#I FOREVER DESPISE GRADUATION PARTIES

[datssokoolwhat]

ima take a dam break

Ever since school ended I have been going to graduation parties for FOUR DAYS 🗿

TWO DAYS WERE FINE BUT FOUR?

and they all ended somewhere around 1-2 in the morning 💀💀 I haven’t been able to have free time to draw the ending of Recreyo, what’s worse is that I was contributing for the parties, let me tell you it was hell making food for like 60-70 people, it’s that bad that I started to have horrible eye bags. IVE NEVER HAD EYEBAGS.

please.

It will take time for me to publish ending, so please be patient 😭.

now I will go and eat my ultra ULTIMATE SIGMA MEALS!! SKIBITY SLICERSS 🔥🔥🔥

[the-oblivious-writer]

Memories

Tara Carpenter x Reader

One-shot

Summary: Your relationship with Tara Carpenter became too much. But even when you cut the string loose, Tara still manages to come back each time

Warning(s): Swearing, no pronouns used, angst, toxic!tara, mentions of the Woodsborro killings (so brief mentions of death), drinking & intoxication (tara using alcohol as an outlet)

Notes: Starting off the holiday seasons with an angsty one

1/7 for Seven Days Of Christmas

After Woodsborro, nothing was the same. As much as you wanted it to be, it wasn’t. You and Tara started dating your sophomore year, and the two of you seemed to have it all planned out. Graduate, move in together, adopt a dog, and eventually get married. Although you both never said that last part to each other out loud, you both knew. 

But then the killings happened. The stabbings. The events that would forever change yours and Tara’s lives. The lives taken, the trauma, the heartbreak—it ruined your life. Two years ago, you couldn’t even fathom losing the woman you always thought you’d marry… but things change.

You and Tara needed each other and you were willing to stand there by her side no matter what. At least, that’s how it started out. 

Unfortunately, Tara had a more toxic outlet for everything that happened—alcohol. It seemed “liquid courage” was the only thing that helped her, other than you. Whenever she woke up in the middle of the night, tossing and turning from another nightmare, you would be there, holding her in your arms as you whispered sweet nothings into her ear and reassured her nobody was coming for her.

When you weren’t there, alcohol was. Drink after drink until she felt numb enough to go back to sleep. It’s predictable that this also meant she did the same with parties, going to one after the other. 

You hated seeing her like this, you couldn’t, not anymore. It was starting to become too much. It didn’t help that there was no predicting what side of Tara you were going to get whenever she was drunk. Some days you would get the sweet Tara you fell for, other times, you got a cruel version of her. A person you couldn’t even recognize.

She often got out of you confronting her about the issue, sweet talking her way each time or leaving in the middle of the conversation. One night, you tried confronting her about it once more. This time, not backing down. That happened to be the same night you broke things off. One moment, you’re sitting her down on the couch, the next, you’re storming out the door as you miss Tara’s regretful face—despising herself in that moment.

It’s been a couple months now. A couple months since you broke things off with Tara Carpenter. That's just about enough time for you to stop crying when you look at all the pictures of you and her. At first it was hard, leaving Tara like that. The pain you felt the first month was practically unbearable, but you knew it was necessary. You were both only hurting each other as time went on. You could now look back at the memories and recognize how you made the right decision. Now you kinda smile, you haven’t felt that in a while–

–It’s late, you hear the doorbell ringing as it pours outside. You walk over without thinking. You open the door to see Tara’s brown eyes at the entrance. 

“H–Hi. I just wanna talk,” she stammered a bit, looking at you.

No. No, things were starting to finally get better. Don’t ruin this for me, you pleaded in your mind. Oh, but you can’t turn away a wet dog.

“Come in…” You say timidly, moving to the side so she could enter. You don’t miss the falter in her step as she walks in.

“I’ve really missed you,” she started to speak. “And you know, I–” she tripped over a nearby table, you instantly squeezed your eyes shut for a moment. 

“Tara–”

“I never apologized,” she continued.

“So is this gonna be, like, a monthly thing now?” You suddenly ask, catching her off guard.

“What?”

“Well, you did this last month. Is this gonna be a recurring thing? Cause’ it feels like you showed up today just to ruin me…” You rolled your eyes when you saw the clueless look she wore. “Yeah, I expect too much. You were probably too drunk to even remember that night, just like you are tonight. If not, drunker.”

“No, no, Y/N, I just,” she walked up to you, holding your face in her hands. You couldn’t look her in the eye, tears threatening to fall at any moment as you felt her soft touch. “I never apologized…”

“You can apologize by staying in my memories and never showing up again,” you harshly spoke, your throat feeling tight as a single tear escaped your left eye. “We’re not good for each other,” you said; you knew it needed to be said. You knew she needed to hear it.

“Don’t leave me again, please,” she started crying, unable to hold it in anymore. You immediately felt a sharp pain in your chest when you saw her curl up on that ground as her lip quivered.

You want to put her in the past, ‘cause you’re traumatized. But she’s not letting you do that, 'cause tonight she’s all drunk in your kitchen, curled in the fetal position, too busy playing the victim to be listening to you when you say, "I wish that you would stay in my memories."

You can’t say goodbye if she stays there the whole night. It's hard to find an end to something that she keeps beginning—over and over again. 

The ending is always the same.

“You’re everything, Y/N. My everything,” Tara suddenly spoke from her spot on your kitchen floor.

“Dont…”

“And I’m sorry that I was such a shitty girlfriend,” she continued.

“Stop. Don’t ruin this for me. I was finally getting back on my feet.” 

She seemed to ignore your pleas as she added on. “I can’t—I can’t do this without you. You’re one of the best things that’s ever happened to me,” she let more tears roll down her cheeks.

A part of you wanted to believe her. A part of you did. Her words started to pull you in, until you remembered something important; she wasn’t going to remember a thing tomorrow. Her sweet nothings truly were nothing. They were just empty words she used in an attempt to keep you wrapped around her finger. You’ve been down this road before, and you refuse to go back down.

“And I can’t do this,” you finally said, the ‘this’ being your relationship with Tara.

She didn’t say a word. As predicted. 

“Since you’re already here, you can stay the night. I don’t want you being by yourself while under the influence. But, just for the night,” you told her, walking towards the cabinet.

She did stay the night; she ended up falling asleep on your couch. You looked down at her restful face, no longer able to hold it in. You rushed to the bathroom, closing the door before leaning over the sink as you cried with your head in your hands

Why couldn't she just stay in your memories?

-----------

A/N: srsly how tf is it december already 🧍🏻‍♀️

[songwriteoc]

The Sims 4 Challenge - The Pack(age) Challenge - 10 Gen Version

Ever wanted to explore other aspects of the game, but never had the will to do so? Well with this challenge… you can!

You can use whatever mod you want – it is a fun challenge that you can add your own twists to if you follow the guidelines given!

Recommended Settings:

-        Normal or Long (does not matter)

-        MCCC (for certain generations if needed, but you do not really need it)

-        Do NOT use the More Trait Slot Mod. I will update to add more traits once complete.

You do NOT need to stay with one pack for Create-a-Sim. I understand some of these may require other packs to fit the aesthetic :P

The generations will span over 10, however you can stop at ANY generation if you want to stop.

You can also skip a generation if:

1.    You really dislike the Expansion/Game Pack

2.    If you do not have the Expansion/Game Pack

Generation 1 – The Comedic Genius (Base Game)

You have always dreamed of becoming a comedian. Ever since that one knock, knock joke as a toddler. Your first sentence was even knock, knock! Your dream is become the best comedian in Willow Creek, Newcrest and/or Oasis Springs! You also wanted to create the best comedy household, wanting a large family full of kids to explore all the arts of comedy! Although you were not always down for marriage, you still wanted to act like a happy family even through the comedy home life.

Being raised in an orphanage and finally finding a home once you aged up into a young adult is where your story starts.

 -        Traits: Childish, Family-Orientated & Cheerful

-        Aspiration: Joke Star

-        Create Young Adult (YA) Sim of Any Gender!

-        Reach Lvl.10 of Entertainer Career (Comedian Branch)

-        Max. Comedy Skill

-        Max. Mischief Skill

-        Have a boyfriend/girlfriend, NEVER MARRY!

-        Have 3 to 4 Children.

 Generation 2 – A Serious Detective (Expansion Pack: Get to Work)

You hated the way your family made you do clown behaviour, forced to make jokes that did not even impress you, but made you mad! On a day like no other during high school, you helped a classmate get their money back from their bully, making you best friends till the end of time, with possibly more feelings later? (This is your choice). To get out of your home, you spent majority of your life of high school going to the gym on the weekends to get away from the chaotic life of a comedy home.

You never understood why your family gave you siblings, making you feel overwhelmed with the number of kids your parents naturally had, making you feel bad for the children put up for adoption and left alone with no parents.

-        Traits: Hot-Headed, Ambitious & Athletic

-        Aspiration: Professional Athlete

-        Generation starts as Young Adult (YA)

-        Reach Lvl.10 in Detective Career.

-        Have One Best Friend Forever

-        Max. Logic Skill

-        Max. Athletic Skill

-        Adopt One Child

Optional:

-        Somehow with science, become abducted by an alien. (if it leads to a alien pregnancy, that is fine!)

 Generation 3 – Cooking is the Heart (Game Pack: Dine Out)

As a child, you always enjoyed watching your parent cook you fabulous meals – making them as perfect as you could imagine. Even for your own birthday, you always asked for cookbooks to read upon them so you could learn the recipes to start your own restaurant and teach your children to cook and hopefully take over the restaurant empire you want to build for your family!

Due to how your parent raised you, you were always keen on marrying before woohoo, which is exactly what you will do!

As a Young Adult (YA) this is when your story starts.

 -        Traits: Foodie, Perfectionist & Creative

-        Aspiration: Successful Lineage

-        Generation Starts as Young Adult (YA)

-        Gain 5 Stars in your Restaurant!

-        Max. Cooking Skill

-        No Woohoo before Marriage!

-        Marry before you reach Adulthood!

-        Have 2 Children! (If triplets, that is fine too!)

Optional:

-        Max. Baking Skill (Requires Get to Work)

-        Read Every Week (As if you are reading a cookbook every week)

 Generation 4 – The Unflirty Critic (Expansion Pack: City Living)

You have seen people fall in love, hated that your parent spent more times cooking in the restaurant with your sibling than taking care of you. They may of gave you attention, but what was it for? So, you could critic the food they make? You seemed to also help your parent cook amazing foods with your own critical thinking. Was this a career path for you? Seems so!

In school, nobody wanted to be friends with you due to how brutal honest you were with their gifts and how they acted. Everybody hated you, and the only friend you had was your own sibling who stayed beside you, telling you to do what you can with the goals you want in life, making you flee to the city of San Mychuno! Yours was to be a food critic. With no friends, you never learned to love, apart from that one hook-up one night at a high school party your sibling brought you to after you graduated. You despised love. You despised the very thought of it. You were the Agnes Crumplebottom of love, whacking people with your clipboard of critic responses.

 -        Traits: Unflirty, Vegetarian & Loner

-        Aspiration: City Native

-        Starts as a Teenager (Teen)

-        Lvl. 10 of Critic Career (Food Critic Branch)

-        Max. Charisma Skill

-        Never Marry!

-        Become Pregnant at a Party As soon As You Age Up!

-        Never Talk to Child till they are a Teenager.

Optional:

-        You may use MCCC to get your sim pregnant as a Teenager instead of as soon as they age up! (Still at a party!)

 Generation 5 – It is Nothing Like Twilight, I Swear! (Game Pack: Vampires)

Your parent always shoved you away. You always loved studying upon the supernatural and embraced the feeling once as a teenager, you befriended a vampire, only to have a teenager brain and ask to of been turned. Your now stuck as a vampire and need a way to find a cure for your offspring you want to produce.

You do not want your future child to live through the same fate as you, as you turn other sims into vampires like yourself, before falling in love with another vampire, making it a love for eternity. However, you always adored your grandparents cooking, its as if they gave you heaven for food.

Your sims story starts as a teenager!

 -        Starts as a Teenager (Teen)

-        Traits: Kleptomaniac, Bro & Jealous

-        Aspiration: Good Vampire

-        Purchase Almost Every Vampire Perk!

-        Be Turned as a Teenager (or early Young Adult)

-        Have 1 – 3 Children!

-        Find a Cure for Vampirism Before child(ren) reaches Teen stage(s)

-        Marry Your Vampire Love

-        Have HORRIBLE relationship with parent, but GREAT relationship with grandparent.

Optional:

-        You can rebuild your relationship with your parent before they die, if your Sim wants to anyway!

 Generation 6 – I will adopt one, no two… No, all six! (Game Pack: Parenthood)

Your grateful for what your parent did for you, creating a cure for the vampirism you were born with. Although, you feel as if you need to prove to your parent that you can be the best parent in the world! Unfortunately, you were born unable to have children yourself (can be edited in CAS, or through mods).

You make it your mission to adopt as many kids as you want and making sure to spoil them with your video game greatness and parenting skills! Making them feel loved and adored!

 -        Traits: Family-Oriented, Good & Geek

-        Aspiration: Super Parent

-        You Start Once they reach Young Adult (YA)

-        Max. Parenting Skill

-        Max. Video Gaming Skill

-        Adopt 6 Toddlers Between Your Young Adult and Adult stage!

-        Never Get a Job! (Paint, Write… etc. for money!)

Optional:

-        You can marry if you want. Requirements: MUST share ONE trait your SIM has!

-        Adopt to Max. Household Limit Between your Young Adult and Adult Stage!

Recommended:

-        Youngest Child is Next Gen!

 Generation 7 – Time to Meow to this Howling! (Expansion Pack: Cats & Dogs)

You were raised with a lot of adoptive siblings, making you feel tired of being surrounded by older siblings that rushed around you taking care of your parent(s). The only love you felt, was from that one cat you found on the streets on that one visit to Brindleton Bay.

Once you became a Young Adult, you moved to Brindleton Bay and decided to start your passion for having your own Veterinary and surrounding yourself with stray animals you found on the street or adopting cats & dogs from the computer and/or phone! Maybe also falling in love with your own co-worker you hired?

 -        Traits: Cat Lover, Dog Lover & Loves the Outdoors

-        Aspiration: Friend of the Animals

-        Max. Animal Training Skill

-        Max. Veterinary Skill

-        Own a 5 Star Veterinary

-        Adopt any Number of Cats & Dogs! (e.g., 3 cats, 3 dogs… 2 cats, 3 dogs… etc.)

-        Marry a veterinary co-worker!

-        Have child(ren) with co-worker! (Does not matter on how many)

  Generation 8 – Spring All Year! (Expansion Pack: Seasons)

With your family adoring animals, you adored them too! But there is something you always asked for winterfest and your birthday, and that was your own private greenhouse to grow your own flowers to build your own store to grow flowers and sell them!

Your own way of doing so, was getting yourself a job as a gardener, and helping to design flowers for your friends, family and customers that wanted their own flowers done as a hobby while you worked, which lead to your own romantic destiny… but was it a fling, or did you unknowingly become the serial romantic and had/got someone else’s child that wasn’t your lover’s?

 -        Traits: Loves the Outdoors, Non-Committal & Romantic

-        Aspiration: Freelance Botanist

-        Reach Lvl.10 of Gardener Career (Floral Designer Branch)

-        Max. Gardening Skill

-        Max. Flower Arranging Skill

-        Marry Your Highschool Sweetheart

-        Have One Child with Another Sim that ISN’T Your Lover!

-        Get Divorced from your Highschool Sweetheart!

-        Have One Child with your Highschool Sweetheart!

Optional:

-        As a Teenager before gen starts, you can start with the Serial Romantic Aspiration!

 Generation 9 – “You love me! You really, really love me!” (Expansion Pack: Get Famous)

You loved the silver-screen as a toddler, looking at the beautiful actors/actresses performing on-screen and knowing instantly that is what YOU wanted to do.

Always laughed at for loving the arts in the countryside, you moved out of Brindleton Bay with your family so you could start your dreams of slowly becoming the best actor/actress the sims world has ever seen and seeing them raise their children to be just as famous as them in Del Sol Valley! The generation starts once you are a teenager!

 -        Traits: Creative, Self-Absorbed & Snob

-        Aspiration: World-Famous Celebrity

-        Reach Lvl.5 of Acting Club (Teen)

-        Reach Lvl.10 of Acting Career

-        Reach 5 Stars as a Celebrity!

-        Max. Acting Skill

-        Max. Charisma Skill

-        Befriend a 5 Star Celebrity

-        Marry a Celebrity Same, or Higher Star Level

-        Get Money Worth of: $300,000

-        Have Three Children with Lover.

Optional:

-        Max. Singing Skill (City Living Required)

 Generation 10 – Mother Nature is That You?! (Game Pack: Strangerville)

A sudden village has recently come back into the news after centuries of being forgotten and put through protection. You were invested in wanting to figure out what was going on while balancing your own military career.

Before then being sent to Strangerville to see what was going on in the village itself! You got told you could bring one person with you for security, and safety. However, once your friend eats a forbidden fruit found in a plant – things suddenly go south, making you know what you had to do, but all this chaos has made you more paranoid and scared for what could happen if you fail.

 -        Starts as a Young Adult (YA)

-        Traits: Athletic, Paranoid & Clumsy

-        Aspiration: Strangerville Mystery

-        Reach Lvl.10 Military Career (Officer Branch)

-        Max. Fitness Skill

-        Max. Charisma Skill

-        Have One Child once The Mother is defeated (if twins or triplets, that is fine too!)

-        Live with your Best Friend in Strangerville

-        Find love once The Mother is defeated!

Optional:

-        You can bring a co-worker to live with you in Strangerville if you don’t have a best friend!

Part Two: Not Released Yet

Other Information:

There is a 2nd Part of this challenge going to be available once it is complete, in case you want to continue the generation for another 5 or so generations! Depending on the packs that are released that have careers, or something interesting to add.

Have suggestions for other packs that were realised before Strangerville? Say and I’ll put them into the part 2 of this challenge!

P.S. This is the first challenge, and it is in trial run. So there maybe some problems. If there is, please message me through here, or through my other social media:

Twitter: /@SongWriteOC  https://twitter.com/SongWriteOC

If you do the challenge, please use the hashtag #SimsThePackChallenge on all social media, such as Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr... etc. Even YouTube! <3 

[crescentsteel]

Keeping a Secret - Part 10

pairing: Tsukishima x f!manager of Sendai Frogs genre: fluff, crack, slow burn, sexual tension, angst, smut wc: 11.6k (YES, ya girl is unstoppable forever)

a/n: As usual, AO3 link is in the masterlist page. This is a hella long of a chapter so in case Tumblr is shit and keeps crashing, you can read in AO3. 

Part 9 || Part 11 || masterlist

“Yamaguchi! It’s been so long since I last saw you. I’m glad you can join us today,” Akiteru smiles at Yamaguchi then, transfers his gaze to Yachi who he hasn’t seen in a while either. “You too, Yachi,” he welcomes Kei’s additional guests who’ll join for dinner.

“Thanks for inviting us, Akiteru,” Yamaguchi greets back warmly while Yachi waves behind the freckled guy. “Hi, Tsukishima-san,” she says meekly but cheerfully. 

He opens the door and motions them to come in. “You two can wait at Kei’s room. By the way, have you met his manager already? She’s joining us too.” 

“His manager?” Yachi asks curiously. “Ah. Sorry, Yachi. I meant his manager from Sendai Frogs,” he smiles apologetically. 

“I-I didn’t mean it like that!” she waves her hands defensively, “It’s just that I didn’t know they’re um... friends.”

“Oh,” Akiteru laughs lightly. “Yeah, they’re sort of close now because they used to work on a class project together,” he says vaguely from what he’s witnessed. 

Yamaguchi is a bit surprised. The last time he’s heard from Tsukki about you is that his best friend despises you, his manager. On the other hand, you seem to think that Tsukki is amusing despite the difficulty in handling him. How did it go from that to being close enough to get invited to Tsukki's small graduation party?

“So what time is she coming?” Yamaguchi asks since no other visitor is there as he looks around the living room. 

“She’s here already. She’s upstairs in Kei's room. They’re probably watching a movie. They usually do that when they’re done with school work.”

You’re staying at Tsukki’s room?! Watching a movie?! What happened? What did he miss? He still meets with Tsukki as often as he can but he’s never heard of this before. You’re not just a visitor for today’s celebration, but you’ve been a regular one. Are you and Tsukki… together?

“You and Yachi should head up too. I’m sure Kei won’t mind. I have to go check something,” Akiteru waves then walks to the kitchen. 

Yamaguchi nods then goes upstairs with Yachi following closely behind. “I thought Tsukki didn’t like his manager,” she comments softly. “Yeah. That’s what I heard the last time too,” he answers with uncertainty.

“Maybe she’s actually nice?” she suggests, which he agrees to. He’s met you and even though you appeared strict at first, you were actually approachable. 

“She is. She’s just a bit uhhh... loud?” He can’t really find the exact words to describe you because your personality during that one time he met you is too big to be put in words.

“Like Hinata?” 

He shakes his head. “Different from Hinata.” Yachi will meet you anyways so he decides to let her see for herself. He’s about to knock on Tsukki’s door when he hears something from inside. His closed fist hangs in the air as he tries to figure out if he heard what he thinks he did. 

Then he hears it again, a moan from a girl, followed by a perverted, “Tsukki...”

He drops his hand, stunned from the sounds behind the door. He hastily turns around to make Yachi go back downstairs before she hears it too. But when he faces her, she meets his gaze with her cheeks already rose in color and her eyes aghast. 

She heard it too!

He grabs her shoulders and makes her turn around abruptly. “L-let’s just wait for them downstairs,” he says shakily. Yachi nods frantically as she hurries to go back to the living room as well. 

They slowly sit down, both their cheeks flushed upon hearing their friend doing it. He feels more embarrassed because he just said that you’re loud. He didn’t anticipate Yachi would have to hear it in that manner. It’s also awkward how she is seated a considerable amount of space away from him, not a word exchanged between the two of them as they try to avoid each other’s gaze.

He was right. You two are together. Still,  he could’ve found out in a normal way rather than discovering it in such a scandalous one. 

Akiteru comes back to the living room and is a bit surprised when he finds the two back there, seated on the couch with a tense air between the both of them. “I thought you two went up to Kei’s room.” “They’re...uhh,” Yamaguchi meets Akiteru’s gaze with tinted cheeks. “They’re asleep,” Yamaguchi finishes his sentence then looks down.

Yachi looks at her friend conspicuously, reinforcing Akiteru’s doubt of Yamaguchi’s answer. “They’re sleeping? Together?” Akiteru asks skeptically. He could hear a movie playing inside Kei’s room when he went downstairs. Did you fall asleep while watching?

Yamaguchi nods slowly, but his eyes look unsure.

“Oh. Okay. Let me go wake them up then,” Akiteru says. As much as he’d like you two to rest, it would be rude of Kei to let his high school friends wait here. Besides, Akiteru is certain you’d love to get acquainted with Yachi since she is Kei’s previous manager.

He turns his back on the two visitors to head up when they both yell out, “No!” He frowns then looks back at them who are dubiously preventing him from going. “Why not?”

“Because they…” Yachi starts but is unable to finish.

“They seem really tired,” Yamaguchi continues.

It’s odd, but Akiteru lets it go since they're adamant to not wake you and Kei. “Okay then. I’ll go back up to my room now.” He had been fixing up the kitchen for some time now when Yamaguchi and Yachi arrived. He wants to rest before dinner. “Akiteru,” he hears Yamaguchi’s feeble voice. What is it this time? Yamaguchi and Yachi are acting very strange. “Hmm?” 

Yamaguchi opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out - only a sigh that’s followed by a defeated smile. “Nothing. Thank you for having us.”

Akiteru smiles back despite the weirdness of it and goes up. He passes by Kei’s room and no longer hears the movie playing. You two must have dozed off like Yamaguchi said. He smiles to himself. His brother must really be that comfortable with you that Kei actually doesn’t mind sleeping with you.

He turns the knob of his door and is about to enter his room when he hears uncanny sounds coming from his brother’s. Hir brows furrow as he lets go of the doorknob. He goes over to Kei’s room but stops on his tracks before he even reaches the front of it. 

Sleeping together.

Right.

You’ve been visiting and staying at Kei’s room freely. This shouldn’t be a surprise to him, but he can still feel his cheeks heating up from the erotic sounds. No wonder Yamaguchi and Yachi want to stay in the living room instead. He quickly descends the stairs and joins the two visitors, sitting on the couch adjacent to theirs. Even down here, he can still hear you occasionally. He can tell you’re having a great time. It’s faint but because he’s aware of what’s going on, he catches even the minimal sounds. 

He’s sure he’s not the only one who can, based on the two beside him who are looking at different corners of the house, pretending to not hear anything, but obviously bothered by it.

At least his mother went out to buy desserts and missed this. It would be really embarrassing for you if his mother is here to listen to this. 

He gets the TV remote then grins at Yamaguchi and Yachi. “Let’s watch while we wait for them to wake up?” Akiteru plasters a forced smile to ease the awkward tension.

The two nod frantically, probably can’t wait to drown out the background noise as well. 

---

You wake up a bit muddled despite feeling well-rested. You blink your eyes open and see Tsukki beside you. His eyes are closed, his hand on his chest while holding his phone, and his glasses are disarranged on his face. Unlike you, he’s already clothed. He must’ve gotten dressed right after then laid down beside you with his phone.

You stare at him for a while. Looking at him right now, he doesn’t look as nasty as he is when he is awake. You giggle at the thought. He’d be scowling at you right now if he finds out what you’re thinking. 

It’s odd. You just had sex with one of your players, but you feel no shame nor remorse. You remember him asking you to sleep after, but you didn’t expect he’d sleep beside you. It feels nice, knowing that he chose to lie down with you after doing it. It assures you once again that when he wakes up, there will be no regret from his side either. 

Contrary to the rumors circulating around, you’re actually not that experienced. 

You didn’t really enjoy sex from what little experience you had so you did not see the point of seeking it. You had your studies, your job, and your friends that took all of your time. So you saw it a waste of time to try and get laid when you don’t even enjoy it in the first place.

You didn’t know it could feel that good. You’ve often made fun of Tsukishima, his aloofness and his non-existent dating life. You had zero idea that he’d make you feel as good as he did.

His taunts that used to amuse you made you want him even more after you did it with him. 

You slap yourself mentally. You’re getting all flustered remembering the things he did to you with his lips and fingers.

You tug the blanket and use it to cover your chest as you sit up and look for your clothes. Fucking hell. Where are they? You stripped somewhere over there, so why is the floor all empty?

“They’re hung right over there in the closet if you’re looking for your clothes,” you hear Tsukishima’s voice behind you. When you turn your head to look at him, he opens his eyes as the corner of his lips shoots up. “Did you think I was going to let you mess up my room like yours?”

You give him a sarcastic smile and roll your eyes before twisting the blanket on your chest to cover your whole body as you stand up. You gather the hem of the blanket and lift it up off so the fabric is not touching the floor. You stagger on your steps as you walk to your clothes that are hung on his closet handle. 

You’d go to their bathroom to change but Akiteru or his mom might see you like this. “Mind giving me some privacy so I can change?”

He gets up and moves to sit at the edge of his bed. He plants his palms on the futon and tilts his chin up, regarding your entirety in a daunting manner. “I already saw it hours ago. What’s the big deal?”

You scoff and return his smug grin in a second. “If you wanted to see it again, all you had to do--” you start unknotting the blanket on your chest as you continue on, “--was ask nicely. But since I’m sooo generous, here you go,” you say patronizingly then let the blanket drop on the floor. 

His amusement sinks and his smirk disappears. “Enjoy,” you smile sweetly then turn around to start getting dressed. 

As you’re putting on your bra, you feel two palms on each side of your waist. You gasp softly from the sudden skin contact. You tilt your head slowly to look at him and are met with his impassive face yet desire-ridden eyes that trail from your face down to your bare back.

“W-what are you doing?” you whisper from how near he is.

“You told me to enjoy it, did you not?”

It was meant to tease him only! Why is he over there looking at you like he wants to go at it again?! His eyes flicker back up to meet yours, amusement glosses the desire in his eyes. “Don’t tell me you’re all talk, Y/n,” he says as he twists the strap of your bra and slowly slides it off your shoulder. 

It’s hypnotizing, luring you for a repeat of what just happened before you passed out. “I-I’m not,” you stutter as he inches his face closer to yours. He proceeds to the other strap on your left shoulder. “Really?” He presses himself on your back then grazes his lips over your ear. “You’ll let me fuck you again?”

The hairs in your arms trickle up as your voice gets stuck at the back of your throat. You’re totally frozen and you’re not sure if you’re even breathing. 

He travels his palms down your arm, completely removing your bra off of you. He grins when he feels your goosebumps. He withdraws a bit to look at your face. 

You’re so transparent. He can see how much you want this even when you’re not moving. 

He only meant to get back at you for sassing at him, but the way you’re staring at him right now makes him want to push you against his closet door and fuck you against it. 

“Answer me, Y/n,” he presses on, testing you if you’re willing to act upon this heightened madness going on between you two. 

You respond by facing him, latching your arms around his neck as you reach for his lips. Your bare chest is melded against his. He can feel your hard nipples through the fabric of his shirt. He grabs your ass and tugs your closer until the tent in his pants is prodding against your groin. 

You sigh on his mouth as you drop your hands to his waist, slipping it inside his shirt. Damn it. You two just had sex. He should be satiated since he’s had more than a taste already. But he just can’t resist you when you let him have his way with you like this. 

A set of knocks makes you pull away from each other.

 “Kei?” It’s his mom's voice.

You turn around swiftly and pick up your discarded underwear, hastily putting them on while he walks to the door. You get your shirt and wear it quickly, tucking your hair behind your ear when you’re done. When he sees you fully-clothed, he opens the door. His mom smiles at him as she announces, “Dinner will be ready soon. Yamaguchi and Yachi are here downstairs. I heard Y/n is here?” She scans his room, to which he follows her gaze that lands to you. You wave at his mom with an uncharacteristically bashful smile and a shade of rose spread on your cheeks while you’re seated by his desk.

He looks back at his mom and nods. “We’ll be there in a bit.” She grins in acknowledgment then waves at you too before going down. He closes the door as she leaves then turns to you. You rest your elbows on his desk and palm your face with both hands as you groan audibly. 

He frowns and asks, “What?”

You extend one palm towards him, signaling him to not move closer to where you are. “We need sufficient space between us so you don’t activate the hidden sex fiend inside you.”

Did you just call him a sex fiend? “Excuse me? You’re the one who started it.”

You put down your hand and gape at him unbelievably. “I was just joking! I didn’t know you’d actually take the bait.”

He clicks his tongue then sneers. “It’s not like I meant it either. I thought you’d stop me or push me away.”

You close your eyes in defeat and take a deep breath. “Let’s just go down.” You stand up and walk past him as you open the door and go down on your own. 

He shakes his head with a small smile then follows right after you. 

--

Yachi hears the sounds of footsteps in the stairs. Tsukishima’s parents, along with Akiteru, are already in the dining room. So it must be you and Tsukishima going down. 

She feels a bit awkward from what she heard a few hours ago, but she’s more curious now as to what you’re like. She didn’t know that Tsukishima is going out with someone, so she’s very interested in what kind of a person you are. 

Even with what Yamaguchi said, she still can’t imagine what you’d be like face to face. 

When your features come into light, she can only stare. You look so pretty! Nostalgia hits her as she remembers the time she first met Kiyoko-san. It’s very reminiscent of that moment because you’re saying something to Yamaguchi and she doesn’t hear it as she just stares at your features.

She now understands what Yamaguchi said about you being loud. Something about the way you move and speak draws attention. Even Yamaguchi seems to be talking a lot.

Then you suddenly turn to her and smile.

She snaps out of her trance. “Y-yes?”

You tilt your head then smile wider. “I was about to ask for your name.”

“Umm... it’s Yachi,” she eases up a bit because you look so friendly. Your face suddenly beams as you step nearer to her.

“So cute!!” You suddenly gush as you look closely at her. “Nice to meet you, Yachi. I’m Y/n.” You get her hand then shake it happily. 

“N-nice to meet you too! I didn’t know Tsukishima had such a pretty girlfriend,” she blurts out. You stop shaking her hand then frown. “Huh? Tsukki doesn’t have a girlfriend,” then you start talking in a hushed voice that’s meant to be a whisper but everyone can still hear it. “He said he doesn’t need one but I think he’s just scared someone will find out he’s actually capable of having feelings.”

She glances at Tsukishima who’s now glaring at you. How can that be? Tsukishima isn’t the type of person to let random people in his room. There’s also the sounds she heard a while ago. 

“But earlier--” Yamaguchi holds her hand all of a sudden, then gives her a soft, admonishing smile. Ah! What was she thinking? She was about to mention the snusnu out loud! Right to your face and Tsukishima’s. 

Although, she still can’t believe that Tsukishima would bring a lady home and do the snusnu in his room right when his family is right there. You seem so at ease with Tsukishima too even though most people are intimidated by him because of his demeanor and his height.

Even so, it would be inappropriate for her to suddenly spring that up when she just met you. She looks at Yamaguchi and smiles gratefully for stopping her on time.

“Earlier what?” you ask curiously.

“Err...” What does she say now? 

“Everyone! Food’s ready. What are you four still doing there?” Tsukishima’s mom calls out. She lets out a breath of relief; her tactlessness is saved by the food. 

--

“Thanks for coming tonight, y/n,” Akiteru says sincerely as you’re waiting for Tsukki to head down from his room. Your middle blocker was told by his mother to walk you to the bus station so he went up to get a jacket. 

During dinner, you were expecting some taunts directed towards you and Tsukishima from the frequent visits you’re making. You’re not oblivious. You can still sense that Akiteru and their mom are pairing you off with Tsukki. It’s just quelled now, so it’s not that awkward anymore whenever you visit.

But since it’s a dinner celebration, you thought it was going to be brought up. You were also a bit nervous that someone heard what happened that afternoon. Luckily, no one did. Even if anyone did, you’re grateful that no one mentioned it.

You wouldn’t have any wisecracks or excuses to defend yourself from how scandalous the confrontation would be. 

Overall, dinner was pleasant. Food was good and you got to know more of Tsukki’s friends and his family. Yamaguchi is as kind as you remember. The blonde girl, Yachi, is so cute and is just as nice as Yamaguchi. You asked how Tsukki was in high school and you only laughed when Yachi described Tsukki. It’s the same description you would give if you put on your goody-goody filter. 

“I think it’s me who has to thank you for the invite, Akiteru. It was really nice and felt like a legit celebration,” you smile sincerely at him.

“It’s nothing! You know you’re always welcome here, right?” 

Even though you want to visit as often as you did, you’re not sure you can anymore. Tsukki’s getting a job on top of being an athlete. He’ll be busy. You can’t just appear here whenever you want. Tsukki would want time for himself.

“I’m not sure, Akiteru. I think things will change a bit,” you remark truthfully.

“Why is that?” His brows burrow together as he asks.

“We’re not students anymore. I’m sure he’ll be occupied when he starts working soon.”

“He won’t mind if you still visit though. He can make time,” Akiteru adds confidently. You softly shake your head, amicably disagreeing with his statement. “He wouldn’t. We’re only hanging out now because of our free time. There’s no reason for Tsukki to free up his schedule for me. It’s not like we’re dating.”

Your eyes widen a bit after you say it. You didn’t mean to. You weren’t even thinking about it consciously. It just slipped out. 

“Do you want to date Kei?” Akiteru tilts his head with a thrilled smile on his face.

You hold his knowing gaze then respond with a patronizing smile. “Aki-san, Tsukki will be pissed if you keep shipping us like this.”

He laughs then stands up straight. “My bad! I didn’t mean to sound that way.”

You only laugh as well because you have no intention of answering his question. You’re not sure yourself in the first place.

“Hey. We should go now. It’s getting late,” you hear Tsukki’s voice behind you. 

You nod at Akiteru with a gracious smile before facing Tsukki. “I’ll go ahead now, Aki-san. Good night.”

He mirrors it with his own. “Take care, Y/n.”

You wave, then head for the door with Tsukki following you. When he closes it, you wait a few steps away from their house before you speak. “You don’t really have to walk me to the station, Tsukki.”

“In case you didn’t hear, my mom won’t stop badgering me to do it. Best to just give in and get it over with.”

You glance at his indifference and halt your steps. He stops walking as well, regarding you with puzzlement as to why you stopped. “I can walk on my own. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want.” 

You face him with a faint smile. It’s almost 11 and you’re sure he’s feeling tired as well. You wave at him then bid him a short, “Night!”

You let the night breeze kiss your cheeks as you let your mind wander while walking. You repressed the thought during dinner but you can’t push it away any longer. 

You had sex with Tsukki, one of the players you’re managing, and was willing to do so again when he came to you for a repeat. 

It would’ve been manageable if it was just sex for you. You can brush it off, explain to him that it was just that. But to you, it wasn’t. You know yourself. You’re not going to kid around and deny that you feel something for the guy. You just don’t know the extent of it because you’ve been letting it be, unknowingly watering the tiny sprouts of affection for him every time you’d meet outside of the gym. 

You sigh, fog coming out of your mouth as you wait for the next bus to arrive. You can feel things are about to get complicated. You’re not sure of what he feels for you exactly. There’s really no telling with Tsukishima. He doesn’t give much away when he acts nonchalant all the time.

“You’re awfully quiet.”

“Gah!” You jump a bit when you hear Tsukishima’s voice. You look at him then release the breath suspended in your chest. “I thought I said that you don’t have to walk me.”

He averts his gaze to the road. “We’re out already anyways. It’s not a big deal.”

There he is again, acting like he cares when his words are the contrary. You’d usually tease him for it, but not tonight. Tonight, you’re conflicted with your own feelings. You’re not in the mood for banter, so you reply with a passive, “Right.”

“Are you okay?”

The concern in his voice makes you look at him. “What makes you think I’m not?”

“You being quiet is abnormal.”

Your laugh permeates the cold air of the night. “For your information, I can also be quiet when I want to be,” you inform him with a whimsical smile.

He keeps his gaze at you but doesn’t speak. Although, you can tell he’s thinking about something. You’re about to ask what it is but the bus arrives. “I’ll be off now then,” you tell him before getting on the bus.

He nods then mutters, “Good night.” He doubts you heard it because you were quick to step inside the public vehicle. Once you’re seated, you look back at him through the window and wave. 

He doesn’t wave back but watches the bus leave. When he can no longer see it, he walks back home. 

The living and the dining room has been cleaned up when he arrives so he goes straight to his room. When he reaches the top of the stairs, Akiteru is there, leaning against the wall and smiling at him - obviously waiting for his return.

“What is it?” He cuts to the chase because he wants to rest already.

“Sorry about inviting Y/n without telling you.” Akiteru does look apologetic, but regret isn’t there on his older brother’s face.

“It’s done already so don’t worry about it,” he says with a straight face. He didn’t mind it. He’s actually glad that you were there. It’s an uncanny feeling but he is. You were very chatty and exuberant as usual, but it was not annoying. 

He realized that your loudness wasn’t only to piss him off or to mess with other people. You’re actually pleasant to have around when you’re not on your usual agenda to tick him off. Or maybe he’s already getting used to it. He can’t remember the last time he was legitimately annoyed at you.

He’s about to enter his room when Akiteru puts a hand on his shoulder. 

“What?” He asks with a frown because his brother looks too pleased about something and he feels like he won’t like it.

“Tone it down next time, Kei.”

“Tone what—“ He answers his own question before he can even finish it. He veers his eyes down as he feels the heat creeping on his neck up to his ears.

He wants to ask if it really was that audible, but he’s ashamed whatever the answer will be so he only nods once then gets inside his room.

He couldn’t even greet his own brother good night from how disgraceful he feels. He was too caught up at the last bits of it that he frankly didn’t care that you were too noisy. He enjoyed that you were.

He sighs. You being noisy isn’t even the beginning of it. The real issue is that he actually had sex with you, and didn’t mind doing so again.

Just the mere memory of your face pushed against his own pillow - eyes half-lidded from pleasure, lips parted as perverted moans slip out if it - is causing havoc in his brain and in his pants.

He needs to stop thinking about it, probably change the sheets too from how dirty it got from this afternoon’s activity.

He gets his towel to shower when he catches a glimpse of the paper bag you gave him this afternoon. After he showers and changes, he goes to his desk and sits on his chair.

He opens the bag and takes out the wrapped gift. He flips open the gift card which says, ‘I hope you like this, Dinoboy.’

Even without your presence, his face turns sour as if you were there taunting him. He made the right decision to open the present after you leave. He carefully removes the tapes from the wrapper until the content is revealed. 

He puts the box down and stares at it for a good while. It doesn’t have a price tag on it but he knows it’s even more expensive than the other figures he owns. It’s a 1:7 scale of a Spinosaurus. The box itself looks so pristine that he doesn’t want to unbox the item inside. But also, he wants to look at the details of the figure inside. 

He takes a deep breath and decides to wait a day before he actually opens the item. When he lifts the box to one of his elevated shelves, he sees another note taped to the side of the box. 

‘Congratulations, Tsukki!’

He scoffs at the note. You sound as if you didn’t graduate yourself. He discards the wrapper and the paperbag. The note cards, on the other hand, he tucks away inside his drawer. 

--

Even with the nap you had this afternoon, you still feel tired when you get back to your dorm. Before you enter the building, you take a look at its exterior. It hasn't really sunk in yet but you need to move out soon. You’re no longer a student and you need to find a place closer to the gym.

A bittersweet smile forms on your lips as you enter the dormitories.

“Miss l\n.” The guard halts you before you get inside. “Yeah?”

“There’s a package for you. I tried to tell you this afternoon but you were rushing to leave,” the guard tells you as he hands you a huge parcel. You frown at him and at the package he’s holding. “I didn’t order anything,” you tell him to let him know that he’s giving the item to the wrong person. 

He shows you the note that comes with it. It’s in print letters that state your whole name and your room number. You get the large package apprehensively and thank the guard even though you’re still not sure where it came from. The box is pretty light despite its size. 

Have you been ordering shit again while half asleep? You try to remember your online shopping activities as you walk to your room. 

With no recollection of buying something online, the first thing you do when you get to your room is open the mysterious box. Halfway through opening it, you realized that you shouldn’t have accepted this. This might’ve come from a stalker. If there’s no note inside saying whose it from, you’re throwing it. Inside the box are colorful cotton balls which are obviously there to cushion something. 

You dig through the pastel-colored cotton balls and see something green in color. You take it out of the box to see what it actually is. 

It’s a crocodile stuffed toy.

You prevent yourself from smiling, but before you even know it, your lips are already curved into a wide grin. You saw no card, but something tells you it’s from him. It’s from Tsukishima. 

Still, you empty the box and spill the little cotton balls to look for a note. When you reach the pit of the box, you see it - a tiny white card with something printed on it. 

‘From Kei Tsukishima’

You burst out laughing from the note. Seriously? He had to put his whole fucking name on it? You wipe the tears of laughter in the corner of your eyes as you look at the note again. Your cackling fades into a soft smile. It’s unexpectedly thoughtful of him. He sent you a gift before you were able to give him his. You put down the note and grab the crocodile plush. It’s effin’ huge. You pull it to your chest and hug it tight when it suddenly makes a growling sound.

You put down the toy in your bed then get your phone. 

‘Tsukki! why is dis crocodile making growling sounds? what am I, a child? But thank you.. :’>’

Then you throw your phone to your bed before you head to your bathroom for a quick shower. 

You come out of the shower, refreshed but the weariness more pronounced as your body is starting to relax. You get Tsukishima’s gift and place it beside your pillow before you lie down. You get your phone to set up your alarm when you see a response from Tsukki. 

He replied. You weren’t expecting a response at all. Maybe you forgot something in his room again? 

You open his text and check.

‘I chose that deliberately, so you know how a crocodile actually sounds.’

The laugh that comes from you is a soft one this time, accompanied by a light, fluttering feeling on the pit of your stomach. 

It was a few months ago but it feels like yesterday. He was in your room, working on the project with you when you suddenly did your made up crocodile sounds.

In retrospect, a plush is a very common gift. But this one has an actual thought behind it. It’s such a silly gift, but also a meaningful one. The gift reminds you of those days when you were still working on that project that got the two of you closer.

Who knew that Tsukishima also gives plushies as a gift? You thought he’d be the type to give planner, mugs, pen sets, or books - anything that screams smart and organized.

On the contrary, this gift is childish and light-hearted. 

You’ve spent more than three years with Tsukishima, but the last few months with him, you’re able to actually get to know him. It’s a tough process but as you got through his seemingly impenetrable layer of sarcasm, you found out that there’s something soft and fascinating beneath it.

You lock your phone after you calibrate your alarm to a later time. You put it beside your pillow then close your eyes.

This is going to be a problem. You can feel it. It’s happening. You’re falling for your blonde middle blocker.

Your phone vibrates, effectively disrupting you from your thoughts. You open it and see it’s from Tsukishima again.

‘Thanks again for the gift. I opened it just now. 

Goodnight.’

You couldn’t smile anymore, aware of the pit you’re descending into. Yeah. You’re definitely sure now as you put your phone away and stare at the metal frame of your bunk bed.

You’re in love with Kei Tsukishima.

--

“Y/n.”

You turn around and face Coach Mira when you hear her call. “Yes, Coach?” You ask cheerily. She smiles kindly at you as she answers, “Your graduation seemed to do you good. You have that glow on your face.”

You laugh it off even though you’re 87% sure there’s a different reason for said glow. “It’s the extra hours of sleep, Coach,” you answer half-truthfully.

“That’s good. Two matches away and we’re going against Division . The first one is this weekend already. I want us to review our team’s recent performance and discuss if we need to switch things.”

Your brows scrunch up a little at what Coach is asking from you. “We?” You clarify because she has never asked you to do that before.

She grins at you casually, almost friendly even. “Yeah. I figured I should start training you already. After this season, I plan to make you the assistant coach. I already asked the admin office to post a job ad for your replacement.”

You’re pretty sure your jaw is on the floor at this point. You, an assistant coach? “But Coach, am I not too young for it?”

She raises a brow. “Are you saying I’m old?”

You shake your head aggressively accompanied with a barrage of ‘no.’ “I just didn’t think I was qualified,” you explain, still expressionless from incredulity.

“I’m the judge of that, y/n. You’re extremely qualified for it. You’ve played in middle school and high school so you have actual game experience. Your reports also reflect that you have an excellent overall grasp of the game. Not to mention, you know how to handle the players.” 

Her cold eyes, which she’s known for, soften up a little as she adds, “You’re the best manager I’ve had in years.” 

You have no idea how to react. You’re still gaping at Coach, processing what she just said. “Only if you want to, of course. If not, another manager wouldn’t hurt. You must be considering getting another job too since you’ve graduated. Do me a favor and think about it, will you?” 

You can only nod because it definitely is something to process. But you can’t deny that you’re happy to hear that your sincere passion and interest for the game and the team actually got somewhere. Never in your whole volleyball career did you think that you’d be considered as a coach, even if it’s just an assistant. 

“I will,” you bow, grateful for the opportunity. “Thank you for considering me, Coach.”

She laughs. “Since when have you been so formal?”

You stand up straight and laugh as well. “Sorry! I was just... whew,” you laugh again because there are just no words for it. 

“That’s a good ‘whew,’ right?”

You grin widely then nod happily.

“Alright, I’ve kept you long enough. You should go now and get that extra sleep of yours,” Coach Mira says jovially then waves you goodbye before she gets out of the gym. When it’s only you left inside, you walk to the middle of the gym. You take a deep breath and squeal out loud, your shrill scream reverberating in the big gymnasium. You’re pretty sure Coach Mira heard it cause she just went outside but you don’t care. You’re too happy to care. 

You put both palms against your cheeks to stop yourself from smiling because it hurts already. 

“I can hear you from outside.” 

You turn around with your hands still pressed on your face when you see Tsukki walking towards you. “Hey! What’re you doing here? The team’s been dismissed a while ago already,” you speak with that unbreakable grin still on your face. Tsukki’s brows furrow a bit but it doesn’t stay long as he eyes the locker room. “I forgot my knee pads.”

“I see. I’ll wait for you then we can have dinner after since we’re both free already,” you suggest unconsciously because you’re too elated and you feel like celebrating with someone.

He seems to not make anything out of it because he only nods. “I’ll just get my knee pads,” he says, then walks to the locker room. 

You go to your stuff and hum while you organize them in your sling bag. Once you’re done, you yell out, “Close the lights when you’re done!” 

You proceed to the main switch of the lights then wait for Tsukki by the entrance. He comes back not long after, watching you lock the gymnasium after he gets out. You start walking to that restaurant you’ve been eyeing for sometime now. Tsukki treads beside you without saying anything until you two get inside and take your seat.

“You’ve been smiling since we left the gym. Doesn’t your face hurt?”

You giggle as he asks. “It does actually. I feel like my cheeks will be sore tomorrow if that’s even possible.”

When the server comes, you both hand the menu you’ve filled out. When they leave, Tsukki crosses his legs and leans against the table. “Any reason for it?”

“I know I’m a happy person in general but I won’t be smiling like this for no reason.”

In a snap, his expression glowers and his eyes turn dismal. “You’re not a happy person. You’re just usually giddy because you know how to make people uncomfortable.”

You press your lips together so you don’t disrupt other tables if you laugh loudly. “I can’t say you’re wrong but hey, I’m actually a pleasant person half of the time.”

He sighs. “You know what I’m asking about.”

You smile with no mischief behind it this time. “I think I might get a new job.”

Both his brows shoot up, shock evident on his face as you announce it. “You’re … leaving the team?” For someone who usually has a blank face, you can see disapproval? No, not exactly. It’s something else.

You see despondency underneath the shocked exterior, as if he doesn’t want you to leave. You’d correct his wrong assumption but he looks too serious not to tease.

You lessen your wide smile even though your laughter is still on your chest waiting to erupt any moment. “I can’t be a manager forever, can I?” You ask him rhetorically. 

Tsukishima didn’t expect you to be. But he also didn’t expect you’d resign so soon when you told him how satisfied you are with being their manager. It feels too sudden. You may be full of shit but you’re good at what you do. He can’t imagine having someone else replace you when you’re already … Fuck. Even in his head, he has a hard time admitting your managerial capabilities are close to perfection.

You also look too damn happy for someone who’s letting go of something she likes doing. Did you apply for another  job you’re interested in without telling him? Not that you’re required to. It’s just that you’ve talked about this and you didn’t seem to want a new job at the moment.

“Right,” he says thriftily for there’s really nothing else to say. It’s not like he’ll convince you to stay. You’re smart. You’ll do well with whatever you decide to do in your life.

It’ll just feel different when you leave. Will you still watch the games? Will you visit the team? Will he still see you around?

You suddenly stand up and sit beside him, your eyes never leaving his. “I’ll miss being your manager, Tsukishima.” It was light-hearted and sincere. 

He doesn’t like it. What he doesn’t like even more are the dips in his chest that makes it hard for him to look at . Something stirs inside him and he’s not comfortable with it.

When he looks down on the smooth marble surface of the table, you suddenly bury your face on his arm. The moment he goes rigid, he feels your shoulders start to shake. 

He abruptly looks at you to ask what’s wrong when you promptly glance up at him with tears welling in the corner of your eyes. He would’ve been worried but the tears and the trembling of your shoulders are not because you’re crying. 

You’re laughing. You’re only using his arm to muffle your laughter. 

He glares at your silly humored face then moves farther from you so he can pretend he’s not with you while you laugh by yourself. You pranked him again. How could he fall for that so easily when you’ve always made fun of him?

“Wait, no! Tsukki, I’m sorry!” You tug his sleeve and look at him half-apologetic but also still half-amused. He averts his gaze and ignores you. Maybe he should just leave since it looks like you’ll keep this up with how you’re still laughing heartily. He gets ready to stand up but you block him by standing up first.

You grip both his shoulders and make him face you. Your face is still delighted, seeping of impertinent deviousness. “Please don’t leave. I went borderline asshole. My bad.” He loosens up when he recognizes that you’re actually contrite as you apologize the second time. 

“Then sit down,” he eyes and notices that people are staring from how you’re hovering over him. You do as he says, the server coming back at the same time with your orders. You thank them then mutter a low ‘itadakimasu’ before breaking your chopsticks apart. 

You’re already digging in but he still hasn’t touched his food. “So what was it?”

You slurp on your ramen then turn to him with noodles still hanging from your lips. You glug them up with traces of soup on your chin after you do. He gets a napkin and dabs it on the spot. “Will you ever learn to eat properly?”

“I’m not leaving, Tsukki,” your answer to a different question makes him pause for a second with the napkin pressed on your skin. You’re not sure what he’d prefer: how you messed with him just now or the news you’re going to tell him. 

You know that it’s supposed to be confidential information, especially to him since he’s a member of the team. But at the same time, it’s because it’s Tsukishima that you’re not worried about him babbling it to others before Coach announces it. 

“Coach asked me to be her assistant. I’m considering it.”

You don’t stray your eyes away from his as he withdraws and puts the used napkin on the table. “And? Are you going to take it?”

He’s surprisingly calm about this. You thought he’d make a big deal out of it because you know how detests when you jokingly boss him around. When you become an assistant coach, you have more authority to do so.

“I’m still thinking about it,” you reply.

“You seemed sure of it when you screamed like a banshee in the gym when I saw you,” he comments as he starts stirring his bowl. 

“I’m elated to be considered. Coach is very finicky and has high standards and she said some really nice things that makes me qualified for it,” you sip on the warm stock of the ramen. 

“Then why are you unsure?”

You’re not certain either. Maybe it’s because you never really thought about being an Assistant Coach, or maybe you really are conscious of doing something far off from your degree after all. But setting those aside, Tsukki sounds like he’s okay with it. 

You grin at him again.

“Aww. Tsukki! Do you actually want me as the Assistant Coach?” God, you really have to stop now. He almost walked out on you already and you’re pushing him again. ‘Sorry Tsukki. That’s the last one for tonight. I promise,’ you tell him in your head. 

His hand holding the chopsticks going up to his mouth stops mid-air before he puts the chopsticks back down to his bowl. You thought he was going to give you a death stare again but he only looks at his food. 

“I won’t mind.”

You blink a few times at him even though he’s not taking notice anymore. Did he really say what you think he said? No salty remarks? No anything? Your smile fades when you hear it, only for it to come back even wider. 

You get back to your ramen, enjoying your meal even more than you usually do. 

--

During your trip back home, your head is occupied thinking about the offer. There’s really no rush for a decision, but you can’t help but contemplate on it. You like the job. You think it’s exciting and you do want it. There’s just that tiny hesitation because it’s a job not related to your degree. 

You aren’t really looking for a job at the moment because you want to savor your job as a manager for a little bit more, but you didn’t anticipate that you’d be presented with the opportunity. What’s holding you back is that you’d like it too much and that you might not want to look for another job anymore. 

Ugh. Why must this be so hard?

You groan as you carelessly plop onto your bed, hitting your head on to your metal railing as you do. You curse out loud as you massage the spot you hit. As you soothe it, you start laughing by yourself. 

The bump on your head seemed to make you snap out of your uncertainty. You’re the one making this harder than it seems.

You have a job offer, which you know you’ll love, and you’re hesitating about something such as loving it too much? So what if you do? Many people can only dream of having a job that they actually like. Not to mention, you’re very much aware that athletic coaches for professional teams pay well. 

You get your phone and text Tsukki. 

‘I’ll do it, Tsukki. I’m taking Coach’s offer hahahahahah :P’

After you send it to him, you put your phone back on your desk. You settle on your bed, more at ease now that you’ve made the decision that feels right to you. 

When you wake up, you can tell that you’ve had one hell of a sleep - one that lets you know that you don’t have to get up until 4pm which is when training starts on a weekday. 

You get your phone to check the time so you know how long you can bum around today. Then you see two messages received last night from Tsukki.

‘You’ll be the most annoying assistant coach there is. 

But congratulations.’

The second message was received an hour after the first one. 

‘Good night.’

You close your eyes and put your phone against your chest. Seriously, what is wrong with you? It’s just a good night text but it’s doing stupid things to your heart. Is he even aware he does this to you? 

Who knew that after three years of being the untouchable manager, you would be dating one of your athletes? You weren’t sure at first if you two are dating because no one says anything. You don’t want to presume but each day, Tsukki tells you with actions, the little gestures that speak volumes. 

It’s so absurd, but the kind of absurd you’re willing to get yourself into. In the gym, you still act the same as before, which works for you because you would not go all lovey dovey in front of the team. Obviously, Tsukki is the same. He’s not the kind of person who expresses affection in public.

Actually, he’s not that expressive at all. However, there’s that softness to him that he shows when it’s only the two of you. It’s not much, but you’re not really complaining. Tsukki is a tough nut to crack, but you know he cares for you in a way. You’re okay with that because you don’t mind taking it slow. You enjoy the slow unlayering of Tsukki’s sides which you’ve never seen before. 

The cutie, Yachi, thought you were Tsukki’s girlfriend during dinner at the Tsukishimas. At the time, you really didn’t think you were anything of that sort. But after that, things just kept escalating. Even when you’re not visiting their house, you two find time together. 

How is that not dating each other?

Although you’re still spending a lot of time with Tsukki, you miss their house. Now that you think about it, the last time you were there was during that graduation party. You’ve been too shy to ask if you can go again because you don’t want to seem like you feel at home there, even though you really do. No thanks to Akiteru. 

Also, there’s the incident from last time. You can feel your face getting warm as you think about how you did it with him. How can you not though? You lost control all over and he had you whining and pleading for him. 

How shameless are you, thinking of sex already just from the idea of being in Tsukki’s room. You get your pillow and stuff it against your face. 

‘I’m fine. I’m okay. I’m a normal lady who has urges for the man she likes. Yep. I’m fine.’ You convince yourself before you get up from bed. 

---

“Hey everyone, this is Shiro. Starting today, she’ll also be your manager alongside me. Please give her a warm welcome,” you introduce the new girl who presents herself well in front of the boys but whose hands are shaking behind her back. 

Aww, so precious. You don’t remember being nervous on your first day as a manager but of course, not everyone is as thick-skinned as you are.

“Wow, we’re having two managers now?” Kogane asks, his eyes twinkling from looking at you and Shiro, who's a looker as well.

Coach glances at you meaningfully but you only smile it off. Even though you’ve decided, you think it’s best to tell Coach once you’ve finished training the new manager she picked from all the applicants you screened. 

“Yeah! If you need something I usually do for you guys, you can ask her too. But take it easy on her, okay?” You put a hand on Shiro’s shoulder as you address the team.

They all clap and give hoots and cheers for the new manager, except Tsukki who just stared and nodded at Shiro. You should tell her to not take it personally later after practice.

Your introduction is followed up immediately by Coach. “As you know, the next match decides whether we go up against DESEO Hornets or not. But before we excite ourselves for that, let’s make sure you’re prepared for the Motor Spirits first. Shiro will be an additional help to make that happen.”

When you started looking at the application forms, you were a bit surprised by the several numbers submitted. You were only expecting one or two because it has only been less than two weeks when Coach told you about the new job. She probably posted the ad way before she told you about it. The timing is right though because you just won your recent match last weekend. You can already start showing her the ropes of her duties when game season is going on.

Before you introduced Shiro to the team, you’ve already met her a few times to brief her about her role and the team members’ profile. That way, she’s not going straight to it with knowledge she only got from Sports magazines and the games she’s watched. 

Between that, the reports for the recent match, and moving out - the week has been hectic as fuck for you. Your plan to visit the Tsukishima’s residence didn’t happen from how things were unfolding.

It’s okay though. He’s there with you several times while you were picking your new apartment. He says you’re too choosy and you already have visited decent places as options but whatever. You’ll take as long as you like until you find the ideal place for you (actually it’s until your dorm caters to your request for extension).

But now that your schedule is not as tight as it was last week, you have a few hours you can spend with Tsukki that doesn’t involve raiding the apartments for rent in Sendai. 

After today’s training, you were hoping for Tsukishima to be waiting for you after you close up the gym with Shiro but he’s not there. You say your goodbye to the new manager then walk your usual way in case he’s there ready to pop out of nowhere again but still no Tsukishima up until you reach the bus stop. 

Oh well. It’s not like he was required to. He doesn’t always wait for you anyway. But it would’ve been nice if he was with you right now. 

On your way home, you text him.

‘Hey. You went home already?’

You’re already at your dorm and he still hasn't responded. You’ve already showered and are now lying down, but still no response. You frown at your phone then text him again.

‘Halooo?’

After a minute, he finally replies. 

‘Saw your text just now. Yeah. I went home as soon as training was done.’

You purse your lips to the side. ‘Kay. Can I drop by tomorrow?’ You ask haphazardly since it’s been really wanting to visit for days now. Even though you’re not exactly friends with Akiteru, you kinda miss his presence too.

When your phone buzzes, you open the message instantly.

‘Sure’

You grin as you read it. You lock your phone then get your laptop to watch something to calm your silly excitement to have your merry lil’ visit at the Tsukishimas tomorrow.

—

“Y/n!” Akiteru beams when he opens the door for you. “It’s been so long since your last visit.” You giggle at his remark. “It’s only been a little less than three weeks, Aki-san,” you tell him even though it does feel like it has been more than that despite how busy you are.

“Ah, sorry. I was used to having you over at least twice a week.”

Wow. Twice a week? You didn’t realize you came there that often. You smile then get inside their living room. “I guess things are a bit different now,” you comment vaguely. 

“For the better, I hope,” he smiles knowingly at you, which you return casually. “I think it is.”

He seems satisfied with your answer and doesn’t ask further. “Kei is upstairs. He just got home from his first day at work. Be umm… a little nicer to him tonight, Y/n. He’s a bit snappy,” Akiteru informs you.

“What do you mean, Aki-san? I’m always nice to him,” you put on your goody goody shoes pretense but one glance at Akiteru and you know he’s not buying it despite his usual, congenial smile.

You laugh softly and take down the act. “I will. I won’t aggravate him excessively tonight,” you assure him half-heartedly because you’re not really sure you can do that. Sometimes, Tsukki’s just asking for it with how easily irritated he is.

You nod at Akiteru then go up the stairs. When you reach Tsukki’s room, you knock twice on his door with a grin plastered on your face already.

He opens the door and tilts his head to beckon you to come inside. You step in and immediately sit on his bed while he’s seated by his desk. He crosses his legs then rests one elbow on his thigh as he looks at you with his chin resting on his palm.

Damn. Tsukki looks good. He looks so fucking good. What the hell? You saw him from practice just the other day and he didn’t look like he does right now! Nothing’s too different, but something has changed as well. 

“Why are you staring?”

“You look very nice today,” you answer quickly without thinking it over. He does look nice and you want him to know. 

“Wha-“ he closes his eyes and sighs before he finishes whatever he was going to say. “I’ve had a long day, y/n. Why are you here?”

Akiteru said Tsukki is snappy but from what you can see, Tsukki’s only tired. Still, you’re glad he didn’t get mad despite misinterpreting your mere observations as taunting. 

You smile and pat the space beside you. He raises his brow but complies anyway as he stands up and sits beside you.

“Tough first day?” You prod because he seems too worn out for someone who’s working for only a day. Last time you talked about it, he looked excited to do it. Well, as excited as Tsukki can look, but you know that he was looking forward to it.

“It’s not that it’s tough. The person orienting me is the problem. She’s loud and talks non-stop. Her shrill voice isn’t any help,” he explains with dread.

Ah, the classic museum guide behavior. You smirk at him and lean back a bit. “Huh… overbearingly loud and annoying. Hmm. Is she really that bad?” You ask playfully, pretending to still talk about whoever briefed him for work this morning.

However, Tsukki knows you and you know he’s aware that you’re not talking about his coworker at all. “No.” He smirks back at you as he plants one palm on the mattress and leans forward, his body almost pressed onto yours as he locks his gaze onto yours.

“She’s a lot worse,” he says in a convinced tone, but you don’t falter.

“Sounds like a fun lady to me,” you respond just as firmly as he does. “Maybe you could learn a thing or two from her,” you add haughtily. He loses his composure and looks down as he chuckles. 

“Right,” he pulls back and sits up straight. “By the way, why aren’t you announcing your promotion yet?”

You feel a bit of warmth on your cheeks as he asks it. You didn’t think it was a promotion, so to hear it as such is very flattering.

“Uh... I decided not to tell Coach until Shiro has settled into the team.”

His brows burrow together. “Why? I thought you were sure already.”

“I am. I just want Shiro to be a little bit more comfortable doing things I used to do for the team before I tell Coach. Besides, I don’t get the job until the end of game season, so I don’t see the rush of telling her so soon.” As much as you like the new girl, you want to make sure that she’s capable before you hand all your responsibilities to her.

Settling down as a manager takes time and you’re certain that she won’t be able to get it all by end of game season. However; you want her to know at least the bare minimum of what she has to --

Your train of thought is disrupted when you catch a glimpse of something in Tsukki’s shelf above his desk. You stand up and walk towards it.

“Hey,” you say softly to the object you saw, but Tsukki must have thought it was him because he stands up and comes behind you. “What is it?” he asks, then glances at where you’re looking at. 

“How come it’s still boxed?” You face him and question him curiously.

He only looks at the box in silence thoughis expression not giving away whatever he’s thinking. “Did you know it was a rare item?” His voice is low as he flicks his eyes towards you. 

You nod proudly. It’s exactly why you bought it for him. You’ve been looking into models for two weeks prior to graduation to make sure you get something really nice for him. One time he went out to use the bathroom, you secretly took a photo of his humble collection to make sure you won’t get something he already has. You know a thing or two about dinosaurs but you can’t possibly identify all of them just by looking at them from a distance. Hence, the photo to help you out. 

That’s why you wanted to see him open it because you wanted to witness how he’ll react when he sees it. But Tsukki being the tsundere that he is, refused. 

“So why is it still boxed?” you persist asking.

“It’ll lose it’s value if I take it out.”

You frown at his answer. “Are you planning to resell it?” It would be upsetting if he is. You didn’t spend all that effort so he can sell it at a higher price. You might as well have given him money. Besides, his other toys are not in boxes. It doesn’t make sense that this one he wants to keep in its box. 

“No. But it’ll lose its mint condition if I take it out.”

“What? But that’s the point of it. Aren’t you curious about what it's actually like to hold it? Don’t you want to see the details of it clearly?” You know it’s sculpted well because you saw the photos but seeing it in person and feeling it are different things. 

“It will wear faster if I take it out,” he stands his ground.

You cross your arms then regard his stubborn self. “Do you want to open it or not?”

He does. He’s very tempted to open it. He’s tempted every day he sees it when he sits by his desk. But he’s able to control himself and ignore the urge to do so. He’s just happy to have it. He doesn’t have to open it. 

“Yeah, but-”

“I didn’t give it to you so you could stare at its box. If you scratch it, drop it, or whatever, so what? At least you were able to actually play with it and enjoy it,” you press on. 

Some collectors like their figures kept in its box, but not Tsukishima. He likes it when they’re on display, available for him to look at and hold. But this one is so rare that he wants to keep it the way it is so it stays flawless - perfect. 

Telling him that he should open it is no help to his wish to keep it pristine, especially when you’re this tenacious. He sighs and gets the box. You clap excitedly when he does, your whole attention on him as he starts carefully opening the top lid of the box. 

He, himself, is getting excited but he maintains the gentle way he opens the box. He puts it on his desk then takes out the blister where the actual figure is. You stare vehemently at him unboxing the toy until he finally touches it with his bare hands.

He feels the coarse texture of the details of the Spinosaurus. The paint job on the dorsal sail of it is well-done. It’s sculpted splendidly and because of its size, he can easily see the minute details . He takes his eyes off a bit from it so he can face you to thank you again for it, but you’re already staring at him. 

You blink once then give him the softest smile he’s ever seen from you. You look happy, but not the kind of happy you are when you’re making people uneasy. It’s a sincere gentle happiness that makes you more radiant than you already are. 

He doesn’t know why you’re even happy but he doesn’t bother asking why, not when you’re this beautiful right before him.

He raises his hand to your neck and tilts his head as he leans down to capture the essence with a kiss. As his lips touch yours, you hold his hand on your neck then return the delicate way he nips on your lip. 

It could possibly be the most gentle kiss you two have shared but to him, it’s the most intense one. His heart is racing with this overwhelming feeling he can’t place. He pulls away and catches you flutter your eyes open, your orbs gleaming amorously as you meet his gaze.

You take a shallow breath and squeeze his wrist gently. 

“I love you.”

He feels the air on his lungs knocked out as you say it. You mean it. You truly mean it. He can see that in your face, feel it with the genuineness in your voice. It is at that moment when he realizes how his feelings for you are way beyond good companionship and casual kisses. It’s way deeper and way more serious than that. 

It’s… It’s scary. The intense feeling welling on his chest makes him feel like he’s treading in an unfamiliar territory where logic and rational thinking won’t cut it.

All of a sudden, he becomes aware that he’s still holding the figure with his other hand. He was happy to have opened it earlier but now it feels too fragile to even hold. He lets you go and gets the blister and returns the Spinosaurus in its box. He regrets opening it. He shouldn’t have been swayed by you and kept it in its box. 

He was already okay with it staying in its box. He would’ve been fine having it as it is. It would remain perfect that way.

You frown when he’s suddenly in a haste to keep the toy when you just confessed how you truly feel for him. It’s very confusing because just a while ago, he was looking at you endearingly. He kissed you so softly that it made you feel secure about your feelings for him. It made you feel that he has the same feeling you do - that he loves you too. 

Even after you said it, his features reflected a soft delightness that made you hope. You don't know what happened that caused him to suddenly turn cold. He removes his hand from your neck nonchalantly then starts returning the toy inside the box.

“What’s wrong? Tsukki?” you ask cluelessly as he hastily puts back the box to his shelf.

“What do you want me to say?” he responds with no hint of apathy that it sounds almost cruel. He turns to you and even his face is devoid of anything. He’s usually stoic but this one is different. Everything about his demeanor is screaming that he couldn’t care less about your heartfelt confession. 

“I just—”

“Why would you tell me that?”

It’s getting hard to breathe with how ruthless he’s looking down on you. You take shallow breaths before you swallow the painful knob at the back of your throat. “I’m not sure. It just came out.” You’re still keeping it together while you hold his cold stare. “Is it wrong to feel that way? We’re dating already,” you insist even though your voice is already defeated. 

His brow shoots up at your statement. “Dating? What gave you that idea?”

a/n: You probably hate me now. :)

Part 9 || Part 11 || masterlist

taglist (those crossed out can’t be tagged)

@ameliaxo @suikrem @akaashisslave @tsumurai  @loving-unicorns106 @flairlust @geektastic84 @anaiss97 @berna-dette @just4readingfics @suteorra @xxekitten69xx @simp4tsukkii @music-is-all-i-need @keshinslittlegirl @raspberrysunshinebby @iminlovewhaikyuu @pdiddy11 @lightyagamami @sailorscout1902 @lovershaikyuu  @expectonothinfromme @finnydraws @namelessidentity @hqbeesun @yatoatyourservice @mrkozume @suzuyamitsuki @celestialarchiveshq @yongboxerrr @gomenpudding @kutiekoge @fizzfrick @flamingosis @korean-bbq @ihaterainbowsprinkles @red-lint @backtonormalthings @borpcorp @lonelyheartxn @venomouscreatures @lucyrocks86 @shawtiie @honestlysora @sunanyaa @my-dream-universe @mysteriousparker @kaieoh @softpeachysoul​ @millenialfanfictionaddiction

[itstheimpossibledream]

Only A Play

Part 5 

Word Count: 2213

Pairing: AU Henry x FemBlack!Reader

Warning:  Smut, Angst, Some fluff

Summary:  Can reader & Henry work out their differences or will they be better apart? Breakup sex? Idk it’s the finale let me know what you think!

“ and that’s when I packed my things and came to New York.” Henry finishes.

 You’d been looking down at your hands, trying not to get lost in his features while he spoke, knowing the tabloids would make a day out of it. Angling the photograph and captioning it something cheesy about ‘love being in the air’ or the fact that you’re ‘just in time for Valentine’s Day’. The dating speculations you could take but, the photographic evidence that made your mom ask questions was a different story entirely.Since the show had opened the two of you toured from interview to interview and then performed at night. The day usually culminating in a needy fuck at his apartment or in your dressing room if he couldn’t wait. You stayed at his place often and while it was still mostly in booty-call  territory, (despite the previous year of apartment crashing and drunk declarations of love) the dinners and breakfasts remained consistent. You answered the interviewer’s questions calmly but,nothing could have prepared you for the final follow up. He turns to Henry, “And so aside from your new relationship(he motions to you),have you made any other friends during your time in New York?” He only hesitated slightly,before answering. He smirks but,the curve of his lip is gone before you know it. “I have really enjoyed working with her, and I hope our artistic relationship will flourish long after this production has ended.” he smiles diplomatically while reaching for your hand.“As far as new friends I believe my doorman Jason and I have gotten pretty close.” he laughs. When he laughs, the whole world laughs with him and the audience is no exception.Eventually , the hours of embarrassment have passed and you’re being rushed back into a cab to Henry’s apartment. 

“So what was that?” you say as he closes the door, sliding into the car behind you. 

“What?” he asks blissfully unaware of your annoyance. 

“That whole continuing relationship thing?”you push.

“I said artistic relationship.” he corrected sternly.

 “ You gave them ammo.” you cut back quickly.

“And so what? Two people in a romantic play together are speculated to date?How awful.” He grumbles. 

“You don’t get to make a choice like that before talking to me about it.”

“It wasn’t a choice, it was the truth.” he quips back sternly.

“A truth that will put the tabloids on my ass.It’s been bad since we opened the show but, you and I both know this is only going to make it worse.” you mirrored his tone, clearly losing your cool at the idea of being followed to your apartment by cameras. 

“Well you can stay with me as long as you need.” He says, firmly setting his jaw.You roll your eyes towards the window, Watching the people who pass by. 

“So, this is what it was about? control ?”

“Please!” He scoffs “I don’t need the paparazzi holding your apartment hostage,to get you to stay at my place.You’re practically there every night anyway.” It comes out sounding like more of a complaint than he had meant for it to. Your blood boils with resentment of his comfortability.You can feel the heaviness in your eyes when the car pulls up to his ‘flat’. A term you had started using sarcastically but had slowly begun to stick. Even now, you despised that while being a convenient fuck , he had permeated your subconscious enough to make you even think to refer to it as a flat. 

“What’s on your mind?” he finally asked, breaking the silence that had been holding court in the elevator. He didn’t sound like he really wanted to know, infact he seemed like he was solely asking for courteous purposes and that was it. You turned your entire body to face him, you could feel that no matter how hard you were trying your face had begun to break. 

“You know, you were right. There’s no reason for me to be here.” your lips upturned in a smile as you saw the glassyness of your eyes reflected in his face. It was an odd pain , not one you could name but, one you knew without a doubt was real. You had shared something special, he knew that. But, anyone could see that the lack of compatibility outside of the bedroom left the relationship forever doomed.He rolled his tongue between his lips and you couldn’t help but think of how blissful the silence was between you two. Someone had to say it, and in true fashion Henry was not strong enough. 

“ What are you talking about?!” He followed behind you into the hallway as you fled the elevator, opening the door to the apartment.

“We aren’t compatible Henry. You don’t get me. My lifestyle, my friends,my choices; you think it’s all a fucking joke or something. Well, it’s not,It’s not a fucking joke.It’s my real life. I know we play and talk about how much money you make but when it comes down to it I’ve never seen you put a red cent to helping anyone else. But, you watch me tithe everything I earn to give back to the communities that raised me. If you wanted to be with me, like really wanted to be with me,you would have already invested yourself in the things I find important. Instead, what you do is stand on red carpet at a black, trans fundraising gala and steal the attention once again.”

“I thought you were mad about the interview, now you’re mad about the gala?!?”

“I’m mad about all of it!” you screamed directly into his beautifully manicured face. Not an eyelash out of place and yet he still couldn’t contend with the neatening of his moral compass. 

“I’m mad because you center yourself in any safe space for people of color I take you to.I’m mad because you don’t ask for my opinion or consent before doing anything, because you don’t care.Actually, I’m not even mad anymore.I just see it for what it is.”The tears had started to slowly flow now, and while your pride kept you from full on sobs,a total breakdown was on it’s way without a doubt. You removed your bag from your shoulder,sitting it in the chair by the door and headed to your bedroom. You had graduated from the guest bedroom, to mostly staying in Henry’s bed with him, a convenience thing really. 

“And what is it?” he asked , finally unable to continue being berated by you.

“A mistake.” you said calmly, what had to be mere minutes felt like passing hours, the two of you standing there, looking at eachother, seeing the relationship for what it was. 

He spoke first.

“I love you.” his baritone timbre you had become so accustomed to sounded far away, you questioned if you had even heard him clearly.

“I love you, does that not matter to you at all?”he sounded stern, almost scolding you for not immediately reciprocating his affection.

“It’s not real Hen.” you said between tears “Someone who loves me, wouldn’t need me to explain all the ways his privilege consistently harms me. I wouldn’t have to ask him to donate to causes I’m passionate about, causes I’ve devoted my whole life to getting fundraising for. Someone who loves me would not make party conversation about how their black girlfriend has to sleep with a bonnet on.” He was silent,now. He stepped towards you, closing the void of misunderstanding.

“I'm sorry that I ever made you feel as though you aren’t the most important thing in the world to me.” He kissed your forehead, and then on the top of your head. 

He whispered into your hair but, you could feel his voice reverberating  through your curls.

“Can we not fight tonight ?” You exhaled, relaxing the weight of your body into his. You didn’t have to fight anymore because you heard his answer loud and clear. He didn’t want to fight because he couldn’t.  He could not think of something important enough to cause him discomfort,couldn’t think of anything worth his unhappiness. He placed his hands on either side of your face, pulling you in for a kiss. You kissed him back slowly, making up your mind to give in to your emotions for one last time. A spark went through your body as you felt his hands trail their way over your curves. You tugged at the bottom of his t-shirt and he quickly obliged,pulling it over his head. He lightly pushes you towards the bed and when he rolls ontop of you it feels more like a safety net than a sexual maneuver. Even as he undresses you, slowly, kissing over your body. He touches you so gently,assigning value to every square inch of your skin.Before long he’s looking into your eyes as he thrusts into you, rutting his way  inside you of.Your breath hitches as you begin to synchronize your breathing with his, becoming one, breathing as one whole. He held the backs of your knees, pushing them up further into your chest.You cried out at the depth of the new angle and he smiled, moving a hand from the back of your knee to your neck, lightly applying pressure. You loved his hand around your throat, the way his veins looked, the muscles in his arm , all of it. And he knew that, he was pulling out all of his best moves tonight. 

“You’re so bloody beautiful right now.so tight for me.” He murmured close, into your ear. 

His dirty talk alone sent you over the edge but, the added view, from this angle of his body was everything a partner could want. He moaned as he pushed into you , the result of your walls tightening around him. Your spasms brought him over the edge,as he came into you.You latched your nails onto the skin of his back, clawing for safety in his embrace. 

“I love you. I love you.”he said in between kisses as he came down from the high of physical contact. “I love you too.” you returned the words, because they were true and in that moment, nothing could have been more honest.He rolled over onto his back and you snuggled up next to him.

“I do love you” he whispers into your hair. The room is dark,aside from a sliver of light where the moon shone through the blinds. He slowly runs a hand over your hair and down your back.

“Then why haven’t I met your parents yet?” you sighed,turning your head upwards to face him.

The loudest silence of the night fell over the room, that was what made it real to him. He couldn’t deny it anymore. Even he knew, he had never invited you to visit his family, or even out to dinner when they were visiting in the states. You didn’t know if it was that he was embarrassed , or that he just didn’t know how to tell them. You weren’t even upset anymore, as much as you were resigned to the fact that you had to begin putting yourself first, to choose your needs first. And whether you wanted to admit it or not, if you were honest with yourself you knew he wasn’t the one. His brows furrowed and you could tell he was running through every possible response. His hand smoothed it’s way over your hair again and while you had resigned to the fact that it was over you couldn’t help but allow a piece of your heart to break as you saw his eyes become glassy. 

Before long he was fast asleep above you. Henry would be leaving the show, for another movie gig in two weeks but, since the  first rehearsal you hadn’t spent a day without Henry, or Kal for that matter. Sun peeked through the shades as you redressed yourself in the dark , you couldn’t be sure if this was something you wanted, or simply something you knew you had to do. You looked back at that beautiful apartment one more time,and then finally closed the door behind you. You recall the first time you entered the building, that day you had been instructed to bond as you step into the elevator. Watching the city below through the glass,a flicker of light catches your attention, then another and you realize it’s snowing. It had been a full year since the first time you had actually spoken to him. The doorman held the door for you,as you sparked your lighter. Touching the flame to the end of your cig as you stroll down the street.

[omniscientwreck]

Some of the best things to come out of me and my roommate's high school AU conversation:

- Caleb is a quiet nerd who spends most of high school denying party invitations to study, he's taking AP classes and doing university prep constantly

- Beau skipped from grade 4 to 6, she's the student who's involved in so many things nobody has any idea when she sleeps

- Veth is the single meanest person in the school except for to Caleb and this nerd Yeza who she met because they were lab partners in AP chemistry

- Mollymauk has been at the school for forever, he's failed every single class not because he isn't smart but just because he can't be in the right place at the right time. When he has English he's hanging out in the band room but when he has art he's in History class.

- Essek Thelyss plays clarinet and oboe. He listens to Baroque music and is incredibly pretentious about the superiority of both JS and CPE Bach to any Romantic era composer. He also likes New Wave. He does have a secret playlist on Spotify full of Carly Rae Jepsen, Lady Gaga, and Brittney Spears.

- Fjord is on the football team and nobody knows why, least of all him. He tries out for the school musical as a joke in the 11th grade and finds out he's actually really good at singing and enjoys it.

- Caduceus Clay graduated a few years ago but he comes back to visit teachers and the Nein who he made friends with often. If an adult is ever needed the Nein call him and he's always there within 5 minutes

- Yasha had a rough time with puberty and went through a phase where she was very angry and reclusive and alienated herself from her previous friends. Now that she's found the Nein she's more outgoing and the sweetest person you'll ever meet. She walks absolutely everywhere and somehow always arrives before everyone else.

- Jester Lavorre is everyone's friend it doesn't matter who you are she probably knows your name and at least one thing about you. She's the stereotypical art student who seems to be friends with the art teacher but it's not at all inappropriate. She's a master of bathroom graffiti and even though everyone knows it's her she's never been caught.

- When they talk about the dangers of weed in health class the teacher is going through slang terms for it, one of which is Uk'otoa which becomes a meme with the class.

- Nobody has ever seen Mollymauk Tealeaf arrive to a party. When the energy shifts from 'nobody is drunk and everyone's a little awkward' to 'we've had a couple drinks and everyone is having a great time' you'll know he's there. You just turn around and he'll wave at you from another conversation he's having.

- When Caleb finally does start going to parties you can almost always find him arguing with Yussa over some matter of academia. It ends with them in the backyard doing dangerous magical stunts and getting hurt. Essek sometimes tries to referee but often gets sucked into the showboating.

- Whenever there's a bake sale Yasha and Jester collaborate on dozens of different desserts and they always sell out immediately.

- Beauregard plays auxillary percussion in band because playing only one instrument isn't enough for her brain.

- Mollymauk can technically drive and he does frequently, his car is always inches from a breakdown and he frequently gets distracted. Fjord is a great driver and owns a truck for no discernable reason. If Caleb ends up driving he usually dissociates into the middle distance, not dangerous just not as fun.

- Pumat Sol is the shops teacher that everybody loves. Kids will take shops specifically to hang out with him and make cool shit.

- Beauregard frequently gets in trouble for calling teachers fascists in class and Essek always agrees with her.

- If Beau and Essek are in an English class together they will often overtake the class with an argument. Essek reading into gay subtext, Beau reading into capitalism critique subtext, and Caleb trying to explain why they're both right. The Great Gatsby was a nightmare.

- Beau and Yasha spend ages flirting before finally making out at a party at which neither are drunk. They then go on to found the queer students club and are elected prom queens.

- One time Caleb expresses mild interest in learning a woodwind instruments and joining band. Essek adjusts his schedule to be five minutes late leaving class in case Caleb ever takes him up on his offer to teach him.

- Fjord and Veth are ruthlessly cruel to each other and anyone who doesn't know them would think they hated each other. However, there's a theatre kid named Marius Lepual who they both despise and frequently team up against.

- Molly and Essek run the school's rumor mill. They do a good job of telling Jester or Beth exactly the right tidbit of information to have things blown wildly out of proportion. By the end of any given week there are 5 different versions of the same rumor spreading and nobody knows what's true.

- Jester decides the group chat names.

- One time Yussa and Caleb end up making out at a party when Essek isn't there. He gets jealous and doesn't speak with either of them for two weeks.

- Jester's parents are the ones who will buy the alcohol as long as they promise to drink at home or call them if anything goes wrong.

- Astrid and Eadwulf have been Caleb's friends from middle school. They abruptly transfer to a different school across the city during grade 11 and Caleb is eventually adopted by Jester and Veth and inducted to the Nein after Jester dances with him at a school dance because he's sitting all by himself.

- Molly's catchphrase is 'i have a guy' and he can get anything. Your car ran out of gas at 3am and no stations are open? He'll be there in 15 minutes with a jerry can. You need a paper for 12th grade English on Catcher in the Rye? Give him a day.

- Mario Kart tournaments always devolve into Veth and one other member. Controllers have been thrown and friendships nearly ruined over blue shells.

- The year the Nein graduate the staff are so worried about their senior prank that they nearly cancel class. The prank doesn't happen and they're lulled into a false sense of security until the next fall when they retroactively pull off the most elaborate prank in the schools history.

- When the rest of the Nein are in the 11th grade Molly just fucks off for a year. None of them know where he went, they keep receiving oddly nondescript postcards telling them he's fine and having a blast. When he returns the next summer all he says when they ask where he was is "don't worry about it"

[cyber3lf]

in another world

say it back sequel

˖⋆࿐໋₊ ✎ synopsis: it has been two years since your last encounter with oikawa. you thought he was gone for good, buried deep in the past, and will just live in your mind as a faint memory but unfortunately, you were far from being right with that statement.

pairing: oikawa x fem. reader

genre: angst angst angst

word count: 2.4k

warnings: cringe, sappy stuff LOL don’t come @ me

*unedited

.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇

you didn’t know how you got yourself into this mess. how you let kuroo drag you to his dumb party that he hosted. who throws a reunion party and invites their team’s rivals? besides the point, there were more people than you had expected. you scanned your eyes observing the room filled with people having a good time. the flashing lights were hurting your eyes a bit but you got used to it. although, it was hard to make out the people’s faces since of the horrible flickering colored lights.

“cmon, let me introduce you to some people,” kuroo grabbed you by the wrist so you wouldn’t lose your way in the crowd. you gave in at first and let him drag you around but as the bright tinted illumination beamed across the room your eyes widened when the source hit a nostalgic figure you thought would be long gone from your world, let alone be in the same room as you. you stopped in your tracks, eyes widened in horror and a rush of anxiousness ran down your body.

“what the hell is he doing here?” you couldn’t help but think to yourself. you have been content for two years and suddenly your ex appeared out of nowhere. ever since your last contact with oikawa, you had been miserable for a long time. nothing was able to bring you out of your misery. you despised him and felt bitterness in your nerves when someone would mention his name in a conversation. you hated him. but you couldn’t blame him for everything he has done. of course you had to take some credit. your foolishness and feelings has gotten the best of you. even after that date you thought maybe he would come up to you and apologize. yet you were so far from that concept. however, the universe eventually showed sympathy towards you and gave you signs that you were better off without him. in other words, you were just hit with a fat reality check that you and oikawa were never meant to be. conceivably in another world or in other cases just a figment of your imagination.

“and this is lev. you know lev right…” kuroo’s voice trailed off, noticing that you weren’t paying attention to what he was saying for the past 10 minutes. “y/n what the hell. did you listen to what i was just saying?”

“huh?” you snapped back, your attention turning back on kuroo who had a very irritated look on his face, crossing his arms and tapping his finger. “yes i was.” you retorted to your tall friend.

“ok who was the last person i just introduced you to?” kuroo bickered back.

“tori nakamoto?” kuroo kicked you in the leg, “ow! what was that for?”

“what is the matter with you? why are you so off tonight? loosen up.” kuroo complained. at times you would act like this, not listening to what your best friend was saying and wandering off to dreamland or play vigorous, humiliating thoughts from your past. like just now.

you rolled your eyes and apologized under your breath. you hoped that whatever you just saw was just your imagination. nevertheless, you still glanced over in the direction you last saw the figure. you were about to turn your head away and a let out a small gasp but you weren’t quick enough to turn your attention back to what kuroo was saying. and as cheesy as this sounds, your eyes locked with him for three lengthy seconds. “it was like the room was lit up again” is what you would have thought two years ago.

‧̍̊˙˚˙ᵕ꒳ᵕ˙˚˙　

oikawa was in much shock as you were. probably even more shocked. he couldn’t believe he would ever see you again. and quite frankly, he wanted to see you again. more than anything in this world. after your guys’ last encounter, he brushed off the feeling of these perplexed thoughts of not pulling you back in, holding you tightly and kiss you. anywhere. even if it wasn’t on your soft, full lips. but needless to say, there were more fishes in the sea. hundreds of them and he attracted a lot of them. and obviously, like the guy oikawa was, he took as many girls out as he could until he felt the satisfying warm energy they equally radiated as you did when he was with you. it was one after another and no one could meet the expectation he held. oikawa was a determined man however, and he was not about to give up. and no matter how many girls he came up to ask them out, oikawa couldn’t bring himself to even spare you a glance let alone talk to you. he wanted to explain himself. about how shitty of a boyfriend he was in the past couple weeks, why he treated you the way he did, and how he was wrong for taking his anger out all on you and pushed you away especially times when you needed him the most.

he didn’t realize it until the day of graduation day that he wanted nothing more in this world but to be with you, wake up by your side, hugging you and smell your rose-like scent, comb your hair with his hands, taking out all of the tangles and listen to everything you had to say whether it was you ranting about something ridiculous or about how great your day went. oikawa had to talk to you, even if he had to think twice about what he was getting himself into.

‧̍̊˙˚˙ᵕ꒳ᵕ˙˚˙　

“kuroo… uh,” you started, looking back to see if oikawa was staying where he was at and just to your dismay, the lean figure was walking in your direction. “kuroo, kuroo, kuroo,” you tapped your friend’s shoulder, eagerly trying to get his attention.

“what the hell do you want woman,” kuroo almost spat out his drink.

“where’s the bathroom?” you asked smiling at him innocently but also in a hurry. you have not been near oikawa since forever and you had planned on keeping it that way.

“around the corner on your left…” kuroo described suspiciously. “hurry though, i have more people i want you to meet.”

“in your dreams kuroo,” you rolled your eyes and sped through the crowds almost tripping three times on your way to the restroom. man was this party packed or what? on your way, you grabbed a slice of cake and locked yourself in the tight, small room. you waited for a solid 10 minutes until you couldn’t handle the claustrophobic atmosphere and opened the door quickly while checking both ways for any brunette with shaggy like hair before you could come out of your hiding.

“are you gonna plan on avoiding from me forever?” a familiar cocky voice piped up. oikawa.

“i had to use the restroom,” you muttered under your breath, not looking in his direction, and wanting to roll your eyes in disgust. you got up quickly and headed in the opposite direction from where he came from but you weren’t quick enough. he grabbed you by your wrist and dragged you towards the direction you were just about to head towards. you were stubborn and tried to loosen his grip but he was stronger.

“oikawa let go,” you pleaded, trying not to sound weak but more rather annoyed and irritated. he wanted nothing to do with you and now he’s trying to get you alone with him. after more fussing about letting you go, oikawa did. but he lead you guys up to a room and shut the door. “what the hell do you want?” your question sounded more like an order, although you rather much not want to hear about it and move on from here. but before you could say anything else, your former lover sat down on the bed and pulled you into a hug making you sit down next to him. your heart raced at an incredible speed.

“please,” oikawa started, “can we stay like this for a bit?” he buried his face in the crook of your neck. although you were very upset that a jerk like him who happened to date you in highschool, ghosted you out of nowhere, and now just started to talk to you out of nowhere, you decided to stay for his sake.

“i’m sorry,” oikawa apologized, “i missed you so much.” he looked up at you, now cupping your face with his hands examining all the details on your face with the moonlight shining in through the windows with meticulousness and held it with so much care like you were fragile.

“bullshit,” you snapped back at him, striking lightly at his hands to get him to stop touching you. if he was really sorry, he would’ve stopped you from leaving on the day at the amusement park. you know. if he was really sorry, he would’ve texted back that night. if he was really sorry, he would’ve called and asked for a reschedule for another date. if he was really sorry, he would’ve changed his poor attitude towards you as a boyfriend and acted like a real one. you wanted the oikawa you first fell in love with again. but nothing is perfect and will go as planned in life. and your relationship with him was one of them.

“i mean it, y/n” oikawa said, lifting his head up and meeting your eyes, his tone of voice getting more and more serious as he spoke, “ever since you left i couldn’t stop thinking about you. and i know this is so sappy and mushy for you to hear but i really, really mean it. and i know i haven’t been the best boyfriend you could’ve asked for yet i still want to be with you. i miss your touch and voice--”

“then why didn’t you say so sooner?” you asked quietly. this time, wanting to know the answer. you looked down at your feet while saying this to hold back tears. you were frustrated to say at the very least. who wouldn’t be?

“huh? i’m sorry i couldn’t catch what you were trying to say--”

“THEN WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY SO SOONER, OIKAWA?” along with shouting, tears streamed down at your face, making the mascara you were wearing, run a little around your eyes while you were wiping it. and as for oikawa, he was startled by your blaring attitude. you weren’t ever like this especially not towards him. but what could he have expected? and although you were physically the one who left him, he emotionally left you first which hurts just as much, if not more.

“you know what, if you ARE really sorry you wouldn’t have shut me out when i’m trying to talk to you. if you ARE really sorry, you would’ve texted me back that night after i left, if you ARE really sorry and want anything to do with me again you would’ve tried to hold our relationship together, if you ARE really sorry--” but you didn’t get the chance to finish as you were ranting on about how dense and ignorant he was in the past and how he still is because now, you felt a pair of soft, delicate lips crashed onto yours.

you wanted to resist. push back and slap him for doing what he did but you couldn’t bring yourself to it. instead, you closed your eyes and kissed him back and found yourself wanting more of this forbidden fruit you thought you would and should never get to taste again. you slowly brought your hands to his neck and hinted at him that he can continue. you don’t know if the act of you kissing him back was through lust or love. but it didn’t matter to you at that very moment. you just wanted him. your lips were moving in sync to his movements. abruptly, he grabbed you by your waist and pulled you closer until you were on his lap. every second, your breath was shared between one another as he bit your bottom lip every now and then, the both of your guys’ hands tangled up in one another’s touch. you ran your hands through his thick brown toned hair and a tear slipped down on your cheek. you missed his touch so much, yet after some time of repeated, heated actions, you couldn’t bear this anymore. you knew it was wrong. if anything, doing any more intimate stuff with him could lead you back to square one. you worked so hard trying to bring your mental health back up and you weren’t going to let him ruin it again. you had to cut him off and right now is the right time.

“oikawa,” you tried pulling away from his touch but his grip on your waist increased. “oikawa stop. really,” you said again, raising your tone of voice. the kiss deepened. “oikawa.” your harsh voice came out like a snap rather than a warning. this time, oikawa stopped and stared right into your glossy orbs giving you the sign that he has his full attention on you. you noticed that in the corner of his eyes there was a small tear merely planted on his lashes. he wanted to cry which made you more guilty saying what you had to say, “i can't do this,”

“y/n—”

“no. oikawa. move on. you know staying together is only going to hurt the both of us. so please just move on,” now it was you again with tears in your eyes.

“please just give me another chance. i want to do better for you. you’re the only who can truly make me happy please y/n.” during your two years of maturing mentally, you could tell the words that rolled off of his lips meant nothing but lies.

“i have to go. it’s getting late,” you got up and walked out of the door without looking back and somewhere deep down, you were hoping he would pull you back and stop you unlike two years ago. and sure enough he never stopped you this time either. but nothing would anyways. not even after he finally said “i love you” as you closed the door on your way out.

“maybe in another world we were meant to be. just not this one.”

a/n: PLS THIS IS SO CRINGEY IM SORRY FOR BEING ALL MUSHY XJXJ

edit: also privating this if it flops until i find the motivation to undergo MAJOR editingT_T

[blackstonesandtrapnest]

hiii i hope you’ve been well!!! 🥺🥺💖💖 could i request headcanons for seto kaiba falling in love with a female reader who works at kaibacorp?? i’m so sorry if you’ve already gotten this request i just thought it was really cute 😭😭 but thank you and have a wonderful day/night!!! 💙💙💕💕

No problem :) I can gladly do this for ya! ^_^ Seto falling in love regardless is cute isn’t it? He needs someone to hold him and give him the love he desperately needs! I hope you have an awesome weekend ^_^

Seto's first impression of you will be from your resume and how you conduct yourself during the interview. If he likes what he sees and hears, you'll not only have the job but his interest and that's not easy to catch.

The way Seto shows his interest is so subtle that no one will notice except for Mokuba. He takes whatever you say into consideration, he gives you constructive criticism about your work, and he'll do little things that make your work day much better.

Seto admitting that he's in love with you (or even likes you for that matter) is a huge process in itself. He'll deny, deflect, and deny some more and if you tease him about it, expect some extra work and pettiness to boot. All in good fun at KaibaCorp! If you really wanna impress Seto, pull some Malicious Compliance or even Petty Revenge on him. You might even manage to get a smile from him and definitely some laughter from Mokuba!

Unfortunately there will be some obstacles with your budding, slow-burn relationship. The biggest one being that Seto is still your boss at the end of the day and he does NOT want to deal with any drama or lawsuits heading his way which is why he doesn't approach you. This will definitely make or break things between you two and the tension will definitely be building beyond epic proportions! Small touches, lingering looks, and after-hours small talk will just be the tip of the iceburg.

How and when the tension explodes depends on your position at the company and how close your job allows you to get to Seto. If you're in a higher position such as a supervisor or HR, it'll be at a company party or ball. If you're in a lower position like a secretary or assistant, it'll be in his office after hours. Your relationship will definitely be made official after that steamy, sex-filled night!

Your relationship with Seto will generally be under wraps for obvious reasons especially if you plan on being at KaibaCorp for the long-term. But people do talk and rumors will be circulating around about your relationship no matter how hard you two try to stay secretive. Seto won't give a shit about what people say but if the rumors get out of hand, he'll put a stop to it and will fire people if necessary.

Just because you're dating Seto doesn't mean you'll get any special treatment! You'll still be treated like a normal employee and you gotta abide by the rules like everybody else. Seto absolutely despises nepotism and it will NOT be tolerated at KaibaCorp! If anything, he'll probably be harder on you than the other employees. Not by much but it'll be noticeable to Mokuba and anyone else who's more perceptive than most.

Office sex anyone? Did you really expect anything less? Most of your sexual encounters with Seto will happen at KaibaCorp without a doubt. Whether it's in his office, your office, or in a damn closet, you're definitely getting fucked at work! Having good sex and getting paid for it? Sign me up!

If you're only at KaibaCorp for a limited amount of time (paying for college for example), your relationship with Seto will definitely be more public once you graduate and resign from the company. If you remain at KaibaCorp permanently, then your relationship will be an open secret at best. If you want things to be more public, Seto isn't gonna stop you and will actually be relieved. Sneaking around can get quite tiring!

You two will definitely be the talk of KaibaCorp and whether you go along with it or deny everything, your love story with Seto will forever etched in the company's history!

[popwasabi]

“End of Evangelion” and the tempting nature of oblivion

(TW: Suicide, Self-harm, Pain, Depression, Mental Health, Death)

“End of Evangelion” is a perplexing movie to say the least.

Not that the original classic anime “Neon Genesis Evangelion” series ends on exactly the most conclusive note itself, but “End” takes everything that transpired in the series and literally destroys it.

The films ends with Earth experiencing the long foreshadowed Third Impact and all of the planet returning to the primordial “soup,” as fans call it, with its main protagonist Shinji Ikari and comrade Asuka Langley Soryu as the only remaining humans left. A pseudo, twisted rebeginning of Adam and Eve’s Genesis.

The film is fairly divisive among the fans to say the least. Some fans consider it a masterpiece for its nihilistic tone and mind-bending illustrations of body horror and others despised it for being too dark and confusing with no clear explanation of anything that happened in the film’s events. Hell, even the movie’s fans have a difficult time explaining what exactly happens in the narrative.

I was somewhat in the middle with it after I watched it the first time not super long ago. It was certainly abstract, and I like plenty of stories that don’t make it easy for me to understand. The animation is definitely the franchise’s best and I enjoyed the character moments between Shinji, Asuka, and Misato. But it was also, as stated before, dreadfully confusing and still to this day hard to makes heads or tails out of with its plot.

But, as with more than a few movies I have revisited this year, 2020 helped me contextualize one aspect I think the story is concretely trying to get across.

(We’ll save discussion of “Rebuild” for another day...)

At my lowest points not long ago, I had this frequent vision that would crawl across my mind.

I imagined being up in the clouds on a beautiful sunny day, but I wasn’t floating or flying. I was plummeting, falling like a bird without wings at a speed that would definitely kill me once I got to the ground. But I never imagined actually hitting the Earth like a meat-bagged, human sized asteroid. I only ever imagined the falling part. The wind reaching a terminal velocity and the air rushing past my body and you know what look I had on my face?

Happiness.

I was confused a bit by why I kept imagining this moribund fall into oblivion over and over again. I wasn’t suicidal, though I certainly have had thoughts of self-harm plenty of times before and general detachment from life. But why the fuck was I so happy? I’m about to die after all!

What I have come to realize in recent years, as I’ve developed a better understanding of my mental health and what makes me tick, it wasn’t that I wanted to die so much as I wanted the freedom that comes moments before it. The feeling of finally letting go and letting fate/gravity do the rest.

Years of my life failing at various aspects of societal expectations and career obligations from not being able to get the girls I wanted to date so badly, relationships ending poorly, not quite applying myself the way I should’ve in college, and working a plethora of unfulfilling jobs since graduation made me yearn for that release. Just that feeling of saying “fuck it all” and giving in to the void.

I wanted to stop feeling out of control. The way the world is structured often feels like you are on a wild, rapid river flowing in one very stark direction but you desperately want to go the other way. You keep fighting and fighting it and realize after a while you are just swimming in place, you tire out and either float where the river wants you to go or you drown. I wanted neither of those things, I just wanted control and unfortunately part of life is accepting that a very large percentage of it is beyond your power to alter.

2020 made this feeling starkly apparent once again as we were hit with a once in a lifetime global pandemic that has killed 2.21 million people and counting. As common people struggle to find ways to handle the loss of loved ones and the fallout from economic instability those tasked with protecting us have more or less ignored the cries of needy. Hell, they’re fucking miffed that we would even have the audacity to ask for $2000 of our own fucking tax dollars to put a band-aid on the situation. Combine this with an extremely volatile two-party system and late stage capitalism, we are about as out of control as ever in terms of how much we actually can course correct our destinies in a period like this.

It is why so many irony-pilled millennials and gen z-ers are posting dank memes about meteors colliding with the earth over the course of the year. We’ve lived through two recessions, two forever wars, and now a pandemic in our lifetimes while paying off our crippling debt with slave wages and yet boomers still wonder why we are near universally depressed as a generation.

(Seriously, everybody needs a fucking therapist right now...and also to dismantle the fucking system that’s making us depressed!)

This is what I feel is the real heart of “End of Evangelion.” The movie is a lot of things, obviously, but, after the events of this year and looking back on the more depressing parts of my life, I feel this film is about the tempting nature of oblivion. Giving up when things are clearly beyond your control so you can get that sweet but twisted, fleeting sense of freedom from it all.

Director Hideaki Anno didn’t feel too entirely different about the state of life when he made this series and certainly by the time he made “End” he was in a very dark place.

So, quick history lesson, “Neon Genesis Evangelion” debuted in 1994 and quickly became a classic among fans of anime and the giant mech vs monster genre. Critics loved it for its exploration of mental health and depression and of course plenty enjoyed the hell out of it for its giant monster/robot escapism as well. Fast forward to the conclusion of the series, critics and fans especially are far more polarized. I won’t try to explain exactly what happens in the ending and frankly I don’t think anyone can, but that confusion led to quite a bit of outcry by the fans.

Hideaki Anno, the series’ director, received tons of hate mail and death threats following the series conclusion. The fans hated how abstract it was, how it had an undecisive ending and chose to dive into the mind of Shinji instead of conclusively describing the events of the Third Impact with plenty going as far as to say he had “ruined” his own series for them. This made him unfortunately quite depressed himself over the ending he felt creatively fairly content with.

(I think it should be clear who Shinji is mostly likely a stand-in for in this anime...)

The fan reaction was toxic to say the least and all too familiar for many creatives who didn’t adequately satisfy the insatiable vapid needs of their fandom. Anno did not take this well to put it lightly. A man who was known as a delinquent in high school and expelled from the Osaka University of Arts much earlier in his life, and dealt plenty with his own bouts of depression, Anno had plenty of his own demons to sort out and quite clearly wanted to explore that mental state in “Neon Genesis Evangelion.”

I’ll be honest and say that I myself was not fond of the ending either when I watched it the first time as a freshman in college, and even went as far as to describe it as everything that was wrong with anime to friends in the years that followed for a while. I felt it was confusing and “fake deep,” existential for no reason other than because it just wanted to and people were “dumb” if they liked it.

When I rewatched it again as a much older adult when it came on Netflix last year, I found it much more fascinating and interesting. A sort of abstract introspective into the mind of a troubled teenager, who I had written off many years prior as a “whiny baby.” Though I wouldn’t say I completely understand it still, I get it much more now and I think it has a lot to say about depression and mental health.

Unfortunately, most fans did not have that reaction back then and as a result Anno made his true conclusion “End of Evangelion” as a response to that negativity.

(You’re welcome, nerds.)

As mentioned before, “End of Evangelion” is an extremely nihilistic film that seems to one up each dark moment as you traverse its spiraling narrative. It’s a film where things never get better. If you go into it blind expecting that big last minute heroic save the day moment, it’s always teased and never comes. Things just end very badly for everyone. Nobody gets a “happy ending.”

While the ending to the original series is strange for sure, it does end on a light note that can be interpreted in a number of different ways but ultimately positive. With the way fans reacted to it Anno decided to write a big “fuck you” to them by, in many ways, smashing his toys so no one could play with them again. He even went as far as to splice in the actual hate mail he received into the movie to quite clearly show to the audience, as their favorite characters met their grissly ends, that this was their fault.

(“Gee, I wonder what that was all about.” ~ a fan walking out of the theater back in 1997.)

In a way though, Anno created something strangely beautiful from that reaction. “End of Evangelion” is about giving up in some ways and accepting our inevitable doom. There are no easy answers, no workable solutions to achieve a happy ending because sometimes in life there isn’t one. Despite last ditch efforts by Misato, Shinji, and the crew of NERV the world still ends through the Third Impact. But tonally it’s not quite pessimistic; it’s actually positive, in a very twisted sense of course.

Set to the song “Komm Susser Tod” by ARIANNE, the film’s apocalypse can almost be described as a celebration. With people “popping” and turning into the primordial soup they all largely have smiles on their faces as they kind of get what they want whether it’s a desire to reunite with loved ones, to be with people they have crushes on, or happiness that they have sought for so long in the embrace of others. Everyone’s depressed! But now they are happy because it’s finally all over, they don’t have to give a shit anymore.

As the planet lights up like a Christmas tree, there are images of suicide and death that rapidly cross the screen in the form of the Angel’s final transformation but again, nobody is truly sad about it. They all have some kind of twisted smile or joy that they get from it. It’s a shocking film, if you’re not already prepared for what’s going to happen, and provocative to say the least.

(Can’t decide if I recommend watching this high or not...)

I had no idea what any of it meant at the time when I watched it several years ago (I watched it well after I had seen the original series), and to be fair there are many ways fans have interpreted what exactly took place in the film and have debated endlessly on its meaning for decades now. But at least in my interpretation, after everything we’ve been through this year, “End of Evangelion” to me is about the sweet release of not giving a fuck anymore.

Whether it’s about Anno feeling that way about his own life or the expectations of his fans or both, the film quite clearly doesn’t care about what people may or may not have wanted for Shinji and the NGE characters and is perfectly fine with the way it all comes “tumbling down.”

(He just wants to be with his boyfriend, guys.)

This past July 4th, city fireworks shows were prohibited in my area because they wanted to limit mass gatherings due to COVID but this didn’t stop people from buying plenty of their own to fire off. In what amounted to a collective “fuck you” to everything and 2020, beginning pretty much exactly at dusk people started firing off their at home lightshows like they were mortar gunners in World War I and did not let up until well past midnight. The entire Southern California night sky was lit up not to unlike the thousands of crosses that filled the screen during the Third Impact of “End of Evangelion” and though it could certainly be interpreted as a moment of people patriotically going “Yea, America!” that night, my head canon was much different. It felt like tens of thousands of people across the region just saying “Fuck it” into the night sky at everything; COVID, our horrendous government, police violence, pending World Wars, environmental disaster, and our collective impending doom from it all.

As these fireworks hit their zenith around 9pm I broke out my phone and started playing “Komm Susser Tod” from the movie and it felt perfect. Everyone just wanted to feel that freedom in the moment, that freedom of not giving a damn anymore. To be removed from expectations, from control, from hatred, from pain and it was kind of beautiful in a sick way.

And that’s what “End of Evangelion” feels like to me now; kind of beautiful in a sick way.

(Not saying the LA skyline looked like this exactly but it felt like it haha...)

There are still many ways to interpret Hideaki Anno’s cult classic, and it’s part of its charm but I think the take away fans should have is definitely not that suicide is ok but that we get it. We understand why people have those feelings and why it feels freeing to desire the void and oblivion. It’s a pity that the series most toxic fans didn’t get that clue through the original finale but Anno, not a person who likes  being shoved around, clearly created perhaps the most twistedly beautiful “fuck you” to that in anime history.

As we enter 2021 all I can say is it’s ok to feel like this, it’s ok to desire freedom from the relentless gloom and doom of the world and people’s prying expectations of what they think you “should” be. No one blames you. At the end of the day, we’re all just trying to survive the apocalypse we have zero control over, so the least we can do is be a bit nicer and considerate of one another. 

At least it’ll make the Third Impact more pleasant whenever it eventually comes...

Happy New Year, everyone! 

Congratulations on surviving 2020! Have fun in 2021...

[hopelikethemoon]

Reunion Part 2 (Javier x Reader) {MTMF}

Title: Reunion (Part 2) Rating: PG-13 Length: 1400 Warnings: None Notes: You can find everything about Maybe Today, Maybe Forever here. Set December 24th 1998. Part 2 of yesterday’s update. And a shorty, because I was working on my room all day. Unbeta’d because we ride like warriors.  Summary: Mitch and co. enjoy dinner with Reader and her family

@grapemama @seawhisperer @huliabitch @pedropascalito @rogrsnbarnes@thewallpapergoesorido @twomoonstwosuns @gooddaykate @livasaurasrex @ham4arrow@plexflexico @readsalot73 @hdlynn @lokiaddicted @randomness501 @fioccodineveautunnale  @roxypeanut @snivellusim @lukesrighthand @historynerd04 @mrsparknuts@synystersilenceinblacknwhite @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @exrebelshocktrooper@awesomefandomsunited @ah-callie @swhiskeys @lady-tano @u-wakatoshii @space-floozy @cable-kenobi @cool-ultra-nerd @himbopoes @findhimfives @pedrosdoll @frietiemeloen@arrowswithwifi @random066 @uncomicalhumour @heather-lynn @domino-oh-damn @cyarikaaa @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @im-still-a-pieceofgarbage @ksgeekgirl​  @yabby-girl​ @xqueenofthecraziesx @punkass-potato @coredrive​ @pascalesque​@theduchessofkirkcaldy @queenquazar @sabinemorans​ @buckstaposition​ @holkaskrosnou​@yespolkadotkitty​ @fleetwoodmactshirt​ @seeking-a-great–perhaps @kochamcie​ @jaime1110​

The afternoon had gone smoothly. Catching up with Mitch had proven easier than you had expected it to go. He was an easy going guy, but you had still been nervous about revisiting those parts of your past. 

You and Connie helped Chucho with dinner, which proved to be a bit of a smorgasbord of different side dishes and choices. Proof of the blended nature of your families. 

“What is it that you do, Monica?” Darla questioned as she primly forked up a bite of the brussel sprouts that Connie had brought. 

“Well, I’m a student right now.” Monica answered, wiping at her mouth. “I graduate in May.”

“Oh, that’s right.” She nodded. “Have you decided what you plan on pursuing after graduation?”

“I’m considering law school.”

“She’s incredibly smart,” You boasted. “She’s got the drive, passion, and intellect to really go places.”

Javier was quick to add on after you, “She’s top of the class. She puts a hundred and twenty into every project.”

Monica rubbed at her cheeks, “Guys, come on. You’re going to make me turn into a puddle.”

Nadia nudged her, “She’s brilliant and humble. A winning combination.”

“And what are you studying?” Mitch questioned. 

“Already graduated.” Nadia explained, “I’m working at NASA. My internship transitioned into a full time job.”

“NASA?” Mitch pursed his lips approvingly. “That’s pretty impressive.”

“I’m gonna go to space!” Josie announced, shoving a piece of bread into her mouth. 

“Please don’t choke.” You chastised her gently, “I thought you were going to wrangle dinosaurs.”

“In space.” She said as she chewed.

“Mouth closed.” Javier tapped her arm to get her attention before giving her a stern look. “Manners.”

She stuck her tongue out.

Mitch laughed, “Someone’s a spitfire.”

“We have our hands full,” You shook your head, taking a swig of your beer. “And someone is going to go to bed without dessert.” You warned Josie.

“So, Tate,” Javier cleared his throat and took a swig of beer. “Still in college or thrust into the job field?”

“Fortunately, I’m done with college.” Tate offered. “I recently got hired at a big architectural firm in the city. Mostly working as a consultant on a few rehabs downtown.”

Javier nodded with interest, “I had a friend in college who went on to become a pretty successful architect. Designed a bunch of the Holiday Inns in Texas.”

“That’s a sweet gig if you can land it,” Tate agreed. “Architecture sort of fell into my lap.”

Darla coughed politely, “Tate had initially attended Syracuse.”

“That’s a big party school, isn’t it?” Nadia questioned and the face Tate made in response was answer enough. 

“We got him transferred back home sophomore year. Temple.” Darla shrugged. “The head of the architecture program’s wife is a dear friend of mine. We serve on the DAR board together. She put in a good word for Tate.”

“Fortunately,” Tate shifted in his seat nervously. “I enjoy it. I always loved building tracks and Lego models.” He shrugged. “So, uh… what do you both teach?”

“I’m not teaching yet,” You answered, as you watched Mitch converse with Chucho to his left. “But it’ll be an elective in the criminology course at UM.”

“They’ve got me teaching a handful of courses,” Javier explained. “The thing people fail to recognize is just how much government overreach and bureaucratic bull you have to put up with if you wanna go into a field like the DEA.”

Steve leaned forward, resting his arms on the table. “It’s not for the faint of heart. I just got out myself. Starting up my own consulting business.” He shrugged. “The government doesn’t care about the people affected by the narcos. Just look at what the US did to Mexico.”

You watched Javier then, searching his expression for any signs of discomfort. You knew he despised bringing up Colombia — but these last few months had made it impossible. 

“Is Santa in Mexico?” Josie questioned.

Chucho clicked his tongue against his teeth, “I bet he is. You gonna be good the rest of the night so I don’t have to tell him to fly by?”

“I’m a good girl.”

“I know you are.” Chucho winked at her. “But you’ve gotta be good right up until the moment he shows up… and then for a whole year after he’s gone!”

“Is Sofía going to be on the good list?” She looked at her sister then. “Sissy cries a lot.”

Javier leaned over and kissed the top of her head, “I have it on good authority that both of you are on the good list. Right alongside Emily and Olivia.”

Monica dropped her voice, “I heard that even Nadia was on the good list.”

“Speaking of the good list,” Nadia gave Monica a look, “My momma’s going to be expecting us soon.”

“Oh? Are you still going?”

“Yeah,” Nadia shrugged. “She’s still a little iffy with the whole girlfriend thing, but I think she’s coming around.”

“I’m glad. Still coming over tomorrow afternoon?”

“Wouldn’t miss it,” Monica beamed, clearing off their dishes. “Mitch, Darla, Tate — I’ll see you tomorrow. It was a pleasure to meet you.” She looked to Chucho then. “Still need a ride to the hotel?”

“Stephen here offered to give me a ride.”

“Drive safe and have fun.” You called out as they got ready to leave. “See you in the morning.”

“You two have been awfully chatty down there,” Javier pointed out as he gestured between Chucho and Mitch. “Should I be afraid?”

You chuckled, “I wasn’t going to say anything, but… What horror stories are you telling?”

Mitch gave a good natured laugh, “We’re just commiserating on how good it is to see you both happy.”

You smiled warmly, “It’s hard to believe we’ve spent seven Christmases together.”

“More if you count the years prior,” Steve pointed out. 

“Yeah, but you were always trying to pair me off with someone.” You made a face. “Mitch, can you believe these two tried to pair me off with doctors.”

Mitch laughed, “She hated the hospital.”

“I got chickenpox.” You grimaced. “No sixteen year old should have the chickenpox.”

“Well, how was I supposed to know you were in love with Javier?”

You shrugged, “It all worked out in the end.” You reached around Josie to rest your hand on Javier’s shoulder. “Can you get dessert ready, while I get Sofía down?”

“Of course, baby.” Javier nodded, scooting his chair back. 

“I’ll help,” Mitch offered. 

“He’s not bad around the kitchen.” Darla assured you. 

You scooted your chair back and grabbed Sofía out of her high chair, hauling her back to the nursery. 

Sofía was quick to fall asleep, clearly worn out after an afternoon of entertaining everyone. Josie would be quick behind her — you doubted she’d make it past dessert. 

And the sooner they both went to sleep, the sooner you and Javier could put out the gifts from Santa; and drink down the milk and eat the cookies she would leave out for him too. 

Christmas was fun as a parent. 

 ——

 “The bells have been put on Josie’s door, we’ll know if she tries to escape.” Javier told you as he quietly shut the bedroom door behind him and moved to join you in bed.

You rolled over to face him, reaching out to run your hand down his arm. “Do you think she’ll like the bike?”

“She’s been dying for one.” Javier smiled, “Santa did good.” He shifted closer to you, until his lips were mere inches from yours. “What did you get me for Christmas?”

You brushed your nose against his, “You’ll have to be a good boy and wait until the morning,” You teased as you traced your fingers over his cheek. 

“I don’t know if I’ve been good.” He retorted with a smirk as he curled his hand around your hip. 

You cupped his cheek and kissed him. “You were great today. It went so well.”

“That was all you, baby.”

“It was everyone.” You kissed him softly again. “What did you think of Mitch?”

“He’s a hell of a guy. Down to earth despite…” He made a face. “Darla’s loaded, isn’t she?”

You nodded. “Yeah. I mean, our dad was middle class. But Darla is a whole different league.”

“Did you enjoy today!”

“It was so weird to see them again,” You chewed on your bottom lip. “I think I’m going to keep in contact with them.”

“They seem like good people.”

“And I want the girls to know their aunt and uncle. Aside from Steve and Connie. I want them to have a family… a big happy family.”

“I could get used to spending Christmas like this. A full house… a full belly.”

You poked him in the gut, “That's all your pops. He cooks the best holiday dinners.”

“Yeah, he was always good about making the holidays special. You know, we always had these big extended family get togethers around the holidays.” He shrugged. 

“They’re overwhelming, but they’re fun.” You stretched your legs, reaching one over to slot in between his. “Thank you.”

“What for?”

“Being mine.”

Javier missed your forehead. “Merry Christmas, baby.”

You smiled to yourself, remembering the first time he said that to you. 

That photo album had long been filled with photos of the two of you and the family you’d made together. 

[nancewright]

[ NANCY WRIGHT. 26. FEMALE. SHE/HER ] is here! They’ve lived in Silver Lake for [ 2 MONTHS ] and are originally from [ NEW YORK CITY, NY ]. They are a [ WAITRESS AT GOLDEN GRIDDLE ] and in their downtime love [ GIVING SHITTY LIFE ADVICE ] and [ SWAPPING TAGS AT FUNKYTOWN THRIFT ]. They look a lot like [ MAIKA MONROE ] and live [ IN OASIS APTS ].

hi hello, i’m brenna and i absolutely despise writing intros. pls accept this meager offering of a word vom ramble

stats page + pinterest

surface level: nancy is very messy, sometimes rude, and often nude

deep down: ......... that’s still pretty much accurate lmao

born in nevada, her parents first met thanks to a chance encounter while her mom was traveling & researching for an upcoming book. nancy was an unexpected surprise in their lives, but fast-forward five years and they were sealing the deal, getting hitched in new york where her mom had the gaudy, mega wedding of her dreams.

photographic evidence of nancy being an angelic flower girl DOES in fact exist

as an only child, she’s never been super aware of how spoiled she is. doted upon by wealthy grandparents throughout her childhood, running amok in the streets of nyc with her friends all during her teens, and never getting a lecture beyond “you’re grounded!” definitely made nancy feel a little bit like she could get away with murder.

should she ever find herself stuck in Deep Shit ??? well duh, call daddy to save the day!!

she rolled hard with her rebellious streak and refused to acknowledge that there might be “““consequences””” to her ““actions,”” instead taking full advantage of her parents’ combo leniency & constant bickering to sneak out at every turn.

during her junior year, however, nancy was in a minor car crash that resulted in a quick knee surgery and a blossoming love for painkillers.

she milked her oxy script for all that it was worth and her new habit didn’t go entirely unnoticed -- mrs. wright pushed nancy through months of physical therapy appointments, dragged her across the finish line of high school graduation, and then dumped her directly into rehab with the ultimatum to either get clean or be cut-off.

kinda a no-brainer decision, but only the beginning of a snowballing problem

she could get sober in a cushy facility, find her zen during months of therapy, and think up as many master life plans as she wanted, but back in the Real World? where all the choices were ultimately her own? well... nancy sure did like getting high, even if it meant finding cheaper, quicker fixes as time went on

it was her mom who once again caught on, somewhere between rehab stay #2 and #3, and forced nancy onto an even shorter leash by moving her directly into the guestroom of her penthouse, hoping to cut the cycle short and stop her from treading water forever.

no booze, a ban on visitors, and the constantly buzzing presence of her mom...... it shouldn’t have been that big of a surprise when she ran away. literally.

finding out that a friend was visiting family in los angeles, nancy jumped at the chance to tag along. she packed up as much of her stuff (and her moms jnsdkm) as she could before getting outta dodge, making a brief pitstop at her dad’s place to leave her dog in his care and a vague note to assure her well-being.

it’s been two months since she settled in silver lake, renting a crappy little one bedroom at oasis & securing a waitressing gig, and a tentative ten months since she dipped her toes into the opioid pool.

always picking up random hobbies to try and keep herself busy, though they rarely last. the latest is tie dye and bleaching clothes, so you can bet that she has a lot of random shit hanging from her apt balcony to dry

frequents trader joe’s only to let her fresh produce rot while she chows down in-n-out.

nancy has taken a lot of random college/online courses at her parents’ urging over the years -- accounting, sociology, interpretive dance -- but nothing that adds up to a full degree

lowkey desperate to prove her independence, but could probs use a roommate at some point?? nancy’s not used to living solely on tips skmdjsnm

really tempted to call her dad like, “money me. money now.”

instead!! she’s started selling all the stuff that she stole from her mom. hit up her depop if you wanna dress like a middle-aged woman from manhattan xx

very much into high fantasy & horror

extremely social, which is a big part of why nancy loves partying, but she’s struggled to find an easier, chill middle ground since moving.

does not know how to keep her opinions to herself. brain to mouth filter has long since dissolved

is always smoking. even if she’s not LITERALLY holding a cigarette, rest assured, she’s mentally taking a drag

aaannnd, that’s all folks!! idk how much of this is actually coherent so please do bug me if you have questions or just wanna riff about charas. since nancy’s so fresh to silver lake, she could use every connection under the sun & tbh i really love randomly throwing muses into the thick of it without much context too, so i have no qualms about goin’ in blind.

[mikrowrites]

Beautiful People

Armitage Hux x Reader, Kylo Ren x Reader

Hi! I'd like to request a Hux x Reader in a modern AU where the reader is dating Kylo Ren because of status and for public appearances. And in comes Hux and the reader has feelings for him and he feels the same way but they have to keep it secret otherwise it's a scandal that'll ruin everyone. Also Kylo knows but doesn't want to let the reader go because he's an asshole. Thank youuuuuuu

A/N: I’m so excited about this story, it’s so unlike anything I’ve ever written! I hope you all enjoy! xx

Warnings: angst, toxic relationships, adult situations, sexual references, language, those who love Kylo should not read this it hurt to write him like this oof

Y/N carefully picked up a diamond earring, rubbing it between her index and middle fingers. After a beat she lifted it up, looking into her vanity mirror as she placed on her ear, the other following suit, letting her arms fall to her sides.

She studied her own face in the mirror, to her elegantly styled hair to her perfectly done makeup. Y/N pursed her ruby red lips, her gaze hardening.

She hated the person in the mirror.

Y/N L/N was born into a prominent family, the only child of two political powerhouses. Her childhood had been that of a princess’s, perhaps even of an heir. Fitting, due to Y/N’s inevitable future of continuing her parent’s legacies.

So here she sat, wearing diamond jewelry in a $10k dollar dress, in a penthouse flat. Y/N let her eyes flicker away from her reflection to the opening of the door behind her. She turned, inhaling softly.

“You look beautiful.” Kylo Ren murmured, stepping into the large room. He wore an expensive black tuxedo, his raven hair slicked back and his shoes definitely red bottoms.

“You don’t mean that.” Y/N curtly replied, still planted onto her vanity stool.

Kylo clicked his tongue. “You are.”

Y/N scoffed, standing and walking to her closet, opening the door and stepping inside the walk-in, searching for a clutch. “What would you like me to say? You look dashing and handsome?

“Thank you, I tried.” Kylo responded, infuriating her further.

Y/N finally found the clutch she was looking for walking out and briskly passing Kylo. She paused at the door, turning with a tight smile.

“If you bring home your slut tonight, please be quieter this time.”

The circumstances of Kylo and Y/N meeting were very much prepared. Kylo himself arose from European royalty, but instead chose to leave for America, becoming a citizen and changing his name as a teen and anticipating the world of politics. His distant uncle Sentor Snoke took him under his wing, bringing him up into the desired plane. Y/N’s father found an arrangement of Y/N and Kylo beneficial on many fronts, as much of a 21st Century arranged romance as you could get.

They had know each other for years, since their early twenties when they met during both of their studies at Harvard. Kylo and Y/N were actually friends once, unloading griefs upon each other, Y/N about her stifling parents and Kylo on his past dreams. He once wanted to be an Air Force pilot, once wanted to be an artist.

But as they were arranged, they grew cold, and as Y/N dreaded this appearance-cast relationship, she suspected Kylo did as well, though he tried, sometimes.

The car ride to the benefit was incurabley long with traffic, a thick silence hanging between Kylo and Y/N. The city noises were only apparent, Y/N casting her gaze out the shaded windows.

“Are you going to be like this all night?” Kylo finally spoke up.

“Don’t worry your pretty little head,” Y/N mumbled, still gazing at the city lights, “I’ll be a good little girl for us tonight.”

Kylo sighed. “We should announce an engagement soon. Call a tabloid or two and tip them off. Would be good press.”

Y/N turned to look at him with full eyes, casting her gaze down. “Trapped with each other forever.”

“You make it sound like prison.” Kylo growled, “We can come and go as we please. Put on a show for the idiots.”

Y/N finally met his eyes, biting her cheek. “Give me a few weeks, if you could be oh-so-kind.”

Kylo rolled his eyes as the car pulled up to the venue, the sounds of cameras flashing and paparazzi flooding the night. Y/N exhaled loudly, staring ahead. “Let’s give them a show.”

Armitage Hux was not an obscenely wealthy man. His father was big money, and Hux, he delved into politics to appease his father, climbing the ranks.

The benefit gala was a horrid idea in his opinion, too much frill and preening of celebrity-level politicians, who reeked of corruption and pretentiousness. But Hux went along with it, agreeing to help sponsor and put in an appearance.

Hux dreaded that his life would be married to politics, maybe a wife who was as money sick as everyone else, maybe one day he’d become as ugly as them all and become unbothered by the people he encountered.

He made his way past paparazzi, into the venue where he breathed a bit, walking up to a man in a crisp and ornate Air Force uniform. “I don’t like this idea.”

“Oh come on,” Commander Poe Dameron chuckled, clapping Hux’s back. “A little party never killed nobody.”

“Never say never.” Hux groaned, the Guatemalan-American raising an eyebrow.

“Look, I hate this arrangement too. But Princess Organa needs information, sometimes you have to play dirty.” He smirked.

Hux despised working with the royalty. In fact, he wanted nothing to do with them. But when the offer to bring down Kylo Ren showed itself, Hux couldn’t refuse. He hated that man, his arrogance and disgusting holier than thou complex. So he became a “spy”, if you will.

“So long as the dirt stays off my hands.” Hux spat, walking away from Poe.

Y/N walked down the carpet with Kylo, smiling at the paparazzi as they shouted praises and controversies. She hated this part the most, but Y/N had a remarkable and unreavealing smile.

Inside the venue Y/N and Kylo relaxed a bit, but they still knew the motions of the parts they had to play. Kylo, a ruthless politician and Y/N, a loving girlfriend.

Y/N was standing next to Kylo as he introduced himself and was speaking with someone prominent as she found herself scanning over the room. Her eyes gazed over every person until they suddenly stopped, zeroing in on someone.

Hux stood with a flute of champagne, forcing smiles at pretentious billionaires until he felt a stare embedding into him. He turned, his eyes meeting that of a beautiful girl’s. Not just any beautiful girl, Kylo Ren’s girlfriend.

Hux nodded, Y/N smiling back. He read her expression, it was clear she’d rather be anywhere else. But what could Hux do about that? His heart did not race, his cheeks reddening, a cold sweat breaking out, absolutely not... right?

How could one pretty girl reduce Hux to this? A taken girl, by his enemy! He turned away from the girl, but still felt her gaze on him unwavering. She always held that affect upon him.

Y/N’s smile widened a bit as the red-head turned, still observing him intently. Kylo leaned near her ear, speaking in a deep voice. “Remember what you promised? Be a good girl.”

“Yes, your highness.” Y/N hissed through an unsuspecting smile, feeling Kylo tense at the hated nickname.

He grasped her wrist tight, Y/N gasping in surprise as Kylo pulled her close to him, his breath warm on her face. “Never fucking call me that again.” He then kissed her softly on the cheek, turning away to greet another wealthy businessman.

Y/N smiled sweetly, muttering about using the bathroom as she walked away, rubbing her wrist as she weaves through the crowd.

Hux pulled her aside once in the hallway, Y/N quickly pushing him against the wall. She grasped the man’s suit, ravenously pressing her lips against his. The man, grasped her shoulders, pulling her back. “Missed me that much, sweetheart?”

Y/N smirked. “I like a handsome man in a suit.”

“Obviously.” Hux smiled tightly, tucking a loose piece of hair behind her ear. “You look ravishing.”

“Armitage Hux, such a charmer.” Y/N chuckled. “We should just walk out there arm and arm, give the cameras something to squawk about.”

Hux’s smile dropped slowly, resting his forehead on Y/N’s, sighing. “We can’t.” he whispered.

“No, you’re right.” She mumbled, closing her eyes. “Just... hold me a bit longer.”

Hux wrapped his arms around her, his hand clutching the back of Y/N’s head.

“I’ll hold you as long as you wish, my dear.”

Y/N and Hux had met years and years prior, before she had even met Kylo. She was seventeen, visiting Dublin with her family when she encountered him. Hux was graduated from highschool, enjoying a gap year of foreign policy and preparation to embark to America.

They immediately clicked, becoming good friends and having weekly lunches at a local New York Dinner. They were close for a few years, until the letter from Harvard came and she flew away. Where she met Kylo and the whole mess began.

Whatever was happening between Y/N and Hux, call it an affair or call it a relationship, had been continual over five years.

Y/N suspected Kylo knew, but with unknown women weekly in their spare bedroom, she felt as though it never really mattered.

Hours later Y/N was climbing into the black SUV again, Kylo sitting across from her. The city lights blurred outside the window, a light drizzle of rainfall fogging the windows.

The two were silent. Y/N rested her chin in her hand, staring out the window, as Kylo stared comprehensively at the woman before him.

“You saw him.”

Y/N turned to him, raising an eyebrow.

Kylo scoffed, sitting back. “Didn’t you?”

She leaned forwards as the car pulled up to the apartments, the girl narrowing her eyebrows.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Y/N stepped out of the SUV, Kylo following as she stepped into the private elevator, pressing their floor number and swiping her keycard.

Kylo suddenly grabbed both sides of her face, kissing her deeply. Y/N raggedly gasped in shock, stumbling back as he pushed her up against the wall. She squirmed under his grip, finally breaking away and elbowing his chest, Y/N retreating back. Kylo licked his lips, chuckling as he turned to look at the elevator door as it chimed open.

He turned to look at her. “You’re mine. It’d be better for you not to forget that.”

Y/N’s lips parted, watching as Kylo walked out of the elevator and into their flat. He slammed their bedroom door behind him, the girl finally wandering into the penthouse. She unclasped her shoes, removing them and tossing them on the floor. Her dress hugged her body, but to Y/N it felt like it was suffocating her.

She sat on their plush couch, running her fingers across the fabric as her breath began to catch in her throat, Y/N gasping for air as tears began to trail down her cheeks. A broken sob escaped her lips as she began to rip pins out of her hair, her Y/H/C locks spilling out.

She knew Kylo could hear her despair. Could hear Y/N cry and sob and fall apart. But he never emerged to comfort her.

Y/N woke the next morning on the couch, still wearing the dress she used to love so much. She sat up, rubbing her head and catching her reflection in a wall-hanging mirror. Mascara tracked down her face, her hair a mess. After changing into a different shirt and shorts from the outside closet and cleaning her face Y/N sighed, standing and walking to the kitchen.

She carefully pulled a glass from the cabinet, turning on the faucet to fill it with water.

“Oh!”

Y/N whipped her head around. A young girl stood in the living room, her dark hair loose around her shoulders and a dress shirt, Kylo’s red dress shirt from the night before, covering her body.

“Hello.” Y/N softly replied, turning to switch off the faucet, taking a sip of water as she turned. “Would you like a glass of water? Something stronger?”

The girl’s mouth opened and closed, her features contorting into confusion. After a couple tense seconds she spoke. “Why... what’s...”

Y/N leaned across the counter, smiling softly at the girl. “What’s your name?”

She hesitated for a moment. “Rey.”

“Rey,” Y/N sat her glass down, interlacing her fingers. “I’m not stupid. I know you’ve been fucking Kylo for a while now. And honestly, I could care less. But here’s the thing,” She pushed away from the counter, approaching Rey. “you’re in dangerous water, Rey. This tiny world, this life. It’s not glamorous. And the last thing I want is for him to hurt you.”

Rey exhaled deeply, leaning against the back of the couch. “I’m... I’m sorry.” She pushed some hair behind her ear. “Kylo... he’s always been so kind to me. He told me, that you and him—“

“We’re simply a game.” Y/N smiled. “A game we can afford to loose.”

Rey left soon after, Y/N sitting in the living room going over several pieces of finance paperwork for her father’s firm. Kylo finally emerged from the bedroom, Y/N not skipping a beat as her eyes remained glued to the paper. “Rey is a sweet girl.”

Kylo’s face hardened. “Hux is an... interesting man.”

Y/N looked up, the papers falling down onto her lap. “Kylo, what are we doing? We both love different people, maybe we should just call it—“

“No.” Kylo frowned. “Terminating this relationship for other people would ruin us. All of us.”

“What’s the point anymore?” Y/N countered. “You’re powerful, I’m just a mantelpiece, and Rey would make a great—“

“You aren’t listening!” Kylo shouted, interrupting her. “I sacrificed everything to be here. I refuse to do that again.”

Y/N stood, the papers tumbling and fluttering out of her lap and onto the hardwood floor. “Why can’t you just let me go? We never loved each other, Snoke manipulated you into this relationship, into this role!”

“You always blame everything on Snoke, too scared to admit your faults.” Kylo spat.

“My faults?” Y/N yelled. “Mine? You are so fucking toxic, Kylo! You’re a fucking hazardous chemical!”

The slap echoed throughout the room, Y/N stumbling back and clutching the arm of a chair, reached her hand up to her cheek. She shakily looked up at Kylo, her eyes reflecting fear. She always thought of Kylo being all bark, no bite.

Y/N never thought he’d hurt her like this.

“Fuck. You.” She seethed, standing and shoving past Kylo, grabbing her coat and keys as she walked into the elevator, glaring at Kylo as the doors closed.

An hour later Hux answered a knock at his door, only to meet Y/N with sunglasses adorned on her face, her hood up. “Hey Armi.”

“Hey Y/N/N.” Hux responded, gesturing for her to come in. “To what do I owe the pleasure.”

“I want to leave. Somewhere far away from here, from politics and Kylo and the people. I want to disappear, and I want you to come with me.” Y/N insisted in a level voice. She removed her sunglasses and hood, Hux’s eyes widening at her bruised face.

He raised his hand up, carefully running his thumb over the bruise on her cheek before rushing to his freezer, returning and handing Y/N a frozen vegetable bag. “He... did he do this to you?”

“I can’t live like this anymore, Armitage.” Y/N pleaded, the girl pressing the bag against her cheek. “Remember when we went on that holiday to Greece?”

Hux’s face softened. “The one where you publicly fed birds whole gyros?”

Y/N smiled. “Yeah. That one. Let’s go back, let’s go and forget all of this. Please.”

Hux sat on his couch, Y/N settling down next to him. “It’d ruin us. Destroy our reputations, hurt any of our chances.”

“We’d be crazy to reveal such a scandal.” Y/N mused.

Hux reached over to pick up his laptop, flipping it open.

“When do you want to leave?”

[saltys-writings]

Oneus Reaction to you hiding your feelings from them

-----

Ravn:

All you remember is absolutely not liking Youngjo for as long as you can think back. You’re not even sure what exactly made you hate him so much, but it doesn’t matter anymore now, because from one day to the other you suddenly found yourself having serious feelings for him. Suddenly you didn’t only look at him with spite or hate in your eyes, but with curiosity, and somehow you even liked what you saw, liked what he sounded like when he talked, even though you couldn’t stand listening to him before that. And it all confuses you so much, but most of all you hate your own feelings of attraction for him.

And he knows. The moment something changed inside of your heart, he noticed, and it didn’t take him long to figure out that you - as paradoxical as it may have seemed - developed a huge crush on him. So he started testing you, tried being around you more, initiating a conversation, or making eye contact from afar, and each and every time you rejected him with a blush on your whole face and body language that made it very clear you’re not just warding him off, but that you’re fighting an internal battle with your feelings for him.

Until that one day when he’s finally done with you being an exhausting bundle to deal with for both you and him. He makes sure to talk to you somewhere people don’t usually come to often so he could be alone with you, and when you scoff back as per usual, something inside him snaps and he just kisses you. You’re caught by surprise and are at a loss for words, so he speaks up first.

“I love you too,” is the only thing he says. And instead of answering, you go with your urge to feel his lips on yours again and to relay all your emotions on to him, so you reach out for him and continue kissing for who knows how long.

-----

Leedo:

You’re used to falling head over heels for people who seem far out of your league, but Gunhak, one of the most popular guys at your college, was a new achievement, even for you. So this time especially you made sure to hide your feelings well and avoid talking to him. After all, you didn’t want the countless other girls who were after him to hate you, and he wouldn’t like someone like you anyway. So for a good half of a year you’re content with just watching him from afar, and secretly enjoying the sound of his voice whenever he had to read aloud in class.

But then the day came when a mutual friend of the two of you threw a party and invited both of you. You don’t know if she messed with the results but when you’re playing 7 minutes in heaven late at night, you and Gunhak get chosen as one of the pairs to enter the closet together. The first two or three minutes, nobody really says anything, aside from the occasional super-awkward comment, or him nervously clearing his throat five times in a row. But then he finally speaks.

“This silence is killing me. I think I should just use this time and say what I really want to say. I know you barely know me, and I don’t really know much about you either, but I like you…” You stare at him blankly for a while, trying but failing to process what he just told you. So you ask him to repeat himself with wide eyes. He sighs. “I like you.” - “But what about all the other girls?” - “What other girls?” - “The other, prettier, smarter, more popular girls!” - “I don’t see them next to you.” You consider hitting him for the cheesy comment, but he makes it clear that he means what he said, and he carefully wraps his arms around you, pulling you into a warm hug. Whatever consequences this night might have, and whatever might happen from now on - in that moment you don’t think about all those things. All you can think about is him, and how lucky you are to be so close to him right now, even though you never thought you would be.

-----

Seoho:

When you see Seoho for the very first time, you have a strange feeling in your gut. One that tells you you definitely don’t want to fall for someone like him. But also one that tells you it’s probably inevitable… 

The years pass and you two become good friends, until that one day everything changes. You’re not even sure what caused it, but you suddenly see him with different eyes. Maybe it’s because you realized he turned from a boy to a man, or maybe it’s because you found a new side to him. One thing’s for sure though: just thinking about him makes your heart race and fills you with a new kind of warm and fuzzy feeling.

And you hate it. He’s supposed to be your friend, not your crush, and definitely not your lover. So you see no other way but to avoid him, keep all conversations with him as short and emotionless as possible and to try getting rid of your feelings as fast as possible. But how does one get rid of such strong feelings of something a little more than a crush…? Seoho notices how you’re removing yourself from his life little by little, and it makes him very visibly sad, but he also doesn’t understand. Did he do something to upset you? So he sees no other way but to talk to you about it, and even though you’re quite good at running and hiding away from him, eventually he catches up with you and asks you why you’re avoiding him. You want to lie to him, but seeing his devastated expression you decide you can’t hurt him anymore, so you just kind of say the truth and confess to him.

“It’s because you’re in love with me…?” Seoho repeats what you tell him and smiles. “Well… maybe we can try going out then?”

-----

Keonhee:

He’d notice your (very obvious) crush on him immediately, but as soon as you tell him he’s just a friend to you and you have no romantic feelings for him whatsoever he’ll be so confused. Like why would you say that to him when you obviously like him?? Or is he wrong here??? But the way you treat him and the way you talk to him make it seem like you have the biggest crush on him ever? 

It would cause him several headaches to figure out how you feel about him, and secretly you’d become worried about him because he seems really distracted and caught up in his thoughts lately because of it. So you attempt to take care of him and you try to show that he’s important to you a little more (but not too much ofc). But somehow it’s like you both avoid speaking honestly around each other. Until finally you ask him directly what happened and he blurts out the whole truth, that he’s confused because of you and he doesn’t know if you reciprocate his feelings and-

“Did you just say you have feelings for me?” you ask and he stares at you with big eyes. Everything’s silent for a second, before you find sudden determination in his expression and he’ll take your hands and tell you that he loves you. To that you just stutter like the flustered mess you are in that moment. Keonhee interprets that as you liking him back, and finally you admit your feelings and he embraces you tightly. However, you can be sure he will complain several times after about you not having been honest from the start.

-----

Hwanwoong:

This little shit will be so sure that you’ll fall for him from the first time your eyes met. And I mean… he wasn’t exactly wrong, but it seriously hurts your pride that he was right and so cocky about it. Like this one time he literally interlocked arms with you, went up to his friends and was like “so this is my future girlfriend/boyfriend, say hi!” And ever since then you just about had it with him. After that you told him at least five times a day that you hate him, despise him, and that he should just leave you alone. At first he takes it all with a grin and throws his arm around your shoulders, watching you blush madly. But at some point the insults start to get to him, even though he doesn’t want to admit it, and you feel like he’s trying to distance himself from you.

And then comes the day when you neither talk to him nor see him anywhere, and you realize that now’s the time to be honest with yourself and with him, or you might lose him forever. So you ask him to meet you after both your schedules for the day are over. You don’t meet anywhere specific, just next to a street you both often come to, and without words you fall into each other’s arms, apologizing and both confessing to the other, tears in both your eyes. You make sure to forgive each other, call each other stupid, and then share a kiss neither of your wants to break, pouring in all the emotions you’ve been holding in for so long.

-----

Xion:

Having known him since you were kids, you always had a bit of a crush on him. But, as per usual between childhood friends, suddenly starting to date would be very weird. So as you grew older and your feelings for him wouldn’t fade in the slightest, but only mature, you tried to accept them and hide them away in the corners of your heart. You spent your school days as normal friends, until right before graduation when one of your friends pointed out what a cute couple you would make and that you should definitely go to your graduation ceremony and party as a pair. You and Dongju just exchanged awkward glances, but through some turn of events you end up actually being ditched by all your friends and being left over as just the two of you on the day of the party. 

“And now? We can’t really pretend to be dating for an evening, can we?” he remarks without looking you in the eyes, but you see the faint blush on his cheeks. You feel your own feelings resurfacing and your hopes rising, but you try to push it all back where you kept it locked away for all those years. He wouldn’t suddenly like you back, would he? And dating your childhood friend isn’t so easy either… Despite those thoughts, somehow the only words that come out of your mouth are, “Who would stop us?”

So you walk hand in hand to where all the other couples are dancing and somehow you two enjoy yourselves in a completely new way, but with the familiarity you’re used to whenever you’re together. And when you share a kiss at midnight on the rooftop where everyone gathers to watch the fireworks, you think to yourself that maybe dating your childhood friend doesn’t seem so bad after all...

[riverrivrain]

“Shut your mouth and run me like a river”

CHARACTER NAME River Rain Bathgate

GENDER AND PRONOUNS Cis-female, she 

AGE & DATE OF BIRTH 27, 17th of January 1993

OCCUPATION Waitress at Dutch’s 

PLACE OF BIRTH Pleasance

HOW LONG HAVE THEY BEEN IN PLEASANCE? Native, probably staying forever and always 

Shut your mouth, baby, stand and deliver Holy hands, will they make me a sinner?

Underneath the read more you can find an introduction to my little broken angel River, I’m M, so incredibly happy to be here and cannot wait to get to write with you all and plot.  Trigger Warning: tw rape, tw alcohol, tw memory loss, tw drugs 

@phqextras

Milestones 

17th of January 1993 - “It was the day of my birth, you know...!” Oh for how long she’d loved telling that story, as a child and later on a teenager growing up nothing seemed more exciting, or attention grabbing than getting to tell the story of the day she was born and the phrase that suddenly appeared all over town the following months, a phrase that - no pun intended - had the whole town holding its breath. Back then, when it was just bonfires with booze in thermo mugs to conceal the contents that were supposed to make them feel more grown up, the story was nothing but a tale she’d tell to impress or tease, depending on the audience, but now? After everything that happened? It was hard to tell the story, although she still did it, with the same excitement instead it now felt like some kind of dark, foreboding message that should have warned her from the very first day...quite literally. March 2000 - What would a girl like River be without some daddy issues, huh? Her father left her mom when River was 7, leaving her father to be the parent she still idolises due to only limited but brilliant memories of him, whereas her mother had always been blamed by her that the family fell apart. Something that wasn't exactly made their relationship when River grew older and both women, unbeknown to each other, had quite a similar character - especially when it came to men and the attention they craved from them. “My dad, when he was still around, he’d take me to Riff Raff’s sometimes..!” One of the only warm memories of her father (or just generally one of the only) and a prime example why, on those days when the world seems to be caving in, she still goes back there. It’s on the rare days that she leaves her house in an oversized sweatshirt without any make-up on, those days when pretending and impressing was not part of the menu. On those days one can find River in the back of the store, fingers gliding over all the records she used to look at with her dad, remembering the stories he’d tell her about the bands or specific songs. She doesn’t actually own a record player, has never bought a vinyl and yet, on the gloomiest of days it’s between the records and the many stories they hold that she seeks solitude.

2008 - 2011 - High school could have been the perfect experience and it really wasnt far from it. River was popular. Luscious brown hair, pouty, full lips, Bambi-like eyes and a personality to match it wasnt hard to see why the boys liked her and yet, she despite some mild rivalry, she wasnt the kind of girl the boys loved and the girls despised, quite the opposite, she was well included in the social scene of her school, never missing a party - both the official ones and those hidden away with booze in brown paper bags. But back then, drinking wasnt a sport and drugs were only recreational, something to do when you were bored, or perhaps wanted to seem cooler and more daring than you were - but it certainly had not had the same quality that it has today.  Graduation Night at Northwood High, 2011 -  Two boys drive a girl home, she’s drunk and passed out in the back seat. Rumours spread about what they did to her, or what she let them do to her and yet, the girl in the center of the story is the only one who remembers nothing. Memories and rumours easily shaped into one, making the truth the one thing that is impossible to filter out through all the noise. With a story that starts before your own memory, it is hard to trust your own mind and River, who perhaps once, before men started looking at her like prey, or even worse, others had looked at her as if they wanted to safe her, make her whole again, perhaps before that there would have been a chance that she’d left town. But much like the memories of that night, Rivers memories of any plans of dreams and wishes previously had and made had vanished, instead giving into one bad decision after the next in a desperate attempt to both, forget further and finally remember. Only added to the mystery (and the knot in Rivers stomach) is the way she woke up, not just without any memories, a dirtied and ripped up dress and no shoes - but where: 708 Bell Street, not in the house but in front of the Locust Tree. “Call me crazy but I swear that tree...Jenny, she probably knows more about what’s going on in this town than any of us!” Somewhere deep down River has had enough years to convince herself that Jenny, if she was truly in that tree, possibly is the only one to hold the real memories of what happened to Riv all those years ago - but now, saying that out loud would make her sound crazy, right? 

2011 - today 

Oh how the years had blurred since that fateful night. One shouldn't imagine that it would have affected the girl that much, but the girl who has slowly grown into a woman has never quite been the same. Community college was attended more or less frequently, though if anyone would ask her teachers they’d underline the less - and even if she was there, she was dazed. Either high or just tired from some kind of escapades from the night before. Its not to say that the brunette isn't smart, she is, there had been the possibility of a future, a job, perhaps even a career - but once she stopped trusting herself and gave into the rumour and the image the gossip around town had painted of her, it was easier to spend nights in seedy bars with even more seedy characters than it was to follow dreams that were long forgotten. None the less, sometimes the question what happened to the brunette with the bright, wide open eyes and the dream of an art history degree came back to her, only to be quieted and caged back in her heart much like Charles Bukowski once wrote in his poem: 

“There's a bluebird in my heart That wants to get out but I'm too tough I say: "Stay in there I'm not going to let anybody see"There's a bluebird in my heart That wants to get out but I pour whiskey I take a cigarette so the whores The bartenders, the grocery clerks Never know that he is in thereThere's a bluebird in my heart That wants to get out but I'm too tough I say: "Stay down Do you wanna mess me up? Do you wanna screw up all of my works?"There's a bluebird in my heart That wants to get out but I'm too clever I only let him out at night sometimes When everybody sleepsI say: "I know that you're there Don't be so sad, " that's what I said Then I put him back but he's always singing I don't let him die and we sleep together Like that with our secret pactIt's nice enough to make a little man weep But I don't weep, do you? It's nice enough to make a little man weep But I don't weep, do you?There is a bluebird messing with my heart What should I do with this little bird? There is a bluebird messing with my heart What could I do with this little bird? I'm turning into a bird, I'm turning into a bird So I will fly with this melancholy”

[onhirel]

Can’t Help Falling In Love

To say that Amanda was surprised when Diana suddenly appeared in front of her while she was eating breakfast in the dining hall would probably be the understatement of the century. They existed in some of the same social circles and both attended some of the more hoity-toity events that the various ultra-wealthy families that their own families were affiliated with held (and that Amanda despised, by the way) and of course whenever Amanda threw a big party on or near the campus, Diana usually showed up. But it wasn’t like Amanda sought her out in person for those. Diana heard about an Amanda party, Diana went to an Amanda party...but then, so did most of the campus. Their face-to-face interactions beyond passing greetings were few and far between. And so, Diana appearing at her breakfast table, blushing slightly and not meeting her eyes, well...it was kinda a big thing.

“Uh, can I help you?” Amanda asked with a quirked eyebrow. Her words weren’t mean, of course...if anything, her tone betrayed her confusion.

“I...need your help,” Diana said, hesitantly, and Amanda’s eyebrow rose to meet the one already raised. Diana, asking her for help? Now, that was singularly unheard of. They were in different academic programs, so it couldn’t be coursework related...though, on second thought, even if they shared every single last class together, Diana still wouldn’t be asking for her help. The British transfer student’s academic exploits were legendary, with some even saying that she could teach the classes that she was enrolled in. Amanda’s grades...were not that good. Not bad, of course, she was definitely on track to graduate, but yeah, Diana wouldn’t be coming to her for help with schoolwork.

So...the party scene? That didn’t quite seem right either. Diana was always reserved and almost aloof while at any social gathering, seeming to draw dignity and poise about her like armor so that she was the talk of the party, not necessarily an active part of it. Amanda would also wager that Diana’s presence at her parties was the result of Diana feeling that she had to go, not because she wanted to go. So she didn’t think it was something party related. Which really only left one thing. Smirking as she leaned back in her chair, Amanda almost triumphantly crossed her arms over her chest. “So, finally deciding to act?” she asked as she nodded at the empty chair opposite to her.

Frowning in confusion, Diana nonetheless sat down. “Pardon?” she asked.

“Oh, come on. You’re coming to me for help. The only thing that you would come to me for help with is our mutual friend, Akko. I’ve noticed the goo-goo eyes you’ve been sending her. You’ve finally gotten off your high horse and decided to do something about it.”

Diana’s lips tightened slightly. “Very astute for a student with a 2.11 GPA.”

Ignoring the dig (because that’s not a fight she wanted to have this early in the morning...especially not with a 4.0 student) Amanda pressed on. “But then begs the question...what changed?” she asked, and given Diana’s stony stare, she wasn’t going to share. But then, Amanda realized with a blink, she didn’t have to. “You heard the song she sang last night, didn’t you?”

Diana sucked in a deep breath as she looked away. “And your conversation with her afterwards,” she admitted in a soft voice that was only just barely able to be heard over the bustle of the dining hall.

“Oh ho! Didn’t peg the high and mighty Diana Cavendish to be an eavesdropper!” Amanda crowed, and the look that Diana shot her was frankly unamused. “A’ight, so, if I help you out, what do I get?”

Diana pursed her lips. “Hannah England’s phone number.”

“Interesting, but a useless offer,” Amanda scoffed, waving a dismissive hand. “I already have it.”

“What?”

“I already have it. Diana, you’re talking to THE Amanda O’Neill. I have everyone’s phone number.”

“Fine, you have her phone number. But do you have the knowledge that she has the biggest crush on you?”

That shut Amanda up. She had always kind of hoped, but couldn’t be too certain if the auburn-haired girl was interested in her. Having a definitive answer one way or the other. “Okay. You have my interest. If I help you, will you help me?”

“Of course. You scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours.”

Amanda nodded, mind already racing. “Alright, Akko is stupid romantic, as in she’s romantic but can be absolutely block headed when it comes to these things. So, whatever you do should be grand in scale and leave no doubt that you...” she drew off, eyes widening. “Hey, do you play piano?”

xxxXXXxxx

Akko was bored out of her mind as she sat slouched in her chair, waiting for class to begin. And it sucked, because she knew just how important adolescent psychology was for teachers, especially for teachers going into fields where the children were expected to be competitive with each other, like gym class. Being able to look out for signs of bullying and possible abuse as well as seeing where students with disabilities (even high functioning ones) could fit in and participate was so so so important!

...but oh my god was the class so boring! It was so frustrating to have such an important class be taught by so dull a professor. It took so much effort just to stay awake, and she just knew that she’d be lucky to walk away with a C in this class!

So engrossed in her own issues was she, that Akko didn’t notice Avery, one of her friends-through-Amanda, receive a text message and perk up in her chair several rows below Akko’s. She also didn’t notice Avery turn towards her, or notice how Avery lifted her phone towards her.

She did notice, however, the message that she received. She glanced at her phone, and noticed it was a video message from Amanda. Huh. That was somewhat unexpected. Another glance at the clock on the wall (because the professor apparently scheduled EVERYTHING based on that clock, which was often incorrect) revealed that she still had a good ten minutes before class started. Being late just the one time had convinced her well enough that being fifteen minutes early was the safe choice...who knew the cranky old bat would get that pissed because Akko was three minutes late.

Figuring she still had some time to spare, Akko opened the message, and it loaded quickly enough, revealing...Diana sitting at a piano in the campus’s musical section. What? She was expecting whatever stupid and funny video had decided to share, not...not this.

“You haven’t played this before, are you sure you’re okay?” a voice that Akko recognized as Amanda’s asked, revealing her to be the one holding the phone doing the recording, and Akko’s confusion grew. Just what was going on?

“I’ve been playing since I was seven and mastered Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata in its entirety when I was twelve, and have since moved on to much more difficult pieces,” Diana replied stiffly. “I’ll be fine.”

“Moonlight Sonata, that’s the really fast one, right?” Amanda asked.

Diana huffed, and then started playing, and her hands that were hidden from view by the piano must have been flying across the keys, given how quickly the notes poured from the instrument, and Akko recognized the Moonlight Sonata, played perfectly by her crush. Diana didn’t play for very long, allowing notes to fade into silence as she spoke. “Technically easy, but difficult to truly master.” Then she nervously licked her lips, and Akko’s heart fluttered in her chest. Diana, flustered? Perish the thought. “Now, can we get started? I don’t even know if we’re technically allowed in here,” she said with a faint blush, and Akko nearly swooned. How could the blonde be so beautiful and cute all at the same time?!

“Just waiting on you, princess.”

Diana rolled her eyes. “Countess, actually,” she sniffed before taking a deep breath before looking directly at the phone, and when she spoke again, her voice wavered slightly. “Akko, this song is for you. I heard your singing last night, and...and wanted to give you an answer.”

Akko blushed heavily at that, and hoped that no one was paying attention to how she was now imitating a tomato, but she wasn’t able to tear her eyes away from her phone even as her heart began to pound in her chest. Oh my god, Diana heard her?! She wanted to melt into her chair and disappear forever!

But then Diana began to play, and Akko’s embarrassment disappeared as she recognized the song. “No...” she whispered, almost in shock even as Diana started to sing, voice soft and crooning, heartfelt as she poured emotion into the lyrics, and Akko had never heard anything as beautiful as Diana’s British accented voice singing the words to a song that Akko never expected her to sing, especially not to her!

“Wise men say, Only fools rush in, But I can’t help, Falling in love with you.”

“Oh shall I stay, Would it be a sin? Oh, if I can’t help, Falling in love with you.”

“Like a river flows, Surely to the sea, Darling so it goes, Some things are meant to be.”

“Take my hand, Take my whole life too, Oh, for I can’t help, Falling in love with you.”

“Oh, like a river flows, Surely to the sea, Darling so it goes, Some things are meant to be.”

“Oh take my hand, Take my whole life too, For I can’t help, falling in love with you.”

“Oh for I, I can’t help, Falling in love with you.”

The notes faded into silence, and again Diana licked her lips, peering up through her eyelashes at the phone that Amanda was holding as she blushed prettily, obviously nervous. Tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, she cleared her throat. “Do you...do you think she’ll like it?” she asked tentatively.

“I don’t know,” Amanda asked as the camera turned around, revealing the red-head’s smirking face. “Akko, did you like that?” There was a blur of movement and a tapping noise, and the video ended.

Akko blinked, surprised to find that her fingers were pressed against her lips and that her mouth was stretched in a wide grin. Oh. Oh she had places to be that wasn’t here. She hurriedly stuffed her notebook and text book into her overfull backpack, only pausing to shoot Amanda a hasty text: ‘where is she?’ Message sent, she left the classroom, ignoring the looks of surprise on all but one face.

Avery, for her part, uploaded the video she had taken of Akko’s first reaction to the video to a message. ‘Here u go, Amanda. Her first look as requested. She just left, think ur gonna have some company REAL quick.’ That task complete, Avery resolved herself to take good notes so that she could share them with Akko, as she didn’t expect to see the Japanese girl for quite some time. Girl doesn’t know what good friends she has, she mused to herself as the professor walked into the classroom. Still, glad to see that those two are finally doing something about their feelings!

[samscns-blog]

      *    𝖎𝖋   ur  ready  to  two  step  into  some  absolute  BULLSHIT  tomfoolery  ,  ya  girl  𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧  is  ready  for  u  with  my  lil  firecrotch  son  ,  𝖘𝖆𝖒𝖘𝖔𝖓  .  strong  silent  type  ,  ABSOLUTE  buffoon  ,  barely  keeping  it  together  so  hopefully  by  the  time  we’re  done  w  him  he’s  still  in  something  resembling  one  piece  :’)  all  my  love  to  u  and  u  cute  asses  !  i’m  so  excited  to  get  this  all  poppin  !

⋆  ╰  another   year   at   hollingsworth   ,  another   year   of   the  big   six rivalry   .   i   hear   that  SAMSON  MAILOTO   is   ensuring  SIGMA  ALPHA  NU   gets   a   solid   pledge   class   and   stays   at   the   top   of   the   ranks   .  oh   ,   you’re   not   familiar   with  HIM  ?  SAM   is   the  KJ  APA   look   alike   from  THE  BRONX   ,   NEW  YORK   .   a  part   of   PC  ‘16   ,  he  is   majoring   in  KINESIOLOGY   and   has   plans   to  ENTER  THE  MMA  AND  ESCAPE  FROM  THE  PUBLIC  EYE   after   undergrad   .   it   makes   sense   they   pledged   their   house   ,   their  PHLEGMATIC   &  SOLICITOUS   attributes   make   them   perfect   matches   .   however   ,   their  TREPIDATIOUS   &  AUSTERE   attributes   keep   their   name   alive   on  greek   rank   .   if   you   don’t   catch   them   dancing   to  BLEACH   -   BROCKHAMPTON   at   a   fraternity   band   party   this   year   ,   you’ll   be   sure   to   catch   them   nursing   their   morning   hangover   at  THE  SNU  HOUSE   .  cheers   to   another   wild   semester  !

⋆ ╰   𝑺 𝑻 𝑨 𝑻 𝑰 𝑺 𝑻 𝑰 𝑪 𝑺  .

𝒇𝒖𝒍𝒍    𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒆 :     samson  ioaleki  mailoto

𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬     :    sam  ,  sammy  

𝒃𝒊𝒓𝒕𝒉𝒅𝒂𝒕𝒆    /    𝒂𝒈𝒆 :    february  4    ,    twenty

𝒛𝒐𝒅𝒊𝒂𝒄     :    aquarius

𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓    𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒕𝒚    /    𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒔     :     cismale  identifying    with    he  /  him  /  his  pronouns    

𝒐𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏     :     heteroflexible  and  pansexual  ;  he’s  never  actively  considered  himself  as  lgbtq+  but  has  also  never  given  it  much  thought  ddjdjdjdkjdk

𝒐𝒄𝒄𝒖𝒑𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏    :    kinesiology  major  at  hu  ,  aspiring  welterweight  mma  fighter  ,  us  olympic  representitive  for  men’s  boxing  in  the  2020  olympics

𝒉𝒐𝒈𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒔    𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒔𝒆    :    gryffindor

𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏    𝒊𝒏𝒔𝒑𝒊𝒓𝒆𝒅    𝒃𝒚     :     eliot  alder  from  mr  robot  ,  kylo  ren  from  the  new  star  wars  series  ,  detective  elliot  stabler  from  law  and  order  svu  ,  steve  rogers  from  the  mcu  

𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒕𝒔    :    -    trepidatious  ,  austere  ,  apprehensive  ,  hesitant  ,  antisocial  ,  hostile  ,  bellicose  .

+        phlegmatic  ,  solicitous  ,  benevolent  ,  rational  ,  stalwart  ,  loyal  ,  reliable  ,  optimistic  .

𝑃𝐼𝑁𝑇𝐸𝑅𝐸𝑆𝑇  located  here  !

⋆ ╰    𝑨 𝑵 𝑻 𝑬 𝑪 𝑬 𝑫 𝑬 𝑵 𝑻 .

bullet  points  for  the  win  bc  who  has  time  for  all  the  tomfoolery  i  could  spew  from  my  ass  !

sammy’s  mom  was  a  housekeeper  in  upper  manhattan  for  some  fancy  dancy  homes  who  needed  their  gold  toilet  seat  covers  sanitized  3x  a  day  ,  u  know  the  type 🙄

samson  grew  up  in  a  run  down  apartment  in  a  small  samoan  community  in  the  bronx  and  has  always  been  a  lil  antisocial  weirdo  since  those  warm  dark  eyes  came  into  the  light  .  he  rlly  minded  his  own  business  n  wasn’t  really  curious  about  literally  anything  besides  running  and  wrestling  w  his  cousins  .  his  mom  struggled  to  keep  him  fed  and  housed  and  dressed  and  worked  relentless  hours  but  never  left  sam  needing  anything  ,  a  literal  fucking  legend  of  a  woman  and  he’s  proud  to  carry  her  last  name  !

sammy  always  felt  the  weight  of  never  wanting  to  be  an  extra  burden  to  his  mother  and  learned  to  really  be  self-sufficient  ,  likely  explaining  his  satisfaction  with  being  so  alone  

he  vaguely  remembers  the  night  his  life  changed  in  middle  school  ,  the  hushed  strained  whisper  from  the  living  room  ,  he’s  your  god  damned  son  too  ,  think  about  him  for  once  in  your  fucking  life  .  it  hit  like  a  fucking  train  once  the  story  picked  up  ,  5  time  nfl  superbowl  champ  father  to  secret  love  child  .  think  arnold  schwarznegger’s  secret  son  level  scandal  !  suddenly  his  shithead  of  a  dead  is  trying  to  salvage  his  image  ,  fighting  for  split  custody  arrangements  ,  telling  the  press  how  much  in  child  support  he  payed  ,  anything  to  save  his  ass

this  is  the  first  time  samson  remembers  being  fueled  by  rage  in  his  life  ,  as  a  relatively  well-tempered  child  ,  the  injustice  of  having  this  near-stranger  try  to  be  a  “  DAD  ” to  him  while  shitting  all  over  his  mother’s  name  made  his  fucking  blood  boil  and  becomes  a  theme  for  his  future

he  spends  the  next  chapters  of  his  life  going  to  the  fancy  private  schools  in  new  york  his  dad  picks  for  him  and  tearing  his  tie  off  on  the  ratty  bus  ride  into  the  bronx  to  go  home  to  his  mom  .  he  hates  having  to  haul  ass  back  and  forth  ,  wishing  he  could  stay  with  the  only  family  he’s  actually  given  a  shit  about  ,  but  bears  it  for  the  sake  of  not  causing  his  mom  any  more  torment  .  his  father  is  as  awful  as  could  be  imagined  ,  and  samson  hates  every  second  of  existing  with  him  ,  the  snarky  little  comments  at  school  and  in  the  ritzy  wealthy  circles  that  make  him  feel  more  of  a  black  sheep  than  he  ever  asked  to  be

this  becomes  the  root  of  his  anxiety  ,  bearing  the  weight  of  the  world’s  expectations  on  his  young  shoulders  and  repressing  his  own  needs  and  desires  as  a  result  .  he  goes  into  every  sport  imaginable  ,  his  father’s  DNA  being  increasingly  difficult  to  deny  ,  but  finds  a  particular  talent  with  fighting  and  takes  on  as  many  fighting  styles  as  he’s  able  to  master

turning  18  should  mean  freedom  for  sam  ,  but  nothing  is  ever  as  simple  as  he  could  ask  in  his  life  .  in  order  to  keep  the  child  support  payments  that  admittedly  help  keep  his  mother  afloat  ,  his  father  asks  one  more  thing  of  samson  :  hold  off  on  his  pro  mma  dreams  for  just  a  little  longer  in  order  to  attend  his  alma  matter  ,  hollingsworth  university  ,  as  a  publicity  move  and  then  he’ll  be  out  of  sam’s  life  in  every  way  except  financially  .  with  the  dream  of  completing  college  like  his  mom  always  aspired  for  him  ,  sam  agreed  and  went  on  to  appease  the  man  one  last  time  ,  joining  his  former  fraternity  to  sweeten  the  deal  (  and  secure  a  lovely  brownstone  in  his  childhood  neighborhood  signed  in  his  mother’s  name  )  and  is  a  year  out  from  graduating  and  letting  mma  be  the  only  reason  his  name  would  ever  appear  in  the  tabloids  .

⋆ ╰    𝑨 𝑵 𝑨 𝑳 𝒀 𝑺 𝑰 𝑺 .

personality  wise  ,  i  describe  sam  as  the  stupid  bitch  w  big  npc  energy  ,  if  u  want  him  to  talk  u  gotta  talk  to  him  first  and  even  then  he  might  just  give  u  that  hostile  stare  and  just  .. . .  remain  silent  KSDFSDF

he’s  about  as  NOT  a  people  person  as  physically  possible  ,  would  really  be  content  just  sticking  to  his  inner  circle  for  like  the  rest  of  his  life  without  concern  .  he  seems  like  this  rude  stand-offish  dick  but  the  truth  is  he’s  PAINFULLY  SHY  and  has  a  p  severe  case  of  generalized  anxiety  disorder  so  interactions  ?  w  new  ppl  ?  are  a  HARD  pass

did  i  mention  he’s  on  steriods  bc  that  def  adds  to  his  anxiety  and  hostility  !  lmao  !  he  started  juicing  in  high  school  when  his  dad  kept  pressuring  him  for  football  and  how  he  was  “  twice  your  size ”   at  that  age  ,  n  he  HATES  the  dude  but  he’s  also  lowkey  insecure  abt  his  lack  of  a  father  figure  so  ?  used  daddy’s  money  to  start  his  first  cycle  and  pay  off  to  test  clean  and  now  he’s  been  hooked  on  and  off  .  he’s  currently  starting  a  new  cycle  to  bulk  up  for  the  new  season  and  prep  for  the  2020  olympics  but  swears  he  wont  be  on  them  forever  :/

they  make  him  SUPER  aggressive  when  set  off  ,  it’s  a  decent  thing  that  sam’s  so  monotone  and  shy  that  he’s  also  pretty  laid  back  and  kinda  hard  to  rile  up  .  he  really  doesn’t  take  much  personally  and  won’t  do  a  huge  “  chest  pumped  bro  lets  do  this ”  show  bc  he  ?  thinks  all  those  guys  who  do  that  are  tools  LMAO  but  find  the  right  button  to  push  n  he’ll  become  the  very  thing  he  despises  !

if  u  can  get  past  the  literal  awkward  silence  and  resting  bitch  face  ,  sammy  is  actually  really  well  known  for  being  just  a  generally  decent  guy  .  the  perception  is  often  that  he’s  a  dick  bc  he  think’s  he’s  better  than  a  lot  of  ppl  ,  but  the  truth  is  he’s  just  too  nervous  to  start  conversations  n  most  ppl  assume  its  an  ego  thing  vs  a  “  i’m  about  to  piss  myself  thinking  abt  all  the  ways  this  convo  can  go  wrong  so  i’ll  just  not  talk  and  glare  @  u  instead  ”  thing

if  he  had  his  shit  together  he  would  definitely  qualify  as  a  dad  type  ,  but  since  he  doesn’t  ,  he  won’t  SSHSHSHSH  but  he’s  really  just  a  softie  deep  down  ,  he  has  a  stupid  as  HELL  sense  of  humor  and  is  really  objective  and  level  headed  .  the  gryffindor  in  him  is  DEEPLY  loyal  ,  like  to  the  death  ,  but  he’s  got  lots  of  hufflepuff  in  the  sense  that  he’s  really  willing  to  get  his  hands  dirty  to  help  those  in  need  .  u  need  help  moving  ?  someone  to  keep  u  company  while  u  babysit  ?  feel  nervous  walking  alone  after  class  at  night  ?  sammy  might  leave  u  on  read  if  u  text  him  bc  he’s  a  Dumb  Bitch  like  that  but  he’ll  show  up  on  the  dot  ,  hands  in  pockets  ,  exactly  where  u  asked  him  to  be  ready  to  do  what  u  asked  him  to  do  .  the  mans  is  a  super  hard  worker

he  def  still  feels  kinda  weird  at  uni  ?  he’s  p  smart  but  some  of  the  classes  unrelated  to  athletics  and  anatomy  have  given  him  a  REALLY  tough  time  (  dance  appreciation  for  his  fine  arts  credit  almost  tanked  his  gpa  LMAO  )  and  he’s  not  top  of  his  class  or  anything  but  ppl  still  try  to  talk  to  him  bc  of  the  whole  “  famous  dad  ,  future  olympian  ”  thing  ,  which  he  can  pick  up  from  a  mile  a  way  and  makes  him  super  uncomfortable  .  even  being  in  a  frat  w  a  bunch  of  old  money  rich  boys  makes  him  DEF  feel  like  the  odd  one  out  ,  and  he’s  just  counting  down  the  days  until  he’s  OUT  OF  HERE

in  conclusion  :  i  love  u  all  .  lets  suffer  together  .  :~)