told them. “Well, except Jarvis.”
“Please tell me he has finally moved away.” They groaned as Nat shook her head no.
“I’m afraid not.” She told them as she pulled into the Stark Mansion driveway.
“Fuck.” They muttered as they looked up at the place they called their home. “It looks even more intimidating now.”
“Yeah.” Nat laughed as she got out, followed by Y/N as they grabbed their bags, following Nat up the stairs to the door.
“Nat?” Pepper questioned as she answered the door.
“Mom?” Y/N smiled as they looked over Nat’s shoulder.
“Y/N?” She gasped as Nat moved to the side, taking Y/N’s bags and heading inside. “You’re home?”
“I’m home.” They told her, a smile on their face as she cupped their face, getting a proper look at them.
“You look rugged.” She told them.
“Yeah, I need to cut my hair.” They admitted as she shook her head
“I think you suit it.” She told them. “Come on, Morgan will be excited to see you.” She led them inside, listening as Morgan and Yelena were talking about their homework. “Morgan, look who’s here.” She told her as she let go of Y/N’s hand, Morgan’s eyes instantly landing on theirs.
“Y/N?” She squealed as she jumped up into their arms, Y/N chuckled as they caught her.
“Oh god.” Y/N hugged her close before letting her go. “You’ve grown so much.”
“Well, it has been 10 years now.” She reminded them as their heart broke a little.
“I missed you little one.” They told her softly as she hugged them tighter than before.
“Promise you won’t leave me again.” She whispered shakily.
“I’m not going anywhere.” They told her honestly. “I promise.”
“Come eat.” Pepper told them as Morgan led them into the dining room, Morgan catching Y/N up on everything they missed.
“You should have seen dad’s face when he found out that I wanted to be a writer.” Morgan told them with a smirk. “I thought he was going to pop a vein or something.”
“Well, he wasn’t happy that you were straying away from the family business.” Pepper stated.
“Just like he wasn’t happy with me when I strayed away from his dreams.” Y/N remarked as Pepper sighed, both Morgan and Nat remained silent. “Where is dad and Jarvis? I would have thought they could have been here, you know it has been 10 years after all.”
“Y/N, you know why your father isn’t here, same with Jarvis.” Pepper warned them.
“Yeah, they’re not happy because Wanda returned the ring when he was in the coma.” Morgan smirked as Nat and Y/N chuckled lightly.
“Your father and brother were devastated!” Pepper raised her voice. “Wanda would have been a fine addition to this family.”
“No.” Y/N shook their head. “She was too good for him.” Pepper went to interrupt but Y/N stopped her. “You know it too mom, Jarvis isn’t a nice guy, he never has been.”
“Y/N, he has changed.” She tried as Y/N snorted.
“And hell has frozen over.” Y/N remarked as Pepper shook her head in disapproval.
“Are you going to tell Wanda your back?” Nat questioned as Y/N tensed up.
“I don’t know.” They answered. “I have her letters there in my bag, but I don’t think she will want to see me.”
“She will.” Morgan told them. “She has been coming around to see how you are, if there has been any news.”
“She hasn’t moved on.” Nat told them. “I’ve tried to get her to go on dates and meet someone, just so she has someone and she doesn’t get past the first date.”
Y/N listened to them as they informed them of how Wanda has spent the last decade, how she has kept hope that she would see Y/N again, be with Y/N and have a future with them.
“Can you take me to Wanda’s?” Y/N asked Nat who only nodded with a smile.
“Let’s go then.” She told them, they kissed both Morgan and Pepper on the head before grabbing the bag with the letters for Wanda, and following Nat out to her car.
“How do you think she’ll react?” They asked her nervously.
“Well, I don’t really know.” Nat answered them. “She was furious that you did what you did for her. There was a brief moment she hated you but we all know she can’t hate you.” She sighed as she pulled up outside of Wanda’s building. “To be honest, she may be mad, she may be happy. It could go either way really.”
“That helps Natalia, really.” They spoke sarcastically as the two got out of the car. They followed her up the stairs to Wanda’s floor, wanting to take as much time as they could before seeing the woman they had failed to forget during their time in prison.
“Nat, what are you doing here?” Wanda asked as she answered the door to her, Y/N leaned on the wall as they heard her voice for the first time in years. Their heart beating rapidly in their chest as their nerves had gotten worse.
“Someone wanted to see you.” Nat told her. “They haven’t really stopped thinking about you or asking about you all day and it is kind of annoying.”
“You should have come later. I have company.” She told her with a raised brow.
“Is it Stu?” She asked with a raised brow.
“Yeah, he is just in the shower.” Y/N dropped the bag of letters on the floor as Nat noticed their expression falter before they started towards the exit.
“Well, I will want to hear all about it, but these are for you.” Nat handed her the bag of letters before she hurried after Y/N, she reached them as they leaned against the car waiting for her.
“You told me she wasn’t seeing anyone.” They told her sadly as Nat sighed.
“I thought she wasn’t, I set them up a couple of weeks ago and I never thought she would actually see him again because she never does.” Nat told them as they stepped away from the car.
“I’m going to walk home.” They told her as they stepped away. “I need to be alone right now.”
“Y/N, you’ve just got out, let’s celebrate.” Nat tried as they shook their head.
“Maybe it would have been better if I never survived the riot five years ago.” They told her.
“No.” She scolded them. “You do not get to say that! We have been friends forever and I hated the last decade! I hated it because my friend wasn’t here with me.” She took their hand. “Let’s go and see Steve and Bucky, there is a lot you have missed.” She led them to the car before starting their journey.
“What are those?” Stu asked as Wanda emptied the bag of letters on the table, organising them by date.
“Letters from Y/N.” She whispered as he picked one up.
“Why didn’t they ever send them?” He asked as she shrugged, standing up and getting herself a glass of wine.
“I don’t know.” She answered him, her eyes burning with years of unshed tears and emotions. “I think you should leave.” She told him as he laughed.
“Come on, Wanda, you can’t be serious.” He asked her. “We have been going out for a few weeks now, I asked you to be mine last night before we fucked.”
“Wow, real classy Stu.” She spat at him before she took a deep breath. “Maybe we need to take a step back.”
“No! That’s absurd!” He yelled as Wanda shook her head.
“No, what’s absurd is me thinking I could ever love someone else the way I love them.” She told him. “Please just leave and lose my number.” She told him as she held the door open for him, watching as he grabbed his things before approaching her.
“You’re going to regret this.” He told her as he stood before her.
“The only thing I regret is even giving us a chance.” She told him before slamming the door in his face, taking a deep breath as she locked the door and made her way back over to the letters.
She noticed from the first one, they had written to her since she had sent in her first letter to them. A small smile played on her lips at the idea of Y/N even having some hope for them.
Dear Wanda,
I know that this isn’t exactly a peak milestone in our friendship, but I think it should count. I got your letter and I am sorry that this happened to us. I just couldn’t picture you in here suffering for something that might have saved your life.
You’re my best friend, my biggest supporter, the ying to my yang.
Love Y/N/N
She smiled as she read their small letter, remembering how they could barely stand writing and always opted to call instead. But as she read the letters, she smiled at how much longer they had gotten.
Dear Wanda,
I know you probably hate me by now, I pushed you away when you needed me, but truthfully, you never really did need me. Seeing how you’ve written about your life this past couple of years has really made me proud. I am proud of the woman you have become Wanda and whoever is lucky enough to call you theirs should know it.
I know in another lifetime, maybe it did work out for us, maybe we would have worked out right now if I had the balls to tell you how I felt before college. Before you even thought of being with my brother. We could have had everything, maybe if I am lucky enough and you’re still single when I get out of here, we can have everything. I know that’s a pipe dream that’s never going to happen.
Love Y/N/N
Dear Wanda,
It’s been five years, and these five years have been the loneliest I have ever been. Yeah, I have a cellmate, Brock, he is a dick but he has my back. We have to look out for each other here or we could end up dead, believe me, there are some people here who hate my dad and they do tend to take it out on me because of my name and relationship with him, but it’s nothing I can’t handle.
There hasn’t been a day where I don’t think about you, Wanda. Everyday I wake up and wonder what you might be doing today, are you happy and healthy? Have you found that person that makes you smile as soon as you open your eyes? But on some selfish level, I wish that you are as alone as me, I wish that maybe you’re waiting for me to get out of here, but that is all just wonders.
Love Y/N/N
Wanda couldn’t bring herself to read the next letter, given there is a two month pause in between them. Not wanting to read the extent of the injuries they suffered during that riot, the nightmares that occured after or the horror they witnessed.
“It’s so good to have you back!” Bucky cheered as he pulled Y/N into a tight embrace.
“Have you been to see Wanda? I’m sure she will be so thrilled.” Steve started as he pulled them into his embrace.
“We did.” Y/N told them with a small smile. “She had company.”
“She never saw Y/N, they just dropped the letters they wrote to her and left.” Nat told the couple.
“Was it Stu?” Steve questioned as Nat nodded.
“I don’t like him.” Bucky blurted out, making everyone laugh. “What? He is a pompous dick.”
“I can agree with that.” Nat nodded as Y/N looked out of the window.
“Y/N, I have something to show you.” Steve said as he led Y/N away from the other two, closing the door to his office before turning to them. “Talk to me.”
“About what?” They asked him.
“About how you feel.” He spoke softly. “I’ll be here to listen, a shoulder to lean on because I can see that you’re trying your hardest to put on a brave face.”
“I am anxious.” They started as they picked up a picture of Steve and Bucky on their wedding day, a smile on their face as they admired the picture. “I have spent the last decade a nervous wreck, barely a few hours of sleep each night, the threats that I received because of the amount of people who knew who I really was, thinking that The Great Tony Stark will pay out millions to ensure his child’s safety.” Steve just listened as they rambled on. “And tonight, I don’t know how I’m going to deal with the nightmares. The last five years have been ok because I have been in a cell on my own, but I am home and I don’t want anyone to see me like that.”
“I don’t know how bad your nightmares are, but you have a lot of support here, your sister, mom and you have all of us. All we want is to help you through this because you have suffered a great deal while you have been inside.” He told them. “You won’t be alone ok.” He pulled them in for another hug before they pulled away quickly.
“I missed your wedding!!” They yelled as Steve nodded with a laugh. “I can’t believe I missed everything!!”
“It’s ok.” He smiled at them before resting his hand on the door handle. “Talk to Wanda, you never know what will happen tomorrow. You of all people should know that.”
Wanda stood at the step of the Stark Residence, knocking frantically, after reading the letter they wrote after the riot, she wanted to know why no one told her of their injuries.
“Wanda?” Morgan questioned as Wanda gave her a smile.
“Hi, is your mom here?” She asked the teen politely.
“Yeah, come in.” She let the now brunette inside, leading her to the living room where Pepper sat reading the paper.
“Wanda, what are you doing here?” Pepper questioned. “I would have thought you would be out with everyone celebrating.”
“Why would I be celebrating?” She questioned as Pepper raised a brow.
“Y/N’s home.” Was all she said before the door opened again, Wanda turned in time to see Y/N enter the living room. Her eyes stung with tears waiting to be shed as Y/N’s eyes widened, their heart beating rapidly in their chest as Pepper cleared her throat. “I think you two should talk.” She got up and grabbed Morgan’s wrist. “We are going out for dinner.” With that, Wanda was left in the house alone with Y/N.
“Hello, my love.” They gave her a nervous smile. “Do you want a drink?” They asked her as she just shook her head, her eyes never leaving their form. “Well, I need one.” She followed them into the kitchen, watching as they grabbed the whiskey and poured themselves a glass.
“You look different.” Wanda told them as they chuckled.
“Well, it has been 10 years.” They chuckled as they turned to face her.
“Don’t do that.” She told them firmly. “Don’t make it seem like this is all on me. I wanted to wait for you, fight for you, for us, because you were the one who pushed me away.”
“Because I wanted you to live your life Wanda! You deserve to find your happiness and not be constantly haunted by the thought of us!” They yelled as she chuckled dryly.
“Is that why you never sent me any of those letters? You just kept them in a bag thinking I would never read them.” She spat as she stepped closer to them.
“I wanted you to move forward Wanda. I wanted you to live your life and not wait on me.” They told her softly.
“I was willing to wait for you because I loved you!” She poked their chest. “I really loved you.” With that she left the house, leaving a sad Y/N behind.
“She just left?” Morgan asked as she sat beside Y/N on the sofa.
“Yep.” They nodded as Morgan chuckled lightly.
“I would have thought she would have jumped your bones after not seeing you for years.” She told them as they nudged her arm.
“Hey! Don’t talk like that.” They scolded her as she gave them a serious look.
“I’m not 6 anymore Y/N.” She told them. “I’m 16 now, but you wouldn’t know that, I haven’t had a happy birthday off of you in 10 years.” With that she stormed up to her room as Pepper walked in.
“Just give her time.” She told them. “She missed you so much when you were arrested, she cried every night for you.”
“I’m sorry mom.” They whispered as they looked at Pepper who only smiled.
“You have nothing to apologise for.” She told them. “I know the truth of what really happened. Nat told me, and then Wanda did.” Y/N sat and listened to her as she spoke. “I know what your brother is capable of, I know what he did to Wanda too and why she did it.” She turned to face them as she spoke. “I also understand why you did what you did, although I was furious with you, because you threw away your career for someone.”
“It wasn’t just someone.” Y/N remarked as Pepper smiled at them.
“I know that, I remembered seeing how you looked at her, how much you hated every guy she ever dated, how they were never good enough for her.” She told them. “I know you more than anyone, but you need to get your feelings in order because that girl has waited for you for 10 years.”
“She’s with someone.” Y/N told her sadly. “She told Nat and the guys.”
“Fight for her.” She told them. “Don’t give up on the one thing that gave you hope!” She pulled them up to their feet. “Go, now!” She handed them their keys, a smile appearing on their face. “I kept it looked after all these years, I may have neglected my own car just to keep yours running.”
“Thank you mom.” They whispered as they hugged her, soon racing their way to Wanda’s apartment, remembering the address and the number. Racing up the stairs, soon standing outside her door. Knocking frantically and waiting impatiently for her to answer it.
“What are you doing here?” She asked them as they gave her a small smile.
“The way we left it the other day, it shouldn’t have been left like that.” They rambled as she fought the smile that wanted to appear. “We both should be happy to see each other, not argue over something so small.”
“Would you like to come inside?” Wanda asked them. “I have a fresh pot of coffee on.”
“I would like that.” They smiled as she stepped aside, allowing them inside. They followed her through to her kitchen, admiring the decor and the pictures she had on the wall. “I got your letters.” They told her. “They uh got me through a lot of tough times.”
“Why didn’t you ever send your letters?” She asked them as they sighed, thanking her for the cup.
“I thought that maybe you would forget about me. Move on with your life without me.” They told her honestly. “I guess, I just thought that maybe you would be married to a great guy with a family of your own.”
“I couldn’t.” Wanda whispered as she looked in their eyes. “I tried to move on, I did but my heart belonged to you.” She exhaled sharply before continuing. “It still does.”
“Wanda.” They whispered as they soon pulled her in for a tight hug, Wanda sighed as she felt their strong arms around her middle. The two remained in this position for a long moment, neither wanting it to end just yet.
“Sit with me.” Wanda said as she soon dragged them to sit on the sofa, her head leaning on her hand as she gazed at them. “You have some scars.” She lightly touched their face as she looked into their eyes.
“Well, the riot wasn’t the only violence I had experienced.” They told her honestly. “I had a few run-ins with some of the inmates, and they weren’t exactly nice.”
“I think you look hot.” She whispered as they soon removed her hand from her.
“You’re in a relationship.” They told her, watching as she shook her head no.
“I ended it last week, the day Nat gave me your letters.” She told them honestly. “I knew there was no sense in moving on because I should be with you, Y/N.”
“You can’t say that and expect me not to kiss you.” They told her barely above a whisper, caressing her face as she smiled at them.
“What if I want you to kiss me?” She replied, biting her lip as she felt their hot breath fanning over her face. Y/N wasted no time in pressing their lips onto hers, kissing her roughly before she straddled their lap, soon spending the night exploring each other’s bodies.
Y/N listened as there was constant yells and banging from outside the cell, sharing a look with Brock who got his own homemade shiv from under his pillow. Watching as he disappeared onto the walkway, yelling profanities as he swung his weapon around.
Y/N listened to the pained yellings of injured inmates, the triumphant shouts of others as they stepped out of their cell, looking over the railings to see the guards also fighting for their lives. It wasn’t until they looked to their left, seeing someone charge at them, sending them over the edge and onto the lower level. Groaning as they turned over just in time to stop another stabbing them.
“Y/N!” They heard Brock call out to them, struggling against two fellow inmates. “Y/N!”
“Y/N.” They soon jolted awake and fell out of the bed, a worried Wanda looked over the edge. “Are you ok?” She asked them as they got up, climbing back in the bed and nodding.
“Yeah, it was just a nightmare.” They told her.
“Do you want to talk about it?” She asked them as she rested her head on their chest.
“I’m fine.” They told her. “Let’s get some sleep.”
“Is it about the riot?” She asked them as they took a deep breath. “I saw your other scars, I just want you to know that you can talk to me.” She told them softly. “I am not going anywhere.”
“It’s just, there was someone who I could have saved.” They told her. “My cellmate, Brock, he always had my back. Always stuck by me, even though he had every possibility to kill me to get in good with others who wanted me dead.” Wanda watched as they spoke, her fingers tracing mindless patterns on their skin. “He died, trying to help me. I wasn’t supposed to survive that riot, I was supposed to bleed out beside him but the guards, they shut it down.” Wanda took their hand in hers. “I was lucky, this scar here.” They pointed to the scar on their chest. “This was my end.”
“I’m so sorry.” Wanda whispered as they shook their head. “It should have been me who went to prison, not you.”
“I would make the same choice every time.” They told her softly. “I would do anything for you Wanda. I always will.” She cupped their cheek as she moved to sit up, the moonlight cascading over her naked form as she looked deep into their eyes. Noses brushing together as she leaned in to kiss them lovingly, the bodies pressed together as Y/N wrapped their arms around her, making her feel safe and complete for the first time in her life. Only they know what their future holds for the two.
Five Years Later
Y/N was looking around for their belt and work boots frantically, nervous about this job as it is a big job for them.
“Wanda! Have you seen my?” Their words were lost in their throat as they saw a four year old Tommy waddling around in their boots and their belt hanging from his waist. “What do we have here little fella.” They smiled as they picked the toddling child up into their arms.
“I’m so sorry, I tried to keep him away from your things.” Wanda ran in frantically as Y/N only smiled at her.
“It’s ok.” They smiled as they kissed the side of Tommy’s head. “I am my own boss after all.” They pressed a tender kiss to her lips.
“I made your lunch.” She told them as she packed their bag with sandwiches and a flask of coffee as they finished getting themselves ready.
“Thank you.” They smiled as they finally stood up, ready for work. “My mom said she will have the twins tonight and maybe we can have a little date night.”
“I already promised Nat I would go out.” Wanda spoke seriously as Y/N’s smile faltered. “I can cancel if you want me to.”
“No, you should go and let your hair down.” They told her softly. “At least don’t drink too much and call me when you want to be picked up.”
“I will.” She kissed them once more before Billy came running into their arms, hugging them tightly before the three of them waved Y/N off as they drove their truck to the site, meeting Bucky already there and ready for work.
“So how is the wife and kids?” Bucky asked them with a smile.
“They are great, although Tommy seems to have taken a liking to my boots.” They told him honestly as they finished their last job for the day. “My mom is having the twins tonight and Wanda is going out with Nat.”
“So, you have the house to yourself.” He smirked as Y/N chuckled.
“I guess I can do some of the jobs that need doing and I haven’t gotten around to.” They shrugged as Bucky nodded.
“Or you can just sit back and relax.” He told them. “You’re not in prison now Y/N, besides, you served your sentence.”
“Not really though.” They shrugged as Bucky shook his head, the two standing up getting ready to leave. “I only finished half of my sentence.”
“But you got out.” Bucky told them. “You’re free to live your life, watch your family grow. Don’t dwell on the past.”
“I’m not.” They defended as Bucky followed them to the truck.
“You are.” He told them seriously. “Look, I don’t know half of what happened inside but I do know that you have the life you have always dreamed of with Wanda and the twins. Yeah, you may not have your dream job but that’s ok. You just have to make the most of the life you have now.”
Y/N took in his words before the two went their separate ways, he was right because they have always dreamed of living this life together with Wanda. Having a family with her and they have it all.
“I thought you were going out?” Y/N asked as they saw Wanda coming out from the kitchen, a dish of their favorite meal in her hands.
“I can go out with Nat anytime, but I want to spend the night with you.” She told them. “I cooked your favorite.” She told them as they smiled at her.
“Thank you.” They told her as they approached her, their hands wrapping around her waist. “For waiting for me and making me the happiest person alive.”
“I love you Y/N.” She told them sincerely as she looked in their eyes. “I will always love you until my dying days, and even in the afterlife, I will love you.” They captured her lips in a gentle kiss before she pushed them away, a teasing smirk on her face. “Go and shower, I’ll keep the dinner warm.”
“I love you Wanda Maximoff.” They told her. “You have always been the light of my life.” She blushed as they ascended the stairs to their shared bedroom, the walls were lined with pictures, from the memories they had made together, some from before they left for college, and more from when they had come back into her life. The moments they had shared together which made their hearts glow as one, even brighter the moment they brought the twins into the world, making their family complete.
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pretty-blkgirl · 1 month ago
Text
Soul’s Desire [Ch. 18]
-Masterlist-
~~~~|~~~~
Six hours. Your mom kept you on the phone for six whole hours. You promised to call her when you left practice, so you did. It was 10 PM for you, and maybe 8 AM for her, she answered and immediately asked why you waited so long to get back to her.
After apologizing for a little bit, she started to tell you about her birthday plans. You listened as you rode home, got in the house, and waltzed into your room. She started accusing you of not loving her when you tried to hang up quickly to take a shower, so you put the phone on speaker and took it in the bathroom.
At the two-hour mark, you made the mistake of dozing off. She was talking about her new boyfriend, again. You admittedly zoned out and then fell asleep, then woke up to her cursing you out.
At the four-hour mark, you told her you only had a few hours before you had to get up to go to work. She told you your career wasn’t as important as her.
At the six-hour mark, she told you that she was tired and needed a nap, you had three hours before you had to get up.
So you spent the entire day running off of 3 hours of sleep. You put on a tired smile for your interviews, tried to be funny for YouTube content, and yawned more times than appropriate in a meeting. The day ended at 9 PM, and you were off the next day, so you wanted to rush home.
You kept your phone off because you knew your mom would call you, and you refused to let her keep you up all night again.
On your way to the elevator, you heard a door open. Assuming it was JYP staff, you turned to the person and bowed to be polite. To your absolute horror, Bang Chan stood in front of you.
You were avoiding the guys, and you’re sure they knew that. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to be around them, it was the fact that you had been hearing about how useless and stupid you were a lot more than usual.
You were used to your mother’s bullying, but ever since you physically removed yourself from her, she upped her antics. She was your only family, as she was an orphan and you never knew your father.
You held onto her because you wanted her approval, you wanted her to love you correctly, and you knew that.
The problem with trying to love your mother, however, was her doing her best to make sure you felt no one could love you.
“Hey Chris” You sigh, an exhausted smile playing on your lips.
“Hey y/nnie. Haven’t seen you in a while”
Guilt filled your chest, and you know he felt it because you didn’t even bother to suppress the bond.
“I’m sorry” Is all you say. What else can you do? You avoided them, your soulmates. You probably made them feel like shit, probably made them think you didn’t care enough. They probably hated you. You were rude, selfish, and everything else your mom said.
“Don’t apologize. You’ve been busy, yeah? The boys and I listened to your group’s album, it was so good”
Your smile grew a little, symbol aside, you admired Stray Kids. They were one of the best, and for Chan of all people to compliment your music, made you feel a little better.
“Thank you, we worked hard”
“I can tell. I’m excited for what else you guys are gonna do”
His cute dimples were poking out his cheeks. You hated how much you adored him. You didn’t even know him that well, and he didn’t know you. So why are your knees going a little weak whenever he stares into your eyes? Why is he looking at you like he cares? Like he wants to know what’s been going on?
“Thank you, see you around”
You try to leave, but he calls you back. You knew he was going to do that, and you knew you were gonna stop in your tracks and turn back around to face him.
“I’m sorry if I’m overstepping,” He says, “But is everything okay? I know you’re probably stressed out because of the debut and everything but you look a little…off?”
You don’t say anything, just get a weird feeling in your chest.
“You also haven’t been talking to us and that's okay! We understand. We’re completely fine with giving you space and, the guys and I talked and we said we weren’t gonna try to confront you or anything but I just can’t let you walk out of here without making sure you’re alright. So, are you okay?”
Again, no words. Your members, your manager, and even some staff had been asking you that same question every single day. You had no problem looking them in the eyes and saying yes. But, for whatever reason, you can’t lie to Chan.
It could be because you’re not doing well, or maybe it’s because you know he can feel your sadness building up, but you choose not to lie.
“No” You shrug. Tears seem to immediately start falling. Chan wastes no time grabbing your arm and gently leading you to his studio.
You started to sob once the door closed. Chan jumped into action quickly, hugging you and keeping you from falling to the floor.
He sat you down on the couch, his arms still wrapped around you, rocking side to side as you cried into his chest.
Not once did he ask the specifics of what happened, because he knew you didn’t want to talk about it.
Thirty minutes of crying later, you were sniffling into his damp shirt.
“I messed up your shirt,” you say loud enough for him to hear
“Fuck this shirt,” he says back, making you laugh for the first time in a while
He wouldn’t let you apologize for crying, even though you kept trying to.
“Y/n don’t you ever apologize for being vulnerable in front of me. I’m always gonna be here for you, I want you to know that”
You didn’t wanna go home that night, you just felt like you’d somehow end up calling your mom and crying more.
So, you asked Chan if you could crash at his place, and you barely got the sentence out before he agreed.
You texted your members your whereabouts, and after several childish jokes, they wished you goodnight.
Chan texted I.N. (who seemed both confused and thrilled you were spending the night).
The car ride to his complex was short, and the elevator ride to his door was even shorter. I.N. greeted you both at the door, and you don’t know why, but you asked if you could hug him, and he answered by pulling you into his embrace.
Chan wouldn’t let you sleep on the couch, so you agreed to sleep in his room while he slept in I.N.’s room.
I.N. gave you an old pair of shorts and a shirt he had for you to sleep in. You could tell he liked the sight of you in his clothes by the blush creeping up his neck when you walked out of the bathroom.
You asked Chan if they had any schedules the next day. They did but they were early, so he told you that you were more than welcome to stay at their place until you were ready to go home.
Before you left them to go to bed, you suggested a nice dinner with the rest of the members tomorrow.
You were gonna talk to them about your absence because you felt like you owed them that.
~~~|~~~
Taglist: @chuuyaobsessed @h0rnyp0t @prttyxbby @yukichan67 @hanniemylovelyquokka @xxeiraxx @loveforlee444 @whatdoyouwanttocallmefor @cunninglibrarian @holly-here @galaxy4489 @hyunmikim @yougottobekittenme
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byunpum · 2 years ago
Text
Experiment 56 [part 3]
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Neteyam x Human reader ( like a mix of human and Navi )
and sullyFAM x human reader, spider x reader , and quaritch x reader (dont blame me )
Tw: mmm neteyam baby, reader being mutant, neytiri being a sweetheart-mother, jealousy, a little 18+ but a little, all the characters are aged up 20's.
POV: Y/N is surprised that it is an indispensable piece for the human race. Her family will do everything possible to keep her hidden and safe…
Experiment 56 masterlist | Experiment 56 sequel Masterlist
PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4 | PART 5 | PART 6 | PART 7
Note: I got a little carried away with the pov. So the reading is a little long. But I hope you enjoy it, I already have the other parts in my head. I know you're going to love it, thanks again to all of you. From now on I warn you that I am not very expert in this Navi culture, but I did my best. And I'll be using events that happened in the movie, but they won't be exactly the same. And sorry for the spelling. English is not my mother tongue.
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"Ok, we're all awake now" Jake said, "no, loak is left, he went out to do something" kiri said as she braided your hair. "Well, I'll go get him" Jake came out of the hut. Neytiri came over to you and took your hands to see how your wounds are." How are they feeling? How do you feel? better?" said Neytiri as she also checked the bandages on your ankles. "I'm fine, mom." Neytiri looked at you and laughed a little.
You didn't usually call her mama, but when you did her heart would grow with joy. She didn't understand how she had become so fond of you. She thought it was because you had Navi blood, and that was the reason you were closer to her, but no, it was something else. She loved you as her daughter. It was like that time you were in the lab, you were about 5 years old, and you were in Jake's arms while Norm was taking blood samples. Jake looked up something on the computer, and put on a video of him when he was human. y/n stared at the screen, and then looked at Jake, "Did you see who's there? That's me, daddy." y/n looked at Jake "but you're pink and now you're blue" . Neytiri laughed a little, she was admiring the scene. Y/N was the baby she and jake would have had, if jake was still human. She fantasized about that idea. And if y/n was a gift from eywa, she was grateful for it. Because you were such a well-behaved, kind, strong child. Very strong.
"It's ready," kiri said as she continued to fix your hair. "I think the beads neteyam gave you, they look good "you looked at kiri with a withering look." Which beads?" asked neytiri while looking at your hair. "Yes, neteyam gave me some to put in my hair." Neytiri analyzed your expressions, "well… they look good on you." She shifted her gaze and got up to prepare breakfast.
"Kiriiiiiiii why did you say that?" you whispered to kiri while tapping her on the shoulder." Hey, I think it's cute…that coordinating outfits thing" she giggles at you, while still playing with her. You and kiri were so close. You said you were almost twins, since you gave them away on the same day to your parents. And they were the product of strange circumstances.
"Yes, but no one must know. You know… what mom and DAD will think. I don't want to imagine what dad will say, he's going to bury me alive and then you guys for covering up this secret." You look at kiri with worried. "hey…take it easy. Yeah, we grew up together and all. But we all know you and neteyam like each other…the looks and all. Trust me, I think dad knows something. Besides, neteyam was your first kiss." You turn completely around to look at kiri "kiri…we were 10 years old and it wasn't neteyam….it was spider." Kiri couldn't hold in her laughter. "ahhhh I remember now, it was a challenge. But neteyam kissed you later and ran off." You guys kept laughing until jake came in with loak.
"Ok, together everyone" You all settled in a circle and turned your attention to jake. "Family, you know what happened yesterday…the attack there was towards y/n." you lowered your head, you were trying to forget what happened. "Your mother and I talked and thought about going somewhere else." kiri stood up upset." what????" you tried to take kiri's hand." Hey, this is going to get worse… they want y/n. And then they'll go after all of us. This is for the best" jake took neytiri's hand "guys, it's the right thing to do" neytiri affirmed squeezing her partner's hand. Kiri didn't like the idea and left the pot in anger. Behind her were loak and tuk, these two were not upset by the idea, but went to look for their sister.
You were silent "dad?" Jake looked at you "yes, y/n" you took a deep breath "what about spider?" neteyam looked at you, while jake adjusted "honey, he's got…" "he'll stay here and that's it" said neytiri somewhat annoyed. You knew she didn't tolerate spider, but you still loved him so much. "But they're going to look for him. …. They know he knows me, he knows us. He must go with us. They can hurt him" neteyam stood up in discomfort and came up for air. Here you were again, worrying about spider, thought neteyam.
"Y/N, he will be fine. I promise", jake put a hand on your shoulder " no, please daddy…. He has to go with us. Please" jake looked you in the eyes, he knows how important he was to you spider. He knows his children love that monkey-human. "ok, that's fine he will come with us". "What do you say? No." Neytiri is upset. " Any clan we go to, they're going to reject us. And it's going to be his fault" you stood up and looked at neytiri "then they're not going to accept me either, mom look at me… I'm a human, a fucking demon. An experiment. A fucking human, with a navi tail. I'm sure they'll judge me more than the spider himself. We can't just leave him here." Neytiri looks at you with teary eyes, you just called yourself a demon. No, to her you were not a demon. "come here" neytiri hugged you " don't ever say that again… you are my precious girl". You hugged neytiri tighter, the woman looked at her mate and ascended with her head." It's okay, spider will accompany us." Neytiri looked at you, she saw your face light up. "thank you, thank you!!!" You ran off to break the news to kiri and the others.
"This is a disaster, How she knows it's an experiment. Besides, taking that kid…. I don't like Ma jake" neytiri moved closer to jake as he pulled her arms around her. "We'll be fine, I promise."
Kiri was with spider, loak and tuk. They were discussing the idea that jake had said. Kiri couldn't believe it, she loved her home. And leaving meant leaving everyone, leaving spider. Kiri looked up, when she saw you running, she had to laugh a little. You almost fell to the ground, you were funny when you ran. "Guys I have very good news" you go and hug spider. "what's wrong?" spider hugs you back as he puts his hands on your waist "ahhhh I'm so happy" you start jumping up and down, making spider copy your steps. Tuk joins you "what happened?" kiri asks, making you look at her." Spider is going with us, of course…if he wants to" You look at spider, the boy's eyes widened. "Is it serious?" Kiri couldn't believe it. She hugged spider. "Sure…but how?" spider couldn't believe what you were saying." Well…I have my charms" you say as you grimace, "sure, manipulative" said loak, as he pushed you to the side, so he could hug spider." Come here bro, I told you we would all be together" loak pulled you all closer in a big hug. "where's neteyam?" asked tuk. He was right, he was nowhere to be found. Oh no, you knew where he was and how he was. "Hey, why don't you tell norm and the guys everything while I go look for neteyam" Before you left, spider held your hand, looked you in the eye and rubbed his thumb over your hand. Your heart skipped a beat, you must admit that you and spider had a history, before you liked neteyam. Spider was your first crush. Loak and kiri looked into each other's eyes and tuk made a disgusted face. "well, you come or not" kiri said, as she dragged everyone with her.
You got to the soul tree, you knew neteyam was going to be there. And boom…you were right. He was sitting, while his queue was connected to eywa. He was praying. You sat next to him, and waited for him to finish. When he noticed your presence, he opened one eye and then ignored you. He just did that, you said to yourself." If you don't talk to me, I won't leave. And you know it" neteyam moved away from the eywa branches and settled down next to you. "Why do you always worry about him?" you couldn't believe what you just heard." Excuse me… are you talking about spider?" neteyam complained and you saw his face change color. "hey, don't be like that with me. Spider is part of the family. We can't leave him here" you take his hand "I know, but have you ever asked me how I feel? The first thing that popped into your head was to ask if…he can go with us." Wow, neteyam was right. You were always worried about spider, ever since you were kids. That was the reason why at 12 years old you had a crush on him, but when you confessed spider said you were "weird and ugly". Which caused neteyam to fight with him, loak to tell his mom and neytiri to try to drown him in the nearest river. Thank goodness Jake, everything was under control. After that, you became disillusioned. It wasn't until, at the age of 19, neteyam confessed that he loved you.
"sorry, yes. forgive me for not asking for you" neteyam settled in front of you, and took your face in his hands. "don't apologize to me, you know I don't like it when you do that." You lifted your heels and gave him a kiss. His lips were soft and warm. Neteyam slid his hands down to your waist, to pull you up onto his lap. Your hands tangled in his hair, as the kiss grew hotter. The kisses were messy, as neteyam kissed his way down your jaw to your neck. A gasp came out of your mouth, as neteyam pulled you closer to his body. Shit, you never went this far before. " neyet…" you sighed when you noticed how needy he was " that's not…mmm" you looked down at his crotch. "I'm sorry, I can't contr…" you interrupted him kissing him again. You two were so wrapped up in your make up section. That you didn't hear loak.
"ahhhhhhhhhh YUCK, NO NO NO NO. Ahhhhhhh" Loak yelled, you and neteyam separated quickly, trying to fix yourselves up a little. "you idiot, you need to learn how to call people" neteyam, turned his back to his brother, while trying to hide his recent erection. "hey, I'm not the one running around fucking in a PUBLIC area. You heard Public" Loak was yelling at his brother, until you hit him. "Shut up already, and don't you dare say anything." You threatened him, "I already knew you two were together, I'm not stupid. Plus, kiri, she's not that good at keeping secrets." You looked at him in shook, oh no. Why kiri had to open her mouth. "what do you want? what are you looking for us for?" neteyam asks, "dad, he says to pack up everything, we have to leave before sunset." Neteyam takes your hand, as you all start walking towards the shelter.
"You and I need to talk miss… I'm your best friend!!!! Why am I the last one to find out that you and neteyam are together. You know you're hurting me." I said loak, while still walking. "don't ignore me!!!!!" you and loak continue your discussion all the way to the shelter. Neteyam just ignores them.
AREA 12, northeast of pandora:
Quaritch sat staring at a fixed point in the lunchroom area, while his teammates laughed and talked about god knows what. In his head there was only one thing… you. How could such a beautiful woman, be the mix of a species that, to his taste, was unpleasant. Well not unpleasant, because now his body was the same. But he didn't find it attractive. "Hey…you're still thinking about that girl, aren't you?" said Lyle as he tapped his arm. "I'm just thinking how she could have gotten away from us" Quaritch shifted his gaze." Yeah, yeah…" Lyle giggled a little. "And did you notice that human boy?" commented Lyle, he looks like your son….miles" Lyle looked at Quaritch waiting for an answer." Yes, he does" There was a short silence until Lyle spoke, "do you think he's that girl's mate? He looked a little worried when John tried to touch her." Quaritch complained "that idiot…he doesn't know how to keep his fucking dick tucked away…. But I don't think boy is the mate. I think it's the blue monkey." Quaritch looked at each other as they analyzed the situation." Lucky guy…she's very pretty." Lyle said "hey…watch out." "I knew it…I knew it!!!!" Lyle got up from the chair and walked towards the exit as he teased Quaritch. "Knew what???" he yelled back…what did Lyle know.
After the saying goodbye to the clan and jake passing his toruk makto position. You all went to the area where the ikran were, all the family belongings were packed. Neytiri was checking that everyone was ready, putting on some kind of tunic, for the cold and wind. When it was almost spider's turn, she handed you the tunic "go and put this on him." Said neytiri as she looked at the poor boy out of the corner of her eye. You approached spider," look, this will keep you warm and safe" you place the tunic over his head, neteyam was next to loak talking about something until he saw the scene in front of him, "watch out… he might take your girlfriend away" said loak, causing neteyam to punch him in the stomach.
"hey, you two stop!!!! family are we ready? let's go!!!" announced jake, already getting into his ikran. Neteyam walked towards you, and took your hand walking towards his ikran. You had to go with someone, because even though you can use your queue, the ikran was too big a beast for you, so you had to share it with Neteyam. Spider noticed neteyam's look and lowered his head and walked over to kiri. "I feel that neteyam wants to murder me," says spider as he settles in behind kiri in her ikran, "don't mind him, he must be upset. After all… this is a big change for everyone" kiri tries to comfort spider. Everyone left, you sat right in front of neteyam, your back was against his chest. And he already had a hand on your waist. "hey…. Hands to the front" chuckled jake to neteyam as he noticed the position you two were in. You heard tuk giggling next to you, when you turned to look, you noticed neytiri was watching you too. Damn…this was going to be a long ride.
p.s:What do you think? Did you like it… Between today or tomorrow I will be uploading the fourth part. And remember the tag list is open. Just let me know. Kisses! <3
Neytiri babies tag: @st4rrry @valeriinee @inutheangel @gielrmn @sloppierjewel @purple7theparty @itscheybaby @ssc7514 @namorslit @ducks118 @tpwkstiles @elli-aesthetics @nao-cchi @uselessbutinteresting @msjae @austynparksandpizza @gamorxa @andyyy4444 @itssomeonereading @meivap @barbii04 @mm-nope @dorck26 @nessrin @purple7theparty @ssc7514 @sloppierjewel @yeosxxx @legendleopard100 @pandoragalora @jayzes-blog @ducks118 @laylasbunbunny @kyriekurokami @heesoftiefreak @teamanime
If there is any problem with the tags, let me know. Soon I will make a post with all the parts.
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