#I TRIED TO GOOGLE IT BUT IT WONT GIVE ME A STRAIGHT ANSWER :(((
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twoa-plus · 2 years ago
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oh my god i’ve been so caught up in other stuff i forgot abt minecraft legends guys is there any new illager lore
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mattserenity · 1 month ago
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𝑨𝑷𝑶𝑪𝑨𝑳𝒀𝑷𝑺𝑬 ᝰ 𝑴.𝑺
𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 mentions of sex, cursing
𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 inexperienced nerd!matt x popular experienced fem!reader
𝒊𝒏 𝒘𝒉𝒊𝒄𝒉.. the popular mean girl is failing in her classes, her teacher forces her to hire a tutor otherwise she wouldn’t make it into her dream college, what happens when she accidentally falls in love with her tutor?
𝒘𝒄 900+
𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆 not proofread, lmk if u want a part 2 with some smut
“your lips, my lips, apocalypse”
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7/100.
written in bright red with a circle around it on the front page of my maths paper. i sigh disappointingly and looked up at my teacher. he did not look impressed.
“i swear i tried my best this time!” i dishonestly stated, flapping my paper around and crossing my arms like a child. truthfully, i spent absolutely no time revising or studying for this test, i didn’t even know it was happening until i walked into my maths class a few weeks ago.
“you clearly aren’t trying hard enough, are you? this is your sixth fail in a row.” he said unhappily, “i have also not received any homework from you this week, it was due 2 days ago.” shit we had homework? i don’t understand the point of homework anyway, everyone just googles the answers or uses ai nowadays, including me, when i could be bothered to do it. which was never
“look, if you keep this up then your going to be looking at a rough future for you, young lady, these grades are not good enough to get you into the college of your dreams, miss.” mr adam’s exclaimed whilst neatly tidying up his desk for his next class. he sounded let down.
seriously? i knew i wasn’t doing great in school but i was sure i wasn’t doing that terribly. “look sir i’m sorry, i’ve just been so stressed and caught up with my cheerleading lately, i had no time to revise!”
“your education is more important than your cheerleading.” he stated, very matter-of-factly. i knew it wasn’t, cheerleading was my passion, i was good at it, so that meant i cared about it more, a lot more.
“whatever, i’ll start studying more.” i rolled my eyes discreetly, hoping he wouldn’t notice my annoyed tone.
“it’s too late for that now. i really would recommend you hire a tutor, i’m sure it would help you improve your grades greatly,” mr adam’s replied, his voice laced with genuine concern.
a tutor, are you kidding me? i burst out laughing, “are you serious? i can’t have a tutor, i would be the laughing stock of senior year!” as much as i hated school and didn’t care about my grades, i needed to be perceived as perfect, no one could know i’m secretly dumb. if anyone knew or saw me with a tutor my life would be ruined.
“i know your popularity is very important to you ma’am, but unfortunately you have no choice now i’m afraid. i will be setting you up with a tutor next week, be prepared.” he added and shooed me out his classroom without giving me a chance to complain.
𝜗𝜚
“your fucking kidding me!” i threw my arms up and frowned, about to have a tantrum as i looked down at my phone, staring, almost as if i couldn’t believe it’s true, at an email from mr adam’s.
“it’s okay! it wont be that bad i promise you!” my best friend, emma, stated trying to make me feel better. she knew full well it was absolutely not going to be okay. emma was the one person i could trust with my life, i had a bunch of “friends” but none of them i really liked, i knew they were all fake and using me for my popularity and money, emma would never do that. we are complete opposites but i think that’s what makes us click so well, she is a straight A+ student and has never missed a day of school. opposites attract after all.
“matthew sturniolo? who the fuck even is that? he sounds like a fucking geek with greasy hair and buck teeth! my life is completely ruined, shit!” i yelled out, wanting to collapse and breakdown in the middle of the school corridors.
“sturniolo..” emma said in deep thought, “i recognise that last name from somewhere,” she added gazing off into the distance. “oh wait! it’s those twins last names! you know, chris and nick?” emma blurted out.
chris was the most popular guy in school, i had a small meaningless thing with him when we were in sophomore year but i cut him off before he ever had the chance to fuck me, he probably has about every STD known to mankind, the way he runs through girls faster than i go through energy drinks. he was very attractive though i had to admit and had every single girl at his feet, begging to suck his dick.
nick was also very popular, but not for the same reasons as chris, nick was the one person every single girl in our year wanted to be friends with, he knew all the gossip about everything and everyone. he was also very enticing and basically every girl had a crush on him, although everybody would admire him from afar and not ever dare make a move since he didn’t swing that way.
“i wonder how matt is in relation to them, maybe a distant cousin?” i questioned, not expecting an answer or wanting an answer to be honest.
“i’m not sure, when is your first tutoring session?” emma asked quizzically, while taking books out of her locker and stuffing them messily into her bag.
“today after school in the library,” i groaned dramatically.
“i’ll make sure to keep you in my prayers, now i have to go, i can’t be late, love you!” emma smiled brightly at me and i waved back and sighed as she strutted away confidently, every boy staring at her, drool practically hanging from their lips the way they looked at her, like a predator looking at its prey.
this is going to be a long day.
© mattserenity. please don’t repost, copy or steal my work without asking for permission or credits.
𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒔 @chrattenthusiast @bernardsbendystraws @chestersturniolo @daddyslilchickenfingers2 @freshloverr @fruitglazed @hearts4chriss @kenzieiskoolaid @mattscoquette @ariestrxsh @mattssluttywaist @muwapsturniolo @m6ttsturniolo @nicksbf @onmykneesformatt @plasticferal @pussypie456 @recklesssturniolo @sturnioloshacker @strniohoeee @sturniolopepsi @whoreforchr1s @yesterdaysproblem @christinarowie332 @itwasmarooonn @freakyellssturniolo @delilahsturniolo @333michelle @annielolz @cconeyislandbaby @chriseatingmeoutin4k @n8doe @jetaimevous @sleepysturn @phimstarz @stonersturns @forgottxen
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icantspeakspanish · 4 years ago
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Being Seijoh‘s queer manager - Headcanons
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Ship: Platonic!Oikawa x Platonic!Reader / Platonic!Iwaizumi x Platonic!Reader / Platonic!Hanamaki x Platonic!Reader / Platonic!Matsukawa x Platonic!Reader
Warnings: actually none. It’s just fluff and maybe the 3rd years flipping of some mean people
masterlist
A/n: I recently can’t stop thinking about headcanons to that, so enjoy I guess🕳🚶
Coming out to them
Oikawa Tooru
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Okay listen
Oikawa pays SO MUCH attention to his friends
Like, if you’re looking at a person longer than u look at other people, this mf will notice that right then and there
Don’t worry, he wont just point that out
Maybe he‘ll drop some dumb comments like the dumb clown he is, but he wont spill anything
Oikawa is going to be more observing
One day you just hang out with him
and this shithead has a fucking plan
I do not kid you when I‘m telling u he has a whole maSTERPLAN??😀
both of you are on your own phone, you scrolling though Instagram liking memes about ur closeted sexuality and laughing inside, I see you
Then Oikawa plays on purpose one song
„Me and your girlfriend playin' dress up at my house..“
You immediately freeze
🎶👹Don’t be suspicious, don’t be suspicious👹🎶
You literally try so hard to sent a gaze on Oikawas phone without him noticing
LMFAO NOT U FAILING
Anyways
You see in the upper corner of your eye how Oikawa is grinning SO BOLD AT YOU BYE
Brb, just getting a tomato to complain it to your face❤️
Tbh, he wasn’t even sure till you turned red like there ain’t no other choice
You just acted obvious as fU-
Oikawa will deadass laugh at your confused face, but then hug you
„Why didn’t you say anything? I could‘ve get you a significant other so much earlier???“
Slap him pls
After you tell him that you just felt really anxious or something like that, Oikawa will hug you again
He will tell you that he loves you no matter what and that he‘s sure the team will too
Oikawa will absolutely get you like a pride flag to surprise you
He‘s so proud of you and happy you told him🥺
Oikawa will literally look in public out for a partner for u 💀
Put a leash on that piece of crap, or I will
If you’re part of the asexual spectrum, Oikawa will make sure no one is making you uncomfortable and to know your boundaries about jokes, touching, etc.
Will text u things like
„Y/N PLEASE DON‘T TELL ME U DATE THEM?? IS U BLIIIIIIND?????!“
Hit him
„If you have to reject this dipshit one more time, I‘ll let Iwaizumi and Kyiotani go WiLD😐“
Love him
„If you wont make a move on them, I will🤨“
Throw him off a bridge
Oikawa is always going to be there for you, ready to let his fangirls flip off everyone who just looks the wrong way at you
He just loves you and wants u to be happy🥺
HE‘S STILL RUDE ASHSDJDN
Iwaizumi Hajime
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Iwa isn’t suspecting anything
Sure, he cares about you, but he doesn’t care about which gender u love
He doesent think that is any of his business, he just wants u to be happy and treaten well and taken care of
Pls I love him
since Iwaizumi wont suspect anything, you’ll have to make the first move into this conversation.
So when you and Iwa walk home after practice it seems like the perfect time
You don’t know how to start, so you sorta just blurt that shit out
„Iwaizumi?“
„What‘s up?“
„I‘m ____“
„Okay.“
Your legs stop moving
You look at him like 👁👄👁
he be having the audacity to stop walking and ask you what’s wrong
„Did you understand what I just said?“
„Yeah, why?“
Y/n.exe stopped working
„WHY DO YOU JUST SAY „OKAY“ LIKE A FOOL?!“
„EXCUSE ME?“
Iwaizumi.exe crashed too
„What else am I supposed to say?! You’re my friend, I don’t care which gender you having sex with!“
He ain’t good with words I‘m sorry🧑‍🦯
Will ruffle you’re hair and tell you not to worry, he can beat up any gender😩👌
I actually don’t think he‘d ask you questions. He doesen’t want to make you uncomfortable and just googles about it if there’s anything he doesen’t understand. Iwaizumi is actually pretty invested and wants to learn about your sexuality since one of his closest friends just came out to him.
If anyone is being rude to you, Iwaizumi will pop off
If he’s shopping or smth like that and sees something with pride colors / your flag colors, he will buy that and give it to you
Definitely ready to beat up anyone who tries to insult you because of your sexuality
Radiates big protective dad energy and wants to meet your partner before y’all go out
Iwa just wants you to stay safe
10/10 would recommend marriage 💯
Hanamaki Takahiro
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„Are you gay?“
You look pale into his face
„whAT?!“
LMFAO I‘D BE CONFUSED TOO
„Is that a yes?“
„MAKKI!“
I don‘t even know why, but he would definitely know
Not your sexuality EXACTLY, but he knows you ain’t straight
Makki also uses that as an explanation and tells you you didn’t looked hetero from the start
Excuse you-
He‘s just a natural i guess
You tell him then what your actual sexuality is and Hanamaki is so chill about it
Will smile at you and tell you that he‘s proud of you and maybe apologizing for blurting that shit out of the blue
If someone is making you uncomfortable in anyway, Hanamaki will hunt them down to make them apologize
he will sent you some lgbtq+ memes and capture it with „That reminds me of u“
Matsukawa Issei
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Hear me out
He makes jokes often
and since you (as seijohs manager) hang out with them often, both of you joke often
like y’all have some insiders, you give joking answers to his jokes
so when you and Mattsun went out to get drinks, he was joking as usual
„He/she’d be a great fiancé. dont you think?“
U look in the direction he’s pointing and see a friend group who’s chatting
„Naaah. His/her friend looks hotter“
u actually said that without thinking and as soon as you realize u started to blush and look to him
Matsukawa still looks into that direction.
„you’re right, they got that dumptruck“ BYE
„Matsukawa Issei, I knew youre an ass dude!“
pls y’all are so casual
after that he asks you if you meant that and really are interested in this gender
„wait that’s ___, right?“
you nod a bit surprised because you didn’t expect him to know the name of your sexuality
WOULD SENT YOU MEMES TOO AND ASK PEOPLE OUT FOR YOU BYE
Matsukawa looks intimidating like Iwaizumi, but he‘d joke around with your date tbh
but if they’re being shitty to you, Matsukawa won’t hesitate to sent them to hell
as long as they won’t hurt you physically, he will make so mean jokes, always pick a fight with them and is SO sarcastic towards them💀
mattsun also made you a playlist with like pride songs
Going to a Pride parade with them!!
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OIKAWA IS SO EXCITED JABSNFBXB
He will absolutely wear a pride flag and be SO proud
he‘ll tries to make some friends for you so you have some people who‘re like you
hes a dumbass, sorry<\3
when you ask Iwaizumi to come with you and the team, he will firstly act annoyed and like he doesen’t want to go but Oikawa drags him anyway dw
if there’s like rainbow ice he will buy it for you what a sugar daddy
Iwaizumi will act annoyed and bored for most of the time, but as soon as you look two seconds away from him and turn back around, this men has rainbow flags on both of his cheeks🥺
someone also gave him a small pride flag and he’s swinging it since then the entire time GOD I‘M SO DOWN FOR SOFT IWAIZUMI PLEASE
some guys talked to him because they thought he’s 💅🏻 and hot and Oikawa let out a scream BAHAHA
Iwa explained himself so politely tho<3
Hanamaki found SO MANY FRIENDS GOODBYE
ofc he and matsukawa bought this thing with what you can draw those rainbow flags on your cheeks and they put it on Oikawas, yours, Iwaizumis and their own face
actually they have now rainbowflags all over their body because they think they look cool🧚‍♀️
and they will protect you from creeps <3
remember when I said Mattsun made a playlist for you? Oikawa‘s blasting that shit and dancing to it ofc he danced with you duh
after that day, Hanamaki changed y’all’s gc name to „y/n‘s protection squad“
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into-control · 3 years ago
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Into i need help. I bought a oculus quest 2 right and i tried to connect it to my laptop and it wont work so I realized i needed and actual pc gaming setup you know, problem is idk anything about PCs and i dont wanna get scammed. Can you help me? Ive looked online and idk wtf im looking at tbh. Can you give like advice and shit lol 😂 love you into 💕
well i'm not a professional at pcs by any means but i've always had a huge fixation on them so i can try to help as much as possible and i'll even try to put it in simple terms. fair warning, i talk A LOT in this post because i love rambling about computers :') i tried to use the simplest terms possible since you seem confused but if something doesn't make sense just ask and i can try to reword.
it all depends on what you want out of your pc. and do you want to build one or get a prebuilt one? if you want my advice i recommend building one. getting a prebuilt pc is the easiest way to get scammed because retailers tend to overcharge and they think they can get away with it because they stuck a flashy high end graphics card and colourful lights in it even though it has shit airflow and they cheaped out on the motherboard and power supply or something like that. if you're going to get a prebuilt pc make sure you look at allll the specs and consult some online reviews to see if they're any good, and figure out if you're going to be overcharged. now i'll talk about building one. a lot of this will still be useful if you're considering buying a prebuilt though.
the very first step is deciding your budget. idk where you are but in USD the typical amount to spend on pc parts is i think like $1000 - 1500 (you can spend less but that's if you don't have a lot of money to spend and are still desperate to have a gaming pc). i'm spending around $1700 CAD (before taxes, eugh) on mine bc i want to get into more demanding games eventually. it sounds very costly but computers like these can last you a decade and are very multifaceted. figuring out your budget first instead of going right ahead and buying stuff is important because each component should take up specific percentages of your budget. another important thing to consider when deciding your budget is if you want RGB (the colourful lights as previously mentioned), because components with that capability are slightly more expensive.
after deciding your budget, your first move is deciding what graphics card (GPU) you want. the GPU is responsible for processing and presenting the visuals on your screen. theoretically it should take up between 35 - 40% of your budget because it is the powerhouse in a gaming system. you have two developers to choose from here: NVIDIA or AMD. from what i've seen people tend to prefer NVIDIA but AMD cards aren't bad and they definitely compete in performance. i'll talk about nvidia though because that's what i know more about. by searching up the oculus quest 2 system requirements it tells me you at least need an nvidia geforce gtx 970. this card came out in 2014 and is by no means bad however it is actually the same base price as a lot of newer cards. if you want to go better than the minimum requirements, first consider what your monitor is capable of. if you don't have one yet, consider what you want it to do. monitors are not considered a part of the budget i keep mentioning by the way. idk how much this matters to you since we're talking about the oculus quest 2 but i'm just kind of assuming you're going to use this pc for other games too. the main two things to take into consideration are max resolution and refresh rate. my monitor has a resolution of 1920 x 1080 and a 144hz refresh rate. what the resolution means is that there are 2,073,600 pixels in the screen, and can go up to a resolution of 1080p in video games. the refresh rate means the monitor can refresh the picture on the screen 144 times a second, therefore can show a max of 144 frames per second in a video game. to put that in to perspective, most screens have a refresh rate of 60hz, such as regular laptop screens, iphone screens, etc.. monitors come in mainly 60hz, 75hz, 144hz, and 165hz, and for resolution they mainly come in 1080p, 1440p, and 4k. seeing as i don't have any plans on upgrading my monitor any time soon, dropping extra money on a GPU that can achieve more than 144fps and 1440p/4k would be pointless. but forget about the monitor, the oculus quest 2 has a max refresh rate of 120hz and its resolution lies somewhere between 1080p and 1440p. if you know what kind of games you're going to be playing, look up how they perform with different kinds of cards. i'm fairly certain anything above an nvidia geforce rtx 3070 would be pointless because of your display limits, and anything below the nvidia geforce gtx 970 simply won't be enough for the system. you can look at all the GPUs ranked here. after deciding which GPU you want you need to figure out which brand of it you want (NVIDIA themselves, asus, gigabyte, evga, etc), because they all perform at slightly different levels, although the difference is usually only a few frames so it's better to save money. something to watch out for is the quality of the fans in the GPU because if they aren't good, it will overheat and underperform. i'm aiming to get a 3060 or 3060 ti, if that helps. the only problem is that there is currently a worldwide GPU shortage due to covid, tariffs, and the cryptocurrency mining boom (gpus are used in bulk to mine). fortunately there is currently a crypto mining crackdown happening in china, where majority of mining in the world happens, so the demand for GPUs will hopefully start going down soon. you wont be able to build your pc right away but the market is looking better than it has in awhile. this is just about the only argument i have in favor of getting a prebuilt pc, because they have GPUs in them and are more readily available. i don't think that's a good enough reason though especially since part of the reason i'm building my pc is because it looks fun lol. another thing to note is that you should not overspend on your GPU. the shortage has caused a lot of GPU prices to skyrocket into the $2k-3k range but none of them should be above 1k except the highest end ones. when deciding on a GPU, search up the manufacturer's suggested retail price (MSRP). cards made by brands other than AMD and NVIDIA will almost always cost a little extra, but do not pay hundreds of
extra dollars. but anyways!! the GPU is now out of the way and is definitely the longest paragraph here because it's the most important part.
next up is the central processing unit (CPU), which you should be spending about 20 - 25% of your budget on. its job is essentially to retrieve instructions from the RAM and execute it. i suppose you could call it the brain. again you have two developers to choose from, this time between intel and AMD. i've had two laptops with an intel CPU and my current one has an AMD CPU and both are very good, however the general consensus is that you can get the same performance for less by going with AMD. CPUs have cores, and each core can run its own process. the more cores you have, the more your pc can think about basically. you can get CPUs will all sorts of amounts of cores but for gaming, 4 or 6 cores is all you really need. 8 is actually already a bit overkill. so you really don't need to get the best CPU out there. the one you get should depend on what GPU you get (hence choosing that component first). you don't want to bottleneck your GPU by getting a CPU that isn't good enough for it, but bottlenecking your CPU with the GPU by a small amount isn't as big of a deal because the goal is to allow your GPU to be used to its full ability. another detail about CPU is clock speed, which determines how quick it can complete tasks. the higher the faster, obviously. my (non gaming) laptop's CPU clock speed is 2.30 GHz and has 4 cores. the cpu i have for my build is the AMD ryzen 5 5600x. it has a base clock speed of 3.7 GHz but it can be maxed out to 4.6 GHz, and it has 6 cores. the oculus quest 2 has a minimum requirement of the AMD ryzen 5 1500x or the intel i5-4590, which is a little low on the performance list. but like i said the CPU should depend on the GPU. all it takes is a google search for which CPU goes best with the GPU you've chosen and you can find several answers depending on if you want the best possible performance, best budget performance, etc.. a nice little fact about choosing AMD over intel is that most AMD CPUs will come with a stock cooler, which is absolutely necessary otherwise your CPU will overheat (this is another thing prebuilts will cheap out on). this only adds to the whole price-to-performance thing. the stock cooler will most likely do unless you push your pc or want the build to look prettier.
next on the list is a motherboard, where all the parts come together in unity. you should spend 8 - 10% of your budget on this baby. it's easy to over and underspend on a mobo. the most important thing when it comes to choosing a mobo is that it supports your CPU. you cannot use the same mobo for intel and AMD CPUs. fortunately the product page will straight up tell you which CPU brand the mobo is meant for and will typically have two versions of the same board. it's important to note that motherboards don't always have onboard wifi, meaning it wont be able to connect to the internet via wifi and instead needs an ethernet cable or an external wifi adapter. if you can't get an ethernet cable to the room where you want your pc, you're going to need onboard wifi, or a wifi card/usb. onboard wifi mobos tend to be more expensive so it's up to you, but i personally bought one with wifi included so i wouldn't have to worry about it because our ethernet cables are in the basement and i'm upstairs. another very important thing about motherboards is that their BIOS version (operating system i guess?? idk how else to describe it) doesn't always support your CPU out of the box and must be updated before using it. this can present as a problem if you don't have another CPU to perform the update with, however some motherboards allow you to 'flash' the BIOS with a only usb drive as long as it's hooked up to power. there are plenty of step by step youtube videos about how to do this. i will have to do this with my motherboard when the time comes because it doesn't support ryzen 5s out of the box. don't let this deter you from getting a certain board as long as it has a BIOS flash feature. next up is what I/O ports you want, which are the ports (usb ports, headphone/mic jack, hdmi port, etc) you'd find on the back of any desktop computer. that is the side of the motherboard. basically just be aware of how many of each ports you want, and remember that there will probably be even more ports on the front of the case you get. the last thing i can think of right now is making sure your motherboard has all the headers (where you plug components in) you want it to have but i'll get to that later.
next up on the list is RAM, aka random access memory. this stores short term data. the amount of RAM you have kind of determines how much your pc can multitask. RAM sticks typically go up by some multiple of 2GB. most standard laptops and desktops nowadays will come with 8GB of RAM, which is enough for day to day use. it can be enough for mid and low end games however it cuts it pretty close most of the time. 16GB of RAM is the sweet spot for gaming and anything above that is pretty much overkill (and once again a waste of money) as long as you don't have a billion unnecessary background processes. a large amount of RAM is typically needed for video editors or computer programmers. you should always make sure your motherboard can support the amount of RAM you want although any good motherboard will support 64GB or even 128GB. the best option is to get a 16GB RAM pack, which will include two 8GB RAM sticks. splitting RAM between two sticks will increase efficiency. this is called dual channel. i also recommend getting DDR4 RAM, which is simply faster than DDR3. a good speed to have is around 3600 MHz. make sure your motherboard supports DDR4. you also want to be weary that your RAM is compatible with your CPU brand because they do have to interact for your pc to function.
next is storage. there are three-ish options here depending on how much you're willing to spend. generally you should spend 8 - 10% of the budget here. you can always get a good ole hard drive for the cheapest, however they are the slowest and physically biggest option, meaning whatever you put on it will take a bit longer for your pc to retrieve and open (they can load about 100-200MB of data per second). the next option is a solid state drive. they are a little more expensive but can load as much as 600MB of data per second and take up less space. the last and most efficient/expensive option is an m.2 nvme drive. these things are physically absolutely tiny and can load up to 4GB of data per second. anything you put on these will open very very quickly. the fairly standard solution for this is a combination of two of these three. personally i'm using one m.2 drive and one hard drive. the hard drive i have can store 2TB while the m.2 drive can only store 256GB. funnily enough these two drives are roughly the same price. the idea here is to install your operating system on the faster drive. this makes it so it only takes like 8 seconds tops for your pc to start up. you can also put any other programs you use most often on there (like your main browser and favourite games) and they will open very quickly, while the bulk of your games and other files will go on the bigger drive. that's all there really is to say for storage, just make sure the reviews are good on the drive you want to get, but that goes for any component.
next is your power supply (PSU). very very important to not cheap out on this. 6 - 8% of the budget should go to this. the function of the PSU is to do exactly what its name implies: supply power to all the components. this is where the website pcpartpicker can come in very handy. not only does it help you build a list of parts that are all compatible with each other, it will also estimate how much wattage you will need to run your pc. 600W is usually enough for a normal gaming pc. PSUs are ranked, and you should never really go below a bronze ranking. you can also choose between non-modular, semi-modular, and fully-modular PSUs. non-modular PSUs have all the cables permanently attached. this can be desirable to people who are confused by what cable is plugged in where but also undesirable as unused cables cannot be removed and make cable management harder. fully-modular PSUs come with the cables all in a separate bag so you choose which ones to plug in. semi-modular power supplies have the necessary cables attached and the rest can be attached need be. it all depends on preference and how much faith you have in yourself. i have an 80+ gold certified fully modular 750W PSU because the thought of unnecessary cable management makes me sick lol. corsair is pretty much the most trusted brand for power supplies. be careful because this is another place prebuilts will cut corners.
now for the case! this one isn't overly difficult to choose and mainly will just appeal to your aesthetics. it's less important to stick to a precise percent of the budget for this one but you also don't want to spend more than 8%. do you want a black case? a white one? do you want a glass side panel so you can see inside your pc and admire your hard work? besides that, you also need to make sure the case is big enough for your motherboard, GPU, and PSU. most info pages for cases will tell you the max size of the GPU and PSU and what size of mobo it's meant for. you also want to make sure there is a place to put your storage drives (unless you only have m.2 drives which are installed on the motherboard). you also want to make sure it has optimal airflow abilities. a case with no airflow will cause overheating. the best ones have mesh fronts and tops to allow cool air to be pulled in and hot air out. it's even better if you can get a case that comes with fans in the front, because they are what pulls that cool air in.
next is the CPU cooler, which i briefly mentioned. if you don't get an AMD CPU then you'll need to buy a separate cooler. you can choose between air coolers (a fan and a heatsink) or liquid coolers. i don't really have much to say about them and i recommend doing your own research on liquid coolers lol.
last but not least, case fans. like i said a lot of cases will come with front fans and also an exhaust fan at the back, however you might want more, or even replace the ones you already have with better ones. pay attention to how many fans your case manual says can fit and plan accordingly. check out reviews to see if the fans you want are quiet and efficient. if you buy a three pack of case fans there is a chance it will come with a fan hub. this makes it easier to control all of them in sync because the hub will connect all the fans to one header on the motherboard. generally 3-6 fans are pretty good for a gaming pc. two or three in the front pulling in cool air, one at the back and two on the top to pull out hot air.
now that i have all the components out of the way i'm gonna talk about RGB lighting. numerous components that i've mentioned have the option of including LED lights to make your pc brightly coloured, which is always nice if you have a glass side panel on your pc. it's an extra bit of money but i personally was willing to sacrifice that because i want to show off my build lmao. motherboards, RAM sticks, GPUs, CPU coolers, and case fans are the main components that can come with RGB lighting. you can also get special LED strips and power connectors designed for PCs. if you decide to go for RGB lighting, do try to stick to one RGB ecosystem, meaning make sure all the RGB components can be controlled by one program. RGB is controlled by your motherboard. for example if you get an asus motherboard you'll probably want to use their program, aura sync. most components can be controlled by any brand's program however if the motherboard itself has RGB lighting it can only be controlled via its own brand's program, along with the GPU. if you want RGB case fans you really have to make sure your motherboard has RGB headers (the thingy on the motherboard where you plug the fan's LED lights into). most motherboards will only have two-ish RGB headers so if you're going to buy a bunch of fans make sure they come with a fan hub, which lets you plug them all into one header on the motherboard. also, never sacrifice performance for RGB. specifically when it comes to GPUs. if you have a choice between a GPU with RGB and a GPU without RGB, always take the one that has better performance (given it's within the parameters i mentioned earlier).
that's all i have to say :) if you couldn't tell i really love this stuff. i will also recommend you watch youtube videos about this, you can see the build process and the reasoning for using each component, and also tips on what to do and what not to do. i hope this helps and wasn't too confusing. i know you said this is mainly because you got an oculus quest 2 but if you're going to get a gaming pc you should definitely consider games outside of the oculus too.
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iknowicanbutwhy · 4 years ago
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To anyone who thinks texting is a billion times worse than talking on the phone and that texting is a miscommunication disaster ready to happen: I get you. You're probably 100% exactly like my friend who I hate texting despite how i rather appreciate talking with them on call or in-person.
Hear me out, though. Please.
You know what's weird? I love talking with my other friend on text more than i talk with them in real life. No, it's not because they're untalkative irl. No, it's not because they have a different personality in text. No, it's not because they have any trouble whatsoever communicating in-person (more than the usual trouble everyone sometimes deals with).
It's because I'm the one with the auditory communication issues. I stammer and stutter, I can't forward my opinion in that microscopic pause between people talking, i can't think quickly when i or someone else is speaking, i can't think quickly, and i can't double check my grammar when ive already said something - among other problems.
And that friend i like to text? Just so happens to be skilled at texting.
Yes, texting well is a skill. Something that you can learn and cultivate and look up on Google. So if you hate texting and find it irredeemable, you probably don't have the skill for it. But you can still learn just by using your normal speaking skills while remembering and sticking with only a few bitty - yet crucial - rules of texting.
You may not want to learn to text. You may want to speak and text only when necessary. You may defend your point by stating that texting lacks key human communication, such as body language, tone of voice, rhythm of voice, and other context that adds to the meaning of words in a way texting could never have. Aaaand you'd be right, actually. Italics and bold and emojis/emoticons and writing style can only do so much while the imagination fills in the gaps - and unlike with books, if the imagination sees/hears something terrible in a text, it's offensive instead of interesting.
So, what about the people who don't have the skill to make coherent, intelligent sentences with their mouth in the first place? The context doesn't help too much, then. Of course, why should you have to learn how to text when clearly these people who are afflicted by their inability to speak should be learning how to talk, because it's more effective and healthier for them that way?
You're right, they should be learning. And they are! There's no avoiding speaking in real life unless you're mute, selectively mute (let's be understanding), deaf (sometimes they learn to speak and that's awesome), or something else I can't think of. Those with speech impediments - when they don't know sign or there's no one who knows sign nearby - are generally forced to try to speak, and are constantly training to communicate well. People with social anxiety don't want to be afraid of talking, and especially if you befriend someone with social anxiety in real life and talk with them in-person, they'll try their best to open up in-person too. And me? Who can't think fast enough to speak for some reason? I'm trying to change that, too. I hate being unable to speak as well as I text, because speaking is more efficient.
But it would still be really, really nice to have a deliciously complex conversation sometimes, and for those of us with trouble speaking, we developed the skill of texting to better fulfill that human need to communicate and share. We're trying to speak. But.. it would be really nice of you to text.
To text more than just "okay"
To elaborate on "I can't"
To exclaim more than only "ah"
To give something that isn't difficult to find a specific response to.
And it can be easy to; we text-savvy people swear our hearts on it!! Google provides lots of good links when you search "how to text well," but I'll sum up a few common tips to texting with meaning.
Text proportionally. This is probably the only rule you need to remember, because all-in-all, the best way to text someone (if they're not sending one or two words a text) is to follow in their example. If they ask your opinion? Tell them yours and ask theirs. If they send texts of two or three sentences each? It's polite to try responding with the same magnitude (keyword: try. You can't always do it). They send you a paragraph? You don't have to send one back (even though that'd be real cool) but if they seem to be expecting a thorough response, don't be afraid to tell them you can't think of much. Just make sure you follow tip #2. Just imagine what it's like talking to a cat that only meows vaguely at you in response. Maybe you think the cat is smart enough to somewhat understand, and you're getting the chance to let your thoughts out at it, but getting basically nothing back is kind of boring.
Dont send curt, few-worded answers. This includes saying just "k" or "ah" or part of a sentence that you're never gonna finish. It sends the message that you're not interested in thinking about whatever the person texting you just said. Sometimes you can send a tiny response as a joke, but do it over and over again, and the other person will think you're never interested in talking. If you're not interested in talking (not just in text, i mean audibly too), it'd be less rude to simply say your not up for talking, with a short, polite apology.
Respond as soon as possible to a genuine question. If you need to think, say so. If you can't respond just yet, say so. This is a personal thing for me. I'm in the middle of a conversation that has been active for a while, i ask an important (sometimes timed) question, and nobody responds for an hour. I lose confidence and take the silence as "no, don't be ridiculous," and take back what i said. Then, very suddenly, i get a response finally informing me that someone needed to ask their mom and the conversation took a while, or they were researching the question, or chores suddenly came up, or etc etc. People get busy all the time, and especially on text, it's easy to suddenly drop out because something irl shows up. But it's hard to tell the difference between being ignored, missed, or being considered. Your excuses are valid, but even a vague "brb" and then later a quick explanation would be more informative than straight silence.
If you need to leave in the middle of a conversation that's been very active, say so. Building off of the last one, it's just polite to be informative. Now, you don't have to say you're doing this at some specific location for a particular amount of hours and you'll be hanging out with whats-their-name and then you'll go into the bathroom and pick your nose in the mirror - no, you don't have to be specific. Just make it clear that you'll be gone for a bit and you'll get back to the conversation another vague time. It's polite, that's all, and alleviates the worries of all us anxious individuals who think "oh no did i say something wrong its been like 20 minutes and they left suddenly-"
Try to leave an avenue of conversation open for the other person to pick up on. This one is easy because generally, all you need to do is think of an open-ended question that isnt yes-or-no. Say something, then ask a question that relates to what you said that the other person can add to. Like.. the other person said they like a certain band, and you like that band, too. You could tell them your favorite song from them and gush about why, then ask what their favorite song is and why? Then it's up to them to give a good response.
If a conversation turns exhausting because you feel like you're pulling all the weight, then drop it and politely say goodbye. There's all these tips about good texting but sometimes, when you can't bring the other person out of their shell or they are genuinely uninterested, it's because they are the ones not doing their part in the conversation. You've tried your best, and if they wont thank you, then I will. And someone in your future who knows how to text and is interested in what you have to say will thank you in their heart. Just, not the person who you're walking away from right now.
Observe the texting "body language" of others. This sounds weird, but examples of this would be using bold to outline the absolute importance of things, italics to slightly emphasize something, s p a c i n g to signify your mind being blown, emojis to express light emotion (unless someone uses way too many, which, that's just a bad habit and sometimes an art form), "ha" for sarcastic laughter, fjsjskajfjie for real laughter, ALL CAPS for high energy, etc. Im sure you can Google it, too, otherwise you can just learn from experience. It's all generally very universal unless you meet a Homestuck, and pretty soon, picking out and giving out emotions in everyday text will be a little easier.
That's all I got right now. Thank you for reading this far and indulging me with this topic. It's okay if you want to keep your avenues of conversation far away from texting, because it's all your own choice, but just know that if you ever do find someone interesting who speaks better in text, it's not impossible for you to communicate with them as well in that format. Just takes practice :) (<- that's a genuine, gentle smile, otherwise I would use c: or :3. Someone else may use it differently, however. Think of it like my personal accent.)
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jumoonjae · 4 years ago
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I’LL NEVER LOVE AGAIN- THE STORM
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PART 1 PART 2 PART 4 PART 5
Pairings: Ji Changmin (Q) X Reader X Jaehyun (Hyunjae) Ft Kevin Moon  Genre: Fluff x Angst X SLIGHT SMUT  Word count: 21,562 words
Summary: A talent show will take place in three week times and you still struggling with putting emotion in the song that you choose, a masterpiece by Lady Gaga, ‘I’ll never love again’. You meet Changmin who you fall for instantly after he jumps in to help you figuring out how to perform the song. Will he manage to help you? Or will he be the one who cause you to sing the song for him? Image are not mine. Credit to Google.
Changmin
He came late to his group gathering after sending her back to her dorm after another sleepover last night which he had a hard time saying goodbye with a long make out session in his car before he had to let her go and promised to meet her after her class end tomorrow evening.
“Changmin-ah.” Jaehyun call as soon as he get into the restaurant.
“Hyung.” He smiles and walk straight to him giving him a long manly hugs before greeting the other and Kevin who was oddly silent.
“How are you? Isn’t it your semester break too? If you told me you’re here during your break, I’m not going back and hang out with you instead.” Jaehyun pat his shoulder as he took the seat between Jaehyun and Kevin.
“Yeah it was. But I’m helping my girlfriend out with her performance next week, then I’ll be spending the rest of my break with Ghana afterwards.” He didn’t realize how Kevin’s eyes almost popped out from its socket after he heard the words girlfriend. He leaned forward to get Changmin’s attention asking for explanation but the guy just pushed him away playfully and there’s a glint of shyness plastered on his face.
“Girlfriend? Wow. I’m happy for you. Finally, its almost a year now am I right?” Jaehyun smiles at him and he nods. Its no that can’t move on from his ex or anything, its just tiring dealing with the heartbreak. He needs to start over in relationship again sooner or later and she just came into the picture. He was more than happy to claim her for himself.
“Yeah. We just made it official. I think you know her too because she’s Kevi..” He stop at his words when he saw the name of the girl he has spent the whole weekend with a heart emoji and a candid picture of her smiling so sweet holding a flower bouquet admiring it pops on Jaehyun’s phone waiting for Jaehyun to answer, his heart drop dangerously a thousand feet, free falling. The picture probably taken way back because her hair was black and she still look exceptionally beautiful that it hurts him so bad.
“Excuse me guys. Baby hey, why aren’t you answering my calls?” Everything around him seems like a picture that it has stop for a moment, he didn’t move or say anything it's like his body is shutting down, a shock is an understatement to describe how he feels, he was numbed that he couldn’t process what was happening, it was happening so fast that he think that maybe what happened during the weekend was only a dream. Or was it really? He felt a hand squeezing his shoulder and look to his right to find Kevin giving him an apologetic look and that was when he felt the pain, and then anger.
“Kevin. What is this?” His voice came out shaky but loud enough to make the other stop talking and all the attention was on him. He couldn’t believe that the girl he fell hard for which he spent his whole weekend with was the one who his hyung always brag about all the time. How he wish he could turn back time and.. he don’t even have a clue what to do if he turns back time. Falling for her was never an option, it was not something he can control. Maybe it was his fault for falling for her and he has no idea what to do or how to react. He was hurt. No. He felt betrayed and he had to control himself so he wont snap on anyone by balling up his fist tightly until his knuckles turns white.
“Its not what you think Changmin. You need to give her chance to explain. It’s a lot more complicated than what you think.” Kevin grab his shoulder gently try to calm him but he felt otherwise. He was furious but he want to heard it from Kevin if its not from her. Well at least he has a clue about the situation.
“Tell me then Kev. Tell me the truth.” He was about to lose his mind but he couldn’t snap at Kevin because it wasn’t his fault and he couldn’t blame her either because he needs to know from her side of story too.
“I can’t because I’m not in that place to tell you or him. She needs to tell you both herself. But I promise that all her feeling for you is genuine.” Kevin try to talk him out while the other has no clue what was going on. But his answer wasn’t enough, it drive him to the edge even more.
He rub his face harshly out of frustration while Kevin still try to calm him down but when he look out, he saw her outside walking towards Jaehyun. She look fresh with no make up on, nothing. Not even her signature red lips. She wears her black hoodie and matching back ripped jeans and he hates it because he still admires her for it and it kills him to think that she was more comfortable showing her raw side to Jaehyun than him. He prayed hard that it was all a lie. That she was just trying to pull a prank on him and hoping that she’ll walk into the restaurant and run to his embrace instead. But it wasn’t. Because she was walking into another man’s arm making his heart shattered into a million pieces. That was it. That’s the answer he’s been searching for and he wont need any explanation from anyone anymore. He couldn’t stand to look any longer before mustering all the strength he got left and stand abruptly wanting to leave.
“Changmin wait. Please let her explain.” Kevin grab his wrist but he pull away harshly. He was mad. Mad at her, at Kevin and at anyone who already knew about her and Jaehyun but just let him fall for her. Everyone is at fault.  
“You and your best friend can just go to hell.” He growled before walking to the main door towards her and Jaehyun. He saw how her tensing up when Jaehyun pull out a dark blue velvet box from his pocket making Changmin stop walking and as by looking at her in another man arm couldn’t hurt enough, this time he felt like dying is a better option than watching another man was about to propose to her. He saw how she covered her mouth and she frowned when he reveals a diamond ring to her, she looked uncertain and he was disinterested to know why because he was too clouded by his anger. He was about to give up on everything because the pain was unbearable. Her eyes suddenly wanders and caught his who was staring, taking in all the hurt she had caused that he will later will use it against her while she was in shock that she didn’t even look away when Jaehyun shook her body lightly trying to get her attention back to him, the velvet box was closed and Jaehyun followed her line of sight to find him, Jaehyun was confused that he keep looking back and forth at Changmin and her. With the last strength he could muster in his numb body, he walked out the door heading the opposite way from where they both were standing.
“Changmin wait.” He heard her sweet voice calling for him while Jaehyun calls for hers but he didn’t stop even how much he want to. He fight the voice inside his head that asking him to stay and listen to her explanation, but his heart was hurting and he don’t want to cry or fall back into her, what if she tell lies? No. He wont stop or look back or even gives her the chance to play him. He got into his car and speed up without looking back to save himself from breaking apart and refuse to cry in front of her or anyone. He bit his quivering lips hard before hitting the brake stop by the park when he’s sure that he’s far enough from everyone else where he finally break down into tears. He press his eyes hard using his palm to stop himself from crying.
“How could you.” He cries letting it all out. His heart was broken beyond repair and even she couldn’t fix it. She’s broken glass that he had thrown himself into, and falling for her was like walking on a shattered broken glass, the more he tries to pull the pieces out, the more damage it causes.
Y/N
You smiles closing the door to your room before plopping into your bed shrieking excitedly. You rolled on your back and smile again staring at the ceiling and how you wish that you still staring at his ceiling instead of yours. You decided to take a bath before doing your assignment and call Changmin afterwards. You took out your phone to charge it and realize it was dead for almost 2 days, you smiles again reminiscing the past two day when nothing else matter as long as you have him with you. You turn it on after connecting the charger and it was bombarded by texts and dozens of miscall from Jaehyun washing your smile away. You had forgotten about him for the past two weeks when you were too occupied with Changmin. You were happy and you’re determined that you’ll tell Jaehyun the truth as soon as you can. You decided to check all the text before heading to bathroom.
‘Y/N I’m at Seoul now. Where are you?’
And few asking the same thing but the last and the most recent was the one that made you broke a cold sweats.
‘I love you. I have a surprise for you and for our future. Please call me back. I missed you baby.’
You know what he was about to do because before his semester break, he keep asking about what kind of jewelry do you like and keep showing you a video of man proposing and shit like that and even ask how would you feel if someone proposed to you like that. You suddenly regret for not telling him earlier and making him wait for years. You went to the bathroom to take a shower before calling him as you head out from your room.
“Baby hey, why aren’t you answering my calls?” You stop at your tracks when he greets making inside of you churns at the pet name that he gave without your permission and it somehow made you disgusted with yourself for letting another man other than Changmin calling you that.
“We need to talk. Where are you?” You said urgently, putting on your Vans before walking out of your dorm.
“I’m at the restaurant near your dorm, you want me to come and pick you up?” You know the restaurant located few minutes away just by walking from your dorm and you run. You run hoping that it won't be too late for you to tell him before Kevin does or Changmin. You pretty sure they both hang out together because you knew they both know Kevin and Kevin only have one group of friend. You run without cutting the call until you saw him standing outside the usual restaurant they always went to.
“Oppa.” You call out finally cutting the phone call and he smiles widely as you walked towards him. It kills you that you has to hurt him after knowing what he will do. But you have to, you need to choose between him or Changmin and you didn’t even need to think twice to choose Changmin over anyone else. You stare at him trying to smile back at him, trying blurt out the words you’ve been trying to tell him. But you couldn’t, you were very fond to him, he was your first best friend before he decided to confessed and scared you away. But he never stop chasing you, maybe because you never dare to hurt him or push him away. You love him as a friend but now you need to tell him to stop. You need to tell him the truth.
“Y/N. Oh my god I miss you.” He pulls you into his embrace but you didn’t wrap your hands on him like you always did when Changmin hugs you. You push him away lightly not wanting to hurt him and you hate yourself for doing so. Because you keep on giving him hopes. You don’t mind before because you didn’t have Changmin. But now you have him and you want to cut this non-existent relationship that you and Jaehyun has caught in. You want to stop giving him hopes even if you have no clue how to. You will try anything for god sake.
“I bought something for you.” He pulls out a dark blue velvet box from his pocket and your world came crushing down even you know this will come. You covered your mouth to hide the quivering of your lips when he open the box revealing a diamond ring inside it. If people who doesn’t know your situation they might be feel happy for you. But you almost broke into tears when the guilt started to eat you up. How could you push him when all you could see inside his eyes was sincerity. You stare at his sweet smiley face that was gleaming and it rip you apart because you’re going to take his happiness away. You are the one to blame when his smiles fades and you are the bad guy who will break his heart.  
“Can you please marry me? You still can take your master if you want. We can sort things out just like we always did when we’re in high school.” And at the moment you prayed to god that the ground swallowed you whole and you try to avoid his eyes but somehow your eyes found at a pair of eyes that you adores so much from inside the restaurant standing still probably saw the whole thing. You could feel your heart and head stop working and all your senses numbed when you saw the hurt in his eyes. He look away and walked out the door to the opposite side from where you and Jaehyun were and you started to panic.
“Changmin-ah.” You called and started to run after him. But luck wasn’t at you side when he got into his car and drive away leaving you behind.
“No please. Changmin.” You scream on top of your lungs running to the busy road and almost got hit by a speeding car if it wasn’t Kevin who pull you away from the road.
“Kevin.” You whispered as he grab your both arms trying to get you on your senses.
“Just let him settles first. Just let him be.” He pulls you into his embrace as you break down in tears.
“Y/N.” You heard Jaehyun calling your name but you refuse to look up. You afraid that you’ll lash him out when it was your fault in the first place. You know you just broke his heart too and it will kill you to see his face now. You can’t even apologize to him. Its too late now for everything. Its too late to apologize, its too late to explain. Its too late to fix thing and everything was your fault.  
“Take me home please Kevin. Take me home.” You plead and you could feel he’s turning his head to Jaehyun.
“I’ll call you later hyung. I’m sorry.” He said before starts walking to your dorm leaving the guy behind.
“I should have warned you yesterday I’m sorry. I just don’t think..” you both were almost at your dorm when he breaks the silence between you two which made you stop walking.
“You knew?” You push his body away from you to take a look on his face. You felt you scalp tightens and got goosebumps from his words.
“Why didn’t tell me Kevin?” You snap at him and trying to throw all the blame at him entirely because you’re being denial. You cant register what you have lose in the span of just thirty minute and now you’re going to lose your best friend too. He was taken aback by your sudden rage at him.
“I didn’t know you already made it official with Changmin Y/N. All of you three are my friend. It wont be fair for Jaehyun hyung If I told you about his plans. Do you think I have the choice? Even if I have I cant choose sides. You all are my friend. I didn’t choose to stuck in your love triangle Y/N. But I have warned you about Jaehyun’s hyung feeling and you did nothing about it. You left the poor guy standing on cliff for god sake.” You cover your mouth as his words hit you hard and pull you back to reality. He was right. It was your fault. It will always be your fault. You throw yourself into the mess.
“Don’t blame me for things that you have started. I’ve done my part Y/N.” He lashes out on you making you broke harder into tears. You feel bad for lashing on him and you run back to your dorm leaving him behind and lock yourself in your bedroom crying all night.
You didn’t attend class the next day, you decided to drive to Changmin’s apartment to apologize and explain everything to him. But when you’re sure you saw his car parked on the parking lot, you went up to his floor and rang his bell. When he didn’t answer the first four time you called him, you knock his door on repeat. But his neighbor came out instead greeting you.
“He went to his parents just now.” He said.
“But his car is downstairs.” You force a smile when you felt yourself frowning to his answer. You’re still being denial. Your sleep deprivation didn’t help much when you’re at your most fragile state that you almost broke down at every mention of his name. But you fight it because you need to find him.
“Yeah he usually take the train whenever he head to his parents. I think you can still catch him now.” He said again watching his watch and you thanked him before rushing to the station looking for him franticly. You know you’re on the right place as his neighbor told you. You force yourself to run everywhere looking at people faces even your energy was drained. You stop to catch your breath almost losing hope after running here and there for a few round. You straightens your back when you sense someone was looking at you. When you look up inside the train, you saw him looking at you without any emotion. As if you’re a stranger to him, you were holding back another sets of tear mouthing ‘please’ to him, begging for him to stay, to listen to you just once. You began to panic when the train door was closing and started moving.
“No. No please. Changmin-ah.” You call as you break down again chasing after him banging the side of the train and running dangerously close to the train. While him, he just looked away from you.
“Changmin please.” You pleaded before stop when you reach the end of the platform. You fall to your knee crying shamelessly ignoring the people who was looking at you. You prayed so hard that you have enough courage to just jump on the railways and kill yourself.
You cried and cried and cried as if no one was watching you until you feel someone wraps a jacket over your shoulder and you look up to see Kevin who was looking back at you.
Kevin
It was during class when he got a call from Jaehyun asking him to pick her up at the station that he had to rush out and take a taxi and sprint to the platform where he saw she was still crying on her knees hands covering her face. He took off his jacket and walked to her covering her petite body and it break him when she look up to him with her swollen eyes from crying. He pulls her up and keep her face covered because some people already taking video of her and take her away from the crowd.
“What are you doing there?” He asked after they both arrives at his shared apartment with Jacob and Eric. He help her settles on the couch before sitting down next to her.
“I was trying to looking for Changmin.” She said in between her sobs.  
“Was he there too? Why are you alone then?” He was irritated at Changmin for leaving her alone crying like that. But he can’t blame him either after what happened last night.
“He left. For good.” She cries harder at her own word and it hurts him too to see her like that. How he wish he could just told her about Jaehyun plans or told Jaehyun about her feeling on her behalf. He had nothing to say because he know how much she love Changmin even before they started dating. He pulls her body closer to him letting her cry on his shoulder.
“How did you know I was there?”
“Jaehyun was looking for Changmin too, but he saw you came out from Changmin’s apartment building and he followed your car. He wanted to comfort you, but he’s afraid that he’ll end up messing up your emotion more. So, he called me.” She didn’t react to his explanation but he know she was lost too. This is her first heartbreak and to put all the blame on her isn’t fair because it's like blaming her for being innocent. For being too nice not daring to reject Jaehyun because she was afraid, she’ll hurt him. But in the end, everyone is hurt.
“I’m sorry Kev, for everything I said last night.” He pat her head slowly.  
“Its fine.”
“I’m sorry for dragging you along with this shit that I made.”
“Hush. Just stop crying. You’ll find another one.” He know it was impossible for her because she’s kind of reserved whenever she is around strangers and it’s a miracle that Changmin could get through the thick wall that she have built up to separate her from others. Even Jaehyun who she have known for years couldn’t make it into her heart after years of trying.
While he himself was a special case, he met her during registration when he and she both came late and almost got into trouble if wasn’t for him who talked the dean out saving both asses from penalties. He’s been the only person she ever talked to and became best friend ever since. He helped her deal with her anti social even she didn’t change much, but he helped her out with gaining confidence while singing by forcing her to sing with his friend Jacob every weekend. He met Jaehyun through her when she constantly avoiding the guy by hiding behind his back and he had to make up tons of excuses for her to get away from him.
“I wont say that I know how you feel because it would be a lie. But lets just focus on this week. Its your long awaited solo. Lets focus solely on that. Okay?” He caress her hair gently and she nodded.
“You can sleep upstairs, Jacob and Eric will be back soon and I don’t want them to see you like this.”  
“Thank you Kevin. What would I do without you.” She lifts her head from his shoulder and he could feel his heart suddenly beating abnormally harder at the close proximate of her face with his chin that he could feel her breath tickles his skin.
He straightens his body up pushing her gently away from his shoulder to shake any feeling from forming inside him even he know it was always been there.
“You’ll live Y/N. I promise.” He looked into her red eyes and then to her red nose making him chuckle.
“What.” She whined adorably still so fragile.
“You look like a clown. Your nose.” He was about to poke it but stop himself from doing so afraid he would fall by such a simple gesture.
“You should get some rest.” He exhaled still looking at her wearing his jacket and she still look good even when she’s a mess and it hurts him to see her like that. He sent her to his room before decided to call Changmin himself. But all his calls goes straight to the voicemails.
A/N: This one a bit long but thank you anyway for reading it. Ahh Kevin, my second bias, i just couldn’t help to put some back story about him and how he’s been crushing on reader for quite sometimes. But that’s just it. He might be getting his own fics later. but i hope you enjoyed this one. Two more chapter will be shorter i promise. Thank you again.
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captainadwen · 4 years ago
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What to do when you spill hot chocolate on your laptop 101
last night i walked into the bathroom, saw a laptop on the mirror shelf and, being slightly confused as to why a laptop would be in the bathroom, asked it’s owner why her laptop was in the bathroom
“don’t ask,” she answered, looking more dead inside than usual
"okay,” I said, walked out of the bathroom, promptly forgot the entire thing, and went back to sleep
FLASH FORWARD TO HER TELLING ME WHAT HAPPENED
“so my laptop was here,” gesture to the area of the desk where a laptop would be, “and the mug of chocolate was there,” a bit to the side, “and my arm just went:” arm movement that knocks into the imaginary mug and tosses it straight onto the unfortunate laptop
oh no. big problem! time to clean it up and fix it and everything will be all right
its just that, like any reasonable person, she first cleaned up the mug (yes, the MUG), and left the laptop to the side, like a soggy metal marshmallow forgotten in the corner
then she came back, closed the laptop and wiped away the chocolate. as she picked it up, she saw some hot chocolate drip out of the laptop
so
she
shakes it
just gives it a nice old shake, as one does sensitive electronic innards covered in chocolate, until MOST of the chocolate stopped dripping
then, she sniffs it
“and my first thought was: oh no, i dont want my laptop to smell like chocolate!”
so she grabs the nearest perfumed item, which happens to be a window cleaner
“so, i grab my perfumed window cleaner and spray it.”
to make sure the perfume smell REALLY stuck she also rubbed it in with a paper towel. this new smelled pleased her. to make sure it SMELLED NICE EVERYWHERE, she sprayed perfumed window cleaner on her paper towel, scrunched it up to a point, and STUCK IT INSIDE THE PORT HOLES
because what's life without perfumed port holes
then, deciding she actually didn't want perfume residue on her laptop (also, it was still a bit covered in chocolate. only MOST of it got SHAKEN OFF), she took it into the bathroom for another round of cleaning
cue brief interlude in which i zombie walk in, ask her wtf is happening, and she answers me in slowly growing despair. the best part is that by her own admission, she was only slightly concerned at this point in time
SLIghtLY COncERnED
after i leave her to her laptop-saving-strategies, she resumes what she was doing before: wetting a towel, RUBBING IT ALL OVER HER LAPTOP, and then clearing THAT off with paper towels
maybe the paper would give a nice smell too???
SATISFIED, she returns to her room and opens up her laptop.
now, for added context, the laptop had NEVER BEEN TURNED OFF. she only closed it. as laptops are wont to do, this put it into sleep mode. as laptops are also wont to do after being opened while STILL TURNED ON, it tried to boot up
the screen appeared bright and shining. hope was high in the air. night had passed (literally), a new day had come (also literally, almost)
then it flickered and sputtered out
“oh no,” thought this unidentifiable person i share living space with, “maybe something is wrong.”
MAYBE SOMETHING IS WRONG
a bit concerned, she grabs her phone and googles what to do when you spill hot chocolate all over your sensitive macbook
step 1: clean the laptop immediately
“oh no,” she thought, “maybe there’s something... really wrong.”
step 2: dont shake the laptop
“oh no,” she thought, “something is definitely wrong. EVERYTHING IS WRONG.”
step 3: turn off laptop, remove battery
“AHA! FINALLY SOMETHING I CAN DO RIGHT AFTER... doing... everything wrong.”
excEPT, she can’t figure out how to take out the battery, so she closes it again, puts it onTOP OF HER TALLEST CLOSET, and falls into a fretful sleep
the clock reads: 3 am.
now, for added misfortune to her morning, not an hour later the fire alarms wake our entire building. she probably wouldn’t have even woken up except i shouted at her door until she went “wuh? what’s that noise” and i screamed “THE FIRE ALARM”  at her. we go out into the beautiful 4 am sky, which is dark and also IN THE MIDDLE OF A FRIGID DOWNPOUR OF RAIN
thankfully, it wasn’t a real fire. just a slight malfunction that REPEATED ITSELF FIVE MINUTES AFTER WE WENT BACK INSIDE, just as she had climbed into her bed again. back to the rain it was, and we only go back to sleep at 5:30 am. total sleep count for her at this moment: 30 minutes to 1 hour.
the next time i see her she’s getting up for lunch and eventually tells us the entire sordid tale, which was far more hilarious in her retelling and our incredulous hysteric commentary than this post. i nearly choked several times and had to stop eating until it was over.
curious about the laptop, i ask to see it to check if maybe i could figure out how to open it and get the battery out. no good. she opens it to put it upside down. the screen flickers on, because again, SHE NEVER TURNED IT OFF
we turn it off
she sniffs the keyboard and groans
“what is it,” i ask
it still smelled like chocolate
----
(tldr; this is a foolproof guide to making sure your laptop is a-okay after you spill got chocolate on it, with an excellent example provided by [person whose identity i have been forbidden from mentioning])
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insideanarmymind · 6 years ago
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Remembering Sunday - Part Three
I   II   IV  V  VI
Lovelies, i understand i haven’t been properly updating and i apologize therefore i made this part extra long! I hope you enjoy it. 
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"Excuse me, I'm what?" Those were the first words that came out of my mouth until a flashback flooded my mind. It was one of the nights when Yoongi stayed late in his studio  and I went to go visit him. Him being in one of his moods of not wanting to leave his studio until he has finished what he was currently working on. Yet, I didn’t want to leave because I was in one of my own moods so I climbed onto his lap and then…
That was little over two whole months ago, I can't be. I mentally try to remember when was my last period and I audibly gasp.
I feel Sungmin's hand on my back rubbing circles on my back, "It seems that you are currently ten weeks pregnant, you are still in the first trimester so there are still options for you take if you feel like you are not ready for the child. Which you, of course, have to speak about it with the father," Dr. Lee expands as she refers to Sungmin as the father.
"Oh, I'm just a close friend of hers," Sungmin clarifies as I'm still looking at a poster of the wall.
Dr. Lee nods, "I understand that this is a lot of information to take in, Ms. Y/L/N.  As you may know since you have been in Korea for a while, terminating a pregnancy is illegal but adoption is acceptable. Most pregnant women know they are pregnant after only a few weeks, but you didn’t which is completely fine. Yet, you have missed out on a lot of appointments with an obstetrician which are very important for you and the baby's health. I will go ahead and assign a very successful obstetrician for you and he will contact you once I give him your information. If you are interested with going the adoption route then your OB-GYN will give you more insight about that."
Throughout that whole speech I kept my head down trying so hard to wrap my head around this new life-changing information. But I try to still listen to Dr. Lee, it didn’t work out. Oh well, I know Sungmin is listening for me.
"Ms. Y/L/N?" I turn to Dr. Lee finally giving her my undivided attention now, "I get you might be scared and freaking out, but just know that there are people around you that care about you." She points towards Sungmin, "They will help you in any way possible, I don’t know the whole story about your pregnancy but here is a little advice from one mother to another. There is a living being inside you, now matter what you will do everything in your power to protect him/her. Listen to your instincts, if you feel like something is wrong and you need to correct it for your child then do it. Don't doubt yourself, as I have seen you are one intellectual person so I know you will do whatever you feel right is for your baby."
I couldn’t help but start crying after hearing her advise for me, Sungmin hugs me close to him and continues with the back rubbing, "You know that Connor and I will always be here for you no matter what. But you better make us the baby's god parents, just saying." With me still crying, I couldn’t resist the laugh that leaves my mouth as I hear what he just said.
"Thank you for everything, both of you," I was able to reply as I try to wipe my tears away.
After leaving the Health Center, Sungmin and I left to go back home. Sungmin thankfully didn’t push me to talk about it. When arriving to the house, I went straight to my bed, acting like if I hide from the world. My problems will magically disappear.
Sungmin came into my room to leave me an apple and some water, "I asked Dr. Lee about how you haven't really eaten much for the past couple of days since you basically throw up everything you eat. She says that she was like that too but eating apples helped her. I wont push you to eat it but if you want it, it will be right here."
He left the stuff on my bedside table and gave me a kiss on top of my head, "I will be downstairs probably watching a movie but if you need me just let me know.” 
Taking one step towards the door, I stay looking towards the window as I say "I need you." Not needing any more clarification, he climbs onto my bed and pulls into him as I start to sob into his chest.
Connor and Sungmin do not know anything about Yoongi, they just know I left my old place and needed a new place to stay so they opened up their house to me. I met Connor first though, a week after the breakup I trapped myself in the library every day when I had free time. He saw me reading The Book Thief and started a conversation with me about it since it was one of his favorite books, as well. If it weren't for Connor I would be going through this by myself but thankfully he was able to find the courage to talk to me.
"I used to live with my boyfriend for three years, it would have been four year a couple of weeks ago." I start opening up to Sungmin, "If only, he didn’t break up with me about a month or so ago. It hit me pretty hard, especially since he told me that he didn’t love me anymore. But I would like to think I'm a strong woman so I sucked it up and put my life back together without him or his friends or anything dealing with him in my life. I guess that has to change now." I'm still crying hard so most of this came out slowly and sloppily but I believe Sungmin is able to understand everything because his hold on me became tighter but not tight enough to hurt me. 
He replies, "You don't have to involve him, if you don't want to."
I start to shake my head but then I realize I'm kind of laying on his chest so there is no point, "I can't not tell him, its his child as well. He needs to make a decision about him/her as well. Don’t get me wrong, Sungmin. My ex was a good person he just-" I take a breath to steady myself "he just didn’t love me anymore. He didn’t cheat and he never treated me horribly. I have to tell him."
"Okay, I respect your decision. Just know, I will always be there for you in whatever you want. I know you need to decide if you want to keep the baby or not, I will back you up in whatever you decide. We'll make my office that I never use into a nursery and I, along with Connor, will spoil the hell out of the kid. The kid will never miss out on a thing because we will all be there for them." Sungmin reassures me, as I finally stop crying.
"Thank you, Sungmin. I know Connor and you will do anything for me, I am so thankful to know you both. I haven't decided on anything but tomorrow morning I'm going to meet with the father, to figure it out." I reply, getting up from my laying spot and reach out for the apple.
"Do you want me or Connor to go with you?" He asks as he gives me a concerned look.
I look into his eyes as I honestly answer, "I have to do this on my own, Sungmin. I hope you can understand."
At that point, we hear the front door open and slam shut as someone runs up the stairs toward my room. "Oh thank god!" Connor exclaims as he tries to catch his breath.
Once he is able to breath without heaving he practically scolds us, "I told you both to text me after your visit but did anyone text me? No, so guess how my day went. That's right, kids, it went horrible because I was so worried for my best friend that did not let me know what had happened. So I kept googling up what could possibly was wrong with you and you can just imagine how that went. I became a mess because I thought the worse for you. But then I became angry because my boyfriend and best friend couldn’t do this one thing that I asked so kindly-" 
"I'm ten weeks pregnant," I cut him off because knowing Connor, he will go off for hours and I do not want to hear him rant for hours. I rub my stomach to further prove my confession.
"What?" Connor's eyes went so wide that would normally made me laugh but with seriousness of the situation I stopped myself.
I launched into the explanation that I gave to Sungmin earlier to Connor but going into more detail of my and Yoongi's relationship. But never letting slip the name of Yoongi or what he does for a living because they might figure out exactly who he is which I don’t want it to be known by them just yet. After the explanation, Connor gave me the same reassurance that Sungmin gave me and it just melted my heart knowing that these two people will care for me unconditionally.
I   II   IV  V  VI
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fatesinthenight · 7 years ago
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Google's Laugh (part 3)
"Serious question right now." You look at Google intensely.
"By all means ask." Google said calmly.
You take a deep breath and look up at him. "So best girl... Mercy or Mei."
Google looks at you and sighs. "You know I really don't understand the concept of that but if I were to go by stats I believe that it is Mercy."
"Come on everyone wants her. My sweet Mei needs more love." You are very serious about this.
As you wait for your drink you have been talking nonstop about gaming. Google talks very calmly and carefully while you have been going on like crazy. You soon realize that you have been the one talking the most and are being very energetic. You start to get self conscious about it and stop talking.
"Sorry I'm talking to much." You blush.
"That is fine. Someone has to keep the conversation going. I am not one to pick any lively topics." Google tells you.
"You sure about that? Cant you just do a search and find something?" You ask.
"Unless you want to talk about politics and the latest gossip on the Kardations then keep going." Google's eyes flashed blue as he did a search on the news.
"Well then I hope you enjoy my annoying constant talking." You say sarcastically.
"I don't think it is annoying." Google assures you.
"Now you are just being too nice." You laugh.
"No I mean it. Your chatter is quite entertaining." Google said softly.
You look at him shy. He is not smiling really he looks serious but even so you feel your heart beat a little faster. "Umm thanks."
The waiter brings you your Pepsi and looks at Google. "Are you sure I can't get you anything to drink?"
"No thank you I will be fine." Google responds.
"So are you two ready to order?" The waiter asks.
Back in the van the Googles are keeping an eye on the date. Oliver still looks nervous about it, still thinking that they should have left Google alone. Red and green on the other hand are watching the date unfold very eagerly. Red and Green watch the monitor as they snack on chips.
"You two are actually eating?" Oliver looks at them amused.
"I know we don't usually have to eat but I am getting anxious watching this and it makes me want to eat something." Red's mouth is full.
"It is called stress eating and I can't believe I am also doing it too." Green admits but he still keeps taking in some chips. "Red we are almost out."
"Don't worry I have four more bags." Red points at the stash beside him. "We have a good amount of rations to last. I got you some cookies Oliver if you want."
"Ummm thank you Red but I am fine right now." Yellow smiles at Red. They see you as you continue talking and listen in as you ask Google questions.
"So can you really not have water?" You ask.
"I can not. It will damage my core." He answers.
"But you can eat?" You are curious about that.
"Yes I can. I do have a digestive track of a human and taste buds. It came with the upgrade. However I cant not have liquids. Probably something the upgrade could have added but alas. More ironically I do have the function to cry." Google is amused looking at your amazed expression.
"You can cry? Really?" You are amazed.
"Indeed I can." Google sighs. "I don't know why that came with the upgrade. Maybe to make me seem more human even if I am a droid."
"Have you ever cried before?" You look at Google curious.
"No I haven't to be completely honest." He admits.
"Not even for a sad movie? Stubbed your toe? Looking at a cute baby panda roll over." You are very passionate about the panda.
"Films no, Bim cries enough for everyone and Oliver. I do experience pain but not to the extent of tears. As for pandas though they may be quite adorable I don't understand why I would shed a tear for one." Google lifts an eyebrow.
"Have you seen one! How can you not shed a tear for that, its that cute!" You are appalled and gasp dramatically. "But really you haven't?"
"No. I have had no reason to." Google shrugs.
"I see. Well who knows it can happen sooner than you think." You tilt your head playfully.
"Maybe so." Google said calmly.
Both of your food comes and you get the ketchup and squirt it all over your fries. When Google takes it he squirts it on the side. You notice and laugh, Google doesn't understand why but just lets you have your fun. He begins to feel something. He doesn't understand it but it is a gut feeling that is making him not want to eat anymore. When you laugh at something random or act intensely about something he does not understand it makes something inside of him jump. He can not pinpoint it. As you are focusing on your burger he does a quick search at his feelings. He reads through his findings sorting them out. It said how to know you have a crush on someone. Google looks at this and realizes the area he is feeling this unusual sensation at is his core. He does not have a actual heart but his core is practically it. He thinks to himself, Are these feeling of being attracted to someone?
"Are you ok Google?" You look up from your food so see Google looking down at the table looking confused, something you didn't think you would see.
"I... I don't know." Google can't even believe he actually said that. He moves out of the booth. "Will you excuse me for a moment. I need to check on something."
"Ok... You sure your fine?" You are getting concerned.
"I just need to check something. I will be back." Google walks outside the building and looks out into the parking lot.
"What do think is wrong?" Oliver looks at the monitor worried as Google leaves you.
"Ughhhh I don't this." Red is stuffing more chips into his mouth. He looks down and grabs the third bag or chips.
"Blue is never this way. We should go there and do something." Green reaches into the chip bag Red has and come out with nothing. "Red! That's the third bag!"
"Sorry. I cant help it." Red already is half way through the fourth bag of chips.
"No lets give him a chance to figure this out on his own. He can do it." Oliver is being positive but deep down he does want to help his big brother.
"Oliver I know you want to give him space but this is Google we are talking about. He doesn't understand feelings as much as we do. Even if he tells us not to help him with it because he is the one who knows everything, this is one thing that boggles his mind." Green sighs. "He is a proud guy but even he needs help even if he doesn't ask for it."
Oliver thinks about it for a moment then nods. "Ok but them wont he realize we followed him he and are spying on him."
"Right so we need to be sneaky about it. But how-" Green is interrupted as the siding door of the van opens fast.
"I knew it was you three." Google looks at his brothers. "I picked up your signal to the camera feed and knew it was you."
The brothers all blush caught red handed. Red has a cookie in his mouth and holds his hands up in surrender. Green looks surprised and tries to think of a good excuse. Oliver is as always the honest one.
"I'm sorry Blue. We just wanted to see if you were going to be ok. We wanted to help you if you needed anything. I know this is still new for you and you may not understand what's going on but we are here if you need us. I'm still sorry we-" Oliver gets cut off.
"I already knew you three would do this. It is fine. Now I need your help Yellow." Google looks serious. Oliver begins to feel nervous, Google only calls him Yellow when he is being serious about something. Google takes a breath and looks at Oliver with a straight face. "Teach me about feelings of love."
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pokefanbri · 4 years ago
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https://www.facebook.com/104057744428568/posts/156998459134496/?sfnsn=mo&d=n&vh=e
Fucking told him its a huge red flag if someone doesn't get rid of their apps. Multiple apps. Smh 😠 "oh yea i don't use them anymore" proceeds to use fb dating app" for real come on bro!
Some comments of the post:
"If you have to be checking up on your Partner then you shouldn't be with that person.. Idk how people have time for all this .. love yourself and know your worth.."
"If you're in a serious committed exclusive relationship you should not be on tinder. That's how I met my fiance and as soon as we said we are gf and bf and exclusive we both deleted it. Honestly if I was her I would have broken up with him too"
"a person also has a right to trust their gut feeling and check things out if something's not feeling right. Knowledge is power"
I've already discussed this but this news clip further validates my point of the topic, nothing more. I could call him out on hs bs further with detail, but I won't....yet, out of respect even though he probably doesn't deserve it. Til he reaches me & apologizes for everything he's done, i can say whatever tf I want & i could make a whole damn list.
Its the events of this what happened that started our downfall to begin with cuz i didn't trust him & he didn't even try to gain it back just left it as is when I could've turned my back right then & there, no apology either. Didnt apologize much actually, not even when i last saw him. But from then we spiraled & he got bored of me. I wasn't giving him what he wanted in whatever way & he wanted to find more. Closed himself off from the beginning & that created his boredom 😒
Would've had a blast together like a normal fucking couple if he was less closed off, & wouldn't have felt the need to do shit behind my back.
I'll stop talking about it for now, I have the anger & urge to keep going but I wont...actually no Screw it im pissed 😡 but ill keep it light. Its just not fair, I did so much for him but I was disrespected in different aspects of the whole relationship. Fuck! I've talked about the positives alot cuz i do love him..but the negatives are such bs too.
I want a good ass sincere apology for all of it so I can forgive him & move on, ive already apologized myself even though I dont think I should have to 😒. Didnt even give me a straight answer for the breakup, it was always a different excuse when I know he just wanted to pursue other women without me around im not fucking stupid. His own toxicity was too much even for himself & I was in the line of fire, to where i was the toxic one? No fuck that its unacceptable, he always lied when it came to covering his own ass.
For all i know he's watching me squirm & taking pleasure in all the pain I'm going through over him cuz he likes the attention. But no I actually don't think so on that one he's still good & ill give him credit where its due. But I gave him all the attention he wanted/needed & still wanted more from someone else. Really dude fucking really!?
Man up & own up to your mistakes, speak to me where I can actually hear ur voice speaking back to me with sincerity. We'll apologize together. Yea ull be pissed about this, but after u get over it & calm down. Give in & call me, granted when ur ready, & open up for once in your damn reserved life. Itll help us both with more closure & may even take a weight off our shoulders if we just talk it out, no arguing...since we're done there's no point anyway..a friendly non judgment zone cuz idc, i won't think of u any less.
U confused me during & especially after the relationship cuz i didnt know who u really were, i know the good cuz that's what u allowed me to see, ive accepted the bad that I knew already & from what ive learned...i accepted u regardless.
I always forgave u & not cuz im passive, cuz forgiveness is what the Bible teaches.. ive forgiven u & myself the best i could especially with the last things ive showed u, (accept this part cuz im pissed rn & standing up for myself, ill delete eventually maybe if u ask cuz nobody wants to be seen any less of a person. but I can make it alot worse, calling me the mistake was the worst thing u ever said to me & pointing out your faults so u can be better throughout the relationship was my only toxicity to u) we actually never really fought except the 1 time, just argued a tiny bit rarely about little things.
Ive tried using every ounce of my courage to show u how much im sorry for any wrong ive done. but its up to u now to make things right. U know me, ive always said that u can talk to me about anything. I want to be able to trust again & move on whilst staying friends. What else do u have to lose, might even have a great heart to heart convo dude to dudet
Everything ive ever said up to this point lies all my Questions. But here's most of the list, we both were equally in control of the relationship. Maybe u didn't want me to? But doing everything I had to for myself & the household, what u & ur parents wanted of me & just me being me cuz i had to, u had your own part to play & did provide...but did u actually not want me to cater to u if it were a sign u were lazy or something? Like did u not feel worthy of me? What is it u think is my "addicting personality" that isn't fixable on the surface? What is it really that u didnt like about me? This is why i don't have closure, u left me like this, confused as well as wanting more since u held back so much. Was that on purpose to give me even more false hope & want me to pine over u? Did u ever or do u still, love me at all? What did u want from me & out of the relationship, what was the purpose of it from ur perspective & why do u think i couldn't give that to u? What did i lack that u felt compelled to not tell me so I could improve & vise versa so we both could improve? Why wouldn't u allow me to help u become a better man when (I shouldnt have to btw), its exactly what u wanted but maybe didnt see it? Do u realize your own faults even as u do them? Lol. Like i genuinely want to know as much as the good ive seen, cuz to be better the more open of a person u are the more u understand yourself too.
Unless claiming u want to be a better man is part of ur alluring charm in love bombing process to land a caring girl on purpose lol...god I hope not, that would just mean u rinse & repeat like a for real narcissist 🤔 seriously tho look into that im not even kidding, im asking cuz i care. Im pissed now but 1 thing is that im trying to not put ur behavior against u cuz maybe u can't help it, its just the way u are, all ive seen & experienced points to maybe 50% of u lol. Ive always suspected narcissism, a real psych problem that might be worth looking into. But yea 1 of the reasons especially why im so forgiving & trying not to put it against u, why i still care despite u being a dick lol. I chose to look past it, all the time & up to now cuz I understand what its like to have psychological ailments. The worst part about it is most dont realize it, so i encourage u to do some research & self reflection & admitting it to urself are the 1st steps. Okay? There's different kinds & levels to being 1 too, i found that fascinating. bryan is definitely a different type, ur more lighter than that...definitely not the worst which is the physical harm type. Trust me its worth finding out more about yourself, just dont use it to ur advantage in a bad way but i trust u to do right & grow. Not sure a discarded supply (ie me) has ever tried telling a narcy what they might be for the benefit of their own self awareness 🤔,idk if its ever been done, but theres a 1st for everything? U can find alot on it in quora digest alone but Google is also ur friend.
You always were worth every effort of mine to help u in any way to be happy, & i was most happy when u were. U mean alot to me still, its the effect u had on me, I was under ur spell lol its hard to rid myself of it still, not sure when it'll pass. I chose to see it as a gift rather than a curse, that ur effect on me is still so strong when I shouldn't give a damn. If u really are a narcy, then I understand & don't put alot against u cuz its just the way u are & i need to accept it, but if it somehow helps u to help yourself cuz of it, then whats the harm? But, even in doing this or having my socials public for u...maybe just feeds into what u want...i still dont care, I want u to see how bad or good im doing without u in my life, so u know im okay at least. U promised friendship, least I can do is allow u to keep tabs on me too we spoke of, on my end of things.
The 18th of June was the last time i saw u. It'll soon be a month ago in about a week & a 1/2 & your birthday would mark 2 months. Cant believe we couldn't even last through to that 😔
Mark my words playa I will be contacting u on that day lol. Can't ghost your homie forever sweetie
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olivieraa · 8 years ago
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Since you always have so strong feministic values, I'd like to ask how you think Yuri on Ice handles the female characters ? I know that the main focus is on the males but I would love to hear your opinion on that since I really like the females Yoi has given us
Ok, this is gonna be long, so I need to put forward two things first.
1. I hate back and forth questions. They usually result in confusion from both parties, a possible argument ensues and nothing gets solved. Which is why I give a LOT of background to my answers to questions and go into as much detail as I can.
Some may think “90% of this was unnecessary” but I honestly believe if I’d given you a straight up short 5 line paragraph as an answer, then the response would be “but how” and “why would you” and “so where did that” and so to save time, I wrote out my answer to your question around the end, but to back it UP is everything else I have written here, which is pretty long.
2. I get into arguments pretty much daily. If you don’t know how DONE I am with people at this point, then you don’t know me very well. A lot of men people try to make up excuses as to why they don’t see an anime as sexist or as pandering to a male audience and then also try to claim women get just as much. Also its not just anime. TV shows, movies, comic books, heck even music. And something can just be so blatantly sexist, or racist or homophobic, there’s no other way to describe them, but idiots will STILL go on the defense.
Most of my anime arguments were on Disqus, but I haven’t posted on there in a while so there’s no recent examples I can give to show how ignorant and annoying and defensive these fans are. But they’re ALL over my blog. Somewhere. There’s a shit ton. Mostly filed under the “ka” tag.
BUT as I said, its not just anime. And since I just finished Harry Potter recently, I’ve been watching HP related vids. This happened just yesterday. It was a “Harry Potter lovers and haters talk about–” video.
One girl in the video, a woc, said “If one more person or book wants to convince me that the “chosen one” is a basic white guy, I’m gonna slap them across the face.”
Her comment in the vid was all people could talk about.
I wont even bother saying what people tried to claim (and were wrong about), I’ll just show.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
One of the most obvious things about HP was how WHITE this series was.
This is what happens when straight, white idiots have opinions.
Tumblr media
And that’s what its like dealing with male anime fans who, if they were to choose 20 random animes out of a pile of 30, 20 of them will have girls/women being treated horribly in SOME form and they will DENY IT DOWN TO THE BONE. Or try to claim the reverse.
One argument I remember having was the lack of MAIN female characters in anime in anything action related. No I take that back, in anything that did not involve her finding love.
Men are so stupid they see the word “lack” and think it means “never”, so they give you five examples to prove you wrong. And even if you say never, they take it so literally, so they present you with their five examples, and expect you to bow down for doing so much research in trying to find main female heroins.
What happened with this moron I was arguing with was, he could not come up with a list of non-romantic animes with a female character as the lead by himself. He instead wrote exactly that into Google and pulled a list off Reddit (cause I did it and found the exact same list).
What made it even funnier is he didn’t bother looking over the list. It was complete copy and paste.
How do I know?
He’d mention an anime, and then he’d mention the second season of the same anime.
Psycho Pass
Psycho Pass 2
He just fucking knew his list would look so short unless he put in the second or third season of the same fucking anime as if they’re fucking different. He did this several times. He also gave me fanservice animes (cause those REALLY help his case in proving strong female leads exist in animes where she’s not looking for romance… BUT HER TITS ARE OUT) and Ghibli movies, which is all people can ever really resort to. You can’t have a “strong female lead” list of animes without putting Ghibli in there to make it that little bit longer.
It is… tiresome. To deal with these moronic fools.
Now... very, very few animes manage to hit the nail on the head and be “almost perfect” (because no anime could ever actually be perfect). An anime with a good plot (whether its action, comedy, romance, whatever), have an even or almost even split between male and female characters, don’t put in ANY fanservice of one gender (female basically always) UNLESS you’re gonna do it to the other, and don’t prioritise the males in almost every way, you’d think would be BASICS.
You think it would be like the Bechdel test, something every single movie should pass, but most do not. And what happens is, especially if you’re a woke feminist, you come out of these movies and animes and you think, “Are women just not important? Are our bodies and looks all that people care about? Is that really all we’re seen as? Are we not HUMAN BEINGS worthy of RESPECT???”
My heart absolutely melted when I saw those little girls looking up at the female Ghosbusters cast with such awe, because that movie really REALLY fucking tried. I even remember one post mentioning all the great things about this movie and how it was great representation and one of the bullet points was literally just, “They eat. They eat without trying to be ladylike about it. They shove that shit in their mouth like normal girls you see every fucking day.”
Something as small as that made me realise, FUCK, women dont even EAT properly in movies or TV and when they do, they’re trying to be really polite, use a fork, use their dainty hands, get nothing all over their face (unless its a fat woman presented as comic relief), and they usually don’t eat anything they can just shove right in. You see dudes doing everything and anything INCLUDING stuffing their mouth, cause they could NEVER claim to not have representation when they get so fucking much of it.
So yeah, basics. Very few animes manage to hit the basics with female characters. And so I come out of animes complaining about the lack of basics and THEN some. Usually the extras will be “why the main character always gotta be a dude???” or “why is there NO body range with girls but lots with boys???” Even my ultimate faves (that hit the basics at least which are NECESSARY) couldn’t fulfill those wishes.
Durarara, FMAB, Inuyasha, Ushio to Tora
A lot of female fans of anime excuse anime and its incredibly obvious flaws and its a damn shame.
Me? Well its 600+ animes later and I’m kinda past the “Ive just stumbled across a few bad one’s” and “there’s OBVIOUSLY gonna be others catered to my specfic interests” stage. There’s not. Not many at least. Very few. Because anime is not MADE for men (neither are movies and tv shows and comics), but they are CATERED to a male audience. Males have always been a priority.
To add onto the stupidity of men again they CONSTANTLY contradict themselves.
You say; “Women and girls are treated really badly in anime. Excessive fanservice and sexualisation of female characters, whether they’re 11, 16 or 24 is everywhere. There’s barely any female characters IN most shows unless they’re there FOR that fanservice that these series so BADLY need. They’re usually useless, love interests, die for manpain. They’re all conventionally attractive and lack a personality. This includes mothers, while the dad can look ugly and its perfectly fine. Also what’s with the rapey shit constantly happening? And the violence? The fuck???”
Response 1 - Denial; “Women AREN’T treated badly in anime, you’re just seeing things. Who gets KILLED more, huh? Huh?! Men do! (without taking into account how many men are in said anime). Anime isn’t catered to men at all, there’s plenty of animes that do that to male characters!!!”
Response 2 - Agreement; “This is what men want so this is what sells!!!”
Mind you, this will be the exact same dude, but in two different arguments. He just doesn’t want to admit that he has it so damn good and women don’t. Its right there in his face, he knows it, but he’d rather argue with women (while knowing they’re right), because men like to win at everything. They like to talk to you like they have a phd in whatever it is you’re discussing.
It’s like that post I reblogged recently. A simple post that said “dogs > boys”. Obviously dudes got butthurt. I went onto the blog of the first (definitely not the only) dude who retaliated with “dogs > girls”, and guess what? His blog was filled with NOTHING but girls! Especially naked girls but girls nonetheless. They just get so butthurt so easily when women expose the truth and they’re like, “nO, you’re wrong cause I said so !1!!!”
Anyway, to focus on the main point of this post…
Anime is usually split up into shounen, seinen, shoujo, harem, horror, etc etc. I’m gonna push aside those genres (which by the name usually tells you who they’re catered to), and write out instead what I commonly see (without mentioning who they’re catered to). I’ll give examples too. And I’ma give a + for when I view something as a good thing and a - when its bad.
Anime that:
- doesn’t sexualise women (+) but has few women to actually sexualise regardless (-), because its a mostly male cast (-), so they’re not gonna get brownie points for not showing tit. This results in the women that are present as less relevant and treated with less importance (-). Unfortunately, despite all this, great plot (+), so the lack of representation for women is overlooked.
91 Days, ACCA, Ajin, Bungo Stray Dogs, Death Note, HxH, Joker Game, Kekkai Sensen, Kiseijuu, Kuroko no Basket, etc.
- DOES sexualise women (-), while also still having a mostly male unsexualised cast (-). Women, again, less important (obvious with the lack of them present, no?) (-), but unfortunately, plots are good (+), and so again, lack of representation of women AND their sexualisation is overlooked. Even by the female fanbase who bypass because the male characters can sometimes be drawn super pretty (so who even cares about the girls and their shit treatment anyway?)
Arslan Senki, K, Shokugeki no Souma, etc.
- has a somewhat equal amount of male and female characters (+), but only the female characters are sexualised (-). But because female characters EXIST, its fine, nothing to complain about regardless of sexualisation. At least they’re THERE, right? Also the male characters are still usually the main character/more important (-). Female fans bypass the flaws and claim “there’s worse treatment in OTHER animes”. Basically saying “Its not explicitly ecchi, so its perfectly fine.” Sometimes female fans can make up the majority of these fanbases (FT, Magi and Nanatsu being big one’s).
Amagi Brilliant Park, Ansatsu Kyoushitsu, Big Order, BNHA, Fairy Tail, Gangsta, Hai to Gensou no Grimgar, Hellsing, Magi, Nanatsu no Taizai, Noragami, etc.
- have a female mc!/female secondary mc but is more IMPORTANT than male mc (+). But oh look, she gets naked. Or has fanservice shots. (-) Either at one point, several points, or a lot. Regardless, its almost impossible for a nude scene to never exist if the mc is female.
Elfen Lied, Ghost in the Shell, Kill la Kill, Mirai Nikki, PASWG, etc.
- are just a shitload of ecchis and harems and their PURPOSE is to sexualise little girls/women and then try to throw a little bit of a plot in there, to which fans will then pretend that YEAH they totally like the naked chicks, but the plot is also awesome??? When it is never EVER anything that hasn’t been done before (-).
DanMachi, Highschool DxD, HOTD, Grisaia, etc.
- thinks its hitting the “equality” button on the head, but its not. A pretty even cast (+), they put women in actual clothes (omg trousers!) (+), nobody is going to have breasts twice the size of their head, and they’ll just be badass (+). But yo… if we’re not gonna sexualise these women, we need to have men knock them the fuck OUT at one/several point(s) (-). We gotta appeal to the masses! Equality without the sexualisation means beat women up! (-)
Attack on Titan, Deadman Wonderland, Death Parade, Psycho Pass, Soul Eater, Steins Gate, Tokyo;Ghoul, etc.
What does that even LEAVE you ask?
Romance.
Het or gay, as a pairing or a reverse harem, its romance nonetheless.
The romance genre is usually dominated by female writers, but male writers still have a lot of big romance titles to their name.
Here is a mix.
Reverse harem: Akatsuki no Yona, Dance with Devils, Ouran
Romance w female lead: Akagami, Kamisama Hajimemashita, Ookami Shoujo
Romance w female lead (+ other genres): Aoharu x Machine Gun, Vampire K
Romance w male lead: Air, Chuunibyou, Gekkan Shoujo, Shigatsu wa
Romance w male lead (+ other genres): Angel Beats, Masamune, Rakudai
If you really think about each of these animes, you can EASILY spot which one’s are written by men. Cause even in romance they find a way to sexualise just the female characters.
When romance is written by women, a GREAT majority of them have a male lead, there’s either no fanservice or fanservice for BOTH sides, and basically EVERYBODY is good looking. You can tell she’s at least TRYING. Just LOOK at AnY, even OLD MEN and OLD WOMEN are beautiful.
A male writer cannot treat both sides equally, even in romance, and its bad enough that it feels like every other genre (especially action) is overtaken by men UNLESS (when they THINK they’re trying) they either write their main female action hero as a badass but is ALSO presented with some fanservice fodder as well, or he wont sexualise them but have them beaten up by men (usually its a one sided fight).
And then like, I dont even wanna ADD shounen-ai/yaoi to this. It comes out once a year if even. Sometimes as a 2 episode OVA. Its just… not the same. At all. Its also HIGHLY censored. Harems, ecchis, fanservice shounen and hentais are not censored.
So have I missed anything? Yes I have. 
- a mostly male cast (-), but written and DRAWN in a way that appeals to women (+). Female characters may not be seen as important (-), but they’re not completely removed and serve some importance (+).
Should I be mad the female characters aren’t written to be AS important?
In my opinion - no.
Why?
One thing I purposefully left out entirely in all those above lists (because I was mentioning mostly male casts/a mix of the two/or a main female who is sexualised) are animes that feature a mostly FEMALE cast and VERY few dudes, and it can range from slice of life to “slice of life” to magical girl to idol pop groups.
I left them out because they TOO are still usually catered to a male audience (and they’re REALLY creepy, otakus to the extreme).
“So lemme get this straight,” you ask. “Animes with a mostly male cast are for men but animes with a mostly female cast are also for men? What?“
Look at the very first two bolded sections I made. You look at them, look at the way those series are written and the way the characters are drawn and you try and tell me those animes were written with women in mind.
They are ABSOLUTELY not.
If you need comparisons, compare them to these.
Binan Kouko, Hakkenden, Karneval, Nanbaka, Owari no Seraph, Servamp, etc.
Pink, sparkles, gay dialogue, muscles but not DBZ/JoJo muscles, hair flips, etc.
Yuri on Ice slides nicely in there too among other sports animes but I’ll get to that in a sec.
THEY are the types of animes, featuring a mostly male cast, that are made with women in mind and as I said already, they’ve only become more prominent in recent years.
Some dudes have actually FINALLY had to start questioning when they see a mostly male cast, “is this for US or for them?”. USUALLY you can tell by promo art and trailers (especially with something like Cheer Danshi), but Owari and Servamp turned out to be “super pretty boys being too ~gay~ with each other” and that’s why Owari has a lot of people men bashing it and rating it low on MAL. Because they were LIIIIED to.
So they’ve even had to question their sports animes. “Is this not made for us anymore???”
Sports animes do well among male fans, but nothing so major that they’ll throw out 5 of them per season, unlike ecchis and harems.
I think Japan has started copping on that women actually prefer sports animes over men, and so character designs have changed to make male characters prettier and more handsome, so it is now marketed to female fans moreso than male fans.
If you look at KnB, a female fanbase was NOT their intention (which is why I have it in the first bolded section). It’s a 2012 anime. Neither was Diamond no Ace, Hajime no Ippo, Eyeshield or Buzzer Beater, which are even older.
Then compare them to more recent sports animes.
All Out, Cheer Danshi, Free!, Prince of Stride, Yuri on Ice, Yowapeda, etc.
You can basically shove these up there with those pretty boy all male cast animes as well (tho still label them under the sports genre too).
Haikyuu is similar to KnB as well in which dudes actually like it too, but that was probably the last sports anime (2014) released as a “this is for everyone!” anime before the anime industry specifically started trying to cater to female audiences with their sports animes, especially when they saw what a hit Free! was. Free! changed the industry for the better. Free! which had way less fanservice than ANY anime catered to men and was more based around complex character development and emotions and feelings than anything else (tho this is APPARENTLY super degrading fanservice to guys because oh no they took their shirts off to go SWIMMING).
And these animes DON’T treat their few female characters like shit. There’s few but they’re still used. And given personaliity. They’re not discared. Gou is LOVED by the Free! fandom.
THAT BEING SAID. That all being said - It’s not progressive. We shouldn’t have to resort to this line of thinking. We shouldn’t be trying to scammer around for positives. We shouldn’t have to think we’re programmed to only want animes featuring pretty male characters with fleshed out personalities JUST BECAUSE men get the equivalent of that and more so we DESERVE the reverse.
I understand why Ansatsu and BNHA and Magi draw in female fans. Because, despite sexualisaing women, they don’t reach ECCHI levels, and the plots are good. Its the stories that draw female fans in mainly. You can’t HELP but enjoy the plot and the writing is done well enough to keep your attention, you just have to kind of… switch yourself off and ignore the fanservice to the best of your ability (too hard for me tho, its been 600 animes so I’m not settling for anything). Like I’m sure if I had been a hardcore fan of these animes before I was a feminist, then even as a feminist I still wouldn’t be able to stop loving them. Like YGO.. I can’t help but enjoy this boy show, I love the characters too much. But I’ll also call out the bullshit that degrades me. Constantly. I wont stand for it.
But that’s what female fans REALLY want. Great plot and story but also respect to us as women. It’s just… practically non-existent. So we get scraps and we deal. But it IS unfair.
And yes, the shipping happens but there’s more love for the plot and characters among the female fanbase than there are for the ships if its well written anime.  
So no, I really do not blame female fans, especially if they’re straight, for going head over heels for shows like Owari, where you’re really more into the SHIPS (mainly gay cause mostly male cast) than the plot because the plot isn’t actually THAT unique, but they’re given nothing else and don’t want to settle for ANYTHING that degrades women, then they HAVE to watch these shows and all when the plots aren’t outstanding, all you can really do is enjoy the full cast of pretty boys and ship them together.
You can’t help but go, “…Owari it is!” when given the choice between BNHA or Owari. One happens to degrade women, one happens to lack women but the boys are SUPER PRETTY so let’s ship them and enjoy ourselves like male fans do with EVERYTHING ELSE. At least there IS a plot??? Not the greatest but its THERE??? We really are scraping.
Yuri on Ice took everything next level. 
Mostly male cast? Check. Super pretty and at times - sexualised? Yes (tho sexualisation of male characters is EXTREMELY subtle compared to the shit female characters go through). A few female characters thrown in not treated like crap? Check. Queerbait (which unfortunately comes with the above 99% of the time)? No.
No? 
No.
We got LEGITIMATE gay representation with YOI.
What would have made YOI a top tier anime would be if the female characters WERE just as important and fleshed out. That would have made it perfection.
But unlike Owari and Nanbaka, these mostly male pretty boy animes. They’re not gonna end with a canon gay relationship. There’ll be fanservice moments and ultimately one of them will end up with a girl.
YOI is actually a gay anime. It is about gay men. So did they even HAVE to have female characters? No. But they did. A good few. And none of them were offensive anime stereotypes.
And it is much harder to get animes out there catered to a female audience where they say “No this anime will legitimately have gay scenes, they’re necessary.” than animes I mentioned above that are for women and just have some mild flirting in them.
So it was super hard for YOI to get greenlit because it said, “fuck it” to all this common repetitive bullshit in this industry.
What happens? It makes a shit ton of money and became the biggest anime of the year.
Tbh, tho the female characters weren’t as memorable as the male characters, they had more personality than a lot of female characters from animes where the cast is almost evenly split between male and female.
So I think YOI did a great job. An excellent job with other aspects, so we COULD have had more female characters and they COULD have been more important, but YOI was a great step.
And I know after all of that rambling on that I finally got to the point I was tryna make with YOI and I’m done with that now, but I just need to add in–
–I had NO idea what category to put Osomatsu-san into.
I don’t think the creators KNEW they’d appeal to a female fanbase more so than a male. Its a unique anime that belongs in its own category lmao
Also I feel like JoJo would go in here somewhere but Ive only seen the old one, not the new longer version, so I have no idea where to put that either :’D
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homersodyssey · 8 years ago
Text
f o o l  |  Solo ft. Snow
A call came near closing time at the Tribal Outfitter boutique. It was the sort that Homer believed she would quickly learn to forget. She said hello and received no reply. One more greeting, with meaning, that could reach out if a delay had interrupted or someone hard of hearing continued to wait on the other side. Still nothing...
The chunky pale landline phone made a click sound once Homer set it back in the cradle and proceeded to lock up and return home.
This would come to be a recurring oddity, spread out far between the last attempt to reach the mystery caller. No white noise or fax buzz from the other side. Homer quickly stopped following up after an initial address. She was kind, but not stupid and on more frantic afternoons in the shop this phone call became quite the nuisance however short lived.
It wasn’t till after Homer found signs of a shoplift that she finally gave to the mute on the other side. “This is Homer Klimt. How can I help you?” She followed up after the predictable silence lingered in the air. This had gone on since the start of winter. By now, the quiet felt like words; taunting. Like it was a joke. She didn’t want to be made a fool twice in one day. “Hello? ... I know you’re there, so jus--” The click rang out and this time it wasn’t from the land line cradle, but a short static that signified another being hanging up on her.
Of course she spoke to Sylvie about it, but there was little connection to her powers and the souls that lingered at Homer’s heels day by day. It was clear now that whoever had started this prank was living. Despite the girl’s frustration, she couldn’t deny her curiosity. Homer wanted to discover who was sending the calls.
She tried most every avenue she could think of or Google, but each attempt came up dry. Just as she grew sharp the caller became sloppy.
The last calls, Homer could hear chatter of people standing inside a room, music off of a speaker, or the echo of traffic that matched the sort traveling just outside the shop’s doors. She could have sworn that one time there was a clear sound of a single breath.
Hang up.
Homer still considered this all to be a practical joke... and she was tired of it. Though the girl wished to make a statement, demand an answer once again, she didn’t want to give this person the satisfaction. She would hang up, till the calls never came again.
- The evening that followed police reports of a hunter’s body being found at the far corners of town was when the center of Klamenth Falls went still. Homer locked up early. Once the main bolt clacked shut a familiar ring blared out just behind the counter. When she picked up she didn’t say a thing. Stretching her ear to listen, there was something faint in the distance. She knew this by heart, a song, but why couldn’t the singer and lyrics stick?
--ning to... I'll never be untrue Oh baby... Let's, let's stay together Lovin' you whether, whether Times are good or bad, happy or sad...
Heart sinking, Homer’s knees sank with it and she dragged down with the wall at her back while holding the speaker to her ear just as tight.
Why, why some people break up Then turn around and make up I just can't see... You'd never do that to me--
“Who are you...?” Homer asked without a chime of interest or anger. She stared out at her shop in the cool gray darkness lit up by moonlight and listened to the Motown playlist this lost soul had set up just for her.
The list went on for at least and hour. Homer had ended up on the hardwood floor, curled upon her side and just barely clinging onto consciousness. That’s why it all seemed more like a dream, when an unnatural baritone sound disrupted the final song and words scrambled between Smokey Robinson’s lyrics, “It will be alright, Homer.”
Click.
Homer stopped mentioning the experience to anyone though she couldn’t resist thinking about the incident for the few days that followed. Many of the tracks found their way into her own personal playlist and it was then she truly had to wonder if this was something no one should find amusing. Perhaps this stranger was a stalker. She should call the cops. Report it at least, but despite it all Homer began to feel less and less threatened by what had happened. The songs were her only link and so she sought out meaning, as long as she could, before the fire struck.
It has been a week since the terror. Homer’s shop was vandalized. Most windows broken and many items burned. The fire left marks on the flooring and walls though the building and everything inside still stood without trouble. She was in one piece and this wasn’t the end. Homer had friends, people who pointed her head in the right direction, but she hadn’t reflected on just how much she relied on only herself since she was a child till the damn phone rang one last time. Conflicted with so much, Homer clasped a hand over her face and let out a hoarse breath. The ringing didn’t stop as she let it hang there. After smudging a dampness off of her lash to comb the same hand through her wild hair, Homer bolted for the phone and with face forward pressed against the wall there.
“You told me it would be alright.
Are you one of them...? Are you responsible for this mess?
Say something! Fuck...”
She struck the wall with her fist.
Her demand wasn’t met. Not at first...
“I’m sorry.” It was that voice again. She hadn’t drempt of it.
Was this a confession? A hunter. Her heart was screaming now and she whipped her head aside out of exhilaration only to stick both eyes straight onward. Outside the bare window sill, across the street, upon a corner stood a man. His frame was something Homer found familiar, but at such a distance and in the nighttime she couldn’t be sure. They faced her from where he stood. This couldn’t be coincidence.
They hesitated to speak again and Homer didn’t dare interrupt. She’d gone cold yet perspired where she stood. “I know what I said, that’s why... I’m sorry for what happened to you and your store.”
She shook her head. Confused. “S-so you’re--”
“No, I’m not a hunter.” A very faint, dry, heartbreaking chuckle hummed through the line. “You’ve probably assumed so many things
I was scared at first, but--”
“Who are you?” Her voice wasn’t empty of emotion this time. She practically cried out the question. Still, it was reserved and sharp, only meant for one another.
It went quiet again, like the first day he’d called. A shiver edged his words, “I’m still fucking scared.” He said this as if it were amusing.
Homer waited and watched the figure from afar adjust where it stood before replying.
“It’s Snow.”
“... Snow?” She knew of the local artist of course, their interactions had been few and brief, but the fleeting nature of the moments before now began to make a lot more sense. But she still didn’t understand, he hadn’t given any clear explanation for this, “Why--”
“That’s the hard part...” The struggle was very clear in his tone. “You’ve been missing... for so long, but I could have stopped that.”
The color started to drain from Homer’s cheeks.
“From your first day... I could have stopped it.”
Their conjoined breaths created static. Homer covered her mouth and shut both eyes tight. Enough to trigger a headache.
“I created you.” Another hitch. “Appearances, I know, but... it’s true, that’s what I am. Your... your father.”
A curved knuckle fit its edge against and then between Homer’s lips and blunt front teeth. She wept in silence, stray tears, while her whole body tingled with numbing cold.
“I’m a failure, I know that...” Emotion rattled through the speaker she couldn’t rip from her ear. “and you made something so good. Great. Out of that chaos, kid, you’ve gotta understand.”
“It’s to--” Homer choked on her words, they were hardly audible.
“You’re everything we weren’t.
You’re so much better...”
“It’s too late.” The girl gasped out and her eyes were open wide once again. She stared at the figure who stood in place. “Twenty years... h-how many days... --you could have found me... but we’re strangers. A stranger... that’s all you made.
Homer felt lightheaded. She set a palm atop her head and let out a gentle sob. “I-it’s too late... I wont t-take another word from you. You cold hearted... monster.
N-never call--... never.”
Click.
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leroyanitaus · 5 years ago
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Banks that dont impose a character limit on international wire transfers. Do they exist?
Banks that dont impose a character limit on international wire transfers. Do they exist?
Bank of America and Chase are ones I’ve tried. Wells Fargo was also attempted, but they wont give me a straight answer and they say I have to go to a branch to do an international wire transfer. No.
I keep having this issue where wires sometimes get denied because the address or business name of the person I’m sending to winds up being too long. Googling doesnt return any other person with this…
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fanningplumbers · 5 years ago
Text
Banks that dont impose a character limit on international wire transfers. Do they exist?
Banks that dont impose a character limit on international wire transfers. Do they exist?
Bank of America and Chase are ones I've tried. Wells Fargo was also attempted, but they wont give me a straight answer and they say I have to go to a branch to do an international wire transfer. No.
I keep having this issue where wires sometimes get denied because the address or business name of the person I'm sending to winds up being too long. Googling doesnt return any other person with this…
View On WordPress
0 notes
topicprinter · 5 years ago
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Bank of America and Chase are ones I've tried. Wells Fargo was also attempted, but they wont give me a straight answer and they say I have to go to a branch to do an international wire transfer. No.I keep having this issue where wires sometimes get denied because the address or business name of the person I'm sending to winds up being too long. Googling doesnt return any other person with this issue, which is surprising since it seems like itd be a common one.
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kpsoa97xs-blog · 5 years ago
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what cars have cheap insurance for new drivers
what cars have cheap insurance for new drivers
what cars have cheap insurance for new drivers
BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :insurecostfinder.xyz
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