#I NEED HER RIGHT NPW

[reinafish]

Wait sINCE WHEN WAS THERE A NEO METAL SONIC FIGURE

[mamawasatesttube]

anyways. i think cassie needs to text tim having a minor meltdown in an ikea restroom because cissie asked her to come shopping for her new apartment with her and then looked at a bed and fluttered her eyelashes and asked if cassie would be down to come over and help her assemble furniture later. and cassie had a moment of butch euphoria so hard she panicked and ran to the restroom instead of actually answering.

tim, uniquely unhelpful: ??? ikea furniture isn't even that durable or heavy. you should take her to an actual home furnishings store and get some solid wood stuff instead of particle board. do you want a gift card i can get you one. there's a furniture outlet 3.6 miles from the ikea where you are. i feel like she'd appreciate an actual hardwood bed more, it can withstand way more of a beating cassie: UOU CANT JUST SAY THOSW WRODS TO ME RIGHT NPW????@?@?@@???@?!??!?!?!?!?!?@?#?#?@?

tim is trying so hard to be helpful via simply stating facts about furniture durability and usefulness. he is not being helpful

[momiamtired]

chapter 2 so they think im cringe. i will never be able to see my friends bc i will be able to leve canada onlt after 4 years bc of this stupid and random biometrics shit and i had only chance of meeting them this summer but now its all pointless bc of a random canada government decision. i want to pee so bad and this stupid american bitch is washing her ass for 2348493 hours with stupid pop childish music in the background gosh. i lost 700 dollars recently idk where or how i genuanly dont know its prob my roommate but im not sure so basically yeah and im reallt sensitive about losing money so yesterday was a fun day to me. my stupid mind is doing some crazy shit and tries to convince me to believe in karma or god idk basically its if i will think that everything will be bad then everything will be good but i should genuanly believe it all will be bad and i just go back n forth with this idea always going on on my minds. i have a couple of different templates of how this world from my mind' perspective works but im too tired to think ab it. ig every time i think that its just what it is its just how wolrd is and nobody is giving me a happy time after all of this is over as my mind always tries to constantly tell me i guess its just too painful for me. i want to believe that i will be happy in a short time. i want too. but every day i wake up and some awful shit happens to me. its awful to be extraverted and i dont have friends here. i hate this fucking bitch PLEASE leve i want to use toilet wtf is wrong with u. pleeeeaseee im all sweaty npw bc of how i want to pee. i noticed that they wash themselves so rarely here. idk why my roommate smells just awful and she is 22 and she never washes herself so at night when i have troubles sleeping i also need to smell her beatiful aromas and im gonna be silent ab her mouth like she never washes her teeth how can u have so many man and smell so awful and be so nasty. anyways i dont reallt know what to do? i lost my motivation to even live( but not to eatt i will never lose it i have ed) i just dont want to do anything to see anything to feel anything i just want to die and be reborn. i dont believe in reincarnation but being able to not feel anything is better than living how i live now. i never cry but i cry here really often. like a couple of times per weak? i never cry literally never. that bc my coping mechanism is trying to find a decision and i will fucking find this decision even if im gonna die but rn there is no decision there is nothing there is just finnish studying than good luck to being lucky for finding a place to live and a job and if u wont find a placce to stay u will have to sleep on a bed with a roommate who washes herself once per weak and stole ur only money. and even now my mind is trying to say to me that i will be fine and the situation will be better! but fuck u it wont be better and i know it because there is no fucking hope left here there is literallt nothing left no fucking move will make it better NOTHING will make it better. im a fucking psychology major wtf is wrong with me. i just cant believe how cruel the life is and how awful it is and how i just couldnt ever think it could get that bad. its just all of my failures they are so random and its not even my fault in any of those! and as i told u my mind again tries justify everything that is happening to me like no just think ab it!! no way it can be this awful right? no way this all could happen to u just like this and without a happy ending! yes it can and yes it happened and im tired of expecting something good to happen to me i just want to die pls why do i have parennts it would be so much easier. i would love to leave this hell and so study to europe but we already spent SO much money on only this first semester so i cant even imagine how can i justify going back home in my head, in front of my relatives. i hate myself

[chiefatticcreator]

Tifa continued to kiss him, his hands were getting more enthusiastic around her top, he stretched it so much, it eventually tore at the top giving him a clear view of her perfect breasts, she sighed "Oh well, enjoy the view but you owe me a new top!" she giggled...

"I will give you a top much better than that old one."

He would need an hour or so to get it, but that would be much better and show off her sexy body.

Right npw, however, he was groping them, squeezing her huge tits in his hands.

[alatussy]

i need a hug ,_,

[freehawaii]

SHE KNOWS THE SCORE

Many Voters, Hawaiian & Non-Hawaiian are asking me who I am voting for in the OHA Elections. 

I will be voting for Kelii Akina for OHA Trustee At-Large, Luana Alapa for OHA Trustee for Molokai and Lanakila Mangauil for OHA Trustee for Hawaii Island. I am voting for Kelii Akina because he has consistently been an advocate for accountability and transparency at OHA. He and Trustsee Hulu Lindsey from Maui have been the strongest voices raising OHA's ongoing mismanagement and inability to explain why millions of dollars to the tune of $8 million in Trust funds have been awarded by OHA for projects that auditors raised as red flags for waste, abuse and fraud! These are funds the auditors signaled as being unaccounted for (Kauai Taro Co-Op & Kanaʻiolowalu Sovereignty) and why OHA cannot respond to or justify the serious issues raised in 3 Financial Audits. We need Kelii to remain on the OHA Board to bring about transparency & accountability to protect the financial interests of our trust. 

I am voting for Luana Alapa as OHA Trustee from Molokai because she is the only candidate that is a small business woman and because of her lifelong commitment to building self-confidence in young Hawaiian women. I also know that Luana Alapa can work with everyone, we need her leadership & experience to stop the continuous in-fighting that has paralyzed OHA for years. If you check the record you will find that many of the serious accounting problems at OHA started under the leadership of Colette Machado, who has steadfastly refused to make public the records of significant Trust Funds for projects & programs that she directly ordered. 

I am voting for Lanakila Manguil for OHA Trustee Hawaii Island because he resides on Hawaii Island, is a Hawaiian Educator & Cultural Practitioner and has demonstrated his commitment to preserving our culture, our Wahi Pana (sacred places) and our Constitutional and Human Rights to Worship the Akua, maintain our cultural practices and preserve our Aina. 

Voting is the basis for exercising our power to designate & support our true leaders. Hawaiians voted during the Kingdom and still do npw. In this election, we have the opportunity to make change, to get accountability and to stop the waste, fraud, abuse and ineptitude at OHA. Let's not waste this chance to make change for ourselves, our ohana & our ʻāina. 

I ku mau mau! 

Mililani B. Trask

[lizzodorito]

quick vent

because i legit have no where else to put this sort of feeling and just.. writing it in a book or a doc just... isnt as cathartic. Hope this just fades into the void, please dont bother reading it.

Hey. screw proper grammar and spelling I just need to get thihis out.

my name is liz and hoenstly fuck this website because last time i actively used it for something other than mandolorian memes or sims mods/cc my ex boyfriend was fucking stalking me on it and catfishing me and comfort me by sending me those ask lists and i... i dunno if im over that. Fuck you Sven.

not the point, just wha t I have to think about every single damned time I find myself here no matter what.

I am so lonely. I dont have many friends at all and the ones I do are out to use me or not Get Into It with me, thouhg fair because im a shit load of a lot to deal with i guess. other friends i have are pretty backstabbing and they refuse to properly grow up and LIVE and THINK FOR OTHERS AND ALSO THINK FOR THEMSELVES WITHOUT IT HAVING TO BE DEFINED BY HOW PROUDLY TERRIBLE THEIR MENTAL HEALTH IS FUCK

And then i get shit for it

love being used guys hell yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah  no i dont i hate it so much literally when was the last time anyone loved me right outside of my family and even so its not like my parents treat me well. mother you may have improved drastically,  but similar to my self esteem, its still very much BELOW PAR and i hate having to witness both.

I am so lonely.

I go so long without saying any word sometimes, its a wonder i stil breath, although sometimes when i was young id forget to.

why is it that i get more depressed when i come back to the family home

does anyone else understand being family oriented to a family that really for the majority doesn’t treat you the same?

The voice in my head wont stop. it wont stop telling me all  the ways i have potentially fucked my budding friendships with my new friends isha and matt 

how am i a person who shares so little yet so much

BUT MY LORD THANK YOU these are people who... who are considerate and are processing what i am saying and are thinking of me

but how fucked up am i

and will that push them away

im often distasteful but all the same complex and layered and so useful and so interesting

and that’s why often enough it seems people dont put in the effort, or frankly, dont give a shit about me once i requrie effort, though their “care” for me beofre then was only for their own benefit.

im exhausted 

One of my best internet friends was raped and i was the one who revealed that to her and she just didnt realize it yet and i havent been able to fall asleep without thinking about it

i have needed to cry for over a week now and i haVent gotten to still i am so sad i am SO SAD

I am so charming yet cannot help being alone no matter how enjoyable i am for others to have around

Matt

He makes me question if im asexual

But I am only a human

porbably deifntieyl still asexual

but too much all the same 

Im just lonely and touch starved probably (more than usual to be clear) and want to be hugged and loved and he’s so smart and we talk for hoours and comfortably, for me, occupy eachothers’ space we talk for 

hours.

this is becoming poetry.

I feel like i am beginning to sound like a hobo johnson broken record

stop being poetic fuck off liz

he;s so 

I havent been hopeful like this in people for a long time

we went to a museum to support isha (she had to do a project that invovled socializing so ya know the inrovert crew (though i dont know fi matt considers himself one)) and we just were togeter (in rather close proximinity) just speaking in accents, partly hoping to excite the strangers crowding everywhere about “foriegners” being here at the exhibit... but i think it was mostly just for us. for our fun 

because voices is what we like to do

i love voice acitng 

he committed to it, i fell out of it more times than he did and he gets more specific with accents than i do

he likes what i do

he loves the characters and my many talents

he loves my writing

he wants me to join his dnd campaign over the summer with his friends

is it for me?

does he want... me

or just my character maggie that everyone loves

he wants me to join the campign he’s in npw with his friends, as he’s a player character and not a dm as he would be over the summer

he doesn’t quite get how lonely i am

i worry i made him and isha uncomfortable last night... i joked about actually being loved properly

he immediately looked at me strange, me not realizing the joke was taken as truth

“Liz, is there something you need to talk about?”

“Oh! Oh, well, um...” hi i come from an abusive family and you both dont realize how much it meant to me that you wanted me to come and are consitently telling me and thanking me for coming because... you’re telling me im good company and its been so long since i have had real friends or gone out with friends and ACTUALLY FULLY AND COMPLTELY HAD A GOOD TIME OH MY GOSH YOU DONT EVEN KNOW I AM SO SHY ABOUT ALL OF THIS BECAUSE HOLY FUCK I CANT EVEN ASK HOW I BECAME SUCH A BASKET CASE BECAUSE I ALREADY KNOW I ALRWADY KNOW I ALREADY KOW I ALRADY KNOW AND I HAVENT’ GOTTEN TO REALLY TELL ANYONE IN SO LONG WITHOUT THEM LEAVING ME 

its been so long since ive been understood by a peer

(hi my name is liz and i am weepign right now)

“No, not yet at least.”

*isha laughs and it joined by matt soon. I’m smiling comfortably. I genuinely have a soft, contented hope i might get to tell them at least some of it one day.*

“not yet at least! sorry matt you have to be at least a level 4 friend to learn the tragic backstory”

thank you isha for lightening the mood

thank you for making the joke so many people who gave less than a fuck about me got offeneded at and confused when i made it so often years ago.

my comment was laughed off, we continued to watch the critical role espidoe i had missed

soon it was just matt and i. isha was to bed.

just him and i, and i, like id been all night (concious but making the decision to pipe down and trust the people around me), was all curled up, very relaxed and off my posture, sinking into the couch. MAtt was always upright ish. sometimes hed sink a bit or rest his hips on their side curl a little rest his head, but not as intesely as i did

sometimes he’d scoot closer to me, sometimes hed scoot away. sometimes hed move his legs so our knees would touch. i dont mind (not because i was finding it romantic, im not twelve, i just am understadning of the small situation we are in and its a knee for crying out loud) i wonder if i was taking up too much space with the way i’d sit comfortaly. I wonder if he thought so.

i would be lying if i said i didnt imagine us actually having contact with eachother. cuddling platonically.. on multiple occassions.

I have an imagination that thinks of everything and so many scenarios all at once and all the time after all

i was comfortable with the idea but

it would be a bigger lie to say i wasnt absolutely and perfectly content wiht the way it did go.

i dont thiink i will ever know if he was comofrtable on that couch or more so if it was me he was comfortable or uncomfrtoable with. 

I will respect him to tell me.

he;s good at eyecontact and its comfrotable enoguh where i dont have to look away (it’s been a problem i never used to  have recently)

I’d peek up at him when he’d talk to me

i felt young again

when the stream was over he got up to leave.

i dont know if we daudled. dawdled? yep thats the word

i dont know if we did

we made small talk

shitty jokes that he declared wouldn’t be the last thing we said to eachother that evening

i agreed.

the last words that night were goodnights.

me with my raspy evening voice from a day full of talking and him with a look over the shoulder from the hall as the door closed behind him

he was obviosuly very slap happy sleepy as he was talking about the light not being too bright in the hall (to his happiness)

it was a nice night

when was the last time i went to bed so happy? thanking God over and over and praying for my friend i mention way earlier

i didnt even have to drown my insomnia with a youtube video

i just went to sleep

2 am

i hope the weather continues

- jaques cruzio, pink panther

now im just in bed

at the family home

not my dorm

fighting my depression (its been three hours, i was getting exhausted by 9:30 due to it) as i rest

i was curled in a ball, slumped and face planted, arms slumped when i decided i need to talk to someone, or say something mroe than what i vented to my little sister (small bits about how lonely i feel and how i worry ive fucked things up) hours ago

and here we are 

12:14 am

just some broken twenty something asexual with a mind that’s usually over sixty talking about the amazing people i met two weeks ago while in the background i think about the girl i used to be the boss of (online moderator work) and how she’s essentially in love with her idea of me and how i make her feel... and not just for me.

i am mysterious and cool and smart and hot and talented and useful to her.

I want to be complex and dedicated and helpful and pretty and so skilled and hardworking and wanted for me.

i want to  be considered and deserving and im hoping that isha, matt and my other two roommates can help start to fill that hole in my life

because, God, so far they have so much potential for it in my eyes

(so far)

thanks for listening, void.

actually feeling quite a bit better. the misery is still lingering, i wonder if i should cry more. But, i can breathe easier and my eyes dont feel dead. I just am tired and am prepared to enjoy things again.

proabbly will watch claire from BA make jelly beans.

or the Noel Miller guy isha told me about.

I dont know if it’s appropriate if i downloaded matt’s contact into my phone from when isha put us both in a groupchat together and i hope its not weird and i hope maybe he did the same, but by God i dont think i’ll be texting him first.

i like in person better.

with anyone.

always have

i have so much more on my mind

[thegreasygremlin]

honestly

i dont knoww if i can do this quadrant wwith saness

ivve hurt her i knoww i havve ivve seen the hurt ivve caused her

and i hate myself so fuckin much

so FUCKING much

she doesnt deservve to be treated like shes anythin like that bitch but my body reacts and then i crumble wwith it and its not fair to her and i wwish i could make it STOP

i wwish i could just turn off my fuckin pan sometimes so it cant do that anymore and no matter howw many times i tell myself shes not her it doesnt fuckin wwork my body keeps freakin out and i fuckin

i fucking hate it

and its not just her

its wwith zuanak and feferi too

i cant hug either a them wwithout goin shaky and rigid and most a the time i cant look either wwhich is problematic wwhen youre deaf and need to read body language and signs to communicate

saness needs someone wwho can lovve evvery part a her noww and not later and not make her ashamed a herself or hate herself

and if its just sollux

then its just sollux

i dont knoww howw much longer i can go knowing ive caused pain on her for how i keep stupidly reacting to things that dont even matter anymore because the fucking problem was taken care of

i love you so much saness and i never meant to hurt you i wish i could take it back and let you meet me at a time where im not so broken

im so sorry

ive never been more sprry in my lkife

i judt wabt todronwn right npw

[samanthasbarkss]

Why

Why is it that I feel so fucknig guilty for not giving my friend money

she owes me over £5000

i have signed off on three loans for her, most of which i ammaking the payments for her

and yet she still wants more

i have cut back on the thnigs i want

for her

and its not enough

she still wants more

when i needed more money i took on extra shifts. I put myself in danger at my burger kind job, by working with the pervy manager. (he got fired for how he acted,) I sold things on ebay, I did what I could.

And now I am in a regular job, not permanent, and I feel like i have tosave every penny, just in case my contract does not get renewed so i can pay off her loan if  idont have a job. She gets the benefits, i get the pain.

i have decided not to get a new laptop, a new bag, new clothes, new hair straighteners, all because she wants more money from me

I have two ill parents, one of whom also wants one of my kidneys, that i have to look out for

i am jsut fed up of working and then having her take everything

and i am fed up of being made to feel guilty when i get annoyed over all of this shit

its not right

and yes, i may be slightly tpsy right npw

but i think this is justified

[brianyololau]

9/7/22

So I failed my clinical. Professor failed me bc I didn’t turn in one nursing process worksheet on time. What a bitch. Thinking about her makes me contempt due to the fact that she held me back 6 months because of an assignment worth zero points that she could’ve accepted if she wanted to. Literally all of my previous professors didn’t care if the worksheets were late. This is worse than failing because I bombed my final. At least I could take it with some dignity knowing that it was my own lack of studying. This npw is a bruh moment for the professor, dean, and school. Fuck west coast. professor bejar deserves no respect. If this was her family member she would’ve seen it differently. Still need my degree doe.

The 2 weeks following the day I failed was rough. I forced myself to gym because I would’ve sulked about it at home. I worked out so hard I thought I almost puked. I remember hurting so bad I kept doing more sets to numb the pain and found myself looking up to the ceiling the day she failed me. For the rest of that week leading up to the grade appeal decision, I was working out w a different energy. Supersets became a normal part of my routine, and I spent 2-3 hrs at the gym. On one day, I spent 4 hrs due to the fact that I just didn’t wanna deal with the bullshit of the grade appeal yet.

Now that I’m on week 3 of this term, I feel more stable with my future again. Finals week and week 1, I just wanted to climb mt Everest if that’s what it took to get through the appeal process. Unfortunately, it didn’t work out.

During finals week, I had an incident with a nursing student which is a long story for later.

My goal for this post was to unravel how the interaction with my mom went after the appeal. The whole decision is something I came to accept even though it sucks, but how my mom reacted to it was much worse. This interaction actually happened on her birthday, and I completely forgot about it since I was so caught up with the grade appeal process. She and I came home at the same time that day, and she called me out for forgetting. I felt bad, so I offered to take her out to eat. She said never mind that, but what’s going on with the appeal?

I told her it’s a decision that I can’t change anymore, and I’d just have to move on. I told her I was gonna apply for 2 part time jobs in the meantime, and continue studying with my friends so that I could be twice as prepared moving forward.

She thought it was a good plan, and asked if I’ve applied to any places yet.

I said no. I think I need a few weeks to take a break before I start working because I was getting mentally drained and exhausted from everything I’ve had to deal with in nursing so far.

She immediately countered and said why can’t I work? I’m still in my early 20s while other people my are working their asses off making money. Yet, I’m not even done with school and saying I need a break.

When I heard that, I felt a mixture of shock and disappointment. I was shocked because of the lack of compassion my mom had by choosing to say that after I told her I was mentally tired. I was also disappointed because I secretly knew that that type of response was something to expect. I almost saw it coming beforehand but didn’t expect her to be so degrading. This was the first time where I couldn’t accept it anymore, and I repeated myself to her that I was tired, that I don’t feel happy, that I don’t know how to feel happy right now. I told her whenever I’m home, I don’t feel happy. I’m not going to pretend like everything’s okay at home. I complained that mom always has a temper, and is quick to give derogatory statements which makes me not want to talk to her. Grandma and grandpa are basically strangers. She’s sleeping in the living room, and grandpa treats her with no respect. Grandma accepts his treatment too which enables his behavior even more. Chu quy and her are the least romantic couple I’ve ever seen, and they don’t do things for fun together. I can’t pretend like this family is a happy family and that everything’s perfect at home. It’s not, and anyone who says otherwise is full of shit. Im annoyed saying this because I told grandpa one time that I was sad that he talks to grandma with no respect as if they she wasn’t his partner. He denied it saying they’re a loving couple who are lucky to have been together for this long. I thought his response was bullshit. They’ve been arguing with each other since I was a little kid and even went around the family telling everyone they were no longer husband and wife but acquaintances. That didn’t age well. That’s the one quality I hate: being in denial. This household is extremely good at that and suppressing conflicts as if pretending the problem isn’t there is going to do any good. Putting the problem aside and hoping it will just get washed away with the other million problems pushed aside doesn’t quite help either. If you really wanted to fix those problems, you would address them head on and do it together. That’s what makes a team. That’s what keeps a family.

Back to the story. I told her I don’t feel happy in life. She said of course you don’t feel happy with your life. You failed a class. That was your fault. Just retake the class later on, and don’t make the same mistake again. Then, she started talking about her experience at work. She said that she hates herself sometimes because she’s not good at english. Her bosses are fluent and get to work normal 9-5 jobs, but she gets paid by the clock. She has to leave for work at 3:30 am and doesn’t get home until 3/4. She said if she knew English, she wouldn’t have to live this kind of life, and she doesn’t want me to go through what she does.

I asked her that if she hates herself for that, then how can she be content with herself? She denied that she was unhappy and then proceeded to say that’s just life. Sometimes, there are things that suck, and you just have to deal with it.

Her answer didn’t seem have logic to me. How can you say you’re happy when you hate yourself at work and you think life sucks a lot? I told her I don’t believe life has to be that way because I know poor friends whose household is happy. She said that I don’t know that. They could be happy on the outside but self destructing on the inside. I told her I see it in the way my friends talk about their family at home. I can’t say the same. She repeated the same accusation. I asked her, if this is the case, then is every poor family doomed to have a terrible life? Poor people can’t be happy? She said not necessarily, but their life is already doomed to suck. I asked her if I gave her 4 million dollars and died right now, would she be happy then? She said no. I asked her why. She said because I wouldn’t have you. I said that if family is more valuable than money, then why am I not happy at home?

[thecorteztwins]

Drabble of Fabian starting to sink his hooks into a well-meaning young mutant. BTW, Amber/Bolt is not a canon character.

They were barely more than teens, this trio of would-be heroes. Mutants who had found each other via the Internet, coming together over their shared powers---all three were elementals, with the respective abilities of ice, fire, and lightning. And they’d tried to take on him, Fabian Cortez, thinking that would be enough. Such typical arrogance of those that nature had bestowed with innately offensive powers---they thought that was all they needed. Skill and smarts and experience counted for nothing in their eyes. At least, not until he turned it on them. Blown away in their first fight, their little crew had scattered. Being one man, Fabian could only pursue one---the leader. He had taken note during their fight of who was the surest---not the over-confident fire-blasting boy or the frazzled ice-generating blonde, but the stalwart brunette, the electrokinetic. She had, of all of them, shown the most sense, held it together best. Not saying much, but it counted for something. Even if she didn’t know it, she was the head of the group. And where the head went, the body would follow. Just as Fabian followed her now into the warehouse she had fled to, blowing the door off its hinges in her desperation to get in and escape him. What that could do to a human being... He didn’t see her when she stepped in, but he knew she was hiding, she couldn’t have reached the other door, all the way on the opposite end of the building, that fast. “I suppose this is the part where I taunt ‘come out come out little girl’ in some villainous sing-song pantomime,” he projected, his voice echoing in the vast storage space, “But actually, I’d like to speak with you. Npw, I know you’re thinking that’s an obvious trap to make you come out. You are probably readying one of your lightning balls right now to fire at me. And that’s fair enough. You’ve got no reason to trust me. Even if you do come out and stand too far away for me to hurt you with my powers, I’m holding a gun, I could simply fire at you.” He paused, then added, “Much like you could fire at me, right now. Fry me alive. You haven’t yet. I appreciate that. Now, I do not dare put down my gun. I am very afraid of you. I still want to speak, however. So here is what I am going to do.” He turned around, standing still, “I am going to turn my back, and count to ten. You can run the rest of the way to the door. If I don’t hear it open and shut when I finish counting, I’m going to assume you’ve agreed to a conversation, and I’ll continue speaking. You don’t have to come out, but I’d like it if you would respond, though that does risk giving away your position, I suppose.” He began to count, “Uno...duos...tres...” She decided faster than he thought she would, calling out accusingly, “What do you want? For us to join you? Fat chance! You’re like ISIS or Neo nazis, you preach genetic superiority, just like the humans!” “Alright, let’s break that down a bit,” said Fabian calmly, evenly, almost cordially, not turning around, “We’re not like ISIS. Their issue is religious, it has nothing to do with genetics. And as for that, yes, some of us do consider ourselves genetically superior---because the X-gene is a real thing and it gives us amazing powers that those without it do not have. There is absolutely nothing in any reputable science to validate the claims of white supremacy, but the difference in mutants and humans is more than skin-deep, as you know very well. Now, granted, its results are not always as beneficial as the abilities that you or I possess, so I suppose some mutants would certainly debate just how ‘superior’ they are merely to have purple skin or a tortoise-like appearance...” “So you admit it!” “Well, yes. But I think I gave a decent reason for it. It’s a little hard to say you’re the same as someone who can’t shoot lightning out of their hands, isn’t it? You could say you’re both ‘just people’ but it puts you in an entirely advantageous position over anyone in the room---even the six-foot-five man with a big gun. Now, as for another another flaw in your comparision---the Jews, the Roma, all those poor people that the Nazis attacked, they were never an actual threat to them. They never hurt the Nazis, they never hurt the German people...but humans very much have hurt mutants.” “So you think that gives you the right to kill them all?!” “Violence in retaliation is not the same as--” “Violence is violence!” her voice rose. His stayed quite calm, “A woman who kills her assailant in self-defense, she is then as guilty as he is?” He specified a woman in order to make an implication about just what sort of ‘assailant’ that he meant. He found that it delivered more of an emotional punch, one that gave even normally-stalwart pacifist pause to reconsider. And reconsider she must have, for she moved on to a new argument, “You make all mutants look bad. They’re just going to hurt more of us because of you and your bullshit.” “My dear girl, if someone is going to judge you by what some other mutants does, then they already hate mutants. They already think of you as a faceless mass monolith, if they judge some by the actions of others. By that very argument, you show there’s nothing you can do to change them, to please them, to convince them you’re good---no matter how good you are, someone’s always going to do something stupid or accidental with their powers, and then the blame comes back to you, like you just said. So why bother trying to be the model mutant? It won’t make you or anyone else safe. They will always find a reason to hate us, to hurt you, because they want to. A tyrant will always find a pretext for his tyranny.” “But that doesn’t mean you have to hurt people!” “Weren’t you going to hurt me? You and your friends ambushed me, not the other way around.” “That’s because you were--” “Hurting others?” For the the first time, Fabian cut her off,  “Aren’t the humans hurting others?” There was silence again, and he continued, “What’s your name, young woman?” “...Amber,” she said, “I mean, Bolt. I’m going by Bolt.” “Hello, Bolt,” he said, “I’m going to turn around. Is that alright with you?” “Yeah. Sure.” He did so, slowly, and found her standing several dozen feet away from him.  He took a step towards her, smiling, “I think we have much more to talk about.” END

[irenenorth]

New Post has been published on Irene North

New Post has been published on http://www.irenenorth.com/writings/2018/05/some-people-think-im-good-at-writing-and-gave-me-a-bunch-of-pieces-of-paper-that-say-so/

Some people think I'm good at writing and gave me a bunch of pieces of paper that say so

It’s awards season and I won some stuff from the Nebraska Press Association and the Nebraska Press Women organization. They think I’m good at making words sound nice and believe I know what I’m doing with a camera.

I do not write my articles for the Star-Herald to win awards. While I have assigned beats, I also cover things I think are interesting and/or that the public should be informed on. These include historical pieces and current events. Two of those stories won first place this year at the Nebraska Press Association’s Better Newspapers Contest.

I wrote an article about human trafficking and it won first place for “in-depth writing.” The phrase “there are more slaves today than at any other time in history” has always struck a chord with me. While human trafficking isn’t a huge problem, yet, in Scottsbluff, it does happen. It’s happening in Nebraska. It’s happening in America. I’m pleased the story got some recognition.

I am eternally grateful to Tristen Wecker for being so open about her past and allowing me to tell her story. It also won first place for “feature stories.” I told the story because childhood sexual assault is a big deal. It happens a lot. People still want to sweep it under the carpet and pretend it doesn’t happen. Winning first place means other people get it. Other people understand and recognize the importance of bringing these issues out of the darkness so we can change as a society.

I shared a first place award with Lead Copy Editor Candice Pederson for a photo page of the 2017 total solar eclipse at Agate Fossil Beds National Monument. I’ve turned the page into a photo so you can view it below.

I also received nine awards – three first place, four second place, one third place, and one honorable mention – at the Nebraska Press Women organization’s Professional Communications Contest.

This year, there were 200 entries from 22 entrants in 72 categories, the most of any NFPW affiliate. Of those, 58 first place entries have moved on to the national communications contest sponsored by the National Federation of Press Women.

I would have preferred to show the pdf of these articles because I think they have more impact, I have provided the online links so you can at least read them. The headlines are also sometimes changed online, creating confusion for anyone trying to find the story. These are the awards I received:

First place, enterprise reporting, “Good Vibrations” (Part 1 and Part 2). This was my favorite story of the year and I would have been happy if it had been the only winner. From the judge’s comments, “Story invoked admiration rather than sympathy for its subject, Robby Simmons. Good narrative and use of quotes. They keep the reader in the story and pull things along.”

First place, photgrapher-writer, “Awestruck at Agate” You see this page above.

First place, editorial/opinion, “Net Neutrality is Needed.”

Second place, news story, “A Helping Hand.” From the judge, “…your article has great relevance and emotional appeal. And it also brings the public’s attention to the tremendous contributions of these women that our military branches  obviously have ignored. It’s shameful and you know it. Yet, somehow you managed to describe the women’s frustrations and emotions without adding your own to the story. Your choice of quotes was excellent, showing the strength these veterans have drawn from each other.”

Second place, continuing coverage, for following the saga of PenAir. PenAir was a subpar choice for Scottsbluff. They had continued troubles, including constant pilot shortages, which led the Western Nebraska Regional Airport to seek, and receive, permission from the FAA to sever the contract and seek a new airline. although I wrote about a dozen articles of the ongoing saga, I was allowed to submit six of them for consideration.

Second place, feature story, “Stepping up, speaking out.” This story took first place at the NPA contest. From the NPW judge, “Very tough subject well-told. A sensitive look at a very sensitive topic. Glad to see this was on the front page. More stories such as this will help break down stereotypes of sexual abuse victims.” My only gripe is I seem to have had marks against me for the lack of bold face for the subhead, which I have no control over. In the end, it doesn’t matter. People read the story and liked it. Hopefully, it sparked a few conversations as well.

Second place, columns, for “Women’s March inspires millions” and “Making the right call on ethics.” Both columns were considered as one entry. From the judge, “I’ve read seven well-written entries, four of which should be winners….Like some of the Olympians edged out of the Gold by one-hundreth of a second, you are awarded the Silver….But if I had my way, there would have been a tie for first place. Your writing is second to none in this category.”

The judge also went a little off topic stating “I was heartened after reading your Women’s March column. I was surprised to find your strong voice in a red state such as Nebraska, vehemently challenging conservative legislators on issues of women’s rights, human rights, civil rights, LGBT rights, gun control and others right down the line. It was refreshing and hopeful to me to learn that strong newspaper women like you are talking a blue streak in red states.” It’s obvious my columns I entered struck a chord with the judge. All of the things the judge mentioned were from previous columns over the past couple of years and for that I am touched that a stranger wanted to read more of my stuff.

Third place, Photography and Graphics, “Fair Time.”

MacCormick Riesen holds his duck after competing in the 4-H poultry division at the 2017 Scotts Bluff County Fair.

Honorable Mention, History, two articles covering Nebraska’s 150th anniversary. Part 1 and Part 2. From the judge, “the articles you entered were so well done that they could be used as a textbook in Nebraska Classrooms. If I headed the Scottsbluff Public Library, I’d request copies for the section on Nebraska history. You did your research, then translated it into a long, but very readable text. It’s there for posterity and you should take pride in that.”

There were great comments from the judges, even on the entries where I didn’t place, which I liked. I also liked the constructive criticism where I could improve on each entry, including first place. I really like that kind of feedback and will definitely take it all to heart.

I don’t write for awards, but, damn, they sure do feel nice when you win.

[zorarka]

Voltron LD Lance thing that came to me just npw

Okay, so I’ve seen a lot of people talk about how oblivious Lance is when it comes to girls (and really anything). But honestly if there’s one thing Lance would ever understand about girls, it’s gotta be that lovely time of the month where everything is hell.

Yeah, I’m talking about Periods.

Seriously, out of all the males in the group, Lance would be the most understanding of this if Pidge ever started hers (Or in case of fanfiction and reader inserts, his s\o). I mean come on, with as many females in his family as it is, he’s probably got a pretty good idea on it. He’s probably use to having to take care of/bring stuff for/deal with his moody mother or sisters or cousins or aunts. 

He would probably stick with Pidge, or maybe even Allura because we don’t even know if Altean females have something like what we have or not, and keep a heating pad or something similar with him when they need it, and leave them alone when they wanted to be left alone. 

I mean, come on, He’d be right on top of that...... though he would not warn Keith at first. And then watch as he gets punched or kicked by both girls and laugh at his confused face before Shiro would tell him “Go warn him now before he get’s murdered next time.”