#I AM SO SORRY GIRL IT TOOK ME FOREVER TO GET THIS FINISHED!

[thatnewweeb]

Childhood Sweethearts | Bakugo Katsuki

Summary | You moved to America when you were young, having to leave behind your childhood sweetheart. After moving back to Japan, you'll find out if things have changed between you two

Content | Fluff, honestly I can't think of any warnings for this so let me know if you see anything that needs a warning

Word Count | 1.7k+

A/N | I love the idea of Bakugo being in love with someone through his whole life, I have no idea why. At the time of posting, I wrote this forever ago

It had been almost 5 whole years since you moved away. You missed home. It wasn't like you'd wanted to move away in the first place, but your dad's job took you away from Japan all the way to America.

Finally, at 18 years old, you finally convinced your parents to allow you to move home. Having attended an elite hero school for the past 2 years, you managed to have some special arrangements made for your return home.

And so, that is how you got to where you are now, nervously walking down the halls of UA next to Principal Nezu. He had spent the first half hour of the morning before classes began showing you around and explaining a few things to you.

At the start of homeroom at 8:25AM, he walks you to the classroom of Class 3-A, the class you will be joining, starting today.

Everyone looks over as the door opens, the principal strolling in and standing at the front of the class. You follow nervously. These people have had nearly 3 whole years to get to know each other, and here you are, the new girl joining in the final year, not knowing anyone.

At least, you didn't think you knew anyone, until you force yourself to look at the class properly.

Your eyes immediately fall on a blond boy in the second row. His own eyes are widened, locked onto you. A moment later, you rip your eyes away from him, prompting him to look away also.

When you realise Nezu has stopped speaking and is now looking at you, you snap out of it and look at the whole class.

"My name is Y/N. I have two Quirks, which I am sure I will have more time sometime soon to explain. I look forward to spending this year with you." You say and bow slightly to the class.

Your homeroom teacher, Aizawa, points you to your assigned seat, so you sit down quietly, not saying another word.

It isn't until lunch, almost four hours later, that you say anything else, besides answering questions in class. Your fourth period was English with Present Mic. Having lived in an English-speaking country for almost 5 years, it was quite an easy class for you.

Almost as soon as you are dismissed from class, you're surrounded by people, wanting to talk to you, get to know you. You're fine with that, but you did have someone else you wanted to talk to. They already walked out the door though.

"Y/N!" Someone says, popping up in front of you out of nowhere.

"Izuku!" You smile, excitedly throwing your arms around your old friend.

You see a brown-haired girl blushing as she watches you hugging Midoriya.

"I can't believe you're here! I didn't know you were coming back!"

You nod. "I know, I'm sorry I didn't say anything."

He shakes his head, wanting to reassure you. "It's okay! We fell out of touch, that's not anyone's fault."

Izuku invites you to spend lunch break with him and his friends, being introduced to them all, him explaining a little about how he got into UA at all.

After classes have finished for the day, you don't give Bakugo the chance to run. As soon as you're dismissed from class, you walk over to his desk, standing in front of it and resting your hands on the surface.

"It's nice to see you again, Katsuki." You smirk.

He looks up at you from his chair briefly, quickly looking away. “Yeah, it is.”

You lean down so you’re closer to his height, him still avoiding eye contact. “Would you mind walking me back to the dorm? I haven’t actually been there yet, Nezu didn’t have time to take me.”

He tuts but stands up, picking up his bag and slinging it over your shoulder. Not saying a thing, he leaves the classroom, you following him. You know what he’s like, you know to follow.

As soon as you're out of the halls and outside, he decides to say something. "I didn't know you were coming back." He mutters.

You're just happy to hear him say something to you. "Yeah. I know."

He takes a deep breath. "I'm sorry."

You pause where you are, stunned. You hadn't expected him to apologise to you.

When you don't say anything, he sighs and turns to you, also stopping walking. "I shouldn't have stopped responding. I was upset you were gone, and I went about things in the stupidest way. I... I regret it."

It takes a moment for you to say anything, blinking in shock. "It's okay." You smile brightly up at him. "I understand. It was hard on both of us, after all."

"Yeah, but I ghosted you. I shouldn't have done that. Not to you, you don't deserve that."

"I agree you shouldn't have done it, dummy. But I'm saying I understand, okay?"

He smiles a little, looking down at you. "Come on, let's go to the dorms." He tugs on your backpack, indicating that you should take it off. When you do, he slings one strap over his shoulder, carrying it for you.

"Since when did you become a gentleman?" You ask with a small laugh, making him grunt a 'shut up' to you, his cheeks going slightly pink.

Finally reaching the dorms, Bakugo opens the door for you, letting you into the large building.

Everyone else is already there, the people in the communal area looking at you as you enter. Other than Izuku, people seem a little surprised to see you with Bakugo, and even more surprised that he doesn't look as annoyed as he typically does.

With everyone staring, Katsuki shoves your bag back into your arms before walking over to the stairs to go to his room.

You smile a little as you watch him, shaking your head.

Izuku is the first person to come up to you, smiling. "Everyone wants to get to know you a little. If you have some time, come sit with us?"

You do what he says, walking over and taking a seat between him and a boy with a black streak in mostly blond hair.

You end up spending a couple hours with them, telling them about your Quirk and what it's like to live in America. When they ask about you seemingly already knowing both Izuku and Katsuki, you tell them that you grew up with them.

A girl with pink skin, who you learn is Mina, asks you for some stupid stories about them as kids, Izuku going red and telling you that you don't have to talk about anything you don't want to, trying to save himself the embarrassment.

Even though you're unsure if Bakugo will be annoyed at you for telling them this, you also tell them a few stories from when you and him were dating before you left for America.

Everyone seems surprised, a small uproar coming from the class. No one had ever even seen an indication that he had ever been interested in anyone, yet alone had a girlfriend. It appeared to be a ludicrous idea to most of them.

Kaminari seems to deflate a little upon realising you dated one of his best friends. Guess he thought you were pretty.

Not long after, you go find your room, needing to unpack. Right before you close the door, a foot stops it from closing. A second later, Bakugo comes into view.

"Well, hello there." You smirk a little, looking up at him.

He smirks back, placing a hand on the doorframe, standing in front of you. "Hey. Care if I come in?"

You move out the way for him to come in but tell him it's a little messy because you're still unpacking.

He doesn't even look at the room, closing the door as soon as he's inside and standing close to you, essentially pinning you between him and the door.

That's when you really realise how much he's changed. He's so much taller now than when you last saw him, his shoulders broader, entire body more muscular, a few visible scars now. The whole thing makes you a little flustered.

"So, do you have a little American boyfriend now?" He asks with a slight snarl, expression turning into a smirk as soon as you shake your head. "No? Then, would you mind if I kissed you?" He whispers in your ear.

You don't verbally respond, but the look on your face gives him the answer he needs. He keeps one hand on the wall, the other coming to rest on your waist, leaning in and pressing his lips against yours. Your own hands find your way to his chest, gripping onto his shirt.

A moment later, he pulls away a little, smirking. "Guess we haven't missed a beat, huh?"

You laugh, not letting go of his shirt. "Suki, you're an ass." You say, making him laugh too.

"Yeah, but you love it." He whispers, leaning in to kiss you again. "It's starting to get late, and you haven't finished unpacking yet. If you wanted to stay in my room tonight, you're welcome to."

You look up at him, a little surprised by the proposal. When he sees the look on your face, he panics a small amount. "I didn't mean it like that! I meant we can spend the night sleeping together- no, not sleeping together! Not like that! I just meant- we- we can- I meant-"

You giggle at his nervousness, making him look a little angry. You move your hands to rest on his cheeks, standing on your tiptoes and smashing your lips against his.

When you finally break the kiss again, both a little breathless, he stares at you, mouth open slightly.

"Sorry, I had to find a way to shut you up." You smile. "I'd love to cuddle tonight, Suki."

He looks relieved, taking your hand. "Come on, let's go."

You spend the rest of the night in Bakugo's dorm, cuddling and eventually falling asleep in his bed.

Before he falls asleep, he spends a few moments just watching you, barely being able to believe that he got lucky enough to get you back into his life. He gives you a soft kiss on the forehead, holding you tighter, closing his own eyes and falling asleep.

[jo-com]

Oscar but with a very dear-like girlfriend (she's very shy, skittish and very rare to see on social media because she avoids the cameras like the plague)

🩰 ‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊ ୨ৎ ➛ Bambi

Oscar Piastri x Fem!reader

Summary: Based of the request☝🏻

Genre: Fluff and a little bit of SMAU

Fc: Kathryn Bernardo

Note: there are some grammar errors and i am sorry if i just answered this request now, i was finishing some of my og works in my draft soo i hope you enjoyed this!!.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ➛ My Masterlist

─────── ─ ⊹⁺ 💋⋅˚₊𐙚 ─ ───────

The bustling city roared with excitement— the mix of music and chatters filled the lively streets. Within that, two friends were walking amongst the crowd when they suddenly spotted one particular driver that was walking at the side with a girl?

With nerves that fueled both their curiosity and joy, they slowly approached the couple with smiles that stretched across their faces.

One of them lightly tapping Oscar’s shoulder making the couple turn around to completely face the two. “Uhm hi, me and my friend saw you guys and were wondering to get a picture?”she spoke, some of her words came out stuttered.

Before answering, Oscar looked back at you— his eyes curling into questionable ones,”Is that alright with you my love?” He asked, his tone soft and gentle. Like he always have with you.

“Yeah baby it’s fine” you muttered, your voice barely audible, but was loud enough for him to hear.

Oscar knew how anxious and shy you get whenever there are others; it was a habit you developed when you were small that came with you throughout adulthood. Luckily you met a guy who was willingly patient for you to open up.

And you were forever grateful for that.

The two friends looked at awe at their relationship, their eyes shined with adoration, but their minds still processing the new found information.

It was never said or announced that Oscar had a girlfriend— she was also rarely seen in both the media and the paddock. So they were shock to see a girl that nestled close to his embrace.

Oscar coughed, getting the attention of the two, he smiled at them and answered back politely, “yeah sure, we can take a picture.”

The two girls squealed with happiness as they put out their phone and took one or two shots of pictures.

After that, the friends thanked them both and let them to enjoy the lively city.

…

Liked by 3,678 others

Randm_girlie OMFG JS MET THE OSCAR PIASTRI (I still can’t believe it)

Tagged; @M_Bff

View all the comments

Username1 WAIT WHO IS HE WITH

Username2 wth who is she!?!!

Username3 Does @Mclaren know abt this!

Username4 EWWW WTF

Username5 I’ve not seen her in the paddock

Randm_girlie CHILL GUYS, it’s his gf and she’s very pretty in person💕

Username6 ohh gross

Username7 js like u??

Username8 WAIT I JUST SAW HER INSTA

Username9 damn that fast?

Username8 It’s @Just.yn but it’s private

Username16 saw them once, they’re perfect

Username17 SHES NICE ASF AND GETS VERY SHY I LOVE HER

…

With that single picture— the two of you have been the talk of the social. People from his circle and friend group asked numerous times who you were and whether or not the rumors were true.

They were honestly begging for details.

“My baby is so famous”, Oscar joked, his hand sliding up to caress your cheeks.

You playfully rolled your eyes and pouted, “Not funny osc, you know how i hate attention.”

Oscar let out a few giggle and pinched your cheeks. “Too late baby, you’re just too adorable that people are so interested in you.”

“Should i be jealous?” He added, his face jokingly shifted into a shock.

You happily laughed back at his antics. The two of you sharing a laugh as you guys joked around some more.

…

Liked by Mclaren, Just.yn, Charles_leclerc and 4,789,701 others

Oscarpiastri Compilation of me and her (this is the closest you will get to seeing her pictures)

Tagged; @Just.yn

View all comments

Username10 SHES SO PRETTY WHAT

Username11 R U GATEKEEPING HER SIR??

Oscarpiastri yes she’s mine forever

Username12 CAN SHE BE MINE

Oscarpiastri uhm no.

Username13 Admin come get ur boy

Landonorris No wonder you don’t hangout with me anymore🙁

Oscarpiastri she’s way better ngl

Username14 BRUTAL😭

Username15 WAIT SHE KINDA FINE

Oscarpiastri KINDA??? Girl please she’s hella fine

McLaren We need to teach you some selfcontrol☺️

…

I hope i did it okay?? Idk it felt off🥹🥹

[fqlling4it]

teenager in love | lando norris x popstar! reader

yourusername

liked by landonorris, pietra.pilao and others

yourusername me and the boyfie

view all 23,267 comments

user36 hello????

↳ yourusername hey girl 😁

user31 since when ????

↳ user19 nah that’s what i’m saying because she dropped a breakup song and dipped and comes back with a boyfriend ????

lilymhe why am i just finding out about this ???

↳ yourusername sorry babes, i’ll text you! 💗

user81 mother leaves for a year and a half and comes back with a boyfriend ???

user4 who cares? let me be your boyfie instead

↳ user373 get UP bro

sabrinacarpenter pretty pretty girl

↳ yourusername ahhh love you 💗

landonorris

liked by oscarpiastri, maxfewtrell, and others

landonorris aug 24. sun and things ☀️

view all 23,171 comments

user63 woah woah woah

↳ user84 he really though he could just sneak in that second photo and we wouldn’t notice

maxfewtrell great girl you’ve got mate

↳ landonorris she says it was nice to meet you

oscarpiastri seems like you’ve had a great summer

↳ landonorris wonderful break with some time away from you 😂

user71 thirst trapping like it’ll make us ignore that second pic

user4 he has a girlfriend????

alex_albon finally! no more fifth wheeling george and i (lily says hi)

↳ landonorris years in the making! (she says hi back!)

yourusername added to their story!

[story 1: ootd 💗]

[story 2: picnic turned into lego building!]

view story replies

landonorris you didn’t post my finished product ☹️

↳ yourusername it would’ve ruined the softlaunch i fear 💔

landonorris just hardlaunch, problem solved 😁

↳ yourusername after the song releases

landonorris song???

carmenmmundt you two are so cute, it was great having a double date the other day! 💗

↳ yourusername no third wheeling you and george anymore ☺️

carmenmmundt my baby’s all grown up now ☹️💔

user73 is that a mclaren lego set girlie? 🤔

user4 nooooooooooo please just one chance i beg 🙏

lilymhe this is still insane to me

↳ yourusername you literally knew i had a crush on him 😞

lilymhe i thought it was a joke, i would’ve done some matchmaking baby

↳ yourusername god bless your boyfriend (🤮) for getting us together ☺️

sabrinacarpenter girl get your ass in the studio and leave the man

↳ yourusername what if i tell you i wrote a song about him ☺️

sabrinacarpenter hmmm cute, send it my way baby 🥰

yourusername

liked by landonorris, sabrinacarpenter and others

yourusername teenager in love out at midnight! (no official photoshoot this time, enjoy the photos my man took 😁)

view all 18,372 comments

lilymhe hello????

↳ yourusername hi lily!!! 😁

user821 mother may have a boyfriend but at least we get a new song

landonorris so excited to hear it!!

↳ yourusername hope you like it 💗

user832 mother just one lyric please please 🙏

↳ yourusername and you make me feel like i’ll be forever young 😁

user4 gonna pretend this songs about me instead of her man ☺️

↳ user81 bro get UP

landonorris

liked by oscarpiastri, yourusername and others

landonorris girlfie’s new song is out, enjoy! (yes, it’s about me 😁) yourusername

view all 19,382 comments

yourusername my boyfie 💗

↳ landonorris my girlfie 💗

sabrinacarpenter that’s my girlfie btw

↳ yourusername love love love you pretty girl 😘

user4 him of all people ???? him????

↳ yourusername pls refrain from being mean to my boyfie, he’s cute and i love him 😁💗

alex_albon next double date when ?

↳ georgerussell63 make that a triple date

↳ landonorris soon soon, asking the girlfie now!

user832 ok they’re kinda cute though

↳ user93 no fr, the way he made a whole post about her new song ???

user81 mama y papa

oscarpiastri no more moping around the garage that she can’t be there 🙏

↳ landonorris i do NOT mope, false allegations

user12 ok but have yall even listened to the lyrics ????

↳ user89 like they’re so cute together ☹️

lilymhe hard launched finally?

↳ landonorris indeed! made me wait until she released MY song 😁

yourusername added to their story!

[story 1: passenger princess life 🙌🙌]

[story 2: little dinner celebration 💗]

[really-fanny-longbottom]

okay sooooo

i had this little thought right

okay so maybe like reader has been a part of the inner circle for a looooong time like since the batboys were kids and they've all been friends forever, naturaly azriel has been in love with her since then, and a few years ago he realised they were mates (she doesn't know)

this one time she walks into the townhouse in just a bra and trousers, casually just walking in drinking coffee while the rhys and cass are just flabbergasted (cass being cass is eyeing the goods real hard because shes always been hot and he knows it) rhys is smirking and all (hes no less honestly)

then az walks in and hes just like what the fuck, she tries to explain smth happened to her shirt on the way and hes just grumbling and takes off his own shirt and is like put this own (cass is naturally making comments that make az's blood boil)

then you can choose where that goes from there

lmfaoooo im so sorry i couldn't get this idea out of my head

its okayyyy if you can't write it!!!

hi! sorry it took me so long to post but i've been really busy with university and only now have i had some free time.

anyway, here it is! thank you so much for this request, i loved writing it!

i hope you like it! 🫶🏻

my hero

summary: a small but very happy incident.

warnings: none

pairings: azriel x reader

words: 2.2k

tick 

tack

tick 

tack 

"ugh," a heavy groan escaped your lips at the sound of the clock. you seated slightly, your head pounding without mercy. 

as you looked at the window, your eyes fought against the early sunlight, before adjusting and finally allowing you to fully open them.

it took you a few seconds to remember your surroundings, and to be honest, to remember anything. 

the confusion didn't last long when all the memories from last night hit you all at once. 

you had gone out for the night with morrigan. you went to rita's for a girls night.

a night with a lot of drinking and dancing and singing and drinking again — mysterious headache solved.

you looked down on you, seeing the shiny short black dress you had chosen for last night specifically. 

you passed your hands through your messy hair and took a glance at your bedroom, absorbing the chaos that a very drunk you had caused.

how could just a person cause such a mess?

tick 

tack

tick

tack

"ugh!" a loud annoyed groan left your lips again

at the sound of the clock that kept attacking your brain. 

before you could think twice, you turned and reached out to punch the clock, causing it to fall to the ground.

you lowered yourself on the bed sheets with an arm over your head.

this was going to be a very long day.

and that's when it you.

your eyes and two seconds later, your legs were fighting against the bed sheets. 

after losing that battle, you ended up falling to the ground with a loud noise. 

a small 'huff' came out of your mouth before getting up and running to the clock as quickly as possible to check the time. 

10:07 am

"oh, shit."

you were late for your internship at the clinic.

"oh, shit."

you quickly begin to look for clean clothes at the same time you try to get rid of your dress. 

you manage to find something that looked relatively clean and put it on, your heart racing as you tried to get your hair to not look like a complete mess.

when you finished putting your hair in a more presentable state, you hurried to put on your shoes, but when you noticed the time again, you only managed to put on a sock before grabbing the first pair of shoes in sight and running out of your room. 

as you run for the stairs, you didn't have time to react before a body collided with yours and spilled coffee all over your t-shirt.

the hot contents against your skin forced you to let out a small scream and dropped the shoes to the floor as you struggled to pull the fabric of your t-shirt away from your body. 

"shit, shit, shit!" you cursed at the same time you blew on your t-shirt.

great, as if your day wasn't already going badly. 

"sorry," a small voice said.

you met your attacker's gaze as you looked up to see a beautiful female with green eyes and brown hair — morrigan's friend. 

right, you had forgotten that she had come home with the two of you — with mor. 

the female looked mortified as you stared at her annoyed. when you saw her opening her mouth to say something, you quickly stopped her.

"don't," you raised your hand at her, you didn't have time for this, "just. . .just go."

you pointed at morrigan's bedroom, whose door was slightly open. the female followed your direction, shrinking a little as she passed through you.

"idiot!" you cursed quietly. 

you looked at your bedroom and considered your options: the chances that you may find a new clean t-shirt in the middle of that mess, were very low and you were already late.

so you gave up and made your way down the stairs, starting to unbutton your shirt before completely taking it off, leaving you in your black lacy bra, and entering the kitchen.

rhysand and cassian who had been enjoying a late breakfast found themselves speechless upon your entrance. 

their gazes followed you as you moved to the sink and started working on removing the stain.

the males shared a gaze between them, identical smirks forming on both of their faces.

"good morning, y/n." rhysand greeted you as he took a sip of his tea cup.

you jumped startled, your eyes found theirs immediately, "gods, i didn't see you there."

rhysand's smirk grew wider. "oh, we know."

"did you get mugged?" cassian asked as he took in your figure.

you were barefoot with only one sock and shirtless.

"what?" you asked confused. 

cassian's eyes roam over your body.

"oh, no, morrigan's friend though it was a good idea to spill her coffee over me. freaking idiot," you murmured the last part, still focused on the task in hand.

cassian let out a snort "well, i'll make sure to thank her personally for this amazing view."

you rolled your eyes at his comment "oh, shut up, cassian. we grew up together, we've all seen each other naked at one point."

rhys smirked and grew before adding "sure, but we were either kids or teenagers at those times." 

cassian glanced at his brother, amusement all over his features "maybe we should go back to those times."

with another roll of your eyes, you tried to suppress a smile at your friend's comment while trying to get rid of the stain.

as on cue, the shadowsinger entered the kitchen to join his brothers for breakfast.

instead, he was surprised with a view of you shirtless — his shirtless mate.

the very reason, rhys and cassian had begun to tease you in the first place. 

what made this whole situation much funnier — the fact that you weren't aware of this detail. 

and things had just become a lot more interesting now with azriel in the room. 

his eyes widened at the sight of you but when he turned to find his brothers, his eyes darkened and a low growl was released.

"nice of you to join us, brother," cassian said casually as he leaned back in his seat and crossed his arms over his chest.

he can practically feel the heat coming off of azriel, like smoke coming out of his ears.

"what's wrong, az?" rhys asked him, knowing exactly what was going on but seeing azriel riled up was too funny to miss it.

at the sound of their voices, you looked up and your eyes found a pair of hazel ones.

"oh, hi, azriel." you greeted him with your sweet smile — the one he liked so much.

the shadowsinger found himself melting at your words, at the way you said his name. 

his eyes instantly softed, a small blush coming to his cheeks and a goofy smile on his lips, "h-hi, y/n." 

you gave him a warm smile before going back to your task.

azriel regained his composure at the sound of his brothers' muffled laughter. 

he sighed and rolled his eyes at their behavior, he hadn't catched a break from them since he revealed the mating bond on one drunken night.

cassian elbowed rhys gently in the ribs to get his attention, when his eyes found his, the general gestured with his head to the shadowsinger. 

"hey, az" cassian tried to contain his urge to laugh, he knew what was about to happen. 

"what?" azriel managed to say, his eyes still on your figure.

"we were just talking. . ." cassian started, his voice teasing "about going back to those times when we were teenagers." 

azriel face scrunched in confusion, he shot his brother a look. 

"you know," cassian continued, his peripheral vision caught rhys trying to control himself  "those times where we didn't care about being naked in front of each other." 

both rhys and cassian snorted at the sight of azriel's face turning red.

"what?!" the male let out a little too loud then he had intended.

rhys proceeded, "yeah, you know. when we didn't care so much about formalities. don't you agree, y/n?" 

you rolled your eyes again at rhys comment, "i think you two have too much free time" you chuckled, "cauldron has mercy on the poor females that will ended up as your mates."

"hey!" both cassian and rhys protested.

azriel smiled at your comment, but it fell when he observed both of his brothers eyes roaming over your body, grins splattered on their features.

azriel moved to the edge of the table, placing his hands on the surface of it before giving them a glare and clenching his jaw.

"stop looking at her like that before i break your faces" he threatened through gritted teeth. 

cassian and rhys were quick to lift their arms in surrender, both muttering a small "yes, sir." 

azriel rolled his eyes in annoyance. his attention was caught when he heard you cursed quietly. 

he sent one last warning look to the two males before moving to stand behind you.

he was so close, that all it took was another step of his for your back to be pressed against his chest.

azriel would love to know the feeling of that sensation, but he remained where he was.

he peeked through your shoulder and saw that you couldn't get rid of the annoying coffee stain. 

"gods, madja is going to kill me for being late." 

without a second thought, azriel took a step back.

"here," he told you.

you turned to find him taking off his own shirt.

your eyes roamed his body — his sun-kissed skin, his muscles, his illyrian tattoos. 

you loved those tattoos. 

"put it on," he extended his hand to you, holding out his shirt.

"oh, that's not necessary, az. i-"

"it's okay, y/n. i- i want you too. by the way, why don't you go get your shoes and i'll take you to the clinic? it's quicker that way and you don't have to walk." 

your face softened, "really? you would do that?" 

the corner of his lips lifted for a small smile, only you to make him feel this way.

"of course." 

you grabbed his shirt, "ugh, thank you, az."

you put it on and azriel tried to not let the sight of your small feature into his too big of a shirt to affect him, but he failed when his heart skipped a beat.

you moved forward and grabbed his cheeks, kissing him on the left one.

caught off guard, azriel tried to hide the fact that his skin had heated up under your touch. 

a new blush came to decorate his cheeks. 

"hm. . .i-" the male couldn't find his words with the sound of his heart roaming in his ears. 

"you're my hero, az" you gave a big smile before making your way to the stairs to collect your shoes. 

azriel stood there in the middle of the kitchen with a hand making it's way to his face to touch the place you kissed him.

cassian and rhys burst out laughing, not being able to remain composed of their brother in love. 

cassian got up from his seat and walked towards his brother, clasping a hand on his back.

"behold of the big bad scary shadow-," cassian leaned over in laughter, "shadowsinger" he managed to complete. 

rhys appeared on his other side, "oh, brother. only if your enemies could see you now, they would think how big of a fool they are."  

azriel clenched his jaw again, and when he turned to answer them, he was stopped by a honey-sweet voice.

"i'm ready," you told him from the entrance.

once again, the shadowsinger was left completely disarmed.

a goofy smile reappeared on his face. 

he didn't even spare a glance at his brothers before making his way to you, "let's go then."

cassian and rhys were left in the kitchen laughing to themselves.

•••

the trip to the clinic was quick.

azriel landed softly on the ground, keeping a hand on your waist and another on your back to make sure you were stable.

you took a step forward before turning to him.

"thank you again, az. you literally just saved my morning." 

and there it was that goofy smile again.

"oh, it's nothing really. my pleasure." 

you let out a small giggle. you reached forward, surrounding his neck with one of your arms and gave him a kiss on the cheek again.

azriel's heart raced and his voice caught in his throat. 

you took a step back "you're my hero, azriel. what would i do without you?" 

you caressed his cheek with the back of your hand before giving him one last smile and moving towards the clinic.

"hm, i-" was all the male managed to say while watching you entering the clinic with his shirt.

he watched as you grabbed the door, and turned to him to wave goodbye. 

azriel returned the gesture. it was at that moment that he realized how much power you had over him.

he didn't push away that feeling, in fact he embraced it.

it was about time to let the walls he had built so long ago disappear. 

and you were the right person for that.

azriel made a decision at that moment.

at the end of the day, he would come pick you up and ask you out on a date.

he would buy you flowers, tell you how he felt and take you to dinner.

he just hoped you felt the same way.

and that you said yes.

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*if you asked to be tagged and you weren't, it's because I couldn't find your blog.

the beautiful dividers belong to @cafekitsune

[gor3-hound]

over again

ft. leon kennedy x fem!reader

cw: 18+ content, dark content, heavy dub-con, forced ddlg, kidnapping, stockholm syndrome, fingering, p in v, creampie, mentions of past drugging, daddy kink, lots of pet names

a/n: took me forever n ever to write this ahhh sorry :/ hope you all enjoy it !! feedback always appreciated !! hopefully the writers block will finally perish.

word count: 1.6k words

14 weeks. 98 days. 2352 hours.

Leon leaves the house at 7.30 am every morning, except for Sundays. From Monday to Thursday, he's home around 6 pm. On Fridays, he isn't home until around 9 pm. Saturdays are the worst because he's home just after lunch.

Usually, when he comes home, he goes to the bedroom and unlocks the door to let you out. He threads his hand in your leash to take you upstairs, giving you a kiss on your forehead as he takes you to the kitchen to eat a meal. He gives you your food on a pink, plastic princess plate with plastic cutlery, and cuts the food into bite size pieces. More often than not, he hand feeds you.

You don't fight it. You'd learned your lesson. You refused food from him once. For 2 out of your 14 weeks locked up in his home, he'd underfed you to the point of starvation until you were begging him to feed you. He sat you in his lap, cooing all sweet as you chewed and swallowed every mouthful he'd given you. That day was the first day he slept with you.

It wasn't all bad. He was sweet. Gentle. If you closed your eyes, you could pretend he was a loving boyfriend. Someone who cared for you, not the creep who'd snatched you from the street after you had a few too many drinks at your friend's party, promising you a better life, safe from the world.

But he isn't sweet, or nice, or kind. He didn't do this for you, despite what his twisted brain tells him. You can pretend all you want that he's something other than what he is, but it doesn't change what he is. A monster.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

“Where's my little princess?” Leon's asking as soon as he walks into the house, kicking his shoes off and hanging his jacket up at the door. You recently got free reign of the home for being on your best behaviour. Didn't even have to keep the leash attached to your collar anymore. Lucky you.

“Here, daddy.” You say meekly, poking your head out of the living room to approach him, fiddling awkwardly with the edge of your shirt. Head down, so he doesn't have to see the defeated expression on your face as you force out the words, swallowing thickly to hold back your tears.

“You have a good day, sweetheart? You do any coloring in those cute little books I got you?” Leon's hands come up to your cheeks, gently stroking his thumbs back and forth across your cheekbones. You shake your head, gritting your teeth to stop yourself from saying something.

“No? Why not, baby? You don't like them? I got the one with lots of kitties. Pretty girls like you like cute things, don't they?” He coos, squishing your cheeks in his hands to make your lips all pouty so he can lean down and give them a little kiss, letting out a loud ‘mwah’ as soon as his lips make contact.

“You eat at least? I left some food in a lunchbox for you.” You shake your head again, and this time it seems to elicit a worse reaction. His brows furrow, and his hand grips your face even tighter. “No? Silly baby… can't do anything without daddy, can you? Come on. Daddy'll feed you, cutie.”

He heats up some food for you and puts it on a plate. The pink, plastic princess plate. He sits you on his lap and feeds it to you from a fork. Pink, plastic fork. The routine is the same, no matter how much you wish for it to change. When you finish eating, he presses a tender kiss to your head and rocks you in his arms.

“Such a good girl. Good girls get rewarded, princess.” He murmurs, pressing soft kisses against the skin of your neck, trailing them up until he's nosing at the hair behind your ear. His hand slides up your thigh and under your skirt, his thumb swiping your swollen bud through the already damp fabric. It didn't matter if you didn't want it. Your body didn't seem to understand what was happening - all it knew was Leon made you feel good. You hated how compliant you got when he touched you, how any thoughts of defiance melted away.

You go limp when he touches you. Docile. You let him do what he wants to you, just like a good girl should. Back-talking daddy is a big no-no. He wrote that in big writing on the rule list that's pinned to the fridge. Escape didn't use to seem impossible, yet now the thought never even crossed your mind. You'd tried, but he kept a tight lock on you. You wouldn't be surprised to find out one of the many injections he gave you when you were unruly had a tracker in. He always seemed to know exactly where you were.

You whimper as he dips his hand under the waistband of your panties. He parts your puffy lips with practiced ease as he continues on with the next part of his routine. 98 days later and he's mapped every inch of your body perfectly - found out everything that has you keening under his touch. Your hips buck as he runs his fingertip between your folds, gathering slick before rubbing small circles into your clit.

“Poor, dumb baby. She's soaking me already. You couldn't make yourself feel good when daddy was gone, huh, sweetheart?” His words are followed up by a finger burying itself in your tight heat, curling to find that gummy spot that has you clenching around him and bucking your hips. “Pretty princess cunt's been drooling for me all day.”

A choked sob leaves you when he pulls his cock out and sits you on top of it. He pulls you down until he's buried to the hilt, groaning as you tighten around his length. He buries his face into the crook of your neck, peppering it with tiny little kisses. You can't help but cry whenever Leon fucks you. 98 days later and you still sob whenever he bullies your cervix with his dick. No matter how many times he makes you cum or makes you go dumb on his cock, it doesn't change anything. He took everything from you - your family, your friends, your job.

You hated yourself more than Leon. For letting him break your walls down. For clinging to him as he tightens his grip on your waist, manhandling you on his cock, lifting you up and down. For finding yourself missing him when he's at work.

“Love…love you, daddy…” Your words come out more like a cry, nose all runny and cheeks wet with tears as he fucks up into you, his head shifting to hang back in pleasure. His fingers dig into your waist as he hears the words, a breathy laugh leaving him as he smiles - all toothy and bright like it always is when you say that.

“Love you even more, princess.” He grunts out, leaning back on the seat to force himself deeper into your pussy, guiding your hips back and forth so you're grinding his cock inside of you, rubbing your pretty clit against his happy trail. You gasp at the sensation, your hands gripping into his shoulders as your brows furrow in pleasure.

“Daddy… daddy…” You gasp out as your orgasm hits, your lips parting as you gush all over him. The look on your face as you cum is enough to have his balls tighten, his teeth gritting as he starts to shallowly thrust into you once more, chasing his own release. You always cry when you cum, and Leon always kisses the tears away when you do, his lips pressing against the wetness on your cheeks repeatedly. Another part of the ritual, another moment repeating day after day.

“Want daddy to fill you up, sweet girl?” He grunts, nipping at your neck as he wraps his arms tight around your waist in a bear hug, holding you steady as he fucks up into your drippy cunt. “Gonna warm you up right in that cute lil’ tummy.”

His hips stutter as his orgasm hits him, his jaw going slack as he presses the tip of his cock right up against your cervix, filling you to the brim with his sticky cum. He slides a hand under your shirt, his thumb rubbing gentle circles into the skin of your tummy.

“That's it. Keep it all in, okay? Daddy doesn't want to see his little angel spill a single drop.” He says softly, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips. He holds you there for a couple of minutes, cradling you against his chest until it's time to go to sleep.

Before bed that night, Leon ushers you into the bathroom. Like every night before this one, he gently grips your jaw with one hand as he stands behind you, his other hand gripping your pink princess toothbrush as he brushes your teeth, his eyes locked onto you through the mirror. At bedtime, he tucks you in and curls up behind you, spooning you with one hand on one of your tits, and the other wrapped tightly around your waist.

Tomorrow is a Friday. He wakes you up at 6.30 am with a kiss to your head as always, a warm cup of milk in one hand and your breakfast in the other. He feeds you off of a pink, plastic princess plate and presses a kiss to your lips before leaving at 7.30 am on the dot.

[yoonia]

blooming wallflowers (m) | knj

⟶ Summary | Your life has been in shambles with only your two sweet girls keeping you strong enough to carry on. It has been a while since the flame of desire you once had within you dim into almost nothing, until the man who spends his life fighting against arson comes into your life (and your two little girls’) only to help light up that fire once again

⟶ Title | Blooming Wallflowers ⟶ Pairings | Kim Namjoon x older female reader  ⟶ Genre | Firefighter!Namjoon, Single mother!reader, Smut, Angst ⟶ Word count | 20,800 words ⟶ Ratings & Warnings | +18 / M for Mature; allusions of past/toxic relationships, healing, usage of alcohol and drinking, dealing with insecurities, age gap with older female reader (OC is in her mid-30s), trapped in confined spaces; contains explicit smut scenes, including: sexual tension, dirty talk, light restraint, soft dom!Namjoon, switching positions and roles (OC taking control at some point), clothed foreplay, grinding, dry humping, thigh riding, implied body worship, breasts play, fingering, clit play, pussy slapping, riding, grinding, semi-public sex (does dining room count?), pet names, groping, biting, edging, oral sex (female receiving), minor hand-job, panty ripping, clit biting, panty sniffing, praise kink, hair pulling, rough sex, protective sex, multiple orgasms, forced orgasm, overstimulation.  ⟶ Author’s Note | Written as a commission for @KimCheeHoo | I’m so sorry this took me forever to finish. Thank you so much for commissioning me and for your endless support. I hope you’ll enjoy this story. Have fun reading!  ⟶ Story Note 1 | Written in 2nd person POV (in case you’re new to my writing, I don’t use ‘y/n’ coding as all of my lead characters are considered as OCs). This story has POV switches, and this is roughly edited, so forgive me for any mistakes. Banner design made by me, age warning divider by @/cafekitsune | Posted in: September 25th, 2024 by @yoonia

⟶ Also written as part of the @bangtanwritershq “Got A Secret, Can You Keep It?” Third Quarter 2024 writing event! ⟡ AU type: Hold Me Tight - Dilf/Milf AU ⟡ Themes: Age Gap, Situationship ⟡ Inclusions: Edging, Fingering, Angst/Hurt, Restraints

⟶ Music companion | Blue Rain, Make You Mine ⟶ Main Masterlist | Mailbox | Taglist | Ko-fi | Commission  ⟶ Read on AO3 ⟶ Short story: Dinner with Mista Joonie

On some days, you would feel like you are finally getting your shit together. 

But today is not one of those days. 

“Mommy! Hana is trying to bite me!” You hear your oldest whine as she hugs the pancake batter box to her chest. Shaking your head, you can only guess that her sister has been trying to take that box away from her hands. 

“No, I did not!” Hana, your youngest daughter argues back, “Mommy, Suzy won’t let me use the scanning thingy.” 

Suzy narrows her eyes and scoffs. She has been doing this expression a lot lately. It took you weeks after you first saw her making such an expression to figure out that she had somehow gotten it from you. Hana’s new biting habit, however, is something that you have yet to figure out how and when it started. 

“You’re such a baby,” Suzy says, rolling her eyes, which only riles up her sister more.  

“I am not!” 

“Yes, you are. That’s why you can’t do this. Babies don’t do what grown-ups do.” 

Sullen, Hana props her hands on her hips and lifts her chin, as if it would make her look bigger against her sister while whining, “But you’re not a grown-up too!” 

Watching them go at each other, you cannot decide whether you want to laugh or cry. 

Hana’s attitude reminds you of someone. You, perhaps, no doubt as the only role model she currently has to copy some of that sassy attitude from. You probably should feel embarrassed—deep down, you do, you are somewhere in public, after all—as the girls continue fighting, their voices loud enough to draw some attention, with the addition of being super dramatic about it. 

Only for them to have a turn at helping you with the self-checkout counter. 

You know the reason why you cannot find it in you to be mad at them. Not when the girls are showing you that they are the perfect carbon copy of you—not that you are the kind to have a tantrum in the middle of the supermarket, at least not at this age—and when they are always full of surprises. And you cannot deny that they are so stinking cute. 

Suzy, the bigger one out of the two, is mostly quiet and sweet. As a six-year-old girl, only weeks away towards her seventh, she often makes people think that she is a bit older than she truly is with how calm she acts around others. Until recently, she has always been so shy. But that is only until the moment her little sister starts acting out and then she would react so strongly to her tantrum—just like what she is doing now. 

Hana, on the other hand, is more brave and confident, and a bit too smart for her own good. Always so curious and mischievous, and always loves to copy whatever her big sister is up to. And she is always so headstrong that nothing can stop her whenever she wants something. 

She just turned four, and you were sure that she could barely speak full sentences just a year ago. That period of time feels so long ago as you watch her arguing with her sister, with perfect sound of mind, clear words and reasonings, a sign that she is growing up a bit too soon. 

“Girls, please stop screaming at each other,” you try to calmly separate them. 

You have no idea what is happening. Normally, your girls would know perfectly well how to behave. They take great pride in being your ‘little helpers’ and it isn’t rare for you to bring them with you when you are out buying groceries. 

For some reason, they have been like this all day. Constantly arguing and making a fuss over everything. Even to the smallest things. 

“You can take turns using the scanner. Let Suzy finish scanning the pancake batter, then you can do yours, Hana. Here—” 

Reaching into the shopping cart, you grab the box of cookies that you don’t remember placing inside the cart and try to hand it over to Hana. Only for it to slip out of your hand when both Suzy and Hana try to reach for it. Both insisting on taking it and having their turn. 

“Motherfucker,” you mutter under your breath as the box slides on the floor, and both girls immediately launch into another series of arguments, blaming each other for dropping the box and getting you angry. 

Tears are pooling in the corner of your eyes, and the quick switch of your mood isn’t unnoticeable for your girls as they both grow still. As if they are expecting you to snap. You bite your lips, trying your best not to. 

Just as you take a deep breath to compose yourself, a shadow comes to your side, picking up the fallen box and handing it to you.

“Excuse me,” a deep voice speaks, snapping you out of it, only to pull you into a dreamy trance the moment you get a look at his face and see his smile. The dimple on his cheek distracts you from your distraught that your mind becomes numb for a moment. 

“Hi there, do you need any help?” 

“Uhm, not really. It’s fine,” you answer, barely getting a word out when it feels like your brain has short-circuited. You shake your head, noticing his extended hand, offering you the box that you dropped earlier. “Oh, thank you,” you say to him, smiling apologetically as you take the box from his hand. “I’m sorry, I’m not sure why my girls are acting like this. They’re not usually this dramatic.” 

“That’s okay. Kids will be kids, right?” His eyes flicker towards your girls. Suzy, still in shock, is standing right by the cart while clutching the box of pancake batter to her chest, while Hana is clinging to your leg, almost hiding. “I don’t think you remember me, but—” The kind stranger offers the same hand to you to shake as he introduces himself, “I’m Namjoon. I just moved in a couple of doors away.” 

Once the information sets in, everything clicks. “Oh, yes. That’s right. I do remember.” 

All of a sudden, your memory takes you to last weekend, when you joined a cookout event held by one of your neighbours. The gathering was initially meant to celebrate their 25th anniversary, and you recall how they extended the celebration to welcome the new neighbour arriving in your block. You were so tired that night and were so focused on watching your kids that everything seemed to flash by, but you do recall gossiping with one of your neighbours, Ella—the only other single mom of the group—about how hot and stunning the newcomer looked. 

Blinking away the memory, you offer him another smile. “I’m sorry, I think the stress got to me. But I do remember you, although I don’t think we had enough time to chat.” 

“It’s fine. I won’t blame you, given the circumstances,” he says, and that cute dimple appears again. He turns to your kids next, bending a bit lower to match their height. “Hi, there. Are you girls trying to help your mom with the checkout?” 

Suzy presses her lips together, too shy to speak, but Hana is always happy to offer an answer. “Suzy won’t let me help.” You look down to see her pouting her lips, yet her eyes are still wide, looking curious and intrigued by this friendly stranger. Once again, something that you might share with your girl. 

“Well, I haven’t checked out my things and I might need a little help. So why don’t we let your sister help your mom, and you help me with mine?” he offers Hana with a smile as he points at his shopping basket, which is barely half full. Any adult would notice that he wouldn’t be needing much help with them, but Hana immediately perks up at his generous offer. 

“Is that really okay with you?” you ask, worrying about troubling him when you barely know him at all and letting your daughter out of your sight. 

As if he knows what you are thinking, he points over his shoulder at the next counter, which is only recently vacant. “I’ll take the next counter, so you can see and hear us all the time.” 

A sigh of relief escapes you. For some reason, looking at him alone is enough to reassure you and make you trust him. Maybe it’s the dimple. “Right. Okay,” you say to him, nodding. “Go ahead, honey. Help the nice mister with his groceries. But promise me that you’ll be good.” 

“‘Kay!” Hana easily agrees, getting overly excited that she has been given something else to do. “I promise, Mommy.” 

Find the beauty in the chaos. 

You remember reading that sentence somewhere. Perhaps from one of your favourite romance novels or one of those self-help books that your mother bought you during your darkest time. 

Each time you are having a hard time, be it from work, from dealing with household chores, or from caring for your daughters, you will always remember those words to keep your composure. Just like how you kept repeating those same words moments ago while you were stressing over your kids, when you tried to remain calm and sane. 

You didn’t expect the beauty to come and find you in your chaos instead. 

Having someone helping you just when you are starting to lose your calm feels like a blessing from the universe. 

Once peace has been regained, everything seems to return back to normal. Almost as if your daughters’ tantrum and fight never happened. 

While you work together with Suzy, who is enjoying her role as your little assistant, her smile widening each time the items go through, you can hear the sound of soft giggling from nearby as Hana does the same with her new friend. 

And Namjoon, the kind stranger and your saviour of the day, is making it fun by playing a little game with your little girl using the scanner and his groceries, drawing smiles and laughter from Hana, her little drama earlier forgotten. Soon enough, they are done, yet Hana remains by Namjoon’s side, almost clinging to his strong arm as she chatters away while he listens closely, hanging to every word she says. 

It appears that your little girl has completely become infatuated with the man. You cannot blame her though, since the man is quite easy in the eye. You have even noticed some of the women passing by looking over, and it surprises you how quickly it is making you feel territorial about him. 

“Thank you so much for your help. I truly appreciate it.” 

And you mean every word, seeing that not only has he helped solve your little problem with your demanding daughters, he also stays long enough to walk you to your car. If that isn’t enough to make you feel as if you have been transferred into another dimension, he has somehow gotten your daughter lifted in one arm, while he carries his grocery bag in the other. 

“It’s nothing, really. I enjoyed talking to your sweet girl,” he says, once again showing his dimple, and you can swear that you are swooning just by the look of it. Perhaps it’s his voice that does it to you; the deep timbre that makes you feel warm inside. It might also be the way he glances at Hana, not even showing any sign that he is getting annoyed for having his evening thwarted by having to deal with little girls and their very disorganised mother. 

“I mean it. You could’ve just walked past and didn’t offer anything, but you still did. You’re even walking us out to the car.” You sigh, recalling the bitter memory of the drama earlier. Glancing at him, you realise that Hana has become extremely silent. “Please tell me Hana isn’t falling asleep on your shoulder.” 

Namjoon lets out a soft chuckle as he takes a peek at Hana’s face, her cheeks smushed against his broad shoulder as if she has found the perfect place to rest her head on. “I think she’s about to.” 

Biting your lips, you hold back the sound that almost comes involuntarily out of you, because you can almost hear your ovaries exploding. 

Namjoon helps put Hana into her kiddie seat in the backseat of the car while you strap Suzy in right beside her. “You seem like you’ve done this before,” you let it slip, and you quickly move your hand to cover your mouth. “I’m so sorry. You’ve been so nice and here I am, sounding too presumptuous.” 

“It’s okay. Most of my friends have kids, and I’ve helped them once or twice whenever I’m free. I also have a niece from my sister, which gave me a chance to practice.” 

You take a peek at his grocery bag and remember what you saw in it—a box of beer, a couple of boxes of microwave dinners, and some snacks—and feel the urge to cook him dinner. Just to pay him a favour. 

Yes, that’s what it is. Not that you are eager to have him over for dinner or invite him into your home for anything other than. 

The offer is there, hanging at the tip of your tongue. But then you bite your lips, your insecurities and doubts rearing their ugly head, making you feel so small that you take a step back and simply say, “Thank you again. I’m so sorry for all the trouble.” 

Namjoon shrugs it off. “It was a pleasure to help.” 

Nodding, you look around, trying to find a distraction. You quickly notice that most of the cars parked near yours have gone away. “Are you—where did you park your car?”

The dimple on his cheek appears again when he shows you a bashful smile. “I don’t drive a car, actually,” he says, grinning and rubbing the back of his head. “I rode a bike here.” 

“A—bike?” You resist the urge to look around, just to be sure. Riding a bike at this time at night? You have no idea whether to feel amazed or baffled. Perhaps both. 

Seeing your reaction makes him laugh, and you somehow decide that you like the sound of it. “Yeah, I always ride a bike to the gym, and I was just heading home from there when I decided to make a quick stop to grab some sustenance for the evening.” 

Hiking the grocery bag in his arm higher, Namjoon takes a step back. That is when you notice the bag hanging from his shoulder. The one that wasn’t weighed down by Hana’s little head. 

Okay, you have officially decided to be amazed. Is this guy for real? 

“Well, I guess I’ll see you around?” He asks, snapping you back to the present before your mind starts picturing him carrying something else on those shoulders. 

No, none of it involves you. 

Maybe. 

You shake your head and muster a smile. “Oh, you betcha. You’ll definitely see us more often. Especially now that Hana has decided to like you.” 

You linger at the driver’s side of your car, hands on the door, yet your body refuses to slide in. You have no idea what seems to be drawing you towards him. Whatever it is, it makes you not want to leave. 

Namjoon tilts his head, as if noticing your hesitation to leave first. “Go on, I’ll watch you until you’re out there safely.” 

You open your mouth, almost ready to tell him to get back on his way before realising that the parking lot is quiet. Too quiet. And you have to admit that ever since you were left with only your two girls, you have been feeling a bit more vulnerable. Choosing to accept his offer of staying until you are safe to go—and feeling warm in the chest for having someone care enough to do so—you nod your head and slip into your car. 

Once you are strapped in, you look out the window to wave him goodbye. 

“Drive safe,” he says, and then the dimple reappears when he smiles, almost causing you to stutter. 

“Yes, um. You too.” 

Hana’s eyes flutter open just as Namjoon takes a peek into the backseat window to say goodbye to the girls. 

“Bye, Mista Joonie!” she cheerfully shouts, as if she wasn’t falling asleep in his arm just moments ago.

“Goodbye, Mister,” Suzy chimes in with a shy smile, waving her hand at Namjoon which he returns with a small wave.

“I’ll see you girls around!” 

Giving him one last wave and a smile, you begin to drive away. You can still see him through the rearview mirror, standing by and watching you go, until you are almost out of the lot and you see his figure running in the distance to get back to his bike. It’s brief, but there is something about this chance encounter that makes you feel bitter about leaving. 

Even if, deep down, you know that you will see him again soon. 

Perhaps I should’ve offered and invited him for dinner, after all. 

There is truly no beauty in this chaos. 

Even if there is, it would be impossible for you to see it. Not in moments like this.

It seems like the entire universe is out to get you this week, as nothing seems to be aligning the way it should have. The whole office has been in complete havoc all morning. Typical for Blackwell Press, the publishing company you are working with, to have the final week of the month filled with all the hustle. With everyone getting caught in deadlines, meetings and conference calls held back to back, and your own work piling up, it almost seems impossible for things to get even worse. 

But, of course, it eventually did. 

Offices don’t randomly get caught on fire during the daytime, when there are people—many of them—inside. Elevators don’t randomly get stuck merely seconds after the fire alarm starts blaring across the building.

Okay, this elevator had gotten stuck before, during that one time some staff were working late at night and the machine suddenly failed to work. Everyone has been joking about it happening again during a busy day, and it feels like karma that it has to happen again now. 

But must it happen when you are inside it?

The steady hum of the elevator suddenly turned into a deafening silence just moments ago, and the only thing you can do now is to stand frozen in the flickering light, wondering what is going on. Trapped between floors, the confined space appears in your mind as if closing in on you, the walls shrinking with every breath. The only reprieve you are given is the fact that you are not in it on your own. 

Your heart is pounding in your chest, louder than the faint crackle of the intercom as Daniel, the Marketing guy, tries to contact the security staff downstairs through the intercom. His voice remains calm despite the constant crackling sound each time they try to respond, while the other Marketing staff present with you, Jae, has long discarded his suit in his effort to calm himself. 

You take shallow breaths to keep yourself from panicking, all while trying to listen to the soft hum of their voices as they talk about what to do, just to keep your mind from wandering towards dark places. Right beside you, Lily, the only member of the Editor team aside yourself, is slowly losing her calm. 

At the sudden halt of the elevator, she had reached out to grab the sleeve of your blouse as if searching for support. As seconds tick by, her grip on your sleeve tightens as she tries to control her breath, her eyes locked on the digital screen that is no longer displaying a floor number. And you let her cling to you, even when you feel like you need some added strength for yourself. 

It was by mere coincidence that the four of you are stuck here together. 

You were the last ones to leave the conference room after the latest meeting, having been the ones responsible for providing the items for the meeting. As fate has it, merely seconds after the doors were closed and the elevator had only started moving, the fire alarm started blaring through the building, and everything came to a halt. 

“They’re saying that help is on its way,” says Daniel, relaying the message that he just received from the intercom, his voice becomes the calm in this dire situation. 

You find yourself feeling grateful that at least one of you manages to hear the voice coming through the intercom, while you haven’t been able to focus on anything at all. Nothing but the sound of your breathing, the rapid sound of your heartbeat, and at the way the air seems to be growing stale with four people sharing the same oxygen in this tight space. 

“What did they say? Is it connected to the fire alarm?” you try to ask, hoping that getting some positive news might help clear your thoughts. Even if just a little. 

“No, they didn’t say anything,” Daniel says with a strained voice, possibly due to reality finally sinking in once the intercom stops making any sound to respond. 

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Jae leans back against the metal railing and sighs. “Let’s just hope that we’re not anywhere close to the fire, and it’s just some issues with the electricity,” he adds while trying his best to remain calm. But it doesn’t help make you feel any calmer when his eyes begin wandering at every visible gap and crevice as he speaks, as if making sure that he isn’t seeing any smoke filtering into the elevator. 

It makes you feel uneasy to see this. Every bit of calmness that you still have begins chipping away. 

Soon, silence falls as everyone tries their best to remain still and composed while waiting for help to come. The minutes drag on like hours, allowing your thoughts to wander into a darker place and letting your doubt and fear sink in. 

Is the building really burning? 

Why are we stuck here? How long are we supposed to wait?

What happens if help doesn’t come? 

What about my girls? What will happen to them if I—

You blink away the tears forming in your eyes at the thought of not returning home to your girls. The thought of leaving them behind hurts you beyond words that you are beginning to lose hope. 

Gripping the metal railing behind you tightly, you close your eyes and begin to pray. And you continue to pray as time slips away in the dim, stalled box. Please, you beg whoever is listening. Please, someone—

A loud clatter breaks the silence, causing everyone to jerk their heads up, all eyes looking around to find its source. Right as Jae is about to speak, the clattering stops and comes a muffled voice from somewhere above.

"Hello? Can you hear me?" The voice is clear now, firm but calming, and somewhat familiar. But your mind is a jumbled mess of worry and bewilderment that you cannot figure out the reason why you would think that way. 

"Yes!" Jae calls back after looking around, seeing how everyone is stunned to silence, “Yes, we can hear you!”

"Stay calm," the voice calmly instructs from above. “We’re from the firefighters. We're going to get you out."

You feel your knees weakening with relief. Even the others collectively exhale deep sighs of relief and Lily begins to loosen her hold on the sleeve of your blouse. “Okay,” she whispers, steadying herself. “We’re going to be okay.” 

Daniel nods when he sees that everyone is calmer. “Okay, we’re ready!” he shouts to the person on the other side as he braces against the cool metal wall. 

Soon, you hear a low, scraping sound against the elevator door, followed by the clank of tools echoing through the small chamber. The elevator shirts slightly upon impact, causing everyone to gasp and instinctively start stepping away from the door. Before panic starts to set back in, the firefighter’s voice cuts through again, calming everyone down.  

"We're going to manually open the doors. You might feel the elevator shift a little—don't worry. You're safe."

Safe. 

The word echoes through your mind, acting like a spell as it brings some reassurance. Something for you to cling to. The clanking sounds of the tool returns just as you start hearing the firefighter coordinating with his team outside. 

More creaks and groans follow next, lasting for a short while, and then—light appears. The doors start inching open, revealing the gap between the elevator floor and the hallway above. Two strong hands appear from the gap, pulling the doors wider until there is enough space for you to see your rescuers in their fire gear, all focused and ready to pull everyone out.

One firefighter peeks through the opened doors with a smile. “Alright, who’s up first?” 

Both men who are with you step aside, allowing either you or Lily to get out first. So you push Lily forward, letting her get helped first before you take your turn. 

"Alright, just one step up," the firefighter says, reaching down with an outstretched hand. "Take my hand, we’ve got you."

You hesitate only for a moment before grasping his hand, his hold feels solid and reassuring. You can feel the strength in his grip as he hoists you up and out of the elevator, the cool rush of fresh air hitting you like a wave of relief. Your legs tremble as they touch solid ground that you nearly fall, yet the kind firefighter holds you up by your arms, keeping you steady as he sets you aside so that the other members of his team can start helping the men out.

"You're okay now," the firefighter says, his voice softer now. "Just breathe. You’re safe."

Nodding, you close your eyes, allowing yourself to feel the weight of your fear melting away. Still unable to speak, you glance back at the elevator, seeing it still wedged between floors, and feel a shiver run through you as you remember that you had just been inside it moments ago. But as you look around, watching the firefighters handling the situation, helping the other three who had just gotten pulled out to get help, the terror that was gripping at you begins to loosen its hold. 

With a relieved sigh, you straighten up and turn back to your saviour, the firefighter who had just pulled you out and is still holding you up. The moment you see his face, you finally understand why his voice felt so familiar, and why you could easily find calmness when you first heard him speak. 

“Namjoon,” you whisper his name, drawing a smile to his face, showing you the small dimple which had been in your mind ever since the night you last met. 

“I told you we’d meet again soon.”  

“Is this really necessary?” 

You are sitting at the corner of the building’s main lobby, together with the other three who had gotten stuck with you in the elevator. Other staff have also been evacuated here while the firefighters are working to find the source of the problem. 

Namely, the reason why the fire alarm went off when there was no sign of the building burning anywhere. 

Right by your side, Jae is being checked by the medical team when it is quite obvious that all the man wants to do is to get back to his office. 

“You were under duress just moments ago, Sir. We need to check your vitals to make sure that there are no other issues with your body that the incident may have caused before letting you go.” 

“Let the boy do his job so we can all go back to the office,” Daniel chimes in just as he is done being checked out and the medic moves to Lily next. The poor girl has yet to regain some colour on her pale face, which makes you worried. “Wait, we’re allowed to go back to our office, right?” 

The medical staff nods and talks about waiting until everyone gets clearance from the investigation team before going back up. After getting your turn for the quick check-up, you wander off a bit between the staff lingering around, feeling too restless to sit still. 

Before you realise what you are doing, you begin searching for a familiar figure between the throng of people, and you don’t stop until you see a group of firefighters returning to the lobby after checking the floors above. One of them, who appears to be the team leader, walks towards the head of security and the Head Editor waiting close by. 

“It came from smoke forming in the break room. Someone must’ve burned something in the microwave or forgot to pull it out and the smoke triggered the alarm,” you hear the team leader speak, explaining the cause of the fire alarm. “The faulty alarm system made the electrical circuit go haywire, which made it seem like it was a bigger fire than it was, and it may have caused the elevator cables to short-circuit.” The team leader hands the draft of their investigation report to the head of security. “The elevator needs to get checked too, since the cables are old. You need to get it done soon.” 

The Head Editor—your boss—takes a peek at the report and shakes his head. “I’m gonna need to contact building management—” 

His voice begins to fade away when a movement catches your eyes, and you see the person that you have been searching for separating himself from the group to approach you.

Namjoon, who turns out to be your saviour, walks up to you with a smile on his face. “Are you okay?” he asks, the familiar deep timber of his voice brings some warmth to your chest, telling you that this isn’t a figment of your imagination.

“Yeah,” you answer with a small voice, still too dumbfounded to see him standing before you like this. “Uhm, yes, I’m fine. Thank you so much for saving my life.” The moment you say this, a soft giggle slips right out of you. “This makes it the second time this week you’ve come to my rescue.” 

Namjoon’s smile widens. “I’m just glad to help.” 

He takes a look around. “So, a publishing agency, hmm? What is it exactly that you do here, if I may ask?” His curious gaze lands on you and it feels like he is trying to look into your soul. “I hope it’s okay if I’m curious, since you now know what I do for a living.” 

You let out a nervous laugh. “I don’t mind at all,” you admit to him before answering, “I’m an editor. I edit manuscripts for upcoming books before they are sent out to print and get officially published. You can say that I’m being paid to read and comment, and gain the extra privilege of reading the books first before everyone else does.” 

“That sounds interesting,” he says, raising his brows. “I don’t suppose you’ll be getting back to work after this?” 

“I’m not entirely sure. But I don’t think I will.” You glance around at your co-workers. Neither seems to have any desire of going back to work after this whole incident. Sharing the same feeling with the others around you, you feel a strong desire of seeing your girls and spending time with them instead. “I might get back to my office only to pack up my stuff and leave early, pick up Hana from daycare and have a little cool down at the park before we go and pick up her sister. I know she’ll love it.” 

At the mention of your girls, Namjoon’s smile softens. “That sounds fun.” 

For a moment, it looks as if he wants to say something, only to stop himself when someone from his team calls his name. Namjoon looks over his shoulder and nods. “Unfortunately, one of us has to go back to work,” he says with an apologetic smile, “I’ll see you around. Hopefully, not in another case of emergency?” 

You cannot help but smile. “I promise to try and keep things less dramatic next time.” 

With a grin on his face, Namjoon turns away and joins the other men from his team as they prepare to leave. You watch him for a moment longer, blending in with the rest of them until someone comes to your side. 

“So—” Your friend, Emma, says as she slips her arm around yours. “Who’s the hunk?” 

You roll your eyes and smile. “He’s a new neighbour. He helped me the last time we met,” you answer, still stunned with everything that has been going on. You never expected that you would be seeing Namjoon again, and for him to once again save the day for you, “Which makes this the second time he’s helped me.”

“Oooh, sounds like a story premise in the making. It’ll make a good romance prompt, don’t you think?” she teases, “A firefighter who keeps crossing paths with a single mother, saving her during a series of misfortunes and ending up falling in love after the single mom starts paying his goodwill with homecooked meals and other”—she starts wiggling her eyebrows—”raunchy favours.” 

You laugh at her comment, even if it doesn’t stop you feeling your cheeks flushing warmly. “Well, I’m not the writer. You can probably pitch that idea to the indie author you’ve been working with.” 

“Who? Sana? Hmmm, you’re right. This is kind of her thing. Let me take notes on that,” Emma says as she pulls out her phone and starts tapping on the screen, no doubt writing the idea down on her notes app. “I might advice her to make it extra spicy too.” 

As you continue to chat with your friend about books and promising writers, you let her guide you back towards the Editor team who are gathering at one corner of the room with your boss, talking about the incidents and what they are going to do next. 

“Are you heading back up?” Emma asks you before you join the others, and you recall your plan about spending the rest of the afternoon with your youngest. 

“I’m thinking of grabbing my stuff and head back home if Adam lets us go for the day,” you say to her, referring to your boss, the Head Editor who isn’t showing any sign of wanting to back to work. Much like everyone else. “I’ll probably end up losing sleep again if I want to finish editing tonight.” 

You let out a sigh, thinking about the lack of sleep you have been having this week. With new books coming up to prints this month, and new writers struggling to keep up with the schedule that you have set up for them, you have been staying up a lot of nights to catch up with editing. 

“But it’s still a lot better to work from home than being stuck here and freaking out about the elevator and false fire alarms all day,” you add, almost like reassuring yourself that it would be okay to sacrifice more sleep for the sake of your sanity.  

“Good point. I bet we can sweet talk Adam to let us go early today. I don’t see the point in working when everyone is stressed out anyway,” Emma jokes as she points her chin at Adam, whose eyebrows are furrowed deeply as he continues chatting with his assistants. “At least, thanks to this, I think we deserve to let off some steam. What do you say we go out this Saturday? Grab some drinks, dance a bit, maybe you can practice your flirting skills so you can make use of them the next time you meet up with that cutie again.”  

You make a face as you imagine yourself trying to make a move on Namjoon, which only makes her laugh. “I’m serious. He seems nice, aside from being hot, and it’ll be a missed opportunity not to tap that.” 

You roll your eyes, but a part of you is starting to consider it. As much as you love being a mother and to dedicate your entire life to your career, you cannot deny that you do want to start dating again. 

And the offer to have a night out where you can let off some steam and let loose does sound enticing. Emma and some of your other friends have been asking you to join them to hangout on drink nights lately. But with a lot of deadlines and tight schedules weighing down on you, and no one to watch your girls while you are out, you have been declining their invitation. But after dealing with such a hard week, you feel like you deserve a night to yourself. 

“I do need a stiff drink.” Sighing, you remember that your daughters are going to be spending the weekends with your parents. It wouldn’t hurt to use that free time to have some fun for a change instead of staying in. “All right. Count me in.” 

Emma cheers. “Great! I’ll call the other girls to see if they’ll come too it so we can all catch up. Chloe called the other day and shared about wanting to see us and give us the souvenirs she got from her trip to Singapore last week, so she’ll probably be excited too,” she says, mentioning another fellow Editor who used to work in the same company as the two of you before moving up to a bigger publishing agency. 

Just then, you see a small group of firefighters walking across the lobby, heading towards the front door to leave. Among them is Namjoon, who seems to feel your gaze on him. As you continue watching him walk alongside his team, he suddenly turns. His eyes quickly find you among the crowd lingering in the lobby, his smile growing wider as he raises his hand to wave goodbye. 

Emma makes a humming sound when she sees this exchange happening and whispers, “Promise me you’ll tell me more about that hot firefighter of yours.” 

Keeping your eyes on Namjoon, you merely smile and wave your hand back at him. “Mhmm. We’ll see.” 

It’s a typical Saturday night at Cipher, the rustic-style bar that Namjoon has frequented ever since he moved into the city. 

The bar had a different name just a couple of years ago, when Namjoon first came by during one of his previous visits to this city, and with different types of patrons as well. The only thing that remains the same since is the man who is working behind the bar, mixing drinks while chatting with whoever decides to hang around the bartender. 

“How is living in the city going for you so far?” Jin, the bartender and owner of the bar, asks Namjoon while he is busy wiping clean glasses between drink orders. 

Twisting the glass in his hand, Namjoon shrugs before taking a sip of his whiskey. “Not too bad. I can’t say that I’ve gotten to fit right in with the neighbours. But things are doing good at work, so that’s good enough for now.” 

“Seeing anyone already?” Jin teases, making Namjoon laugh. 

“Are you seriously asking me that?” He shakes his head. “It might be too soon for me to get back out there into the dating scene.” 

“You? Not sure about getting out to meet up with women?” Jin laughs. “Look, I’m not talking about getting into a relationship or finding someone else to propose. I’m talking about having fun. Go pick someone you find attractive tonight and take her home with you. You deserve a good time too, you know.” 

Namjoon’s throat feels tight just by hearing that word—propose—only because it brings back a painful memory; of the days filled with fights and shouting matches and distrust, and the desperation he felt to hold on to the hope that things would have gotten better if he chose to settle down. 

Shaking the sudden wave of painful memory doesn’t really help when he thinks about opening himself to finding instant pleasure to replace what was lost to him.  

Namjoon may not be a stranger to having a one-night stand. But it has been a while since the last time he had one. Those days are way behind him. Long before he decided to settle down, only to have everything fall apart and he was forced to start over in a new place just to survive. 

He knows all too well that sharing his bed with someone for one night only does little to fill the void. He knows from what he experienced during his wild days in the past. Physically, he might not have been alone for those short hours, but once it ended, it only made him feel even more lonely than before. At some point, the loneliness started to feel painful. It was what had first led him to start longing for something more. 

He once thought that he had found more. Only that it had been with the wrong person, at the wrong time, and he found himself back to square one when everything crumbled. 

He took it all thinking that it might have been karma. Bad fate came to bite him on the ass after all the years he had his fun chasing women, breaking hearts here and there, until he got his own heart broken to pieces just months ago. 

It was the reality check he needed. One that he has yet to completely recover from. The pain and the memories of the past would sometimes come creeping in, staying with him as if they had been woven into the cracks that were left inside him to remain even after he walked away. It kept chasing him during the nights he spent alone—and he had tried to go back to the game once or twice, only to fail to gain anything out of it—which was why he decided to move away. 

Start anew. Meet new people. And then one day, maybe—

He knows that time will eventually help him heal, just like how time has healed many of the scars he had gained through the years of working with danger, chasing fires and pulling people out of crumbling buildings and crashed cars and stuck elevators—a flutter of a smile comes to his face as he recalls the most recent incident—while risking his own body, his life, doing so. 

“I can’t believe I’m getting an advice about hooking up from someone like you,” Namjoon chuckles, as he brushes those thoughts away, choosing to tease Jin instead. “Someone who claims to be looking into settling down.” 

Jin scoffs. “I’m saying this for your own good.” Propping his elbows on top of the bar counter, Jin leans forward. “You moved here to start over. Not to stop living altogether.” 

Namjoon gives him a bitter smile. “Right now, I’m only going to spend the night nursing my drink, enjoying my downtime while I’m off duty.” 

Shaking his head, Jin leans back and grabs the empty glasses left behind from the patrons who had just stepped away from the seats next to Namjoon. “Have you thought about my offer?” Jin asks, “About working here on the nights you’re not on night shift? At least, that way, you might open up your eyes and see all the opportunities you can get by standing right here at the bar, talking to people.” 

“And live a double life like you do?” Namjoon teases him, which earns him a wink from Jin, before the bartender saunters away as another customer waves him down to order a drink. 

Once again left with his own thoughts, Namjoon allows himself to sink back into old memories; all the good and the bad; the long-lost hope that he once had and is now trying to rebuild. 

“Wanna have another?” Jin asks when he returns, noticing that Namjoon has almost emptied his glass yet again. “Got enough time to think about what I was saying?” 

“Maybe,” Namjoon says as he tosses his drink down. He slides the empty glass back to Jin. “Get me a double of that.” 

As Jin steps back to grab his drinks, Namjoon notices the group of patrons crowding nearby spreading away, giving him a clear sight of the bar’s entrance door just as a group of women enters, laughing and chatting with each other without realising the attention they are gaining. All of a sudden, Namjoon feels as if the air around him shifts, right the moment his eyes capture the sight of a familiar smile among the ladies who seem to have come for a good time. 

“Can I ask you something?” Namjoon asks Jin when the bartender returns with his drink. 

“Sure. Anything.” 

“Do you believe in fate?” 

Jin laughs. “Me? I can’t really say I don’t believe it, but it’s also not something I’d talk about while tending the bar. Why?” 

Namjoon turns back to look at the group of newcomers, his smile growing wider when his eyes meet yours as you look up, as if you can feel his presence as he sits across the room, watching you with a new feeling of hope brewing inside his chest. Life can be cruel sometimes, he silently admits. Yet it seems that life is slowly turning to his favour when you unexpectedly appear right before his eyes, right when he is about to call it a night and return to his lonely home. 

“Well, I think I am starting to believe it.” 

“I feel like we should make a toast,” Emma starts once you manage to find an open table. She holds up her glass of Cosmo before anyone can start enjoying their drinks. 

“What are we toasting for?” Ina asks, just as Emma shouts, 

“To friendship.” 

Chloe snorts into her drink and shakes her head. “What are we, in high school?” 

“Hey, I mean, it works,” Emma whines, “Seeing that we still hang out together even after you and Ina moved to different companies.” 

Thinking to yourself, you think about the long week that you just had and offer, “How about a toast to surviving life?” 

“I’ll toast to that,” Ina quickly agrees with a nod, and you can totally understand why. Being the oldest one of the group, she has a ton of things on her plate among her busy days at work; from dealing with her teenage boys back home who are beginning to act up; a husband who is busy preparing for his promotion; and a sick cat back home. 

“I love my boys, but sometimes I wish they were still the same adorable toddlers who would listen to me instead of fighting me all the time,” she would often say, though you could always see the love in her eyes even as she complains about them. “Are you sure you don’t want to trade them with your girls? Just a night will be enough for me. I promise.” 

Chloe raises her glass to join the toast, saying, “I’ll toast to that too. These past few weeks have been pretty crazy for me. I want to stay in bed with my hubby for the next few weeks and not answer any texts or phone calls.” 

Her comment makes you want to take a shot of your drink. You shouldn’t feel envious about her having someone waiting for her back home. You shouldn’t wish that you had someone to share your bed with tonight. You really don’t need to think about having to return home tonight alone, to a quiet home, without your girls waiting back home, without anyone keeping you company.  

The only thing you fear the most about being left alone with your thoughts is to have the ghosts of your past coming back. Memories always come stronger at nights. Taking you back to the days when you were not alone, yet you are made struggling even harder than you are now when you tried to hold on to the crumbling marriage. 

Nobody warned you that falling out of love can be painful. How lonely it made you feel.  It scorned you to the point that you nearly sworn yourself off of love, just to keep your heart save. Whatever was left of it. 

“Then why are you here hanging with us when you have a husband to cuddle with?” Emma teases, her voice snapping you out of it. Then Chloe leans in to hug you from the side. 

“Because I also miss you guys,” she says, drawing everyone’s laughter. 

You share a toast with the girls, clinking the glasses as you cheer, followed by a series of shots, and then a new round of drinks is shared at the table. You continue talking, laughing, catching up about life and sharing gossip and fussing over some problematic authors that both Emma and Chloe had to deal with for the past month. By the time the next round of shots arrives at the table, you notice Emma’s eyes looking over your shoulder and grinning at what she sees.

“Aren’t you going to say hi?” she teases, leaning in to make it less obvious that she has been observing the one person that you have been fighting not to look at. 

You take a careful sip of your Moscow Mule as you think of an excuse. “We already waved at each other when we first came in.” 

Truth be told, you already know that a simple wave was the bare minimum that you could have given him. Seeing Namjoon sitting there at the bar when you first came into this place caught you by surprise that you were left speechless. It was Namjoon who had first smiled at you, and the only thing you could do was wave your hand at him when your legs refused to take you to him.  

“You know that’s not enough.” Emma rolls her eyes. “The guy practically saved your life.” 

Your reaction—or lack thereof—over seeing Namjoon hadn’t gone unnoticed by your friends. But it was Emma who had explained to the others about who Namjoon was, earning you more questions and teasing from the girls which only made it even harder for you to ignore his presence. 

“I’m sure he’ll appreciate it if you offer something special tonight for a thank-you gift,” Chloe teases while wiggling her brows. 

You laugh, snorting into your drink. “Sure he will,” you say, as you find it hard to imagine that someone like Namjoon would even be interested in being with someone like you. Not only because you know that he is younger than you, but you also know that there are many women out there—mostly those around his age—that he would find more attractive, compared to a single mom like yourself. 

As always, your insecurities are quick to set in. Before you can drown it with a strong drink, Emma quickly protests, “You’re a MILF, ______. Stop selling yourself short.”

Nodding, Ina gently agrees with her by saying, “You definitely shouldn’t, seeing that he keeps glancing at you.” 

“She means to say that he’s been eye-fucking you since we got here,” Chloe adds, snickering as she glances over her shoulder to catch Namjoon looking over. 

“He so is!” Ina says, leaning across the table. “He’s hot. Go for it.”

Hearing this, you finally take a long sip of your drink, trying to gain some liquid courage. You have only gotten a few glasses of drink, the night has yet grown late, but you have already gotten quite a good buzz going on, and you are using it to grow some courage to look over at him. Sure enough, Namjoon is still there, with a glass of what seems to be whiskey in his hand, and a pair of eyes that are looking straight at you. A smile grows on his face as your gazes meet each other, though it is quickly hidden as he lifts his glass to his lips. 

“See? He’s looking over again.” Emma starts giggling and gently nudges at your shoulder. “Go talk to him and practice that flirting skills of yours.”

“What flirting skills?” you ask while laughing. Deep down, your insecurities are still clawing at you, but having everyone pushing you to do something that you normally wouldn’t do—like flirting with a hot younger guy like Namjoon—is starting to make you want to change your mind. “Okay, but what do I say?” 

“You can start by saying hi,” Ina says. She pushes her appletini in front of you. “Here,” she says. “Finish this, then go talk to him before someone else moves in on that fine piece of ass.”

Chloe nods her head as you pick up the glass of appletini and contemplate what you need to do next. “You can go to the bar and act like you’re there to order drinks from the bartender since we’ll be needing some more drinks.” 

 “Go on,” Emma joins in, obviously enjoying this. 

You exhale a deep breath and bring the glass to your lips. The sweet liquor glides down your throat and you suddenly start wishing that you had gotten something stronger. Lowering the drink, you turn to look for him again. Namjoon isn’t looking at you this time, yet he is still there, talking to the pretty-looking bartender who was the main reason why Emma had chosen to come to this bar—as she seems to be having a sweet crush on the bartender. 

“All right, here I go,” you say, as you finish the drink and muster the will to rise from your seat. Your legs are a bit wobbly when you try to walk across the room, but the muted voices of your friends who are cheering for you from behind give you the boost you need to continue going. 

The floor between your table and the bar has been filled with people dancing while you are drinking, and they come in your way, making you lose sight of Namjoon for a moment. Not being able to see him only makes you feel calmer, until the crowd opens up and you see him once again, still sitting at the bar. Alone. 

Eyes too focused on him, you accidentally bump into someone who walks right into your path. “Oh, I’m sorry,” you immediately apologise while the person simply slides out of your way and returns to his dancing. 

You hear a soft chuckle, a familiar sound that causes your breath to catch. You whip around and your eyes are locked with his. Immediately, something fuzzy builds in your chest, and you almost fall out of step when you notice it. 

Are those butterflies you are feeling inside? You haven’t felt anything remotely like butterflies in—fuck—years. 

As his smile grows wider at the sight of you walking towards him, you try to convince yourself that his presence isn’t affecting you. At all. 

Your lady bits do not quiver for random men. You are certainly not having dirty thoughts about him. You keep telling yourself this as you get closer to him. And yet—

Your heart immediately speeds up at the sound of his voice—calling your name. 

“_______, fancy seeing you here,” he says, looking genuinely pleased that those butterfly wings are beginning to flutter again, causing some funny feelings to rise in your stomach. 

“I could say the same thing. It was a nice surprise to see you,” you respond to him and—fuck, did you really just try flirting with him? “Enjoying your night?” 

“You can say that,” he says with a dimple smile of his, “But I’m finding more reasons to feel good tonight now that you’re here.” 

Damn, he’s good, you wonder as you stifle a smile, and fail. Maybe he should be the one helping you sharpen your flirting skills instead of Emma or the other girls who always start making jokes about it and making you laugh each time you try it on them. 

“A friend of yours?” You turn when the bartender comes, throwing you a smile as he speaks to Namjoon. 

“Jin, this is _______,” Namjoon says, introducing the two of you. “This is Jin, an old friend who first convinced me to move here. He’s the main reason why I hang out at a place like this.” 

You offer your hand to the bartender who takes it with a firm grip. “Hi, it’s nice to see you. I see that you and your friends are having quite a blast.” 

Returning Jin’s smile, you playfully ask him, “Would it be too much if I thank you for encouraging Namjoon to move here?” 

“Nope, not at all,” Jin laughs. “So, what can I get you?” 

You quickly make your order, and while you wait for the bartender to finish preparing the drinks, you take the seat right by Namjoon’s side so you can have a little chat. Either the alcohol is starting to warm you up inside, or Namjoon’s friendly smile is making you more comfortable, every bit of tension you feel is lifted when you begin laughing at his simple jokes. 

Once the drinks are ready, you reluctantly rise to return to your friends to deliver their shots. This time, you have a slight new pep in your footsteps, confidence brewing inside you after realising that you had conquered one of your insecurities tonight by chatting with Namjoon. Your friends welcome you with light cheers, and you celebrate by sharing a shot of whiskey and finishing the rest of your drink. 

It doesn’t take long before your friends decide to end the night. 

Ina is the one to step away first, when her husband calls her about one of their sons who had just gotten caught sneaking through the window after lying about doing his homework in his room. “We don’t know if he snuck out to see a girl or got himself in other kinds of trouble while he was out, but Dan needs me as a backup to get some answers from the little brat,” she says, kissing your cheek when she bids goodbye for the night. 

Chloe is the one who needs to go home next, when her husband keeps calling her about feeling lonely at home. “I can’t tell if it’s sad or cute, but I think I’ve had enough to drink for the night. I already got an Uber picking me up outside.” 

“Are you coming?” Emma asks you, her eyes looking over towards the bar before asking, “Or are you going to stay?” 

You follow her gaze, looking at Namjoon chuckling along with whatever the bartender is saying to him. A part of you is telling you to call it a night, but there is a bigger part of you that feels intrigued, and curious to see what would happen tonight if you choose differently. To be selfish for once. 

“I think I’m going to stay.” 

Your answer brings a smile to Emma’s face. She seems proud and—relieved. You have no idea why she would feel this way over your decision to stay for a man, but she simply nods and says, “All right, then I’ll ride with you, Chloe. I’ll see you on Monday, girl,” she says to you as she leans in for a hug and whispers, “Go get him.” 

You watch your friends go before finishing the rest of your drink and leaving your seat. Before you can change your mind, your legs take you towards the bar, returning to Namjoon’s side as if you are drawn to him like a moth to flame. 

“Are you calling it a night too?” Namjoon asks you when he notices you coming, his gaze flickering to follow your friends as they weave through the crowd to find the exit door, as if expecting to see you following them.  

“I don’t really want to go home yet.” You bite your lips. “I think I’m going to have another drink before leaving. Are you planning on leaving early?” 

The smile that grows on Namjoon’s face makes your heart flutter. He does look good when he smiles. “And waste the chance to drink with you? No way.” You take the empty seat that he offers right next to him, which he gently pulls closer once you are settled in. “Let me order for you. What are you having?”

“Surprise me.” 

Smiling, Namjoon orders you a Moscow Mule, causing you to raise your brows. “You ordered the same drink twice while you were here.” 

“You have quite a good memory,“ you tease him, “Are you sure you don’t work here?” 

Namjoon laughs. His eyes glimmer under the dim lighting when he says, “You’re not the kind of woman that I’d be so easy to forget.”

You can barely hold back from laughing, because you cannot find it in you to agree. 

“You don’t believe me when I say that you’re not easy to forget?” he asks, moving closer to you until you can breathe in the musky cologne he is wearing. 

“Me? I’m nothing special. I’m just”—you breathe out a sigh—”just me.”

He takes your hand, sliding his fingers to your wrist, his thumb finding your pulse where he rubs in circles. “I don’t know you very well—yet—but from what I’ve seen, ‘just you’ seems pretty damn special.”

You laugh again and take a drink, murmuring softly to him, “Thanks.”

He looks down for a moment, as if considering what to say. But he seems more determined when he lifts his gaze and looks back at you. There is something in his eyes which draws out the flutters in your chest. A new look which you have yet to see coming from him during the short time you’ve known him. 

The look which shows a different kind of want.

And you can only guess what he is thinking right now. Biting your lips, you wait until he says the words, because there is nothing that you want more right now but to go with him. You enjoy talking to him, to be in his presence, and you have a feeling that you might enjoy it more if he offers something more. 

It’s just one night, so you can possibly handle it. Right? 

Fuck. All of a sudden, you don’t feel too sure about it. 

But the gentle touch of his fingers on your skin, together with the deep timber of his voice when he hums, is slowly enticing you to open up, to give in to chance. 

Namjoon’s eyes meet yours and the same dimple smile of his returns. You swallow hard, ignoring the sound of your pounding heart as he asks,

“Do you want to get out of here?” 

Biting your lips, you can feel your chest tightening. Your heart beating fast. Hard. Your body moves to lean closer even without you meaning it to. 

“Yes,” you whisper, and his face lights up, as if he was almost sure that you were going to refuse. 

“Your place, or mine?”

A simple question, made with a light tone of voice that sounds almost joking, except that Namjoon’s heart is beating rapidly inside his chest as he says it. He already risked everything when he first asked to take you away from here. Now, it feels as if he is risking a bit more as he waits for your answer. 

You bite your lips, and your hesitance only makes him feel worse. “Is there any difference?” 

Namjoon wants to say, no, it doesn’t. The only thing that matters is for him to be spending this night with you. You push your hair back, and when your eyes meet his, he can almost feel your heart beating right up against his. 

“Are your kids home tonight?” Namjoon tries when you’re not too sure. Somehow, he understands that you might be wary about coming home to his place when you barely know him. 

“No, they’re at my parents.” 

A smile is lifted on his face. “Then are you going to take me home?” 

You return his smile and lean closer. It amazes him how quickly you switch—from shy and hesitant at one point, to feeling more confident and daring the next. And it turns him on even more when you say, “Only if you promise that you’re going to be a good boy.” 

Namjoon calls an Uber to take you both home while you make a quick stop at the restroom before leaving the place. In the short time that he has to wait for you, Namjoon struggles to keep his composure. It’s almost laughable the way it makes him feel like a newbie. For him to feel so nervous as if he is inexperienced in this. 

In a way, this is something new for him. Enough to make him feel exhilarated about what is to come. 

He turns just in time to see you walking up to him. As if your moment away had given you the chance to recoup and find some resolve, you look as if you are shining, your smile looking bright and your eyes filled with lust and want and it takes everything in him not to pull you into his arms here and now just to kiss you senseless. 

“Take me home, mama,” he jokingly says when he opens the car door for you, making you laugh. 

Instead of answering him, you grab the front of his shirt and pull him in with you until you are seated in the backseat of the car together, bringing the heat that you share into the confines of the car as it takes you back home. 

In the tight space within the car, the heat that has been building up between you becomes more palpable. You can tell that he is feeling it too. And he seems to be giving into it, when he keeps running the tips of his fingers from your hand to your wrist, when his knees keep pressing against yours, and when his eyes keep trailing from your face, down to your cleavage, and then back up to your neck, before lingering on your lips. 

He wets his lips, as if he is picturing himself tasting you with a kiss. “Can I be honest with you?” he whispers, leaning closer. 

“Of course.” 

“I…couldn’t stop thinking about you,” he admits with a soft chuckle. It seems that his confession surprises him just as much as it does to you. 

“Since the fire alert?” 

“No,” he says with a grin, “ever since the night we first met.” 

Was it at the supermarket? You wonder to yourself, trying to figure out what he could have possibly seen in you that night through the chaos with your girls. 

No, it was before, you begin to realise, as you recall the night of the cookout event at your neighbours’ backyard, when Namjoon lingered close by after sharing a quick chat with you, and when you caught him watching you from the side while you were helping your daughters with their dinner plates. 

“I told myself after watching you go that night that I shouldn’t get my hopes up, since you seemed to have a lot going on already and I probably didn’t deserve any second of your time. But then I saw you at the supermarket and I couldn’t resist saying hello.” His eyes find yours. You have no idea what kind of expression you are giving him while you are loss for words, but Namjoon’s smile softens. “And just when I thought it couldn’t have been more than a coincidence, we got the call to your office and there you were. It feels like we just keep crossing paths with each other. As if I am made to make a move.” 

Noticing that you have grown silent, Namjoon tilts his head and asks, “What’s wrong?” 

With a bitter laugh, you can only shake your head. “Nothing, it’s just—” You bite your lips, hating the way your insecurities have always been able to come to the surface the moment you try to push against your boundaries, when you try to take risks like what you are doing tonight. But you simply cannot help it. The feeling is clawing at your chest that you can barely breathe. “You know you could’ve gotten home with someone else. Someone who isn’t—” 

You try to look away, yet Namjoon isn’t having it. With his fingers on your chin, he turns your face gently so you are forced to look at him again. “Is not—what?” 

Your throat feels tight and your mouth feels bitter when you answer, “Older. A single mom. A—” 

Namjoon presses his thumb on your lips to stop you from speaking further. “Remember what I told you earlier, and I really meant it,” he says, his gaze softening and heating up at the same time. “You are special. If you had said no to me tonight, I would’ve gone home alone, and spent the rest of the night finishing the last cans of beer I still have in my fridge or eating any frozen leftovers I could find before passing out on the couch.” 

You blink. His honesty surprises you, yet you would be lying if you told yourself that it doesn’t make you feel flattered to hear him choosing you. 

As if there is a switch inside you that has been flipped, everything fades to the back of your mind. All the voices that keep putting you down are silenced. The only thing left in your mind is the image of this gorgeous man spending his night alone in his quiet home, eating one of those boxed meals you saw peeking through his grocery bag and downing beers until he falls asleep, and you decide that you are not having it. 

Seems like you are not the only one who needs to take some risks tonight just to experience some changes in life. 

“Yep. That’s it. I’m sending you dinner next time.” 

Namjoon laughs. “What—?” 

Wrapping your arms around his shoulders, you pull him down to you and press your lips on his, putting his words—and your thoughts—to silence with a kiss. 

“I’m sorry for the mess. The perks of having little kids are always having too many things scattered around the house, and—” 

It is still surprising to see how easy and quickly you change depending on the moment. You keep going from Miss In Control to a more subdued figure filled with insecurities. Namjoon knows that he shouldn’t, but he is adamant about changing that tonight, even if it makes him feel a myriad of things inside when you show multiple sides of you at once. 

“It’s all right,” he cuts you off with a half smile, noticing how nervous you are getting about showing him your home. 

As you move aside to start taking off your shoes and coat, Namjoon kicks his own shoes off and takes a quick glance around. Most of the lights are off, yet he can still see through the dim lighting to see what he needs to see. 

Much like his own house, your place has an open space concept, where everything is visible from the foyer. He looks at the living room to his right, where the flat television hangs against the wall, surrounded by wooden shelves filled with books and trinkets and boxes filled with toys. To his left is the open kitchen, the room is slightly more spacious than his, and cleaner, with a hint of the scent coming from the last meal you cooked today still wafting through the air. 

Truth be told, he doesn’t mind at all about how the house looks like at the moment. He even thinks that your home feels comfy, more welcoming and lively than his own, which makes him feel good and warm inside as he steps onto the threshold of your home. 

Still, right now, he has other—more important—things to pay close attention to.  

Namjoon waits until you are done taking your coat off before approaching you. 

He places an arm around your shoulders, hinting at his need to get closer. When you show no sign of pushing him away, he pulls you towards him gently, and you willingly lean into him until you are engulfed completely in his warmth, and he feels your soft body pressing against his hard muscles. He bends down and your lips meet each other, warm and welcoming as they mesh into a kiss. 

For a split second, Namjoon can feel you hesitating. But then your arms come up to wrap around him before returning the kiss. It feels gentle and soft, yet Namjoon can feel every cell in his body lighting up at the touch, and he allows that hope he ignored before to rise as he melts into the kiss

Namjoon is a firm believer that a person can tell quite a lot about the other by the way they kiss, and that the first kiss will define how the night will continue. 

He feels you parting your lips slowly as your fingers curl into fists, balling the back of his shirt. He can taste the fruity taste of your lip-gloss which you put on during your toilet break before the two of you left the bar, and he can also taste a hint of the drink you had as he lightly brushes the tip of his tongue against yours. 

The simple contact earns a soft hum from your throat, and then you tip your head back and open your mouth, asking him for more. He gladly gives it to you as he slides one hand up your waist and cups your cheek, deepening the kiss. Your grip around him tightens when his tongue pushes past your lips, bringing heat all over your body and his as he devours your mouth, and you respond by pressing your hips into his. 

Feeling like he is burning from within, Namjoon starts to pull away. But you are not having it. You move your hand to his face, and then bring him back down until his lips are back on yours. You take charge this time, kissing him as if your very existence depends on it, and Namjoon smiles into the kiss as he follows your lead.  

Tonight is going to be a good night.

As your mind grows hazy from the heated kiss, you start stumbling back until you are pressed against the front door. 

It rattles under your weight, and starts making other noises when Namjoon presses harder against you the deeper the kiss you share. You feel his feet moving, sliding between your legs, only to stop when his toes come in contact with one of Hana’s squeaky toys that had somehow fallen in the foyer. 

You break away from the kiss at the sound of his deep chuckle. The way he seems more amused than he is annoyed pleases you so that your body grows impossibly hotter. How can something so simple as a guy chuckling over a simple kid toy, completely understanding it instead of getting angry and complaining over something so trivial—just like someone you once knew and wish so badly to forget—look so incredibly hot? 

Expecting to hear him say something about it, you lift your face to look at him, only for Namjoon to bend lower again and try to kiss your lips. Bunching his shirt with your fingers, you stop him and start pushing him through the dark hall and into the kitchen, where you know there won’t be any trail of toys getting in the way. 

Namjoon lets you drag him around with a grin on his face. It seems to please him that you are the one taking the initiative, showing him that you want him just as much as he does. 

As you push him deeper into the kitchen, your hands tracing his hard chest and your lips nipping his jawline, you wonder where all of this confidence is coming from. 

It could be coming from the buzz rushing through your mind and body. It could also be this want inside you which has been lying dormant for so long, awakened simply by the heat of his kiss. Either way, you are surprised to find how easy it is to simply give in. To follow what your heart desires as if it is guiding you through the motions. 

While most of the lights have been turned off when you left your house earlier, the light from the microwave is on, casting a soft, golden glow which falls nicely on him, accentuating every line—both on his face and his body—which you desire so badly to touch and kiss and taste. 

You pull him down for that desirable kiss, and he dives straight down, his lips crashing into yours. And then he starts kissing you fast, hard, as if his very existence depends on this kiss. You kiss him back with the same need, taking his lip between your teeth, drawing a soft sound coming out of his throat. His chest rumbles against yours as he gently pushes you backwards. 

Namjoon pins you against the kitchen counter, placing you between the hard counter and his rock-hard chest. He moves his knees between your legs, keeping them apart. You can feel his cock straining against his jeans as he bucks his hips forward, pressing roughly into your stomach. Then he moves his mouth to your neck, kissing, sucking, making you moan, distracting you from the object of his desire that you want so badly to touch.

Without unlatching his lips from your skin, Namjoon sweeps his fingers across your collarbone, finding the strap from your top that is already hanging off your shoulder. He pulls away, his dark gaze following his fingers as he unhooks the other strap off your shoulder until your top falls down to your waist, exposing your lacy dark purple bra which you had intentionally chosen for the night. 

He watches closely as your chest rises and falls with your ragged breath, murmuring softly, “Beautiful. You are so hot, baby.”

Your entire body shudders with the sound of his deep voice, recognising the hunger in it. Heat forms in your belly after knowing that his words are meant for you. He slowly walks his palms up your body, reaching up to cup your breasts with his strong palms. 

A moan slips out of your lips at his touch, when the gentle pressure he is giving on your mounds sends heated sparks through your body. The sound you are making seems to snap something in him, as he moves his mouth back to yours, kissing you softly, teasing, while his thumbs begin to move over your covered nipples in small circles. 

You draw a sharp inhale of breath at the delightful sensation he is making you feel, which is swallowed by his kiss. Your chest rises, pressing your breasts into his palms. The shiver running through your body feels so intense, blocking everything else as you push your tongue back into his mouth at the same time your hands slip under his shirt. 

His skin feels warm. His chest feels firm and broad. You can feel his breath hitching at the touch of your fingers, his body shivering as your hands start inching closer and closer to his cock as you walk them down his torso. 

It draws a deep groan from him, yet he keeps kissing you. He continues to caress your breasts until your nipples grow hard against his palms, and that is when he finally moves his hands down. You only get to pop the button of his jeans open before he catches your wrists, stopping you from going further as he brings them to your back, pinning them together to confine you. 

You push and strain against his grasp, only to fail when his hold is firm. Surprisingly, being restrained in his hold and losing control is not making you feel powerless. Instead, it becomes a complete turn-on to have someone taking control of you that your body heats up with a stronger need for more. 

Shocked at this revelation, you pull back with a gasp. 

“Let me touch you,” you whine as you try to pull your hands out of his, drawing a deep chuckle from him. 

“Not yet, baby,” he murmurs against your lips. “I want to see all of you first.”  

He kisses you again, deep enough to make you arch your back so your hips are pressed into his. You widen your legs and he presses forward, his toned thigh pressing at your pulsing center. The sensation you feel as you begin rubbing your covered pussy over his thigh feels explosive, and it is driving you insane that you cannot touch him at the same time. 

You feel him smiling in the kiss, clearly enjoying this; your desperation and need, and the way you are chasing for pleasure even under his restraint. He moves his mouth to your neck again, nipping at the skin. You try to twist your arm to set yourself free, but Namjoon lifts his head to stop you with a look. 

“These naughty hands need to stay back, baby. Do you hear me?” he asks as he guides your hands to rest against the small of your back, your wrists resting on the hard countertop pressing from behind you. 

Your mouth falls open, but every complaint and defiance that you want to give him fades under his dark gaze. Pulling away, Namjoon grabs the hem of your top and pulls it over your head, dropping it behind him, before he once again guides your hands to return to their position on your back. He leans back just enough for him to run his gaze over your body, giving you an appreciative look while humming softly. 

The heat of his gaze only brings back your insecurities, however, as you grow nervous under his trailing eyes, and you look away, casting a quick glance down your middle. Having two kids over the years has left a few things behind; light scars, stretch marks marring your skin, and uneven curves forming in places which you can only hide under your daily clothes. You realise only now one of the many reasons why you had never considered dating and being intimate again with someone—anyone—and much less have any interest in having hookups or one-night-stand. 

Namjoon notices the change of mood in your silence. He captures your chin and gently draws your gaze back to his face. “Don’t be shy,” he murmurs as he presses a light kiss on your lips, “You’re so fucking beautiful.” 

You blink, once again his words winning as you feel your heart strengthening, gaining back your confidence. “You really think so?” you ask him after taking an audible breath. 

“God, yes,” he says with a slight groan in his voice, drawing a soft giggle out of you. “Don’t you ever question it, baby.” 

Biting down your smile, your eyes flutter down with pleasure and relief. “Good.” 

“Now, where were we?” he asks as he lets go of your chin, his arms dropping to his sides. He reaches down to unbutton your tight pants, yet you beat him to it when you take the hem of his shirt in your hands and help him pull it off, before tossing it away out of reach. 

“Naughty girl. What did I say about those hands?” he asks, and then he is kissing you again to distract you from taking back control. 

He wraps his arm around your waist. For a second, you expect him to lift you up and set you up on the counter. Just like those scenes you have often read in the spicy romance book you have edited over the years. But then he surprises you when he lifts you up to carry you away, taking you towards the dining table instead. 

With your eyes fluttering close in the kiss, the only thing you notice is the sound of the chair scrapping on the floor, before he releases you and falls back. Your mind is hazy when you open your eyes, seeing him sitting back on the dining chair while guiding you to stand between his parted legs. 

Swaying a little, you lean into his touch as he sneaks his fingers down the waistband of your tight pants and begins pulling them down. “Let me see these off, baby.” 

He doesn’t have to say it twice, as you slip your thumbs down the band of your pants and begin wiggling it down your legs. You keep your eyes on him while kicking the pants away, ignoring the shudder running through your body at the heat of his gaze and the chill breeze falling on your exposed skin. 

Sneaking a glance down your body, you follow his gaze to be able to see what he is seeing. You are relieved that you had at least thought of choosing a matching pair of new undergarments to wear tonight, instead of wearing your old mismatched ones like you usually do when you have to rush in the mornings. 

Standing in front of him like this makes you feel self-conscious. But the desire that is so palpable in his eyes helps you ignore all unappealing thoughts you ever have about yourself. 

Smiling coyly to him, you sweep your hands up your stomach, slowly reaching up over your breasts. His hands begin to clench on his side as he watches you kneading your covered breasts. You watch him licking his lips when you press your breasts until they come together, offering him with a gentle voice, “Do you like what you’re seeing? Do you want me to take this off too?” 

“No, not yet. I want to enjoy seeing you like this a bit longer,” Namjoon answers you with a deep voice that sounds almost like a growl. “Come here.” 

At his gentle command, your legs move on their own, taking you closer to him. He grabs your waist, keeping you steady as you climb onto his lap, your legs spreading wide around his waist and your arms come around his broad shoulders. 

Being in this position allows you to feel everything. To feel more. 

Every part of him feels hard against your soft body. His warmth comes pressing on every inch of your skin, allowing you to feel the heat rushing under, pooling from between your legs. You feel exposed, and the sensation is intensified as you have your legs opened for him. 

Smiling, Namjoon walks his hand around your waist. With his palm splayed on your back, he gently pushes you forward. Once again, you collide into each other, your breasts are crushed against his chest, and your lips are entangled with his in a hard, needy kiss. 

His kiss is slow, gentle, almost languid. Almost as if he is trying to savour the moment, yet it feels as if you are melting into him. You can still feel him taking control of this moment when his lips are pressing hard against yours and his tongue slipping into your mouth to swallow the sounds you are making. 

In the rising pleasure, your brain is slowly turning into mush. Your eyes flutter close, and you revel in the sensations that he is bringing to your body, to every single touch and kiss. You drown yourself in his heated kiss, as he swallows your moans with his mouth and tongue. You lean into his strong hands as one moves up your stomach, cupping your breast and rubbing against your hardened nipple, and the other moves along the curves of your body, trailing down your waist to your hips, before cupping your soft bottom. 

His palm presses harder into your soft flesh, making you grow alert of your own movements, finally noticing that your body seems to have gained a mind of its own, moving and grinding his lap in the heat of the moment. 

Your covered center starts growing hot and wet as you keep rubbing against his hips. A gasp escapes your throat as you feel his covered hard-on pressing at your pulsing center. Using his palm, Namjoon guides your steady rocking, each thrust forward falling in tune with each thrust and stroke of his tongue in your mouth. 

Within moments, the heat inside your core rising into small waves of pleasure. Drunken in lust, you lean into him more to chase it, rocking harder, faster, pressing more into his hard cock until you feel like you are hanging on the edge of release. 

“Oh, God,” you gasp against his mouth, moments too close to your first orgasm. 

Namjoon mutters a curse, and his hands tighten on the soft flesh of your bottom, putting everything into a halt. He flips you around to face away from him, doing it with such ease as if you weigh nothing. As you fall back against his chest, your knees drape over his thighs, spreading wide, your throbbing pussy facing away from his heat, away from the its final release. 

“You need relief, baby?” His voice sounds thick as he whispers to your ear. Without waiting for your answer, his fingers zero in on the exact place where you need them to be, as he begins rubbing your clit from over your delicate panties. “Hmmm? I need you to answer me. Let me know what you want.” 

“Yes,” you hiss at his touch, barely able to answer his question while urging him on as you rock your hips into his touch. Namjoon’s other hand moves up to cup your breast, kneading and squeezing until you feel your nipple growing hard under your bra. The ache building on your breasts pulses in the same rhythm as the throbbing you feel building on your clit, which he presses the pad of his fingers onto, moving them in circles. 

“God, Namjoon,” you whine, already panting when he keeps touching all the right places, inciting all the reactions from your body as heat rises from your core. Reaching down, you place your hand over his, your fingers pressing atop of his strong digits as you press against them, causing his touch to grow firm and steady, before you slip your fingers under and slide your panties aside for him. 

Namjoon’s chest rumbles as he groans deeply. “Oh, yeah, that’s it, baby. Offer that sweet little pussy for me.” 

Your cheeks flush with warmth upon hearing his words, and then the warmth spreads through your body when his fingers move to touch your flesh. His fingers are big and strong, yet delicate at the same time. They glide over your slit, which has grown embarrassingly wet, capturing every essence of your arousal as he moves them between your folds. You press your pelvis down to meet his touch, urging him on, and he complies by working his middle finger inside you. 

It feels like forever since the last time you have had sex, and it surely shows because you can already feel your orgasm building the second he starts pumping his finger inside you. The pleasure feels maddening. Enough to make you lose control of yourself as your body rocks with him. You don’t even recognise the sounds coming out of your throat as you embrace the sensations he brings out of you. 

As he feels you giving in to the pleasure, Namjoon adds a second finger, stretching you further. 

Your head falls back on his shoulder as you cry out with pleasure. Your body falls lax against him, powerless against his touch. So he moves his other arm down, wrapping it around your waist to keep you from falling as he continues thrusting his fingers in and out, all while pressing the heel of his palm against your clit until you are weeping with desire. When he abruptly pulls his fingers out of you, your pussy clutches on emptiness. 

Needing friction, or something to relief this new need of yours, you begin pressing your wet mound against his thigh, intending to start rubbing against it until you find some kind of release. But Namjoon stops you by delivering a sharp slap, right between your legs. 

“Naughty,” he growls in your ear. “I thought this pussy is mine?” 

Your hips shoot up at the lingering ache, which awakens the throbbing inside your pussy, causing your mind to go fuzzy with the mixed of pain and pleasure he brings to your body. 

Namjoon spanks your pussy again, lighter this time, before going slightly harder when coming back for the third time. Then, as if he knows that you are about to explode, he shoves two fingers right back inside you and starts fucking you with them, moving hard and rough, no longer holding back. It feels intense, sending you light speed towards the peak of your pleasure. 

With a cry slipping out of your lips, your head falls back on his shoulder as the wave of pleasure engulfs you. Digging your nails into his forearms, you ride his fingers, bucking against each thrust of his hand, your walls clenching tightly around him, and your toes curling underneath. Your orgasm comes to you strongly, going on and on while Namjoon keeps his fingers wedged inside you, and you can feel your walls contracting around them as you come all over them. 

Dear God, help me. 

You find yourself praying. Never before had you ever lost control the way you do now. Never once have you ever felt so much pleasure, to make you feel something so intense that you feel like you are losing your mind. 

Namjoon waits until you come down from your release before easing his fingers out of you. Your body grows limp against his, causing him to wrap his arms tighter around you to hold you still. His lips find your shoulder, pressing a gentle kiss while he smooths your panties back in place. 

“That’s it, sweet mama. Relax with me,” he murmurs in your ear, helping you calm down before rearranging your position until you come to face him once more, your legs straddling his toned thighs, pressing against his muscles, his warmth, and the rapid pounding of his heartbeat under your palms.  

“Everything okay?” 

You are still too delirious that you can barely think straight, yet you manage to nod and whisper, “Yeah. Everything’s good.” 

Looking into his eyes, you reach down between your bodies and press your palm over his covered bulge. “But I’m not sure that you’re feeling the same.” 

Groaning deeply, Namjoon’s eyes flutter to close. You continue stroking his covered cock, feeling it hardening under your touch and pushing against his pants that is partly undone. “Keep touching me like that, mama. And I’ll fuck you right here, right now. Or I’ll take you right on top of that counter, right where you’ll be making breakfast for your sweet girls the first morning they’re home.” 

His threat draws a moan from deep within your throat. Biting your lips, you steal a glance towards the kitchen counter. As tempting as it sounds to follow your wanton desire, to be taken hard and rough right where you spend most of your days and mornings, you want something different. You don’t want this to end so quickly, for the night to feel so instant, and you want to savour this pleasure for as long as you are allowed to.  

“Mmm…No, we can’t have that,” you whisper, turning to him to nip his jaw, making him groan. Carefully, you step back from his lap. Your legs are trembling when you try to stand on your own, yet you muster a smile as you calmly say, “Come.” 

You hold out your hand and he grabs it as he rises to his feet. He follows you down the hall and up the stairwell. Past the landing which is surrounded by framed pictures of yourself with your family and your sweet girls and their creative drawings filling the walls, you continue walking upstairs, feeling more self-conscious the closer you get to your bedroom. 

Right before your nerves begin to get in the way, Namjoon’s arms come around you, holding you to his chest as you crash through the doorway to your bedroom. His lips capture yours, swallowing the sound of your laughter until you fall backwards on the bed. 

Standing on the foot of the bed, Namjoon stands tall, a solid figure standing at the center of your world of chaos. He says nothing as he runs his gaze over your body, appreciating what he sees one last time which brings back your confidence. All for knowing that he is liking what he sees. 

Drawn by the urge to touch him, to feel, you push yourself up and start tugging his pants down. “Off—” you murmur as you struggle to peel the damn thing off of him, earning his chuckle. Namjoon helps you halfway, stopping briefly to pull something out of his back pocket before he tosses his whole pants away. He wastes no more time to continue where he left off, as he pushes you back to the bed and lowers himself to you. 

Your arms go around his shoulders to welcome him. Your eyes meet each other again, allowing you to see something that you failed to notice before. Behind his heated gaze, the warm dimple smile, and the alluring words filled with his raw desire, lies another emotion haunting like a shadow. 

An emotion that you know too damn well as it mirrors your own. 

Desperation. 

Swallowing hard, you feel the same emotion coming out of you in strides; the desperation to belong and to be happy; to be able to move through life without being haunted by the unwarranted fear of getting hurt. The desperation to feel. 

Allowing that emotion to take over, you pull him down to you and kiss him deeply. You run your hands down his back, pressing at his spine until he lowers his hips onto yours. You can feel his hard cock pressing on you, its wet tip sticking out from the top of his briefs, rubbing against your skin. You regret not having the chance to have a look at it, to appreciate it through more than your dainty touch. Yet you cannot deny the desperate need to feel him inside you, filling you up until there is nothing left of you when he is done. 

Arching your back, you rock against him, pressing your tender center against his bulge. His mouth unlatches from yours, and then he pulls the lacy cups of your bra with a rough tug, tucking them under your breasts to push them up. He keeps his palms on them, touching them directly this time, skin to skin, bringing all the shudders back and rising twofolds as you cry out his name. 

His mouth finds your neck, and the touch of his lips is almost enough to make you come and unravel right there and then, yet you manage to hold back with a bite of your lip. Without taking his mouth off of you, Namjoon runs his hand down, finding your center and pressing down. The pleasure sparks through your body like fireworks as he rubs in circles against your covered center, pressing against your slit, rubbing at your covered clit, and then finding your wetness to draw out more essence out of you. 

Every nerve in your body comes awake and lights up at the same time, allowing you to feel everything that he is giving you. Engulfed in the pleasure, you barely feel him as Namjoon starts moving down, spreading his fingers down your thighs to part your legs for him, before plunging his head between your quivering thighs. 

You feel a soft tug at your panties, and then cold breeze touches your skin as Namjoon slides the center of your panties aside, exposing your tender pussy. “I wanted to taste you so badly,” he murmurs against your skin as he presses his lips on the apex of your thigh, then he moves to the other side, before reaching to the center, drawing a sharp cry out of you when he presses a kiss right at your folds. 

His tongue drags through your flesh before he sucks gently on your swollen bud. A shiver shoots right up through your body as pleasure sparks from beneath, and he starts fucking you with his tongue. In and out he presses and licks with his warm, soft tongue, tasting your essence with a deep hum, while his mouth keeps stealing a kiss and sucking, intensifying the pleasure. 

With your hands sinking into the sheets beneath you, your hips begin to move, rocking against his mouth and riding the sensation as it grows more and more intense. You lift your head to watch him work. The look he gives you when he returns your gaze causes your body to twitch, your muscles tightening as pleasure coils through your core. 

With a grin, Namjoon buries his face deeper, his teeth grazing at your clit before lapping at the swollen bud with his tongue to take away the pinch of pain. The sensation sends your body falling back. Still rocking your hips to ride the pleasure, you twist the sheets in one hand, and then take a handful of his short hair with the other. 

It doesn’t take long before the familiar wave of pleasure starts rolling through your body, rising intensely from the depth of your core. Your breath quickens as you are climaxing into his mouth. It comes so strongly that you can feel it rushing all the way down to your toes. A series of breathless moans come out of your lips at the same pace as the pulses of pleasure coming alight from inside as your orgasm rolls through your body. 

Your head is ringing with the waves of your orgasm that you barely aware of how you are pulling at his hair, twisting the short strands in your grasp as you writhe beneath him. Yet he doesn’t stop. Not even when he feels you slowly coming down from your high. 

Namjoon continues to lap at your taste, licking away your release as he murmurs gently against your mound, “Fuck, you taste so damn good, baby.” 

His voice fades in and out of you, until he slips a finger inside you, pressing against your inner walls. He pushes right in, curling the tip as he pulls out, finding the sweet spot that sends another jolt of pleasure through your body. Realising this, he adds another finger and starts working them at the same rhythm as the movement of his tongue. Your legs begin shaking, your hips are rising against his other palm that is resting on your lower belly to keep you down, but nothing holds you from erupting as the force of your second orgasm quickly rolls through you, sending you over the edge with a cry. 

You feel a shift on the bed as Namjoon moves on top of you and presses his lips on yours. The remnants of your orgasm is still pulsing through you, and your ears are still ringing, that you can only take what he is giving you, letting him bring you back to the present with his kiss. 

Once you manage to catch your breath, you bring your hands up to him and start pushing his briefs down his hips. He rises slightly from you, taking away his weight and his warmth as he kicks his briefs down his ankle and away. His hand reaches down, wrapping his fingers around his hard girth. 

This time, you take the chance to appreciate his beauty. Just like his hard body, his cock seems beautiful, big and thick and heavy even in his strong palm. 

With his eyes on your face, Namjoon begins lowering himself on you. Your hips rise to welcome him when you feel his cock falling heavy on your stomach. Your hand reaches down between you, as if you are under a spell. Your fingers wrap around him, drawing a soft gasp from his lips. 

Licking your lips, you watch yourself giving him a few light strokes. He seems to enjoy this, as his hips slowly move to return each stroke, each brush of your palm with a thrust of his cock. Groaning deeply, Namjoon bends down to cover you with his hard body. His lips find your neck, kissing the column of your throat as his fingers return to your mounds, pressing into your slit and using the slickness of your arousal and release to move around your entrance. 

“Namjoon, please—” Your breath catches when you feel the tip of his finger pressing at your entrance, pushing against your sensitive walls. He enters you slowly with his fingers. It feels delightful, yet you are ready to feel more. “Mhhh…not enough,” you whine breathlessly, “I want you…inside…now.” 

He chuckles against your throat, and the vibrations you feel coming from his body aren’t exactly helping to lessen the pool of desire between your legs, nor the tight clench of your walls around his fingers. He gives your pussy a few more thrusts of his fingers before he pulls them out, and reaches out to the other side of the bed. 

The soft crinkle sound of a foil gets your heartbeat speeding up in your chest. It’s happening, the voice in your head whispers. Excitement rolls through you, and a wicked through flashes through your head when you meet his gaze again. 

You bite your lip and smile, and then you lift your hands, pushing against his shoulders to bring him down onto the mattress. You follow him as he falls back, and then you climb on top of him, enjoying the thrill rushing through you when you see the shock clearly flashing through his gaze. 

He grips your hips as you straddle him, keeping you steady until you are sitting in the right position. So right that you can feel his hard cock pressing at your slick center from beneath. 

“Well, damn,” he chuckles as he watches you press down your hips on him. “That’s it. Take control, mama. Show me what you want from me.” 

You make a humming sound as you begin rocking over him, pressing down against his length. Your panties have grown completely soiled, placed improperly over your mound that you can feel him partly rubbing against your skin. “You know what I want,” you whisper, moaning when you feel his girth rubbing at your clit. 

Hoping to feel more, you continue rocking, rubbing your center along the length of his cock. But it isn’t enough. The panties keep getting in the way just when you are close to getting what you want. You reach down to begin peeling the damn thing off of you when Namjoon takes over. 

“Let me help you with that,” he says, before he suddenly lifts himself up to a sitting position. His hands are quick to catch your waist to stop you from falling back, keeping you on his lap as he moves his hand to your back.

His eyes look down on your heaving chest, and then his hands are pulling at your undergarments. Starting from your bra, as he expertly peels it off of you within a blink of an eye, then continuing to reach down. The ripping sound of your panties as they fall apart fills the room before you can feel yourself being freed from its presence. The strong pull that he gives on the flimsy fabric barely feels like anything on your skin, your mind too muddled to process it until it is too late. 

The moment it dawns on you what is happening, there is nothing else that you can do but to watch with wide eyes, mouth gaping in shock, as Namjoon lifts your ruined panties to his lips and breathes in.

“You won’t be needing them for a while,” he says with a hum at the sound of your sharp inhale of breath.   

“You’re so bad.” An incredulous laugh comes out of you as he tosses the tattered panties away. 

His hands return to your waist then and he pulls you closer, settling you down nicely on his lap as he asks, “Maybe I am. Are you going to punish me for being a bad boy?” 

“Maybe I will,” you tease him as you run your fingers up his chest, pushing him back down. “Naughty boy.” 

The glimmer of the foil he is holding between his fingers catches your attention. You pick it up, ripping the foil and letting the rubber fall on your palm. “Is this okay?” 

He nods, and then his eyes darken as you gently slide the condom down the length of his cock. Your can feel him twitching under your touch, his head falling back briefly with a groan coming out of his throat when the tips of your fingers meet his skin. Once he is perfectly covered, you move back into position. 

Namjoon gently guides you back over him, straddling him once again without anything else getting in the way this time. 

You lean forward and place a kiss on his lips, one that feels a bit too sweet and shy. For a moment, your confidence wanes. Being on top of him, unrestrained, and being in complete control makes you feel subconscious with yourself. It makes you feel insecure, suddenly feeling worried that you might not be enough. 

As you sit up, your pussy rocks against his cock. You can feel his girth pressing against the dampness which has been growing between your legs, the heat of his body radiates from him and it transfers through your body with each pulse of his blood that you feel against you. 

His fingers find their place between your legs, rubbing your clit in slow circles, drawing moans after moans, shudders rolling through your body that you begin moving in response to his touch. Your hips buck up against his hand, desperate for friction. You continue rolling your body as he presses just a bit harder, drawing yet another moan from your lips that comes together with the intense shiver surging from your core. 

Enjoying the way you are reacting to him, he rises up to steal a kiss, chuckling softly against your mouth when he feels the twitch of your hips when his cock is pressing harder against your folds. He pulls back, showing you his wicked grin that has your heart beating rapidly. 

You lift your hips, and he reaches down to position his cock against your opening. Your body instantly trembles when you feel him nudging against your pussy, spreading your entrance to allow himself in. Then you begin to slide down on him, taking it slow as you take his cock inside you, inch by delicious inch. Your legs quiver around him as you feel him spreading your tight walls, yet you welcome him with a slow moan, allowing yourself to take him deeper as you continue going down, until he is almost fully inside you and you are nearly resting on his hips. 

A pulse rocks through you once, and you carefully lift yourself up, sliding up his length and coming back down, getting deeper in your descent. 

“You are so perfect,” he whispers to you as you continue riding his cock, keeping a slow pace as you adjust yourself to his size. 

Namjoon falls back, letting you take control. Something that no other person has ever done before. He keeps his eyes on you as you continue moving on top of him, sliding up and down the length of his cock, while embracing the waves of pleasure that you get to feel from your constant rocking. His eyes are filled with admiration as he watches you move, your head falling back at the height of your pleasure, your chest arching, showing him the sight of your shaking breasts. 

“You are so fucking hot,” he moans, taking your breasts in his hands. You relish every single sensation you are feeling with a moan. It feels incredible. Not just this—the sex, the feeling of him being buried inside your heat, filling you up and giving you pleasure—but also for feeling like you are free. 

Sitting naked on top of such a gorgeous man, rocking up and down his cock, enjoying the pleasure without your nerves getting in the way, your insecurities left forgotten. It feels so damn empowering to be owning up to your sexuality, to your wanton desire, after having it denied for so long. All because of your haunting past making you feel like you are less than the person you are now. 

These thoughts push you to ride him harder, faster, your fingers sinking into the sheets on either side of him to anchor you against him, while his fingers grow tighter on your hips to help you ride him to chase your pleasure. 

“That’s it, baby,” he urges you on with a breathy voice, deep groans slipping out of him when you begin fucking him wildly. “Go on, let it go, mama.” 

Holding you up against him, Namjoon begins rocking his hips, thrusting up to meet you in your descend. The maddening pleasure rocks through you, and another wave of climax sets off, coiling from your core, up to your lower belly. And right as you are ready to plunge into your climax, Namjoon bends forward, capturing one of your nipples with his mouth and begins sucking, while he reaches up to pinch the other with his fingers. 

With a sharp cry, you unravel completely without fail. Your orgasm comes to you not in waves but an explosion, the pain only intensifies the pleasure as it hits, and your body trembles as you embrace it. 

Everything fades in and out as your mind and body recovers from the intense high. Your legs are quivering too much that you fall onto his chest, and Namjoon carefully flips you to the side until you are on your back. Ears once again ringing, the sounds of him moving on the sheets seem so distant. But you can feel the dip when he lowers himself on you, his lips finding yours, bringing you back, and then pressing against your neck to quiet down the rapid pulsing of blood surging under your skin. 

Once your mind regains clarity, you notice his hand moving. You open your eyes when you cannot feel his touch, and realise that he is giving himself some lazy strokes. “You haven’t gotten yours,” you whisper with a raspy voice, and his grin returns. 

“You’ve already came too many times, so—” 

Shaking your head, you reach up and pull him back to you. “I can’t be the only one feeling good tonight,” you insist as you capture his lips, enticing him with a light bite. As he returns the kiss, your legs spread open for him, welcoming him back to you. “I want to make you feel good too.” 

Groaning, Namjoon deepens the kiss. Still stroking himself, he uses the other hand to gently touch your tender pussy, making sure that you won’t hurt if he continues. “Are you sure?” he murmurs against your lips, before feeling you nod. 

Unable to wait long, he quickly gets between your legs again. He covers you with his heat, his toned chest pressing down against your body, delightfully engulfing you with his warmth. Then his hips rock forward, pressing the wet tip of his stiff cock against your pulsing heat. Your back arches the moment you feel him pushing, just enough until you feel the tip penetrating your entrance.

“Namjoon—” you gasp out his name, and his hands come down to your hips, holding you still as he enters you, thrusting deep and slow. 

Your legs are spread wider, giving him room to get as deep as he possibly can until your hips are flushed against each other. 

Fuck yes, you can hear yourself screaming in your head, while your mouth gapes open with a breathless moan at how full you are feeling with him snugged inside your pussy. 

“God, fuck—you feel amazing,” he breathes out as he too becomes still. 

Your body clenches around his cock at hearing his words, loving how his praise is stroking at your ego. It seems that your body has gotten used to him so well that he feels like a perfect fit inside you. 

“You don’t feel too bad yourself,” you playfully tease him, making him groan deeply that you can feel his entire body vibrating all the way to your core. 

“Not bad, huh?” he groans, almost sounding feral when he continues his gentle rocking. “Guess I’ll have to stop holding back, then.” 

With a groan, he pulls back almost all the way out and thrusts back into you, rocking both of you against the mattress as he fucks you into it. You grab tightly on the messy sheets beneath you, already tangled by the previous rocking and fucking and growing even messier now that he is picking up pace immediately. It feels intense, making you feel delirious as he moves in and out of you rapidly. And it feels so damn good that you just don’t want it to stop. 

“Oh, baby...so perfect,” he gasps, and you open your eyes to see his eyes glazing over with pleasure as he gets lost in your body. 

It turns you on so badly to see a man unraveling this way—to be so lost in his pleasure and growing feral as he gives in completely to the sensation. At the same time, it makes you feel powerful, knowing that you are the one making him this way. For someone like him to let his guard down and show you the real part of him. To let you see how raw and passionate he becomes when he is bringing pleasure to both of your bodies. 

It makes you feel so hot, and it feels so good, that it practically sends you straight into your final climax. To unravel the same way he does at the pleasure of his lovemaking. 

“Keep tightening around me like that, and I won’t last long,” he warns you, while you can only hold back a grin. As if you will take his words like you would to a threat. 

You run your hands up his chest, feeling up his toned muscles as they strain with each thrust he is giving you, before you reach up to the back of his neck and grab a handful of his short hair. A smile grows on your face when he lets out another groan, and his hips nearly buckle and twitch as his rocking begins to grow haste. 

He’s close. 

“Oh, fuck. I’m coming,” he groans, although it almost sounds like he is shouting.

“Yes, please. Come with me. I’m also there,” you whimper breathlessly when your orgasm starts to build. 

His grip on your hips tightens as he begins pumping into you fast and hard, hitting all the right spots. You almost believe that he is also growing firmer, harder, bigger, that the only thing you can feel is him, rubbing against your throbbing walls and pushing you over the edge. 

A scream slips out of you when the orgasm hits like a massive wave. Your back is almost lifted completely off the bed as your entire body vibrates with pleasure. You can hear him shouting under the sound of your rapid heartbeat, before you feel him pulsing, spilling his heat into you as he joins you in his own orgasm. 

Your legs are wrapped around his hips while your arms are hooked around his neck as you hold onto him, refusing to let go as you relish the waves of your orgasm until they begin to settle. You have barely gotten back control of your breathing when he leans down, capturing your lips into a kiss. 

The kiss is slow, almost languid, and just as gentle as the movement of his hands as he runs them down your sweaty body. You can still the spasms of your climax lingering as he slowly pulls out of you, allowing you to feel his presence even as he pulls away, dropping right beside you with a soft grunt. 

Your eyes are already fluttering to close while he takes his time taking care of his soiled condom and tossing it away to the trash. Yet you are still coherent when he returns, engulfing you in his strong arms, filling your breath with his scent. 

“That was fucking amazing,” he mumbles against your skin as you feel his lips pressing on your bare shoulder. 

“Hmm…yes, it was…” 

A sigh leaves your lips. The content feeling weaving through your body steals the words that you want so badly to say. 

Incredible. Astounding. 

“Magical,” you find yourself whispering, drawing a soft chuckle from him. 

You look at him through your hazy eyes, finding him looking back at you with a different shadow lingering in his gaze which makes you want to say the words that you never expected you would say to him. 

Stay the night. 

The words die on your tongue as sleep is slowly dragging you down. You try to fight it, even if you aren’t quite sure about saying those words out loud. You have no idea what will come out of this. All you can think about is that you don’t want this to end too soon. 

“The girls are out all weekend, aren’t they?” His voice breaks the silence, forcing you to open your eyes. 

“Yes, they’re staying at their grandparents. I won’t have to pick them up until Monday afternoon,” you breathlessly answer, recalling faintly how your mother had offered to take Suzy to school and Hana to kindergarten so you wouldn’t have to drive all the way to her house on a Sunday, expecting you to sleep through your hangover and spend the day resting. “Why are you asking?” 

“I just wasn’t sure how they would react coming home to find a grown-ass man snuggling with their mom.” He softly chuckles, and in a brief moment of silence, you see a different look appearing in his eyes. A part of him that seems more vulnerable coming out of him in waves, right before he asks you, “Unless you want me out of here?” 

Once again, you can see yourself in his gaze. To once again share the same emotions, the same vulnerability which feels too damn familiar. Deep down, you start wishing that you didn’t see it. Because seeing this side of him only makes you care a lot more than you should for someone who is only supposed to be your one-night-stand. Because seeing it only makes you want more. 

You close your eyes and try not to think too deeply about it. Not when your mind is still muddled from the wild sex you just had with him. And when his touch is still lingering on your skin. 

You can worry about this tomorrow, you hear the same small voice in your head whispering, and you decide that you are going to listen this time. 

Pushing yourself up, you pull the blanket from the foot of the bed and drag it up to cover both of your nakedness before sliding back to him. “Nope, you’re staying,” you firmly say as you tuck him in. “I promised to make you dinner, but I really don’t have any energy left to leave the bed right now, so you can make it up by helping me make breakfast tomorrow.” 

Namjoon laughs. He visibly relaxes beside you when he mutters, “I love it when you boss me around.” 

You stop to look at him, biting your lips before asking, “Would you mind if I keep doing that?” 

His smile softens, and the alluring dimple returns for a brief second as he leans in to kiss your temple. “Boss me around anytime, mama. I’ll be good. I promise.” 

Author’s Note 2.0 | Thank you for reading. If you enjoyed this story, please leave a like and reblog to share with your friends and let me know what you think. See you in the next one! PS. You can get to know Jin the bartender and read his story in Blurred Lines.  Update | you can read more in the short story: Dinner with Mista Joonie

— ©Yoonia, all rights reserved. reposting/modifying of any kind, translations, unsanctioned adaptations are not allowed.

[sunrizef1]

Austin Orange

Daniel Ricciardo x fem!reader

summary: Daniel’s obsession with Austin goes even farther than just the city.

A/n: finished this at 1 am lmao

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yourusername

Austin, Texas 📍

liked by danielricciardo yourbsf and 12,762 others

yourusername hook’em 🐮🧡

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user1 I love her

user2 slayyy

user3 is she from Austin?

↳ user4 I think she’s from somewhere in east Texas, he family owns a ranch near Austin tho

user5 Daniel in the likes??? 😭

user6 Danny ric????

user7 you guys are late Danny’s been in this girls like for a loooong time

user8 😍

user9 r we gonna get farm content???

danielricciardo 😍

↳ user10 get outta here

↳ user8 I commented this too ur not special

↳ user2 a man…

danielricciardo

Austin, tx 📍

liked by landonorris Mclaren and 1,098,345 others

danielricciardo horns up 🤠

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landonoriss 🐮

user11 I <3 cowboy daniel

user12 Texas is my fav

user13 I recognize that hat shop…

user14 funniest thing is Daniel didn't even go to UT 😭

user15 this looks similar to a certain cow-girls post…

↳ user16 girl what

↳ user17 @/yourusername just posted and it was like these same pics

↳ user18 and Daniel even liked it lmao

↳ user19 not even trying to hide it lol

redbullracing 🐂

user20 does he understand college football???

user21 🐄🤠🧡

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo yourbsf and 38,422 others

yourusername god bless texas 🧡

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user22 where is heeeee

user23 the cow 🥹

user24 ranch content!

user25 I thought cowgirls were just in movies…

user26 liked by danielricciardo

user27 what’s the animals names?

↳ yourusername the cow is named Cheeto and the horse is named Billy <3

↳ user28 CHEETO?? 😭

danielricciardo 👋

↳ yourusername 👋

user29 YALL SEEING THIS?

user30 she responded!!!!

user31 so they’re in love now

user32 I wanna be a farm girlie 🥲

yourusername added to their story

yourbsf

↳ wonder who took that picture 🤔

yourusername

↳ 😒

danielricciardo added to their story

landonorris

↳ 👀 did you get a certain Texan to show you around???

danielricciardo

↳ mate.

TWITTER

INSTAGRAM

danielricciardo

Liked by maxverstappen landonorris and 1,209,301 others

danielricciardo 🧡

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user33 sorry???

user34 🧑‍🦯 I do not see

user35 IS THAT Y/N????

user36 ewww

user37 CHEETO???

user38 no cuz you guys don’t get it, y/n had used the orange heart for forever and now Daniel is posting it after he finally got to meet her my heart can’t take it

landonorris 💋💋💋

↳ danielricciardo shut up

user39 that better be y/n or so help me god

user40 lando?? 😭

yourbsf 👀

liked by danielricciardo

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo landonorris and 112,332 others

yourusername she’s country

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user41 danielllll

user42 that’s Daniel if I’ve ever seen him

user43 billyyyyy

↳ user44 the true star

landonorris hey

↳ danielricciardo ???

user45 she’s so bae

user46 when she’s from Texas >

user47 I still don’t like her

↳ yourbsf girl stfu he won’t pick you

liked by yourusername

user48 liked by danielricciardo

user49 I’m in love with them both

user50 I don’t think that’s Daniel 🤷‍♀️

↳ user51 girl where else would Danny get a cow from

yourusername added to their story

INSTAGRAM

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo yourbsf and 506,321 others

yourusername he’s new around here 🧡

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user52 oh god they’re like sickeningly sweet

user54 YEAHHHHH

user55 Daniel Ricciardo school of manifestation

user56 THIS IS WHAT WEVE BEEN WANTING

user57 couple of the year I fear

danielricciardo my lady 🧡

↳ yourusername my cowboy 🧡

↳ user58 AWWWWW

user59 sobbing

landonorris 🤠💋

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user60 I’m in love with both of them

user61 fav couple

[pretty-circa006]

Livestream

Sugar Daddy! Coach! Negan x Cam girl! F! Reader

summary Negan stays true to his promise tags smut, unprotected p in v, multiple cream pies, breeding kink i guess, vaginal fingering, exhibitionism, pet-names, dirty talk, age gap

wc 2.9k words

previous parts: 1 , 2

note here's the final part, finally! i am so so so so so sorry i took forever uploading this. i was having the worst writers block, but i think im finally over it! i hope this was worth the wait P.S. im so sorry if i missed any mistakes while proofreading, it's 3am and im sleepy as fuck

*you are responsible for your own content consumption. if this is something you DO NOT like, simply DO NOT read or interact! :) *

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“You look so sexy in this, baby,” Negan whispers in her ear as they stand in front of her full length mirror. When Negan arrived to her apartment earlier, he brought her some gifts—a bouquet of flowers and new lingerie. 

“Really? I never thought I looked good in pink,” she replies. Negan’s hands slide down her body and grasp her hips, pulling her closer into him. He leans down and kisses along her jaw to her neck until she giggles at the feeling of his facial hair tickling her soft skin

“You look fuckin’ perfect in anything.” He pulls her in for a lingering kiss before sitting down on her bed. She stays in front of the mirror, admiring herself in the lingerie. It’s a pink flyaway babydoll that’s frilly on the ends and completely see-through, finished with a little bow at the center of the bra part. 

“Ready to do this livestream?” he asks, looking up at her from beneath his long, dark lashes. She makes her way over to him and climbs into his lap, straddling him. His hands slide up her back before pulling her down to meet his lips by the back of her neck. She wraps her arms around his neck, deepening the kiss as she grinds herself against the growing bulge in his jeans. 

“You trying to make me cum before we even get started?” he asks with a raised brow after pulling away from her lips. She smiles before sneaking one more quick kiss. He misses the warmth of her body on his when she gets up to set her phone up on the little tripod she bought with some of the money he gave her. 

“Ready?” she asks as she adjusts it. 

He nods his head as he unbuckles his belt. “C’mere, babydoll.” She begins the stream and rushes over to him. His eyes are full of lust as he looks up at her, admiring her body. 

“On your knees,” he commands gently. With her back still facing the camera, she lowers herself to her knees, coming face to face his bulge. She undoes his jeans and he lifts his hips so she can pull them down along with his boxer briefs. His large, hardened cock springs free, slapping against his abdomen. 

“I’ve been waiting so long to feel it in person,” she comments before placing a gentle kiss to the tip. He caresses the side of her face before smacking his cock against her lips, spreading his precum on them like lipgloss. She licks her lips before taking his tip into her mouth. He breathes in sharply, feeling her soft hands stroking what isn’t in her mouth. She swirls her tongue around him before taking more of his shaft into her mouth, feeling each vein sliding across her tongue. 

“That’s it, baby, just like that,” he praises. She hollows her cheeks as she bobs her head up and down the length of him, gripping either of his thighs for support. 

“Holy fuck, I thought you were a virgin.”

With innocent eyes, she looks up at him before taking the entirety of him down her throat. She gags, but only once and it feels so good around him. He leans back, supporting himself on his hands as he lets her suck him off. Profanities spill from his mouth and his breathing grows quick and shallow. He can’t hold himself back anymore and grabs the hair at the back of her head. Negan holds on to her hair tightly as his hips lift with every thrust he fucks into her face. 

“Fuck, baby, fuck. I’m gonna fuckin’ come down your throat.” She doesn’t need his words to know that he’s close. She can feel his cock twitch inside her mouth and his grip tighten in her hair. 

“Ah fuck,” he swears before emptying his load down her throat. He pulls out of her mouth with a pop. She looks up at him, admiring his flushed face and lustful eyes. His hand grips her jaw, forcing her mouth open. 

“Swallowed that shit like a goddamn pro,” he admires. She smiles and stands up on her knees, wrapping her arms around his broad shoulders. Pulling him close, she connects their lips. Negan pulls her into his lap without breaking the kiss. As their tongues mingle in each other's mouths, Negan can taste himself. He removes himself from her lips and kisses a trail down her throat until he reaches her sternum. Negan slides the thin straps of her lingerie down her arms and pulls it down, freeing her breasts and bunching it at her waist. He takes one in his mouth, swirling his tongue around the hardened nipple while teasing the other with his free hand. Her fingers tangle in his hair as she tosses her head back, moaning in pleasure. Slowly, she grinds her hips against him, feeling every detail of his dick through her thin panties. Without warning, he turns her around so her back is against his chest. Her core aches so bad with the desperation to be filled that she doesn't even care if her face is in the camera or not. She leans her head back over his shoulder and presses delicate kisses against his jaw. His large hands slides down her body, stopping at the waistband of her panties, but instead of pulling them down like a normal person, he rips the sheer fabric in half, tearing them off her body. 

"Those were new!" she complains. 

"Shhh, I'll buy you something even better," he whispers in her ear before playfully nipping at the lobe. 

With one arm, he lifts her legs by the backs of her knees, pressing them against her chest and putting her bare pussy on full display. His free hand comes down to rub tight, fast circles against her clit. She gasps and arches her back, her eyes screwing shut from the pleasure. His fingers slide down her folds, coating them in her arousal before bringing his finger to his mouth, licking it clean of her fluids. 

"Been waitin' so long to taste you baby. Fuckin' delicious!" he praises. Her only response comes out in the form of a breathy moan. Two of his thick fingers enter her pussy and the way he could feel it stretching to accommodate him brought a smirk to his face. 

"Baby, you're so goddamn tight," he whispers before pressing his lips to her neck, sucking a mark onto her soft skin. She whimpers when she feels the rough pads of his fingers pressing against her g-spot. 

"Ah! Negan!" she yelps, her fingers gripping the comforter of her bed. He slips in a third finger and she tenses, sucking in a sharp, pained breath through her teeth. 

"C'mon, princess, I know you can take it," his raspy voice encourages as he distracts her from the pain by playing with her clit with his thumb. His thrusts are slow while he waits for her to grow comfortable with the stretch and once he feels her relax against his body, he knows she's there and quickens his pace. Her breathing becomes shallow as the coil in her stomach comes close to bursting. 

"Please, Negan, please! I'm so close." 

"What'd I tell you about patience? Hm?" 

"Negan!" she protests, tears burning in her eyes as he slows his pace, making her fall from the peak of orgasm she almost reached. 

"Not just yet. I wanna feel you coming on my cock." 

"I can do both! Just please lemme come now," she begs, tears now cascading down her cheeks. 

"Look at you. So desperate for me to fuck this tiny pussy with my fingers." Without warning, he enters another finger, earning a pleasured scream from her. He could feel her legs shaking as he brought her close to her orgasm once again. Her toes flex and curl in the air as her orgasm tears through her body. Negan continues to fuck her with his fingers until he feels her relax against him. 

He gently sets her legs down and holds her in his lap, giving her a minute to catch her breath. 

"You did so good for me, baby," he whispers soothingly in her ear. She turns around in his lap and turns to face him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. 

"Now will you fuck me?" she asks, batting the lashes of her pleading, doe eyes at him. He cups her cheek in his large hand and wipes at her fallen tears. 

"Of course. I can't resist you for another goddamn minute." 

With faux innocence, she smiles at him before grabbing his hand, the one he fingered her with, and begins sucking her juices off his fingers. As she does, she grinds her bare pussy over his once again hardened cock, feeling every vein drag along her sensitive folds.

"Keep doin' that and I'm gonna fuckin' come again and won't have it in me to stuff that tight pussy of yours." 

She pouts reaches for the bottom of his black t-shirt instead. He lifts his arms and allows her to pull it over his head. She runs her hands up his strong chest before pressing kisses on it, occasionally leaving marks across his body. His hands caress her soft body before gently maneuvering her off his lap and onto the bed. She watches him expectantly as he stands and rids himself of the rest of his clothing.  The look of lustful admiration in her eyes is flattering to Negan, but he can also see a slight fear in them. He caresses the side of her face with his hands and gently tilts her head to look up at him. 

"It's okay, baby, I'll be gentle," he reassures. She lays back against her pillows as he crawls over her, trapping her between his arms. He leans down and meets her lips in a kiss. She wraps her arms around his neck as she slides her tongue in his mouth. A gasp escapes her lips when she feels his tip sliding across her folds. Negan can tell she's nervous, so he continues kissing her as a distraction from the impending intrusion. He lines himself up with her entrance and she tenses at the slight stretch of his tip.

"You took four fingers just fine, but you're still nervous?" She rolls her eyes earning a chuckle from him. 

"I'm jus' teasin' ya, baby, relax." He kisses her collar bone before kissing down to her breasts, taking one in his mouth to further distract her. Her fingers tangle in his hair as she moans at the sensation of his tongue flicking at her nipple. Her moans intensify as he slides himself in as slowly as he can. His four fingers have nothing on his dick, but they did help prep her for its largeness because it doesn't hurt as much as she anticipated.

He pulls away from her nipple and begins slowly thrusting in and out of her. Her warm, wet cunt squeezes him so tight that he can hardly resist fucking into her like a madman, but he wants her to enjoy her first time just as much as he's enjoying it. Her smooth legs wrap around his hips, as if she were silently begging for more. His larger hands grasped her smaller ones, intertwining his fingers with hers as he fucked her harder. Negan’s long lashes kiss his cheeks as his eyes fluter shut, the pleasure overtaking him. His face is flushed and breathing shallow and god, he looks so beautiful. 

“Fuck, baby, you’re squeezing me so goddamn tight.” 

“M gonna come,” she wines, her hands squeezing his, similar to the way her cunt is squeezing his cock. 

Negan is about to pull out, but her legs around his waist keep him from doing so. 

“Come inside me.”

He seems hesitant for a moment, but that quickly goes away when he bottoms out inside of her, filling her with his cum as she screams his name, her own orgasm bringing her to pleasure’s peak. She thought this was it, they both made each other come and now she’d just lay in his arms, but Negan flipping her over and positioning her on all fours tells her that she was mistaken. He spreads apart her asscheeks, watching the way his cum oozes out of her fucked out cunt. He steps away for a second and she watches him in confusion. 

“Watcha doin’?” 

But she doesn’t need a response because her question is answered when he comes back with the phone camera in hand, pointed at his hardening dick. She feels the mattress dip behind her when he gets back on the bed. She shudders at the feeling of his thick fingers spreading open her sensitive folds, mixed with the feeling of his hot cum dripping from her cunt down her inner thigh. 

“Look at this fuckin’ cream pie. None of you sorry sacks of shit could fill this pussy like I do,” he boasts to the viewers as he films her up close. 

“Mmmm Negan, I need you,” she whines. 

“How could I say no to this perfect fuckin’ pussy.”

He kneads the soft flesh of her ass with the hand that isn’t holding the camera before bringing his hand to his cock, lining it up with her entrance once again. He thrusts all the way in this time, not needing her to adjust to his size. His cock gets her in all the right spots. She can feel every detail of it gliding against her velvety walls as he fucks her. This time he's really fucking her. He was sweet and gentle when taking her virginity the first time around, almost as if they were making love, almost. But he can't hold himself back from the primitive desire to pound into her until her legs are shaking and the only thoughts she can conjure are of him. His free hand holds her hip in a bruising grip as he records his dick coming in and out of her cunt. Her arms shake with the struggle of holding herself up before she finally gives out, falling face first into the mattress. 

"Negan 'mgonnacome," she whines, the sound muffled by her face being in the mattress. 

“Just hang on, baby,” he grunts. 

“Ah! Negan,” she moans, her hands fisting her sheets as her legs shake. Had Negan not been holding on to her, she’d have collapsed ages ago. The springs of her mattress squeak in unison with his hips smacking against her ass.

“Oh, baby, you’ve ruined any other pussy for me,” he says between pants. Once again, she feels that familiar feeling she’s growing to love of Negan coming inside of her. Her legs give out and she collapses onto her mattress as she comes in unison with Negan. Behind her, Negan lays down on her bed, catching his breath as he comes down from his orgasmic high. He stares up at the ceiling, eyes fluttering shut with the feeling of sleep entering his body. His eyes lazily flutter back open at the feeling of him being watched and he comes face to face her, looking down at him with lust filled eyes. 

“I wanna go again.” 

Negan runs a hand over his face, half sighing half laughing. 

“Again? We already went two times.” She runs a hand along his chest, combing her finger through his chest hair. 

“Please?” Her hand slides up his throat before caressing his cheek, moving her thumb across his cheekbone. He relaxes into her touch, looking up at her softly with his hazel eyes. She leans down and gently pecks him on the lips. 

“You know I can’t say no to you.” She kisses him again, deeper this time, earning a grunt from the man beneath her. He can feel her smiling though the kiss. 

“But I don’t think I have another round in me.” 

“It’s okay,” she straddles his lap, “I’ll do all the work,” she mumbles sleepily.  

She takes his semi-hard length in her hand and lines it up with her entrance before easily sinking down on it. He slides in effortlessly and she feels so good around him. He lets out a sigh of relaxation and his eyes roll back. Using her knees, she slowly lifts herself up off him, so slowly he feels like she’s taunting him. She sinks back down onto him and he hits her g-spot just right. 

“Fuckin’ hell, baby. You’re gonna be the death of me.” He watches her as she rides him, staring at her tits as they bounce in unison with her. His eyes are so full of lust and admiration that he can’t help the sexy dimpled smirk that spreads across his face. Her cunt squeezes around him and he sucks a breath in through his teeth. 

“You gonna come again, aren't you babygirl,” he asks, feeling his own orgasm approaching once again. She nods her head, barely able to keep her tired eyes open, as she increases her pace, moaning his name along with other unintelligible ramblings. They come together one last time before she collapses against his chest. He reaches over for her phone and ends the livestream before tossing it aside. 

“You did so good for me, babydoll,” he whispers soothingly as he rubs his hand up and down her bare back. Her heavy breathing and lack of response tell him that she’s already fallen asleep. He presses a kiss to the top of her head before shutting his own eyes. 

[julieloves074]

Everything (Conrad Fisher x Y/n)

Summary: Y/n had won the battle against cancer at the age of ten but no one expected it to come back. When the truth comes to light the perfect summer crashes down around them. Especially for Conrad, Y/n is his love, his life, his everything

Warnings: Cancer, sadness, swearing, angst 

Words: 7.4K

(Not my GIF :))

Summer in Cousins was the one time of year I felt truly free, nothing really mattered there. Then again, everything mattered there. Belly liked to say nothing existed outside of summer, all the other seasons were just a pass by for it, and I couldn’t argue with her.

This was exactly why I wanted one last perfect summer. Mom told me that I wasn’t being fair, that this was going to be worse for everyone but wasn’t I allowed to be selfish? For once? I knew she couldn’t see it the way I did. I wanted Belly to have her first summer of real fun without having to worry about me. I wanted to see Jeremiah and Steven act stupid all summer without feeling like they needed to slow down for me. I wanted to see Conrad to be happy for one more summer, with me.

And everything was going so well, for the most part. Just like any other summer there was drama: Belly with her new friend Cam Cameron and Jeremiah, Steven with Taylor and Shaila but it was our kid problems, nothing more than that until tonight.

“Y/n you are not allowed to go!” My mother shouted as I made my way downstairs at eight o’clock.

“Stop babying me for God’s sake! I’m telling you I feel fine, I’ll be back in a couple of hours!” I screamed back, I just wanted to go to a party with my friends, I knew I had limits now and that I had to be careful. Still, I couldn’t stay locked in forever.

“Y/n you are getting weaker, are you trying to give your father and I a heart attack?” she asked, her voice still raised but there was a falter, it made me turn right around on my heel. There she was, standing on the top step with tears in her eyes. I could feel my own gloss over. I took a deep breath and looked up in an attempt to stop any tears falling, I was only wearing waterproof mascara but still-

“You’re our little girl and we just want to protect you,” Mom said, face flooded now, lowering to sit on the top stair, she was getting more tired now too.

“Mom I’m eighteen, I don’t know if I will make it through chemo this time and I can’t let it make me live in fear. I won’t let it make me hide around my room if this is my last summer,” I said with urgency and plea.

“It’s going to be a long program Y/n, and it’s going to take lots of strength, both physical and emotional but don’t you dare say you are not going to make it. You will beat it. We just don’t want you to get overwhelmed,” Dad’s voice echoed gently as he came out of our kitchen and pulled me into a hug.

“I know-” I paused looking between both of them, my cardigan in one hand and phone in my other, “I’ve signed up for the program and I will fight this cancer again but there’s nothing I can do now but wait around until the first round of chemo begins again, and who knows what I’ll be able to do after it?” I asked, I didn’t know whether I would live, and if I did how long I’d be weak, I didn’t want to miss out on these teenage years.

I felt dad brush his hand down my arm with a sigh, he looked up to mom who shook her head and couldn’t lift her gaze.

“I know, I’m sorry honey, but you know that if anything happens you call us right away, no matt-“ she began, standing up, but I cut her off.

“No matter where I am, no matter what I’m doing and there will be no questions asked,” I finished off for her, she smiled weakly and started making her way down to dad and I.

“Or you call for medical help first depending on what’s happening,” she informed me, at this point she’s said this to me so many times that I have the words tattooed inside my brain.

“I love you guys,” I said as they both squeeze me tightly just before a car horn sounds outside.

“Tell Connie we said hi and ask him to tell his mom we’ll bring that extra table for the barbeque party tomorrow when we come over for dinner,” Mom relayed to me as I slipped on my shoes.

“I will do,” I said quickly opening the door to slide out. I saw him first, Conrad Fisher, sat behind the wheel, his contagious smile and beautifully messy hair. Then I saw them, Belly, Jeremiah and Steven sat in the back all looking at Belly’s phone who sat in the middle, they were all laughing. I couldn’t believe the summer was nearly at it’s end and I got to spend it these wonderful, and slightly annoying, people.

“Omg Y/n you have to see this video Tylor filmed! This girl just found out her boyfriend was cheating on her with her best friend so both she and the best friend chucked milkshakes at him! I’m so glad Taylor filmed this!” Belly exclaimed the second I opened the car door, pushing from up from her seat and shoving the phone in my face, I didn’t even get time to look before she leaned back and sat down muttering “Damn, Harry is not gonna have fun at school this year,”.

We all broke into a laughter, I turned to Connie who had his eyes on me since the moment I got in the car, I started relaying my parent’s message about the chairs and he leant over to kiss me.

“Okay we get it, you guys are in love but we have a party to get to!” Jeremiah exclaimed grabbing on my headrest to lean his body forwards into our space. I let out a laugh pulling away from Conrad.

“I love you,” he mouthed to me, I did the same back before he turned to his focus to the car and reversing in my driveway. The journey to the house party, I didn’t even know who was hosting this one, was filled with laughter and teasing to the point that Belly had actual tears running down her face.

“I am so glad you made me invest into waterproof mascara Y/n!” Belly said running her fingers under her eyes wiping away the tears. I loved having Belly around, another girl was great to have around, her being like a little sister to me. Even though it came with both its ups and downs of siblings like all the clothes she would ‘borrow’ and never give back, but she’s a good kid.

The party is looking well underway when we arrive, there’s flashing, changing lights to be seen through the windows and the music is echoing down the street. Some new trending song is blasting as we walk through the door. Belly quickly runs off to meet some friends she made at the country club, Jere was dragged away by some good looking guy whom he looked more than friendly with leaving me, Connie and Steven to head to the drinks table.

“Are you actually gonna drink with us tonight Y/n/n?” Steven asked leaning a cup in my direction. I really wanted to, I couldn’t express to anyone how much I wanted to fully let loose, drink away my worries for the night. But I couldn’t.

“Nah I’m good,” I tried to play it off cool, but he started play arguing with me.

“Alright let it go Steven,” Con said after a minutes, I lay my hand on his arm in a silent thanks.

“Okay well I’ll leave you loser to it I’ve just spotted Shayla coming in,” he announced already walking backwards to the beautiful girl.

“Are you alright?” Con’s voice pulled me away from the vision of Steven wrapping his arms around her shoulders, he had whispered something in her ear which made her erupt into this blooming, true laugh, they made each other so happy.

“What? Oh, yeah, I’m fine,” I said, pulling on a big smile, it wasn’t exactly a lie. I felt fine, more than fine standing here with him right next to me.

“It’s just you’ve not been wanting to drink, and not to pin you as an alcoholic or anything,” he defends quickly, “But you’re usually first to call shots,” he laughs pulling me closer as some guys come to the drinks table, it still swells my heart, his little tics of jealously and protection.

“I told you, it’s been really bad for my skin recently and I am not sacrificing this,” I reassured pointing to my face, “Plus it’s kind of funny being sober and watching everyone else make fools of themselves,”

“Can’t argue that,” he says, we settle into a comfortable silence, Con wasn’t drinking tonight he was nominated DD, so the two of us had to entertain ourselves sober. We weren’t standing around for too long when Getaway Car by Taylor Swift came on and I dragged him to the little makeshift dance floor in the living room.

We sang to each other as he led our little dance twirling me around every once in a while. Loads of the girls including Belly joined us screaming along to the bridge.

“God you’re perfect you know that? I think I’ll be crazy about you forever,” Con half shouted over the last chorus and I just shook him off with a gentle shove

“I love you,” I said pulling him into a massive hug. The second the song ended we noticed Jere and Steven stood in the doorway calling Con over, some kid was doing flip tricks on the trampoline and in their words ‘It was so sick! He’ll probably actually be sick if he doesn’t take a break!’

Connie was hesitant to leave me for a second, but I pushed him to the boys, they deserved his time as much as I did. I turned to the girls, and we danced to whatever song came on next, and the next and the next. By the fourth or fifth song I started to feel lightheaded.

“I’m just gonna find a bathroom real quick,” I shouted over to Belly tapping her shoulder, someone had turned the music up. She nodded and gave me a thumbs up before tipping the rest of her vodka lemonade in her mouth.

The bathroom downstairs had too long of a cue so I headed for the stairs in the entryway. Was someone turning up the music again or was it just the sound echoing in my head? I held onto the railing, but my legs were starting to feel heavier with each step. I had just managed to reach the landing, I wasn’t sure which door led to the bathroom, so I ambled to the closest door, it was a bedroom. A double bed in the center surrounded by deep blue wallpaper. It felt as though I was in the ocean somewhere, drifting away.

The bed frame was not giving me much support, I lowered myself to the ground, there was a small thud as I hid the wooden panels. I don’t think I let out a sound but before I knew it someone was rushing into the room.

“Y/n what’s going on?” the voice asked, I looked up but my sight was hazy, “Y/n?” the voice repeated, it was Steven taking a few careful steps towards me.

“It’s nothing, I’m fine just a little tired, I think I overheated a little downstairs I should have been drinking more water,” I said attempting to shoo him away with my hands, but in reality, I didn’t want him to leave, I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to get up without him.

“Y/n you’ve been off all summer so cut the bullshit, since when do we lie to each other?” he asked coming closer, his honestly sounded sober.

“My,” I start and feel something bubbling within me, I cried for an hour when I was diagnosed again, then I told myself I wasn’t allowed to again until after summer, I was allowed to be happy and excited for the summer without thinking about- “My cancers back Steven, and I-”

“I’m sorry you what?” Steven asked cutting me off, as if an animated character his jaw actually dropped, he was kneeling next to me in seconds, pulling me into a hug. I shut my eyes wishing that I had left earlier or taken a night off and rested like mom had suggested, “Conrad! Get in here,” Steven shouted repeatedly brushing a hand through my hair.

“What? Y/n? What happened? Steven what happened?” Conrad asked manically flinging himself to meet his body to mine, “Are you okay?” He asked again as he got no answer to his first lot of questions. He brushed his hand down my arm.

“I’m so sorry,” I let out with a sob, shaking my head from side to side, I saw Belly run in confused with Jeremiah behind her. Others seemed to be crowding at the door but Jere quickly shut it firmly, announcing “Nothing to see here! Go grab some alcohol and make out or whatever,” before turning his attention back to me.

Now this was truly my worst nightmare, they were all looking at me, apart from Steven who had curled up and looked at the floor next to me.

“I’m sorry that I ruined our last summer together,” I said

“Y/n what are you talking about, what happened?” Belly asked brushing some hair out of my face.

“It’s back and I- I don’t think it’ll go away this time,” I whisper as if saying it out loud would mean that it was true, that I was hurting everyone around me once again.

“What’s back?” Jere asks nonchalantly at first before a realization hits him “You don’t mean-” at this Belly burst into a wail.

I looked up at Conrad, he was just staring at me, I couldn’t read his reaction at all. I brushed my hands up and down his arms, it was as if he was frozen it time. I needed him to say something, just that action was wearing me out.

“Come on let’s get you home,” Jere said, his eyes red, he was trying to be a voice of reason, be the one who doesn’t break down so he can support the rest of us. When had he become this grown up? “This isn’t a place for a conversation like this,”.

I can’t quite place what emotion was flowing through me as I was basically carried out of the house with one arm around Con the other around Steven. The whole thing seemed in slow motion to me, all the faces in the crowd of my friends and drunk strangers. How many of them realize what’s actually happening and how many of them simply thought I’d gotten hysterically drunk?

The ride back to my house was quiet other than Belly’s phone call to my mom and then Susannah and Laurel letting them know where they were all going. I was ushered into bed by mom and listened to the heartbroken whispers downstairs in the living room under my bedroom.

Mom and Belly were crying, and dad was trying to calm them down. Conrad was adamant to stay with me whilst dad offered to drive everyone else home as they’d all been drinking. When the front door shut, I heard the footsteps that shuffled upstairs.

“Connie,” I said as he walked into my room, his expression filled with sorrow and with the limited lighting of my bedside lamp I could swear he too had tears rolling from his eyes and down his beautiful face.

“You’re okay, you’re going to get better,” he said repeating in quiet whispers, whether he was trying to convince me or himself I was not sure but I let him. I pulled up my duvet and moved slightly to give him space.

He touched my hair, my face, my arms gliding his fingers as if I was made of porcelain. The first time I was diagnosed and fighting cancer I was 10 and whilst everyone was gentle with me then now it felt like a different kind of touch. A mixture of so much love and pain that I would do- give anything to make him better.

“I love you, so so much,” I whispered, pulling one of his arms around me, I wanted to feel him, all of him here in this house, our summer place. I was surprised he hadn’t run, when Con got overwhelmed he always ran, hiding was his protection. If I did anything in my life, helping Connie learn a better way to cope, or to start to was the best thing that I did.

“Don’t say it like that,” he whispered back, his eyes were closed tight shut.

“Like what?” I asked cautiously, somehow, I knew what he was going to say, I brushed my fingers through his soft hair, his pre-summer haircut was always my favorite. It wasn’t too long, not too short, just enough to outline his face and perfectly highlight his eyes.

“Like it’s one of the last times you’ll ever say it,” his voice cracked and I kept running my fingers through his locks, soothing him. It’s funny how I’m the one who this has happened to yet I’m the one who’s been reassuring everyone that everything happens for a reason. Maybe it was because I’d lived enough to know what the purest of happiness was and that I’d experienced honest love even though some never do.

“I love you. I love you. I love you,” I kept repeating as if I was counting stars up in the sky or the little sheep jumping over the fence in hopes of falling asleep. I’d said it so much my mouth had started running dry but if that was the price for having this boy, this kind, loving boy in my arms until my end I’d pay it over and over and more.

Unfortunately, the underlying sour mood was carried into the next morning, when I woke up to the glimpse of summer that danced in through the half open curtain Conrad was still asleep. He usually looked peaceful when he slept but this morning even in his most fragile states his brows were creased and his breathing was heavy and uneven. I watched him, when we get back to Boston nothing will ever be the same, and we only have a week left here in Cousins.

I untangled from his arms. I tended to have more strength in the morning but today I gripped onto the white wooden rail as I ambled downstairs and into the kitchen. Walking past the living room I noticed figures asleep on the couch. I smiled to myself when I saw Jeremiah and the Conklin siblings, they never left last night.

The clock hit seven when I walked into the kitchen, mom sat there with her kindle in hand, cup of coffee in front of her, but she stared unfocused at the device The lines under her eyes were darker than last night, she looked exhausted. Dad was at the kitchen counter prepping some eggs, bacon and sausages, the good old English Breakfast. He too looked as though he hadn’t slept.

“Morning sweetheart,” mom said looking up, her whole expression changed from worry to love, and though she tried to hide it the worry was still there, rooted deeply in her skin. I took a step towards her and she rushed out of her chair to grab me into a tight embrace.

A thousand things I wanted to say sat there pooling in my head because I simply couldn’t get them out.

“Your dad went out last night to get some more breakfast supplies, we’re feeding some unexpected- but most welcome mouths this morning,” she conveyed and I just nodded, my head resting in her neck, “I’ve called Princeton this morning and explained the situation, they said depending on how long the treatment is going to take they may move your enrollment to next year just so you don’t fall too far behind,” mom explained and I watched my dad’s feet shuffle towards us. College was the last thing on my mind, everyone here was.

“We also called the hospital and they’ve decided to start your sessions earlier,” dad said, this forced me to pull back.

“What do you mean?” I asked frantically, “We’ve had the date set for the day after we get back! How can I start my treatment earlier if we’ll still be here?” I questioned.

“We’ll be heading back to Boston tomorrow Y/n” mom conveyed, I took another step back. No! I needed this last week here with these people.

“But we agreed-” I tried to reason, to argue.

“I know sweetheart, but your health is more important to us, the doctors were already weary of letting you have the whole summer here anyway,” dad leaned against the kitchen counter with one hand and the other travelled to his forehead, an attempt to brush the physical signs of fear and worry away.

“We’re your parents Y/n, we just want what’s best,” mom reassured, and I knew they were right, they usually tended to be but that didn’t mean I had to be happy about it.

“The moms have organized a day full of fun and the celebratory barbeque dinner tonight,” Belly, who was now leaning against the doorframe between the living room and the kitchen, said.

“We’re all leaving tomorrow Y/n, we’re going to be there with you every step of the way,” Jeremiah said, his stunning ocean eyes expressing the purest admiration, his one hand was around Belly’s waist. A side of my mouth twisted up in a sly smile. I had predicted this years ago, Con owed me fifty bucks now.  

“Oh my- come here the both of you right now,” I demanded, I took a few steps towards them but they did most of the work.

“I want in too!” Steven, voice all groggy and half asleep, demanded as he jogged towards us. We stood there hugging for longer than we ever have, it was nice and warm.

We all sat around the table playing a round of uno as dad started to make breakfast, mom offered to help to give us the space, she knew we got far too competitive when it came to this game.

I had two cards left, the least out of all when Jeremiah spoke up from next to me, “Connie isn’t taking it well, he went outside at around three in the morning and he just sobbed, I thought you needed to know” his eyes with sympathetic and glossed over.

“I just don’t want him to shut everyone out now,” I said knowing that the boy had a thing for bottling up his emotions until they finally explode. He stayed last night but who knew which was his mood would sway today.

“He’s going to be around, he’ll be here for you, we all will,” Jeremiah reassured.

The day went by faster than anyone wanted, Conrad came down perfectly in time for breakfast, he pulled a chair to sit next to me. Just like his usual self he wanted to be near me, touching me at all times, whether it was his shoulder brushing mine, a hand on thigh or his head on my shoulder. After breakfast we when back to Susannah’s house and sat on their private stretch of beach. Then we competed in a murder mystery game that us kids created when we were twelve. It was actually pretty intriguing even for the moms and dad.

“I can’t believe you kept stored away for six years mom,” Jere said to which Susannah replied with a knowing motherly smile and pulled another clue card.

Then we went to the pier, had ice cream and I absolutely crushed everyone at the arcade games winning most of the challenges, the great showdown occurred yet again even though Laurel banned it all those years ago. Then we headed back for dinner at the beach house, Jere and Steven operated the grill, we all sat around talking and I managed enough energy to play a quick round of water polo in the newly upgraded heated pool.

Through the whole day Conrad was never more than a few feet away from me. He managed to upkeep a smile most of the time, but when he thought I couldn’t see it faltered. I always knew he was a good one.

At around eleven mom and dad headed back home whilst the rest of us cuddled up on the couches to watch some romcom on Netflix. About halfway through Belly decided she wanted popcorn, so we took a pause and Susannah said she wanted to brush my hair. She loved doing both mine and Belly’s hair, we were her honorary daughters so of course I let her. One of the many things I love about her is that no matter the weather, or what was going on she was a ray of sunshine. I don’t mean that she was always happy, but she always held out hope and guided everyone to the other side of any storm cloud.

After the movie had finished and we got a good hour into the titanic most of us were dozing off, Susannah started shooing everyone off to bed. She too went upstairs leaving Conrad and I sat on the sofa. I looked at him as soon as the whole floor was clear. My eyes asked the quiet question, begged the questions.

“Are you sure? Do you feel like you have enough strength?” he asked, and I smiled, my brain scanned through images of this boy as we grew up, side by side and through all of it he stayed true just like his mom.

“What have we been doing for the past four hours if not sitting and laying around?” I asked lifting my brows in a giggle.

He shook his head slightly and half a smirk managed to make it onto his face, “It’s been a long busy day, that’s all I’m saying,” he defended himself.

“I know, but I’m fine I promise, let’s go!” I encouraged lifting from the couch and pulling him up by his arm. It didn’t take much convincing, when he stood, he gave me a long, slow kiss before resting his arm around my shoulder. We fit together perfectly like two pieces of a puzzle finally put together.

We walked down the sandy path towards their private part of the beach, nudging each other and giggling just like the night Conrad first kissed me, just like the night he had asked me to be his girlfriend. Most, if not all our important milestones happened here at the beach house.

“Do you know what?” He asked breaking the silence, even just the sound of his voice was enough to press my body and mind into total peace but also force my heart to beat at an ungodly speed, still after being together for two and a half years.

“What?”

“One day, the day we get married, I’ll scoop you up like this,” he pauses turning to me, I look at him confused for a second as he coddles me in his arms like a princess, I let out a giggle, “and I’ll carry you into this house,” he pointed to the summer house, “then I’ll carry you out back and all the way to the beach and kiss you until the sun goes down and the moon hangs up high in the sky like tonight and never let you go,” he whispered into my ear as we neared the beach.

“Connie,” I began but he shushed me

“I know, I know you don’t like planning that far ahead, but this is non-negotiable, you said we’re allowed one non-negotiable each. You have yours and I have mine,” he said in a manner of fact way, I just laughed and leaned up to kiss him.

“You do know, I know that was all a ruse so that I didn’t have to walk,” I said and he just smiled, “You’re amazing and I love you but please put me down,” I asked, not because I didn’t love to be treated like a princess but because I felt good and I wanted to experience this with him in the way it’s always meant to be.

When we got onto the open part of the beach it was much windier, Con took off his coat leaving him in his jumper and wrapped it around my arms. We listened to the song of the water and watched the waves.

“I can’t believe how lucky I am,” he announced into the night, he’s sat half leaning on his legs.

“Why’s that?” I asked, there were so many things both of us had to be thankful for.

“That I met you, that I have you, that you chose me and let me hold and love you, I think I’m the luckiest man on the planet,” he says, his gaze drifting to the stars above us. Not a single cloud in the sky tonight.

“Do you know what I think is lucky?” I asked laying my head on his shoulder, my eyes getting tired now.

He finally turns to me and smiles, “What?”

“That we both live in Boston,” I said and he shook his head, clearly not what he was expecting. But it was true, our grandparents met at the Cousin’s country club years ago, our grandmothers were friends which then meant our moms were friends, they went to collage together, it was both of their dreams to live in Boston so they moved out there together not expecting to both live in that city for so long but I was so thankful they did because that meant that I got the Fisher boys and Susannah all year round.

It was around the time that we could see the first shades of yellow and orange of the sun that we decided to head back, his sheets were cold but his arms around me were more than enough to keep me warm in the breezy summer night.

The next day mom and dad came round for breakfast, it was a feast ranging from cereal and toast to pancakes with fresh fruits and muffins which Jere and Belly had gone for a morning run for. Just as fast as the breakfast had disappeared, we were all packing up and getting ready to leave.

As I watched the scenery leaving Cousins, I felt guilty that everyone was cutting their trip short, no matter how much they tried to reassure me that it was okay and that they didn’t mind. Still Laurel, Belly and Steven had agreed to say in Susannah’s house in Boston for the week which meant we still got to have that time together before everything went back into motion in September.

*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*

It was a week after the Conklin’s left that I was told I would be better off shaving off my hair now with it being earlier in the process in order to avoid more emotional highs later on which could affect the medication.

I’d agreed on the terms that Susannah would be the one to do it, together we supported and acted for a hair donation charity which turned hair into wigs for children with cancer, so that’s exactly where my hair was headed.

It was a Friday night, which is always Pizza night, whether ordered in or homemade, one week at our house one week at the Fisher’s. It was that night that I was going to shave all the hair off, the thought wasn’t as scary as I remember it being from the first time around, but I would miss it.

I sit with a towel around my shoulders looking at myself in the mirror of the master bathroom, the boys were both sat in there with my mom, Belly was facetiming us and Susannah stood behind me with the scissors, this was harder for her than for me.

Mom held my hand and dad stood in the doorway with a tight smile. Susannah had braided my hair into two braids and after a nervous laughter and whispering ‘I love you’ she cut the first one, the snip of the scissors was loud in my ears as she worked through the thick of one braid. A breath escaped my lips and quickly enough we were on the second braid. Now Conrad held onto my other hand, the corners of his eyes creasing. And then the other was gone too.

In a way it felt like a weight was lifted off me, I mean it literally had been, my head felt lighter, and I was left with uneven scraps all over my head.

“Hey I dig the short hair!” Jeremiah says hand extended to fist bump me, I  felt obliged saying, “Now we know I could steal your hairstyle and still be cooler than you,” I remarked and he pulled a smirk.

“Listen up Y/n/n at least my cut isn’t so uneven,” he laughs

“Well, mine’s about to be more smooth than yours, what you gonna do?” I play intimidated as mom placed my braids into the zip lock bag ready to be posted.

“Some little girl or boy is going to be really happy when they receive that hair you know that Y/n” Susannah said squeezing my shoulders after plugging in the razor. This time I closed my eyes and squeezed Connie’s hand tighter.

When half my head was done, I felt a bit of a breeze but I didn’t want to open my eyes yet, I’ve said many times that hair wasn’t a determining factor in my life but at the end of the day it was a part of me.

“All done,” Susannah said and I could hear a fragile smile in her words, I nodded with my own smile.

Then after a second the sound of the razor when off again and my eyes shot open, before I could stop it I saw Connie’s soft, brown hair falling from his head. He has run a strip right in the middle of his hair.

I leaped out of the stool. But it was too fast, everything around me started spinning slightly and my knees had gone weak. I grabbed the counter in front of me and both mom and Jeremiah leaned forward for support.

“I’m okay,” I say after a second, I closed my eyes and steadied myself, what was actually a matter of a minute felt like hours, but then I was stood again with another reminder: slow.

“Connie what were you thinking?” I asked incredulously and he was just shaking his head smiling, a glimpse of tears in his eyes.

“I’m in this with you, I told you I would be here every step of the way and I will,” he stood right in front of me, his deep blue eyes staring right into my soul, how had I been so lucky to have been granted the love of this boy and everyone else in this room. I pulled him into a tight embrace, retaining his warmth, his touch.

Jere jerked taking the turned off razor out of his brother’s hand and worked it through his own hair. This time everyone gasped, Jeremiah loved his hair.

“Never have I ever thought I’d see that happen. Jere, you obsess over your hair, you love it!” Belly expressed through the phone, now Steven was leaning over her shoulder.

“Yo- you lot are brave!” he exclaimed with laughter; this was how he processed grief. He made jokes and laughed because otherwise it was much too bare, I didn’t blame him, in fact I found it comforting.

“I love my hair but you mean much more Y/n” Jere announced turning back to me and I couldn’t help but let the tears roll down my face now, pulling Jere to join the hug. He will be exactly the one for Belly, he’ll treat her well. I was sure of it.

Now it was my turn to sit on the edge of the tub, Susannah’s arm around me as we watched both her boys get their heads shaved by my mom.

“Well now we’re all gonna look like weirdos every time we leave the house,” I laughed looking at dad.

“And we’re gonna look like some cult parents who forced their kids to shave their heads,” he added back laughing

“I mean we could shave yours too David,” Susannah added, “Then we’ll confuse the narrative,”

“Only if your hair is next,” he challenged and I squeezed Suze’s hand, I would never let anyone come near her beautiful, golden hair.

“I think we’ve shaved enough heads for one day,” mom announces pulling the razor momentarily from Jere’s head, “Remember we have that dinner reservation in like two hours and I’d like to get changed from these sweats and t-shirt,” she goes back to Jere’s hair but before she’s able to make any progress she turns back around again, “Actually that’s a lie I could live in this outfit for the rest of my life I’m just not sure the people at the restaurant would appreciate it,” she says and every in the room laughs.

*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*

The hospital room I’d been in for the past week and a half has become a familiar sight, considering that I’ve only left it to go to other similar looking rooms in the hospital. I look at the clock, its five in the afternoon, I must have fallen asleep again. The November chill was visible outside by the frost on the other side of the glass.

On the other side of the room behind the wall I hear mom talking to someone, dad has gone to work for the day, they’ve started switching days, so I can only guess it’s Susannah or the boys.

“It’s been getting worse,” her voice quivers and a part of me wishes I could mute her out, still be asleep. I know the truth, a part of me has known it since I found out the cancer came back those couple of weeks before we departed for Cousins that summer, I wasn’t going to get better.

“There must be something they can do,” another voice said, this time my body hauled me up a little. Conrad. I’ve been letting him visit me, he wanted to be here all the time but I asked Susannah to pace him. He was here this morning. It was meant to be one visit a day.

I know that makes me sound horrible, and it makes my own heart shatter piece by piece but it wasn’t because I didn’t love him or because I didn’t want him to be here. I knew there would be a time where he would have to move on, life would continue and he has such a bright future ahead of him, so many people to meet and experiences to be had. In my head if the distancing started now maybe it would be easier for him, even still the image of him with any other girl made me feel sick.

“Is she awake?” Is what I hear when I break out of thought.

“She wasn’t when I left to get changed and grab some food, but it’s been a couple of hours so she should be waking up soon if you want to go in,” mom said and I silently battled with the thought of pretending to still be asleep.

Before I had the time to make the choice the door was opening and then Conrad’s and my eyes met and he was coming to sit next to my bed, quickly pulling his hand into mine.

He bought a bag of games with him, we started with some card games, then snake and ladders, then four in a row and so on for a couple of hours. I was glad he came for the second time today.

“What?” He asked, I was staring at him but it wasn’t like he wasn’t staring back

“No nothing, just wondering how I managed to score such a hot boyfriend,” I say fanning myself with one hand, “And he’s a teddybear and sweetheart.” I added and watched him cringe at my words.

“I’m the one who should be asking how I managed to get a girlfriend as stunning and kindhearted as you,” he said but I just rolled my eyes. As much as we did this over the top thing as a joke we both knew we meant the words.

We talked and talked that night, he held my hand through it all. I didn’t realize how late it was but mom had come to sit in the corner of the room, she’d been having trouble sleeping recently but she’d managed to snooze off.

“I love you so much Connie, I’m thankful for you everyday, never ever change,” I whispered holding back a sob, he was half asleep on his chair next to my bed too.

“I love you too,” he said leaning up to kiss me gently. Then Connie and I whispered to each other until I too was fading away into sleep.

*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*

Conrad’s POV:

I never thought I’d be stood here, looking at all these people and her picture in front of a casket. I took that photo the day I asked her to be my girlfriend on Cousins beach, all her teeth were shining pearly white and her hair was blowing in the wind framing her face like a masterpiece statue or a goddess.

“I think you all know that Y/n meant more to me than anything and anyone in my life, alongside my family. We grew up with each other. We were there for each other in the good and bad times even before we were together romantically. She is- was- one of the most integral pieces of the puzzle of our lives. I think I can speak on behalf of our families,” I pause, tears rolling down my face, and a sob building up in my throat, “I don’t know how I will be able to go day by day without seeing her, hearing her voice and her passion. She inspired me more than anyone and I will love her until the day I die and even further into whatever comes after death, I will do everything in my power to make sure all her goals for the many charities and organizations are complete, I will build a new charity in her name, I will make sure she gets the remembrance she deserves, because- because more than anyone I know she deserved all happiness and love. She will be missed more than I could ever have the words to express” I finished and turned to the casket, “Please don’t leave me, come back to me,” I whispered.

There was more I wanted to say, I could speak about her for days and nights on end, about how wonderful and bubbly and kind she was and yet I couldn’t. These faces in the crowd, some knew her better than others but no one like our little families, Belly, Jere and Steven were all sat next to each other crying. Mom was holding her arms around Y/n’s mom and dad as they stared at me, thankful for my words.  

I broke into tears too, leaning onto the stand in front of me for support. Mom rushed towards me now, holding me close and helping me down to the seats. There I sat numb, tears flowing as the pastor finished the ceremony after which we all filed out and watched her get lowered into her grave. It read ‘Y/n L/n. Daughter, friend, love. An inspiration to all’

I can’t believe it’s been two weeks since I was holding her hand the night she passed. Two weeks since I’ve lost my everything.

Masterlist

[rosielovesspence]

I have a request. This is my first time but k love your stories. Okay what if reader is 23 and she is the secret Blossom daughter anyways she is also dating FP and she gets super jealous of Alice (who I’m sorry don’t like) anyways what if she gets down and sees maybe FP would do better without her but he changes her mind? With some smut?!! Hehehe ahh I’m so excited

I am so sorry this took so long 😭 I so forgot about it, I'm so sorry hun!!! (Also dw I totally hated Alice too) (Also I totally forgot about the Blossom's secret child so idk how they treated them, I ain't watched the show in a bit so just pretend I added that to the story) also it became MOSTLY SMUT tbh

F!reader x FP Jones

Alice Cooper was highly unlikable. Always being around FP because of her daughter and his son was one thing, the way she constantly nagged everyone else was another reason. But you didn't need many reasons to dislike her, your first reason was well enough. She was always around your man FP. At first it was a mild annoyance, and soon it was every second.

So you decided you felt stupid. You kept your distance from FP, you were absolutely downed, thinking about breaking up with him so he could go date Alice, it made sense after all, you were a bit young. Keeping your distance worked well at first, for the first two days he was too busy to notice, but after a while he was calling all the time, showing up unexpectedly, he was trying to find out what was wrong. "Honey, you gotta talk to me, you can't hide forever." He mumbled while he was standing in front of you at your job. "I'm not hiding, nothing's going on, go spend time with Alice."

Okay, so maybe your sadness and insecurity fronted themselves as anger. You had snapped at him and he looked like a kicked puppy for a second before his eyes glimmered with recognition. "Oh, dear, is that what's wrong?" You just turn to the clock, hoping to check the time until you leave. "Five minutes." FP says quickly, already knowing you well enough. "And as soon as you're clocked out you're coming home with me."

And so with barely any room to argue, that's exactly what happened, once you clocked out he took you home with him. You felt absolutely stupid, sitting on the edge of his bed while he stood in front of you, looking down at you. "Look, i-" you couldn't even finish, as he quickly sank to his knees right in front of you. "No." He said quickly pressing a kiss to your right leg. "No?" You asked and he nodded, kissing further up your leg, gently spreading your legs before sucking a hickey into your inner thigh.

"Yes, I said no." He turned his attention to your other leg, kissing, licking, and nipping hickeys into your pretty skin. "You don't even know what I was about to say." Your sentence comes out breathy, stutter filled as you try your best to not become absolutely soaked at the sight before you. He just looks up at you for a moment before speaking, "I know exactly what you were gonna say," his tone is harsh, strict, and absolutely sexy, "it was gonna be about Alice, and I don't wanna hear it."

His tone alone has you ready to give up your endeavors, he stands up in front of you however and you decide to keep pushing. "FP-" you're quickly cut off again, his rough lips against yours, hands roughly grabbing at your hips. "No more talking." He mumbles against your lips. You again decided to push your luck, leaning back to protest but the second you even tried to speak he gently pushed you down onto the bed. "No more talking." He repeats, tone much more strict than before, if it's even possible it made you wetter too. "Now, do I gotta fuck this little idea out of your head or are you a smart girl who can get rid of it yourself?" That was a comment no one else could possibly get away with, but FP was different, his condescending tone was something laced with sweetness somehow.

"Need your help." You mumbled, and he smiled, hands gently rubbing your thigh. "Good girl." Was his reply, leaning down to kiss you as his hand slowly travelled up your leg. It went past your inner thigh and slowly his fingers pressed against your panties, the wet fabric making him smile as he pushed them aside, fingers teasing your clit. "Good girl, so ready for me." He praised, slowly sinking two fingers into you, watching your nose scrunch in pleasure as you let out small whines. He continued to plunge his fingers in and out of you, watching you moan beneath him. "Good girl, look at your pretty face, the only face I wanna see."

He sped up his fingers, making you let out a high pitched squeal of pleasure. "There it is, oh, that's my favorite sound. Something no one else could achieve." You couldn't even reply, on the brink of crying at his praise, he was slowly making the insecurity fall away. Who else could ever imagine he'd be in love with another woman while he's saying such things about you? And soon you feel that coil snap, and you hear more praise. "Oh, just dirtying my fingers, aren't ya? Mhm, doing so good." He coos, praise making your head spin as his fingers come up and he sucks your juices off of them like the sweetest nectar.

"Think you can handle anymore?" Always the gentleman, making sure you're ready for him completely. Making sure to give you time, you nod and he smiles softly. Taking off your panties completely he flips your skirt up, looking down at the prettiness that is you, leaning down to kiss you once more before leaning back again, undoing his belt.

That had been hours ago, he was still plunging into you, moaning at your tight walls around him. "Good girl, my only girl, only girl I want." You whined at such words, face buried in a pillow while he held your hips up to fuck you from behind. "Taking me so good, the only girl that could take me this good" he praised. "Only girl that could make me want you this much, only girl so irresistible." His praises were mixed with your whined of pleasure, his small grunts of pleasure. He finished with one thrust, filling you up, smiling down at your shaking form.

"Good girl." He praised sweetly, kissing your shoulder, pulling out and laying you in a more comfortable position. "My girl, my only girl." He praised, peppering soft kisses across your face. "Ready to give up your silly idea?" You nodded, cuddling against him and laying your face against his chest. "Yeah, it was really stupid anyway." He smiled broadly, "ain't that the truth." He kissed you once more before you fell asleep. Happy and content in the arms of a man who you were now certain, was yours and only yours.

[novashelby]

Just Breathe-A Jonathan Crane x Fem!Reader Smut MDNI. 18+

Pairing: Jonathan CraneXFem!Reader-Patient

Prompt: I used number 65

Warnings: Mentions of depression and anxiety, medication, use of drugs, dub-con. Fingering (f receiving). Age gap? Reader is unknown adult age, but Jonathan is older.

Summary: Dr. Crane's patient has been having a hard time climaxing after taking a SSRI. So, he gives her an experimental drug to help her climax.

Word Count: 3.7k

A/N: This is a request by @futurefamousdeadmusician. They had given me the prompt, but allowed me the creative freedom. I hope you enjoy it. :) Please comment and reblog. Likes are kind, but I'd really appreciate if you can at least reblog. Rebloging allows an author's work to circulate.

She wasn’t his usual type of patient; small and meek. A simple diagnosis of general anxiety. Nothing a little pill couldn’t fix. The previous appointment he pulled out his pad and wrote down a low dose prescription of sertraline. Something he often started patients on. And so, when she came in the next appointment with a very typical problem, he was not surprised. Dr. Crane took off his dark rimmed glasses and leaned back, one leg crossed over the other. He listened intently and with genuine interest, watching her fiddle with the fraying hems of her sleeves. Many assumed he was all arrogance and no compassion. That was hardly the truth. Dr. Crane cared quite deeply about his patients. Perhaps just in a different way. 

“Are you nervous?” he asked, eying her picking at loose threads. Her fingernails scraped and pulled, causing balls of lint to flutter on the ground. His eyes watched as they drifted in the air. “You seem on edge.” It wasn’t anything new in her case; on edge and small. Though, the twitching in her wrist was new. She swallowed, stopping the shaking in her knee. Looking up at him, she took a deep sigh. 

“Mike and I had our first intimate date,” she said with a crooked, unsure smile. 

Curious, he arched his brows. “And how did that go? Michael…the boy from your university course, correct?” He wrote it down in his notebook for future reference. 

Shrugged, she winced a bit and shyly responded, “it didn’t…it didn’t go anywhere.” Her cheeks turned a shameful rosy red and she averted her attention off the side. It was not an unusual side effect. In fact, it was almost expected with SSRIs at this point. Dr. Crane noted in his file; the patient is struggling with intimacy-possible side effects from medication. “He was getting frustrated with me. I couldn’t…couldn’t…finish?” she questioned, looking back up at him. Poor girl looked so ashamed and embarrassed, her cute bottom lip pouting out. 

“I see,” he said, thumb playing with the pen in his hand. Click. Click. Click. “Well, it is a normal response to the medication. Lower libido and difficulty reaching climax. Have you tried to talk to Michael about this?” 

She shook her head. “Hasn’t answered any of my texts.”

Dr. Craned sighed and offered a consolidating smile. “I’m sorry.”

“Dr. Crane, am I just going to be like this everyday for the rest of my life?” she asked after a random moment of silence. It took him by surprise when she stood, taking a deep inhale and holding it before letting it out with a stream of words. “I just…I feel so fucking useless!” His eyes followed as she passed about the small, dimly lit office. “Like I can’t function. For one fucking day.” Pausing, she turned on her heels and faced him, eyes peering down. “Like, it isn’t possible, right? No one can possibly be like this forever, right?” Dr. Crane put aside his notes and stood. Perhaps it was a little unprofessional, but he gently put his hands over her arms, thumbs running circles. It took her a second to come in focus, but when she did, she looked into his eyes and asked, “Dr. Crane, I want to feel human-”

“You feel nothing, but human,” he responded, gently. “Being human is feeling anxious, scared, happy, nervous. Don't worry.” His hand went up to her cheek. “We can adjust your medication and change the dosage. I can…hmm.” He stopped mid thought when it hit him. “There is something I could try. Would you mind grabbing your belongings? We will actually head to the examination room-no, no, nothing at all to be afraid of.” The girl shivered in his arms, hesitating at the threshold of the door. He flicked off the lights and had to rest his hand on her lower back to shimmy her out. “We will go downstairs. Ah!” He walked over to the check in desk. “Linda, I will need you to cancel my appointments, and why don’t you take the rest of the day?”

Linda, the aging receptionist, took a moment to realize she was getting a free afternoon. In glee, she said, “oh, of course, Dr. Crane. Thank you!” 

He nodded. “Just remember to cancel those appointments and reschedule for Friday. I’ll switch around my shift at Arkham.” His eyes drifted back to the nervous girl, still fiddling with her sweater sleeves. “Just this way,” he whispered, smiling down at her. “Be Careful going down the steps. They’re a bit steep.” And he was right. She felt one wrong step and she would tumble down. Gripping the wooden railing, she climbed down sideways. Unlike Dr. Crane, who knew each step as if he had them mapped out in his brain. 

When they both reached downstairs, he flicked on a light. When her eyes adjusted, she was surprised to see a rather modern examination room; marble floor, medical bed, and metal cabinets. “Do you often bring patients down here, Dr. Crane?” Her eyes scanned the room when she saw four straps on the bed. She hated to admit it, but her brain instantly went to serial killer. He chuckled, placing a hand on her shoulder. 

“Don’t worry,” he said, as he was walking to a cabinet, unlocking it with a set of keys. “Those aren’t for you. Sit on the gurney please. I have to get you a waiver.” His fingers skimmed over the packets before pulling out a single piece of paper. “Ah! Here we are! No need to fear, it is only precautionary and customary.” Handing her the pen, he prompted her to sign it. Her fingers lingered over the pen, hesitantly taking it to sign.

“What are we going to do?” she asked, brows knitted.

He smiled, and cupped her cheek. “I will explain it to you in a moment, but I’d like you to sign it first. Just in case.” She nodded and skimmed over the words, not registering anything before shoving it back to him. Dr. Crane had never given her a reason not to trust him. “Good girl.” Good girl? A lump formed in the back of her throat as those words did something to her. His whole demeanor changed. The way he spoke was smooth and less professional and clinical. And this ascertain possessiveness clung to the words good girl. When she embarrassingly looked away, his hand was back at her cheek, pushing her to look at him. He was closing the gap between them. “Have I ever given you a reason not to be safe with me? Have I not always done what was right for you? Hm? You will be trying a new drug.” 

“A new drug?” she asked, wincing. “Shouldn’t I withdraw from the other one? Has it been tested? Approved by the FDA?” Ignoring her questions, he simply chuckled and pinched her chin before turning his back going to another file cabinet. Out he pulled a syringe and a vial filled with a purple liquid. 

“It’s a new erectile dysfunction treatment for men,” he explained, turning his head up to draw a syringe. “But it hasn’t been tested on a woman yet, and perhaps I am a bit curious. It won’t hurt you. I’m just curious if it will work.” He turned back to her, the syringe now filled with the purple liquid. She hated shots, but started to roll up her sleeve. “I’ll give you a lesser dose,” he lied, smirking to himself. It was a higher dose mixed with many other components that were known to mess with a woman’s senses.”

“I hate shots,” she explained, showing him her bare arm. 

Dr. Crane chuckled, and said, “actually, it doesn't go in your arm. Rest. Lie on your back.” When she went to open her mouth, he explained, “it goes in your upper thigh. I’ll need to take off your pants. Is that alright?” She contemplated for a second, eyes looking back to the restraints. Have I ever given you a reason not to be safe with me? She started to slide off the gurney, mumbling about how her session was over and how she needed to get home. Dr. Crane’s cool, collected exterior tensed, and the hands that were once gently touching her, were rougher. “Ah, ah, ah. You know the expression that a doctor knows best.” He grabbed her upper arms and pushed her back down.

“Dr. Crane,” she said, mustering up the courage to sound a bit more curt and direct. “I’d like to go home, please.” He wouldn’t budge, eyes peering down at her. The syringe was right there wedged between his index and middle finger.

He slowly smirked, noticing how she kept looking at the restraints. He could read her easily. Knowing what was traveling through her mind, he whispered seductively in her ear. “I will use those if I have to, but if you are a good girl, I won’t. So, please, rest.” He eased her back down on the gurney and guided her to lay flat down. “I’m a doctor,” was his explanation for playing with the button on her pants. “This is nothing short of clinical for me.” Though it was true in a sense, it was still all erotic to him. Having a young woman so helplessly at his mercy in the name of his experiments, He was sure that she wouldn’t last his fear toxin, but luckily for her, he enjoyed a dabble in other areas. Including that of an arousal drug used for men. It wasn’t his, however, but a colleagues….He was simply using it as a side project in benefit of having his name on another paper. Her legs squeezed shut, preventing the ease of pulling them down, Jonathan laughed. “Come now,” he tisked, sliding a hand between her thigh and pulling them apart with ease. 

“It’s just a little uncomfortable,” she said, looking up at him with these pathetic doe-like eyes. Oh, how he had to fake sympathy; lip pouting and head tilted. Awww, I know. It is all so scary. Tell me exactly what you are fearful of? Swallowing, her eyes glanced over at the brown leather straps. “You’ll kill me.”

“How silly,” he said. “What use would I have of you then? Dead? Ah, you young women and your obsession with the grotesque and morbid. Would you believe I am actually helping you?” His cool fingers hooked around the waistband of her jeans and pulled down to her knees. Grabbing an alcohol wipe, he cleaned a small patch near the pelvic area instead of the thigh, where he originally said. When the needle came in closer, she winced, trying to push away slightly. Jonathan pulled away, frowning. His other hand reached out and caressed her cheek. In the softest voice, he cooed, “I know, baby, I know. I’m right here, just breathe.” When the word baby laced within his sentence, she felt an ache in her stomach. It was mixed with sickness and…and that odd sensation that young girls get when they notice their first crush. Almost like a cramp and tingle. Baby? Her eyes glossed as she eased for him. “Good girl. Now, it won’t even hurt…ah! See?! So distracted, you hardly felt the tiny prick, sweetheart.” He was right, she hardly felt the prick. 

“What will happen now?” she asked, watching the ceiling. 

“You may feel a bit warm,” he explained, tossing the syringe and gloves away in a red bin for hazards. Instead of allowing her to leave, he took a seat on the stool, and watched her. “For men, they start to feel a bit of a tingle. An uncontrollable urge, if you will. Of course,” he paused, grinning at her. “An erection and if the sex is of standards, a very satiable climax. However! This is the first time it’s been tested on a female, but I expect the results to be on par-”

“W-what?” she asked, embarrassed. “Dr. Crane. I will do that here?”

Brows arched, he asked, “had you not read the waiver form thoroughly? I’m a bit disappointed, sweetheart. However, yes, you will go through the full trial here.” 

She tried to sit up, but got a bit dizzy and laid back down. “B-but in front of you?”

“It’s all clinical,” he explained. “But, because you hadn’t read the waiver, I want to reinforce that you should allow your body to feel exactly what it wants to feel. That you should relax into the urges and intrusive thoughts. Suppressing it will only make you worse. How are you feeling?” She hummed, wiggling her hands and feets. 

“Just a bit warm is all,” she explained, turning to glance at him, finding it funny that he wasn’t writing anything down. He wasn’t observing her as she imagined a doctor conducting an experiment. Instead, he was simply staring. When she went to sit up, that is when an overwhelming cold sweat hit her, knocking the breath from her lungs. “Shit,” she cursed under breath, closing her eyes. She wasn’t only warm, but hot. Almost like a dripping fever. 

“It’s only sixty-five in here,” he pointed out, amused. “It’s alright…how does your mouth feel?”

“Dry,” she croaked out, feeling her tongue turn to sandpaper. Sweat was forming at her temples and her heart was racing in a way she never felt. 

“Would you like some water?” he asked, sliding from the stool and walking to the sink. He filled a plastic cup with some water and turned to her, dipping his fingers in the cup. “Open your mouth…ahhh, good girl.” He dipped his fingers in her mouth, and there was something in her that turned absolutely feral. Intrigued, he observed how she reached up and hungrily sucked at his fingers, tongue swirling. She refused to let them go, whining when he pulled them away. “Your eyes are quite hazy,” he teased, pressing his fingers against her neck to feel her rising pulse. Her inhibitions were going down, he noted, and watched as whatever she was feeling turned into a survival need. She was hungry for something and she couldn’t comprehend. Sitting up a bit, mouth wide open and tongue out like a bitch in heat. She followed his hand before sucking in his fingers. Bobbing her head, she moaned as if she was pleasuring his cock. “The need for oral stimulation,” he commented before asking, “how hot are you out of ten?” Funny enough, she put up her fingers instead of releasing him. Eight. “Hmm, I see…there you go, sweety. You can take them deeper if you wish….” And she did, pushing them down her throat, choking and drooling over them. His trousers started to tightened as she was falling right where he wanted her. “Now, I must ask. If you are hot, why are you wearing your sweater? Hm? And jeans? That seems a bit stupid, doesn’t it?” She nodded, pausing her sucking. He pulled his hand away and she let out a long whine. “Then what should you do, hm?” Without much prompting, she took off her sweater and tossed it to the ground and kicked off her jeans along with her shoes. Slowly, he grinned, eyes meeting with her black bra. It wasn’t anything special. Very simple, but the way it was definitely a cup too small and her breasts were pooling out made him push her down. 

“I need,” she gasped out, not believing her own words. But she didn’t stress too much because anytime she fought the thoughts, her head banged. She looked up at him with desperate hooded eyes and her hands grabbed for his hands. “I need…I need….”

“Need what?” he asked, amused. “Hmm, I need you to be very specific.” 

A long belly deep whine left her drying lips. “Dr. Crane, stop. I need, I need it…something. Anything.”

“Hmm,” he hummed, his hand resting on her thigh and inching up. “And how do you feel down here, hm?” He hadn’t expected her to let out a growl and grab for his belt. “Hey!” he scolded, grabbing her hand.  “I’m your doctor,” he teased, hand resting against her panty covered cunt. “Wet…pooling. Ah, you must feel so needy and tingly down here, don’t you?” Desperately, she nodded, pouting, hands still attempting to grab for his belt. “Hey, hey…come on. I’m a professional. I would never. Back down. Ah! Good girl.” He walked over to the cabinet and got a clean glove before walking back over. “Let’s test the severity of this. If I wasn’t aware of your situation, I may have just assumed you were rabid.” He went to pull off her panties, but she beat him to it, kicking them off and propping her legs up. “What a diligent patient,” he commented, pulling up the stool. “Yes,” he nodded, looking over her wet folds. “Your labia appears to be puffy.” When he gave her outer lips a quick pinch, her hips jolted up. “Did you know,” he said, dragging out his words. “That the clitoris is much more than this little nub.” It spread her dripping pussy open with his ring and index finger while his middle rubbed gentle circles over her clit. 

Her eyes rolled in the back of her head as she felt this teasing sensation just barely pressing down on her throbbing, aching clit. “O-ohhh,” she moaned out, clenching her vagina walls, desperate for something to fill her. To ease the tension he was making worse, she subconsciously grinded her hips against his finger. “Please-”

“How nice of you to remember your manners,” he teased, pressing harder, rubbing in taunting circles with a constant pace. His eyes watched how her vagina clenched. She was needy for something and he wanted nothing more, but to fill her. He imagined for a moment how he’d take her; bent over, hips slamming into her ass. His hands would be squeezing her beautiful breasts while his mouth would be kissing her ear, whispering all the sinful things. She was white knuckled at the paper thin sheet covering the hospital bed. “Relax,” he told her. “You're trying too hard for release…let it come natural.” She released the sheet and went to her breasts, rubbing and pinching her swelling nipples. 

“Doctor!” she gasped out, hips buckling as she was teetering on the edge of a climax. “It’s been so long, please.” He pulled away his hand and slapped her thigh, pulling her out of her high. She cried, slapping her hands against her face. “Why!?” She was almost angry at him, her eyes glaring his way. But it was all too funny to him. She was still sweating and trying to catch her breath. 

“Tell me exactly what you want,” he said. “Doctor needs to take his notes.”

She swallowed, lip pouting. “To cum. I want to cum. It’s been too long and…and I just-please!” 

“I see,” he said, nonchalantly. “And if you could cum in any way, what way would you like to cum? Sorry, it is all clinical.”

She went to grab for his belt again, but he pulled away reminding her to use her big girl words. “Your…your cock. I want it. I want to ride it-”

“No,” he reminded, leaning into her face with a crooked smile. “I’m your doctor. Don’t you remember? I worked too hard for my license to lose it over fucking a desperate little girl like yourself.” She frowned, feeling an overwhelming sensation of depression. “Shh, it’s okay. Perhaps I don’t always have to be your doctor, but in this room, right now, I am…But! We can continue our finger examination.” He moved from the stool and sat on the examination bed. “Come here.” He barely got the words out before she climbed on him. With two fingers, he eased into her and pumped gently while his thumb rubbed her clit. She was resting over his legs, wiggling and grinding down on his hand. “Go on, it’s your job now.”

“Thank you, doctor,” she moaned out, closing her eyes. He warned her to start easy and allow the pleasure to build. It’d be more pleasurable and satisfying that way, was his rationale. And to his surprise, she did. Little whimpers filled the room as she slowly raised her hips to roll them over his fingers. With one hand, she braced herself on his shoulder and the other played with her breasts, pinching and rolling her nipples. He smiled, his tongue swiping across his bottom lip.

“Are these sensitive?” he asked, pinching it with his other hand.

“Y-yes, doctor,” she cried out, fucking his fingers a bit harder, bouncing while the sensation built up.  “F-fuck,” she cried out, his thumb doing the devil’s work…or perhaps, an angles work? He pressed hard, rubbing circles and flicking it. His hand matched the speed she went. “S-hit, shit,” she whined, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing her face in the crook. “D-doctor!” Something sinister built in her core. Something so beautiful that she hadn’t felt in such a long time….And she was not going to lose it. She grinded harder to the point there was just a little pain that sent her over the edge. 

“Good girl,” he cooed. “You’re so wet. Are you normally a squirter? I can feel my pants soaking….” She could only answer in an array of moans and grunts. Nothing comprehensible. “You’re going to cum for me, pretty girl. Good girl.” When she went over the edge, she cried out in a silent scream, eyes rolling back. Bucking her hips, she let loose a stream of squirt. Not only soaking his pants, but his shirt. He wanted it all. Her orgasm was washing over her, but he was convinced she had just a little bit more in her. He released her clit, but continued to rub against her gspot. 

“Oh fuck!” She started to kiss against his jaw line. Between them, she let out words that hardly made any sense. A mix of admiration and desperation for the doctor. “T-too much…too much!” He was pushing her past her climax, and it consumed her, overwhelming all her senses. 

“Let a little more out,” he told her. “I know you-ah! Good job!” As he was about to finish his sentence when she lifted her hips and squirted a pool below her. Taking away his hand, he brought it up between their faces. With a pleased smirk, he sucked off the juices, and said, “it’s all clinical.”

[wzrd-wheezes]

Coffee, Cake and a Gossip - James Potter x Reader

AN - this is entirely based off of a scenario where my boyfriend took me for coffee and cake so we could gossip.

warnings: mentions of alcohol briefly but that’s about it. james potter loving a gossip

Y/N pushed the scrambled eggs around with her fork as she spoke, her eyes trained on the fading pattern of the plate as the words tumbled out of her mouth.

“-And it’s just like, I don’t know, I don’t know how many more times I have to tell her before it gets through.” she huffed, setting her fork down with a clatter, “I’m sorry. I know you probably don’t want to hear me moaning about my friend drama again.”

James laughed, taking a slurp of coffee from his mug, “You’re not moaning, my love.” he smiled, “You’re just venting and, in the nicest way possible, I am loving the drama.”

Y/N chuckled, looking up for the first time in a good few minutes. James was sat, patient as ever, staring lovingly at her as she recounted the events from the previous night.

“Yeah, I know but it must be getting old now,” she smiled weakly, standing up. She crossed the kitchen to scrape her plate clean before setting it in the sink.

Light on his feet, James appeared behind her, his big arms wrapping around her shoulders, his chin resting on the top of her head. He pressed a kiss to her temple, one hand sliding down to rest on her waist. He pushed the fabric of her pyjama top upwards, forever a fiend for skin on skin contact.

“I have an idea.” he mumbled into her hair.

“Yeah?” Y/N hummed in response, sudsing up the sponge and beginning to wash the pots from that morning’s breakfast.

“How about we go and get ready, then we can drive to a cute little cafe somewhere and we can go for coffee, cake and a gossip.” he spun her around so that she was facing him, taking her soapy hands in his, “Then, you can tell me all about your friend drama because, to be honest, ever since you went out with them last night I’ve been dying to hear about what happened.”

“Really?” Y/N slipped her hands from his and wiped them dry on a tea towel that was tucked into a drawer, “You’re sure that you actually-”

“Baby. I cannot explain to you how much I would love to hear it. Besides, I’m a sucker for a little sweet treat.” He grinned, “Why don’t you go and get ready and I’ll finish cleaning up down here, yeah?”

James drove them to a café on the outskirts of their town. It was a quiet little place where sunlight streamed in through the windows and the walls were adorned with quirky paintings. Y/N went to find a table while James ordered. She found them a spot tucked away in the corner, two overstuffed armchairs and a small table between them.

Their coffee was served in mismatched mugs, steam rising from the surface as James set them down on the scrubbed wooden table. He disappeared for a moment and returned with two large slices of cake.

“I didn’t know which to get so I just got a slice of each and thought we could share.” he explained, hacking into a slice with his fork.

“Good thinking.” Y/N smiled, picking up the hot mug and clasping it in her hands.

“Okay. Coffee and sweet treats acquired… time to gossip.” he wiped the crumbs from his lips and turned to face her properly, giving her his full attention.

“So, obviously I haven’t seen the girls for a while, y’know, with us all working and whatnot,” Y/N began. She picked up a sugar cube from the bowl and dropped into into her coffee with a plop, “And I thought it would be nice for us all to go for a drink somewhere so I booked us in at this cute little wine bar in town.”

“Ooh, was it good? We should go there next date night.”

“It was so good! We get there and we all get our drinks and one of the girls says that Alice is running late and I’m like, ‘okay no worries’,” she stopped for a moment to take a bite of cake before continuing, “And you’ll never guess what…!”

“What?” James leaned forward in anticipation, his elbows resting on his knees.

“She turns up an hour late with Jackson.”

“She never!” James gasped, “But it was girls night!?”

“I know!” Y/N huffed. She swilled the coffee around in her mug before taking a swig.

“Wait.” James held a finger up, “Wasn’t Jackson the one that cheated on her?”

“Yes!”

“Wow.” James let out a bemused laugh, “No wonder you’re annoyed.”

“It’s just so frustrating.” Y/N sighed through a mouthful of spongecake, “No matter how many times we tell her he’s a piece of shit she won’t listen.”

“Well, not everyone can have boyfriends as lovely as yours.” James teased, slipping the last bite of cake onto her plate.

“Very true.”

“So, what did you say to her when Jackson turned up?”. he pressed, his eyes twinkling.

[pablitogavii]

have u heard about gavi injury:((( he could be out for 9 months and i just cried so bad today:(( can u write a fic of reader comforting him after it? :( thank you and we all wishing him a speedy recovery 😭

First, it’s really hard to write about this..he deserved better 😭❤️

Till Forever Falls Apart

He got injured and when he came home to you everything changed..you expected him to struggle..but this was completely different Pablo..no more smiles..giggles..happiness..just a grim face and painful expression when his pain medications wore off.

“Would you like the cold compress while you wait amor??” You asked but be was just staring at the screen in silence not even watching the show.

“Pablito? Please,talk to me amor..it’s been days” you sat down and when he felt the couch dip he finally looked at you.

“Yeah, cold compress is fine..” was all he said and you sighed walking towards the kitchen to bring it to him to place it on his knee.

“Are you hungry??” You ask but he just shook his head grabbing his crutches about to get up silently.

“I’m tired. Maybe you should just leave me..I know I’m not what a girl needs right now” he said with tears in his eyes and your face froze as you stood up as well. What the hell was be talking about!!? Why would you leave him now??

“Amor..what..??” you couldn’t even bear to finish that sentence feeling your own eyes fill with hot tears.

“I’m nothing anymore!! All girls want is a football star and I can’t even walk now! I’m like a baby learning to walk again..just please..you fell in love with a footballer and not an invalid!!!!!” he was crying now and so were you. How could be say something so awful about himself to you.. doesn’t he know that hurts you more than any insult he would give you..you couldn’t stop sobbing in front of him.

“How could you be so selfish Pablo!? Nothing!? You are nothing!? And what about people who love you,huh!? Don’t you think they would suffer to hear you say that!? I didn’t fall in love with Pablo Gavi!! I fell in love with Pablo..my Pablo..boy who buys me flowers on the weekends..and takes me on walks..my Pablito who hates that nickname but let’s me use it anyhow cause I like it..I am here because I WANT TO BE HERE WITH YOU..FOREVER amor!!!!!!!” You were screaming by the end and he was holding onto every word now crying himself and sitting back down cause he couldn’t hold onto crutches anymore.

“I’m sorry preciosa..” he sighed crying into his hands as you took them in hours and pulled him to you chest where he continued to sob.

“Shh..shh it’s okay..I’m here..you’re okay” he was crying loudly while you rubbed his naked back gently kissing the crook of his neck and shoulder..(gif)

“I’m scared..I’m so scared amor” he menage to say and let out a sigh nodding your head and holding him tightly.

“I’m scared too cariño..but we will figure it out..first the tests..then the operation..and then the recovery. I’ll be here every step of the way and I believe in you..we all believe in you precioso” you said pulling back a little to clean his tears and he slowly calms down.

“What if this is the end of my career?? What if I’m too scared to play again?” He asked and you kissed his forehead longingly.

“You love football too much to quit..I know you and I know this is just your fear talking..once you’re back on that pitch, you will know what to do..trust me??” You ask and he smiles weakly nodding his head looking adorably into your eyes.

“I trust you preciosa..” he said and you smile nodding your head kindly and kissing his forehead. Later you helped him to bed, tucking him in and bribing his evening medication with some water.

“They’re all tagging me and I just can’t look at the screen right now..” Pablo said and you nod taking his phone and putting it on charger.

“They know you appreciate it..just rest cariño..this is your time to relax and take care of yourself” you say and he smiled thinking to himself how everything seems to be easy coming from your mouth. You bring him peace..you’re him home.

“With you by my side..come here preciosa” he said opening his arms and you smile carefully getting under the comforter not to hurt him before laying your head on his chest as he pulled you close to him.

“Don’t ever say that again..it hurt so much to hear it “ you say still crying over his words.

“I promise..I love you so much!!” he said kissing hour head and you look up making him kiss your lips.

“I love you too!!” you say into the passionate kiss you two shared then. Then, cuddled up together you fall asleep ready to face everything days bring together!!

[strongheartneteyam]

Not the type of girl for you.

Pairing: Neteyam Sully x human!nurse!female!reader

CW: a bit of angst but mostly fluff, wounded neteyam, mentions of blood (nothing graphic but reader is a nurse, right?), friends to lovers, kissing, physical contact, cute neteyam, sexual tension, hurt/comfort, anxious reader, reader thinks neteyam won’t ever have romantic feelings for her because she’s human, love confessions, neteyam flirting with reader

Another one of my works that had been forgotten for ages on my Google Docs and i’m now reviving this pookie and posting it for you guys to see lol comments and reblogs will make me feel so loved and supported! I love you guys so much 💓🌿

na'vi words: sevin tawtute (pretty human), syulang (flower)

Slightly proofread.

⋆°⋆ ͟͟͞͞➳❥

I love you, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I love you

I didn't mean to say what I said

I miss you, I mean it, I tried not to feel it

I can't get you out of my head

I'm not the type of girl for you

And I'm not going to pretend

That I'm the type of girl you'd call more than a friend

Your Type (Carly Rae Jepsen)

⋆°⋆ ͟͟͞͞➳❥

“Look, if I don’t tell you this now I don’t think I’ll ever have the courage to, so… Here it goes…” You said as you wrapped a bandage around Neteyam’s wound after you had cleaned it the best you could but there was still a bit of blood in it. It was natural, though. "I..." You sighed nervously "I like you. I'm sorry..." 

You finished tending to his wound and left the bandage at the cold metal table right next to where Neteyam was sitting down while you took care of the wounded areas in his body.

Neteyam looked at you, confused and surprised. He didn't expect to hear those words... at all. He always thought you only saw him as a friend.

"I know nothing will ever happen between us, Teyam, and I don't expect you to answer. Honestly, you can just walk out of here or ask someone else to care for your wounds. I understand if you don't ever wanna see me again. I don't want you to think of me as clingy or that I'm trying to force something because I..." Neteyam watched you non-stop while you were word vomiting "I'm not. I swear. I'm sorry... I made everything awkward. Now we can't be friends anymore. Well, you're all set. Your wounds are taken care of. Hope you heal fast. Gotta go. Bye."

You started to walk fast so you could run away from that uncomfortable situation you thought you had brought upon the both of you but Neteyam quickly got up from the medical chair made specially for the na'vi, bigger than a regular human one, and he ran to you, his long, toned legs helping him, as he only needed like four steps to get where you were, way fewer than a human guy would need.

"(Y/n), wait!" Neteyam exclaimed. You couldn't believe he was talking to you and not to tell you to never speak to him again and that he would never like a human - a demon - girl.

"Can we... talk about what you just said? It's an important piece of information." Neteyam chuckled and then gave you a big, warm smile.

That was so like him. Caring so much about others, trying to make everyone feel comfortable and at ease. That's one of the key things that made you fall in love with him. How beautiful he was on the inside too. If you forget his transcendental na'vi beauty, he would still be so, so beautiful because of how altruistic, kind and brave he was. You felt your heart ache inside your chest. You knew how much you loved Neteyam and how you'd probably love him forever. But you also knew he could never fall in love with a human girl. He wasn't fond of humans. He took after his mother, Neytiri. And you didn't blame him. You weren't that fond of your own race either.

“Can you tell me why you think I wouldn’t like you back?” Neteyam chuckled softly and smiled, his sharp fangs almost making you faint of captivation

Why did he have to be so freaking magnetic? Neteyam made it insanely hard for you not to have all those feelings for him.

“Well, for one, I am human…?” You pointed out, your eyebrows furrowing in confusion

"(y/n), you're not just any human. You understand and respect my Planet and the na'vi ways, you work helping heal our kids and warriors and I think I sense some love for Eywa in you. Being human is not a reason for me not to like you." He smiled, reassuring you "I've actually had a crush on you for... some months now." He confessed as his tail moved from side to side, making his joy apparent

Wait, hold on... what? Did Neteyam just say he had a crush on you? You definitely were not expecting that.

“What did you just say?” Your eyebrows were still furrowed as you chuckled, unbelieving

“I said I like you too, sevin tawtute.” Neteyam smiled and got closer to you, pulling you in, bringing you dangerously close to his strong but soft body

Suddenly, Neteyam put his big hands under your arms and lift you in the air and you feared falling so, before you knew it, you were wrapping your legs around his waist.

His smile grew wider and he said “I’m gonna start courting you now. Do you even realize how pretty you look in your nurse uniform?” His flirting made your heart skip a beat and your legs felt weak. Good thing he was holding you in his arms.

Oh my God… Neteyam was actually holding you in his arms and he said he liked you back and that he was gonna start courting you… That didn’t sound real. You started to wonder if you were dreaming about him again. It used to happen fairly often. You were soon awakened from your thoughts by a sultry masculine voice.

“Syulang?” Neteyam called, realizing you seemed to be somewhere else, and you smiled at him when you understood that it was not a dream but actually reality. Neteyam smiled back. “You get so distracted sometimes." He chuckled "So cute.” Neteyam kissed you softly and quickly, leaving no time for you to even see it was coming before his lips were pressing tenderly against yours. His kiss felt sweet and caring, like you were precious to him. His lips tasted like Paradise and that's exactly where you felt you currently were.

⋆°⋆ ͟͟͞͞➳❥

Taglist:

@yeosxxx

[lily-fics-11]

I Can See You: Chapter 5 (Ellie Williams, TLOU)

I Can See You

Fic master post here

*Not beta read

This took forever and I’m so sorry😭 Since I last updated, I took a trip to see my girlfriend and she came to see me too (if it seems like I’m in my lover girl era it’s because I am). I went on a trip to Disney (I am an extensive planner, I even made spreadsheets. I put my heart and soul into it) (I had to prep my body and mind as well, for spending that much time with my mother, also the Florida heat and tons of walking). I’ve done a bunch of babysitting and have been on the hunt for a full-time job! I missed writing and hope to get to do it much more often now!!!

Ellie Williams is a player, on and off the lacrosse field. You begin tutoring her so that she can get her grades up and stay on the team. You try to keep things professional, however, your affection is a great motivator. Ellie wouldn't be caught dead with you so you become her secret mission. 

Chapter 5

Ellie gets a little jealous when another girl shows interest in you. You share many sweet moments as she tries to spend every second with you that she can.

Word count: 4k

CW: *Ellie and reader are both 18* profanities, sexual innuendo/references, semi-intimate situations, mentions of drinking/smoking weed

You and Ellie spend the rest of the time before her practice kissing and planning dates. Neither of you can wait to share your dorky interests with the other. 

Picking up your phone, while getting ready to leave, you see a text from Elise. It’s not about homework. You audibly groan and Ellie raises an eyebrow.

“I got a text from Elise,” you tell her and then read it out loud. “Are you going to Kyle’s Saturday night? I’m hoping to see you there.”

Ellie’s face scrunches up in disgust, but she doesn’t say anything.

“I told her to only text me for school stuff. I’m going to remind her,” You tell Ellie, then type out a text while reading it out loud. 

“I'm happy to answer your questions about school work, but I’m not looking to be involved with you in the way I think that you want us to be. I’m your tutor now and that wouldn’t be appropriate.” Ellie laughs at that, you ignore the irony. “Also, I’m seeing a girl that I like a lot, you and I aren’t going to be anything more than friendly.” 

“You tell her.” Ellie nods in approval, hyping you up. “That girl better watch herself. She might be disrespecting what you want on purpose, but she doesn’t know that she is disrespecting me too.”

Elise asks who you are seeing so you tell her that the girl goes to North, not someone she would know. Ellie laughs again, though somewhat maniacally this time. 

Ellie hugs you while saying goodbye, holding your close, not letting you leave until she is satisfied. She kisses you softly, longingly, and the taste of her lips lingers on yours for a while after you have parted ways. 

Ellie calls you that night, to check that no one was bothering you. You tell her that Elise had continued asking more questions but you stopped answering.

Ellie was not happy to hear that. 

The next morning you get a text from Ellie.

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: You free during home room today?

You: Yes!

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Meet me in the science wing bathroom at 8

You like the message and finish getting ready. You get a hall pass and leave to meet Ellie. The science wing is empty during homeroom, so it’s a good spot to be alone.

When you walk in Ellie is leaning back with her hands on the sink. 

“We’ve unlocked a new location,” she points out enthusiastically. 

“We have,” you giggle at how cute she is.

“Less than ideal, but I like getting to see you in person.”

“You spend plenty of time seeing me in person,” you tease her. She walks over to you and flips your hood over your head.

“Actually spending time with you,” she specifies grabbing your hands to pull your arms around her.

You lean your head onto Ellie’s shoulder. “It is really nice getting to hang out with you. Even if it’s only for a few minutes.”

“A few minutes?!” She practically yells in your ear. 

“It may be normal for you to disappear for a half hour but if I’m gone more than 5 minutes people are going to think I’ve got explosive diarrhea or something.”

Her face is contorted in confusion until it hits her, eliciting a discouraged sigh.“You study during homeroom don’t you?”

You raise an eyebrow. “That’s what it’s there for.”

Ellie waves a hand in the air dismissively. “It’s like those yellow speed signs, a suggestion.”

Your jaw drops and you shake your head in mock disapproval. “Remind me not to get in a car with you.”

“I am a GREAT driver. I’ll pick you up for our first date and show you.” Ellie says matter-of-factly. Eyebrows furrowed, but a smile pulling at the corners of her mouth. 

Your heart flutters at the mention of a first date, but it is against your nature to halt the banter. “I’ll just have to bring a helmet.”

“I’m coordinated enough to play lacrosse. You on the other hand, I bet you hit a lot of curbs.”

“I plead the fifth!” You stick your tongue out at her. 

“I know that one!” Ellie informs you with enthusiasm, eager to impress you.

“I feel like you are the kind of person to know the rules so that you can break them most effectively,” you tease her and you can tell by the look in her eyes that you are right on the money. 

Ellie throws her hands up in the air. “I want my lawyer!”

You playfully shove her and she grabs your arms to rope you into a hug.

On Friday during your tutoring session with Elise you are working in a textbook. You slide the book towards her to point to the asymptote in the graph and she puts her hand on top of yours. You quickly pull away and you hear a textbook fall off a shelf nearby, but don't think anything of it. 

When Elise asks to borrow your pencil sharpener she tries to slide her hand over yours once again. Before you can react someone coughs loudly from the other side of a book shelf. Elise gets startled and quickly lets go.  

Reading over an answer to a problem Elise had done you hear a very familiar voice hoarsely whisper “what the fuck!”

You look around for Ellie but the first thing you notice is Elise’s arm around the back of your chair. 

“Do that again and you won’t have a tutor anymore,” you tell her sternly and she folds her arms across her chest in a huff. 

Looking around you see a pair of eyes peeking through a hole on the bookshelf, they are green and sparkling in a way that tells you they are accompanied by a smile. Further down the shelf you see another face poking through, Paz, accompanying Ellie on her little mission. 

You pull out your phone and send Ellie a text. 

You: Are you spying on me???

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: I have no idea what you are talking about

You: None at all?

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: You’re right. Now that I’m thinking about it Paz mentioned something about undercover work

You look back towards Ellie and Paz and they quickly duck out of sight. You have to stifle your laugh and refocus on your job.

Friday at the end of the school day you head to the locker room to retrieve your gym clothes, they need to be washed. You are giddy at the prospect of catching a glimpse of Ellie. Even if you don’t get to talk to her, let alone be near her. 

When you enter the locker room you are greeted by the sound of a ruckus. You hear a crash a few rows back, like someone fell into a locker. 

You creep down the rows of lockers to investigate. That requires navigation through a crowd of softball and lacrosse players. You see Ellie hovering in an offensive stance over Elise, who is crouching slightly, as if recovering from a hit. 

“What the hell, Williams?” Elise asks in disgust, shoving Ellie away from her. 

Ellie pushes her back, much harder. “Just think you need to watch yourself, Knolls.”

Elise doesn’t retaliate this time, Ellie plays lacrosse she knows how to rough someone up. “Fuck is that supposed to mean?”

Ellie pushes Elise up against the lockers and pins her there. You may or may not be jealous. “Don’t ever get in my way again.” The gathered crowd collectively gasps but no one tries to intervene. After staring Elise down long enough to make her point, Ellie lets go of her and turns away. Elise watches confused, pissed off, and embarrassed. You know why Ellie is angry with her, though you are baffled that she would display those emotions so publicly. 

What if Elise told someone about this and Ellie ended up in the principal’s office? What would she tell her? Sorry, she was flirting with the girl I like. She was MY tutor first! 

This isn’t a side of Ellie you are familiar with. This aggression is uncalled for, but it’s attractive. Seeing her physically fight for you? It has you in a lust filled haze. 

The crowd disperses and Ellie walks past you. Her cheeks flush when she spots you, realizing you saw what just happened. But her expression turns cocky when she sees the hunger in your eyes. She bites her lip and winks at you. Her hand reaches so that her fingertips brush over your waist. No one else could have seen because of the way you two were positioned. Normally you would have panicked, but the public display of affection was concealed by the angle of her body. Not to mention the way you caught up in the passion you share. 

Even after Ellie passes by, you stand there dumbfounded. Nonetheless, you force yourself to shake it off in order to continue on with your day. But your phone buzzes…

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: You liked that didn’t you?

Everyone else should be gone in about 10

Want to wait around?

You: That was a bad idea, confronting her like that

But yes I liked it

And yes I’ll be waiting 

You dawdle at your locker while the chatting dies down to silence and footsteps are no longer falling.

Ellie approaches you and leans against a locker with her arms crossed. 

“You know where my gym locker is?” You question.

“Did you really think I wouldn’t know where to watch you get changed?”

You playfully hit Ellie in the arm. “Shut up!” 

“My locker is right on the other side.” She admits. “Doesn’t matter how many voices are around, I can always hear yours.”

Focusing down on your shoes you blink rapidly and take a deep breath, unsure of how to handle this attention. Yes, you’ve received this type of attention before. But Ellie being the girl that notices you is still incomprehensible. Not only that, you have now seen her feelings towards you exist outside of when you two are alone. Sweet moments in secret are one thing, but her defending your honor? Of course no one knows that’s what it is, but it doesn't stop your head from spinning. 

Ellie tilts your face up with her pointer finger and your wide eyes stare into hers, they are focused on you. 

“What?” She asks, her worry evident in her expression as she searches yours for a clue of how you are feeling. 

“It’s nothing,” you lie and Ellie raises an eyebrow. She knows you too well now to get away with that. 

“Well…” your voice is soft and timid. “It’s that… you just … seem to care a lot about me. And it’s sweet.

“I do care a lot about you. I guess I need to make that more clear. I have a secret to tell you.” You cock your head to the side in confusion, Ellie leaning close to whisper “I like like you.” In your ear. You start giggling. 

Ellie wraps her arms around your waist and tucks her face into the crook of your neck. You rest your cheek on her soft auburn hair and hold her tight. You feel Ellie take a deep breath, breathing in your scent, and feeling her exhale on your neck sends shivers down your spine. 

“I have to go to practice but I don’t want to,” she mumbles. 

You sigh. “I don’t want you to go either. But super stars don’t skip practice.”

“Super star?” She asks, picking her head up to look at you. Her surprise is so genuine it melts your heart. 

“I watched your old games, Ellie. You really are talented.”

Ellie smirks, her sense of wonder broken by her dirty mind. “Talented,” she repeats. 

You roll your eyes playfully and ignore the comment. “You can’t slow down now. You’ve got another championship to win.”

She nods in agreement, with a sense of duty. “Very true. I’m like a Wendy’s 4 for 4. Plus I am dating the smartest girl and it would be embarrassing if she wasn’t dating the best lacrosse player.”

“I’ll never eat Wendy’s the same way ever again.”

Ellie’s green eyes sparkle devilishly. “Yeah. You’ll be eating me too.”

“I’m looking forward to it. But my super star really does need to get to practice.”

“Will you stay with me until I’m ready to leave?” Ellie asks shyly, a bright flush coloring her freckled face. 

“Of course I can.”

Ellie grabs your hand and leads you over to her locker. She opens it up and pulls out her practice clothes. 

You don’t even pretend that you aren’t watching. Ellie watched you watch her. She pulls her shirt over her head, only momentarily breaking eye contact when the fabric passes over her face. 

Your breath hitches seeing her like this. Her sports bra hugging her exquisitely and her abdomen pleasantly toned. The urge to trace you fingertips over her impressive body burns in the pit of your stomach. 

“Like what you see?” Ellie chuckles, clearly pleased to see you gawking at her. 

“I guess you could say that,” you sigh, pretending like you aren’t ogling at her body. 

“Don’t lie to me, tutor girl.”

You cross your arms and pout. “Fine. I’m impressed. Happy now?”

“Very.” Ellie hooks her arm around your waist and drags you into her, hastily, and you have to grab her shoulders to steady yourself. Ellie presses her forehead to yours and you take a deep breath after she has taken it away. 

“Pretty girl.” Ellie mumbles and you just gaze at her starry eyed. Ellie kisses you gently and you let your hand slide down her body, over her perky breasts and tight abs. You grab her hips firmly when you get there and then distance yourself, still holding on to her. 

“Practice,” you remind her and she groans. Ellie throws on her practice pinnie and then slides down her pants leaving her in her boxers. Thankfully she pulls a pair of shorts over them right away.

Ellie puts her clothes away and starts taking her practice things out. 

“Can you hold this for me?” She asks, extending her lacrosse stick towards you. You nod as you take it. Ellie slings her lacrosse backpack over her shoulder and stops to take you in for a moment. 

“I didn’t actually need you to hold it,” Ellie admits. “I just knew you would look cute.”

You shake your head at her and bite back a smile. 

“I’ll text you after practice,” she tells you before giving you a quick peck on the lips and heading out. 

You stand there dumbfounded for a moment. 

Is this real?

Does Ellie Williams really like you?

This is not something you ever imagined happening, but here you are, kissing her before she goes to practice. 

You literally pinch yourself so that when you get a text from Ellie you know it’s real. 

Ellie sends you a message after she has finished with her practice. You ask each other about your time apart and chat. 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Can you send me your schedule?

You: Plan on stalking me?

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Yes 

I’ve got some of it figured out but I want to try and run into you whenever I can

You send her a picture of your schedule.

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: I didn’t know half these classes existed 

This doesn’t look fun 

Like at all

You: Don’t worry about me😂

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Don’t tell me what to do😡

I’m going to make sure you don’t get too stressed💚

You: I have a few ideas about how you could do that 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: 👀👀👀👀

I will mix wholesome and not so wholesome 

You: Sounds like a plan 

Ellie ends up going on a rant about practice, Abby Anderson did something to piss her off. However, Ellie’s team won their scrimmage so it’s okay.

You text Ellie the rest of the night and end up staying up later than usual until you finally say goodnight. Even though you don’t want to. 

On Saturday Ellie has an away game and then goes to a party with a bunch of her teammates.  

You spend the afternoon studying, then go to a party yourself. Definitely not the same one. 

Elise eyes you from across the room and you ignore her. When your friends ask why you are giving her the cold shoulder you tell them it’s because you are her tutor now. Your friends are relieved, they know how that type of thing has gone in the past. You are happy they don’t know it already happened again.

You socialize outside of your friend group too, politely ignoring any flirting. You have a lot of fun, even if you are waiting for your phone to buzz. 

You hear from Ellie more than you expect to. She keeps you updated on the drama around her and you can tell she had been smoking before she even mentioned it. She is more silly than usual, and it’s incredibly charming, especially since you’ve had a bit to drink. 

Nicole sees you smiling at your phone. “I know that look!”

She gets excited but rolls her eyes when you try to brush it off. She looks you up and down with a bit of an attitude, it’s unlike you to keep this kind of thing from her. 

“Fine. I’m talking to a girl,” you admit and Nicole’s eyes light up.

“Are you going to tell me who it is?” She pesters you, a wildly excited look in her eyes.

You make up a little lie. Nicole isn’t ready for the truth yet. “She goes to North. You wouldn’t know her.” Nicole knows who Ellie is but she doesn’t really know her. Not like you do.

She squints her eyes at you. “Is that all I get?”

“For now.” You take a long sip of your drink, signaling you are moving on from this topic. 

Nicole shakes her head in disapproval. “I guess that’s better than nothing. Don’t think I’ll be forgetting about this.”

You and your friends get picked up around 2 am. On your way back to Nicole’s you get a text from Ellie, asking you to come over. You tell her that you can’t drive anywhere because you’ve been drinking. She says she is high but can walk to you, so you explain that you are sleeping over at a friend’s. Ellie says she will be coordinating with you next weekend because she always misses you extra when she’s intoxicated. 

Sunday is busy. School work, chores, and family dinner.

Ellie gets some homework done too, alongside a bunch of yard work with Joel. 

You get a lovely text from Ellie Monday morning.

You: Good morning:)

What are you doing up so early?

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Getting you coffee 

You: I always make it at home you don’t have to do that 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: I want to. 

And I know your order anyways 

You: How????

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: I took a picture of it that day you came in late with Dunkin 

In case I ever needed it 

You: I’m genuinely impressed

You’re 10 steps ahead 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: 🫡

Meet you at your car when you get to school?

You: What if someone sees us?!

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: I’m like Michael Jackson 

You: ???????

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: A smooth criminal 

You: That’s actually a good one😂

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: I’m glad you said that, otherwise I’d have to beat it 

You: Okay ma’am that’s enough 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Don’t act like this isn’t a thriller for you my PYT

You: You are too much 

In the best way possible 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓:

When you park at school you let Ellie know that you have arrived. 

Out of nowhere Ellie casually strolls by and leaves a cup of coffee on the hood of your car. 

As you are getting out and picking it up Abby pulls in next to you. She gives you a smile and a wave, so you politely wave and smile back. 

Your phone immediately starts ringing and you pick up. 

“NO FUCKING WAY SHE’S GOT THE SPOT NEXT TO YOU!” Ellie yells into the phone and you are grateful the volume wasn’t all the way up. Would’ve burst your eardrums.

“Last year too,” you inform her. 

“My enemy is living my dream,” Ellie practically growls. 

“I would pay good money for you to be my parking neighbor,” you promise her. 

“Top dollar?” She questions, deadly serious.

“Absolutely!” You assure Ellie. You hear her sigh in relief. 

“Thank you. I gotta go but I’ll talk to you later?”

“I would love that!”

“Bye pretty girl,” you can hear Ellie’s smile in her voice.

“Bye El.”

You say hello to Nicole a few minutes later.

“Is that Dunkin’!?” She gasps.

“Uh… yeah?”

“You didn’t even ask me if I wanted any! You always do!” Nicole groans. 

“Sorry, I uh… it totally slipped my mind. I really needed it this morning,” you explain, trying to cover your tracks.

“You should set a location reminder on your phone. When you get to Dunkin’ it will remind you to ask if I want some,” Nicole says, not a hint of sarcasm.

You salute her. “Aye aye captain!”

Your phone buzzes a few times during 5th period, but you don’t check it until class is over. 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Don’t go into 6th period right away (12:35 pm)

My class is right across from yours (12:35 pm)

I want to say hi (12:35 pm)

And maybe kiss you👀 (12:35 pm)

Hi (12:47 pm)

Hey (12:53 pm)

You don’t check your phone during class do you (12:55 pm)

When you see the messages you like them all and hurry to your next class. 

As you approach your 6th period class you look for Ellie. She is outside the door across the hall, mindlessly rummaging through her backpack, despite looking around for you and not at all paying attention to what she is doing. Ellie winks at you when she spots you. 

When the bell rings the hallway starts to clear, so you bend down to tie your shoe to stall. 

Once the hallway is almost empty Ellie gets up and starts to walk over to you. Once everyone is gone she says hi and grabs your hand, giving you a quick kiss. 

“I know you don’t want to be late. I’ll see you later.” Ellie holds your hand for another moment before finally letting go and heading across the hall. She gazes back longingly, a pouty frown on her face, not wanting to leave you. 

You bite your lip, just as sad to watch her go, and think to yourself “I don’t know what I’ve gotten myself into, but I don’t think I care.”

Tags: @bready101, @st4r-b3rries, @tlou-bombshell, @stvrs13, @dinanellie, @everegretseverything, @mikellie, @lamolaine, @0pheli4, @soupycloud, @radioheadfan699, @callmelola111, @hysteriawillnotsuccumb, @normalthing111, @3isosoup, @lmaoo-spiderman, @cqliflower 

[flopsxii]

confess or forever hold your peace — chifuyu matsuno ᥫ᭡.

takemichi has seen who you end up with in the future and it is most certainly not chifuyu matsuno. if only he could make his shoujo addicted vice confess before the other boy has a chance.

fluff — chifuyu x reader, mentions rindou x reader ᡣ𐭩

( i am very baked right now but i had inspiration somehow to write ahhh . y/n is lowkey cutesy but loosely inspired by my girl luna lovegood. SOMEONE PLS REQ SMTH I BEG!! )

takemichi had recently confided in chifuyu about everything. about their futures, some the deaths waiting to happen in the immediate future and his pain of losing hina. naturally, chifuyu was bound to be curious about him specifically, does he die? do all his closest friends die? does she die? questions were swirling around his head, his eyebrows furrowed.

“perhaps… since you know about all of our futures… maybe you’d know if, i don’t know, in a perfect life, me and y/n ended up together?” the boy mumbled with a sheepish expression. “y-y/n? ah!” takemichi flailed his arms around before settling one hand on the back of his neck, rubbing nervously. the behaviour was odd, chifuyu thought, but then again when hasn’t takemichi acted odd? it’d be more fitting to ask when he had acted normal.

chifuyu grunted in response, as if to say ‘get on with it.’ a sigh left takemichi’s lips in response, chifuyu knew everything else, what was one more thing?

“y/n’s fine… still her usual quirky self. in fact, maybe somehow a little more so! still pretty… as you know, obviously. oh! and she has her own bakery, isn’t that nice? she does the most tasty pastries, all unique flavours! and i’m sure she-“ takemichi rambled, heightening chifuyu’s suspicions. “that’s all great news but… you’re avoiding my question.”

“she has a fiancée. she’s actually due to be married this year.” takemichi explained with a somber look at his face. he began to scan his vice’s expression, he truly didn’t want to hurt his feelings. perhaps that’s why he kept all information about where you went in life to himself.

chifuyu gulped, feeling his heart feel impossibly tighter. “i’m assuming… it isn’t me. tell me takemichi. who is it?” chifuyu asked. and then he heard a name which he didn’t expect. haintani rindou. hundreds of thoughts swirled around his brain, clashing into one another and suddenly nothing made sense.

“i don’t know how they met or when… i know you take such care of her and she’s completely seperate from toman but i do believe it could be soon that haitani rindou will dig his claws in her.” takemichi explained, feeling sympathy for his vice and arguably his closest friend.

ᥫ᭡.

on his way home, chifuyu wondered what did you actually see in haitani rindou. he’s aggressive, uncaring, has no positive outlook on being a hoodlum. so why? why did it have to be him?

whilst questions floated around his brain, he ended up in front of your door subconsciously. he wondered if you’d be in, maybe then he’d be able to ask you in person and get the clarity he needs.

he knocked gently, and suddenly heard shuffling inside before the door creaked open slightly. “oh, chifuyu-kun!” you gasped, opening the door wider with a small smile on your face. chifuyu took in your outfit, cute pink overalls with golden stars on the front pocket (presumably drawn on by you), white tights with little bows scattered about, a white long sleeve top peeking out from underneath of the overalls and of course, he couldn’t miss your beautifully done makeup and the long pink ribbon in your hair. as always, you looked gorgeous and cute at the same time.

a blush rose to his cheeks as he fully took you in, “sorry to come by like this, y/n. i just needed to talk to you.” nodding, you opened the door wider, inviting him in. once inside, you made sure to plate up a sweet treat that you had just finished baking, hoping chifuyu would appreciate it.

thanking you, he took a bite and smiled so widely at how heavenly it tasted. “amazing as always!” he applauded causing a pink hue to decorate your cheeks. “so… what did you wish to talk about?” you asked, cocking your head a little to the side in confusion.

“this may seem odd but do you know haitani rindou?” chifuyu inquired, hoping that you hadn’t met yet and takemichi was right, he still had time to prevent anything from happening. “rin? of course, i do! my sister had a little fling with ran… didn’t last long but me and rin became good friends in the meantime!” chifuyu cringed internally at the nickname, he didn’t even have one.

you began rambling out some of the memories you shared with rindou, and it became utterly bittersweet that he knew what the future had planned for you and he didn’t seem to exist in it.

“y/n.” chifuyu interrupted, “do you like him?”

the question was sudden and it stopped your rant entirely. “he’s my friend, of course i like him!” a naive response that chifuyu was expecting, “i mean do you like him?”

a small pout formed on your lips at the question, was all the times that you made chifuyu special pastries (only his favourite flavours, of course) going under the friendship category?

“i like someone else but… i don’t think he likes me.” you admitted sadly, sparking a little hope in chifuyu’s heart. and suddenly it became now or never, either he confess now or hold his peace forever.

“i have feelings for you, y/n-chan. please allow me one date to prove my sincerity.”

“i’d love nothing more, fuyu.” you smiled, pressing a small kiss to his cheek as your cheeks shone a rosy pink.

perhaps chifuyu will be able to change the future after all.