#I almost snapchatted this but thought better

[friendoffrogss]

Me every morning struggling through breakfast: Camilla Hect said this was sexy, I must eat this poptart

[letstrip13]

💐 - stood up

summary: when you get stood up on your first date, you call your best friend to come pick you up. but instead of taking you home, he has a better plan.

warnings: none, just fluff!

word count: 1,571

author's note: reupload!! also new christmas acc theme!!

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you bring your phone up to your ear, listening to it ring and waiting for him to pick up. you pace around a little in the parking lot of a small italian restaurant. the cold breeze makes you shiver in your dress and heels, and you regret even wanting to go on this date. you took the time applying your makeup and styling your hair to perfection.

but the date never happened. you got stood up. you waited around for almost twenty minutes before you got the text from your date. all it said was, “sorry, can't make it. something came up.” but you knew nothing came up. just a few minutes ago, he posted on his snapchat story. he was with another girl. he not only stood you up, but he stood you up for someone else.

one ring, two rings, three rings. finally, you hear chris’ voice on the other end. “hello?” he says in a confused tone. “i thought you were on your date.”

“not anymore,” you tell him, holding back tears. “can you come get me?” “yeah, of course. i'm on my way.” he hangs up and you send him your location.

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chris’ pov: i grab my keys and wallet before rushing out of the house, ignoring my brothers calling after me, asking why i’m leaving in such a hurry. you’re the only thing on my mind right now. it sounded like you were fighting tears. you’re my best friend and i want to do everything in my power to make you happy.

i drive to the location you sent me as fast as i can and i pull into the deserted parking lot. the only one there is you, sitting on the curb in your dress and heels, looking so sad yet so beautiful at the same time. i park and get out of the car, quickly coming over to sit next to you. i wrap my arm around you, gently rubbing your arm and shoulder. “hey, what happened?” the way you look up at me, your eyes glossing over with tears, makes my heart ache.

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you look up at him, trying your best not to cry. you know he hates to see you upset like this. you unlock your phone and open it to the “sorry, can't make it” text. he takes the phone from you, eyebrows furrowing as he reads it. “really? he didn't even give you a reason?” you take your phone back. “oh, it gets worse.” you go onto snapchat and open his story before passing it to chris. you watch as his jaw clenches, a subtle but clear sign that he's mad.

“i can't fucking believe this guy,” he exclaims as he hands your phone back to you. “i don't understand how he could do that to you. it's his loss though, you look beautiful.” you smile at chris, a genuine smile, he always knows how to cheer you up. “thank you. and you're right, i can do better.”

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chris’ pov: there's a few moments of silence before i take a deep breath and speak up again. “listen, i have an idea. i know that neither of us have ever been on a real date, but i want to take you out on one.”

i watch as you shake your head. “no, it's okay. i think i should just go home. i just wasn't meant to go on a date tonight.” i run my hand through my hair. “please? you deserve to be taken out on a real date.”

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you think it over for a moment before you end up agreeing. he takes your hand as the both of you stand up and he holds it the whole way to his car, only letting go to open the door for you. you both get in and get comfortable. “so, where are we going, princess?”

the nickname catches you off guard a little, but it's sweet that he's calling you that. “honestly, i kind of feel like just going to a drive-thru.” he chuckles as he starts the car, not expecting that to be your answer. “alright, whatever you want.” he starts the car and starts driving around the city.

he pulls into a drive-thru lineup of a place you both agreed on. the line moves fast and before you know it, you're holding the bag of food while he's driving to some sort of mystery spot.

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chris’ pov: i know the perfect spot to take you. i like coming here to have a moment alone with my thoughts, and it has an amazing view. by the time we get there, the sun has just started to set. it's completely deserted, not far from the beach. we eat our food, talking and laughing between bites. it seems like you completely forgot about the other guy and it puts me at ease to see that.

after we finish eating, we watch the sun go down, enjoying the comfortable silence between us. you check your phone and i don't pay any mind to it, deciding to check mine too. i glance over and notice that you're on snap, more specifically, his snap. i snatch your phone out of your hand before you can check his story. “nope, you're not doing that. forget about him. he's not good enough for you.”

“i wasn't even going to-” “shhh, i know what you were doing.” you're silent for a moment. “what if i get back at him?” “and how would we do that?” i ask with an amused smirk.

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“i could post us on my story. he doesn't know who you are, so he'd think i'm on a real date.” he scoffs, pretending to be offended, “wow, not a real date, huh? i thought we had something, princess.” you nudge his shoulder with yours, causing him to smile after trying to hold it back.

you take your phone back from him and go onto snapchat to take the picture for your story. he leans in close to you as you get the camera angle just right. suddenly, he turns his head and plants a wet kiss on your cheek, just as you hit the button. you weren't expecting it, but it came out perfectly. “ew, chris, it's slobbery!” you giggle. he laughs too and posts the picture to your story for you.

“wanna go for a walk on the beach?” he asks. “sure, sounds fun.” he gets out of the car first and as he shuts his door, he notices your hand on the door handle. “wait!” he climbs over the hood of his car, almost falling in the process as you laugh at his ridiculous gesture. he opens the car door for you, a goofy grin on his face. you step out of the car, thanking him between fits of laughter. “you could've just went around, you know.” “i didn’t think of that.. it was more fun that way anyways.”

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chris’ pov: we make our way down to the beach and we walk along the shoreline, stopping every now and then to admire the clusters of stars that are appearing in the sky. as night falls, i notice you begin to shiver in your dress. i unzip my gray hoodie*, shrugging it off and draping it across your shoulders. “here, take this.” “thank you.” you slip your arms in and zip it up about three quarters of the way as we continue to walk.

*yes, that gray hoodie.

you suddenly stop, giving my arm a gentle tug as you do so to get my attention. i always thought it was so cute when you did that. “can we get ice cream?” i look to where you're pointing and there's a small ice cream shop. it's hidden, kind of tucked away but it looks open. “mhmm, whatever you want.”

we go in, ordering a bowl with two scoops, each getting a scoop of our favourite flavour. we sit across from each other in a booth and share the ice cream. we stay until the last workers are practically shoving us out the door so they can close up.

we walk along the beach together, back the way we came, hand in hand. it's nice to take our time, not having a worry or care in the world as we enjoy each other's company and the sounds of the waves.

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you eventually get to the parking lot and once we're in the car, he lets you pick the music. it's about a twenty minute drive to your house. when you're about five minutes away, he notices you starting to drift off a little. he places his hand on your knee, giving it a gentle shake to wake you up. “hey, don't fall asleep on me now,” he murmurs, “we're almost there.”

he parks in your driveway and turns the car off so you can both get out. you shoot him a confused look. “you don't have to walk me to the door, it's like 30 steps away,” you say with a light smile. “i know but i wanted to.” he walks to your door with you and you start to unzip his sweater. “no, it's fine. i'll get it another time.” he holds you tightly as you pull him into a hug. “thank you, chris. this was the best date ever.” you pull away and give him one last goodbye before going inside, shutting the door behind you.

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[hysteria-things]

english isn’t my first language so i probably wrote something wrong

but

can u write smut with matt or chris (i don’t care who) where it’s readers first time receiving oral

WOULDN'T MIND

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: soft dom!chris x reader

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: you’ve been talking to this kid from your school, and the first hang out with him will be something to remember.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: SMUTTY, swearing, making out, marking if you squint, titty playing lol, fingering, oral (female receiving), masturbation (male)

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 907

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: hello <3

being in the talking stage can be scary. on your birthday a few months ago, you got a notification on snapchat that read: chris sturniolo wants to be your friend!

you heard his name get thrown around all over school, so it wouldn’t hurt to add him back, right? what you don’t know is that this is the kid you’ll be almost dating.

the two of you lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling and discussing whatever your minds think of. this is the first time you guys hung out outside of school, and you can sense that something’s there. even though your friends told you the talking stage is the most dangerous.

his head rests gently on yours, some strands of hair tickling your face. “you never had a boyfriend, right?”

you chuckle, solemnly from embarrassment, but nod. “nope. i haven’t even had my first kiss yet.”

he only lets out a hum, and then it’s silent. your mind races with a million negative thoughts.

he is so going to kick you out of his house. he’s never going to want to speak with you again. he thinks you’re a loser—

“i wouldn’t mind being the first.”

eyes widening, you turn your head to see chris already looking at you. he smirks, taking his thumb and rubbing it over your bottom lip. “relax.” he mumbles, leaning in to kiss you soft and slow.

he rolls on top of you, depending the kiss before he starts running his hands under your shirt. he hesitates, but when you don’t protest, he gently cups your boobs and plays with them.

his lips travel to your neck. after a few pecks, your breath hitches, and that’s when he knows he found your sweet spot. squeezing your legs together, wetness starts to pool.

biting down, he sucks a mark carefully into your skin. a purple bruise forms as his fingers start to enter your waistband. “is this okay?”

“more than okay,” you answer out of breath.

when he gets your consent, his middle finger moves up and down on your folds, coating it with your slickness. you moan lowly, arching ever so slightly. you’re a straight-up virgin, but it’s not like you’ve never fingered yourself. alas, his fingers are much better than yours.

“m-more.” you beg. “please.”

the chuckle that leaves his throat tickles your neck. then, he takes his ring finger and circles your clit while putting the other one into your hole.

a high-pitched sound escapes your lips, mouth open with your eyes crossing. you rut your hips on his fingers, the tips of them brushing at all the right spots on your bud and walls. “f-fuck, yes.” you gasp.

the sound of arousal coating his fingers fills your ears, only making you moan louder and squeeze around him. “you like that, huh?” he whispers.

you nod frantically, moving your hips faster only for him to take his digits out. “want to feel my tongue, instead?“

a shiver runs up your spine, the softness of his lips grazing down your body as he also removes your shorts. despite it being dark and the only light in the room is his lamp, the glistening of your pussy is as clear as day.

to tease you, he licks the arousal stuck to your thighs. so close yet so far from where you want him most. you squirm, but stop once his arms wrap tightly under your knees and hold you in place.

you wince at the sudden contact with your clit, his mouth sucking on it with force. then, his tongue licks strands up your folds.

eyebrows furrowing, you pant uncontrollably. this just doesn’t feel real, but it is; and my god it feels good. his muscle goes into your sopping cunt, causing a whimper to leave your lips. “o-oh, fuck. oh-oh my god, chris.”

your hands have a mind of their own and run up your body to your tits, kneading them and toying with your nipples to get even more pleasure. he groans, the vibration having your eyes roll back.

he takes one of his hands and inserts it in your pussy along with his tongue. however, the other one finds its way into his underwear.

his palm wraps around his aching cock, pumping it quickly to the speed of the way his tongue and finger fuck you.

“don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t stop!” you repeat loudly, gripping his hair harshly.

the moans that come from him don’t help with the way your orgasm starts to build. the way he’s moving at different angles inside of you has your legs shaking, squeezing tight around his head.

chris’ thumb twirls around his tip, pre-cum leaking from it as he whimpers into your pussy. your moans gradually get louder and higher, before the knot snaps and you smear your cum all over his face.

he removes himself, resting his cheek on your leg. you’re catching your breath, but he’s still groaning and whimpering while his hand moves rapidly.

nuzzling his head more into your flesh, his knees buckle together as he moans. his hot, sticky cum spurts out and makes a mess on his hand. dripping so much that it lands on the floor below.

in silence, you guys stay in the position to catch your breath. what you do know for a fact is that this wouldn’t be the first or last time you hang out with chris sturniolo.

𝐭𝐚𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭!

@bunbunbl0gs @lexisecretaccx @thy-mission @angelic-sturniolos111 @sophssturn @mattsneezing @janiellasblog @blahbel668 @meg-sturniolo @mattslolita @sturnbaby @imwetforyourmom @tillies33ssss @sturnifyed @mayhem-72 @ripmattitude @p1xieswrld @alorsxsturn @txssvx @sttzee @multiluvr @delilahprentiss @matthewsspecial @sturnolio-luvs @sturniolho @suga-daddy-69 @tworosesblackthorn @luckistar-posts @gnxosblog @junnniiieee07 @sturnioloslurps @tylerthecreatorsrealwife @flowerxbunnie @imaslut4kehlani @sturniolosandmoree @hertvgirl @whoreforchrissturniolo @sturniolotriplettoplover @stars4matt @freshsturns @loverrsposts @sturnlcvr @elliesturniolo1 @tpvmz @user283926392 @lalalands86 @sukiipjs @sturniologirl813 @leahrab @chrissturniolosslut @h3arts4harry @sturnioloblogs @creamoncreamoncream2 @luv4kozume @ivyyyyyysposts @mirxcle1 @iluvm4ttsturni0l0 @catalina-island @mbsbaby @mattsdollie @pinkfarts @slut4mattsturn @thesturniolos @vickeyzloserz @nononopenono1 @bitchydragonparadise @gdsvhtwa @hrt-attack @bellasfavbisexual @dwntwn-strnlo @venusbabysblog @meerkatzthings @crazychrisl0v3r @maggieflms @strtuniolo @mutualsafe @riasturns @sturniolowhore @antpile00 @ashley9282828 @stingerayyy2 @sturnsjtop @sturncakez

[axelsagewrites]

Roy Kent*Future Mrs Gramma

Pairing: roy x f!reader, bestie!jamie x platonic reader

Word count: 1240

Warnings: drinking, angry roy, swearing

Masterlist Here

You and Jamie were the type of friends that wouldn’t see ach other for weeks, months even, then as soon as the other came into sight you were barrelling into their arms for a hug and to jump right back into your last conversation. So, when Jamie found out you were moving to London, only a ten-minute drive from his work no less, he was ecstatic to say the least.

As much as you loved Jamie you never particularly cared about football which weirdly made your friendship better but after Jamie had come round for drinks at your new flat in your drunken haze you decided it was a great idea to go down to Richmond to continue the celebrations. It only took 20 quid and a questionable grounds keeper to get in and soon you were drinking in the stands with your best friend.

“I’m on top of the world!” Jamie half screamed, standing on top of the seat beside where you sat.

You giggled as you hauled yourself up to stand on the seat next to him, “Woohoo!”

-

The sun light pierced your skull as your eyes slowly began to drag themselves open. The piercing ring of a whistle burned your ear as you pulled yourself up. Looking around you remembered where you were. Fuck. You and Jamie must’ve fallen asleep last night lying on the ground in a row of seats at least 15 rows back. On the upside this meant the footballers on the pitch couldn’t see you as they practised but, on the downside, they were already here!?

“Pst, Jamie,” you whispered as you shoved at the lump whose head had been lying opposite of yours. Jamie just mumbled something as he rolled on his side. Almost as if fate you could hear a very deep, and very angry voice yell “where the fuck is Tartt?”

“Get up,” you gritted your teeth, holding back gagging as you tried to both nurse your hangover and wake up the log beside you. you sighed before pinching his nose.

Jamie began to flap, swatting at your hands, before managing to sit up and out of your grip, “What the fuck man?” he yelled before his eyes fell to the pitch, “Fuck,” he mumbled as you face palmed.

“Tartt!” the voice screamed, heavy footsteps following.

Thank god you were at the furthest away seats. “It was nice knowing you Jamie,” you sighed, patting his shoulder.

“You’re fucked if he catches you too, ya know?”

“Fuck,” you looked up over the seat to see a relatively built man in his 30s thundering over to the section you were in.

“Who the hell is there?” the gruff voice called out as he climbed into the stands.

It was now or never. thank god your parents forced you to do track you thought as you pulled yourself to your feet and began to book it. you heard Jamies cheers as you began to essentially jump down the rows over the seats, all while trying not to spew. The man trying to catch you paused, debating which person to chase first as Jamie took off running the other way.

Sadly, he chose you. however luckily for you he tried to chase you into the seats, and you were, somehow, faster than him despite him being a professional footballer. The number of times you and Jamie had to run away from the people he’d mouthed off to had apparently came in handy as you jumped out the stands, onto the pitch, and began to sprint.

You could hear the man start to chase you but refused to turn around, instead heading straight to the exit, screaming, “I fucking hate you Jamie!” as you ran. Somehow you made it to the parking lot with the worst stitch of your life and a snapchat from Jamie keeled over laughing at the side of the pitch.

-

You swore from then on to avoid Richmond like the plague. That was until Jamie texted you saying he needed a lift cause his car had a flat tire. as you sat in the parking lot, tapping on your steering wheel bored out your nut you heard the metal door clang as it slammed open. You looked up, half expecting to see Jamie, and instead finally seeing those angry eyes up close. “Oh fuck,”

“You!” you could see him mouth, his finger jabbing at you as you locked the car doors. He stormed over, tapping on your window.

You let it down ever so slightly, “Hello,” you said, as if nothing had happened.

“Hi,”

“Can I help you?”

“Can you fucking-I-how-I mean-you run fucking fast!” he eventually managed out prompting you to raise an eyebrow, “Aren’t you gonna roll your window down all the way?”

“Last time I saw you, you were chasing me,”

“That’s cause you and your prick boyfriend broke into the stadium,”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” you said, and a strange look washed over his face you couldn't quite read, “Besides he said you made him run 30 laps hungover. I think we’re even,”

This time he squinted, his weird look vanishing, “Maybe I should make you run 30 laps,”

You couldn’t help but snort at his words, “Id like to see you fucking try,” you said as a few other footballers began to walk out, all looking away when he glared at them, “Roy, right?”

“Yeah, who are you?” he asked. You figured with witnesses now he couldn’t murder you so rolled the window down all the way and stuck your hand out to introduce yourself. His shake was firm, his skin rough as sandpaper, but for some reason you were sad to let go, “Id like to say it was nice to meet you,”

“Don’t worry,” you said, turning the car on when you saw Jamie finally sauntering out, “feelings mutual,” you said before beeping your horn and leaning out the window, “Get a fucking move on mate,” you called at Jamie before ducking back into the car. “And don’t worry, I’ve learned my lesson. I hate running,”

“Me too,”

You tilted your head in confusion, a trait Roy found oddly endearing, “You’re a footballer?”

“I know,” he said as if talking to a small child making you roll your eyes, “What can I say? I’m a fucking idiot,”

“Alright grampa don’t be too hard on yourself,” Jamie grinned as he climbed into the passenger seat. You however turned around and smacked his arm, “Eh! What’s that for?”

“You told me three. Its fucking almost four you twat,”

“Practise ran over! blame him,” he said, pointing at Roy who was already rolling his eyes.

“Call us even then?” you sighed, turning to Roy. He nodded and started to walk away as you put the car into first gear only to be interrupted by Roy walking back over, “You, okay?”

“Yeah, just wondering,” he paused for a second, “You gonna be at the next game?”

You glanced at Jamie whose eyes were bulging out his sockets before laughing. “Dunno, should I be?”

“Wouldn’t mind it if you were,”

“Might just come then,” you grinned, “See you around Roy,” you said but all he did was nod and step away so you could finally drive off.

Jamie groaned as you drove out the parking lot, “Oh god you’re gonna fuck a grampa,”

“Not just any grampa,” you laughed at him, “I’m gonna be your step gramma.”

Ted Lasso Taglist: @gee72sstuff

General Taglist: @obx-josie18 @ravenmoore14 @tessakate

[irisreality]

My Success story (with proofs) 🎀🫶

Hey guys I know it's a been a long time since I posted anything here but I'm coming with a big success story, as u know @adambja is selling an amazing self concept + void tapes, she customized my tape as I wanted to be (ps:they're not affs she put some potions and her own method and secrets in them).

So yeah, my goal was having my SP back and transform to how I want him to be and gain a great self concept + enhancing my features 🥹 kid u not the first day I listened to the tape (I putted in my headphones and went to sleep) when I wake up I had that intrusive thought of opening Snapchat, guess who I found out on it ? yes my SP in my Snapchat's suggestions YES ! , she told me that he'll come back with another account since I blocked him from Litt everything I was impatient 😋🫶 so I added him, he accepted me and we talked, damnnn istg it was a whole another person, tender and gentle 😭 like he's another one frl, the most funniest part didn't comes yet lol, he asked if I want to see him I said yes, (ps: I told Adambja that I want him to become a gym rat cuz I love big boys hihi) all his pictures were in the gym, his back now is bigger than my attitude dammmmn I was chocked 😭💘💘 he's now the perfect version of himself, we talked for almost a week but now I cut the ropes with him, I feel like I deserve a better one Ngl 😋, beside my SP I'm having a massive amount of compliments like many people has stopped me to say that I'm so beautiful lol + my features now are enhanced and my eyes are bigger, even my teachers now are noticing me more and asking me questions. All this happened in three days 🤭🩷, like Imaaaagine !!

This tape did miracles to me 😭💘 @Adambja thank u so much babe u were and still always my favorite coach ever, I'm coming back to your void's tape at this point 🤭❤️❤️❤️

[bakugoushotwife]

TLC

a/n: this lovely lil comfort fic was requested by my lawfully wedded wife, @keigotakamiz !! i know hawks if your brainchild, so i hope i did him justice! as for everyone else, i know i know, a sfw fic???

pairings: keigo takami (hawks) x fem!reader

cw: periods, comfort, just fluff tehee

wc: 2k

Keigo was extremely perceptive. He may have a carefully curated persona for the other pro-heroes and the hero commission, and that was not one of a loving and considerate partner. But for you, his character was thrown out the window. He was empathetic, highly in tune with you and actually a very doting and caring man. That’s why he was so anxious, you haven’t been yourself all day. Your replies have been short and almost angry with him while he’s been on patrol, and you turned down every option for lunch he offered. This was utterly unlike you, his easygoing, warm, and bubbly girlfriend. So he cuts his patrol short, Mirko owes him one anyway, she’ll take over. He realizes what must be interfering with his pretty girl’s mood, so he stops to get you the food he knows you’ll like because it’s the only thing you ever crave on your period. He takes the liberty to get some other stuff too, some flowers just to see you smile, a few sweet snacks for after lunch, and the ugliest stuffed animal he could find, an inside joke for the two of you. It started years ago, when you were both still teenagers. He found a Frankenstein-esque plush and held it up next to his face, claiming it was his twin. Ever since then, you’ve gifted each other horrendous stuffed animals just to get the other one to laugh. 

He’s hoping this plan will be foolproof, cutting his day short to come check on you was rarely something you took as a good thing, never wanting to be the reason that he didn’t take his job as seriously as you would hope. However, he felt like this was a special exception, given your curt texts and irritated looking snapchats. He takes the bags and carefully secures them, flying over to your place to get there as quickly as possible. He ducks inside through the open window, looking around your vacant living room and kitchen. He tucks his wings back down, not noticing anything out of place. He approaches your closed door, extending his hand to push it open. His suspicions are confirmed by the darkness of your room, the curtains drawn tightly and the TV on low volume. You were splayed out on the bed, cuddling a pillow for dear life. At the sound of your door creaking open, you sit up quickly, prepared to chuck the pillow at your intruder. 

Your arm falls to the side when you see your boyfriend standing in the doorway, slightly illuminated by the light in the hall. He closes his eyes and gives you a sweet soft smile, holding the shopping bags up by his face. 

“Hey pretty girl. I thought you could use some TLC.” He hums, closing the door behind him before making his way to the edge of your bed. Your irritated gaze slightly softens at the sight of him, and you flop back into laying down, groaning aloud. 

Your back is turned to him, arms still wrapped tightly around that pillow. He sighs a bit. You’re definitely on your period. He reaches his hand out to rest on your hip, squeezing the bone gently. He pushes his glasses up to function as a headband, and he tugs his earmuffs down around his neck. 

“I brought you some food.” He coos, a singsong lilt to his voice as if he’s enticing you to eat. 

You groan again, flailing your body against the pillow. “Don’t wanna eat.” 

“Yes you do, you just don’t wanna sit up.” He chuckles out knowingly, his gloved fingers wrapping around your wrist to pull you into a seated position. You certainly don’t help him at all, all your body weight working against him. He sighs, moderately amused by you. He knows better than anyone how clingy you tend to be around this time of the month. You’re powerful and independent, all things he values about you, but he can’t deny how nice it feels to be needed, even if you were playing hard to get. You wouldn’t admit it, but he’d ask anyway.  “Aw, babygirl, did you miss me?” 

You huff, rolling your eyes at him before snatching the bags he brought. You squirm under the covers, a sure sign that you’re pleased by his offering. You fished out your food and some medicine he brought, and finally, your gaze towards him becomes loving, and you lean into his body. He smiles, knowing you missed him more than anything, and while all these goodies were nice, all you ever wanted was him by your side. Sure, you’ll feign annoyance in the fact he took the rest of the day off to hold you and eat shitty convenience store snacks, but after that, you’ll cry your annoyance out in his shirt and then fall peacefully asleep to him telling you all about patrol. 

“Somebody definitely missed me.” He gleams, a shit-eating grin splayed across his cheeks as he presses a kiss to yours. 

You hum in agreement, popping the pills for some relief and picking at the food he brought you. He reached over you and grabbed the bag, digging out the ugly stuffed animal he brought you. It was supposed to be some sort of bird, he thinks, but the way it was printed across the fabric made it look more like a feathered…deer or something. What a perfect gift. He holds it up excitedly. 

“Another one to add to the collection, it made me think of you.” He jests, setting it in your lap. He watches you in adoration, the giggle you give him after you see it was worth any attitude he needed to disarm to get to his sweet girl again. 

You pick up the stuffed animal and hug it close, chuckling at the ugly thing. “Say you, I’m pretty sure this was a misprint of your merchandise.” You tease, checking the tag to confirm your suspicions. Now you’re howling, the ugly stuffed animal was no animal—it was a severely fucked up version of your superhero man. 

He yanks it back from you to see the tag himself, shaking his head at his hero name scrawled across the label. He’s chortling too, horrified by such a mistake but glad it could bring you such joy. Laughter is the best medicine after all, aside from snuggles, of course. You reach over and tug the toy back, cuddling it back to your chest. 

“This is my prized possession now.” 

He rolls his eyes, taking the opportunity to properly remove most of Hawks’ uniform, placing his glasses, earmuffs, and gloves on the bedside table. He shrugs out of his heavy coat and slips out of his boots, tossing the fabric to the floor. He’s certainly not getting out of bed now, not when you’re eating willingly and leaning into his side, an appetizer to cuddling. You groan at the feeling of another cramp rolling through, the medicine not kicking in yet. You pout, your bottom lip wavering and wobbling as you remember how bad the day has been, and that Keigo must have taken the day off to come to your rescue too, and you laid out of work! 

He knew it was coming, so he turns his body a little more to give you access to his chest, where you promptly bury your head under his guidance. His hand comes up to secure you there, resting on the back of your head. The sounds of your little sobs and sniffles soon follow, and he nearly chuckles at how you try to quieten yourself even after all this time. He figures you’re a bit embarrassed to be vulnerable, and he supposes that bit still applies to him as well. But still, you were a leading lady on your own, perhaps it made you feel a little silly to reduce yourself to needing his comfort, so he wouldn’t rub it in too bad. 

“Oh, c’mon babe. Let loose. It’s just you and me anyway, let me be your lil tissue.” He hums encouragingly, his other hand rubbing circles in your back. 

“It’s just be-been such a r-r-rough day!” You stutter through your tears, your wails certainly increase in loudness though, and your hands grasp at his black and yellow turtleneck. He hums through it, knowing you just needed to get it out for a second. 

“I bet, sweets. I’m sorry you’re feeling so bad, but you know I’m not going anywhere ‘til you feel better.” He says, leaning back a little so he could see your face. He smiles sympathetically, holding your tear-stained cheeks in his warm hands. “And before you even start, Mirko owed me a favor anyway so everything’s covered.” 

You smile softly at his comforts, your eyes fluttering shut from the sweet paths his thumbs rubbed in your skin. His smile spreads a bit, and he leans forward to kiss your forehead. 

“Wanna lay down? I’m multi-use, tissue, wallet, sex machine, heating pad, etc, etc.” He smirks a bit, laying back against your impossibly comfortable pillows. He understood why you clung to one until he got here. “C’mere, wanna hold you.” He says a little bit more commanding, just in case you were thinking of being difficult. 

You laugh softly, crawling on your hands and knees back up to your positioning on the bed. He lay on his back, his arms spread to the side as he waited for you to pick exactly how you wanted to curl up on him. He gives you such a kind smile, amber eyes twinkling with his adoration for you. You can’t help but return his grin, his energy always contagious. He reaches out for your hip, tugging you closer to him. You both snicker a bit as you fall the short distance to his chest, laying with your top half stomach down on top of him, legs tangled together in an effort to create maximum comfort. 

“There. Much better, now, huh?” He quizzes, the pads of his fingers smoothing circles into your lower back. You nod, heaving out a long sigh as you snuggle your face into his warmth. 

He knew it wouldn’t be long until you fell asleep, and the prospect made him smile. Whether you ever said it or not, being the only person that could ease your pain and lull you back to sleep was the highest of achievements in his book. He would relish the way you snore lightly and the way you would squirm closer and closer to him as if you wanted to be in his skin. He’ll flip on a show to watch, mostly just for the background noise, because he would watch you sleep. You always looked so peaceful, the stress lines in your face relaxed and your nose twitching on occasion. You were a work of art, maybe a difficult one, but his nonetheless, and he wouldn’t trade this for anything. He prided himself. He can read all your signs, know exactly what you need, and be that. It was the only thing he really wanted to be good at, and luckily he seemed to be a natural at it. He looks down, and sure enough, your lips are parted and barely audible snores slip out. He smirks, and turns the TV up a little, his eyes comfortably watching you sleep until a nap claims him, too.

[yespleasetommyshelby]

After he cheats - Modern!Tommy Shelby x reader

Look at me bashing two out in two days 😉

Part 2 of Before he cheats!🫣

-----

Tommy sighed as Arthur's car pulled up out front of the garage, a place his cars spent way too much time on account of all the bullet holes and busted windows he managed to acquire on a weekly basis. He couldn't help but let his head fall back onto the headrest as his eyes landed on his beat up Land Rover sitting on the forecourt, after y/n's little show 2 days ago he'd had Johnny dogs pick it up and bring it over, he's almost forgotten about the thick jagged cut that now ran the length of the car, until now.

"Troubles with that Sabini again, lad?" Head mechanic David laughed as Tommy stepped out into the open, his childhood friend always taking pleasure out of seeing Tommy's latest car disaster, and the payments that came with it of course.

"What is it they say?" Arthur called as he walked around the car to join the pair, smirking as his eyes caught the smash in the windscreen. "Hell have no fury like a woman scorned." He couldn't help but laugh, holding his side as he smacked Tommy in the shoulder making the younger brother huff.

"Very funny Arthur." He nodded, a small, almost unnoticeable smirk appearing on his face at the thought of just how pissed off you had looked that afternoon, but he'd fix it, you two always did.

"Damn, that girl of yours has got a temper aye." David whistled as he pulled open the passenger door and laid eyes on the messily carved name across the seat. "Remind me to never get on the wrong side of her." He mumbled as he slammed the door.

"Look can you fix it or not?" He put it bluntly, he had things to do if he was ever going to fix this situation, and he believed it would take a whole load of fixing.

"Who are you asking exactly? You know I can fix this baby back up, but it'll take a while, and it ain't gunna be cheap." David smiled, knowing that while he never overcharged the Shelby brothers, being technically in their employment, he always knew that with a Shelby fix came a big bonus.

"Just get it done." He nodded pointing at David. "Sooner the better David." He called as he walked back towards the car with Arthur in tow.

"Where to now Tom?" Arthur asked as they climbed into his car, having one last laugh at the state of Tommy's car.

"It's been 2 days Arthur, 2 days and still nothing." Tommy muttered, pulling his phone out and checking to no avail. So that's what it feels like, he thought to himself in regret, never meaning for any of this to go the way that it did.

"Take me to her Arthur."

-----

"Bollox!"

"He's lying to you!"

"Don't say I didn't fucking warn you!"

"See! What did I say? Dickheads, the lot of you!" I I huffed to the Netflix couple before slamming my laptop screen shut. "Even on TV the men are knobheads, honestly." I muttered to myself as I picked up the last tub of ice cream that was sitting besides my bed, the place I'd been for the last 2 days since I walked away from the Shelby family.

Flopping backwards into the bed I groaned as I dropped the empty tub onto the floor, my dreams of more ice cream demolished at the realisation. "Seriously y/n, laid in bed shouting at Netflix and crying over the ice cream being all gone, how stereotypical can you get." I huffing to myself as I pulled myself up to once again silence the vibrating of my phone. Over 99+ missed calls and messages, mainly from Tommy, Polly and Ada a few from Esme, John and Arthur, and that's not including the facebooks, instagrams and snapchats that I'd recieved over the last 48 hours.

A loud pounding on the door shook me to my core as my phone flew from my hand landing on the opposite side of the room, the vibrations continuing to slide it around on the wooden floor. "Shit, shit, shit." I whispered as I rested my hand on my chest, he wouldn't call the police would he? "Obviously he wouldn't idiot, local gangster, duh." I whispered once again, smacking myself on the forehead gently. "Gracie, oh I swear to god if I get arrested because of her I will kill her, and that is a promise - Oh fuck, I'm coming!" My Grace rant was interrupted by another loud set of banging on the front door.

Taking a deep breath I swung the door open prepared to be facing the boys in blue only to sigh in relief, kind of, to be met with a pair ice blue eyes and an old school cap.

"Fucking Jesus, honestly could you knock any more like a copper?" I breathed out, my heart racing from the panic. "This is why I need a ring doorbell." I sighed stepping back into the flat and leaving the door open for him to follow, knowing that if I closed the door I would probably have to buy a new one after he kicks it in.

"So you can see if it's the police?" Tommy asked as he closed the door behind himself, making himself comfortable at the kitchen table as I busied myself boiling the kettle.

"No, so I can see if it's you and then I'Il know not to answer." I muttered, flicking the kettle off. "I'm gunna need something stronger." Reaching for the whisky and glasses I filled 2 before sliding one across the table to him. "So what do you want?" I asked, leaning against the side on the opposite side of the kitchen, knowing distance is best in these situations.

"I think it's probably time I explained." He muttered, reaching into his pocket he pulled out his pack of cigarettes lighting one for himself before sliding them over to me.

"You don't say." I said sarcastically, taking two of his cigarettes and tucking one away behind my ear for later. "Go on then." I waved him on before lighting my own, revelling in the small smirk that took over his face.

"A few weeks ago now, some Irish inspector showed up at the shop spouting some bullshit about knowing about the races and all that shit." He nodded to himself, tilting his head back as he let out a breath of smoke, the vein popping in his neck as he did so. "Now, as much as we've had issues with the coppers in the past he knew too much, and he knew things that I haven't even put into place yet." I watched as he spoke, the vein in his forehead poking out slightly at the thought of good old Inspector Campbell and his dodgy leg.

"Right.." I trialled off as he stopped speaking, tapping the ash down the sink as an excuse to look away, not wanting to get caught up in his eyes like I had done so many times before. "And what's that got to do with you spending every free minute you have with Gracie?" I asked with a head tilt, purposely trying to make him feel a little bit stupid, like he had with me so often.

"Gracie? Really?" He asked with raised eyebrows and a smirk, he'd noticed it the other day, that you'd taken to calling her Gracie, with a slight nod of your head he carried on. "Well, she just happened to show up all of a week later, walked straight into the garrison and asked for a job which, with Arthur being Arthur, was handed to her the minute she fluttered her eyes at him." He recalled, thinking back to how pissed he had been at his brothers idiocy, not even a reference check before he'd handed the girl an apron.

"Is there a short version of this story?" I sighed, tired of standing here and listening to him speak, as much as I was holding on with a brave face I couldn't wait for him to leave so I could cry myself to sleep once again, after heading out to grab some more ice cream, of course.

"The short story is I spoke to Mae at the station and it turns out Grace had been sent from some specialist unit to get any info she could find on us. And when I found that out I decided to use her for my own gain, I told her false information, got her and her little team halfway up to Scotland as we speak." He shrugged, as though his actions were totally justified.

"So that's it?" I asked with furrowed brows, smushing out the remains of the cigarette in the sink before washing it down the drain. "You threw 10 years of friendship and over 2 years of us away for some silly little copper that got your knickers in a fucking twist?!" I yelled, picking up the closest thing which happened to be the now empty whisky glass besides me and throwing I at the wall just to the right of his head my eyes not leaving as his as the glass shattered.

"Uh, yes?" His confident demeanour gone as he looked at me in confusion, truly believeing that if he'd told you his side of the story, the real story then all would be well and you'd have his ring back on your finger in no time.

"Okay, that's fantastic Tom, really great, thanks for letting me know." I nodded. "Do make sure you close the door on your way out." I sighed as I walked past, pulling my wrist out of the way as I felt his touch.

"What the fucks going on? Nothing happened with the two of us, I promise you." He pleaded as he followed me into the bedroom, his eyes quickly scanning the boxes of tissues and the 3 empty ice cream tubs that littered the floor. "3 tubs in two days, aye." He couldn't help but comment.

"Yep." I muttered. Liar, the voice in my head spoke, that's just from this morning. "You've explained, now can you just, go, please." I whispered, my head starting to pound as I stood looking out of the window, the empty street of Watery Lane a poor distraction.

"Look Y/n, I know I fucked up, believe me I do, I never wanted to lie to you or keep you in the dark but, fuck, y/n you know the shit that I do, that I'm involved with, if anything ever happened to you I don't know what I'd do. The only way to keep you safe was to keep you in the dark, but it won't ever happen again." He stayed back as he spoke, knowing that if he tried to touch you at this precise moment in time the only thing he'd be walking away with would be a split lip and a lower sperm count from the boot he'd receive in the crotch.

"That's rest Tommy, really, is that supposed to make me feel better? Supposed to make me feel like any less of an idiot? Everyone saw the two of you together Tom! Just in the last two days I've had so many messages offering their sorry because they've heard we've split up and you're with fucking Gracie!" I screamed, spinning around just as the tears began to fall. "You've made a fucking fool out of me Thomas Shelby!" I screeched, flinging the desk lamp towards him. "Get the fuck out!" I whispered, counting to ten in my head. "Please just fucking go!" I cried, runnning my hands through my hair as I tried to steady my breathing.

"Alright, I'll go." He muttered, looking down at his feet. "I'll walk away and never come back, never even look in your direction again if that's what you want." He watched as you stood with your back to him, his own heart breaking at the sight of your small shoulders shaking with silent sobs, the image of your reflection of your hand over your own mouth burned into his mind. "I know that you might not want this back right now, or ever, from me anyway.." He said with a sigh, reaching into his pocket to pull out the diamond ring that you'd thrown at to the ground two days ago. "But it's yours, whether you're mine or not y/n this ring will always be yours, as well as my heart. I get that I've made you think the worse time and time again and I will never stop apologising or trying to make it up to you, no matter how long it'll take. And that's a promise. I love you y/f/n, please don't ever forget it." He finished, placing the small ring on the table besides the bedroom door before shoving his hands into his pockets and turning to leave.

He stood for a second with the front door open, with a view into your bedroom he turned one last time, willing with everything that he had that you'd turn and come running, tell him that you love him and can out this whole Grace shit behind you, but no, with one last sigh he stepped out onto the street and closed he door behind him.

Hearing the door slam I spun around, my eyes landing on the small ring, the light bouncing off of the biggest diamond sitting proudly in the centre. Sliding down the wall I let out a heart breaking cry, the sobs no longer silent as the tears slid down my cheeks one after the other, one hand squeezing my chest as though trying to hold my heart together while the other tried unsuccessfully to muffle the sobs of a broken heart.

[alittlebitofloveliness]

Do you have any Dallas Winston hcs? Either in present day or modern day?

Hi anon! Sure, I can try my best, sorry if they’re not the best Dally is tricky for me to write.

(Sort of) Modern Dallas Winston Headcanons:

-Is not a dog person OR a cat person but a secret third thing: a ferret person. He had two back in New York but sold them when he ran to Tulsa

-Ignores best before dates completely. Unless food is mouldy or smells RANK bro will still eat it

-Has a half sister ten years older than him on his dad’s side who looked after him when he was really little…until she got addicted to heroin. Dally hates her and misses her all at the same time. She was still alive when he ran to Tulsa but he has no idea if she’s still alive now.

-Loves anything cinnamon flavoured. Bro would fuck up a bag of cinnamon hearts.

-He likes to sit near couples who are very obviously nervous on first dates and do stuff to make them awkward/uncomfortable. Sometimes he enlists Two-bit’s help and they chew with their mouths open and tell gross stories really loudly. Once he brought Johnny and loudly gave him the sex talk when some couple was starting to get handsy and Johnny didn’t speak to him for a solid week.

-Jumping middle schoolers is a weird sort of way of getting back at the universe because he got jumped a bunch of times when he was their age and why should they have it better than him?

-Has a favourite horse he jockeys, a pretty, spirited, kind of mean horse called Lullabelle that he plans to steal if he ever has to run from Tulsa the way he ran from new york

-Refuses to ever talk about why he ran from New York

-Modern Dally would hate vapes and think they’re for folks who ‘can’t handle real cigs’

-Is almost as much of a car guy as Soda and Steve

-Couldn’t see him liking much social media. Maybe Snapchat a little bit but in general I think he wouldn’t be super plugged in, mostly because he didn’t have much access to technology as a kid 

-Stole Johnny his Jean jacket which is part of why Johnny likes it so much

-Always smells RANK, hygiene is not his number one priority (or even his number 2)

-Has a bunch of dumb tattoos, like none of them have meaning he just thought they looked cool and WILL regret some of them one day. He’s got a fuckass snake on his calf and it looks SO bad and he knows it but refuses to admit it

-Chipped a tooth once when he lost a fight to Tim Shepard and it’s not SUPER obvious but he whistles a bit when he makes an ‘s’ sound if he’s not paying attention and he hates it

-Often ties his hair back in a ponytail because he doesn’t like the feel of grease in his hair

-He, Ponyboy, and Johnny all tried to outsmoke each other once. Dally lost to both of them, and Pony ‘won’ overall but at what cost? (He got real nic sick and Darry was FURIOUS)

[starreo]

thank god for you,

satoru.

cw: eventual smut, fear of dying without having lived. thank you my sweetest ever, @n-agiz for beta reading this :( big kissi

if it wasn't for you, i'd probably still be feeling empty inside. if it wasn't for you, i'd probably never have known that you could have fun in so many ways. if it wasn't for you, i'd have lived such a boring life. which is why, i thank god for you.

each time i get snapchat notifications with the multiple memories we made in those few months, i think of you.

live fast, die young was a concept, completely foreign to me. raised by slightly strict parents, i'd shaped into an adult who would never take unnecessary risks. always playing it safe, never doing something without thinking twice.

until i met you on that train ride to my uncle's place in the city. i wasn't expecting you to talk to me, and i wasn't expecting myself to talk to you. yet, we spoke for hours, laughing and slightly shoving each other, going as far as to exchange numbers so that we could get in contact sometime. i only realized just how much i enjoyed my normally boring trip to uncle's house. for the first time, i didn't think twice, sending you a message almost as soon as i got into bed. and you replied almost instantly too.

i smiled at your message asking if you could call instead. and there began the journey of me learning to live my life.

every day was a different event. we'd go up to the hills, snowboarding from down there, you'd tightly adjust the helmet on my head, telling me it's good to try out new things, after all, we get just one life. your bright blue eyes made mine shine for the first time. a rapid beating in my heart, still not sure whether it was from the adrenaline of the sport or the feelings i harbored for you in that short time. regardless, they made me feel so excited.

we'd grab quick lunches, a bagel or a croissant, takeaway stuff, because you would always say, life is too short to be sitting in a fancy restaurant, and not being able to enjoy truly. we'd bite into our food, you'd keep blabbering, always biting your tongue and then crying about it.

and i'd kiss you, for the first time, touching another's lips. looking up into your eyes, better now? and you'd nod hurriedly, making me giggle as you smashed your lips against mine.

we'd go fishing in a boat, a can of worms near your feet as you laughed at my terrified reaction. you'd show me how to wrap the worms around the hook, and wait patiently till the string started to vibrate. as i held the rod, you'd stand behind me, whispering in my ear like the fish could hear us, take your time with it, but don't miss it. when you said that, i thought you weren't just talking about fishing. all your words seemed so casual on the surface, however, when thought about, they'd be so deep.

we'd take showers in your house from falling into the water after you got startled by a worm crawling on your hand and turned the boat over. you would apologize profusely, feeling regretful, and i'd tell you, life's too short for regrets, isn't it, satoru? and your eyes would widen, the sparkle coming back into them as you'd wrap your arms around me, engulfing me in a tight hug.

i'd laugh at you and push you away, but you wouldn't budge, causing me to look up, into your eyes. your beautiful, beautiful blue eyes. bluer than the sky, bluer than the water, bluer than my life before i saw them, and yet with so much life. you'd lean down to kiss me. not like the first time we did. you'd be more gentle. your arms would slip behind my knees, smoothly picking me up from outside the bathroom and placing me on your bed.

you're right, y/n...life's too short for regrets. you'd whisper against my lips, your eyebrows furrowing just like mine, not being able to process the overwhelming emotions. you'd kiss me deeply, like you meant it, like you loved it, like you didn't wanna miss it.

your left hand traveling down to my thighs, grabbing and pinching the flesh, while the other hovered around the heat forming in my underwear. you'd look into my soul, gulping down the saliva in your mouth as you cocked an eyebrow. i'd nod and smile at you, leaning back against your headboard as you leaned closer to me, connecting your lips with mine again. but it was...more wet. more passionate. more lively.

each time i get snapchat notifications with the multiple memories we made in those few months, i think of you and i smile uncontrollably.

© starreo 2024. do not copy, translate or repost .

[eddiemunson-fanfic]

Hey girl hey

I was wondering if I could request a fic idea that's been on my brain for a while?

Either reader and eddie are arguing over something just stupid but eddie just won't let it go and reader just flashes him her boobs to stop the argument and it works lol.

Or

Modern AU where Eddie's at work and reader sends him a naughty snapchat/text to tease him and his brain kinda short circuits and he leave work early 😏

hey giirl! ofcourse you can always make a request, and sorry it took me some time to get back to you! but I tried my best, and hope you like it :') (and i loved both of them, but this will only include the first request, maybe I'll make another one for the second request :'))

Winning the argument.

Eddie Munson x Plus Size!FM!Reader

Warnings: TW (considering the argument), flashing, cursing, nipple play, sort of dom!Eddie, edging denial(?), choking.

Summary: you knew it annoyed Eddie, but you never thought of it as a big deal, but that was until you always ended up in a disagreement with him considering it. You knew he was only looking out for you, but you knew how to make him relax once he was riled up over it.

"God damn it woman, listen to me!" Eddie huffed as he pulled at his own hair, clearly frustrated with you.

"I am listening, I swear!"

"You know I get worried when you never tell me where you're going, and when you disappear for 24 hours without a single heads up? What the fuck do you think I would be doing? Not worry?!" he was getting more and more agitated by the second, and you flinched slightly when his voice got a bit louder than usual.

He was pacing back and forth, struggling to find the words to describe what he was feeling at that moment.

"Can you please just stop being so dramatic?" you huffed, which made Eddie stop dead in his tracks, glaring at you as he did.

"Oh, dramatic?! Dramatic?!" he practically screamed into your face, his hot breath hitting your face by how hard he was talking, making you jump just slightly.

"Excuse me for wanting to know and make sure that my god damn girlfriend which I love deeply is safe! I'm so fucking sorry!" he spat at you, rolling his eyes as he got more and more annoyed, pulling and struggling to fish out his pack of cigarettes from his pocket as he cursed under his breath for struggling to reach it.

"For gods sake! Fuck!" he growled, finally getting the pack out of his pocket and lighting a cigarette as he inhaled and exhaled hard, trying to calm himself down.

You knew you needed to do something to make him relax, and you knew just what to do.

"Babe" you spoke softly.

"What?!" he barked at you, choking on his own spit as he looked at you, his mind going completely blank as you had thrown your shirt up, flashing him your tits.

"Fuck" he practically moaned under his breath, licking his lips hungrily as he focused on your tits as you walked closer to him, his eyes fixated on them as you were almost flush against him.

"I'm sorry baby, I really am" you tried softly, walking closer to him as he stood by the door to his trailer. You took his face in your hands, leaning your forehead against his as his breath fanned over your face.

"I am really sorry"

His arms wrapped around you softly as he struggled to catch his breath.

"I hate when you do that" he chuckled softly, shaking his head softly as he did.

"What? Show you my boobs?" you tried to act as innocent as you possibly could, as one of his hands came up to cup your boob, a huge grin on his face as he licked his lips once more.

"Mhm" he moaned, struggling to breathe steady as he squeezed your boob softly.

"Fuck, I love them so much" he said as he stepped a bit away from you to get a better view of your tits as you got rid of your shirt completely, giving yourself a mental high five as it has worked once more.

"They love you too, baby" you cooed, watching him fall to his knees in front of you as he burried his face in between your boobs, inhaling the scent of you as he placed soft kisses to each before wrapping his arms around you, placing his face between them again, a huge grin across his face as he did.

You let him sit there on his knees for as long as he needed to. You didn't really mind having him like this on his knees in front of you as you played with his hair.

"I love you so so much" he mumbled against your skin as he wrapped his arms tighter around you, making you chuckle at him.

"I love you too, dummy" you giggled, leaning down to place a soft kiss to the top of his head before he lifted his head just slightly to look at you.

"I'm sorry I overreacted"

You felt bad for him straight away, you always did. You knew he just wanted to make sure you were okay, and when he didn't hear from you for over 24 hours, which was mostly the case when you ended up arguing like this, you wished for nothing but to teach yourself that you for once in your god damn life was able to pick up the god damn phone and give him a heads up. You were always talking together when you weren't gonna hang out for several hours on the phone, and even if it didn't happen often that you didn't hang out or were hours on end with eachother on the phone, you still felt bad you didn't take time to just give him a little heads up that you were doing okay and he didn't have to worry.

"Baby, don't apologise, please, it's okay"

"Ofcourse it's not okay that I shout at you baby, and don't you ever think it is!" he said a bit shocked, looking up at you between his lashes, his beautiful brown eyes melting you to the damn core.

"I won't, sorry!" you said, giving him a soft smile, noticing how he relaxed in your embrace as you kept on playing with his hair, something you knew he loved.

"But these" he smiled mischievously as he cupped both your tits, bouncing them in his hands for a bit before he wrapped his lips around your nipple as he played with the other, earning a soft moan from you as you pulled at his hair, your eyes rolling back.

"Fuck" you whimpered, loving the feeling of his tongue circling around your nipple, the gentle bites and the feeling of his lips around it as he sucked harshly before letting go of the nipple with a pop to focus on the other, giving the exact same attention to it as he did with the first.

"Babe" you moaned, pulling at his hair, earning a moan from him in response, as he bit down on your nipple softly, sending a pleasurable sensation through your entire body.

"Mhm" he moaned in response, batting his eyelashes at you as he continued his delicious torture with your nipples. Pinching the one he didn't have in his mouth between his fingers, circling soft circles around it, making your knees weak from his torture.

"Eddie, please"

He just chuckled in response, letting go of your nipple with a pop as he looked up at you with a huge grin, batting his lashes at you as he tried to act as innocent as he possibly could, still torturing your nipples by pinching them between his fingers.

"What, princess? Too much?"

He knew exactly what he was doing. He knew how sensitive your nipples were. You couldn't answer him, but just whimpered and gasped as he pinched your nipples and rolled them around between his fingers.

"I can see you're getting needy baby" he cooed, smirking at you as he watched how you tried to rub your legs together to create some sort of friction.

"But I didn't allow you to do anything about it, did I now?" he smirked, making you whimper as the grin he had over his face grew.

"Answer me" he demanded as he flicked your nipples, making you hiss slightly in pain.

"No"

"No, what?" he smirked.

"No, master"

His eyes rolled back as he bit down on his lip, getting aroused more by the second, especially by the nickname you called him.

"There she is" he cooed, as he stood face to face with you again, pushing you softly against the wall, a hand wrapping around your neck softly, your eyes rolling back in pleasure as he placed his knee between your leg, rubbing against your clothed core.

"You do as your told, isn't that right?"

You whimpered in response, but he didn't let it slide, squeezing your neck a bit tighter, making you moan, his knee pushing a bit harder against your clothed pussy.

"You're already soaked baby" he cooed, his eyes sparkling in the light, and you could see the lust grow in his eyes.

"Fuck Eddie"

Another squeeze to your neck.

"That's not my name honey"

"Sorry master" you whimpered.

He placed a soft kiss to your lips, biting down on your lower lip, making you moan in response before he let go of you completely, making you huff in annoyance.

"I have to get back to you after band practice, but don't do anything until I get back, or else" he warned, making you nod, but wanting nothing more but to pull him against you again, devouring him completely.

He pecked your lips once more before opening the door and winking at you.

"Love you"

Taglist: @eddiemunsonfuxks, @jadeylovesmarvelxo, @anaisweird, @marsmunson86, @eddiethesexy, @readsalot73, @warmaidensrevenge, @sherrylyn628, @sammararaven, @sllooney, @salenorona23, @screaming-blue-bagel, @sheenastark22, @lil-quinnie, @erinsingalong, @emsgoodthinkin

[sturniolosangel]

escapism-matt sturniolo (18+)

masterlist

warnings: drinking, cursing, kissing, break up, partying, drugs, use of pet names, choking, creampie, unprotected sex (please wrap it before u tap it), oral(f receiving), confession?, little bit of soft dom matt not proofread like always🙉

summary: reader gets broken up with, after a little drinking she ends up at matt’s door. will he give in to her thoughts?

i wake up with tear stained cheeks and my hair all messed up. i get out of bed looking at myself in the mirror. god i look a mess over some guy. i sigh as i get up texting my friends we’re doing out tonight and they all agreed.

as i got into the shower i was just thinking was i upset that he broke up with me or that i wouldn’t have a boyfriend anymore? i laughed as i got out. i was still hurt but it is what it is. i needed to get forget about him and move on.

as i got ready i put on my favorite black dress that my ex would never let me wear. felt so good to do whatever i want and god did i look good. it was strapless so my boobs were pushed up and my figure looked amazing.

i sat down at my vanity putting on my makeup and doing my hair. i just have forgot how much of a bad bitch i was because damn i look good. i facetimed one of my best friend nala telling her i was ready to go and ill be on my way to her house.

as i hopped in my car connecting my phone to aux playing the hills by the weekend turning the radio up. i got to my friends house getting out the car an walking in i didn’t need to knock. she gave me a hug “girl im sorry his ass broke up with you he was an asshole anyway. moving on to bigger and better things” she spoke.

“and i hope bigger dicks too” i replied giggling. “you ready to go!” she said excitedly. i nodded as she ordered the uber. as the uber arrived she locked her door and we walked outside into the uber. “everyone should already be on there way” i said looking up from my phone. she nodding sliding some pill on her tongue i’ve never seen before. i shook my head smiling at her knowing she was in for a ride tonight.

about an hour later im a couple shots deep since my group of friends kept ordering them an who was i to say no. my body was now almost numb but in a good way, a freeing way.

on the dance floor me and nalas bodies pressed together as we danced to music in the background. nala grabbed my phone from my pocket going to snapchat and recording me bending down and twerking on her. she posted it to my story giggling giving me my phone back.

i giggle back singing along to whatever song was playing as i walked to the bar. i got another drink sitting on a stool scrolling through instagram when a certain someone’s post came up. matt sturniolo a guy i used to flirt and hook up with before i got a boyfriend and man did he look extra fucking fine.

all of a sudden i got hot and sweaty as a wet patch grew in between my thighs thinking about our past experiences. i started to get needy for something i didn’t even know. i needed to go see him. he wouldn’t even be shocked if i pulled up to his house because we used to always show up out of nowhere just to fuck. god was i really this drunk?

i called nala over to me and said i was gonna leave and she gave me a hug goodbye before sliding a bag of pills and a condom into my purse i laughed at her as she walked back to our friends.

matt…

matt?

matt.

was all that rung through my head. i hoped into my uber debating it i should take the pills but then i realized girl wtf no. it was hard to not move around to create friction being drunk and horny.

the uber parked right outside his apartment i opened the door as i grabbed my bag and walked to the door. i knocked on the door hope his brothers weren’t home. the boy i’ve been needy for half the night answers the door.

“princess what are you doing here?” matt spoke rubbing his eyes. i could melt just from his words. “i just came from the club and i need you matty” i said quietly. he nodded as he moved out the doorway so i could walk in. he shut the door turning me around to face him.

“need me to help you baby” he softly said. i nodded my head as i whined. “come on mattys here to help” he whispered as he took me to his room. he shut the door behind him locking it.

as he stepped closer to me he wrapped he’s hand around my throat connecting our lips. i walked back letting myself fall onto his mattress not breaking the kiss. his arms were on the sides of me keeping himself up. his lips found my neck lightly sucking as i moan feeling super sensitive from the alcohol.

“gonna make you feel good” matt spoke as he reached his hands to the bottom of my dress lifting it over my head. he groaned as my body was on display infront of him realizing i only had underwear on.

his fingers touched my folds through my underwear “already wet baby, you been thinking about me doing this?” he questioned. “fuck.. yes matt been needing you to touch me all night” i answered.

he slide my panties down my leg as i lifted my hips up to help him. “been missing this pussy so bad. too bad your shitty boyfriend had to take it from me” he spoke rubbing my clit in circles i moaned out at his actions. “i’m not with him anymore matt.. he broke up with me” i struggled to get out.

“im sorry princess i don’t know why he would ever part from this pussy” he said dipping his head down connecting his month to my pussy. i slide my hand to his head lightly gripping his hair. he moans against me send vibrations threw me.

i rock my hips against his face as a euphoric feeling rising in my stomach. he pushes my torso down so i’m stuck in place as he just devours me. “fuck.. matt keep going” i moan out back arching against the bed.

his hand reached reached up to grab my boobs kneading them. the overstimulation of my body sent the pit of my stomach out on to his tongue. he pulled away licking his lips. “best pussy i’ve ever tasted” i smiled as i pulled him back up kissing his now swollen lips.

i reached my hands underneath his shirt pulling it above his head taking him in. “god am i drunk or did you get finer?” i question giggling. he laughed shaking his head reaching down to take his pants off.

it felt like he was taking ages to get undressed so u spoke up. “matt please..” he aligned himself infront of me. “please what princess?” he gently spoke. “i don’t want to feel how i did last night so matt just take this pain away!” i raised my voice slighty at him.

“ill give you what you want but dont raise your voice at me. every. again.” he stated wrapping his hand around my throat before pushing himself into me. only response i had was a pornagrapic moan coming out my mouth.

“such a good fucking girl” he said as i clenched around him. my hands find his neck bringing him close to my face sharing breaths. his thumb slid onto my bottom lip as i open my mouth and let his finger slip into my lips on my light sucking his finger and swirling my tongue around it.

he groaned as he kept his finger into my mouth holding my jaw bucking his hips deeper into me. my moan vibrating his thumb that rested on my tongue. his mouth taking the place where his thumb once was. “fuck matt give me it all.. please” i said digging my nails into his skin.

he obeys putting all of his dick in me i whine out from his actions. “you got it. take it like a good girl.” he spoke throwing his head back. “fuck.. fuck.. matt!” before i could say anything pleasure rushed over me as i dragged my nails down matt’s back.

he moaned against my neck thrusting into me gripping my hips. “i’m almost there baby doing so well for me.” he whispered as i whined from being overstimulated. a few more thrust and a warm liquid was now filling me up. his moans were being covered by my neck, i reached up to rub his face as he came down from his high.

“can we just stay like this for now?” i spoke softly. “anything you want baby” he whispered back. “one thing i will let you know is that im never letting you or this pussy go ever.” he said wrapping my legs around him as he reposition us. i smiled as i cuddle into him getting sleepy.

if you want to be tagged lmk!

tags: @lustfulslxt @oversturn @ilovemattsturn @oliviasturniolo21 @wh0szjoanna @flowerxbunnie

a/n: so sorry if i forgot to tag people some of my posts i can’t see comments but i hoped you enjoyed! also sorry it took me forever i am school and im still in the process of unpacking but two new smuts will be out soon. as always i🤍u

[gadriezmannsgirl]

Omg heyyy😭😭 i dont know if you still do requests, but could you write about gavi comforting his gf while shes on her period?? 🙏😭

Me being on my period rn😭☠️ feeling everything and being super sensitive😭😭

P.S I need a Pablo Gavi now💖😭

Period Problems -P.G

Summary: You're on your period and your boyfriend, Pablo is there to help you feel better

In your year of relationship, Pablo has seen you in and with everything, he loved every single little thing you did, said or wore. He always makes sure to remind you he didn't minded anything that happened to you that he would be there with you by your side always, that you didn't needed to change your clothes, put on some makeup, be careful with what you were thinking, no... Because you are his girlfriend and he knows he must take care of and support his girl unconditionally and no matter what.

And that leds us to where we are now, he also knows how hard some periods can be for you and how bad you take them. He even installed on his phone the menstrual calendar app and often asks how are you with it, if you need anything and overall being protective and careful with and to you.

But lately he has been very busy with trainings, travelling, playing and doing interviews, that much that he only checks his phone to message you, his family and the guys but overall nothing else. No Instagram, no Tiktok, no Facebook, no Snapchat, nothing. That included the menstrual calendar app.

What he never thought was coming home from a recovery training and see you in a weird position on the couch, with your ass up, knees up to your stomach and head down, your hands supporting almost whole of your body.

"Amor" He called with a light smile on and his eyebrows furrowed "What are you doing? Getting ready for tonight? I'm a bit tired but nothing to worry about too much, I can go a few-"

"I'm not doing this for fun, Pablito" You said still in the position "Everything's hurting, I have tried every single position that exists and nothing is making the pain go away but this one... Sorry to ruin your expectatives but that won't happen today"

"Pain? Is everything-?" You cut him off

"Could you bring me some water, lindo? Please? I really want to move but I can't stand it" You hissed and Pablo without saying anything else, he went to the kitchen to fill a glass of water for you.

He was confused... You in pain? What had happened during the day? And most important, why didn't you called him? Did you get hurt while cleaning up? Did you fell? His questions were interrupted by the ding of his phone notifications.

He pulled it out from his pocket and saw the reminder of THE app, his eyebrows went up realizing. You had your period.

Now, everything made sense...

He grabbed your favorite snack, prepared a bit of tea and while he waited for the water to start boiling, he headed up to where you were laid on the couch.

"Here, mi niña linda" He said softly caressing your back instantly gaining a moan from you

"You're warm" You pointed out as he smiled softly

"I know, bonita. Come on" He said laying next to you and pushing you out of that position.

Your back pressed onto his front as his hands went to your lower belly. You moaned once more this time in relief.

"Better?" He asked as you nod

"Feels nice"

"It does" He handed you the pack of tostones as you immediately opened it. He pressed a kiss against the sides of your head, before standing up. You groaned "I heated up some water for you, for the compress and I also did a bit of tea, it should be done by now" He explained "I bring those and keep on babying my baby" He kissed your cheek several times as you finally smiled

He went to the kitchen as you hissed once more feeling how it flew down, you groaned, standing up and going to the bathroom to change, meanwhile Pablo after a few minutes came back with the tea in your favorite mug, the heating pad in hand and another pack of tostones when he noticed you weren't there.

He was going to call you but the sound of the chain being pulled down in your bathroom was enough for him to calm and settle everything for whenever you are done with it.

When he saw you walk towards him with one of his shirts on, black shorts and a pair of mismatched socks, he fell in love with you once more taking in your whole beauty.

"Hola" He said

"Hola" You replied getting comfortable in his hold "How was recovery today?" He pulled the heating pad in your lower belly, exactly where you needed it as if he knew where the pain was and he passed you the tea, the opened tostón package and the unopened one, his hands going around your body.

"It was great, I tried to play as goalkeeper today"

"How did that went?"

"Pretty good, I think. I stopped several shots from the guys, almost broke my waist while falling to grab the ball. Ter Stegen is not appreciated enough" You laughed a little "The amount of times that man meets the floor is unbelievable"

"We love Ter Stegen" You said gaining a laugh from Gavi, you felt his hands going underneath your shirt, meeting your skin.

"How was your day?" You sighed

"Full of blood, cramps and pain"

"Why didn't you called me? I would have asked Xavi to let me leave earlier and be here with you"

"It's your job, amorcito"

"But you're my girlfriend, amorcita" You laughed "Next time you're telling me"

"How did you realized?"

"The app reminder, I forgot the date it was today. Didn't even remembered it, sorry"

"Don't be"

"I have been so busy lately" He groaned "Thank god, Xavi gave us a week off"

"What are we going to do?"

"I was thinking visit Sevilla, my parents and sister; last time we visited yours" You smile nodding

"That sounds amazing" You said playing with his arms "What else?"

"Right now? We can watch a movie, keep talking, cuddling, playing COD" You smiled "Whatever you want to do, we'll do it"

"All of that sounds amazing but can we keep it like this?" You mention the cuddling

"Of course we will" He said inmediately "Who told you I was separating from you? Gonna fight them. Cuddles with my girl are the best and being domestic with her even better, so you better get the idea of not getting up from this couch except for going to our bedroom, amor. We'll kick those cramps away with my loving"

°°° °°° °°° °°°

Taglist: @gaviypedrisbride @stuckinaf4nfiction @elijahslover @azzpenswrld

[winterchimez]

Lip Sync | Ji Changmin

pairing: ex Changmin x f!reader

genre: angst, suggestive

warnings: influence of alcohol, making out scenes, mentions of s*x, bad breakup, cheating, unrequited love (in some way)

word count: 2,751

a/n: so.... i can explain 🤡 what made me wrote this oneshot on a whim was because of Changmin's whisper from the song itself 🫠 (delusional to the max tbh 🙃) but in all honesty this is my favourite track from their latest jp album, and i knew i had to write a fic about it!! i just hope i managed to execute it well according to the lyrics (yall i tried my best ><) feedback would be much appreciated! 🩵

You watched as the clock continued to tick as it reached closer to the hour you were going to be done with this dreaded lecture you were having. 

3… 2… and finally… 1. 

The clock strikes 14:00, and everyone seemingly grabbed the belongings that they had obviously packed way beforehand and rushed out of the lecture hall. You, on the other hand, were in no rush to head to your next destination, which was your accommodations.

As you took your time packing away your things into your backpack, your phone lights up and produces a ding sound, indicating that you have received a notification. You immediately took up your phone that was lying front screen down on the table, and read the notification mentally. 

Hey Y/N, remember this time during 2022? 

Snapchat. Always with the monthly notifications that you’ve never bothered clicking into to see what it was because your college life was never entertaining in the slightest bit. You were a lone girl, and you’ve always preferred staying in the university’s library till late at night and then heading back to the comforts of your accommodations. You were never an outgoing person, so attending social parties was definitely out of the question.

However, for some reason, your brain decides to do the opposite today, as you clicked on the notification, with the thought of just having a quick glance at whatever Snapchat wanted to remind you about. 

Now, you wished you could’ve turned back time and that you’d never clicked into the application in the first place. 

A picture appeared on the exact same date from a year ago, depicting you with your former boyfriend, Ji Changmin.

Honestly, the Y/N from your freshmen year would’ve laughed if she had known that you and the f*ckboy of your university were actually a thing for a good solid 2 years. Ji Changmin was infamous, to say the least. Not only was he a good dancer that has basically contributed to winning several trophies from various dance competitions that were held annually throughout the state, but he was also the face of the university. 

Many students and lecturers admired the way he was. The manner in which he presented himself, those doe-like eyes and how he’s able to put on this adorable yet captivating look that just makes everyone swoon over him? He was a winner for sure. 

Everyone could’ve sworn he was definitely up for the job to take on the role of the president of the student council, given the good grades that he has worked so hard to maintain throughout the years. But the lad always turned the offer down, saying how there were better students up for the role, especially his close bud Kevin or Sangyeon. 

In reality though, what really stood out the most among the students was that he was the infamous f*ckboy in university. Oh, how many girls have given up anything to be able to spend a day with him, or even doing the deed with the man himself. 

You have seen how he was always with another girl almost every other day, and being the goody two shoes that you were, you decided that he was someone you’d rather jump off a cliff than associate with.

That was until a frat party that happened 2 years ago when your assignment mate at the time, Eric, was basically dragging everyone he knew to come to join him. And of course, he had to bring his newly met friend along too because according to him, the more the merrier. 

You came up with so many excuses that night, saying how you were sick or how you had way too many assignments due the next day. But that did not stop the male from actually showing up at your doorstep and basically dragging you into his car, not even letting you have a say in all of this.

So there you were, at your first frat party which you obviously did not enjoy the slightest bit. So many times you’ve tried to avoid everyone like the plague, retreating to the kitchen most of the time to be alone while having the least intoxicating drink you could possibly find. 

Of course, your demeanour that day stood out entirely from everyone else, and that has piqued the interest of the f*ckboy that was watching you ever since the moment you stepped into the party. He had his eyes on you the whole night, desperately waiting for the right moment to hit on you. 

Ji Changmin definitely had to thank the hosts of the party for organizing the infamous beer pong game, for that was when both of you truly came face-to-face with one another. During that time, all of you were split into two different teams, playing the game against each other to see who would win. He was the representative of his team, while you and Eric were the ones for yours.

Apparently, turns out that Eric wasn’t the best at holding his liquor, and he passed out after having 5 shots. Naturally, you had to take on the responsibility of continuing the game. 

You wished so badly that you’d said no that time, for you became tipsy, unknowingly chugging down more than 10 shots for basically losing against Changmin’s team that night. 

As the game ended and everyone was basically minding their own business throughout the apartment, you quickly excused yourself to the bathrooms and tried to calm your spinning head down. 

And there was when Changmin took the chance of visiting you to see with his own eyes, how the girl that has caught his attention throughout the night has become. You were a mess, and that somehow turned the male on even more. 

“Please… I don’t want any trouble….” You whimper.

“Funny you say that because you’re clearly enjoying whatever I am doing to you right now.” 

Both of your arms were pinned up against the cold bathroom walls above your head, and somehow the male ended up leaving trails of kisses all around your neck, while he shoved his legs right in between yours. 

When his lips finally met yours, you seemed to have enjoyed it more than you thought. Perhaps it was the alcohol, but you for sure did not reject that idea and eventually, it turned out to be a steamy make-out session in the bathroom. 

Changmin has made out with multiple women before, yet somehow you just felt so different from the rest. The whole experience? The soft whimpers and moans you produced? Oh, he couldn’t tell you how much they sounded so sweet to his ears, and he craved for more. 

“I just can’t get enough of you.” 

As he began to untie the pretty white lace dress that you were wearing, he couldn’t help but stare at your collarbone as he drops your clothing right onto the ground. He licked his lips, and he couldn’t wait to dwell deeper into his fantasies. 

“People say that I tend to go wild and bite when I’m drunk. Don’t worry sweetheart I won’t do that, unless you’re into that sort of thing.” 

And that was how you ended up with a hickey and a bite mark on your collarbone for a good 2 to 3 weeks. You could only vaguely remember what happened back then, you were too intoxicated to tell from your own perspective. But the male surely did remember every single detail from that session, which was what made him turn his whole interest towards you.

God, he was persistent. He always made the effort to get close to you, while the only thing you wanted was to stay far away from him. But your efforts turned out to be an utter failure most of the time, for he would always be a step ahead of you. 

He somehow got your number and began following your social media accounts and leaving comments on almost all of your pictures, texting you almost every single day, up to sending your random snaps where the male just somehow always manages to get good photoshoot-worthy shots. Honestly, at that time you insisted on blocking the male for good until your assignment mate Eric convinces you otherwise.

“Give it a go, expanding your horizons is what you’re supposed to do in university.” 

You probably would’ve thought that Eric was insane, but later down the line, you realised that you were the one going insane instead. 

Eventually, Changmin decides to get close to you in person, where he’d leave you random post-it notes in your lockers every day and purposely bump into you whenever you both cross paths during lunchtime in the cafeteria. These actions that you once thought to be annoying and intrusive, were slowly turning into ones that you actually enjoyed. 

He was goofy and flirty at the same time, which somehow always manages to put a smile on your emotionless face that clearly indicated how exhausted you were from all the lectures you were dealing with on a daily basis. Eventually, you began to enjoy his company, so when he offered to take you out on your first date, how could you possibly say no? 

Both of you were head over heels for one another, and eventually, the university labelled you both as the new lovebirds of the season. It wasn’t until the 10th date (at least from what you could remember) that both of you finally decided that you both were to become official. 

Of course, it also ended up with having a heated make-out session after having a little too much to drink in his apartment. During that heated moment, Changmin finally took the first step of asking you to be his girlfriend. Being madly in love at that point, you had no reason to say no. 

Instead of giving him a direct answer, you immediately gave him a smile and pulled his face down to your lips till both of you were merely inches apart.

“Just shut up and kiss me already.” 

A bittersweet smile was plastered across your face as you decided to take a seat in your lecture hall. After that Snapchat notification, you unintentionally find yourself to be stalking his Instagram page that you once blocked. 

As you tapped into his icon, you began scrolling through his feed while tears started to form in your eyes. You looked through the dozens of pictures that he posted, and you couldn’t help but to reminisce back on the good old days. 

And that smile of his.  

That smile was something that you’ve grown to become unfamiliar with, it was a thing of the past anyways. 

What exactly happened that made you both parted ways? None of you really knew exactly. 

As both of you eventually reached your senior year, the number of struggles and burdens that you both had to bear was becoming more and more unbearable, which has led the both of you to spend less time together. 

Unfortunately, the struggles were too much to bear for Changmin, and he eventually returned back to his f*ckboy roots, going out and sleeping with a different girl every other day. He did not want you to bear his difficulties while you were already clearly struggling to make ends meet since you provide for yourself, hence he could only vent out his burdens with what he knew best. 

You, on the other hand, were heartbroken, to say the least when you found out that he was doing what he used to in the past before establishing a relationship with you. But eventually, you had to accept the hard truth. 

At the end of the day, f*ckboys will always be f*ckboys. 

As you were lost in your thoughts, your phone suddenly dings which was where you received a new notification, this time from Eric. 

Eric ⚾️: Hey, since finals are over care to join a frat party for tonight? 

Well, since you had nothing better to do and you were basically depressed all over again after reminiscing back on your ex, you immediately took up the offer, in hopes of going for the sake of taking things off your mind for a bit. 

Y/N: Sure, pick me up at 8pm. 

As you turned off your phone and the screen goes dark, you were met with the reflection of your poker face.

Everything is going to be alright. 

So here you were, back at a frat party. You haven’t been in one since the last where your first encounter with your ex happened 2 years ago. 

You just wanted to let things off your mind and basically used this as an excuse to forget about your ex.

Or rather, actually hoping that you’d bump into the male himself. Knowing him, he definitely would not miss out on such an occasion considering his position as the university’s f*ckboy. 

As you make your way around the apartment, sure enough, you found the male on one of the couches, with a random girl he has hooked up with for the night. 

It didn’t take long for the male to notice your presence, perhaps he could feel that a pair of burning eyes were basically directed towards him for some time now.

Not wanting to create a scene, you retreated back to the kitchen, trying your best to find any liquor you could get. Basically, it was kind of an excuse to keep yourself occupied. 

It didn’t take long for the male to present himself in the kitchen, now looking right into your eyes. It has been a good 6 months since you both unofficially ended things, and the tension in the air was awful. 

Not even asking about what both parties have been up to, Changmin immediately broke the tension off by posing a question that seemed a little too harsh for your liking. “We… have no feelings anymore, don’t we?” 

No Changmin. I still love you. After what you’ve done. But, why can’t I say it out loud? 

With the quietness that you returned to him, he slumped his shoulders in defeat and gave this painful smile that you wished you could’ve helped ease.

“Honestly Y/N, you’re too good for me really, for a f*ckboy like me. If there’s someone as similar as you out there, perhaps I could’ve made it work. I guess fate has its plans and you’re just not the right one for me.” 

Don’t say that. 

As the male walks up closer to you, he returns you with a hug, one that you knew that it meant to be the last farewell. 

“I’m so sorry, Y/N.” 

You returned the male with a hug, and you tried so hard to hold back the tears that were basically going to stream down your face full of makeup that you’d done rather beautifully for the night. 

“Don’t worry about me, Changmin. I can never thank you enough for all of the beautiful memories we have made for the past 2 years. Your happiness comes first after all. I’ll be okay.” 

As you both broke off the hug, he decides to give you a quick peck on the lips, and oh how you savoured that short-lived moment. 

If this is really the last kiss, then let me remember it fully, from the shape of your lips to the scent that you gave. 

“You deserve someone better, Y/N.” Changmin pulled away and turned his back as he made his way back into the crowd in the living room. 

Right when he was gone, the tears that you’ve tried so hard to hold back finally poured down onto your face, and you desperately tried your very best wiping them away with your bare fingers. 

I wanted for us to start all over again so badly. But my ultimate decision was to put up a brave face in front of you. 

As you were done wiping the tears away, you made your way towards the exit and decided to take a breather and stroll around the area before heading back to your accommodations on your own before it gets too dark to be dangerous loitering around alone. 

With a huff, you looked up into the dark sky and tried your best to put on a sincere smile. 

Let’s both give our next love with our future significant other a shot. And may we truly find the right person to spend our lives with.

a/n: i'm actually considering to write a oneshot based on Eyes On Me & Door as well, do let me know if any of you would be interested in reading them ><

masterlist

taglist: @deoboyznet @flwoie @hokupi (join my permanent taglist here!)

[bigdicktitties]

The Dead man and the Austrian

Your phone buzzed, jumping, you took the vibrating object out of your pocket and checked the notifications. It was from the group chat the boys had put you in. You, Soap, Ghost, Konig, price, and Alejandro decided to keep in touch, and thus made a group chat named "The boys". You giggled when you heard that idea. Mainly over the thought of those big burly men, using Snapchat.

     You opened it to see the usual flow of memes, and occasionally random phrases in German, that you learned long ago was Konig's way of throwing the most creative curses you had ever heard into the chat. You rolled your eyes at the chats. A bitmoji appeared at the bottom, it's masked face tilted up in thought. What was the point of creating a bitmoji, if they were just going to cover everything up? You didn't even bother with emoji's.

     Much like Ghost and Konig, you wore a mask, and you often took it to extremes with covering your face. You wore colored contacts to hide your own eye color. You remembered when you would switch the colors daily to fuck with Soap. You didn't want them to know your face at all, and they understood that, afterall, it wasn't abnormal, seeing as how half of the team had their faces covered.

     However, it wasn't like Ghost or Konig who covered it for safety reasons. Looking in the mirror, you knew once more why you wear that mask, that was more of a veil. Your shoulder length hair hung messily around you, dripping water onto your bare chest. Your bra laid next to you on the sink, and you didn't feel like putting it on. All you wore were your panties.

    Your phone buzzed again, Ghost's chat appeared on the screen, "Drinks tonight with the boys, you in Oni?"

     Ah, yes, that nickname. Price made the joke one time, 'I bet you're a demon in the sheets.'

    He was drunk one night and didn't know it was you. Not that you looked particularly masculine back then.You were shocked when a hand grabbed your ass, causing you to turn around and shout in Japanese at him. His eyes went wide when he saw the mask in your face, to them, you were a guy. The whole room erupted in laughter. They wanted to call you demon after that incident, but you told them if they did, they had to say it in Japanese. Not that you wanted to be remembered as Price's drunken mistake, but you had no choice. It had stuck before too long.  It was better than them calling you (L/n).

    You picked your phone up, wiping the condensation off the screen, and began to type. You let the click of the keyboard echo out through the bathroom, "Sure, let me get dressed, and I will meet you guys at the bar.We going maskless tonight?" You typed with a few emojis to show the joke.

    Konig's bitmoji, almost identical to Ghost's, popped up, "Sure, maybe we can make it a striptease if Ghost can get on the pole." Laughing emoji.

     "I will shove that pole up your ass."

     I laughed at that. They were like an old married couple most days. You stuck the toothbrush in your mouth and quickly began to type, trying to get a word in before you were cut off, "okay, ladies. I will be there in an hour."

       I sat the phone down and walked to my closet. I pulled out my binders and my mask. It looked a lot like Konig's, but it was mesh, so I could see through it. It also had an oriental design embroidered into it. You couldn't tell it by looking at my actual face, but my Japanese ancestry meant a lot to me. I carried a piece of my actual self everywhere, and right now it was on my mask.

    I looked at the fabric in my hand, and chunked it to the side. It didn't look as badass tonight, and  the airiness of the mesh would give off the flowery smell of my body wash. I dragged a box out filled with many masks, I bought over the years in case I ever had to change identities. I dug until my hand felt a smooth, plastic horn. I pulled it out from the bottom of the pile.

     My sister had bought me an Oni mask to hang on my wall as a gift, but the mask was fully functional, so I wore it tonight. I walked to the mirror, binding my hips and chest to my body before I put on black cargo pants and an anime hoodie. I dried my hair, letting it hang free this time. It didn't look too girly, so that was enough for me.

    I left, making sure that every trace of my woman hood was swept away under baggy clothes. I didn't feel like driving, and it was only a few blocks to the bar, so I decided to walk. I needed to break my shoes in anyways. The sun was starting to set behind the clouds, and night was beginning to fall over the city. Most people, especially women, would be scared, but after being in the military for four years, I was confident some dope head with a knife, would not be the end of me.

    I heard the group before I saw them. I shook my head, opening the door. They raised thier glasses, cheering when they saw me. Everyone except Ghost who just stared. His eyes burned through me, and for a moment I wondered if I forgot to bind all the way or something. I sat down beside him, his eyes following me the whole time, "You're looking at me like I got a dick hanging from my forehead."

     "I didn't know you had that much hair." He said, taking a sip of his drink.

     "Ha! Did I finally pull the wool over the eyes of the infamous Ghost?" I playfully elbowed him in the side.

     He rolled his eyes, and Konig sat down next ot me. I turned to him, 'dabbing him up'. "Hey Konig, what you up to?"

     He put his arms around my shoulder and pulled me close, pointing to some generic blonde chick at the end of the bar sipping on a grey goose martini. I cringed behind the mask, don't tell me Konig has a type. "Oni, you see that frau over there?"

     I could smell the liquor on his breath, It had taken me an hour and a half to get here, and he was already hammered, "The blonde one? No thanks." I put my hand up.

      "No, the Asian bartender. I tried taking to her, but she don't seem to really understand me, go hit her up for me. You speak Chinese don't you?"

He smiled, still pointing.

     You swatted his hand down, "First of all you drunkard, I'm Japanese, and she is Korean. Neither of us speak chinese. Secondly, she probably understands you, you're just too slammed to make a coherent sentence." I waved my hand in front of my face, "How many drinks have you had."

     "Same as Ghost."

    I pushed Konig back, "Okay, well Ghost probably drinks away his sorrows, and look at those sad puppy dog eyes, he has a lot of sorrows. You are the biggest lightweight i've seen. Go drink a glass of water."  I looked over to see Ghost glaring at me. I smiled shrugging my shoulders. "Don't take that personally."

    The night went on, and it was filled with more banter from the team. You tried your hardest to fit in, but the more sake you drank, the more out of place you felt. The room began to feel more hot to you, so before long, I had taken my hoodie off to reveal a thin, plain black, long sleeved shirt on. You had a couple cups of sake, and you were a bit buzzed, enjoying the atmosphere.

    To tease Price back for the years ago he harassed you in this same bar, you strolled over, sitting in his lap, and running your hand down his face. The other guys began to laugh. You never understood how very open, homosexual acts could make them laugh so hard, they choked on their own tongues, but you didn't care. This is what being a boy entailed. You had to be a complete dumbass.

    You got up, excusing yourself to the bathroom, praying it was empty. Thank god it was. You rushed to the stall next to the urinals, seeing as how it was the only one in order. I jerked my pants down, slamming my butt on the toilet. That sake ran through me quickly, and I was pissing like a racehorse. A sigh of relief left my lips when I finally let it out.

    The door swung open and a pair of boots stumbled in. You heard a burp, and realized Konig had stumbled in here. You finished up, and opened the stall door. Thank god, I had that mask on, because when I left the stall, Konig was standing there with his dick out. A blush spread across my face at the sight. Konig was hung like a fucking horse. He made no attempt to conceal the thing. He was uncircumcised, but that don't matter when his dick looks like it would split me in half.

    He caught me staring, "You look like you have never seen a dick before. Don't get gay all of a sudden."

     You rolled your eyes, "Please, like I would get turned on by a guy who wears a fucking trash bag over his head. You're probably ugly anyways."

       He put his dick back in his pants, zipping them, "Is that why you wear the mask? I bet your one ugly hosensheiße underneath that mask." He stumbled forward, pointing a finger.

     He tripped over his shoelace, falling into your arms. He was fucking heavy, and it was taking everything in my power to not drop his drunk ass, "Jesus, your fucking heavy."

    "Sorry, that's just my ~burp~ huge cock." He put his arms on either side of my body, and pushed himself up using me as a prop. He picked up my mask and held it out to me, "oh shit you dropped this."

     I didn't even know that I dropped it, and shock flooded through my body when I saw the red, chipped painting. I didn't put anything on under it to conceal my face, I felt no need to, boy was I wrong for that.

    Konig's face dropped before his eyes went wide. They looked like they would pop out of his skull and roll onto the ground. You flinched, putting your arms on the counter. Your face alone was so painfully feminine, that no matter how much you bound everything else, those long lashes, full cheeks, and plump lips gave it away. You looked up at him through your lashes, "You better not tell the others. Konig I swear to god, I will tell every one about the time you was smoking at my place and sold your feet pics for pocket money." You threatened.

    He held his hands out in front of him, "Okay, Okay, I won't, but it will take more than bribery to buy my silence."

    He moved closer to you, pressing his body against mine, "W-What do you have in mind?" I closed my eyes as I felt his breath snake down my neck.

    He began twirling a lock of my hair, "A Blowjob. Suck me off, and I might think about keeping your little secret."

    I pushed his body off me. He was drunk enough, that it didn't take all that much to shove him back. Konig is usually way more controlled than this, but the copious amounts of liquor in his system has him unraveling. "Just a blowjob? Nothing more?"

    He shook his head. I sighed, silently agreeing by getting on my knees and unbuckling his belt. It was nothing to suck some dick in order to guard my most precious secret. It's not like I haven't given head before. I lifted his shirt, seeing a trail of hair that went down his stomach. My mouth watered at the sight of ripped abs and the smell of his body made me want to bite him.

     I pulled the belt out of the buckle, and I unzipped his pants. I traced his v-line with the tip of my finger, a shiver ran down his spine. He growled under his mask. "du machst dich über mich lustig" (You tease me)

    You cocked your head, not understanding his german, but finding it sexy that he has reverted back to his most basic instinct. I finally got enough courage to pull down his boxers. It almost hit you in the face when it sprang up, freed from it's prison. I knew I couldn't take all of it at once, but I was still really excited to see what I could do. He had minimum hair, giving me a clear view of everything.

     You parted your full lips, looking ups at him through your eyelashes. He stared at you with intensity as he saw his own cock disappear behind that velvet face that you had. He put a hand lovingly on the side of your head, as you took what you could, stopping about half way. He shook his head, disapproving of your decision to stop, " I think you can take more, Bärchen." You shook your head, trying to look at him pleadingly, "Do you need my help?" He stroked down the side of your face, your caramel eyes, pleading for his mercy.

    He put both hands on either side of your head. You slammed your eyes, knowing what he was about to do. He chuckled, "Eyes on me, Hase. I will be gentle." He slammed his cock to the back of your throat. The precum lubricated it, allowing it to slip further down with ease. You gagged, feeling tears prick up in your eyes. He slipped out, allowing you air. "Take your clothes off, I want to see your body."

    "I thought this was just a blowjob? Why do I need to get naked?" You asked, hoping he hadn't changed his mind. it was one thing to give head, another to actually fuck.

    " I would come quicker if you were naked. Don't you want to get this over with sooner?" I nodded, taking off my shirt. I averted my eyes when he began to pump himself. "Look at me. I want to see those eyes."

     You gave a whimper of protest, but abliged anyways. The army had you so used to doing what you were told. Your bare body now lay on the wet bathroom counter. You slid off, getting back onto the floor, you took his cock into your tiny hands. Putting the weeping tip in your mouth, you swirled over the small slit that settled on top.

    He threw his head back, "Scheiße!" He howled. His whole body shuddered. You took his cock deeper into your mouth, adjusting slowly. Inch by inch you felt his thick cock slip past your throat and press against it's insides. You gagged, just so he could feel your throat tightening around him. He moaned, spewing german nonsense from his lips. He was so close, and you was ready for this to be over with.

    That was until the door swung open, and you saw Ghost walk in. He stopped, staring at you. Your cover had been blown again, and this time in the worst way imaginable: you in between Konig's legs, taking his dick like the whore you were. Ghost widened his eyes, seeing the scene, "Bloody hell Konig, where did you find a prostitue?"

     I pulled back, ready to fire off, saying how I wasn't a prostitute, but right as I began to slide off, Konig, slammed my head back down, "She isn't a prostitue, but she was desperate." He looked down to you. You could see the smirk in his eyes. That damn bastard.

    "How desperate? I came in here looking for you and Oni, but I guess you have been occupied...Wait!" His eyes went even wider as he realized the tiny woman that clutched Konig's thighs with mascara running down her face was the same guy that once killed forty men with a single knife. "You mean he was a girl this whole time?"

     I choked on his cock, causing a shiver to go down his spine. Konig noded. There was no use in hiding it, Ghost had already put two and two together. You pulled of his dick with a pop, "M'sorry for lying. There was no way 141 would take me seriously as an asian female. You all would have sexualized me for no reason!" you shot a spiteful glance to konig as he rubbed the back of his neck chuckling.

     Ghost stalked closer, "I see your point, but if you don't want repercussions, I suggest you give me a good reason not to turn you in." He looked stern. You could see the betrayal in his eyes. The person he shared so many personal thought and moments with turned out to be lying to hims about the biggest thing: who they really were.

    You put your hands up to beg, but Konig cut you off, "I think she needs to be punished." He said to Ghost, sarcasm and lust lacing his voice.

     "Your right Konig, and good news is you get to help me. Turn the bird's head my way." Konig put his big hands on the sides of your hand and turned you towards Ghost. He walked closer, tugging his pants from his waist, revealing his half hard cock. You widened your eyes, because where Konig had all the lenght for days, Ghost was girthy as fuck. Not to say he didn't have length, but it was no where near Konig.

    Konig directed your precum stained tongue to the twitching cock in front of you. 'You didn't know how to feel about taking your lieutenant down your  throat, but the thought of being kicked off the team sucked worse. You thought about the effects of your actions and how something as harmless as lying about your gender could get you dishonorably dishonorably discharged.

    Ghost pressed his tip against your lower lip, "Quite the dick sucking lips innit?"

    Konig, pressed his masked face to the crook of your neck, "You hear that schatzi? How do we thank the lieutenant for complimenting you?"

You wrapped your lips around his cock, hearing him groan. "Good girl, that's the spirit." Konig said, giving a light slap to your ass.

 

     You moaned, sending vibrations up Ghost's dick. He decided to take it upon himself and slowly inch his way down your throat. He could feel the walls of your cheek suckle him, trying to milk him of his cum. He reached your tight little throat, pushing his way past. You gagged around him, feeling tears prick in your eyes from gagging.

    The feeling of your throat flexing around his cock made him ache for your sweet sweet heaven between your legs. Konig kept his hands on your head, pulling your head back and forth onto Ghost's cock with a nice pace. Ghost had moved his hand to wrap slightly around your neck, relishing the sight of your throat bobbing with the thickness of his cock. "I wonder what's between this lassie's legs? Maybe we should take her home and try her out?"

    You shook your head in protest. Konig had promised this would only be a simple Blowjob, but Ghost hadn't. All he said was that he intended on punishing you. You gagged more on his thick cock, and when your lungs began to burn, you pulled back. A string of precum hung between your tongue and the red, weeping tip that was held in front of you. You looked up to Ghost with pleading eyes, "Please don't."

     "Why is that? Afraid we will break you?" He held her chin in his hand, stroking his dick right by her face.

    "Yes actually, please!" You begged, "Look, I've given head before, and I have even touched another guy. I've done just about everything but actual sex."

      Konig pulled your hair back to meet his eyes, "So we got ourselves something to break in huh? Don't worry Hase, we won't be too rough." He released your hair.

     "I'm a soldier dammit! Why are you doing this?" You crossed your arms.

     Ghost pried your mouth open, aiming the head of his cock at your pretty pink tongue, "You're quite dishy when your being disobedient. I might keep you personally." You could see the amusement in his eyes.

    You were too busy focusing on those dreamy brown eyes to see the ropes of cum splattering onto your face. You closed your eyes, opening your mouth. Both men gave a chuckle at your surprise.

    You felt their hands withdraw from your body, and you clutched yourself, covering up your bare body. Cum dripped down your face and onto your bare breast. Konig handed you a paper towel, "You might want to clean yourself up. We decided to take you back to your place and have some fun~" He smirked.

     Slowly you got off your feet and began to dress yourself. Your knees had prints in them from sitting on the tiled floor for so long. Your joints cracked and popped from the weight of you lifting yourself off the floor. You timidlycleaned yourself off and put your mask on.

     The boys walked you out, waving to the rest of 141, "I'm driving Konig and Oni home, they had too much to drink." Ghost said, grabbing his keys and heading out the door.

    You kept your head down, still ashamed of what was to come next. You never thought you would sleep with a superior, but here you were about to have a threesome with not just your Lieutenant, but a member of another team.   Where was your pride and dignity?

    Ghost clicked his keys, and the headlights of a truck began to light up across the parkinglot. The sleek, white finish had you a little jealous, but when you saw it had no backseats you looked at Ghost, "How will we all fit?"

    "The middle seat folds up, your small enough to sit there." He opened the door and helped you climb inside. You watched Konig climb in, ducking his head to fit his massive body into the truck. You locked eyes with him, and hurriedly turned away to look at Ghost.

     He was also trying to fit his massive body in the truck. When they finished settling in, you found yourself wedged between two giant men, and you found your mind wandering to dirty places. You wanted to be sandwiched between them while they filled your insides. You began to whimper to yourself.

     Konig reached over, taking your mask off, and grabbing your chin, "What's wrong little maus?"

    You blushed making eye contact with him, "Please." You begged, not really knowing what you wanted specifically, but knowing that you wanted something.

     Konig looked at you intensely, his gaze piercing you, making you whimper even more. You began to rub your legs together to do something about the burning that you created by having such sinful thoughts. His eyes followed your shaking figure all the way down to your crotch, watching your legs grind against each other. His eyes widened, "You want me to touch you maus?"

    You pouted, nodding. You didn't care that you looked pathetic right now, begging for a man to touch your pussy, you only cared about getting that feeling to go away.

     Konig unzipped your pants, sliding his hands down to your crotch. He stroked your slit through your cotton panties, hissing when he felt how wet you were. You clung to his arm, watching his hand move under the fabric of your pants. He pulled your panties aside, and began to slide his finger between your lips, spreading your wetness over your whole body. You threw your head back, moaning.

    Konig slipped a finger in you, relishing how tight your walls are. Your head snapped up, wide eyed as more choked moans fled your lips. Konig pumped his finger in and out of your slick cunt, feeling it suck his thick digits in with every thrust. It made obscene noises the whole drive.

     You felt another hand join. Looking over, you saw Ghost with one hand on the wheel, watching the road intently as his other hand found your clit. He stroked it in big circles, making sure you felt it everytime his finger dragged across each nerve. You could swear he had a smirk on his face as you threw you head back, feeling the overwhelming pleasure from being played with.

     You felt the car stop, looking up, you saw Ghost lean over, switching hands, he bagn to stroke your face, "That's a good little slut. Just sit there and feel good while we do all the work. Let the men do their jobs." He purred into your ear while your moans and hisses filled the truck.

    Konig leaned into your other ear, making sure you can feel his hot breath snake down your neck. He picked up his pace, adding another finger. You flexed your legs at the stretch, mewling over the two men simultaneously finger fucking your whining pussy. Konig purred in your ear, "So eine Kissenprinzessin. so eine hübsche kleine Schwanzhure." Such a pillow princess. Pretty little cock whore.

    Your eyes rolled in the back of your head as you felt your lower body grow hot. You arched your back as your orgasm hit you like a steam hammer. You opened your mouth only for strangled noises to escape. Your body felt like it was being pulled apart, and you loved it.

    Konig watched you ride out your orgasm with dark eyes. You could almost see the dark fantasies he had about you playing through his mind. If it felt better than this, then you would fulfill his darkest fantasy. You held eyes as he slipped his fingers from you and placed them in his mouth, licking them. He pulled them out with a pop, telling you how good you taste.

     Your legs were shaking. They felt like jelly. Ghost opened the door, offering you his hand. You took it, allowing him to pull you into his arms bridal style. You clung to his grey shirt, burying your head into his chest, enjoying his scent. He tossed Konig the keys, and he unlocked the door. You anticipated what was to come next. Would they carry you to the bedroom, or would they simply fuck you right here in the living room while you were sandwiched between them. 

     Ghost walked over to the couch, setting you down. Your legs shook, and you whined from the lack of contact. You reached down to your sopping cunt, trying to play with yourself in hopes of relieving some of the pressure in your body, but you had never done it manually. You made enough money to afford toys, so you never learned how to do it by hand. You looked down between your legs with a defeated look on your face. 

     You felt a presence behind you, and a hand snaked between your legs. You could smell the alcohol on his breath, " Does the lass not know how to touch herself? That much of a princess?" He sank his finger into your wetness, watching as you tilted your head back and rested it on your shoulder. Your mouth stretched open as did your pussy as Ghost slid two finger deep inside of you. "Good little bird. Come on sunshine, mewl for me." He continued to whisper in your ear as your legs clamped around his thick arms. You felt os small compared to him in so many ways. That turned you on, just imagining your tiny body being pulverized by these two giant men...wait no. You were a soldier, and you needed to act like one instead of throwing yourself onto people like this. If they were the enemy, you would already be dead. 

    Would death really be that bad if you got to feel every inch of an Austrian and a brit going in and out of you? You hoped it would ill you to be split in half over them. To be juiced like an orange on their dicks. Your mouth began to water at the thoughts of what they would do to your bodies if they had the chance to. You felt your legs being spread apart. You were snapped out of your daydream, seeing bright blue eyes resting beneath you. 

     Konig pulled your pants off, swatting away Ghost's hand while he spread your lips apart with his fingers. He took in the sight before him, " Heilige shieß, so klien und perfekt." (Holy shit so small and perfect.) He said, running a finger up your slit. You let out a cry of pleasure not caring about your dignity anymore. Konig began to kiss your thighs through his mask, trailing up your leg, stopping right before the thing you wanted him to kiss the most. He looked up at you, "Willst du, dass Daddy dich auswärts isst? bitte darum Prinzessin." (Do you want daddy to eat you out? Beg for it princess.)

     You didn't understand german that much, only what Konig had took the time for in the past, but you knew what he wanted. He wanted you beg. "Please Konig." You took a moment to mentally put together a sentence with what german you know, "Bitte Konig. Fick mich. Ich mich aus!" (Please Konig. Fuck me. Eat me out!) You screamed, just wanting contact from him. He was the one that got you into this mess, he might as well make it worth your while. 

     Konig's eyes perked up at your german. You saw the surprise fade into primal, animalistic lust. Part of you felt scared of the look on his face, but the other parts were begging him to eat you out with fervor. He lifted his mask up slightly, showing his pink lips. You caught a glimpse of him licking his lips before he rested the bottom of his hood on the crevice between your stomach and pussy. 

    He huffed on your clit, teasing you with his breath. You whimpered under his touch when you felt his tongue go down on your swollen clit. He worked in so many different patterns. He went in circles, and then he switched, going up and down. You felt like you would pass out from the feeling. It was too much to feel his wet muscle glide over your small clit. It felt like your ovaries would tie in a knot from this. Your holy body felt alive. 

    Ghost was beginning to feel jealous of all the attention Konig was giving you. He walked around the couch, sitting down beside you. He slid his pants off watching Konig go to town on you. He wanted to dip his tongue inside you just as much. He tapped Konig on the shoulder, "Oi, move to that side, and we will tag team her. Punish her real nice." You could see the smirk under his mask. 

    Konig moved over, focusing his tongue on one side of your clit while Ghost got on his knees and pulled his mask up. You felt his tongue next. It flew over your slick folds, and your hips bucked, pushing their faces deeper into your cunt. You wanted to take their masked faces and slam them into your pussy, rubbing their faces in it like dogs. They made this mess anyways, and their skilled tongues were next to make a mess. 

     Your body slid down into the couch, but perked up when they both slid a finger each into your tight hole. Your back arched, causing you to scream. They picked up their pace, aroused by your screams. You leaned forward, caressing their head, muttering in Japanese as they feasted upon your body. 

     The knot in your stomach was getting tighter, and you couldn't tell if it was from the extreme fingering or the cunnilingus. All you knew was that you was slowly inching closer to sweet release. You wanted it so bad, and much like them, face deep in your whining cunt, you could taste it. It was that close. Sparks began to form behind your eyelids like a lit firework, and as they took off you could feel that spike, that climb. You were ready for the mind numbing orgasm, but right as they were to explode, they stopped. 

    You opened your eyes, glaring at the two men. They pulled back. You saw ghost stick his finger in his mouth, pulling it out with a pop. His eyes rolled back at your rich flavor. Konig licked his lips, and swiped tow fingers up your cunt. He held the digits up to your mouth. You didn't need him to tell you as you leaned forward, wrapping your puffy lips around his soaked fingers. You bobbed your head up and down, making eye contact. Konig grabbed your chin with his other hand, "You just want me to fucking ruin that needy little whore hole of yours don't you?"

    You pulled off his fingers, "Please do. I want my tight little body to be abused tonight. Make me regret lying to you!" You cried, wanting them to get this show on the road. 

    Ghost grabbed you by the legs pulling you against him, "That's all you needed to say." He leaned close, lining his dick with your entrance. You could feel him breathing on your collar bone, sending shivers down your spine. His breaths formed words, "I'm going to make you my cumdumpster." He stated as he rammed his thick cock all the way into you. You screamed feeling the stretch happen so suddenly. He held your hips as you leaned back over the arm of the couch. The stretch was intense. You wee afraid to straighten your back, thinking that it would snap. 

    "Cup your tits together Schatzi." Konig spoke, stroking your sensitive nipples. You brought your hands up, pushing your boobs together. Konig took his precum soaked dick and slid it between your tits. His lubed up dick sliding through with ease. He put his hand on his back as he thrusted. He cupped her mouth forcing it open, "Open wide for me pretty." He slid his balls in your mouth as he tit fucked you. 

    You felt like their little slut. It made you smile a bit. The two most feared men on 141 and KorTac was making your their little fuck toy. You were positive that the socks they jerked off into as teenagers got more respect than you in this moment, and that was fine. You were in the army, it was nothing for you to get yelled at and degraded. Honestly its half the reason you joined: to hear men tell you how fucking pitiful you are. 

     You would be as pitiful as you needed to be for them. You hoped they fucked you out of pity. You hoped that everytime their thick, heavy balls slapped against your sopping pussy, they felt so sorry that they fucked you harder. 

    All your pride and dignity had flown out the window. 

     You felt Koing withdraw, "Ghost. Let me have a turn inside of her."

     "Alright, I was about to cum anyways." He pulled out, watching a string of juices follow. Koing walked around, eyeing his prey. His deep oceanic eyes, stalked you from your spot. You began to whimper as you watched him lurk around the couch, his hard cock being pumped by his equally as big fist. You were scared to have him inside of you, but you needed it so bad. 

     He grabbed your legs, pressing them together tightly. You placed your hand over your mouth, whimpering as you felt the tip probe your wet hole, and gradually it pushed it. You could feel the weight of him pressing against you from just the tip.  Your eyes rolled into the back of your head when you felt the stretch he supplied you with. Gods it was fucking beautiful.

     "Like a bitch in heat." You heard Ghost say, his caramel eyes, looking at you with predator intent.  He took you hair in his hands, almost petting you as he watched Konig disapear in you just to resurface again. Each time, drawing a moan from your lips in the most begging way. His string of broken German made you want to cry. You could'nt tell what he was saying, but you knew it was so dirty that even Satan would have to plug his ears to this.

     Ghost sat there, lightly tugging on your hair as your eyes rolled into the back of your head. Your mouth hung agape, and you didn't even try to stop the noises that left your lips. You felt Ghost tug your head back by your hair. You closed you eyes, when you felt his tip probe your cheek. You welcomed it. He slipped in, using the juice he picked up off you earlier to lube up his journey down your throat. Your body stiffened. You felt so full. You wanted to always feel like this.

     You felt so nice being used and abused by these two big men. You could do this all night, just having them fuck you like some sock they would toss behind their beds after a quick wank. The way their bodies pressed against you like a slutty little Chinese finger trap made you want to cream that very instant. It was so good and they were so heavy against your tiny body. 

      Ghost was slowly slipping his tip in and out of your throat, liking how your throat flexed around him as you gagged on it. The girth bringing  you to heaven. He dragged it in and out slowly, before deciding you were ready for the full effect of it. He put his hand on your throat and clamped down, tightening the already snug space in your throat. 

     You let out a moan and a gag as your body tensed up causing you to clamp around Konig. You could feel his thrust grow sloppier inside of you, and neither of them had a condom. You wondered if they would fill you or cum on you like some cheap whore. You didn't know which part had you more excited. 

     Konig leaned his body over you, and he began swirling his tongue over your nipples, feeling the roughness of the hard peaks on his tongue. You moaned with Ghost in your mouth. You loved being filled to your hearts content, and you wished it would never end, that they would fuck you like their little cum dumpster for the rest of their big, burly lives. 

     Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as another orgasm hit you like a freight train. Your body shook with fervor as you felt your heat pulse with ecstasy. Your small frame trembled under their grip as you opened your mouth letting out a scream. Ghost pulled out of you, holding you from under your arms. Konig drilled into you as you came all over his lengthy cock. 

     Ghost leaned in petting you, "Right there baby, right there. When you get done cumming like a good little slut, I'll go back in, and me and ol' konig here will tag team you." He planted kisses on your temple, felling your body shake with every wave of euphoria that washed over you. It felt like it would never end, but soon your trembles died down and you could breath again. 

     That was until you felt a tip probe your sopping whole from behind. You shook your head trying to say you wasn't ready, but he pushed past, stretching out your body so well. You were ruined now, and hoped that maybe this is a forever thing now, because no other man could ever want you after this. These two big men just ravaged your body and there was no turning back now. You were forever sealed to these men. 

     They pumped in and out rhythmically. When Konig pulled out, Ghost pushed in. You were never empty of them. Ghost held you from the back while you wrapped your legs around Konig, feeling as they tugged you back and forth like a saw on their dicks.  You let out so many screams and moans. Your throat felt dry and you just wanted some water, but the only thing that seemed wet at the moment was your cunt that was weeping onto the men holding you. 

      You felt like you were going to explode everywhere, all over their throbbing hard ons. You couldn't keep quiet and Konig had to clamp his hand over your mouth. You looked at him wide eyed as it turned you on so much to be dominated, deprived  like this. He leaned in closer where his blue eyes met yours, "Can you still breathe liebling?"

     You nodded not being able to breathe. He gave you a curt nod before resting his forehead on yours. You were starting to feel tired and wore out. You came all you could, yet again and again they rung orgasm after orgasm out of you. You felt dried up and used. You gripped the part of konigs mask on each side of his head while Ghost buried his face in the side of your neck, placing hickeys up and down the side as he drilled his hot cock into your tiny pussy. 

     Konig pulled his mask up to a little above the tip of his nose, and locked lips with you. He had tiny beads of sweat on his upper lip, and a stubble had begun to grow in. You could feel his long hair on your shoulders. You broke from the kiss to moan. You felt a firm hand slap your ass, and looked back to meet eyes with Ghost. "Keep going, I'm almost there. be a good girl and I will finish in you." You moaned at the thought " You like that? You like the thought of me filling you with my hot, wet cum? I bet you want it dripping out of you and onto my couch? I'd let you ruin my couch with your weeping cunt. I bet you feel honored." You shook your head violently. 

     Konig jerked your head around to meet him, "Enough of him hase. Look at me, I can fill you more. You want my Austrian babies? Oh I bet they will look cute with those lips of yours. I will take you back to Germany with me. C'mon. I bet you would rather have this huge cock ramming into you every night. That british asshole can't fuck you like I can."

     Ghost rolled his eyes, "I have more experience with women. I know what make you tick. What makes you cum," He reached around to rub your clit in circles. 

     Konig began palming your nipples, "You don't want a depressing guy like him. You can't get anywhere with him. He doesn't exist to the government, but me? We can live and go places."

     "Who do you want to cum inside baby, just tell us. We won't be mad. Whose babies do you want to have?" Ghost cooed into the nape of your neck.

     "B-both..." You stammered out cautiously. 

      

You felt a slap on your ass, "Good girl." Konig pulled you close, "Let us both cum in you and play baby roulette. I bet you will look so good swollen with my german babies." HE began to pump faster inside of you.  

     "Don't listen to him (y/n) think of my little brunette babies with their chocolate eyes and your high cheekbones, we would practically raise models." He breathed into your neck as he began to hammer your hole. 

     "Oh fuck~I'm cumming~ fuck!" You shouted as you felt your walls give and pump hot cum onto their balls. Your body went limp as you shook in their arms. You were ready to be filled with their babies. You wanted it so bad.

     They got closer, sandwiching you between them tightly. Their bullying cocks pumped so fast they were sweating and panting. Finally after enduring the feeling if being rammed into so tastily, you felt Ghost bite your neck as he emptied his balls deep in your womb.

     Konig was soon to follow with his string of german curses. As they both emptied their seed inside of you, the spilled, catching their breath. They pulled out of you, hearing you whimper from not being full as you were used to being for so long.

     They laid you down on the couch while Ghost petted your hair and Konig left to get something to clean up. "Shhh, its ok. Its over now. Just relax in my arms princess." He pouted as you shook from everything.

     Konig returned a moment later and began to wipe you down, throwing his shirt at you to put on. You started to get up, but he stopped you, "Dont stand liebling. We don't want anything to seep out. Where do you need to go, I can carry."

     Your voice came out small and hushed, "I want a bed to sleep in please. I'm so tired."

     Konig turned to Ghost. He pointed down the hall, "Put her in my room, she can sleep there tonight. You can sleep on the other side and we can stick her in the middle."

    Your brain was cumdrunk and you couldn't think straight. To think you were once feared by many just for you to lay there in a tshirt, rubbing your sleepy eyes, "cuddles?"

    He cupped both sides of your face, bringing your eyes to meet his, "Yes, luv, cuddles all night. We don't have anywhere to be tomorrow, so we can sleep in."

     You gave a sleepy smile as Konig wrapped his arms around you, carrying youback to the room where he laid you in the middle of the bed. " If he lets me I'll steal his kitchen to make us some breakfast." He kissed you on your forehead.

     You closed your eyes to drift off to sleep as you felt them climb into bed and wrap their arms around you as you allowed your body to finally rest. To think you fucked a dead guy and a German.

[axelsagewrites]

Jamie Tartt*Phone Call

Pairing: jamie x f!reader

Day three: phone sex with Jamie Tartt – even though he loved to play the long nights away from you were almost impossible to bare so he often found himself hitting call at late hours of the night

Word count: 1226

Warnings: phone sex, teasing, nude pics/sexting, dom/sub vibes, sex toys, vibrator, nipple play, smut 18+

Masterlist Here

Kinktober List Here

Jamie didn’t know how to handle this. You’d been sending him pictures all weekend. It was the first time you’d not been able to make an away game and Jamie didn’t know what was worse; not being able to touch you or the fact he knew with each snapchat notification you’d sent another, but he couldn’t check. Not yet at least however the moment the match was done, won by Jamies frustration and libido, he soon rushed to his hotel room.

“Whatca think you’re playing at luv?” he said as soon as you picked up on the second ring.

You giggled from the other end of the phone from where you sat in your shared bed which felt empty without him, “Whatever do you mean sweetheart?”

“Think being a tease is so funny huh?” he asked, his voice lower than usual as he collapsed into a chair and began going through the snaps, you’d sent him. Jamie groaned when he saw a pic of you in his jersey from behind, back arched, and ass proudly on display. It wasn’t long till his hand slipped beneath his shorts. “Not gonna be laughing when I get home are you,” he said, palming his boner through his boxers.

“Oh yeah?” you smirked, your bratiness evident even through the phone, “How not?”

“Not gonna be able to laugh when I’m fucking that pretty lil mouth of yours,” Jamie said, slowly jacking off through the boxers, “That’ll wipe the smirk off those pretty lips,” he said, his voice darkening as he slipped his hands under the final layer of fabric.

“Maybe I’d like that,” you teased, your hand slipping under the sheets unbeknownst to a very wound-up Jamie. Your fingers trailing up your wet slit before finding your clit, biting your lip lightly as you rubbed slow circles.

Jamie groaned, his head falling back as he desperately tried to keep his grip on the phone, “Bet you would as well. Shame you’re only all talk on the phone,” he said, and you knew it was true no matter how much you would deny it, “Don’t get all shy now princess,” Jamie said, slowing his speed so he didn’t blow already like a teenage boy. “You touching yourself?” he asked and imagining the way you’d be blushing right now.

“Maybe,” you stuttered out, your hand pausing as Jamies chuckled.

“Good girl,” Jamie said, his voice deep as he sped up his pace yet again, “Wish it was me touching you though. Why don’t you use that little present I got you last week?”

Even without him here you could feel your skin heat up. You quickly found the sleek pink vibe Jamie had got you as a going away present. For a moment your mind wandered, remembering how he had tested it out on you that night, “You still there love?” his voice snapped you from your thoughts.

“Um yeah was just looking. Found it,” you said as you started to turn it on.

“Uhuh,” Jamie chuckled, imagining how you looked right now and grinning when he heard it buzzing, “Now be a good girl and let me hear what it can do,” he said.

You shivered at his words but did as you were told. You whined when you trailed it up your pussy, almost whimpering when it grazed over your clit, “Fuck you sound so good,” Jamie said, his own hand speeding up, “Bet you look even fucking better,”

“Not as good as you,” you said, trying to sound seductive but the whimper only made Jamie laugh.

“Doubt that love,” he said thinking back to all the cute little outfits you had sent him, “Whatcha wearing?” he asked.

You glanced down at your choice of clothing and smiled lightly, “One of your jerseys,” you said, and you could hear him suck in his breath over the phone, “and nothing else,” you added, smirking slightly at the way he groaned.

“Fuck baby you’re killing me here,” Jamie moaned, feeling his cock get even harder if that was at all possible at this point, “Why don’t you turn that thing up yeah? You’re too quiet baby,” he said, his voice low. Without questioning you’d press the button, and a quiet moan left your lips, “Cmon baby,” he said, smirk evident through the phone, “don’t be shy baby, let me hear you,”

His words send shivers up your spin as your legs tightened around the vibe, holding it in place with your thighs so your hand could sneak up your shirt, “Fuck Jamie, I miss you,” you whined, rubbing your hardened nipples and wishing it was his hands instead.

“Miss you too baby,” Jamie said, feeling his orgasm building up after too many pent-up nights, “Miss your fucking body. Those perfect tits of yours. can’t wait to get back to you. can’t wait to fuck you. fuck I’m not even gonna be able to make it to the bedroom,”

“Yeah?” you asked, closing your eyes to imagine everything he was saying.

“Yeah,” he said, doing the same, “Never know might just fuck you right there on the couch,”

“Then what?” you asked.

Jamie groaned, head rolling back as he tried not to finish as he spoke, but little did, he know your own orgasm was soon building as you began to squeeze your nipples, rolling them between your fingers like Jamie liked to do, “Then I’m gonna take you to the bedroom. Tear off whatever skimpy little thing you’re wearing baby. Then fuck you till the sun comes up. You still touching yourself?” Jamie asked, snapping you from your daydream.

“Yeah,” you said, your voice coming out more like a moan as small moans kept escaping your lips, “Think I’m gonna- “you started to say before you were cut off by your own moans.

“Turn it up,” Jamies voice was husk and commanding and when you tried to say you couldn’t he almost snapped, “Do it,” he commanded, “Cmon you’ve been so good for me so far. I know you can do it baby,”

You whimpered, your hand slipping down to press it one last time. “Fuck,” you whined loudly, the vibrations sent shocks down your spine, your body twitching as your orgasm quickly approached.

“That’s it baby,” Jamie coached, his own hand speeding up as he chased his own release. “Fuck you sound so fucking good right now,” he groaned.

“I can’t wait any longer,” you whined, your eyes clenched tightly shut as you felt ready to explode.

“Then don’t,” Jamie husked, his hips bucking up into his own hand, “Let go baby,” he said, and his words toppled you over the edge. You didn’t try hold back the filthy moans leaving your lips as you came from just your boyfriends voice but as you were coming down from your high you heard Jamie reach his, muttering curses over and over until you assumed he was done.

Jamie looked down at the mess he had made, making a mental note to add it to your punishment list for when he got back, “You okay babe?” you asked, slightly panting as you caught your breath.

“Have I ever told you how much I love you?” Jamie said, making you laugh as you pulled the covers around yourself.

“I love you too baby,” you giggled and for a moment missing him became slightly easier.

A/N: had to repost this since it never uploaded for some reason yesterday so sorry for the wait for anyone following my kinktober

Tags: @angelbarnes-rogers

[patronsaintofteachercrushes]

9/3

Hi everyone, bet you didn’t expect to hear from me again, but here I am. My last year of high school starts tomorrow and I felt like coming back and saying some things. Some things that I realized and figured could maybe help some of you out there, things that I desperately wanted (needed) to hear when I had an active teacher crush.

This is a long one so please bear with me, I’m not sure any of it really makes any kind of sense. Sorry for any typos.

Firstly, my boyfriend actually broke up with me three days after I last posted. It took me a very long time to get over it, in fact I think I’m still dealing with it. But I wanted to come back and share my experience now that I finally had a taste of what I’d felt like I was missing out on.

Some context: I met my ex almost a whole year before we started dating. It was the 4th of July 2023, and I was still coming to terms with my friend's attachment to L and the fact that I did not have anyone to crush on. I went to the beach with some friends so we could be young and reckless and watch the fireworks and all that good American fun. And then I met him. He was sweet and just cute enough and let me light the fireworks he bought. And nothing happened. I told my friends I thought he was cute and they all said I should go for it but I never did. Until October 2023 when we went to the same Halloween party. He tried talking to me about his car to impress me but I don’t know anything about cars so it didn’t really work, but I still thought he was cute and I tried being near him all night. Again, nothing happened. But I still thought he was cute and all my friends still kept urging me to go for it. In January 2024, he added me on Snapchat and we snapped here and there but still never talked. In April, for my 17th birthday, I was throwing a party, and I was convinced to invite him. It was a whole thing, he came late and only stayed for an hour and the time that I did spend talking to him he told me to fuck off. So I did just that, and I let him go. I was upset, naturally, but our mutual friend was sure he did actually like me so he kept convincing him to reach back out to me. The following month after my birthday party we talked all day every day and by May 26th, we were dating.

So, I had basically the most normal of normal teenage relationships. I wish I could come back here and tell you all that “you’re not missing much.” But that’d be a lie. It was a wonderful, beautiful thing. I miss that feeling very much, the way I felt then was the only thing even halfway parallel to the complete and total rush I’ve felt with older men. So, yes, it is possible to find your fix in other places even though it’s entirely different than you imagined. We cuddled and kissed and held hands and he showed me off to his friends. All my friends were jealous, just like I’d fantasized about. I could say things like “oh my boyfriend loves that!” And “we.” It was all very nice. There was this one time, on our first date, we were walking around the city and it was late on a Friday night, and I had this feeling like all the other couples we passed could tell this was our first date of many more to come. Like they could somehow see through me and him. I don’t remember much of what we’d talked about that night, but I remember also feeling like he was going to be my boyfriend. It was a feeling I’ve never experienced before. With H, of course I’d hoped that we was deviant enough to try and make something out of us, but with my ex, I knew that we would be something. It’s a very strange feeling to know something to be true like that. Ultimately, I think this was one of the major factors of our breakup, the fact that I knew what I wanted and he didn’t.

I thought things would never get any better than this, that I had finally found my person. The women in my family have always found their forevers when they were 17, and I figured I was following suit just like them. Right after he’d asked to be my boyfriend, we explained to each other that we’d both pretty much accepted the fact that we’d never have a high school relationship. We talked about even despite that, we kept praying for one. To me, this was a vow. On June 26th however, he decided he wanted to break up. Basically claiming that he’s too busy and that a relationship isn’t something he wants or needs right now. Which is bullshit and he and I both know it. I’m not sure I’ll ever know his exact reasoning for doing so, but that’s besides the point.

The point is that I did a lot of self reflection in the 2 months we’ve been broken up. Probably more than I have ever done, even more than my reformed thoughts about H. I realized that I do still love older men. I still crave that kind of attention. I still actively seek it out. But it’s different now. I realized that I love the unattainability. I love when things are so far out of reach that I can only stretch and crane and sniff at the ‘what-if’ of it all. I love the security of knowing that it’s not reciprocated, that it cannot be returned. I realized that there is peace in the one-sidedness, because if it never leaves me then I never have to confront it or share it. I can live and love within it. It never has to be anything I don’t want it to be. I can be in control of it.

It’s scary when I know that on the other side, that person is feeling something towards me, and that feeling is now something I do not have any say or power over. It grows and winds through them like the roads of my hometown, familiar and unfamiliar all at once. Familiar because I’ve lived here all my life. And unfamiliar like I’m driving at night and know anything might happen to me. And that feeling inside someone, there’s no guarantee it’s going to stay or look the same way every day, it changes, and I still have no say.

But when it’s with someone who can never feel the way I do, I know exactly how it’ll play out. And it’s rather enjoyable when I know that only I have the cards. It can last for however long I wish it to, there’s no expiration date or trial period. I know that it will be there at the end of the day. I cannot say the same for anyone else’s feelings.

The breakup was so hard on me because he was living, breathing proof that I was capable of being liked. Being seen that way. And it was ripped away from me. I’d finally gotten a taste just for it to all have been for nothing. I’m willing to admit the older men I’ve involved myself with in the past have not liked me that way, I was mysterious and promiscuous and the promise of trouble that they’ve craved since they came into adulthood. I was a sexual desire. I still am that sexual desire to them. I don’t really mind that, it’s a little unfortunate that they’ve never loved me like I’ve loved them, but at the end of the day they’re my own kind of sexual desire too. He was a real person, a real teenage boy who liked me. He validated to me what I had always known deep down, that there wasn’t something horribly wrong within me and that someone out there would want to be with me. Despite it being so fleeting, I owe much of who I am in this moment to him and that relationship.

Seeing as my “roster” cleared just as we entered summer, I had so much time for all the things I had been neglecting. Suddenly I had interest in things again. I remembered how much I liked things like superhero movies and The Doors. I had time to focus on things that weren’t how he (my ex, H, any other man I’ve ever involved myself with) felt about me. It was incredibly freeing. I became a new person and it felt like without my knowledge either because of how long I’d been ignoring it. It was sweet to discover who I’d become since the last time I didn’t have a crush.

But, I really do enjoy and miss having a crush. I like the obsession, how it bleeds into all aspects of my life. It gives me a sense of purpose that I’ve never really experienced before. I don’t really care if it’s “bad” to experience this great longing for someone or something, it gives me something to do that I feel like is worth the time. How wonderful to love so deeply. Who am I to withhold that ? Why should I turn it off or dial it down ? I think there should be love in everything we do, whether it be blaring hot and heavy or a dull murmur, everything we do should be mirrored by the love we feel.

But my crushes have always felt so distinctly different from one another. Partly because they are, an older man and a boy my age, but they are also still two sides of the same coin. When I’d fantasize about H I’d mostly envision a private affair. Spending the weekend in a secluded cabin in the woods. Cooking a meal together and dancing in the kitchen. Talking into the late hours of the night, fucking. Which is not to say that I didn’t picture myself out in public with them, because I did very much wish to have a relationship with H that I didn’t need to hide from anyone and where he didn’t need to keep me a secret, I’d just always pictured that kind of a relationship as personal and intimate. A relationship where I didn’t need to perform, where I could just be me and he could be him and there wasn’t any need for saving face. But because I felt so private about it, it bubbled into something pervasive. It became a compulsive need. I couldn’t control myself around him like I’m usually able to do. And it festered within me, it grew and grew until I no longer had any room for it at all.

By contrast, with teenage boys, my fantasies have always surrounded the appearance to other people. I have always pictured him shaking hands with my father, about him winning his big game and running to find me in the stands and give me a Hollywood kiss. I fantasize about him asking me to a school dance with flowers and a big poster, about all my friends being jealous when they see us or when I post him on social media. But those feelings, those daydreams, they’re all always born out of that craving of normalcy. Whenever I like a boy my age, it’s because I get some misplaced idea that he might like me and I get so excited by this that I take it and run with it until the rose-colored haze dissipates and I’m left with the realization that I’ve spent so much wasted time liking a boy who can never give me what I really desire. But this time it was real, and I could be open about it. And it fizzled out. When my ex and I would kiss, I would feel these tiny little fireworks erupting in my stomach. Kissing him felt like everything that’s good in this world, like puppies and springtime and warm chocolate chip cookies. I’ve kissed my fair share of people, and never has it felt like that. It always felt rushed and hungry, like they were trying to extract something very vital from inside of me. It always felt hot and heavy, especially the times that I’d been with older men. And that was nothing like that. It was light and airy, sort of experimental.

I used to find myself getting very angry that H got to go home and go on with his life while I spiraled out of control and became consumed with thoughts of him. He’d go home to his girlfriend and I came home to a quiet house and an anonymous tumblr blog. I used to find it so extremely unfair, you know ? How come he got to say and do all these things that a teacher shouldn’t and carry on like normal ? How come I was the only one facing the consequences ? How come he got to do this with all his girls ? How come he got to make me feel so much, things I have no name for, no way of describing, and I’d have to just remain his student through it all ? Sit there and take it like a dog with his tail between his legs. I didn’t understand how he got away with it. I still don’t understand how he doesn’t care, how he genuinely couldn’t care less about me. He’ll come back this year and do this same routine over again with another girl just like me and rinse and repeat until he retires. I would get so angry wondering what I would get in return. But I don’t feel that way anymore. I miss it. I miss that feeling. I miss the rage, the hurt, the indescribable yearning, the highest of highs, and lowest of lows. Everything he made me feel, whether knowingly and purposefully or not, I miss. Now I’m mostly just mad that I never understood what he was begging me to know. I’m mad that I pushed him away at all. I’d say I’m mad I even met him, but that’d be a lie too. I don’t regret knowing him, not even a little bit. I don’t regret what I felt, what he made me feel. Even when I felt disgusted by him I never regretted any of it. All the times I screamed no I really was screaming yes.

And now I’m a senior. And I don’t have any male teachers. I did end up having J as my 1st period, but I’m not exactly happy about it. J is confusing. He’s too innocent. There’s absolutely nothing there besides a genuine love for teaching. And while that’s admirable, I don’t think it will grow into something. I don’t have any other male teachers besides that. So I’m really not sure what I’m going to do. I plan on visiting H, but I doubt it will really hold me over. I think what most of us like so much about teachers specifically is that we see them so frequently and it’s a guarantee most of the time. I won’t have that anymore. So, I’m feeling pretty lost. Which I bet is a reallllll shocker. I swear I am always feel confused and torn.

Anyway, I guess maybe what I’m trying to say with all of this is that maybe we’re not crazy for this. I think many of us are here and experiencing these feelings because we were born tilted towards the ‘what-if’ and I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing. I think we’re allowed to feel this way towards others. I think that sometimes this is natural. I mean, I got a taste of what it was like, what we watch everyone around us experience while we remain silent and passive, and I still ended up back here the same as I’ve ever been. So can it really be that wrong ? Is it possible to love someone wrong ? Does any of it really matter in the long run ? That I spent a long time devoting myself to someone despite it not being reciprocated ? How bad can that be ? How can love ever be wrong ? On a basis, I do understand where people are coming from when they make exposés on the teacher crush community, but really, I think they haven’t the faintest fucking clue what this side of tumblr really is.