#I CAN FINALLY CHECK ​36* THE ABYSS OFF MY LIST

[neuvillettes]

after a year and a half of playing this stupid game i finally did it 🥹

[cyberkevvideo]

Throne of Night Theory Builds Part 10: The Drama Creating Doppelganger

In August 2015, Gary McBride of Fire Mountain Games released the cover of Book 6 for Throne of Night, and discussed how there’d be a doppelganger that would meet up with the adventuring party and “has a critical part to play in the drama that unfolds beneath in the depths of the earth.” He also made sure to be vague about the gender, so my assumption is that this particular doppelganger has no gender. You’re seeing it more and more lately, and Pathfinder was definitely do its part in taking down the gender walls. I made sure that the stat block today reflects that.

This one’s going to be short and sweet as it’s after 6 am here. Need to at least try and get some semblance of a normal sleep schedule despite fighting off a cold. Fun times.

All images shared here were done by the forever fantastic and amazingly talented Michael D. Clarke, aka SpiralMagus.

EDIT: Like other parts I’ve released, I promise to clean up the stats later. For now I’m posting this as-is. Late for an appointment. Still working on things with the laptop and not my desktop, unfortunately.

All that’s mentioned in the update from four years ago is what I put in quotations above and that the doppelganger should be showing up “later” in the AP. It’s fairly vague, but given what you’ll likely have to be doing in Book 4, I’m going to assume that, that’s when you meet this individual.

The build uses a couple of things from Ultimate Intrigue. I’m told it’s OGL, but I’m not 100% on that. I’m not looking to publish this so I’ll likely be fine, but my editor always said that if if you’re unsure then to always release all the info on abilities, etc, just to be safe. That’s what he does for his books. Well, did. We’re done with that now and are going as homebrew as possible.

My idea for this creature is that they are infiltrating the drow city in Book 4. Thought maybe they could lay low and live the comfortable life, but soon realized they bit off more than they could chew and is scrambling to not get caught. Can’t use darkness unfortunately, but can use dancing lights and faerie fire, and that’s likely more than enough. Even managed to find a partially used wand of darkness should the need arise. At least, it is for now. Thankfully a party of dwarves/drow are also infiltrating the city, and this is just the chance that doppelganger has been looking for.

Without further ado, the doppelganger that could make or break the adventure.

Just a couple of notes: I’m pretty sure my Sleight of Hand is correct. I’ll have to double check the math, but it might be off by 2 points. As well, I was short on damage, attack to-hit, and hit points, so I increased the racial HD by +1. Pretty sure this individual is supposed to be an ally/new cohort, so I didn’t want to make them too high for HD or else no one could have them for Leadership purposes. Finally, the name, Iden, is from a name generator that jokingly shortened it from “Identical”, and I liked it enough to keep it.

IDEN THE ECHO (CR 12; 19,200 XP) Nonbinary unique Advanced doppelganger rogue (spy) 4/mesmerist (enigma) 1/master spy 5 N Medium monstrous humanoid (shapechanger) Init +5; Senses darkvision 60 ft.; Perception +21 DEFENSE AC 28, touch 18, flat-footed 20 (+4 armor, +2 deflection, +5 Dex, +1 dodge, +6 natural) hp 151 (15 HD; 5d10+10d8+79) Fort +11, Ref +18, Will +16 Defensive Abilities concealed thoughts, evasion, slippery mind, uncanny dodge; Immune charm, sleep OFFENSE Speed 30 ft. Melee +1 merciful sap +19/+14/+9 (2d6+8 nonlethal) or      2 claws +19 (1d8+8) Ranged dagger +16 (1d4+7/19–20) Special Attacks hypnotic stare (enigmatic stare, solipsism), sneak attack +4d6 Spell-Like Abilities (CL 18th; concentration +22)   At will—detect thoughts (DC 16) Spell-Like Abilities (CL 4th; concentration +8)   3/day—dancing lights Master Spy Spell-Like Abilities (CL 5th; concentration +9)   Constant—nondetection   2/day—magic aura Mesmerist Spells (CL 1st; concentration +5)   1st (2/day)—detect secret doors, faerie fire   0 (at will)—detect magic, mage hand, prestidigitation, read magic STATISTICS Str 24, Dex 21, Con 20, Int 18, Wis 18, Cha 18 Base Atk +11; CMB +18; CMD 36 Feats Combat Expertise, Deceitful, Dodge, Great Fortitude, Improved Feint, Iron Will, Power Attack, Sap Adept, Sap Master Skills Acrobatics +19, Appraise +16, Bluff +35 (+39 while using change shape ability), Climb +15, Diplomacy +11, Disable Device +16 (+18 with tools), Disguise +27 (+47 while using change shape ability), Escape Artist +18, Linguistics +12, Knowledge (dungeoneering) +8, Knowledge (engineering) +10, Knowledge (local) +14, Knowledge (nobility) +10, Knowledge (religion) +8, Perception +21, Sense Motive +19, Sleight of Hand +16, Stealth +28, Use Magic Device +15; Racial Modifiers +4 Bluff, +4 Disguise Languages Abyssal, Common, Dwarven, Drow Sign Language, Elven, Gnome, Skis'raal, Undercommon SQ art of deception +5, change shape (alter self), elude detection, glib lie (DC 20),mask alignment, master of disguise, mesmerist trick (mesmeric mirror), mimicry, perfect copy, poison use, rogue talents (combat rogue, minor magic), skilled liar +2, superficial knowledge, veiled steps +1 Combat Gear wand of cure light wounds (15 charges), wand of darkness (8 charges); Other Gear +2 glamered shadow leather armor, +1 merciful sap, dagger (4), amulet of mighty fists +1, ring of protection +2, belt of the weasel, buffering cap, headband of intuition, concealable thieves’ tools, wrist sheath SPECIAL ABILITIES Enigmatic Stare (Su) The target of an enigma’s hypnotic stare takes a –4 penalty on Perception checks to notice the enigma. This ability replaces painful stare. Mimicry (Ex) A doppelganger is proficient in all weapons, armor, and shields. In addition, a doppelganger can use any spell trigger or spell completion item as if the spells were on its spell list. Its caster level is equal to its racial Hit Dice. Perfect Copy (Su) When a doppelganger uses change shape, it can assume the appearance of specific individuals. Solipsism (Su) Whenever the enigma uses hypnotic stare on a creature, instead of applying a penalty on the creature’s saving throws, the enigma begins to fade from the creature’s view. Until the enigma’s next turn, the enigma gains the effects of concealment against that creature (unless it can see invisible creatures). Starting on the enigma’s next turn, he gains the effect of invisibility against that creature. These effects last as long as the enigma continues to use his hypnotic stare, but if he takes an action that would end invisibility, it ends his hypnotic stare immediately. The enigma can reinstate this effect whenever he wishes, but each time it begins with 1 round of concealment. This ability alters hypnotic stare. Veiled Steps (Ex) An enigma gains a bonus to their Stealth checks equal to 1/4 their mesmerist level (minimum +1). This ability replaces consummate liar.

[dustedmagazine]

Ian Mathers: Year in Review 2017

If there’s a general thread to be found in all the summings-up of 2017, both here at Dusted and elsewhere, unsurprisingly it mostly seems to be that 2017 was a crap year. It’s been heartening to see many friends and loved ones reflecting on the personal successes they’ve had despite the ongoing decay and dissolution of things on a less personal level, but honestly I can’t even claim that. I’m writing this on just barely the other side of a stomach bug that, between my wife and I, disrupted plans and made things miserable for us for over a week now, and that was just 2017’s last kick at the can in terms of medical problems for two of us. (Hers chronic, mine acute — meaning I have the scarier medical procedure coming up but also the hope things will go back to “normal.”) All of that probably indicates why, despite me finding just as much a respite in music as any of my colleagues, 2017 was my worst year for listening to current music since I started keeping track.

 There’s no magical number of albums or songs one “should” listen to, of course, not even if you write about music, but I think it’s fair to acknowledge that a breadth of listening can be helpful in terms of context and everything else. And of course none of us, these days, can listen to more than a fragment of what’s out there, especially once you add in day jobs, relationships, commuting, sleeping, etc., etc. I don’t so much set a yearly goal for myself as just know how many albums I intended to give a listen to, because of things I’ve read or existing love for a band or songs I hear somewhere or what have you, and the last few years I’ve been mostly successful at getting through that backlog by the end of the year. This year, with 51 records under my belt, I’ve still listened to a lot more than most people out there, albeit not necessarily in the smaller sphere of those of us who read or write for Dusted. But I still have 42(!) albums sitting in my folder, reproaching me. There’s everything from stuff I’ve never heard that colleagues here have made persuasive cases for to new, highly-praised efforts by bands I’ve loved for years. I am not sure exactly what slowed me down all year, but 2017 was a year where I wore my favorite Mountain Goats t-shirt to multiple medical procedures as a lucky talisman and still couldn’t bring myself to play their new album for months after it came out (it’s good; I think I’ll wind up loving it; I haven’t given it enough time yet).  

This, incidentally, is why I enjoy these kind of year-end wrap ups and peeks behind the curtain; god knows there’s no writer who’s an infallible machine, consuming all records of interest and immediately ranking them, but especially on this end of the business where we’re doing it for love, not money, these kinds of things become concerns more often than you might think. I want to read the people I want to read about music because I appreciate their taste, their skill and their passion, not because I think I can select some magic combination that will tell me every record I’ll love that year.  

The happier side to my relatively smaller listening pool in 2017 is that I quickly did find a lot of records I adored, and I played them a lot. External commitments, particularly to Dusted, were basically all that worked to motivate me, so a lot of those records I loved I wrote about here. When it came time to try and draw up a personal best-of I found even after being fairly strict with myself I could only get it down to 25, just under half of the records I spent real time with in 2017. Of those, I wrote about 17 here at Dusted; two more were covered here by others (Patrick Masterson’s excellent piece on Godspeed You! Black Emperor is here and Bill Meyer got me to finally check out Bardo Pond, who I had been correctly suspecting I would love for literally years, here). Then there’s Fujiya & Miyagi’s self-titled album/EP collection, which I had covered the first two thirds of here and here; there’s maybe no better sign of the way the end of 2017 collapsed in on me than that I couldn’t find the time and energy to write up an excellent album by a band I love that I’d been eagerly looking forward to writing about since last year (in any case, it works even better in resequenced album form, please do check it out). After that we’re left with five albums I loved, in some cases for practically all of 2017, that I meant to write about for Dusted, even if just here. After I’ve got my complete list of 25 with links to the reviews as applicable.  

EMA — Exile in the Outer Ring

Erika M Anderson made my favorite record of 2014 and came back this year with another powerfully personal, noisy, prescient and clear-eyed collection of songs, this time aimed at a totally different void than The Future’s Void was. I’m not sure I saw a better horror movie in 2017 than the crawling, dreadful fuzz of “Breathalyzer” (even as the video deflects that, for good reason), but for every trauma this record vivisects (abuse and its effects on “7 Years” and “Where the Darkness Begin,” misogyny on “Receive Love,” poverty on “Down and Out”) there’s a defiant charge like “I Wanna Destroy” or “33 Nihilistic and Female” (or even “Aryan Nation,” maybe the record’s most potent mix of the two) to keep this from being just a plunge into the pessimistic abyss. Anderson’s an honest enough observer and artist that she never pretends to have the answers, or even know how to find them, but this marks six years of her work being absolutely vital. Understanding, diagnosis, defiance, support; in 2017 we need all of them, at once, and plenty of them.

 High Plains — Cinderland

Scott Morgan (aka loscil, who I’ve praised here before) and cellist Mark Bridges first met on residencies at the Banff Centre for the Arts in 2014 and made Cinderland in Wyoming, even though they live in British Columbia and Wisconsin, respectively; all, fittingly enough, for an album so intensely concerned with geography and a kind of sonic terroir. These 9 tracks (coming in at a compact 36:16 total) were recorded using a portable studio, allowing Bridges’ cello, the local Steinway and Morgan’s field recordings and electronic manipulation to be captured in the raw. Even on a track like the piano-sampling “Ten Sleep” this doesn’t just feel like loscil with a cellist playing along, though, and the collaboration ultimately feels like even more than the sum of its parts. Whether it’s the intensely cinematic duo playing on the opening title track or the drop to end all drops on the terrifying “A White Truck” or the luxuriating in the sound of Bridges’ cello on “Black Shimmer,” Cinderland is very much an invitation to this distinct place and time; I suspect it is either the best or worst possible album for playing when driving at night in the winter. 

 Mogwai — Every Country’s Sun

It would be a mistake to assign too much seriousness to Mogwai’s music, however broodingly powerful it might be in action (see the breakdown of how they came up with song titles this time on their YouTube channel for a good example of what I mean), but leaving aside soundtracks and compilations this is the long-running Scottish band’s first album as an official quartet, and it comes after two excellent records that both seemed to embrace their long history (Hardcore Will Never Die, But You Will.) and strike off in exciting new directions (Rave Tapes). Sure enough Every Country’s Sun splits the difference, and hasn’t lost an ounce of muscle, even if on “Don’t Believe the Fife” they really make you wait for it. There’s rarely been a Mogwai track as gentle as “aka 47” or as desert-fried as “20 Size,” but “Party in the Dark” is merely the latest example in a long line that the band function just as well with vocals and the closing title track is maybe their most violently elegiac crescendo since the great “Helicon 1.” Whether it’s the straightforward thrash through “Old Poisons” or the synthesized crunch of “Brain Sweeties,” there’s a little something of everything here.

 The National — Sleep Well Beast

If the main hit against the National for a while was that they kind of just always sounded the same (which was about as true and as damning as it was when it’s been used against anyone from the Ramones on down), then the expanded palette of Sleep Well Beast ought to satisfy. Honestly, for me it took a while to integrate those elements into my listening, particularly because they’re more prominent on the mid-tempo kind of National song that always take longer to blossom for me. But then the National are probably the band I love the most that have the strongest track record of me wondering if I don’t love them any more until I’ve played the new record 5-6 times. Here, even now that I appreciate anew Matt Berninger’s powerfully ambiguous lyrics and performance and the well-oiled interplay of the rest of the band this feels like a bit of a growing-pains record to me; at 56 minutes it feels like a few of the songs could have been trimmed by a minute or two (and the interesting digital collage of the title track should be maybe half the length of its 6:26 and moved back to let “Dark Side of the Gym” end the record, like it feels like it should). But, and this is a very large but, the National still manage to write and play beautifully about emotions I’m not sure anyone else quite hits and they still felt like an essential part of my year.

 SubRosa — Subdued Live at Roadburn 2017          

After you listen to enough music, love enough things, it’s rare enough for a band to stop you in your tracks on first listen. It’s even rarer for the same band to manage the same thing twice — after all, part of the very stunning effect in the first place is the surprise of the new. Salt Lake City’s SubRosa is now the only band to manage to do this to me, not just twice, but twice with the same song. I first heard their song “Whippoorwill,” from 2011’s No Help for the Mighty Ones and was instantly transfixed by the song and the band’s crushing, transcendent doom metal (complete with electric violins). I didn’t even know until recently that the band and the Roadburn festival had put out this 2017 live set, their first time playing the more acoustic “Subdued” versions anywhere except around their home turf. The first track here is “Whippoorwill,” now mesmerizing in a completely distinct way from the album version, and the rest of the album follows suit. Every rendition here, from the earliest material to songs from 2013’s More Constant Than the Gods, is undertaken with a patient gravitas and a stark beauty that is neither more or less beautiful than the more conventionally metal album versions, but instead somehow makes both these versions and the original even more profoundly moving and powerful. For the first time in a long time, I found myself unable to do anything else for the entire length of my first listen to this album.

Favourites of 2017

Anastasia Minster — Hour of the Wolf

Bardo Pond — Under the Pines

Blanck Mass — World Eater

Demen — Nektyr

DREAMDECAY — YÚ

Elbow — Little Fictions

EMA — Exile in the Outer Ring

Fovea Hex — The Salt Garden II

Fujiya & Miyagi — Fujiya & Miyagi

Godspeed You! Black Emperor — Luciferian Towers

High Plains — Cinderland

Jens Lekman — Life Will See You Now

Joe Goddard — Electric Lines

Kelly Lee Owens — s/t

King Woman — Created in the Image of Suffering

Los Campesinos! — Sick Scenes

Mew — Visuals

Mogwai — Every Country’s Sun

The National — Sleep Well Beast

Saltland — A Common Truth

Sam Amidon — The Following Mountain

Shooting Guns — Flavour Country

Slowdive — Slowdive

SubRosa — Subdued Live at Roadburn 2017

Xiu Xiu — Forget

[brianculmo]

A Trip Around the WURL Part 2: Survival

The WURL has been on my list pretty much since I moved to Utah. reading about it is extremely daunting, and this is one of the few things that gets crazier the more you familiarize yourself with it. Primer on the WURL for the uninitiated: 

-WURL= Wasatch Ultimate Ridge Linkup

-Ridgeline traverse of the entire Little Cottonwood Canyon watershed

-36+ miles

-20,000ft+ climbing

-15+ named peaks and many more unmamed ones (some informally named ones; I’m looking at you Gary, UPWOP, There will be Blood)  

-Mostly ridgeline scrambling class 3-5 climbing, very little on an actual trail

-Brainchild of the legendary Jared Campbell

-More info, a better description, and a list of finishers of this thing can be found on the official website for the routon Jared’s website: https://door5.com/2015/08/23/wasatch-ultimate-ridge-linkup-wurl/

Just getting to the ridge is a major task for most hikers and runners, so reconing the route can be tedious and lengthy efforts. Luckily I was in full mountain 100 miler training, so the vert and technicality to check out the route was right up my alley. With the emotional and physical abyss left behind from my DNS at High Lonesome 100 I was in need of a new challenge to occupy my mind and my legs. I kicked the idea of at least doing recon the route more this summer for a while, but things really kicked into reality when I tagged along on a Cottonwood traverse with Aaron and Justin. Doing the first third of the route planted the seed big time. I was ready to dive in 100%. I set a goal for myself to making an attempt 2 weeks later. I knew I had to do it soon, and without overthinking it to avoid backing out. I knew the more I knew about everything would probably deter me from trying something so stupid. Either way, I spent the next 2 weeks devoting all my spare time training and figuring out the logistics of this thing. There's no water virtually anywhere on the route, and by the time I started, I had only done less than half of the route total. They say ignorance is bliss, and I definitely felt I was toeing the line between preparedness and excitement for the unknown.

More on my prep leading up to the WURL in part 1 of this post here: http://borderlinedesigns.tumblr.com/post/166513257316/a-trip-around-the-wurl-pt1-getting-there

Before I knew it I found myself at Ferguson Canyon Trailhead at 4AM with Seth Myer who was going to join me on the first 10ish miles to Superior. Upon arrival we found Drew Peterson who was simultaneously embarking on his WURL attempt. We exchanged a few pleasantries, and he set off about 2 minutes ahead of us. I assumed i would see him again at some point, I was wrong. I kind of saw him twice, once near the top of BF twins, and then way later as his lamp was descending the notch at like 2 AM the next night and I was sitting on South Thunder. Huge props to his incredible Solo 23hr ish finish!

The first big climb was controlled and we were able to navigate the tricky ascent to the correct ridge coming out of Ferguson. We were making decent time up to BF twins and across the ridge. I really wasn't worried about speed, just about moving as efficiently as possible. As we got close to Monte Cristo, It was apparent I was moving a little faster than Seth, so we separated, and I pressed on. I made it down to Cardiff Pass in around 7hrs30min. I was planning on meeting a friend there with water, but I was way ahead of my predicted time there and he was about an hour away, so I was without luck. I was kind of out of water, and needed some to get to my next crew point at Catherine Pass. I ran into another runner on the ridge, a guy who I no know is Ben Jensen, who was gracious enough to offer me some extra water. I also found the leftover water cache from Drew who was about an hour ahead of me at this point. He had left a few liters with a note to me saying I could take whatever I needed. This was literally a lifesaver.Usually I’m against raiding others cached supplies, but there was a note and I knew Drew was ahead and did not need this water anymore. Huge Thanks to Drew and Ben for saving my ass!

The next section is relatively cruiser. There was kinda a trail at some points! I knew I had a ton of miles and peaks ahead, so even though I was feeling good in this section, I was consciously taking it easy. There were no cutoffs to fight, and I was on my own timeline to just finish. Feeling good was more important than being a few minutes faster. Eventually I made it to Catherine Pass where Justin was waiting with a Mountain Dew, some snacks and most importantly his great attitude and company. Justin joined me as we did Devils Castle which was gloriously wild. We had a grand ole’ time piecing our way through one of the cruxes of the route technically speaking. It was a high point for me for sure, I was feeling good and moving good. We just kept plugging along and just focused one step at a time. I acquired my stash of food that I left atop Sugarloaf lift at Alta, and we pushed on to Snowbird tram station where I was beyond excited to eat some pizza. We got to Snowbird at like 6pm and there were a lot of tourists hanging out up there having taken the tram up. It was bizarre experience being halfway through this ridiculous feat, and having no one else having any idea what I was going through. I really enjoy those moments where the crazy feats of ultrarunning, and big endurance efforts intersect with “normal” society.

Justin left me at Snowbird and took the tram back down to his car. I was alone to do the Bullion Divide solo until I met up with Aaron at Red Lakes Pass. As the sun was setting I was feeling decent, the scale of the day starting to catch up to me. I just had to focus on just moving forward. I had put my headphones in going up Red Baldy and was just plugging along to music. Then randomly my headphone cord snagged on a rock and ripped my phone out of my pocket and straight off a 400ft cliff. I noticed only as the music cut out. Upon inspection I realized my phone was way out of reach. I could have maybe down climbed off the ridge to grab it, but I figured it was gonna be like a half hour excursion and probably on heinous, loose rock. I decided to just make a mental note as to where it was, and come and grab it during the week. (At the time I forgot my wallet and ID were in my phone case, so I probably should of went to get it. I wasn’t in physical shape to be able to go look for my phone until over a week later. After 2 unsuccessful search missions up into the random rock field high in white pine drainage, I gave up and the phone is now lost forever to the mountain.) At the time, i actually didnt even care that much. Being 18+ hours into my day, I was solely focused on finishing the WURL, and literally everything else was of secondary concern. My effort over the next many hours took my complete attention and dedication to get through, and the phone really wasn't gonna help me.

I was able to push on up and over white Baldy as the sun was setting. I made a few primal yells to Aaron who was waiting below on the ridge, he made some noises back, so I knew he was there somewhere. Who needs a phone in communicating when you can just hoot and holler in the mountains? The descent off white baldy proved to be particularly terrible. This section is just a nasty, sharp, loose rock pile in which its pretty easy to veer off into a worse, nastier, looser rock face. I was starting to get pretty bummed about losing my phone, and was pretty over everything at that point. I just wanted to get to Aaron, so I wouldn't have to think anymore. No matter how I felt getting to Aaron below Pfeifferhorn, it never crossed my mind to pull the plug there. I couldn’t allow myself the room to think about not finishing, it would be too easy to give in to those thoughts.

When I got to Aaron, I was quite thrashed from my hairy descent off white baldy and wanted to just take a nap. Aaron didn't let me, instead I drank some coke and pushed on following in his steps. I told Aaron that I couldn’t really think/ make route decisions at this point and that it was best for me to just follow him. I was too nervous I would just wander off the ridge into the abyss. Thinking about anything beyond the immediate moves ahead of me was too overwhelming and I tried (pretty unsuccessfully) to block those thoughts out. Pfieff and UPWOP were a welcome reprieve as we just plugged along. I had never been on anything beyond Pfiefferhorn before, so It was crucial having Aaron with me. I cannot imagine navigating myself through that solo.

Things got real in the middle of the night near South Thunder. At this point, eating had become more difficult than before and my general moral was shifting from focused and moving forward to exhausted anxiety. I knew there was some crux sections still to go, and I was growing increasingly anxious for the final few hurdles.

The very recent tragedy of fellow local mountain enjoyer, Zac Zimmerman and the unfortunate accident that cost him his life were very much on mine and Aaron’s mind. Zac had died only 2 months prior on the exact section we were about to travel through. As someone who takes calculated risks in the high alpine, I was particularly saddened by the accident. I was never fortunate enough to meet Zac, but everyone who I know who did get to spend time with him spoke highly of his positive demeanor and love of the mountains. Even starting the WURL with such recent events heavy on the mind was hard. I purposely was quiet about my intentions in respect for those close to Zac. My attempt was in all respect to Zac and his family. I wanted to uphold his legacy and continue on pursuing mountain adventures as he would have surely wanted. As the popular hashtag #livelikezac evokes, we need not live in fear and away from the places that bring us happiness, but embrace the journey in beautiful places spent with great friends.

As we neared Bighorn, Aaron mentioned and described the exact place of Zac’s accident. Aaron was familiar with the area and knew what laid ahead. He was confident in our ability to get through it safely. I trusted him, and I tried to trust myself despite a sea of emotions of self doubt and anxiety. I told Aaron that I didn’t want to know the exact spot of the accident, as it would surely make things worse. Things were still really bad. I’d say I was pretty close to a full on panic attack at 3am on some scary ridge, some 23 hours into this crazy adventure. I had no choice but to continue on. I just had to focus intensely on each individual move. I had already overcome so much, I was capable of everything ahead of me. I just had to execute.

We reached the summit of Lone Peak right as the sun was starting to peek over the mountains to the east. I had never been atop Lone Peak before, and it felt fitting to summit in such a ridiculous fashion and circumstances. My anxiety did not subside being on the last summit. We still had a long ways to go. I was determined to get the legitimate WURL finish by exiting Bells Canyon. This route is definitely the worst/hardest way off Lone Peak.  I had heard nightmarish tales of The Notch; a super steep chute of loose rock and snow that deposits into upper bells. Luckily we were able to navigate through The Notch and into the rock field below in the daylight. The descent was as bad as advertised; sketchy at best, death defying at worst. At this point my feet were oddly sore. I had basically destroyed my shoes by now. The outsole and foam had completely ripped off both heels and other chunks were straight up missing. Those sharp rocks destroy everything. The arches of my feet were oddly bruised and sore to the point where every single step was painful on both feet. Again, I didn't have a choice but to push on. My feet weren't going to get better with rest, and I just needed to get myself out of the woods; easier said than done. From the bottom of the notch until the time we finally intersected with the trail was a solid hour of boulder hopping and wandering in a hopeful direction. 

Finding the trail was a sweet relief, but I still had at least 5-6 miles more to go, and my feet were excruciatingly painful by now. It was 8AM when we hit the trail. I somehow got it in my head that I wanted to finish in under 30 hours, which meant by my semi delirious math that we had to push to get out in time. 6 miles downhill on a trail in 2 hours seems easy to most, but this was right on the edge of my ability at the time. I knew we were going to be close, and that We couldn't slow down or stop at all. This is where I really dug deep into the well, like very few times I ever have. Every time I put a foot down I wanted to scream out in pain. I felt like I was going to pass out from the pain. We shuffle/ran/powerwalked every step the last 2 hours. Stopping at all was out of the question and would undoubtedly result in a mental/physical/emotional breakdown. As we got closer I started to open up on the slightly less technical trail. I made the realization that running faster, while still extremely painful, wasn't any worse than running slow. I put a move on and just pushed to the end. I was somehow dropping Aaron and probably running sub 7 minutes the last mile. When I got to the trailhead I literally showed Aaron the time on my watch and collapsed.

29 hours 53 minutes. I had gotten through one of the toughest physical, mental and emotional challenges of my life. It took all my energy to get through, and was fully committing. I couldn’t stand up or get myself to do anything but cry in pain. Even just lying down was excruciating. I found my limit and went beyond it, not by choice but by necessity. The last third of the route was almost straight survival and I had to deploy every single strategy to keep myself moving forward and from going into a full emotional breakdown. Upon completion I let the emotions come, but I was so spent nothing really mattered. I just wanted to lie down. After Aaron dropped me off at my truck (which is my house), I was without contact with the outside world with no phone or anything. I tried to sleep, but it was midday in the summer and it was stupid hot. My feet burned in pain, even while lying down. I was wrecked.

Eventually my life got put together. I went through the charade of getting a replacement phone while limping around town. It took me a solid 4-5 days to be able to walk normally again. I am still unsure as to what happened with my feet as it stumped even my doctor. It took another week to be able to go search for my phone unsuccessfully. I replaced my card and ID. Life went on as normal, and to me that was just great. I felt back on track after this monumental effort. I had successfully done something very few people have done. My WURL finish was a step in confirming my previously shakey self identity as a mountain runner. I was eager to take the success from the WURL and turn it into another good performance at my recently decided next challenge: IMTUF 100 miler in September.

More on IMUTF100 coming soon…